#i feel like i have to make the strongest disclaimer ever as if anyone actually thinks this is about queerness and say the context is-- | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ququb444hm · 5 months

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𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐤𝐬 𝐚 𝐥𝐨𝐭, 𝐜𝐮𝐩𝐢𝐝

part 31 / old man ☆

masterlist

important note!! there is the implication of a panic attack in this part so if that makes u uncomfortable, please do not continue reading! i am sorry in advance if i offend anyone by the way i write out the panic attack. i have not experienced one before and am basing the information solely on research i have done beforehand as well as the experiences of my friends. and for anyone who has experienced a panic attack, U R ONE OF THE STRONGEST PEOPLE EVER!

“geez, the school needs to start providing free umbrellas or something!” coach ukai exclaimed. he stared at his two players and team manager– tetsu, kozume, and yn were all dripping wet and shivering from the intense weather. “we’re ending practice a bit early so just grab a towel and dry yourselves up a bit or go take a quick shower in the locker room so you at least don’t catch a cold before the game next week.”

“yes, coach.” the three nodded, quickly making their way to the showers.

“yn!” mori called out, running up to his friend with a hoodie in hand. “change into this after so you’re not cold.”

yn eyed the material, smirking once she realized who it belonged to. “did rinnie give this to you?” she mused, “ohoho, so are you guys talking or what?”

“oh shut up, go take a shower. you smell like wet dog.” mori grumbled, shoving the hoodie into yn’s arms. yn giggled, thanking mori before heading into the girls locker room.

(note: guys.. i don’t actually ship mori n rin LOL js a disclaimer bc ik (or im pretty sure) they like haven’t met in the actual series…? they’re more of a sub-plot like cece n tetsu bc i love side character lore! anyways back to the storyyy)

once yn was done freshening up, she joined coach ukai and mr. takeda on the bleachers to talk about the game. "the team is looking good," coach examined. he watched as the players went up against each other in a quick match. "i just don't know what to do about kozume and keiji." he rubbed the back of his neck, deep in thought as he analyzed the papers yn gave him last practice.

"what do you mean?" yn asked. she didn't recall writing anything weird about the two.

coach ukai shrugged. "maybe it's because i've known these kids since they were freshmen, but something just feels off between the two. i compared your notes from the beginning of the semester to last week, and there's a slight decline in their abilities."

yn furrowed her brows, taking the papers from coach ukai to see the difference herself. "a decline?" her eyes scanned the data and much to her surprise, he was right. kozume's agility went down by 2.5% and keiji's been struggling to successfully set the ball up for kou which puts the team at a big disadvantage since kou is normally always on the court and has the most trust in keiji to send him the ball.

(note again: idk what i js pulled out of my ass w this one >o< i don’t play volley but wtvr! :3)

"speaking of kozume and keiji, where are they?" mr. takeda piped up. tetsurou finished showering at the same time as yn and was currently talking to a few members, assumingly giving them tips for next week, but kozume was still nowhere to be seen. there couldn’t have been only one working shower right?

"bokuto!" coach ukai called out, "where's your setter?"

"uhh-" kou looked around, "not on the court, coach!"

keishin groaned. "well, obviously.."

"keiji is in the locker room, pretty sure.” kei answered instead. he heard the setter excuse himself to grab something in the locker room, but what would he need in there when they usually dropped their things off on the bleachers? the middle blocker shrugged it off, not caring too much about his upperclassman.

“uhm i think kozume is also still in there.” shoyou added. his eyes met yn’s, both of them starting to feel a bit uneasy after talking about the two last night. “do you want me to go grab them?” keishin sighed, motioning for shoyou to retrieve the two missing players.

as shoyou neared the red-painted metal doors, his ears picked up keiji’s voice. he sounded annoyed. really annoyed. “you can’t be seriously telling me you won’t leave yn alone, right? right? kozume c’mon,” keiji laughed in mockery, his voice was getting a bit louder, but not loud enough to reach the ears of the other people on the other side of the gym. “you’re just going to keep hurting her. she doesn’t deserve that. you don’t deserve her.”

“like you have any place to talk,” kozume barked back. though not as aggravated as keiji, kozume was firm with his words. “you made yn feel unimportant the whole time the two of you were in a relationship. you were the one who had an interest in her first, yet you barely took the time to show any effort. you couldn’t even go to one of the most important events in her life! she worked so hard, she always does, for the annual art exhibition, but you forgot about it.”

“i had an important meeting that day-” keiji tried to reason.

kozume only scoffed. “oh please.”

“okay. fine.” shoyou could hear heavy footsteps. keiji was corning kozume into the lockers. he pressed an accusing finger against his chest. “missing the art exhibition was a dick move, but am i the one who’s going for their friend’s ex? am i the one who would publicly reject yn, yet give her mixed signals behind closed doors, continuously confusing her and manipulating her feelings? am i the one who can’t make up his mind, slowly declining yn’s mental and emotional well-being? no, kozume, i’m not. you are. know your place. yn doesn’t need you.”

it was quiet for a few seconds before shoyou could hear keiji’s footsteps walking toward the door he was pressing his ear against. in a quick panic, the ginger hid behind a nearby scoreboard until he saw keiji far enough to where he wouldn’t see the worried sophomore slip into the locker room.

“kozume!” shoyou cried out. the blond was in a fetal position on the floor against the lockers. he rocked back and forth, the frantic movement almost causing him to hit his head against the hard metal. his breathing was short and unstable, almost like he was choking. it was even more difficult to breathe due to his strained cries. the state of his close friend made shoyou sick to his stomach, his body trembled, not knowing what to do. “what- whats happening?!” he tried to prevent kozume from accidentally injuring himself, but once his hand made contact with kozume’s shoulder, the blond slapped his hand away.

“don’t touch me!” he cried out. his eyes grew in panic, everything around him was overwhelming him past his limit.

shoyou fell back at the sudden impact, “kozume-”

“i’m sorry,” kozume dug his head back into his arms. “i’m sorry i’m sorry i’m sorry i’m sorry i’m sorry-” he repeated the same words over and over again, each apology more desperate than the last. ‘i hit shoyou? why did i hit shoyou?’ “i didn’t mean it- i didn’t i-” his voice was restless, saying the same thing over and over as his mind grew louder by the second. ‘i hurt shoyou. i hurt yn. i can’t stop. i don’t know what to do. i can’t stop. it hurts. everything hurts. i hurt yn. my heart wont shut up. it’s so loud. everything is so loud. please shut up. please shut up. shut up. shut up. shut up-’

“kozume i don’t know what to do!” shoyou sobbed. the situation was getting to much for him, he needed to call someone for help. “i’m going to get yn, she’ll know what to do-”

“SHUT UP.” shoyou stopped in his tracks, body cold at the sudden yell. kozume’s head jerked up at his own words, disbelief written across his face. was he the one who yelled that? “please don’t get yn. please- shoyou please.” he was tirelessly begging. tears constructing his vision enough to not even know if shoyou was opening the door or not. “please. please don’t call yn. i don’t- she can’t know. please. i’m sorry i yelled. i’m sorry- just. just- don’t move.”

shoyou slowly removed his hand from the door handle. his movements were slow, scared that he might suddenly alarm kozume again. he squeezed his eyes shut, breathing long and slow to calm his nerves so that he could at least provide some sort of ease to kozume. “okay…” he whispered, slowly opening his eyes. shoyou bent down to kozume’s level, leaving a foot of space between them as he tried to calm the blond’s nerves as he just did his own. “it’s okay koz. it’s okay.” continuing the breathing exercise he was previously doing, shoyou used his hands to motion each inhale, each hold of breath, and each exhale.

“i’m sorry.” kozume murmured, unable to meet shoyou’s gaze. he was slowly regaining stable breathing, the pain in his chest diminishing.

“don’t apologize!” shoyou scolded. “i’m the one who should say sorry, kozume.” the ginger choked back his tears, refraining from overwhelming his friend. “i didn’t know what to do and i couldn’t help you..”

kozume shook his head, “you did help, sho. thank you.” a small smile graced his features, reassuring his friend.

the two sat in silence for a few minutes until shoyou decided to let his curiosity flow free. “kozume, can i ask you something?” the blonde nodded. “what's happening between you and keiji? and why can’t yn know about this? why are you hiding it from her?”

kozume let out a weak laugh. “that’s more than just a something.”

“sorry, i just don’t get it!” shoyou whined. “yn likes you, a lot, and i thought you really like yn too. so why are u letting keiji get in the way and talk you down like that? why are you so afraid of letting yourself be happy?”

the familiar question rang through kozume’s mind. a previous conversation from tetsurou suddenly resurfacing.

“are you afraid of letting yourself be happy or something? look, i’m not saying you should’ve prevented keiji from asking yn out, but you’ve liked my sister since what? the second grade? and you just let some new guy sweep her off her feet? that’s just crazy, man! i know for a fact that he could never have the same connection you and her have, trust me, i’m like psychic or something. i know you’re the better person–- the only person, actually, for yn.”

“it’s not that…” kozume groaned. “i’m afraid that…if yn and i do become something more than what we are now, i’ll disappoint her more than i already do. what if, once we start dating, she realizes she doesn’t actually like me?”

shoyou frowned. keiji’s words were dug deep into kozume’s heart. nothing he could say, no amount of reassurance could ever directly change kozume’s mindset. it needed to come from her–

knock. knock. knock.

“sho? kozume? are you guys okay? i- uhm we’re getting worried…you two have been in there for a long time, is everything okay?”

there she was. the only person who could dissolve all of keiji’s cruel words from kozume’s distraught soul.

“sorry, we’ll be out in a sec, nn!” shoyou called out. he reached a hand out for kozume to take. “are you okay to go outside?”

the blonde took a deep breath. “we have a game next week, don’t we?” he placed his hand on shoyou’s, pulling himself up.

the two opened the door to reveal yn’s big doe eyes brimming with concern. “what happened? did you lose your towel? was the water too cold?” she enveloped kozume’s hands into her own, feeling the difference in temperature. “if you didn’t have any warm water, you should’ve told us! taking a cold shower after being soaked in the rain isn’t good for you!”

“hey!” coach ukai irked, already frustrated that kozume would only have less than an hour to practice. “stop feeling the boy up and let him get his ass to work!”

yn’s eye twitched at the suggestive assumption. she quipped her head at keishin and flipped him off. “shut up, old man!”

part 30 sassy man apocalypse <- | masterlist | -> part 32 nipples in a twist

note(s): hnnghghghgrfijwfmgh next part is a text msg part

✩⡱ taglist !! + @writing-for-the-hell-of-it @sherryuki-callmeyuki @anny-bah @ast4rg1rl @sukunasrealgf @dani-shitting-around @whokillednyx @vernon-dursley @limaswife @sugawara-levi @sixxze @ryoiii @literally-a-ferret @444sunarin @llearlert @lloyd4x @usermins @2baddies-1porsche @vernon-dursley @lyzisbitchingagain @h3xi2g0n3 @l0v3do11 lmk if u want to be added (msg or inbox)ヾ(･ω･`；)ﾉ

#🐈.thanksalotcupid #kozume kenma #kenma kozume #kozume kenma x reader #kozume kenma x fem!reader #kenma kozume x reader #kenma kozume x fem!reader #kenma x reader #kozume x reader #smau #kenma smau #haikyuu #haikyuu smau #haikyuu!!#haikyuu!! smau

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tiniestjellifish · 2 years

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Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness (2022)

Okay, I will put the disclaimer that I have NOT seen the first Dr. Strange movie in the franchise. But I do watch Marvel movies, and I think I’ve seen enough to make an opinion about how he was portrayed because I’ve seen his interactions with other in the bulk of the MCU. I also know how a typical Marvel movie plays out. But also, if you’re reading this,,, I have absolutely nothing to prove to you and if you don’t like my opinion,, then don't take it to heart?

If you hadn't gotten around to watching WandaVision like myself. Doesn't matter lol. the first 10 mins of the movie literally answers any of the questions one would’ve had from the show. it also makes going back to watch it obsolete. So I will be watching it anyways, but just know, that it takes care of that for you.

This movie comes what I will assume to be RIGHT after Far From Home (2021). As far as chronologically within the movies, I think there’s little to no gap after the movie. Maybe the span of a month or two has passed at max.

Those are just technicalities that I wanted to touch on before getting to the review.

The film was a lot more of a lax take on Dr. Strange. That was actually a great deal of the plot as well, that he took himself too seriously and couldn’t accept help. Especially when he needed it. He didn't like to acknowledge anyone else’s way but his own. And now this is a personal thing, but I hate the trope of adults bettering themselves because a kid was introduced into their life. No, I’m not gonna pat you on the back for treating a child with human decency. Like I’m glad I guess that this child made you wanna be better but also eh? Like why can’t you just take it like a grown up when another peer of yours tells you that you’re closed off to the assistance of others and its stunting the growth of your social interactions. Because I feel like the kid trope always leads to giving off this false sense of “oh look how they changed for that kid? they’re so pure and wonderful now. they should be a parent”. no. no they should not.

And the longer I think about it, it slightly contrasts with the other plot line Wanda has going on which is that she refuses to come to grips with the fact that within the reality she exists, “her” kids do not exist. And she cannot simply hope universes to try and steal those kids away from another version of her. That’s not how it works and its not fair. Because it isn’t you’re not their mother. This isn't a plot I take issue with, but it supplements the other side of the sword with doctor strange because someone could be like “wanda should be like him :D”. yes and no. she needs to be willing to take no for an answer but also, changing is an ever going process. you don’t correct little things and then are just done forever.

I love America Chavez’s character. I haven't read her comics so I can’t make a comparison as to how well she was translated to the screen. But based only on what I saw, she’s a very resilient, determined, and has a strong moral compass. I like her a lot.

I think this movie wasn’t the next big Marvel feature. And I don't think anyone expected it to be (or least I hope not). But it does a good job as an addition film. I’m just making this a term because i’m just trying to say as far as being another movie installment in an ongoing franchise. it succeeded. like this is more of a pass/fail kind of movie. And I will say it passed.

I feel like I’m getting a little tired of Marvel having these “somewhat closure” inserts for the characters. There were also a lot of times in the movie where I thought to myself, they could’ve fixed the issue sooner realistically and shaved 45 mins off the movie but I know Marvel doesn’t roll like that. I’m also tired of how popular the multiverse is becoming as a fallback plot/trope. I will say the fan service in the movie was cute. But I don't like that they had a captain marvel and scarlet witch face off scene and technically captain marvel is canonically the strongest marvel character (unless I’m mistaken), if not she’s definitely up there. I’m just getting at the fact that I don’t think consistency wise that between the two of them that Wanda won, even if I like her.

Rating: 6.5 or 7/10

#dr strange #marvel #hot take #movie review #film critic #multiverse of madness

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pot-of-terv · 3 years

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Disclaimer: This starts soft but very quickly goes to a place I did NOT expect it to go so, just, be prepared. I guess there were some things my muse just couldn’t leave untouched :_D There’s also an additional drawing in there somewhere among the text. The ending is kind of a cliffhanger (dun dun duuun... part three is coming!!) but it’s happy (hurt/comfort y’all, MY BRAND)!

Also I have to say- oh my goodness this ended up having over 2,000 words and I’ve never written a fic this long! This feels pretty amazing but also, very scary, because as you know I’m a Finn so English is not my first language and this far I’ve stuck to just writing itty bitty things. Writing a story with multiple parts is also new to me, so wow, actually, thank you PuzzleJune for making me challenge myself in fresh and exciting ways 🥺

tw: breakdown

PuzzleJune2021, Week Two: Space (Quiet)

It is mesmerising. Intoxicating, even, Atem muses as he reaches up to rub his own sleep-soft face, eyes never leaving the still sleeping figure beside him. He shifts to lay on his side, slowly, with deliberate movements, trying to not disturb the quiet of the early morning.

Watching him sleep like this... I can feel the bed move when he moves and his warmth whenever he's close enough. I never had that before, he thinks and his heart clenches. I have it now.

Yuugi snorts in his sleep and Atem can't help but smile. That boy... no, that young man, has been through so much, too much, and yet he still sleeps so soundly. It's nothing short of incredible and the pharaoh wonders if he's ever met anyone more deserving of respect and admiration. Their journey thus far has only lasted for a couple of years and during that short time, the former spirit of the Millenium Puzzle has had the first-row seat to witnessing Yuugi's strength, his growth - how he slowly but surely had begun to trust himself.

Atem turns his gaze away from Yuugi and mulls over that thought. It hurts him somewhere deep in his core to remember how little worth Yuugi had seen in himself during those first months after Atem's consciousness awakened. He touches his chest where his heart is and leaves his hand there, feeling the slow rhythm beating under his palm.

That feeling of self-doubt could as well be his own, for he did think he was Yuugi for a while back then. It's a troubling realisation and he frowns at the ceiling. Despite not having any memories, how many of those insecurities had been Atem's own that he subconsciously reflected towards Yuugi's heart and by doing so unknowingly meddled with Yuugi's self-image as a whole? Objectively he knows that his emergence helped Yuugi gain confidence even though he didn't remember those first few times Atem took his place, but subjectively...? Atem's brows knit tighter together and he balls the hand that rests on his chest into a fist.

To call these thoughts troubling is an understatement. Suddenly Atem feels uncomfortably restless, he can't keep still, he needs space, he has to move. But moving would mean leaving the warm blankets and the even warmer form next to him and risk waking him in the process.

His chest feels so tight and it aches in a way Atem hasn't felt in millennia and he squeezes his eyes shut, holds his breath and with one swift movement pushes the blankets off of himself, sits up and rolls to the side to plant his feet onto the floor. The wood is cool under the bare soles of his feet and that sudden feeling makes him pause for a moment. He releases the breath he was holding.

It's almost funny how he already feels better. He glances over his shoulder to see if he had woken Yuugi up but the other youth seems undisturbed, still fast asleep. Relieved, Atem stands up... and doesn't know what to do. It's still practically night time and the house is silent. Mama Mutou and Grandpa will be getting up in one to two hours and Yuugi much later than that if his previous findings are to be trusted. Normally he would happily snooze the morning away with Yuugi but he doesn't want to go back to bed, the restlessness still buzzing under his skin even though that unpleasant tightness in his chest has ebbed and is now just a nuisance instead of actual, painful anxiety.

He turns around to face the bed so he can take another look at Yuugi, properly. A glance wasn't enough. Will never be enough, he realises all of a sudden. I want to be looking at Yuugi, and only Yuugi, forever. How can his heart feel so big and full but so small at the same time?

Atem is overwhelmed, not yet used to the absolute link between his feelings and his physical senses, and he lifts his hand once more to his chest, almost desperately grasping his shirt and pressing his fist against his heart, to feel the beat of it, and the warmth of his body.

He has this body now and he should be so, so thankful for it, but at this moment he can only feel guilt. He loves Yuugi but has still put him through so much and he knows, oh how he knows, that the trip to Egypt broke him. Atem had felt Yuugi mourn him weeks beforehand, felt his grief he so valiantly tried to conceal - too bad their bond at that point was the strongest it had ever been and Atem knew. It took everything in him to keep on going, to keep on telling himself that this was the right thing to do, this was how he could repay Yuugi's kindness and let him go on with his life, let him be free. He had heard the modern phrase “if you love them let them go”, and wouldn't that have been so grand? To prove his love in such a poetic, profound way?

All that in spite of Yuugi's feelings screaming at him that to be separated was the last thing he wanted.

Atem chuckles, a bitter taste in his mouth. Despite having shared such an extraordinary bond, communication had never been their strongest point, duels usually excluded, and talking about their feelings was not an exception. Still isn’t. They both had just kept on doing what they thought was the best for the other and in the process ended up wounding each other in ways that Atem isn't sure he can ever truly understand. Yesterday he had come down to the kitchen to find Yuugi folding laundry, eyes puffy and red, yet when he talked he sounded so happy. Atem had left it at that because there's nothing he could do when confronted by that smile that can put even the Sun in shade.

Slowly he realises that he's been staring at his partner for such a long time that it must be bordering on creepy. How did he get here from that warmth he first woke up to, from that love he so deeply feels for Yuugi? Why hasn’t he thought about these things before? It's like all he has in his head are questions with no answers to calm his mind. It's only been a week since... since it all should've ended, but didn't, all because of Atem's selfishness. Selfishness... and love. His own heart had broken when his life points counted down to zero and he saw the utter hopelessness he felt surface in his heart reflected right back at him on Yuugi's face. The memory of it is still so strong that he has to grit his teeth together to keep his jaw from trembling.

He hadn’t been able to stand that expression, to stand the knowledge that he was the cause of it. He wasn’t good enough. He wasn’t good enough. The pride he had felt toward Yuugi's skill was completely overshadowed by the grief that hit him in waves, his legs feeling like lead as he slowly walked to Yuugi, his own voice distant to his ears as he offered words of consolation and praise. Empty words, they were, he knew it then and he knows it now. How could he ever leave this person who had gone through so much for him, because of him, who had loved him so fully, who had risked it all to be there for him in his quest to regain his memories even when knowing that the price for that would be too steep to consider if Yuugi ever stopped to do that?

Atem had never wanted to leave. He had learned to live again, to have friends, and grow as a person, no matter how minuscule that growth might have been. Yuugi had been him and then Yuugi had become his world. There's no other way to explain it. As much as Atem had longed for his memories, for those people he loved and lost all those thousands of years ago, he couldn't bear the thought of losing another family. Even when the prize would be to regain his first one.

But he had to. He had thought he had to.

Yet when he was just about to take the last step, he had faltered. Had wondered - does it have to be this way? What if there's another choice he could make?

And the gods had answered him. He didn't have to beg, he didn't have to fight, he just had to ask.

Just ask.

It had been so simple, in the end, so effortless. Of course, Atem asked for that third choice - or didn't really even ask, he didn't dare, he wished for it, his heart on the verge of breaking a second time. He had been painfully aware of his friends behind him, holding their breaths, waiting for the end. Atem felt their feelings wrap around him like a cloak and he bore the weight of it, accepted it, as he couldn't quite believe that it would be that easy to stay. So he had wished.

And that wish had been granted.

And now he is here.

Standing in the middle of the floor in Yuugi's room while Yuugi sleeps, hands closed into fists, both grasping his shirt now, holding back tears that threaten to spill forth. Wondering why did he even put Yuugi through all that, when in the end, it was for nothing? Oh, he thinks, oh, how it hurts. His own shortcomings, his own pain, the pain that he had caused others. Especially the pain that he had caused Yuugi. He hadn’t deserved it, he never deserved something so cruel and insincere as Atem's decision to leave had been.

A sob wrangles itself up and out of his mouth, he's not able to stop it in time and that breaks his resolve. He sways on his feet as tears force their way out and streak his cheeks, fall into his shirt and seep into the fabric as he hiccups and tries half-heartedly to stop it. He shouldn't be crying, not after everything he’s done. He doesn’t deserve to feel so sorry for himself - he should be the one to take responsibility, to carry that burden without a hitch. But, the thing is… at this moment, he’s no longer the prince-then-pharaoh from 3000 years ago. He’s no longer the amnesiac spirit occupying the Puzzle. He’s not the King of Games.

At this moment, he’s just a 16-year-old boy who is desperately trying to deal with every responsibility he’s imagined are only his to bear and failing spectacularly. So he cries, and cries, and he can no longer see with how blurry his eyes have gone. He prays Yuugi won't wake up to it, he just has to suffer through it and he'll be fine. Crying is fine, actually. He would laugh at himself if he could - aren't tears an actual luxury, after all? He wasn't able to cry his own tears with his own body before, but now he can.

There's a hand on his shoulder and Atem's heart drops into his stomach - oh no, now he's woken up - then another on the other side, then a tug, and Atem follows blindly. He's guided back to the bed and coaxed to sit down where a warm body presses against him and he's enveloped in an embrace.

Atem finds that he can't talk, he tries to draw breath to get the words out but sobs are the only thing he can produce and finally, he hears a voice call his name. It's so soft and warm and loving that Atem somehow feels worse and buries his head into Yuugi’s shoulder, his chest heaving and he almost wails from the struggle of it.

“Shh, other me. Cry it out. It helps. I know.”

He listens to Yuugi and does just that. It’s not easy to give up the reins but with Yuugi by his side, he finds the will to allow himself to succumb. He clutches his partner's shirt, holds him and is held in return, and lets himself cry. Lets his tears come like he's never done before and faced with the force of them, he feels like there's no end to it.

But there is an end. After a period of time that feels like an eternity, his sobs subside, his tears slow down, and he feels like he can finally loosen his hold of Yuugi's shirt to let blood flow into his fingers again. His nose feels snotty and he's sure there's no dry spot left on his partner's clothes and somehow that thought makes him laugh.

“See? All better now,” Yuugi murmurs against his temple and presses his lips there. That sign of affection almost makes Atem's eyes well up but he squeezes them shut, refusing to start crying all over again. He feels drained and empty and he's pretty sure he should be ashamed. He had woken Yuugi up and made him comfort him without asking but all he can feel is gratitude. Gratitude and love and endless adoration.

“Aibou,” he sniffles, voice congested and raw. He means to thank him but his throat closes up, yet Yuugi seems to catch his meaning.

“No need,” the shorter of the two says and Atem can feel his smile against his skin, “it's okay. You're okay, we're okay, everything's okay.”

Atem wants to argue but finds no energy for it. And - as he thinks about it, he realises that Yuugi is right.

They're okay.

He wraps his arms properly around Yuugi and squeezes, sighing softly. His mind is comfortably quiet now and he presses his ear against Yuugi's chest, listening to the beat of his heart (his heart's heart?) and feeling his own fall smoothly into the same rhythm. It's natural, it's right.

“I think,” he manages to croak out, “that we need to talk.”

Yuugi holds him closer and nods before pressing his face into Atem’s hair.

“Yeah,” he replies, sounding relieved, “we sure do, other me.”

#ygo dm #yugioh #puzzleshipping #puzzlespace #puzzlejune2021 #puzzlejune #puzzlequiet #atem #yuugi #tervdraws #tervdrabbles #fanart #fanfic #this bad boy can fit so many headcanons and projection in it #i am in the possession of the crybaby beam and i'm not afraid to use it (for real though. my agenda is to Normalize Boys Crying)#(no i will not be taking criticism)

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xseaxwitchxkpop · 3 years

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Most to Least Likely to...

Ateez members most to least likely to date a chubby/plus size individual!

Disclaimer: If I remember correctly, the Ateez members said they don’t care what their S/O looks like, it’s all about personality, so I don’t think they would really care about one’s weight. However, everyone on earth does have a “preference” (for lack of a better word) and is why I’m doing this. As a fat person, one learns to pick up on certain ~vibes~ for physical attraction. Remember, as long as you are healthy, whatever that means to you, and doing your best, that’s all that counts! I also don’t know any of the ateezers irl so this is just assumptions based on personalities they’ve shown us, what they’ve stated, and their ~vibes~.

Requested: Nope

Most

Yunho

San

Seonghwa

Yeosang

Hongjoong

Mingi

Jongho

Wooyoung

Least

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Justifications under the cut!

Yunho: I have to agree with the tumblr atiny that he is the #1 person in Ateez to go for a thicker S/O. IDK if he said something about it and I missed it and that’s why there’s such unanimous agreement, but anyway... His vibes are definitely in this category and I’m willing to bet that part of the reason is because he loves cuddles a lot (see: him and san at every fansign ever). I think he might prefer a thicker S/O because they might feel better to carry in general. Not to put down my skinny/thinner friends, but I’ve seen that tall and well-built men of any ethnicity/race tend to go for chunkier S/Os (at least women-attracted men) and I don’t think Yunho would be any different in this regard...also more squish during sexual activities which I feel like he would like.

San: This absolute baby boy! He’s emphasized multiple times that he basically doesn’t give a shit about looks and it’s all personality but I feel like his vibes are definitely leaning more towards a thicker S/O and in my experience those who have thicker S/Os tend to push the “looks don’t matter” agenda with complete seriousness the way he does. Anyway, he’s also on the skinny side in general (see: pre-debut photos) and probably eats a lot to keep up with his cheeta-like metabolism (see: him excited that he got “fat” probably meaning he might’ve been underweight prior to entering Ateez and many underweight people are that way because they have trouble putting on weight). I feel that he would prefer to have an S/O who’s not afraid to eat, (tends to be chunkier people, source: am chunky person and other social media creators), absolutely loves cuddling anybody and anything (see: him with any of the members at any time), and he plays a lot of video games so dare I say: it is the skinny, nerdy, gamer boys that like thicker women and I would extend this thinking to liking thicker men as well...just t h i c k people in general of all gender identities. (He’s a secret, not-so-secret nerd, fight me.) I also feel he would rather wear your sweater and steal your clothes than the other way around, but that’s just me. Finally, chunkier = his personal heater in the winter lol considering he is on the skinnier side.

Seonghwa: Look me in the eye and tell me this soft man who loves his plushies and takes care of the members would reject a thicker S/O. I’m not falling into stereotypes here because I feel this man’s vibes for his preferred personality (it ain’t mine lmao) but more than likely wants someone he can care for and what better way than food? I know he’s certainly not the cook of the group, but he l o v e s eating food the way all the members do so he also needs someone that has an appetite like he does. Also, plushies = soft, squishy, good for cuddles; chunkier S/O = soft, squishy, good for cuddles. He’s another one that would want to steal your clothes and wear them lol and because he is part of the gentle giants club in Ateez, he’d be hard-pressed to find an S/O taller than him that is woman-identifying, if that’s who he’s attracted to.

Yeosang: Dear Yeosang, the group’s baby. He’s a bit harder to pin down in terms of which body type he leans towards more, thinner or chunkier, so in general he probably genuinely doesn’t care. You’re thinner than him? He can wrap himself around you and engulf you. You’re thicker than him? He’ll curl into you like a cat and wrap y’all in a blanket burrito. Point being. he’s gonna be all over you because he has so much love to give in general. However, considering he is the second strongest in Ateez, he might go for a chunkier S/O just to motivate him to work out more and to make sure you know you can thrown around like a thinner individual. All in all, I genuinely don’t think he has a preference like the others might.

Hongjoong: Our charismatic leader is the very definition of not giving a shit. I just get “your personality is either compatible with mine or it’s not” vibes and unless he’s simply hooking up with someone, I don’t think looks are much a factor in his decision to pursue a relationship with someone. This is not to say the other members are shallow or anything because they really aren’t, but there are few people in this world that don’t have a body preference and I feel like our leader falls into that category -- the same way he stated that he doesn’t care about physical looks when deciding if he wants a friendship with someone. So long as your personality is compatible with his, his body preference will be whatever your body type is.

Mingi: Princess Mingi! He’s such a sweetheart. Anyway, he’s near the bottom of the list because while he probably doesn’t care too much, I feel like he would pursue someone with a thinner body type. He feel like he would love to pick up his S/O at any time and have them be light as a feather to easily spin around (not saying bigger bodies can’t do this...but you know what I mean). I feel like he would also love giving them piggyback rides and pampering them in ways that he might not give a thicker body a second glance. He has muscles and works out, don’t get me wrong, but his vibes tell me that he would probably pursue a thinner S/O just because.

Jongho: Listen, I love our magnae/maknae, but he’s towards the bottom for similar reasons to Mingi. Additionally, I feel that Jongho would want to feel like the protector (tm) in the relationship and have someone “complimentary” to him, at least aesthetically. To achieve this, though, he would probably go for a thinner body type despite being, arguably, the strongest in Ateez and that might make some people inclined to say that he might actually go for thicker instead of thinner but I say nay.

Wooyoung: Arguably the brattiest and loudest in Ateez! Now don’t come for me for this one, but I get the vibes that Wooyoung may not want a chunkier S/O. Hear me out! He doesn’t seem the type to engage in body shaming in any way, especially because he knows what it’s like to be body shamed. However, I don’t think he would want to date someone who is thicker just because he dropped a lot of weight because he didn’t like the way he looked -- which was thicker than he is now. I think he just would subconsciously try to get a chunkier S/O to work out with him to “lose the weight” as many people actually do when courting/dating a thicker S/O and that’s gonna cause a rift between him and his S/O if the S/O doesn’t want to lose the weight (because, unless it is endangering one’s health, one doesn’t need to). Yes, he is the chef of the group and would probably want to cook a lot for his S/O, but that S/O would probably have to have a cheeta-like metabolism or just not eat much of his cooking. I know that many people think that “just because someone thinks [x] about themselves doesn’t mean they think [x] about you” and that is some BS. I could be wrong and be surprised if he prefers a chunkier body type, but I have a hard time reading those vibes.

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This post is not meant to body shame anyone or make anyone feel bad about themselves, just my thoughts about the ateezers as I am a fat person and have picked up on ~fat vibes~ in attraction. Again, I do not know any of Ateez personally and I could have very well missed something any of them said about their attraction to someone (if so pls tell me lol I’m not up to date with everything in the fandom).

#ateez #yunho #san #seonghwa #yeosang #hongjoong #mingi #jongho #wooyoung #kpop imagine #ateez mtl #chubby!reader #fat!reader #plussize!reader #ateez x reader #sfw #not requested #mtl

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sfb123 · 3 years

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Sapere Aude - Part 11

Book: The Royal Heir

Pairing: King Liam Rys x Queen Riley Brooks

All characters belong to Pixelberry.

Catch Up Here

Series Description: I developed a theory of what I think will happen in TRH Book 4, and I was encouraged by some very lovely people to turn my theory into a fic, so here it is. Basically, Riley is recruited to join the Via Imperii, this series will follow her as she joins them to try and bring them down from the inside, and all of the drama and bombshells she learns along the way. Sapere Aude is Latin for “dare to know” it seemed like an appropriate title.

Rating: PG-13 Adult language, discussions of death, conspiracy, blackmail, and other adult themes.

Warning: The Royal Heir Book 3 Spoilers all over the place.

Disclaimer: I have no current affiliation with any other Via Imperii themed stories. Any claims that I have pre-read anything are false.

Word Count: 2,909

A/N: First of all, I have a couple of new readers (hi, thank you, I love you) if this is your first Sapere Aude, stop here, go back, and start from the beginning. This series has a lot of bombs and surprises, so none of this is going to make sense, and it’s going to make it less exciting if you aren’t reading from the beginning.

Sorry, another long wait for a chapter. I got stuck, and distracted, and like a million other things. The Choices Insider email last week kind of lit a fire under me. When I started writing this (in December) the plan was to have it finished before the last book came out, so I have like a month to get through this. I’m going full out on getting this completed now, I will be working on nothing but this until it is done, and am hoping to finish it in time for the next book to come out so that PB has plenty of time to steal my ideas.

This chapter took a while for me to work through, but @jessiembruno was amazing and helped me every step of the way, and got like a million rambling text messages from me once the idea dam finally broke. And then pre-reading and leaving me some amazing love notes, and super helpful suggestions. She also kept encouraging me, and pushing me to work on it when my mind would wander into new ideas, or thoughts on some other random WIP that I started throwing together. I love you, and I am so grateful for this friendship that goes way beyond any of this. By the way, you are an AMAZING writer, and I will continue to shout it from the mountain tops as long as I live.

As always with this series, I need to thank @txemrn for pre-reading. I was having SUCH a miserable day and feeling so shitty about myself (for non-fandom reasons), and your reactions to this chapter made me laugh out loud for the first time in what felt like forever. I appreciate you so much my dear friend.

And of course, thank you @twinkleallnight for my beautiful series moodboard.

Tags: Listed below, you know the drill.

Liam exited the bedroom and walked toward the sitting area. He paused at the end of the hallway to observe his wife and his daughter sitting on the couch. Riley had her blouse in hand, sewing on the button Olivia sent her for her undercover mission. She was showing Eleanor how to sew, talking her through every stitch. The princess was watching and listening intently, taking in every word her mother said.

He leaned his right shoulder against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest as he admired his family. He didn’t understand how it was possible to fall even more in love every time he looked at them. All he wanted in this world was their happiness and safety, and now here he was, sending his wife straight to the enemy.

“Hi Daddy!” The angelic voice of his daughter pulled him from his thoughts.

“Hi Princess. Are you being a good helper for mommy?” He lifted Eleanor off the couch and sat in her seat, placing her on his lap.

“Best helper a girl could ask for.” Riley held her hand out, palm up, and Eleanor gave her a high five.

Liam enjoyed the company of his family for a few more moments, before placing a kiss on his daughter’s cheek. “Alright Eleanor, why don’t you go play in your room for a little while? Mommy and daddy have to talk about grown up things.”

“Yes, daddy. Will you come play after?”

“Of course, I believe I am owed a tea party.” He gave her a hug before setting her down and watching her run to her room. When she was gone, he turned his attention back to Riley. “How are you feeling, love?”

Riley cut the lingering thread from the button and placed her blouse on the table in front of them before responding. “I mean, obviously I’m nervous, but I’m optimistic that I’ll come back with something we can use. How are you feeling?”

He sighed and pulled her close to him, kissing the top of her head as it landed on his chest. “Riley, I love how much you worry about me, but let me worry about you right now. Let me be your support system. Tell me truly, how are you feeling?”

“I’m...I’m terrified.” She pulled back and looked him in the eyes, tears beginning to pool in her own. “I’m trying so hard to be strong, to put on a brave face, but this is fucking terrifying. We don’t know how deep it goes, we know some of the people that are involved, but how do we know that that’s everyone?”

“You’re right, there are a lot of unknowns, and that’s scary.” He cupped her face in his hands, wiping a falling tear with his thumb. “But I truly believe that we are going to end this. That you are going to end this. Don’t forget, you are the Champion of The Realm.”

“Yeah, but I’m sleeping with the guy who makes those decisions, he may have been a little biased.” She shrugged, half joking.

Liam removed his hands, his expression becoming more serious. “Riley, that’s not funny. You have earned every single thing you have received since you arrived in this country, our country. I don’t ever want you to believe that my feelings for you overrule my judgement when it comes to your abilities. You are the strongest person I have ever met. If anyone can do this, it’s you.”

“IF anyone can do this. What if nobody can?”

“Then we will face the fallout together. Like we always do, like we always will. We are the King and Queen of Cordonia, Liam and Riley Rys. We are a force to be reckoned with.” He raised an eyebrow as he parroted back her reassuring words from a few nights before.

She smirked at him. “Hey, no fair, you can’t use my own words to prove your point like that.”

“Yes I can, old negotiation tactic.” He winked at her and stood from the couch reaching for her hand. “Come on, we still have the whole day ahead of us. Let’s go have a tea party with our daughter, then I’m taking my girls out for dinner.”

****

Two days later, Riley was sitting in the back of an SUV heading toward the Fierro Estate. She was doing her best to quell her nerves, but she couldn’t help her hands from fidgeting in her lap.

“You seem on edge, ma’am. Is everything ok?” The sound of Mara’s voice cut through the silence, startling Riley.

“Oh...yeah, I’m fine Mara. I’m just not really sure what to expect from this meeting. Last time I went to one of these events, I found out my mother in law wasn’t actually dead. I don’t know if I could handle another surprise like that.”

Mara chuckled at her concern. “Don’t worry your majesty, this is a simple strategy meeting followed by a dinner. You have met all of the members, so there will be no surprise guests this time around.”

Riley nodded and turned her head, watching the scenery pass by as they continued to their destination. Her mind was racing thinking about what this meeting would have in store. She practiced taking pictures with the pen, and activating the recorder she had sewn into her shirt. As they got closer to the estate, she felt her heart rate speed up, and the knot in her stomach tighten.

When they arrived, Riley was ushered into the grand room, which had been set up with a large table. The other members were standing around in small groups chatting until it was time for the meeting to begin. Riley fidgeted with the pen, twirling it in her fingers before lifting it to her face and tapping it against her chin and clicking it several times. She hoped it came off as a nervous habit, providing cover for the fact that she was actually taking pictures around the room.

She gasped and nearly jumped out of her skin at the feeling of a hand gently being placed on her shoulder. She whipped around to see Eleanor smiling softly at her. “Riley dear, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you.”

“Oh, Eleanor. Hello.” Riley held her hand to her chest, trying to get her heart rate back to normal. “It’s ok, I’m just a little nervous. Not really sure what to expect from this meeting.”

“Don’t worry, I promise it’s just regular business, nothing earth shattering. Come on, it’s time to get this started, and you’re sitting next to me.” Eleanor wrapped her arm around Riley and led her to the table. The other guests took this as their cue to follow, as the meeting was about to get underway. As Riley sat, she adjusted her skirt and blouse, using the opportunity to activate the microphone embedded in her button.

As the chapter president, Eleanor kicked off the meeting by greeting their newest member, Queen Riley, and explaining that she was there to help push their initiatives though with the King. Riley clenched her fist ever so slightly, a trick she used when she was trying to keep her expression neutral. They continued on, reviewing the minutes of the last meeting, it all seemed to be pretty mundane, things that wouldn't even necessarily cross hers or Liam’s desk.

Then they opened up the floor to new business, and Neville stood to address the room. “I would like to revisit the Auvernal alliance.”

Riley was able to maintain her stoic expression, but her body tensed at the mention of Auvernal. She and Liam had made it perfectly clear that there would be no alliance. “I don’t believe there is anything to revisit there.” She chimed in. “King Liam and I determined that the alliance would not be beneficial for Cordonia.”

“Actually, I believe you determined the alliance would not be beneficial to you and your husband.” Neville rebutted, crossing his arms over his chest. “You didn’t want to marry off your daughter, you didn’t bother thinking of what the alliance could bring to our country.”

“Are you questioning the decisions of your monarchs? I urge you to remember your station, Lord Neville.” Riley raised an eyebrow and stood a bit taller.

Neville scoffed at her threat. “And I urge you to remember that you may have slept your way to the top in Cordonia, but the Via Imperii is bigger than the monarchy, and in this society, I outrank you.”

“Well, if being the Queen doesn’t matter in this room, then there is nothing stopping me from coming over there and beating your a...”

“Ok ok ok, let’s all calm down here.” Eleanor grabbed Riley’s arm, stopping her from charging at Neville. “Let’s all sit down and have a rational conversation, weighing out the pros and cons of an alliance.” Riley and Neville both sat down and exchanged narrow glances. “Now Neville, since you have brought this proposal to the group, you will go first. Please explain to us your thought process on revisiting the alliance.”

Neville nodded and smirked at Riley. “It is clear that combining the financial security of Cordonia with the military strength of Auvernal would make us an unstoppable force. Besides, we need the extra protection given our country’s recent history.” He glared at Riley once again.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” Riley huffed.

“Look at the instability we have faced in recent years. Our crown prince abdicated, his successor, our current king, broke off a perfectly suitable engagement to marry a foreign commoner who was marred in scandal.”

“He released a statement that cleared that whole thing up. The scandal is irrelevant.” She could feel her cheeks heating up.

“Do you really think people stopped talking about it? You can’t really believe that it won’t be a part of your legacy as our Queen.”

Riley slouched down in her seat. She knew she should remain composed, but bringing up the Tariq scandal hit a nerve that she didn’t know still existed. One of her biggest concerns in continuing her relationship with Liam, and accepting his proposal, was that his success as King would be overshadowed by the scandal she had faced. She had thought that after all these years, it would have been forgotten, but Neville bringing it up just brought everything back up and made her realize it would be something that was attached to her name forever.

“Besides the personal problems our royal family has faced, there have been multiple attempts to overthrow them just within our own country. Sons of Earth, Duke Godfrey, Barthelemy Beaumont, just to name a few. Other countries are seeing this, and it won’t be long before they try to come for us as well.” Neville continued.

“While I don’t agree with his delivery, Lord Neville does make some valid points.” Emmeline interjected, the rest of the room began murmuring in agreement. Riley couldn’t hide her shocked expression as she felt tears start to build up in her eyes. She blinked them away, she was not going to give them the satisfaction of seeing their queen cry.

Eleanor took back control of the room before turning to Riley. “Riley, would you like to counter? You and Liam worked directly with Auvernal during the marriage alliance talks, you clearly have some insight that we may not be privy to.”

Riley took a deep breath to get her emotions under control before standing to address the room. “Aside from the fact that Bradshaw and Isabella are deplorable people with hell spawn children, the main reason that we decided an alliance was not in the best interest of Cordonia, was because it was clear that their interest was not an alliance, but a hostile takeover of our country.”

“Perhaps we would prosper under their rule. I haven’t heard of any coup attempts in Auvernal, it seems to me like they’re doing something right.” Neville spoke up.

“So that’s it then? You all think Bradshaw and Isabella would do a better job as your king and queen, so I’m just supposed to convince Liam to relinquish the throne?” Riley threw her hands up in frustration and stepped away from the table.

“Your majesty, we’re not making the final decision right here, right now, we just want to remain open to the idea and explore some options.” Emmeline tried to talk Riley down. “Perhaps you and King Liam could take a meeting with them, a friendly lunch maybe, just to open the lines of communication.”

“This is ridiculous. I can’t believe you all expect me to agree with this!” Riley was now pacing the room, overcome with a nervous energy.

Eleanor stood and lifted a hand to quiet the room. “Alright, that’s enough. I think we’ve gotten as far as we’re going to get with this conversation tonight. Dinner is being set out in the dining hall. I suggest we adjourn for the day. Let’s all compose ourselves and think about all sides of this conversation. We will pick up the conversation at the next meeting.”

As the members started filing out of the room, Eleanor approached Riley and gently placed her hand on her arm to keep her still. “Are you alright Riley?”

Riley shrugged Eleanor’s hand off of her, anger clear on her face. “Of course I’m not alright. I basically just had a room full of my subjects telling me that my husband and I are doing a shitty job, and they think those monsters are better suited to look out for their best interests. Of course I’m not fucking alright!” Riley moves in closer, lowering her voice but not losing any of the anger in her tone. “I thought you were here doing this to protect Liam. Do you really think that this is protecting him? Handing his kingdom over to Auvernal?!”

“Riley, I always have Liam’s best interests at heart, I promise you that. Why don’t you head home, take a couple of days to relax and take everything in. I will set up a meeting for you and I later this week to talk about everything and work out a game plan.”

“Fine, I can’t stay here anymore anyway. And I definitely don’t have an appetite for dinner.” Riley walked out of the room, looking for Mara so that they could get back to the palace. She stepped into the dining area and saw Mara standing in the far corner talking to Neville. She clenched her jaw and took a deep breath before approaching the pair. “Mara, we will not be staying for dinner. We are returning to the palace immediately. I want to be home to put my daughter to bed.” She wasn’t going to give Neville the satisfaction of knowing she was leaving because of what he started.

“Of course, your majesty.” Mara nodded and exited with Riley.

The ride home was silent. In all the years that Mara had worked for Riley, she had never seen her this upset. She wasn’t entirely sure how to handle it, or what would be considered overstepping her duties, so she decided to stay quiet and let Riley speak, if she wanted to. She didn’t.

They arrived at the palace and walked together to the royal quarters. As Riley placed her hand on the doorknob to enter, Mara cleared her throat to get her attention. “Your majesty, I know this was a difficult evening for you, but I do feel I need to remind you that discretion is key in the Via Imperii. His majesty cannot know what happened tonight. You will need to lock those feelings away for the time being.”

Riley pressed her lips into a thin line and nodded. She knew she was going to fall into Liam's arms and cry the second she saw him, and then she would tell him everything, but she couldn’t let Mara know that. “Liam and I will be staying in for the rest of the night. You are dismissed for the evening.” Riley walked into her quarters and shut the door before Mara had a chance to respond.

As soon as she closed the door, she leaned back against it and dropped her head into her hands. Liam came walking into the room, the smile that appeared on his face when he heard the front door open quickly faded as he took in the sight of his wife sobbing at the front door. “Riley?” She looked up at him, tears streaming down her face as she tried to catch her breath. He rushed over to her and pulled her close, she buried her head in his chest as he stroked her hair and kissed the top of her head trying unsuccessfully to soothe her. “Shhhh, it’s alright love, I’m right here, I’ve got you. Tell me what happened.”

Riley could barely speak, but she slowly tried to explain everything that had happened that night. Liam walked her to the couch as she spoke, she needed to sit, anything to help her relax and calm down. He stared at her in disbelief as he listened to his wife tearfully recap her evening.

On the other side of the door, Mara pulled her phone out of her jacket pocket, selecting one of the contacts and bringing the phone to her ear. “My lord, you were right. We will need to put your plan in motion.”

Permatag:

@anjanettexcordonia @athena-penrose @bbrandy2002 @chemist-ana @choicesficwriterscreations @choiceskatie @cordonia-gothqueen @cordoniaqueensworld @emkay512 @gabesmommie1130 @gkittylove99 @hopelessromanticmonie @iaminlovewithtrr @jessiembruno @kat-tia801 @khoicesbyk @kingliam2019 @lucy-268 @marshmallowsaremyfavorite @mile9213 @mom2000aggie @pixie88 @queenrileyrose @secretaryunpaid @sweatyrysconnoisseur @tessa-liam @theroyalheirshadowhunter @twinkleallnight @txemrn

Sapere Aude:

@burnsoslow @busywoman @gardeningourmet @ofpixelsandscribbles

Liam x Riley:

@jared2612

Liam:

@amandablink @yourmajesty09

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soultek · 3 years

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An deiner Seite - Marco Bodt x Reader (Attack on Titan)

Author’s Note: Well! Welcome to my first piece of Attack on Titan writing!

Of course it’s Marco. Bertolt and Reiner are my favourites so of course it’s Marco who I get the idea to write for.

Maybe because my ideas for Bert and Reiner are so messy

I digress. Let’s retcon a certain something for my (and Jean’s) sunshine ☀️

I’m *this* close to the possibility of a series but we’ll see...

Disclaimer: AoT/SnK and all associated characters not mine / I’m certainly not that hot at writing action, but I gave it my best shot / tried to keep reader as gender neutral as possible

Premise: When you find Marco in the clutches of a Titan, you have but one thought. Not him, not today, not ever.

Words: 3270

Warnings: Potential spoilers for Marco’s death depending on how much of the show you have/n’t seen

______

Screaming filled the air of the quietened district of Trost once more. It was supposed to be over. Nearly over. Eren was certainly stealing all the attention in his Titan form, despite the presence of other Titans still in the area. Ignoring them to marvel at the new ‘Secret Weapon’ proved to be a fatal mistake.

Nearly fatal. The scream that pierced your ears made your blood run cold and you turned on a dime; this was not a time for thinking. It was a time for pure instinct. Of the 104th Cadets you weren’t anything other than good; good at everything but never really excelling in anything. You hadn’t made the top 10 cut, but that didn’t really matter to you. You weren’t aiming for the Military Police as so many of your friends were. But you were quick on your feet – which had been quite the saving grace in this battle already, and you were almost as much of a specialist with your ODM gear as Jean Kirstein. You didn’t need to check your canisters before launching yourself from the roof as you sprinted – you could make it, you had to make it. Even if you consumed all your gas in the process.

Your gear rocketed you through the air towards the Titan and you swallowed back your fear, your hatred – nearly emotionless as you arced yourself, running your blades parallel to make the cut. No time to think about the consequences of not getting there in time. The consequences of not cutting deep enough. You turned your body into your slice and let gravity do the rest of your work as you expended more gas to propel yourself – you didn’t even have time to go for the nape. Oh no, you’d have to slice through skin and muscle and bone; or else risk crushing him in the process of killing it. You would never forgive yourself for coming so close only to end up the cause of the very thing you were trying to prevent.

The Titan’s fingers seemed like the easiest option so that’s where you went, and with all your calculated factors your cuts were successful even if not entirely clean. You hardly cared about that – there was something else on your mind, dropping a blade from your hand in time to snatch the cadet from its clutches. Not today. Not him. If you had your way, not EVER. Your wires slacked as you overshot the building you’d grappled into and both you and Marco slammed hard into the roof tiles, skittering across them. Digging your heels in, you retracted your gear and discarding your now trashed blades, you clicked fresh ones into place. Even now, no time to think. Marco – still slightly dazed and definitely hurting – managed to lift his body up shakily on his arms from his sprawled position to at least see who his saviour was. You? He smiled despite it all; of course! “Stay here.” You growled, and Marco barely had time to get out a ‘huh!?’ as you pushed yourself into another sprint. Steam may have been rising from the Titan’s severed fingers, but it was still staring at you both – you channelled all your hate this time as you released your grapples into the building opposite. This time you didn’t have to be so calculated; this time it didn’t matter as long as you killed it. Marco was safe now. If you’d been even one second later… “NOT MY BOYFRIEND, YOU SON OF A BITCH-!” You hollered, hurling yourself at the Titan. Reckless maybe, but in your eyes necessary. You swung yourself out in the opposite direction to where your gear had set, narrowly missing what was left of the Titan’s hand as it lunged for you. And as your feet left the rooftop the iron cables wrapped themselves around the Titan’s neck, straining. You could feel the tiny smirk on your face as you reeled yourself in, blades once again in perfect positioning for your final strike. It was a shame you couldn’t make it suffer any more than this. But you could dwell on that later. Your cut was clean, perhaps even deeper than necessary, as you felt the snap of bone under your blades again. Neither were intact as you landed back on the tiles, a little harder than you would have liked, considering the way your body jarred for just a second. Grapples retracted, you once again relieved yourself of broken blades. But not before kissing one – hardly caring about the amount of Titan blood on them, or you, now becoming that same vapour. Thank you, for helping me save him… You brushed yourself down, and stored your equipment. You could already feel yourself shaking, adrenaline spent. Taking a deep breath, you allowed yourself to think for a moment how close to death he’d just been, how you’d just thrown yourself in harms way to save his life. You would do anything for Marco Bodt. That’s just how it was. Certainly wouldn’t have gained me any points with Shadis though… Pushing your feet on in urgency, you skidded across the tiles to your ‘damsel in distress’. By now Marco had managed to ease himself to standing, despite clutching his right arm – you guessed that meant he wasn’t hurt so bad, thank the Walls for that. His eyes were beholding you with a sense of wonder, but you could see the horror behind them – Marco knew what would have happened had you not swooped in. You supposed brushes with death would not be so easy to overcome. “Geez, Marco! Jean and I were so worried-!” Somehow these were the first words that made their way out of your mouth, maybe they were the only ones you could say safely right now. Well, actually, you didn’t know if Jean was worried. You didn’t even know if Jean had heard the same thing you had or even where he was - but you knew he’d be pissed once he found out. You stopped in front of him, scariness of the situation suddenly hitting you full force, you felt the lump in your throat before tears brimmed. Although they didn’t fall. You didn’t need to bother him with that right now – Marco needed you. “Don’t ever do that to me again!” You weren’t sure why your instant reaction was to be mad at him – but then you weren’t mad at him, you were mad at the circumstances. That a Titan had even gone for Marco - had been given the opportunity to do so. That he’d had to go through that. If you’d been with him in the first place… No use crying over not being put in squad 19 now.

Marco’s attempt to calm you was valiant, and the fearful look in his eyes almost dissipated as he smiled, despite it still being present in his voice. “I- I know… I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to worry either of you…” How could you stay mad at that smile? Those pretty brown eyes? The constellation of freckles that painted his cheeks you just loved so damn much. You gave him a slight smile back, almost by way of apology for yelling… or acceptance of his own. Marco knew it was only because you were so alarmed, your emotions were allowed to get the better of you in situations like this. Your eyes left his to scan his body for any other signs of injury besides the arm; maybe he was trying to keep his weight to one side, maybe he was bleeding somewhere. You’d be forcing him to medical anyway, if Jean didn’t drag him there himself – but you wanted to figure out how urgent it should be… You paused, eyes flying wide in shock once more. “Where’s your ODM gear!?” You took a step back; how had you not noticed!? The pause of significance had you darting your gaze back to his face and for a few seconds Marco looked absent, a flicker as if he’d just seen a ghost. Before he swallowed hard, giving an embarrassed laugh and rubbing the back of his neck. “Oh, I-! I lost it.” You reacted too quickly to what he had said to realise a decision had been made leading to that response; “LOST IT! Babe you almost got eaten!” You grabbed Marco’s hands in yours, squeezing them tight, half to make sure he was really still here, alive and breathing, and half to try to get him to realise the seriousness of the situation. “It wouldn’t have mattered! I was out of gas, I thought I could out run them!” “Over rooftops!? Marco, they’re 15 meters high-!” You didn’t really remember him being outstanding at parkour. Marco was quick, nearly as quick as you, but you would reckon anyone would have struggled with a strategy like that. Even Humanities Strongest… “I know, I know, I’m sorry.” Marco found himself apologising once more as he laced your fingers together. His hands were so warm; you weren’t sure if that was just because you were hyperfocusing on his touch right now, or radiated heat from the death grip of a Titan. You could have lost this… Anywhere else in Trost, a little less skill… you could have lost this… Your boyfriend cleared his throat to perhaps offer better explanation. “But I thought the lack of gear would make me lighter, y’know?” His clarification made sense, but it was still suicide. Had he not thought about his best friend? Had he not thought about you? No, Marco would only have thought about you both – overconfident determination was not his thing. Did this make sense? Could it have made anything other than sense… people did crazy things in battle, in the heat of the moment even the coolest of heads could make rash decisions like that. Even Marco could – hadn’t you just done something comparably insane? Your face pulled back into a look of distress and you chewed your bottom lip for a second to stop yourself tearing up again. “You scared me!” You were glad that your tone wasn’t so much chiding, but that wasn’t about to stop Marco’s expression screwing up in concern. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” There he was apologising all over again, this time with a wince to accompany his nervous smile, hands detaching from yours to be held up defensively. You took this opportunity to really look at him and you gasped gently at the slight redness to his eyes, the tear stains running through the speckles of dust on his cheeks. You tried to ignore that in this light you could see where his crying had dampened his shirt too. You were forgetting which one of you had just been saved from hell. Marco didn’t deserve to be subject to your anger at the world, he needed the exact opposite. Your expression softened and you reached out, holding his face gently in your hands, you ran your thumbs through the subtle marks to rid Marco of them. You don’t need to cry now, I’m here… It’s going to be okay. At your movement Marco couldn’t help but give you his best lopsided smile; as good as he could when he was still shaken up. You giggled, “Aw! How could I not forgive such a cute face-?” Removing your hands from his cheeks you wound your arms around him and pulled your body into his, head against his chest. Marco’s whole body was just as warm; you wondered once more about the Titan’s hold on him – you knew they ran particularly high body temperatures. Closing your eyes for a second as you melted into his embrace, you focused on his heartbeat; Marco was calming now, but that was all the proof you needed that he was still here with you and breathing. You’d both lived to fight another day. But taking back Trost had only taught you how human you were; how easy you could be taken from each other. You enveloped him a little tighter at your own thought: No. You couldn’t allow yourself to believe it would be easy – you would fight to the death for him. And you knew how protective Marco could get.

You couldn’t help but beam, inhaling him – allowing yourself to be caught in his familiarity for just a moment. The Titans that needed taking down after Eren had sealed the breach could wait for just a second longer. And yet, with Marco in the state he was in without his gear, you got the feeling there was only one way you could go. “Guess I gotta haul you back home now, huh-!?” You reluctantly pulled away from his chest, looking back up into those beautiful eyes. Pink dusted his cheeks slightly, only making you smile wider. Marco’s blush coupled with his freckles was a different kind of adorable all together. His laugh was genuine, and you were glad he was happy. It didn’t seem to take much to get your Marco back. “Haha, guess you get to be my knight in shining armour huh? And I certainly don’t mind that!” He grinned and you smirked gently; “Or-- I can suit you up... and you can carry me home? We can swap gear over and you can sweep me off my feet, my handsome prince.” His blush was already deepening but Marco was a goner as soon as you added the wink. And the cute collection of freckles really did stand out against the red; you couldn’t help but giggle in happiness. But Marco took a breath, and this time he grinned; besides it would take a little while to take the ODM gear from you and put it on him, and right now he’d rather be out of the reach of Titans, for obvious reasons. “No, no, people should get to know you saved my life-”

Marco suddenly stiffened as his gaze wandered to just over your shoulder, you watched his eyes grow wide and there was that flicker again. His grip on you tightened just a little, and your hand fell to your blades instinctively as you turned to see what has caused his mood change. A few roof tops away from the two of you, and on slightly higher ground, stood your group of friends; Annie, Reiner and Bertholdt. (Well, you kicked around with the guys a lot at least.) You tipped your head watching them, eyebrow quirked, half raising the hand that had shot to your blades in greeting. Their expressions were all unreadable, Reiner was the only one who attempted to return your salutation. “Where the heck were they!?” An aside said out loud. Not that you minded saving Marco all by yourself, but help would always have been appreciated. You turned away from them and back to your boyfriend, whose expression was now worn a little more neutral. His grip on you was not. “Babe, what’s wrong?” “It’s- it’s nothing...” Marco blinked hard and when his eyes returned to you, he immediately softened, with a smile, “Let’s get out of here.” “Okay, Sunshine. Your call!” You gave a nod, grinning, before stepping to his side, looping your arm around his waist as Marco secured his own around your shoulders. Leaning across, you brushed your lips to his cheek gently, thankful he was still with you. All these little things suddenly seemed so huge with renewed context… “You sure you’ll be okay?” “I’ll be fine, if there’s anyone that can get you out of here it’s me and Jean, right?” You teased, gently rapping the knuckles of your free hand against the gas cylinders. Despite knowing you’d used a lot to get to him, you knew you’d be fine taking Marco back too. You smiled; things were on your side today. You all needed to catch a break, and you supposed there was no better time than today. “Thank God I happen to be in with the two ODM specialists of the class!” “Speaking of, he’s probably wandering where the heck we are.” “…Better not leave him hanging.” Marco’s voice was at least amused, as you made sure everything was secure. You had to confirm you weren’t about to lose your own ODM gear trying to get him back to the safety of the wall. “Alright, let’s get you home and dry!” Marco gave a confident nod to match the smile on his face and gripped you a little tighter. You glanced back to the other roof top, but by now the other three had disappeared. You frowned, still a little puzzled by Marco’s reaction, but brushed it off to focus on the task ahead of you. Neither of you needed a count down and pushed off at the same time, running to the edge of the roof so your ODM gear needed to do the minimal amount of work, before you both jumped, laughing as you loosed your grapples into the nearest tall building surface. You had to admit to yourself, you loved how tight Marco was hanging onto you and couldn’t help but notice how his smile grew as you carried him towards the safety of the wall. You held him a little closer too. Today would hit you hard, maybe later, when you’d all calmed down and reality settled in the dead of night. You hoped it wouldn’t come to you in dreams… But you supposed you would find out. You glanced to the ground below, the structures around you, Marco was doing the same and you knew you were both looking for the same person; Jean. The first thing you would do was reunite, regroup and recount… and then would come the big decision. Where the three of you would go, having all just graduated. If decisions would change, now you’d been through hell and back. Marco took your hand, lacing your fingers as you landed back within Wall Rose and the military camp set up – all quiet here, not a Titan to be seen. You squeezed his hand hard in response as you both scanned the movements of people, trying not to get disheartened at how many weren’t there. You didn’t even allow the possibility that Jean was one of them to cross your mind. “GUYS---!” Both of you gasped, turning towards the voice, “GUYS! OH, THANK GOD---!!” Jean waved his arms through the air as he raced towards you both. “JEAN!” You yelled in unison, taking off towards your best friend and practically throwing yourselves at him. Jean Kirstein staggered and you all fell with a thump to the floor, laughing, “Okay, geez, I get it you missed me! I’d miss me too!” He cracked a smile, arms around you both. Marco and yourself shared a look, quietly agreeing that you’d tell Jean what happened later. Right now was a time to be relieved that your trio had made it out of Trost alive. Survived one more day. You both threw your arms back around him and hugged each other close. You closed your eyes tight, enjoying the sound of both of them laughing into the air. You were all still just kids; this was how it was meant to be, right? Having fun and messing around and not having to worry about friends you’d lost, or the monsters outside the walls… You smiled to yourself; maybe one day you’d get that all back.

I’m glad you’re safe… Oh boys, I’m so glad you’re safe… Thank God… that you’re alive… I don’t know how to thank anyone enough for this… I don’t know what I’d do… if you had gone…

---

Thank you very much for reading! 😘❤

#Happy Birthday & Marco Retcon To Me!#Marco Bodt #attack on titan #SnK #Marco Bott #shingeki no kyojin #if you squint very hard there's possibly some JeanMarco / Poly relationship stuff in here.#I think it sets up for a very interesting series proposal and I got some ideas of how I'd do it...#Like the Scouting mission I know how that goes.#I guess I'm figuring this out right now. This is like the toe dip into providing content for this fandom so....#Let me know how I'm doing!#Marco Bott x Reader #Marco Bodt x Reader

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silma-words · 3 years

Note

Another prompt for Adrian and MC...

Number 5 / "say please"

not sure how you want to take this one, but I thought the smut could be next level... have fun! 😂

N/A: Omg I cannot thank you enough for this prompt @mssukeyna! This was so much fun, and a great prompt to push me a little out of my comfort zone! I literally woke up 2h earlier every day so that I could write more before work ;) I hope you’ll like it!

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Choices: Bloodbound

Pairing: Adrian Raines x MC (Ellie)

Rating: Explicit (NSFW, 18+)

Genre: Smut.Smut.Smut

AU Chronology: Bloodbound AU (after book 1 – the events of book 2 never happened) – ‘Inevitable - Arc I: Before we part’ (Masterlist)

Summary: “We are travelling for business, Ellie, we’ll have to behave like professionals”, he had warned her, although he did not look so convinced about it himself….

Inspired by the following nsfw-prompts: #5. for sex in public / “say please”

Words: 4200

**Disclaimer: Characters and background plot are the property of Pixelberry.**

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Down to business (Part I?)

Getting to travel was one of the perks Ellie enjoyed the most about her job as the CEO’s personal assistant. She never really had any opportunity to get out of her small town before she moved to NYC, and had always been of a curious nature. This job was a dream come true on that matter. But some trips were better than others. The ones that revolved around business negotiations, although exciting in their own ways, were not her favourites. By far, the ones she preferred were the ones that were meant for networking, for Adrian to maintain his relationships with previous business partners. There had not been many of those since she had started working at Raines Corp. but she loved those very much. These business trips revolved mostly around socializing. And socializing was one of her strengths.

But the reason she liked these trips the most was not because of the fancy dinner parties, the pricey hotels, or the designer dresses she got to wear to play the part. No. What she liked the most were the times she could have to herself in between social events, to explore around and satiate her curiosity about ‘the rest of the world’, and the times when she could get Adrian all to herself. He was more relaxed during these trips. More light hearted. More playful. As well as more tuned to her cues than when they were travelling for more serious business. And that, she loved to play around with. A lot.

Adrian was always doing his best to keep up the façade of the boss-assistant interactions between them when they were in public. And she completely understood why. Truly. But that was also so tempting for her to do her best to weave her way through that invisible barrier he was tentatively setting between them.

She would brush his fingers when he would hand her a drink. Sneak a hand up his thigh under the table at dinner. Fiddle with her long strands of hair to attract his attention to her neckline. Oh, his poker face was good. Spot on. Decades of practice truly paying off. But whenever she played her cards well, she could see that façade slowly crumble down. His cheeks slightly changing colour as she would whisper sweet - well maybe not so sweet - nothings to his ear. His Adam’s apple moving slightly at the sight of her legs shifting as she would change position on her seat, her skin exposed through the slit of her dress. His speech suddenly stammering slightly as she would slowly caress the inside of his calf with her foot, whenever she had been sitting across from him at dinner and had felt bold enough to risk reaching blindly under the cover of the table cloth.

She always made sure to keep her face composed so that the other guests would not notice how Adrian’s reactions were directly connected to her. But she would also cast him a challenging look as soon as the moment had passed, to make it perfectly clear that the game was on. And never once had she received back any kind of response that would indicate that Adrian was not on board with this. He might play the game by pretending that this behaviour was totally unprofessional, but they both knew that Adrian had never been anyone who cared much about the rules.

This time, their ‘socialising trip’ had led them further from home than ever before. Ellie was finally given the chance to fly out of the country and get a glimpse at Europe, with their first stops leaving her in awe at the wonders of the Italian countryside where they had stayed for five days to catch up with a couple of Adrian’s old ‘friends’ who had chosen to retire there. She did enjoy the socializing parts way more than she had anticipated: who would have dared to complain about the exquisite cuisine, the tours of the vineyards, the breath-taking views over lakes and mountains, and the luxurious guestrooms they could discreetly retreat to when the schmoozing was getting boring and the yearning had become too much.

The last part of their ten-days trip had also reached beyond of her expectations: she had always dreamt of discovering France, and although their journey would not grant her her secret wish of seeing Paris, she found out that the luxurious hills and valleys of the South-West of France were as equally magnificent as what she had seen so far over the last few days. There was so much history around, old medieval castles and ancient caves that she wished she could explore, that her curiosity and excitement seemed to be only matched by Adrian’s nerdy enthusiasm. European history was not necessarily his strongest suit, but he did know quite a few things about it, and gladly shared with her his knowledge about the places they travelled through. His expertise on French wines was definitely spot on though. And kind of sexy too.

Their guest was – unsurprisingly – a wealthy investor who had inherited a prosperous estate from his great-grandfather who was, originally, the business partner Adrian had been trading with at the beginning of the twentieth-century. Pretending to be his own descendant was apparently something Adrian was quite used to. Even though their current host – Emile – was pretty obnoxious.

They dined, visited local investors, attended a couple of art exhibitions grand opening nights. And indulged on wine, local delicacies, and smouldering gazes in between polite handshakes and casual conversations. Ellie’s French was not really up to the challenge when other guests could not speak English, but luckily Adrian was doing quite well in that department – another sexy trait to add to that very long list that Ellie kept filling up in her head.

That night, their host had been planning a special treat for his guests – Adrian and Ellie among a larger group of about thirty: a tour of his private ‘art collection’, followed by a fancy garden-party on his estate. Ellie had been looking forward to it, until the tour had started and she had realised that most of these ‘pieces of art’ were actually ancient remains that Emile had bought from lucky ‘discoverers’ around the world and snatched from the hands of archaeologists and museums to fill up his own little private gallery. As the tour was going on, she kept grumbling by Adrian’s side, drawing the attention of a few other guests that were marvelling at these stolen relics and obviously did not care much about how these had been acquired. As the group proceeded to move on to the next room, Adrian discreetly motioned her to move aside and slow her pace, grinning at her once they had managed to place themselves at the tail of the touring group.

“I know this is grating you, but this is quite a common thing these days – there is no point sulking about it now while there is not much we can do about it”.

“You’re the one to talk, ‘Mr-I-glare-at-that-old-British-dude-for-buying-an-original-John Trumbull-canvas-to-decorate-his-guestroom’!”, she retorted challengingly. “These objects are as important to historians as those Revolutionary War paintings you keep talking about. They shouldn’t be kept in here only to be displayed once a year to a bunch of rich morons who care more about how much he paid for it than about what these objects were”.

“I know, I know…” Adrian admitted with a sight, raising his hands in surrender. “But as I said, there is not much we can do about it now. Let try to survive through this tour and enjoy the night.”

Rolling her eyes, Ellie let out an annoyed sight and finally nodded, her tensed shoulders still betraying her frustration.

The tour proceeded, Adrian and Ellie sharing eye rolls and annoyed looks every time Emile would brag about the price of a unique item. They always kept behind when they could, making a point of looking at some of the glass panels in detail to at least try to learn a little something out of this display of wealth. But that revealed to be a nearly impossible endeavour. There was barely any labels or information attached to these objects whatsoever. Nothing there to keep them distracted from that never ending tour. Well. Apart from each other.

It started with just the tingle of his breath in her neck as he was hovering above her to look at an old grease-lamp from some ancient cave. And then continued as she would casually hook her arm through his while staring at the antic statue of a Roman god. And a brush of his fingers down her spine as he stood behind her pretending to listen to Emile’s dull blabber. Her hand sneaking along the side of his thigh as they followed the group around. The light pressure of his hand on her lower back as he led her to move past him into yet another room.

Pretending to pay attention to their host was increasingly difficult. Preventing their faces from betraying their very unprofessional thoughts even more so.

“I know I have said this before but…”, Adrian whispered in her ear, a playful smile forming on his lips, “I love that little tempter of yours… it makes me feel… a lot of things”.

He could hear Ellie’s heartbeat race in her chest at his words, even though she was keeping her eyes trained on the display panel before them, doing her best to keep her composure while the predatory tone in his voice was making her knees tremble slightly. The other guests were buzzing around them, pointing at glass display cases here and architectural features there, oblivious to the heat surrounding the two secret lovers as if the bubble Adrian and Ellie had formed around them had turned them into two of those trinkets exposed around the room that nobody was truly paying attention to.

Trying to break through the thick air that had been lingering between them, Ellie shifted on her heels to follow the flock of people that were regrouping to move along, casting a knowing smile at Adrian, and holding his gaze for a few seconds before walking away.

But before she could turn left into the next corridor, she felt his arm wrap around her middle, only to swiftly whoosh her aside to a secluded corner of the room, out of sight from the rest of the group thanks to one of the strong pillars that supported the roof of the exhibition room. A gasp escaped her lips as he sprung her around, pressing her back against the cold marble as he eagerly captured her lips in a searing kiss, his hands pressed against her neck, and his torso edging closer to her chest as she was gradually yielding to his powerful embrace.

Trailing her fingers up his neck until they reached his hair, she eventually gave a gentle tug so that she could make a break for air, their lips just a few inches apart as she teased, breathless: “I thought we had to keep our public appearances strictly professional, Mr Raines?”

She felt his grin against her mouth more than she could see it. “Well, what we are doing now is purely professional, Miss Reed. If there was anyone left around to see us, I’d just explain how I was telling all about...” he paused to nibble at her lower lip for a few seconds, “... about the sturdiness of these eighteenth-century pillars...”.

“Eighteenth century, han?” she giggled against his lips, her voice catching in her throat to form a silent moan as Adrian’s mouth began to trail down her chin to follow her jawline.

Her mind struggling between the will to keep her eyes open to check that no one was in sight, and the tantalizing swirls of his tongue against the skin beneath her ear, the shivers that were running down her spine quickly sorted that battle for her. She let her eyelids drop and her head fall back to rest against the stone behind her, focusing only on Adrian’s touch and on the way his hands had now started to drift from her neck to her shoulders, inching lower and lower as his mouth tasted the salt of the skin down her neck and along her collarbone.

Her hands unconsciously travelling from his hair to his back, they suddenly grabbed his shoulders a little tighter to press him closer as she felt him reach for the fabric of her dress to bunch the black silk over her hips. It took all of her will to remain silent when Adrian wedged his knee between her legs, her lips tightening in a thin line to repress a whimper as his fingers trailed down one of her thigh to her knee so he could lift her leg up against his hip, pressing himself forward to conquer the empty space between them.

She could feel his grin against her windpipes when her hips started to grind against his of their own accord, the tight grip of his fingers against her rear sending waves of heat down to where their bodies met.

“I think one of us should keep an eye on that corridor, in case anyone is sent out to look for us” he whispered against her skin, before lifting his gaze back to her, his golden eyes glimmering with mischief. “Would that be a mission you’d be happy to take on, Miss Reed?”

“Of course” she manages to answer, her voice croaking from anticipation.

“Good.” he grins. “Then, you’ll have to face the other way…”

She barely had time to register what he meant before she felt the heat of his body replace the cold marble that had been pressing against her back. She instinctively reached forward to place her palms on the pillar as Adrian resumed his pressing touches eagerly, one arm wrapped around her chest to keep her close, and the other finding its way between her thighs.

She could peek at the corridor ahead of them from where they stood, most of their bodies hidden by the imposing column that seemed to edge closer and closer to her as Adrian’s touch became more insistent. But being able to see ahead did not mean that she was actually looking. Even if she had wanted to fulfil her ‘mission’, the pressure of his left palm against her thigh and the hand that slipped under the fabric of her cleavage made it near impossible to focus on the task. The soft bites and kisses her neck were subjected to were not helping either.

Not being able to see or touch him was like torture, his quiet groans vibrating from his chest to her ribs, and his arousal pressing firmly against her back like a wicked promise that was for now beyond reach. Her back arched involuntarily when a firm hand grabbed her breast, his warm breath beneath her ear betraying his grin as the fingers on her thigh started to wander towards the edge of her underwear, playing with the seam of the lace before sneaking underneath with a deliberate slowness that had her whimper behind her tightened lips.

The light graze of his fingertips against her swollen nerves was all that was needed to weaken all muscles in her body, making both of them dangerously tumble forward as her arms gave in, removing the only leverage she had against Adrian’s pressure in her back, which had been keeping her so far from being flushed against the cold marble with no room to escape the sweet torment of his heated caresses.

Even though her eyes were now shut, she knew that Adrian was watching closely her features when she let her head fall back to rest in his shoulder, her brain going into overdrive when his touch became more pressing, kneading her breast and drawing lazy circles against her centre relentlessly. It was not long before she lost the last bit of control she had left over her own body, her lips parting slightly to let a moan escape, quickly muffled by Adrian’s mouth covering hers in an attempt to preserve the silence around them.

That might have worked perfectly, if only he had been able to kiss her with more restraint. Instead, his tongue had quickly found its way through her parted lips, brushing hers in patterns mirroring the movement of his fingertips between her legs, swallowing her whines as if he could taste her own pleasure through the ragged sounds that he was drawing out of her.

She was itching to touch him. One of her hands had left the cold surface of the pillar to find its way to his head and tangle in his hair, her entire body squirming against his to seek the friction that she was craving for. She knew he was trying to make her lose her mind. And it was working. She could feel his fingers slide gradually further down against her core, dipping into the wetness of her folds before retreating back, drawing growl after growl each time.

She could tell Adrian was relishing this by the way the corners of his mouth curled against hers. It was only when he suddenly pulled away from her swollen lips that she finally opened her eyes again, the lust and wickedness of his gaze sending a shiver all the way down to her toes. He had stopped moving, simply holding her petite form against his chest as tight as deemed possible, his golden eyes anchored to hers with an unmistakable gleam of challenge and promise.

“Adrian…” she mumbled feebly, desperately trying to grind against him but unable to resist his hold on her.

He smiled, remaining silent for a few seconds, before finally breaking the stillness with a low, husky voice, in a tone that was somehow both inviting and commanding: “Say please”.

There was no hesitation in her response, no control, her rasped voice echoing around the room as she begged, breathless: “Adrian, pleeeaaase…”

Thankfully, he did not make her say it again, barely waiting a few seconds before plugging a finger into her dampened slit, followed nearly immediately by a second, resuming his circular patterns over her swollen clit with the pad of his thumb. Withdrawing and dipping back into her with maddening slowness, she could feel her muscles clench around his fingers and her knees start to quiver as the pleasure was slowly building in.

Her dilated pupils could not tear away from his golden eyes, silently begging for more as he increased his pace, his hips grinding voraciously against her back, his mouth inches from hers as if resisting the urge to kiss her so that he could revel in the sweet music of her feverish whines echoing around them.

“Adrian… this is… so…” she tried to mutter between her gasps.

Adrian’s eyes flashed with a voracious gleam as he purred against her lips with a proud smirk, “so… good?”.

Her lips pursed weakly to form a teasing grin. “So… unprofessional”.

His smirk only widened further at her words, his hands suddenly moving away from her burning skin to grip her hips, making her head jerk up from his shoulder in surprise. She was about to complain when he swiftly swirled her body around and crashed his lips onto hers, pushing her back against the pillar, the contrast between the cold marble and the heat of her skin making her jump a little in his grasp.

It was not long before Adrian’s hands had found their way back beneath her dress, his fingers reaching hurriedly for the hem of her thong as his mouth started to descend from her mouth to her chin, roaming over her neck and her collarbone, until he sunk to his knees before her, skipping the parts of her that were covered by fabric to head straight for the space right below her navel. Dragging her underwear down her legs, he only broke the contact between his warm lips and her skin so that he could guide the lace over her heels, quickly shoving the fabric in his pocket before capturing her pulsing nub between his lips, not wasting any minute before expertly starting to explore her aching core, nibbling and suckling with an unmatched dedication.

Her hands were roaming all over his head, tangling her fingers in his hair and pushing her hips forward to demand more, her lower lip caught between her teeth to repress the urge to cry out with every stroke of his tongue, or every time the deft fingers that were slithering up and down her inner thigh came close enough to tease her entrance before retreating back wickedly. As much as part of her wanted to pull him back up to his feet and beg him to take her now, the other part could not even fathom the idea of making him stop his godly work between her legs.

There was no more coherent thought going through her fogged brain. Fragmentary visions of heated memories and unspoken fantasies were flashing before her eyes, mingling with the rousing sight of Adrian down on his knees before her, tasting her fervently in every way that she had ever dreamt of being tasted.

When she felt the intoxicating warmth of his mouth suddenly leave her centre, her mind unconsciously thanked him for ending this sweet torture, expecting the yearning in her core to be satiated soon enough when she would finally get to feel him inside her.

But that sweet release never came.

It took her a few seconds to realise that Adrian had jerked back up to his feet and hurriedly pulled down the fabric of her dress, unceremoniously grabbing Ellie’s waist to move her away from their hiding spot, releasing his grip once she was standing beside him in front of one of the display cases, their back turned away from the corridor.

She had to grip the edge of the display case to keep herself steady, her knees still trembling from Adrian’s handywork just a few seconds before, her eyes opening and closing at a maddening pace to try to clear her clouded brain and regain her senses. It was only when she heard the distinct sound of a pair of heels echoing towards them that she finally understood.

“Monsieur Raines?”, they heard a woman’s voice call out at a distance.

Adrian’s cheeks were flushed, and his hair completely tousled, but he made a quick work of fixing it as well as fixing his shirt with a smirk, mastering the art of regaining his composure in a flick of an eye, like the annoyingly perfect businessman that he was. Ellie fumbled around in an attempt to do the same, fully aware that she would never be able to be as efficient as Adrian, especially in the state of desperate yearning that he had just put her through. She was still panting, her heart thumping in her chest, pupils dilated and cheeks hot from so much blood rushing to her face, both from arousal and from the embarrassment that she knew was about to come.

Ellie jumped a little when the woman’s voice finally reached the room they were in: “Ah, Monsieur Raines! Je vous ai trouvé! Le buffet va commencer, si vous voulez bien rejoindre les autres invités dans le jardin?”.

Ellie had no clue what the woman had just said, and was in no shape to turn around and let the woman see the state of her. She was so grateful that Adrian knew exactly what to say and how to behave casually to buy her a few more minutes to sort out the mess he had made of her… although hearing him speak French was not helping much getting her arousal under control, as he politely answered the woman: “Merci, nous vous rejoignons dans quelques instants.”.

Ellie sighted with relief when she heard the woman’s footsteps retreat, turning around to face him, glaring at him with her best attempt at a reproachful scowl.

“That was….” she started, before being interrupted by Adrian’s mouth on hers, as he pressed a soft kiss on her swollen lips, before pulling away slowly with a grin.

“… unprofessional?” he teased, earning a falsely unamused eye-roll in return.

“We better get going, the party is starting, and all of the other guests are gathered in the gardens now” he announced, translating what the woman had said, but not releasing Ellie from his embrace just yet.

“I am in no state for socialising now” she admitted with a grimace, although she could not fight the teasing grin that was starting to form on her face. “I will never be able to focus properly after this… all I will be thinking about is sorting out this… hum, unfinished business…”

Adrian’s hold tightened a little more around her waist at her words, his eyes still gleaming with mischief and never leaving hers when he stepped slowly away, grabbing her hand to start dragging them both away from the room.

His voice was husky and full of promise when he casually answered with a teasing smile: “Well… unfortunately, we’ll have to play along a little bit longer I’m afraid… but I will certainly be looking forward all evening to the second part of this… unfinished business…”.

~~~

N/A: If anyone else is as eager as Adrian to see how ‘Part II’ of their little ‘public indiscretions’ is going to play out, let me know, and I’d be happy to oblige 😉 This prompt has inspired me way too much, thank you so much for the ask @mssukeyna 😉

~~~

Tagging @adriansbiss , @itsjustwinter , @shanzay44 , @purvishraick, @thefrenchiemama

@choicesficwriterscreations

#bloodbound #bloodbound choices #adrian raines #adrian raines x mc #bloodbound fanfiction #cfwc #choices fanfiction #play choices #choices stories you play #choices fic writers creations #fics of the week #asked and answered

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daily-douma · 4 years

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Demon With No Name

An analysis on Upper Moon Two: Douma

Demon Slayer: Kimetsu no Yaiba spoilers!!

Hello! ❤ I wanted to discuss the significance on Douma’s real name never being revealed to us in the KNY story.

I'd love it if you guys could share your thoughts on this with me please!

Before I start:

Disclaimer: I do not speak Japanese at all, I’m basing all quotes off of the first manga site i could find. Translations may vary depending on the source. Also I may not be aware of alternate meanings of words that may have been lost in translation for the most important quotes! So please forgive me if I misinterpret something!!

A lot of the demons in KNY’s story are either nameless, or go by an alias that isn’t their real name. Examples of the former include most minor demons, such as the Temple Demon, Swamp Demon, Older brother/sister, Mother, and Father Spider demons, etc. Examples of the latter are mostly are more relevant Upper moon demons-- Daki, Akaza, and Kokushibou, whose real names are Ume, Hakuji, and Michikatsu respectively. The other upper moons, Nakime, Gyokko, and Hantengu, however, don’t have their human names revealed, along with Douma. However, these 3, did not hold as much story significance as Douma.

Then in addition to that, there are some demons who go by their human names still, such as Rui and Kaigaku. I assume it is because they are young enough relative to other demons age that they haven’t forgotten it (or maybe they just like their human names lol).

(I don’t know if Gyutaro’s name is his actual name or a fake name and, if it is a fake name, I don’t remember if his real name is actually given, which is weird because his sister’s was. But that’s a topic for another day.)

However, Douma, who holds the rank of Upper Moon 2, is one of the most relevant demons in the story, yet his real name is never disclosed. Even in the Kimetsu Acadmeny chapter extras, is stated that his AU version’s real name is unknown.

So, why is that? Douma even said so himself that he has great memory. He remembered many details of his life but he failed to ever disclose to us his name. Was that one thing he did forget? Was it not important to him? Did he simply not have a real name before becoming a demon? (Maybe his parents thought he was above having a normal human name?) And most importantly, was this intentionally done by Kyoharu Gotouge?

Before I continue, first we should know the meaning behind Douma’s name. His name is officially 童磨. According to the Kimetsu no Yaiba wiki, 童 ( dō ) means “child,” and 磨 (ma) which can mean “polishe,” “grind,” or “improve.” (Someone also said it can mean magic but I don’t have the source im sorry :( ) Based on these, Douma’s name has a meaning somewhere along the lines of “magical child” or “polished child.” This is most likely to reference how his parents thought he had divine powers at his birth.

For most people, your name is one of the most significant aspect of one’s identity. It’s the first bit of information you to give to anybody upon introduction. However, Douma’s unknown name is a demonstration of his own lack of personal identity.

If we take a look back at Douma’s childhood, he’s been put on as the figurehead of the Eternal Paradise cult from the day he could even sit up. His entire life he was put on a pedestal for an identity he did not make for himself, but one manufactured and forced onto him by his parents. In chapter 142, Douma admits that he can’t speak to the Gods or have any spiritual connections that his parents believe he has. In fact, he doesn’t even believe in any of it. If that’s the case, why does he seem so fixated on the idea of bringing his troubled followers to “paradise” as his sole reason for being born?

Earlier I mentioned that one large aspect of identity is our name. However, another important aspect in defining our identity is the personal relationships we have around us. Who we value and surround ourselves will shape our own individual perceptions of ourselves. However, Douma, who has admitted to having limited capability in feeling emotions, is unable to form meaningful bonds with people around him. Demon Slayer: Kimetsu no Yaiba is story where most, if not all, the main themes revolve around love, family, and friendship being the main motivators to drive characters in the pursuit of goals. However, here we have a character who serves as a direct antithesis to of all these themes. He has nobody he loves and nobody who loves him.

In chapter 157, Kanao calls out Douma in their fight, telling him she can see through the fake persona he puts on. She then proceeds to question him: “Why were you even born?” (damn....) Douma gave clearly visible cues that he was not pleased with what she had to say. The important observation to take from this scene is Douma’s reaction. The man who was just revealed to not feel any emotions, who is usually unbothered by harsh words thrown at him from demon slayers and other members of the upper moons alike, showed an emotional response to the cutting words of a child questioning his existence.

Based on this reaction, I think there is reason to believe Douma has an innate dissatisfaction with his own identity, or moreso his lack of identity. From his childhood, he’s been more than aware of how he cannot feel emotions the same as others. Even in his dying thoughts in chapter 163, he thinks back on how he was “always been this way.” He thinks about how human emotions to him were nothing more than “mere dreams.”

I think should we take a close look at the word choice used here. He could have simply said something along the lines of “I’ve never felt emotions;” however Gotouge specifically phrased it as a metaphor comparing it to dreams. This word choice conveys a sense of longing associated with the idea of being able to experience emotion. This suggests that there is a chance he did wish for a better understanding of emotions. After all, like Kanao said, what’s the point of living if one can’t truly indulge in all of life’s pleasures associated with the emotional bonds we build with one another?

However, what does all this of this have to do with Douma not having a name? Douma not having a name is symbolic of his entire character. He is a man with no true identity of his own. He was unable to maintain any close, meaningful, interpersonal relationships with anyone around him in the hundreds of years he lived. He lived every day with a false persona knowing deep down inside of him knowing he was different from everyone else around him, but not in the “spiritual way” that was expected of him. And in his own Nihilistic opinion, he felt his own life was pointless. But as a direct contradiction to those beliefs, he continues to lie to himself, telling himself the people need him to save them. It’s ironic--Douma, the man who mocked demon slayers’ efforts to do whatever they can to achieve their goals, is doing the most to do whatever he can to mask the emptiness he feels inside. His boastfulness of his cult, his over-acting of emotions, and his insistence of friendly and polite conversation even in the face of insults and attacks from opponents all demonstrate this. While he may not be able to process and understand emotions like most people, there is one thing that Douma appears to have in common with many people: wanting a sense of purpose and meaningfulness in life.

While Douma’s reason for becoming a demon is never explicitly disclosed in the manga, I think we have reason to suspect him of becoming a demon for the purpose of finding an identity to call his own. Muzan Kibutsuji is notorious for taking advantage of humans who are at their lowest points in their life. They have lost everything that mattered to them and have no one else to turn to. However, it was a different case with Douma--a man with no loved ones, no purpose, no real identity--already had nothing to lose to in the first place.

Despite all Douma thought he though he “dedicated [...] to people and made contributions to the world,” in the end, his choice to become a demon never brought him the sense of identity and purpose he sought out by the time of his death. Unlike even other demons, who had family members they could happily reunite with in death, he would simply be forgotten from the rest of the world. Sure, maybe the demon slayers will remember him as Douma, one of the strongest demons. However,there was not a single person who knew the real Douma, the real name behind the man who served as Upper Moon 2 under Muzan. He will just continue to remain nameless even in death. A cruel reminder of how any way Muzan’s involvement in any other demon’s life did nothing to improve any of their lives, if not worsen it.

I don’t think I worded this well but I hope it still makes sense to everyone 🥺

#Douma #dōma #kny #kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer #character analysis

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infinitxes · 2 years

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anonymous said:

Hi there, please excuse me for coming outta nowhere but i really like how you portray Gojo and i wanted to ask; Is he in love with anyone else in the manga besides Geto? I personally can't see him with anyone else and i feel like it would be out of character for him, plus not really the story author is trying to tell. Either way, would love to see what you have to say, if you want of course! :)

Hi there anon! First thing off the bat, I'm really glad to see that you enjoy my portrayal! There's no greater flattery and you are making me weep. But first of all, a disclaimer! This is my opinion, and if you don't agree, so be it! I’m just an idiot who finds too much comfort in this six-eyed freak.

I've actually written a small meta post about Satoru and relationships here. That pretty much sums up how I feel about him, and how I think he'd approach a romantic relationship- that is to say, not very well. I don’t think he’s ready for a relationship (he can barely handle friendship or intimacy in any quantity for gods sake), and he just doesn’t seem like the kind of person who’d be willing to devote himself to a singular love interest (not quite yet at least).

But onto the point! I feel that the relationship with Suguru is probably the closest relationship Satoru has ever had with another person, and I think that's probably because of two things-

One, Suguru being in a position where it’s possible to be sympathetic to how it feels to be 'the strongest’. He understands how it feels to be revered and raised on a pedestal because of his abilities, and that’s likely already a pretty big plus in Satoru’s book.

Two, how Suguru's non-Jujutsu background allowed him to see Satoru as less of a weapon/the chosen one, and primarily as a human being. I theorise that Satoru had a childhood that was pretty deficient in fun and friends, hence why he retains so many juvenile characteristics even into adulthood. It’d definitely have been a refreshing change for him to finally meet someone who was so-called friend material!

Now as to whether they were romantic or not? I personally ship them! And even otherwise, I’d be perfectly happy to say that they were more than friends, even if romance wasn’t ever overtly stated (mostly because I can also see them both dancing around their feelings for the longest time because of their respective egos).

I agree with you in that I can’t see him with anyone else in the manga. Doubly agree on the fact that Satoru’s love life is probably one of the furthest things on our beloved Gege’s mind, it isn’t essential to the plot and throwing it in there would seem irrelevant and forced in my opinion.

That’s my two cents! Thanks for sending in!!

#anon #[asksanswered]#[analysis]

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3pirouette · 3 years

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Fic: By The Sea (1/1)

Title: By the Sea By: TriplePirouette/3Pirouette Disclaimer: They're not mine. Word Count: Distribution: AO3 Anyone else please ask first :)

Part of the Nobody’s Baby Universe

Story Summary: Mandy’s first time at the Beach hijinks. Pure fluff.

A/N: Prompted by an Anon on Tumblr, Mandy’s first trip to the beach. She’s about just shy of 2 years old here, so you can imagine where it falls in the stories. There was about… a two-week hole from when I started this to when I finished it. Fluff doesn’t seem to be what my brain wants to focus on right now. Hope you all enjoy.

~*~

Peggy straightened; her one hand still held tight in Mandy’s as she pulled her sunglasses down with the other. “Well, this is quite embarrassing.”

Ana leaned over, holding the umbrella tight over the three of them as she whispered conspiratorially, “How long do you think it will take them?”

Peggy smiled, looking over the men a few dozen feet down the beach as they struggled with the poles and fabric that was supposed to be an easily assembled gazebo to keep them out of the sun. She shrugged and leaned over again, moving as Mandy toddled along, unsteady in the sand and dragging her along. “Well, we have the world’s strongest man, the world’s smartest man, and the world’s most patient man all working together.”

Ana followed, keeping the three fair ladies in the shade of the umbrella as Mandy led them back and forth in the new novelty of the sand. “So, next week then?”

Peggy laughed, and Mandy stopped, looking up and laughing, too, though she didn’t quite understand what she was laughing at. Peggy and Ana shared a look that lasted only a moment before Mandy pulled them along again. “Quite,” Peggy agreed. “If anything,” she ventured another peak over where Steve was consulting directions, Howard was blatantly ignoring them, and Jarvis was standing in the blaring sun, long suffering, “we’ll be lucky to have it for lunch.”

“Unch?” Mandy asked, looking up and smiling.

“Yes, darling, lunch.” Peggy repeated the word, exaggerating her lips. “Lunch.”

“Unch!” Mandy babbled it over and over, kicking her feet up and giggling as the sand kicked up into the air and squished between her toes.

“Want to switch?” Ana asked, holding out the umbrella.

“Ah, yes, please!” Peggy sighed happily, turning and handing Mandy’s sweaty hands over to Ana’s trusty grip. “She needs to grow six inches or I need to shrink. The leaning over is just terrible!”

“Aww, I think she’s just delightful the way she is!” Ana cooed the words, leaning over to kiss Mandy on the cheek as she adjusted her grip. “Though, yes, the leaning is terrible.”

Peggy stood, arching back as she held the umbrella over the three of them, the shade helpful but no match for the heat. “She’s gotten much steadier on her own, but…”

“Nard!” Mandy squeaked, pulling Ana along towards a group of seagulls.

“No darling,” Peggy followed dutifully, “that’s not Bernard, that’s a seagull.”

“Nard!” She tried again, this time taking one hand from Ana and pointing at a stray that was wandering closer.

“No, seagull.”

Mandy pouted, looking up at Peggy obstinately. “Nard!”

Peggy squatted down, meeting Mandy at her height and brushing the errant hairs from her sweaty forehead. “No. Darling, Bernard had to stay at the house. That is a seagull.” Peggy shook her head and looked at Ana as she stood. “I swear, Howard is on my shit list for ever introducing her to that bird!”

“Shit.”

Peggy and Ana both stopped and looked down at Mandy, who was smiling wide with the new word she’d just learned. She said it again. “Shit.”

Peggy turned away, smiling and waving at the boys who were somewhat farther along in their job, but still no closer to having any kind of actual shelter. “Steve is going to kill me,” she whispered to Ana, a hint of real panic in her eyes. “She said ‘damn’ three times last week.”

Ana chuckled, far less concerned. “She’s learning new words every day. Just ignore it and she’ll drop it.”

“Nard!”

“See?” Ana let Mandy pull away from her grip and toddle a few steps away. “She’s forgotten already!”

Peggy glanced back at Steve, dutifully still trying to hold poles in ways that seemed to defy gravity, knowing any anger he might feel would be minimal as he was having his own issues with curbing his language, as well. Mandy was silent for a moment, then her voice picked up a sound that Peggy had started to get far too familiar with and that meant mischief was coming. “Nard?”

Peggy swooped down, dropping the umbrella and grabbing Mandy right before she could grab a fistful of an unsuspecting seagull she’d managed to sneak up on. “Oh no, no touching the seagulls young lady!” Peggy kept her voice light, but she was frazzled enough that there was anxiety in her voice.

Mandy, however, was unhappy with being taken away from her find and let out a loud and shrill squeal as she squirmed to get out of Peggy’s hands and down to chase the bird that had now flow away. The sound caught the attention of most everyone on the beach, but especially Steve, who dumped the armful of posts and fabric he was holding into Jarvis’s hands without thinking before jogging over to Peggy.

Peggy was sure she would have found the way Jarvis slowly crumbled to the ground, trying his best to hold the weight of his new load and failing, quite comical had she not been trying her best to keep the squirming and crying toddler in her arms from running down the beach.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Steve was barely out of breath when he reached them, his arms out to be handed his daughter.

“Dad-dy,” Mandy moaned as he took her in his arms, as if Peggy had horribly wronged her by keeping her away from the seagulls.

“Drama queen,” Peggy whispered, shifting her caftan back in place. Steve just looked at her as Mandy burrowed into his arms, smiling. “She’s cross that I wouldn’t let her grab a seagull.”

“Oh, how dare Mama?” Steve cooed at Mandy as she quieted, brushing her hair back as he shared a look with Peggy over her head. “How dare she keep you safe!”

Peggy sighed, trying to pull Mandy’s disheveled hair back into the small ponytail they’d managed that morning. “How’s the hut coming?”

“Oh, you mean Howard’s overly expensive, overly complicated, tent?” Steve rolled his eyes and started to rock back and forth. “We’ll be lucky if it’s up by dinner.”

“We were hoping lunch,” Ana chimed in, stepping over and setting herself and Peggy under the umbrella.

Steve looked back, lips pressed tight. “If you guys can distract Howard, I think Jarvis and I can get it up by ourselves. He keeps trying to ‘improve’ the design.”

“Oh, good lord,” Peggy mumbled, reaching for Mandy and taking her in her arms. “Work fast, please? She’s getting cranky already.”

Peggy and Ana followed Steve back to the little site they’d staked out, far away from the other early morning beachgoers. Howard was on his knees, picking up pipe fittings and tossing them aside. “Why didn’t they include a J fitting in here?”

“Perhaps, sir, it’s because the design doesn’t call for one?” Jarvis asked, his voice far less sarcastic than the situation called for, as he tried to dodge and yet gather the pieces Howard was tossing away.

“Well, it should. It would make the design much better.”

“Howard!” Peggy called sharply, making the man look up. “Just the man I need. I have had a fabulous idea and need to speak to you about it just this minute.”

He turned back to his pile of fittings as Steve took Jarvis aside and whispered their play. “Alright.”

She pulled her sunglasses down and looked at him. “By the water.”

He set his hands on his knees, shaking his head at her. “I’m kinda in the middle—”

“My daughter is suffering, Howard. It’s a hot, humid day in the blinding sunlight and you’d deny my daughter the relief of the cool ocean water?” Peggy shook her head, clicking her tongue against the roof of her mouth. “You’d deny your own goddaughter her first steps in the Pacific Ocean, Howard?”

Howard stood, brushing the sand off his knees, mock outrage on his face. “You make me sound like a monster, Peg!” He turned back to the pile of tent supplies. “Do you—” Howard hadn’t even managed a whole sentence, and Steve and Jarvis already had a tent pole set and secured. “Yup, I think they’ll be okay without me, lead on, Peg.”

Ana watched as they left towards the water and bent down, taking Howard’s place and sorting the connecting parts. “How long do you think Peggy will be able to keep him busy?”

“Oh,” Steve paused to lift a pole in place and waited while Jarvis secured it, “Peggy’s a wiz at wrangling him, I don’t know how she does it.”

“I find her handling of him quite spectacular,” Jarvis’ voice was high as he reached on his tip toes to secure a nut into place. He finished and slumped down, moving on to the next section, “I’ve managed to learn a thing or two from her in that regard.”

“What could she still possibly have to talk to him about?” Ana moved on to start sorting the lump of fabric that was supposed to go over the supports. “They just spent four days with the Colonel going through that entire Los Angeles office!”

“Who knows? She always manages to find some way of distracting him.” Steve set the last crossbeam up and secured it into place and looked at the bones of the tent, set securely in the sand. “Well, look at that, it really is easy to put up.”

“When you don’t have a narcissistic engineer trying to run the project,” Ana mumbled, pulling the light canvas wide.

~*~

Howard kicked the sand as they got close to the water’s edge. “I know what you’re doing, Peg.”

“Guilting you to come out to the water so they can get the tent set up so we can start our day at the beach?” She smiled, sitting at the water’s edge and sitting Mandy between her legs.

Howard sat down next to her, the edge of the waves running up just to meet their feet. “Something like that.” He wiggled his fingers at Mandy, trying not to sound maudlin. “It’s hard for me to not try, you know?”

Peggy let the girl crawl between them, one hand on her as she sat. “I know, which is why sometimes you need a friend to step in and remind you that you don’t need to impress us.” She smiled as Mandy patted Howard on the thigh then laid her head on him, babbling little noises to herself as she splashed her feet in the remnants of the waves. “See? She doesn’t care if you can make the tent better.”

Howard smiled, looking back out over the water. “You know, kid, you almost, almost make me want to think about settling down, you’re that cute.”

“Dah cu!” Mandy replied, smacking his leg a few times and sitting up, giggling.

Peggy held her own laugh back. “Yes, yes, you’re cute. We all know.” She leaned over and kissed the girl’s forehead before wetting her hand and letting it run over Mandy’s neck and back to cool her.

“How are they—” Howard laughed as he looked back, Steve and Jarvis on their knees, tying the last few flaps of the cabana in place. “Guess it was easy to set up, after all.”

Peggy stood and pulled Mandy into her arms, trying to wipe off the wet sand before she reached down and tapped Howard on the shoulder. “Come along, you. There’s fun to be had today, and we’re not letting a tent stand in our way.”

~*~

The shade was a relief for the small group, and between Steve and Jarvis they had the small set of tables and chairs set up quickly, and Mandy was out like a light in the little wooden pay pen as soon as they set her in it.

“You two should go for a swim,” Ana encouraged Peggy and Steve. “She’ll be no trouble while she’s sleeping.”

“Well, if—” The sound that came out of Peggy’s mouth after that couldn’t exactly be called undignified, but there were only so many noises she could make as Steve rushed her and flung her over his shoulder. “Brute!” she called, laughing as he nearly ran with her to the beach, arms pounding at his back.

Steve stopped, looking at her over his shoulder, one eyebrow raised. “You were about to ‘well’ your way out of it.”

She pressed her hands into his back and looked at him over the edge of her sunglasses. “I was about to say, ‘well, if you insist,’ darling.”

Steve slowly put her down, an impish smile on his face as she followed her the few steps back to the tent. “In my defense…”

Peggy turned and walked backwards, pulling her sunglasses off and looked at him seriously. “In your defense, I’m often a wet blanket.” She tipped her head and licked her lips. “Good thing for you, my intentions are quite different today.”

Peggy turned, stripping off her caftan to reveal a bright red bikini. She folded it and slipped off her shoes, dropping her things in a pile in the shade of tent. She set her hands on her hips, bright smile on her face as she turned back to him. “Well? What do you think? It’s French.”

Steve nodded, slowly stepping up towards her. Without another word he tossed her over his shoulder once again, heading towards the water. “I think I’m one lucky guy,” he laughed, setting her down at the water’s edge.

Howard stepped forward, watching from the shade of the tent as Steve and Peggy slowly made their way into the chill of the Pacific Ocean. “Who’d think it?” he wondered out loud.

“Who’d think what, sir?” Jarvis asked as he was setting out fruit from the picnic basket next to him.

Howard smiled, watching as Steve lifted Peggy out of the water keeping her head and shoulders dry as a wave hit him straight in the face. As it receded, she reached down, wiping the water from his eyes and kissing him softly. “Who would guess that the world’s best super solder and the world’s most dangerous spy are two idiots in love?”

Ana laughed from her chair, pulling out a book and peeking over at Mandy. “No one, which is what makes it even better.” She sighed, leaning back and opening her book. “God help anyone who crosses them, though.”

Howard scoffed, putting on his own sunglasses. “Oh, yeah.” He leaned out and looked down the beach. “I’m uh, gonna go meet some of the locals.” He looked around the small haven and smiled. “You two ok by yourselves the munchkin?”

“Quite fine, sir,” Jarvis replied, taking his own seat next to his wife. “Lunch will be ready at noon on the dot.”

Ana put her book down as Howard walked away, whistling as he made his way down the beach. From her chair she could see Mandy reposition herself, sighing as she fell back asleep, and Steve and Peggy laughing in the waves a few dozen yards down the beach. She reached out taking her husband’s hand. “How many girls do you think he’ll bring back this time?”

“At least two,” Edwin leaned back, kissing her hand before relaxing in the chair. “How long do you think the two of them will be out there?”

“Oh, until lunch, I’d say,” Ana looked out, smiling as they splashed each other, “Or until Peggy’s skin’s as red as her bathing suit, whichever comes first.” She lifted her book. “Poor thing hasn’t figured out how to deal with California sunshine.”

Edwin picked an apple from the spread on the table. “Don’t worry, I’ve packed the aloe.”

“Good man, Mr. Jarvis.”

“Well, someone has to take care of them.” He bit into the apple, chewing thoughtfully. “They may be dedicated parents, the world’s strongest man, the world’s best female spy, and then of course we also have the world’s smartest man, but none of them can cook or clean house if their life depended on it. And sewing? Ha!” He swallowed and looked over at his wife. “I’d say it’s quite lucky we all managed to find one another, wouldn’t you?”

Ana smiled, “Yes, quite, my love.”

#Steggy Fic #3P's Fic #Nobody's Baby #Anon prompted #FLUFF

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darkdevasofdestruction · 4 years

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Remember Me ~ Worick Arcangelo x Reader

Disclaimer: This is going to have mentions of past abuse and supposedly illegal behaviour, but considering it’s Gangsta we’re talking about, I don’t think anyone should be surprised by darker themes addresses.

Birthdays...Have always been tedious. A drag. More work than they are worth...So, I wonder...Why do I actually bother doing a party at my home?

I mean, it’s true, I get it, I’m 21, I’m of age...Legally an adult, legally allowed to drink, legally everything whatever...The same as it has been for the past 3 years...

And MAYBE it’s fun to sometimes gather around with your friends and do the same things everyone always does at parties, loud music, alcohol, cigarettes and gossips...

But there is always that annoying anxiety feeling surging through my veins whenever I have to be around more than 3 of my friends, considering this is a party organised by me, and everything has to be done perfectly, everyone must feel good, and at home, not to be left out...

I can already envision myself being the only outcast, anyway, but that’s besides the point.

It’s already evening, the alcohol is sitting on the table, the pizza boxes are stacked up in a mountain on the floor, plastic cups everywhere, ash trays placed strategically, dim lights, coloured light projectors to make the room look like a disco...

And then there’s me. Sitting anxiously on the couch in the living room, dressed in a pair of dark jeans and a long plaid shirt with the sleeves rolled up, along with some silver rings and a necklace. Casual, comfy, yet pretty elegant in its simplicity.

My friends arrived soon, very loudly congratulating me on aging one more year, fantastic...But they had a mischievous smirk on their faces...

And they brought in a tall, blond man who looked very macho, and I could only blink in confusion as everyone walked inside.

“Uhm...Who is he? One of yours boyfriend or something?” I asked, eyeing everyone attentively. “Nooo, silly! He’s our gift for you!” my best friend grabbed the man by his arm, shoving him towards me. “I’m...Not sure I follow.” I spoke with even more unease, not wanting to believe what I was hearing. “He’s Ergastulum’s most wanted Gigolo! And tonight, he’s all yours to do with as you please! C’mon, you deserve to let loose and have fun once in a while, y’know? Forget about all those jerks and enjoy pleasure like you’ve never felt before~!” my other best friend grabbed me by my shoulders from behind, putting her chin on top of one of her hands, slurring seductively. “...I see.” I muttered, looking away, trying to mask my displeasure at what I was hearing. “Anyway, let’s get you drunk! You won’t get to enjoy anything if you’re so cold and reserved with everyone, y’know? Maybe that’s why you’re always alone! Now c’mon, let’s have fun!” she dragged me to the drinks table, and we started playing drinking games like never have I ever...

Gotta say, Vodka and Bailey’s has always been a shot combination that I adore, and I’m grateful that it takes a long time to get me drunk, because these girls are wasted, while I’m not, so I can escape their grasp. Drunk dancing isn’t that fun, even to watch, and they were making fools of themselves, screeching, giggling...More or less sounding like pained donkeys.

Or maybe I’m just too judgemental and mean because I’ve been in a bad mood and spiraling since they got in my home. To be fair, I don’t even care what is the truth. These are my feelings and I’m not going to play them off as insignificant or non-existent.

Eyeing them carefully, I take a pack of cigarettes and make my way out of the house and sit on the stairs, taking a deep breath of the cold winter night air, I light up a cigarette, taking a drag and staring up at the sky, letting my endless train of toxic thoughts overwhelm me.

I was so long in my own mind that I didn’t notice the door opening until a shadow blocked my vision, and I noticed the platinum blond man sitting down on the stairs below me, resting his back on the wall on the side.

“Y’know...I haven’t been to many birthday parties before, but I’m pretty sure the birthday girl is supposed to be pampered and the center of attention, and yet, here you are, outside, alone and sad.” the man spoke seriously, with his usual light glint. “How much did they pay you?” I muttered, lighting another cigarette, realising that the other one burn without taking another drag of it. “Hmmm? What do you mean?” he asked, raising an eyebrow at me. “I’m tipsy, not stupid. You think I can’t think rationally after 8 shots? You’re dead wrong. Now, tell me, how much did they pay you and what exactly did they tell you to do?” I asked in a pressed tone, side-eyeing him. “You’re certainly perceptive, I give you that. T’was quite a lot of money to spend the night with you.” he tilted his head in a playful way. “Not only they have no faith in me to get someone to even remotely like me...They have to pay someone to do something that I dread with a burning passion. Do you even know my name? I don’t know yours.” I shrugged, hanging my head, gritting my teeth in annoyance. “I see your friends screwed up a bit. Name’s Worick, nice to meet you.” he extended his hand towards me. “...Y/N. Nice to meet you too...I think.” I sighed, staring reluctantly at his hand, before slowly shaking it. “Pretty name for a pretty girl. Wanna talk to a guy you’ll never see again? I heard that venting and letting out pent up emotions helps.” he offered, making me look at him with a weird face. “You know you’re not gonna get any action, so you try to do something for the money you earned, huh?” I snorted, raking my fingers through my hair. “Hey, don’t look at me like that. Contrary to my profession, I’m a pretty chill guy. What do you have to lose, talking to someone you’ll never see again? And besides, I have little room to judge you, so if that’s your worry, you can throw it away.” he lit up a cigarette, puffing up into the sky. “You’re...Not wrong here. Okay, fine, Pretty Boy. Imagine this. You’re not even of age, you get your first lover and you’re happy. You finally feel superior. Someone gives a fuck about you...That’s the definition of a lover, after all, I guess...But here’s the deal. Barely one month into the relationship, the person starts getting very pushy and pressures you, without you realising. Words and actions. It goes to the point that they force you to do things that you don’t want to and you’re not ready to, mentally or physically...And you can’t do anything except for denying, since they don’t listen and they overpower you. How is that, so far?” I spoke, taking a few breaks in between sentences to keep myself grounded and lucid. “Very suckish. Does any of your friends know that?” Worick asked in a gentle voice. “They do...My two best friends do. The ones who apparently paid you. I don’t know what’s in those tiny brains of theirs, but I don’t think a one night stand is going to somehow magically get me rid of all problems, traumas, self-issues and nightmares I’ve been having for the last years. Or maybe I’m just paranoid. I don’t know, and at this point, I can’t stay that I care.” I shrugged, leaning back on the stairs. “Maybe you have the wrongs friends. I heard words about you that I don’t think friends should speak like that about their so called best friend who trusted them enough with their bad experiences.” he pointed out nonchalantly, as I shifted my gaze towards him with a frown. “After today...I...Think the same. I...Just...Wasn’t expecting something like this. What more can I say. I am disappointed. And if that wasn’t enough, my second boyfriend, who was a virgin, saw my own virginity as a prize. And the third pity-dated me. Can it get any worse? Because, if yes, I honestly give up.” I sighed, ruffling my hair, obviously done with life. “Life sure sucks, huh? And most people don’t make it any better. All we can do is get stronger, carry on, and fight our nightmares.” he nodded in agreement, clearly sympathetic. “...I see you’re speaking from experience. I wonder what happened to your eye...It may sound insensitive, but after what I just told you, I don’t think there’s any more need for caution.” I smirked at him with a dark sort of self-deprecation that I could also sense in him. “Well, y’know...Sometimes parents aren’t the safe haven they ought to be.” he shrugged, extinguishing the finished cigarette on the stairs. “I see. Yeah, life sucks. I guess I can see why you become a Gigolo. An attractive guy selling his body for money...By what they said, you are the most popular. I can see why. I feel sorry for you.” I gave him a sympathetic smile that disappeared as fast as it came. “You have a pretty smile, y’know? I always thought that people who can smile despite all they’ve been through are the strongest.” he commented, smiling back. “Is that why you appear to be so cheerful? You’re strong, not only physically, but mentally and emotionally too? Wish I was the same. Maybe people won’t find me such an easy target to take advantage of.” I snorted sarcastically, making him chuckle. “It’s a pity people are shit to the few remaining ones who don’t give in to society’s awfulness. But what is a sweet girl like you doing in a shithole like Ergastulum? Doesn’t quite add up.” he asked, getting in a better sitting position. “Life happened. Dad left us, and mum is abroad working to get me enough money to go to university by the end of this year. This place, despite how scary and dangerous it is, was the cheapest place I could afford.” I bit my lip, trying not to worry too much about the future. “I’m sure you’re gonna nail it, so don’t worry too much. You seem like a smart girl, so just study hard and don’t forget to enjoy life. By your standards, not others’.” he smirked, tilting his head towards the door. “You’re funny, Worick. I wish we met under different circumstances.” my voice became lower, only to get interrupted by the door slamming open and the girls leaving the place. “Well, look at you two, lovebirds! You look so cuuuuuuuute! Hey, Gigolo, better take good care of her, got it?! The night is still young for you two! Awesome birthday party, as usual, Y/N, see ya next time!” the girls left, making me blush from embarassment, looking away. “You’ve got very sensible friends.” he muttered ironically, shaking his head. “I’ll...Go tidy the apartment. Maybe I’ll be able to focus on something else. Come one, I’ll warm up some pizza.” I shrugged, getting inside the house. “I didn’t think you’d want me around in your home.” Worick pointed out, leaning on a wall. “You got paid to spend the night with me, correct? Then you’ll do what you got paid for. Keeping me company. You have no idea how refreshing it is talking to someone with some fucking brain in their head.” I plopped down on the couch, putting my feet on the table, turning on the TV to a rock music program and patting the seat next to me for him to join. “It’s an honour to spend time with you.” he chuckled, taking a slice of pizza, leaning back on the couch and mimicking my position.

For the rest of the night, he was gracious enough to help me tidy up and clean everything, and when we were finally done, I went to change in my nightgown, taking a book and getting in bed, only to see the man leaning on the frame of the door awkwardly.

“Ah, yes, how could I forget. Let me find some larger clothes for you to change into.” I put the book down, going to the wardrobe and finding some oversized clothes in which I sometimes sleep. “Are these yours?” he chuckled in amusement. “Yep.Gotta be comfy when you sleep, right?” I shrugged, getting back in bed. “Yeah, you’re right. That’s why I sleep naked.” his grin grew wider, making me frown in confusion. “Sleeping naked is comfy for you?” I put the book on my lap, looking at him for an answer. “Did you try?” he asked smugly. “Yeah. I felt incredibly uncomfortable and anxious the for hours and couldn’t sleep. At 4 AM I couldn’t stand it any longer and I put a nightgown on.” I scratched my cheek, looking away. “That’s adorable. What were you reading?” he asked, getting closer to me. “Get changed and you can come over. I’m not letting you sleep on the couch. You got paid, you deserve better.” I waved my hand at him dismissively, only for him to leave the room, get changed, take the book from my hand, flip through all the pages, and return it. “Ah, Picture of Dorian Gray. I’ve been wanting to read it for a while, thanks for the opportunity, I have to say, I rather appreciate his monologues.” he gave me a shit-eating grin, plopping in bed next to me. “I...You...Huh?! You can’t tell me you just read THIS book, right now, for the first time in your life, by just flipping rapidly through the pages!” my expression was that of pure shock and disbelief, which clearly amused him. “That’s exactly what I’m saying, sweet cheeks.” he smirked, laying his head down on the pillow. “You...You have an extraordinary visual memory?!” I asked in a voice that I wasn’t sure was heard. “You’ve got that right, darling.” he chuckled with a satisfied smile. “...WHY THE HELL ARE YOU A PROSTITUTE?! YOU ARE A GENIUS! YOU COULD DO SO MUCH MORE WITH YOUR LIFE! EARN AN UNBELIEVABLE AMOUNT OF MONEY! DO YOU HAVE NO AMBITION AND SAFE-LOVE?!” I grab him by the shoulders, shaking him, until he stopped me. “Calm doooown, Y/N, calm down. Thanks for looking out for me, but life is life. Don’t worry about me. I’ve got all I need here. You, however, have the whole life ahead of you, so don’t waste it like I did.” he advised in a soft voice, making me look at him for a few seconds, before sighing, getting up, and picking another book. “We won’t be seeing each other again, will we? Well, if that’s the case, take this. It’s a thanks for being nice to me today...But promise me you will take your time reading it, unlike now. Rest, relax, drink a hot cup of tea, and read each page carefully. Enjoy it, live it, feel it. Can you promise me that?” I asked, handing him the book. “The Hobbit, huh? Pretty cover, intriguing summary on the back...Fine, Y/N. I can’t 100% promise you, but I will try. Are you really willing to part with this one? It seems special for you.” he asked, more serious this time. “...Maybe sometimes the stupid ideas that your heart gives you are better than the rational ones from your brain. Now go sleep, I want to read.” I looked away from him, opening my book and pretending to read, away from him.

Five minutes passed, then ten, and fifteen, all of them in a deadly silence, almost awkward, until a chuckle split the atmosphere, making me turn around, looking at the man with a confused look.

“Usually, when people read, they turn the page after five minutes. What’s on your mind?” he asked, taking a strand of my hair and loosely twirling it with his finger. “..Well...You’re a stranger. And...We’ve only talked for a few hours. I know it makes no sense to ask this of you, but...I won’t be seeing you tomorrow anyway, so...Uhm...Do you think...I'm...Cold and mean...And unapproachable?” I mutter, looking away from him. “Not at all. I find you very endearing. The quiet ones are always the ones who have the best surprises once you get to know them. People deal with problems differently, it just takes the right person to want to understand you.” he kissed the strand of hair, making me bite my lip and turn off the lap light so my possibly pink cheeks won’t be noticeable. “Great. Thanks for the info. Now...How about you earn the money you got paid? You can do that by holding me and playing with my hair until I fall asleep.” I try to keep my voice from wavering. “You don’t have to put that pretext as a front, I would do that even if I wasn’t paid.” he chuckled lightly, holding me close to his chest, his fingers masterfully soothing my senses as he caressed by hair. “...Thanks.” I muttered, hiding my flustered face in his chest. “I have insomnia and general sleeping problems, including sleep paralysis and nightmares...And the only thing that used to be able to put me to sleep without waking up in the middle of the night would be mum holding me and playing with my hair until I fell asleep.” I confessed, my voice becoming softer and more emotional. “Thank you for trusting me with this precious memory, Y/N. It’s going to be okay. Now close your eyes...Sweet dreams, Y/N.” his peaceful, velvety voice was the last thing I heard before falling into a restful and calm sleep, for the first time in ages.

When morning came and I woke up, the bed was empty on the side that Worick was and I almost feared I imagined the whole thing...Until I noticed a piece of paper on the pillow where he slept.

“You’re a beautiful person, don’t let the darkness take over you. I hope to hear from you again, in the future, under better circumstances. ~ Worick”

To that, a phone number was written, and the first thing that came into my mind was to get that it tattooed on my body so I won’t lose it. Of course, that will never happen, so I’ll settle for writing it everywhere I can.

For some reason, I wanted to make him proud, and I still had no idea why, so I only called him once a year, on my birthday, and on that day, we would chat on the phone all night, in memory of that night. Finally leaving Ergastulum to go to University and get a better life for myself was something revolutionary for me, but after over 6 years, I managed to do just that. However, there was something that never left my brain, and that was the platinum haired man that completely changed the way I viewed life and how to approach it.

And I returned to Ergastulum after almost a decade.

I was dressed in a cute dress, and this time, unlike last time, a confident smile was on my face. Even though it’s fake, I adopted the “Fake it till you make it” motto, and nobody has to know about my problems.

I vibe.

Asking around for Worick, I find out he works as the Benriya with another man called Nicolas, who’s a tag, and even better, I got his address, so I knew just where to go.

As I entered the shabby apartment that was, for some reason, unlocked, I see a meek looking woman sitting on the couch, looking down.

“Did Worick get a girlfriend?” I leaned on the wall, a playful smirk on my face. “Wh-What?! G-Girlfriend?! W-Wait, who are you?!” she shot up to her feet, looking at me with big, blue doe eyes, frightened, might I say. “You’re adorable. What’s your name? And can I ask where Worick is? I’ve been told this is where he lives.” I played with a strand of my hair, trying not to intimidate the girl...Too much. “U-Uhm...He...He’s in his room...Who are you, miss?” she asked, trying to get some courage. “A friend, I’d like to think. From about ten years ago. Now, if you’ll excuse me...” I was ready to go look for him, only for a door to open, and the man in cause to appear, wearing only black boxers, and stretching...He obviously just woke up. “Ally? What’s all the noise?” he yawned loudly, rubbing his eyes. “Do you have a cute nickname for me too, Worick?” I smirked at him, as he widened his single eye, his jaw dropping in shock. “Y/N...?” he muttered my name, making me grin widely. “Glad you remember me. It has been quite a while since we’ve seen each other...And you age like fine wine, I’m telling you...You’re a sight for sore eyes.” he chuckled softly, only for him to come and pick me up, spinning a bit, before putting me down, cupping my face and kissing my forehead, leaving me a surprised and flustered mess. “And look at you! Can you get prettier than this? I told ya, you have a beautiful smile!” he grinned childishly, pinching my cheeks, making me yelp in pain and slap his hands away. “Jerk! That hurts! Ahem...Anyway, dear Gigolo, how are you? I heard some stuff about you working with someone named Nicolas...But I doubt her name is Nicolas.” I chuckled, pushing him softly away. “Oh, yes! Y/N, this is Alex, our new friend. You can say she’s kinda...Our secretary? I guess? Anyway, come over, we have a lot to catch up on!” he guided me to his bedroom that was, unsurprisingly, messy. “Wonderful and clean, just as expected. Have you ever thought of opening the window?” I teased him, plopping on his bed that was unexpectedly soft. “You, lazy little vixen...Here. I bought it years ago, after finishing the book you gave me, and I wanted to find out more. Now, I’m giving it to you. Are we even?” he smirked, handing me a copy of Fellowship of the Ring book. “We’d be even if I’d spend the night over as well. And if you gave me drinks and pizza. Basically a date. That will do.” I told him, looking dearly at the book I got gifted, although I already read it before. “My God, since when are you so bold?” he asked, getting on the bed, resting his chin on my knees, looking at me like a happy puppy. “Did you miss me, Worick? I hope you did, otherwise that little piece of paper you left would be incredibly disappointing and misleading.” I pointed out, booping his nose. “I’ve been thinking about you since then. By the looks of it, so did you. Are you sure you want a date with someone like me? You are beautiful, you are brilliant, your attitude in endearing as hell...And I’m still a Gigolo and my life is here, in Ergastulum. Don’t regret it later on.” he asked with a more serious tone, only for me to scoff and pull on his hair playfully. “I wouldn’t be here otherwise. Besides...Unlike you, I don’t need to be paid to spend quality time with you, doing nothing but chilling and chatting.” I teased him, making him laugh, as he plopped next to me, poking my cheek. “Great, problem solved! You’ve got yourself a parasite latching on you. Good luck getting rid of him now.” he grinned cheekily, only for me to cup his face and pull him into a kiss. “Why would I wanna get rid of a parasite this cute? Now shut up and hold me, it’s been ten years and I’m touch starved.” I grinned, nuzzling in the crook of his neck. “Damn, how I missed you.” he held me tightly to his chest, occasionally peppering my face with kisses.

It was definitely worth coming back to this God Forsaken place, even if it is for only one person. There’s place for everyone in this world, and in others’ hearts, and I found my place, in Worick’s warm arms, where I feel safest and most loved.

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bluemoose86 · 3 years

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Rating (Some) Openings of (Some) Anime I’ve Seen…Because I Can (pt. 1)

Hey all! My name is Moose, and just like the title says, I will be rating some of the openings for some of the anime I have seen! A few mandatory disclaimers, as always: these are all just my personal opinion, so please don’t take offense to any of my ratings or commentary. Second, for some of the longer anime on here, like Fairytail and Bleach, I will only be rating one or two of the openings in order to keep this list as short as possible. Without further ado, onto the list!

Soul Eater OP 1: “Resonance” by T.M.Revolution – 1000/10

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Naturally I had to start off with my favorite anime ever, Soul Eater. Although I love both of them, the first one will always be my favorite opening of any anime ever. It truly captures the premise of the show by showing the weapons transforming and how the weapon and meister teams work together. The fly-through of Death City in the beginning is iconic, and so is Lord Death’s little dance in the Death Room. I love the little domestic scene they put in with all the characters in Maka and Soul’s apartment, which does happen several times throughout the show. Foreshadowing Soul and Maka’s struggle with the black blood and the demon. Maka’s grigori soul makes a brief appearance. Overall it has a nice balance of showing the audience what to expect and hinting with the very brief appearances of the Kishin’s symbol that there is more going on than meets the eye. Not to mention the full song absolutely slaps.

Soul Eater OP 2: “Papermoon” by Tommy heavenly – 9/10

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Don’t get me wrong, the second opening is very good and I like it a lot, but it doesn’t hit quite as well as the first one for me. It’s a lot like other anime openings where there’s more abstract imagery that doesn’t necessarily happen/relate to the show very closely. There’s scenes of Maka and Soul in his scythe form falling into red water with purple roses on it; Tsubaki, Liz, and Patty having a “protagonist staring dramatically/worriedly into the sunset” moment; Soul holding an unconscious Maka over a symbol of the Kishin while screaming. There are some elements of things that happen in the show, but it feels less “grounded” than the first one does, if that makes sense. Also, there are a lot of “character flashes,” or moments when the screen is either cut into different panels that show several characters’ faces or shows a brief scene focusing on one or two characters. Lots of side characters become important in the second half of the show and it’s nice that they all get their due diligence, but it would be nice if they were shown actually doing something other than just looking at the camera. The opening is still good to watch though, and the song also slaps in this one.

Outlaw Star: “Through the Night” by Masahiko Arimatsu – 10/10

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Oh, Outlaw Star: an anime that had such promise yet couldn’t deliver. I did like this anime, but I wouldn’t necessarily recommend it to anyone for several reasons. It’s truly a show that I wish I had gotten more from–more character development, more exposition, more world-building, more episodes, more everything, really. Truthfully, the opening is probably the best thing about the show, and it’s certainly my favorite part. I’ve gone back and watched it on its own several times just because I like it so much. It’s definitely more abstract as well, but it fits very well with the open-ended adventure vibes from the show. In the first few episodes it definitely made me want to learn more about Aisha and Suzuka, two side characters who don’t become important until a bit later on. I also liked each character’s “picture” moment and felt they did a great job representing their personalities–Gene is a bit lazy and a “go-with-the-flow” kind of person; Melfina is, well, Melfina; Jim is more serious but can be funny and spends a lot of time with the ship’s computer, Giliam; Suzuka is calm and mysterious (and it’s a funny nod to the running gag of her always having a cup of tea with her whenever she sits down somewhere); Aisha is the strongest woman in the show and is very physical. On a somewhat unrelated note, I really like how the main cast of the show is mostly women (or equally men and women, if you count Giliam) as opposed to mostly men, especially since it’s a show from the 90s. And not all of them are attracted to the main character! In fact, Aisha and Suzuka have no romantic interest in him at all (and honestly it feels like Melfina doesn’t either for 90% of the show). Maybe I’ll make a separate post going into more detail about it. All in all, this is a really fun opening and I would definitely recommend watching it even if you’re not planning on watching the show. And once again the full version of the song is an absolute banger; I’ve had it on repeat lately and I will forever be salty that it’s not on Spotify.

Gensoumaden Saiyuki OP 1: “FOR REAL” by Hidenori Tokuyama – 10/10

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Saiyuki!! I’m not sure how prevalent it is on here since it’s an older anime that never quite made it to the “mainstream” spotlight, but I like it a lot! Especially the first anime series, Gensoumaden Saiyuki. Honestly, I don’t have a lot of deep reasons for ranking this one so high. I just think it’s really cool. The song is incredible and really fits the vibes of the show. I like the group shots of the characters. There are some interesting hints about the deeper story in the anime, though both the Gensoumaden openings are mostly abstract. Watching this opening and listening to the song has made me want to rewatch the show, so maybe I’ll do that after I finish this post. We’ll see!

Gensoumaden Saiyuki OP 2: “STILL TIME” by Tokuyama Hidenori – 8/10

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Like with Soul Eater, I like both openings, but I like the first one a bit more. The second opening doesn’t really correlate with the premise of the show; there’s a lot of (cool) shots of the characters in different outfits or lying/standing around dramatically, but not much that relates to the plot. I still don’t know for sure who the silhouette is when the boys are lying down in the middle of all those pillars. I think it’s Homura? But I’m not 100% certain. I like how it focuses a bit more on Goku, since the Homura arc revolves almost entirely around him, but otherwise it’s just not as good as the first one.

Apparently you can only upload 5 videos on a single post, so that’s where we’ll stop for now. In that case this will be a fairly lengthy series, so look for the next parts in the coming days. I hope you enjoyed! As always, much love and stay safe out there 💙

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i-need-entertainment · 3 years

Text

Just Right

Character: Chronostasis x short reader

*In this story the reader is about 5′0, Chrono is in the 5′9-6′0 range*

*DISCLAIMER, I will do my absolute best to portray a short reader but I can only be so accurate...since I myself am 5′9..BUT I love the idea and will do my best! Thank you to @goblinchild99 for requesting! I hope you enjoy it!!<3

TW- Mean words from dad, reader self doubts, mentions of insecurities

“Wait…what..?” Your heart shattered as you sat in front of your stone-faced parents. Your family was head of one of the many Yakuza of Japan, and your father was a cold and ruthless man not like your mother was much better. “You will be given to the Shie Hassaikai. What they do with you is none of my concern, but for our sake and for your own, behave. I know you are not wanted because of your…stature…but do not be a bother. I don’t want you being sent back h ere, I cannot imagine the shame you would bring to our name if you upset the new young leader.”

You held back tears at your father’s decree. ‘Given…? Is that all I’m good for… To be given as a peace treaty when one of my brothers makes a mistake… Why do I have to pay the price for their actions…why am I just being used as compensation?’ Quickly wiping the tear that fell you stood up and left the room, going to your room to pack since you’d be leaving that evening. You sat down on your bed, sobs racking your body as you clutched your small frame. Your whole life you had been treated as an outcast, as the disappointment of the family. All because…because what? Because you were shorter than most? Because you were more ‘petite’? Just because you were small it didn’t make you any less important…any less deserving of love and affection. Instead you were being bargained off for ‘peace’. The sadness you felt was replaced by frustration. You angrily took out a suitcase and filled it with clothes, precious items, and whatever toiletries you knew you’d need. Without saying a word you rolled your suitcase out of your room, where an underling of some sort took it from your, and made your way to your parents. “Goodbye mom…dad…I wish you both the best.” You hugged your mom while your dad gave you a nod. “Make us proud, Y/n.” You held back your tears at your dad’s heartless reply and instead chose to nod, walking out the door and never looking back. After a good 2 ½ hour drive you made it to your new home, the Shie Hassaikai Headquarters. Where you would spend the rest of your life…Now anyone in your position would probably assume the worst..especially being a small female. But you were more afraid of being killed than…that. I mean, Overhaul was a major germaphobe so that stilled some worries you supposed…The car stopped and you shook yourself from your daydreams. Unbuckling your seat belt you exited the car, thanked the driver and made your way to the front gate. There to greet you was a man, who was much taller than you, wearing a white raincoat that reached just below his knees with black shiny boots. But the things that stood out to you the most was the hood he had covering his head, and the mask that covered his face. “Y/n L/n?” You looked up to the man, meekly nodding. He waved over one of the other masked associates, this time a man with a black mask, coat and hat to get your bag. The man in the white coat turned towards you. You couldn’t see his eyes but you could feel them burning holes through you. “Follow me, Overhaul would like to meet you.” You nodded, “But, put this on first…and don’t touch him, I imagine you wouldn’t like to die on your first day here.” You stilled as you shakily took the white medical mask and put it on, clasping your shaking hands together as you followed behind the strangely dressed man. “You don’t talk much…do you?” You looked up as you walked through the dim hallways of the Shie Hassaikai basement. “No…not to strangers, anyway…” You tried your best to sound normal, but you couldn’t deny you were scared. And rightfully so! “Yeah, well that might actually do you well here, you’re less likely to tick him off then.” You made a sound to let him know you understood, still not feeling well enough to answer him with a real response just yet. The two of you stopped at a door. Being raised in a Yakuza family you were no stranger to scary encounters, but this would be the scariest you’ve ever faced by far. Let alone faced by yourself. The man, who you had to have learned his name knocked on the door, answering that ‘L/n was there’ before the boss man told him (and you) to enter. Entering the office you were ushered over to the couch to sit down. So now here you were sitting directly across from a man that could kill you with a single touch. “L/n, I’m sure you know who I am, yes?” You nodded your head, looking down with your hands crossed in your lap. Overhaul may not have been the biggest guy, but he was still easily almost a foot taller than you…not to mention he had a fairly big build. “I won’t lie to you, I wasn’t fond of your fathers implications of why he was sending you here, but I assure you I have no intentions of following through with his original plans.” Your head shot up at this. “You may be small in stature, and it’s true that could be a weakness, but you also have a strong quirk. I’m offering you a place here, amongst me and the precepts…not everyone gets that opportunity. Should you choose to take it you will be taken care of, and your abilities will be praised.” You felt like you could cry, not from fear, but from being…wanted. “So? Will you join the Hassaikai, not as whatever it was your father wanted, but as apart of it?” Your face took on a determined look, “…I’ll do it. I know I’m not the strongest, and I’m not very strong, but I promise to do my best. Thank you..” Overhaul’s expression changed to a happy one. “Wonderful, I am aware of your inability to fight or defend yourself, so I’m putting you directly under Chronostasis,” He motioned for the said man to step forward. “Chrono, become acquainted with her, show her the ropes, teach her to fight, and utilize her natural abilities. Consider her your…assistant for now. Understood?” Chronostasis as you had learned his name was nodded, “Yes sir, come on L/n, I’ll show you around the base.” You nodded, standing up you bowed, “Thank you for this opportunity, I’ll do my best.” Overhaul nodded, walking passed you to his desk. “The pleasure is mine. You both are dismissed.” With that the two of you left the room and started navigating the hallways. “I’ll show you around first before getting started on what you’ll be doing here if that’s okay with you.” You nodded, “That’s fine.” You started walking, while you were talking he showed you the different rooms, which ones to avoid and which ones you’d be spending a lot of time in. “This is my office, which will be yours now too I guess.” He opened the door and stepped in. You didn’t follow. “…I’m sorry…” He turned around, “For what?” You nervously looked down, hands wringing together. “For being a burden…” He sighed, lightly guiding you into the room. “Listen, you’re not a burden, in all seriousness I could use the help, Overhaul gives me too much as it is anyways. And…I have a pretty good idea of how you were treated at your family’s Yakuza, and it kinda ticks me off. So I assure you, you’re not a bother.” You smiled at him, “Thank you…” “Yup.” He shut the door and sat down at his desk, motioning for you to do the same at the couch in the room. Without warning, he removed the mask he had on, the hood falling to his shoulders as he did so. “You can go ahead and take the mask off, I don’t wear mine when I’m not around Overhaul and he doesn’t care as long as you’re not interacting with him.” You sheepishly nodded, desperately trying to hide how flustered you were, because he was attractive. Not just the ‘oh yeah, he's good looking’ kind, more like the ‘Oh my gosh, I think I JUST DIED ‘ kind. He had the perfect proportions of traditional attractiveness and uniqueness to make him that much more appealing to you. He had sharp narrow dark gray-blue eyes, a jawline that could draw blood and a general intensity about him that made your heart stop beating. Remembering you were probably staring you quickly looked away. But something else about him caught your eye…his hair. It was a white silvery color, and medium in length, but as you examined him further you noticed the ends of his hair ended in arrow shapes. “Is that part of your quirk?” His dark eyes met yours, he figured you’d ask, most anyone who had ever seen him asked sooner or later. But when he looked at you, you weren’t looking at him like he was a freak. Your eyes held an innocent and honest curiosity. With no malice to be seen. “I’m sorry if that came off as weird or rude!! It’s just…I’ve never seen anything like it…” He nodded, “It’s fine, I kinda figured you would. My quirk is called Chronostasis. I can extend these clock needle things to pierce someone, but I need to be extremely still. If I do pierce someone I can slow them down, but the length depends on which hand I struck them with. If I use the minute,” He pointed to one of the ‘clock needles’ on the end of his hair, “They’re slowed for a minute, same thing if I use the hour.” He looked at you, noticing your expression. “I know it’s weird but-“ “I don’t think it’s weird.” He looked at you in shock, “You don’t? You can be honest, it’s pretty weird.” You shook your head, that honest and sincere glint never leaving your e/c eyes. “I think they’re really cool…beautiful…even..” In his 22 years of life, no one had ever told him his quirk was cool, let alone beautiful. If words could kill, Chronostasis would probably be dead. The red tint on his cheeks giving aware his flusteredness. “A-Uh..Thanks…What’s your quirk anyway?” “It’s called Seamless…Um basically I can sew without using needles, controlling the threads and what not…but it only works on sewing things, I can’t use it on people or anything..” You looked up, expecting him to be bored only to see interest gleaming in his eyes. “Sounds cool to me, useful too.” Never in your life had you felt so secure, safe, appreciated…it felt good. It felt good to know there were people out there who wanted you, even if it was just for work it still felt nice. Fast forward a bit, you’ve been with the Hassaikai for a year now. You had cemented your place here, and you felt great. You didn’t use your quirk too much, but you did save them a lot of money on clothes. You had also become a lot closer to Chrono, or Kurono Hari as you had learned his name was, and called him in private. You talked a lot, ranting to each other about your problems, spending time together even if it was just doing your own things in silent. It was safe to say the two of you had become good friends, but more than that you had developed feelings for the man. That was why you were on your current mission, making your way to Overhaul’s office. You knocked, and after hearing a ‘come in’ entered. He was sitting at his desk, fiddling with papers and what not. “Ah, L/n, what can I help you with?” You walked to stand in front of his desk, nervously messing with your fingers and fidgeting. “…I came to ask you something…” Overhaul sighed as he set his pen down, leaning to place his chin in his hand, which was propped up on his desk. “Oh? What is it? I take it everything is going fine?” Over the past year besides getting close to Chronostasis, you had also gotten close to Overhaul. Although you noticed he acted very protective of you, like an older brother. You had asked him about it a few months ago, he had simply told you he had met with your father a few years ago when he accompanied a business meeting with Pops. He had seen how you were treated and it made him sick especially because of how much potential you showed. In his own special way, you knew he cared somewhat about you. You nodded your head. “Everything’s fine, great, actually…I need to talk to you about something else…someone else….”. His eyebrow raised in interest, he pretended to act surprised but he had an inkling of why you were really here. “I want your permission to…to…” You opened your mouth to speak but ultimately chose to close it, not really knowing how to go forward. He sighed again, leaning back in his chair while his hands clasped together, resting by his mouth. “Let me guess…you’d like my permission to pursue a relationship with Chronostasis? Am I correct?” You felt heat raise to your face as you stiffened. ‘How did he…?’ “I may seclude myself to this office and limit my interactions with people to a minimum, but I’m not blind. I am well aware of he feelings the both of you have for each other.” You gulped, here it comes…”I don’t care, just don’t let it get in the way of your work. But if it ends the pitiful gazes and flirting between the two of you, by all means, get married for all I care.” Your eyes widened as your brain proceeded to implode. “A-are you sure?! You really don’t mind?!” He looked at you in disbelief before shrugging. “Nope, just don’t do any of that lovey-dovey stuff around me, affection like that makes me nauseas.” You nodded, “I promise.” He nodded and got up, walking you to the door. “…I’m trusting you won’t tell him what I’m about to say but, take care of him…He’s stupidly in love with you, so I know he’ll take care of you, but please be good to him…” You smiled, nodding your head. “I will…wait, did you say he’s in lo-“ “Time for you to go, goodbye L/n.” Before you could refute, he pushed you out of the room, shut the door and locked it. Sighing, you made you way to your and Chrono’s office, finally ready to tell the man of your dreams your feelings. To most you may be considered ‘short’ or ‘small’, and to some they might even think of you as ‘inadequate’ or ‘lesser’ than them. At one point you probably thought Chrono felt that way. (but as you were soon about to find out)But to Chrono? You were just right, just...perfect.

#chronostasis x reader #chrono x reader #chrono #chronostasis #bnha x reader #BNHA #bnha fanfiction #bnha villains #shie hassaikai #y/n #angst #requests

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vaguely-concerned · 3 years

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Any tips for a TF POV fic? I want to write one because I too went through a time in my life when I let feelings bounce off cuz that was easier, but I feel like that's not quite on point for him 🤔

God I have SO MANY THOUGHTS about this and they’re all so wordless and frustratingly evasive to me yet (I am in the process of writing a looooooong T.F. POV fic and it gives me much more trouble than Graves POV, probably because as a person I’m quite a lot more like the T.F. Type in real life lol). But yes, here we go, let me try to express some of what I personally try to have as my hm ‘anchor points’ for his perspective. (Heavy disclaimer that these are just my personal & disorganized little musings and by no means the only or ‘correct’ way to read the character!)

- First of all I agree, the image of ‘bouncing off’ doesn’t feel quiteright -- it’s in the right neighbourhood but the wrong address sort of thing, but it’s really hard to come up with a way to explain how I feel the nuance here.

*insert three hours later spongebob meme here* Okay, so the metaphor I came up with is: T.F.’s relationship to emotions is a direct parallel to his relationship to water/the ocean: it’s scary down there, it’s dark, it’s dangerous, and if he should ever be dumb enough to try to go in too deep it’ll kill him dead because boy oh boy on so many levels this man just did not learn how to swim. As far as he’s concerned any sensible person would simply bob along on the surface in a sturdily built boat and try not to think too much about the weird shit that lives down there in the depths. (In this metaphor the layer of artifice and performance so habitual it’s basically integrated into the fabric of his soul is the boat. Y’know, the part that’s Twisted Fate and not just plain ol’ Tobias. I’ll hasten to add that I think both parts of his identity are equally ‘real’ and equally him, but the Twisted Fate part is like… protecting the Tobias part. Keeping him from drowning, as it were. I’m not sure he’d think of it like that himself for the longest time, though, I suspect he has more of a ‘that man is dead’ attitude towards the Tobias part after Graves is gone)

I think what I’m trying to get at is the idea that to him, raw emotion is as hostile and unknowable and unnavigable an ‘environment’ as the deep ocean. (And the only time we see him willingly go there, physically and otherwise, is for Graves, so you know let’s jot that down first of all lol.)

- He seems to genuinely quite like and be interested in people – how they think, what moves and motivates them, their secrets and foibles. So I tend to try to keep the uh ‘detail work’ in his POV focused in that direction. Priority going like 1) people 2) people’s valuables 3) the relative availability of people’s valuables at this moment if you have clever hands and a very charming smile haha

- One of my favourite things about T.F. is that he seems, I don’t know… quite genuinely good-natured beneath it all? If you back him into a corner some sharp and dangerous things peek out (he has survived in his line of heh ‘business’ for like thirty years, and a lot of it on his own), but for the most part and when unthreatened he has a sort of mildly amused and intrigued live-and-let-live attitude to the world even as he’s conning it that I find deeply charming. Which to me ties in with:

- T.F.’s first instinctive reaction to danger (perceived or real) the majority of the time seems to be ‘Flight’. Confrontation and violence are basically his ‘when literally everything else has failed’ options. (As seen prominently in Burning Tides, where he just keeps running and running and the only time he actually starts throwing punches is when he has to because Graves is in immediate danger and they’re backed into a corner. Which feels like it means something huh lol, I often think about what could actually make T.F. angry enough that he would openly express it and that seems to be the most likely angle for it in my eyes.)

- My take on one of the fundamental differences between Graves and T.F. is that Graves has A LOT of feelings but doesn’t quite know it (or more like can’t quite conceptualize it I should say) – he has a hard time identifying or finding vocabulary for feelings that aren’t some shade of anger. Meanwhile T.F. KNOWS he has feelings, he just doesn’t like it, ardently wishes he didn’t, and will do pretty much anything to run away and not have to engage with them haha.

Another important difference: when brought out of equilibrium Graves gets angry, and T.F. gets scared. I have the feeling that beneath it all he’s scared a lot, and it’s why his persona is so oriented towards gaining control in ways where people don’t realize it enough to even think try to take that control away from him until he’s already long gone. Misdirection as a way of life babEY

- This might be too deep in the ‘my WIP/process specific’ territory to really count as general analysis, but I think it’s there in canon too – there’s almost a feeling that he implicitly feels like he has to make up for some fundamental flaw or lack he has at the core? (Not a weird thing for him to end up feeling, considering what happened to him as a kid.) All the rest of him, all the cleverness and style and charm, is there to ‘make up’ for how at the end of the day he’s… wrong somehow. As Graves, who knows him better than anyone, focuses right in on, a coward. And that is CERTAINLY not the whole truth and even Graves in a full rage relents when he sees the effect the accusation has on him and once he gets the actual facts of what happened. But I think that sense of deep unworthiness is what’s stuck with him emotionally. His people left him because there’s something fundamentally lacking and immoral about him. He lost Graves because he’s not good enough, because he’s a coward who leaves people behind. He deserves to be alone. Mix in a ton of survivor’s guilt to taste, and I think you have the like… core emotional wound he’s constructed around.

There’s also something here about fear of profound powerlessness specifically in situations where words, generally his strongest card that’s not a literal card (har har har oh we do have fun here), simply don’t work right at the moment when he needs them to the most – he tried to beg for his people not to leave him behind, he tried to convince Graves to get the hell out with the rest of the crew… and it didn’t work. (In Burning Tides you see he’s given up even trying to explain himself, he just wants Out in whatever way leaves both him and Graves tolerably in one piece, even if he won’t be understood or heard or less alone afterwards. It takes him until like half way through the entire chase to even THINK about just telling Graves the truth. In all fairness to T.F. it probably wouldn’t have worked at that moment, but it does vaguely crack me up that he didn’t even consider it until all of Bilgewater harbor was already burning merrily behind them fhsajkfa)

- He has a little bit of a (perfectly justified considering his background honestly) chip on his shoulder, especially when it comes to powerful or arrogant people. There seems to be a special satisfaction in outsmarting and robbing specifically rich assholes (which would also be the people who have the most to steal, so y’know good times all round). From his short stories and few places in his bio you almost get the feeling that he has a funny sort of Robin Hood-esque sense of lopsided justice about it. (Robin Hood-esque only so far as to define ‘the poor’ as the eternally hard-strapped ‘T.F. & Graves Waistcoats and Cigars Fund’, of course lol)

I think T.F. both has a mind that tends more towards analyzing the big picture and also has more direct experience with like… structural/systemic powerlessness and oppression. So the cons they pull are probably partly how he channels the emotions that arise out of that (and the rest he just represses, like the relatable guy he is haha)

- Graves being back would cause some IMMENSE internal conflict in him, I feel – of course all the feelings of relief and attachment and love, but also… so much of who he is now came about specifically to find a way to deal with Graves being gone, with seemingly just shutting down the entirety of his need for real human companionship or closeness for like a decade, things that are suddenly starting to be brought online again and must be tremendously stressful to deal with when you’ve had it completely suppressed and deadened for so long. He’s put so much into trying to be fundamentally unattached to anything, anywhere, anyone (and there are some things here about perpetually being an outsider his whole life that I can’t quite put into words, but that’s a dimension too.) That sort of psychological self defense mechanism doesn’t just contentedly nod its head and go away just because something good happened one time haha. Probably a work in progress there huh (at least he’s not alone in it now <3)

PLUS some bonus Graves POV observations because man. I love writing him, he’s just a marvel of a man

- I know I call him a dumbass all the time, but in a street smart way I think he’s actually quite clever haha, he just has a bad tendency to get hung up on an idea and get tunnel sight. (I’ve based this a lot on the short stories but see also more recently his Sentinel skin voice lines for good examples: he’s incredibly straightforward in that ‘well obviously if it doesn’t affect me personally I ain’t gonna give it that much thought’ way, but you also have glimpses of surprising insight/shrewdness and… I don’t quite know how to put it, but something like an ability to get to the bottom line of something without getting caught up in the details. (I suspect T.F. does find himself lost in the details quite frequently, he’s much more attached to the decorative curlicues of the world.) Graves clearly & frequently has no idea what’s going on, but he strips things down to the essentials very quick: Lucian’s story as a direct thematic mirror to Viego’s, Is There A Sun Lady – Oh, I See, all of this is weird and creepy and needs shooting, and maybe most crucial of all: Isolde doesn’t want to be with her husband anymore so what he’s doing is just like. Extra shitty. He gets what he needs to get and then just barges ahead heedlessly with that. Icon.)

- He’s actually pretty darn eloquent in a gruff sort of way and uses some quite sophisticated vocabulary! And the way this is contrasted with the tendency to slip into blunter coarser language just as readily -- like when he takes the time to describe the monster that takes down the Prince’s ship in such poetic terms as ‘gargantuan’ and ‘the behemoth’s immense, distended jaw’ and it having ‘pallid dead eyes the size of the moon’, and meanwhile during his swim at the beginning of the story we get bastard cold and bastard dark and full of bastard jellyfish and crabs – brings me such immense and unending delight

- He’s more eloquent in his internal voice than he is when speaking (especially noticeable in Destiny and Fate; he does have a tendency to fumble his words when talking lol), and he gets quite easily lost in his own meandering reflective musings in a way I find incredibly endearing. I’d almost call it whimsical at times, honestly, hilarious as that is? Like when he’s literally so absorbed in a line of thought he forgets which way they’re rowing and T.F. has to remind him. (I think T.F. generally has more of a grip of what’s going on around them than Graves does lol)

- There’s an important distinction to be made that Graves actually does, by and large, read T.F: very closely and seemingly also pretty damn accurately. He’s good at (and clearly very interested in) reading his moods, spotting what tactics he’s using interpersonally, when he’s being genuine and when he’s being dissembling.

What Graves is actually bad at is understanding his own emotions, and to not bleed those emotions into other people’s motivations and behavior, especially when he’s upset or in heightened states of feeling, like he is all the way through Burning Tides. He can only name his own feelings in a vocabulary of anger, when it’s pretty clear from the subtext that there’s a whole bunch of other stuff going on there, and he has incredible trouble divorcing those feelings from what other people’s got going on with them right then. He feels hurt, betrayed, and undone by everything that’s happened to him, so the intention to hurt, betray and undo must live in the other person who he feels caused it. In less drastic cases you see him do this a bit when he feels like T.F. is being evasive with him – taking it as a form of rejection rather than realizing T.F. is just lost in his own thoughts, sort of thing. There’s a real improvement in this one between Burning Tides and Destiny and Fate, though, so maybe he’ll have an easier time of it with some time and practice.

Sorry it took so long to get back to you on this and that it’s a bit of a rambling mess, words have been real hard recently. Or rather I have too many words, all the time, left and right, I just can’t put them into the right orders to make any sense hahaha, I hope there’s some useful point in this somewhere for you at least!

#hopefully this makes some kind of sense my brain is in... a state but it was actually really nice to just focus on some character analysis!#tf x graves #league of legends #twisted fate

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wrenhyperfixates · 3 years

Text

Of All the Places

Chapter 8

Pairing: Loki x reader Series Summary: Washing up in a small town in Oklahoma was definitely not part of Loki’s plan when he came to conquer Midgard. There is one good thing about it, though: No one recognizes him as the one who just wreaked havoc in New York. So, Loki plans to recover from the battle and move on with his life. The only problem? He’s not sure he can leave you. Chapter Summary: The town comes together to help a family hit particularly bad by the tornado. A conversation with you helps Loki come to a decision. Chapter Warnings: a lot of mutual pining A/N: I’m really excited about this story now. There’s some great things coming up! Any predictions about where I’m going with this? I’d love to hear them! Updates every Friday. Enjoy :)

Tag List: @lucywrites02 @frostedgiant @lunarmoon8 @twhiddlestonsstuff @marvelousdaydreams @parkastoria @lokistan

✥ Start at Beginning ✥ | ← Previous Chapter | Next Chapter →

Disclaimer: Gif not mine

You and your family had been pretty lucky in the aftermath of the tornado, but unfortunately the same could not be said for your neighbors. The family at the next farm over, the Campbells, whole barn had been blown away. Thankfully, they didn’t suffer any physical injuries, but the wound to their bank account had been decent. That’s why a bunch of people from town were pitching in to help them. In fact, they were preparing for a barn raising at the very minute, something Loki had never even imagined existed before. Actually, the whole idea of a close-knit community like this had never really occurred to him. When he was young, he wasn’t really allowed out into the streets of Asgard, and when he was old enough to decide that for himself, he’d lost his interest.

“You ready, son?” Papa asked, clapping Loki on the back.

“Indeed,” he replied, putting his hair in a low bun to keep it out of his face during the work. “Would it be odd if I said I was a little excited?”

“It is surprisingly fun,” John laughed. “But we’re actually supposed to be trying to talk you out this. You still need to take it easy. ‘Doctor’s orders.’”

He nodded in your direction where you were talking with your friends. Even though you seemed happy, you kept throwing little worried glances at Loki. The whole ordeal with tornado was nearly a week ago, but it seemed to have made you nervous for Loki’s health again. He would have thought that his agility and speed would have reassured you, but it actually did the opposite. You kept insisting that he may have re-injured something and not even noticed. You sent another nervous look his way, but your gaze lingered a little longer, noticing his hairstyle. Half the reason he ever wore it this way was because of how much you obviously liked it.

Mr. and Mrs. Campbell made a little speech thanking everyone for coming out, and then the work began. It was slow moving at first, what with having to get the main supports up soundly and all, but soon the pace picked up. By the time they were working on the roof, Loki could feel the energy of the mortals around him had dropped considerably. Being the god that he was, though, he was tireless enough to finish the barn on his own. Of course, he couldn’t tell anyone that, especially when Papa kept insisting he take a break.

All the girls, and a few guys too, were marveling over Loki’s uncanny strength. He was by no means the most ripped man there, but he was certainly the strongest. Everyone was impressed by just how much he could lift, and he delighted in the general shock the crowd had. And now that he’d shown just how strong he was, people had certainly started paying attention to his muscles, which were there, mind you, but just too lean to notice at first glance. He didn’t much care for any of those stares, though, unless they coming from you. Alas, you’d left a little while ago to help Ana with Matt. Now, however, you were coming back, and Loki redoubled his efforts to show off. Especially because it seemed that Denzel had the same idea. Loki couldn’t even think that man’s name without rolling his eyes.

“Hey,” you said, walking up to Loki and offering him some trail mix, a Midgardian snack he was surprisingly fond of. “I thought you might need some refreshments. Have you eaten anything all day?”

“Do not worry. I have been taking care of myself,” he replied, setting down a pile of wood. “Still, you have my thanks, darling.”

“No problem.” You looked down at your feet as you kicked a rock, building up the confidence to say your next sentence. “I, uh, I really like your hair like that, by the way. It looks good.”

Loki’s face took a crimson shade yet again, and he couldn’t help but smile. The effect you had on him always made him feel a wild mix of emotions. On the one hand, the reaction bothered him to no end. On the other, he was just used to it at his point.

“Is that so,” he said as if he hadn’t already figured it out. “Perhaps I should wear it this way more often then.”

“Oh! You don’t have to. I mean, of course you can if you want to. But I didn’t mean that you had to or anything. Wear it how you like it.” He smirked at your flustered babbling. “Ana, Matt! Can we have some of that water?”

He chuckled at how you had to call them over to save you from your embarrassment, something he found rather adorable. Now that he’d admitted his feelings to himself, he kept finding little things about you to obsess over. Today, it was apparently how cute you are when you’re nervous.

“You really should drink more, being out in the heat all day like this,” you told him, going back into doctor mode.

“What would I do without you,” he teased.

“Loki!” Matt cheered upon reaching him. “I wanna help build too!”

“Now, now Matt. What did mommy say?” Ana asked the boy.

“Mommy said no,” he replied with a little frown. “But Loki didn’t say no!”

“I am sorry, little one. You must listen to your mother,” Loki said, picking the child up. “One day when you are bigger and stronger you will get to help.”

“But will you still be here, Loki?”

The boy’s question gave him a pause. Would he still be there? Did he want to be? It was impossible to answer that first question, considering he couldn’t see the future. Plus, he was in constant danger of being found out and having to run. But that second question he knew the answer to. Something about this small town had charmed him, and being asked right now, he would say he never wanted to leave. He wondered if he would always feel that way, though. Looking into your eyes, he was pretty sure he would.

“I truly do not know, but I would very much like to be.”

“Yay!” Matt exclaimed, throwing his tiny arms around Loki.

Ana chuckled at the child’s excitement while you smiled warmly at Loki. Even though he’d already told you how he felt about this place, your eyes went wide at the fact he’d so boldly declare it to everyone. He only wished he could be so bold when it came to declaring his feelings for you.

Soon, he was back at work helping to build the barn. Unfortunately, John and Papa were up on the roof, and Loki knew very few other people there. So, when Denzel struck up a conversation with him, there was nothing he could do to avoid it.

“So,” Denzel said, “You been seeing a doctor about this memory loss of yours. ‘Cause, I don’t know if I’ve mentioned, but I’m a-”

“Doctor,” Loki cut him off, gritting his teeth. “Yes, I know. It has been mentioned. Several times. But what kind of doctor, may I ask?”

“Well,” he said, clearing his throat, “I’m a pediatrician.”

“I see. A noble profession, indeed. Though I am guessing you are not the best equipped to handle my amnesia, hmm?”

“No, I guess not. But I could definitely recommend someone.”

“I do appreciate it,” Loki confessed, though he suspected there were underlying reasons for Denzel’s concern. Namely, having Loki out of the way so he could get to you easier. “But everything is alright for now. I shall let you know if the situation changes.”

“Ok then.”

They lapsed into silence as they picked up more wood for construction, Denzel seeming a little shocked by just how much Loki was able to carry. Which definitely wasn’t even more than he had previously been taking just to intimidate the man.

“Hey, listen,” Denzel said while they helped work to make the walls, nodding in your direction. “Guy to guy, have they mentioned me at all?”

“Yes, as a matter of fact they have. I do not think you will like it, though.”

“That bad, huh?”

“I am afraid so.”

“Well, I guess that just means I’ve gotta work twice as hard to show them how serious I am about wanting them back.”

“Yes, I do suppose- Wait! No,” Loki said, not having expected that to be his answer. “I do not think that is in your best interest.”

“Oh, really? Are you sure you don’t think it’s in your best interest?”

“I do not know what you are talking about.”

“So then you’re fine with me asking them out?”

“Only if you are fine with being rejected.”

They stood glaring at each other until they were able to move to work on separate sections. Loki was desperately trying to not feel so jealous and anxious. After all, you’d explicitly said that you did not want to be with Denzel, but there was still that little bit of uncertainty. Perhaps you’d changed your mind and decided to give him a second chance.

“You alright there, son?” Papa asked, coming down from the roof.

“You better not pass out,” John added, following close behind. “You know we’re going to be the ones who get in trouble if you do.”

“I assure you, I am fine,” Loki replied, trying not to sound too sad. He was failing. “You need not worry.”

“Oh, I bet I know what this is about. I saw you talking with Denzel.”

“No, nope,” Loki shushed, putting up a finger. “Go no further, please.”

“Ok, fine, whatever you say. Just thought you might want to know that the Campbell’s are planning a little thank you party tonight. It would be the perfect chance to tell a certain someone how you feel.”

“Reckon you ever went to a barn dance in your past life?” Papa asked.

Loki’s eyebrows knit together in confusion. He’d never heard of anything like it on Asgard, though he could fathom what it was due to the rather self-explanatory name. It was a thrilling prospect to go to it, considering he’d only ever been to uptight, boring balls. As a child, he’d stir up some mischief to make things more interesting, but he’d always get a serious scolding from his father. Not to mention Thor was the center of attention more often than not.

“I do not believe I would have, though I am looking forward to the opportunity now,” Loki shared as they set back work again.

The rest of the day went much the same, and though he didn’t get to spend as much time with you as he would have liked, Loki had quite a bit of fun with John and Papa. His attachment to you all was rather dangerous, as was the fact that he cared it was. At least he was able to mask his emotions, much like he was so adept at doing before this whole ordeal.

By dinnertime, the barn was completed and only a select few remained to help set up for the party. Your family, however, went the short distance back home to freshen up after helping out all day. Well, Matt didn’t help much. Instead he just romped and played, though it could be argued he helped by brightening everyone’s day. Regardless, after changing your clothes you were all ready to set out again. Loki did a double take as he walked out onto the porch; you looked more beautiful than ever before. He always thought you looked amazing, but standing there in the fading light of day, it struck him anew.

“You know, Loki,” John said, putting his hands on the god’s shoulders and speaking low enough that you couldn’t hear him. “A friendly word of advice, you should just go for it.”

“But-”

“No more ‘buts’ mister,” Ana reprimanded as she walked up and passed her son to her husband. “I don’t know who you think you’re fooling, but you two need to stop being oblivious dorks and make a move already. No offense.”

“None taken, I suppose,” he said, though it wasn’t wholly true. Him an oblivious dork? Nonsense, not the God of Mischief. “Though I still must insist that I do not know to what any of you are referring. Hypothetically, if I did, do you really believe I have a chance?”

“Yes. And a very good one at that.”

They left Loki mull over his thoughts. When they passed you, you finally turned around and saw Loki standing there, his now loose hair slightly wavy from having been up all day. He was frozen like stone under your tender gaze, afraid of his emotions and unable to take what Ana and John had said to heart. It wasn’t until your smile faltered a little at his expressionless trance that he was able to move out of the doorway.

“My darling, I hope you know how radiant you look this evening,” he told you, a light blush coating his cheeks, still so pale even after so many days out in the sun.

“It’s nothing special, really,” you said with a nervous laugh. “But thank you all the same.”

“My pleasure.”

His fingers brushed against yours and on instinct you intertwined them. He brought your hand to his mouth, lips ghosting over your knuckles, reminding him of that day when he apologized to you. He’d performed the same action back then. With time and perspective, he realized that was the day he was pushed completely off the edge and into love with you. You took a step closer, your bodies nearly pressed against each other. The warmth radiating off of you gave the frost giant a pause, your hands still clasped together, now semi-awkwardly hovering near his head.

“Hey Loki,” you began as he quirked an eyebrow to urge you on. You took a deep breath, gathering your courage and leaning in. “I... I... I-”

“I suppose we should be on our way now,” Mama announced, coming out of the house.

You sheepishly broke apart and agreed with her, your small group heading over to your neighbor’s. Upon arrival, Loki noted how it was even more lively than earlier, which was really saying something. It seemed that everyone who came by during the day to help with the build was back now, and the whole place was a hubbub of activity. Your friends were quick to whisk you away into the thick of it, and seeing as how everyone else had left before you, Loki was now left alone with Mama.

“You can go if you want,” she said. “I’m not much for crowds.”

“I must confess, I am not either.”

“I see.”

Despite having come to some kind of agreement, the air between them was still tense. The past week had been filled with a lot of throat clearing and stiff conversation. Somehow, he preferred the snippy and snide remarks from the woman. They were, at least, a lot less gawky than what their interactions were now. Thankfully, they were saved from the stilted small talk by food. As it turned out, they were both quite a fan of apple pie, and Mrs. Campbell made a mighty good one.

Eventually, Papa sought them out in the crowd and did a bit of a double take to see them amicably chatting. He ushered them inside to where you and the rest of your family were standing just as the dancing was about to begin.

“Pardon me, darlin’,” Denzel said, tapping you on the shoulder. He bowed down a little and put out his hand as Loki rolled his eyes. “May I have this dance?”

“Oh! I would love to, really, but I already promised Loki,” you said turning to him. “Shall we then?”

“We shall,” Loki replied, beaming.

Of course, the two of you had not planned on dancing together, but he was preening under the lie you’d told to your ex. The fact that you chose him completely unprompted made his heart grow wings and soar above the clouds. As for the dance, it was easy enough to follow the caller’s directions. This was the first time Loki had ever danced so causally, but his nimble feet, which were much more accustomed to waltzes and other Asgardian dances, were able to catch on rather quickly. It didn’t take him long to determine the square dance was his favorite one of the night.

After a couple more hours of dancing and avoiding Denzel, you and Loki snuck off, not before making a quick stop to thank your hosts, of course. The two of you went to your own family’s barn and climbed up to the loft, settling down in the plushy blankets and pillows you kept up there for chilly nights such as this. The conversation stayed light for a while, but it inevitably took a turn toward more serious topics.

“I was asking around today,” you said. “I’m so sorry, Loki, but no one had any clue who you were.”

“It is ok, do not concern yourself with this. If I did not know any better, I would say you were trying to get rid of me.”

“I’m really not, I swear,” you said, chewing your bottom lip, though Loki had been fully teasing. “No one is anymore, really.”

“Are you sure about that?” he inquired, thinking of Denzel.

“Why did someone say something to you?”

“No. It is like I said, do not worry.”

You hummed in acknowledgement as you snuggled further into his side, desperate to keep the cold away. He put his arms around you and squeezed you tighter, saying a little heating enchantment in his head.

“You know, I think James would’ve liked you,” you decided, eyelids beginning to droop.

“Perhaps. But...”

“Yes?”

“But there is still so much we do not know about me. What if have done something terrible?”

“While I’m sure you haven’t, let’s say you did do something you’re not proud of,” you indulged him. “The only thing stopping us from having a present we can enjoy and a future we can love, is a past we can’t forget.”

“Well, I do not remember, anyway. But what if it is really bad?”

“All I mean is, you have to be able to forgive. To let go.”

He could hear in your tone that you were thinking of your brother. As much as he did not want to admit it, Loki would have been upset had Thor died. He could only imagine the pain you felt when you’d heard the news. But he supposed you were able to forgive whoever it was whose irresponsibility had led to James’s death. It was yet another thing to admire about you, for sure.

“I suppose you are right.”

“Yeah, I am,” you agreed, finally letting your tired head drop and nuzzling into his shoulder.

He brought you down to a more comfortable position, laying down with your head on his chest, letting his heart beat wildly in your ear. Lying awake, he thought back to what he’d said earlier about wanting to stay forever. Lingering in the back of his mind was always the knowledge that he most likely would not be able to. If he were, though, would he still want to? A large part of himself still wanted to loathe the domestic simplicity of this life. In a way, being so far removed from everything, living high up in palace towers, was easier. Still, he could not find it in himself to dislike this quaint town with charming people. Plus, there was you.

The little sigh of contentment that you made as he hugged you closer let him completely make up his mind. This was where he wanted to stay, this is what he wanted, and he’d do everything he could to make sure he got to keep it.

“Sleep well, my darling,” he whispered, placing a small kiss to your forehead. “Sleep well.”

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