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vmpirevnom · 1 year

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John: Hey, Alexander. Nice Hands.

Alexander: …thanks?

John: they’d look even better wrapped around my-

Ben: -covering Lafayette’s ears- BIBLE. WRAPPED AROUND YOUR BIBLE. PRAISE THE LORD, AMEN!

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incorrect-turn · 2 months

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British officer: What are your names?

Caleb: Don’t tell him, Ben.

Ben: Good job, Caleb.

#source: atla #incorrect turn quotes #incorrect quotes #turn: washington's spies #caleb brewster #benjamin tallmadge #amrev #amc turn

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sauronnaise · 3 months

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Me: I stay away from drama.

Also, me, whenever I hear drama:

#turn washington's spies #my first turn meme be proud #caleb #caleb brewster #anna strong #george washington #benjamin tallmadge #incorrect turn quotes #turn memes #guess what #ben and georgie were bickering again #not sure who likes drama the most #between caleb richard woodhull and hewlett #richard and hewlett are the og gossip girls #shitpost #bad quality image #deal with it

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theaceofarrows · 21 days

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Welcome to the family

[Dick on the phone with Wally, while walking up the manors driveway]

Dick: I still can't believe that he got another kid! I'm gone for a few weeks, and suddenly, he gets empty nest syndrome, unbelievable

Wally: Yeah, definitely didn't see that one coming. So, have you met the kid yet?

Dick: [groans] I'm about to, not that I'm overly thrilled about this

Wally: I get it, dude. Just make sure not to take it out on the kid too much

Dick: Yeah, yeah, I'm not going to be a complete jerk. After all this mess isn't the kids fault

Dick: Ugh, I just hope this kid doesn't act like Bruce hung the starts or something-

Dick: [opens the front door]

Jason: -you really like the Frankenstein movie more than the book?! B, how STUPID can you be?!

Wally: [still on the other end of the line] What was that?

Dick: ...I'm gonna have to call you back, Wally

-

[Later]

Dick: [holding back laughter] And then, after he threw the tire iron he said- he said "Try and catch me you big boob!"

Wally: No way! He did not say that to Batman!

Dick: HE DID!

[hysterically laughing]

#dick grayson #wally west #jason todd #bruce wayne #incorrect batfamily quotes #batbros #batboys #batfamily #batfam #robin jason todd #this is cannon now #i thought about turning this into a fic but i don't have the energy #if anyone else wants to fine with me

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p1nkshield · 10 months

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I made a post earlier about how Dick should have taught Damian to use his baby face to his advantage and someone said he would teach all of his siblings. So here is the aftermath. A task force specifically designed to bring Bruce down.

Dick: Hey B, I was wondering if we could borrow the Batmobile for the weekend?

Bruce: … [no]

Dick: Pretty please I promise it will be in one piece when I give it back!

Bruce: Hnn. [Still no]

Dick: Fine then, you’ve forced my hand. ATTACK!

Tim steps forward, yawning and promising to try and sleep properly.

Bruce loses two health points.

Duke is next in the initiative order.

Duke: It would be fun!

The full power of the sun shines through his smile.

Bruce falters but passes a quick time event in his head, only losing another two health points.

Cass steps up to the plate.

Cass: I would like to go on an outing with my siblings, it sounds fun.

CRITICAL HIT!

Bruce is starting to sweat as a total of ten health points are swept away by the fact cass considers them family.

Damian decides to use his special attack! Holding the target’s sleeve makes it especially effective!

Damian: Baba, please?

A whopping fifty points! BRUCE IS HANGING ON BY A THREAD!

Jason: c’mon Dad.

Fatality

Bruce: fine.

Dick: Great job team!

Damian: yes, we got the Batmobile successfully. I will drive.

Dick: No-

#Damian: brother please?#Dick: No no no. I taught you that you can’t turn it on me!#dick grayson #jason todd #bruce wayne #incorrect batfamily quotes #damian wayne #tim drake #duke thomas #cassandra cain #batfam #dc comics

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superbat-love · 2 months

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Clark: Bruce, can I ask for a reaaally tiny favor?

Bruce: What is it, Clark?

Clark: How do you feel about a new addition to the Cave? You know, since it’s mostly just you and Alfred. Alfred wouldn't mind some extra company, would he?

Bruce: Alfred enjoys his peace and quiet. Now spit it out.

Clark: Okay, okay! I found a little bat earlier today. He seemed injured and his wing was probably clipped by a car. I patched him up at home, but he needs a safe place to recover. You have plenty of... uh... "bat-friendly" facilities in the Cave, right?

Bruce: My facilities are for surveillance and crimefighting, not wildlife rehabilitation.

Clark: Come on, Bruce! Look at this little guy! [shows him a picture of a fluffy bat with a bandaged wing on top of a Batman pillow]

Bruce: ...It is rather small.

Clark: See? You won’t even notice him! He'd be right at home with the other bats. They can be bat buddies!

Bruce: My "bat buddies" are not pets, Clark. They are wild animals that I try to maintain a respectful distance from.

Clark: Pleaaase? Think about how scared this bat will be out there all alone! He’s just a baby, Bruce! And an orphan.

Bruce: ...

Clark: ...So?

Bruce: ...Fine. But if this bat crashes into my monitors, you're taking full responsibility.

Clark: Yes! Thanks, Bruce! You won't regret this. BB is a very well-behaved bat, you’ll love him. He’d make a great bat spy one day!

Bruce: A Superbat. Cute.

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leulahart · 2 months

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the mountain's daughter

#pinterest quote turned art #simple katniss drawing instead of my usual capitol katniss #this color palette nearly killed me tho #incorrect bow anatomy #katniss everdeen #my art #mine #thg #artists on tumblr #katniss everdeen art #thg books #thg art #thg fanart #thg series #hunger games #hey look a mockingjay (attempted)

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junemo10 · 10 months

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Merlin: *Sneaks into the castle at 2am after fighting a magical evil*

Arthur: *turns around in a swivel chair* care to tell me where you were?

Merlin, hiding magical object behind his back: uh I was… with Gwaine!Tavern nights you know…

Gwaine: *also turns around in swivel chair* Care to- *keeps spinning* wait- help I can’t stop-

#I would like to think ARTHUR and all the knights are sitting in swivels chairs waiting to be mentioned as an excuse only to turn around #the fact that Arthur and Gwaine stay up waiting for him too #SORRY IM #so sorry #BASED ON FUNNY POST #BRILLIANT #I got the idea from I post I saw a while back ->#source: incorrect stranger things quotes #merlin #merthur #arthur pendragon #bbc merlin #gwaine #merthur incorrect quotes #incorrect merlin quotes

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hugeegosorry · 8 months

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i have so many text posts saved i need to do another what am i doing part soon. in the meantime enjoy more badly edited hilson singles

#this turned out so weird but i am also very tired #house md #in da house #gregory house #greg house #james wilson #hilson #house md incorrect quotes #incorrect quotes #text posts #house md meme

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james-sunshine-potter · 1 year

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Evan and Barty would constantly cuss James out for ‘domesticating’ Regulus.

Once Regulus was a cold bitch, but now Regulus smiles and blushes and talks about butterflies being in his stomach.

Sure, they didn’t like Regulus being a bitch, but he was their bitch. And they would like that back.

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velidewrites · 7 months

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Azriel: *sneaks in through the window* Rhysand, turning in his chair and flicking the light on: You want to tell me where you've been all night? Azriel: I uh...I was with Cassian Cassian, turning in his own chair: Wanna try that again?

#azriel: fine i was with feyre #feyre turning as yet another chair appears: strike two bitch #incorrect acotar quotes #the bat boys #the bat boys acotar #rhysand #rhysand acotar #azriel shadowsinger #azriel acotar #cassian acotar #acotar memes #acotar #a court of thorns and roses

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vmpirevnom · 8 months

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Lafayette: I look hot af

Ben: Arnold is drowning

Lafayette: this ain’t about him.

#turn amc #turn washington's spies #amrev #turn: washingtons spies #lafayette #crack #marquis de lafayette #meme #ben tallmadge #benjamin tallmadge #turn crack #turn memes #benedict arnold #incorrect amrev #incorrect quotes #incorrect turn quotes

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incorrect-turn · 2 months

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Ben: Congratulations, you managed to un-fuck a situation you originally fucked up.

Abe: Thanks!

#incorrect turn quotes #incorrect quotes #amc turn #turn: washington's spies #amrev #benjamin tallmadge #abe woodhull #source: tumblr

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qcomicsy · 1 year

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Phrases I bet were said on the Wayne Manor without context Part ll

Tim: You know, everytime we have to say "technically it's not murder" it doesn't sound as great as we hope it so.

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Dick, on the living room:

Duke, first time alone with him: So... Discowing, huh.

Dick: Alright-

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Alfred, very tired: I suppose I shouldn't ask about the 6'0 orange lady flying of your window this morning?

17 year old Dick Grayson: I'd really hope you not.

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Steph: I'm JUST SAYING, that IF "hypothetically" WE both showed up on patrol wearing my cape, hood down and then lifted up the hood just to show matching RedHood™ helmets behind it we could both have the joy to see penguin's henchmen pissing on their pants.

Jason putting his book down: I'm listening.

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Dick: Just- Just be nice about it, for once in your life okay?

Bruce: Hn. (lying)

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Bruce: I'd like to remind all of you that Diana has international political immunity.

Dick: The fuck you mean by that????

Bruce: No reason. Just saying. In case we all forgot.

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Alfred: We are all aware that Master Bruce isn't fond of violence *loads glock*.

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Bruce: Be nice to your brother

Jason: I'm not even nice to you.

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Jason, 10 years old talking about Dick to his school friend: Yeah, he just comes here, eat all our food, screams at Bruce for 45 minutes and goes away.

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Tim, 15 years old, also talking about Dick to his school friend: He just comes here-

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Bruce, very, very tired: So... a boat.

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Tim: Do it.

Jason, cleaning his gun: Dude what the fuck.

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Tim, 7 nights awake in a roll: Do you think if I just scream loud enough Clark will come here and put me out of my misery.

Dick as Batman, 12 nights awake in a roll: He won't.

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Dick putting Batman's suit: He couldn't at least had the DECENCY of cleaning- muffled cursing noises*

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Harley Quinn at 3 am: I'll pay you fifty bucks if you pretend you never saw me here

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Dick, 17 years old: The fuck are you doing here.

Talia, with a shitty ass grin showing the engagement ring on her finger: I live here.

Dick:

Bruce: Listen-

#batfamily shenaningans #batfamily incorrect quotes #batfam incorrect quotes #incorrect quotes #dick grayson #jason todd #duke thomas #tim drake #bruce wayne #alfred pennyworth #talia al ghul #this turned a lot more dick centric than I intended #but hey I love the boy #let's hear for the boy #what can I do #phrases I bet were said

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cod-dump · 3 months

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Laswell: Why is it when I need you to do something you’re fighting me every step of the way, but when Nik or Phil want something you bend over backwards??

Price, jokingly: Don’t you know I’m gay?

Laswell: Gay and a bottom who likes guys who are mean to him or can snap him in half

Price: I AM NOT-

Laswell: Don’t you dare lie to me. You know I’m right. I’m going to transition just so you’ll fucking listen to me for once!

Price: Kate, listen-

Laswell: It’s Kevin now, John, so you better start listening

#this is how 60% of their conversations turn out #call of duty #modern warfare #john price #kate laswell #incorrect quotes #pricegravesnik #nikpricegraves

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harringroveera · 2 months

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Steve: Fist me

Billy: What did you just say?

Steve, holding out his fist for a fist bump: Fist me!

Billy: …

Billy: It’s a fist bump, Bambi. Don’t ever say that to anyone else again, alright?

#harringrove #steve is just going around asking people to fist him until billy tells him what it is #or actually steve wanted billy to fist him but he chickened out midway so he turned it into a fist bump instead lmfao #billy hargrove #steve harrington #incorrect harringrove quotes #billy x steve #billy hargrove x steve harrington #harringroveera #incorrect billy hargrove quotes #incorrect steve harrington #harringrove textpost #steve x billy #steve harrington x billy hargrove

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