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#and more fully understanding and accepting others might not understand or like what youre doing but doing it anyway
grandline-fics · 1 day
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The Little Things
DESCRIPTION: The little things they love with you 
WARNINGS: just fluff
CHARACTERS: Law, Kid, Killer
WORDS: 734
A/N: Something small and slightly different that came to mind. Hope you all like it and have a good day. Thank you as always for reading
*REQUESTS ARE OPEN*
MASTERLIST | PROMPT LIST
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LAW
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It might seem a little vain but Law loves how drawn you are to his tattoos. He loves how when he walks hand in hand with you, your thumb will always rub lightly against the inked pattern of his skin. You’re almost unconscious of it and he’s always silently expecting it and without fail you do it while looking around the new sights of the island the crew are exploring. It doesn’t stop at that though. When you’re sitting or lounging beside him in your more relaxed moments on the sub, depending on your position you have to have your hand on his arm or his chest with your fingers following the lines without even needing to be looking at them. Law finds it amusing how through muscle memory alone your hands just know the pathway of the ink perfectly. 
Law loves how you accept his obsession with needing to work longer hours to a point. After becoming a couple you both reached an understanding that on the nights he’s drawn into his journals he has to read aloud in bed and even if you don’t fully understand the medical and other scientific terminologies, the sound of his voice will always lull you over to sleep. Finally when Law feels his eyes begin to grow heavy, he pulls you close and loves to lay his head close to your chest, his most treasured sound of your steady and strong heartbeat comforts him and is the final thing he needs to fall into a peaceful and restful sleep. 
KID
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Kid’s a simple man, one of the things he loves with you is when you help with his appearance. While he remains relaxed and perched on the edge of the bed you stand between his legs, perfectly slotted and almost pressed against his chest as you carefully apply his eyeliner and lipstick with a careful and steady hand. Kid loves the simple yet intimate moment each and every morning, trusting you completely while also getting to indulge in having his hand firmly against your hip, the appearance of keeping you steady when really you both know he can’t help but have his hands on you. Kid loves the complete focus in your eyes as you do this task, taking it seriously. He only closes his eyes when you’ve finished by pressing a gentle kiss against the scar.
More than anything Kid loves how at ease and adaptable you are in his larger than life presence. Despite him being the taller and louder in the pair you compliment him so well that it’s effortless. He doesn’t need to quiet who he is, you just accept him and match his energy in your own way. Whether he’s brawling in a bar or working on something in his workshop, you’re there as his constant support. He loves how easily you slotted into his life and made him realise just how much he needed someone like you to stabilise his chaotic nature without taming it. 
KILLER
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With Killer he loves the ability to communicate with you without needing to say much if anything at all. You’re both so comfortable and in sync with one another that you know what the other needs. One such thing being you always know when Killer needs the space to breathe and relieve the building pressure against his head. He wears his mask for a reason but constantly wearing it does cause a tightness and pain. You always know when Killer is reaching his limit and find a way to sneak him away, letting him pull off his mask and lay his head down in your lap and immediately feel your fingers sink into his hair and massage the tension away from his skull. 
Killer loves having you with him in the kitchen. The two of you cook together in perfect harmony while also working together on making new recipes. Anything that Killer comes up with you’re always the first to taste test, giving him the only opinion he values while knowing that you will be completely honest and will offer helpful criticism or suggestions that will always help him improve his cooking. Killer also loves how you’re also as protective of the space as he is, always quick to kick out any of the crew when they try to sneak food before it’s ready, especially when it’s Kid that needs to be reprimanded. 
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andoutofharm · 1 year
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2013 interview // 2023 interview (patrick)
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etheries1015 · 10 months
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How TWST characters react to finding out your real name
They hadn't realized you were using a fake name or a nickname, and when they find out you hadn't told them your real name, they each reacted in their own way.
Featuring : Idia, Lilia, Crowley, Ace/deuce/grim (together) , Azul/jade/Floyd (together), Malleus, Epel, Rook, Vil, Kalim, Jamil
Idia - Fair. Its like using a fake in game name only in real life, who needs to know your real name? It's not that important, it doesn't change that you're still you. But he is glad that you trusted him with your real name, but now he's a little possessive, and doesn't like it when other people use your real name. Its HIS privilege to know the you behind the character! (He wants his y/n moment and he gets some sort of fulfillment knowing he was the first to learn your true name. Like he's in some sort of otome game)
Lilia- he raises an eyebrow and has an amused smile on his face. He wasn't expecting you to feel the need to hide your identity, were you some sort of refugee? Hiding from something? You then explain to him you simply didnt feel comfortable sharing your real name with a bunch of strangers since coming to twisted wonderland, and he was easily able to accept that answer. He calls you by whatever name you prefer, it makes no difference to him, and he quickly gets over it. (If he wants to get your attention and tease you, he will use your real name)
Malleus- A little bit...hurt, in a way? You couldn't trust him with your real name? He knew others thought he was scary and didnt trust him for his lineage, however he had to remind himself that you were different than them. You were kind and understanding, and he had to push back his childish thinking. He did the same thing in fact, hiding his name from you until learning far after your meeting. Perhaps you had your reasons as well, and he respects that, and warms his heart slightly coming to terms that you had entrusted him with that information. He uses whatever name you feel the most at ease of hearing, but there will be times in which you two are alone and he gets in his feelings. Hearing your name sound so sincere and loving coming from his lips makes it sound sweeter than you remember.
Azul + the Leech brothers- Shocked. Flabbergasted. You did it in such a cool way too, you signed his contract using a name he wasn't familiar with. "You are aware that using a fake name won't do you any good, Right?" He had pointed out. You gave him a smirk and crossed your arms, "Who says its fake? In fact, the name I signed is indeed my REAL name. I thought I might as well use my real name, to show how confident I am that your little tricks will not fool me." Jade simply smiled and nodded in approval, whilst Floyd began laughing hysterically at Azuls reaction (his mouth hung open. He just convinced himself you had an inflated ego.) Needless to say, they will not forget that moment in a while.
Crowley- Blames you and says "Well of course I couldn't find your records anywhere or continue with my investigation on your case, you didnt even give me an accurate name to go by!" (In reality he wasn't doing anything to help you, he just thought this gave him an out and more time to think of something. You knew this.) The gaslighting king, and good at making you feel bad for not enrolling into the school by providing your full real name. You rolled your eyes and kept doing what you were doing (slay)
Kalim- he gets super excited, and fully respects you by any name you go by. He showers you in compliments and says its such a nice and fitting name for a person such as yourself. He smiles brightly and locks arms with you; "(fake name) or (real name), they both suit you well! You're still the prefect I love, regardless of what name you use!" .... But then he starts to ask you why, and it turns into an hour long conversation about names. (Probably tries to suggest names that would suit you)
Jamil- A little surprised at first, however he never made a big deal out of it and didnt care much. He shrugged and continued using the name you had given him, its what you chose to go by, is it not? So he will continue to do so. (Inwardly he understands why you hid your true identity, but also thinks its silly in a way. Why would you go so long without sharing something as small as a name? But it was a one time thought, and never dwelled on those questions.)
Vil- Also doesn't make a big deal out of it. Your name suits you well, he will ask what you prefer to go by, however. If you aren't comfortable using your real name, who is he to judge? He asks you once about why you chose to use a fake name, and he respected it. "Or I can just call you prefect, if you prefer? Your title precedes your name, and it's a form of respect. How does that sound?" You chuckle and say that you trust him enough to be on a first name base, and he responds with a slight blush. You really know how to see past his professionalism.
Rook- Add it to his list of things he knows about people and probably knows too much about people. He stores it in his mind along side with your weight, your height, your frequented places in the school, your gym scores, the height you can jump, how fast you finish your lunch, how big your hand is, your shoe size, how many hairs are on your head... "magnifique! I just love learning new things about you, it never ceases to amaze the mysteries you hold! Please, tell me more!"
Epel- A little bit disappointed you hadn't told him sooner. He gets over it quickly, but he was still a little upset to hear that he was one of the last people to find out what your real name is! Not that it truly matters, but a persons name is a persons treasure, and he wanted a part of the great reveal! (It wasn't THAT great. It came up casually, he's just a little sentimental and dramatic sometimes.) He ends up carving your name out of an apple, he says he made it cause' he was bored and no other reason, but in reality he really likes your name more than he leads on.
Ace/deuce/Grim- What do you MEAN that the past year they have been calling you by a FAKE/NICKNAME This entire time?? Do you have that little faith in them???? When you explained to them you had simply rolled with it when you first arrived to twisted wonderland and became accustomed to it, the name flowed off your tongue as natural as breathing. It had nothing to do with trust as time went on. They were all so dramatic about it though. "Our Prefect LIED to us!" They cried out, prostrating themselves on the floor and demanding you buy them food in to compensate 'the emotional damages' they claimed you inflicted upon them. You rolled your eyes and laughed playfully as the three of them whined about your "distrust" in them.
You loved them nonetheless, those morons 💜
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A link to my master list!
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emeraldbloodcrown · 25 days
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i'm thinking of an alpha 141, with price and simon being you stereotypical alphas, while johnny and kyle might be mistaken for betas - until you piss them off and then even price and simon struggle to hold them back.
they're all alphas but they're also all part of the same pack, which wasn't planned by either of them but it's not unheard of for that to happen in a task force as close knit as the 141. it's their bread and butter to go into the most dangerous situations, to protect one another, to take bullets or knifes for the others; they're the only ones who can actually understand the depth of the trauma each of them is going through.
of course they'd bond together and form a pack. but they're all also alphas. alphas with a desperate wish to mate and breed, and they can't do that with each other, they need an omega for that. but an omega who not only accepts and respects their weird pack dynamic but actively wants that? unheard of, chances so slim they were non-existent.
but so were the chances of simon crawling out of that grave or johnny recovering from that shot to the head.
and they did find one, someone who loved all four of them, someone who wanted to be their mate and give them a child. a beautiful little girl, who somehow seemed to share all of their appearances. and it was perfect.
until it wasn't. until these alphas had to gravel with the situation that their omega was gone, mating bond ripped apart, and their little girl screaming her lungs out. so used to the omega's scent, which after months of trying their best was now fully gone, that it put her in severe distress for weeks on end, leaving not only her but her fathers restless.
and then there's you, their newly moved in neighbor, they only knew their name from their landlord when they came back from their latest mission, knocking and looking just as stressed as them.
price had opened the door for you, chest puffed and ready to tear you apart for coming at his pack but you were calm..exhausted beyond belief, of course, but understanding and most of all concerned for their girl..
"all that screaming can't be healthy for her either"
you had a small container with you, a remedy from your great-grandmother, all herbal so as not to offend her nose, that needs to be rubbed into her chest before bed.
"i'll just leave it here, maybe it helps"
johnny, always the perceptive one, will forever remember how you smiled sadly at their daughter, how your fingers seemed to itch towards her before you remembered your place and just left.
they would soon find out that you were an utter blessing, kind to the bone and so unbelievably considerate. the ointment worked wonders and for the first time in over a month, they saw their daughter smile again and each other finally relax.
and from that point on, johnny was gone, absolutely enamored by you and always jumping at the chance to invite you into their circles, knowing full well the others were much more hesitant, the pain and trauma from their omega abandoning them still stiff in their bones.
but they'd see what he already saw, and it was like you wanted to prove him right when you found out about what happened to their omega, to the one among them that should be bonded the closest to their little girl but was still able to just leave.
you clenched your fingers so tight he was almost afraid you'd break something, the muscles in your neck tightened and you downright snarled, nostrils flared and lip pulled back.
"is...is that normal? her screaming like that for weeks on end? is that likely to happen with something like this?"
the air in the room tensed, charged, similar to before a storm, and it answered all of their suspicion, when they gave you the answer that yes, it was normal - and it audibly cracked around you, like thunder striking, and you had to take a deep breath, mumbling in an old language to let your environment not be influenced by your emotions, lest you hurt or scare any of them.
"you're a witch"
and damn, it should terrify him, witches and shifters don't mix well but all he can think of is that he was right, you were perfect for them, your protectiveness of their daughter only outmatched by them, and if johnny hadn't already made up his mind, hadn't already talked it through with his pack, this would definitely solidify it:
witch or not, you were theirs and mark or not, they'd never let you leave again.
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cheapshrimpysheep · 5 months
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You Will Stop the Wedding! - Jamil Viper
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SUMMARY: YOU were the one being kidnapped by Princess Eliza to marry her. How would he react and how would he save you? With the aggravation of he already having a crush on you.
CHARACTERS: Jamil Viper x Reader
TAGS: Fluff; GN Reader; Declaration
WORD COUNT: 1.260 words
Riddle Rosehearts / Leona Kingscholar / Azul Ashengrotto / Jamil Viper / Vil Schoenheit / Idia Shroud / Malleus Draconia
Rescuing You - Deuce Spade; Jack Howl; Floyd Leech; Kalim Al-Asim
COMMENTS: What have I done? Why did I commit to writing this? And why did I write so much? Why was I so inspired? There were seven of them! Why do I do this to myself? So yeah, this took me a long time. But I hope it was worth it, for me and for you.
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CONTEXT: Someone was kidnapped to marry some ghost princess and might end up turning into a ghost too. And they just found out that someone was you.
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Jamil was not present at the Housewarden's meeting, since he isn't one. But it didn't take long for Kalim to tell him, especially because he was panicking. He starts saying loose sentences about ghosts, kidnapping, marriage and especially your name. Jamil gets very serious and asks Kalim to stop for a few seconds, calm down a little and explain things clearly. And if that doesn't work, he has a plan B: ask one of the other Housewardens. Riddle would be an excellent choice.
After fully understanding what is happening, he himself panics for a moment. But then he clears his throat and calms himself down. He asks, no, he orders Kalim to stay safe in Scarabia while he joins the others in the rescue groups. When Kalim tries to convince Jamil to let him help them, Jamil gets straight to the point and says it's dangerous, both for him and for you. Does he really want to risk ruining everything? It's your life that's at stake here! Jamil was being harsher than usual, but Kalim knew why, and promised that he would stay in Scarabia hoping that everything would go well. He would behave well for Jamil and for you.
However Jamil is too cautious to simply believe him. So most likely, without Kalim noticing, Jamil will put him to sleep or something with some spell or with his Snake Wisper. You know, just in case.
Jamil asked to be in the last group. A little like Azul, he is the type to first analyse all angles of the situation before forming a more appropriate plan.
When it's the last group's turn, whenever someone needs to stay behind to tie up the ghosts, Jamil tells one of the others to do it. He always managed to show himself as a good strategist and someone who conveys the confidence of a leader, so the others just followed this order without questioning much. His behavior showed that he seemed to have a plan in place. He ends up being the only one to arrive at the ceremony hall.
He could follow the plan, but he knew himself well in this regard. He is good at hiding his true feelings, but he is not good at showing feelings that are antagonistic to his true ones. The princess would definitely notice this as she noticed some of the others' strategies. For these reasons he had a plan B, but still wanted to try the original plan.
“Your majesty, you must stop this wedding. You are taking with you someone who doesn't want to be with you. If you don't marry someone who loves you back, both of your lives... afterlives? will be miserable. And that's why I'm here. Please accept me as your husband and I promise to do everything in my power to make your afterlife wonderful.” Everything was going well, until he proposed to her husband.
The princess said out loud the same thing that you also noticed. In these sentences his emotion almost disappeared, showing that he was lying. And she accused him of trying to deceive her.
Jamil sighed. He was now forced to follow plan B, which he never really likes to follow. Be honest.“You are correct, your majesty. I was lying. But-” Before he could continue speaking the princess ordered the guards to catch him. And he had a plan for that too.
He managed to dodge all the ghost guards and was heading towards the altar where you and the princess were. But one thing wasn't part of his plan: One of the guards turning into a giant ghost. Obviously he still tried to fight and did his best, but he still lost against the guard. As soon as the guard caught him, the princess wasted no time in slapping him, she didn't want to hear his excuses.
However, Jamil remained able to move. Everyone gasps, including the princess. When the guards ask what's going on, the princess says it can only mean one thing. The thing is that her slap is capable of petrifying anyone, except those who have already found their true love. The reaction from all NRC students is like "What the F-?!" And Jamil’s reaction was to lower his head to try to make his hair hide his face.
Then he lifted it again, with an upset and slightly obscured expression on his face. He really hated exposing himself like that, but at that moment, it was his last shot to save you. “Do you want the truth? I'm here for someone, yes, but not for you. I'm here for the person you kidnapped to force to be your partner.” She starts to say that she didn't kidnap or force anyone. “Your delusion disgusts me.” The guard shakes him, threatening him not to insult the princess.
But now the princess is interested. He was there for you? So why did he ask to marry her? “Because we had a plan.” Jamil admits, as if he's had enough and just wants to resolve everything once and for all. “Making you accept one of us as a husband to put a ring on your finger that would send you to the afterlife.” The princess is offended and feels attacked by that. And while she and the guard start to say how outrageous that is, Jamil looks at the princess again, but this time with a condescending look.
“If you're going to take someone with you, take me then. Let (Y/N) go. Let me go in their place. From a young age I learned that part of my job would be to be willing to give my life for someone. Let me give my life for someone I lo... care about, then.” He couldn't fake something like this that well.
And, out of nowhere, the princess started to feel sorry for herself and jealous of you. Having someone willing to give their life for you like that. This was the greatest proof of love anyone could give. How she wished she had someone like that for herself too. And this was the opportunity that the guard who was in love with her found to declare himself and say that he would give his life for her, after all, technically, he had already done so.  And that whole ending of the princess realizing that she loved him too happens, they get married and happily ever after.
As soon as the guard releases Jamil, he runs to you. “Are you well? Are you hurt?” You were petrified, but shortly afterwards you could move again. Jamil never left your side until the ghosts left.
After everything and while the first-years were getting ready to tidy up and clean the cafeteria, you asked Jamil to wait a bit. You leave the room so you can talk alone. He couldn't look at you, and he was trying to hide his face with his hands or his hair. He had practically already declared himself to you during all that madness. So you decide it's your turn to tell him that you feel the same way about him. He looks at you in surprise and you can see how flattered he was.
Knowing now that your feelings were mutual, he becomes kind of smug. “Does that mean you would give your life for me too? That you would serve me if necessary? *chuckle* Don't worry, I'm just messing with you. Unless you don't mind.” You say you would, at least, kiss him right there and then. He holds you by the waist. “Be my guest.”
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If you would like to read more from me, you can find it in my pinned post: INDEX
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Since we have masquarade event ~
How about boys reatcing to y/n walking in looking all gorgous in a  dress ?
+ they ask her to dance at the festival?? ♡♡
for:
Jamil, Duece, Malleus, Azul, Silver
Azul Ashengrotto: 
Azul couldn’t ignore what was right in front of him. The person he had grown into was one with a sharp eye for golden opportunities and seeing you as the most beautiful person in the room that night, he knew he couldn’t resist asking you to dance. You think it’s cute when he tried to hide his real intentions by acting extra shady; if he really had an ulterior motive he wouldn’t look so embarrassed when you called him out, taking pleasure in the way he nervously pushed his glasses back up his face before rescinding his offer. You don’t allow him to as you considered it a contract, just an invisible one, and if he tried to get out of the deal he would not like the consequences.
Deuce Spade: 
Deuce is a mess. He doesn’t know how to articulate the way he feels when he sees you in your dress, heart tight in his chest, muscles spasming as you approach and he nearly kneeled out of respect for someone who was clearly royalty. Seeing your easy smile made him remember you were still you despite the fancy upgrade you’d taken, and it sets him a little more at ease when you speak. He started to stutter again when he wanted to ask you to dance with him, mumbling something about two left feet and not making a good argument for why you should be his dance partner (but you accept anyway).
Jamil Viper: 
Jamil didn’t plan on dancing, he didn’t entirely plan on being here or dealing with this either, but life seemed to drag him around as it pleased.  Seeing you was the only highlight of his night, watching from the shadows with stars in his eyes as he wondered what it might be like to be even considered as your (dance) partner. He’s a little surprised that as much as he tried to hide in the shadows you always sought him out, as if you had a radar just for him. He holds out his hand without uttering a word and you return the comfortable silence, your smile nearly causing him to take after that age old fairy tale of that princess who ran from the ball when the clock struck midnight (except you’d be coming with him, to a place he could admire you in peace).
Malleus Draconia: 
Malleus can’t keep his eyes to himself. He normally thought you had a certain beauty about you but seeing you all dolled up in an elegant dress… It made him want to tap in to his more jealous tendencies, locking you away in a tower for only him to admire. Alas, he can’t imagine your relationship remaining positive should he try to force your hand like that but he knows one other thing he could do to assure others kept their distance. He approached you with an extended hand, taking yours in his own and pressing a kiss to the back of it before wordlessly leading you to the dance floor; you can’t deny Malleus, not after seeing the bright smile on his face as he enjoyed twirling you around in the middle of the masquerade.
Silver: 
Silver’s gaze sends a shiver down your spine, the unreadable expression on his face making you a bit anxious. It was always so hard to fully understand what was happening in his head, and you felt yourself holding your breath as he silently approached you. You’re stunned when he held out his hand and asked you to dance, head tilting to the side as he told you it seemed like you wanted to ask him. You’re embarrassed at being read like an open book but Silver’s small smile sets your heart at ease, a clear sign that he had the same wish as you or he would have never approached you.
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bunnibaby-love · 4 months
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hear me out...possessive dom neuvillette...power imbalance......
🧁 Neuvillette x F!Reader 🧁
♡ female reader + kinda non con + barely smut + corruption + manipulation + power imbalance + dumblification
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Iudex Neuvillette has been admiring you ever since you offered an umbrella to him. It was a simple gesture that even Wriothesley did but he thinks it might be what humans called love at first sight
It saddened him when he found out you move to Sumeru to pursue your education. He won't be able to admire you while you walk thru streets or watch on the opera house every once in awhile
Once he found out you are graduating, he didn't think twice to offer you the position of being his secretary. He made sure you are only coming to him by blocking any possible work that would want you or what you want
You of couse, accepted the position of being his secratary. I mean what's better position than being the secretary of Monsieur Neuvillette?! It's a high paying job too!
You wish to learn alot from this work experience but you don't feel doing a professional work. It's always the melusine that do paperworks while you just do Neuvillette schedule and make his meals. It makes you feel more of a maid and this is somewhere you didn't wish to pursue
"A resignation?" Neuvillette raise his eyebrows at you "Pardon me but care to explain? i don't understand you leaving such an important and high position? do you think other place would take in you easily like this?"
He always intimidate you but now it's a very scary feeling and you are sweating cold although you tried hard to be brave infront of him "Yes Monsieur i...i rather work with somewhere i can show my skills"
Neuvillette chuckles at that. He is making your life easier now then you actually want it hard? "And you think your skills are that good?" he smirk when he saw you get pale "Leaving a position like this? only well stupid people would" he cross his legs while enjoying your scared expression. "I'll gave you a better..position then"
He stands up to tuck your hair behind your blushing ears "Kneel" you quickly kneeled, scared to angered the iudex
Neuvillette is a cruel man. You perceive him as cold and intimidating man but just know how cruel he is too you.
He won't let you leave the palais mermonia anymore unless he is with you, with his arms around your waist. The people of fontaine just think of it a cute couple and how great you are for taking the heart of the iudex
When it is the opposite.
You are still his secretary by name but, you did anything but that. When the doors of his office closed, you have to sit down on his lap while he does his loads of paper work "Behave or do you want me to leave you at the floor with that tiny vibrator mhm?" you shake your head. The last time he did that to you, you were in that position for 6hours
When a trial is ongoing, you are secretly under his table and sucking his cock with whatever paced he wanted. He makes you fully naked with the thrill of getting caught
You should hate it. He is making you do all of this because of how powerful he is. He knows you have your debts still and can't even pay it if you left because he is blocking everything from you
But, is really living on surviving better than this? sure Neuvillette treats you like how the toy you are but he is also caring. He would gave you aftercare no matter how much he torment you.
"So pretty like this...at your perfect place" you don't want to think about it anymore.
You now enjoy being on the iudex knees and sucking his cock like it's the only meal you need "Good girl" You happily shows off your tongue full of his cum and swallows it
"Im very proud of you dear...especially now that the test says you are pregnant..." he kiss your lips passionately "my wife....mine forever..."
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Imagine Neuvillette having a cheeky lover, who just enjoys his reactions and lives for making him loose his cool.
He was just so damn cool and powerful, a power to beckon with. Neuvillette was a strong pillar of Fontaine, a protector many looked up to. Even with his stone cold face that didn't give anything away at first glance and caused many men and women's heart to throb, you knew for the better.
Neuvillette was indeed a cutie whenever he got embrassed from your ministrations and hid his red face from all world, mainly you, whenever he had a chance.
This time wasn't any exception as Neuvillette was huddled inside his office, doing paperwork. One might think that this was what he liked doing most of the times by how almost a pleasant face he wore and frequent it was becoming.
But he couldn't have been more bored than he was right at this moment.
As he wrote down his notes and signed the documents, he couldn't help but think back to how lovely and absolutely breathtaking you looked at the morning.
As the true being he was, The Hydro Dragon... who opened up his heart and soul for you to embrace, who was accepted as who he is without a question.
The sunlight was slowly hitting your body and face just in the right way while you laid on his bed peacefully, chest rising up and down with one arm tucked under the soft pillow and the other curled next to your chest. A soft and small smile was on your lips, lightening up his dimmed soul as you laid facing him, making him be able to trace the soft contours of your face with his clawed hand, hair blanketing his scaled torso and your arms...
And how easy it was for you to accept him, as if it was second nature.
Thanks to how he and his kind was perceived, cold and harsh with no care for humans, he had deprieved of himself the beauty of touch. He refused to have that when he didn't deserve love, in his opinion.
How could someone even love a creature like him? Powerless, thought to be dead and even weak but still a danger nonetheless... Who could stay for him in his toughest times when even he didn't understand what he was feeling or thinking?
Therefore, he devoted himself to a long and eternal life of solidarity. He was fully convinced that this was all he could get, and even he was shocked at how the human mind can easily overpower their own self.
Another magnificient mystery of the universe, he would often say and think to himself at the dead of the night while staring into his own reflection and long tail.
Well, these were all before you came and broke everything he thought was right.
Quite literally actually.
"Monsieur Neuvillette, I'm so sorry! I wasn't actually looking where I was going-" you hurriedly tried to gather all the paper that fell on the marble floor from the hands of none other than Neuvillette, the Chief Justice. You absolutely hated, even loathed being in a hurry. It always made you loose track of what you did or said, which resulted in chaos and a life time of embarrassment.
Such as right now.
"It's quite alright, dear Y/N... Are you okay?'" As the gentleman he is, Neuvillette only gave you a worried look, also bending down to help you and prevent you from piercing your knees from the glass shards on the ground as a result of you two's collision. You didn't even realise the glasses you were holding was indeed broken, too occupied with making sure he was okay and not to loose your mind by how much more handsome he looked up close-
"Am-Am I okay? Monsieur, I dropped almost all the cups on you- Oh my! Are you hurt anywhere? Are you bleeding? Come, we need to immediately look for any injury, one of the shards could have pierced you!"
Just as he was about to tell you that it was fine, you didn't have to worry so much, enough to come close to crying and he wasn't hurt at all, a shard pierced his finger through his gloves, making him hiss and almost jump away from you...
Whiiich resulted in a horrified reaction from you.
"Oh the Archons... I'm gonna die. Please hurry, let me treat them!" You mumbled in a daze, quickly pulling yourself together as you took a hold of his hand and made him sit down on one of the chairs outside his office, as if he would faint from a simple scratch. All the while, Neuvillette was in a deep shock at how things turned out as he sat there with his palm facing up, staring at you as only a wisp of your form was visible to eye by how fast you were moving.
He didn't understand why you, even if he had a "crush" on you for the longest time as Furina and Navia often told him, would dote on him and openly show worry. He was a strong individual, apart from being the literal Hydro Sovereign who had all of his powers back, and he definetly didn't need to be coddled like a little kid even if you two were getting closer and closer each day-
"This might sting a bit, but I'll try to be gentle..." You frowned sadly as if the thought alone was enough to make you cry, already feeling bad enough for possibly ruining his busy day with your clumsiness.
And his expressionless face as he stared up at you did nothing to help your nerves.
Neuvillette could feel his gaze on you had become softer, much more gentle as he gazed at your careful hands more. The feeling was foreign to him but not unwelcomed, the pleasant and soft warmth in his heart pulled a small smile out of him which was a rarity by itself. Many would argue that he never smiled or showed any emotions, a man unmoveable and cold as the highest peak of Liyue itself...
Well, you begged to differ right at this moment.
"Why do you care about me so much?" He didn't really mean to sound so rude and harsh with his question, but it was the affect of being by himself all these time, with having only himself to care and patch his wounds.
Even as small as a scratch like the one on his finger.
But it seemed his tone didn't really scare you, as a confused look settled upon your face, brows scrunched together and head tilted to the left.
A frequent thing you did which he finds to be very adorable.
"Why wouldn't I? You deserve to be cared for..." You knew there was a deeper meaning behind his question, his eyes filling with silent tears as a confused gaze settled. Hands fiddling together as he lowered his eyes and gnawed on his soft but slightly chapped lips, probably as a result of his habit of biting on it. He was being slightly vulnerable more than usual, something he had just started to do with you after months of pestering him and convincing him that you meant no threat.
But still, it was cute.... He was cute.
And it brought a different kind of bravery to you, a power that pulled you towards him by his hands, shocking both him and yourself as you rubbed his knuckles softly. Neuvillette's eyes widened noticably, shaking in your hold as the warmth you had slowly got absorbed by his greedy heart and soul that had been all alone by itselves.
Perhaps everyone was right about his feelings of you that he tried to hide, that you were such a sweet and kind person that suited him the best and obviously loved him back.
"Life might not have been kind to you before, Mr.Neuvillette... However, I hope that we were all able to change it even a little bit and that you feel loved and happy." You softly say with a closed-eye smile, head tilted to the side and he knew... He knew you said them whole-heartedly, without any hint of malice or I'll will.
Ba-dump...
All his life, Neuvillette only knew harshness and loneliness. Never once was he ever cared for, coddled up or worried over. He had never seen someone as selfless as you are, as kind as you are and also as persistent as you with a soft and pure heart, and even more pure soul.
Often times, people avoided him at all costs and he too avoided them as long as he didn't have a job to get done with them.
But not you.
You were stubborn to see past that cold mask he had put over his face, the stoic and uncaring mask he had on so that he didn't get attached to anyone deeply and got hurt in the end. You always stuck with him throughout the day, asking him questions or just simply sitting there as he tried to noncholantly answer them with a thundering heart.
You knew the sweets he loved, how he liked his tea and even readied the water he loved before he started working and made sure the container was full.
But none of the sweet gestures would be as meaningful as the one you just did: Openly tell him that you love him and care for him.
Maybe he was being delusional, blinded by his growing feelings for you and having to keep them locked inside himself, but there was one certain thing he knew as he looked up to your precious jewels...
He wasn't. You trully loved him for him, wished to make him happy and wipe that frown away and just make him see the happiness this world could offer... And maybe, you might have muttered your confession under your breath but he couldn't have heard it... Right?
But now, as the cloudy feeling of the questions that was caused by his own insecurities were washed away, there was a much more important question as you waited anxiously in front of him for his reaction and he sweated awkwardly...
What kind of date was the best one to confess to you?
He sighed out tiredly, already planning if anyone would notice him sneaking out of his office, even with his tall posture, at how appealing the thought of being with you, even with how often you teased him with your silly comments and reactions, sounded so nice.
Oh how he wished you were here, he already felt guilty leaving the warm bed you shared because of these papers that absoultely meant nothing and all the stupid people he would have to-
"My love, are you busy? Shall I come in?"
You were trully an angel sent to just him and only him.
Neuvilette's face noticeably softened at the timid voice he heard behind his office door, following soon after a soft knock as his feet already took him to the source. He quickly gave you a kiss on your forehead as soon as he opened the door, his rich perfume filling your nose as a dopey smile stretched your face and you reciproceted with a fond kiss on his lips.
Just being two sickly in love people.
After some time with basking in each other's presence, he sighed out with a half relief and half tiredness as he nuzzled his nose deeper into your neck, his arms thightening around your smaller frame.
"You need not ask, never, love... You are always welcomed, my dear."
You let him lead you to the sofa in his office with a wide smile, where you usually laid after picking up a book and read it while Neuvillette did his job- though you often got distracted by how handsome and absolutely ethereal he looked, how peaceful he seemed after years of stress.
But today, he was different.
His back was more rigid and tense than normal, his eyes were scrunched up more frequently and he sighed almost angrily at any given time so much so that you were worried his dragonic features would come out.
And even his precious water cup alongside its container, one which would always be full to the top, was empty and he never for once tried to grab it.
Yep, it seems he is very irritated and on a knife's edge today...
So, as the amazing significant other you are, you saw the troubled and disheveled state he was in and couldn't help but want to fix it as soon as possible.
And what better way is there than being the cheerful and teasing one you were? That side pulled many reactions out of him after all, and would surely cheer hım up as well!
"Neuvi~"
He immediately lifted his head to look at you with a dumbfounded yet curious look, a smile so bright on his face at just hearing his nickname out of your lips, with the voice he adored the most. He could already feel a little bit of the exhaustion slipping out of his body, his quil on his hand was slowly put aside as his whole attention was turned to you and you only.
"Yes, my dear? What is it-" he said with a soft smile, voice barely covering his happiness but soon trailed off when you got up from your position on the couch, shutting the book you definetly didn't even read a word from and stood in front of his desk with a playful smile.
Oh... Oh! Not this time, he was exhausted and he definetly wouldn't be able to uphold his serious face-
But oh boy, he didn't expect to hear what came out next as his whole face reddened in embarrasment.
"According to the judgement of Oratrice Mecanique D'analyse Cardinale, you have been found guilty..."
You leant over the table teasingly without a care, arching your back more and tilting your head to look down at his piercing yet soft amethyst eyes that widened upon hearing your imitation of his usual commanding voice when he declared the decision of that machine, already anticipating what else you planned with this-this... This flustering and heart picking, breathtaking act of absolute love and playfulness.
"...of being cute~"
Oh how nice it was seeing that redness coating his cheeks...
Neuvillette, to be quite honest, was left slacked jawed, shocked to his core and absoultely flabbergasted with his jaw on the floor. Never in his long and eternal life, did he ever think that his line and the Oratrice itself would be used... To flirt with him.
But he loved it. He loved it so much, his heart beated hard and the air in his lungs were knocked out because it was you.
You, who had stolen his soul and heart all for yourself to never give up on it. You, who had a heart of golden and soul as soft as the Silk Flowers of Liyue.
You, who he called his partner and would continue calling that forever.
You, whom he was ready to sacrifice the world for.
But he didn't realize he had been too silent, enough to make you worry and drop the facade sooner than you anticipated as you looked at him from each side.
"Neuvi? Are you okay? I didn't say something out of li-" you worriedly asked with a hand over his arm, the shocked and frozen expression of his face making you take action, ready to cool him down because the redness that was steadily going towards a purple face couldn't just be normal.
But your lover only smiled like a fool and shook his head, taking a hold of your hand that was smoothing down his hair and rubbing his nape for comfort and laid a kiss on it, before bringing it close to his face.
"Sorry, my love... Your loving eyes had just taken all my words away."
Damn him and his charming words...
You giggled shyly, desperately trying to hide your cheeks from him to save yourself from the embarrasment. Your eyes landed on his inviting lap, all cozy and soft embrace as you slowly pushed him back to straddle him easily, loving and wanting to feel his arms around your frame as your heart was filled with unconditional love that often poured down from the confines of your heart.
All the while, his eyes never left yours as he watched you with dilated pupils, mouth open in awe as you moved around to find a much more comfortable position.
He promised to lay the universe before your feet if you wanted so, after all.
"So, my words didn't even affect you?"
You asked cutely, a hint of disappointment behind your voice as your hand played with the hair he often pushed aside and not clipped back as per your request. Even though he got flustered each time you stroked his hair and he remembered the reasoning you gave him why you wished him to do so, he wasn't going to deny you of anything.
On the other hand, your excuse of "It just gives you another kind of vibe... which makes me want to make out with you." did certain things to him... Which could be often seen on his pants-
"No..?" He hesitantly asked with a raised brow, earning a giggle from you as you pointed to his chest with equally flushed cheeks.
"Then why is your heart beating so hard?"
"It has been that way ever since I met you, my lovely spouse. It's so full of you that I can hardly call it my own."
He flushed suddenly, burying his face to your neck with a groan as he laid open mouthed kisses to divert your attention from the sudden surge of love and shyness he felt from what you said. Nuzzling his face closer to yours, he couldn't help but agree that this cheekiness you only had with him was the best part of his day and life.
Only he got to receive this, it was something only he had and no one else did.
Well, damn the smooth talker...
You could only shake your head in fake disappointment with a loving smile, bonking his head softly with yours in an affectionate move as you tutted at him and kissed the corner of his mouth with a burning face, giving all your love and energy to the tired man and showing how much you liked his words.
"You are such a silly dragon... And as much as I love you, it doesn't mean I won't tease you about this later. For now though? Let's cuddle, you can read those damn papers later."
He trully was a silly dragon deeply in love.
He chuckled under his breath at how much closer you nuzzled to him while pushing the papers away, as if you wanted to become one with his body. Nodding his head as he laid back with you on his lap, a hand rubbing up and down your back, he sighed out in bliss and left his work unfinished for the day, yet another new thing he did after he had gotten together with you.
Just as always, you were right.
And he could live with that, forever, if he had the chance.
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Text
First Time (18+)
Bayverse!Donatello x reader
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A/N: Damn, I think this is my longest one ever. Big time Donnie love!💜
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Donatello is more than a little nervous about the thought of having sex with you, not trusting his own abilities, but with some reassurance and guidance from you, he rises to the occasion.
Warnings: A more angsty build up that I had planned, unprotected sex, Donnie having his first time with you💜
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To say that Donatello was an amazing boyfriend, wasn’t enough to do him justice. He was fantastic! The sweetest and most genuine guy you had ever met. He was attentive and treated you well. Sure, he might be a mutant turtle that lived in the sewer, yet he was the best boyfriend you had ever had. Whether that spoke of your former poor taste in guys, or just the general low bar for human men you did not know. But you knew for a fact that Donatello was one of the best things that had ever happened in your life.
Donatello would say the exact same thing about you. You were not just the best thing that had ever happened to him, but a dream come true. Before meeting you, he had never actually believed that he would get to experience something so good. Just as he had accepted his fate as a lonely mutant turtle that would spend his days alone in hiding with his brothers, you came along and changed his life for good.
The friendship the two of you shared was just what you needed. You may not fully understand everything Donnie had going on inside his lab, but you listened nonetheless, finally giving a much needed ear to his thoughts and inventions. He in turn provided you with a safe space to go to, whenever your life became a little too much.
During those years of friendship you and Donnie grew close in ways none of you had experienced before. Not even his brothers could read him as well as you did, and you in turn had never thought that anyone would understand you as well as Donnie did. So therefore it was only expected that stronger feelings would blossom.
When you and Donnie started dating, it felt natural. Just like your first kiss. It just came naturally to the two of you. No grad gestures and no confusion. Both you and Donnie knew what it meant, and you were just happy to be with someone that understood you so well.
But if there was one thing that didn’t come as naturally to you and Donnie, it was sex. Actually, it didn’t come naturally to Donnie. You didn’t blame him. The poor guy had lived most of his life, convincing himself that sex would never be something he would get to experience. So when you and Donnie started dating and kissing, and the first thought of sex came up, Donnie started overthinking. You were a human that had had sexual experiences with other humans before, and he was a mutant turtle who had his hand as the closest thing to a former sexual partner.
It didn’t mean that Donatello didn’t want sex, because oh boy, did he want to! He was just nervous. Really nervous. It was almost nerve racking to believe that he could actually have sex, let alone with someone as beautiful as you. And you understood. You really did. You took the time to sit with him and talk it through, making sure he felt heard and comfortable, especially talking about a subject like that. What did he feel? What did he fear? What was he excited about?
Other than the general confusion and trauma that came from accepting your fate of loneliness, you learned that Donatello feared not the action of sex itself, but how he would act. More specifically, he was nervous and overthinking, because he did not know what to do. Where should he put his hands? What was he supposed to say? And the thought that haunted him the most; if he didn’t do good, would you leave him? All very valid fears for a mutant turtle, who did not even dare to dream of being with a human.
You took Donnie’s hands in yours and told him it was okay. He was allowed to be nervous and overthink, and he was allowed to not know what to do. You told him that you loved him, and you wouldn’t leave him if he didn’t make you feel good the first time, nor the time after that. Humans too would be nervous before their first time, and it was very normal not to be satisfied the first time.
And after that conversation, you and Donnie slowly started preparing for your first time together. With Donnie being a totally different species than you, he started preparing you for what you could expect. He told you where his cloaca was located and how it worked, along with other parts of the turtle anatomy you may or may not have known already. You in turn did the same. You told him where humans liked to be touched and answered his questions about human anatomy. And it calmed Donnie down. It calmed him down enough, to the point he dared to ask if he could touch your breast.
The make out session that came from that, was one unlike any you ever had had with Donatello. With his hands groping your breast, you were at a shock of naturally good your sweet tech boyfriend was at this. You had expected him to be more unsure, but you soon learned that when he had the confidence he could do anything. Making you moan against his lips while he played with your nipples, this guy did not know what talent he possessed.
This unlocked a new area of your relationship, that you and Donatello carefully explored. Make out sessions became more common, with hands exploring and building up the courage, going a little further each time, until one night Donnie told you he wanted to try.
“Are you sure?”, you asked. You were sitting in his room, you in his lap with your arms around his neck, still breathing heavily after the heated kiss the two of you had just shared. One of his hands was in the back of your neck, playing with your hair, while the other rested on your ass, squishing you through your pants.
“I’m sure”, Donnie answered, watching you through hooded eyes. The hand on the back of your neck crept to the side of your face, letting Donnie’s thumb glide across the corner of your mouth. “I really want to try”.
You nodded your head, biting your lip with a smile, before letting Donnie close the space between you once more. Your lips dancing together as your tongues slowly found each other, letting a small moan escape you, as you felt the vibrating churr being in Donnie’s chest. You had heard that sound quite a few times now, and each time you loved it more and more.
Your hands moved from Donnie’s neck, and down to the top of his plastron, enjoying the feeling of his vibrating chest through your fingers. You moved your lips to his chin, making your to his neck, feeling the hand on your ass pull you closer. Donnie’s breathing was heavy, his chest moving as he felt you work your lips around his neck.
Donnie’s hands found your waist, dipping under your shirt to feel the warmth of your smooth skin against his rough palms. You took this as a sign, removing your lips from Donnie’s neck to take off your shirt. This made Donnie move his hands to your breast, palming them through your bra as you reached back to unhook it. The breathy curse that left Donnie’s mouth once your bra was off, went straight to your core, making you clench around empty air. And Donnie could smell it. The scent of your arousal was strong, making him slightly dizzy.
Donnie nuzzled his head against your neck, pressing kisses against your skin like you had done to him, enjoying every sound that left your mouth and the feeling of your hands on his shoulders. His hands moved from your breast to your pants, where he tried to undo them, only to grow frustrated at the small buttons in his big fingers.
“Want me to take them off?”, you asked, gliding a hand up his neck.
“Please”, Donnie answered, bringing your hips close to him once more.
Donatello watched, with his head resting on your shoulder, through the valley between your breasts, as you undid your pants. Once you got them past your waits he helped you, sliding them off of your legs before throwing them somewhere in his room, leaving you in nothing but underwear on his lap.
“Shit”, he moaned, his heart raising once more as yet another wave of your arousal hit his nose, stronger than before. He hooked his thumbs into the straps of your underwear, his eyes finding yours to ask for permission. Breathless you nodded, lifting your hips to make it easy for him to pull your damp underwear down your legs.
The sight of you naked on Donnie’s lap was enough to make him moan. Your cheeks were already getting pink, and your pupils were just as blown out as his. The best way Donatello could describe the sight in front of him was; hot. So fucking hot.
He kneeled your hips, biting his lips before he asked; “Can I… Will you show me… Will you let me finger you?”
Once again, Donnie’s words went straight between your legs. The way he looked at you and the way he spoke. Needy and so ready to try. You loved every second of it.
“Of course you can”, you answered him, before bringing him in for another needy kiss. You took one of his hands in yours, guiding it down between your legs, helping one of his fingers glide through your folds, letting him feel the wetness that had built up. Donnie shivered, letting a whimper against your lips. You couldn’t help but chuckle, pulling from his lips, finding his reaction adorable.
“You feel that?”, you asked him, letting his finger glide through once more. Donnie nodded, letting out a small shuttering yes. “That’s all because of you, Donnie”. Your boyfriend cursed once more, his face showing frustration and absolute bliss.
You moved his thumb to your clit, guiding him on how to circle his finger around your small bundle of nerves.
“Like this?”, Donnie asked, watching your facial expression as he worked his fingers on you.
“Yes”, you breathed out, arching your back enjoying the feeling of his thick thumb on you. “Just like that, Donnie”.
Donatello bite his lip, watching your face closely, while remembering the things you had told him about the human body. How humans liked to be touched. How you liked to be touched. And with that thought in mind he wrapped his other arm around your waist, holding you close and still, while his index finger glided through your folds once more, before finding your entrance. He slowly pushed his finger in, sighing in delight at how tight you felt around his finger. You moaned, leaning your head back, happy that Donnie had wrapped his hand around to stabilize you.
“Fuck, Donnie”, you moaned, feeling how his finger went further in.
“Is it good?”, he asked, brows knotting together, biting his lips as he felt the familiar feeling from his cloaca, threatening to let dick drop.
“Yes, Donnie”, you moaned, your legs shaking against his. “Please, move them Donnie. Like this”. You held up your hand, showing your boyfriend how to move his fingers inside you. Donnie nodded, doing just as you showed him, moving his fingers in and out of you while his thumb rolled against your clit. You moaned, dropping your head against Donnie’s shoulder. He moved his fingers faster, feeling you move and shake against him, every moan from your mouth sounding like sweet music in his ears. He continued like this, feeling you tighten around his finger, your climax inching closer and closer until you came around his fingers with a loud moan.
When Donnie removed his fingers from your used cunt, he could not resist the urge to bring them to his mouth, sucking them off in front of you. The look in your eyes and the way you smelled told him everything he needed to know. You enjoyed it. All of it. He brought your lips back to his, your tongues finding each other. You moaned at the slight taste of you in his mouth.
Donnie pulled from the kiss, resting his forehead against yours, listening to your heavy breathing, feeling it against his face. “Can I do it?”
“Do what, Donnie?”, you asked, your hands smoothing over his shoulders and biceps.
“Can I fuck you?”
You nodded, too stunned to speak. Once again, you had not expected Donatello to be so straight forward, having thought he would be way more shy.
Donnie took your lips in for another kiss while he slowly laid you down on your back. Once your back was flat against the mattress, he started moving his clothed crotch against you, moaning against your lips as he felt himself getting closer to his drop. You whimpered against his lip, almost begging him to take his pants off. Finally he sat up and undid his pants in full view of you. He pulled his pants off along with his boxers, before climbing back on top of you, feeling your legs close around him the best they could, bringing his cloaca to meet your wet center.
“Can I drop into you?”, Donnie asked, his lips ligering against yours, his hands moving from your hips, up your sides to your shoulder, bringing you closer to him.
“Yes, Donnie”, you moaned, buckling your hips against his, causing him to moan, feeling himself tipping on the edge before finally dropping down in front of your entrance. To his surprise, you were the one to move your hand down between the two of you, taking his cock in your hand moving it to your opening before pushing it in closely.
Donatello moaned, his head falling down beside yours, your cunt hugging him tightly as he sunk further in. You kissed the side of his face, whispering sweet nothing as he sunk in as far as he could. He stayed there for a moment, letting you and himself adjust to the feeling of him inside of you. You were a tight fit for him, but he couldn’t deny it felt good.
“Donnie, please move”, you moaned, moving your hips under him. Donnie wrapped an arm under your shoulder so he could bring you even closer to you, resting his forehead against yours once more as he slowly began to move, moaning and cursing in delight over the feeling.
His thrusts started out slow and soft, until you told him it was okay to go harder and faster, to which Donnie obliged. He cursed, one of his hands grabbing on to the bedding beside your head, enjoying this knew feeling around his cock.
“Fuck”, he breathed into your ear, causing tingles to erupt in your stomach. “It feels good, (Y/N). Fucking good”.
Your hand found his face, stroking his cheek making him look you in the eye. The sigh was enough to make both of you shiver.
“Wanna go faster?”, you asked him. Donnie nodded, his lips slightly agasp. “Go as fast as you want to. Fuck me as fast as you want, Donnie”.
And that was all your boyfriend needed. Every trace of nervousness Donnie had showed you during your first conversation about sex disappeared, leaving behind what you could only describe as a feast for the eyes. Donnie was concentrated, his brows frowning, his pupils wide as his muscles flexed before he let loose against you. You gasped and moaned loud, grabbing onto Donnie’s shoulders as he thrusted faster and harder into you. He was rougher than you had thought he would be, but you found it to be a pleasant surprise.
But then Donnie did something you never saw coming for his first time. He took one of your legs, hooking it over his arm before thrust into you even deeper than before. This new angle caused you to arch your back in ecstasy, as he continuously hit the sweet spot inside of you. It didn’t take long like this, before you felt that familiar feeling in your stomach as you clung closer around Donnie.
“Donnie!”, you moaned out, your pitch higher than he ever had heard it before, making him growl in delight. “Donnie, I’m close!”
Donnie did not answer you. Instead he dipped his head down to your neck, where he started nipping at your skin, his hips working against you like a piston. He wanted you to cum around him, washing away every fear he ever had about not making you feel good. And you knew. You knew your boyfriend, and you knew what he was thinking. And as he started groaning and biting your earlobe, you couldn’t hold back anymore, almost screaming his name as you came for him once more.
Donnie moved both hands down to your hips, holding you still as he started chasing his own high, helping you ride out your own in the meantime. As he moaned louder and louder as he got close, his thrust became more and more erratic. Finally he came, pushing himself all the way into you as he shot out his white ropes, letting out a moan better than porn star you ever heard.
Once down from his high, Donnie pulled out of you, before slumping down next to you, sweaty and out of breath, his dick still out in the open.
He looked at you, his eyes tired yet full of love, making you feel warm in so many ways. “Was it good?”
“Are you crazy?”, you asked, smiling brighter than any stare Donnie had seen. “It was amazing, Donnie!”
Donnie chuckled, wrapping an arm around you to pull you close against his plastron, giving you a kiss before resting his forehead against yours once more, a smirk spreading on his pretty lips. “Does that mean you’re up for another around after a quick nap?”
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peachsayshi · 1 year
Note
Can you write about how the JJk characters are like in their yandere version.
anon, I have actually been thinking about this recently - here’s some thoughts on yandere gojo, geto, nanami and choso!
(minors & ageless blogs dni) // tags: dark content (ish?); dub con; possessive; controlling; somno; mentions use of sex toy; use of pet name kitten; smut // a/n: I don’t usually write stuff like this so please don’t read if you aren’t comfortable!
GOJO - overwhelms you; he can’t keep his hands to himself whenever you’re around. he doesn’t care that you get nervous when he plays with your hair while you talk. he often loses his concentration to brush his knuckles down your cheek or swipe his thumb along your bottom lip. he expects a kiss whenever you greet him or say goodbye -and this kiss isn’t a chaste one on the cheek but a deep, consuming one on the lips. he wants to taste you on his tongue, to draw out every little breath and claim it as his own. the first time it happened you whimpered “s’too much,” but he just smiled against your lips and replied: “actually it’s not enough.”
you don’t fully understand why he treats you like this; why he can’t accept that his physical touch is more than you can handle. you hate that his face grows menacing when you deny him of what he wants, but you always end up succumbing to his advances. “this isn’t right, w-we aren’t even-ah…lovers…” you whisper in protest, your fingers digging into his lap while his own brush over your nipples underneath your shirt. he glides his nose up your neck and leaves a soft kiss just behind your ear as he pinches the sensitive buds. “we can be, angel…” he exhales, but his dark tone sends a shiver down your spine. “…it’s all I ever wanted…”
GETO - punishes you; you never expect him to behave cruelly towards you, because the man adores you in every way possible and regards you with nothing but admiring eyes. he’s so unbelievably sweet, you often question what you have done to deserve his heart in the first place. yet, you still find yourself easily triggering his jealousy. he won’t stand having others look at you, nor will he let it slide when you put yourself in positions of being around others who fancy you. it doesn’t matter how innocent the situation is - like when you decided to meet up with an old friend or when you gave the barista a gentle smile as he handed you your coffee - suguru will easily find it as an excuse to to remind you of what his love means over others.
“this is all they see when they look at you, you know?” he growls in frustration, his firm hands pressing your knees as he keeps you spread for him. “…your needy little cunt begging to be stuffed. they don’t give a shit about you…” - you whine when he thrusts his hips, because he’s rough and it’s entirely purposeful. he takes in the marks on your throat, your chest, and your inner thighs before softening his hard gaze. he brushes his mouth over your quivering lips, leaving a tender kiss in the wake of his retribution. “but I do, sweetheart…” he coos, as he finally eases his movements and you sigh with relief when he brings his fingers to your sensitive clit. “…I love you so fucking much. can’t you see that?”
NANAMI - controls you; he uses subtle manipulation tactics to make this happen, and because he’s supremely intelligent, it’s difficult for you to catch on when he does it. he has no ill intentions - he just wants to take care of you, and that has given him reason to claim ownership over you. you thought the diamond choker he bought for you was simply a sweet gift, but he’s particular about you wearing it at all times (except when taking a shower and sleeping). when your lease was up for renting your apartment, he arranged to have you move in with him without questioning how you might feel. “it’s for the best,” he insists, “you shouldn’t have to worry.”
he thrives off your submission; you so eagerly want to please him because you’re grateful for everything that he’s given to you. you’ll easily comply, and it works out beautifully for him. he narrows his gaze when he looks at you trembling against his sheets. “kento…wanna cum…” you mumble, and his ego flares at how you’ve been reduced to such a wet mess. he slowly shifts his gaze towards the phone screen, his thumb hovering over the control of the vibrating toy inside your cunt. “I know, kitten…” he sighs before taking a sip of his drink, pretending to show some consideration as he drags his finger to increase the speed. a wicked smile highlights his exceptionally handsome face, but your eyes roll to the back of your head that you don’t even notice - “just a little longer, hmm?”
CHOSO - claims you; he’s selfish about requiring your attention, and demands it at all hours. he hides how overbearing he is with his needy behavior, but he yearns for you in a way that aches. your time should belong to each other, it’s something precious that you both share together, and he can’t comprehend how you don’t feel the same way. of course he understands that you need space, but giving it to you is harder than he expected. he’ll often show up unannounced when you’re home alone or out with your friends, and he greets you by holding you tightly while murmuring “I miss you,” against your skin.
“please cho…” you implore, your heavy eyes drifting open as your fingers pull on the strands of his hair. “m’tired tonight…” - you are met with a hot gaze as he stares at you intensely from underneath his lashes, his lips suctioned over your clit while his fingers brush up against your gummy walls. he often does this when you’re sleeping, unable to resist himself even during the peaceful hours of the night. he doesn’t respond to your pleas, but proceeds to slurp and lick your tender pearl with even more conviction. “cho…” you hiccup, moaning a long, drawn out vowel as your breath shakes, “just…just one sec…” - he lifts his lips, his hungry eyes shifting down to focus on the sound of your pussy squelching around his thick fingers. “I’ll stop after this, okay, baby? I’ll let you go to sleep once you cum…”
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madeinnaboo · 6 months
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His master pt.2 | Anakin Skywalker
aaa thank you so so much for all the nice comments and msgs! I can't even express how happy I am you guys like what I write:`)
part one.
words: 2.8k warnings: sub! anakin, praising, unprotected sex, nicknames, smut, dom! reader,
requests are open:)
!this is my secondary blog, I can't answer comments, please msg me in my inbox or private msgs:)!
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,,Master, is everything okay?" The voice of your padawn has stopped you in your tracks. You turned around to see him leaning against the marble wall.
,,Have you been waiting here the whole time?" You asked, trying not to sound annoyed. You weren't upset at him, but you were scared he might think so. 
,,I heard you arguing" He ignored your question as he took a step closer to you. With a deep panic inside of you, you took a step back and looked around to make sure no one was there. 
,,Let's talk somewhere else, please" You practically begged him, and with a quick nod, he followed you. The final destination was your room, since it was very far away from everything and everyone. The walk was quiet as you went through what happened a couple of minutes ago with the Jedi Council. On your last mission with Anakin, a mother with an injured child asked if you could provide a safe shelter for them and a couple more people on Coruscant. Your heart ached for them, and you promised you'd help them. After arriving back from the mission, you called for an emergency meeting, fully believing the council would help. Helping everyone was what the Jedi fought for, right? You couldn't believe your ears when everyone voted for not helping the people. Apparently it was too dangerous, and it would cross some sort of deal with the oppressors of the people. After a long fight with them, you had to back away due to a very carefully placed threat against you and your position in the council. With a quick lie that you understood, you left the room, knowing very well that you'd be calling someone to go get the people and hide them on some remote planet. 
,,Now it's you who's lost in their thoughts, master" Anakin broke the silence after following you into your room. You looked up at him and gave him a tired smile. The two of you haven't talked about what happened between you the other day. You tried very hard not to even think about it.
You sat down on your bed and gestured Anakin to sit next to you. With no hesitation, he sat down, studying your worried face. You then took some time to tell him about the situation, carefully explaining the mess. When you were done, Anakin looked even more upset than you, which made you relax a little bit, knowing you weren't overreacting.
,,What are we going to do?" He asked, almost ready to go fight the council himself. You grabbed his hand, gently caressing the top of it. A feeling you've been trying to hide from him for so long fully filled your whole body.
,,You..." you implied ,,...are not going to do anything Anakin"  You said with a serious voice, trying to ignore the fact that you fully accepted how deeply you cared about your padawn. Anakin looked more than confused.
,,But-" He started, and you stood up, turning to face him.
,,But nothing. I am not going to risk the council expelling you and ruining your life, Anakin. If they ever find out... you had nothing to do with it, that's an order. Understand?" You said as images of the council punishing Anakin filled your mind. You couldn't let that happen. He was quiet, looking at you.
,,Understand?" You tilted your head, sounding maybe a bit too harsh. He stood up before walking to you.
,,I understand, master" He whispered as his eyes traveled down to your lips. Both of you knowing that was a lie. He reached down to you, planning on kissing you, but you quickly stopped it by turning around. 
,,I am going to call one of my friends about this plan" You told him before hurrying out of the room. It was absurd, you were trying to protect him from getting into this mess while literally putting him into even more danger by allowing him to feel something towards you. You wanted to scream and cry, but instead you headed to your office. Where you spent over 5 hours going over the plan again and again, making sure it was perfect. There was a lot on the line. Your childhood friend, whom you haven't seen for years, was more than happy to help you save a couple of lives. He agreed to take all the people to his home planet, where he would get them a job on his farm and pay them well. It was the best you could do on such a short notice, and you found yourself thanking him repeatedly for the whole duration of the call. You gave him the coordinates where he would find their village and told him to tell them you had sent him. The last thing before the call ended was him promising to let you know as soon as they would be safe. You sat in your chair for another couple of minutes before getting up and heading back to your room. The hall was lit since it was already very dark outside. You entered your room just to see Anakin sitting on your bed. You let out a groan as you closed the door behind you.
,,What are you doing here, Anakin?"  You asked him before walking to your mirror. Your hair has been in a tight ponytail for just too long now. 
,,You didn't dismiss me, master," he said, looking at you in the mirror. You furrowed your brows as you turned around to look at him. A smirk grew across his lips.
,,I am joking, I wanted to make sure you were okay...emotionally"  He said as he walked to you. You quickly shifted your gaze back to yourself as you loosened the ponytail, letting your hair freely fall down your back. Anakin was standing just a few inches away from you.
,,I like when you have your hair like this"  He said quietly before placing a wet kiss on your neck. The room quickly became airless, and you closed your eyes. 
,,Anakin"  You said with a warning tone, without actually doing anything to stop him. His hands grabbed your hips as he continued to kiss the side of your neck from behind. You finally gave in and rested your body against his. His kisses went from your neck to your shoulder, where he gently bit you. His hands on your hips made you turn around. You looked up at him as you placed your hands on his chest. 
,,Can I kiss you?`` He asked, his cheeks completely red. He looked so adorable. His eyes were glued to your lips, and you just simply nodded. With no more hesitation, he broke the distance between you, kissing your lips. The kiss was needy and sloppy. It was clear it was his first time kissing someone, and you felt your knees wobble. His large hands cupped your face, and you deepened the kiss, sort of taking the lead again. Your hands traveled across his clothed chest, feeling his muscles. You pressed into his chest to make him walk backward while still making out with him. When his legs hit your bed, he sat down, clearly upset he had to stop kissing you. His hands needily went to your hips. You were quiet as you watched him for a moment. His face became even more red. He then watched as your hands went to the bow on your shirt that was holding it together. With a quick motion, you untied it, letting the shirt fall open before fully removing it from your upper body. Anakin's eyes widened as he was met with your breasts. While he was busy staring at your bare chest, you removed your pants. You were now almost fully naked in front of him, surprisingly not feeling shy at all. Clearly, that was an emotion only he felt—probably enough for the both of you. With a smirk, you tilted your head at him, showing him you didn't like the fact he was still fully clothed. With almost inhumane speed, he pulled his long black shirt over his head before removing his loose pants. His hands then started to grab his underwear, but you shook his head, making him stop.
,,Leave yours on"  You ordered, and with a gulp, he nodded. Then you reached for his hands, guiding them to the last piece of clothing on your body. Once they were on the soft fabric, you let go of him. His breathing was heavy as he looked up at you before looking down at your panties again. Almost painfully slowly, he pulled them down, and once they were fully down, you stepped out of them, tossing them away with your foot. The way he couldn't control where he was looking made you smile. You reached to cup his face before making out with him again. Then you got on top of him, placing both your legs on his sides and holding yourself up so you wouldn't yet fully sit on him. His upper body laid down on your bed. You had full control over the make out as his hands went once again to your hips. Before they could reach any lower, you broke the kiss, looking at him with a smirk. You finally lowered yourself onto him, teasing his hard cock over his underwear with your pussy. His eyes shot closed as his fingers dug into your skin. You bit your lower lip at the sight of him under you before slowly rocking your hips on his cock. You teased him like that for a short moment before a needy whine escaped his lips. 
,,What's wrong, pretty boy?"  You teased him as your hands danced on his chest. He opened his eyes to look at you. He looked almost in pain.
,,Master..."  He said shyly, and you tilted your head. You continued rocking your hips, waiting for him to speak. He was too shy to tell you what he wanted, and he hoped you would just do it. But where's the fun in that?
,,Tell me what you want"  You ordered before reaching to hiss his abs, which made you lift your lower body, taking away the pleasure you were causing him. With a disagreeing moan, he made you stop kissing his body. 
,,I want- I want you to make me feel good, master"  He said before he closed his eyes with embarrassment. You purred your lips at how cute he was.
,,And how would you want me to do that?"  You teased, enjoying his suffering maybe a bit too much. He whined again, but you just waited, not touching him anywhere. He fought so hard to tell you.
,,I want you to r-ride me, please" He said quickly, and a smile took over your whole face. You were so proud of him, ready to reward him for being such a good boy.
,,Since you asked so nicely"  You responded, before lowering his underwear and freeing his cock. After that, you sat on it again, wetting it with your wet folds. You weren't doing anything too crazy, and he was already a moaning mess. You were planning on playing with him like this for longer, but you felt your own neediness taking over. After that, you lifted yourself up on your knees while grabbing his cock. You lined his tip with your hole before slowly pushing yourself down again. You stopped moving when his tip was inside of you, making sure everything was okay and nothing hurt him. His fingers were still digging into your hips, but you knew that was because of the pleasure he was feeling. His thigh muscles were flexed as his eyes were closed. He was so overwhelmed with pleasure, and you weren't even fully sitting on him. After a while of you not moving, his hands pushed you lower on his cock, which made you moan unexpectedly, causing him to moan as well. You then fully sat down on him, throwing your head back. His cock was buried deep inside of you, stretching you out nicely. 
,,You feel so good" He whispered with his eyes still closed. You moaned at his comment, focusing on steadying your breathing. Your hands then found his on your hips, and you grabbed them before lifting yourself up on his cock. You shifted your body weight onto his arms before you started to actually ride him. You started slowly before adding speed. 
His eyebrows were scrunched together, and you slowed down a bit. ,,Are you okay?" You asked, worrying, but he quickly nodded his head, lifting his hips, pushing his cock back inside of you. You closed your eyes as you sped up again, fucking yourself on him. You fought hard to keep your eyes open, wanting or actually needing to see his face. Sweat was building up on his forehead, his chest was moving with his deep breaths, and his bottom lip was stuck in between his teeth. His needy whines filling your room were the nicest sound you've ever heard.
,,M-Master can I ple-please cum inside of you?" He struggled so hard due to the fact that his constant moans didn't allow him to speak. 
,,You want me to fuck the cum out of you?" You asked with a husky voice, and he let out almost an animalistic sound. His hips started to meet yours halfway, causing the both of you even more pleasure.
,,Yes, please" He begged, and tears of pleasure filled your eyes as he hit the right spot again and again. He opened his eyes as he felt you shift even more of your body weight onto his arms. Your eyes were closed, and he almost came by looking at you. He couldn't believe he was the one making you feel this good.
,,Am I doing good?" He whispered, and you didn't bother to open your eyes. You realized how hard it must have been for him to talk, since it was the same for you now. 
,,So good" You answered him, and he nodded his head more for himself than you before focusing on thrusting into you. Your hands left his, and instead you put them on his chest, which made you move more freely. You felt your high closing on you, but you pushed it away, wanting him to cum first. That didn't take too long. His muscles tensed even more, and his toes curled up as he came inside of you with loud moans. You slow down a little bit, letting him hold you as hard as he wanted. He looked almost like he was in pain. His breathing was even heavier, but his muscles started to loosen up a bit. After a while, he opened his eyes, and you looked up at him. His eyes then traveled to his cock still inside of you, realizing you haven't came yet. His hands held you in one place as his hips started fucking back into you. A wave of pleasure filling you again.
,,Tell me if it gets too much for you" You told him before another moan took over you, not wanting him to get too overstimulated. He hasn't answered you; instead, he sped up more. 
,,Anakin" You cried out as your high made its presence known again. The feeling was building up in your stomach faster and faster every second. Anakin was mesmerized by your face filled with pleasure, and he swore he would do anything to make you feel like this again. Your hands shot to his stomach to hold yourself more as the feeling you'd been chasing exploded deep inside your stomach. Anakin slowed his thrusts as he watched you enjoy your orgasm. Your whole body was filled with unspeakable warmth. Your legs shook as you started to come back to reality. By then, Anakin had stopped moving completely. With a deep breath, you opened your eyes to be met with his. You pushed yourself up on your jelly knees, so you could get down from him. He whined as he no longer felt you around him. Your body hit your soft bed as you laid next to him. He sat up, moving further away from you. You wanted to ask him where he was going, but you stopped as he grabbed your thigh and moved it away from the other one, spreading you out. He then pushed your folds apart, watching his cum slowly spill out of you. The sight made you want to fuck him again right away. He took his time watching your abused pussy before forcing himself to get back to you. He laid next to you, grabbing the blanket that was folded at the end of the bed. Then he placed it over the two of you, and you put your head on his chest. You knew you should go take a shower, but the warmth his body was giving you was just too addicting. His hand hugged you, lovingly pushing you closer to him.
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burst-of-iridescent · 17 days
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i've written before about how fire lady katara isn't an inherently disempowering or racist trope, as have many others, but lately i've been thinking about how arguments against fire lady katara often tend to utilise a surface-level interpretation of colonial trauma.
[edit: this post will use the term "colonial trauma" because those who argue against fire lady katara usually use the same wording or are referring to that concept. but it's important to note that according to show canon, the fire nation did not colonize the southern water tribe and zuko and katara did not have a colonizer/colonized relationship.]
antis who present this argument usually posit that marrying zuko would be a form of re-traumatization for katara, while marrying aang would "protect" her. katara is supposedly more shielded from confronting the impact of colonization in the southern water tribe or on air temple island than she would be with zuko in the fire nation, which contextualizes colonial trauma purely through the lens of physical interaction with the colonial power (ie. living in the fire nation or looking after the people of the fire nation). whether intended or not, this argument inadvertently limits colonial trauma to the geographical boundaries of the colonizing country and implies that it can be reduced or averted solely by minimizing contact with said country.
even leaving aside that we have seen katara in the fire nation (and enjoying herself there), the implication here is that active engagement with a colonial power as a member of colonized peoples is an inherent form of re-traumatization... which i take issue with for multiple reasons.
firstly, katara lives in a world that has been permanently shaped and changed by imperialism, and that's going to affect her no matter where she goes. sequestering herself in the south pole her whole life and never seeing a glimpse of fire nation red again won't allow katara to escape the legacy of colonization or the trauma it has caused her, because its influence is rooted in everything from her family to her tribe to her own bending. believe me, i understand the appeal of a world where women of colour can avoid reckoning with the impact of colonization by simply never setting foot in the colonizing country again, and why people might be uncomfortable with zutara individually as a result - but i can't accept it as a valid argument against the ship, because that's just not how colonial trauma works.
secondly, the idea that this "protects" katara reeks of paternalism because katara is not a character who chooses her path simply based on how safe or comfortable it is. if that was the case, she would never have left the southern water tribe at all! she could've remained there her whole life and likely been safe, since the fire nation had no real interest in the south pole any longer. katara is fundamentally defined by how relentlessly revolutionary she is - over and over, she chooses to do what is right, what is hard, what is unexpected, even at cost to herself. she challenges injustice and discrimination and bigotry; she fights for the downtrodden and speaks for those who can't speak for themselves; she will never ever turn her back on the people who need her. does that truly sound like someone who needs to be hid away and protected from her own supposed re-traumatization?
thirdly - and i fully accept that there are those who might disagree with this - katara actively choosing to engage with her colonial trauma can be empowering just as it can be traumatizing. don't get me wrong: as a woc and a minority in my own country, i understand how tiring it is to do this. i understand the exhaustion of confronting what was done to you and your people, of facing down bigotry over and over. i understand the desire to run away from it all, and why it can be wish fulfilment for others to let katara do so. i really, really do.
but there is also wish fulfilment in letting katara fight, as a brown girl with power and resources that few brown girls in the real world hold. there is a power fantasy in seeing katara head into the belly of the beast and emerging triumphant. there is empowerment to be found in seeing katara struggle with racism and ignorance and mindless hate to enact change - and succeed. i love reading and writing about katara unpacking her trauma regarding the fire nation, about growing to love the place she once hated, about reconciling both her homes and healing from the wounds of her childhood.
and ultimately, i think that's what katara would want for herself. after throwing herself head first into the fight against the fire nation, after facing down her greatest trauma instead of letting it consume her, after helping and protecting the people of the fire nation, after refusing to let the fire nation take anything else from her - i firmly believe that the last thing katara would do is allow herself to be ruled by the fire nation instead of being the one ruling it.
personally, i find that a more hopeful and victorious narrative than one where she remains safe and sheltered away from the fire nation, but forever haunted and dictated by her trauma. would that be realistic? perhaps. but the entire point of foiling katara with characters like jet and hama is to show that she's not doomed to be mired in the pain of her past. that where their stories could only end in tragedy, hers can - and does - end in hope for something better, as she always believed it could.
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waltermis · 7 months
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Imagine You Joining The Avengers And Natasha Having A Huge Crush On You
MASTERLIST ↠ NATASHA ROMANOFF MASTERLIST
Summary: Basically the title 🤪
Warnings: swearing, implied sex
↠↠↠ 
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EARLY STAGES
- When you first join the avengers, Natasha would be apprehensive around you
- You think that it's because you're the new girl
- You try to be as nice as possible to her
- Leaving her a protein shake after her workouts
- Making sure that her peanut butter sandwiches didn't have any crusts
- and that every single part of the bread was smeared with peanut butter
- Bringing her favorite snacks & drinks to her door when she had a huge workload
- You didn't know why you wanted to do those things
- but you saw how her eyes lit up whenever she found something you left for her
- and it made you feel happy
- Whenever you smiled at her, Natasha could feel her entire body heat up as she blushed bright red
- The team OBVIOUSLY took note of that and would tease her constantly
- One very terrible teasing session caused someone from the team to go the med bay
- Not gonna name who...
- *cough* Tony *cough*
- It was after a huge party that Tony threw did Natasha finally open up to you
- You had inadvertently saved her from a very drunk and extremely creepy douchebag who couldn't take no for an answer
- After you pulled her away, the two of you stayed at the bar while you threw every pick up line imaginable at her
- and each time, she would throw her head back, squeezing her eyes shut as she laughed
- "Excuse me.... But did you come from the vending machine? 'Cause you are a snack!" ~Y/N
- "Oh god! That's terrible!!" ~ Nat
- "Right?! I don't get how guys think that'll work?!" ~Y/N
- "Did you just come out of the oven? 'Cause you're hot!" ~Y/N
- *gagging noises* ~ Nat
- "You're definitely on my To-Do list tonight..." ~Y/N
- "Ew..... Do another one..." ~ Nat
- and by the end of the night, the two of you were wheezing al the laughing
- After that, the two of you became attached to the hip
- Whenever someone from the team couldn't find you, they would look for Natasha and vice versa
- One time, Steve had found both you and Nat hanging upside down from a tree while you taught her how to play 'Patty Cake'
- Another time, Wanda found the two of you reading each other's' favorite stories just so you could fully understand what the other was talking about
REALIZING
- It wasn't until much later on in your friendship –8 months– with Natasha, did she finally understand why her heart would beat faster whenever you were in the same room as her
- Or why she felt angry whenever you went out with someone that wasn't her
- Or why sometimes she would have to physically restrain herself from wanting to kiss your pout when she rejected watching a rom-com
- It finally dawned on her after she spoke with Clint
- *cough* more like Clint slapped some sense into her *cough*
- "Clint! I think I might be sick..." ~ Nat
- "What?! Why?" ~ Clint
- "I dunno... My stomach gets twisted into knots and my heart beats really fast sometimes..." ~ Nat
- "Lemme ask you, does this all happen when Y/N is around?" ~ Clint
- "Yeah why? *gasp* You don't think she's drugging me do you?!" ~ Nat
- "N-no... I don't think that our sweet little avenger would be drugging you...." ~ Clint
- "Then what is it??!!?!" ~ Nat
- "How are you such a good spy and yet so oblivious and naïve when it comes to feelings?" ~ Clint
- "Wha-?" ~ Nat
- "You have a crush on N/N, dumb dumb!!!" ~ Clint
- "What?! No I don't!!" ~ Nat
- "You said that she had the breasts of a Greek goddess!" ~ Clint
- "What!? When???"
*flashback*
- When the team first began discussing whether they should accept you into the avengers or not
- Natasha may have let something slip
- "C'mon!! She can't join us!!!" ~ Tony
- "Why not, Tony?" ~ Steve
- "Are you kidding me?! That woman has the nose of a bloodhound!" ~ Tony
- "And the breasts of a Greek goddess..." ~ Nat
- "...Nat...?" ~ Clint *end flashback*
- "Oh my god!!" ~ Nat
AVOIDANCE
- After finding out, Natasha avoids you as much as she can
- You're confused thinking you did something wrong
- Every time you would enter a room, Natasha would flee immediately
- the only thing convincing you that you didn't imagine her would whatever she had left behind when fleeing
CONFRONTATION
- It took weeks before you were able to corner Natasha
- She had been taking a shower when you quite literally barged into her bathroom
- You didn't care anymore
- You had waited long enough
- You pushed her against the wall, still fully clothed questioning her
- "Why are you avoiding me?!" ~Y/N
- "W-what the fuck are you doing in here?!?! I'm taking a shower!" ~ Nat
- "Well, you have been avoiding me for practically 2 months now!!! I wanna know what I did wrong!!" ~Y/N
- "You mean besides coming here while I'm showering?!?!" ~ Nat
- "Nat please! I miss cuddling together under a fort we made during movie nights!! I miss 3am baking!! I miss complaining about every dumb move the Kardashians make! I miss our friendship!" ~Y/N
- "That's just it!! I don't want to be just friends!!" ~ Nat
- "W-what?" ~Y/N
- "I lo- like you!!! A lot... and I can't stand being just friends with you!!!" ~ Nat
- "I love you too, Nat...." ~Y/N
- "You do...?" ~ Nat
- She would have the most vulnerable look in her eyes
- her eyes would be glassy with tears as her bottom lip trembled slightly
- "Yeah... I was terrified that I was the only one..." ~Y/N
- You would lean in slightly when you'd stop
- "Can I kiss you?" ~Y/N
- "Yeah..." ~ Nat
- Consent = 🥵🥵
- The two of you would spend hours in the shower...
- 😉😉😏😏
AFTERMATH
- Natasha would be the best girlfriend
- Peppering your face with kisses every morning to wake you up
- Bringing you, your favorite flowers whenever you two had a date
- which was every week
- Reading you stories like 'Little Women' when you couldn't sleep
- Her calling you Russian pet names will never fail to make you blush
- "Morning, moya lyubov'! Did you sleep well?" ~ Nat
- "Thank you, detka!" ~ Nat
- "Ya tebya lyublyu, dorogoy..." ~ Nat
- And in turn you were just as good as a girlfriend to her
- Comforting her whenever she would have a nightmare about her past
- Sitting next to her in the shower, the both of you fully clothed, when a mission goes sideways and agents had died
- "It's all my fault..." ~ Nat
- "No it's not" ~Y/N
- "It is!! I was in charge! And I let them die..." ~ Nat
- "Babe, you did everything you could. The intel you got from the mission was clearly altered and it was a trap! You brought back as many people as you could and you saved over 20 kids from getting trafficked! That's a huge win. And yeah, it sucks that agents died, but I know that they would be proud that they sacrificed their lives so that those kids will have a better life! You're not gonna feel better sitting here feeling sorry, you have to honor what those agents did and thank them." ~Y/N
- "I love you so much, detka. Thank you for being here." ~ Nat
- "'Course... where else would I be? And I love you so much too." ~Y/N
- Reassuring her that she had wiped her ledger squeaky clean
- Of course she still had her moments of doubt but you were always there guiding her through it
- Learning Russian so the two of you could have full on conversations without the team understanding a single word
MEETING THE WIDOW FAM
- Meeting Yelena for the first and getting along amazingly
- the two of you would be working together to prank everybody
- like one time, the two of you painted all of Tony's Iron Man suits Captain America colors
- Or another time where you wrapped Sam's room in saran wrap
- took him nearly 4 hours just to cut through everything you guys wrapped
- When you met Melina and Alexei, the two were cautious around you
- but they soon opened up to you when they realized that you weren't gonna harm them
- Exchanging recipes with Melina
- Drinking contests with Alexei which left you drunk as hell and regretting your life decision the next morning
- It was safe to say that Natasha was head over heels for you
- and you for her
- And that was all that mattered to anybody
↠↠↠ 
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elysiansparadise · 1 year
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Their mind is a wonderful world, their personality charming and charismatic and a shy heart capable of helping and supporting those close to them.
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Aquarius Rising: Unique and loyal friend
These people grew up with an idea, to be different from everything they got used to seeing in their day to day. They could have grown up seeing many things that they didn't like, which could lead them to do things their own way and they could have difficulties with some people of authority because of it. A feeling of not fitting in either with your family or with people your age, which led you to fully appreciate when you felt that click with someone, being one of the companies, the most constant, fun and accepting. Your autonomy and independence are the most important things to you, you are always looking to forge your own path and leave your mark on whatever you are passionate about.
Although money is necessary to survive in our world, people with Pisces in the 2nd house tend to have a different approach to economic issues. They will not hesitate to use that money to help other people, coming to show many altruistic touches from a young age. They should learn to balance what they give and what they receive, because it is likely that on occasions they sin out of kindness and lend or give money to people who they will never return. Many of them may have a tendency to spend their money on their hobbies, especially if these are linked to art or esotericism, and sometimes they may feel that they spend money as fast as it comes into their hands. Their creativity and originality is something that gives them that confidence boost, it's something they feel proud of themselves. Something I have noticed is that they seem to have a unique and very close appreciation of art, especially music. Feeling that they can do things their own way, that they are not tied to something or someone gives them a sense of security, as well as the power to create whatever their mind wants. As it is a house linked to self-esteem, it can tell us about a certain variability in it, a lot of modesty on the part of the native and not knowing how to react to compliments, and although they do not know how, they will treasure it with great affection. They value things that are a little deeper, they don't like superficialities of any kind and they will always look for what seems most sincere and significant to them.
The mind of those with Aries in the 3rd house is admirable. Independent and quick thinking, these natives are people who remain firm to their own ideals, opinions and do not seek to please others, they seek autonomy in its maximum splendor. They are excited by the idea of ​​connecting with people who, just like them, have a mind of their own, one that is not biased by pleasing people behaviors or attitudes. They easily fascinate others, because they say what they think without fear of what might happen, they are firm and blunt with what they say, with a quick intellect capable of quickly understanding ideas of any kind. They have a tendency to be easily distracted and lose interest after doing something for a long time, they constantly seek mental stimuli and that is precisely what makes them have very varied interests. They are very ingenious people when it comes to making comments, they stand out for their great sense of humor, since this is random and capable of seeming hilarious to anyone. A mixture of reasoning and humor. They love the idea of ​​constantly learning new things, and if possible, doing it on their own, as it is something they enjoy doing more independently. In the case of having siblings, the relationship can oscillate between being dynamic and fun and having many differences with them, they are not usually very attached or demonstrative to each other but they can support each other when necessary.
With Taurus in the 4th house it is very likely that the native sees his home as something monotonous in some sense, the same environment, the same discussions, everything seems to have been the same for the natives. Something that absolutely all these natives grow up with is the desire to have something stable in their lives, to finally have a home that gives them peace and conformity, and when they finally find something that gives them that stability and tranquility, they don't let go easily. Somehow their environment influenced that need to protect what is theirs, to keep the things that they consider important and not to show vulnerability so easily. And it's not that they aren't emotional, on the contrary, they are very emotional, it's just that they reserve a large part of their feelings. This Taurus overlay also indicates that they may feel closer to one of their parents than to the other, since with the latter they tend to feel some distance or even distrust in some cases. Those who really know them will know that they can be very stable people in their relationships, people who fill their loved ones with details and security, as well as being reliable people who will always try to be there for those they love, either to listen to them or advise them. In order for them to feel emotional comfort, closeness with those they love is crucial, even if their adventurous and inquisitive personality encourages them and makes them attract changes, they do not like changes as much as is often rumored, stability and trust are things that they treasure and irregular or inconstant displays of affection cause them disgust.
Mercury ruling the 5th house is something very fascinating that brings many interesting suitors to the natives. Having Gemini in the 5th house makes the native master the language of seduction, makes them very adept at flirting and realising the true intentions of the people who want them, they are very observant and attentive to the actions of those who say they have an interest in them and are not fooled by them. Many different people can be attracted to them, because there is a playful and jovial beauty in them. Despite this appearance, these natives do not mince words and games, they are looking for a mental connection, someone to talk to for hours and someone who knows how to keep their attention. In terms of hobbies, many of them may like to read romance or drama novels, they will enjoy movies of these genres and even comedy ones, and of course, they can be excellent writers, especially if they have a metaphorical or poetic way of writing. From a very young age they begin to consider whether or not they want to have children, and regardless of what they choose, these natives tend to connect very well with children and have that facility to understand and communicate with them.
Having Cancer in the 6th house, that is, the house of health, it is necessary for the native to work a lot in their emotional world, since many of them may have this tendency to get sick due to some emotional discomfort that is projected on a physical level. Many of them may not sleep due to stress or intrusive thoughts, just as they may have irregular eating periods due to their emotional state. Many of them seem to understand very well the needs and emotions of other beings, both human and animal. Since I mentioned it, you can feel very close to animals and they will always be kind, loving and helpful to them, even if they are not your pets. These people seek to work for a specific reason, often a cause or a goal, and it is unlikely that they decide to dedicate to something just because they will be paid well, they seek to feel comfortable with their work and do something that they really like, and feel that it is of some use to them and to others. It is likely that these natives get bored doing household chores and may procrastinate doing them, considering them very boring and monotonous. Something very common in them is constantly doing things they used to do as children, whether it's watching the same movies they loved so much or listening to songs that take them back to moments they treasure. They may have a tendency to melancholy and some mood swings.
These people do not seek to be like someone, they seek to be themselves and do things their way, which makes them stand out from the crowd and attract attention. Leo in the 7th house manifests itself as a charming and charismatic person even if the native himself does not perceive himself that way. Very protective and stable people in their relationships, this without neglecting the fun and joy that they seek to bring to those they love the most. Despite this, the natives could feel invisible to others who claimed to love them, therefore, what they seek in a relationship is attention, perseverance and a noble heart willing to love them as much and with the intensity with which they love themselves. They make clear that they don’t need someone to be happy, and they seem to be okay without any partner, but sometimes it can be due to the fear of becoming dependent or loving a person who will leave them. They give their partners that passion for living, reasons to smile and lots of love. They are capable of making their loved one feel the most attractive person in the world, as well as the luckiest. They will always look for the happiness of both as a couple, and they will seek to support their partner unconditionally. They tend to get carried away more by their emotions when they are in a relationship and they will always take care of that love that brings so much euphoria to their lives. Lucky to attract the attention of others. This placement indicates that the native can marry a passionate, ambitious person who will make their love for them very evident.
There is too much going on in their internal world, and that is what we will explore through Virgo in the 8th house. Many of them struggle with this tendency to overthink things, from why what happens in their lives happens, to why people have certain attitudes towards them [whether good or bad]. These people may have felt that at some point in their life they were being asked to be perfect, whether it was their family, friends or even themselves who wanted to achieve perfection because they felt that there was something wrong with themselves. Being ruled by Mercury, it enhances the curiosity of the native, who will love to talk and discover all those topics that seem interesting to him. They tend to be very interested in things that many others find strange, taboo or very complex. They tend to be attracted to intelligent and mysterious people with a cunning sense of humor. Since we are talking about attraction, we must say that these people may seem aloof or indifferent, but they carry a great sexual desire that is simply subtle in the eyes of others. This independent personality that anyone would notice about them is what is often seen as irresistible to others. The subject of domination can be something very attractive for them [either dominating or being dominated], in addition, they seek to satisfy all the fantasies of their partner in various ways and find pleasure through the pleasure of their partner.
Sometimes what seems different or very distant to us can be terrifying, but it is not the case of these natives, who are fascinated and enchanted even with the small details of other cultures or countries. Libra in the 9th house gives them the ability to appreciate different types of beauty and to connect harmoniously with many kinds of people regardless of their origin. They are enchanted by the idea of ​​knowing the unknown, of being able to have the opportunity to travel and see those places that have always caught their attention. Art is something very beautiful to them, they are in awe of art and it would not be surprising that many of them do some kind of art as a hobby. They are interested in social issues around the globe, and have a strong belief that we are all and should be treated equally. Justice is something very important to them and they always stand up when witnessing situations of injustice. This placement can indicate studying something related to humanities, design, art or even law. The union is something crucial for them, and although they have a strong individuality, they understand that unity is strong and necessary on many occasions, they will be willing to help people who need it. They teach other people the beauty and joy that sharing time or thoughts with someone can bring, likewise many people may feel that these natives are experts in connecting and understanding others no matter how different they may be.
There is something fascinating running through the aura of these natives and the person responsible for this is Scorpio in the 10th house. There is something about them that makes them fascinating in the public eye, something magnetic that makes you unable to take your eyes off them and the more you see their look, the more reasons it gives you to keep watching. They draw attention quite easily, as they are a mix of mystery and sexyness, standing a few feet from you but feeling so far away at the same time. These natives can have somewhat of a mixed reputation, while some view them as unapproachable, others may describe them as controversial, whether due to their unconventional ideals, actions, or simply labelling them. These natives seek to project themselves as strong and unbreakable people, they dislike feeling that they have revealed a lot about themselves or that they have shown themselves to be vulnerable in some way. Mars and Pluto rule this house, the career house, so you are blessed with the ambition of both planets, as well as perseverance and leadership skills. You can suggest that they will work on something in which they have a leadership position, where they make important decisions or that allows them to transform or make big changes in some area.
Sagittarius in the 11th house can give us many interesting interpretations. The first is that once conversing with them, these natives can seem more sociable than they really are. Many of them know how to have fun, and have that unique ability to light up the atmosphere of the site and the mood of others, however they give a very special meaning to the term "friendship" and that is that although it is crucial for them to know someone with whom they share points of view and a sense of humour, they seek loyal and deep company, with whom they can ask to talk about many topics no matter how deep or personal they are. This house is ruled by Jupiter, so it augurs charisma, charm and popularity [whether in real life or on the internet], likewise, it also indicates that through their work they can make a lot of profit [especially if Jupiter it's here or in earth houses]. The person can get a lot of luck through working with others. They can have that facility to create friends through the internet or with whom there is a lot of physical distance. They are very visionary people with many long-term plans, it is likely that they work on many things or projects simultaneously, we must mention that there is a probability that some of these natives procrastinate.
With Capricorn in the 12th house there is friction between you and the world around you, very subtle for them, but one that presses on your chest and hits your mind every time you interact with someone. A part of you wants to connect with others and forge lasting bonds with lots of people, but memories of a lonely past where attempts were crushed by feelings of not fitting in and being judged have made you shut down and forget the idea, that dream of clicking with people. Showing yourself in control of the situation, even of yourself but deep down you fear. Fears, it's something we all have... but what about you? What can a being as sublime as you fear? Falling into a routine, doing what others tell you to do, or feeling like you can't forge your path seems terrifying. But if there is something that you fear more often than this, it’s having even the slightest proof of failure, the fear of taking a wrong step that will bring down your efforts, feeling that there is no reward for working hard. You want to stand out and feel like you are successful, being just yourself, you could be compared a lot in the past either by others or by your younger self, so you developed the need to do things on your own, the way that you want and of course, being someone unique. Burdened with guilt, emotions and a negative perception of yourself that you try to supply and alleviate by achieving great things and living up to the high expectations you set for yourself. If you only knew that your mere presence, that your actions, your dreamy side, your ambitions and how you pursue them are truly inspiring to those around you. "Be the person you would have liked to have by your side." Many times you felt alone, especially when things fell apart, but you know that you don't want to be that for others. The people who are with you feel capable of achieving whatever they want to achieve because they have your support, they have your vision, and most importantly, you are there. You do not need to prove yourself to anyone, not even to yourself, you are a person deserving of good things and good company. Future doesn’t have to be the way your past was, it’s going to be alright, love.
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mcdonaldsnumberone · 1 year
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I'M IN TROUBLE!
when your private relationship is found out by the public
gender neutral reader
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ISAGI YOICHI!
caught completely off guard!
Isagi started dating you out of a place of pure adoration, and in all honesty, he genuinely thought everything would work out with time. He never thought that dating would get so messy now that he’s gone pro, he didn’t think so many people would be this invested about who he’s dating. He wants to respect your boundaries, and he knows that not everyone likes being put under that much spotlight. But when somehow, someone manages to get wind of the fact that he’s dating you, he lets you take the reins as to how you want to manage things. Do you want to keep things private? His affections for you are reserved for closed doors! Do you want to open things up? He’ll start bringing you up in interviews! Isagi wants you to move at your pace, and he wants you to remember that he’s your Yoichi before he’s anybody else’s.
“...So they found us out, huh?” You sighed, shaking your head slightly at the leaked paparazzi pictures that were flooding your timeline. It was undoubtedly a picture of you and him, no matter how blurry the image might have been. Isagi’s grinning like a happy puppy in it, and you’re there next to him. It’s a candid of you pressing your lips to his cheek.
“I’m working with my manager to find out who took it,” Isagi offered. He smiled at you apologetically, and he pulled you closer to him. “ I… I understand if it might lead to some difficult discussions.”
You rested your head on his chest. The comforting th-thump of his heartbeat anchored you momentarily, pushing past all the panic that was pounding on the inside of your skull. You knew you were buckling up for an unconventional relationship the very second you accepted the young striker’s confession, but you didn’t think reality would catch up with you so soon.
“Before you ask: no, I’m not going to break up with you.” You glanced up at him with a coyish smile. “I figured that this day would come eventually. So what if they find out? It’s not like anything should come in between us because of that. I mean, if anything, you being taken ought to chase away any suitors you might have-”
“-You know I’ve never held anyone in my heart except for you,” Isagi cut you off, and he stuck his bottom lip at the thought of dating anyone other than you. “I’d rather stay single my entire life than not have you.”
You reached up towards his head, and you ruffled his beautiful black hair. What did you do to deserve this boy? It felt like the entire world was coveting him. He was the new up-and-coming ace striker from the mysterious Blue Lock program. Who wouldn’t want a piece of him?
Yet here he was, cradling you to his chest. Head over heels for you, Isagi wouldn’t entertain anyone except for you, regardless of how open your no-longer-secret relationship to him was.
“I love you, Yoichi.”
“I love you too. We’ll figure this out. As we always do.”
BAROU SHOUEI!
keeps pushing ahead!
Barou has never cared about what other people have thought of him. As long as they recognized him as their superior, he did however he pleased. That was how he was even with dating you. While he did a good job keeping things hush-hush for your sake and cleaning up any stray details, the moment the bubble pops, he’s quick to immediately shut down anyone who has any complaints. The instant he thinks anyone has an issue with you, he’s glaring them down. If a reporter asks too many personal questions, he’s cutting them off. He’s still incredulously selfish and egotistical, but he’s doing it for your sake. He’s fully aware that he’s not everyone’s favorite person, but the last thing he wants is for you to take the brunt of that. Once your relationship is outed, he might even become more protective of you than he was before. Either way, he doesn’t want to disturb the trust you have in him, and he’ll continue smacking down anyone that has beef with him.
“Was he getting too close?”
“No, Barou, he was fine.”
“But the interviewer looked like he was asking too many personal questions. Are you sure you’re fine?”
You smiled, shaking your head exasperatedly. Your boyfriend leered at the retreating silhouette of the reporter, and he pulled you close to his side. He wrapped an arm around your shoulders, practically glowering with such a hateful aura that you realized for the first time in your life that these poor reporters were probably risking their lives every time they approached him for anything.
“I have you with me. I’m sure anyone with half a brain cell would know not to mess with you,” you expertly consoled him. You placed a hand over his, scanning the room to make sure there wasn’t anybody else that would want to speak to either of you. 
Barou’s dating life had quickly been flipped upside down after his texts had been leaked, and while it was a lot for you to take in at first, you thought you dealt with things pretty gracefully. You and Barou decided to come clean to the public, and if anything, it only brought you closer to him. It was fun, being able to finally talk about dating him openly and without needing to watch your back, and seeing Barou get all antsy was rather enjoyable too.
“You’d be surprised,” he grumbled. “Those Blue Lock idiots have a hard time not stealing shit off of me.”
“That’s Blue Lock,” you giggled. “Most people in society are pretty good about not taking things that belong to others.”
He lifted your hand to kiss the back of it gently, letting out a small huff. “They better. If I catch anyone staring at you for too long, I’ll make them regret it.”
You nodded sagely, all-too-used to Barou’s violent but well meant sentiments. “Much appreciated, Barou.”
MICHAEL KAISER!
gets even more annoying. im so sorry i wish he was normal too.
It takes every single fiber inside of Kaiser to not go screaming his victory off the rooftops when you agree to start dating him. Frankly, you’re more surprised that you’ve managed to keep things under wraps for this long. He’s courted you in the most outlandish ways possible that you thought surely somebody somewhere must have picked up the reason why Kaiser’s been buying out every flower shop in a good ten mile radius. He’s persevered just for you, even though he’s bemoaned how tragic it is that he can’t show off his beautiful partner to the whole wide world. But now that the word’s out, Kaiser can finally live out the power couple fantasy that he’s always drooled over! He’ll openly spoil you with all sorts of gifts and shower you with as many kisses and compliments as he wants in public, parading around with your arm in his knowing that you were meant for the public’s adoration just as much as he was.
“Kaiser,” you started. The annoyance in your voice was thick, and you could pretty much feel every vein in your body popping from how much self-control it was taking to not blow your lid. “Kaiser, I thought we left the excessive bouquets behind us once we made it official.”
“Well, it’s like we’re dating for realsies-realsies now. Is it wrong for me to want to spoil you so much? You’re my darling, my sweet darling who I love more than anyone in the world,” the blond giggled, proudly holding up the giant bouquet of blue roses. The flowers were wrapped beautifully in colorful paper, and you could tell that they were raised and prepared with an expert hand. These weren’t cheap flowers, and you could bet your left kidney that the bouquet would cost more than anything you’ve ever owned in your life. 
“Kaiser,” you repeated with a sterner tone. The boy frowned, clearly sensing your disappointment.
“Do you not like them? I can always get you another bouquet-”
“-I thought I told you not to spoil me with such lavish gifts.” You still reached your arms out and took the bouquet for him, not able to bear the hurt expression he had. The last thing you wanted Kaiser to think was that you didn’t love him back or that his affections were wasted on you, but you’d much rather escape the public’s scrutiny when it came to Kaiser romping outside and raising up a storm in his attempts to impress you. “I’d much rather have you instead. But still… Thank you for the flowers. They’re truly lovely.”
He perked up when he noticed the way you ran your fingers over the blossoms, the same blue roses that were emblematic of him. He struck his usual shit-eating grin, sticking his chest out proudly as he pushed his long blond hair back.
“You’re very welcome,” he laughed. “Next time, you should come buy them with me so the paparazzi can get pictures and talk about how good you look with me, and then we can go out to a-”
“-If you do that, you’re going to sleep on the couch for the next decade.”
He spluttered, “B-But darling-! That’s not very fair!”
DON LORENZO!
cool as a cucumber!
Lorenzo’s always been a pretty chill guy outside of soccer. Even when he’s playing his role on the field, he’s kept his level head at shutting down any striker that comes his way. He’s relaxed even when it comes to dating you, and as long as you’re fine with calling the shots, he’s fine with whatever it is you want to do. Maybe that was why you managed to keep your relationship with him private for so long, because no one ever suspected that he’d be up to something behind closed doors. But even when word gets out, he puts his hands up and grins, almost as if to say ‘you guys finally got me.’ He likes having curve balls thrown at him; how else is anyone supposed to raise their value? Maybe this is a test to show the world how much you’re worth to him, and being appraised in the eyes of the public is the best way to show how much the two of you are truly meant for each other.
“You know,” Lorenzo's lanky arm wrapped around your waist, and his hand rested right above your hip. The security guards around you keep up their job, forming a protective barrier around you and the laidback defender as the two of you stroll through the streets of Japan to go sightseeing. “I thought you’d make more of a fuss than this when we were found out. I guess we got lucky that the cat got out of the bag overseas rather than back home in Italy, huh?”
You shrugged. You could see passerby craning their heads or going on their tiptoes to steal glimpses at the two of you, yet if Lorenzo caught onto it, he made no sign. He looked like the perfect example of composed leisure. A comfortable smile on his lips, sleepy eyes, and the way he was draped all over you made it obvious that it didn’t matter to him what everyone else thought. 
“They were going to find out eventually. Might as well rip the bandaid off in one fell swoop. Don’t you agree?” You asked. You peered up at him with loving eyes, and Lorenzo moved himself to steal a kiss off of your forehead. You laughed brightly at the gesture, finding it easier to ignore the stares of the crowd around you.
“Yeah,” he calmly agreed. “Especially if it means getting to kiss you like that in public. You have no idea how hard it is to pretend there’s nothing there. I’d much rather be able to hold your hand and take you out on nice dates without worrying about what others might think. Pretty freeing to have that option open now.”
“You better stay true to your word then.” You placed your hand on top of his hand, the one that was on top of your hip. You laced your fingers into his, smiling from ear-to-ear at the thought of finally being able to do all those couple-y things out in the open without fretting so much about the public. “I’ll hold you accountable.”
“Hold me accountable all you want,” the dark-haired man chuckled before stealing another kiss from you. “This is just the beginning for the two of us.”
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unbidden-yidden · 5 months
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Okay something I haven't really had the words for so far is to describe the surreal weirdness of interacting with Current Events™️ as a ger.
Partially this has been me trying not to make this about my feelings, and partially this is a lack of ability to articulate the feelings anyway. But I'm gonna try because I think others might be in the same boat.
So one of the interesting things about being a Jew by Choice is that a number of us don't have any prior connections to Judaism. We are not culturally Jewish when we start, we do not have Jewish family or ancestry, and we are not joining a Jewish family through marriage. We just.... felt drawn. Called, if you will. A lot of us in that boat are seekers, moved by some moment of truth or divine connection.
At any rate, that leaves us in a weird position when it comes to Jewish cultural trauma, both new and old. We don’t carry the ancestral trauma of knowing we have lost literal family to atrocities, but we accept that may be our future. We don’t have the literal trauma, but the collective grief and community trauma seeps into your bones very quickly, the more you identify with the Jewish people. We don’t have the literal trauma, but we then worry about whether we also lack the resilience that has sustained Jews by birth throughout history.
"We are made of strong stuff! Your ancestors passed on their strength!" An excellent and true statement for many, but what if our specific ancestors did not? Worse: what if they were on the other side of the equation?
We are also confronting, for the first time, the reality of seeing how few people care about Jews outside of other Jews. For many born Jews, that makes this a time to consolidate into family, to hunker down. For gerim, we find strength in community but many of us have family that do not and cannot fully understand (and honestly many of us are praying our families don't understand it for any number of reasons.)
So we are processing this for the first time as adults, outside of a Jewish family. And it's surreal and weird and hard and alienating and you feel both like you are inside and outside of the community. You are profoundly affected, but do you have any right to complain? You chose this. You knew what was coming, probably. This kind of antisemitism? Brutally predictable, if you know Jewish history. You have survivors' guilt and secondhand trauma, but other people have it far worse, far more personal, and so it feels like there's no appropriate space to discuss that. You want to speak up and also, you don't want to draw attention to yourself. You want people to see you. You want to hide. This is the only thing anyone in your community can focus on, and you are struggling the same way. It's been two months and you need to snap out of this. This doesn't hurt you directly. But it does. It does. Because no matter how isolated you feel, you cannot separate yourself from your people.
Idk it's a lot. But I'm fine. I'm fine, of course.
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