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most-fuckable-character-showdown · 11 months

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Characters included in the showdown

If any of these characters are repeated or under 18 please let me know asap so I can switch them out

Remus Sanders from Sanders Sides (17)

Janus Sanders from Sanders Sides (14)

Logan Sanders from Sanders Sides (13)

Eda Clawthorne from The Owl House (13)

Roman Sanders from Sanders Sides (11)

Virgil Sanders from Sanders Sides (10)

Din Djarin/Mandalorian from The Mandalorian (10)

Remy Sanders from Thomas Sanders Shorts (10)

Patton Sanders from Sanders Sides (9)

Noise from Roleslaying with Roman (8)

The Once-ler from the Lorax (7)

Sans from Undertale (6)

Angel from Hell’s Belles (5)

Julian Devorak from The Arcana (5)

William Afton from fnaf (4)

Ingo from Pokémon (4)

Leon S Kennedy from Resident Evil (4)

Anxiety Sanders from Thomas Sanders Shorts (4)

Clay Puppington from Moral Orel (4)

Youngblood from Roleslaying with Roman (4)

Bill Cipher from Gravity Falls (3)

Shane from The L Word (3)

Jameson Jackson from Jacksepticeye (3)

The Other Side of the Pillow from Thomas Sanders Shorts (3)

Virgil the Rat from Ride the Cyclone (3)

Kylo Ren from Star Wars (3)

Megamind from Megamind (3)

Bucky Barnes from MCU (3)

Spider-Man (Andrew Garfield) from No Way Home (3)

Mike from Roleslaying with Roman (3)

Ryker from Roleslaying with Roman (3)

Roman from Roleslaying with Roman (3)

Raine Whispers from The Owl House (3)

Vash the Stampede from Trigun Stampede (3)

Nicholas D Wolfwood from Trigun (3)

Cecil Palmer from Welcome to Night Vale (2)

Sage Lesath from Last Legacy (2)

L Lawliet from Death Note (2)

Crowley from Good Omens (2)

Dr. Bright from SCP Foundation (2)

Shrek from Shrek (2)

Peter Cola from CNP (2)

Peppino from Pizza Tower (2)

Tangerine from Bullet Train (2)

Luis Sera from Resident Evil 4 (2)

Darius from The Owl House (2)

Hannibal Lecter from Hannibal (2)

Alastor from Hazbin Hotel (2)

Enjorlas from Les Miserables (2)

Jessie from Pokémon (2)

James from Pokémon (2)

Mettaton EX from Undertale (2)

Sampo Koshi from Honkai Star Rail (2)

Wilford Warfstache from Markiplier (2)

The Narrator from The Stanley Parable (2)

Shego from Kim Possible (2)

Lady Dimitrescu from Resident Evil (2)

Blackbeard from Our Flag Means Death (2)

Orange Side from Sanders Sides (2)

Lucio from The Arcana (2)

Burgundy Red from Roleslaying with Roman (2)

Puff Puff Humbert from Your Favorite Martin (2)

Viktor Humphries from Slime Rancher (2)

Angel Dust from Hazbin Hotel (2)

Miss Secondopinionson from Moral Orel (2)

Eggman from Sonic (2)

Spamton from Deltarune (1)

The Corinthian from The Sandman (1)

Asra Alnazar from The Arcana (1)

Felix Escellun from Last Legacy (1)

Edwin from Gummy and the Doctor (1)

Hatori from Fruits Basket (1)

Izzy Hands from Our Flag Mean Death (1)

Undyne from Undertale (1)

Glamrock Freddy from fnaf: security breach (1)

Gummy from Gummy and the Doctor (1)

Nadia Satrinava from The Arcana (1)

Scorpia from She Ra (1)

Jareth the Goblin King from Labyrinth (1)

Vaporeon from Pokémon (1)

Rouge the Bat from Sonic (1)

Aaravos from The Dragon Prince (1)

Millions Knives from Trigun Stampede (1)

Spock from Star Trek (1)

Toriel from Undertale (1)

Bowser from Super Mario (1)

Shota Aizawa from My Hero Academia (1)

Tom Nook from Animal Crossing (1)

Critic Sanders from Thomas Sanders Shorts (1)

Skeletor from Masters of the Universe (1)

Elias Bouchard from The Magnus Archives (1)

Asmodeus from Obey Me (1)

Guillermo from What We do in the Shadows (1)

Asgore Dreemurr from Deltarune (1)

Dio Brando from Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure (1)

Tenth Doctor from Doctor Who (1)

Death from Puss in Boots: The Last Wish (1)

Red Guy from Don’t Hug Me I’m Scared (1)

Padme from Star Wars (1)

Archibald Asparagus from Veggie Tales (1)

Shen Jiu from The Scum Villain’s Self Saving System (1)

Roxanne Wolf from fnaf: security breach (1)

Gomez Addams from The Addams Family (1)

Rick Sanchez from Rick and Morty (1)

Fiona from Shrek (1)

Jack Skellington from The Nightmare Before Christmas (1)

Emile from Cartoon Therapy (1)

Vlad Masters from Danny Phantom (1)

Eyeless Jack from Creepypasta (1)

Merlin from Fate/Grand Order (1)

Verosika Mayday from Helluva Boss (1)

Ganondorf from The Legend of Zelda (1)

Michael Afton from fnaf (1)

Marvus Xoloto from Hiveswap (1)

Kim Kitsuragi from Disco Elysium (1)

Jang Jaeyoung from Semantic Error (1)

The Bog King from Strange Magic (1)

Batman from Batman (1)

Randy Jade from Dialtown (1)

Yor Forger from Spy x Family (1)

Mark Winters/Wavelength from Just Role With It (1)

Dr. Alto Clef from SCP Foundation (1)

Striker from Helluva Boss (1)

Stoic the Vast from How to Train your Dragon (1)

Bandit from Bluey (1)

Spain from Hetalia (1)

Dorian Gray from The Picture of Dorian Gray (1)

Muriel from The Arcana (1)

#mfc showdown #most fuckable character showdown

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idrawiguess · 7 months

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✨ Welcome!! 🪐

🖌️ Sketch Requests are: Open!!!

🎹 Interests: Traditional & Digital Art| Space | Mental Health | Music & Theater | OCs/writing

🛑 DNI: proshippers, heavy nsfw accounts!

🏆 Fandoms you might see me make fanart and/or post about!

Asks & DM’s are always open, though I might take a little bit to respond!

If you send in a sketch request that I don’t feel comfortable drawing, I reserve the right to decline the request.

Special thanks to @edensundae for this intro format, you should totally go check them out!

I also run @hazbinhotelincorrectquotes!

Have fun exploring my blog! Try not to get lost!

Last updated: April 26, 2024

#idrawiguess #intro post #blog intro #artist #lgbt artist #artists on tumblr #fandoms #looking for mutuals #info post #digital artist #traditional artist

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dumbass-duo-showdown · 1 year

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ROUND 1!

To start, round 1 will take place during 2 days. Both starting at 5pm CET with the first 8 groups on each side, then with the other 8 at 8pm CET. With a break in between group 1 (apple) and group 2 (bapelsin).

We start with most votes, then by fandom. The rest is random

Round 1 - apple, 8/4-2023, day 1

God (bible) vs Reigen Arakata (mob psycho 100), finished

John Silver (treasure planet) vs Donquixote Rosinate (one piece)finished

Garmadon (Lego Ninjago) vs All Might (my hero academia), finished,

Bandit Heeler (bluey) vs Heinz Doofeshmirtz (Phineas and Ferb), finished,

Maes Hughes (full metal alchemist) vs Uncle Iroh (avatar, the last airbender), finished

Bob Blecher (bob’s burgers) vs Professor Utonium (PowerPuff girls), finished

Yosuke Koiwai (Azumanga Daioh) vs Iruka Umino (Naruto), finished

Asura (asura’s wrath) vs Darkwing Duck (ducktales cinematic universe I mean darkwing duck), finished, finished

Hakoda (avatar the last airbender) vs Kaname Date (ai: Somnium files), finished

Sojiro Sakura (persona) vs Ice King (adventure time), finished

Richard Waterson (the amazing world of gumball) vs Dr Venomous (ok ko let’s be heros), finished

Splinter (teenage mountain ninja turtles) vs Kazuki Kurusu & Rei Suwa (buddy daddies), finished

Jotaro Kujo vs Bruno Bucciarati (JoJo’s bizarre adventure), finished

Greil vs Eliwood (fire emblem)

Peony vs Kukui (Pokémon), finished

Seteth (fire emblem) vs Phoenix Wright (ace attorney), finished

Day 2 9/4

Largo the black lion (tales in the abyss) vs David Evans (Inazuma 11), finished

Loid Forger (SpyxFamily) vs Ferid (Suikoden V), finished

Kotestu Kaburagi (tiger and bunny) vs Tim Lockwood (cloudy with a chance of meatballs), finished

Naoki Gotoh (bocchi the rock) vs Oscar Proud (the proud family), finished

Shouta Aizawa (my hero academia) vs Bill Green (big city greens), finished

Dracula (hotel Transylvania) vs Donald Duck (ducktales), finished

Ken Shirashi (project Sekai) vs Sailor Uranus (sailor moon), finished

Skipper (penguins of Madagascar) vs Norisuke Higashikata the 4th (JoJo’s bizarre adventure), finished

red leg Zeff (one piece) vs Sully (monsters inc), finished

Kouhei Inuzuka (sweetness and lighting) vs Geto Suguru (jujutsu Kaisen), finished

Alibert (wakfu) vs Oboro (Suikoden V), finished

Meta Knight (Kirby) vs Senshi (delicious in dungeon), finished

Jades Curtiss (tales of the abyss) vs Gru (despicable me), finished

Pankraz Gotha(dragon quest 5) vs Zenkichi Hasegawa (persona), finished

Keiji Shinoji (your turn to die) vs Kanan jarrus (Star Wars: rebels), finished

Chilchuck (delicious in dungeon) vs Mr Ping (kung fu panda), finished

Bapelsin day 1, 11-4

Eddie Diaz & Evan Buckley vs Bobby Nash (911), finished

Benjamin Sisko (Star Trek deep space 9) vs Dad Egbert (homestuck), finished

Subject Delta (bioshock) vs Damien Bloodmarch (dream daddy), finished

Goldlewis Dickinson (guilty gear) vs Atticus Finch (to kill a mockingbird), finished

Paul Blofis (Percy Jackson) vs Kazuhira Miller (metal gear solid), finished

Gomez Addams (the Addams family) vs Din Djarin (the mandalorian), finished

Hans Hubermann (the book thief) vs Lee Everett (telltales the walking dead), finished

Kiryu Kazuma (yakuza) vs Waymond Wang (everything everywhere all at once), finished

PART 2

Jean Valjean (les misérables) vs Joel Miller (the last of us), finished

Calvin’s dad (Calvin and Hobbes) vs Augustus Aquato (psychonauts), finished

Pyrrha Dve (the locked tomb) vs Dustan Thron (stardust), finished

Neon J (no straight roads) vs Common Wubbox (my singing monsters), finished

Patton Sanders (sander sides) vs Doc Louis (punch out), finished

Alther Mella (septimus heap) vs Riki (xenoblade), finished

Digby Wolf (fables/a wolf among us) vs Bob Cratchit (a Christmas carol) , finished

Petey (dogman) vs Mo Folchart (inkheart), finished

Day 2, 13-4

Alfred (Batman) vs Gandalf (lord of the rings), finished

Asgore Dreemurr (undertale) vs Micheal Bluth (arrested development), finished

Dave Seville (Alvin and the chipmunks) vs Martin Penderwick (the Penderwicks), finished

Anthony Herzen (professor Layton) vs Chimney Han (911), finished

Glamrock Freddy (five nights at Freddy’s) vs Mr Carrisford (a little princess), finished

Poseidon (Percy Jackson) vs bail Organa (Star Wars), finished

Neir Gestalt (Neir) vs Kim Dokja (Omniscient readers viewpoint), finished

Hal Wilkerson (Malcom in the middle) vs Ness’ dad (earthbound), finished

PART 2

Tony Stark (MCU) vs Lee Scoresby (his dark materials), finished

Dream (sandman) vs Kat (all quiet on the western front), finished

Thrushpelt (warrior cats) vs Teacher (the girl from the other side) , finished

Barret Wallace (final fantasy) vs Lazlo Cravensworth (what we do in the shadows), finished

Domingo Montoya (the princess bride) vs Charlie Swan (twilight), finished

Geralt of Rivia (the Witcher) vs Terry Jeffords (Brooklyn 99), finished

Dan Espinoza (Lucifer) vs Rupert Giles (Buffy), finished

Pollination Tech 9 smith (the sims 2) vs Marko (saga), finished

Okay basic questions time before I get a bunch of anon asks

“Two of these are women.”

Father figures also count

“Some of these doesn’t have their own kids”

See point 1

“Why is there only a few characters from the same franchise going against each other but sometimes they aren’t”

Because I only recognized fire emblem, Pokémon, and JJBA at first.

“Aus doesn’t count”

As a previous undertale fan. I could care less. And I am not replacing Tim with BAMSE.

“Replace x with Bamse”

Sorry but. Findus and Skalman have already won. 3 times are a bit too much for us sweds.

“911 is copaganda”

You see Brooklyn 911 (picked by wheel) and you go against fireback mountain. Shame on you anon.

“Dad council these aren’t all random”

Yeah but Neon J vs Wubbox = chaos

Code of conduct

EXTRA BATTLE

#best dad battle #best dad battle updates #treasure planet #bioshock #one piece #jojos bizarre adventure #911 on fox #bluey #dad council has an announcement

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wouldntyou-liketoknow · 7 months

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Day 6: Decapitation

(Disclaimer: none of the characters in this story belong to me. Janus, Remus, and any other mentioned Sides are the property of Thomas Sanders)

(Trigger Warnings: blades, slight physical violence, body horror, blood, acidic chemicals, skin-melting, snakes, slight mentions of food/drink, strong language. Please let me know if I missed anything.)

Day 1 Day 2 Day 3 Day 4 Day 5 Day 7 Day 8 Day 9 Day 10 Day 11 Day 12 Day 13

As fluid as the Mind Palace typically was, two things always remained constant.

1. Tampering with Logan’s jars of Crofters in any way, shape, or form would result in truly devastating consequences.

2. Out of all the Sides, Janus was the best at corralling Remus. (Well, Logan was somewhat a close second, considering the information above. The Jam And/or Jelly Incident of 2019 had been the very first case of Remus actually learning his lesson.)

This was one of many things that Janus got to be smug about. . .as well as one of few things that he could be genuine about. Sure, Remus grated his nerves like no other at least sixty-nine percent of the time, but he’d had more than enough time to make the friendship between them strong and worthwhile and real. Hell, by now Janus would potentially wager that he knew Remus better than Remus knew himself.

Potentially.

It was now Autumn both inside and outside of Thomas’ brain, which meant Spooky SeasonTM was officially upon the Sides.

Now, while all the Sides appreciated Spooky SeasonTM, none of them could appreciate it quite like Remus. Mainly because this particular month gave him an actual excuse to take his horrific shenanigans and, on a scale from one to ten, crank them all the way up to OH MY GOD WHAT IS THAT THING WHY DOES IT HAVE EYES WHERE THE MOUTH SHOULD BE AND MOUTHS WHERE THE EYES SHOULD BE—?!

Janus had been working in his garden (the secondary space off of his bedroom), making sure the pumpkins he’d been growing were good and ripe. There were twelve large gourds in this year’s harvest: enough for each Side to carve two of their own jack-o-lanterns. He’d also raised a few smaller-scale pumpkins that would meet their fates as a pie, a loaf of bread, and a batch of cookies.

He still had his ulterior motives, mind you. He figured this gesture would keep everyone busy for a while so he could focus on some dreadfully cunning schemes. . .plus enjoy some wine and binge his Addams Family collection without disturbance.

(As clever and devious as Janus was, this idea that a holiday tradition somehow wouldn’t end in chaos proved that while he did hold many of the brain cells in this operation, his grip on aforementioned brain cells occasionally wasn’t the firmest.)

Janus had just cut the last of his vegetable-masquerading fruit from its vine with a pair of pruning shears. He’d been in the middle of hefting it up, about to turn and place in his yard cart with the others when he heard the unmistakable sound of footsteps stampeding closer and closer and—

Even before he’d discovered a flash of green and black in his peripheral vision, he’d braced himself. He tried to pull off a graceful sidestep that would’ve made Bugs Bunny proud.

But it was still too late.

He felt foreign weight slam into his side.

He saw a metallic blur glinting, swinging right for his throat.

He heard a whooshing Snicker-Snack! which was accompanied by a sickening cRrrck-pop!

And then he was airborn with what seemed to be a lot more vertigo than usual for simply losing balance. An instinctual squawk barged its way through his lips as his face met the ground, trademark bowler hat flying off due to the impact.

“Heads up, Janny!” A familiar voice squealed, maniacal laughter somehow not drowning out Janus’ sigh.

“Right, because it just doesn’t make any sense to call out a warning before you take action.”

“Exactly!” Remus agreed, his mustachioed figure entering Janus’ field of vision, hefting a bloody axe over one shoulder.

The blood in question was a deep shade of gold, glowing and letting off a bit of steam. It wasn’t real blood, of course, as Janus wasn’t a corporeal person. That was why he didn’t feel any true pain from whatever Remus had just done to him. He and the other Sides could still feel pain, but it was just. . .a very different type from the human pains that Thomas could feel.

“What’s your game today?” Janus asked, using the supremely uninterested tone of voice he always used when trying to play off a slight. “Have you already gotten bored with trying to catch Logan off guard?” He knew it was pointless to ask why Remus had singled him out. Since the first day of October, The Duke had been selecting the other Sides at random to be the victims of his Halloween escapades. He’d already pulled a staggering amount of pranks on the Lights, so perhaps he’d decided to take a break and target his fellow Darks for a bit.

“Oh, no-no-no,” Remus replied with a shake of his head. “Logan’s on my schedule three days from now.”

Janus raised an eyebrow. “Since when do you care for schedules?”

Remus raised an eyebrow right back. “Uh, since I learned about the Goretober tradition online? Duh!”

“. . .Ah, that’s right. That was the first thing you saw once you found a way to Tumblr.” Janus nearly cringed at the memories, but he wouldn’t let his mask of casual nefariousness slip. Especially since it was threatening to slip away as he tried to right himself and. . .failed.

It took everything he had to not let his mouth drop open in shock at the realization that he couldn’t completely feel his arms.

Or his legs.

Or his everything else.

In fact, it seemed the only things he could truly feel were all above the neck.

Janus glanced back at Remus, annoyed to discover that the latter had most certainly seen the brief shock that had just manifested in his eyes.

“Remusssss,” Janus hissed, narrowing his eyes to a dangerous extent. “What the hell have you done?”

Remus tilted his head with a smirk. “Isn’t it obvious?”

“If it was obvious, then I wouldn’t have asked.”

“. . .Meh, fair point.” Remus shrugged, then tossed his axe onto the ground before cupping his chin in thought. “Well, I suppose I could just tell you. . .but we all know I’m all about visual stuff, so. . !”

“What are you—HEY!” Janus bared his teeth, snarling as Remus reached for his face. He immediately tried to twist away, but he just couldn’t feel any movement. “No! NO! REMUS, GET YOUR GRIMEY HANDS OFF ME BEFORE I—!”

Janus cut himself off as Remus hefted him up, all but cradling his lower jaw. He was still greatly concerned about A. all the things Remus could’ve potentially touched before this, and B. what he’d have to wash his face with to make sure both his skin and scales were properly cleaned.

But that concern took a brief backseat to shock as Janus realized. . .his torso wasn’t brushing against the other Remus’. It should’ve been, considering how he was being held, but it just wasn’t. He glanced downward, but all he could see were Remus’ arms.

“Before you what, exactly?” Remus inquired, grinning and batting his eyelashes with snide glee.

Janus felt his brow furrow. He made to experimentally raise one arm.

He felt the movement from his shoulder and near his side.

But the limb in question never came into view.

He then let his arm drop, and felt it lightly collapse against the ground.

Remus must’ve seen his cohort putting all the pieces together, because he chuckled and maneuvered his hands in order for Janus to see. . .well, Janus. It wasn’t unlike all the times Janus had hovered before the vanity mirror in his room to fix himself up for his outings. The only difference was the veil of golden smoke billowing into the air from his freshly-opened neck. More of the glowing, metaphysical blood tried to ooze out, but now that Janus had finally seen the damage for himself, he was able to will said blood back where it belonged before it could stain his cloak.

“Well,” Janus pronounced rather casually for a man who was looking at his own decapitated body. “I’ve seen you do much worse.”

Remus hummed proudly. “The Dragon Witch was too busy hunting to come do a performance-battle with me. I was really disappointed at first, but then I remembered you talking about the pumpkins, so. . .yeah!”

Janus hummed in thought, watching as his body picked itself up and dusted the dirt away from his outfit. It then stooped down to collect Janus’ hat, which it silently twirled about its index finger as it came to stand before Remus. Janus’ free hand then outstretched in an expectant manner. “Do you mind. . ?”

“Oh, sure.” Remus handed Janus’ head back to his body with a flourish.

“Thank you.” Janus nodded(?) once his hat was returned to its proper place. His arm ever-so-slightly raised him up, letting him make eye-contact with the other Side. “Say, Remus. Did you know a snake's head can still bite long after it’s been severed and the main body has died?”

“Indeed I did! Same thing goes for wild boars, too! Why do you aaAUGH!” Remus failed to duck-and-cover fast enough as Janus opened his mouth wide, allowing two streams of venom to spray from his extended fangs. Aforementioned venom spattered against Remus’ face, hissing and bubbling as it immediately began eating into his skin.

Janus closed his mouth, a devilish smirk quickly etching its way across his features as he watched Remus fall to the ground, writhing and screaming. “How the hell were you not expecting that? You were the one who suggested I make my venom acidic.”

“Oh, I expected it alright,” Remus protested, voice keening even more than usual as he choked on air. “Figured it’d make us even, y’know?”

Janus snorted. “How polite of you.” He carefully moved his head backward, then lowered it onto his neck. This stopped the majority of the yellow smoke from pouring, though a few columns still managed to slip out between the new wound. Janus held his noggin in place, patiently waiting for his skin and bones to knit themselves back together like they always did whenever he was injured.

It took a good ten seconds or so for him to realize that the typical healing process was taking much longer than usual.

Janus felt his face fall—then he felt it twist into a scowl yet again as he heard Remus’ cries of pain transition into his usual giggles.

“W-What’s going on?” Janus blurted. “Why isn’t—?!”

“Relax, my dear Danger Noodle. It’s not permanent,” Remus interjected. He shakily got to his feet to face Janus once more. By now, Janus’ venom had stopped bubbling, but the flesh of his face was still very much a melting, oozing, hideous mess. His left eye was now completely out of proportion; its socket was sagging down to nearly touch the corner of his mouth. Meanwhile, his right jawbone had been partially revealed, bloody and glistening in the light. “You’ll get to heal that little cut by the stroke of one forty-five a.m.”

Janus’ mouth sporadically opened and closed with no words coming out; a concoction of shock, rage, and confusion clambered about his face as he stared at Remus.

Remus simply waved the glower off, folding his arms across his chest. “Ah, c’mon. Having to manually carry your head around until the wee hours can’t be that hard. In fact, you should really be thanking me.”

“THANKING YOU?!” Janus seethed as he began pacing in a small, angry circle. He would’ve thrown his hands up in anger, but he didn’t particularly want to taste his garden’s soil again.

“Yes! As I am to you!” Remus sliding up to Janus, reaching out to shake hands with his free arm. “Because now we’ve both got some kick-ass costumes for today! Don’t get me wrong, it’s really damn impressive what some artists can do with special effects makeup, but look at us! We’ve got the real deal, motherfuUUUUAAAH DAMN IT!”

Remus collapsed onto his knees as the second spritz of Janus’ venom disintegrated even more of his flesh.

Janus’ forked tongue flicked between his gritted fangs like a macabre party favor. His free hand reached under the brim of his hat to massage his temple as he mentally began counting to ten.

“A-ah. . .hey, look at that! Y-you made my costume even more authentic,” Remus wheezed, offering a thumbs up as his right eye started to dribble. “Go team!”

___

About an hour passed, and Janus found himself in the Mind Palace’s dining room. He sat at the end of the table, carefully outlining a design on the pumpkin of his choice with a black marker.

(Or, his body was doing all that, to be more precise. His head was merely watching, resting on a small silk pillow he’d brought from his bedroom.)

The other fruits of his harvest were all gathered opposite of his seat, patiently waiting for Janus’ peers to hollow them out and give them faces.

Speaking of which. . .

“We’re baaaaack!” Roman’s voice called out, musical as ever and accentuated by several footsteps entering the kitchen from the back door.

“I hope we’re not late,” Patton’s bubbly tone followed, sounding a bit more strained than usual. The sound of way too many shopping bags being plunked onto countertops throughout the kitchen explained that pretty well.

“Drat,” Janus greeted in a somewhat raised voice, not taking his eyes off of his jack-o-lantern-in-progress. “I really thought you’d gone to get some more milk this time.”

“I did!” Patton reassured. He was still in the kitchen, so there was no way to be certain if he truly understood that little jab. “We’ll be whipping up a fresh batch of cookies soon, after all! I may be a laid-back dad. . .” Patton’s giggles suddenly halted, and his voice became low, “. . .but I will NOT tolerate any treat-blasphemy in this household.”

“I’m trembling in my boots,” Janus yawned, trying to ignore the tiny chill that crept along his spine. “The sugar-pumpkins you requested are ready.”

“Hmm? Oh yeah, I see them!” Patton cheered. “They’re just adorable!”

“Puh-leeze, Padre. The only adorable fruit in here is you!” Roman, also having yet to be seen, chuckled. “Because I’m the handsome fruit, obviously.”

More footsteps began trekking along the floor, quickly getting closer and closer to the dining room. Janus had to bite his tongue to avoid chuckling once he saw the sleeve of Patton’s cat-hoodie poke around the kitchen doorway

“Thank you so much for growing these guys, Janus! You’ve helped me to really give everyone pumpkin to talk aboouu. . .” Patton trailed off, the way his eyes were growing to the size of dinner plates suddenly evident in his voice.

For dramatic effect, Janus waited until he heard the telltale sound of a body staggering against the adjacent wall and hitting the floor with a light thud before finally acknowledging the other Side. He smiled, offering a polite nod(?).

Patton, in response, somehow managed to nod back even as he sat trembling and gaping. “J-J-Janus. . ?”

“P-P-Patton?” Janus echoed, tilting his head to the side and putting on a mask of innocent confusion.

"Are—are you. . ." Patton fumbled over his words. ". . .okay?"

"Maybe, maybe not. That just depends on perspective." Janus quirked a cryptic eyebrow. He knew Patton understood how beings like themselves couldn't truly be harmed or killed by physical means like this (despite all that fluff between his ears), but the latter Side still definitely wasn't used to seeing his peers going about their typical business post-decapitation. "Come now, don't look so shocked. I have mentioned wanting to stay ahead of you all several times in the past."

An uncertain giggle wormed its way out of Patton's mouth as the wordplay graced his ears. He still looked a bit green around the gills, but it seemed his nerves were calming back down.

After all, a beheaded person who could still talk and move and make puns (probably) made for much better company than a beheaded person who would just conform to Rigor Mortis and bleed out all over the carpet.

“Hey, Patton? Where did you want the—” Roman called, his shadow crossing the floor as he, too, began to approach. “Whatever are you doing on the floor? It looks you’ve seen a ghAUGH!"

“Hello to you, too, Roman.” Janus’ hand briefly put the marker down in order to tip his hat to the aforementioned prince.

“WHAT IN THE NAME OF TRIXIE MATTEL HAPPENED TO YOU?!”

Janus raised a hand, letting it hover before his mouth in a mock-gasp. “Really, now? Using her majesty’s title in vain? I would’ve expected better from you!” He then rolled his eyes as his body went back to work on his pumpkin. “It’s just a scratch, really.”

“A scratch?!” Roman cried, venturing a few steps closer. “Your head is off!”

Janus smirked, eyes glinting mischievously. “No it isn’t.”

Roman sputtered, pointing at Janus’ neck. “Well, what’s that, then?!”

Janus tossed a glance at his body. The golden smoke was still rising from the hole where his head should’ve been. He could’ve made it stop entirely, but he’d decided against that, since it was a truly interesting sight once you got past the fact that blood should’ve been gushing out.

“. . .I’ve had worse.”

“Is the unnecessary confrontation already beginning?” The voice that echoed from somewhere by the living room sounded calm and steady at first, if not clipped. If you listened closely, however, you’d be able to tell that the speaker was simply holding back on some extremely warranted aggravation with the power of Crofters jam and well-intentioned vibes. “I was certain the inevitable catastrophe would come after the pumpkins' insides were cleaned.”

Logan came strolling down the staircase, and though he did do a near-neck-snapping double-take upon seeing Janus in a much more beheaded state than usual, he took his shock with much more stride than the others. “Salutations, Janus. Are you. . .well?”

“Now that you mention it, my neck is feeling a little numb,” Janus replied, making sure that he still looked and sounded supremely unbothered by his headlessness.

Logan ever-so-slightly raised his eyebrows, some undeniable curiosity glinting in his eyes. “I’m assuming Remus had something to do with this?”

Janus pursed his lips. “What gave you that impression? The way he was sing-shouting something along the lines of how I should’ve let him carry my head as he ‘properly galumphed’ back into the commons?”

“Correct."

“Ah, so you haven’t gone deaf yet. I suppose that’s good to know.”

Logan quietly moved closer to the table, standing on the opposite side of Roman, who was still murmur-rambling in shock for all he was worth. “May I ask what prompted him to—”

“Really, what’s the point if you haven’t guessed by now?” Janus tsk-tsk-tsk-tsk-tsked, raising one hand to wag a finger in Logan’s direction. “In any case, it’s not important.”

“I’m inclined to disagree!” Roman protested.

“Why haven’t you reversed the damage by now?” Logan wondered aloud. “Having to carry your own head can’t be a very pleasant experience.”

“Oh, you’d be so surprised,” Janus drawled, his body offering a shrug. “I’m sure I’ve proven how much I adore the odd challenge or two. Would you believe me if I said that I sought out Remus and requested this?”

Logan’s face was quick to fall back into its usual no-nonsense mask. “No, I wouldn’t.”

“Right, right. Just as I wouldn’t be more focused on keeping an eye out for the plans Remus might have for later this week.”

Logan squinted at this particular statement, just barely tipping his head in a nod as his eyes darted all around the room in thought. He then set his focus on the available pumpkins nearby, scanning the pile to see which one would be worthy of his carving.

“W-well. . .I mean, it sounds like there’s gourd vibes all around.” Patton cleared his throat, finally back on his feet. He flashed a nervous-yet-genuine smile over to Janus, who responded with a smug chortle at the pun. “But the pumpkin-flavored everything isn’t gonna make itself, so, I guess I’d better get to it!” He turned on his heel, retreating back into the kitchen. “You kiddos have fun with the jack-o-lanterns! Just call me if you need anything!”

Roman finally picked his jaw up off the floor and sat down on the chair he’d had in a white-knuckled grip since the beginning of the situation. He heaved his seventh dramatic sigh of the day, side-eyeing Janus.

“Couldn’t you at least. . .do something? With the stump?” The prince attempted to huff a laugh. “You’re supposed to be all about mystery, aren’t you?”

“Is that what I am?” Janus mused, angling his head in a way that allowed his eyes to be shaded while his scales caught the light. “Well, this may come as a shock, but I’ve been trying to work on my pumpkin for that exact purpose.” Something sinister crept into his casual facade. “But, if you’d rather I try something else. . .”

Janus’ body raised at arm, first to drum his fingers against his throat before snapping those same fingers twice.

The golden smoke seemed to pause. It then grew darker and thicker, splitting itself down the middle to create two columns. And as those columns began to twist and ripple in place, their particles took on a much more organic shine.

Twin bone-rattling hisses crept into the air as row after row of scales spiraled throughout the vapor.

Two pairs of haunting, slit-pupils eyes blinked to life, automatically scrutinizing the area.

A matching set of sinuous skeletons flickered within the glow in a way that could reasonably be compared to an x-ray.

And just like that, within less of a minute, Janus suddenly had a new head.

Well, he technically had three heads now, but who was counting?

Certainly not Roman, who fell out of his chair with a shriek as the duo of huge, ethereal snakes now protruding from Janus’ neck tried to slither closer to him.

“How’s this look?” Janus asked, not batting an eyelid. “Do you think their scales compliment mine?”

“I think yOU SHOULD LEARN TO TAKE A DAMN JOKE!” Roman cried, shielding his face. “JUST GO BACK TO THE SLEEPY HOLLOW REFERENCE! IT SUITS YOU!”

“Splendid idea, Roman,” Janus simpered. With a couple more snaps of his fingers, the ghostly serpents evaporated, spiraling out of existence layer by layer. “It’s almost like I was trying to do that in the first place.”

“. . .That was an exceptional reference to Coatlicue,” Logan pronounced, with the intrigue in his eyes being a little more than mild.

“Of course it was,” Janus purred, somehow being smug and grateful at the same time.

“Co-How-Do-You-Say?” Patton, piped up. He was poking his head through the kitchen doorway yet again, probably having been lured back by the new commotion and (judging by the cocktail of confusion and fright on his face) was now most certainly questioning several of his choices.

As Logan began rattling off the basics of Aztec mythology, Roman climbed back onto his selected chair with a few petulant grumbles that might’ve been more colorful if not for Patton’s re-entry. He was quiet for the next moment or two, reaching across the table to drag a particular pumpkin closer.

“So. After we’re all done with putting the hollow in Halloween. . .” he eventually coughed. “. . .I don’t suppose you’d be up for a little chase-and-duel on horseback later tonight? I just organized a new little forest in the imagination. With a brook and a bridge, of course.”

Janus mulled this information over as he took a tiny saw into his hand and pushed it toward his chosen pumpkin. “I might be able to make some room in my planner.”

@sammys-magical-au @lickoutyourbrains @impatentpending @fangirltothefullest

#the thirteen days of goretober #goretober 2023 #my writing #my stories #sanders sides #janus sanders #remus sanders #roman sanders #logan sanders #patton sanders #tw body horror #tw blades #tw physical violence #tw acidic chemicals #tw skin melting #tw blood #tw snakes #tw mentions of food

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sanderssidesaddamsfamily · 8 months

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a library visit

a visit to the library … and a lil smooch

#sanders sides #sanders sides addams family au #patton sanders #logan sanders #logicality #remus sanders #logicality centric #janus sanders #first kiss fic #getting together

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agerefandom · 11 months

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Top 10: Tumblr vs. AO3

Just felt like doing some statistics with my work!! Comparing AO3 popular fics vs. tumblr popular fics and seeing what I found out: thought other people might be interested as well! Ramblings about patterns and causes are under the ‘read more’ :P

AO3 (by kudos):

Class Outing: BNHA, regressor!Izuku (1247 kudos)

Only Heaven I’ll Be Sent To: Resident Evil, regressor!reader, caregiver!Lady Dimitrescu (759 kudos)

Cold Palms, Warm Heart: Twilight, regressor!reader, caregivers!Alice and Jasper (573 kudos)

The Doctor’s Office: Twilight, regressor!reader, caregiver!Carlisle (403 kudos)

Kitchen Friends: Marvel, regressor!reader, caregiver!Steve and Bucky (336 kudos)

Sound and Silence: BNHA, regressor!Aizawa, cg!Hizashi (321 kudos)

Restrained: Death Note, regressor!Light, caregiver!L (309 kudos)

A Story For Sans: regressor!Sans, caregiver!Papyrus (278 kudos)

Home Sweet Home: caregivers!Carlisle and Esme, regressor!Cullens (273 kudos)

To Weather The Storm: caregiver!Tamaki, regressor!Haruhi (238 kudos)

Tumblr (fics only):

Class Outing (167 notes)

Cold Palms, Warm Heart (159 notes)

The Playtime Solution: Sanders Sides, regressor!Logan (159 notes)

The Doctor’s Office (150 notes)

Sugary Sweet: Twilight, regressor!reader, cg!Jasper and Alice (150 notes)

Kitchen Friends (125 notes)

Only Heaven I’ll Be Sent To (116 notes)

What Family Is: Harry Potter, regressor!reader, cg!Remus and Sirius (116 notes)

Just Plane Overwhelmed: Sanders Sides, regressor!Virgil (111 notes)

Golden Slumbers: Harry Potter, regressor!reader and Harry, cg!Fred (110 notes)

Overall Tumblr Top 10:

Caregiver Valerie Frizzle headcanons & moodboard (409 notes)

Writing Prompts 2019 / 2022 (290/365 notes)

Caregivers Tiana and Naveen headcanons (244 notes)

Caregiver Jack Skellington moodboard (229 notes)

Caregiver Morticia Addams moodboard (224 notes)

Regressor Wybie Moodboard (205 notes)

Caregiver Bruno Madrigal headcanons (201 notes)

Caregiver Jack Skellington headcanons (191 notes)

Caregivers Sundrop and Moondrop headcanons (189 notes)

Caregiver Belle headcanons (182 notes)

This was really interesting!!

Re: overall tumblr top 10: I think it’s funny that my throwaway moodboards are often some of the most popular content on my blog. Things I’m just like ‘ooh I gotta make this’ are mixed in with requests, I think that’s interesting! Ms. Frizzle just blowing away the competition, that’s amazing and I love it. Nothing is even close to how popular she is, and she deserves it. Jack Skellington coming onto the list twice? Come through king, I would love to write a full fic in Halloweentown sometime.

Generally, the more ‘alternative’ characters seem to get a lot more attention on my blog: The Pumpkin King, Morticia, Wybie, Sundrop and Moondrop... Tiana and Naveen really snuck up there though!

Moving onto the more direct fic comparison:

....well this made me realize that I never published my Sanders Sides fics from this blog on AO3, whoops

Setting that aside, fics with angst and plot tend to do better on AO3, while fluffy stories do better on tumblr: Sugary Sweet doesn’t even hit my top 10 on AO3 and it’s one of the fluffiest fics I’ve ever written, coming in at #5 on the tumblr list

On the other hand, Only Heaven I’ll Be Sent To is by far one of my best performing fics on AO3, but comes in at number 6 (tied with another fic) on tumblr, probably because it features a lot of action and gore alongside the fluffy agere elements, same for Restrained showing up on the AO3 top but not tumblr’s.

My Harry Potter fics do way better on tumblr, which is interesting? Maybe Harry Potter fans are still reading their fics on independent forums? Or Harry Potter folks on AO3 don’t cross over much with the agere crowd. (Or maybe they’re just overloaded with /reader fics) I haven’t been actually into the HP community since around 2011 so I’m not sure what’s up there.

Big shoutout to Class Outing for dominating the top of both lists: BNHA is such a big fandom that it makes sense, and I wrote that fic on @agere-fandom-time, which I think got more interaction than this blog: it seems like people are more comfortable interacting with a group-run blog, rather than an individual writer. Or maybe that’s a natural consequence of more writers putting out more consistent content, letting the blog get bigger. I’m not sure! Either way, even if I’m not into BNHA anymore, I feel like it’s a good piece of my writing, so I’m happy for it to be my top spot.

#how do i tag this lol #hark i say nothing #stella babbles in statistics #ao3 stats are one of my hobbies #i love to compare years and fandoms and ships and tags #i have like over a hundred graphs on my computer for different comparisons #i've considered making a sideblog for it #but i can also just ramble to my partner #like a person with a conspiracy board #it's great #links.... so many links

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