#like. both him and my great aunt are in middling health and he jumps all over the place in conversations now

[adventures-in-poor-planning]

On Saturday I hung out with my 84-year-old ecologist great uncle and he stopped in mid-conversation (abt the return of the whooping crane) and very seriously told me that "you can go one of two ways, as a naturalist"; either you keep sight of the hopeful possibilities, or you don't. I'm one of nature's wretched little pessimists but when an old ecologist literally holds your hands in his and tells you, "don't despair," you have to try, I feel.

#I'm not doing the scene justice i genuinely wanted to cry #like. both him and my great aunt are in middling health and he jumps all over the place in conversations now #but he was very serious about that bit #nature tag #;-;

[untaemedqueen]

The Lions Den

Mafia!Jimin x Wife!Reader

Genre: Mafia!AU, Smut, Fluff, Angst

Chapter 7.

Warnings: Smut, Blood, Guns, Knives, Excessive Cursing, Excessive Alcohol Intake, Smoking (Cigarettes and Cigars), Mental Health Issues

TagList- @ayyyocee​​​​​​​​​​, @mysugabear03, @wisebtsgot7prune​​​, @imaforeigner​​​​​​​​​​, @yeonkiminnie​​​​​​​​​​​, @stories1907​​​​​​​​​​​, @ppersonna​​​​​​​​​​​, @brilee64​​​​​​​​​​​, @gooplibrary​​​​​​​​​​​, @vivpurple7​​​​​​​​​​, @xjoonchildx​​​​​​​​​​, @brightwingr5​​​​​​​​​​, @yaniposts22​​​​​​​​​​, @rjsmochii​​​​​​​​​​, @taeslittletiger​​​​​​​​​​, @pjmcth​​​​​​​​​​, @bts-chub​​​​​​​​​​, @kpoppingthempills​​​​​​​​, @kim-ji-hyeons-world​​​​​​​​, @jikooksgirl19​​​​​, @yoong-i​​​​​, @ruinsofangels​​​​​, @absolutefantrash​​​​, @chiminies-noona​​​​, @eclectically-esoteric​​​, @itsbreeeeeeee, @septembersjoon​​

Sequel to The Bird Cage

To say that you were nervous was an understatement. Hoseok gave very little information over the phone to Yoongi apart from the fact that during the Ims encounter with Jeongguk at the warehouse he had bitten off his own tongue during their scuffle. So there was very little chance that the Im would have been able to tell the mafia family anything at all. Hoseok had found him on the side of the road in a thicket of bushes, bleeding out of his mouth.

Upon arriving home, Jimin was pacing in the sitting room. Hands over his face before hearing the door slam shut. He picks his head up before narrowing his eyes at you, “And where were you three?” He questions as your nephew, Jisuk runs through the sitting room with Jin hot on his trail. 

“At the Bird Cage, handing over the reins to Rina.” You tell your husband as you step down the entryway stairs. He hums before opening his arms for you like a small child. You can see his anxiousness quite clearly, his aura was exuding this sort of tenseness that makes your heart sink. You hug him tightly, feeling his soft lips against your forehead before he’s burying his face into your hair. “Are you tired? Do you and the baby want to nap?” He whispers gently as he rubs the muscles on the back of your neck with his fingertips. 

“I’m okay. No tiredness, yet.” You whisper, relishing in the warmth he gives you. “It’s a girl.” He mutters before looking over at the two men in the entryway. 

“Hoseok is up in the playroom with Im Gyujin. We have to dispose of his body. Quietly.” Yoongi pulls out a cigarette before nodding. Namjoon takes off his hoodie before following Yoongi up the second staircase. You look up at your husband, chin to the middle of his chest. He was the most handsome man in the entire universe. Even now, after all these years your heart still swells at the sight of him. He looks down at you before kissing the tip of your nose. “I love you, Kitten.”

“I love you, too.” You whisper before hugging him tightly. He chuckles gently before exhaling a long breath. “We don’t think he got far enough to tell the Ims anything at all. Which is good. He was bleeding out on the side of the road from his mouth. Passed out from blood loss.” He mumbles to you before running his hand over your back. 

“Well that’s good at least.” You reply before small arms are wrapping around your leg. You hum questionably before looking down at Jisuk as he squeezes your leg. Jimin steps back before chuckling gently, “Aunt Y/N?” Jisuk whispers quietly.

You look over at Jin as he sits down on the couch, “What’s the matter, babe?” You ask before crouching down to his height and pushing some of his hair off of his forehead. 

“Mommy and Daddy are going to take me to the zoo!” Jisuk says happily and you giggle as he jumps up and down. “Are they?! That’s so much fun! You’re going to get to go see elephants! Your favorite!” He nods fervently before Jin sits up on the couch. “We’re going to take Hawon and Minseok if that���s okay. I know you guys have a lot going on right now and I don’t want the kids here when the playroom gets emptied… y’know?” Jin pipes up from the couch.

“That’s a great idea. Thanks Jin.” Jimin says gratefully before your phone begins to ring. Jimin raises an eyebrow before laughing. “Rina already is feeling the pressure?”

You dig into your leather jacket before widening your eyes. “No actually, it’s Im Ryu.” You whisper before showing your husband the phone. Jin stands up quickly before picking Jisuk up and nodding towards the kitchen. “I’ll give you both some privacy.”

The ringer is loud as you both stare at each other. Nervousness encroaching upon your mind before Jimin grabs your hand. He clears his throat awkwardly before nodding to the phone. “Answer it.”

You swipe your thumb over the call button before putting the phone on speaker, “Ryu! Hey!”

You hear a giggle before she speaks, “Vixen! Good afternoon! Did you eat yet?”

You squint your eyes at your husband before he’s shaking his head slowly. “No! I haven’t eaten yet. You?” He looks at his Rolex before pushing some hair behind your ear.

“Nope! You know what that means!” Her voice sounds carefree and as light as air. It’s almost relaxing before you’re holding up your phone to your mouth.

“Gaudio’s?” You ask before hearing a laugh. “My treat, Vixen. See you in an hour?”

Jimin nods slowly before closing his eyes. “An hour is perfect.” You reply before the line goes dead. He exhales through his nose before wrapping his hand around your wrist and pulling you up the stairs. 

“I want Yoongi and Namjoon to go with you. She might not know anything and she might know everything.” Jimin mutters as he riffles through his desk drawers. His eyes light up before pulling out a long thin wire with a small microphone attached to it. “You’re bugging me?” You ask your husband before folding your arms. He nods quickly before curling his hand to have you walk over to him.

“Jimin, no. You’re not fucking bugging me and making me wear this stup-” He silences you with a kiss before putting his forehead to yours. “You’re going to wear this so I can be with you. I need to hear if she knows anything or alludes to anything. Plus, you have my baby inside you and I need this for my peace of mind.” He shakes his hand, the thin wire shaking gently before stilling. Your eyes meet his, pupils flickering between both of his eyes as he stares at you with steely determination.

Now was certainly not the time to be a brat. “Okay.” You whisper before stepping back. You could be unreasonable at any given time, but today with the stakes raised so high, you would give in to your husband. Countless times before you’re denied him simple things to get a rise from him but you couldn’t bring yourself to today. 

“I want you to bring a gun with you just in case. And, your knife.” You nod to him as he pulls down the straps of your dress to attach the microphone. “Don’t trust anything she says. Analyze everything and don’t walk into a trap with your free speaking mouth.” He instructs you before kissing your lips.

You giggle before staring at the new picture above the desk, it used to be just the seven men and now it was them plus the new additions to your family. If this lunch could somehow bring to light if the Im’s knew you took one of their family members, you needed to go through with it.

You didn’t hate Ryu or Haeun, nor their children for what the Im brothers did to your parents. But, they would end up suffering without their husbands. It’s unfortunate that they had to be the ones to do such a thing, but you feel no remorse for your payback. You feel remorse that their families would suffer. This lunch can bring you one step closer to your revenge, whether Jimin tries to hold you back from it or not.

Stepping into the restaurant, you can already feel your palms begin to sweat. Having Yoongi and Namjoon with you was nice but feeling the knife on your thigh gives you a steadiness you need as your heels clack against the marble floor. “Park.” You say to the waiter before taking off your sunglasses. 

This part that you play so easily, the carefree Vixen of Seoul with a steeled brain and a venomous tongue usually dissipates around Ryu and Haeun. You had considered them friends for years before finding out their husbands had murdered your parents. Shortly after finding out this information, your free time that was spent with them was few and far between. You didn’t want to see their faces, didn’t want to feel unwarranted anger rise within you because of something their significant others had done and not them. 

Jimin had told you countless times not to look at them in such a way if you wanted to continue to be their friend. But, how could you not look at them with anger? You were unsure if they knew what their husbands had done or even if Junggoo and Jungin knew who they killed. Regardless, revenge was coming their way and there would be major fallout.

The private dining room doors swing open and you take in Ryu as she sips her wine. She was wearing the Oh Hyungshil necklace you had bought off a patron in the restaurant many years ago and you clear your throat before entering with Yoongi and Namjoon behind you. Ryu only had one Im man with her today. You’re unsure if she knows anything but without more men behind her, you feel yourself falling into a false sense of security which is something Jimin explicitly today you not to do.

She looks up at you, a large smile spreading on her face before looking at both of the guys behind you. “Are you in danger?!” She asks quickly, putting down her glass of wine. 

“I’m not sure.” You reply honestly before taking your seat across from her. She widens her eyes at you before watching as you place your hand over your flat stomach. She reaches over the table before grabbing the glass of champagne she ordered for you. “I’ll take that. Thank you preggo.” She mumbles before sipping the champagne.

This is usually so easy between the both of you, more so then when Haeun is around. Ryu was a genuinely nice person, she was funny and fierce quite like yourself and it tugs at your heartstrings that you’ve kept her so far away because of something her husband did. “Congratulations by the way, I know you were having a hard time trying to get pregnant." She congratulates you and you give her a small smile. 

“Thanks, we just found out yesterday.” Her smile widens before looking at the two members behind you. She points to the chairs beside you before nodding to the men. “Sit down, it’s not every day I get to see two Lions in one room.”

They both sit before looking at each other with a raised eyebrow. The Ims never ask for other men to sit down, they don’t want them to be completely comfortable and so you could imagine how off putting it might be for them. Your eyes find Ryus before she’s sitting back in her chair. “I asked you to come eat with me because I got this.” She whispers before digging into her purse and handing you a letter. 

You watch as she hands it to you, fingers shaking delicately before she runs her hands over the top of her tight bun. “Junggoo wanted to know if you’ve gotten anything like this.” She whispers over the table before chugging the champagne. 

You pull the note out delicately, the stock card rustling before the bold words in black are presented to you.

You widen your eyes at the note before passing it to Yoongi who sits beside you. “No sender, no nothing.” You mumble to him as Namjoon peers over his shoulder.

“You haven’t received anything like that?” Ryu asks, her tone filled with fright and nervousness. 

“No, we haven’t.” Yoongi mumbles before narrowing his eyes at the inked page. You peek down the front of your dress before feeling relaxed knowing Jimin was listening. This was odd, there was really nothing about the Im’s, apart from the knowledge that they murdered your parents, that they really have done wrong. They run illegal cock fighting, guns and own a casino quite like yours. They really aren’t in the business of doing things ridiculously out there. “This is handwritten.” Namjoon notifies you all before taking the letter from Yoongi’s hands with his sleeve. 

“If you don’t mind I’d actually like to get some tests run on this.” Namjoon asks Ryu before sliding it back into the envelope without touching it, “We should run some tests on it. For fingerprints and stuff.” He says to her.

She nods enthusiastically, “Please! Anything would help. I’m so nervous, Y/N. What if my kids get taken or something?!” She whimpers before putting her hand to her forehead. Now this was something any mother would take seriously. “No one is fucking taking your children. Do you hear me?” You grab her hand over the table before narrowing your eyes at her.

“As a mother, you would never allow anything to happen to them and I know you very well. Your children and both you and Haeun are going to be just fine.” You aren’t promising anything else, that would be a lie and you’re too bold to do anything but tell the truth. She nods, eyes becoming glassy before Namjoon puts the letter inside of his suit jacket. 

“Now let's eat.” You tell her as the waiters enter with food, before you can cross your legs you feel a piece of paper land on your knees and you shift before looking into Ryu’s eyes and grabbing it.

Jimin greets you at the door, arms open for you before enveloping you in a hug. “Kitten, you did phenomenal as always.” His tone was full of glee and you find yourself snorting as you hug him back. 

“Are the kids at the zoo with Jin?” You ask quietly, Jimin hums in agreement. You wrap your hand around his wrist before pulling him up the stairs. He raises an eyebrow before following you willingly. Your hand digs into your dress before pulling out the microphone and putting it into your husband's hand. 

Wordlessly you climb the sets of stairs, lips pressing into a tight line. “I didn’t read it. I waited to open it.” You notify your husband before finally ascending to the third floor. 

“Read what, baby?” He asks confused as you pull a letter out of your purse and handing it to him over your shoulder as you walk towards your bedroom. He groans gently as you open up the lion carved doors before slamming it shut behind him.

His fingers rip open the letter before pulling out the piece of stock card within it. He hugs you tightly, running his hand over your stomach before cursing quietly. 

“This can go one of two ways.” Jimin says before throwing the note onto the bed. His lips begin to dance over your shoulder. 

“They find out it was us who had him or they think the person who sent the letter has taken him.” You whisper to him. He replies with a nod before closing his eyes. “I’m praying for the latter.”

#the lions den #btscreatorscorner #btswritersclub #btswritingcafe #the bird cage bts fluff #bts angst #mafia!au #mafia!jimin #mafia!bts #mafia!jimin x reader #mafia!jimin x you

[sophielovesbarnes]

All or nothing, chapter three.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Winchester!reader

Warnings: Mention of death, fluff, drinking.

Author note: Took me a while to write this one, I had a horrible writer’s block, and yesterday I managed to break it.

I hope you enjoy the chapter, let me know if you want to be tagged.

Requests are open.

Gifs are not mine.

Masterlist

Chapter two

Chapter three.

Why the hell did you have to wait until the last minute to start cleaning? You mentally slap yourself and sigh before getting back to scrub the floor; you wanted to give Spencer a good image and for what you have learned so far, he is a neat person and likes very clean spaces, which is why you were in the middle of an intensive cleaning session. 

You aren’t much of a messy person, but you are also in college, so there is unfolded laundry on the couch, empty food containers on the kitchen, dirty dishes in the sink, and shoes on the floor, and you have had a hell of a week, after meeting Spencer on Tuesday, you spent all night on the moon, then on Wednesday you had to spend all the afternoon doing homework, so now you had a lot of work to do, including packing to go back home after school on Friday. 

“Come one Y/N, stop procrastinating and get to it.” 

Three hours later the kitchen and the living room are spotless, your laundry is folded and stacked on your closet, there is nothing on the floor, your suitcases are ready and the lasagna is in the oven, and there is freshly baked garlic bread on the table. 

You admire your work as you rub your wet hair with a towel, trying to absorb as much water possible so you can blow dry it, then you go back to your room so you can find something decent to wear in your closet, you end up choosing the blue summer dress Sam gave you for your birthday last year, you had been saving it for a special occasion and this was definitely one.

When you are ready you finish setting the table and at 6 o’clock on the dot your doorbell rings. 

***

Spencer has changed a total of seven times in a lapse of fifteen minutes, he can’t remember the last time he felt this nervous.

He likes you, he really does, and it shouldn’t be possible to like someone this much in such a short span of time, but you are the most gorgeous girl he has ever been with, and you are also funny, and kind, and smart, and as hard as it seems you both share so many interests in common. 

But at the same time you are like him you are also quite the opposite, you take him out and far away from his comfort zone, and it is both exciting and terrifying, but it makes his mind wander and worry, will he be enough for you? And if he is, if you manage to get into a relationship, how will you make it work? With him living 576 miles away from you, and you both having such different lifestyles. 

He also has Maeve on mind, he couldn’t keep her safe, and he has seen the families and loved ones of his time getting in the crossfire, he saw it with Hotch, when Hayley got killed by Foyet, and he is terrified by the idea of something happening to you because of him. 

He stops himself and tries to shake the shiver from his spine, he shouldn’t be worrying so much at this point, he brings himself back to the hotel room and stares at the mirror and finally decides what to wear, the blue sweater with the matching tie will do, he tries to tame his hair with his fingers and then he leaves his hotel room, he is lucky enough to have both Morgan and Rossi out so he won’t be asked to explain something he hasn’t finished understanding. 

The address you gave him is quite close to the hotel he is staying in so he decides to walk, the city is nice and he can see why do you like it so much, sooner than he expected it he finds himself in front of the apartment complex that you indicated, he builds himself with courage and he rings the bell, the gate opens and he enters and calls the elevator on the fourth floor he gets down and knocks on your door.

When you open he is astonished, you look incredibly beautiful, you are wearing your hair down and curled, and the blue dress you are wearing hugs your body perfectly, and just like that he confirms one more time how much he likes you.

“Spencer! Hi, come on in.” He enters, closing the door behind him and you give him a smile.

“I-I got you these.” He gives you the bouquet of gerberas he bought in the way and he sees your eyes sparkle as you receive them.

“They are so pretty! Thank you.” You head to the sink, fill a vase with water and then you place the flowers on the kitchen bar. “Please take a seat, can I get you anything to drink?” 

“Water is fine.” He answers admiring your house, it’s small and cozy and all the pictures on the walls make it feel like a home. “It’s a nice place.” 

“Thank you, I owe it to Dean, like pretty much everything in my life.” The timer rings, giving you the cue to turn off the oven and take out the lasagna, you put on your gloves and take it, and then put it on the heat proof mat you had placed on the table. “I hope you are hungry.”  

“Starving.” He replies with a soft smile. 

You cut the lasagna and serve it on both of your plates, Spencer gives you a soft smile thanking you, you sit in front of him and raise your glass.

“To us.” He imitates your action and clinks his wine glass with yours. “Cheers.”

“Did you know that “Cheers” originated from the old French word chiere which meant “face” or “head.” By the 18th century, it meant “gladness,” and was used as a way of expressing encouragement.” He rambles. “And toasting is thought to come from sacrificial libations in which a sacred liquid was offered to the gods in exchange for a wish, or a prayer for health. It was Greek and Roman tradition to leave an offering to the gods, including alcoholic beverages, during celebrations and commonly after a death. In Greek mythology, the god of wine, Bacchus, was often toasted.”

“I did, and did you know that in Medieval times, glasses were clinked and people cheered loudly to ward off any demons or evil spirits? And that there are theories that say that it was done to avoid poisoning?” You reply, and he is fascinated to be able to talk with someone that is actually interested on this kind of facts and willing to talk about them with him. 

You take a sip of your wine and smile at him, and he could swear his heart jumps every time you do it.

“Bon appetit.” 

He takes the first bite and then looks at you with his eyes wide open.

“This is really good.”

“Thanks, it’s my mom’s recipe. She used to have a restaurant and people would make lines to try her food.”

“Are those your parents?” He asks pointing to the picture of your parent’s wedding, it was your favorite photograph of them, your mom looks beautiful in her white dress and she seems so happy and your dad is looking at her, and you can see the love in their eyes. 

“Yeah.” You reply, nostalgia running through your veins. 

“It’s a nice picture, do they live in Kansas as well?”

“No.” You take a deep breath and then continue. “They are gone.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, it has been a long time.” You sigh and try to keep your emotions on the line. “They died in a car crash when I was eleven.”

“That’s why I owe Dean so much, when the accident happened Adam was already in college, but I was still little, and my aunt Sabine tried to take me back to Minnesota, but Dean wouldn’t have it, he filled to be my legal guardian and he went to trial against my aunt and he won, then he sold his bachelor’s apartment and bought a house for the both of us and he became both my mom and my dad.”

“He sounds like a great brother.”

“He is, I’m lucky to have him, and Sam and Adam, they are quite amazing.” You take the picture from your first competition and show it to him. “These are my brothers, Dean is carrying me, Sam is on the left and Adam is on the right.”

“You look really happy.”  He comments.

“Yeah, I was, it was probably one of the best days of my life.” You reply, filled with joy of reliving the memory, the moment when your team was announced champion, the proud looks on your brothers’ eyes, the screams of excitement coming from your teammates, and the intense feeling of joy running through your veins. “It was my first all star competition, man, you should've seen Dean, he bragged about it for months.”

“For how long have you been a cheerleader?”

“I started with ballet and gymnastics when I was 3 and I joined the squad at my elementary school as soon as I got in.”

“What do you like about it?”

“Well, I love dancing and I love sharing joy, cheerleading lets me do both.”

“Are you planning to do it professionally?” He asks.

“I don’t think so, to be honest I think I would rather develop my career as a psychologist, I would also like to have a dance academy, but I think that would be an extra.” You take a small pause to admire the soft color of his eyes and then ask. “What about you? Did you always know that you wanted to be an FBI agent?”

“Not really, I knew that I wanted to help people but I wasn’t sure how, then when I was 22 I decided to join the FBI.” 

“Have you ever considered doing anything else?”

“A part of me would like to teach, but I don’t think I do good in front of many people.” 

“Well being honest, I loved hearing you.” You see his cheeks blush and he looks away for a moment.

“Thank you.”

You finish eating while doing small talk, you ask him about his career, his team, you see how enthusiastic he gets when he talks about them, when he tells you how they became his family.

He also tells you about his mom, about how she slowly deteriorated and how much it scares him to get sick like her. When he is speaking you place your hand on top of his, he gives you a small smile and then changes the subject. 

“Tell me about your brothers.”

“Well, Dean’s the oldest, and he has always taken care of all of us, he is the most loving person I know. He taught me how to ride a bike and helped me to do my homework every day until highschool. 

He is a mechanic, he has his own workshop where he does restorations on vintage cars, he was also a soldier, he enlisted after 9/11, that’s where he met Castiel, he was an army doctor, he crushed on him but he was already married to Lisa, and she was expecting Ben, my nephew, then he came back home but he and Lisa didn’t work together as a couple anymore, they tried to stay together for Ben, but they weren’t happy, so they got divorced and stayed as friends, then like fifteen years later Dean got in a small car accident and the doctor that got his case was Castiel, they started dating very little after that, and they got married three years ago, this year they adopted a little boy, Leo, he is the love of their lives.” 

While you are talking Spencer looks at you with attention, and your hand never leaves his. 

“Sam’s the smart one, he studied law at Stanford and he is now a junior partner on one of the biggest firms on Kansas, he is married with Jess, they have two daughters, Marie and Elizabeth, and Adam studied Mechanical Engineering at KU, he works on the workshop with Dean, and he is expecting a baby with Jo, who is basically my sister, they used to hate each other they were always jumping at the other’s neck, so it was definitely a surprise.”

“Do you miss living in Kansas?”

“Yeah, I do, sometimes I get very lonely here, I have friends and all but, it’s not the same as having my family here, that’s why I love vacations so much, because I can go back home and see them.”

“Yeah, I get the feeling.”

Talking to him is easy, when you are with him you don’t feel the need to keep your guard up, you feel like you can trust him with anything, when you talk he listens with attention, he actually listens, not like other boys you have met, that only wait for you to stop talking so they can focus the conversation on them, and when he talks you are fascinated, he is insanely smart and well educated, you have the most interesting conversation you have had in your entire life , and time seems to fade away, when you notice it, it’s already past midnight.

He helps you to clean, after you finish you walk him to the door, you are standing under the threshold when you both start to speak at the same time, you chuckle softly and then let him start.

“Thank you for having me.”

“It was my pleasure.”

Then you stay in silence, and you allow yourself to get lost in his eyes, slowly you get closer to him, so close you can feel his soft breath over your mouth, he hesitates for a minute but then he places his hand on your waist and then you close the distance between your lips and his. 

Kissing you has to be the most exhilarating feeling he has ever had, it is like his lips were meant to be in yours, you run your fingers through his hair and then he pulls you closer to him, making your chest rest on his, your lips move softly and in synchrony his his. 

He wonders if you can feel his heart beating, because it seems like it may abandon his chest at any moment.

Every shadow of doubt fades away, at that very moment he makes the decision that he is not willing to let you slip away from him, he will fight to keep you next to him, he will do whatever it takes.

“Good night Doctor Reid.”

Tags: @that-aesthetic-wannabe

#spencer reid x winchester!reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid #spencer reid smut #reid x you #reid x reader #winchester!reader #winchester!sister #supernatural x you #supernatural x reader #supernatural

[too-much-sunshine]

Fangs for the Hospitality

Chapter 1

Summary: After Remus goes a bit too far during a family reunion bet, Roman finds himself alone and near freezing outside in an early winter storm. His car broke down, and he's in the middle of nowhere with no phone. He cant seem to catch a break. Deciding his life cant much worse, Roman decides to head into the woods looking for help. His luck may be turning when the man who opens the door is a lot more charming than he should be. His kids are fascinated by the new face appearing from the woods. And man this guy has some sharp teeth... Maybe Roman bit off a bit more than he can chew with this one.

A/N: My self-indulgent magic/vampire fic! Let me know if I need to tag something or you wanna be tagged!

Pairings: Familial DAM, Creavtivitwins, Eventual Roceit, Eventual Intrulogical

Warnings: (Done per chapter) Car trouble, mention of bets, gossip, mentions of bad family relations

Word Count: 1466

Read on AO3!

“God Dammit! No no nonono please! Don’t do this to me!” Roman whined at his car from behind the wheel from the driver's seat.

Despite his pleading, the car continued to sputter even louder than previously. Finally starting to slow down, leaving Roman no choice other than to pull his car off to the side of the road.

He continued to lament his plight to no one except the empty seat beside him, leaning over to place his forehead on the steering wheel.  At this point he couldn't even try to stop the tears rolling down his cheeks landing on his lap.

There was no one else on the empty, countryside road making it easy to do so.

“Why does this always happen to me!?” He whined as he turned the key finally giving the engine a much needed break. “I can’t do this anymore! The world hates meee!”

Earlier that day the passenger seat was filled by his overly excitable twin brother, Remus, on their way to the yearly family reunion. Roman has always hated these reunions with a burning passion. He only went because he was expected to at this point.

There was always too much expectation from everyone at the reunions. Since his family was quite well off they were the one to host every year. Inviting everyone to their too grand, too big victorian style home.

Remus, on the other hand, had always liked the family reunions. He too was asked those questions (well not the one about his career, they were all quite proud of him becoming a doctor. Specifically an obstetrician and gynecologist. Remus said it was because delivering babies was gross and dealing with people who have female reproductive systems health could be horrifying, but he can never deny how much he liked helping the people he did. He has a counter on his fridge of how many babies he has brought into the world and sometimes he even looks at it and smiles, not that Remus knew that Roman saw him do that.) but Remus let the other questions roll straight off his back in a way Roman never could.

He was holding on hope that this year, like every year, would be different. Maybe his mother would stop asking if he had chosen a more suitable career path like Remus. Maybe his grandmother would stop asking if he found a pretty girl yet. Maybe his grandfather would be anything more than dismissive toward him.   Maybe...maybe his dad might show up to this one.

Not to mention that they also just made him wildly uncomfortable. Too many people really. All those people being fake and backhanded. He alway felt like they were looking specifically at him as he walked by. Just a bad time for him all around.

Remus really liked the reunions because of the gossip and chaos of it all. Every year as soon as they arrived he would immediately go and find their cousin Remy to lay down the new hot tea about the family. Then after all that was settled they would place bets on who could get the most outrageous rumor started. Remy would typically win because of his talent for making such believable lies. Remus always went too far off the deep end and the family didn't usually believe what they were being told. Which was completely fair because “what do you mean Jill isn't here because she suddenly decided to take a trip to West Virginia to look for Mothman? Remus Jill is 89 years old. And who is Mothman?”

That stupid rumor game is what started this whole mess anyway. Roman always tried to stay out of it. He wasn't very good at the game, though he was a good actor he was very bad at lying. So for the past few years he'd skip out on playing. He'd just go to his corner, and wait for the night to be over.

This year Remus and Remy decided to up the ante as it were. There was going to be a whole $50 bill on the line this time (though that was trump change compared to how much money his family actually made). Remus is never one to back down from a challenge and though he's a doctor, he doesn't tend to think ahead of his actions all that well. Especially when he got a bit too excited. That being said, he really messed things up for Roman this time.

That stupid game had made everyones eyes turn to him for an explanation that he didn’t have. Forced him to run from the house and flee in his car without Remus behind him.

Roman didn't take time to dwell on the fact he was his brother's ride.

With his head still on the steering wheel he closed his eyes and let out a heavy sigh. He didn't know how he was going to get out of this one, so he continued to sit a wallow a bit. Maybe he’ll just wait a bit and his car will start back up…

~~~

Roman pulled the car into the last spot left open in the large parking lot outside of their parents mansion.

He pulled in between what looked to be his Aunt Clara and Uncle Jim's red corvette, and his Grandmother dark blue rolls-royce. He took extra care parking in between the two very expensive cars. Making sure to leave plenty of room around them and his own, significantly crappier car. He knew from experience that if he didn't leave the room he would be getting an earful later from said family members.

As he turned the key he let out a nervous breath looking over to Remus who was almost bouncing in his seat.

“You ready?” Roman asked with a slight smile. As much as he was worried to be here, he was glad his brother would have a good time.

“I can’t wait! I can’t wait to beat Remy's ass this year! I have such a good rumor that the whole family is going to believe for years to come. That 50 dollars is mine!” Remus smiled bright and pumped his fist in the air.

Roman couldn’t help but feel excited for him. Remus even seemed more excited now, if the bouncing and fidgeting said anything.

“I’m sure you’ll get it out of him one way or another. Come on, let's go.” Roman started for his car door when Remus’ arm shot out and stopped him. Roman looked back to Remus to see he had stopped bouncing, seeming somewhat sobered. Looking more serious, and to be contemplating something tilting his head back and forth. Then he finally spoke.

“Listen...I know this isn't your kind of thing since dad left... But I’m with you okay? Stick with me if you need to. Those old assholes don't know what they're talking about with you, okay?” Remus looked slightly shy as he spoke, not looking directly at Roman.

Still, Roman smiled softly at his twin, both a bit confused and touched. Remus didn't typically try and make Roman feel better; he wasn't very good with words. But he did appreciate the sentiment.

“Thank you Remus. I’ll try to enjoy myself. Might even try to leave my corner if I feel so inclined.” Roman smiled. “Maybe dable in a little bit conversion. Just try to keep your hijinks somewhat clean and manageable.”

“Well that's no fun!” And Remus was back to his normal self, seeming grateful for the topic change. “My only reason to be here is to cause chaos and you know it! Now let's go! There is supposed to be a really big storm coming and if we're lucky the snow will distract everyone from when I plan to steal the bust of great Aunt Kathy!” Remus cackled as he exited the car, way more excited then he should be for a man who admitted to planning theft.

Roman took the moment alone to take a stealing breath. He looked out the window at the huge family house where he grew up. It was much too big, too grand for children to grow up in. It didn't feel like home anymore. Looking back it never really did to Roman.

He hated coming here and he hated the feelings associated here. But if it makes Remus happy to come here together, and it keeps the rest of his family off his back, he’ll keep trying. A knock on the window made him jump out of his thoughts.

“You fucking ready!? I’m freezing my tits off out here ya know!” Remus shouted too loud for how close he was to the window.

“As I’ll ever be…” he muttered to himself, smiling a bit at Remus being Remus as he unbuckled his seatbelt and left the car.

~~~

Next Chapter

Taglist:

@primaveradoodles

#sanders sides #ts roman sanders #ts roman #ts remus sanders #ts remus #car trouble #mentions of bets #gossip #bad family relations #eventual roceit #roceit #eventual intrulogical #intrulogical #magic au #vampire au #sanders sides fanfiction #verys fic

[galaxierowls]

The Great Gatsby

by

F. Scott Fitzgerald

Then wear the gold hat, if that will move her;

If you can bounce high, bounce for her too,

Till she cry "Lover, gold-hatted, high-bouncing lover,

I must have you!"

—THOMAS PARKE D'INVILLIERS

Chapter 1

In my younger and more vulnerable years my father gave me some advice that I've been turning over in my mind ever since.

"Whenever you feel like criticizing any one," he told me, "just remember that all the people in this world haven't had the advantages that you've had."

He didn't say any more but we've always been unusually communicative in a reserved way, and I understood that he meant a great deal more than that. In consequence I'm inclined to reserve all judgments, a habit that has opened up many curious natures to me and also made me the victim of not a few veteran bores. The abnormal mind is quick to detect and attach itself to this quality when it appears in a normal person, and so it came about that in college I was unjustly accused of being a politician, because I was privy to the secret griefs of wild, unknown men. Most of the confidences were unsought—frequently I have feigned sleep, preoccupation, or a hostile levity when I realized by some unmistakable sign that an intimate revelation was quivering on the horizon—for the intimate revelations of young men or at least the terms in which they express them are usually plagiaristic and marred by obvious suppressions. Reserving judgments is a matter of infinite hope. I am still a little afraid of missing something if I forget that, as my father snobbishly suggested, and I snobbishly repeat, a sense of the fundamental decencies is parcelled out unequally at birth.

And, after boasting this way of my tolerance, I come to the admission that it has a limit. Conduct may be founded on the hard rock or the wet marshes but after a certain point I don't care what it's founded on. When I came back from the East last autumn I felt that I wanted the world to be in uniform and at a sort of moral attention forever; I wanted no more riotous excursions with privileged glimpses into the human heart. Only Gatsby, the man who gives his name to this book, was exempt from my reaction—Gatsby who represented everything for which I have an unaffected scorn. If personality is an unbroken series of successful gestures, then there was something gorgeous about him, some heightened sensitivity to the promises of life, as if he were related to one of those intricate machines that register earthquakes ten thousand miles away. This responsiveness had nothing to do with that flabby impressionability which is dignified under the name of the "creative temperament"—it was an extraordinary gift for hope, a romantic readiness such as I have never found in any other person and which it is not likely I shall ever find again. No—Gatsby turned out all right at the end; it is what preyed on Gatsby, what foul dust floated in the wake of his dreams that temporarily closed out my interest in the abortive sorrows and short-winded elations of men.

My family have been prominent, well-to-do people in this middle-western city for three generations. The Carraways are something of a clan and we have a tradition that we're descended from the Dukes of Buccleuch, but the actual founder of my line was my grandfather's brother who came here in fifty-one, sent a substitute to the Civil War and started the wholesale hardware business that my father carries on today.

I never saw this great-uncle but I'm supposed to look like him—with special reference to the rather hard-boiled painting that hangs in Father's office. I graduated from New Haven in 1915, just a quarter of a century after my father, and a little later I participated in that delayed Teutonic migration known as the Great War. I enjoyed the counter-raid so thoroughly that I came back restless. Instead of being the warm center of the world the middle-west now seemed like the ragged edge of the universe—so I decided to go east and learn the bond business. Everybody I knew was in the bond business so I supposed it could support one more single man. All my aunts and uncles talked it over as if they were choosing a prep-school for me and finally said, "Why—ye-es" with very grave, hesitant faces. Father agreed to finance me for a year and after various delays I came east, permanently, I thought, in the spring of twenty-two.

The practical thing was to find rooms in the city but it was a warm season and I had just left a country of wide lawns and friendly trees, so when a young man at the office suggested that we take a house together in a commuting town it sounded like a great idea. He found the house, a weather beaten cardboard bungalow at eighty a month, but at the last minute the firm ordered him to Washington and I went out to the country alone. I had a dog, at least I had him for a few days until he ran away, and an old Dodge and a Finnish woman who made my bed and cooked breakfast and muttered Finnish wisdom to herself over the electric stove.

It was lonely for a day or so until one morning some man, more recently arrived than I, stopped me on the road.

"How do you get to West Egg village?" he asked helplessly.

I told him. And as I walked on I was lonely no longer. I was a guide, a pathfinder, an original settler. He had casually conferred on me the freedom of the neighborhood.

And so with the sunshine and the great bursts of leaves growing on the trees—just as things grow in fast movies—I had that familiar conviction that life was beginning over again with the summer.

There was so much to read for one thing and so much fine health to be pulled down out of the young breath-giving air. I bought a dozen volumes on banking and credit and investment securities and they stood on my shelf in red and gold like new money from the mint, promising to unfold the shining secrets that only Midas and Morgan and Maecenas knew. And I had the high intention of reading many other books besides. I was rather literary in college—one year I wrote a series of very solemn and obvious editorials for the "Yale News"—and now I was going to bring back all such things into my life and become again that most limited of all specialists, the "well-rounded man." This isn't just an epigram—life is much more successfully looked at from a single window, after all.

It was a matter of chance that I should have rented a house in one of the strangest communities in North America. It was on that slender riotous island which extends itself due east of New York and where there are, among other natural curiosities, two unusual formations of land. Twenty miles from the city a pair of enormous eggs, identical in contour and separated only by a courtesy bay, jut out into the most domesticated body of salt water in the Western Hemisphere, the great wet barnyard of Long Island Sound. They are not perfect ovals—like the egg in the Columbus story they are both crushed flat at the contact end—but their physical resemblance must be a source of perpetual confusion to the gulls that fly overhead. To the wingless a more arresting phenomenon is their dissimilarity in every particular except shape and size.

I lived at West Egg, the—well, the less fashionable of the two, though this is a most superficial tag to express the bizarre and not a little sinister contrast between them. My house was at the very tip of the egg, only fifty yards from the Sound, and squeezed between two huge places that rented for twelve or fifteen thousand a season. The one on my right was a colossal affair by any standard—it was a factual imitation of some Hôtel de Ville in Normandy, with a tower on one side, spanking new under a thin beard of raw ivy, and a marble swimming pool and more than forty acres of lawn and garden. It was Gatsby's mansion. Or rather, as I didn't know Mr. Gatsby it was a mansion inhabited by a gentleman of that name. My own house was an eye-sore, but it was a small eye-sore, and it had been overlooked, so I had a view of the water, a partial view of my neighbor's lawn, and the consoling proximity of millionaires—all for eighty dollars a month.

Across the courtesy bay the white palaces of fashionable East Egg glittered along the water, and the history of the summer really begins on the evening I drove over there to have dinner with the Tom Buchanans. Daisy was my second cousin once removed and I'd known Tom in college. And just after the war I spent two days with them in Chicago.

Her husband, among various physical accomplishments, had been one of the most powerful ends that ever played football at New Haven—a national figure in a way, one of those men who reach such an acute limited excellence at twenty-one that everything afterward savors of anti-climax. His family were enormously wealthy—even in college his freedom with money was a matter for reproach—but now he'd left Chicago and come east in a fashion that rather took your breath away: for instance he'd brought down a string of polo ponies from Lake Forest. It was hard to realize that a man in my own generation was wealthy enough to do that.

Why they came east I don't know. They had spent a year in France, for no particular reason, and then drifted here and there unrestfully wherever people played polo and were rich together. This was a permanent move, said Daisy over the telephone, but I didn't believe it—I had no sight into Daisy's heart but I felt that Tom would drift on forever seeking a little wistfully for the dramatic turbulence of some irrecoverable football game.

And so it happened that on a warm windy evening I drove over to East Egg to see two old friends whom I scarcely knew at all. Their house was even more elaborate than I expected, a cheerful red and white Georgian Colonial mansion overlooking the bay. The lawn started at the beach and ran toward the front door for a quarter of a mile, jumping over sun-dials and brick walks and burning gardens—finally when it reached the house drifting up the side in bright vines as though from the momentum of its run. The front was broken by a line of French windows, glowing now with reflected gold, and wide open to the warm windy afternoon, and Tom Buchanan in riding clothes was standing with his legs apart on the front porch.

He had changed since his New Haven years. Now he was a sturdy, straw haired man of thirty with a rather hard mouth and a supercilious manner. Two shining, arrogant eyes had established dominance over his face and gave him the appearance of always leaning aggressively forward. Not even the effeminate swank of his riding clothes could hide the enormous power of that body—he seemed to fill those glistening boots until he strained the top lacing and you could see a great pack of muscle shifting when his shoulder moved under his thin coat. It was a body capable of enormous leverage—a cruel body.

His speaking voice, a gruff husky tenor, added to the impression of fractiousness he conveyed. There was a touch of paternal contempt in it, even toward people he liked—and there were men at New Haven who had hated his guts.

"Now, don't think my opinion on these matters is final," he seemed to say, "just because I'm stronger and more of a man than you are." We were in the same Senior Society, and while we were never intimate I always had the impression that he approved of me and wanted me to like him with some harsh, defiant wistfulness of his own.

We talked for a few minutes on the sunny porch.

"I've got a nice place here," he said, his eyes flashing about restlessly.

Turning me around by one arm he moved a broad flat hand along the front vista, including in its sweep a sunken Italian garden, a half acre of deep pungent roses and a snub-nosed motor boat that bumped the tide off shore.

"It belonged to Demaine the oil man." He turned me around again, politely and abruptly. "We'll go inside."

We walked through a high hallway into a bright rosy-colored space, fragilely bound into the house by French windows at either end. The windows were ajar and gleaming white against the fresh grass outside that seemed to grow a little way into the house. A breeze blew through the room, blew curtains in at one end and out the other like pale flags, twisting them up toward the frosted wedding cake of the ceiling—and then rippled over the wine-colored rug, making a shadow on it as wind does on the sea.

The only completely stationary object in the room was an enormous couch on which two young women were buoyed up as though upon an anchored balloon. They were both in white and their dresses were rippling and fluttering as if they had just been blown back in after a short flight around the house. I must have stood for a few moments listening to the whip and snap of the curtains and the groan of a picture on the wall. Then there was a boom as Tom Buchanan shut the rear windows and the caught wind died out about the room and the curtains and the rugs and the two young women ballooned slowly to the floor.

The younger of the two was a stranger to me. She was extended full length at her end of the divan, completely motionless and with her chin raised a little as if she were balancing something on it which was quite likely to fall. If she saw me out of the corner of her eyes she gave no hint of it—indeed, I was almost surprised into murmuring an apology for having disturbed her by coming in.

The other girl, Daisy, made an attempt to rise—she leaned slightly forward with a conscientious expression—then she laughed, an absurd, charming little laugh, and I laughed too and came forward into the room.

"I'm p-paralyzed with happiness."

She laughed again, as if she said something very witty, and held my hand for a moment, looking up into my face, promising that there was no one in the world she so much wanted to see. That was a way she had. She hinted in a murmur that the surname of the balancing girl was Baker. (I've heard it said that Daisy's murmur was only to make people lean toward her; an irrelevant criticism that made it no less charming.)

At any rate Miss Baker's lips fluttered, she nodded at me almost imperceptibly and then quickly tipped her head back again—the object she was balancing had obviously tottered a little and given her something of a fright. Again a sort of apology arose to my lips. Almost any exhibition of complete self sufficiency draws a stunned tribute from me.

I looked back at my cousin who began to ask me questions in her low, thrilling voice. It was the kind of voice that the ear follows up and down as if each speech is an arrangement of notes that will never be played again. Her face was sad and lovely with bright things in it, bright eyes and a bright passionate mouth—but there was an excitement in her voice that men who had cared for her found difficult to forget: a singing compulsion, a whispered "Listen," a promise that she had done gay, exciting things just a while since and that there were gay, exciting things hovering in the next hour.

I told her how I had stopped off in Chicago for a day on my way east and how a dozen people had sent their love through me.

"Do they miss me?" she cried ecstatically.

"The whole town is desolate. All the cars have the left rear wheel painted black as a mourning wreath and there's a persistent wail all night along the North Shore."

"How gorgeous! Let's go back, Tom. Tomorrow!" Then she added irrelevantly, "You ought to see the baby."

"I'd like to."

"She's asleep. She's two years old. Haven't you ever seen her?"

"Never."

"Well, you ought to see her. She's—"

Tom Buchanan who had been hovering restlessly about the room stopped and rested his hand on my shoulder.

"What you doing, Nick?"

"I'm a bond man."

"Who with?"

I told him.

"Never heard of them," he remarked decisively.

This annoyed me.

"You will," I answered shortly. "You will if you stay in the East."

"Oh, I'll stay in the East, don't you worry," he said, glancing at Daisy and then back at me, as if he were alert for something more. "I'd be a God Damned fool to live anywhere else."

At this point Miss Baker said "Absolutely!" with such suddenness that I started—it was the first word she uttered since I came into the room. Evidently it surprised her as much as it did me, for she yawned and with a series of rapid, deft movements stood up into the room.

"I'm stiff," she complained, "I've been lying on that sofa for as long as I can remember."

"Don't look at me," Daisy retorted. "I've been trying to get you to New York all afternoon."

"No, thanks," said Miss Baker to the four cocktails just in from the pantry, "I'm absolutely in training."

Her host looked at her incredulously.

"You are!" He took down his drink as if it were a drop in the bottom of a glass. "How you ever get anything done is beyond me."

I looked at Miss Baker wondering what it was she "got done." I enjoyed looking at her. She was a slender, small-breasted girl, with an erect carriage which she accentuated by throwing her body backward at the shoulders like a young cadet. Her grey sun-strained eyes looked back at me with polite reciprocal curiosity out of a wan, charming discontented face. It occurred to me now that I had seen her, or a picture of her, somewhere before.

"You live in West Egg," she remarked contemptuously. "I know somebody there."

"I don't know a single—"

"You must know Gatsby."

"Gatsby?" demanded Daisy. "What Gatsby?"

Before I could reply that he was my neighbor dinner was announced; wedging his tense arm imperatively under mine Tom Buchanan compelled me from the room as though he were moving a checker to another square.

Slenderly, languidly, their hands set lightly on their hips the two young women preceded us out onto a rosy-colored porch open toward the sunset where four candles flickered on the table in the diminished wind.

"Why candles?" objected Daisy, frowning. She snapped them out with her fingers. "In two weeks it'll be the longest day in the year." She looked at us all radiantly. "Do you always watch for the longest day of the year and then miss it? I always watch for the longest day in the year and then miss it."

"We ought to plan something," yawned Miss Baker, sitting down at the table as if she were getting into bed.

"All right," said Daisy. "What'll we plan?" She turned to me helplessly. "What do people plan?"

Before I could answer her eyes fastened with an awed expression on her little finger.

"Look!" she complained. "I hurt it."

We all looked—the knuckle was black and blue.

"You did it, Tom," she said accusingly. "I know you didn't mean to but you did do it. That's what I get for marrying a brute of a man, a great big hulking physical specimen of a—"

"I hate that word hulking," objected Tom crossly, "even in kidding."

"Hulking," insisted Daisy.

Sometimes she and Miss Baker talked at once, unobtrusively and with a bantering inconsequence that was never quite chatter, that was as cool as their white dresses and their impersonal eyes in the absence of all desire. They were here—and they accepted Tom and me, making only a polite pleasant effort to entertain or to be entertained. They knew that presently dinner would be over and a little later the evening too would be over and casually put away. It was sharply different from the West where an evening was hurried from phase to phase toward its close in a continually disappointed anticipation or else in sheer nervous dread of the moment itself.

"You make me feel uncivilized, Daisy," I confessed on my second glass of corky but rather impressive claret. "Can't you talk about crops or something?"

I meant nothing in particular by this remark but it was taken up in an unexpected way.

"Civilization's going to pieces," broke out Tom violently. "I've gotten to be a terrible pessimist about things. Have you read 'The Rise of the Coloured Empires' by this man Goddard?"

"Why, no," I answered, rather surprised by his tone.

"Well, it's a fine book, and everybody ought to read it. The idea is if we don't look out the white race will be—will be utterly submerged. It's all scientific stuff; it's been proved."

"Tom's getting very profound," said Daisy with an expression of unthoughtful sadness. "He reads deep books with long words in them. What was that word we—"

"Well, these books are all scientific," insisted Tom, glancing at her impatiently. "This fellow has worked out the whole thing. It's up to us who are the dominant race to watch out or these other races will have control of things."

"We've got to beat them down," whispered Daisy, winking ferociously toward the fervent sun.

"You ought to live in California—" began Miss Baker but Tom interrupted her by shifting heavily in his chair.

"This idea is that we're Nordics. I am, and you are and you are and—" After an infinitesimal hesitation he included Daisy with a slight nod and she winked at me again. "—and we've produced all the things that go to make civilization—oh, science and art and all that. Do you see?"

There was something pathetic in his concentration as if his complacency, more acute than of old, was not enough to him any more. When, almost immediately, the telephone rang inside and the butler left the porch Daisy seized upon the momentary interruption and leaned toward me.

"I'll tell you a family secret," she whispered enthusiastically. "It's about the butler's nose. Do you want to hear about the butler's nose?"

"That's why I came over tonight."

"Well, he wasn't always a butler; he used to be the silver polisher for some people in New York that had a silver service for two hundred people. He had to polish it from morning till night until finally it began to affect his nose—"

"Things went from bad to worse," suggested Miss Baker.

"Yes. Things went from bad to worse until finally he had to give up his position."

For a moment the last sunshine fell with romantic affection upon her glowing face; her voice compelled me forward breathlessly as I listened—then the glow faded, each light deserting her with lingering regret like children leaving a pleasant street at dusk.

The butler came back and murmured something close to Tom's ear whereupon Tom frowned, pushed back his chair and without a word went inside. As if his absence quickened something within her Daisy leaned forward again, her voice glowing and singing.

"I love to see you at my table, Nick. You remind me of a—of a rose, an absolute rose. Doesn't he?" She turned to Miss Baker for confirmation. "An absolute rose?"

This was untrue. I am not even faintly like a rose. She was only extemporizing but a stirring warmth flowed from her as if her heart was trying to come out to you concealed in one of those breathless, thrilling words. Then suddenly she threw her napkin on the table and excused herself and went into the house.

Miss Baker and I exchanged a short glance consciously devoid of meaning. I was about to speak when she sat up alertly and said "Sh!" in a warning voice. A subdued impassioned murmur was audible in the room beyond and Miss Baker leaned forward, unashamed, trying to hear. The murmur trembled on the verge of coherence, sank down, mounted excitedly, and then ceased altogether.

"This Mr. Gatsby you spoke of is my neighbor—" I said.

"Don't talk. I want to hear what happens."

"Is something happening?" I inquired innocently.

"You mean to say you don't know?" said Miss Baker, honestly surprised. "I thought everybody knew."

"I don't."

"Why—" she said hesitantly, "Tom's got some woman in New York."

"Got some woman?" I repeated blankly.

Miss Baker nodded.

"She might have the decency not to telephone him at dinner-time. Don't you think?"

Almost before I had grasped her meaning there was the flutter of a dress and the crunch of leather boots and Tom and Daisy were back at the table.

"It couldn't be helped!" cried Daisy with tense gayety.

She sat down, glanced searchingly at Miss Baker and then at me and continued: "I looked outdoors for a minute and it's very romantic outdoors. There's a bird on the lawn that I think must be a nightingale come over on the Cunard or White Star Line. He's singing away—" her voice sang "—It's romantic, isn't it, Tom?"

"Very romantic," he said, and then miserably to me: "If it's light enough after dinner I want to take you down to the stables."

The telephone rang inside, startlingly, and as Daisy shook her head decisively at Tom the subject of the stables, in fact all subjects, vanished into air. Among the broken fragments of the last five minutes at table I remember the candles being lit again, pointlessly, and I was conscious of wanting to look squarely at every one and yet to avoid all eyes. I couldn't guess what Daisy and Tom were thinking but I doubt if even Miss Baker who seemed to have mastered a certain hardy skepticism was able utterly to put this fifth guest's shrill metallic urgency out of mind. To a certain temperament the situation might have seemed intriguing—my own instinct was to telephone immediately for the police.

The horses, needless to say, were not mentioned again. Tom and Miss Baker, with several feet of twilight between them strolled back into the library, as if to a vigil beside a perfectly tangible body, while trying to look pleasantly interested and a little deaf I followed Daisy around a chain of connecting verandas to the porch in front. In its deep gloom we sat down side by side on a wicker settee.

Daisy took her face in her hands, as if feeling its lovely shape, and her eyes moved gradually out into the velvet dusk. I saw that turbulent emotions possessed her, so I asked what I thought would be some sedative questions about her little girl.

"We don't know each other very well, Nick," she said suddenly. "Even if we are cousins. You didn't come to my wedding."

"I wasn't back from the war."

"That's true." She hesitated. "Well, I've had a very bad time, Nick, and I'm pretty cynical about everything."

Evidently she had reason to be. I waited but she didn't say any more, and after a moment I returned rather feebly to the subject of her daughter.

"I suppose she talks, and—eats, and everything."

"Oh, yes." She looked at me absently. "Listen, Nick; let me tell you what I said when she was born. Would you like to hear?"

"Very much."

Thank you.

#she speaks #ria ur so funny

[trek-tracks]

Trek Book Club: The Romulan Way

So I read The Romulan Way by Diane Duane and Peter Morwood! Overall, it was quite enjoyable, but I have some conflicting feelings about it. (Please come discuss it with me!)

(Spoilers Ahead)

This is an unusual book, as it features an original character as the main character (Lt. Terise Haleakala, posing as a Romulan head servant in order to better understand and report on their civilization), with Bones being asked to check up on her to make sure that she hasn’t fully “gone Romulan” after a two-year hiatus in contact. To get himself into Romulan space, he needs to get himself captured by Romulan officers who have a specific grudge against the officers of the Enterprise. He also needs to check up on Terise and get out before his automatic death sentence is painfully carried out, either in a preapproved “scenic execution pit” or behind the scenes by a Romulan willing to pay the highest price for his head. Of course, we don’t find out about this mission until much later on in the book, leaving us to assume for much of it that he’s just been captured, as usual.

The good:

Bones being Bones. Diane Duane and Peter Morwood’s Bones is great; unsurprisingly, they really understand both him and the Trek universe. His first scene in the ship, communicating with the Sulamid (shades of the “Planet Forbidden” exchange in Wrath of Khan) and then being a total badass with the Romulan leader and being as self-sacrificing as usual, even if it also turns out to be in service of a greater plan, was excellent. (There was a LOT of collateral damage here for a covert one-person mission. You’d think Bones would be even more perturbed about that than he is, but that would have spoiled the reveal of his purpose in the narrative).

Terise is a pretty solid new character; fleshed-out, interesting, conflicted, resourceful, successful, and refreshingly, a female character not there for any romantic purpose. She’d be cool to follow in her further adventures.

Terise’s immediate understanding of Bones’ “gentleness,” and his dislike of antagonism other than a shield:

Bones getting the undercover agent to break purely by purposefully being as annoying as possible.

Some good banter:

McCoy being the one to think of coating the Horta Starfleet officer’s body in Teflon so that the oxygen wouldn’t hurt him, because of course he creates more than one healing technology for this completely out-of-the-box species using duct tape and a dream.

Naraht (the Horta officer) in general, especially bantering with Bones who’s mother-henning him to eat more rocks so that he can grow up big and strong.

H’daen, Terise’s house lord and a complicated Romulan with a conscience - and numerous Romulans who don’t all behave the same way.

Bones using the Romulan filibuster method to stay his execution for as long as possible, saving his own life by ranting about everything under the sun, from criticizing the hypocrisies embedded in Romulan culture to discoursing on mint juleps, which is just so Bones that it’s amazing.

Random Sarek namedrop during one of the chapters on Romulan history, described as a “grimly handsome gentleman.”

This WAY too prophetic line about government:

“You have your own worlds to save.” Bones: “All of them.” <3

The middle:

The Romulan backstory was intriguing and very fleshed-out, but I also flipped forward to see how long the chapter was every time we went back to it, because for a story involving a heck of a lot of death and war, it was fairly dry. I wanted to know it, but I also wanted to keep reading the main story.

The “enhancing Bones’ brain with a chip so that he’s a recording device” was odd, but kind of fun, and did explain a lot of things. I enjoyed his musings about and discomfort with it. Felt like payback for Spock’s Brain and the remote control. I think they could have gotten into the implications of it for the character more, as he has a lot of trauma surrounding people messing with his brain, especially telepaths - which means that a mission like that would probably bring it to the surface. Though this didn’t really decrease my enjoyment of the novel, I kind of prefer when beloved characters succeed on their own attributes, rather than random technology enhancements (this is not a criticism of assistive tech at all - it’s just more narratively interesting when Jim Kirk bluffs his way out of a scenario using intuition than “Jim Kirk ate phlebonium and wins because he can now jump 20 feet in the air”).

The “hmmm…”:

I get that they wanted Bones to record a Romulan trial and get a feel for the Senate while he was there, which necessitated him to stay for the “trial,” even though the reasoning felt a bit tenuous as an excuse for a dramatic escape. I’m not sure I understand the purpose of essentially exploding the trial hall and killing a bunch of Romulans as Bones’ exit plan. Wasn’t this supposed to be a relatively covert operation, for Bones to check up on their spy’s mental health? I guess it took all suspicion off her, but it was a hell of a way to stage it.

I love Bones. He’s 100% my fave. But I really, really missed his interactions with Kirk and Spock when he’s totally on his own, and the fact that, other than accompanying him to the initial meeting to plan the incursion, we have no idea what the other two are doing. My favourite long-form Trek fic, Equilibrium, separates the trio for two-thirds of the story, but they’re all still very much in each other’s thoughts and influenced by what the others would do. I got a feeling of almost total separation from the book, other than Bones wryly thinking that, if something a Starfleet officer said as a compliment led to his current predicament, he’d take Spock’s insults any time (and thinking about Spock every time a Romulan or Romulan in disguised raised an eyebrow). His interactions with Terise and Naraht are good, but nothing beats the chemistry of the Triumvirate.

The pre-epilogue ending fell flat for me. Though it was cool that their rescuer was the aunt of the Romulan Commander from The Enterprise Incident, the space boss battle felt really unnecessary; if the story is about Bones and Terise, the climax is now basically something that essentially takes neither of their skills to resolve, so the main characters are either not on “screen,” or are just kind of hanging out.

Plus, the introduction of Ensign I Love Danger (the ironically-named Luks) only a few pages before he sacrificed himself made it fairly difficult to care deeply about his heroic sacrifice in and of itself. He worked as an analogue to a young Kirk, and maybe we could have explored that more in Bones’ reaction to his presence and death. Maybe that seemed too obvious to the writers, like it would have been hitting us over the head with the 2x4 of symbolism to make that any more clear. Really, it just made me miss the Bones-Jim dynamic, and felt like Ensign Ex Machina, without a greater thematic relation to the plot. Yes, I know sometimes in life things just happen in sequence, but that’s not as satisfying to read.

Leonard “Edward” McCoy gave me the same visceral reaction as James R(iberius) Kirk, even though I realize that both of these things happened before Horatio and Tiberius showed up, and I know Horatio is beta canon at best (from Provenance of Shadows, etc.) I just like it better.

Have you read the book? What did you think? Let me know!

#star trek #star trek tos #star trek book club #trek books #leonard mccoy #star trek books #bones mccoy #the romulan way #diane duane #peter morwood #i am uncomfortably aware that they're both on tumblr #because both of them have reblogged my posts #please don't read this

[softest-cinnamon-roll]

Omg u just posted part 2 but pleaseeee do the road trip au part 3. Whatever you want. With or without Sonia. I just LOVE reddie as parents and I need more of it in my life

part one || part two

“Are you sure this is a good idea, sis?” Ollie asked, looking down at his phone and then back up at his sister. “Dad thinks we’re visiting grandma and grandpa, he’ll go crazy if he finds out we’re here…” Glancing back at the house in front of them, Ollie swallowed.

Grace rolled her eyes and nodded her head, unbuckling from the car, “Well technically, she is still our grandma, just not the one we told dad we were going to visit. Not that I’m saying we won’t go and visit grandma and grandpa, but I just…I want answers.”

Even though Grace was a child when she had her first, and only encounter with her dad’s mother, the memory was still ingrained in her mind. She would never get over the way the woman had spoken to her dad, and then to her, in the middle of a supermarket that is.

“Okay fine, but after we’ve spoken to her we need to go to grandma and grandpas. Dad has probably already messaged them and they’ll be waiting for us.” Ollie sighed and Grace nodded before stepping out of the car and walking up to the porch.

Unlike her brother, she wasn’t nervous. She wanted answers. She wanted to know why someone would treat her dad the way his mother had. She may be her grandmother by blood, but in her heart? She was just another person in the world who was ignorant and selfish.

Grace kept her head high when she knocked on the door, firm and with purpose before stepping back. There was a noise behind the door before it swung open and Grace jumped back a little. The woman who answered the door wasn’t Sonia Kaspbrak, and Grace had to reset her brain as she considered maybe this was the wrong house.

“May I help you?” The woman asked, her eyes narrowing as she looked back and forth between Grace and Ollie. “I’m not looking to buy anything if that’s what you’re after.”

She moved to close the door and Grace jumped into action, stopping her with a shake of her head, “No, no uh, we’re looking for Sonia Kaspbrak? Is she home?”

The woman paused, blinking at the two of them before she sighed and crossed her arms. “Sonia passed away last week. Heart attack. I’m her sister, Marge.” She said. “What can I do for you?”

At the news, Grace felt a little heartless for the lack of emotion she felt over the fact that her other grandparent was dead. Though she wondered if anyone had been in contact with her dad. She doubted it, as apparently she passed away last week, and her dad hasn’t seemed off since then. Not even her Papa seemed off, and he couldn’t keep a secret to save himself.

“Oh I’m so sorry-” Ollie spoke up, as Grace had been silent for too long. “Uh, this might sound weird to you but we-” He stopped. “We’re her son, Eddie’s, children. Sonia’s grandchildren. We were in town and we wanted to, uh, connect with her?”

Grace rolled her eyes at her brother’s words and she finally found her voice, “Actually, no, Ollie is just being too polite. We weren’t here to connect, we were here for answers on why she treated our dad like shit. Since you’re her sister, I’m sure you’re aware. Would you be able to answer our questions?”

Marge, their great-aunt apparently, stared at the two of them for a second before nodding and stepping to the side, allowing them to come into the house. It wasn’t anything like Grace imagined and the thought of her dad growing up here made her shudder. “Please take a seat,” she motioned and both Grace and Ollie followed her instructions. “What would you like to know. I have to admit, I might not be able to answer everything but I will do my best.”

“Why did Sonia not want my dad and papa to be together?” Grace asked first, narrowing her eyes. “My dad being Eddie and Papa being Richie Tozier. I’m sure you know who he is.”

“Yes, I am familiar with who Richie Tozier is,” Marge sighed. “I can answer that. Sonia didn’t agree with homosexual relationships. It was against her religion. She also believed that Richard was corrupting Eddie and turning him against her. Which he did, in the end, as they ran away together without so much as a goodbye.”

Grace scoffed, crossing her arms, “They were in love with each other. Since when was being in love a crime? And my dad had every right to run away when he did, she was lying to him about his health! What kind of mother lies to a child about being sick? Ollie,” she pointed to her brother. “He has actual asthma, and do you know how difficult it was to get him diagnosed thanks to my dad’s child trauma? Too long!”

With a sigh, Marge shook her head, “Sonia wasn’t always like that. When Frank was still alive, they were a happy family. Yes, Sonia was a little wary of Eddie doing dangerous things, but Frank softened her out. When he passed away there was nothing stopping her from going insane.”

That was when Ollie finally decided to perk up, “But there was,” he said calmly. “There was you, and other family members. All you had to do was talk to her, and convince her she was being unreasonable. It wasn’t that hard, and yet…you didn’t bother did you?”

Marge gasped, “It wasn’t any of my business!” She hissed. “I wasn’t getting involved.”

“It was your business though!” Grace snapped. “Eddie was your nephew. He was family and I was raised to believe that family helped each other. Turns out it’s not the same for this family.”

The room fell into silence before Marge sighed once more, “Eddie left a lot of things behind, and they were put in the attic. I’ve sorted through it all. Would you like to take it?” She asked and Grace blinked, not expecting the question. “Some of the things were what he left behind before he ran away.”

Grace nodded, “Yes, we would definitely like to take it.” She stood up. “I think we’re done here though. Thank you for your time.”

Both Ollie and her helped take the boxes out into their rental car before driving the short distance to their grandma and grandpa Tozier’s house. When they got there, Maggie was out on the porch, running to greet them with kisses and promises of hot cocoa. Grace smiled and met her eyes with her brother, sharing a silent agreement.

Tomorrow they would call home and explain to their dad what happened, and what they had gained from the visit. Right now though, Grace was desperate for some of her grandma Maggie’s hot cocoa.

* * * * * 

@richietoaster @tozier-boy @eds-trashmouth @bitchbrak @sloppybitchreddie @its-stranger-than-you-think @maximusfraker @jem-carstairs-is-perfection @thejadeazalea @halfway-happy353 @tinyarmedtrex @inthebreadbinwrites @kat-ships-everything @takeourpure @lo-v-ers @that-weird-girls-blog @studpuffin @s-s-georgie @reddie-for-anything @trashmouthtozierr @richietoizer @girasol-eddie @bi-bi-richie @honeybeehanlon @mars-14 @reddiesetandgo @marsisaplanetyall @xandertheundead @sedanleystanley @hawkinsbabe @beepbeeprichiellc @stellarbisexual @oldguybones @thundercatseddie @eduardoandale  @purplepoisonedgem @reddie-to-cryy @pink-psychic @violetreddie @deadlighten @queen-sock @appojoos @moonlightrichie @rreddies @disneyfan567 @annxmatron @lifesucksheres20bucks @anellope @roobarrtrashmouth @are-you-reddie-for-it @callmechee @nancynwheeler @reddieforlove @twoidiotsinl0ve @madi-artist @tozierking @s-onora @atownofeggs

#reddie #richie tozier #eddie kaspbrak #writing tag

[ghost1643]

Headcanons of a tmnt AU I did in middle school

Mainly Venus so be warned. I am so sorry to my followers. Lol

Venus:

Venus’s was born a human boy who’s mother died in a car crash shortly after they were born. Their father went mad trying to find a way to revive her which eventually results in him working with the krang. He experimented on his three children eventually turning his youngest, Venus to a turtle when she was three. He physically abused her along the same time while her aunt..well we’ll mention her later.

Once she’s turned into a turtle he tries to kill her since he find he can no longer mutate her. Her brother helps her escape into an alley way where he tells her to just wait. However he never comes back. Instead his father gets him. While Venus waits some drunk homeless men finds her and demands food her brother snuck her in her tiny backpack. When she refuses to give him any, he almost beats her almost to death. She’s rescued by splinter who promptly adopts her and names her after Galileo which is short lived name.

She grows up close to Mikey. Yet, she’s also an easy child. She’ll do anything anyone asks because she doesn’t want to be abused or abandoned again. However she still plays pranks with Mikey while believing her brother will come back for her one time.

While Mikey is into a human stunt show and Leo is into a star trek show, Venus is into a sailor moon like tv show. She loves sailor moon so much that eventually she asks splinter when she’s gonna be a girl like sailor moon. When splinter asks what she means she explains that since she’s a girl shouldn’t she get to look like sailor moon too. Splinter accepts this and lets her rename herself Venus. As for the boys, they just grew use to her being a girl just around them, so they’re just relived they don’t have to worry around spilenter anymore.

She gets sick a lot after she turns six since her body was experimented on. So she doesn’t train much. In turn she works on her interest in arts came from. This ends with her obtaining an amazing art skill which always has her drawing hyper realalistic objects and people.

Mikey hangs out with her a lot thus creating a strong bond between them. They’re almost like twins. It’s to the point where he begs for a tutu for her at one point.

Donnie admires her art skills and helps her learn math. She’s good at everything up to graphs. She’s got a bone to pick with graphs.

Ralph treats her like a rival until she finally gets in on a training session with them. Once shes training is he smacks her which some how end up with her really hurt. She’s sobbing in pain looking death,y pale memories of her bio father abuse flashing through her head while Ralph rushes off to get their dad. After that point on he’s nicer and more kind to her than his other family members.

Leo thinks she’s a Great artist and funny. They however argue with each other a lot over her not training as much as they do. Despite this theytill love each other.

Splinter treats her like a daddy’s girl since she gets so sick so often and seems to have a form of mental health issues such as ptsd from her past life. He however is more tough on her about everyday things like going to the surface fearfully she’ll be more likely to die. Heck he thinks her mental health issues make her more likely to give in and die at any time.

When the boys meet April in the 2012 version, when she’s sick with the flu stuck in bed with only splinter, tv and Ralph’s pet spike for comfort. However when they bring April to the sewers to meettheie father Venus instantly realizes she’s a legalism. However she ignores her feelings seeing as aprilis obviously straight and Donnie loves her.

She gets worried about these feelings. Sure the bus and her father can accept her as a girl but, what about her liking girls. The boys can like girls, they don’t have to worry about seeming to masculine. They don’t have to worry about their family thinking they’re messed up. Either way she keeps it to herself as she behind to training to keep her anxiety Down. Eventually she breaks and confines herself in spike, Ralph’s pet turtle. She starts sharing everything with him since he’s just a pet and can’t tell anyone. So she begins to calm down and allows herself to get closer to April. They become good friends while all becomes good again.

That is until you know, spike gets mutated into a turtle like them. She started to freak out knowing he’ll tell her secrets. She freaks and is obviously uncomfortable around him. Spike waits until they’re alone before he tells her straight up he’s not going to put her and she should come out as a lesbian when she feels cmoftable too. She just smiled an dhugs him as an instant bond is created. Mikey on the other hand walks in, sees them hug and just jumps a step assuming they’re in love.

Anyways unlike in the 2012 show spike stays around after a fight with Leo. He becomes like a cousin of sorts whom Venus enjoys trying to teach math to. He trains with the male’s and soon begins going on missions with them. Soon he gets an okay and Venus goes on a few minion missions with them. She actually becomes part of a big happy team for a while. Then the shred is introudced

He collapses a building on the team pinning Ralph under some debree. Spike rushes in to save him but, doesn’t come back out. The floor opens up allowing spike to drop to his ‘death’. Venus proves herself by saving Ralph.

As for Ralph, he stays silent all the way home seeing as he just watched his best friend die. He explains this to splinter and Venus sketches a picture to remember spike by. She works late into the night before realizing only her and Ralph are left always. He steps on spikes old toy on his Wha to bed. She joked baoyt the toy being louder than spike ever was. Ralph laughs before breaking down in sobs only to promptly have his sister hug him tightly.

Ralph soon refuses to leave his room suffering from a mild moment of depression. To cheering him up Mikey tries pulling pranks which fails. Leo offers to let Ralph kick his butt which fails. Donnie makes him a robot turtle which almost works. Yet, late at night Venus sneaks into his room and drags him out at night which for the record she’s only ever planne dto Do once before. She takes him out to a place marked to be torn down and lets him go bat shit crazy on it. The week the place before meeting Casey Jones, who’s a trans man in this AU. This ends up with case and Ralph becoming fast friends

They sneak back in undetected and Ralph is bakc this normal self now. Except he won’t go anywhere alone anymore scared he’ll be almost killed again if he is. So he’s a little damaged. Eventually he introduce Casey to the family and he’s accepted into the family more than his own.

Soon Mikey is searching for a friend. This ends up with him sneaking out at night a lot. One night Venus catches him sneaking out. She’s gets concerned and tells Leo what she saw knowing he’s the best at following people. So they both head out with Ralph and Donnie for back up following Mikey.

They follow him to a sewer system with Leather face in it. Leather face attacks ether other until he gets a good look at Venus’s eyes. Once he does he stops attacking and calls Venus by her old human name. As soon as he does her memories come back as the world gets darker around her. She can hear her father screaming as he pops her shoulder routine of place. She cane feels the needles being wedged into her skin. She gpcan hear her sister breathing her for being the ‘favourite’. She can feel her aunts hand on her getting lower and lower until she star5 screaming as loud as she can before fainting.

That my friends is the result of Venus first anxiety attack. She faints in a sewer.

Donnie and Ralph carry her back home where splinter breathes them for sneaking out. Ralph feels guilty. Meanwhile leather face is just confused as to whyvenus fainted and freaked out about being called her dead name. Mikey sits him down and explains about Venus being transgender along with what it means. It take a while but, Leather head comes around still being a little confused. After all it’s the same person/mutant, just a different gender.

When Venus wakes up Leather face apologizes. He just sits there chatting with her making her feel a bit better. Mikey comes with him. Then soon the whole family is getting to know Leather face and they all just talking getting to know the difference between their lives now. As they do leather face just mentioned he was mutated shortly after something happened but that was it. Venus is just to tired to ask.

She dozes off again as her brother head off to bed as spiel goes to the room she’s staying in since her dad’s gone missing. Casey head home when splinter asks what happened to make him like this. Leatherface dances around the issuer before reaching two years after Venus and her brother had tried to run away, one of her father’s experiments killed her brother. As for Venus’s older sister, she grew cold. Cold enough to attempt to kill her father. Her father fought back knocking over Leather faces tank. Leather face rushed off before seeing the outcome but,had heard her scream and seen a gush of blood on the window. He got half way the sewer when the krange, an alien race her father worked with found him.they made him into this before turning him into this.

Splinter decides to wait to tell Venus her biological family is long gone. In the meantime Leather face lives with them and helps them train incase the orang come to the sewers to getthem. Venus becomes a better fighter making Leo proud. Leatherface bond with splinter over both of them having forms of ptsd over watching their loved ones die. He helped ralphchnanel his anger.

Soon he sees t fit to leave and moves into a different sewer system to help other mutants like him. As soon as he’s free, Karai steps into the picture during Venus’s first big mission with Leo. Leo crushes on karai for a bit while Venus justhas to deal with being the on,y sane one when it comes to ideas on Karai during the mission.

Long story short Leo’s maskgets ripped and Venus just gets snippy seeing as Karai literally tried to kill Leo when he spared her. Then it happens again. And again. And again. So needless to say she hates Karai towards the end of it.

Then Donnie gets kidnapped by the foot clan who think he has in formation on how to reverse the mutatagion for a reason I can’t find but I remember being a big deal. I think Shreder had bend slightly exposed to it and wanted a way to reverse the effects. Anyways it comes down to Mickey and Venus being in a control room looking for his cell while Leo and Ralph fight off the soldiers. They begin losing heavily.

Ralph says “well guys if this is it I guess it’s time to admit that I don’t actually hate you all. You’re the bets family I could ask for.” This ends up with last minute admitions.

Leo admits “Mikey I secretly like all of your jokes. I just pretend their childish.”

Mikey’s admits to breaking Venus’s sailor moon doll when they were five that she just loved more than anything.

Venus just is silent before a bulletproof whooshes by her head nearly missing her. She realizes this might acatully be it. It might be the end and she was never true to herself fully abou who she was. Not true about what happened to her. So she just says it. “I’m a lesbian.” Yet, she really Wabtedto admit to something else too.

Needless to say there’s a moment of silence before Ralph spins around yelling what. Thankfully they survive but, there’s a bit of awkward tension as Venus breaks Donnie out of his cell. He didn’t ask what happened until they’re safe on the top of a building. Ralph just chuckles mumbling not to worry about it until Venus tells him. Donnie doesn’t mind but is curious.

Venus waits until two days late retell him in private. Donnie just hugs her instead of distancing himself like Ralph as begun to. Mikey acts like nothing changed. Leo meanwhile just lays in her room waiting until he knows splinter isn’t around before gushing about women with her. It’s the most the two have ever gotten along. After Donnie heals nothing really changes except him joking about building her a robot girlfriend. Ralph meanwhile distance himself which hurts Venus a lot, she puts more focus into training until she gets sick..again.

While she’s laying in bed trying to nap Ralph sneaks in.

“Hey you up?” “Yeah I am now.” “I....I know I’ve been distant but it’s just...well I know it’s still you. I mean you’re still my sister...it’s just you know..” “Ralph it’s fine.” “No, no it’s not fine. I know I’ve probably been hurting you..I realized it this morning..and I...look I figured you needed a lot of things to support you. I would like to be one of them so I did some research and uh...well me and Casey got you something.”

He drops a heart pin that’s split in two. One part is the trans flag and the other is the lesbian pride flag. Needless to say Venus cries and hugs Ralph close who just happily returns it.

Soon she comes out to Casey first about being lesbian. He doesn’t care mush seeing as Ralph let it slip but lets her know he’s here if she ever what’s to talk. As for April, she comes out as bisexual to her at the same time. Long story short Venus finds out she’s not her type but, Casey is. However she hides it from her father.

Anyways soon the turtles find what looks like a mutant lizard named moan Lisa who’s on edge. She tries to gut Leonardo but, is okay with Ralph. Then Venus notices Ralph being nice to her and actually blushing when she looks at him. She puts two and two together joking with him about meeting hsi true love. He just argues back with her as they move Mona in with them until they can get her another safer place to stay. Mona soon finds herself bonding with the turtles while getting really friendly with Ralph.

Venus and Mikey make bets on who will start the first kiss. Donnie finds out and joins saying t will be an accidental kiss. Leo’s bets they will never kiss. Then splinter finds out and bets they will kiss when Mona leaves.

Meanwhile Mona seems on edge. Soon she admits to not being a mutant but an alien who’s species in at war with the Krange. She came here to find help or their secret weapon which she did. It’s the mutangeon which Venus’s dad helped make into a weapon. And she did find help in the form of other Mutants who are in hiding throughout New York. She rushes to get back to her ship to keep her species from invading to find the information out by rove. However before she leaves she kisses Ralph before giving him her contact and rushing off.

Yeah well the turtles each lose a bet to splinter.

From what I can Remember the story continues to follow them as the turtles try to find the other mutants to help Mona’s species. They find mondo gecko who’s nonbianry and low key flirts with Mikey a lot who is to clueless to catch onto this. A bunch of other mutants move in with leather face and train Incas ether are neede dto for the alien war.

Karai gets into a battle with theturtles and ends up stuck in a building with Venus. They are forced to work together and get to know each other better becoming frenamies. Leo confesses his love for Karai whom rejects him but, offers to be friends. He accepts but cries in private...then Splinter regales Karai is his long lost daughter and Leo feels like he dodged a huge bullet.

Mikey also gets a sort a human love interest from April’s school. She’s into video games, anime and loves his jokes. Heck she even has her own cat who loves ice cream kitty.

Casey and April start going out making Donnie a bit upset. In the end he’s just happy if she’s happy. Venus finds out he’s a bit upset and takes him out on a night on the town for fun. Once there they have the time of their lives.

Leo starts to get crushes on male mutants they find and female mutants. He confines these feelings in Venus who supports him fully. Then he comes out and gets more support from everyone. Two days later, with support from Leo, comes out to splinter. Splinter just hugs her tightly before hugging love to just happy they’re being true to themselves.

April sneaks Venus out to a pride march. Once there she’s assumed to be a furry of sorts. She gets embarrassed as a few people crack jokes but, soon discovers they accept her no matter what.

Donnie finds out where Venus’s mom is hurried and takes her there on her birthday. After all she’s always wanted to meet her mom. Venus brings flowers and just cries happy tears talking about how she was so proud to meet her mom at all. Like it’s emotional enough to make Donnie cry. He doesn’t have the heart to make her leave so, he just sits there talking with Venus and her mom for hours when the other brothers show up. They all take to her before heading home by night falls. After that night Venus fists her grave every other month just to talk.

Splinter tells the kids what the shredder did to his family.he gets a lot of hugs from Venus after wards.

Karai finds out the truth and breaks into the sewer to meet her dad. He moves her in without thought and she shares a room with Venus. They bond a bit more since Venus is staying in her room a lot, still constantly sick while Karaiis just being locked in a room for protection for a while. Then she helps all the turtles train. It’s a little awkward between her and Leo but soon it gets to a normal brother sister relationship. She offers to se Venus up too which is awkward before she realizes Venus Is a lesbian. Then it goes more awkward when she apologizes like every five second about not knowing sooner.

Karai gets curious and asks Casey and Venus about dysmorphia. The two a very blunt about how it makes them feel like everything in their body is wrong down to a depressing note. It ends with Karai baking cupcakes to cheer them up which surprisingly works.

Casey comes clean to Ralph about being abused as a child one night. He just gets mad and yells before just breaking down and admitting his mom is sometimes drunk and beats him. Ralph gets worried and asks splinter what he should do. All splinter says is have him move in. As Ralph goes to get his friend Venus just breaks a bit and is a bit more jumpy. Everyone ignores ituntil a week later splinter asks her about it. Genus just break bfeore hinging at her father abusing her.

Shredder gets a hold of Karai again and mutates her into a snake like creature but unlikes in the 2012 show she doesn’t go insane. She can control hersefl a little. Leo calms her down enough to get her to come home. Once there everyone bands together to help her with her new mutant powers. Which goes well for once.

April’s dad is rescued from a krange base. He moves into a farm house with April and brings Casey with him. He also brings a few Mutangs to help April train for what mught happen. Yet, April calls the turtles every night to talk with them.

Leo falls for a certain rabbit samurai, who in this AU is a disowned young teen whom was mutated during a pride celebration turned kidnapping. A rabbit samurai who feelsthe same way.

Mona comes back for a visit. She helps rescue a few more mutants befeore officially going on a date with Ralph...too April’s new house. Either way it works. They start going out.

Karai with her family’s support fists her mother grave. Then fists Venus’s with her.

The krange team up with the foot clan sending an assaying after the turtles. The turtles fight back but Leo is badly injured by a assaying Karai knows to well. The assaying almost behaved her twice by her father orders. However the turtles are able to fight her off and get Leo in a card. The family starts to leave and gets half way gone when the assaying rips down the door. Venus fights her off before she is demasked showing her eyes to the assaying who just freezes. She closes her eyes preparing for an attack when she hear her voice. “Brother?”

Venus looks up seeing her sisters famous blue eyes yet, in a turtle form.one with scars and scratches and bruises. She just is frozen in place before kicking her sister off. Venus starts yelling that she knew what she did. She told her father about them trying to leave. She wrecks dtheir escape. Her sister wa the reason her brother died. All her older sister does is freeze up before being kicked outside onto the road as they escape to a farm house.

Once there Venus what’s until Leo is safe and everyone is asleep to cry. She cries heavily as her sister just is numb knowing she tried to kill her brother, the only family member she has left.

~~~~~~~~~~……~~~~~~

That was all I came up with in order before the end of season three I think. I had a few other idea but couldn’t fit them in becaus dto he honest it focused on Leo healing from his psychic scaring his fight left behind and Venus healing from the mental scarring her family left behind.

Venus was supported to have a few more run ins with her sister whom never got names, but I know I am now happy to call Jenika. Jenika was supposed to a cold rouyhless killer who hates everyone but has deep rooted sadness.

Venus was also supposed to get a girlfriend who I never decided on a sign for. Mikey’s love interest was supposed to help out more with Leo’s healing process and keeping an eye out for mutangs in new York for them. A certain rabbit samurai vista Leo a lot while he heals falling mode in love with him. Specials father becomes more accepting to mutangs n venal.

I just didn’t know how to write it is all but if this gets a lot of attention I could write more I guess.i mean I have no idea but if anyone had any recommendations for her girlfriend let me know.

#reblogs welcome #tmnt #tmnt 2012 #venus's story #tmnt venus de milo #i need this #part one? #venus tmnt #tmnt venus #venus de milo #tmnt au #nottcest #lgtbtq #lgbtq au #my idea #tmnt fic

[angelcatsiel]

I reblogged an ask game thing the other day but no one sent any asks so I just fuckin answered them all because I was bored and I am learning to not give a fuck what anyone thinks of me and it was fun

1. What is your favorite childhood story of yourself?

This is a hard one. I want to think of a funny one but my childhood wasn’t great. My dad has told me that when I was a toddler, before I can remember, he used to play AC/DC and I used to put clothes pegs in my hair for some unknown reason, stand on the sofa and violently headbang.

2. What is the stupidest way you have ever gotten hurt?

When I was about 11, I was swinging on a swing in the garden, and got curious about what would happen if I put my hands right at the very bottom of the chains while I was swinging. The answer was that I fell off backwards and hit my head. I went in to my dad crying, calmed down, and went back on the swing again. I tried to work out what exactly I had done to cause myself to fall off. I remember thinking, I think I held the chains near the bottom like this... and tested the theory, and fell off again, and hit my head again.

This is one of many stupid injuries. Other considerations were the time I climbed up a slide and hit my head on the bar at the top and knocked myself out, or the time I got kicked by a horse in a field and grabbed onto the electric fence to hold myself up.

3. What was the first PG-13 movie you watched?

Literally no idea.

4. What was the first R rated movie you watched?

I think it may have been the first Deadpool? Haven’t seen that many tbh

5. When was the moment you felt most badass?

When I was about 8, I was at the park with my brother, and this much older kid (maybe about 16 or 17, hardly a kid) with an aggressive dog stole my brother’s ice cream money. I marched up to him and demanded he give it back. He let his dog off the lead and it sniffed around my ankles and growled, and he told me it would bite me if I ran. I stood there and stared him down for a good 20 seconds or so before he called back the dog and walked away. I didn’t get the money back.

6. What is a band you can reliably always love?

Marillion. Favourite band, always.

7. What is your favorite form of self expression?

Probably singing even though I’m very bad at it.

8. What is something from your childhood you wish you still had?

My stuffed rabbit Hoppy. I haven’t been able to find him in several years. Can’t think about it too hard or I’ll cry.

9. Where is your favorite place on earth?

The Isle of Wight. My dad used to take me and my brother there for holidays every few years. It’s beautiful and full of memories, the most precious memories being the time we saved up vouchers in the newspaper to go the year after my dad left his abusive wife and ended up homeless. We were so poor but with the vouchers we could just afford to go, and it was the first time I saw my dad happy in a long time.

10. What is the longest friendship you have ever had?

My best friend @van-helsa124 who I have known since literally nursery and I love her so much.

11. Is there anyone is your life you wish you had met sooner than you did?

Maybe my friend Luce who I only met a couple of years ago, but we’ve grown close pretty quick.

12. Do you believe in ghosts?

Yep definitely. Pretty sure I was visited by my gran after she died and I’ve had a few creepy experiences.

13. What is the coldest water you have ever swam in?

No idea tbh, I don’t swim much

14. How old were you when you learned how to swim?

Maybe 8 or 9? I had lessons in primary school.

15.  What song do you listen to when you’re sad?

Never Grow Up by Taylor Swift. It’s my cry song.

16. Are you an adrenaline junky?

Yep! Love roller coasters and stuff like that, and would love to do something extreme like jump out of a plane or something.

17. What is a song that takes you back to childhood?

I have a few but the main ones are probably Man on the Moon by REM, and You Were Right by Badly Drawn Boy.

18. What is your favorite word?

Not sure I have one. For some reason the only one coming to mind is a place not too far from where my family live called Biggleswade, and I have to say it every time we drive past because I love saying it. I also love saying tiddies at every opportunity.

19. What is your least favorite word?

Don’t think I have a least favourite either, the usual infamous ones (e.g. moist) don’t really bother me.

20. What scent reminds you of childhood?

Cherryade. I drank some several years ago and the smell before I tasted it transported me immediately back to my childhood and a memory I’d completely forgotten, which was my gran constantly buying me a shit ton of cherryade every time I stayed over her house.

21. Were you sad when you found out clouds weren’t like pillows, or did you never think that?

I don’t think I was sad, I think I was just curious and interested to learn, and I tried to come up with new interesting ways of describing the feeling of clouds in my head, since even as a kid I loved to write.

22. When in life did you laugh the hardest?

A few times come to mind and they all involve @van-helsa124. A lot would make absolutely no sense, no matter how much I tried to explain. They’re now ‘friendship memes’. The only one that might be explainable is the first time we ever got drunk, to celebrate achieving ultimate friendship, after we found out that her mum had believed me and her were in a relationship for a year and a half. We even created our own drink, named the year and a half, which was literally just a mix of vodka, koppaberg, rose wine and cloudy lemonade. Tasted better than it sounds. Got me drunk in about 0.5 seconds. Ended the night hugging her trash can trying not to throw up while she read me a destiel fanfic to take my mind off feeling sick

23. What makes you laugh when you don’t feel like laughing?

Old yogscast videos.

24. Do you come from a big family?

Fairly big, lots of aunts and uncles and cousins.

25. What is your favorite part of yourself?

My positivity and the inner strength that I have, that helps me find happiness and courage even when my mental health is low.

26. What is the worst pain you have ever felt?

Trigeminal neuralgia pain (facial nerve pain). Spent 90% of January this year constantly crying and even screaming in pain. Hospital couldn’t do anything for me. I get occasional flare ups now but nothing that severe, but it’s probably going to come back. Feels like someone trying to rip out my cheekbone and jawbone or like someone is literally drilling into the bones in my face, and that’s the milder part. Every so often that pain is interrupted by stabs of sharper pain like electric shocks which have caused me to collapse to the floor screaming. 0/10 do not recommend

27. Do you swear often?

Not super often out loud but very often in my head.

28. Do you get confused for being older or younger than you are?

People always assume I’m younger than I am. I get asked for ID for everything.

29. What is your favorite way to eat a potato?

Probably roast potatoes, but they’ve gotta be done right. Soft inside, crispy outside, and obviously with herbs and spices.

30. What is the best compliment you have ever received?

Honestly no idea.

31. Describe yourself in 6 words?

Slightly unstable yet somehow happy weirdo

32. What is the worst insult you have ever received?

Can’t think of any major insults either lmao no one talks to me apparently

33. Have you ever taken in any media that changed your life?

The Good Place and Supernatural. With supernatural it wasn’t the actual show so much as the friendships it made me and the confidence and happiness the conventions gave me, at a time when my mental health was at its worst, although the show helped massively too. Idc if it’s cringey, it kept me alive. The Good Place changed my entire worldview and actually made me less afraid of death.

34. Have you ever collected anything?

My model horses! I have at least 10 at this point

35. Strangest thing you have ever broken?

As in bones or objects? Can’t think of any objects and the only time I ever broke a bone was when I broke my toe at like 12:01am on new year’s day when I got up to pour myself another drink and tripped over the table

36. Weirdest food you have ever eaten?

I’m not that adventurous with food so nothing that weird

37. Childhood nickname?

My dad would call me Flo. Not sure why.

38. Most people you have shared a bed with in a non sexual manner?

Two. Shared a bed with my best friend and my other friend Josh, once at a convention, once at Josh’s birthday. Birthday one is a bit blurry as I was drunk but at the convention I got to be in the middle and spooned Josh while my best friend spooned me and it was very cosy

39. What is something that makes you fall asleep?

The Marillion song Angelina, or this one ASMR video that’s supposed to be the sound of being in the Impala with the Winchesters. Laugh all you want, I like it.

40. Did your parents ever accidentally lose or forget you?

No but my teacher did once, can’t remember the context, I think she had to drive me and some other girls somewhere for some club event and when we got back to the school she forgot me in the car because I was so quiet lmao

41. If you were a superhero what would your weakness be?

I would be a terrible superhero and have many weaknesses. Loud noises would immediately put me out of action. Someone makes eye contact with me and I disintegrate immediately

42. What food reminds you of home?

Tuna pasta! With this one specific sauce that my mum used to make it with

43. What is your comfort food?

Probably also that tuna pasta. And chocolate. A shit ton of chocolate.

44. Cold room with lots of blankets or hot room with no blankets?

Cold room with lots of blankets, no question.

45. No shoes without socks or no shoes with socks?

No shoes without socks

46. Do you run hot your cold?

I am presuming this means ‘do you run hot or cold’ and the answer is, usually, both simultaneously. My body has no idea what temperature regulation is. Catch me out for a walk in short sleeves in the snow, sweating profusely while violently shivering bc I’m feeling extremely hot internally but my skin is freezing (and yes, I have actually done this). Do I have some sort of legit medical issue? No one knows, least of all my doctors!

47. Favorite condiment?

Probably ketchup. Though I also love garlic dip. Does that count as a condiment?

48. What utensil do you use the most?

Probably my tongs for turning chicken and stuff

49. When are you most comfortable?

Any time I’m home alone, just doing my own thing

50. If you could be really good at one thing, what would it be?

Singing! I would love to be an amazing singer but sadly I am a terrible singer though I do practice every day in the vain hope that maybe my voice will improve. If the neighbours could hear me they would have killed me by now

#personal

[neshabeingchildish]

22. Mr. and Mrs. Jasper Dunlop

I’ve been away from this story for a long while, because of my mental health, but definitely have decided that I will complete it, no matter what. Since I figured I wouldn’t be writing a ton of Chasper stories, I knew this one would be long, because I’d wanna include all my Chasper indulgences in it. It’s gonna be coming to an ending soon. Hopefully, the way I have been feeling won’t bleed too much into the mood of the story. I know it definitely did at a few points, but I’m just praying that overall, the story will turn out in the tone that I intended for this story and this ship. Thanks for reading. 

OH! And since I mentioned them a few times and I have them with lines and such, my FCs for these OCs are Fisher: Tanner Stine and New Henry/Craig: Davont’e Franklin.

Also, I gave up on editing at some point, so... that’s what that is. And wedding aesthetics will be out at some point soon.

Mr. and Mrs. Jasper Dunlop

Piper was bummed that she would have to miss Henry’s college graduation, but she made sure to threaten to beat him senseless as soon as she recovered if he didn’t proceed with his plans for the evening. He hadn’t planned much. Graduation ceremony, dinner with the family, and chillaxing with Charlotte and Jasper. It was good to have Jake and Siren in a room together without it being terrible. They both felt so bad about Piper that they forgot their issues for a while and just got along and supported her. In the break up, both had sort of put her in the middle and made her feel like she had to choose. She’d chosen Henry, because he was the only person that she felt could relate. Now, she was in the hospital, fixing her makeup to address her followers, and wishing she could be at her brother’s graduation.

Henry was fine. With Piper assuring him that his presence could have in no way helped her outcome, he could finally relax. He could just enjoy the moment… sort of. It was weird to not have her there. They’d spent a lot of time together since she found out that he was Kid Danger and they spent even more time together since their parents broke up. She was supposed to be here. Charlotte agreed to make sure that she captured every possible moment of Henry’s special evening, so it could be like Piper was there the whole time. 

Afterwards, he, Jasper and Charlotte went to hang out at the hospital with Piper. She was stuck in there for about 3 days and whenever she was released, she had Henry bring her to Jake’s place. She was going to need some nursing back to full recovery and she didn’t want to get in Henry’s way of Kid Danger things.

Henry, instead was immediately throwing himself into revamping the store. Nate had been working on things for over a year and they were ready to reopen the place, remodeled. Some of the former junk and stuff things were on the upper floor and arranged to look more like a gift and antique shop than junk. Anything that looked too “junk-like,” Piper and Henry had cleared out during a garage sale in front of the store. Everything else, she took charge of organizing on that floor and they plastered the old Junk N’ Stuff sign on the back wall, sort of like a novelty, honestly for their own nostalgia. Because, outside of the place was a new sign, with lettering that Piper had picked and a name that they had decided on together, “Heart Eyes” with a heart symbol for the “E,” so technically, “Hart Eyes,” and the tagline, “You’ll see something you’ll love here.”

Entering the store, it was like a little department store in that it had various stations - a fabrics and frames, jewelry and accessories, juice and smoothie bar and the florist center. They were near the walls, the florist being to the right, whenever you first came in, bar to the left and the others towards the back. The middle of the store was a boutique of formals and gifts. 

“This is actually really great, right?” Henry asked Piper. He knew that she would always be honest.

“Yeah. It’s amazing Henry. I’m super proud of you.” She clapped him on the shoulder and they both smiled. They were gonna be alright. They were gonna do well. He was sure of it. The worst had to be over… They turned towards the door hearing some laughter, ready to greet a guest. It was just Jake and Ray. Piper sighed and rolled her eyes. She and her dad were working on their relationship, but this new friendship with Ray of his was weird and uncomfortable for her.

“Yo!” Henry cheered. “If it isn’t my two dads…” He joked. Both men began to laugh very vigorously. More than he knew that joke was worth, so he asked, “What am I missing?”

“What? That wasn’t in reference to the comedy series with Paul Reiser?” Ray asked. “Because, if it wasn’t, I don’t get it.”

“Of course it was!” Jake said. “Oooh, I wonder if that show is streaming on anything.”

“Probably not. It was too good. But you know… Piper can probably pirate it for us.”

“You… would ASK my daughter to break the law?” Jake asked, folding his arms.

“No. I’d just tell her to do it and she’ll likely jump right in, because it’s fun for her to break the law. She loves that kinda stuff.”

Jake laughed, “You’re right.”

“Where are you two going?” Henry asked, knowing that Ray wasn’t going to share the Man Cave with Jake! 

“I’m getting my bag. Jake and I are having a sleepover at his house, if that’s okay?”

Henry folded his arms and said, “Well, you two better not stay up all night. Both of you have work in the morning. Also, I just checked every streaming service and no, My Two Dads is not on anything.”

Ray shook his head, “Figures.” He headed towards the back and screamed, “PIPER!!!” Jake waited with Henry and whenever Ray came back, with his bag, they left, shoulder to shoulder, talking about how funny My Two Dads used to be. Henry would have thought that was a made up thing, but he searched and it did come up. Totally real late 80s, early 90s show… though not about what he’d thought… 

He was thinking more along the lines of how he and Jasper used to say that they were gonna grow old together. If they were gonna have a kid, they’d get Charlotte to be a surrogate and Jasper would be a house dad while Henry supported the family on a hero’s salary. It was a perfect plan. At the end of high school senior year, that plan was picked apart. At the end of college, that plan was dust blowing in the wind. And a year later, that plan was replaced completely with the new and improved plan.

.

Welcome to the Wedding of Charlotte Ambrosia Page and Jasper TBD Dunlop...

Two years of planning made the wedding come together perfectly. While Jasper did have an additional year of college to complete in that duration, he landed a job at the firm where he was an intern, sooner than he expected and had been working there for half a year by the time of the wedding. And the wedding? Everything Jasper could have dreamed up and more! Henry was obviously amazing at this. Charlotte had gotten everyone that she knew who had a skill or product to offer involved. Piper was there, at her happiest and healthiest since the wreck.

Henry had told her, “Just worry about your little dress,” whenever she was asking about what kind of extravagant plans he would be entertaining for Jasper. That just made her worry more, when she really had nothing to worry about. 

The day of the wedding, she realized that the moms, Henry and Piper were on every little detail. They had Jasper’s frat bros and pledges to assist or serve, with the exception of the three that were actually a part of his wedding party. He would have had more, but Charlotte only had three friends, INCLUDING him, so even having three made her side unleveled. Fortunately, Schwoz was willing to stand in as a body to make things more symmetrical. He, Henry and Piper to Jasper’s Coogie, Snek and Fisher, with Henry handling Lady and Tramp, who kept the rings on their collars for safe keeping. 

Jasper and Charlotte had decided that the last entry in each of their affirmation journals for each other would be their wedding vows. Whenever they would finish reciting them, they’d finally give those to each other. They would also show each other their new affirmation journals during the gift exchange.

Processional

The wedding party all had on pastel yellow or orange with bright red, orange and yellow accessories. Jasper had a suit with a red floral jacket and red pants with gold accents. Technically, it was a women’s suit, but it was what he wanted, so they got it tailored to him and Charlotte had to admit that he not only pulled it off, but it was a LEWK. It was doing it for her. She was able to see him long before he could see her, and not because of bad luck or any other such nonsense. Because of good old fashioned, she was extremely busy trying to finish up everything at work before her small break, she had to squeeze in a party that was forced upon her, and the day of the actual wedding, her mother and Aunt Cohort insisted on keeping her apart from everybody, because her entrance had to be the most memorable part of the ceremony. Fucking Bolton women… Well… Cohort… was by marriage, but STILL. 

Luckily, Piper was posting in her stories and Charlotte’s phone hadn’t been taken away. She was SO GLAD whenever it was time for her mom and aunt to go have a seat. Then, whenever Henry came to retrieve her, give her the bouquet that he didn’t trust ANYONE touching until it was go time and let her pet her doggies before her dad had to walk her down the aisle.

Bride’s Entrance 

Henry went in first with the dogs in their miniature outfits that were made to look like a bride and groom, though they didn’t quite match Jasper and Charlotte. Tramp’s suit was red and she had on a floral crown, while Lady had on a white dress, nothing like Char’s and a veil. She had these little leg cuffs and people went crazy to see the doggos look so adorable, but it was time to stand for the bride and Jasper was excited, nervous, anxious, and eager, all at once. 

His pledges opened the doors and on Mr. Page’s arm was Charlotte, tiny and glowing -  not wearing heels, because she didn’t want to possibly fall today and not wearing her usual thick soles, because she simply didn’t have any that were wedding appropriate. “Oh my God,” Jasper said, along with a chorus of his frat bros. The dress that Charlotte had made was short in the front, long in the back, frilly kinda like a tutu at the bottom, but cascading behind her and had iridescent highlights in it that made it kind of twinkle and crystals on it that made it kind of sparkle. She was SUCH a sight, he didn’t even know what to do but try not to cry at this vision. 

She wore a luminous highlighter and a light shimmer on her skin, which was moisturized and radiant. Adanna made her jewelry of jasper, mock rubies, crystals and gold. And the bridal frohawk that she wore was adorned with sparkly gems and small flowers on the knotted twists. As she got closer, he could see that she put a heart in rhinestones around her “Yes” tattoo, and his heart could hardly handle any of this. The frat brothers began a chorus of big dog barking - that always put his head back in the game, but he figured that today was probably not a good day to go that route. He was appeased with Little Dog joined in with her tiny barking, and he was able to compose himself again.

Whenever Mr. Page passed her hands over to Jasper’s, he was all choked up, they both were. Charlotte was actually, surprisingly calm, considering that her heart was beating and her hands were sweating and she couldn’t tear her eyes away from this man in front of her that she NEVER EVER thought she would EVER be standing here with, feeling this way… Just 6 years ago, she wouldn’t have even kissed him on the cheek! “You look amazing,” he managed to say. She couldn’t speak. He looked… UNF. She just couldn’t. She tried to catch her breath, but he moved so close that she thought he might kiss her. Instead he smiled, giddy, and brushed his nose against hers. He kept his face very near her face and neck and probably was going to wind up sore from trying to be so close to her. He kept whispering things like, “I can’t believe this is really happening,” and “I love you so much.”

Words from the Parents...

Instead of “readings,” they’d asked their parents for tiny speeches of advice. There were no poems or lyrics that were going to sum up what they felt. Better to bring this new adventure in with the most important people giving them the most sacred advice on their special day. 

Mr. Page said, “From the time Charlotte was a little girl, she always knew what she wanted and she never had trouble working hard to get it. So much, that by the time she was 6, I pretty much knew I could trust that she meant whatever she would say. So, whenever she said that you two were together, I honestly didn’t think twice about it. I’ve always wondered, will she make the right choice in a man, or a woman, if that would have been where she would have gone. I always thought if she came home one day with someone that I didn’t understand being for her, would I be able to accept it. Jasper… We’ve known you for years and I didn’t think you and my daughter were right for each other, but I knew her and I trusted her, so whenever I saw that it lasted and that it would come to this, I expected that. Because Charlotte might make mistakes, but she’s never made any that I’ve seen. So, you just better trust her. Trust her to do what she wants and needs to do for herself and trust in whatever she vows to do for you. She always knows exactly what she means. Always have.” Henry patted an emotional Jasper on the back. 

Recognition, advice, guidance from men was always a soft spot for him, having not had his dad around most of his life, and coming from his soon to be father-in-law, on a day already crammed with emotions, he just had to let a few happy tears fall. 

Mrs. Page said, “To add to that, make sure that she can trust you! One time when she was like 9 ot 10, my brother played what he felt like was a little prank on her. I don’t even remember what it was…” Charlotte almost interrupted to explain the prank, but didn’t want to derail her own wedding. “And whatever Coco did, Charlotte didn’t forgive him for YEARS and she still hasn’t forgotten. Look at her face.” They all laughed. “She’s slow to forgive and never forgets, so you need to be sure that you remain honest and trustworthy, Jasper. And Charlotte, you know I’ve been giving you bits and pieces all throughout this engagement, to the point that I don’t have much more to say but to just say this in summation: Be soft with him. He’s sensitive and you can be hard and cold sometimes. It won’t make you weak to be soft with him.” Charlotte furrowed her eyebrows. I AM soft with him. Him and him alone. Jasper squeezed her hand and pressed his cheek against her bridal frohawk. His mother simply offered congratulations and said, “Even I’ve learned a lot about her from you, so I can’t give advice, but I freely give my blessing and hope that she continues to love you as much as she’s shown me that she has.” 

Jasper was crying and wondering again why they didn’t have this happen at the reception, instead of as part of the wedding, but Henry had explained to him before - the WEDDING is supposed to be an emotional event. The reception is supposed to be a party with photo ops. Besides, only person qualified to give a speech at you two’s reception is ME.” 

Jack Leigh took the microphone from Pansy… not aggressively or anything, just eagerly. She stood, somewhat uncomfortably next to him as he announced, “Some of you probably don’t know me, but I am Jasper’s bio-dad. We didn’t really have a long history together, but what interactions we did have were definitely among the most significant ones in my life. I wasn’t the kind of father that Jasper needed and wasn’t the kind of husband his mom needed. So, my advice today would be - always put this relationship first. When you’re married, when you’ve decided in your heart that this is the one, nothing should be more important to you than your wife and your family. Whenever we met, I was SO PROUD that you had done so well. I was always worried that I would’ve screwed you up so bad that you’d hate me and not even believe in love, or worst - that you’d turn out like me. You managed to be a good kid, find a great woman and be smart enough to learn to love her and know her before making a huge decision. And you two just… work. So, my advice is to keep trusting and believing in yourself. You’ll do right by her and by this marriage. Because, whatever is inside of you has made you that kind of man.”

Henry preemptively handed Jasper a cloth handkerchief, which he sobbed into, with Charlotte rubbing his belly, affectionately and soothing him with her voice. It wasn’t until Uncle Roscoe yelled out, “Let it out, Lil’ Nephew! Big Dogs cry too!” And everyone, including Jasper started laughing. Things became a little less tense and the rest of the ceremony carried on beautifully. Uncle Rox was the man! Jasper reminded himself.

Reciting of Vows

Since Henry had the dogs, Piper held on to Charlotte’s affirmation journal for her and Fisher has Jasper’s. Henry had decided that it was better for them to stand behind and a little off to the side and extend their arms forward with the books, as to not get in between the officiant and the couple, and not to block too much the couple from the guests, but also to not have Charlotte and Jasper release hands to hold books. Just as well, he encouraged them to try to memorize the vows, but knew that Charlotte, while she might be able to memorize it all word for word, would feel more comfortable with having them there. But, she had already talked to both of them and instead of them awkwardly holding them for them to be read, both Piper and Fisher simply held the books and stood beside them, with them open. If they had a pause or something, they could just whisper the next line. Henry was salty that he hadn’t thought of that, but Charlotte WAS the brains of that operation. 

Jasper spoke, “Charlotte, whenever I first fell in love with you, I knew that I wasn’t what you would have looked for in a man, but I was up to that challenge, because I knew that you were worth more than any person that I would ever know or meet in my life. And I’m still up to that challenge, as you continue to evolve and grow into a greater person, I will continue to push myself to be worthy of being at your side. I will be strong for you, even though I know that you’re strong enough. I will be brave for you, even though I know that you’re brave enough. I will be every definition of a man that you could ever possibly dream of and if I can’t, I’ll determine that I just have to work harder. You’ll never be alone, as long as I’m alive and you’ll never be without as long as I have breath in me. I don’t care what it takes. I’ve been determined to be what you want, need, and love, and I will never stop being and doing that, as long as I live and as long as we’re together.”

Charlotte’s face twisted in emotion and Piper quickly tucked the journal and clapped her hands twice. Schwoz wiped at Charlotte’s eye corners to catch the tears in the tear cloth, Henry fanned her to keep her from being too warm and Adanna passed a refresher rose water spray spritz to Piper, which she sprayed a couple of times on Charlotte’s face as Henry fanned, and Schwoz blotted. Charlotte nodded once and the three whispered, “Break!” and resumed their positions. The guests laughed a little at the proficiency and dedication, but Charlotte took a deep breath and motivated herself, “You’ve got this, Charlotte. You’re good.”

“You’re the best,” Jasper corrected her, with a teary smile. 

She smiled at him and nodded her head. “Jasper. Before us, I knew what I wanted and who I wanted to be - just like my dad said earlier -”

“Good improv,” Piper whispered and Charlotte just winked and continued.

“But, whenever you made your presence known in my life, I had to rethink my entire future. I wouldn’t just do that for some guy. I would only do that for a man that I knew that I could trust, love, and respect for the rest of my life. Neither of us is perfect, but we still manage to make it work out perfectly, and surprisingly and refreshingly, that’s never all on me. I’ve known a lot of people to get married and lose themselves in each other, or even become an unmarried couple and begin to live their lives revolving around the other person and a lot of times neglecting themselves and I was worried and scared that it might happen to me. But, you’ve remained my best friend and you’ve become my life partner. You motivate me to be more of myself and you inspire me to be a higher me… That’s so goofy, but it’s true. I just want to be able to reciprocate that determination and dedication that you show. Not to lose myself in you, but to continue to find myself, with you and for you to continue to find yourself with me, and you are the only person that I could ever imagine it working so perfectly with. The only person I would be willing to call myself “Mrs.” for. From this day on, that’s who I am.”

Jasper ugly cried and Fisher asked Piper, “Can we get one of those ummm…?” Piper clapped her hands twice and they fixed Jasper right up, too. She smiled at Fisher as they three said, “Break!”

Gift Presentation and Ring Exchange

Charlotte and Jasper gave each other their affirmation journals, which they passed back to Piper and Fisher, who put them away where they had kept the previous ones, before the vows recitals. Henry took that time to collect the rings from the dogs’ collars and pass them to Piper and Fisher, as he made a little announcement for the guests, “I know that this ceremony hasn’t been exactly what you’ve come to expect in a wedding…”

Roscoe, who was sitting by Ray and Cohort cheered, “It’s the best wedding I have ever seen!” He and Jasper pointed at each other with huge smiles and Ray rolled his eyes. 

“This guy is the worst, right?” He asked Cohort.

“This is my husband,” she said, annoyed. 

Ray chuckled and added, “The worst at being a bad guest, am I right?”

Jake put a hand on Ray’s leg and said, “Just… Shhh. Our Henry’s speaking!”

Henry continued, “And now, the bride would like to make a small gift presentation before the rings exchange.” Jasper furrowed his eyebrows in surprise. He thought that HE was the one who knew most about this ceremony, but apparently Henry and Charlotte had managed to keep something from him… New Henry and another frat boy brought in a fancy looking chest adorned in red and gold, and Henry opened it.

Charlotte said, “This is more like an extension of my vows, so you don’t feel a way about not getting me anything. I just wanted to make today extra special for you and take this time that I knew that I would have to declare in front of all of our loved ones stuff that they might not ever really get a chance to hear or see me profess again.” Jasper placed both hands over his heart and smiled. Charlotte was great at gift giving, whenever she made the time and took the effort to gift people. 

“First, there’s this,” she pulled out a trophy that looked enough like Jasper hitting a flex pose, but golden and he gasped in excitement. “This is because you’re very competitive, sometimes, even when there is no competition for you! And for this, there is none…” 

She handed it to him and he looked at it and practically screamed, “MOST PERFECT MAN FOR CHARLOTTE!” She laughed and he turned to show it off to everyone as she reached into the gift box again. 

By this time, Uncle Roscoe had gotten up and was taking photos. Jasper and his groomsmen were posing with and around the trophy like he’d really actually won something and Charlotte was tickled, because she knew that in Jasper’s mind, he really had. She cleared her throat and he passed his trophy to Fisher, “Don’t let anything happen to that.”

“We’re at your wedding. What could happen?” Fisher wondered.

Charlotte said, “This next gift is something that I had made for you to represent who you are to me and let you show that off to everyone else.” She pulled his crown from behind her back and he jumped up and down and fanned himself, then reached for it with gimme hands. Henry had forgotten how childlike and full of excitement that Jasp could be whenever he had something great in front of him, but Charlotte seemed to be super warm and soft to his less than classy reactions. Well, she knew who she was marrying, Henry guessed. It would have been silly for them to expect him to act any other way. 

“I am the KING!” Jasper declared.

“We really should’ve gotten this presented to him in the dressing rooms and let it be a story instead of part of the ceremony,” Piper told Henry.”

“Naw. It’s his special day and Char wants to really make him feel it.” Piper shrugged her shoulders.

“I guess.”

Charlotte told the guests, “In case any of you are wondering, Jasper buys and makes me really awesome gifts all the time, and I don’t usually get to have a huge show of affection for him, regularly…”

“Don’t worry about them,” Jasper said and waved a hand at the guests, “No offense,” he tacked on. She pulled out something small and red and he didn’t know what it was, but his spirits were so high, it wouldn’t have mattered what it was, because nothing could change his energy right now.

“This is an exact replica of my heart that I made with the project that I’ve been working on in my free time, for those custom made 3D printing organs? I scanned my own heart, made this replica, and then jazzed it up a little with some red crystals and a “tattoo” of your name… Because my heart is yours. You’re definitely king of that…” 

He stood corrected. His energy COULD change. He was in a dangerous state of euphoria. An indescribable overwhelming joy that rendered him motionless and speechless. She extended her hands and he saw the scripted “Jasper” on the center of what was basically her heart… He accepted it with shaky hands and moved in to kiss her. 

Henry tiny shreaked and said, “It’s not time for that! RINGS!” He called out. 

Piper collected the gifts back into the box and told Fisher, “You’re responsible for these now.” He grabbed a frat member and repeated the same thing to him. 

The ring exchange was pretty uneventful, considering, but whenever Jasper was told he could kiss the bride, he let it all out. It became uncomfortable after a while, with their friends and family all looking away awkwardly, like her parents and his mom, or morbidly obligated to stare, like Ray and Jake. Uncle Roscoe was taking photos and cheering, “THAT’S WHAT I’M TALKIN’ BOUT LIL’ NEPHEW! TRIED TO TELL Y’ALL!” 

Recessional

A crowned Jasper happily walked his new wife back down the aisle, to the chorus of his friends barking and this time, others joined in, Henry followed with the dogs, eager to get out to use the bathroom, Schwoz followed behind Coogie and Snek and Piper shook her head and took Fisher’s arm. “You didn’t keep ANY of them in proper order,” she said. “And where is the gift chest?” 

“Shhhh… This is a celebration, Old Henry’s sister,” Fisher said. They walked out with fake smiles plastered on. Then, he immediately rushed to go find the gift chest. Big Dog would MURDER him if he lost that thing!

The Reception

Henry paid for a wedding cake, because Charlotte’s Charlotte cake could simply be her bride’s cake and Jasper’s groom cake was a realistic looking lion, because both he and the wedding “are Leos,” but there was no way that Henry’s first wedding was not going to have a memorable cake whenever a lot of people ONLY accepted wedding invitations FOR the cake. So, Jasper had his, Charlotte had her Charlotte cake, and Henry ordered a multiple tier wedding cake with red, orange, and yellow edible flowers and similarly colored fruit cut and shaped like flowers or hearts. “I am so good at this!” he told himself.

They did all of that reception stuff - the garter, the bouquet and such. Henry was finally ready to relax, while Jasper and Char looked ready to… take on the world! “Good for them,” he said to himself.

“Yeah, they make it seem possible for everybody, right?” He heard a voice that he had come to recognize as “New Henry’s” voice say. He turned around and the guy smiled and asked, “You gonna get some cake?” Henry looked down to see that he was just standing there holding the cake cutter and he set it down. New Henry said, “This was good. Charlotte gave me a taste of her bridal cake and it was delicious! Gourmet, even. But nothing beats a well done wedding cake. That’s basically what I come to weddings for.”

“EXACTLY!” Henry finally found his voice. “Can you believe that Jasper wanted me to cover a table in Charlotte cakes and have THOSE be the “wedding cake?”

“I know Big Brother Big Dog, so yes. I can believe that he wanted that.” He laughed. “Good thing you changed his mind. This is one of the best wedding cakes I’ve ever tasted. I’m kinda an expert too. My mom made wedding cakes to pay for my college.”

“Really? Does she still make them, because I don’t really have an official cake person for my business references.”

“Yeah, she does. I’ll give her your number,” New Henry said. Henry nodded, excitedly and pulled out his phone. “Also, I’ll take it too… If… You want to ever… I mean, I know we’ve only hung out doing the wedding stuff and only know each other through Jasper and Charlotte, but…”

Henry’s eyes were wide and he wondered, Is this super hot dude hitting on me right now??? Because, he had not been on a date or anything in ages and even whenever he used to, it was exclusively with girls/women, but he had never really thought about a guy before and… who knows? Maybe he was into that…

“It’s okay if you don’t!” New Henry said, seeing his hesitation.

“It’s not that. I just didn’t know if you wanted to hang out as bros or if you were like… wanting to… hang out…” Henry bit his lip nervously.

“Are you interested in hanging out with a guy?”

“I’ve just realized that I’m not against it. Never really came up before. I mean, outside of Jasper, I hadn’t ever really thought of dudes in that way. But, you’re… like super attractive and if that IS what you meant, yes. And also, if you just wanted to hang out as bros, yes too. I never get to hang out. I need a life.” Henry laughed uncomfortably. 

“Cool…” New Henry smiled and asked, “You wanna dance?”

“Yes. Yes, I do!” Henry practically cheered. 

“Okay. Also… My name is Craig… You… know that, right?”

“Of course I do,” Henry said.

“Because I just told you?”

“Correct!” 

.

Jasper wore his crown for the rest of the night and Charlotte felt like he was never going to take the thing off. He kept calling her Mrs. Dunlop, then saying, “Excuse me, Mrs. JASPER Dunlop,” to which she’d think, Excuse me, Mrs. Charlotte Dunlop! But, she let him have these moments of joy. They had about a week to get settled into married life, wouldn’t be able to have a honeymoon yet, and both would have a TON of work whenever they got back to the lab and the firm. So, for now, it was just all that they could do - enjoy each other for what they were and what they had just become, together. 

#A Chasper Fic #chasper #henry danger #hd fanfic #Nesha HD Fics

[childofthenight2035]

Serendipity (it’s written in the stars)

A/N: Hi I’m back this is a thing i wrote requested by @tydontstop​ hope you like it (it might be horrible but thats me) check out my masterlist some time

Pairing: Ten x g!Reader

Summary/Prompt: You’re tired of the pressure from your mother to find a date for a party. When you storm away, you don’t expect to actually find one.

Genre: Fluff, Angst, Suggestive, Escort!au

Word Count: 26.1k

Warnings: Swearing, Depression themes, Suggestive?

Have fun.

--

“Ma, we are not going through this again.” You walked into the kitchen, a stew bubbling on the stove. You washed out a spoon and began mixing it, trying to let the salt and the spices distribute evenly. “I couldn’t care less about it.” The door slammed open. She had clearly followed you in, and wasn’t happy that you had walked away from her.

“We are going through this, and you’re going to listen,” she said sternly, snatching the spoon from you (‘the stew,’ you protested) and forcing you to look at her. “How can you not even care about your brother’s product launch?” You watched helplessly as two drops of stew dripped down the spoon and landed on the tiled floor.

“I hardly even know anything about the product, except that it’s a…phone? It’s a phone, right?” you raised your voice, intending for your brother Changmin, who was seated in the dining room, to hear.

“Yeah!” he called back.

“Ma, I’ve never paid any attention to what he’s told me,” you explained again, as patiently as you could. “What earthly use could my presence serve?”

“What use?” she exclaimed, waving her hands in exasperation. A drop of stew landed on her shirt and she wrinkled her nose, finally setting the damn thing down. You scooped it up and began stirring again. “How can a member of our family be absent for such an important event in our establishment?”

You sighed, pushing your haywire hair away from your face. Since when am I a member of this family? “I’ve never been part of your conferences, Ma. Why does it matter that I show up for this one?”

“Those are different! Those aren’t important!” She fidgeted uncomfortably, first placing her hands on the granite kitchen counter, then on her hips, then crossing her arms. “This is a major achievement.”

“She’s trying to set you up with one of her friends’ sons,” your brother informed you loudly from the room next door.

“Changmin!” she exclaimed.

You stared at your mother disappointedly. “So that’s what this is about, huh?” She looked only slightly guilty. “Is this your idea of getting me a marriage proposal?”

“Well, what’s wrong in that?” she tried to defend herself. “You don’t have anyone to take with you as a date, so why not one of them? There’s no harm in at least meeting them.”

“Ma, I told you I’m not interested in going,” you said firmly. “And even if I was going, it wouldn’t be with any douchebag you recommend.”

“They’re all very nice young men,” she claimed, indignant. “Don’t insult them before you meet them.”

“I have a friend you might be interested in,” your brother piped up, entering the kitchen and placing his brand new phone gingerly on the island. You whirled around in fury.

“Et tu, Min-ah?”

“Don’t call me that,” he growled.

“Then stay out of my business,” you retorted, equally fierce. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw your mother open her mouth and you held your free hand up. “Can all of you just shut up? I’ve made my decision.” You turned back to the task at hand.

A sharp exhale sounded in the kitchen. You already knew what was going to—

“Such an odd child, you are!” she said, fake grief evident in her tone. She was preparing herself to launch into her ‘black sheep of the family’ speech that you had heard only too often. “Great-grandfather a businessman, both grandparents businesspeople, both parents in the business, every uncle and aunt and cousin someway or other part of industry, your own brother in a successful position. And you? Studying how to read and write! Of all things, literature? I can’t imagine what possible use you have with getting that degree. You used to enjoy playing CEO with your brother when you were younger; your father’s always taught you to calculate the profits and losses from the figures in the office; I don’t know what happened to you. Such a disgrace! People are already asking when you’ll be joining the business, what on earth do I tell them?”

“You can be my secretary,” Changmin offered.

“You wish, Min-ah.”

“I told you not to call me that.”

“Then shove off. Ma,” you turned away from him, “you just tell them that I won’t be joining. It’s not really that difficult.”

“Not that difficult?!” She laid a hand over her chest. “What will people say when they hear that you’ve been learning English, oh I don’t know…”

You had heard enough. Dropping the spoon and letting it sink into the stew, you turned and abruptly left the kitchen, through the front door, slamming it behind you, thrust into the cool night air. You had only one place in mind. The bridge.

You walked along the dark street, lit only by weak lampposts that cast a circle of orange beams onto the road. The night was quiet, save for a few vehicles every now and then. You supposed most people were sleeping peacefully after a shitty Monday at work. Good for them. You wished you could knock yourself out like that.

A gust of cold wind stung your nose and ears, and you brought your icy hands up to your face, breathing on them and rubbing at your ears. Which didn’t help much. You had burst out of the house too angry and irritated that you forgot a jacket. Bitterly regretting that now, you pressed forward, knowing that the bridge would calm you. Cursing at every bit of moving air that came your way, you finally reached the long beam bridge that spanned over a kilometre across the river. The bridge was equipped on both sides with footpaths and the tarred road in between. You stepped onto it, making your way to the middle of the bridge. There were few people out at this time of night, mostly loners or couples. The traffic on the bridge was higher than down your own road, probably because it was a highway that curved out of sight before you reached your house.

You stared out at the river, hands shoved in your pockets. The wind was stronger up here, but suddenly, you didn’t seem to mind. The lights illuminating the bridge and the headlights of the cars shed some of its glow onto the water. Farther out on the horizon, the moon’s reflection shimmered on the ripples.

The scene was serene and calm, but you were anything but. Without even knowing it, too occupied in fuming internally at your mother and brother, you stepped up on the cement ledge from which the metal railing emerged, so you could prop your arms up on the railing, ignoring the sting of the cold. You were gripping the rail so tightly that your knuckles turned pale. You breathed deeply, closing your eyes and allowed the scene to seep into you. When you opened them again, you felt much better.

For the next few minutes, you gazed out at the water. That is, until you felt someone’s eyes on you. You slowly tilted your head to the side.

A young man, casually dressed, cap over his head and hands in his jacket pockets, was staring intently at you, expression fearful. His eyes darted everywhere—to your hands, to your feet, to your face. He dropped his gaze hastily, but you weren’t about to let that go.

“Can I help you?” you asked in a normal voice that sounded quite unnaturally loud in the now still air. He flinched, and took a step back, shaking his head.

“Oh…” He adjusted his cap (a nervous gesture, you noticed). “I…I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—“ He swallowed. “You just…looked like you were going to jump, so…”

His words surprised you. Glancing down at your clenched hands and your feet on the ledge. Your expression must have been troubled, too. He was right—it did look like you were going to jump. You carefully stepped down from the cement and released your hold on the railing. He visibly relaxed.

“I wasn’t—“ your voice came out rough and thick. Clearing your throat, you tried again. “I wasn’t going to jump. I just…had a lot on my mind. I guess.”

“Oh. Okay.” He tugged at his cap again. “I was just worried.” Then, as an afterthought, he added, “If I turn around now, you still wouldn’t jump, right? I can trust you?”

You’ve never had someone so concerned about your mental health like this before, other than some fleeting ‘are you okay’s when you seemed down in class. Most of the people you knew would have just let you jump and walk away as if they had seen nothing. Why is he so worried about me?

All you had to do was say ‘yes, I promise I won’t jump’, but instead you replied, “Why would you care?”

He tilted his head, looking confused. His eyes narrowed slightly. “Why wouldn’t I?” The corner of his mouth curved in a funny yet sad little smile. “There’s nothing you can’t solve.”

You scoffed, already thinking that this person was about to go into a typical ‘life is worth living’ monologue. You really didn’t want to hear it. “I wish.”

“No, I’m serious.” He took off his cap, shook out his hair so it fell back in place and then put it back on. You guessed it was a little quirk of his. “Even if it’s waiting until everyone forgets it, or even running away, there’s a solution.” He gazed down fearfully at the water. “After today, I should be the one jumping, but as you can clearly see, I’m not.”

You tried your best to stay aloof, to seem like you weren’t slowly becoming invested in this conversation; half of you wanted him to leave you alone, but the other half wanted you to ask. So you did. “Why? What happened?”

He seemed more than willing to tell you. “I lost my job today. I’m not even completely sure why. A few of us got fired, it might have something to do with the merger. I don’t know.” He shrugged. “If I don’t find another one, I’m going broke by the end of the week.”

Ouch. That must have been a blow. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

He waved the sentiment away. “Nah. Don’t be. The world hasn’t ended. I’ll wake up tomorrow and find a way.” He turned to you, leaning an elbow on the railing. “Are you okay, though?”

Is he not going to let me go until I tell him exactly what’s wrong with my life? I don’t think so. You twitched uncomfortably. “I’m okay. Just. Family issues. Fighting and stuff.”

He winced and nodded sympathetically. “That sucks. Those are the worst.” He let out a breathy chuckle as if he’d just remembered something funny. “Incredible how much we feel like slamming the people we love the most into a wall.”

He had described your feelings perfectly. “Exactly!”

“You want to talk about it?” He shifted his cap again and you fought the urge to smile, proud at having noticed it. “Might make you feel better.”

“Maybe I’ll pass.” You had no intention of telling a random passer-by your life story.

He held up his hands. “As you wish. But I’m just a nameless stranger; it would be just like shouting into the void.”

You spared him a small smile. “I’d really rather not.”

It was getting late. You realized gradually that the lights in the distance were shutting off one by one and that the traffic had decreased behind the two of you. You checked your watch. It was a little after ten  and not at all a reasonable time for you to be out. “I’d better leave, it’s late.” A sharp gust of wind blew. Without the conversation to distract you, you shivered. He noticed.

“No wonder you’re cold, you came outside wearing just that?” You glanced down at yourself, only now aware that you were wearing the almost sheer silky night shirt you reserved for home. At least you weren’t wearing the matching pants. Without them, it looked like any casual shirt. He didn’t seem to understand it was a pyjama shirt, or you would have been more embarrassed than you were.

“I—forgot. To bring my jacket.”

“Well, shit, here,” he said, already shrugging his own jacket off his shoulders. “Borrow mine.”

You shook your head, alarmed and brought your hand up to signify to him that he didn’t need to take it off. “No! It’s okay. I mean—my house isn’t, like, too far from here.”

He paused, his jacket dangling off one sleeve. “I could walk you home, then. It is pretty late.”

You denied him again. “It’s honestly okay. I’m sure I can find my own way home.”

He still looked a little worried, but relented. “Suit yourself.”

You tapped the railing uncertainly and then took a step away. “Yeah. So. Um, good night? I guess.” He nodded, smiling gently and returned the parting message. You stuffed your hands in your pockets as best you could without trying to look like you were cold. You turned away from him and jogged down your side of the bridge back to land. You paused, briefly, debating whether to turn and look back at him? but you decided against it. That would be weird. He’s interesting, but that’s it. That’s all he is—a subject to analyse from a literature major’s point of view.

You let yourself in through the gate quietly, smiling innocently at the disgruntled security guard, viewing with satisfaction that the upstairs lights were off. So your mother had apparently gone to bed. Early birds, all of them. Exactly the opposite of you. As you crunched your way over the fallen leaves up the pathway to the door, you saw that the carnations planted by the broken cement tiles were close to drying up. You made a mental note to fix that issue the next day.

You tried the door and found it open. You tried to close it (keyword: tried) gently behind you, wincing when it creaked. A sudden bark from the hallway made the hairs stand up on the back of your neck. You placed a hand over your heart.

“Jesus, Lexi, why do you do that?” Your fingers found the light switch and flicked it on. Light flooded the room. You blinked, adjusting to the brightness. A howl echoed and your husky puppy ran delightedly over to you. You wondered how much she must have whined when you left the house. You knelt. “Hey, girl.” She barked in response. “Shh. Don’t wake the house up, silly. Gave everyone a hard time?” You ran your fingers through the light grey fur behind her ears, a spot that usually made her obedient enough.

Changmin’s footsteps didn’t even startle you anymore. You stood up, a tired but enthusiastic Lexi padding around your feet.

“Go to sleep now, girl.” You nudged her in the direction of the bundle of blankets that she called her bed. Knowing better than to argue, she settled in them, placing her head on her front paws.

“The hell were you?”

“The hell you care?” And for good measure, “Min-ah.”

He swatted at you as you ducked past him to get to your bedroom.

“I went to get some fresh air,” you muttered darkly, still feeling obliged to answer him. “Get out of this stupid house.”

You grasped the handle of your room and turned it, wanting to disappear into the one space that you could be free. He pushed against the sleek wood, making sure you didn’t close it on him.

“Hey, I’m sorry I said all that when Ma cornered you.” He winced apologetically. “I’m not going to try to set you up with any of those robots. And I don’t blame you for not choosing business. When I said you could be my secretary, I wasn’t implying that you were less than me or anything, it was just a—“

You cut him off. “I know, Min.” He relaxed, seeming to know you meant it.

“Don’t, you know, get discouraged by Ma, okay?” Something moving around his calves caused him to look down. Lexi was pushing to get inside your room. He held the door open wider so she could get through. Lexi bounded inside and leapt onto the bed. “Ma never reads your stuff. You write really well, yeah? I’ll back you up there.” You turned to your desk, pretending to organize the mess so he wouldn’t see the vast array of emotions flitting across your face. “Just come to the product launch, yeah? It…” he sighed, as if showing so much emotion drained him. “It would mean a lot to me if you did.”

When would you ever see your brother so sentimental again? You gave in. “Okay. I’ll come.”

His face broke into a smile. “Great. Yeah. Thanks. You don’t even have to go to the conference and press meeting. Heck, even I don’t want to be there. Just show up at the after-party. That’s enough.” You nodded in understanding. He stood there, hesitating a moment longer, and the atmosphere broke, awkwardness settling in. Changing his mind, he gestured to your room, his voice becoming professional and bossy again. “Clean your room, for fucks’ sake. You’re such a pig.”

There it was. Back to normal. You seized a pen and chucked it hard at him. “Get the hell out.”

He swiftly closed the door before the missile hit him, the sharp ‘ping’ of plastic against wood filling the room.

…

Lexi’s weight lay heavy on the bed as you shifted every now and then, unable to sleep. The events of the day kept replaying in your head. Numerous things that you wanted to tell your mother so badly. The words your brother had meant but didn’t say. And the stranger. You realized now that you hadn’t asked his name. You could still hear him. I’m just a nameless stranger; it would be just like shouting into the void.

You weren’t going to sleep anytime soon. You lifted the heavy covers off your legs, careful not to wake Lexi. You sat at your desk, flicking the lamp on. Opening your notebook and uncapping a pen, you doodled mindlessly, writing the words nameless stranger and messing with them until the words came to you.

nameless stranger

where did you come from? where will you go?

the water beneath your feet

and the lights over your head

the smile of an angel

and words left unsaid

shoulders carrying the weight of the world

and eyes too wise for their age

earth shaking thunder hidden in a voice

a soul to soothe the gods’ rage

your story is written in the stars

mine is somewhere there too

nameless stranger

where did you come from? where will you go?

I live today for you.

...

 You waited until your mother was safely out of the house, watching through your window as her expensive ass car pulled out of the driveway, before you came out of your room. You met your brother in the kitchen, where he was inhaling an apple, his other hand typing away frantically at his laptop. You didn’t announce your presence, you just stood there, watching him. He had always been like that. Like Ma. One eye always on the clock, always racing against the time.

“You’re going to choke and die,” you finally said. He didn’t even flinch.

“You’d like that, huh?” He answered with his mouth full.

“I would like it,” you agreed easily. “But I imagine your secretary wouldn’t.”

This time, just like you predicted, he choked on his bite of apple, coughing and gasping for air, eyes watering. You waited patiently for him to finish, an amused smile tugging at your lips.

“What the hell,” he protested weakly, whining at you. Pink tinged his cheeks. “Go away. Let me finish my work.”

“Gotcha.” You opened the fridge. “I also hope you get yourself some dessert, if an apple’s all your gonna eat now.”

He shut his laptop, sighing. “I have to leave.”

You saluted him. “Peace.”

You watched him shove the laptop into his backpack and sling it over his shoulder. Such a wonderful little businessman. True, you resented him when you were younger because he was the epitome of perfection and you were the one overshadowed. But you had long since put all of it behind you when you understood that your ambitions were elsewhere. But really, you couldn’t hate him. He worked so hard to get to where he was now and still people dared to say it was only because of inheritance.

You shook your head. Unfortunate.

…

After walking Lexi around a couple of blocks and then making it just in time for your afternoon class, you went to hide out in the public library, just in case your mother decided to return early. You loved the library. It was peace and quiet and books and you couldn’t imagine a better place to be. You always brought your notebook with you, penning down thoughts that randomly occur to you.

lost in a maze of books

stories old and new floating around

just out of reach

searching for a place to stay home

no sense of space or time

drowning in the weight of the past

times memory no longer serve

You frowned at the words before ripping the page and tossing in cleanly into the trash can. Sometimes the picture in your head didn’t turn out quite right.

Your eyes fell on the piece you wrote the previous night in a drowsy stupor. Again, triggered by the memory, your mind drifted to him. You wondered if he would be there today as well. Your hands only held a novel in name, your mind elsewhere. If anyone had been watching, they would have noticed that you had been stuck on the same page for over half an hour.

You woke up three hours later, your face buried in a copy of And the Mountains Echoed. Startled at the time, you hastily stood up, head spinning slightly at the sudden movement. Your eyelids were still heavy. Rubbing the sleep out of them, you left, bowing to the librarian as you passed her.

He’s not going to be there. I’m sure of it. He was only there yesterday because he wanted peace after he lost his job.

But what if he is there? Wouldn’t you like that?

No, I certainly wouldn’t. Why would I like that? I don’t even know his name.

You could ask his name tonight.

He’s not going to be there.

He might.

…Fine. I’m not going home just yet. I’m going to the bridge.

…

 He was already there. You denied that you felt any sort of joy from the sight.

He grinned at you. He was wearing the same jacket that he was yesterday, but no cap. “Ecstatic, huh? That I’m here?”

You scoffed. “You wish.” You stood next to him, staring at the water. The moon was half hidden by clouds. “I just like the view.”

You felt his gaze on you. “Something on your mind today?”

“Anything on yours?” you questioned.

He shrugged, turning around to face the traffic, planting his elbows on the railing. “I went to an interview today.”

“And?”

“Didn’t get it.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault.”

You remembered that you still didn’t know his name. “What’s your name? I forgot to ask.”

He cracked up. “You want my name? Okay. Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul.”

Your face fell. “Pardon?”

He couldn’t help his laughter. “It’s always the same reaction. I don’t blame you. Just call me Ten.”

“Ten?” He gave you a thumbs-up. “Why Ten?”

“Why not Ten?” he replied. “My friends gave me that name in high school.”

You sensed that he wasn’t quite willing to divulge the meaning of his nickname. Swiftly you changed the topic. “I think I’ve heard that before. Chittaphon. Oh. No,” you added, on second thought, “that’s something else. Chittagong.”

He looked confused. “What’s Chittagong?”

“It’s a movie,” you explained. “It’s also the name of a place.”

“Oh. Okay.” He fixed the fringe of his hair. You smiled to yourself.

The wind blew harder today than it did the previous night. It was already difficult to hear each other.

“What was your job?” you asked curiously, realizing you didn’t know.

“Oh, I didn’t mention?” he laughed at himself. “I’m a software engineer.”

“Damn. That’s tough.”

“No shit. I’m not telling you where I used to work, though.”

You recalled a line you had overheard your father telling a guest. “That has a lot of scope. You’ll find a job.”

He smacked his palm against the handrail suddenly. “I wish I’d had that interview today.”

“Wait, what?” You were thrown off by his statement. “You said you had one.”

“Well yeah, I went there but the secretary was rude as hell and so I…um. Might have said some things to her.”

“What did you say?”

“Uhh…” He scratched the back of his neck. “Don’t get me wrong here. I’m not, like, that guy, and besides, what I said wasn’t even all that bad.” He shook out his hair. You waited patiently. Seeing your earnest expression, he sighed. “I told her that her baby would be due early because it couldn’t stand being inside her.”

“That’s not so bad.”

He winced. “She wasn’t pregnant.”

You coughed, choking on your own spit. “Oh my gosh. Ouch.” You broke into choppy laughter.

“Yep. I got kicked out.” He stretched his arms. “Don’t think I’ll be welcome back there anytime soon.”

“Wait.” You just understood. “You got kicked out before the interview?”

He nodded. “Yep.”

“That’s not fair. What company was it?”

He wagged his finger at you. “No. I’m not naming names.”

“But—“

“Yo, drop it.” He ran his had through his hair, messing it up and then fixing it again. “It doesn’t matter.” He jerked his head towards you. “You here to let off steam?”

You shrugged nonchalantly. “I suppose so.”

“Want to talk about it?”

“Not really.” You pursed your lips. He chuckled at your expression as if he recognized it.

“Still the family, huh?”

“Yeah.” It all seemed so simple, conversation with him. It was as if he knew what you wanted, not to pry, not to press you for information you didn’t want to give. But why were you so intrigued by this stranger you had met just yesterday? Maybe it was because you only had a face and a name to assign it. You didn’t know where he came from. Was he from across the bridge? For all you knew, he was a merman or something and rose out of the water to keep you company at night. Hey, that’s a nice story idea . You smiled inwardly at the idea of the young man beside you frolicking through the river with a fishtail. You didn’t really believe in all those mythical creatures, but it was fun to imagine. You were already planning the outline of the story.

“You heading home now?” His voice brought you to reality.

You checked your watch. It was a little past nine. “Why? Do you have someplace to be now?”

“No.” He shoved his hands in his pockets. “I was just wondering if I could walk you home.”

“Is this because you still think I’m going to vault over this bridge?” you teased.

He flushed at your tone but remained stoic. “I’m not going to regret that. Even if I was wrong. And no,” he held up a hand to make his point clear, “I offered because I’m a gentleman. Also because I don’t go to your side of the bridge often.” The sentence sounded like it belonged in a story of two people falling in love, kept apart by the border that separated their countries. You relented.

“Okay.”

The two of you walked down the near empty street, quite a relief from the crowded highway. The air was crisp and you crunched over the leaves strewn on the road. Your companion kept his eyes on everything but the ground in front of him. Is the other side so drastically different? Why does he seem like he’s never seen trees and lampposts before?

“Um.” You cleared your throat a little. “This is where I…” You gestured to the thick gates that closed off your property. He stopped in his tracks and took in the thick iron bars and carved designs of the gate; then his eyes drifted to your house and the lawn, visible through the gaps. He opened his mouth as if to speak, but nothing came out.

“Damn,” he said at last. “That’s a nice ass house.” You couldn’t stop the laugh that escaped your lips. His jaw was still slack. “I guess life is better on this side of the bridge, huh?” You suddenly caught sight of movement in the security’s cabin and yanked him aside, away from the gate. He let out a sharp yelp as both of you crowded into the darkness behind the compound wall. You placed a finger on your lips. “What?” he mouthed.

You only shook your head and peered around the corner. You saw the security’s shadow at the gate; clearly he was checking to see what the sound was. You waited until his shadow had disappeared before speaking.

“The last thing I want is the security telling Ma that I showed up at the house with a boy,” you explained.

“Oh.” He gazed up at the tall compound wall. “So you’re rich?”

“No,” you replied. “My parents are. At the rate I’m going, I’ll be on the street by the end of the semester.”

He didn’t ask why and you didn’t offer any more information. “Well, I don’t dare to come any closer to the gate,” he said, glancing fearfully around the wall. “I don’t want my face on some hitlist.”

You smiled. “That’s true. Well then, I’ll get going. You should, too.”

He nodded, turning to leave, but quickly stopped. “Wait! What’s your name?”

You hesitated for a split second, biting your lip. “Y/N.”

“Will I see you tomorrow?”

“You’ll find out, won’t you?” You flipped your hair over your shoulder cheekily.

The grin was evident in his voice. “I guess I will.”

…

 “Where were you?” was the first thing you heard when you let yourself in the house. You groaned inwardly. It was too early for Ma to sleep and too late for you to only be arriving home. You wished for a distraction, but none came.

“Do you have an idea what time it is?” your mother demanded.

“You stayed up for me? Aw, how sweet,” you remarked sarcastically, heading to the kitchen to grab a snack.

“Why do you come home so late? Why not just stay out?” Ma was clearly pissed about it. You sensed that she wanted another shot at the product launch debate. You heard her follow you into the kitchen. You ignored her, choosing to stick your head in the fridge. Your hunt was successful. You emerged with a sandwich.

“Great idea, Ma, I’ll do that now.” Unwrapping the plastic off it, you strolled back to the living room. “Why do you care anyway?” You sat down on the sofa next to your brother who was still working on his computer. You picked up the remote but didn’t turn the television on.

“Do you see how disrespectful she is?” your mother shrieked, addressing Changmin now. He raised his eyes tiredly to her and then to you. “I’ve never had such trouble from you!”

“Don’t do that, Ma,” Changmin muttered lowly. “Don’t say stuff like that.”

“I don’t know where I went wrong with this girl,” she continued. “Why can’t you be like the other girls?”

Oh, she really pulled that card. Your fists clenched. You originally had no intention of retaliating, figuring that she would get bored and leave. But for some reason, you couldn’t do that. Energy surged through you and you slammed the remote down on the coffee table, startling both people in the room and the dog.

“Ma, just calm down,” Changmin said immediately. “Just let it go—“

“No, Min. Let her say it. She’s right.” You stared hard at your mother, rising to your feet. “I’ve never played by your rules. I was never the daughter you wanted. I know that. You wanted me to be like the other girls, huh?” You sneered. “Like who, Ma? You mean like Lisa? and Jennie? and Dahyun? You mean like them?” Your fingers itched to throw something. “When—when I was six, you wanted me to play tea party and house all by myself. But I didn’t want to. The four of us only had playdates back then at my house or at Jennie’s. Always. You know why? Because only we had brothers.” You saw Changmin close his laptop quietly. “We didn’t play tea party; we played with Barbie’s and Dragon Ball Z action figures. We snuck out of the house to play basketball down by the middle school. Jennie broke into her brother’s PlayStation and taught us video games. You wanted me to be like them, Ma? I was like them. But you’re right.” Your voice dropped, eyes pricking. “I’m not like them anymore.”

Your mother remained tight-lipped and your brother sympathetic. “I’m not like them anymore because they stopped fighting against…everyone. Do you know why? Because they gave up on life.” You shook your head, fighting back the tears that threatened to fall. “Dahyun didn’t end up in therapy because of depression caused by the flu; how stupid are you to believe that? She didn’t want to live—just like the rest of us. We’ve all thought it. She just took it further than we ever had the guts to. They aren’t…they’re not the girls I used to know, Ma. They’ve changed. They’re lifeless now. Is that what you want?” You let out a shaky breath and ran a hand through your hair.

“You’re right. I’ve never played by your rules. You gave me my  life, but that doesn’t mean I’m indebted to you. That was your choice. You gave me my life, and I’m going to do damn well what I please with it. I study what I want to, and I’m going to be what I want to be—a writer.”

Your mother seemed to have found her voice at the concept of you being that. “You think you can possibly make a living out of that nonsense?”

“How would you know?” A voice asked quietly. You glanced down at your brother as your mother did.

“What did you say?” she snapped.

He looked up into her face. “I asked you how you would know,” he repeated, voice much louder. “You’ve never read a word that she’s written. She wrote one page on broken love and brought half her class and her professor to tears. She’s written about me…about you; and she’s—she’s incredible at it. You have no right to judge when you’ve never even attempted to know who she is as a person. And I can tell you, no amount of money or…or business deals can make you feel the way she does through her writing.”

You stared at him, stunned. This emotion, you thought it was only a one-time thing. You never expected him to hold your back when Ma was this way. A tear escaped your eyes.

“Don’t worry, Ma,” you said, wavering in between as you tried to speak. “Even if I lose every penny I make, even if I end up on the streets, I won’t come to you for help. Even if I’m terrible at writing, I will be happy because it’s what I want to do.” You sighed, planting your hands on your hips, exhausted. “We have this fight almost every day; aren’t you sick of it? If this is about the product launch, then I’ve already promised Min I’d be there—it means something to him. You just want to show me off and possibly get me married to some rich son of a CEO I’ve never met. I’m going to the party, but I’m bringing someone that I chose to go with. Have I made myself absolutely clear?”

Shock. Disbelief. But not acceptance on her face. She stood there unable to say anything, unable to speak as both of her children turned on her for the first time. Her hand reached out to grasp the back of an armchair, to steady herself. And then she silently left.

Neither of us spoke until we heard the faint closing of the door on the upper floor.

Changmin exhaled. “Holy shit, where the fuck did all that come from?” He let himself be absorbed by the sofa cushions. “I think the last time I saw you give someone a piece of your mind was in middle school.” You winced at the memory, cheap lockers and hallways and cafeterias flashing in front of your eyes.

“I guess I just found some confidence today.” You sank down onto the sofa again.

“That’s good,” he commented. “You could really open up more often.”

“I could say the same about you.” You inched toward him and rested your head on his shoulder. Surprisingly, he let you. “Thanks. You know. For backing me up.”

“I said I would when it comes to your writing. But,” he teased, “I can’t do anything about Ma trying to find you a boyfriend. Speaking of which,” he sat up straight, your head nearly falling into the space between his butt and the sofa, and then twisted to face you, “you really found someone to go to the party with?”

“I—“ you were cut off by Lexi’s delighted howls. You watched, amused, as she bounded over to you. You extended your hand for her, but she stopped just short of you. And then cocked her head curiously, letting out a sharp bark. “What’s the matter, baby? Come here.” Your voice soothed her and she padded closer softly. She sniffed your legs, your hands and your jacket and took a step back. Another short bark of confusion.

“What’s up with her?” Changmin narrowed his eyes. “You use another perfume or something?”

“I did, actually. Ah. Maybe that’s it.” You reached out to pet her head but she ran away. “She’ll get used to it.”

“Whatever, so you actually found a date?” He pressed further. “Don’t lie; you know you could bring your girl friends or your classmates or something, right? It would be okay.”

“I’m not lying, I swear,” you protested. “I did find a date.”

He gave you a funny look, like, ‘I-know-you’re-lying-but-I’m-playing-along-and-watching-you-as-you-make-up-these-falsehoods-that-I-will-certainly-remember-and-remind-you-of-them-as-you-crash-and-burn’. “You sure? There’s the afterparty in three days, on Friday and the retreat over the weekend. You say this person will be there for all of it?”

“He will.”

“Hmm.” You could almost see the wheels turning in his head, shifting the gears to protective brother mode. “What does this person do?”

“He’s an engineer.”

“Uh-huh. Where does he work?”

Your mind ran a blank. “He—um, I forgot to ask. I was already so impressed by the word engineer.”

“Sure you were. What’s his name?”

Shit. What the heck was his name? “I—I can’t recall it.”

He crossed his arms, looking sceptical. “You don’t know his name?”

“He doesn’t go by his name!” you exclaimed hastily. “Because it’s long. He uses a nickname.” He raised an eyebrow. You slumped in defeat. “You don’t believe me, do you?”

He shook his head. “Nope. But whatever. Even if you come alone, I don’t mind. But,” he pointed at you, “you won’t have any immunity against Mark.”

The name fell into your ears and exploded. Mark? Mark Tuan? “That’s who Ma is setting me up with? Are you fucking kidding me?”

He patted your shoulder sympathetically. “Yeah. Good luck.” Grabbing his laptop, he heaved himself off the couch and headed inside to his room. Distantly you heard him say ‘Lexi, you sleep here tonight until she gets her shit together’. You fell back against the couch, laying down fully.

Fuck. I can’t believe this. Ma is setting me up with Mark Tuan? Of all people, Mark Tuan? That’s disgusting! I can’t be in a relationship with him! I grew up with him, for Christ’s sake! I see him how I’d see Minnie. Why would Ma even consider it? I can still see him running around this house with Jackson, trying to find me when we played hide-and-seek. No, no, no! What is happening! Did he agree to this? Are we both in the dark? Maybe it won’t be so bad if both of us say no to it. Wait, but why would Ma consider it if they didn’t agree? Does Mark like me that way? Fuck.

You sat up, rubbing your temples. Great, you just gave yourself a headache. Damn. Now I have to ask Ten if he’s willing to go to the party with me? It’s going to blow up in my face, I’m sure of it. Who wants to go to a party with someone they just met? I don’t even know if he’ll show up after he’s seen my house. Will he run away? You had no idea.

…

one day

years from now,

when they find out

they will ask me

.

they will ask me

but why didn’t you tell us?

.

and to assume

that they didn’t already know

is selfish of them

.

because when I tried to get help

when I tried to explain

they brushed it off

as not real

as typical for my age

.

they made me afraid

afraid to speak again

.

so I am reduced to crying in my room

where they cannot see me

where they cannot hear me

I am not alone but I am very lonely

.

they ask why I do not spend time

with them

I am afraid to

because I have much to hide

and one wrong move

will be the end of the game

I will lose

and I am very much afraid

of what will happen if I do.

…

 The next morning, you stepped into the kitchen to find—surprise, surprise—your brother actually eating a proper breakfast instead of just tossing something into his mouth and running out the door. You yawned, stomach rumbling. “Where’s Ma?”

He grinned into his cereal bowl. “Still shooketh.” You snorted. “I dunno where she is, but I—“ he glanced at the clock, “—have work to go to.” He crunched through the rest of his cereal and set the bowl in the sink just as you finished making your coffee.

“Wait, can you drop me off at campus?” you pleaded, making puppy eyes just to emphasize your point. “Pretty please. I have class in the morning.”

“That’s your own fault.” You pouted. He rolled his eyes. “Fine. I’m leaving in five minutes. Do your worst.” He grabbed his keys from the island. “I’m walking towards the door…” He made exaggerated movements with his limbs. “And now I’m in the dining room…” You gulped down your coffee as quick as you could, listening to your nemesis announcing that he was at the front door. Setting your mug in the sink, you seized your backpack and dashed through the house, catching him just as he opened his car door.

…

 You didn’t see your mother all day. And you didn’t really want to. So that night, when you slipped out of the house, you felt no guilt whatsoever about it. The only thing that was clawing at your insides was the anxiety of having to ask Ten if he would be your date—if he was even there.

You got to the bridge. The night was warmer today, when just yesterday the wind had bitten your nose off. Climate issues were real. There were hardly any people around. Maybe he would only be invoked if you stood in the middle. That sounded cool, but kind of silly. You really had to write that merman story one day.

But then you were in the middle of the bridge. And no one was there. Some passers-by. But no familiar faces. You were disappointed, but had no intention of admitting that you came to see him. So, albeit with a sinking heart, you turned to gaze out at the water. Maybe he wasn’t a merman after all. Maybe he was like a spirit of the night or something of the sort. Ooh, maybe there was some conflict in the skies that your elusive companion had to interfere in. Okay, now you were just making things up. What could you do? Your mind was quite imaginative.

“Miss me?”

A voice you had grown to anticipate broke you out of your thoughts. You swivelled around, a smile on your face that you quickly hid. You were too late, though. He caught sight of your glee before you could mask it with your poise.

“No, I just came out here like I usually do.” You wanted to wipe that smug look off his face. “Admit it, you’re the one happy to see me.”

“I am,” he answered easily. “I find you intriguing.”

Honestly, what? He’s happy to see me?

“Did you think I’d run away?” he asked, hoisting himself onto the ledge. You sighed in defeat, giving up your pretention.

“Honestly? Yes.” You watched warily as he leaned far over the railing. “I thought you might have been intimidated by my family’s property.”

“Well, I won’t deny that,” he said, dropping back onto the footpath. “But the reason I stayed isn’t that. Because I don’t see an heiress standing successor to the throne when I look at you. All I see when I stand here is a girl who has problems. A  girl who wants to be free from whatever’s tying her down, to be distracted. So here I am,” he spread his arms out and made jazz hands, “a distraction.” You didn’t know what to say for a solid minute. The awkwardness fell in right after he ended his sentence. He folded up his jazz hands and stared out at the water again, coughing. “Also you did imply you wouldn’t be inheriting your parents’ wealth. So yeah, I’m not after your money.”

“Um. Well, thanks. I guess.” You brushed your hair away from your face. “I’m relieved? Anyway, how’s the job front?” The topic changed back to him.

He took off his cap to adjust his hair. You noticed he wasn’t wearing his jacket. He must have thought it too warm a night. “Got turned down twice today.” He shrugged. “I think. I mean, they say ‘thank you for applying we’ll let you know’ but from their faces I don’t think they liked the look of me. Ah well, can’t blame them,” he glanced at his attire. “I look like a homeless person. Whatever.”

There followed a lull in the conversation and you figured it was time to ask him what you had come out here in the first place to ask. But why were you so nervous? This was just supposed to be a professional matter. Just business. He wasn’t your crush or anything. So just fucking ask!

“Hey.” You heard your voice say. No backing out now. “I was just wondering…would you, um, be…open to coming to a party? With me? On Friday?”

His eyebrows disappeared into his hair. He clearly wasn’t expecting that. “Are—are you asking me out on a date?” He seemed astounded. “We literally met three days ago. Am I that amazing?”

You wanted to strangle the cocky bastard, but no. You needed him. “Not exactly a date date,” you tried to explain. “It’s this thing I have to go to, and everyone expects me to bring someone as a date. But it’s okay if you don’t want to! I was…just asking…” you trailed off uncertainly. Where did your words go?

“Look,” he began in a tone that already told you he was going to decline. Your stomach clenched. “You’re gorgeous (and rich but we’re not going into that). I’m not going to believe it for a minute that there aren’t people lining up to meet you. Why settle for me? You have other options for sure.”

You thought you could detect a trace of insecurity and bitterness in his voice. “I didn’t…I didn’t say that I had no other option. Just—you’re my best option.”

His lips parted in disbelief. “Wow. That’s probably the nicest thing anyone has said to me this month. Anyone tell you you’re a smooth talker?” You flushed, shaking your head. “I’m flattered. I really am. And honestly I’d love to, but the thing is, I have an interview that day…when exactly is the party?”

He was going to see if he could do both—bomb the interview and crash a party. No. “I’m not asking as a favour!” you blurted out. He tilted his head in confusion. “I’ll pay you.”

A hush fell over the two of you. Strictly professional, you thought. Business means you pay.

“So let me get this straight.” He wiggled his index finger around as if he was calculating something. “You’re saying you’ll pay me to take me to a party?”

“Yes.”

“Huh. How much are we talking?”

“You can decide.”

“Whoa!” he exclaimed, holding his hands up. “Seriously?”

“Within reason,” you added quickly.

“So…fifty thousand?” Inwardly you relaxed.

“Done.”

“What?!” he yelled, the sound nearly echoing in the mostly silent sky, startling a couple who was walking by on the other footpath. “You’re joking!”

“I’m not. I mean it.”

“So you’re like…my sugar dad—mommy now?”

You wrinkled your nose. “Gross. This is a business deal. Business means you pay.” He gestured wildly as if saying ‘but still!’. “Does that mean you’re willing to come?”

“Sure. Yeah. Course I will.”

“It’s a formal event,” you explained. “Black tie. And then there’s a retreat over the weekend.”

He looked uncertain. “I’m not sure I have anything that classifies as formal.”

You assumed as much and had made some calls. “You know Havenstock?”

“That posh suit place downtown? Yeah.”

“Go there tomorrow morning. Don’t worry about anything, yeah?”

His eyes were wide. “Holy shit, you are my sugar mommy.”

“Ew, quit saying that! If anything, you’re the one doing me a favour.”

“Alright.” He smoothed the front of his shirt, already imagining what it would be like to wear a proper suit. He stuck his chin in the air. “I can act posh.”

You laughed, tugging his chin down. “And I have to go home.” It was eleven forty-five. You were super late.

“Oh!” he said enthusiastically. “I’ll walk you there.”

…

 Night had fallen so thickly you could barely see where you were going once you had reached your house. Ten made a motion towards the gate, but you pulled him back, your heads accidentally bumping. You giggled.

“I can’t go in through the gate at this hour! Are you insane?” You whispered. “Nine o’clock was one thing, but midnight is another!”

“But then how will you get inside?” He kept his voice down, too.

“Follow me.” You gestured for him to follow you. Lodged in the back wall, hidden by some hydrangea bushes was an opening near the ground, sort of like a cat-flap in a door, but bigger than that. You had no clue how it got there, but you assumed it had been some kind of drainage path.

“That’s so cool,” he remarked, impressed. “And no one knows about this? That’s awesome.”

“Come on in. Step inside the house for a bit.”

He recoiled, horrified. “What? I found out your name yesterday and you’re already inviting me inside your parents’ house?”

You seized his arm to keep him from running away. “You won’t see them. I just thought you’d like to meet Lexi.”

His expression didn’t change in the slightest, even as you crawled through the gap and he followed. Another set of bushes covered the hole from the inside. “Who the heck is Lexi?”

You brought him inside. Your house was quiet and dark except for the light you always kept on in the dining room, in case someone needed a midnight drink. You slowly opened the back door that was connected to the extended kitchen, wincing whenever it creaked. But at last, the door was open and both of you were inside. The kitchen light flicked on.

Both of you flinched, caught unawares and moved as far away from the light as you could. Your gaze rested on the figure in the doorway. Changmin crossed his arms, looking at both of you in utter disapproval.

You gulped.

“Are you actually serious, Y/N?” he growled, still keeping his voice low.

Oh, boy, were you in trouble. He never used your name if he could help it.

“I didn’t think you were awake.”

“You’re bringing boys home now?” He facepalmed. “You have any clue what would happen if Ma found out? Dimwit.”

“He’s not! I didn't bring him home, I…” You sighed. “I just wanted him to meet Lexi.”

“And who is this he?” Changmin’s sharp analytical eyes rested on Ten.

“He’s my date for the party.” You saw Ten standing straighter.

“Oh, so you weren’t lying.” Your brother ran his gaze up and down. He stuck out a hand. “Changmin.”

Ten reciprocated, firmly shaking it. “Chittaphon.”

“I’m sorry?”

He cracked a smile. “I go by Ten.”

“Ten? Like, the number?”

“Yeah.”

“Hm.” You could tell that your brother was recalling everything you said about him the previous night. “How do you two know each other?”

Shit. You didn’t know how to answer that, but luckily for you, a bark resounded in the living room. The Siberian husky ambled tiredly into the kitchen, woken up by all the noise. Ten’s face lit up.

“Ten,” you said, relishing the smile on his face, “meet Lexi.”

He knelt down, almost sitting on the floor, delight unmasked. “Hi Lexi.” His voice was so gentle that it hurt your heart. Lexi paused, confused by this new addition. She avoided him and came to you, but stopped, just like she had the previous night. She sniffed you and barked. And then she sniffed him and barked in the same way. And then it dawned on you. It hadn’t been my perfume! Lexi smelled him!

“He’s a friend, Lexi, it’s okay,” you murmured, not wanting to meet your brother’s gaze. As if in confirmation, she licked Ten’s palm and allowed him to pet her, then stumbled out of his grip and barrelled into your legs with no hesitation. “Oof! You’re heavy, girl.”

As she bounced back to Ten, loving the newfound attention, you accidentally made eye contact with Changmin, just as he made the connection. He flashed you a look of horror, absolutely scandalized and you held your hands up. He pointed at Ten, then at the door, then at you and drew a line across his throat. The message was fairly clear.

“Lexi, that’s enough, girl, let the man go,” he chided, voice gentle but expression hard.

“Such a little hoe,” you teased. “Already drooling over him, huh? He has to go back home, okay, girl? We can see him some other time.” You managed to pry her off him. Ten stood up, bowing to your brother.

“Good night, Changmin-ssi,” he greeted, ever so polite. “Bye, Lexi.”

“I’ll walk you out,” you offered.

…

“What did he mean, you weren’t lying?” Ten questioned you as you snuck him back to the opening in the wall.

Ouch. “I kind of told him yesterday that I had a date to bring.”

“Wait, before asking me?” He knelt at the bush. “What if I said no?”

“I’d go alone. Or maybe I wouldn’t go.”

He nodded, deep in thought. “Where are your parents?”

“Dad’s away on a business trip. Ma,” you gestured to the house, “is probably sleeping.”

“Ah. Good night, then.” He parted the bushes with his hands.

“Take care.” Once he had squeezed through safely, you turned toward the house, thinking of what to tell your brother to convince him that no, you were not sleeping with Ten and in fact, had no plans to.

…

 You couldn’t see anything in the dark. You could only hear the rustling of sheets, heavy breathing that wasn’t your own. Silk against your legs and chills touching you in places that should be covered. You smelled perfume that wasn’t yours. You couldn’t move. You were hyper-aware of your surroundings, but you just couldn’t see anything. Footsteps. Breathing. You remained as still as possible. And then ice-cold fingers digging into your thigh, and the terrified scream ripped from your throat masking the deep derisive laugh in the background, and then someone shouting your name, Y/N, Y/N, Y/N…

“Y/N! Y/N! Wake up, idiot!”

You shot bolt upright, gasping. Your eyes burned as the light hit them. Covering your face with your hands, you tried to remember where you were. In class. Fuck.

“Hey, are you okay?”

You opened your eyes carefully, viewing an empty classroom in front of you, save for your friend who always sat next to you. You must have fallen asleep.

“What—what time is it?” You lurched to your feet, the room still spinning. She reached out an arm to steady you.

“It’s four. Class is over.” You stumbled to the door. “You sure you okay? Should I drive you home?”

You waved aside her offer. “Thanks for waking me up. I can find my own way home.” You didn’t want to admit that you were extremely disturbed by the dream you just had. You just needed some time alone to sit and think.

What the heck had that been? The fear that gripped you in the dream still hadn’t been lost completely. You sensed that you knew what it meant. Is that what this is? Am I afraid of trusting Ten? Is that it? Am I scared that he would use me if I opened up to him? What on earth was I thinking, inviting him to a party, to my own house? He could be a murderer for all I know!

You sighed, burying your head in your arms. I am running on thin ice here, just waiting for it to break.

…

That night, your meeting was brief and earlier than usual. You exchanged phone numbers a little too late. He recounted his awe at the Havenstock and that they refused to tell him the amount the suit cost.

“So you’re wearing a dress? What colour is it?” he demanded, eager to know.

“You’ll see,” you replied mysteriously. He pouted.

“But aren’t we supposed to match?”

You scoffed. “What is this, high school prom?”

“Ah. You’re right.” A bitter little smile danced across his lips. “I never went to prom.”

“Really? Neither did I.” Even you were surprised by how much you had in common.

“How come?”

“Chicken pox.”

“Ouch. That’s horrible. I had the flu.”

“Prom is overrated anyway.”

“True.”

“Ah. Hey, I have to leave soon. My dad’s back home.”

“Oh, I can walk—“

“No!” You begged. “Please don’t be a gentleman today. I don’t want to know what happens if my dad hears that I sneak out at night to talk to you.”

A mix of emotions crossed his face. “Okay, first, I agree that I don’t want to get on your dad’s bad side. Two, I knew you came out here just to see me.” He shot you a creepy derp smile. “And three, but your brother already knows though?”

“Don’t worry about Minnie,” you reassured him. “He’s doesn’t snitch on me.”

You saw him mouth the word Minnie. “Good night, then. I’ll see you tomorrow at seven.”

“I’ll pick you up. Text me your address.” You waved your phone in the air. He gave you a thumbs up. You stuck out your hand. “I’m glad to be doing business with you.” He smirked, shaking yours. As your fingers drew apart, you were struck by your dream. His fingers were warm. They couldn’t possibly turn into those icy cold ones…could they?

…

and all I could feel

was the heat

coursing through every cell of my body

the heat of fury

and forced desire

and the taste of fear on my tongue

dissolved the words stuck in my throat

a cry for help

and regret

I should have just kept my mouth shut

in the first place.

…

 You tucked the final piece of your hair into place.

Your heart was in your throat, jaw aching with anxiety. You had no idea why you were so nervous—this wasn’t your first formal party. True, you hadn’t been to one in quite a while. But still! This wasn’t such a nerve-wracking scene.

“Get yourself together, Y/N,” you whispered firmly. “Business.”

Your fingertips brushed over the stones set in your earrings. Diamonds. You weren’t fond of them. You generally disliked the extravagance that a lot of rich people exhibited, but you let tonight be an exception. You were going to take as much advantage of your parents’ money as you could before you left after your finals.

You stood up, hands running over your dress, giddy at its silky smoothness. The burgundy shade of the gown, coupled with a matching shade of lipstick, gave you a look of maturity and confidence. The thin straps that held the dress up curved downward, just barely dipping into your chest. A thin silver chain bearing a diamond pendant lay on your sternum, accentuating your collarbones. Subjectively speaking, you were nervous about it all. Objectively speak—

Ding. Dong.

You jumped, scared out of your wits. Who the heck is here now?

You stepped carefully down the stairs. The light was left on in the living room, but the house was empty except for you. You trusted that the security wouldn’t let anyone in without confirming their identity.

You cautiously unlocked the door and peeked outside.

Your mouth fell open.

“Hey.” How did he sound so casual dressed like that, a cocky smirk on his face? You took in his appearance, holding the door open wider. The tailors at Havenstock certainly did their job well. His hair was brushed back, exposing his forehead. It suited him. In his hand was a rose. “Ohh, holy shit.” He just caught sight of your attire. His eyes raked down your body, taking in everything.

“I said I’d pick you up! Ah, whatever. Come inside,” you said, amused at his reaction.

He followed you in, still drooling over your change-up. “You look…um.”

“Pretty? I hope.” You gestured for him to sit.

He pondered your answer. “…Mouthwatering.”

“Wha—“ You burst into laughter. “Why are you so weird?”

“Hey, that’s a risk you took.” He handed you the rose. “I know you love it.”

You grasped the flower delicately. “I’m sure I don’t.” You gestured to his outfit. “You look really good, too. I’m not going to say something stupid like mouthwatering. What even.” He didn’t look remotely abashed. You checked your watch. “Let me just get my purse. Here—“ you tossed him the keys to your brother’s old car. “Drive. Okay?”

He nodded, his eyes hooded, biting his bottom lip. You discovered that his expression gave you butterflies.

Subjectively speaking, you were insecure about the dress. Objectively speaking, you were a total knockout.

As you ran back upstairs, you found that you weren’t worried about the dream anymore. Fuck the dream. What’s life without living it? Without a little risk? My instincts tell me to trust him. I don’t think he’s a bad person. You wanted to trust him. You were going to.

…

 “Pull up here,” you instructed Ten, who pulled the car into a compound after being cleared by security. The party was in a hall at the company, fortunately, and as the neon logo of your family’s business came into view, Ten let out a whoop.

“Holy heck, SM?” He exclaimed in sheer disbelief. “That’s your company? Are you fucking kidding?”

As he parked the car, you clasped his wrist. “Don’t forget. If they ask what you do—“

“I say I’m your classmate,” he finished, remembering the pact the two of you had made the previous night over text.

“Right. If you say you’re an engineer, they’ll follow it up with a ton of questions like where you work and how much money you make. But no one gives a damn if you’re a dreamer. Since it doesn’t pay bills. Also, stay away from Jung-ssi when he’s drunk.”

“I see.” He glanced through the rear-view mirror at another couple who had exited their car parked behind yours. “You ready to go?”

You only gripped his wrist tighter. “I don’t know. I haven’t been to one of these things since the beginning of high school.”

“Wait, really?”

You nodded. “Yeah. So most of these people saw me then, and have no idea what I look like now or what I’m doing. They probably think I’m going to join the business soon.”

“So you’re going to tell them that you are?”

“No. Don’t you see?” you shook him. “This is where I can be a rebel. No one’s going to make a scene.”

“You’ll be fine. This is your zone. I’m worried that I’m going to fuck everything up.”

“Just be yourself.”

“And get judged?” he asked incredulously. “Hell, no!”

“Okay. Just—don’t go out of your way to seem rich or anything. The more lies we tell, the harder it is to maintain them.” You finally let go of him. “No one will pay much attention to us.”

He scoffed. “To me, you mean. All the attention is going to be on you. You look gorgeous.”

You didn’t blush. You swore you didn’t. The heat was just because you were stuck in the car for a while. Not because he complimented you or anything. “Yeah, but you’re the one taking me home.”

His face fell blank and then understanding washed over his features. “Oh, you meant like literally.” He fanned himself with a hand. “Phew. That sounded hotter than it should have been.”

You giggled. “Pervert.” (he made an ‘oi’ sound) “You’re going to fight the others away from me, won’t you?”

He made a fist. “Sure will. Fighting!”

“Let’s go then.”

…

 You thought you would be unnoticeable and no one would pay attention to you. You thought you could slip inside, see your brother, present yourself briefly in front of your parents, completely avoid any person Ma had set up, especially Mark (when had he even come back to the city?)

The only thing you learned as you walked inside is that everyone there in your brother’s generation was starved of entertainment.

It was almost like the entrance scene of the hero in an action movie, except you didn’t have an explosion going off behind you.

Heads turned, mouths parted in surprise. Either no one was expecting you specifically to be there, or they thought you two were, in Ten’s words, mouthwatering. Speaking of whom.

You glanced slyly over at Ten to see how he was coping with the obvious attention, half-expecting him to be all sweaty and nervous. You totally underestimated him.

One hand in his pocket, another running through his hair, slight smirk in place, he looked so—there was only one word for it—cool. He looked like a man, not the boy you had come to see him as. It was all you could do to keep your jaw from dropping. He glanced over at you and winked. Winked. With that cocky grin in his face. Like he knew exactly the effect he had on everyone. Jerk.

A satisfied, confident smirk grew on your own lips as well, turning back to the people greeting you, employees in the company. You knew them. You liked to go to the office sometimes with food or drinks or with your guitar, just to cause a distraction. They were the few people in the business world that saw you as a person and not an asset.  Just to make your point more clear, you linked your arm with his.

And he was so courteous. So polite. Once you had introduced Ten (or Chittaphon as he decided to be for tonight), he bowed to them and greeted them as if they were the highest ranking in the room. You nearly laughed at the surprise on their faces. They certainly weren’t used to being treated like that.

Ten minutes into the party, both of you found yourselves with a drink in hand, no one surrounding you or bombarding you with questions. You had spotted your brother several times, always with a crowd around him, but so far no sign of your parents. Good. Maybe you could get away with this.

Your brother caught your eye from across the room and you raised your glass to him teasingly. He nodded at you, trying and failing to keep a straight face. You observed him talk to the two people with him, shaking them off and making his way to you.

As he approached, he looked both of you up and down, crossing his arms. You knew it was coming, you were just waiting for him to bust out a joke, but you didn’t think he’d say, “I have to admit, you look good together.”

You flushed, heat crawling up your neck. “Shut up.” Ten didn’t seem fazed by the comment. You couldn’t believe how well he was pulling this off.

“Changmin!” someone called out. The three of you turned to the newcomer.

“Yunho hyung!” Your brother embraced his friend. “I didn’t think you’d make it.”

“How could I miss it?” he replied. “Oh!” he caught sight of you. “Is this Y/N?” You forced a smile. “You’ve grown! And who’s this?”

Before you could open your mouth, Ten cut to the chase. “I’m Y/N’s classmate, sir. Chittaphon.” They shook hands firmly. “It’s nice to meet you.”

Yunho nodded in approval, evidently sticking to his old philosophy of using a handshake to judge a person’s character. “You seem like a smart young man. You’ll be good for her.”

You rolled your eyes. Ten looked at you, alarmed at being mistaken for your literal boyfriend, but you just shook your head, telling him not to argue.

“Well, let me just see Choi Siwon for a second. His younger brother got accepted to the Marines, did you hear?”

Changmin waited until Yunho was out of earshot to hiss at you, “I thought you said he was an engineer?”

“For now he’s my classmate, I’ll explain later,” you told him. “Got it?”

“Okay.”

“Where’s Ma? I didn't see her yet.”

“She was around here somewhere.”

“Don’t send her looking for me, okay?”

“Too late.”

“Y/N!”

You winced as your mother’s voice reached your ears. You saw Ten tense up beside you. “Ma.”

She came into view, pleased that you came. Your grip on Ten’s arms shifted, holding onto him tighter. Her eyes caught the movement and her lips pursed.

“What does he do?” she asked you, as if he wasn’t standing right there. You wished your eyes were lasers. How rude can a person get?

“He’s my classmate,” you answered. Her scowl deepened.

“What is your name?” she shot at Ten.

“My name is Chittaphon, ma’am.”

Creases formed above her eyebrows. “What do your parents do?”

“My father works in the road transport corporation.”

She glanced down to his arm, where you still held on. He made a motion as if to move away from you, but you held firm. You weren’t going to let your mother decide your life for you.

“Mark was asking me whether you came,” she informed me. “He is looking for you.”

Classic. To talk to me about another guy when I was already with one. “Well, I’m certainly not looking for him.” I’m sorry Mark, but I’m not interested. He’ll understand, right? “I can’t fathom why you would think we were compatible that way.”

“If I hear you being disrespectful towards him,” she threatened, “there will be consequences.”

“I honestly don’t care.” You laced your fingers into Ten’s. She turned on her heel and marched off, muttering darkly. His palm was sweating. You let go of him.

“Look what you’ve done, you made her mad.” Changmin wiped his forehead with his handkerchief. “Now I have to deal with her.”

“Sorry, is it my fault that she nags?”

“Oh, she’s talking to Yeonhee, I have to go.” He patted your arm before dashing off to stop your mother from picking a fight with his secretary.

“Y/N,” Ten muttered in your ear, “could I use the restroom for a moment?”

“Yeah, of course. They’re over there.” You pointed them out, and he thanked you. You stared at him sympathetically as he left. Your mother was just too much for someone to handle.

Only after he left did you realize you had been left exposed. Your immunity had gone. Shit. Should I go to the restroom as well?

The strains of the song playing in the hall reached your ears. ‘Sick of all these people talking, sick of all this noise, tired of all these cameras flashing, sick of being poised…’

Halsey, you thought. Appropriate song for the situation. Funny.

“Excuse me? Y/N, right?”

You spun around to come face-to-face with a handsome young man you had never seen in your life. He seemed a bit pixie-like. Shrewd. His voice was youthful. Foreign accent. He wore his suit as if he had been born in it. Third generation at least, I’m sure. In his hand was a glass of champagne. You had no clue who this was, but you were polite. You smiled.

He seemed to take that as an invitation to talk. “I’m glad you made it. Your mother’s said quite a lot about you.”

Your mother talked to him? Why? Alarms went off in your head. “Huh?”

He looked perplexed. “She said she’d like us to meet?”

You tilted your head and blinked rapidly. “I’m sorry,” you said, waving your hands around in confusion. “What was your name?”

He was dumbfounded, as if he couldn’t believe you didn’t know his name. “Mark. Mark Lee.”

Wait. What?! Mark Lee? You smacked your head with your palm. I thought Ma was talking about Mark Tuan? What the hell? Who is this Mark? Fuck fuck fuck. “Oh yeah….” you drawled. “She did say…forgive me, I just couldn’t correlate the name to the face. So. Yeah.”

He relaxed, flashing a bright smile. “It’s okay. Happens to the best of us.”

You smiled apologetically, both of you lapsing into silence, sipping your drinks and watching the others at the party congratulate Changmin. You were looking for Ten, but he must have not come out of the restroom yet. Damn.

“Nice party, huh? You must be proud of your brother.”

You nodded. “Yeah. I am.”

“The product is so cool,” he continued. “You remember the production team at the press meeting? Damn. It’s so clever, you know? Merging the software like that…”

You couldn’t help it at all. You tuned him out at once. Business bored you to no end. From his enthusiasm, he was definitely a biz nut like your brother. Ugh. He was nice, sure. But not your type at all. Your eyes darted around, distracted, and you saw Ten across the room, talking quite seriously to a man you recognized as the General Manager of OWEnt. Wait, what was that guy doing here? Changmin hated him. It was probably your dad who invited him. Out of courtesy. You narrowed your eyes, hoping nothing was wrong.

“…great investment. Don’t you think so?” He ended, turning to you expectantly.

You paused for a beat and then told him, “I think you should know that I didn’t understand a word you just said.”

“Ah.” He chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck. “I’m not great at explaining stuff. But you get what I mean, right? I mean, they said it at the press meeting…right?” His face fell at your bemused expression. “You weren’t there, were you?”

You shook your head. “No, I wasn’t. I have nothing to do with this company, and to be frank, I know nothing about business.”

“Wait.” He held a hand up. “I’m about…” he scrunched up his nose, “…ninety-eight percent sure that your mom told mine that you would be joining the company soon.”

Ma. I wish you weren’t my mother so I could kill you and only end up in jail for murder and not matricide. I can’t believe she would go that far!

“Um, no, I’m not,” you clarified. “You must have heard wrong. I’m actually in my final year at college. As an English major.”

He didn’t speak for a while, brain processing that. “Whoa. You mean like…Shakespeare?”

“Among others, yes.”

“Nice.” He took a swig of his drink. “You know, back when I started learning his stuff in high school, I thought he was such a b—“ he broke off, looking around. “—a jerk. But by the end, when you get used to it, you’re like, dang, this dude’s so—“

“Badass.” Both of you spoke at the same time and then burst out laughing.

As you composed yourself, you noticed Ten and the man still talking, but this time, Ten looked absolutely murderous. Once the man left, he stood there still, fists clearly clenched. Then abruptly turned and walked out the door.

“Mark,” you said, eyes still on the doors. “It was nice meeting you, it really was, but I’m afraid I have to go now. I’ll see you around, I suppose.”

“Yeah sure, ok—“ You didn’t stop to hear the rest of his gracious acceptance, you were almost running out the door behind Ten.

…

 “Ten!”

He didn’t seem to hear you. He just kept walking out into the parking lot. Or maybe he did hear you and didn’t care. His pace slowed down, thankfully, because you were wearing heels and simply couldn’t run that fast.

“Ten! Please! Talk to me!”

He stopped. You hobbled up to him, but as soon as you did, he turned quickly around.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have just—shit, sorry, I don’t know why—let’s go back—“

“Ten.”

“—supposed to be with you, I’m sorry I just left—“

“Ten!” You yelled. He fell quiet, fists clenching and unclenching, breathing heavily. You reached out cautiously and touched his hand, eyes gentle and sympathetic. “What happened?” He seemed to recognize the earnestness in your eyes.

“I—“ he sighed. “It’s nothing.”

“You were talking to Jang Seokwoo. Why?”

He avoided your eyes. “Until last Monday, I worked for him.”

The words fell like a bomb into your head. “What?” you half-whispered, utterly horrified. “You worked at OWEnt?” Reluctantly he nodded. “Listen, that man and the company are no good at all. He’s despicable. You’re better off not working there. Don’t let that son of a bitch talk to you.”

“I know,” he replied. “I’m not upset that I was fired. It’s just that…” he hesitated.

“Tell me.”

“He’s the one who’s been making it hard for me to get a job anywhere else.”

You gasped, rage coursing through you. You would have marched right back in there and given the fucker a piece of your mind, if Ten hadn’t chosen that moment to hold your hand. He needed your support right now.

“You’re good enough, you know?” you said quietly. “In case you were wondering. Your skill level in writing software doesn’t determine your worth.”

He smiled sadly. “Not when you’re a software engineer.”

You linked your fingers. “I know a person who despises him. And one company he can’t influence.”

He understood what you meant and shook his head. “Y/N, no. You can’t do that for me.”

“I can if I want to.”

“Can we drop it? Let’s go back to the party.”

“Okay.” You lifted your hands in surrender. “Dropped. But why didn’t you come back to me instead of standing around?”

He messed with his hair. “You were busy talking to that guy. I didn’t want to interrupt.”

“I wish you had.” You leaned against his shoulder. “That was the guy Ma is trying to get me married to.”

“And?”

“He’s nice and all, but he’s definitely not my type.” You wrinkled your nose. “All business.”

He let out a breathy laugh. “What is your type, then?”

Guys with a heart, you wanted to say, who stand on a bridge at midnight staring at the water because it calms them. Guys who worry about strangers, who talk them out of suicide. Dreamers. “Um. I don’t really know. But he’s definitely not it.”

The silence between the two of you was comfortable, never awkward or embarrassing like it was with other people. You were content in the quiet. You didn’t have to talk, and neither did he.

“Shouldn’t we go back to the party?”

You blinked, considering it. “But you don’t want to, though.”

He stretched. “It’s not about what I want. We made a deal.”

“If this is about the money, I’m still pay—“

“It’s not just about the money,”  he interrupted, a tad frustrated. “I promised you I would be there, that I’d chase away your admirers. And I couldn’t keep it.”

“You did enough! You did more than enough! You were fantastic.” You couldn’t believe what he was saying. “Do you know how smug I looked the entire time? Has no one told you how…delicious…you look in a suit?”

He grunted. “Pervert.”

You laughed, the sound ringing loud and clear in the empty parking lot. “I made my appearance. They know I came. We don’t have to stay any longer.”

“I’ll drive you home, then.”

“But I don’t want to go home just yet,” you whined.

“…Then where to?”

…

 “This is a nice park,” Ten remarked. You ripped your heels off before plopping down on a bench, sighing in relief.  

The night had fallen thickly on the earth. Cloud cover covered most of the stars, but the moon still smiled down on you, its silver glow the only light you were provided with. The damp grass felt like heaven between your toes, even though you couldn’t see its green. A slight chill blew through the place.

“Talk to me,” he whispered, revering the serenity.

“About what?” your voice equally low.

“Anything. Why do you like to write?”

Good question. You didn’t know. “Um. Why I like to write…I’m not that great with words. Talking, I mean.” You stared at the sky. “I guess writing gives me a way to say things I could never say with my mouth. And then there’s the immunity. If you tell someone your feelings, there’s the chance they would use it against you. If you show them something you wrote, four out of five times they don’t realize what it means, so no one could make you feel bad about it.”

“But no one would understand what you tell them.”

“That’s a small price to pay. I’d rather have no one understand me.”

“I understand you. Tell me something you wrote.”

Heat ran through your face. You never shared your writing if you could help it. Changmin was an exception. “My writing?” You were already racking your brain for a piece you could recite to him.

“I promise I won’t make fun of it.”

“I know you won’t.” You swallowed nervously nevertheless. “I’ve read this one over and over, so many times, I know it by heart now.”

“Go ahead.”

You cleared your throat.

“we dream of love and peace

of quiet nights and starry skies

of the world in the lonely hours of the morning

places no one else has seen

.

we dream of magic and miracles

stuck in the monotony of what they call

the real world

.

but we know

—out there, far from this little town—

that there are people and places

waiting for us

calling us

luring us

.

and I know

you want to leave

I know

you want to feel things you were never allowed to feel

I know

you want to break free

from everything

.

and people scorn you

telling you not to believe in the lies

but we know the truth, you and I

and I know,

when they laugh, I won’t

i can be your wings

fly

.

and yet we stay

with the ones we know

out of love? or guilt?

.

but your life is not meant to waste away

here

where no one understands you

.

your life is meant to live

to travel

to learn

to seek

and to celebrate the magic

you never realized

was always within you.”

 You inhaled sharply when you finished. This was quite a personal poem you had just recited.

Silence. You could only hear your heartbeat pounding in your ears and your hands were shivering, anticipating (or dreading?) what he would say.

“Wow,” he breathed. “That was beautiful.” You sighed in relief.

‘I’ve never let anyone hear that.”

He took your hand. “I’m honoured, then.”

Neither of you felt the need to talk much.

“I understand now, at least.”

You looked over at him. “What?”

“How you’re expected to be. It’s so suffocating. I guess life isn’t better on this side of the bridge after all.” He patted your hand. “I don’t blame you for wanting to run away.”

You couldn’t begin to describe how much that meant to you. For someone to understand. For someone to be on your side. For someone to empathize.

You were glad, for once, that you had gone to the bridge that night.

 …

 “Do you want to come inside?”

Ten paused, his hand still on the doorknob where he held it open for you, his coat slung over his shoulder like a model. Both of you were in front of your house, still empty. Your family hadn’t yet returned. You could hear Lexi barking from inside.

“I want to, but your people could be back any moment and I’m deathly scared of your parents.”

You giggled. “I don’t blame you. When should I pick you up tomorrow?”

“I could just come here like toda—“

“No, I’ll pick you up. I’d like to see your apartment.”

He looked horrified. “There’s honestly nothing to see. Besides, my roommate looks crappy in the morning and he’s not going to be nice…”

“That’s okay.” You leaned up on your tiptoes and pressed your lips to his cheek sweetly. “Tomorrow, then.”

You saw his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down as he swallowed. When he spoke, he sounded a little breathless. “Yeah. Tomorrow.”

…

 beautiful stranger

where did you come from? where will you go?

do I not have the right to know?

.

young is the night

soft silver light

and the stars are gone

they have no faith in us

the moon stays with us

are they wrong?

.

with the world wrapped in darkness

she sees more than the sun

the day sees the purpose

the night sees the passion

.

the moon stays to watch

what will become of us?

I fear she knows but I dare not ask

beautiful stranger

where did you come from? where will you go?

the risk is too great to mask.

 A loud knocking at your door made Lexi bark and made you jump, a line drawn across the page you were writing on. Cursing under your  breath, you closed your notebook and went to open the door. Changmin’s face peered back at you through the crack in the door. This idiot! The traitor! You seized his shirt and pulled furiously.

“Wha—“

“Ma was setting me up with Mark Lee?” you wailed, shaking him. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

His mouth fell open. Choking over his words, he managed to splutter, “You little bitch! I did tell you!”

“I thought you meant Mark Tuan!” You released him and tugged at your hair.

He looked utterly bewildered. “Mark Tuan? Mark Tuan?? Mark Tuan is in Los Angeles!”

You threw your hands in the air. “I thought he came back, what was I supposed to think!”

“How is that my fault?” he asked, pointing at himself for emphasis. “I thought you knew Mark Lee, I’ve mentioned him around here a few times.”

“I’ve never heard of him in my life,” you whined, moving back to lean against your desk, palms flat on the surface.

He leaned against the door. “What’s got you so upset? Is he such a bad guy?”

You thought about it. “He’s…he’s actually pretty nice. But he’s like you. Stupid budding biz wiz. It’s just—“ You let out a frustrated noise. “I was caught off guard! It was so embarrassing! I don’t like surprises; I had this whole speech planned out and everything.”

Before he could laugh at you for that, the doorknob turned.

“Dad!” You both exclaimed. He squeezed his way inside, standing awkwardly beside your brother before clearing his throat.

“Yunho says you’ve found a boyfriend,” he began. Changmin almost started laughing.

“Oh, no,” you groaned, burying your face in your hands. “Dad, can we not talk about—“

He held a hand up for silence. “No, I want to know.” He paused. “Is he good to you?”

You opened your mouth to explain that no, Dad, he’s not my boyfriend, but you stopped yourself. Why not go along with the façade? Let them believe it. Maybe it would get Ma off your back. “So far, yes.” You noticed your brother raising his eyebrows like he didn’t expect you to lie. Why aren’t you just telling him he’s not?

You threw him back a glare. Mind your own damn business. Min-ah. He scowled.

“Are you sure he’s not with you for the money?” your father questioned.

“I don’t think he is, Dad,” you answered carefully. “I mean, he knows I won’t be inheriting anything after I graduate—“

“Who said you wouldn’t be inheriting anything?”

You paused, confused. “Ma.” He rubbed his temples.

“I think it was a ruse to get her to join the business,” Changmin cut in swiftly.

“It’s okay, Dad,” you said quietly. “I don’t need it. After college, I’ll be out of your hair.”

There was a long silence.

“Will you?”

Your father’s eyes were misty.

“Will you forget us all that easily?”

“Dad—“

“Well guess what, we won’t.”

You swallowed your feelings down. “I didn’t mean it like that—“

“I know you didn’t. I’m only sad about one thing. You used to be the girl who ran home from school to tell us everything that happened that day,” he smiled fondly at the memory, “and now I barely see you smile. You don’t talk to us anymore.” Your fingers closed around the spine of your notebook fearfully, already dreading what would happen if they were to read it. “I understand that you’ve grown, but that doesn’t mean I’ve accepted it. You’re still my little girl.” He turned to open the door. “By the way,” he added, tone changing to a more professional one, “what I came in here to say is, I want to talk to your boyfriend. Tell him to meet me someday.”

That certainly broke the tension.

“Dad, get out.” You pointed at the door. “Out. Both of you.” You father chuckled and walked out into the hallway, but Changmin stayed behind. “You need a special invitation?” Lexi snapped at him in agreement.

“He’s right, you know,” he told you.

“About what?”

“About everything.” He smirked. “I wonder what he’s going to say when he finds out you’re lying.”

…

 Barely five minutes after your parents had left with your brother in the morning, the doorbell rang. The retreat was to be held at the country club, booked for the weekend. Lexi was safe with a pet care that your brother had found. Poor baby. She was going to be very uncooperative. You had no idea whether you were expected to stay at the club or if you could come back home. You wondered what Ten would do. The doorbell rang again.

“Shit, okay, I’m coming!” you yelped, racing to throw it open. You deflated. “I told you I would pick you up!” The whine in your voice was evident. Ten walked smugly into the house, dropping his bags just inside the doorway. He looked like he had won a game. So, this was a game, huh? Fine. One point to him now, but you were sure as hell going to win.

“Yeah, you’re not seeing my apartment until we get a lot closer.” He stopped to admire some picture frames propped up on the mantelpiece. “Two guys rooming together, can you imagine the state of it?” He shuddered. “Is this you?”

You flipped the picture around so his attention was on you. “Are you ready to go?”

He flipped it right back. “Sure am. Are you?”

“I was just about to leave.”

He snatched the keys from you as you walked outside to the car. And you let him.

“How come you didn’t reply to my message last night?” he asked, starting the car. “Fell asleep?”

You were about to answer when he jolted, killing the ignition and patting his pockets frantically. Terror on his face.

“Fuck,” he said tersely. “I forgot my phone!”

You loved the implication. He would have to go back to his apartment now. You crossed your arms, waiting for him to make a decision.

“If you don’t want me at your place so badly, you could go the weekend without it,” you suggested.

“That would work,” he said, too far gone to comprehend what you were saying. “But I can’t trust my roommate with it. Fuck, I have to go back.” A point to you?

“I promise I won’t say anything about the mess.”

…

 Honestly, you hadn’t been to this side of the bridge much, either. You looked around curiously as he manoeuvred the car through the mild traffic. His apartment complex seemed a cozy but dull sort of place.

He led you up to the second floor and rapped sharply on the door labelled 127. After a full minute, it opened.

“Ah, you’re back so soon?” a young man you could only assume was his roommate dug a knuckle into his head. Ten batted his hand away. “Oh, and who’s this?” You were too busy taking in his sharp (and puffy? did he just wake up?) features.

“This is Y/N,” Ten replied for you, nudging your side. You snapped out of your admiration.

“Ow! Hi. I’m Y/N.” You tried to rub your ribs subtly.

“So this is Y/N, huh?” he leaned against the doorframe, holding up a phone and reading off of it. “Yesterday night. 12:04. Hey, are you awake? Y/N? Hey. Answer meeee. You’re never asleep yet. Don’t leave me like this what the hell. Aw,” he cooed. “Someone’s needy. So cute.”

Ten’s eyes nearly popped out of his skull. “Taeyong, give me back my phone!” His roommate dashed into the apartment, cackling. Ten followed, yelling, “Give it back, asshole!”

“That’s hyung to you!”

You sighed, letting yourself inside and glancing around. It wasn’t as messy as Ten claimed. It was actually pretty nice. A nice change to the much bigger and colder spaces you were used to. There was a sense of warmth here. Familiarity. You liked it.

A wail resounded in one of the bedrooms and Ten stalked out, phone in hand, hunting successful. You giggled.

“Let’s go,” he said firmly, his fingers wrapping around your wrist, possessive.

A dishevelled Taeyong appeared in the hallway. “Y/N. Take care of him, huh? He’s a little delicate.”

“Hyung, shut up.”

“Do you have any idea how much he talks about you? I mean, honestly, such an annoyance—“ he dodged Ten’s punch. “—gonna have to get him to pay royalties for using your name as entertainment so much—ow!” Ten got a hit in.

“We’re leaving,” Ten nearly growled. The last thing we heard before the door slammed shut was, ‘have a nice honeymoon’.

“He seems…interesting,” you offered.

“He’s an idiot.” Ten scowled. “Don’t listen to him. He’s a filthy liar.”

“Of course he is.” You gestured behind you vaguely as you made your way downstairs. “How do you know him?”

“He was my senior in school. We were neighbourhood friends.” He made an impatient noise. “Sometimes I regret it.”

…

 The weather was nice, to say the least. It was cloudy, but not in the way like there was going to be a storm. More so in the way like the sun was just tired as heck of shining and decided to take a day off from the office to work from home. You couldn’t relate more.

Ten skilfully guided the car to a stop in the lot shown to him by the security guard. He had never been near this type of elitist club and he made it known to you. Hauling his backpack over his shoulder and handing yours to you, he scrunched up his face at the property.

“You’re right, it is elitist,” you easily agreed. “Annoying, but hey,” you nudged him, “it’s my parents’ money, I’m gonna make the most of it. You should too.”

“I certainly will,” he muttered, running his fingertips over the carved lions that flanked either side of the entrance.

“You can relax, here, you know,” you informed him, “it’s not going to be as uptight as the part—oh!” You broke off, surprised as two small children dashed across the path in front of you, almost causing you to bump into them and knock them over. You didn’t recognize them, but they were surely here for the retreat with their parents. They didn’t mind you in the slightest, only continuing carelessly on their way.

“Careful,” Ten chided you playfully, his eyes bright.

“Oh, shut up.” You pointed into the distance. “I can see Minnie. Come on. Let’s go say hi.”

Changmin and his secretary were busy greeting the people as they arrived. Yeonhee’s eyes lit up when she saw you, relieved. You really felt sorry for her, stuck with glue to your brother’s side and hearing your mother’s harsh criticism for whatever she did. Lucky Ma wasn’t here now. You didn’t want to imagine what would happen if Yeonhee ended up as Ma’s daughter in law.

“Greetings, sister.” Changmin bowed, clearly mocking you.

“Peasant,” you shot back. “You know we really don’t want to be here, right?”

“Does it look like I do?” he questioned, gesturing to himself.

Your eyes slid to Yeonhee. “Something makes me think you do.” Thankfully, she didn’t catch your meaning or the redness dusting Minnie’s cheeks. “Anyway, where are we supposed to sleep?”

In hindsight, that wasn’t exactly the best question to ask right after you made fun of him. He jumped at the chance to retaliate. “Don’t expect us to room you together!” he exclaimed. “It’s not going to happen. Two drinks in and you will throw all safety out the window.”

You groaned. “Really?” You turned to Ten. “Please ignore what he just said. I don’t know him.”

He only shook his head sceptically. “I’ve heard much worse. Mm. 4 on 10.”

Changmin looked offended. “Whatever. I suppose I’ll be rooming with my brother in law, then. There’s no problem with that, is there?” He threw an arm around Ten and squeezed his shoulder threateningly. Ten grimaced.  

“I think she’s told me too much about you for me to get scared, hyung.”

“And I’ll be rooming with my sister in law, won’t I?” You linked arms with Yeonhee, who finally tensed and blushed, covering her face with her hand.

Whether it was because he noticed her discomfort, or he just resigned to his fate, Changmin quickly let the topic go. Shoving room keys into your hands, he set the two of you down the path to the cabins.

“There’s brunch down by the mess!” he called after us. “It’s somewhere on the way!”

“Noted!”

…

It wasn’t until three minutes after you got to the mess for brunch that you remembered an important fact about boys that you completely forgot after high school: boys go crazy when they see food. And another thing—men in their twenties were still, very much, boys.

You lost Ten within the first ten (coincidence? I think not) minutes. No matter where and how hard you looked, you simply couldn’t find him. Was your eyesight diminishing? You wouldn’t be surprised, from the amount of time you read in dim light. Was it because he was tiny and could squeeze in anywhere? Probably. Maybe you were just too hungry to look properly. You couldn’t just stand there with a bowl of fruit salad in your hands looking this way and that like an idiot who didn’t know how to eat. You were far too anxious for that. So you moved aside, perching on an unoccupied table, dipping your fork into the bowl and stabbing a piece of apple.

“Hey, Y/N.” You paused mid-chew. That wasn’t Ten’s voice, but it seemed annoyingly familiar. You turned and saw the boy from last night. Mark. Mark Lee. Your face went pink at the memory.

“Hey. Mark,” you replied reluctantly, not wanting to entertain the conversation but also unwilling to seem overly rude.

He offered you an easy smile. “So. Forgive me for asking this, I know it’s the weekend and too early in the morning, but I was just wondering…um. You mentioned yesterday that you weren’t going to join the business. What are you planning to do?”

He was absolutely right. It was not the time to be discussing this, but at least he apologized for it. And well, if the thought had been keeping him up all night, you might as well indulge him. “I’d like to write.” In a way he understands, you reminded yourself. “Like poetry and stuff.”

“Wow. That’s neat.” He sat on the table, staring ahead. You suddenly felt eyes on you from the other side of Mark and you leaned back, peering behind him. A little ways away, Ten was staring at the both of you, nearly in hysterics watching your plight. He was spooning what appeared to be ice cream(?) into his mouth. Wait, there was ice cream here? No. Focus. You widened your eyes at him, furious and he laughed silently, pointing his spoon at you.

Save me, you mouthed.

He shook his head, clearly enjoying this. You pouted.

“Why the sudden question?” you asked Mark, returning your attention to him.

He shrugged. “Just thought I’d get to know you better. For the record, I don’t mind if you’re not into business. I can explain that to my mom.” He snapped his fingers. “Actually. Are you free anytime next week?”

You weren’t sure where this was going. “Um. Why?”

“I thought we could, you know, grab coffee or something.” He scratched the back of his neck. “Get to know each other?”

Whoa. Wow. Okay. Back the fuck up. “You mean like a date?”

He nodded, relaxing a little. “Is that okay?”

No. It wasn’t. This had to stop. “Mark, actually I—“

You were rudely cut off by the loud unprecedented arrival of a figure you had come to find familiar and comforting. You were relieved and embarrassed at the same time.

“Babe!” He exclaimed, coming close to you. “I was looking for you everywhere.”

Before you could protest the use of the pet name, your brain registered that Ten had come closer to you, and that he wasn’t stopping.

The next thing you knew was his lips on yours. It was over before you even knew it was happening. A simple peck, in anyone’s terms.

You were frozen in shock, but you had the sense not to make it too obvious. This must be his way of ‘rescuing’ you. Not bad. You cleared your throat awkwardly.

“I got lost in the crowd, I guess,” you breathed out in answer to his question.  

“Ah, it’s okay. Have you tried this ice cream, though?” You winced at his obnoxious tone.

“Mark, I’m sorry, I really should go—“ Ten cut you off again.

“Mark! Hey!” Ten stuck out a hand. “Y/N’s mentioned. It’s nice to meet you.” Cringing inwardly at both Ten’s attitude and Mark’s expression, you watched as Mark shook his hand. Ten really isn’t going to let me say anything, huh?

“Let’s get the ice cream, yeah?” you quickly intercepted, pulling Ten away. You had no intention of this becoming a bro-time for the two of them. “Sorry, Mark, I guess I’ll see you around!” Yanking sharply on Ten’s sleeve, you managed to drag him away. You vaguely heard Mark mumble a reply, but you were too far to hear.

Once out of earshot, you pulled Ten in front of you and smacked his arm. He made an innocently hurt face.

“When I said, save me, that isn’t what I meant, idiot.” Just to push his buttons, you rubbed your lips, disgusted. They still tingled, as if they wanted to feel his again.

He slung an arm around you, your knees buckling under his force. “Hey, at least he’s not going to bother you anymore.”

Well. I guess he has a point. “Whatever,” you pushed his arm off. “Still wasn’t necessary.”

“You liked it.”

“No, I didn’t.”

“Yeah, you did.”

“I didn’t.”

“You keep telling yourself that.”

…

Brunch had barely ended. Like, you were given maybe half an hour for the food in your stomach to settle before Changmin decided to have some fun with everyone.

Your phone vibrated. You pulled it out, wondering who was texting you over the weekend. “Min?” You pressed the messages icon. did I just see 10 kissing you

You rolled your eyes. I don’t see how that’s any of your business

His reply was quick. well then bring your business to the basketball court

“Why?” Ten questioned, looking over your shoulder at the text.

A loud blast of music resonated from around the corner. You groaned. “Oh no.”

“What’s going on?” Ten sounded curious and eager.

“It’s this thing Changmin pulls when he’s bored. He entertains himself by making people dance.” The two of you rounded the auditorium and the basketball court near it came into view. Your brother’s generation and everyone below that were gathered around the open cement, music blasting from a couple of speakers.

“He ever do it to you?” Ten’s voice was full of wonder.

You guffawed. “Not since high school. I made his life hell. He’s not going to try anything on me. But,” you pointed at him, “I think you might be his new target.”

Ten only shrugged, a small smile gracing his lips. “I don’t mind.”

The court was loud. At the very least, you appreciated your brother’s efforts to let the kids have fun. Children were children; they needed to release energy. It was sad, though; in a few short years they would also succumb to the stress of their parents’ businesses.

You watched, clapping your hands and cheering as Changmin dragged in his friends and their younger siblings in to dance, regardless of whether they wanted to or not. He had a significant struggle in your cousin’s kid’s case—and then he saw Ten. He let the kid go (thankfully for her) and beckoned to Ten. He politely raised his hand to decline. Minnie’s expression became mischievous and he promptly seized Ten’s arm to pull him in.  The song changed and Ten just stood there, looking uncertain, tapping his foot to the new beat. Oh, this is Taki Taki, you recognized. The beat dropped.

And then your mouth was on the dirty ground as Ten just went off. You weren’t even joking when you said the whole crowd fell silent.

Ten was dancing. Like, not the pathetic dancing most average people did. You meant dancing. Top level dancing. You’ve only seen dancing like this in videos that dance groups posted online. His moved were sharp. Professional. You wondered if he was really trained or if this was raw talent. His normally smiling face was hard, set,  passionate. And this was his freestyle?

Changmin stepped back, awe on his face. The crowd began to cheer Ten on and you saw him blush momentarily before relapsing to his focused face. You had to admit, his focused face was pretty damn hot.

After the chorus beat drop, he relaxed, his moves more fluid and lazy. He locked eyes with you and smirked. You somehow picked your jaw up from off the cement.

“Dude!” Changmin yelled over the music. “You dance? Like, professionally?”

Ten nodded, slightly out of breath. “For a while, yeah.”

Your brother was shaking his head in disbelief. “Damn. Ey, dumbass,” he called out, clearly gesturing to you, “don’t get rid of this guy, yeah?”

“I won’t!” you responded, cupping your hands around your mouth so he could hear better. Ten stumbled back over to you, grinning in sheer satisfaction.  

He spared you a breathless laugh. “I didn’t think they’d like it so much.”

“I didn’t know you danced.” Inwardly, you were like, great, another reason for me to like him.

He shrugged. “Taeyong and I…we were kind of the duo back in the day. He teaches dance at NCity. You ever heard of it? It’s on the other side of the bridge.”

You shook your head. Unfortunately you hadn’t. “You still dance with him?”

“Well, there are a couple others now,” he explained. “We’re in a difficult place right now. Debt. Sort of. Infrastructure isn’t what it used to be. But yeah. I go there on most weekends.”

“Will you take me there someday?”

He stiffened. “You’re serious? You want to see the academy?”

“Yeah. I really do.”

You weren’t sure, but you thought you could see a hint of a smile. “We’ll see.”

…

 Night had fallen.

Most of the people had gathered in the amphitheatre-like stage near the closed auditorium. Since this was the first major product launch (of a totally new product and not an update) that your brother had directly been part of after being promoted to executive, your parents made a big deal of it. Most of the businesspeople and the grown-ups were out here either after putting their kids to bed or seating them quietly beside them. Your father had raised a toast ten minutes prior, old men were making speeches congratulating Changmin, and Ten was nowhere to be seen. Not to mention mosquitos.

You were seated the farthest away, almost hidden in the darkness, just about ready to make your escape, when Mark sidled up to sit next to you.

“I just wanted to apologize,” he muttered, keeping his eyes on the stage. “I was under the impression that he was just a friend you brought along, not your boyfriend. If I’d known…”

“It’s okay,” you reassured, tapping his knee. “Honestly. It’s fine.”

“What I don’t understand,” he continued, “is why our parents tried to set us up?”

“My mother.” You sighed. “She—she doesn’t approve. She’d rather see me get married to a businessman.”

“That’s messed up.” Mark’s voice sounded genuinely apologetic. “I’m really sorry for coming onto you like that, what your boyfriend must have thought…”

“Mark. Listen. It’s fine. You’re a nice guy. Don’t get me wrong.” You patted his arm. “Quit apologizing. And…shouldn’t you be up front?”

He smiled uncertainly, nodding and standing up at last to go back to his seat. As you watched him, a fond sort of smile forming on your lips, your phone buzzed.

It was a message from Ten. Finally. Maybe he’s telling me he’s on his way.

You gaped at the photo attached. It was of you and Mark—barely a minute ago. So he’s around here somewhere. The idiot. The device buzzed again. A text popped up under the photo.

meet me at the cabin

You could barely hide the grin that spread across your face. Glancing around and confirming an all clear, you got to your feet and crept away, hidden in the shadows. You broke into a run as you neared the cabins.

He was waiting for you. You never realized how attractive a loose white t-shirt and jeans looked on a person. He had a flashlight and a smirk on his face and both told you that he was most certainly up to something.

“Hey, babe,” he greeted casually, the term making your stomach clench.

“Don’t call me that,” you mumbled, not really meaning what  you said. He extended his hand to you and you took it, realizing that his hand was sweaty. So he wasn’t as collected as he seemed. One point to you.

“Where are we going?” you asked, eyeing the flashlight warily. He flicked it on and pointed it at the dark outline of the trees a little ways away from the cabins.

“Onward.”

“Hell no!” you cried, doing your best to pull away from him, but he held fast. “I’m not going in there!”

“Why are you afraid?” He grinned. “I’m with you.”

“Unless you can fight a bear, that doesn’t particularly reassure me.” His grip was strong. The dark woods loomed before you; the tiny circle of light that the flashlight provided wasn’t doing much good. Your heels dug into the ground.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” he laughed. “There aren’t any bears in here. If there were, the club wouldn’t exist. You’re just scared of the dark, huh?”

Reluctantly, you allowed yourself to be pulled into the cover of trees, the lights of the cabins and buildings quickly vanishing. You held onto his hand tightly, terrified of what might happen if you lost him. The tiny bulb seemed to be growing brighter in the darkness. Your eyes darted up, hoping to still see the sky, and sure enough, the moon was there, spreading its glow. You relaxed a little.

He kept mumbling nonsensical words of comfort as you both walked on, until the trees ended, the narrow path opening into a wide space, ground sloping down gently until—water?

“Where are we?” you questioned. He sat down on the sandy bank and you imitated him.

“The other side of the lake.” He pointed the flashlight into the distance, to a spot you couldn’t make out. “That’s the dock.” The light must have hit one of the boats there, because you saw a flash of white. He flicked it off, engulfing you in darkness. Oddly enough, you weren’t afraid anymore. “I was bored, sitting here alone. That’s why I texted you.” His voice suddenly changed.

“You were sitting out here alone?” You frowned.

He caught your concern. “I thought you would want to stay there. Since it’s your brother’s celebration and all. And I’m…” he sighed. “I’m not a match for these high-class people.” The undertones in his voice made you worry.

“What do you mean by that?” Your fingers felt around until they found his.

“Do you like him?” he asked abruptly.

Is that what this is all about? “You mean Mark? As a friend, sure, maybe,” you answered. “Not as anything else.” You squeezed his wrist. “He came to apologize. Just a while ago.” You chuckled. “Saying he didn’t know you were my boyfriend and that he’s sorry for trying to hit on me because our moms set us up.”

“Why didn’t you tell him?”

“Tell him what?”

“That I’m not your boyfriend.”

You narrowed your eyes. What’s gotten into him? “Almost everyone thinks we are, anyway. What does it matter?”

“You’re right.” He let out a deep breath. His voice barely audible. “It’s just an act anyway.”

“Hm? What did you say?”

“Nothing. Nothing at all.” He pointed up at the sky. “You know about constellations?”

“You’re not changing the topic, Ten,” you said sternly. A thought just occurred to you. “Wait, were you jealous?” You hung from his shoulder, trying to get him to look at you.

“What? No. Shove off.” He pushed you away. “I was just asking.”

“You were jealous. That’s cute.” You looked up at the stars. “And no, I don’t know anything about constellations. I wish I did, but I can’t remember them.”

“Me neither,” he agreed. “I don’t understand how people can just look at a star and say which one it is. They’re dots in the sky, not, like, dogs or something.”

A comfortable silence fell over you. Just sitting there, staring up at the sky, shoulders and thighs touching. His forefinger tapped a regular rhythm against your kneecap. You realized that your eyes had become adjusted to the dim moonlight.

“I hate you sometimes, you know,” you burst out.

He flinched. A hand rested over his heart. “Wha—that came out of nowhere. Did I do something?”

You waved your hands around. “No. I didn’t mean it that way.”

He relaxed. “Oh. Okay. I see.”

“Like, before I met you?” You continued. “My life was…together; my life was easy. And then you came along and now I’m watching everything fall to pieces around me.”

He sucked in a small breath. “That’s—not really making things better.”

You groaned, pulling your hair. “No! Not like that—ugh. This is why I’d rather write—um, how do I say this?” You thought for a bit and spoke slowly, gathering words. “Before I met you, I…I did things my way. You know? Like, I played by my rules. I made friends that I chose. I studied what I wanted to. I write because I decided to. You get it? When I woke up in the morning…I—I knew what would happen that day. I knew what would happen tomorrow. I had everything under my control, and it—it felt safe, yeah? I felt sure about everything. I was confident. And then you showed up, out of nowhere—“ he shifted around, “—and I didn’t plan that. You pop in and out of my day when you want to. And—and I have no control over all that.”

He nodded. “So I’m your element of surprise.”

“That shouldn’t have existed!” Your voice was getting steadily louder. “I went the next night thinking you weren’t going to be there, but you were, and then you had me anticipating! I opened up to you when I never do, why? I shared that poem—Minnie hasn’t even read it—why? Like, even right now. I wouldn’t have left the place, I would’ve stayed like a good girl, but you call me out and I’m just so fucking ready to come to you! I let you near me! I can’t imagine doing that to anyone else I’d only known a week! But why is it like that?” Your voice dropped to a whisper. “Why you?”

You couldn’t recognize the emotion in his eyes. Was it confusion? Was it apprehension, or fear, or even disgust? Maybe it was sympathy—or worse, pity. So when he opened his mouth, you didn’t expect the sentence that came out of it.

“Maybe we’re meant to be.”

You were glad it was too dark for him to see your blush. “You mean like…soulmates or something? You really believe in all that?”

You watched, stunned, awed, frozen, as his hand came up to brush your hair away from your face. He leaned in closer so his nose was barely a few inches from yours. He glanced at your mouth. “How can I look at you,” he murmured, “and say I don’t believe in soulmates?”

There was a lump in your throat (and tears ready to form in your eyes, but you wouldn’t admit that). You swallowed it down, and when he swayed even closer, you couldn’t help but let your eyelids flutter shut—for a kiss that never came. The heat vanished.

“It’s written in the stars, baby.” His loud proclamation made your eyes snap open. He was sprawled on the ground, arms behind his head and gazing up at you with the cockiest grin that you had ever seen. You pursed your lips and bit your tongue, turning away, wanting more than anything to slap him, but too embarrassed to function. One point to him. Reluctantly.

You felt him tug at the hem of your shirt. “You wanted my kiss so bad, didn’t you? I knew you liked it when I kissed you in the morning.”

You clenched your fists. You hated feeling powerless. “No, I didn’t.”

“Oh, really? Let’s try that again.” He sat up, pressing his face into yours. You could feel his breath on your lips and a jolt of desire shot through you. “Tell me, Y/N,” he whispered, “didn’t you like it?”

You felt yourself unravelling. Heat was building up inside you. His fingertips brushed across your exposed neck, sending tiny shivers down your spine. You released the pressure on your jaw. “Yes.”

He was so close, so close, too close. “Tell me, don’t you want me to kiss you?”

A shaky breath escaped you. He didn’t need a reply, it seemed, because he was pushing himself up fully and his lips were against yours.

You wished you had said no. It was nothing like the sweet, innocent peck he had planted on your mouth at brunch. That was fake, just a ruse to tell Mark to go away.

His tongue swiped against your bottom lip and slid back into his mouth before you could register what happened. His hand gripped the back of your neck and pushed you closer to him.

That was fake, but was this real? Wasn’t this just a show of dominance? Wasn’t this just a way of feeding his ego, telling him that he had this effect on you? Wasn’t this just him trying to get a rise out of you? This wasn’t real. This wasn’t real.

His teeth nipped at your lip and you found that you didn’t care. You gasped, lips parting, the heat of the kiss rising in a heartbeat.

He was the one who pulled away first, and you weren’t as mad as you could have been to see him unaffected while you were trying in vain to catch your breath. He didn’t move away, though, so his lips were still just in front of yours.

He drew in air, as if he was about to say something. “You taste like spaghetti.”

What?

“Oh my god, you’re insufferable!” You spat, shoving him forcefully onto his back, seizing the flashlight and getting to your feet. “I am leaving you!” Flicking the damn thing on, you tried to calm your heart, feeling humiliated beyond words. Another point to him, the bastard. How does he do it? You hadn’t gone two paces before his voice reached you.

“You don’t know the way back.”

“The earth is round, isn’t it?” you snapped, face hot. “I’ll end up somewhere.”

…

 You wanted to stay mad at him. You really wanted to. But by the time both of you were out of the woods, you were—well, out of the woods. You couldn’t stay mad at him. You didn’t dare say anything to Ten in front of Changmin before you went to bed, but you had several questions for Yeonhee. Changmin never let you interact with her if he could help it. Probably scared that you would do something to embarrass him. Smart. But you got the chance now.

“Is Changmin a good boss?” you questioned her, curious, rolling around childishly on your bed. She smiled gently at your antics.

“He is. He cares about his employees a lot.” You smirked at her answer.

“One particular employee more than others?”

Pink tinted her cheeks. “I—pardon?”

“I’ll cut to the chase.” You rolled onto your stomach, facing her. “Do you like him? Are you two, like, together yet?”

She brought her hand up to cover her face, fanning herself. “What—what gives you that idea?”

You rolled your eyes. “Come on, unnie, don’t lie. You like him, don’t you?”

She paused, probably debating whether it would be good for her health if she confessed her undying love for Changmin to his little sister. “I think so.”

You squealed, giddy. “Has either of you said anything?”

She threw a pillow at you. “You be quiet! Don’t go running around telling anybody!”

You caught the pillow and tossed it back. “But he likes you, too? So what’s the problem?”

Her face turned sour. “I’ll tell you what’s the problem. It’s the same problem you have.”

Oh. Oh. “Ma.” You propped your head up with the heel of your palm. “She’s such a nightmare.”

Yeonhee nodded. “You should see everyone’s faces when she shows up for the board meetings.”

You giggled. “Things will work out. I’m sure of it. If I can pull it off, so can you.”

She chuckled, pulling her blanket over herself. “I hope so, Y/N. I hope so.”

…

The next morning, you managed to get up early. The air was crisp and cold, and though showering was a bitch, it woke you up well and good. Yeonhee woke up hearing your hopeless voice filtering through the bathroom door, poor thing. Leaving her to get ready in peace, you let yourself in next door.

“Where’s Ten?” you asked your brother, taking a seat beside him on the little patio thing out back. He sipped from a cup, the wonderful aroma of coffee slapping you in the face. From where you sat, you had a pretty good view of the open ground where food was being set.

“Bathroom.”

You hummed, sitting back in your chair and focusing on the children playing around the tables, their laughter and smiles suddenly all you could see. You didn’t realize the corners of your mouth had turned upward until Changmin spoke.

“You look happy.”

You took a minute to digest his sentence, and then you were surprised at it. “I am,” you said, awed. “I am happy.”

“That’s good.” He reached out to ruffle your hair (‘hey, stop it’). “I like seeing you happy. Is it...Ten?”

You coughed. “What?”

He seemed in a contemplative mood. “It’s Ten, isn’t it? That’s why you’re so happy, right?” You didn’t know how to respond in a way that wouldn’t betray your growing feelings. So you remained silent. “I know it’s not real, but—don’t let go of him, yeah? Even if it doesn’t work out, or…stay friends or something. Yeah? He’s good for you.”

An ache ripped through your chest at his words. He was right. It wasn’t real. It was all an act that you would have to give up at some point. And, even though you wouldn’t admit it to Changmin, you had gotten attached. “I didn’t know you cared so much.”

“I care about my sister,” he responded sharply. “And I’m not willingly going to lose someone who makes my sister happy.” He placed his fingers at the corners of your mouth and pushed up. “Smile, kiddo. You look better with it.”

The bathroom door opened.

“Hey, Y/N. I thought I heard voices.” You twisted in your chair and regretted it at once. His thin t-shirt stuck to his body, patches of darkening fabric forming from residual water droplets. And his hair—damn, the wet-hair thing was real, huh? He looked fantastic. Rubbing his towel lazily through his damp locks, he came over to you both. “So what’s the plan for today, bro?”

Before Changmin could answer, you cut in. “Bro? Seems like you both got some brother-in-law bonding time, huh?”

“Sure did.” Ten messed up your hair, just after you had fixed it again (‘yah!’).

“I thought the grandpas and grannies could kick back and we could take the kids down to the lake,” your brother suggested. “Jae-ho was pestering me about it yesterday.” You brightened at the idea.

“Sounds cool,” Ten said casually, sniffing the air. “What’s that smell?” He looked down at the both of you, spotting the mug in your brother’s palm. “Coffee?!”

…

 “Come on, unnie! You want the boys to win?” Da-eun, your cousin’s daughter screeched, pulling on your arms, totally upset at possibly losing the race to the lake. You, however, had just noticed two things: one, Ten was missing again, and two, Mark was clearly chatting up a girl over by the amphitheatre and you couldn’t help but smile.

You let go of her hand and told her, “Unnie’s getting old. Why don’t you run ahead? Make those boys lose.” She flung your arm away and took off after her older brother Jae-ho. You straightened up, still staring at Mark and the unknown girl until he noticed you. You grinned, flashing him a thumbs-up and he blushed, looking away.

Amused, you broke into a jog to catch up with the kids and your brother.

The wood and stone dock extended out a good twenty metres into the lake. Speedboats and canoes were anchored off to one side. On the other side were steps.

“Cannonball!” Jae-ho was yelling as you reached, jumping off the dock into the water below. You laughed as the water splashed in all directions, drenching your brother and the two other boys with him. Da-eun ran to you as you approached, evidently tired of the testosterone already. The look on her face told you that she was a tiny bit afraid to jump into the water like that, so you led her over to the steps that led down the dock into the water. Changmin followed you, nearly pushing you in when you tried to sit on the steps.

“Stop it, fu—jerk,” you scolded him, making the boys laugh at their hyung. Offended, he began to tickle them, picking them up and tossing them into the water over their screams. Jae-ho swam over to where all of you were. At twelve years old, he was already skilled at swimming, as you knew from your cousin bragging about his medals. Da-eun, only six, was much more hesitant. You watched her cute little self bounce on the submerged step before sitting there, water covering her legs. She shivered.

“Come on, Da-eun, don’t be a baby,” Jae-ho teased mercilessly. Their dynamic reminded you so much of you and your brother.

Da-eun certainly was not about to be mocked. She cautiously picked herself up. Changmin, who had jumped in, opened his arms, beckoning her forward. Reassured at the support, she pushed off from the step, propelling straight into his chest. He gathered her up and shook her, forcing giggles out of her. You chose not to get in. You didn’t have anything else to wear and you just weren’t in the mood to get wet so early in the morning.

“Where’s Ten?” Changmin asked, just noticing his absence, pulling Da-eun onto his shoulders.

“I’m wondering the same thing.” You propped your elbow on your knee.

“Dad’s looking for him.”

“Oh no,” you whined. “Can’t he give it a rest?”

“You know you can just tell him it’s a lie, right?”

“You know you can just shut that hole in your face, right?”

“Ouch.” He shook Da-eun’s legs. “You see how mean she is to me?”

You giggled.

It was fun, you had to admit. You never thought interacting with kids could be anything but exhausting, but sometimes, they were nice. Only sometimes.

“Aishhh!” you yelped as Jae-ho splashed water on you. “Yah!” You made a move to get up, and he dashed to Changmin’s side, hiding behind him. Oh, so he knew his only ally would be your brother.

“Yah? Who are you disrespecting, huh?” Changmin shouted, playing along. Okay. If they’re gonna play that way, you were too. Standing up and sprinting over to the shore, you scooped up some sand and ran back, flinging it at his face. Jae-ho had wisely abandoned his ‘ally’. Changmin spluttered and batted the incoming missiles away as best he could, but you were satisfied that you had won this battle.

You didn’t even realize how the time had flown.

“Hey, kids!” A voice called out. “And Changminnie hyung, too, I suppose. It’s lunch time.”

Ten. What the hell has he been?

“Oi, Ten!” your brother greeted crudely. His words were drowned out, however, by the kids erupting at the announcement of lunch being served. Changmin was unceremoniously dragged out of the water by the four demon-children.

You turned to him as he sat next to you. Wordlessly, he passed you a juice box, presumably that he nicked from the mess stalls.

“Where were you?” you asked, pouting. He stabbed the box with the straw and sucked at it hard.

“I had to pee, jeez.” The annoying sound of suctioning air filled your ears. “Can’t you manage even a minute without me?” You smacked his arm, deciding to stab your own juice box.

“Hey, I saw Mark,” you suddenly remembered. His face fell.

“Yeah?”

“Yah, quit being so jealous, I told you I don’t like him that way. What I was saying was I think he found someone else. He was being pretty close to a girl.”

The corner of his mouth lifted. “Good for him.” You were amused at his aloofness. He clearly didn’t care nor want to know about Mark.

“Come on, then,” you said, standing up. “Let’s eat lunch.”

He followed. “How come you didn’t get in the water?”

You shrugged. “Didn’t feel like getting wet.”

He shot you a creepy smile. “Oh, really?” Still maintaining eye contact, he hollowed his cheeks and sucked his juice.

You promptly pushed him back into the water, clothes, juice box and all. His fall was almost in slow motion, limbs flailing about and terror on his face as he submerged. You laughed shamelessly at him when he resurfaced, gasping for breath and wiping water and hair out of his eyes. You didn’t stay a moment longer. You knew better. You ran.

“Yah! You get back here!”

His yells fell on empty air. Serves him right. One more point to you. Finally.

…

 The campfire that night was a spectacle.

It was always like that, wasn’t it? When people of an older generation got together, they would talk about memories. They would sing songs that were popular back when they were children. And it was fascinating to watch them let go of their stress and problems and become young again.

A fire roared in the centre. People gathered around it on wooden benches. Kids sat on the ground or ran around playing tag. Once every fifteen minutes, someone would throw something at the fire to make it blaze higher.

For the most part, you watched them. Some of the songs you were familiar with, and you sang along to them. You were glad Ten was with you, sitting right beside you, bodies pressed together. You restrained yourself from resting your head on his shoulder, to make a show in front of your mother.

Even here, surrounded by laughter and singing and happiness, you couldn’t help but constantly think  about what would happen in the morning. The weekend would be over, taking the retreat with it. Ten would leave. You would go your separate ways. After all, business was business. And now, you weren’t sure you wanted that. It wasn’t because of the lack of immunity from your mother’s plans. It wasn’t even because of the prospect of coming clean to your father and seeing his hurt that you lied. It was simply because you would miss him. Even just his presence. You weren’t sure if you were ready for that.

You looked up at him, for once not distracted by his jawline. He looked so soft and ethereal, the flickering light of the fire falling on his face; sparks flying in the night background only emphasized it. Tiny beads of sweat dotted his forehead.

But why were you so reluctant to let him go? You met him literally a week ago!

He sensed your eyes on him and turned his gaze onto you. Your faces were hardly a couple inches apart. He smiled gently at you, no teasing. Your heart ached. As if he could tell you were hurting, his fingers found yours in the dark, unseen by anyone else. You averted your eyes from his intense gaze—any longer and you might cry.

The only explanation you could find for your feelings was that, in just a week, he had become a sort of emotional pillar—with no one else to catch you, he had. And now you weren’t ready for the fall anymore.

In the midst of the chaos, your phone vibrated in your jacket pocket and you jumped, startled. Quickly pulling it out, you checked the message you had just received. It was from…Dad? You narrowed your eyes, worried. Dad never texted you if he could help it.

It was an audio message. Pretty long. You couldn’t hear a thing here. You glanced around the campfire, but he was nowhere to be seen. It had to be important.

“I’ll be right back,” you whispered in Ten’s ear, getting to your feet. He grasped your wrist. He seemed concerned, a question in his features. Should I come with you? Your expression was clear. I’ll be fine. He nodded, releasing his grip on you.

You stepped over the children and around the benches, jogging to the peace around the cabins. Pulling out your earphones, you plugged it into your phone. You pressed play.

“…her classmate, am I correct?”

You were confused. That was your Dad’s voice, wasn’t it? Silence. You strained to hear, increasing the volume.

“…I respect you very much, sir—“ you gasped. Ten? Your Dad talked to him, then? “—as a businessman, but more so as her father. So I’m not going to lie to you.”

Wait. What?

You heard a sigh. Was he actually going to tell your father that you weren’t—

“I’m not her boyfriend.”

Fuck.

“I’m not her classmate, either.”

Double fuck.

“I’m just a broke engineer in need of a job who jumped at the thought of making a little money. I was desperate.”

You didn’t want to know how heartbroken your father must have been. Hadn’t he asked you specifically if Ten was after your money?

“But, sir—I don’t see it the way you’re thinking. Because…the first time I saw her? on a bridge, looking ready to jump off. Just a girl with problems she refused to tell me. I didn’t see money. I didn't see a price over her head. She was just a girl who wanted comfort but didn’t know how to ask for it.”

Your breath hitched. Tears pricked at your eyes.

“…But I was still broke and turned down thrice, so…when she came to me asking me if I would come with her to a party for pay, I accepted it. I thought it was the smart thing to do. But—“ a frustrated noise sounded in your ears. “I didn't—I didn’t bargain for this.”

“Bargain for what?”

There was a long silence. “Your daughter is so beautiful, sir. So beautifully broken. She can’t speak, so she writes. And that expresses what she means far better than anyone could explain. She’s just a girl who wants to live and feel and she’s—no offence, sir—she’s stuck in a place where she can’t. And I can see it, sir. I can see what she’s trying to say, deep down. She’s not closed off, or stuck up, or arrogant, or anything—not when you learn to understand her.”

You closed your eyes, a tear running down your cheek.

“…What I’m trying to say is, it’s not about the money, sir. Not anymore. I—“

A hand on your shoulder. You flinched, caught by surprise. You swivelled around.

Ten stood before you, confusion and worry etched on his face. You heard a muffled ‘are you okay’ fall from his lips. You broke down, falling into his arms, tears flowing freely now. An earbud dropped out of one of your ears.

“You didn’t come back, so I came out here looking for you,” you heard him say. “What’s going on—what are you listening to?”

He pushed you away from him to see your stained face. Wordlessly, you lifted an earbud to his ear.

“—when or how it happened—“ his expression morphed into shock, fear almost, “—I think I fell in love with her.”

The recording ended.

He couldn’t seem to look you in the eye. “Y/N, I’m sorry if—“

You cut him off, yanking on his shirt and crashing your lips onto his. He made a noise of surprise, but kissed you back fervently. Your arms snaked up to hook around his neck, and his hands gripped your hips, squeezing lightly. A strangled sort of noise emerged from the back of your throat, much to your embarrassment. You kissed again and again, not separating more than a second for a gasp of air. It was when the earbuds fell out of both of your ears that you broke apart.

He looked so disoriented. “Y/N—“

“Idiot,” you snarled. “You’re such a fucking idiot.”

“I—damn, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know he was recording—was it a bad idea to tell him the truth?”

You stared at him, your chest heaving, a million thoughts shooting through your brain, too stunned to do more than what you just did.

So you kissed him again.

…

BANG!

The sound of your cabin door slamming shut echoed throughout the room. You were sure that the entire club must have heard it, but you couldn’t care less. Not when Ten was kissing you like that.

Your back hit the closed door, his hands on your hips pushing you roughly against it. Your head throbbed where it hid the wood, but you barely noticed. You felt one of his hands leave your waist and feel around. The click of a lock.

Your fingers found the hem of his shirt and they slipped under it. He let out a groan against your lips that had arousal shooting through you. His skin was hot under your fingertips.

“Just fucking—take it off,” he growled, his mouth still unrelenting. You obeyed, blindly fumbling for the buttons and nimbly undoing them. When you got through the last one, your hands wandered freely across his chest. He grunted, shrugging the damn thing off his shoulders so it pooled on the floor at his feet. You pulled away from his lips to draw air, but he didn’t seem to want to. He moved to a side, pressing open-mouthed kisses to your jaw and your neck. You could feel his breath on your skin and you outright moaned.

“Ten—“ you cut yourself off when his teeth grazed your collarbone, breath caught in your throat. His hands felt under your shirt, running up your sides and you shivered at the cold. “Ten!” No. Wait, wait, wait, what are we doing? “Ten, stop. Stop.” His hands fell to his sides and he stood up straight, looking at you anxiously.

“What—did I hurt you?” He panicked.

“No, you didn’t hurt me,” you assured, breathless. “It’s just—I don’t think I’m ready for…” You trailed off, suddenly shy.

“Huh?” He threw you a smirk, running a hand through his sweaty hair. “What are you talking about? I brought you in here to make out. What were you thinking?”

You smacked his bare chest. “Idiot.” You couldn’t stop the blush that spread across your cheeks.

He chuckled, eyes flickering to your lips. “Shut up and let me kiss you.”

…

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

Both of you were lying comfortably in bed, wrapped around each other. Your head rested on his chest, content and happier than you had been in a long time. His arm drawing you near made you feel safe.

He didn’t reply right away, fiddling with the sleeve of your shirt. “How was I supposed to know you liked me back?”

“Irrelevant.”

“How? You literally brought me here promising pay. For all I knew, I was still just convenient for you. Just a guy to shield you from other people.”

“You really thought that?” You pinched him.

“Ow!” he slapped your hand away. “Until yesterday I did.”

“What made you change your mind?”

He took a deep breath. “Friday night when you said that poem you wrote? I thought maybe you were opening up to me, but then that night you didn’t answer my messages so then I thought you were regretting it or something.” He paused. “But yesterday night, I realized I meant something to you. I just didn’t know what I meant.”

“I feel like I’m just taking advantage of you,” you murmured. “Like I only keep you around so you can understand what I’m trying to say and sympathize.”

“What?” he sounded surprised. “If anything, I should feel that way. I talk about my problems more than you ever did.”

“Hm.” Your eyes were already drooping. You didn’t have much energy left to form words.

“Tired?”

You nodded. He laughed under his breath.

“Go to sleep, then. Goodnight.”

…

 they tell me, it’s called serendipity

finding something you weren’t trying to see

a four leaf clover, a penny

just a bit of luck, you see?

but we?

was it a game of chance? or was it meant to be?

didn’t you know from the day we met?

it’s written in the stars

they haven’t lost hope in us yet

tell me this is real

all I know, all I feel

you make me happier than I could ever be

fate works her magic

on you

and on me

it’s called serendipity

what led me to you, and led you to me

our story was in the stars, and in the stars it will be

no longer a stranger

where did you come from? where will you go?

hush, don’t tell me

my heart already knows.

…

  “Leaving so soon?”

Changmin’s voice floated towards us.

“Ah, hyung, good morning,” Ten greeted. “I really have to go. Congratulations again.”

You watched them, a smile dancing across your lips. His eyes darted to your intertwined fingers, but he didn’t comment.

“By the way, here’s my card.” Changmin pulled one of his business cards out of his pocket and handed it to Ten. “Interview’s on Wednesday. I expect you to be there.”

“In—interview?” Ten choked out. He turned to me. “You told him? I thought I said not to!”

Wait, why is this blame falling on you? “I didn’t tell him anything!”

“Dad told me,” your brother clarified. “So. You better show up.”

Ten was speechless. “I—thank you. I don’t know—“

“Oi.” Changmin cut him off. “I didn’t give you the job yet. If I’m not impressed, I’ll still reject you. Brother in law or not.”

Ten nodded. “Understood. I won’t let you down, hyung.”

Changmin grinned fondly at him, ruffling his hair. “I hope so.”

…

 This was it. For now. Ten’s apartment building loomed in front of you like a prison ready to take him away, back to his life. You didn’t want to let go of his hand as he bounced up the stairs. On the last flight of steps before levelling out onto his floor, you stopped. He looked back at you, puzzled.

You drew in a breath, taking out a piece of paper from your pocket. “I think I still owe something.” He recognized what you were holding. A cheque. Fifty thousand, as promised. His face fell.

“No. Y/N. Come on,” he said seriously. “I can’t take that from you. Not anymore. Drop it, okay? You don’t owe me anything.”

“I made a promise, Ten.” You forced his hand open and shoved the cheque into his palm. “If you don’t want it, give it to the academy. You all need it more than I do.”

His shock was apparent. “You’re joking.”

“I’m not.”

He stood there stunned for a moment, before rushing to you and pulling you into a bear hug. You relished the warmth he radiated. Rubbing your back, he mumbled, “Thank you so much.”

“Well, well, what do we have here?”

Ten’s roommate’s voice had you jumping apart. He sat on the top step, chin in his palms, watching us like a movie.

“Hyung, for fuck’s sake,” Ten chided.

You knew your time here was up. “I should be getting home. I’ll see you at the company, Ten.” You leaned up to kiss his cheek delicately. “Don’t expect any special treatment for dating the boss’ sister, yeah?” You giggled, swiftly turning away and jogging down the stairs. As you retreated, you could hear Taeyong spluttering in shock.

“What does that mean?!”

…

You exited the building, the wind catching your hair. The sun was high and bright in the blue sky (well partly blue). The trees were multi-coloured and gorgeous. You never seemed to notice just how beautiful the world really was, and it could only get even more so. Winter was fast approaching, but in your heart, spring flowers were already blooming. You lifted your eyes to the heavens, in a silent word of thanks.

Even though Changmin wasn’t there to see it, you smiled.

…

it’s called serendipity

and it’s written in the stars

now

and forever

I will never be too far

……

 Epilogue—

 “Come on, guys, let’s take it from the top.” Ten clapped his hands for attention, walking over to the stereo set to rewind the song playing. “Alright! You ready?”

“Yes, hyung!” Six eager but tired voices answered. He snickered. It was Friday and all of them were exhausted from a week’s practice. He pressed play.

“Five, six, seven, eight!” Ten counted the beat, going through the motions along with the boys. “Up, then down, then bam, bam, bam! Good! Okay, keep going!”

The boys preened at the praise, carefully executing the steps Taeyong had painstakingly choreographed. Ten walked around the room, correcting their movements and showing them a simpler way of doing the same step, with less effort.

A knock at the door caused him to stop, confused and a little irritated. He stopped the music and went to the door. “Who’s—“

His jaw dropped.

“Hey, baby,” you greeted him, pecking his lips and letting yourself into the practice room.

Ten stood there, frozen, fingers touching his lips and smiling to himself. Your arrival had taken him completely by surprise.

“Noona!” A chorus of happy noises followed their greeting. You knelt on the floor as Jisung raced into your arms for a hug. Out of the boys in the class, he was the youngest, at only four and a half years old, and by far the most attached to you.

“Hey guys. Hey Jisungie,” you said, wrapping your arms around the little boy and manoeuvring both of you so you were sitting and he was in your lap. He seemed to burrow himself closer to you.

You heard Ten’s footsteps approach you. “I thought you weren’t coming back until Monday.”

“I thought I would surprise you,” you replied smoothly. “I went to the office but they said you took a day off.”

“Hm. Yeah.” He knelt beside you. “Taeyong’s sick, so he asked me to cover for him today. Tomorrow’s my day to come in anyway.”

You knew this conversation was boring for the boys, so you changed the topic. “Hey, guys, I have a surprise for you!” Reaching back secretly into your backpack, you pulled out (with some difficulty) two boxes of assorted chocolates. ‘Wahh’s and cheering ensued. You set the boxes down in front of you and all the boys gathered around it. Knowing Jisung wouldn’t be getting much without a fight, you helped them tear open one box and showed it to him. “Which one do you want, Jisungie?” He shyly picked up a round piece of chocolate and popped it into his mouth.

“Haechan, don’t make so much noise!” Ten hissed at the boy making screeching sounds in delight. “Classes are still going on!” He looked at you longingly, wanting nothing more than to talk to you—alone. “Guys, take a break. I’ll be right back, okay?” You lifted Jisung off your lap and set him on the floor, adjusting his hair. “Don’t start fighting. And share!”

You giggled as he dragged you out of the room towards the staff room at the end of the hall.

“Jisung’s gotten taller since I last saw him,” you remarked. His expression softened.

“He really has. He’s gonna end up taller than any of them, you see.”

The academy had flourished significantly since the day you first set foot in it up to now. A fresh coat of blue was painted on the walls. The training rooms fit mirrors into their walls. Students were pouring in.

Once inside the staff room, he pulled you into a needy hug, holding you tight. “I missed you.”

“I was only away for a week, Ten.”

“It wasn’t a week. It was nine days. That’s too long.” You could practically hear the pout in his voice. “How was the trip anyway?”

You set your backpack on the table and hopped up onto it. He pried your knees apart and stood between them. Your arms rested on his shoulders. “It was beautiful. I never knew London was such a pretty place. I want to go there with you someday.”

“Maybe we can. Did the editors say anything about your manuscript?” He looked so hopeful.

You shrugged. “They liked it.”

“And?”

“Hmm.” You acted mysterious. “They might have agreed to publish it.”

“What?!” he shouted, shaking you in glee. “You’re serious?!”

“I am,” you answered, laughing at his expression, scarcely noticing the bell going off.

“That’s amazing, baby. I’m proud of you.”

You leaned in to kiss him. He sighed, as if he had been so deprived of your lips for the past week. Your fingers pulled at his hair.

“What the—oh.”

You broke apart, seeing that Jaehyun had walked inside and stopped short, looking disgusted. He forced a smile. “Hey, Y/N. You’re back?”

Ten reluctantly stepped away from you as you dug around in your backpack for Jaehyun’s gift.

“Chocolates?” he asked, face lighting up. Chocolate really was universal. “Thanks!”

“Don’t I get a gift?” Ten whined as Jaehyun went to eat his lunch in a corner.

You tugged him closer to whisper in his ear. “I don’t think I can give you your gift in public.”

He inhaled sharply, glancing at Jae to see if he heard anything. “Do me a favour. Keep your mouth shut until I can send these boys home, okay?”

“Mmm,” you hummed, drawing him in for another kiss. Before he could deepen it, he suddenly pitched forward, your teeth clashing. The clang of metal reverberated in the room.

“Ow!” Ten cried, rubbing the back of his head. You spotted the missile on the floor. A spoon. “What the heck, Jae?”

“Not in front of my lunch, for fuck’s sake. You guys are gross.” Jae scrunched up his nose.

Ten threw him a nasty look but complied, leading you outside.

“He’s bitter,” Ten explained. “Broke up three days ago.”

“Ouch.” You sympathized. Ten hugged you again, not able to function without you anymore. You let him. His warmth was a welcome change after the cold hotel room you had stayed at in London. You were content. Life was good. A loud yelp from the classroom brought Ten’s attention back to his boys.

“I should really go and stop them before they cover the floor in chocolate.” He shook his head. “I don’t know why you thought giving them sugar was a good idea.” He made a move toward the door, but you grabbed his arm.

“Wait,” you said. “I have to ask you something.” He nodded for you to continue. “Well, you know Minnie’s getting married next month, right? They expect me to bring someone along.” You smiled mischievously. “So…”

“Will you be my date?”

…

 I am the sweat

beading on your forehead

and the pounding of your heart

I am the madness

that fills your mind

and threatens to tear you apart

let me kiss your lips dry

and breathe life into your veins

let me make love to you

until your eyes can’t stay awake

can you ever look

at the bruises on my heart

and say you mean nothing to me?

darling, it’s written in the stars

and they call it serendipity.

_

fin.

#nct #wayv #ten #nct ten #wayv ten #ten chittapon #nct scenarios #wayv scenarios #nct masterlist #wayv masterlist #nct imagines #wayv imagines #nct taeyong #nct mark #nct jaehyun #nct jisung #nct haechan #tvxq changmin #tvxq yunho #kpop #kpop imagines #kpop scenarios #love #life #fluffy #angst #suggestive #nct smut #wayv smut #escort!au

[thewildwaffle]

Abduction - Chapter 17

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Wenona pointed out that the guards were still there, they had just fallen back in order to try to stay mostly out of sight. Mostly. It was still made perfectly clear that they were very much being guarded. Mike stared at the doorway where he knew they were lurking just around the corner. They'd been there a while. They'd been following them all day, or solar rotation, or, argh, whatever!

He felt exhausted. Physically and mentally.

The worst place had been the infirmary.

At first, it was very hospital-like and normal. It reminded Mike a lot of the medical wing he and Wenona had lived in while aboard the Gladius. They used equipment that was, more or less, the same as what Demfar and Gerben used to to scan, analyze and heal the remainders of their wounds. The cuts from Simmo's knife on his tanned arms had been scabbing and looked like they'd leave nasty scars. After a few passes of the machine, his arm was almost as good as new. There were still faint scars, but they were only noticeable to him because he knew where to look for them.

The medics were… friendly. It was like Demfar times two. But not necessarily in a good way. They wanted to know everything about humans. Or rather, they wanted to hear about humans from humans. They, like Demfar, had read up and done as much research as they could, but that was very different than having two live specimens in front of you. They questioned, poked, prodded relentlessly until Wenona finally got fed up. The medic ended up splayed out on all six limbs on the floor.

The guards had rushed in, clawed hands on blaster hilts. The medics shooed them away, assuring them that everything was fine. They remained curious from a more cautious distance after that.

That part of the infirmary, as fun as that had been, was fine. It was as they were leaving that they walked by a large room whose occupants made both him and Wenona stop in their tracks.

The room was similar to the one they'd just been in, but it was filled with gurneys and platforms filled with various alien shapes.

They weren't moving. At all.

Mike's heart started pounding as he realized he recognized a few of the shapes. There was a group of squifra near the middle of the room. They had Confederation uniforms on. One in particular stood out. It had camouflage patterns of browns and purple's on its skin. It looked so much like Demfar. It couldn't be Demfar, though, right?

Another alien, closer to them caught his eye, furry and cat-shaped. It's fur was the color of dark gray, like the remains of a fire that had gone out. It couldn't be… it couldn't be Thurrin, could it? Please no.

The guards ushered them away from the room, but not before they also saw a few Sefra. They looked so much like Jeb. There were also many, many species of aliens he didn't recognize, in various uniforms, colors, sashes. As Mike followed the guards from the room- the morgue, he realized now what was, he caught eyes with Wenona. They had solved the mystery of why they hadn't seen any bodies in the debris outside. He was sick and horrified by it. He'd seen a body before, at his great aunt's funeral, but this... this was radically different. These could be the remains of his friends, killed by enemies, and blasted into the cold vacuum of space.

At least they hadn't been left there.

How many from the Gladius were in that room? Or in another room like it?

Mike was so lost in thoughts, that he almost jumped when he felt Wenona’s hand on his shoulder. He looked back. Her eyes looked the same way he felt.

“Mike,” she whispered, “are… are you okay?”

No. No he wasn’t. She wasn’t either, but neither of them said so. Instead, Wenona reached out and pulled him into her arms. He hugged back. The two of them stood there, in a beautiful hallway outside a terrifying room on an alien ship, far from home or anything familiar.

There are different kinds of hugs one can give or receive. Brief hugs one gives to friends or family member when you greet them. Awkward side hugs one gives to a coworker, or an acquaintance from that activity where you helped them with something but you barely remember. There are hugs that one gives to a loved one when saying goodbye, or the kind after seeing them when they return from being away a long time. Etc. But there is one special kind of hug that few really know how to give. It’s the one where you’re held tightly in strong arms and you can almost feel that your cracks and broken pieces are being pushed back together.

Those are the best.

The thing about that kind of hug is that they take time to really get the full effect. That was time Mike and Wenona didn’t really have.

Unsure of what the heck was going on, the guards stood around watching the two humans hold each other. What were they doing? Should they break them apart? Was it possible to break them apart at this point? That appeared to be quite a hold they had on each other. The guards looked at the humans and around at each other. Maybe this was a normal human thing?

Sensing the growing unease of the guards, Wenona let go and they both turned to face forward down the hall. A few of the guards’ narrow faces tilted sideways. One was trying and failing to hide what looked like might be a grin.

Ooookay. Mike and Wenona glanced at each other in the corners of their eyes. “So,” Mike started slowly, “are we off then?”

The next location thankfully, was a short trek around the corridors and down one level.

If Mike had been asked to describe a stereotypical lab from the movies, he probably would have described the room they were now standing in pretty well. It was very well-lit and looked clean, if a little cluttered with data pads, strips of strange fabric, weird metal boxes, and scraps of what looked might have once been rubber bands. Really big rubber bands. There were multi-colored fluids bubbling in strange glass vials, vats, and straws of various sizes. There were coils and wires spread out in every direction running between machines he could only guess the purposes of.

The wall just to the right of the entrance they’d come in was almost completely covered with screens and displays. A large, tan, four-armed alien was bent over entering data, looking back and forth between its many large fingers typing at insanely fast speeds and a small wooden object sitting on the table next to them. It looked like - was that a ukulele? No, it had too many strings. Where did they get a tiny guitar?

The guard next to Mike stepped forward and made a quick series of clicking noises. The other alien didn’t look up, but grunted a low tone as if to acknowledge them. Without stopping from typing, it used a spare arm to lift up what looked like a half-helmet, half-headband device covered with movable lenses and visors on its head.

The guard that had stepped forward before sighed and looked a bit exasperated before making the fast clicking sound again, a little louder. “Drin, if you could spare a moment, we’ve brought the humans as requested by Commander Rozar.”

“Wait. What?” the scientist or whatever “Drin” was looked up sharply, the spectacled headgear nearly flew off their head. It sat precariously on top of his brow, dangling on one of the long curved horns protruding from the alien’s forehead. He stood like that, gaping at Mike and Wenona before finally righting his headgear and closing his gaping mouth.

“I thought someone was going to let me know when they were coming!” “Apologies, Drin. We thought you’d been informed. We’ve just come from the medical wing,” the guard bowed again as Drin stepped toward them, muttering under his breath about ruined welcome plans and first impressions.

The scientist stopped a few feet in front of them and frowned at the group. “I assume they’re in full health then?” The main guard nodded. “Good. You’re excused.”

“Sir?” The guards shuffled uneasily.

“You’re excused. Get out of here. I have work to do.”

“Sir, we were told to stay close by and guard the humans. They are dangerous. They’ve already proved to be quite a handful, we’ve been ordered to stay and make sure they-”

Drin straightened his back, showing off his impressively tall stance. “I’m sure I’ll be able to manage.I don’t give much of a gregunian’s left beak who ordered you to do what. This is my lab, and I give the orders here. Now get out. You can wait in the hall if you must.” Slowly, the guards filed back out the door, which shut promptly after the last one’s tail cleared the doorway. Drin turned back to Mike and Wenona and studied them a moment. They studied him back. He stood about eight feet tall and was covered in short, soft-looking tan fur. The curved horns protruding from his forehead were ridged and ended just behind where his long floppy ears started.

“If I’m going to be totally honest with the two of you, you are not at all what I was expecting.”

Mike felt his face scrunch up, but also couldn’t help but give a confused smile, “Uh, okay. Sorry, I guess?”

Now it was Drin’s turn to look confused, “Sorry? Sorry for what? This is amazing! Do you have any idea how long I’ve been waiting to get some actual humans in my lab?” He obviously meant it as a rhetorical question, because he immediately turned to grab a handful of instruments off a nearby table and turn back to them. One tool turned out to essentially be a fancy measuring tape.

Wenona, glared at Drin as he came closer to measure her, “The medics already took all our measurements. Can’t you just get all that from them?”

He ignored the look she was giving him and started measuring her height, length of her arms, circumference of her head, etc. “I suppose I could, but I’d prefer to make accurate catalogs. I don’t mean to offend the buffoons they hired in the medical wing, but they’re complete imbeciles.” He pulled a strand of Wenona’s hair straight up and measured it as well.

After a few more measurements, and after Wenona slapped him away when she’d finally had enough, it was Mike’s turn.

“So,” Mike started, holding up his arm or turning as needed, “you said we weren’t what you were expecting? What did you mean?”

“Hmm? Oh yes,” Drin finished and replaced the tool to the table which began uploading its measurements to the datapad next to it. “Your race’s reputation has spread remarkably fast, even through the blockade. I suppose that by the time we heard of you, pure information devolved into rumors and exaggerations. After hearing about many of the habitats earth offers, and some of the feats your kind has supposedly accomplished, I thought you would be shorter and stockier, maybe with more fur if you’d come from cold climates. Would you say that your builds are typical of humankind?”

Mike and Wenona looked at each other. Mike nodded, “Yeah, we’re both pretty average height-wise I guess. I’ve always been the tallest in my classes though, but I’m certainly no pro-basketball player or anything.”

Drin obviously had no idea what that meant, but he looked delighted to hear it anyway.

“I can see how the rumors started though. After your planet defeated the Kahsks, it’d be easy to embellish and exaggerate about a race capable of such a feat. The Kahsks made a mistake invading your planet. Well, it was a mistake for them, obviously, but for many of the rest of us, it was something akin to an opening door. New opportunities!” Drin paused to motion the two of them towards a large machine bolted to the side of another table. Wenona held back a bit nervously. Mike stepped forward as Drin had him hold his arms out straight a few inches from his sides. The machine began scanning Mike with a bright green light.

Drin watched the readouts on a screen on the other side of the scanner as he continued, “The Burnti Empire and the Kahsks have had a long history of… rivalry I guess could be one word for it. When we found out they’d been suffered such major losses to their fleet, we were of course intrigued.” The green light stopped and the machine beeped loudly. “Fascinating,” muttered Drin. He motioned Mike to step away and it was Wenona’s turn.

“Anyway,” Drin removed his headgear and set it down gently as he shook his head, “We tried learning as much as we could about the race that had taken them down. The blockade, as it was, made that difficult, but certainly not impossible. I have a lot of connections that I’ll admit are not all savory. Rozar has a lot of connections with bounty hunters. Between the two of us, we commissioned deliveries of as much as we could get from Earth to be smuggled across the blockade. Eventually we were able to get live specimens, which have been fascinating to study, but until now, we’ve never been able to successfully get a human.” The scan for Wenona stopped and the machine beeped loudly again. Drin smiled and looked up at them, “And now, we have two.”

“Wait a minute,” Wenona snapped. Her shoulders tensed and a horrified glare began spreading across her face. “Do you mean to tell me you were the ones who hired the montauk that kidnapped us?!”

Oh.

“We might have. I mean, we’re not the only ones in the galaxy hiring them, and not every shipment we hired always came through. Sometimes they’d find another buyer who paid more or was simply more convenient to deliver to. The blockade tended to dissuade a lot of… uh, transactions with us after all. We’re lucky we were able to get what we did. All things considered, we’ve managed to learn so much, but now that you’re both here-”

He didn’t get to finish. Wenona had grabbed a small handheld device off the table and threw it as hard as she could at him. It broke into pieces as it hit him square in the chest.

“YOU!? You did this!? What are we then? Just cargo you finally had delivered?” Another projectile hurtled toward Drin, this one aimed at his head. He was just barely able to duck in time. “Do you have any idea what you’ve put us through? My family? They probably think I’m dead! This is your fault!”

Drin, not wanting any more equipment thrown across the room, lunged at Wenona. Before he could grab her, she dove between his outreached arms and rolled into a pile of stacked metallic boxes. Mike rushed to her side to help her up, pushing a large drum behind him to put an obstacle between them and the alien scientist. The drum was lighter than Mike expected and it continued to move, toppling over and knocking down anything and everything not securely fastened down.

Mike had to admit, it was quite an impressive mess.

Drin turned around and watched in horror as the boxes and crashing drum created a domino effect. The once well-organized lab was suddenly thrown into chaos. Bumps, thuds, and the sound of shattering glass was everywhere. Eventually it climaxed with a loud, hollow clattering of falling metal and a sudden yelp of a large animal.

Both Mike and Wenona froze. Slowly, they turned to the back of the lab where the sound had come from. “What the heck was that?” Mike’s whisper felt strained. Somewhere behind one of the counters, they could hear shuffling of something moving among the fallen lab items. What sounded like claws clicked on the hard surface.

Something furry and strong grabbed their wrists and pulled them back.

“Got you!” Drin gave a low chuckle. “I suppose they did warn me you might be a handful, but I knew I’d be-” he stopped as he noticed the humans already had figured out. His specimen was free.

Slowly, Drin pulled Mike and Wenona behind him as he carefully paced towards the drawer where he kept a spare blaster. Mike could hear the creature padding closer to their side of the lab. He could hear it panting and sniffing. Then it growled. It was a low, dangerous growl that seemed to shake everything in the room. Or maybe that was just his imagination playing it up, because MAN! Everything about that growl told his instincts to turn tail and run.

The growl stopped and the sniffing started again. Drin had nearly reached the drawer when the creature came around the corner.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” muttered Wenona.

It was a dog.

An honest to goodness, from earth, massive dog.

Its muzzle was nearly black, but the rest of its shaggy fur was a mixture of black and golden brown. Its eyes looked droopy and red. Its legs were long and thick, its shoulders looked like they probably would come to Mike’s waist.

No one moved for what seemed an eternity. The trance was broken by the sound of a drawer as Drin slowly began pulling it open. The dog growled again and the drawer stopped. Sniffing, the dog turned its massive head towards where Mike and Wenona were standing.

“Good doggy,” Mike drawled in the most calming voice he could, “nice doggy.”

Something seemed to click in the dogs eyes and suddenly it came bounding towards them. There was nowhere they could go, they had already backed themselves up as far as they could. It was going to eat them! Before they could think of another idea of what to do, the thing was on them.

Literally, on them.

Its paws reached up onto Mike's showers and it barked, loud booming barks before it slathered his face with the biggest, wettest licks any dog had probably ever given in the history of forever.

Mike was completely knocked off his feet and the dog gave the same happy greeting to Wenona. Soon, all three of them were sitting on the floor laughing, or barking in the dog's case, as Drin looked on from across the lab, still frozen in place. His expression was priceless.

“Really need to get a camera somehow,” Mike chuckled to himself.

He scratched around the dog’s ears and down around his neck. That earned him a few extra happy licks to the face, which he tried and failed to push away. His fingers caught on something around the dog's neck. A collar maybe? As soon as the dog leaned over to share the slobbery love with Wenona, Mike was able to pull the collar around so he could read the tag.

“Carson.” The dog turned back to him, as if recognizing the name. “Welcome to our pack Carson.”

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#abduction #humans are weird #humans are space orcs #aliens #space #mike #wenona #jebby #humans and aliens #doggo joins the pack #writblr #original writing

[hymn2000]

Freeze - MCU AU Fanfic - C19

Previous chapter(s): 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18

Story synopsis:- When a burst gas main destroys everything and leaves Peter with nothing, the Stark’s take him in. Thrown together by necessity, they then need to try to keep it together and build a new life. Devastated by loss, Peter doesn’t make things easy for them, and Loki and Tony struggle with their own grief and the responsibility of having someone completely dependant on them.

Chapter description:- Life takes another turn as the rest of Peter’s classmates rejoin the class after their trip

Story warnings/themes: character death, hurt/comfort, trauma, grief, depression/mental health issues, bullying, corporal punishment

Relationships: Frostiron (Loki x Tony) (romantic), Tony and Peter (platonic), Loki and Peter (platonic)

From the same AU as Called To Be A Rock

Chapter 19 - And They Call Themselves Friends

-

True to his word, Peter slept most of the weekend. He was wiped out, physically and emotionally. Malaki hadn’t been back on Friday, so he had another tired, lonely day at school. Taking his school uniform off on Friday after school felt great. He flopped down on his bed and slept soundly until 9am on Saturday. He got up and had something to eat and went down to the lab with Tony, but by 1pm his head was nodding and Tony told him to go and have a lie down.

On Sunday, Tony was out, so Thor came round to keep an eye on him, which was easy work, as the boy was asleep for the most part. 

It ended up feeling like a bit of a wasted weekend, and Monday morning came as a bit of a shock. Peter hid under the covers, hoping that if he was found all hot and sweaty, and if he put on a croaky voice, Tony might let him stay home. All the kids who had been on the Spanish trip were going to be back today. Peter just knew they’d all be Nigel’s and Wendy’s, and he wasn’t prepared to deal with that. He wasn’t strong enough.

-

His plan of pulling a sickie didn’t work. Tony just shook his head and said; “Nice try”, and made him get up and get ready for school anyway. 

“The rest of your class will be back, won’t they?” Tony said. “You should be able to settle into the routine a bit better now”

Peter didn’t bother telling him that that was exactly why he was dreading going. He decided he’d just have to grin and bear it - but he didn’t feel much like smiling.

-

Peter sat on the end of the front right hand row in the form room, pretending to be really interested in his white board. The classroom was already fuller than last week, and the new voices and noisy chatter were most off-putting. He fiddled with a dry-erase marker, picking at the sponge on the top of the cap. He had horrible heart palpitations. He was just waiting for one of these new voices to start scoffing about Common Muck with Scholarships.

-

Three girls entered the form room, arms linked, talking together. The girl in the middle stopped, spotting Peter. 

“Oooh, new kid” she said, glancing to either friend. “He’s cute, don’t you think?”

One of the other girls laughed. “You really have no filter. Well, go and say hello then!”

The girl unlinked herself from her friends, jumping forward, planting her hands on the desk in front of Peter, making him jump.

“Hi! You’re new, aren’t you? I’m Millie!” she looked over her shoulder at her friends. “That’s Florence and Macy”

“It’s Flo” Florence said. “Everyone calls me Flo”

Peter blinked at them, unsure how to react to their sunny, friendly personalities. A voice behind him piped up:

“That’s Peter. He doesn’t talk much”

“Oooh” Millie tapped the white board on the desk. “Is that why you’ve got this?”

Peter nodded, and jumped again as Ms Hathersage appeared.

“Quiet now, you lot! You have exactly four minutes until the bell, and I want absolute silence”

No one else seemed phased by her. Flo tapped Peter’s desk.

“This is our row”

Peter’s heart beat faster. This was it. They’d turn on him now.

“I always sit at the end” Flo said. “Do you mind moving up one?” 

“Honestly Flo, you are so particular sometimes” Macy said, scooting past the back of Peter’s chair and taking the seat at the other end of the row, up against the wall. 

Millie sat next to Macy, and patted the chair beside her. Peter obediently moved over, and Flo took his place. She smiled gratefully at him.

“Thank you” she put her bag down, and spotted Peter’s satchel. “Oh wow, I love your bag! It’s brand new, isn’t it? Where ever did you get it?”

“Flo! Stop badgering him!” Millie laughed. “Ignore her, Peter. She’s got about a million bags already - she doesn’t need to copy you”

“Amelia, quiet now” Ms Hathersage said, and started to take the register.

“She thinks I talk too much” Millie whispered to Peter. “Flo talks lots more than I do, though” 

“Amelia, I’ve already asked you once!”

Millie put a hand up in apology, but as soon as Ms Hathersage’s back was turned, she rolled her eyes. Peter smiled slightly. He liked her.

-

Peter did worry that they were all just being polite, but when the bell rang, Millie and Flo linked arms with him while Macy danced ahead. In Geography, they insisted that he joined them on their table, and Mr Tucker didn’t object. 

Peter felt almost comfortable. These girls were kind, and they didn’t act weirdly about him not speaking. They included him in their conversation and gossiped about the teachers and other students. 

Peter looked at them.

Millie was definitely the leader of the pack. She was a conventionally attractive girl, with shoulder-length dark brown, almost black hair, with sparkling green eyes in her round face. She radiated confidence. 

Flo was definitely the most attractive of the group. She was sweet and bubbly, with porcelain skin and long blonde, almost white hair all the way down her back. She seemed happier daydreaming and doodling in her notebook than paying attention in lessons.

Macy was a bit of a mix. She was calm and collected in class, a little mad outside of it, and she knew exactly how to manage her friends. She had short, medium-brown hair, mostly covered by a headband. She seemed distracted, somehow, but happy.

Peter thought they were all very real people.

-

The three waited at the end of the lesson, making sure Peter didn’t get left behind. They all sighed in an exaggerated fashion as soon as they’d left Mr Tucker’s classroom.

“Thank God for that! I hate Geography more and more every day” Millie said, linking Peter’s arm.

“Me too” Flo said, linking Peter’s other arm. 

“What? Geography’s a laugh - it’s the teacher that’s the problem!” Macy said, prancing ahead.

Peter suddenly realised that she might be a show-off. She seemed to perform her part of the conversation as they went down the corridor, spinning on her toes and clapping and somehow managing to never crash into anyone. 

Peter decided he might like her best. 

“Hey, Peter!” Macy said, stopping suddenly. “Have you had the bagels yet?”

Peter blinked at her.

“Aww, no way! You must try one: they’re the best! I’ll buy today, ok?”

Peter nodded. He didn’t see the need to protest.

-

Macy went off to join the queue in the dining hall, while Millie and Flo took Peter over to a round table at the back of the hall by the coffee machine. He still felt a little nervous. These girls all had big personalities, and he still couldn’t shake the feeling that they were just taking pity on him. 

“So, why have you joined in the middle of the term?” Flo asked. 

Peter didn’t really want to share his story with them. Still, he got out his whiteboard. 

I moved house and my old school was too far away to keep going to. 

Flo nodded. “Oh, right. That’s a bit rubbish”

Peter nodded slightly. Millie smiled at him.

“Are you cold? You’re shaking”

He didn’t want to tell her that he was scared, so he just nodded.

“Aww. You’ll warm up after you’ve eaten”

At that moment, Macy appeared and handed them all cheese and tomato bagels. 

“The food here is great, trust me” she said, taking a seat. 

Peter didn’t feel hungry, but didn’t want to seem rude, so he took a bite when the others did. He was pleasantly surprised. These bagels really were good. He was quite content sat back eating and listening to the girls talking. 

Once he’d finished, he wrote them a question.

Are you all boarders?

Millie shook her head. “Flo and I live with our families not too far away from here. Macy boards though, don’t you, Mace?”

Macy looked up from filing her nails. “Yes, I live Bay Laurel. That’s the girls house. I go home during the holidays though. What about you? Are you boarding?”

I live with my guardians

“I wish I did” Macy said. “But they live in Canada. It would be a long daily commute”

How long have you been boarding for?

“Since I was six. I was at the sister school, and then I moved into Bay Laurel when I was ten, going on eleven. I had some friends moving up with me, so that was nice. We helped each other pack and it made the move easier”

“I used to board” Flo said. “When I was really little, I went to a boarding school a few states over. But it didn’t work out, so father brought me over to St Hendricks so I was closer to home”

“Well” Millie said. “I’m glad I don’t board. We all know the boarding master in Scotts-Pine has a cane”

“Don’t get into trouble and it’s not a problem” Macy said, grinning. “I love how you say it like your father doesn’t own one! Peter? What are you looking so worried about?”

Peter didn’t respond. He knew they might think he was weird if he started asking questions of the corporal-punishment-in-schools variety. 

“You know, I hope I’m not overstepping the mark” Macy said. “But I heard Nigel talking in the queue. He said your family are all gone and that’s why you moved here”

Peter was horrified. How did Nigel know about that? He sighed deeply, looking down at his whiteboard. Millie squeezed his hand.

“You don’t have to tell us”

Peter nodded, but decided he did. If he got it out of the way now, he wouldn’t have to do it again.

My parents both died when I was little, so I lived with my aunt and uncle. My uncle died years ago, and my aunt died in January. I couldn’t stay in Queen’s on my own, so a family friend and their partner took me in. 

Tears filled his eyes, and he looked away quickly. The girls exchanged shocked looks, and Millie took control of the situation.

“Aww, don’t cry! Oh Peter!” she hugged him tight, and he hugged her back. “How awful! I’m so sorry to hear that”

The other two joined in the hug. 

“I’m sorry for your loss. I know it’s hard” Macy said.

“It really does get easier” Flo said. “Thank you for telling us. You didn’t need to do that. We didn’t want to upset you”

Peter couldn’t help crying, not only because of what had happened, but also because these girls were being so kind to him. 

-

The three looked after Peter, getting him a drink and making him laugh to take his mind off it all. Peter appreciated their efforts, although his tears of sadness were very nearly replaced with ones of happiness. Everything that had happened with Ryan and his gang at the other school had left him so isolated and hopeless, so much so that it felt as though kindness was a thing of the past. These girls had proved that theory wrong. 

-

The girls stayed with him throughout the next two lessons, and all through lunch. His appetite still wasn’t great, but Millie introduced him to the pasta queue, and somehow a bowl of pasta and cheese was all he needed. He’d never known it taste so good.

Peter had to see Miss Marns in fourth period, but they came and found him just before fifth so they could go together.

“This is literally a dream come true” Macy said, rereading the brief. 

“Snakes don’t often feature in my dreams” Millie said. “Why are we making snakes? Textiles should be dresses, skirts, maybe even bags!! Not snakes!”

“Make a snake wearing a dress then” Macy said, as though it were an obvious solution. “I’m totally tattooing mine”

“How can you tattoo something made of cloth?” Flo said. 

“By drawing them on! Honestly Flo, stop asking silly questions” she shook her head, and looked at Peter. “What are you thinking for yours?”

Glass eyes

“I don’t think there’s any in here. Maybe you can use buttons?” she said. “Are you any good at sewing?”

Peter shrugged. 

“I’m rubbish at it” Millie said. “At least, I’m rubbish at sewing machines. I can hand-sew ok”

Peter looked down at the brief. He wasn’t sure he’d be any good at sewing, and he didn’t have any ideas about how to design it. He kept thinking about Loki. A part of him wanted to make it for him, but the overwhelming reality that no one knew where he was right now was enough to stunt his idea. He sighed. 

“What about this?” Macy said, shoving an IPad under his nose. “Do you think you could make one like this? I like its little fangs”

“That snake would destroy you, given half the chance” Flo said, peering at the cobra on the screen. She took the IPad and started typing. “You want a cute snake for a toy, surely. Something like this”

She showed them a photo of a corn snake. 

“It’s got massive eyes” Millie said. “We could always use Marlin for inspiration”

Peter looked at her.

“Marlin is my brothers snake” Millie said. “It’s a ball python. I don’t see it often because it lives in his room, but sometimes we put it in the paddling pool just to watch it swim”

“It wiggles” Macy nodded. “I’m not making a boring snake. I’m having a king cobra-type tattooed snake. Can snakes have piercings? I might make a gangster snake”

She looked so serious that Peter couldn’t help but laugh. She glanced at him, and then nodded triumphantly at the other two.

“Peter likes my idea” she stuck her tongue out at them.

“Macy!” Ms Castleton snapped. “Don’t be so rude! That was very unladylike”

“Sorry, Ms Castleton” Macy said, but she crossed her fingers behind her back. 

Peter saw this, and looked at her fondly. 

“What are you staring at?” she said, and stuck her tongue out at him when Ms Castleton’s back was turned.

Peter hesitated and returned the favour. Macy grinned, moving her chair closer to his and pretending to look at his work over his shoulder.

“You’re gonna be just fine here”

-

Tony watched out of the car window as Peter was hugged goodbye. A minute later, Peter opened the passenger door and climbed into the car. 

“Hey kiddo”

Peter pulled the door closed, flopping back in his seat.

“I’ve gotta go to the shops to pick up a few bits before we go home, ok?”

Peter nodded. 

“I’ll try to be quick” 

-

Peter fell asleep in the car after they’d been to the shops. Tony was worried, as he hadn’t said a word since he’d picked him up. Sure, Peter didn’t really talk to strangers any more, and he didn’t speak at school, but he’d mostly stayed talkative with him and Loki. 

He gave him a little shake when they got back to the house, and they went to the kitchen together.

“So” Tony said, switching the kettle on. “How was school?”

Peter just shrugged.

“I saw those girls hugging you. Friends of yours?”

“Oh” Peter didn’t realise he’d been seen. “Um”

“Are they some of the people who were away on the Spanish trip?” Tony pressed.

Peter nodded. 

Tony sighed. “What’s up with you today?? Cat got your tongue?”

Peter just shrugged again. Tony sighed again, and shook his head.

“Go and get changed, and then get your homework done”

-

Peter sat doing his homework in silence. Tony gave him a poke.

“Hey, do you want a snack?”

Peter shook his head. Tony watched him working for a minute.

“Are you ok?”

Peter shook his head again. 

“Talk to me?”

Another shake of the head. Tony didn’t know what to do. He tried to give him a hug, but Peter leant away from him and wouldn’t let him. Tony sighed and left the kitchen, going downstairs and checking the post. He sighed heavily and threw the letters down on the cabinet. Nothing of importance. Still no word from Loki. It was a worrying development, or lack thereof. He didn’t know what to think.

-

Tony caught Peter on the way to his room.

“What’s the matter? You know you can talk to me”

Peter shook his head and tried to wriggle free. Tony held on tighter. 

“You can’t bottle it up forever, kiddo”

Peter pushed his hands away and darted into his room, shutting the door behind him. He wasn’t in the mood for an ultimatum. 

-

Tony kept his distance for a while, but soon time was getting on, so he knocked on Peter’s door. 

“Peter?” There was no reply. “I’m coming in now”

He opened the door and found the boy fast asleep. He sighed and gave him a good shake, waking him up.

“We need to think about getting you fed”

“...’m not hungry”

Tony seized him under the arms and sat him up. 

“Oww! That hurt!”

“Sorry. Right, you need to tell me what’s going on with you” he said. “Are you just tired? Is that it?”

Peter shrugged. 

“Peter, stop being so evasive”

“I don’t want to talk to you! Leave me alone!”

“Peter-”

“No!”

“Oh fine then, be that way” Tony snapped. He checked his watch. “Ok, it’s half seven now. If you’re not in the kitchen by eight o’ clock, you’re not having any tea tonight”

-

Peter went into a sulk. He decided he didn’t care, he didn’t want to speak, and he wasn’t hungry - certainly not for anything made by the likes of Tony. 

But, sulking was hard work. He was determined not to show his face, but he started clock-watching, and at five to eight he cracked. He rushed to the kitchen and buried his face in Tony’s chest.

“I need to talk to you!”

He told him about Millie and Macy and Flo, and his fears that they were just hanging out with him out of pity. He told him everything that had happened that day, and started talking about textiles.

“-so I thought, y’know, I could make it for Loki, but he’s not here any more, and so there’s no point, and I was so horrible to him before he left and now I feel so guilty and a miss him so much and, and-”

“Ok, ok, sweetheart, shh” Tony hugged him close. “It’s ok, chick”

“I want him to come back!”

“I know. I know you do. He’ll come back when he’s ready”

“No he won’t! He won’t ever want to be near me again! I was so hateful to him”

“It’s not your fault he left. He will come back; he promised he would” Tony said firmly. “When he’s ready, and not a moment before”

Peter rested his forehead against Tony’s shoulder, breathing deeply. He knew he needed to believe Tony. After all, he knew him better than anyone else. 

“I just want him to hurry up”

“I know. Try not to think about it. You’ve got other stuff to focus on. School, for a start, and your new friends”

Peter stood back slightly. “Do you really think they’re friends?”

“Sure” Tony said. “They’ll come running up to you tomorrow morning, you’ll see”

“What if you’re wrong?”

Tony smiled. “What if I’m not? Come on, lets get you fed”

*

#my writing #fanfiction #mcu #marvel fanfiction #mcu fanfiction #frostiron #peter parker #spiderman homecoming

[breyito]

Of Friendship and Affection

This is the story I’ve been working on for the Peter & Tony Big Bang . I had the pleasure to work with the awesome @hereandnowwearealive who made gorgeous art for this fic. Go check her stuff!

Tittle: Of Friendship and Affection

Summary: After the secret is out of the bag (literally), Peter has to include his Aunt on the superhero thing. Tony is all for, especially if it means getting to see embarrassing photos of his newest protegé. Giving life advice is not something Tony is particularly good at; but fortunately, when it comes to best friends he’s had a pretty good run. (His health might not be ready for all the mini-heart attacks this kid gives him on a daily basis, though.)

Word count: 9k

Pairings/Relationships: Tony Stark&Peter Parker, Ned Leeds&Peter Parker, May Parker&Peter Parker, Michelle Jones&Peter Parker

Rating: T

Warnings: Language, Canon-typical violence

Notes: this is set after Spider-Man: Homecoming; but in between the fight with the Vulture and Happy picking Peter from school there's a two week window, where Peter has gone out many nights (in his old suit) with Ned as his back-up.

“So” Aunt May started; after all the screaming died down a bit. “Who else knows about this ‘hero-business’?” she asked. Peter knew she already suspected Mr. Stark (the date of his brand-new scholarship and the Leipzig Airport battle was too close to deny anything); she just wanted him to confirm it.

“Well…Ned and…Mr. Stark are the ones that know.” Besides Mr. Toomes, the Vulture, who had zero issues with killing me, he thought. Yeah, maybe leave that detail for later.

“Mr. Stark. Of course he knows. How else would you have a suit like that? It’s his tech, isn’t it?” at Peter’s nod, she got up and started pacing. “He is a manipulative bastard! How can he force you to-to do this just to get a scholarship!?”

“Ma-”

“I have to go to the police. Tell them what he’s doing.”

“May-”

“No, no, not the police.” Peter relaxed. Bad move. “The police won’t believe me; or Stark can buy them. The news, I have to go to the news. They will air the story-”

“Aunt May!” Peter yelled. She suddenly stopped and looked at him with wide eyes. “Aunt May, please, sit down.” She did. “Listen to me; ok? I got these powers months before meeting Tony Stark. The reason I met him at all is because I was…stopping crime and catching buses with my bare hands and people recorded it and posted those videos online. He tracked it down to me. He never forced me to do anything, okay?”

“But…but what about that retreat? He took you to Germany, didn’t he?” She asked. “He gave you that suit and made you go, right? He…he took you into a battle against the Avengers! You could have been hurt! Colonel Rhodes got paralyzed…oh my god, that could have been you!” Peter could see that May was starting to get mad again, so he quickly intervened.

“It wasn’t supposed to be a battle at all. I was just there to web feet together and ‘increase numbers’. Mr. Stark never thought Rogers would take things that far.”

“Never mind that! You are a minor. And he gave you a, a super suit and led you to battle; and then let you keep the armored suit!”

“He knew that I was never going to stop trying to help people!” May tried to say something but Peter interrupted her. “Going against a mugger, with-with a knife-”

“Knife!?” she choked out.

“-or or a gun-”

“A gun!? Peter, oh my god-!”

“-would you rather me wearing pajamas or a full Kevlar suit? A, a suit that can warm me up when it’s cold and contacts Mr. Stark immediately if things go wrong and has this amazing AI that helps me with everything I ask her to and…” he drifted off. He swallowed and looked into his aunt’s eyes. “Mr. Stark has been taking care of me. He tried to keep his distance to not give me more ideas than the ones I already have, but you can see that it didn’t work.” May snorted a little laugh. “Aunt May…he realized the second he confronted me that I wasn’t going to stop. Because I’m not. And he saw that and decided to help me and protect me.”

May stayed quiet for a long time, before she exhaled and nodded to herself; her mind resolved.

“…Aunt May?” Peter asked, nervous.

“I’m guessing you have Mr. Stark’s phone number?” she asked, standing. Peter nodded. “Well, I think it’s time he and I have a talk, about training sessions and responsibility. Come, Peter.” With that, she left the room. Peter swallowed, contemplating whether he could just go live under a bridge to avoid the humiliation of his aunt lecturing Mr. Stark.

“Peter!” May yelled from the living room, impatient.

Yeah, probably not.

---{}---

---{}---

---{}---

“Mr. Stark!” Peter said, surprised, after opening the door of his apartment.

“Hello, kid.” Tony smiled at him, amused.

“What are you doing here?” the teen asked nervously, looking back at the living room, where his Aunt May was. She turned and smiled at the engineer.

“I invited him” she answered. “I thought dinner might be a good time for the three of us to talk about responsibility and your training regime in person.” She waved Tony in, and Peter just stood there, frozen for a moment; then he closed the door.

Man, this won’t be good for me, he thought, grimacing.

“Tony, you shouldn’t have bothered!” he heard May say, peaking in the bags the engineer had passed to her. “I told you I wanted to cook.”

“Exactly” Tony answered. Peter swallowed a snort. “I thought you shouldn’t come home after working all day in a hospital (I’m sure that’s very exhausting) and have to cook on top of that.” He added, with a winning smile. Smooth, Peter thought.

“Well, thank you. This Italian looks great. I didn’t know Paola’s made take out.”

“They don’t, unless it’s for me.” The engineer winked. “My mother was friends with the owner for decades. She’s known me since before I could walk.”

“That’s cute.” Aunt May said, with a glint in her eyes. “Maybe I should show you some photos of Peter before he could walk, after dinner.”

“What!? No!” yelled the teen, embarrassed.

“Oh, I’d love that.” Tony laughed. Peter huffed and left the kitchen, towards his bedroom.

He didn’t realize the other man was following him until it was too late.

“So" Tony started, looking around the teen's bedroom "that 'really old movie' uh?" he said, with a smug ass grin on his face as he walked to the desk; where the Lego Death Star sat proudly. Peter's cheeks went bright red.

"Ididn'twantyoutothinkIwasanerd." The kid muttered, looking down.

"Sorry; what was that?" said the inventor, putting his hand around his ear "I couldn't hear it because I am really old." he laughed.

"Mr. Stark!" Peter whined, face flaming red. "Stop it" he mumbled with his face buried in a pillow.

"Alright, alright, I'll stop." he chuckled.

“Uff. I didn’t want you to think I was a nerd, alright? I had just met you; my life-long hero, and you asked me to join the Avengers on a mission, and took me to Germany even though I had never been out of the country; and you gave me this crazy new suit and then we were in the middle of a fight with the other Avengers and Colonel Rhodes was on the comms with us and I had a part of a plan but it was because of this movie that most of my classmates have never seen and laugh at us because we did and…and you were all so cool and I was already the youngest person there and I didn’t want to seem like a such nerd.” Peter finishes his rant, only breathing then.

There were a few moments of silence and Peter felt his face (which had gone back to a quasi-normal in his speech) go slowly back to a tomato red.

"First of all; w-ow.” Tony said, eyes wide. “I’ve never met another person (besides myself) that could talk for two minutes without breathing before.” Then he took a deep breath “And two; you do know who you are working with, right?” he laughed “You really think that Rhodey and I are anything but nerds? We both graduated MIT (even if I started at 14). We got to watch the original Star Wars trilogy on theaters (even if we were nothing but kids). We went to see ‘Star Trek V: The Final Frontier’ on the first weekend (good god; that makes me sound so fucking old). He is a legit rocket scientist. I build robots and have been creating AIs since I was 17. If there’s something we’re never going to laugh at you for, is for being a nerd. Because so are we, kid. And we are the coolest.” He winked.

Peter didn’t know if he should be relieved, laugh hysterically or go back to bury his head in the pillow by his side.

“Hurry up, kiddo. I’m sure the food’s ready. Besides, your Aunt said she wanted to show me some pictures of you, and I don’t want to miss the opportunity.” Tony said from the doorway.

Living with his head in the pillow sounded great right about now. Just a normal Friday family dinner, right? Peter thought sarcastically, groaning into the fabric.

---{}---

The dinner went surprisingly okay, actually. Mr. Stark brought enough food to make him feel full, and it was so delicious Peter was already thinking about a midnight snack. They even had gelato!

Yes, dinner went great. Which meant that whatever happened afterwards was not going to be good for him. Peter, unfortunately, didn’t know that. So when he, after brushing his teeth and putting on his pajamas, went to say goodbye to his aunt and Mr. Stark, was completely unprepared for what he saw. May and Mr. Stark were sitting on the couch, his aunt holding open an album-his baby album and showing it to the other man.

“And here it’s the robot Richard (his father) bought him for his second birthday.” She pointed to another picture. “Ooh! We took this one because he picked the flower in the park and wouldn’t let go of it until his mother came home.” Tony had a big grin on his face and a particular shine in his eyes, looking at the pictures, thinking about how adorable the kid was, even as an squishy and drooling miniature human.

Peter froze on the threshold and then made a strangled noise so high Aunt May jumped thinking it was a mouse (he would deny until forever that the noise came from him, though).

“Aunt May!” he yelled. “How could you!?” he asked, rushing to take the sky blue monstrosity, full of incriminating and mortifying pictures of his earlier years, out of the enemy’s hands. But Tony took the damned thing from May and danced away. Cue an impromptu chase in the living room, with Peter trying his best to grab the album and the engineer laughing and twirling, looking at more and more pictures. He even cooed at them!

Aunt May looked on from the couch, amused and entertained. Peter could feel his face flaming at every turned page. Then the inventor suddenly stopped cold.

“You had an Iron Man mask?” Tony asked; eyes wide open. “And cut-off gloves painted as repulsors?” he continued, pale all of the sudden.

“…Yes?” Peter answered, confused.

“You were that kid at the expo…” Mr. Stark murmured, looking straight into Peter’s eyes. Peter didn’t understand why the engineer would look at him with such intensity over a simple mask- then he remembered, and froze again. He looked over at May, whom had a weird expression on her face.

“Um, y-yeah, I went to the 2010 expo. Uncle Ben took me.” He said, hoping Tony would understand and not say a word about the crazy robot almost killing him. “May was working and couldn’t come.”

“…Oh” said Tony. “Right.” He glanced at the nurse, and cleared his throat. “Sorry, bad memories” he said. His smile looked a bit forced, but May took care of that when she commented that neither she nor Ben could convince Peter to take off that mask for anything else than eating for two weeks. Peter gladly took the embarrassment over that dark look on Mr. Stark’s eyes.

And when the engineer rushed to leave the apartment; Peter excused himself to his bedroom and waited for him to say his goodbyes. When Tony closed the door, Peter started to climb down the wall of the building. He yelled a ‘Mr. Stark!’ and jumped, landing in front of the other man.

“Damn it, kid.” Tony muttered, with a hand on his chest. “Heart condition, remember?”

“S-sorry, Mr. Stark, but I, I couldn’t let you leave like that.” Peter said with a frown on his face.

“Like what?” the engineer asked, taking off his glasses and massaging the bridge of his nose. “Like you didn’t almost get killed because of me before I even knew who you are?”

“That wasn’t your fault!” Peter exclaimed, offended.

“Not my-? Kid, it was my expo!” he shouted.

“Yeah, but the robots weren’t your doing! If I remember correctly, it was Hammer and Vanko and the freaking American Army that screwed up; not you.” The kid said, crossing his arms. Tony could almost physically see the stubbornness radiating out of the kid.

“Air Force.” He said. At Peter’s confused look he clarified “It was the Air Force, not the Army. Rhodey hammered the difference into me decades ago. He’ll chew your ear off if you confuse them when he’s around.”

“I get to met War Machine?” Peter said, awed. Then he cleared his throat and straightened his back. “Still. It wasn’t your fault. I was a stupid kid and didn’t run and stayed there like my gloves could take out a, a fucking robot. Ben was so mad at me. After you took off, he found me and made me promise never to tell Aunt May.” The teen looked sheepishly at the engineer. “So please don’t tell her?” Tony sighed.

“Alright, alright. This stays between us.” Peter’s smile was big and contagious, so Tony didn’t have a choice but to give him a small one back. “But I reserve the right to use this if you ever misbehave and you need a time out. I’m sure she’ll ground you for a few days.”

The betrayed look that passed the teen’s face was funny and the chocked and high ‘Mr. Stark!’ that followed was hilarious. The engineer laughed for a few moments, before he put his hand on Peter’s shoulder, opening his mouth. Before he could say anything, though, he was interrupted.

“Nice pants, Peter.” said a neighbor that was entering the building, winking at him. Peter’s face flushed for a second, but then he breathed and answered with a huge smile.

“Thanks, Nicky! They were a present and are really comfortable. I’m sure I can get you a pair to go with your ‘punk Hello Kitty’ shirt.”

“Cool!” said the woman, before waving at the pair and closing the door. When Peter turned to face Mr. Stark again, the man had a flabbergasted expression on his face.

“What?” asked the teen, feeling self-conscious.

“Nothing, just…That…did not played out the way I was expecting.” The engineer said, shaking his head. Then he put his glasses back on and started walking towards his car. He got in and before closing the door, he spoke:

“I’m glad you like the outfit I bought you.” He winked at the teen and drove away.

---{}---

---{}---

---{}---

“So…she knows now.” Ned summed up. It was Monday morning, and both were sitting outside. Peter was trying to catch Ned up on everything that had happened over the weekend.

“Yeah” sighed Peter “she knows. And she’s talking to Mr. Stark almost every day now, trying to keep me from breaking ‘boundaries’.” He said, making the quotes with his fingers.

“Sweet!” Ned exclaimed, surprising Peter.

“What? Didn’t you hear me? My aunt is embarrassing me every day in front of Mr. Stark. How is that sweet?” he asked, almost offended.

“Oh, not that part. That part sucks.” Ned reassured him quickly. “I meant that now that your Aunt knows (and she’s not going to the police or threatening you to hang the webs) we can tell people!” he ended with a big smile.

“Tell people? No, of course not!” hissed Peter, looking around to make sure no one was listening.

“Why not? Dude, we’d be so popular! Everyone would love you!”

“Yeah, if they even believe me.”  

“We can show them! Get everyone in the school in the gymnasium and you can wear the suit and-”

“No, we will not tell the whole school that I’m a superhero!!” he half whispered, half yelled.

“Why not? Dude, that’s like, the most impressive thing you could do! You’d be the king of our school!”Ned kept going, full of eagerness.

“There are more important things than impressing people in high school, Ned!!”

“Like what!?” Ned asked, not seeing the issue.

“Oh, I don’t know” he said, voice dripping with sarcasm “like saving people, staying alive, keeping my identity a secret!?”

“Why on Earth would you want to keep that a secret!? It’s awesome!” Ned yelled, getting mad.

“Yes, it’s awesome, when it’s not putting the people I care about in danger!” Peter responded.

“The whole world knows who Iron Man and War Machine are! And Ms. Potts and Colonel Rhodes’ family are perfectly safe!”

“Safe? Do you have amnesia or something? Ms. Potts was kidnapped and experimented on not even five years ago! It was a fucking miracle that she survived! Happy got blown up; he barely made it!” Peter was getting agitated.

“Yeah, but that was years ago. That hasn’t happened since, right?” asked Ned, secured in his knowledge.

“Seriously?” Peter said, baffled. “They are rich people! They have bodyguards and-and they are public figures! If something happened to them, the world would know in a heartbeat. Besides, everyone knows that they count with Tony Stark’s protection.”

“What about Spider-Man’s protection?”

“Really, Ned? The minute people find out I’m still a teenager, they’ll lose any respect or fear of me!” Ned tried to say something, but Peter cut him off. “No, Ned. I won’t make my aunt (or you or any of my friends) a target. It’s not happening. No one else can know about this, you hear me? No one.” With that, he turned around and left. The Vulture’s threat kept repeating in his mind, eyes cold as ice and -ill you and everybody you love kill you and everybody you love kill you and everybody you love kill yo-

---{}---

---{}---

---{}---

Peter couldn’t wait until the bell rang and the school day was over. It’s not like it used to be before; when the suit was new to him and he felt he had to prove something every time he put it on.

No, for once, the reason why he ached to go home had nothing to do with Spider-Man. Well, it did…but it didn’t, at the same time. He wasn’t in a rush to go to a back alley and change; he just wanted to get the hell out of the building he was currently trapped in. The fight he had with Ned this morning was going in circles in his head. They hadn’t talked to each other since their argument. They spent the whole morning ignoring the other’s presence and only speaking when it was necessary for an assignment. At lunch, Peter had walked into the cafeteria and promptly walked out when he saw Ned and MJ sitting in their usual table. Appetite gone, he only ate an apple. Peter just wanted to forget it and pretend it never happen. But he knew it wasn’t possible; because Ned was the least subtle person Peter has ever met (and that included Tony Stark) and they would have to talk about it in order to put it pass them.

Only; they have already had this discussion multiple times. And each time Peter said no. He couldn’t just give away his identity. He wouldn’t. He was terrified (had been ever since the Vulture ended behind bars; fearing that the man would try to use the information to send someone to kill him…or May, or Ned) of people finding out about it. In the two weeks following Homecoming, Ned had been there, as the guy in the chair, every time Spider-Man went patrolling. Every mugger stopped, every rape avoided, every theft thwarted, every direction Peter wasn’t sure of; Ned was on his ear (he was there when Karen wasn’t, when she couldn’t be); guiding him and providing commentary. It was so...freeing, having someone to talk to. And it grounded him, too. Ned provided options that Peter wouldn’t have thought of, tried to make him see his limitations (not that Peter always listened, but still). Peter knew that he was really, really lucky to have Ned as his friend. He trusted Ned.

But at the same time…at the same time he was terrified that Ned would just blurt it out (to Flash, or MJ, or the entire team). And then…then Peter would have to deny it (and put up with the mean jokes and the bulling) and paint Ned as a liar; or would have to come forward and prove he was Spider-Man; and paint a huge target on Aunt May, all of his friends and himself. And the thing was…Peter didn’t know what he would choose; if that happened. Because he knew, he just knew that if he denied everything; school would be hell for Ned. Flash would never stop. But if he revealed himself as Spider-Man? He would be putting everyone in danger. It might be selfish of him; but he liked his life as it was. Why did Ned feel the urge to change that?

---{}---

Finally, the bell rang and Peter left. He knew Ned had Robotics right now (and he would usually wait for him if he could); but today he escaped. He was just going to go to MJ’s to ask her about their Spanish homework and then head home. Maybe take a nap; before patrolling at night (he wasn’t even excited about being allowed to wear Mr. Stark’s suit again, not anymore).

But of course the universe couldn’t agree with him. Because the one day Peter didn’t want to think about putting on the suit; there was a robbery happening in the alley just in front of him. He knew that he was the only one able to hear what was going on, because the thieves had covered the victims’ mouths with their hands. Cursing, Peter ran and crossed the street. Then he hid behind a dumpster and dug up his suit from under his homework. With the suit on, he climbed the side of the building until he reached the roof.

The minute Peter put eyes on the situation; he knew it wasn’t going to be easy.

“Karen” he whispered.

“Yes, Peter?” she answered instantly, like she always did.

“Text Ned. Say it’s you and that I’m trying to stop a robbery, but that there are two robbers and three kids involved. It’s urgent. I need my guy in the chair.” A minute later, the connection came live.

“[Peter]” Ned started, obviously agitated. He must have run from the shop to the computer science lab. “[What’s going on?]”

“I need you to help me think how to handle this.” He whispers. “Karen, give him visual.”

“[Got it.]” Ned said when he the live footage showed up on the screen. “[Ugh; that’s ugly.]”

“Yeah, tell me about it. These guys are obviously enjoying scaring these kids to death.” Peter hissed, watching.

“[It sure seems so. Shit, Peter!]” Ned exclaimed suddenly.

“What? What is it?”

“[One of them (the guy with the flannel shirt) has a knife out!]”

“Crap. What do I do?”

“[Why would I know? You are the superhero.]” Ned answered, a bit prickly.

“I don’t know Ned; because you probably know this suit better than I do! Is there any web I can use?” Peter asked, trying to think about the hundred of combinations.

“[You…could try to aim really well at the blade with the acid one?]”Ned suggested.

“I have acid in this suit!?” he yelped, surprised and scared.

“You have, Peter. But it is well isolated; the acid would never touch your skin.” Karen answered.

“Shit, shit, shit. Okay.” He breathed in, then out. “Can it melt…whatever metal that is?” he asked Karen.

“Certainly. That one would be combination 2-6-8.”

“Alright. Ned, give me a hand here? I want to melt the knife, not this guy’s hand.” Peter said, adjusting the web-shooter.

“[Okay. You need to aim to the right…a 43° angle, so that it will bounce on the wall and take the knife out of his hand. And then melt it. You have a three seconds window since you shoot until it starts to disintegrate the metal; so you have to put enough strength into it. It’ a one shot deal.]”

---{}---

Nothing went as planned.

One of the kids saw him in the roof and yelled his name, ruining the element of surprise completely. Peter still managed to get the knife out of the guy’s hand, but the man would have to be treated for mild chemical burns on his hand. Peter had apologized profusely as soon as the man started to scream; but the second robber didn’t seem to care when he grabbed a kid and threw her at him. Spider-Man managed to grab the child mid air and get her to the floor. Then he shielded her and the other two so they could run out of the alley and onto the street.

By then the thief already had shot at him a couple of rounds (those would surely leave bruises) and, seeing that those wouldn’t stop him, by now had part of a table in his hands. He surprised Peter with a hit that sent him to the ground and then bashed the piece of wood repeatedly against the hero’s head, until it broke. Then he kicked Peter in the middle and shoulder a few times. Seeing that the hero wouldn’t get up, the second robber grabbed the weeping man and together they started to leave.

Peter saw this and tried to shoot a web at them, but the thief still had the gun. He walked closer and aimed it at his head. The last thing Spider-Man heard before passing out was the deafening sound of the shots. Then he felt the bullets impact on his forehead and blacked out.

---{}---  

“-ter”

“[Parke-]”

“-eter”

“[…answer me, damn it!]”

“Guys?” Peter asked, disoriented. “Ned?”

“[Finally, Peter! We’ve been calling for you for a minute and a half! I can’t believe you passed out! Actually I can’t believe you are still breathing after two bullets to the head; although of course I can, because Tony Stark makes the best suits and-]”

“Ned, sto-op.” Groaned the hero; clenching at his head. “I can’t… hear…well. I’m…dizzy.”

“You have sustained a severe concussion, Peter. You also have bruised ribs, a cracked scapula and are bleeding from the head.” Karen reported, sounding worried. “Mr. Stark has been notified, though unfortunately he is in another state. He highly recommended you to hide until he can take you home.”

“Mr. Stark? No…he will be so worried…” Peter lamented, trying to get up. “Can’t I just…lie here? I’m comfy…here.”

“[No, no, no, you can’t. The police are less than five minutes away. You have to get out of there or you’ll be arrested.]” Ned explained.

Now that Peter thought about it; the ringing he was hearing wasn’t only in his head. He could hear sirens too. It was annoying, he wanted silence.

“[-it; I’m calling MJ.]” He heard Ned say, and that made him react.

“What? What for?”

“[Because you can barely stay awake right now and won’t be able to get out of there alone. Climb the building or swing away even less.]”

“But why MJ? What does she have to do with…with anything?” Peter asked, trying to get his eyes to focus.

“[Peter; you are in her street. She lives in the next edifice over.]” Ned says, really worried right now.

“No. No. She…can’t find out. I’ll-I’ll just stay on the roof of one of these buildings.”

“I very much doubt you’ll be able to climb, Peter. You should listen to Ned.”

“No! Don’t do it.” Peter refused, even as he heard the sirens coming closer. “Just…direct me towards a building that has a fire escape, alright? You’ll have to direct me, though, because I can’t see shit with blood on my eyes.” Pause. Long pause.

“[Fine. But if you get arrested, you better not spill my name.]”

“Duh; I’d never.”

“[Ok. Keep walking.]”After a few moments Peter spoke.

“Isn’t far enough?”

“No, keep walking. Keep walking. Stop. Now… jump and catch the ladder.]” Peter has to try a few times, clenching his middle with one arm; all the while letting pain filled groans escape his throat. Finally, he managed. He supported himself on the metal frame, resting his throbbing head in the cold surface for a few seconds; whishing he could just stay there until everything stopped spinning and hurting so much. “[Peter. Peter. Spider-Man!” Peter jumped and shook his head to clear it (not that it helped). “[Focus. Now go up the stairs. You need to get to the fifth floor.]”

“What? Noo…” he whined, as his body slowly, slowly moved. “Why?”

“[Because otherwise the police will see you and follow you up.]”

“Alright.” Peter whispered, still climbing. “Tell me when I can stop.”

The ascent lasted for what felt an eternity. In a corner of his mind, Peter bet Ned was biting his nails, nervous out of his mind.

“How much more? I-I can’t more, I need to rest.” Peter mumbled. The fact that he sounded sleepier every time he talked was a bad sing.

“[Just one more floor, buddy.]”

“No, no more, please. Here it’s fine. I can’t hear anyone.” His legs trembled and he fell on his knees. “I’ll…rest here for a bit.” He could feel his mind slipping away, floating somewhere.

“[Peter, don´t you dare!” the scream broke the fog on his brain. “[You have to go up another floor.]” Peter whined and Ned let out something that resembled a growl out of frustration. “[Come on, Parker, you can do it.]”

On hands and knees, Peter clumsily moved one step at a time. By the last one, his breathing was heavy and painful, and all of his limbs trembled.

“Did I do it…Is here fine?” he mumbled, before crashing. His arm was at an awkward angle under his torso, and his ribs were burning and he could feel the blood, warm and thick, spread down his face.

“[…shit, Michelle, hurry!]”

---{}---

---{}---

---{}---

Peter regained consciousness slowly. His everything hurt everywhere. He tried to move, but his side strongly protested to that. So did his arm. And his back. And god, his head. He sighed and tried to touch his forehead, which seemed to be the source of the pain. His vision was a bit murky. Then he noticed the red and blue of the suit and sat up in a jump. His heartbeat was out of the charts. His ribs were hurting real bad but he ignored it, trying to find out where he was. He looked around, and saw he was in a bedroom (not his, or Ned’s, or one in the Compound). He swallowed. Then he saw the photo on the nightstand and something clicked in his brain.

“…long until he gets here?”

“Mr. Stark said an hour, hour and a half.” Ned. Ned was talking to someone.

“He’s gonna help me clean this mess up, right?” That was MJ, always practical.  Peter’s eyes widened and he touched his face again. He didn’t have his mask on. Fuck! He cursed mentally.  

He grabbed his mask that was in the pillow next to him and walked out of the bedroom. Ned and Michelle were talking in the hallway, trying to clean up a trail of blood.

“What. did. you. do. Ned?” he asked, punctuating every word. The other boy jumped, startled, but MJ just arched an eyebrow.

“I-I told you that the police was too close. And Mr. Stark was in another state. So I called MJ, like I said I would, and she helped you.”

“You are really heavy, Parker.” The girl said, huffing. “My arms are going to be so sore tomorrow.” She added.

Peter grabbed Ned’s arm and tugged him a few feet away.

“Ned” he hissed “what the hell?”

“What?” he said, breaking Peter’s grip. “The police came this close to find you. Wasn’t that what you were so desperately trying to avoid?” the other boy sarcastically asked.

“This is not better!” Peter yelled, yanking at his hair and regretting it dearly. “You didn’t have to do this! I could have-”

“What? What could you have done? You barely made it to the fifth floor. MJ had to drag you to her bedroom.”

“You could have just left me there! I would have gotten better and then-”

“And then what? You have been out for hours! You really think no one would have seen you and called the cops? Any sane person would have called the cops to arrest a vigilante passed out on their fire escape.” Ned said, annoyed.

“Apparently I’m not a sane person.” Michelle piped in, face blank. Peter ignored her.

“That was not your decision to make!”

“Actually it was, because I was the only one able to call for help.”

“You had no right to expose me like that! I’m compromised now!” Peter yelled back, raging.

“If you think this compromises you, Parker, you are more delusional than I thought.” MJ deadpanned.

“Shut it, Michelle. This doesn’t involve you. It shouldn’t involve you.” He remarked. “But because someone couldn’t keep his mouth shut-”

“It’s my job as your guy in the chair, to make sure you don’t die in a ditch!” Ned yelled, throwing his hands in the air.

“Then maybe I need another guy in the chair!” the hero screamed.

Then he put his mask on and jumped out of the window, swinging away.

Michelle and Ned watched him leave; Ned with a sense of dread and bubbling anger and Michelle definitely unimpressed.

“He could have used the door, you know.” She said, before turning around and leaving to get more cleaning products.

The blood wasn’t going to magically disappear.

---{}---

---{}---

---{}---

Peter barely made it home. He was feeling dizzy all over again; and his ribs were killing him. But his back had to be the worst; he had definitely aggravated his scapula injury with the swinging. He had enough forethought to grab two especial protein bars from the kitchen (Mr. Stark had come up with them as soon as Peter told him that his metabolism was a problem); because he knew that his recovery would go faster if he was well fed and he hadn’t really eaten since breakfast. Then he locked himself in his bedroom, without even taking his suit off. He just…wanted to sleep until everything made sense again. God, the things he said to Ned…Stupid, stupid, stupid!! Parker, you are such a jerk.

---{}---

“I know it’s difficult to accept you messed up, Peter, but you have to apologize.” Said Tony; trying to not seem too exasperated. He wanted the teen to open up to him, not shut down on him. It was probing to be more and more difficult, though. Tony understood the teen angst perfectly (he went through the same things, minus the powers) but if the kid continued to be an absolute asshole, he would end up without the much needed support on those fateful years. And yeah, Tony might be a little over dramatic; but god knows he would have never survived his teenage years without Rhodey.

“Peter, you need to say sorry to Ned and Michelle. What you said was incredibly rude and unfair. They were just helping you.” May said, hoping that a miracle would happen and Peter would actually listen.

“Helping me?” A voice from inside could be heard. “Ned revealed my identity five hours after I explicitly told him not to!” Peter yelled. He was obviously pretty worked up.

“Ned didn’t have another choice, honey-” his aunt started, but Tony interrupted her. If the kid wanted to be treated like an adult, he needed to stop acting like a brat. And enabling him wouldn’t help.  

“Oh, grow up, Parker! They saved your ass!” he exclaimed loudly, ready to break the lock on the door in another minute if Peter didn’t drag his butt outside. “It’s because of them that you are not in a cell god-knows-where!”

“Oh, come on! It was only the police! I could have avoided them without help!” the teen cried out, offended.

“Really? Is that why you passed out; because you could handle it?” Tony snarled and then took a few deep breaths before talking again. “If they had caught you, it wouldn’t have just been ‘the police’. You are a super-human now, Peter. And technically…you are a vigilante. And a minor. All of that would mean that A) the police would have called someone to deal with the super-human bit and you’d probably end up dealing with Ross; and B) your aunt could have been sent to trail for negligence and would have probably lost your custody, meaning that the State would have taken you in.”

Both adults waited for an answer, but there was only silence for a long time.  Encouraged, Tony kept talking.

“We are trying to get rid of Ross, and to make the Accords more sensible, but that kind of things take time. If the cops had caught you…I would have intervened, of course, but your identity would have become public knowledge (at least to all the powerful people interested in super-humans).” Still no answer. “And you behaved like a complete jerk to your friends; considering they had to drag your heavy persona to the bedroom.” More silence. The adults looked at each other, and with a nod from May, Tony activated his watch.

Then, the sound of the window closing took them by surprise. Tony rushed to open the door; but Peter was already gone, swinging between the buildings of Queens.

Tony sighed and massaged his temples. Dealing with teenagers was the worst.

---{}---

---{}---

---{}---

“You realize that if I didn’t know you are Spider-Man, I’d be seriously worried right now?” Tony said, stepping out of his suit.

“Can you please just…not?” Peter asked, balancing his legs over the edge of the building.

It was one of the tallest on the city; and he liked to sit here and watch everything unfold from the top. It was rather peaceful, if you didn’t care about the noise.

“Do what?” asked the engineer; sitting next to Peter.

“Not do this…whole ‘surrogate-dad’ thing. The ‘it’s all going to be okay in the morning; you’ll find someone else’ spiel.”

Tony chuckled, shaking his head. Kids these days, he thought. Then he winced, because damn, things like that made him feel old.

“Kid, Ned is not one of your teenage crushes. He is your best friend; your ‘guy in the chair’, right?” the genius asked, looking down. Tony had the sudden thought that he was lucky not to have problem with heights, because they were pretty up high.

“…Yeah.” Peter mumbled; shoulders dropping from the defensive position they had been in since he heard the repulsors.

“Believe me, Pete, your best friend is going to be your anchor.” Tony said, smiling. “Especially in this kind of lifestyle.”

“So you don’t believe that high school friendships end when we graduate?” the teen asked, sounding miserable.

“I know our experiences are pretty different, kiddo, but I really don’t. I mean, I was already in MIT when I met Rhodey, but I was fourteen. And despite petty fights, huge fights, betrayals and months of not seeing each other; we are still here. I’m still his pain-in-the-ass little brother and he’s still my platypus.” Peter smiled a little at that.

“It’s just…” he sighed. “It’s just, sometimes I feel like he’s jealous, you know? Like he wished he had these powers instead of me.”

“Peter…” Tony said gently, putting his hand on the kid’s shoulder. “…of course he’s jealous sometimes. He’s human. And a teen. Anyone would be at least a little envious if their best friend suddenly can do the things you wished your whole life you could do. It doesn’t mean anything. I would get so jealous whenever Jim presented a girl to his parents, or made new friends; because that’s something I was never good at. It didn’t help that I wished I could have a family like his. And he envied my mind sometimes, the first few years. He got into MIT on a scholarship, you see, and keeping his GPA was hard in between all of his classes and his Basic Training. Me, on the other hand…I rarely went to classes and still aced almost every test. He resented that and it hurt me; because kids my age (or older) in school would always do that and would beat me when I said I wouldn’t do their homework for them. But I didn’t want to lose his friendship; so I did something I had never done before. I tried to do his homework.” He laughed “Man; that did not work out the way I wanted; like, at all. He got so offended and I couldn’t see why and we fought. Badly.” He breathed in deeply, eyes far away. Peter felt guilty for making him sad, but he really wanted to hear the end of the story, so he said nothing.

>>“It was awful. Our first big argument and we didn’t talk to each other for almost a month, but it felt like so much more. At the end, Mama Rhodes had to come and force us to talk to each other. She said she was tired of Jim moping over the phone on every call and that she missed hearing me geek out about Star Trek or science with her boy over the land line. So we patched things up. He tried to include me more often with his friends and class mates (though that not always worked) and I learned not to do things for him and just offer my help and let him decide if he wanted it.”

None of them spoke for a while; Tony watching the city lights and Peter taking in and processing everything the engineer had said to him.

“And things went back to normal?” The teen asked, hopeful now.

“After a while. It took time. But our friendship became stronger because of it.” He seemed so sure about that so Peter had no choice but to believe him.

“We don’t have a Mama Rhodes, though. Aunt May doesn’t know half of it and we try to keep her out of it unless it’s super necessary.” Peter mused, thinking about all the patrols that May would skin him for (especially if she knew he didn’t have the Kevlar suit and was out on his ‘Spidey-pajamas’, as Tony liked to call them).

“But you have me!” Tony said with a grin.

“What? No, no, no Mr. Stark-”the teen startled.

“Come on kid! Put on your mask and I’ll let you surf of my back” he winked. “Otherwise, I’ll just carry you bridal style, like a damsel in distress. Bet that will get a smile out of Ned.” He laughed and got up.

Peter sighed, but picked up his mask and put it on. He did owe Ned an apology. Michelle too. And…well, surfing on Iron Man’s back seems pretty cool (he’s been trying to convince Tony of that the whole weekend, he’s not gonna say no).

“By the way, when was the last time you ate? You know you heal better when your body is nourished and my scans show that your healing rate is slower than usual. I’m pretty sure you are hungry.”

Peter’s stomach growled as in agreement, and the teen groaned. Tony could be such a dad!

---{}---

---{}---

---{}---

Peter managed to convince Mr. Stark that the apology could wait until the next day; because he really needed a shower, and was famished when they got back to his apartment. Besides, Peter hoped that Ned and Michelle’s anger would wane a bit if he gave it more time.

Also, he needed the time to come up with a good apology. Ned was a great friend, but he could hold a grudge like no one else Peter knew. And it was the first time he had ever fought with MJ (he was kind of terrified of her, to be honest). He spent the whole trip to the school trying to think what to say and how to make it up to them, when he saw Michelle getting out of her parent’s car. This it’s it, he thought, you can’t postpone this, Peter. He breathed in a few times and started to walk again.

“MJ!” he called, making her stop. He caught up to her and swallowed. “I just wanted to say, thank you. For- for yesterday.” She gave him a Look and he fidgeted. “I really appreciate what you did for me and…I-I’m sorry for being…”he drifted, not sure how to continue.

“…a jerk?” she asked, lifting an eyebrow. He flushed.

“Yeah, among other things. It’s just…too much all of the sudden, you know? My aunt found out the other day and now you and-” he saw MJ smile and stopped. “What?”

“Peter, do you really think I didn’t know about it? Or at least strongly suspected?”

“Wha-what? How?” Peter asked, flabbergasted.

“Well, there are a lot of things. Like you suddenly disappearing for the ‘Stark Internship Retreat’ you went to, that coincidentally matched the date Spider-Man was seen in Germany. The new suit (that it’s obviously Stark tech) that Spider-Man wore ever since, that coincides with you getting the internship. You leaving band practice and dropping out of the team; while Spider-Man is seen more and more often.” Peter’s jaw was in the floor, but Michelle just kept going. “You just showed up and asked to rejoin before we went to Washington, never made it to the competition, and Spider-Man just showing up to save the team, despite the fact that, with the exception of Germany, he was never seen outside of New York. The Ferry accident and you losing the Stark Internship and Spider-Man disappearing all at the same time. You going back to normal while Spider-Man is out of commission. Spider-Man fighting a supervillain in pijamas-”

“Okay, okay, I get it!” he yelled, looking around to see if anyone was listening to her monologue. No one was, luckily. “You know me very well.” He said, still amazed. She rolled her eyes.

“More like you are really obvious, Parker. I think that anyone in this school could easily found out if they were willing to believe Spider-Man could be a teenager.”

“Okay, then.” He fidgeted. “Thank you for keeping my secret. And I’m sorry, again.”

“Who says I haven’t already told the police?” she asked, with a completely straight face. Peter felt his heart stop-“Just kidding. As long as you don’t expect me to keep saving your ass and cleaning your mess, we’re good.” With that she patted him in the arm and walked into the building.

One down, one to go, Peter thought, nervous. He swallowed and climbed the stairs.

---{}---

Ned’s apology was very anticlimactic. He wouldn’t let Peter apologize per se, cutting him off midway to talk to someone else, or walking away or sitting in a different place or changing seat partners. He went as far as putting on headphones when he saw Peter coming in the hallways and dialing the volume all the way up, knowing that the other teen couldn’t stand such loud music for long.

Peter lived with his hearth in his throat the whole day, fearing that Mr. Stark might be wrong and he had lost his best friend for being a stubborn ass.

Finally, before the last period, Ned let the other teen approach, but didn’t look at him. Peter was biting his lip not to blurt everything he wanted to say, but when Ned finally looked at him and nodded, he couldn’t hold it back anymore.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry! I was a jerk and an idiot and I don’t know what I was thinking because you are my best friend and the only person I’d want to be my guy in the chair and I wanted to say thank you too; because you care and you looked for a way to help me because I needed it, even when I didn’t want it and please don’t hate me I just really want to go back to being friends.”

There was a tense pause and Peter could hear his heartbeat going crazier every second.

“First, I acknowledge your apology,” When Peter opened his mouth Ned lifted a finger and continued: “but I don’t accept it yet. Second, I want you to actually listen to my advice and not just brush it off.” Enthusiastic nodding “Third, and the most important thing, I want to meet the Vision.” At Peter’s expression, Ned rushed to clarify “Of course I want to see the whole Compound and meet Mr. Stark too, but the Vision is just so cool.”

When Peter saw the amused and eager expression on his friend’s face, he knew he was forgiven. So he nodded and they did their secret handshake.

“I should have known that would be your price. Fortunately, Mr. Stark agreed to take you to the Compound and give you a few hacking classes; so I guess you’ll meet Vision (and Rhodey and Happy) soon enough.”

“Sweet!” Ned said, overjoyed. “Apology accepted.” He winked.

While Ned and Peter were still waiting for the ring to go to class; the ‘spidey-sense’ activated. The hallways were beginning to fill with whispers and exclamations of shock. Everybody was watching something on their cells; watching the same stream. Peter quickly approached the closest phone and paid attention.

“In the Ridgewood Savings Bank, the situation is going from bad to worse. A few hostages have been released, but just moments ago we heard gunshots. There’s no visual for the SWAT team and the Accords Pannel are not letting the Avengers help yet. Thermal images might be able to help the police, but-”

“I have to go” said Peter to Ned. The other teen nodded, already turning and walking towards the computer lab. Peter ran to the bathroom and escaped through the window. He wouldn’t change near his school, not after what Michelle told him.

---{}---

---{}---

---{}---

“You should contact Mr. Stark, Peter.” Karen suggested, sounding insecure.

“Karen-”

“[She’s right, man. The last time we tried to do this alone it didn’t end very well.]” Ned said, as he analyzed the live footage of the suit.

“It’d be useless. The Panel won’t let him help; and if he knows I am in ‘danger’, Mr. Stark would break the Accords trying to help me. I can’t let that happen.” Peter refused.

“Peter-” the AI started.

“Guys-”

“[Alright; how about this: you go in with us as back-up, but the second something goes wrong, I call Mr. Stark. And that’s it.]” Ned said, inflexible.

“Okay, okay.” He breathed in and out a few times. “Let’s do this.” With that, he shot a web and jumped. He was inside the bank in a few seconds.

---{}---

“Crap, crap, crap, crap” muttered Ned, while he frantically tried to get back Peter’s visual, or audio, or anything. He decided to call Mr. Stark anyways.

“Mr. Sta-”

“Please tell me that red blur that entered the building three minutes ago was not Spider-Man.” The inventor said as soon as the line connected.

“…”

“Damn it, kid! What the hell were you two thinking!?”

“The news said that the Panel wouldn’t let you go; so Peter tried to help!”

“The Panel didn’t let me, because we think this is a set-up. The ‘hostages’ have no backgrounds, no names, nothing.”

“Crap.”

“Yeah, pretty much.” Mr. Stark sighed. “Okay, how is it looking in there?”

“…” Ned swallowed. “That’s the reason I called you. I lost contact with Peter and Karen 50 seconds ago.”

“And you’re just telling me this now!?” he swore in a few different languages and talked quickly with someone “I swear, teenagers are the fucking worst thing to ever happen to humanity. What the hell was I thinking? Alright, kid, I’m going in.”

“Good luck, Mr. Stark.” Ned said, mainly because he didn’t know what else to say. He’d have to look up cool phrases from like, Q or Oracle.

---{}---

Tony was getting really tired of feeling like his heart was going to burst out of his chest from worry. This was one of the reasons why he had never tried to procreate. First Harley managed to reverse-engineer his armor to ‘watch your back, since you clearly can’t do it on your own’; and now this? I swear I’m gonna ground him so bad…he paused himself right there, before he continued the thought. Damn, I do sound like a worried dad. He closed the door he had to melt to enter the building, and started walking, trying to hear Peter. The kid never shut up and he chose now to be quiet?  

Suddenly he heard a ‘clang’ to his back, and when he was turning, someone shot a device that stuck to his armor, and started to power everything down. This must be what happened to Peter. His suit isn’t equipped to deal with an EMP that can take my armor out. A brunet woman (he could have considered her beautiful, if her cruel smile wasn’t so off putting) appeared from the shadows.

“Hello, Mr. Stark. So nice of you to join us. I was hoping to avoid seeing you, but my soldiers seem unable to take on the little spider.” She said, looking furious. The man standing beside her shivered. Yeah, Tony wouldn’t want to be in his shoes.

“So you did all of this to get him?” Iron Man asked, trying to stall. The armor was rebooting, but that would take a few moments. He was also curious, trying to seize up the threat. Meanwhile, Spider-Man was on the first floor, dodging the blasts and the darts of the soldiers. Tony really needed to help him.

“Of course! It’s so blatantly obvious that your ‘Spider-Man’ is a child still. It was so easy to design a trap that would make him crawl out.” the green-clad woman gloated “He’s as strong as Captain America (some say even stronger) and has a few other abilities that we can use. After the terrible loss of our Winter Soldiers, well…we need another test subject.” Tony’s eyes widen and his mind froze for a second. “No witty come backs, Stark? This kid must really mean a lot to you.” A sick grin spread across her face “Even better. You will lose your life at the hands of this child; once we are through with his conditioning. Just as you lost your parents to the first Winter Soldier.” Her laugh was cut short when she had to get out of the way of a repulsor blast.

“Stay.the hell.away.from my kid!” Tony yelled, shooting the missiles in his shoulders at the goons that were protecting this ‘Madame Hydra’ (oh, he liked that; he was going with that for the press conference).

The ensuing chaos was utterly unavoidable and completely rewarding. Peter took advantage of the distraction he caused to trap some goons on his webs. He might not be able to use the web-shooters, but the web-fluid is powerful and not much was needed to completely cover half the men in the substance.

Meanwhile, Tony busied himself with shooting at the obviously more experienced fighters that were covering for Madame Hydra’s exit. He taked out the EMP gun first; and subsequently he shot at their knees and middle, trying to incapacitate them and not particularly caring if they lived of not after this.

Then he went after the woman. She threw a grenade at him but he slapped it to the side, towards a group of men that were trying to creep on Peter. He caught up to her when she was reaching the door; hurling her back at the centre of the building. He cuffed her hands and feet and turned around to help the kid, only to find him casually (too casually) leaning against a pillar. There were dozens of men completely covered in webs: hanging from the ceiling and other pillars, stuck to the floor or the walls and (Tony’s favorite) a huge bundle of web, people and elements (parts of guns and debriefs) just moving around, because the men inside couldn’t separate themselves from the others or from that particular piece of whatever that was poking them. When Madame Hydra started throwing insults and screeching about HYDRA’s superiority, Peter grabbed a bit of web and taped her mouth shut.

Tony just shook his head and laughed. Explaining the property damage and why exactly he went in without explicit permission to the Panel might be a problem; but at least SWAT, the NYPD and the media were going to have a good day.

Kids, the genius thought, even if they are reckless and stubborn and a pain in my ass, sometimes they have good ideas.

---{}---

After calling the SWAT team in and explaining the situation so that they would focus on the real bad guys; Tony steered Spider-Man away from where he was explaining to a few officers how many men there actually were in the bank right now (with all the webbing, they can’t really tell).

“So” Peter started, and somehow Tony knew that there was a smug smile behind his mask. “Are we ‘there’ yet?”

Tony laughed.

“Yeah, kid, we are there.” He answered, chuckling. He stretched an arm and pulled the kid to his chest, hugging him tight. Peter didn’t seem to care the hard metal of the suit; he just squeezed harder, so that Tony would feel it.

They were dirty and sweaty and hurting in places they shouldn’t be hurting; but they were whole and they were alive. Peter was safe, this fucking organization lost. And so will any other that might want to take his kid away.

Problems might still arise; with the Panel, the cops, etc. But for now it was okay.

It was enough. They deserved this.

---{}---

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#peter & tony big bang #iron dad #spider son #xD #peter parker #tony stark #ned leeds #may parker #michelle jones #breyito writes

[liagibasunandmoonflower]

So, some backstory is neccessary (imo) for some of the ideas in my album to really make sense. (TRIGGER WARNING- it gets dark, and is about mental health, so if you arent in a great place maybe dont read, but it's your call)

I am the youngest of 3 biological siblings, but a total of 6 siblings, but one of them no longer remains in contact with us. And the other is incarcerared. But, my sister's are pretty freaking awesome people.(btw My parents basically raised my mom's step sister's children, so i really consider them to be my siblings). My oldest brother (bio bro) was 11 years older than me, my eldest sister and first born of my parents is 13 years older than me, my second sister is a blessed middle child and is 7 years older than me, and my youngest brother is 5 years older than me. Needless to say i was the baby of the family and treated as such 😂

Moving on, my oldest brother was 17 when he enlisted in the Army. He needed my parents permission. They talked it was what he wanted to do and so he went. I was 6, and omg it was terrible. My mom has found old school journals of me writing about how much I miss my brother. I would have really bad nightmares as a kid (up until i was 11 i slept in my parents room on a little blanket bed on the floor because of how terrifying these nightmares were i didnt want to be alone at night). And i would cry at night. And i wouldn't really be sure why. But it would be so intense and i just could not stop.

And my family would surprise me, and other people in the family, when he was on leave. He would just walk in the door late at night and everybody would be crying and be so happy and excited. One time he came home and my parent kept me home from school for the morning, and i was like "okay im ready to go to school" and they were like "let's just wait a minute" and i was like "um weird but okay" and then some time later, i hear the basement door in our kitchen open and this dude walks around the kitchen corner into the living room and then as he came closer i realized it was my brother and i was so excited and happy and im sure i probably cried.

But dont get it twisted. My brother was a dickhead. Like one time we jumping on the trampoline and he was just tormenting me and i finally broke down and called him an asshate because he kept calling me an asshole and i thought he was saying asshat (tbh he probably was, he was weird, it's were i get it from).

But anyways, when he finally got out of the military, I think it was only 2-3 years but for a 6 year old that's forever, he still lived with my parents and me and my other brother. And then he went to work for the gas companies and we would go visit him when he was out of town on the job. Dickhead was always leaving.

But, Dickhead was also one of my most favorite people I have ever known or met on this planet. I used to take dance lessons and every year they would put on a spring show and i was apart of it one year. We had an afternoon and evening show. My parents and grandparents and i think my sister and aunt and cousin probably all came for the afternoon show. Somehow it got arranged that my older brother would pick me up from the evening show (i think he still lived with us im gonna have to check with my parents). Well, the show was running later than expected and so he came at the time he was supposed to and i was still dancing, so he got to see the second half of the show for free. And then, we bullshitted in the car, called each other foul names as was the usual and laughed about it, and then he took me to the local Wegmans, and used pocket change to get us some gummy cherries. And he showed me this neat trick where if you hold the bag up just a little you can get the candy for a cheaper price. I'm pretty sure my 13 year old self thought this was totally badass and amazing. Still kind of do. Fuck capitalism. And so he's driving us home, its dark out by now, we're eating the gummy cherries and he says they look like dogballsacks. So now, that's what we called them the rest of the ride home. It was really great that he just did that for me. And he actually sat and watched the show. He could have easily turned around and waited outside in his car. His red Cadillac.

Anyways, he eventually moves out, gets an aparment near my aunts house, moves out of that apartment into a new one, his gf moves in with him, and he starts taking classes at the local college. Just gen eds, he planned on transferring to get a degree in nanotechnology. I was in high school, and one time we switched homework because he hated math and I hated english, but i didnt know how the college math class he was taking wanted me to solve the problems so basically i got him to do my hw, and he still had to do his hw too. But I'm pretty sure I had to add to mine too because my hs english teacher wanted us to annotate a certain way and shit. That was in tenth grade I think.

In 2014, the same year, my eldest brother took his life. He was 26, a few weeks shy of 27. I was 15 at the time and immediately stopped attending public school, and eventually made a full transition to home bound. It's where a teacher comes to your house and brings your work and tutors you like two-three times a week. It was really nice, but really isolating and lonely. I started tsking antidepressants and going to therapy, both individual and family, but stopped all three of those things eventually all at different times for different reasons. For my junior year i did online school through the local hs. It sucked. It was terrible. Probably the worst i ever did academically. Like C's and D's started popping up with my A's and B's. I just wasnt learning and wasnt understsnding and didnt feel comfortable reaching out for help.

I would say I've pretty much been in emotional turmoil since I became counsious and could remember things. Yes. It is all in my head, but that's the problem. And now, im ready to get professional help. Because i want to remember my brother. Every single memory of him i want to always keep. But I've spent a really long time trying to actively forget and black out the memories because it just hurts so fucking much almost all the fucking time. I feel like ive been burning my brain away with marijuana just to survive. And now im ready to change and need the help to change. But i have no money to pay for that help. And my insurance does not cover it fully which is what i need. So, im just out here, trying my best and living my life. Im always going to try.

I've found music to be really healing, and have put everything i have into making this album. It's raw, and personal, and explicit. It's physically difficult for me to express myself by talking, but singing and writing are so natural and easy to me. And no im not a great singer, or writer, but it's what i love and enjoy doing. More practice=more skill/talent.

I hope anyone who stumbles upon this, (including my future self) is inspired to do something they love not because they are good at it, but because they love it. That's the only thing that matters. When im old and wrinkly and dried up and crusty, I want to remeber myself as happy, kind, caring, strong, passionate, and i want to have so many memories of peope, places, and things that I love.

#bsl #i #hope #proud #of #me #storytime #family #creativescommunity #music #self love and respect #mental health journey #you're

[anothergirlrecovering]

Lynn 67

Today was such a rough session but I mean that in a good way. I got there before her and she apologize. I was like when you don't have to apologize I get it, I'm your first session. She laughed and said that it was a case of can't find the keys and that she was like oh my God I'm going to have to cancel my session because I can't get a ride to work after you've already driven an hour and a half. I was like do they not have Uber here and she was like OK yes they do but by the time one would have gotten to me we would've already been halfway through your session. I was like true well I'm glad that you found your keys. We both sat down and she asked how I was doing and I said I'm OK how are you and she said good. I could tell that she's reading my body language which definitely said that I was anxious and she was like OK so how are you doing and I was like well I brought a list but I'll try to be quick so that we can get back into doing more real work. I told her about how my husband's job was not secure and then I went down in shame spiral about my friend Michelle and how today he found out that his job will renew the contract for one more year so that anxiety is not there but that I'm just feeling really overwhelmed and anxious because I was really hoping that he would be hired on this May which would mean that I could leave one of my jobs and do full-time private practice. I told her about how I had stayed up until 2 AM last night trying to do insurance billing only to wake up to an email that said it was all rejected because of an enrollment issue and she asked me who it was through and I said Blue Cross and she said that she's been asking her other coworkers about the new system and basically she was like I don't know it's going on but we all know that it's bad and I was like yeah I'm trying to figure that out now. She said it's really confusing for everyone and then I can call office ally and ask him to do like an hour walk through where they explain how to use their system. I said I didn't know that but that could be really helpful so I might try that. I emailed them so we will see what they say. I told her also about how it really bothers me about how anxious I was about the freaking monologue and how long it took me and how many hours I agonized over it and also about how I found that in 12th grade I was a producer for a little skin and also that I did a short play for chapel and how much it bothers me that I can't remember any of it and I knew I was repeating myself but I was like literally people joke about how crazy it is that I remember so many details of different random things and I can tell you so many details about different classes but drama is the only one that I really can't remember and how annoying and frustrating that is. Lynn pointing out that it's possible that drama was the one place I felt like I could be me and therefore it was a good memory which got clouded by all of the trauma taking place or that I was so anxious that I just couldn't remember it because I was too busy worrying about other things or that the trauma has taken it's place and once I clear some of the trauma then maybe some of those positive memories will come back. She asked if I had kind to those experiences and I was like yeah sometimes. I told her that I went with the monologue from waitress and that it's just so frustrating how much anxiety I do have. I told her that the vacation went OK for the most part and it was cold that really beautiful there. I told her that I had found the memories from drama class by looking at my old emails to Candace and that something that also stood out to me that was surprising was how many of those emails, which was like almost all of them included journal entries of me talking about my grandma and how hard that was and the interest back-and-forth of we feel hopeful she will get better and now things are getting worse again and now they're getting better and now I feel hopeful but now I don't and now she's staying with my aunt and now she's moving back with us and it was very chaotic and overwhelming and I think I've really minimized a lot of that as not being a huge deal but looking back at those journals I see how that really could've affected me as a teenager to constantly be so upset and overwhelmed and anxious about my grandma's health. And I mentioned that that was the grandma to the church had said that my panic attacks were a spiritual warfare and that if I would've prayed harder she could've lived. She was like that was the angry grandma right and I was like wait what? I was like I didn't have an angry grandma we both just kind of looked at each other awkwardly while smiling and she was like no you did and I was like what and she was like no it wasn't it like and I was like do you mean at the very end of her life when she got really sick and her personality changed? And she was like yeah I knew that I was thinking of something and I was like well yeah luckily she wasn't actually mean to me but yeah she did do a complete 180 of who she was. I explained how it was the type of thing where my grandma had a Trumatic childhood and then as an adult she didn't really do a great job and didn't really work much and slept around with different guys, one of them being the milkman who was the father of three of the kids and so my mom and her siblings grew up in poverty and constantly having to move homes and change schools and DCS would be called for them being dirty or wearing old clothes and so my mom kind of took on the mom role as a kid. Lynn pointed out that it makes sense then one my mom would be the way she is and hang onto the religious stuff so much and I was like yeah basically my grandma and my mom and two of her sisters kind of did a 180 changing once they found religion and they became what most people would consider stable. The other siblings pretty much have drug or alcohol problems and struggle to find jobs and kind of had the stereo typical trauma life's. She said that sounds like it's definitely something we need to work on and She asked me what I thought would be best to work on today and I was like well yes we definitely do need to work on the stuff with my grandma at some point but honestly I think some of the anxiety and self he feels more immediate simply because of the theater class and the fact that like yes I still need to do a monologue and I just wish that I wasn't so overwhelmingly anxious and self hating about all of it. She looked back in my chart and said that was what we were working on last time and she kind of went through and said we should try to focus directly on kind of what the real problem is here and kind of going back all the way to where we had initially gotten stuck with the perfectionism was with the positive believe I'm OK as I am. She asked me to grab the tappers and to go with that and see what about that phrase is still really bothering me. I explained that it honestly just still feels like there's something wrong with me and I noticed how as a teenager I went back and listen to one of the tapes that Michelle and I have recorded on and I remembered being so shocked because my little kid voice was really high-pitched and had great inflection and I was like what the heck so my voice has an always been monotone and depressive and it was almost like oh what the heck was I like a boy who hit puberty in their voice changed and then also that I was thinking about how my tongue looked weird and how I remember as a teenager looking into the mirror and being so ashamed of my tongue because it has a large crack down the middle and two cracks in the side and I was like you know how in the 90s everybody was kind of doing the whole tongue out for the mirror shots kind of deal but that I was really embarrassed by the fact that my tongue looks weird and I knew that there was something wrong with me and I had googled it but this was before google was huge and I didn't really find anything and how it wasn't until I did acupuncture that it got explain to me and how the acupuncturist was honestly really validating because he said that your tongue splits like that when you have really severe anxiety and panic for a long time and Lynn was like I didn't know that and I was like yeah I didn't either and she stuck her tongue out and was like do I have a line down my tongue and I was like now LOL but it's pale which could be related to allergies or she was like or the coffee that I just drink before coming and I was like yeah that too. She asked if the tongues looks like that from folding it in your mouth and I said no for whatever reason the tongue just naturally splits like that when your body is under so much anxiety and panic for so long and I explained out was really validating because acupuncturist was like honestly have never seen someone as young as you are to have such a big split like that normally I see this kind of split with all the war veterans with PTSD so you must've really had some severe anxiety as a kid and I was like yeah. Lynn said that was really interesting and to notice that and to go with my body and I explained how I felt anxious. I noticed how I have a really strong fighter flight kind of response and how even on vacation there was a point when our car was struggling in the snow and I completely panicked I had grab the door handle and was about to jump out but luckily my husband grabbed traction on the ground and he kind of laughed it off but that's that same kind of panic where I just run when I get that scared and that was how it felt as a kid with trying to get out. She had me notice what that was like and then I started to tear up thinking about how scary and overwhelming those panic attacks as a kid were and how I don't even know how to really describe it to do it justice but that I've had panic attacks as adults and they are absolutely nothing like the ones as a kid and maybe part of that is because as an adult I know what a panic attack is in as a kid I didn't know and so is just is completely overwhelming out of control response and she was like just notice what that would have been like for a little kid to not know what's happening. So I noticed and then I ended up down the shame spiral of how I had those panic attacks that were really severe and would last like 30 minutes or so and that happened for like the first month and a half of my brother getting sick but that after that I would dissociate and so it made me think of like what if my mom was right maybe I should've just communicated and maybe it was my fault and maybe no one at church really knew how badly I needed help because my panic attacks were any 30 minute panic attack explosion anymore they were more of like a few minutes of a panic attack and then complete dissociation. She asked me how old I was and I said six and she said to notice that whole little six-year-old is and I noticed Beth was like I really can't remember what would've happened after the dissociation part so I don't know how I would've responded or acted. She asked me why people dissociate and I said usually because they get flooded and can't handle the present and she said yes to notice that that it was a protective mechanism. And then I started to tear up more and I said well that's a shitty protective mechanism because if anything it just meant that my family and church all thought that I was having this few minute meltdown and then was perfectly fine but I clearly was not fine and so again it just feels like it was my fault for not speaking up. She told me to notice again I was only six and to get in touch with my body and I noticed I felt really anxious and then all of a sudden I just started like really crying, like multiple tears streaming down my face kind of crying and she did the toppers for a long time I just cried and I explained how I don't know why but I'm just always so scared of everything and how even when we went skiing on location I was so scared on the ski lift and my has been was pointing out all the little kids you could do it and I took for panel also is fine but I just always been so terrified of everything and I had thought about my grandma when she died and how scary it was that she passed out and the thud on the floor and I had a panic attack at the airport A few months ago because somebody passed out and I just freaked out and there was the sudden she told me to just noticed that fear and where I feel in my body and I just kept crying and feeling anxious and sad and I explain how it's just not fair that you can't predict and control anything in life and I know that's just life then I hate it and I want to be able to control everything and it feels not fair that I can't guarantee safety and I don't know why am so anxious about my safety and I think that's why I'm such a workaholic is because you never know when it's going to be gone or where you're going to need it and it just makes me feel so overwhelmed and that's probably why my husband's job potential he being lost stressed me out so much and I don't know if safety is just so huge for me and I can't guarantee it and that really bothers me. Eventually the tears kind of slow down and I started to feel anxious but not terrified and crying anymore. I noticed how I have really loves going to church and hardly felt sad because I don't know that I loved it for the right reasons but that I really loved being able to see my cousins and also the fact that there was so much good food that I wasn't otherwise allowed to have there and I notice how there was this craft we did that was probably a cheesy walking with Jesus wall art thing but that I have been really really proud of the sneaker that I had designed and it hung up on the wall for years even after we left the church and how there was a kid Adam who had severe cognitive disabilities and this was before autism was really a diagnosis and I don't know what he had but lots of neurological issues and I remember just being so anxious and terrified of him because he was so I'm predictable and I just realized how unpredictability scares me so much. She had me get back into my body and notice what I was experiencing when I think about that for-year-old experiencing so much fear around my grandma passing out and also said that a lot of this is sounding like I'm intellectualizing and this is my adult self coming out to make sense of it and she wanted me to get back into that little kid memory and I noticed that I feel really anxious and it's the same kind of anxiety that experience now where your heart starts racing and it's just this overwhelming feeling and I explained how like even on the car ride here I thought about the fact that I was like what if Lynn tells me to do my monologue for her and I was like I would literally start crying and say no like I can't do it and it's that same just heart racing overwhelming anxious feeling, which Lynn kind of laughed about me thinking about her asking me to do the monologue but she asked me to notice that for your old fear that that's where that fear started and to notice what I would do to comfort that child now. I started to tear up again I sent really hard to separate myself out from any other kid what I would do and she was like just try and I was like I mean I guess that I would just hug them and try to explain that the doctor is going to take care of it and it's OK to feel scared and she was like OK just noticed that and I noticed that my dad had been freaking out because it was his mom and my mom is just kind of freaking out and I realize that my parents probably just overlooked me completely because they were freaking out so much and it was the day of my brother's first birthday which is usually a really big deal and we were having a big party at our house and we were supposed to be setting everything up and everybody was overwhelmed and my grandma kept telling my dad at the hospital that she was so sorry for ruining his birthday party and I think that it was kind of natural that everyone forgot about me in that moment. She told me to notice that I've been forgotten and then I started to cry again and I was like or maybe they didn't forget me and they intentionally fucking didn't tell me because that's their track record after that. I explained how when my mom got sick when I was in high school nobody fucking told me anything and it was just this big mom is sick and nobody knows what's wrong and then with my grandma nobody would tell me anything in high school then either and then even now with my grandpa's wife who has Alzheimer's, my mom didn't tell me how bad it was getting and I literally found out from my brother who texted me and asked if I had known how bad it had gotten and of course at this point I'm crying and I'm like and I maybe there wasn't anything that I could've done but maybe I would've wanted to call her one last time or write her a card or ask for her matzoh ball soup recipe or something since she's gone or at least her mind is and maybe I would've gotten some closure but I didn't get that because they didn't give me that opportunity and it just doesn't feel fair. She asked me about my mom being sick and what the issue was and I was like honestly I really don't know because what happened was we were at my grandpa's apartment for like Rosh Hashanah or something and there was a scale in the bathroom and naturally every single one of my family members stepped on it and it was accurate for everyone except my mom and for my mom at show that she had lost 15 pounds and she tried to say that the scale must of been broken and that was when we knew something was wrong because that was a significant amount of weight loss. I explained that nobody really talk to me but that there was a time when I was coming home from volleyball practice and I member that I had a really bad day and my cocaptain Christie had been screaming at me for no reason and embarrassed me because she was mad about her stupid boyfriend and I was so upset and I got in the car and remember my dad saying we don't need you to cause trouble just be quiet and go to your room and don't start anything mom sick and that was kind of it where it was more of like don't burden us with your shit just be quiet and keep to yourself and I didn't really know what was going on and I member being really scared that she would have cancer or something but nobody talk to me about it so I never knew. At this point I know my mom says that they did a bunch of tests and things but that the holistic medicine approach said that it was a bad response to antibiotics and that it somehow destroyed her gut flora and that was what happened but I don't really know because with Western medicine they never really found an answer or she never told me anything. I feel like I ended up having another gold tooth moment we're Lynn was like so when you think back on it now your mom had a significant amount of weight loss and knowing how rigid she is and all of her food issues do you think that there's any chance that she had an eating disorder and was losing weight for those reasons and I was like well shit I hadn't really thought of that but I suppose it's possible. She pointed out that it could've easily been something that they were stressing about that I didn't even know anything about our relationship issues with her and my dad or something that could've caused her to lose weight from stress and I was like I really don't know I just know that I kind of was given the sense that I needed to be quiet and not cause more problems. When pointed out that she thinks that I was a very intuitive kid in that I was aware of other peoples emotions and fed off of that. She asked if I've ever worked with an anxious kid who didn't have an anxious parent and I was like I'm not sure and then I realize there was the one really smart kid and I was like crying and I don't know his biological parents but the grandparents who took care of them we're not anxious at all but this came together was super super smart and always tried to intellectualize everything and she was like man that sounds familiar and I was like yeah I guess so I just always tried to make sense of everything and she was like well sure you're really smart kid and I think you were really into it even understand a lot but didn't have the context to really make sense of it and so you just ended up sort of in that ripple effect of dealing with all the anxiety and not really being able to explain anything or understand what was going on. I said that definitely made sense and I wasn't sure. She said she thinks that I definitely have an over tendency to intellectualize and I was like LOL me? She said yeah and that's why we need to keep going back to the bottom but she said that seems like we made some really good progress today and I was like yeah well thank you for letting me cry with you and shoes like of course good work we will keep at it for next time. I paid her and scheduled for next time, and asked her if she had seen the Kristen Bell Therapist a video yet. She said no and asked if it was funny and I was like yeah I think you'll really appreciate it. She laughed and said she would definitely love to see yet because we always need a good joke about our field so I told her that I would email it to her. I told her that it's a parity of a client who really likes her therapist but her therapist says she's going on vacation for two weeks and Lynn laughed and was like oh that's me and I was like exactly I thought about how you are always taking your non-vacations. I asked her if she had taken another non-vacation while I was away and she said yes she had gone to visit her daughter in New York because she was able to get really cheap tickets for 100 bucks and it was just like a weekend and her daughter wanted her to come visit to go see a certain show and it's her birthday weekend since you can't come home for her birthday Lynn figured she would go spend it with her there. Lynn said that she keeps up with like all of the different travel watch websites and things and is constantly scanning for cheap flights and that she supposed to go back to New York in a few weeks but she was like yeah I might bump it back I don't know yet but Lynn laughed and was like I get to be a little bit impulsive when I see cheap flights and then I just go for it. I laughed and I was like well that's nice and I asked her about allegiant Airlines no longer flying at that airport and she Said she thinks it's supposed to resume in June but that if you stay up-to-date with all of the different travel websites you can get almost as cheap flights in general and I was like damn I don't really know how you do that but that's awesome. She said you just have to keep up with them and I was like yeah maybe when I have more time. She told me to take care and I said thank you and goodbye and went into the waiting room and realized I had left my phone on her couch. So then I frantically searched my purse for my phone and checked my pockets awkwardly while her next client stared at me so then I started making small talk with this other client and said I think I left my phone on her couch and then we ended up having a nice little conversation about how this lady has three kids and all the 17 is what's making her forgetful and she gets in and eventually Lynn came out and I was like hey I think I left my phone on your couch and she looked over and was like yeah you did so she went to grab it and I jokingly was like no worries I just made friends with your next client and she laughed and said good see you next week and I headed out.