#and like I said i did have a job and k was so happy because it was working on comic and I was ‘oh I’m doing my dream job I’m doing it’ but I

[sualne]

been looking for jobs for three years and in the past two months ish I’ve gotten for the first time my first job interview and for a different job my first job essay.

(I did have an actual job as a comic colorist for like six months but nobody around me considered it a Real Job so I feel like I just never have a job even though I very much did.)

and each time, during the interview where I know realise I was kind of being explained the whole time why I wouldn’t get the job and at the end of the essay(which might not be the right word, like a day we’re your try out the job to see if you can do it) one of the reasons given why I wouldn’t be taken it was ‘we need people who can smile’.

(there were actual argument like being ‘too introverted’ and ‘not dynamic enough’. That last one is funny because i had another ‘almost pass out for no reasons’ moment right for break time (genuinely perfect timing) during the essay and while I was cold sweating and going blind on the bathroom floor I realised, if anyone ever know I have health issues I will never get a job. So being told I wasn’t dynamic enough a fourty something minutes later was straight up comedic).

Back to the smiling, my entire life since I was a literal baby I’ve been told I wasn’t expressing the Right Way. ‘If you feel a specific way you Have to emote this specific way, act this specific way and not do anything else otherwise you’re not actually feeling what you say you’re feeling, it means you’re actually lying, faking it or don’t know what you’re actually feeling because your not showing it the Right Way’ and obviously I’ve dismissed this my entire life because I was sure it was obvious and everyone knew that everyone exist differently and people don’t act the same. I kind of assume everyone that ever bothered me about it was some flavor of 1 having a day and decided to being weird about it to me or anyone else that was also not existing the correct way. 2 just kind of an asshole and therefor they’re opinion didn’t matter. 3 just kind of strange about thing and so be it, ´not my problem tho’ I thought.

But seeing how it’s an actual argument people have use twice now to refuse me a job I’m kind of being thinking, it might actually, for real, be a thing people actually are worried about, actually. Which is wild, but also make sense because people have very much for my whole life, to me and to a ton of strangers, made comments on folks not existing the proper way. Like how in horror someone being slightly off, slightly wrong, a little bit not how it usual should be is the trope of all time. And I love this trope, someone who’s voice is in differed from how they mouth work, someone who seems to not walk directly on the floor but just slightly above it. It’s fun and interesting.

Anyway, real life stuff, being told I’m not smiling enough is wild, like yeah I don’t smile much at all that’s a fact, and both job were about interacting with people and every time you go to a restaurant you’ll ear someone saying out of nowhere mean thing about people who work there. Insane things like ‘I don’t like the way they’re standing’ and over analysing someone expression and body languages when they’re literally just doing their job.

This post is kind of a mess but I had a point which was, I don’t understand people and why are so many mean for no reasons but I wanted it to sound less like a kid complaining and be more verbose about it.

And (this isn’t over yet) I did force myself to smile, like I very much did, I tried my best to be as pleasant and polite as possible. And being told again, this isn’t enough, just suck. Like I have to mask and hide and deal with so much I kind of expected that of all thing I was allowed to keep my face. Like people have bothered me about it my entire life and I’ve dismissed it my entire life because it just did not make sense and I couldn’t make it make sense(still can’t). But I’m genuinely at lost at what to do about it, if apparently I also have to change my face to get a job, that I need to exist the correct way in order to have the damn job in order to exist at all is all so, Not Good.

#long post #Im not proof reading this becaus I’ll miss typos either way but yeah been having a bit of a I guess more A Confusion rather than a crisis #but like. yeah. confusion yknow. sending resume all the time. rarely every getting a response and when you do it’s a automotic ‘you’re not #profile we want’ or ‘the employer has move on in the process’ of whatever. so the two time I actually got as for as actually going to #places to talk to people feels both like a huge progress and ?? adjective for what in the world can I do about all this #and like I said i did have a job and k was so happy because it was working on comic and I was ‘oh I’m doing my dream job I’m doing it’ but I #haven’t been able to find anything since. and no one think of it as an actual job and people keep treating my like an helpless child. like #I’ve been told I’m not allowed to stay home alone for a few days even though I’m 23 so I just. wtf at this point yknow. #edit: hehhhh fuck it let’s make this reblogable. his do talk deal with The Everrginf actually. I’d like to ear about it. nothing I can do #how do y’all deal with The Everything*** #but keep sending resumes and wait.

[anadiasmount]

we’re pretending? - jude bellingham x reader.

quick sum: no date to an upcoming wedding, you use your best friend as last resort. what happens when your best friend isn’t playing pretend anymore and you’re left conflicted with these unusual feelings…

wc: 4.6 k | masterlist | jude’s masterlist

psa 🗣️: i used my og ‘glory box’ fic to get some inspo while writing this fic ngl!! 😣 this was so fun to write not only by the trope but the DRAMAAAA!! like always, hope you enjoy! 🤍

“yes mom, i know. i picked my dress up yesterday, and my flight is booked as well,” you sighed and rolled your eyes knowing she wouldn’t be able to see you through the phone. she knew how important this wedding was but she kept putting the pressure on you. it was the last thing you needed especially after you told her you’d bring someone along.

that someone was now you’re ex-boyfriend. you had less than 48 hours to come up with an excuse or show up alone.

"are you still bringing your plus one?" she asked, the line going silent for a few seconds before she spoke up again. "y/n? are you there?" you should've just lied or said the truth, all you could think of was how happy and super excited she was when you told her you'd met someone and began dating.

"yes mom... we both will be there," you closed your eyes, disappointment in yourself filling the void in your head. you could hear her squeal in the background, telling a voice there with her about the good news. you chewed on your lip anxiously, wanting to cut the call or else you'd break down.

"listen mom, i have t-to go okay? ill call you tomorrow. try not to stress so much," you smiled weakly hearing an "i love you", ending the call after gifting your goodbye. there was no avoiding the mistake you had committed. you wanted to slap some common sense into yourself, because where the hell were you about to find someone?

you clearly remembered the day telling your mom you'd met someone at uni. she was over the moon and wanted to tell everyone but you dismissed the idea, not wanting to rush since you had recently met. you would call her and tell her about him, and she listened so attentively, just like in the movies.

you couldn't bring yourself to tell her when you and max had broken up. your whole life has always been surrounded by being told you needed to be more like your older sister, the pressure of being a golden child laid on you. for once you had something, but that had to get ruined as well.

the scolding, the perfect grades, friends, hell even family. you had to be so careful and live up to their expectations. you loved them, you did, but at times you just felt like moving away was the best idea. and you did just that, the first to move out to a new country, breaking records at uni, and even finding a suitable job.

your boss loved you, and coworkers admired you for the passion and dedication you carried. so why did it have to go all wrong with max? you had an image of him in your head that he was madly in love with you, though you'd later be proven wrong when you found out he was sleeping with his boss. finding them in the act on your 6th month anniversary.

you still can recall the feeling of being unable to breathe, their screams and his pleading going quiet as you could just stare into the room, not once being able to see his eyes. disgust, and rage, but mostly sadness, a heavy heart, and the lump in your throat. he hurt you terribly and you would forever resent that.

after the call, you sat quietly on the couch, hands in your hair as you thought about everything. looking around seeing your bags packed, the blue dress hanging by your room, pictures everywhere. you hated to admit but you were living in a hell, life messy and a disaster. your buzz ringed, seeing through the tiny camera your best friend jude in the frame.

you allowed him in, walking over to the large mirror and wiping away the dry tears, making yourself look more presentable. you looked worn out, eyes droopy and low, lips slightly chapped, and to make matters worse a zit on your chin. you exhaled a breath, keys jiggling as jude came in.

he set his training bag down, took his shoes off, and walked to you, giving you a small hug. "you look terrible," you gave him a warning look, "but lucky you, i brought us food," he spoke cheerfully, the mood inside you going from gloomy to content. "it's raining like crazy, i almost fell coming up. also i brought some packages and your mail," jude continued.

"thank you, i haven't had the time to go down and pick them up! i've been so busy packing and planning last-minute stuff," you groaned, going to the kitchen and washing your hands. "watch, in the next few minutes i'm going to get a call," you theorized. jude pulled out the food and served it into your plates as you grabbed a water for him and a soda for yourself.

"how was training?"

jude shrugged unimpressed, "same old. didn't really have to go in, but they needed me for a small campaign shoot, so i had no choice. also cama and tchou send their hello's."

you and jude spoke amongst yourself. just about each other's days and catching up from the last time you guys were together. you teased him about losing a bet with his little brother, jude whining about how he cheated. new music that came out, and a pop up store that opened lower in downtown.

"so what's got your head in a twist?" jude sipped on his last few ounces of water, leaning his head on his propped-up arm and hand. you awkwardly scratch the back of your neck, pick up the dirty dishes, and walk to the sink. "okay don't make fun of me-"

"you're basically asking me too... also no promises since you just made fun of me for losing against jobe," jude chuckled.

"jude."

"oh it's serious then... what did you do?" he saw the serious look on your face, a small worry constructing in his chest because he rarely saw you like this. you close your eyes, feeling the anxiety build in you once again, "i told my mom i was still bringing max..."

jude scoffed in denial, or trying to cope with the confusion, "y/n, you what?"

"i know! i know! i should've just confessed and coughed up the truth but i- i couldn't! she was so excited jude! i feel terrible for lying believe me i do, but after telling her about him and filling her with hope to break her heart, i just c-c-couldn't," you ramble, dishes clattering as you freaked out.

in your head it didn't seem as bad, but fully saying it out loud to jude, seemed even worse. jude grimaced, knowing you had messed up bad especially since the wedding was right around the corner. "i'm just embarrassed... i know they will start something and just talk down on me if i showed up alone."

jude knew how heavy-handed your family could be, often wanting to resent them because he cared for you so much. he saw how physically and mentally they could rain you even with the smallest sentence. they seemed so worried with their lives instead of the ones they should most value and care for.

jude gave you a concerned face, "what?" chuckling nervously when you gasped out, almost being able to see the lit-up light bulb on top of your head. "jude, I'm a genius!"

"well i beg to differ-"

"shut up," you pat your finger against your chin, a mischievous smile on your lip taunting jude's concern even more. "i don't know why i didn't think of this sooner! why don't you pretend to be my boyfriend? just for the wedding that's it!"

jude shook his head, hands coming up to back out of the idea. it was one thing you lying, but now asking you to play pretend was something totally different. "that's not a good idea y/n..." jude clenched his teeth forcing a smile. "oh cmon why not?"

"well, first of all, that's an even bigger lie to your mom. second, pretending would seem impossible. third, i don't want the first time meeting your parents to be a lie because of what happened," jude defended and stated his case.

"it's a huge favor but you'd save my life jude! one weekend and that's it! you have plenty of suits, you're also off this weekend, and they would never suspect a thing! please jude! i wouldn't be asking if i wasn't so desperate," you begged, seeing the hesitation in his eyes.

"it seems like a bad idea... you don't know what you're asking for y/n... were pretending to be a couple when were not! we have to make it believable even under the pressure of the wedding. a theatrical play, a stunt!" jude exclaimed standing up from his chair.

"jude please, please, please! it might feel weird but it's for the night only! after that, we go back to the good old y/n and jude," you followed him as he paced in your living room thinking of his answer. would it be back to normal even if he continued to feel the same for you? the unknown loving feeling he had for you?

the pretending would be hard when all he could hardly think of was you. how he felt recently and how nervous he got around you. he would do anything for you in a heartbeat, but this would break jude further than now. he couldn't fake pretend holding your hand, or kissing your cheek when he meant and wanted to do that with you currently.

as bad as the idea was, here he was hugging you as you cheerfully yelped when he agreed. time moved slowly for him, the sensation of regret and curiosity as what was yet to come from both of you. all he cared for was to make sure you were happy, and if faking being your boyfriend would help you, he was willing to do it, no matter the consequences.

as jude was fixing his hair, you finished setting your makeup with some powder and setting spray. nerves bubbling in you after the first test you encountered last night after your arrival. you let out a laugh at the tiny bed you had to share with jude. seeing his uneasy face even after he offered to sleep on the couch.

"we're running on schedule," you spoke, finishing clasping your jewelry around your hands and rings. jude came behind you, his shirt unbuttoned and abs in full view, as he finished zipping his pants. best friend or not, there was no denying how incredibly sexy jude was. the name should speak for itself, but with the looks and personality he had, it was too good to be true.

"need some help?" he asked seeing you nod slowly and looking down at your feet. he took the necklace, your skin on fire as his fingertips grazed your skin accidentally, almost jumping on the spot, goosebumps grazing your body. he clasped the necklace, grabbing the pendent and fixing it so it laid in the middle. "perfect," he cockliy smirked.

"thank you."

"are you almost ready?" he looked at you as he buttoned up his shirt, you almost stuttered but regained consciousness, "yes, just need to put my dress and shoes on," you turned back quickly furrowing your brows, wanting to slap yourself for allowing yourself to get carried away, or maybe at the uneasy desire in you when seeing jude.

you went to the bathroom, grabbing the lacy undergarments and the blue dress. the color was to die for, the perfect length even with your heels on, the opened back with the front just showing the perfect amount of cleavage, and the whole dress just accentuating your body even more.

you felt the need to throw some water in your face though you couldn't or else it would ruin your makeup. you settled with fanning yourself with your hand, the tense in your chest getting to you as it was becoming real now. you were just pretending with jude. nothing more right?

you looked in the huge light-up mirror, and suddenly the confidence you had dripped away as you thought of jude in the next room over. why did all of a sudden everything feel like it wasn't before? as in, things changed drastically since the night at your apartment? you've never felt this clumsy or as edgy around him.

when you woke up this morning, with jude on top of you laying peacefully, you couldn't help but feel overjoyed, as if it was a natural state and you've done it before. in your own world where the only thing that mattered was him and you. since then you were slightly freaked out, butterflies in your chest when he left or walk into the room.

jude double taked a look as you walked into the room again. the tiny room that felt like a joke to him after walking in hand to hand last night. his eyes roamed you, lips slightly separated as he admired your beauty, heart hammering in his chest. he watched as you grabbed your cheeks, immediately offering to help.

he leaned down, gently grabbing your foot and placing the white jeweled heel on you. your hands were clamped around the small bench cushions, jude looking up then and there to make sure they felt comfortable. once again, his touch felt like fire, playing with your head even more.

when he finished clasping the heel, he extended his hand helping you up. "you look absolutely gorgeous y/n... this dress was made for you," jude croaked, hearing you laugh shakily. "thank you jude. likewise," jude smiled at your reaction, "i mean as in you look super handsome with the suit, not a dress!" you explained.

"i think i got what you meant..." he joked, his eyes roaming uo and down again at you. "good. good. shall we head out?" you swallowed heavily, grabbing your purse, phone, and other stuff you needed for the night. you were in a rush, wanting to get some fresh air or you would explode in the room with jude inside. "lead the way y/n."

jude helped you in an out of the cab, his hand on your bare back as he guided you to the double doors leading into the reception. "how are you feeling? any nerves?" you spoke quietly to him, looking around as people were taking their seats or had their own conversations.

"some but not too many. like you said, it's just for today," he whispered along your ear, gently giving your shoulder a kiss as his hands went to your hips and walked you forward. your mom and aunt gasped, grabbing their dresses and walking towards you, almost sprinting. "here goes nothing," you say.

"oh my god! so you are real!" your mom yelped, making you give her a glare and eyes pleading not to make a scene. "i was starting to think my sweet y/n was lying to me about this boyfriend she had," you almost choked on your saliva, clearing your throat at her words. "i am y/n's mom, what is your name?"

"i'm jude. it's a pleasure to finally meet you ma'am," jude shook her hand and leaned down to kiss her cheeks in a greeting manner, the same with your aunt. jude's hand interlocked with yours, the happiness in your mother's eyes never leaving, almost tearing up at the sight of you with your "boyfriend."

"i can't believe it! it's a miracle, my daughter finally has her first boyfriend," she clapped her hands making you wretched at her choice of wording. you did everything to have her at least praise you once in life, and all it took was to have a boyfriend? you brushed away the glum feeling, jude kissing your hand, distracting you from the small burn in your eyes.

"oh my! look at them! they make such a beautiful pair," your aunt gleamed. "we do, don't we?" jude teased them, "took her a while to say yes to me, but i'm very fortunate to be here," jude resumed. "we're very pleased to have you here, anything you need don't hesitate to ask."

after saying hello to other family friends and cousins, you sat for the ceremony. jude wiped a small tear away after your old school friend finished her vows, slapping his shoulder when he made a small joke about your mascara running. "its not funny! the vows were so beautiful," you said.

"it's like we are watching me before you again," he said making you gasp. "jude what are talking about? you literally cried with me?" you recalled laughing, jude looking around scared if someone was hearing you. "please don't remind me... in my defense, i didn't see that ending at all."

after the ceremony, you and jude greeted other families, and most importantly congratulated the bride and groom. their faces ushered with happiness, overall content with how their day was turning out. you had to excuse yourself from jude at one point, your mom dragging you away for your help. jude was left behind with your dad.

"since she was little, she always hated getting thrown or dragged around," your father spoke, taking a sip of his whiskey. "seems like nothing had changed?" jude asked carefully with a playful smile. "oh not even close! it's my wife doing," he winked.

"jude right?"

"yes sir," jude nodded, presenting the dad talk coming up. "I'm gonna save the unnecessary talk and get straight to the point. it's so weird to see my baby girl all grown up, with the lusting and loving eyes she gives you. you love her very much and i can see that which is why i'm not worried about you hurting or losing her trust."

hell if jude didn't feel guilty before, he did now. he gripped the glass harder, nodding to your dad who looked upset. "she may have told you some stuff about us, but at the end of the day, she's my daughter and i love her the way she is... please just take good care of her for me... she been through enough as it is..."

"i only have good intentions and i promise you i won't ever break her heart," jude promised to your dad, but also himself. he would never be able to forgive himself if he ever did break your heart or make you lose the trust you had. max did it once and jude would never do it. even if it meant keeping away these long feelings for you.

when you returned you saw them laughing and chatting away, your heart full of emotions at them getting along. jude was so mature for his age, and it didn't come to a surprise when he got along with your dad so fast. his hand would naturally lay on your back or on your hip.

the next few hours were filled with more people dancing or chatting away. jude insisting you sat on his lap for a picture when the photographer passed, smiling wide, looking like a happy couple. it seemed so natural to you, being this close and intimate you were getting scared at how fast everything was being thrown at you.

"i had to see it for myself! y/n bagging a footballer? never saw that coming," your cousin approached you giving you a high as he dabbed up jude. "jude meet my cousin adrian, he's a huge fan of you, and just successfully signed with a small club," you introduced them to each other, with a huge grin on your face.

jude’s hand snuck around your waist, his thumb drawing shapes as his full attention was with your cousin who spoke about sports. you listened then and there, but your feet began to ache, switching your weight back and forth uncomfortably.

jude was quick to notice, leaving down to your level and asking if you were okay. “i’m fine i promise, these shoes are killing me that’s all,” you reassured with a smile, jude nodding before cutting the conversation after a few minutes. “i’m going to get her a chair and drinks for us,” you froze when he kissed your temple, “i’ll see you around later,” jude said his goodbyes dragging you along slowly.

like before, your chest beat faster, if he stared, smiled, even touched or got near you, you’d get nervous immediately. the familiar string of falling for someone filling the empty space left behind inside you. he was super good at pretending and it didn’t feel like that anymore.

it felt real. was he just pretending? or was he actually taking this fake relationship seriously and real?

all you could do was stare at his face, mostly his gorgeous brown eyes as he helped you get seated and served you some water, making sure you were fully okay. he sat next to you, his hand interlocking with his, and placing it on his lap as he paid attention to his surroundings. you become quiet, so into your head and questioning his every move now.

“jude?” you spoke softly, a confused smile on your face as he immediately turned to you with a soften gaze. you inhaled a breath, unable to look away from him, his ínstese state causing you to feel intimidated. “is everything okay?” he asked, leaning slightly over to you, pushing a small string of hair back. “is it supposed to feel like this?”

“what is?” jude shook his head not understanding.

“us? why am i getting the idea we’re no longer pretending…”

jude tore his gaze from yours, the panic growing more intense when he wouldn't reply back. "jude please... don't push me away. are we just pretending or has something changed?" you persisted, your hand gliding against his back to get his attention. jude debated, afraid of losing you right here and now, or having the possibility to maybe hear you feel the same way.

"come with me," jude demanded, helping your and dragging you to the dance floor where no one could really see you besides the other happy couples. his hands circled your waist, as yours went to his shoulders, unable to look away from him. "tell me i'm not the only one who feels it..."

"tell me what you feel y/n... what your head is begging to scream out..."

"i can't, i don't know jude. i'm afraid yet so confused? since we got here yesterday things feel different between us. it happened again when we had breakfast, when you put my necklace on, my heels! all of this is giving me mixed signals jude... i haven't felt this in so long.." you confess, a shaky breath escaping your lips when he pulls you closer and kisses your head.

"like now. i can't if you just did that out of pretending or because it came naturally to you. i've never had to worry about what you think till recently... it feels strange... yet ican't help but get hope that it means real," you rest your forehead on his shoulder blinking away the tears that slowly begin to let out.

jude could see how this was affecting you, holding your lower body with one hand and the other smoothing down your spine, feeling how you immediately let loose and relaxed by his praise and touch. jude could also feel the heavy weight beginning to feel heavier if he kept his true hidden feelings away. it was a sign, and there was no going back.

jude's hand cradled your chin, forcing you to look up at his, his brown eyes gazing over your teary face. he was truly amazed and so in love with you it made his head feel cloudy, almost dizzy, at how perfect and pure you were. his tummy fluttering at his gorgeous girl who was confused at how she felt... but in this moment jude knew you were in deep as well.

"tell me something, when you see me, does it make your heart race, like i'm the only person standing there?" you nod, "does your head tell you one thing but your gut tells you another when you see me?" you nod again, this time blowing the air out of jude's lungs. "my head tells me i shouldn't, but my gut tells me i waited so long that maybe it's now to late for us..."

"why would it be too late y/n...?" you shrug your shoulders. "because i don't you feel the same way i'm feeling." jude smiled weakly, his thumb brushing along your jaw, hearing your hum in delight, "how can you know when you haven't asked me?"

your eyes search his for any sign but you don't find any, "what are you feel in this moment jude?"

"that i'm the luckiest man to be here with you tonight," he says proudly, "that i don't think we've wasted any time, rather i feel we're barely getting started on this new branch of our lives... i can't pretend when i'm with you... because pretending to hide how i feel has been so hard, when all i want is you. all of you y/n..."

"i had to see you go through that idiot max, how he hurt you? when you were hurt i was even more devastated because i couldn't protect you. i'd do anything to make you happy or laugh because it's what i want to do. i want to be the only one who gets to do that. i promised your dad but myself also, ask me what the promise is..." jude insisted.

"what's your promise jude?"

"that i'd never break your heart or give you a reason to doubt me. that from this day forward, i completely will give you my all to care and relish our love once and for all. i'm tired of waiting and holding back of what should've existed and started when i first met you."

"jude-"

"i want to give you my all, to be devoted and in love with you forever. you have no idea what you make me feel, think! i wake up longing for you, at work, at my own home. you're the only girl i want and need in my life y/n," jude confessed, the weight finally lifted of his shoulders, now being able to feel like a free man.

you closed your eyes, breathing out a happy chuckle in relief. you sniffled, "you've ruined me jude, completely ruined me with your words, your confession! look at me, i'm worse than when we finished watching the vow!" you joked, hand nestling on the nape of his next, stroking his soft skin.

"you love me jude?"

"more than what you think."

"i need you to know i'm giving you my all as well. I've always sensed how different what we had was, and come to find out, i was just scared and felt the need to push away because you didn't feel the same way. what i feel for you never happened with who shall not be named..." jude chuckles, closing his eyes and swallowing a heavy gulp like you.

"i'm so hopelessly in love with you jude bellingham... so in love, i want to grow old with you, make every promise we said out loud come true. i knew i loved you as soon as we laid eyes, and you stumbled over your words," jude squinted his eyes, shaking his head embarrassed. "kiss me jude."

jude kissed you exactly how he dreamed. your lips soft and sweet as he imagined, even better. cradling your chin to tilt and pulling the kiss deeper. it felt so right, so amazing, so passionate. he was lost, his tongue entering your parted lips when you let out a small gasp and whimper. there was no more pretending, this was more real than ever.

"could get lost in how you taste. how you feel. i love you so much angel."

#jude bellingham #judey thoughts 5️⃣ #jude bellingham x reader #jude bellingham blurb #jude bellingham imagine #jude bellingham one shot #jude bellingham fanfic #jude bellingham fic #football fanfic #footballer #football x reader #football imagine #football one shot

[songmingisthighs]

You <3 I

group : ateez

pairing : mingi × reader

genre : smut, oneshot

wc : 2 k

warning : mdni, sex, mature content, soft dom!mingi, unprotected sex (it's condom not sindom)

a/n : requested by @certifiedmoa

buy me coffee ?

Travelling with your boyfriend for his work has never been an issue for you. Heck, it's fun because you both get to explore places and cultures together and if you look stupid, at least you look stupid together and you were sharing that moment. You love him, truly and dearly, but sometimes you do wonder if he loves you or his work more.

It had been two hours since you both checked into the hotel, approximately an hour and a half since his manager told him that there was no schedule today si he was allowed to explore on his own. But what did your boyfriend do? Plant his ass on a chair and work. Sure, most days this happen, you'd just stick by him and accompany him finishing up his work. But most days you're in his studio and where you were was definitely not his studio. So many potential of fun yet his focus is doing something he'd usually complain about days on end. He didn't even realize that you had been sitting on the bed, pouting and glaring at him for the past 10 minutes.

Well, if you wanted to do something, it was now or never.

Just as Mingi was about to clip the audio, his iPad was taken out of his hands and off his lap and before he could complain, you had carefully placed yourself in straddle on his lap. "Baby!" He exclaimed, trying to reach for his iPad but you closed the cover and placed it on a nearby coffee table. "Don't you 'baby' me," you huffed, crossing your arms on your chest, "I have been waiting for you to get off your ass and do something with me for two hours, Mingi, I am not kidding when I said you seem to pay more attention to your work than me even when we're at a four star hotel with a nice view!"

Your rant surprised Mingi mostly because he hadn't realized that it had been two hours since he "checked out" his work. He swore he had only wanted to take a peek of the revision he uploaded but time slipped past him and he felt bad.

"Aww, I'm sorry baby," his big hands grabbed you gently by the hips and his thumb began rubbing gentle circles over your leggings, "I didn't realize I was taking that long. Can I make it up to you?"

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Maybe Mingi being so overly focused on his job was a good thing if it means that you were getting eaten out this good.

"F-fuck," you gasped, head lolling back as your chest arched to the ceiling. From between your spread legs, Mingi looked up at you with a satisfied smirk on his lips, "Feeling good, baby?" He chuckled. The movement of his lips on your clit paired with the vibration of his voice made you shuddered out a sigh and thighs threatening to snap around Mingi's head. He didn't even bother pulling your leggings and panties all the way off, they were simply pulled down to your knees and each movement you made, the flimsy garment rode up, securing Mingi's position on your cunt. "Better than good, I-I, shit- M-Mingi please, I wanna cum," you whined, hands gripping the sheets tightly due to desperation. Oh-so-simply, Mingi drag his tongue from your opening slowly to your clit muttering loud enough for you to hear, "Fuck, so eager. My sweet, sweet love being so good for me by making me happy. Do whatever you want on me, you deserve as much."

The words that came out of Mingi's mouth felt more like an order than permission and it made you visibly shudder. So you grabbed onto the sheets beneath you and began grinding your cunt on Mingi's face. It was as if your hips had a mind of its own with how feantic the movements seem. The moment you realized the way your body reacted to him, you tried putting some space between you two from being shy all of a sudden but Mingi seem to be enjoying every bit of it as seen from the way his hands turned like talons, gripping the underside of your thighs tightly, making sure his nails were making crescent indents to mark you.

Just as you were about to cum hard on his tongue, Mingi ripped his lips away from your nether ones abruptly sending you nearly jumping up only for Mingi to move quicker than you by pressing on your chest gently gently as he only wanted to ensure your position and pushing you down on the bed. You don't know which was hotter, the sight of Mingi panting, the flush of his cheeks paired with the glaze in his eyes, or the way his tongue ran along his bottom lip, greedily collecting your juice as if not wanting them to go to waste. "Baby, I'm sorry but if you're gonna cum, it's gonna be on my cock," he panted.

It was your last warning before he pushed your knees open and expertly nudge the tip of his cock into your pulsing hole. The pressure of the head made your eyes roll back into your head while your hips tried to meet his movements only to fail because he was keeping you in position. Meanwhile, Mingi was enjoying the tension from holding himself back. Between feeling your warm cunt that provided a biting edge of pleasure and watching your eyes watering from anticipation, Mingi didn't know which was better. With a roll of his hips, his cock slowly entered you. Your head was thrown back and your thighs tensed from the delicious drag of his length filling you up until it was completely sheathed inside you, the tip kissing your cervix which sent a chill down your spine.

Though Mingi himself wanted to move and his hips found it hard to remain still, he enjoyed how you look falling apart on his cock with the way you gasped and bit your bottom lip from your pleasure. A rumble bubble in his chest from how hard he tried to control himself so before he completely lost it, he began peppering kisses along your jaw and exposed neck. "Baby, baby," his voice managed to pause your whining momentarily but not your squirming, "I need to move, okay? Can you handle that? Can you handle me making love to you? I wanna see you cum when I fill you up, okay?" Though Mingi didn't mean to rile you up, your breath became laboured and with a low whine, you grabbed the back of his neck and locked lips with him.

Mingi took your action as permission for him to move so he began rolling his hips upwards, meeting your pubic bones with each wave of movement.

Neither you nor him were experts in sex per se, but you both were just so compatible with each other that your connection reached the most intimate aspects of your lives. A lot can be said about the minimal movement Mingi did; starting from the way he cupped the back of your head, to the way he let your fingers tangle together in a firm yet loving grip, and the way he minimized the chance of you two being detached by grinding on you rather than jackhammering his talented hips on you. It felt great because you were stimulated in different ways all at once, something you had never experienced before you met Mingi and while it took a while for you both to be able to understand what worked for each other, you both did a pretty good job of taking mental notes of what the other like.

Especially Mingi.

While Mingi had a rather higher level of libido, he found himself feeling even more pleasure when he was able to pleasure you. The idea of you unravelling from him, being so affected, it was an ego boost. And you supported that idea by letting him know that you have never felt like that before. From the moment he made the discovery, he began taking care of you more than he cared about taking care of himself. Technically, when he took care of you, he was most definitely taking care of himself. It was a win-win situation.

"F-fuck- Mingi!" You gasped, your free hand reaching to the back of his head to tug on the soft, short hair near his nape. The tug made Mingi let out a groan followed by a low hum, the lack of space between you two allowed the vibration to hover on the skin of your chest. "Don't do that, baby, I don't wanna go rough on you tonight," he mumbled as he pressed his forehead on yours, letting out a shaky breath before his hips moved even faster.

Maybe it was due to the denial of your previous release but you could feel your high coming. Your body gave away signs of your release and Mingi always seemed to notice it. The corner of his lips tugged upwards and the waves of hip rolls were given a slight edge when he started hitting you harshly. The impact caused you to almost got sent reeling back and on instinct, your free hand wound around his shoulder and held him close. "Fuck!" Mingi grunted when he felt your pebbled nipples rubbing against his chest and your voice echoing in his ears, turning his brain fuzzy. "Baby, I wanna cum in you but you gotta cum for me first, I wanna see you make a mess, can you do that?" It was almost comical that your cunt clenched around him when he said that but he couldn't find it in himself to make a comment.

With your feet locked behind him, resting right above the cute butt that you like to smack in passing, you locked his position and almost immediately, Mingi started pistoning his hips.

Obscene sounds came out of both of you be it from your mouths or from your bodies moving together. Had either of you had any shame left, a permanent blush would be tattooed on your cheeks and you would be sending your hotel neighbours apology letters and fruit baskets. But who cares about other people when one second you were holding onto your boyfriend for dear life and the next, your cunt had a vice grip that was hard enough to make Mingi hiss and still as he release his load in you when he felt your body trembling against his.

Mingi let out a silent huff followed by an almost silent 'fuck' which was only so because your orgasm caused your ear to ring. In the haze of your high, you could hear Mingi muttering about not wanting to cum that fast and blaming you for being too damn hot. If your face was not warm before, Mingi's cleverly veiled sexual compliment would've been able to allow you to warm up a hot pocket by just pressing it to your cheeks.

Sex with Mingi always took your breath away and it wasn't just because he fucks like a drill in an oil rig but it was also because it was... Him. Even as you lay there, trying to catch your breath, Mingi hovered above you with an arm propped so he could watch you.

"Stop looking at me like that!" you whined, trying to shield his gaze away by covering your face only for him to whine and shove your hands gently to the sides. "Like what, like you're the only person I've ever loved in my life?" he smirked, laughing when you smacked him square in his chest. "I'm gonna have to ask you to say that again so I can record it and send it to your mom," you teased, rolling your eyes as if you were annoyed but the slight tug on the corners of your lips gave your true feelings away.

"Are you okay now?" Mingi asked, asking if you'd fully caught your breath. Letting out one last sigh, you nodded, thinking that he was finally taking you out of the hotel.

But you soon found Mingi had another idea in mind because soon, he repositioned himself between your spread legs with a teasing glint in his eyes and the once softened cock coming back alive inside you.

"Great, because I'm not done with my plan on making this your best trip just yet."

network :

@cultofdionysusnet @sandsofire @kflixnet @pirateeznet

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[sunny44]

Meeting Hazel

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Wife&mom!reader

Warnings: hospital, mentions of birth

Summary: Y/n and Charles welcome their second born.

Finally, the hustle and bustle of the hospital had subsided. After hours of labor, I finally held our little Hazel in my arms. Her angelic face, wrapped in a soft pink blanket, seemed too perfect to be real. I looked at Charles, my husband, who smiled radiantly beside me, his eyes shining with pure admiration and love.

“You did an amazing job, amour.” he murmured, kissing my forehead tenderly. “She’s perfect.”

I smiled, tears of happiness streaming down my face.

“Thank you, Charles. I couldn’t have done it without you.” He smiled. “Literally couldn’t.”

“Very funny.” He gently brushed my forehead. “She’s perfect.”

“She is.” I smiled, looking at her. “But it’s the second time I get pregnant and the second time they look just like you.”

“What can I say, I’m very good at what I do.” He held my hand delicately, his fingers intertwining with mine.

“I’ll always be by your side, Y/n. And now we have our little family complete.”

As we got lost in the emotion of being parents again, a kind nurse gently reminded us that it was time for Charles to go home, take a shower, and rest a bit. He nodded, reluctant to leave our side, but knowing he needed a moment to recharge. But before leaving, he promised to bring Harvé, our three-year-old son, to meet his baby sister.

It was already night, and Charles waited for me to take a shower because I didn’t want to leave her with anyone else, so the nurses helped me in the shower, and after I got out, he said goodbye and left, promising that he and Harvé would be here first thing in the morning.

I went to breastfeed her and held Hazel in my arms, admiring every detail of her little face. She was so small and fragile, and she looked just like Charles.

I was almost certain that she would at least resemble me a little bit, but no, she was his spitting image, just like Harvé is.

Even their eye color was the same.

…

When Charles returned the next morning with Harvé, my heart filled with joy at seeing them walk through the door. Harve ran up to me, his eyes shining with excitement.

“Mommy! I came to meet Hazel!” he said, trying to climb onto the bed, and Charles lifted him and put him there.

“Be careful buddy. Don’t hug mommy too hard.” He agrees and lies down next to me and hugs me.

I hugged him affectionately, feeling tears welling up in my eyes again.

“She’s here, Harvé. Do you want to meet her?”

He nodded eagerly, his curious eyes fixed on little Hazel in my arms. Charles approached, smiling proudly.

“Harvé, this is your little sister, Hazel.”

he said, holding Harve in his lap so he could see better. “And Hazel, this is your big brother Harvé.”

Harvé looked at Hazel with admiration, his expression softening as he looked at her little face.

“She’s so tiny, daddy.” he observed, gently touching Hazel’s hand. “Does she knows k have Grand-père?”

“You can tell her later when se wakes up.” He nodded.

I smiled, watching the instant bond forming between them.

“Do you want to hold her, Harvé?” I asked, carefully offering Hazel to him.

He nodded enthusiastically, his eyes shining with excitement. Carefully, he held Hazel in his arms, his expression one of pure happiness. I obviously supported her weight, she was just lying in his arms.

“Hello, Hazel.” he said softly, stroking her face with his finger. “I’m your big brother, Harvé. I’ll always protect you.”

My heart melted at Harvé’s kind words. He was so sweet and gentle, so ready to love his little sister from the moment we told him I was pregnant. I knew they would have a special bond that would last forever.

As he held Hazel carefully, he suddenly remembered something and asked to get off the bed and ran out of the room. He returned shortly after, holding a small stuffed animal in his hands.

“I brought this for you, Hazel.” he said, handing the stuffed animal that Carlos gave him when he was born and he’s giving to his little sister. “It’s my favorite bear, uncle Carlos gave it to me. I hope you like it as much as I do.”

I smiled, touched by the look of pure happiness in Harvé’s eyes as he gifted Hazel.

“Oh sweetheart, thank you so much and I’m sure she’ll love it.” I said, holding his hand gratefully. “And I also gonna help her sleep like it did to you.”

Harvé smiled widely, his eyes shining with joy.

“I love you, mommy. I love you, daddy. I love you, Hazel.” he said, looking at each of us with love and tenderness.

We hugged him affectionately, feeling the love and gratitude flooding our hearts. I knew that from that moment on, our family would be united forever, facing life’s challenges together and celebrating its joys.

As I watched Charles hold Hazel in his arms, Harvé beside him with his stuffed bear, I felt complete. The journey to this point had been long and challenging, but now, with our little family by my side, I knew it had all been worth it. And as I held Charles’s hand and watched our children together, I knew I couldn’t ask for anything more in life.

Bonus scene!

Y/nleclerc instagram post

Liked by @charlesleclerc, @maxverstappen, @yourmom and others 293729

Y/nleclerc These past few months have been an emotional rollercoaster, Charles and I welcomed our daughter into the world and we couldn't be happier. Thank you to all our friends, family, and even fans who have given us so much support during this time.

Charles, myself, Harvé and little Hazel are incredibly grateful for everything.

#f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 x you #f1 #f1 instagram au #charles leclerc #charles leclerc au #charles leclerc f1 #charles leclerc angst #charles leclerc aesthetic #charles leclerc series #charles leclerc story #charles leclerc smut #charles leclerc social media au #charles leclerc scenarios #charles leclerc drabble #charles leclerc fluff #charles leclerc fanfic #charles leclerc fanart #charles leclerc ferrari #charles leclerc x oc #charles leclerc x female reader #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc x female oc #charles leclerc x reader #Charles Leclerc x mom reader #charles leclerc one shot #charles leclerc masterlist #charles leclerc blurb #charles leclerc imagine

[shadeysprings]

So Good. So Bad.

—Stalker!Ex-Boyfriend!Lloyd Hansen x F!Reader

Summary — The Halloween party you and your friends attend turns upside down all because of your jealous ex.

Warnings — noncon/dubcon, toxic relationship, mass murd3r, k!lling spree, somewhat public sex, cuckolding of some sort, almost drugging, Lloyd being toxic and psychotic. There may be more I haven't mentioned but please read with caution.

Word Count — 7.2K

A/N — I know I said Sunday but my muse said no. Story #2 for my FREAKtober Fest and my second time exploring Lloyd as a character. The writing process was tedious yet exciting. The title and inspiration of this fic was taken from the song ILYSB.

Gif by the amazing @steve-kemp

As always, your feedback is highly appreciated and your reblogs would be amazing. And of course, I hope y'all enjoy! ❤️

Aside from having the same shift as your best friends, restocking is the only thing you like about your work. Although it’s physical, it’s mostly mindless tasks done repeatedly, and the black shirt you wear acts like a shield from annoying customers who pester the ones in blue.

Your shift starts like clockwork; time in, grab the products from the warehouse, and begin stocking the shelves until you have to clock out. Though today was a bit more taxing than you expected with the cable aisle once more in disarray and you being tasked to reorganize and set everything in its proper place. You don’t understand the need to put in so much effort into something that will just end up messy at the end of the day.

But you do it anyway. 

Upon arriving at the aisle, you begin sorting out the boxes and dismantling the hooks from the shelves. You’re happy enough to be doing this alone—the quicker you work, the faster you’ll be able to relax and waste the time away. That is, until Kate stands beside you, seemingly tensed as she starts helping you. 

“He’s here again. TV aisle.” You don’t need for her to say anything more to know who she’s referring to and it just makes you sigh as you grab a box of an HDMI cable and hang it on the hook. “Jensen’s trying to help him but he’s being pushy about talking to you. How does he always know when you’re here? Didn’t you already change shifts?” She asks.

How you wish you knew the answer to that. “I did.” You say in exasperation. “Did he say I was on break?”

“You know we can’t lie. Besides, we have no idea if he already saw you before he came in. He could have seen you while you were on your smoke break.” She expounds and you feel a sudden wave of exhaustion wash over you. “Just—talk to him. Tell him to leave. If he tries anything, we’ll call the cops.”

“Yeah. Like they’ll do anything about it. Vince wouldn’t even allow that—bad publicity and all.” The sigh that once more leaves your lips is despondent. You don’t know what else you can do to make him leave you alone. “Fine. I’ll deal with him.” The box in your hand ends up being crumpled from annoyance.

“We’ll be keeping watch.” She says, a measly attempt to comfort you. But you take it anyway with a smile and push away from your cart to hopefully turn away the pesky client.

It’s been almost two years since you broke up with Lloyd. The sweet air that he once had turned bitter when you saw just how jealous of a person he was. You thought it was cute at first, comforting him after a fit and telling him that he was the only man in your life—until it wasn’t and he threatened your friend, John, even challenging him to a fight at the back of the club when he placed his arm on your shoulder as he introduced you to his girlfriend. 

Since then, he changed and the relationship you thought was almost perfect, snowballed into endless fights and the revelation of the toxicity he kept hidden. You thought you could make him realize that there was truly nothing to worry about, that his jealousy was misplaced. But you were very wrong, especially after he demanded you quit your job and move in with him instead. You’d make a really good housewife, was what he said and you knew you had to draw the line.  

It wasn’t the life you wanted. And it pained you to leave because you did love him but with the way he acted, you questioned if he truly felt the same for you for even the simplest of things, he failed to trust you. And ever since, he hasn’t stopped following you. Everywhere you went, at work or home, he was there, simply watching, observing and you’ve done all you can to push him away. But no matter how hard you try, he can’t take the word no.

The first thing you notice when you see him is the twitch of his mustache when he smirks. He looks pristine as ever with his yellow polo shirt and white slacks that match his black loafers—a complete mismatch to your black shirt, jeans and sneakers uniform. And it has you thinking, what the hell did he see in you?

“The new models just came in yesterday,” You hear Jensen tell him but it’s obvious that Lloyd is not listening, certain that he’s staring at you even with his blue eyes covered by sunglasses. “I can show them—”

“Ah, just the girl I was looking for.” He says, cutting off Jensen and stepping past him to head over to you. 

“Sir, she’s one of our warehouse staff. I’d be happy to assist you in—”

“Beat it, nerd!” Lloyd snaps as he stops to face Jensen, rolling your eyes at his misplaced annoyance. “She’s the one I want to talk to.”

“It’s okay, Jen. I got this.” You tell your co-worker, gesturing for him to leave.

“You sure? I can stay if you need any he—”

“Are you fucking deaf?! She said she’s got it, loser!” Lloyd turns from where he stands and you’re suddenly alarmed to see him charge over at Jensen. “Beat it or I’ll make you.” He threatens and you immediately wedge yourself between both men when you see Jensen isn’t backing down.

You place your hands against Lloyd’s chest, stopping him from getting any closer. “Lloyd, stop it! Not here—Christ!” Your voice raises an octave when you scold him, facing Jensen right after and unintentionally glaring at him. “Just go, Jake! I said I got this!” It surprises you that you sound quite like Lloyd but it doesn’t deter you from pushing Lloyd back further.

You hear Jensen speak but don’t understand him as you grab Lloyd by the hand and pull him over to the other aisle, heat rising up your neck when you notice several of the shoppers looking in your direction. There’s never any peace with Lloyd—everywhere he goes, chaos follows.

Once you’ve pulled him away from prying eyes, you startle when he stops walking and tugs on your hand, his arm immediately wrapping around your waist as he holds you close. He gives you a sickeningly sweet grin, effectively trapping your hand against his chest.

“What the fuck do you want, Lloyd? Why are you here?” You bite.

“I’m looking for a TV.” He says smoothly, “Besides, I missed my little Kitten and I know that kitty of yours misses me too.”

You want to roll your eyes at his crass comment. “You know I work in the damn warehouse. I know nothing about them.” You reason, grunting as you try to get away from his hold. “We have a sales specialist who can help you with that.”

“Oh, but I want you to show me the options.” The hair on his lip twitches when he smirks, “Or I can complain to your manager that his employees aren’t helpful to their customers.”

“Seriously? You’re going to act like a fucking Karen?”

“Would you like to see me try?” He challenges.

That’s the last thing you needed from him and you don’t question that he would stay true to his word and make sure his complaint reached top management. Letting out a sigh, you nod at his request and show your best customer service smile before saying, “How can I help you?”

Your shift finally ends and you can’t wait to go home to wash off the day. After Lloyd pestered you with all the TV selections you showed him, he left with nothing and you tried your best not to show your annoyance at him though he knows he’s riled you up—he always does. 

Bidding your goodbyes to Kate and the rest as you leave the store with Jensen in tow. He offered a ride to the station—something he always does and one you couldn’t refuse after the long day. You just want to go home and curl up in your room and hope that Lloyd doesn’t show himself again after that awful stint. 

“Tough day, huh?” Jensen asks as he brings the engine to life and drives off from the parking lot. 

“Yeah. I’m just glad it’s over.” You respond, leaning back against your seat while you hug your backpack against your chest.

“Yeah.” He echoes, hearing his fingers tap against the wheel. “The line at the tech depot was pretty long too. Seems like every computer within town is falling apart.” He jokes, and you think it’s an attempt to lighten the mood. You still feel tense with the altercation he had with Lloyd—you just wish for once one of them would listen to you. 

“Hey, sorry about earlier.” He says and you visibly cringe when he mentions it. “I know you could handle him but knowing that he’s bothering you, I couldn’t just step away from—”

“Look. Jensen.” You sigh as you turn to face him. “I appreciate your concern, really, I do. But no offense, it’s none of your business. I don’t need a knight in shining armor to come and rescue me each time that idiot shows up. The others stay away because of how reckless he can be and I just don’t want you to get caught in the line of fire. Just let me handle him.”

You know full well why Jensen couldn’t get past that. After admitting to you his feelings since he found out you were single, he’s been subtly dropping hints about asking you out. You’d probably have taken up the offer if you met him before Lloyd but the trauma your ex has imprinted on you just leaves you thinking that any man who would dare go near would be the same. 

Silence fills the small space, along with a flicker of tension. You think Jensen would disapprove of your words, that he would insist on giving his unwarranted help. But all you hear is a sigh and you see the nod of his head. 

“Okay.” He utters, the rubber covering the steering wheel squeaking when his hold on it tightens. “I won’t meddle any—”

“JENSEN!” You shout and grab onto the handle of your seat when a car suddenly turns and blocks your path, Jensen stepping hard onto the brakes. 

“What the fuck?!” He shouts as he rolls down his window but you, on the other hand, sit still when you see Conrad, one of Lloyd’s buddies, step out of the car and walk over to Jensen’s side. “What the hell is wrong with you, bro?!” Jensen growls as he unlocks his door, ready to step out.

But you’re too late to warn him—Conrad pulling open the door and grabbing him by the collar of his shirt, trapping him against the side of his car. Lloyd then suddenly appears, with Chris in tow. He goes first to Jensen, the latter flinching when he raises his fist at him, threatening to lay a punch before leaning down and framing his arms over the edge of the window.

Your eyes dart to Jensen when he grunts against Conrad’s grip, glaring at Lloyd when he stares you down. “What the fuck are you doing here, Lloyd?!”

His eyes meet yours, darkness swirling around the blue and you can already tell that he’s angry. “What are you doing here, Kitten?” He says, a cocky grin on his face. “You couldn’t wait for me to pick you up so you got into this loser’s car?” He tuts, chin nodding over to your side and your door suddenly opens, Chris, pulling you out aggressively. 

You look around, hoping to call for help but you curse Jensen when you notice he went through the back roads. No one ever passes here, especially at this hour, and now the both of you are at the mercy of your ex who you see looming over your co-worker. 

You gasp when Lloyd sends him a punch, trying to pull away from Chris’ grasp to help Jensen, but it’s no use. You’re rendered helpless as you watch him send another blow, making the other bowl over to which Conrad pushes him further to the ground.

“Stay away from my girl, asshole!” Lloyd threatens before spitting at the other man, your eyes grow wide when Lloyd takes you from Chris and drags you to his car. 

You hear the sound of tires being slashed and several glass breaking along with Jensen’s pained grunts. You knew Lloyd could be reckless but you’ve never seen him this way before. He opens the passenger door and pushes you in, slamming the door harshly before getting inside himself. He doesn’t wait for his companions before driving off, your hand grabbing the side of the door with the speed he’s going. 

“What the hell is wrong with you?!” You shout. “Let me out of here!”

“You keep testing me, Kitten. Running off with other men like that.” He growls and you scream when he takes a sharp left, cars honking left and right at how careless he’s driving. 

“Are you that daft?! We’re over, Lloyd! We’ve been for years!” You shout amidst the panic that rolls through your veins, eventually getting the courage to hit him on the shoulder when he gets on the main road. 

But you soon realize your mistake when he stops at an alley and his hand immediately wraps around your neck, pulling you towards him. You grab on his wrist when he squeezes tight, your eyes wide as you fear that he would choke you, kill you on the spot. 

“Lloyd—” you gasp, slapping on his hand as tears fall from your eyes. “Y—you’re hurting me.”

“I will only say this once, Kitten, so you better listen.” His hot breath spreads across your cheek when he pulls you closer, the tick on his jaw setting you on edge. “You’re mine and no one, not even you, can change that fact. Got it?”

All you can do is nod, to agree with every word he says if it means you get to keep your life. 

“Good.” He huffs, the anger in him somewhat seeping away, loosening his hold around your neck. “Good girl.” The praise that used to send shivers of desire within you now has your stomach twisting in disgust. “And if I see that weirdo or any other man going near you again, you know what will happen.”

You nod once more and gasp when he completely releases you, leaning against your seat as you try to regulate your breathing.

He drives once more and you’re thankful he’s slower this time, doing your best to stay calm as you look out the window. “Where are you taking me?” You ask, although you already have an inkling of his answer when you recognize the area you’re in and the direction he’s driving to. You haven’t driven in and out of these roads for almost two years. After you and Lloyd broke up.

The smirk he gives you is enough of an answer.

“Are we going to pre-game before the party?” Bucky asks as he plops down onto the couch in the employee lounge, shaking a tumbler of his protein shake in his hand. “Last year’s booze ran out so fast, I went home seeing straight. I don’t want to be sober on Halloween night.”

“You never want to be sober, Barnes,” Kate comments as she rolls her eyes, yet her interest seems to already be piqued. “But he’s right. Are we going to drink before the party or should we just hit the club after? I have a friend who can get us in at this club for free.”

“That could work but I’d rather enjoy the night drunk then get wasted at the club.” Bucky responds, taking a sip of his drink. “We could just meet up at someone’s place and pre-game there, then we can all go to the party together. Would save us gas too if we just take one car.”

“Who even lives near the venue?” 

You tune yourself out from their conversation and stab your fork into your lunch as the Halloween party is the last of your concerns. Besides, you don’t think Lloyd would be happy with you attending and you wouldn’t dare give him the opportunity to ruin the event for you and your friends or give him any reason to be mad again. 

Your friends exchange ideas, listing down people’s names of who they’ll be inviting for their plan of drinks and whose place they’ll be crashing when the door of the lounge opens and you freeze in your seat when Bucky calls out Jensen’s name.

“Hey buddy! You live downtown, right?” Bucky asks, patting the space beside him to which Jensen accepts. “We were thinking that—the fuck happened to your face?”

Your grip on your fork tightens when you chance a peek at both men, feeling your stomach drop when you see the bruise staining Jensen’s cheek. 

“Oh that?” Jensen chuckles, his fingers running against the side of his face. “I wasn’t looking where I was going and I slammed against my door frame.” You know he’s lying, though you’re somewhat thankful he didn’t expose what Lloyd and his friends did. Still, you feel the guilt nipping at the back of your neck. 

“You’re such a klutz, Jake.” Kate says with a laugh. 

Jensen makes a face in her direction and you look away when his eyes meet yours. “Why were you guys asking if I lived downtown?” He suddenly asks, shifting the topic. 

Bucky takes the lead again. “We were thinking of doing drinks before heading to the party. And since you live closer to the venue, maybe we could just meet at your place?”

“Depends. Do I have to provide the booze?”

“We can bring some and you prepare some.” Kate responds. “Sounds good?”

Jensen hums audibly as he thinks of his decision. You feel the tension circling around you as you sense his eyes on you while he speaks. You don’t dare to look up, keeping your focus trained on the lifeless pasta in your lunch container.

“I’m in. Though who’s coming? My apartment isn’t that big so I can’t really hold a huge crowd.” He finally says.

“I’m there.” Bucky says, mouth full of his protein shake. “Tell me what you guys want and I’ll bring it.”

“Me too. Though I’m bringing my boyfriend along—that cool with you guys?” No one seems to object and you look up to face your best friend when she nudges you. “You’re coming too, right? Amber’s dragging Nick along and we won’t be complete without you. I even planned this super cool costume for us.”

You feel your body shake at her question. The pressure of going to the event with your best friends growing in your chest, colliding with the added stress of meeting at Jensen’s place and the fear of Lloyd finding out about the plan. 

“I don’t know.” You say with a frown, closing up your container as your appetite has already turned sour from the anxiety crawling up your spine. “You know I don’t do well at parties. I’ll just stink up the mood.”

“Aww come on. Please?” She begs with those puppy eyes she always uses to convince you. “You’ll be with us and if it gets too much, we’ll leave. And if you’re worried about that psycho ex of yours showing up, I can just show Andy in his direction and he’ll show him a thing or two.” You want to latch onto the assurance she gives you but she doesn’t know Lloyd like you do. 

Still, you could probably think of a way to convince him—he’s never been apprehensive of you spending time with your friends. Except it’s not only them who would be with you; Bucky and Jensen would be there as well, and you’ve already witnessed what he’s done to the latter, the evidence staring you in the face. 

And that would mean you would have to lie. Though is it really lying if you’re just omitting out the information he doesn’t want to hear?

But the plan didn’t go as expected. 

Instead of heading over to the company party after drinks at Jensen’s apartment, like what was discussed, you find yourself nursing a red cup full of shitty alcohol in a dimly lit house while surrounded by your friend group and people you only assume to be Bucky’s college frat buddies. 

You tug on the skirt of your black dress that’s a little too short for your liking, the cat headband already irritating you with how long you’ve been wearing it. You don’t know why you’ve agreed to Kate’s idea for the three of you to imitate the costume from that movie—you’re just glad she didn’t push you to wear a bodysuit and that Amber was happy to trade with the mouse theme you were originally assigned to do. 

Speaking of your best friends, you walk around the living room as you try to look for them, no longer wanting to be alone amidst the foreign crowd. But you frown when you see Kate at the corner of the room, her boyfriend’s hand planted firmly on her ass while they make out. Amber, on the other hand, was just on the other side, with Nick barricading her against the wall like some prison guard. Though with the smile you see on her face, she doesn’t seem to mind being isolated by him.

Your eyes then dart towards the front door when the cheers of men grow louder than the music blasting in the house. Three people walk in, each one wearing a mask over some effortless casual clothes underneath. But the one wearing the iconic ghostface catches your attention, noticing him looking your way with the other two standing behind him following suit. There’s a somewhat eerie familiarity to their masked gaze that makes you look away and leave from where you stand.

“Not really what you’re expecting, huh?” You startle when someone says too close against your ear, making you look up and chuckle when you see Jensen smiling at you, an opened beer bottle in his hand. 

“It feels like I’m back in college attending a frat party.” You comment, making the both of you laugh and tapping your cup against his bottle when he raises it to you.

“You went to a lot of parties in college?”

You shake your head. “Not really. Wasn’t really a party type.”

“Same. But I had no choice with my roommate dragging me to every party.”

You have no idea why Jensen is speaking to you—after what he endured with Lloyd and his buddies, you’d think he’d steer clear of you, probably even fear you thinking that history would repeat itself. But deep down, you’re happy to be in his company, choosing it over being alone in a place you don’t even know half the people in. 

The both of you chat for a while, finding a less crowded spot in the kitchen and helping yourselves with the food and the drinks that are out and free for the taking. You still feel bad when the bruise on his cheek remains prominent, though with his purple button up and baggy gray slacks, you think it blends well with his cosplay of Bruce Banner when you asked him who he was supposed to be. 

“I’m sorry for what happened to you, Jen.” You tell him with a frown, leaning against the edge of the counter as you look down at your drink. “I didn’t think Lloyd would actually hurt anyone.”

“It’s fine. It’s just a bruise.” He assures, giving your arm a pat.

“What about your car? Didn’t they trash it?”

“They did. But good thing I have insurance.”

It surprises you how positive the air around him still is despite the misfortune he’s met because of you. You almost envy his happiness, and the happiness that your friends have and you find it almost unfair that Lloyd wasn’t like Andy and Nick, doting and loving towards their girls, when both those men are his friends. You wish he’d learn a thing or two from them about handling relationships the proper way. 

Sadness then swirls around you as you contemplate on what your life has become; always scared and cautious, that Lloyd would hurt another because of his jealousy, because of his unspoken obsession to completely possess you.

Your train of thought stops when you feel your cup being taken from your grasp, Jensen replacing it with a fresh one, fizz floating to the top of the amber liquid. “Jack and Coke.” He says. “Your drink looked a little stale.”

But before you could even take a sip, you hear spine tingling screams coming from the living room. You think it’s some scary prank someone has pulled on another, you and Jensen looking at each other and pushing away from your perch to investigate the commotion. But in just a flash of a second, the whole house is in chaos, people running, scrambling for their lives while the three masked men you saw earlier run amok, shooting and stabbing the party goers one by one and leaving them bloody and dead on the ground. 

No sound escapes your lips as you’re gripped by fear upon witnessing the bloodbath, your body refusing to move even when your brain tells it to. But the hand that grabs onto your arm has you shouting in shock, only to be muffled by another and your eyes wide with horror thinking that they’ve got you. But to your relief, it’s only Jensen and he places a finger against his lips, telling you to be quiet before pulling you amongst the havoc for a way out. 

You try the backdoor first but for some unknown reason it wouldn’t budge open no matter how hard he yanks it. He tries the window above the kitchen sink as well but just like the door, it’s screwed shut. He pulls on you once more, leading you down the hall this time, the rave music playing loudly in your ears pumping the adrenaline in your veins while the sound of the screams die out one by one. 

He makes it to the end of the hall, the staircase free from the killers but with bodies lying lifeless on the steps—a woman with her throat cut wide open and a man with a bullet right between his eyes. He looks back at you, telling you to be quiet once more as he gestures that you both will be heading up. But before he could even set foot on the first step, one of the masked men appears and kicks him forward, making him topple over the corpses. 

A scream is then wretched from your throat when you’re suddenly pulled back, the stranger trapping you against him while he positions his knife just under your chin, feeling the sharp edge of the blade kiss your skin. The man from the stairs kicks Jensen in the stomach then again, your co-worker writhing in pain as another joins his attacker, this time with a metal bar which he slams against his chest.

“Hello, nerd! Long time no see.” The one who kicked him greets, the timbre of his voice making your heart pound against your chest. No! “Whatcha doin’ with my girl, huh?” The stranger asks before pulling off his mask and you freeze when you see Lloyd’s face. He then turns to you, a cocky smirk playing on his lips and sending you a wink before he asks, “Whatcha doin’ here, Kitten? Thought you were at a company party?” The sly twist in his voice has you on edge.

The smirk on his face then fades, turning into a scowl when he nods at the man who’s got you trapped against him. You’re then released from his hold but not for long as Lloyd simply takes his place, grabbing you by your arm, wincing from his tight grip and dragging you into the living room where you see countless bodies lying lifeless on the ground and the walls of the house painted crimson.

He shoves you against the couch where you fall against something cold and sticky, only to realize too late, crying out to see that it’s Bucky you landed on; his blood staining your dress and your hands. But you’re then pushed away from him, falling back on the cushions as Lloyd kicks his body off the surface to take the space he once occupied. 

You feel like you’re about to convulse as you cry when Lloyd wraps an arm around you. You try to push away from him, not wanting to be near him but he shakes you like a rag doll, making you stop before gesturing over to someone you cannot see as your eyes are blurry from your tears and remain locked on your dead friend’s feet. 

“Gentlemen, thank you for all your help.” Lloyd says when the music finally dies and you look up, surprised to see Andy and Nick standing unscathed with only splatters of blood staining their costumes. But what has you more jarred is seeing Kate and Amber bound and gagged, sitting against the floor, they’re eyes wide in fear as they squirm to be free from their restraints. 

You’re suddenly off your seat and on your feet, determined to get to them, to help set them free and run away from this horrid place. But Lloyd is quick to yank you back, grunting when you fall onto his lap and his strong arm wrapping around your waist to hold you in place.

“Relax, Kitten. They’re safe.” Lloyd assures, his gloved finger grazing against your cheek. “Just had to go through some extra measures to keep them out of the way.”

“We did our part, Hansen.” Andy says, pulling Kate from the ground who forcefully tries to pull away from his grip while Nick does the same with Amber, who in turn quietly follows while tears keep running down her face. “Just don’t forget the deal.”

“Yeah yeah. Just make sure your bitches know what to say if they’re questioned.” Lloyd responds with disinterest. “Meet me by the end of this week for your payment.”

It’s all the words the men exchange before dragging away your friends, their wide and fearful eyes being the last you see before the door closes behind them. 

The sound of wood being dragged across the tiled floor then makes you look forward, seeing Chris and Conrad, now with their masks off, placing a chair in front of you and Lloyd while the latter drags Jensen’s beaten body and forces him to take a seat. Both men then go to work, effectively binding their captive’s wrists behind his back with tape and his ankles to the legs of the chair.

The sight of his damaged state breaks your heart as you helplessly feel guilty upon thinking that everything that has happened to him is all your fault. You never should have come here in the first place as soon as you found out about the change of plans. You should have just gone home or better yet, you should have just stayed at home where you know Lloyd would be.

Yet the universe could be so cruel.

“Look what we found on him.” Chris says in a serious tone before pulling out a small ziplock bag from Jensen’s shirt pocket and tossing it over your lap. You glance down at the clear packaging, seeing several small white tablets enclosed in it. What?

“Lover boy here was so desperate to get laid he brought roofies with him.” Conrad adds with a laugh, pushing on the back of Jensen’s head hard that his body jolts forward.

The bag is then taken from your lap, Lloyd holding it up close to his face as he inspects the white circles. You yelp when you’re suddenly shoved off his lap, falling over to the floor while Lloyd steps over to Jensen and grabs him by his hair, pulling his head back while he holds the baggie in front of him, breathing heavily like some wild animal through gritted teeth.

“You were gonna drug my girl, weren’t you?!” Lloyd spits out his words and on Jensen’s face, tossing the tablets in Conrad’s direction, your throat eliciting a gasp when he holds a knife to his neck this time. “Did you take any drink from him?!” He asks, but it takes a second for you to realize that he’s talking to you. He turns in your direction, eyes dark with anger. “Any fizzy shit this asshole gave you?!”

You don’t understand what he’s asking, why the sudden interrogation—then it hits you. In the kitchen while you were busy with your thoughts, Jensen took your stale drink, as he claimed, and replaced it with another. No—it can’t be. He said it had coke in it and sodas make a fizz. 

“I won’t ask again, Kitten.” Lloyd pushes and you nod out of fear, knowing that he would find out that you’re lying to him if you said otherwise.

The look on Lloyd’s face shifts into something that makes the hair on the back of your head stand. Like something sinister has possessed him with the way his lips curl in a playful manner. 

A groan leaves Jensen’s lips when Lloyd releases him and you push yourself back against the couch when he goes for you next.

“Lloyd, please—!” you beg as he tucks the knife in his pocket, yanking you from the ground and shoving you forward, planting you firmly in front of Jensen before forcing you to bend over. “Let’s just go home—you already beat him!” You cry, pushing against Jensen’s thighs when Lloyd doesn’t budge and keeps dipping you further.

You feel like you’re going to gag when the metallic stench fills your nose especially with how close you are to your bleeding co-worker and you attempt once more to push away from him, no longer wanting the both of you to suffer. But the world suddenly feels like it’s turning upside down when you feel Lloyd pushing up the skirt of your dress, a grunt leaving his chest when he roughly rips your panties off your thighs.

“Now, don’t be like that, Kitten.” He says in a syrupy tone. “Don’t you want to at least show him his sick fantasy of fucking you?” The tell tale sound of his zipper being undone fills your ears and you’re shocked frozen, scared to the wits end that Lloyd would take you here amongst the dead and in front of your friend who he’s beaten to a pulp.

You look away from Jensen when you feel Lloyd’s cock brush against your ass, his tip teasing your pussy lips. You then shout when Lloyd grabs you by the back of your neck, forcing you to look back at your friend who has one eye swollen shut, while the other is stained with blood and brimming with unshed tears.

In one swift move, Lloyd enters you, gasping for air at his sudden intrusion. Pain blooms at the pit of your stomach when he doesn’t allow your walls to adjust and begins fucking you at a brutal pace, your nails digging into Jensen’s thighs as you try to endure your abuser’s torment. 

Your body jolts against the chair, following Lloyd’s callous thrusts. You’re then washed in humiliation when you hear Chris and Conrad snickering at your sides, seeing them watch you with perverse eyes, sickened to the core as the thought that they enjoy what they are witnessing comes to your mind.

Both men then hold Jensen in place when he starts squirming in his seat that he almost topples over. Lloyd then abruptly pulls you up, pressing your back against his chest but only to grab on the straps of your dress and harshly pull them down from your shoulders, having your breasts spill into the open.

“She’s got perfect tits, doesn’t she, lover boy?” Lloyd taunts as he keeps up the pace of his hips, grabbing your breasts, kneading, squeezing, and pushing them together. “Why don’t you feel how soft they are?” And it’s as if things couldn’t get any worse, Lloyd moves you forward along with him, tipping forward when your knees hit the edge of the seat. His hands grab onto the back of the chair and you wail in horror when he forces your breasts to press against Jensen’s face, the sticky blood smearing all over your skin.

Lloyd laughs and so do his friends and all you feel is shame and disgust at what he’s doing to you—that the man you once loved would hurt you in the sickest way possible.

A gasp is once more wretched from your throat when Lloyd slams hard against your cunt, feeling his thick cock slide even deeper when your walls grow wet, the toe curling sensation from his tip repeatedly hitting that sweet spot of yours trying to take over. You feel like a woman possessed as you grit your teeth, pushing hard against the unwanted pleasure that slowly begins to crawl up your skin and seep into your bones, not wanting to give Lloyd the satisfaction that, despite such circumstances, he still manages to make you feel such a way.

Yet your attempts are deemed fruitless when you whimper and eventually turn into a moaning mess, your body responding to each of Lloyd’s touch; your pussy walls clenching around his throbbing cock with each thrust he makes and how your skin shivers, singing each note in sheer perfection as you climb higher and higher to your peak.

“You see that, nerd? You see how she turns into a fucking slut when you fuck her good?” He goads between heavy breaths, adjusting the position of his legs to have you lean more against his victim, his hands grabbing onto your tits once again only to rub it further against Jensen’s face, feeling the bristles of his goatee rub roughly against your skin. 

“Too bad you’ll never get to have this.”

Lloyd's hips begin moving more erratically, the sound of your skins slapping with one another filling the stolid air. You swallow thickly, refusing for any more moans to leave your lips as you’re slowly enveloped in ecstasy, Lloyd’s cock pulsing deep in your pussy.

A blinding white light suddenly fills your vision and you shake uncontrollably as you come hard around Lloyd’s shaft. Tears once again spring from your eyes and you’re confused about what causes it. Is it embarrassment from feeling the pleasure? Pain from Lloyd’s roughness? Or is it sadness of how the evening of fun turned into a nightmare? You can’t think as you’re dissolved into nothing, your body floating in orgasmic bliss. 

Lloyd follows soon, growling low and animalistic as he keeps his cock buried balls deep, painting your pussy walls with streaks of white as he spills his seed, filling you to the brim.

You think that it’s finally over, that Lloyd’s objective has finally been met. But a life draining gasp then fills your ears—not from you or from Lloyd but from Jensen. And it’s only then that you realize what has happened when you see Lloyd’s hand gripped on the hilt of the knife with the blade stuck deep into Jensen’s chest.

“No!” You cry out as Lloyd stabs him repeatedly, grunts of passionate anger escaping him each time he sinks the blade into the body before you. 

Tears of despair and horror are what fall from your eyes, closing them as you hope that this is all a bad dream. You ball your hands into fists as you try your hardest to close in on yourself, to leave this place of torment that Lloyd has condemned you into. 

Yet, no matter how hard you try, you just can’t. With the sound of metal hitting bone, along with the devious laugh of the men around you and the way your body shakes from Lloyd’s continuous blow, you’re repeatedly pulled back into the present, unwillingly witnessing the murder of your friend. 

You suddenly feel your body shake, your chest tightening that you think the room is losing air and the smell of blood getting stronger and stronger that it makes bile ride up your throat. With Lloyd’s final stab, he pulls you away with him, leaving the knife buried in Jensen’s throat. The world around you suddenly turns, your vision spinning uncontrollably that before you could even let out a scream, everything suddenly goes dark.

You sit inside the employee lounge along with the others in somber idleness. The police came over just before the store opened and ordered that it remained closed for the rest of the day to make way for an investigation. Vince wasn’t happy with the commands of the law enforcers but there’s nothing he could do—there was nothing anybody could do.

A massacre, one of the officers said. A mass murder, another voices, declaring that some of the victims were employees of the store. You already knew who it was—Bucky and Jensen.

One by one, the employees were interrogated, some taking minutes while others taking hours. You glance at Kate who sits across from you on the lunch table, noting the small bruise on the side of her neck. You try not to imagine what Andy told her or did to her that night. You don’t even dare to ask as you refuse to relive the grim evening, nor want to feed her any memory of it.

You sit up once your name is called and you feel the eyes of your other co-workers land on you. The detective, stout and looking somewhat annoyed to be doing such a thing, looks your way and asks your name once more to confirm your identity.

He beckons you to follow him and you do, but not before looking down at your best friend when she grabs your hand, seeing the fear etched in her eyes. You give her a small smile and give her hand a reassuring squeeze before letting her go and following the detective into the other room. 

You do as you’re told when he tells you to sit, staring down at the round table that sits between the both of you as you wait for his first question.

“I’m Detective Bodecker.” He starts, his belly protruding as he leans back against his seat. “And I just want to ask you a few questions regarding your co-workers. Is that okay?”

You nod.

“Do you need some water? Anything to make you comfortable?”

You shake your head.

“Very well. Let’s begin.” He hums and grabs his notebook from the desk, flipping a page. “Where were you on the night of October 31st?”

Your mind suddenly begins reliving the night in question. Jensen’s bloody face and Lloyd’s devious smile playing in your head. You blink those thoughts away, not wanting to give out any information on your face.

Taking a breath, you begin your tale. 

“I was at a party—”

#lloyd hansen #lloyd hansen x reader #dark lloyd hansen #dark!lloyd hansen #lloyd hansen x f!reader #so good so bad #the gray man #chris evans characters #dark fic #horror fic #beanie's freaktober fest #freaktober fest #shadeysprings fics

[exrellian]

Replaced MC AU

I’m pumping this out cuz I’m motivated! Still in third person

TW: the brothers being mean, MC getting bullied-

Part Two!

Everything is Changing

Mammon was the first to fall for Amelia, then Levi, Asmo, and Beel followed quickly

Satan, Lucifer, and Belphie were… weary about the new girl, the three found it odd how quickly their brothers fell for Amelia, seemingly forgetting MC completely

“Hey Beel, Hells Kitchen has a new menu item, it looks delicious! Want to go try it together?”

“Sorry, Amelia and I are going to try it in a couple minutes”

MC shrugged it off, happy Amelia was making friends

“Mammon, I’m bored, wanna go to the casino tonight?”

“Amelia and I are going to watch some movies tonight, no can do human.”

What? MC started to feel weird about this, not really too phased by the fact that the two were hanging out, but the fact that Mammon so nonchalantly called him ‘Human’

“Asmo..? Want to go clubbing tonight?”

“Hm? Not with you, not really. Sorry!”

Oh.

What?

“Levi? Want to play Raft together? I heard a new update came out!”

“I already beat it with Amelia, it was really fun!”

“Oh? Well would you mind playing it with me?”

“Amelia used your account, so we would have to start over for you to really see the update and that would just be boring”

“Oh um… alright, I’ll just play it on my own!”

This went on for about a month before the next brother dropped

“Hey Belphie, do you still have my blanket? It’s kinda cold in my room”

“Oh, I let Amelia have it because she was cold.”

“You gave my blanket to Amelia? Why couldn’t you give her one of yours?”

“She liked yours, don’t be selfish MC, you can just go buy another.”

“Fine.”

MC left, frustrated and still cold.

It was then when the worst so far came to be.

“That will be 18 Grimm”

MC swiped his card and it… declined? That was weird, he had more than enough Grimm! He had a part time job for a while and was payed by Diavolo for hosting events at RAD too! He opened his DDD and checked his account

-143 Grimm

What!?

He puts his DDD away and pays out of pocket for the blanket before returning home in a rush and going to his and Amelia’s room. Luckily for him, Amelia wasn’t there. Grabbing his laptop and checking his bank account he sees a bunch of online purchases on various video games. He slams his computer shut and runs to Leviathans room to see Amelia and Levi playing some random gacha game.

“Are you on my account Amelia?” He tried to keep his voice low and calm but he was shaking

“Oh! I’m sorry MC, Levi said I could!”

“Did you buy anything?”

“Well yeah! I didn’t like your account so I reset it so I could get the characters I wanted! Levi said his card was attached so I could spend as much as I wanted! Wasn’t that so nice of him?”

MC was writhing

“MY card was attached to that! You drained my account completely!”

Amelia looked almost… happy?

“It was your card attached? Sorry MC” leviathans tone was disingenuous and annoyed

“Since it was meant to be your money can you just pay me back for what she spent? I was saving up for something!”

“I’m not giving you my money MC, you need to stop being so selfish. Get out of my room.”

“No! Amelia spent all my money thinking it was yours so clearly you have the money to reimburse me!”

Levi stood up and walked over to MC

“I don’t know what has gotten into you, but you are not the person I fell in love with. You are almost more selfish and self centered than Mammon. First you go bullying Amelia, then you think I have to give you money for a little mistake. Leave my room MC, I don’t want to see you.” The hatred in Leviathans eyes struck a fear into MC that he hasn’t felt since he first arrived in the Devildom, weighing his options, he left, deciding it would be in his best interest to talk to Lucifer about it. He arrived at Lucifer’s study to find it empty, he then checked his room, finding it also empty

MC [Hey Lucifer, are you home?]

Lucifer [I am in a meeting. If you need to talk meet me in my study tomorrow.]

MC [K.]

Tomorrow could not come sooner

#obey me #obey me satan #obey me solomon #obey me angst #obey me x reader #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #obey me simeon #obey me luke #obey me oc #obey me one master to rule them all

[mrsjobarnes]

What’s the worst thing that can happen?

Summary: Jake and you have been secretly together for 5 months, what is the worst that could happen? 

Jake Sersin x Mitchell!Reader

Word count: 1.8 k 

Warning - 18+, Angst, Fluff, Illusion to Smut

Likes, Comments and Reblogs  are welcome!

Please do not steal my work! 

“Hey, baby, I'm pulling into the parking lot now. Are you sure you don’t want to come clean and tell Bradley?”

“Y/n have you lost your mind? Rooster and Maverick would kill me if they found out I was dating you, and I don’t know about you but I’d like to live” you giggled at what Jake had just said.  

“Okay but if they ask I’m not lying anymore,” you said.

“Deal, at least if they kill me I’ll have witness” you can’t help but laugh at the stupidity of your boyfriend

“If they see how happy you make me, they can’t hurt you. That’s the perk of being the only girl but in all seriousness, it doesn’t matter what they think, you’re my boyfriend and I love you. That’s all that matters” you quickly say your goodbyes and lock your car. As you walk into the bar you look around for your bean pole of a brother. After you spot him you walk over. “Hey, guys this is Maverick's daughter and my sister Y/n!” Rooster said. Everybody went around introducing themselves when Coyote aks the million-dollar question

“Soooo are you like adopted or something because you look nothing like Maverick,” he asks. Rooster goes to answer when you cut him off. 

“Am I adopted Bradley, how could you lie to me?” you say, the group goes dead silent. He rolled his eyes, while Jake bites his lip to keep from laughing. “I’m just kidding, yeah I'm adopted,” you say. Everybody lets out a collective sigh and hardy laugh.

“Long time no see,” said Nat while she gave you a bear hug. “Seriously where have you been? '' she asks. 

“Well unlike you guys some of us have regular 9 to 5 jobs,” you say smiling. 

“Y/n you and I both know you don’t work a 9 to 5,” Bradley says. It’s true you don’t, you’re an elementary teacher so you work overtime quite often. 

“Tis true brother, however winter break is around the corner! Thank god, I love kids but some of these crotch goblins are giving me a run for my money” you say with a serious look. Everyone burst into laughter. Nat offers to buy you a round and you graciously accept. The team goes on to talk about things that you could care less about. All you care about is the joy you see on Jake’s face when he gets to talking about something he is passionate about. You know how your brother feels about Jake. they didn’t have an excellent start to their relationship but he saved, your brother, and dad. They are working on building a relationship, which makes you very happy. 

As the night goes on you end up playing pool with Jake, Bob, Nat, and Bradley. You are bending over for your shot when Bradley asks “what the hell happened to your neck and chest Y/N” he asked with a very concerned tone, ready to beat whoever did that to you. 

“Oh this, it’s nothing.” you try to play it off but Nat interjects and tells Bradley that they are hickeys. Your face turns beet red as you tried to think of a way to change the conversation. Jake starts panicking because of the conversation you had in the car. “So has anyone seen the new episode of house of dragons?” a tv show you knew Bradley liked.

“You’re not getting out of this Y/n,” Bradley says with a stoic look on his face. He has always been super protective over you. He thought that if you were seeing someone you’d tell him. To be honest he was a little hurt. 

“Its, not a big deal, I’m seeing this guy and he got carried away. It’s not my fault I’m irresistible. Plus I’m a grown woman and if you think I look bad you should see him” you say. Jake smile remembering how she got those and why it looks like his abs and back were attacked by a cat. “Now can we move on to why you still have a caterpillar on your lip,” you ask. The group erupts in laughter. Pleased with the fact that he gets to live till tomorrow Jake buys the table a round. While he’s at the bar ordering a girl comes up and strikes up a conversation with him. 

“Oh look, hangman found someone already. He was doing so well too, almost 4 months.” Javy said. Everyone lets out a chuckle.  You turn around and see Jake talking to a girl. You try hard to not get jealous because you know he is a good guy. Before anyone else could comment they saw Jake shut down the girl’s advancements and head toward the table with their drinks. “Whoah Hangman are you sick,” Javy asks. 

Jake furrows his brows “No?” he said questioning why Javy would ask that, then it dawned on him. “Oh I just don’t feel like it tonight,” he said. 

“That’s been your excuse a lot recently, are you sure you’re okay” Javy ask genuinely concerned. Jake felt trapped, he could either fess up or keep lying. He looked at you, hoping you could give him an answer. You look at him as if giving an encouraging nod.  He quickly musters up some courage. 

“I am seeing someone” Jake said with a bashful smile. You smiled as well, although it wasn’t the full truth it was a step in the right direction. The group was silent until Bob congratulated him and said it was about time. The group quickly moved conversations to talk about the most recent football game. 

You walked over to Jake and whispered into his ear “Hey do you want to get out of here and come to my place?” He gave an enthusiastic yes and told the group that he was going to head out. 15 minutes later you also bid your goodbyes to the group and raced to your house to meet Jake. 

As you pulled into your driveway and parked Jake hopped out of his car and raced to you feverishly kissing you. Once he was done he put his hand out asking for your keys. Once he had them he threw you over his shoulder giving your ass a nice smack which elected a moan from you.

—

 You are awoken by the sun streaming through your blinds. You turn over and snuggle into Jake’s chest to hide from the sun’s harsh rays. He brings you closer as if that’s possible. “Good morning darling,” he said with his voice thick with sleep and southern charm, you smile and look up at him. 

“Moring,” you say kissing him, he kisses you back like a man starved. You giggle and straddle him and kiss down his neck when you hear the lock to your front door click and a pair of boots stomping around. 

“Y/n, are you up? You are late to brunch” your dad shouts

“Hurry up im starving” shouts Bradley stomping up the stairs. You quickly look at your clock and see that it’s 12:30. You are 30 minutes late to brunch. 

“Shit shit shit” you whisper as you get off of Jake and try to find a shirt. “Uhh give me a second, i'll be right out” you shout. Whispering profanity and telling Jake to get dressed and hide in the bathroom. It’s too late because Bradley opens the door right as Jake is getting out of bed to put his boxers back on. 

“What the fuck” Bradley yells frozen in the doorway, you hear another round of feet coming up the stairs. 

“What is it, Bradley,” your dad asks sounding super concerned. Once he appears at the door and lets out a grone. They both look ready to kill At this point, but the shock has worn off of you. 

“First of all knock”, you say in a stern tone. “Second of all calm down,lets talk about this when I’m fully dressed” shutting the door in their faces. Looking back a Jake you expect him to freak but he doesn’t he just pulls you in for a kiss. 

“It was nice to know you doll,” he says kissing you again. You roll your eyes and put on some PJs. Once you are both dressed you head downstairs into your kitchen. 

As soon as you walk in they start asking questions. You hold your hand up and say “First of all stop yelling, Second would you all like coffee?” you walk towards the coffee maker and turn it on. Jake stands at the door looking ready to run if they come after him. As the coffee starts to brew you go about making your cup while Bradley and your dad just stare at you knowing not to mess with you until you’ve had a cup. As soon as you’ve taken your first sip they start bum-barding you with questions. “Okay let me start from the beginning you say” walking over to the table and grabbing Jake along the way, as you all sit down. “Jake and I met at the Hard deck 5 months ago, he was very kind and not like how you all described him,” you say looking at Bradley. 

“YOU’VE BEEN DATING FOR 5 MONTHS” Bradley stands and shouts. You give him a look that screams ‘shut the fuck up’ he quietly sits back down and you continue explaining the ins and out of your relationship. Once you are done you all sit in silence while the two men across from you process this new information. “I still don’t like this,” said Bradley. You kick him under the table and glare. 

“I don’t care if you like it, it's my life and I can date who I want,” you say looking at Jake with doe eyes. Bradley just glares at Jake 

“Does he make you happy,” your dad asks. You shake your head yes. “Then that’s all I can ask for, but I swear Jake if you hurt my baby I will kill you,” he said. 

“Yes sir,” Jake said. “She is honestly the best thing that has ever happened to me. I love her and would do anything for her.” He said kissing your forehead. You look up at him and snuggle into him. 

“Okay, then that’s all I can ask as a father,” Maverick said sincerely. You smile at your dad and then look at Bradley. 

“I'm not happy that you kept this from me, however, if you are happy then I'm happy. Just keep the PDA to a minimum please,” he said with a small smile on his face. “I'm going to text the group that you don’t have an STI,” he said looking at Jake. 

“What,” the group said collectively. Bradley explained that when Jake stopped sleeping with a new girl every night, the team got concerned and Bob suggested that he may have gotten an incurable STI. They all burst into laughter. 

“Well, why don’t you two get dressed? We can go get food, I'm still hungry and I know Bradley is probably dying” said Maverick, you and Jake agreed and went to get ready. 

“See that didn’t go that bad,” you said, handing Jake some clothes. 

“Wait till they find out that I’m moving In,” he said, kissing your neck.

#jake seresin x reader #jake hangman seresin smut #jake seresin x you #jake hangman x reader #hangman seresin x reader #hangman top gun #hangman x reader #hangman imagine #jake hangman x you #jake seresin imagine #top gun #top gun maverick #dagger squad #pete maverick mitchell #rooster bradshaw fic #bradley rooster bradshaw #jake hangman seresin

[arisewanekosuki]

You heard someone calling your name. When you turned around, you saw Kabukimono running towards you, he was wearing different clothes from his regular silky ones. Not only that but he and his clothes were very dirty. -“Kabu-chan?! What happened?!” you asked, already taking your handkerchief  to scrub the dirt from his face. -“(Y/n)! Today Nagamasa-san teached me how to use sword! From now on I’ll be able to protect you and others!” Kabukimono looked so proud of himself, his face was adorned with big smile. “I still have to train everyday and I wanted to ask…” his cheeks became slightly red. “..Would you… would you come sometimes to watch my training?” He was avoiding eye contact with you and you couldn’t help but think how adorable he looked right now. -”Of course I will! Tomorrow, when I finish my work, I’ll came to watch you, alright?” You smiled to him, scrubbing the last dirt from his lovely face. The boy nodded, feeling very happy, he can’t really wait to impress you tomorrow. His smile grew wider and you couldn't help but think about kissing him on the cheek and you did. You kissed his right cheek and suddenly you realize what you did and took step back from him. -“I’m so sorry, Kabu-chan! I don’t know why I… Did I make you uncomfortable?” you asked, watching him as he placed his hand on cheek that you kissed. He never felt this way before but it wasn’t a bad feeling, no, he was feeling so warm inside. -“What was it?” he asked, he was surprised but at the same time he felt excitement. -“Um..that was a kiss-” -“Can you do that again?” you were shocked with his bold request but then smiled and kissed his another cheek, then forehead and then the nose. The puppet’s face blushed, it was his first time to feel being loved like that by another person.

 The 6th Harbinger was lying on the lab table. You were terrified of what The Doctor did to his fellow comrade. -“I know this is not your job but clean this mess. I lost my last assistant  and you..hm.. you don’t really have anything better to do anyway, right?” Dottore grinned. -“Lord Dottore but what should I do with-“ -“Just leave him be, his flesh and skin will regenerate itself.” With that said, the 2nd Harbinger left you with unconscious Scaramouche in the room. You do have work, there are still soldiers that you have to take care of, but you can’t refuse a Harbinger command, after all you’re just a healer. -“How cruel…” you only heard rumors of sick things the 2nd Harbinger have done to his assistants and agents but until now, you didn't truly believed the rumors. How can anyone treat living beings like this?! The first thing you did, was to take chains off from Scaramouche’s wrists, not caring about substance, that looked almost like blood on table and floor. Suddenly he grabbed your wrist, he was now looking at you. -“Do…t… to….me..” You couldn't understand what he was saying. -“Lord Balladeer, please forgive me, I just wanted to take off this from Lord’s wrists.” He let you go, you were not sure if he did that to let you take them off or because he didn't have strength left. You took the chains off, then you looked at him, his eyes were so empty. -“ Lord Balladeer, maybe at least I should-“ -“k..t…e..” he whispered. -“I’m truly sorry Lord but I couldn’t hear you.” His eyes met yours. -“Don..t… lo…ok… at…me…” You didn’t know what to do. Normal human wouldn’t be able to survive whatever the Doctor did to him. You couldn’t just leave him like this, but what can you do for him? He is in such bad state that you can see clearly the lack of heart in his chest. -“Hu..rts…e…ve..ry….thi…g….hu..s..” he mumbled. -“…” you took his hand in yours, he jolted for second from sudden touch but didn't take his hand from yours. “I will stay with you my Lord, until you recover. I’m truly sorry, that I can’t take your pain away but if there’s anything I can do for you, just tell me.” He didn't reply. You wondered if he lost consciousness again. You placed delicate kiss on his hand, the tears flowed from his eyes. For the first time he felt a bit of warmth in this cold nation.

-“Oh isn’t it Hat Guy? Hello!” you smiled to Wanderer, who grimaced after hearing you call him by that ‘name’ too. -“Why are you calling me like that?” -“Hm? You’re the one who went with that name on The Akademiya Extravaganza, aren’t you?” you tilted your head, confused why he seems to be angry for calling him that. -“It was-- … never mind. Just don’t call me that.” He said, not looking at you. You smiled coming to him closer. -“So…do you have any plans for today?” -“Hmpf, I know this is not what you really wanted to ask me. Just tell me already what you want.” -“Okay! Okay! Remember those students that dragged us to their cooking interest group? I’m going to join them again! Would you like to jo-“ -“No.” Wanderer said, turning around like he’s ready to just leave you. You caught his sleeve. -“Don't be like that! You’re really good at cooking! And it was fun to co-“ -“You didn’t cook anything, I was the one who made all the dishes.” He interrupted you again, still with his back turned toward you. -“Stop interrupting me-!” you pouted, puffing your cheeks. -“Just deal with it.” He smirked -“Why you! Please! I love your cooking! The food you made was so delicious! Please!! I want to eat it again! Please!” now you were holding onto his arm. The puppet sighed, he can’t believe that for some reason he doesn’t mind when you touch him.   -“Consider yourself lucky, that I don’t have anything better to do.” -“So you mean-“ -“Let’s just go.” He started walking. You smiled, glad that you can spend some more time with him. You ran in front of him, stopping him in his track. -“I knew it that you’re not that bad!” -“You’re naive if you think that I-“ before he could finish his sentence you kissed his cheek. Then you just smiled and ran off screaming -“I’m going to eat Hat Guy's delicious dishes again!” Wanderer was stunned, then he put his hand on his red cheek you kissed, he was feeling warm. He quickly noticed that you already left Sumeru City. -“That idiot…” he smiled and he ran after you.

--- I really want to shower the little meow meow with kisses (๑•̑з•̑๑)੭ु⁾⁾

#Genshin Impact x Reader #Genshin x Reader #Kabukimono x Reader #Kunikuzushi x Reader #Scaramouche x Reader #Wanderer x Reader #genshin impact x you #my stuff #my short things

[lesgetittkookie]

redamancy - jjk (part iii)

⤖ genre: fluff, future smut, angst, gardener!jeongguk x rich!reader, okay but jeongguk isn't really a gardener like that but you'll see, kinda slow burn but not really

⤖ pairing: jeongguk x female reader

⤖ rating: 18+

⤖word count: approx. 14.1 k words

⤖ chapter warnings: explicit language, angst

summary: jeongguk is just a normal dude with a simple routine. wake up, go to the gym, work his job as a waiter at this posh upscale restaurant in the heart of gangnam before coming home to a night full of video games and ramen (it's delicious and cheap). that routine gets disrupted when he accidentally taps the back of an expensive sports car of one of the richest men in south korea. considering he's broke, he couldn't afford to pay for the damages so the man makes a deal with him by offering him to work at his house as one of the gardeners. jeongguk takes it but wasn't prepared to meet this beautiful young woman who's constantly lounging by the pool, you, the rich man's daughter.

author's note: hi hi hi pls don't kill me yall. i know it's been MONTHS since i last posted. there were many life changing events that occurred in my life and it really held me back from ever completing part 3. i had half of it written in august but it was left abandoned for a while because of my college semester. i also lost motivation to write for so long too. im gonna be honest, i hate this chapter. no matter what i wrote, i was not happy with it at all and im still not. but i didn't wanna keep you guys waiting. the only thing i ask from you is that if you can really give me feedback and thoughts on the chapter, it would be really helpful. seeing you guys enjoy it keeps me motivated to continue writing, the more motivated i am, the sooner i can post future parts. im on summer break so i would really like to finish this story if possible. pls don't be a silent reader. i hope you guys like this chapter. xx M.

taglist:@janedukiesworld@rjsmochii@mwitsmejk@jjeonjjk7@whoa-jo @linda-botello @dewamused @tearsdntfall617 @taehyungseggs @thoudailydeets @hobiiihope @miss-jupiter @petalsofink @imjustreadingig @guksunshine @iheartsvt @rainnyrh @axniyx @kookies-n-spice @carolsummerlove @rievjjks @dopedreamfireparty @

“You’re going to what?” Jeongguk asks, almost dropping the garden snippers on his foot. 

Dohyun jumps a little at the older man’s loud voice, almost dropping the flower bouquet. He dusts off his white button-up, fixing the collar. 

“I’m going to ask Y/N on a date,” He reiterates proudly. “I got her these chocolates from that fancy chocolate store,” He holds up the white box wrapped in a baby pink bow. “And some roses from my aunt’s flower shop.” His other hand props up the bouquet, plastic rustling when he shakes it. 

No way. There’s no way he’s actually going to ask you. Not when you literally just said last night that you don’t have any form of feelings for Dohyun. But you also did mention that you wouldn’t have the heart to turn him down, not wanting to see him hurt. 

God, why did you have to be so nice? Are you actually going to accept the date when Dohyun asks you? 

He looks at Dohyun who seems to be in a daze, probably daydreaming about you and him together. He shivers at the thought of you kissing Dohyun on the corner of his mouth as you did with Jeongguk last night. 

Gross. 

There’s no way you’re going on that date with Dohyun. Not when you’ve made it clear that you’re interested in Jeongguk. If that kiss didn’t mean anything last night, he’d be quite upset. 

“Uh…I don’t know if that’s…a good idea,” Jeongguk replies, voice honeyed. He’d be damned if he lets Dohyun ask you out first. 

The excited smile begins to fade, forming a firm line. He looks at Jeongguk in confusion, “Why?” He asks. 

Fuck, what can he say? There’s no excuse coming to mind. 

“Listen, dude,” Jeongguk walks up to Dohyun, putting his arm around the younger man’s shoulder. “Girls like Y/N, they’re not interested in guys like us.” 

Is he gonna go to hell for lying like this? 

“Guys like…us?” Dohyun questions, looking up at Jeongguk with a clueless pout. 

Jeongguk nods, pretending to look sullen, “Yeah, I mean look at us, we’re just a bunch of commoners,” Something you’ve made very apparent that you don’t care about. “Y/N’s family…they’re rich. She’s probably into guys who own sports cars and Rolex watches.” Lies. You’ve mentioned how you couldn’t stand materialistic guys. 

“So what you’re saying is…” Dohyun stares at the grass thoughtfully, “That I need to have nice and expensive things.” Jeongguk nods in response. 

Yeah, he’s definitely going to hell. 

“B-But I made reservations at that expensive French restaurant,” He tells Jeongguk, looking a little sad. 

Lame. Going to a fancy wine-and-dine restaurant for a date would not impress you, he thinks. You already seem to be sick of your high-class lifestyle. The last thing you would want is to be sitting in a place surrounded by other rich folks.

If it were up to Jeongguk, he would’ve taken you to his favorite street vendor for some tteokbokki and then to the arcade to play games. He thinks you’d enjoy that more. 

“It’s okay man. That wouldn’t have been enough,” Jeongguk shakes his head, putting a hand on the other’s shoulder in a comforting manner,  “She probably would’ve ordered the most expensive wine on the menu.” 

Dohyun’s bottom lip quivers and a look of despair etched onto his face. “I would’ve paid for it.” 

Jeongguk raises an eyebrow, “You could afford that?” 

Dohyun shrugs, “I made a deal with the manager to pay in installments.” Geez, he really had it all planned out. 

“I don’t think she’s worth it, dude,” Jeongguk’s voice is laced with fake sorrow. He hopes you never find out that he’s saying this shit because he does not mean a single damn thing he just told Dohyun. 

“I mean I guess you’re right,” Dohyun looks down at the flower bouquet with a dejected look on his face. “She’s just always been so nice to me so I thought there might’ve been something there.” 

You are a nice person. So nice that it shook Jeongguk to the core. There wasn’t a single bad body in your body it seems. You would never have any ill intentions towards anyone. He’s witnessed it firsthand. You’re damn considerate of others that you were afraid of facing the day Dohyun confessed to you because you didn’t have it in you to turn him down and witness his heartbreak.

If anything, Jeongguk is doing both you and Dohyun a favor. 

“I hear you, buddy,” Jeongguk clasps his hand against Dohyun’s back, making the younger man wince a little. “Guys like us never get the girl.” 

Except for Jeongguk. He thinks he might have a chance.

Too arrogant? 

“I guess I’ll just cancel the reservation,” Dohyun states in melancholy, and Jeongguk immediately nods.

Yes, cancel the reservation. Please. Cancel so Jeongguk can ask you out on a date instead. 

“Well I’m going to go put this stuff back,” Jeongguk tells him, putting the tools away in the bucket. He’s also hoping to catch you sitting outside again. He wonders what swimsuit you’re wearing today. 

“I’ll go with you,” Dohyun mumbles, walking alongside Jeongguk. 

God dammit, never mind, he prays you’re not sitting outside. 

The two men are heading towards the back along the concrete pathway, stopping in front of the shed. Jeongguk looks over at the sunbed where you’re usually sitting but fortunately, you’re not there. His shoulders relax at that and he lets out a sigh of relief. He can’t help but look over at Dohyun, only to see him already staring at the sunbed as well with a gloomy look on his face. 

“Come on, help me put these tools where they need to go,” Jeongguk suggests in an attempt to distract the younger man. He’s not going to lie, he does feel a little guilty for lying like this to him. 

Jeongguk is never the type to really feel guilty which is why his Jin Hyung calls him a dickhead sometimes. But right now, he can feel it just a tad bit. 

Dohyun glances over at the sunbed one last time before hesitantly following Jeongguk inside, placing the bouquet and box of chocolates onto the wooden table. He takes out the tools one by one, placing them onto the hooks. Jeongguk just watches the other, noticing how his frown isn’t going away, eyebrows furrowed. 

Once the tools are placed in their respective places, the two of them head back outside. Dohyun leaves first and Jeongguk follows behind only to bump into the other male’s back when he pauses in his footsteps. He clicks his tongue, looking up at Dohyun only to find him staring longingly at something a few feet away. 

Oh god, please don’t let it be. 

He turns his head and there you are, walking outside of the house in your swimming attire. There’s a book in your hand as per usual and it sounds like you’re humming to a certain tune, earbuds on. 

Jeongguk finds himself panicking, ready to steer Dohyun away from the back but it’s too late. 

“You know what, I’m still gonna tell her,” Dohyun says determinedly. “I’m still gonna ask her out on that date.” He’s got to be joking. “I’m gonna ask her out on that date and then tell her I’ve been in love with her since we were kids.”  Before Jeongguk could respond, Dohyun is already striding over to you, chocolate and flowers in hand. 

This is not going to end well. 

+

It’s a beautiful day out, you think. The sky is a bright blue, the sun is out and shining high, the garden is looking colorful and vibrant with the newly planted flowers and there’s a nice breeze blowing through the air. You have a smile on your face as you think about all the things that happened yesterday. 

The way Jeongguk kept making you laugh obnoxiously and smile like a fool. He’s unintentionally funny because he’s so honest and blunt. He wouldn’t even try hard to make you laugh, he would just say something casually and actually be serious about it when you think he’s joking. You hope that you can see him again outside of your house soon. 

You haven’t seen him yet and you’re hoping he hasn’t left yet. At least not without saying bye to you. Not that he has to but it be nice if he did. 

You’re listening to music when you walk outside of the house into the backyard, book in hand, ready to begin your reading for the day. You plan to read just for a little bit, drinking a glass of red wine while you wait for Jeongguk to come to the back. 

Luckily, your mother isn’t home, having gone to her company’s building after finding out about some setbacks with the clothing material for her latest fashion line. You have no idea what it was exactly but she was definitely stressed out about it. 

Plopping down onto the lounger, you open your book to the page you bookmarked before picking up your wine glass to take a sip. Before you can bring the glass up to your lips, you hear your name being called by a ringing voice. 

You flinch, almost spilling the wine on your thigh, and look up to see Dohyun striding towards you, a look of determination on his face. In his hands, he’s holding a bouquet of roses and a box of chocolates. 

Oh god. You were afraid of when this day would come. 

You set down the glass on the circular glass table beside you, closing the book as well. Mustering up your best (fake) smile, you greet him, “Hey,” You clear your throat, “Um you look nice.” 

The compliment immediately brings a bashful smile to his face as he looks down at the ground before looking at you once again. “Thank you,” He responds. 

“Mhm,” You clear your throat, awkwardly looking away. 

God, you were nervous. You already told Jeongguk you were never prepared for the moment when Dohyun was going to ask you out. You always hoped for him to eventually lose feelings and let you go. However, here he is, standing in front of you dressed in nice clothes while holding a flower bouquet. 

You felt like you were going to be sick.

“So I uh,” Dohyun lets out a deep breath. “I was wondering if you would,” No please no. “Sorry,” He shakes his head at himself. “I had a whole speech prepared but now I can’t seem to remember anything,” He tells you and a fake laugh escapes your lips. 

If he can just get nervous and maybe back out…

“Iwaswonderingifyoudliketogoonadatewithme,” He says it so fast that you almost miss it but you knew exactly what he just asked you. 

Your throat feels tight, eyes just staring at him in surprise. What do you say? How can you tell him no? Not when he’s staring at you with those hopeful eyes, hands clutching the bouquet and chocolates. 

How can you go on a date with someone else when you have a crush on Jeongguk? A major crush. Though you don’t know him very well, you know enough to like him. A lot. But maybe he doesn’t like you. He’s still a mystery to you. He’s made it clear that he finds you attractive but what if to him this is just some sort of little game to him? 

After all, he is only working here temporarily. He could just be trying to get into your pants and then disappear right after he gets what he wants. You don’t know. He genuinely seemed interested in having a conversation with you last night but at the same time, it could just be an act. 

“Um Y/N?” Dohyun’s call of your name causes you to snap out of your doubtful thoughts and look up at him. 

“Yes?” You say in surprise. 

“Wait, that's a yes?” An excited smile grows on his face. 

Oh fuck. That’s not what you meant. The smile on his face…how can you say no now? 

Letting out a regretful sigh, you gather a fake smile on your face. “Yes,” You can’t believe you’re doing this. “I’ll go on a date with you.” With those words leaving your lips, your eyes immediately snap to Jeongguk who you didn’t realize was standing a few feet away from you both. 

The look on his face causes your heart to drop into your stomach. 

Did he just witness you say yes to the date? 

Your eyes don’t look away from him, a guilty expression on your face as you stare at his now blank face. It went from surprise to blank in a matter of seconds, a way of showing you that he looks unbothered by what just happened. 

Maybe he is unbothered by it. 

If he isn’t, then he’s doing a great job at not showing it. 

You didn’t mean to say yes. In fact, you were ready to say no. But with the excited look on his face, you don’t have it in you to take it away. You just have to come clean later. You can’t get this far. 

Not when you know you can’t reciprocate your feelings for the man. 

“I’m so glad you said yes!” His smile is vibrant and it looks like he can’t contain his excitement, bouncing on his tiptoes. 

With a tight-lipped smile, you accept the bouquet of red roses he hands you along with the chocolates. Your eyes glance behind him again towards where Jeongguk is standing. He gives you a thumbs-up and a pursed-lip smile before heading towards the gate. 

You open your mouth to say something but Dohyun speaks before any words can escape you, your attention turning back towards him again. 

“So I can pick you up on Friday? How does 7 sound?” He asks you, voice sounding thrilled. 

The more you hear him speak, the worse you feel. There’s no backing out of this now. Jeongguk left without saying anything which causes you to question how he might’ve felt. Maybe he did like you back. Or maybe he just doesn’t care. 

Again, you don’t know. 

The overwhelming feeling of all kinds of emotions fills you and you just wish to disappear but instead, you just give Dohyun another fake smile and say, “Sounds good.” 

“Great!” He grins. “I’ll see you Friday!” He says before turning on his feet and leaving. You watch him walk towards the gate, no longer containing his excitement when you hear him whisper yes yes yes. 

“Jeongguk! Wait up!” You hear Dohyun shout, eagerness, and enthusiasm loud in his tone. 

You wince, looking towards the gate in hopes of catching a glimpse of Jeongguk but you fail to see him at all. He didn’t bother to come to the back and say. But you can probably understand why. You let out a sad sigh, holding up the bouquet of flowers in your hand and staring at them. 

Just one date. You just have to get through this one date. 

+ 

Friday evening 

The feeling of dread swirls in your stomach as you stare into the mirror with your hair and face ready for the date you’re about to go on. You’re not looking forward to it at all. Ever since you woke up this morning, you thought about coming up with some sort of excuse to back out of the date. Maybe lie and say you have the stomach flu or something. 

Then again, if you lie, you would just be postponing the date because you have a feeling he would reschedule it for another day. So you thought to yourself that it would be better to get it over with. 

Your plan is to go on the date, eat and then tell him that you don’t have any feelings for him. You know that if you lead him on further, it will end with a more painful heartbreak for him.

You’re also bummed because, for the remainder of the week, you did not see Jeongguk at all. Even when you sat down at the pool all day, constantly looking over at the door in hopes of catching sight of him, he didn’t come towards the back. 

Instead of Jeongguk coming to the shed to drop off the tools, it would either be some other gardener or sometimes even Dohyun who, of course, would wave at you excitedly and remind you about the time of your date on Friday. 

You think he might be disappointed in you and doesn’t want to see you. Or maybe he backed off because he probably thinks you’re giving Dohyun a chance when you’re not. 

You just fucked up by saying yes. 

After telling Dohyun that you don’t have feelings for him, you’re determined to tell Jeongguk you like him when you see him on Monday. And if he doesn’t like you back? 

Well then you’re just going to hide in your room in embarrassment until he finishes working his last few days at your estate

You’re wearing a black long-sleeved dress that has a square-shaped neckline and slightly ruffled sleeves. It reaches below your knees, a slit on the left side, revealing the skin up to your midthigh. You left your hair open in soft curls and your makeup is done minimally. 

You’re putting on your dangly earring when you hear your phone vibrate on the vanity. The screen lights up with a text from Dohyun telling you he’s out front waiting for you. You exhale deeply, attempting to calm yourself down, feeling slightly sick in the stomach. 

Just two hours. You just have to endure this date for two hours. 

Fixing the loose strand of hair in your face, you look into the mirror one last time before grabbing your clutch and walking out of the bedroom and down the spiral steps. You nod your head at one of the maids on your way out, giving her a polite smile. 

When you walk outside of your house, you see Dohyun waiting in front of the gate with another bouquet of flowers. He cleaned himself nicely, wearing a white button-up under a black blazer with matching pants. His hair is pushed back and he’s not wearing those glasses again. 

With an elated grin, he gives you a bow which you return before grabbing the flowers he holds out and muttering a small ‘thanks’ in response. 

He nods, seeming proud of himself before he holds out his hand which you hesitantly take. He walks you to his car, a red Toyota Corolla, opening the door for you politely. 

Your mind can’t help but wonder when you went out with Jeongguk that night at the bar and he told you that chivalry was dead so he wouldn’t open the door for you. You can’t help but smile at the memory, shaking your head. 

Once you’re sitting down in the car, bouquet in your lap along with your clutch, he gently closes the door before jogging towards the driver's side to sit down. His face is beaming when he starts the car again, the sound of a girl group song immediately playing on the Bluetooth loudly, causing you to wince at the volume. 

He looks panicked, cheeks and ears red as he quickly turns down the volume dial on the knob and mumbles a shy ‘sorry. You give him a reassuring smile before looking out of the window.

The car begins moving, an awkward silence immediately filling the air since neither of you say a single word. Dohyun is the first to break it, clearing his throat before speaking. 

“So how was your day?” He asks, attempting to make conversation. 

You shrug, watching outside as he drives out of your neighborhood towards the city. “It was okay. Didn’t really do much.” 

Other than hoping and praying for the date to be canceled one way or another. 

He nods, tapping his index fingers against the steering wheel as he says, “Cool cool. I didn’t do much either.” You nod, listening. “Well actually, I started this new Korean drama. It’s about this guy who…” 

He rambles about the drama, beginning from the first episode and providing you with details on how it all started, and for almost the majority of the car ride, he’s giving you a rundown on how each episode goes down one by one along with his personal opinions. You just nod and add in a few words to make yourself sound interested when really, all you wanted to do was open the car door and roll down the street. 

Unable to help yourself, your mind drifts to the time you were with Jeongguk and how you two talked about the most random things. He would tell you crazy stories about the things he’s done with his friends, always having something ridiculous to say which would make you laugh a crazy amount. 

Again, Jeongguk is blunt and careless about what he says and who he says it to. He never held back from telling you things that might sound absurd to others. 

For this one time when he and his six other friends had a competition on who can eat the most gamja hot dogs at a carnival before they all went on one of those spinning rides and ended up vomiting while the ride was still going. The whole ride had to immediately shut down and people who were waiting in line were not happy and covered in their puke. 

To make the night even worse, his friend Jin almost fought a little kid over the last alpaca plushie at one of the games and it resulted in them being kicked out of the carnival. 

The whole time he had told you that story, he had a smile on his face at the memories and you remember being enraptured by how beautiful he looked with his bunny teeth on display, the small mole beneath his rose-colored lips visible; the hand gestures he’d make to animate the story. 

You don’t realize you’re smiling again until Dohyun calls for your name, causing you to flinch in surprise. 

“Yeah?” You ask, smile dropping and you look at him questioningly. 

“I was um asking what you thought about it?” He wonders, glancing at you before looking back at the road. 

Fuck, what did he ask about? 

“I’m sorry,” You shake your head. “Can you repeat the question?” You look at him apologetically, mentally cursing at yourself for being distracted by Jeongguk again. 

Dohyun clears his throat, “I was asking what your thoughts were on the show so far.” 

Oh right, the show. The one you didn’t listen to a single thing about. God, you don’t know what to say. 

Think, Y/N, think. 

“It sounds…” You’re looking for the right word. “Like there’s a lot going on.” You slightly wince at that, hoping he doesn’t notice. 

Dohyun looks a bit confused, pursing his lips in thought before saying, “Really? I don’t know. I honestly think it’s quite boring. There’s no good drama going on with the characters.” He says and you nod. 

“Honestly you’re right,” You quickly add. “I don’t know what I was thinking,” You let out a fake chuckle. “It needs to be more dramatic.” 

You have no fucking clue what you’re saying. 

Seeming to be satisfied with the answer, he nods with a smile before moving on to a different topic. 

For the rest of the car ride, you try really hard to give him your full attention when he talks, chipping in on things when appropriate up until you guys reach the restaurant. You let out a slightly annoyed sigh under your breath when the restaurant comes into view. 

Pierre Gagnaire à Séoul. 

The French restaurant your mother absolutely loves meanwhile you hate. The food is not bad but it’s not to your taste. You’re also not a fan of the environment, surrounded by all the posh and stuck-up rich people. 

The restaurant has valet parking as well so when you guys pull up to the front, Dohyun quickly opens the door and runs to your side so he can open your own door for you, holding his hand out for you to take. 

You try not to think about how Jeongguk would probably tell you to open the door yourself because he wouldn’t do it for you. 

He hands his keys over to the valet before you both head inside, his hand holding yours. You try not to squirm when he tries to intertwine your fingers, letting out a breath to try and relax. 

He opens the door for you, allowing you to go in first and you give him a thank you before walking inside first, internally grateful that your hands are no longer clasped together.

The aromatic smell of the food immediately hits your nose. The sound of chatter fills your ears along with the utensils hitting against the plates. The sight you see with your eyes is one you are used to. Wealthy people dressed to the nines in their extravagant dresses and suits, sipping on expensive wine. 

“Good evening,” The hostess at the front greets with a practiced smile. “Reservation?” 

Dohyun nods excitedly, “Dohyun at 7:30.” He tells her and she nods, looking at the screen before grabbing two menus from beside her and nudging her head towards the tables. 

“Follow me please,” She says, Dohyun letting you go first before he follows behind you. You walk past other people, avoiding making eye contact with anyone you know. 

This restaurant is where all of the affluent people go, friends of your family that your parents are close to. You wouldn’t be surprised if you saw any of them here though you’d much rather not which is why you just stare at the hostess’ back as she guides you both towards your table. 

Dohyun pulls the chair back for you as soon as you reach the table before he sits himself down. The hostess places the menus down on the table before saying, “Your waiter should be here shortly.” And with that, she leaves. 

“I’ve never been here before so I’m excited,” Dohyun says, flipping through the menu with stars in his eyes.

You shrug, pretending to look through the menu though not really because you already know what you’re going to choose. “I’ve been a few times,” You inform him. 

“Oh,” He looks at you. “Do you like it?” He looks nervous when he waits for your response. 

You give him a pursed-lip smile and say, “Yeah,” You lie. “I like it.” 

He grins, seeming satisfied with the answer before looking at the menu again. You look down at your own menu again in order to distract yourself, waiting for him to decide what he wants to eat. 

“Good evening, my name is Jeongguk and I’ll be your waiter this evening.” As soon as you hear that husky yet gentle voice, your head snaps up to the person and the menu drops onto the table out of surprise. 

And there he is, standing in front of you wearing black slacks that accentuate his strong thighs while he wears a white button-up that hugs his chest. The sleeves are pulled up a bit, his inked arms slightly peaking out. His dark hair is pushed back to reveal his eyebrow piercing and strong brows, a single loose strand slightly falling forward on his forehead. 

His large doe brown eyes meet yours, shock evident on his face as he stares right back at you.  

“Holy shoot Jeongguk!” Dohyun sounds just as surprised as you look before a large smile overtakes his face. 

+

Jeongguk had no fucking idea that this was the fancy wine and dine restaurant Dohyun was going to take you to for the date.

The whole week Dohyun wouldn’t shut up about it and he didn’t bother asking the younger man which restaurant it was. He wasn’t interested in knowing because quite frankly, he tried not to care. 

To say that he was disappointed when you said yes to Dohyun would be an understatement. He knew you were too nice and didn’t want to hurt the guy but he really thought you’d muster up the courage to turn him down. 

Instead, he watched you say yes and take the flowers and chocolates from Dohyun with that pretty smile on your face. 

Now Jeongguk usually isn’t the type to get jealous. But that’s usually because there’s no one he’s really been interested in. Sure, he’s had a few girlfriends here and there but the relationships don’t last long enough because the girl either ends up batshit crazy or he just couldn’t return the same feelings. 

But seeing Dohyun all excited and happy about taking you out on a date would just piss him off. He wanted to be the one to take you out. He thinks his plan would’ve been more solid and fun. Taking you out to the arcade before eating at his favorite fried chicken spot with beer.

Jeongguk can’t deny that he holds these strong feelings of infatuation towards you. You interest him because you’re different. Sure, it might sound like those typical cliche things but he’s speaking the truth. You’re intelligent, funny, and so fucking kind to others. Let’s not also forget how immensely beautiful you are. 

Yeah, he’s got a gigantic crush on you. 

Too bad he’s standing in front of you as your waiter and not as the date sitting across from you. He can’t seem to take his eyes off of you right now. Taking in your wide eyes and slightly ajar mouth, he tries not to act just as surprised by keeping a blank stare. 

“Oh wow, didn’t expect to see you guys here,” Jeongguk says, voice flat and void of any emotion. 

Before you can say anything, Dohyun says, “Jeongguk, I didn't know you worked here!” Jeongguk tries not to wince at Dohyun’s loud enthusiastic voice. 

“Yeah,” Jeongguk clears his throat, giving his full attention to Dohyun so he doesn’t stare at you. “Usually the evening shifts now since you know…I work at the other place.” He informs him. 

Dohyun nods, “Cool cool.” He looks across at you. “Isn’t it funny how Jeongguk is our waiter, Y/N?” 

Jeongguk looks at you who’s just looking at Dohyun before glancing at him, “Yeah, it’s pretty crazy.” Your voice is shy of speaking and he thinks it's because of him. He holds eye contact with you, taking in the small pout on your glossy lips. There’s a certain emotion in your eye, almost looking apologetic but Jeongguk tries to brush it off. 

“Anyways, what would you guys like to start off with? Something to drink maybe?” Jeongguk asks, pulling out a pen and his notepad. 

Don’t fucking look at Y/N, Jeongguk. 

Dohyun looks at you first with a questioning gaze, “Y/N?” 

You clear your throat as you shut the menu, “I’ll just have water.” Jeongguk nods before looking at Dohyun. 

“I’ll also have water,” The younger man smiles at Y/N. 

Why the fuck is this guy always smiling? Jeongguk wonders. 

And why the fuck are they both just ordering water? If Jeongguk were you, he’d be ordering the overpriced wines for the hell of it. Maybe just maybe…he can make this date a bit more entertaining for himself. 

Jeongguk stands straighter and then looks at Dohyun, “Are you sure you guys don’t want to try the red wine? It’s Pinot Noir. A classic.” 

Dohyun’s eyes widen for a second before they glance at you and then back to Jeongguk. Jeongguk looks at Dohyun and secretly winks, almost as a way of communicating to the younger man that this is going to impress you.

Jeongguk knows it won’t but he’s bored and sad. Sue him. 

Dohyun nods rapidly and says, “We’ll have some of that as well.” 

Before Jeongguk can say anything, you cut in by saying, “Are you sure about that? It’s quite expensive, Dohyun.” You’re looking at him in concern, pointing a manicured nail at the price of the wine on the menu. 

Dohyun just shakes his head and tries to wave it off, “Don’t worry, Y/N. I can afford it. Order whatever you want.” 

You purse your lips, not saying anything else. Your eyes shift to Jeongguk slightly squinting at him almost in suspicion but he just shrugs, turning around to walk away. 

Is Jeongguk going to look like an asshole for trying to sabotage this date? Probably. Does he care? Not really. He’s trying to save your ass before Dohyun confesses to you. He needs to make sure that doesn’t happen otherwise you’re going to end up lying and telling the man that you like him back when Jeongguk knows damn well you don’t.

Though Jeongguk only really hung out with you once, he knows enough to say that you will feel extremely guilty for hurting someone else’s feelings. You’ve proven that just by going on this date with Dohyun regardless of the fact that you don’t hold any feelings for the guy. You just didn’t want to turn him down because you knew he’d be heartbroken. 

Jeongguk is not going to let you accept Dohyun’s confession. Not when Jeongguk likes you and you like him. At least he thinks you like him because if that kiss on the corner of his mouth didn’t mean anything he doesn’t know what the fuck that meant. 

Surely you weren’t leading him on. Or maybe that’s how you say goodbye to your friends? 

Wait, but then again you don’t have friends. 

This shit is going to give Jeongguk a headache. By the end of this date, if it doesn’t turn into a complete disaster, Jeongguk is going to stop being a pussy and say something. He doesn’t exactly know what yet. But something. 

Pouring the wine into the fancy glasses, he puts them on a tray and brings them back out to the table. The first thing he sees when he heads towards your table is your smiling face looking directly at Dohyun. 

Hell no. 

“Here’s your water,” Jeongguk places down each glass one by one. “And your wine,” He carefully puts down yours, making direct eye contact with you as he does. He notices you gulp and he tries to hold back a smile. When he’s setting Dohyun’s glass on the table, his finger accidentally knocks over the glass, causing it to tip over onto the table and a little bit on Dohyun’s slacks. 

Okay, that one wasn’t planned, Jeongguk swears. 

Dohyun gasps out of surprise, standing up with his pants slightly soaked in the wine. Meanwhile, you’re just staring with your hand covering your mouth, eyes wide. Jeongguk quickly acts shocked as well. 

“I am so sorry,” He picks up the white cloth napkin and attempts to dab it on Dohyun’s pants at the front. “I’m really sorry. I don’t know how that fell over.” He pretends to wince, facial expression feigning guilt. 

Some of the people at the surrounding tables are watching, talking amongst themselves as they stare at what just happened. It’s like they’re expecting Dohyun to lash out at Jeongguk or something but instead, he says, “Hey it’s okay. It was an accident.” He grabs the cloth from the Jeongguk, patting the pants himself.

This guy is so damn nice, Jeongguk hates it. Why is he so damn nice? 

“You sure you don’t want to go clean up?” Jeongguk hears you ask, watching the whole scene in concern. 

“No no,” Dohyun shakes his head and waves off. “It’s alright. At least I’m wearing black pants so it’s not that noticeable.” He laughs and you just nod in response. 

“I’ll get you another glass,” Jeongguk speaks, turning around to get him another glass. Once he returns with a new one, he carefully places it on the table. 

“Alright, so did you guys decide what you want to eat?” Jeongguk clasps his hands together, looking between the two, gaze lingering on you. 

Look away, Jeongguk. Look. Away. 

“Hm, I’m having a hard time deciding actually,” Dohyun pouts, brows furrowed as he studies the menu. “Do you have any recommendations?” 

Boy, Jeongguk sure does. 

Clearing his throat, he slightly cranes his neck to look over at the menu and points at one item in particular, “I recommend this filet mignon. Everyone loves it.” And it’s fucking expensive as fuck. 

Jeongguk hears you add to the conversation, “It’s almost 150,000 won…” You’re staring at him in ridicule, mouth parted and eyes wide. 

If there’s anything Jeongguk has learned about you, it’s that you’re not dumb. In fact, you are very fucking intelligent and he’s pretty sure you can see right through his actions. But for some reason, that doesn’t stop Jeongguk. Maybe he wants to have a bit of fun with this. In his defense, he’s trying to help you. 

“Don’t worry about the price, Y/N. I can afford it,” Dohyun acts nonchalantly, looking up at Jeongguk and confidently saying, “I’ll have that.” He then looks at you. “Y/N?” 

You let out a defeated sigh, closing the menu, “I’ll just have the risotto carnaroli de coquillages.” The way you say it so eloquently in French almost makes Jeongguk's dick hard. God, it sounded so hot. 

How much more attractive and interesting can you get? 

And also, where the fuck did you learn to speak perfect French?

It seems as though Jeongguk isn’t the only one affected by your French speaking because when he looks at Dohyun, the younger man is just staring at you with parted lips and stars in his eyes as if you’re the greatest thing he’s ever seen. 

You’re so damn nice that you ended up choosing the cheapest entree on the menu. You were just way too damn considerate. There goes that rich girl persona he was trying to paint to Dohyun. 

Trying not to physically drool, Jeongguk looks away and nods, “Got it.” He walks always so fast, almost bumping into another waiter on his way. 

+

You have a feeling that Jeongguk is trying to fuck up the date you’re on with Dohyun. You can see right through him. Having the poor guy choose expensive menu items so he can impress you when Jeongguk knows damn well you’re not about it. 

At least this can kind of confirm that he was affected by the whole date thing. That answers some questions but not all. 

Also, can you just say that Jeongguk looks fine as fuck in his uniform? 

If you had known that he works here as a waiter, you would’ve definitely joined your mother for the sake of seeing him. The sight of him wearing that tight-fitted button-up with those slacks hugging his ass almost had you drooling. 

You tried so hard not to just dead-on stare at him the whole time while he was standing right in front of you. You just couldn’t help yourself at times, eyes trailing down from his perfectly structured face to his chest and down to his tattooed covered hands and forearms that were peaking out from beneath his shirt sleeve. 

Your mind was steering away to some…unholy thoughts. Especially because of those damn thighs. 

Why did he have to be so damn hot? 

Okay, you’re getting a little too carried away right now. You need to focus. Focus on Dohyun. The man you came on a date with. You have to try and at least make some sort of conversation with him. He’s always asking you for your opinion and thoughts on what he’s saying but you end up stuttering your way through the conversation since you have no idea what he’s asking you about when you’re not listening. 

Jeongguk being here as your damn waiter does not help the situation at all. Although you think he’s trying to help you in a somewhat cruel way you need to get him to stop. You’re beginning to feel guilty as fuck when you see the man do something that is the total opposite of impressing you. 

“Um Y/N?” You’re snapped out of your thoughts when you hear Dohyun calling your name. 

“Yes? Sorry,” You apologize, feeling bad for being distracted again. 

Dohyun shakes his head, a small smile on his face, “No worries. I just wanted to talk to you about something.” 

Your heart races at that and you gulp, beginning to feel a little worried at what exactly he wants to say. No no, you didn’t think it be this soon. You need to tell him before he tells you. You can’t let him tell you first. 

Before you can say anything more, he continues, “I don’t know if you remember that before you left for college I was going to–” 

“More wine anyone?” Jeongguk cuts in, holding up the bottle and acting oblivious to what he just interrupted. Your shoulders relax in relief and you nod rapidly. 

You really need a fucking drink to get through this. 

“Yes please,” You hold up your glass and he pours it in for you. 

“There you go,” His fingers brush against yours which ensures the glass is in your hand’s grip when you pull it back and you try not to shiver at the tinging feeling and his eyes directly looking into yours.

“Dohyun?” Jeongguk looks at him with a questioning gaze, holding out the bottle but the other just shakes his head in response. 

“I’m good thanks,” He looks eager for Jeongguk to leave right now, knee bouncing in anxiousness. 

“Okay well your food should be here shortly,” Jeongguk says before turning to leave. He looks a bit hesitant to leave, glancing over his shoulder to look at you and you just send him a fake small smile, looking down into your lap. 

What the fuck do you do? 

“As I was saying Y/N, before you left for college I was going to tell you something,” Dohyun’s voice sounds a little shaky when he speaks. “But you had to leave and I never got the chance but for so long I–” 

“Bathroom!” You blurt out, eyes going wide. 

Dohyun looks confused, “Huh?” 

You let out a nervous laugh, “Um I just really need to use the bathroom,” You stand up, grabbing your purse. “Can you give me a few minutes? I really gotta pee.” No, you don’t. You need to go freak the fuck out and possibly climb out of the window. 

“Oh okay,” He nods understandably before flashing you a sweet smile. “I’ll wait.” 

You give him a fake smile in response, pushing into your chair before walking towards the bathroom. You maneuver your way around a few waiters, avoiding eye contact and rushing inside. Luckily no one else is in the bathroom so you just stand in front of the sink, taking a few deep breaths as you stare into the mirror. 

You don’t know how to turn him down. He’s getting so close to telling you about his feelings. You didn’t have the heart to turn him down for the date. What if you can’t reject his feelings for you either? 

If that ends up happening, you’d be absolutely fucked. 

You don’t even fucking see a window in here otherwise you’d escape right there. 

“You okay?” You hear a familiar voice ask, causing you to flinch in surprise, hand resting on your chest. 

“Holy shit,” You exhale. “You scared me.” You look at Jeongguk, wondering how the hell you didn’t hear him enter the bathroom. 

The women’s bathroom might you add. 

“Yeah yeah,” You try to wave off. “I’m fine. What are you doing in here?” You quickly ask, looking away and pretending to look into the mirror and fix your hair. 

“I saw you come in and you didn’t look too good,” He shrugs, hands in his pocket as he leans against the wall. “Just thought I’d check up on you.” 

Your heart swells a little at his concern. You’re in awe at the fact that he cared enough to come to see how you’re doing because he thought something was wrong. God, he’s making you like him more and more. 

“I’m,” You clear your throat, “I’m good.” You’re not. “I think.” You add before letting out a shaky breath. “It’s not every day that someone is about to confess about being in love with you for years.” You let out a humorless chuckle. 

“Well you’re right about that,” Jeongguk says and you look at him with a raised eyebrow. He clicks his tongue against the roof of his mouth. “Sorry, not helping.” 

“Not at all,” You respond, turning around so you can lean your back against the counter of the sink. “Aren’t you going to be in trouble for being here?” 

Jeongguk shrugs, “Not my first time being in the women’s bathroom during a shift,” He smirks and your chest slightly tinges in jealousy at what he’s implying but then he adds, “I once had to help an old lady clean a stain off of her dress.” You relax at that, causing Jeongguk to smirk. 

“What did you think I meant?” He teases and you roll your eyes in response. 

“Was it a wine stain cus’ you sure seem to be quite clumsy for a waiter,” You ask with heavy sarcasm, watching how he pushes himself off the wall. 

“Hey! That was actually an accident,” Jeongguk tries to defend. 

“I’m sure it was,” You remark, arms crossed over your chest. You try not to notice how he’s slowly walking toward you. 

“It was,” He answers before saying, “Look I’m trying to help you out over here.” 

You pout, avoiding eye contact with him by staring down at the pristine tiled floor. “I don’t need help.” 

You’re lying. You really fucking need help. 

Jeongguk lets out a sigh, “Y/N, why’d you say yes to the date if you knew you didn’t like him?” He asks, pierced brow raised in question. 

Unable to meet his eyes, you fiddle with the rings on your fingers and say, “I just felt really bad because he just seemed so excited,” You look up at him, “I just didn’t know how to say no.” 

Jeongguk nods and you notice how he’s standing directly in front of you now. You swallow at the sight of how good he looks in his button-up that shows off his small waist and strong chest. The sleeves are snug around his biceps and the black dress pants accentuate his strong thighs. 

“Yeah but now look,” His hand gestures towards the door to refer to Dohyun. “You said yes to the guy, making him think he has a chance or that you might like him or something.” The guilt weighs down on your chest and you stare down at the floor in shame. 

 Jeongguk is right. You made the mistake of saying yes and it probably made Dohyun hopeful that the feelings he has for you are mutual in return. But that’s not true when the man standing a few inches in front of you is the only one you want. 

Seeing the uniform hug his body in a way that shows off his toned muscles almost has you drooling and you try not to shiver at how his dark eyes give you a once-over. You know you look good with the way your black dress is hugging your body, the slit reaching your midthigh, showing off your smooth skin. His eyes seem to linger on that area in particular and you try not to smile. 

“I just couldn’t say no,” You whine, pouting at the floor with your arms crossing over your chest. 

Jeongguk dips his head a bit, bringing it closer to yours with just a few inches of space in between, and asks, “And why couldn’t you say no?” 

Your eyes can’t help but wander to his rose petal-colored lips that look so soft at the moment. You’re curious to know how the piercing would feel if you were to just kiss him on the mouth. There’s also that cute little mole he has beneath his bottom lip. Swallowing, you look up to find his doe-brown eyes staring at your own lips as well. 

Clearing your throat, you answer, “Because he brought me flowers a-and…” You shyly look away from his intense gaze, cheeks flushing as you look behind him. “And he got those expensive chocolates. I just didn’t know how to say no.” 

“What about me?” Jeongguk inquires, causing you to snap your head to look at him in surprise. 

“What about you?” You raise an eyebrow in question. 

Your heart starts to race when you notice his right hand come up to your face, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear. His fingers lightly brush against your exposed neck, causing you to slightly shiver at his touch. 

If he can just wrap those hands around your throat you don’t think you’d mind at all. 

“What if I brought you flowers and overpriced chocolates and asked you out to dinner?” He asks, eyes watching how you grab his right hand, fingers tracing over the tattoos on his knuckles. 

“I would’ve said yes even if you didn’t bring me flowers or overpriced chocolates,” You tell him truthfully, enjoying the satisfied look on his face. 

“Well,” He looks down at your joined hands before intertwining his fingers with yours. “Good to know I don’t have any competition.” You snort at that, suddenly feeling brave and pull him closer to you. 

You know you shouldn’t be doing this right now. Not when you’re literally on a date with someone who’s been crushing on you since you were kids but you’re in the bathroom with your waiter slash gardener slash friend? Acquaintance? Whatever he is, what you know for sure is that you want to kiss him right in the mouth because he looks too good not to. 

So you do. 

Forgetting about everything else going on, you make the move you’ve been desperately wanting to make since you saw the man standing in front of you. 

You grab the collar of his shirt and tug him down so you can press your lips against his in a lustful kiss. A small noise of surprise leaves his lips but he quickly reacts by putting his hands on your waist and returning the affection.

The feeling of his lips against yours was nothing like you’d ever felt before. They felt almost silk-like and pillowy as they moved against yours in the heated kiss. Sparks ignite, in your chest, buzzing throughout your entire body as his large hands slid up and down your back before moving down toward your hip. He squeezes it softly, causing you to inhale sharply.

His lips move against yours in a soft but sensual manner that has your knees slightly quivering and your heart pounding. You feel breathless when you pull apart for a few seconds with his forehead resting against yours. His right-hand cups your face, thumb playing with your bottom lip.

Jeongguk smirks, “You look good with your lipstick smeared.” You roll your eyes playfully but you can feel the heat in your cheeks at his comment. 

“Shut up,” You pull him until your lower back hits the counter behind you, his hands caging your body against it which causes a rush of excitement to run up your spine. You can’t help but give him a once over, noticing how pink his lips look now, hair slightly unruly from your hands. Jeongguk watches as you bring your hands to his chest, fiddling with the collar before letting them trail down his chest to feel his pecs. 

The muscles feel hard and firm beneath your hand as you trail them down toward his abdomen. When your hands dip a little too low, he quickly snatches your hand and holds it up against his chest, tugging you close by the waist with the other arm. 

“Nuh-uh,” Jeongguk clicks his tongue, “As much as I’m into the idea of fucking you in a public area, you are not about to start this in the fucking bathroom at my job.” Your cheeks flush immediately and you try to shove him away but he hardly moves. 

God, you just wanted to devour him right here. You couldn’t handle the sight in front of you right now. You know this is just his work uniform but you never would’ve thought that he can look this good. You just wanted to get on your knees and… 

“Y/N.” You immediately snap out of your horny thoughts, eyes wide and face warm. Jeongguk has a stupid smirk on his face as if he knows what you’re thinking about right now. 

Despite wanting to tackle him to the ground and have him take you right here, you remember you have a whole date waiting for you outside at the table most likely wondering where you are. 

“What?” You clear your throat, pushing those lustful thoughts aside. 

Jeongguk holds a teasing smile on his face, “Are you dreaming about my dick?” 

“What-no!” You deny, pushing him off and turning towards the mirror to fix your hair. You notice how your lipstick is smeared, courtesy of Jeongguk. You take a tissue and clean it before opening your clutch to pull out the liquid lipstick so you can reapply it. 

You can feel Jeongguk’s eyes on you the whole time as you’re bent over the counter, looking closely in the mirror. You try not to make eye contact, gliding the applicator across your bottom lip. 

Your breath hitches in your throat when you feel his hand slide on your hip but you pretend to like it doesn’t affect you even though your heart rate starts to increase and a feeling of thrill runs up your spine. 

“You were totally dreaming about my dick,” You glare at him through the mirror, elbowing him in the abdomen which causes him to slightly groan. 

“Why would I be thinking about your dick when I’m on a date with someone else right now?” You ask. 

Jeongguk snickers, “You weren’t saying that when you had your tongue down my throat a few minutes ago.” 

Your jaw drops and you turn around, pushing at his shoulder, “I did not have my tongue down your throat.” 

He has that smug smile on his annoyingly handsome face that had you contemplating whether you wanted to smack him or kiss him again. 

“It’s okay, you’re too shy to admit it right now. You’ll get comfortable eventually,” He shrugs, avoiding the little punch you were about to deliver to his chest. He grabs your hand instead and pulls you towards him once again with his tattooed arm around your waist while the other cups your cheek. 

“You’re annoying,” You mumble, playing with the top button on his shirt. You notice ink peeking out from where the shirt is unbuttoned which you somehow haven’t noticed before. 

Can this man get any more attractive? 

“I’d say charming,” Jeongguk responds before asking, “We’ve been here for quite some time now.” 

“You’re the one who followed me,” You retorted. 

“I had to make sure you were okay,” Jeongguk defends, thumb stroking your cheek. “What are you going to do now?” 

You let out a dreaded sigh, letting your hands rest against his chest as you say, “I’m going to have to tell him I’m not interested.” You shake your head. “I shouldn’t have said yes in the first place. It was a mistake from that day but he just had this hopeful smile on his face. I didn’t have it in me to deny him.” 

Jeongguk looks at you with a nonjudgmental gaze, nodding his head. “You can’t let this drag out any longer.” 

“I know,” You agree, thinking about how crushed Dohyun is going to look once you tell him the truth. 

“He’s going to be heartbroken,” Jeongguk adds. 

You pout, “I know.”

“But I’m going to be one happy man.” 

“I know–wait what?” You almost missed what he said and he just chuckles in response. “Why would you be happy?” 

“Cuz then I can ask you out on a date,” Jeongguk says with full confidence, wrapping both arms around your waist and swaying you side to side. 

“And you’re so sure I’d say yes?” You ask, eyebrows raised in question. 

He narrows his eyes at you playfully and says, “With the way you were about to get on your knees I’d like to think–” 

You slap his chest, “God, you’re so annoying! See if I ever give you head now.” 

“I’m kidding,” Jeongguk pouts. “You can’t take away that privilege already. You haven’t even done it yet.” 

Rolling your eyes at his response, your hand plays with the piercing in his right eyebrow. His hands rest on your lower back casually as if you guys have done this a million times. Jeongguk is definitely a touchy person but not in a way that’s made you uncomfortable of course. You’ve enjoyed the feeling of his hands on your body and you wonder what it would feel like on your bare skin. 

You’d definitely like to find that out. 

To say that you’re surprised he’s even talking to you would be an understatement. Especially after the day he saw you accepting Dohyun’s little gifts and proposal to dinner. He had left so abruptly much to your disappointment. And even after that, you didn’t even catch wind of him when working around the garden. 

You really thought you lost your opportunity with him but his actions and words say otherwise. 

“You didn’t answer my question,” Jeongguk’s statement breaks you out of your thoughts. 

“What question?” 

He raises an eyebrow, “If you’d like to go on a date with me.” He runs his thumb over your bottom lip, staring at them as if he wants to just devour them again but he’s restraining himself. 

You didn’t even realize he asked you that question. 

With a snort, you say, “Are you seriously going to ask me this in the bathroom while my actual date is waiting for me outside?”

Jeongguk rolls his eyes at you, “I’m sorry would you like me to shower you with flowers and expensive as fuck chocolates? I can also ask Bill, who is playing the violin in the dining room right now, to play you a song while I ask you out.” 

This time you roll your eyes at his response, “No need for flowers and expensive as fuck chocolates,” you emphasize his words. “And his name is Bill? He doesn’t even look like a Bill.” 

“That’s what I’ve been telling my coworkers. He looks more like a Marvin to me.” Jeongguk says and you nod your head in agreement after a quick thought. 

“Tell you what, give me your number first and then I’ll give you a response,” You don’t know where this confidence suddenly came from 

“You know you could’ve just asked me for my number if you wanted it so bad,” He laughs and you ignore him, handing him your phone. 

“Hush, I need to leave now so hurry up,” You watch as he types in his number, an amused smile pulling at his lips which causes you to narrow your eyes at him.

He hands you back your phone, an innocent smile on his face while you’re looking at him suspiciously. When you glance down at your phone, you understand why he has that look on his face. 

The contact name for his number is My super hot gardener &lt;3 <3

Can he get any more annoying? 

“Are you kidding me?” You ask him but don’t change the name anyways. 

“Not at all, love.” He pulls you forward once more, cupping your face with both hands this time, causing you to look up at him. “Listen, don’t worry about how Dohyun is going to feel, and don’t beat yourself up about it either.” You nod sadly. “You can’t keep leading him on like this. Neither of you deserve that. So just be honest about your feelings towards him.” Jeongguk tilts your head up to look at him. “You have to put yourself first okay?” 

You nod understandingly, hands going behind his neck to pull him down for another sweet kiss because you just couldn’t fucking help yourself. The feeling of his lips on yours was just so damn addicting. The way he was gazing at you with those soft doe eyes and the comforting words he provided had your stomach fluttering with butterflies. 

Your lips move in sync, arms tightening around one another as if you didn’t want to let each other go. His tongue prods at your lips, asking for entrance which you grant. His tongue slides into your mouth, hands digging into your hips as he fights for dominance with your own tongue. The kiss becomes more and more heated, your hands tangling in his wavy hair once again while you’re pretty sure your lipstick is smeared over both your lips as well as his own. 

The sound of your phone vibrating has you pulling back from his lips with a loud POP. Your chest is heaving, slightly out of breath from the intense kiss. Jeongguk runs his thumb across his lip to clean the faint lipstick while you’re opening your purse to see a message from Dohyun. 

Dohyun: Hey Y/N, are you okay?” 

Great, he must think you’re fighting for your life in the bathroom or something. It’s probably been well over 20 minutes so you can’t blame him. 

“I really have to go now.” You tell Jeongguk and he nods understandingly. 

“It’s fine,” He grabs a tissue and brings it up to clean beneath your lower lip. “Your lipstick smeared again.” You smile at the gesture in a thankful manner, letting him clean it for you.

He’s going to kill you. 

“Remember what I said okay?” He tells you and you nod in response, your throat feeling tight already at the conversation you’ve been dreading the whole night. “And I’ll be nearby in case you need help.” You nod once again, feeling reassured by his words. 

“Okay, thanks.” You give him a sweet smile, leaning up on your tiptoes to kiss his cheek which catches him off guard.  

“Yeah…” He clears his throat, “No problem.” 

With a small smile, you turn around and walk out the bathroom door not without looking over your shoulder at Jeongguk one last time. 

Here goes nothing. 

+

“Hey, sorry I took so long,” You apologize to Dohyun, straightening out your dress before sitting back down on the chair. 

Dohyun just gives you a sweet, understanding smile in return and says, “It’s okay. Jeongguk hasn’t even come by with the food yet.” 

You cough, taking a sip of your water to hide the flush of your cheeks. If only he knew Jeongguk was too busy with his tongue down your throat in the bathroom. The thought of what just went down in the bathroom had your stomach swirling in excitement. You hope the small smile on your face was not too obvious.  

“Is everything okay?” Dohyun’s voice is filled with concern. 

You’re snapped out of your thoughts at the sound of his question, looking up at him with wide eyes. You need to focus on the fact that you’re on a date with Dohyun right now and that you only have to endure this for a little bit longer before the food comes. 

Then you actually have to let Dohyun down politely. Honestly, you don’t even know why you don’t just get it over with right now. 

Jeongguk’s words echo in your head, telling you that it’s okay to think about yourself and turn Dohyun down. There’s no reason for you to be stretching this time out even longer. It’ll save him the heartbreak. It’s not like he was wrong. The further you lead Dohyun on, the more hurt he’ll be in the end when he finds out you do not reciprocate mutual feelings.

You also can’t forget the soft look in Jeongguk’s eyes. It was a look that you’d never seen on his face before and one that you didn’t think he was capable of showing considering his intimidating aura. But if there’s one thing you learned, it’s that Jeongguk is far from intimidating underneath all those piercings, ink, and black clothes. 

God, you just wanted this date to be over so you can tell Jeongguk to fuck off his shift for the night and go somewhere so the two of you can spend some time together. 

“Uh yeah, I’m okay,” You take a sip of your wine this time. “I’m fine. It’s just a little hot in here.” You’re praying he buys that excuse for your flushed face. You exaggerate it by fanning yourself with the menu listed with the different alcoholic beverages. 

“Oh no,” Dohyun looks worried. “Do you want to go somewhere else?” He asks seriously. 

“No no,” You wave off. “I’ll be okay. Thank you though.” You reassure him with a small smile. You are not about to drag this night out any longer. 

Dohyun nods though he looks a bit unconvinced. You fiddle with your fingers, unsure of what else to say. The silence between the two of you is awkward. You’re staring down into your lap while Dohyun opens and closes his mouth as if he wants to say something but holds himself back. 

“So Y/N,” You look up at Dohyun. “You probably already have an idea why I asked you out to dinner.” You try not to make it obvious when your eyes become a little wider, your heart dropping in your chest. “I mean..” He chuckles a bit, scratching the back of his neck. “We’ve known each other for so long. I remember watching you as a kid, thinking you’re the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen.” You try to smile but you think it looks more like a grimace. 

“I remember when one of the kids your mom would set you up with for playdates was being so mean to me  but you just…came to the rescue and told them to leave me alone.” The memory was quite vivid to you only because ever since that day, you noticed how Dohyun would start bringing you small gifts like a flower from the garden or pieces of candy. “That’s when I knew I started to develop feelings for you.” 

And there it is. The expression on his face is filled with admiration and love as he stares at you intently, pouring his heart out to you and confessing his feelings. Something you’ve always feared because you knew that by the end of this, he was going to leave with a broken heart. You let yourself get way too far and led him to this point. Now it’s your job to end it. 

“I just really want to tell you that I’ve always loved–” 

Dohyun gets interrupted when Jeongguk arrives with a tray carrying your entrees. “Alright you guys, the food is here.” Dohyun’s face drops, falling silent at the interruption while you’re filled with relief, exhaling out a breath. You look up at Jeongguk only to catch him already looking at you, giving you a small wink that Dohyun isn’t able to see. 

“Filet mignon for you,” Jeongguk sets down the plate in front of Dohyun who thanks him in response with a polite smile. “And risotto for the pretty lady,” Jeongguk emphasizes pretty and you bite your lip to hide the smile that threatens to form on your face. 

“Thank you, Jeongguk,” Your foot brushes against his ankle purposely when you uncross your legs and he just looks at you with a certain glint in his eyes, a pierced eyebrow raised at the gesture. 

“No problem,” He clears his throat, breaking eye contact so it doesn’t look so obvious to Dohyun. “Is there anything else you guys need?” 

Dohyun looks at you in question and you shake your head as a no in response. He then looks back up at Jeongguk and gives him a grateful smile, “No, we’re good. Thanks, man.” 

“Yeah, no problem. I’ll be back to check on you guys,” He informed you and it sounded like he was mostly talking to you from the way he looks at you, eyes lingering before leaves. He needs to stop making it so damn obvious. 

“So…” Dohyun is about to start talking but you interrupt him. 

“Let’s eat, I’m starving,” You immediately pick up the fork and dig into the feed even though you had no appetite to consume food. If anything, you felt nauseous. You’re dreading the conversation that you’re about to have. 

“Wow,” Dohyun’s eyes are wide as he chews his food. “This steak is amazing.” He gushes, cutting into the meat with his knife and fork before holding it in your direction. “You need to try this.” 

You shake your head, “Oh no, I’m okay. Thank you though.” You politely decline and give him a grateful smile. 

“No seriously,” He responds. “You have to try this.” He seems persistent, wiggling his fork towards you with a bite of the tender-looking steak. You gulp, noticing how he’s leaning forward in anticipation with an eager look in his eyes. You’re about to lean forward, lips parted to take a bite but Jeongguk being the savior he is–God, you can just kiss him–comes back. 

“You guys look like you’re running low on wine so I brought some more,” Jeongguk chirps, moving Dohyun’s arm back so he can pour into the glass. You bite down on your lower lip to keep yourself from smiling widely, meeting Jeongguk’s eyes with a thankful expression. You opt to stare at his beautiful inked hands pouring into the wine glass as you try not to make it obvious when your hand secretly strokes his thigh. You hold back a laugh when you notice him slightly flinch out of surprise, jaw clenching, and eyes narrowed when he glances at you.

You feign a look of innocence and say, “Thank you for the wine.” You’re grateful that the table is high enough that Dohyun can’t see how Jeongguk takes his left hand while the right is still holding the bottle and squeezes your hand. 

Jeongguk clears his throat, 

“Thanks, Jeongguk,” Dohyun gives him an appreciative smile, “I was just trying to get Y/N to try the filet mignon.” 

“Oh yes,” Jeongguk says, attempting to sound professional and you bite back a laugh, “Many customers rave over the filet mignon. The cows were fed organic grass which is one of the reasons why it’s so delectable.” 

Organic grass? What the fuck is he even saying? 

You know damn well he’s trying to be funny but the way he said it with a straight face would make one think he’s serious. For example, Dohyun looked utterly fascinated by the thought. 

“Wow, are they really?” 

Jeongguk snorts but quickly covers it with a cough, “Yeah man. Don’t you know? Those cows are living their best life. Better than you and I,” Jeongguk takes the fork out of Dohyun’s hand and the other boy just stares at him, eyes wide in curiosity. He grabs the piece of steak that was originally meant for you and slides the bite into his mouth before giving Dohyun the fork back. Jeongguk scrunches up his face in delight, almost looking angry as he chews before he lets out a sigh and looks back at Dohyun. “Dare I say the cows are living a better life than Y/N too.” 

You cover your face, unable to hold back your giggles while Dohyun just looks confused now. Jeongguk has a small smile on his face as he glances at you, feeling accomplished for making you laugh so cutely. 

“I have to ask my uncle about this if it’s true,” Dohyun shakes his head, expression full of surprise as he looks deep in thought. “He owns a farm so maybe he can start doing that too.” 

Jeongguk looks like he’s trying not to burst out laughing this time but instead nods, “Yeah let me know what he says, man.” 

“Jeongguk, Suho is calling you to the back,” A waiter whispers into his ear, “Like now.” 

“Now?” Jeongguk asks and the other waiter nods. He looks back at you and sees you swallow nervously. This means Jeongguk can no longer save you from delaying this any further. It’s either now or never. 

You look back at Jeongguk and give him a reassuring nod in a subtle manner to tell him it’s okay if he leaves. He glances over at Dohyun, noticing how the other boy is tapping his foot impatiently beneath the table as if waiting for Jeongguk to leave so he can pick up where he left off. 

“Alright,” Jeongguk clears his throat, “Looks like I’m needed in the back. Are you guys good?” He asks, mostly directing the question at you based on the direct eye contact he makes, eyebrow raised. 

You give him an appreciative smile, “I’m good. Thank you, Jeongguk.” 

“Me too. Thanks, Jeongguk!” Dohyun says a slight eagerness following his tone. 

“Okay cool, be right back.” He tells you, sending you a small comforting smile. You let out a deep breath, looking over at Dohyun who’s already staring at you with a nervous expression on his face. 

“Y/N, there’s something I need to tell you. I’ve been meaning to tell you for so long but…” Dohyun twiddles with his fingers resting on top of the table. “I would just get so nervous and chicken out,” He chuckles at himself with a shake of his head. “I’ve always admired you and your kindness. Your kindness is what drew me to you more than anything. Comforting people when they’re upset and going out of your way to make them feel better.” Your lips turn up into a small smile at his words but your chest aches out of guilt with what you’re about to do. “Basically, what I’m trying to tell you is that…I uh really really like you. I’ve liked you since we were kids. Maybe even love.” Dohyun lets out a quivering laugh, avoiding eye contact. “I was wondering if you’d give me a chance.” 

Your throat feels like it’s closing up as you hear his words, processing them clearly. The feeling of your heart pounding against your chest and beating in your ears, your face feeling warm and flushed. You look down at your hands in your lap, playing with the ring on your index finger as you let out a shaky breath through your lips. 

“Dohyun…you’ve always been a sweet guy,” You begin, “So selfless and always thinking of others.” You add and he nods, a smile playing on his lips from your compliment. “But I…I’m sorry,” You feel your eyes stinging as you notice the smile vanish from his face, lips pursing in despair. “I don’t see you that way.” You finally say. 

His face crumples a bit, shoulders and head dropping as soon as the words leave your lips. He looks down into his lap and you swear you can hear him sniffling a bit. The silence between you two is almost deafening, the sound of other customers and cutlery being the only thing you hear. 

“I’m really sorry,” You say again, eyes welling up a bit because of how bad you feel. “I probably shouldn’t have even said yes to you because it seems like I’ve led you on but I just didn’t know how to tell you no.” 

Dohyun just nods in response, not moving a single inch from his position and his lack of words is killing you. You notice Jeongguk peeking at you from behind the door, locking eyes with you. He immediately notices the sorrowful look on your face, stepping forward to approach you but you quickly shake your head. 

Not yet, you try to tell him. You think this conversation needs to end with closure. You don’t want to leave without making sure he’s okay. You know he’s not okay and he probably won’t be for some time. He’s had feelings for you for so long, he must feel so crushed by your rejection. 

When Dohyun finally lifts his head up to look at you, you feel your chest ache at his red-rimmed eyes and quivering lips. “Y-You won’t even give me a chance? Like… not even if I take you on more dates a-and maybe let you get to know me better?” He wipes his nose with the back of his hand, sniffling. 

You shake your head, a sad smile on your lips. “I’m sorry…I just,” You look over at Jeongguk who’s talking to another customer while constantly glancing at you in concern. “I like someone else.” You tell him, feeling like absolute shit. You just didn’t know what else you could’ve told him for him to completely let you go. You had to tell him the truth. 

His face shows pure anguish, looking completely defeated. “So I-I don’t stand a chance against him?” He asks, voice hoarse. 

“I’m sorry,” is the only thing you think you can say in response to that. 

He just nods, head hanging low and lets out a quiet. “Okay.” 

“Everything good?” Jeongguk decides to cut in, saving you from this painful moment. 

Dohyun just looks up and Jeongguk in response and nods solemnly, “Yeah can we get the check please?” 

“Uh yeah sure,” Jeongguk responds. “Boxes?” 

“No thanks,” Dohyun immediately says, his voice cracking. “Y/N,” He looks at you properly for the first time. “Do you think I can get a r-ride home? I-I just don’t think I can…” He looks like he’s about to have a breakdown so you immediately cut in. 

“It’s okay. Don’t even worry about it.” Your voice is soft, feeling like you need to speak to him in a delicate manner because he may break any second. “I’ll call my driver.” 

“Okay,” Dohyun nods. “I’m gonna go. I’ll see you on Monday.” He says quickly before getting up swiftly. There’s a fresh set of tears in his eyes and he nods at Jeongguk. Head hanging low with his feet dragging across the floor, he walks towards the door without looking back. 

You stare at the door, never feeling this much guilt and regret in your life. Guilt for turning him down but also regret even accepting this date. You think saying yes to the date probably gave him high hopes that you had feelings for him in return. You should’ve come clean at the pool when he asked you out in the first place.  

“Oh god,” You cover your face with both hands. “I feel so awful. I feel so fucking awful. I can’t believe he cried.” Your throat feels tight and painful, unable to get the image of your head. 

“Hey hey,” Jeongguk looks around before kneeling beside you, hand on your arm, “It’s okay. You had to do it okay?” You nod but don’t move your hands away from your face. 

“I know I just can’t forget the look on his face,” You whisper into your hands. “I just feel so bad.” 

“I know Y/N. That wasn’t an easy thing to do,” Jeongguk acknowledges, rubbing his hand up and down your back in a comforting manner. 

Not only do you feel like a total asshole right now, you’re a little embarrassed at the fact that Jeongguk is seeing you on the verge of bursting into tears but you cannot help yourself. 

“Hey listen,” His voice is gentle and you feel him move closer to you, his chest pressing against your knee. “A lot of these people are looking at us and I don’t know if they know who you are but I don’t want it spreading around that you were crying in this boujee ass restaurant in the headlines tomorrow.” You chuckle a little taking the napkin he’s holding out for you, patting it beneath your eyes. 

“Thank you,” You say quietly, unable to look him in the eyes. 

“Of course,” He clears his throat. “I’m about to finish my shift soon. Um if you want, I can give you a ride home?” He offers before quickly adding. “Only if you want to. I won’t be offended if you just want your driver to pick you up.”

You finally look at him for the first time, taking slightly widened doe eyes, face looking soft. He’s tugging at the piercing on his lower lip, a nervous habit you’ve noticed from the time you’ve spent with him. 

“I would really appreciate that,” You inform him with a grateful smile. 

His shoulders visibly relax at your answer, a sigh escaping his lips. 

“Thank God you said that,” He pretends to wipe the sweat off his forehead, “I don’t think I was ready to handle the rejection.” He tells you and you feel like there’s some underlying truth to that. 

“The dude I’m crushing on is offering me a ride, who am I to say no?” You say bravely and he freezes, eyes wide and full of surprise with how you say that without a single stutter. 

“D-Dude you’re crushing on me?” He repeats, bringing his hand up to point his index finger at him. “Am I the dude you’re crushing on?” He asks in disbelief. 

You give him an ‘Are you joking’ look, pushing at his shoulder. “Who else is offering me a ride home here?” You ask him. 

“I’m sure tons of people would. You’re beautiful.” He says easily and you flush, not expecting that response at all. 

“Oh,” You look down at your lap with a smile on your lips. Feeling so flustered by his compliment, you change the subject. “Is it wrong to do all this after I just broke someone’s heart?” You ask him. 

Jeongguk shakes his head, “No, you did what you had to do, Y/N.” You nod, a slightly guilty expression appearing on your face once again. “Here,” He pulls out what looks like car keys from his back pocket. “Do you want to wait in my car while I finish up here?” 

You nod, grabbing the keys from him with a smile, “I’ll wait.” You grab your purse, pulling the strap onto your shoulder. Jeongguk also stands up from his kneeling position, brushing his black pants. 

Once you stand up, you have to peer up to look at him. Even with your heels on you, you’re still barely reaching his damn shoulder. 

Are you really that short or is he just super tall? 

“By the way,” You start, causing him to immediately pause from picking up the plate and giving you his full attention with the way he turns his body to look at you, eyes meeting yours. For some reason that makes your heart flutter. “Can you charge the dinner on my card?” You open your purse to pull out your tiny card holder. “It’s the least I can do for Dohyun.” You add, handing him the card. 

Jeongguk looks down at the card in his hand as if it’s the most fascinating thing he’s ever seen, eyes squinting before widening. He holds the card up to the light as if inspecting it before bringing it back down and closer to his face again.

“Um, is everything okay?” You ask in confusion. 

“Did you just hand me a black card?” His voice is full of surprise, mouth slightly ajar. 

“Yeah…” You trail off, looking down at your feet. 

Great, he must think you’re a spoiled brat. 

“Do you know the amount of unnecessary and useless shit I would buy if I had one of these?” He holds the card in his fingers as if it’s fine china. 

“I mean you can,” You respond and he just looks at you in disbelief.

“Baby you’re too sweet but I never thought about getting sugar mama.” He smirks before adding, “At least not anymore.” Your heart flutters and you try not to squeal at the fact that he casually called you ‘baby’. 

This man is trying to kill you. 

You pretend to act unbothered by his words with a roll of your eyes, shoving at his shoulder, “Shut up before I make you pay for this dinner.” You threaten and he immediately closes his mouth, turning towards the table. You laugh in response, shaking your head at him. 

“I’ll be out in 10 minutes,” He tells you and you nod, a smile on your face as you step towards the door already feeling a lot better just by talking to him. 

#jungkook fanfic #bts scenarios #jungkook au #jungkook x reader #bts writing #jungkook #jungkook fluff #my writing #jungkook fic rec #bts fanfiction #jungkook fanfiction #jungkook angst #jungkook scenarios #tattooed jungkook #bts fic recs #bts angst #jungkook imagines #kpop imagines #kpop fanfiction #jungkook series

[asahicore]

gorgeous - lhs

"you should take it as a compliment that i'm talking to everyone here but you / and you should think about the consequence of you touching my hand in a darkened room" - gorgeous by taylor swift

series masterlist - part one - part two - part three

prompt 45 of the 100 kisses list, "we shouldn't do this" but they do so anyway

pairing. best friend's brother!heeseung x fem!reader synopsis. Heeseung comes back from his first year of university a new man - forget nervous, fidgety, dorky Heeseung and say hello to confident, teasing, flirty Heeseung. This change of attitude doesn't help your longstanding crush on your best friend's brother, and neither does the rising tension between the two of you - a tension that is bound to explode. genre. f2l, did i mention this was a best friend's brother au?, only fluff in this part but more to come, perhaps suggestive due to tension between reader and hee and makeout session lol word count. 8.1k (yes an asahicore fic under 10k thank u very much) a/n. hi loves i'm super happy to be posting this bc its the very first fic out of the 100 kisses event and its a project im really excited about !!! i know i said like 2 days ago it'd take me a while to write this but i got super motivated over the weekend and it turned out shorter than i thought and bestie @k-ingzo zo did a super amazing job at beta reading this so i was able to post it really quickly !! anyways hope you enjoy this, pls lmk,, and hope u look forward to the rest of the series as well !! ok bye

Nine years ago

“Y/N, honey, come meet your new friends!”

You rushed down the stairs at your mom’s call - at eight, you were always excited by the idea of new friends. She’d also called Naeun down, but lately, your sister had been acting like doing anything your parents asked her would cost her her life.

There in your living room were four unfamiliar faces, but your parents were smiling warmly, so you weren’t too nervous. Instinctively, you found your mother’s side and she rested her hand on your head, bending down to talk to you.

“Y/N, these are the Lees, they’ve just moved to the neighborhood.”

“Hi,” you greeted shyly, and were met with four hi’s in return.

“Heeseung and Seeun here started going to the same school as you,” she informs, nodding her head towards the young boy and girl. Now that she said it, the boy looked really familiar. You thought you recognized him from school that day - his glasses were definitely memorable. “And Seeun is the exact same age as you!” Your face lit up at that, and her expression mirrored yours as her lips curled into a smile. “Why don’t you show her your room?”

“Sure! Come on,” you said, holding out your hand for Seeun to take. She looked back at her parents who were nodding vigorously at her to follow you. You just played for half-an-hour, and Heeseung joined you quickly, saying he was bored with the adults downstairs. He didn’t talk much, instead found some of your toys to play with in his own corner. 

When the Lees left, you were thinking two things: one, you couldn’t wait to tell Chaeyeong about Seeun, and two, that boy with the big glasses was really, really cute.

-

Now

“Seeun, why the hell didn’t you tell us that your brother is a mega-hottie now?!”

This is what your friend Chaeyeong whisper-screams in lieu of a greeting as she barges in Seeun’s room, plopping down on her bed like it was her own. It might as well have been, considering how long the three of you had known each other.

“If you ever refer to my brother as a mega-hottie again, I’m terminating this friendship,” Seeun replies, not bothering to look up from the bead bracelet she was currently making.

“Oh please, just because you’re his sister doesn’t mean you haven’t noticed how attractive he’s gotten,” Chaeyeong insists, but it just makes Seeun scrunch her nose in disgust.

“Chaeyeong, please stop making it so obvious you’re an only child,” Seeun sighs. You let out a giggle at your friends’ conversation as you search for another color that could go well with the pink beads you’d chosen for your own bracelet. 

Stealthily, Chaeyeong leaves her spot on the bed and sneaks up to you. “Y/N!” she exclaims suddenly, wrapping her arms around your shoulders in a sneak-attack hug that makes you yelp. It makes you drop your half-finished bracelet, the beads falling all over the carpeted floor around you. You look up at Chaeyeong with a pout, but she just smiles at you and starts picking up the beads, gathering the tiny pink jewels in the palm of her hand.

“Y/N, you’re with me on this one, aren’t you?”

You ignore Seeun’s side-eye and give in to Chaeyeong’s encouraging expression. “I guess he does look very…” you pause to carefully consider your word choice. “Different,” you settle on.

“Different? That’s it? Y/N, you should really consider getting some glasses, seeing how you’re so blind to hot boys.” Cue a loud groan, Seeun’s courtesy. You just giggle again, slightly shaking your head at Chaeyeong’s antics. She rolled her eyes, disappointed that you didn’t back her up, but she drops the subject and switches to Seeun’s upcoming birthday party. Something great about being generally quiet? People don’t question it when you don’t partake much in a conversation. You listen and laugh as your friends bicker, but your mind is on something else.

Or rather, it’s on someone else.

Because Chaeyeong is absolutely right - Seeun’s brother has glowed up so much during his time away at university that you had a double-take when he opened the door for you earlier.

The sentence this is so unfair plays over and over in your head.

You’d heard of the freshman fifteen, of college first-years being so stressed over grades and having so little time that their diet consisted of instant ramen, quick cafeteria lunches, and an ungodly amount of coffee. And alcohol, on Friday nights, of course. After seeing how freshman year treated your older sister, you were dreading going to college, imagining it to be the complete opposite of what TV and movies had shown you.

So how the hell had Lee Heeseung gone from high school loser to campus hearthrob in the span of a mere nine months? (After some thinking, you realized that, well, if a woman can create a whole human being in nine months, maybe a regular guy can undergo great physical and mental change in that time, too.)

In September, when you’d last seen him, he wore the same glasses he had for all of high school - those slightly crooked ones that made his eyes look even bigger than they already were. He always had to push them back up his nose but he never bothered to get them fixed, even though all they needed was for the arms to be tightened. You remember his tic-like habit of readjusting his glasses, a habit so strong that he did it even when he wasn’t wearing them. Maybe they bothered him so much that he decided to get rid of them once and for all, you guess. 

Indeed, when he greeted you at his front door earlier (even after years of knowing Seeun and her family and no matter how much they reassure you that it’s okay, you’re unable to come in without knocking first, like Chaeyeong does), he wasn’t wearing his thick lenses you’d grown fond of. His eyes didn’t look unfocused like they usually would without glasses, so you assumed he’d switched to contact lenses - you knew it wasn’t Lasik surgery, because Seeun was always complaining that her parents wouldn’t pay for her or her brother to receive it. 

But it wasn’t just the glasses, of course not. There was an ease and confidence about him that he didn’t have before - no awkward giggles, no darting eyes, no weirdly positioned limbs. He held the door open for you and kept his eyes on you as you walked in, saying it was nice to see you again and asking if you were happy to be done with high school. You already weren’t expecting Heeseung to open the door in Seeun’s stead, so him actually looking at you while he spoke instead of mumbling a few words in your general direction and scratching the back of his neck rendered you completely flustered, cheeks heating up embarrassingly quickly.

His hair was different: it used to sit there atop Heeseung’s head, unsure what to do with itself, but now it was purposefully cut and slightly pushed back. When he turned his head, you saw something shiny dangling from his left ear.

Heeseung had a piercing. Shy, nervous, fidgety electronics club president Heeseung had a goddamn piercing, and it looked amazing. 

And then he laughed. He actually had the audacity to laugh, and then ruffle your hair. You could’ve died right then and there. “You’re still just as cute as before,” he mused, beaming down at you. Then he walked away towards the living room, saying Seeun was in her room upstairs. As if nothing happened. As if you weren’t on the verge of combusting, your saving grace being your friend’s voice calling out your name. You ran up the stairs, wanting to get as far away from Heeseung and his smile and his voice and his touch as possible. You busied yourself with the pearls and the small bracelet-making station Seeun had organized, trying not to think about the vein that ran down his forearm or about how his shoulders looked wider than before. And you’d managed to do that, until Chaeyeong brought him up.

It wasn’t unfair because he’d grown mysteriously hot - it was unfair because to you, Heeseung had always been the cutest boy around, but now other people had surely noticed too, Chaeyeong amongst them. Now, you were just one of the many girls that had a crush on Heeseung, even if yours dated back to the first time you’d met him when the Lees moved into the neighborhood. 

Their parents had been delighted that two girls of their daughter’s age - eight, to be precise - lived on their street. You were delighted that the cute boy you’d seen at school that day was her big brother, just one year older. Chaeyeong and you gladly welcomed Seeun into your friendship and you had each other’s back through the awkward phases of your early teenage years and the stressful times as high school seniors getting ready for college. You shared everything - clothes, jewelry, homework answers, gossip, tears, laughter. Secrets.

You liked to think there wasn’t a thing you didn’t know about them, but you couldn’t say the opposite was true - there was a secret you had to keep from them. A secret that grew bigger and bigger as time passed, but that you needed to keep locked in.

You had the biggest crush known to mankind on your best friend’s brother. It was either keep quiet or tell both of your friends; you trusted Chaeyeong, but you didn’t want her to carry that burden. You had no idea what Seeun’s reaction would be if you admitted you liked her brother, but you didn’t want to risk it. Every best friend’s brother (or brother’s best friend) romance you’d read had told you that the former was always against and deeply disgusted by the idea of their friend dating the latter. The last thing you wanted to do was make things weird, so you said nothing and suffered in silence, as one does. And so, for years, Heeseung was your little secret.

But not anymore, apparently. And it felt unfair. You didn’t have much of a chance to begin with, but now, getting with Heeseung was inimaginable. You’d just have to continue pining from far away, just as you’d gotten used to.

-

Four years ago

Your heart pounded as you made your way to the bus stop, steps heavy and head full of thoughts. Even though your older sister told you there’s nothing to worry about, you couldn’t help it. You were used to walking to school, not taking the bus. After three years of seeing the same people roaming the hallways, it was nerve-wracking to arrive at a place where most faces would be completely unfamiliar. You didn’t know what your teachers would be like, you were scared your classes would be a hundred times harder than before, you heard the cafeteria food was really bad. In short, you were absolutely dreading high school. And today was your first day.

The only thing that calmed you down was knowing that in a few minutes, you’d be with Seeun and Chaeyeong, and just seeing them would make you feel instantly better. You were meeting at the bus stop.

But when you reached it, neither of your friends were there. You shouldn’t have been surprised, since you’d come ten minutes early, but you couldn’t help but feel slightly disappointed. That is, until you recognized someone else.

“Heeseung?” you called out before you could stop yourself. The boy snapped his head in your direction, and his eyes widened at the sight of you. Simple things like that made your heart burst with adoration for him.

“Oh, h-hi, Y/N.” He smiled the shy smile you loved so much and looked back at his feet, holding on tightly to the straps of his backpack. You stood next to him, close enough to have a conversation if he wanted to but not so close that it’d be weird.

Heeseung was the only person you felt awkward around. Even though you were on the quieter side and strangers weren’t your favorite people per se, being around people you didn’t know well wasn’t your definition of torture like it seemed to be for Heeseung and other kids from your school. But Heeseung’s awkwardness was contagious, and your crush on him didn’t help your ease of mind - so you imitated his posture, swaying back and forth on your feet as you held onto your backpack straps just to have something to hold onto. You smiled at the ground, not wanting to make him uncomfortable by looking at him, but that meant you missed the growing blush on his cheeks.

“So,” he started, “nervous?” He glanced quickly, just once, at you. You were so surprised at his breaking the silence, used to a quiet Heeseung, that you forgot to answer, simply staring at him. His panicked expression and mumblings were what jolted you out of your daze. “I-I mean, you know, cause it’s your first day and everything, and I was really nervous last year- I am today, too, actually- so I thought maybe, you know, you’re nervous too, but maybe you’re not, I don’t-”

He said all of this so quickly, you started laughing, slightly bending over. He let out a chuckle too, but as you continued laughing, a pout started to form on his lips. “What’s so funny…” you heard him grumble as he kicked a non-existent pebble.

“Sorry,” you said, regaining your breath. “I’m sorry, Heeseung.” The sound of his name made him glance at you again. You wished you could kiss the pout off his lips. “I was nervous, actually. But I feel better now.”

A quick smile appeared on his lips, but he willed it away. “I’m glad my embarrassment made you feel better,” he sighed.

You gently kicked his shoe with yours to make him look at you. “No, it’s because you made me laugh. I needed it. Thanks,” you corrected with a smile. Heeseung may have made you feel awkward, but the easiness with which he always got flustered made you love to tease him slightly.

His smile widened as he looked away once more, the blush having spread to his whole face by then. “Whatever,” he murmured. There was no time to say anything else because Seeun called out your name, practically skipping towards you. 

She gave you an excited hug as a greeting before turning towards her brother with a glare, punching him hard on the bicep, making him wince in pain and reach his hand to cover his arm where she hit him. “Thanks for waiting for me, loser.”

“You were gonna make us late!” he whined, rubbing his arm.

“Yeah, ‘cause I obviously missed the bus,” she tutted.

You watched the siblings with an amused smile, used to the exact same kind of banter at home. Your sister, who was in her last year of high school, had decided not to drive you for some reason only an older sister could make up and pretend was reasonable. Your parents had tried to convince her, but you didn’t mind taking the bus with your friends, so they didn’t push it, just glad they could somehow keep the both of you happy.

Heeseung didn’t say anything in return. Your eyes met for a moment, and his frown relaxed into a smile when he caught your expression. It lasted a second but it was enough to make your stomach twist. Seeun, oblivious, grabbed your arm and started telling you about all the things she was excited about for today. You were worried Chaeyeong wasn’t going to make it, but her footsteps were loud as she ran, reaching you just as the bus stopped in front of you. Heeseung took what you soon found out was his usual spot at the front of the bus while your friends dragged you towards the back of it. You tried not to let your thoughts drift towards the boy with the messy black hair and crooked glasses, but his shy smile replayed in your mind all day. For a year, you’d gotten used to not going to the same school as him - you didn’t know how you’d survive seeing him at least five days a week once again.

-

Now

You were really determined to not let Heeseung’s newfound confidence sway you, physically shaking your head every time a thought of him popped in your head (useless) and racking your brain for reasons you shouldn’t like him (not many of those). There was just one teeny, tiny problem.

He was making it impossible to pine for him at a distance. 

It seemed like everywhere you went, he was there. Maybe that was due to the fact that your most frequently visited place was literally his house, but still. It was frustrating. You didn’t need to be met with his stupid smile whenever he opened the door for you, you didn’t need to catch him cutely napping - how was that even possible?! - in the living room, a random sitcom still playing on the TV, you didn’t need to hear his laughter when his friends were over, and you definitely did not need to see him half-naked as he came out of the bathroom, hair wet from the shower and sticking to his forehead, towel wrapped low around his hips and his abs fully on display. Because of course, you had to be in the hallway, heading to the kitchen to get a glass of water, at the exact same time as him. 

You almost start to resent the fact that Seeun had the comfiest bedroom out of the three of you, as well as the most snack-filled house, which was why you had decided years ago to hang out there the most. Especially during school breaks, you were there almost every day, so you were bound to see Heeseung a lot. But for some reason, that didn’t seem to be enough, and over the course of June, you also ran into him while shoe-shopping with your mom, then another time as you entered the public library just when he left it, and another when your friends and his had decided to get ice cream at the same time. It was like you couldn’t escape him.

The worst part? Every time he saw you, while you simultaneously wanted to run away from him and into his arms, his damnedly handsome face broke into a stupidly beautiful smile that looked far too genuine for your heart. “Y/N! Funny seeing you here!”

No, Heeseung, not funny.

You didn’t want to be that girl whose brain cells stopped working whenever she encountered an attractive male specimen, but that was apparently who you were meant to be, because all words left you when you saw Heeseung. Although you’d been somewhat flustered around him in the past, he was always much more so than you, which reassured you and gave you enough confidence to actually talk to him. But now that he had realized how handsome he was and was clearly using that newfound knowledge against you (or so you thought), you were unable to string a coherent sentence when his shiny eyes bore into yours.

You think he might’ve sensed your awkwardness, because he never lingered, never made useless small talk, just asked about your favorite ice cream flavor or the book he’d checked out, patted your head, then was on his way.

There were so many butterflies in your stomach, you were scared it might fly away.

One afternoon in the middle of July, you and your friends come back from the city pool completely exhausted after playing around for hours in the water. All bundled up and close together, you try to nap on Seeun’s bed. Keyword try, because even though your friends’ soft snores quickly start to fill the silence of the room, you can’t seem to fall asleep, no matter how heavy your eyes feel.

Quietly, you get out of bed and head downstairs to the kitchen, hoping a cold glass of water will help sleep come to you like it usually does. You shouldn’t be surprised to see Heeseung in the dining room/kitchen area, busy with a puzzle, the pieces of which he’s spread out all over the table, but your heart still does a flip. He must be really engrossed in it, because he doesn’t notice your presence in the room until you fill a glass with ice, the sudden sound making his head snap up at you. You hate that his face breaks into a grin as soon as he sees you.

“Oh, hey, Y/N! What are you doing?”

“Just getting some water,” you explain, raising your glass with a small smile. Your whole body tells you to run away, back to Seeun’s bedroom, but something in your gut tells you to stay, to get closer to Heeseung. So you do. “What about you?” you ask, slowly making your way towards the table and peering at the puzzle in progress.

“Just whipping up some brownies,” he retorts with a devilish smirk, big eyes looking up at you. 

You fight back a smile in vain. “Shut up,” you mumble, but take a seat next to him anyway. He seems slightly taken aback by the sudden proximity, and you are too, but you keep your gaze focused on the puzzle in front of you so that you can’t think too much about how close you’re sitting, and how your knees could touch if you angled them just so.

For a small while you sit in silence, watching as he puts pieces together and even finding a couple of your own. It’s a one-thousand piece jigsaw that he’s clearly only just started, but Heeseung doesn’t seem fazed by that. You like seeing how his eyebrows slightly furrow when he’s searching for a particular piece, and the pleased smirk that graces his lips when he finds it. You break the silence after a few minutes.

“So you still like puzzles, then?” you ask, voice low. You’ve always been told you speak quietly - even too quietly sometimes, but you can’t always help it. Especially in situations like this, when it’s silent around you anyways, you don’t see the point of raising your voice. When Heeseung replies, he speaks at the same volume as you, and there’s something comforting about it, about speaking quietly in such a spacious and sunlit room - the words you share are for you two, and you two only.

“Yep, ever since that day.” He glances quickly at you and smiles at the piece in his hand, and it’s like getting a glimpse of the Heeseung you had known all those years. Your heart warms at the sight.

“That day?”

This makes him look properly at you, his eyes darting back and forth between yours as if searching for something there. Your heart is now on fire. “Don’t you remember?”

You tilt your head in response and he turns his attention back to the puzzle. “It was at this table, too. I think your grandparents- your grandma, I think? Anyway, someone had gotten you a puzzle for your birthday.”

You ‘ah’ in realization. “Of course!”

Two years ago

“Y/N, I’m sorry, I don’t think I can do this, it’s so complicated,” Seeun pouted apologetically, looking at you sadly. “We’ve been here like an hour and we’ve barely gotten anywhere.” 

Chaeyeong, head on the table, groaned in agreement. You followed your friend’s gaze to the puzzle in front of you - she was right, you hadn’t made much progress. But you liked it. The picture was pretty and you’d like to see it completed, but more than that, you liked finding the right piece, figuring out strategies.

You hummed, mirroring Seeun’s pout. Chaeyeong snapped her head back up to look at you. You’d think she hadn’t slept in days, but that was just bored Chaeyeong. You loved your friend and her over-dramatic antics. “Can we just take a break?” she asked, tone like you’d kidnapped and forced her to do this.

“You guys go ahead.” You smiled. “I like it, I can just continue this for a while and you guys do whatever you want.” The three of you spent so much time together that you didn’t need to be doing an activity together to be happy - being in each other’s general vicinity was enough to be considered a hang-out.

“You sure?” Seeun asked.

“Yeah, ‘course.” You chuckled at the obvious relief on your friend’s faces. “Just don’t watch the next Extraordinary You episode without me, okay?”

They both gasped and clutched their hearts like you’d accused them of murder. “How could you even think that, Y/N?!” Chaeyeong exclaimed.

“We would never!” Seeun added.

You shook your head at your friends’ antics, laughing as you waved them off. “Just go, already.”

“Yes, ma’am!” And with that, they were off, running up the stairs to Seeun’s bedroom.

You were only on your own for around ten minutes - the front door opened and closed, and the quiet shuffle of shoes being taken off and replaced with slippers let you know Heeseung had just come home. Seeun always made a show of being exhausted after school, groaning as she threw her backpack to the ground, while Mr and Mrs Lee always announced their arrival with a sometimes cheery, sometimes tired ‘I’m home!’. But Heeseung, quiet as always, simply set his backpack next to the stairs, slipped into his slippers and made his way to the kitchen, fond of a quick snack after school. Even Chaeyeong made herself more known when she entered the Lee household.

Every day except for Fridays, he came home two hours later than his sister because of either magic or electronics club (yes, magic club. It was cute, okay?!). You always looked forward to the monthly meeting of the book club you were in, partly because it meant you could take the bus back with Heeseung afterwards. Even if the ride was usually mainly silent, just sitting next to him was enough for your heart to do all sorts of tricks worthy of an Olympic gymnast. 

“Oh, hey, Y/N,” he greeted softly, probably surprised at seeing you alone at the dinner table.

“Hi, Heeseung. How was the electronics club?” You wanted to make conversation, but you winced immediately at your words - was it normal for you to know what club he had on what days?

But Heeseung seemed to pay it no mind, just smiling shyly, a blush already creeping on his cheeks. “It was nice, thanks.” He opened the fridge, taking out a carton of milk. “Do you want a glass?” When you didn’t respond immediately, he was quick to add, “Of milk? O-or orange juice? Or I can make some tea, if you want-”

His hands were already busy with preparing whatever drink he thought you might want. You held back a chuckle and smiled as you answered, “Milk is fine, thanks.”

His blush spread all the way down his neck and you turned your attention back to the puzzle so he wouldn’t see your grin. “Right, milk. Milk,” he stammered, then got two glasses out of the cupboard.

You loved moments like these with Heeseung - flustered, light-hearted, slightly awkward, moments that made you want to giggle out of nerves and delight. Basically every moment with him was like this, so it’d be more accurate to say you loved every moment with him.

“I didn’t know you liked puzzles,” he said, an upward tilt to his voice, as he set your glass next to you and took a seat across from you. He peered down at the pieces spread out in front of you, fixed his glasses on his nose, and took a big gulp of milk.

“I didn’t either,” you said with a chuckle, and stammered out an explanation when he looked up at you questioningly. “My, um, my grandma gave this to me for my birthday last month. She’s got a lot of grandkids, you know, and I think she might’ve mixed up my other cousin who likes puzzles and me…” Heeseung nods slowly, the corners of his lips tugging up in amusement. “But I don’t mind it,” you add, “I’m having fun, actually. Seeun and Chaeyeong are of a different mind, though. It’s a bit hard doing it on my own but I like it anyway.”

“I can help you,” he suddenly blurted out, and he looked just as surprised at his words as you were. “If you want.”

You smiled at him, and Heeseung and you actually looked at each other, actually held eye contact for three seconds, until you felt your face burn and had to look away. “Sure, yeah, that’d be nice.”

Although it took some time to finish the puzzle - putting 500 pieces together was a lot trickier than you thought it’d be - Heeseung and you managed to do it, high fiving celebratorily after almost two hours of hard work.

Now

“I just had a lot of fun that day.” Heeseung shrugs. “Plus, I already liked things like Legos and Rubik’s cubes, so it made sense I’d like puzzles, too.” 

You nod in response, watching as he twirls a puzzle piece between his thumb and middle finger. “It’s funny that my grandma’s mistake is what made you discover your love for puzzles.”

Heeseung chuckles along with you, and you’re relieved the atmosphere is somewhat lighter than before until he looks straight into your eyes, locking your gaze in his own, and a breath gets trapped in your throat. “I’m glad she did that, otherwise we wouldn’t be here right now.”

You’re still staring at him, dumbfounded, mouth agape, when he looks away with a smirk and turns his attention back to the puzzle, analyzing it seriously as if nothing happened. You come back to your senses after a few seconds, clearing your throat before imitating Heeseung and trying to focus on the puzzle once again. But that’s hard to do when your hands brush ever-so-slightly every time you fumble around the pile for a particular piece, or every time he hits your knee with his, inadvertently or to tease you, you’re not sure.

The first thing to do when starting a puzzle is looking for all the side pieces to build the frame. When Heeseung spots one in the pile next to you, he leans in to grab it, and he’s suddenly close enough for you to get a whiff of his cologne that had faded over the day. You think he’ll just take the piece and sit back in his seat, but instead, he turns his head towards you, and that’s when you realize just how close you are. Close enough that it wouldn’t be hard to close the gap and have your lips on his - just as the thought hits you, his eyes drift down to your parted lips. Is he thinking the same thing?

You take a sharp breath in, eyes fixed on Heeseung, mind racing with thoughts and assumptions of what might be going through his head right now. But your brain goes haywire when a smirk blooms on his lips, clearly enjoying your reaction. His gaze finds your eyes once more and he raises the piece between the two of you, in the small space that separates you. “Got it,” he says quietly, voice lower than usual. It makes your insides melt. He could be very well talking about you - he’s got you absolutely wrapped around his finger, and he seems to know it.

He turns back to the puzzle, smirk still on his lips, and you’re so embarrassed and confused that your flight instinct kicks in. The screech of your chair as you push it back and stand up makes Heeseung look up at you again, his smirk having dissolved in surprise and - disappointment?

No time to ponder, you need to get. out. of. here. 

“Right, well, that was fun, haha,” you breathe out, actually saying the word ‘haha’ and wanting to run away even more thereafter. “I should probably head back to the girls, now.” You’re already backing up and walking away when Heeseung calls out your name, but you just turn around and rush back upstairs, yelling out a small “bye, Heeseung!” on your way.

You’re already back in Seeun’s bedroom when Heeseung shakes his head at your sudden disappearance, an amused smile playing on his lips. “Cute,” he says under his breath.

-

To minimize any chances of running into Heeseung, over the next two weeks, you ask Chaeyeong and Seeun if you could hang out at your house more often, using the excuse that you want to spend as much time as possible there before leaving off to college. They don’t question it too much - next year, they’ll be able to come back fairly regularly to their parent’s houses, since the college they’re going to is less than an hour-long car ride away, but you’ll be further away, too far to come back home often.

It just so happens to be the university Heeseung is studying at, but you don’t need to worry about that right now. They had one of the best English Lit programs in your area and you’d been wanting to go there for all of your high school years - you used to think of Heeseung’s going there as a pro, but right now, it felt more like a con.

You manage to only run into him twice over the course of those two weeks, and both times, just in passing. But now it’s the night of Seeun’s birthday party and it’s impossible to pretend he isn’t there even when you’re in a crowded room together. Heeseung and Seeun’s parents have lended their house for their kids to have a party there, using it as an opportunity to have a date night, and Heeseung and his friends have graciously provided a big portion of the alcohol, saying it was their birthday gift.

You aren’t the biggest fan of alcohol, so you opt for the fruitier, lighter drinks, but still, two hours after the party starts, you can already feel your head start to spin, your voice is louder, everything makes you laugh. When a friend from school tells you they’re playing seven minutes in heaven in the hallway upstairs, you think that's the funniest thing you’ve ever heard and immediately agree to join.

The sight of Heeseung sitting in the circle, already looking at you with a lopsided smile, almost sobers you up completely.

You’d tried to avoid him as best as you could, but it was like you couldn’t escape him - maybe that was due to the fact that the heart of the party was kept to the kitchen and the living room, just a few people sitting on the stairs at the entrance to get away from the noise, but still, it annoyed you to no end that you had to keep seeing him everywhere. Maybe that was also what made the alcohol easier to down.

At some point, you were in the kitchen, doing a shot of God-knows-what with girls from school. You heard his voice before you saw him, and it made you roll your eyes but also your heart skip a beat. “Didn’t know you were such a drinker, Y/N.” You could hear the smirk in his voice, and when his face came into view, you wanted to slap it away. Or kiss it away, maybe.

“I’m not, I’m just trying to have fun,” you retorted, eyebrows slightly furrowed as you poured yourself another shot. I Gotta Feeling by Black Eyed Peas started playing in the next room and the girls shrieked before rushing to the made-up dancefloor. You wanted to join them, but something kept your feet firmly planted at the kitchen counter.

Before you could bring the shot glass to your lips, however, Heeseung stole it from you and downed it himself. “Hey!” you protested, but it was done, and he was scrunching his nose at the bitter taste, shaking his head. You wished he could stop being attractive for one damn second.

“You don’t need that to have fun.”

He placed his forearms on the kitchen counter and leaned on them, forcing him to look up at you. You had no idea what the hell he meant by that, nor did you want to try and figure it out - all you knew was that you couldn’t stay there with him when he looked at you so intently, cheeks flushed from the alcohol, hair perfectly disheveled and biceps apparent even under his t-shirt sleeves.

“You’re right, I don’t,” you made yourself say, and spun on your heels to join your friends on the dancefloor. 

And a few drinks later, here you are, sitting in a circle on the hallway floor, Heeseung right in front of you, leaning back on his palms and looking down at you with that same stupid smirk once again.

The game goes as such: one person spins the bottle twice, and the people it lands on have to go to a bedroom closet for seven minutes (timed carefully by Jake, Heeseung’s friend who is taking this game very seriously) to do whatever they want, while the others occupy themselves with other games. When the seven minutes are up, the doors burst open, and you have to leave the closet. 

And because it wouldn’t be any fun otherwise, after a few rounds, the bottle points straight at you, then straight at Heeseung, and before you know it, everyone except for Seeun is cheering, and Heeseung is holding out his hand for you to take, and you do, and he raises you up, and together, you head to his closet, as per the rules of this stupid middle-school game you should never have agreed to play in the first place. You can barely Seeun’s voice as she shouts, “Y/N, I trust you!”, which just makes Chaeyeong burst into laughter and whoop louder for you. You’d also barely registered Heeseung’s friends clapping each other’s backs, smiling like they were in on something.

The sound of the closet door shutting is what snaps you out of your daze. You hadn’t even realized Heeseung had kept your hand in his until he released it, leaning his back against one wall of the closet, facing you. All three bedrooms in the Lees’ house had built-in walk-in closets which meant you weren’t sandwiched between Heeseung and his clothes, but still, you wished you could put more distance between your two bodies - one step closer, and you were done for.

It wasn’t just Heeseung’s presence in the narrow space - it was his scent filling your nostrils, the combined smell of the cologne he was wearing, of the fabric softener on his clothes, and an unfamiliar scent you somehow recognized as unique to Heeseung, his skin, his hair, smells you’d wanted to discover for years but never got close enough to. Well, now you did. And it was intoxicating - you wanted more, wanted to bury your face in the crook of his neck and inhale. You wanted to know what his reaction would be, if he’d let you, if he’d push you away.

All those thoughts were running wild in your head. You didn’t know what to do with yourself. Your stomach was in messy knots, your hands were sweaty and you had no idea where to place them, your eyes wouldn’t stop darting around the dark room. Everywhere but Heeseung. You could feel his eyes on you, but you were too nervous to meet them.

Your breathing must’ve gotten loud enough for him to hear, because all of a sudden, you feel his hand take yours, and he’s stood up from his position against the wall, his body too close to yours for your heart to handle. His thumb rubs what he must think are comforting semi-circles on the back of your hand, but the touch just destroys any capability of thinking straight you had left.

“Y/N,” he calls out, and the sound of his voice makes your eyes close shut. You cannot give in. You had seen Seeun’s disgusted expression when you and Heeseung were picked for the game - if just the idea of you and her brother kissing repulses her, what would she say if she knew it actually happened, or if you started dating? You may have the biggest crush ever on Heeseung, but no one was worth losing your friendship with Seeun.

“Calm down,” he says, and you wish you could be as steady as his voice. “There’s no reason to be nervous.”

This makes you scoff. “You touching me is not helping my nervousness.” The words are out before you can stop them, and in the darkness of the room, you have to concentrate to make out the tilt of Heeseung’s head. You don’t need to see it to know he’s smiling, the satisfied smirk that has been gracing his features for the past month and a half.

“Yeah? Why is that?”

You take your hand out of Heeseung’s and cross your arms over your chest. “You know why,” you say, not intending your voice to come out as weak as it does.

Heeseung takes another step closer to you, and the only ray of light that comes through the panels of the closet door hits his face, making it visible for you to see. “I do, but I want you to tell me.” Another step, making you back up until you hit the wall behind you.

You call out his name shakily. His lips are right in front of you at this point, and you can’t not look at them.

He places a hand delicately on your waist, as if not wanting to scare you off. “Yeah?” He’s so close now that you can feel his breath fanning on your lips.

“We shouldn’t do this,” you say, and finally, your voice is strong like you want it to - but Heeseung isn’t deterred by it.

“Do what?” he asks, pretending to be stupid. “We haven’t done anything. Not yet.” He adds the last part in a whisper, his eyes drifting down to your lips, and you can feel your resolve crumbling piece by piece, the opposite of completing a puzzle.

“You know what I’m talking about,” you whisper back, voice almost pleading with him. Stop this before it’s too late, you want to tell him, but for some reason, at this point, you’re more scared of nothing happening than something happening.

“I do, but I want you to tell me,” he repeats, and you can’t help but let out a chuckle. Laughing helps relieve the tension, but it’s back as quickly as it left when his hold on your waist gets tighter, bringing you closer to him. Your hands that had fallen to your side come up to grab the sides of his t-shirt, gathering the fabric in your fists. There’s no going back now, you can tell - you wait for Heeseung to make a move, both dreading it and craving the relief that will come with it.

Heeseung’s free hand comes up to your face, and he traces your jawline with a knuckle before taking your chin in two of his fingers, gently raising it so that your face is angled up towards him. His touch makes your skin burn and takes away your ability to breathe properly.

“We shouldn’t do this,” you repeat, voice barely audible, a weak and half-hearted attempt at stopping this now that you still can.

“No, we shouldn’t,” he agrees, and before you can say or do anything else, Heeseung presses his lips to yours, finally, finally.

His lips are just as soft as you’d expected them to be, and the kiss is light, slow, careful. You’re grateful for it, because you’re not a very experienced kisser - if Heeseung had plunged his tongue directly into your mouth, you wouldn’t have known what to do. It’s almost like he knows this, like he’s giving you time to figure it out, to get used to it. His hand snakes its way to the small of your back, pressing you closer to him, while the other cups your cheek with his palm. You, on the other hand, have completely forgotten about your hands, only able to focus on where your lips meet.

It’s easy to fall into Heeseung’s rhythm, to let him take control of the kiss. But maybe it’s too easy, because soon enough, you start to want more - as amazing as this is right now, a slow kiss like this is not enough to have dissolved the tension in your body. You remember your hands and inch them up to his hair, your fingers finding purchase there and slightly pulling as you open your mouth just a bit wider, hoping Heeseung will get the message.

For a second, you think you’ve got it all wrong - Heeseung pulls back an inch, peering down at you. You’re both breathing heavily, and you’re scared you might have gone too far. But then, he murmurs a small fuck under his breath, and just like that, his lips are back on yours, your back is pressed against the wall again, his body encaging your smaller one. The kiss now is nothing like it was seconds ago - it’s turned hungry, hot, messy. You love it.

You had no idea you would want to kiss Heeseung like this, but now that you were doing it, you couldn’t get enough. The intensity with which he held you, the feel of his tongue against yours, the small groans that escaped his lips every time you pulled on his hair, it was all making you more drunk than the alcohol had.

You swear you haven’t even been kissing for two minutes, but then, all of a sudden, the doors are snapped open, and light pours in the closet, and Heeseung’s lips aren’t on yours anymore. You hadn’t heard the timer go off, too engrossed in Heeseung to pay anything else any mind. When you turn your head, Chaeyeong and Jake are staring at you and Heeseung, mouths wide open and eyes darting back and forth between the two of you.

“Oh. My. God,” Chaeyeong says, while Jake starts laughing. A shy smile appears on Heeseung’s lips, even plumper and pinker than usual from your kiss. His hair is a mess, and you’re sure you don’t look too different. He scratches the back of his neck, and you can’t believe this sheepish boy is the same that was kissing you roughly not a minute ago.

“Chaeyeong,” you cry out, voice already pleading as you take a step out of the closet and take both of her hands in yours. “Seeun can’t know about this.” She raises her eyebrows in surprise but nods her head in agreement, and you’ve never been so thankful for your friend as now. 

“Would she really mind?” Jake asks, looking at you, then at his friend. You turn to look at Heeseung behind you, who purses his lips.

“I’m not sure, but I have a feeling she would… She’s always told me she didn't want me hanging out with her friends,” Heeseung says, and you and Chaeyeong exchange a look; this was news to both of you.

You have no further time to discuss it, however, because Seeun’s voice calling out your name and Heeseung’s make all four of you widen your eyes. Chaeyeong fixes your clothes and hair as best as she can, then smiles at you reassuringly and nods, prompting you to imitate her. She ushers Heeseung into his bathroom and tells him to “freshen up or whatever,” and you, Jake and Chaeyeong leave the room just as Seeun reaches the door.

“Where’s Heeseung?” she asks, not a trace of suspicion in her voice, peering behind you into her brother’s dark room.

“Just needed the toilet,” Jake answers quickly, and that seems to convince her. 

She turns to you, an amused expression on her face. “Hope that wasn’t too awkward.”

You’re so surprised at your friend’s quickness to assume that nothing could happen between you and her brother, as if the idea was truly unfathomable to her, but you figure it’s for the best. You all head back into the party, Heeseung appearing some five minutes later. He scans the room for you, and when you make eye contact from across the crowded living room, he smiles, his shy, genuine smile that you’d fallen in love with all those years ago. 

You already miss him, you realize, his lips, his touch, his scent. That’s how you know that you’re in deep, deep shit.

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[leesjuicycalves]

Maybe it’s because you had deprived yourself of it for most of your life time that now you seemed to crazily demand and need it. One would think you’re a maniac, in fact, for how desperately you needed it. How desperately you needed him. It’s been over two weeks since Hyunjin, your boyfriend went on tour with the rest of his band members and it’s been the most agonizingly painful weeks of your life. You were used to him leaving for a few days or so, to work in the studio on a new track or album, but he never slept out in the period you’ve dated. You thought it wouldn’t be that big of a deal since you’ve been living fine all your life without any desires or needs, physically. But oh boy were you so wrong. Hwang Hyunjin was like a drug that you didn’t know you needed, the kind of drug that takes you to cloud nine, the type of drug that gets you into that headspace. The kind of drug that takes away all the pain that could ever exist and replace it with pure ecstasy and bliss. The kind of drug that you so needed every night for the past two weeks that you’ve been laying alone and cold in your bed.

Back in college your friends would tease you of how you scared away every boy and or girl that liked you, they said that you would spend the rest of your life alone and sad, masturbating to yourself miserably having no one to fill that void in your heart and in your pussy. You would in fact, cringe at their dumb comments and remarks saying that you found none of the people that approached you attractive or likeable. “They’re just meh for me you know,” you had once told Mina, your best friend. “Have you just considered the fact that you’re asexual?” She had asked you. You had actually considered this fact but hadn’t pried much into it and to be fair there was no one that attractive in school, they were all just so, well, meh! That was until this goofy looking guy came up to you this one time in the hallway with a red card said hi to you in the nerdiest way possible, gave you the card and scurried off after pushing back his big round glasses. You were confused that was clear, first and foremost you had never seen the guy and second who does that.

 “I like you, go out with me. Please.” That was what the card said, you couldn’t help but giggle a little at the gesture looking around the hallway to see whether the goofy looking guy was around even though you knew he was far gone. Going on that unexpected date was the best decision you seemed to have made that entire semester, you found out his name was Hyunjin and that he was a trainee at JYPE Company. You eventually ended up seeing each other more than often turning your friend’s heads and by the time both of you were done with college, you and Hyunjin were officially a couple and he had also debuted.

You were both happy of your achievements and made a promise to be there for each other no matter what, and that’s exactly what you did. Despite his many schedules that he had Hyunjin still made sure to make time for you and despite your hustle of finding a job you also made sure to be there for him and support him through his idol career. It was hard, you were not gonna lie about that. Sometimes you wished he would change his career option, but that was when you were most tired of everything. The times when he would come home too tired to listen to your conversations, the times he would cancel your dates cause of work, the times he would just stay home crying because of what stupid ass anti k-pop people would say; this was the worst period of time in your relationship. But despite the challenges that came with his career and the negativity that sometimes surrounded it, you knew you wouldn't want Hyunjin to be doing anything else. You loved seeing him on stage, doing what he loved, and you were proud of all the hard work he put into it.

Besides he always made it up to you one way or the other, he always ensured that you felt loved and cared for, cherished and treasured. The laughter you shared in your little apartment on the wholesome nights you spent together talking about everything and nothing, the little dates he took you out to when he got leaves and the amazing sex you had after was all you needed to convince you that you needed to stay and Hyunjin was worth it.

But as Hyunjin’s fame soared, the dynamics of your relationship seemed to shift. The increasing demand of his career meant less time spent together a contrast to the initial days. Yes he was still busy during the previous days but it didn’t compare to how busy he got after releasing their first full album. Balancing the desire for more of his time and understanding the sacrifices he made for your relationship (the sacrifices you also had to make) became a delicate dance, so when he told you that they had a tour coming up to promote their new album you were puzzled. Of course you were happy for him, he had accomplished so much but you missed his touch, his company, his sweet sultry voice and everything about him.

You lay in your bed staring up at the starry ceiling you remember you and Hyujin painted when you moved in your little apartment. You felt sad? Mad? Angry? Frustrated? You didn’t even know, maybe it was a mix of all these but what you did know is that you were horny and needy and so much more. If it were even possible. Hyunjin had called you earlier that day but you weren’t in the right emotion to pick up the phone so you just let it ring as tears stung your eyes. You ended up falling asleep after supposedly memorizing every star painted on your ceiling, you were so deep in your slumber that you didn’t hear Hyunjin walk in that night, you didn’t hear him giggling at your cute sleeping form. You didn’t feel the delicate kiss he placed on your forehead and you definitely didn’t feel him slip right behind you, spooning you and whispering a sweet goodnight to you. So when you wake up the next morning and feel a body pressed against your back you’re a little bit startled but calm down as soon as the scent of him fills you.

“Jinnie?” you murmur sleepily turning to face his beautiful sleeping face.

“Mmmh,” he groans before opening his eyes. “Morning baby,” he coos back at you.

“What are you doing here, I thought you guys would be done next week,” you asked sincerely shocked as you sit up on your elbow.

“Don’t you want me here baby,” he asks in a pout as he scoots closer to lay his head on your tummy.

You giggle at his antics and thread your fingers along his silky hair.

“Jinnie you know that’s not what I mean,”

“Well, there is heavy rain in Jakarta, that was our next stop so we cancelled that and I decided to come home to you my sweets,” he answers placing a soft kiss on your covered tummy.

“Oh ok. Lemme go make you something to eat then, am sure you’re hungry,” you say as a matter of fact as you make way to leave the bed but Hyunjin holds you back tighter.

“Let’s just stay like this a little bit longer, yeah,”

“I need to get to work Hyun so I have to get up anyways so let go. When did you even get here?”

“Last night, when you were sleeping. You looked cute,” he says as his hands slop under your sleeping shirt. “And peaceful. Just skip work today, for me?”  His hand stops right beneath your right breast and you can feel what you’ve been needing all those days back, his simple touch.

“We can’t do this now Jinnie. Am sure you also need rest.”

“I don’t, I slept all the way here in the plane so am ok. Just stay please.”

Honestly you also don’t know why you’re trying to run away from him, from what you’ve been wanting and needing so badly for the past two weeks. He was right there next to you, touching you, talking to you just like you wanted. Maybe it was the guilt of the all the emotions you had in the previous days, killing you from the inside.

“Baby,” Hyunjin’s sultry voice breaks you from your thoughts, he slowly lifts his head from your tummy and his hand now fully lays on top of your breast.

“I called you last night, wanted to tell you I was coming but you didn’t pick up,”

He is now straddling your hips as you lay flat on your back staring at his beautiful eyes that held all his love for you.

“I-I must have been asleep-”

“S’ alright at least I gave you a surprise,” he leans down and his soft plump lips meet yours and you swear you feel yourself ascend. His lips felt like the softest pillow made of itsy-bits of love and admiration. The kiss was slow and delicate, it was as if Hyunjin was taking his time to express his feelings trough the kiss, speaking volumes of the countless conversations missed during his absence, apologizing for all the time lost, for all the dates he canceled because of work and re assuring you that the promises you once made to each other were still alive and he intended to keep them. He kissed you fervently as if telling you that you were his future, the one he would be with forever, the one he would always come back to after a long day at work or after his tours, it was a kiss of relief for the both of you, a solace.

Hyunjin pressed his lips harder against yours almost as if he never wanted to part, never wanted to stop kissing your beautiful lips. He only pulled back when he tasted a hint of saltiness on his lips (sure of which he knew were tears and not blood since he was positive he hadn’t gone that rough). You also only realized your state when you no longer felt the comfort of his lips on yours.

“Baby, what’s wrong? Why-why are you crying? What’s the matter?” He was quick to sit up right, but not fully placing his weight on you, thumb swiping away the stray drops of tears on your flushed cheeks.

“N-nothing, just so happy you’re back,” you say barely as a whisper while you sniffle in between your statement turning your head to avoid Hyunjin’s gaze and wiping your own tears rather harshly with the back of your hand. He slowly turns you back to face him, delicately pushing your hand from your face.

“Am. Happy. That. Am. Back. Too.” He tells you punctuating every word with a peck on your eyes, nose, cheeks and lips. You smile at him, the kind of smile that he always said made his heart beat a tad faster every time. This is why you stay back, why you had the strength to keep waiting for the last two weeks. Why you still hold on despite the frustration, anger, sadness and loneliness at times. Because of his lovely existing self.

“Baby,” Hyunjin whispers, his hand that had been laying a top of your breast groping it harshly.

“Jinnie, I-I, you…..”

“Need you. I need you love, so bad.”

It is only then that you notice the clear hard on pocking at your naked thigh.

Hyunjin lowers himself once again to your lips, kissing you shortly then proceeds to place open mouth kisses on your neck and collarbone. He maneuvers to slide off the spaghetti top that you have on and within no time you feel the warmness of his lips on your breasts kissing and sucking. You grip his bare back, nails holding tight onto his flesh sure enough to leave a mark. Your body melts against is touch, completely giving him full control to do as he pleases because that’s the kind of effect that he has on you.

Hyunjin snakes his lips down your abdomen and stops at the waistband of your sleeping shorts. Your eyes that were shut the entire time shoot open at feeling his warm breath there. You both look at each other for a while, the silence in the room might seem awkward to a stranger but you relinquish comfort and trust from it knowing that your sweet love will take care of you. You frantically nod your head at him and the smirk he gives you sets you off further than he already has. Your shorts fly across somewhere in the room and you are left completely vulnerable in front of Hyunjin, he looks at your pussy as if it’s the first time he’s seen you and embarrassment suddenly washes over you. You have no time to dwell on that feeling since Hyunjin immediately takes it away by giving a long lick along your wet slick folds, he gives a somewhat hum of agreement, or is it satisfaction, and the vibrations against your folds have you moaning out.

“Missed this,” he mumbles and laps at your pussy up and down, his plump lips sucking harsh and his thick warm tongue poking at your entrance. All you can do is squirm and writhe in pleasure against the bed holding tight your velvet sheets whilst chanting his name like a holy mantra.

Hyunjin’s lips almost push you to your climax but he pulls back before anything could happen appearing right above you once more to give you another kiss but this time harsh and heated with the intend to satisfy his desire; a distraction as he works to push two of his long digits into you scissoring you open. You immediately gasp at the sudden move, back arching of the bed. Hyunjin whimpers into the kiss as his painfully hard covered dick makes contact with your exposed stomach. You reach out in between the two of you and free him from the restraints of his silky pajama, stroking him with your soft hands. This causes his fingers to suddenly poke harder inside you lightly pressing on your g spot.

“H-hyun, please, p-please,” you beg your hands no longer focusing on keeping steady strokes on his dick.

“I know angel, I know,” he answers back adding a third finger into you and speeding up the pace of his fingers. He is just as desperate to be inside you as you are to have him. After a couple of thrusts and a few seconds of sloppy kissing, Hyunjin pulls his fingers out and aligns himself with your hole placing his tip just at the entrance.

“Nggh-Jin-jinnie, hurry please,” you whine and push yourself forward trying to get his entire dick in you at once.

“Patience baby,” he says with a chuckle as he holds your hips in place and slowly starts gliding into you with a low groan. The stretch you feel from him is immaculate to say the least, you take him in fully as you hold on tightly to his forearms moaning and whimpering. Hyunjin was always caring and careful at times like this, and you appreciated that. But today was not the day for that, considering that the world had deprived you of his touch for a while, deprived you of the stretch of his dick that you never seemed to get enough of. So Hyunjin pausing to wait for you to adjust to him was simply not done, you moved forward harshly, the tip of Hyunjin’s dick hitting hard on that spongy spot inside you eliciting sound between whimper and a gasp out of him as he fell forward laying on your chest.

“Baby, y-you can’t do that,” you could hear the surprise in his voice, he clearly did not expect that.

“You’re too slow Hyunn,” you answer cockily with a smirk on your face. He doesn’t answer back but instead lifts himself up and starts moving painfully slow rubbing his dick on your walls as his hands move to knead both your breasts. “F-fuck,” you curse out gripping his back harshly. He knows exactly how you take him, slow and hard, none of that fast bullshit. He grins at your reaction slamming harder into you and kissing all over your chest.

The room was filled with your whimpers and moans, the wet sounds of his dick dragging along your slick walls, his low guttural grunts and the sound of his name coming out of your lips, sweet praises of “you’re doing well love,” and “Keep taking me so good baby,” fueling you and taking you closer to your climax. You feel yourself convulsing around him, legs trembling and arms too weak to hold onto anything. “Hy-Hyun….I’m gonna…..f-fuck,” you stop mid-sentence as he continuously slams harder into you. “Come on baby let go,” before you can administer what he’s commanding of you your walls release around him body shaking and mouth hanging open in a silent moan. It doesn’t take long for him to let go as well, filling you with his warm cum. He continues to fuck you both from your high the squelching sounds getting louder as he finally pulls out and collapses on top of you. Your hands rest on his head sweeping away the strands of hair stuck to his forehead. The room is silent for a while with nothing but your steady breathing sounds, both of you too comfortable to say a word and too comfortable to move away from each other.

#hyunjin #skz x reader #hyunjin x reader #stray kids #skz imagines #skz smut #skz x y/n #skz smau #stray kids x y/n #stray kids x you #hyunjin x you

[your-name-is-jim]

What a Kirk/Spock shipper sees in a Kirk/Female-Love-Interest story [PART 2/2]

Part 1 <- Please read Part 1 first. Part 2 won't make sense otherwise!

This panel is absolutely AMAZING and you all deserved to see it :D

So, what were we talking about? Oh, yeah, Laura just proposed.

As you can see, Jim is panicking not sure what to answer, so the first thing he does is calling his two best friends. There are so many things going on here; I'll try to mention everything I care about!

"Starfleet is getting a lot better at partners of equal rank working together."

This is an important part of this comic: apparently, in this story Starfleet isn't encouraging relationships between officers with a different rank. I know it's sort of implied in canon too, but it's not always clear if it's actually against regulations or if it's fine when the ranks are close.

As a K/S shipper, this detail just gives me an in-universe reason why Jim and Spock aren't considering dating each other in this story: a commander can't probably have a relationship with a captain. I mean, we already know from canon TOS that Jim avoids relationships with the members of his crew, so this just adds a layer to a potential forbidden love story between them. Yeah, I know this isn't what this comic is trying to do, but what can I say? Fans don't stop shipping something just because they learn it's not allowed in-universe… if anything, they can find it more exciting! :D

"We could teach at the Academy. Mind you, she laughed at that idea."

Oh, wait. Jim actually talked to Laura about their possible future together! It looks like he's thinking about them as teachers at Starfleet Academy. Hmm… this sounds familiar:

2277 — Accepts appointment to Academy faculty, moves into San Francisco apartment

This is from Kirk's biography in Star Trek official website. Between The Motion Picture and The Wrath of Khan, Jim accepts a job at the Academy. We see it at the start of the second movie, after Saavik takes the Kobayashi Maru test.

Wait, who's the other teacher here? :D

Okay, okay, in that era Jim is an admiral and Spock is a captain, so their ranks are still different, but except for that… They both teach at the Academy. And it's literally what Jim proposed to his love interest Laura in the comic! With my Kirk/Spock goggles on, what I read in that panel is "If Laura and I got married, we could both do this thing that I'm totally going to do with Spock in the future." LOL

Did the comic creators notice the parallel? Probably not. However, we K/S shippers have special skills for finding accidental implications about our ship everywhere, so here it is :)

"Your thoughts, please, Mr. Spock."

I said I had a lot to say about that single panel, so of course I can't skip the last line! A human woman has just proposed to Jim, and what does Jim do? He asks for Spock's opinion. This says a lot about Jim and Spock's friendship, and it's very sweet on Jim's part, but it also makes me think about Jim's love life. What about Jim and Laura's romantic feelings for each other? Does Jim want to spend the rest of his life with her? Perhaps the reason they don't talk about it (not even with Bones!) is that it's implied that Jim loves her and she loves him, even if they never say it. However, I still think it's interesting that Jim's discussion on the matter is mostly "logical".

Anyway, I swear I won't post every single panel of this comic, but Spock's reply is an absolute gem you all must see:

"I AM SOMETHING OF AN EXPERT ON THE SUBJECT OF JAMES T. KIRK."

(dkjflsdjlkdjglk brb losing my mind again)

Ahem. Okay, Spock. Noted. Also, wow, nice make up. Did I say that the art in this comic is great? Good.

"I believe someone of equal status would offer you the best possible chance of happiness."

Maybe I'm reading too much into it, but I find interesting his use of "equal status" instead of the more specific "equal rank". Status makes me think less of their official position in Starfleet, and more of how two people actually see each other. It's not just about Laura and Jim being both captains; it's about them seeing each other as equals.

Anyway, Jim jokes about Bones and Spock finally agreeing about something, and the conversation continues.

Jim's best friends are both encouraging him to marry Laura. In this panel, I zoomed in on Bones because his words are especially interesting. Based on everything we've seen so far, it looks like having a romantic partner when you're in Starfleet is a pain in the ass in general in this comic; however, Bones is pointing out that for the first time, Jim has someone who really understands. Of course, that's because she's a Starfleet captain too.

About Spock, I won't share the entire conversation, but I just want to say that as a K/S shipper who likes to think Spock is secretly in love with Jim in this era, I find his dialogue where he's supporting Jim's relationship with Laura totally reasonable. It's important to remember that this comic takes place close to the end of the five-year mission. We know that Spock is going to run away after that, trying to erase all his emotions in Gol. So, in this specific part of his story, I find pretty in character that he'd tell Jim to find happiness with someone else. That's what he'd do, regardless of his own feelings.

So, Jim knows his two best friends think he should say "yes" to Laura. What happens next?

During a mission, Jim meets his ex Carol Marcus. She is surprised to find out that Jim is considering settling down. This is not completely related to this analysis, so I won't post it, but I found interesting that Carol knows about every single woman Jim dated before he became captain (the only one she doesn't name is Ruth), and she even says "And that woman in 1930, what was her name?" Just… how the hell does she know? LMAO

At least Jim hasn't told her about Miramanee and Rayna (well, technically he doesn't even remember the latter), but seriously, Carol does know a lot about Jim's private life, even if it's clear she doesn't want her or their son to be part of it. (Not really related to this plot, but in case you're confused about the timeline: David is a child in this era; however, he doesn't appear in this story.)

Anyway, this is what she eventually tells him:

So, I like to think that Carol is genuinely trying to help Jim here, because the spiteful ex girlfriend is another thing I don't really want to see in 2020. I want to think that the creators meant well; however, what happens in the story is that, despite Jim not seeing himself outside the captain's chair, and despite his best friends telling him to marry the captain that is just like him… Jim keeps thinking about Carol's words.

He knows from Starfleet that he's going to be promoted to admiral the moment he reaches Earth. What is interesting here is that Jim could refuse the promotion and be a captain with Laura. This is definitely a different situation from everything else I've seen before. It's obvious to anyone who has watched TOS movies that Jim is not happy as an admiral. He didn't really want to be one. He doesn't want to be one in this comic series either (you can see it explored in Star Trek: Year Five main story). However, thanks to The Motion Picture, we also know that he will accept promotion at the end of his five-year mission. This isn't a canon divergence story: the writers can't really change any major event, so they have to work with what canon offers.

What I find interesting is that in this 2020 comic, Jim finds himself in the opposite situation he is in Gene Roddenberry's The Motion Picture novelization from 1979. In Roddenberry's novel, it's mentioned briefly that Jim starts a relationship on Earth with a vice-admiral, a woman that was basically asked to use her charm to keep Jim grounded. Jim could refuse promotion, but he finds himself lost, without his ship, without Spock, and eventually without Bones. So he tries to convince himself that a life as an admiral with a perfect woman by his side will be good for him (it will not; Jim himself will realize a year later that his lover was an "Enterprise-surrogate").

Now, I understand trying to write something fresher and more modern in this Valentine's Day special, but I confess that I find a little hard to believe that Jim would accept a promotion as admiral if the alternative was keeping both a starship AND a wife. Also, let's not forget that Spock and Bones are both telling him to choose the married captain life. So, while I totally get from a writer's point of view that if you can't change canon, you have to work with what you have, I'm also not sure that Carol reminding Jim that he's always wanted to challenge himself is enough to make him doubt everything.

I guess I can sort of see that as part of a bigger problem: Jim knows he can't be a captain for life; during his first date with Laura, as we saw in Part 1 of my analysis, he talks about it.

"I've been thinking lately about whether I could ever stop being a Starfleet captain. Whether I could ever want to. A friend of mine talks about 'infinite diversity'. That applies to the Federation, too. But here I am, only built for one thing."

So, Jim knows he has probably avoided the subject for too long. Carol is forcing him to think about it. And, more implicitly, we could say Spock and his IDIC philosophy are also making him think, even if it's not what Spock would have expected. After all, Spock told Jim to marry Laura (in the comic), and he'll tell him that being a starship captain is his "first, best destiny" (in The Wrath of Khan).

Anyway, Jim eventually decides to meet Laura and talk to her about his personal concerns. First of all, we find out that the two of them haven't called each other for six weeks. Laura is still waiting for Jim's answer, and she didn't want to call him. If you ask me, their lack of communication is yet another a big clue that perhaps getting married is not a great idea.

Well, now Jim is at least trying to talk to her.

Aaand that's how she breaks up with him.

I'm not sure how to feel about this. I mean, in a sense, Jim doesn't say "I decided to be an admiral instead of marrying you", but Laura definitely sees it that way. I think he was genuinely looking for help, but that just proves that Laura isn't the right person for him. Why marrying someone you can't communicate with? They are such a great team as captains, but it looks like that doesn't apply to their relationship. I pointed out other clues in the previous parts, and now we got this. It's interesting to see that Jim in this comic can have a normal conversation about his future with Spock, Bones, and even Carol Marcus, but not with the person he's supposed to build a future with. Unless something changes between them, it can't work out.

Anyway, this isn't the end.

A year later, when Jim is an admiral on Earth, there's a sudden emergency. A miniature black hole appears out of the deep structure of the universe (don't blame me for the science, I'm literally quoting the comic LOL) and it's attracted to Earth gravity. Short story: they're all going to die, but fortunately the Drake (Laura's ship) can cause an anti-matter implosion that will shunt the black hole outside their reality. Unfortunately, that also means the Drake will have to go inside the black hole. Laura evacuates her crew and asks Admiral Kirk to give her the order to proceed. Reluctantly, Jim tells her that he knows she'll do it, and he gives the order.

Now, please appreciate The Motion Picture aesthetic:

Okay, I know I could have chosen a panel with Jim and Laura, since this is literally their love story, but I did say this analysis was going to be biased, so here is Laura with her two closest friends instead; they would never let her risk her life alone! <3 They are very obviously meant to be a parallel to what Spock and Bones are to Jim, which is very cute to see. Now, Laura, listen to me: I know the three of you have different ranks, but you may die in a few seconds… And I just think that the few times your friends appear in this comic, you have a lot of chemistry with them, sooo maybe you should forget about Jim and just smooch one of them, or both… just saying :)

Ahem. Anyway, after Laura and her girlfriends disappear into the void, there's another timeskip. This time it's 15 years.

Oh, damn.

I said in the premise of this analysis that one of the reasons I decided to read this comic despite shipping Kirk/Spock is that, in my headcanon, Kirk and Spock get together after The Motion Picture. Until this point, this comic hasn't really gone against my headcanon. I can genuinely believe that Jim had another girlfriend during his five-year mission; it's not a big deal. Unfortunately for me, this comic has its last part taking place around The Final Frontier era. Dammit.

Well, it's just one comic. I read until this point; it'd be illogical not to read until the end, right? Nah, it's not logic. It's human curiosity. I know I won't like it, but I still want to see it.

Also, if there's something that I really don't want to see in modern media anymore, is female characters dying just to make male characters suffer. I can accept that in TOS show because it was made in the 1960s, but even TOS movies got better about it! Characters like Saavik and Gillian can have their own lives without having to die for a man's pain. It's not a coincidence that the writers had to kill Spock to make Jim suffer. Without digressing too much, I just wanted to say that K/S bias aside, I went into this comic hoping to read something different from another dead woman for Jim. I'm very glad that, at least about this, the comic creators didn't disappoint me!

So, in this story, it's been 15 years since Laura's disappearance (actually, it should be more, but I'll try not to nitpick, despite being the trekkies' favorite hobby :D). Anyway, the one with the whales The Voyage Home happened, and Jim is not an admiral anymore. He's happy to have a starship again, but he hasn't stopped questioning his life decisions.

We can also see that, 15 years later, he's reading the book Laura liked.

HOLD IT! WAIT WAIT WAIT! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??? WHAT THE--

*inhales deeply*

(Friendly reminder to myself that what is obvious to me may not be obvious to everyone else, so I need to explain. Fine. I'll try.)

The screenshots I posted are from The Wrath of Khan, right after Spock's funeral. What Jim is doing there is reading the end of the book that Spock gave him for his birthday. He's mourning Spock.

In the comic panel, Jim has a new pair of glasses, because it takes place a little later in the timeline. But, except for that…

It's the same scene.

The same fucking scene.

I mean, come on! I can't even post the "they're the same picture" meme, because it's not funny if they're literally the same picture! Even the bookmark is the same!

The comic creators literally took a canon scene about Jim reading Spock's book after Spock is gone, and they redrew it with Jim reading Laura's book after Laura is gone. In a Valentine's Day special. Where Laura is Jim's love interest. They made a romantic scene with Jim and a woman that was originally about Jim and Spock.

(Brb, I'm going to chew a pillow until I calm down.)

So. Well. If you wondered why I thought there was something about Kirk/Spock in this comic… you have your answer. Perhaps the artist didn't think anything about it. I certainly do.

And I guess someone could say, "But Jim is still reading Laura's book 15 years later! That's true love!" Why yes, he's not reading Spock's book 15 years later, because he didn't stay without Spock for 15 years; he risked everything and lost all the most important things in his life to save Spock's soul.

Anyway, back to the comic. Starfleet receives a signal from the edge of Federation space. It's the Drake. Laura and her friends are alive.

Jim and Laura have a reunion after a long separation. Since they're both captains now, Jim thinks they are given a second chance.

Oh, whoops.

It's her turn now. It looks like being away for 15 years has changed her (as you can expect, honestly), and she's now glad to become an admiral. In this comic, that means Jim can't marry her. So, this is how the story ends:

So. Um.

This isn't a bad ending, but I also wouldn't exactly call it a happy ending. It's certainly not a happily ever after story. I'd call it open, maybe hopeful? Honestly, pretty much what I'd expect from a love story between an original character and Jim, so I can't say the writing is disappointing about that.

On the other hand, I can't personally imagine middle-aged Jim being so eager to start a romance again with someone he hasn't seen in 15 years who broke up with him 16 years ago. Perhaps he felt guilty about Laura's disappearance because if he had married her, they would have been part of a colonization fleet somewhere else and the incident wouldn't have happened the same way? Maybe. Personally, I would have found more believable an ending where Jim asks her to have dinner together or go for a walk, and then something romantic happening as they get to know each other again. But I can see why the creators wanted to bring up the marriage proposal again, just to close the circle. The comic is just 32 pages, so they did what they could.

"Unless there's someone else." "Not so much. I've been really busy."

Busy with what? Oh, right: Spock's death, Spock's body on Genesis, Spock's rebirth on Vulcan, the time travel (okay, that one wasn't 100% Spock-related), Spock's brother… Honestly, just say there's been a lot of Spock in your life, Jim, because that's the truth :)

On a more serious note, I guess that dialogue could mean that Jim has someone, but "he's been too busy" to do anything serious with them. However, as a K/S monoshipper I don't really like the idea of Jim being in an open relationship with Spock, so Jim's character in the entire scene in the end is just a big NOPE for me. Sorry.

That said, I found very interesting that in a few panels they show very clearly the "captain" rank on Jim and Laura's shoulders, to point out that it's the same. They can't be together forever, but they can have fun for a few days as captains. Because of that, I went back to the start of the last timeskip, just to check out something:

Fascinating.

This is a pretty detailed panel, where you can see the ranks on the shoulders of Jim's friends; the colors of their pins are also pretty good, close to the ones in the movies… except for Spock's.

Oh, please. Did you really expect me not to pay attention to this? :)

Captain Kirk and Captain Spock.

And unlike Laura, this is what they are until the end! The end of a very long life! Generations? What's Generations? Spock will eventually become an ambassador, but that's just a different job. How did Spock himself put it earlier in this comic?

"I am something of an expert on the subject of James T. Kirk. And I believe someone of equal status would offer you the best possible chance of happiness."

Did the comic creators just play themselves? I don't know, I'm quoting their own story here! LOL

And what about Jim's words from the same scene? :D

"Starfleet is getting a lot better at partners of equal rank working together."

Partners. Of equal rank. Working together.

That's literally what Kirk and Spock are since the end of The Voyage Home! Without an expiration date!

The comic creators made a big deal in their universe about relationships being better between two captains, and how good Jim and Laura may have been for each other if they had married as captains; and now they can't have their happily ever after because Laura is going to be an admiral… But even if the comic tries to hide it, we know there is a captain in Jim's life. And to make things better, Jim lost his admiral rank to bring him back. Listen, I'm a huge Old Married Kirk/Spock fan, so there's no way anything can make me forget that in the last TOS movies they're both captains. And there's no way I can forget that Jim risked his entire career (and everything else!) for Spock, and that's literally why he's not an admiral anymore.

This is almost ironic in this Valentine's Day comic. If it hadn't been for Spock, Jim would have still been an admiral, and he could have married Laura. Whoops. Too bad.

Speaking of admirals, I didn't notice it at first, but there's also something about this line Laura says in the last panel I posted…

"And don't you dare 'Admiral' me."

Ah, yes, a typical thing you tell someone you're planning to have sex with. Right, Laura? Agreed :)

Honestly, at this point I should just stop checking this comic, because I wonder if I'd just end up finding a Kirk/Spock version of every Kirk/Laura Rhone line LOL

By the way, I have other thoughts to share now that the story is over, but there's one more thing first. Do you remember the last panels of the comic? Middle-aged Jim and Laura kiss; END.

Okay. After that, the comic has a picture of the cover, with Jim and Laura kissing when they're younger.

And then it has this:

dklsfjlskjflskjlksjlkdlkgjdlfgsnfjekniuwanf LISTEN, HOW--

Just how am I even supposed to say anything that makes sense about this…??? I'm just… I can't…

Okay. So. We're talking about a Valentine's Day comic. It makes sense for it to include a cute Valentine card. I also get that Spock's iconic line has become so mainstream that it can be quoted out of context. And you can make parodies.

But… But… A Star Trek TOS fan can't really forget the original context of "I have been and always shall be your friend"? Someone could just not think about it, I guess… But, well, I know that at least I can't forget that this is literally Spock's line to Jim rewritten in a romantic Valentine's Day version. I can't possibly NOT think about it!

And I know it's very possible that the people who worked on the comic story weren't even aware of this extra, but the fact that I'm seeing this after reading about Jim Kirk's romance without happily ever after… Jim kisses a woman he can't stay with forever, and then there's Spock's "I have been and always shall be your Valentine". It's just so fucking funny. I can't. If I was feeling a little down after seeing middle-aged Jim wanting to marry Laura, now I'm laughing again. Thanks, Spock's silly Valentine card. I needed it! :D

Anyway, what did I say about this comic taking things originally created for Kirk and Spock's relationship and making them romantic when they're not about them? I can believe that sometimes it's a coincidence, but this card? Please… In a sense, this is the perfect ending.

---

Conclusions.

I started this comic with a question: in 2020, how do you write a story about TOS Kirk falling in love? I wanted to see this attempt. Overall, I think the creators did what they could. Laura is different from every other woman in Jim's life; they didn't kill her off, and they also didn't force a happy ending. I think they did a good job with the canon limitations they had, especially in 32 pages.

Do I believe that Laura could have been a good match for Jim in different circumstances?

As a temporary girlfriend? Yes.

As a lifelong partner? No.

Of course, I'm aware my answer is biased, but I can try to be a little more "logical" about it.

First of all, I think that the comic itself supports my interpretation: of course, like in every story, different people are going to see different things; however, as I already pointed out, Jim and Laura never say that they love each other, and before the marriage proposal their relationship is pretty casual.

In The Original Series, Jim isn't lucky when it comes to romance because the women he falls in love with can't really understand his nature as a space explorer. Sometimes they can, like in Carol's case, and that's why they break up with him. Laura is the opposite, because she's just like Jim. But here is the thing: I think Laura is too much like him.

What would have happened if Jim had accepted to marry her at the end of the five-year mission? They would have been both captains. On different ships, though. Sure, they could have been part of the same colonization fleet, as Jim says in the comic, and maybe it would have worked for a while. However, would they really have seen each other as much as Jim needs?

I don't know about Laura, but we see multiple times in canon that behind his mask as a starship captain, Jim is definitely more lonely than what someone may think.

First of all, don't get me wrong: in these screenshots from The Naked Time, Jim is single, so of course his attraction to Janice Rand is related to that. It's not the same situation he'd be in if he were married to Laura. Early in the series, he has thoughts about his yeoman exactly because he doesn't have anyone else. Contrary to his fame as a womanizer, TOS Jim in canon always has one woman at a time in his mind, never more.

So, why am I sharing those lines? To show that when Jim is always inside the Enterprise, he does feel lonely. He needs a romantic partner's physical touch. However, we also know that Jim does not want a relationship with one of his subordinates, so Janice Rand and the rest of his crew are off limits.

Laura is good for him because she's part of Starfleet, and not a subordinate. But is that really enough? From what I've seen in the comic, no. At the end of the day, it looks to me that Jim and Laura don't really know how to plan a future together. Perhaps it's because they're so similar, but they don't really think of themselves as a couple, especially Laura. There's Captain James T. Kirk and Captain Laura Rhone; they both love their ships, so they should get married? That's not how it works.

Their relationship is casual. Jim doesn't want to define it. Are they friends with benefits? Are they in an open relationship? Either way, when Laura decides to marry him, she asks around if Jim has someone else, and only after that she asks him. Jim, on the other hand, doesn't talk to her for six weeks after her proposal. He talks to Spock and Bones immediately, but not to her. He even talks to Carol first.

Then, when Jim finally tries to talk to her about his problems, she doesn't listen. Their lack of communication is the cause of their break up.

16 years later, what we see is even worse. It's obvious that Laura has just different priorities. Maybe it's because of what happened to her lost in space, but I'm not sure. If they had married at the end of the five-year mission, would have Laura always refused a promotion to admiral? Would she have tried to get a promotion with Jim? Based on what we see in this comic, it doesn't look likely to me.

Now, as I said, different people are going to see different things, so I'm sure that someone really invested in this romance can imagine that Jim and Laura are really meant to be, and they can get their happy ending after their retirement, or in other ways. However, I admit that Jim and Laura's huge communication issues make hard to me to picture a long happy relationship between them. They should both try to get better, but in those 32 pages there was no hint towards that direction.

There's another thing that makes really hard to find any love interest for Jim as a plausible "happily ever after" option: the stakes. I know that it's just a single comic, so the creators had to focus on a few things; however, I couldn't help but notice that Jim and Laura never really save each other from dangerous situations. They work together as a team, and Jim watches Laura disappearing into the void, but does he do anything about it? Does he try to reach her inside her ship before she disappears into the black hole? Does he try to bring her back from the void? No, he doesn't.

In TOS show and movies, Jim Kirk risks so much for his crew and his ship that a Star Trek fan can't believe that a new woman is the love of his life, unless Jim is willing to do for her everything he does for his friends. And honestly, after The Search for Spock… how can he even come close to do that?

And it's not just about Jim's actions. There's his language too. At the start of the third movie, Jim refers to Spock as "the noblest part of myself". What could he say about a love interest that is as deep as this?

Let's be honest here: the reason it's so hard to write a story about Jim Kirk's true love is that the real love story for him has already been written. You may not see it romantically, but Kirk and Spock's story is absolutely a love story. And when a character has someone he loves so deeply, it's not easy to convince the audience that he could have someone new to love as deeply. In Jim's case, the combination of his personality and his canon life makes it almost impossible.

Anyway, before I end up not so accidentally turning this analysis into a complete Kirk/Spock ship manifesto, I'm just going to mention one silly thing about the Valentine's Day comic. Please, don't take it too seriously, I'm half-joking :)

So, there are two kiss scenes in the story: one when Jim and Laura start to spend a lot of free time together, and one in the last panel. Well, I can't believe Jim isn't holding Laura's shoulders when he kisses her! That's just the basis of the way Jim kisses women! D:

Different Star Trek characters kiss in different ways; it fits their personalities. And because the rest of my TOS posts are probably too gay for these gifs, I'm dropping them as references here:

Sorry, but if Jim Kirk doesn't grab someone's shoulders before a kiss, it just kills my immersion! :P

Okay, a little more seriously: Jim doesn't always kiss women the same way; however, his "shoulder grab" is common enough that you definitely notice it if you pay attention. Because of that, I think it would have been nice to include it in the Valentine's Day comic.

After reading this comic, what kind of person would I consider perfect for Jim?

Well, my answer is obvious. However, I'll try to elaborate.

First of all, this story definitely convinced me even more that Jim can only be really happy with another Starfleet officer (or at least someone who's been deeply involved with Starfleet). He also needs someone who understands him as a space explorer, without trying to keep him grounded. And someone very smart, of course. These are all traits Laura has. But they're just the basis.

I don't think Jim needs someone in command of their own ship as a lifelong partner. As I said before, I can't really imagine it working out. Another starship captain would have their own goals and their own ambitions; that doesn't mean Jim shouldn't marry someone with specific plans for their own career, but I think these plans should keep the two of them close, not on different ships. Jim needs his partner physically at his side; if he could be happy in a long-distance relationship, I believe we would have seen at least one working out in canon. But it's never the case. Working on different starships from the same fleet would be a little better, but in my opinion not enough, unless it's for a short period of time.

And there's also the matter of his partner's personality. Jim is a natural leader; that's why he's so good at his job. I don't think he needs a similar kind of leader as romantic partner. This is just my personal opinion, but I believe they would just fight about everything they disagree about. I think he needs someone calmer in his life, not someone who'd encourage emotional outbursts.

More importantly, he absolutely needs someone he can communicate with. If he can't talk to his partner about everything important, they're not the right person for him. That doesn't mean they can't have disagreements or miscommunication issues, of course, but they shouldn't happen all the time, and Jim and his partner should be able to talk about them and make up.

In conclusion: someone at his side on his ship, smart, calm, trustworthy :)

Now, I know what some of you are thinking about: what about the "no relationships with subordinates" personal rule Jim has? How can Jim be in a relationship with Spock (or anyone else on the Enterprise) if he's everyone's superior officer? Well, first of all, I already said that after The Voyage Home, Jim and Spock are both captains. And before that… I think that Spock in the comic phrased it the right way. Jim can find his happiness with someone of "equal status". I think it's pretty clear, in my opinion, that Janice Rand and Spock aren't the same kind of subordinates to Jim. Just think about it: which members of the Enterprise call their captain "Jim"? Bones, Spock and (occasionally) Scotty. These are the three people I believe are "equals" in private to Jim, no matter their ranks when they're on duty. Because of that, a relationship between Jim and Spock could work pretty well.

By the way, another thing the Valentine's Day comic made me think about is that in TOS movies, Jim sort of does with Spock pretty much everything he does with Laura in this story. Not the same way, of course, but does it matter? Spock is his own person, he's not Jim's copy. That doesn't mean he can't indulge Jim, have fun himself… and try to stop Jim from doing dangerous things "for fun", as an old spouse would :)

Okay, perhaps throwing each other into the water doesn't count as dancing, but it's so much better :D

In conclusion, this is the way I can read the Valentine's Day comic as a Kirk/Spock shipper:

Jim mentions Spock on his first date with a woman.

Jim questions his life choices as he thinks about Spock and IDIC philosophy.

Jim does with Laura everything we see him doing in TOS show, except for playing chess (just the thing he does with Spock).

Jim says Laura and him are a good team in Starfleet because they had a lot of sex (is that true about other people he works well with??)

There haven't been many ladies or gentlemen in Jim's life because he's busy (not because he's not into men, apparently).

"Starfleet is getting a lot better at partners of equal rank working together." Good for your future with Spock, Jim!

If Jim and Laura got married, they could both teach at Starfleet Academy, something Jim is totally going to do with Spock someday.

Mister "I am something of an expert on the subject of James T. Kirk" Spock.

Also, Mister "I believe someone of equal status would offer you the best possible chance of happiness" Spock, which is actual foreshadowing of his own future status with Jim.

Hey, look at Jim reading a book that reminds him of his lost love! I wonder where I've seen LITERALLY THE SAME PICTURE???

"Don't 'Admiral' me". This is totally not similar to what Jim tells Spock in The Voyage Home, of course.

Hey, we're both captains now! Just for a few days, but isn't that great? I wonder if anyone else is a captain now, and forever? :D

"I have been and always shall be your Valentine". Totally not a Kirk/Spock line, I don't know what you're talking about! :)

Okay, okay, that's all.

As a Kirk/Spock shipper, I won't deny that I'm a little jealous of this Valentine's Day special comic, because I wish we could get something with amazing art like this where Jim is in love with Spock. On the other hand, Star Trek: Year Five comic series has a few scenes about Jim & Spock's friendship that I really liked. Platonic, sure, but good enough for my K/S goggles!

Thank you so much for reading this post until the end! I hope you enjoyed my analysis! Live long and prosper!

#star trek analysis #star trek: year five #star trek: year five valentine's day special #star trek comics #james t. kirk #laura rhone #spirk #star trek tos #star trek the original series #k/s #kirk x spock #space husbands #my gifs

[songsofadelaide]

Joined in a dream

cw/tw: no curses AU set in the 2020s, birthday fic, female reader, established relationship, fluff, slice of life, another marriage proposal, popular teacher!gojo x private kind of gf— gojo decides to gift himself... a wife. wc: 685

Satoru proposed to you in the quietest way possible— in the confines and comforts of your shared bedroom, away from people's peering eyes. It caught you off-guard, too, the way he presented you with the ring in a velvet box that seemed to have been opened and closed a lot. He must have rehearsed the whole thing so many times that the box was already worn out.

For someone so ostentatious, you'd expect him to propose in front of a crowd, or your friends, at least… But he did this in a way so intimate that you couldn't help but question his motives— and if you truly knew him at all.

Satoru was an unforgivably loud person. He was a teacher, after all. Your friends called him Mr. Congeniality. He was always the talk of the town and always the life of the party— He was expected to be everywhere even though he was busy with his job but his social battery was always fully charged.

On his 30th birthday, he decides to gift himself one of the most important things he could ever want and he could ever ask for.

When you were both tucked in bed and ready to turn in for the night, he fished out the box from his bedside drawer and held it out to you.

"I could have easily asked our friends for help with this," he chuckled in an attempt to mask the nervousness in his voice. "They could have helped me plan something grand, but I know that grandiosity really isn't your thing."

"S-Satoru?…"

"I know it's always a riot with me. We're never not surrounded by our friends and it gets pretty tiring at times," he said, finally lowering the ring box but raising his glassy blue gaze to hold your own. "But would you please do me the honour of being my hiding spot, my safe space, like always?"

Satoru took your hands in his, warmly and tenderly. Though always surrounded by people, he was never really an open book. There was still some reticence in his usual smile, and it gave you so much pleasure that it was only you he would open up to so willingly.

His lips curled up to a crooked smile. "Spare me from the loneliness of not having you by my side every morning. Spare me from the solitude of having dinner alone when we can share in each other's days while enjoying our meal. Release me from this uncertainty that one day, you'll just get up and leave because you can't handle all the commotion I bring…"

He ran his thumbs over your freezing knuckles, attempting to warm them up with his touch. "Marry me, won't you?"

And when you smiled right back at him, he knew just what you were about to say.

"We could have a party with our friends or a party for two. It doesn't matter to me at all. In the chaos or in the quiet, I will always choose to be with you, Satoru. I know that you'll always find ways to find the fun in our simple, mundane life together," you finally answered him, squeezing his hands right back. "So sure… Of course I'll marry you."

"You know I did this so I could savour the way your eyes lit up when you saw the ring," he said with another small laugh as he eventually slid the ring on your ring finger so you could finally marvel at it. "There are just some things I don't want others to see. That includes this, I guess…"

"You proposed at the most perfect time, too," you told him, scooting over to his side of the bed so he could embrace you. "You and I share a pillow, after all. There's no way we won't be joined in a dream tonight."

"The sweetest dream, guaranteed," Satoru stated with another laugh as he welcomed you into his arms. He was certain now that he was your hiding spot— a corner of the world just for the two of you— just as you were his.

Author's notes: Happy birthday, Toru! 🥺🩵🍰 This is my second intimate proposal fic and I have so many feels about this one because I'm also not a grandiose kinda girl lol. 😆 I'm looking forward to reading a lot of Gojo fics later today (tomorrow), too! Hope you enjoy this simple one as well. 🩵

#songsofadelaidewrites💛 #jujutsu kaisen #gojo satoru x reader #gojo x reader #gojo satoru x y/n #gojo satoru x you #gojo fluff #happy birthday gojo satoru 🥺 #gojo day! #🍰

[misguidedasgardian]

Blurred Lines (6)

VI. The Grand Finale

MASTERLIST

Summary:  Endings, beginnings and crossroads 

Warnings: Cursing, cheating, adultery, talks about body shaming, therapy, misogynistic undertones (“man of the house” and whatnot), Harwin is not a good person on this… and Jace isn’t either, implied tampering with birth control, spy cameras, a bit creepiness, pregnancy, inappropriate relationship MIGHT MISS SOME WARNINGS

+ 18 MINORS DNI

Wordcount: 3,4 k

Notes: THE END TO THIS KINKY STORY! Sorry for the delay… I have been so blocked its funny and sad

Pregnant

The small screen teased you, but soon the vision was blurry because of your tears 

This couldn’t be happening, just couldn’t… You took those bloody pills religiously, you…

It was completely possible, you chided yourself, this was a perfect timing, four months since the first week you and Jace…

You whined, sitting on the toilet in the bathroom

What were you going to do?

Gods, you were going to be a single mother of two

Two children

Two under two…

You whimpered in fear, hugging yourself as you sat in the closed toilet

What did you do?

How were you going to move forwards?

Gods, what were you going to tell Harwin? You HAD to keep seeing him because of Aerea, what were you going to tell him when he catches on that you are pregnant again? Gods… you were going to get a divorce and you were going to need to prove that it wasn’t his so… You whined

You were almost thankful Jace was now out of the picture, got bored of you and left, you felt almost relieved.

But at the same time, it frightened you

Are you going to be able to do this alone?

Well, your job had incredible benefits and a daycare and… you could work from home and… you whined again

You loved children, you didn’t want to interrupt the pregnancy, you specially loved this little one inside of you, you always wanted a big family

You whipped you tears off of your face, you grabbed your things, and you went to work as nothing was happening.

Everything was going to be alright, it had to be

The news at your job was received happily, all things considered, and as a few weeks went by, you were getting accustomed to the idea, of course, you HAD to tell Harwin at some point, but that is something you were not ready to face yet.

Aerea was with him this week and that gave you time to daydream about the nursery you were going to prepare in the room that wa supposed to become your study 

You dropped your bag and coat on one of the couches and sighed loudly, your stomach grumbled, you were being hit constantly with weird cravings and you were dreaming about chicken nuggets with that special edition sauce of the movie “Prehistoric Valyria”, you grabbed the phone and make the order, and you waited patiently for it to arrive

And then the doorbell rang. You were surprised since it had been only like 20 minutes, you went straight to the door and opened without even looking through the “peephole”, Gods you were going to wish you had

You opened the door and when you saw who it was, you gasped, dropping your phone to the floor. He chuckled, with that devilish smirk you knew all too well. 

“Jace! What are you doing here?”, you asked as soon as he entered your apartment, he grabbed your phone from the floor quickly, he didn’t give it back to you, he just looked around with a shy smile. 

“You are not happy to see me?”, he teased, finally looking back at you, “I would have let you know I was coming but you blocked me so…”, he teased, he wasn’t even angry or mad you blocked him.

“How did you know I was here?”, you asked then, because his timing was… very particular, he had always been… precise in his timing, it was concerning. 

“I asked around”, you didn’t believe he asked Harwin, but he was a Targaryen, he had the resources

“You are supposed to be at college!”, you said then, worried

“I dropped out”, he said lightly

“No…”, you whined, “Jace, no! you are going to ruin your career”, you said, worried and concerned. He now didn’t seem to be the testosterone-driven young guy, he only seemed to be… someone else

“My business took off”, he said plainly, “I’ve come here to tell you…”, he said then, trying to lighten up the mood

“Well, I am happy for you”, you said back, not really knowing what this might be about, “and you discovered where I was, and came all the way here… to tell me that?”, you murmured

“No silly". He said smiling widely, “I’m here to prove to you, I’m a grown man that can take care of himself and care for you too”, he said simply, that…. you were not expecting 

“What are you talking about?”, you asked, truly concerned 

“We are great together, and now, we can finally be together, a couple, you are divorcing my father aren’t you?”

“Yes, but that doesn’t mean…”

“Yes it does”. He said, “we are great together are we not?”, he asked, his eyes looked all over your body, like he was looking for something in particular, made you feel uncomfortable 

“That we are good at fucking doesn’t mean we are good together and at being a couple”, you said bluntly, you did not like where this was going, “and furthermore, Jacaerys, this should have never happened in the first place, I don’t want to be with you anymore”, you said, looking everywhere but his eyes, you crossed your arms over your chest. You hear him laugh bitterly. But he didn’t seem angry, if anything, he seemed entertained 

“Sure”, he mocked, “cut the shit! what is really going on?”, he demanded 

“I mean it, Jace!”, you whined, but you didn’t, Jace sighed, rubbing his face in frustration, but then, he looked at you, really, really looked at you, and then, he smiled. he walked towards you, letting him, he placed his hands on your hips, it seemed like a soft gesture 

“You are pregnant, aren’t you?”, he said with a big smile, you frowned

“No, I’m not!”. The doorbell rang, and you rushed to open it, the delivery man handed you the package without further delay

“Enjoy your chicken nuggets with the special edition sauce”, he said, and left without even glancing at your direction. You turned around looking guilty with your treat in your hands

“The only time I have ever seen you eat chicken nuggets is when you were pregnant with Aerea”, he said with a cheeky smile on his lips. “You are a terrible liar!”, he mocked

“Whatever the answer to your question is, it doesn’t concern you”, you continued, you needed to fight this battle, and you needed to win it, of all the scenarios in your head, Jace being the active dad wasn’t in any of them, less of it you being together as a couple and having this child. 

“Oh, it doesn't concern me?”, he mocked, “I wonder is you reproduce on your own like the dragons in Jurassic Valyria, which the limited edition sauce came from, by the way”. he snapped, and you growled angrily 

“It might be Harwin’s”, you lied shamesly, not only admitting it, but now he finally showed some anger, he froze on the spot, his dark brown eyes looking for any glimpse of a lie 

“What? when?”, he demanded, jealous and angry

“It has to be!”, you said, more convincingly, maybe if you gaslit yourself you were going to be able to gaslight him as well, “it only happened once, but it was when he had moved back in, one night I didn’t want to get out of my room, I forgot to take the pill, and that night he…entered my room, we chatted and we did it”

Yes you were relying on placebo pills, Jace thought, good for nothing pills and you were using that to determine the paternity of the baby that it was obviously his

“What happened?”, he asked gently, trying to contain his anger

“He came at night… I had some wine…”, Jace opened his eyes in rage, he shaked and you honestly thought that he was going to start hitting the walls or something

“You are lying to me”, he said with certainty, and you needed to keep yourself together, “I’m gonna kill him!”, he grunted

“No!”, you said quickly, “it doesn’t matter, because he doesn’t know, yet… and I’m not going back together with him either way”, you tried to deviate from the conflict and massive lie

“We will come back to killing him later, but it doesn't matter, it is mathematically impossible for him to be the father, if you only did it one time, that baby is mine!”, he said, convinced 

“Jace, please”, you begged him, now desperately, how can he be so thick-headed? 

“You are going to make him think its his?”, he asked, angrily, “I’m sure you are lying to me, and you didn’t even fuck him, you want to drive me away”

“No Jacey, I’m not going to make him believe its his, but it doesn’t matter!” you whined, “of course I want to drive you away! take the win, alright?”

“What do you mean by that?”, he asked, frowning

“I’m not holding you up to this, I can do it alone…”, you said convincingly

“But I want to…”, he said back 

“No you don’t! please, this will ruin your life Jace”

“Ruin my life?”, he asked, “I came back for you! we'll be together, you, me, our babies”

“Jacaerys!”, you called, desperately, he was making this so much difficult that it had to be

“You want to be with me! I want to be with you!”, he said, increasingly more desperate, “I don’t buy a word you are saying”

“But this is way more complicated Jace”, you said, “please I don’t want to drag you into this”

“It takes two to dragondance my love, we are in this together”, he said softly, caressing your upper arms 

“Its Harwin’s”, you said, “it is the only time I missed the pill, it had to be”, Jace wanted to scream

“I want a paternity test”, he said gently. “there are none-invasive ones…”

“I’m aware”, you said

“Are you keeping this up?”, he asked, “you know it's mine, I know you would have never let him touch you again, don’t fight this anymore”, he said gently coercing you, and gods it was working. Why did he have to be who he was? your husband’s son? you only looked at the floor between you as you felt his big warm hand on your arms, trying to coarse you into looking into his eyes, effectively losing the battle 

“It's mine, you and I together, and our babies, is the only thing I’ve ever wanted”, he said softly as a siren’s song

“You don’t know what you are saying”, you whined, eyes filled with tears, “please Jacey, I don’t want to ruin your life, you already dropped off, I… I’m going to ruin you”, you cried

“You didn’t ruin anything… you helped me, you gave me space, and time, and because of you, me and my friend’s little company if being featured in the Citadel’s and… we are coming in green the first year”

“What?”, you whined

“I dropped out because I’m already a fucking millionare”, he said with a wide smile, “and I need to focus a fifty percent on the business”

“What about the other fifty percent?”, you asked

“To you, Aerea, and our baby”, he said softly, you sighed 

“Jace, you don’t even know…”

“WHY DOES EVERYONE KEEP SAYING THAT?”, he didn’t yell, but you can tell he was getting exasperated

“Jace! you don’t know what is like… the last time I got pregnant, it was a horrible pregnancy, you are not going to want to be with me anymore once I start bloating like a blowfish…”, you tried him by other fronts

“My father was a cunt”, he muttered, “I’m not my father…”

“You think in the romantic part, not in the real one, sleepless nights, showerless days, having and raising a child is hard, and though…”

“I know that, from all my siblings, I was actively involved in three of the births and first years”, he said gently, you shook your head

“Please, leave now, because if you leave in the middle I…”, bitter tears started falling down your eyes, “I will not be able to take it, please!”, you tried to get away from him, but he just wouldn’t let you, he grabbed you and hugged you tightly against his chest, and you just sobbed

“You will be alright, I’m here”, he said, caressing your back softly, you couldn’t see it, but oh how was he smiling, “You won’t have to worry about a thing love, I will take care of you…”

He was so good with Aerea, he was so good with his little siblings, maybe… just maybe…

You could just, let go

He leaned in, kissing your cheek, you were so tired, so emotionally drained that you let him kiss your tears off your cheeks, and then his greedy mouth started kissing you in the neck, right up to that sweet little spot that made you moan.

Gods… you were so sensitive, and he was so… delicious

The damage was done right?

You didn’t want to fight it anymore. You surrounded his strong shoulders with your arms drawing him more to you. Gods you had been so sensitive, so horny the past few weeks, it was the hormones, you thought, but no matter… No more trying to resolve this “issue” alone, you had him.

Oh Gods, you were expecting his child, Jace’s child, he didn’t abandon you, he was just finishing some matters that he needed to attend to, his plan was coming back… for you… 

You didn’t know if you wanted to throw up or feel incredibly relieved

He sucked on your pulse joint making you see stars, and moaned shamesly, Gods you had missed this, missed him, who were you kidding? he growled, like an animal in heat, and grabbed you by the thighs, making you surround his hips with your legs. He took you to your bedroom, and almost dropped you in the bed, his shirt was already out of him by the time he caught onto you, devouring you again. He was hungry for you and you for him, well, for any kind of contact actually 

“You are so fucking mean, trying to keep me away”, he growled, literally ripping the clothes off of your body, “keeping my baby from me”

“Jace”, you tried to chide

“Keep pretending I’m not the best fuck you ever had”. he continued, kissing down your neck, biting too, “Nobody can fuck you like I can, nobody can breed you like I can”, his hands sneaked under your panties, and to no one’s surprise, you were soaked. You moaned when he sneaked two fingers in, fingering you, squelching noises making you shiver with embarrassment, but it was easily beaten by the pleasure he made you feel.

He didn’t make you beg, gladly, in a few minutes he was fucking you slowly, not stopping but slowly, letting you adjust to his size, gods he was so big. He filled you so perfectly 

“Fuck I missed this cunt”, he grunted with a smirk

“Ever the romantic”, you grunted, which turned into a moan because of a hard thrust 

He took you in your bed, kissing every spot on your body, he made love to you desperately and sensually, making all the walls you put up stumble.

You were surprised to see a phone call from Harwin the next morning, and you raised your head to see it, Jace having you trapped between his arms as he was sleeping.

“Hey Harwin, is Aerea alright?”, you asked

“She is fine, we were just… putting everything in boxes around the house and, I found some cameras? I really wanted to say that I’m so sorry for making you feel you had to install cameras in our home to prove my infidelity, I never brought her home, I wanted you to know”, he said, he sounded so conflicted. But you frowned

“Cameras? What are you talking about Harwin?”, you asked

“I found a camera in our room, and then another in the living room”, he said, now he was truly concerned, you could hear it

“They aren’t mine”, you said, sitting on the bed, Jace grumbled at your side, but didn’t wake, or at least, you thought so

“If they are not yours, and they are not mine, who are they?”, he asked. You whined, concerned, was it Aemond? no, there was no possible way he could have installed cameras in your place, no way, at least he sneaked in, but that sounded so insane, you didn’t even entertain that possibility. You stood up from the bed to continue the conversion in private.

“I’ll send you a picture”, immediately you checked it, it was a small round camera, cordless, in the side it had a strange symbol

“That’s the brand?”, you asked, gods, if that camera was pointing at your bed, for how long it had been recording? you suddenly felt cold, cold sweat running down your back

Gods

“Harwin”, you called, he hummed back, “I need to ask you something, tell you, more or less”

“I know, I’m sorry for not telling you, I went back to her”, he cut you

“To your co-worker?”, you asked, feeling relieved, at least you weren’t the only one with the 22 year old 

“Yes, I’m sorry”

“It’s fine Harwin, at least it was worth something, but still this doesn’t answer the cameras”

“We will figure it out”, he said firmly

“You are not the one that had been filmed for who knows how long”, you muttered

“We will figure it out”, that sounded like a promise, “I’ll call a guy, and I’ll let you know”, he said trying to hang up

“Harwin”, you called again

“Yes?”, he asked back

“I’m sorry”, you mumbled

“For what?”, he asked

“Please don’t hate me”, you asked hopefully

“I could never hate you”, he said with certainty

“Never say never”

“Look I need to go, I’ll talk to you later, please don’t be upset, relaxed”, you barely nodded, a single tear fell from your eye, when he finds out what you had been doing, he was never going to forgive you

You sat on the couch, signing loudly, not knowing what to think 

You had to freak out, didn’t you? you felt weirdly calm, like you had some sort of drug that didn’t allow you to feel anything anymore, maybe it was just the good sex. 

But then, as you saw Jace’s bag that you haven't seen before, his laptop was peeking out of it, and in it… there was a sticker.

Another tear fell down your eye, but you whipped it quickly when he showed up 

“Was what that about”, you looked up at him, trying to hide what you just found out

“Nothing, it's just hard”, you muttered, he smiled at you, only wearing his boxers, he placed his hand on your shoulder

He had been spying on you

“We have a dinner tonight”, he said simply, you raised an eyebrow to look at him

“What?”

“A dinner, in my mother’s house”, he said so easily, like you were a normal couple

“Jace”, you called, like he had finally snapped 

“What?”, he chuckled

“Do you think that is appropriate?”, you asked, “is not your birthday anymore”, he looked down at you with a smirk, and a dark look in his eyes you didn’t like, that plus… the camera

“She knows”, your heart stopped then and there

“What?”, that smile made you shiver

“Oh darling, she knows”

“How? why?”

“Well, she suspected by my birthday and then I had to tell her, when Aemond visited you trying to blackmail you to fuck him”. And then you stopped breathing

“You knew?”, you choked out

“I found out”, his demeanor, his stance, his eyes… his smirk, your bottom lip quivered, more tears fell down your eyes

“Don’t cry love, the only one left is my father, then, we can finally start our lives together”, he leaned in and kissed you on the cheek. “And don’t you worry about work, already called them and explained, they will send your things”

Alright! this is it! had to make it short, sweet, kinky and a bit dark! I know it leaves a bit open... but I want your kinky minds to fill in the gaps! muahaha what was the saying... "Is worse what you imagine?" maybe is in spanish! hehe anyways thank you for reading and hopefully I'll see you in my next kinky history.

taglist! @champomiel @urmomsgirlfriend1 @sweethoneyblossom1 @lukepattersin @ladylyanna91 @snowflake-latte @bruher @bellstwd @inesven @iamavailablesstuff @haydee5010 @happinessinthebeing @agqrtz @ajanauia @joliettes @lightdragonrayne @ivoryluvs @fairysluna @cumslutforaemond @possiblyafangirl

#misguidedblurred #jacaerys strong #jacaerys velaryon #harwin strong #hbo house of the dragon #jacaerys x y/n #jacaerys x reader #jacaerys x you #jacaerys x oc

[salty-croissants]

Reader who performs in musicals x Bullfrog, Rayman and Ramon (all separate) please? Thank you! Have a good day/evening/night!

Thank you for the request ! 

This one was really neat and fun to write :D

Hope this turned out okay !

Details : use of gender neutral reader ;

established relationships ; 

no warnings needed 

Bullfrog 💚

When you first told him that you were a musical performer , Bullfrog was absolutely amazed by it … no matter what role you actually play , for him it’s like you’re the most talented person in the whole world . 

< Oh my dear , c'est incroyable ! I can’t wait to get to see you perform one day ! >

< Aw , thanks love , but are you sure that wouldn’t be dangerous for you ? You know , with your job and many people around someone could recognize you and … I wouldn’t want you to get hurt because of me … > 

< I’m going to be careful don’t you worry , I’ll do anything I can to be there : it’s not just any musical if you’re in it mon amour ~ > 

Yeah , Bullfrog really meant what he said : 

you can often spot him hidden somewhere in the room when you’re on stage , staring at you with those loving eyes that never fail to make you blush …

He’s just so cute , and the fact that he would go to such lengths just to be there to support you makes you all giddy inside … as well as a bit worried for his safety , but you try your best not to think about it too much .

When the performance is done and you get to go backstage to your private room to take a moment to breathe and relax , you already know that you only need to count to three before you hear a knock on the door and find a very enthusiastic Bullfrog on the other side …

< Thank you for coming , sweetheart ! So … what did you think ? > 

< I think you did wonderfully , y/n : I couldn’t keep my eyes off of you during your song , c'était si beau ! >

< Really ? I was honestly afraid I didn’t hit some of the high notes right … god , you wouldn’t believe how anxious that made me the second the song ended , and plus - >

Bullfrog can’t help but smile as he listens to you talk , holding your hand while walking back home …

You’re just so passionate , it’s something that makes you even more beautiful in his eyes if that’s even possible . 

Your songs often get stuck in his head , so it’s not rare to hear Bullfrog humming them to himself while showering you with affection when you’re together , but sometimes also during missions :

it helps him to remain calm , reminding himself that he has you by his side and that he has to stay alive to get back to you …

Bullfrog’s life really wouldn’t be the same without you in it . 

Rayman 🧡

One of Rayman’s favorite things to do is just sit and listen to you preparing for your current musical’s role , closing his eyes and focusing on your beautiful voice …

You’re always happy to have him there , especially since if you get easily self conscious about something his help will definitely help .

< Man … this sucks , it’s been days and I still can’t get that part right … the performance is ruined , how am I going to - > 

< Hey , hey … slow down y/n , take a deep breath …

There’s plenty of time before the performance , you just gotta keep trying and most importantly not push yourself too hard . > 

< *sigh* … yeah , you’re right … thanks Ray , sorry about that . >

< You don’t need to apologize honey … here , how about we take a break ? 

You’ve been working on it for hours now , I think you’ve earned it . > 

Even tough the Directors are constantly monitoring him , you can bet that Rayman will do everything he can to be there the day of the performance , and whenever you see him cheering for you among the crowd it always fills you with joy … 

He’s just so sweet , you can’t help but love him even more in those occasions ://) 

Rayman actually has lots of recordings of you singing , that way he can listen to them whenever you’re away and he misses you … 

Oh , and you can be sure that he will gush about you to literally everyone , because they all need to know just how wonderful and talented you are . 

< Ahh , you should’ve seen it … 

The way their eyes were shining while singing on that stage was simply magical !

Isn’t my y/n just amazing ? > 

< Mhm … 

Mister Rayman , can I leave now ? It’s been one whole hour … I’m just a janitor , remember ? > 

Since he does have quite a nice singing voice himself , you and Rayman definitely love to sing duets together , sometimes even dancing in the middle of the living room while the sun sets outside the lounge …

It’s a beautiful , precious moment for the both of you , ones that you will carry in your hearts forever .

Ramon 🖤

Okay , so now that he murdered the Directors and officially became wanted by Eden , Ramon knows that it’s not safe for him to show himself in public anymore … 

However , since you still need to perform in your musicals he can’t help but feel very torn about the whole situation , especially since he’s way more protective of you after all that’s happened . 

< I’m telling you sweetie , I’m going to be just fine ! It’s only a few hours … > 

< But I have to … I need to make sure nobody hurts you . > 

< Ram , I won’t have you risking your life to watch over me . We’ve talked about this . > 

< I can’t lose you , y/n … > 

< You won’t … I promise . 

I’ll be back before you even notice . > 

Remember those recordings of your performances he made when he was still regarded as the Voice of Eden ? 

Well , Ramon definitely listens to them a lot more now to try and keep his head distracted from thinking about what dangers could take you away from him when you’re gone .

It’s not a rare occurrence for you to arrive home and find Ramon asleep with one of the recordings playing in the background , and it’s during those moments that you fully realize that you really are the only thing keeping him together .

Whenever he happens to have a nightmare ( let me tell you , it happens often … this poor man is just so scarred by what he saw and what he did ) , Ramon is really going to appreciate it if you decide to sing him to sleep :

he just holds you tight , all the tension in his body finally leaving him thanks to your voice and your gentle touch caressing his hair …

< Mmm … y/n … > 

< I’m here , darling … I’m right here … >

< I love you so much , y/n … > 

< I love you too Ramon … there , just close your eyes , you should really try to sleep some more . > 

< Mmkay … > 

Sometimes when you’re having a bit of a rough day , Ramon is going surprise you by suddenly hold your hands and start slow dancing with you , singing your favorite duet … 

It’s one of the only moments in which all of his troubles seem so , so far away , leaving just you and him in the comfort of your home , being happy in a place were no one can hurt either of you … not Eden , nor anybody else . 

#captain laserhawk #x reader #rayman x reader #bullfrog x reader #captain lazerhawk rayman #bullfrog captain laserhawk #captain laserhawk bullfrog #rayman #captain lazerhawk bullfrog #gender neutral reader

[mangoisms]

circle k (back to you)

summary: in which you're just the graveyard shift employee at circle k bombarded by vigilantes.

━ chapter two: it’s getting late | read chapter one

━ pairing: tim drake x f!reader

━ word count: 4.5k

━ warnings: none

━ masterlist

━ a/n: would be lying if i said this was for tim's birthday tmrw. it was rlly just because the reception to chapter 1 was so lovely and i also did this with my other tim fic—posting chapter 2 early, i mean. but we'll just have to work with this. happy early birthday tim you are annoying and i want to study you under a microscope <3

You expect Red Robin’s appearance to be a one-off thing. 

It is not. 

Instead, the next day, you get Black Bat. 

It jolts you from the phone call you’re having.

“—understand the temptation to tell them to screw off but I really don’t want to get… shot…”

You trail off, watching, wide-eyed as your newest vigilante customer steps into Circle K. 

Black Bat cuts an imposing figure, her suit made up mostly of inky black material, with a few accents of gold, the Bat symbol on her chest standing out the most. Her black cape flutters behind her, moving like a shadow. She looks the most like Batman, you think, with the cowl and the pointed ears. Except the eyes of the mask are black and the bottom of her face is completely covered—stitched closed. Considerably more creepy, you think, goosebumps breaking out over your skin. Though that could be the fan you have on, fluttering your hair as it makes a slow rotation.

“Hey, did you die or something?”

“No,” you mutter, watching, your heart starting to pick up as Black Bat comes up to the counter.

You aren’t sure what you expect, but it’s not—

“Do you have Red Bull?” Her voice is low and melodic. Not befitting of her… general aura.

Wordlessly, you point to the refrigerators at the back.

“Thanks,” she says, then she turns and walks away. You can only see the top of her head and the pointed ears of her cowl. A second later, you hear the suction-y sound of the refrigerator door being opened. 

A voice calls your name from the other end of the line. 

Your best friend, Stephanie Brown, who gave you a call to see how your summer break has been treating you. 

“Sorry,” you say, clearing your throat. “Just got distracted by something outside.”

“Something outside? That’s not reassuring. At all.”

“It’s fine, it’s fine. Like I was saying, I’m not gonna tell them that. It’s tempting but like I said, I don’t want to get arrested or some shit.”

“The charges wouldn’t even hold. It’s a free country. I can tell a cop to fuck off if I want to. That’s my god-given right.” 

“I appreciate the spirit, but I don’t think the GCPD would agree with you.”

“Well, the GCPD can kiss my ass.”

“You and me both, Stephie. You and me both. So, how’s, uh, Metropolis?”

“Metropolis is Metropolis. Brainiac nearly took control of the city yesterday but what’s new? Mom’s having a good time, though. Even if things are way overpriced over here. I mean, seriously. Eight bucks for a cup of coffee at this place we went to today. They’re crazy.”

Steph babbles in your ear for a few more minutes. Long enough for Black Bat to reemerge from the aisle, two cans of Red Bull and a bag of Takis and a pack of sour gummy worms in hand. You wonder who the second person is. Red Robin, maybe? 

He’d been odd about the hot chocolates. Odd in general. But that’s what you get with these vigilante types. 

No matter. You quickly focus on your current situation, giving Black Bat a small, embarrassed smile and pointing at the phone crammed between your shoulder and ear, mouthing Sorry. 

You shouldn’t be doing this on the job and you should’ve told Steph you had to go but quite frankly, you need the assurance of another person with you. Even if said person can’t do anything and is across the harbor in Metropolis on a mini-vacation with her mom. 

 Black Bat shouldn’t give you trouble about it. You hope. She just scares you a little more than Red Robin. Which is silly because he’s a guy and probably more potentially dangerous but. You know. Her suit is just… too similar to Batman’s, and he’s the one who scares you the most.   

Still, Black Bat just shrugs and waves a hand. “It’s fine.”

You nod your thanks, then scan everything and bag it. She pulls out a twenty dollar bill from her utility belt and you give her the change, which she promptly puts in the tip jar. A kind gesture, really, considering the twenty is a bit of an overshoot for her total, leaving you with a nice tip. 

You guess that if anything else, at least it’s nice that these vigilantes tip. 

After dropping the receipt into the bag, she takes it and waves at you. 

Mystified, you wave back. 

Then she steps out, cape fluttering behind her.

“Anyway,” Steph says on the other end as you focus on her voice again. “It’s pretty fun but I miss home. Can’t wait to be back in the city. We’re hanging out as soon as I do, by the way. How are things with you?”

Oh, you can’t keep it in. You have to tell her. 

“I saw the Flash two days ago.”

But she misunderstands.

“Oh, yeah,” she says. “I saw that in the news. ‘Cause of Trickster, right? Bet Batman wasn’t happy about that.”

“No,” you say. “I’m saying I saw him. Here. At Circle K. He dropped in to grab a bite to eat. I know you and Tim absolutely refuse to believe me when I say he visited me and that we’re friends—which, by the way, he totally reaffirmed when I saw him—but he was here.”

“We’re jealous, that’s all,” she says. “Just don’t want you running off with the Flash thinking he’s cooler than we are. Which, to be clear, he isn’t. Not me, anyway. Tim is up for debate.”

“Well, you’re about to be a little more jealous.”

“And why is that?”

“Because since he visited, weird shit has started happening.”

“Weird shit is always happening in Gotham. What is so special about this weird shit in particular?”

“Oh, he said something stupid to Red Robin—Red Robin came in a little while after he did, I guess they were working together to track down Trickster—anyway, he was talking about how I’m… scared of the Bats—”

“Are you scared of the Bats?”

You throw up a hand, though she can’t see it. “I have a healthy amount of fear and respect for them—and on that note, please don’t tell anyone else I’m telling you this.”

“Of course.”

“Right, well, Flash was just ragging him, you know? About how he has a better relationship with me, someone who doesn’t even live in Keystone or Central, than the Bats do.”

“So?”

“So,” you blow out a big breath, “Red Robin showed up yesterday to get some hot chocolate—”

“Hot chocolate?” Steph asks, disbelieving. 

“Yeah. He said it was a better alternative to coffee. Guess he’s not into energy drinks. Weirdo. The whole thing about it—weird. Like… I don’t know. He was just acting weird when he was asking if we had any.”

“… That is weird,” she says, an odd note to her voice. She clears her throat. “And then?”

“I knew why he was doing it so I told him he didn’t have to come around ‘cause he and the others obviously need to uphold a specific perception, right? Then he was all, Well, what does a civilian like you know about it? Can you believe they unironically call us that?”

Steph laughs. She laughs hard.

You wait it out, not entirely sure what or why she is laughing so hard but it’s not the first time she’s ever done that, so you can just let it go. 

“Okay,” she giggles. “Sorry. Keep going. What else happened?”

“He left. But then, y’wanna guess who just showed up right now?”

“Who? Batman?”

“God, no. It was Black Bat. She was nice enough. Gave me a big tip. Creepy suit, though.”

“What’d she’d get?”

“Two Red Bulls, a bag of Takis and a pack of sour gummy worms. Wonder who that second Red Bull is for. And the snacks. Red Robin realizing hot chocolate in June is weird? Hard to imagine him eating Takis, though. He’s probably like Tim, saying they’re ‘too hot’.”

Steph laughs again for a while.

“Oh, god, you’re killing me,” she gasps out when she calms.

You shake your head, rubbing your finger over a scratch mark in the counter. “I don’t know what is so funny but sure.”

“So, then, what? You think you’re just gonna some more vigilantes? ‘Cause it’s only been two so far.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know,” you grumble. “But it’s two. When previously, this has never happened.” 

“True! Well… any preferences? For who comes next?”

“Anyone but Batman, thanks.”

Your next visitor is not Batman.

It is, in a turn of events that makes a little more sense, the Signal.

A few days after your call with Steph, things are fine, until your manager posts to the team group chat about wanting someone for an afternoon shift, saying someone quit unexpectedly. Not one to say no to some extra cash, you latch onto the opportunity—even if it’s an admittedly questionable idea. You try not to work weekends to let yourself recuperate from sustaining your not-so-great sleep schedule. 

Anyway, you feel and look like a zombie, but you get your work done. 

“I can help the next person in line,” you call. 

A tall, broad-shouldered stocky older man with long blonde hair and blue eyes behind coke-bottle glasses steps up, armed with two large cups of coffee. The scrubs he wears clues you into some kind of healthcare position. 

“Hi, did you find everything—”

The door opens, your eyes automatically flickering to the movement, and your voice cuts out sharply as you realize who it is.

The Signal stands there a bit awkwardly for a moment as all of you look—the blonde man at the counter and the other man waiting in line.

“Hey, you!”

You flinch, tensing, already fearing a confrontation as the other man steps forward, pointing at the Signal. The one in question tenses, shoulders rising, like he’s preparing to fight. You hope not. That would be a lot of paperwork for you. It’s the manager’s, technically, to report any damage done by vigilantes, but they always give it to you or the other employees on the floor.

But it is not as you feared. Instead of picking a fight, the man… thanks him?

“You’re the Signal, right? Right? You saved my son a few months ago from some muggers following him home from school. Thank you, man. Seriously, I can’t thank you enough. He wouldn’t be here with me if it weren’t for you,” the man says, holding out a hand.

“Hey, man,” Signal says, reaching out to shake his hand. “It was nothing. I’m glad I was there to help.”

“Are you here to buy something? Let me cover you. Please. It’s the least I can do—”

“Oh, you really don’t need to—”

“That went better than expected.”

The soft-spoken voice brings you out of your thoughts and you belatedly realize you still have a customer to take care of. But when you look at him, he is watching the Signal try to tell the other man that he doesn’t have to pay for him, a small smile tugging at his lips.

“Yeah,” you say. “Good thing. Signal’s a good guy.”

He turns back to you as you scan the cups of coffee, pulling out a wallet.

“He is,” he agrees easily—meaning his words, too, a genuine conviction you don’t hear often associated with the vigilantes of the city. 

Signal manages to hold firm on not needing the man to pay, repeating that he was just doing his job, and thankfully, the man accepts it with good graces. 

You quickly get your current customer wrapped up while the Signal steps into the chip aisle. 

You pass him the receipt. “Thank you, have a good day.”

He sends you a small, handsome smile, picking up the cups of coffee. “Thank you, you, too.”

The one after him steps up to pay, talking jovially with you, spirits still apparently lifted at seeing Signal and being able to thank him. It’s a nice moment, you think, and you make sure to respond in kind. 

The door swings shut behind him just as Signal re-emerges from the chip aisle, holding a can of Monster Energy and a bag of chile picante Cornnuts. The combination is… surely something. You let yourself slip with it, too, because you’ve personally heard a lot of good things about him. The fact that he works during the day helps his case, too. 

“I need the energy,” Signal says, seeing that thought in your face; he doesn’t sound mad, though, just vaguely amused. His suit is filled with more yellow tones, still intimidating but not as much in the daylight, a helmet of sorts leaving only his mouth exposed. 

“It’ll definitely give you… something,” you say, chuckling as you scan both.

He pats his stomach. “I have guts of steel. Don’t worry about it.”

“Not a problem as long as I never have to hear ‘guts of steel’ ever again. Jesus. Is that just a natural thing of your biology or is it evolutionary-based?”

“This life isn’t for the faint of heart or stomach,” he agrees, passing you a five dollar bill. “Adaptation is key.”

“I bet.”

Signal laughs, taking his change and dropping it into the tip jar. You smile, too, shaking your head slightly. 

“Have a good day.”

He tips his Red Bull at you. “You, too.”

Guts of steel. You nearly can’t believe it.

You pick up your phone, finding your conversation with Tim. You and Steph are hanging out tomorrow, so you’ll tell her about it, then. She asked him, though, and he said he was busy. Too bad. But that doesn’t mean he gets out of being subjected to those words, either.

no joke signal came in to buy a monster energy and cornnuts (a questionable combo) and when he saw me judging he said he has guts of steel

meta related do you think???

makes sense to me. you have a gene inside you that gives you literal powers i think they shouldn’t be having digestive issues/ibs like us common folk do

Your three texts, sent in quick succession, deliver. You bite the inside of your cheek as you see your previous ones still unanswered. It’s been like that for the past few weeks. Not him ignoring you but a bit of a dry spell going on in your messages that was only broken when you told Steph what happened and decided you had to tell him, too.

It’s not his fault. The dry spell from before or the lack of responses going on now. 

You started the first thing. So, it’s more your fault than anything for all of that. Steph’s talked to him, though, and she’s never let up on anything amiss…

You groan quietly, dropping your phone on the counter and burying your face in your hands.

Too complicated. Too much. 

It never used to be like that but… things changed recently. 

You, mostly. 

You met Stephanie Brown your second semester at Gotham University. 

Taking your required elective, you chose Intro to Psych. She was doing the same. Though, being a social work major, psychology was practically a cousin to it. 

The professor for the class turned out to be a total dud. Rambled during lecture, refused to give out study guides, and while he would give out hints as to what material might show up on exams, his questions were trick ones. When people complained, he said some crap about being in a higher ed setting and needing to do better because of it. Like his class was some 300 or 400 level course and not a literal intro course to a large and burgeoning field of study. 

But classes are expensive, so, you couldn’t drop it. Refused to, really, knowing you would face much more difficult classes later on, ones you knew you might need to drop and try again. So, you weren’t going to waste the money on this type of class.

Steph was of the same thought.

She sat next to you in the lecture hall. You two didn’t talk until after the first exam and everyone was upset about their grades, the exams having been handed back at the end of class. Your shared frustration brought you together, mostly as you two were ranting about it, you packed up and wound up leaving class together, the both of you just too caught up in your anger to realize you both needed to go in opposite directions for your next class. 

You initially agreed to be study partners, to cover more ground that way. But Steph managed to worm her way to your heart by the end of that semester. 

Your astounding lack of friends helped, too. Even if things had been that way since your junior year of high school, even if you wanted things to remain that way to protect what little remained of your heart, the loneliness hit you harder than you thought it would when you started college. 

And Steph was nice and funny and listened to you and paid attention to you and you… were so very deprived of those things, so it was nice in the beginning, but then you realized, to your own horror, that you actually wanted her to stick her around, that just as she knew nearly everything about you by the end of the semester, you knew nearly everything about her, too, and you wanted to know more, wanted to be there for her like she always was for you. 

You have that and more now and you are so very lucky because of it.

Tim, though?

Tim was something else.

Steph told you she had a friend visiting.

Just that—that she had a friend visiting campus and she ‘hoped he could find his way to the computer workstation on the fourth floor because as soon as I sit down, I’m not leaving for anything other than to use the bathroom or some kind of world-ending event.’ 

It was a particularly grueling paper she had to churn out—twenty pages, heavily research-based with the kind of statistics that made your head spin.

Working at the front desk of the Martha Kane Library at the time, you humored her. Told her good luck and that you’d keep an eye out. The second part was a joke, of course, because she never said who was visiting her and how could you know if she never said anything?

You and Tim Drake wound up finding each other, anyway. 

Well, more like he found you. 

It sounds sort of romantic, right?

It’s… well, it’s certainly something.

“I’m just saying,” you’re telling him, totally neglecting your homework and the other duties you have at the front desk (you know this last part is especially true by the way your coworker, also at the front desk, is side-eyeing you but come on, there’s no one in line, so it’s fine!). “It’s a solid movie.”

Tim Drake gives you a comically disbelieving look. “A solid movie? It’s—it’s gaseous.”

“Did… you just make a physics joke? About the three states of matter?”

Tim turns an attractive shade of pink. “It’s four, actually, and, uh… yeah.”

You raise an eyebrow. “Steph is right. You really are a geek. Anyway. Cloverfield still sucks.” 

“Your opinion is automatically negated by the fact that you think the Final Destination movies have any kind of substance to them.”

“Hey, I didn’t say that. I just think they’re good ‘cause of Mary Elizabeth Winstead. You probably think the Transformers movies are actually good, don’t you?”

He looks offended. “Don’t insult me. We hate Michael Bay in this house.”

“Sure.”

“But I do think Bumblebee—”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, Bumblebee is good for a change, we all know it. You’re probably one of those Nolan stans, aren’t you?”

“I don’t think any of what you just said are real words.”

“Oh, they’re real alright. Nolan stans are constantly on his dick, they’re all like, ‘Nolan is so deep and thoughtful and there is no one else like him.’ Wrong. I could find ten of him in the movie industry.” 

Tim narrows his eyes accusingly at you. “Steph said Interstellar is your favorite movie.”

“It’s his only good movie.”

“Don’t count out Inception like that.”

“Never seen it.”

“Wow.”

“You know what you sounded like just now? A Nolan stan.”

Tim actually grins at you and your stomach flutters at the sight of it. It’s that that had drawn your eyes to him. The cute but confused looking guy loitering around nearby, systematically checking his phone and glancing around—presumably for a map of the confusing and ancient library. With dark hair, pale skin, and pretty blue eyes that make you feel unbearably seen, Tim Drake is a sight for sore eyes. Your eyes, to be certain. 

Of course, you also know he’s here for Steph. That he is the friend she spoke of. And also the ex-boyfriend. That reminder sobers you considerably. 

Kind of funny, really. 

Much can be said about Tim Drake. 

The adoptive son of Bruce Wayne. The kid who snuck into No Man’s Land on a dare and had to be extracted by the US military after his father made a fuss about it. Then later, became controlling shareholder at Wayne Enterprises for whatever reason, boosting him into a very powerful position. Then he got engaged. Then he was shot—he was meant to be killed but obviously, it hadn’t gone that way. All this at seventeen. 

But eventually it petered out. He stepped down. Engagement broke off. He recovered. Now? He does some work for WE. That’s all that’s known to the press, anyway. 

It’s like you said. Much can be said about Tim Drake. 

But most of your impression is from Steph. He plays Warlocks and Warriors sometimes. Is a bit of a computer geek and has built his own PC for gaming. Hits the skatepark every now and then. Likes to spend time tinkering on his car.  And… has strong opinions on movies. 

Above it all?

He is her ex. A good friend now! But still. That fact remains. 

“Anyway,” you say, adjusting your notebook, textbook, and bag of pens just to do something. “You’re here for Steph, right?”

“She told you?”

“Well, she’s obviously told you stuff about me.”

“Steph won’t shut up about you,” he says, seeming more amused than annoyed by that fact. “I can’t imagine it’s the same with me.”

“I know enough.” Like the fact that he is her literal ex-boyfriend. Even if Steph says their relationship wasn’t the greatest, had some very questionable decisions on both their parts, and ended a bit dramatically… he’s still the first person she ever fell in love with. She told you that much. “She’s upstairs on the fourth floor. Hit the elevators over there, then when you get to the fourth floor, turn left, then another left, and the computer workstations are on your right. Can’t miss them.”

“You should watch Inception,” he says, instead of acknowledging literally anything you just said.

You arch an eyebrow challengingly. “You should watch Interstellar.”

He taps a finger on the counter. “We should do both. You, me, and Steph one of these days.”

“I hate to say it, but that sounds like a good idea.”

Steph’s voice scares the shit out of you. You bang your knee on the desk, cursing.

Tim looks unruffled as she comes from the side—the direction of the elevators, joining him at the counter and nudging his shoulder as she goes. He nudges back. They keep the contact.

“Sorry, Stephie,” you say. “We got preoccupied.”

“Arguing,” she corrects, but she doesn’t look upset about it. Instead, her cobalt blue eyes twinkle with something you can’t quite identify as she drops her chin into her palm.

“We weren’t arguing,” Tim says next. “We were lightly debating.”

“Of course. My cute little movie geeks. I think Duckboy’s right, though—” Tim groans slightly and mutters her name in annoyance; she ignores it “—we should get together and see them.”

You scratch your cheek. “I don’t know. Finals—”

“—are not for another month. I say let’s do it.” She looks at Tim and jabs a thumb at you. “She needs more friends.”

“Stephanie, please.”

“Oh, don’t worry. Timothy needs more friends, too. Friends from, say, the other half.” She smiles mischievously, a joke known only by the two of them. 

Tim, for his part, rolls his eyes but says nothing in protest. 

You don’t need more friends. More friends is actually a very bad idea. Letting one person get close was bad enough. Another person? Hell, no…

But the look on Steph’s face tells you that you, quite frankly, have no say in the matter. And the way you and Tim ‘lightly debated’ movies for a solid half hour tells you, too, that it’ll be too easy for you and he to become friends. 

You decide to shelve the issue for now as Steph tugs him away, promising you that she’ll arrange for things.

Maybe it won’t pan out. Maybe he’s actually horribly arrogant and conceited. (Though, if he’s friends with Steph, the likelihood of that is admittedly low.) 

You don’t know. All you know is it’s dangerous to let yourself get close to someone else.

But that’s all rather dramatic, isn’t it?

And it didn’t turn out how you wanted—you met Tim in the first semester of your sophomore year; your junior year just ended this May. You’ve been friends with him for a year and half. Steph for two. No end appears to be in sight. But you’ve compartmentalized. It’s just two people. That’s fine.

It’s totally fine. 

Even if it’s two people to match the two others you lost when you were fifteen. Like a repayment for the pain.

(Or a way to double it.)

But you lost your parents in the earthquake. 

Scientists called that a once-in-a-lifetime event.

There are plenty of things going on in this city that could cost your friends their lives but… it’ll never be as devastating as the earthquake. 

The earthquake where you nearly died after a piece of metal pierced your thigh, barely missing your femoral artery, and you spent the entire time from after the earthquake, when they dug your body out of the rubble, and to when they decided to exile the city, in a coma from the infection. 

By the time you stabilized, you were on a helicopter to Blüdhaven, the rest of the city in a panic to leave, and your parents were officially gone by that point. 

They couldn’t even find their bodies in time.

It took almost three years before they did. The year in which the government turned a blind eye to the city and cast it away, then another two years to rebuild, to sift through the ruin and destruction, to find the bones of the ones left behind since they were decomposed by then, and identifying them was an even more arduous task.  

You only managed to receive the catharsis of burying them when you turned eighteen. 

You might tempt fate by saying this but even if you lost either of them, the fallout would never beat that. A blessing, in that way. 

But even you hate to consider the possibilities of them leaving you. For anything.

They won’t. 

Everything will be fine. 

It has to be. 

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taglist: @peachesona @knoxx-seresinbradshaw @kikis-writing-service @sweetistic @soundsfunbutno @ginevraxrogers

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#tim drake x reader #red robin x reader #dc comics imagine #tim drake imagine #red robin imagine #tim drake x you #tim drake x y/n #red robin x you #red robin x y/n #batfamily x reader #batfam x reader #batfam x you #batfam x y/n