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anantaru · 6 months

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DAY 22 — MIRROR SEX

kinktober 2023. — masterlist | ao3

𖧡 — including — cyno, kaeya, childe

𖧡 — warnings — fem! reader, mirror sex, cowgirl, rough but especially in kaeya's part, praise kink, the tension goes bang bang, oral (male! receiving)

𖧡 — CYNO

with cyno's hands reassuringly placed on your hips, his gaze litters down to where your bodies connected as your own were focused to please please avert the massive mirror right against your moving frames— but the man sought after making you watch it play out as he draws his palms along the swell of your ass to grind you into him, his rasp voice rough with desire and appetite.

now, for the first time you can actually see more yourself, watch how it's happening right before your eyes, and you notice the film of perspiration apparent on your bodies and glossing you on another— the lustrous sweat trussed on his defined shoulders, his attractive face and his chest harbored the liquid in between the rills of his tensed abs.

in a wordless moan, you push yourself into his lips as it was becoming harder for you to breathe and stifle your pitchy tunes consisting of sobs and cries— and for some reason, it was embarrassing to watch yourself, even though you have tried to keep your eyes away from the mirror, it was simply too big and gigantic to lucidly ignore, which perhaps was cyno's devilish intention all along.

"archons, look at you," he points to the right with a quick toss of his head, a cruel smirk tugging at his soft lips, "you're, ah— so pretty," when he suddenly thrusts up into the wetness of your cunt as you barely turn your eyes towards your reflection, utterly filled up and trembling to the warmness of being entered by his throbbing length, and seeing it happen before your eyes only fueled the desire in you, made you press your aching walls down into the thickness of his shaft splitting you to the hilt, his cock balls deep inside and drawn against you as you greedily swallow him all up.

"i need you to see it," it really turned cyno on, he cannot conceal it any longer and your slight reluctance and embarrassment, how your face was boiling over with an ignited hotness across your cheeks, he needed you to see him fuck you rough and deep, aside from wanting to hear your noises and pleas as loud and clear as possible.

it was worth it, cyno believes, and his unforgiving pace on you never falters one time— he was aware of what you sought after, how you wanted his cock to rub over your bristling splotches before each snap of his hips burst into the tight bubble in your lower belly until you're reduced to nothing but a clouded facade, the hot air of his deep heaves fanning against your glistening lips as he whispered hazy words of praises and lust to you ever so graciously.

𖧡 — KAEYA

"fuck, baby… am going to fill you up, okay?" kaeya was synching the rhythm of his thrusts and skilled fingers eagerly rolling over your neglected clit as he watches you manifest a dazed and a bit shaken state of being— you must understand the cavalry captain, because, well, you're just so hot, plain and simple, and your legs would honestly collapse against the messed up linen if it wasn't for kaeya holding them up with his hips pressed into you.

for the most part, the feeling of your warm, wet pussy clenching down onto him was an obvious indicator that you were enjoying yourself, yet kaeya was aware that the wide-ranging mirror both on the left and right were aiding him perfectly, or how he noted that you were obviously avoiding to turn your head to either side— so, as one might expect, he did what he thought was the best-fitting decision and quickly curved on palm around your face before pushing you to the left, making you twitch and turn from a permanent oversensitivity dragging across your folds as he forces you to watch him fuck you into near oblivion.

"you're so fucking pretty, baby, look," he coos, before grinning when you reluctantly catch the lewd reflection of his amused face on the mirror as he picks up the tempo on his digits working wonders on you, rubbing your burning clit fiercely and pinching it ever so often, squeezing the buzzing flesh of nerves and combining his strong shoves so it's all rough and deep, but also with enough care involved around it.

"taking me so well, all of me.." he continues to coo sensually, your tight cunt clenching at his praising words and swallowing him entirely, so you're gushing your liquids on top of his shaft, his balls tightening and on the brink of burying his warm gift into you as you cry out from another snap forward, babbling something between a moan and a whimper, the glow of sex shadowing across your fucked out facial features and the most fun part— you could see it all happening in front of you.

𖧡 — CHILDE

"yeah, baby, yeah?" childe was always warm to touch, and you notice how he catches his breath ever so slightly as you first make contact with his cock springing free from the tight confines of his pants— and you idly trail your fingers over the thrumming veins right away, tenderness reaching his silky-soft skin, his soaked tip red and hot, the rigid veins twitching on his shaft.

"gonna keep your eyes on that mirror while you suck me off, right?"

you nod eagerly, and your mind, for now, was relatively smoothly until he pats his leaking tip against your tongue, tap tap tap— and there he was again, your handsome harbinger, right back to his pleasant praises turning you all flustered and shy.

before he can continue to speak his mind, childe desperately throws his head back as he groans loudly so that you're certain people must've heard him at least a little bit, or wonder what the hell was going on behind those particular closed doors.

his hips press into you deep and frenzied now, at first planting a couple experimental shoves inside your mouth until you taste the veins located on the underside of his cock twitch and tighten on your hot tongue, the taste of his pre slightly bitter and musky— but it's evidently burning a wet spot into your drenched panties, the maddening scent of his expensive cologne looming above your figure and the raw taste of him were both so arousing that you were already playing with the filthy thought of silently slipping one hand past your panties to pleasure yourself.

a thin film of sweat builds up above his forehead as his eyes light up when he watches you please him through the mirror— on your knees for him, obediently taking his cock and being so unbelievably enchanting as he stands proudly with his chest slightly bend forward, a haze lingering above your eyes as your hand shoots up to play with his balls, squishing the sensitive part of him all the while you're oftentimes peaking to the right to watch yourself and oh;

hold on a second!

how come big and fearless tartaglia sounded so helpless right now? oversensitive to his very core when your throat suddenly convulses around his large tip prodding at the hilt of you, his muscular thighs twitching and trembling as he notices how you're attempting to relax your jaw so you could swallow more, mainly so he'd be able to spill his hot load deep down your throat and soothe the burning spots scattered across the skin.

"you're stunning," he moans his admittance without an ounce of shame, his breathing growing ragged and pebbly as he places both hands against your head to move you back and forth himself, your hiccups around his girth sending a bolt straight down his spine.

"fuck baby… want to lie between your thighs and eat you out next," his voice manifests softer and his gaze searches for your figure in the mirror as he strokes his hand over you, making you look at him again— your parted lips spread to their limits around his thudding girth, a steady stream of liquids trickling down your chin as it fueled your thirst for him and childe, in his gleaming enjoyment, found no one to be as stunning as you, not now, not tomorrow, not ever.

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reiincarnatiion · 9 months

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shadows of destiny | azriel x reader | part two

summary : jealous but confused azriel, yearning shadows and sexy lucien and sexy reader ;)

🧚‍♀️

a/n: 💗 WOW. SO MUCH SUPPORT ON THE FIRST PART BROOO GUYS I JUST OFCOURSE HAD TO WRITE PART TWO and def will have part 3 i guess? ngl i am an angsty writer so im not good at writing happy endings HAHA rip for u all.

this is so addictive ive already written 3 stories in a span of like three days HAHAH 💗

also most azriel stories i read are never from his perspective so im keeping it from his perspective to change things up! he is def a bit out of character because i havent read acotar for a while rip but enjoy! thanks for the support and let me know your thoughts !! also this isnt proof read cuz ya girls lazy >.<

read [ part one ] !!

---💗---

"What are you two doing?"

Lucien and you both looked up, shocked (but not really) , to find Azriel standing in the middle of the dance floor, clad in his black silk shirt and pants, with swirls of tattoos peeking through, his collarbone on full display. Fae moved gracefully around him, dancing and making out, carefully avoiding the famed shadow singer.

He stands in front of you two, just as you two had begun your pathetic attempts to drunkedly dance. Your short dress had ridden up to the top of your thighs, pressed against Lucien's pants, and Azriel knew it was entirely inappropriate. He observed as you raised your eyebrows and looked down at him.

He couldn't fathom how you two had crossed the line from friends, but he knew it was wrong. Over the eons, he had seen you with many men, but they had always been strangers to him and the Inner Circle. They had never been serious.

Were you and Lucien serious? The club fell silent to him, as he awaited your answer.

His shadows swirled around his feet, urging him to intervene. Some even attempted to caress your legs, but Azriel swiftly reeled them in, refusing to acknowledge how soft and sweet-smelling they might be. He couldn't bear to know how apparently tempting they were.

Azriel clenched his jaw as you gazed back at him with your kohl-lined eyes, their newfound seductive power nearly breaking his stoic demeanor.

He bit the inside of his cheek to quell the sudden effect your look had on him, not wanting to indulge in such thoughts; they could only lead to trouble.

"Uhhh... Dancing?" you drawled back finally, rolling your eyes in a way that he would have only have liked to see in bed with you, behind you, with his hands wrapped in your hair as he-

He blinked, the deafening thumping of the music returning to his consciousness, as the rush from his panicking shadows ebbed away, calming his racing heart.

What was he doing? Why did he even come here? A wave of guilt washed over him as he tore his gaze away from your captivating eyes, only to hear you laugh and giggle as Lucien whispered something in your ear, drawing you closer. A giggle Azriel had never noticed was so adorable and sexy at the same time.

Azriel shook his head, trying to make sense of the overwhelming emotions within him. It didn't make any sense. You were like a little sister to him, an integral part of his family.

Stupidly, he realized that he didn't know why his shadows urged him towards you, nor did he understand the sudden waves of jealousy coursing through him.

"AZ! SO NICE OF YOU TO FINALLY JOIN!" a voice screeched, breaking the tension that had enveloped him and the couple in front of him.

They weren't a couple, but they looked like one, and he couldn't stand it. He didn't know why he was acting this way, but he knew one thing for sure: he didn't like it.

He didn't like how Lucien's slender fingers gripped your waist with such familiarity and intent.

The voice that had called out before now manifested next to him as Cassian stumbled over, dragging Nesta along. Their interlocked hands taunted him once more, but Azriel forced himself to look up at Cassian.

"BROTHER!! LET'S DANCE!!" Cassian howled, reaching them and clumsily starting to move their bodies to the rhythm, grabbing Azriel's shoulders to mimic their motions. Azriel stumbled back, desperate to escape the situation, but Cassian persisted.

"Leave me alone, Cassian," he mumbled, brushing his brother's hands away with his gloved ones.

"Why don't you ever dance with us?" Cassian whined, oblivious to Azriel's attempts to withdraw.

Azriel burned with annoyance, returning his attention to you and Lucien. But then, a tender voice spoke out behind him, and he knew it was Feyre even before turning around to see Rhys drunkenly laughing with Cassian as the other couple joined.

“Az, what are you doing, staring holes into Lucien and Y/N,"

"I--" Azriel faltered, trying to make sense of his emotions and jumbled thoughts. "It's just wrong."

He blinked, wondering why he had even gotten up in the first place.

"They're just drunkenly dancing; Elain is fine with it. You don't have to defend her honor here, Az," Feyre assured him, patting him on the back before returning to her mate.

Azriel stood still, smoothing out his pants and running a hand through his tousled hair. The club's hazy atmosphere seemed to envelop him, and he realized that the fae wine he had consumed tonight had hit him hard. Perhaps he had gone too far this time.

"Yes, yes, of course. I just thought Lucien should respect Elain..." he answered hastily, though he knew Feyre had already left. Shadows informed him that Rhys and Feyre had retreated to their more secluded spot again, and Azriel felt a pang of envy.

A couple of fae rammed into him, slightly spilling their drink and apologising in a haste as they realised who they had just knocked into. He glowered down at them and shook his head, stalking back silently back to the booth.

He walked back to the booth where Elain was still seated, nursing a pink drink.

"What was that all about, Az?" she asked innocently, though her doe eyes betrayed her knowing nature.

"It was nothing."

"You were clearly distraught, Az."

"My shadows sensed something was wrong, that's all, Elain."

"Lucien and Y/N?" Elain asked gently, her hand reaching for his gloved hands.

Azriel looked down at her delicate skin brushing against his black leather glove and he felt a sudden overwhelming contrast between the two. He removed his hand from hers, realizing how mismatched they were.

Cassian and Nesta complemented each other perfectly, a match made from the Cauldron itself. Feyre and Rhys shared a love and trust so profound, it was interwoven within their powers.

But what did he have with Elain, other than a forced interest in gardening and her white and pink flowers?

"They're just dancing, it's fine," he told her, his voice numb. He couldn't help but look back at you and Lucien, still writhing against each other on the dance floor in ways that supposedly platonic friends shouldn't.

Lucien's hands were still firmly on your waist as you both gyrated, laughing and singing along to the music. You'd blame it all on the alcohol the next day, if asked about your actions. Azriel knew that, just as he'd experienced countless nights where Cassian or Rhys had kissed him during similar inebriated moments.

Beside you two, Nesta and Cassian mirrored your movements, seemingly unfazed by the intimate nature of your dance. The club's flashing colors continued to shift and flash all around Azriel, in strikes of pink, blue and green but all he saw was red, and he did not

Know

Why.

---

read part three here dearies !!

taglist for shadows of destiny : @allyjoe755 @impossibelle @t0uch-starved-h0e @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @marina468 @cassan1306

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icanseethefuture333 · 4 months

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What blessings are coming for you in 2024?

collab with @sunkissedchld 💛

Please go check out her post here!

Pile 1:

Shufflemancy -

Half Full by JGrrey

Radioactive by Imagine Dragons

I by Jaden

Signs: 818, silver, wires, blue, green, white, ocean, the sun, blue daisies, braided hair or material, mandalas, wall tapestries, old keys, doors being locked, mirrors, rosaries, crosses, anointing oil, Poseidon, Percy Jackson, Yemaya, honey biscuits, & beignets

Service, Change, Mirror, Heart With A Key, The Sword & Rose, & Liberator

For 2024, pile 1, I see that there is going to be some big changes! "Out with the old, in with the new". In 2023, you could have paid a big service to others by helping them with their needs, which led to putting everyone else above your own personal goals. Helping others can be a good thing but it is alright to be "selfish" at times! I feel that you think if you do good by others you will attract good karma into your life or the universe will magically bless you for your good deeds, when that's not how it works. If you wish for change, you have to be the change you seek. For 2024, you should focus on your self concept and understanding how the 3D works. The 3D reality is your external world, it will reflect back to your most inner prominent thoughts. You have the key to manifest your best potential. Harness your skills and work on improving them. Be careful with your triggers as well. The universe will test you along your journey. So you may experience things that are an inconvenience or attract things you may not necessarily "want". For example, if you are manifesting wealth in 2024, but keep having issues with your finances. Instead of reacting to this and having thoughts or complaints that you're "broke". Release the fears that you have regarding abundance. If you are manifesting money but only receive a $20 dollar bill, be grateful for that $20 dollar bill, for someone else may not even have cash at all. Think of it as a small start to success. You have to liberate yourself from limiting beliefs and see the prosperity that surrounds you and that it is also given to you. If you are someone who sees things as "glass half empty", your perspective will change graciously and the blessings in 2024 will teach you how to see with a "glass half full". The new year will provide you with inner peace and clarity within yourself. You will also be divinely guided and protected during this time!

Pile 2:

Shufflemancy -

Glitter by Tyler The, Creator

Kolors by Monte Booker ft. Smino

Hey, Mickey! By Baby Tate ft. Saweetie

Signs: 222, Valentine's day, hearts, box of chocolates, kiss marks, pink, lavendar, red, lip stains on cups, baby cupid, Venus/Aphrodite, Persephone, Oshun, passion fruit, roses, makeup, bow & arrow, crown, metal, armor, knights, princesses, folklore, playing dolls, roleplay, fairytale romance storybooks, childhood nostalgia, 90/2000s movies, & Y2K

Love (2x 💕), Patience, Kisses, Cupid's Arrow, Soulmates, & Knight

Okayyyy!! This pile is stepping into their it girl/boy/enby era 💅🏽! This is too cute ✨️. You will be more popular than usual this year, pile 2. Your guides are wanting you to embrace this! You could be really shy and wish to avoid the spotlight, but you will be causing yourself a great disfavor by doing this! You are going to be so radiant, magnetizing, & beautiful this year and this is going to draw others to you. I am getting a vision of like those popular girls who walk down the hallway in a 2000s movie with their hair blowing in the wind and everyone else is just in complete awe of them. There could be significant changes to your hair, skin, and wardrobe, maybe even your physical features. Your hair could grow longer, healthier, and look shiny, while your skin would appear softer, dewy, and refreshed. I see that your guides will be blessing you financially to support this lifestyle and to overall enhance your beauty. "You have lived in the shadows of others for too long, you're meant to shine baby!" I feel that many people in your path have made you feel smaller than you actually are and your guides want you to know that you are meant to do something big in this lifetime. They wish to boost your confidence. In 2023, you were the underdog, but you are going to rise to the top in 2024. You will also have a lot of admirers this year! You will be weary of this and feel anxious, fearing that these people are trying to deceive you. There is no need to worry about this though, pile 2! Ease your thoughts and affirm that you are worthy of love, praise, and attention. Your inner beauty is going to be radiating through your physical vessel and this is going to be so intriguing to others. You could be attracting friends, lovers, & sexual partners. If you have been single for a while and waiting for the divine to bless you with a romantic suitor, then it is very likely that you will be in a relationship for 2024. There is someone here who is in love you and desires to be in a committed relationship with you. They will be very charming, romantic, and chivalrous towards you. I interpert this as self love as well! The love you have for yourself is going to transcend into the universe. It's like the Care Bear stare. The Care Bears were able to love others and reciprocate it as well. Allow yourself to give & receive this year!

Pile 3:

Shufflemancy -

Forever Young by BLACKPINK

Queendom by Red Velvet

Call Me Maybe by Carly Rae Jepswn

Signs: 333, giggling, laughing randomly or uncontrollably, people smiling at you, cameras, taking pictures, making videos, beaches, palm trees, upbeat music, nostalgic for music from your younger days, manic pixie character movie tropes, yellow, highlights, hair dye, bangs, high top sneakers, high waisted denim shorts, shuffling dance, longboards, swimsuits, pranks, Hermes, magic tricks, road trips, summer break, festivals, carnivals, & clowns

Self Esteem, Humor, Perservance, Girl Talk, Camera, Paradise, & Trickster

For some of you, the show "Dollface" or the movie "Joy Ride" could be significant. In 2024, you will be reuniting with some old friends of yours or making new ones. You could be getting over a break up from 2023 and the universe wishes to bless you with people who will stay in your life long term. This person you were with romantically or sexually could have left you feeling very depleted. As if they wasted your time and energy. You may have been feeling lonely or a bit lost, wishing you had people there for you to cheer you up. If you had friends that used to be close to you that you miss and have gotten out of touch with, it would be best to try contact them! You will never know unless you try :D! If you are someone who's never really had friends, then I see you coming across people soon. You will have to come out of your shell though and have the confidence to strike up a conversation with people. You will see that you are actually quite funny and a joy to be around! I'm getting a vision of like sleepovers and movie nights. This could have been your favorite to do when you were younger. I feel you should focus on creating new memories for yourself in 2024 and don't be afraid of doing those cheesy things you did as a teenager. Create photo books, make collages, talk on the phone all night long, go out ob trips on a whim, etc. There is so much more to life than just wanting to find your life long significant other. There's this joke that's I've been seeing on social media where it's like a young adult is either married or have kids and then people say "oh she 23? Shawty should be in the club" and it's true 😭! Don't waste your youth away worried about finding the one, just go have fun! It doesn't matter how old you are! Wear those heels and put yourself out there! You are going to regret it if you don't focus on your happiness in the future so make it happen. In 2024, your life will be spontaneous and adventurous!

Pile 4:

Shufflemancy -

American Girl by Bonnie McKee

Sweet by BROCKHAMPTON

SAD GIRLZ LUV MONEY (Remix) by Amaarae ft. Kali Uchís

Signs: 444, Seshat, Athena, money in hidden places or on the street, vivid dreams, orange, green, STEM student, university, class, fire, drug commercials, hospitals, blood drawings, shots, measurements, glass, gas, science, chemistry, ball & chain, monopoly, dice, game pieces, poker cards, & checkers

Happiness, Health, Addiction, Abundance, Passion, & Visionary

For some of you, it was possible you were suffering from a lot of issues with your health in 2023. You could have been more prone to getting sick and catching colds, the flu, etc. Your health will be doing much better in 2024! I also see if you are a STEM student, I see your grades improving or you will graduate this year! Congratulations! This message only applies to a select few, but in 2024 I see that you will successfully become sober and overcome any addictions you had! Regardless of which of these resonates with you - there is a big focus on achievements with your health. Whether that is your health or other people's health you are taking care of, things will be looking great ❤️‍🩹! I see that you are very passionate regarding your career as well and there could potentially be some opportunities coming your way in 2024. I feel that a lot of the people in this pile are studying or work in law, the medical field, or do something along the lines of STEM (science, technology, engineering, & mathematics). You are very studious, smart, and bright! I see that in 2024, you will not be taking no for an answer and will do whatever it takes to achieve your goals. Your determination will be admired by others and I see that you will pass many job interviews or receive a big internship soon. There is going to be an opportunity coming your way that will be blessing you financially. Pay attention to your intuition and how it will make you feel. If something makes you happy and feel good inside, it is meant for you. If you feel a bad vibe or something is not right, trust your gut instincts! Do not allow others to pressure, persuade, or force you into doing things you don't want to. I also believe this ties in with the addiciton factor, the people in your path could be codependent on you or they will try to push you into doing things that are not beneficial for your growth. You are not obligated to do anything these people say, focus on your best interest. Either cut these people off or stay away from them, pile 4! It is very important that when you go into the new year that you stay away from any substances that are harmful to your health. Regardless, you will be very happy, healthy, and wealthy in the upcoming year 🏆!

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linnienin · 1 year

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💄A S T E R O I D ⁕ S I R E N E ⁕(1009)💄 through the signs and degrees

Disclaimer: Take what resonates. I'm not a professional astrologer, i just am an avid researcher and i use my personal experience when writing my posts (Also, pls, don't copy my work, i spend lot of time on it, thanks)

Hello beautiful souls!

I'm back with another post on a very requested asteroid 💜

A lot of you asked me about Asteroid Sirene and how it manifests in a birth chart, and initially i answered singularly, but the requests started to get out of hand a bit for me, so i decided to create a whole post on this asteroid in different signs/aspecting different planets

I have planned other posts on this asteroid but for now I..

Hope you enjoy it!

W H A T ⁕ I S ⁕ A ⁕ S I R E N ?

⁕ In Greek mythology, sirens are humanlike beings with alluring voices

Initially descripted as half human half birds then as "sea-girls with the body of a maiden, but have scaly fishes' tails"

⁕ Etymology of the name meaning: "binder, entangler" i.e. one who binds or entangles through magic song.

This could be connected to the famous scene of Odysseus being bound to the mast of his ship, in order to resist the sirens' song.

M Y ⁕ I N T E R P R E T A T I O N :

I want to make clear that this is just my view and thoughts on this asteroid and if you know a trusted source on its meaning please link it down below, i'd be very grateful 🙏

To me Asteroid Sirene (1009) has a similar energy to Lilith but it isn't as raw and destructive, it's indeed more controlled and patient. Lilith is warm blooded while Siren is cold blooded. In our birth charts it can shows where we can become manipulative, turn to our dark side and take what we want with strategy, seduction and mischeviousness.

It can also describe our seductive aura, or how we attract and magnetize others with charm (this can be both conscious or subconscious, depending on how in tune you are with yourself, and also can depend on which sign or house you have this asteroid in)

So, are you interested in knowing how you emanate this irresistible appeal?

Keep reading 💄

S I R E N E ⁕ T H R O U G H ⁕ T H E ⁕ S I G N S :

⁕ Aries/aspecting Mars/1°,13°,25°: Bold, assertive and fearless. Doesn't matter if the rest of their chart has quiet,cutie poofie placements, when asteroid Sirene gets activated these natives becomes confident queens/kings and knows how to defend themselves. They don't lose time to get what they want, they get straight to the point and they know they didn't come to play but to win. Their seductive charm lays in how confidently they carry themselves, people see these natives as natural leaders and warriors. They carry a powerful and intense aura you just can't ignore, the types that dare to do or say things that should't be done or said (but coming from them they sounds so cool gosh). Their facial espressions are intense and animated, and draws people in.

⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕

⁕ Taurus/aspecting Venus/2°,14°,26°: The walking sleeping beauty (lmao is she sleepwalking?). Jokes aside, here you can see how unaware these people are of their allure, and this is part of their charm too. They have such a calming and indifferent aura that makes everyone comfortable around them, and people get obsessed by this feeling of peace these natives exude that they can't have enough of. Usually they are the silent type of "Sirene", it's kind of a dormant feature in them. They are very sensual in their mannerism, and if they get to the point of being aware of how powerful they are well, it's the end of the game. They can seduce EVERYONE with their touch. The Queen Mida (oh yeah and they want that gold) 👀

⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕

⁕ Gemini/aspecting Mercury/3°,15°,27°: Everyone's fling. Such a flirty aura. They're very smart and intellectual, and everyone find them extremely interesting, so they automatically are drawn in because they want to know more (and some people will desperately show off to get their attention, it's insane). They can get quite some hidden envy from others because of how witty they can be. These people have a way with words, when they speak everyone else shut down to listen to them. I find having Sirene asteroid in Gemini is very similar to being a Siren/Mermaid how it's described in mythology, they are very cunning when they want to, know how to play games with other's minds, they are very good at putting masks on and turn the cards in their favours. (Also, the ability of sirens to change their body features reminds me a lot of Loki in Northern Mythology which happens to be associated with Mercury) They're the true puppet master and they know it. They have light and quick movements. One minute they're near you, the next one they disappeared from your view, and this is extremely fascinating to people. It's like they can't catch them even if they try so hard.

⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕

⁕ Cancer/aspecting Moon/4°,16°,28°: I think of these natives as the spy who pretend to play the damsel in distress, portrayed in old hollywood movies. Don't be fooled by their cute acting. They're actually quite good manipulators. People love how inviting they feel, so warm and nurturing, they have a healing aura to them. These natives makes other people feel like they need to protect them from the dangers of others. I think Sirene in Cancer can be naive at first, especially when inexperienced, but when they get their heart broken oh boy. If Gemini was the master at mind manipulation, Cancer is the master at emotional manipulation. Overall these natives can be pretty unaware of their behaviour, sometimes getting overwhelmed by their emotions, but they can also be one of the most destructive people ever when activating the Sirene energy(both to others and themselves) if they aren't in control of it.

⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕

⁕ Leo/aspecting Sun/5°,17°,29°: OOOOH those hip swings, you can recognize them instantly from just their catwalk, it's simply hypnotizing. These people take pride in their sensuality, and they know how to use it very well. You can't escape their attention if they have claimed you to be their prey. Another go getter like Aries, but not so in your face, because even if their focus is on what they want, they'd rather give ALL the signals until what they want comes to them. Very much like: i believe, i attract. Their charm is in the way they carry themselves, so wild and raw, a power of nature, these natives hair can play a huge part when when presenting themselves to the world. One of their game tecniques is the push-pull. They enjoy a good chasing, and it's also a way for them to test you if you're worthy of their time (yeah, they have big egos, so beware of that)

⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕

⁕ Virgo/aspecting Mercury/6°,18°: The unattainable one. Like seriously, people get obsessed over conquering the heart of this person just because of their nitpickiness and because they are unavailable 24/7. Others can get obsessed over fantasizing on these natives and creating stereotipes when they didn't even shared a conversation in the first place like...this is some powerful stuff. They naturally look so put together, when they wear basics it looks hot on them. Their seduction way is showing how skilled and talented they are, they can literally do anything when they activate the Sirene energy, they get obsessed over a thing and practice until they have mastered it (coff coff, hello... low self esteem and need of appreciation from others 👀). However, once they get some potential suitors they lowkey refuse them like they don't need them anymore, lmao, this is what drives them craaaaazy, "you did all that stuff for mee and now you're walking away? " 👁👄👁 Lemme get some morreee.

⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕

⁕ Libra/aspecting Venus/7°,19°: The too good to be true one. They put sooo much thought and intention and effort to present themselves that everyone can't help but look at them all the time. On top of this magnificent presentation add also a flirtatious and extroverted personality that pleases literally everyone around them and BOOM, you can't excape the trap of falling for them. They have a gracious and light aura, great posture and poise, literally princesses/princes. They truly feel like royalty, they also have this natural rich people vibe if you know what i mean. The best at getting what they want in social settings, can have a very innocent vibe that people love. People pleasing is their tecnique to get what they're after. They are one of the most seductive signs in this asteroid, but they're kinda unaware of it. I mean, sure, they know they're pretty but they don't know how many hearts they rob. Even strangers gets captivated by their charming presence, most likely to have suitors telling them "it was love at first sight".

⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕

⁕ Scorpio/aspecting Pluto/8°,20°: Heavy aura, attracts anything without even trying. They know how to make an entrance (Leos too, but Scorpios are much more subtle, and still, they get so much attention). People automatically throws themselves at these natives, all it takes is a glance and a little smirk and they living magnets. These people holds the throphy for being the MOST seductive of all the Sirene asteroid's signs . There's just something so intoxicating about them, you can't not get obsessed with them. They are the ones that has to be particularly careful of their aura because they are in this energy all the time and they attract a lot of stalkers, obsessive people, so these are (and should be) the natives that should have firm and clear boundaries. They'll find themselves stepping down at times just to calm this powerful magnetizing field around them, especially if they don't like the spotlight, but if the rest of the chart has placements that like to be the center of attention, this is surely a bombshell placement (watch out for the immense envy/jealousy from others)

⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕

⁕ Sagittarius/aspecting Jupiter/9°,21°: Their spontaneity is contagious. They're hot and cool, and know how to talk to people. Give them a night and they will befriend literally everyone at the party, and will reap so many opportunities out of nowhere. A favourite of the masses. Sometimes they can be a little loud and can get envy/jealousy from others, probably because of a rigid opinion they have, but they surely know how to play with it, telling jokes and conquering again the trust of those that didn't like them. They have such a careless and free spirit that they literally live day by day, without worrying much about the future, and people find this extremey hot. This placement is one of the most underrated one in terms of seduction, honestly when researching for this asteroid i found many siren-like women in our history that had/have Sirene in this sign, and i think it makes sense thinking about it, because Sirens are in their natural habitat out in the wild, so there's a sense of familiarity between the native and the raw energy of Sirens.

⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕

⁕ Capricorn/aspecting Saturn/10°,22°: The strategic and cold diva. People cannot enter their inner world and their vulnerabilities and this drives them mad and obsessed over knowing what's behind the mask. Can embrace their seductive charm later in life (probably from their 30s on). I have noticed these natives can have strong facial features that are difficult to forget. Attracts wealthy suitors, or will use their seduction to attract opportunity to get into power positions. They have an authoritative and mature aura, slow but decisive movements, can be intimidating to others, big D energy. Demanding of others and themselves. Calculating every move they make, good at getting the favour of those in charge. Could find themselves attracted to older/more mature people or they could attract them a lot. Intense, can be similar to Scorpio Sirene, but people are much more wary when approaching them (this is why usually older people are attracted to these natives, because they give off the vibe of knowing what they want)

⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕

⁕ Aquarius/aspecting Uranus/11°,23°: The one that to seduce just have to be authentic and nonchalant. Weird in a cool way, they catch people's attentions without even knowing, but just doing their thing. Their independence and uniqueness are their strong seduction charms. They're pretty unaware of their appeal because they don't even care about seduction in the first place, they have other things that go onto their mind. Their authenticity and disinterest may not attract many suitors, but the ones that get attracted by them are genuine and shares similarities to them, so they might find even THE ONE with this non-method-method. If they're interested in seducing, they might use very peculiar and unconventional ways to do so.

⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕

⁕ Pisces/aspecting Neptune/12°,24°: The innocent mysterious person everyone is secretly obsessed with. People will find themselves having wild fantasies on this person and not even knowing why. The way they walk and talk is smooth and divine, like they have a light surrounding themselves. Their eyes always seem to wonder around, like they're never in the present moment, and this fascinates people a lot. If they make eye contact when talking to you or listening to you, they will hypotize you 100%, even if they're not really listening or are having other thoughts. There's just something so enchanting and special about their eyes, also, often these people will have unique eyes or stunning shapes/colours (ex. Liz Taylor has Sirene in Pisces and she is known for having one of the rarest world's eye colour, purple). The least aware of their Sirene charm of all the signs.

M o r e ⁕ o b s e r v a t i o n s:

Water sirene: innocent and wandering eyes

smooth and relaxing voices

Fire sirene: fierce and sexy eyes

clear and powerful voices

Air sirene: playful and flirty eyes

high pitched, unique and chameleon voices (good at changing their tone depending on the situation)

Earth sirene: sweet and calm eyes

deep and warm voices

And you've reached the end of this post! 💄

I hope you enjoyed it, i kinda wanted to include the houses too, but i think it'd been way too long to digest, so stay tuned for another post on Sirene in the houses

Edit: I published Sirene in the houses too! Click below to read the post (i also included Celebs examples)✨

I wish you all a wonderful day ahead! ✨

Yours,

Linnie

#astro observations #astro notes #asteroid sirene #sirene asteroid #asteroid sirene through the signs

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anonabelle · 2 years

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Red Angel's got a new partner to Prevent Harm with.

I’ve been working on this thing since the start of September and I am SO GLAD it is finally finished! I want to see this team up on screen SO BAD. SENDING ALL MY WISHES TO THE WIND.

(Art process timeline thing under the cut!)

At some point I want to make a gif out of all the process pics I took because there are quite a lot. Below is the condensed version, with all the major steps. The render stage took the most time to do because I really wanted to capture certain aspects of the show’s art direction that I really liked (and it took a lot of experimenting because coloring isn’t usually my favorite step).

concept > sketch > lineart > flats > render (bigger image here)

This thing started off as a mindless procreate sketch (far left) and the thought: “Raph would be so much bigger than Casey in this iteration, huh. That’s cute.”

And yeah, snowballed from there.

I think I’ve drawn Raph several times since, but this is probably the first time I’ve ever tried Cass. I love her. I should (and will) draw her more.

Screenshots I spent a lot of time staring at, especially Raph down there as I was trying to get the “manifesting mystic gauntlets” look right (accidentally lost a bunch of progress on it the other day. it was pain but i powered through :’) ).

I believe the backgrounds are from Hot Soup: The Game, which I had playing in the background at around the time I decided to think about the background for this illo. The Cass screenshot is from Rise, of course, and Raph is from the movie, juuust before he attempts to punch a krang in the face.

If you’ve read this far, thanks for reading and I hope it was... informative? Interesting? Here are my Rise-Raph-and-Casey feelings all wrapped up in a piece of art that I put my soul into. Thanks Rise crew, your work continues to inspire.

#risetober #rottmnt #rise raph #rise casey #cassandra jones #casey jones #rise of the tmnt #raphael #red angel of preventing harm #tmnt #fanart #art process #to all the fanfic writers who have written about these two #i see you and i appreciate you

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lizaluvsthis · 2 months

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HAPPY VALENTINES DAY @merp0515 ! HERES THE GAYS WITH YOUR OUTFIT DESIGNS!

Ye got the sunset version!

SMG4 funds something new to try it out together with SMG3 on their first date, SMG4 holds Three's hand as he looks down taking notice.

SMG3 carries SMG4 after tripping down to the ground as Three roleplayed as his knight shining armor (saviour)

SMG3 gave a poem speech for SMG4's ears to only hear, they both shared an intimate moment of their time.

SMG3 is crying, he's happy to have SMG4 as his boyfriend. While SMG4 is sleeping, he enjoyed his moment laying on the bed with four.

SMG3 gave Four a bunch of kisses <3

(A bit more of em actually-)

AND THOSE ARE ALL OF THE ARTS TO PRESENT FOR TODAY'S VALENTINES DAY! HOPE EVERYONE ENJOYED THEIR MEAL BECAUSE I AM MANIFESTING FOR A SMG34 RELATED VALENTINES DAY EPISODE- AND IF THAT DOESN'T HAPPEN? THEN YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS...

(ICONIC DUO TO THE RESCUE)

[I REALLY REALLY LOVE THE OUTFITS AND I CANT STOP PUTTING IT THERE <3<3 thank you for pulling out the designs- they're both so fun to draw, merp!]

#lizaluv #smg4 #smg34 #smg3 #smg4 smg3 #my art #merp0515 #valentines day #happy valentine's day #smg43

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hausofneptune · 4 months

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aspects/placements i love (and hate!) in my chart pt. 1

[astro notes no. 003]

hey y’all! i felt like going through some of my personal aspects/placements and describing the “positive” and “negative” ways they’ve manifested in my life, so here we are. this ended up being longer than i thought it would, so i'll end up doing a part two since i really enjoyed making this!

disclaimers | masterlist | ask

venus conj. neptune in aquarius (1°03’) in the 1H

this is one of my favorite placements. i feel like this + my pisces sun can make me appear to others as “ethereal” at times, but if i’m keeping it a buck, it also makes me extremely evasive. i have a good amount of aquarius influence in my chart as well, so all of this combined definitely makes me feel like i have to put in effort to not come off as too impersonal, especially towards my loved ones.

having neptune in my 1H also makes me feel like people perceive me to be someone that i’m not. like even my close friends and family, i don’t feel like anyone actually understands who i am, and i don’t think i’ve ever had a relationship (platonic, romantic, or familial) where i felt like i was seen for who i actually am, or where i was able to connect to somebody on a deeper, spiritual level. i can also over-romanticize people and situations at times, but i’ve grown out of this habit… for the most part.

i’ve always been an extremely creative/artistic person. i’ve been drawing, painting, writing, and singing since i was a kid, and i even sell my artwork now as an adult. i’m extremely imaginative, but i do have to be careful to not get too in my head and forget to participate in reality, if that makes sense. i’ve also had issues with dissociation and memory loss throughout my life. i feel like my lived experience has more to do with that, but i can see how the Neptunian influence in my chart could play a role in it as well.

venus opposite north node in the 7H (1°40’)

there are some placements that convince me that the universe was tryna be funny when it made my birth chart. this is one of them. i have so many things in my chart that can make it challenging at times to form meaningful, trustful relationships with other people, and it’s interesting to me the fact that my spiritual growth is something that’s supposed to be found… through my relationships with other people. i try not to victimize myself too much and look at things from an objective lens, but i would be lying if i said it didn’t feel like people find it convenient to have me in their lives only when i allow them to view me in a way that makes them feel the most comfortable.

like i mentioned, i can be very avoidant, it’s something i’m working on. but i know that it’s possible for me to have fulfilling connections with other people, and obviously with this placement it’s something i need to work through my aversion to, seeing as my self-development and spiritual growth is something that’s extremely important to me and deep down i do want to want to experience having meaningful, healthy relationships.

sun sextile lilith (within 3.0°) in the 11H / chiron in the 11H

let me tell you, most of the people i’ve been friends with over the years, regardless of gender, hypersexualize the fuck out of me. especially the men i’ve been friends with, majority of them had feelings for me that i never reciprocated. i was actually friends with a girl in high school who’s moon fell in my 8H, and in hindsight she had a very unhinged, borderline obsession with me. she would speak to me, and get mad at me, as if we were in a relationship together, and did not understand any type of boundaries that you’re supposed to have with someone you’re friends with. i don’t hold it against her now as an adult, but we definitely don’t speak to each other anymore.

i’ve also encountered issues in regards to the relationships i've with women, mainly when i was younger though, the women i’m acquainted with now i have healthy, normal friendships with (thank god). but i’ve had friendships with girls where they secretly didn’t like me, they were secretly attracted to me, or both. and i don't mean this in a weird, misogynistic, "pick me i'm different!" type of way at all, this is just a pattern i picked up on with some of the women i've met throughout my life.

in regards to having chiron in my 11H, my sore spot is most definitely my friendships. on top of feeling misunderstood and objectified in the friendships i’ve had, i’ve also experienced trauma at the hands of people i thought were my friends. and i always do my best to exercise being mindful and self-aware, and i’m definitely not on some “i’ve always been the perfect friend and people hurt me regardless, boo-hoo, woe-is-me” type shit, because i’ve definitely hurt people in my lifetime. but in terms of how these placements have manifested, i’ve always encountered difficulty in connecting to others, and i’m just now getting to a point where i feel comfortable enough to even attempt to try making new friends again.

and this is what i mean when i say: astrology is a tool that you can use for shit that is more important than your appearance and future partner! it wasn’t until my 12H profection year when i started studying traditional astrology and learned how to read charts, that i actually began to understand myself on a deeper level and gained the confidence to end friendships that no longer served me and made new ones that actually do.

chiron in my 11H also makes me feel inclined to take on a “therapist” role in my friendships, something that can be good or bad depending on whether the boundaries are there or not. i tend to attract people who like to trauma dump on me (that’s my moon in the 8H influence too), and i have to actively put boundaries in place and make sure people around me understand that i have to be in the right mindset to hold space for them. there aren’t a lot of pisces sun stereotypes that i can relate to, but being an emotional sponge is definitely one that i can. unfortunately.

moon and ceres in virgo in the 8H

LMAOOO this one might be a little heavy. i apologize in advance. feel free to skip this one if you don’t want to hear about parental/maternal loss or my mommy issues <3

my relationship with my mom is without a doubt where a lot of my emotional avoidance comes from. that plus my moon being in the 8H makes me very guarded when it comes to emotional vulnerability, even with the people i’m closest to. without telling a bunch of strangers on the internet too much of my business, here are the sparknotes:

my home life growing up (and to this day lowkey) never felt stable

it never felt like i could feel my emotions without them “consuming” me, this was mainly an issue in my youth, i was around 12-years-old when i started going to therapy and taking antidepressants

my mom battled a chronic disease her entire life and passed away when i was a teenager

i’ve always craved to have deep, spiritual connections with people, and ever since i was a kid i’ve been extremely intuitive and had the ability to read a room and everyone in it without anyone having to speak, but i typically attract people who are either emotionally unavailable, or emotionally unstable in some way, probably because i come off as “closed off” on the surface.

in terms of my relationship with my mom, i love her but i could never be vulnerable with her about a damn thing, like i never really felt “heard” by her. she was a taurus sun, scorpio moon, with an aries stellium, as soon as she had her mind made up about something it didn’t really matter how i felt (pluto also falls in my 10H, and i definitely viewed her as an “authority figure” more than a mother at times). y’all remember this scene from lady bird where her mom tells her she wants her to “be the best version of herself she can be” and she asks “what if this is the best version?” - it was very much so that.

and i don’t want to give the impression that my mom didn’t love me because she definitely did. i think it was just a matter of what a lot of us eventually come to understand about our parents; that they’re products of the environments and the people they were raised by. and in my mom’s case, she did her best with the cards she was dealt and showed up the best way she could. it doesn’t make my feelings any less important, but it helps to maintain the balance between recognizing her humanity, and also validating my own frustration and trauma regarding our relationship.

venus conjunct ascendant in aquarius (2°40’)

i didn't wanna end this post on a depressing ass note so i'm adding this last aspect lmfao. honestly i struggle with some of the venusian energy in my chart because i honestly never really felt "pretty" growing up. it might be neptune in my 1H that effects my self image, because it wasn't until my 20s that i actually started to genuinely recognize my beauty. i feel like growing up i only viewed my beauty through the lens of the "male gaze" (it didn't help that i felt objectified from the boys around me), or through the lens of euro-centric/white beauty standards, and in adulthood i'm finally approaching the way that i view myself from my perspective.

i do notice that i attract people very easily, both in a friendly and romantic way. i know this aspect has to do a lot with love and romance, but honestly, i'm not too concerned about being in a relationship at this point in my life (with the way the economy is set up i think we all got bigger fish to fry rn but that's neither here nor there-), but like i mentioned i've always been an artist at heart and the art that i create plays a really big role in my identity. i've always found it easier to express myself through my paintings or my writing rather than my words.

aesthetics and comfortability are pretty big for me too, more so now in my 20s. this aspect has a lot to do with sociability and being inclined to uplift and help others, and i can relate to the latter but when it comes to other aspects in my chart i do struggle with being "outgoing" and coming across friendly, but we'll get to that in part two.

as always, if y'all have any of the aspects/placements mentioned in this post let me know how they manifest in your life and personality, and if you have any insight or questions in general feel free to reach out!

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whenmemorydies · 17 days

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Preliminary thoughts on The Bear, race, power and privilege

I’m a non-Black woman of colour who has spent all of my life in the west…so I’ve consumed a lot of television media that is produced by and for the white gaze. The most obvious way that gaze plays out is when people of colour are non-existent in a cast, or when they are included, are tokenistic, bit players.

A more insidious manifestation is where POC are cast to play parts that could just as easily be played by white folks: characters that have no interiority or external relationships related to their cultural identities, wider communities or individual or collective histories (for example, Mindy in The Mindy Project for most of its run, or the characters of colour in Season 1 of Bridgerton).

I've had some thoughts about how The Bear (thankfully) avoids tokenistic and "colour-blind" representation. I also have some thoughts about how the show models meaningful allyship. I'm so keen to discuss this with folks and hear what others think about it too.

Unambiguous and unapologetic

The Bear is confined in its universe, particularly in season 1 where it’s focus is tightly bound to the physical location of The Beef as the setting for almost every scene. Episodes of The Bear are generally not very long, so time is precious (every second really does count). These factors necessarily limit how deep we can get into each character. But the show is so good at drawing on different means of communication: images, lighting, score, soundtrack, phrasing, callbacks to previous episodes, other cultural references etc, that each episode is like a jewellery box with gems waiting to be unpacked and pored over. I've said that I have started reading this show like a tarot deck because of how rich the symbolism in each episode is.

So despite the constraints of time and setting, characters of colour in this show are also so very rich in their realisation and portrayal. These characters are unambiguously and - this is important - unapologetically racialised: through language (see: Tina’s use - and occasional weaponisation lmao - of Spanish), physical appearance (see: Sydney’s two-tone braids and her stunning, prolific collection of headscarves throughout the show), culturally distinct names (see: Sydney Adamu, Ebraheim, Tina Marrero, etc), food (see: Carmy’s peace offering to Syd in ep 1x03 of Ebra’s family chicken suqaar - a popular dish in the latter character’s birth country of Somalia), etc.

GIF by @chefkids

These may seem like small and inconsequential details to some. In fact I’ve been seeing a lot of commentary from folks online saying that what they like about The Bear is that race isn’t mentioned at all on the show. But make no mistake: race is all over this thing. The examples I've given are only some of the many references to racialised histories and cultures that build out the broader fabric of multicultural Chicago here.

What is not present in The Bear is a script that is wasting time explaining the characters of colour and their rich inner and outer lives to white folks. Those things are just a given and we are invited to witness them being brought to vivid life by this cast and crew. And I am fucking here for it.

Respect and allyship

Another thing I LOVE about this show is the respect given to, and the recognition of, the experience, talent, drive and ambition of its characters of colour.

This is most obvious in the relationship between Syd and Carmy who are signalled as complementary equals in many ways. Others have written on the importance of the representation embodied by Sydney’s character and you should search out that analyses, especially when its authored by Black women. The only other thing I’d say about it is that I love Sydney’s character and I also love endgame Sydcarmy (even if it’s only hinted at in the last second of the last frame of the last ever episode lmao…I will take whatever I can get of these two 😭).

I also see the show’s respect and recognition manifest in The Bear's investment in its staff, particularly in season 2. Everyone who worked at The Beef has a role at The Bear and Carmy, Syd and Nat fund the ongoing training and upskilling of their largely racialised staff to make sure this happens. Ebra and Tina are paid to attend culinary school (Carmy also gives Tina his prized knife for her studies and beyond). Marcus is sent to stage in Copenhagen to develop his skills as a patissier. And then we have The Bear itself - what started as Carmy and Michael’s vision, is now the whole team’s baby, with Sydney literally being made the captain of the ship by Carmy at the end of ep 2x09.

GIF by @savagegood

Part of what was so tragic about Carmy's fridge spiral at the end of season 2 was that he didn't get to see how beautifully the team came through in a crisis. Instead we had him internalising, regressing and lamenting how he had let everyone down. This language centred Carmy as the be all and end all of The Bear (saviour vibes) when this couldn't have been further from the truth (particularly in a season where the man spent so much of his time not in the restaurant but chasing manic pixie no-last-name-having Claire....but I digress).

Carmy is his best when he checks his ego, takes a step back and realises that he is not alone. He is part of a whole chosen family supporting one another at The Bear. And I get the sense that the folks creating this show know that we need more white folks using their power and privilege to step back and facilitate access, and less gatekeeping white saviours taking credit where its not due.

After all, and paraphrasing Viola Davis, the only thing that separates people of colour from anyone else, is opportunity.

12/04/24 Note: I’ve amended this post because I forgot to mention the most pivotal example of Sydney along with her relationship with Carmy. Also made some slight stylistic changes to phrasing cos i fixate on errors lol

#the bear #the bear hulu #the bear fx #white gaze #critical race theory #carmen berzatto #sydney adamu #tina marrero #ebraheim #marcus brooks #allyship #white privilege #power #chris storer #joanna calo #sydney x carmen #sydcarmy #carmy x sydney

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justagalwhowrites · 6 months

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New in Town - Ch. 9: Second New Year

Ringing in the New Year after you and Joel's first year together. The last chapter of New in Town, found in its entirety on Tumblr here.

Pairing: Best Friend's Dad!Joel Miller x Female Reader

CW: Smut :D. No use of Y/N. Age gap (reader is 35 Joel is 47, not a focus of the fic). Minors DNI, 18+ only

Length: 6.3k

AO3 | First Chapter | Previous Chapter

“Sarah, if you don’t stop fucking with that it’s never going to stay,” you said, glaring at her in the mirror as you drew on eyeliner.

“It’s driving me insane,” she groaned, leaning so close to the hotel bathroom mirror that she was fogging it with her breath, adjusting the false eyelashes for what had to be the millionth time.

“Yeah, because you keep fucking with them,” you said. “You have to give yourself time to adjust to them. Or just take them off because I’m not spending half the night fixing them for you, drawing the line in the sand now.”

“You are absolutely no fun,” she said but she smiled all the same. “It’s New Year’s Eve, I want to look extra good. Plus Nick thinks the long lashes are hot and I am ready for hotel room sex.”

“I didn’t hear that,” Maria called from the bedroom where she was putting on her dress.

“Hotel room sex, hotel room sex, hotel room sex!” Sarah called back.

You laughed, picking up your mascara.

“I don’t think it works like Beetlejuice where you say it enough times it just shows up.”

Sarah laughed back.

“Fuck I hope not,” she said. “Really don’t want to manifest hotel room sex in front of my aunt and my mom.”

She said the last word with a drawn out teasing edge and you had to pull the mascara wand away from your face so you didn’t end up with makeup in your eye from laughing so hard.

“Swear to God if you don’t stop calling me that I will marry your dad just to spite you,” you said once you calmed down again.

“You’re basically already married anyway,” Sarah said. “For the record, I would be fine with it.”

You paused for a second, putting more mascara on the wand and looking at her in the mirror.

“Yeah?” You asked.

“Yeah,” she smiled at you in her reflection. “But don’t expect Mother’s Day gifts from me if it ever happens.”

You snorted, returning to your makeup.

“Better get a bouquet, box of chocolates, the whole nine for holding your hair when you get drunk.”

You couldn’t believe it was already New Year’s Eve again. The last year had gone by so fast it didn’t seem like it could have contained quite as much as it did. But you’d spent almost the entire time so blissfully happy that it made sense that the time felt so damn short.

Things with Joel had been going so well before Sarah found out that it was hard to believe it could really get better, but it did. Not feeling like you were hiding from the most important person in both your lives was like losing a weight you didn’t even know you were carrying. Neither of you were dancing around talking about how you were spending your time now, not being careful about what pictures you sent her and not having to just pretend like a huge part of your life didn’t exist when talking with her.

When she went back to Seattle after Thanksgiving, the three of you started having weekly FaceTime calls, you and Joel sometimes on your couch or at his kitchen table or even in a hotel room in New Orleans once when you decided to get away for your first trip together as a couple.

That Christmas had been the best you’d ever had. Not that there was much competition but Joel and Sarah both had completely brought you into all their holiday traditions. The driving around to look at Christmas lights with a thermos of hot cocoa, the annual trip to Mi Tierra in San Antonio so you could properly appreciate the Christmas lights that apparently were up year round. When Sarah came back to town a few days before Christmas, she dragged you and Joel to the mall and made the three of you take a picture with Santa. You got some funny looks in line - three full blown adults with nary a kid in sight - but Sarah whispered something to woman getting ready to take the picture and she smiled and nodded, helping the three of you get arranged for the photo. You sat lightly on one of Santa’s knees, Sarah on the other, Joel leaning against the side of the large chair. Joel insisted on getting the actual printed photo and, when you picked it up, they also handed you a candy cane and a small Santa figurine. You frowned at it for a second.

“First Santa visits should be commemorated,” the woman behind the counter smiled. “Merry Christmas!”

You looked at Sarah for a second, worried you might cry and she smiled.

“You have a Christmas decoration now,” she said. “But if you really don’t want it at your place, we can add it to the Christmas village at Dad’s!”

You just hugged her and she laughed, hugging you back.

That Christmas, the figurine and the picture sat on the book shelf in your living room, right where you could see them from your couch. The perfect image of the kind of life you’d always wanted to have, one that was filled with people who loved you.

This year, the figurine and picture were at Joel’s because you were, too.

Your lease was up in the fall and, by that point, the two of you were having a hard time remembering the last time you’d slept apart. You were wondering how to broach the subject with Joel - did you just ask if you could move into his house? Was not quite a year of knowing each other too soon? Did you just find a new apartment and never mention it? - when he brought it up one night over dinner.

“Your lease is comin’ up soon, right?” He asked and you froze for a second, a bite of enchilada on your fork half way to your mouth.

“Yeah,” you said when you remembered how to move and respond again. “Six weeks I think? They want me to decide whether or not I’m staying within the next two…”

“Have you thought about if you might want to move in with me?” He asked, his jaw tense but his eyes soft. “Only if… you know… you thought you were ready for that. Just figure I’m at yours or you’re at mine most nights anyway and…”

“Joel,” you smiled, setting your fork down and leaning on the table with your arms crossed in front of you. “Are you asking me to move in with you?”

“Only if you wanted,” he said quickly. “Not tryin’ to… I dunno… put pressure on you or something. Never tried to do this before so…”

You pressed your lips together, trying not to laugh. More at yourself than at Joel. Because of course he was thinking what you were thinking. Of course you were in the same place on this. Of course you were both nervous about bringing it up to each other.

“I’d love to move in with you,” you said once you were sure you had yourself together. “As long as you’re offering because that’s what you really want and not because you think you should.”

“Oh I want it,” he was smiling now and leaning toward you across the table. “Was considering just taking stuff from your place and moving it to mine, get you in the door before you even knew it was happening.”

“That what happened to my sexy underwear?” You teased.

“Nah,” he waved you off. “I stole those to jerk off with when you’re not there because you don’t live with me yet. Can have ‘em back when we unpack the moving truck.”

You moved in a few weeks later. Joel cleared out most of his closet, his jeans and button downs taking up only a small corner of it to begin with, and built you shelving for your purses and shoes. He made space for your things throughout his home, for your favorite pots and pans in the kitchen, for your decorations in the living room. Setting aside the bits and pieces of his life to make sure it could hold yours, too. If he’d asked you to marry him in that moment, you’d have said yes in a heartbeat.

“Oh shit,” you sighed, rifling through your makeup bag. “I think I left my fucking lipstick in my room…”

You went to get your room key from your clutch but Sarah plopped a tube of lipstick in front of you first.

“Use mine,” she said. “I’m almost ready and I don’t want to waste time with you up down three floors and all the way over to your room before we go to the party. I want cocktails, I want music and I want to flirt with my hot boyfriend while I wear a slutty dress.”

“Maria is still getting dressed, I’ve got five minutes…”

“No you don’t!” She called from the bedroom before coming to the bathroom door and turning around. “Zip me?”

You laughed and obeyed, Maria adjusting the dress a bit before turning back around.

“Hey sexy mama!” You whooped at her. “That looks like it was made for you.”

“Right?” She flung her long braids over her shoulder before admiring herself in the full length mirror on the bathroom door. “My pregnancy boobs have shown up but the bump is still in hiding. It’s the perfect dress moment, had to take advantage of it.”

“Hear that little one?” Sarah said, looking toward Maria’s lower stomach. “You’re making your mom look hot!”

“Hotter,” you corrected. “They’re making their mom look hotter.”

You settled for Sarah’s lipstick and the three of you headed for the elevator to go meet up with the guys.

Your first New Year’s Eve with Joel had been far more low key. Sarah was in town and Joel invited Tommy and Maria over to watch the ball drop. You’d ordered pizza and gotten drunk and played charades with your boyfriend’s family and, at midnight, kissed Joel so deeply that you could taste the champagne on his tongue.

This year, you had plenty to celebrate. It was Maria and Tommy’s last one before they became parents - you highly doubted they’d be up until midnight next year. Sarah had gotten promoted and you’d gotten her a job at the Austin branch in August. She had moved back to town just a few months before you moved in with Joel and the three of you had found a comfortable - if unusual - dynamic as a family. And it felt like you had finally found everything you’d ever truly wanted.

Instead of staying home this New Year’s Eve, you all decided to go to a party at one of the nice hotels in Houston. You’d all gotten hotel rooms so no one had to drive and the boys had all gone on ahead to the rooftop bar to hold a table while the three of you got ready to go.

“Crap, one sec,” Sarah said, frowning at her phone as the three of you went for the elevator. “Left something in the room, wait for me, OK? I don’t want to try to find them on my own!”

You and Maria watched her run back to her room - where the three of you had been getting ready - and you frowned as she tottered on her high heels.

“Is she acting weird?” You asked as Maria leaned against the wall.

“Sarah?” Maria laughed. “She’s always weird.”

She came back a few minutes later, tugging her dress down as she went and a little breathless when she got there.

“OK,” she smiled and took a deep breath. “Now we’re good!”

You were almost giddy as you rode the elevator up to the party, feeling the thud of music through the elevator doors before they opened.

It was hard to say why you were just so excited. It wasn’t like you’d never been to a party before - you and Sarah had rung in the New Year at a party a lot like this one that your office had handled the advertising for in Seattle one year - but it felt like something new. Like you were stepping into the first year of your life where everything had finally fallen into place.

“Hey!” Tommy yelled, standing and waving his arm over his head as he saw the three of you leave the elevator. You could barely hear him over the thud of the bass. “Over here!”

“How many beers do you think he’s had?” Maria asked conspiratorially and you laughed.

“Probably the same number mine has,” you replied, smiling at Joel as he craned his neck to get a better look at you.

“Holy hell woman,” he said, getting out of the round booth as you got to the table. He pressed a kiss to your cheek and dropped his voice low. “Not sure I’m gonna take that dress off you later, might need to leave it on.”

You smiled as he gave you a squeeze and you sat down, Joel sliding in beside you, one hand of his going below the table to the inside of your thigh.

One thing that hadn’t changed in the last year was just how insatiable the two of you were for each other. You kept waiting for it to calm down a bit, to stop looking at him and immediately start thinking of how to get him alone and naked as quickly as possible. But Joel was still the single sexiest man you’d ever seen and was still far and away the best in bed. You couldn’t help but want to fuck him all day every day. You were just thankful he seemed to feel the same way about you.

One of your favorite things about living with Joel was your after work routine. When you managed to make it so you left the office around the same time Joel left his job site, you’d join him in the shower, your hair in a knot on top of your head to keep from getting too soaked, Joel still a little sweaty and dirty from a hard day’s work. Sometimes, you just enjoyed each other. You loved the quiet intimacy of it, of being in such a private space together in just your skin, helping him wash the day from his body before he pulled you against him under the water. Other times, Joel pressed you against the cool tile and fucked into you, hard and fast and eager, making your back arch as your leg wrapped around him, the heat of his mouth and the steam filling you when you kissed him.

The new routines had just given you more reasons and opportunities to fuck, it seemed, instead of sex getting lost in the monotony of daily life. Sometimes it was in the middle of late night TV when you were both getting tired on the couch. Sometimes it was when you were putting away laundry. Sometimes it was when you were making dinner.

It was just that, sometimes, it required… additional boundaries.

Sarah had a key to Joel’s place, of course, but she quickly learned that she needed to announce herself before just coming in the door when she wasn’t expected, her walking in the house without warning when he was deep inside of you while you were draped over the kitchen counter was a little too close for comfort for all three of you.

“I have literally never wanted to know less about your sex life,” she shuddered a few hours later when you were sitting in Joel’s back yard, fully clothed with a beer in your hand.

You laughed.

“Never wanted you to know less about it so that works just fine for me.”

You, Joel and Sarah all had dinner together at least once a week, another routine you’d come to love, and you got Sarah all to yourself most days over lunch, happy for the chance to laugh with your best friend.

You weren’t sure life could get much better.

“Oh sweet!” Sarah said as the waitress came by the table, tray of drinks in hand, passing a cosmopolitan to Sarah. “Who knew this was just what I wanted?”

“Happy to take credit for that,” Nick smiled, kissing her cheek and you smiled at him. He was a relatively new addition to Sarah’s life but he seemed promising. You’d never seen her quite so giddy over a guy before and you were trying not to mention it so you wouldn’t jinx it.

When she finally owned up to being hung up on the man, though, you were going to start teasing her as relentlessly as she’d been teasing you. You were getting double wedding jokes lined up and ready, waiting for the perfect moment to hit her with it.

But it was a holiday. You’d take it easy on her for a little while longer. Assuming she stopped calling you Mom.

Joel had been paying attention too, it seemed, and the server handed you a mojito. Appropriate, since you’d just been lamenting the fact that you didn’t have fresh mint at home just two nights before.

“How often are you really gonna muddle mint for a drink?” Joel asked, barely contained smile on his face.

“At least once in a while!” You laughed. “Come on, we could do a whole herb garden in the yard…”

“You are not gonna keep a garden alive.”

“Yes I will!” You protested. He raised his eyebrows at you, incredulous. “If I have the motivation of cocktails I will.”

“Fine,” he sighed but still smiled, kissing your forehead. “In spring I’ll build you a garden and you can kill as many herbs as you want, Beautiful.”

“Is this supposed to bribe me into you not making me a garden?” You teased, taking a sip of the drink.

“Baby, I will make you whatever makes you smile,” he kissed your exposed shoulder. “But if I’m saving the lives of some poor, innocent plants by ordering you a cocktail…”

You laughed and kissed him, the scratch of his facial hair on your skin comforting and familiar.

The party really picked up not long after you got there and you, Sarah and Maria went to dance while the guys hung back to talk for a bit.

“You don’t think they’re being too hard on him do you?” Sarah asked, watching the table.

“Oh I’m sure they’re being super nice,” you said. “Joel and Tommy have never been protective of you, not once.”

“Oh God,” she groaned but she smiled.

“Wouldn’t worry too much,” you laughed. “It looks like he’s weathering it well.”

“Hold on,” Maria smiled and shook her head. “We can get him some help…”

She started waving to Tommy, who clapped Nick on the shoulder and got out of the booth to join his wife on the dance floor. You looked at Joel, eyebrows raised, until he met your gaze and you saw him sigh and smile before heading your way.

You put your arms around his neck and kissed him, pressing tightly to him and feeling every line of him through your clothes. His hands went to your waist, pulling you closer.

“You tryin’ to distract me?” He asked when you pulled away.

“Trying to get you to play nice,” you teased.

“Always play nice,” he said as you turned around in his hold, your ass going back against his hardening length. He lowered his lips to your ear, his breath hot on your skin. “Except when you ask me not to.”

You resisted the urge to drag him back to your hotel room right that second. Instead, you pressed yourself harder against him, moving your body in time to the pulsing, thrumming rhythm. His hands slid to your hips and you couldn’t help but think of how they felt on your bare skin.

But you managed to keep it together for a few songs, dancing until you were breathless and you really couldn’t take it anymore. You draped yourself around Joel again, pressing your lips to his ear.

“Order me a water and another mojito,” you said, your hand sliding into his pocket, brushing his half hard cock through his jeans, as you grabbed your phone. “And check your texts.”

You didn’t give him a chance to respond, just meeting his wide eyes for a moment before slipping into the crowd. You went around to the pool area of the rooftop, far quieter than the bar and the dance floor, the lounge chairs all stacked up next to a storage space that looked like it would provide the perfect cover from the dance floor. You took a selfie with just a glimpse of the thudding party in the background and texted it to him.

“Come find me.”

It didn’t take him long, coming around the corner while glancing back over his shoulder, looking nervous. You grabbed a fistful of his shirt and pulled him into you, your back against the storage room.

“You are up to no good,” he said, pressing you back against the wall, his mouth covering yours, his body warm against the cool night air. “Tryin’ to get us kicked out of the damn hotel?”

His hand went to your breast, anyway.

“We can keep our clothes on,” you panted against him. “Be very well behaved. Like that time in the bathroom.”

“Fuck, Beautiful,” he groaned, putting his thigh between your legs, your skirt covering part of his jeans. He rocked his hips against you, his hands going to your waist, the outline of his hard cock against your stomach. “Wanna make me come in my pants like a fucking teenager?”

“Don’t think we’re making it to midnight any other way,” you were needy, aching as you ground your pussy down on the straining muscle of his leg.

“Still gonna let me fuck you later?” He kissed down your neck, rutting harder against you, your hands on his shoulders, grip tightening.

“You think I’m starting a new year without you inside me as soon as possible you’re insane.”

He laughed a little and nipped at your collarbone before pulling you tighter against his leg, making you moan. You started working yourself harder and faster against him, pulling him tighter to you, your wetness soaking your panties.

“You’re close, aren’t you, Baby?” He asked, voice dark. Your motions stuttered but you nodded frantically against him. “Gonna come all over my fucking leg aren’t you? Come from just riding my fucking thigh?”

You were close enough that you’d lost the ability to speak. You just nodded again and he kissed you, hard and messy and deep and you pressed yourself firmly against his leg as you fell apart, the tight coil inside yourself snapping as your clit throbbed against him.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” He gasped as he pressed his cock hard against you and you felt him throbbing there, spilling into his jeans before slumping against you. His nose brushed yours for a moment and you smiled, kissing him lightly.

“You’re going to kill me,” he laughed a little breathlessly. “More than a year into this and you still want me to fuck you so bad you’re dragging me away from a party?”

“That’s nothing,” you teased. “Wait until we’re really old and we’re finding ways to sneak around the nursing home.”

He laughed and kissed you again.

“Love you so fuckin’ much.”

It was easier to focus on the party after that. Tommy gave Joel a look when you made it back to the table and Joel told him to mind his own business and you laughed and drank your mojito.

By the time midnight rolled around, you’d been pleasantly tipsy for more than an hour, draping yourself over Joel at every opportunity when you weren’t dancing with Sarah and Maria. As the countdown started, the six of you crowded onto the dance floor with everyone else, champagne in hand, Joel’s arm around you as he held you to his side.

“Three, two, one!”

Joel turned you to him and kissed you before you’d even had a chance to yell happy New Year and you sank into him, almost forgetting about the drink in your hand until some of it dribbled down your wrist, making you laugh against his lips.

“Couldn’t let a second of the year go by before I kissed you for the first time,” he said, his lips still close to yours. The knot of heat and wanting that had eased after your antics earlier was back with full force.

“Good,” you said quietly, drinking in the hungry look in his eyes.

“It’s supposed to be a toast, you insatiable weirdos,” Sarah laughed and you laughed back, separating from Joel far enough to raise your glasses and toast with your new found family.

It wasn’t long before all of you made your way to the elevators, piling into one with a handful of strangers, you happy for the excuse to stay pressed tightly against Joel.

“Good luck!” Tommy said, a teasing edge to his voice when the doors dinged open on your floor.

You frowned at him, confused, as the doors closed and you laughed a little as Joel led you back to the room.

“Why do you need luck? Is Tommy under the impression that you have to work to get sex out of me?” You teased. “Because it’s sweet that you’d protect my honor that way but we both know that’s a damn lie.”

“Tommy’s just a dumbass,” Joel replied. “Ignore him, that’s what I do.”

You laughed, the tail end of your buzz waning.

“Thinking we should take full advantage of that jacuzzi tub,” you said as Joel unlocked the hotel room door. “And use it to research the investment of a hot tub in the back yard…”

“You’re insatiable,” he teased, opening the door for you.

You laughed and were so busy looking at him - his thick, dark hair that was flecked with gray; his plush lips; his soft eyes - that it took you a second to realize there were roses and petals all over the room, a bottle of wine chilled in a bucket on the small table.

“Joel?” You looked back at him and he just shrugged, smiling.

You went further into the room and realized that it wasn’t just flowers and wine. There were framed pictures of you and Joel from the last year of your lives together. One of the two of you on Bourbon Street, another from when you decided to actually take those wine tasting classes you’d talked about, one from your second Longhorn’s game. There were at least a dozen, each one making it look so, so obvious that you made each other happy. That you gave each other the lives you wanted.

You picked up the picture by the bedside, the first selfie you’d ever taken together. You were hiking and you’d held your arm out far enough to try to capture some of the view behind you. You were smiling hugely at the camera, hair grimy with sweat, Joel’s arm around your shoulders. But he wasn’t looking at the camera. Instead, he was looking at you. Looking at you like you were the only thing worth looking at. Looking at you like you made him happier than just about anything else on Earth.

“What…” You trailed off, looking up from the picture to see Joel, on one knee with a box in his hands at the foot of the bed.

You gasped and jumped, your hands covering your mouth on instinct, eyes wide. Your feet moved before you really realized what was happening and it seemed sudden that you were right in front of him.

“Joel,” you breathed, trembling hands slowly leaving your face.

“For a very long time,” he said, his voice assured. “It felt like I’d gotten the only good thing I was going to get out of life. I had Sarah and seemed wrong to ask for more than that so I wasn’t lookin’ for it. Wasn’t lookin’ for you. But then I found you - or you found me, anyway - and I realized just how good life could be as long as I got to live it next to you.

“You are the single best person I’ve ever met. You’re so smart and funny and creative and kind and the most fun I’ve ever had and I can’t imagine anything better than getting to live the rest of my life with you. Will you make me the happiest man on Earth and marry me?”

***

Joel wasn’t sure his heart had ever beat this fast. Maybe when Sarah was first born and there were the torturous few seconds of silence before she started crying, not sure how anything about pregnancy or babies worked. Definitely never since.

But the silence between you seemed to drag on for an eternity even though he knew it could have only been a second or two. That didn’t stop his heart from racing.

“Yes,” you nodded, your voice thick, tears in your eyes. “Yes, yes, yes, yes yes!”

You damn near tackled him and he laughed, catching you and holding onto you as he lowered the two of you to the ground on a bed of rose petals.

Joel, Tommy and Nick had been in here getting everything set up while Sarah and Maria kept you busy in Sarah’s room. There was a brief moment of panic when Sarah texted that the three of you were headed to the party and Joel had to ask her to buy at least two minutes because they were walking to the elevator themselves.

“I’m so happy for you, man,” Tommy said, clapping Joel on the shoulder as they headed up to the party. “You deserve this, you really fuckin’ do.”

“She ain’t said yes yet,” Joel said, feeling the nerves all sudden and hot under his skin. “Don’t jinx it.”

“She’ll say yes,” Tommy said, sounding so confident. “Don’t ask me WHY but that woman adores you. She’s gonna love it.”

He hoped you did. He hoped you loved the idea at all, that you loved the proposal, that you loved the ring. Sarah had helped pick that part out so he was more confident of that, finding a piece that was elegant without looking dated, something that he hoped you’d like wearing for the rest of your life.

Because that’s what he wanted. He wanted you, wanted to make you happy, for the rest of your life.

He slid the ring onto your finger, the diamond catching the light as he did.

“Are you serious?” You asked, looking from the ring to him.

“Serious about spending the rest of my life with you?” He asked. “Can’t think of anything better.”

You threw your arms around his neck and kissed him, hard and needy. He leaned into it for a moment before he pulled back from you.

“Should move to the bed,” he breathed. “Gotta treat my fiancee right.”

You just nodded quickly and Joel got up before helping you to your feet.

He tugged your dress up and over your head - as much as he wanted to fuck you in the sexy little thing you’d been tempting him with all night, the need to feel your skin was too great - and eased you down onto the bed.

You moved to the middle of it and Joel got undressed, his eyes watching you hungrily, the glint of his ring on your finger making him somehow even harder. You removed your bra and cast it aside before you slipped your panties down your legs and tossed them to the side, leaving you exposed and bare. You were everything it seemed like he’d ever wanted and you were his, the proof of it right there on your hand. He fisted his cock, pumping himself once, twice, as he climbed between your legs.

He wanted to make this last. He wanted to go down on you and swallow your pleasure until you were screaming with it. He wanted to kiss every inch of your skin. He wanted to tease you with his fingers until you were begging for his cock. But he wasn’t sure he could, not that moment. He had a feeling you wouldn’t be leaving the bed for a few days after this.

“Joel,” you panted, watching him, pupils blown and back arched. He smiled. For some reason, you wanted him like he wanted you.

“Yes, Mrs. Miller?” He breathed, settling between your open legs, the apex of your thighs hot against his skin. You moaned and rocked your hips up against him, your needy little clit pressing into his skin.

“Fuck,” you moaned, closing your eyes, fingers gripping his bicep tightly. “Love the sound of that…”

“You have no idea, Beautiful,” he said, kissing you, grinding his cock against your dripping slit. You moaned, the movement of your hips stuttering for a moment before you adjusted the angle so the tip of him was catching on your entrance with ever pass, just enough for the most sensitive part of him to be enveloped in your tight, wet heat.

“Need you,” you were almost gasping with it, desperate and wanting. “Please, please, need to feel you, I need…”

“Always going to give you what you need, Baby,” he said, his cock dipping further into you this time before he pulled back and pushed himself against your clit again. “Always gonna take care of you, always.”

He pushed into you then, firm but not to fast, your breath catching on your throat as he did. Joel kissed you, trying not to think about how damn good you felt, how it seemed like he belonged right there, deep inside you.

“Fuck,” your nails dug into him but he held on. “Fuck, you feel so fucking good how do you feel this fucking good?”

He could only moan in response, fucking into you, feeling you open up to him, your walls gripping him tight. He stayed still inside you for a moment, savoring it, the feeling of you around him while he was over you, the way you held onto him.

But he couldn’t last that way for long. You - his fiancee. His fiancee, no one else’s, you belonged to no one but him - felt too damn good for him to last too long inside of you and he had to move, he had to.

So he did, starting a little slower but still firm, pressing his hips into you so your hot little clit was against his skin.

He could feel you starting to tighten around him, like your body was trying to pull him deeper somehow, your lips messy and desperate when they found his, trialing little kisses over his body when they don’t.

“That’s it, Beautiful,” he panted into you. “Come for me, can feel how close you are, just let go for me, let me feel you. Need to feel you…”

You gasped his name and pressed your whole body tight against him as you came around him, your pussy fluttering around him, working his cock, all warm and soft trying to pull him as deep as you could take him. He fucked you through it, hardly able to hold off his own orgasm, the aftershocks of yours still rippling through your tight channel when he emptied himself into you until he didn’t even have the strength to hold himself up anymore, collapsing on you, his head over your shoulder so he could smell your skin and your hair. Fuck, he loved that smell. Fuck, he loved you.

After a minute, he adjusted the two of you so you were draped over his chest, your arms all soft and pliant, close enough that he could feel your heartbeat on his skin, feel your soft, little breaths on him. You held up your left hand, turning the ring back and forth in the light.

“You’re sure about this?” You asked, glancing up at him as you fidgeted with the ring.

“More sure than I’ve ever been about anything,” he said. “Would make you Mrs. Miller tomorrow if you’d let me.”

You laughed a little at that, putting your hand down on his chest and taking a deep breath.

“Doesn’t seem fair,” you said softly.

“What doesn’t?”

“You’ve given me so much,” you said. “You’ve given me everything I’ve ever wanted - everything. Feels like I’m not holding up my end.”

“You kiddin’ me?” He scoffed. “You’re so perfect I have to remind myself that you’re real sometimes, that I’m not just imagining you. You make me the luckiest man on Earth every damn day by just breathing in the same room as me. If anything’s not fair, it’s that I got too greedy asking you to marry me. Should know to quit when I’m this far ahead.”

You laughed and pressed your lips into his chest, looking at the ring again, twisting it this way and that with your thumb.

“Make you a deal,” you said, adjusting your head so you were looking at him.

“What’s your proposal?” He asked, teasing.

“You take care of me,” you said. “Make sure I’m not getting too overwhelmed or overdoing it at work or just getting too in my own head. I’ll take care of you, make sure you take time for yourself, make sure you relax, make sure you know how great you are. Deal?”

He smiled a little.

“Deal, Mrs. Miller.”

You smiled bigger.

“Excellent, Mr. Miller.”

He kissed your forehead.

“Don’t have to change your last name, you know,” he said, giving you a squeeze. “I can always just call you that for my own damn enjoyment without making it official.”

You laughed a little.

“No, I want to change it,” you said. “Sarah was right all along. I think I’m going to make a great Miller.”

A/N: Ahhh! I hope you all loved reading the story of Joel and Sarah's best friend as much as I loved sharing it! These two are so fun and so sweet, I'm so glad I got to give them the happy ending they deserved.

Thank you so so much for being here, for following along with this little story that started as a one shot based on a request that came in after I wrote another one shot as a request. I so appreciate that you're here, that you've spent your time with this fic and these characters and all of your support. This corner of the internet means everything to me and it's because you're a part of it <3 Love you!

Taglist: @fanficismydrug

#fanfic #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller x oc #new in town #joel miller smut

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