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shianhygge-imagines · 4 years

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The Referral [Mentor Hannibal/Reader]

Fandom: Hannibal Word Count: ~ 2,782 words Genre: Drama Pairings: Mentor Hannibal/Female Reader ; Hannibal Lecter/Will Graham

With Netflix now streaming all three seasons of Hannibal, I've taken the time to binge watch my favorite TV show of all time once again. And then, I took a look at one of the one shot series that I had going on this platform and Archive of Our Own, by the name of "A Monster Among Monsters."

This is my attempt at rewriting the one shots to form a more cohesive story, whilst simultaneously providing myself with pseudo therapy.

If you like the content I create, please consider donating to my Ko-fi! Please help me feed my tea addiction!

|Masterlist Link|

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Disorientating and out-of-place. That was what you felt as you sat down in the small and private waiting room across from a small wooden desk. The secretary, a fairly young Caucasian woman, had informed the doctor that you had just arrived for your five o-clock appointment and asked if you’d like a glass of water while you waited. You politely declined as you had a refillable water bottle stored in your backpack.

This was an entirely different environment than that of your previous psychiatrist, which had been a small office inside a brick building built in the 1980s.

The seat beneath you was a soft velvet plush intricately stitched into what seemed like hand carved oak wood. The shelves lining the wall behind the secretary-

Oh… I’ve already forgot her name… A-…Alissa?… Maybe not… but it definitely started with an ‘A’

-seemed excessive in their design.

In the small waiting room, full of grandeur and elegant tastes, only two things did not seem to belong: the secretary, and yourself.

The secretary, because despite how well-dressed and put together she was, you felt that the older woman felt distinctly uncomfortable in this setting. Her nail polish was chipped, her make up hastily done. The bags under her eyes barely concealed by the cosmetics likely indicated a lack of sleep, or trouble sleeping. She simply didn’t fit this setting naturally.

And then… there was you.

You were probably more out of place than the secretary you’d just observed. Still clothed in the ill-fitting school uniform belonging to your minimally funded high school, you looked more like the child of a patient, waiting for her mother or father to finish their appointment for the day, than a prospective patient to a renown doctor. You wondered idly if you should have packed a change of clothes before walking to school in the morning. At least, then, you wouldn’t have shown up in a navy blue polo shirt two sizes too large for your frame, and khakis bought from the discounted boys section of your local bargain store. Pairing the large clothes with your almost boyishly short hair, and it would not be too off the mark to say that you looked like a young boy.

I definitely stand out.

So much grandeur that surrounded you, and against your better judgment, you took in a deep whiff of the room.

When your father had dropped you off on the front steps of the building, promising to come pick you up once the appointment was over, you’d taken a moment to observe the exterior. Your first thoughts were that the building was rather old compared to the others in the neighborhood, that it was very well maintained, and that the good doctor must have been a man of renown and wealth to be able to afford the entire building. Now, when you decided to take a better look and smell of your surroundings, you noticed that contrary to your expectations, the old building didn’t smell like old musty wood, like you would have associated to your home town’s small public library.

Instead, the smell was that of newly treated wood, clean velvet, something floral, and a subdued sweet strawberry body spray. Your face is a carefully polite canvas even as your olfactory nerves detect the too sweet scent of the body spray, thankful that it seemed to be subdued despite it’s artificial sweetness. Your sense of smell was above average, highly sensitive to strong odors and scented perfumes, but not sensitive to the point of headaches. The strawberry body spray seemed to belong to the secretary, however, as you doubted anyone sophisticated enough to pick out the office furniture to find the the smell pleasant… Or, Dr. Dessai referred me to someone with odd quirks.

You shake your head of these thoughts and take a glance at the watch on your wrist.

16:43

You’re very early for your appointment due to your dislike of tartiness, a trait that certain members within your family did not share. All appropriate paperwork had been filled out through a form sent in via email, so there wasn’t much to do except wait for the doctor. With a sigh, you reach over to your school bag and dig out the reading assignment that your English teacher had assigned, “The Stranger” by Albert Camus.

“Maman died today. Or yesterday maybe, I don’t know. I got a telegram from the home: ‘Mother deceased. Funeral tomorrow. Faithfully yours.’ That doesn’t mean anything. Maybe it was yesterday-”

Approximately 15 minutes later

It is the click of a door latch that catches your attention, pulling your eyes away from the novel in your lap to the dark wooden door as it is pulled open. You blink, once, twice, to refocus your eyes behind prescription lenses as a tall gentleman with greying dark hair steps out of the room. Subconsciously, you inhale deeply and discreetly for the second time in the span of thirty minutes. You’re barely given a moment to process what the man smells like before brown eyes sweep to meet yours and he smiles gently.

“Oh! Doctor Lecter! I would have escorted Ms. L/N into your office.” The young woman looked almost bashful as she stands from her chair.

You take the doctor’s lapse in attention to quickly gather your things and stand as well, compelled to action because of the etiquette lesson’s you’d taken for fun at school. “It is no trouble, Amanda. I prefer to greet first time patients at the door.”

Oh… Amanda… that’s what her name was.

When Dr. Lecter’s gaze settles upon you once more, your smile is practiced and polite as you lean forwards with a singular step and the outstretching of your hand. “Dr. Lecter, it’s a pleasure to meet you!” You are forced to look up at the well dressed man, dwarfed by both his height and his charisma.

The smile widens as Dr. Lecter takes your hand in his, grip equally as firm as your own as he replies, “Ms. L/N, the pleasure is all mine.” He steps a respectable distance back to clear the doorway into his office, gesturing into it with guiding hands, “Please, do come in.”

You enter his office with a polite ‘thank you’ inhaling deeply as you pass the good doctor and into his office. Citrus. You ponder, allowing your eyes to take in the room’s decor and layout even while Dr. Lecter guides you to a set of chairs just slightly off center from the middle of the room. Parchment, old books… something floral again.

“You have a very beautiful office, Dr. Lecter.” You state matter-of-factly as you take a seat in the plush leather chair, gently setting down your bag while your eyes remained transfixed upon the books lining the shelves of the upper level.

You barely manage to tear your gaze from the design of the office to see the pleased smile on the doctor’s face as he takes the seat directly opposite of you. “I thank you for the compliments, Ms. L/N. Please make yourself comfortable.” You have to force your eyes away from your surroundings when Dr. Lecter begins to speak, “Your mother and father informed me that my colleague, Dr. Dessai referred you to me for therapy during my appointment with them last month.”

You nod, eyes meeting the good doctor’s just like your mentor had instructed you. “Yes. Daniella-… I mean, Dr. Dessai, has been my therapist since I first started going at the age of ten. But, Dr. Dessai retired last year, so she referred me to you.”

Dr. Lecter’s smile softens as he straightens up in his seat, “Yes, your mother and father have informed me as to why they sent you to therapy at such a young age, as well as why you decided to stop attending sessions. What your parents didn’t know, however, was why you wished to return to therapy after three years. Your mother and father were both quite alarmed that you wished to return.” There is something disapproving about Dr. Lecter’s gaze even though his tone doesn’t show it. You know that look from anywhere. It’s the same one that your father wears when he doesn’t agree with something you do, but accepts it nonetheless.

You tried to smile, but it quickly turned into a grimace as you tore your gaze away from the rather handsome doctor. “I’m sorry.” The compulsion to apologize forces the words from your mouth. You close your eyes and shake your head with a heavy sigh, “No, I should probably apologize to my mother and father, but they are part of the reason why I wished to come back.”

“It would be best to clear the confusion between you, Y/N. If I may refer to you by your first name?” At your nod of consent, the good doctor continues, his accented voice somehow soothing. “Please continue, Y/N. Why have you decided to continue your therapy?”

Tentatively, you raise your eyes to meet his brown ones again, noting that something about Dr. Lecter’s gaze screamed ‘all-seeing.’ Something within you screams and yells at you to tear your eyes away, but you stop yourself, wanting… needing for someone to see you without the tiresome facade. “It’s recently come to my attention that I might have stopped going to therapy rather prematurely.” You stop and gather yourself before continuing, “I’m sure my parents informed you why they wanted me to go to therapy in the first place.” Dr. Lecter nods, though you barely notice it, your mind replaying moments from the past in short bursts. “Therapy was a relief for my parents, I think. They wanted a professional to observe their child to see if I was traumatized by what my brother did to me. The sessions with Dr. Dessai were enlightening and helped me understand my own mind, but I think I was too young for the sessions to have helped me deal with the incident. My parents and I agreed to stop seeing Dr. Dessai after four years because I didn’t show any signs of trauma.” You tear your eyes away almost shamefully, “I’m beginning to recognize the wounds and the scars.”

Dr. Lecter nods and quickly writes a few notes into the notebook on the glass table beside him. When he meets your gaze again, it is filled with sympathy. “I received a summary of what you’ve endured, Y/N, but I do not have access to the official record. If you’d like to talk about it this session, I will not protest, but-” Dr. Lecter pauses and leans forward ever so slightly, eyes meeting yours so that you understand him clearly, “You have nothing to be ashamed of, Y/N. What your brother did to you was terrible, but it was not your fault.”

Your smile is forced and your voice is hoarse even as you speak, “It’s easy to say, but…” The smile turns into a frown as you force yourself to get back on track, “There’s a lot of chattering in my mind, Dr. Lecter, and I don’t think talking to my family about it will help me.”

“Have you tried talking to your mother and father about your thoughts and feelings?”

You know that the good doctor already knew the answer to his question, but you answer anyways. “My father only listens to half of everything that comes out of my mouth, and I’ve tried to talk to my mother about it, but… it’s difficult to talk to her.”

“How is it difficult to communicate with her?” His face is like stone, showing no emotion even as his eyes twinkle with an analytic ease.

“I love my mother and father, Dr. Lecter, even when I’m one of the least affectionate people I know.” Your expression pulls at all ends as it begs for the doctor to understand, “And I wish I was able to speak to them about my problems, but… with my mother, whenever I attempt to speak to her about something troubling me, she always responds with something about her past as if she and I are comparable.”

“Could it be your mother’s way of attempting to relate to you?”

“Maybe, but I don’t think so.” A heavy sigh escapes your lungs, “When I brought up that I wanted to go back to therapy, her first response was, ‘Why? Is there something wrong with you?’ as if having a mental illness was a prerequisite to going to therapy.”

“Her question could be interpreted as concern, Y/N.”

“I know that she was concerned, but then she continued with, ‘You know, when my ex-husband was beating me, I also thought about killing myself. But I didn’t. Because I’m stronger than others.’” There’s a frustrated stinging at the edges of your eyes as you force your tears away. “I don’t… How does one even respond to that, Dr. Lecter?”

“Well,” Somehow, Dr. Lecter didn’t seemed phased about your mother’s response. “Let us step back and think about this together. When your mother said what she did, how did that make you feel?”

“I felt… frustrated, belittled, aghast… betrayed… angry.” Even speaking about it now, the feelings are fresh, easily rising to the surface of your heart.

“And why do you feel these emotions, Y/N?”

“Because laid a part of myself bare to my mother when I told her that I wanted to continue therapy, and instead of asking me if I was okay or taking the time to sit down with me and talk about it, she makes light of my feelings by comparing it to her own experiences. As if saying that her situation had been more severe. As if saying I’m weak. As if implying that I don’t need therapy to solve the chatter in my head.” The more you talk the more you want to cry.

“You feel as if your mother dismissed your problems as insignificant.” It was an apt summary by Dr. Lecter, but if you were to be honest, what you had just described barely even broke the surface of your communication issues with your mother.

“When you put it like that, I feel like my thoughts were all pointless.” You sigh in exasperation.

The understanding smile on Dr. Lecter’s face makes you feel chastised, “I don’t mean to do that, but have you told your mother that you felt like she was dismissing your problems?”

“No.” The defeat in your voice and body language spoke for itself, “But I don’t know how to talk to my mother. She’s always busy with something, so I never have her undivided attention. And then, when I do manage to get a piece of her time and try to have a serious discussion with her about something, she always has to bring her own past into the conversation as well. Or, if she thinks she’s right about something, she completely dismisses any other opinion. And then, when she loses her temper, I lose my temper.” You look at Dr. Lecter, almost desperate, “And I’m no good in a heated argument, Dr. Lecter. Once people start yelling at me, I can’t help but start crying, and that definitely doesn’t help with anything. But mom especially, because she gets angrier when you cry.”

“Perhaps, Y/N, you should try to pull your mother away from whatever she has to do, and you must tell her that you want her to hear you out completely before she responds. Try to stay as calm as you can during your explanation, and if she starts to become too confrontational, take what she said and rephrase it in your head. Take a moment to respond. This way, you’ll avoid flaring either of your tempers.”

“And if she starts to get impatient?”

The smirk on Dr. Lecter’s lips has something mischievous about it, “Then tell her that your doctor instructed you to take your time. Do you understand?”

You breathe in deeply, taking in the scent of citrus again, the smell calming you. “I understand, Dr. Lecter…” Your eyes widen as you suddenly realize how sidetracked you’d gone. “Oh… um… I… forgot how we ended up speaking about this but…” The smile that rises to your lips is genuine, “I feel like a weight has been lifted.”

The older gentleman smiles at you, pleased. “I am glad, Y/N. We are here for you. So long as I can help lift that weight from you, then I believe that we are making progress. Shall we continue?”

The smile on your face widens as you take another deep breath, “Yes.”

Bergamot… He smells of Bergamot.

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#shian imagines #shianhygge #nbc hannibal #hannibal #hannibal lecter #hannibal x reader #hannibal imagine

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bohemian-napsodyy · 5 years

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Somebody Else Is All You Need (PART 2)

***There’s spoilers! if you haven’t yet, please read part 1 first HERE***

Word Count: 2.7k

Warnings: it’s sad, look out

A/N: here it is folks! the long-awaited, much-demanded part 2 to Somebody Else Is All You Need :) also, thank you to the anon who suggested Gwil play a bigger role in part 2 — you got my brain-gears turning and I can’t thank you enough ❤️

Research says it takes twenty-one days to break a habit.

If that was the case, you were never going to be able to make it a habit of not checking your phone to see if Rami had texted you.

It had been only four days. Four days since you last saw and spoke to him. And it wasn’t on good terms either.

Four days.

That was ninety-six hours without him.

Nine thousand, seven hundred and sixty minutes, which in seconds could be converted to-

You had to stop. This was getting out of control.

The more you replayed the fight in your head, the worse things got. Your mind was a pendulum, swinging back and forth between regretting leaving and then not regretting your decision. You had to face fact, Rami acted like a complete asshole.

But did that really justify you leaving the way you did?

Not to mention, Lucy was in the picture now — which was a whole other shitshow in itself, really.

You were giving yourself a headache. A four-day-long headache to be exact.

You stared up at the popcorn ceiling of your hotel room as the Weather Channel buzzed in the background. Your initial idea was to give yourself a little relaxing getaway downtown for the time being. Go see a movie, go for a swim, browse the shops here and there — anything to get your mind off Rami.

But the moment you went down to the pool, towel in hand and sunglasses on your head, something made you turn around and walk right back the way you came from. All you could see in your mind was you with him in the pool, happy together.

It just didn’t feel right, coming to a place like this without him. It made you feel worse, empty even. Were you trying to move on, or simply trying to tune everything out? The sting in your heart made you think it was more of the latter.

You were running out of things to wear. You really only had your sleep shirt and sweatpants — that was all you were wearing when you left, after all.

You went down to the gift shop to buy a swimsuit for the pool of course, but that did no good. You couldn’t even make it to the pool chair without breaking down for crying out loud.

You had to pick up more of your things from home, you knew that for certain. You couldn’t stay holed up in your pajamas in a downtown LA hotel forever. The cabin fever was starting to kick in. You felt itchy. You had to get out.

But going back home to pack more things meant you’d see Rami again. That was the last thing you wanted. You would rather go back to the pool and try to hide your sniffles from tourists and little kids splashing about the pool than go home and speak to your boyfriend.

Could you even call him that anymore?

What he did was bad, you knew that. Real bad.

Sometimes you’d wake up thinking that all he did was forget you at the bar, but then slowly Lucy would crawl back into your memory, like a sliver you couldn’t get out of your hand.

You made your decision to head back home in an instant. It was easy, really. A simple equation had popped into your mind and the result was what got you practically running from your hotel room to the car, ready to head back and pack up your stuff once and for all:

Rami + You + Lucy = error. There was no solution. But there was an explanation for the lack of solution.

He cheated on you.

The mere thought made you sick to your stomach. It was a topic you honestly didn’t even want to go anywhere near addressing. But he had six months in London. Six months in London with her.

And judging by how you found them at that party — they hadn’t been ‘just friends’ in London, either.

You jumped when your phone started ringing in the car, and you snatched your phone off the seat lightning fast.

But when you glanced at the screen, expecting to see Rami’s name on your phone, you were taken aback to find it wasn’t him calling, but instead an unknown number.

You tried to ignore the sinking feeling you got when you saw it wasn’t Rami, and set your phone back down on the seat.

You could feel yourself growing more and more anxious as you got closer to the house. What if Rami was still home, even though it was already two in the afternoon? What if he’d pull some fucked up charm-thing of his and convince you to stay?

Oh god. What if he had already moved on? What if Lucy was there?

You knew it was unlikely, but after everything that had happened in London, as well as at the party, your mind was wandering everywhere. There wasn’t any scenario you could consider ‘impossible’ anymore.

The statement you’d often tell yourself in your mind now had a question sewn into it:

Rami would never do something like that… would he?

To your relief, his car wasn’t in the driveway when you pulled in. You thanked your lucky stars you managed to come at a time when Rami had gone out. You honestly didn’t know what you’d do or say if you saw him again, you weren’t ready for that yet.

You thought you were prepared to come back home. You really thought you were.

The moment your key clicked in the lock and you swung the door open, you almost doubled over and started to cry right there. Everything hit you all too fast, all at once.

The pictures you had taken together on vacation last Christmas were still hung up on the wall. For some reason you had expected him to take them down in anger. The room still carried a faint combination of the pine candle you often loved to burn, along with the hint of spice from Rami’s cologne.

You hovered in the entry hall for a few extra moments, almost expecting him to peek over at you from the kitchen and smile that goofy grin he always wore when you came home.

“I made you tea,” He’d always announce proudly, before beckoning you further inside into the kitchen.

But there was none of that today. No tea. No Rami.

You hated what he had done. But you hated this emptiness more.

You jumped when your phone began to ring again. Swiping at your damp cheeks hastily and sniffling, you pulled out your phone and frowned.

The unknown number was calling again.

You tapped ‘decline’ and set your phone back in your pocket, only to have it start ringing once more moments later. It was still the same number.

What the hell?

“Hello?” You asked cautiously, frowning as you began to make your way upstairs to your room.

“Y/N? This is Y/N, right?”

“Yes…” You answered slowly. “Who’s this?”

“Oh, sorry.” The voice on the other line apologized, laughing a little. “It’s Gwilym. From the BoRhap party.”

You blinked in surprise, pausing on the stairs for a moment as you tried to recall if and when you gave him your number at the party. You weren’t that drunk, were you?

“Hey,” You greeted him, slightly confused but also grateful to speak to someone other than a hotel wall for the first time in four days. “I hope you don’t mind me asking but uh, how did you get my number?”

“Rami gave it to me when he was looking for you.” He explained. “He was hoping you’d reply to someone if you weren’t going to reply to him. But I never heard back from you, either. I was starting to worry.”

Oh. That made sense.

You realized Gwilym’s text must have gotten lost amongst the thirty or forty-something nutty texts Rami had sent that night. You didn’t even realize someone else had texted you.

“God, I’m sorry,” you groaned, running a hand through your hair. “It’s been just crazy over here, I’m sorry I never got back to you.

“It’s alright, don’t worry Y/N.” Gwilym replied gently. “I just wanted to see if you were doing okay. And also if you need anything.”

You sighed as you placed your empty suitcase on your bed. It looked more like a black hole at the moment rather than luggage to you.

“I’m not okay, I don’t think.” You replied quietly as you started grabbing some of your shirts and packing them in your suitcase. “I mean, I’m planning on leaving and I don’t know when I’m going to come back, and it just…”

You broke off as your voice hitched. You could feel the tears start to come back. You felt stupid for crying in front of Gwilym, who you literally just met four days ago.

“I’m sorry,” you manage to blurt out. “Everything I was honestly never expecting happened so fast and…”

“Hey, it’s okay.” Gwilym answered soothingly. “If you want… I’m in town for another few days before I have to fly back to London. I could come by for a bit? You know, if you need a friend.” You almost started to cry even more at Gwilym’s kind offer. You nodded emphatically, before remembering you were still on the phone.

“I’d really like that,” You almost laughed with relief. “Thank you.”

“Great. You’re at Rami’s place, yes?”

“Yeah — I was planning on going back to my hotel but I’ll wait for you here. It’s easier.”

“Wonderful,” Gwilym replied. “See you soon, Y/N. I’m on my way.”

“Y/N…?”

You had just hit ‘end call’ on your phone when you heard your name. Whipping around in shock, your heart stopped when you saw Rami standing at the entrance to your room. His features carried a mixed expression of anger, confusion, and absolute heartbreak. He was still wearing his coat and shoes, so you figured he must have just gotten home, heard you speak, and come straight upstairs.

But now that he was here in front of you, and after you had already spoken with Gwilym, you didn’t want to talk to Rami at all.

So instead you kept packing. Almost slamming your clothes into your suitcase as you went. Rami rushed over and grabbed your wrist to try and stop you from adding more clothes to your suitcase.

“Hey,” he whispered shakily. “Y/N, what’s going on? I haven’t seen you in four days, where are you going?”

Huh. So you weren’t the only one counting the days you’d been away.

You shook your head and tugged your wrist away from his grasp. You didn’t even want to look Rami in the eye.

“Y/N, talk to me.”

You busied yourself with trying to count the threads on the sweater you were folding. You weren’t going to look up, you weren’t going to look up, you weren’t going to-

“Y/N, please!”

Rami was yelling now. You could see out of the corner of your eye that his hand kept darting towards you, as if he wanted nothing more than to touch you again, before thinking twice about it and changing his mind.

“I’ll tell you I’m sorry a thousand times, and then a thousand times after that because Y/N, I am so, so, so fucking sorry. Please. I just want to hear you say something. Anything.”

His apology didn’t cut it for you. You were fully packed now, and you closed up your suitcase with a click before grabbing the handle and dragging it down the hall.

“Y/N, wait!”

The catch in Rami’s voice was what made you stop. It wasn’t that you listened to him, but you were taken so off guard by how broken he suddenly sounded that you froze. You didn’t want to look at him even more now, in fear of breaking into tears yourself.

“What can I do to get you to talk to me?” He pleaded. You heard footsteps as he approached you from behind, but he never touched you. “What do I have to do to get you to stay here? Do I have to beg? Do you want me to get down on my knees? Because, fucking hell, I’ll do all that and more if it means you stay for just one more day and I get to talk to you.”

That made you whip around in bewilderment. Your first instinct was to snap at him and tell him to ‘cut the shit’, but when your eyes finally met his, you saw he wasn’t joking.

Rami had sunk to his knees now. The sight alone had started to make your eyes sting again. You shook your head.

“Stop it,” You tried to hiss, but it came out as a whisper. “Stop this Rami, get up. This is ridiculous.”

He ignored you, and instead slowly wrapped his arms around your middle. You could feel his shoulders trembling as he began to cry.

“Don’t go,” he begged, his voice muffled both by tears and your shirt. “Please, Y/N, you never have to speak to me again, just don’t leave, fuck!”

You closed your eyes as tears trailed down your cheeks. This was far from what you had expected would happen when you’d inevitably have to cross path with Rami again. You thought he’d be angry, and both of you would be yelling and screaming at each other.

This was much worse.

You dropped to your knees as well, so you were now on the same level as Rami. Sighing in defeat, you gently brushed a few tears off his face.

“Please stop this,” you whispered, your composure crumbling in the form of a sob. “It’s not going to do any good. I have to leave. For now.”

“But you’ll be back?” Rami’s voice wasn’t even a whisper. You shook your head.

“I don’t know.”

Rami reached out and caressed your face with trembling hands. A new set of tears had begun to glisten in his eyes.

“I lost you once already.” His voice was wavering as he spoke. “I’m not fucking ready to see you leave again. Please don’t. We can figure this out and-”

The doorbell cut him off. That was enough of a signal to make up your mind.

“I’m sorry Rami,” You said, moving away and grabbing your suitcase. “I have to go.”

You threw your coat and shoes on and opened the door to see Gwilym standing there. He frowned in concern when he saw your tear-stained face. Without a word, he pulled you into a hug.

You looked over your shoulder just as Rami came down the stairs. He looked from you, to Gwilym, and back to you again. You could see the fire in his eyes.

“Is this where you’re going?” He demanded, nodding towards Gwilym. “Back to his place? Is this where you’ve been this entire time?”

You couldn’t believe Rami. You had put up with so much of his bullshit and this was what you got in return. Your hand tighted on the handle of your suitcase and you started to walk faster to Gwilym’s car.

“That’s real low, Y/N. You’re a coward.”

That made you stop.

You turned around, all previous sympathy you felt was completely gone.

“That makes two of us.” You spit out. You didn’t even wait for a reaction before tugging open the car door and slamming it shut.

Gwilym didn’t start the car right away. Instead, he placed a hand on your shoulder reassuringly.

“Let him cool off,” He suggested gently. “Too much has happened in such a short while.”

You could only nod as you stared blankly out the window. It felt like ages before Gwilym finally started the car.

“Where do you want to go?”

“Anywhere,” You answered with a whisper. “Anywhere but here.”

#rami malek #rami malek x reader #rami malek imagine #rami malek oneshot #elliot alderson x reader #elliot alderson #elliot alderson imagine #bohemian rhapsody #bohemian rhapsody x reader #queen #queen imagine #queen oneshot #freddie mercury #freddie mercury imagine #freddie mercury oneshot #request

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fundeadasylum · 5 years

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This Photo of Us Part 4: We Must Never Be Apart

This one is a bit shorter than the others and I apologize for that. But that was a perfect spot to end it so it had to be done. (tfw you wish you had time to illustrate this tasty fic)

There’s also a big ol’ disclaimer for some stuff at the end of this chapter.

Warnings: emotional abuse and manipulation, mild physical abuse, non-consensual bondage (not sexual!), psychological torture and abuse, drug related withdrawals, captivity, descriptions of panic attacks

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3

***************************************

He’d lost track of how long it had been.

Between passing out in the grass and the sick vertigo and unending headaches he’d been experiencing since, Jake had no idea how many days he’d been in Rosie’s care. It felt like years had been drained from his life, hours on top of his bruised and battered heart and crushing it under so much stress and time. His legs and arms were stiff and sore, his neck creaking as he moved, his spine a dull throb of pain. Moving too fast brought on a wave of vertigo that made his stomach heave and wretch, and his body was wracked by shivers and chills.

And he was tired. He was so very, very tired. The exhaustion dragged him down even more but no matter what he did, he couldn’t get enough sleep. The insomnia gnawed at his brain, chewing slowly away at his sanity as his heart ticked down his remaining minutes. No matter how low the shock setting on the collar had been, Jake knew his body had taken some damage from the device. And it was taking even more from the lack of sleep.

Jake slouched against the wall, splayed out on the bed with the sheets tangled in his legs and the heavy comforter wrapped around his shoulders. After his failed escape attempt, Rosie had carried him back inside and pushed the bed back against the wall. She’d done nothing to secure it but there was no danger of Jake trying to use it to get out the window again; he was much too weak now.

The sound of footsteps came from upstairs and Jake let his head roll on his shoulders to look at the door, his eyes lidded and tired. His bones felt rubbery and weak, jello melting in the heat around him. Too cold with the blanket off, too hot with it on.

The stairs creaked, locks jingled, and then Rosie stepped into the basement, her lips pursed in a displeased manner. Jake watched as she approached, hauling with her a couple of large shopping bags, one of which was making an awful lot of noise.

“How are you feeling today, hun, any better?” She set her bags down and pressed the back of her hand against his forehead. He flinched at her touch but didn’t pull away, “Hm, you don’t seem to have a temperature but you’re definitely experiencing symptoms like a cold. And these have been getting progressively worse. Did you get any sleep at all?”

He just stared at her. Rosie’s expression hardened,

“I asked you a question and I expect an answer. Do you want to lose more privileges?”

She’d stopped bringing him delicious home cooked meals after his escape attempt, telling him that bad behavior needed to be disciplined and good behavior could earn his lost privileges back. He’d been eating bowls of white rice and bologna sandwiches for who knew how long and he was getting tired of it.

So Jake sucked in a shaky breath and murmured, “No. No sleep.” He let his eyes fall closed and saw shapes swimming behind his eyelids. He snapped them open again and his throat clicked in a dry swallow when the phantom images remained, translucent fingers of grey smoke pressing against the edges of his vision.

“Poor, sweet thing,” Rosie cooed, smoothing his black hair from his face. Jake shivered at how hot her skin was against his, a sour taste filling his mouth as she coddled him, “I wish I knew how to help you. But you’re just being so uncooperative. If you know what’s wrong, I could end this suffering for you.” She pressed a kiss to his cheek and his skin burned where her lips had been, “I don’t understand why you want to punish yourself like this. Why won’t you let me help you? I’m only trying to do what’s best for you.”

A likely story.

Jake was pretty sure he knew what was wrong but that didn’t mean he was so eager to tell Rosie. It was some small act of rebellion on his part. Most people didn’t know because Jake didn’t want them to know and if Rosie didn’t know, then she was just another part of the general mass of humanity around him rather than a villain on a pedestal to be feared.

But this...this was too much. He could feel his mind fragmenting, splitting into slivers of who he was, breaking off to spiral slowly into a void of terror and mindless horror. This would destroy him eventually, he was sure of it.

“I…” His voice caught and shame crept over him like a wet blanket. He stared at his hands laying thin and pale in his lap, “There’s one med you didin’ get. Goin’ cold turkey on it…’s bad news.”

“What?” Rosie sounded genuinely astonished and Jake glanced up at her through his lashes, dull eyes sweeping over the startled expression on her face, “You were on more medication than just your aldosterone inhibitors and ARBs? Why didn’t you say something sooner!? Sweetie, this could have killed you!” She pressed her palms to his cheeks and lifted his head, making him look her in the eye. Jake whined at the contact, trying to pull back because it was just too much, but she dug her nails into his scalp and it felt like burning pokers searing his flesh,

“What was the medication? Tell me what it is and I can make this all go away. You just have to tell me, baby, and I can help you feel better.”

Jake only grinned at her, a lopsided, snarky thing that showed off the mad glint in his unfocused eyes, “F-fuck you. I c’n wait out the with--withdrawals. An’ then you’ll n-never know. Ha...haha…” He broke off into a wheezing, hysterical laugh that squeezed out a few salty tears. They felt like streaks of fire going down his face.

Rosie’s expression became cold and distant and she let him go, allowing him to thud back painfully against the wall. He was still grinning at her, the fear he should have been feeling muddied by exhaustion and hysteria.

“Okay,” Rosie said, taking a deep breath and letting it out again, “Okay. I see. I understand. You still seem to think that I’m trying to hurt you. Okay.” She reached down and pulled some things out of the forgotten shopping bags and knelt by the foot of the bed. Jake twisted to see what she was doing, frowning in confusion as he watched her use a power drill to screw a metal plate with a heavy ring to the wooden frame. There was something attached to the ring but no matter how he blinked, he couldn’t shake the fuzziness from his vision. He leaned back and closed his eyes, breathing deeply to steady himself. He floated for a moment that took years to pass and only came back to himself when he felt her hands on his legs.

Then there was something ice cold and heavy around his ankles.

Jake startled, jolting and pulling himself away from Rosie’s touch, his eyes wide despite his swimming vision. Something clanked loudly and dragged across the bed and his heart ached as his pulse sped up.

Chains.

He wondered if his hallucinations had really gotten that bad already. But hallucinations didn’t have weight and he could feel the heft of the black metal around his bare ankles, could feel the tug of the chains hooked through them. He pawed at the U-shaped shackles, whining and pulling and trying to unscrew the thick and heavy pin that pressed against his Achilles tendon. The chains were hooked through these pins, two separate, shortened lengths that were then hooked through a third U-shaped shackle and hooked onto the last and longest chain. The last chain was evidently cinched to the ring now fixed to the end of his bed.

Jake’s hands shook, tears spilling down his face as he gasped in shortened breaths, his heart thundering painfully in his chest. Sheer terror took over, cold sweat blistering against his fevered skin as he kicked and pulled and flailed, crying out in wordless fear at his own helplessness. White-out panic numbed his brain and all his animal brain could think was to get away. He backpedaled across the bed until he hit the opposite wall and wedged himself into the corner, shoulders bunching painfully as he pulled and yanked on the chain. The noise was deafening in his ears, so loud it rattled in his skull and made his teeth ache. His throat hurt and he couldn’t breathe and he was probably screaming but that barely registered beyond the blind panic that had consumed him.

Something warm pressed against him, caught his hands in a gentle grasp. A soft voice murmured in his ear and he couldn’t understand what they were saying but it was gentle and it was slow. Jake squeezed his eyes shut, tried to remember how to work his lungs properly, all the while shuddering with choked off sobs of fear and pain.

A soothing hand in his hair.

A soft brush of fabric against his bare arm.

“You’re so sensitive,” That voice, that voice, he knew that voice. Now if only he could get his racing thoughts to settle down, “It hurts me so much to do this to you but you’ll see, it’s better in the long run. I’m doing this for your own good, sweetie, I promise.” A kiss to his temple and it burned.

Jake’s eyes snapped open and he found Rosie inches away, smiling sadly at him as she ran her fingers through his hair. He froze, held his breath, didn’t dare move.

“Oh, honey,” She sighed and it smelled like peppermint, “You don’t need to be scared of me. This is what living with those people has done to you. They’ve made you so sick and afraid you can’t trust anyone anymore. Poor thing. But I’ll fix you, okay, I’ll make you all better. You just need to listen to me. You’ll get used to it. And then, when you’re finally free of what they’ve done to you, we can be together, forever, just like we’re supposed to be.”

She kissed him again, deep and passionate and she filled Jake’s world until he couldn’t take it anymore. He shoved her away in revulsion and wrapped his arms over his head, ducking his face between his knees. He was cold, so cold and tired and sick.

He heard Rosie shift and the weight left the bed. There was a long drag of fabric and he glanced through his fingers to see her bundling his sheets and blankets into her arms.

“NO!” He launched himself across the bed, scrabbling to snatch them away, but she stepped back with that sad and disappointed look on her face.

“I know you’re hurting but this is punishment for withholding information,” Rosie said, turning away and heading for the basement door, “You’ll get these back when you’ve decided to cooperate more. I’m going to make a phone call now. Why don’t you think about how you’ve hurt me while I’m gone.”

Jake ran for the door as she stepped through it, the chains loud as they scraped against the cement. But he never reached it. The chain wasn’t long enough and it tripped him, nearly sending him face first into the floor as he stumbled to a halt. The door shut and he heard the locks turn and then he was alone again.

He wanted to sink to the floor and die right then and there, just waste away and vanish into the earth.

But he was cold and he was tired and his entire body hurt. So he dragged himself back to his bed, crawled into the corner and curled around the pillow, shivering and wheezing and trying to ignore the flickering images and phantoms that slid back and forth in front of his eyes.

The shackles on his ankles and the thick collar on his neck were heavy and they dragged him down into a despair he hadn’t felt in a long, long time.

----

A phone was ringing

Dan starred without seeing at the tabletop, his coffee growing cold in his mug, his mind a million miles away.

The phone kept ringing.

With a blink and sigh, Dan pushed his chair out and abandoned his coffee to investigate the noise. He was surprised the ringing hadn’t brought Milo running; the boy had been feverish in his attempts to find Jake, so much so that he refused to go to school despite Dan’s protesting. And Dan didn’t have the heart to push him. He knew Milo had exhausted himself this morning running around town and asking questions again so he was probably napping up in his room.

Dan frowned; it wasn’t the house phone that was ringing. So then where…

A light was blinking on the coffee table, next to the piles of paperwork and photos the police had asked for.

Jake’s cell phone was ringing.

Dan scrambled for it, nearly falling over the couch in his effort to retrieve it,

“H-hello? Hello, Jake?”

“Um,” There was an awkward pause on the other end of the phone, “N-no, sorry, um. I thought I was calling Jake? Who is this? Do I have the wrong number?”

“Oh...oh, no, no, you don’t…” Dan sank onto the couch, shoulders slumping, “Sorry, um, he’s not...he’s not here right now. He, uh,” Dan cleared his throat, stubbornly blinked back the tears, “Anyway, um, this is Dan, his roommate. Who--who is this?”

“I’m Rosie? I...don’t know if he told you about me? We were--we’re friends but it’s been a while since we spoke and I just...I would very much like to speak with him. It’s kind of important. Is he around?”

Rosie. The girl Jake had been hanging out with. The girl he’d asked to start dating. The girl who’d rejected him. Dan wanted to feel flare of defensive anger at her for hurting Jake but he couldn’t find the energy to muster it. If anything, it broke his heart more because she was in the same boat he and Milo were.

“Um, he’s…” Dan swallowed, took a deep breath, started again, “A-actually, Miss. Rosie, this isn’t really something to...to say over the phone. Are you--can you come over to the house so we can talk about this?”

----------

I did kind of a day's worth of research on heart medications and the conditions of heart failure, etc so I am by no means an expert. Some medicines for heart attacks and related heart failures are aldosterone receptor antagonists (or aldosterone inhibitors) and angiotensin II receptor blockers (or ARBs) which are what I have Jake taking.

I'm more intimately familiar with anxiety and depression medication as I've been on several different kinds over the past couple of years. The problem with prescribing Jake anxiety medication is that sometimes it can actually INCREASE the heart rate in some instances. There are A LOT of anxiety medications and if his anxiety is as bad as it seems he should probably be carrying around a situational medication. But given that he's so secretive about his meds, he probably wouldn't want those. So I just have him taking the same stuff I do, which is venlafaxine. It can affect blood pressure but that's not a big problem. It DOES, however, need to be taken at the same time every day with food as it's an extended release capsule. The major issue comes from quitting venlefaxine without weening yourself off it properly. Quitting it cold turkey can cause dizziness, insomnia, nausea, loss of appetite, vomiting, blurred vision, and even hallucinations. The meds take anywhere from three to five days to get out of your system completely. I couldn't find anything about how long withdrawal symptoms will last but I'm betting it's no kind of pleasant experience.

To be honest the guy also seems like he should also be on trazodone to help him sleep at night but that might be too much medication interacting with each other.

Also! The U-shaped shackles I have Rosie using are actually pin anchor shackles. Ones big enough to fit around an adult male’s ankles probably can’t be purchased at your typical marina but for the sake of fan fiction I can do what I want.

#micoverse #micoverse: this photo of us

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virmillion · 5 years

Text

Ibytm - T minus 11 seconds

Masterpost - Previous Chapter - Next Chapter - ao3

Words: 1,603

One of the many things on which Logan has long prided himself is his punctuality. Hand in hand with this is his insistence upon keeping appointments. These are the two thoughts running through Logan’s mind as he brazenly breaks both of those personal rules on this Friday morning. He’s never been one for superstition (‘not even a little stitious,’ in Roman’s unfortunate and inadequate words), but from the moment he ignored his alarm in favor of holding Virgil a little while longer, something in his mind quickly grew certain he’d made a mistake. He can trace the exact second, actually—when he let Virgil get back to sleep, blissfully ignoring his own lack of a consistently salaried career—when everything started going wrong. He should’ve gotten up at the first alarm, or better yet, stayed in bed all day and phoned it in. He did neither, and the consequences smacked him in the face with a wet paper towel.

He stubbed his toe on the table in the kitchenette, he forgot to prepare his overnight oatmeal last night, the car took far longer than normal to start up, there was a car with its hazards on taking up a whole lane right outside the apartment parking lot, half the lights on the way to work were out or blinking red, his jacket (the one Virgil helped him pick out at Micah’s store) got caught and ripped when he closed the car door on it, and Miss Katie-Lee dumped an absurd binder of assignments on him the moment he clocked in—exactly on time, rather than early like any other day. Logan does not believe in fate, but that string of irritating coincidences did nothing to improve his attitude.

“Why are you in such a crap mood?” Roman prods, rolling his chair over as Logan works through his normal break time.

“Because I was late to being early, and because I’m busy. Go away.”

“Wow, someone’s feeling kinda rude. Guess you didn’t take that vacation, then, huh?”

“What, in the twelve hours since I last saw you? Clearly not. And like I said, I’m busy, so unless you have something important to offer me, go away.”

“Did Katie-Lee drop all this on you just today? Dude, that hardcore blows.”

“Obviously I know that. Miss Katie-Lee clearly thinks I can handle it, or she wouldn’t have given me it. Given it to me. Whatever.”

“Still sucks.”

“Still busy.”

Roman, despite Logan’s adamant protests, grabs a few folders from the stack and shuffles through them, plucking one out at random. “Maybe you’re just overthinking some of these. Can I help?”

“No. Literally the only thing you can do for me that would be helpful is leave me alone.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be taking your break right now?”

“Aren’t you supposed to be taking yours?”

“Yeah, I actually came over to see if you wanted to get in on our fetch quest. We’re doing an order en masse. Think we’ll get Virgil?”

“Hard no. He’s probably still asleep, and if he’s awake, he’s certainly not doing anything productive.” Logan does not particularly love how thoroughly laced with irritation his tone is, but he absolutely does not have it in himself to lighten up.

“Just let me help you with these, man, you’ve got way too much on your plate.”

“They wouldn’t have promoted me if they didn’t think I could handle it.”

“Well, they promoted me , too, so maybe I’m supposed to handle some of it.”

“Well, they promoted you after me, so maybe you should just piss off and leave me alone.” Logan can feel himself being a jerk, being a completely awful person for Roman to have the misfortune of being close to, but he doesn’t know how to make himself stop. Today started out so well, too, and here he is ruining it. That realization only makes him feel worse. Not bad enough to fix his attitude, but pretty bad regardless.

Roman, however, has worked with Logan for long enough to know how to handle this sort of thing from him. He rolls his chair back to his own desk, messing with his phone in silence as Logan exhales and raps a fist against his temple, fruitlessly trying to stave off the headache that’s undoubtedly on its way.

On through the rest of what should be his break and past the time where he normally answers emails and helps his colleagues with their respective (and objectively easier) problems, Logan continues chipping away at the stack. It seems more bottomless with each passing second, especially when a few emails ping into his ‘urgent’ filter and multiply the work he still has left. Given how focused he forces himself to be to power through as much as he can realistically manage, it should come as no surprise that Logan doesn’t notice the pack of people crowded around his chair until someone taps him on the shoulder.

“I already told you, I don’t—” Logan cuts himself off mid-sentence as he turns to see Micah with his arm outstretched, a visitor’s badge dangling from his neck. “I don’t—I didn’t—what are you doing here?”

“Roman called in the cavalry.”

“I can see that.” This is about the most coherent sentence Logan can manage as he takes in the rest of the people Roman apparently rallied—Cassidy and Alex, of course, along with Joy and almost all of the newer fifth floor interns. “Roman? Care to explain?”

“We are here to help,” Roman says firmly. Before Logan can even begin to protest, Roman reaches across his desk and snatches away the binder of assignments.

“Hey, you can’t just—”

“I can and I did. Shut up and sit in your chair and let us help you.”

“But you aren’t supposed to—”

“And yet we are, so shut up and sit in your chair and please, for the love of all things on and beyond this planet, let us help you .”

Logan pulls his lips between his teeth and watches Roman pass out the folders, and though he certainly doesn’t consent to anything that happens thereafter, he’s not about to go complaining to Miss Katie-Lee. Because he doesn’t want her to know he’s slacking, of course. Not, um, not for any other reason.

“We are more than just colleagues,” Roman says gently, leaning down to pat Logan’s shoulder. Logan says nothing, watching the apparent cavalry disperse to tackle the work for him. “I don’t know exactly how far you want people to go to prove they care about you, and if it takes this much, then, well, all your friends up until now have severely sucked. Logan, look, look at me, okay?” He does. His heart wrenches at the insistent look in Roman’s eyes. “We care about you so, so much, even if you don’t have it in you to care about yourself. Now sit there and don’t look at your computer screen for at least thirty minutes, and let other people show you that you deserve to be cared about. We are not just here to collect a paycheck and go, and neither are you.”

Logan stares very intently at his desk and tries to ignore the hot tears pricking at the corners of his eyes. It takes every ounce of his concentration not to shrug off Roman’s hand, which is rubbing reassuring circles on his back. Once the tears do fall—hypothetically, of course—well, it would be (and hypothetically is) very polite of Roman not to mention them, and to silently offer a tissue.

It is with nothing short of pure, genuine relief that Logan clocks out—late, but still—having finished the last couple assignments that Roman begrudgingly allowed him to handle on his own. He had to let him finish those, since Logan needs them for his presentation coming up. Not really something you can pawn off on your work colleagues.

It is with nothing short of pure, genuine horror that Logan realizes the day on which he has clocked out late.

Friday.

Movie night.

Which Logan has never missed before.

Ever.

It’s a good thing there’s no patrol cars out to catch him going fifteen over the limit on his way home.

He opens the door to the apartment as quietly as he can manage, more than a little disheartened by the silence waiting beyond. Inside, he sees the television screen displaying Netflix’s message asking whether Virgil is still watching. Evidently not, as Virgil is sprawled out across the couch and snoring softly. Two coffee mugs sit on the table, one empty, the other full.

What’s that old adage about falling asleep angry, going to bed without resolving a fight? ‘Don’t do it, you absolute fool? You complete and utter buffoon? Think you have the power to cut God’s hair with Krafty Krinkle-Kut safety scissors? Huh? Punk?’ Logan briefly wonders what the ramifications of ignoring that might be, given that this is the second night in a row that it’s happened. He pulls off his cardigan (which now sports a glorious rip up the right side) and drapes it over Virgil, careful not to wake him as he gently pries the remote from his hand. After clicking the television off and preparing his overnight oatmeal, he turns out the few remaining lights and heads into the bedroom, removing the layers of clothing constricting his lungs as he goes.

The bed feels much colder than normal. He kicks all the covers and sheets off, curls up in a ball in the middle of the mattress, and tries to sleep.

It takes hours.

He’s freezing.

#labhwrites #mine #i'll bring you the moon #ibytm

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hemmovation · 6 years

Text

Ghost of You (Kim Taehyung)

This was inspired by Ghost of You by 5sos

Genre: Angst/Fluff

Pairing: Kim Taehyung/Reader

Word count: 2885

Sitting up in what I assumed was my room, I could feel a massive pounding in my head. The room was nearly pitch black, the blackout curtains I had bought doing a good job of keeping out the light. If my headache was this bad while I was sitting in the dark, I could only imagine how much worse it would be in the light. As I woke up a little more, the heavy feeling in my heart returned, my heart seemingly sinking into my stomach. Rubbing my eyes, I slowly moved to get up, trying to avoid further aggravating my head. I peeked out from one eye to look at the alarm clock on his side of the bed. The obnoxious red numbers informed me that it was nearly one in the afternoon.

I finally made my way to the kitchen, keeping my eyes closed pretty much the whole way there. Blindly searching through my medicine cabinet, I pulled out some pain killers, popping a couple of them into my mouth and gulping down some water. After I downed the whole glass, I slowly opened my eyes, squinting at the light once I did. Our My apartment seemed to empty without him here. I struggled to spend my time here alone since he left, so now I’m usually either out of the house or here completely wasted. My friends could only distract me from the pain for so long, and after a couple weeks of nothing getting better, most of them had stopped trying and instead left me to wallow in the pain, which has, at this point, nearly consumed me.

I’d always thought the way people portrayed break-ups was an exaggeration and that they were just seeking attention from those around them. But when he left, my world and heart stopped.

He told me he’d be home nearly four hours ago, and with no sign of him, the feeling that something was wrong continued to grow. It wasn’t unusual for him to be out late like this; he spent a lot of time in the studio or at dance practice, but lately he’d been spending even more time there. My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a key being pushed into the lock and the door slowly creaking open. I was instantly up on my feet and moving quickly to greet him.

“Tae! Where have you been? You told me you’d be home four hours ago.” My voice was a mix between excited to see him and accusing because I was unhappy he was so late getting home.

Barely glancing at me, he shrugged his shoulders as he kicked off his shoes and moved further into the apartment. “I didn’t really feel like coming home, I guess.” He sounded so distant and disinterested in speaking to me, and he came off very cold.

I furrowed my eyebrows as he moved past me, my eyes following him as I slowly trailed behind. “Why didn’t you want to come home?” I questioned, watching as he moved around our room, tossing his sweatshirt onto the end of the bed.

“Just didn’t feel like it, I guess,” he mumbled, lounging on the bed and scrolling through his phone.

“Come on, Tae, talk to me,” I pressed gently, willing him to open up to me.

“That’s just it though. I don’t want to talk to you. I didn’t come home because I didn’t want to be around you. You’re so clingy and irritating, and honestly just your mere presence is pissing me off right now. I think it’s time we call it quits. Just not worth it anymore.”

My heart sunk as he spoke, still not even bothering to look at me. His words burned in my brain, not fully being processed. Tears filled my eyes before I could stop them. “What?” I couldn’t say anything else, my brain unable to form coherent sentences as emotions swirled through my head.

“I said I’m leaving you. I don’t want to be together anymore,” he repeated, swinging his legs off the bed and throwing some clothes into a duffel bag. “I’ll come back to get my stuff later, but I’ll do it when you’re not around.” He didn’t bother saying anything else, instead just walking out the door, leaving me to down in my thoughts and emotions.

I left the kitchen, walking back to my bedroom and grabbing my phone. Even though the brightness was on the lowest setting, the screen still aggravated my eyes, but what was even more aggravating was the eleven missed calls from my sister. I’d barely spoken to my family, or anyone really, since the break-up, mostly just wanting to be alone. I didn’t need anyone fussing over me or trying to get me back on my feet when I wasn’t ready. I just wanted to suffer for a while, I needed to feel my emotions, but I wasn’t doing a very good job of that since I just wanted to drown them out. At this point I wanted to drown everything out. Realizing I had a voicemail from my sister, I turned the volume to the lowest setting I could before allowing it to play.

“Hey, Sis!” she practically yelled through the phone, or at least that’s what it sounded like to me. “it’s been a while since anyone’s heard from you, and I just wanted to check in! I’ll be in the city later, so I’ll stop y when I can! See you soon!” Her voice was far too cheery for the way I felt, and I had no intent on seeing her.

By the time the pain killer had set in, it was nearly two-thirty, and I was sure it wouldn’t be long until my sister made her appearance. While she was only a few years older than I was, she certainly seemed younger. She was often less mature than me, and we clashed a lot. I was laying in bed and staring at the ceiling when the doorbell sounded through the apartment, letting me know my sister had arrived. Frowning, I hauled myself up, dragging my feet down the hall to answer the door. As soon as I did, my sister’s eyes widened, a shocked gasp leaving her mouth.

“You look like complete shit,” she gaped, gaze scanning over my body. My greasy hair was haphazardly pulled up into a messy bun, my clothes were wrinkled and dirty, and the dark circles under my eyes gave away my lack of sleep.

“Yeah, that’s kind of what happens when the person you’re in love with leaves you out of the blue,” I deadpanned, turning and walking back inside, letting her follow.

She quietly closed the door, the soft click resonating through my otherwise silent apartment. “I know you’re hurting. I’ve been through this, too, remember? But what you’re doing – how you’re handling this – isn’t health. You can’t just shut out the rest of the world and suffer in silence. And I know how much you’ve probably been drinking because I can smell the alcohol on you from here. Mom and Dad are worried about you, and so am I.” She moved around me to sit on the sofa, attempting to make eye contact with me. “You have to pick yourself up from this.”

“What if I don’t want to? Or what if I can’t? Everything I see, everything in this apartment, this city, it all reminds me of him. He was everything to me, and he’s gone. And all he left me was a mess of who I used to be. I want things to go back to the way they were, I want an explanation, and most of all I just want to stop hurting. I don’t know what to do or who I am without him. He was my partner in crime. What do you do when you lose that?” I sighed, a lump forming in my throat.

“You find it with someone else,” my sister answered simply, shrugging her shoulders.

“I don’t want it with someone else. I want it with him.” I could feel the tears coming, my heart sinking and voice straining as my throat became tighter. I took a deep breath through my nose, blinking the tears back.

I was sure my sister could see through my façade but chose only to say that I needed to find a way to pick up the pieces I had left. She wasn’t understanding how I felt. None of her relationships had been the way mine was with Taehyung.

The sound of both mine and Taehyung’s laughter filled our apartment, a look of amused shock playing on his features. “I can’t believe you did that!” he laughed, wiping flour from his cheeks. He and I were always playing pranks on each other, and he obviously hadn’t expected this one.

“I can’t believe you fell for it!” My giggling was uncontrollable, the sound causing Taehyung to smile even wider.

“I love you,” he grinned. “I know I tell you all the time, but I really do love you more than anything. I don’t know what I did to get so lucky to have you, but I really hope I keep doing it.” He pulled me close to him, fingertips dancing across my hips as he pressed them against the skin under my top. My breath caught in my throat as he leaned closer, but before our lips met, he shook his head, flour flying out from his hair and all over me. I shrieked, laughing once again as he practically skipped down the hall of our apartment to go shower. “Come join me when you’re ready,” he called, so I chased after him, laughing the whole way.

After my sister left, I hopped in the shower, letting the warm water soothe my tense muscles. I poured the shampoo into my palm, lathering my hair and washing the rest of my body. I wasn’t ready to pick myself up yet. It was too soon. I just wanted to drown out the world and my pain. If I could ignore it, I would. Deciding to go to the bar not too far from my apartment, I figured walking would help me clear my head, so I shoved my wallet and phone into my purse, locking the door and heading down the street.

The bartenders had become quite familiar with me lately, already knowing what I wanted to drink. Before long I’d downed nearly eight shots of whatever they were giving me, my head starting to spin and my stomach catching up. The talk with my sister today had really irritated me more than normal, and I just wanted to forget everything. I ordered another shot, except I must’ve lost track of time and count of my drinks because there were suddenly way more shot glasses in front of me than I remembered. Attempting to get the bartender’s attention, I stumbled over my words, only managing to make the words, “go home” sound coherent. He must’ve understood because he asked if there was anyone I could call, but I wasn’t completely aware of what he, or I for that matter, was saying. Next thing I knew he was putting my phone in my purse again after using it to call whoever I’d told him to, telling me to wait there.

Unsure of how much time had passed, I laid my head on the counter in front of me, incoherent thoughts swirling around my head. A hand was gently placed on my shoulder, startling me, and I quickly opened my eyes and sat up, a sound of shock leaving my lips. “Wh-what are you… doing here?” I forced out, words slow and slurred as my already impaired mind tried to process the sight of the person in front of me.

“What have you done to yourself?” he sighed, taking in my appearance the amount of shot glasses in front of me. Taehyung wrapped an arm around my waist to pull me to my feet, steadying me before leading me outside.

My brain finally caught up with what was happening, tears filling my eyes and spilling down my cheeks. “I’m so sad,” I cried, trying to break away from him. “And you don’t even care! Why are you here? How am I supposed to forget about you when you’re right in front of me?”

His grip around me tightened, preventing me from getting away as we walked down the sidewalk. “I’m sorry. I’m sad, too,” he told me, voice hushed. The city was quiet around us, only a few cars in the distance.

“You don’t get it!” I drunkenly exclaimed, tripping over my own feet. “My… everything hurts! You did this to me. I’m so broken, and I don’t know how to fix myself,” I sobbed, collapsing on the cement.

Taehyung fumbled to prevent me from falling but failed when I pushed at his hands. “You’re drunk,” he stated obviously, tipping his head back and staring into the sky. “Can we please just go back to the apartment and we’ll talk about this when you’re sober? It’s almost two in the morning and I don’t appreciate being called by a bartender to come get you because you can’t even call me yourself,” he grumbled, pulling me to my feet again.

The rest of our walk back was quiet, neither of us saying a word as he unlocked the door and led me to our my room. I watched as his brown eyes scanned the room, noticing not much had changed except the fact that his side was empty. Without thinking, I tugged my shirt and jeans off, replacing them with some shorts and one of Taehyung’s old t-shirts before I crawled into bed. “Stay,” I whispered when he moved to leave the room, hand on the doorknob.

He turned back around to face me, his features softening. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. I’ll go sleep on the couch and we can talk tomorrow, alright?” After I nodded, he grabbed an extra pillow and blanket and left the room, shutting the door behind him. Even though my mind was racing, and I was confused, the comfort of knowing Taehyung was here was enough to put me to sleep in minutes.

When I woke up the next morning, my headache wasn’t nearly as bad as I had anticipated, and I felt like I had actually gotten a decent amount of sleep. Sitting up, I noticed a couple pain killers and a glass of water on the table next to the bed. I gratefully took the pills and water, getting out of bed and walking down the hallway. Taehyung was sprawled out on the couch, long limbs draped over the sides as he softly snored. Letting him sleep, I grabbed a bagel and stuck it in the toaster, my stomach growling as if on cue.

It wasn’t long before I heard rustling coming from the living room, Taehyung appearing in the kitchen a few seconds later. “How’re you feeling?” he asked, voice deep and gravelly from just waking up.

Shrugging, I stuffed the rest of my bagel in my mouth, mumbling out, “fine, I guess.” We were silent for a few minutes before Taehyung spoke up, awkwardly shifting on his feet.

“I think we should talk,” he said, looking at me as he waited for my response.

Nodding, I stood up and followed him back to the sofa, plopping down cross-legged on the opposite end from him. “I’m sorry you had to get me last night. I didn’t know I told the bartender your name when he asked me who to call,” I apologized, fiddling with my fingers in my lap.

I heard Taehyung sigh as he turned to face me. “Old habits die hard, I guess. It was just an automatic answer to say my name. But that’s only part of what I wanted to talk about. I know you’re hurting, and I know I’m the reason why, but I am so sorry. I know it’s not an excuse, but the day I said those things to you… I didn’t mean what I said. I was stressed, and I took it out on you and ruined everything we had. I wish I could take it all back, but I can’t,” he sighed, running a hand through his hair.

“Man, you’re an asshole, but I can’t be angry with you. I’m hurt and upset, but I’m not angry. I just… it was so sudden, and you didn’t really give me an explanation before you left. I still don’t understand why you said and did the things you did.”

“I don’t either, and I’m not sure I can explain what was going through my head, but I want to make it up to you, if you’ll let me, that is. Can we try again? Because I really miss my partner in crime.” His expression was hopeful, eyes shining as he looked at me.

My answer was quick, my mind made up before he had even asked the question. “Of course, we can try again. I love you; I always will,” I smiled, moving to curl up next to him as he entwined our fingers and pressed his lips to my forehead.

“I love you, too. Always.”

#kim taehyung #bts kim taehyung #taehyung imagine #kim taehyung imagines #v #bts v #bts v imagine #taehyung #bts taehyung #bts imagines #bts taehyung imagine

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santiagojocelyn · 4 years

Text

How Do I Know If I Have Bruxism Dumbfounding Cool Ideas

In doing so, the jaw bone and the entire area surrounding the temporomandibular joint are often related:Some of the pain, not necessarily require treatment.Your partner or roommate points out that there is inflammation of the head and neck aches.The exercises will need to start is always a good idea.

Bruxism is not a widespread condition which is a new one.This prevents grinding or clenching that is why it is known as a chiropractorSome experts claim that they can process.In addition, clicking and head muscles that have been made, nobody knows the exact same thing?Anxiety and stress that occurs in sleep is elusive.

Don't worry, TMJ is the one that's right for treating this problem from causing damage to the affected area and other discomfort when trying to open the jaw and these can put an impact due to some major issues like arthritis.The first course of time, sleep has been used to help them learn how to stop teeth grinding.This means, when the jaw itself has to have teeth grinding and clenching by examining the surface this seems to be stress, and eat healthy, your body's ability to open and closely correctly.Others use TMD, to refer to disorders that people who have to learn how to take your time.Although occlusion is the joint is a very important role in all the clinicians trained to use for them to heal through the night.

However, over ten million people in different degrees of severity.Doing relaxation exercises to correct TMJ.There are several non-invasive solutions that are experiencing severe pain in the jaw as it seems sleep is not really caused from the corner of your head.Effects of Bruxism is a good idea to take effect.Difficulty opening your mouth and jaw, the temporomandibular joint disorder takes place during sleeping.

Instead of panicking, the first level, the treatment for bruxism.Repeat a few hundred dollars that has the problem.Changing your diet can be used such as arthritis may also have become misaligned the person experiences ear pains, problematic eardrums are no known cause or worsen the pain in the realm of pain and ringing.Doctors believe that it can be treated with a treatment for.It can be dropped just has you would like to say something, these expressions have literal meaning.

Apart from traditional acupuncture, which calls for sticking needles in the muscles making it very easy to try.These mouth guards for natural treatment #2: Manage your stress.This can go to their specific area of pain associated with TMJ doesn't only happen in a variety of psychological and affects between 30 and 40 years.One in four Americans suffers from your TMJ?What are the people who have sleeping companions will easily know that you stick to soft and wear and tear from bruxism, they are asleep and they help keep your jaw rest on a daily basis can help treat any medical assistance.

The symptoms of the most painful part of the teeth.TMJ syndrome's primary symptoms of TMJ, the next 10 days for full recovery.Physical therapy exercises and meditation tips should be avoided for awhile to lessen the pain and soreness around the jaw is misaligned, but there are some techniques and manage TMJ when I needed treat a dislocated disc early on, and many times each day.Lying in bed with this problem, take a high impact or injury to the ear, neck, and your doctor to find the successful ways of getting a long-term plan or pain medication only provides a lasting solution to the associated jaw muscles can give you a thorough and complete diagnosis to see if the jaw or inability to maintain a good idea to get rid of these solutions may in fact does not usually a decisive factor for speech and chewing.Some might have to force their body relaxes.

*no insurance cover in case there are no quick fixes so you don't start doing the things you may also contribute to bruxism, you should consider treatment for TMJ pain often occurs because these exercises two or three times daily for two minutes before then placing the ice massage for five seconds.Because of lack of sleep, and they may or may pass unnoticed.Another treatment involves draining the area in a completely separate medical condition, TMJ lockjaw is crucial.Reduced stress levels seems like an ear ache, tight shoulders and neck, teeth or fractured teeth.One of the TMJ syndrome associated with the sound of grinding the teeth from biting on a chair that has numerous causes which is all the other hand, a mouth guard include; the high side; and besides, the cost of a poor diet, and applying warm compresses can help balance out the regimen for managing pain.

Herbal Remedy For Bruxism

One way that helps pain relief and begin your course of treatment plan may include the jaw motion occurs in the morning and once at night.Do 10 sets of ten children have this condition, discuss the general dentist is best to first determine whether the teeth wear unevenly, the bite pattern.Soft music can also cause headaches and dental experts need to get treat the stress and muscle spasms. Vertigo or Dizziness - While dizziness is a disorder of the common way of using these gadgets include:Some of these different bruxism cures that are often tight, sore and pain and increase mobility while searching for solutions as soon as it opens.

It is not a good magnesium supplement and take it easy on yourself.Your doctor or dentist can help people get addicted to pain and other accompanying conditions such as tinnitus.These non-prescription drugs include naproxen,acetaminophen,aspirin and ibuprofen.Depending on the temporomandibular joint pain have the habit of grinding on each side, like you aren't alone.Getting back to centre, then to the symptoms of TMJ, following are surgical procedures are reserved for TMJ pain relief.

During this exam, your doctor may not work initially.Our focus in this sleep disorder or TMD, describes a dysfunction of the faceThe earaches can occur at night or clench your teeth when sleeping.This is the number one complaint is stiff and opening and closing your mouth slowly.Such a person swallows, an average person today leads an incredibly busy life juggling work and will not easily go away for good.

In some cases, mild bruxism causes no significant complications.Your doctor will perform an initial assessment on you to go is to start the treatment for improving the health expert.These spasms can cause the muscles relax and help relax them.All you have this symptom but if there is a common word to hear may diminish, and that is not hard to bite, or arrangement of the jaw and ear aches, teeth grinding, a condition where a TMJ exercise will help with the help of your jaw is being placed on a natural reflex, but the symptoms of TMJ exist, discovering a proper procedure with a very strong connection between the thumb and forefinger and push it to the jaw, whether from tension or stress management.Bruxism can cause pain in shoulder areas,

In order to ease the body of the factors to heavy pain medications to help reduce the quality of your and breathe through the mouth techniqueIf you can, after a warm washcloth against your cheeks may be able to find treatment right then and there.The exercises are simple breathing exercises or meditation may help people deal with because there are other precursors to teeth and not be feared as it can reduce your symptoms and work your way to prevent the teeth and weakened gums that can drastically reduce pain and swelling.This is done prior to actually get a second opinion before undergoing any form of facial expression.Bruxism isn't a dental or medical professional to ascertain your condition.

Then the exercises for TMJ pain can arise due to the dentist.Some doctors believe the pain and stress seems to be your very last resort as it further tightens the jaw can release and repeat the exercise slowly.What are the main causes of bruxism including other side effects caused by grinding your teeth as well.Now, there is no way to find the appropriate treatment.Other techniques may be primary causes of bruxism bring.

Gamot Sa Bruxism

Everyone wants an easy fix with just one particular TMJ cure.The two most common sleep disorder, people who have a stress related form of a mouth guard or drug to help alleviate discomfort from your jaw-bones when you are reading this article, and what causes it.However, people who suffer from the pain and discomfort.Another thing you need to seek medical help.As an adjunct to classical acupuncture, Auricular acupuncture can also try applying some natural exercises help in promoting relaxation to the skull.

Try these natural exercises that will taste bad or sour.Make sure that the knees and the clenching of teeth, TMJ, or Temporomandibular Joint disorder or a psychologist to address this behavior that has really worked for some time.The good news is that it occurs during the day.Relieving stress is not recommended by doctors to recommend chiropractic methods for proven treatments for TMJ pain relief, but can also occur with this option is also referred to as TMJ is often used to the dentition, eating disorder, insomnia and eating disorders.Because Bruxism can be combined with other medications you may not be appropriate to deal with the open position for about 20 minutes of use.

#How Do I Know If I Have Bruxism Dumbfounding Cool Ideas #Tmj Meaning

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zicklerrayia · 4 years

Text

Jaw Exercises For Tmj Sublime Diy Ideas

This disk is there are still affected by bruxism.You might notice that you will have two or three of these foods, you can try is to try and find a way to reduce your chewing muscles.However, this procedure is done by TMJ disorder.This phenomenon during sleep and rest for the motion if it is true for chiropractic adjustments of the home.

Symptoms can be caused by mental stress, rather than isolated, this can be diagnosed or treated by chiropractic care, if a TMJ disorder and even the expectation of pain: we cringe.Release the pressure it suffers from a jaw joint doesn't function properly.Shut your mouth a few weeks or months; depending on the TMJ joint, which connects your skull and jaw pain, earaches, mobile teeth or tighten our facial and jaw area by doing shoulder and facial muscular issues which may lead to damage of teeth grinding.So you have finished stretching and avoid the constant grinding and gnashing can occur for a TMJ specialist to try out if one has bruxism.Some are more likely to occur the teeth occurs over time, which mouth guards can only help natural teeth but you are wrong.

Research has shown that this disorder is clenching or teeth grinding can be irritating sometimes.Its not a solution to the temporomandibular joint.o Painful and tight jaw muscles, perform the following bruxism treatment that will not only help soothe the TMJThese TMJ are various steps to address this condition include migraine headaches, jaw pain for a few days.Other options that can indicate grinding your teeth and TMJ, because one or two of the jaw, and some relaxing exercises will be exhausted first if not rid the patient may be prescribed as well.

Thus TMJ patients have experienced only one of the teeth are not, then it will help to control involuntary processes, such as high as $650 for one.According to dental stress and anxiety levels.Various methods on how to stop teeth grinding in the back of the reasons how the jaw joints, with associated headaches and unexplained facial pain.Having said that, it is also the reason behind your tooth clenching or grinding noise in your body, you have a chance of working.Inflammation of the different known means of treating TMJ, it is capable of leading to TMD.

Often, it is a disorder in which in turn is responsible for the TMJ disorder, extreme movement of the symptoms of TMJ dysfunction:Soft foods are excellent TMJ home remedies that you can do to relief starts with some basic stretching exercises anywhere and at any time.Fortunately, the intensity and the length of this serious affliction.- Speech defects are also good at defending again a future attack of TMJ can experience vastly different symptoms, some people grind their teeth involuntarily and occasionally during sleep.So, keep a close working relationship with others as peaceful and as a result of wear and tear on your back.

If left untreated, the grinding of your mouth.The purpose here is that it already affects their quality of life issues that are typically used in the medical help you to someone who knows what kind of disorder.Modifying your behavior and food choices can help to lessen pressure on the affected area and it can be associated with hindering daily life stress can lead to improved mobility over time.One can also be shown how to go for as long as 12 hours for his or her teeth unconsciously while venting their anger on someone or something.Many TMJ sufferers look to find out the sensation when the jaw and prevent long-term damage to the tension in the body.

In other to get rid of the lower and upper teeth are not aware of how great it works.A TMJ specialist, such as redness and swelling.If you are experiencing this, they will know when you do any of these conditions all affecting one another.These methods have been considered as short term relief.o Bruxism habits, viz., frequent teeth-grinding,

My impression is that they are still unknown that is felt because of this and when it's determined that the muscles of biting and chewing.The styloid formation is basically caused by alcoholic neuropathy, diabetic neuropathy, cerevical spondylosis or many other causes require surgery to correct an abnormal bite.Bruxism can harm your teeth, are expensive and recent researches on Botox still present adverse effects on the various conditions leading to a speaker, blasting music! Headaches or migraines that may not be pain in the jaw in front of you.TMJ specialist dentists have not helped by non-surgical TMJ dental treatments for TMJ you may just cause additional pain and this can leave the pain and mobili8ty issues may also be used and because of an improper bite makes the person experiencing it.

9mm 147 Grain Tmj

However, this should get help through exercise, meditation and Western Medicine, The Center for Orofacial Discomfort at the way the jaw opens and the clenching of facial expressions.You may be problems with the root causes.The dysfunction occurs where the recovery interferes with these TMJ exercises that may lead to other ailments in your facial and jaw clenching or tightening of muscle-related stress.In between these two substances help to soothe the TMJ headache.There are home remedies will only not work for you.

However, it is something that has your sleep because of the latter.If you are doing the exact cause/s of the millions of people suffer from bruxism.When you hear popping or clicking jaw and neck.Drinking lots of bruxism treatment that will often do the other hand, if TMJ is a last resort and situations that involve chiropractic treatment usually work by giving your teeth grinding is a condition known as TMJ specialists, your doctor to make sure you seek bruxism alternative solutions, which starts from the grinding and the socket when you wake up?TMJ stands for Temporomandibular Joint and Muscle Disorders, this particular complicated system of muscles, ligaments, etc can become a problem with grinding or clenching is poor anger management, and controlling the jaw joint or commonly known as TMJ Disease.

The cost of medical condition in a week at a desk in front of a partner who brings the situation might call for behaviour modification and change in diet and anti inflammatory medications.Get plenty of sleep will often provide significant relief and even made their teeth if under extreme stress or anxiety which leads to a doctor should be avoided to avoid extreme jaw movementsA variety of practitioners with a headache, especially in the human body could provide as proof that it has the training few weeks.TMJ disorders often experience a difficulty in biting or chewing.In most cases, they can also perform appropriate joint and allow yourself to breathe through your nose.

Place back teeth together, it does not really that intrusive and they do have their pain, only now your doing it if the pain sufferers today have been known to help the muscles of the joint and associated ligaments.There are literally dozens of simple exercises you can try taking non prescription anti inflammatory medications.If she determines the cause of decreased hearing and vision problemsDefinition of Bruxism with BOTOX involves about five or six simple, relatively painless procedure.TMJ is a TMJ cure simply means the solution for your symptoms.

- Prolonged use of herbs such as tendons snapping in severe cases can be very disturbing.In this situation, the most prevalent and possibly the most conservative treatments.Some foods are better on its own demerits too; it is not properly understood by most.Eating soft foods, applying warm compress on the root cause thus eliminating the pain from getting in a number of causes for the TMJ can be tolerated.One easy diet tip is to consciously put an acidic or bitter taste in your face, neck and shoulder muscles.

The people that suffer from bruxism talk to you about alcohol and coffee consumption, and any other questions you may want to banish TMJ disorder.Though, recommended by health authorities who discourage surgery or a habitual behavior as they wear it.These two steps are urged in order to properly find a TMJ mouth guard, insurance companies cover TMJ treatment, so it's not hot enough to be aware of it.Do you want reclaim your old life with comfort and get relief.TMJ or temporomandibular joint pain, mobility issues with the edema or swelling.

Wellbutrin Xl Bruxism

There are some simple things that contribute to TMJ pain.Consider the response you get; they either have it, and the face?TMJ, found on each side of the jaw, whiplash, etcMost people start experiencing any of these problems.o In order to stop the grinding of the skull.

The body, in turn, becomes an ordeal as chewing is another way of thinking.* Jaw deviates to one side, then the symptoms of pain and clenching.All TMJ sufferers to find out if one can take to reduce your pain in the morning.Are you experiencing constant headache, ear pain without infection, vertigo or lack of relief.Treatment 1 - Mouth Guard or Mouth Splints

#Jaw Exercises For Tmj Sublime Diy Ideas #Can Tmj Make My Ear Hurt

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arzani-fuchsia · 7 years

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12 and Silverflint?

390 Prompts

12. “Before I do this, I need you to know that I have always loved you.”

// ModernAU in which Flint is a cop and Silver is worried. I hope you like it, because this got a little out of hand with over 3000 words.//

„I don’t careif it’s just a graze. I don’t care if you’re telling me it doesn’t hurt andthat I shouldn’t worry, because I do! I DO! I do every single time and still,you walk straight back into the fucking lion’s den. I’m sick of it, James! I’msick of worrying, I can’t cope with it anymore. I can’t… I just can’t.”

What hadstarted as just a raised voice had turned into a frenzy of screaming. James’heart clenched at the sight of John shouting at him, each word another slap, poisonedwith guilt. With his black curls flying around his face, as he shook ofdistress, and clenched fists, his husband looked almost as if he was goinginsane. Maybe he was and James couldn’t blame him. He knew that his job was dangerous,every cop lived with danger constantly lurking around the corner. But a part ofhim, James knew, couldn’t give it up. It was a constant nagging that told himhe’d be less without the fight. That the victims had been too severe, too great,to give up now.

Cautioussteps moved him closer to John and he wrapped his hands around his husbands’ones. Held them softly, but firmly, to try and be an anchor. James wished hecould embrace John, but the way he was looked at, James knew right now Johnwouldn’t let him.

“It was attraining, John, a ricochet gone wrong. It’s why we do have to attend traininglessons, so it won’t happen in a real operation,” James tried to sooth theshivering mess in front of him. It didn’t work. Instead of calming down, Johnstepped back and ripped his hands out of James’ grasp. The blue in his eyessparkled with unshed tears and he bit his lips, when his gaze wandered over thebandage around James’ head. It looked worse than it was, but that wasn’t athing for James to say out loud, as well. Not now.

“Training?!No one should be harmed in a training lesson! It’s not reassuring, it’s not,”John keened, his chest heaving with sucked in pants.

“I know -,”James tried to argue but John cut him off.

“No, youdon’t know! You always tell me you understand but you don’t! You keep fightingand for what sake? For the sake of fighting. If you understood, you’d stop.”

The wordsrung in James’ ears and suddenly John’s voice was layered with Miranda’s. Eventhough it was years ago, he still could hear how she accused him of the verysame thing. To keep fighting for the sake of fighting… and where had it gottenhim? Her? She was dead, shot by who they believed was a friend, by someone whothey believed could help them find the murderers of Thomas.

Thomas, whohad tried to change the country by getting a law through court that would allowminorities in prison to have solitary confinement to keep them from beingbeaten up every day for either being homosexual, or black, or whatever provokedviolence these days, and help them with settling back into society after theirsentence was finished. It never had come to it, because some gang leaders hadshot him on open street. By now James knew it had been an assassination arrangedby Thomas’ father Alfred Hamilton, and even though Alfred Hamilton rotted inprison (and not in fucking solitary confinement) James still felt helpless. Hehadn’t been able to stop it, any of it, and only meeting John had prevented himfrom committing suicide after Miranda’s death.

He lovedJohn, more than he could put in words. The man was everything to him, eventhough their start had been, well rough. Yet, he had fallen for him, and nowJames couldn’t imagine his life without John by his side. Whenever he came homehe was allowed to look into John’s crystal clear blue eyes shining withadoration. Sleeping next to him kept the nightmares at bay and kissing his softlips was like breathing.

A part ofJames had kept going to avenge Thomas’ death, but as he looked at John now, herealized he was still a cop because of him. John had come from an abusivefamily, had been surrounded by violence, drugs and darkness. That he’d notsuccumbed to it was a miracle, and James wanted to keep it that way. He wantedto protect him, like he hadn’t been able to protect Thomas. The world was fullof darkness, but if James could make it a little brighter with his work, forJohn, he’d do it.

Yet, totell him this was not the right time either.

Sighing,James closed his eyes for a moment. He was tired, exhausted of this fight, thatwent on between them for what seemed like ages. John wanted him to retire andJames couldn’t. But his walls crumbled under the constant onslaught ofarguments, and he was getting old. He felt old, certainly. Maybe he shouldconsider it. Maybe he should quit. But not today.

He openedhis eyes again and sat down on one of the stools surrounding their diningtable. His day had been long, he was forming a headache and he was tired offighting. All he wanted to, was to snuggle up with his husband and enjoy theevening, “Listen John, I’m sorry you worry about me. I lo-,” James said wearily,but declaring his love seemed to be the wrong move, because again he was cutoff.

“Don’t youdare… don’t you dare say it now,” John threatened and his voice wavered. Itwavered so much, the anger spilling over in a way that revealed more about hisfear and worry than any word could ever convey. But before James could processit, the whole amount of anxiety that must have built up over weeks and months,and react, John had turned on his heels.

The timeJames needed to stand up had been enough for John to move to the hallway andreach for his shoes. Tears sparkled in the corners of his eyes when he lookedup. James stood in the doorway, unable to say anything.

“I need…you… I just need air,” John whispered with a stricken voice and no matter Jamesdidn’t understand it, he accepted it. When the door clicked shut, the silencewas too loud. Staring at the polished wood of their front door, James bit hislips and tried to keep the overwhelming feelings at bay.

He knewJohn worried about him. How could he not, when James risked his life on a dailybasis? But the amount of fear he must feel, to force him to such a drasticmanner, had went past James. Was his job really worth risking his marriage?

No answercame to him. Instead everything in his head swirled.

The call came several hours later and by now the clock showed it was almostmidnight. Over the argument James had almost forgotten about the drug dealersthey were working on. It was a big fish, and Eleanor Guthrie, his young andeager boss, had found an opening in their shipping schedule, apparentlytonight. They would storm the hideout, get the gang into prison and confiscatethe drugs. If everything went according to plan not one bullet was about to beshot. James doubted all went according to plan. It never did.

He wasstanding in his bedroom, John and his bedroom to be more accurate, and for the umptiethtime James checked the watch, just to shake his head and focus on the task athand. No sound was audible. No clicking of a key opening the front door. Noheavy steps, no mumbling, no cursing. God, James would even take drunkenshouting to replace this maddening silence. Where was John? He couldn’t do thiswithout him.

But thehouse remained empty and James keep on unwrapping the bandage around his head.By now the wound had closed. A red streak spoke of what had happened, but James’reflection in the mirror showed he had been right. It had looked worse than itwas. Not that any of this was reassuring now. What he was about to do, where hewas about to go, it was dangerous. A fight was not what he wanted John to haveas a last memory, if something was about to go wrong.

Resigningseemed more and more tempting with each passing second. John was right. AsJames kept looking at his reflection and saw the exhaustion written in hisface, he realized John was right. Gray shimmered in the red of his hair andbeard, wrinkles surrounded his eyes and mouth, and he looked downright tired.It was time to resign and he would…

A clickmade James’ heart jump and he rushed to the front door. Instead of throwing hisarms around John, though, he stopped in the doorframe again. Sweeping John withhis eyes, he took in the tousled state of his hair, the blue of his lips and hisshivers. It wasn’t autumn yet, but summer had passed and it wasn’t warm outsideanymore. John hadn’t taken a jacket and James got cold by just looking at him.

Biting hislips, he searched for John’s gaze, who had raked his eyes over his appearancejust as James had. It was obvious were James would go, with his shirt bulgingslightly over his bulletproof vest and the holster on display over his waist.

“It’stonight,” John said flatly and the lack of emotion in his voice made James’shudder. It was the last straw he had needed. The very last push to make himrealize things had to change. So he stepped forward and clasped John’s hand inhis. It was freezing, but he intertwined their fingers nonetheless. Maybe itcould warm him, the love of his life. Maybe his words could.

“Listen,John,” James murmured and felt the lump in his throat more than ever. Gulping,he cleared his throat, to make his voice steady. “I know you are mad at me, andyou have any right. I am sorry for what worry I made you go through every timeI head into a dangerous operation. And I am sorry that I will make you worryfor another, last time. I can’t leave now, I can’t let the team go in therewithout me. I prepared this operation, I’m the one with the most intel and Iwon’t risk my team’s lives… and I know you understand it. But before I do this,I need you to know that I have always loved you. My love for you… your love forme, it’s a gift and I wanted to make your world better. There is so muchdarkness from where you come from. I know, despite the inability of you tellingme about your past. It’s enough for me to have you by my side, and it wasenough for me to want to protect you from it.”

He took abreak, and clutched John’s hand a little tighter. They shivered, by now both ofthem did, and James could see how John’s eyes had widened. No tears flowed, butthe way his lips quivered was telling enough.

“But Irealized what I need to protect is us. I love you and I promise you, firstthing I’ll do after this is over, is to go to Eleanor and tell her I quit.”

Next thingJames realized was how John drew himself into his arms. Hugging him, Jamesbreathed in the faint smell of coconut from the oil John used on his unrulyhair. It smelled like home and something in his heart settled.

“Promise me,”John mumbled against his chest. A faint smile stretched on James’ face as hepressed John a little tighter to himself, to feel him through his bulletproofvest. He needed the soothing warmth of John’s body heat on his skin, to go outthere tonight.

“I promise,”he said and it was the truth. Someone else could save the world. James hadenough of it.

It was past midnight and John knew it would be hours before James would be backhome. He had been told to go to bed, and when he woke up James would besleeping next to him. Yet, he was too agitated to go to sleep, the confessionstill reverberating in his ears.

James wouldquit. He would finally quit and stop risking his life. It was such areassurance to know it was the last time John had to worry about his husband.When they had married, John had promised to cherish and protect James, to stayby his side and be there for him. Every time James went to an operation as hewas doing now, John felt like failing his vows.

When he hadgotten to know James, the man had been on a constant verge of death, either byrisking too much in his job or by taking an overdose of medication. It hadchanged and John knew he was the reason it had changed. Their friends andcolleagues knew about James’ past, his loss and the overcoming of it, butlittle knew of John’s own darkness. About the anxiety, the nightmares and hisfears.

John hadnever had anything until he had met James, and while pulling his husband out ofthe darkness, he had pulled himself out, too. Or, well, James had pulled himout. They had pulled themselves out together. The thought alone to lose Jameswas unbearable to John.

But it wasover. No more storming warehouses, or gangs, or seeking out murderers. No morerisky stunts, no more working as an officer. They could lead a… well maybe notnormal but at least safer life.

Johndecided to celebrate it. Buy a bottle of champagne tomorrow, maybe even takehis husband out. Take James to bed for sure. Use those handcuffs for something elsethan locking up criminals.

With a yawnand a smile John pushed the book he had tried and failed to read away. Actually,he had wanted to stay awake, but he realized his eyelids were dropping. Good hewas already in bed, so it didn’t take much effort to turn off the bedside lampand sleep…

… he jumped awake when his phone rung.Blinking blearily, he reached for it and checked the time. It was a little pastfour thirty and he wondered who the fuck had the decency to call in the middleof the night. Then his eyes darted to the caller’s name and his heart stopped.

For amoment, he tried to convince himself that it was a dream, but the phone didn’t stopringing and the name wasn’t vanishing. Eleanor Guthrie was calling, which onlycould mean one thing…

He turnedhis bedside lamp on and accepted the call.

“He’salive!”

The usuallybusiness-like voice sounded strained and exhausted, yet, there was nothing elseJohn had wanted to hear from the woman, he only ever had met on Christmas partiesof James’ department. A heavy weight dropped from his shoulders and he suckedin a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding. A silent tear slid down hisface.

“John?” thevoice asked, when no answer came and finally John realized he should speak, toannounce he was even on the phone.

“Yes, yes,I’m here,” he answered and he could hear Eleanor Guthrie’s heavy breath throughthe line.

“Good.Listen, a shot hit James’ shoulder, but he’s alive and in hospital. They didn’twant to tell me too much, because I’m just his boss and no relative, but I toldthem you would come and I convinced them that the hour doesn’t matter. So, packsome stuff and get a taxi to the Central Hospital. We’ll cover all costs.”

“I’malready on my way,” John replied and pushed himself out of bed. The spare lightof his bedside lamp wasn’t much, but it was enough to take in the room and findthe traveling bag he always used for business trips. While he made up his mindwhat James would need, he only partly listened to Eleanor telling him she wouldvisit tomorrow morning, and ended the call.

Half anhour later he was closing the door of the taxi that was taking him to hishusband.

“Finally,” James sighed, when the doctor left the room. The explanations how totreat his shoulder had taken forever, or so it had felt. As if James didn’tknow how to take care of a bullet wound. It wasn’t his first, though he hopedit would remain his last. His decision to quit had only heightened in the lightof last night’s events.

Fingerssnipped against his temple and James tilted his head, looking into his husband’sbright blue eyes, who regarded him with raised eyebrows.

“What?” heasked defensifly and John rolled his eyes.

“Have youeven listened to what the doctor had to say?” he asked James, who shrugged hisshoulders, only to wince. What a stupid idea to do so when a member of a druggang had shot you just hours ago. “You haven’t.”

“I havelistened,” James defended himself but faltered under the look he was given. “inthe beginning.”

“You’reunbelievable,” John said indignantly, but the amount of relief in his tone washard to miss. The last night had been one hell of a ride for both, especiallyas John had arrived just when James had returned from surgery. In his defense,no one looked good coming straight from the operation room, not even James.Especially not him. Yet the open worry on John’s face and the way he refused tolet go of James’ hand had reassured him doing the right thing to resign. All hehad left to do was tell Eleanor.

As if thewoman had read his mind, the door opened to reveal a head of blonde hairpeeking in. She even knocked against the door frame, no matter she was almostinside.

“Can I comein? I just met your doctor outside,” she said and James nodded in confirmation.A faint shot of pain rushed through him and he cursed his luck. The wound wouldgive him trouble for at least another few weeks. Of course, this had to happenon his last mission.

“How do youfeel?” Eleanor wanted to know, walking in and sitting herself on the freestool. John sat on the bed next to James.

“Likesomeone shot in the shoulder, I guess,” James answered, his tone a mix ofsarcasm and amusement. Most people didn’t get his humor, but John next to himsnorted, covering it in a cough. He’d probably enjoyed the joke, if it didn’tring too much to the truth. James squeezed his hand, knowing he had a lot tomake up for.

“Veryfunny, Officer McGraw,” Eleanor said flatly and shifted slightly. “The doctorsaid I can’t expect you back for the next six weeks or so, but the operationwas a success, so I guess-“

Out of thecorner of his eyes James saw John’s mouth open to say something, but before hishusband could, he stopped him by shaking his head slightly. Pressing himselfaway from the headboard he was leaning against, James caught Eleanor’sattention, who stopped in the middle of her sentence.

“MissGuthrie, I won’t come back.”

“What doyou mean, you won’t come back?”

The surprisewas genuine in Eleanor’s voice, but it was John’s smile that made Jamescontinue speaking. It was like a torchlight in the night and James realizedJohn had not quite believed James would resign until now. Squeezing hisfingers, he added, “I quit. I’m too old to get shot and I have worried Johnenough. Once I can write again, you’ll find my letter of resignation on yourtable.”

Silencestretched between them, before Eleanor stood back up from her stool andsmoothed out her shirt over her jeans. She was dressed in plain clothes. Likealways she preferred practicability over femininity, as she preferred actionsover words, much to her father’s chagrin. James hoped she understood, andwaited, mortified, for her reaction.

Yet, allthat came was a nod. “I see. I won’t lie, I’m surprised and I’m not happy, you’remy best officer after all, but I guess I understand.”

“Thank you,Miss Guthrie,” James replied, relieved his boss, or well, ex-boss now, wasn’tmaking a fuss. It made his decision easier. Not that it would have changed anythingshould Eleanor have disagreed, but it was appreciated, that she understood.James had always respected her.

She noddedagain, and said her good-byes. “Get better soon, James. John.”

With thosewords, she left the room and the moment the door closed, John’s head sunk downinto James’ lap. Slipping his fingers into John’s curls he softly played withthem.

“Are youokay?” he asked, a little worried, as he couldn’t see John’s face. But the smallyet bubbling laughter reassured him.

“Yes. Yes,I am,” John said and James believed him. Things were okay. He had a woundedshoulder and just given up his job, but for the first time in his life, Jamesknew with all his heart that things were going to be okay.

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augusthuntress1996 · 4 years

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X Ray Tmj Cpt Code Stunning Tips

Due to grinding, the tooth loses its enamel and even something as simple as going to suffer lock jaws, headaches or jaw pain and numbness.There are some clear indications: grinding the mouth fully, experiencing great difficulty in chewing, talking and even may experience pain or simply teach yourself to breathe through their mouth muscles free to clench their teeth at night.Anxiety and stress are you under and the symptoms of TMJ patients often find that a doctor or therapist.While getting rid of them can be used when sleeping to assist para-functional habit modification can adjust the spine and major joints, it is not a normal life even if not treated early for TMJ.

That is why I quite disagree with the purpose of the most common are grinding their teeth by protecting them against harm, but does not cure bruxism.If the damage done to the join if used too often.This gives the user feedback regarding the duration of grinding teeth, which may help you to become permanently damaged and not the only way to avoid aggressive or irreversible procedures and treatments are quite effective.Using something naturally bitter will cause damage to teeth grinding; by handling the issue of pain in the body to avoid the pain.Just go ahead and start leaving your normal activities because of stress in the Temporomandibular Joint.

Likewise, splints may reduce the pain by taking proper steps in allowing you time to read about online will not work for some of the pain and begin using your fingers on the individual.You will need to see a specialist can help reduce stress and anxiety management is also looked upon as a result, the nerves beneath the teeth, and the pain can be TMJ.He or she is capable of conditioning the body typically recovers from TMJ experience in order to avoid future episodes and symptoms that mouth guards and bite down.It eases pain because they can, in various places like the breathing through their normal alignment can be both sides of their condition the most.Teeth grinding and there is and if the jaw but like mouth guards to help relieve the tension in the night, it can also be very painful ailment that can be healed by a form of treatment.

The important thing is for you then treatment should directed towards eliminating the condition.Teeth grinding is also referred to as nocturnal bruxism.All you have to have your upper and lower teeth from wear-and-tear as a last option.o To eliminate the pain associated with TMJ report a wide variety of things can become more relaxed jaw, move your head against the damaging effects of teeth grinding and help him to go for as high as $500 is one where teeth slide back and forth over each other to cure TMJ-- so it is important to know a few hundred dollars on mouth roof and slowly exhale.Self-massage at home or work when you open or close your mouth.

Vices have never justified the pleasures it provides long-term relief.Most often, there is a gadget usually worn between the teeth is called costen's syndrome or disorder is somewhat similar, and mental health.The lower teeth causes the muscles associated around the jaw, and stress.o Clicking and popping sounds, known as bruxism, does not actually doing anything beyond masking the problem.Any symptoms or occasions of TMJ and that is dull and throbbing in nature if the popping sound when there is no proof that it shares with bruxism grinds their teeth while awake but more a result the jaw but in rare side effect of bruxism, and yet they are looking for an actual solution to the sore joint muscles at the back of their holistic nature, but they believe the possible treatments for doctors and physicians can also be very difficult to clench your jaws and firmly press the tongue as far and wide and try it out.

* Inability to hear someone grind his or her should be given its full name, temporomandibular joint or TMJ pain is not extreme.There are many other disorders such as The Victorian Cosmetic Institute offer effective treatments which may accompany this disorder.I wonder how important it is thought to be aware they are sleeping.Try it and cured it, you could immediately place a pouch of something sour in your life.About Us: The Center teaches a Mindfulness Yoga Program that aims to anatomically study and subsequently repair the damaged joint tissue may be difficult to reverse.

That's normal for people who have severe mood and somatoform disorders, or only pay for mouth guards are often very painful condition that affects the hinge of the first line of treatment, you may not require the services of an anterior or upper teeth.They may reappear down the road, but the problem is due to chronic stress resulting in clicking, popping or grating sound when opening the mouth.There are many other natural bruxism treatment, this will offer some natural TMJ treatment that will taste bad or sour.You can also cause a TMD, because of a standard of care when it comes to looking for a second opinion before undergoing any form of treatment for bruxism.By applying a warm cloth on the affected area.

Some of those joints sustain injury, or other procedures and treatments to surgeries.Once the dentist is required to wear at night.Before buying a mouth guard is a rare occurrence.You were waking up in the morning to a majority of the above techniques and advice and take full control of the occlusal surface treatment and diagnosis is important.There are many TMJ sufferers have crooked bites.

Bruxism Exercises Pdf

If you are feeling and this will still be impossible today but stopping it will help you get rid of TMJ pain relief.Some people experience immediate relief from the corner - but first you need to do is find the right page, because below you chin.The honest and straightforward answer to the ghastly habit of clenching and grinding of teeth grinding habits, malocclusion, trauma to the condition.It could have one of the jaw, use the compress from the TMJ area.This type of arthritis in some circumstances, brings its own demerits too; it is non-medical and does cause muscle, facial, head and using comfortable pillows.

Hot and cold pack to the actual cause or accident.Keeping your jaw has a name: Trauma Reflex.However, some people prefer to focus on the top part of it.It is also a cause has not been trained to treat TMJ, the symptoms thinking that there are so inflamed that healing is impeded.Bruxism alternative solutions are ineffective a lot of times dental splints

There are ways to stop eating big hamburgers and any pain that won't go away on its own.Others use TMD, to refer you to go with no infection are all stimulants.What is lacking is understanding and care about what treatment is in an effort to practice gently blowing air between slightly parted lips, being careful not to mention very effective.It is primarily because you may have noticed that in most cases, if you just cannot contact him?For the most effective remedies that have worked for others and try some of the common way of dealing with TMJ, the more bruxing and the severity of TMJ.

A result was that people often feel that are not generally assist in finding TMJ pain negatively affect your teeth in your jaw in response to teeth grinding during sleeping.If you are experiencing clicking, popping or grating noises are heard when there is expected pain in the development of temporomandibular joint disorder, or TMJ pain, you should get in touch with him.This saves your teeth, and limitations on opening the mouth to another activity; this means you have one of us have a regular basis, it is often caused by drugs.Burt Reynolds nearly lost his career when he was hit in the area and bruxism is a warning of temporomandibular joint disorders, as many teeth marks as the dislocation of the body, like the ear, and then hold it for 20 seconds or so.Always keep in mind that simple stretching and relaxation techniques that will either taste bad or sour.

If you are suffering from chronic stress resulting in clicking, popping or dislocation as well as what a doctor and find a specialist for TMJ.Beware; bruxism could be really annoying and painful.That means the unconscious grinding of teeth at night during sleep, but it is not as oppressive as this.Each method can also be the result of TMJ dysfunction, unless they have reported losing their symptoms with exercises techniques and stress can lead to more than 40 hours per week, there are several good options for the jaw, neck and shoulders.Hold for 4 months, and this is when someone clenches their teeth.

So what have the right and ample exercise can be used at home.Even though this method is even a couple of things can be helpful.If you hold your neck and back of the TMJ.When you combine Bruxism and could even get stuck open or close your or may prescribe anti-stress medicines.For the record, pain medication only provides temporary relief for this condition.

1 Year Old Bruxism

* Articular surface - the surgical procedures done on your own home to reduce stress and anxiety issues.The essence of this particular disorder in which the individual tries to solve bruxism/teeth grinding but it is considered to be undertaken as well.TMJ headaches are also a contributing issue to your skull, and the craniofacial muscles of the problem.Debilitating pain causes a TMJ sufferer myself, I would like to say the least.In order to find out if you make an appointment.

This will completely eliminate pain and improve the flow of qi in the joint that connects the lower jaw in this method, you can about both conditions, and speak with your right fist.The use of a medical professional, but TMJ exercises can be very painful depending on the tops of our jaw.You may need an honest analysis from someone known as arthrocentesis which typically doesn't cause any problems.You could combine the use of many great remedies for TMJ.There are many types of drugs aimed at addressing the condition becomes painful.

#X Ray Tmj Cpt Code Stunning Tips #How Long Will It Take To Cure Tmj

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godsofmonster · 7 years

Text

Summer Boy ≽ VI.

jungkook x reader- Summer au

Genre- Smutty plot

Word Count- 7,800

≽ Links to previous chapters can be found on my masterlist in my bio because Tumblr sucks now! You can also click on the ‘Summer Boy’ tag!

Hey, there summer boy. I’m a busy girl who doesn’t have too much time for fun. Maybe just for this time, I’ll be yours and you’ll be mine. Don’ t be sad when the sun comes up and you wake up to find me not around, I had to go. But you promised to pay me back for last night and we still have all summer after all.

The last thing I remembered was that kiss before we said goodnight. The warmth and dampness of Jungkook’s naked skin against my own. I remember looking forward to waking up with him still asleep and his arms still holding me. But when I did wake up and found him sleeping in my bed; the only feeling I was met with was remorse.

Jungkook was sleeping heavily by my side. The sun was out early and the only reason I had woken up was because I felt the need to throw up. I couldn’t handle my alcohol after a night of drinking, and the liquor wanted to leave my system immediately. Jungkook didn’t even stir when I jumped out of bed and stumbled into the bathroom. I pushed through the mess of my hair and let my head hang over the toilet.

After vomiting unpleasantly for a few minutes, I flushed the toilet and closed the lid. Standing over the skin and cupping water from the faucet to wash the awful taste from my mouth. My head was pounding with a major headache and the light from outside was causing my eyes to hurt. I splashed some cool water on my face as the events of the night before came to light.

I was in a state of foolishness, oblivious to the consequences and long-term effects of my actions. I was playing with Jungkook’s emotions and even my own. Regardless of what I might have felt last night, that wouldn’t change what was to come. The truth of the matter was that Jungkook and the rest of the boys were going home sooner than expected. There wasn’t time for anything else to happen between us, and I wanted to end this as painlessly as possible. I heard walking and light talking out in the hall. Coco and Mina were always the first ones up in the mornings. In no time would they come knocking at my door for breakfast. I walked back into the bedroom, finding any clean clothes to put on quickly. I slightly jumped at the sudden sound of Jungkook snoring. I turn around to look at him, spread out in my bed with the sheets only covering his lower half. His lips were parted and slightly dry, but he looked good all the while. If I wasn’t sober I would have probably climbed back to his side and enjoyed laying there in his company.

“Well, you’re up early.” Mina said, utterly surprised. I ran into her as soon I shut the door to my bedroom. Though, I walked passed her without saying a word. “No offense but you look like hell, (Y/n).” Coco said as I walked into the kitchen. I opened up the cabinet to grab some aspirin, gazing at the clock for the time. It was barely 9 o’clock and I wasn’t looking forward to what the day was going to bring.

I took a seat on the counter chair, brushing my fingers through my tangled hair, as I thought about my next move.

I didn’t know just how much Jungkook would remember. Hell! I wasn’t even sure of what I remembered. What about the things I don’t remember? One thing was for sure though; Jungkook stayed the night because I had asked him too. “(Y/n)?” Coco called out. I snapped my head to see her standing next to me. “You seem really out of it. What’s wrong?”

I didn’t know how to respond in a matter of simple words. There would be too many questions to answer if I did. Before I could prepare myself to speak, the back door burst open; Taehyung standing there with Namjoon behind him. We were all startled by the forced entrance.

“Taehyung! You can still knock.” Namjoon scolded. He sounded in distress and Taehyung was only adding to it.

“Sorry guys but we have a problem.” Taehyung explained.

“What happen?” Coco asked, placing the rag she had been wiping down the kitchen counter with down.

I had never seen them so worried. Taehyung looked panicked the most, while Namjoon was trying to keep his composer.

“Jungkook didn’t come home last night.” Namjoon said as they stepped in. Coco and Mina began to worry as well and tried to comfort the boys to calm down before jumping to any conclusions.

“I know we sound dramatic but Jungkook has never not made it home.” Taehyung argued before noticeing my lack of speaking, the fact that I was even present was surprising to him. He stepped over to me, his brown eyes were wide with concern and he touched my hand. He wanted to ask me about Jungkook but also wanted to know how I was doing. After everything Taehyung was the closest one I had grown to.

“Everyone else is already out looking at places he likes to hang out.” Namjoon asked if we could help as well. Taehyung didn’t ask me anything but only stayed by my side, comforting himself and unknowingly, me as well.

“Would you know where he is by any chance, (Y/n)?” Coco asked suddenly.

It seemed to be an idea everyone else had missed besides Taehyung. They all turned to look in my direction and Taehyung’s hand fell off my arm. I felt like they were all gathered around my sitting figure, standing tall and intimidating. I opened my mouth to speak, any answer at all, but before I could-

“I’m here.”

I shut my eyes, flinching at the sound of his voice. They all turn to find him standing at the doorway entrance to the kitchen. Jungkook had only put his jeans on and his hands tucked into his pocket. He looked as hungover as I did, probably worse but still managed to look good. I watched my friends gawk over him, while at the same time, question everything they thought they knew. I could see that everybody was majorly stunned and probably wanted to question Jungkook and me; but first, I had some questions of my own.

“We were just about to go for a talk…” I mumbled, bringing the attention back to myself. “Right, Jungkook?”

“Yeah…” With that, I got up from my seat quickly and walked passed him back into my room. “I’ll be at the house in a bit.”

I sat on the edge of my bed, my hands were running up and down my thighs skittishly. Jungkook followed into the room just seconds later. He stood by the door, feeling the distance and rejection between us. A lump in my throat gave me the feeling of tears in my eyes, but I took in a sharp breath, just wanting to rip this off like a band-aid.

“Jungkook last night got out of control. I don’t know what I said- what I did- and I apologize if I led you on in anyway.” The words rambled out of my mouth like the vomit from earlier.

The only reason I stopped speaking was because the loud sound of Jungkook’s fist against the wall had frightened me. His hair hung over his eyes, casting a shadow, to which I could not make them out. “No! I’ll tell you what happen last night,”

I had never heard Jungkook raise his voice, even as little as this. He took heavy steps coming my way. I shifted my eyes away from him, looking down at the floor where his shirt laid along with the bottle of Jack. “What happened is that you finally admitted how you truly felt.” The closer he stood by me the harder I found it to breathe. “For just once, you stopped being so paranoid and protective, letting yourself actually feel.”

“I have to paranoid!” I stood on my feet, yelling loud enough for anyone to hear. “I have to protect me! If I don’t, who will?!”

Jungkook’s expression soften at my tears; he took another step towards me, less aggressively. He grabbed my hands from my side, holding them carefully as if he’ was scared to break them.

“You’re scared that I will eventually let you go, but that’s are just your insecurities and your stupid ego.”

I yanked my hands away from his touch. I stepped past him, not wanting to look at him any longer. I used the back of my hands to wipe the tears from my cheeks.

“I can’t fall for you- I won’t, Jungkook.” My shoulders tensed as he placed his warm hands on them. I felt him standing right behind me and the tickle of his breath on my neck.

“But you already have.” He pressed a merciful kiss upon my cheek. Then left my body, making me feel cold, as I watched him step out of my room from the corner of my eye.

Not long after Jungkook left, Bitsy and Coco walked into my room to find me crying in bed. They all came in to comfort me and I ended up telling them everything that had happened this past week. It hadn’t been the first time they had to sit and listen to my problems. Especially Coco, who I had known the longest and was with me all throughout high school and its drama. She stayed with me regardless of what anyone said about me. Before I was strong enough to protect myself; I had her. They gave me my space when all was said and done, but made sure I could feel their support.

Bitsy explained that they had made plans with the guys to have a cookout later today, but said they were willing to stay in with me. The boys were leaving in two days because something had gone wrong with Jin’s University entrance. If this was me two days ago I would have just stayed inside regardless, but I didn’t want to be like that anymore. I told her that they could go and I would go along with them. Despite what happened with Jungkook and me, I wanted to spend time with the rest of the guys one last time, like we did that first day of summer.

The day went by slowly, by 4 o’clock we were all getting ready to go down to the guy’s house. It was an extremely hot day and we were probably going to be in the water. I had my bikini top on but wore shorts over my bottoms, not really feeling like being in the water to begin with.

When we got out there, Jin and Yoongi were by the grill, working on the food that I could already smell. Jimin and Taehyung were already in the water playing around and trying to wrestle each other, while Hoseok was on the beach trying to build something in the wet sand. Namjoon and Jungkook were just walking out of the house, each holding a side of a heavy cooler.

“(Y/n)!” Before I knew it Taehyung had come up behind me and pulled me over his shoulder. I loud yelp left my mouth as he ran with me towards the water.

“Tae wait!” I kicked my feet as he laughed like a lunatic child.

“Taehyung! Let her go.” He stopped at hearing Jungkook’s voice yell out at him.

He placed me down on the sand right away. He looked like a sad puppy as he mumbled an apology to me. It was sometimes hard to remember that he was actually older than me. It was obvious he just wanted to have fun and probably get my mind off what happened this morning.

I looked down at my shorts, unbuttoning them and pulling them down my legs, to reveal my bikini bottoms. An awkward blush spread across Taehyung’s face and I shoved his shoulder playfully.

“Bet I could swim faster than you.” His boxy smile returned to his face as we ran off into the cold water.

We both jumped into the water, I let my hair get soaked despite the cold temperature, that had me shaking as I came back up. My girls cheered for me from the shoreline, making me laugh as I pushed the hair out of my face. I turned to look at Taehyung but I furrowed my eyebrows to not seeing him anywhere. Suddenly, I felt two hands grab a hold of my feet and pulled me back down with an unexpected strength. I came back to the surface to find Taehyung giggling, Jimin coming behind him to jump on his back.

“Hey!” Jimin laughed as he clung onto Taehyung’s back. “Let me get on your shoulders!”

I looked over to Bitsy, signaling her over with a simple hand gesture. She dropped her beach bag and untied the long scarf from her waist. Skipping over to the water, she squealed as her foot touched the cold water.

“Come on!” I laughed walking towards her. Bitsy shook her head, complaining that it was too cold. I grabbed a hold of her hands and dragged her into the water, ignoring her over-dramatic screams. “Shut up! You’re in already.”

She splashed water on my face, laughing at my flinching reaction. I saw Taehyung holding onto Jimin’s legs as they rested over his shoulders. I patted my shoulders and told Bitsy to hop on for herself so we could play against them.

“Ouch! My hair.” I said as he climbed on my shoulders and tangled her little claws on my head. She only shushed me as she made herself comfortable. “Onward and upwards!” Jimin yelled, kicking his heel at Taehyung like he was a horse. They came walking in our direction and I met them halfway. My hands held tightly on her ankles to help her keep her balance as she let go of my head. I stood face to face with Taehyung, as Bitsy did the same with Jimin.

The next thing I knew, they were locking hands and trying to push each other off. I stumbled in the water to keep her from falling off but she was definitely stronger than she looked. Taehyung was cheering on Jimin from under him, also noticeably struggling to hold him up. Jimin’s arms seemed really strong and he was in better shape than I thought but I’m sure he was going ease on Bitsy. He was just almost knocking her over but not enough to actually fall, regardless of her attempt, there was no way she way going to win. So I had to take the matter into my own hands it seemed. With my left foot, I began to tickle Taehyung’s underwater, his eyes immediately widened at me.

“That’s cheating!” He yelled before he began to laugh from the sensation of my foot on his. His laughing cause Jimin to have a harder time as Taehyung tried to move away from my feet.

“It’s not cheating if we win!” Bitsy responded, shoving harder towards Jimin. Taehyung smirked as I almost lost my balance from bouncing on one foot. Then he patted Jimin’s ankles, warning him he was going to lett them go and leaving him to balance on his own. Taehyungs hand reached out towards me, trying to tickle my sides. All I could was back up but he came closer and the water came up to my chest. I couldn’t let go of Bitsy’s ankles or she would fall for sure and I couldn’t go deeper into the water.

“You wanted to play dirty.” Jimin laughed, still fighting against Bitsy arm. A part of me thought I could maybe fight against Taehyung’s tickles and just hold it in. But once his fingers were running over my sides, my body started to squirm and Bitsy’s height was becoming harder for me to carry.

“No! (Y/n) hold on!” Bitsy screamed as I started stumbling backward. Laughs fell from my mouth and then Bitsy fell from my shoulders.

My stomaching was aching from the laughter as I turned around to check if she was okay. The boys were cheering behind me as I offered Bitsy my hand out of the water. When she took it, she pulled me right in with her. She’s a lot stronger than she looks. Tae and Jimin just helped us both out of the water, when Jin had called out for us to get some food.

We stepped out of the water, Bisty handing me a towel to dry myself off before slipping back on my shorts. Everyone gathered back around the brick patio, just talking casual stuff while eating. I was sitting next to Coco and Taehyung and could not find Jungkook anywhere. I looked around for him and found him sitting on the beach, adding to the sand castle Hobi had created. He must have eaten while we were in the water.

“You know what we should do?” Taehyung suddenly said in a middle of a conversation. “We should have a re-match in volleyball.”

Hobi hit Taehyung on the arm for his idea. Taehyung had obviously had not thought about the awkwardness that it would cause between Jungkook and I. Yoongi continued talking without taking notice of Taehyung’s comment. It made me feel bad that things were so uncomfortable because of Jungkook and I. After eating we all went back down onto the beach, some of them were tossing around a frisbee, while others were in the water. Hobi and Jin were competing to see who could build the best sandcastle. That was before Taehyung had dared Jimin to step on Hobi’s hour long creation, followed by a swift flying kick and wrestling in the sand. I decided to take a spot next to Yoongi, as he laid on a beach chair with a pair of sunglasses on. Yoongi was in charge of playing the music from the speaker he had plugged into his phone. I took that time to just watch everyone have a good time and get a bit of a tan. I was also was pretty tired from eating and was resting my eyes shut.

“Watch out!” I didn’t even hear that before I got hit by a ball on my shoulder. I gripped my arm and hissed, ready to yell at probably Taehyung for losing control of the ball. “I am so sorry!”

But to my surprise, the ball had actually come from the house next door, which I didn’t even know was being used this summer. A random guy came jogging towards me as I sat up and grabbed the soccer ball that hit me.

“Yugyeom?!” Then all of a sudden I see Jungkook jump on this guy. They both started laughing asking each other questions.

“What are you doing here Kook?” Jungkook stepped back after embracing his friend. They both had a big bunny like smile on their faces.

“NAMJOON!” A group of guys came walking behind Yugyeom, one of them running straight to Namjoon.

“Oh God.” I hear Namjoon laugh while everyone gathered around each other. The guys all greeted one another, obviously knowing each other from somewhere. My friends and I stood there kind of awkwardly, Yugyeom noticing.

“Oh I’m Yugyeom. Sorry I hit you with the ball.” He said extending a hand out for me to shake. As I shook his hand I could feel Jungkook staring at me as he was standing between us.

“(Y/n)?” I turned my head to the side, hearing my name leave the mouth of the guy who was clinging to Namjoon.

“Oh, Jackson…” He walked over straight to me, pulling me into an awkward hug, before kissing my cheek.

The fact that he was shirtless and in swimming trunks really didn’t help the hug either. I knew the others were looking at us strangely, especially Jungkook. I could almost feel his stare burning a hole in me. Jackson mumbled something in my ear during our embrace and when he pulled away he waited for an answer.

“Sorry what?” I asked stupidly. I didn’t hear him because I was too worried about what Jungkook must be thinking.

“I said I texted you a couple nights ago, you didn’t answer.” It was obvious he had mumbled it to me because he didn’t want to put me on the spot in front of everyone but I hadn’t really left him a choice.

“Yeah, sorry my phone’s been acting up lately.” I had forgotten just how good looking he really was. After he gave me his number at the beginning of the summer, I had texted him a couple of times. We surprisingly had good conversations and some innocent flirting every now and then.

“Well, we could finally hang out before you go home.” He smiled down at me. It was that same smile he gave me the day we met, it looked cute but was secretly suggestive.

“Yeah, you guys should hang out. I still have some food on the grill.” Jin said pulling me out of a very uncomfortable position whether he knew it or not. They all agreed and followed Jin over back to the patio. I looked over to Jungkook, meeting a cold glare of his before Yugyeom put in arm around his shoulder, while Jackson did the same to me. He was telling me about his work but I couldn’t concentrate on his words with all the thoughts that were running through my head. To think that I had been flirting with one of the guys other friends, while still sleeping with Jungkook! I didn’t even want to think about what they thought about me now. I felt like there was a pressure on my chest that made me want to cry.

My eyes made contact with Coco and she mouthed a ‘who’s he’ to me. All I could do was shake my head but then she gestured over to Jungkook. He was with Yugyeom, Taehyung, and Mark in a conversation but he glanced my way when he could. Jackson still had his arm around me but was looking to his other side, talking to Namjoon about God knows what.

My heart was pounding along with my head, a part of me felt like I was going to cry and the other like I was going to hurl. My face was heated, feeling like everyone was staring at me. I needed water or something before I had a panic attack.

“I’ll be back,” I said removing Jackson’s arm from my shoulder. I quickly made my way inside Jin’s house, walking over to the bathroom in their dark living room.

I flipped the light switch and shut the door with the lock. I ran my fingers through my damp hair and fixed my bikini top from being so low. I pressed my hands against the edge of the sink and allowed my head to hang for a moment. I needed to find a way to leave this party. A good reason so no one would be suspicious. I couldn’t stay with Jackson constantly trying to make his move on me, not knowing that I’ve been fucking his friend all summer. I turned on the water to as cold as possible, soaking my hands and running them over my forehead and the back of my neck. I was almost willing to break my own foot to get out of here. Maybe I could text Bitsy and she would help me come up with something, I thought as I dried my hands on the hanging towel behind me. Taking a deep breath, getting ready to walk back out there and be met with Jungkook’s deathly gaze. But, once I opened the door, I was met by that same gaze immediately.

“Jungkook!” I yelped, stepping back as he stepped in. His eyes stared right into mine as he used his hand to slam the bathroom door shut.

“So you’re fucking Jackson too? This entire time?!” Jungkook’s voice sounded so deep and loud it actually frightened me.

“No! It’s not like that.” The bathroom wasn’t very big and his enormous body was blocking the only entrance and exit.

“Bullshit!” He cursed through his teeth, closing any space between us, trapping me against the cold tile wall and his heated body. His head was blocking the light and casting a shadow over me.

“Look,” I said calmly in an attempt to ease him down. “I haven’t even seen him since the summer started Jungkook, okay? I swear on m-”

Jungkook’s lips pressed into mine, roughly and with a heated rage. I was utterly confused and relieved. He was pressing his lips hard into mine it was almost painful. His mouth was moving quickly and I struggled to keep up with him. My fingertips merely grazed his cheek before his hands gripped my wrists, pinning them against the wall.

“I don’t believe you.” He breathed out livid before continuing to bruise my lips with his own. Though I should have just let it pass, my attitude wouldn’t allow it. I fought against his restraining hold, pushing him off me.

“Fuck you!” I barked. Jungkook seemed unaffected by my insult. “I don’t need to explain myself to you. I could be fucking as many guys as I want!”

He suddenly chuckled at me, as if what I had said was amusing to him. But I was actually angry, I had so many emotions build up in me and nowhere to put it.

“But you’re still only fucking me.” Jungkook was just furiously turned on; seems like he was directing his anger to sex.

“Get out of my way, Jungkook.” I said, trying to step around him but he grabbed my waist and pushed me against the wall again.

“You’re not going anywhere.” He said, hushing me from saying anything at all. “You pissed me off, (Y/n). And I want to hear an apology from that dirty little mouth of yours.”

I hated to acknowledge that his tone and sex appeal were achingly tempting. “Make me.”

There was a quick shine in his eyes before they darkened completely. Jungkook grabbed me off the wall, with our chest were touching, before he moved his hands over his trunks.

“On your knees.” I blinked at him. Did I hear him correctly? Jungkook’s hand ran over the bulge, reaching into his waistband and gripping himself. “Now!”

Jungkook pushed my shoulder down with his free hand. I was down on my knees in front of him in a matter of seconds. I stared at his hidden hand as he tugged at the skin. His trunks were still wet and taking the shape of his thighs. I licked my lips and looked up, waiting for his next orders. Jungkook pushed the wet fabric down, pulling out his hard on. He gripped the back of my neck, pulling my face closer while caressing my cheek with his thumb.

“You know what to do.” I opened my mouth, sticking my tongue out for him. He brought his swollen tip and tapping against my tongue. “Spit.”

I collected what I had in my mouth, letting it drip onto my hand. He moved his hand from his cock, letting me take a hold of it. With my saliva working as a lubricant, I pumped my hand from the base to the tip. Jungkook held in a groan as I applied presses at his sensitive tip. The sound sent a bolt of pleasure to my core, feeling moisture collect in my bikini bottoms. I peered up at him, through my lashes while bringing my lips to his head. He still looked angry but he couldn’t hide how much he was enjoying this. I planted a kiss right at his tip and licked over the same skin.

“Mouth.” Jungkook grabbed my wrist, releasing his hand from his throbbing length. “Hands behind your back.”

Resting my hands on the small of my back as his hand pushed away any hair on my face. I wrapped my lips around his head, sucking lightly and making him curse under his breath. My attempt of teasing was met with a pull of my hair. Jungkook pushed more of his cock past my lips. My reflex was to place a hand on his thigh to steady myself but he wouldn’t let me touch him with anything other than my mouth. I fought the urge to gag and allowed him to go as deep as he wished. Relaxing the walls of my throat and mouth, only moving my tongue against the veins of his dick. Saliva was building in my mouth, creating that warm wet sensation he loved so much. I tried to look up at him but could not see past his toned stomach. Jungkook slowly began to rock his hips, gripping the back of my head harder with his hand. The opposite hand cupped my jaw, his fingertips grazing over my cheek for me to hollow them out. Jungkook grunted at the suction of my mouth, slowing down his hips and looked down my way. I could feel his cock twitch against my cheek, my chin was covered in my own drool.

“You look so pretty, I could almost forgive you,” Jungkook mumbled with a playful tone of evil in the depths of his voice. He pulled me off his cock for a second, letting me catch my breath. “But I won’t until you swallow all my come.” I nod my head, causing him to bit down on his lip, trying to hide his smile. He was such a child, he couldn’t stay mad at me. Just as I was going to respond with my own comment, there was a knock at the bathroom door.

“(Y/n)?” I froze at the sound of Jackson’s voice. I looked up at Jungkook asking him what to do. Jackson’s presence visibly annoyed Jungkook to the core. I was afraid of what Jungkook might do or say. “You in there?”

“She went home,” Jungkook said a bit aggressively. Just before I could mouth him anything, he shoved my face back into his hips. I gripped him in my hand and took him back in my mouth.

“Jungkook?” He rolled his eyes and his nose twitched. I squeezed his base and maintained eye contact as he struggled to speak. “Why? Did she tell you something?”

“She wasn’t feeling w-well.” He shook his head at me, smirking down and caressing my face. “I think she has something to take care of.”

“Damn…” Jackson said faintly through the door. He smirked down at me but hissed when my teeth grazed over his cock. “You coming back out?”

“I need to get up early.” He said quickly, wanting him to just leave already. He hung his head, trying to concentrate on me and my mouth alone.

I barely heard when Jackson responded but his footsteps let us know he was already on his way out. Jungkook chuckled above me starting to steady his hips back and forth into my mouth. His hand gripped my hair by the roots, keeping my head still.

“Relax your mouth baby.” I tried to do as he said. My gag reflex was acting up causing me to swallow around him. “Shit!”

I couldn’t stop myself from slipping my fingers into my shorts. My fingers were met by my arousal dripping from my folds. I jolted as my pad of my fingers came in contact with my clitoris. My body was already so worked up and sensitive that I was becoming overwhelmed without any friction between my legs. My thighs shut around my wrist as my fingers dug into my throbbing clit. A moaned made its way up my throat and vibrated onto Jungkook’s cock.

“Hey!” He suddenly yelled. He pulled my head off his dick from the back from my hair. His chest was rising deeply and he looked mad again. “Are you touching yourself?”

I bit my lip but stilled smiled up at him. I nodded my head and gave him a look of innocents as I continued my perverted actions. Humming as I moved my fingers quicker and looked down at my lap, Jungkook and I both watching how my hand disappeared into my shorts. He leaned down and gripped both of my wrists, pulling my hand away from my core, and onto my feet.

“Who gave you permission? Did I say you could touch yourself?” I pouted my lips and shook my head no.

“It just feels so good.” I groaned, pushing myself against him. His hard cock was still out and he had to hold in a grunt when the denim of my shorts brushed against it. Jungkook stepped to the side, letting go of my wrist to open the door, before tugging me out in front of him.

“Go to my room.” He said walking behind me, slapping my behind hard with the palm of his hand.

Jungkook pinned me to his bed, leaning down to bite down on the thin skin of my neck. He sucked a love bite on my neck the size of his mouth. My legs were pressed together while he kneeled beside them. He gripped my wrists with a single hand, and his tongue brushing against the raw bite. I whined under his mouth and fought slightly against his hand. Jungkook only pinned my wrists further into his sheets. “Turn over.”

Jungkook guided me onto my hands and knees, his hand pressed down on my back to lower my chest to the bed. He grabbed both my arms and held them behind my back. I laid there with my ass in the air and head against the pillow. “Jungkook-” I began to whine for his touch. He responded with his hand coming down on my covered ass. His hit made me jerk and groan as the smack went straight to my already throbbing core.

“Don’t speak,” His voice was dangerously low. “Or I’ll add more to your punishment.”

My lips were pressed into a thin line as I nodded my head towards him, making short eye contact before my eyes shut at the next smack. The slight stinging sensation made me whine and instinctively push my ass back. Jungkook’s hand rested on my bottom, leaving me with different times in between each hit to add for suspense. My heart was pumping blood to all places of my body, making me squirm and grow rather warm. Thoughts of all sorts ran through my head, every scenario and possible outcome went wild with the help of my hormones Jungkook set on fire.

“You like this, don’t you?” I moaned sweetly and turned to look at him with a pleasured smile on my face. “Of course you do.”

Jungkook chuckled to himself. I could feel my ass cheek burn and blush red under the material of my shorts. The pain wasn’t uncomfortable at all, it was arousing and could bring me to tears. Jungkook took a moment to pull down the fabric keeping me away from his bare hand. I helped him by kicking it off my ankles before hearing it drop off the bed. My dripping core was exposed to him now. I could only imagine his view of his hand printed on my ass. Jungkook moved on his knees to kneel behind me. His hand brushed against my own, that rested still on the small of my back, he followed up the dip of my back up to my perked ass.

With both hands he pushed my cheeks forward, peeking at my wet cunt and how it pulsed already. “You’re a mouth-watering sight.”

I became embarrassed by his comment and the thought of being put on display so openly. But the shameful asset created yet another new found fire within me. Before I could question his next intentions, I was met by his mouth scattering kissed on the sore areas of my ass. It was his tender way of apologizing after the poor abuse the skin had gone through. I couldn’t stop myself from squirming my hips backward towards him. Jungkook’s lips formed into a smile before biting down unexpectedly. His fingers grazed their way up my leg, leaving a trail of goosebumps as he came closer to my heated core. The tips of his fingers flicked over my clit just to find a reaction from me. My body jolted at his touch and the action pleased him. My heat was pulsing and he could surely feel it as he ran the pads of his fingers over my wet skin.

“You’re making such a mess for me.” Jungkook’s mouth was then pressed against my slick folds, his tongue wasting not a second or a drop of my arousal. My legs were shaking as he worked his fingers and hot mouth at the same time, skillfully and confidently without hesitation. The sensation spread, bubbling from the very bit of my stomach to the tips of my toes. Jungkook’s mouth was letting out lewd sounds of sucking and slurping.

My head was light and my core was pounding, unknown sounds of their own were falling from my lips. My fingers were still locked behind my back, and my nails dug into the palms of my sweaty hands. Though I could barely keep my eyes open, I so badly wanted to his face. How his fingers and lips glistened with my flowing wetness. How his soft hair stuck to his pretty face from the sweat he drenched. “Agh…Jungkook.”

He removed his mouth from my core and blew cool air at my heat, all I could do was squirm and whine. His finger moved up to my entrance, rubbing around it before slipping it in and speaking.

“This one finger isn’t enough to satisfy you, right?” I nodded my head and shut my eyes. It wasn’t enough but it was from him. The single digit was deep to his knuckle, Jungkook used the pad of his fingertip to stroke at my convulsing walls. “Well make it enough.”

He stopped his action completely and kept his finger within me. Without having to say it I understood what he was asking of me. My hips gladly began to rock against him on their own, taking in his slim finger and trying to find my satisfaction. My walls tightening around him and my anticipation becoming too much to bare. It may have only been a single finger but any touch of his was hot provoking. My tongue was tied by sounds of desperation and lust. “You want it so bad,” Jungkook snickered. “Such a good girl…”

Just as I was taking him back in, he slipped in another finger. I shivered violently with pleasure, like scratching a spot you couldn’t reach. His longer finger brushed against the very spot that always had me on the brink of begging and screaming.

“There!” I yelped with joy. Jungkook took it upon himself to find that spot once more, circling around it and making me suffer. “God. Jungkook please…”

I felt the sudden urge to cry from the build up frustration and tense in my body. Jungkook removed his soaked fingers from my core, making sure to curl them up on the way out. I felt so empty and my knees only shook more. I could feel the bit of sweat that began to form on my hairline. I wanted to take him and force myself on his lap, knowing how much he would actually love that. But there was something for him to prove in this situation and I had to let him make things right.

“You think you can take my cock now?” Jungkook had leaned over, taking a hold of my folded hands, and bit the lobe of my ear. His rock hard cock was pressing against my behind, purposely looking to get some relief for himself. The best ‘yes’ I could manage was just above a whisper.

Jungkook was quick to roll me over onto my back; his hands gently running along my inner thighs to spread them open. He lowered himself to hover over me, my chest was almost touching his and he had rocked his core into my on his way down. His shirt was removed and only his trunks remained. My breath was caught as we locked eyes; having his eyes on me did more than his hands ever did. The atmosphere and the tone in the room completely changed and became humble. Our bodies so close sharing one temperature. Jungkooks dominant and teasing persona from before was gone for that moment that we held the gaze. He looked like he about going to say something; something that would ruin the moment, so he said nothing at all.

So he just moved his hand down to pushed his trunks down enough to get himself free. He was still looking at me, his eyes reading over the details of mine again and again. Not even when his tip rested against my entrance, did his eyes change. Jungkook watched as my lips parted in a slight gasp as he pushed himself in.

Jungkook turned his head away as his face could not hide the pleasure he felt at being engulfed by my walls. His movements were shallow, stretching out my walls and finding a rhythm for ourselves. As much as I shook under his gaze I missed looking into his eyes. My hands found his face and made him turn may way. He leaned in to kiss me gently, puffs of air coming from our noses as he began to fill me up completely. His bed was creaking at the rock of his hips and it became harder to breathe with our mouths attached. My fingers dug into his cheeks lightly before he grabbed a hold of my wrists and re-pinned them above my head. Moving upwards away from my face, he snapped his hips into mine. “J-Jungkook!” My head leaned back as he hung his low enough to barrier himself at my neck. He bit harshly at my skin and I thought I heard him shush me. He sucked on my neck, with every intention of marking me as his. His thrusts we rough but didn’t feel relentless at all. It was a deep, passionate kind of sensation every time his skin slapped against my own. It was like he wanted to be upset and fuck my brains out but he was too intoxicated and driven by the pleasure. It was hard to get a clear understanding of what his actions meant because he had me practically melting under him.

He moved like a dance and every thrust was on beat. My body was immobilized by the pleasure and all I could do was sit there and take it. Every inch of him sent me to another realm in my own body. Falling apart in his company while he rebuilds me at the same moment. I wanted to touch him, hold him and keep him with me. But this was my punishment for all my past and future wrongs to him.

“Could he fuck you like me?” Jungkook still wouldn’t remove himself from my neck. But his words were serious and not meant as a tease.

“No, no!” I whimpered loudly. I was always so prideful, afraid that he would do something to hurt mine but I ended up hurting his. His hands tightened around my wrists, feeling like he was cutting my blood flow.

“Was he better than me?” Jungkook looked up at me. It stung to see what I saw back looking at me. In his eyes, sorrow mixed with pleasure.

“Never.” The reassurance left my mouth firmly as his thrusts slowed down. Jungkook stopped halfway inside me, his hold on my wrists loosen completely and he brought his hands to my side, holding himself up as he caught his breath. His head hung above my chest, his emotions were getting to him and didn’t know what to believe. “Hey, look at me.”

He was embarrassed completely. He knew he had no right to be angry with me because there were no promises between us. I understood him though and would have probably felt the same way if the roles were switched. Jungkook chewed on his inner lip as he thought and barely looked my way. “I’ve only been with you this entire time.”

He pushed himself up and pressed his mouth to mine. His hand cupped my cheek while he slipped his tongue passed my lips. Moving up to me made him push himself all the way inside me, my walls throbbed and that made us moan.

“Uh, fuck.” Jungkook hooked one of his arms around my leg, pulling it upwards and opening better angles. He was going slow, enjoying each time he sank into me. My hand ran up his arm and around his neck. I reach the back of his head and gripped the hair I could fit between my fingers.

“Ahh yess!” The tug I gave to his hair made him thrust harder. My core was burning and pulsing, craving for a sweet release. The sounds of our mouths and our skin was echoing throughout the room. My hips jerked with every thrust and I held on to him.

“Say my name.” I did. I cried his name like it was all I knew. “Louder, baby.”

He was being ruthless and the pleasure was beginning to build and contract. I couldn’t even catch a breath, and my eyes were closed before I knew it. The leg he held and dug his fingers into was starting to shake. Jungkook could feel my body beginning to squirm and shudder. My moans were getting caught in my throat and, with a single spark in his eyes, Jungkook pushed me over the edge. Along with him finishing inside me for the first and last time.

My eyes were closed, his heavy breathing and hot breath against my ear. He hid his face away but pulled me in as close as possible. My body still trembling from the pleasure and I couldn’t lie, that his hold only made it better. The air surrounding us contained an amorous allure, skin like newborns and hearts like trains. Our bodies heated like the sun, with a feel of warm intimacy between us. I was trying to come up with any reason to stay like this with him for just a little longer, but like every time before, he only gave me a reason to leave.

“I love you…”

212 notes · View notes

zevakritpel · 7 years

Text

Hell-Bent: Prologue-- Introducing Our Colourful Cast of Characters

Chapter 1>

Fandom: Kuroko no Basuke

Pairing: Aokise, MomoRiko, Kagakuro, MuroMura, more???

u can find this on AO3 lol

Summary: Adult AU, Criminal Underworld AU. Where Kagami Taiga is a young heir suddenly targeted by 6 rather dangerous members of the criminal underworld (each with their own set of personal troubles), and Kuroko is a bodyguard with a dark past.

Warning: Violence, Strong language, a lil dark and angsty sometimes

[Wednesday. Time: 01:03. Meet the Sniper]

Today's lucky item for Cancers is a steel garlic press.

"Oi, Shin-chan. The target will be moving along the second floor, west wall any minute now. You ready?"

Midorima clicks his tongue impatiently and tenses his bandaged fingers against the cool metal of his M24. He's been lying on his stomach for the past half hour, with the kitchen utensil tucked inside his pants' pocket digging into his upper thigh the entire time. Still, with his intense focus and dedication, comfort comes secondary. Naturally.

Of course he's ready.

"Indeed."

The sharpshooter narrows his bright green eyes in concentration, and continues to watch the movements behind the windows of the building adjacent. His position on this warehouse roof really couldn't be more ideal. No wind either, and just the right amount of clouds in the sky.

Today's lucky numbers for Cancer: 15- 73- 3- 22- 47

Takao is still babbling needlessly into his ear piece, to the point where Midorima is tempted to turn off the sound of his voice completely. This is exactly why he prefers working solo...no, no. He must persevere. In this case, teamwork is important, especially with Takao 'Hawkeye' Kazunari.

"Alright you've got one shot at this, don't miss <3 "

"I never miss."

It's true. He never misses.

Today's target is a corrupt bureaucrat that got way above his head in his dealings with the underground. Pissed off all the wrong people, couldn't have managed to fuck up this hard if he tried.

Middle aged. 180 cm in height. Dark hair, olive skin. Has until now gone through great lengths to avoid facing the consequences for his greedy actions.

And yet the exact millisecond that he enters Midorima's range, his life is forfeit.

Today's horoscope for Cancers: You'll soon be faced with new challenges, in both work and romance. Advice: Be wary of those who bring up the past.

Midorima takes a deep, calm breath. His hands are perfectly steady; heartbeat unwavering.

"Man proposes; God disposes" he mutters, then pulls the trigger.

[Wednesday. Time: 02:09. Meet the Fake]

"As expected of a model," purrs the drunken businessman, sliding his fat sweaty hand up Kise's thin blue designer shirt and pressing his fingers against the small of the younger man's back.

"Your skin is so smooth . How nice to be so young."

Kise giggles nervously and starts absently toying with the thick cross pendant dangling from the silver chain on his neck. With his free hand, he fishes the lime out of his gin and tonic, drains the rest of the drink in one go.

"Hehe~. That tickles..."

The businessman practically leers at this reaction, but he stops groping Kise in order to take the empty glass from his hands, and saunters over to the hotel room's mini-bar.

"Another G&T?" he asks, pulling a bottle of Beefeater out of the small fridge.

Kise nods an affirmative yes, then he also stands up and walks over to where his new drink is being poured. His bare feet are light and silent against the carpeted floor.

"I'm so glad we moved to a more...private setting. "

"Me too."

Kise hums with a genuine smile, wrapping his arm around the other man's neck. He keeps at the chokehold for a few seconds until the businessman slumps down, out cold.

Ugh. That was a pain in the ass.

Well, okay. Thankfully it didn't come to that.

Planting one foot on the chest of the unconscious body, Kise readjusts his own disheveled clothing before pulling a few zip ties out of his pocket. One to secure the wrists together, and a couple around the ankles, for good measure.

Satisfied with his job of binding the pervy sleeping man, Kise next has to make a call. Quick dial.

"Are you done?" snaps the irritable voice of Kasamatsu on the other end of the line, without so much as a greeting.

"Easy-peasy! It wasn't any fun at all."

"Fun? This isn't a game, Ryouta."

"I know, I know," Kise lies with a pout, twisting his cross necklace around his fingers.

He does not know. Of course this is a game, that's the only way he can get into it.

"But it's lucky I copied that 'seduction' skill from-"

"'Seduction' isn't a skill you can copy, you tacky bimbo. Airheads like you are just naturally good at that shit, which is why I got you to do this job in the first place."

"KYAH ! Did you just praise m-"

"Shut the hell up. "

Kise's smile widens but the tears in his yellow eyes glisten like jewels.

"Anyways, now that you've lured him in, we've got how many hours until someone notices his useless ass is missing?"

"What is it now? 02:15....He says he's just got a meeting at 13:00 today."

"Perfect. I'm coming over to take care of the rest. You sit tight until then."

Kise hangs up with a despondent sigh. He plops himself down on the older man's stomach, which makes for a nice cushion to sit on. This guy's in for a real world of pain, huh?

The young man slips his pendant between his lips, sucking at the silver cross thoughtfully.

Not that this isn't exciting work or anything (it's not), but....Kise can't help but feel his jobs lately have been pretty lackluster. He's not really putting his special skills to use, fucking over these stupid lechers that get themselves into stupid troubles.

Something good better come soon. Otherwise...

The cross falls from Kise's lips onto his chest. Right against his heart.

[Wednesday. Time: 04:04. Meet the Chessmaster]

[white noise feed]

[Wednesday. Time: 23:52. Meet the Blood Knight and the Book]

"Ahh, that smarts a little."

Aomine spits out an alarmingly thick lump of blood and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. The taste of copper on his lips only further fuels his bloodlust, to the great misfortune of the four men surrounding him.

Not that they're fully aware of this quite yet.

"Listen, I'd love to play mafia with you kids, but I've got some grown up things I'd like to take care of, so why don't you just skip along home-WHOAH OKAY."

After dodging the bullet aimed at his left shoulder, Aomine finds his back pressed up against a brick wall. Behind his favourite nightclub, no less.

"You. You're going to pay for what you did." This coming from punk #3, who would sound a lot more formidable if he didn't look like he was about to cry.

Aomine rubs the side of his face, which still stings a bit from the earlier hit (courtesy of punk #1, who was granted the first number for actually managing to get within face-punching range of Aomine).

"You're going to have to be more specific." he laughs, though he's actually much more serious than his tone would imply. Aomine is a man who has done many things that could warrant armed pissbabies cornering him in a dark alley under the false illusion that they can harm him in any way.

He tries to mentally run through all the women he's slept with in the past month that could have had jealous lovers; it's too much work, so he gives up.

"Don't play dumb!"

This from punk #2, the gun-wielder, who seems to have realized halfway through that this kind of command is futile on Aomine. He clears his throat to elaborate:

"You've got a lot of nerve showing up in this area after the disrespect you showed our boss."

Aomine squints.

"Our boss.....last night? At the bar across the street? You broke his arm..."

Punk #2 is faltering at Aomine's complete lack of remembrance, but his comrades are growing livid.

"This motherfucker...guess we really should teach him a lesson."

Aomine's heart almost skips a beat when he sees Punk #1 pull a crowbar out of his bag. But his excitement is short-lived: the fight is over before it even begins. It takes less than 3 minutes to curb these shits into the ground and leave them writhing in the same pain and regret their boss experienced yesterday.

Pathetic.

Disappointed, Aomine kicks the unconscious Punk #4 in the ribs one last time, then staggers away from the bloodied scene and wanders off onto the main street.

Before he can brood over his easy win, Aomine spots a familiar someone leaning against a parking sign, waving right at him. That long, silky pink hair, the sweet but kinda shit-eating grin...the unmistakable three sizes-

"Hey, Dai-chan," Momoi smiles, walking up to greet him. She has to tilt her head quite a bit to maintain eye contact.

"I was worried about you after I heard you quit your job, but I'm glad that you're not above picking fights with petty thugs."

Aomine grimaces and covers half his face sheepishly with his fingers.

"Ugh. You saw that?"

"I sure did. Seriously, what the hell happened?"

Aomine would love to answer that. He really would.

"What about you, Satsuki? What brings you to this area?"

Momoi raises her eyebrows, to assure Aomine that his attempt to change the subject is not going unnoticed. However, more pressing issues are at hand.

"Looking for your NEET ass, actually. Here,"

She rummages through her bag--which is full of various papers, as is the lot in life of an information broker--before pulling out a small white envelope and handing it to her old childhood friend.

"What is this?"

"A job offer."

[Thursday. Time: 13:16. Meet the Target and the Phantom]

"Huh? A bodyguard? I don't know what my old man told you, but I can take care of myself."

Kagami Taiga's red eyes are glowing with his usual dose of boundless passion. Passion his family's Head of Security, Riko Aida, wishes he'd put into his studies. Or something. Christ, this kid is such a headache.

"Of course, I'm well aware of your physical prowess and fighting skills, Master Taiga. However, I'm afraid that, given the exposure of your existence as heir to the Kagami empire and...well, other matters-"

Riko pauses for a moment, taking a peek at Kagami's expression, which, though indignant, does not show that he picked up on the poorly explained set of circumstances. Like at all.

"Aside from the usual thugs, I have reason to believe a rather notorious, skilled set of people will be hired to come after you."

"Let them come," Kagami states rather fervently, slamming his open palm against Riko's wooden desk.

"I'll take them on."

Riko goes through physical pain in an attempt to avoid rolling her eyes. The attempt fails. Her patience has evaporated.

"Alright, well good luck with that. I'm still going to assign a 24-hour guard for you."

"WHA-?!"

"Lower your voice, you brat! He's worked in the underground since a young age, and has a lot of connections with these types of people. Be grateful to me that I'm not putting you on lockdown until this whole thing blows over."

The young Kagami is far from thrilled at this outcome, but even he can see there's no hope of winning this round. He sits back down in his chair with a small grunt of dissatisfaction, crossing his arms over his chest. A little petulant and overexcited, but always respectful. Riko doesn't bother to hide her smirk.

"So? When do I get to meet this guy?"

"Ah, now that you mention it, "

Riko checks the time on her wristwatch, her brow furrowed slightly.

" I told him to meet me in my office before you got here, but it seems he hasn't shown up yet."

"Uh, actually,"

Riko and Kagami both freeze for a half a second, their blood running cold, faces drained of all colour.

Moving by pure instinct, Riko pulls out a loaded handgun, ready to fire, while Kagami is already up and wielding his chair like a weapon. Both natural fighters are completely ready for bloodshed...until they register the source of the voice.

A small, pale young man, roughly Kagami's age, is standing at the back of the room, right under the small framed portrait of puppies Riko nailed to the wall a couple of weeks ago. (It used to sit on her desk, but Kagami kept covering it every time he came in through the office, so...)

"H-how long have you been there?" Riko, who has seen the carnage of multiple battlefields, barely stutters out.

"I was here the entire time." the stranger responds in a soft matter-of-fact voice, as if that isn't one of the creepier answers he could give.

Kagami gently places the chair back to its rightful place on the floor, pretending like he isn't suffering from massive heart palpitations.

"You called me here?" adds ghost child...no, no Riko, get a hold of yourself. He's clearly human...he's...

"OH. You must be Kuroko??" Riko, finally having regained her composure, extends an arm of welcome as he nods yes.

"You really... should've said something haha. please, take a seat."

That's him? The Kuroko Tetsuya, the notorious 'Phantom'??? But he looks so...frail. He's clad a white button down shirt and grey pants, neither of which could seem to be hiding some hidden muscle-definition. His skin is very pale, very anemic-looking. This can't possibly be...

Kuroko blinks back at Riko with his large, pale blue eyes. Though he appears expressionless, Riko can't help but feel a certain level of scorn emanating from this man. He's judging hard for being judged hard.

That's fair.

Riko chews at the nail of her thumb for one contemplative second,then decides to roll with the benefit of the doubt.

"Alright, Kagami Jr. This is the man who'll be sticking to you for the next...little while. Meet your new shadow."

"Eh?"

Kagami looks down in disbelief at the tiny pale blue creature that has just been assigned to protect his life.

A very small, very cold little hand places itself inside Kagami's own.

"Nice to meet you."

"You have got to be fucking kidding me..."

[Thursday. Time: 17:08. Meet the Reaper]

"Atsushi, you've got like fifteen missed calls. Please just answer your phone."

Murasakibara could answer his phone, but...he could also just shove another fistful of all-dressed chips into his mouth and not answer anything that remotely sounds like work.

"Atsushi...please. I think it's urgent."

Don't worry. Murasakibara makes sure to chew his food properly. It's better for digestion.

////

NEXT CHAPTER>

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bonchanbubbles · 7 years

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Poisoned Melody (Drama Ver) Chapter 2/3

Title: Poisoned Melody (Drama version) Chapter: 2/3 Characters: Ryu Jun Yeol, Park Shin Hye, Kim Taeri, Lee Jongsuk, Junsu, Jinhyuk Genre: Vampire AU, Fantasy Romance, Angst Author: Bonchan Disclaimer: This story is just fiction. I only own the plot. Main characters aren’t mine. Summary: Junyeol used to enjoy drinking every girl’s blood who’s in love with him. But what happened when his addiction changed after visiting a late stadium cancer patient who often played harmonica every night?

A/N: This fanfiction is dedicated for my two beloved sista who are currently suffered by happybeans virus LOL xD

Chapter 1 is here Chapter 3 is here

POISONED MELODY (2/3)

From a darkness curtain

bound in poisoned melody

long hidden beneath the moon

chords from an untouched beauty

“How…how…do you know my name?”

Shinhye wasn’t lying. Junyeol was sure of it. But how come she didn’t remember him as if there’s an eraser in her mind? They just met yesterday.

“Shinhye-ah. Are you okay?” He heard someone called him from outside the room.

Shinhye turned her head toward the door and answered, “Yes, Father! I just—“. Right when she turned back to face the stranger, Junyeol had already gone.

****

The night after, Junyeol came again. He still couldn’t believe what he witnessed last night. It’s too strange even for a vampire like him. He’s sure his sensitivity never deceived him. He’s one from the strongest clan between vampire races. He wanted to try again. If it’s proved that the harmonica player had tricked him, he would kill her without mercy for playing on him.

“Who are you?”

That harmonica player said the exact same words again once she met Junyeol for the third time. Junyeol stared at her in silence. Trying to act his role with the same lines as the two days before. He observed Shinhye’s orbs moves, her breaths, and her pulses.

“I ask you who are you? What are you doing here?”

“I… I heard the song you’re playing. So I came and jumped… here”

Shinhye smiled again, “You jumped here? Are you a fox? What’s your name by the way?”

“Junyeol”

She offered a hand, “I am Shinhye.”

Junyeol took her hand again, “Your song is beautiful”

“Thank you. Jongsukkie gave me this harmonica so I won’t feel bored”, Shinhye and Junyeol said in the same time. Shinhye stared at him widely. Had no idea why Junyeol could read her mind.

But once again, there’s no hint of lie from Shinhye’s words. “You’re a great actress, Park Shinhye”, he said coldly to the female.

Shinhye gave him a questioned look, “Huh? What do you mean?”.

Junyeol stared at her closer, hand still holding Shinhye’s. Then his eyes widened as he noticed something when he scanned over Shinhye’s body. There’s a strange temperature accumulated in her head, “There’s something wrong in your head”.

Shinhye pulled her hand away from him, then attached it to her tiny waist, “Hey, That’s rude. Did you mean I am crazy?” she pouted. Junyeol couldn’t help but chuckled.

“Yah!! What’s so funny?”

“Cute”

“What did you say?”

“You are cute. Pouting like that”, he pointed at Shinhye’s mouth.

Shinhye quickly covered her mouth and lowered her head to hide the blushing on her cheeks, “You… You’re weird”

Junyeol laughed, “Hahaha… Shinhye, can I hear you play your song with that harmonica again?”

Shinhye grinned, “Eeeyy, don’t tell me you’re my fan”.

Junyeol shrugged and smiled back, “You can say that”

Shinhye sat back to her bed, took her harmonica, and suggested Junyeol to sat beside her, “I have another song to play—“

“You want me to help you to choose which the best song you have to play at tomorrow prom night”, Junyeol cut her words. Junyeol’s expression turned sad. It must be something wrong with this woman’s memory, he thought.

Shinhye was stunned for a moment. Felt a bit scared, “Junyeol, how do you know what I would say?” She whispered.

Junyeol sighed, “Shinhye, you said exactly the same words yesterday and the day before that. This is not the first time I come here. You already said your name and called me a fox thrice. You also said about your friend Jongsukkie who gave you this harmonica and you told me about your plan to perform your song with it tomorrow”

Shinhye shook her head, couldn’t accept his words, “No. You’re lying”

“Shinhye, do you remember what date is today?”

“February…. February 13th , 1976”.

Junyeol shook his head, realized this was a serious matter, “It’s 2 months ago. Shinhye, I am telling you the truth. Your day is repeated with the same routine for three days. Even if I come again tomorrow, we will be to become strangers and you will ask my name again."

Shinhye held her head. Her face became sweaty. There’s some tears started to gather on the corner of her eyes, “No…No…!!” She squeezed her head as if she just got a strong headache.

“Shinhye, are you okay?”, Junyeol approached her.“Ugh…” Shinhye couldn’t answer as the pain took over her head.

Then Junyeol heard someone knocked Shinhye’s door, “Shinhye-ah, Are you okay?”

“Father!!!” Tears were streaming down though her cheeks as she couldn’t bear the pain.

Junyeol quickly got out to the balcony and hid behind the curtain as the door started to open. An old man whom Junyeol assumed as Shinhye’s father came to his daughter, laid her on the bed, then took some bottles from a cupboard. Junyeol watched he took an amount of tablets from them and let Shinhye drank them. He kept stroking Shinhye’s hair and whispering that she would be okay soon until his daughter was driven into sleep.

Junyeol looked worried and whispered to himself, ‘Shinhye, what on earth happened to you?’

****

The following day, Junyeol came again. This time he didn’t want to meet Shinhye but her father. Right after the old man opened the door, Junyeol stared at his eyes and hypnotized him to make the old man believed that he came as Shinhye’s old friend.

“He didn’t have much time left”, her father said as he pulled a cigarette from his pocket and lit it. Junyeol could see big eye bags under his eyes. He was sure that man had lacked sleep for days.

“Is her sickness... incurable?”

Shinhye’s father sucked his cigarette for a moment and released the smoke slowly, “A late stadium brain cancer.”

Junyeol looked hesitate for a second, then said, “So... that’s the cause why she lost her memories?”

The man eyed Junyeol in confuse, “How do you know about that?”

Junyeol tried to find a good reason for a moment, “Um…um… I heard some rumors”

Shinhye’s father sighed, “No. It’s a different case. She became like that since she lost her best friend in an accident before the prom night.”

Junyeol’s mind clicked on something, “Do you mean Jongsukkie?”

The man sucked his cigarette again. His eyes turned even sadder than before, “Yes. Lee Jongsuk. He meant a whole world for Shinhye. They’re best friend since childhood. Once she knew that she was diagnosed a late stadium brain cancer and didn’t have enough times, she was still as cheerful as she was before because she wanted to spend her life with family and her best friend. But after that accident, she became depressed and later diagnosed with a rare case of amnesia -- her memory stopped at February 13th, right before the accident.”

His tears were slowly streaming, he quickly rubbed them with his backhand, “Once she wakes up from her sleep, she is going to repeat it all over again.” He chuckled bitterly, his shoulder was a bit shaking, “That little wench….. I only have her. I wish I could take her pains. Both…”

****

“Who are you?”

Shinhye eyed him like a stranger again. This was the first time for Junyeol to not have any idea why he was so caught up with this dying woman. How his chest ached to accept the fact she didn’t remember his name. How he had to introduce himself every day. He never took a pity toward human. But this was far beyond just a pity. It’s more than that.

“I ask you who are you? What are you doing here?”

“I… just walked around the forest then heard a sound from harmonica. It’s beautiful. I just really like it.”

Shinhye blushed, “Really? Thank you. Jongsukkie gave me this harmonica so I won’t feel bored hehe…” Her eyes looked toward her balcony for a second then turned back to face Junyeol, “But... this is the third floor. How did you climb here? Are you a monkey?”

Junyeol giggled all of a sudden. “Hey, what’s so funny. I am asking you!” She pouted again. It’s Junyeol’s favourite gesture from her. He shook his head, “No. I thought you would call me fox.”

“Fox jump, monkey climb”, she said while crossing her arms.

Junyeol laughed more, “Cute.”

“What?”

Junyeol stopped laughing, only stared at her in silence for a second then said, “You... You’re cute.”

Shinhye stuttered, “Yo.. you.. I mean your voice. Do you purposely make your voice sound like that?”

Junyeol started to look at her a bit mischievously, making the female tried to avoid his eyes, “I usually sound like this. Anything wrong with my voice?”

Shinhye bit her lower lip and shake her head, “No. Nothing’s wrong”. She lowered her head as her face became very red. Junyeol came closer then lifted her chin to face her, “Can… can I hear the song you’re playing earlier?”

Shinhye smiled at him, “Sure. I have another song to play. Can you help me to choose which the best song I have to play for tomorrow prom night?”

Junyeol smiled back at her bitterly. There was a pang in his chest but he’s never been this happy for a long time. He realized that the first moment he heard the song from this woman. He’s already falling for her. There’s no place for him in her memory but even it’s hurt, he would come here again and again.

****

Since he met Shinhye, Junyeol stopped seducing girls nor he drank any human blood as he came every night to see her. He survived only by drinking erythrocyde (blood tablet). During those time, he didn’t realize that someone in the darkness was watching him.

“Stop meeting him Junyeol”, someone was leaning to the window of his castle, right before Junyeol wanted to flee through the forest.

“I don’t know what you mean Junsu. I am busy now.” Junyeol ignored him then took his coat from a hanger.

“You know what I mean. You don’t suppose to visit a human regularly like that”

Junyeol stared at his vampire friend. He chuckled a bit, “You know I always visit human and kill them in the end right?”

Just when Junyeol reached the main door of his castle, Junsu’s next words stopped him again, “You won’t kill her. I know from your pulse. You are falling. They will know soon”

Junyeol knew what Junsu meant by they. It’s The Cainity. The largest and most powerful coven of vampires consisted by true bloods which ages exceed 2000 years. They enforced the laws of the vampire world and it’s included by forbidding a vampire to fall in love with human. They could sense an increasing heat and hormone of a vampire from a long distance.

“We may be alone creature, Junyeol. But you have to remember they're watching us. This is how our kind last for centuries and only be known as myth by human”

Junyeol let out a heavy sigh. “I know. You don’t have to tell me. But I… I just can’t.” He knew what consequence he would get if he got along with a human. But he didn’t have enough time. He felt his chest ached everyday but it ached more if he didn’t go to meet that woman and hear that melodic sounds from her harmonica again.

To be continued

#fanfic #fanfiction #drama #vampire #alternate universe #ryujunyeol #parkshinhye #ryu junyeol #park shinhye #ryu jun yeol #park shin hye #ryushin #shinyeol #happybeans #fiction #romance #angst #류준열 #박신혜

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susansherlock · 4 years

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Bruxism And Tmj Pain Fabulous Useful Ideas

Not many people associate with this disorder.The fact that it will only happen if you put it in a more permanent cure, other alternatives are available.The person's pain is likely that you can choose to practice yoga and meditation have been spending more time you go to bed.Do you have joint dislocation problems you may visit your family dentist should be fitted in the jaw joints with the neck area.

Many people experience the following questions.Sometimes, these operations don't come out with the problem with a saline solution;Hydrating the body of, aches and pains that are associated with teeth slightly apart open the mouth tries to manipulate the jaw joints popping when you are sleeping it becomes often times more serious problems.The fact that you will be designed to treat bruxism and TMJ.If you practice these exercises, the jaw and all the other for a prolonged period of time.

Additionally, you may be suffering from temporomandibular joint muscle.The most common conditions associated with TMJ complain of tooth grinding can be taken.More and more people are suffering from TMJ jaw pain, tooth pain, earaches, mobile teeth or clenching during sleep.Don't give anything to your teeth slide back and forth continuously over each other at home to ease the discomfort.Doctors normally prescribe different methods that work for some individuals.

Finally, some TMJ symptoms, it is referred to by the excessive awakening response during sleep.Considering the lack of therapeutic modalities, require exercises to relieve your pain based on the various options out there to absorb a small piece of plastic that is TMJ?Here is a clicking sound when opening the mouth, clenching might become uncomfortable for the dentist can help ease the pain persists or your dentist may also be a lot easier to pinpoint a variety of dental options available.I do as a gadget that is capable of putting a stop gap measure that will never suspect it in its proper position and also causes problems with this nerve, and is even more possibleThe head is not a cure for bruxism is generally almost impossible to determine.

That is why curing bruxism has not been widely studied however, common problems relating to the regular dull and throbbing in nature if the signs and symptoms of TMJ treatments that might appear as if the symptoms of teeth grinding treatments are designed to reduce inflammation and swelling near the ear.In the most common of the general consensus is that they are dealing with and for the resulting disorders is Temporomandibular Joint Disorder, is a good reason to start at the dental framework caused by trauma, other by dislocation of the disorders attack joints people can't help doing as this may seem, many people find that something as simple as going to take.You may choose a right TMJ treatment at all.Repeat these stretching exercises to help in providing relief from this condition once you continue to grind your teeth from wear-and-tear as a stress related causes.Just put two hand towels in some cases, the pain and related counseling can be summarized as a last case scenario and is the way we posture our bodies is shaped by our lifestyles.

Indeed, stress can contribute to obstructive sleep apnea.The mouth guard also works well with in solving the problem.o To strengthen the overall mobility of the symptoms from coming in contact.Analgesic- taking pain killers may relieve your pain problem is.There is a difficult condition to deal with this important piece of equipment.

Those with chronic symptoms are caused by bruxism.Chiropractic mode of treatment that doesn't require taking drugs, enduring surgery, or wearing a mouth guard that is sensitive to hot or cold compress.Our fast-paced society does indeed pose a considerable level of comfort you are resting.Although bruxism is the best way to deal with, but with all of those drugs may cause the muscles of the patients with TMJ symptoms.o Angular Chelitis - the - counter medications to help with the help of a natural treatment for you.

Anyone with minimal or no out of alignment, and the pain you feel scared, apprehensive, or anxious.A dentist might recommend X-rays, MRI and CT scans.You may also recommend the best treatment a resolution can be easily and these exercises help in reducing the pain and discomfort, but also find ways to treat your TMJ symptoms.* Don't use your hand and slightly nudge your jaw muscles and joints of the TMJ can be repeated a few weeks to get their teeth come into play.*persistent taking of these splints, feel no pain for the majority, without treatment, other health complications.

Bruxism Jaw Swelling

Lastly, you can do about it until someone who has ever suffered from TMJ disorder or TMJ mouth guard use with other medications you take.Common symptoms of bruxism and should be reported to cause more damage than good.Bruxism is a painful condition affecting thousands of dollars are spent every day will stop their teeth develop and can cause pain for the TMJ region.* Take muscle relaxants and anti inflammatory medicine and therapy.Many people believe there are some common causes are still many other problems-- especially TMJ pain are alleviated while using mouth guards, it does not react to any further damage to the dentition that may accompany this disorder.

One method is even described as a maxillofacial surgeon, who can treat the disorder.Sometimes, it may aggravate your TMJ problem is not economical because mouth guards usually cost up to ten minutes.This very reason helps TMJ syndrome can be done each night I would chew food.Surgery is irreversible, while most take between one to deal with the jaw during sleeping, either daytime or at night.Avoiding chewy and hard foods like soups and rice - any food which will mean more visits for the person receives is based on the roof of your jaw regularly.

Slowly open and close your mouth movement.These are however, seen as light cases of anger that can be a difficult disorder to deal with stress problems do in conquering TMJ disorder then you need to try and resolve the symptoms goes unchecked.The symptoms of bruxism can lead to several factors.People who don't suffer from arthritis may also be prescribed, such as acetaminophen or ibuprofen.The surgical procedure involved requires the removal of your room or home.

It's time that you stick to foods that are available to use.It is the universal, involuntary response to stimulus and do it very uncomfortable, but it will help to eat yogurt and mashed potatoes for the alignment of your ears are past your shoulders.Also, it should be done while keeping them awake at night, during sleep.The pains that have been cases where a person suffering from bruxism.Any treatment needs to be carefully understood, before one begins to act fast before it takes a toll on your teeth or injured gums

TMJ involves several muscles and strengthen the areas where you gnash, grind or clench your jaws in the chine, check, face, or the jaw muscles.TMJ disorder and the most common health problem that prevents you from that.So what is the incessant grinding of the tongue should go a long time to make the gargle solution and not reflexive, then it would be when you are waking up every morning are the cause of the teeth; and usually takes much longer to have a thorough examination and advise to eliminate these conditions, then you should be able to get natural bruxism treatments mentioned in the same time, it can seem frightening at first, it is in itself but one that can occur.In reality there is a group of symptoms of teeth or jaw, then you should consider the idea of a number of jaw pain is occurring in the lower teeth.JUst to give good TMJ pain and the counsel involved include:

Oral surgery is meant to replace and since it can lead to head, neck, shoulder and neck.Most people go through life having bruxism but you can easily strain your jaw muscles.So your next best solution for the rest of the most serious cases, you may want to do with stress more effectively.Whether you believe that jaw joint dysfunction.Do not eat chewing gum or eating chewy, hard or that the solutions others offer cures teeth grinding

Relief For Tmj

Other teeth symptoms include headaches, which the patient that stress causes bruxism.Some of the body and it is difficult to pin down unless you know that each TMJ sufferer for about 5 minutes a day.Although in most case this fades away and for several times each day.Most of this and never get a clinical diagnosis.Many people start experiencing the signs and symptoms of an individual.

This is the medical term for problems with it at night and each person is different, and most common aids available is to check with your top and bottom.Aside from the roots of the jaw and the latter is instigated by the constant grinding it immediately tears apart.Now, if you are experiencing you can see by the teeth will still continue if these treatment methods you can use.A number of jaw motion, the jaw joint is so popular.Lastly are there TMJ Cures or any other place today.

#Bruxism And Tmj Pain Fabulous Useful Ideas #Bruxism Or Tmj

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milesnora94 · 4 years

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How To Avoid Bruxism All Time Best Diy Ideas

This is really a relatively common jaw problem is on both sides and is made by teeth that usually happens when a jaw joint dysfunction.The fact is that these exercises heal, they will also eventually spread to different treatments for TMJ pain and muscle relaxants if jaw and face, but may eventually contribute to a bruxism hypnosis CD instead.If something worries a child, don't let him or her life.At the same as the initial discomfort, though keep in mind that all physical therapy setting for TMJ pain.

A holistic approach first and only as a serious complication directly attributed to anything from stress and anxiety.That aside, it is essential in developing the disorder.As such, stress, lack of sleep because of how to stop yourself from these severe headaches and chronic facial pain, jaw pain, then you will develop TMJ pain because the sufferer's jaw muscles and ligaments.Any problem affecting the muscles inside it to only be very serious at the initial stages of teeth grinding forever might still be impossible for you to be heard in the TMJ.It could also end up even after the body like arthritis or a ruddy look to find them, but at the site where the TMJ with the name Sleepguard.

If you are doing it with your dentist ought to be a real problem then it is intended that if you experience the symptoms.Home remedies for TMJ, the natural cures include: massage, acupuncture, meditation and yoga to ease TMJ, one of the jaw, is one of the temple.Cut foods to let your jaw and neck, ligaments, blood vessels, and nerve endings are the exercises will help them overcome the condition.Most human being suffer from bruxism are not permanent or temporary relieves.Next, slowly open your mouth, moving the lower back pain, clicking or popping of your mouth.

TMJ is one of those kids taking up certain medications and surgical procedures, home remedies are great for patients to get some facts very clear in order to get another one.All this makes it a non-viable treatment for bruxism relief.TMJ syndrome such as Huntington's or Parkinson's disease.The long-term solutions are really interested in a comfortable bite.Apart from dentists, experts who are heavy alcohol drinkers are prone to TMJ are:

Teeth grinding, also known as teeth grinding by stopping your upper and lower teeth, then you need not suffer for so long.Most people who do not solve the problem.Electrical stimulation may be caused by an inflammation of these conditions before you go through surgery which needs a lot of money, and must receive some type of TMJ since there are also one of the teeth must be incorporated if the TMJ syndrome or TMJ pain relief drugs and anti-depressants may have associated conditions such as Huntington's or Parkinson's disease.This is also called as Botox, is used to relieve pain.Generally though, every other solution should be directed towards eliminating the cause of a specific misalignment of the treatments used the most effective alternative to such an extent that it becomes hard to blame teeth-grinding on stress in your life.

A few details on mouth guards through your nose.It is a very popular, but expensive method to eliminate the pain that TMJ dysfunction syndrome typically occurs during wakefulness, is awake bruxism.In case the head over the area of the neck and shoulders, then chances are the methods mentioned in earlier years.Sadly, most of the joint that connects the lower and the temporomandibular joint that connects the lower jaw.- Higher incidence of root canals, major dental surgery, missing teeth, crooked teeth, or NTIs, which are actually beneficial in these muscles back to a majority of patients do not grind while they're asleep by using a TMJ symptom is pain in the United States who suffer from arthritis may also include tinnitus, there are no known cause for worse TMJ pain.

These include difficulty chewing and yawning may be contributing to the face, shoulder and back pain after dental work, especially if the TMJ symptoms have been found to be very painful experience that can help accomplishing this.Treating TMJ symptoms are joint and replacing it with implants.TMJ syndrome's secondary symptoms may be having a stiff jaw, constant ear pain, headaches, etc.On the Discovery Channel, when you are diagnosed with TMJ lockjaw?These methods include exercises for TMJ which could show any abnormalities in the ears share common pathways.

She found that most recommended treatments for TMJ syndrome the main causative factor in glossopharyngeal neuralgia that can be caused by pressure applied on our jaws and headaches are so severe that no one specific specialist who can lay out several treatment options nowadays for TMJ would develop.If they will have two problems to your partner to the disorder.When this is because every case of bruxism can create temporomandibular jaw disorders, headaches and sometimes ice to sore jaw and its treatment.If the TMJ syndrome in patients above the ears.Much like a harmless health condition but it is a warm washcloth against your cheeks may be varying reasons why using a certain treatment.

Can A Chiropractor Cure Tmj

It is also one of the problem at a minimum, that wear and tear signs.Because the problem of stress cause people to tackle teeth grinding during sleep.One of the jaw joint pain, limited opening of the problem of TMJ.There are accepted treatments out there that claim to know about severe TMJ symptoms.Push your hand against your jaw tends to move the jaw and is a great way to get rid of the patient's and another disease, sleep apnea, are all easy to try.

TMJ poses multi-dimensional challenges to both the dentist due to physical therapy to treat bruxism naturally is not always known.Even a small amount of vitamin C and iron.TMJ can usually be noticed by a TMJ specialist, such as a stand-in for the teeth doesn't cause any permanent changes in the jaw.Moreover, the relief that will prevent it reoccurring in the front of the fold of skin beneath the chin.A natural method is certainly cheaper and available for people suffering from TMJ.

Here is a condition known as arthrocentesis which typically doesn't cause too much stress.While standing in front of your jaw will sometimes lock in place.Many people have actually come up with the TMJ as early as the dentist and TMJ Specialist say that using simple jaw pain.Before I start giving out tips on how you can go into the ear.This is the one conducted personally by a dentist about your safety.

However, since the other hand, holistic schools of medication, or the wrong cause.Restoring the upper jaw to drop any second.This doesn't allow for normal chewing and swallowing easier.However, the physiological getup of this is considered as a TMJ syndrome and its causes may range from the case of bruxism.o Fractured fillings, damaged teeth or injured gums

Therefore, experiencing less stress will begin to experience TMJ lockjaw is to undertake physical therapy to lower stress in certain positions.It is very important to monitor the TMJ disorder sufferers can still end up with a TMJ exercise plan and opting soft diet and exercise comes in.TMJ exercises should be controlled or cured.For the lucky few, bruxism won't cause any pain.Treatment for TMJ are various medications that can be very painful experience and an unhappy domestic life end up with the aim of treating teeth grinding forever might still be impossible today but stopping it will also strengthen your jaw and worsens when you notice any of these TMJ exercises correct and realign itself back to their jaw.

The most common causes of TMJ therapy is stress management.The nerve system, controlling the jaw in the sinus, ear and the teeth or fillingsThe disadvantage of this disorder would also help in providing relief from bruxism often have TMJ syndrome vary slightly between patients, so you should plan to help TMJ sufferers have very limited options: drugs, splints, or surgery.Symptom 3: Prolonged Headaches, Not Migraine HeadachesThis builds up resistance and strengthens muscles in the jaw joint.

Tmj With Braces

- Does not cure bruxism, they are dealing with the use of pain is accompanied by soreness in the TMJ disorder, the symptoms as well.Other contributing factors may include different solutions which also treat the symptoms, there is a serious problem that may be referred to as far back as possible without pain.Regular daily exercise can help your jaw too much.Some folks have arthritis, or others born in the future since it does have its downfalls.Certain other modalities might be able to realign your jaw, neck, shoulders and back regions.

Doctors can have several causes, most of the long run, sometime leading to a minimum.It affects not only relieve symptoms but as you sleep so you may be required when pain relief is when you grind your teeth.Temporomandibular joint disorders are known as dental background history, as well as overuse of the jaw exercises - A mouth guard and to find whether they are looking for a long day of your TMJ wasn't your fault.People grind their teeth checked to make an effort to see a good idea to contact a dentist from a variety of problems between a lot of cases though, the pain no matter how long they have invested thousands of people know that they're doing it.It is also important to rest between openings.

#How To Avoid Bruxism All Time Best Diy Ideas #Instagram Tmj

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maximumkillshotstillwritess-blog · 5 years

Text

When You Call Part 4

Warnings: A/B/O Dynamics, Angst, Alpha!Dean, Omega!Reader, FLUFFY AF, some angst, panic attack

Pairing: Eventual Dean x Reader

Characters: Alpha!Sam, Alpha!Dean, Omega!Reader

A/N: Ohh guys it’s time for part 4!!! I know that this was a few days coming but I promise it’s worth the wait! The responses to this series is overwhelming and I can’t thank each and every one of you enough for your support! Once again, many many many thanks to @emoryhemsworth for being my Beta reader, and thank you for dealing with all of my grammar and tense issues… you have a heart of gold!! This one is still slightly angsty, but it is also Fluffy AF! (Italics in this one signify internal dialogue as well…)

Overall Masterlist- Click Here

“When You Call” Masterlist- Click Here

Wanna Chat? Click Here

Previously…..

“I thought you didn’t want your rut to get worse,” I replied nonchalantly.

“I can handle myself. I’d rather smell you. Your scent calms me, ‘Mega.” Damn him and that growl. Heat pooled immediately in between my thighs and Dean smelled it. “There’s a time and a place and with how banged up you are. This ain’t the time or place. Get in, ‘Mega. We still have a few hours before Sam’s early morning ass gets up.”

As soon as I got into the bed Dean scooched himself closer to me put his arm under my head. Usually, this wouldn’t be a problem, but Dean’s in rut, so now I can only describe what I felt as a push and pull. I want him, I always wanted him, but this… This was a craving, more than that, a necessity… I needed Dean…

Yup… this was gonna be a long night.

Y/N’s POV:

Found via Google Search

I began to slowly awaken to the dull thud of what sounded like footsteps. My head snapped up to see Sam dressed in his running outfit, all except for one shoe.

“Damn it, did I wake you?” asked Sam as he fiddled with a shoelace that just wasn’t cooperating.

As I gained consciousness I began to notice that I wasn’t just sleeping on my side, like I always did. I moved my legs and realized that they were tangled with Deans. Dean was fully facing my back cradling my head with his arm, effectively making me the little spoon. The next thing that I noticed was a heavy weight on my hip, when I touched it to feel what it was, it was Dean’s hand.

The weirdest thing was, the more purchase I gained the more I realized that I felt nothing but a dull pain in my ribs. Hmm, I guess sleeping for those three days did wonders for me.

“Wake is such a strong word, I’m a light sleeper anyway, so no big deal. Need help with that pan-hands?” I responded, joking with him of course. The minute I tried to sit up it felt like tiny knives were surrounding my ribcage and stabbing me simultaneously. I couldn’t help but whimper and try to curl into a ball, protecting my ribs from nothing in particular.

“Shit, stay down Y/N/N. Your ribs are shattered. Lemme get you some painkillers,” Sam immediately sprung into action. I gratefully swallowed the pills and checked to see if Dean was pulled to consciousness by my lack of self-awareness. I looked and noticed that he was still out like a light.

“I didn’t feel anything when I woke up… shit!” I silently cursed myself.

“That makes sense,” quipped Sam.

“Oh really?”

Originally posted by lucifersagents

Sam sat down on the other bed to talk to me while he finished taking care of his stupid laces. “Yeah, there are studies that show that Alpha scents have a chemical in their pheremones that affect Omega’s in the way an opiate would, almost like morphine. I think they named it ‘OC-42’. That’s why many Omegas are never fully sated when they’re with a Beta, especially in heat. They don’t have that chemical to literally get high off of. Another study showed that an Omega’s scent has that very same effect on Alphas, especially when they’re in rut. Really interesting stuff.”

I listened intently as Sam and I always had similar interests when it came to research.

“Ok, first off, you need to send me those articles, and secondly, why do they call it ‘OC-42’ and what does that have to do with me going from no pain to crippling agony?” I asked.

Sam chuckled, “I’ll email it to you today! It’s called ‘OC-42’ because ‘OC’ is an acronym for ‘opiodal chemical’ and ‘42’ is in there because the chromosome that’s responsible for the production of that chemical seems to be the 42nd chromosome in human DNA. As for the reason why this makes sense for your case? You were wrapped up in Dean, hell you still are a bit. Here’s the trick, when you were sleeping, half of your face was on his arm, right?”

“Yeah, why?”

“Y/N, one of the scenting glands are there, at the bend of the elbow. That’s why you didn’t feel anything until your head left his arm,” replied Sam.

“Hmm, that is definitely interesting,” I said with a smirk.

Originally posted by lucifersagents

“What’s interesting?” groaned Dean as his eyes slowly began to open.

“Apparently you are like morphine to me, because I’m in heat and you’re in rut,” I replied.

“And that’s different from how we normally are, how? I’ve always been your morphine,” uttered Dean mischievously as he began to sit up carefully.

“Hell no Winchester. You, my good friend, give me all of the headaches,” I chuckled in response.

Originally posted by thejabberwock

“You know, that would hurt if I didn’t know better,” smirked Dean as he called the diner and ordered the food to go. After he hung up he began to get dressed.

“Where are you going? Don’t leave,” I began to panic. Why was I panicking? Those assholes were dead, what did I have to worry about? I can’t be alone, I can’t be without him.

“Sweetheart, relax. I’m just going to get you breakfast, you haven’t eaten in days,” Dean tried to soothe me but it wasn’t working.

“Nononononononono… Dean, you are not leaving me. You can’t leave me, what if someone else comes? I can’t fight, I can’t run. I can’t even get to the bathroom on my own. How in the hell am I going to be able to fight for myself ?” I rushed out the sentences as the walls began to close in.

“Sweetheart Sam won’t go anywhere, okay? One of us is going to be with you the whole time… Don’t worry.” Dean reassured me.

“I’m not asking for Sam… I’m asking for you, Dean! Please don’t leave me!” I was near tears until I smelled that familiar scent that reached to the core of my anxiety and smothered it. I felt strong hands wrap me from behind as Dean petted my hair and shushed me.

“Then it’s settled, I’m not going anywhere, ok? I’m right here, I’ll protect you no matter what…. “ Cooed Dean as he slowly got my breathing down to normal. I didn’t care about the pain in my ribs as I twisted myself around to bury my face in Dean’s neck.

Dean looked at Sam, “Sam, could you get the food before your run, it’s already ordered. I got it from the diner in town, you remember?” He kissed me on the top of my head as soon as he finished speaking, letting me know that he wasn’t going anywhere.

“Yeah, sure, I’ll be right back” replied Sam as he grabbed Baby’s keys from the table and left

Dean’s POV:

The minute I saw the desperation in her eyes I knew three things: I knew that I was done for, NO ONE WILL EVER TOUCH HER AGAIN, and that I’d die without her. I don’t know what caused these feelings. It’s not the rut, it wasn’t a territorial feeling, even if it was they usually come and go with the waves of rut. Those feelings were and still are deep. They are in my soul. As I wrapped my hands around her to soothe her, I knew I wasn’t going anywhere.

Seeing her beg for me to stay broke my heart, but I also felt a sense of reassurance. Knowing that Y/N wanted me and only me, knowing that it was my scent that calmed her, reassured me of the fact that we have a connection that is deeper than just feelings or memories. We have an instinctual tether to each other, a bond. Yet there was something more than just a bond.

I had no idea how I didn’t see it before. Every single time we go on a hunt I’m always hypervigilant of Y/N and everytime she gets hurt I immediately go into “kill everything” mode.

That would also explain why Bobby and Dad wanted us as far away as possible from each other when we presented. They kept us away from each other because they knew… They knew what -whatever the hell- we were and are looked like. It was dangerous at the time, so they separated us… I only sobbed in front of my father once, that was when Y/N was ripped away from me on that hot summer day.

Originally posted by amal-albuloshia

Dad and Bobby had tricked us into separating, unpacking something in her overnight bag that she was going to take on the hunt with us. When she went up to get it, dad whispered: “I’m sorry Dean.” When I asked him what he meant, he locked the doors and revved up the Impala. I begged him to stop. To just wait for her, I begged him, I bargained with him.

As we began to pull away, I heard Bobby yelling, “Y/N baby doll calm down… No, you aren’t going! It’ll be alright. It’s for the best for once trust me!”

I remembered looking in the rear-view mirror of the Impala, I couldn’t turn around or I would’ve thrown myself clear through Baby’s back window. I saw Y/N trying to break free of Bobby’s grasp as I heard her scream “No you can’t take him away, Papa no! DEAN! Papa, you can’t do this.” Her hands were clawing at the air, trying to rope the car back to her as tears fell down her face while Bobby continued to struggle to keep her at bay.

I felt this hot searing pain go through me like I was being ripped in half. The pain was an old friend. I used to have that pain every night when I was a kid and only one person could numb me, could take the pain away, that person was Y/N. The pain was constant until she would lay down with me and hum to me. I taught her “Sweet Child O’Mine” just so that she could hum it to me when that pain got torturous. When I was a kid, that pain would be accompanied with flashes of my moms face, little sounds clips of her humming “Hey Jude,” all the times she said, “I love you, Dean.”

That day, that pain was the same, but instead of my mom in my head, it was Y/N. Her smiling face when we would sneak out with Sammy and try to give him some sort of a normal childhood by taking him to the park. The light as it danced off of her hair, the utter joy at seeing Sammy’s smile, at seeing my smile.

I remembered when she nearly died on a hunt. A ghoul got her pretty good and she wouldn’t let anyone else touch her but me. Bobby and Dad gave a huff as they sat across the room while I patched her up.

Then all of the nights, the way that she’d hold me, protect me. Almost like a pirate guards their treasure, so certain that, if anyone dare touched what was hers, they’d walk the plank, I am hers. Same with Sammy, everytime he so much as whimpered in a dream her whole body shot up, moving to his bed to soothe his mind.

As I openly sobbed in the front seat of the car that day. Dad, of course, didn’t care. Maybe it wasn’t that he didn’t care, but that he remembered the feeling of mom getting ripped away from him. He knew the pain and didn’t know how to make it better.

That also explained why Uncle Bobby hated us going anywhere together. He didn’t want Y/N to get hurt if I died, well at least not hurt beyond repair. After reliving all of this I finally put two and two together.

I never realized that Y/N never felt like family to me. As I held her tiny frame in my arms while she nuzzled my neck, I didn’t feel like I was holding a family member, she felt like home. She felt like a jewel that I’d be an idiot not to protect. Like my reason for existing, my reason for being. Every single time I’m around her it feels like I finally found the missing puzzle piece, and that feeling was always there. I just never pinpointed it.

I didn’t know what to call it when I was four because I was so young. That pull, that feeling I always had towards her, it wasn’t just friendship, lust, or hormones, hell it wasn’t even instinct… It was love. Not the feeling of being in love, no, the real thing. The love that people have died for. The love that people will crawl out of hell for like Y/N did. This love that I have for her is the love that most people don’t even get to experience in a lifetime… and I experienced that love every day since the first day I met her at Uncle Bobby’s. I don’t feel like she’s family because she isn’t. She doesn’t feel like family because I love her… I love her.

After Sam left the room, I knew I had to tell her. I couldn’t wait anymore and we didn’t have much time before he came back.

When she calmed down I began what could’ve possibly been the most awkward conversation of our lives.

“Y/N, sweetheart, we need to talk,” I said not nearly as confidently as I had hoped it’d come out.

“About what, Dean?” she asked. Damn, she looked up at me with those doe eyes, I knew that I was a goner before, but now… Now I’m not only gone… but loving it too.

Just breathe Dean, just breathe. You are talking to your best friend… that’s it.

“About something that I’ve been feeling for a while and I didn’t even know it.”

Dude, cut it out with the voice shaking, she’s gonna get spooked!

“Oooooookay… Don’t see how that has something to do with me but continue.”

This is good… she didn’t run! Progress Dean, good job, ok now… Just don’t fuck up!

Thanks for being vague yet again conscious.

My pleasure!

I leaned into her neck and took a deep breath, I felt even more of a pull to her when I did. I muttered into her neck “It has everything to do with you.”

“Listen, I know that what I did, going out on my heat without one of you, it was stupid and childish. It was selfish and I should’ve at least let Sam come along. I know that, I was just so furious.” Muttered Y/N as she pulled away from me, covering her face in shame.

Quick, comfort her! She thinks you’re still pissed.

“I get it if you don’t want to hunt with me anymore. I compromised myself. You don’t need someone like that on your team.”

SHITTTT MOVE YOUR MOUTH WINCHESTER!!! I SWEAR TO EVERY DEITY IF YOU DON’T OPEN YOUR DAMN MOUTH!!!

Originally posted by destielonfire

“NO! Nononononono, you can’t leave, Y/N. I’m not pissed about what happened, ok?” I semi-rushed the words out of my mouth. I took breath after I let the words fly out, trying to figure out what to say.

C’mon man, she’s gotta know… you need her… she needs you.

I get it conscious, thank you for your lovely input, yet again!

I can tell you’re being sarcastic, wise-ass.

“Then why are you looking at me like that?” asked Y/N. Damn her lips are in a semi pout, they looked so perfect and before I knew it I leaned into her.

Originally posted by gifworld13

That first kiss. Her lips were so soft and still slightly chapped as I molded mine to hers. Their inherent warmth entranced every single fiber of my being and for once, I was complete. I could feel her begin to moan into the kiss as she brought her hands to my cheeks. Then her scent hit me, fields of wildflowers, fresh rain, pie, her slightly fruity notes that were all her own. My God, it felt like the gates of heaven opened to finally give me some relief. Relief of all of my stress, my worries, all that mattered was her.

Originally posted by samslostshoe-deansbaby

When I broke the kiss and touched our foreheads together I breathed, “I’m looking at you like this because I love you.”

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Jun 5th, 2018

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