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#the way it was SO important to have this scene and this explanation!!
hischiersdraisaitl · 9 months
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HEARTSTOPPER S2 | 07. SORRY
Isaac Henderson + Asexuality / Aromance ( Part 2 of 2 )
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currentlyonstandbi · 1 year
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#OKAY there were 2 versions of this post and i spent so long trying to decide which one to go with#and im STILL undecided on it but i went with this one primarily because of the comparison in the train scenes my beloved <3#i'm not great at cinematic or literary analysis but i am great at going completely off the shits about things so hold on to your hats#because the train scenes in this movie drive me insane okay the way that everytime we're shown them on screen#they're accompanied by some important shifts in character dynamic or crucial introductory set ups#it's the fact that we have that first scene with alex (and josh) and nigel#and the way that both alex and the audience are being introduced to who nigel really is as a person for the first time#before then it was surface level understanding . glimpses into the character as maybe a little strange and off-putting but nothing drastic#but that scene where nigel chooses to let josh fall??? that's the first genuine insight both audience and alex get into his character#and how it will go on to shape the story#and then we have the 2nd train ride with them! and the way it's almost like the dynamic flipped from the first time#now alex is subdued and disengaged while nigel has become animated#and i know there's completely rational explanations as to why ofc alex doesn't want anything to do with nigel after josh#whereas nigel is excited to introduce alex to his 'world' and their shared history#but the little overly-obsessive voice in my head likes to think it's an allusion to the fact that these two have begun to blur#and the delineation between their personalities becomes harder and harder to define when so often they're capable of mirroring the other#and then we have the final train scene!!! which has me chewing on the walls! my gohd the reveal of it all#the realisation that alex isn't as much of an innocent victim to it all as he'd painted himself to be in his retelling#the fact that his introduction to us was on that train and so to is the conclusion to his story#that first scene of him on the train lays out the basics of his character - the rule breaker and thrill seeker#and then the end of the movie with that final scene? when you compare it to the alex we started with? that's nigel#that is nigel's ghost wearing the face of alex and you cannot change my mind#maybe i'm just thinking into it too much like am i really gonna give greg read all this credit by saying he deliberately intended#to have the train be such an important point in the film. to serve as an environmental symbol of their character progression????? for real??#he was probably like haha trains go brrrrrh#anyway .#song rec? uhuhhhhh 'tear you apart' by she wants revenge ?#like minds#murderous intent#like minds (2006)
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actual-changeling · 8 months
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welcome back to alex's unhinged meta corner, today's topic: the chest touch at the pub. that scene has me in a chokehold for some reason and i still cannot stop thinking about it.
the first thing i wanna talk about is crowley's reaction, since this is the shorter part. he did not expect aziraphale to reach out to him like this and freezes for a second while aziraphale happily chatters away.
they were both walking and the hand on his chest stops him, so he comes to a stop right next to him while he was slightly behind him before that. his gaze also snaps to aziraphale's face, who is very much not looking at him.
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they were having a conversation, but the touch essentially shuts crowley up and zira leaves him to get their drinks.
now, my question is why aziraphale does it. sure, it could just be an absent gesture since they're in a crowded place, just that he has never really done so before. i think it was very much planned, like asking crowley to dance and grabbing his hand later on.
a second before he actually reaches out, he also looks back to check whether crowley is where he thinks he is. that is the only time he does that, he was busy looking for a free table and miracles them one when he cannot find one - the look back is deliberate. especially since crowley is practically glued to his side, he has no need for confirmation, he can feel him brushing against him while walking.
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the hand motion he does gets me, too. he is busy fidgeting with his hands like normal and has them clasped in front of him. aziraphale lifts them once he gets to "that is precisely the point", yet also already moves it slightly towards crowley, realizes he miscalculated where exactly he/his chest is, looks to check, then looks away again before actually touching him. am i reading too much into it? maybe.
i think it is his version of a little temptation. not only does it make crowley's brain short-circuit for a second, he also gets them their drinks and is now (or so aziraphale hopes) a bit calmer and will take the news aziraphale is about to give him better. the conversation at the cafe did not go entirely as planned, after all.
additionally, something i am not sure if other people have noticed or not is that aziraphale does not just touch crowley, it is a caress. he moves his hand down his chest.
the movement in order:
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bar girl unfortunately moves in front of them, but you can clearly see the way his hand takes. to give you a direct comparison of the starting and end point:
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a good point of reference is crowley's bolo tie but also the angle of aziraphale's arm while it is still visible.
the best part, in my opinion, is that aziraphale puts his hand right on top of crowley's heart. i think the symbolic importance of that is pretty clear and does not require any more explanation, although it makes me want to throw myself into a river. but that's by the by.
to summarize, aziraphale caresses crowley's heart chest to get him to calm down and not go insane over the news he is about to give him. he is also simply a bastard and knows exactly what he is doing to crowley.
as always, this is me going nuts with analysis, but i'm also curious to hear other people's thoughts on this.
don't tell my therapist about my unhinged meta posts or she will probably be very concerned for my mental wellbeing
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biboomerangboi · 10 days
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My friend was watching the show for the first time and they brought up a misconception that I think we see a lot in fandom. So I want to talk about The Gamblers Den and specifically this scene in particular:
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My friend genuinely wondered what Hua Cheng would do and then when they heard his explanation they were even more confused:
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They basically messaged me saying, wait Hua Cheng would have made the bet. He bets people’s lives and some how Xie Lian is okay with that. How???
And to anyone else who’s thinking the same thing or falling for the Demon King vibe Hua Cheng is trying to sell here I am here to tell you, you have all been duped.
What’s import to understand is that Ghost City actually came from making one of Xie Lian’s ideas work:
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Xie Lian is talking about a specialised market here, a place where the common people couldn’t just stumble into without reason and that’s what Ghost City is and The Gambers Den is the foundation of it. While Xie Lian didn’t say hey go gamble, Hua Cheng is taking a risk and playing into his greatest strength and then showing of for his crush is the most dramatic way possible when talking about it.
For Hua Cheng the house always wins! Literally. Or at least what he wants the bet to be will always happen. His luck is just that good. If the gambler wins it’s genuinely because Hua Cheng let him.
In the Den he is acting as Judge and Jury with Xie Lian as his moral code but he can’t just turn down the deals. If he does then these people could go to less safe options (looking at you Qi Rong) to get what they desire which negates the reason he built Ghost City in the first place.
Hua Cheng has to let these people play by his rules if he wants to follow his Gods wishes. So he has to be creative and look at loop holes, phrasing and Xie Lians most important teaching finding the third path.
For this moment specifically giving the options I think Hua Cheng would have taken the 20 years of his daughter’s life. Why you may ask? Well the phrasing is easier to manipulate. While the eradication of his competitors is pretty well laid 20 years of his daughters life is pretty vague.
Option 1) Hua Cheng could take her away from her shit father and put her in an apprenticeship and marry a man of her choosing since her hand is now her own to decide since Hua Cheng doesn’t want it.
Option 2) She has to work in Ghost City for 20 years and is married to Yin Yu in name only (because Hua Cheng can’t have a wife at all or he won’t win Gege) then gets pleasantly divorced and giving a severance payment after 20 years.
Option 3) He could decide life is a vague term and after she dies she has to spend 20 years in Ghost City and matchmake a future marriage between her and another ghost.
Option 4) He could decide what she has to do with the next twenty years of her life which could include an actual good marriage and education. Where she has to worship his shrine and be only his devotee for 20 years.
Option 5) He can literally say I’ll collect when I decide and never cash in.
He can do anything because the wording is so fluent and for Hua Cheng debater and Civil God Killer it’s probably easy. He’s not a demon king, he’s a crafty trickster spirit basically a fae lord.
He’s playing the system and he’s winning that’s what Xie Lian figured out and why he supports it. He knows Hua Cheng well enough even back then to trust that he would make the right decision because he believes in Hua Cheng and he’s right too.
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fourmoony · 7 months
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𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞
james potter x f!reader
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fluff. 1.5k.
Summary: James brings home a baby. A baby that is not kidnapped.
part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - masterlist
...
James is standing in the doorway with a baby in his arms.
You’re so grateful he’s even there, that he’s made it back alive – albeit a little bloody and battered, glasses askew and his face covered in dirt – but alive nonetheless, that you don’t even notice the baby, bundled in a warm, fluffy blanket, wrapped safely in his arms. He’s bouncing his arms gently, probably trying to soothe the baby who’s making soft noises, and it’s really a sight to behold. It’s not until he steps through the doorway and gives you a nervous, lopsided smile that you fully register your boyfriend is holding a baby.
You blink. Once, twice. A third time.
James grows progressively more antsy. He chews his busted lip, winces, and then shifts back and forth on his feet. You have no idea where he could even have procured a baby. He’s been on an order mission for the past four days, scouting possible allies with the vampires whilst simultaneously moving important potions ingredients from one safe house to another, making sure the Death Eaters are always two steps behind order movements. Realistically, there’s been zero opportunity for James to come across a baby that he could just – take home.
“You’re home,” You breathe, because truly, that’s the most important part of the whole ordeal. James is here. He’s safe. He’s alive. Another mission down, and James has returned home. So, you’re glad. Grateful, unbelievably so. But also confused. Deeply confused.
“You have questions,” James is arguably calm about the situation, like he’d expected you to be eyeing him with hesitation – he was right – and he’s already rehearsed this in his head. “That’s normal.”
“Normal,” You repeat, the word tasting foreign on your tongue because nothing about this is normal. “Jamie, you’re holding a baby. Tell me we’re just like, babysitting, or something and you haven’t kidnapped someone’s child!”
James winces at your – albeit, quiet – yelling. The baby whimpers in his arms and immediately James shushes it, bouncing slightly on the spot with a desperate look in his eyes. He’s out of his depth, it’s obvious by the panicked way he’s looking between you and the baby, something pleading in his eyes.
“I didn’t kidnap her,” James argues childishly.
Okay, so, the baby is a girl. And James didn’t kidnap her. You turn and walk towards the kitchen, James follows, hot on your heels. The kitchen is a bit of a mess. There are your dishes from dinner, the bin is full, and there’s a couple of empty cartons for the recycling dotted on the counter closest to the back garden door. But James doesn’t flinch, he surveys his surroundings, but ultimately ignores the mess you’ve allowed to take over the small space in the days he’s been away.
“We were flying over Surrey when Marls spotted the dark mark over a muggle area,” James launches into explanation while you busy yourself with leaning over the sink and running the warm water. “We stopped to assess damage, but the Aurors were already there. Her family was killed, baby. The muggle government won’t touch the scene with a ten-foot pole – not that the baby had any other family, anyway, Alice already checked – and the Ministry won’t do anything except send her to an orphanage.”
The suds around your hands suddenly feel too much. The soup crusted around the side of your dinner bowl won’t come off and you scrub aggressively at it, focussing on that instead of the fact that your boyfriend has essentially just told you he’s informally adopted a child at random, without discussing it with you first.
Well, you know there was no time for him to discuss it. You can’t be mad at him for that. And, really, you can’t be angry at him, either, for bringing her to your home. She’s safe here. She’s already suffered an incredible amount of trauma, and she barely looks more than three months old. Your heart softens with your resolve, and you lift your head to look out of the window above the sink. The cottage you and James live in was a gift from his parents – a gift that had made you incredibly overwhelmed until you found out it had been under their ownership since before James was born, anyway – and has enough room for a swing set and a slide, maybe a trampoline. There’s a spare room, upstairs. Sirius will grumble about giving up his room for when he visits, but you’re sure he’ll get over it with some encouragement from Remus. The cottage is pretty much baby proof for James and Sirius’ sake, anyway. You have enough expendable income to completely kit out an emergency nursery necessary.
The argument isn’t really that you can’t afford to have a baby, or that you don’t have space for a baby. It’s that you’re nineteen, a year out of Hogwarts and in the middle of a war. Things are bad, times are scary, James is gone at least a week out of every month, you spend most of your days confined to the inside of a potions lab with Lily, making key potions that the Order need to work efficiently. You’re still kids yourselves, fighting a war that is taking everything from you.
But the way James is holding her like she’s the most precious thing he’s ever seen, rocking her, and cooing at her, you melt when you turn to face them, and it just feels – right, you suppose.
James looks up, smiles tentatively. You’ve always known he’ll be a great dad. He’s so full of light and love. When he loves, he loves with his entire heart. He loves dotingly and loyally. He’s so sure, standing there. Even though you can tell he’s trying to respect you, waiting to show his excitement until he knows how you feel, you can also see how much love he already has for this little girl, how sure he is that here, with him and with you, is the best place for her.
You take a step towards him, around the kitchen island, and hold your arms out wordlessly. He places her in your arms so gently and then watches as your eyes meet hers. They’re big and round and so blue you feel the breath hitch in your throat. She’s gorgeous. Big puffy cheeks and tufts of dark hair on her small little head. Her tiny lips are curved into a tired pout. You can’t help the smile that overcomes you. When your eyes lift – reluctantly – James is staring at you both. There’s something sickly sweet about the look in his eyes, warm like coffee, sweet like honey.
“We’re at war, Jamie,” You tell him, “Having a baby is a bad idea.”
James nods, “I know.”
A beat of silence passes. An understanding, maybe. It’s a bad time to be two nineteen-year-olds having a baby. But it’s there, in the way James looks at you. He’s never been one to have perfect timing. He asked you to be his girlfriend in the middle of an argument. He asked you to move in with him after school when the first Daily Prophet announcement about the war being confirmed happened. He’s brought a baby home out of nowhere, in the middle of said war. But it feels right. Holding her in your arms, James standing so close you can feel his warmth.
“What’s her name?” You ask, smiling sweetly at James.
He beams. He just – he beams. You know that he knows, then. You’re in. For better or worse.
“No idea. Alice had the muggle police contact the muggle social workers, who had no idea of anything about her. Bit of a mystery, really. But we get to keep her. Keep her safe, love her, raise her. So, I think it worked out. Is that bad?" James whips his head up, like his words surprised himself.
You chuckle lightly, "A little."
"What do you think we should name her?" You ask, eyes flitting back down to her. She's fallen over into sleep, blue irises gone from the world and you feel a tinge of sadness. You miss the bright blue of them, already. She's huffing softly, lips parted cutely. There's something magical about the way she's captured your heart in ten minutes flat. She might have magical powers, after all.
"Not sure. We can think on it. Our meeting with the ministry to officially adopt isn't until Monday." James speaks softly, in awe of the sight of you both.
You nod, "We better ring for Sirius and Remus, send them off for a cot, and then coax them into helping us build it."
You hand her over to James, he takes her, and then make for the phone. James stops you when he speaks, voice an amused whisper, lips pressed to her head, "They're already on their way."
"You knew I'd say yes."
"I knew you'd say yes. How could you not? Look at her." James is all honey voiced as he coos and holds the baby up for you to see and you melt.
She's the cutest thing you've ever seen. You're in awe. She's got your heart, well and truly. It's a strange feeling, to have such adoration for a human so small, who you've only just met. But you know you'll lay your life down to protect her. You'd do anything to make sure she's safe. She promises love, in the darkest time. You can already see the difference in James since returning home. He's lighter, full of smiles, gentle, happy. Usually, after missions, James is dark and brooding. He's filled with a darkness that only being a soldier can bring about.
James is looking at her so lovingly it makes you want to cry. She's happiness, and love. She's-
"Hope." You say, the ghost of a smile on your lips.
James looks up, brows furrowed, a question.
"Hope Potter." You affirm, tears in your eyes.
Your heart fills when James leans forward, presses a kiss to your lips, careful not to jostle Hope, "I love it. I love you."
"I love you. Both."
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hedgehog-moss · 9 months
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Various ways in which I have underestimated my chickens (callout post to myself):
cognitive abilities (memory): I dropped some pasta while making a salad earlier and Louise was nearby so I opened the door and invited her into the kitchen to come clean up. At first she just meandered round the room glaring suspiciously at furniture because she's unfamiliar with the inside of my house, then I helped her locate the pasta and she pounced, but before she could eat all of them Morille came zooming across the room with Pandolf zooming behind her, which freaked out the hen who noisily flew-ran out of the room. She stayed away long enough that when I called her inside again I expected her to have forgotten all about the pasta, and that I would have to show it to her again, but instead she went straight for it, resolutely, having clearly kept this important goal in a corner of her teeny tiny mind this whole time.
hunting abilities: before getting chickens I didn't realise they actually hunted? (sometimes.) I pictured their search for food as quiet foraging, busily scratching the dirt for worms, but a) hens are never quiet they're always chattering to each other so already that part was wrong; b) when they find a worthy prey they hunt it with the fierce determination of a mountain lion. I once saw Dru chasing a grasshopper across half the pasture, running at full chicken speed and sometimes boosting herself with her wings Mario kart-style while the grasshopper desperately hopped for its life, until eventually she pounced with her beak wide open and managed to catch it mid-jump. With an action movie soundtrack this scene would have been every bit as intense and gripping as a cheetah hunting a gazelle in a wildlife documentary.
social abilities (empathy): one time Cordélia had a little bit of grass stuck in her eye and she kept rubbing her head with her claw to try and dislodge it unsuccessfully, and then she seemingly asked Dru for help, placing her face very close to the other hen's face like "see that stupid twig?" and Dru removed it with her beak. Again that's not something I would have expected from a hen... they're very disloyal creatures, so it was fascinating to see. They would stab their grandma for a dusty rigatoni but leaving a friend with something stuck in her eye is apparently a level of antisocial even chickens won't cross.
social abilities pt.2 (romantic sensibility): sometimes when the night sky is clear and you can see the Milky Way, instead of tucking themselves in at sundown like they usually do, they'll fly to the roof of their coop and sit there for a little while to watch the stars together. Okay this one may be a tiny bit less scientific an observation than the others but I don't have an explanation for this behaviour; I've never noticed anything wrong with their coop on these particular nights, the door is open, they can go in—and the girls don't seem stressed at all, if anything they look like they're having a nice peaceful moment and I feel bad for bothering them.
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svsss-fanon-exposed · 1 month
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Exposing SVSSS Fanon: 25/∞
VIOLENCE AS COURTSHIP IS A PART OF DEMON CULTURE
Rating: CANON
A nearly universal trope, especially in Moshang fics, is the fact that courtship is performed through violence in demon culture, and that the misunderstandings between the pair are because of cultural differences. The fact that demons mistreat the targets of their affection is canon, however, it is important for fans to note that this sort of characterization and worldbuilding is rooted in racial and ethnic stereotypes.
This is one of the most-requested topics I've ever written on this blog, and I took a long time to think about how best to approach the subject in a way that both keeps to the intention of this blog (referencing canon & providing quotes) as well as raising awareness to the very real problematic aspects of what is a well-loved and often-used trope in fanon that I don't think most western fans are aware of.
First, the canon analysis:
“If you hold unique feelings for a certain person, how can you make them understand your intentions?” Luo Binghe asked. Obviously, no one dared to tear down Luo Binghe’s facade and expose him directly, but this question was really very…unsuited to the demonic approach. After a long moment, not a single person had answered. In fact, the answer was so simple that any normal human could have given it to you. If you liked someone, you should just tell them. Unfortunately, there was not a single “normal” person on the scene—and aside from Shang Qinghua, there also were no “humans” either. Mobei-Jun thought about it. With the paths his mind was given to take, there was no telling how he had interpreted “unique” feelings. “Beat them up three times a day?” (7 Seas, Ch. 26)
Most of the fandom remembers this passage, and some may think that this is where the interpretation of violence as courtship comes from-- however, that is not the case. This passage might actually not refer to courtship at all-- while that is one possible interpretation, Mobei-jun could also be interpreting "unique feelings" to mean something different than "romantic feelings," since Luo Binghe didn't specify romance directly.
The "violent demonic courtship" idea actually originates much earlier in the novel, just after the invasion of Qiong Ding Peak:
In truth, Shen Qingqiu didn’t intend to tease; he thought himself very straightforward. The one who’d tampered with Luo Binghe’s dream realm was Sha Hualing. Though she did have some harmful intentions, her underlying motive was obvious. Naturally, she was driven by a young girl’s secret yearning for love. Otherwise, she would have directed her aggressions toward others, not specifically Luo Binghe. Demons were compelled to viciously bully the person they liked. Only if the object of their affections failed to die would the demon accept them. If their target died, that meant they were useless and not worth nursing any lingering affections for. (7 Seas, Ch. 3)
This, in fact, has somewhat more serious connotations than the way I have often seen it interpreted in fanworks-- it is not merely beating up a potential partner, but pushing them to their limits, nearly driving them to death, and it is certainly implied that it is not uncommon for the object of a demon's affections to actually die.
Now that the canonical basis of the idea has been established, let us move on to the second, and arguably more important part of this post: the racism.
I would like to add a disclaimer here-- I am going to discuss this in hopes of raising more awareness in the fandom, but I am not North/West/Central Asian myself, so I will only mention things in brief and somewhat generally-- if anyone who belongs to the affected cultures would like to make corrections, or more detailed explanations, or any other additions to this post on this topic, I greatly welcome that, as I feel it is an important issue that should be addressed.
In Chinese fiction, particularly fantasy genres like xianxia/xuanhuan/xiuzhen, but also in historical and wuxia fiction, there is a pervasive, prevalent tendency for authors to use racial and ethnic stereotypes against Central, Northern, and Western Asian cultures such as Mongolian & Arab cultures in their worldbuilding regarding the North, while stereotypes against Southeast Asian cultures are used in worldbuilding regarding the South. These stereotypes are most typically applied to villains and villainous groups, and are so widespread as to be ubiquitous within the genre. MXTX has used these tropes before-- notably with the Banyue people in TGCF, with adaptations of both TGCF and MDZS including design stereotypes, such as CQL's portrayal of the Qinghe Nie (combining their tendency toward violence and 'unnatural' cultivation method, with design traits typically associated with Northern/Central Asian cultures).
It is worth noting, though, that most authors do not intentionally use these traits as racist stereotypes in their worldbuilding, especially when regarding a non-human species-- in the same way that western fantasy authors use goblin and orc characters and tropes without realizing or acknowledging their racist origins and connotiations, these stereotypes have simply become genre tropes without that direct connection to their origins. Nonetheless, it is still worth noting-- and worth trying not to fall into the trap of leaning into stereotypical traits in fanworks' character portrayals.
Stereotypes include but are not limited to barbaric and brutish cultural traits, association with animals/having animal features, dark or corrupt magical/spiritual practices, certain types of braided hairstyles & other fashion choices, and originating from the far north or south.
Some of the prejudice and stereotyping of Northern Asian cultures likely originates from the fact that in the past, China was invaded and subjugated by peoples from the north (under Mongolian rule during the Yuan dynasty, and under Manchurian rule during the Qing dynasty) as well as having many conflicts with these peoples throughout history. In fact, the Qing dynasty only ended in the early 1900s, so some of this oppression is still in recent memory-- nonetheless, people belonging to ethnic minorities in China are still affected by this negative stereotyping today, so regardless of the origin, racism is still racism and should be addressed, and China today is a majority Han Chinese nation-- even if Han Chinese are considered a minority and affected by systemic racism in other places in the world.
Additionally, many tropes specifically applied to the southern demons, but also used for demon culture as a whole, are tied to stereotypical portrayals of Southeast Asian culture, which is rooted in a long history of Imperial China's invasion and oppression.
All of those stereotypes listed above apply to SVSSS' demon culture. Even in Mobei-jun's name-- 漠北 meaning "northern desert," which is the real-world name for a region in the north of the Gobi desert in Mongolia.
Therefore, it is important to remember that though violence-as-courtship in demon culture is canonical within SVSSS' setting, it nonetheless originates from harmful racial and ethnic stereotypes. It would be a good idea for fans to keep this in mind when creating their fanworks, and to treat the topic with sensitivity-- but I will leave any direct suggestions on how to handle this to those who are actually part of the affected groups.
--
(thanks to @flidgetjerome for additional notes regarding SEAsian stereotyping and author intent!)
Also, to be absolutely clear: I am not saying that svsss’ demons are specifically coded as any real ethnic group— it’s only that in many ways the portrayal is similar to the common portrayal of various ethnic groups in cmedia. I don’t believe they are specifically meant to parallel a real life group, unlike for example TGCF’s Banyue— but it’s worth questioning why these traits, why these characters.
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I love breathing. Love to be a part of it one day
#shitpost#vent#my lungs. hurt so very muchly#i will probably go to the hospital soon but i was prescribed meds to help first but i cant have dairy 1 hr before or 2 hrs after#i would probably just say that i need to go now but my usual childrens hospital has space issues so I'd be going to the adult hospital#its the same system or campus or whatever but i highly doubt i will be provided access to an xbox or hockey table lmao#also i need to pack up my office before i go to college so my parents can reuse the space and i dont want mom doing that for me#and i know it's irrational but my mom has had a very short temper with me lately and i am paranoid that it's because im sick#so in my head if i go to the hospital she will be mad at me. i know that is silly. but alas i am frightened#it's probably an indicator of something. yk its not normal to think your mom is mad at your for being sick.#but i dont really have another explanation as to why she seems so short with me#like usually shes the best communicator in our family (not saying much tbh) so it wouldnt make sense for her to not tell me why she was mad#unless she knew it wasnt a valid reason to be mad at me! but who knows she could just be kind of a bitch like her own mother#based on the only big fight ive ever had with her she's convinced that i exaggerate my symptoms to get my way#and for some reason she seemed to think that i hated her! which was not true until she yelled at me for having memory problems!#i dont hate my mother i am exaggerating. i dislike her at most. honestly im just ready to move out she'll be easier to deal with then#not to overshare her issues but she thinks i favor my dad a lot because he actually was the one to raise me which yeah! yeah i do#her working a lot was very important and necessary to pay for my health but that doesnt change the fact that she wasnt really there#i dont resent her for it i just wish she was aware that she'll never really make up that time. she just pretends!#anyway I've lost the energy to really care about this im watching schitts creek and i just got to literally the sweetest scene ever#so my lungs hurt and my mom is annoying but this fictional love story is going places and i am dreaming that i get a partner soon#so if you read this all the way through thank you for your concern/nosiness (whats the difference) but im all good now#this fictional romance is giving me hope for my upcoming irl college dating sim
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ineffableteeth · 2 months
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So I was rewatching Good omens and I realized something.
Season 2 brings up Memory. A lot
Specifically Crowleys memory
In every episode something is said about it and I find this really interesting
I’m only going to bring up what I think are major, I want to note there are more instances than this. This is gonna be messy and a little disorganized since I’m just throwing my words on this post as I think of them and read the episode transcripts but I had to write it out.
In Episode 1 we see pre-fall Crowley and are introduced to our amnesiac archangel. This will be important later
We don’t see much of Crowleys memory loss in this episode but the biggest example I could find was the way Beelzebub had said Extreme Sanctions after Crowley misunderstood
It was as if they were expecting him to remember
In Episode 2 we get the first blatant hint of Crowleys memory loss
When Gabriel said he couldn’t remember, Crowley doesn’t say “Well try anyway”
He says “Yes you can.”
Crowley knew Gabriel could remember, he knew he could make himself remember. As if he knew it from experience.
Also in this episode we get Crowleys “I’m a demon, I lied.” As well as several other instances where he lies in this episode.
I also feel like his “Lonliness” is important to point out, because I feel like that goes much much deeper than “[I’m on] my side”
In Episode 3 we get Crowley and Gabriel’s Conversation about “Gravity”
Crowley knows what gravity is on a base level. But he says “I don’t remember” when asked why gravity exists and proceeds to give a very nondescript explanation
Now for Episode 4. This episode is actually what triggered me to start looking for these instances.
Because of Furfur
Near the end of the episode when Furfur enters the dressing room he mentions that him and Crowley were directly next to eachother during the Great War, as well as the fact Crowley used to jump on his back “Like a little monkey in a waistcoat”
And Crowley didn’t remember
All he remembered was going to war
Why does Furfur — A demon — remember but Crowley doesn’t?
In Episode 5 we get one of the most crucial ‘memory’ scenes imo
The aftermath of Crowley threatening Gabriel
When Gabriel tells Crowley “It hurts to remember, my head isn’t built for that” Crowley replies with “I know, do it anyway”
Again it sounds like Crowley is speaking from experience
The most important quote to me though is when Crowley says “I know, looking at where the furniture isn’t.”
Because after the fact he proceeds to ask Gabriel if he wants a hot chocolate
This wasn’t a sympathetic action. It was Empathetic.
He feels for Gabriel, he knows what it’s like to not know
Finally in Episode 6 we get context.
This is where the whole amnesiac archangel comes into play.
Before I get into that though I want to bring up Crowleys meeting with Saraquael. Because something interesting stood out to me while reading her voicelines. After Crowley asks “Do we know eachother?” Saraquael says “When you were an Angel” and pauses before she says the following voiceline “We worked together on the horsehead nebula”
Those were two different sentences. I’m definitely looking too far into this but to me it sounded like she knew he wouldn’t remember so she gave unnecessary context. This as well as the fact she didn’t respond when Crowley essentially said he didn’t remember her.
Back to my original point though, during this episode we finally learn how (and why) Gabriel lost his memories. Angels can remove their own memories as well as have their memories removed by other angels.
But clearly Furfur still has his memories, as well as Shax, Dagon, and Beelzebub
And anytime Crowley mentions “remembering” something it’s post-fall
Adding on Neil’s post about “Crowley not being a reliable narrator on his fall” as well as showing Crowley pre-fall in episode one leads me to believe there’s some foreshadowing in there and something happened to Crowleys memory.
But What?
Why doesn’t he remember?
What did they do to him?
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dingustripas · 1 year
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I just finished watching Glass Onion for the third time so now you get to hear my rant about it but the details are out of order in the timeline because I’m lazy
(SPOILERS AHEAD)
When Miles lifts the gun off of Duke, we can actually see it pre-Blanc explaining it. The scene where the two hug you can see Miles take the gun and slip it into the back of his jeans.
Following the gun thing, we, the viewers actually SEE the gun itself (pre-Blanc’s explanation) when Miles goes back to the mini bar to put it in the ice bucket. Although it’s kind of hard to see it’s very clearly a gun but our eyes manipulate our minds into thinking it’s a drink because it is indeed a minibar.
They show how Miles places the drink in Dukes hand pre Blanc’s explanation but quickly distract us with the groups dynamic and Birdie.
Phillip is skeptical of Helen when she asks for Blanc, we can assume that he and Blanc have had negative run ins with people from jobs. Also Phillip might be judging Helen’s character, who she is, because he doesn’t want to put Blanc into a situation where he’s in true danger. He’s a detective not Batman.
Birdies mask at the beginning of the movie at the boat is just fucking chains across her face in diamond pattern.
Blanc doesn’t have a gag reflex when the dude in the white suit puts Miles “covid vax” down his throat. (Bc he’s 🏳️‍🌈)
Andi, when she first comes up with the idea for Alpha and starts working with Miles, is wearing dark colors. The dark blue pinstripe suit, her completely black ensamble when we see her at the Glass Onion (the bar). But when she’s challenging Miles she’s wearing both Black and white. At the trial she’s wearing a light almost off white suit. Why is this important? Because what color is Helen wearing when she shuts miles down? White. The color white is, in itself, a color that symbolizes Miles downfall.
Connecting back to the white idea, Whiskey is wearing all white (her bathing suit) when she reveals crucial information about Miles giving her the Taurus necklace for her birthday. (Which leads to his downfall when Blanc puts 2+2 together that he killed Andi)
“Im really bad at dumb things” -Blanc. The reason he didn’t catch on to what was going on with Miles earlier was because Miles is stupid. Miles is so dumb that he fucking befuddled Blanc because Miles is so stupid.
Blanc isn’t uncomfortable about his arousal around Birdie when she put her legs up on him while Miles talks about being ‘Disrupters’. He’s uncomfortable because he’s GAY and has a BOYFRIEND/HUSBAND.
There’s a bunch of owls and small trinkets of birds in Birdies room.
The movie, at the very beginning, with Miles mystery invitation box thing hints at where the envelope is hidden. The fibonacci sequence on the box has the center blocked out in black, where we will later see in the film is red which is where Miles is hiding the envelope. For fucks sake the movie even goes out of its way, with Dukes mother, to point out the sequence. (“The first one’s a fibonacci sequence” -Dukes mom).
During the dinner Whiskey is wearing the same golden chain body jewelry that Birdie was wearing earlier at the pool. So this could mean two things: 1. They have the same chain and 2. Whiskey borrowed the chain from Birdie.
Now connecting to my first point about the chain jewelry above. The reason why Miles likes Whiskey, despite her sleeping with him for the sake of Dukes channel, is because Whiskey reminds him of younger Birdie. Birdie even talks to Peg about how dazzled and amazed Miles was when he first met her and how she wishes it was like that again. Then when they’re smashing the glass sculptures, the first thing Whiskey smashes is a sculpture of a bird. Hence smashing Miles perception of her as another person he can use like he used Birdie.
“You have him turn around so he can have deniability” -Aaron Burr in Hamilton (Basically what Blanc was thinking when he walked out of the room)
When Blanc is trying to light his cigar in the “Smokeless garden” the reason the alarms go off is because because just the smoke and small flames from Blanc’s cigar could cause “another Hindenburg”.
The ending scene with Helen and Blanc after Blanc asks her if she’s ready to go home, Helen’s sitting stance mimics the Mona Lisa. Miles said “It all started with her” in reference to his success being inspired by the Mona Lisa. But it all ended with Helen and her stance at the end mimicking the Mona Lisa is meant to represent that. The beginning and end of Miles Bron.
Blanc refers to alchol as offering Helen “some courage”. Ofc as we all know alcohol is commonly referred to as “Liquid Courage”.
We should’ve known Miles was the killer for this simple reason: The glass he handed to Duke. Duke dying holding Miles’s glass is literally like a signed note. Duke died with Miles name literally written on the crime scene.
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10 worst ways to start a book
1. An irrelevant point of view
It's extremely frustrating as a reader to read the opening scene of a novel, get invested in the story and start rooting for the POV character, only to have that character never show up again or show up as an unimportant character.
Your readers will feel betrayed. Why did they get emotionally invested in this character? Why did they care?
One of the most important functions of your first scene or chapter is introducing your main character and getting the reader to root for them.
Don’t waste that crucial moment on an unimportant POV.
2. Too many characters
Starting to read a new book is usually a bit confusing. You have to get to know new characters, a new world, a new writing style etc.
Don’t add to that confusion by introducing two dozen characters in the opening scene. Readers won’t remember their names or care about them; they’ll just feel overwhelmed and confused.
Additionally, readers will also struggle to root for the main character, because there are too many other people crowding the scene.
3. Telling
My name is Lisa. I’m a short, feisty brunette who loves horse riding. I have two best friends called Anna and Daniel, and we carpool to college every day. I have a crush on Josh, one of my tutors, but he’s twenty-seven and isn’t interested in me.
Telling is boring. It has its place, but the start of your novel is not it. The above paragraph could have been an interesting scene in which you showed the reader all the information via action and dialogue.
Unless you’re using subversion to surprise the reader, e.g., My name is Lisa and I’m a class-three demon, don’t start with telling. 
Immerse the reader in the story through action, dialogue and the senses. Show us who the main character is, don’t just tell us.
4. Description
Please don’t start your book with a page-long description of the setting. In fact, I would recommend not starting with description at all. 
Yes, a few lines of description later in the opening scene is fine. But the reader needs to care first. 
No matter how beautiful your writing is, readers won’t be sucked in by a five-paragraph description of a field.
5. Worldbuilding info dump
Please don’t start your book with an explanation of your world’s climate, politics, history, magic system etc. 
Once again, the reader needs to care first. 
There needs to be action and conflict and a compelling plot. The world exists as a backdrop for the story and the characters – it’s not the protagonist and it shouldn’t take up the opening scene.
6. The dream sequence
The main reason that this is a bad way to start your book is that it’s been done way too many times.
But that’s not the only reason.
It also feels like a betrayal to the reader, because they got invested in the story and the character and the events, and then you tell them it was never real.
And oftentimes the storyline and world of the dream is much more interesting than the actual story, which makes the latter look very boring in comparison.
7. Looking in a mirror
Once again, it’s just been done too much: A character looking in a mirror and describing their physical appearance to the reader. 
Firstly, no one describes their appearance in detail when they look in the mirror.
Secondly, the reader doesn’t even know who this person is. We don’t know if we’re interested in the character yet. We don’t know why we should care. So, we don’t want a detailed description of the character’s appearance right off the bat.
Show us interesting aspects of your main character’s personality, hobbies and life. Weave in physical description as it becomes relevant. It’s not important enough for the very first paragraph.
8. Starting way too early
Yes, most books don’t start with the inciting incident (although I recommend that they do), but the start of your book shouldn’t be too far away from your inciting incident.
So, don’t start with a long scene describing the main character’s everyday life. The readers want the thing to happen.
Providing context and introducing the main character is fine, but don’t leave the reader hanging for too long before you get to the good stuff.
9. Trying too hard
“Your first line has to be amazing and hook the reader. It needs to be something no one has ever read before.”
I bet you’ve heard that piece of advice hundreds of times. It’s not bad advice, but taken to the extreme, it creates an opening that is disjointed, conflated and confusing.
Your first scene should introduce your character, story and voice. So, don’t write a single line of profound purple prose that has very little to do with your actual story as a first line.
Focus on writing a good story. Introduce the reader to the book and make the main character intriguing. You don’t need a mind-blowing first line.
10. The lesson
Most books have a theme or something the author wants to say. Oftentimes, that takes the form of a life lesson.
This is good, but the lesson needs to be subtly woven into the story.
It should not be forced down the reader’s throat in the very first scene.
Don’t tell me what I’m going to learn, show me the lesson through the story.
If you’d like to read a Fantasy Adventure novel that does not have any of these opening mistakes, check out my debut To Wear A Crown.
Reblog if you found this post useful. Comment with your own tips for writing a good opening scene. Follow for similar content.
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ghost-with-a-teacup · 10 months
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Hiii LOVE your fic 🫶🏻! I was wondering if you could write a fic where everything that happens in the chase scene, happens to fem!reader but Miguel actually catches up to her & kinda knocks her down. He begs her not to do this, to stay down. As she gets up she asks him if any of it was real, he says it was and still is. He tells her that he thought that if he pursue her romantically then she would accept her dad's fate & wouldn't go against him (of course it doesn't work) she says she can't do that & escapes. He loses it a little & starts destroying everything & makes it everybody's mission to find her
Just pure angst 😭 I'm sorry if this is a lot
𝐅𝐨𝐫 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐌𝐮𝐥𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞
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Pairing: Miguel O'Hara x Reader
Summary: You finally understand the true purpose of the Spider Society; protecting the canon, protecting the multiverse even at the cost of all the Spiders' suffering. But you were going to stop at nothing to find your way home, though Miguel isn't keen on letting you go.
Warnings: Angsty, Miguel gets angry.
“Miguel…what are you doing,” you ask softly, still not wanting to believe what you were seeing. All around you, members of the Society began closing in, caging you in an inescapable circle.
You didn’t want to accept it. That all these people, the ones you have grown to call family would turn their back on you in the blink of an eye. Or rather an order from their leader.
“I can’t let you leave, mi vida,” he says, eyes apologetic but unrelenting.
“What is the purpose of this place, the true purpose of this place Miguel,” you ask, your voice hardening. You had always believed when Miguel first recruited you it was to act as Spider-Man across the multiverse, no longer limited to your own hometown. But it seems there was some other agenda you were made unaware of.
He hesitates for a moment before exhaling lowly, eyes boring into yours.
“The Spider Society…was created to protect the canon of the multiverse. To ensure that in each world the events progress as they should,” he explains as the world disappears around everyone, replaced with holograms of a complex web.
“I don’t understand, what does that have to do with me saving my father?” you ask, and he winces.
You were never supposed to see the hologram and the message that followed it, you realize now. But you had snuck into the monitoring room, carrying a lunch of all of Miguel’s favourite foods when you saw it.
A hologram of your father going about his day, the message ‘Canon Event Detected. Time: 2 Days’ followed by the words ‘Soon to be Deceased’.
You thought it was some sick joke, some prank a cruel spider thought to play on you. But when you asked Miguel about it he refused to make eye contact with you, and that’s when the intervention began.
“Your father dying, is a canon event,” he says. “Just like how every person in this room undergoes their own canon events, their own version of loss. It's what ties every person in this room together in the web that makes up the Arachno-Humanoid Polymultiverse,” he explains, and you only grow more confused as he acted like that explanation justified any of this.
“So you’re saying you know that some of the most important people in every Spider’s life will die, and you just let it happen?” you ask, in disbelief at the blatant cruelty.
“It must happen, to ensure that life continues. That it doesn’t disintegrate into nothing…like how my universe disappeared.”
You only shake your head, taking a step back as your breath becomes slightly unsteady.
“You’re saying that our job here is to make everyone suffer, because of something that you fucked up a long time ago?!” you say, and his eyes narrow at you. It was harsh, but it was true. Perhaps the cumulation of disordered events could destroy a universe, but there was no way of proving that slight changes would hurt anything.
Scientific fact arises through countless hours of testing and experimentation. One result that happened one time shouldn’t dictate what the conclusion will be.
“You can’t tell me not to save my father, Miguel! I can’t just let him die if I can do something about it,” he says, and a look of pity washes over his face as he walks closer to you, but you take a step back.
“All this happens for a reason, these canon events allow us to become who we are, even if it hurts,” he says gently. And even though you hate to say it, it soothes you. His voice always has.
So much so, that you let down your guard for a single moment. Allowing him to come close and slip the watch right off of your wrist.
“No!” you say, trying to take it from his grasp but he was too fast. “How am I supposed to go home?”
“You won’t,” he says in turn.
“I’m sorry,” a voice cuts in from behind you. Jess, with a sympathetic look in her eyes. “I know it's hard, but it's for the greater good.” Looking around, you see all your closest friends surround you, but against you.
“Even you, Peter?” you ask softly, and he only glances away with guilt.
“2 days? That’s plenty of enough time, I’ll get home one way or another,” you say, glaring at Miguel.
“I can’t let you do that,” he says before he tosses a trap right at your feet. Before it can work, you use your telekinesis to throw it back, trapping him instead.
“STOP! ENOUGH OF THIS!” Miguel shouts. It was the first time in your life you had ever heard him shout, and frankly, it scared you as you watch him try to claw his way out.
Everyone immediately starts to move in on you, but you throw your arms out casting a force field that throws everyone back.
Leaving an opening for escape.
~
Running from hundreds of different spiders all on the hunt for you was not easy. It doesn’t make you feel very superhuman when all that are chasing after you were also superhuman, and quite frankly you were exhausted.
Not only physically, but mentally as well. The whole situation was taking a toll on you even if you were trying to shove it to the back of your head.
Luckily everything served as a pretty good distraction for the pain your heart was in.
“You can’t keep running,” Jess says as you leap from car to car on the freeway, tailing behind you on her motorcycle.
“What choice do I have?” you say, though your voice cracks. You see her determined expression falter. You and she grew close soon after you joined the Society, she was truly one of your best friends.
But best friends don’t keep things from each other, especially things as important as the supposed ‘cause’ you were all working for.
You notice her hesitancy, and that’s when you strike. Kicking her off her bike, you pin her to a car with your webs as you snatch the watch from her wrist.
“I never wanted to hurt you,” she says, looking up at where you hung from the vehicle, sadness in her eyes.
“You already did,” you say before swinging away.
~
You were very quickly running out of options for escape. Even with the watch, you couldn’t find an opening to program the watch for home.
As a last resort you latched onto the roof of the high-speed bullet train of Nueva York headed toward the skies, hoping that the force of gravity paired with the speed would at least stall some of the spiders off of your trail.
But before you could realize it, Miguel was very quickly on your tail until finally, he grabbed ahold of you, slamming you down into the roof as you yelped out in pain.
“STOP THIS!” he shouts, straight into your face. He doesn’t even take his mask off as he does, making the whole situation seem even more impersonal. You could only scoff in his face before the hurt overwhelmed you, and you spoke before you could stop yourself.
“Was any of it even real?” you ask softly, tears welling in your eyes as you do. Miguel looks taken back for a moment, eyes widened in surprise as his grasp falters for a second.
“What?” he asks.
“Was any of it real?!” you say louder this time. “Those times when you held me in your arms as I cried, the times when you kissed me in the kitchen as we made dinner together, or when we danced in the living room at night. When you said ‘I love you’ for the first time, was any of it even real?” You say as you feel the anger rise.
“Or was it just some kind of sick way of keeping me under your thumb because I’m the 'original anomaly’, to keep me from going against the canon and your sick agenda that you force everyone else to suffer?” you say, your voice loud now as you struggle harder against his grasp.
“It was real...in the end,” he admits, and you feel your expression drop. You wished that this was all some horrible nightmare, that you would wake up and this would just be in your head and he would hold you like he always did.
But deep down you always knew.
Knew that you loved him more than he did you, that this relationship was built on a lie. But you ignored it for the sake of your fragile heart, and here it is getting shattered all over again by the one person in this life you thought you could trust.
“We’re done, Miguel,” you say, resigned at last.
“Huh?” he says, as though he couldn’t believe your words even after everything you had been through.
“I said we’re done,” you say before you kick him straight in his stomach, launching him off of you so that he has to claw his way back onto the roof.
“Goodbye, Miguel,” you say, before you take a leap backwards, flying through the sky for a few moments until you open up a portal back home.
~
Miguel shouts in frustration as he marches back into the monitoring room, rage radiating off of his form in waves.
In his anger he shoves everything in his path out of the way, talons scratching into the walls as the rest of the Society surrounds him, awaiting his next orders.
Finally, he manages to calm down enough to utter out a single phrase.
“Find her, for the canon…for the multiverse,” Miguel says as guilt creeps in like vines around his heart at his lost love.
Taglist: @beiroviski, @scaraza, @blueoorchid, @remuslupinwifee, @local-mr-frog, @johfaam0, @rawegggohan, @honeycriess, @alexenoirex, @chimpkinnuggies, @rqdior, @banana—belle, @notasadgirlipromise, @6billionyearsold, @gods-perfectidiot, @ieatmunson, @honeii-puff, @wh0re4zaynmalik, @toplinehyunjin, @ohworm-writes, @ishii03, @snowywhiterose
A/N: Could you believe I was going to post fluff today? Crazy how life gets in the way sometimes, but hey, managed to get this fic out lol. Sorry, I know I'm the fluff writer and all but angst just hits sometime :3
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salteytakesonmanga · 8 months
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Your explanation about retconing made me think Oda's way of writing is exactly what bring people to think he has every single thing planed down from the start, even if he didn't.
The story has been going on for 20 years, and Oda himself has admitedly had ideas along the way that he added. But the fact he's still able to connect every new idea instead of having to retcon things is what makes one piece feel so perfectly planned and tied.
Anon, you innocently sent me this ask to share your thoughts and unknowingly triggered one of my rants. I’m sorry/thank you.
Anon is referring to this post.
Oda is just a good writer! He is good at the craft of writing! Even if you don’t like the story (I’m assuming you do, but for people who don’t…) it’s just WELL WRITTEN. People really aren’t used to seeing good writing anymore, to seeing tropes deployed effectively and having plot lines actually connect. This isn’t just me being cranky and old, it’s just truth. People are talking about this in film, TV, books… One Piece has been around so long that it comes from a generation of storytelling that is vastly different from our modern media landscape.
I think people are burned out on the way modern storytelling never delivers (looking at you, JJ Abrams) or constantly jerks people around to elicit a reaction, all for the sake of nabbing that viral moment. When they see Oda deploy a trope or a storytelling device they’re immediately suspicious and fearful that it’ll turn into another unsatisfying gotcha. They rush to look for proof that it’s either all part of a detailed master plan, or it’s just a cheap trick to sell more issues.
In both cases, people are looking for a reason to be LESS INVESTED in the story. If he has a master plan, they don’t need to get worried or excited because it’s all heading to some inevitable conclusion that’s been clearly telegraphed and once you’ve cracked the code then you can already tell what the ending will be, so you don’t actually have to care. If he’s winging it, then the story is just a sequence of loosely connected meaningless scenes whose only purpose is to get you hype about a plot leading nowhere, so you don’t actually have to care.
And it breaks my fucking heart.
When it comes to One Piece, so many people are insistent that One Piece is EITHER 100% planned in advance down to every minute detail, or Oda is completely winging the whole thing. But the real answer is somewhere in between, in some muddy grey area that people find really unsatisfying. They want one clear answer that they can hold up as “The Right One,” but life is not made up of black and white answers.
Honestly it makes me really sad that people can read ALL THIS - pirates are evil except actually pirates are good and the Marines are evil except the Marines are trying to protect civilians by keeping countries stable so that's good except the rulers are evil tyrants so that's bad except when they’re not and then they’re good but only sometimes and… - and what they come away with from it is, “Okay but what’s the RIGHT answer.”
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The thing that makes One Piece feel like it’s so cohesive despite Oda constantly changing his mind and making shit up is that he has a very strong and clear idea about what’s actually important to the story and what’s flexible. Because he has that as a guide, he can add the Shichibukai and change Vivi from a villain to a princess and make up who Ace’s parent is without diluting what he wants to say.
That’s what it MEANS to be a writer. Foreshadowing isn’t “boring,” it’s good writing. A plot twist you didn’t see isn’t “cheap,” it’s good writing. Fleshing out a backstory isn’t “reconning,” it’s good writing.
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ineffectualdemon · 2 months
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I think some people mistake Shen Yuan for being cold and self-servung when in reality he's just desperately avoiding thinking about things that upset him deeply as much as possible
He thinks about his family briefly post transmigration and avoids thinking about them or the fact that he died
He just tries as much as possible to avoid thinking about pushing Binghe into the abyss
Once he does he goes into a deep depression and then ends up being away from the peak most the time because he's trying to distract himself so he doesn't think about Binghe and what happened any more than necessary (this is where we see how badly this works)
He appears to mostly move on from finding out the truth about Shen Jiu but he immediately yells at Airplane about it and he aches inside that Shen Jiu doesn't get to hear Yue Qingyuan's apology and explanation. It pains him but he can't look at it head on for too long
He puts things in a mental drawer and hopes that if he doesn't look at his problems they will go away. It's not that he doesn't care it's that he doesn't have any other way to protect himself and his mind. And we see how he is when he doesn't push it away directly after the Immortal Alliance Conference. He's so deeply depressed everyone is concerned about him. And there are hints of him struggling with staying afloat from depression before and after that.
He doesn't know how else to cope other than to ignore what is causing him pain
But he can't do that with Binghe
That's why we have that scene where he asked Tianlang-jun where Binghe is and is told "I thought Master Shen knew. After all, isn't he always behind you?" (Quote not exact probably as I don't have my book at hand)
It's thematically important that Shen Qingqiu turns around and LOOKS at Binghe and accepts him. He accepts not only the White Lotus Binghe but this Binghe thats a threat and falling apart. He has to let himself see what he's afraid of, what causes him pain. And he has to deal with it
It's not that Shen Yuan is heartless.
It's that Shen Yuan is afraid to face these painful things head on and his story is about stopping himself from running away from his problems and painful moments and instead facing them head on
That's why he's such a great main character because who hasn't avoided a problem until it became a different, bigger, problem at least once?
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happiest-hotch · 1 year
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Dinner for Three
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Summary: Going to the BAU with the intention of dragging your boyfriend away from working all night proves to be a good decision when you meet a team member of his who needs some cheering up based on the ending scene of 11x09 with an Aaron Hotchner x reader component
Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader (fluff)
Word Count: 1.7k
Content Warning: a very slight sexual reference
You're slightly disappointed when you get Aaron's call.
He'd left the BAU early that night to pick you up for your 8 pm dinner date. It hadn't worked, and he texted you something cryptic about a new case involving a longer-running case that concerned the team's technical analyst.
As always, he was incredibly apologetic, calling you as soon as he had a chance, but you don't mind. You know how important his job is and the sacrifices he has to make. Plus, the other times this has happened, he more than made it up to you, proving to be the sweet boyfriend you know he is.
He texts you the next night to let you know they're still working, but he's okay and in Virginia. It's so late that you don't get a chance to text him back until the morning, and you're just hoping he got some sleep during the night, but it doesn't seem likely.
On the second night, he's more upbeat, delivering the good news about his case closing. Oddly, you don't get another message that he's on his way into DC.
With your own profiling effort, you deduce he went to the BAU and got stuck into his paperwork, no doubt putting eating and sleeping at the bottom of his priority list. As a diligent girlfriend, you're walking out the door of your apartment to force him to leave to get something to eat before you can overthink about having never been to his office or the possibility he might not want to see you.
After making it through security and proving who you're there to see, you take the elevator to the sixth floor. It's dead silent, probably because it's close to 10 at night.
Aside from the fluorescent overhead lights in the bullpen and the corridor, the only other light on is an office on the left after you step off the elevator.
It has to be Aaron's since he's most likely the only one here, you reason as you walk toward the door. Gently you tap on the doorframe, but the woman inside definitely isn't your boyfriend.
There are personal belongings in the office, clothing, and boxes scattered on the sofa and table, and two suitcases on the floor, like someone's been living out of the office, and judging by the jacket's pattern, it could be the woman in the room.
She jumps when she sees you, and you quickly apologize. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to startle you."
She shakes her head. "No. No, it's okay."
Then you realize it's weird that you're just standing there without an explanation, a total stranger. "I'm looking for Aaron Hotchner."
Nervousness flashes across her features. "Agent Hotchner is due back soon. Sorry, who are you?"
It's a question you expected, knowing you might bump into other agents, despite hoping you wouldn't. Aaron has told you about how he keeps his personal life, and therefore you, further away from his professional life than he used to, and you're not sure he'd want his team to know who you are.
You also should have anticipated the suspicion in her voice since people out there want to hurt them and could find their way into the offices to do so.
"His...friend." You settle on. It doesn't even sound right to say anymore. "Although, if he said that about me, he'd be in trouble." You joke mostly to yourself.
She looks more excited now, grinning like a little kid who's found a secret block of chocolate. "I'm Penelope Garcia, the BAU's technical analyst."
"Oh, of course. Aaron talks a lot about you." You tell her, putting a face to the stories as you shake her hand. "I'm Y/n L/n."
"The reason he smiles every time he checks his phone nowadays?" She asks, now eager.
Heat rises to your cheeks. You've seen the smile Penelope's talking about when you catch Aaron looking at you before he bashfully looks away. It's adorable and heartwarming to think about him doing it around his colleagues and probably trying to hide it.
"Sometimes." You downplay it. "It could be him getting a picture of Jack."
She shakes her head. "No, he shows us those. Texts ding on his phone, and he tries to hide his smile, and that's how we know it's not BAU-related. Theories about what they are and who they're from is the hottest gossip around here."
"It better be me then." You say, although you have no doubts that it is. "Otherwise, he's got some explaining to do."
Penelope laughs lightly. "Don't worry. He's about as loyal as they come."
You had come to that conclusion by yourself, but it's good to have it verified by someone who has known him for over a decade.
She catches your eyes wandering around the room and explains it. "I don't know how much you know, but I'm on lockdown here until further notice."
"Aaron mentioned it vaguely." You tell her. "I'm sorry. It must suck." It's not the most aesthetically pleasing home with bleak concert walls, generic lamps, and no closet. She's provided you with information about Aaron's whereabouts and character, so it's your turn to try and help her. "This couch wouldn't look as bad with some sheets, and I'm sure you've got some decorations. I can help. Only if you'd like, no pressure."
Instantly, she sees the optimistic side of you that Aaron admires and loves. "Yeah." Penelope agrees slowly. "Thank you."
She hasn't wanted to take anything out of her bags because it means this nightmare would be real, but you're offering to help, and she realizes she could do with a friend. If she happened to stumble across information about her boss during the process, then so be it. 
You help her brighten up the room, complimenting her comfort decorations.
"So, what's it like to be in a relationship with Aaron Hotchner?" She asks you as she fluffs the throw pillows on the couch, and you hang fairy lights.
After ten minutes of non-Aaron-related talk, you know she's been refraining from asking questions about your relationship. 
"Amazing." You answer effortlessly. "He's..." You trail off from your sentence when someone clears their throat, and you turn around to see your handsome but tired-looking boyfriend standing in the doorway. "Hey."
His expression softens seeing you there, but his features show confusion. "Hey." He returns while acknowledging Penelope with a nod as he steps further into the room. The hand not holding his briefcase comes to rest on your lower back, and you lean into his warmth. "What are you doing here?"
You weren't expecting him to show you physical affection in front of people he knows, but it's a welcomed surprise. "I thought I'd come and convince you not to sit at your desk doing paperwork all night."
He avoids being very unprofessional and asking exactly how you planned to distract him since you're under the careful observation of Penelope, who's memorizing your interaction to repeat to the team tomorrow. 
"There are still a few things we need to go over, Garcia," Aaron says to her. About the case they just closed, you figure, but it can't be overwhelmingly good news because he wouldn't stretch out telling her that she's safe. "Are you going to be okay?"
You admire her bravery as she nods with tears filling her vision. "I'm gonna make myself a vegetarian omelet for dinner." She says before pausing. "Do you both want to stay?" She quickly backtracks. "Forget that. You've probably got places to be, sorry."
Aaron looks to you for your judgment, and although he's letting you decide since this would typically be time you two spend together, there's an answer he would prefer. 
"No, we've got nothing planned, and I'm starving." You confirm. Penelope's face lights up, the sadness she's holding onto about her new living quarters feeling less heavy. "Do you have jalapenos?" 
"Do I have jalapenos?" She repeats, suggesting an obvious answer. She moved to grab the ingredients. "I should let you know that I have had a love affair with all things hot and spicy since I was, like, 12."
You smile at her delight as Aaron takes the chopping board she handed him with a bowl full of jalapenos. "Maybe the more important question is will you judge me for putting them on my food even if they make me cry a little?" You ask, nudging Aaron, who knows the incident you're referencing.
She looks at him in horror before turning back to you. "Is there any other way to eat them?" She asks.
"Someone." You nod to Aaron, who's getting to work on his task. "Eats spicy food without even tearing up."
He snorts out a laugh. "You weren't crying 'a little.'" He reminds you, defending himself playfully. "It was full-on crying with mascara tracks down your cheeks. You should have seen her, Penelope." He continues. "Seriously, I thought we were about to get kicked out of that restaurant. The waitress was so concerned." He laughs at the memory. He concluded that night that your crying with pleasure tendency is much better when it's only the two of you.
You lightly hit him on the shoulder to scold him before letting your hand linger to test the boundaries. He relaxes under your touch, muscles relaxing a little.
"It's a natural reaction." You jokingly argue back. "I'm on a spicy food ban at restaurants now." You inform Penelope.
"Oh, you've got to come to the next pasta night at Rossi's." She tells you. "It's the best food you can get, no jalapenos involved."
You look to Aaron for permission, not wanting to agree to something if he doesn't want you around his friends. He smiles lightly at you, now knowing introducing you and merging two parts of his life isn't as risky as he thought it might be.
"I'd love that." You agree. "Ready for that, Aaron?"
"Please agree." Penelope jumps in. "They'll love her. Don't worry." She assures you. "I'll make sure the team knows how perfect you are for him." 
Aaron chuckles beside you. "I don't doubt that." 
There's a double meaning that you and Aaron catch. Most obviously, Aaron knows the team will find out about your dinner together and probably learn every detail about you that they can before you officially meet, and additionally, he doesn't have any doubts that you're perfect for him.
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igotanidea · 2 months
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Despite everything: Damian Wayne x reader
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part 1 : Family rules
part 2: A moment of weakness
***
Damian Wayne was not the one to get scared easily.
Of course not. He was Robin, after all, fighting crime alongside Batman nearly every night, beating the shit out of the villains that dreaded at the sound of his name (as for the last part, that was more like something he wanted to believe rather than truth).
But when across the school corridor he noticed Y/N, with her face flushed (prettily though he quickly discarded that thought), eyes gleaming and walking towards him like an enraged bull, he shuddered involuntarily. His older brother(s) had enough experience with girls to give him countless advice on the girls, but there was only one Damian actually listened to.
Do not mess with a girl. Furious woman is more dangerous than all Gotham’s criminals combined.
And as for now, it seemed like he was going to experience that first-handed.
Or not-
Given the fact that before she could reach him, the school principal appeared out of thin air grabbing her shoulder and guiding Y/N towards his office, not giving her the slightest chance to slap Damian’s face or tear all his hair out. All she was capable of doing, evading the watchful gaze of the most important school official was send him a murderous glance, to which he responded with a vengeful smirk and a shrug of shoulders enraging her even more.
“Mr. Wayne!” the principal turned around following the girl’s gaze and spotting his second least favorite student. From the get go he knew Y/N Y/L/N and Damian Wayne would be giving him constant headaches and causing troubles. Maybe it was a mistake on his part to accept them to the same class. “You’ll come with us as well.”
“I refuse to be in the same school as this *** let alone the same room!”
“Miss Y/L/N! Control your language or I’ll put you in detention!” the head teacher tried to put the situation to order, failing spectacularly as nearly every student was now recording the event.
“Exactly, Y/N. I don’t understand the sudden rage of emotions in you, you are acting so irrational and erratic.” Damian smirked, once again feeling the need to take control over the situation. “you need to calm down.”
“You little prick!” now she almost threw herself at him, not caring about the comments or making a scene. He was going to pay for everything he did.
“ENOUGH!” the principal yelled. In his own opinion, the tone and volume of voice made the glass in the windows shake but in reality no one cared about the outburst. The corridor  did not go quiet as expected, students did not put down their phones and Damian and Y/N did not freeze in the middle of their respective movements with shock written all over their faces. The principal sighed in the sense of ignominious failure. ‘You.” He pointed at Y/N “and you” he gave Damian a look “with me. Now. And I don’t want to hear a word.” He hissed.
“Couldn’t you have just asked?” Y/N raised an eyebrow
“Really, Sir, given your position, you should have developed better self-control.”
They exchanged glances (that were calm and friendly at first before quickly giving way to the hateful and threatening ones) and followed the principal to his den, officially known as study.
If only they knew what was going on inside each other head.
If only she knew, that under all that pose and cold exterior he was actually feeling a little guilty of getting her into this mess and getting the sudden urge to become even colder to not let her get burned even more due to becoming too attached. All because he didn’t regret the kiss they shared and actually wanted more.
If only he knew that below all that enragement, she actually felt like crying her heart out letting out all the unfairness and showing how hurt she felt because of what he did (allegedly), begging for an explanation like a broken, pathetic child.  All because she didn’t regret the kiss they shared and actually wanted more.
***
“This is simply outrageous behavior! Gotham Academy has always pride itself of raising its student in the understanding of social norms and rules of decency. And you two have now put that reputation to harm.”
“Harm?” she scoffed “this is Gotham’s school. What kind of reputation are we talking about here? Last week, we had to evacuate the classrooms because of the sudden leak of fear gas.” She put the fingers in the air mocking the quote that was used in an official statement “we have zero reputation.”
“Well- um…”
“Yes, precisely. And what kind of indecency do you have in your mind, sir?” Damian smirked “this was all a pose for the press, just to gather the attention to my father’s event. Besides, are you suggesting that it was more than just a kiss, prey tell something forbidden amongst teenagers?”he mocked.
“Well- um…”
“I cannot quite comprehend why exactly are we here.” She continued, crossing arms over her chest and leaning back on the chair with a daring face expression “Do you, Wayne?”
“Not in the slightest Y/L/N.”
“You two are-“
“We are what exactly?”
“Well… um-“
“Not to be mean but I think there’s nothing you can accuse as of” she smirked, feeling the surge of victory.
“Your behavior actually make me think it’s kind of convenient to you to bring attention to your two students, isn’t it. Sir?” Damian made the same action as Y/N and neither of them realized how similar it made them look.
“So, what kind of punishment will you impose upon us? Breaking wheel?”
“Don’t be stupid, y/l/n. I’m sure it’ll be nothing less than cangue.”
“Maybe gag to stop the flow of those meaningless words out of your mouth.”
“I’ll suggest burning on the pile for you witch.”
“Asshole.”
“Dumbass.”
They both smirked again their faces full of vengeance and then their eyes landed back on the face of the principal who seemed distressed and kind of desperate, not sure how to get out of this situation while keeping his face.
“So, sir?” she smiled innocently “what shall we expect as a punishment?”
“Do not keep us in the dark sir, we will gladly submit. Just try to think what my father might do if he finds out? Stop funding the school maybe?”
“Oh my God, you had to use the wealth argument! Low blow Wayne!” she rolled her eyes “maybe my father will stop organizing the students’ internship then huh?”
“I thought you were going bankrupt?” he mocked
“Will you shut up! Take your money and choke on them!”
They both rose from their feet standing mere inches from one another, threating to wage a war if the other did as much as blink in the wrong way.
“I hate you!”
“I hate you more!”
“You arrogant, selfish, ignorant, conceited prick!”
“You reckless, emotional, distracting, competitive freak!”
“GET THE HELL OUT OF MY FACE!” the principal finally reached the limits of his patience towards those two. It was impossible to fight two students, who were this dead set on making his life a living hell. And the truth was, that he couldn’t actually hold the kiss and the press against them. He had no legal or factual ground to interfere with students’ private life and if he did, either Y/N and Damian or worse – their fathers – or the worst -their lawyers would gladly remind him of that.
All there was left, was to hope that Wayne and F/L/N would have a talk with both of them respectively about fraternizing with the enemy.
“Get back to class. I can’t stand your faces, but I swear if something like that happens again –”
They were gone before the principal could even finish the sentence, showing him exactly how little respect he held in the school.
***
“that was fun.” She laughed wholeheartedly, for a second forgetting about all the negative feelings she was holding towards him after all the press incident and actually send him such a bright smile that made his legs tremble a little bit.
“I guess we played him well enough, huh?”
“I don’t think he was the only one who got played here.” she muttered picking up the pace not wanting to see, hear or think about Damian. All she wished was to go back to how things were before the gala, the photos, the press.
But he didn’t let her, grabbing her arm and spinning her around so she was facing him again.
“Let me go…” she said, but it came out weaker than expected
“I didn’t do it Y/L/N. I didn’t leak the photos.”
“Are you explaining yourself to me now?”
“You wish.”
“Then just let be me!” her voice echoed through the empty corridor and the door to the right creaked slightly. However before the teacher could spot the source of the noice Damian dragged her to the empty classroom putting a hand to her mouth.
“Will you shut up?!”
“Get your dirty hands of me!” she barely stopped herself from biting his hand.
“You are insane.”
“Huh! You think you’re normal with all that snooty, all-mighty behavior? We’re seventeen! We’re teenagers!”
“And that exclude restraints? Look-” he sighed running fingers through his hair. “You’re mad because now the whole school is abuzz with rumors, I get it, but I’m a part of it too. And I’m telling you I didn’t leak those photos! Think rationally – why would I want to be on tongues? Especially given the fact that it was you I kissed.”
The way he said it, like some sort of insult made her heart break. Not because she cared about Damian Wayne, obviously, but because he actually joined talking shit about her.
“I guess we both made a mistake then.” She hissed “we should get back to class.”
“No, wait! I didn’t mean it like that!” Damian muttered looking down, quite ashamed that even after years of leaving the League of Assassins’ and being raised by his father he still couldn’t quite comprehend basic human interactions sometimes.
“Then how?” she looked into his eyes.
And there it was again. The same wave of emotions he felt at the gala when he was holding her to his chest. The same feelings that coursed through his body when he kissed her away from the main event. He couldn’t quite decipher what it was, but that little voice inside his head (that sounded awfully like Grayson’s) was screaming at him to clear this thing out. To not let her go feeling like he just dismissed her, having zero regards towards her.
And it was weird. And right.
Weirdly right.
With heart almost beating out of his chest, feeling the air almost crackle with electricity, breath heavy and mind fogged he leaned slightly forward, not being fully in control of his actions. Forgetting the fact that they were in school and that they were supposed to be enemies. They were hostile for long enough and he was done.
For the first time in his young life he actually wanted someone to like him for him. Not because he was family (even if adopted), a relative of sort or a useful sidekick vigilante.
For the first time he felt the need to be needed as a human being, as a boy. He wanted her to give him that smile she did a few minutes ago when they left the principal’s office. He wanted to see her eyes shine the way they did at the gala, to feel her hug him and hold him as if she was feeling safe with him.
Despite everything.
So he leaned forward.
Slowly, hesitantly, not sure what to expect but ready for everything, gauging her reaction. Giving her time and space to back out, to run away, to call him names – unlike the way he was behaving in his Robin uniform.
She was not a villain.
She was –
Someone important.
And when she met him halfway, he melted.
Grabbing her tighter and letting the whole world disappear, focusing solely on that warmth he lacked through his entire life. Her scent, her hair tickling his face, her hand on his cheek.
So good. So right. So nice.
So terrifying.
Damian Wayne was --
***
--in love.
@gabriiiiiiii @6000-fandoms @jinviktor @atadoddinnit @celestair
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