#it feels like we're meeting him for the first time all over again honestly

[softesteshouten]

Harry's language is so fucking colorful, and kind of pretentious?

I kind of love it, honestly. What a good fucking character.

#blog #upd8 #homestuck #homestuck squared #homestuck beyond canon #notwriting #notastory #harry anderson #harry anderson egbert #it feels like we're meeting him for the first time all over again honestly

[ampresandian]

Okay so season 1 was definitely Percy's story like between the flashbacks and his development over the quest The Lightning Thief is Percy's Story. The whole series is Percy's story but the way they produced the first season of the show is especially Percy's, and I need them to continue to develop this in the rest of the seasons.

Season 2, Sea of Monsters, should definitely be Annabeth's. Percy (and the readers) get to know her better--she opens up to him about her past, not just introducing him to the world they share (the Olympians) but to Her World and How it Got to Be that Way. We see more of how who Percy is impacts her (esp with Tyson), and she takes on a lot of responsibility for saving their quest. Unlike the Arch or Crusty, Annabeth is the one that saves them from Circe and takes on Polyphemus one on one.

Season 3 I think is Thalia's. It's the only chance we really have, as readers, to get to know her--we're thrown into her relationship with Percy at the beginning of the book, after our only introduction to her being her saying her name at the end of som, but we travel with her on this quest, and I think flashbacks, etc. in this season should be about her. It's the best way to let the audience get to know her, and I think we need to get to know her to understand her choice at the end (and to be excited when we see her again later). We need that her sudden disappearance at the end, when she leaves without saying goodbye and just as suddenly as she appeared she's gone, to hurt and to feel wrong and making her the Character is the way to do that imo.

Botl in season 4 I think is tricky at first glance (esp since we've given Annabeth som already) but tbh it needs to be Grover's. Flashbacks can be about his time in schools as a protector, and his time searching for Pan. Grover's development is kind of sudden in this story, but I think showing him when he's younger and like as he's been off Doing Things it would be more dramatic and honestly Grover is a fantastic character that Rick seems to forget about/ignore a lot and he should make it up by showing us what his life is like when he's not with Percy (which is increasingly often) and letting us see his independence develop to the point that he's ready to take on his new mantle and be a leader.

Season 5 is obviously Luke's. Even the book is written like that. We need flashbacks to his life and childhood just as much as Percy does, and they need to humanize him and let us empathize with who he was and how he got to who he is by the end of the story before he dies. I think they should give us flashbacks to his quest here, too, and probably the conversation he clearly has with Hermes before he goes on it (he's obviously bitter when he talks about it in tlt, and he had to get his magic shoes, and I think they need to utilize having that conversation in person so we can see how Hermes tries and fails to relate to him and also to make LMM make very very sad eyes as Luke leaves because he knows his son is at the end of his time as a hero). They can milk this for all the comparisons between Luke and Percy. I think flashbacks to his claiming, and not having to move cabins but probably like getting a bed or something now that he's here Forever, and when he becomes the Cabin Counselor. How/when he meets up with Thalia. Him seeking out fights as they make their way to camp. The battles he fights on his quest, facing monsters he's working with now, getting the scar.

#percy jackson #percy jackon and the olympians #pjo #percy series #percy jackson spoilers #pjo spoilers #pjo tv show #percy jackson tv show #sea of monsters #the titans curse #battle of the labyrinth #the last olympian #annabeth chase #thalia grace #grover underwood #luke castellan #percy jackson thoughts #percy jackson series #percy jackson tv series #percy jackson disney+ #pjo series #disney pjo #pjo show #pjo tv series #they need to keep using flashbacks #&thoughts

[taehyunsluvr]

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ Boy Next Door ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

warnings: sub!soobin, afab!reader, dom!reader, making out, friends to strangers to lovers, nerd!soobin, nicknames (noona, soobie), kinda leg riding?, first time, pervert!soobin, not proofread

a/n: short, kinda a random idea but fits him. We all know he'd he such a boob guy. Theres lore guys theres lore okay trust me

!!MDNI!!

Everyone labels him the "nerd" of the neighborhood because he's kind of the guy everyone uses for homework answers. Your friends, they can be a bit harsh. They sorta.. kinda.. bully him? That sounds realllyyy bad but really all they do is tease him from time to time. For small things like his glasses, the way he dresses, yk the usually things. And yeah, you've laughed along a few times. It felt wrong, but it was worth it to be friends with them.

Though he's always kinda been your friend, secretly. He helped you out with math when you were practically failing, listened to your endless rants about whatever drama was going down at school, and never asked for anything back. Thats just all he was though, always there, kind of like part of the scenery of your life you never really paid much attention to.

Then randomly at school, Soobin comes up to you. He's looks of nervous, which honestly wasn't that weird for him. He purposefully tried to meet you when your friends were getting snacks during your break.

"Y/n," he mutters, "there's something I really need to tell you." You just stare at him. You were kind of annoyed because if your friends saw you they would never shut up about you talking to him. "I like you, more than a friend like. I've felt this way for a while but didn't say anything because I know how it is with your friends..I know you laugh with them, and it's cool but we're graduating soon so I didn't want to miss the opportunity." You didn't really give him an answer. You just stared at him, mouth open slightly and with a confused expression before he walked away.

It pissed you off that he just HAD to tell you. It was awkward as HELLL and now you couldn't even ask him for help with work. And not to mention finals were like in a week. And now you stood in your kitchen, pissed of because your mom told you 5 minutes ahead of time that the Choi's would be coming to your house to have dinner. Was this a joke? Well you wanted to make the best of it. At least you could play around with him for the time you had. You tried slightly with your outfit and makeup, but no too hard. When the door opened and his family entered, you were sitting on the couch. You got up to greet them all, glancing at Soobin. He had his usual black framed glasses on, and a plain outfit.

"Hey you came." You waved slightly to him. He VERY awkwardly waved back, looking at his feet avoiding eye contact. "Mom we'll be in my room." Now this would sound suspicious if it wasn't for the fact that you've known each other since you've worn diapers. You both made your way up your stairs, and into your room. "You can sit on my bed if you want." He nodded silently. "Soo.. anything new with you?" You wanted to talk about something, ANYTHING to break this awkward suffocating feeling. It wasn't just awkward, but you were also still pissed. You weren't pissed at the fact that he abruptly confessed, but more by the fact that he didn't let you give a proper response. He constantly avoided you at school and pretended not to be home when you brought stuff over to his house for his family. Did he think he was alone with his feelings?

"Some people started a rumor at school.." He said breaking the silence again. "They said we're a couple. You raised an eyebrow. "Oh yeah? You sure you didn't start the rumor yourself?" You teased. He looked genuinely bothered. You scoweled. "What? Does it make you that unfomfortable that people think we're dating?" He quickly retorted, "N-no..! I just thought it might make you.. annoyed"

"Ill decide for myself how I feel, thanks, I dont need you deciding that."

"thats not what I meant.. I'm sorry noona.." He said repentually.

"I never even got to respond to you that day. Maybe the rumors would have been true if you let me speak." You said moving slightly closer to him on your bed. He looked confused.

"My answer is I like you too, and I do want to date you. So does that answer suit you? Or were you expecting rejection?" he paused. He felt a bit embarrassed when you so bluntly expressed your feelings to him. He wasn't expecting a positive reaction, so he felt hesitant on if he should speak or stay quite.

"H-huh?" He couldn't tell if you were teasing him or not. "If you're actually serious then why didn't you just tell me then?"

"Because you didn't give me the opportunity to. Well its good we got that out of the way. I'm actually really excited now. We can do tons of fun couple things." She said facing him.

"We-w-what?" The whole mood shifted. A moment ago you guy's were all serious, which was totally out of character for you. Soobin was taken by surprise as you leaned closer. "What 'couple things' are you talking about..?" His voice broke as he spoke.

"we could play around and.." she leaned closer to whisper to him, "I would even.. let you touch them." She leaned back away from him and laughed hysterically while cupping her chest in her hands.

Soobin felt his entire face immideitatly turn red and his heart rate shoot up. He felt like he could die from embarassment as he felt his body heat up because of the teasing. He could only slightly nod. "W-well I guess.. we can do that.."

"Oh so you're admitting to being a pervert?"

"I-it's.. not like that" He said answering quickly. "I'm not.." it was a joke you often said to him before.

"You've thought about it before haven't u? How they felt?"

"W-well.. um.. yeah.. I have thought about it.. but that doesn't make me a perv.." His face flushed even more than before.

"It totally does. But your wish is my command." She took his big hand and placed it on her chest. Soobin immediately felt a sudden warmth on his hand. It was like every nerve was being stimulated, and his breath began to become more heavy as his heart rate increased. You never knew boobs turned guys on this much. Or maybe it was just Soobin..

"You like it right?" You teased.

"W-well, I mean.. they're- they look really soft and I.." He trailed off and he was stuttering profusely. It was already too much for him to handle.

"you're already this flustered from feeling my clothed chest?' He nodded in a mix of shame and embarrassment. His face was completely red now. You wanted to test his limits. You leaned onto him, pressing a soft gentle kiss onto his lips. You just wanted to test the waters. His eyes widened in surprise as he felt the unexpected sensation. He hesitated for a moment before slowly parting his plush lips. The kiss became more rough, and you pulled his waist, so once he attempted to pull away, naturally he fell onto his back on your bed. He gasped for air, his body trembling under yours. His hands moved up to your shoulders, trying to push you away but finding it almost impossible to resist. The warm touch of your hand started to spread all around his torso as your fingers began to run over his skin. He let a groan before speaking, "M-Mmph...p-please don't.. dont't stop.." You moved your mouth down to his kneck, slowly trailing kisses down his sensitive skin.

A shiver ran down his spine, and he let out more groans as he tried to hold onto u, not wanting you to stop. You lifted up his plain tee revealing his chest. You brought one of his even more sensitive nipples into your mouth, gently sucking. Soobin let out a soft moan, and he couldn't help but arch his back slightly. You could feel his heartbeat now, and he could feel himself getting harder under your touch. You felt it. It was huge. Wasn't he the nerd everyone asked for homework answers? Why did god give him everything. Looks, brains, and a huge cock. She let out a teasing laugh.

"Somone's excited." She lifted her knee in between his legs.

"M-mhhh..mm n-noona.." His moans became even more intense as you pushed into his hard erection through his sweatpants. He couldn't hold it in anymore. "M-more..please," he managed to whisper between ragged breaths. She gave attention to his swollen nipple while still pushing her knee into him. The sensations were overwhelming. His body trembled. He pressed his hips forward in an attempt to get closer to the sensation you were creating. "Fuck.. I can't take m-more.." His voice strained. "Mm.." He tried to hold back, but as soon as he felt your hand slip down under his sweatpants onto his hardness he couldn't help but make noises of pleasure.

"Shhh.. these walls aren't sound proof soobie." You told him, knowing there was no way anyone downstairs could hear if they couldn't hear your blasting music that you usually played on your speaker. His body tensed up and he felt himself about to climax, his hips bucking forward. "noona I'm- I-" With a suppressed and strained moan he released his seed into his sweatpants, panting heavily as the wave of pleasure washed over him. He took a second to fully come down to realize the situation. His legs still twitching, he felt both incredibly embarrassed and incredibly speechless.

"Oh- by the way I'm sorry for laughing with my friends.. before.." She had a complete 360 in the way she treated him but he didn't even seem to notice-- or care. "I-i don't even care anymore." He said calmly. "Can you grab me a tissue?"

#txt hard hours #sub!soobin #nerd!soobin #loser!soobin #txt smut

[corrodedbisexual]

Over the course of nearly a year of sleeping together, Steve has learnt to barely react to the sound of the alarm on Eddie's wristwatch in his sleep. Eddie sometimes has an early shift at the garage (which he hates with all his guts, but at least it pays okay), so Steve is used to the background sequence of several incessant beepings five minutes apart that Eddie keeps snoozing, then finally a frustrated groan, the creaking of the bed and a kiss pressed to Steve's temple before Eddie heads out to work.

This time, however, the beeping stops almost immediately, and suddenly there are arms wrapped tight around him, lips ghosting up his jaw, then hot breath against his ear.

"Steeeevieeee," Eddie sing-songs quietly, smacking another, louder kiss against his cheek.

Steve groans, opening one eye. It's dark, not even crack of dawn kinda dark. He grabs his boyfriend's arm resting on his chest, raises it closer to his face. The watch on Eddie's wrist reads 3:01.

"Eddie. What the hell."

He drops the arm on the bed and groans again, turning so he can face Eddie, still not bothering to open the other eye because he's determined to go right back to sleep. Whatever Eddie's up to, surely it can wait until morning.

Even in the dimly lit room, he can see a grin on Eddie's face, his teeth reflecting the faint light from a streetlight outside Steve's window. His eyes, wide open with excitement, look almost black in the night.

Despite the slight annoyance of being woken up, Steve's interest is piqued.

"Okay," he sighs, but with a small, amused smile. He rubs a hand across his face, slowly tries to pry his other eye open. "Seriously, Eds. What's up?"

"Happy birthday to you," Eddie starts singing quietly, the grin never leaving his face, and Steve stares in complete bewilderment. He recalls a faint memory of Eddie asking him what time he was born, and him needing to check his birth certificate because honestly, he had no idea.

"Happy birthday, dear Stevie, happy birthday to you," Eddie finishes the silly song with a soft kiss against Steve's lips, then rests his head on the pillow, pressing their foreheads together. "Okay, you can go back to sleep now, birthday boy. Sorry for waking you."

Steve gapes at him.

"Did you seriously set an alarm for 3am... to wish me happy birthday?"

"Yup," Eddie replies, squeezing him closer.

"You're insane," Steve murmurs, but he cannot help the huge grin spreading on his face as a warm, gooey feeling starts somewhere in his belly, rises up to his chest, wraps itself around his heart.

"Yeah, maybe a little." Eddie sighs, hand tracing gentle patterns across Steve's back. "Wanted to make sure I was the first. Dustin will probably call at like 8am, now he can't beat me."

The fondness in Steve's chest almost bursts his ribcage open. Suddenly, he's wide awake, throwing a leg across Eddie's hips, flipping him onto his back and feeling the surprised laughter rumble through his chest as Steve attaches his lips to his boyfriend's neck.

"We're not going back to sleep, I take it?" Eddie asks between short, breathless gasps, and Steve raises himself on his arms to look at him.

"Nope." Steve licks his lips. "I think I want my present now."

"Uhm. It's actually back at my trailer..."

"Ed-die," Steve enunciates slowly, chuckling. "Not that kinda present." He gently rolls his hips, watching his boyfriend gasp, 'oh', then draw him back down so their lips can meet.

In almost a year of dating Eddie Munson, lazy 3am birthday sex isn't even in the top 10 weirdest things he's done. But it will definitely be one of the most memorable.

#this is kinda blah but i couldn't miss the date #happy birthday stevie boy ❤️ #steddie #fanfic #steddie fic #misha-bawlins fanfic

[whatawonderfulexistence--blog]

Slow (Phantom x GN! Reader FLUFF)

WARNINGS: Suggestive ending, all fluff, Phantom is having his first crush since being summoned.

My Masterlist! ~ AO3 Link!

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You hummed to yourself as you carefully picked the ripe berries from one of Primo's pristine strawberry plants. You waved as you saw a familiar face round the corner. "Swiss, hey!" The multi ghouls wrapped you in a side hug as he approaches you.

"(Y/N), good to see you." He flashes you a sharp smile. "Would you like some help in the garden today?" You nodded with a soft laugh.

"You know help harvesting is always appreciated." He ushers his companion forward. You recognized him as one of the new Ghouls that had just been summoned. You hadn't really gotten the chance to talk to him yet, you had only exchanged a few small waves as you passed by him in the halls, you also would always give him a warm smile in hopes he would eventually warm up to you. "Hi Phantom." You see a small grin pass over his lips as he realizes you knew his name.

"We're trying to get him more comfortable with interacting with the Siblings. I was hoping he could help you out here." Phantom shifted awkwardly in his heels, you were unable to meet his gaze.

"Of course he can, I'll bring him back down to the Ghoul's Den after we're done out here." Swiss dismissed himself with a nod and a wave, briefly stopping to whisper something in Phantom's ear before clapping him on the shoulder and walking off. "Come on, let's go get you a basket." You motioned for him to follow you. You slowed your pace to allow yourself the chance to slip beside him. "How have you been adjusting so far? I'm sure this is a pretty big change for you." His eyes darted to look at you, he seemed a bit shocked that you were able to talk to him so casually.

"It's definitely a bit of a shock." He chuckles, you try your best to hide your excited expression over his response. "I honestly feel like most of the Siblings are scared of me."

"A lot of them have never been exposed to a freshly summoned Ghoul before. I'm sure they're just a little hesitant because they're not sure how to interact with you. I, however, think you seem very sweet Phantom." You glance over at him with a smile. He just looks down at the ground, folding his hands neatly behind his back. You got him set up with his own basket of gardening tools, he listened very intently to your instructions about how to harvest the produce properly without harming the plant. He watched you closely, lavender eyes scanning over your delicate fingers as you worked. The two of you moved from plant to plant, working slowly as you took time to answer whatever questions he had for you. After a while he actually seemed to be having fun, he slowly became more relaxed in your presence. He jumped down from a low rock wall out of the flower bed, almost instinctively offering you his hand. He looked back at you, almost recoiling at his own gesture. You reached out without a moment of hesitation, your fingers gliding over his palm. He breathes out a chuckle as he notices how his hand could completely engulf yours.

"You're so small." His eyes widen slightly as he suddenly drops your hand, apologizing profusely, causing you to laugh.

"Phantom, it's okay." You motioned to his hand. "May I?" He nodded slowly, you gently grabbed his palm in both your hands, your thumbs running soothingly over his skin. You pressed your hands together, allowing him a moment to look at the size difference between the two. "Your hands are really warm, it's nice." You smile at him.

"I-um," he trails off, swallowing thickly. "Would it be alright if I saw you again?" He inches forward slightly, a nervous glint in his eyes. You nod, a smile quickly spreading across your features.

"I'd like that." Phantom hesitantly pulled his hand away from yours, allowing his touch to linger in your until the very last moment. The two of you brought your fresh produce to the kitchen before you walked with him down to the Ghoul's Den.

"I hope he didn't give you too much trouble." Swiss says with a laugh.

"He wasn't any trouble at all, I had a really nice time with you today Phantom." He nods bashfully.

"Hopefully I'll be able to see you soon." He smiles softly at you, trying to hide his fangs.

"I'm always in the library in the evenings if you'd like to come keep me company." You bite your lip to try and hide your excited smile. "I'll see you later Phantom, bye Swiss." You dismiss yourself with a wave, practically skipping back to your dorm for the night. The next night you found yourself waiting anxiously as you wondered whether or not Phantom would actually show up. You sat before a roaring fire, curled up on one of the couches in the room as you skimmed through the book you had chosen, barely able to focus on the words on the page. You sat up a bit straighter as you heard the heavy door open on the opposite side of the room. Phantom slinks out of the shadows, offering you a small wave as he steps into the soft orange glow that surrounds you.

"Would it be alright if I joined you?" You nodded, scooting over to offer him a space to sit. He was rigid as he sat down, sitting up straight as he nodded at you. "You look really pretty tonight." You can't help but blush at his statement.

"Thank you." Phantom seemed even more flustered than you felt. "I'm really happy you came." You see him swallow thickly, his gaze landing on your lips.

"I am too." He admits with a bashful chuckle. "Can I admit something?" You nod, he cautiously reaches out and takes your hands in his. "I'm still learning how to interact with humans, but I've found myself feeling very attracted to you." You felt your cheeks heat up, your eyes widened slightly at his confession. You found yourself inching closer to him, his warm breath bouncing off your lips. "Can I?" He asks softly, you could feel his lips ghost over yours he was so close. You gave his hands a gentle squeeze.

"We'll take it nice and slow, okay?" He nods in response, pausing and waiting for you to take the lead. You gently run your fingers over the exposed skin of his cheek under his mask. His eyes slid shut as your lips finally found his. His grip on your hand tightens slightly as he presses himself into you. You slowly slid your hand around to the back of his neck, you hum softly as the feeling of his soft hair brushing over your fingers. Your body jolts slightly and drops your hands to let his fingers run over your waist. He tenderly squeezes at your flesh as you pull him in as close as you could manage. You parted with soft gasps, your gaze meeting one another's as soon as your eyes opened. "You're a really good kisser." You giggle causing him to get flustered.

"I'd like to do that again if that's alright." You nod, leaning into him once more. This time Phantom's lips met yours with a greater ferocity, hands grabbing hungrily at your hips while still making sure he didn't hurt you accidentally. His lips left yours, trailing across your jaw and down your neck. He nuzzles his face against your skin, your breath shudders as you try to steady your breathing. He takes your hand, slowly bringing it up to the buckle on his mask, silently asking you to remove it. Your fingers shook as you worked at the strap, eventually sliding it out of the buckle so you were able to fully remove it. His raven hair tumbled into his face, you couldn't resist reaching out to run your fingers through the soft strands. He takes a moment to study your expression, he was met with your soft gaze that held nothing short of pure adoration. "You're… you're not scared of me?"

"No," he carefully pulled you into his lap, his head lulled into your touch as you continued to play with his hair. "I think you're very handsome." His warm lips pressed against your pulse, sending a shiver down your spine.

"(Y/N)?" You hum in response to your name. You can't help but blush as Phantom's hands slide over the curve of your ass. "How slow would you like to take things?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tag List: @ramblingoak @kissingghouls @spookyghostjelly @belnovacaine @iamsarahsaysso @mustluvecho @jennmakesitweird @angellayercake

#phantom ghoul #phantom ghost #phantom x reader #phantom ghoul x reader #phantom ghost x reader #phantom ghoul fluff #phantom ghost fluff #phantom x reader fluff #phantom ghoul fan fiction #phantom ghost fan fiction #the band ghost #ghost band #ghost #the band ghost fanfiction #ghost bc #ghost fanfiction #fan fiction #ghost band fan fic #ghost band fanfiction #ghost band fic #ghost band fanfic #ghost fan fiction #ghost fanfic #ghost fic #the band ghost bc #ghost the band #the band ghost fanfic #the band ghost fan fiction #phantom nameless ghoul #nameless ghoul x reader

[l3viat8an]

Nsfw content MDNI

Late night mini brainrot hit again~! And again it’s 1am….yea enjoy~ :)

CW: my usual typos- Fem reader! ‘n Mammon being greedy, pet names. Maybe a bit of breeding kink (honestly not sure if it counts) but Mammon cums inside so yea-

"C’mon, need you, need you so bad darlin’." Mammon practically whines as his hands run all over your body, caressing and kneading every inch of skin he can reach.

He’d felt needy since he saw some lower level demon chatting you up at the bar and it had set him off, you were his damnit!

Other demons needed to back off! And-

Fuck, he can’t wait anymore!!- Getting back to his or your bedroom, seems unimportant and instead, he starts moving over to one of the couches in the living room, pushing you down to lay on it and climbing on top of you.

Hoping nobody walks in.

The only thing running through his mind is you~ your body, your moans, how soft you look underneath him and did he mention your pretty moans? Maybe you’ll beg him, maybe you’ll-

He’s pulled from his thoughts when you whine,

"’m right here Mammon.” as you buck your hips against his. You smile, looking up at him so sweetly. And leaning up to place a slow kiss on his lips, which he reciprocates, kissing you back even harder, greedier, as he deepens the kiss~

Grinning when you break apart and he greedily moves to tug your and his clothes off.

Pausing only a moment, to look you over and breathe out a small “Fuck,”

when he see how wet you are “All this for me?” He teases, working two fingers inside you easily to prep you a bit, “Mammon.” You whine a little louder, hips moving up to meet his hand and his grin only widens “Just fuck me already…” you look up at him and he blinks a few times before nodding, “Well, since ya really need me that bad…,,,,how could I say no?”

He still teasing for a minute, enjoying the half frustrated look on your face as he rubs his cock over your pussy, coating it in your slick.

As your about to beg again, he finally pushes in and both of you let out satisfied moans.

He holds still for a minute before starting to move, slowly at first then speeding up, until his hips are ruthlessly thrusting into you, heavy breathing mixed with moans escaping from both of you.

One of his hand grips your waist tightly, likely to bruise, and his senses all focus on you, nothing else. Just you.

One of Mammon’s hands moves down to play with your clit, his skilled fingers, always feel amazing!

And he’s enjoying the way it makes you clench erotically around his aching cock.

"go-gonna come, Mammon!” you whimper-yell as his fingers rubs harder clit and his hips thrust into you with a needy pace.

Your hands move to grip onto his shoulders for support.

"Then cum for me, sweetheart," Mammon say, his voice low as he clenches his jaw with concentration. his words push you off the edge, and your body practically shakes with how hard you came.

"Fuck, your greedy little pussy's milking my cock- s-shit" Mammon moans.

"I’m gonna fill you up, need it after- after seein’ that -hahh- fuckin’ demon flirtin’ with my human,”

"please, please, please.” You chant, in response, just wanting to feel more of him and Mammon smirks.

"Yea? Want it that bad? Then I suppose- I just have to fuck you until yer dripping with my cum."

His hips stutter into your and his breathing starts becoming uneven.

A few more thrusts and then he pushes in as deep as he can hitting that sweet spot inside you and stills, painting your walls white his cum.

You relax against the couch as he leans down to press hot, open mouthed kisses along your neck, before smirking against your skin and saying, “We're far from done, c’mon ‘n turn around for me doll~”

#roro writes #obey me! #obey me #obmswd #om! #obey me x reader #obmswd x reader #om! x reader #obmswd mammon #obmswd mammon x reader #obey me x chubby reader #obey me mammon #obey me mammon x reader #obey me mammon x you #obey me fem!reader #obey me smut #obmswd smut #om! smut #om! mammon #om! x chubby reader #obmswd mammon x chubby reader #obey me mammon smut #obey me mammon x chubby reader

[harrysmimi]

Harry From Bar

Synopsis: One where YN is conflicted but Harry is there to support her.

Ps. Mentions of abortion and religion pls do not read if this is smth bothers you. And if you are planning to read it, keep an open mind and spread no hate. This is just a work of fiction and NOT real life.

More of my work

YN was sat on her bed in complete and utter and disbelief with her head in the palms of her hand. It is horrible.

"YN!" Her friend, Brielle yelled from her bathroom. "Who's is it? Do you even know?"

"Of course I do, I do not sleep around!" YN defended herself, crying like a baby.

Look, don't take her too seriously. YN doesn't judge other people and their life choices or even let other people do the same in front of her, but she is certainly not the one who would be going out of her way to do the same. She was completely sober when she slept with this guy (so was he) she met at the bar and had a nice two hour chat with. One can say, she let her intrusive thoughts win that day. They very carefully used protection during the entire time.

She quite took on a liking on him. He was charming, adorable and caring most importantly. It is something she was drawn towards. They even exchanged their numbers before she left his place, he texted her to make sure she reach home safely.

His last text read: Perhaps we can meet again?

And her reply was a simple yes to which he reacted with a red heart. And was the end of it. Yes she went down into spiral of the weird betrayed feeling for the first time from someone who she started to grow immediate romantic feelings for. It went on for about a month, she couldn't bring herself to text him. Now this is the third month.

You see YN missed her period for the second time and it did not take her long enough to put two and two together before she was calling her best friend over. This is something serious and had her going down yet another spiral that she had to take two days off work. That isn't like her at all, she loves her job and she hardly ever takes a day off from work. The entire point of her moving to a completely different country was her work.

"Then who is he?" Brielle asked, pulling YN back down to earth.

"The guy I met at the bar three months ago." YN let out a sigh and quickly added, "I haven't dared to sleep with anyone else, before you say anything!"

"Oh okay!" Brielle sighed, "do you want to keep it?"

"I, I, I honestly don't know." YN shrugged, "I mean I am certainly not ready for it and my grandfather and dad and brother will have me buried alive if they find out."

"Who cares about them!" Her friend sighed again and sat down next to her, "it's your body, do whatever the fuck you want to!"

"I know Brielle, but..." YN stopped herself, "I need to talk to him. But I don't know if I should call him or text him."

"Duh! Call him over!"

"I am scared, what if he thinks I am just to trap him? I quite liked him, we were going to see each other again soon but it never happened." And it started, YN cried her eyes out for next hour and half.

It's not a challenge for her to bring a human into the world and raise it, she is definitely financially capable of that, but she is not mentally or emotionally capable to do so. She still has so much to grow in her life and having a baby was further down her list of priorities, most probably after marriage.

Truth is, YN had been sulking around for about a week think the same and a pink plastic stick just brought her fears into reality for her. She's been contemplating her entire life since then.

"He is not going to think that." Brielle assured her friend, "if he does, we're going to kick him to the curb where he belongs and move on."

"It's not that easy." YN shook her head still sniffling on her tears. "I, I, I am going to text him, I can't talk right now."

"Okay, let's do it." Brielle urged her and YN finally texted the guy. Just by the start of the morning three days later she got a reply back.

Harry from Bar

- Hi, this is not Harry.

- I am Jasmine

- This number doesn't belong to him anymore I recently got this :)

That made her heart drop to her stomach. And she was all alone. Her best friend had gone home. It was luckily a Sunday for her and she had to go grocery shopping, even though she didn't wanted to she's still got to eat. She still got her reusable bag and drove to the grocery store.

She has been asking her pregnant cousin what she can eat and can't eat indirectly because she has no idea what to do.

It's just so confusing!

She picked out mostly junk food which she found appetising, which contained chips, ice cream, bread and butter and some other healthier options too. Lately she has been too exhausted to even cook herself meals for the whole day.

Just as YN was loading her bags in the back seat of her car she saw the guy from the bar walking into store with a girl. He had his arm around her shoulder. Now YN knew who it was, the girl was his sister. He'd shown her the pictures when he was sharing his weekend's experience with her that night.

Just as she was about done he saw her and approached her excusing himself from his sister. Luckily she had her sun glasses on to hide her swollen eyes from crying so much. Though her red cheeks and nose would be pretty evident.

"Hey, YN!" He chirped.

"Hi." She smiled shutting her car door.

"Haven't seen you in a long time." He started, "actually, let me rephrase that I wasn't in town for a few months so couldn't get back to you."

"Oh, I, I texted you yesterday." She started, still sniffling from her tears from three hours ago. "You changed your number."

"Oh, yeah." He smiled sheepishly, "I lost my phone and we couldn't find it. They gave me a new number, also lost all of my contacts. You sound sick, you alright love?"

"Yeah, I, uhhhhh, I actually wanted to talk to you about something."

"Yeah, what is it?" Now she had his undivided attention, which intimidated her even more to approach the conversation.

"Not, not here please. Can we like go somewhere private?" She could hear her heart thump in her ears.

"Okay, you wanna go to mine?" He asked.

"I, I have groceries in my car. It's not that urgent anyway." Harry could tell it is indeed something urgent and she is making excuses.

"Then we can go to yours." He announced, "I will tell my sister she can take my car, we can go to your place and talk."

YN just nodded in agreement. He just walked over to his sister for a minute meanwhile YN got herself a few seconds to gather herself up. She's been going through a shit ton of emotional turmoil and, balancing a very demanding job with very little food and nutrition was never a challenge for her but with a growing fetus inside in a different story. Her lifestyle works for her, but it is not working while she is clearly pregnant. She knew she shouldn't have gotten that ultrasound there it's fucked her up emotionally even more.

"Okay shall we go?" Harry came back to her.

"Mhmm." She nodded. She some how managed to drive to her place and Harry carried all her groceries upto her flat for her. "You want water? Or tea, or coffee?"

"Water is fine, thank you." He nodded.

"Please, have a seat." She insisted as she reached for a glass. He watched her as he sat on the bar stool behind the kitchen counter. The flat with a loft bedroom was small yet incredibly lavish and luxurious looking, maybe it's the way she has it all set up. He also noticed she haven't taken off her sunglasses yet. She sat the glass of water in front of him and walked around the country. "I will be back, just a second." She went into her bedroom upstairs and came back down with a with a blue folder and without her sunglasses.

"You alright YN?" He asked, now clearly worried seeing her red puffy eyes.

"I don't know how to tell you," her voice cracked as she tried not to cry but her eyes were pooled up with tears.

"Hey, what happened?" He was quick to get off his seat and go hug her the first thing. "It's okay. It's okay, I promise!" She wrapped her arms around him. "You can tell me, that's okay." He caressed the back of her head as she had her face buried in his white shirt.

"I, I, I am pregnant and I don't know what to do!" She cried out in muffles, "it's yours I promise!"

"Hey, hey, hey I want you to take in a deep breath for me, okay?" He guided her through the breathing exercise to get her to calm down a little. She just looked at him with guilt and hope in her eyes, "look, I trust you. Look at you, you've gone all pale come and sit on the sofa." He walked her to the sofa quickly fetched her a glass of water. "You need time to gather yourself?" To which she nodded.

Harry sat there in silence. Well, this wasn't the first time for him to go through a scare like. Certainly his past girlfriends went through similar situations but all of those have turned out to be negative, this time it turned out to be positive with a girl he knew only for two hours.

Well, he was quite smitten by her. And to be honest he really couldn't stop thinking about all these months, if it weren't for his phone getting lost he would have asked her out. He even visited the same bar a couple of time hoping to see her there, but he didn't and he eventually had to go on the tour in America. He'd nust gotten back home a two days ago and now he's gotten the news that he could potentially be a dad now.

But, whatever YN wishes to do. She seems very conflicted to him. If she choses to not keep it, he'd support her. If she choses to keep it, he'd support her anyway and step up to be a present dad regardless of where his relation with her leads.

They both sat there for what seemed like to be hours but in reality it's just been ten minutes. "Can you please fetch that folder?"

"Yeah." Harry quickly got up and brought her the blue folder, from which she took out a few reports.

"Got these pictures yesterday when I went for the appointment." She showed him the grainy ultrasound pictures, a seahorse looking silhouette was the cutest thing ever, it took his breath away.

"Oh, I see them!" He whispered, pointing his finger to the obvious human fetus silhouette. His eyes pooled up with tears.

"Yeah." She nodded and they both sat in silence again, or at least Harry could feel his heart thumping in his ears.

"Oh my god!" He took in a deep breath to face the conversation, "you want to keep it?"

"I don't know." She looked down at her hands in her lap, "I don't know honestly. But if you don't want to have to do anything with this matter, I understand."

"Don't say that." He moved closer to her carefully, "I want to be there to support you, no matter what your decision is. At the end of the day it's your body you're going to house a human for nine months in."

"Do you want it?" She asked, "don't give me a diplomatic answer please."

"I do want a baby, I want to be a dad one day or other, yeah. I think I'd want this little one." He admitted after yet another silent pause from him. "I don't want you to base your decision on what I want YN."

"I know." She nodded, "I know I will be a bad mother, I am not emotional there to be a parent plus I'd have to deal with my family for getting pregnant like this. But I don't want to get rid of it, I know this will sound stupid but I don't think that's the right thing to do with an innocent life. I don't want to kill it."

"It's not stupid, your feelings are valid." He took her hand in his into a gentle hold, "if you don't feel ready for it, I say don't do it. Even though you'd have plenty of time to prepare, but if you really think you can't, then you shouldn't have to."

"You are not helping." She started sobbing again.

"Hey, can I hug you?" He asked carefully approaching her to which she responded with just curling up next to him, he wrapped his arms around her. "What do you want now? And be honest with me, please."

"I want to focus on my career." She shared, "it sounds mean, but I am really not ready. It's going to be a big conflict as well because I am not married I just don't know what to do!"

"Hey, first off all, your feelings are not stupid." Harry corrected her, "you don't want the baby?"

"I don't know, but I know if I have this baby I won't be able to be there for him or her. I am not ready!" She sobbed again.

"Hey look, you don't have to." He announced, "you want me to go with you?"

"You will?"

"Of course, I would!" He squeezed her in his arms gently, "look you shouldn't feel guilty for putting yourself first. It's very important you that, yes it is difficult to make these kind of decisions. But put yourself first."

"Okay." She nodded, now slowly pulling away from him not wanting to make things awkward. "Did the condom really broke?"

"You want me to be honest?" He asked with a guilty look on his red face, she nodded, "I don't know honestly, got in bed immediately after we cleaned up. I swear I would have told you."

"I trust you." And to be fair she does, the man was asking for consent at every little thing. She was also fully present in the moment.

"Did you eat something?" He asked just to get a nod of her head in answer in disagreement, "you want me to make you something? Did you get pasta?"

"Yeah." She sniffled.

"I'll go make you some pasta." He placed a delicate kiss on her head before he was off to kitchen.

"Wait, you can cook?"

"That's sounds surprising doesn't it?" He chuckled, "well, turns out I can't keep a cook as I travel so much so had to learn to cook for myself." She just gave him a small smile.

In no time Harry was done with some delicious pasta, he plated up two plates and brought them back to the sofa just to run back and get water. YN honestly did not feel like eating but she felt too guilty to let all of his hard work go to waste. It was pretty good actually, she liked it.

"I, I, will make an appointment for Tuesday then." She spoke breaking the silence between the cutlery clinking on the ceramic plates.

"Sure!" He agreed, "I will give you my new number you can text me, I will come and pick you up."

"Mhmmm." She nodded again.

That was about it for the afternoon. Harry did gave her his new number and promised not to loose it or have it saved somewhere so if he looses it he can reach out to her this time.

......................................................................

Tuesday rolled around and Harry was anxiously waiting for YN's text. It was way too early in the morning, but he was still ready for her text whenever she is.

To be honest, Harry really never got over the fact he still wants to see where things would go with YN if they both gave it a chance. He is just not so sure about how she would take it now given the situations. He is really smitten by her, so much, he will admit it shamelessly. He still finds himself grinning like an idiot when he thinks about their first interaction.

How she thought he was his own doppelganger, how she mocked him for solid fifteen minutes with an untouched wine glass in her hand. In her opinion she'd rather spend four pounds on the cheapest glass of wine even if she doesn't drink to keep the creepy men away from her.

She talked to him, apparently he wasn't being creepy and did not ask to buy her a drink. And most probably because she was having so much fun mocking him and laughing. He still doesn't know how that night happened honestly. It was blissful.

To pull him out of his day dreaming his phone started ringing, it was of course YN.

"Hello love, good morning!" He said as he answered the call, sounding way too excited.

"Hey, good morning." Her morning did not sound so good, "I called in the clinic yesterday after work they said they couldn't fit me in, and I like already took next three days off. Do, do you think you can me out here? Now I know I should have called them earlier but I had to run in early for work, there was this important thing I had to get to which I had been putting off..."

"Hey, look you don't have to explain yourself." He assured her, "let me make a few calls and we'll take care of it okay?"

"Okay." He let out a sigh, "please call me back, I'll call my friend too."

"I promise, will call you back. Give me half an hour." He reassured her again before the call was ended.

He called in his manager, and the hardest calls to make were to his mum and sister. He needed their opinions okay. He doesn't know if either of them have been into this situation but he hoped they could help. His sister told him about her friend who is a doctor at this private clinic, who she had referred her other friends too. Luckily both, his mum and sister were so nice and cool about it. To ease his nerves, it was good. Amazing actually!

He had called in the clinic and they actually had few slots open for an appointment, he made sure with YN first before booking one. Rest assure he wasn't ready for the questions she bombarded him with when he went to pick her up. The clinic wasn't so far away from her place actually.

Harry spent his entire Sunday night and all Monday researching about the pregnancy and everything which came with it. And everything about the abortion.

"Harry, it is a private clinic, I really can't afford it. Do you think they'll charge to cancel the appointment?" She panicked when he told the name of the clinic.

"Don't worry about it, we'll take of it."

"No, no, nope! I really can't afford it." She started to get stressed.

Actually she had spent more at hospital these past few weeks than she had her entire life. She had to actually dip into her savings which she was going to use to buy the flat she is living in. Maybe in a couple more years, or at least before he lease ends as her landlord was really looking to sell the property. And it was eating at her that a huge chunk of her savings went to something she could so surely avoided from happening.

"Let's just go in okay, let's just see what they say first." He parked his car and got out to get the door for her. YN was clearly nervous the whole time.

She had gone in for the procedure alone actually, she could apparently go home by the evening they said. If things seem good, or they'd have to keep her in for the night. Which none of them were prepared for. Harry had to wait outside for about an hour before he was told he could see her in the recovery room.

"Hey love, you doing alright?" He asked as he carefully entered the room. A nurse was checking up on her there.

"She is a bit drowsy, let her sleep if she wants to." The nurse informed, "she is doing well, you can probably take her home by evening." He smiled at Harry before he was out.

"Thank you." Harry acknowledged the nurse and carefully sat beside YN on the edge of her bed.

"You are blurry." She shared.

"You are under a lot of meds right now love." He shared, "you want to take a nap?"

"Mhmm." She nodded, "I, I want to lay on my side but I can't move."

"You want me to help you?" He offered already helping her to lie on her side, well, she did it on her own anyway, "is it better now?"

"Yeah."

"I'll wait here for you, okay?"

"Thanks." Her eyes were already closed shut.

Harry sat right next to her for next three hours as she took a much needed nap. He found some old magazine to keep himself occupied, he read almost every little gossip and random facts column. He got to know ketchup was once used at medicine and shrimp's heart is in it's brain. Totally weird as fuck!

None the less YN was up in a couple of hours. She was doing well.

"Hi!" He greeted her as he placed the magazine down.

"Hi." She smiled back.

"How are you feeling now?" He asked watching her carefully, her forehead was all sweaty.

"I am warm, I don't know." She yawned.

"Want me to turn up the AC?" He asked to which she nodded in yes, he did so after he found the remote, "you need a minute or do you want me to call a nurse?"

"I don't want to see anyone right now, there were like five people there." She shared.

"Mhmm, do you need something?"

"Nope, I am good, thank you!" She smiled again now lying on her back.

"You did so great, the nurse said you can be discharged by evening hopefully." He shared, "what do you want for dinner, it's my treat."

"Oh, can we get burgers? I am really craving those I don't why!" She chuckled weakly making him grin showing off his dimples.

"Sure, anything you want, love." He carefully leaned down to press a kiss on her forehead. It felt natural in the moment but he felt awkward real quick. "Hey, can I ask you something real quick? I don't know, it might be a bit of a wrong time to do so."

"What is it?" She let her hed relax more into her pillow, still teensy bit drowsy from the medications but technically sober and in her consensus. Harry took a hold of her hand, the pad of his thumb rubbing over her knuckles.

"How, how about after you're feeling better and have rested well enough, we, we— I mean you and I can go grab dinner sometime?" He asked nervously, he is a little scared to be honest but he's trying his best to act cool. "I mean like a date. I've always wanted to ask you out to be honest!" A soft embarrassed chuckle left his mouth.

"A date?"

"Yeah, only if you want it to be." He added quickly.

"You, you sure you want that?" YN asked, her eyes welling up with tears in instance. In her defence she was starting to get cramps now, bht it was just the partial reason of her getting emotional.

"Why wouldn't I be?" He announced more than making it sound like a question, "was going to ask you out the same day but got a last minute call from my manager and then shit happened. Hey, why are you crying?"

"You're asking me for a date, I just got rid of your and my baby." She pointed out feeling guilty.

"Hey, hey, hey that's not why I asked you out my love, it's because I genuinely like you!" He announced to her, "I just want to get to know you, you are the most genuine person I've met in a very, very long time now. And you placed yourself first, don't have to be guilty about it. You know I wish I would have asked this the very morning I booked you that cab back to yours. I wish I wouldn't have lost my phone then."

"Really?"

"Yes!" He chuckled, finding her red nose now adorably funny, "I really do feel that way. Not asking you out just because I got you pregnant, lovie. I really do like you a lot!"

"I qm going to cry, stop!" And her voice was choking already as she spoke, which made Harry pull her in a warm and tight embrace.

"I respect your choice YN, that's the bare minimum I could do, you deserve so much more." He whispered in her ear.

It's been weighing on her heart, when growing up all she was taught that when she finally get married and get pregnant she has to keep that child and care for it, it's her duty to do so. If she felt otherwise, she was being ungrateful of the great gift. Her family is very religious, still. And by-product of that belief is herself and other five of her siblings. Though it is going to take time to get over those internalised misogyny, she hopes she can over come those really.

She really do wants kids, she is not sure how or when yet, but she does. This time felt just way too wrong to her. She can barely take care of herself let alone take care a whole new human and teach it how to go by their day and manage their emotions. It is definitely much more than just being able to financially take care of someone.

After what felt like whole ten minutes but actually had just been a minute Harry tried to pull away but YN wouldn't let him. "No, please don't."

"Oh, no I won't darling." He held her tight again, "you'd still let me take you out?"

"Yes!" She chuckled softly. "I want to get out of the hospital first please!"

"Mhmm, for that you'll have to let me go so I can go and get a nurse." He informed her.

"Oh, yeah..." He let go of him reluctantly.

"I'll give you all the cuddles you want, first let's get you out of here." He placed a gentle kiss on her forehead.

Soon they were out of the hospital and back at YN's. Harry was already planning a perfect date in his mind, given YN was adviced to rest (not bed rest) for a couple of days.

The next night Harry gave up and cooked up a nice and hearty meal for for both of them, they called it a date. According to Harry, that's the most romantic gesture he's ever done for anyone. Everything was starting to look like it was going to be fine.

......................................................................

N O T E:

Okay, so pls bare with me, my brain is a bit rusted lately. I apologise if this one sucks. I tried my best.

Also, pls feel to point out any typos, or not. I do not have time to go ahead and proof read this. I have to catch up on sleep. Hehe.

Hope you like it!!!

......................................................................

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Practice Makes Perfect | Chapter 12

synopsis: you and yuji have been best friends basically as long as you can remember, and you made a promise to each other to stay friends and help each other be the best versions of yourselves for your future partners. but will things change when yuji finally starts looking for a relationship?

pairing: yuji itadori (18+) x f!reader

themes/content: modern college au (characters aged up to 18+). language, fluff. 18+, MDNI

word count: 1.3k

a/n: we're in the home stretch y'all aaaAAH

previous chapter | series masterlist | next chapter

A week has passed since you and Yuji told each other your true feelings. Things aren't the same, but you wouldn’t want them to be.

You’ve seen him practically every day since then, whether he’s bringing you lunch between classes or spending the night with each other, you feel like you can finally breathe again when he is with you.

“You know,” he says one night while you’re watching TV in his dorm, “eventually you’re gonna have to tell Fushiguro why you kissed him.” He takes a bite of the cereal sitting in his lap.

“Shit, I can’t believe I forgot to do that. I was honestly so caught up with spending time with you I just didn’t think about it,” you respond truthfully.

“Aww, someone got distracted by me?” he teases, leaning his head over onto your shoulder and looking up at you. You push him off with a chuckle. “Hey now, don’t spill my cereal, I only have one set of sheets here and I’m not about to ruin these,” he laughs, that permanent grin spread across his face.

–

The next morning, you figure it’s time to have that conversation with Megumi. You’ll be seeing him in class today, which at least makes the transition a bit easier. Since you and Yuji made up, you've started coming back out of your shell again and allowing your smile to appear more, which Megumi has noticed but hasn’t verbally acknowledged.

When the lecture concludes, you turn to him before packing your things up.

“Hey, are you free right now? I wanted to talk to you about something,” you say, a soft smile on your face.

“Sure,” he responds, “I found a new cafe if you’d want to try that?” After weeks of barely hearing your voice and never seeing you outside of class, your request makes his heart flutter.

“Actually, I would kind of prefer one we’ve already been to before if that’s alright with you?”

“Of course,” he says, a grin now forming on his face. Seeing you smile is enough to light up the room, and he’s just happy to have you back.

–

Megumi sits at a booth as you walk over holding two drinks in your hand. By now you know his order by heart (it does help that it’s just black coffee) and you place the two mugs down in the middle of the table. You’re back where it all started, in the first coffee shop you two ever went together. The high ceilings, bookshelves lining the walls, and warm light feels like coming home.

You take your seat across from him, thinking about just how long it’s been since you were in his presence like this. Seeing him seated across from you, fluffy black hair and all-black clothes, the familiar warm scent of his cologne, you can feel your body relax a tenseness you didn’t know it still held.

Taking a small sip of your latte, your eyes move up to meet his. “How’s your sister?” you ask.

You can tell by the way he opens his mouth and closes it again, his lips curving up into a smile as he pauses, that this was not how he expected you to start this conversation. “She’s good,” he says, a soft grin on his face. “Her surgery finally got rescheduled for later this month, so hopefully things just keep getting better from there.”

“I’m glad to hear it” you respond, your voice genuine. “I was thinking about her, and you, when we weren’t really talking as much, so I just wanted to check how things were going."

His eyes soften as he looks at you. You really do care about him. “Thanks,” he breathes.

A comfortable silence falls between you for a moment as you both slowly drink your coffees.

“So,” Megumi begins, placing an elbow on the table and his chin in his open palm, “what did you want to talk to me about?”

Your body tenses slightly, knowing this is about to be difficult.

Taking in a deep breath, you open your mouth to respond, but he cuts you off before you can get anything out. “Is this about when you kissed me?” he asks, a smirk forming on his lips as he cocks his head to the side.

“Y-yeah,” you stutter, breaking eye contact to look down at the table. You didn’t expect him to bring it up so easily, and with such…confidence?

“I figured,” he chuckles. “You know, I might not be the smartest guy here, but don’t forget I know you pretty well.” He pauses, taking another sip of his coffee. “My rough timeline was: you see Yuji at the party, you kiss me, you and Yuji fight, you make up, and now we’re here, right?”

Bringing your eyes back up, you scan his face, trying to identify what emotion he’s feeling as he walks you through exactly what happened over the past few weeks. You expect him to feel angry, betrayed, embarrassed, yet all you seem to find is…amusement?

“Mhm,” you nod, “that’s basically everything.”

His smile widens. “See, I told you I know you. If I’m being honest though, I did cheat a little bit - I could hear Yuji listening to sad music very loudly through the door for a while until it stopped about a week ago, so I figured you two made up.”

“And you’re not mad at me?” you ask, trying to hide how much your voice waivers.

“Of course not,” he chuckles. “Look, don’t take this the wrong way, but I see you strictly as a friend. I love hanging out with you and doing all the stuff we do together, but I never felt like I needed more than that. When you kissed me…” he trails off, reaching his free hand up to the back of his hair, “I figured you were just going through some stuff, and it sounds like I was right.”

You exhale, finally feeling the lingering stress about this conversation leaving your body. Your shoulders relax into the seat behind you and you close your eyes for a minute. “Thank you, Megumi,” you finally respond. “I’m really glad to have a friend like you.” A smile rests on your lips.

Turning back towards him, you open your eyes and reach your hand out to his shoulder. Just like the first time you met, he leans his cheek against the back of your hand as he stares at you from across the table, eyes soft. “Any time,” he whispers.

–

Things are…easy, again. You and Yuji’s friends - now your friends - hang out every weekend, going to some party or just playing board games on the floor of one of their dorm rooms. You grow to love Toge, the sweet white-haired boy who brought you drinks at the first party you went to with Megumi and who you learn helped Yuji smuggle in the red wine that ruined one of your dresses. You get to see Maki and Nobara together, watching how Nobara shamelessly plants herself in Maki’s lap whenever she gets a chance or pretends to steal her glasses before gently placing them back on her face with a kiss. You and Megumi still hang out all the time, too, and you even started going farther and farther off campus to search for new cafes to try. Every morning feels like a gift, in part because you get to wake up next to the warmth of your favorite person.

One night after you and Yuji return to your dorm after karaoke with your friends - at which, Nobara did an incredible rendition of Somebody To Love - the two of you are cuddling in your bed when he pulls away for a moment.

He props himself up on an elbow to look at you, his eyelids low as he traces along your hips with his fingers. He’s in nothing but his sweatpants, you in a loose t-shirt and pajama shorts. “You know…” he says, a grin tugging at the corners of his face, the one that he knows you always melt for, “there’s still one thing we didn’t get to practice.”

“Oh yeah?” you tease with a chuckle. “And what’s that?”

His eyes never leave yours, and you notice them darken slightly as he opens his mouth to speak. His voice comes out low, raspy. “I want to fuck you.”

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#q writes #practice makes perfect #yuuji itadori x reader #yuuji itadori #yuuji x you #yuuji x reader #yuuji x y/n #yuuji itadori x you #yuuji itadori x y/n #yuji itadori x reader #yuji x reader #yuji itadori #yuji x you #yuji x y/n #yuji itadori x you #itadori x you #itadori x reader #jjk #jjk fanfiction #jjk fic #jjk fanfic #jjk x reader #jjk x you #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen x you #jujutsu kaisen fanfic

[bonny-kookoo]

LO King Yoongi, how did Yoongi and MC meet? How did their relationship evolve?

A/N: Warning for injury, blood, this is LO we're talking about after all haha

You hiss at the rather rough manner the nurse is cleaning the large gash over your back, your tears just quietly falling by now. Neither this planet nor their ruling species do really care much for empathy- you've learned that over the years you've been working at the palace here.

It's better than earth however, since you do have shelter and food here, at least.

You notice how a door opens, and everyone moves away- probably to address whoever just entered the room accordingly. And from the way the nurse closest to you bows, you can only assume who it might be.

"Leave." His voice is the only thing suddenly heard, low and rather monotone. "I'll take over from here." He states, and with that, you simply believe he's probably talking about getting rid of you. After all, you probably embarrassed him to high heavens- you honestly don't know what you were thinking.

It's quiet, the only thing you can hear the jewels on his robes moving as he takes the wet rag to tend to your wound- surprisingly enough a lot more gentle than the people before him. "Do you think of me as a king unfit for his role?" He asks, while he looks around for the needle and thread to sew the worst portion of the gash shut.

"..no." You mumble, voice quivering as you try and control your breathing as you spot him pick up the utensils necessary. His hands are warm against your skin, and you like to pretend that he's trying to sooth you with his touch rather than just doing it to push your skin back together.

"Then why did you do what you did?" He wonders, stopping for a split second as he feels you flinch from the needle going through your skin.

"..you weren't looking." You hiccup, wiping your cheeks quickly before you cover your front properly again. "It.. it wasn't fair." You just say, unable to shrug since you know that would just hurt.

Yoongi simply continues to sew your wound, hand at your front pushing you into a more straightened position, fingers able to feel you trembling from the pain. Did they not give you anything for the pain?

How long can you endure this with your weak body?

What you're correct about is the fairness of it all. The fight had been done, finished as the young man had willingly admitted defeat- just to get up and try to end the King while his back had been turned to return to his throne. And that's where you came in.

Hired from earth as a cheap worker at the palace, you'd been a little bit of a troublemaker all the time. According to other workers, you cry easily, or you'd hug and smile even more whenever someone showed you just a minimum of basic kindness. You're very openly emotional, something that doesn't fit within the usual standard of this planet's ruling species-

but he dismissed it, because down the line, you never complained, and never slacked on your assigned role. In fact, more often than not, you'd work like a ghost- Yoongi had to truly sharpen his senses to even hear you move around in the palace sometimes.

You're not even in a high position at all. You're just a helper that the general staff can use whenever they need you.

So when you jumped entirely out of line and shielded him from the attack he didn't notice quick enough, he didn't really know what to feel at first. In his culture, this is nothing but an insult to his abilities- but you're not of the same species, let alone culture.

You're human, and humans do things that sometimes don't make sense.

"You could've died." He says, trying to make it as quick but thorough as he can.

"..you're more important." You say, shrugging now- and immediately whimpering from it, making the king click his tongue in annoyance before he pushes the front of your shoulder again to make you sit straight.

"Keep that posture or you'll rip the stitches." He scolds, and you just sniffle, continuing to cry. "...I'll order them to give you something to sleep later." he mumbles.

"I have to finish the palace floors-" You start, but he cuts you off.

"You'll do none of that." He denies, quietly finishing your back before he moves to clean everything one last time, beginning to dress it. "You've earned your place." He simply tells you, placing the patches of dressing material dipped in medicine over your wound. He's silently impressed by how well you push through this- he's heard of humans passing out from much less than what you're experiencing right now.

"What do you mean?" You ask, as he wraps the gauze around you.

"You've proven strength." He explains, carefully finishing up his work. "And it's about time I chose anyways." He simply says, fixing the gauze before he let's go- making you turn a little bit, hands still covering your chest as you look up at him with eyes still full of tears.

"Chose what?" You wonder, and he reaches out to wipe your cheeks a little roughly.

"A fitting Queen."

#bts imagine #bts fanfic #bts fic #yoongi imagine #min yoongi imagines #yoongi imagines #yoongi x reader #alien yoongi

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Would I be the asshole if I start hooking up with my hook-up's friend?

Some background info is necessary here. I'm aromantic and I've always been completely open about that and as upfront about what a relationship with me will (and, more importantly, won't) entail. I met this particular guy on a dating website like OKCupid or something like that, I don't remember exactly which one. We got along and were attracted to each other so I sat him down and had my usual talk with him about what he could expect and what he should never expect and whether or not that was a relationship he was okay with having. He said yes, so we started doing basically a FWB thing.

He's incredibly hot and we are very compatible sexually (which is honestly not super common for me tbh lol). The problem is, he often gets clingy and weepy and complains to me about how lonely he is and that he really wants a romantic relationship, complete with things about how no one will ever love him and those types of sayings. I've talked to him about it a few times and asked if he was sure he wanted to keep doing this with me when I will never be able to meet that need. We're also not exclusive at all, so I usually respond to this kind of thing by encouraging him to keep seeing other people/keep putting himself out there/etc and hyping him up and stuff. Every time we talk about it he says he's good to go, that he totally understands my aromanticism and he won't try to push for romance from me, and like I said it's kind of difficult for me to find people who also want the sex I want (I guess I'm kind of kinky and a stone top which in my experience a lot of guys are not into idk) and especially to find people who are interested in sex and dating with no actual romantic feelings or intent. So I've been sticking with him even though he keeps bringing this up and kind of (seemingly) implying that he wants things from me I've told him repeatedly I can't give. I don't want to hurt his feelings by still sleeping with him if he wants love, but I'm basically operating on the assumption that he's a big boy who can make his own decisions and I've been honest with him and understanding, at least as far as I'm concerned.

That's the backstory, now we reach the issue I'm actually asking about. A few days ago, maybe as an early birthday present for me or maybe just coincidentally, this guy had a friend over at the same time as me and we ended up having a threesome. It was great! I really liked the other person involved and we were all compatible and had a lot of fun. They gave me their number on my way out.

So I've been texting with this person, that my long term (I guess, depending on your definition of "long term") hook-up introduced me to via a threesome, and they have asked me if I want to hook up again with just them. Which I totally do. I know I wouldn't be an asshole to start seeing them in addition to the first guy because we're not exclusive and never have been, and I've made myself clear from the beginning that we never would be. My question is would I be the asshole if I started seeing this person that he introduced me to via a threesome, and also stopped having sex with him (I would be open to still being friends who don't have sex, but somehow I doubt he would be very interested in that).

The thing is, this new person is also aromantic, so I know that a non-romantic sexual relationship that stays non-romantic would actually for sure be okay with them. I wouldn't have to worry a) about hurting their feelings because they want something from me I can't give, or b) them repeatedly implying they want more or thought I could change my mind eventually or whatever. But... It just seems like it might be a bit of a dick move when he introduced us for group sex and then to... cut him out of the group, I guess.

So... would I be the asshole?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

[lemmeurs]

okay. here is my 1600+ words essay on raphael. if anyone would like to adress anything from it, please do but keep it civil! i am so damn invested in this topic, i wanna hear everyone's thoughts

raphael rant

(DISCLAIMER: this essay was not written in order to justify Raphael as a character or any of his actions or intentions. i am completely skipping any point of morality, whether my own or just in general, i simply wanted to somehow try and write my feelings and thoughts down while looking at the whole thing from a subjective point of view, analyzing the design of the game, the plotline and his whole persona and just.. idk i wanted to see whether anyone else felt the way i do because i have been going INSANE over this for the past few days)

hi. i have come here today to express my thoughts and feelings on Raphael the cambion and "his final act". this is being randomly and spontaneously written in my notes app so please excuse the absolute chaos that this essay will be (no i won't be rereading it, fuck it we ball) (CONTAINS BG3 ACT III SPOILERS!!)

first of all — i am so beyond devastated that he gets killed. and not just by anyone, he gets killed BY US. THE PLAYER. WE AS THE PLAYER DELIVER THE FINAL BLOW THAT ENDS HIS EXISTENCE. not only is that very upsetting (because come on, hot devil man, obviously i don't wanna kill him??) but it also makes me feel so.. awful. like, everything about this is wrong and i hate the fact that there is no other option.

because let's review the course of the story in the house of hope:

- we barge into his house unannounced, uninvited, while he is absent

- we invade his privacy by entering what's his own personal space (yes, i know he stole it from Hope in the first place but that is not the point here — whatever his devil business is, it's still HIS, you know?? like he is a devil, this is the kinda stuff they do and honestly? i didn't want to stick my nose into it. but obviously i did because tHe sToRy etc etc. but still, it was his own thing that basically doesn't affect the player in any way so TECHNICALLY you dont have to free Hope. you can, if your character's moral compass advises so, but it doesn't affect the main plot.)

- we then proceed to walk around his house freely, lie to his archivist in order to look at the stuff we're already planning to steal

- we meet his personal incubus whom then we have the chance to either use or kill (i fought Haarlep so that's the point of view i'm looking from at this here, in which case i also robbed their corpse) and we rob his safe. and his whole bedroom actually. we read his journals. we use his bath.

- then obviously we go and rob his entire archive which includes all of his most precious possessions

- upon stealing, we slaughter every single creature in his house, fighting our way through to get to Hope's prison

- we then kill the two spectators he has guarding her (they were probably super hard to obtain??) and we just. free his prisoner. because yeah, that is the right thing to do, IM NOT SAYING THAT'S WRONG, but let's say we skip morality for a second, let's just focus on the fact that we have no ulterior motives in freeing Hope. we just wanna mess with HIS business because why not since we're already ruining all of his plans.

- and then we have the audacity to try to leave before he comes back and act like we were never there while his entire house is turned to shit.

now let's look at this list again but this time keep in mind the fact that at that point, he hasn't done A SINGLE THING to us. like, he has never harmed us, he treated us with (let's call it) "respect" and politeness, he was fine with our hesitation towards his deal and was willing to give us time. he was never aggressive towards us, he was never "the enemy".

and now you can say - okay wtf is wrong with you, that man literally admitted his intention of conquering the worlds, enslaving all mortals and basically becoming the tyrant of all while also most likely stealing everyone's souls for his own pleasure.

yes, he did, and yes, that's bad. but just because those were his intentions does not give us the right to do all that shit to him AND THEN KILL HIM. AS IF WE HAD THE RIGHT TO SERVE JUSTICE HERE?? YEAH HIS PLANS ARE EVIL BUT IT IS NOT UP TO US TO DICTATE HIS CONSEQUENCES. HIS PLANS WOULD ONLY SUCCEED IF WE GAVE HIM THE CROWN IN THE END, SO JUST- DON'T?? LIKE DO YOU GET WHAT I MEAN. IM NOT TRYING TO JUSTIFY HIS ACTIONS OR INTENTIONS, BY ALL MEANS. i'm just trying to express how weird this all made me feel because not everyone decides to play as the selfless, lawfully good hero of all, protecting the world from all evil, ever! this is roleplay, afterall!

and them obviously he comes home. he is furious, as he should be. but mostly he's betrayed because, as weird as it may be, he trusted us. he admitted to growing "quite fond of us, in his own way". he thought we were some weird sort of.. acquaintances? friends maybe? (again, i know most of our relationship with him is mostly just him manipulating us but still, it's quite clear he wasn't expecting this betrayal) and we just barged in there and disrespected him in the worst way possible. so obviously he wants to kill us now and obviously we can kill him since he's just a boss in a game. and that's what we do. and then.. that's it. we're the good guys. we ruined a man's whole career because we needed one of his toys, murdered him in his own house and just left. and we're supposed to be the good guys.

i think the source of my problem is that Raphael is never introduced as evil. we don't meet him as the big bad villain that we know we'll have to kill at some point. i swear to god, at the beginning of act 3 i trusted that man way more than i trusted the Emperor and i was so close to agreeing to his deal just because i felt like i could trust him and he would keep me safe (for some reason, let's blame it on those wonderful eyes of his).

we meet him so early on in the game and he follows through all 3 acts, making it feel like he's gonna be some key character that will matter in the end - turns out, no! we were just supposed to rob and kill him. and that's literally it. talk about wasted potential.

when i first met him i got the "unofficial narrator" vibes from him, as if he was only supposed to seem intimidating and "evil" but you could sense there was so much more to him and i was dying to see how his story would unwrap. i was so ready for a redemption act, a plot twist, anything. man was i disappointed. because how cool would it be if he turned out to be a part of the "gather your allies" quest?? imagine having him as an ally and an ACTUAL friend in the end??

and don't even GET ME STARTED on what the orb in Helsik's shop shows you after you kill him. the fact that he's not even dead yet but ABOUT TO BE DEVOURED BY MEPHISTOPHELES. ABOUT TO BE DEVOURED. BY HIS FATHER. HE. WHAT. THATS THE ENDING HE GETS. and we are the ones that served it to him when he got RIGHTFULLY pissed at us for doing all that shit to him. and im supposed to just be fine with it?? i'm supposed to feel like this was the ending he deserved and i did the right thing??

god what i would give for a different way. idk. striking a new deal with him. saving him from Mephistopheles afterwards. REDEMPTION ARC?? ANYTHING?? NO? THATS IT THEN?

now i know that you dont HAVE to kill him, you can either agree to his deal or just ignore him and the house of hope altogether. but that just defeats the whole purpose of this character?? agreeing to his deal and giving him the crown at the end results in a pretty bad ending and ignoring him means that yeah, you don't have to kill him but you also don't get anything else from him anymore. like he has no other endings, just either death or his big evil plans. and for a game with so many choices and so much branching, it just feels almost weird that that's all he is there for. then why do we meet him in act 1? why does he follow through to act 2? (yeah, astarion, i know, but i cant help but feel like they could have put a completely different way to read his runes there if they didnt want Raphael specifically to help us) WHY ARE WE ALREADY SO USED TO HIM BY THE TIME HE PRESENTS HIS DEAL? if the whole hammer business is the only thing he's in the game for, then we may have as well been introduced to him only in act 3 during the whole Voss quest. but we knew him already and he felt like some sort of a.. friend lets call it? idk. this just does not make sense to me and makes me genuinely so sad.

as i'm writing this, it's the third day after ive completed the house of hope and i literally can not think about anything else. like my mind is just going on and on about this and i cant get over it!! im actually GRIEVING a fictional devil and i dont know what to do with all these.. thoughts.

so now i actually genuinely MISS THAT MF. I MISS HIM. GIVE HIM BACK. I WASN'T DONE AND NEITHER WAS HE. PLEASE PLEASE LARIAN I CAN FIX HIM—

okay i think thats it for now. idk i wrote this so chaotically i already forgot what i said and didnt say. im just. im feeling so many things. im so fucking sad and mad that this is how it ends. rest in peace hot devil man i will never forget you.

#bg3 act 3 spoilers #bg3 raphael #bg3 spoilers #raphael the cambion #raphael #bg3 #baldurs gate 3 spoilers #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 act 3 #larian studios #bg3 essay #baldur's gate iii #bg3 discussion

[dollediary]

He's Yours, But Am I?

pairings❥ jake x fem!reader

point of view❥ 3rd person

warnings❥ mentions of sex, body issues, dieting, signs of pregnancy, abandonment, slight verbal abuse, manipulation, unprotected sex

word count❥ 20.6k

genre❥ angst, smut

synopsis❥ falling in love with your friends with benefits is a difficult burden to carry. not using protection to feel closer to each other was fun until you missed your period, so what happens when your pregnancy test results come back positive? to you, it had been a dream come true; you knew you had to break the news to him eventually, and maybe you could finally confess your feelings to him. when you do finally tell him the news he tells you he isn't ready to be a father, requesting you to stop seeing each other. falling in love with your friends with benefits is a difficult burden to carry, but it in no way compares to being in love with your friends with benefits and having his child to carry.

note: i apologize for the absence. i was so emotionally invested in writing this story, so i just kinda lacked the motivation to wrote anything else. can't promise all of your previous requests will be fulfilled, but i'll do my best! please like, reblog, and interact as much as possible! it will help me get motivation to finish more stories and grant more requests. i'm super proud of this work, i think i'll do 3rd person from now on. i hope you all enjoy, let me know how you all like it!

"do you think i'm getting fat?" y/n asks her friend, chaewon, as she pinches her stomach, the almost unnoticeable weight gain making her frown at herself while she stood sideways in the mirror. chaewon frowns as she watched from the bed, she noticed y/n had been losing her glow ever since july ended, but she attributed it to their sophomore year in college that would be starting up again in weeks' time. y/n always lost her glow whenever school started back up.

"a little," chaewon replied honestly. "but that's normal! we've been eating well these days; it could just be a bloat, you know?" y/n thought about it for a second and nodded. that may have been the reason she's also been nauseous lately, too, having eaten more than her body could handle in the name of enjoying her summer break more. chaewon takes note of y/n's thoughtful silence, adding onto her statement, "we can always go to my pilates and yoga classes to change it back to normal if you want..?"

"maybe, i'm gonna wait a few days to see if it'll go down on its own first," y/n sighed, giving her reflection one last glance as she unfolded and pulled her oversized shirt down again, meeting chaewon on the bed with a jump and loud thud as she stared at the ceiling. chaewon only stared forward, continuing to watch tv as they stayed in a comfortable silence.

"you talk to hyunjin lately?" y/n asks chaewon, breaking the silence. chaewon only shrugs her shoulders in response.

"eh. how about you and jake?"

"we've been seeing each other in person more, and he's becoming more of a caller than a texter these days," she explains to which chaewon only responds with a hum of understanding.

"hyunjin and i are the kind who don't need to talk to each other everyday for our bond to be as strong as it is. when we're together, it's like he never left," the smile on chaewon's face awakens something in y/n: lovesickness. she pouts, but it's more of a pout of envy than jealousy, because she could never be jealous of her best friend.

"i wish i could relate," she groaned, turning to lay on her stomach as she receives a facetime call from jake. picking up the phone, she fights back a smile by biting the inside of her cheek. "hey, you!" her excitement comes out awkwardly, like a teenage girl trying to talk to her crush despite her heart and brain not cooperating normally like it had only seconds before.

"hey, y/n," he laughed, still not quite used to her shy demeanor on the phone. "you up to chill?" he asks, making y/n almost scream out a yes to him. but she couldn't, obviously. chaewon was over and she didn't want to kick her friend out just to hang out with a boy, especially knowing chaewon wouldn't do that to her.

"i would but my friend chae is hereㅡ"

"it's fine!" chaewon interrupts the girl, her head appearing behind y/n's in the tiny box as she waved to jake who responded with a nod. "i was just getting ready to head out soon," she walks closer, giving y/n a kiss on the cheek as y/n lowers the camera for privacy. "mwah. bye, i love you. let me know if the bloating goes down so i know whether to register you as my plus one for my next session."

"okay, okay. i love you too," y/n responds, chaewon leaving soon after. y/n finally moves her attention back to jake who was clearly eavesdropping the entire time with a cheeky smile on his face.

"bloating for what? are you on your period?" he asks, making her groan annoyed by his nosiness. "hey c'mon it's a natural thing, you can talk about it with me. plus, you know a period don't stop nothing but a sentence," he winks only making the girl groan more.

"you're gross," she gagged dramatically, making the boy burst out into a fit of laughter. "there's no way i'm having sex with you on my period," she added on, but he only laughed harder.

"why not? c'mon don't knock it till you try it! let's try it out today," he persists making her pout her lips as she thought about it. it could just be another thing she could cross off of her list of irrelevant things she did pertaining to sex.

"maybe, but i won't be getting my period for another week since i didn't come on it this week like the app said i would," she says, shrugging her shoulders. "huh. you didn't peg me to be the kind of guy who's into that stuff."

"oh, i'm not. but i think i'll be into anything that involves you, y/n."

"ugh, don't directly address me when you say things like that, you know how it gets me!"

"maybe i want you to get like that. how sexy is phone sex?"

"doesn't sound any better than real sex."

"maybe to you, i'm getting hard just listening to your voice."

"oh my god. goodnight, jake," y/n's eyes widened as she hung up, a small smile painting her lips.

waking up the next morning, and after immediately looking in the mirror, the bloating did not go down. a disappointed sigh left y/n's lips as she threw one of jake's sweatshirts over her tank top to cover the 'obvious' difference in her appearance as she made her way to campus, already dreading the day.

upon arrival, she met chaewon in their usual spots for their lecture, seeing the girl with coffee for the both of them. offering her friend a thankful smile, she took a sip of the coffee, eager for its bittersweetness to wake her up as it usually did. but her sip was quickly, and secretly spit back into the cup as an indescribable amount of disgust flooded her taste buds.

"jesus, who pissed in this coffee? it's disgusting," the girl asked, making her friend's eyebrows scrunch together in confusion. she'd known y/n's order by heart; it's been prepared by the same worker for months. y/n's never been dissatisfied with the taste of the coffee before.

"he's prepared it the same way he does every morning, so i'm confused," chaewon says, watching y/n try to give the coffee another chance by taking a longer sip, immediately gagging as she lets it drip back down into the cup again. now even the smell of it was unbearable. she pushes the coffee away all together.

"well it's shitty today, let's just get some more later," she responded, both girls shrugging it off as they listened to their professor's talking once again. y/n was tempted several times after the fact to drink the coffee, but she was too sickened by its taste and smell. she eventually got up and threw the whole cup away all together, hating the way her body was responding to it.

when lunch rolled around, it was safe to say they both had forgotten about the morning's coffee incident, and y/n was already more than excited to eat the lunch she had yet to order. though the summer sun hadn't gone yet, the heat was certainly making its way out. temperatures outside were fine, so the walk from their hall to the building holding the university's lunchroom went smoothly, however the air conditioning had murderous intent when they entered the building.

"god i hate this building," chaewon groans as she zips her jacket up, which worked to no avail as the fabric was nowhere near thick. y/n nodded in agreement as they both subconsciously agreed they'd eat quickly so they could just leave. getting into different lines, y/n walked over to the soup station, getting her favorite vegetable soup that always made the freezing AC temperatures more bearable. she fixes a smaller bowl than she usually would, already beginning her dieting journey to lose the weight she'd gained.

once she added her side dishes, she met chaewon at the table with the most sunlight shining through the big, wide open windows, eager to get the warmth that this building insisted heavily on denying.

"we should've just ordered takeout instead," y/n grumbled, sipping a spoonful of her soup juice as she closed her eyes, the steam from her soup fanning her face as a "thank you for choosing to eat me today." savoring the soup, as she usually did, she immediately cringed at the horrible taste that flooded her mouth. "my god, why is everything so shitty today? first the coffee, now this?" it was clear that her mood was plummeting from her sudden disdain towards the food she loved most. she pushed her tray away, saddened, making chaewon sigh with pity.

"do you just want some of my lasagna?" she knew y/n wouldn't want it, but she couldn't stand to see her best friend so upset about not being able to eat. it was a dumb question, because it was something y/n hated the most, but y/n nodded, pushing her tray over to the girl. chaewon is confused but gives her a reasonable amount to eat, not too much as it would go to waste if she didn't eat it, but not too little as to have her request for more in the event that it wasn't enough.

reluctantly, she takes her fork and digs into the lasagna, hating everything about it, but the smell seemed a lot more inviting that what it had been only months before, the time frame she first decided she hated the entree. taking a hesitant bite into it, her eyes shot wide open as she began chewing. it was delicious. and she didn't know why. she opted to eat more of it, quickly downing the food as she looked at chaewon, begging for more to which, of course, the girl obliged. she wasn't that hungry anyways.

days had gone by since y/n had found a new love for lasagna, she even branched out the different flavors they offered, becoming obsessed with the spinach-alfredo lasagna. they were two combinations she knew she'd usually hate being put together, but she couldn't stop eating them. and though chaewon never said it aloud, she was confused. so confused. especially confused when y/n had suddenly started gagging, on the verge of vomiting only minutes after she'd eaten so deliciously. but, she rushed to the bathroom with her friend, ready to assist her nonetheless.

it's was a sad thing for her, watching her friend look so sick and helpless over the toilet while her body kept forcing her food up, not even stopping after the fact that her stomach emptied, telling her she still needed to throw more up. when she finished, her whole body was shaking, and she was on the verge of tears from the burning she felt in her throat.

she insisted she was fine, her solution being to eat again to make up for the food lost, but after having several incidents of vomiting to the point of tears, all of them with chaewon being her personal witness, she couldn't quite convince the girl anything anymore, reluctantly having to agree to seeing the doctor and get to the bottom of it. but they weren't ready for any of the questions that the doctor would ask the poor, and naive, y/n.

"have you been sexually active in the last few months, miss l/n? more importantly, without protection?" doctor kim asks, taking both y/n and chaewon by surprise. she looks over to her friend, feeling uncomfortable by the question, but chaewon only gives her a sympathetic smile as she encourages her to answer the doctor.

"yes.. but i don't see why that matters?" y/n replies, essentially dismissing the doctor's question. there was no correlation between the two, she was just feeling a little under the weather. or maybe it was a result of her semi-depression from her weight gain? there were so many possibilities. "we think i may have a stomach bug," she adds on, making the doctor click his teeth in response. he sighs, adjusting his glasses as he looked past her, not wanting to cause conflict, but still needing to do his job.

"well, miss l/n, i'm not suggesting anything big, but since you have had unprotected sex, your symptoms are seeming to lean a lot toward-"

"i'm sorry ,doctor kim, but i don't need suggestions. i'm paying you to use your damn degree and use facts to get to the bottom of this, not suggest my symptoms have anything to do with the sex i have in my life," y/n spits out, grabbing chaewon's hand to lead her out the door.

"you go, i'll be a quick second," chaewon smiles at the agitated girl who only nodded as she stormed her way to the car. letting out the breath she'd been holding, she bowed apologetically to the doctor. "i'm sorry, doc. she's been really moody since she gained weight. she's usually the sweetest girl!"

"i see," he responds. "she may not be willing to right now, but i recommend coming back soon and getting an ultrasound to see if my thoughts may be correct," he says, getting ready to head out the room, since he no longer needed to be there, having other patients to tend to.

he'd already been long gone by then, but chaewon still responded to him. it was more for herself anyways. "i'll think about it."

looking in the mirror every morning became a habit for y/n. she absolutely hated the way she looked. she felt like she was in a body that wasn't her own, her mental health only worsening with each day she decides to stare in the mirror. she was lonely. she'd been skipping classes, telling chaewon she was just too lazy to go to, but doing that meant chaewon wouldn't be there to support her rapidly growing illness. and she couldn't just call jake, either. they argued too much and they both hated it, deciding that no contact was better than enduring the toxicity any longer.

but today, she couldn't endure not speaking to him any longer. she'd grown far more dependent on him, realizing her days of misery could only be made better by him. so, even though she knew that calling him most likely wouldn't end well, she hit the facetime button, watching with anticipation as she waited for him to pick up.

"y/n," his sigh of happiness only brought a smile to her face, and for a second everything felt better, even her stuffed nose seemed to clear for a second. her eyes watered, but she quickly blinked the forming tears away because no y/n you will NOT cry. "i missed you," he says, making her heart flutter as he frowned through the screen.

"i'm sorry," was all she could say, lumps forming in her throat. why did this have to make her so emotional? she'd never cried over something as simple as this before, it wasn't rare for jake to express his feelings for her in this way, but for whatever reason she decided that hearing all of this now meant and felt more than anything. "i missed you, too."

"how have you been?" he asks, making her lips form a thin line. she never did tell him of her illness, being scared that he'd stop coming over in fear of catching her symptoms.

"i've been bored, there's never anything to do these days, and i'm too lazy to go out."

"hm. then how about i come over and give you something to do?" his question was laced with suggestiveness, making her feel an uneasy amount of insecurity. she really wanted to have him come over, more than anything, but it just couldn't happen. not when she felt like this. and not when she looked like this either.

"i don't know, i'm pretty tired right now, too," she laughs nervously, making him sigh.

"please, y/n. it doesn't even have to be sex. i just want to be with you. i miss you," while it didn't seem like much to him to admit it, it meant the world to y/n. she felt like he really wanted her. and in a way, he did, so of course, she let her heart fall right into his arms. even though her doubts and insecurities begged her to say no, she refused to listen this time.

"okay," her heart was beating fast, unsureness running through her veins, but all of it was worth it. any ill feeling would be worth it if it meant she'd get to see his smileㅡ a smile that only existed because of her.

"say less," he giggled, hanging up the phone. she let out the breath she was holding, her senses awakening as she realized all of what she just agreed to. she looked at her outfit, too revealing for the way she was looking right now. "shorts are fine, but i need a bigger shirt," she spoke to no one but herself as she went to her closet to put on an oversized hoodie in hopes he wouldn't be able to see how "ugly" she'd become.

it didn't take long for him to arrive, engulfing her in his arms as soon as she opened the door. it was times like this that made her wonder, why would she even want to fight with him to begin with? she's head over heels in love with him; arguing with him only took away these moments from her. she couldn't stand it.

"pretty girl, you've lost your glow," he says after they pull away from their drawn out hug, grabbing her face, moving it around in his eyesight as he frowned. her eyes were accompanied with dark eye bags, her cheeks were puffy, and her skin seemed to have paled quite a bit since he'd last been over. she could only smile bitterly, that's what no sleep does to you, she thinks.

"it's because you haven't been here to shine on me," she laughed, taking his hand to walk to her bedroom where they both sat on her bed. he laughs along, happy upon the realization that they most likely wouldn't get into an argument since the majority of their arguments happened digitally.

"well we're together now, so that's all that matters," he says, making her smile. she nods, taking a second to look at him while he turns his attention to the tv, already browsing through netflix to put on a show or movie he thought they'd be able to enjoy. she didn't realize how fond she'd grown of him until now, but maybe she just forgets about it until moments like this come up for her to acknowledge them once again.

the universe was unfair to her, in more ways than one, but giving her this special relationship with jake made all of the hardships disappear. she liked jake. and even though she knew he didn't feel the same way, she liked that his actions made her feel like he did. and they shared a lot of intimate moments, so even if she didn't necessarily have the real label she wanted, there was nothing that could stop her from pretending.

maybe that's the thought that kept her going, allowing him to make himself at home in her heart more and more with each passing moment they shared. maybe that's what made her stop looking at other men the way she looked at him. maybe that's what accidentally brought her lips onto his, cupping his cheeks as her eyes closed in relief when he kissed her back. it was always heavenly to kiss jake, but this time it felt better than that. he kept her slow speed, not bothering to pull her on his lap, yet, as he was determined to savor this moment in fear of it never happening again. he moves his hand up to her cheek as she let hers fall down to her side, smiling into the kiss as he stroked her cheek lovingly.

it felt like an eternity, them staying like that. but, jake was never patient when it came to these things. and it wasn't far from how y/n was either, so naturally he attempted to escalate it, his body already anticipating how good they were going to make each other feel. but as soon as he attempted to slide his tongue in, y/n panicked, squeezing her eyes shut as she pulled away, face hot with embarrassment as she saw the confusion the boy had on his face.

"is everything okay?" he asked, putting his hand on her shoulder gently so as to not startle the girl more than he already seemed to. she averted eye contact, but nodded nonetheless. "did i do something wrong? did i make you uncomfortable-?" he asked further, thoughts spinning around his head as to why she'd pull back.

"no i'm sorry," cutting him off, her voice was low as she didn't really want him to hear her confessionㅡ afraid it would spiral into another argument given her contradicting actions. "i just.. dont want to have sex," all the thoughts and reasons he'd listed before flew out the window, his mind going quiet as did he.

"you're seeing someone else. is that it?"

"wha- no, jake! i just-"

"there's nothing else it could be," he says, making her frown. jake had been suspecting this for a while. he'd never had any problems with her whenever they called or facetimed, or even texted before. but for the past few weeks, that's all that's been happening. he'd somehow say the 'wrong' thing and she'd blow off on him, it would spiral into something worse, then they would just stop talking until one of them texts again. the last time he'd gone through that, his fling ended up leaving him and moving onto a serious relationship, something they swore they would never be able to doㅡ well, clearly not with him at least.

"jake, i swear it's not like that!" y/n's heart was beating out of her chest, she could feel his sadness even though everything he said was monotone. he was hurting over something that she wasn't even doing. and the way he already seemed so sure of it? it made her wonder how long he'd been feeling this way.

"then why do you keep leading me on and then backing out when you're the one who initiated it? are you seeing someone else, y/n?" his eyes were starting to gloss over, and she hated it. so, so much. she didn't know what to do. admitting the truth would only make him leave. her silence only further proved the point he convinced himself that he was making. adding fuel to the fire- "do i only tempt you enough to try but not go through with it? am i SO bad at fucking you that you have to go find someone else to do bette-"

"i'm not thin anymore, okay?!" she finally had the courage to cut him off, tears streaming down her face that had become hot from her frustrations caused by his baseless, but very, very hurtful accusations.

"what?"

"i've gotten fat. and-," she sighed, trying to regain her composure. "i want so badly to have sex with you, but i'm scared. i'm scared that i'll take off these baggy clothes and- you'll be disgusted by my body and leave me. i would never be so evil as to go out of my way to cheat and hurt you. this is only happening because i hate myself and my body for what it's becoming. i can't let you see me be like this."

"baby..." his voice is soft, contradicting the anger it projected only moments before. even though that one word was a great comfort to her, it only worsened her rainfall of tears as she allowed herself to break down in his arms. it was something he'd never understand. she was beautiful in his eyes, nothing would change that. "i don't care if you gain weight, or lose weight. hell, you could wake up bald and i would still find you to be the sexiest girl alive. don't you ever think otherwise."

she nodded, pulling away to look him in the eyes, her pout failing to disappear despite the fact that she was starting to feel a little bit better about it. he smiled at her bringing his lips to her forehead for a kiss, then to each individual cheeks, then finally to her lips in a kiss that was sweeter than the one shared beforeㅡ only she would let it escalate this time.

pulling back, she looked him lovingly in the eyes. they were shining the same way hers were as he pulled her back in for a hard, but not too hard, peck on the lips, more following after them as he wanted to bask in all the moment had to offer. her giggle only made him smile as he pecked her lips one last time before he went to shower each cheek with kisses as well. once he felt he'd spread the love there enough, he tilted her head to the side, trailing kisses over her neck, not any lower as his sweatshirt was in the way. moving back up, he kissed her ear before he whispered a low "take this off," while tugging on the sweatshirt that had now become a barrier between the two of them.

obeying his request, she lifted the fabric off, throwing it across the room as her body shivered from the temperature change on her bare arms. he laughed, latching his mouth back onto her neck, this time carefully sucking, leaving his own marks of love behind for her to be able to look back to if she were to question his love for her again. tugging the bottom of her shirt as she assisted him in lifting it off her head, the shirt being carelessly thrown somewhere across the room like the jacket.

he changed his position, kneeling with either knee on her side as he pushed her slightly to lay her down on the bed. he stared down at her body, scanning the beauty she was. it was then that she realized she had nothing to cover her top half, her stomach was on display for him to see and, despite his comforting words, she became embarrassed. not wanting to make it obvious that she was feeling insecure, she pulled him down to connect their lips together. letting their tongues dance with one another, he lets his hands travel down her sides, moving to spread her legs for him to grind his crotch against her, the sensations leaving them both gasping at how much they'd been neglecting their sexual needs with their petty arguments.

"fuck," she moaned into his mouth which only drove him crazy. god, words couldn't explain how much he loved those sounds she made. he pulled away, going to take off his shirt while she nearly drooled at the sight of it. everything about that man was perfect to her.

"fuck, y/n," he breathed out as he kept rolling his hips against hers, biting his lip to hold back the lewd sounds his body begged him to make. "how am i supposed to go slow when you're this sexy without trying?" his words made her tear up as she covered her face which was now hot with her shyness. the sight of it made his hips stutter, of course only she could bring him that close to climax without doing anything but being her.

he moved away from her, the warmth they shared being the first thing they missed as he pulled her shorts down, throwing it across the room as she leaned forward to pull his sweatpants down enough for him to scoot out of on his own. his cock sprung up, hitting his lower abdomen as she stared at it in all its glory: fully erect, reddened tip glistening with precum. just how she liked it. they both giggled at the fact that they both were intentionally not wearing underwear. "wanted to fuck me that bad, huh?" he smirked, leaning down to connect their lips in a kiss which she smiled in. when he pulled away she smirked back at him.

"i could say the same, baby."

he sucked in a breath, halfway opening his eyes as he began lightly stroking himself, making sure to make eye contact with her. "ah- y/n, you don't know what you do to me," he whimpered as she could only watch him with doe eyes. before he could get too comfortable stroking himself, and before she could get too comfortable watching the show, he rubbed his tip through her folds, then circled her clit (just to make her feel good) before he slowly inserted himself in.

she winced at the stretch, it really had been a while since they last had sex. he bit his lip as he pushed all the way in, unmoving. he moved his hand down, using his thumb to rub on her clit which resulted in her clenching around him. he slightly threw his head back, sighing in content at the feeling. "that's right. keep doing that," he says as he pulls out nearly all the way, only to slam himself back in completely before he decided on a pace. everything about their togetherness was just right. they knew exactly how to make each other feel good. that's what lovemaking to them was. they didn't need to be slow paced or have foreplay or perform oral before they fucked; the love showed in the way they could absorb every essence of each other's being. the way their energies combined and turned them into one.

his pace wasn't too slow, nor was it too fast. it was just enough for her to feel all of him, and it was enough to hit all the right spots, wherever she needed him most. the room was silent except for the small sounds of pleasure they both made, accompanied with the sex sounds their bodies created. he leaned forward, connecting their lips in a sweet kiss, cause everyone knows he couldn't get enough of kissing her. she returned the kiss, tears prickling in her eyes from how good everything was feeling. she loved this. she loved him. "i'm close, baby," he pulled back to announce, speeding his strokes up ever so slightly as he chased his high.

"me too," she announced, this time clenching around him more while her heartbeat only raced, each thrust bringing her closer. he rubbed circles around her clit faster as her moans started becoming more vocal, the pitch raising with each thrust until one thrust finally hit the spot. "ah, jake dont stop," she begged as he sped up to chase his own high. "dont pull out, it's okay! fuck i wanna feel it." he couldn't hold back any longer upon her words, thrusting one last time before he came to a complete stop, filling her with his seed.

"fuck," he breathed out, slowly lowering himself to be on top of her. he scooted so that she could be able to lay her head on his. it wasn't often that jake would stay cuddled up to her after they finished having sex, but he felt like he owed it to her for how shitty he had made her feel without knowing the full story. it wasn't often that he whispered sweet little nothings into her ear while stroking her hair, but tonight (despite their strict forbidden rule of affection) it felt needed. and he was willing to give her anything he felt like she needed. every action and choice he decided to make only further showed that he loved her, in a way.

even though he was sure he wasn't capable of feeling it anymore, this special relationship jake shared with her made all of his doubts about love disappear. he liked y/n. and even though it was something he'd never be able to express or accept it, he'd let his emotions be shown in the moment as they were. and, like most of everything that they did that didn't make sense, it always seemed to work out.

the sun shining through the blinds, accompanied with the unforgiving air conditioning that froze her skin, y/n yawned as she got up, rubbing her eyes. pulling the blanket up to cover her body, she looked next to her for jake, but he wasn't there. she knew that regardless of how affectionate he was last night that there'd be a chance he would still leave during the night, but it hurts to know that no matter what he'd say or do, he'd still be gone in the morning.

her tears start their early morning shift, brimming in her eyes as she pouted at the whole idea of him leaving her altogether. the tears turning into a rainfall of agony as she sobbed to her heart's content, only to be interrupted by her overwhelming need to puke. running to the bathroom she can't make it to the toilet, having to quickly choose between the floor or the sink, her brain choosing the latter of the two.

holding the edge of the sink, her head was bent over so as to not make too much of a mess. she let her first round of puke come up, feeling disgusted with herself for not being quicker. one she was finished she barely had time to recover as she took the chance to run to the toilet, finally being able to vomit there as she originally intended. it hurt and tasted like hell after she was finished, but that of course wouldn't be the end of her misfortune. upon hearing her alarm go off, she realized that she only had 15 minutes to get ready.

snoozing the alarm she immediately dialed chaewon's phone, screaming incoherent words as a weak attempt to ask for help. chaewon's eyes widened as her car's speaker blasted y/n's crying into her ears. "woah, woah, woah!" chaewon said, cutting the girl's screaming off. "talk in a way where i can understand you."

"i keep- i can't stop throwing up, i'm scared i wont be able to make it to school!" she cries out. "please chaewon, i know i ask for a lot but i need you right now," she begs the girl who was only two or three turns away from the university building. as the red light finally turned green, she sighed, making a turn that led her back on the path from where she'd originally traveled to come to school.

"i'm on my way," she lets y/n know, making her way to the nearest drugstore to make a quick purchase. y/n sighs of relief, her tear stained cheeks lifting slightly as she smiled at her friend's support through her hardships.

"thank you, chae," she says, holding onto her now empty and hurting stomach. "i'll make it up to you."

"you don't have to make anything up to me y/n. you need my help, so i'm giving it to you. just please take care of yourself until i get there, i have to make a quick stop, okay?" she says as she gets out of the car, her phone call disconnects from the car and back to her phone.

"okay," y/n sniffles as she begins coughing up a storm, gagging as she tried her best to hold down another load of vomit.

"okay, i'll hang up first. bye."

not waiting for a response, she ends the call and walks into the store. after a quick search, she immediately went over to the corner where the items lay bare for everyone to see. she picked up one of the pregnancy tests, ignoring the looks she felt on her. it was nobody's business anyways. when she went over to the register, older customers gave her judging looks, which she only smiled in return at. as soon as she got to the front, she smacked the box down, not bothering to get any other items as it would just add onto her time in the building.

"what are you hoping for?" the young cashier attempts to ask her kindly, but you can tell she was judging her too. if it had actually been chaewon in this situation where she'd need the pregnancy test for herself, she would have been passive back, but it's not her. so she didn't need to be letting it get in her head regardless of how stressful it was to be here.

"a girl," she puts on a fake smile and enthusiastic voice, praying the kid would hurry up and scan the item. once she was done doing that, she put the item in a plastic bag, quickly handing it to her.

"wishing you the best of luck as a mother!" she says to which chaewon could only nod at as she rushed out of the building and back into her car. now, chaewon wasn't the kind of citizen to speed. she knew it wasn't safe for anyone and honestly she hated it because it never felt nice to her body, especially when she was the one behind the wheels. but after the call with y/n, she had to because she knew how much y/n needed her there.

when she had let herself in using the key that y/n gifted her months ago, she ran quickly to see the girl's head hanging carelessly in the toilet as she barely moved. "y/n?" she asks, going over to her. y/n only hummed in response to assure the girl that she was still conscious. she wanted to talk, but everytime she tried to muster up words, that awfully familiar gagging overpowered her. and she didn't want to go through throwing up again, so she gave up, resorting to laying in her misery as there was nothing more she could do.

"gross, y/n," chewon says as she moves over to the sink where it was filled with her vomit, the scent making chaewon gag a little. she turns the sink water on, going under the sink to get some bleach out in hopes of it helping with washing it down. "you couldn't make it to the toilet in enough time?"

"no," y/n cries out, voice hoarse from all of it already as she gags more, another load of vomit forcing its way up as the scent of her throw up and bleach met her nose. chaewon yelps as she helps the girl throw up smoothly, holding her hair back until her body finally realizes she couldn't throw up anymore, though it was already too late by now.

the cleanup process went a lot smoother than they both expected. chaewon ordered y/n to get a sip of water to soothe her throat while she busied herself with cleaning the sink and the toilet since y/n was already so careful not to make a mess anywhere else. when both of them were finished, they laid on y/n's bed with chaewon stroking y/n's hair, the pregnancy test being the only thing on her mind. she was torn. she didn't know if she should bring it up to her, but it was the only thing on her mind since they first went to her doctor's appointment. she also was scared it would upset y/n. her emotions were unstable as of lately, and she didn't want to be on the receiving end of it, at least not now.

"y/n?" she finally speaks up after a few more minutes of internal conflict about it. y/n hummed in response. "you and jake don't use protection, right?" she asks, making y/n groan annoyed. "don't catch an attitude with me, just answer the question."

"we don't use protection, chaewon."

"okay then does he like, you know, pull out?" she asks further, making y/n stiffen up in embarrassment.

"yes."

"are you sure?"

"yes chae! god damn it," y/n says as she finally catches onto what chaewon was suggesting, blowing off the steam that was building up. it makes chaewon a bit more hesitant, but she has to do this for her; she didn't want y/n to keep living in denial if she didn't have to.

"y/n, i need you to think really hard about this. i get that you're frustrated, but i'm only asking because i want to help you... please. there has to be a time when you weren't sure if he did or not. or maybe he was a little too late to?" she is careful with her words, but they still manage to break y/n's walls down as she bursts into tears upon remembering the one important night she had so carelessly forgotten.

"there was- uh one night," she says. "i don't remember if he'd pulled out soon enough because we were both too tired to be safe about it."

"do you remember when?"

"i think it was sometime last month, but i don't really remember. all I know is that i texted you to hang out the day after because the sleep i got was so good. god chae, i don't even want to think that this could be a possibility," y/n was exasperated. she didn't want to be pregnant. anything but that. but chaewon just kept pushing the idea in her head, making her terrified that it'd be an actual possibility.

"i know, love, but i'm asking this for your own good. now, i have something for you, but you can't freak out okay?" she says as she lifts the girl's head off of her stomach, leaning into her bag to pull out the box she'd purchased.

"okay," y/n says as she looks over to chaewon's busy hands as she puts the box behind her back. "can i see?"

"okay, breathing under control?" chaewon asks. y/n nods. "and don't. freak. out. it's going to be okay," she adds on. y/n nods again as she breathes steadily, her eyes closing as she gathers her senses together without anticipating what chaewon could give her. "keep your eyes closed and just grab the box i'm about to put in your hands.

following her instructions, she gripped onto the box as soon as she felt it in her hands. opening her eyes, she couldn't help but tear up at the sight of it. she knew that her friend would give it to her eventually, but now? she wasn't ready. her grip on the box tightened as she shook her head.

"it's okay, y/n. calm down. breathe, then get up and go take the test," chaewon said, lifting the girl up as another form of encouragement. "no matter what the test says, i'm here with my undying support for you. fighting girl!"

"fighting," y/n sniffles as she goes into the bathroom, leaving an emotional chaewon behind. she sighs, laying down again to stare at the ceiling, her own tears starting to form. it hurt. all of it. from having y/n taking her frustrations out on the girl, down to each tear that spilled from y/n's eyes as she realized her life could truly be changing. she hated seeing her best friend cry, especially knowing that she didn't deserve any of that heartache. it felt selfish to sit and cry about it as if she were the one in y/n's place, but she couldn't help it.

taking a shaky breath, she exhaled in an attempt to calm herself down. she needed to be rational. if this is hard for me, then it must be hell for y/n. she quickly wipes her tears as y/n screams and falls to the bathroom floor, only a few minutes after waiting for the results. chaewon ran into the bathroom, shocked by the solemn scene in front of her. y/n, with shaky hands, held up the test to the girl's face. it was an unmistakable "YES+" on the stick. with widened eyes, chaewon pulled the sobbing girl into a hug. y/n was actually pregnant. and with jake's child at that.

"i don't want it!" she cries out as chaewon nods, quickly removing one arm from her as she began looking up clinics for an abortion.

"okay, i found some clinics," the girl says. "we can set up an appointment when you're all calmed down, okay?"

"okay."

"now let's get you to bed; you look terrible," she helped y/n clean herself up, brushing her tasseled hair into a low ponytail, washing and moisturizing her dry face, putting her pregnancy test into a bag just in case. by the time they were finished, the atmosphere had calmed down and everything seemed okay now that y/n came to terms with her conditions. she was just glad that this would all be over soon.

when the two girls finally got settled down, they decided tonight it'd be best if y/n wasn't left alone. cuddling while watching bojack horseman, talking didn't seem all that important now that y/n had a warm embrace that wouldn't leave her in the middle of the night. she nuzzles her head into chaewon's neck with a yawn. "thank you for taking care of me, chae. i love you." it catches chaewon by surprise, but she just silently smiles, deciding not to say anything since y/n was audibly snoring by now. looking down at her best friend's sleeping figure, she pauses the show and prays to god that y/n, and everything, will be okay.

august 31st. today was the day y/n's life would change forever. she wondered why nobody told her that the drive to the clinic would be so gut wrenching. when she arrives, she signs in for her appointment and sits down to wait. she got a good look around the building. there were many people here, some accompanied by lovers, others with parents, while there was the noticeable few who were alone like she was. the air wasn't as thick as she'd anticipated, but she learned from chaewon that not everyone who went to these buildings were there for abortions. a big part of her was jealous of that because oh how nice would it have been to have been able to find comfort in such a heavy decision. but the other part was thankful; she wouldn't wish this dreadful feeling on her worst enemy, and yet here she was, feeling it to its fullest extent.

chaewon sadly couldn't make it. well, y/n wouldn't allow her to, begging her not to miss any more days. it was a difficult thing to convince her, since she knew chaewon could switch to online school like she temporarily opted to do for a more flexible schedule during her pregnancy until she could put an end to it and go back to her regular classes. she'd already caused chaewon to miss so much, she'd feel guilty if she'd done it again, even if right now all she could do was wish she let herself be selfish one last time because all she wanted was to be comforted by the only person who could possibly understand her problems without judgment. she sighed, sinking down into her seat as she watched the muted television on the screen, praying her turn would come soon so she could get out of this place.

"y/n l/n?" a sweet nurse's voice called out as she looked around the waiting area. y/n's eyes widened as they were met with the nurse's who beckoned her over. her heart was beating fast as she walked behind the lady who was escorting to one of the clinic rooms where she would soon be met with the doctor who would be performing the abortion. being left alone in the room was either one of the best case scenarios right now, or possibly the worst. she could be alone for a second to calm down, or she could potentially break down before the doctor could even speak a word to her. deciding she's already cried enough tears this month, she opted to taking a deep breath to remind herself that this was her decision to make, and this was what she wanted.

"good evening, miss l/n, i'm doctor kim," a voice spoke as it entered the door. y/n turned her head slightly to the woman. she was around her mid-forties, but something about her reminded her of her mother, her aura was comforting in that sense. "i assume you're here to get an abortion performed?"

"yes, doctor," y/n responds, lowering her head since she'd suddenly become afraid to make eye contact with the woman upon the mention of the specific procedure that was soon to be performed.

"oh, miss l/n," the doctor pouted, making y/n look up at her. "before we start, i'm legally obligated to tell you the process before we perform it," the doctor explained as she placed her gloves on with a slight smacking sound. y/n nodded, then the process explanation began. as the words spilled out of doctor kim's mouth, y/n couldn't help but feel sick to her stomach. her brain started zoning out everything the doctor was saying, the only phrase she could hear in her head was her brain telling her to get out. all she could think to herself was i don't wanna do this anymore. what felt like hours, but was only around ten minutes later, the doctor finally brought her attention back with a clap.

"so?" she asks. "are you ready?" offering a comforting smile that made y/n feel anything but. she could hear her heart beating inside her chest, her breathing suddenly drowning out all the noise around her. suddenly everything felt all too much yet nothing at all. she stayed still, trying her best to process her emotions, to state her peace, or to just right out leave.

"i need to use the restroom," she squeaked out, tears brimming in her eyes as she avoided any form of eye contact with the older lady in front of her. doctor kim senses the mood shift and sighs. this was an often occurrence, so she could only understand where the girl was coming from.

"look, kid. abortion isn't for everyone," she says placing her hand on her shoulder. "you're young so you think it's the only option for you, but it isn't. there are lots of good young mothers. you can do this. i don't want you to make a decision you'll end up regretting for the rest of your life. i can see you care about your baby. give them a chance at life, give yourself this chance in life."

y/n frowns, her lips quivering as the building tears spill from her eyes. "i'm sorry," she says, burying her head inside her hands. "i'm so sorry," she apologizes, unsure what she's really sorry for, she just felt like this was all she could say.

"don't be sorry, miss l/n," doctor kim responds, helping the girl to get off her feet, taking her over to the sink to help her get herself together again. "you know, you can always come back again. we give free ultrasounds, i'm sure you'd love to see your little angel growing."

”i'll try my best," she responds as soon as the tears subside. they bid their farewells and just like that, y/n was on her way back home. and, though she felt a huge burden had been lifted off of her shoulder, she was devastated. she had to tell jake.. and that was the biggest burden of it all. exhaustion was the first thing to hit her once she arrived back inside, she was so exhausted that she almost didn't take her shoes off at the doorㅡ almost. she goes to lay down, flopping on her bed to stare at the ceiling. it was weird. this has been the first time she didn't feel the need or want to cry. instead, her brain was doing its best to think logically despite not knowing exactly what to do.

she knows one thing for sure, though: she has to call jake immediately to have him come over to break the news to him, but the problem was that she was scared. she knew without a doubt that jake adored her, but he didn't love her. they were fuck buddies, not lovers, so in terms of what she could expect from him, there was nothing. she was at a complete blank, her only way of finding out would be to put herself in the position to do so. and though she hated the idea of having to do it, it wasn't just some decision she could just back out of. so, she picks up her phone, her hand shaking as she clicks the button to dial his number. the phone rang a few times before his sweet voice sung into her ear. "hello?" he asks, making her fears start to pile up. what exactly was she supposed to say to him?

"can you come over?" she asks, her voice tinier than the sureness she was feeling. "please, like hurry up. i'm sorry for everything, i can't be on the phone too long, just hurry up." upon hearing that, jake's heart broke into pieces. he could barely process what was happening, all he knew was that he was rushing out the door and into his car as he sped to her house. after she ended the call, she released the breath she was holding, getting up to look at herself in the full body mirror. she lifted her tank top up, rubbing her 2 months pregnant belly as a river of relief washed over her. there was something so comforting about the "weight gain" now. and she decided that, no matter what, she was going to keep it. in the midst of admiring her changing body, she jumps upon hearing jake's banging on the door.

he was anxious, thinking the worst upon her sudden call that lacked context, but he didn't want to assume the worst as he was still feeling guilty about what happened last time he'd said his unspoken insecurities aloud. with her heart beating fast, she opens the door and silently lets him in. stay calm, y/n. she keeps reminding herself in her mind as she knew that was the best way to get through this challenge. she ushers for him to sit on the bed, quietly taking a seat next to him but with great distance as she was still fearful. he notices this, so when they finally make eye contact she could see the insecurities blooming through. and it broke her. "i'm so sorry," she bawls out, throwing herself onto him. her tears dont catch him by much surprise, but it doesn't stop him from feeling the emotional toll from them. he is sad, but he accepts the pitiful embrace. she's really done it, he cries to himself, the tears landing on top of her head.

he doesn't even want to ask who, why, or even why he couldn't just be enough for her. he just wants to lie and pretend it's all okay so that she'll stay with him, even if he'll regret it. "i'm so sorry," she apologizes for the hundredth time, to which he once again responds with his verbal forgiveness. she hated it. she hated being a coward in that sense. she hated not being able to tell him of her pregnancy, but she just couldn't bring herself to do it. "please don't leave me tonight," she begs as she was scared to wake up without him again because there was no certainty that he'd ever come back. he gulps in an attempt to swallow the lump forming in his throat. it doesn't work. "okay," he responds, not sure of what else he could possibly say to her. how can you comfort someone when you're in need of comfort, too? "i mean it, jake, i can't stand waking up without you, at least not now," y/n admits and it hurts jake. "promise me you'll be here when i wake."

"i promise," he says, determined to fulfill whatever need she asked from him in hopes of her continued loyalty to him. "i'll stay forever if i need toㅡ if you need me to," he says as if his honesty wasn't convincing enough. she knows he doesn't mean it in the way she needs him to, but she still lets his words comfort those unheard doubts that are plaguing her mind. she eventually pulls away, looking him in the eyes as she offers a bitter smile. she brings her thumbs up to wipe his tears away. "there's nobody else, jake," she says, seemingly being able to reassure him without him having to say a word. he sighs, and smiles back at her, choosing not to question the real issue she wanted to bring up to him. if it hurt her that much, he would wait longer to find out. but, to him, nothing could be worse to him than her finding a new man. so he'd be ready to accept and forgive anything else that she felt would burden him.

"let's just sleep," he says, laying down. she nods, moving so that he could lay on her chest. her heart was racing; she could never get used to the feeling he gave her. he smiled at the rate it was going. all of that was for him. oh, if only he knew that all those unspoken feelings were mutual. maybe then things would be easier for the two of them. but, as of right now, they would both continue to suffer in this lovesick state.

it was easy to fall asleep with him like that, and it was even easier to wake up with him in her arms. the sun was shining on them, the AC's temperature was just right for the two of them who had forgotten to get under the blanket, and the air was calm. it was a state of being that she didn't want to leave, but she had no knowledge of his work schedule, so she needed him to be up. she kisses the top of his head shyly. he scrunches his nose while she continues doing it until he moves enough for her to understand that he, too, was awake. "good morning," his voice was groggy as he was still not fully awake. she doesn't respond, letting him get up to freshen up. he walks into the bathroom, sitting on the toilet to go about his business. once he finishes, he flushes and goes to look at himself in the mirror.

his hair was disheveled and his eyes were puffy, but he felt like a million bucks as he smiled at his reflection. "nobody else, huh?" he giggles, smile widening as he applied the soap on his hands to wash them. once he finished washing them, he began drying them off on the towel as he started wondering what she had to tell him last night.

when he goes back out, he finds y/n in the kitchen grabbing some frozen breakfast burritos out of the freezer, the meal that had become one of her recent food obsessions. "baby?" he calls to get her attention, failing to see the smile she cracked as her back was turned to her. she only hums in response as she continues to plate two burritos for herself. "i'm not gonna push you to tell me anything, but i just want you to know that whatever it is that's burdening you, it's something we can get through together. there's nothing that can possibly drive me away from you. i'm ready to listen whenever you're ready to tell me."

her moves falter a bit, but she regains her composure and continues preparing her breakfast. once the microwave beeped, she met him at the table, opting to eat as a way to get her thoughts together, his words ringing through her head as she did so. when she was finished chewing her first few bites, she cleared her throat. "i'm pregnant," her voice held no emotion, so little that you wouldn't be able to tell her nervousness had it not been for her hands shaking as she held the fork midair.

"i-" he paused, not knowing exactly what to say. he was in shock. and, from the looks on her face, he knew that it couldn't be a pregnancy scare because it looked like this has been weighing her down for a while. he knew his reaction to this information would be contrary to his previous words, but he didn't expect it to be this serious. "are you sure it's mine?" he asks, breaking her heart. a huge part of him could believe she was pregnant; everything was starting to make sense from her weight gain to her overly emotional state, all the way down to her eating habitsㅡ he knew she absolutely hated burritos.

"there's nobody else, jake," her voice cracked as she offered him a small smile, the corners of her lips barely lifting as she did so. oh how comforting those words were to hear last night, but now they struck him in the worst ways possible. she looked at him, his expression unreadable as he stared directly through her each time she'd lift her eyes to check his gaze. the cat was already out of the bag, so what's the harm in emptying the mess it left behind? "and i... i want to keep it." he didn't know what to say. he didn't know what to do. and he didn't want to hurt her, but what about himself? he isn't a bad guy. it takes two to get knocked up but-

"i'm not ready to be a father," his words came out quietly, scared that hearing it himself would make the guilt he felt feel worse. and it did. the look on her face when she finally looked him in the eyes, if her glow was already dull, he'd taken it away. the words already did their damage, now he has to stay true to them. he got up from the table, hands shaky as he pushed the chair in without a word and he offers her an apologetic bow as if that could take everything back. "i'm sorry y/n." he didn't know what he expected. who would forgive a deadbeat anyways. she didn't say a word, opting to keep her head down in shame. she stayed that way, not even bothering to move even after she heard the door close behind him, announcing his genuine departure from the home.

-

y/n wasn't nearly as sad as she thought she'd be. chaewon was right, it would hurtㅡ and for a long time it did. "but once you feel okay, even for a second, everything will be okay," she told y/n. and that's what it was, after 2 months of tears, her brain shifted its focus from the pain of his absence to the changes her body was making. she noticed the small bump in which the baby was forming became more noticeable in her shirts. deciding to embrace this, she stopped wearing baggy clothes. and chaewon never failed to remind her how beautiful she looked whenever they'd go out. she noticed she started to gain weight, but it didn't make her upset.

instead of looking in the mirror with disgust, like she had done before she found out about her pregnancy, she spent her lonely nights smiling in the mirror as she rubbed her tummy. her earlier pregnancy symptoms started to lessen, and her eagerness to visit the doctors increased as she was always excited to look at her ultrasound. she no longer dealt with nausea, being able to feed both herself and the baby without fear of regurgitation, but she soon found that her stamina had also begun to change. she spent most of her off days homebound, as moving around too much could easily take her breath away.

"alright, ms.l/n," the doctor says, spreading the ultrasound gel onto y/n's tummy, the coolness giving her chills as its temperature mixed with the cold air that the air conditioner blew. "let's see how this little rascal is coming along, shall we?" doctor kim asks, moving the transducer around as real time images of the fetus started coming onto the screen. y/n tilts her head backwards to look at the screen, smiling at it.

"aww, it's got its thumb in its mouth," she cooed, putting on a happy pout to chaewon who was indulging in the screen as well. taking her eyes off of it, she signaled the doctor's attention while y/n stayed in a daze, watching her baby as it minded its business in her tummy. "are we going to be able to tell it's gender soon?" chaewon asks, making the doctor nod in response. "how long will that be?" she adds on, making the doctor think about how far along y/n was by now.

"we should be able to tell in the next week or so, from what i'm seeing, if its a male, its genitals haven't developed yet, so we'll have to wait to see if any more developments, in that sense, occur," doctor kim says, moving the transducer more around the head area. "we'll have to develop the photos before you leave, miss l/n."

"oh, please, doctor!" y/n exclaims excitedly as she continued to watch the screen. "oh my room is gonna be filled with framed pictures of these!" she claps, making the other two girls in the room smile at her joy. it was a huge change in attitude from what they'd seen just five months before. clapping her hands together, doctor kim begins to clean up the gel and transducer, putting the items away as she begins the printing process for the ultrasound pictures.

once chaewon and y/n left, they decided to go to the store to get more groceries. "i want fruit roll ups," y/n said as she looked at the aisle signs, searching for the one that displayed where the snacks were. once she spotted it, she dragged chaewon, who was holding the cart, directly to the aisle. chaewon could only giggle at her friend with the roll of her eyes. "we gotta get some healthy snacks too, love. how about some nature valley bars?"

"i don't know..." y/n responded. "i just want something sweet and chewy right now, but i could go for some dorito chips right now if you want me to eat something crunchy," she says, mouth watering at the idea of it. "nope. nope, nope, nope, nope," chaewon says, grabbing y/n's hand while she used the other one to steer out of the unhealthy aisle that they'd already stepped foot in. "we're not feeding your baby that junk, let's just stick to fruits, okay?"

y/n grumbles a complaint under her breath, but she complies as they go to the produce aisle. "let's get chocolate syrup, too. for the strawberries," she begged, which chaewon mindlessly nodded to at this point, being too busy putting boxes of berries into the cart. "then go get 'em," she says, shooing the unoccupied girl. y/n nodded as she walked over to the isle where it'd be held. she hummed a nameless tune as she looked around for the brand she wanted. picking up two different bottles, she pouted in thought, turning her head back and forth from them.

hearing a groan out of nowhere, with a familiar base in the voice, she scrunches her eyebrows and turns to where it came from. her heartbeat picked up as a distracted and frustrated jake came into her view, only around 5 feet away from her. just then, she felt a sting in her stomach. "fuck," she cursed to herself. the baby was kicking. she, with shaky hands, quickly threw one of the chocolate bottles back onto the shelf as she waddled away as quickly as possible. it had been so long since she felt the rush jake gave her. she was no longer mad at him because of what he did to her, but she was still pissed off at what he didn't and wouldn't do for their baby. "were you kicking me because you couldn't kick daddy?" she cooed rubbing her stomach as she saw chaewon rolling over to her.

"what about the baby's daddy?" chaewon asked as they began walking side by side. y/n snarled. he really doesn't deserve to be called that. she thought. but she quickly returned to her normal friendly gaze as soon as she met chaewon's eyes. "we, well i saw jaeyun in the syrup aisle, and the baby started kicking me. i think he did it because he couldn't kick him."

"he?"

"huh? oh yeah. i've got a feeling he's a boy, my girl wouldn't use me as her punching bag," she joked as she rubbed where the baby was adamant on kicking about. chaewon smiled at the sight, moving the girl's hand to replace it with her own. it almost brought her to tears as they got into the shortest line. after they'd finished paying and packing the groceries up, they were on their way back to y/n's home.

chaewon shared side glances at the girl while she sang along happily to the tunes that were blasting on the radio. she was starting to realize just how real this was and how far y/n had gotten over the course of this half year. "you're gonna be an amazing mother, you know that?" she says catching y/n by surprise as she stops mid lyric. the radio's volume didn't change, but the world went silent and everything seemed to come to a complete pause as y/n's lips trembled into a small smile, eyes watering as she did so.

in the past six months of her developing pregnancy, she was never told this. of course chaewon has always praised her for her strength, and her parents had offered support though they were disappointed, nobody has ever told her that she'd be a good mother. and, though it's something most mothers would look over, it meant the world to her because she felt like she would be anything but. she didn't realize how long she'd been crying until she no longer felt the car moving as chaewon pat her on the back in a comforting manner. "shh, it's okay. it's okay.. i promise you will be," she says, making the girl's tears pour faster.

"thank you so much," she cried out, allowing her body to milk the tears as she regulated her breathing. "i don't know why that made me cry so much, i think it's been something i've been needing to hear for a long time, you know?" she admitted, sniffling a bit. chaewon nodded, but didn't speak. she realized y/n probably wanted to say more. and she was right. "it's just.. without jake, i didn't think i could do it. i was so ashamed that he didn't want us, i thought that i would end up not wanting the baby, too. but i kept it because i knew that it deserved a chance. and i've been doubtful about my abilities as a mother, thinking i'm not good enough. but hearing that made all of this worth it, i have to be a good mother to it."

"i know, baby," chaewon said, kissing the top of her head. "now let's get you home, okay?" y/n nodded as chaewon restarted the car and finished their journey back to y/n's place. after unpacking the groceries, they spent the rest of that night cuddling while watching a movie on netflix.

-

walking into the store alone, y/n talked to chaewon, who was resting, through one bluetooth headphone in her ear. "do you really think it was a good idea to leave the gender a surprise?" she asks as she pushes the cart aimlessly around the maternity area in target. "mhm.. yeah. no yeah, you're right. well, anyways i'm just at target right now, about to buy some new jeans cause these mom ones are getting too tight... i know! it's ironic. well, i'm not gonna hold you up, you should finish working. okay, bye bye. love you, too." once the call ends, she goes to pick up some jeans. as soon as she finished picking out a pair or two, she rolled her way into the snacking aisle. a part of her was relieved that her stomach wasn't too big for her to be able to push the cart, she enjoyed being alone lately, even though she knew it wouldn't last very long as she only had 14 more weeks to go, and things would only get more difficult then.

picking up two boxes of granola bars, she hummed quietly as her head turned back and forth between the two items. she wondered which one to buy, they were both a personal favorite to her, but she wasn't looking to spend hundreds again, she still hadn't bought a bulk of the baby clothes yet since she didn't exactly know what to buy other than an excessive amount of zoo themed oneㅡ because there's nothing more gender neutral for babies than animal themed clothing. it had only been a mere seconds that she'd been so lost in her decision that she didn't even notice that particular set of eyes that were set on her, guilt building up and rushing through his veins as he stood there frozen in his spot.

jake was carrying a handheld basket. he figured he'd only needed to come to pick up some protein bars and energy drinks, he didn't need a cart. well, now he was regretting it as his grip faltered on the basket making it fall down onto the floor, items flying anywhere they pleased. luckily the boxes only slid a few feet in front of him. however, the protein shake rolled into forbidden territory, that forbidden territory being the area where she stood. his eyes widened and his head lowered as she turned her attention to the protein shake, then to him. he did his best to stall picking up the boxes as he did what he could to avoid looking at her. his hands shook as her shoes appeared in his vision.

"you dropped this, sir," she says. she had a smile on her face, the most beautiful one that he would have been crushed to see drop as soon as they made eye contact, but it did. "oh," was all she could say as he got up, gripping his basket harder as they made eye contact for the first time in a little over half a year. "oh," he responds, his eyes flickering to her stomach. a sudden punch of grief and regret hit him directly in his heart as it seemed to clench with pain. he averted his eyes and looked back into hers, but, again, he wished he hadn't. the tears were already brimming. "oh, oh. no, please don't cry. i'm sorry. please don't cry, please."

"i'm sorry. i'm just so happy to see you," her frown worsened as she squeezes her eyes shut, sobs escaping through her closed mouth while her body only shook as her arms stayed glued to her side. "shit, y/n. don't say that, please," he didn't know what to do. his eyes watered as he hesitated before pulling her in his embrace, the basket long forgotten as it fell back to the floor with a thud. he thought a hug would help, but it just hurt the both of them more. he was warm, exactly like she remembered. she wanted to be closer, to feel more of him but her stomach only allowed him to hold her so much. he felt her belly pressed against his, and it was foreign because it's nothing like the last time he held her and it was just a painful reminder of why he felt so shitty to begin with. "i'm sorry," he says, pulling back all too soon for the both of their liking. "we should leave, i don't want you crying in a target."

he grabs her hand, gently dragging her along as they walked out of the building. "i don't have a car, i ubered here," she says as she tries to keep up with his quickened steps. he nods in acknowledgement, not turning his head to her as he was too scared to look at her again. "i know, baby. we're gonna go in mine." now she was kinda glad he didn't look back at her, because her face had contorted into both a smile and a frown. she was still his baby after all this time, even if he didn't deserve it. once they reached the said vehicle, he opened the door for her, helping her get in as she couldn't climb in as swiftly as she used to due to the big changes in her body. it was kinda cute, the way she needed his help. it made him reminisce the moments that could've been. the times they could've had together if he didn't panic. brushing his thoughts aside, he got in on the driver's side as he began making his way to her place.

after they'd gotten in the house, he had the pleasure of seeing the changes made. in the kitchen, there was a green high chair with leaves scattered on it. when they walked into the living room, there was a fluffed carpet with the abc's accompanied with pictures of animals corresponding to the beginning letter. they walked into her bedroom whose walls were littered with pictures of every ultrasound, the growth of the child becoming more apparent as it continued. everything has changed. and jake wasn't here to experience any of it. he wasn't there to help her through any of it. and he felt so terrible for it.

"wow," was all he could say as he stared at the ultrasounds. she'd long been sitting on the bed, watching him. she had always wondered how she would feel when seeing him again. she wondered how he'd look physically, how he'd look at her, anything. she wondered if she would be angry. she promised herself she'd be angry, that she would lash out at him and spew all the hatred that had manifested these past seven months. but she wasn't angry. and she didn't lash out because.. she didn't want to. she was so happy to see him. and to see how he still cared for her, it healed the wounds that he had left behindㅡ most of them anyways. the room grew terribly quiet as the atmosphere began to suffocate them, engulfing them in the gloom that jake emitted into the air. he let out a shaky breath, his shoulders heaving up and down as his sobs only seemed to elevate in volume.

y/n's eyes widened as she used her step stool to get down from the bed and walk over to him, wrapping her arms around whatever her body could allow her to. he was crying. every single emotion he had pushed down was starting to tear its way through his eyes, lungs, and mouth as he buried his face inside his hands. tears, snots, and spit pooled in the palm of his hands but he didn't care. he wanted to allow himself to feel. but he felt so guilty. he didn't deserve to be comforted by her. cause god knows who was there to comfort her. "i'm sorry. fuck i'm so sorry y/n. i never wanted to leave you. i was just so scared. i was already scared to ruin our relationship. and then you told me and i freaked out. i changed my mind as soon as i walked out but i was so scared to come back because that would be so shitty, but i thought about you every single day. i want to be in the baby's life. i want to be in your life. i'll do anything to fix things. i can't keep living like this. you deserve to be taken care of, both of you. and i want to be the one to care for you."

his words touched every inch of her body, from the top of her head to way beyond her toes. she didn't even realize she was crying until it suddenly became harder to breathe in her nose, the airways being blocked by a sudden stuffiness. she let go of him, going to wipe her own tears off as he wiped his hands off. "y/n? are you okay?" he asked as she finally looked into his reddened eyes. "i waited so long for you to say those words to me. i'm so overwhelmed and happy, jaeyun. please don't leave me again," she begged, grabbing a fistful of his shirt. he didn't even get to respond as he felt her lips graze his. their tears slipped through their lips as the kiss continued. he cupped her face, bringing her impossibly closer as he tried not to apply too much pressure to her stomach. the two of them walked over to the bed, he helped her get up onto the bed where they would lay for the rest of the day.

-

"when does your lease end?" jake asks y/n as he pours himself a bowl of cereal. she shrugs, taking a bite out of her burrito. she tries her best to think about the date she'd need to renew it. "some time at the end of this month, why?"

"i want you to move in with me," he says, making her choke on her food. she coughs up the remaining pieces out of her throat as she drinks water to calm down the new burning sensation. "well, my lease ends in two weeks. i've been saving up money so we can have enough for a down payment on a better apartment. what do you think about that?" he asks, sitting across from her. she was frozen, chewing her new bite from the burrito more than it needed to be. this was all so sudden. sure, she had wanted this for a long time, but she didn't think it would happen even in her wildest dreams. it just all felt so unreal. "am i overwhelming you?" he sighed.

"no," she said after swallowing the food. "i'm just- i don't know. i just.. think there's levels to this and this is skipping a lot of them," she says. he purses his lips and thinks about it for a second before nodding in agreement. "you're right. but i think it should be fine because it's what i would've done anyways. this is making up for lost time. i have to step up as a father, and this is what fathers are supposed to do," he says. "look," pulling out his phone, he opens safari and slides his phone over to her. she looks at the screen. it was an apartment with a lovely view of the city. "only a 15 minute drive from the university and it's close to a lot of the businesses in the area. i could get it now, or we can go and do a tour and-”

"you'd really want to move in with me?" she asked, looking up from the phone. he tilted his head to the side at her. insecurities were apparent, making him realize she was still wary of the whole situation. understandably, he smiles at her with his eyes and nods his head. "of course, baby. we're making a family together. i think living together makes more sense," her posture relaxes as she smiles slightly. a family, huh? she looks through the pictures more: 3 beds, 2 baths. would he want to make more with her? there's so many 2 bedroom apartments in the same area, why not choose those? she wanted to ask him, but everything was happening too soon. and she didn't even tell chaewon that she allowed the boy back into her life yet. "i think it's fine," she says, sliding the phone back over to him. "this is good. i have no idea how i could possibly fit all of everything that i wanted to give the baby into this small apartment anyways."

"okay, then. you can say hello to our new home," he exclaims as he puts his phone in his pocket. "i gotta get to work soon, so i'll be off before your last class ends. i'll pick you up then?" he finishes off the rest of his cereal, sliding the bowl, with its sugary milk, over to her.

"oh," y/n says as she looks down at the gesture, taking the spoon out as she silently sips on the liquid before talking again as if she were embarrassed to continue her sentence. "i actually am doing the online learning course, i figured it'd give me more time to tend to the baby." even with the small laugh she let out, it was evident that she wasn't happy like, the gesture was meant to be. jake nods his head as he gets up.

"then i'll come back with some dinner, let me know what you're craving before 8:30," he says, checking his pockets for his keys. while walking out of the kitchen, he takes one last glance at her before letting out a breath and leaving. y/n stays there for a while as she lets the silence engulf her. there were always so many things to think about when she was alone these days, but today the one thing on her mind was chaewon and what exactly she was going to tell chaewon.

a big part of her wasn't ready to talk about jake yet as she wasn't completely sure if she was dreaming or not, but the other part knew better than to doubt anything that happened to her anymore. and it knew she would have to tell chaewon one way or another. even if she didn't owe it to her, she felt like she deserved to know because she was there for her every step of the way. having jake would take this burden off of her shoulders, but y/n was immensely afraid that chaewon would be disappointed in her. how weak was she as a mother to take back the same man who turned his back on their child? very weak. but she wanted nothing more than for her child to be brought up in a warm and loving family with both of its parents because she believed that jake and she would be good ones, regardless of his initial response when he learned of the pregnancy.

"okay," y/n says as she finally gets up. "clean up first, tell chaewon after," she grabs the plates bowl, and utensils from the table as she walked over to the sink. one by one, she rinses the dishes off, one time, two times, three times before she opens the dishwasher to put them inside. she wanted to manually wash, but it would be putting too much pressure on the front of her stomach from having to reach over the sink for that long, so she reluctantly used the machine. after she finished that, she got the broom and began sweeping the floor. being too lazy to mop, she resorted to sweeping the living up as she did what she could to slow time down. but doing chores wasn't easy with her stamina, so after around 20 minutes of stalling, she decided to plop down on the couch and text her friend.

upon receiving y/n's message chaewon raises an eyebrow, but types out a reply nonetheless. she figured it was something important or something that was bothering because usually y/n would call. as she made her way to the car, she let her unspoken anxiousness run rampant through her mind about what could possibly be bothering her friend. while y/n stared at chaewon's notification, all that could be heard in the silent living room was the tapping of y/n's foot. she clicked her phone off, taking a deep breath as she waited for a few minutes.

telling chaewon about the situation proved to be easier than y/n's doubts had originally convinced her it would be. of course, chaewon's expressions showed hesitance for the whole ordeal, but at the end of the day she knew it wasn't her choice to make. and even though she wanted to beg her not to let him come back so easily, she offered her hand in support. and jake proved to be thankful; the day they all decided to meet up at y/n and jake's new shared apartment for some final touches, he conveyed his gratitude to chaewon. he thanked her for everything in the book that he could think of, especially for taking care of her in place of him and for staying by her side through it all.

"you know," jake said to chaewon as they looked at y/n's sleeping figure on the bed. she'd gotten tired after her day of fun with them. she'd just knocked out mid laughter, resulting in her innocent slumber while the other two conversed. "it's times like this where i wish i stayed. most guys, when they find out their girl is pregnant, just run off and marry her before the bump even starts showing, but me? i ran off like a deadbeat and hid in my bedroom scared. i should've been a man and stepped up to be a father sooner. you know, i saw her again, like- pregnant at a target. just shopping alone. i know how people think out here, i saw how people were looking at her before i came to her side. i can't imagine how much she had to endure before then. i feel so guilty. like i don't deserve to be here."

chaewon listened intently to his words, seeing the way he teared up over it. she hesitantly reached out to hold her hand on top of his, that action alone feeling like betrayal as he stiffened upon her touch, but she only wanted to comfort him. she swallowed before she spoke. "it's too late to change the past, you're here now."

"yeah. i suppose you're right," he removes his hand from hers as he nods and she didn't know why it upset her as much as it did. clearing her throat, she got up from the bed. "i should go now, right? it's late and i have class tomorrow," she smiles softly patting her pants to smoothen them. jake nods and gets up as well as he says "i'll walk you to the door."

"oh! that's not necessary," chaewon shakes her head, but he insists as he follows her to the door.

"i have to lock you out, so either way i have to come out here," he says, making her mentally face palm at herself. she'd read too much into the situation of course. it was silent as she walked out the door, turning around with her hands clasped together. jake raises an eyebrow silently. "hm?"

"her due date is coming soon. i'm going to step down from being her main support from now on. i want to prioritize my life now, so please fulfill that empty spot for me," she says, walking away before he could muster up a reply.

-

y/n's screams of pain filled the room as the doctors did everything in their power to talk her through the birth. her grip on jake's hand was painful, but he endured it because she was probably feeling worse than he was.

"that's it, ms.l/n, we can see the baby's head poking through now, just keep pushing, keep breathing," doctor kim says, but nothing registers to y/n as she keeps her eyes squeezed shut, tears flowing down her face as she sobs out.

"chaewon!! chaewon-ah, it hurts s-so bad," she brings her free hand to cover her eyes, wiping what she could. jake stays silent, only offering her a chaste kiss on top of her head, then on one of her tear stained cheeks. he couldn't be upset in a moment like this. right now, all he wanted to do was comfort her until this passed through.

"almost there and .... it's a boy!" hearing her son's cries fill the air was the first thing to bring her back to life. her soul felt like it was floating outside of her body until that point, but hearing the first sounds he's been able to make since leaving her womb, pulled her all the way back in. and feeling him in her arms for the first time made all of the pain and hardships she faced worth it. "jaemin," she whispered to the baby boy, whose cries seemed to subside once he felt his mother's touch. "you'll take the 'jae' from your father," jake's ears perked up as soon as he heard it. "look jaeyun," she turned to him with a smile. he looked down to see their baby, sleepily cooing while they both looked at him with nothing but adoration in their eyes.

"he's beautiful," was all jake could think to say. and it was true, jaemin was beautiful. even though he was covered in gunk and y/n's blood, he was beautiful. doctor kim watched silently for a few minutes before she felt it was alright to take jaemin away to wash him up.

"don't worry, i will bring him back to you after you all get your deserved rest, it was a long 15 hours, but you did it!"

"mhm, i sure did do it," y/n said, her eyes fluttering while she tried her best to stay awake during her tired state. after the doctor left with jaemin, jake wasn't sure of what to do. he scratched the back of his neck, sitting down in a chair while y/n closed her eyes. the room was a comfortable silence at that point, y/n's small breaths bringing the calm to a maximum. "jake?" she whispered, not thinking to speak louder through her drowsiness as jake looked up from his phone over to her. "yeah?"

"can you please sleep with me?"

his heart raced as he looked at her.

"yeah."

-

"that's a good boy, that's a good boy," jake tickled jaemin's stomach as the 4 month old baby boy cooed, using his small hands in an attempt to grab at his father's.

"he's not a dog jake," chaewon giggled as she watched the two boys. she sat on the couch next to y/n who was lying down, her back facing the group.

"hey, babies can be good boys too," jake argued in his baby voice, his attention still being on the baby he was rocking slightly in his arms

"that's fair," chaewon agreed, rubbing her stomach upon its sudden growling. "you guys hungry?" she asked, opening up her phone to ubereats.

"eh, i could eat," by now jake had gotten bored of standing up, instead he sat down with jaemin whose head was now being held up by the crease in jake's elbow while he sat at a respectable distance from chaewon.

"me too," chaewon says as she scrolls through the tabs on the app, being pulled in by all the food options that it offered. she hummed and slightly turned her head over to y/n who only remained silent, eyes focused on the closed curtains of their living room window. "how about you, y/n?"

letting her eyes focus on multiple spots of the room in front of her, it almost felt like she was searching her surroundings for an answer. but there was none. "i'm not hungry," she finally chose to respond before it was too obvious that she was still avoiding speaking.

"aw c'mon since when are you not hungry? you should be taking advantage of being able to eat whatever you want now that jaemin's outside of your body!" chaewon says, lightly nudging her friend's body, though the girl still didn't respond.

"well..." jake's voice suddenly piped into the conversation. "she's breastfeeding, so she still has to be cautious of the nutrients and junk she gets. can't have our baby being unhealthy, now can we?"

now it was jake's turn to be nudged. "aw c'mon, he'll be fine with a little tacos in his baby system! i'll order some now, matter of fact," chaewon said as she typed in 'tacos' in the app's search bar.

"alright, but none of that taco bell, we need the organics."

"well you're not gonna find that in korea.."

"fair enough," jake says as he gets up from his seat on the couch. "let's just go get some. y/n needs some alone time with jaemin anyways, we've basically stolen him away from her. isn't that right, baby?" he says, booping the boy's nose. he walks over to y/n, gently moving her shoulder in a way that would lay her on her back. she closed her eyes, not wanting to look at him as he placed jaemin on her, a heavy feeling forming in her stomach. he pouts, sympathizing with her tiredness as he places a kiss on both her and jaemin's head. "we'll be back," he says as he and chaewon quietly head out.

she only opens her eyes after she hears the door shut and lock. looking down, she sees jaemin fighting sleep as he is so at peace with her warmth, and it's only then that she's brought back to reality. the guilty feeling she would always get once she would hold him would come back again and she begins to ask herself why she was feeling the way she was.

carefully, she maneuvers herself so that she can hold him properly in her arms with a sigh. "god damn it, jaemin. why am i like this? i don't hate you, i know i don't. but why does it feel like this sometimes?" his lack of understanding towards her words makes her feel a little better, he dribbles and gives her a gummy as she kisses the top of his head. "i'm sorry, baby. i don't like feeling like i can only love you when it's just the two of us alone. this isn't how a mother should feel. you deserve better than me." closing her eyes, she slightly sways her body to become a human rocking chair to soothe him more than her warmth could do on its own.

"can you believe it's only been four months since he's been born?" although jaemin was nearing half a year of being with them now, jake already loved the boy enough to be able to talk about him nonstop for hours on end. he even went back to work early just to be able to brag about how healthy and strong his son would turn out to be. there'd even be nights where he and y/n would sleep with jaemin, and she'd wake up to see him have his back facing her, while jaemin would be carefully cuddled up to him on the other side. it was no secret that he loved his baby so much at times it'd be suffocating, for y/n at least. even when their parents came over to visit, they'd joke and say he must have been the one to give birth to jaemin instead of y/n.

even now, as the couple lay in bed, it felt awkward for jake not to have jaemin with them. it had been a mutual decision of theirs to have him sleep in his crib as sleeping in between two very active sleepers could potentially be dangerous. even now as they both faced each other, faces being dimly lit by their tv, his mind seemed to stay focused on the baby who was asleep in the next room as the smile on his face never faltered. y/n looked into his eyes, smiling back. she felt at ease being able to be so close with him without having to worry about keeping distance between their bodies for the sake of jaemin. it was refreshing. but she thought it'd be better if he would shift his focus to her, even if it was just for tonight. after these four long months of neglect, it's the least he could do for her.

yet, somehow his conversation regarding the boy never seemed to end. so, taking matters into her own hands, he put a finger to his lips, giggling as he finally grew silent. "you have work in the morning. sleep," she says, and he nods, the smile on his face staying the same.

"i must be keeping you awake huh?"

y/n hummed in response, using her thumbs to gently caress his face as he melted into her touch. "okay, then let's sleep," he said, gently removing himself from her hold so that he was laying on his back as sleep seemed to come over him quickly. she guessed it was easier to tire when it came to her. she turned her back to face him as she reminisced the days he would stay up and talk to her. she so naively thought that moving in together would bring them closer; it wouldn't be surprising if she woke up to an empty spot in the bed when she'd wake up later.

-

"i'm happy you're here, but you shouldn't have switched to online classes just to be able to see me everyday," y/n said as she changed jaemin's diaper, the boy kicking his chubby feet at her in protest to the cold baby wipe she swiped on his bum as she attempted to rid him of his potty mess.

"oh please," chaewon says as she waves a ringing teddy bear in front of the baby's face to offer a distraction for y/n to finish more smoothly. "going in person was only fun because you were there, plus i love that i have more time to see my best friend and my beautiful nephew!"

"he is beautiful, isn't he?" she said as she put the boy in his diaper, his hiss of fits finally coming to an end as she rocked him back and forth in her arms. "he looks so much like his daddy, too."

"well, i see the both of you in him," chaewon says, laying on her shoulder with a content sigh. "it's so crazy how much he's matured since he came back. i honestly held a grudge against him, but now i think you caught the stars with him. he's an amazing father," chaewon finishes, raising an eyebrow when she hears a small sigh coming from her friend. "what's wrong?"

y/n's complaint is simple. when chaewon asks her, she admits, "he's a good father, and he takes such good care of jaemin, of course, but i just wish he'd take care of me too, you know? he used to have real life feelings for me, now it just feels like i'm nothing more than a mother to him, now that he's a father." she prayed to god that she didn't sound jealous of her own baby. how pathetic that would be of her.

"baby... i'm sure this is just a first time parent thing. he's excited about the baby you guys made. i would be too, i mean, look at him! he's adorable," her eyes scan the baby's features, smiling softly at the sight before her. "don't forget what you feel for him too, though, okay? you love jaemin that much too, right?" it was something y/n never thought about. deep down she knew she had to love jaemin. she knew somewhere inside her heart that she adored him, and there were even times where she wanted to spend every waking moment with him, but she wasn't happy. or at least not in the way she thought she would be.

when she was first pregnant with jaemin, all she could ever think about was how badly she wanted to hold him. how badly she wanted to meet him and love him the way she knew best, but nothing she ever did with him felt like the magic she wanted. if anything, she was pretty miserable all the time. all the responsibility was pushed onto her, nobody else dealt with his crying, nobody else fed him, changed his diaper, anything. everyone got the luxuries of being around him while she did all the work.

she hated it, but that's what she was supposed to do, isn't it? she was supposed to care for her child while jake went to work to make sure they all got fed & taken care of. she couldn't possibly expect chaewon to pitch in, it wasn't her child. but she felt lonely, and even though it hurt her physically, mentally, emotionally, she couldn't just stop taking care of the boy. he was her responsibility. no matter what she did.

and she tried so hard to not direct those malice feelings towards him, but there's a big part in her brain that blames him. chaewon notices the silence and it tells her everything she knows. "a lot of things can happen to your emotions postpartum, y/n. there is help that you can get to get you through this. don't be mad at yourself for feeling sad, it's normal."

"yeah... i'm sorry. i just don't know how to cope with this stuff." chaewon shakes her head fondly and pulls the girl into a side hug, patting her back gently until she lets go again.

"don't be. i'll look into getting you help, but for now i'll look for temporary remedies." she smiles and kisses her cheek affectionately, pulling away once more before walking out of the room. "get some rest. we can talk more later, okay?"

y/n nods silently and watches her walk out of the room, deciding to put the baby to sleep in his room before she goes into her own to do the same.

chaewon's temporary remedy was one of the best gifts y/n could have ever wished for. it took some days, but she convinced jake to take y/n out on a proper date. after 4 months of solely focusing on raising the baby, the two of them are finally getting some alone time together. and y/n could not be any happier. he scheduled a shorter work day so they could go out sooner, and she spent the whole day getting ready. she had lost half of the baby weight, and due to the practices she followed to recover from the birth, her body looked almost the same as it had pre-pregnancy. she did her makeup as best as she could, threw on a matching velvet two-piece, and she even deep cleaned the house so it would look and smell good when he would arrive home.

when he came home, he barely had time to hug her and admire the way she looked as her hands were both already occupied. one hand held jaemin's sleepover bag, while the other held the sleepy baby in his car seat. raising his eyebrow, she only offered him a smile. "i'm ready whenever you are," she said, but he only laughed.

"i have to get ready too," he said, walking into the direction of the bedroom to do just that. the home was silent apart from the shower sounds as she sat on the couch. jaemin was in his cradle playing with the mobile that hung above his head. she didn't know exactly how much more patient she could be. now that she knew what the night had in store for her, she couldn't stop thinking about it; that made the wait so much more difficult to endure.

it felt like hours before jake came out of their room. his jet black hair was parted in the middle, partially slicked back on one side while his outfit consisted of a silk maroon button up with silk black pants and black loafers. her eyes couldn't help but widen as she looked at him. yep. they needed to leave fast. in the blink of an eye, she was carrying both jaemin and his bag, following closely behind jake as they walked to the car.

the drive was quiet as jaemin had fallen asleep in the back. jake's focus was on the road, while y/n's eyes were on him. after they dropped jaemin off at chaewon's place the plan was to go out to eat, but as they approached the highway that would lead to where the closest restaurants were, y/n started feeling a heavy feeling in her stomach.

"um, jake?" she says, lightly putting her hand on his shoulder. he turns his head slightly to glance at her before turning his attention back to the road. "how hungry are you? like hungry hungry, or just 'eh, i guess i could eat' kinda hungry?" she asks, making him cock and eyebrow.

"the second i guess, why? are you not hungry?" he asks, finally being able to turn to her when they hit a red light. she nods without saying anything. "not gonna lie, i went through hell getting that reservation. eating just a little won't hurt, right?"

"i'm sorry but my stomach hurts really bad..."

"y/n," jake says, pulling over to the side of the road so he could look at her while they spoke. "do you just not want to eat?" she doesn't speak back this time. he sighs, rubbing his temples as his other hand grips on the wheel. "fine. we don't have to go, i'm not doing this with you tonight," he says, his tone void of anything, but she could tell he was annoyed. he turns the car back on and pulls back onto the road, looking for the nearest place to turn around. this time, the quietness of the ride was uncomfortable. she didn't want to be in it, but she was afraid to speak; she wouldn't know what to say anyways.

instead of taking the route that would lead them home, he takes a turn that would lead to where they had come from: chaewon's house to which y/n begs him not to. "why are we going to chaewon's house?" she asks.

"we're picking jaem up?" he says like it's the most obvious answer.

"please no!" her voice was desperate, more desperate than he needed to hear. "it's just- i don't know when we'll ever get time like this again. i don't want to lose out. please."

"okay."

he takes a left, starting the journey to go their way home. his speed is faster than normal. she notices and doesn't like it, but she does her best to ignore it since she was getting what she wanted in the end. when they walked into their shared home, she was glad she cleaned up nicely because the atmosphere felt calmer than it would have been if the house was still a baby mess.

y/n thought she'd feel better, but her mood only worsens when she realizes jake still is upset. he goes over to the couch, flopping backwards onto it as he rested his head on the head of it. he unbuttons the first few buttons of his shirt with a sigh. she walks over to him with extreme caution, sitting next to him.

"are you alright?"

he just shrugs, mumbling under his breath, "this was pointless, if we were just gonna come back home." she purses her lips, biting back a frown.

"not completely pointless! it's nice to get a break from being a parent once in a while."

"for who?" he responds, "i have no problem being a parent, do you?" he turns to her, a look in his eyes daring her to say something. and it should make her intimidated, but for some reason it only blows her off the edge she was already doing her best to stay balanced on.

"would i be such a villain to say i do?!" she finally screams at him, the sudden change in volume catching him by surprise. "jesus christ, jake. i just don't get what's so special about him." her words spew a hatred she didn't know she could have at her own child and it angers jake more than any angry words could possibly explain.

"him? HIM?!? you mean our child?!?!"

y/n dodges the question as tears start to flow down her face. he looks at her in disbelief as he gets up from where he's sitting to walk away to create some space between them, but she only follows behind him, her built up frustrations finally clawing their way out her throat as she spoke. "all you care about is him; you're becoming nothing more than a dad, now and it's so. fucking. miserable!"

"well what the fuck do you want me to do, y/n?" he slams his fist against the wall, making her flinch. a split second of humanity was able to hit him again as he pinched his temples, a deep sigh being exhaled. "i'm not going back to being a deadbeat. i'm not going back to feeling burdened by my own decision. he's my son. our son."

"yes, jake. believe me. i know he's yours," she pauses, the lump forming an unbearable pain in her throat as she opens her mouth to speak again. "but am i?" she wanted to be strong. in all the scenarios where she had imagined she would be able to express her feelings, she was sure she'd be strong. it wasn't a phrase she had intentionally practiced for the hundreds of what-ifs her brain conjured, but it was the only sentence that could convey the hurt she had been feeling in her heart.

she cleared her throat, deciding not to let the silence last a second more. "aren't i supposed to be loved, too? don't i matter, too?" her attempt to keep her composure crumbled as she broke out into sobs. she knew it was supposed to hurt, but did it have to hurt this bad? she'd endured this feeling of unbelonging for such a long time, the least her heart could do was make it hurt less.

"y/n-" she hears him interrupt himself with a sigh as he walks towards her, pulling her into an embrace and resting his head on hers. he didn't know how to comfort her. there wasn't an easy way to put into words everything he felt for her, especially since it all came with emotions he didn't fully understand. "you matter so much to me. so fucking much, y/n. more than i can ever explain." he wrapped his arms around her tighter and she returned his affection, burying her head in his shoulder.

"please promise me that you mean it. please promise you won't forget about me " her voice wavered as she spoke, and he noticed how badly she was shaking. he wanted so badly to tell her how he felt, but he didn't know where he stood. they were never together. even if they both loved each other, it was never expressed because their situation didn't allow them to in the past. now things had changed, and he didn't know how they were gonna handle it.

"i promise." he whispered, hoping it would be enough.

she pulled away, wiping the tears from her face as she looked up at him. he gently smiled down at her, placing his hand on the side of her cheek, brushing her hair back from her face. she leans forward, wrapping her arms around him as she looked him in the eye. he smiled down at her, heart beating faster as he swallowed all his fears to express himself. "i love you, y/n, i'm sorry for pulling away instead of accepting it." the words caught her off guard, this was the first time he'd ever said such a thing to her. and it was better than she could've ever imagined.

tears spilled from her eyes as her lip quivered, she nodded understanding before pulling him into a kiss. she didn't know how long it'd been since they last kissed and it lasted only a second before she pulled away. "i love you too jake."

in an instant, his lips were back on hers, only pulling away long enough for him to look her in the eyes with a smirk as he asked "oh, do you?" their kiss grew sloppy as he lightly wrapped his hand around her neck, guiding her to the couch as he maneuvers himself so that he's sitting first. he pulls her on his lap, hands making their way to her waist as she grinded her hips against his growing erection, letting her tongue slip through his lips as he began sucking on it. he moved his hands up, fumbling with the zipper on her top before zipping it down fully. once he'd done that, she slipped out of it, her breasts falling down with a bounce before he latched his lips onto one of them, sucking slightly before releasing it with a loud pop.

there was no need to rush this time, they had the house all to themselves. their kiss lasted what felt like hours, only the sound of lips smacking and clothes rubbing against each other could be heard. jake pulls back for air, moving to unbutton his shirt. she only watches him intently wondering how he could make a simple action so, so sensual. he notices her stares and he likes it. his dick twitches and he realizes that, though the kissing and grinding is amazing, he wanted more. so much more.

"you gonna put those pretty lips to use or are we just gonna play around all night?" he asks making her eyes widen in excitement as she moves off of his lap to lay on the couch, unbuttoning and unzipping his pants before pulling them down to his mid thigh as she immediately latched her lips around the tip of his cock.

he sucks in a breath as she swirls her tongue around it, scooting down in his spot as he relaxed under her touch. "yeah, just like that," he praises as he pushes her head down so she can take in all of his length, fucking deeply into her mouth, not allowing her to come up even when she tapped on his thigh, gagging around him. "mmm, that's right." he finally let her come up to breathe, moving his hand to notify her that he wanted her to take control. she used the spit around his cock to her advantage as she let her mouth sink down until she felt his tip hit the back of her throat, doing her best to keep bobbing her head that way.

he hums and pats her butt, lifting her hip slightly to tell her to lift it more into the air. he does his best to pull her skirt off, letting her wiggle her way out of it, standing on her knees as he moves her panties to the side as he dipped his fingers into her wetness, adding two fingers. he sped up his thrusts, adding another finger as she kept going, teasingly stopping every time she would moan to the point of being inaudible. her legs started to shake as she resorted to only sucking the tip as she couldn't suck him any better with the way she couldn't stop moaning.

"get up and ride me," he tells her. she quickly obeys and inserts him inside of her, hopping up and down as she does her best to ride him, though her speed is slow. he smacks her ass, squeezing it harshly before spreading her cheeks apart. "good girl.. do you like making daddy feel good?" he asks as he grabs her chin and pulls her in for a kiss, this time letting it turn french. she moans into it, the lengths of his cock hitting her g-spot without fail every time she'd drop down. it made her speed and movement falter forcing him to grab her by her ass, lifting her body higher as he begins fucking into her, leaving her an absolute mess as she entangles her fingers into his hair breaking the kiss to moan in her ear.

"you feel so fucking good around me, but now's not the time to be a pillow princess," he again still praises as she tries to meet his thrusts. she has to take her hands out of his hair as she grips her nails into his shoulder, unable to fully process the pleasure her body was taking in. with the way her pussy clenched around him partnered with the pain from her fingernails digging into his skin, he couldn't help but be vocal about it. "you just wanna get pregnant again huh? you want me to fuck my seed into you again? you want me to reclaim this pussy? huh? you like that?"

squeezing her eyes shut, y/n just couldn't hold back anymore as she falls apart on top of him her first orgasm taking over all her senses, legs trembling from the feeling as she starts babbling between moans. he laughs as she rests her head on his shoulder, words still not forming correctly. "spit it out," he says as he slows his thrusts down ever so slightly so she could speak. she didn't know what came over her as she moaned out again, another orgasm hitting her as she came undone once again. she looks at him with a fucked out expression and says "faster."

his dick twitches as he complies, pounding deeper into her, feeling cocky, and only speeding up as he speaks praises into her ear. "you're so good to me, fuck y/n. you're gonna have to deal with me forever.. i'm not letting anyone even dream of having a chance with you. you're mine, all mine you understand?" she nods. "keep letting me fuck you like this and you're gonna be my wife sooner."

hearing this makes her moan louder as she smashes her lips on his, he keeps his speed, sometimes thrusting all the way in, staying there for a second too long for her liking, just to drive her crazy as she comes undone another time, finally making him start reaching his own pleasure limit. he doesn't change his speed or actions as he finally buries himself deep inside of her as he filled her with his hot seed. "you're mine," he says as she falls limp on top of him in exhaustion. she smiles and for the first time in months, she felt all the weight lifted off of her shoulders.

"all yours."

end.

#enhypen imagines #enhypen scenarios #enhypen x female reader #enhypen x reader #enhypen x you #enhypen smut #kpop smut #jake x reader #jake x fem reader #enhypen jake #enhypen jake smut #jake smut #jake scenarios #jake angst #jake imagines #enhypen angst

[svaints]

May I request something small for Rollo giving kisses that gradually turn to hungry ones?

I'm hyperventilating...🎀

𝕽𝖔𝖑𝖑𝖔 𝕱𝖑𝖆𝖒𝖒𝖊 | 𝖓𝖘𝖋𝖜

𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫: 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐧𝐞𝐮𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐥

𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬: 𝐊𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐏𝐡𝐲𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐨𝐮𝐜𝐡, 𝐓𝐨𝐩!𝐑𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐨 × 𝐁𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐦!𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫, 𝐃𝐫𝐲 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐠

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: 𝐀𝐮𝐜𝐮𝐧! (𝐍𝐨𝐧𝐞)

"Quit moving away, I'm not done with you yet." He spoke with heavy pants while his hand moved to the back of my head and kissed me again, his body pressing mine against the counter...my head feeling light headed, I'm surprised with how much stamina he has to keep going..

We weren't doing much but studying for final exams and everyone was stressed out, overwhelmed with the idea of not passing especially since our scores were going to be sent to our future universities we're planning to attend to.

"Wake up." I hear as I open my eyes feeling my shoulder being nudged on until he sees I'm awake. "This wouldn't happen if you slept your hours y'know." As much as I wanted to comeback with something, an excuse, I couldn't because he was right. I had stayed up reading a few...."books" until 3 am.

"We've been studying for three hours could we not get a break?" My head continued to lay on my arms while he thought about it, his gaze down to meet mine and then the papers on the table with our study guides. He sighed closing his eyes, "I suppose. We'll study again in 15 mins." Rollo softened a bit trying to be less tense and worried but he couldn't. He was a perfect A+ student passing effortlessly but this test determined his entire future career. It was like that for everyone.

I see his eyes staring down his lap, seated in silence until he looked at me, "Am I being hard on you?" His facial expression was blank but his eyes showed worry as if he was holding me with the same standards he held himself to.

"No, you're not..you just want what's best for me." My posture straightened to lean closer and hold his hand assuring him that was the case. His lips curved to a smile as he exhaled to relax.

"Yes, I do, but that's not a reason to push you as much as I do to myself. You have your limits and boundaries dear.." I didn't like it when he worried too much, it got him anxious even if he didn't express it or allowed me to see it, I knew it was a lot to keep under control for him.

All I did was stand up and stretch a bit, "Let's grab something to eat, we only have 10 minutes, everything's okay." He gave a nod and a smile before following me to my kitchen.

We had fruit cups while standing up to avoid sleeping or becoming too relaxed since we still had five more sections of the test to study for. I leaned on the counter a bit and began thinking about those books I read yesterday, my cheeks suddenly flushing red at the thought of the one page that had me kicking my legs at how new I was to the experience.

"Are you okay? You're face is red." He asked throwing his cup away, finished and washed his hands. I could only nod assuring him it was nothing before thinking, "Ro...what do you know about stress relievers?"

He turned to look at me and then down before walking over, drying his hands. "They're obviously to calm down and have you in a more peaceful state of mind. There's a lot one can to relieve stress. Why?"

"I was wonder if you'd allow me to do show you one that I was interested in trying..." I was going to go by the book, lame, boring honestly but it was my first time actually putting it to action....

With an eyebrow raised, he gave a nod. I came closer, tip-toed and pressed my lips against his, eyes closed and my hands holding his wrists.

My heart raced feeling his lips on mine, they were surprisingly soft and tasted like cherry chap stick unless it was mine but who knew since it was mid-winter.

I pulled away, opening my eyes and saw his beat red cheeks as he looked at me surprised, he looked upset to me. I thought I may have crossed a boundary, making me feel guilty. "I'm sorry..."

"Why'd you stop?" He asked coming closer, was he more offended I had pulled away than suddenly kissing him??? "I thought it made you uncomfortable.."

Needless to say, I didn't.

We went from taking a 15 min break from studying to having his hands gripping my sides, pressing me against the counter I was leaning on. My hands on his chest while he made sure there wasn't a gap between us.

His tongue was pushed into my mouth making sure he was taking control of the situation by holding the back of my head to angle it better without being harsh.

I let out a small whine once he began getting bolder, sliding his hand up my shirt to caress my breast. I moved my head away to get some air until he stopped and frowned.

"Quit moving away, I'm not done with you yet." He spoke with heavy pants while his hand moved to the back of my head and kissed me again, his body pressing mine against the counter...my head feeling light headed, I'm surprised with how much stamina he has to keep going..

Small groans of pleasure escaped from him, our bodies feeling the heat of the situation.

I could tell the session was getting the better of him once he began pressing his hips on mine, the layers of clothes he had in the way of his desire.

If we were to ever get further, I didn't want to do it here. Especially with the window curtains open for anyone to see. He stopped again panting and leaned his chin over my shoulder holding me tightly, "You're fun to kiss..." He spoke breathlessly.

My cheeks flushed more before cupping his face and kissed him again going fully into it as I began trying to undress him already despite saying I didn't want to do it here before.

He took me to my room to continue getting visibly impatient out of nowhere as he layed us down and climbed over me to take everything off.

His hat, tassels, shirt and clothing along with a few more items scattered on the floor. My clothes mixed with his.

I was only left with my bra and panties while he had his last layer of clothing on still. His hips rythimically moving against mine as we made out, his hands gripping the sides of my waist rocking my body. I could feel how desperate he was, how hard it was.

Our kisses became sloppy once we were near climax. Now thinking about it, it would've been better with out the last few layers of our clothes but we had an exam to study for and we were only trying to take the stress away dry humping one another.

He looked down at me with so much love and desire trying to satisfy his needs and mine, making sure I was the one enjoying it above all.

Before we knew it, he had jerked his hips up mine holding on to me tight as we came.

His breath was heavy petting my hair and moving it away from my face. I hugged him nuzzling into his neck. "Do we really have to study?" I asked looking at him, pleading we continue.

He thought about it before letting out a small laugh, "Let's just relax a bit.."

We ended up holding on another exhausted, soon falling asleep forgetting about studying. I know we're doubling the hours now that I side tracked him...

꒰ঌ໒꒱

𝐼 𝑚𝑎𝑦 ℎ𝑎𝑣𝑒 𝑡𝑎𝑘𝑒𝑛 𝑙𝑜𝑛𝑔𝑒𝑟 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑓𝑎𝑐𝑡 𝐼 𝑎𝑑𝑑𝑒𝑑 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑡𝑜𝑜𝑘 𝑜𝑓𝑓 𝑚𝑎𝑛𝑦 𝑝𝑎𝑟𝑡𝑠, 𝐼 𝑤𝑎𝑛𝑡𝑒𝑑 𝑖𝑡 𝑡𝑜 𝑏𝑒 𝑑𝑒𝑐𝑒𝑛𝑡 𝑠𝑜 𝑚𝑦 𝑎𝑝𝑜𝑙𝑜𝑔𝑖𝑒𝑠. 𝐼𝑓 𝐼 𝑠ℎ𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑢𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑠, 𝑙𝑚𝑘.

#rollo flamm #the hunchback of notre dame #rollo flamme #twst #disney twst #twst wonderland #twst rollo #rollo flamme twisted wonderland #disney twisted wonderland #twst x y/n #rollo flamme x reader #rollo x reader #twisted wonderland rollo #rollo flamme x yuu #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x yuu #SpellBinded

[mouschiwrites]

Ninjas x reader?

So basically readers dad/mom/wtv is a ex military Sargent who's very overprotective and intimidating. And the ninjas are meeting them for the first time how would they react?

Ooh, I actually like that idea,,, "ex-military parent" is a trope that needs to be used more often tbh

Ninjago - Ninjas When Your Parent is Ex-Military

Cole

He'd be super nervous, but he'd totally ace the first impression

And literally every impression after that

I feel like Cole is just the kind of guy your parents would always love, whether they're strict or laid back, grumpy or cheery—they are going to love him

Maybe it's because he always shows respect

And it's no exception with your parent; if anything, he's extra respectful

Definitely calls them "sir" or "ma'am"

(Honestly he probably does this anyway at first, but he'll do it more consistently with your parent)

Whenever they get all protective over you, he somehow manages to quell their worries without stepping on their toes

Like, if your parent says:

"You know, when we're in public Y/n never leaves my sight."

He'll smile and say:

"That's what I try to do, too. I like to know they're safe."

This technique never fails to satisfy and impress your parent

He seems pretty calm and pleasant when around your parent, and while this is forced at first, it becomes more natural over time

Mostly because your parent starts to relax around him too, easing up on the intimidating glares and snide comments intended as "tests"

Soon enough your parent is actually asking you when you're bringing him home next!

"When are you bringing that Cole boy around again? He's a good kid."

Jay

He is absolutely TERRIFIED to meet your parent when he finds out they're ex-military

He keeps putting off the meeting; little does he know this is making your parent suspicious of him already

You literally have to beg him to meet them, if not for your sake, then for his own

Because you know that the longer he keeps making excuses, the more your parent is going to be biased against him

So when he finally agrees, it's a big relief for you

Not so much for him; he spends every second leading up to the meeting stressing out

What's he gonna wear? What's he gonna say? How should he stand? What if he gets fidgety?

Then it happens: he meets your parent

And he fumbles so hard D:

His bumbling nervousness (which is NOT helped by your parent's intentionally intimidating demeanor) makes him come off as a wuss, which your parent doesn't like

They think Jay can't protect you, which is, like, their #1 requirement for any partner you have

So they totally disapprove of him

That is, until they see him on the news

He somehow failed to mention on your first meeting that he was a ninja; a ninja with powers, no less

So your parent sees him on the news one night, and immediately calls you over

"Is that your boyfriend on the news? Oh my! Did you just see that?? Good gravy!"

"Does this mean you don't hate him now?"

"Hate him? How could I? This kid could take me in a fight! Hell, bring him around again; I've gotta apologize before he comes after me, hah!"

Kai

From what you said about Kai to your parent before they met him, they assumed he was sort of a bad boy

Which they didn't like. At all.

So when they ask you to bring him home, it's almost like a challenge

And that's certainly how Kai sees it; a challenge to prove his worth

So he trains for it

He works out extra hard, practices his smile in the mirror, tests different greetings

It's silly, but you know that he's probably going to need the practice, what with your parent... being like they are

The practice gives him an air of confidence that actually ends up putting your parent off

Everything else was fine; the handshake, calling them "sir/ma'am," asking polite questions...

It was just that smirk, that total lack of nervousness that put a (deeper than usual) scowl on your parent's face

It wasn't that Kai wasn't nervous; he was just hiding it to seem tough

Eventually he starts to break, and his anxiety finally shines through

Your parent realizes that everything he's been doing has been for them, and he wasn't really like that all the time

And then they're just a little impressed; not much, but just enough so that they don't totally hate him

It'll take time for them to warm up to him, and honestly it'll probably take a bit for Kai to warm up to them, too

Your parent will sort of see themselves in Kai: a fiery young person eager for a fight

And from there they'll be besties tbh; they can relate to each other, and they enjoy testing each other's fierceness

Zane

I don't actually think that Zane will be nervous about your parent being ex-military

If he's feeling any anxiety, it's about meeting your parent in general

He doesn't know why them being ex-military would change things; veteran or not, he needs them to like him

But it does give him a hint on how to please them

He spends a lot of time researching the military, trying to come up with topics to discuss

He's also just trying to understand them better

So when you finally meet, he's almost too perfect in the way he conducts himself

He's quite naturally respectful and pleasant, but it's his knowledge about the military that really gets your parent

The questions he asks are so specific that each one makes your parent's brows jump up for half a second in surprise

They're more than happy to answer the question, of course; they're just impressed that he knew to ask

And when he leaves your parent is actually the one asking if he'd like to come over again

Tbh they just want to answer more of his questions

Needless to say, they end up liking him a lot; not as your boyfriend, but as a "nice young man"

It's only after the first meeting that they let the idea that this "nice young man" is your boyfriend set in

The change is visible on their face; they just blink with owlish eyes for a second before clapping you on the shoulder with a grin

"You picked a good one, Y/n! He sure knows his stuff!"

And the more he comes around, the more little details your parent learns to like, from his mannerisms to his personality

They don't even care that he's a robot

He's as human to them as anyone :)

Lloyd

He's pretty scared to meet your parent

His experience with parents was definitely... different

He has no idea what to expect when you tell him that your parent is strict/protective

His parents were about as present in his life as strawberries in an apple pie, so he doesn't really have a sense of what real parenting is like

So just add that to the fact that your parent is like the final boss of seeking parent approval

No matter how much you tell him to just be himself, he's convinced that he needs to act a specific way

He has no idea what that "way" is, but he's certain it exists

Unfortunately he doesn't figure it out by the time he's on your porch knocking on the door

So he's forced to follow your advice

His pleasant, agreeable nature does little to impress your parent

It's not that they don't like him, they just think he's a little... plain

But then they see how he treats you

Lloyd didn't know if showing affection for you was against this obscure idea of "ways to act around parents," but he did it anyway

He was as respectful ever in showing his admiration for you

He called you beautiful and kissed your hand, pulled your chair out for you at the dinner table and everything

He was a total gentleman, as always

This is what got your parent to like him

He wasn't just this plain blonde boy who "fooled" you into dating him; suddenly he was a dazzling gentleman with impeccable manners

This impression might've been a bit exaggerated

I mean, Lloyd is just naturally nice like that; he's not trying to be this "perfect" character

But ultimately that's how your parent sees him, which is better than a bad impression (I guess?)

Nya

She's not scared of your parent

No matter how much they might try to intimidate her, she's unflinching in her demeanor around them

Much like Zane, any anxiety she's feeling is because they're your parent, not because they're ex-military

But I don't think she has any reason to worry

She has a strong personality, with brains, brawn, and that fearless air about her

Your parent is impressed at the way she doesn't even seem to notice their glares

She just keeps smiling her little smile, asking another question to get to know your parent or answering their questions

At first your parent is a little irked by the way they can't seem to get to her, but the more she talks the more they realize that there's a reason behind this

She's a genuine toughie; she's seen enough that she's not scared of much anymore

And that's when your parent decides that they like her

I guess they sort of see themself in her

But they also like the fact that, because she's tough like that, she can protect you

And, just as importantly, she can protect herself

To your parent that means that not only is she going to take care of you, but she's going to take care of herself so that she can always be there for you

So they sort of drop the intimidation tactics

Not all the way, just because that's how they are when it comes to you

Just enough to show Nya that they're warming up to her

And she's totally ecstatic about that!

She knows family is important to you, so to be accepted by your parent is fantastic :D

Thank you for this request!! And thanks for reading, take care doves <33

(divider by saradika)

#ninjago #lego ninjago #ninjago x reader #ninjago headcanons #kai smith #kai smith x reader #kai x reader #nya smith #nya smith x reader #nya x reader #jay walker #jay walker x reader #jay x reader #zane julien #zane julien x reader #zane x reader #cole brookstone #cole brookstone x reader #cole x reader #lloyd garmadon #lloyd garmadon x reader #lloyd x reader

[jesuisici33]

Inspiration Saturday

tagged by @daffi-990 @hippolotamus @disasterbuckdiaz

inspiration comes from the fact that apparently we're getting a crossover with the bachelor???

which made me want to start working on my buddie bachelorette au! snippet under the cut for those interested!

His limo is getting even closer to the mansion where Taylor Kelly is. Honestly he doesn’t know what he was thinking when he agreed with his Tia Pepa to do this show. Eddie’s only thought is that he hopes he gets to go home soon so he can see Christopher. He can deal with the teasing and laughter from his family and coworkers after this airs. As soon as his humiliation is over, the faster he can be back with his son.

The limo stops, and someone comes over to open the door for Eddie to let him out. For a second the only thing he sees are the cameras pointing at him. There’s a rustle from some bushes - probably where Bobby and Athena are hiding to see how Taylor’s interactions with him and all the other men play out tonight - that catches Eddie’s eye. Then he sees her.

Taylor Kelly is…pretty. 

She’s dressed in a long, sparkly purple dress with her hair up in a bun, smiling picture perfect. The short bio of her Pepa read out to him when she was casted resurfaces in his mind. She’s a reporter. Mainly puff pieces - that must be why she has such a Barbie smile. As he gets out of the limo and walks towards her, he doesn’t see any substance towards her. No genuineness in that smile or in the eyes, just selling it for the camera. 

“Hi,” he puts his hand out for her to shake, not knowing what else to do.

Taylor quirks her eyebrow at, head tilting down at his hand. “You sure you don’t want to try that again? I’m sure the crew will let you. You don’t seem too enthused to meet me. My ego is a bit bruised. What’s the story there?”

Feeling slightly caught off guard, Eddie stiffly places his offered hand in his suit pocket. “No - no story. Just not used to cameras being on me.”

Taylor laughs. Eddie thinks it would be a nice laugh. Maybe if they were in private and Taylor’s eyes weren’t shifting towards the camera currently pointed at them. “Well, I hope you get used to them soon! What’s your name, anyways?”

“Edmundo.” He doesn’t know why he gives Taylor his full name. Perhaps because he knows Eddie is reserved to close friends and family. Perhaps because he wants to see Taylor stumble over his full name. 

“Edmundo. I like it. Well, Edmundo-”

She’s cut off by the sound of sirens wailing in the not too far distance. 

One of the contestants is coming in driving a firetruck.

“There’s another firefighter?” Eddie mutters, slightly impressed, slightly annoyed. Impressed because he loves these outrageous stunts during the first meeting on the show. Annoyed because he can’t believe the show paid for an actual fire truck to be used for a stunt that will be used for two seconds of footage. What house allowed this?

“Another?” Taylor’s sharp sense is going to be nauseating, Eddie can already tell.

The man in the truck honks his horn, shouts of “TAYLOR KELLY!!!” followed by whoops and cheers coming out of him. He’s wearing his uniform. Not the full gear, but the more laid back version for non fire emergencies. He’s blond with what appears to be some sort of birthmark next to one of his eyes. A blinding smile that holds the warmth of the sun in it. Eddie can’t help but give a small smile back.

“I heard you were in need of saving.” The man’s dazzling smile turns towards Eddie, where it hardens slightly. A your time’s up clear in his expression.

Eddie doesn’t bother looking back at Taylor. “All yours, man.” 

As he’s walking towards the mansion where the rest of the men are sitting in the lounge area, he thinks he hears something about a firehose, followed by a feminine laugh.

tagging @911-on-abc @eddiebabygirldiaz @monsterrae1 @bonheur-cafe @watchyourbuck @steadfastsaturnsrings @tizniz @loserdiaz @giddyupbuck @theotherbuckley @thewolvesof1998 @pirrusstuff @your-catfish-friend @liminalmemories21 @carlos-in-glasses @wikiangela @wildlife4life @spotsandsocks @diazsdimples and anyone else who is feeling inspired! <3

#911 #911 wip

[masonmiamor]

sunset vows - - mason mount x reader.

gif not mine! 

A quick thank you once again to @masonspulisic for helping me out with the fic and the insta au, linked here! And to @masonm19 who helped me write and get feedback as well!! 

Summary: The anticipated day is here, and you can’t help but share and remember the feelings together along the orange horizon. 

feedback is appreciated! do not copy my work, please and thank you!

“Y/n! It's so great to see you honey!” another cheery voice said for the hundredth time that evening. You hugged and kiss their cheeks greeting them, you showed them the venue before taking a deep breath and sighing. You were at this for almost two hours, at your own wedding, playing as the event organizer but also the bride.

After your party planner got sick three days before your wedding only you and Mason knew what to do and how it would go down. You hadn't sat down or even eaten the entire day as you were in charge of mostly everything, but things were going to plan and that's the only thing that mattered. Mason was now your husband, but he didn't want the stress solely to rely on you, so he had christian to also help, a closest and dearest friend of you two.

“Do you mind taking over? I need to take a breather,” you said to your best friend who quickly nodded and handed you a bottle of water. “Go ahead, take your time, I have things handled,” she gave you a quick hug and helped you re-touch your makeup and change out of your wedding gown to more of a simple but silky dress that fit the evening.

You walked out the double doors to the outdoor area, breathing in the sea air. You and Mason agreed on having your wedding on a small secluded island with your friends and family, trying to keep it private but very special and memorable, and so far it has been. The first night you arrived here together, spending the entire night to early morning reminiscing how you got here today.

“When you first saw me, what was your first thought?” you said, taking a swing of your beer. Mason chuckled and looked at his hands, “I remember thinking you were the most beautiful girl in the room, Like Christmas morning, but I also thought you were with Puli.” You turned to him with your brows drawn in confusion, but a small smile plastered on your face, “What? Actually?”

“Yep. But when he told me he wasn’t with you, I knew it was faith,” he said kissing your temple after. Mason brought you closer and hugged you by your waist, “I remember planning what I would say every time I wanted to talk with you, rehearsing my words, repeating them in my head, and then quickly forgetting them. Christian always reassured me that you were easy and so sweet to talk to” he laughed, “And he was right. He played cupid for us.”

“What about you? What was your first thought?” he asked you, with a cheeky grin on his face, full dimples showing. “Honestly… I didn't know who you were. I just thought you were someone else in the room who was there to have a good time. I just remember thinking you were mysterious, weird, I know. But I caught your gaze many times on me and I wanted to know more of you, and what you did…” you say shyly.

“And look where that got us…” he implied, “Y/n look at me,” Mason grabbed your chin and tilted your head up to face his brown eyes dilating, “I love you so much. This, what we're about to do is the best thing that could ever happen to me. Meeting you has been the most special thing that has happened to me and I would repeat and do it all over again if it's to repeat history with you. Every laugh, kiss, hug, even tears, everything,” he breathed out.

You giggled and closed the gap between, your lips pressing against his softer ones, sinking into his touch slowly. “I love you, Mason. Today. Tomorrow. Forever.”

The second day you had all the inlaws come in, adjusting them into the rented-out homes and villas, the third night was having the bachelor parties, many drinks and games later everyone had passed out on the couch, you and Mason snuck out and watched the moon by the shore. Discussing your future, the plans after the wedding, and much more.

“I want three kids. Two boys and one girl,” Mason says grabbing a bite of the red velvet cake from the bachelor party. “Imagine our kids? Your eyes, my dashing smile, the locks of hair? I can’t wait for it,” Mason gushes. “Me either but I want to be selfish and have time for myself with you first. Kids are a definite answer but right now, let it just be us. And maybe a German shepherd?” you say, giggling when you see the white frosting on the corners of his mouth, dragging your finger to clean it off.

“I want to finish my degree and buy that white Georgian house we drove by the other day. Can you picture us there? With our small family and dog? Maybe own some farm animals? Picture the sunsets and bonfires in the summer, some holidays with our friends and family. I want it with you,” you said watching as Mason kept an intense gaze at you.

“You have me…” Mason whispered, “I'm not going anywhere that isn't with you,” he promises. “That house is guaranteed now. We will spend so many memories together, and cherish them for us to later show our kids,” Mason says. You quietly talk and relish more time as it becomes late.

“I don't want us to go back…” he groaned when looking at the late time. You yawned and covered your mouth, “I don’t either, but we need our sleep for today, baby,” you say, pressing a quick kiss on his lips. “I’m going to have to impatiently and anxiously wait for you for hours… I don't know if I can handle that,” he said hiding his head in the crook of your neck. Clingy Mason was your favorite, but right now you wanted to sleep.

“I'm sure I can maybe sneak out if time allows us,” you say, knowing inside you were just messing and teasing with him. “Really?” he said excitedly, his head quickly coming back up and searching for assurance. “No. No can do. If the girls find out, they’ll kill me. I don't want to show up to the ceremony covered in red, wouldn't be a good look,” you say laughing at his reaction. Mason playfully rolled his eyes, which caused you to laugh harder.

“I’ll be thinking about this…”

All of the friends you brought out help for the big day. Sophia helped with hair and makeup insisting she wanted to do it, Paula and Andrea helped steam the white dress to perfection, and other captured the moment. Christian, who played cupid, made sure Mason wouldn't leave the house he was in as he wanted to see you, he also was the ring bearer and brought the customized rings during the ceremony. It was perfect. Everything.

Now you find yourself here hours later. The sand beneath you felt cool and fresh, the sky appeared in different colors, and you had a sense of warmth inside you as you looked around on the small island. You carried your heels in one hand, feeling the cool breeze as you walked around picking sea shells. “Everything okay?” a familiar voice said behind you. You smiled and looked down before feeling a hug from behind. Mason's cheek rested on the top of your head, breathing in your coconut shampoo and other hair products. “Couldn’t be better,” you replied.

You felt him smile, and then place a small kiss on your blushed cheek, “Come with me, let’s take a breather. I haven’t been able to see or hold you since the church,” he says, interlocking your hands and taking hold of your heels. His once black jacket was off, and now just wearing the white button-up with the buttons undone on top and dress slacks. His hair is messy because of the air blows, but his freckles shine in the golden hour.

“You changed dresses?” Mason asked along the water, you nodded happily, “I did! I didn’t want my gown to get dirty with all the sand here, memory purposes. I got this dress here today,” you let go of his hand and did a small turn, to which he chuckled and hugged you by your waist, his hands guiding down dangerously low.

“It’s beautiful. You’re beautiful,” he breathes out, Mason grabs your left hand and kisses over your knuckles placing a small delicate kiss on your ring finger where both bands appear. Your eyes glim at the soft but intimate gesture, you tiptoe and kiss him, him groaning at the sweet taste along your lips.

“It doesn't feel real, you know?” you say looking out to the orange sky. “It feels like a dream… Today has felt like a dream and I'm scared to wake up that it is,” you joke. He grabs your hand again, “It isn't a dream. It's real baby. Today we officially got married, and it's real. Although this sky isn't…” Mason says following your gaze out. “Gimme your hand,” you say watching as his larger palm reaches out for your touch. “Dance with me,” you say beaming when he pulls you closer, “With pleasure.”

Your hand rest on his chest while his is secured on your waist, your hands interlocked as you move slowly. “You know this technically counts as our first dance,” he points out, you nod not caring, “It does but… take a look” You pause your movements. “Would you rather have this where it's just us two who can relish the precious moment, or have everyone look at you dance nervously?” you continue.

“Are you calling my dancing terrible?” he gasps offended, “I mean… Technically as your wife I vowed to be forever truthful so… yes?” you tease watching his mouth grow open. He picks you up and spins you in a circle, hearing your giggles grow louder and then the pleads to stop. “Take it back,” he says setting you down, you shake your head and cross your arms, “I love you but no,” you shrug your shoulders.

After a bicker of back and forth, he takes out the disposable camera and takes pictures of you. Mason's chest feelings soft and cold, his heart beating fast as he watches you smile and laugh, he knows it's real. He watches as you fix your hair, tugging and adjusting the dress, posing from one side to another, he knows it's real.

Your heart beats out your chest as you observe your husband roll up his sleeves to take pictures, after all these years he never fails to make you nervous even if it's the smallest movement. The chilling feeling along your spine when you bring the camera to your eye, adjusting the lighting before clicking the button to capture the moment. You know it's real when he runs towards you, grabbing the camera and facing it up to take the picture of both of you.

His pearly white teeth and dimples pop as he captures another shot, his hair is a full-on mess but it looks so adorable and so him. You walk hand in hand back to the reception, laughing when a worried Christian walks out the double doors. “What's wrong? It looks like you've seen a ghost,” Mason jokes, Christian giving him an “Are you serious look” at him.

“I cannot possibly deal with another person asking me why I'm single, or if it's okay for them to put me on their daughter,” he speaks his hands thrown in the air. “Why don't the two of you come back, and finally make the awaited Mr. and Mrs. Mount appearance?” he suggests with a forced smile.

“I love you both but it will get out of control if people don’t notice the newlyweds are there… Kai keeps having to tell everyone you're getting ready-” Christian continues to ramble, you take his hands and tell him to breathe. “We were just coming back, I can't thank you enough for helping the both of us out today. We can wait for you to take a breather and then start. How does that sound?” Mason says coming next to you to pat him on the back. “I don't need a breather… I need a drink and to find my date” Christian says chuckling. The trio walks inside, and Christian disappears with his date after finding her by the bar.

“Ready Mrs. Mount?” Mason says kissing the back of your palm. “Ready than ever,” you give him a quick kiss, suddenly becoming nervous about the walk. “It'll be okay. Just follow my lead, I'm right here,” he whispers in your ear calming you down. You hear the DJ call out on the “Now please, give a round of applause to Mr. and Mrs. Mount,” and tighten your grip on Mason’s hold.

“I love you, handsome. Today. Tomorrow. Forever.”

click here for the full insta au!!

not my au credits to @masonspulisic !!! all her doing 🤭💕💕

#mason mount imagine #mason mount one shot #mason mount x reader #mason mount x y/n #mason mount blurb #mm19