#Feeling the same loss as Link | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

murdrdocs · 3 months

Text

to forever always

description. LUKE CASTELLAN has never had any interest in relationships. but when he sees that look in your eyes, the same one he keeps buried deep down inside of himself, there's nothing more he wants than for you to be with him. except, maybe for you to be like him.

includes. SMUT MDNI 18+ , heavy petting, grinding, making out, dark!luke, loser!luke, dark!reader, implications to maiming, luke is a professional at longing, reader has hair long enough to be pinned back, they play simon says, typical young adult awkwardness, drinking.

wc: 5.5k+

a/n: title from forever always by the driver era. ao3 link. art creds to yazed aljohani

You’ve been at camp for nearly three months when Luke sees it in your eyes.

You’ve been unremarkable at best before then. A late arrival without a capturing story carried along with you, no captivating backstory to draw attention. You stuck to yourself mostly, only coming out of your shell when conversing during training sessions with Luke. He went out of his way to set them up, fueled by the fact that you were older than most, closest to his age, and he didn’t want you to feel left behind when some thirteen year old could easily disarm you in five minutes flat.

Truth be told, he pitied you.

As a result, he trained you four times a week, pushing your body to its limits and sharing anecdotes during your break periods to provide some sort of solace for you. Because at the end of the day, Camp Half Blood was your home. At least, that’s how it was supposed to be presented.

During his share of anecdotes, practically each story starting on that fateful day when he was fourteen, Luke left out his true feelings about the area surrounding you both. He preferred to keep you blinded with things happy enough to make you laugh, with only enough hints of the truth to make you start asking the right questions.

His attentive training has hardened you around the edges. He’s made you a little rougher, or perhaps he’s chiseled away at the stone encasing your true nature, and the person he stood next to was who you really were.

A warrior.

An animal.

Teeth bared, sword raised over the kid lying helplessly at your feet, your chest heaving with effort and a dark look in your eyes. Darker than Luke has ever seen before. It’s victorious, with a hint of a challenge in there. As if you’re daring this kid to stand up, gather his sword, and attempt to best you once more.

Surely, with the way Luke has trained you, if the kid did make an attempt he would end up in the same position in no time.

The sight is exhilarating. It makes the blood rush to Luke’s ears and his fingertips start to buzz with the fuel he’d never been able to use. But he’s in control here. And he has an image to uphold.

He calls your name, firm and demanding. The tone of a leader.

He rests a hand on the shoulder pad of your armor, pushing you back from the kid with enough force to distance you two. He fills the space created, his back to the others and his eyes cutting down at you. It takes you a second to lift your eyes to him, and when you do, when you look up at Luke—at your leader—you’re seething.

Luke really tries to hold his smile in and he’s glad that right now, you’re the only one who can see him.

“At ease. You got ‘em.”

You watch him pointedly, nostrils flared, and Luke lifts an eyebrow with a controlled movement, questioning you, daring you to challenge him.

You take a step back and rid the tension in your shoulders as you adjust your helmet.

You don’t say anything, instead sheathing your sword into its scabbard and watching Luke once more, waiting for orders.

He has trained you well.

‎

The energy around the campfire is palpable. It washes over the bodies of the campers surrounding the bonfire, settling over their skin and providing a glow. Even some of the Ares kids appear to be beaming, although they were clearly sour about another loss.

You, like everyone else, seem to be in good spirits too. A pleasant smile on your face as you watch the scene around you.

The fire burns a mesmerizing gold and Luke finds you watching it reach up toward the sky, your curious eyes taking in as much of it as you could. Your head is already tilted up, so you don’t adjust your position at all whenever Luke steps into perspective.

He stares down at you for a moment, searching for that look in your eyes. The same one he saw during capture the flag a few weeks ago.

Ever since then, Luke has developed a new fixation, one multiplied whenever he got a hit just a few days ago during training.

He’d had you on your knees then. Your chest heaving with exhaustion as you were staring up at Luke with a look so threatening that he wondered what exactly you were capable of. You were definitely at your wits end by that point, but that wasn’t when he saw it. Deep within your eyes was sincerity, maybe a bit of worry, and Luke knew that if he drew his sword down to give you a critical hit, a final blow even, you would defend yourself.

But that’s all.

He hadn’t felt the need to prepare for an opposing attack. He knew you would defend yourself, but not go for the attack. You wouldn’t hurt him. And that wouldn’t do.

So Luke laughed. He threw his head back and let out an exaggerated guffaw as he exclaimed that you looked perfect on your knees. As he insinuated that that was where you belonged. Beneath him. Beneath anyone.

His teasing did the trick. And he has a healing scar on the outside of his forearm to prove it.

Now, standing above you at the campfire, a setting so casual that it was almost sickening, Luke didn’t see any resemblance of anything challenging in your gaze.

Instead, you appear back to usual, sitting alongside a few of the Athena kids yet not actively engaging in conversation, holding a burnt marshmallow on a stick with two hands, your elbows resting on your knees as you look up at Luke with that same pleasant smile.

“This seat taken?”

He’s already sitting down as he asks it and if someone were to return, he knows they wouldn’t have attempted to reclaim their spot.

You stare over at him with amusement written all over your face.

“What if I said it was?”

Luke shrugs. He reaches over, sliding your stick out of your hand and sticking the marshmallow back into the fire. He lets it ignite, turning it over to do the same to the other side, and after a second he removes the sweet treat, extinguishes the flames, and takes a bite out of it.

You’re watching him, waiting for a response, and when you realize that he’d already given his response, you turn back to watch the fire instead.

He lets you sit in silence, slowly chewing through the sticky food as he watches the side of your face.

You look pretty like this. The amber glow of the fire illuminates your face, casting visually stunning shadows across your skin, highlighting places Luke has noticed but never appreciated until now.

He has always known you’re pretty. He’s known it since you walked into camp, confused and stunned as demigods clustered around you.

Luke remembers looking around at his fellow campers, noticing how judgmental they seemed. Because, in all honesty, you weren’t like the other people that came to Camp Half Blood. Not terrified, young, and lost in the world.

Not only were you older, but you had a certain stance to you that told Luke you weren’t confused, just curious. Your head was lifted, your shoulders pressed back as you held up the thick straps of your stuffed book bag. You were faking to be unbothered, but as you eventually confirmed Luke’s prior assumptions, you were worried.

Worried about the sea of young faces you saw. Worried that coming to Camp Half Blood at your age was a mistake.

Until your eyes met Luke’s. His dark eyes were watching you, analyzing your form for potential. Trying to find areas that could be molded into a fighter, and aspects that didn’t have to be changed one bit.

According to you, seeing Luke made you feel comfortable. Seeing Luke made you feel like coming to camp wasn’t a mistake at all.

He is glad that you arrived as well. Because before you, Luke felt alone.

He was looked up to, admired, respected, but rarely seen as just a peer.

And even further, before you got here, he hadn’t seen himself being romantic with anyone.

But now, sitting here with the gold of the fire affecting his mood in the same way he affects it, he has the sudden urge to intertwine your fingers with his or throw his arm over your shoulder. Maybe pull you into his side and plant his lips on yours, effectively claiming you as his and letting you claim him as yours.

Instead, he knocks his shoulder against yours.

“What’s got you looking so sad over there? We won today. You should be celebrating.”

You laugh a little, but it’s not one of the big and genuine ones you give him when he cracks an impressive joke.

“Give me something stronger than s'mores and maybe I’ll celebrate.”

Luke faces back towards the fire as he tells you, “that can be arranged”.

He notices you watching him from the corner of his eye. He can’t tell if you’re smiling, and if you are, if it’s one of genuine interest or one of amusement derived from misunderstanding his tone for a joke.

Either way, you hum. “Don’t tease me like that.”

He tilts his head a little. “Bold of you to assume that I’m teasing.”

He stares at you and a moment of understanding passes by.

Then, “but only if you tell me why you look so sad.”

Luke knows he’s a brave person. Hell, he took on a dragon at just seventeen and lived with nothing but a scar as a reminder. (And the plaguing nightmares but what the others didn’t know won’t hurt them)

But he feels a different form of bravery find him as he reaches a hand out, plants his thumb at the corner of your lips, and tugs upwards.

“You know what they say about turning that smile…” He lets the end of his sentence taper off, raising his eyebrows as if he expects you to finish the overdone phrase for him. It doesn’t surprise him when you swat his hand away instead.

He thinks he sees you hiding a smile when you turn away from him for a second but when you return with another marshmallow, sticking it on the end of the stick in between Luke’s hands, your face is neutral.

He thrusts the white into the burning gold as you begin to speak.

“Do you remember the first capture the flag win? When I was on defense with you?”

One side of the marshmallow ignites and Luke turns it around so the other can do the same.

“When you were taking down the others? Of course I do.”

(Luke resists the urge to add a mention of how attractive you looked then. He doesn’t know how you would take the comment in general, much less when you seem to be going through some sort of moral battle)

“Yeah.” You take a moment.

Luke takes the marshmallow out and blows on it. He lets it cool.

“I didn’t feel like myself then,” you eventually admit.

“What d’you mean?”

You shrug. “I dunno. I felt … meaner. Like–”

“Like you wanted to hurt someone?”

When you nod, you’re staring down at the ground, refusing to look up at Luke.

He doesn’t know why he does it, but he lies.

“That’s normal for demigods.”

That gets your attention. You look over at Luke with hope in your eyes, the pair shining in the light as they flicker back and forth between Luke’s own gaze.

“Really?”

Not allowed to back down now, Luke nods.

“Yeah. That rage you have within you. The need to beat someone, to be better than someone. I feel it all the time.” And that, that right there, is the stone cold truth.

He’s never admitted it to anyone else before, but with you, things feel different. He figures that this feeling he has around you is what some religious people feel in their faith. Maybe what some of the other believers at camp feel in regards to their parents.

Luke pops the marshmallow into his mouth whole.

You look relieved as you speak. He hadn’t noticed the tension in your body until it’s gone.

“So I’m not messed up?” Your voice is small, weak, insecure, almost.

Luke almost feels bad about lying to you.

Almost.

“Not any more than the rest of us.”

What he doesn’t say is: not any more than me.

As soon as his marshmallow is swallowed, he asks you to meet him later that night.

‎

Luke feels like he’s been waiting ages for you.

He’s paced a path in the dirt, twirled the small dagger he kept on him until his fingers could no longer grip the handle comfortably, and he’s started to gnaw on his bottom lip in anticipation that at this point he worries that they aren’t kissable anymore. Because no matter how much he tries to lie to himself, he invited you out to the clearing that you train in with one intention in mind.

He digs into the pocket of his cargos, searching for a second before his fingers wrap around the small tube of chapstick he got from one of his sisters. Cherry flavored, artificially so, but it still smells pleasant enough. Whenever he’d received it from her it was fresh, the seal unbroken, but since then he has used at least a quarter of its contents.

The balm glides over the broken pieces of skin, smoothing them out as best as possible, and then Luke recaps the tube and stuffs it back into his pocket.

It’s no sooner that the lip balm has found a home again that he hears the thud of a shoe against the soft ground behind him.

He doesn’t turn around, not yet. He doesn’t want to seem too eager. Instead, he twirls his knife again, a little slower this time to prevent it from slipping and falling onto the ground embarrassingly.

“Didn’t think I should’ve brought a weapon.”

Just the sound of your voice makes Luke’s insides flutter. He feels stupid, silly even, to have such a crush like this. He feels juvenile.

A smile briefly blooms across his face before he snips it off, turning around to look at you as neutrally as he can manage.

“You should always keep a weapon on you. Don’t you remember rule number one?”

Luke watches you reach behind your back for only a second before you brandish the dagger he’d given you for him to see, a triumphant smile on your lips.

“I’m a good listener. Don’t you remember?”

Proud, Luke tucks his dagger back into its holster and you do the same.

He takes a step closer to you as he proposes his next question, a hand reaching up to flick off an imaginary lash from your cheek. He doesn’t know why, but as of today he’s found himself touching you more. Searching for any reason to justify feeling your skin against his.

“How good of a listener are you?”

Your head tilts a bit, eyes squinting, and he realizes that it’s an action he does often. The implications of you picking up things from him makes his chest bloom with something. Pride, maybe?

“Try me.”

You step back, giving Luke a full view of your body.

He lets his eyes scan your frame once. Taking in your messy hair, pinned up for the night. Your sweatshirt with some school on it. Luke, not knowing much about the outside world, doesn’t know if it’s college or high school, much less its location. But it’s well worn in, clearly loved by you. You’ve paired it with a loose pair of pants, and Luke has suspicions that if he were looking at you from behind, the flowy material would perfectly outline your ass.

He clears his throat and meets your eyes again.

“Okay…” he thinks for a second. “Simon says: touch your nose.”

You snort, rolling your eyes, but then you lift your right hand, single out your pointer finger, and press it against the tip of your nose.

“Simon says: touch your toes.”

Luke watches, seeing if he’ll catch you, but you keep one hand situated on your nose and use the other to reach down to press your hand against the beat up end of your sneakers.

“Hm, okay,” Luke nods as if he’s impressed. Like you would struggle at a kids game.

“Simon says you can stop.”

You stand back up straight.

“Simon says: spin around twice.”

You spin around twice.

Instantly, without giving you a second to rest, “spin around a third time.”

You jerk for a second, but stay still in the end. Luke points, smiling a bit as if saying I almost had you.

You don’t respond but your lips curl up into a little embarrassed smile.

Luke continues giving you orders for a few moments, letting you get comfortable with the preface of “Simon says” just before he gives the final blow.

“Kiss me.”

There’s no order from Simon before it. Just Luke. He gauges your reaction. And when he sees you stay put, he tries to move on.

“Simon says–”

But then you’re walking towards him, and you’re reaching up to rest your hands on his shoulders, and you’re pulling him down to reach you better, and then you press your lips to his. It’s light, a barely there touch, and then you’re pulling away, walking back to your spot, and standing straight, waiting for your next order.

“I didn’t say Simon says.”

Proudly, you tell him, “I know.”

There’s a moment where the only noise is that of nature. Of the harmony of the world existing around this possibly unharmonious moment. The brief balance could easily be thrown off by your reaction to the next bit. If Luke were being dramatic, he would claim that your reaction determines the fate of the world, and maybe even of his mission.

He takes a breath, and then takes the plunge.

“Simon says: kiss me again.”

This time, your kiss is firmer. You’re standing on your toes a bit, overcompensating for Luke who still stands tall with his shoulders back and his head up.

Eventually, he dips his head down at the same time that he finally gets to touch you.

It’s small, nothing but a hand on your hip, but the context of it changes everything for him. He’s touched you before, brief presses of his fingers against a part of your body to emphasize a point, or correct your posture, and then earlier when he reached out for the delicate skin on your face.

Those things were friendly, that of a mentorship even.

Nothing to this degree.

You tilt your head and deepen the kiss, opening your mouth wider as you start to take control. And Luke hands it to you.

He grips the loose fabric of your pants, takes the tiniest step forward, and presses himself against you. In return, you nudge closer to him, holding the sides of his head and keeping him steady to allow yourself to explore his mouth.

He’s a little lost, he’s never gotten to this base with anyone before. Besides the time he kissed one of the Aphrodite kids as part of truth or dare years ago. But that kiss was nothing compared to this, not even on the same scale.

In this field, he’s inexperienced.

For fear of making a complete fool of himself, he simply mirrors in the form of reciprocation.

When you press your tongue into his mouth, he does the same, meeting you not quite in the middle and simply doing what you do.

There’s a moment there where you leave Luke’s lips, and he’s preparing himself to be upset when you pull away, but then your lips pucker and you suck his upper lip for just a split second, and you return to kissing him like his knees didn’t just get a little weak.

Fortunately, the slight lapse presses his crotch against yours again, and you suck in a breath when Luke accidentally grinds his boner into you.

Sensing that it’s something good, and satisfied that he’s not the only one as aroused as he is, he does it again. This time intentionally.

He frees his grip on your pants to move his palms around, pressing into the top of your ass and the end of your back, pulling you closer to bump your crotches.

This time, you do peel away from his lips completely, but it’s to let out the prettiest sound Luke has ever heard.

Your eyebrows are pinched together a bit, your lips shining in the torch light and parted.

You’ve only been apart for a couple of seconds, but Luke is on you again.

He sacrifices the grip he has on your lower half to stretch his hand along the connection of the back of your skull and neck, fingers spreading as far as the tip of your spine to an inch into your scalp.

He lets go of the insecurities he has in his lack of experience and just kisses you. His immediate intention isn’t to take control from you. Rather, it’s just to have you as close to him as possible.

You respond eagerly. Arching into him, slinking your arms over his shoulders, pressing your hands into the muscles along his back. At one point, you lift your leg and nudge your knee against Luke’s side by way of getting even closer to him. The position change allows the first real touch of your centers together and your head falls back, exposing the pretty sight of your jugular to him.

There’s a moment there where Luke has the urge to wrap his hand around it. But he fears what your reaction would be so he flexes his hand, and lets the thought evaporate into the stiff night air.

Luke knows that he feels as he does because of the hormones swirling throughout his body, but he has the feeling that he can trust you. Really trust you. Enough to tell you everything he’s ever wanted to tell anybody.

“Do you trust me?” He says it to you, his hand pulling your head back towards his, your lips mere centimeters a part.

You nod, the tip of your nose nudging against his with each movement.

Luke kisses you once, then tells you, “the gods, they–”.

He doesn’t have a spiel planned, but his need to tell you everything has him covered. He knows that once he starts, he won’t be able to stop. Not until you understand your parents as he does.

You put an unexpected dent into Luke’s poorly conceived plan when you shake your head.

“Don’t wanna hear about the gods right now, Luke. Just wanna kiss you.”

And the way you say it, like it’s something you need rather than just want, makes Luke abide completely.

His free hand slips under your shirt, pressing his palm flat against your torso, and giving himself the first real press of skin on skin. He sighs, pulling away from your lips to knock his forehead against yours.

He slides his hand up until he finds where your bra would sit. But he doesn’t run into any more material. Instead, he reaches a hill, one he nudges his thumb against, reaching up until he finds the beginning of your areola. Then, as if he’s realizing that he’s going further than he should be, he pulls his head away and looks at you.

“Is this…?” The question makes him feel vulnerable. If he finishes it, he bares his wants out to you. And he knows that you have done the same for him already, but he doesn’t feel ready to invite the possibility of rejection.

So instead, he raises his eyebrows and waits for you to catch on.

You nod, biting down onto your lower lip. Your hands begin to search, too, leaving behind the sides of Luke’s face to tickle through the grown out hairs at the back of his head.

What follows is the most carnal display of want that Luke has ever been part of.

He starts by tweaking your nipples, applying light pressure and then smoothing it out when you moan. He watches your reactions to try and figure out what to do next, but luckily you end up pulling his hand away yourself, leading it to the elastic waistband of your pants. You look at him pleadingly, not needing to say what you want for Luke to take initiative.

Luckily, the favor is returned.

You unbutton his jeans, pull them down just enough, and reach a hand into the fabric, touching along the gingham pattern of his briefs.

There’s not much coordination to it at all, but it doesn’t seem to bother either of you. From how Luke sees it, you’re equal amounts of eager, pressing against each other in multiple areas as if you’re both attempting to fuse your bodies together.

In the excitement of it all, Luke accidentally bumps the heel of his palm against your center. He assumes that it would have hurt you, so he’s close to apologizing.

Until you moan.

That’s all it takes for Luke to push away the rest of his pride and insecurities. He takes a breath.

“Will you … can you show me what to do? How to make you feel good?”

Your reply is instant. “Two fingers.”

He singles out his pointer and middle finger.

“And then go...” You wrap your fingers around his wrist, pulling his touch up to find something that his fingers catch on, a bundle of nerves that apparently feels good for you. You nod, sighing out a small “right there”.

He feels a little dumb when he asks, “What do I do now?”

“Rub. Circles are best, but side to side works too.”

So that’s what he does.

He starts slow at first, the circles a little wide, but they feel good for you. You’re nodding, eyes fluttering shut a bit. You return your hand to Luke, pressing over his dick, and then sliding a little further down until you reach his balls.

He tries to hide his sound, but a hitch of his breath comes out anyway.

There’s a tree stump just behind you, a product of an accident Luke has yet to tell you about, but you direct him towards it, standing over him for a second when he falls back to sit on it. The two of you have sat on the stump a few times before, but never in this capacity.

Luke watches you climb over him, straddling his hips, and pushing your crotches together.

Then, you grind.

One of Luke’s hands finds your ass, the other reaches back to connect with what’s left of the tree, reclining his position just enough to provide more room. He lets you do the rest, spurring you on with little nods and small breaths.

It’s not like you can see him, not when your eyes are pinched shut.

Luke wants to join you. His eyes threaten to close and submerge him in a void that would enhance every single feeling. But closing his eyes means getting rid of this sight. And he never wants to forget what you look like right now.

There’s sweat beading along your hairline and running down the side of your face. Your face is one of relaxation, save for the tiniest crease of concentration between your eyebrows. Luke can tell that you’re warm, and not just by the perspiration. But clearly his training has been paying off because your body doesn’t show fatigue. Your muscles are still taunt, your movements are still languid. You don’t show any plans of stopping anytime soon.

And at first, that’s what Luke wants.

There’s a few moments where he’s lost in oblivion. Where he pictures the worst thing in the world happening, and it’s you getting off of him. The feeling is so delicious, your centers grinding together, bumping clumsily yet still working in both of your favors.

He doesn’t want it ever to end.

And then he cums.

Again, he tries to hide the sounds he makes. But a groan rips through his throat, jumping out of his mouth and falling directly onto the fabric of your shirt when he rests his forehead against your chest.

He uses you as an anchor, his big hands gripping any part of you that he can find. He grips your clothes as he attempts to tether himself to the here and now.

He’s huffing, spent even though he did none of the work. Eventually, he lifts his head to search for your lips, but then he winces when you keep going.

He’s speaking in fragments. He’s trying to communicate his sensitivity. But you only shake your head, speeding your hips up a bit more.

“Sorry, ‘m sorry. I’m almost there. Swear, Luke. I swear…” and it’s just then that Luke is presented with the prettiest image he’s ever seen.

When his lips are numb and there’s a wet patch pressing against his sensitive cock in his briefs, Luke remembers the alcohol he has stashed within a bush.

He presents it, feeling that same sense of pride spread through his chest whenever you seem delighted at the options, even though it’s just a box of hard seltzer one of his brothers snuck in at the beginning of the summer. When you ask him what it took to secure it, Luke brushes it off, not wanting to remember the poop scooping he’d doomed himself to.

But the sight of you grinning before bringing the first sip of a cracked open can to your lips makes it all worth it.

When you pull it away a bead of clear liquid snags on the corner of your lips. Luke’s eyes watch it glide down your chin, and before he can stop himself he reaches a hand out, once again feeling that bravery, and swipes his thumb at the liquid.

He brings his thumb to his mouth and sucks it clean, surprisingly pleased at the flavor.

You both make your way through multiple cans, and it’s only when there’s a slight slur to your words and a sway to your frame that you ask Luke about your parents. And not about the stories you’ve been told throughout school, or the glorious recounts about how they’ve helped their kids. But the truth. About how Luke feels.

And he turns to you, smiling gently, and begins to tell you, becoming more and more pleased as you begin to express the same outrage as him.

He doesn't have to question if you'll be a valuable ally. He doesn't have to feed you carefully worded lines to twist your mind into siding with him.

With you, it's natural. The same as it is with him.

‎

It’s exactly a week later. Another capture the flag day created a certain buzz that flowed throughout camp.

Earlier this morning, Luke was concerned about winning. That was before he found himself in a similar position as he did weeks ago.

Standing next to you in a clearing, no other campers around to witness something that will certainly be a sight to behold.

Just like before, you’re standing over a camper with your sword raised over his frightened frame. He’s pleading, but his words are useless. They fall to deaf ears.

“No maiming!” He exclaims. “It’s the rules, remember?” His words are spoken with a stutter, the tremor in his voice extremely obvious.

Briefly, Luke looks over to you only to find you already looking at him.

You’re waiting, body tense, ready to attack. All you need is the command.

“Do it.”

There’s a rip and a scream, and Luke’s eyes don’t leave your frame.

He watches the splatter of blood meet your cheek and for once, Luke doesn’t reach over to wipe it away. He leaves it there, leaving the evidence behind as he cups your face delicately, spreading his fingers to miss the crimson, and then using his hold to pull you close and press his lips to yours.

Easily, quickly, you submit to him.

You two haven’t shared things in the most intimate form, not yet at least, but he doesn’t need that with you. Looking in your eyes, seeing that same look that he sees in himself, Luke knows that having your legs spread around his hips with euphoria isn’t the most necessary thing in the world. He would love for it to happen, and he will revel in it when it does happen, but he knows that fucking you isn’t needed to guarantee your loyalty to him.

As you submit to him, smelling of musk derived from hard work, the evidence of your effort on your face, Luke knows that he’s already secured it.

He has your loyalty.

And he can’t shake the excitement he feels towards your potential. Because he knows that the fire blazing deep inside of you can’t be contained for much longer.

He just hopes your internal fire continues to work in his favor and never against it.

#lukesworld!#luke castellan x reader #luke castellan x you #dark!luke #celeste writes pjo #luke castellan smut

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pseudowho · 6 months

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Post-ShibuyaAU! Grey Nanami Kento Headcanons, Part 2

(help me find the Nanami artist in the banner, for crediting and thanks/permission!)

As an accompaniment to my story, Grey (link here); an AU where Nanami survives Shibuya exploration because I'm never going to be over his loss.

Part 1 of Greynami Headcanons, link here

Christmas Greynami Headcanons, link here

Warnings: Severe injury (burns, eye loss), PTSD, alcohol use, depression, light smut, angst, AU headcanons

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Before he met you:

AU!Nanami Kento who takes up smoking again, a habit he had while working as a salaryman. His voice becomes rougher, more gravelly, irritated by the tobacco.

AU!Nanami Kento whose parents weep and stroke his healed burned face the first time they see him post-Shibuya, devastated by the suffering their little boy has experienced.

AU!Nanami Kento who sees that pain in his mothers' eyes every time he visits her. She can't help it. She's just heartbroken she couldn't keep her baby safe.

AU!Nanami Kento who begins to screen his parents' calls, not visit for dinner like he used to, and sends birthday gifts in the post instead of in person. Causing them distress by exposing them to his brutal injuries is a stress he's too fragile to cope with.

AU!Nanami Kento who listens to his fathers' long voicemails every night after a few drinks.

AU!Nanami Kento who often doesn't go home between missions, sleeping against walls in old buildings instead, a cold uncomfortable sleep preferable to a deep sleep with nightmares.

AU!Nanami Kento who alters his wardrobe after his tie, which he was unusually fond of, was destroyed by Jogo's flames. He can't find the tie for sale anymore. His beige suits just don't feel the same without it.

AU!Nanami Kento gives the last vestiges of his emotional energy to Yuuji, knowing he needs support, not wanting Yuuji to know he's struggling, not wanting to add more to Yuuji's already full plate.

AU!Nanami Kento who used to daydream about being a father one day, but now, being loved and giving love in return feels so remote and unlikely

After he meets you:

AU!Nanami Kento who tries to hide his trauma at first, afraid it will be too much baggage for you.

AU!Nanami Kento who is grateful to the very depths of his soul when you make it clear that he could never be too traumatised to be loved; you are each others' therapist, confidant, and sexy best friend.

AU!Nanami Kento, who struggles through reducing his alcohol and cigarette intake, with your steadfast support.

AU!Nanami Kento whose home screen photo is one of you asleep, snuggled into his chest, drooling; you hate it, he absolutely refuses to change it.

AU!Nanami Kento who confesses to you on one snowy evening walk; he tells you the moon looks beautiful tonight and you're on tiptoes kissing him before he can even finish his sentence.

AU!Nanami Kento who takes up baking bread overnight if he can't sleep, the process cathartic and soothing. You know he's had a bad night when you wake up to warm bakery smells.

AU!Nanami Kento and you, whose home becomes a refuge for all the kids who know where the spare key is hidden.

AU!Nanami Kento who has made up the spare room for Yuuta, Inumaki and Nobara at separate points in just one week.

AU!Nanami Kento, who makes sure you buy extra bottles of burn ointment, and delivers them to Maki when he gets the chance.

AU!Nanami Kento, stood at the bathroom counter which you sit on, facing him, your legs wrapped around his hips, as you gently shave around his scars. Kento rests his hands on your waist, slipping his fingers under your shirt, just to feel your skin.

AU!Nanami Kento, whose towel comes loose and drops to the floor, staring into your eyes in challenge. You last a few seconds before your eyes flick down, drinking in the beautiful nudity of him.

AU!Nanami Kento who immediately throws you over his shoulder, and carries you to your bedroom while you squeal and laugh, being promptly de-clothed by him.

AU!Nanami Kento who behaves the second time you sit on the counter, to finish the job you started; he looks at you with a naughty glint in his eye.

AU!Nanami Kento who, with your support and continuous company on his missions, finds his power grows rapidly; he manages five black flashes in a row, and feels he may be nearing domain establishment.

AU!Nanami Kento who, after a rocky start with Higuruma Hiromi, becomes his firm friend, forming an intensely unstoppable duo. Ino is only a little bit jealous.

AU!Nanami Kento who finally calls his parents with your encouragement. He can't help but tell them about you immediately. They're thrilled, and want you round for dinner as soon as possible.

AU!Nanami Kento who is mortified as you and his mother coo over his baby photos.

AU!Nanami Kento who is stunned into silence when, in the car on the way home, you wonder out loud if your babies will look more like you or him.

AU!Nanami Kento who throws you into bed the moment you get home, face between your legs and drunk on the taste and sounds of you, until you're begging him to come closer; he graciously complies, his mind full of your future home, tiny footsteps and laughter as you cling to him in bliss.

AU!Nanami Kento who goes looking for rings on his days off; it's a huge decision, and one he ponders over for months, so in the meantime, he buys you a watch which perfectly matches his own.

+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+

More love for Greynami. I'll do some bigger stories at some point too.

Part 1 of Greynami Headcanons link here

Thanks as always to @silkspunweb for being my muse and fellow unhinged friend.

1K notes · View notes

abbyshands · 3 months

Text

for you

🇵🇸 LINKS | before engaging !!! | m. list | join my tag list!

♡ synopsis; making a home out of catalina island for years on end had been wonderful, but for most of it, you had been derived of the last piece of the puzzle: abigail anderson. you were a skilled medic, so when abby had showed up, you had cared for her, and nursed her back to the girl she was, helping her to heal, and to find home the same way you had. now, it’s abby’s chance to return the favor.

♡ pairing; abby anderson x fem!reader

♡ warnings; lot of game references, some of which include infected, the WLF, plot of the first and second game, loss, violence, etc, general angst (ish) in the beginning, but fluffy at the end, i promise, reader loses her dad in the backstory, and there’s a heavily established backstory for the reader, abby uses nicknames (my love, babe, gorgeous), reader calls abby baby, just general angst n’ fluff tbh!

♡ a/n; sooo this idea has been sitting in my notes app for the longest time, and to be honest, i’m not sure how i feel about the finished product! i don’t think it’s my best work? i don’t know. i like the idea but i’m unsure about the way i executed it. maybe i’ll revisit it at some point, but this is what i’ve got for now ♡

anyway ,, this is for my ray, n’ my ray only. happy bday, gorgeous! i genuinely can’t get enough of you, and getting to speak to you on a daily basis is such a fucking privilege to me. i’m so lucky to say you’re a part of my life, n’ i wouldn’t trade you for the world. i hope you like this, @andersonlore <3

♡ wc; 4.5k

divider creds !

YOUR LIPS, MY LIPS. APOCALYPSE.

If someone had told you four years prior that this is where you would be today, you would’ve checked them for a bite mark.

Because they would have been losing their mind.

2034, and all the years beforehand, were years unforgettable. The person you were couldn’t imagine a life that wasn’t the one you had. Infected roamed, and danger lurked. But love prevailed.

And you were lucky to be a part of it.

You were born in Boston, Massachusetts in the 2010’s at an unlucky hour. To an unlucky life. You had lost your mom before you could say your own name, and the only biological family you had ever gotten to know in your life was your dad, who was the reason you were where you were today in the first place.

When you were young, your dad joined a group once asked to by the leader of it, a woman named Marlene. Since then, and for as long as you could remember, this group has been your place to call home.

They called themselves the Fireflies for the very bug they took the name from: Their goal was to spread luminescence in a world full of darkness. Your dad, who was an incredibly skilled medic, was roped into it when you were younger, for that very reason. And because of the group’s dire need for medics at the time, their leader, Marlene, who was an old friend of your dad’s, asked him to join, all but begged him to, really.

Your dad wasn’t one to deny anyone in need. It was in his nature, and it was why he was such a great medic. So, of course, he agreed.

But only if there would be a place for you, too.

Your dad raised you up as a member of the Fireflies, and then later as a medic, and it was because of him that you were who you were: A resilient individual, a survivor, and yet, a person who embodied compassion, just as he did.

The years went by hazily, the older you got, anyway. You became just as immersed into your work as your dad did, bettering your medical knowledge on a daily basis, be it by old books, rusted cassettes, or your dad himself. But all the while, you managed to balance work, love, and family, and, in a world like this one, that was a lot more than most people could say.

For obvious reasons, you couldn’t remember the 2010’s. Then came the 2020’s, which sped by your eyes. But the 2030’s as a general consensus were years ingrained into your brain. Full of friendship, family, and love? At times. But they also encompassed chaos, despair, and pressure, and changed your life forever.

And forever was a long time.

In the year 2033, all that you believed was true about the world as you knew it, crumbled to the ground. In a land following an apocalypse, it wasn’t uncommon to feel as if there was no way out, as if the life you lived had hit a place of no return.

Now, if only there was a way to fix it. A cure, right?

It was late one evening while you were working on somebody in the Fireflies’ medical center, that Marlene came into the room, expression serious, and voice showing for it. Once you had the person you had been caring for under control, you followed Marlene out of the center, and into a room of a pair of people, one familiar, and one not.

Your dad, and a man who would later become a crucial figure in this tale: Surgical expert, Doctor Jerry Anderson.

You didn’t understand what Marlene, your dad, and Mr. Anderson, as you used to call him, were getting at when you were first pulled into that room. All that they were explaining to you was blurring inside of your head.

Because it was unlike anything you had heard before.

Your ears were told a tale that you had heard on numerous occasions. A girl who was only a few years younger than you, was bitten. You weren’t sure how. But it didn’t really matter, did it? Everyone who was bitten turned into an animal in a matter of days. It didn’t matter how she had gotten the bite mark. It didn’t even matter where on her body the mark was. All you knew was that in a few days, this girl that was being described to you, would no longer be human. That she would no longer have control over her body, and she would no longer know right from wrong, up from down, man from woman. All she would know, was kill. Kill. Kill.

Unless she was one in a million.

Ellie Williams was hardly a human in your mind when you originally heard, but a God given chance, to fix the world as you knew it. You never believed you would live to see the day where a bite mark was a good thing, and yet, it was here, gazing you in the eyes.

Immunity. She was immune. The auburn haired girl had been bitten three weeks prior to the date you heard about this, and zilch. As Marlene had explained to you, it was like the mark was healing, not worsening.

And in a desolate world, where danger lurked every corner, where sorrow was normalized, and where loss was ceaseless, you were desperate. The Fireflies were desperate. Hope like this didn’t come on a daily basis, now, did it?

You jumped on the prospect as soon as you became conscious of it. All of you did.

Graciously unaware that it would blow up in your face.

In the earlier days of 2034, Ellie was smuggled to a Firefly base in Salt Lake City, a medical center, where your dad, Mr. Anderson, and several Fireflies were residing. As head medic by this point, you decided to remain in Boston caring for the members of your group back home, especially in the absence of your dad and Mr. Anderson.

It’s your life’s biggest regret.

Marlene had asked that you come to the Salt Lake City medical center as soon as you could, and to employ someone else to take over for a bit. Mr. Anderson was a good doctor, but he had decided that to perform proper surgery on Ellie, he would need a few more hands. You were honored that it was you he had chosen. To you, it was on the same level as getting an award. And so, alongside Marlene, and a few more members of the group, you made your way to Salt Lake City, your hopes in your hands, and dreams in your heart.

There was a point during the journey, however, where you ran into some trouble. Infected. And naturally, you were not just a medic: You knew how to survive in a world like this, and you knew how to hold your ground.

Splitting up wasn’t usually recommended when it came to any scenario, and for good reasons. However, it was your only choice. You and everyone beside you aside from Marlene, split up to make sure that she was the first one to make it to the medical center. You remember the last thing you said to her like a movie on loop in your head. See you soon.

And it plagues your brain like the virus that grips your world.

See you soon. You wish you had never said it. You wish you had never split up.

You wish it hadn’t happened.

You did see Marlene. But she was no longer alive when it happened. Fear grasped your bones as your body paralyzed, eyes glued to Marlene’s bloody corpse on the second floor of the medical center’s parking garage.

Tears filled your eyes, slipping down your cheeks. And then, you remembered.

Dad.

You took off running, brain not even processing that you could be putting yourself in danger by doing so. Whoever had done this to Marlene couldn’t be faraway from the building for all you knew. Hell, they could even be in it. But you didn’t care.

You booked it to the highest floor, where your dad and Mr. Anderson were supposed to be, heart racing, begging and bargaining to the universe, or whatever God there was, or somebody, to ensure that they were okay. That they were just fine.

There are some days where you wish you hadn’t opened that door.

The pair of them, alongside a third medic in the room, were found by you in a shape similar to Marlene. Naturally, you ran to dad first, small, shaky hands reaching out to flip over his face down body.

But you were too late.

Your mind goes blurry whenever it goes back to recall the memory. You don’t remember much: Tears, nausea, shaking, panic. You remember screaming, loudly, at that.

And you remember passing out, before being pulled out of the room.

The second that Jerry Anderson was announced dead, all hell broke loose, and you knew, you knew, it was over. The chance that had been driving you and your family of Fireflies for the last year, was gone, and it wasn’t coming back. Unless a brand new surgeon was going to generously drop from the sky, you were hopeless.

And it wasn’t even just that.

Because the universe had taken from you the one person you held closest to your heart. To your soul.

Dad.

You had a chance. You all did.

And, then, it was robbed away from you.

You and your dying group made your way back to Boston knowing just that: That you were collapsing. The days passed by in blurs, each one gloomier than the last. You just weren’t sure what to do anymore. All hope for a cure was gone. All hope for yourself was gone.

In 2036, the Fireflies were disbanded by what little members of it were around to do so, and that was it. It was over.

Your home was paradise, and paradise was gone.

You didn’t know what to do. Most of the family you had found here in the Fireflies was leaving, searching for a life away from the one you all had known for years. You didn’t know if you wanted to do the same. Part of you wanted to follow suit and leave Boston. Renew who you were. Adapt, and move on. But Boston had always been home, and by leaving it, you were leaving a part of you behind.

But you didn’t have a choice.

It was an early morning in 2036 when you began to pack your bags, readying to go. Where? It didn’t matter. All you knew was that home or not, Boston carried way too many painful memories, way more than you could bear. Marlene was dead. Mr. Anderson was dead. Dad was gone.

You didn’t see what else Boston had to give, that it hadn’t already taken away.

But just, just, when you were about to say your goodbyes, the universe, who had screwed you over in the past, clearly had different plans.

A few members had heard word, from previous members who had left the Fireflies before you, that on the west coast of the country, there was a chance: A chance to find home again, in a place named Catalina Island, a gorgeous land in California.

Risks had failed you before, and so had second chances. But, for once, you wanted to give in. You had to.

So you did.

That’s not to say that the second you got to Catalina Island, finding home once again in your fellow Fireflies, who were just as shattered as you were, that your tale was over. God, it was really, really far from it.

Because there was one more piece to the puzzle.

Abigail Anderson.

Anderson. The last name rang a bell once it escaped her lips. A blonde woman, body bruised, bloodied, and covered from the arms down in oozing gashes. Her hair was short and poorly cut, and from the way her bones were pushing into her skin, you could tell that she was severely malnourished.

Alongside her was a boy, obviously younger than her. Tousled black hair, bruises wherever you looked, and fully unconscious. In your time at Catalina Island, and as a Firefly in Boston, for that matter, you had never seen any pair of people in worse shape.

Not unless they were dead.

You remained head medic once you arrived in Catalina Island, naturally, and you had been managing that way for the last four years. So, when this woman showed up, this young boy by her side, like this, it was you who took control. It was you who nursed them, and it was you who made their scars, in a physical and mental sense, not disappear, but easier to handle. To bear.

By looking at them, by looking at her, it was like a mirror. You saw you.

Which is why you saw her.

Now, if someone had told you four years prior that this is where you would be today, losing your dad, losing Marlene, and losing Mr. Anderson, but falling for his child, you would’ve looked for a bite mark. But now, come the year 2040, where you had made a new life, one that Abigail Anderson was a prevalent part of, happiness no longer seemed impossible.

Because it wasn’t far away anymore, slipping from your fingers, the way it had on numerous occasions.

It was in your hands.

And you were in Abby’s.

Your eyes were being covered by Abby’s large hands as she led you to a place unknown. You had to assume it was one of the several beaches on the island, sand under your feet, sounds of waves in your ears. A smile had been plastered across your face for what seemed like hours, as Abby dragged you along.

“Come on, Abby. Are you going to tell me what this is about or what?” you asked her for the second time in the last minute. You could hear her low chuckle from behind you, and the way it always happens, comfort surges into your veins.

You had learned from Abby, once you bonded over the mutual loss of your dad and hers at the same man, that once Mr. Anderson had been killed, her and her friends, a few former members of the Fireflies, joined a group named the WLF. You had hence learned that during her time there, she was commonly known as a rugged, scary person, who a lot of people in the WLF didn’t dare insult, nor disobey.

And you couldn’t lie: It was hard to believe that for a second.

You had learned from Abby, also, that her resolve began to slip when she met the young boy who she had made it to Catalina Island alongside, who you had also taken care of: Lev. To put it simply, Lev was a member of a different group, that the WLF was never supposed to come across.

Not unless it was in war.

But he changed her. He did. Some days, you could see how guarded Abby was, how she couldn’t help going back to all she used to know, which was being all but barbaric when she was in Seattle. Closed off, wary. But most days, like today? You knew in your heart, that deep down in hers, Abby Anderson was good. Not innocent, but good.

And that was enough for you.

“Just come on!” Abby chuckled as she walked, not letting up her hold on your eyes for a second as she led you along.

You smiled, shaking your head in mock disapproval. “I have work to do back at the center, and we’re not supposed to be roaming around like this. You know that, right?”

“Babe,” Abby responded in an almost firm tone of voice as her feet quit moving, forcing you to root your body to the spot. It was silent, before she pressed a series of sweet, sloppy kisses to your neck and cheeks, managing to keep her hand over your eyes all the while. She had you crumbling just like that, making you a giggling mess as her lips met your skin.

Her kisses subsided once a million of them seeped into you, and it wasn’t the island heat that had your face warm when Abby was done. “Can you just trust me, please?” she laughed, and you didn’t need your vision to know she was giving you that puppy dog look that had you falling to your knees every time. The one that you couldn’t resist if you gave it your all.

You were too easy. “Yes.”

It wasn’t long before you and Abby reached where she wanted to bring you, and once you did, she paused. She was perched behind you now, large hands over your face, the solacing sound of her sighs coming into your ears. “Okay. Are you ready, my love?”

There wouldn't ever be a day where Abby calling you that wouldn’t make your heart pound in your chest.

“More than,” you easily respond.

As soon as you said it, Abby returned your vision to you, and your eyes can’t help but widen at what you see before you.

Because you never pegged “rugged” Abby Anderson as one for picnics.

“Oh, my God, Abby,” you said more to yourself than the blonde as you slowly approached the scene. Laid out on the sand of the beach was a picnic blanket, a folded blanket, a few pillows, a basket, a few books, and playing cards.

Accompanied by a perfect view of the beach.

“Do you not like it?” Abby asked, and there’s an air of sadness to the way she says it. You turn to look at her on cue, your face one of complete, utter disbelief.

Like it?

“Like it? Baby, I love this. More than know,” you respond, meaning every word. It’s been a long time since someone has wanted to care for you. A long, long time, since you had been the receiver, not the giver.

“Abs, it’s perfect. You’re perfect.”

You can see Abby blushing as you approach her and take her face into your hands, her freckled skin burning in heat. She leans into your touch, pressing her forehead onto yours, and holding your hands in her own.

“I just,” Abby sighed, opening her eyes once more to meet yours, solemn expression across her cheeks. “I just don’t feel like I cherish you enough, babe, show it, that is. Because believe me, I do cherish you. S’just, it’s been hard for me to show you how much. All that you did for me and Lev when we got to the island. Taking care of us. Helping us find a home here. I’ll spend the rest of my life saying thank you for it.”

You can feel your soul healing the more Abby speaks.

“I know this isn’t nearly enough to make up for what you did for us, and I wish it was. But I just figured, maybe. . .it could suffice for now.”

“Abby, baby,” you let a small laugh escape your lips as you say it. “You don’t have to make it up to me. At all. I did what I did, because I saw someone in you. I remember asking for your name, and you responded by asking me where Lev was. You didn’t even care what shape you were in. All you wanted to know was if he was okay. You reminded me of me.”

“You reminded me of dad.”

You couldn’t help but sigh, letting silence seep into the air around you as your brain battled to process what you had just said. You didn’t speak on your dad as much as you likely should: Abby knew that, and so did you. Talking about him made your chest compress, and your throat would fail you, making it feel as if you were choking. As if you were helpless. As if you were there all over again. But Abby knew as well as you did, that when your dad came into discussion, it was for a certain reason.

And for that reason, Abby didn’t speak: She hung fire. For you. For you.

“We live in a world where people combat their own morals just to survive. There’s no good guys. No principles, no rules, no laws. Anyone you come across is just as bad as you, and if not, they’re worse. But when I saw you? I knew. I knew that wasn’t you. Not anymore.”

You know you’re rambling by now, saying whatever comes to mind as soon as it does, but you can’t find it in you to care as you go on. “You want to believe I don’t know how much you care for me. But you don’t need to show it, Abby. I know you do. Right here.”

You take one of Abby’s large hands into yours, and as cliché as it is, not that you care at all, you place it over your heart.

“You feel that, don’t you? That’s all for you, baby. And it’s there that I feel how much you care about me. It’s there that I know.”

The same silence that was here before comes back. But this time, it’s not sad, or dark, or eerie. It’s solacing. It’s warm. It’s home.

And Abby doesn’t need words in order to respond.

It’s her turn to take your face into her hands as she pulls you in close. Her lips meet yours like they have so many times before, her familiar scent hitting your nose as you settle your hands onto her hips. The kiss is slow, and sweet, but passionate, and a burning desire surges inside you to never let her go, to always hold her close. To always call her yours.

You pull back from the kiss once you tire from it, gasping, Abby’s body mimicking yours as she does the same. You gaze into her eyes, the pretty blue ones that always make your heart swell, smiling up at her as you press one last kiss to her lips for good measure. “I adore you, Abby Anderson. You know that, right?” you grin.

It’s the first time you ever hear her giggle. “Me more than you, gorgeous.”

You spend hours there alongside Abby, and it’s the best time of your life. You spend time indulging in a few snacks the blonde packed for you, playing cards, and running around and playing in the sand, smiling all the way. You even get to hear Abby read to you, one of the most endearing things in the world, accompanied by the calming sound of the ocean before you. And when it came time for sunset, you sat down beside Abby, gazing on as amber, ochre, and rose faded into night.

It was perfect.

When it was nearly time for the evening to come to an end, you used the second blanket Abby had packed for your shared night to cuddle up beside her, heads rested on the pillows she had carried along as well. The side of your face was pressed into her chest as you gazed into the sky above you, Abby’s hand rubbing your back in slow circles to console you. Small suns coat the evening sky like sweet, powdered sugar, accompanied by a full moon that looks incredible over the horizon. All you could hear was the sound of the ocean, alongside Abby sighing gingerly every once in a while, or her pressing kisses to your forehead.

Not that you needed much more than that.

Suddenly, the sound of Abby chuckling in your ears snaps you out of your head, and you turn your face upwards curiously. Abby’s smile makes you smile, and it’s no surprise you began to wonder what the blonde woman found so funny all of a sudden.

“Remember how I told you Lev and I had to cross those bridges that were really high up?” Abby asked, and you had to raise an eyebrow, wondering where this was going. “Mhm,” you mumble, which is when Abby goes on.

“Well, before that, we had to get there by foot once we got out of the aquarium I told you about, the one I used to go to all of the time. That part of Seattle is overrun in rushing rapids, so a lot of the buildings around there were a lot more demolished than they usually would be anywhere else,” she explained.

“And, well. . .”

“We walked into this building, and there was a painting of these dogs playing cards. And I asked Lev if he knew our dogs could really play cards like that. Then he asked me if anyone found me funny,” Abby laughed. “It cracks me up whenever I remember it.”

She wasn’t the only one laughing. “Sounds like Lev. And like you,” you smile, and the tale makes you recall a humorous memory of your own. “Once, I was working late at the medical center back in Boston. I was doing research on this girl who had been feeling sick, but I wasn’t sure by what. Mind you, it’s late, and silent, if you don’t count me flipping the pages in my books.”

You giggle just remembering it. “It’s the weirdest thing ever, but my dad was really good at making Clicker noises. Like, really good. Sounded so real it made your heart drop. I was reading when I heard it, and I remember wondering how the hell infected had gotten inside. ‘Course I grab what was closest to me, a scalpel, and I swivel around.”

“And it’s dad.”

That one got Abby to burst out chuckling. “Oh, my God. Of all the things you could get, gorgeous. A scalpel?”

You rolled your eyes in response, playfully so. “What can I say? I’m just a medic. I didn’t carry a gun.”

Once Abby’s done laughing, which seems to take forever, she smiles down at you, pressing one more kiss to your forehead as if to make up for poking fun at you. You cuddle closer into her, letting your body relax in her embrace as a sigh escapes your lips.

You fall back into silence soon enough, eyes glued to the sky as Abby rubs her hand over your back, holding you like you would fade away if she let you go. You run your fingers through her short hair as you press kisses to her neck, jaw, and face, giving her all the love you know she deserves. Your eyes scan her features like she was molded by some higher power, and you can’t help but want to worship her, endlessly.

Not just for what she looks like. But for who she is.

“My baby. It’s like you were made for me, you know?” you whisper in Abby’s ear as your eyes pierce into her blue ones. But Abby’s head shook quickly.

You can predict what she’s going to say in response. “No, gorgeous.”

“It’s you who was made for me.”

—

reblogs are very much welcomed! <3

—

509 notes · View notes

thehighladywrites · 3 months

Text

— “Still wanna fuck me, Azzie?”

☀︎ — pairing: nerd/tutor az x bimbo/ditzy/popular reader

☀︎ — summary: you invite your tutor to a movie night and somewhere along the way it ended up with him giving you a facial

☀︎ — warnings: 18+, nsfw, oral (m. receiving), bimbo reader, virginity loss, making out, daddy az showing you what he has learned, getting your pussy pounded, possessive thoughts, jealous thoughts, az telling reader he wants to eat her out, rhys and cass make a cameo!

☀︎ — amara’s note: sorry for the wait, the smut was killing me but i hope you enjoy hookers!!

series masterlist

”Ahh, yes, oh my god!! Fuck me harder daddy, I’m gonna cum!!! Yes, yes, yesss!!!!”

Azriel slammed his laptop shut and stared at the wall, his face burning with a deep flush, dick stirring, and heart pounding.

Was this really how sex was supposed to be like? He had looked up ‘sex tutorial’ and clicked on the first link, which led him to a dark and inviting porn website. A million flashing signs about nearby milfs and pills to enlarge his dick by atleast 5 inches decorated the screen.

He couldn't quite put his finger on it, but something about the situation felt incredibly sketchy. Especially with the video he was currently watching; ‘cute next-door-neighbor gets fucked by handsome mailman.’

The theatrical moans and exaggerated expressions felt forced, fake and unreal. Even tho Azriel had never had a women under him, he wasn't naive enough to believe that any of it was genuine.

He huffed out a sigh and undressed to take a much needed cold shower. Your movie night plans were later this night and he wanted to make sure he atleast knew how to please you.

You had only sat in his lap and he had practically melted. While he loved that you knew what you were doing, he also wanted a sense of control and knowledge. Azriel always figured something out if he really put his mind to it, and best believe he would learn how to proper please you.

The line between what you two were had become increasingly blurry. Were you just tutor and student or could it be possible that you were both experiencing the same fluttering feelings?

Azriel kept thinking about how had he wanted to be with you, even though he had only known you for a few weeks. You were an absolute sweetheart to him, always clinging to him during the tutoring sessions and being a light in his life he didn’t want snuffed out.

After the shower, he made a decision to meet up with his friends for some advice before heading over to your apartment.

—

Rhysand's spacious living room suddenly echoed with Cassian's booming voice. “Holy fuck, you're finally going to raw-dog a girl?”

The surprising statement grabbed Rhysand's attention, curiosity sparking in his eyes. Just who had Azriel finally taken an interest in?

Azriel shot Cassian an unamused scowl, rolling his eyes as he sipped on the expensive scotch Rhysand had decided to test out.

“No need to scream, Cassian. Yes, I'm going to have intercourse. And don't call it raw-dogging. It sounds disgusting.”

Rhysand raised an amused eyebrow at Azriel's response. “Don't call it intercourse. It sounds too clinical.”

Azriel shrugged. “Fine. I'm getting laid, happy?”

Cassian chuckled. “That's more like it!”

Rhys rolled his eyes playfully. “Just be safe, Az. And have fun.”

Azriel slowly nodded, looking down at his glass, swirling the amber liquid around.

Cassian narrowed his eyes, studying Azriel's every move. Azriel lifted his eyes and met his gaze with equal intensity.

“What are you looking at?” Azriel demanded.

Cassian grinned mischievously. “Do you even know what to do? I mean, you haven’t fucked anyone before, so, do you know how to fuck properly? How to make a girl cum?” he teased.

Azriel's cheeks flushed with embarrassment as he shifted uncomfortably under Cassian's scrutinizing gaze.

“I, uh... did some research,” he admitted, his voice slightly muffled as he avoided eye contact.

Cassian and Rhys exchanged a knowing glance, a smirk playing at the corners of their lips as they both realized what Azriel was implying.

“What do you mean research? Like you watched porn?”

Azriel's blush deepened, his ears turning pink as he cleared his throat awkwardly.

“Uh, yeah... something like that,” he muttered, hoping the ground would swallow him whole.

Rhysand and Cassian exchanged amused glances before bursting into laughter, their chuckles echoing in the spacious living room. Azriel pushed his glasses up so they held back his hair and rubbed his eyes, stressed. After a moment, Rhysand clapped Azriel on the back with a grin.

“Don't worry, brother. We'll teach you all the tricks the ladies go crazy for,” he assured him, his tone laced with promising advice.

—

After a few hours of vivid explanations, videos, and personal advice on how to please a lady, Azriel was more than ready to make you happy.

Azriel stood in front of the snack aisle, feeling the pressure to choose the perfect treats. Snacking was usually his thing, but why was it so damn hard this time? Determined to get it right, he debated between chips that could leave him with sour cream and onions breath and popcorn with an overwhelming variety.

Opting for salted popcorn, he moved to the sweets section. Rummaging through his memory for your favorites, he snatched up two packs of your sour strawberry candies and tossed in a blue raspberry pack because it was his favorite, and he wanted you to try it too.

Finally reaching the counter, just before he paid, he glanced at the condoms on the wall. The old lady at the counter followed his gaze.

“You need some, boy?” she asked, her voice surprisingly loud in the quiet store.

He quickly looked around to make sure no one else had heard, then, feeling a flush rise to his cheeks, he grabbed a packet of extra-large condoms.

—

With your hands on your hips and a narrowed gaze, you looked at the options in your massive closet, feeling on the verge of screaming bloody murder.

None of your clothes seemed good enough for tonight, and despite the fact that it’s supposed to be just a movie night, you knew it was likely to lead to something more.

You'd rather die than be unprepared for what tonight might bring. Your overflowing walk-in closet wasn't cutting it at all, so you had to leave on a last-minute emergency shopping trip. And let's face it, running around in Saks with six-inch heels is no easy feat.

“Alice, it’s an emergency. I need to see the latest collection of lingerie from Agent Provocateur. I know they’re not out in shops until November but is there a chance you can let it slide? Pretty please?” you ask sweetly, flashing your signature smile.

Your usual sales assistant, Alice, whom you've gotten to know well from your frequent visits, returns your smile and gestures toward a private showroom, handing you a flute full of Moët as she leads the way.

A few minutes later, Alice returns with a whole rack in tow, each piece of beautiful lace underwear causing your jaw to drop in awe.

The collection was absolutely incredible, featuring intricate lace, luxurious silk, and sparkling Swarovski diamonds adorning the bras. Your eyes widened to the size of saucers as you watched her pull out each piece, unable to contain your excitement.

As Alice presents each set, her voice filled with enthusiasm and admiration for the craftsmanship, you watch attentively, absorbing every detail.

“This one features hand-stitched lace imported from France,” she explains, holding up a delicate bralette.

You nod, impressed, as she continues to another blue set, “And this one has intricate embroidery along the edges, giving it a touch of playfulness.”

When she mentions another set with sparkling Swarovski diamonds adorning a particularly stunning bra, you can't help but gasp in awe. You reach into your handbag and pull out your black card. “I need the entire thing,” you declare with conviction, your tone leaving no room for doubt as you're already envisioning yourself in every piece.

“Are you sure you want the entire collection, Ms. L/n?” she asks, a hint of surprise in her voice.

You meet her gaze with unwavering determination. “Absolutely,” you reply without hesitation. “I need to look hot tonight.”

“I'll wrap them all up and tell Pierre to put them in your trunk while you finish your drink. I just know you will look amazing in them,” she says with a wink.

You squeal with excitement, giving Alice a hug that almost knocks over a display. “Thanks, Alice! You're a total lifesaver!” you exclaim before darting out of the boutique.

—

Azriel thought he had prepared himself for everything, but nothing could have prepared him for how beautiful you looked when you opened the door. The wind was nearly knocked out of him as his lips twitched into a shy smile.

You flashed him your adorable grin as you looked up at him.

“Hi Azzie!! Come in, we’re gonna have so much fun. I’ve been looking forward to this forever.”

Before he could respond, you grabbed his hand and closed the door behind him. The moment he stepped inside, you enveloped him in a long, warm hug, nestling into his sturdy chest as you wrapped your arms around him.

“I missed you so, so, soooo much. Oh, I also passed my math test. Oh but only because I remembered your lame technique and used it.”

Azriel looked down at the top of your head and wrapped his tattooed arms around your shoulders. He was sure his heartbeat was dangerously quick, but he still pulled you in closer.

“That's fantastic news. I knew you could do it. I’m proud of you.”

He was bummed when you let go of him, but his mood improved when you took his hand and led him to the living room. You guided him to the sofa and playfully pushed him backward until he landed on the mountain of pink fluffy blankets.

“Make yourself comfy. I’ll be right back,” you said, grabbing the bag filled with snacks. Leaning down, you kissed him slowly, loving the way his lips felt against yours, before getting up and leaving.

Azriel grinned, feeling a rush of warmth as he watched you go. He couldn't help but let his eyes linger on your body, admiring the way you moved. Absentmindedly, he licked his lips, his thoughts consumed by what was coming.

Azriel leaned back, stretching his legs out on the cushions as he debated how to position himself. Should he leave one arm on the back of the sofa, inviting you to cuddle in beside him? But then he wondered if that was too forward and presumptuous, maybe you wanted some space.

He put down his arm and crossed them against his chest, but then realized he looked angry or something.

“I look like an idiot,” he muttered to himself, rolling his eyes in frustration. Finally, he decided to be bold and put his arms behind the sofa. After all, he did want you close to him.

He jumped slightly when you came back and had a tray filled with all the delicious snacks he had bought.

You but the tray down and sat on the sofa, crawling closer and closer to him as you put on the movie.

—

Obviously, neither of you were paying attention to the movie as you were both busy with feeling each other up and making out only 8 minutes into the movie.

He had started out by slowly rubbing your back. But you decided to speed things up, gently placing your manicured hand on his abs and lightly scratching. That seemed to be enough to set him off, as he immediately got hard and started kissing you needingly.

You pivoted, sitting on top of him as he wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you flush against his chest. Azriel swallowed at the feeling of your soft boobs pressed against his chest.

His hands traveled further down your back, slipping into your shorts and starting to massage your ass with a firm grip. Meanwhile, his mouth moved to start making bruises on your neck, each kiss leaving a mark of his desire.

Your eyes widened at his confident move, noting how he had become more forward since last time. It was quite the change from the last time when he couldn’t even look at you without a shirt on.

It piqued your curiosity. Did he have someone else on the side? How was he already making you feel so weak? All he did was squeeze your ass and kiss your neck, yet here you were, grinding in his lap. So, you asked, your tone a bit pouty and filled with uncertainty.

“Hey, are you like, fucking someone else on the side?” you blurted out, your perfectly shaped brows furrowing dramatically as you pouted your glossy lips. You were feeling a whirlwind of emotions, and your over-the-top, dramatic ass reaction was a mix of concern and hurt. Even though you didn't have any evidence, the mere thought of him with someone else was enough to make you feel like you'd just die.

Azriel's cloudy, lustful eyes cleared up real fast, and he sat up straighter, a hand on your back to keep you from falling as he panicked at the sadness in your glossed-over eyes.

“No, no, no. What makes you think that?” he asked gently, his voice tinged with concern. Subconsciously, he rubbed your thighs in comfort, his own brows furrowing in worry.

“Because, like, you're really good now. And you’ve never even touched a girl before me, so what’s up? How did you even learn how to do make me wet?” you exclaimed, your voice high-pitched and filled with drama. Your glossy eyes were wide with emotion as you awaited his response, your lower lip trembling ever so slightly.

Azriel wanted to kiss that pouty look off your face but he wasn’t that bold yet. Just the thought made him flustered.

But wait, he made you wet? Cassian had said that girls getting wet was a very good sign because it meant he was doing something you liked.

“It’s not like that. I have not spoken to another girl, I assure you. But I did some research because I wanted to make you feel good. Do you feel good?” he asked curiously, with hungry eyes.

“Oh, okay, well that’s perfect! No other girls, okay? And yeah, I mean, I feel super good. Like, really, really good.” you replied, your voice tinged with a hint of airheadedness as you flashed him a bright, bubbly smile.

“Can I blow you, pleaseeeee?” you asked, your hands softly caressing his chest, your face hovering just inches from his. He chuckled, his fingers fidgeting nervously behind your back.

“You can do whatever you want to me,” he said, and he meant every word. It was official – he was totally head over heels, over the top, painfully in love with you.

You gave him a quick peck before sliding down to the floor and on your knees before finding the hem of his shirt and pulling the material off his body. His physique never failed to make you drool. You traced his abs, his muscles, his tattoos, and kissed on the tattoos down his body.

You played with the buckle of his belt, raising your head to meet his eyes before unbuckling it. You smiled giddily at his reaction, he had a look of extreme pleasure on his face as he nodded for you to keep going.

As you unbuckled his belt and took off his pants, he grabbed your hair and held it up for you, just the way he saw guys do when they we’re about to get head.

The move surprised you but not as much as when you pulled down his underwear. His dick was perfect in size, not small but not painfully big, girthy but not uncomfortably large. And the best part was the fact that it curved a little to the right. Fucking perfect.

“Big,” your ditzy mind couldn’t process more so you dipped and gave his tip licks before sucking on it.

His grip on your hair tighted as he gasped lowly when you started swirling your tounge around the sensitive tip. Azriel’s throaty whines and tighter hold on your hair made your eyes roll back.

Your tongue swiped across his tip, and it was warm. The sensation was even warmer when your lips wrapped around the head. God, and it was all so fucking wet and warm. Especially when you gathered the spit in your mouth, coating his cock as you pushed him deeper down your throat.

His stomach was on fire, face burning as he locked eyes with you — your mouth stuffed with his cock, big, doey eyes slightly watering when he was only halfway in. He had never really acknowledged how big he was, how the thickness of him would stretch out your lips like that.

And when you stuck out your tongue, dragging it along the vein on the underside of his cock, he nearly lost it. What little control he was desperately hanging on to. Because you on your knees before him, looking up at im with lustfull eyes was something he only ever thought of in his wildest dreams, but even then, nothing could compare to this feeling.

The feeling of your hand pumping what couldn’t fit into your mouth, spit drooling from the corners of your lips. Azriel was hyper focused on how your eyes never left his, his cheeks were on fire, the tips of his ears in flames, as he burned with every suck, lick, and stroke you gave.

And he was going to come, right down your throat if he didn’t warn you. The need to release raged in his lower stomach, his muscles worked twice as hard to reign it in. So, he cupped your cheeks with both hands, tilting your head so that your neck craned up at him. Through gritted teeth, he managed to bite out, “y/n, m’gonna cum.”

Your eyes widened with surprise because you hadn’t been sucking him off for long, but he was completely overwhelmed. Instead of pulling off like he expected, you only went back to it. Your motions quickened, your rhythmic pace abandoned as you worked him to the back of your throat.

You were determined to make him finish on your face. The thought excited you, imagining the sensation of his cum dripping down your cheeks.

And fuck if he didn’t finish. With your pleading doe eyes and sinful mouth, he succumbed to the pleasure, letting out a gasp of your name that pitched into a whine. He shuddered as his hips bucked upwards in jerky moves.

“Hah–holy shit, so-so good,” he whined, as he finally let go, busting ln your face, painting it white.

He collapsed above you, breathless and spent before he sat up immediately, his fingers tracing panicked circles on your stained cheek. “That was... incredible, and i’m sorry about your face. I-I’ll get something to remove it” he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. You couldn't help but smile at his words, feeling a warm sense of satisfaction wash over you.

You gave him a sultry look, your finger gliding across your face before you sucked on it. Then, with a seductive smile, you rose and settled into his lap.

“Still wanna fuck me, Azzie?” you whispered huskily, your voice dripping with desire.

The playful glint in your eyes ignited a primal desire within him, and he wasted no time in pulling you closer, his hands roaming eagerly over your body. “More than anything,” he whispered huskily, his lips finding yours in a hungry kiss.

The kiss left you feeling a bit dizzy, your hands falling to your sides as you soaked in the intense sensation. Mid-kiss, he gently guided you onto your back, his lips pressed together in concentration.

He got on top of you, kissing your neck and chest, looking up at you and your expressions as he lined his cock up to your entrance, teasing and tapping your clit before pushing in with a groan.

Azriel was really fucking grateful that he had already come once, because surely with him sinking in slowly, your tight walls enveloping him in delicious heat, he would have come on the spot. Which would’ve been mortifying. Even more embarrassing than the needy moan he released when he bottomed out. It was louder than he intended, his eyes rolling back when you wiggled your hips to adjust to his size.

“Your dick feel amaaazing, m’sooo totally baking ya a cake after this,” you moaned, your eyes going crossed with pleasure as he pumped into you.

Azriel flashed you a shy smile as his brain went fuzzy with desire, body blushing from the heat coursing through his veins. His grip on your hips tightened, his movements finding a comfortable rhythm.

“So fucking tight, so good,” he whined, his forehead slumped against your shoulder as you wrapped your legs around his middle and your arms around his neck, reveling in his warmth.

Your nails scraped against his back, creating scarlet streaks as he kept rocking you into bed. Azriel felt like he was in heaven.

Azriel pumped into you, holding eye contact as he remembered everything he had learned, everything that allegedly made a woman go crazy. He brought down his thumb to circle your clit knowing it was something a lotta women liked. He just didn’t expect you to go absolutely stupid on him as he did.

You were moaning and writhing in pleasure, lost in the sensations Azriel was eliciting from you. He couldn't help but think that you looked much prettier than all those actresses with their over-the-top performances. Your pleasure felt real and genuine, and he loved seeing you like that, completely lost in the moment.

“mm-my goddd — harder, please,” you whined, nails digging into his back.

Azriel didn't dare to close his eyes, his gaze never leaving yours as he whispered about your beauty. A pressure built up in both of you, a shared desire that seemed to consume the room.

Azriel never swore. He thought it was a disgusting way for people to express themselves, and that only people who couldn’t use their words had to resort to it but he was breaking his own rule. You felt too good.

“You’re gorgeous, so fucking beautiful” he moans, hips thrusting at an unforgiving pace as you finally reached your high, moaning loudly, nails dragging across his back.

“Fuck, gon’ cum.” he panted, spilling his cum into your cunt. Azriel gave his final slow thrusts before he was pulling out of you, letting his cum seep out.

Azriel slumped next to you, eyes shut as he rolled onto his side, his face nuzzling into the crook of your neck as he caught his breath. You released gentle sighs, snuggling closer to him, feeling completely at ease in his embrace.

“Did you… finish? Was it any good?” he asked as he kissed your neck tenderly

“Yeah, I came, like, really hard! You did a super good job, Azzie!! Totally the best i’ve ever had!” you said giddly as you crushed him in a hug

Azriel chuckled softly at your enthusiastic response, his lips trailing kisses along your neck. “I'm glad I could make you feel good, next time, I want to eat your pussy,” he murmured casually, returning your hug warmly.

Your eyes widened as your body warmed at his sudden and wish.

“Okay, only if i can ride,” you negotiated back with an exhausted smile.

Azriel nodded, pressing a tender kiss to your forehead before gently bringing you closer to him. He then reached for one of the nearby blankets and carefully wrapped it around you, ensuring you were snug and warm in his embrace.

You turned on the movie, snuggling close under the cozy blanket as it played softly in the background. With the comforting glow of the screen illuminating the room, you drifted off to sleep in each other's arms.

—

“So? Are you just going to sit there, Az?” Cassian asked, practically on the edge of his seat

Azriel took a sip of his drink, unfazed by Rhysand's scrutinizing gaze.

“Yeah, we did it. Yes, it was good. Now stop asking,” he said, his tone casual yet firm.

Rhys leaned forward eagerly, a playful grin spreading across his face.

“Oh, come on, Az! We need more details,” he urged, his curiosity piqued.

Azriel chuckled, shaking his head. “No, you fuckfaces don't. But thanks for the tips. We had a hell of a good time,” he replied, his tone carrying a playful edge as he stood up and left them with their jaw dropped.

“Did he just swear? Am I dreaming?” Cassian asked bewildered, looking over to Rhys with raised eyebrows.

“He did,” Rhys confirmed with a chuckle, raising his glass in a mock toast.

🏷️: @ithan-holstroms-girl @whatdoyxumean @honeybeeboobaa @to-be-written @sidthedollface2 @stasiereads @andrewgarfield2022 @amara-moonlight @thescooby-gang @linoisqt @mischiefmanagers @tortured-artists @dwlyniii @scooobies @harryshoobies69 @caroline-books @kalulakunundrum @meshelleexplosionmurder @danikamariewrites @clairebear08 @redbleedingrose @jeannineee @rowaelinsdaughter @nocasdatsgay @v3lv3tf0x @liati2000 @teenageeggscissorslawyer @impossibelle @stonerpersona @dreamlandreader @djaaaa @callmeblaire @thelov3lybookworm @polli05927 @ahitsalyssa @evergreenlark @thegirlintheshadows101 @saltedcoffeescotch @acourtofladydeath @acourtofwhatthefuck @readychilledwine @daycourtofficial @azriels-shadowsinger @sapphicmsmarvel @hungryforbatboys @justasillylittlegoofyguy @luvmoo @emryb @meritxellao @mochibabycakes @artists-ally @azzieslittlebunny

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pirateprincessblog · 9 months

Text

Strawberry Mocha

𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐫.: your favorite café has a new barista, and he seems oddly familiar, especially when you see his hands move when he prepares your favourite beverage 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: jung wooyoung x reader, ft yunho 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 24.7k 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬: barista!wooyoung, student!reader, camboy!wooyoung, virgin!reader, hopelesslyinlove!yunho 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬: masturbation, mutual masturbation, sexting, public oral, public fingering, blindfold, slight bondage, toys, edging

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: swearing, v-card loss, angst on yunho's side 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: pussy drunk wooyo idk man also i imagine wooyo as bouncy wooyo here with that hot ass hair purr but make it oreo like he had it in aotm

𝐃𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐫: 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐨𝐟 𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫s 𝐢𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐰𝐚𝐲.

nsfw link(s): one

anastasya wants to chat! click here to see one new message.

"hello, gorgeous. want to see my pussy?" - tina, less than 10 km away.

luciano is more than ready to show you the 8th world wonder.

"close. close. close." your words are synchronized with the clicking of your mouse. with each minute passing, each click is getting more aggressive.

sick and tired of all the sex ads interrupting your studying over an illegally found textbook, you bury your head into your pillow. your back hurts from laying on your stomach for hours, but it is the only position that helps you with period cramps. the laptop makes a noise again, one you've heard enough of for the last few hours.

"i really don't want to fuck you, nick." you whine, clicking at the x in the corner of the new ad. when it opens three new tabs, all you can do is groan and close the laptop. you have an exam tomorrow, today is your first day of the period, which means tomorrow it's going to be worse, and to make things better, you are bombarded with photos of nude men and women, with attached locations, chat boxes and quotes. you feel sick.

yet again, you have just a little more of this lesson left, and if you could manage to spend so many hours fighting the virus bots, you can do it for ten more minutes. all out of motivation and will to live, you turn the laptop back on. the screen brightness almost blinds you, you forget how dark it has become and how bright your screen is. your eyes skim over the words, your brain so focused on focusing, that you forget to focus. you are frustrated, in pain, your hair is so greasy you could model it like clay, and your are nails half bitten off.

three minutes until your sleeping schedule starts, and five more long paragraphs to read. taking a deep breath, you click the arrow to scroll. as if the laptop is mocking you, it delivers you another message.

wooyoung (23), offers both mental and physical relief. check it out!

the ad flashes across the whole screen, the x not even visible on this one. you don't feel anything anymore. you've gone completely numb. accepted your fate. this will be your reminder to not study the last day ever again. you stare at the pink letters, then the picture on the side of it. it shows a young man, and oddly enough, not all oiled up and naked on it. it is a selfie, and in it he lays on the bed in the same position as you. how odd, to put a normal and clothed person on a sex ad.

"fuck it."

you drag the arrow over the highlighted letters, sighing. months, maybe even a whole year spent without a sexual contact. you didn't crave it. nothing in real life turned you on. maybe you didn't pay enough attention. maybe you've overgrown simple flirting and poor tries of having one night stands at parties. maybe all those young adult fantasy books on your shelves have raised your standards. looking back at the things that used to get you going makes you cringe. you've evolved from poorly acted out porn videos, to pages full of dark haired morally grey characters, blindfolds, leather gloves, candle wax, and whatnot.

you have yet to try out anything other than poor rubbings over the jeans you've received, not even orgasming. one night, three whole minutes of a drunk guy almost irritating your skin from harsh rubs, and a fake moan later, you start to wonder if you're the problem. proposing the idea of anything other than missionary and oral would make you the weird one, especially since you're a virgin. men here are shallow, and would rather jerk off to an amateur movie than try to match your standards and make the whole thing actually enjoyable.

the link you've clicked on doesn't open multiple tabs like the previous ones did. instead, it opens a single site, which first asks you to register and confirm your age. eager to see if the man in the picture was really the one offering such services, you log in with your google account, which unknowingly to you, used your picture and real name to set up the new account. your notes and pens are discarded on the floor, and your focus is on the man currently showing off his rings.

his hands are veiny, that is the first thing you notice. decorated with silver rings, nails neatly trimmed, with the pinky one painted black, and fingers oddly satisfying to look at. he brushes those same fingers through his hair, making it change colour for a split second. you notice that he is half blonde, which just makes you realize that sleep is not an option tonight. at least not yet.

"anyone want to open today's topic before i start?" he offers, scrolling through the comments.

you watch as people comment various topics and requests, the main one being for him to start touching himself already. for a sex cam, he does quite a lot of talking. maybe that's why you haven't left the site yet, but are staring at the way his teeth are biting his lip while his eyes focus on the bright screen.

"your friends are shaming you for having a threesome?" he reads out loud, then sighs. "they're probably virgins. or inexperienced girls who got fucked once then dumped. only they shame people for their sexual desires. they have no creativity at all. i can't imagine jerking off with just my hand anymore. feels bland. don't worry about them."

your fingers are quicker than your brain, and before you even register it, you hit send.

a soft laugh travels to your ears, and you just know it's because of your comment.

"you beg to differ?" he says, brushing his hair back again. he takes a moment to think. his rings shine under the dimmed lights, and you can't help but wonder how it would be to feel that cool sensation on your body.

you'd love to have him feel you up and down with this rings on, a cold contrast on your hot skin. you wouldn't budge if he were to put that hand against your neck, giving it light squeezes just enough to give you a thrill. you'd even let him do it in front of that camera of his, make all of these thirsty girls jealous because you're the one moaning his name. shit, you're really into him. or rather this whole situation. and he hasn't done a single sexual gesture.

"a virgin on my page. interesting." the young man hums, his eyebrows scrunched. "isn't life boring as a virgin? i mean, what do you do?"

i study, you're quick to reply again.

"i meant sexually, love." he laughs, somewhat fondly.

was it that obvious that you're a virgin? your cheeks feel hot, and you now wish to exit the page. but by doing that, you'll just prove him right. he'll make fun of you too, just like he did to those friends. you sigh. he doesn't know who you are, so it doesn't matter. you'll be honest, and maybe he'll give you a solution.

using hands isn't that boring

"ever tried a toy? or a person?"

tried a person. got disappointed.

"ah, what a shame. let me guess, gave you blisters from rubbing?"

oh just how did you know?

"poor thing," he coos, "if you had come to the right person, i would've given you just what you need."

the words come out raspy, and there's a sudden change on his face. you wonder if you said anything wrong. if he was thinking about banning you. but instead, a notification pops up in the corner of your screen.

wooyoung has sent you a message request!

oh.

"anyways, let's move on. am i in a hotel? ah, no. i recently moved houses, this will be my new filming room now. not as special as the previous one, but i need time to decorate it."

he keeps talking, eyes glancing at his phone every now and then, as if expecting you to answer right away. you are shaking, your head feels dizzy, and you find it hard to swallow. was he going to tell you privately to fuck off of his site? how embarrassing that would be. you wouldn't ever recover.

wooyoung has sent you a message request!

two of them now, yet you're still debating whether or not to exit and delete your browsing history. it won't hurt to look. you don't have to reply. you can just take a peek, leave him on read, and fuck out of there. it's not like he will see you on the street tomorrow. he could be on a whole different continent, and yet, he could be five houses away from you. either way, you're feeling vulnerable. those messages are either humiliation, or something entirely different. both of those make you feel uneasy.

then again, this is the only thing that sparked something inside you in these few months of feeling burnt out from reading all that erotica. the only difference is, this is happening. really happening. a whole man is in your chat, while he has an ongoing sex stream with more than five thousand people watching and commenting. and so when you say fuck it, you mean it.

wooyoung: ever tried an innocent soft little pillow?

wooyoung: guaranteed, feels better than a horny teenage boy.

your breathing is shallow, and you fear that you might collapse. his next message contains a phone number, and then, you watch him drop the phone on his bed. his focus is now on the camera, and the way his eyes stare into the lens, makes you feel as if they're searching for you. deciding to further test the waters, and see if he is just trying to have a little fun, or if he really has taken an ounce of interest in an inexperienced watcher, you send a text back.

he stops mid sentence, glancing at his phone. he fails to hide a smirk, and you're not sure whether it is the one of amusement or mocking.

am I, a boring old virgin, good enough for a pillow?

being a virgin doesn't mean you're all that innocent. quite the opposite, in your friend group, you are the one who leaves them all shocked when you speak of your desires. yet, who guarantees that this guy can accomplish what you want? they all want to "rock your world", show you how "good" it can be, until the make-out session is over and they come in their pants from simple dry humping. and you? who cares about if you came. your job is done the moment they come to their senses, and you are left to your growing disappointment in young men your age again.

wooyoung: does the boring old virgin know how to use one? perhaps some assistance is needed?

you swallow. you've never used anything other than your hand before. for someone with such a creative mind, you were quite a bore when it comes to pleasing yourself. you were used to your own touch, and you desperately needed someone else to fill the spot.

you glance at the screen. he is now holding something in his hand. it's clear, and long, and you're not sure if you've seen that before. your mind doesn't get enough time to form a thought, because he sticks two fingers in his mouth. he swirls the tongue around them, coating them until they're shimmering like the rings. sensually slow, he takes them out, making sure to give the camera a dreamy gaze. he turns the gadget towards the camera, and just when you figure out what it is, he brings his wet fingers to the hole in the toy. he circles the entrance, causing your tights to squeeze. you are so mesmerized by the way he slowly inserts his fingers into the toy, that you don't realize you are almost panting.

"need to prepare her for me." he says, giving it a few slow pumps.

you can almost feel his fingers on your cunt, he is just that good at this. each pump of his fingers sends a wave of butterflies straight to your abdomen. it's so painful, to be horny on your period. otherwise you would've came twice by now.

"think I've prepared her enough?"

comments are flooded with positive feedback, and the young man smirks. he readjusts the camera, and sits with his back against the bed frame. he wears short sweatpants, perfectly showing off his not so humble size. he takes his sweet time to undo the knot on them, driving the watchers (including you) insane. he laughs at the comments, and decides it's enough teasing.

"for all the virgins here tonight," he says, then glances at his phone.

finally, he pulls his sweats down. his cock find its place in his hand, not allowing you to take a better look. wooyoung gives himself a few slow strokes, head falling against the headboard as he does so. he hums, licking his fingers and pressing them against his cock. you have stopped breathing. his gaze is fixed on the lens, eyelids half closed, and breathing shallow. your eyes watch his movements, carefully documenting and engraving them in your brain so you can replay them for the next few weeks. he takes the toy, sliding it on his cock. your mouth drops when you see the absolute relief on his face, followed by an eyeroll and a deep moan. you figure that the toy serves him as a fake pussy. why a fake one, when he can have anyone he likes? his watchers must get jealous. you would be too, if you saw someone so hot that gives you such attention fuck someone else.

a few strokes in, and he is already bucking his hips upwards and moaning. wet noises travel to your ears, paired with multiple curses and sighs. suddenly, he sits up, grabbing two pillows from behind his back. he places a pillow on the mattress, the toy, then another pillow on top of all that. you almost gasp when you see him spit on his fingers, rubbing his cock, then slowly insert it into the toy. he grabs the pillows, then plunges his hips into it. he groans, and stays inside for a moment. then, he starts off with slow thrusts.

you've read so much about rough sex, that you didn't even think about the sensual side of it. how good it must be to savour every caress, every lick and every stroke. to actually take your time, like he is taking it with a simple toy. to be at his mercy for hours, what you'd give. helpless, deprived of senses, only him and you. you feel your heartbeat slow down as he stares into the lens, hips moving with such pace that has your stomach almost exploding.

overwhelmed by the situation unfolding in front of you, you shut your laptop down. you see your face on the black screen; cheeks puffed, pupils dilated, and mouth dry. fuck, what was that? did you just watch live porn? and did you interact with the person doing it? you check the time, and with a loud groan, you place the laptop on the floor and roll over. you have so little time to get some quality sleep, yet you're wide awake. your studying is nowhere near done, and you just know that a prayer won't save you tomorrow. from the exam, nor from the cramps.

surprisingly, you passed the exam. everything you've read last night managed to stick to your brain, despite the crazy situation that had interrupted you. you have already forgotten about it. when you woke up, it all seemed like a part of your dream. a very real dream. today, you didn't have time to think about it. your hair is a greasy mess, and an oversized hoodie hangs from your shoulders, covering your bloated stomach. you've dreamed about a cup of your favorite pink beverage all morning, and when the clock finally showed a sweet number four, you were the first one to run out of the building. your phone lays forgotten at the bottom of your backpack, mind too cluttered with the upcoming projects and cramps.

the coffee shop isn't as busy for a monday morning, and the timing is just right. you cannot stand anymore, so when you get next in line, you are relieved. you take a good look at the menu above the counter, happy that you've made it through such a tough morning.

"good day, how can i help you?"

your smile fades as quick as it arrives. you feel like all the blood in your body has pooled down in your feet, making it hard to move.

"oh, do you need to sit down? you look very..." the voice pauses, and you can feel an intense gaze on your face, before he continues "...pale."

you drop your gaze, slowly, feeling like the person is going to catch on if you do it in normal pace. right in front of you, stands the man who you watched fuck a pillow last night. he is very much real, not a fruit of your imagination combined with exhaust. he smiles sweetly, showing you towards a chair. you don't move. instead, you blink, and let your mouth run.

"i'll have the strawberry mocha please."

he scrunches his eyebrows, but begins to tap on his screen anyway.

"whipp-?"

"with whipped cream, thanks. just, uh, extra syrup. and pearl sprinkles."

he raises an eyebrow, looking at you suspiciously. you can't tell if it's because of your relation to his odd interaction last night, or simply because you are acting weird.

"that'll be-"

you interrupt again, pressing your credit card to the gadget near the cash register, eyes not leaving the wooden surface. with behaviour like this, he will soon figure out why you are acting this way. you must stop, before you embarrass yourself more.

"name?"

"anna," you blurt out, just in case.

"right," you think you hear him scoff, and if it weren't for your brain slowing down with each second, you would've asked what's so funny.

once he types in everything he needs, he points towards an empty section, gesturing you to take a seat. sitting on that chair has never been more uncomfortable for you. you feel like you sat on thorns, and no matter how you adjust, you are just making annoying creaking noises.

you glance at the man behind the counter. a lump forms in your throat as your eyes scan his hand movements. he is invested in the shaker, fingers skillfully moving it in the air. your concentration gets stolen by his face, loose strands falling on it eyes focused on the drink, and eyebrows scrunched. even if he was a aware of you staring, (you doubt he didn't notice), he doesn't spare you a glance. he pours the drink into the iced cup, spilling a little on his fingers and on the counter. you follow his hand, which takes a straw and drops it into the cup, and then moves towards his mouth. your breath stops in your throat, and your eyes almost drop on the floor.

he sticks the two wet fingers in his mouth, slowly, and looks up right at you. he catches you red handed, or better said, red cheeked. you're flustered by his hot, unprofessional, but hot move. and as if that wasn't enough, he has the audacity to maintain eyecontact as he brings you your beverage, a slight smirk dancing on his lips.

"your drink, anna."

"thank you, woo-" you freeze.

idiot. fucking idiot.

"ah, you managed to read my name tag."

he saves you, perhaps unknowingly. the amount of attention that his hands are gaining from you should be concerning, yet you still can't stop admiring those strangely attractive veins peeking from under his rolled up sleeve, going all the way to the fingers which are fixing the name tag.

"wooyoung, your shift ended ten minutes ago!" the voice behind the counter calls.

"oops." he snickers, then makes his way towards the counter, allowing you to take a look at his back too.

the thin white shirt is a little tight on his body, just enough to show off quite a few lines on his back. funnily enough, even though you've seen him naked, something about those clothes giving you a teaser is much more of a button pusher for you. the anticipation and buildup were always more interesting to you than the actual thing they lead to.

you laugh at yourself. as if any of that is going to happen to you any time soon. deciding you've spent enough time out of your comfy apartment today, you decide to put a lid on your coffee and leave the shop. at the door, someone tries to get out before you, but once they realize it's a bit tight for both, two hands gently find their way on your waist. a strong scent of jasmine washes over your senses, warm and firm body pressed against your back.

"oh, watch it, love."

and with that, you stand on the entrance, watching the familiar man run off to his car, the barista apron resting over his shoulder.

wooyoung: disconnected mid show?

wooyoung: was it too overwhelming for your first time?

wooyoung: shame, i put my all into that orgasm, only to see you disconnected long ago

you are rolling in your bed, listening to the messages that are being read out loud by your very best friend. disbelief evident in his voice, he reads, over and over. you haven't yet replied, and having an actual encounter with him today didn't make it easier for you to do so.

"he's, like, a hundred percent real?"

"he very much is."

"are you sure? because ai is getting very scary these days-"

"yunho." you sit up, face inches away from him. "i stood this close to him."

the tips of his ears turn red, and you manage to catch a single glance he sends towards your lips. you ignore it, trying to convince yourself that if you do not notice, it will not happen. his behaviour will stop.

"he is very much real."

"o-okay," he stutters, turning his head sideways as to avoid being caught staring again, "so what now?"

"i don't know. what is there to do? he's just some porn guy, and i was just an accidental watcher. nothing is going to happen."

"and-"

your phone pings, as if knowing what yunho was about to ask.

"-the messages?"

"i'll just..." you stall, glancing at the phone and trying to see the notification, "...delete it all."

the man in front of you scoffs, believing in your words as much as you. he gets off your bed, picking up his jacket along the way.

"i'll see you in class tomorrow."

you only nod, feeling guilt pooling up at the bottom of your stomach. yet, as soon as you hear the door shut, you grab your phone. indeed, messages from wooyoung are taking up your phone screen.

wooyoung: out of curiosity, you didn't happen to try the pillow thing?

wooyoung: need to borrow mine?

you bite your lip, and your eyes fall on the pile of pillows yunho used to make himself comfortable.

i haven't tried it. and no, i have four of them.

wooyoung: shame. bet they'd love to be suffocated between your legs.

you choke on your spit, eyes skimming over the message multiple times.

that one of your fetishes? being suffocated with female tights?

wooyoung: you have no idea.

a few minutes pass,and you are thinking of various replies to send to him. do you keep talking to him? do you start flirting? is this considered flirting? if yes, are you doing a good job? a few more minutes pass before your phone dings again, wooyoung interrupting your thinking process.

wooyoung: well, i see that you're extremely disinterested in my tries of communication, so i shall just leave you be. hope my actions and i weren't overwhelming for you. if that's the case, my sincere apologies. you're always welcome to my lives though.

wooyoung: oh, and good luck studying!

"no, no," you whisper, seeing the online tag under his name disappear. your lack of communication with actual confident men and your awkwardness in general made him back off. it all felt too real to be true, but it was real. and you let it slip away. your only chance at gaining experience and living out your fantasies.

i'm not disinterested!

shit, you shouldn't have sent that exclamation mark. he will think you are desperate now. he doesn't reply, nor does the tag under his name reappear. you wait, minutes, half an hour, just rolling on the bed and switching between apps, trying to see if he at least went online. maybe he only read it from his notifications, and that wasn't enough to make him come back. you pick up the last few ounces of desperation you have left, and grab a pillow. you sit on it, crushing it between your legs, and pull your oversized hoodie just enough to cover your bottom and expose your thighs. you have discarded the pants the moment you entered the house, already used to walking around in yunho's old comfy boxers. you snap a picture, once, then twice, until you are satisfied with the angle and all the details that he may not even notice; like your chipped nail polish or the messy notes from yunho's studying.

instantly, wooyoung comes back online. he begins typing, then stops. he types again, and stops once more. you are biting your nails, regretting already. now that he knows how desperate you are, he will lose interest in you. you would too if you were him. you zoom into the picture, trying to figure out if anything is wrong with it.

wooyoung saved the picture in the chat!

oh.

wooyoung: fuck, that's

wooyoung: wow

wooyoung: those are the smoothest and softest thighs i've ever seen in my life

wooyoung: you know when you look at something and you know the texture of it? i bet i could just sink between them just like that pillow

wooyoung: could you ride that for me, angel?

the nickname sends arrows to your core, and you gulp. he knows his way with words, and you are so here for it. you can feel yourself dripping, and not from what you're supposed to drip from. your horny levels hit the sky on your period, and oh, how convenient that all of this is happening on the second day of it. he doesn't have to know, you could keep him hooked, until your period is done. but then what? what guarantees that he will not lose interest once he has a little fun with you with all the dirty talk?

your hands work against your brain, and soon enough, you are grinding on the soft material, one hand holding the phone and the other one covering your mouth so that no noises come out of it. if it feels good with so many layers on you, how good can it feel with your bare clit rubbing against it?

wooyoung: atta girl

wooyoung: feel good?

you only moan at the praise he delivers you, hips speeding up the pace.

yes, you manage to quickly type in.

wooyoung: can you type and work it? is it hard for my good girl to multitask?

you set the phone aside, focusing entirely on the object between your legs. you roll your hips, dedicated to chasing the sweet pleasure that has abandoned you for so long. at the memory of his skilled hips last night, the orgasm washes over you so quickly. his choice of words significantly sped up the process, and you aren't to complain. you take your time to calm your breathing, before taking the phone in your hands again. it was new, and different, but most importantly, fucking good.

the euphoria doesn't last long, the look of horror replacing the one of pure bliss on your face. right under wooyoung's message stood yours.

voice message sent.

it is you shamelessly whimpering and grunting, mere four seconds of it, yet enough to make wooyoung save it in the chat.

wooyoung: is it christmas already?

wooyoung: i keep getting present after present. what did i do to deserve it?

wooyoung: i better go fix the problem you've created.

wooyoung has sent a picture! tap to view.

the picture is dark, but there is just enough lighting for you to see his defined v-line and the bulge in his sweatpants. you bite the inside of your cheek, suppressing a smile. you made someone horny. not just anyone, but wooyoung, a porn creator. he has surely seen lots of things, how come a fully clothed picture and a four second audio could get him in the mood?

you have saved the picture in the chat!

in the next few days, you ask yunho to pick up the beverage from the coffee shop while you grab something to eat. he is happy that you started including breakfast in your day, and isn't yet aware that you are only avoiding the man he also knew about. perhaps wooyoung worked different shifts, and they didn't have an encounter yet? it's a bit cruel towards yunho, but you can't make yourself go in there. not until you've grown some dignity.

today, yunho isn't here. he has only answered to your message, saying that he has a flu, and that he will be resting for a day or two. which leaves you to getting the coffee on your own. you run from the rain, your umbrella broken and swimming away somewhere down the road. you would've picked it up and threw it away, really, if that lighting wasn't so close to you and you started running for your life. you are soaked, the hoodie stuck to your skin and the shorts uncomfortable and heavy. you hurriedly enter the coffee shop and exhale, the warmth of the place caressing your cold cheeks. you notice the place is empty, and the chairs are neatly tucked under the tables. the surfaces have been freshly wiped, and no menus or decorations were on them.

you approach the counter, ready to grab your beverage and leave before you make a bigger mess. nobody is there, the syrups and coffee cans are neatly placed on the shelves, not a drop of water visible on the counters. your eyes notice a little board, with pink letters on it.

due to sudden illness of two out of three workers, we are forced to work short hours this week. thank you for understanding!

underneath, you see that they work until four in the afternoon. you check the time, and upon noticing that it is just two minutes before four, you sigh. you turn around, ready to leave and rid the poor worker of trouble after they already prepared the place for closing.

"oh, i'm terribly sorry, i didn't notice you!"

the voice makes your blood run cold, and once again, you find yourself frozen in spot. only this time, you are all alone with him. no people surrounding you. just him, you, and the crazy weather outside.

"please, feel free to order. you have a minute and a half to place it!"

you turn around, eyes locking with brown ones. he is smiling sweetly, pointing towards the menu above his head.

"i don't want to bother you. you've cleaned the whole place and-" your eyes drop on the see through shirt hugging his body "-you've already taken your apron off."

"luckily, my boss is sick too so she can't give me crap about it. i can make your drink without it."

you make your way towards the counter again, eyes skimming over the menu, knowing damn well what you're going to order. you just have to buy yourself time so you can calm down. the scent of jasmine is taking over your senses, creeping into your mind and bringing back memories you wish so hard to forget so you can move on with your life. he is tugging you into the void, and you have nothing to get you out of there. you haven't heard from him since the day you rode the pillow for him, and you didn't have time to watch any of his lives.

"well, then. i'll have a strawberry mocha."

"ah, so it's your usual then."

"yes. extra syrup. and the pearl sprinkles, please."

"and whipped cream, yes", he types in the order, then looks behind. "you know, we have some strawberry cupcakes that didn't sell today due to the weather. would you like one? on the house!"

you hesitate, not wanting to waste his time. he could be home by now, doing something important. like filming himself. or texting you after you've left him on seen. or better said, saved.

"i really don't want to waste your time."

"you're not wasting my time, trust me. besides, i'd rather stay here a little more until my phone finishes charging. i don't want to get stuck in that weather outside with no battery."

he sees you hesitate and eye up the pink pastries, desire obvious in your eyes. he chuckles, then brings the whole tray on the counter.

"tell you what," he grabs the items needed for your beverage, not breaking eye contact with you, "i'll make us two strawberry mochas, and we'll eat those cupcakes so they don't get wasted until the weather calms down. sound good?"

you gulp. the look on your face is a complete opposite of him, as well as your body language. he is relaxed, beaming with confidence, and has a smile on his lips. meanwhile, you are stiff, your face is blank, maybe even scared at the fact that you're gonna be alone with the man who made you cum without touching you. but when thunder echoes through the place, you agree.

it doesn't take him long to make them and bring them to your booth in the corner of the shop. the smell of strawberries is the only thing keeping you sane at the moment. he sits across from you, shirt half unbuttoned, as if it's the warmest day of the spring outside. he doesn't have a care in the world. he silently enjoys the cupcake, occasionally glancing at you. you are slow with yours, careful not to stain your clothes with the pink icing.

"want to try?"

you look over at him. he brings his glass closer towards you, and aligns the straw with your lips.

"isn't it the same?"

"well, no." he laughs awkwardly. "try it, trust me."

you try taking the glass from him, but he is persistent in holding it for you. you wrap your lips around the straw, eyes locked with his dark ones.

"atta girl." he hums.

you swear you could orgasm right there on the spot. you pull at the liquid, cheeks hollowing and creating a perfect scene for him. he is dead serious, the smirks and chuckles long left behind the counter. the moment your tongue tastes alcohol, you push the drink away from you, creamy liquid dripping from your lips.

"fuck, is that whiskey?"

you wipe your top off with your sleeve, not yet realizing wooyoung's intense gaze on your lips.

"yes." he replies, as if it's the most normal thing in the world.

"god, why?" you finally lick the cream off your lips, ridding wooyoung of more fantasies forming in his head.

"it's good. why, don't like alcohol?"

you never really did. sure, you drank some tequilas, and a little gin of course, but not to the point to get drunk or actually go for a full round or two.

"i'm actually quite a virgin when it comes to alcohol."

the words are left hanging in the air, silence wrapping you both up. one might think that you knew exactly what you were doing with the choice of words, but you were plain dense. and wooyoung was here for it. he was whipped for all the innocent sides you were unknowingly showing him, but lord forbid he tells you anything. otherwise, you might stop talking at all.

"you can come over for classes if you want..." he brings the glass back in front of him, a smirk dancing on his lips, "...anna."

"yeah, i don't want any alcohol after my real classes, thank you."

the conversation stops, the only sound being quiet chewing and the rain pouring. wooyoung takes his time to think, and so do you.

"that yunho guy-"

"what do you do in your free time-"

you start at the same time. yunho? how does he know his name?

"you go first," you offer, unwrapping another cupcake.

"that yunho guy, he orders a single strawberry mocha with extra syrup and pearl sprinkles every day when you don't come. whipped cream too, of course. for you, assuming?"

you nod, poking those same sprinkles with your straw. yunho has been a little more absent in your life since this whole thing has started, and you feel bad to admit that you didn't really miss him. you weren't using him for coffee or homework, of course. you still like to occasionally chat with him, just not like before. especially since his feelings are coming more to the surface.

"yes, for me."

wooyoung hums, not asking further questions.

"so uh, wooyoung, right? you're new here?" you opt for a different question, seeing that he didn't remind you to finish the previous one.

"jung wooyoung, yes. i moved from los angeles recently, didn't find my luck there."

"ah, what do you do?"

"porn."

and just like that, the conversation stops. at least from your side. your head hangs low over your paper cup, fingers now playing with the cupcake wrap as you feel his gaze on you.

"are we going to act like you don't know what that is?"

"i know what it is," you stutter, fingers ripping the wrap apart and playing with bits from nervousness, "i just don't quite, you know, fit in that area."

"you sure fit in that night."

you choke on your spit, eyes shooting up to look at him. his elbow rests on the desk, supporting his head, while his other one plays with the empty cup. his finger grazes the corners, slowly circling it, as if trying to help you remember that night and the way the did it to the toy. your mouth goes dry, and you feel at his complete mercy.

"how-" you clear your throat, the roughness of it a dead giveaway that he caught you, "-how did you, uh, know?"

"you're telling me you saw nothing wrong with entering the coffee shop with that hoodie on, knowing full well i work here?"

you look down at the hoodie you're wearing. how fucking ironic, that it's the same hoodie you posed in for him. you really are that dense.

"i should get going."

"i can drive you home. you're not thinking of walking in this weather?"

him and you? in such a small space? for such a long time? what if you blurt out more stupid things, as if you haven't embarrassed yourself enough today? you wouldn't blame him if he left you on the side of the road.

the train of thoughts is interrupted by your name rolling off his lips so sweetly, dripping milk and honey. your actual name, not the fake one you gave him.

"yes?"

"i'm not camboy wooyoung now. i'm just wooyoung, your friendly barista. and when i say i can and want to drive you home, i mean it. no funny business. the last thing i want to do is make a loyal costumer uncomfortable."

it doesn't take long for him to clean up the table and grab his phone from the charging station. you patiently wait by the door, ears and cheeks warm from the unfamiliar situation you've found yourself in. you follow his commands, such as coming behind the counter and slipping through the staff door so that the cameras don't catch you. you squeeze into the pantry, waiting for him to lock the doors one by one.

"so, that yunho guy didn't take your virginity yet?" he blurts out, as if it is the most normal question he could ask.

"what?"

"well," he turns around, facing you, "he is your boyfriend after all, isn't he?"

"that's not quite- oh-" you are pressed into the corner, with wooyoung blocking the way out. he puts his hands on the wall, trapping you between his arms and forcing you to look at him.

"does your boyfriend know that you watch filth and film yourself for another man?"

"he isn't-"

"does he know that his innocent little girlfriend is alone with that same man inside an empty coffee shop, away from everyone?"

you fail to answer, instead opting for silence. your eyes fall on his exposed chest, fingers yearning to touch. you feel a hand under your chin, gently lifting your head up so that you can look at him again. you see pure desire in his eyes, and now you know exactly what the authors mean when they say that his eyes darkened with lust. you are witnessing it first hand, and now that you are finally here, you are not acting the way you did in your mind.

he brings his face close to yours, his loose hair strands tickling your cheeks. his breathing is shallow, much like yours, and when he slowly presses his lips against yours, you breathing stops completely. he holds your chin in his hand, thumb gently rubbing your cheek, while his other hand finds its place on your hip. he pulls your body into his, and ever so gently bites down on your bottom lip.

your first normal kiss ever. with the man you watched masturbate on a crucial studying night. he pulls away, just enough to move your hair out of the way.

"am i making you uncomfortable?" he asks, concern taking over his features.

"no," you whisper, not trusting your voice.

"you sure?"

"please keep kissing me." you look up at him, and wooyoung swears that he has never seen such big pleading eyes in his entire life. just how can he deny you such a thing, when you asked him so sweetly and innocently?

wooyoung loses control, and lets his heart take over. his hands grab your waist, picking you up and seating you on a nearby surface, knocking some cups and cutlery over in the process. his lips are pressed against yours again, moving slowly until you get used to it. your hands hesitantly wrap around his neck, fingers playing with the hair on it. wooyoung exhales into your lips, absolutely whipped for your little gestures.

you are soaking wet. you hope he doesn't feel it, considering he has your legs wrapped around his waist and your cunt pressed against his firm torso. with each kiss he so generously delivers you, a new batch of butterflies gets released in your stomach, making you feel all giggly and excited. he smells absolutely heavenly, and the way his tongue is grazing your lips is driving you mad. his fingers press into your thigh, feeling the flesh and lightly squeezing it. so he really does have a thigh fetish.

you whine when he pulls away from you, only to attach his lips to your neck. he drags his tongue down the side of your neck, to your collarbone. his hands sneak under your hoodie, lingering on your bare skin for a moment. you realize he is waiting for a sign to keep going, so you help him raise your hoodie right under your chest.

"should i stop?"

you didn't quite picture him as a man who would ask for consent multiple times. but then again, he is a man. not a boy. and just like he said: right now, he isn't camboy wooyoung. he is your friendly barista wooyoung. a particularly touchy friendly barista wooyoung. not that you're complaining.

"angel?"

absolutely lost in the way he is looking at you, you fail to answer. you feel so small in his arms, and so inexperienced when it comes to simple kissing. god, what if he wants something more right away?

"i need to know you're comfortable. i won't do anything if-"

you stop him by taking his hand and placing it on your breast. he gulps, gently squeezing the soft flesh. why does he seem so nervous? doesn't he fuck multiple people in a span of a month?

he rubs your tense buds, sending little shockwaves to your core. as soon as you lift the hoodie to your collarbones, wooyoung is quick to take your bud into his mouth. he teases with the tip of his tongue, making you twitch and yelp in his grip. you aren't used to this type of pleasure. it's new, and intensive. you love it.

his other hand keeps up the pace his tongue has set, rubbing slow circles on the sensitive buds. you struggle with breathing, and your hands are reaching out to grab anything; the counter, his shoulders, his hair, the counter again, and so on. your head falls back, and the feeling of pure bliss pools in your stomach. you feel like you could orgasm any moment, yet it never happens. wooyoung switches between each bud, treating them both equally. a particularly breathy moan leaves your mouth, making wooyoung hum. he is pleased with the way you're responding to him, so jumpy and whiny while he feasts on your body.

when he pulls away, you see a string of saliva connecting his lips with your breast. you moan at the sight, feeling adrenaline running through your veins and waiting to explode somewhere in your body. wooyoung drops down on his knees, fingers hooked in the elastic band of your shorts.

"if i don't get crushed between your thighs right now, i don't think i'll live to see another day."

even from that position, he is emitting insane dominant energy, and you are just a marionette in his hands.

"please."

you raise your hips just enough to help him pull the shorts down, along with the panties. you are thankful that they are the new ones you had discovered this morning since buying them a month ago. though, they were ruined with your arousal anyway and wooyoung probably couldn't care less. but instead of tossing them aside, he raises them in front of his eyes, admiring them.

"that's so fucking adorable."

they are plain pastel panties, with a small row of lace on the top of it. you figure he is used to strings and thongs, and how new a normal set of panties must seem to him. wooyoung folds the panties, and stuffs them in his pocket. too taken aback by his action, you do not have time to react when he places your legs over his shoulders.

"you don't have to cum. i just want to show you how good it can be."

you mean you want to leave me yearning for your touch as if i am not desperate enough?

"is that alright? can i lick you until you pass out?"

he knows exactly which words drive you insane. as if he was living in your head since you discovered the first young adult fantasy book. you nod, then breathe in. the sudden lighting outside makes you aware of where you are. you are about to have your cunt devoured by none other than the new barista everyone around you is crushing on, in one of the staff rooms. soft café music is heard in the distance now that the rain has calmed down, and it is only adding up to the rather odd, but once in a lifetime situation you are in.

a flat, wet muscle presses against your folds, softly licking up your arousal and stopping at your clit. you try to close your legs at the new feeling of pleasure, but wooyoung is quick to grab your thighs and keep them apart just enough so he can get you used to the feeling. your legs shake as the tip of his tongue massages the tip of your clit, pure pleasure taking over your body and completely shutting your brain off. you are a whining mess, shaking in his arms, pulling at his hair, and whatnot. his eyes never leave your face, memorizing every eyebrow scrunch, every eyeroll, every moan and every hand movement. he is entirely mesmerized by your existence. he has never seen anyone let their guard down like this and put themselves at his complete mercy.

he switches between techniques, not yet allowing you to work up your orgasm. he figures you like circles with the tip of his tongue best, they have you being more vocal and squirmy in his hold. wooyoung then snakes his hands under your bottom, gently lifting your lower body so that your head and shoulders lay comfortably on the wooden surface. your hips are in the air, and your legs hang off his shoulders. you are confused by the position he has you in, until he dives into your cunt once more. you moan, fingers reaching to pull at his soft hair. this time he doesn't separate your thighs, but instead presses his face further into your arousal and squishes your flesh against his cheeks, licking every drop you have to offer him.

"wooyoung-" you whine, hips subconsciously grinding against his face.

"good, good girl." he hums, lips closing around your bud and sucking on it.

you clench, body tensing up upon feeling the orgasm approaching.

"fuck- fuck-" you whine, hands gripping the shelves above your head.

wooyoung slows his movements to the max, carefully sliding his tongue up and down your clit, driving you insane with the orgasm delay. you want to cum so bad, but everything feels too much, you are sweating so bad, and the position you are in is making you more vulnerable and sensitive.

"please, please, please, pretty please" you beg, voice already betraying you and cracking at the end.

wooyoung groans against your cunt, then moves away. you gasp with surprise. all the pleasure leaves your body, and you are now laying on the surface again. you support yourself on your elbows, enough to look at him and ask just why he stopped.

"prettiest cunt i've ever seen in my life." he caresses your skin above it.

"why-" you breathe out, "- why did you stop? i was so, so close-"

"i had to, angel. i don't want you cumming in a pantry on an uncomfortable surface."

you watch him lick his lips, disbelief evident on your face. he chuckles, picking your shorts up from the floor.

"panties?"

"i'll get you new ones."

were the panties really that interesting to him? wooyoung reaches for something above your head, pressing his lips on your forehead before grabbing paper towels. you are sensitive to his touch, feeling overstimulated and irritated even though you didn't orgasm. he patiently wipes you, then pulls your shorts up, not forgetting to caress your thighs along the way.

"come here." he instructs.

you sit up, feet swinging from the counter. the man in front of you pulls you in for a kiss, this time a short one.

"you did very good. i hope you get your real orgasm somewhere comfy."

he hopes? was this a farewell? he had his little fun with you, and now he is no longer interested?

"come on, the weather is calmer now. i'll still drive you home though."

and just like that, he proceeds outside, leaving you with thoughts for a few moments. you feel a little humiliated, and very vulnerable and exposed. still, you follow him outside, and get into his car. it is a neat car, that you notice. it smells like an ocean breeze, and he has a camera above his steering wheel.

"not for porn," he interrupts your thoughs.

you have forgotten about that side of him. in the moment, it seemed like he was just a normal guy who hooked up with you because he thinks you are cute. in reality, he is probably bored of all those skilled partners and wants something new, so he used you as a little project. you feel hurt, tears gathering in the corner of your eyes as you look out the window. you haven't spared him a single glance, scared that he might be pitiful towards you. that's the last thing you need.

"right, then left?" he asks, steering the wheel with one hand.

"yeah."

it doesn't take long before the car stops in front of a familiar building. you don't see yunho's car, and just then remember that he is sick and resting at home. wooyoung has clouded your mind so much that you don't have any other thoughts, only ones about him.

"thank you for sharing the cupcakes with me." he winks, then unlocks the door.

you aren't ready to say goodbye just yet. if you leave the car, will everything be back the way it was? him acting like he doesn't know you, and vice versa? are you supposed to go in there and order your strawberry mocha from him like it doesn't associate you with today's event?

"wooyoung?"

"yes, angel?"

you play with your fingers in your lap, deciding which words would be the best to make him stay in your life just a little longer.

"can you teach me?"

"teach you?"

"yes. you are so experienced, and i am just a dumb virgin with a big imagination."

he stops to think. he bites the inside of his cheek, and you mimic him.

"i'd destroy you."

you clench around nothing, hearing his raspy voice say such words to you. you know he means them, you saw him mean them. but you are up for it. anything, just to get another taste of him.

"i don't mind."

he sighs, smile still dancing on his lips. "just what are you?"

since the day you had your first orgasm denial, you have heard from him only once, and only because you sent the message first.

i'm not seeing those panties again, right?

wooyoung: nope.

okay

okay? okay??? you could at least put some effort into flirting. you are only pushing him away, instead of inching towards another meeting, this one preferably ending with an orgasm. the notifications about his lives were now regulars on your phone screen, and though you never quite watched them, you like to think he does it for you. slight jealousy has appeared, and you have to stop it before it spreads. but after all, you are the one that has gained his attention.

you decide to visit yunho. he has been sick for quite some time, and has been rarely answering your messages. you have prepared him his favourite soup, and bought his favorite chocolate bar.

"yunnie, you're alive!"

you jump into his arms, forgetting that he might still be weak from being sick. but he catches you effortlessly, a fond smile on his lips as he keeps your body close to him.

"feeling better?"

"almost." he replies, gently setting you down on the floor. "how have you been?"

"bored, honestly. i miss gossiping with you and getting yelled at by other students. oh, turns out mark did cheat on jenna!"

"knew it."

yunho makes his way to the kitchen to grab you a drink and put away the food you brought him, and you can't help but notice how buff he has gotten since the last time you saw him. he was probably well built before too, but you've never seen that man in anything other than oversized t-shirts and hoodies. right now, he is wearing one of those compressive exercise sleeveless tops, every bump and curve visible on his toned body. you notice how big his arms are, and just how tall he is.

you feel familiar warmth between your legs, and you have to sit down to stop any funny business. he is speaking, but all you can do is stare at the way his hands are handling the drinks. his hands are much bigger in comparison to wooyoung, and his physique overall is making you melt right there on his couch.

"so? sound good?"

you look up, pupils dilated and cheeks warm and red. he is confused by your sudden change in expression, before he realizes that you weren't even listening. he sighs, giving up on the weekend trip proposal.

"what is it with you?" the man hands you a glass of apple juice, along with a granola bar he knows you love to steal from his cupboard.

"nothing, why?" you reply too quickly.

he laughs, mixed confusion and amusement. he sits next to you, leaving a little space in between. the way he drops his head back on the backrest and manspreads isn't helping your situation. wooyoung has opened a door that cannot be closed anymore.

fuck, wooyoung.

"you know, i thought i was gonna die. my headache was so bad i heard thumping inside it."

"does it hurt now?"

"not really, no. but i do think i still have a little fever. can you check?"

you lean over on your knees, fingers gently moving his hair out of the way. upon reaching over for the thermometer from the coffee table, you slip between the couch cushions, making yunho jolt and grab your waist. you have to close your eyes for a moment, sensory overload getting the worst of you. your clothes suddenly feel so tight and itchy, his breathing is loud and right there in your ears, and his hands are burning on your skin over the fabric of your top.

"watch it, little one," he says.

you know he means the nickname as a sign of fondness towards you, but in the situation where you're acting like an animal in heat, it is doing wonders to you. knowing that he is big, much bigger than you, and calling you that is making your stomach boil.

you want to make a move. no matter how wrong it would be. you want to lean in and kiss him, make him feel you up and down, make him touch you right here on the couch, where you cuddled and watched movies since knowing each other.

"why are you looking at me like that?" his voice is suddenly raspy.

"like what?" you whisper, afraid of your infamous cracking tone.

"like you want to fuck me."

not far from truth. not exactly fuck, rather just have a little fun to get some heat out of you. his hands never leave your waist, instead pulling your body into his lap. you've been in this position many times, mainly being tickled and begging for mercy. now? you're ready to beg for his tongue on you.

"i-"

a familiar ringtone interrupts you, and you feel him tense up underneath.

"pick it up." he says, lazily looking at you through half closed eyelids.

"uh, yes," you stutter, reaching towards the table to grab your phone.

you almost faint seeing the name on your screen. you don't want to pick up. not now. any other time, yes. but right now? not quite convenient.

"go on, answer it." yunho encourages, not knowing the consequences of his action.

but you do it anyway. what is there to lose? lose yunho, gain wooyoung. and vice versa. how fucking evil of you. acting like a bitch in heat, listening to your pussy instead of your morals.

"yes?" you answer, breath hitching when yunho starts caressing your sides.

"hi, angel."

yunho's touching stops. he is now focused on the male voice coming from your phone, the name of the contact not visible from your hair.

"let me see you tonight? i'll take you out for a ride and a dinner."

"tonight?"

"yes. unless you have plans? i just got my motorcycle back from the auto mechanic, thought i'd show you there's thrilling stuff other than an orgasm denial in a public space."

yunho removes his hands completely from you, but lets you sit on his lap. you witness his face morph from flirty to mixed anger and disappointment, though he is trying very hard to hide it. the red tips of his ears are a dead giveaway, and you wish you could feel guilty.

"i have no plans. the ride sounds nice."

"good girl. i'll pick you up same place i dropped you off the other day, six o'clock?"

"sound good."

"good. i'll see you in around two hours then?"

"yes."

"chatty as usual, i see. i'll get you to talk tonight, no worries."

and with that, he hangs up. it is only then that yunho sits you on the couch next to him, while he stands up. you are numb to his reaction, excitement boiling in your veins in anticipation for tonight.

"do you enjoy hurting me?"

he shoots the first arrow through your heart.

"do you love seeing me suffer? do you enjoy bringing me to tears almost every time we meet?"

you have just uncovered something that has been cooking for a long time, and you know you are at fault. you just fail to feel wrong for it.

"it was fine at the beginning, you showed no signs of interest whatsoever. but now? the last month or two? you are driving me fucking insane."

when yunho starts swearing, you now it is bad.

"and to think that i'd actually have a chance. that you'd open yourself up for me so i can prove to you how well i can treat you. i deserve a global idiot award."

you don't speak. you let him rant, knowing that he would only get worked up more if you spoke. none of the things you had to say were comforting, so being silent was the better option.

"get the fuck out of my house."

it is the first time you see him so angry and aggressive. with full right. so you silently take your belongings, turning your back on him without a proper goodbye.

"and take this with you. i don't need anything from you." he shoves the box you had brought him into your hands.

he looks at you, teary eyed, fighting hard to keep them from spilling. you've never seen yunho cry. ever. of joy? yes. but almost shaking while holding back tears and biting his lips to keep them from quivering? perhaps it's just anger and frustration. either way, you fucked him up. and there's nothing you can do, other than leave him be.

"i hate you."

six o'clock rolls around quite quickly. you stand in front of a motorcycle, quite bigger than you imagined. wooyoung takes his helmet off, then steps off the motorcycle. he examines you, from head to toe, a little puzzled.

"skirt? odd choice, considering that i told you we were using a motorcycle."

wooyoung then pushes your hair back, removing it from your face and letting it fall on your back. he puts the helmet on you, a slight smile on his lips as he secures it.

"you're so fucking cute it hurts. look at you in your skirt and ballerinas."

your cheeks burn from his compliments, your thighs rubbing under the delicate material. wooyoung plays with the ends of the skirt, then slips his hands on your bare skin.

"want to sit at front?" he purrs, gaze gentle and lips turned into a fond smile.

"i actually never... well, this is my first time seeing it up so close."

"so i'm your first motorcycle too? i feel honoured."

"I don't really know how to... you know, anything."

whenever you're around him, your vocabulary becomes very limited and poor. for someone who reads so much, you're struggling quite good with putting together simple sentences.

"your only job is to sit still and be pretty for me. got it?" he cups your face with one hand and gently caresses your jaw with his thumb.

you nod, not trusting yourself with speaking while he touches you in such ways.

"come on now. hop on."

you are sat in front of him, hands trapped under his while gripping the handles. you are stiff, and even if he notices, he doesn't react. he starts off slow, enough to not scare you off immediately. at one point, right at the last traffic light before exiting the city centre, he speeds up, the front of the motorcycle hanging in the air for a split second, but enough to make you gasp and fall back against his chest. you hear him chuckle near your helmet, his hand coming to rest on your hip enough to comfort you.

"i got you," he says, squeezing your hip.

you now lay comfortably against him, enjoying the smooth ride on the highway. you are alone on the road, the opposite direction crowded due to people returning home from work. you haven't felt such thrill ever. the way wooyoung controls the vehicle and smoothly changes lanes, to the way he speeds up and does the wheelie again, this time a little higher, is making you see stars. you scream, but the playful way. adrenaline rushes through your veins, and you are laughing, having the most fun of your life. he isn't saying much, and even if he was, you don't hear him. you feel comfortable in his embrace, trusting him with your life on this silent road lit by neon lights on the fences.

you gasp when you feel his cold fingers on your thigh, the texture odd. you look down, only to see that his other hand has a leather glove on, and is slowly dipping between your legs. he slows down, enough to pay more attention to you without any danger nearby. the cold leather touches your folds near your panties that have slightly moved from the reckless driving. he realises the advantage, and proceeds to rip apart the fabric. you moan at the action, remembering all those worn out pages of your books describing men ripping women's bras and panties. and now, you're a character in that page, hopefully about to have an orgasm of your lifetime.

the cold leather touches you once again, a single finger toying with your soft bud, just enough to have you panting. your head falls on his shoulder, searching for support. he circles your clit, playing with the soft flesh and checking just how wet you are getting.

"want me to stop?" he asks, and when you shake your head, he dips his fingers below your clit.

you flinch at the unfamiliar feeling, not feeling the pleasure anymore. he notices, but tries to enter once again, this time more gentle and slow. you flinch again, your head no longer resting on his shoulder. he removes his hand, gripping the handle again as he slows the vehicle. he stops at the nearby platform, the neon fence lights shining on the stone table and two benches. he gets off the motorcycle, then helps you off too. your ripped panties hit the floor, your folds caressed by the highway breeze. he takes his helmet off, hanging it on one of the handles, then helps you with yours.

you are suddenly hyperaware of the situation you are in. far from the city and people, alone in the dark with still a complete stranger, with nothing but a top and a skirt on. nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. nobody to call.

"shit, hey." wooyoung cups your face, seeing sudden anxiety on it. "do you want me to drive you back?"

you take a moment to think. if he really meant evil, wouldn't he do something by now? he wouldn't comfort you, right? wouldn't offer you a ride back? or is this just a little foreplay for him before he does something to you and leaves you to rot here?

"i mean it," the man caresses your cheeks with his thumbs.

"no, i'm good. i think."

"i am not doing anything until i am sure of it."

"no, no, i really am. i just..." you trail, looking around, "...i am very new to all of this, that's all."

wooyoung takes both of your hands, guiding you towards the stone benches and table. he sits you on the table, and he sits on the bench in front of you. he doesn't break eye-contact with you as he rubs your thighs, slightly squishing the flesh for your comfort and for his pleasure. he doesn't go further though. he gives you time to relax, until your feet start slightly swinging off the table from boredom.

"tell me about yourself."

"like what?"

"anything. just talk. i want to hear you speak. you don't do much of it, and you have such a pretty voice, especially when you make those little moans."

your cheeks are burning, and you can only look down at your hands playing with the hem of your skirt.

"come on, tell me. what do you do except studying and riding pillows these days?"

you want to say that you don't ride pillows, but the playful smile on his lips is too sweet to ruin it.

"i read, like, a lot."

"what genre is your favorite?" the man's voice is now low and raspy, his hands now slowly sliding underneath your knees.

"take a wild guess?"

"erotica?" he laughs.

you laugh with him, not yet aware of his little plan and the reason he brought you to a place far from people.

"well, tell me. what did you learn from it?"

it's like a switch was found on you. wooyoung is taking in every word you are so excitedly giving him, every expression you make as you remember various paragraphs that had you touching yourself late at night, or sometimes in the middle of the day at most random places.

"no way, you touched yourself in your college bathroom?" he is in disbelief.

"believe it or not, it becomes stronger than me. so, yes. multiple times, actually."

"what exactly did you do?" wooyoung asks, genuinely interested.

you have passed the shame barrier. the way he is caressing your skin and so comfortably talking to you about these things have you finally dropping your walls down. not even your friends have made it this far into the conversation without a smart remark or a grimace.

"just, rubbing myself, i guess? ah, i once used a water bottle to do it. it was so hot that day, and my bottle was wet and cold, and my brain just clicked."

wooyoung seems impressed, nodding his head with approval.

"i might have touched myself a little in the last row of the classroom."

"oh?" he is intrigued, mind already picturing you hidden in the last row behind your studying laptop, faking the writing while your other hand played with his new favorite thing in the world. "like this?"

the sudden contact with your clit makes you jolt, a gasp escaping your lips. he spins it in slow circles, much like you in that boring class. you breathe slowly, mouth already running dry from the sight in front of you. wooyoung stares deep into your eyes, tongue wetting his lips, and his hair messy from the highway wind. he looks incredibly good in his leather jacket and the chain necklace. you can hear yourself becoming wet, noises making both of you breathe shallow and feeding your lust drive. you feel exposed under the neon lights, under wooyoung's stare, on the side of the road. yet the pleasure is overpowering everything, and you find yourself shamelessly grinding your hips against his thumb. his confidence is affecting yours, and seeing him not give a single fuck about the location or the passerbies, it is unleashing something inside of you.

"fuck, angel, even your cunt sounds so cute."

you give yourself a moment of bravery, fingers hooking under his chain necklace and pulling his body towards you. your lips touch his, warm plush making your thighs clench. he chuckles against you, then leaves a few pecks on your bottom lip. he tugs it between his teeth, gently biting it and swiping his tongue on it. you give yourself to him, completely at his control, and only follow what he does.

he removes his hand from you, resulting in a whine leaving your mouth. he laughs again, pulling away for a moment.

"patience, baby. you're doing very good."

he kisses you again, his hands snaking around your waist and under your top. he feels your skin, the lace of your bra, plays with the hook, but doesn't undo it yet. he grazes your spine with his trimmed nails, giving you goosebumps. you shiver in his hands, wanting nothing more but to relax in his hands and have him do that to you all night long.

his tongue is restless against yours, gently rubbing against it, teeth accidentally clashing from the passion getting the most out of him. he wants all of you, right here, right now. but he can't have you just yet. like he said, he would destroy you. he can't hold back that much. he almost melts when he feels your fingers gently tug at his hair, your other hand subconsciously resting on his chest. he thinks it's cute how you are at a position above him and higher than him, yet he still has all the control over you. he also thinks it's cute how your legs are still swinging from the stone table, while you kiss him back and try to keep up with him. your kisses are short, your tongue soft, and your hair is tickling his cheeks, a complete opposite of his deep and long kisses, with an occasional teasing bite.

"wooyoung," you mumble, pulling away.

he hums, waiting for you to respond. you rest your forehead against his, taking a moment to breathe normally again.

"i want to cum on your tongue, please?" you ask so sweetly, big eyes staring into his.

"i had something else in mind, though. but i'll see what i can do, since you asked me so nicely."

he isn't sure how he can feel so soft and so hard for someone. you are the first one that is actually taking his time with him and listening to him to make it all more enjoyable. the rest of them wanted it quick, and frequent. he prefers it this way now, with more lust building up, and he knows the result will pay off. maybe you are growing impatient, maybe you'd just smack him right there on the spot, but he is very fixed on his idea, and he loves that you are listening him so patiently.

"lay down for me."

you lay on the cold surface, elbows digging into the uneven stone while they support your upper body so you can look at him. your breath hitches when his hand slides up your body, between your breasts, and up to your lips.

"open up."

and you do, taking his two fingers into your mouth. you swirl your tongue around them, slow, maintaining eye-contact with him. you are pretty sure you're dripping all over the table now, if not all over his pants too. he toys with your tongue for a while, too immersed in the way you're licking him up.

fuck, how good you'd take his cock. he'd push so slow between your glossy lips, which he would coat with his precum, and he would gently test your limits and have you gagging around him. wooyoung stops the train of thoughts before it was too late, and pulls his fingers out of your mouth. he then runs them up and down your slit, toying with the folds more than the clit. you want to groan from frustration, but you have to be patient, just like he said.

he spreads your folds, tongue diving right into the tip of your clit. your fingers reach into his hair, pulling at the dark strands and burying his head deeper into your cunt. he is loving every bit of it, willingly pushing himself deeper between your thighs and squishing them around his head. you hear him suck and lick, setting your heart on fire, and making your blood boil.

"wooyoung-" you gasp, clit abused by his restless muscle.

he only hums against you, lips sucking you slowly but with power. you don't know how loud you are, nor do you care. you let your voice loose, calling out his name, whining, bucking your hips into his mouth, moaning and chasing the orgasm that has already started to pool at the bottom of your stomach.

his fingers let go of your folds, instead focusing on a new place. he toys with your entrance, sending weird sensations through your body. ever so slowly, he pushes one finger inside, making you hold your breath at the uncomfortable feeling.

"that hurts-" you whine, all the pleasure gone.

"you can take it, right? for me?"

you look down at his eyes, the neon lights shining inside them.

"watch," he mumbles, nodding his head towards your drenched pussy.

you do as told, watching as his finger disappears into you, each pump a little less uncomfortable. he curls his finger upwards, unlocking a whole new sensation for you. you moan, more at the sight than the feeling. something about his veiny hand working on you and disappearing so smoothly inside of you is more arousing to you than a whole movie sex scene.

"i'm adding another one, alright?"

you gulp, then nod. you watch him carefully insert two fingers, slowly stretching you out. inch by inch, he fully inserts them, all the way to the knuckles, and stays there for a while.

"atta girl." he says, tone low and raspy, dripping with desire.

"it's too much," you whine, tears gathering in the corners of your eyes.

"just a little more, angel. i promise, it'll feel good." he coos, cupping your jaw with his other hand and caressing your cheek. "can you do that for me?"

you nod, fighting hard to push the tears back. the last thing you want is to turn out a coward, after all those erotica books you've told him about. reading about all that monster porn, fairy porn, and whatnot, yet you can't take two human fingers. pathetic.

"look at you, taking me so well." he praises, moving his fingers at a faster pace now.

you feel your hole stretching for the first time, and you are not sure if the sensation you are feeling is enough to make you cum. you stay still, watching him work on you, and focusing on relaxing your muscles around him. he curls his fingers up again, and another moan escapes your lips. he leans in, just enough to feel you breathe into his mouth. proper moans finally leave your mouth, and you leave all the gasps and shallow breathing behind. you shamelessly moan into his mouth, hands gripping anything they can; from his clothes and chain, to his hair and shoulders. you rock your hips along with his pumps, finally finding a path towards the sweet release. but wooyoung shows no intention of speeding up, even though you tried taking the matter into your own hands. you feel like spilling over any moment now, but the way he switches between slow and slower is driving you crazy.

"shit," he curses, suddenly pulling your body into his lap.

you moan when you sit on his fingers, knuckles trapped deep in your hole. you don't have time to process what is happening, a bright light shining into wooyoung's eyes and your back.

another motorcycle stops beside his, two people your age getting off of it.

"hey, what's up?" the stranger greets, politely waving.

the girl doesn't spare you a glance, but instead opts to stare at wooyoung.

"we're just gonna take a five minute break, sorry to bother you guys." the young man explains.

"that's fine," wooyoung smiles back.

the stranger then leaves behind one of the trees, and the girl takes a seat on the opposite of you two.

"aren't you, like, jung wooyoung?" her voice is pure torture, squeaky and fake.

"uh, yes."

"you have an enormous dick, babe. fuck, i masturbate to you almost every night."

your heart clenches, but apparently, so does your pussy, because wooyoung is quick to give you another stretch of his fingers inside you. you bite your lip, head falling on his shoulder. your back is turned towards the girl, so you cannot see if she is doing anything to get wooyoung's attention away from you. you don't like it.

"glad you enjoy my content," he replies calmly, as if he gets that every day.

maybe he does. and just then, you remember what wooyoung is. he is a cam boy, a porn star. he isn't a guy who took you on a date outside of the city. he is just someone who got tired of fucking experienced people and wants to try something new. you bite the inside of your cheek, tears gathering in your eyes now for a whole different reason.

it's his fault that he's so nice to you. didn't he say he would destroy you? you have developed a crush on him, and you didn't even realize. you need to back off, as soon as possible, before you become one of his toys for views. and with his sweet talk, it could happen without you even processing it first.

"do you do those live fuck invites anymore? i'd love to be your guest sometimes. maybe you know me, i was at top five performers last month?"

"ah, rosiedesires?" he is quick to answer.

his fingers slowly move, and you have to bury your head into his neck to keep yourself from making any noise. he smells heavenly, the scent of musk making you a little dizzy. you don't realize you are panting and whining, until he leans down to your ear.

"be good." he whispers with a little stern tone, nuzzling his nose into your cheek and leaving a quick peck there. if his fingers weren't up your pussy right now, you would've felt butterflies.

you don't know if he is mad at you, or if it's just a part of his play. either way, as bad as you are feeling, you don't want him to stop. you want him to make you cum, so that you can leave and cut all communication with him. you'll manage on your own without him, and there's still yunho. well, was. but knowing his feelings for you, he'll be quick to make up with you.

"friday night sound good?"

"yes, of course. perfect! can't wait, our followers are gonna be so excited."

did he just make a dick appointment while his fingers are deep inside of you? while you are holding back tears on his shoulder? while you are almost biting off the inside of your cheek?

"but wait, i don't do taken people. is that your partner or something?"

"ah no, that's just my coworker. he drives me home every night, we live in the same building. and uh, that..." she trails, probably pointing at you, "...is not your girlfriend?"

"no, no, of course not. she's also someone i've met on the site."

someone i've met on the site.

of course, what else did you think? that he was also falling in love with you? how stupid. now you know how yunho felt. you know exactly how he felt, when you made him feel dumb for having a one sided love. though, this isn't love yet, but still.

"shy, i see. hello, do you speak?"

the way she is talking to you is making you feel humiliated and small. as if you're an alien, asking if you speak.

"whore." you mumble.

"what?" she asks, confusion evident in her voice.

you finally raise your head, cheeks puffed and eyes red. wooyoung finally sees how bad he fucked up, and his heart breaks a little at the sight.

maybe it was just the sexual frustration. maybe it was the anger. maybe the disappointment. or maybe just the way she chewed that gum and looked at you like you were a piece of shit on the side of the road. whatever it was, it gave you enough of confidence to repeat yourself.

"whore."

"you stupid bitch," she scoffs, and you almost laugh when you see red lipstick smeared on her teeth as she calls you more names.

"openly talking about fucking a random guy and then getting offended by a single word? fucking weirdo." the words are quicker than your mind, and you feel wooyoung's fingers leaving you and instead gripping your waist.

"listen here, you fucking prude, i will fuck you up-"

"alright, let's take you home." wooyoung interrupts. "rosie, i'll reach out to you these days."

"sure thing, baby."

not so gentle anymore, wooyoung hands you the helmet. the change in his behaviour in front of a different woman is baffling to you. you feel like throwing up, and dropping right there in the middle of the road. anger is building up inside of you, enough for you to push the helmet back into his hands.

"put that on." he orders, brows knitted.

"no." you spit out.

"i will not repeat myself." his tone lowers, yet his gaze darkens.

"you don't have to." you strike back, not aware of the consequences building up.

"do you want to fucking hurt yourself? put this on right now, before i put it on for you."

fear creeps into your body, slow, and grows more with each second that passes and his gaze stays on you. you gulp, suddenly finding yourself in a mental conflict. you do not want to go with him. you want to stay here, curl up under the table and cry until morning, and mourn that little hope you had left and that he crushed. yet he is your only way home. but it is such a long drive, and you don't have the energy to be near him.

so you turn your back, and start walking towards the city lights.

"and just what do you think you are doing?" wooyoung grabs your elbow, pulling your body against his.

"leave me be."

"i asked, what do you think you are doing?" he asks again, gaze not softening.

"i am going home."

"you're-"

"jung wooyoung," you say through gritted teeth," i. am. going. home."

and with that, you start your way to the distant skyscrapers. it hurts you that only two minutes after, two motorcycles pass by you, one of them very familiar. he only spares you a glance through the mirror, then speeds up and disappears.

finally, you cry. loud sobs, chest heavy and body shaking. you drag your legs for what seems like hours, yet the buildings remained the same. you pull out your phone, searching through contacts. nobody is close enough with you for you to call them and pick you up. except your only fast dial, yunho.

what is there to lose? you've reached the bottom anyways.

it takes only two rings for him to pick up, and you fail to greet him. instead, a sob leaves your mouth.

"tiny?" he calls, voice concerned.

"can you please come get me?"

to say that yunho was furious would be an understatement. you haven't told him anything yet, but it was enough to find you sitting alone on a bench outside of the city, on a road where prostitutes and dealers often met, with ripped panties laying on the floor.

his heart is tight, and he feels his throat closing as he approaches you. dark lines decorate your puffed cheeks, the makeup you always so happily put on now a fluid disaster. you run into yunho's arms, finally warm and secure. he buries his noise into your hair, leaving kisses on top of your head as he rubs your back. he knows what to do when you're upset, and you are grateful for that. you need silent support, no questions, no getting you to talk, just someone's presence and comfort. you finally look into his eyes, and just when you thought you cried it all out, you start sobbing again.

"it's okay." he assures you, cupping your face.

"can i stay-" you hiccup, your lungs having a hard time to balance breathing and speaking, "can i-"

you sob again, frustrated because you can't form a sentence. you feel like ripping your hair out because of your stupidity.

"you can stay at my place," yunho understands, gently guiding you towards his car and opening the back door for you.

"no, no-"

"there's more space for you to lay down. trust me, you'll be comfortable."

"i want the front."

"but-"

"please."

yunho doesn't immediately drive to his place. he drives past the highway exits for the city, and you are too tired to question it. you fight to stay awake, but the burning sensation of your eyes is making it quite difficult. every now and then, yunho glances at you, making sure you're alright and comfortable. you have your seat pushed back, and your body turned towards him. it makes you feel safer when you open your eyes and see him in front of you.

the lights are fading, allowing the moonlight to take over and illuminate yunho's face. has he always been this pretty?

you're skipping classes, opting to stay in yunho's bed instead. you're rotting in his room, only watching him come and go. he has a job, and classes to attend, and by the time he finally gets home, you are fast asleep. the food he so carefully prepares you stays cold on the counter, flies getting to it before you do. it is making him sad, seeing you in such a state. you didn't speak of that night, and he didn't want to ask in case you go further into your shell.

today was no different. you are awoken by his alarm, then him tossing and turning on his side. he is careful to leave a distance between you two, even when he is asleep. you feel the warmth leave the space behind your back, then hear footsteps. you hear shuffling, and you open your eyes to see what he is wearing today.

he wears a plain white t-shirt, black ripped jeans, and a leather jacket. the weather is still confusing, and you are glad you don't have to tell him to bring a jacket with him. he also wears his signature boots, sitting on your side of the bed as he puts them on.

"yuyu?" you call.

"yes, sweetheart?"

"when are you coming home today?"

he stays silent. you think he doesn't hear you, so you repeat. yunho sighs.

"i don't have classes today. and i have a day off."

"oh," is all you can say. you aren't sure if it's a sound of disappointment or surprise. either way, you are not thrilled.

"i'll be back in a few hours."

he doesn't look at you. instead, he stands up, picking up his bag and house keys. you finally sit up straight, blanket still wrapped around you.

"where-" you clear your throat, voice coming out raspy and cracking, "-where are you going?"

"a date."

yunho finally spares you a glance, one enough to let you know that he grew tired of you playing with his emotions, and is tired catering to you when all of his efforts have gone to waste.

"there's food in the fridge if you get hungry. i'm having breakfast outside."

then there you are, again in the dark room, alone with your thoughts. you think about both of them. yunho, who has been by your side for so long, and has respected your boundaries despite his strong feelings. and wooyoung, who is there just a few weeks, yet has such a strong impact on you. you feel discarded by both sides. yunho? justified. wooyoung? not as much.

yes, he is just a porn star. yes, you may be delusional. and yes, he might fuck other people. but the urge in you to feel him just one more time, to let him teach you so you can be good enough for someone you truly care about, is burning inside of you.

bullshit. you want to be good enough for him. you have always been way more intrigued by things you cannot have. wooyoung is an unattainable goal, something you can only dream of having. then again, what do you actually want with him? you only know him sexually, you know nothing about him as a person. you only crave him physically, while you crave yunho emotionally.

but you can't have both, and the way the tables have turned, you are left with neither.

the day is slow, and the sun is going down with the tiktoks on your phone screen. when you feel your stomach tighten and growl, you finally glance at the room around you. it is dark, it smells like old clothes, and the lack of fresh air starts suffocating you. yunho's washed, unironed work clothes sit on his gaming chair, waiting to be ironed by him. it would have been done long time ago, if you didn't take up his whole room.

you switch between the apps, from tiktoks to reels, to youtube shorts, then back to reels. you've seen every video possible, not a single one funny anymore. you feel numb. your stomach is giving you signals, which you so successfully ignore. much like your bladder. it is hitting your ovaries, causing indescribable pain, yet you choose to lay there and mourn over your will to live. you return to the instagram homepage, and when you see yunho's icon in the stories, you just have to click it. when you do, you see him posing with a young woman your age, at the breakfast place you used to visit the first year of college. he has ordered his usual, you notice. and she has ordered yours.

he looks genuinely happy, his smile wide, and his eyes squinted. his arm is wrapped around her shoulders, and the other one holds the phone taking the picture. she is busy holding his face in her hand, lightly squishing his cheeks, just like you like to do.

"fuck me." you groan, then shut your phone off.

as if a switch has clicked inside of you, you run to the bathroom, eager to end your suffering. it takes you less than half an hour to take a shower, put on clean clothes, and do the basic skin care you have ignored for a few days now. you use yunho's expensive products, of course. he won't mind as long as he doesn't know you used them.

by the time the sun sets, the room looks brand new. you have put on new sheets, dusted the shelves, vacuumed the floor, and even ironed his clothes and neatly put them in the closet. the messy notes on his desk were now waiting for him in the drawer, with an attached pink note from you of the solution to the math problem he has been trying to solve on four pages now.

in the kitchen, you fish for ingredients. you decide to make his favorite for when he comes home, to at least thank him somehow for giving you comfort and support these days.

what time do you think you are coming?

yunho: around half an hour to an hour, i think. why?

i am making dinner, i didn't want to start early so it doesn't get cold.

you see the three dots on his screen popping up a few times, then disappearing. you set the phone aside, focusing on the garlic and onion in the pan so they don't get burnt. he loves your pasta bolognese, and won't eat it anywhere but from you. special flavor, he says. you don't have the heart to tell him that you just add in one more spice that the restaurants don't. you don't want to break the little tradition of you making pasta late at night for the two of you.

your phone pings, twice.

wooyoung has started a live! tap to watch.

yunho: i'm not coming for dinner. sorry x

and it's all it takes. really, that's all.

it takes less than five minutes for you to shut off the stove, then settle in the freshly made bed, yunho's boxers already pooling at your ankles. you realize how pathetic you look, getting ready to touch yourself to a guy that left you on the side of the road, in your best friend's bed. but to be fair, you were stubborn too. maybe you just didn't expect him to let you go so easily. maybe you expected him to stay back and comfort you, say sorry because of his harsh actions. or at least reach out to you afterwards. but no, jung wooyoung kept his distance. you checked the messages, regularly. not even an online tag from him. nothing.

until now.

wooyoung has started a live with rosiedairies! tap to watch.

your stomach tightens. is it friday already? time for that dick appointment. your finger hovers over the notificaton, mind working hard to figure out whether or not you can handle looking at something like that. you convince yourself that you can. it's just sex. it's not like you've never seen it before.

your finger taps the notification, and your screen take up two naked bodies, already going at it. it isn't hot at all. you could swear that all your arousal has dried up within two seconds.

wooyoung has the camera showing her face as she stays in doggy position and only his lower body is visible behind her, hips snapping harshly into hers. it doesn't look real. it look so staged and fake, ugly and raw. but she seems to love it, judging by the way her eyes roll to the back of her head and the noises overpowering the ones of skin clapping. wooyoung pulls her hair, and even though you've fantasized about that too, it isn't quite like this. all that hair pulling in your fanfics and books was indeed harsh, but still with a note of passion and love. this? this was pure pain.

"harder, harder-" she chokes, seductively looking at the camera.

what she asks, wooyoung delivers. the grip on her waist makes her skin white, likely to leave bruises afterwards. he picks up the camera, angling it on her bottom and his pelvis. the sight isn't a turn on for you, but you notice the condom, the bruises on her skin, and the scratch marks on his body. the people in the comment section are going feral, giving him orders on what to do to her, on what they'd like to do to him, and sending lots of money. you're grossed out, and just when you are about to exit the site, you hear the front door shut.

you pull the boxers up, jumping out of the bed and making it. you lock your phone, throwing it on the nightstand, before rushing to the bathroom and shutting the door. you hear footsteps, and not double ones like you expected. you fix your hair in the mirror, trying for that i woke up like this look.

"it's me," he announces while entering the room.

"back already?"

"wow."

you fail to hide the smile because of his reaction. he was probably expecting to find you laying under a blanket with your phone on full volume, like he did for the past few days. you didn't even take care of yourself, let alone help him with chores. you wanted to redeem yourself, at least a little bit.

you exit the bathroom as nonchalantly as you can, as if you didn't just do a 180° in the time he was out. he looks even more dashing than when he left. his hair is messy and skin glowing, and his lips have that red tint that suits him so well.

"how was your date?"

"it was great," he avoids your gaze while scratching his neck, "we're going on a second one sunday evening. making it fancy this time."

"that's so awesome! i'm happy for you."

your acting is so convincing, it has yunho feeling disappointed with your behaviour. sure, you wouldn't be jealous. but wouldn't you be bothered at least a little bit? a random girl entering your lives and taking up his free time instead of you, and you are happy?

"what do you say we go out for breakfast tomorrow, and i'll tell you everything?" he tests the grounds.

"sounds wonderful." you don't drop your guard.

you forget that yunho doesn't know the actual situation with wooyoung. so when he stops in front of the coffee shop the next morning and holds the door open for you, you rather enter than make a fuss out of it. you slide into your usual seat, letting yunho take the orders. the familiar man exits the pantry, smile dropping when he sees his next costumer. he immediately searches for your figure in the seating area, and upon finding you, he fails to hide a smile. you, on the other hand, don't. you stand your ground, poker face on and emotions on standby. for now.

"iced americano and a strawberry mocha?"

"yes," yunho confirms, "extra-"

"extra syrup, whipped cream, pearls. got it."

yunho looks annoyed, but doesn't say anything. he almost throws the money at wooyoung, tells him to keep the change, then joins you at the table.

you finally take a good look at him. each day, he is getting more attractive in your eyes. did he always dress this handsomely? was he always this tall?

"you like my coat?" he laughs, noticing your stare.

"well, yes. suits you. the turtleneck too. when did you get a fashion sense?"

"i've got to attract the ladies somehow." yunho jokes, then becomes serious once he sees wooyoung approaching with the beverages.

the cup is placed in front of you, and right away, you see a difference. knowing that you'll let it slide, yunho decides to speak for you.

"pearl sprinkles. not this rainbow puke."

"i only have rainbow puke." wooyoung scoffs, throwing the paper straws on the table. "drink it, or don't. i don't care."

"you should've told me that when i ordered." yunho keeps pushing, and the tension between the two is making you squirm in the chair.

"well guess what?" wooyoung leans in, one hand on the table, the other on the back of your chair. his face is inches away from yours, eyes fixed on your widened ones.

"get away from her, that's highly unprofessional."

"if she minded, she would've said something," the barista looks over at yunho for a split second, then returns his gaze on you, "but she doesn't mind, do you, darling?"

stuck between not wanting to hurt yunho, and wanting to subconsciously submit to wooyoung, you remain silent. wooyoung stays in the position for what seemed like hours, even though it was mere three seconds of it, then finally takes his position behind the counter.

"right, forgot he's your new boyfriend," the man on your opposite scoffs and takes a sip of his beverage.

"he's not-"

"kiyomi will be here any minute, by the way. can't wait for you to meet her."

"woah, is she okay with meeting me so soon? i mean, your first date was yesterday?"

he shrugs, glancing at his phone, "i don't see why not. you're just a friend. it's not like you're a relative or someone closer."

ouch.

"right," you clear your throat.

as promised, she arrives, breaking the silence and interrupting yunho's twitter scrolling. she's pretty, just like on the picture. the moment she sits next to him and starts talking, you see she is obsessed with him. she is joyful, talkative, optimistic, everything that you currently aren't. you notice wooyoung looking over multiple times, but what you don't notice is the way yunho is examining your face, looking for any clues of jealousy or discomfort.

you seem unaffected, and it makes his heart ache. just what does he have to do to get to you? getting a girl just to experiment didn't work, and now he has to either let the poor girl go or keep fueling her hopes and leave her later, until he gets a reaction from you. yumho hates himself for doing that. but yunho hates you too, as much as he loves you. you break his heart every day, but every time you look at him, you put it back together so easily. he wants to kiss you, as much as he wants to push you away from himself. he is lost in his own emotions, and doesn't know what he wants anymore.

"excuse me, i'll be right back."

"where are you going?" yunho betrays himself, asking you too quickly.

"toilet. wanna come?" you try to lighten the situation with a joke, seeing his date tense up at his reaction.

"ah no, thanks. gross. you go enjoy yourself. don't fall in." he joins in the joke, also taking notice of his partner's body language.

you enter the toilet, ignoring the cash register where wooyoung has busied himself with typing something on the screen. the you in the mirror looks like she is mocking you, your clothes and your behaviour. you've put on the newest dress you had, and you don't even know for who. both of them? you like yunho's soft lingering gaze on you, yet you enjoy the way wooyoung looks a second away from devouring you on that table. it's a simple long sleeved dress, really, paired with knee-high boots yunho had bought you for christmas.

the door swings open, bumping into you and pushing you against the wall. you only catch a glimpse of the familiar apron, before the man cups your face and presses his lips on yours. you are taken aback, body frozen against the cold tiles. wooyoung holds your face gently, lips moving slow as to not scare you off more.

"i'm sorry, i'm so fucking sorry," he whispers against your lips, pecking them a few times before apologizing again.

"wooyoung-"

"please, let me make it up to you. i don't care what that cunt outside says, i don't believe him anyway, just let me make it up to you."

you're having a hard time thinking rationally. do you really trust him enough to not hurt you again? fuck, but his lips feel so good. but oh, how yunho's hugs feel like home.

but nobody has ever shown desire the way wooyoung does.

yet nobody has more patience for you than yunho.

"you're thinking too much. let me fix that."

your lips are trapped by his once again, this time more rhythmic. you give into the touch, erasing the man outside completely from your mind.

"you're so sweet."

you hum against his lips, hands tugging at his white ironed shirt, the first two buttons separated as always.

"so cute." kiss. "so pretty." kiss. "so adorable." kiss. "so perfect."

you're not sure where it is going, but you do not complain. you do not complain when he lifts you on the counter near the sink either, flipping your dress up and ripping your panties again. you feel your core tighten, and you think you'll just never get enough of the picture of him ripping your clothes apart.

"let me make you melt on my tongue. please, god, I need it. i so desperately need you, all of you."

"here?" you ask, glancing at the door.

"here, out there, in the pantry, at your place, my place, everywhere. i'd take you to the roof if you told me to."

"anyone could walk in-"

you gasp mid sentence, cold metal pressing against your clit. wooyoung intentionally rubs your folds with his knuckles, giving you the cold sensation of his rings. your head rests against the mirror, hips already grinding into his hand.

loosing his patience, wooyoung sinks to his knees, your legs resting over his shoulders. he dives in, like it's his last meal. he licks hot stripes up your clit, pointy part of his tongue flicking the tip of it. you moan each time he does so, feeling your bud already becoming abused.

while he usually takes his time with you, today he is quick to separate your legs and go feral on you. his tongue is quick, so quick that it has you shaking uncontrollably against his mouth. you're shuddering, begging, pulling at his hair, all at once. a blabbering mess, as he eats you like there's no tomorrow. he dips his tongue into your arousal, letting out a moan of satisfaction.

"can i please cum?" you ask, knowing that he never lets you. why would today be different?

"no, no. not yet." he moves away, standing up and getting back to your face. "it needs to be special."

"it's just an orgasm, how special can it be?"

"mine always are, believe me. i want to be your first real one. i want you to remember it." wooyoung says as he continues to caress your cheeks with his thumbs.

the action is affectionate, as if he just confessed to having a crush on you and didn't just eat you out. funny how every time you meet him, you end up getting absolutely devoured by him in ways that you didn't even read about. he is passionate about it, to the point that it makes you think that he does it for his own pleasure.

"come over to my place."

"what?" your voice comes out louder than you wanted it.

"my place. i'll take good care of you. give you what you deserve."

you don't have time to reply, he is pulling you off the sink and disappearing into a stall. a quick glance in the mirror is enough to make your hands shoot up to your hair, straightening it and fixing the smeared mascara on the corner of your eyes.

"hey?"

yunho's head peeks inside, scanning the room. he sees you alone, and immediately feels at ease.

"yes, yunho?"

"i just got worried, you've been here for a while." he admits.

"so you left your date alone?" you can't bear to look him in the eyes, not when you just finished messing with the person he saved you from the other night.

"to be truthful, i saw that shitass barista disappear somewhere, and i thought he came after you. i'd hate to think that something happened to you and i was sitting just outside."

you appreciate his truthfulness, and don't have the heart to tell him just how weak to your instincts you are.

"don't worry, i'm good. let's go."

wooyoung: it's been almost a week

wooyoung: you don't think about me at all?

wooyoung: my offer, i mean. not me.

you don't know if you're being delusional, but you feel like the tables have turned. which is why you have reached out to another friend, one that doesn't have feelings for you and won't try to sabotage, well, whatever this is.

"honestly, from all these messages, you have unknowingly made him chase you. notice how you don't say much and he comes back texting you multiple times?" choi san is quick to explain, using his own flirting skills to decipher the conversation.

he lays on his stomach on your bed, pillow under it and legs swinging in the air. his freshly dyed blonde hair is a dry mess, struggling to hold onto his scalp. you wonder why his job requires him to ruin himself this much.

"now what do i do?"

"well, luckily for you, your lack of communication is what got you an advantage here. let's face it, you're dry as fuck."

"thanks."

"welcome. anyways, in your case, that's good. see? instead of giving up and leaving, he keeps coming back to you. and eating your pussy every time you two meet? are you kidding me? that man is obsessed with you."

at the mention of him eating you, your thighs clench, almost feeling his tongue down there. it is driving you crazy, having so much pleasure yet not reaching the peak. he is torturing you, on purpose.

wooyoung: i'll make you cum so hard you'll never wish for anyone but me

wooyoung: and that's a promise.

two new messages light up your phone, san grabbing it before you can. he covers his mouth, eyes wide as he reads the messages over and over. he unlocks the phone, and begins typing.

"no!"

"i'm doing you a favor!" he exclaims, running around the room and still typing.

you hear the sending sound, and your face heats up. he throws the phone on your bed, and sits right next to you.

"what have you done?"

"see for yourself. that, my dear, is called not being dry."

bold of you to think that i'll only wish for you

"that doesn't sound like me at all! you blew it!"

you are quick to bury your face in a pillow, already mourning all this time you've spent and regretting inviting san to help. but when another notification decorates your screen, you almost jump.

wooyoung: why don't you come over for a demostration?

"you do realize that if you go, you might lose your v-card?"

"i know."

"and you're sure that's the person you want to do it with?"

"yes."

he believes you as much as you believe yourself. you always thought your first time would be somewhere romantic, pre-planned, with the person you love and loves you back. not in the apartment of a porn star. and not with someone that only knows your name.

"you know, my heart really hurts for yunho."

"i invited you to avoid him. why are you bringing him up?" your fierce tone takes him aback, and it takes you aback too, you just manage to not show it.

"wow." san exhales.

"sorry, just- it's none of your business."

"how is it none of my business? i mean, i tried to not get involved, even came here to help you hook up with a complete stranger and help you throw away the best thing that can and will happen to you. i introduced you to yunho, knowing full well on his harmless little crush on you, and knowing full well that you were perfect for him. only to have you-"

"wait a minute, you can't guilt trip me into liking him."

the man in front of you is baffled with your reply, and you feel like you're not looking at one of your close friends anymore. now, you are looking at yunho's best friend, almost his younger brother. you forgot that before you, there was the two of them.

"someone seriously needs to fuck that attitude right out of you. you're acting like an animal in heat."

"well i'm fucking trying to!"

"well you're trying the wrong fucking way!"

"do not tell me who and how to fuck!"

the phone is pinging on your bed, not helping the situation at all. san is looking more disappointed than angry, his eyes becoming scarily dark.

"the fuck do you even know about fucking?"

"i know enough." you don't drop your guard.

san takes a step towards you, examining your face. then another, and another, until you are pushed in the corner of your room with him towering over you. there is nothing attractive about it in this situation, and you wish

"you may know about fucking, but you don't know shit about loving."

"shut up," is the only thing you manage to say, biting back tears.

"i am not guilt tripping you to like or love anyone, but the least you could do is let him down gently and stop playing push and pull with him. giving him hope, then shattering him right after it? not quite moral in my book."

"look, i'm in a difficult situation. i just- i like them both."

choi san laughs, sarcastically. he doesn't find it funny. he just doesn't know how to respond anymore.

"you don't like them both. you like wooyoung, and want to keep yunho as a backup."

"excuse-?"

"save it. i don't even know why i came here, helping you hurt my friend. you have started thinking with your pussy more than your brain, and you're losing people because of it. if you're horny, watch fucking porn."

with that, he grabs his leather jacket off your bed, and storms outside. you are feeling frustrated, angry, and sad. he is right, you know it. but you don't want to admit it. because somehow, in your head, if you don't admit it, it isn't like that. ignoring a problem makes it go away. simple as that.

you want to keep yunho, and his love, and his affection, but you want a taste of wooyoung so bad. so bad that your clit aches when you open his messages, yearning for his cold fingers and hot tongue.

wooyoung: do you like movies?

wooyoung: i thought we could watch the live adaptation of that book you like reading

wooyoung: what was it again?

wooyoung: if you want to, of course

wooyoung has sent a picture! tap to view.

you stop breathing for a moment, thinking of all the things you could expect in that image. you breathe out when you open it, seeing a pullout sofa and a blanket on it, along with snacks and two bottles of soda.

wooyoung: i'd be happy if you joined me :)

why, rosie unavailable?

wooyoung: i'm gonna go ahead and ignore that, for the sake of both of us

whatever that means

why are you the one sabotaging yourself now? yunho isn't here, and san has left too. then why?

wooyoung: it means that i don't like it when people mock what i do

wooyoung: and when people mock me, i become angry

wooyoung: and angry and horny don't go well together

wooyoung: unless you want to put it to test?

wooyoung angry fucking you? you grimace. would it be the kind of sex he did in his last live with that rosie girl? if yes, you are feeling very turned off right now. he must've sensed the lack of replying on your side, and is quick to respond again.

wooyoung: can't help it, sorry

wooyoung: just come over and we can hang?

your phone pings, sending you a message with a different name on top.

choi san: bet his new live will bring him a fortune. who else has taken someone's virginity live on a porn site?

what the fuck are you on about? there's no live.

choi san: that's what you think

choi san: or that's what he'll make you think

choi san: unless he convinces you to willingly do it

he wouldn't. would he? wooyoung who has asked you before each contact whether you're sure, or whether you're feeling nervous. wooyoung who already had his hands on your tits, and still wanted to ask if you're sure. he wouldn't secretly film you. he wouldn't.

what do you consider a hang? and why?

wooyoung: just hang? watch that movie and talk?

wooyoung: because

wooyoung: idk

wooyoung: you're so stiff and awkward yet i wanna know more about you and see you

wooyoung: i guess i want to be the one to unstiff you?

wooyoung: NOT LIKE THAT

wooyoung: i dropped my cool guy vibe just like that

wooyoung: look at me texting you multiple times in a row

wooyoung: i've never ever done that in my life for anyone

wooyoung: so...?

so san was right. you did unintentionally make him chase you. played hard to catch without even knowing it. you have a whole porn star folding for you, and offering you all you ever wanted. or at least you think you wanted.

ping!

yunho: hey just wanted to ask if everything is alright?

yunho: sorry if i somehow hurt you

yunho: you seem a little distant, and i know it might be because of the kiyomi situation, but i promise i care about you so much

yunho: if you want you can come over and we can make that pasta together?

yunho: i also want to talk to you

yunho: properly

it's now or never.

you gonna pick me up or?

you sit in the familiar car, the smell of it relaxing you. he knows how to make scents work and not make them literally bite your nose. you take a good look at him. he wears a simple short sleeved black t-shirt, along with grey ripped jeans and black boots. his hair is a little messy, but it only adds up to his look. every time you see him, you forget just how good he looks.

"angel?"

"wooyoung?"

he laughs, eyes not moving off the road.

"are you okay?"

"yes." you simply reply, shifting your attention to the surrounding houses.

you don't speak the rest of the way, just enjoying his humming and wheel tapping. it isn't uncomfortable silence. at least not for you. you can also hear faint vibrations coming from your phone in your bag, and you know exactly who they belong to.

"whoever that is, they sure are persistent." wooyoung comments.

"sorry. i'll shut it off."

"oh, no. please. i was just noticing."

you finally take the phone out, screen bombarded with his notifications. just when you wanted to clear the notification tab, he calls, and you click the green phone.

"shit."

"hello?"

wooyoung glances at your phone, eyebrows furrowed. he keeps driving, not saying a word.

"hey, yunho, now is not a good time-"

"it never is lately anyway. listen, i will just say what i wanted to like this."

"yunho, no-"

"i love you. i don't even think about the words like or crush anymore, i know, i'm sure, that i love you. and i know you're slipping away from me, and i know there's no way to stop it."

you stare at wooyoung, who is carefully listening to the voice coming from your device. you are shaking, thoughts running wild. you are becoming more aware of your feelings towards yunho, and aware about the situation you are putting yourself in. you are on your way to shatter everything you've ever had with him, and everything you could've had with him. for just a taste of what seemed to only exist in your mind.

"i won't blame you if you go with him. i'm just afraid of you getting hurt, maybe worse than that night. and this time i might not be around to fix it. i do not have the energy anymore. i'm sorry."

san was right about this too, and you hate him for it. all this time you subconsciously kept yunho as a backup. you've convinced yourself that he isn't your type, and you did so good at it. until now.

"i'm not saying you should respond to any of my feelings, but it would've been nice if you came to me and said something along the lines of "sorry yunho, i don't think we will ever be what you want us to be" instead of luring me in and pushing me around. calling me when you need it, then ignore me when you get what you want. i hate that i love you, and i hate that i have to humiliate myself like this every damn time. but i promised myself this would be my last. unless you really wish to discuss all of this properly, and whether or not you want our friendship to continue despite all this. tonight is your last chance. i am speaking to you as a friend now. i want to know where i stand."

you are speechless. he has touched the darkest spot in your heart. that dusty corner reserved for love. the kind of love san accused you of not knowing. how are you supposed to respond when there is a whole man next to you, a man who has also asked you to hang and talk tonight?

"i'll wait until midnight. if you don't show up, that will also help me know where i stand. but then, know that you might not hear from me anymore."

the phone call ends just in time when wooyoung pulls up in his parking spot. he silently exits, opening the door for you. still overwhelmed by the one sided conversation that just happened, you remain seated.

"if you're going to be sulky like that, i will just drive you to him." wooyoung offers, annoyance clear in his tone.

you feel a little irritated for his lack of empathy. but who would empathize with such an awful person like yourself? wooyoung sighs, then crouches in front of the open door on your side.

"you can't sit on two stools at a time, angel. i understand that emotions are hard, and love is complicated. right now, i am offering you something simple, and something harmless. i am not looking for love, i think. i just want to help you discover, and i want to discover you."

not looking for love, that you know. but it feels different hearing it out loud. the i think part right after it went right over your head, only adding to the you really are dense agenda.

"yunho is offering you commitment. real love. something i'm not quite capable of giving you, or anyone. i think with my dick, and he thinks with his heart. that creates a problem for you, because you want to be loved, but you also want a dick to make you stop thinking."

you aren't sure if he is dirty talking, or if this is just the way he speaks about these things. you finally look at him. his hand reaches for yours, gently guiding you out of the car.

"you can sit down and think inside."

but there was not much thinking. you were quick to lay on top of wooyoung, entirely relaxed in his arms as his nails grazed the skin of your thighs. non sexually. just innocent pleasure and the movie playing in the back. but you can't relax all the way, because you know where tonight will lead. you squirming under wooyoung's touch, the only emotions present being lust and yeaerning. you liked yunho. you really did. but the way wooyoung handles you is not like any other. you need to have it, at least one more time.

"you're not watching the movie."

"i know."

"then what are you doing?"

"thinking."

wooyoung sighs. his hands halt on your waist, then help you sit up on his lower stomach as he stays laying down.

"be honest with me. what exactly do you want? i won't judge you."

"i don't know." you lie.

"let me try a different approach. what do you want with me? be completely raw, so we can both know where we stand."

and you do just that. tell him all about your desires, about the feeling of lust which you've mistaken as a crush towards him, about loving how desirable you are feeling when it comes to him, and everything that comes to your mind. he listens, slowly nodding his head as you speak.

"i guess i want to have a little fun with no commitment before the, you know, actual commitment."

"i understand. now, what do you want with yunho?"

"everything."

you do want everything with him. from the kisses he is dying to offer you to whatever kinkery he has hidden behind those shiny eyes. yunho is a man every girl wants, including you, yet he only has heart eyes for you. and you'd be stupid to let that go.

"then go for it."

"see, the thing is- i already got a taste of you. and i want closure. i want to finally get that orgasm you've been delaying for so long."

wooyoung nods, eyebrows a little scrunched. he is focused on putting a stray hair behind your ear, and when that hair refuses to obey him over and over again, he huffs, and finally gives your sentence attention.

"we need to discuss first. what kind of orgasm are we talking?"

"what do you mean?"

"well, now that you've finally come to terms with your feelings towards that yunho dude, taking your v-card is off the table?"

"yeah, i guess." you shrug, as if it was just a hug you were talking about.

"just to warn you, it hurts like hell."

"that i know. thanks."

"he can reach out to me for some tips if he wants. just saying."

"got it."

he smiles, then proceeds.

"filming is off the table?"

"uh-"

"just asking, not forcing. if we are going to do simple oral and, or, fingering, then you know... i'd maybe like some footage. at least for me to enjoy sometimes."

come to think of it, it is risky, and it is something that you wouldn't do ever again when or if you become yunho's partner. this is maybe a once in a lifetime opportunity, and you don't want to waste it.

"i'll give you back by midnight, baby." he winks.

"okay." you agree.

you feel your heart beat faster, and louder. you have just agreed to be filmed, in a stranger's house, touched by that same stranger, and the video will be up for so many people to see. so what? you'll ask him to blur or cut the face out of the frame. simple as that.

"come on then."

the young man stands up, giving you his open hand. little do you know that the gaze you're giving him from below him on that couch is making his pants feel very tight.

you accept his hand, and allow him to lead you to his room. your eyes land on the bed. the very same bed and pillows where he filmed that live, and many other lives after that. wooyoung then gently pushes you towards the bed, hands grazing your waist while his eyes admire your outfit. it looks so easy to take off.

he carefully pushes you on the bed, and you swear you've never felt a mattress so soft. he climbs on the bed, hovering over you and giving you one more head to toe scan.

"so pretty." he whispers.

"thank you." you say, not knowing what else to do.

he laughs, then leans in to give you a kiss sweeter than those cake pops you used to eat throughout your whole high school. he kisses you again, again and again, until you start yearning for more. you reach for his shoulders, hair, neck, anything to make him deepen the kiss and give you one of his passionate ones. he takes his time, playing with your bottom lip and tugging it between his teeth.

"patience." he instructs, then untangles your hands from his hair.

he reaches towards the nightstand. the same nightstand from which he pulled that clear toy out that night you discovered him. instead of something crazy, he pulls a single piece of long fabric. the fabric is shiny and pink, with lace decorating it.

"you trust me?"

"completely."

"that's a good girl." he kisses your forehead before putting the silk over your eyes. "raise your head for me a little bit."

you do as told, enough so he can tie it up behind your head. he adjusts your hair, letting it fall over your shoulders, then traces his finger down your neck and to your collarbones. you almost shiver at his touch. he continues his journey to your shoulders, gently pulling down the sleeves of your dress, then does the same to the other. you feel like everything is ten times more intense, since you can't see anything anymore.

he pulls his hand back, then shuffles on top of you for a while. you hear something hit the floor, and then feel the mattress dip between your legs. wooyoung takes your hand, guiding it towards a source of warmth. you breathe out when you touch his warm skin, nails yearning to dig into it. he helps you trace his abs, his formed chest, and all the way down to his defined v-line. you feel a few veins leading to a place of heaven, or hell, and you have to bite your lip to keep you from smiling.

this is exactly what you want.

"can i see?" you ask nicely.

"no. just feel." he declines, and you hear him smile as he says that.

"okay." you comply, using the opportunity to touch a little more

he then gets off the bed again, and you hear slight rattling. he must be setting up the camera. it doesn't take long for him to come back, placing an object next to you at a certain position.

"i'm only going to be filming myself and your lower body, alright? something like your point of view? you okay with that?"

"yes."

"you sure?"

"yes." you breathe out, feeling his hands caressing your hips.

"we need a safe word, angel."

"god, i don't know, just touch me already. please." you beg like a pathetic slut.

"i know you're impatient, but i really need you to think of a word."

"i don't know." you're becoming annoyed with him.

"how about..." he hums, then kisses your jawline, "mocha?"

"y-yes, that sounds good." you stutter as he plants kisses along your jawline, going down your neck and stopping at collarbones.

"so when you say mocha, i'm stopping everything i'm doing. got it?"

"yes."

"good. i'm turning it on now."

you hear a click, then a short sound. he waits a little, probably for people to join.

"hi, my favorite people. i would do some talking, but to be honest, i can't wait to dive into today's special."

you don' t have time to process his words, he is shuffling through the drawers again. wooyoung then takes your clothes off, and you help him by raising your hips, pulling your arms out your sleeves, all to make him satisfied. he plants a kiss on your knuckles, thumb grazing over them before he sets your hand back down. his lips hover above your skin, blowing cool air along the line of the lingerie bra you wore.

"i like you more in those pastels." he admits.

the man cups your breasts, slowly massaging them and letting his thumbs graze your tense buds over the thin black lace. you squirm under his touch, feeling the pleasure pool in your lower stomach. you swear you could cum from only nipple touching if he did it long enough. you could try that once.

"she's awfully quiet, isn't she? what should i do to her?" he speaks to the camera.

he then takes a few seconds to read the written suggestions, and then chuckles.

"take off the bra? oh, but i quite like it like this. it makes the situation sexier and more intimate. doesn't look like that raw porn you can find on pornhub, right?"

he is right. you got all dolled up for him, would be a shame if he took everything off so soon. you feel a warm wet muscle trace around your areola, building anticipation. his other hand plays with it too, not once touching the nerve ending that is angrily sticking out and demanding attention. he finally gives in, closing his lips around the tense bud and ever so lightly grazes it with the tip of his tongue.

you gasp, arching your back from the mattress. his hand is quick to find its place on your stomach, pushing your body back down and caressing your skin along the way.

"atta girl." he praises, seeing just how obedient you are for him.

his teeth graze your nipple, then gently tug at it. you twitch, hands flying towards him in hopes to grab his hair. he is quick to grab your wrists, pinning your hands above your head.

"i'm the one doing the exploring, angel. you lay there for me like the patient pretty doll you are."

you nod, immediately becoming still. his fingers find a path down your stomach, to the line of your panties. he caresses the skin right above your clit, circling it, grazing the inside of your thighs, your folds, all while ignoring the burning place right in the middle of all that. your hips almost buck into his hand, but you remember to be good. he pushes the panties aside, revealing you to himself and the camera.

"oh, so pretty." he exhales.

you hear him put his fingers in his mouth, coating them in saliva, then dip between your folds. you whine when he touches the tip of your clit, spinning it in circles and making you gasp for air. your hands are still pinned above your head, and his knee is fast to hold your legs open by pressing the inside of your thigh into the mattress. he then dips his fingers below, first one, then two. the feeling of strange and a little uncomfortable is back, but when he starts pumping in and out at a slow pace, occasionally curling his fingers up, you are a moaning mess. you can hear just how wet you are for him, and each time he buries his fingers deep inside of you, you have to fight the urge to moan louder.

"wish you could see just how well you're taking me."

you remember how absolutely hot it looked that night, seeing his fingers disappear inside of you.

"good, good girl. one more? think you can handle?"

there is two already, but you still nod. he adds another finger, deliciously stretching you out and giving you trouble breathing. it seems like hours have passed, and wooyoung is still content with fingering you at a pace that is too slow even for you. he is enjoying the sounds and view you are offering him, and is too mesmerized by the way he is so smoothly disappearing inside of you, all while you breathe heavily and buck your hips into his hand.

you feel your wrists become free. sore, but free. wooyoung then grabs something from the nightstand, and shuffles with it for a few moments. you hear light buzzing, and your heart jumps a little. fuck, he is doing everything just right. as if he entered your mind and stole all your wishes.

he brings it to your nipple, circling it just like his tongue is circling your clit. you are overwhelmed, struggling to keep still like he instructed.

"wooyoung-" you whine.

"i know, baby. feels so good, doesn't it?" he coos, sending shivers up your spine.

"yeah," you whine again, not quite capable of doing anything else.

"yeah," he hums. "you're doing a very good job, angel. hold on tight for me. don't let go just yet."

he is taking his sweet time, acting like this is only the beginning of a very long movie. you feel like cumming, and you don't want to do that just yet. you're having too much fun, and the buildup is much more pleasurable than the orgasm itself. at least you think so. his voice is soothing, low and raspy, and that alone is enough to make you feel like you came ten times already.

his tongue dives between your folds again, adding the third source of pleasure and shooting arrows to your core. you tremble under his passionate licks, thighs struggling to stay open. he hums into your clit, vibrations matching the ones on your nipple. he spins the gadget around your buds, slowly, then teases the areola again. you hear yourself become louder and louder, and he doesn't seem to mind. it's killing you that you can't see him. he must surely look gorgeous between your legs, working his tongue on you like it's his last feast.

his plush lips close around the tip of your clit, gently tugging it, tongue spinning it in slow circles just how you like it. but today, it all seems a little too slow. you are eager to see just how he will make you cum. maybe you can take two?

"how much longer?" you ask, feeling a bit stupid.

"oh, so much longer. i'm not letting go of you just yet."

the time is slow, and pleasure still bearable. you don't know how much longer you can hold. luckily, he pulls away from you, just in time. you feel his wet digits trail your bottom lip, as if asking permission to enter. you open your mouth, taking in the arousal that exists just for him. you taste yourself on his fingers, working your tongue around them so that you don't just lay completely useless. he hums, watching you swirl around them, and letting them go with a little suck at the end.

"i'm going to make you feel so good, princess. give you the best treatment you'll ever get."

you feel all fluttery and fidgety from his words. you could listen to him forever.

"come here."

you feel him sit behind you, back resting against the wall, and his hands pull you into his lap. your bare back rests against his built chest, and you can't help but hum at the sensation. he chuckles, loving every bit of reaction you have to give him.

"face reveal?" he reads a comment, and you become tense in his hands. "no."

the firm no has you grabbing his thighs, legs automatically spreading for him to continue abusing your clit and hole. his fingers move your hair out of the way of your chest, and gently tuck it behind your ears.

"so pretty." he coos again, leaving a kiss on top of your head.

you melt into his arms at his never ending praises, and you can't get enough. you wish to be called pretty all day long. you wish to be kissed like that for the rest of your life. you love how desired he makes you feel.

"are you real?" you mumble, lost in the soft vibrations that are circling your entrance.

he laughs, then kisses your shoulder. "very much, sweetheart."

"it feels too good. you feel too good."

"i know, baby. i know."

the gadget on your cunt is small, and still at a low speed. he uses his other hand to spread your folds, enough to start inserting the small vibrator inside. you yelp a little, the stretch wider than his fingers.

"easy," he whispers, "just like that..."

he fully inserts it, and you feel so full and in pain.

"i'm not going all the way, don't be afraid."

he pumps the toy in and out of you, enough to get you used to the new stretch. his other hand toys with your clit and tricks your brain into focusing on the pleasure rather than pain.

"wooyoung?"

"yes, love?"

"i thought you said you'd destroy me."

his movements stop. you bite your lip, trying to keep the smirk spreading on your lips. a gasp leaves your lips as his hand grabs your jaw, pulling your head back so that he can look at your face. he gets close, so close that your lips almost touch.

"is that what you want?"

his hot breath is so inviting, but when you reach to kiss him, he moves away, and grabs your jaw firmer.

"you want your tight little cunt to be destroyed? you want me to throw you around and use you like that toy you watched me fuck? you want me to fuck the feeling for the other guy out of you? so that you don't see nobody else but me? so that your pussy only fits on my cock? so that your body only responds to me?"

you are breathless as he spills all his intentions out, with each sentence sending goosebumps all over your body.

"that what you want? for me to fuck you dumb?"

"yes." you simply say.

you expected him to push you down on the bed. you expected him to pull your hair. you expected him to degrade you, spank you, and whatnot. but what you did not expect was the gentle tug of the blindfold, and a caress of your cheek as his grip on your jaw softened. you open your eyes, and meet his dark ones.

"are you sure?" he asks quietly.

"what?" you act dumb.

"you want me to...?"

"i want you to fuck me." you finally say it.

it seems like he has stopped breathing for a moment. he takes a few seconds to examine your face, looking for any signs of hesitation. when he sees none, he places the silk on your hands, tying them up and placing them in your lap.

"i meant what i said," he speaks to you and only you now, back turned towards the camera. "i am going to take a good care of you. remember your safety word?"

"mocha."

"good girl." he places a kiss on your forehead, then pushes you to lay down.

you watch him unbutton his pants, finally seeing more of that v-line you are suddenly very obsessed with. he throws them on the floor, along with the boxers, letting his cock free from the grip of the fabric. your jaw drops at the size. not enormous, but still too big for your virgin self. this is going to hurt like hell.

"can i suck you off?" you ask, subconsciously doing the big eyes thing he so much loves.

"are you sure? i wanted this to be about you."

"i'm sure." you say, eager to get a taste of him. "just, uh... guide me?"

"with pleasure."

he lays on the bed, elbow holding his upper body up as his other hand brings your face close to his cock. you didn't think it would look this clean and... pretty. you stick your tongue out, finally getting a taste of him. he hums, throwing his head back. you lick up from the base to the tip, immediately taking him in your mouth. he gasps, not expecting it so soon. he fills your mouth deliciously, resting against your tongue as his precum spills down your throat. he feels smooth, and very hot.

"god, so good," he groans, hand reaching for your hair to guide you up and down.

you bob your head up and down, too impatient to go slow like he did. you want to hear him more, knowing that you are the reason for those sounds and words.

"even your mouth is so tight, i might cum if you continue." he pulls your head away.

"you're so mean," you whine.

"i know," he coos for the third time today, knowing just what it does to you. "let me take care of you."

you try to lay down, but he holds you in place. you are confused. does he want to jump to some insane positions right away?

"missionary hurts. we will try something else. that good?"

you nod, and he sits against the wall again. he pulls you towards him, finally kissing you again. he showers you with soft kisses, and even though he promised whatnot, you are still experiencing a very soft and gentle version of him. you like it, but the thought of all the things he has listed for you is making your blood boil with excitement.

his hands cup your ass, raising your body and slowly bringing it towards his cock. you look down, noticing that a condom is already sitting on it. when did he manage to do that?

"slow," he whispers, guiding your hips so that you slowly start to sit on him, "just like that. good job."

you yelp at the uncomfortable stretch, and knowing that the pain is yet to come, you put your still tied hands around his neck and rest your head on his shoulder. inch by inch, he disappears inside of you, leaving no space empty. you feel so full and uncomfortable, your teeth sink into his shoulder to stop the loud moans of pain.

"hold onto me, love. it'll be better."

you forget the camera. you forget yunho. you forget san. you forget your feelings towards the other man. you will enjoy this, even if it was your last.

"can i move?"

"yes."

he keeps you close to him, lifting your hips slowly up and down. you hear the comment section flooding, and glance over at the laptop on the nightstand. each money donation makes a sound, and right now, there is tons of them. you enjoy all the praises written in the comments, talking about how well you are taking him, how obedient you are, and how innocent you look. you like it all a little too much.

wooyoung speeds up the pace, hips finally colliding with yours with a bigger force. you don't let go of his shoulder just yet, still focusing on the pleasure and trying to ignore the pain. he is a groaning mess, and little did you know that he has to use every ounce of self control in him to not just slam you on the bed and fuck you open for him. he grips your hips, sure to leave bruises afterwards, and keeps the same pace for a while.

"feeling okay?"

"yeah," you stutter between little gasps and moans.

"can i speed up?"

"yes, please."

the man finally lets himself loose, picking up your body by your waist and moving his own hips instead in a fast pace. your jaw drops, and your eyes roll back from the newfound point of pleasure. you are completely lost in his touch, scent and voice. he is grunting with each push, reaching deep inside of you and touching a particularly sensitive spot you didn't know you had.

"fuck, you're so wet." he hisses. “look how well you take me.”

having enough of the position, he finally throws you against the mattress, yet his gaze still has a hint of worry for you. when you smile, it's his sign to dive into your gardens again. the new position feels odd, and good in a new way. he reaches for a pillow, putting it under your hips for easier access, and finally fulfills his promise.

his hips dive into yours, colliding with force and awaking the orgasm inside of you. the pace isn't fast, it is just right. you have enough time to savour every delicious pump he delivers you.

"i want to cum so bad, please." you beg, feeling a bit overstimulated.

"just a little longer, hm?"

he speeds up the pace, grabbing your waist and practically slamming you against his cock, while his hips stay resting. you feel like that toy, being used like this. you can't help but develop a secret size kink, seeing how easily he is handling you and throwing your body around how he likes it. your eyes catch the gadget near him on the bed, and you grab it. his eyes are focused on the place you're connecting, admiring the view with scrunched eyebrows. he is so into it, that he doesn't even see you put the vibrating gadget on your clit. it is the sudden flood of comments again that makes him look away.

"chasing that orgasm like a thirsty little cumslut?"

you nod eagerly, focusing on the pool of pleasure threatening to spill over. a volcano waiting to erupt. a bottle of champagne waiting to pop.

"wooyoung-"

"go on, baby. i've tortured you enough."

you moan, grabbing his hand for support as you slowly reach the peak.

"cum on my cock like it's your last." he grunts.

it takes you over the edge. a river spilling over the highest cliffs, hitting hard against the pond and creating waves all the way to the shore. it is ripping through your body, and you swear you feel in in the ends of your hair and the tips of your toes. your back arches from the mattress, shaking as shock waves continue to exhaust your body. you are a moaning and whining mess, grabbing anything you can, from his arms and hair, to the mattress and pillows above your head.

"fuck, angel, i'm close too." he warns.

"use me," you whine, still in a hazy state. "use me like that fuck toy."

hearing you speak that way sends him over the edge too, fingers digging into the skin of your waist, and eyes rolling back as he moans and groans. his hips become sloppy, and you feel something warm spill inside of you. it takes a few more pumps for him to come down from his high, and when he is done, he lets himself fall on top of you.

he doesn't speak. doesn't move. just breathes and holds you in his embrace. you lay there for a while, trying to calm your breathing and come back to your senses. with a single tap on the keyboard, he shuts the live off, not even looking at it. he does it that often, he doesn't need to look.

his head finds peace in the space between your shoulder and neck, and his arms caress the place that is full of red marks from his hands. his breathing slows, and when you look down, you realize he has dozed off. you do too, holding him against your chest and replaying everything that just happened.

when you wake up, you see that the sky has gotten darker. you reach for the phone, checking the time so that you won't be late to your arrangement with yunho. but then, you see a notification just underneath the digits showing a young night.

a single message, with an attached screenshot of a very familiar room and familiar nude people.

yunho: i think i'm ready to let go. you've made it so much easier. goodbye.

𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

@minimoniac @miriamxsworld @kodzukein @woomyteez @mulletdaddyjayjo @bae4choi @haatohwa @marvelahsobx @jxhnnyfav

1K notes · View notes

elix8r · 1 year

Text

Pink Whitney (psh)

PAIRING: park sunghoon x fem!reader

GENRES: smut, fluff, crack, college au, friends to lovers au, brother’s best friend au, frat au

WARNINGS: profanity, alcohol, mentions of birth control and Plan B, niki and jungwon causing chaos, one night stands, american college experience, unprotected sex (pls be safe!), mentions of pregnancy, drunk sex, frat parties, oral (m and f receiving), fingering, face-fucking, facial, and overall cuteness :)))))

SUMMARY: You had always trusted the beautiful bottle of Pink Whitney to deliver crazy fun nights with little to no hangovers in the morning. It was almost a sacred bond between you and your go-to drink. But that trust was shattered after a night that should have been like any other. Instead, you found yourself waking up in bed with your younger brother's frat bro, and worse, narrowly avoiding pregnancy. Now, as you navigate the awkward aftermath of it all, you feel betrayed by Pink Whitney, the drink that had never let you down before. But even as you mourn the loss of that trust, you find yourself more worked up over the boy who shattered it.

Fuck Park Sunghoon for ruining Pink Whitney for you or better yet fuck Pink Whitney for making you fall in love with Park Sunghoon.

WORD COUNT: 19k

AUTHOR’S NOTE: this is definitely the fastest i’ve ever written but it’s because i had literally so much fun writing this! So many moments in this story are inspired by real life events and i have loads more of insane college stories that i will definitely be adding on to my upcoming series set in this same universe: The Frat Diaries! I really really hope you guys enjoy reading this and i love hearing feedback so feel free to send them my way! thanks for all the love so far and i’ll see you soon!

GLOSSARY LINK

THE FRAT DIARIES MASTERLIST

Of course, you would much rather be anywhere on a Thursday night (which was still a school night btw!) than at Epsilon Nu’s notorious welcome back party, but a promise was a promise and you couldn’t back out on it. Especially when it was a promise you made to your brother. Jungwon was a relatively easy sibling that rarely asked for much from you so when he came running across campus to you with a request, you couldn’t turn him away.

“I promise it’ll be the best night of your life!” You doubted it but you let him continue rambling as it was becoming almost entertaining with how desperate your younger brother was becoming.

As a first-year and a pledge, he was automatically sent to the bottom of the food chain and in the hierarchy of a fraternity if he didn’t bring anything to the frat, then he could wave his membership goodbye.

“You know I never ask you for anything but if you and your sisters could come then it would help me out and by that, I mean like reaaaaaallly help me out!” His eyes were wide and shimmering towards you.

“Ok fine, I’ll be there. I’ll probably be able to bring a couple of us but I can’t assure you anything.” You finally give in and before you can even finish your sentence, Jungwon was already pulling you into a tight side hug while jumping in glee.

Each pledge was tasked with inviting girls to the party and the more that came under their name would be awarded more points and your brother was aiming to be on the top of that list. He was smart for reaching out for your help as you had the connections to help him out as you were also involved in Greek life. It wouldn’t be hard to convince your sisters to go as you knew many of them were already planning on going but it was the fact that you personally weren’t planning on going until now.

“You won’t regret it! I promise I’ll make sure we’re stocked up on that Pink Whitney shit you like so much and I can even see if Heeseung hyung would be able to pick you and the girls up so you guys won’t have to worry about driving!”

Seeing how excited he was also brought a smile to your face but if you knew what Thursday night had in store for you then you would have most definitely declined and stuck with your original plans of staying back at your sorority house lounging in the new pajama set you bought at Target while starting on assignments you were already given. But you were no fortune-teller and also weak to your brother’s puppy eyes how could you have known?

Winter stood in front of the full-length mirror, frowning as she analyzed her outfit. "Is this cute enough that it gives off the vibe that I’m hot and fun while still being classy or is it giving try-hard slut?" she asked, mostly muttering to herself though. You stood beside her, admiring her fashion sense. Winter was a fashion design major and her exceptional understanding of style always showed in her outfits. The two of you were roommates at the Alpha Epsilon Sigma house and were lucky to have gotten a two-person room, unlike some of your other sisters who had to move into four-girl rooms.

"Don't worry, Winter. You look absolutely gorgeous! You do this every time we go out, but I've never seen you dress bad," you reassured her. Winter's outfit was stunning: a sexy black dress with strategic cutouts that accentuated her figure. You, on the other hand, had opted for a more classic look with a corset top and jeans.

Just then, your phone buzzed with a message from Heeseung saying that he had arrived and before you could even text the other three girls in your group of friends, they burst into the room. Times like this made you wonder if the five of you actually ran on the same brainwave. Without hesitation, everyone ran downstairs and piled into Heeseung's car, Winter sitting on top of Giselle (her big), while Karina and Ningning scrambled to find their seatbelts in the back.

"Hey Heeseung, thanks for this!" you greeted him with a smile, giving him a quick hug. The other girls echoed your sentiment from the backseat. You could say that you were pretty good friends with EpNu's president, as he ran in the same friend group as you not to mention you shared a few classes (and maybe even a few smooches) with him in the past.

"Seriously, don't mention it. It's honestly my pleasure. Plus, I couldn't say no to Jungwon when he asked. I don't know how he does it, but that kid is really good at making you want to do anything for him," Heeseung said, crinkling a warm smile as he navigated the car out onto the road.

"Oh, I know. He's literally so cute! You boys did really good with rush this semester," Karina chimed in from the back. Your big was the VP of Recruitment this year, so she knew exactly how impressive it was to have a successful recruitment.

"They always do. I mean, EpNu's always top tier, which is why I'm even more looking forward to tonight," Ningning's grin widens as she chimes in.

"Damn, now you've got all the pressure on us to deliver to your expectations." Heeseung laughed, playfully acknowledging the challenge, "Well, seriously thanks. And it seems like AES also had no issues getting their top choice in PNMs. A bunch of us drove by all the houses on bid day, and it wasn't a surprise, but you guys definitely did the best."

"Well, you boys better behave tonight because most of our new girls are coming, and they better be treated well. Wonyoung texted me earlier that she, Yujin, and Liz were gonna pre-game before," you informed the group as you approached a familiar house, already bustling with people.

"Thanks, again Heeseung!" you and the girls chimed as he parked, and everyone started getting out. As the group walked towards the door, you spotted a tall boy with a baby face standing in front, obviously on door duty to make sure no guys other than the EpNu brothers were coming in. "Hey, Niki," Heeseung nodded in acknowledgment, and the younger boy reached out for a high-five.

"Welcome in, ladies! Enjoy yourselves and let any of us know if you need anything. You are our guests tonight!" The young pledge, Niki, said with a big smile as he turned to you and the girls. He was obviously full of excitement with the greeting he gave you all.

"Aww, he's so sweet!" Giselle gave the younger boy one of her award-winning smiles, and you and the girls laughed as you could see Niki blushing furiously at the interaction.

Heeseung shook his head, laughing along. "Well, I'm gonna go find the rest of the guys, and like Niki said, find me if you guys need anything. Have fun!" He gave you a small wink before leaving you and the girls in the foyer.

As Heeseung walked away, Winter leaned into you with a mischievous look on her face and poked your side. "Man, Heeseung's so cute, Y/N. I don't know why you've never done anything with him. I mean, he's obviously interested," she whispered.

You playfully rolled your eyes before replying, "I don't know, I think my crush on him just kinda wore off but if you want him, then go ahead."

You then took the opportunity to grab the girls and lead them to the kitchen, eager to get the party started. You knew that’s where they kept the good stuff. And by good stuff, you meant alcohol. You hoped Jungwon wasn't lying about the Pink Whitney.

As you entered the kitchen, you see a few EpNu brothers that you recognized, already drinking and having a good time. They waved at you and the girls, inviting you to join them. You spotted the promised bottle of Pink Whitney sitting in all its glory on the island with a sticky note specifically with your name on it so you didn’t hesitate to reach for it and take a swig. The sweet, tangy taste hit your tongue, and you could feel the alcohol warming you up from the inside.

"Ah, I was wondering when you guys would show up," Jay greeted the group with his usual confident demeanor, reaching for the Pink Whitney bottle on the counter to pour himself a shot. You swatted at his hand, but he was already successful in pouring and knocking back the alcohol. You gave him a glare and punched his arm, but he didn’t even spare you a look as he pretended as if nothing had happened.

"No, Jay, you were wondering when Ningning would come," Karina interjected with a smirk.

"Yeah, you're not very subtle," Giselle added, and you and Winter couldn’t help but giggle as Ningning's cheeks turned pink.

Jake, standing next to Jay, let out a loud cackle. "Damn, bro, they're already on your ass!" He reached over to fist-bump Karina and Giselle, and you all join in on the friendly teasing. Jay always seemed to become the target of everyone's jokes, but his reactions make it all worth it.

"Alright, alright, you girls are ruthless," Jay shook his head sheepishly but didn't try to hide his arms wrapping around Ningning's shoulders.

"Looks like Ningning and I are gonna have to find somewhere else to hang out where there’s more friendlier company. See ya, losers!" he playfully jabbed before leading Ningning out of the kitchen.

You all laugh at his response, waving goodbye to your friends. Despite all the teasing, you couldn't help but think that the two were adorable. While they weren't officially together, everyone knew they were seeing each other semi-seriously, so none of this was a surprise and in fact, you were very much in support of the relationship.

As soon as Jake took a step closer to you, your instincts kicked in and you held the pink bottle closer to yourself. "So Y/N, you're cradling that bottle like it's your baby or something. Not thinking of sharing it anytime soon?" he teased, raising an eyebrow in your direction.

"Oh hell no. If you know Y/N, then you know how precious Pink Whitney is to her," Winter shook her head before adding, "You'll probably have an easier time getting into her pants than getting her to share."

You all chuckle at her remark, but deep down, you knew it was true. Pink Whitney was your absolute favorite drink - a perfect mix of sweetness and potency that always left you having the best night of your life.

"Is that a challenge?" Jake raised an eyebrow in your direction, but you were quick to react in disgust.

"No chance Jake. Get the hell away from me. I don't know what kind of diseases you have with the way you sleep around!" Sure, Jake was attractive - but he was also a notorious womanizer who liked to sleep with anything that moved. You weren’t interested.

"Yeah, get away from her, you horny bastard," Giselle added, teasingly holding you in her arms like a protective mother.

Offended, Jake let out a loud and playful scoff. "Whatever, it's your loss," he said before pouring out four shots of Tito's for himself, Karina, Giselle, and Winter. "None for you, Y/N, since you're not willing to share. Neither am I."

As you watched the three throw their heads back and wince at the afterburn that came with the vodka your eyes started wandering around seeing who else was at the party. You couldn’t seem to locate any of your new sisters and frowned a bit as you were looking forward to seeing the girls. Like Heeseung mentioned earlier, AES definitely got the top picks in PNMs and you really enjoyed this year’s class. You were even hoping on picking up Wonyoung as your little and just at the thought a smile appeared on your face so you decided to shoot the younger girl a text asking if she was here yet.

Another swig from your bottle and you realized that the usual EpNu trio was missing one member.

"Hey, where's your triplet?" you asked Jake, who was now making a concoction for Karina that you knew she would regret tomorrow.

"Why? Wanna fuck Sunghoon instead?" Jake quipped back playfully, and you played along.

"I mean, he has a better chance than you," you joked, "but seriously, you three always go everywhere together. I wouldn't be surprised if you go to the restroom together."

Karina winced as she took a drink from Jake's concoction (you knew it was gonna be bad) before giggling. "Well, actually, we’ve caught them all in the bathroom together before. Do you guys remember--" she started to say before Jake covered her mouth with his hand.

You're flooded with memories of witnessing Sunghoon and Jay holding Jake up, watching as Sunghoon lost a game of rock-paper-scissors to Jay and ended up having to pull the trigger for his friend. It was a cringe-worthy moment that Jake clearly didn’t want to relive, and you couldn’t blame him.

The girls erupted in laughter at the memory, their cackles echoing through the kitchen. Sunghoon's face, twisted in a mix of disgust and determination, before he plunged his fingers down his best friend's throat in a desperate attempt to induce vomiting, was unforgettable. The mere thought of it made him scrub his hands with industrial soap for weeks.

Giselle, struggling to catch her breath between bouts of laughter, managed to gasp out, "That's one of the funniest things I've ever seen!" She turned to Jake, wagging her finger, "Better be careful with your drinks, don't want you to traumatize Jay and Sunghoon again."

Winter, seizing the opportunity, snatched the vodka bottle out of his hand, chuckling to herself. "Speaking of restrooms, I need to go. Anyone else want to follow?"

Without a second thought, Giselle grabbed Winter's hand and dragged her out of the kitchen, blowing kisses and waving to the remaining guests.

Left alone with your big and a pouty Jake, you were about to respond when you felt a sudden force collide with your back. Your brother had arrived, his giddy self already a couple of drinks in. You hugged him back, unable to resist his infectious energy.

"Karina noona, you're here too!" he exclaimed, rushing over to her and hugging her as well. Jake had to pry Jungwon off Karina, holding him still. "Hey, kid, how much have you had? You gotta pace yourself," Jake said, ruffling his hair.

Jungwon hummed, "Seriously, not that much, I promise. I think it's actually the edible finally kicking in." He paused, then added, "Anyways, you don't have to worry. I'm not a lightweight like you, hyung." Jake was left with his mouth agape, stunned by the younger boy's audacity.

"What is this, gang up on Jake day?" he muttered incredulously. “Whatever I’m gonna go find Sunghoon, you guys deal with his drunk ass,” Jake then gave Jungwon a final pinch on the cheek before leaving.

“What’s up his ass?” You and Karina laughed while Jungwon frowned obviously oblivious to all that had happened before his arrival.

Karina once again winced after finishing her drink. "Don't worry about it, baby Yang. Anyways, where've you been?" she asked. You took her cup and grabbed the cranberry juice to make her another drink, confident that your vodka cran would be much easier to handle than whatever Jake had given her.

"Just around with Yeonjun hyung," you heard Jungwon say and from your peripheral you caught your friend becoming much more interested in what Jungwon was saying after the older boy’s name was brought up.

"Where's he at?" you asked, to which your brother pointed vaguely in a direction outside the kitchen.

"Well, I haven't seen him in a bit, so I'm gonna go and see if he wants to catch up," Karina said which leads to you and Jungwon sharing a snicker as the two of you knew this was her way of saying she was going to go and see if he wanted to hook up.

"Use protection, babe!" your brother giggled as you shouted out at her. She flipped you off, but you knew it was all in good fun.

"So, Jungwon, what about you? Anyone on your radar?" you asked, feeling it was your duty to keep tabs on your brother's love life. Who else would protect him from crazy girls if not you, his older sister?

"I mean, I'm not really looking for anything, but..." Jungwon trailed off, and you knew that meant he definitely had someone in mind. So, you decided to probe him further, after all, you were a nosy bitch.

You snaked your arm around his shoulders to pull him closer to you, "C'mon Wonie, you gotta let me in on what's going on! You're always up in my business, so consider this me returning the favor."

"Well..." he began drifting off again, but you gave him a small pinch. "Okay, okay, fine! I don't know, I mean, Wonyoung’s kinda cute," he shyly revealed, his eyes not meeting yours.

Your mouth widened. This was news to you, but you weren't mad at all with his confession. In fact, millions of thoughts on how to bring the two together were flying through your mind. Now that he mentioned it, you thought the two would be absolutely adorable together, and it got you excited.

"Oh my gosh, you have a crush!" you basically screamed out to everyone in the kitchen, and your brother panicked while shushing you.

"Y/N! Shut up!" He attempted to calm you down and unfortunately failed.

"She's coming tonight! Wait, she might already be here!" you quickly checked your phone, and you were right. The younger girl had texted you that she was at the house about 15 minutes ago, and this instantly kick-started your body to go hunt her down.

"Let's go," you said with determination as you dragged Jungwon out of the kitchen, with one arm linked with his and the other still cradling your beloved bottle.

The party was at full force by now, and the sheer number of people was jaw-dropping. But to you, finding your future little was the only thing on your mind.

Outside, Ningning and Jay could be seen conversing with one another on the couch, and you only spared them a small wave. Your brother, on the other hand, mouthed "help" quite dramatically to them, but his cries went unnoticed. Realistically, finding the girl was going to be a challenge, but you were once a freshman like Wonyoung was, so you roughly knew how her mind worked. At least how a freshman sorority girl’s party-hungry mind worked. At a frat party like this, if you weren't by where all the drinks were, then you were most likely where all the dancing was happening. At the EpNu's house, this would be in the basement.

"Y/N, hold on, you don't even know where she is!" You rolled your eyes at your brother's lack of faith in your ability to locate Wonyoung. He seemed to forget that you had a talent for finding people in crowded spaces. But you didn't waste your breath arguing with him.

Descending the stairs to the basement, the music blasted through the speaker system, and the smell of sweat filled your nostrils. You knew that EpNu's parties were always wild, but tonight's was on another level. Bodies swayed and bumped into each other as they danced to the latest pop hit you vaguely remembered hearing from TikTok.

Your brother's complaints by now had faded away, and you both scanned the room, hoping to catch a glimpse of Wonyoung. Suddenly, as if luck was on your side, you spotted Yujin, one of your sorority’s new members and Wonyoung's best friend, dancing with some other familiar faces. You tighten your grip on Jungwon's arm before leading him through the crowd towards your target.

As you approached the group of girls, they greeted you with warm smiles and even a few hugs. It was clear that they were all having a good time, most of them with drinks in their hands. You remembered how you were during your first few parties as a freshman. Those were definitely some of the wildest nights of your life.

"Hey, girls! It's so great to see everyone! I hope you all mentioned Jungwon's name at the front," you said, pushing your brother forward. He awkwardly waved and thanked them, clearly grateful for you coming through in getting him so many names.

"Well I just wanted to stop by and say hi. Have so much fun you guys and stay safe! Oh, and by the way, did any of you come with Wonyoung? I have something of hers that I'd like to return." Your small fib got Yujin to point towards the area where the kegs were located, and you thanked her and waved goodbye to the girls before taking Jungwon's arm once again to move towards your goal.

"Wonyoung! I finally found you!" You hugged her tightly, feeling happy to see her again.

"Oh my gosh, Y/N. I was just about to text you!" Wonyoung exclaimed before noticing the figure behind you.

"Hey, you guys have met before, right?" You tried to introduce Jungwon into the conversation, as naturally as possible.

"Yeah, Jungwon. Nice to see you again!" Wonyoung reached out to give him a small hug, and you could tell even with the dark lighting that he was blushing.

"Hey, Wonyoung! Glad to see you here. Are you having fun?" Jungwon asked shyly. You couldn't help but feel proud of your matchmaking skills. This was already going so well.

"Oh no, babe. You can't have any of that. It's horrible!" You decided to give the two the final push in getting closer and pointed at the keg before turning to Jungwon. "You need to show her where you keep the good stuff." You nudged your brother closer to Wonyoung, and before he could say anything, you walked away, feeling like a successful wingwoman. He definitely owed you one.

As you walked out of the crowd, the smile on your face had you completely distracted, until you suddenly collided with a figure. Your feet failed to find their footing and you dropped straight to the floor, feeling wetness all over your back. Fuck, your Pink Whitney.

“Shit, I’m so sorry! Wait Y/N, fuck are you okay?” The figure quickly picked you up from the floor, but you were too absorbed in mourning the loss of your favorite drink to even register who you ran into.

As you turned your face towards the person with an angry expression, you were ready to cuss them out until you realized it was a face you recognized.

“Oh, Sunghoon,” you awkwardly let out, all the previous expressions leaving your face.

Park Sunghoon was a frequent figure in your life, but you couldn't really say he was one of your closest friends. You were much closer to Jake and Jay than you were to him. The two of you shared many mutual friends and had seen each other at loads of Greek functions and classes, yet moments of just the two of you were next to none. It was always shared with other people, so you could say he was the last person you were expecting.

“Sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was going. You fell kind of hard, are you okay?” His thick brows furrowed in genuine concern as he gave you a once-over to make sure you weren't sporting any immediate damage.

“It’s okay Sunghoon, I wasn’t looking where I was going either. I think I’m okay, just my bottle of Pink Whitney…” You trailed off, looking back down at the bottle now fully emptied out on the grimy floors of the basement.

Sunghoon clearly didn’t even notice this before, as his eyes widened at the sight. “Ugh, Y/N, I’m so sorry,” he reached down to pick the bottle back up when he realized your entire backside was drenched.

“Jesus, it’s all on your hair and back, come on,” and with that, he didn’t hesitate to grab your hand and lead you back up the stairs.

You had never held his hands before, but they were soft and big. Your hands were being dwarfed in his, and you blushed at the realization.

Lost in your thoughts, you failed to recognize what was happening until you found yourself already upstairs with Sunghoon leading the way towards the fraternity's dorms. You notice Karina sitting on Yeonjun's lap, and she shot you a wink while yelling, "make sure to use protection, babe!" Your face turned red with embarrassment as you realized everyone thought you and Sunghoon were heading upstairs to hook up, which was very much not the case. Wait, why was he leading you upstairs in the first place?

"Sunghoon, where are we going?" you finally asked as you reach the top of the stairs.

"My room, duh. You need to change," he responded as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. He takes you to a room far down the left side of the house.

The room took you aback. Firstly, it smelled amazing, like someone has baked fresh cinnamon buns or something, and secondly, it was clean—really clean, considering it was a frat boy's room. The walls were adorned with posters of bands and movies you liked, and the bed was neatly made, with a warm-looking comforter and fluffy pillows. You couldn’t help but feel a little surprised that Sunghoon has kept his room so tidy.

"Wow, your room is really nice," you commented, still taking in the neatness. Sunghoon shrugged as he rummaged through his drawers, searching for something.

"Yeah, I like to keep things tidy. Plus, my mom would kill me if she saw my room in a mess." He chuckled, finally pulling out a t-shirt and a pair of sweats. "Here, you can change into these. The bathroom’s across the hall.”

As you made your way to the bathroom, you couldn't help but smile at the thought of Sunghoon getting scolded by his mom. Unlike the bathroom on the main floor, which was borderline a health hazard, the one that the boys actually used wasn't that bad at all. Of course, it couldn't compare to the amenities of your recently renovated sorority house, but it was surprisingly clean and even had Bath and Body Works foam soap.

As you looked at your reflection in the mirror, you couldn't help but let out a laugh. Your hair was sticking to your body, and your once-white corset top was stained pink with your favorite drink. You cursed at the sight but quickly got undressed to see if you could at least clean yourself up a little bit.

Sunghoon had given you an EpNu formal shirt that smelled like him and a pair of sweatpants that were way too big for you. With your hair pulled up into a messy bun and the oversized shirt and rolled-up sweatpants, you looked a little funky, but it was definitely better than being in your sticky, wet clothes.

When you returned to Sunghoon's room, you found him sitting on his bed, scrolling through his phone, waiting for you to return.

"Hey, seriously sorry about everything," he apologized sheepishly once again. But before he could continue, you cut him off.

"Sunghoon, it's alright. You lent me your clothes, so it's fine. Seriously, stop apologizing," you giggled at his wide-eyed expression.

"Well, I suppose you don't want to go downstairs wearing that, right?" You nodded, not wanting to face your friends looking like a hot mess. Your urge to party was out the window.

"Oh wait, I forgot! Hold on, wait here," Sunghoon suddenly jumped up and ran out of the room, leaving you puzzled. But before you could even step out to see where he went, he returned, holding something in his hand.

Wait, is that...?

"Pink Whitney!" Your face instantly lit up at the sight of your beloved drink, and Sunghoon let out a small laugh at your reaction. The way your entire demeanor changed at the sight of a single bottle of alcohol made him find you even more endearing.

"Wait, where did you get this from?" While not an expensive drink, Pink Whitney wasn't a common item at a frat house. It was stereotypically a sorority girl's drink, which made sense since that's what you were.

"I remembered that one of our pledges, Niki, brought some bottles of alcohol back to the house a couple of days ago, and this was one of them." Ah, Niki was the cute boy you remembered being on door duty.

"I don't want to steal from him!" You shook your head and offered to give the bottle back, but Sunghoon laughed and pushed it back into your arms.

"It's fine, we'll consider it as him providing drinks to a cute girl." You blushed at his words and quickly thanked him.

The room was filled with silence as you sat on his bed and he leaned against his desk. This was probably the longest you've talked to Sunghoon one-on-one, and the awkward tension was palpable.

"Uhm, well, do you want to share?" You finally broke the silence, surprising Sunghoon, who looked confused. He remembered the last time he saw you nursing a bottle of Pink Whitney; you almost beat Jay with the bottle itself for drinking half of it when you weren't looking.

“Are you sure? I mean you’re known for not sharing… I don’t wanna get my ass kicked like Jay,” you rolled your eyes.

With a playful grin, you open the bottle and took a swig of the vodka and pink lemonade straight from the bottle, the sweet and tangy aroma instantly filling the room. "Well, I think I can make an exception for you," you said, passing the bottle to him, who reciprocated your action. As he took a sip, he turned to you in surprise.

"Wait, that actually goes down really easy. You can barely taste the vodka," he exclaimed, finally understanding why you favored the drink so much.

"See, you get it now!" You reached out to take another swig, as Sunghoon moved to sit on his bed next to you.

Suddenly, he asked, "Wanna watch a movie?" It wasn't a bad idea, considering you wanted to drink and didn't feel like going downstairs. You easily agreed and adjusted yourself underneath his cozy duvet, as he reached for the remote.

Netflix popped up on the screen, and the two of you debated over some of the options that were presented to you until something caught both of your attentions.

"Boss Baby?"

You woke up to a dry mouth and a blinding light that made it hard for your eyes to adjust. As you tried to take in your surroundings, confusion only intensified. Where were you? This wasn’t your usual room with your roommate across from you in her pink sheets; instead, you were met with a desk, clothes on the ground, and an empty bottle of Pink Whitney nearby.

Suddenly, a groan came from next to you and an arm tugging your bare waist interrupted your thoughts, making you realize that you were naked next to another nude body. You panic and widened your eyes as you tried to recall how this could've happened. Unlike you, Sunghoon, your friend and now bedmate, was still sound asleep, cuddled up to you with soft snores escaping his lips. The last thing you remember was friendly exchanges and laughter while watching Boss Baby on the screen. How did it end up with you naked in his bed? The thought of you fucking while Boss Baby played in the background made you want to hurl, and you quickly stood up wincing in pain as you felt the tightness in your inner thighs confirming that you did indeed have sex. Nevertheless, you tried your best to ignore the burn and reached for your clothes (well, technically, his) on the floor.

Sunghoon woke up to your movements, letting out a low groan before he realized the situation and sat up in a panic, his face filled with horror. You were half-dressed, wearing only his shirt, when your eyes met. It was as if the two of you were frozen in time, neither knowing how to approach the situation. Fortunately, the awkward tension was broken when the door opened.

“Hey hyung do–” Niki's eyes widened as he took in the scene, and it was as if none of you knew how to move. Before you could say anything to the pledge, his mouth opened, and he screamed out, “Jungwon! Hey Jungwon, come over here quick!” That little shit.

As if on cue, your younger sibling sauntered in with a toothbrush in his mouth, looking barely awake. But as soon as he took in the scene, his mouth immediately widened and toothpaste dropped from his mouth and onto the floor.

“What the fuck!” The scream Jungwon let out was the loudest you think you’ve ever heard your brother being.

By now, Niki could be seen cackling behind Jungwon. The boy you had once thought was a cutie was officially on your shit list. You regretted ever complimenting Heeseung on his group of pledges.

“Why are you naked?” Your brother shrieked out as you struggled to form any words.

“Well they obviously fucked,” Niki once again added more fuel to the fire that he had started not giving a shit about the mess.

“Get out! The both of you!” Sunghoon was finally able to yell out as you walked over to push your brother out and shut the door on the two pledges. Protests from your brother could be heard but your quick reflexes kicked in as you quickly locked the door. Slowly you turned back around to face Sunghoon.

“Shit Sunghoon I don’t remember anything,” you softly said to the boy who had yet to have moved from his bed.

“I don’t either other than fucking Boss Baby.” If this was any other situation, you would be laughing but you weren’t. Obviously, neither of you planned on sleeping with one another so how did you end up like this?

The only culprit your eyes could find was the empty bottle of Pink Whitney lying on the ground. Never once had Miss Whitney done you dirty but here you were with more than half of the night missing from your memories.

You quickly reached down to throw Sunghoon his clothes as you searched for your panties which seemed to be missing.

“What do we do now?” Sunghoon broke the awkward silence. You had no idea I mean you’ve never slept with any of your brother’s friends before and one-night-stands were not really your thing so you were lost for words.

As you tried to gather your mind to respond you realized something that made you freeze. Karina’s words echoed in your mind. “Make sure to use protection babe!”

You quickly scrambled to the small trashcan next to his desk and rummaged around. Out of confusion of your action, Sunghoon moved to hover over you in hopes to figure out what you were doing. He inquired about your actions but you ignored him. There was no evidence of any protection used and you whipped your head towards him.

“Did we use a condom?” Your frantic eyes took Sunghoon aback but he tried his best to remember.

“Uhm I’m not sure… But I’m clean so it’s fine.” No sir, it was indeed not fine as you were recently taken off your birth control as it was giving you lots of hormonal troubles.

“Sunghoon I’m not on birth control!” You screamed out as the color from his face completely drained.

As if a bucket of ice-cold water was poured over you, panic set in as soon as you realized the gravity of the situation. Your heart raced faster than ever before, and adrenaline pumped through your veins like a rushing river. You frantically began putting the sweatpants on, and with a speed you never knew you were capable of, you finished dressing and yanked Sunghoon out of the room. The two of you ran down the stairs, passing by a couple of Sunghoon's bewildered brothers, who looked at the two of you with confusion etched on their faces.

The house was a complete mess, but that was the least of your concerns at the moment. As you reached the bottom of the stairs, you spotted your brother still in shock on the couch, with Niki and Jake flanking him on either side. He got up, ready to confront the both of you, but instead, you pushed him aside and made a beeline for the door.

"Where are you going?" He screamed out, trying to chase after you.

"She's not on birth control!" Was all Sunghoon could yell out before he followed you to his car, and you both quickly got in.

“What the fuck! You got my sister pregnant?!” Was what most of the EpNu brothers woke up to that lovely Friday morning.

You have always been an advocate for safe sex yet here you were sitting on the hood of Sunghoon’s car reading the directions on how to take Plan B. He was peering intensely at you with the bottle of water clenched tightly in his hands.

You gingerly popped the pill out of its package and said a little prayer before popping it and chugging the water that Sunghoon was holding. The $50 pill had better work, or you'd be suing.

Sunghoon looked at you with concern still present on his face. The two of you had run into the pharmacy demanding the morning-after pill, looking like a couple of hot messes. “Are we good now?” he asked tentatively.

“I mean, probably. If not, I'm actually going to sue Plan B," you responded with a stern tone, making Sunghoon wonder whether you were serious or not. He wisely chose not to question you and nodded in agreement.

As you drove back to the house, the silence was palpable, but the panic had subsided. You were still reeling from the fact that you had slept with Sunghoon.

“You think Jungwon’s gonna kill me?” Sunghoon's question made you chuckle, despite the tension that lingered in the air. You knew your brother Jungwon didn't have a violent bone in his body, but then again you had also never been in any situation like this before so you really didn’t know.

"I mean, he can try, but I doubt it'll be fatal. You've got a good couple of inches over him, you'll be fine," you reassured Sunghoon, but this didn’t do much to ease the boy.

He did bring up a good point though as you knew that dealing with Jungwon was going to be a pain in the ass. While he had never had issues pertaining to your love life, it had also never involved a friend of his before. The fact that he was present to witness the aftermath of you and Sunghoon's drunken hookup made your head pound with worry. As Sunghoon parked the car back at the house, you braced yourself for the inevitable confrontation with your brother.

“You gotta hold me back if we see Niki, I might actually go after him,” you grumbled while walking up to the door.

"Go ahead, I'm not gonna hold you back. He deserves it," Sunghoon laughed, momentarily easing the anxiety in your chest. But as soon as you entered the house, the anxiety came back with a vengeance.

The two of you were met with multiple pairs of eyes staring straight at you. It was as if everyone was waiting on the couch for the two of you to get back. Then out of nowhere, you see Ningning running up to you and giving you a tight hug.

“Jake ran around the whole house screaming that Sunghoon got you pregnant!” She cupped (more like squished) your cheeks together as she harbored wide eyes.

Your face wrinkled at what she said and you quickly whipped your body to the said boy who seemed to be looking around at everything but your eyes.

“Jake, what the fuck? I’m not pregnant!” He still had a hard time meeting your eyes indicating guilt.

“I’m sorry Y/N! You know how dramatic I get! I just couldn’t believe something like this was happening to someone else for once and not me!” His pathetic excuse caused a couple of his brothers to shake their heads in hopes to distance themselves from the Australian’s failed attempts at justifying his actions.

This group of boys was certainly going to take you to an early grave, and you could do nothing but roll your eyes and let out a sigh before searching for your brother. Surprisingly, he was not present in the group of people (hyenas) waiting at the door for you and Sunghoon's return.

“Where’s Jungwon?” You asked the group and Jay pointed up towards Jungwon’s room.

“I think he’s lowkey traumatized. It’s fine though, Heeseung hyung is with him.” You nodded at Jay and turned around marching up to his room.

You knocked on the door, but there was no immediate response. As you raised your hand to try again, the door opened, and Heeseung greeted you. "Oh, hey Y/N," he scratched his head awkwardly. There was a moment a silence before he spoke again. "Well, I have to get to class, so I'll leave you two to it. Bye, Jungwon. See you later," he said and before you could even say anything back, he left leaving you alone with your brother.

Unlike Sunghoon, Jungwon had a roommate, probably Niki, making his living space cramped and messy. A small moment of silence passed between the two of you before you decided to speak up.

"Sorry for this morning," you said, unsure of how he would respond. But instead of being upset, Jungwon looked genuinely confused.

"What are you sorry for?" he asked, furrowing his eyebrows. You were taken aback by his response, as you had expected tension between the two of you after the scene he made earlier that morning.

You paused for a moment, trying to gather your thoughts. "I thought you were upset with me for...what happened," you said, not wanting to bring up the embarrassing details of the previous night.

Jungwon's expression softened. "Oh, no, I was just...surprised, I guess. I mean yeah I was kinda mad that you slept with one of the guys that I was hoping would be my big, well now thinking of it I don’t know if I want my big to be someone who’s been inside of my sister–" you quickly cut him off before he was able to continue on further.

“Ok, I get it no need to go into details!” You protested waving your hands at him as if that would immediately erase what he had just said. Your brother seemed more nonchalant than you though as he just shruged.

“I mean, you were the one doing stuff with Sunghoon hyung, not me! But anyways, I’m probably more mad at him than you. Maybe I’ll drag it along a little further with him. Make him my bitch for a little bit,” he said with an almost mischievous look in his eyes, clearly relishing the idea of getting revenge on his fraternity brother. You couldn’t help but raise an incredulous eyebrow at your brother's words and made a mental note to keep him away from Niki, who you were sure was making an influence on him.

“Like it’s fine though. Well, not really. It’s gross but whatever I’m not going to judge you for who you sleep with 'cause you don’t do that to me.” You couldn’t help but feel grateful for your brother's words as it was clear that he didn’t want to make things awkward between the two of you.

“Actually, I do judge you, but I just don't say it out loud all the time,” you teased, hoping to ease the tension. Your brother rolled his eyes at you, but he couldn’t hide the small smile forming on his face.

“But seriously, neither of us planned this, and we don't remember what happened. So it's almost as if it didn't actually happen,” you explained, hoping to put the situation to rest. “You can forget about all of this because I promise you, I won't be sleeping with Sunghoon, or any of your fraternity brothers anytime soon.”

You meant what you said. Sunghoon was a mistake, and you blamed it solely on Pink Whitney (and maybe Boss Baby).

“So, I’m guessing you took care of the whole potential pregnancy situation? Because I don’t think I’m ready to be an uncle,” Jungwon asked, his expression serious. You had completely forgotten about that whole part of the ordeal as your stress about Jungwon overpowered everything else.

“Yeah, we were quick to do a fetus deletus. Plan B was fucking expensive, but I made Sunghoon pay,” you said with a slight shrug. The thought of raising a child right now was terrifying. After all, you were just starting your second year in college.

Jungwon shook his head before piping up in a much less serious tone. “Have you seen those TikToks of people showing how they were raised by frats and sororities because their parents got knocked up in college? They’re kinda wholesome. Like EpNu could've had your kid as a mascot or something.”

You rolled your eyes, thinking about the idea of your non-existent child being raised by the Epsilon Nu brothers (specifically Jake). “Not happening, at least not to me. So, you can let go of that fantasy of yours,” you said firmly before standing up and heading downstairs, with Jungwon following closely behind.

To say the week after the party was unremarkable was an understatement. In fact, you were surprised at how fast people got over what had happened seeing as they made such a big deal out of it on Friday morning, but you weren’t complaining. Sure the rumor of you being knocked up by Sunghoon (once again, thanks Jake) was passed around like a disease with the amount of YikYak posts talking about how you were getting kicked out of your sorority for being pregnant but as soon as you showed up to class on Monday in your letters, everyone went quiet realizing that none of it was true. Plus, the glares that Karina shot at the new members during chapter the second she saw anyone whisper or point at you was quite effective.

“So are your parents coming down for the weekend?” Winter asked out of nowhere while she plucked her eyebrows. You on the other hand was furiously typing away on ChatGPT to see if it could help you obtain sources for an upcoming paper so her question failed to register in your mind.

“Huh?” Your fingers still continued to type as you slowly peeled your eyes away from your screen to face your best friend.

“Parent’s Weekend? Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten I mean both of your parents’ kids are in Greek so I’m guessing they’re both coming at least for the game.” To be honest, you had in fact totally forgotten about reminding your parents about coming but you were sure that your brother at least would have brought it up to them.

“Shit, I totally forgot. Thanks for reminding me I’m gonna call Mom right now,” you thanked her before grabbing your phone and running downstairs to go outside on the porch.

It took a couple of rings before your mother answered and you were met with her familiar sweet voice, “Hey honey!” A smile instantly lit up on your face.

“Hey Mom, sorry it’s been a while since I’ve called,” you started the conversation, guilt creeping in for not keeping in touch with your parents as much as you should have. “I was just wondering if you and Dad were gonna come down this weekend? Jungwon probably already told you Parent’s Weekend and the game, but I know the both of us would really love having the two of you guys here.”

As your parents were big fans of football, you knew that your parents were most likely coming. Your mom's response confirmed your assumption, "Yes, your brother did actually call a few days ago. He specifically emphasized Epsilon Nu’s tailgate and how it was going to be amazing. Of course, your father is much more thrilled about that than I am, but I’m just happy to see both my babies."

You grinned at her words. It was nice to hear her voice again. You missed her and your dad. “That's great to hear, Mom. I can’t wait for you guys to meet some of the new girls. I know the girls would love to see you guys again. Oh, and you have to meet Wonyoung! Jungwon’s got a major crush one her,” you gushed out to her.

As soon as she heard you, you could feel your mother’s excitement at what you had just said, “Oh my goodness, of course, he didn’t mention anything! What’s she like? Is she an AES girl?”

You laughed at her eagerness, “She’s such a sweetie and she’s in the pledge class below me so I’ve actually been eyeing her as a potential little. I’ve been really hoping she felt the same way. You’d really like her.” It was as if you had the Midas touch as ever since you forced Jungwon to get closer to Wonyoung, they’ve actually been hitting it off well. He even texted you earlier today asking if you knew her schedule as he wanted to go pick her up after class.

“Wow, that’s wonderful!” Your mom exclaimed. “I can’t wait to meet her. It sounds like your brother is adjusting well to HybeU. How about you, honey? How’s your second year going so far? Any special boys catch your eye?” At her question, your mind instantly went to Sunghoon.

Wait what the fuck. You were taken aback at what you had just done, but you did your best to brush it off and get back to answering your mom.

“It’s going great, Mom. Classes are good, and the house is amazing. No boys, though. Well, anyways I actually have to go back to working on my paper, but I can’t wait to see you this weekend. Love you and tell Dad I love him too. Bye!” As your mother bid you goodbye and you ended the call, your mind went back to Sunghoon. Why did he pop back into your mind out of nowhere? You were definitely confused but decided not to probe your mind further and tried your best to focus back on your paper.

As Saturday quickly arrived, you found yourself sitting in front of your vanity, carefully adding finishing touches to your makeup. Ningning and Giselle were stationed on the floor, equally focused on getting their makeup just right. On the other hand, like always, Winter was furiously debating over her clothing choices for the day. The last of your group, Karina, was probably somewhere downstairs running around and putting final touches on the house as she was tasked with making sure the sorority house looked flawless for the parents.

“Where are you guys tailgating?” Giselle asked the group. You knew that you were obviously going to head over to the Epsilon Nu house with your parents to see your brother. You also assumed Ningning would probably be going there as well as she previously mentioned wanting to introduce Jay to her parents.

“Well, I was actually thinking about stopping by the SKZ house just cause I heard there was going to be a mechanic bull,” Winter said while finally deciding on a scarf top and a fringed bottom.

“Wait I heard that too! My lab partner, Felix was talking about it the other day,” added Giselle, fully convinced by the idea of a mechanical bull.

“That honestly sounds like so much fun, but surprise surprise, I’ll be over at EpNu for obvious reasons,” you said and Ningning shot you an agreeing smile before spraying her face down with an excessive amount of setting spray.

“What, to introduce your baby daddy to your parents or for Jungwon,” at Winter’s playful remark you quickly threw one of your decorative pillows at her head which she ducked to avoid just in time. You rolled your eyes at the three who were giggling but you knew that the small jokes that your friends had been making all week were all out of fun and harmless so you didn’t actually mind at all.

“I swear if you guys say anything like that in front of my parents, I will actually kill you,” to which the girls laughed out loud again. You were of course joking as you knew they wouldn’t do anything like that to make you actually uncomfortable. These were your girls and though you had known them for roughly a year, they already felt like lifelong friends to you.

As if on cue, your phone vibrated, alerting you of a text message from your parents, informing you of their arrival. Hastily, you got up, grabbing your clear purse that was stuffed with your essentials - a small case of Advil, sunglasses, your beloved Dior lip oil, and your sorority stickers and pin. "C’mon, girls. My parents are here. They want to say hi before we head out to see Jungwon," you said and everyone followed suit, grabbing their belongings, and heading down to the foyer.

As you made your way downstairs, the house was already abuzz with parents. You easily spotted your parents as your mother's recognizable laugh drew you to them. Karina could already be seen giving them a warm welcome, and you saw your mother continuing to laugh while your dad smiled at whatever your big was telling them.

"Mom, Dad!" you rushed over to give them each a hug. The girls followed suit as they were already well acquainted with your parents.

"Oh, all you girls look so lovely today!" Your mother beamed at the five of you. It was no secret that your parents deeply approved of your group of friends that you made at HybeU, even inviting them over to your place for a month over the summer.

"Yes, and the house also looks amazing. I'm guessing Miss Karina had something to do with that?" Your father added, winking at Karina. He was right; while the house always looked great with its marble floor and chandelier, Karina's touch with peonies all over the place elevated it even more. As your friends continue conversing with your parents, you heard someone call your name.

"Y/N!" You turned around to see Wonyoung waving at you with her parents next to her, looking at you with warm smiles. You had already met them before on bid day. "Oh, hey Wonyoung," you greeted her and you could see lights go off in your mother's mind as she heard her name. "Hey guys, this is Wonyoung. I've told you guys about her," you introduced her and her parents to your own.

Soon enough, the rest of your friends' parents also found their daughters, and the group all seemed to be getting along well as small talk was shared between everyone. Suddenly, a text from Jungwon interrupted the friendly conversation, reminding you and your parents that you had a place to be. With this, everyone bid your family goodbye before the three of you headed out making your way towards your brother’s frat house.

The drive to your Jungwon's frat house was short, a mere 7-minute ride away from your sorority's house. As you approached the house, you saw the lawn full of friends and family alike, all sporting a drink in their hands while enjoying whatever was on the grill. Jungwon was easy to spot and as soon as he saw you and your parents walking towards him, his face lit up with excitement. He greeted your parents with a warm hug equally enthusiastic to the one you gave them, and didn’t hesitate to lead your dad to meet the other dads by the grill. You and your mom followed closely behind.

As you made your way through the crowd, someone offered you a freshly grilled hotdog, which you eagerly accepted. You savored the juicy flavors, when your mother nudged you before saying, "So Jungwon, we just met Wonyoung and she seems like such a lovely young woman. I can see why you’re so fond of her."

Jungwon, who was in the middle of taking a sip of his White Claw, choked and coughed, trying to regain his composure. His face turned red, and your dad had to pat his back a few times to help him breathe. You couldn’t help but laugh at your brother's discomfort, while your mother feigned ignorance to his reaction and gave him a wink indicating that she knew all about their relationship already, courtesy of you.

"Uh, yeah, Wonyoung's great," Jungwon finally managed to say. "I'm glad you guys got to meet her."

You could sense your brother sending you a look of annoyance at you for bringing Wonyoung up to your parents before he could have had a chance to, but you ignored him and continued to laugh with your parents.

You went in to take another bite of the hotdog when you heard your brother say, “Oh, yeah Mom, Dad you have to meet Sunghoon hyung, I’m hoping for him to be my big,” and with that, he turned around and called an unsuspecting Sunghoon over. “Hyung come and meet my parents!” Now it was your turn to choke on your food. You couldn’t believe that your little shit of a brother just Uno reversed you. Touché Jungwon touché.

Sunghoon was taken aback when Jungwon's voice called him over. He was enjoying a drink with Heeseung, their parents engaged in conversation nearby. Jungwon motioned for Sunghoon to join them, and he quickly informed his parents and Heeseung of his departure before making his way towards the group. As he approached, he noticed the two individuals standing beside Jungwon, whom he assumed were your parents. And there you were behind them, seemingly coughing furiously.

As you were recovering from choking, you realized that this was the first time you’d seen Sunghoon since Friday morning. You couldn’t help but check him out. Fuck, he looked real good with his black hair flopping perfectly down his face and school jersey that fit him perfectly. The single gold chain that he was sporting around his neck alone was about to send you into a frenzy.

Sunghoon also noted how pretty you looked however, his thoughts were quickly overtaken by his skepticism of this whole thing. Jungwon had been making him do every little task imaginable during the past week. It started innocently enough, with Jungwon asking for a cup of water or help with assignments from his introductory classes. But the requests escalated, reaching a point where Jungwon even made him go on an alcohol run, a duty specifically assigned to pledges. When Sunghoon tried to protest, Jungwon guilt-tripped him with a dramatic monologue about his traumatized state after witnessing his sister half-naked in Sunghoon's room. Before he knew it, Sunghoon found himself already halfway on his way to the liquor store. Jungwon was diabolical, and Sunghoon couldn't help but think this was his punishment from the heavens for having unprotected sex.

“This is Sunghoon hyung! He’s been one of the guys that took me in with open arms and showed me the ropes around campus and the frat when the semester first started,” Jungwon tightly wrapped his arms around Sunghoon’s shoulder while excitedly introducing him to your parents.

Secretly in Jungwon’s mind, he was laughing his ass off relishing in this. Jungwon was killing two birds with one stone as he was not only getting back at you for telling Mom about Wonyoung and also just messing with Sunghoon for sleeping with you.

"Actually, Sunghoon and Y/N are really close too," Jungwon added with a sly grin. "I believe he even bought her a nice gift last week, worth around $50 or something." He pretended to ponder the details.

Your parents remained oblivious as they greeted Sunghoon, but both he and you were taken aback by Jungwon's audacity. Sunghoon found it difficult to meet your parents' eyes, especially your father's, but he mustered his composure and extended his hand for a handshake.

"Oh, you sound like such a sweetheart!" Your mother exclaimed, already won over by the boy and clearly proud of the company her two children were keeping at school.

"Absolutely, son. It's a pleasure to meet you," your father chimed in a wide grin on his face. He even reached down from the cooler to hand Sunghoon a can of beer, a gesture symbolizing his gratitude.

Out of nowhere, Sunghoon felt a hand come down his shoulders and as he turned around he saw that his parents had joined him.

A sigh of relief escaped Sunghoon as he sensed your own tension easing upon the arrival of his parents. Your eyes met, conveying a shared feeling of relief, before diverting your attention back to his parents, warmly introducing yourself to them.

"I can already tell how well-behaved your son is, not to mention how handsome!" your mother complimented Sunghoon to his mother. The two women giggled, clearly getting along and enjoying each other's company. The topic swiftly shifted to the upcoming game, with your fathers also having no trouble engaging in a discussion about their predictions. They were so engrossed in their conversation that they failed to notice you harshly slapping the back of your brother's head.

“You fuckhead, you’re such a little shit. I actually hate you so much, I can’t believe you actually did that,” you uttered in a low voice, ensuring none of the parents could overhear. However, the anger in your tone was evident to your brother, and Jungwon started to feel a twinge of fear under the intense gazes both you and Sunghoon were directing at him.

Fortunately (at least for Jungwon), your dad spoke up, extending an invitation to the Parks inviting them to join your family in the stands if they didn't have any other plans. Sunghoon's parents gratefully accepted the offer without hesitation, and as the group made their way toward the school's stadium, you caught sight of a familiar figure across the lawn. It was Ningning, accompanied by Jay and both sets of parents. They all appeared to be getting along well, which made you smile, and you started waving at Ningning, who returned the gesture. However, her expression shifted to one of confusion before a sly smile took over as she noticed the company you were in. She nudged Jay, drawing his attention to you, and the two of them burst into laughter, clearly finding amusement in your current situation. Sunghoon also notices their behavior and sends them a quick finger while rolling his eyes at their antics before guiding you back toward the stadium.

The sun beat down mercilessly as your group finally found a good spot in the stands. Your mom and Sunghoon's mom decided to go to the restrooms while also offering to fetch some water for everyone before the game began. Meanwhile, your dads continued their conversation, and Jungwon appeared engrossed in something on his phone, most likely Wonyoung, you presumed. Silently, you and Sunghoon sat next to each other.

As you were about to say something, he beat you to it, “Think you got enough in there to spare me one?” His smile was playful as he pointed at the plethora of gameday stickers in your bag which reminded you that you had yet to fully decorate everyone in them.

“Yes, of course! I totally forgot about these,” you quickly said before taking them out and handing him one. You proceeded to put one on your brother and offered them to your dad and even to Sunghoon's dad as well.

Everyone gladly accepted the stickers, eager to represent your sorority. Your brother, however, delved further into your bag, searching for more to wear.

"Here, take this," he said suddenly, passing what seemed like a spare pin you had in your bag to Sunghoon. The pins were not as readily distributed as the stickers since they were typically worn by sorority members or their significant others. You knew what Jungwon was up to when he handed a pin to Sunghoon, but before you could say anything, Sunghoon didn't hesitate to accept it and pin it to his shirt.

The nonchalant way in which he accepted one of your pins caught you off guard and caused a blush to rise to your cheeks. While Sunghoon was undeniably one of the most attractive guys you had ever met and always kind, he had never really captured your attention before. So, what had changed now to make you feel this way toward him?

Lost in your thoughts, you were snapped back to reality by the return of Sunghoon's mother and your own, carrying cold and refreshing drinks. Gratefully, you accepted one and gulped down the water, hoping it would quell the butterflies fluttering in your stomach because of the boy sitting next to you.

"Oh, you guys look so cute with the matching pins! Perfect for the game. Come on, let me get a quick photo of you two before it starts," Sunghoon's mom exclaimed excitedly as she noticed the pin that had previously not been on her son's shirt, swiftly grabbing her phone.

"Mom, I think we're fine. You don't—" Sunghoon tried to protest, but his mother paid no heed, cutting him off and insisting on taking a picture. Following suit, your mother pulled out her phone, eager to capture the moment as well.

Unable to resist their wishes, you and Sunghoon obliged, striking a pose. His arm draped effortlessly around your waist as you leaned closer to him, both of you wearing beaming smiles. Soon after, your brother was ushered to join, and the parents took turns capturing photos of the three of you before the game finally started.

During the kickoff, your phone buzzed with a text notification from your mom. Opening it, you found that she had sent over the pictures taken moments ago. Another text arrived, causing you to look up at your mother, who gave you a subtle wink.

“No boys my ass. He’s a cute one.”

Anticipation had filled the air as everyone gathered for the game, confident that your school would emerge victorious. As the final whistle blew and the outcome proved them right, the festive mood carried on well into the night. However, the time had come for you and your parents to bid farewell to the group and make your way to the sorority's dinner, specially arranged for Parent's Weekend. Parting ways with the rest of the group, you couldn't help but appreciate the sight of everyone getting along. Surprisingly, even Sunghoon appeared less tense around your dad, their bond strengthened through the shared excitement of the game. Your parents even exchanged contact information before saying their goodbyes, showering your brother with warm hugs before he joined Sunghoon and his parents, who kindly offered him a ride back to the frat house.

The remainder of the night unfolded smoothly as your parents enjoyed their dinner, engrossed in conversations with other parents at the table. The topic of Sunghoon didn't resurface for the rest of the evening, as everyone was caught up in socializing and making connections. Even you, for a brief moment, managed to forget that you had spent nearly the entire day in Sunghoon's presence. However, that respite of course vanished the second you walked into your room.

To your surprise, Ningning and Giselle were seated on Winter's bed, sharing a bag of chips when you walked in. Their unexpected presence caught you off guard, especially since your actual roommate wasn't even around. As soon as they laid eyes on you, they bombarded you with a barrage of questions, eager for all the details.

"What happened? Ningning told me she saw you with Sunghoon and his parents!" Giselle quickly ushered you to sit between her and Ningning, the latter's hand freezing mid-air as she pulled it back from the chip bag, eager to not miss a single detail of your story.

"It was all Jungwon. I spilled the beans to Mom about him and Wonyoung, so he decided to get back at me by introducing Sunghoon to our parents," Ningning snickered, earning a disapproving look from you before you continued. "It was so fucking awkward, I swear I thought I was going to strangle Jungwon right then and there. He even mentioned how Sunghoon supposedly 'bought me a $50 gift,' and Sunghoon looked like he was going to pass out next to my dad." At this, neither could contain their giggles which in turn transformed into full-fledged cackles with Giselle even seeming to be sporting tears.

"Hold on a sec, Karina needs to be here for this," Ningning exclaimed before rushing out the door to find your big.

"Where's Winter?" you asked Giselle, as her laughter started to subside.

Giselle wiped at her teary eyes. "Oh, I introduced her to Felix, the SKZ lab partner I mentioned earlier, at the tailgate and they hit it off really well. Like she was with him the whole day and is at the SKZ house right now. She’s probably partying with him."

You noded, at least your roommate was having fun living her best life. The door then slammed open, as Ningning returned hand in hand with Karina. Karina swiftly took a seat on the ottoman next to Winter's bed, eagerly requesting you to recount what she had just heard from Ningning. Unsurprisingly, she joined in the chorus of laughter as you told her exactly what you told the other two, "Fuck, Y/N your little brother is an absolute legend!"

"Whatever. If my dad ever found out what those fifty dollars were actually spent on, Sunghoon would probably be six feet under by now," you muttered, silently grateful that your brother didn't delve further into the specifics.

You decided to shift the focus away from yourself and directed it towards Ningning, who seemed to have had an eventful day as well. "Hey, how did your parents like Jay?" you inquired, and her face immediately lit up. She eagerly delved into how her parents adored Jay and even extended an invitation for him to come visit their home one day. Ningning also revealed that she and Jay discussed taking their relationship to the next level and making it official, prompting squeals of joy from you and the other girls. Finally, you thought, it took them long enough.

Suddenly, Karina gasped, capturing everyone's attention to her phone. "Y/N, look at what Sunghoon just posted on Instagram!" She thrusted her phone in front of your face, revealing the photo that was taken by your moms posted with the caption, "Thanks, Mom, for this one! Also, peep the matching pins :)"

Your jaw dropped in astonishment, and you instinctively reached for your phone to confirm the post's existence. More squeals fill the room as the other girls examined the post. Your notifications confirmed that Sunghoon indeed shared the photo, as Instagram alerted you that you were tagged in a post.

"Y/N, he definitely likes you! There's no way he would post you on his main if he wasn't interested," Giselle exclaimed, her eyes brimming with excitement as she swiftly liked the post and contemplated a comment.

Ningning fervently nodded in agreement. "The caption says it all!"

However, you were too shocked to respond to the girls' remarks. Could they be right? Did Sunghoon actually have feelings for you?

"Not just a sticker, but a pin," Karina wiggled her eyebrows while nudging you. "You sly girl, it's like you were claiming him."

"No, that was Jungwon’s doing again," you rolled your eyes, yet deep down, you wondered if Jungwon's mischievous act inadvertently worked in your favor. Was this his way of paying you back for what you had done for him with Wonyoung on Thursday night?

"All right, but the real question is: Do you like Sunghoon?" Giselle's question hung in the air, causing the room to fall silent as all eyes focused on you.

"Um, I'm not sure," you pondered, feeling a blush creeping up your cheeks. "Honestly, I've never really paid much attention to Sunghoon before this semester like he’s just been one of the guys in our friend group, but after the party, he keeps coming up in my thoughts. I'm not sure if that means I like him, but maybe?" Your answer seemed to have left the girls satisfied as they enveloped you in tight hugs.

"Oh my gosh, my baby's in love!" Karina dramatically exclaimed, pretending to wipe away tears.

"I never said I was in love with him!" you retorted playfully, though a smile graced your face as the realization that you might have a crush on Sunghoon sank in.

"You have to text him right now!" Ningning insisted, passing your phone to you and urging you to open the messaging app swiftly.

"What am I supposed to say? Don't you think it's weird for me to text him out of the blue?" You felt a hint of apprehension, unsure about taking the plunge.

"Babe, you literally spent the whole day with him, and he just posted a picture with you! He practically made the first move and is begging you to react!" Giselle interjected, snatching your phone from your hand and swiftly typing something, with the other girls huddled by her side, nodding in approval.

"Here, send this," she said, and as you read the message she wrote, you were impressed. It sounded natural and confident:

"Just saw the post. Feeling honored to have made it to the main, but you do realize this means you won't be able to rep any other sorority from now on?"

"You have to send it, Y/N. It's perfect," Karina pleaded, her excitement palpable. Your finger hovered over the send button, contemplating whether to go through with it or not. Saying a small prayer, you took a deep breath and pressed the button, unleashing a wave of anticipation.

You gasped in excitement as you saw the typing indicator appear instantly, and the room filled with a collective hush as everyone gathered around the phone, their eyes fixed on the screen, waiting anxiously for Sunghoon's response. And then, the message appeared:

"Wouldn't dream of it ;)"

In an instant, everyone in the Alpha Epsilon Sigma house could hear screams of joy erupting from your room.

The following two weeks breezed by, filled with steady and playful exchanges between you and Sunghoon. You were pleasantly surprised by how genuinely funny he was, as his late-night texts consistently left you in fits of laughter, desperately trying to stifle your giggles so as not to wake up Winter. It was remarkable to think that you and Sunghoon hadn't had much one-on-one interaction before this semester because his personality complemented yours so perfectly. The two of you were quick to make a habit of walking to classes together and you even found yourself going over to his every other night to watch Love Island. Spending time with him suddenly became the highlight of your days. Even your friends were picking up on how well the relationship was developing based on your mood. Just last night, Jungwon (who was also still upset with the fact that Sunghoon only posted the photo of you two and none that included him) even texted you, telling you to stop distracting Sunghoon from their big/little bonding dinner. He even went as far as to complain about how he felt like a third wheel. It was safe to say that the both of you were completely smitten with each other.

While your social life seemed to be thriving, school on the other hand was not as kind to you. You were really struggling with a couple of the assignments, specifically a 12-page sociology paper that you were only halfway done with that was due tomorrow. Clearly, procrastination was something you struggled with. Determined to find a conducive environment that could fuel you to stay concentrated on finishing it by tonight, you decided to head to the library. As you typed away on your computer, nodding your head to the rhythm of the music flowing through your headphones, a cup of iced coffee suddenly materialized before you.

You whipped your head around to be greeted with Sunghoon's familiar dimpled smile. He was casually dressed in an EpNu shirt and gray sweatpants with his backpack lazily hung over one shoulder, but he looked effortlessly attractive like it was borderline criminal that it caused an immediate smile to spread across your face.

"It's for you," he said, his smile still beaming. "I noticed you were here and thought you could use a little pick-me-up." He was absolutely right, and you gratefully reach over to take a sip of the coffee, feeling already an instant rejuvenation and you let out a sigh of relief.

"You're an angel, Park Sunghoon, I swear," you exclaimed, to which he chuckled. "Wanna join me?" You gestured to the empty space in front of you, and he nodded before settling down across from you and unpacking his belongings.

"Studying for an upcoming exam?" he questioned, gesturing towards the open book beside your computer.

"No, it's a paper, but it's sucking all the energy out of me. I have to write 12 pages by tomorrow, and it's been a struggle. So, expect me to be here all night," you admited, feeling the stress weigh on you. However, deep down, you knew you were more than capable if you just focused hard enough.

He exhaled audibly upon hearing your plans before offering, "I could keep you company until you finish. If you're okay with that, of course."

His response caught you off guard, and your eyes widened. "Oh, no, seriously, you don't have to do that. I don't want you to waste your night here with me when you probably have better things to do," you quickly dismissed his offer, feeling that it would be too unfair to accept.

"Y/N, you do realize that I'm also a student, right?" he chuckled lightly before adding, "I have an anatomy test next week that I've been putting off, so this will help me out too."

Although you still felt a twinge of guilt, knowing that he had his own studying to do eased your mind. "Okay, well, in that case, you're more than welcome. But seriously, don't feel obligated to wait for me to finish. If you're done studying and want to leave, go ahead!"

With a nod of agreement, he retrieved his computer and textbook. Hours slipped by unnoticed as you delved deeper into your essay, your focus unwavering. It was only when you by chance took a glance outside that you realized the sun had long disappeared, leaving behind the blanket of a starry night sky. You now only had a couple of pages left before you would be able to submit your assignment. Sunghoon, too, has been deep in concentration, his handsome face displaying a serious expression. Though you exchanged words from time to time, you both managed to dive back into your work seamlessly. If you had known that studying with Sunghoon could be so enjoyable and productive, you would have made him your study buddy much earlier.

"Wanna take a break?" he broke the silence as you finished a sentence, and you looked up to see him stretching his back.

"Yeah, I think we're way overdue for one. Wanna check out what they have at the vending machines?" you suggested. With that, you and Sunghoon left your belongings at the desk and made your way towards the front of the library, where an array of snacks and drinks awaited you.

After contemplating for a moment, you decided to grab a bag of chips and a Gatorade from the vending machines. Sunghoon followed suit, opting for a bottle of Gatorade and a candy bar. Back at your table, the two of you munched away on your chosen snacks.

"You know anything about what the upcoming social is going to be about?" Sunghoon asked, finishing his candy bar. Your sorority and Sunghoon's fraternity were organizing a joint social event this weekend, but unlike previous occasions, they've kept the theme a secret.

"No idea, but I could probably get Karina to spill the beans since she’s on exec, so she probably already knows what’s going on. It's unusual for them to be so secretive," you replied, puzzled by the lack of details. Typically, you would have known about upcoming events months in advance.

"I saw Yeji noona at the house doing something with Heeseung hyung the other day, so I'm guessing they were planning the social. And Jake mentioned that he thinks it's going to be a really big one," Sunghoon shared. The news of your sorority president meeting with EpNu's president caught you off guard. Usually, the planning was left to the social chairs, so their involvement suggested that something significant was in the works.

"I can't even think of a reason why they would need to be involved," you chuckled, a humorous thought crossing your mind. "Imagine if it's a frat wedding."

Sunghoon joins in the laughter. "Can you imagine? I mean it would be a big thing to plan, but there's no way!"

Little did you know...

"What?" you exclaimed, mouth agape in shock, as Yeji revealed to you on Thursday as soon as you return to the house from your morning class.

"Yup! I'm going to announce it in the GroupMe tonight, but I wanted to let you know first. EpNu and our sorority decided it would be fun to host a fake wedding since we haven't had one in a couple of years," Yeji explained, confirming the absurd notion you mentioned to Sunghoon earlier in the week. The idea of a fake wedding between the two houses was actually coming to fruition.

"Oh, and I'm giving you an early heads up because we've chosen you and Sunghoon to be our bride and groom," she casually added, causing you to lose all words. "He and his frat are coming over later tonight so that he can 'propose,' and I want you to dress up and look cute. Everyone will probably be taking photos—it's going to be a blast."

You were still processing the news that you and Sunghoon would be the ones tying the fake knot.

"Why us?" you finally managed to ask, feeling a mix of confusion and embarrassment.

"Well, everyone knows there's something going on between the two of you, ever since, you know..." Yeji began, a mischievous smile forming on her face. "Initially, we thought Jay and Ningning would make a good bride and groom, but they're like too in love and would actually make the whole thing like an actual wedding so we decided that it wouldn’t be as fun as having you and Sunghoon. We're even planning to have Jungwon walk you down the aisle, with Niki and Sunoo as the flower girl and ring bearer! And, of course, you'll have the father-daughter dance with Heeseung since he's Sunghoon's big, and vice versa with Sunghoon and Karina, as she's yours. Jake will officiate it cause Lord knows that boy can run his mouth. All you need to do is find an outfit and write your vows!" It became clear why Yeji was involved in the planning with EpNu—they had thought of every detail.

As the shock and apprehension settled in, you found yourself caught between conflicting emotions. The idea of being the center of attention and having an entire night dedicated to you made you nervous, considering you had never experienced anything like it before. And then there was the fact that you would be fake marrying the boy you had a crush on, adding a whole new layer of complexity to the situation. However, amidst the uncertainty, there was an undeniable sense of excitement bubbling within you.

The thought of spending the entire night with Sunghoon, dancing, and even sharing kisses sent a thrill through your veins. Deep down, you couldn't deny the flutter of anticipation that accompanied the idea. With these conflicting thoughts swirling in your mind, all you could manage was a small nod before quickly retreating to your room.

As the night fell, the anticipation grew, and the house became a flurry of activity. Word had spread quickly, and girls from your sorority kept coming in and out of your and Winter's room, eager to be part of the preparations for tonight's fake proposal. Yujin skillfully curled your hair, while Wonyoung and Winter engaged in a debate over the perfect outfit. Ningning added the final touches to your makeup, and outside, Karina and Giselle scattered rose petals onto the lawn. It seemed like the entire sorority had gathered at the house, each person eager to witness the spectacle. You couldn't help but wonder if a similar scene was unfolding at EpNu.

“They’ll be here in 10 minutes!” Yeji bursted through your room with Lia, another member on exec, excitedly telling everyone.

“Ok, I think we finally got an outfit!” Wonyoung said as she handed you a cute pink dress that had sheer sleeves. You figured it was something of Winter’s since you had never seen this piece ever in your life but you didn’t mind as you put it on carefully trying not to mess Ningning and Yujin’s work.

Winter then gasped at the sight of you, “You look like such a pretty princess! I can’t believe you’re getting married!” Everyone laughed at your best friend’s dramatic statement. You couldn’t help but agree that you did look really pretty but anxiety was coursing through your body.

"They're here! Take her to the balcony!" Karina's voice boomed throughout the house, signaling the boys' arrival. Lia swiftly ushered you to the balcony, and as you stepped outside, a sight greeted you that brought forth laughter.

Roses were scattered everywhere, and the boys of EpNu were standing dressed handsomely. Word had spread like wildfire throughout Greek Row, attracting the attention of other sororities who eagerly gathered to witness the spectacle with their phones out ready to record. Heeseung gestured for the boys to form a semicircle around the balcony, and their melodic voices filled the air as they serenaded you with Taylor Swift's "Love Story." Their harmonies were surprisingly impressive, and Jay's exaggerated riff at the end elicited laughter from the crowd. Then, Sunghoon emerged, wearing a radiant smile and holding a box that presumably contained the fake ring. He approached you, and as he went down on one knee, your heart threatened to burst. He looked absolutely breathtaking as he opened the box, revealing an obnoxious sparkling ring that perfectly fit the occasion.

"My beloved Y/N, I know this may come as a surprise," Sunghoon began, eliciting laughter from the crowd, due to the irony. "But this morning, I realized that I couldn't envision a future without you. So, if you're willing, would you make me the happiest man at HybeU by saying 'yes' and marrying me this Saturday?" Phones were raised, capturing the moment between you and Sunghoon. With a nod, you set off a resounding cheer that rippled through Greek Row. You quickly went downstairs to join the excited crowd. Sunghoon enveloped you in a warm embrace before sliding the ring onto your finger. The cheers continued, and amidst the flurry of photographs, your brother emerged from the crowd, lifting you off the ground in jubilation.

“My sister’s getting married!”

Later that night, the video capturing this enchanting moment found its way to your unsuspecting father, plunging him into a state of panic, resulting in a frantic midnight phone call that left you laughing and reassuring him of the truth.

As Yeji had mentioned on Thursday, you only had two tasks to complete before the wedding: finding a dress with a veil and writing your vows. Luckily, Wonyoung came to the rescue, lending you the dress she had planned to wear for initiation. The white, flowing gown was a perfect fit, and to complete the ensemble, your Amazon delivery with your veil came just in time. However, the task of writing your vows proved to be more challenging. Unlike traditional wedding vows, frat wedding vows usually consisted of much more playful banter, which you found incessantly difficult to come up with.

"Stop stressing, Y/N. It's actually quite funny, trust me!" The room was filled with your friends once again as you all prepared for the social. Ningning skillfully applied your makeup, and you couldn't help but admire how stunning you looked.

"Yeah, and by the time of the actual ceremony, everyone will be drunk, so no one will remember if it’s bad," Winter chimed in, carefully adjusting the veil atop your head.

"Ugh, I just don’t like being the center of attention," you confessed. Presenting in front of a crowd had always made you uneasy, so the thought of so many eyes on you tonight was daunting.

"Just take a few shots before we go in, and you'll feel better," Winter suggested with a knowing smile. You had already planned to do just that as being the only sober person at your own wedding was not an option.

"Alright, are we ready to go?" With everyone seemingly prepared, you took a deep breath, steeling yourself before heading out. If the fake wedding was making you feel this way, you couldn't even fathom the emotions that would accompany your real wedding day.

Jay offered to drive you all to the house where the social would be held. It was no surprise that Ningning had convinced him to do so. Squeezing into the sedan as best as you could, Ningning handed something to you from the front seat. The unopened bottle of tequila felt weighty in your hands as you opened it and took a much-needed swig. You passed it on to Karina, whose lap you were currently on, and she did the same before the bottle made its way around the car.

Arriving at the house, it seemed that you were among the last to arrive. The place was already bustling with your sorority sisters and the EpNu brothers. Taking one final gulp from the bottle, you handed it off to Giselle before stepping out of the car.

"She's here! The bride has arrived!" A pledge (Sunoo maybe?) shouted excitedly, igniting cheers from the crowd. As you and the girls you chose to be your ‘bridesmaids’ were escorted to the kitchen to wait, you were met with the rest of the wedding party which consisted of Yeonjun, Jay, and Beomgyu as they eagerly passed everyone shots before pairing up to walk. Your brother was also present as he greeted you with a big hug and you could tell he was already drunk. The doors then opened signaling everyone to start walking down, then the familiar sound of the Bride's March then blared through the speakers, cueing Jungwon to offer his arm.

As you made your way down the aisle, the air was filled with screams and shouts of excitement. The backyard had undergone a shocking transformation, adorned with white chairs and a beautifully decorated altar surrounded by flowers. Sunghoon stood at the end of the aisle, looking dashing in a perfectly fitted tuxedo, and next to him stood Jake, dressed as a priest. Whoever had assigned him the role of officiating the ceremony deserved an applause as you were laughing at how silly he looked. As you approached the end of the aisle, you were met with Sunghoon’s smile radiating warmth, instantly putting you at ease.

"Alright, alright everyone, settle down!" Jake's voice boomed through the microphone, commanding the attention of the crowd. "Today, we have gathered here to witness the union of our dearly beloved brother and sister," Jake continued, interweaving jokes and witty remarks that ignited waves of laughter among the guests. However, your focus was solely on the man standing before you. Whether it was the lingering effects of the tequila or something more profound, a burning sensation swelled within you. The way Sunghoon looked at you, his eyes filled with a depth of emotion you had never experienced before, leaving you breathless. Despite the fact that the two weren’t even dating, you couldn’t help but wonder if this was what it felt like to be in love.

Lost in your thoughts, you were abruptly brought back to the present as Jake passed you the microphone, signaling that it was time for you and Sunghoon to exchange vows. From behind, Winter handed you the piece of paper you were previously meticulously writing on. Taking a deep breath, you grasped the microphone.

"Hi Sunghoon," you began with a bashful smile, setting off laughter among both Sunghoon and the crowd. "To be honest, when we first became friends during our freshman year, you weren't the one who immediately caught my eye. In fact, I think I had a thing for Heeseung, which I'm sure everyone already knew of," you playfully winked at Heeseung, who joined in on the laughter, seated at the front row with the rest of the audience. "I’m sorry to say, but the only remarkable thing you did that gave me a lasting impression last year was when you stuck your finger down Jake’s throat and he threw up all over your arm. Like that’s a sight I’m never going to forget, but that all changed in an instant, sorry Heeseung, when you accidentally made me drop my beloved Pink Whitney bottle at the EpNu back-to-school party a couple of months ago. Now, for those who know me, know just how much I adore Pink Whitney, so I should have been furious with you. However, you won me over in that very moment when you not only swiftly snagged a replacement from a pledge to appease me, thanks Niki, but also had the audacity to put on 'Boss Baby.' Yes, you heard it right."

A collective chuckle ripples through the crowd as memories of that night resurfaced. Sunghoon joined in on the laughter, his eyes fixed on you with affectionate amusement. "But, of course, the enchantment of that moment quickly faded the morning after when I discovered that you had let 'Boss Baby' be the soundtrack to our fucking. Let me tell you, Sunghoon, I truly believe you've forever tarnished 'Boss Baby' for me. So, thanks for that," you teased, earning another round of laughter. "And to make matters worse, you almost got me pregnant! I think it's safe to say that you left quite an impression on me, enough to make up for the lack of one that you gave me during our freshman year."

Pausing for a moment, you let the lightheartedness settle before continuing, "Now, while your dad jokes can sometimes be horrible, and your obsession with 'Love Island' occasionally turns me off, I can honestly say that I wouldn't be happier than being fake married to you. So, here's to hoping that our one-day marriage surpasses all expectations!" The room immediately erupts with cheers, hoots, and applause, celebrating the witty and heartfelt vows you've just delivered.

Sunghoon was genuinely impressed, even honored, by your heartfelt and humorous vows. Now, the pressure was on him as he took the mic from your hands and retrieved his own set of vows. "Well, well, well, Y/N," he began, adopting a playful tone that draws laughter from the crowd as he mimics the tone of your introduction. "During our freshman year on bid day, I was cruising down Greek Row with the boys when my eyes landed on a girl at the AES house, passionately air-guitaring with a broom in hand alone. I thought to myself, 'Wow that’s interesting,' before continuing on with my day. Little did I know that fate had a different plan in store for me, because the following week, I was introduced to you at a party. And let me tell you, it was a surprise that surpassed all expectations because my initial impression of you was spot on. You're a bit of a weird girl, but hey, that's not necessarily a bad thing."

Sunghoon let out a little laugh before he continued, "Honestly, you kind of scared me just a tad from then on, and it didn't help that I witnessed you taking down Jay," he glanced behind him, catching Jay pointing a finger at you as he shook his head at the resurfacing memory. "So, when I accidentally knocked you over at that party, let me tell you, I was scared shitless so that's why I was so quick to steal from Niki. Thank you, by the way," he added with a grin."I was also shitting my pants when you informed me that you weren't on birth control, and let's not forget the time your lovely asshat of a brother forced me into meeting your parents. I'm still grateful that your dad remains oblivious to the Plan B incident, but I must admit, I'm glad my first gift to you turned out to be a rather expensive one.

Pausing for a moment to let the laughter subside, Sunghoon continued with a touch of sincerity, "I have to give a shout-out to Jungwon for bringing us closer together though. And while you still maintain your status as the wonderfully weird girl I first saw on bid day, especially with your unconventional milk-before-cereal habit, I'm relieved to admit that I'm no longer as scared of you as I once was. That fear has now been transferred to your father, but maybe I'll work on overcoming that too."

Sunghoon's playful and heartfelt vows reached their crescendo, leaving you unable to wipe the radiant smile off your face. "I genuinely hope that our marriage exceeds all your expectations, fulfilling every hope and dream you've ever had. Oh, and I made sure to come prepared this time," he concluded with a mischievous glint in his eyes as he reached into his pocket before whipping out a condom, drawing cheers from the crowd.

As the playful energy infused every word of your vows, a deeper, sincere emotion lingered beneath the surface. Both you and Sunghoon couldn't help but feel the genuine affection woven into the words you exchanged.

"I can't hold back the tears, you guys. That was incredibly touching," Jake exclaimed, taking charge of the ceremony again. "Well, it seems there's only one final thing to do before you two lovebirds become officially married," he said mischievously, reaching down and producing a bottle that was way too familiar to you.

"Take a shot, seal it with a kiss, and then make your grand escape, my dear sweetlings," Jake declared, passing the Pink Whitney to you. Without a moment's hesitation, you brought it to your lips, savoring a sip of its contents, before passing it to Sunghoon, who followed suit with a generous gulp. The room fills with cheers as the anticipation around the kiss builds.

Locked in each other's gazes, you and Sunghoon shared an unspoken understanding. His hand tenderly reaches to cup your face, and with a gentle touch, your lips meet. The kiss was pure magic, his softness melding seamlessly with yours in a dance of perfect harmony. The air becomes electric, charged with the palpable energy of love and celebration. The sounds of friends whistling in delight further amplified the moment as Sunghoon concluded the kiss by dipping you ever so gracefully. With a burst of shared exhilaration, you take each other's hands and make a swift, joyous dash down the aisle.

As the clock struck midnight, the EpNu house transformed into a haven of intoxication and euphoria, with every single person succumbing to the infectious celebratory vibes permeating the air. Sunghoon's arms remained firmly wrapped around your waist, anchoring you to his side with an unwavering grip, unwilling to let you wander off into the chaotic crowd. Your bodies melded together intimately as you swayed to the rhythm of the music, caught up in the enchantment of the moment. Glancing around, you witnessed your friends engaging in similar fervor, each lost in their own uninhibited dance of revelry.

A soft whisper then caressed your ears. "Wanna get out of here?" Sunghoon's words instantly intrigued you as you understood the implications behind his words. You nodded subtly before playfully tugging him towards the front door.

Confusion flickered across his face as he questioned your actions, "Shouldn't we just go upstairs to my room?"

You clearly had something else in mind though. "The house is empty," you revealed. "How do you feel about fucking in my room?" The knowledge that boys were forbidden upstairs in your sorority house made this offer even more enticing. After all, this was your wedding night. Who would catch the two of you when everyone was here?

Sunghoon considered the implications, obviously intrigued. "But what about Winter?" he asked, his desire quickly taken as he remembered that you didn’t live alone.

In response, you retrieved your phone, unveiling a message you had received earlier from Winter. "Look," you told him, displaying the words before him. "Leaving for the SKZ house tonight! Room's free—have the best wedding night, Mrs. Park!" A radiant smile spread across his face, and laughter bubbled forth as you both ran out of the house.

As expected, your sorority house was dead silent indicating that there was no one home. You still made sure to be quiet though as you could never be too careful and quickly dragged an eager Sunghoon up the stairs.

He took a moment to admire the elegance of your room, finding it far more luxurious than his own. But his focus quickly returned to the purpose of his visit. This time, you took charge, pulling him in and initiating a passionate kiss. His lips pressed against yours with a hunger that contrasted the gentle tenderness of your previous encounter at the altar. As your lips part, you invite his tongue inside, while your hands move down his body to skillfully undress him.

His jacket slips off effortlessly, and you eagerly worked on unbuttoning his shirt, planting kisses along his neck. The intoxicating scent of his skin drove you to emit a soft moan.

"God, you sound so pretty," he whispered, causing a blush to creep up on your cheeks. Emboldened by his words, you decided to push the boundaries further. Stepping back slightly, you reached for the zipper of your dress, conveniently located at the side. Without hesitation, you unzipped it and let the dress gracefully slide down, revealing your bare breasts standing proudly. The sight instantly got him hard. This was beyond even his wildest fantasies, and he was silently kicking himself for not remembering the night you two first had sex.

As you stepped out of your dress, you were left in just a white, lacy thong. You didn’t hesitate to drop to your knees and Sunghoon wondered what he had done in the past life to be able to deserve this as you looked like an angel on your knees.

Your fingers worked nimbly to undo the button on his pants and you slightly teased him as you dragged the zipper down slowly instigating a groan out of him. You could tell he was already hard as his bulge was visible through his boxers and you spared him a look before reaching to fully undress him.

As his cock released, your jaw dropped. No wonder you were so sore after the first time as he was obviously the biggest you’ve ever been with. The tip was furiously red and you could see his pre-cum glistening. He was absolutely beautiful and your mouth watered.

Quickly you spit on your hands before wrapping them around his length and groans instantly filled the room.

“You’re so big babe, the biggest I’ve ever been with,” you marveled further at him while slowly starting to move your hands.

“You feel so good, can you use your mouth,” you eagerly obliged at his request leaning forward to wrap your mouth around him. You start sucking at just the tip while still moving your hands slowly around the rest of his length. As you started to slowly descend your mouth you could feel his fingers softly weaving into your hair.

“Just like that. Fuck, you’re so warm,” his groans were heavenly and you could feel yourself getting wet just at the noises he was making.

You decided to take him further as you tried your best to g as far down as you could before you felt him hit the back of your throat. Determined to fit him all, you pushed yourself to go further and you could feel the tears pricking at your eyes as you gagged. This didn’t deter you though as you start to bob around his length at a slow pace, getting yourself adjusted before attempting to go faster. At this, his hand became tighter around the back of your head guiding you up and down his cock. Spit slowly drips down your mouth and to your neck as you furiously worked on making Sunghoon feel good. By now, he was basically fucking your face as you heard his pants get louder.

“I’m almost there, just a little more.” At this, you felt even more motivated to see him reach his climax and you continued to maintain your pace. Then all of a sudden you felt him twitch inside your mouth. Quickly you released him from your mouth as your hands took over.

“I want you to cum on my face,” and at your request, he does just that as you felt the ropes of his cum painting your tear-streaked face. It was a sight that made Sunghoon wonder if he was in heaven. You were absolutely breathtaking as his cum slowly dripped down your face and you caught some of it with your fingers before putting it in your mouth. God, at that sight, he almost came again.

“You’re such a little minx aren’t you,” he quickly pulled you up and threw you onto the bed inciting a giggle from you. Now it was his turn to return the favor.

Your panties were quickly ripped off and he didn’t hesitate to go straight for your core. You were absolutely drenched and he couldn’t help but feel proud that you were in this state because of him. He quickly inserted a finger and had you instantly moaning.

“You’re so wet pretty girl, all this for me?” You nodded while biting your lips. His finger was thick and long and felt so amazing as he slowly started to move them in and out.

“You get wet like this all the time or is it just for me?” He grinned at your reaction to him fingering you and decides to slowly insert another one.

“Fuck, Sunghoon just you. Just you,” You answered him eagerly pawing at his wrists to feel him deeper.

Then without warning, he lowered his tongue to your clit and you almost screamed from the pleasure. He was already hard again just from seeing you writhe under him. He continued to use both his tongue and fingers and your hands desperately latched onto his hair, pulling him closer to your core. The tightness coiling within your lower stomach intensified before you felt yourself overcome with blinding pleasure. He continued his assaults on your pussy as you rode out your orgasm. No one has ever eaten you out like Sunghoon had just done and you were lost for words panting as he looked up at you, mouth sheen, covered in your release.

He then climbed up over you and leaned down for a kiss and you could feel his dick hot against your thighs. As you dove deeper into the kiss you could feel him adjusting himself to enter you. His tip rested at your entrance making you beg to feel more of him. Your core was throbbing for him.

“Please Sunghoon,” and that was all he needed to hear before he fully sheathed himself inside of you. There was an obvious discomfort from the unfamiliar stretch, but it quickly it faded as it turned into pleasure.

“Shit babe, you’re so fucking tight. You’re like sucking me in.” Sunghoon felt almost unworthy of your pussy as it molded perfectly around his length as if you were made for him. He slowly started to move and your hands moved to grasp onto his back pulling him closer. The pace the started to pick up as he moved in and out of you with more force and moans and pants were all that filled your room. Then all of a sudden you felt him grab you by your waist and turn you around. Without warning, he entered you from behind and the position allowed you to feel him deeper hitting the spot.

“It feels so good Hoon, fuck you’re so deep in me,” you moan out as he pushes your head deep into the mattress. Your hands clawed around you, desperate to hold onto anything. His hands then find your shoulders as he uses them to get leverage to thrust into you harder and within seconds you could feel the warmness reappearing in your lower belly.

“I’m almost there please don’t stop, keep going!” You screamed out holding your sheets tightly as you could also hear him grunting over you. And then it came as all you could see was a blinding white light and your eyes roll to the back of your head. It was so good that you couldn’t even seem to form any sounds and you felt him continuing to thrust in you until you felt warm spurts of his cum painting your insides.

“Fuck, Y/N,” he says while he collapses on top of you, not pulling out. Sounds of heavy breathing are all that you could hear for a while as the two of you attempted to catch your breaths.

As he finally moves off of you and pulls out, you could feel his cum slowly dripping out of you. He reached for the box of tissues beside your bed and gently cleans you up before tugging you in his arms.

"I honestly think that was the best sex I’ve ever had," you confessed, a mixture of satisfaction and amusement in your voice. He bursted into laughter, clearly pleased with your response.

"Well, I'm glad I could meet your expectations, Mrs. Park," he replied, his remark reminding you of the fake marriage you both had just gone through. You couldn't help but giggle at the absurdity of the situation.

"So, are you available tomorrow?" you asked, curiosity tinged in your voice. He erupted into laughter, playing up the moment dramatically.

"Wait, is Y/N asking me out on a date right now?" he exclaimed, pretending to be taken aback. Rolling your eyes, you knew he was teasing, but he quickly shifted to a more genuine tone. "Yes, I am free. Down to grab breakfast and finish Love Island together?" And you eagerly nodded.

The two of you continued conversing throughout the night while deciding to go for another round before you finally decide to sleep.

Like a déjà vu, you wake up in a familiar state as you did a couple of months ago, bathed in sunlight as you heard the soft snores emanating from the boy beside you. Smiling, you admired him for a moment, reaching out to touch his hair, before abruptly stopping as a realization hit you.

Fuck, you once again forgot to use a condom.

Bonus:

You found yourself seated quietly in one of the meeting rooms of your sorority house, a sense of unease washing over you. Your gaze was fixated on the two individuals standing before you. Lia, the standards chair, had called you earlier, and whenever that happened, it usually meant trouble. To make matters worse, Yeji was also present, indicating that your offense must have been quite severe to warrant both of their attention.

"I'll get straight to the point. Unfortunately, I have to inform you that you will be fined," Lia spoke briskly, leaving no room for anticipation. Your mind raced, trying to recall all the things you might have done in the past week that could have led to this reprimand.

"Um, okay, but I'm not exactly sure what I'm being fined for," you revealed hesitantly.

Yeji cleared her throat and offered you a small, sympathetic smile before speaking, "Well, the house mom was reviewing the security footage and noticed you bringing Sunghoon into the house. And, well, we also saw you sneaking him out in the morning, so we know he was in your room."

Oh fuck, you had completely forgotten about cameras being all over the house. You really thought you had successfully managed to have Sunghoon over without anyone knowing. The realization that you were caught red-handed, captured in literally in 4k, flooded you with embarrassment.

"I'm so sorry. I completely forgot about the cameras," you sheepishly confessed, unable to meet their eyes.

"I understand that it was your 'wedding night' and you two are in love," Lia said, empathetically. "But please remember not to do this again. I don't want you getting into trouble repeatedly." She then proceeded to inform you of the amount of the fine.

As you walked out, still filled with embarrassment over being caught sneaking your boyfriend (yes, boyfriend!) out of the house, your friends wasted no time in questioning you about the situation the moment you reached your room.

"What did you do to get in trouble?" they eagerly asked.

"I forgot about the cameras and snuck Sunghoon in," you confessed, causing everyone to burst into laughter

"Don't worry about it. I got in trouble last year for trying to let Yeonjun in, but I found a way to avoid getting caught," Karina shared, piquing your interest.

“Wait how?” Giselle asks deeply interested too.

"The backdoor cameras haven't been functioning since the summer. Take that information as you will," Karina revealed mischievously, and with that, you didn’t hesitate to send your boyfriend a text with a smile on your face.

“Wanna come over tonight?”

taglist: @cha0thicpisces @abdiitcryy @moonlighthoon @franknsteinn @sjakewrld

#sunghoon #sunghoon smut #sunghoon fluff #sunghoon scenarios #sunghoon x reader #enhypen #enhypen scenarios #enhypen x reader #enhypen smut #enhypen fluff #fic: pink whitney

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seeingivy · 4 days

Text

middle name

ryomen sukuna x f!reader

**part of my best friends older brother fic

previous part linked here

all you can do is stare.

there’s the smallest hint of gray hairs mixed in with his natural color. his hair is longer, but it’s still the same color. he has the faintest smile lines near his eyes and that small wisp of a beard that he used to always sport is long gone.

he looks younger. what you assume is his youngest daughter is wearing a sparkly green bracelet. green was always sammy’s favorite color. they both seem to have his nose – though that’s really the only resemblance they bear, since they almost entirely take after the lady at their side.

she had to be younger than him, a willowing black dress clinging lovingly to her figure. she had the same smile lines and that short haircut that you find young moms always sported, with three stacked silver chains and a glittering diamond on her finger.

you wonder if she smells like vanilla like your mom does.

“don’t react.”

you turn to your left to find sammy at your side, sukuna and yuuji hovering in the background with matching hazel eyes filled with concern. you shake your head – throwing away the image of their picture perfect smiles – as you focus on sammy, mostly on the fact that her upper lip is trembling.

sammy was always the favorite.

“what did you say?” you ask.

“don’t react.” sammy repeats.

you pause, mulling over the thought.

“okay.” you respond.

“yeah? because we can’t give that asshole the satisfaction. he has no right barging in here the way he just did.” sammy seethes.

you give her a nod, before she takes her side next to you on the wall, the four of you leaning against the wallpaper. sukuna slithers his hand into yours, offering you a smile that you don’t return, before focusing back on the four of them in the living room.

it annoyed you – that you didn’t have enough time to really consider what the best course of action would be. not reacting, you suppose you could understand the appeal. of showing him that you were above him, that he didn’t even warrant a response.

but deep down, you wondered if that would bother you the day after next. if you would be standing in the shower, rinsing the soap out of your hair, and somehow come up with the right thing to say, that would perfectly encapsulate whatever it was that you were feeling.

though you suppose that’s easier said than done. you can barely put words to whatever it is that’s forming in your chest.

you watch as he talks to sukuna’s old basketball coach. so loudly animated as he chats – about how the property values are better two towns over and how the school district is better for the girls. you wonder if the coach thinks it’s offensive. you wonder if he ever considered that you and sammy needed to switch to a better school too.

and it happens in a split second – your dad catching the sight of the four of you – before lifting off the couch and closing the distance between you. yuuji shoots you a weary glance as he gives the four of you a bright smile, before clearing his throat.

you catch a slight whiff of the lemon smell as he walks up, though the lingering scent of smoke you remember gone all together.

“sukuna. is that you?”

you look over at sukuna, watching as he swallows hard, before clenching his jaw.

“yes.”

you watch as he frowns, before pressing one of his hands to his chest.

“i’m so sorry for your loss, kid.” he states.

“sure. thanks.” sukuna responds, rather stiffly.

you can tell that your dad finds the situation uncomfortable – being treated so blandly by the kid he watched grow up, a kid that he knows could surely be more expressive than that – as his eyes flicker over to you and then back to sukuna.

“your dad told me you studied abroad in europe. is this a pretty girlfriend you brought back?”

you bite down so hard on your cheek that all you taste is metallic blood pouring out of the side of your mouth. the implication makes all of you seethe.

that he still talked to people in town. that sukuna’s dad had known his whereabouts, probably for years. and worst of all, that he didn’t recognize you.

“what?” sukuna hisses.

your dad turns over to you, eyes bright, as he holds his hand out. you can feel a sensational burning in the back of your eyes.

“he always used to brag about how his son was studying with the greats. i’m mr. l/n. i’ve known sukuna since he was little.” he states, holding his hand out.

you swallow down the lump of bile, before extending your hand out to him, unsettled by the freezing cold feeling.

that was in no way what mr. itadori said. and he didn't know sukuna, only briefly, when he was little, before he ran away. and you know exactly who he is – far too well.

“nice to meet you.” you mumble.

“take care of this one, okay? he’s a tough one, but we all need a little love sometimes.” he jokes, lightly tapping sukuna on the shoulder.

you watch as he gives sukuna a lingering smile, before shuffling over two steps to where sammy is. sukuna places his hands on your shoulders, his eyes boring into yours – like he’s trying to beckon for your attention – as you watch the two of them.

“hi sammy girl.” he whispers.

you watch as sammy’s eyes water. sukuna watches as you clench your jaw.

“hi dad.” she whispers.

so much for not reacting.

you wonder if you would have broken just as fast if he recognized you. though you suppose you’ll never know, because he didn’t.

it’s a long list of things you’ll never know. the questions that bother you at night – the ones that expose that deep rooted rot that festered in your brain – seem to come to the surface for the first time, in broad daylight.

when did he fall out of love with your mom? when was sukuna going to fall out of love with you? why does he have such a distaste for you? if you were more polite like sammy, would he have stayed? if you screamed a little louder, would the begging have worked?

“i wanted to tell you something.”

you watch as he slings his hand around sammy’s shoulder, squeezing hard, before pointing to the two little girls that are seated on the couch, the two of which were making a mess of mrs. itadori’s coaster set. you wonder what she’d think fo all of this, if she wasn’t so preoccupied.

“those are my girls. claire and molly.”

you watch as sammy scrunches up her nose, her fists clenched into little balls at her side.

“molly was born a year ago. she’s a little shy, but she loves music. but claire, claire’s the exact opposite. headstrong, strong-willed. exactly how a big sister should be.”

“so?” sammy asks, her voice dripping with attitude.

he shakes his head.

“what i mean is that my girl claire reminds me of you. my first girl. so much so, that…well. claire and molly are real special to me. but you, my sammy girl, are always going to be the person who made me a father. that’s why i made claire’s name claire samantha.”

you watch the tears spill from sammy’s eyes, the most bitter contempt in her eyes, as she turns to him, wiping away the stray.

the questions return. what festers in someone to breed such cruelty? what horrors could you and sammy had exacted in your past life to deserve it? how much pressure does it take before something cracks?

would sammy ever get over the fact that she had basically, for all intents and purposes, been replaced? which one is worse – not warranting recognition or just enough to be traded out for the shinier new model?

“thanks dad. that’s real kind of you.” she mutters, crossing her hands over her chest before leaning back against the wall.

you watch as his face falls, albeit halfheartedly – the clear inclination that he didn’t really mind that the statement didn’t land as he intended – before he turns back to the three of you and gives you an awkward smile.

“family stuff.” he mutters.

he disgusts you.

“well, i’ll take my leave. molly’s about to start fussing. i’m very sorry for your loss again, boys.”

you watch as he walks off, retreating back to the couch and picking up claire – claire samantha – before you feel sukuna’s lips on your temple, his hands rubbing circles into your side. yuuji’s at sammy’s side, offering her his pocket square which she takes.

“oh shit.” sammy mutters.

“what?” you ask.

“he’s going to the patio, where mom is.”

you clear your throat, turning on your heel to move, before sammy reaches for your elbow.

“it’s better if you stay here. you don’t want to make things worse when he realizes it’s actually you.” sammy responds, before walking off towards the direction of the room.

sukuna watches as you step back, cursing the fact that sammy, for the most part, always seemed to have a horrible way with words, as he reaches for your hand.

he knows what she meant. that whatever reaction your mom was going to warrant would get infinitely worse when she realized that your own father wasn’t able to recognize you at first glance.

but she didn’t need to say it like that, sinking words placing the blame on you.

“she didn’t mean it like that.” yuuji states.

sukuna watches as you look over at yuuji, face blank, as you nod. he can see that you’re picking at the scab from the shot glass a few days prior on your hand, but you sidestep too fast before he stick his hand in between yours and make you stop.

“i know.” you respond.

it stings.

“i’m just going to take a minute. i’ll be back.” you respond.

you drag your feet as fast as they can take you to sukuna’s room, before shutting the door behind you, quick and fast breaths heaving out of your chest as your vision blurs. sukuna’s voice is quiet, muffled by the wood.

“hey. i’m on the other side when you’re ready for me, okay pretty girl?”

you sit in sukuna’s room for two hours, watching the sun sink down into the horizon from his window, watching as people trail in and out of the front door from below. it’s a pretty sunset – a vibrant mix of purple, blue, and pink – with the clouds swirling beneath.

if sukuna’s dad was a different type of guy, you’d almost think it was a sign from him. that sweet solace that people felt – seeing their loved ones in the beauty of nature.

though, you’d figure he’d be more of a hurricane or a tornado, wrecking havoc to everything he touched, as opposed to a pretty sunet that shed light.

sitting at the windowsill is the first time you realize that from sukuna’s vantage point, he’s always had a perfect view of your bedroom window. it’s not exactly level, so you assume that he was probably never able to see much, except for if your light was on or off and if your curtains were pulled.

you wonder how often he stared at it.

you find one of his sukuna’s old hoodies and pull it over your dress, before climbing into his sheets and pressing your face into his pillow. it smells faintly of his shampoo, the smell so sweetly comforting, as you feel your eyes swell up, the choking feeling in your throat unbearable.

the sounds that leave you are embarrassing, but luckily, you’re the only one who can hear them.

[sammy]: mai came to get me. let’s talk tomorrow okay?

the typing bubble appears, before disappearing. and after a few minutes, a second text followers.

[sammy]: i love you.

you wonder if that complicated, infected part of your brain that seemed to always cultivate some type of disgust for sammy, even when nothing really happened, was a part that you got from your dad.

you’re almost positive that it is. and it bothers you that it somehow feels like it’s something so fundamental, almost biological, that she’ll always rub salt into a wound that you can’t even heal.

you turn your phone off instead.

“are you okay? your mom mentioned that you went upstairs pretty abruptly, said you needed a minute.”

sukuna looks up to find your mom standing there, two ice cold bottles of water in her hands, before she plops down on the carpet next to him, hiking her knees to her chest. the usual picture of perfect hair is astray, the front stands pulled out, and sukuna absentmindedly wonders if you get your hair pulling habit from her.

he doesn’t respond. only because what he said was a lie.

not entirely at least. it was true that he needed a minute, it was just an obstruction of truth that he really needed to take that minute for you.

sukuna notes that she doesn’t mind the silence that much – not only because it’s something that she was well versed in, the mere fact that sukuna didn’t really like to talk when it came to things like this – and instead changes the subject.

“has she come out yet?” she asks.

“no. did yuuji tell you what happened?” sukuna responds.

she smiles, leaning her head back against the rungs of the stairs.

“you missed quite a show downstairs.”

“what?”

she laughs, before reaching up to mess with the ends of the strand closest to her ear.

“he walked out onto the patio with his wife, cindy he said her name was, because he wanted to offer his condolences. your mom responded by slapping him across the face.”

sukuna wishes he was there to see it. or do it himself.

“he was about to start yelling but that’s when sammy came out. i got the gist of what happened before, because sammy basically dragged him out on his ear, giving him a choice set of words about how he can’t gives his new daughter the same names as his old ones, and that he wasn’t her father, no matter how much he deluded himself into thinking that he was.”

sukuna watches as she pauses, taking a shaky breath.

“he told sammy that he wouldn’t really want to be their father anyways, which is why he left, and yuuji punched him in the face.”

sukuna pinches the bridge of his nose.

“i really did miss a show, didn’t i?” he mutters.

“nothing we aren’t used to. i’d think hell froze over if there wasn’t some type of drama at this thing. though, i’d expect violent dramatics from you, not yuuji.”

sukuna shakes his head.

“he came up and talked to all of us before you. he didn’t even recognize y/n, he…he thought she was some girlfriend i brought home from studying abroad. and i’d almost understand it – she was really little when she left – but there’s no excuse. she looks the exact same.” sukuna offers.

sukuna looks over, seeing the same bridge of your nose mirrored in her face, before looking back at the faded paint chipping off the wood of his bedroom door. he wished that he had yuuji’s horrible habits of hoarding snacks in his room, just so that you weren’t sitting in there crying.

“do you have the key?”

“what?”

“the key to the door.” she states.

sukuna bites at his lip.

“i’m not going to open it. or give it to you. she’ll come out when she’s ready for me.” sukuna mutters.

he watches as she laughs, full bellied and warm, before reaching forward and tangling the matted mess of his hair off of his forehead.

“have i ever been one to force you to do anything?”

sukuna sighs, slumping against the wall, before shaking his head.

he had heard the sentiment before, the first time he carried his tired and bleeding knees to the porch, after being kicked out of his house for the first time.

he nearly beat his knuckles bloody from knocking on the door loud enough before she came down, tired and weary eyes that were instantly snapped awake at his crying. and he can’t exactly remember what it was that he said, though he assumes that it wasn’t short of rudeness.

when he begged to stay. and when she let him in without a second glance, he said it quietly.

“you can’t force me to tell you what happened.”

and the response was always the same – the seventh, eight, and ninth time – before he finally got a understood.

have i ever been one to force you to do anything?

“do me a favor, sukuna.” she states.

“okay.”

“let me take care of your mom.”

sukuna looks over at her, taken aback by the sentiment. he was half expecting the half hearted lecture that sammy gave him months prior, about being careful and gentle with her sister, and was expecting a tougher version of that to come from what he knew was a very opinionated and defensive woman.

“what?”

“the worst part is over. i appreciate you picking up slack with me where you could and i’m sorry i couldn’t help more.”

sukuna shakes his head.

“she was basically debilitated. you had to stay with her.” he offers.

“and you sicked my daughter on your brother. but his boyfriend has got him for the rest and i’ll be with your mom for the foreseeable future, like i always have been.”

“i don’t think –”

“you’re leaving here tonight. and you’re taking my daughter with you.” she states.

sukuna shrugs.

“i can’t just leave her. she’s my mom and…and she’s been so fucking fragile for the past few days. you saw how she acted when –”

“and you’re her son. that’s not your job.”

she pauses.

“you step back and take care of my daughter. and maybe more importantly, let my daughter take care of you.” she whispers, raking her fingers through his hair again.

sukuna feels a shiver down his spine, before shaking his head. he can’t just leave.

“no.”

“sukuna.”

he shakes his head again, this time more fervently.

he can’t just leave. he can’t just pawn his own mother off to her and his brother to megumi and walk away.

“you know that godawful, shitty dining table downstairs that your dad picked out? the one that we gave to goodwill when he left for his trip to new york?”

“yeah.”

he remembered the fight that followed after when he realized it was gone. and sometimes, he wondered why his mom would pick a fight over something so trivial as a table.

“it was really heavy. seeing it every day irritated her to no end – that this was her house and her space and that he had taken over it another time. it pissed your mom off so much that every night, after they fought, she’d try to push it out of that damn room on her own. ”

sukuna snorts.

“i remember that.”

she smiles.

“i remember it too. watching her try to push it out of that room on her own, barely making a dent in moving it the merest inch. i think sammy even took a picture of it with that shitty disposable camera i bought her.”

sukuna rubs his palms together.

“okay.”

“i ended up helping her. carried one side and we were able to move it a few more inches. it didn’t really do much, so i got that piece of shit down the street, to help us too. and the old guy who used to live next door, the handyman. your dad was on a three day trip and it took five of us to push that god forsaken table out of the house.”

sukuna feels her pull him closer, wrapping him in a hug. it makes his chest pang, eerily similar to the feeling of being sixteen and sitting on the fact that he was going to leave without saying goodbye.

“my point is that there’s just some things you can’t carry alone, son.”

sukuna feels his throat dry. his eyes water, as he understands – the embarrassing and pitiful question spilling out as a byproduct.

“what if it’s too heavy for her? what…what if i can’t hold her up?” he asks, shaking his head as his voice cracks.

what if sukuna breaks his lifeline? an even worse fate than you dying – being the one responsible for killing you.

she smiles, before gesturing to her left, where sukuna sees yuuji standing.

“you’re more than capable, sukuna. you always have been. and there’s always an extra set of hands to help you lift.”

the thought comes an hour later.

maybe his mom did get to meet the love of her life. and maybe it just wasn’t the person he was expecting it to be.

the second one that follows makes even more sense.

of course the love was always going to be there between you and him. it was destined before you even got here. genetic even.

you make it back home around two in the morning, to three plastic wrapped plates of dinner and megumi asleep on your couch.

it feels a little bit like intruding, but the two of you can’t help but stare as yuuji lightly nudges megumi to wake up, the latter of whom literally bolts up at the sight of him, arms quick on his face before pressing a kiss to his cheek.

you look over at sukuna, gesturing for him to turn around with you, as sukuna unboxes the closest package – the replacement of the broken mug from your birthday – as you hear the two of them retreat, a quiet goodnight whispered to the pair of you.

“which mug do you want?” he asks.

“we can just share.”

there’s a ghost of a smile on his face as he wraps his hands around your wrists, his touch warm as he pulls you forward, tucking you straight into his arms and resting his chin against the top of your head.

and you’re not sure when it starts, but it’s not long before he’s quietly weeping, his frame shaking under you as you bury yourself closer to him, his heart pounding under your ear as you run your hands up and down his arms, quietly whispering into his ears.

he doesn’t stop. he makes no inclination of stopping and it sends a shiver down your spine.

you pull back, cupping his flushed pink cheeks, and wiping away the wetness from his eyelashes before locking your fingers together behind his neck.

“you took my jacket.” he whispers, voice strained.

“it was cold in your room.” you respond.

he nods, before leaning his forehead against yours, quietly trying to steady his breaths in pace with yours, before he abruptly pulls away, and leans against the granite.

“what’s wrong?” you ask.

he gestures his head to the left, where yuuji is standing, before quickly wiping the wetness from his face and pouring the warm milk into the mug. you give him a nod before retreating over to where yuuji is standing, his eyes glued to sukuna.

“yuuji?”

yuuji looks over at you, shaking his head.

“sorry. i wanted to take a shower. do you –”

“i’ll get you a towel, yuu.”

yuuji watches as you retreat, socks sliding on the tile, as he runs his hand through his hair, a deeply sweltering hot regret in his chest.

he had you pegged all wrong. both of you, written off the second he found out about it.

yuuji had the tiniest glimpse of it the other day. the way you so freely ranted to sukuna, watching as he quietly attended to you by braiding your hair to stop you from pulling at it, really – exuding a quiet comfort he didn’t even know he possessed.

but this was worse. because while you were being exactly who he knew you to be – maybe just shocked that you were able to do it with someone else – what he just saw in the short amount of time – sukuna freely crying, or more importantly, openly humbling himself to let someone in to help him crawl out – it was foreign.

unheard of. yuuji was almost positive that sukuna hadn’t even done it before, being so vulnerable with someone.

and he had been giving him a hard time for it

“here’s your towel.”

yuuji grabs your hand as you hand it over to him, squeezing hard as he looks up at you, teary eyed.

“thank you.”

for loving my brother.

“of course. get some rest.” you respond, giving him a smile as you watch him retreat back to the room.

sukuna’s crying has ceased when you make your way back to the kitchen. there’s a steaming cup of hot chocolate with a godawful amount of marshmallows and whipped cream, that he passes over to you for the first sip.

“i’m back.” you respond.

he nods, as he place the cup in your hand hand. and it’s a searing warmth in your cheeks as sukuna lifts his hand, wiping the whipped cream residue from the top of your lip.

“real cute.” he responds, before licking the excess off his own fingers.

you shrug.

“i try.”

he smiles, taking the mug from you.

you’re confused by what happens next – because it looks like he’s going to say something, even going as far as opening his mouth to start talking, before he clamps it shut, with something steaming behind his eyes that you can’t really understand.

and he does it a few times.

“are you okay?”

“yeah. yeah, i just…was trying to figure out how to talk.”

“how to talk?” you ask.

“you know. about all the stuff.”

you hum in response, before looping your arm around his torso, watching the marshmallows slowly dampen under the warm liquid, the smallest amount of steam still leaving the glass.

“it’s probably a lot.” you murmur.

“you have no idea.”

“how about you pick one thing? and we’ll do one thing at a time.”

sukuna nods, heaving a deep sigh, before tangling his free hand into your hair.

“my dad was a piece of shit.”

one of the marshmallows sinks down into the cup, the curved waves of the whipped cream disintegrating with it.

“i mean…my dad was a piece of shit. he died a piece of shit and now he won’t ever be anything else.”

you nod.

“do you…do you know those lifetime shows? where people go on the news and talk about how…how different things changed their lives? like families getting out of horrible financial situations and being happy or people finally getting time to put the work in to better themselves?”

“yeah.”

“i had this really, really crappy thought that i held on to when i was a kid. that some day, that prick would just wake up, and realize what really mattered. that he’d put in the work, that i’d watch my mom get what she deserved, and…and he’d come to my wedding.” he murmurs.

sukuna shakes his head, before clenching his jaw.

“knowing him, the last thing he probably said about you was shitty. and not because he was some vile, sick asshole filled with hatred for you – but hatred for me. for yuuji. for the fact that you were fine with yuuji just as he was. liked me just as i am.”

the steam from the mug is gone.

“that stupid asshole died just as he was. a homophobic, misogynistic prick. he won’t ever change.”

you lean your head against his shoulder.

“still hurts, doesn’t it?” you ask.

sukuna nods.

and thanks his lucky stars that you had that in you, to parse out what he really meant. that his dad died just as he was and now sukuna knows that whatever it was he lost out on is something he won’t ever be able to get back.

grief for what was never going to be.

“more than you know.” he responds.

sukuna pauses.

“what do you think about it?” he asks.

you look down at the mug.

“that it’s his loss.”

“what?”

“by some turn of fate, your dad was very undeservingly blessed with two very loving children. it’s his loss that he’s died without even getting to feel even an inch of that. and i get it, that on paper, his legacy, his career – it’s seemed so worthwhile to people at your house. that even though he died young, he lived a very full life.”

you push the mug over to him.

“to me, it always seemed like he was chasing something. a better title at work, a bigger party he could throw to show off, anything that made him feel like he was larger than life. and i feel sorry for him. he’s had two boys that give the word love meaning under his roof for all these years and it’s embarrassing for him that he never got to feel it.”

you shrug.

“you won’t ever get to have the dad you wanted. but he won’t ever get to reap the benefits, the good love, of what he already had.”

sukuna leans forward, gentle hands on your cheeks, before locking his lips with yours, the kiss mixed in with his quiet tears.

the best kind of kiss he could give you – affectionate. devoted. and bare. you felt like the smallest parts of him were in the palm of your hand, to cherish and preserve.

“your turn.” he whispers.

you snort.

“do you have short term memory loss? i just told you what i thought.”

sukuna shakes his head, wiping the wetness on the back of his hand, before clearing his throat.

“i gave you three hours in that room. it’s your turn.”

you elbow him in the side, before lifting the mug with your hands.

“i gave you a week.”

“you’ve always been more patient than me. i nearly broke the door down.”

you roll your eyes.

“i know you have a key.”

“and i’d never use it.” sukuna affirms.

you smile, seeping in the warmth of the ceramic mug, as you look down at the flowery print, a mottled mess of liquid swimming from everything you had mixed in the cup.

“some part of me thinks that i’m rotten.”

sukuna watches as you set the mug down, reaching for the ends of your hair as you twirl them in your fingers.

“what?”

you sigh, warm tears in your eyes.

“i always thought that there was something wrong with me. there was always a rotten part of me, deep down, and everything i was doing was to keep it from getting out. like…like an infection or something.”

“okay.” sukuna whispers, his tone in his voice beckoning for you to continue.

“he’s vile. he’s vile for showing up to your dad’s funeral. for not even saying a word to yuuji when he was there the day he was born, for trying to sweet talk on your behalf like he knows you or something. having a new family, two new girls, not even sparing a second glance to what came before.”

you pause.

“and he’s my dad. he’s vile and sometimes i feel like he’s…he’s in my head. that some part of him is always going to be intertwined with me and deep down, running through my blood, and that’s why i won’t ever win.”

sukuna reaches forward, cupping your warm cheeks in the palm of his hands. and you look up at him, warm brown hazel eyes so washed in concern for you, and it makes your chest hurt.

“i look at you and all i can think about is that one day, it’ll be the last time you’ll look at me like that. because you’ll leave. you’ll realize that it’s just lipstick on a pig, or…or too much and you’ll take your leave for something better.”

sukuna wishes that he was the one who got to punch him instead of yuuji.

“what do you think?” you ask.

sukuna drops his hold, lifting your hands against his lips and pressing a kiss against your knuckles.

“that i wish i punched him instead.” he states.

“what? someone punched him?”

sukuna smiles.

“my mom slapped him. and yuuji punched him. everyone got to have their cake except for me.”

you snort.

“i wish it was me. because i think he’s sick in the head.”

typical. sukuna was never one to really mince his words.

“i think it’s absolutely disgusting that he left without a trace and that the one person he talked to when he left was my dad – though i suppose that’s fitting.”

sukuna pauses.

“it’s been criminal to watch your mom suffer when she’s one of the first people who gave me a lifeline…and when she brought my second lifeline into this world.”

you smile.

“i think any bit of harshness or judgment i’ve passed on sammy is unfair, because i think i’d be immeasurably cruel at times too if the one person who was required to love me felt that i was special enough to deserve a replacement, but not enough to be the one who was actually loved.”

you sigh..

“and i think it’s batshit insane that he was unable to recognize you when most of the time, you’re the only person in the room with me. it’s entirely unbelievable to me that the one person he gave no recognition to is probably the only person who would ever deserve it.”

sukuna looks down at you and frowns.

“you’re a considerate daughter, a compassionate sister – maybe even when you shouldn’t be – and the warmest friend that my brother has ever had.”

sukuna leans forward, pressing a wet kiss to your forehead.

“you’re a beautiful girlfriend, so painfully kind-hearted towards me that i’m half convinced you’re god with the way you’re able to fix everything with just your hands. you’re everything good and every part of you is worth acknowledging and appreciating. it’s humiliating for your dad that he’s part of the reason you’re here – and that he won’t ever be able to realize that his greatest accomplishment is you.”

you lean forward, tucking yourself into his neck, and it makes sukuna shiver – the cold tears running down his neck as you quietly sob, your voice muffled against the fabric of his jacket.

“you think i’m god?” you sniffle.

sukuna rolls his eyes, unable to contain his smile.

“of course that’s what you take away from it.”

you lean back, looking up at him and the smile on his face. and you commit it to memory – the laugh, the love in the silence, and how it persists in the pain.

“people worship gods.” you clarify.

“and i worship you.”

you curl your nose in disgust.

“ew, sukuna.”

“you’re not saying ew when i’m doing it. it sounds a lot more like –”

you wrap your hand over his mouth, before shushing him.

“your brother is in the next room over.”

“he’s always such a thorn in my side.” sukuna mutters, earning you a laugh from him.

the two of you retreat after the fact. you wash sukuna’s hair in the shower. he insists on doing your skincare for you. and the sun rises on the two of you the next day.

an: LOL. ok I write dream girl now I just wanted to get that out of me.

edit: someone left an ??? upset? or like...idk the word for it comment on ao3 about the fact that it's kind of toxic that sukuna calls her god at the end. pls know that it's JUST a metaphor and he's just trying to compare her to something that's really important and being hyperbolic 💌

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