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drchucktingle · 4 months

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my masks

hey there buckaroos. due to all of the attention the TEXAS LIBRARY ASSOCIATION situation has gotten i am going to take a minute to talk about my personal way as an autistic buckaroo. im going to tell you about my masks.

im doing this for a few reasons, some are good FUN reasons full of love and some are not so great.

lets start with the GOOD STUFF. first of all, i am talking about this because speaking on my way can help other buckaroo feel more comfortable speaking on there own way, ESPECIALLY if they are good at ‘passing’ for neurotypical like chuck is.

unfortunately the NOT SO GREAT reasons im talking about all this dang stuff are two fold. reason one: i have been put into a position of having to explain and justify my needs and boundaries by the TXLA. this is not something that i WANT to be taking up all of my time, but when large organizations do not make space for those who they have pledged to support, it puts us smaller buckaroos into position where were have to defend our existence. it is not plesent but it is necessary.

the second NOT SO GREAT reason is that ‘passing’ bisexual and autistic people like myself are ALWAYS just seconds from being gatekept from folks both outside and inside these communities. there will probably be a day on chucks deathbed where i take off my mask and say hello to this timeline (mostly so you can all see how handsome i am under here but I DIGRESS). i KNOW with absolute certainty (the same way other bi and autistic buckaroos are probably nodding along right now) that when that day comes i will STILL be accused of ‘not being real’ and ‘faking’ because i ‘dont look autistic’ and i have a beautiful ladybuck partner in sweet barbara.

ALL THAT IS TO SAY, i am taking a moment today to talk FOR THE RECORD about my neurodigence and my particular needs. hopefully i will not have to keep diving this deep every time an organization takes a discrimantory action against me, but i will also say this: at least it is a good fight on an important battlefield

anyway buds, here is the story of my way on the spectrum

when i was a young buckaroo i knew that my thought process was different. i could socialize easily, which is unique in contrast to many autistic buds (it is a spectrum after all), but my social ease was for an interesting reason. I ALWAYS KNEW WHAT OTHERS WERE ABOUT TO SAY. it was like a strange ‘human game’ where someone would say one thing and i would think ‘well you actually mean something else’ in a sort of logical way (this is why i later related to DATA from star trek so dang much). at first i remember thinking ‘well i am just NOT going to play along with this human game’. i quickly learned neurotypical buckaroos do not like this, that there is a BOB AND WEAVE to social interactions that must be learned.

later i realized ‘actually if i WANT to make friends and prove love is real then i can do this like an expert because i can SEE the game where most cant’. this got chuck many buds and took me on many adventures. please understand, i am not saying these connections are not important to me, they are just different. they are full of love, but i express this in my own unique way.

HOWEVER, while growing up i felt disconnected from this timeline in other ways, like an alien or a reverse twin trotting along in a world that is not quite my own. i did not feel emotions the same way my buds did. they would get upset over the ‘human game’ interactions and i would not be moved at all, HOWEVER i could see the way sunlight hit a window and start crying my dang eyes out over the beauty. so my emotion was still there and VERY STRONG, i just felt it in more existential ways (like hearing the call of the lonesome train). these days that feeling has progressed to where i am pretty much in a constant blissed out state of cosmic emotional connection (make of that last sentence what you will, but it is the truth). when i make existential posts online i am not just FIRING OFF SOME CONTENT, i really mean every word. this is really my trot.

anyway as a young buckaroo these feelings made me worry sometimes. i thought about various mental health dianosises and marked the parts and pieces that matched with myself. am i this? am i that? sometimes, instead of just being’ different’ i worried i might actually be ‘wrong’.

when i saw david byrne on letterman in my younger days i immediately recognized something connected to myself. i thought ‘wow this is the mystery being solved before my very eyes.’ i could hear it in the music of talking heads too. i started doing research and realized that i might be on autism spectrum, something that was later confirmed by a therapist (back then the diagnosis was called asperger's). it was a glorious and fulfilling moment. i was SO EXCITED TO BE AUTISTIC LIKE MY HERO. i felt very cool because of it, and i still feel very cool because of it.

one of the big reasons i talk so much about being autistic these days is because i want to make sure OTHER buckaroos can have that same moment that i did. they can see chuck and think ‘wow i really like this autistic artist, maybe being autistic is cool’

so what does an average day WITHOUT wearing the pink bag look like for me?

my thought process is exactly like ROSE from CAMP DAMASCUS, which is part of why i wrote the book. we have the same stim (complex order of finger taps), we prepare for social interactions the same way, we analyze things in the same logical trot that neurotypical people might think feels ‘detached’ but for me feels natural (certain reviews of camp damascus are very funny to me in this way. you can tell when a reader is just very confused by existing in an autistic brain for 250 pages.)

from the outside you would not be able to tell that i am on the spectrum. in fact you would probably find me very socially adept.

the problem is, all of that masking can take its toll. i spent years trotting in and out the emergency room, talking to confused doctors who could not figure out the chronic phantom tension and pain that radiated through my body. i eventually accepted the fact that i would either live a life constantly on heavy painkillers or just stop living altogether.

eventually, however, i started noticing a correlation between the way that i felt, and the space that i allowed for chuck and the pink mask. i was exercising that tension, allowing my mental mask of neurotypical existence to take a rest. i started practicing physical therapy and this time THE RESULTS STUCK because i was approaching from two sides, MIND AND BODY. after a while, i got my pain down to about 5 percent of what it once was. i still have flare ups in times of stress, but the healing has been very real and life changing.

lets get VERY specific now. if i attended the TXLA confrence without a mask and gave my talk i can tell you this: i would do a dang good job. i can work the heck out of a crowd and (not to reveal too much about my secret way) I HAVE BEEN KNOWN TO DO THIS ON OCCASION VERY WELL. however, going home from this event i would very likely be in pain. i would likely need to do physical therapy. i would likely need to stim for a while. i would NOT be emotionally fullfilled in the same way. in other words, without my pink mask i can charm the heck out of buckaroos, but THE SPACE OF CHUCK TINGLE IS NOT THE SPACE FOR THAT. the pink bag is a place for me to not have to put up with that tension. it is a place for me to unmask mentally by masking physically.

this pink bag space SAVED MY LIFE and i am not going to risk blurring these lines. if and when that ever happens it will be MY decision, not someone elses. that is my boundary. the part of me that neurotypically masks could handle a library conference in a purely technical sense, but the part of me that chuck represents absolutely cannot and should not be asked to do that without the pink bag. unfortunately, the complexity of this point makes it even MORE difficult for me to think about and takes up even more of my time, because it forces me to START QUESTIONING MYSELF and my own needs. to be honest, that is the most insidious part of other people questioning your identify and refusing to accept your accommodation needs without ‘proof’.

the thing is, while all of this discussion of disability and accessibility is important, i have a much larger point to make by writing these words.

a conference should not uninvite someone with an unusual physical presentation or a strange way of speaking REGARDLESS of it being classified as a disability. it does not matter WHY i look the way that i look and wear what i wear. i should not have to spend all day writing this post instead of writing my next book, just because my sensibilities are unique and my presentation is unusual.

fortunately the solution is very simple: let other people be themselves. its not hurting you to simply accept and nod at the buckaroos you think look strange. let us exist

#actually autistic #chuck tingle #tingleverse #buckaroo lifestyle

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happy-beeeps · 19 days

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Sweat it out

Summary: tav comes down with a nasty flu, and one of her travel companions begins to worry... and maybe realize his feelings

WC: 1.3k

warnings: none i think! idiots in love

f!tav x reader

It’s quiet outside Astarion’s tent as he paces back and forth. Halsin has been inside with you for far too long, and the lack of communication has him worried. How long has it been since he hasn’t ended the night with your words, your breath near his? Weeks, months?

He doesn’t like to think of it. In fact, he’s doing an excellent attempt at thinking about anything else as he paces, and fails to notice the clatter of their camp members walking over to him.

“Chin up soldier, the rest of us seem okay, it probably has nothing to do with her tadpole.”

“Karlach is right,” Gale agrees, “it seems unlikely that the rest of us would be spared the same fate if this truly was connected to our wormy affliction. She will pull through.”

As much as it pains him to admit it, Gale is right. For all logical sense, this should have nothing to do with the mind flayers—but the thought offers little comfort (few things hinging on Gale’s ideas rarely do.)

It has started this morning, you had remarked how your head felt wrong. You felt wrong. You had ignored it, had soldiered on. As the day progressed, you complained of aches that had not been there, of chills that ran down your arms. Your skin grew pallor, covered in a sheen of sweat. By the end of the night, a cough ragged at your chest, and you could do nothing f else but whimper to yourself. The slightest motion had set tears out of your eyes, your skin burning itself to rid your body of whatever was happening.

Only Halsin, Lae’zel, and Shadowheart accompanied you now, the two healers were working overtime on an attempt to find your ailment, and Lae’zel was not easily persuaded to leave behind one of her dearest friends.

Astarion thinks of the dagger pressed to poor Wyll’s throat when he kindly attempt to guide her towards a spot nearest the fire.

He’s worried about you. This isn’t new, he’s made peace with the reality that he cares for you, he just hasn’t figured out how to say it. Now, he fears the opportunity may be slipping from him.

It’s Halsin’s booming voice that calms his nerves, he and the other two step out from the tent, his grin palpable even from where Astarion is standing. “She’ll be fine. It’s a nasty virus, I’ve given her a brew to aid in the healing, and I’ve created tonics for the rest of us.”

As he passes them out, Shadowheart walks up to Astarion, who is quickly making his way towards your tent. “You… don’t need a tonic. On the account of you being, you know. Not really alive.”

“You’ve got such a way with words, really,” he breathes, but his eyes flicker to the flap of your tent, “so I can go see her?”

Lae’zel speaks up, placing a firm pat on his arm as she walks by, “she’s certainly been asking for you.”

* * *

You have two clear, feverish trances.

The first is of your mother. A memory that’s not uncommon, one you drift back to anytime you attempt to rest an illness away. Its familiarity brings comfort as you attempt to sweat this bug out, and ignore Halsin and Shadowheart’s proding over your body.

The other is… newer. One you hadn’t expected. You’re in a secluded section of camp, feet tapping against the water, skin swathed in moonlight. Your wearing nothing other than a long, white shirt, unlaced dangerously along the neck. This is no more than two days ago.

You follow the memory along, watch from your eyes as you trace circles along your bare thighs, until you look to your side. Astarion is there, eyes swimming with emotion, as he gnaws on his lip.

Memory Astarion reaches out, grabbing your hand, weaving your fingers together. “I’m glad you’ve convinced me to stick around after our escapades, you are entirely addicting.”

Memory you leans against him, pressing your weight against his. His skin is cool, the chill sending tiny bumps along your exposed legs. “I’m glad you’ve decided to humor me, Star.”

You’re mortified when your eyes flutter open, your mouth in the process of muttering his name, to realize he’s here. Next to you. In your tent. As you sweat through probably a third pair of smallclothes.

“You rang?” He’s cheeky when he speaks, but his hand goes to palm your stomach quickly, as if he’s checking to make sure you’re here, you’re still you. The concern is sweet, and it sends an all new kind of flush across your body.

“Feel so sick, Star.” Shit. Is that tiny little voice coming from you?

He moves then, gentler than he’s ever moved before, carefully contorting his body around yours and pressing you against him. In an instant, it’s like a salve to your soul. You’re covered in him—his smell, his weight, his temperature. The chill itself is a whole other soothe to your aches.

“I know you are darling, but Halsin said you’ll be better soon.”

“Can’t get you sick,” a cough takes your lungs briefly, “who’s gonna pick the locks for us then?”

He laughs, and smooths a few stray hairs out of your face. “I won’t. Officially medically cleared, according to Shadowheart. On the account of my ‘not being alive.’”

You move to nod your head, but the pain makes you stop. Astarion is quick, and he cushions the movement with his hand before pressing a kiss to your forehead. “I hear you were dreaming about me?”

“Maybe. Lots of trances. You know how it goes.”

“Was it particularly scandalous? Is that why my little love is so keen to swear?”

“Don’t have it in me to hit you.”

“You wouldn’t dream of it.”

It’s a calm silence that takes you next, Astarion stroking your hair as you listen to the distant clamor of your friends. You break it, after another moment.

“I remembered my mother.”

You don’t often talk about your family, and he knows this. He moved just slightly so you can see his face, curiosity and warmth covering his eyes. “What was it?”

“When I was little, I got sick, nothing bad but still sick. My mother, she’d rub my hair and sing to me,” you pause to close your eyes, as if you could will her here right now, “she’d go to our kitchens and shoo the cooks out, she’d make me her special soup, and when she brought it to me she’d promise me she’d teach me one day.”

“She sounds lovely.”

“She was. Smart too. She always knew things about me that I didn’t know.”

“Oh, like what?” Astarion’s face shimmers with a laugh and you use the last bit of your strength to attempt a shrug and burrow into his chest.

“She used to tell me she knew I’d end up with someone older. Don’t know if she knew how old.”

After your words, as if in cue, your chest begins its steady rise and fall, and Astarion recognizes the twitch in your fingers. You’re trancing again. Which means he’s stuck with your words and their heavy implications.

Still, with the way your overheating body simmers against his cold touch, he resolved that he doesn’t mind their weight, not at all. In fact, he’d like more of your burden.

You don’t slip out of your trance that night, but feel the briefest ghost of a kiss on your forehead.

When sunlight rolls around, your eyes blink awake. You’re weak, you can feel it, but better. You go to sit up, but realize quickly Astarion’s weight is still against you, one arm cradling your head to his chest, one arm twisted beneath you.

You’ve never quite felt so comfortable, so held. You don’t remember what you told him last night, don’t remember exactly what he said. Instead, you decided to live in this moment now, and pray to all the gods you’ll get to relive it again soon.

#astarion x tav #astarion x reader #astarion #bg3 astarion #astarion bg3 #bg3 #bg3 tav #bg3 fic #astarion ancunin #astarion ancunin x reader

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xstevex-world · 1 year

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Steve Harrington’s favourite musician has been the same since he was 17.

He distinctly remembers hearing Chrissy Cunningham play in his car radio during his senior year, subsequently listening to nothing but her breakout EP for a week straight - and that was just the beginning.

He followed all of work for over the past 7 years: bought physical and digital copies of all her albums, watched every music video multiple times, read every interview, saved up enough while working weekend shifts at scoops to get tickets to her sold out shows in Indiana - he had so much merch that Jonathan Byers once joked that Steve could probably make a shrine to his idol.

He had even kept up during her hitatus, almost two full years of radio silence from the star, like she had disappeared off the face of the earth. It wasn’t the worst thing that had ever happened, but it didn’t help that it overlapped with him dropping out of business school to pursue a career in cosmetology and that final falling out he had with his father over his choice in education.

The day she came back felt like Christmas.

Her comeback announcement dropped on June 13th - and it wasn’t just a new post on social media or a candid shot online someone managed to snap.

It was a whole EP drop, 4 entire songs (and a music video) that he knew he was going to play on repeat after 716 days of radio silence.

That opened the floodgates for everything to start again: she went back on social media, thanked her fans for their wholehearted response to her new releases. She started doing interviews again: discussing her mental health and the impact of her mothers control in her life; her reunion with her best friend (and apparent ex) from high school; her label dropping her after it was found that her “momager” had embezzled a huge amount of money from said company, releasing her from her contract early and allowing her to find new partners, new producers, new projects.

She talks about how she’s never been happier, and Steve can’t help but beam at it. He can hear it in her music, how it’s going more against the grain of what’s popular, opting instead for etherial synths mixed with heavy guitars. She sings about heartbreak and moving on and being better than then the people who brought her down for long, now that she’s starting fresh.

Steve loves it, thinks some of the changes have something to with Eddie Munson’s name appearing in the credits of all her new material.

Truthfully, he got curious after someone on Twitter posted a screengrab of cameos made by Munson and his own bandmates in all of her new music videos. He thankful someone else made the connection, and although he’s not the biggest fan of Corroded Coffin’s music (apart from the collaboration EP they did with Chrissy: “CCxCC presents Satanic Slumber Party”, that was incredible), he would lying if he didn’t say he was totally enamoured by Eddie goddamn Munson.

Let alone the fact that he’s totally Steve’s type (big hair, bigger eyes, a complete dork with a heart of gold but who also looks like he would bite someone in both a feral dog and a “please take me to your bedroom right now” kind of way), the guy is a genius when it comes to music, spending interviews talking about the process of artistry and the importance of storytelling - even when they’re discussing songs about him, written by Chrissy about their break up, he’s still so passionate and witty, the two of them spending interviews bouncing off each other in a way that would rival his relationship Robin.

He’s fine, really, he knows logically this is just a celebrity crush that will pass if he stops thinking about it for long enough, but he’s certain that this could develop into one of those all encompassing obsessions if he doesn’t curb it now- and that’s exact what he does. He tries to put that energy into school, excelling more than he ever did in an academic setting. He meets up more often with Nancy, Jonathan, Argyle and Barb, inviting them over more often for dinner or drinks, sometimes even just because he wants to make a breakfast feast and need someone else to eat it.

It’s at times like this that he misses Robin, who only has about 6 weeks left of her internship in Paris - he hasn’t seen her in person since he went to visit her a few months ago during spring break. He wishes she was her to openly judge him over this, before rambling on about her own current hyperfixation or moaning about her lack of romantic adventures since she and Vickie broke up.

They still talk on the phone every afternoon (nighttime for her), ranting to each other about their perspective day and sharing any worthwhile gossip.

Tonight’s no different, he’s telling her about the current drama happening in his classes when Robin says:

“I met someone today.”

He’s ecstatic - in his opinion robin deserves the world and the fact she’s met someone on her own in a city where she has been finding it hard interacting with people outside of her placement is a miracle in itself.

She tells him more: how she met this girl that morning at café, acting as a knight in shining armour (Robin’s words, not Steve’s) when the girl got flustered trying to order her coffee in broken French; how she spent the day showing this girl around to her favourite shops and parks and museums; how they spent hours talking about everything and nothing; how Robin hasn’t felt this way about someone since Vickie.

“So then we had dinner at that Italian place, the one I took you to, and, Steve, oh my goddess, she has the cutest little laugh-“

“Did you get her name?”

“Oh, sorry” he can hear her move the phone from one ear to the other. “Yeah it’s Chrissy.”

Steve stops his pacing. That would be one hell of a coincidence, if it was Chrissy Cunningham. She is playing in Paris the following night, the penultimate stop of her current tour. (The very show that he had been tempted to go to, since he could stay with Robin. It absolutely wasn’t because Corroded Coffin was joining her for the European leg of the tour - acting as her band, as well as performing songs from their collaboration as the encore - something that did not happen at any of the American shows). It couldn’t be the same Chrissy that Robin had fallen head over heels for in the space of a few hours, right?

“Did you get any of her socials?” He asks, cautiously.

“Nope,” she answers, popping the p for emphasis. “I didn’t think to ask, because I’m an idiot and all that-“

“Robs,” he interrupts, trying to keep his voice steady. “You’re not an idiot.”

Her hears her laugh on the other end of the line, the same kind of self-deprecating giggle she uses when she’s nervous. He wishes he was there with her so she could see him roll his eyes at her, their main way of communicating their love.

“What did she look like?”

“Oh!” She exclaims as he hears her tumbling over something (knowing Robin, probably herself). “We took a picture together, hold on, I’ll send it over.”

His phone vibrates against his ear, so he brings it in front of him, putting Robin on speaker so he can see the photo.

And.

Holy fuck.

“Robin,” he says slowly, because he actually can’t believe it himself. “Do you know who that is?”

((Part 2))

#stranger things #stranger things au #steve harrington #eddie munson #robin buckley #chrissy cunningham #Steddie #steve x eddie #steve harrington x eddie munson #Buckingham #bandcheer #robin x chrissy #robin buckley x chrissy cunningham #Luci’s ST thoughts

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muzansfangs · 8 months

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If you were their soulmate.

Starring: Aizen Sosuke x f!reader; Mayuri Kurotsuchi x f!reader; Uryuu Ishida x f!reader.

Format: head canons

Warnings: fluff, basically. Also, be aware that Uryuu is aged up and that Aizen’s part has some toxic traits. He is a walking red flag, after all.

Plot: how would they act if you were their soulmate and they were genuinely in love with you? Was it love at first sight, or were you two just friends at first?

Requested by: @stygianoir I’m sorry if it took me a while! I hope you liked it!

﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏

Uryuu Ishida.

• For someone as logical and rational as him, it was impossible to believe it was love at first sight. Could something like that possibly exist? He did not trust his own feelings around you. You were a good person, he felt comfortable around you. Yet, the way you always seemed to understand him and support every decision he made was quite disturbing. It was impossible to be that connected to someone. It almost felt like a spiritual connection.

• He probably did not have any filter around you and was not afraid to show you his true colors. He was fine with not being judged as soemone too analytical and detached, for once. He liked the way you made him feel normal.

• He did not let anyone hurt you, or offend you in any way. It did not matter if it was during a fight, or in a more casual occasion. He even snapped at Ichigo out of the blue because he had accidentally spilt some coffee on your papers. You found it odd, of course, but it was sweet at some extent.

• He never failed to notice how beautiful you were. He always thought your appearence whetted his appetites, but he restrained himself from crossing the line of friendship for months. Why? He was frightened by the idea of losing you. What if you didn’t want him back? You two were definitely better off as friends. Or so he thought until something happened.

• Something happened, right. That was Ichigo trying to hit on you. He could not let that happen. Now he was absolutely sure that he could be a better boyfriend material than him, therefore he quickly made up his mind and decided to talk to you. Man on a mission: he interrupted Ichigo’s little speech and literally dragged you away from him.

• He thought it would have been easier for someone like him, so logical and precise. He was so wrong. As you two were alone and he could finally confess his feelings to you, he felt his heart sink into his chest. Oh, damn, your eyes. It was all your cute eyes’s fault. He got distracted! Naturally, he messed up his little mental plan on how to make you understand he liked you. Yet, it was cute.

• “Your eyes are so pretty. They leave me speechless” he simply blurted out, clenching his fists down his sides.

• A long silence followed that as you both blushed and you blinked at him in confusion. Uryuu panicked, of course, and the tips of his ears turned red. He knew words were not his forte at this point and he thought about kissing you instead.

• Yet, you surprised him when you said “I love you too, if that’s what you meant. Your eyes not quite bad too, by the way” you whispered, smiling softly.

• Uryuu smiled weakly and hugged you tightly. Yes, there was no doubt about it. You were definitely his soulmate. But his brain had short-circuited again and you had to clear your throat to remind him that he should have kissed you and not hugged you.

Aizen Sosuke.

• It was love at first sight. Or obsession, at first sight. He believed in that concept, but he never thought it would have ever happened to him. He was too self-centered, affected by his god complex and detached from any human emotion to feel a connection with someone. You were more than his obsession, at first. He was curious about you and how you simply seemed to break his walls and go with his flow without getting cut on his edges.

• As you two spent time together, he started to do some researches about the nature of some spiritual bonds among individuals and he found out that you two were most likely soulmates. What a shock. Aizen knew one thing for sure: if you were his soulmate, he had to have you by his side no matter what.

• ‘No matter what’ was a devious concept for him. Why? He did not care about what was the price to pay to win to you over, he would have done it. Or kidnapped you.

• As he watched you stroll around and talking with Shinji, he definitely uttered something among the lines of “Mine of no one else’s”. That night he trimmed his former Captain’s hair. Not long before that, Shinji became one of Aizen’s victims.

• As you seemed to be naturally drawn to him, though, he simply welcomed you into his life. He loved showing you a little soft side of him no one knew. You spent a lot of time sipping on tea and talking about calligraphy. You were so perfect for him. And he definitely loved it when you got too tired and fell asleep over his shoulder.

• Your natural predisposition for meddling into his business and figuring out his plans made him go crazy and he was soon forced to have a serious talk in the middle of the woods with you. You had stand by his side. If you were soulmates, you would have probably agreed in whatever wicked plans he had. Right?

• “Is this the part where you give me the choice to either follow you, or die right here? Of course I am in” you said, as he confronted you. Oh, the wolfish grin plastered over his face at that point was priceless.

• You were not as cruel as he was. You simply stack by his side and followed his orders, but he tried to keep your hands as clean as possible. After all, a beauty as yourself could not become too blood-thirsty. He did not want you to become as Gin, he was happy with having you glued by his hip.

• His confession was smooth. Right before he tricked Hinamori, he invited you to watch the fireworks together. After all, everybody did it and it would have been simply suspicious not to attend the mundane event. However, as you were sitting on the rooftop next to him, eyes twinkling for the technicolor lights exploding in the night sky, he grasped your jaw rather roughly and kissed you passionately.

• “Did I make it loud and clear?” he simply purred in your ear. Of course not. It was more than enough.

Mayuri Kurotsuchi.

• You caught the eye of this man. He probably wanted to experiment on you at first! Yet, as he studied your features better, he had to admit that you were too pretty for that and… What was that strange attraction he felt towards you? He wanted to know you, to be around you, to study you and not on you. The first thing he did after your first meeting was searching for answers and he got thunderstruck when he found them. He had a soulmate? That was absurd. It was weird thinking that you would have been able to understand him wholly and bear him at his worst.

• Ladies and gentlemen, he tried to be polite. The next day he tracked you down and apologized for his behavior. He told you he did not want to use you as a cavy anymore but that it would have been nice of you to help him understand if soulmates existed. That was his attempt to befriend you and it worked. He did not tell you he suspected you to he his soulmate at first. He did not want to scare you away.

• You two spent most of the time in his laboratory, helping him with his researches or, watching him do them, because he lost his patience over everything. But, eventually, you snapped. You tamed that maniac man by literally yelling at his face to calm down.

• He got offended at first.

• That little voice inside him told him to forgive you right away, though. How frustrating it was!

• After struggling to find a solution to a chemistry problem and you casually walked by dropping the solution, he was left speechless. He spent three alone, in the privacy of his room, to talk to himself about how could someone beat him at his own game.

• Months went by just like that, until you decided to sneak into his private room and rummage through his stuff. Finally, you found a file with your name over it and you were quite shocked to read that you were his soulmate. You planned to make your move on him, since he seemed to be too stubborn to confront you about it. However luck was not in your favor.

• He caught you with the papers in your hands and he fumed in anger.

• You were not even surprised by the argument that followed. It had become amusing at this point. But you knew how to turn the tables in your favor. As he yelled at you, you walked up to him slowly until just mere inches devided your faces.

• “How could you do that? You little—” he ranted, throwing his hands in the air as you simply captured his lips in yours with a kiss. Man, he stopped screaming and turned red from head to toe.

• “Oh. That was so much overdued, actually” he commented, rubbing his chin before kissing you again.

#bleach x reader #uryu ishida #uryu x reader #uryu x y/n #bleach uryu #ishida uryuu #bleach mayuri #mayuri x reader #mayuri kurotsuchi #aizen x reader #aizen x you #sosuke aizen x reader #aizen sosuke x reader #sosuke aizen #uryuu ishida #bleach aizen #aizen x y/n #bleach headcanons

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essenceofelegance · 1 month

Text

new year’s day

Luke Castellan x aphrodite!reader

m.list

warnings: angst </3

There's glitter on the floor after the party,

He’s giving her that smile.

The one reserved for you.

The one you adored so, so much.

Girls carrying their shoes down in the lobby

Luke took her hand in his larger one, leading her back to her cabin.

He laughed at something she said.

You directly your attention back to cleaning up the Aphrodite cabin after a party, alone.

Luke used to do it with you.

Candle wax and Polaroids on the hardwood floor You and me from the night before, but

While you were cleaning you own bed, you found a polaroid picture of you and Luke from a year ago, probably.

You were wearing a pink, feathered cowboy hat, you were leaning into the camera, a bright smile on your face.

Luke’s hands were on your waist, he had a pink fur boa around him to match your hat.

You would give anything to have him hold you just one more time.

Don't read the last page But I stay when you're lost, and I'm scared, and you're turning away

Of course he would like an Athena girl.

They’re smart, they can fight, and they’re pretty.

Sure, she doesn’t have that radiant glow around her like you did, but she was still pretty.

She had h/c hair, like you did.

She also had e/c eyes.

But her’s… looked so much better than yours. It glowed.

She looked better, she could fight better, she was actually smart.

Your siblings reassured you, insisting that you were a daughter of Aphrodite, there was no way she was prettier than you.

But that wasn’t the way you saw it.

And in your eyes, that wasn’t the way Luke saw it either.

I want your midnights But I'll be cleaning up bottles with you on New Year's Day

You were teaching your usual archery lessons, when you spot Luke and his new girlfriend in a sparring match.

He looks happy.

Only, a different kind of happy.

Sure, you were good with a dagger, but not sword fighting. You were never good at sword fighting, you were only good at archery.

Maybe Luke wanted something who appreciated the things he liked to do.

You squeeze my hand three times in the back of the taxi I can tell that it's gonna be a long road

"It's not you, it never was, its just that I feel like we don’t get each other anymore." Luke said.

"Yeah, I get it." you looked down to hide your unshed tears.

"Thanks for... everything," you gave him a forced smile.

“You were great. You were a great experience,” Luke said, as if to comfort you.

‘You were everything!’ you wanted to scream at him.

But you just smiled and walked away.

I'll be there if you're the toast of the town, babe Or if you strike out and you're crawling home

You watched as Luke celebrated his capture the flag victory with his new girlfriend.

You weren’t jealous,

you just felt replaced.

How could he replace you so easily when you felt like your heart would be empty for years?

Did you really mean that little to him?

You couldn’t bear watching them anymore.

Don't read the last page But I stay when it's hard, or it's wrong, or we're making mistakes

A total of 17 guys sent you flowers.

If you were a logical person, you would have at least hooked up with them, but little old you decided that you should wait for Luke.

So, you rejected every single guy that came up to you.

All your siblings are just straight up worried about you now, they knew how important Luke was to you, but not to this degree.

You still cry yourself to sleep every night,

they find you in the middle of the night going through a photo book of you and Luke.

I want your midnights But I'll be cleaning up bottles with you on New Year's Day

Hold on to the memories They will hold on to you

You still wear the matching bracelet he gave you for your second anniversary.

He’s wearing a new one with his girlfriend.

You see them connecting their magnetic heart charm on their bracelet at campfires, while you’re here playing with yours that no longer had a match.

Hold on to the memories They will hold on to you

You still have his favourite hoodie under your bed.

You still have his favourite shirt under your bed.

You still have one of his camp t-shirts on your bed.

He caught you wearing his hoodie on you way to the bathroom in the middle of the night when you bumped into him.

He never questioned you or asked for it back.

Hold on to the memories They will hold on to you

You still have everything he gave you.

And I will hold on to you.

Everything reminds you of him.

That one bench where the two of you used to hang out on everyday,

ever your own bed, where he used to sneak in to talk to you at night.

Please don't ever become a stranger Whose laugh I could recognise anywhere

You hate it when she makes him laugh.

You hate it when you hear that damn laugh.

You hate it because it didn’t happen because of you.

Please don't ever become a stranger Whose laugh I could recognise anywhere

You hate him because he’s not yours.

There's glitter on the floor after the party Girls carrying their shoes down in the lobby

It’s been a couple of months.

You still wear his hoodie to sleep.

liked this? or want something better? City of Stars is much more heartbreaking </3

author: yay

⋆

Please do not re-upload my work on any platforms without permission.

Any reblogs, comments, likes, shares, and follows are appreciated.

#pjo fic #pjo fanfic #pjo characters #pjo luke #pjo series #pjo #percy jackson show #percy jackson #luke castellan x reader #luke castellan imagine #luke castellan #luke castellan pjo #luke castellan fanfic #luke pjo #charlie bushnell #pjo imagine #taylor swift

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marvelstoriesepic · 2 months

Text

Listen to your gut

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Summary: Bucky is assigned on a Hydra mission. Letting him venture back in the lion’s den without backup sets a deep unsettling dread knotting your stomach. Drowning out logic and reason you beg him to stay.

Word count: 2.8k

Warnings: angst, fluff

author’s note: Soft!Bucky here y’all

Masterlist

Something was wrong.

You knew it the moment you stepped foot in the debriefing room, getting unpleasantly greeted by those red tentacles of the Hydra symbol. A triggering wave of unease washed over you and a chill ran down your spine. The stark contrast of the red tentacles against the whiteboard felt like a sinister omen, a reminder of current dangers.

Technically you were on bed rest due to two broken ribs you received during the last mission you had with Steve, Nat, and Clint. Normally Bucky would join any mission you participated in even if he wasn’t needed but he couldn’t fathom the thought of not being able to protect you and stay in your reach.

Unfortunately though Tony, Banner, and he flew to Wakanda a few days prior due to research purposes on his new arm. Bucky wanted you to join him but since you were leading a training program for the new coming shield agents you were tied to the compound.

Already unpleased Bucky surely wasn’t happy to hear that you and the others got called in last minute and were already on your way to Siberia. He couldn’t get any updates on you the whole day and felt pretty helpless in Wakanda. He knew you were more than capable of holding your own in any situation. Your skills were unparalleled, your determination was unwavering. But despite his confidence in your abilities, he couldn’t shake the gnawing worry that gripped his heart. He loved you. And he worried. And he hated the thought of you being out there fighting the bad guys instead of crunching on chips on the couch, sparring with Nat, or joking with Sam all safe and sound in the compound.

So when Bucky heard of what you injured he was reeling. He couldn’t keep still, asked about updates on you every two minutes, scared a few kids with his glares after not being able to connect and talk to you on the first try and annoyed even Tony, usually immune to Bucky’s intensity, to the point where he was willing to fly back to the compound earlier than wanted.

After being able to communicate, you told him you’d be fine and you’d just be on bed rest for the next two weeks and he should just stay there until everything’s figured out but Bucky wasn’t hearing any of that. He just wanted to get home, hold his girl, and see for himself that you were truly okay.

So here you were, one week later sitting on a chair next to Bucky and looking up to Steve, who started detailing the mission plan, with that looming dread blooming in your stomach, refusing to be ignored.

You knew it wasn’t necessary for you to be here and listen to a mission plan you couldn’t participate in but it included Bucky. Healing took him a lot of time and you all knew he wasn’t completely over it. He never will be. How could anyone blame him? So you weren’t gonna let him sit through this alone to talk and hear about the organization that held him captive so many decades of his life.

Said man was currently sitting next to you, he scooted your chair to knock at his before you even sat on it to have you as near as possible. Your thighs were touching and his hand was linked to yours resting in your lap. Although it should probably be hard for him to sit here and hear Steve talk about those people while seeing them in pictures right beside him, Bucky’s main worry was you.

But you were uncomfortable. Not because of your injuries, you forgot them the second you got here, but because of that pit in your gut that wouldn’t stop increasing.

Bucky's gaze lingered on your profile a little longer the next time he looked at you, a slight crease in his brow. His concern for you was evident in every glance, every reassuring touch, but even his unwavering support couldn’t dispel the growing sense of unease that knotted your stomach. You knew you had no logical reason to feel this way, no tangible evidence of danger, but the nagging voice in the back of your mind refused to be silenced.

His name called by Steve made Bucky's head turn away from you but his grip didn’t falter.

As Steve spoke, his words washing over you like a distant murmur, you found it increasingly difficult to focus. Despite your best efforts, the details of the mission blurred together, overshadowed by the relentless drumbeat of your anxiety.

A squeeze of your hand helped you return your focus and you looked over to Bucky, his concerned gaze already on you. You sat up straighter, squeezed his hand back, and gave him a curt nod and a quick kiss on his cheek. With that, you moved your gaze toward Steve and pretended to listen.

Bucky’s focus was entirely on you still while he moved your joined hands to his mouth and kissed your knuckles affectionately. He was adamant about talking to you now, wanting to chase away whatever shadows were clouding your mind, but he knew this wasn’t the time.

You actually caught a few things here and there about what Bucky's tasks would be on that mission during the rest of the meeting and although it was pretty simple, especially for a 6ft super soldier with a metal arm, your worries didn’t ease. It also didn’t exactly relax you knowing he wouldn’t have any backup.

As the meeting drew to a close, you rose from your seat, your hand still firmly clasped in Buckys. His touch grounded you, anchoring you to the present as you navigated the seemingly endless hallway back to your room. With each step, the weight of your worries grew heavier, your hands trembling with the force of your emotions. Your bottom lip was hurting through the pull your teeth had on it. Bucky didn’t let go of you once. He opted to move his arm around you and pulled you into his side, kissing your head softly every now and then, and didn’t let up until you entered your room.

He closed the door with his foot and turned you to face him, moving his hands up to your face to cup your cheeks and take a better look at you.

“Baby what’s-”

“Don’t go!” you just blurted it out, interrupting him. But you needed to say it.

Bucky blinked, a little flashed at your urgency and the near desperation lacing your features. He swiped his thumbs over your cheeks, lips parted and searching your face. He took a breath but before he was able to utter a word you forestalled him.

“Don’t go on that mission Bucky!” you pleaded, voice wavering. It felt ridiculous and absurd to beg him to stay, to ask him to set aside his duty for the sake of your own fears. Missions were his job after all and you couldn’t explain what you were feeling exactly but just thinking about Bucky venturing into the heart of Hydra once again without any backup knocked your breath away, logic and reason drowned out. You couldn’t bear the idea of him facing such dangers alone, not after all he had been through.

Feeling hot and cold at the same time you felt goose bumps rising on your arms underneath your sweater. You didn’t need to see them to know they were there, desperately holding onto Bucky's wrists, clinging to him as if he were the only anchor keeping you grounded. Nothing you did however shook the feeling that something was wrong, that sending your Bucky into the lion’s den without any backup was a recipe for disaster.

Bucky ran his hand over your hair. He picked up on your elaborate breaths and your heartbeat increased erratically. You couldn’t even feel the normally soothing contrast of flesh and metal on your skin.

“Hey, it’s alright,” he whispered softly and leaned down to press a gentle kiss on your forehead. “I’m here, sweetheart. Talk to me. What’s wrong?”

Your teeth were still grinding on your lip until Bucky lifted his thumb to your chin to get it out of its death grip. He smothered the irritation on your lips with his finger while you avoided looking at him. You didn’t know how to explain your sneaking suspicion, didn’t know how he’d react to you just having some gut feeling. Cause that’s all it was. But if there was something you remembered of your grandmother it was to always listen to your gut sweetheart. It may save lives one day. You kept that in mind, a comforting reminder of the importance of trusting your instincts.

In junior high, you got asked out on a date by some guy a little older than you. You said yes and excitedly dolled yourself up later that day. But before you even got to leave the house, you felt it. A shiver ran down your spine, muscles contorted, and that uncomfortable dread loomed inside your stomach. Your body was basically screaming at you to turn away from the doorknob and not to leave the house. You listened. You sent the guy a quick apology saying something important came up and stayed inside. Up until today, you didn’t know if that suspicion was justified but you didn’t hear anything from that guy again.

Now, faced with a similar feeling of unease, you couldn’t ignore the warning signs that your body was sending you.

Your name being called, uncertain and concerned, cut through the haze of your thoughts. Baby blue eyes reached your vision again, Bucky having tilted your head to meet his gaze. You cleared your throat, a lump burning there.

“Uhm..I,” you took a shaken breath, “I just-” Your brows were furrowed and you closed your eyes for a second to get a hold of yourself and gather your thoughts.

Bucky still ran gentle fingers along your cheekbones, his body pressed against yours with his chest leaning back a bit to see you better. Worry lines creased his forehead, brows pulled together almost painfully and with a look so perturbed and as anxious as you although you hadn’t voiced what was on your apprehensive mind yet.

“I just feel like…” your voice trailed off, words faltering as you struggled to articulate the unease gnawing at you from within. You bit the inside of your cheek, but Bucky's light nod encouraged you to continue despite your doubts. “I just have a bad feeling about all this,”you finally managed to say, the admission leaving a bitter taste in your mouth.

God, how would he think of you? Making such a fuss and worrying him out of his mind to tell him all you had was a bad feeling. You felt ridiculous again, burdening Bucky with your irrational fears when logic dictated otherwise. Letting out a huff at yourself you tried to leave Bucky’s hold, but he wouldn’t budge.

His metal arm wound around your back, pressing you back in his chest, the worry lines on his face might as well be permanent by now. He lifted your chin to meet his eyes. They were still so soft and understanding behind all the agitation. “A bad feeling?” he repeated, his voice gentle and devoid of judgment. All you could hear was his concern for your frenzy state.

Taking a deep breath you looked back at him. “Yeah, I just- I have that kinda gut feeling something’s gonna happen and I...I don’t know I-”

“Hey,” Bucky called again, moving his metal hand up and down your spine. “It’s alright baby. Steve said I probably won’t even have to engage in combat too much. It’s a quick in and out for all of us. It’s not an active base, we’re just there to gather intel.”

“Then they could do this without you.”

Bucky’s patient and understanding expression softened. “Theoretically they could,” he conceded. “But I’m good at going in there baby, don’t worry your pretty little head. And Steve would have sent somebody with me if he thought it wasn’t safe.”

You shook your head, frustration clear to see on your face. He just didn’t get it. And you couldn’t blame him for that. He was still not used to someone worrying about him. He was the last person to worry about himself and it broke your heart the first time you met him as it did now. He didn’t understand that you couldn’t live if something was to happen to him. So if your gut feeling could save his life you sure as hell would make him believe it was worth it.

“Buck!” It came out as a desperate plea, your voice cracking with desperation. Tears welled in your eyes as you clung to him, fists clenched tightly around his shirt “I’m begging you, please don’t go!” Your words were barely above a whisper, but the intensity of your plea spoke volumes.

All you could think about was the thought of losing him, the unbearable pain that would consume you if he were to be harmed. Your fear was raw and unfiltered, laid bare for him to see.

His initial reassurance fell away as he realized the depth of your fear, your vulnerability tearing at his own resolve. “Hey, look at me doll!” He grabbed your face in both hands again, wiping a lone tear away that left your eye. His expression grew painfully serious. “Don’t cry baby, please! It’s alright!”

He leaned down to press his lips to your forehead. More tears slipped past your lashes onto your cheeks and Bucky wiped them away immediately, looking pained himself.

With gentle hands, he kept cradling your face, pressing soft kisses to your forehead, his own eyes betraying the turmoil within him, so he squeezed them shut.

“Don’t go!” you whispered again, closing your eyes. It was all you could say.

He couldn’t bear to see you in such anguish, couldn’t fathom leaving your side when you needed him most. His forehead rested on yours. “I won’t go! Won’t go, baby, I’ll stay here.” He repeated his words as a mantra tugging you in a tightened embrace while whispering promises in your ear, his face in your hair.

Bucky’s heart clenched at the sight of your distress, his own anxiety rising in response to your tears and pleas. Your love for him was a beacon in the darkness of his past, a light that guided him through even the toughest of times. His thoughts often played with him by giving him scenarios of you dying. Of him losing you and what that would mean to his life. Well, he wouldn’t have a life anymore. Facing the possibility that you would feel the same if something were to happen to him was both, a burden and a relief. He felt a sense of helplessness wash over him. You always prided him on being strong, but in that moment, he felt powerless in the face of your fear.

You mourning his loss was a reality he couldn’t bear to contemplate, a future he refused to accept. So he did what he had to. He vowed to stay by your side, to forsake the mission and the risks it entailed in favor of your well-being.

He knew about the gravity of his choice. Steve would have to replan the whole thing, although he might be understanding, but this couldn’t necessarily be said about the other team members. Maybe he’ll be benched on the next few missions. But you finding the courage to confront your fears and laying yourself bare like that to him made him immensely proud. So in that moment, none of the consequences mattered. All that mattered was you, your safety, and the certainty of your love.

His words were a balm to your frazzled nerves, a soothing melody in the chaos of your mind. You clung to him, hands making wrinkles in his shirt, feeling grateful beyond words, and breathed in the comfort of his presence. The storm of your anxiety slowly ebbed away.

In that moment, Bucky made a silent vow to cherish every moment with you, to protect you at all costs, and to never take your love for granted. And as he held you close, he silently prayed that your gut feeling was nothing more than a passing fear, a shadow in the night soon to be dispelled by the light of dawn.

#bucky barnes x reader fluff #soft!bucky barnes #bucky x reader #bucky x you #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes #soft bucky #bucky x y/n #james buchanan barnes #the avengers #avenger reader #avenger!reader #marvel #marvel bucky barnes #marvel fluff

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cheegu3 · 7 months

Text

Enhypen - the glory (part 9)

summary; after rejecting one of the most popular boys at your new school, you soon realised that you'd done the gravest mistake of your life; these weren't ordinary boys, and now they were set on making your life a living hell - heavily based on the kdrama with the same name

warnings; yandere themes, sexual joke,

genre; yandere

wc; 4.9k

pairing; enha x f.m reader

note; sorry for the wait again, I have the ending planned so I’m thinking around 2-3 or 3-4 more chapters which will be a bit more lengthy - as always thank u for ur support and love <333 love uuu

masterlist

It was like time stopped. You and Soobin both grew pale, mouths hanging open in pure shock. It was hard to wrap your head around what he had actually said.

Jungwon, a murderer? Sure, he was cold, sadistic, and harsh, but - a murderer? He must’ve been a child when that happened. Without meaning to, your thoughts showed through a scowl on your face, causing Yeonjun to shoot daggers at you.

‘’ You don’t believe me? ‘’

You felt torn. Wanting to say yes but not feeling it to be true 100% yet. The logical side of your brain was screaming at you to find proof of it; maybe he thought wrong, maybe he had a personal vendetta against him that wasn’t at all connected to Jungwon murdering his friend.

When looking at Soobin, you realized he felt the same thing as you. Neither of you had met a murderer or witnessed a murder. It felt a bit too crazy for your small world. Yeonjun must’ve noticed you looking at his brother as his eyes shifted to him now as well. He probably saw the same expression on your face mirrored on Soobin’s face because he backed away looking even more offended and hurt than before.

‘’ Not even you believe me? ‘’

Soobin struggled to get his words out, ‘’ No, we- we believe you- ‘’ Yeonjun turned on his heel, catching him off guard. ‘’ Wait! ‘’

He didn’t turn back to him, he just walked out of the alley. The last thing Soobin managed to shout at him before he disappeared around the corner of the building was, ‘’ It’s just a lot to take in, ‘’ earning a tired scoff from Yeonjun.

When it was just the two of you, silence fell over you like a veil. It was obvious that you both were deep in thought and troubled over the same thing. Minutes passed, during which you spent going back and forth inside your head.

You remembered the coldness you felt, the silent fear the others seemed to have of him, and the sadistic smirks he’d wear on his face when he was torturing you. But, most notably were his eyes. Sharp, at times carrying many different emotions; most commonly, however, rage and emptiness. Amusement in pain but unfazed in happiness.

If anyone out of the group was capable of murder it would be him, that much you knew. So maybe it was true after all no matter how hard it was to digest. You started to feel some guilt due to how it came off to Yeonjun, so you hurried to say something.

‘’ What do we do now? ‘’

‘’ You believe him, right? ‘’

You took some time to answer which made Soobin smile knowingly. It seemed that over the last few seconds, he too had snapped out of the trance; he looked a lot more confident, no longer pondering distraughtly.

‘’ We could just double-check they went to the same school before. ‘’

Soobin agreed, sending Yeonjun a quick text. A weird feeling washed over you while you were standing there and looking over his shoulder. Your skin felt like it was crawling, and the hairs on your neck raised.

‘’ Soobin? ‘’ your voice came out in a terrified whisper making his eyes widen.

‘’ What’s wrong? ‘’

‘’ Is someone watching us? ‘’

Surprise replaced his worried expression, ‘’ What do you mean? ‘’

When a few seconds had passed and he could tell you were still serious, he chivalrously was the one who dared to look around despite his heart beating faster in dread. You noticed his head had stopped turning, and you allowed your eyes to follow where he was looking; it was the staircase.

Jungwon was staring right at Soobin, gaze diverting to you when he noticed you were looking too. A small smile tugged at his lips, and then he walked out of your sight causing both you and Soobin to scramble to look around the wall - but, nothing. He had disappeared similarly to Yeonjun, leaving you and Soobin feeling just as puzzled.

*******

You decided to go home, feeling like you needed some space to think about your next course of action, as well as what to say to Yeonjun. Soobin had expressed concerns of him acting out impulsively, blinded by rage since he had finally found the person he’d been looking for, for years.

He said he would go check on his older brother and send you updates. Without Yeonjun, the plan would probably be paused for some time until he felt a bit better or you and Soobin came up with a plan on your own. Thankfully the small break gave you some room to relax for the first time in a long time.

Your dad barely reacted when you came home. He hadn’t even sent a text asking what time you would be there after school. His eyes were glued to the bright screen in the darkness like usual, giving a short ‘ hey ‘ when he heard your movements.

You didn’t respond, unsure if he would even notice if you did or not. But he did and it caused his tired head to look up, a sad expression forming on his face as he realized he had once again lost track of time.

The door to your bedroom was slammed unintentionally due to your pent-up anger and frustrations from the long day. You laid down, muscles relaxing under the softness of the bed.

After barely a few minutes of serene quietness, the phone started ringing loudly. You groaned, rolled over, and then picked it up.

‘’ Soobin? ‘’

‘’ Hey, did I disturb you? ‘’

‘’ It’s okay, what’s up? ‘’

‘’ Yeonjun won’t come out of his room so I’m not really sure what to do. He didn’t respond to me either, except for sliding a photo under the door. Y/n…he really went to the same school as Jungwon. It was a class photo. ‘’

You hummed, ‘’ I thought so. If he transferred schools years before I got there, it would’ve been impossible for me to have known that. ‘’

‘’ Yeah, I guess that’s true. ‘’

‘’ Anything else? ‘’

‘’ He sent me some of the files and it has a lot of evidence on it. Mostly texts between employees, there are about a thousand more he has to go through. Some had videos and photos though, of employees being beaten by the boss and higher-ups of the company.‘’

‘’ Holy shit, ‘’ you bit your lip to stop your volume from getting too loud in a moment of excitement, ‘’ Do you think this is enough? ‘’

‘’ Maybe. But we never know what kind of lawyers they have. They could claim it’s A.I or deepfake and not real at all. ‘’

‘’ As long as we try it’s okay. Then we know we have tried everything.‘’

‘’ Of course. You might find some things at Jay’s house too. ‘’

‘’ Jay’s house? ‘’ your forehead furrowed in confusion, you didn’t remember him mentioning anything about that before.

‘’ I have a…spontaneous plan. Wanna come over? ‘’

*******

‘’ It’s a long shot, ‘’ you hesitantly said.

‘’ Better to try than not trying at all. ‘’

A small smile shot to your lips, ‘’ Wow, look at you becoming so wise.‘’

He blushed and whined at the teasing, hiding his face in his hands which made him look adorable in your eyes; a small laugh slipped out of you. He waved with one hand, gesturing to the phone.

‘’ Okay, okay I will text him. ‘’

5:36 pm

You: Hey, can I come over?

You and Soobin both looked at each other after you sent the first text, thinking of the same thing - it was too vague and might make him text the other guys immediately. Soobin hurried to take the phone from you, becoming serious again.

You: I feel more comfortable around you than the others, they’re a lot meaner, I think you’re a bit nicer to me :)

‘’ Is that good enough? ‘’

‘’ If he’s selfish and I guess…horny? ‘’

You gasped, ‘’ Soobin! ‘’

‘’ What? He’s a guy after all…’’ he trailed off, quickly speeding up when his ears started to turn red this time. ‘’ He’d probably happily take the chance to be alone with you. Especially given how strict Jungwon seems to be with them. ‘’

You nodded. That seemed pretty plausible. If Jungwon was always adamant they never met up or acted alone with you in fear of the group collapsing due to jealousy and conflict, that was a very smart way to make sure just that would happen.

Everyone is more vulnerable alone after all.

5:37 pm

Jay: Why, is something wrong?

You took the phone back but glanced at Soobin, wanting to get advice on what to write. As you started typing, he looked at you reassuringly so you sent it.

You: I just feel really sad and depressed, my mom has been in the hospital for so long. I don’t know what to do. Maybe I need to vent a bit. I know it’s stupid, but I really don’t have anyone else. Is it okay if I come over?

‘’ If he says yes to that, then he’s a lot more stupid than I thought. ‘’

Soobin smiled somberly to himself, ‘’ Or he’s just a man who is in love. ‘’

You shook your body jokingly as if you felt a physical sensation like goosebumps at that thought.

‘’ I get that. ‘’

‘’ You do? ‘’

He nodded and his mouth opened but then closed again as he wasn’t sure what to say. Now it was your turn for your face to heat up, you cleared your throat and turned your head discreetly away from him. Soobin didn’t notice, he was too busy beating himself up over not being able to say what he wanted to.

Jay: Okay, you can come over for a bit. I’ll send you my address.

‘’ Yes! ‘’ you threw up a balled fist and cheered victoriously.

‘’ It worked? ‘’

‘’ Yeah, thank god. I don’t know how else we would’ve gotten the proof. ‘’

Soobin chuckled, ‘’ Well you’re not sure if you are going to get that far yet. Don’t get ahead of yourself. ‘’

‘’ Oh, right. Well, I feel optimistic though. ‘’

When you looked at him for a long time in silence with a smile, he raised his eyebrows playfully, ‘’ Because of me? ‘’

‘’ Yeah, you just never seem to give up on me. Because of you being around, I know I won’t lose myself. ‘’

‘’ So you trust me again, fully? ‘’

You nodded without hesitation.

‘’ You know this. I don’t think you could make me change my mind again. You have proved yourself and helped me many, many times. ‘’

A genuine grin flashed across his face, ‘’ You better get going then, we have a plan to follow.‘’

*******

On the way to Jay’s house, something unexpected happened. The taxi driver let you off somewhere near Jungwon’s house, telling you he wasn’t allowed to go further up the hill due to the status of the man living there.

When you started walking the long and tiresome walk up - as you passed by the familiar mansion a girl kicked the door open and began coming towards you. You were about to start running in fear until you saw that it was Yena.

‘’ Yena? ‘’

You went up to the iron bars and tried tugging on the gate, but it was locked.

‘’ I can’t get out. They’ve locked me in here. ‘’

‘’ What? Why would they do that? ‘’

She hesitated for a moment, turning her head back a few times to make sure no one had followed her out there.

‘’ They found out I’m helping you. ‘’

‘’ I’ll get you out! ‘’

‘’ If Jungwon sees you here he might take the opportunity to lock you in here too. ‘’

You listened to what she said and decided texting Soobin to help might be the smartest plan of action here. Jay was already waiting for you to come to his house and might get suspicious if it took you too long.

While taking out the phone and sending a text to Soobin, Yena watched you in silence. Unknown to you, she was having an internal conflict about whether to tell you the full truth or not. She wasn’t sure how to tell you in a way that would make you give the reaction she wanted - because even if she said it as well as she could, there was still no way to tell how you would react.

All she knew was that she couldn’t stand another minute inside that place. The horror-like images flashed inside her head, causing her to feel stress flare up.

‘’ I’ll be back soon, I promise. I’m going to Jay’s house but it won’t be for long. Soobin’s picking me up and then we can all leave, ‘’ you started backing away from the fence, just as a text from Jay came through asking where you were.

‘’ No! Please, you can’t leave me here! ‘’ she wailed.

The sudden switch made you confused. She had been pretty okay just a moment before.

‘’ Yena, what’s going on? ‘’

She didn’t answer, it instead made her more hysteric. Her eyes widened, to the point you could see much of the whites in them; but in her panicked state there was still begging there, desperation and fear.

The phone you were holding started ringing, and like Yena you felt panicked. In a moment, you made up your mind to leave, otherwise, it could worsen the situation for the both of you - you’d come back later for her, you promised her after all.

You answered the phone, ‘’ Yes. I’m just walking up the hill, ‘’ and turned your back on her.

Yena screamed louder, with all of the energy she had left in her. The pain in her voice sounded so raw, it forced you to close your eyes so you could gather yourself. You knew that she was just acting that way because she was scared, she wasn’t being very rational. It didn’t matter if you saved her then or came back a little later. You doubted they would kill her in that short time span, or hurt her very badly too.

‘’ Please…’’ her voice trailed off, the sobs turning into hiccups.

You turned, feeling too bad to leave her there now. But you ended up turning back almost as quickly again and ran up the hill. Yena’s crying had made someone come out of the front door and they were approaching the gate with hasty steps.

‘’ I’ll be back, ‘’ you shouted over your shoulder.

With great determination, you made it up the steep hill after running and found yourself outside the gates of the largest house you had ever seen. It was the house furthest away from the others and at the very top.

Although Jungwon’s house was big, it was nothing in comparison to this, a house fit for a mayor and businessman. You felt slightly intimidated by its size, even more so when spotting all the guards both on the other side of the gate and outside it.

The ones closest started moving towards you. You were scared that Jay hadn’t told them you were coming so they’d arrest you, labeling you as some crazy fan or weird journalist. But when they stood right in front of you, they stopped.

‘’ Miss, y/n? ‘’

‘’ Yes, ‘’ you hesitantly said.

He said something through the in-ear he had in before he and the others walked behind you. The gates opened, not even a single squeak from them.

You looked back since you felt a bit awkward and the guards gestured for you to go in so while starting to walk, you took the time to look at everything. It was embarrassing to admit you were in awe, and when small gasps left your mouth you prayed that Jay wasn’t close enough to witness your childlike fascination at a rich person’s house. If he did, he would definitely tease you for it.

‘’ Y/n, ‘’ you tensed up.

Looking around, you quickly noticed he was standing on the balcony right above where you were. When your eyes met, he smiled and then disappeared, appearing through the French doors below in under a minute.

‘’ You can leave us, ‘’ he said to the guards who looked hesitant before eventually retreating somewhere behind you.

‘’ Let’s go, ‘’ Jay said.

He didn’t wait for you to follow him, so you had to hurry to keep up to not get lost in the big house. You went up the same staircase he had likely come down from, but didn’t go into the same room. He kept walking down the corridor all the way to the end where a big round room was.

‘’ Is this your room? ‘’

‘’ Yeah. Do you like it? ‘’

It was a big room with round windows on the wall furthest away facing the courtyard you had seen when coming in through the gates. A big bed was in the middle and the room was very clean, you could tell almost immediately that a wealthy person lived there.

He laid down on the bed, propping his chin up with his outstretched arm, and watched you as you walked around the room. You had no idea how you’d play this off, it was decided on short notice because Soobin believed you should still continue acting quickly despite missing Yeonjun by your side.

He reasoned that they seemed to have put their guard down around you, which is something you have told him before as well. So if you were to get caught, maybe it wouldn’t be as bad as it would’ve been a few weeks or months ago.

You almost slipped up when Jay moved and tapped the bed, gesturing for you to come over. You were very close to forgetting the reason you told him you were there and cursing at him. Thankfully you caught yourself just in time, but walking over to him still took some force.

You had to turn your head when you felt him moving around you so you two were spooning, not wanting to risk any true feelings appearing on your face and be visible to him.

‘’ How are you doing? ‘’

He didn’t sound as soft, gentle, or empathetic as someone like Sunoo or even Jake would’ve, so you weren’t sure why he had agreed to do this. He wasn’t the most affectionate out of the group, or the kindest - but didn’t react when you had called him that in your text?

‘’ A bit better now. ‘’

‘’ You couldn’t call Soobin? ‘’

Jay chuckled when he felt your body stiffen.

‘’ All I meant is that you’re- what do I call you…friends? ‘’

You gulped down the weird anxiety you suddenly got from being asked about Soobin. Hoping he wasn’t angry, you quietly responded, ‘’ Yeah, friends. ‘’

His body vibrated as a low hum sounded from his throat. He didn’t sound very convinced. You wondered why he brought him up at all.

‘’ Thank you for doing this, I needed it, ‘’ you attempted to shift the conversation in another direction.

‘’ Always happy to, ‘’ he ominously mumbled into the crook of your neck.

You were pressed closer to him, and he sighed contentedly as his eyelids were getting heavier just by you being close. You noticed this by the way he slowly relaxed, his head drooping into your hair.

Carefully you slid out of his hold, thinking it was a lot easier than what you had expected. Originally you were just going to say you had to go to the bathroom, but now - if he didn’t wake up, he maybe wouldn’t even have noticed you were gone at all.

It took a great deal of concentration to tiptoe soundlessly over the floor and then close the door behind you. Being so scared that it would make a noise, you opted for leaving it half-open before continuing down the hallway.

It was deadly quiet, amplifying your heart beating wildly. When you peeked around the corner and didn’t see anyone you continued tiptoeing to the closest door, it was a bedroom so you closed it again. Turning around and seeing about a dozen identical rooms you decided none of them were likely to be an office.

So you were forced to leave the corridor of safety where you knew no danger was lurking; instead walking down the stairs while crouched so you could make sure no guards were watching.

Then you sprinted towards the other side where a small corridor led into a large kitchen. No one was there either, you suspected it was because the dad was in the city and the mom was probably out working too. Or rather, you hoped that was the case as you ventured through the kitchen.

You made it safely through that too, finding yourself in the living room now, a very open space with many windows facing the courtyard. Not wanting to risk getting caught you kept walking. Most of the guards were stationed by the gate as they had been before, but some stood near the doors with their backs turned. Any unusual movements or noises and you could bet their necks would be snapping around.

Because of that, you would hide at the slightest of indicator that one of them might look into the house. First, you hid behind the walls, but the closer you got to a large room that had an unusual door behind it, the fewer places you had to hide.

The door you had seen that caught your attention from far away, was a large oak door with some letters engraved on it. A small round staircase led up to it, making it stand out clearly against everything else around.

It was deserted around the door too, but you felt scared that there was a small possibility the mayor was inside. Maybe he hadn’t gone to his office in the city on this particular day. If you knew your luck, that would be the case.

Step by step you made your way there anyway since you had made it thus far. When you stood right outside, you took a quick look around again before pressing the door handle down and going inside. Darkness surrounded you immediately.

You let your fingers trace the wall for a light switch but decided not to press it, in fear of it alerting anyone to your position. Your phone was taken out instead, the light from it only making the atmosphere creepier than it already was.

Bookshelves seemed to cover almost every single space the light shone on. It made you a little overwhelmed. The smartest move would probably be to check the desk. Nearing it, you realized there was a chance it was locked.

Just like you thought; the drawers at the old Victorian desk at the front had keyholes in them and they remained closed when you tried tugging on them.

When you gave up on the locked drawers, you instead walked to the bookshelves that were the closest; and you swear your heart stopped. The sound of footsteps just outside the door made you freeze in place, unable to move any limbs.

As the door swung open you were found like that. Cursing yourself for not snapping out of it and hiding in time, you tried to crawl under the desk even though it was way too late. You squinted, taking some time to get used to the bright lighting shining into the room.

‘’ What are you doing? ‘’

A chill ran down your spine at the sound of the familiar voice. Footsteps started again and stopped right at the desk. The shoes of Jay came into your view. He crouched down slowly and sighed, tilting his head and making you feel embarrassed - he was kind of looking at you like a disappointed father who had discovered you playing where you weren’t supposed to.

His hand caressed your cheek, he could tell you had started trembling out of fear of what he might do to you. Perfectly calm, he very smoothly pulled on your leg and managed to drag you out almost entirely from under the desk.

‘’ Get up. ‘’

‘’ W-where are you taking me? ‘’ you said, licking your dry and bloody lips.

Jay ticked his tongue and lowered his head, looking up at you through his bangs. You could tell his patience which had been there just a few seconds ago was running out by his narrowed eyes glaring up at you, so you scrambled to your feet.

You watched curiously as he went to the bookshelf and unlocked the compartment at the bottom that you hadn’t even noticed. He had a few folders in his hands when he faced you again.

‘’ Were you looking for these? ‘’

‘’ I- no. ‘’

An amused smile ghosted over his lips, ‘’ I think you were. ‘’

‘’ No, ‘’ you mumbled.

‘’ Do you want it? ‘’

‘’ No. ‘’

‘’ No? ‘’ he raised one of his eyebrows, ‘’ You can have it, all yours. ‘’

You stared at him in bewilderment. What was he talking about? Was he just trying to taunt you? The failed attempt being thrown in your face was incredibly uncomfortable, you twisted in your spot on the floor, avoiding his hawk-like eyes watching your every move - predicting your next move and relishing in your pain.

‘’ Why? ‘’ your genuinely shocked voice finally made him give into the smile that had wanted to spread for a long time. He was always right.

‘’ I’m just being nice. ‘’

‘’ No catch? ‘’

He nodded, pursing his lips.

‘’ No catch. ‘’

‘’ Liar, there’s always a catch. ‘’

‘’ Are you going to take it or not? ‘’

‘’ I don’t even know what it is, ‘’ you finally realized.

‘’ Everything you need is in there. ‘’

‘’ So why are you giving it to me? ‘’

‘’ Because no matter how hard you try, ‘’ his smile turned sinister, ‘’ you will never be able to do anything with it. ‘’

*******

6:15 pm

You: Soobin, I have the files. Please come pick me up.

Cousin: okay

Cousin: I’ll be there soon, stand in a place where they can’t see you

You did as you were told, pushing back into the big bushes that covered the hill up to Jay’s house. It was uncomfortable; not only itchy, but the branches were spiky and would be sure to leave traces behind afterward given that they were digging into your skin.

Jungwon’s house was near, you could see the gates if you turned your head. You did so out of curiosity in your boredom and restlessness of waiting for Soobin to come. Despite being meters away from the main gate you could still spot a phone lying in the grass. Yena was nowhere to be seen.

You weren’t sure why, but you felt like something was wrong. They could’ve done something to her if they had spotted her talking to you outside, even if you were almost certain not enough time would pass for that to happen. You bit your lip anxiously while you raked your brain on what to do - go over there and investigate or stay in the bush and wait for Soobin?

Soobin’s car came into view just as you had made a run for the gate, leaving your poor classmate looking back at you confusedly. He thought you were being chased, so in a moment of panic, he reversed to the gate and rolled down the window.

‘’ Y/n! Get in! ‘’

‘’ Hold on, ‘’ you said back, not ready to give up and go since you had gone through the trouble of fitting your hand through the bars now.

‘’ Oh, ‘’ he mumbled to himself, scratching the back of his neck.

You pushed your whole face against the bars and tried your hardest to reach the phone with your fingertips. When Soobin saw you struggling he came out of the car and tried as well. His arm was thicker but way longer; somehow he managed to squeeze through and just by a millimeter his fingers carefully nudged the phone closer.

You helped him pull out his arm which was red with marks, ‘’ We have to leave now. ‘’

One look at the phone was all you needed to know it wasn’t a good idea to stay there any longer. The longer you stayed, the higher the chances of them spotting you were.

‘’ What did you see? ‘’ Soobin asked in the car.

You cleared your throat, feeling a lump forming. It had been confusing, making you end up with more questions than answers.

‘’ It was a screenshot of a text between Sunghoon and Yena. ‘’

That piqued Soobin’s interest, he almost turned his whole head away from the steering wheel.

‘’ What? ‘’

You let out an exasperated sigh, looking out of the window, ‘’ It was Yena begging him to leave the group. ‘’

He couldn’t believe what you were saying, and neither could you really, ‘’ Why the hell was Yena talking to Sunghoon? ‘’

taglist; @peaceout97blog-blog, @ayadikreino, @beoms-sugar, @keikeu, @sunghoonnsupremacy, @lilyalone, @sweet-kisses-and-bloody-screams, @eunchaesmileyface, @nunugget, @seunns, @nshmrarki, @huening-ly, @espyluvsyou, @yncel, @loserwithnofriends, @enha-stan, @binchanluvrr, @ariek-divad, @obsessed1with1straykids, @yizhoutv, @taeyongzodiactwinkiri, @w3bqrl, @elleashn, @nuriicata, @yevene, @manasasugarbaby09

#enha the glory #yandere kpop #kpop yandere #yandere enha #yandere enhypen #enha x reader

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taeminsung · 1 year

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close to you..

pairing: minho x reader

summary: airports were hard for minho and so was the lack of planning for their trip to paris.

mina’s notes: this is slightly off from the ask and i took this in an extreme comfort direction. please enjoy ♡

trigger warning: anxiety

anon request: Can I request y/n taking care of Minho when he gets air sick on the plane to Paris 💌

Airports were already hard enough for Minho, but throwing you into the mix made it all the more difficult. It was the first time that you were traveling with the boys, rather than meeting them at their destination and the added level of stress for Minho was rising with each step he took. Minho didn’t mean to beg Chan to let you travel with them but he heard Paris and all logical sense went out the window, as his mind started to show images of how he could spend his down time off with you by his side exploring the city of love. If he had more time to plan, he would have found a way to make it even more special, but instead he settled on at least having the memories with you there. Currently, each step he took filled him with dread and uncertainty.

I’m going to be sick he thought, fingers stretching out to find purchase of whoever was in front of him.

Minho’s fingers tangled in the bottom of the jacket of whoever was slightly to the side of him, hoping that the feeling of someone familiar would calm his racing heart. His eyes stayed glued to the ground as he tracked the shoes of Han, making sure to not deviate too far from him. Feeling fingers wrap around his wrist, he felt the panic bubble even more in his chest as the comfort of the jacket was slowly pulled from him, daring himself to look up just a little, he noticed the familiar sweater paws you had from earlier and watched the way you intertwined his fingers with yours. With a small tug, he felt himself being pulled closer into your side at the same time he felt someone else hover close to his other side. Fear crept up his spine at the thought of someone getting not only this close to him but also to you, since he knew he probably couldn’t protect you in his current state.

It’s just Changbin on your other side, love. We have you, he heard your muffled whisper while your free hand rested on his forearm to continue to guild him.

In that moment, he feels himself relaxing just a little bit from the sound of your voice to the way you somehow knew he needed multiple points of contact in order to ground himself. A tiny muscle pulled at the corner of his lips knowing that you either silently or outwardly asked Changbin to step up to his other side as well, trying to make him feel protected in the madness that was unfolding around them. Some part of him wished that this wasn’t how he acted but some other part of him was telling him it’ll never be better. As if you could read his darkest thoughts, he felt you make quick work in releasing his hand to only have it replaced with your other hand and feel as your newly freed hand found itself on his back, rubbing small circles in comfort.

Minho wanted nothing more than to be closer to you than he currently was.

Finally, after escaping the crowds, making it through security and finding a place to sit, did Minho find himself sighing in relief. Not once did you leave his side, sometimes having to switch sides depending on where more people were walking, and always making sure that there was a member on the vacant side. He really wanted nothing more, as he sat there, than to pull you into his lap and kiss the breath out of you. It was hard for him to explain how safe you made him feel. Sitting silently, he watched as you played with his fingers and talked animatedly with Hyunjin about the museums in Paris and which ones he had to take you with on their days off. That was the other thing he found hard to explain, how you not only made him feel loved by all the little things you did for him, but also for his members. You found a way to connect with all of the members, not just because you were dating Minho but because you genuinely wanted to be friends with them, and when you found interests that you shared with them, you made that into your thing. It never bothered him to know that you were out at museums with Hyunjin or shopping with Jeongin, because he knew at the end of the day you were his and that showed in the times you brought something home for him or shared pictures of your day out with boys.

Watching you now, he really wished that he listened more to when the schedule in Paris would be so that he could have had more time to plan to ask you to be his forever. For now, he settled into the lounge chair more content with the fact you hadn’t left him side or stopped physical contact with him. Too busy in his own head, he didn’t realize that you had turned to face him, conversation with Hyunjin long over, until your reached your hand to run your fingers through your hair did he come back to reality. You ok? You hummed, nails slightly scratching his scalp, which only caused him to melt into your touch even more, eyes fluttering shut. I’m better with you around, he mused adjusting in his seat to rest his head on your shoulder.

What felt like hours seemed to pass before you were gently shaking him to wake up since the flight was boarding. Clinging to you, he couldn’t help the soft smile that formed on his lips as you indulged his clinginess by pulling him tighter to you or holding his hand a bit more firmly than usual. Quickly, he grabbed your bag placing it overhead before sneaking into the window seat, giving you puppy dog eyes as you slid into the middle seat. Glancing past you, he watched as Felix took the seat next to you, whispering something that caused his favorite sound to escape your lips. The melody of your giggle instantly calmed Minho down as he adjusted in his seat, settling in for the long flight, hoping to sleep a bit more after what felt like the longest morning ever.

As always, his dreams were filled with you.

They ranged from memories to future plans to all the small moments in between. It wasn’t until they turned from happy moments to those that weren’t his shining moments with you, the ones that he wished he could take back because of the tears that stained your cheeks. Minho’s eyes snapped open, and he gasped for air, searching for you in the dim light of the cabin. Latching onto your arm, he looked at you with panic in his heart. A million thoughts were running through his head as he felt the back of your hand connect to his forehead. Minho heard the hushed voices of you and Felix as he struggled to focus on anything other than the feeling of your hand on his head, wishing that there were more parts of you touching him. Gripping your wrist, he tugged your hand back to him as you slowly tried to pull it away. Watching as you turned to again speak with Felix before turning your attention fully back on him with a water in your free hand.

Drink, you commanded peeling his finger from your wrist and replacing it with the cold water that seemed to have appeared out of thin air.

Minho’s mind raced back to why he didn’t plan this trip out more. Maybe he could find the time to run a jewelry store with Hyunjin to find something that would be acceptable to show the love he has for you. Deep down he knew that he could probably propose with nothing, and you’d say yes, but in truth, he wanted to give you something that showed not only you but everyone around just how much he loved you. He swore, as you continued to rub his back, to give you not only the world but the entire universe. Minho loved you with his entire being and he was so incredibly thankful for you on this day.

Taking a long drink of water, he placed his forehead on the seat back in front of him, suddenly feeling like his entire world was spinning with the motion and the clouds passing by out of the window. Gulping down as much air as he could without feeling like he would throw up; he hoped that this feeling would pass quickly. Only did his body slightly relax as he felt the slight pressure of your hand resting on his back before rubbing up and down the full length, humming quietly close to his ears. Slowly, he reached out his now free hand to rest on your knee, needing the contact with you to fight off the sick feeling that was taking over his body. Faintly, Minho heard more whispers from those around him, but focused solely on your voice saying, take deep breaths love.

You. He grounded himself in your voice, in your presence, in the way that your hand moved up and down his back slightly applying pressure on the upper parts but being gentler on his lower back. You. He focused on your voice saying things to his members and probably the staff and the way you never for the second left his side. You. His rock, his person, his home. You. The person who would never judge him for his anxiety in airports or the way that he sometimes got sick on planes. You. The one who loved him so unconditionally with no fear of anything. You. His forever love that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with no matter what it took or what people said.

You are doing great, your voice broke through his thoughts, sounding closer than moments before. Carefully, he peaked up at you through his hair, seeing your smiling face caused the remaining sickness to slowly but surely melt away. Minho truly had no idea how much time had passed before he finally leaned back in his seat, not far enough for you to remove your roaming hand, but just enough to look up and see the rest of the members with concern lacing their faces. He’ll be ok, I got him, he heard you say turning back to them causing them all to go back to whatever it was they were doing before the sickness took over him. He would forever be grateful for you and the way you not only could calm him down but also his members, and somehow Chan enough to not be a fussing mom. Pulling you into his side, he took another deep breath, taking in the perfume you applied this morning and the linger scent of your shampoo.

♡ ── thank you for reading! requests are open.

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whatifyoulivelikethat · 7 months

Text

not allowed xvi | myg, jjk

pairing(s): est. poly relationship – yoongi x reader x jungkook

summary: The date of Min Yoongi's mandatory service is drawing close. It is not a solemn time, but rather a time to reflect back on how your relationship is different now. Um... other than Jeon Jungkook passed out on the couch. Ignore the snoring.

warnings: rated M (18+) for language; discussion about Yoongi's mandatory civil service; relationship talk; holy shit, they love-love each other, all the feels; no smut; idol!BTS - Yoongi x reader x Jungkook; reader is JK’s noona; based on real time

part of ‘not allowed’ series, but can be read alone. basic summary: your bf asked JK to fuck you, twice, and then on the regular. blue haired JK. 2021 YG birthday, ‘Butter’, wiyllt remix. new skill acquired, JK’s sheer pj punishment, 2021 JK birthday, during PTD in LA, 2022 HNY, 2022 YG birthday, PTD in LV, 2022 JK birthday; 2022 Christmas

“I’m going to be living like you for a while.”

“It is not as exciting as you think it is,” you had replied with a small laugh.

This.

The addition of Jeon Jungkook to the relationship between you and Min Yoongi had a comfortable rhythm. At first, there had been hesitancy. Uncertainty in defying convention, but it had felt so natural that it seemed weirder to defy the connection. A male idol having a girlfriend was already not allowed, so what was one (or) more rule(s) broken? And so, the relationship between you three was a secret from the public for reasons and a secret from most for other reasons.

All obvious, logical, unspoken.

Of course, the ones who knew the most were the other five members of BTS. For the sake of happiness, they preserved this bubble and did not interfere. Understandably, in the beginning, there had been a light discussion between all about if this was helping or hurting. They had wanted to know if anyone was overstepping bounds or if there were any ill feelings. At the end of the day, Yoongi and Jungkook did work together. But, more importantly, they were friends. The group could only work as a unit if everyone trusted each other. This was unmarked territory. Love could be messy. No one could predict the future of forever. You could only promise to be honest. Yoongi had said that he would do his best to communicate and take care of the relationships. And Jungkook, well, he was the kind of man that always had to come back to who he was, otherwise he felt lost.

Meaning…

He was alarmingly bad at hiding his attraction to you.

As proven on Run BTS!, Jeon Jungkook was a very shitty liar.

Surprising to all, the dynamic ended up having a good flow. You knew what you were getting yourself into and you knew you had to adapt to unusual circumstances, as you had been when you chose to pursue this love. As the older one, Yoongi understood Jungkook well. As the younger one, Jungkook was considerate and pure-hearted. There were no major difficulties because everyone went to great lengths to communicate and to be understanding. There was a shared belief in the power of a promise. No need for specific rules on how much time you spent with one or the other, nor any rules for how the time would be spent. With the introduction of solo activities, it became a little easier.

It was easy to love and, now, even easier to spend that precious time together.

Jungkook always told you how important you were to him. Probably because he too wanted to hear that you reciprocated the feeling, which you did and told him so. He was, as he often said, a (large and excitable and very cute) handful. He had odd hours. He was eccentric. Unpredictable. It very much depended on the day if Jeon Jungkook wanted to think very deeply about something specific… or nothing at all. Unbeknownst to ARMY, he had incorporated parts of your personality into his own. It worried you a bit, but it didn’t (did?) bother the fans when he started being a bit more devil-may-care (shirtless).

A good problem to have, one might say.

He often asked for your opinion on this or that. He had worried about being dishonest, about shying away from fans because he felt like he had to keep secrets. You told him to just act on his feelings when he missed them. Friends contact friends when they think of them. Why should ARMY be any different? You didn’t want him to and didn’t think he should stop interacting simply because he was in love. You had told him there was more to him than his relationship with you, and now he was terrorizing ARMY at midnight instead of his girlfriend (his habit of having no sleep schedule was slightly affecting your work life so you were very grateful when he made this decision). That was how Jungkook was. He wanted to know what you thought and how you thought about life. You would always answer honestly, even during times when you knew he wouldn’t like it. Sometimes he would go against your advice. He would usually come back and mumble, you were right, noona, so you never felt the need to scold or say anything more.

Stubborn ox.

Fucked like a rabbit though.

There was some truth to those chosen animal emojis, huh.

Anyway.

You realized that, because of your now relationship with Jeon Jungkook, your relationship with Min Yoongi was different now. Different in all the obvious ways, yes.

But also different in ways you nor him had predicted.

This.

After you lightly joked about him mentioning his soon-to-be-change in work life, it is not as exciting as you think it is, you had looked into Yoongi’s eyes and you knew. He, too, understood. It was a split second. The tension went over Jungkook’s head (he was also a bit too focused at laughing at Kim Taehyung’s appearance on Running Man, understandable), however, in that millisecond of shared gaze, you saw that something about your response had bothered Yoongi, something that he didn’t want to talk about in front of the maknae. Neither of you had ever agreed not to argue in front of Jungkook. Bicker, yes. The youngest found that hilarious. But a more serious discussion? It had never come up.

Until now.

And now you realized – and, by reading his expression and sudden turn of his head, Yoongi as well – that unconsciously both of you had always relied heavily on how well you knew the other, always relied on the many years before Jeon Jungkook to be the centerpiece of this relationship, always relied on an unexplainable telepathy that had developed from knowing the heart, relied so much so that neither of you wanted to show Jungkook anything but that indisputable harmony.

Was that… wrong?

It was hard to tell. There was probably no good answer. But there was that shared silence, the unspoken rule, and Jungkook fell asleep unexpectedly (expectedly?) sometime later, with a smile on his face and his arms around you. He was too heavy for you or Yoongi to carry. Well, probably too heavy for both of you combined too, but you didn’t try. Instead, Yoongi brought a blanket and you nestled Jungkook’s head on a pillow, taking care to give him good neck support and keep his now short black hair out of his closed eyes.

“He’s going to wake up sweating,” Yoongi commented with a smile, not pulling up the blanket too high.

“He should have thought about that before passing out. For someone who doesn’t wear a shirt in public, he keeps it on too often in private.”

“You know he only kept it on while we were laying on the sofa because you complained that one time about your hair sticking to his sweaty chest. Now he’s self-conscious.”

You stuck your hands on your hips. “Well, he should stop being so sweaty around me.”

“Sorry. You turn him on. He’s a hot-blooded animal.”

You rolled your eyes in mock distaste and turned to start clearing the coffee table of the wineglasses and empty snack wrappers. The television was on low, nothing but mumbling and light. Your hand reached out and long, gentle fingers rested on your knuckles.

You paused.

It was cooler now. Nearly fall. Still somewhat hot at times, but the nights were cold. The change in temperature reflected in the skin-to-skin contact. Your head turned, seeing his bare fair-skinned arm, then the sleeve of his large white Valentino t-shirt. Black pajama pants that matched the ones you were wearing, but you were in a dark grey sweatshirt with the bottom half cut off. Up to his face, framed now by his shorter black hair, a sign of what was to come, and then.

Yoongi looked back, dark brown eyes glimmering in the dark.

Lost.

When you were younger, it had been easy to fight.

You had been young, he had been young, and it was only you two. Inexperienced and experiencing everything for the first time, at least when it came to the realness of the emotions. Not yet knowing what either of you wanted from that word called love. Not yet mature but responsible enough to learn what was worth fighting over and what wasn’t. There were things worth worrying about and things not worrying about, the latter of which you and Yoongi chose to let go. It became easy once you both came to the conclusion that it was a conscious choice to address issues promptly rather than wasting time playing cat-and-mouse. When it came to Jungkook, then, you already knew how to read body language and demeanor, not to mention Yoongi had spent enough years being dragged around (literally) by the youngest to know everything about him.

It did help that Jungkook could be read like a children’s book. Again, he was not good at lying.

Now.

You looked back at Yoongi, also lost.

He lifted his hand away from yours.

For the first time in what seemed like forever, you didn’t know the right words to say or the correct way to read him. You could tell Yoongi didn’t know what to say either. It had become a habit to not speak too much about the things he or you had to do. You had static work responsibilities and Yoongi understood that. He had no set schedule, only bursts of time that were in unpredictable cycles despite trying to schedule things. You understood that. His life was a little chaotic and difficult. On some level, you enjoyed it, otherwise you wouldn’t be here. He knew that.

Or.

Did he?

His dark brown eyes shifted downwards. Then, back up, quickly, accompanied by a defeated sigh. You could see that he was telling himself to just say it because the silence was going to become unbearable.

“Are you disappointed?” Yoongi asked you softly.

“What?” Your voice was also quiet. “Why would I be disappointed? About what?”

When he had mentioned earlier that he would be living like you for a while, he had been referring to his mandatory civil service. You knew that. You also knew it was not something you got to decide, nor something he got to decide either. It was assigned. This was a known part of life for Koreans. It was something you could not change, something every able-bodied Korean man had to do, and something you did not look down on.

He was silent for a moment.

“I didn’t want to press on it,” you said, taking a step towards him so you didn’t have to raise your voice above a whisper. “I know you did your best in physical therapy and that you wanted to try and see if you could do military service since it is shorter time period.”

Those dark eyes came back to you. It was apparent that it was much easier for you and Yoongi to comfort Jungkook rather than each other. Being two people that were shown reality rather than having accessible comfort, it was always awkward at times like this. It was too late in the relationship and there was too much consideration to be angry over a misunderstanding, but now you could see why couples resorted to it rather than the discomfort of stumbling towards comprehension.

“Everything has a silver lining.” He smiled again, sheepish and not wanting to frown. “You taught me that.”

The words your ordinary and my special came to mind.

The corner of your lips ticked upward. “Yeah, you’ll be the most handsome civil service worker in all of the nation. It’s going to be so troublesome for them,” you sighed, shaking your head and waving your hand.

His fingertips touched your wrist.

You ceased all movement, gazing up at him.

Underneath wisps of black, those dark eyes searched yours.

“I thought you would be happy,” Yoongi admitted, his touch lingering. “I finally get a small taste of how you live. What hardships you have.”

A pained pause.

“At least some idea of ordinary.”

You took a moment to truly listen to what he was telling you.

Then, your fingers curled, caressing his thumb.

“Min Yoongi,” you breathed out, savoring his name with love and admiration. “I have chosen extraordinary since the day I chose to stay with your heart. I have never regretted a single day, a single hour, a single minute. Not even a second.” You shook your head again, lightly and in seriousness this time, turning your hand in his, not just holding it but believing in the precious power of a promise. “For the record, I don’t need you to experience ordinary life for me to feel like you understand my occasional work complaints. Hell, sometimes I complain just to complain,” you chuckled, squeezing his hand. “I only want you to trust my word. I don’t have the same hardships as you, yes, but I don’t need you to experience mine to for you to be empathetic towards me.”

He sighed and you looked up at him. There wasn’t exasperation. Only a wish that he said something sooner. “At times I feel so out of touch with most of the world.”

“You know that’s okay, right?” you quipped.

Dark brown orbs darted back to you, cocked eyebrow and slight frown.

Himself again.

You shrugged. “You are now a once-in-a-lifetime mega world superstar. Your talent literally cannot be contained in Korea. Didn’t your sold-out solo tour teach your that, hm?”

Gaze sharpening.

You smiled.

Yoongi narrowed his eyes. He was annoyed, but in a good way.

“You will be doing something many normal people do, but you have always done normal people things, you know,” you reminded him.

His expression softened, pensive to your words.

“You have famous friends in the industry, but you don’t make connections you don’t believe in. You help other music artists that many people know the names of, but you don’t do it with only profit and benefit in mind. While the situations are extraordinary, your actions are heartfelt, genuine, and what any ordinary person would do if they cared about them.”

There was something Yoongi always did when he was embarrassed at someone complimenting him and that was cringe and try to smile away the words like he couldn’t hear them. He wasn’t stopping you though. You tugged at his wrist and made him look at you, albeit with some shifty eyes.

“I’m sorry.” You held your joined hands between your beating hearts. “I have learned to expect the unexpected. I didn’t want to get any hopes up of maybe having aligned schedules in case they aren’t. I am not worried about the next couple years, but now I see that bothered you.”

A beat of recognition.

Soft sigh.

A half-smirk.

“It always kind of does.” Yoongi leaned down, forehead to forehead, closing his eyes. Your felt his hair against your skin, his warm breath feathering over your nose. “You are so capable and self-sufficient that I sometimes wonder if I am a selfish one.”

“Hah, how?” You tapped his own knuckles against his sternum sternly. “Are you fucking two dudes from the same group too?”

“Shut up,” he snickered, pressing his lips to your brow. Firm pressure. He clutched your hand tightly. “I know that I can’t give you normal, but it feels too strange that you don’t demand much. I know it is because you don’t want to pile on any stress, but…”

“Are you saying you want me to be a brat?”

A measured silence.

You pressed on. “Don’t you get enough of that from Jungkook?” you whispered low.

A defeated exhale. “I’m only saying I would understand if you were a little bratty.”

“Are you just saying that to get an excuse to spank me?”

“I don’t need an excuse. You’ll beg for it anyway.”

“Excuse me, I do not beg. I order youto spank me.”

“Uh huh.”

“Why are we whispering?” came the croaky, groggy voice of Jeon Jungkook.

You nearly got whiplash.

“Gah!”

“Woah!”

You and Yoongi both pulled away instantly, not really in fear of being seen but more in shock and mild embarrassment. Maybe you both had somehow forgotten Jungkook was there. He had been snoring a little after all. A pink twinge danced across Yoongi’s cheeks. You looked away quickly, and so did he, feeling the tips of your ears burn, not really sure why, and you felt your intertwined fingers begin to loosen.

Both of you froze as a large, tattooed hand slapped onto your joined hands and stopped them from untangling from each other.

Your head jerked, staring at Yoongi wide-eyed. He had a similar, confused expression, soft pink lips parted, blinking quickly. In unison, both of you turned your heads to the fluffy bedhead standing beside you. It was a narrow space between the sofa and coffee tables, so there wasn’t far to look.

Jeon Jungkook was much too sleepy to open his eyes fully.

“Hyung? Noona? What’s wrong…?”

You started a little at his naked pecs. “What the… Why are you shirtless?”

His left hand came up to scratch his head as he yawned. “I got hot, so I took it off… What were you guys talking about?”

“Never mind that, you should sleep on a bed now that you’re up,” Yoongi sighed, shaking his head. He began to pull his hand away and you followed suit, thinking it was safe, glancing at Yoongi who offered a wry smile with his eyes, this guy, and you smiled back, also amused.

Strong fingers tightened.

Three hands bound together.

“Hey.”

You paused, sensing something in Jungkook’s soft tone. Yoongi did too. No one looked at each other. Three introverts between a sofa and a coffee table, between snacks and cushions, between complicated feelings and the belief of a precious promise.

“Hyung’s right, noona.”

You felt your heartbeat slow.

He stumbled a little bit on his words but you barely noticed.

“I’ve never really said this before but… You are the best thing that happened to me besides BTS. I am so lucky to have met six really good guys who took care of me and taught me so much. I am so lucky to have fans that support our journey and music. I have people who have such great love for me that I would have never received if I was all by myself. But... I am also lucky to have someone like you who understands that love. Someone who never tries to come between it, someone who cares about that love as much as I do, someone who encourages me and stands by me even though I am a lot to handle and don’t listen sometimes.”

You couldn’t look at him. You wanted to say, ah, Jungkook, stop, don’t say this, but you felt Yoongi’s sharp gaze and his eyes told you, shut up and listen to this half-asleep man ramble. You shut your mouth but it was still way too embarrassing (not to mention staring at nakey JK was not appropriate for the serious atmosphere, time and place, time and place). His deep voice was a soft murmur, as if it saying these words suddenly like this was not planned. Probably wasn’t.

“I am so lucky to love you.”

A small sniffle.

“I am so lucky to have you too, Yoongi.”

You half-expected the older male to start sprouting you’ve grown up so much once again, but the words couldn’t come out and those cat-like, dark brown eyes were misty, listening.

Really listening.

“I was talking to Taehyungie and I… I realized…”

Jungkook’s fingers caressed your hands.

“Because of you and Yoongi, I have it easy… Everything… Everything is easy. I never feel like I don’t have your attention when I speak to you. You can always tell when I’m stressed and can get me to talk about things even though they might be silly or it’s a situation you’ve never really been in.”

“Feeling frustrated or sad about your everyday life is normal,” you quietly interjected.

You heard the gentle appreciation in his voice. “And you never made me feel like my everyday life is not normal, even though it clearly is.”

You looked up.

Jungkook was staring at all three hands. His eyes were heavy with drowsiness and perhaps something else. A heaviness of words unsaid, maybe, or maybe he was just honest and the thought popped into his head right now.

“Well, I do kind of, sort of, possibly, know someone already who has the exact same lifestyle as you,” you lightly joked.

But.

There was a softness under those lashes and kindness that galaxy of stars in those dark brown orbs.

“I know. And I know I don’t have to explain anything. I don’t have to go through any troubles. I know I can trust you. I don’t have to worry. And that makes me lucky.”

This.

It was true that you didn’t need to hear all this to believe it was fact. You didn’t need, no. But hearing it, and then it hit you harder than ever before, the inexplicable feeling, the naturalness, and Jungkook looked up when he sensed your silence, meeting your eyes, you looking back, into big brown eyes that could be cool, could be sexy, could be endearing, could be anything, but all they said right now was, I love you.

The thought popped into your head.

Wow, he really has matured a lot.

“I’m not doing anything special, Jungkook,” you chuckled softly, about to shake your head but he caught your eye, stopping you in your action.

“You are, noona. Hyung knows, I know, and, like you say to me all the time, it is okay to be a little selfish sometimes.”

“I…”

But you couldn’t look at him anymore, feeling your cheeks flush and your hold tighten, placing your left hand over theirs and pulling your body closer to them. You didn’t have any particular selfishness, really. Truly, what more did you need than Min Yoongi and Jeon Jungkook trying their best? You didn’t need any grand actions. You only needed to know their hearts were in it. They always were, no matter what, always meaning well, and this small bubble was enough, this contentment was enough, but also you realized that maybe, maybe once in a while.

Maybe it was nice to hear that acknowledgement.

“I only want you both to be yourselves. I don’t want your happiness to be taken away because of numbers, because of what people say, because of unnecessary expectations. That is all I ask for,” you murmured, blinking quickly and taking a slow breath. “I am a simple person deep down. I don’t want to be a burden. There are still so many amazing things you two can do and I don’t want to be the one to hold you back–”

You felt Jungkook’s hand leave yours and Yoongi’s.

Suddenly, strong fingers plonked onto the crown of your head and yanked your head back to face two rather vexed expressions.

“Noona, not trying to be rude, but are you actually listening to anything I’m saying?” Jungkook grumped.

You fixated on his two lip rings and the bouncing mole underneath that frown.

“What?”

Yoongi’s hand also left yours and landed on your shoulder. “We appreciate you. We love you. You are not a burden. No one is questioning your intentions. Please, if you want something that we can give, say it and let us do it for you. A little lost sleep, a little inconvenience is nothing.” He sighed with slight exasperation. “There are things we can do, or can try to brainstorm alternatives, even if you think it’s a little unreasonable.”

“Also, why aren’t you looking at me?” snapped the younger male impatiently.

“Uh.”

“It is not like you haven’t seen Jungkook naked. In fact, I think the whole world has seen him naked.”

“Hey!”

You cleared your throat. “I have absolutely zero problem with a missing shirt,” you corrected firmly, still avoiding anyone’s eyes and (more importantly) chest. “I… I have simply realized this conversation is quite serious and I am trying not to get distracted by anyone’s nip–face.”

A light pat on your shoulder.

“Is communication turning you on?”

“Min Yoongi, I will bite you.”

“I like it when you’re feisty. It’s hot.”

You jerked your head around and poked him in the chest roughly, which did nothing to stop that signature smirking face.

“Noona, it’s been a while since you bit m–”

“Don’t say anything,” you cut him off, snapping your wrist to also (sternly?) prod Jungkook in the (naked) chest. “You are the most trouble–”

The younger male grinned, playful and devilish.

You completely forgot Korean all of a sudden.

Jungkook patted you on the head.

Infuriating.

“You’re so cute, noona.”

You swiped at him, gripping his forearm and growling. “I’ll show you cute–!”

Smooth like butter (like a criminal undercover), Jungkook bent his elbow, devious smirk widening, yanking your hold and your stubborn ass forward before you could realize your mistake, gasping as you felt the hard muscle and graceful simplicity of the movement. Suddenly you were right in front of his face, chest-to-chest, to a brilliant smile and a large nose poking the top of your cheek, playful laughter and his other arm around your waist, pulling you closer.

This idiot was flexing his tattooed bicep right next to your dropped jaw too.

“Whatchu think? I’ve been trying to work out still but I’ve been eating a little too well lately.”

You grasped his forearm tighter.

Not helpful (but also helpful).

“Be quiet,” you managed to squeak out, jumping as you felt hands on your shoulders and a low, husky voice chuckle next to your ear.

“Discipline him.”

Not your boyfriends ganging up on you and preying on your kinks to…

Oh.

You relaxed.

Ah.

Raised your head.

Jungkook gazed back at you, smiling wide, expressive big peepers telling you all you needed to know.

You’re equal, noona. You always have been.

It still wasn’t the easy to say, but it got easier every time because every time you were more and more sure of how much you meant it.

“I love you.”

He said it back, your eyes sparkling in his. You turned your head and said it again. Hundreds of times, thousands of times, millions, didn’t matter, Yoongi said it back, a small kiss to your hair, murmuring, comfortable against you, and you faced Jungkook again, sharpening your tone to seducing sternness, hm, Jeon Jungkook, you really think you know who you’re dealing with, a promise of precious love expressed in (right) body and (right) mind because it was important to say but also to do. Important to feel but also express. Important to be selfless but too much selflessness was also selfish in a way when someone only wanted to feel a little needed now and then, even in a small way, in held hands and lips-to-lips and skin-to-skin.

Yes, the next few years would be different.

They would also be interesting.

You looked forward to them because you trusted them and you trusted yourself. There was always a silver lining. Every day was a new adventure. There was no need to be afraid. After all, one stopped living life once they became afraid.

You wanted to be present.

Every hour, every minute, every second.

The last moments came and they ended with a laugh.

"Don't get sick."

His small, teasing smile said, who are you, my mom?

"Do your best."

The playful eye shift said, eh, I'll think about it.

You smiled back. A slow breath. Your fingertips lingering, sensations of adoration, a million words exchanged between your gazes. Min Yoongi reached up and closed his hand around yours, holding it lightly. There was a lot being said. A lot of memories made and to be made. A lot of future to look forward to. Conversations in the quiet breathing and in the rhythmic pulse of your joined touch. Hands that told stories.

"I can't tell you how much I love you," you chuckled softly. "That would be really embarrassing."

A good-natured smile that hid a laugh. "Yeah? I couldn’t tell you how much I love you either. And, anyway, there's plenty of time. Years and years to elaborate."

A precious promise.

"Yeah. There's plenty of time," you quietly echoed.

A stillness.

This entire exchange didn't last that long to the outside world, but there was forever in his eyes.

Yoongi smirked. Time to get a move on. "Don't get into too much trouble."

You grinned. Leaned in and gave him a delicate, soft kiss.

Whispered against his smile.

"I would never do anything that is not allowed."

This time Yoongi didn’t hold back and laughed.

part xvii ... relationships were not allowed.

masterpost

#yoongi x reader #bts idol au #jungkook x reader #min yoongi x reader #yoongi x you #jungkook x you #jeon jungkook x reader #jeon jungkook x you #suga x reader #jk x reader

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daffodildelight · 1 year

Text

Enemies (Part One) | Shuntarō Chishiya x Reader

Title: Enemies (Part One)

Pairing: Shuntarō Chishiya x fem!reader

Summary: You and Chishiya always had a rocky ‘friendship’ if you would even call it that. But feels get revealed under intense pressure

Themes/Warnings: fluff, guns, season 2 spoilers

Word count: 2500sh

A/N: So unedited, will deal with it later. First ever fanfic lol so please be nice, made this in under 3 hours.

You and Chishiya always had a rocky relationship, you had arrived at The Beach after him but slowly made your way up the ranks. Becoming semi-close friends with the Hatter can do that for you. Since you were making your way up the ranks you began getting close with all the high-ranking members, you got along with most of them except for Niragi and Chishiya. Niragi because he saw you as a piece of meat and you would do all your power to get away from him and Chishiya because in you’re eyes he sees you as a weak little girl.

But your relationship with Chishiya started to change leading up to the 10 of hearts games. He would start to act nicer towards you, making sure you had arrived from your game unscathed or even trying to make conversation with you. You had to admit, it was kind of nice. But you also found this rather confusing so you went to the one person who you could get answers from Hikari Kuina.

You found Kuina sitting in the main bar at the beach, wearing her signature blue bathing suit while chewing on her dummy cigarette. ‘’Now look what the cat dragged in, how are you doing (Y/N)’’ she looked genuine when she says this but you can see a little glint in her eye. ‘’I know you and Chishiya have gotten closer in the past few months and I was wondering if I could ask a question?’’ You tried to sound as neutral as possible but Kuina could always see right through you. ‘’Let me guess, it has to do with our mutual friend Chishiya?’’ she smirked, always right on target.

‘’Yeah, why has he been checking up on me lately? It’s getting kind of weird because it’s not in his personality. Is he trying to use my connection with Hatter to get something? I mean it’s the only logical reason’’ Kuina laughed at your comment. ‘’Only logical reason! I’ll tell you this right now but you can’t repeat this to anyone, he totally has the hots for you.’’ Now it’s you bursting into laughter. ‘’Very funny Kuina, tell me the real reason why.’’. Kuina looks stunned ‘’You know I would never lie to you (Y/N)’’. Giving up on your line of question you left with a ‘’yeah whatever.’’

A few days passed, and tensions are rising within The Beach, you can feel it. Ever since Aguni has taken over from the sidelines things are going from bad to worse. Chishiya seems more in his head than usual. You were hanging out in the bar when suddenly the P.A. went off. ‘’We would like to take this opportunity to sincerely thank you for staying at Seaside Paradise, Tokyo…’’ A man with a calming voice spoke on the P.A. Everyone at the bar looked around confused as were you, then the man continues ‘’As a token of our appreciation, we will now commence a game with all 59 participants in the venue…’’ All the TV’s around the room flash with one image which gains everyone's interest. The 10 of Hearts. The Beach is a venue and it’s a 10 of hearts game? You were not looking forward to this. ‘’All participants must assemble in the lobby immediately. The rules of the game will be explained.’’ There was a feeling in your stomach that this game was gonna cause massive problems. So you and everyone else in the bar migrated into the lobby and grabbed one of the many phones on the table to register for the game.

While waiting for all the players to arrive you make eye contact with Chishiya from across the room, none of you pulls away and it was probably the first time you never felt a dislike towards him, instead it was something much different. My focus was pulled away when someone yells ‘’Momoka!’’ and there she was living lifeless on the floor with her orange and white striped bikini knife stabbed into her heart. Being a part of the games you had seen lots of death but watching it be someone who lives in the house as you and has been helping you since you arrived sets a horrible gut feeling within you. A ding rings from the phone in your hands which now gains your attention. ‘’Game, witch hunt. The murderous witch who killed this girl is hiding amongst you in plain sight. The witch role is not limited to women. To clear the game you must find the witch and burn him or her in the fire of judgement. Time limit: 2 hours.’’ Massive roars were held within the lobby and you knew things were gonna go south within seconds. As you were trying to think of a plan to do anything Chishiya carefully grabs you by the arm and walks you away from the group in the lobby without raising any suspicion. He leads you through multiple corridors and rooms before placing you in a wardrobe. ‘’Things are going to turn into shit (Y/N), stay in here and don’t the door open for anyone except me, I’ll get you when this is finished.’’ Chishiya gets up to close the door before you ask: ‘’Why are you doing this? How do you know I’m not the witch?’’.Chishiya looks at you carefully. ‘’Because I need to know that your gonna be safe, and I know your not the witch because your not the type to kill a person (Y/N).’’ He then leaves through the door and you stay in the closet. After around 10 minutes you believe this to be a good idea because you can lot of screaming and multiple gunshots.

After what seems like an hour and a half sitting in a closet listening to screams Chishiya opens the door and pulls you out of the closet. The hallways were full of smoke and dead bodies on the floor. Chishiya takes you to Kuina and you guys make your way to god knows where. ‘’Will someone please tell me what's happening? Who’s the witch? Where’s Hatter and Aguni? Where are we even going?’’ you groaned loudly while walking barefoot into the city. ‘’Everything will be explained to you soonly (Y/N)’’.

You make your way through some ground tunnels until you reach a room with loads of dead bodies and computer scenes. Then you finally explode. ‘’What the fuck is happening!? Someone explain everything to me now! I'm so confused… where are we? Where’s hatter?” Chishiya sits me down and gives it to me straight, how hatter died a few days ago and thats why aguni took over. How Asahi told everyone she was the dealer of the game, and why Momoka killed herself because she was the witch. It was very hard to listen but Chishiya sits next to me and comforts me the best way he knows how. By stroking my hair, it was really nice minus the horrible things he was telling but all that stopped when we heard footsteps coming towards the computer scenes. Arisu and Usagi walk through the darkness and Chishiya make us known to them. “So you actually found this place. I expected no less from you. Thanks to you two, I have all the numbered playing cards right here. Thank you.’’ Chishiya looks as smug as ever, you can’t help but feel a little bit more attracted to him.

Conversations were exchanged between the four of them, trying to figure out how each person got to the same place, and what even was this place. You tune yourself out of the conversation and decided to turn and sort out your conflicted feelings. Why did Chishiya save you? You don’t have anything to bring to the table, maybe a few hand-to-hand combat skills but that’s it. Why are you even having feelings for Chishiya? This was starting to get very annoying for you but your train of thought cuts out when all the screens turn on and you see Mira walk into the shot. Everyone exchanged confused glances. She goes on to explain how there are going to be new games and these games will be the ‘face’ card games. But it left all of us wondering, when will we ever get back home?

We all make our way into the centre of Tokyo trying to think about the new information Mira has given us. We look out into the streets of Tokyo and see multiple huge blimps with different kinds of face cards on them. One huge billboard with ‘Next Stage: Start’’ written on it. ‘’None of the games has started yet’’ spoke Arisu standing in the middle of the group looking so tired. ‘’Maybe we still have time’’ Usagi spoke next trying to reassure Arisu. ‘’Or they forgot to push the big red start button’’ Chishiya replied, Arisu and Usagi turned around and gave Chishiya a look, and I couldn’t help but give a chuckle. I noticed Chishiya smirk a little. ‘’They didn’t tell us about the rules for this one.’’ Signs Kuina. Everyone in the group continues to look around confused. Usagi looks like she notices something. ‘’What is it?’’ I ask with Chishiya to my right. ‘’I hear something’’ Usagi replies and looks towards the street. We all turn and watch the street with her. Multiple cars approach us, and I recognise them as Beach people. They all hop out of their cars and Arisu goes to investigate. ‘’What is this? What are you doing here?’’ He asks one of the members. The members of The Beach go on to say ‘’We saw the blimps show up, there are rumours that the next stage is starting’’. Arisu getting a little frustrated says ‘’Right… here's the thing’’ Suddenly the members of The Beach are getting shot down.

‘’A riffle, get moving,’’ Chishiya says in a weirdly calm way when people around him are dying. ‘’That thing is an anti-tank rifle. So I’d forget about hiding behind a car.’’ He tells the group. I decided to take initiative for Chishiya at this moment, I grab his arm and we follow Arisu towards some buildings. Chishiya runs ahead of me and covers me with the rifle. When the group meets behind the building Kuina asks ‘’Does this means the game started?’’ Chishiya quickly replies ‘’I don’t know’’. Kuina continues ‘’Did they give us any rules?’’ We slowly make our way around the building. ‘’Without rules this is just a massacre’’ Shouts Arisu. ‘’That rifle can kill from about a kilometre away,’’ Chishiya tells the group, he goes from covering me to holding my waist if not for the adrenaline I would assume my bodies reacting like this because of him. Different sounds now come from the gun. ‘’And now we’ve got an assault rifle.’’ Chishiya continues. We all huddle as a group and give comments about things we are witnessing and ideas on what could be happening. ‘’Maybe there are different shooters’’ Usagi speaks up, ‘’Other players are grouping up, I didn’t know there were this many players left’’ Kuina adds. ‘’There almost here!’’ Arisu shouts and backs away from the mysterious shooter. ‘’Let's go!’’ Arisu yells while taking the group back into the street. ‘’I don’t think this is a good idea Arisu!’’ I yell in hopes he can hear me but the blast from the rifle is too much. ‘’We need to split up’’ Chishiya yells and grabs me by the hand and pulls me from the group.

Chishiya and I start sprinting down the street, hands holding each other while bodies fall all around us. I trip on a rock and Chishiya is there to scoop me up from the ground and we continue running. Hands still interlocked tugging each other towards different directions. I see Kuina from a distance and drag Chishiya with me to catch up with her. Kuina looked grateful that somebody else was with her and the 3 of us crouched behind a car. Kuina looks down and see’s Chishiya and I’s hands interlocked. She gives me a knowing look and I turn around to focus on more important things like Arisu and Usagi running along the opposite side of the road trying to help somebody. I make eye contact with Arisu: ‘’Are you trying to get killed out there!’’ with that comment the gunman takes fire in our direction. I hide back behind the car. My back is up against Chishiya's torso and I can feel his breath on my neck. Kuina speaks up ‘’Where are they shooting from anyway?’’ we then hear a loud rumbling from above us and see the huge blimp with a kind of spade flag hanging below it. ‘’Huh, he must be the king of spades’’ Chishiya tells us he then turns to me. ‘’Take this it’s a good luck charm’’ He gives me a handmade explosive. ‘’Thank you Chishiya, I don’t know what to say’’ I can’t believe Chishiya would give up an explosive for me. ‘’Just use it if you have to.’’ and he gives me a smile. I turn to look away feeling a bit flustered but then I notice a man dressed in a long dark black cloak. I point towards him and direct Chishiya and Kuina towards what I’m looking at. ‘’That must be the king of spades’’ I whisper lightly. Chishiya whispers back into my ear ‘’I think your right’’ I turn around to say something but got caught looking into his eyes. My concentration on his eyes disappears when Kuina spots Arisu, Usagi and some random dead guy in the car next to us. ‘’Hey! You two okay? You hurt?’’ Kuina pipes up, and Chishiya gives them a wave. Shots continue to fire as we hide behind the car. ‘’We’re pinned down here’’ I say loud enough for us to hear. ‘’If we step out, he’ll get us!’’ Usagi replies. All of us try to figure out a plan to get out of there but nothing seems to be working out and the king of spades is getting closer. My train of thought gets broken when I green car that I’ve noticed from the beach before pulls in front of us honking its horn. ‘’Get in!’’ yells Tatta from the passenger seat. ‘’Tatta!?’’ Arisu and I yell in surprise and relief. ‘’Don’t just stand there!’’ someone yells from the driver's seat. ‘’Ann!’’ Kuina yells. Usagi and Arisu are the first to make their way to the car followed by Kuina, me and Chishiya. Ann opens the passenger seat and Arisu, Usagi and Kuina make it safely. Different story for Chishiya and me. A grenade is thrown towards the car door and Chishiya stops me from walking on it. ‘’That’s bad. Get going!’’ He yells towards Ann.

In a split-second decision, I decided to kick the grenade towards the kings of spades will Chishiya grabs my hand and tugged me the other way. ‘’(Y/N)! Chishiya!’’ I hear Kuina yell from the car. Chishiya pulls me behind a car and uses his body to shield me from the blast. At that moment I’m glad that I was stuck with Chishiya because I know that if I had to pick anyone out of the group to survive with it would be him and unfortunately for us, we won’t be seeing the group in a while.

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motherraid · 19 days

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I can’t find any rules so if your uncomfortable plz feel free to ignore this but I recently found out that when a afab person sits on someone else lap, they can feel the *throb™*

So I’m currently thinking what would Sebek do if during the Masquerade s/o fem!reader ended up sitting on his lap and he felt the throb. What would he do? Would he get hard or would he wonder what it is?

Can I be ✨🎀 anon plz? If you do those kinds of anon thingies lol

Omg of course???!?!?! It's been so long since I've taken an ask from a named anon what you're so nice 😭😭😭

AND YOU HAD TO PULL A SCENARIO FROM MY FAVORITE EVENT TOO ILY

((Grinding, manipulation/gaslighting(??), boners (lol), slight exhibitionism(?? If you squint i think) more big boy words and can't really think or anything else as a description, IM SORRYYY I NEED CHARACTER EXAGGERATION IT'S AN ADDICTION))

Well, well. Back to lap sitting. It seems you all have a certain taste.

Boring answer is he feels it, gets embarrassed, and asks you to get up before he even begins to feel anything. He'd probably offer you his seat and walk off to find another seat he can sit down in. He's red faced, but that's it.

Fun answer?

I believe that Sebek WILL know where it's coming from. I'm sure he has some knowledge in sex ed or smth and if he doesn't, he's still very smart. He can make the connection and what was causing it easily. And when he looks up at you in concealed confusion, he can tell by your nonchalant expression that you aren't doing it on purpose. He assumes it's a natural thing that you shouldn't be ashamed of. So, by that logic, if you feel something hardening under your ass, surely you can understand that it's just natural, right? It's nothing to freak out over, I mean, who wouldn't get hard when there's such a darling sitting in his lap?

And who could possibly have known that something as simple as a pulse could be so alluring?

I mean, if we're talking sweet ol classic Sebek, he'd probably be aaaaabsolutely mortified. His immediate reaction would be to politely tap you on the shoulder and ask you (in the quietest voice he's ever had in his life) to stand so he can use the restroom. He won't even make it to full erection by the time he's flown from the room lol. And as soon as he makes it into semi-privacy, you won't see him for a good while. Well, at least until he can either will his erection to die or pathetically rub one out in a restroom stall like a loser (lmao). Most likely the former. His pride wouldn't allow him to do something so humiliating. If someone heard or caught him whimpering while he spazzes with his dick in his hand mid orgasm he'd truly never show his face in public again.

If you two are in a relationship then maybe he won't be so quick to run away and pitifully consider jacking off to the feeling of you throbbing in his lap- wishing he could feel your throbbing while deliciously stretched around his dick and welcoming every inch deeper into your warm cunt until either he runs out of inches or you run out of space.

No, no. He may just steadily place both hands on each of your thighs and bury his face into the back of your shoulder. Or the crook of your neck depending on how tall you are.

("Please... Just stay here for a moment. I swear that I'll let you up soon.. But for now I need you to stay put... and try not to move too much." )

And uhm.. Mk so you know it's not a Duke post without some sort or freak in there, and I just can not write something without going feral about it and the only way I can go feral about it is if I exaggerate his character so PERVY SEBEK

So if you somehow had managed to sit down in his lap and he feels his zipper area becoming a bit uncomfortable, you'd better have a strong will. The absolute degrading filth this boy will spew into your ears will either have you grinding into his crotch and begging him for more or trying to muffle your hurt/confused sobs. Best believe he ain't going nowhere, and neither are you for your little stunt. Sure, you may not have been intentionally trying to arouse him, but you are the one who insisted on using him as a seat when there are plenty of places to rest. That must have been what you wanted, huh? To see him all red faced and bothered? You probably like seeing him breaking a sweat, lip between his teeth and digging his digits into the underside of the seat. You must loove making him horny. It's like you get a kick out of it. Is it funny for you? To see him in agony?

Well, two can play at that game. Don't even bother acting surprised when he wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you tight to his chest. He might wait for a person or two to pass out of view before his tongue sneaks a quick swipe against your earlobe. His breath is heavy on your neck while he nuzzles his face into your hair. Thank the Seven for the loud(ish) music echoing off the walls, or else anyone a good few feet from you would be able to hear him groaning in your ear. All while one of his hands slowly slides towards the inside of your thigh and gives it a good squeeze.

And don't even think about saying anything. It's all your fault, you know. You just casually decide to sit in a guys lap and act surprised when he gets hard? Just like your enticing second heartbeat, an erection is something that can not be helped sometimes. They can happen anywhere, and every guy can agree to that. So what will it look like when you purposefully sit in his lap, throbbing against his thigh with your ass sat firmly against his crotch? Did you forget you're in a school of boys? They'd understand him in a heartbeat. Some may even say you did it on purpose. You'll only embarrass yourself. So stay still, stay inconspicuous, and stay silent.

Let's be honest, though. He's hanging on by a thread. He's just so embarrassed that you've managed to get him this vulnerable and he's taking that out on you. You feel so warm and smell soo good. It's taking every ounce of restraint to hide his gasps and grunts from the spread crowd around you both. Trust they can't be concealed from you, though. You can hear everything. Not to mention feel everything. It's impossible to ignore him spreading his legs a bit and slowly rolling his hips into you.

If he's miserable and desperate, he'll make you feel even worse. Unless you'd rather sneak away and give him the blow job he deserves for putting up with you. Lend him you pussy for a while and he might even spare you a lecture about public decency once this trip is over. (How hypocritical.)

And he's lying. Of course you'll be getting properly disciplined when this is all over. A hands-on lecture is a must. Best not to worry about that now, though. Just enjoy the moment. He sure is.

("I should have known better than to humor you. To think I actually believed you might have been behaving decently for once.")

#sebek smut #sebek zigvolt smut #sebek zigvolt x reader #sebek x reader #✨️🎀 anon #I'M NOT MAIN TAGGING THIS I'M TOO EMBARRASSED #Rambles I'm too lazy to reread and edit

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astroismypassion · 1 year

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Astrology observations 🌄🌄🌄

Credit goes to @astroismypassion

🌄 Mercurial Moons, Gemini and Virgo Moons, dislike permanently taking care of someone, of others. They only love the role of a caretaker for a small period, for example if they are hosting a lunch, a dinner. But other times, they don’t want to deal with other people’s needs. They have this mindset that each person is responsible for themselves and has to cater to themselves only and not others. They are very preoccupied about their own survival, own needs and when they need something from others they already plan that in advance so that they deal with others as little as possible, because they value being self-reliant so much. Negatively, this can manifest as only wanting to hang with people when they themselves have something to say and being a bad listener. They only respond to talk more themselves and discard what you have to say. Since they come up with solutions, new perspective, ideas during hearing themselves talk at aloud with others. 😬 Sorry guys, didn’t intend to come at you like that. 😅 But recently I’ve had much more Gemini, Virgo Moons interactions that allowed me to get to understand them further. And I came to the conclusion that Mercurial Moons are really preoccupied with their own everyday survival and how they will fully make true their OWN plans at all costs.

🌄 Venus Neptune aspects and Pisces Venus people become more spiritual once they have a crush on someone or are falling in love. They could watch more tarot pick a card readings, dream about them, think about what they could be doing at the time they think of them. They also become far more intuitive. Even if usually they are so rational, logical with their decisions, once they are falling in love, they really use intuitive side to guide them through the connection.

🌄 If you have Pluto in the 1st house synastry or even Scorpio Rising/Pluto in the 1st house in the Composite chart with someone, you judged YOURSELF in front of them when you were meeting them for the first time. For example: if you met them at a party, you taught “Will they think I drank too much?”. Or if you met them in a school hallway, you could have taught “Why was I standing like that??” or even “What did I say THAT?” etc. Basically there were feelings of judgement, shame, being too self-conscious, too much in your own head/mind and was probably not as present in the moment as you would like to, you felt spaced out a bit or detached. Maybe even under some substance influence, but maybe not too much, for that Neptune would have to be involved as well. I think the other person just makes you cringe at YOURSELF a little too much.

🌄 I can’t say how many times I’ve seen Aries Ascendant in the Composite chart of people who dated purely out of physical attraction. Besides that, both people wanted their OWN needs to be met by the other person. They wanted to fulfil their own agenda through that person. Also, it gives very high school, teenage, selfish kind of romance. But not the kind of high school boy/girlfriend you end up marrying, but more like that 7-months relationship. So this reminds me of when one person really badly wants to be in a relationship or they want their first relationship to happen and other more self-focused reasons.

🌄 Similarly, I have always seen Neptune on the Ascendant, Neptune in the 1st house in Synastry, Pisces Rising in the Composite when people had first meeting at a party or a gathering, where there was drinking involved (or even other substances), so the sobriety aspect of the interaction was challenged.

🌄 However, Neptune and Uranus might have been involved on the Ascendant or in the 1st house when the first “meeting” was not in real life. You might have seen their social media profile first or your first interaction was through virtually messaging each other.

🌄 Capricorn Moon women (one celebrity example would be Kourtney Kardashian Barker) usually keep a short haircut. They could go even a step further and want to straighten their hair. So they could end up looking quite strict, detached and a bit cold/cut-throat. This to some extent rings true for Moon conjunct Saturn and Saturn in the 4th house women as well. But I noticed that they have curlier hair than Capricorn Moon women, but short as well.

🌄 Capricorn Moon women also really embrace their age. They are not scared of getting older, they more like “I just LOVE being 45!”

🌄 And they have dealt with strong emotional turmoil in one or two long relationships. They don’t even experience many heartbreaks from several short-term relationships, because they often don’t even enter that kind of relationships. So I think emotion/relationship wise, their time for fulfilling relationships is around 30-35 and then again after 45. Because usually before those ages, they most often don’t get their needs met.

🌄 Often times Pluto is involved on the Ascendant, in the 1st house in Composite/Synastry chart in romantic relationships that have ended just as quickly as they have started. HOWEVER, the only difference with Mars/Aries Ascendant when it comes to relationship being shortly lived, is that the effects, CONSEQUENCES of an ended relationship with Pluto/Scorpio Ascendant fade out veryy slowly and the relationship very slowly dies out. With Aries you just move on to greater things, with Scorpio you will probably still dwell on ended relationship, analyse reasons for going wrong, go through healing first. So even if the person is no longer actively in your life, you might still analyse every aspect of the relationship you had with them at the time. Therefore, the full dissolution of the connection is far slower.

🌄 When you have a lot of Gemini, Virgo placements in the Composite chart with someone, you end up feeling confused, drained during and after interacting with the person. Take can end up making you scatter-minded, hard to concentrate, having a lack of focus as soon as you start interacting with them. When you are on your own, you’re calm and peaceful, but when interacting with them you could end up confused, make mistakes or like you can’t express yourself clearly through words in their presence. So check this in the Composite chart. Not only Pluto, Neptune, Uranus make you confused in a connection.

🌄 Gemini Moons like to have two or three homes that they go back and forth to. They spend a few days there and go back to another home other days ideally. However, if they make a PERMANENT move to another home, to another city or even country, they have hard time adjusting to the change and end up feeling dissatisfied with staying there. They love having options at which home to stay for some time. These people also need a lot of space to move around in their home. Or it can manifest as literally wanting to have a lot of rooms, even if they mostly live in just one room. They just want to have THE OPTION of more rooms they can go to. Often I noticed Gemini Moons dream big of moving somewhere, but when they do it, they have such hard time accepting new living situation. And they end up critiquing or nit-picking their new home, living area, new neighbours etc.

🌄 Sign over the 3rd house show who you drive in your own car with you.

Aries: you like to drive by yourself, only you in the car

Taurus: you drive rich people, people you highly value and those who have have an effect on your self-worth, talents, your partner, friend

Gemini: you drive your close friends, elementary/high school friends, you go on road trips with friends to another city

Cancer: you drive your mother, sibling, your children, family members, close friends

Leo: you drive your crush, a romantic interest, someone with whom you flirt with, you drive someone who is arrogant, confident, childlike, flirty

Virgo: your co-worker, you drive your pet, your gym partner, your friends, colleagues, people you see on a daily basis at work/in your studies

Libra: you drive your wife/husband, person you are in a long-term, committed partnership with, a business partner

Scorpio: you drive with your intimate partner, someone who you share a deep trusted bond and with whom you are physically intimate with, influential people with power/wealth

Sagittarius: you pick your friend from the airport or drive them to the airport

Capricorn: you drive your parents, grandparents, could be even a boss, people who have high status in society

Aquarius: you drive acquaintances, people who share your hobby/an interest, you might not own a car, but you use car share

Pisces: you drive people to the hospital or you might not own a car lol

🌄 If you have Aquarius 12th house in the Composite chart you could still remain friendly to each other and continue to be friends even after breaking off a romantic connection.

🌄 If you have Cancer over the 8th house you are more prone to experience strong emotional turmoil after ending an intimate partnership. This could result in emotional breakdown, emotional trauma from relationship. I advise to be mindful with whom you are connecting if you have this placement in the natal chart, because you might not even be fully aware how sensitive you are and especially to people’s energies. Past person’s energy can still linger around you. Also, these people in particular I noticed, have hard time keeping a bond amicable after dating that person. They have hard time staying friends with a person they were in a partnership with. Because they emotionally connect so much with that person, that just a platonic relationship doesn’t seem sustainable for them.

🌄 If you have Mars, Saturn or Chiron in the 7th house in the Composite/Synastry chart committed partnership is more prone to not happen. I’m not saying it’s impossible though, there are always exceptions.

Credit goes to @astroismypassion

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