#harper i see as being an occasional thing where it never becomes serious but the two make out every once in a while and theyre CHAOS | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

topazy · 3 years

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Silent bloom

Pairings: Finn Collins/reader

Warning: mentions vomiting blood.

Chapter: 1.10

"The Exodus ship?"

"Wait. Something is wrong."

"Clarke shouldn't be out here."

You nodded in agreement with Finn. Looking at the hazardous destruction in front of you, it wasn’t surprising to find there were no survivors. You know that, but a couple of kids back in camp had false hope that someone would have survived.

Raven turned to face you and Finn. "Her mom was on the ship. She's looking for answers. You want to help her. Find me the black box, hard drives, anything that will explain why this ship crashed."

Raven walked off to look among the rumble, while you looked around, concerned that you were being watched. "What’s wrong?"

What wasn’t wrong? Clarke was falling apart, Raven hated you, and Finn refused to talk to you. Now Bellamy was staring at you with a worried look on his face. "I don’t think we are the only ones out here. Think how loud that explosion was. No way were we the only ones who heard it."

Bellamy gulped down, and looked at the group behind him. "Stay sharp. Grounder retaliation for what happened on the bridge is coming, just a matter of when."

"Can you blame them?" Finn scoffed.

As Finn and Bellamy started bickering, you wondered off, not having the energy to listen to them. You walked past Clarke and gave her a sympathetic smile before spotting something interesting. It was a pink, smelly liquid. You stepped closer to it when the shouting stopped you.

"Daisy, stop!"

Raven rushed over to you, "is it rocket fuel?"

"Hydrazine," she replied. "Highly unstable in its non-solid form. If this stuff meets fire, we're all pink mist." Raven picked up a large stone and threw it into the liquid, causing it to make a small explosion. "We need to clear this area!"

"Okay, then." Bellamy stepped forward. "We move in formation, no straggling, weapons hot. We gotta get back before dark."

—

The walk back to camp was mostly in silence. The only occasional chatter was between Raven and Clarke. A sigh of relief passed your lips when you saw Monty running to meet you at the gates.

"What’s wrong?" You asked, noticing the expression on his face.

"Murphy, he’s back. He’s inside the drop-ship."

Bellamy, Clarke, and Finn rushed towards the drop-ship, while you and Raven stayed behind. The brunette was carrying samples from the crash site, while you just needed a moment. You pulled Monty into a hug, and squeezed him tightly. Pulling back, you smiled. The past couple of days have made you grateful for the people you care about still being alive.

As you walked towards the drop-ship, you could hear Bellamy’s voice getting louder. "Help us? We hung him. We banished him, and now we're gonna kill him. Get the hell out of my way."

Bellamy stared at you when he noticed you walking towards them. You expected him to say something, anything to explain why he wanted to kill Murphy. You shook your head in disappointment, "you can’t be serious? We don’t kill our own."

Clarke stepped beside you, "Finn and Daisy are right."

"Like hell they are," Bellamy snapped back. "Clarke, think about Charlotte."

"I am thinking about her, but what happened to Charlotte was as much our fault as his. He's not lying. His fingernails were torn off. They tortured him."

As Clarke spoke, you kneeled down to see for yourself. Unlike the others in the room, you felt sorry for Murphy. He didn’t deserve to be tortured. His fingernails had been pulled off. How cruel. To your surprise, Murphy spoke to you in a low voice, "I-I never tried to hurt you."

"I know," you sighed. "I was Charlotte."

Being so focused on Murphy, you nearly missed the conversation happening behind you. "You and the Grounders should compare notes."

Rolling your eyes, you stood up again. "Not now Finn, we don’t have time for this. The grounders are coming and arguing among ourselves is exactly what they want." You ignored the glare Finn shot at you. "I’m going for a walk. You guys are giving me a headache. Murphy better be alive when I get back."

—

"You know what? This is my tent, okay? Bellamy gave it to me, and if you have a problem with that, maybe you should find somewhere else to sleep."

The venom in Jasper's voice took you by surprise. You had never heard him argue with anyone before, let alone his best friend.

"Maybe I should."

You cleared your throat to alert them to your presence, before opening the flaps of the tent. "Hi guys, either of you care to join me for a walk."

Monty was still staring at Jasper, "I will."

"Good."

—

You and Monty walked around camp four times before he told you what the argument with Jasper was about, and truthfully, you were pissed. Jasper was changing and not for the better. You had a theory that his referring to Harper as' ‘low hanging fruit’ offended Monty.

"Is Finn talking to you yet?"

You shake your head, "nope. I did it to protect him and Clarke, but he didn’t want to hear it."

"Well... maybe it’s for the best Daze. I mean, he slept with you while still dating Raven." You stopped walking and faced him. Monty was one of your closest friends and would never tell you anything out of badness. "I just mean you deserve better Daisy. He’s still with Raven, and flirts with Clarke. The distance might do you some good."

You smiled, "you're so sweet, you know that? I hope the girls here get over Jasper acting like a jackass and realise who the real hero is."

Monty opened his but froze and pointed at your head. "Daisy your ear, it’s bleeding!"

You cupped your ear and felt the warm liquid against your palm. Oh shit.

"Do you still have a headache?" You nodded. "We need to find Clarke."

You started to walk towards the drop-ship and noticed how busy it looked. The sudden feeling of nausea washed over you, as your chest became heavy. Your coughing became worse before you started to throw up blood. Everything started to go hazy, as the only thing you could make out was yelling around you.

"Finn, don’t touch her!"

—

You awoke to feel a hard thumping on your back, as you lay on your front. "Wh..what..." you struggled to talk. "Where am I?"

The thumping stopped as Octavia quickly appeared in front of you. "You're in the drop-ship. Murphy turned you over because you were choking."

"Choking? On what?" You asked groggy.

"Blood," she squeezed your hands. "You passed out and Finn carried you inside before leaving to help Raven blow up the bridge."

You closed your eyes and were too exhausted to reply. Octavia said she and Murphy would keep an eye on you. Hours must have passed when you woke up. You sat up feeling slightly better.

You glanced across the room to see Murphy trying to offer Bellamy a drink of water. "Bellamy, you're sick, okay? I'm just trying to help. Here."

You sighed and walked towards them. You do your best to ignore the terrible smells and blood around you.

"When I get better, if you're still here-" Bellamy frowned when he saw you. "Why are you up? You should be resting."

"I’ve got this one Murphy," you smiled and took the cup from his hand. "Thanks for saving my life and all that."

Murphy grumped out a ‘no problem’ before walking away.

You sat down next to Bellamy, as she pouted. "What are you doing now? His best friend? After-"

"Murphy is an ass," you cut him off. "But he never hurt me, and I believe in second chances."

Bellamy took a drink of water before you started wiping some of the blood off his face. He stared at you so intensely that it made you almost uncomfortable. You could have wanted to say something but were holding back. "Something you want to talk about?"

"You and Finn-" He was cut off by a loud noise from outside the ship. Bellamy sat up as Clarke ran into the room, "They did it."

"I am becoming a death destroyer of worlds." You raised your eyebrows listening to her talk. "It's Oppenheimer, the man who built the first--"

Bellamy stood up, "I know who Oppenheimer is."

"Who cares about him?" you interrupted. "I want to know what the hell caused the explosion."

"Raven..." Bellamy glanced down at you. "I thought O told you? Raven and Finn went to blow up the bridge to slow the grounders down."

Oh. The plan sounded extremely reckless and dangerous, but if anybody could pull off a stunt like that, it was Raven Reyes.

—

You stood outside Raven’s tent pacing back and forth. Your relationship with the brunette wasn’t good, but you were friends once, and you hoped overtime she would forgive you.

"What?"

The sound of Finn’s voice caused you to freeze on the spot. You didn’t realise he was inside the tent as well. Trying to fix things with her suddenly felt so wrong.

"When Bellamy asked who was gonna take it, you hesitated."

"It's what people do when they're considering something that might blow them up, right?"

You turned to walk away, not feeling right about listening in on a private conversation, but stopped when you heard your name being said.

"Daze...You didn't hesitate when she was falling. You knew she had the virus, but you caught her, anyway."

"Raven..."

You could hear the break in Raven’s voice as she spoke. "You didn't hesitate."

"Raven, I love you."

Hearing Finn say those words to someone else made you break inside. Tears spilled from your ears as you clasped a hand over your mouth so they could hear. He wasn’t yours to love, but you still did. And you hate yourself.

"Not the way that I want to be loved." Raven continued. "Not the way that you love Daisy. It's over, Finn."

You walked backwards, being careful not to trip over any of the ropes stuck in the ground. You put your head down low when you saw Bellamy walking towards the gate. You prayed he hadn’t noticed you. The last thing you wanted was for anyone to see you cry.

The minute you entered your tent, more tears began to spill down your cheeks. You jumped, feeling a pair of arms wrap around you, "O?"

"I overheard them as well," she confessed.

"Raven was my friend...Now they have split up, I have no idea how to fix it."

Octavia sighed, "regardless of how this works out, you always have me, you know that?"

You nodded, "I know. And I’ll always have your back O, no matter what."

Season one

#the 100 #finn collins #Bellamy Blake #finn collins/oc #finn collins/reader #finn collins x reader #slow romance #slow burn #bellamy the 100 #the 100 fandom #the 100 fanfiction #clarke griffin #octavia blake #grounders #monty green #jasper jordan #raven reyes

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catxsnow · 4 years

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NO MORE J.T.

Summary: You and Jason had been in the hero game a long for a long time, but maybe there was still time for something different

Warning: I don’t really think anything FLUFFFFFF

A/N: soft Jason > everything else

Word count: 2k

GIF not mine

You had known Jason for a long time.

Long enough that he trusted you with his secrets. Long enough to know the truth about his past. Long enough to know what he was going to do before he put his thoughts into action. You knew Jason Todd better than you knew yourself and that was something you had always been proud of.

He was the kind of guy that didn't like to share what he was thinking or feelings and yet you had broken his walls down enough to know everything there was about him. He trusted you with his life, his feelings, he trusted you. And you never proved him wrong to break that trust, never.

You knew him from being a hero, just like him. The two of you met on an accidental team up and figured out that maybe you worked well enough together that you should keep the partnership. It started off without knowing each others identities, meeting up far enough from your homes so that the other wouldn't find out who you really were.

You didn't mind it that way. You could tell him whatever the hell you wanted and have no repercussions in your every day life. He became your own personal therapist without even knowing it. Hard day at work? He knew about it. Family driving you nuts? He helped you through it, god knows he had enough family issues of his own to know a thing or two.

Your real name slipped out the one day, you hadn't meant to be honest with him. It was during one of your rants about your coworker in your regular, civilian life. You were mocking her, but in the process, said aloud your name. You didn't know if Red Hood caught onto it, but he had, and stood in shock about how someone as lethal as you could have such a beautiful name.

It took him several months of knowing your name to finally reveal his. Jason Todd, you thought it suited him quite well. With that introduction, the two of you had shown each other what you looked like under the mask as well. Jason of course, already knew what you looked like. The moment he found out your name he researched everything he could find.

Pictures didn't do justice for how beautiful he found you.

After knowing each other's names, the two of you moved away from being work friends, to best friends. Jason introduced you to a few of his other friends, as well as his family. It didn't take you long to piece together that Bruce Wayne was Batman, in fact it kind made sense.

The two of you became inseparable. You were roommates, friends, and partners against crime. There was barely a moment that the two of you were ever apart and you couldn't understand how you didn't go crazy after spending so much time together with one person.

Maybe it was because Roy Harper was over all the time and he was able to diversify your little partnership. You always liked Roy, more so when you found out that he was Arsenal. He always knew how to bring humor into the room and break apart any tension that might have been there.

Roy was the reason that you and Jason started dating.

After a long nights work, the three of you were at bar, drinking and dancing the rest of the night away. You and Roy always had a bit of an on and off fling - the occasional hookup and nothing serious. In fact, it was so casual, that not even Jason knew about it. You kept it from him, not that it was on purpose.

So, when Jason saw you grinding against Roy in the middle of the club with his hands dragging all over your body, he got maybe too jealous. Jason was never one to cause a scene, not over something like this at least. However, that night, the three of you got kicked out by the bouncers and never to return.

Jason was fuming at Roy and he had no idea where it was coming from. You had hooked up with lots of guys over the years that you knew each other but there was something about his best friend wanting to sleep with you that drove him nuts. He couldn't bare the thought of you two together - so you and Roy promised to never tell him the truth.

By the time that you got back home to your shared apartment, you were fuming. Jason had completely embarrassed you in front of so many people and you had no idea why. He never showed jealously with you and you couldn't figure out why he suddenly felt this protective.

It wasn't until you sat him down and forced him to talk. If he could trust you with everything else going on in his life why couldn't he trust you with this? Jason told you the truth. He told you everything that he was feeling in his heart like he had planned this speech out a million times. That wasn't the case at all.

Jason had no idea where his words were coming from or that he was able to tell you so easily that he had fallen in love with you over the years that you had known him. You weren't sure if it was the alcohol that was helping him along or if he was secretly this great with words all the time.

Either way, by the time that Jason had finished speaking, you were already falling into his arms and pressing your lips against his.

Crime fighting had been taken to a whole new level. The protectiveness you felt for each other pressured you into making riskier decision to save one another. You would come home with cuts and bruises that the other would have to stitch up. You had been doing it for years, fixing each other up the best that you could.

Accidents started to get worse and you realized how often that either one of you ended up so broken that it would take weeks before you were able to go back out on the streets. You were starting to wonder how long this life was meant to last - and how much farther you could with it.

Jason never noticed your attitude change. He never noticed that you were feeling less inclined to go protect the city you lived in or the sleepless nights of wondering if the next night was going to be your last.

It wasn't until he was stitching you up the one night did you finally tell him how you felt.

"I can't do this anymore," your voice was tight and you closed your eyes to hopefully stop the tears. The two of you were getting older, just because Bruce still went out on the streets, didn't mean that you needed to at this age. You weren't twenty anymore, you couldn't heal like you used to.

"What?" Jason paused mid stitch to look up at you.

"We're in our thirties now, Jay," You sighed. "I can't keep going out on the streets in this costume fighting an endless battle. I can't keep staying up at night wondering if we're going to be alive the next day."

"Baby, where is this coming from?" Jason asked. He went back to finishing your stitches. He only had two left and then tied the knot to secure it. If you wanted to have a serious conversation, then he didn’t want you bleeding out on the bathroom counter. "You always loved being out there."

"I want to have a family with you, Jay," you finally opened your eyes again to look at his reaction. Neither of you had ever talked about wanting to have kids. For the longest time, kids were never an option in your line of work. Getting older, seeing some of your normal friends having kids, it made you want that life.

"I wanna have kids with you, and see you be an amazing father because I know god damn well that there is no one better out there to be the father of my kids. I want to get married, and go dress shopping. I want to have some normalcy to remind me that you and I are just human."

Jason stayed silent. You wish you knew what was going through his head right now. Completely out of no where and you spew this crazy dream on him. These dreams that you kept to yourself were something that you wanted as a kid. You didn't think you would get that chance after becoming a vigilante.

You tried to read his face, his eyes, but he was giving you nothing.

Jason loved you, you knew he did. He woke up in the nights, out of a nightmare and drenched in sweat. Too many nights did he dream the Joker got to you too. He never wanted to see you hurt.

Yet every night the two of you still went out there, getting hurt anyways. There were too many close calls.

You didn't realize that Jason's silence led to his tears. You worried that he was upset that you wanted to quit. After years of saving so many lives, it was your greatest success. Leaving it meant you'd have to start over.

Your hands shakily went up to his cheeks, wiping away he tears that slipped down. He leaned into your hands, welcoming your touch just as he had so many times.

"You want to have kids with me?" Jason shakily asked. You nodded your head. The most heart warming, loved filled, smile rose on his face. He wrapped his arms around you, burying his bruised face into your neck.

Jason, when he was younger, never wanted kids. He didn't want any child of his to end up suffering like he had when he was young. He didn't want to see some innocent soul get trapped into the same story that his life was. Children was never in his play book.

Until he met you. Jason never realized he could love someone as much as he loved you. You were the kind of person that would uphold the tough act when facing down an evil, and melt at the toxin of someone you loved. You were the kind of stability that Jason needed.

"Jay, Baby," you still weren't sure what was going through his head. Your hands ran through his flattened hair, trying to bring comfort to him. There were several times that you wanted to bring up the idea of starting a family, but it never seemed like the right time. Now, you decided that there would never be a right time, you would just have to do it.

"You would trust a fuck up like me to take care of your child?" Jason questioned. He knew that you trusted him to always have your back out on the field, but to take care of a fragile life? After everything that he's done, the aggression that he had, and yet you still thought that he would be able to take care of a baby?

"There's no one I would rather have," you assured. Since dating him, not a single other man crossed your mind - and many men (and women) have tried. "I know you had a shitty father growing up, even Bruce was off and on. If there's one thing I know, is that you would make sure our kid had the best damn life they can."

Jason placed both his hands on your cheeks. He pulled you in for a kiss, one that wasn't rushed like they usually were. This one was filled with love, passion, and even longing. This kind of kiss was not the kind of kiss that Jason usually gave you.

He wasn't sure if he was ready to give up being the Red Hood, or if he could leave his life as an anti-hero. What he knew for sure, was that you were the love of his life and getting the chance to see a little you running around the house? That was something he never thought he would ever get the chance to have.

"Let's start a family."

#jason todd #jason todd imagine #jason todd oneshot #jason todd x reader #red hood #red hood imagine #dc #imagine #batfam #dc imagine #dc one shot #batfam imagine #batfam x reader #red hood oneshot #catxsnow writes

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drethanramslay · 4 years

Text

A funny thing called Fate: Chapter 1

Pairing: Bryce X MC (Aisha Khurrana)

Word count: 2.6K words

Series Masterlist

Masterlist

Warning: None really, just some cursing

Author's note: Hello!! I am back with the first chapter of "A funny thing called Fate" and this time this is in Bryce's POV

Like I said last time, there would be time jumps so you will be seeing both- 16 year old Bryce and present day Bryce

Just a word of caution, 16 year old Bryce (according to me) is your typical bad boy who is a jerk and upholds his reputation and prestige as the most important priorities

I decided to take part in @choicesseptemberchallenge20 the prompt being- LOST

Also decided to take part in @choicesweeklychallenge the prompt being "I just... don't know. Honestly."

Both of them will be in bold

TERMS THAT YOU NEED TO KNOW:

-> kanilehua: Motherfucker (I literally googled curse words in Hawaiian language so please forgive me if they are wrong 🤧)

-> okole: Butt/ Ass

-> budhiya: old woman in Hindi

Forgive me if I make any mistakes

10 years ago- Bryce's POV

"Aloha!!" Bryce's cheerful voice ran clear through the hallways as he approached his teammates, instantly capturing the attention of the people.

"Hey Bryce, my man." Jason, his best friend stepped forward and did a complicated handshake with him before patting his back.

"How was the summer?" Kai, his other best friend spoke up as he leaned against the lockers, his dark hair falling on his eyes.

"You know the usual. Practice and stuff. My parents did take us to Australia. The waves there are sweet." Bryce whistled lowly, remembering how he spent numerous days surfing at sea.

"What a lucky bastard. Do you think your parents would adopt me?" Jason asked causing Kai to chuckle.

At this point, they would want anyone but me as their son. A dark look passed on his face but he hid it behind the over cheerful and happy go lucky mask.

"So, what's up with you guys?!" He asked, smoothly changing the topic.

Jason began. "Well I for one, had a fun summer hanging out at the beach, enjoying the sun-"

"-having flings left, right, centre." Kai completed the sentence, snickering.

"As if you weren't the one who fooled around more. You broke so many hearts, Kai!!" Jason rolled his eyes.

"But I finally settled down, unlike your unsettled ass." Kai exclaimed.

"50 bucks you will break up with him in ten days." Kai narrowed his green eyes and smacked the back of Jason’s head.

"Wow, seems like I have some catching up to do." Bryce smirked.

Kai turned towards Bryce, suddenly serious. "Glad you brought it up. We have a proposition for you."

Bryce incredulously raised his eyebrow.

"Your two o'clock. Short brunette with glasses. Don't be too obvious."

Bryce ran his hand through his long hair and his amber eyes fell on the girl.

He leaned against the locker near Jason.

"What's her deal?"

"Apparently, she joined the school last year and has been on the low. Keeps to herself, certified nerd, teacher's pet and super uptight."

Bryce eyed her and he recognized that she was in his chemistry class last year.

Aisha Khurrana.

"Wait... That's Aisha. She was in my chemistry class last year. Introverted and quiet."

Jason did a double-take. "Wait really? Well, that makes it easier for us."

"Good. I will make y'all talk to her-"

Kai stopped him midway. "Woah, woah, woah. We don't want to interact with her. You are the one doing this."

"Will one of you kanilehua tell me what the fuck is going on?" Bryce asked, getting annoyed.

"After the legendary prank Ano pulled last year, it's time we step up. So while you were tanning your okole in Australia, Jason and I were brainstorming to come up with a better idea."

Jason continued. "So we decided that you could get her fall in love with you before the finals and boom! We could pull the prank on prom."

Bryce's eyed widened. "Woah, don't you think that's extreme?"

Kai rolled his eyes. "Please, Ano humiliated a teacher and exposed that he was having an affair with a junior. I don't think it's that extreme."

"What is this prank you have planned on prom?"

Jason waved his hand. "We haven't worked out the details but we have the entire year to do that. You on the other hand... Are running out of time."

Bryce's eyebrows furrowed. "And why can't either of you take this up?"

"Because Kai here is surprisingly getting cosy with Kaeo the jock from Sunset High while I am on the principal's radar for the shit I did last year. I am this close to getting expelled." Jason enunciated his point by touching his pointer finger and thumb.

"Jas... you're touching your fingers."

"Exactly."

"So will you take one for the team?”

Bryce sighed. "I just... don't know. Honestly."

“Bro, this could literally make or break our popularity bro. You don't want to be the laughing stock of the school, do you?" They asked with puppy eyes.

The peer pressure and the need to uphold his reputation as the golden boy made him raise his hands in defeat. His eyes glanced at the losers down the hall, who people were blatantly ignoring.

Definitely don't want to fall in that category.

"Fine. I will do it. But you will owe me."

"That's our boy." The boys whooped as they clapped his back.

Bryce's eyes wandered to his new target, finding her brown eyes staring right back at him. The flecks of hazel shone with curiosity but her face was impassive as if she didn't want to let anyone in.

Well, this is going to be an interesting year, Aisha Khurrana. Bryce thought to himself.

PRESENT

When Bryce woke up this morning, he didn't think his day would turn out this way.

Who would have fucking thought that the one girl you could never get over shows up at the hospital you are a surgical intern at?

Not me.

He was looking forward to this fresh start. A new city where no one knew who he was and he hoped it stayed that way. To hone his craft and become one of the best surgeons in the country. Anything to get rid of the stains on his name.

After Aisha left at the beginning of Junior year of high school, things were hard. Not that anyone was going to believe him but he actually loved her and no matter how many people he hooked up with, no matter how much he drank himself to oblivion, there was just no getting over her.

He often wondered- no believed that he had lost his one shot at love.

You only get one great love and of course, I had to blow it up, and for what? Popularity? Reputation? That already went down the drain because of my beloved dad.

When he finally got his head in the game and things were bearable, the scandal happened towards the end of the Senior year. Sure, he could hide face during the summers, lounging in his gaudy compound. But he could hear the occasional shouts and protests out of the gates of his home, reminding him that he couldn't escape the truth.

To distract himself from his dad going to trial, his mom selling out to the feds and his baby sister crying from the stress, he dove right into his studies, hoping to score well in his SATs so that he could get away from Maui.

But there was still one year of high school left, and that was fucking awful. He was relentlessly bullied at every turn of the corridor, got the stink eye from the teachers and people jumped away from him as if he was a social pariah.

Technically, I was.

Though his parents were very tight-lipped about the details of the case, it wasn't that hard to get to know more from the internet. And the fact that the people in his school always made it a point to remind him.

Aisha's dad was one of the people who worked for the company that got screwed over by his dad.

Bryce had given up after all these years that he will ever find her again. He often wondered what would he do if he were to meet her again. The apologies he would say and the monologue on how ‘he was never the same after she left’ had been practised over and over again.

But right there she was, half-naked in front of him, completely at the loss of words. His eyes wandered, making sure if it was the same girl from tenth grade. There was a nose piercing and he saw a little ink near a hip.

"Aisha?" He repeated, completely shocked, his jaw dropped. Never in his entire life has he felt the loss of words.

They stared into each other's eyes, chocolate brown eyes meeting his amber ones, completely lost.

But that moment didn't last for long because Jackie shutting the locker made them realize that this was indeed reality.

Aisha managed to snap out of her reverie. "Oh my fucking god, I don't have time for this shit." She rapidly threw on her fresh sets of scrubs and slammed her locker before making a move.

Bryce stepped in her path, blocking her. "What are you doing here?!"

Her eyes snapped up to meet his, the familiar fire and hatred flooding in those brown orbs. "Well, I could ask you the same thing Mr. I-will-become-a-lawyer. Now out of my way, I'm getting late for the orientation." Though she was short (5 feet 3 inches to be precise), she still managed to slam her shoulder against his chest and walk away.

"Oh My God!!" Jackie's voice resounded after a few quiet moments.

"Put a cap on it nose wipe." He muttered as he rubbed the area where Aisha slammed against him.

"I didn't say anything."

"Yeah but that expression says it all." He rolled his eyes as put his stethoscope into his breast pocket.

"But, for real. Who is she?" Jackie asked, inquisitiveness laced in her voice.

Bryce flicked her nose. "I found your nose in my business, why don't you take it right out?"

"Ugh. Fine. Keep your secrets. C'mon, let us get to the orientation before it gets over."

"Yap. Right behind you." The duo headed towards the main atrium and made their way towards the front so that they could hear the hospital chief. The rest of the interns were already gathered in front of the stairs upon which an impressive, statuesque woman stood and spoke.

That is Dr Harper Emery!! Bryce thought to himself, as the very thought of standing in the very same room as his inspiration made him giddy. He turned to talk but the excitement instantly vanished because thanks to his amazing luck, he ended up standing right next to Aisha.

The universe, what games are you playing against me? Bryce let out a sigh which caught Aisha's attention. She just gave an annoying glance and stared up, as if to ask why was this happening to her.

Both of them turned away from each other and focused on what Dr Emery was saying. "... because as of today, you are no longer students, You are doctors."

Aisha turned towards Jackie and whispered. "Psst. Who is that?"

Jackie whipped her head towards Aisha's short build. "I don't know if you are joking or are serious."

Aisha's ears getting red was the only confirmation Jackie needed. Her jaw dropped and she was physically incapacitated, unable to speak before she finally managed to string together words.

"Seriously? Did you learn medicine in the woods or something?"

Aisha's eyes narrowed and Bryce just knew that if he didn't intervene Aisha would absolutely roast Jackie and her lineage.

So, in a low voice, he spoke up. "That's Harper Emery, the hospital's new chief." A smile made his way on his face as he continued to talk about her. "She's a total badass! World-famous head of neurosurgery before she got promoted."

He turned towards Jackie, smirking. "Guess she's just a scalpel jockey too, huh?"

Giving a Cheshire grin she responded. "She's the only scalpel jockey who deserves rights."

Aisha gave a stiff nod before turning back towards the Chief.

Someone is definitely a ray of sunshine. Bryce thought to himself. His conscience promptly snarked. Bold of you to assume that this isn't your fault.

Brain... Stop. as he shook his head to shake off the guilt that slowly swirled in his chest.

"More will be demanded of you that you've ever experienced. Some of you will buckle under the pressure. Some of you will quit. But some... some of you will thrive."

"Damn... She is so inspiring... I feel like I can do anything." Aisha whispered, her brown eyes sparkling with admiration.

"Well then, can I inspire you to pipe down? I'm trying to listen."

"Can I inspire you to get your ears checked, budhiya?" Jackie looked offended but you could see the glint of amusement and respect in her eyes.

"Girls, can this fight wait until after the speech?" Bryce muttered.

"This is not fighting. This is us bonding scalpel jockey. Get on the same page." Jackie whispered causing Aisha to smirk.

"I give up. But please for the love of everything good can we keep it on the low." He shot a pleading look and they managed to shut up.

"You've been entrusted with a sacred duty: the care and wellbeing of every man, woman and child who enters this hospital. Are you ready?"

The interns promptly burst into applause and they look around, sharing excited smiles with their new colleagues.

Harper Emery raised her hand, to silence the applause. "You'll be introduced to your senior residents tomorrow but for now, you'll be partnering up for your first patients. Your assignments are posted on the board. Good luck, doctors!!"

Bryce swaggered up to his board and searched for his name and found out that he was paired with a Samantha.

Wait for a second... that name sounds fami-

"You?" He swirled around towards the feminine sound and as soon as his eyes landed on her, the memories hit him.

Him running his hands through her hair whilst they kissed passionately against the door of her apartment. Her running her hands down his abs and pulling him by the loops of his belt. Both of them lost in the sensation of each other and Bryce still had the scratch marks on his back to remind him of the amazing night they had the previous day.

"Sam? I didn't know you worked here!!"

"Well fate is a funny thing, isn't it? So apparently we are partners?"

"Yap and we need to take our cases from the residents and be on our way. Are you ready?" Bryce asked, a smirk playing on his lips.

"I was born ready baby." Sam winked as she started pushing her way through the throng of interns and Bryce followed suit.

When they finally were free, Jackie showed up next to him followed by Aisha and another girl who had a striking resemblance to Chief Emery.

"See you later meathead."

"Try not to miss me too much." He winked before glancing towards Aisha. Their eyes met and she immediately looked the other way, chatting with her partner.

"It's a beautiful day to save lives. Let's have some fun, shall we?" Sam asked her eyes twinkling which just made Bryce smile.

-------------------------------------------------------------

It was going good so far. He had been allotted two cases that day. One with a routine appendectomy and the second one being a benign tumour removal from the right lung. With a cool, calm collected mind, the two of them diagnosed the patients, raising eyebrows.

"Dr Lahela, what is the treatment plan?" Dr Tanaka, the head of cardiovascular surgery asked.

"Well we are administering her with tumour shrinking drugs like bromocriptine so that we could decrease the size and then after a couple of days we will take her for surgery."

Dr Tanaka gave a nod of appreciation. Sam turned and held the young patient's hand. "Miss, you are in good hands and if you have any more questions you can always ask for us."

"Thank you so much, Dr Anderson."

They stepped out of the room and Bryce shut the door behind them.

"Keep an eye on her and do checks every four hours. Good job." Dr Tanaka turned on his heels and only when he was out of earshot Sam fist-bumped Bryce.

"The surgical society is back at it again."

"God Sam that was awful." He groaned as he pulled his pen out to sign the charts.

"Well, that just means I need to keep thinking of names for the dynamic duo. See you later byeee."

He shook his head and gave the charts to the nurses' station before whistling down the confusing corridors of Edenbrook when suddenly he heard a thud sound from the nearby supply closet.

Must be a doctor who is not having a good day.

He stopped before the door, contemplating whether he should enter or leave but his instinct to help overpowered and he cracked open the door to see Aisha leaning heavily against the racks, her back towards him. Her shoulders were shaking and he could hear her heavy breathing.

He was about to leave unnoticed when Aisha’s voice wafted over to him. “get in or get out. Don’t hold it open.” She glanced towards the door and Bryce knew that he could kiss his unnoticed exit goodbye.

Oh boy.

Oh? so we have a new character 👀 And um that really wasn't the reunion Bryce was looking forward to lol

And now the supply closet yikes yikes yikes okay now i will shut up heheheh

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hood-ex · 4 years

Text

Roy Harper Characterization

I am a HUGE fan of Roy Harper. I’ll defend him until the day I die. I’m always interested to read what other people think about him and how they might interpret his actions, so I was interested to read the issues detailed by roywilliamharperjr. I don’t really like N52 and RHATO was eh, but I was surprised by how conflicted I felt about some of their points.

There were some things I agreed with right away - the erasure of Brave Bow, for example, or outright making his father abusive. Roy’s connection with Brave Bow is integral to his connection to archery, it is something that I personally think means a lot to him, so including it in his origins is essential. Making his father an “abusive alcoholic” is also unnecessary. I don’t like this trope, because it implies that all addicts are abusive. His father was never mentioned to be an addict originally, but that part of his characterization would make sense. Addiction tends to run in the family. What I take issue with is automatically making his father abusive. It’s a trait that often gets lumped in with alcoholism, which can overshadow the tragedy of it. But that’s neither here or there. These were the points I agreed with. But there are some things that really gave me pause.

They literally kept pushing the idea that he couldn’t even be trusted with money since he’ll spend it all on useless junk like ??? Like yeah that the parent that runs a household a business can’t be trusted with money, sure. In Pre52, He was completely independent when he went solo. He even refused to rejoin the Titans at first because he wanted to do things solo and find himself, and most importantly… he was a single father! A responsible father who independently raised a daughter…

Pre-FP was lighthearted, but he was also serious because of what he’s been through and he was smart and great at what he does. N52 changed him into a literal idiot (like I said, Lobdell loved reminding us of this) who can’t handle himself alone and has to crack a dumb joke every second and doesn’t take things seriously and has to be babysat by Jason. Even when they tried portraying to do things like build tech, they still wrote him as dumb. Roy’s always been someone that was good with tech, since he obviously built his arrows, weapons, so many high tech bases, etc. But the N52 chose to portray that intellect by portraying him as a mad scientist… that’s literally what they refer to him as multiple times, or a “rockabilly genius”. Basically, they wrote him so that he could only build tech, but he gets so carried away with it to the point where he either destroys a lot of crap while doing it or if he’s unsupervised, he’ll spend all their money on it. They wrote him as someone who was so irresponsible and had to be kept in check, whereas Roy is actually someone who builds things when he needs to. He’s someone who prefers to spend his time either with his family, training, or volunteering somewhere. He doesn’t spend his entire time building things for no reason, he has to plan something out, know why he needs it and adds it in. Technology is a hobby for him that he occasionally spends time on, it isn’t an obsession and it’s nowhere near being his main focus. He was extremely dumbed down to serve a role of being the dumb guy who’s good with tech.

Regardless of what the writer meant, being careless with money is a trait impulsive people tend to have (impulsivity also tends to be common for people who have issues with addiction). Not dumb people. I never read Roy as dumb. The mad scientist trope is actually indicative of high intelligence. Dumb guys aren’t good with tech. Was he scattered and irresponsible in RHATO? Sure. Are some fathers like this? Yes. Does that make him a bad father? No.

I think having Lian made him keep those impulses in check and he took on responsibility that didn’t come naturally to him, but I don’t see how fathering a child would mean you’ve now unlocked x, x, and x trait. That seems unrealistic. It’s okay to struggle with fatherhood. That is much more relatable and interesting. Roy could struggle with these impulses and still be a good father.

Anyway, this was a very simplistic explanation of Roy’s supposed lack of intelligence, which aren’t defined by any of the listed traits. I can see how he might come off that way, however. Anyone looks at disorganization or bad decisions and immediately thinks the person is a moron. This is not the case.

N52 made him an outcast in the hero community, made the league and all other heroes look down on him instead of being his friends. He looked up to the heroes and wanted to be treated as an equal among them, and he was-- he was just like any other hero, but that was all thrown out to, once again, justify him being an “outlaw”.

I do realize the OP feels otherwise, but I don’t think it was out of the question for Roy. Again, this wouldn’t be the highlight of Roy’s life and it wouldn’t be the healthiest he’s ever been, which I think is obvious, but expecting someone to remain consistent throughout their entire life isn’t realistic. Do I think it was stretched? Yeah. But again, Roy is a complex character, and when someone feels as if they aren’t living up to an ideal, it’s not uncommon to rebel against that ideal. It went a little far, but it’s not that out of the question.

Roy being a dad, and the erasure of Lian Harper. When Roy’s a dad, he was something to fight for. He has a reason to be a superhero and do what he does, to be responsible and to be more mature than he already is. Him being a dad completely changed him and gave him a reason to strive to become a better man than he already was, all for his daughter. He helped so many characters because of how his fatherhood changed him. Him being a father gave him so much happiness and brightness in his life despite the mistakes he made before. On top of that, Roy became a father when he was young. He risked his life just to see Lian and take her in. He could have easily ignored her and left her with Jade, but he chose to actively seek her out and risked his life to do so. He wanted to be a father. He wanted to raise his daughter right and be an inspiration for her, and to me that just shows the kind of man he was.

Being a father is one of Roy’s biggest character traits. It isn’t just some random thing, it was part of his characters for literal decades. It’s so much of who he is and holds so much of his development, and the erasure of it just changes so much about him for the worst.

Okay, so… while I agree that Lian is important to Roy’s growth and development, I do not think a character’s personality should be completely shaped around having a child. I do agree that Roy wanted to be a good father and improved exponentially because he took responsibility for Lian. However, there are a lot of different types of fathers. It isn’t really fair to assume Roy was perfect when he was that young, or that didn’t make mistakes.

So yes, this characterization does change him “for the worst” because he has nothing to keep him accountable. That’s okay. I am personally more interested in seeing characters crash and burn and then being shaped by that experience, not deciding to be better just because they’ve reproduced. Children aren’t bandaids.

This next part is my biggest issue with their post, however. The subject of addiction.

And then there’s his addiction… N52 changed his addiction from heroin to alcohol (it was changed back in Rebirth but still.) Addictions are not and should not be treated like they’re interchangeable. The original drug addiction story, Snowbirds Don’t Fly, was an award winning story that changed the landscape of stories that could be told in comics. It was that good, and changing for just a generic addiction story is pretty ridiculous.

Okay, so… while I get what they are trying to say, in general, addictions don’t stay in neat little boxes. People prone to addiction will often have other addictive behaviors and/or vices. Sometimes they do trade one addiction for another. I realize that their issue is eliminating the heroin from the story altogether, but my point is: addiction is the problem. The object of that addiction is not.

The original story showed that Roy was the one who kicked his addiction away, all because of his will and drive to kick it away. He was the one who wanted to get rid of his problem. With some help from people around him (aka Dinah), he kicked it away and was determined to be a better person because of it. He wanted to become an educator and volunteer to help people dealing with addictions like his, and he wanted to help fight drug dealers and help fight the drug problem. That’s why he joined the DEA– he wanted to help people who went through what he did. Roy appealed to a specific demographic of teenagers that fell low and fell into drug addiction– something that hasn’t been done before with any other character– and he served as a role model as someone who overcame it. N52 just got rid of all that and not only changed his addiction type, but had him be completely be saved by someone else (who he shouldn’t have any relation to in the first place).

Here is where it started to get really cringey for me. This person is very naive if they think that an addict can “kick their addiction away” with “will and drive.” No. It takes so much more than that. Therapy. Medication. Rehab. There is no shame or weakness in asking for or accepting help. Even if they do everything right, most people relapse. Perpetuating the idea that Roy’s willpower overcame a heroin addiction is ridiculous.

N52 focuses on him relapsing and being tempted back all the time, which is against what the character stands for. The whole point is that he’s someone that wants to move on past his mistakes and become a better person and let others see him for who he is as a hero, but N52 keeps throwing his addictions back at him

This is a terrible understanding of drug addiction. Relapses don’t happen because the person doesn’t want to “move on” or get better. Relapses happen because people are human. Relapses are extremely, extremely common, and it doesn’t make that person a hypocrite like the OP suggests. This rubs me the wrong way for so many reasons.

Heroin addiction is insidious. It’s a literal epidemic. The relapse rate is ridiculously high (over 80%). Trying to tout Roy as someone who should never relapse because it “goes against his values” is very naive. It also won’t resonate with actual drug addicts.

The real message should be that it’s okay to let someone help you. It’s even more okay to ask for help. In fact, you need to ask for help. This is not something most people can do alone.

I love Roy Harper and I will defend him until the day I die, but I don’t love him because he’s perfect. I love him because he makes mistakes and gets back up. I love him for how he handles those mistakes. That’s the real success story and that’s what people are inspired by: no matter what happens or what you do, just get back up. Keep going. Keep fighting.

It’s tiresome to see fictional characters held to impossible standards. Mistakes don’t negate good qualities and it doesn’t make them less likable.

How is an addict going to feel if they received that type of message after a relapse? They’re going to think that they went against everything they stood for, not that it was a simple mistake that happens to an overwhelming percentage of people who suffer from addiction. How is that inspiring or encouraging?

Also to comment on N52 “throwing Roy’s addictions back at him” - look, I have my problems with N52, but this isn’t one of them. That is the life of an addict. They have to overcome their addiction every day. It isn’t something you ever recover from completely. That’s why it’s so easy to relapse.

Sorry for the ramble. I know you didn’t even write this originally. I do follow your blog and <3 it, and I just needed to say something about some of these points, especially where it concerns drug addiction, because it troubled me. Roy Harper is an icon.

_____________________________________________________

I won’t put words in the OP’s mouth, but since Roy is prob the character I know most outside of the batfam, I’ll touch on a few of these points.

1. I agree that Roy’s personality doesn’t revolve around Lian. Parenthood itself is not part of the personality, but a child can impact personality in certain ways. For example, forcing someone to be more assertive, responsible, or outgoing.

You said something about how it wasn’t fair to assume Roy was a perfect father. I didn’t get the impression that was a point OP was trying to make. Roy himself said he went into fatherhood fighting and screaming, so it obviously wasn’t easy for him at first. But I got a sense that OP was mostly highlighting the fact that having Lian is the transitional point in Roy’s life that took him from boyhood to manhood. To the newly single father who works as a private detective and then transitions from Speedy to Arsenal to Red Arrow.

2. I will have to disagree with your view on switching out the heroin for alcohol. I understand what you’re saying about how the addiction to a harmful substance is the main issue. And yeah, in general, the main message of Roy’s drug abuse is that anyone can fall prey to addiction, not just misguided people.

But “Snowbirds Don’t Fly” was inspired by heroin addicts on the streets and in the drug rehab center that the authors encountered/worked with.

The effects and risks of heroin addiction also differ from that of alcohol. They produce different struggles for people to deal with, different withdrawal symptoms, etc. Alcohol can be abused more often because of how accessible it is yadda yadda yadda.

This is why I personally take issue with the two being interchangeable. It may also seem like a minuscule detail that doesn’t really matter (because like you said the focus is the addiction, not the substance itself). But it would be kind of like switching out the murder weapon that killed Bruce’s parents. You may think that the weapon itself doesn’t matter because the focus is on the loss of his parent’s lives.

But everyone knows Bruce’s parents were killed via gun. As a result of that, Bruce has always had an issue with guns in particular. So if we were to switch out the gun with a crowbar (shoutout Jason) in The New 52/Rebirth then that changes Bruce’s character in some ways. It changes his trauma and his association with guns. In his mind gun = murder = loss = grief = failure. The image of the gun is very much so tied into the trauma of losing his parents, which puts significance on the murder weapon.

Readers would be like wtf I thought Bruce’s parents were killed with a gun, why does this say they got whacked with a crowbar? It would be inconsistent writing and it would make readers confused about what was true and what wasn’t true.

So I guess you could say the same thing for Roy and heroin. Heroin is the vehicle he used to try and cope with his life, not alcohol. Heroin is the drug that got him fucked up, not alcohol. Heroin is the drug he suffered withdrawal from, not alcohol. Heroin is the drug he constantly has to fight to stay away from, not alcohol. (Although, yes, addictions can be switched out for other addictions, but canonically, as far as I know, Roy never abused alcohol.)

3. In real life, yes, people with addictions generally need to go to some kind of rehab program to get help. However, if we’re going strictly by what’s shown to us in comics, then yes, Roy kicked his addiction without rehab, meds, or therapy. He quit cold turkey and went through the horrific withdrawal symptoms with Dinah by his side. That’s what’s portrayed in the comic. Roy literally attributes his ability to kick the addiction by getting help from Dinah, Hal, and his friends. Not going to rehab or any of that.

That’s why I think OP possibly found it insulting that N52 portrayed Roy as someone who continued to relapse. Because before N52, he managed to kick his addiction without relapsing. Obviously, not many people in real life can quit cold turkey like Roy did in the Snowbird issue. And before Flashpoint, Roy actually did relapse when Lian died. So I do agree that maybe OP wasn’t very uh… sensitive to the rate of relapse amongst people with addictions.

Anyways, this is just me sharing some of my thoughts on your points. Glad we can have discussions like this. Thanks for following my blog <3

#Roy Harper #drugs cw #alcohol cw #addiction cw #heroin cw #character analysis #submission #replies #anon

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ashleyswrittenwords · 5 years

Text

How To Be A Queen [Part 11]

Note: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh. I said no cliff hangers. I’m a liar. Also wtf this surpassed 40k words. It’s 85 pages long on my word doc. How in the hell.

Summary: Princess Zelda is at a loss. Her handed royal responsibilities have begun to weigh heavily on her and she is eventually backed into a corner. Live a life she loathes or run away from everything she’s ever known? Navigating life is hard, and Link forces her to learn that she doesn’t have to do it alone.

Warning: Cussing. Like big boy words.

Part 1

How To Be A Queen

The few days before the festival flew by. Mrs. Harper had barely finished our gowns on top of the many last-minute requests from other Hateno residents. Anju and I were enlisted at times along to help with sewing. It was hectic, but I loved it. Nothing was expected of me other than my occasional assistance. Over the duration of this time, I had rarely bumped into Link. When I did, he asked what I was up to and was off again as quick as he came. Every now and again, I’d notice him hanging off to the side with that same group of men helping with putting together decorations or stalls for the festival. Sometimes talking with Aryll, other times being pushed away by her.

A boy ran across the courtyard in hot pursuit of a rooster while two other children trailed behind in fits of light laughter. The sun had long since set and a myriad of lanterns were lit around the village. Jovial music played from a makeshift band of young and old musicians alike. Some drifted off to join other festivities while others jumped in to fill the gap. The musicians hooted and hollered louder than their own instruments at times. The music never lost its beat and had been playing boisterously since early evening. I had never heard the likes of the tunes they played, but I could tell it could get the most sober man to clap along.

Which, incidentally, was what I was doing near the edge of the crowd. Sharla Harper had just parted from me to join the dancing throngs of people after our idle witnessing of her husband playing the violin with aggressive enthusiasm. Admittedly, I had turned down a dance with her and chose to become a sort of wallflower instead.

A thin-stemmed glass was pushed into my hands and Malon came into view. Her cheeks were red from alcohol and a smile brimmed her cheeks as she spoke, “Drink! We won’t be able to get free booze like this until Spring.”

“And without the judgement to boot,” I said, trying to match her enthusiasm and stole a glance around us. It seemed like everyone and their grandmother was taking part in the festival’s pleasantries. Not that I was expecting a castle ball’s scrutiny, but this was a completely different world after all. People were laughing, singing, dancing, and I was under the impression that they truly wanted to be here with their loved ones to celebrate another successful harvest season. I was out of my realm and I was loving it.

“You look like you’re having an amazing time and you haven’t even done anything yet,” Malon said, bringing me out of my thoughts. I shrugged and touched the glass to my lips, suddenly realizing I was beaming at nothing in particular.

“Have you seen him?” Her grin was almost devious and I took a small sip of the sparkling ricewine. It smelled vaguely of roses and the color was a matching light pink. “Who are you talking about?” I asked absently, my eyes were drawn to the band before meeting hers.

“Oh, don’t play coy. You know who I mean,” Malon’s voice was lowered as if anyone was eavesdropping.

I wrapped my arms around myself, the glass held lightly in my right hand. I spun a little, feeling my gown twist around my legs. I felt light and appreciate that the only layers needed was a bodice and a white slip. I admired how my drink wasn’t far off from the color of my dress and shook my head, “He probably doesn’t want to look after me all the time. It’s not a big deal.”

“Not a big deal?” The woman looked frustrated, “He’s missing out on the most beautiful woman in Hateno and it’s not a big deal?”

I laughed and rolled my head back to look at the sky, “You’re being ridiculous or are you talking about yourself? Because the latter would make sense.” The stars were glistening, not a cloud in the sky. It was like the goddesses blessed the night and were watching from above.

“I’m serious,” Her words were drawn out and she gripped her own glass tightly, “You look hot tonight.” I hid my smile behind the drink. “Thank you, love. You look gorgeous tonight too.”

There were a few men that hung around us. They stole looks at us and I felt bashful. I did feel confident in how I presented myself though. The gown Mrs. Harper had sewn together was perfect. The gown’s neckline heart shaped and was drawn tightly around my waist before flowing in an A-Line skirt. A thick lacy white ribbon was wrapped around my middle and a grey shawl was wrapped around my shoulders and tucked underneath my arms. It was very effective in keeping out the cold, but I dared not to stray far from fire pits that were littered throughout the square.

My shoulders loosened and I quickly realized I had downed the wine as I listened to Malon’s rambling. She gasped and took it from me, mumbling, “We need more drink.”

“Hm?”

“We need more drink!” She said quite a bit louder and turned. I lost her in the crowd and didn’t bother following.

Alone again, I turned my attention to the music and the dancers. They twirled and the partners parted to make lines, then moving through to find their partners again. The ladies bunched their skirts in one hand, laughing and stomping to the beat. I felt a hand on my shoulder and I jumped.

I looked over my shoulder and expected Malon but found Link squeezing between a couple. His hair hung partially in his eyes from navigating through the crowd, then he looked at me completely and I felt like my world stopped. The space around us seemed quieter than before and all I wanted to do was hear what he wanted to say. The air felt suddenly so warm that I was almost wanting to take my shawl off.

He had opened his mouth speak but seemed to forget his words. Instead he looked at the band. So, I did too. Occasionally, I looked over to see if he would finally say something – anything. He wore a nice white long-sleeved shirt and he smelled like mead. It could have been anyone that smelled like that around us, but I supposed since we were standing so close it had to be him.

“Hey,” he finally said. Link wasn’t really making eye contact.

For whatever reason I started laughing. Something about the prolonged silence and the sudden greeting tickled me. I didn’t doubt it was the ricewine from before that helped fuel it. Link finally looked fully at me and a flash of confusion ran across his features. Then, he was laughing too.

“Hello Link,” I managed to say between giggles. He was just softly smiling now, not nearly as troubled as before and watched as I calmed myself down. “I’m sorry, Malon forced a drink onto me before you got here.”

“She forced you to drink?” Link asked, sounding worried. His eyes flicked to the faces behind me, as if looking for her.

“Oh no. No, no,” I put a hand up, “I was more than happy to oblige. She just put it in my hands.”

He seemed relieved and then grabbed my hand that I had somehow put on his chest. I don’t remember doing that.

“Do you want to dance?” He lightly rubbed the top of my hand with his thumb as if it was a natural thing to do. As if he’d done it before.

“I,” I had no idea what to say. “Yes,” I said, my heart beating quickly as I glanced at where the music was playing and back to him. His smile reached his eyes and I panicked, “I-I mean no.” My eyes grew wide as I realized what I had said, “I mean yes! But!”

At this point I’m sure I looked redder than the tomato pin cushion Anju’s mum uses.

“I don’t know how to dance!” I said quickly in a horrible attempt to recover. I must have looked like a bumbling idiot.

“You knew how to dance the last time,” he said plainly. “Zel, are you sure you want to? We don’t have to.”

“Yes!” I had the itch to fiddle with my hands, but he was still holding one of them. Why was I so nervous? It was Link. It was only Link. “Ballroom dancing is all I can do. Usually it’s only 1-2-3-4 1-2-3-4… but this is not ballroom dancing and I’ll look-“

“You’ll look beautiful.”

I stopped talking. Feeling that feeling in my chest bubble up again. I felt inexplicably happy. So happy, in fact, that my brain forgot to spit out words for me to say. He thinks I’m beautiful?

“And,” Link continued, shrugging his shoulders, “I’ll only dance with you. So, if you don’t want to, we’re both missing out.”

“That’s evil.”

Link nodded knowingly, “I know, but it has to be done.”

“I don’t know the steps.”

“There really aren’t any steps. Just follow what everyone else is doing,” he said, tugging on my hand. “If it makes you feel any better, it’s gotten to the part of the night where everyone’s too drunk to care.”

I raised an eyebrow, “How do you know the right things to say all the time?”

That toothy smile was back, “Trust me, it’s pure luck.”

He led us out of the audience. The music was even louder here and somehow someone snuck a drum into the group of already noisy instruments. I gathered my skirts in one hand like many of the other women and somewhere along the way either Link had let go of me or we were forced apart. Now I was sandwiched between two rather large women. I copied the swaying motions and found myself doing rather well. One of the women nearly tripped and the other started cackling. There was a weird box step and the group moved forward as someone on a fiddle played vivaciously.

I noticed we had separated into lines with lines of men and boys themselves moving between and finding their partners. Rather inelegantly a smaller boy bumped into me but held out his hands. I paused, confused, but crouched down and offered my own. His little fingers interlocked with mine and we did a small circle swaying dance. I laughed at his pink face.

“You’re a rather good dancer,” I said.

He looked at me in surprise but put on a brave face. “Thanks. Mum says so too.”

I looked up to see Link with one of the women before with an expression not too different from my dance partner’s. His eyes caught mine and I tried hiding my laughter. Link mouthed something and I shook my head, not understanding. A beat went by and partners separated and reconjoined. Link closed the gap between us and didn’t hesitate to interlock his fingers with mine.

“Hey,” he said again.

My lips twitched upward, “Hello Link.”

“I see you found someone else to dance with.”

“Oh, yes. He was so charming. He stole my heart and left just as quick. Didn’t even catch his name,” I sighed wistfully. The couples moved to form a large circle with another group making another inner circle. We happened to end up on the inside.

“Really?” He asked with a surprised voice, “I’m so honored to know that the next king of Hyrule hailes from Hateno.”

I studied his face. The shape of his eyes, the small scar on his cheek, the way his smile started out lopsided before evening out on his cheeks. I nodded slowly. “Wouldn’t that be something?”

He spun me around and I pursed my lips, “I don’t want a king, though.”

“No? What do you want then?”

I shrugged with a smile, “I don’t know. Kings are awfully boring. Instead, I want someone who can make me laugh and smile.” I thought for a moment, then nodded, “Yes, that sounds about right.”

He hummed, “So, a court jester.”

“Exactly. A dreamy court jester.”

Link laughed at my expression and we were pulled apart again. The cold air replaced where his warm hands were, and the same sequence of dancing went on. After what seemed like forever, I had snuck from the dance and into the chattering audience once more. I hadn’t seen Link in quite some time, so I assumed he couldn’t find me on time to make a convenient exit together. It hadn’t bothered me and I found Anju and Aryll by a food stall.

Aryll noticed me first and pointed me out to Anju with her meat kabob, “Lookie here!”

Anju lit up when she saw me, making me smile back. “Do you want some?” I agreed and she gave me her half of the stick. “I’m full anyway.”

I thanked her and hung on the side, vaguely listening to their conversations as I watched people pass.

“Does he dance good,” Aryll said with a mouth full of steak.

I nodded bashfully, not bothering to ask how she knew. “He can waltz well too,” I said, pulling a roasted carrot off and popping it into my mouth.

Aryll blanked, “Pardon?”

Anju giggled, “Are you serious?”

“Mmhm,” I swallowed, “During the winter solstice ball.”

Aryll started choking and Anju laughed loudly, trying to smack her friend’s back in a lame attempt to help. “Oh-Oh my. Get him. I want to hear more. A first-hand account by the man himself,” Anju waved me off, keeling over at Aryll’s expression.

I walked around aimlessly for a moment and found a stray waste bin for the now empty stick. In all honesty, I had no idea where to find him. He had just narrowly found me before but looking at all the people it felt like searching for a needle in a haystack. There was no way everyone was from this little town and from what I overheard I was mostly right. Many people came from more rural outskirts.

My eye caught someone walking out of the square. It looked like Mac, one of the first people we had seen upon coming to Hateno and he seemed close to Link. So, I made up my mind to follow him.

“I’m sorry,” a man cut into my path and I stopped. “Do I know you?”

I squinted in the faint light of a lamp. He was a middle-aged gentleman with graying hair, but I didn’t recognize him. His smile was sweet and gentle, as if he already knew the answer. I shook my head, “No, sir. I don’t recall. I hope you find the person you’re looking for.”

His smile widened, “My deepest apologies.”

I looked at him questionably and he moved slightly to the side, giving me allowance to move past. I felt scrutinized and looked at my feet as I left. Strange. Nevertheless, I saw Mac just barely disappear around a corner and I followed. It was quieter here other than the soft chatter of standoffish groups. Some merchants hung around; others began packing up. I suppose it was that time of night. I hugged my shawl closer and felt unsure.

Mac didn’t move fast and he held two pints of mead - one for each hand. He turned another corner and Toma shouted his name.

“-you took so long I’m basically sobered up.”

“You are nowhere near sober. You can barely walk,” Mac grumbled and I heard a clanking of glass. I stopped just before rounding the corner with him. It felt weird to barge in, I didn’t know them like that. What was I going to say? That I stalked Mac to find them?

As I was thinking about excuses I heard Link say something mildly insulting to Toma and I thought Kafei’s laughter was a warning for a heart attack. He wheezed so bad he started coughing. “You sound like an old man,” Toma quipped, “You got asthma too.”

“Oof. That hurts, mate,” Kafei coughed again to clear his throat, “At least the ladies think this old man is sexy.”

“You have exactly one lady,” Link chimed in, laughing at his own joke.

“Um, one more than all of you!” He shouted, “Besides I have a multitude of women in several other regions. A platoon. You remember when I went to Gerudo Town?”

“Yeah. When you were ten.”

“I was an early bloomer.”

“Does Anju know that?” Mac’s voice disappeared into the pint.

“This conversation stays here and if anyone else knows you’re all dead,” Kafei shouted, again. Even if they didn��t tell, Anju was bound to overhear all the way in the square.

“I’d pay money to see you fight Link,” Toma snickered, “500 rupees right now.”

“Link is a fucking knight.”

Link snorted, “I’ll let you beat me if you split it.”

“With how competitive you are? I don’t want to die young.”

“You’re already old.”

“I’m only two years older than you, fucker.”

There was a wide array of bickering between Toma and Kafei. I rehearsed my excuse in my head, ‘Oh, no. I’m lost! Wait, friends? Thank heavens I found you all. I was just so lost. Aryll wanted to talk to you, Link.’ Okay, no, that won’t work. That sounds worse than stalking one of them.

“Besides Link already has a girl,” Kafei said, “We’re obsolete, boys.”

“Shut up,” I could barely hear Link. I swallowed thickly, thinking about just walking away, but I’m sure they would hear a pair of heels on the stone. Perhaps I can take them off.

“Who? Blondie?” Toma asked.

“That one girl,” Kafei asked. There was a bout of silence. “Selma.”

“What? That’s not even close to her name,” Link chuckled. Toma began laughing unnecessarily loud.

“Zelda!” Toma shouted, “Her name is Zelda. I remember. She’s cute. I almost bedded her.” His words started slurring. Someone probably hit him because there was a light “Ow” that followed.

“She’s not mine, believe me,” Link said.

“What’s the color of her eyes?”

“Green,” he didn’t even miss a beat.

“You’re basically married,” Kafei clapped his hands together. “Congratulations.” I stared at my shoes and felt my face flush. I wasn’t supposed to be here. My hands felt sweaty. I should slip away.

Link didn’t say anything for a long moment. “Trust me, that will never happen.”

Kafei made a noise, “Why not? Why else would you bring someone like that here?”

“Her dad-“

“Yeah, I get it. Her dad paid you. But you could have taken her anywhere. Rito Village and see the aurora borealis, the tops of Mount Lanayru, the warmth of the Gerudo. Anywhere in Hyrule. But you took her here. I’m assuming this girl comes from money and she could have gotten a whole party of people to accompany her just like how every rich person does. But it’s just you. So, what’s the catch?” Kafei quieted down. I pulled at my fingers, feeling overly nervous.

“It doesn’t matter,” He sounded frustrated. I could imagine that he was doing that tick where he ran a hand through his hair and lightly pulled at it as he did. Link sounded annoyed and for whatever reason it upset me. “She’s just immature and wanted to do something her parents wouldn’t allow. I was a convenient solution. She doesn’t mean anything to me, not like that. Lay off, alright? It’s fucking annoying.”

My blood ran cold. What?

“You don’t mean that. You know that I know you don’t,” Now Kafei had raised his own voice, “It’s bullshit.”

“It’s just a job. Nothing more. I’m literally just walking her from place to place and getting money from it. Easiest gig I’ve had in 5 years. Are you happy?”

There was silence other than a sniffle. I quickly went to hold my nose.

“What was that?” I heard Link say.

Toma cleared his throat, “I’m sorry I think I had too much of your aunt’s chili.”

“Are you kidding me, Toma? I swear I should beat your ass,” Kafei said. The bickering continued and I took it as my cue to leave. My heart felt heavy in my chest. ‘I should have expected this,’ I thought repeatedly.

Anju found me before I did her. She was smiling brightly until she saw my face. “Goodness, you look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

I knew I couldn’t smile to console her. “I think I’ll be off tonight instead.”

“Off?” She looked bewildered, “Off to where.”

“I’m not sure. Anywhere to be honest.”

She stared at me with concern filling her eyes and we later walked wordlessly back to her parents’ residence. They themselves were still at the festival and I felt a pang of guilt for not thanking them properly. She offered me a bag and I packed what little I had. The focus was getting out of here. I had gold and the clothes on my back. Anju packed what food she could.

Anju stood in the doorway of my temporary bedroom with my traveling clothes now clean and folded, “I won’t convince you to reconsider nor will I ask what happened.”

She set the clothes down on the bed and took my hands in hers, “However, when you go can I please tell Link?”

“I’m not so sure,” I found it hard to keep my voice steady. I couldn’t decide if I was simply mad or disappointed or sad. Whatever it was weighed heavily and all I wanted was to leave.

She dropped her hands and I frowned, “I think it’s for the best that I go alone.”

“Do you truly believe that?”

“No, but I’m trying to.”

Anju stepped out and I changed. With the backpack strapped, I followed her out of the village. There were plenty of people leaving from the festival and we didn’t stick out. Once we reached the outskirts I turned to her, “Anju, it’s okay if you want to go back. I don’t expect you to be out here in the cold with me.”

“It’s just that I don’t want to leave you,” she was tearing up, making me do the same.

I embraced her, “I’ll be okay! And you should be okay too. You’re one of my closest friends and I wish nothing but happiness for you.”

“Be careful. Whatever he said or whatever he did… I’ll kill him if you want me to, Zelda.”

I laughed tearfully at her comment, “It’s fine, Anju.”

“No, it’s not! Obviously not.”

I shrugged my shoulders, “All he did was make it clear that he didn’t want to babysit me.” I cleared my throat, “And that’s fine.”

She wasn’t too convinced but relented. “I’ll miss you.”

We said some farewells and I made sure to have her do the same with Aryll and Malon. Then, we parted. I had produced a map from my coat pocket, found Hateno, and traced my finger to the Gerudo region. I’d have to back track quite a bit before reaching a new trading route, but I supposed it couldn’t be the worse of situations. I thought momentarily of going to the Spring of Wisdom, Mount Lanayru was right here, but decided that would be awful in the dead of winter. Gerudo region it was then.

I had been walking for a half hour or so. I took my time, there wasn’t anywhere I had to be immediately. No one to keep up with and no one to listen to. I frowned to myself, his stories weren’t that good anyway. In fact, they were boring and dumb. Tears pricked my eyes. They were very dumb. I hated the fact that his absence gave me no solace. I went into this whole idea of traveling with excitement for my independence and look where that has gotten me? I should be excited. Eager, even. I was just a job, huh? Well, he should be relieved that I left without him. Hell, maybe Link wanted me to leave.

The tune of the festival music was repeating in my head. He had a stupid smile too. And I lied to Aryll, he dances very badly. A tear escaped from my eyes, leaving a trail that the cold air clung to. I’m not crying. I am not crying. I hated the way he talked and the way he’d look at me. Even the way he looks. Why not just add that to the pile too? Amongst it all, the thing I most hated about Link Forester was how he refused to get out of my head.

“Where are we going?”

I screamed and my neck nearly snapped off with how fast I looked to my right. I nearly started bawling.

“Why did you leave?” Link Forester didn’t even want my answer to his initial question, not like it properly registered in the first place. I stopped in my tracks. Link was staring at me as if he was angry.

“How did you find out so fast? How did you-”

“Anju is a bad liar. Why did you leave without me?” Link had frustration written all over his face.

My tears had dried and were replaced with anger. “Don’t talk to me like that. If anyone should be angry, it should be me!”

He looked taken by my outburst. I was too, my bottom lip quivered and I started walking again. I didn’t want to face him right now. He said enough and I didn’t want to hear it again.

“Could you at least tell me why you’re angry?” He sounded defeated, tired and that in itself riled me up more.

“You’ve been dishonest with me!” I threw my hands up. It was obvious, was it not? “I’m immature! I mean nothing to you and I’m just a job.”

Link didn’t move to negate anything. Instead he just watched my emotions bubble over idly. I bit my lip hard to stop from outright crying. “I would be fine if you had told me upfront that you felt that way. I would have accepted it and we would move on like that. It’s not odd that someone deals with me just for money. I’m accustomed to it. I expect that.” I put a hand behind my head, trying to find my words before speaking again. Slower now, partly to myself, “I didn’t with you. I wanted desperately to believe that you hung around because you liked me. That may have been my own fault. I don’t know what I was thinking.”

He just kind of stood there and stared. He was still wearing the same clothes from earlier tonight, his shoes were changed into boots though and he had his sword strapped to him. He was refusing to look at me. I drew my attention away from him. Link’s silence only confirmed my feelings and I hated it. Something dawned on me and I drew in a breath. If he wanted Princess Zelda of Hyrule, he could have her.

“I want to remind you that you are no means tied to my agency,” I had found my voice. It was an odd feeling to speak to him like this. But it did make him look at me.

My eyes stayed on him and he seemed shocked as if it were news to him. It wasn’t anything untrue. I stood tall in my boots and tried to void any feelings I had for him. They didn’t matter, much less to him.

“What are you talking about?” Link said incredulously.

I breathed inward. I knew I didn’t want to say it. In reality, I didn’t want him to leave my side. He was a comforting constant that kept me situations caused by my own shortfalls… but for someone who didn’t want to be by my side by pure choice alone wasn’t right. Goddesses, I want to be selfish and tell him he can’t leave my side even if his life depended on it. I knew he’d do it. I resented myself.

“You’re bounded by orders, right?” My heart was in my throat. “In the beginning I told you that you didn’t have to come with me. My uncle may be general, but by birthright my words hold higher precedence than his.”

I paused to read his face. There wasn’t much difference, as if my words didn’t register. Link moved his head to the side, as if about to deny me.

Frustration built within me, “Look! All I’m saying is that you don’t have to be here! I may be your charge and you may be the captain of my guard, but I’m also the high princess. So…” I pursed my lips, struggling to find purchase on what I was trying to communicate, “So, you don’t have to follow me around and deal with – everything. You can go back to Hateno or go back to Castle Town if you want to. Tell my father I fell into the mouth of a crocodile, I don’t care. I’m sure he’ll be relieved.” My voice gave out and cracked, “I apologize for getting you wrapped up in my own desires. It was never my intention.”

“Zelda, you can’t-“

“I’m sorry, but I really don’t want to hear another lecture right now,” angry tears stung my eyes. I sounded completely outlandish, but Hylia knows I was in too deep. There was a painful truth in my ramblings, and the harsh reality in his eyes stared back at me. “Everyone I’ve ever met has expected something from me and it usually ends in disappointment. Save yourself the breath.” I couldn’t look at him anymore. Here we go. Oh, woe as me. I turned and started walking, halfway into a jog. You know, in one of my sappy romance novels in Castletown the girl had a similar outburst. Poured all her frustrations out and tried leaving. It happened several times, but he always stopped her. Got her to stay until they could figure something out. Something to patch up their issues.

But I wasn’t living a sappy romance novel. I let my emotions triumph my logic all the time and nothing good has come of it. It was pathetic and impractical to think that I would ever have something akin to that. No knight in shining armor reached out to stop me. For the first time in a while, I wasn’t followed either.

I wasn’t sure how much time went by. I did know how much I cried.

A lot.

Anju had snuck tissues into my bag and I’ve never been more grateful for a person. I didn’t look back after I left him and after an hour or so I did. He wasn’t there, unsurprisingly. I was tired and wrestled with stopping, but I knew if I walked through the night I could end up at the stable in the early morning hours and a soft bed sounded much nicer than the dirt.

I wasn’t too sure about the time. It was very late and it was silent other than the constant sound of my footsteps. I had hummed a long-forgotten song earlier. It was hard walking by yourself I found. It was colder too. I had my coat of course and it was formidable against the temperature. But it didn’t compare to a person.

Against everything that happened tonight, I missed him. What was with bad nights and celebrations? What an odd streak of bad luck.

My ears perked up to another sound. A steady tapping? I knew it wasn’t just my sound. My eyebrows creased and my heart beat faster.

“Leave me alone, Link.”

It continued.

“I told you before to leave me alone!”

Again, it continued and I whipped around.

It wasn’t Link.

Note: Hey beech. So that was spooky. Who is it? Idk. We’ll see, I’m so tired.

#loz #loz fanftction #htbaq #how to be a queen #link #zelda #zelink #fanfiction #fanfic #ashley writes #ashleyswrittenwords

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mariellewritesalot · 5 years

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Notes on the Romantic Narrative

As an homage to my favorite film of all-time “Silver Linings Playbook” finally being on Netflix, and a coping mechanism to everything I’ve been feeling as of late: I am writing to you about some musings I’ve been making and breaking for the past few months. About love, or lack thereof, in my life.

First, to give you an image of how I pay attention to detail in life and movies, I will start with a few reasons why I love this gem despite the huge changes they made on screen vis-à-vis the novel: 1) It portrayed mental illnesses in a way that didn’t feel pushy or overly-romanticized: healing is not linear, 2) Pat’s character development throughout the film was the epitome of his motto (and mine), “Excelsior”, 3) I love how the story sort of revolved around the Eagles and football to anchor the heaviness of the entire plot line, 4) The casting!!! I mean, wow, and 5) It makes you believe in silver linings, even in the safest sense of the idea, not too grand and definitely not perfect. Safe. Who could forget that scene where Pat runs after Tiffany with his letter? The relief we all felt knowing that her hard work and feelings were not for naught? If you haven’t seen it, I hope you have the time to. It’s a moving film, honestly.

Anyway, I digress. I am going to go personal in this bit and I might not like it, too. I am stating the obvious when I say that I am a hopeless romantic and that I tend to look at life in rose-colored glasses. Some probable reasons are because my parents have the kind of love story that really makes you believe in fate and second chances, plus the fact that I grew up with romantic films, songs, and books. I was sold to the fairy tale idea of happily ever afters despite the proof that it doesn’t apply to everyone in real life. I wanted my own story to tell. After all, I am a writer. I live for the things worth telling.

Nowadays, I also spend a lot of my time online where my timeline is bombarded with couples or romantic gestures, as if the algorithm is working against the realist in me. I can’t say I hate it, because one thing I get from this mindset is the tendency to highlight the good things, both in people or situations. The “too kind for my own good” complex. The only downside is that I may get disappointed more times than I should. It’s a tricky predicament if you think about it in my context: I grew up with mostly men in the house, in my own bubble, going through life thinking that somebody is going to sweep me off my feet, backed up by High School Musical films and the media pushing love teams down our throats...but then it hits me in real life as I grow older: movie moments do happen in real life, but they aren’t as common as they make it out to be, they’re the exception to the rule. They are as rare as they come.

Some of us aren’t as lucky.

In reality, when the hurt runs too deep, it feels almost impossible to rise above it. The hopeless romantic dies out and is replaced by a semi-angry realist, tired of how the world consistently proves that it moves in circles. They become someone who occasionally relapses into that romanticized haze every once in a while because it gets lonely. When you’ve fallen in love a few times in life, it’s hard not to expect yourself to fall into a trap, any moment now. The withdrawals grow stronger just when you’re starting to get the hang of things. It’s an exhausting ordeal, if you ask me, turning numb but knowing that you can’t shake off the romantic within when it resurfaces in the most inappropriate of moments.

I used to think that I’d be one of the lucky ones who meet the love of their life early on; someone who’s capable of being in a long-term relationship in college or maybe even after...and I still think I am, but maybe I haven’t met him yet. Maybe I have, but the timing is off or we just don’t know it until a little further down the road. Now I’ve been single for too long, and there is nothing wrong with it, just the fact that the trauma I went through has really soiled my chances of healing fast; more from the events than the actual person who did the hurting. Being here though, I am able to see how I am in a generation where #hugot culture is the norm, relationships are only as good as they are on social media, and 80% of young people are desperate to find love or at least a semblance of it. It’s nauseating, accidentally giving into the “sana all” culture and thinking I am incomplete if I don’t have someone who’s technically obligated to care for me, vice versa. I am not a fan of it, but it’s not exactly easy to exclude myself from a narrative I have been in for years. I wish it didn’t feel so off.

Because...hey, there are pros to being single. For starters: I am young. I don’t have to worry about it yet at least for the next ten years or so. I am not supposed to have the same timeline as other people. I can go to bed without worrying about somebody else. I don’t have to ask for anyone’s approval. I have more time for the things I love doing. I am not being emotionally abused or taken for granted or cheated on, which were common themes in my past relationships. It’s a treat, until I am once again hooked by the media I consume and made to think that there’s more to life than being alone.

Maybe it’s the fact that I spent half of this year trying to get over the one I thought was the love of my life, or how I’m spending the other half denying to myself that I may be having feelings for a person and consciously running away from them through various coping mechanisms I never thought I’d use. Love is a gray area right now because I don’t see myself being in a relationship anytime soon, but if I ever do, I’d want something serious. I love meeting new people right now, but at the same time, my comfort zone feels good. I find that it helps tone down my anxiety when I am in control. I’m proud of myself for choosing to navigate through life by my own right now, turning down people who want to become a part of it for my sake and theirs. I just have a lot on my plate. Although I do believe that I’ll never be ready. No one ever is, but I want to put my faith in timing. I just have to learn the ropes here first. I hate that everyone around me is rushing because I feel like I’m that person being squeezed into the middle of the crowd in a mosh pit. I am choosing to make sure I am a better person than I was first before I dive into it, head first.

So yeah. Lloyd Dobler is not going to blast In Your Eyes by Pete Gabriel on a boombox outside my bedroom window (though I’d love Closing Time by Semisonic more). Dylan Harper is not going to organize a flash mob to tell me he made a mistake. Patrick Verona is not going to hack into the school speakers and sing to me at the football field. Troy Bolton is not going to show up outside my window to apologize, armed with Margherita pizza and chocolate covered strawberries. Ted is not going to steal a blue french horn for me. Johnny Castle is not going to dance with me in front of everybody to prove our love. Chuck Bass is not going to buy me a ring and carry it around even when we aren’t together anymore, hoping for the chance to get me back. Augustus Waters is not going to show up with orange tulips and a trip to Amsterdam. Pat Soltano is not going to run after me with a love letter he wrote a week ago...and I’m okay with it. I don’t want to buy into the notion that I need saving, or that I can be swayed by gestures that can so easily be just a move to win me over with no follow-through. I don’t want to be put on a pedestal, anyway. Also...sometimes, it’s in the little things. We fall in love with the way people remember something we said to them months ago, the way they show up after a long day, and the way even the tiniest gestures feel so big it fills up everything else.

I feel like one day I’ll be given the love I deserve and I don’t have to yearn for movie scenes like the art geek I am. You see, what makes love stories unique is the fact that it happens when you least expect it. Grand romantic gestures are welcome, but they aren’t really the basis of how deep love could be. I could only hope to be with someone who speaks my love language or at least tries to understand it. Until then...I’ll keep relearning everything until I make sense of what I truly want out of love and its intricate mess of a web.

I’ll love; even without pretense, without hope or agenda, without expecting the universe to give me back everything like it owes me.

#daily life blog posts #romance #romantic movies #silver linings playbook #random thoughts #marielle fatima #mariellewritesalot #october 2019

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a-winchester-fairytale · 5 years

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Killing Christmas

Summary: The brothers pick up a case where 5 murders occurred in one night at a Christmas party. The case turns personal when Dean and Y/N become victims of the supernatural and time is running out.

Word Count: 3,309

Warnings: Canon Violence, mention of murders and suicide, relationship fighting, anger, angst

A/N: This was written for @katymacsupernatural Christmas Gone Wrong challenge. I appreciate the extra time to get this finished. I hope you enjoy how it turned out. I also included a prompt in bold for @winchesterprincessbride "Jen Says What" Challenge. As I was writing this story I thought the two of them fit perfect together.

Please feel free to let me know what you think.

“And you think this is a case?” Dean asked Sam, pulling the laptop screen to face him. Sam shrugged.

“We have looked into less.” He answered simply. Dean pursed his lips and looked through the article on the screen. You let your hands slide down around his neck to the center of his chest as you bent down to read over his shoulder.

“Five girls killed their significant others at a Christmas party on the same night, and they can’t see any other connection between them? If that isn’t a case of supernatural interference, it must have been one hell of a party.” You teased, kissing Dean on the check before standing back up.

“Okay, let’s check it out.” Dean agreed, shoving the computer back to his brother.

Four hours later, the three of you unloaded your bags into the Blue Elves Motel in Rockville, Minnesota.

“Why don’t you and Dean go talk to the home owner? I’m going down to the sheriff’s office to see if I can get any more information from them.” Sam suggested.

You and Dean pulled up to a two story home in a nice upscale neighborhood. A police tape was still hanging over the edge of the front door, but workers were starting to resume their normal duties. You followed Dean up to the house, noticing a van parked around the side of the property with Rockville Décor written on the side panel.

“Good afternoon. My name is Dean Weston and this is my partner Y/N.” Dean began, holding up his FBI badge for the maid to see. “Can we please speak with the owner of the house?”

The maid nodded, stepping aside to allow the two of you access to the foyer. Within moments a woman in her early 40’s stepped into the room and greeted you both. You engaged Mrs. Follen in the details of the night of her annual Christmas party while Dean glanced around, keeping one ear open to what she was saying.

“It was just like any other night, until about 11:00 and then I heard screaming near the bar area.” She began, leading you both into a den with an old mahogany bar in the far corner. “When I came in, I saw our neighbor stabbing her husband in the chest with a serving knife over there. Next to the patio doors, my husband work colleague had used a broken bottle to cut her fiancé’s throat. There was blood everywhere and people were running away, practically trampling each other. It was horrible.” She continued, obviously shaken.

You watched as Dean looked around the end of the bar where the first victim was killed, running his hand along the edge of the wood and taking a mental inventory of the bottles behind the counter.

“I told the bartender to call 911, and by the time the police arrived, three more people were killed. One was lying face down in the pool out back, drown. Another was pushed down the stairs in the foyer and broke his neck. The last was run over on the front lawn.” Mrs. Follen told you, her hand pointing at the door and then falling weakly by her side. She closed her eyes and shook her head like she was trying to remove the pictures from her mind, but you knew that she would be living with those images for a long time to come.

“I’m so sorry you have to go through this again.” You offered, sympathetically touching her hand. She took a deep breath and nodded. “Can you remember anything else right before that happening? Any strange behavior in any of the guests, strange smells, or cold spots where there shouldn’t be?” You prompted.

“No, nothing comes to mind. There were so many people here that night that I barely had a chance to stand still though.”

“What about the servants?” Dean asked, coming closer to where the two of you stood. “Did you hire outside help that would have had access to the food, drinks, etc that you wouldn’t normally have here?”

“Do you think this was poison?” She asked instead of answering.

“We just want to be sure to cover all the bases.” Dean replied.

“Well, I hire a catering company to help with the oeuvres and servers, but I have used that same company for years.” She replied. “I could get you their card if that would help.”

“Thank you.” You answered. Mrs. Follen went to the desk drawer and pulled out a business card from the top, handing it back to you.

“Mrs. Follen, we are almost ready for the tree. Where would you like us to put your personal ornaments?” A young man asked.

“Please excuse me for a moment.” She said, following him back out into the foyer.

“You’re thinking witches, aren’t you?” You asked when she was out of hearing range. Dean shrugged, his brow scrunching up at the thought.

“It would make the most sense, but I haven’t found any hex bags anywhere.” He answered. “I hate witches.” He mumbled and you laughed.

“If there is a witch, I don’t think it is her. She seems genuinely upset about the whole thing.” You told him, glancing back over your shoulder when you heard footsteps approaching.

“Hey, check this out.” Dean exclaimed, taking your hand and pulling you to him as he smiled and pointed up at the doorway.

You glanced up to see mistletoe hanging above and shook your head. “Come on, Dean. Be serious.” You whispered.

“I am. It’s supposed to be good luck, ya know. I think we could all use a little good luck with this one.” He added, leaning toward you. With one more quick glance over your shoulder to make sure Mrs. Follen hadn’t returned, you smiled and kissed Dean.

“Only you would find this romantic.” You teased him, giving him one more peck on the lips before stepping away, letting your hand gently slip out of his. Dean just chuckled.

Within moments Mrs. Follen returned to join you both. “I apologize. The Rockville Décor company arrived just before you came to collect their Christmas decorations that they set up for the party. I should have returned them yesterday, but the police wouldn’t allow anyone to move anything until they had finished taking pictures.” She rambled a bit.

“I understand. We will let you get back to your work.” You told her. “This is my card if you think of anything else, please don’t hesitate to call.”

She followed you both to the door and thanked you again before the two of you walked back to the impala.

Sam adjusted the edges of his jacket before stepping into the station and asking to speak with the Sherriff. A man 20 years his elder stepped out of the office as soon as he heard Sam introduce himself as FBI and waved Sam into the office.

“For once, I can honestly say I’m glad to see the FBI come in on a case. I’m Sherriff Harper. This one is a weird one.” He began as he shuffled some papers away to make room for Sam to sit down.

“Oh, yeah? How so?”

“Well, for starters, who kills their significant other at a Christmas party I ask you?” The Sherriff said as Sam sat down across from his desk. “We can’t make hide nor hair of it. This kind of thing just doesn’t happen in Rockville.”

“The report I read said that you couldn’t find any connection between the victims.” Sam lead the conversation and the Sherriff shook his head. He took off his hat and laid it down on the desk, running a shaky hand through his hair.

“No sir. Not a one.” He replied. “Two of the couples are in their 50’s, both married, but one lives here and the other lives about two hours away and didn’t know anyone except the host. There was a coworker’s son, who brought his fiancé to the party, then there’s the neighbor’s teenage son who brought his girlfriend that he had been dating for a few months, and last we have the couple that apparently met at the party and didn’t know each other before that night.” Sherriff Harper explained, laying out the folders for each of the victims in front of Sam as he did.

“And what about the women? Did they say anything to you or the arresting officers?”

“No one said a word that I know of. They just sat down next to the body and didn’t move until the officers came and put them in handcuffs.” He said, once more shaking his head and brushing his hair back.

“I’d like to talk with them, just to see if I can get any further information from them.” Sam replied after looking through the files.

“Didn’t they tell you?” Sherriff Harper asked, surprised. Sam raised his eyebrows and tilted his head.

“Tell me what?” He asked, hesitantly.

“They are all dead.” Sherriff Harper stated bluntly. “That’s the weirdest part of the whole thing. It was like they combusted on the inside or something. Coroner said their insides just burnt up. I heard of being mad, but never so mad you set your insides ablaze.”

The three of you pored over the files and lore books you had brought with you to the motel room, but none of them had given any clues as to what could have caused this. After describing what the Sherriff had told him, Sam left no doubt in either of you that he had been correct about this being a case.

Occasionally you and Dean would bicker about something to do with the case. The longer the three of you did research, the more annoyed you got with everything Dean did or said. Convinced it was just being cooped up and frustrated about not finding any answers, you finally declared you were taking a break to shower and change clothes for the night.

“Well, I knew the honeymoon phase couldn’t last forever.” Sam mumbled.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“Come on, you two have be nauseatingly happy all the time. Relationships just don’t work that way. People bicker occasionally.” Sam explained, to which Dean simply rolled his eyes.

“And what makes you the expert?” He asked bitterly.

Sam just turned away and went back to his computer. He knew Dean was only sulking and no amount of talking would change that. The only thing that could fix his sour mood at this point was for the two of you to make up.

“I’m going to go get us some dinner and bring it back. When she gets out of the shower, be nice.” Sam warned him. Dean rolled his eyes but threw his keys to Sam instead of flinging another sarcastic retort.

When Sam returned to the hotel, he was shocked to hear yelling coming from the hotel room the three of you rented. He glanced around, grabbing his gun and headed toward the door. When he heard a crashing sound, he burst through the door, his gun raised in defense.

“Whoa!” He heard Dean exclaim, holding up his hands as you lifted up a chair above you head to throw at him. “What the hell has gotten into you?”

“Y/N?” Sam said, putting his gun down and grabbing the chair from your hands just before you could swing at Dean. He grabbed your arms and you struggled against Sam, yelling at him to let you go. “Dean, what did you do?” Sam asked, holding you down.

“I don’t know. We were fine one minute and then we started bickering about stupid crap and she just started that.” Dean said, anger and confusion in his voice.

“I want to throat-punch you so bad right now.” You screamed at Dean over Sam’s shoulder.

“Go ahead, Sweetheart.” Dean challenged.

“Not helping.” Sam told him. “Just go for a drive or something, Dean.”

Dean scoffed, but jerked the keys out of Sam’s hand and stormed out of the door. Sam turned, grabbing you by the shoulders and forcing you to sit down on the edge of the bed. You tried to calm down, but your blood was still boiling and all you could think about was going after Dean.

“And, you….what is going on around here?” Sam was asking you, trying to make you talk to him.

“I don’t, I don’t know. I just can’t stop being angry.” You stammered, your eyes pleading with Sam to help you as you looked up into his face. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me Sam. All I know is, and I can’t even believe I’m saying this, but I want to hurt him, like really physically hurt him. I can’t make it stop.”

“Okay, you have to tell me what happened when the two of you went to that house. Tell me everything.” Sam insisted.

You took a deep breath and rubbed the tears from your eyes as your heart rate started to slow down. You felt Sam timidly start to relax his hold on you, obviously unsure how much control you had over your actions.

“She led us through the house to the bar room telling us what happened that night, pretty much the same stuff she told the police beforehand. I kept asking her questions and Dean searched for hex bags or anything out of place. That’s it. There wasn’t anything out of the ordinary that we could find.” You explained.

“Was anyone else there?”

“Just some people picking up the Christmas decorations – some company called…..Rockville Décor.” You replied, slowly remembering the name painted on the side of the van.

“Can I trust you to stay here?” Sam asked you. You nodded.

Dean pulled up to the front of what looked like a storage facility and put the impala in park. Sam climbed out of the passenger seat and Dean followed behind him. The bell on the front door signaled their arrival and a teenage girl promptly appeared behind the counter to greet them.

“What can I do for you?” She asked, her gum smacking as she looked them over.

“I’m Sam and this is my partner Dean. We are with the FBI and we need to speak with the owner.” Sam replied as they both flashed their badges.

“You’re going to need a lot more than that badge if you want to talk to the owner.” She replied mildly sarcastic.

“Like what?” Dean challenged.

“Like a Ouija board.” She smarted back at him. “She died, bout a month ago.”

“Son of a bitch.” Dean muttered under his breath and Sam shot him a reprimanding look.

“Mind if I ask how she died?”

“Well….” The girl began, glancing around to make sure no one else was inside before continuing. “She locked herself and her husband’s lover in the house and set it on fire around them.”

“Really.” Sam stated thoughtfully. ”That explains why the women died the way they did.” He whispered to Dean.

“I always thought she was a little crazy to begin with, but I guess once she caught him kissing some other girl under the mistletoe she snapped.” She added with a shrug.

“Sam, that’s it.” Dean said, turning to face him. “I kissed Y/N under the mistletoe at that house. That has to be what’s going on.” He added, forgetting that the teenager was there momentarily.

“We are going to need to see all the decorations that were used at the Follen house. Can you get those for us?” Sam asked. The girl looked back and forth between them, debating whether to press the issue and then turned to go into the back room.

A few moments later, she came out carrying a key. “They just unloaded them all into storage locker B. Its around the corner. Do you need me to show you?”

“No, thanks. I think we can manage.” Sam replied with a smile, taking the key from her outstretched hand.

They drove the impala around the corner to the front of the storage unit and opened the trunk. Armed with a shotgun full of rock salt and an iron club they proceeded to open the metal garage door to reveal a 10x10 room full of boxes.

“This is going to take all day.” Dean grumbled, setting the iron club down in the doorway and pulling open the first box he came to.

After about an hour of combing through the boxes, they realized they were getting close when the ghost appeared shoving Dean backwards away from the box he was digging through. Sam shot her with the rock salt and she disappeared.

“She’ll be back.” He called out to Dean who lifted the box and dumped the contents on the floor in front of him. He pushed away a few items and pulled out the mistletoe.

“Sam, look out!” He yelled, pointing to where she had reappeared. Sam spun around and once more blasted her away with the shotgun.

Dean pulled out his lighter and set the mistletoe on fire as Sam reloaded the shotgun to prepare for another attack. They both heard her screams and turned to see her dissipate in a ball of fire along with the mistletoe that she had been attached to.

“You okay?” Sam asked as they walked back out to the impala. Dean nodded, but he didn’t seem as relieved as Sam thought he should have been. Instead he was quiet and climbed into the driver’s seat with a worried look on his face.

“What if this didn’t work?” Dean asked. “Or worse, what if we are too late?”

Sam sighed, leaning back against the leather seat. “Don’t worry. If this didn’t put things back the way they were, we will figure something else out. I won’t give up.” Sam promised him.

“I can’t lose her, Sammy. I just can’t.” Dean replied, twirling his key ring between his fingers, refusing to look up at him.

“I know.” Sam answered. “It will be okay.”

Dean sniffed once and then let out a deep breath, reaching out and starting the impala to head back to the hotel. He didn’t say much on the drive back, too lost in his own thoughts as the miles ticked by. When they finally arrived at the motel and parked the car, Dean hesitated and Sam waited patiently.

“Think she still wants to kill me?” Dean asked aloud, trying to make it sound like a joke.

“There’s only one way to find out.” Sam played along, gesturing to the motel room door. Dean huffed a chuckle and got out of the car.

As he did, the door to the motel room opened and you stepped outside. Both of the brothers stood frozen, waiting to see what you would do.

“Dean, I’m so sorry.” You said and his shoulders relaxed. “I don’t know what happened, I just couldn’t control it.” You stammered.

“I know, sweetheart. It’s okay.” Dean said, stepping forward and wrapping you up into his arms. He kissed your lips, relieved to have everything back to normal.

“Here we go again.” Sam teased, rolling his eyes and walking past the two of you to gather his things from inside the motel room.

You laughed, but Dean just pretended not to hear him and squeezed you tighter.

“Let’s go home.” He suggested.

“Gladly.” You replied. “Besides, I wanted to decorate a little before Christmas gets here. Maybe we can hang some mistletoe in the bunker like….” You started to tease him.

“NO!” Both of them shouted at the same time, cutting you off.

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travllingbunny · 5 years

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The 100 rewatch: 4x04 A Lie Guarded

This episode has some interesting moments, mostly those where characters have morality debates and try to be a moral compass and make the other question the approach they’ve chosen: Kane to Octavia – for getting too prone to violence and murder; Monty (and kind of Jasper) to Clarke – for maybe going too far in trying to act according to the Big Picture and Head over Heart principle and becoming more like the Ark leadership that they all used to hate; in order to save people; Raven and Nyko to Luna – for again almost opting to stay away and not help save people.

It also kills of one of my favorite minor characters, has a minor fake-out death of a secondary character, and a big fake-out death of a main character, and escalates hostilities between two groups of people again.

It’s one of the weaker episodes of the season, because it has a few things that really don’t make sense, including two instances of character behavior that is clearly plot-driven, and one instance of extreme Plot Armor.

According to a tweet from one of the staff (thanks, The 100 wiki), the title comes from the quote “An excuse is worse and more terrible than a lie, for an excuse is a lie guarded." It doesn’t say who it comes from, though Google says it’s by Alexander Pope. This clearly refers to the lie that Clarke told previously when she told people in Arkadia that everyone will be saved, and didn’t tell them that only 100 people would probably be (unless they manage to find the Nightblood solution to save everyone), and the fact that her attempts to explain things only made people more upset.

But it’s also a spoilery pun (this never even occurred to me until I saw someone on YouTube point it out) - “ALIE guarded”, because the group that’s on the mission to find Becca’s lab (Abby, Raven, Jackson, Luna, Nyko, Miller, one redshirt guy, and for some reason Murphy and Emori) runs into ALIE’s drones that start shooting at them and kill two people.

Luna is the character that I have changed my opinion the most on rewatch. I used to really like her, because her rejection of violence and rebellion against the Grounder warlike way of life, so I was really shocked when she had what seemed to be a sudden complete 180 turn similar to the one that often happens with characters on The Walking Dead – from being against killing to “DIE DIE Kill everyone!” But now I see that this turn was foreshadowed from the start, and that she had already shown the tendency to be judgmental of humans in general in a way that’s nihilistic and misanthropic. Here, for instance, she says: “What if the fight is all we are? We torture, kill, betray. We pretend we're more than that just to make ourselves feel better, but it's a lie.” Jasper wrote something similar in his letter, but he didn’t decide to kill everyone. She also asks Raven if she thinks she/they deserve to survive. This is something different from the way Kane or Abby talked about “deserving to survive” – they said that as an incentive for people to be better, while Luna is saying people maybe should not be saved. It’s not the first time she decided to stay away and not get involved to save people, which is her right, but also doesn’t make her such a great person. I know she has been very traumatized and lost everyone she loved. But if your reasoning is: I won’t make an effort to save people, because they’re not good enough to deserve saving, there is something seriously wrong with you.

Nyko tries to talk to her and convince her to give blood so they could try to synthesize Nightblood, saying “those are good people”, and she asks him what they would do if she refuses to do it to save them. Nyko points out she would be doing it to “save us all”. But then the drones attack, and he gets killed saving her, making himself a shield for the bullets – no doubt that was not just to save another person, but because she is the key to saving everyone. Luna still doesn’t want to donate blood, so Raven – who herself has been prone occasionally to self-righteousness of that kind – tells her that no one will forcibly take the blood from her, but begs her to give it on her own will to help: “It’s not your blood that defines you, it’s your heart” – and she finally gets through to her. For now.

Raven still doesn’t trust Murphy and thinks he’s an opportunistic jerk, but she changes her mind a little after Murphy saves her from the drones.

There’s some setup for the plotline with Emori in the upcoming episodes – as we find out she is afraid of something and not too happy to go to Becca’s lab. We also find out that “Frikdreina” is what Grounders call those with genetic mutations/deformities.

In Arkadia, things start in a light-hearted way, Jasper’s prank on Jaha – he managed to get him asleep, probably with some of the stuff he and Monty liked, and put him a raft in the middle of the lake, where Jaha woke up to Jasper laughing and telling “Chancellor, you’ve been floated”. This is a way for the Delinquents to channel their resentment of their former Chancellor, who executed so many people and sent them to probably die as expendable people, in a harmless joke.

There’s also a friendly scene between Clarke and Monty, where Clarke is concerned about Bellamy not being back, and Monty telling her not to worry. But things deteriorate when Jasper and Monty, setting up a silly prank on Clarke, end up finding the List. Jasper is angry and compares Clarke to the former Ark leadership, calling her “Jaha-lite”. When he tries to tell everyone through the radio, Clarke has him electrocuted and arrested. Monty is more understanding, even though Jasper told him that he (Monty) was not on the list, and he’s also not happy that Harper is not – he realizes why she had to leave him off, but he thinks she is indeed becoming like the hated former Ark leadership – lying to people, keeping secrets, arresting her friends. Clarke admits that Jaha used to be everyone she hated, but that she’s now starting to understand him to a point. It’s a very morally complicated situation, because they are right, but at the same time, that list had to be made, someone had to make it, and Raven gave Clarke that responsibility – and now Clarke is getting the blame for it. And she – or anyone who made that list – was going to get blamed no matter what: they were going to leave people out of it; if they left out their friends, that is cold hearted and their friends would resent them, if they put their friends on it, it would make them look biased and get everyone else to resent them. Clarke’s choices are completely understandable, but also unhealthy for her - she is taking on all on herself and losing her morality and emotional health to ensure people’s survival, but she has to stop before going too far.

Monty ends up reading the list to everyone and causing a lot of anger in the crowd. People start questioning her about everything, from why she left this or that person out (Harper, for instance, because of a genetic disorder her father died of, Monty because they already had other engineers), from supposedly “putting herself on the list”, and one guy is like “Bellamy Blake? Really?” He obviously is someone from the Ark who has no idea what Bellamy meant to the Delinquents, or how instrumental he was in defeating the Mountain Men and saving the people form Mount Weather, but I guess he is not related to one of the Delinquents so he doesn’t care. He probably thinks that Clarke being important is acceptable because she’s the former Chancellor/Council member’s daughter, but Bellamy was just a janitor, right? But then Jaha intercepts and shows one of his main talents – doing talking to the crowd. He explains that Clarke and Bellamy are important because good leadership is necessary, and promises everyone that they would get rid of the list and instead hold a lottery to determine who survives. Jaha has both proved himself useful and saved the moment, and somehow made himself the decision-maker again. When Clarke later tells him that lottery is risky as they may end up without doctors etc., he points out that this was necessary to motivate people (note that he never says they would honor his promise), because people, understandably, hate hearing that they’re expendable and that they have no value. “That’s not what I said” – “That’s what they heard”.(No matter how different Jaha and Bellamy are, they both share the ability to talk to the crows and gauge their emotional reactions, something Kane is terrible at, and that Clarke is not that good at. Abby has never even tried.)

In Polis, Kane has a serious conversation with Octavia, warning her that she’s become a bit too murdery. He calls her out on killing the looter to make him a scapegoat, and says she didn’t have to kill him or the Trishanakru Ambassador Rafel, or Pike. Octavia says Pike got what he deserved, and Kane points out the difference between revenge and justice. Hmm, I have to say that killing Rafel, while being immoral, could be argued to be necessary? He was going to fight and probably kill Roan, who was still recuperating, and that would have had really bad consequences. But there’s no doubt that Octavia is enjoying a chance to murder people a bit too much, and that using violence to solve all problems is her thing. But she is not comfortable listening to Kane morally judging her – something that also caused her behavior towards him in 6x01, when she was preemptively verbally attacking him because she was expecting his judgment.

But it turns out that Roan also isn’t a guarantee of peace and alliance, either. Echo has captured Bellamy and another guy called Stevens, off-screen (presumably with her people, the same way she confronted Octavia later, since I don’t see a way how she, with her sword, could capture Bellamy and another guy with guns), Roan forces Kane to tell him the truth about what the Sky people have been doing, and decides to break the alliance and go to war against them and Trikru, and take over Arkadia as a shelter, although Kane insists it’s just plan B. Roan thinks they lied to him and suspects that the Nightblood solution is a cover for trying to make another Commander behind his back, since he doesn’t really trust Octavia about the Flame being destroyed. At least he smartly got that right, though he is actually wrong about the rest of it.

The first victims of Roan’s decision are Trikru warriors in Polis, even though they didn’t even know anything about what was going on between Sky people and Roan. Octavia, looking for Indra finds many of them killed. There’s a moment where she thinks she sees Indra’s dead body, but it’s someone else. (Not the only time season 4 does this – we had a similar fake-out in 4x11 with Monty and Harper.) She goes to Arkadia to warn her people. Roan sends Echo to stop her and capture her, but Octavia won’t come and defends herself. Echo is trying to take her alive and she genuinely seems a bit upset/sad when she ends up stabbing Octavia, and Octavia falls down a very high cliff. I guess she’s interested in Bellamy enough already, and fears that constantly killing his loved ones is not going to help that potential relationship happen. Both Echo and Roan are a bit uncomfortable when they have to tell Bellamy the news. There’s a scene where Bellamy cries and breaks down, thinking his sister is dead, set to sad and emotional music. But guess what, end of episode twist - Octavia is alive.

Sorry, but the Azgeda war paint looks really silly. Is it supposed to look scary? It looks like a cross between a clown and a panda.

There are several things in this episode that really don’t make sense:

Clarke not putting Monty on the list – I feel like this happened just to show how Clarke is willing to not put her friends on the list (the conflict between her and Monty could have been just about Harper, but Harper and Clarke are not as close as Monty and Clarke, and Jasper wants to die anyway), but I’m supposed to believe that Clarke doesn’t think Monty is one of the 97 people in Arkadia most useful and important for survival? (I say 97, because Clarke would have put Bellamy and Octavia on the list no matter what – the latter because Bellamy would never forgive her if Octavia was not on the list.) Monty is probably one of the 5 most important people – he’s a genius, not just an engineer but someone who grows plants and can ensure food; Clarke was aware of his talents even in early season 1, and he will ,of course, prove to be arguably the most important person for everyone’s survival.

Jasper and Monty accusing Clarke of putting herself on the list – they really didn’t notice that “Clarke Griffin” was written in a different handwriting from the rest of the names? Come on!

Riley is now starting to get shoved into scenes in a way that doesn’t make too much sense, like being given important tasks. This guy had been a slave and mistreated until very recently, why isn’t he resting and getting therapy or something?

And of course, Octavia’s extreme Plot Armor – surviving the stab wound, I could believe, but after falling from that cliff, she is not only alive, but hasn’t broken her spine, or even leg, and is able to mount on the horse and ride to Arkadia?

Body count:

Stevens, Arker killed by Echo, who kills him with Bellamy right next to him and watching

A guard from the Ark, killed by a drone

Nyko, one of my favorite minor characters – I guess the show can’t let someone so nice and reasonable live

A number of Trikru warriors, killed by Azgeda, because we haven’t had any mass murders so far in the season, and we have to fill the quota of 2-3 mass deaths per season.

Two Azgeda warriors who were with Echo, and tried to capture Octavia, killed by Octavia

Rating: 6.5/10

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bethhxrmon · 5 years

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All I Ask of You Pt. 27

“Let me be your freedom, let daylight dry your tears, I’m here, with you, beside you” - “All I Ask of You” from The Phantom of the Opera

Pairing: Peter Parker x Female OC

Word Count: 2.8k

Summary: Some more road tripping!!!

Warnings: Cussing, some slight emotional stuff, the norm

A/N: Heyyyyy, I hope you guys are enjoying this, as always feel free to tell me what you think. And you can find the masterlist for the series in my bio!

“Can we please, please, please listen to a musical? Just one, the whole way there, I won’t ask again,” Annie begged.

“Nope. Driver gets to pick the music,” Tony replied as they continued down the interstate.

After a decent continental breakfast, they were all back on the road. It took Annie sitting though the same classic rock playlist halfway across Wyoming before she said anything. Which, in reality, had been pretty impressive given it had been the same playlist as the day before.

“Come on, just one? I told my parents it was a theatre camp,” Annie pointed out.

Tony sighed, “And we aren’t even there yet.”

While Annie hadn’t said anything, that didn’t mean the argument was over. Though, it did take her a few moments to formulate a decent plan. It wasn’t that the songs were bad, but she’d heard them more than enough times and the same forty songs was starting to become more and more apparent to her every single time. Didn’t that guy have a different playlist to listen to?

That wasn’t the point, though. The point was that she knew the songs and that she was almost positive that the others knew the songs just as well. What was about to happen was either her dumbest idea or most brilliant. If nothing else, it would give everyone something to do aside from staring at miles and miles of yellow grass and the occasional cow or horse.

She nudged Peter who was starting to doze off again, “What’s that about?”

“If I do something kinda crazy but kinda fun… would you go along with it?” Annie asked.

He nodded slowly, “Yeah, why?”

“‘Cause I’m gonna do something kinda crazy but kinda fun. And if I’m the only one I’ll look like a dumbass, but if everyone joins in then I’m making a point,” she explained.

Peter raised an eyebrow, “And I can’t know ‘cause why?”

“It wouldn’t be as spontaneous.”

Right as the next song came on, Annie started to sing as loudly as she could to the music. She looked over at Peter, hoping that he would catch on. Soon enough they were both singing and Harper and Ned were quick to join in. All of them belting out and not caring about whether or not they were off key. They all tried singing all the parts including the instrumental riffs.

And when Tony didn’t appear to bat an eye at any of them, they all continued singing. Though, Annie was starting to be obnoxious on purpose. It didn’t matter if anyone them had already known the songs beforehand, they had played enough during the trip for any of them to at least know the chorus.

“Are you guys done yet?” Tony asked, finally deciding to say something.

Annie shrugged, “Depends on if we can listen to something else. Otherwise, we’re just getting started, Sir!”

“Okay, will you guys settle down if I change the songs?” Tony asked, starting to sound more exasperated than angry.

After all of them arguing and trying to deliberate over what to listen to, they had gotten nowhere. Annie thought it would have been easy to get everyone to just agree to listen to a musical and then relax and enjoy the open road ahead. Only, it seemed everyone else had other ideas.

“We’re not listening to The Last Five Years, that makes you cry without fail. We should just listen to some nighties alt-rock and call it a day,” Harper insisted.

Tony could still be heard, occasionally putting in his two-cents, “I’m with them.”

“Oh come on! Seussical then?” Annie asked.

Harper shook their head, “Nope. Also makes you cry without fail. This isn’t ‘let’s contribute to Annie’s daily mental breakdown hour’.”

“What if we listened to disco? I think that’d be pretty cool. I mean, it includes a bit of everything, right?” Peter asked, looking between everyone.

Annie raised an eyebrow, “What decent musical came from the disco era?”

“Mamma Mia! You taught me about that one,” Peter pointed out.

Ned had dropped out of the conversation a few minutes ago, and he seemed rather immersed in his phone. What he was doing wasn’t being paid attention to. It was really just Annie and Harper doing most of the debating.

Ned’s head suddenly shot up, “Got it! Hey, Mr. Stark, I’m gonna sync my phone with the car. I got the perfect playlist.”

“Um… except you literally didn’t say anything for most of this,” Harper pointed out, crossing their arms.

Ned grinned, “Except I was listening. I got a little bit of everything. I know what Peter likes, and I think I know which things Annie likes that doesn’t make her cry, and then there was you. You said nighties alt-rock. Which, incidentally is exactly what I listen to all the time. It’s all covered.”

Harper nodded slowly, “Alright, you’re one of those smart and silent types. I can appreciate that.”

“Also, can I just put this out there? Literally anything could make me cry right now. Because, ya know, those daily mental breakdowns,” Annie said, leaning back in her seat.

Pepper, who had been quiet for most of the drive that day, turned around, “You should get mental help for that.”

“Maybe later. You need parental consent for that, don’t you?” Annie asked.

Pepper nodded, “I’m sure they’d be willing to get you help.”

“Except they don’t know what I’d need help for. That’s kind of the real kicker there. They don’t know about the whole powers deal,” she admitted, opening her book again.

Everything settled down and went back to normal with Annie positioned to use Peter as a pillow. She focused on her book and occasionally on the rolling hills of yellow grass. It seemed like everything had settled down. Minus Harper and Ned constantly sounding like they were in a constant debate about something Annie couldn’t quite make out.

That was, until they both started to get louder about the subject that had them both so talkative.

“I’m way more help. Like, if it wasn’t for me, Annie wouldn't even have a suit!” Harper exclaimed.

Ned shook his head, “But you’re not the one who can hack a suit.”

“Don’t gotta hack something if I was the one who made it. Besides, hacking a suit sounds like something you shouldn’t have done. But what do I know? I’m just a college student,” Harper responded nonchalantly.

“Hacking that suit was one of the dumbest things you guys did, for the record,” Tony interjected, trying to stare down Peter and Ned at the same time through the mirror.

Annie smirked, “As if you wouldn’t have hacked a suit for your all-time best friend.”

“Would’ve been a hell of a time. Lots of googling, probably would get arrested, but I wouldn’t have done it for you last year,” Harper admitted.

She nodded slowly, “Fair enough. I was a serious bitch at that point.”

“Okay, how bad were you? Because you keep talking about how awful you are and I’m not seeing it,” Peter said, sitting up so he could get in on the debate.

Harper smirked, “That’s ‘cause you’re in love with her.”

“N-no, we just started dating… th-that’d be weird,” Peter stammered, his face going red.

They shook their head, “Nah, you both got it bad. And I know about Annie’s side of the story. Ned, what do you say?”

“Definitely agree. But also, I’d say aside from being pushy, you’re not that bad,” Ned replied.

Harper laughed, “You really didn’t tell them about anything, did you?”

“Well, you see, it wasn’t necessary. And there was, like, that one time I said I was worse than Flash… but that was also before he tried beating the shit out of Peter. Now, I was never that bad,” Annie explained.

Tony nearly hit the brakes on the car in the middle of the highway, “Who tried beating the shit out of Peter?”

Annie pretended like she hadn’t seen Peter shake his head, “Well, you see, Ned was sick and Flash was being a jerk about Peter being the lead in the musical. And I didn’t know he was trans at the time, but then Flash outed him and tried to beat him up. And, well, I couldn’t do a whole lot. I didn’t wanna electrocute the dude, but I was close.”

“Pete, why didn’t you tell me?” Tony asked.

He shrugged, sinking back into his seat, “Never mentioned it… um… besides, Annie took care of it.”

“You’re telling me you could’ve gotten Tony Stark on that dude and you didn’t?!” Harper exclaimed, facepalming.

Peter huffed, “This wasn’t about me, this was about Annie.”

“Way to throw me under the bus, Pete,” Annie replied with a teasing smirk, “Anyways, you guys know how I was at a performing arts school, right? So, the fall production was The Sound of Music and I was the understudy for Liesel. Which was great, except the girl who played Liesel was actually the worst-”

“Because you have room to talk?” Harper asked.

Annie rolled her eyes, “Anyways, like I was saying, that girl was kinda mean and I wasn’t gonna take that. So I sabotaged her dressing room by electrocuting one of the electrical sockets. It basically ruined the room and that girl was convinced she’d been messed with, but there was no proof, ya know, because I used my powers that no one knew about. And she left so I ended up getting the part.”

“And this is where things get great,” Harper commented.

She sighed, “Okay, I get it, I did some stuff. Anyways, you guys’ve seen Mean Girls, right?”

Peter and Ned nodded.

“Okay, then you might see where this is headed. So the girl who I replaced in the show was basically the Gretchen of the group, right? And I ended up swooping in and replacing her in her own friend group. Which was great… I mean, not great, probably sucked for her. And I kinda did half of this for some kinda cute guy… um… I’ll get into that later. But I think that explains enough already,” she explained.

Peter looked at Annie, “You’re joking, right?”

“Nah, I mean, if we’re being real here, I caused the fire because that Darren guy was trying to kill me and Tina. So… I mean, I did the first thing I could think of, and there was a different problem. Except I wasn’t expecting to be blown back and… um, yeah, I think I’m done,” Annie trailed off, looking down at her hands.

Harper smiled a little, “Hey, that whole blowing up the room thing was still pretty damn iconic.”

“And arson. By all rights I should turn you in,” Tony called back.

Annie grimaced, “Yeah, maybe so, but then you’d wanna turn Peter and Ned over here if half of what Peter told me about trying to fight that vulture dude.”

“Touche,” Tony replied.

Pepper sighed, “He was only joking. If we thought you guys were gonna run around blowing things up for no reason, I don’t think he’d be driving you kids around for this long.”

Once again, the drive settled down, even though there hadn’t been a definitive answer to whether Harper or Ned was the better superhero assistant. A topic which would probably would never get answered.

Eventually it got late and Tony pulled off at Wendover, a small town right between Utah and Nevada. It was fine for everything except for the fact that everyone’s phones were an hour off from each other. They were right on the line for where the time change was.

It made for some fun conversations later in the night when Annie was sprawled out on her bed, completely immersed in her book. Whereas Harper had been trying to get some sleep for the last fifteen minutes.

Harper eventually turned off the lights, only for Annie to use her powers to turn it back on without batting an eye. She heard Harper grumbling as they reached out to turn off the light. Annie only turned it back on. The process continued a few more times.

“Look, I know you’re going all insomniac on me, but I need sleep. It’s midnight,” Harper whined.

Annie looked at her phone, “Nah, it’s only eleven.”

“Not according to the clock right here. Now either leave the room or go to bed,” they grumbled before turning out the light.

Annie sighed a little bit. She wasn’t in any mood to get out of the room. Her hair was tied up in a messy bun, and when she looked at herself in the mirror earlier, she had serious bags under her eyes. How in the world Peter hadn’t said anything about her, she had no idea. Not to mention that she hadn’t changed her leggings or her sweatshirt that advertised her old school’s theatre program. She wasn’t planning on it either, but still she knew that she wasn’t going to get to sleep anytime soon.

After getting into her slippers, Annie grabbed her book and the key before seeing her phone had a text notification.

Spidey: Fifth floor, vending machines

Annie saw that the message was from five minutes before. She tried to wrack her brain to figure out what Peter wanted. It could have been anything. Something from him wanting to get a midnight snack together to needing something to talk about.

Still, Annie got into the elevator, pressing on the five and waited for the elevator to do its job. After a few seconds, Annie was there and it was just a matter of finding the vending machines and Peter. Thankfully, there were a few signs and Annie saw one pointing to where the vending machines were.

That was when she saw Peter pacing around the hallway and his eyes were darting all over the place. After a few seconds, he saw Annie and ran right to her, wrapping his arms around her tightly. She dropped the book, hearing the thick paperback hit the carpet with a soft thud so she could hug him.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Annie asked, hearing his ragged breathing.

Peter pulled back a little, looking at her with his eyes full of tears, “I-I… I was tryna sleep a-a-a-and I did a-a-a-a-a-a-a-and th-the building… it fell a-and I-I couldn’t br-br-”

“Hey, it’s okay, you’re okay, no buildings are falling. You’re alright, Peter, it’s okay. Do you wanna sit down?” she asked, picking up her book and leading the way to the stairwell.

Peter nodded, following Annie through the door to get to the stairs. Annie sat down on one of the landings and Peter sat next to her, laying his head in her lap. She frowned a little, gently running her fingers through his hair. The last time she had seen him so shaky and scared was when Flash had hurt him.

Annie bit her lip, trying to think of what to say, “Do you wanna talk about it?”

“Y-yeah, ya know how I’ve told you about Vulture?” Peter asked.

She nodded slowly, “Yeah, what about it?”

“Well, I-I didn’t tell you about what he did… that night I really fought with him and stuff. H-he used one of his weapons to make his warehouse collapse and it fell on me… all of it. If I didn’t have powers, I woulda died… a-and it’s less of a thing now, but every once in awhile… well I dream about it. S-sorry, you were probably asleep and I woke you up. I just… didn’t wanna be alone,” he rambled, sitting up.

Annie frowned, her eyebrows furrowing as she reached out and pulled him into a hug, “I wasn’t asleep. A-and I get it. The nightmares, I mean. But you weren’t bothering me. If I was asleep, I wouldn’t be here.”

Peter didn’t say anything and instead rested his head in the crook of Annie’s neck. They stayed like that for awhile. While Annie could hear slot machines from the lower floor, Peter seemed to calm down. It was a miracle no one had decided to go up the stairs.

After a little longer, Peter looked up at Annie, “You should probably get some sleep.”

“I’m not tired,” Annie claimed, though she did feel her eyelids starting to droop.

Peter smiled a bit, kissing the top of her head, “You’re exhausted, come on, lemme take you to your room.”

It took some more of Annie being stubborn on the subject before Peter helped her up and they went up the other few flights of stairs between their floors. The whole time, Peter didn’t let go of her hand. Though, when they were in front of her room, they held each other for what felt like a long time.

“Well, I guess this is goodnight,” Annie murmured before quickly Peter on the lips.

Peter was caught slightly off guard, “I- um… yeah, goodnight.”

With that, Annie unlocked her room and was half-tempted to wake up Harper just to be ornery, but decided against it before flopping on her bed to go to sleep.

Taglist: @flushings-here / @gaypanda / @ijustdontknowsometimes / @avvengres / @lionsfandomsandbearsohmy / @buzzinglee / @parkerpuff / @lcy-thot / @twilightparker / @moonstruckholland / @dolphinsarecuteandstuff

#peter parker #peter parker imagine #peter parker x you #peter parker x reader #peter parker x oc #spider-man #spider-man x reader #spider-man x oc #spider-man: homecoming #spider-man: far from home #mcu #mcu fanfic #marvel #fanfiction #writing #writeblr #all i ask of you fic

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murphysluv-blog · 7 years

Text

Prompt request #4

Request from anon: can u do a smutty fic with jasper jordan and #10 from the prompt list!

10: “If your serious, show me.”

okay so this is going to be my first smut, and it’s not gonna be super hardcore or anything but i will try my best as always!

Word count: 1,963

Warnings: SmUt and swearing and the usual

You felt like a total loser around everyone else from the 100. Everyone else was constantly getting laid and messing around, and you had never even kissed a boy. Even Monty was getting laid. Occasionally, when everyone was drunk, someone would try to kiss you or sleep with you and you would get too nervous and run away. Immediately regretting it, you just wanted to feel what everyone else was feeling. Tonight, no matter who it was with, you were going to fuck someone. You set that goal for yourself and go to work on your tasks for the day.

“Hey Y/N, are you finally going to drink with us tonight?” Jasper said shooting you a smile.

“Actually, yes. I am looking forward to it.” You say with a nervous smile. God, if they only knew what you planned for tonight.

“Sweet! See you then.” He happily walks away, always having that extra little pep in his step. You giggle and are spun around by an unknown person.

“I have an idea.” The unknown person is Harper, and she has a very giddy grin on her face.

“Oh this can’t be good.” You say looking at her with stressed eyes.

“Okay so I know, you want to-mess around-and I am also aware that Jasper would also like to mess around. Are you following along?” She says with bright eyes and a big smile.

“Wait-me and Jasper-I’ve never thought about him like that.” You spit out, stuttering because of this sudden idea.

“Well, just think about it. I also happen to know, Jasper doesn’t just want to sleep with anyone, he wants to sleep with you.” This announcement brings a slight jump in your heart. Someone who isn’t drunk wanting to sleep with you makes you extremely happy, and the fact that it’s Jasper makes it even better.

“Why me? I’m pretty sure everyone knows I’m a virgin and is not interested.” You say whilst gesturing down towards your body.

“Holy shit your a virgin??” Harper exclaims a little louder than you would have liked.

“Everyone knows that.” You cross your arms, uncomfortable with all the stares you were getting from those who had heard Harper’s recent announcement.

“Um, no. Everyone wants to sleep with you. Everyone.” She emphasizes the everyone and you scoff.

“Bullshit. If everyone wanted to sleep with me, then why am I still a virgin?”

“Honestly, everyone just thinks your um, kind of a prude?” She says sheepishly.

“What?! I’ve been trying to get laid for weeks and I’m not because everyone thinks I’m a prude?” You say, this time your louder than you had hoped for. A few nearby males, including Jasper and Monty, turn and look at you wide eyed.

“Okay well since this convo has taken a turn, I will leave you to be gawked at and presumably asked to sleep with many different guys! Enjoy your new status!” Harper runs away with a loud giggle. Thanks a lot, Harps. Your face turns bright red, as you see Monty and Jasper staring at you, mouths slightly open in shock. Somehow a wave of courage washes over you, and you walk in front of both of them, and say potentially the weirdest thing you have ever said.

“Don’t think of me different. Girls like sex too.” You shrug and turn around, walking back to your work zone.

After a relatively easy day of just rationing and doing random chores around camp, the weekly routine of everyone getting drunk ensues. You can see people gathering around a fire, and people passing cups of moonshine around. You breathe in, and out and walk over to the main crowd. Your eyes scan and look for Jasper. You can’t see him, but you see Harper and push through to her.

“Hey. I have arrived and am looking for my willing participant.” You say jokingly.

“I can see your willing participant, and he is flirting with Octavia.” Harper says grumpily, pointing to an unamused looking Octavia and a drunk Jasper.

“Are you kidding me? I came here to fuck Jasper and now he’s trying to fuck someone else.” You actually whisper that to Harper this time and no one else hears. Harper gives you a sympathetic look and then her eyes light up.

“Oh no.” You groan as Harper shuffles through the crowd and grabs Jasper by the collar. You try and keep your cool, pulling at the fabric of your shirt to relive your nerves. Accidentally pulling your shirt down, and letting some cleavage slip out the top. As Harper stomps Jasper back over to you, you smile.

“Welcome back to where you belong!” Harper says to Jasper pushing him towards you.

“Glad to be back.” He says blushing, looking down at your cleavage quickly, before staring back up at your face.

“Well, I have people to do. Goodbye, friends.” Harper spins off and away towards a group of boys.

“Oh harps. Well, I have people to do as well!” You say, a disappointed look crossing Jaspers face before you grab his hand and pull him along with you towards your tent.

“Woah there, um-are you-” Jasper mumbles grabbing the back of his neck.

“Do you not want to fuck me?” You say flat out. If he didn’t want to, you didn't want to.

“What? No-of course, I really want to but-”

“Okay, then shut up, and come on.” You pull him into your tent and zip it up behind you. You spin around towards a nervous, worried Jasper. You walk up to him and you slowly take your shirt off. You cross your arms and pull the fabric away from your skin, leaving you in just your bra. He breathes in through his teeth and grins. You reach down and pull your pants all the way down quickly this time.

“Come on, your turn.” You say walking closer to him grabbing at the hem of his shirt. He stays silent as he takes short, quick breathes and removes his shirt. He pulls off his shirt and before he can take off his pants all the way you grab him by the neck and kiss him. It wasn’t a warm kiss. It was a needy, deep, lustful kiss and you loved it. As you grabbed the back of his neck and placed your other hand flat on his chest, he got more into the groove of things. He placed his hands around your waist, and began trying to unhook your bra without breaking the kiss. Surprisingly, he succeeds and pulls the straps down your arms. He breaks the kiss for only a moment to admire your breasts.

“God, you are the hottest girl I have ever seen.” He says staring down at you.

“If your serious, show me.” You say seductively, your hormones taking over your body. He starts kissing and sucking on your neck while kneading and playing with your boobs with his hands. You feel short of breath and surprise yourself with a gasp followed by a moan when he sucks harder on your neck.

“Please-oh fuck.” You mumble as he continues to work his lips down your body towards your breasts. He pauses to kick off his pants the rest of the way and he starts to pull down your underwear. His lips meet yours again and you moan into the kiss. You have somehow managed to become pressed against the bed frame and are being pushed towards the bed. You fall back onto the bed, pulling Jasper with you. Your legs are open and his crotch is angled towards you. You continue to make out intensely and you pull at his hair. You reach down and rub his cock through his underwear. He lets out a loud groan and pulls his underwear off. You continue to paw at him and give him a half-way handjob while you kiss.

“Can we-” He takes a deep breathe in, “fuck now?” He is begging with his eyes, but he doesn’t need too, you happily oblige.

“Yes, Oh god, please.” Your a mess underneath his hands, a puddle of oh gods and pleases.

“I know your a virgin, I heard harper this morning. I’ll go easy on you.” He smirks and laughs a little. The fact that he isn’t a virgin is slightly surprising to you, but your relieved at least one of you is sure what your doing. He reaches down and hovers over you, he looks back up at you and begins to kiss you again as he enters you. You let out a deep groan into the kiss, and he pulls his lips away for a second to make sure your okay and fine with this. You nod for him to keep going and he joins your lips again. As he falls into rhythm you throw your head back, already feeling an approaching orgasm. He whispers in your ear, sweet, rough phrases you would never expect him to say. He sure is full of surprises tonight. Your stomach tightens and you feel the sensation starting to spread across your body. He reaches down and grabs at your boobs, kneading them again. This sets you over the edge and you transform into a moaning mess. He follows shortly after, pulling out and cumming on your stomach.

“Fuck-I’m sorry, I didn’t want to cum inside you.” You smile up at him and ‘clean’ yourself off. You fall back on your bed and he falls back next to you.

“I am so glad I know what that feels like now.” You pant out, your body still recovering from the waves of after shock.

“That was so much better than my first time, Your amazing.” He says staring up at the ceiling.

“I’m amazing, or my body is.” You say unconvinced of where his main pleasure was derived from.

“Both. Both are equally amazing and great.” He says pulling your head into his chest. You smile and nestle in, drifting off to sleep.

When you wake up, he’s gone. Your legs feel slightly more shaky then normal, and your glad he ‘went easy’ on you. After getting dressed and rushing off to work. You are greeted with many stares and baffled looks.

“Sex tip number one: cover up the morning after.” Harper slides in to the standing spot next to you. She points to your neck which is covered in a chain of hickeys going from your jaw to past the edge of your shirt.

“Damn it. How am I supposed to cover that.”

“Well, seeing as the whole camp already knows because of a certain someone, It doesn’t matter anymore.” She says nodding her head in the direction of a proud looking Jasper talking to a group of guys, presumably about last nights adventure.

“Great. Time to go listen to what stories he has to tell.” You say as you wonder up behind Jasper. You don’t announce yourself and you remain quiet, hoping to hear what he has to say to his friends.

“Dude, she’s amazing. You wouldn’t have thought that was her first time, you know what I mean? She was so good and her body is amazing. Her tits-oh man her tits-” He is interrupted by Monty, who had been giving you a sympathetic look since he noticed you standing there.

“Jasper. Behind you.” Jasper spins around greeted by an eyebrow raised and your arms crossed.

“We will discuss this later, for now, I would appreciate you not talking to the guys about my tits. No matter how amazing they may be.” You say the last part after pausing for a moment, it’s for dramatic effect. You leave all the boys dumbfounded and you hear them hollering at Jasper as you walk back to your workzone. Boys will be boys.

BitCH I K=DOTSNVEAJ i do not know what this is or if its good or bad but its long and im tired and my spring break is over and i have school tomorrow and i m SCREWED

#The 100 #the 100 fanfiction #the 100 prompt #the 100 smut #the 100 imagine #jasper jordan #devon bostick #jasper smut #jasper imagine #jasper jordan imagine #jasper jordan smut #smut #harper macintyre #monty green #harper imagine #monty imagine #jasper fanfiction #imtired

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justastormie · 7 years

Text

I’m doing two, because I can.

Ancient Historical meme from my drafts;

First things first: What’s their name and when and where did they live? If there are any/ you have one, add your favourite picture of them.

Erwin Johannes Eugene Rommel (1891-1944), Germany, lived around Württemberg for most of his life, the occasional world war aside. Of historical note for being a masterful tactician, writing an important book of military theory about wwi and commanding the german forces in the north african campaign of wwii.

Napoleon (1769-1821), France technically but had a great deal of fun on camping trips all over Europe. Of historical note for one-uping Alexander the Great. Created landmark legal, military and social organizations. List of fuckups is longer than most people’s list of accomplishments. One of the most enduring military and political legends of the modern era. Bees.

1. How and when did you first hear about them?

Rommel- I honestly can’t remember. My father is a wwii nut so i was raised on the stuff. I got serious in my interest of him about 12/13 when I first read the collection of his papers translated into English.

Napoleon- fourth grade (about ten years old). We had a section of world history, dismal though it was. In one of the little “fun facts” thing they had a tiny little box describing Nap’s return from Elba with an itty-bitty reproduction of Steben’s Returned From Elba. I thought that sounded like the most badass thing I had ever heard, and was also a little in disbelief because surely someone can’t just walk back and reclaim their kingdom. Like, that shit didn’t happen in real life. So I bought my first biography to find out the real story.

2. What do you like most about them?

Rommel

he tempered his ambition and leadership with compassion and a fierce sense of honor

genuinely seems to have been a nice dude

he and his wife are cute as fuck

was later cute as fuck about his son Manfred

was incredibly clever

was a peach eating lunatic adventurer masquerading as a srs prussian soldier

he was a romantic both in the age of chivalry sense and the modern sense

Napoleon

SUCH A BADASS, oh my god

was an over-invested mono-maniac at all times, which I can related to

incredibly capable in many fields

i have been napoleon and josephine trash since day one

crowning himself. i just love that moment.

was really smart. on a ‘holy shit’ level. (even if he did some massively stupid shit sometimes)

meritocratic promotion structures

hamilton WISHES he were this non-stop.

never gave up, never gave in. even on st. helena he started dedicated his energies to preserving his legend and legacy, to great effect.

3. Is there anything about them that makes you angry or that you don’t like at all?

Rommel

literally worked for nazis

pretty sexist

there’s a lot i disagree with him about, but very few things that make me truly pissed off. ie he was of the period opinion that military men shouldn’t be involved in politics, as he thought that would mean the military as an organization would start defining germany’s political future which would turn into military rule and he was catagorically against that. which i think is both wrong and allowed him, and others in the german army, to disclaim responsibility for political shit they didn’t agree with that was being done by their government. but i can absolutely see where he was coming from, and i think his concerns were reasonable and legitimate.

so yeah. a lot of disagreements, but very few things that just piss me off.

Napoleon

w h e r e d o I b e g i n

allowed his obsession with legend and conquest overwhelm his moral values

sold his honor and his moral principles in order to maintain power

frequently only took into account the human cost of warfare way too fucking late

rampant misogyny

really fucked over Junot

really fucked over tons and tons of people who were loyal to him, from close friends to the soldiers who followed him

got a truly staggering number of people killed on account of his own short-sighted obsessions

to paraphrase the old tv show Wiseguy, You don’t get to shove people around just because your fire burns brighter, no matter how brilliant that fire is.

never gave up, never gave in. even when he fucking should have, looking at you reasonable peace terms of 1813.

4. If you had one day with them in our present time - what would you do together?

Rommel - Aviation museum, he’d absolutely love it. I’d get him to pick some German place to eat and interrogate him ruthlessly about what inter-war rural Germany was like.

Napoleon- Smack him repeatedly in the face for invading Spain Walk and talk. Have him show me around Paris and have a debate over legal systems. Nerd out over Ossain. Show him a modern bookstore. Let him see how much of his work has survived into the present day. Shove him into at least one shrubbery.

5. What would you like to talk about with them?

Rommel - Engineering, aviation, dogs and funny army stories

Napoleon- All of the things. I can only imagine the conversation would be a pinball game of madness as to topics covered. And okay. I’d have to ask about Waterloo. I’d be that person. I don’t think he’d do it, but I’d love to hear him talk about Corsica.

6. In which way do you identify most with them or a figure they created?

Rommel - He was an intensely practical man who tried very hard to do the right thing and frequently failed. I hope that one day I’ll have the strength of character to try to rectify my mistakes as he did his.

Napoleon - I too am an over-invested, bossy weirdo.

7. Thoughts about their death? E.g.:Was it too early, was it deserved, woud you have tried to prevent it and how?

Rommel- oh god TOO EARLY, UNDESERVED, that poor brave bastard. I mean the fact that he was murdered because of his role in a plot to overthrow hitler and make peace with the allies is reason enough. would have definitely tried to prevent it, but would need like. the a-team to stop it. because you’d have to rescue not only rommel but his family that was being used as leverage against him. unless you’re allowed to go really far back and then i’d just start slapping the shit out of everyone at the versailles peace conference.

Napoleon - hoooo boy. uuuuuuuh. i mean. do i like it how he died? no. does that dislike come from a rational place? ...nooo. best case scenario for me would be he gets shot before the last charge of waterloo. hell if i had my way i’d go back and convince him what REALLY needed done was him personally leading the imperial guard up the hill. heroic, dramatic death and historians get to fight over wellsley actually beat napoleon for the rest of forever. europe also gets a break from napoleonic insanity. which doesn’t happen if napoleon gets to live. once more if you’re allowed further back, i slap the shit out of him before he invades Spain and point out that Ireland is lovely this time of year (it’d still be a clusterfuck, but less of one).

8. Is there a book or movie etc. you would recommend to someone who’s new to the person and would like to learn more about them?

Rommel - The Rommel Papers is a good place to start, there are frequent letters to his wife but the content is primarily military.

Napoleon - Shannon Selin’s website and book. The book is fiction but she is the lord our god in this fandom for her mad research skills. She provides sources for everything, which makes her the perfect jumping off point. (Now if I can just convince her that what she REALLY needs to do is write another book starring josephine)

9. What can we learn from them?

Rommel - when in doubt, bluff like a motherfucker right action is not a mystical, obvious thing at all times, we must do what we believe is right to the best of our abilities while being willing to let compassion guide us onto different paths.

Napoleon -

human beings are capable of astonishing intellectual and physical feats, and the best of our stories can still be written, they are not confined to antiquity.

find friends who will support your goals and then listen to their good advice even when it challenges your ego.

if loud, bossy weirdos can find devoted friends and romantic partners than we’ve got a pretty good shot too.

don’t invade spain

propaganda is half the battle

love, in all its forms, is a resilient motherfucker

don’t interrupt your enemy when he’s making a mistake

strive to be so badass that hundreds of years later, the historical fiction that is all about fighting you has their characters become complete fanboys any time you actually show up (ft. Richard Sharpe in Down With The Tyrant But OMG Harper Look It’s Napoleon *SWOON*, hon. mention also goes to William “Why Aren’t I French” Laurence).

a willingness to take charge is half the battle for power

bees are a cute fashion accessory and go with anything

10. Would you want to be friends with them if they were still alive?

Rommel - I think he’d be a good Dad Friend to have. Someone to ask for advice and go to reenactments with. A good person for moral/personal advice even if their political/social views are outdated. Definite bonding over dogs.

Napoleon - Would entirely depend on how we met. I feel like we’re similar enough on a personal level that it’d be very easy for our personalities to clash, and we’d have to declare ourselves mortal enemies and neither of us would back down from that because what is admitting you might have been hasty. Or, if fate were kind, we’d get on splendidly with constant low levels of dry sarcasm and prank wars. There would also be lots of emotions everywhere, at all times. People would hide. I have to admit I’d still stab somebody if it meant I got to be a Marshal.

11. The most powerful quote by or about them?

Rommel - have short one and a long one

"We have a very daring and skillful opponent against us, and, may I say across the havoc of war, a great general."

- Winston Churchill during 1942. During the fucking war. I mean damn, it doesn’t get better. Though since this is easily the most famous quote about him, have a personal favorite;

“Living legends, they project, each in his way, the classic image of a the warrior: brave, vigorous, sharp of eye and mind, rapid in decision, alert in danger, faster and bolder in the fight than his enemies. of this extraordinary brotherhood is Rommel-the brotherhood of Hector, of Rupert of the Rhine, of those who can only be described as heroes; and it is curious that so determinedly practical a modernist as Rommel-the least fanciful of men- should have joined a company so bonded by myth.”

-David Fraser from Knight’s Cross: A Live of Field Marshal Erwin Rommel

Napoleon -

All animals are equal, but some are more equal than others

i mean;

History is a set of lies agreed upon.

- Napoleon at some point, i’m not sure. But i’ve always loved it and found it apt.

#stormie cares about dead people #and blathers on #i'm cleaning out my drafts

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woodworkingpastor · 6 years

Text

Creation and Fall Genesis 6:5-22; 8:13-22 September 9, 2018

Call to Worship

And when Jesus got into the boat, his disciples followed him. A windstorm arose on the sea, so great that the boat was being swamped by the waves; but he was asleep. And they went and woke him up, saying, “Lord, save us! We are perishing!” And he said to them, “Why are you afraid, you of little faith?” Then he got up and rebuked the winds and the sea; and there was a dead calm. They were amazed, saying, “What sort of man is this, that even the winds and the sea obey him?” (Matthew 8:24-27).

God of promise, we are occasionally beset by storms. Some of these come upon us suddenly and catch us unawares. Others of them are entirely of our own making and bring to us difficulties that we have earned.

Into our world of struggle and weakness, you set a bow in the sky to remind us that you will never again forsake your creation. Make us ever mindful of your promise, so that we might honor our covenant with you.

We pray these things in the name of Jesus Christ, our Savior and Lord. Amen.

December of 1914 was the 5th month of World War I. Fighting along the front lines had become a stalemate due to the ineffectiveness of early strategies, and with the approaching Christmas holidays an unexpected thing began to happen. A few brave soldiers left the trenches and approached those of the enemy to exchange Christmas greetings, tobacco, food, and souvenirs. The dead were gathered and returned behind the lines for burials, services that in some cases attended by soldiers from both armies. Prisoners were exchanged. Christmas carols were sung. There is even an unverified report of a football game being played.

In the midst of this, some commanding officers began to wonder if they would ever get their troops to resume fighting after the Christmas Truce of 1914.

It was an experience that was difficult to repeat as the war went on. The increasing brutality of the war combined with the increasing loss of life and the eventual use of poison gas made Christmas good will harder to find. But for at least one Christmas, “peace on earth” had a brief glimmer of hope before people retuned to killing.

I was raised to believe that people are basically good. We see this in the ways that people help one another out in times of great difficulty and in the ways neighbors become good friends. Stories like that of the Christmas Truce both confirm that belief and call it into question. It’s a nice thought, to be sure. People do regularly display great kindness. But the depravity of the human heart can not be so easily dismissed, either. As followers of Jesus, we cannot be blind to the presence of great evil in the world around us; we cannot allow ourselves to only see what we want to see. Whatever feelings we have about our Scripture for today, the story of Noah and the flood does deal with the question of evil.

If there was ever a story that people saw what they wanted to, it’s this one. Somehow (almost certainly because of the animals) generations of people have relegated this story to the Children’s department and to our infant’s nurseries, as if Noah and the Flood is no different from a trip to the zoo. But these badly misrepresent the story.

It may be that we would prefer to skip this story all together. The idea of God acting this way is generally troubling to us. But one of the values of accepting the Narrative Lectionary’s discipline is that it takes us places we’d avoid on our own. And when we take a closer look, the story makes three points about God, humans, and evil that might be different from what we expect:

Human sin ruins the earth before God intervenes.

The flood is a response of grief, not anger.

In the end, the presence of evil is unchanged, but God’s response to evil does change.

Human sin ruins the earth before God intervenes

One of the constant challenges we face in Biblical interpretation is allowing the text to say what it says, without imposing our own preconceptions upon it. The story of the Flood is as good a story as any to be disciplined with noticing what the Bible tells us as well as how the author chooses to tell the story. Many modern readers have trouble with a God who resorts to this sort of action to deal with human sin. But this isn’t the point that the author wants us to take away from this story.

Notice how this story begins: with the statement that “the wickedness of humankind was great in the earth, and that every inclination of the thoughts of their hearts was only evil continually” (Genesis 6:5). Six verses after this we are told “the earth was corrupt in God’s sight, and the earth was filled with violence” (Genesis 6:11). The Hebrew word “corrupt” focuses these details even more. The word refers to the spoiling and destruction of things in general. In the Old Testament, the word is used to describe all sorts of things from the corruption of morals to a broken leather belt. Something that was intended for one purpose is no longer able to serve that purpose; it has spoiled or been ruined.

This Hebrew word occurs four times in this section. Three times it is translated “corrupt” and refers to human behavior. The last reference is translated “destroy” and refers to God’s response. We tend to look at this story and say, “How could God act this way?” We are often bothered by the fact that God destroyed the earth, but from the perspective of the story, the earth has already been ruined because of human sin. The ways people acted toward one another and toward God was exactly opposite what God intended, and it had ruined creation.

It’s why the way I was raised with the idea that people are intrinsically good is in many ways a flawed idea. People are capable of so much that is good: great love, kindness, compassion, beauty, creativity, and invention, to name a few. But we are not able to escape the corruption that is right there in our hearts. One of the odd quirks of being human is that we have the ability to look at some persons and decide that they are of great value, while looking at others and deciding they are less than human.

Across time, place, and culture, people give in to the prejudice that is part of the corruption of this world and begin referring to our enemies as vermin, dogs, cockroaches—persons, mind you, created in the image of God. Once this begins happening it is a fairly short trip to dehumanizing the other in more serious ways of institutional discrimination, hate crimes, and genocide. Anything to “exterminate” our less than human enemies from among us.

In his book, Less than Human, author David Livingstone Smith describes this particular aspect of human nature with the term outgroup bias. He writes that we have a “tendency to favor members of one’s own community and discriminate against outsiders (otherwise known as the “us versus them” mentality). We are more industrious, conscientious, attractive, and so on, than they are. When things go badly for one of us it’s an injustice, but when the same thing happens to one of them it’s because they brought it on themselves.” (Less than Human, 49).

Harper Lee describes this perfectly in To Kill a Mockingbird. The whole town knows that Tom Robinson is innocent and that Bob and Mayella Ewell are liars. But the Ewell’s are white, and Tom Robinson is black. And that’s all the jury needed to know. For all the Atticus Finch’s in the world, there are also a lot of Bob Ewell’s.

God is grieved

Is anyone surprised by this? You shouldn’t be because, again, when we set our preconceptions aside and read the story carefully, it’s the point that is emphasized. The flood is just the working out of these details.

So what about the flood? One interesting characteristic about the flood story is that this version of the flood isn’t the only one that exist in ancient writings. Other religious traditions had their own flood stories, and these share common details: a worldwide flood, a hero or special person chosen to ride out the storm on behalf of human kind, creation starting over.

What is different in the Old Testament version of the Flood story is how God reacts. In one of the other flood stories of that era, the gods become annoyed with people because people are noisy and the gods can’t get enough sleep. So the gods send the flood to get rid of people.

But in the Old Testament, God is neither arbitrary nor capricious. God isn’t simply flying off the handle in a rage. The author depicts God as sad about how things turned out: Genesis 6:6-7: “And the LORD was sorry that he had made humankind on the earth, and it grieved him to his heart. So the LORD said, ‘I will blot out from the earth the human beings I have created—people together with animals and creeping things and birds of the air, for I am sorry that I have made them.’”

And if we’ve been reading carefully from the creation story in Genesis 1, we might notice that God doesn’t so much send a flood as God pulls back the restraints that had been holding the floodwaters back. God had created a world that existed in peace and harmony, but now it functions in chaos and disorder. The flood is God saying, “if you want a world of chaos and disorder, I’ll let you have that.” God undoes what was created on day two, where the chaotic waters of the unformed world had been restrained.

The evil in our hearts does not get addressed by the flood

The final detail to emphasize is an odd one, indeed: the evil in the world does not get addressed in this story. You might have hoped that this would fix things. The only thing that changes is God!

At the end of the story, Noah leaves the ark and makes an offering to God. God makes a promise to Noah: “I will never again curse the ground because of humankind, for the inclination of the human heart is evil from youth.” This is a fascinating statement, because the evil in the human heart that we see all around us is the exact reason God allowed the flood to happen.

God is the only one who changes in this story. God chooses to find a different approach to heal the world.

Again, we have to set aside some of our preconceptions. We tend to like answers that solve our problems in one step. We look around at the challenges we face, or the controversies that plague us, and we want desperately to hold up something—a passage of Scripture, or a news article, or something that better fits on a bumper sticker than in real life—so we can say, “See, here’s the answer. Just do this. It solves everything.

The thing is, the Flood story doesn’t really solve anything, because the Flood story doesn’t tell the whole story. One of the details of Genesis that we have to consider is who wrote it. There are only two options: It was either written by Moses after the people left Egypt, or it was written by a priest after the people had returned from exile in Babylon. But in a lot of ways, this is a distinction without a difference. Either way, the people who are reading the story had been overwhelmed by a different kind of flood: either slavery or exile, experiences where everything had been taken away from them. And if they thought they were to be destroyed for their sin, God say, “No way.” The prophet Isaiah put it: “To me this is like the days of Noah, when I swore that the waters of Noah would never again cover the earth. So now I have sworn not to be angry with you, never to rebuke you again. Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed, says the LORD, who has compassion on you.” (Isaiah 54:9-10).

So rather than sending another flood, God chooses to enter the story in a personal way by making covenants: with Noah, with Abraham, and ultimately through Jesus, who finally entered our story in the flesh, who, though he was in the form of God, did not regard equality with God as something to be exploited, but emptied himself, taking the form of a slave, being born in human likeness. And being found in human form, he humbled himself and became obedient to the point of death—even death on a cross.

We must take the corruption of the human heart seriously, by entering the story with God and loving a broken world. We have an opportunity to do that today by dedicating persons from our congregation who are committed both to the story of Scripture and to entering into other’s lives by teaching in our Sunday School program. I invite those persons to stand.

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akissontheneck · 7 years

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Since I basically don’t exist on here, I’m going to write a story based on the actual events of my life.

-The Concert

I’ve known my friend Nikki since high school. We became good friends around Junior year and even though we weren’t incredibly close, we always felt like good friends. We had a drama class together and the next semester we were both heartbroken at the same time and we kept tabs on each other through social media and texts and I’d always cared for her, but there was never any sexual tension between us. It was as though we had an understanding of our friendship and everything was simple.

My senior year she met who was quickly becoming my best friend and they almost instantly fell in love. It was great, we all hung out together in our evolving group of friends as we started graduating and moving on in life, and I saw the both of them almost every day. They were so happy together and as I became closer to one, I became closer to both.

I had felt for a very long time that I had loved her, but in a different kind of way than a lustful love. I loved her in a way you love your best friend or your sister, and she felt the same. I think that in my entire life, she was my very best friend, who I could always depend on and who I was always happy to see in a happy relationship. But don’t get me wrong, I was definitely attracted to her. She was beautiful, absolutely gorgeous. She had a smile to die for, dark brown hair with hazel eyes that had a touch of green. She was adorable and very sexy. I’m not going to pretend that I knew what size she was, but she was about 5'6" and she was curvy. Her boobs were nice and perky, but they weren’t gigantic - it’s hard to tell with a girl sometimes, their cleavage looks different based on what they’re wearing, but sometimes she’d wear a shirt that really showed them off and it was hard to keep from staring, out of respect for her and for my friend. I’ve always liked the word, “bodacious” to describe them. She had a slender waist with very nice legs and an ass to blow your mind- It was so round and nicely shaped. I always imagened to compare her to Dillion Harper. I could control my thoughts most days, we had a strong relationship and she had always been with my friend, and I was very respectful towards her. That’s always been my nature, and that nature comes with its own sexuality where you don’t ever hookup and you get the “nice guy” reputation (but honestly is that so bad? Aside from the crushing loneliness), but occasionally it was almost too much to handle. You should have seen her in her Halloween Catwoman costume. Skin tight black leather… If I were her boyfriend, I would have pulled that costume off her with my teeth and fucked the shit out of her.

A long, rocky story later, she was no longer with my friend and she had found a new boyfriend who she is still with together who. They are a good couple, she had matured and he’s the kind you marry for stability, and they go well together. Just at the beginning of that relationship and the end of the last, we had tickets to a concert we had bought long before.

We went to a concert at the end of a summer. Our favorite high school, fuck you, good-music-for-bad-times pop punk band, Blink-182! We didn’t want to pay for drinks, and we were young, so we drank like war veterans. We shared a fifth of Jack Daniels and Dr. Pepper out near the car before we entered the venue, an outside pavilion where joint smoking was going on like it was a Blink-182 concert. I had rolled a joint and she had rolled a joint which she snuck in in her bra (which I admittedly thought was pretty sexy). It was hot and she was wearing jeans cut-off shorts and a band tee which she cut off the sleeves to and cut the neck line to expose her cleavage. When I asked why she cut it she said so she could get some douche to buy us drinks, which was pretty smart actually. If I was a bombshell like her, I’d probably do the same. We were pretty tipsy, and we met a couple at the show who we asked to buy beer for us in exchange for sharing our boob-joints. (I was older than her, and it was a week before my 21st birthday and they still wouldn’t sell to me!). We had a fun time while the openers played. We hung out with the couple we met and met a lot of other people (someone she found was wearing the same shirt as her, cut in the exact same way, probably for the same effect. Except she had huge tits! It’s a smart plan honestly, I would have bought her a beer just to see her stick it between them… or better yet pour it over them… But I digress). She had told the couple we met a story about her boyfriend and the guy was surprised that I wasn’t her boyfriend. I was actually really flattered that he said that. He made comments like, “Are you going to breakup with that guy and date him?” which I also liked hearing. We kept dancing and singing and jumping and smoking and drinking the whole night and the couple behind us kept trying to set us up together and towards the end of the night, after another attempt, she turned to me and yelled over the music into my ear, “They keep telling me to kiss you.” My heart was about to leap out of my chest. I wanted nothing more than to grab her around the waist, dipped her and kissed her deeply like an old Noir film, but the better side of me was stronger and I said back, “I was happy for you before, and I’m happy for you now.” She said how happy she was to hear that, and she gave me a big hug. It was a very nice moment in itself, but there was a little bit of a sadness in it. As the concert winded to an end, we had to traverse the sea of drunk people trying to leave the place and I was still very very drunk so she led me through the crowd like she had most of the night by having me put my hands on her hips and following behind her. It was nice to touch her that way, and to know I could trust her less drunkeness to guide my more drunkenness through the sea of concert-goers. It felt very intimate, and plus as we walked up hill, her ass was directly in my face, it was hard not to dive in face-first. We got back to her van (technically her parents van) and sat in the ocean of people walking by and cars honking. It was obvious it would take a while to get out of there and we were towards the back near the woods, and she felt she was a little too drunk to drive and I was definitely too drunk to drive so we sat and listened to music and talked. We were coming off the high of the show and the high of the joints and sort of the high of being together. Sometime in our conversation we had started holding hands. We talked about her fears and feelings of leaving a long term, serious relationship to another which could likely be serious and long term, and I assured her she’d always be okay and that bad times have to come in order to make room for the good times. “Like tonight?” She said with the most adorable look in her eyes. “Yes, like tonight.” I smiled. “Tonight was probably the best night of my life.” “Mine too.” She smiled back. Our fingers danced with each other in our hands and slowly our heads came together and we rested our foreheads against the other. We sat quietly for a while, then I quietly planted a little smooch on her cheek. I worried I had gone too far until she returned one on mine. Then our lips locked, it was incredible. We began kissing so passionately, and I leaned over into her seat and kissed her, running my hands down her back. I pulled away from her lips and kissed her cheek to her neck and kissed up and down her neck up to her ear and I nibbled on her ear lobe. She let out a moan into my ear that was the sexiest thing I had ever heard in my life. I kissed back to her lips until she gently pushed me off. My mind was racing and I’m sure hers was too, but our connection in that moment was so strong. She climbed over onto my lap and we continued kissing. She had her hands running through my hair and I ran my hands up and down her back under her shirt and I squeezed her ass in my hands. I had waited so long to feel her ass in my hands and I couldn’t believe I had this goddess on my lap. We kissed each other as people walked in front of the van and someone yelled something out which snapped us out of it. She sat on my lap and we gazed at each other for a second until she climbed off of me and into the back, pulling me with her. I clumsily fell into the back and sort of on top of her and we laughed, then she held my face up and kissed me again. She sat in the seat in the middle row and I reclined it back, lying on top of her as we kissed. After a little while of kissing her lips, and kissing her cheek and kissing her neck and nibbling her ear and gently biting her lip, I kissed my way down her chest as I unclasped her bra (which is hard when you're pressing her against the seat) and kissed down to her belly button until I lifted her shirt with my mouth and pushed her bra up to let free her wonderful tits. I had been dying to see them in their perky glory, and they were glorious. They were a handful with cute tan lines and delicious little nipples. I cupped and squeezed them and played with her little nipples with my fingers as she smiled at me and bit her lip, letting out soft little moans. I slipped my hand behind her back and pulled her up to me so I could kiss her again. She bit my lip softly and I continued to fondle her tits in my hand. After I pulled away from the kiss, I grabbed them both in my hands and she pulled me around my neck, shoving her tits in my face. I pushed them together around my face and kissed them, sucking on her cute pink nipples, flicking them with my tongue and squeezing her tits in my hands. After a while of sucking on her heavenly boobs and her soft moans growing louder, I slowly kissed down her belly and swung her legs over my shoulders (which was a little hard to do in the tight space) I kissed down below her belly button and I shoved my face between her legs. I aggressively kissed her pussy, sucking and biting and breathing my hot breath on her pussy through her Jean shorts. She was soaking wet through her panties and her shorts. "You're so wet." I breathed out to her. "I'm wet for you." She moaned as I leaned up closer to kiss her. She grabbed my face and pulled towards hers as I rubbed her pussy with my hand. She moaned into my ear as I kissed her cheek, and I took it as the sign to keep going, so I (a little clumsily) unbuttoned her shorts and began to pull on them. She leaned back and pushed her legs straight up against the roof of her car so I could pull her shorts off her, uncovering her heart shaped ass. As I pulled the shorts up around her knees I could see the bottom of her pussy .

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