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#u said all 3 so i just did a mix
obsob · 2 years
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im like tamftgebka (thinking about maia from ‘the goblin emperor’ by katherine addison)
#mine#original#the goblin emperor#maia i would die for u i would kill for u#u would not BELIEVE this problems this drawing gave me. outstanding#i actually did a whole other drawing. maia and th little people are taken from that drawing i had to frankenstein them#the like. idea is the same kinda but the other comp was bad. like if i draw and i dont have a colour palette in mind i just draw for that#comp to work in black and white. and then if i try to put colour on top it like always looks awful. why do i do that.#anyway. here he is. im pretty happy w it th colours arent exactly what i wanted but thats fine svbkdbgvd#my mum is away this week im playing house and having a good time#i got!!!! more isopods!!! ik i said i would post pics n of my magic potions and didnt but thats bc theyre very small and shy rn skjlf  bless#i got more armadillium vulgare but a gem mix theyre so pretty!!! n one of them is like absolutely huge. enormous.#however th seller was very stupid th packaging for their postage was rlly bad n th ventilation holes were too big n they didnt pack th#tupperware tight enough so loads of babies fell out n died :(((((((((( i sent her a message like. maybe dont do this n she was like oh sorry#n was like this has never happened before but im like. ur stupid. why did u use such a big box all u had 2 do was put more moss in.#they were rlly dry as well theyve spent all day hanging out in th damp moss. poor babies. theyre absolutely destroying some cuttlefish rn#so i think theyre fine <3
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jiminrings · 23 days
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fail-safe (3)
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pairing: yoongi x reader
wordcount: 14k
glimpse: you hear everything you've ever wanted, but you don't know if it's too late.
alternatively, yoongi is consumingly yours all the time.
[ part one, intermission, part two, intermission 02, finale ]
[ still angst (but u can breathe now bc it’s the finale), brother’s best friend AND single dad au, jealousy, yearning from all angles, did i say angst alr (mom-wise and brother-wise), fluff, redemption ]
notes: this is it for the chronological series of fail-safe :-) from the bottom of my heart thank you so sooooo much for reading n loving!!! sharing fs with the lot of u is an experience (and era) i'll never forget!!!
as always, lmk what you think <3 send in feedback n love to my askbox anytime!! | series masterlist
Your trip back home isn’t as rough as you expected it to be. 
Somehow, there’s a huge difference between coming home alone and coming home with Jungkook. There’s an irreplaceable weight in your chest that still flares even at the mention of Yoongi, the anger you have towards him mixing with the trepidation of holding everything in you, not just him, for another three days. There’s an angry rash around your fingertips just waiting for you to pick on your nails until they’re raw because atleast in that way, you get to forget the way Yoongi’s hand picked up yours in the dark.
There’s an ache in you that not even Yoongi and Hyewon could undo by never having met in the first place. It’s long been there, perhaps even older than Haneul. The ache of unfulfillment in you is bred by everything significant in your life — all from your first argument with your mom because of your lack of direction in life, to your latest heartbreak that keeps manifesting into your first ever.
You're no longer angry recounting the fact that you weren't destined for greatness. Namjoon turned out beyond great, world-renowned even, despite living in the same home that you did. Maybe it's not your environment or your lack of a passion that hindered you — maybe, it's just you alone.
Maybe, some part of you had ached too much from reaching (read: loving) too far up, you're doomed to live the rest of your life unfulfilled. Yoongi's never been yours, but the way your heart withdraws from him is as if he's always been.
You've done your share. You've completed your fill. You've worked yourself to the bone to make anything (not something, and certainly not everything) out of yourself that even if you're not decorated in sports like Namjoon nor celebrated in music like Yoongi, you have a fail-safe to fall back on.
You're earning more than the white collars you could recognize from your old yearbook and even if it's to look after someone, to look after Jungkook and his craft, and neither use your actual degree nor make a name out of yourself — a part of you feels fulfilled.
If being fulfilled meant being in the shadows as a manager; if it meant caring for someone in a professional context yet in a way you've always known with practice, with love, through the years– you'll take it.
You'll take the peace of being fulfilled without a trophy than to be listless trying to compete for first place.
You're fulfilled now to be sitting at the passenger seat of your own car because despite having never been to your place anymore, Jungkook fought with you in order to get his hands on the wheel.
You're fulfilled now, even if you only took Jungkook's silly suggestion (read: insistence) of fake-dating him just so you wouldn't have to face your family and Yoongi alone. You're fulfilled despite having no real place in neither men's lives.
Oddly enough, Jungkook wants to be both. He wants to be fulfilled and compete for first  place in a position in your life that he can't even say to your face.
Jungkook holds you right in the middle of the living room, his eyes wide and grin sparkling as if the director had already said action! and the task for him was to act out what being in love looked like, right in front of his female lead's family in her childhood home. (Read: he isn't acting at all.)
“And he’s…?” your mom lets the question hang in the air, eyes trailing from Jungkook’s face, to his bicep, to how his forearm fits snugly against your back and his hand curls around your waist. Your mom visibly looks surprised, although you don’t know if it’s about the fact that you actually came back despite everything, or if it’s because her favorite actor is in her kitchen while she’s sweaty in an apron, or if it’s because said favorite actor leaves no space between the two of you.
“Jeon Jungkook, ma’am. It’s nice to finally meet you,” he greets politely, a little jittery now that he’s face-to-face with her. He’s only heard of the woman she is from you and as much as he tried to picture her from memory, your stories don’t do her much justice. Jungkook’s always loved your kind eyes and your sweet smile, but he knows now where you’ve got it from; in fact, if he turns around right now right after shaking her hand and bowing profusely, you’re showing exactly those to him — that, along with a pair of gazes he can’t place.
Those gazes aren’t kind at all. One is confused and dumbfounded, and the other harbors nothing but hostility and anger.
“Sweetheart, I know you. Who doesn’t?” your mom’s at a loss for breath, mouth still agape as she keeps flickering her eyes between the two of you. She knows that you’re his manager, but what she doesn’t know is why the Jeon Jungkook is in her humble kitchen of all places. He has the most expressive and sincere eyes ever — he can’t possibly mistake your childhood home as a filming set and your waist as a hand rest.
You finally placate her thoughts when you speak, the loaded silence between the three of you (it’s buzzing with tension if you account for the other two) breaking. You actually giggle, your laughter taking the load off her shoulders because you’re happy; you don’t feel an ounce of guilt even if you’re lying to her face. 
“We’re dating, mom,” you grin. “Jungkook’s my boyfriend.”
Jungkook smiles automatically, feeling your hand snake towards his own. His palm’s much bigger than yours yet it’s warmer than you’ve ever imagined, the envelope both of your hands make putting you at ease.
Your mom’s gasp bounces across the walls. Namjoon’s head that’s only been lowered the entire time you’ve been back suddenly whips to look at you and Jungkook. The fridge even lowers its hum to make way for the theatrics aimed at you, yet your eyes are fixed on your mom’s and Jungkook’s alone.
You came home for her and with him. You’re not here for anyone nor anything else because it’s merely a play for your survival, only this time, Jungkook’s hellbent on increasing your odds.
Yoongi freezes evidently, hand tightening around Haneul’s bottle as if it would do anything to release the red from his vision. He staggers silently, breathing suddenly ragged as he stares down at the offending steel cylinder. It’s small. Compact. If anything, he figures it would hurt if he were to throw it at anything. Anyone. Someone, even.
“Wow, that’s.. that’s amazing!” she embraces the both of you, making you and Jungkook share a gaze you only laugh through because he actually looks honored.
“Thank you, ma’am. I’m sorry I haven’t had the time to let you know personally,” he apologizes meekly for a mistake that isn’t even one in the first place, the humility in his tone making your ears perk. It’s Jungkook onceagain with the apologies towards you that he shouldn’t be making at all, and yet, even in front of your family, he persists.
Jungkook apologizes even for the things he hasn’t done, not because he plans on doing them, but because a large part of him wants to be in the actual situation wherein those mistakes were merely possibilities.
“It’s no problem at all. You’re busy getting all these awards, I know how that’s like,” she jokes, unable to stop smiling. “I’m just glad someone’s taking care of my baby.”
“And I don’t plan on missing a single day, ma’am.”
“Stop that,” she chides, shaking her head eagerly. “You can call me mom.”
Yoongi lets the bottle clatter to the sink.
( ♡ ) 
Yoongi hadn’t been able to sleep last night.
He’d woken up in a cold sweat hours before his alarm was supposed to go off to cook dinner for everyone, even if it was only yourfavorite. The anxiousness that bubbled in his veins when he was asleep was going to burst and while Yoongi thought nothing of it initially, he realizes in panic that it was actually pointing to something. 
He woke up next to Haneul and he was placated momentarily, but the knot tied around his heart tightens twofold when he sees Hyewon on the same bed.
On your bed.
The guilt that filled Yoongi then was enough for the bile to creep up into his throat, making him stagger outside to find Namjoon pacing right outside of his own bedroom. His personal phone’s tucked in between his ear and his shoulder, his hands preoccupied scrolling through whatever it is on his work phone. Yoongi momentarily stops his panic to inquire why the hell Namjoon’s panicking and why did he just see a glimpse of your social media accounts pulled up to the screen, your following list staring your brother in the eyes.
“What? What happened? Is it Y/N?”
Namjoon only looked at him with nothing but pity and guilt, the resentment he had for himself bleeding through the way he shifted his gaze to him.
“She saw you and Hyewon.”
Yoongi hadn’t been able to sleep since.  
He didn’t even blink when Hyewon thanked him and said her goodbyes. He wasn’t even fazed when his ex-wife kissed Haneul goodbye and his son only resumed playing with his blocks. Yoongi hadn’t even tended to himself throughout the entire night, surrendering himself to be awake in your couch in the far event that you’d come home.
Yoongi wanted to follow you home, except almost exactly similar to the past, he had chased you out of what’s supposed to be your own home in the first place. The difference now was that he didn’t mean for Hyewon to be on your bed at all, let alone your room, but in the back of Yoongi’s thick skull — he figures that it won’t be enough for you.
Yoongi waits for you all night throughout the morning like a loyal dog waiting for its master, his chest rising up and down in hope yet his chin down in despondence. You do end up coming back home though, but your presence is neither unaccompanied nor for him.
With you is Jeon Jungkook, your boyfriend.
If only Haneul hadn’t asked for his bottle to be brought upstairs because he’s watching cartoons on Yoongi’s laptop, he would’ve collapsed on the floor then and there, uncaring of the way everyone else would be looking down on him.
If only Namjoon’s gaze wasn’t flitting to him to gauge his reaction because it’s the first time he’s, or by everyone else rather, hearing that you have a boyfriend, Yoongi would put his hands on his head and curse until his piercing migraine suddenly disappears.
If only your mother wasn’t here, frozen in the kitchen mostly because of what you just revealed and who you came home with, and partly because she’s waiting for him to finish washing Haneul’s bottle, he would’ve thrown up right in the sink.
Yoongi gathers all his pain and keeps it shut within himself until he gets you alone, catching you by the staircase when everyone else has dispersed.
“I’m sorry. Namjoon told me what you saw and-…” he stops himself when you look up at him with an innocent yet empty gaze, the weight of it (or lack thereof) startling him. “Let me explain why Hyewon was there in your bed.”
“I don’t want to listen,” you enunciate clearly, keeping your voice down because both Jungkook and Haneul are a few steps away. You do it for their sake and not for Yoongi’s, the bitterness in your chest physically restricting you to think about his state.
Yoongi pushes on, breath already catching in his throat when you’re still stiff as a stone. You haven’t even made a break for it yet; he only unconsciously held onto you out of fear that you’ll be out of his sight. “She was in the area because her parents are old and they don’t know much about selling their house here a-and well, she knows that I did the same for my parents when they sold ours. Nothing happened. I just helped her with the sale! S-she was playing with Haneul in the living room while I napped a-and, I just… when I woke up, they were right next to me. Y/N, I swear, nothing-…”
You shake your head fervently, the innocence of his reason doing little to break the seal in your stomach. You feel it dropping once again and even if Yoongi’s right, even if he’s saying the truth, the sight alone of him appearing to be a part of a happy family jogs up all the pain.
“I don’t want to listen and you don’t have to explain either.”
“But I hurt you. That’s why I want to explain,” he stutters. Yoongi’s eyes are so glassy, you could see your reflection in them.
“Oh. So you know,” you whisper, teeth harshly digging into your bottom lip. “I hate Hyewon for a lot of things but not for being the mother of your child. That’s out of my reach. I get it. She’s his mom and that’s that,” you admit, the vacancy in your chest and on your ring finger reminding you what Yoongi had never given you the chance for. “What I hate is that you let her sleep in my room. Seeing Haneul in there is good. You and him? That’s okay because I let you sleep in there,” you heave, voice close to breaking because of how you force it to be tamped down. “I hate how you let her sleep in my room, Yoongi. I-I, I fucking hate it because it’s just like that time I caught you practically fucking her in my room.”
“I-I’m sorry, I didn’t-…” Yoongi sniffles, tears already pouring. The staircase in your house is far too narrow to hold the both of you, let alone your history. “I didn’t think. I didn’t notice, a-and, I didn’t think. I didn’t think at all, Y/N. I thought it was okay for a split second because we looked like-…”
“A family,” you finish for him. “I get it. I do,” you nod your head fervently, your own hand snaking to your lips to stop the sharp inhale that pains you from the inside. “Almost everyone loses their sense of reason when it comes to family.”
“I didn’t notice she already entered the room. But I-I woke up,” Yoongi still swears up and down, adamant on his truth that you aren’t open to entertaining because he’s hurt you far too many times before. “Hyewon and I… we’re not. We’re co-parenting.”
“Still a family.”
“But-…”
“What the hell do you want to hear from me, Yoongi?” you snap, voice finally toning down when you notice faint footsteps coming from the second floor. “Do you— do you want me to agree with you and say that the three of you aren’t a family? And for what, s-so that could somehow excuse you for everything you’ve done? I don’t even know what family’s supposed to mean at this point!”
From upstairs, Namjoon suppresses a sob.
“My mom doesn’t know a single thing about all of this. I-I can’t even cry to her because I’m thinking of you. I’m thinking of protecting you, your son that she looks to as a grandson, a-and even your mom who’s her best friend,” you break into tears, ignoring the baby towel that Yoongi keeps on his person all the time that he offers to you. You sound far too defeated, and maybe you actually are, that Yoongi lets you push past him. “Meanwhile, my own brother probably knows everything but his first instinct is to protect you. Not me, his actual sibling. You.”
.
.
.
Namjoon had been waiting for you upstairs. He’s been barricading the door to the bathroom because he knows you can’t go to bed without your nightly shower, and because he knows that out of every space in the house, it must be the only one left wherein you can be truly alone with no hint of Yoongi.
“We have to talk,” he gets out as soon as you make eye contact with him, the towel that’s slung on your shoulder almost falling at the urgency to which he pulls you aside.
“It can wait.”
“I need to apologize,” he pleads once again, gripping your wrist gently like he had always done when you were kids to get you to listen to him.
“And I said it can wait. I can’t stand you right now,” you grit, the tears on your cheeks barely being dried up when Namjoon, unsurprisingly, decides to apologize to you within the same timeframe as Yoongi. They hadn’t planned it at all — the guilt and remorse weighed far too heavy for them to actually communicate.
“Where will you sleep?” he asks instead, exhaling heavily because you’re insistent on not crying again in barely your first night back, again. “Where will Jungkook sleep?”
“We’ll sleep together in a hotel.”
“Hotel?” Namjoon asks loudly, eyes bulging in shock. His voice is far too loud that everyone in the house (and maybe even your neighbors) must have heard him. “That’s nonsense. This is home, Y/N. You don’t have to book a hotel.”
“It is?” you seethe, your closed fists tightening on themselves painfully. “Did you also say the same thing to Hyewon? To Yoongi in the first place?”
“It’s my fault for-…”
You’re unaware that you and Namjoon are neck to neck until your mom chimes in out of nowhere, her gentle eyes asking more questions than she’s actually uttering. “What’s going on?” she switches her gaze between you and him. “Are the two of you fighting?”
“No,” you answer in unison, unable to fit a relieved sigh in between the terse silence.
“It’s nothing, mom,” Namjoon puts a hand on your shoulder, his smile tight and tense. “I was just telling Y/N that she doesn’t have to book a hotel.”
“Why would you book a hotel?” she gasps incredulously, her tone being the exact copy of Namjoon’s just a second ago.
“It’s just crowded in here, mom. That’s all,” you muster a sheepish smile, your posture slouching the more you realize that there’s no way out.
“I can ask Yoongi and Haneul to transfer to Namjoon’s so you can-..”
“No-!” you interrupt her in a hurry, breath hitching at the mention of him. “No, no. That’s unnecessary. I don’t want to sleep in my room.”
There’s a loaded pause between all of you, even between the door that Yoongi has his back on as he listens in.
“You and Jungkook can take my room instead,” Namjoon insists, his offer only barely scratching the surface of the apology that you truly deserve.
“Great. Thanks,” you conclude, already halfway into the bathroom when the sudden thought strikes you, your curiosity (and limit, by extension) getting the best of you to ask Namjoon while your mom’s still here. “How… how much longer are they gonna stay here?”
“I… haven’t asked yet,” Namjoon admits, the animosity you have towards Yoongi not going unnoticed by your mother.
“You need to ask then,” you quip. “This house is too small to have everyone and anyone.”
( ♡ ) 
Jungkook woke up in peace from sleeping in a bed that isn’t his.
Even before you actually got to shower (and not just sit on the toilet seat whilst trying to compose yourself) since you forgot to retrieve your clothes from your suitcase, Jungkook was already starfished in the middle of Namjoon’s bed. It’s a touching sight atop your own blanket and bug spray that your brother put in for you.
The two of you are far from okay. As a matter of fact, the only people you’re truly okay with in the house is your mom and Haneul; despite knowing that fully, Jungkook still dived in head-first in the middle of your situation. You’ve tried to dissuade him all throughout the five-hour long car ride, and not once did he even budge.
He’s here for you and no one else. He’s snoring in the middle of your sibling’s bed whom you aren’t in good terms with. He’s at ease with you in a province that he’s never stepped foot in, all because he felt compelled to protect you somehow and wouldn’t take no for an answer. 
Jungkook cares for you, enough to write a note and place it beside him just before he went to sleep, telling you that he’s a messy sleeper and to either jolt him awake to move or just manhandle him to the side so you could also sleep on the bed.
You go for the latter, trying to pry him as gently as you could (but even if you just hauled him like a sack of potatoes, he still wouldn’t wake up because he’s at ease too much; it’s you, of course) before finally calling it a night.
You may have lied awake mulling over the perpetual ache in your chest, but you didn’t cry at all.
Eventually, you fall asleep to the sound of Jungkook snoring.
.
.
.
Jungkook may have slept earlier than you, but he makes sure that you stay in late. (read: he physically tucked you into bed so snugly, you probably can’t even shift your shoulders by a centimeter). He wants to pull his weight around a house he hasn’t even been in, even if you hadn’t asked him to — you’d never do, because even as a manager and not as a fake-girlfriend, you don’t let him lift a single finger. Simply put, Jungkook feels this massive pull, not to perform for you, but serve you.
He finds himself quietly going down the stairs, still in his socks because you had stolen his house slippers just last night and he doesn’t have the heart to ask you to give them back. He’s quickly figured out the kitchen, getting a soup started before he allows himself to sit on the dining table by himself.
It turns out that Jungkook’s not alone at all.
“Hi.”
His ears perk at the soft voice that comes from the side of him, eyes immediately setting on the toddler who’s still dressed in his pajamas and has a similar case of bedhead to him.
“Hey buddy. Nice bangs,” Jungkook chuckles invitingly, pulling out a chair for Haneul to which he gets up on easily by himself. 
“My appa cut them for me,” he answers with a smile, shyly pointing to Jungkook’s forehead with an eager finger. “You have bangs too. Who cut yours?”
“My girlfriend. I think she can be a hairstylist one day,” he hums, not feeling guilty over lying to him when it’s only a half, easily-corrected lie. You may not be Jungkook’s actual, real girlfriend, but you did cut his bangs when he asked you to. He couldn’t be bothered going to the salon and you didn’t have the energy to argue with him otherwise, so that’s how he ended up with choppy, viral (it only became viral because he has them) bangs that gained him a few dozen articles or so.
Jungkook doesn’t have kids of his own, but what he does have are several nephews and nieces. He’s the youngest of four children, and that’s perhaps the reason why he could empathize with you. He’s never been through what you have, and although you would never wish for him to do so, a part of him wants to know what it’s like — not because he seeks the pain, but because he wants to know how he could empathize with you better
With Jungkook being Jungkook, it’s perhaps the reason why he’s one of the gifted few people who could strike up a sensible conversation with a toddler and make them laugh without doing anything at all.
Something about Jungkook makes Haneul laugh so loudly, he wakes up almost everyone in the house in peace. Even Jungkook’s attempt at lame jokes tickle Haneul more than the way Namjoon’s ever tried in earnest to make him laugh.
You’ve already slinked past the two of them on the dining table, tending to the soup and the few hundred side dishes Jungkook started on but paused just to talk to Haneul.
“Haneul, don’t believe your uncle-…” you chime over a playful dig that Jungkook makes in your expense, the giggles that had only been filling your ears just seconds ago instantly ceasing when you notice Yoongi standing near you.
“Uncle?” he raises his brow at you, turning his attention to his son. “Haneul, what did I say about talking to strangers?”
“But he’s not a stranger. I saw him in that movie!” he frowns, the immediate awe that slips out of Jungkook’s lips not helping his case in the slightest.
“Still a stranger,” Yoongi smiles tightly, his exhale dragging out as he mulls over the eerily domestic sight of the three of you.
“But he’s Uncle Kook,” Haneul reasons with him, pointing his finger at you. “He’s auntie’s boyfriend.”
.
.
.
Yoongi’s softened a little bit since breakfast.
He was never mad at Haneul in the first place (more like halfhearted because he still stands by his lesson of not teaching him to talk to strangers, even if they’re a worldwide-famous actor, but those are not his words at all) but what he is annoyed about is the scene that he walked into.
It looked far too natural for you to look like Haneul’s mom and for Jungkook to look like him, maybe even better as a dad despite not having children at all, that he thought he was seeing red.
Haneul’s lying on his shoulder as they rewatch Bluey for the second time in the living room, the shadow of your alleged boyfriend walking past him until he registers the accent, later doing a quick turnaround that makes Yoongi ultimately irritated and Haneul more than happy.
“Oh cool. I love Bluey!” Jungkook says sincerely, inviting himself to sit on the lone sofa chair to watch the episode.
“Wow, you’re just so… quirky,” Yoongi mutters under his breath with a roll of his eyes, his snarky remark making Jungkook’s ears tingle. The latter scoffs slyly, making him finally acknowledge Jungkook, albeit sarcastically. “So what do you do, Jungkook?”
Even before he could answer though, Haneul does it for him with an excitement that only comes out whenever he’s talking about his favorites.
“We watched his movies in the cinema, appa! Remember?”
“Did we?” Yoongi narrows his eyes, playing his huff into a cough. He repurposes the tinge of embarrassment that he feels into snark, running a hand through his hair cockily. “I’d for sure remember an actor if they were good.”
( ♡ ) 
“Where’s your brother? I need him to do the heavy lifting.”
Your mom asks you with an urgency that parents only past the age of forty could possess, her lips already parted awaiting your response towards a question she asked just two seconds ago. 
Even if you weren’t engrossed on an episode of Bluey (Jungkook and Haneul put you into it and you get their laser focus now) just now, you still wouldn’t know about your brother’s whereabouts. Yoongi saves you this time, his response piquing both yours and Jungkook’s interest.
“He’s in practice. Joon took Haneul with him so he could learn too.”
Jungkook looks up from his phone sharply, eyes wide in eagerness. He and Yoongi haven’t even looked at each other since yesterday yet their coordination (read: competitiveness) syncs with the other at the exact second, their insistence on tagging along a menial task making you jolt.
“I’ll come with, mom!”
“I’ll come with, auntie.”
It’s not a competition, yet Jungkook jumps up to stand so quickly, his head almost brushed the ceiling. “Let’s go, babe,” he holds out a hand for you, making you clear your throat as you’re still trying to gauge the situation.
“But what about Yoongi? Poor thing, he’ll be left alone,” your mom awes, her pout only deepening when Yoongi pretends to look crestfallen at being overlooked. He doesn’t have to pretend that much because despite not being the biggest fan of grocery-shopping, especially in your area because it always smelled of eggs despite barely carrying any eggs, he’ll jump at any task to impress your mom, and you by extension.
“I don’t think you should worry-…” you start, already being interrupted in an instant.
“Oh come on, Y/N. Two pairs of hands are better than one! They really have to do some heavy lifting because I forget to tell you about that one time your aunts hounded me for-…” she trails off while telling you a story about your supposedly huge extended family, blissfully unaware that there’s two men fighting to open the door for the both of you.
Yoongi’s driving his car as the most spacious option, making Jungkook snicker under his breath as he blames himself for not bringing his SUV which is clearly more expensive than whatever Yoongi’s driving, even if you elbow him lightly by the ribs because you didn’t ask him to do that.
“Mom, what are you doing here? Go sit in the front,” you nudge her, unwilling to sit next to Yoongi in an enclosed space.
“Oh, right! Sorry, I was just used to you always taking shotgun whenever Yoongi’s driving,” she squeals, fondly clapping to herself as she revisits the memory. “Do you remember that, sweetheart? You’d always fight with Namjoon because Yoongi got his license first.”
It may only be your mom who’s leaning against the center console to look at you in the back, but it doesn’t mean that Yoongi’s ever taken off his attention from you.
“I remember,” Yoongi smiles, looking at you from the rearview mirror. “I never forget.”
.
.
.
The grocery store hasn’t changed one bit. 
It still smelled of eggs, the lights still aren’t as bright as they should be, and there’s still trinkets that you’ve always been swayed by being displayed near the register.
You’re taking it all in after not having been back for five years, whereas Yoongi strolls right in, but never ahead of you, as if he’s visited multiple times already since he left your town. 
Your mom and Jungkook are side by side as he asks her a question you can’t even discern, only getting to know his actual agenda when you hear his sneakers skidding against the floor as he runs towards the pushcarts. 
Yoongi, without even knowing the full context, runs after him because he didn’t want to come in second place for whatever it is that Jungkook’s challenging him to.
“I’ll steer the cart,” Jungkook presents definitively, his hand raised mid-air as if he’s being graded for eagerness alone. He looks like he wants to prove himself even if it’s only you and your mom present; no director, no producer in sight who sizes him up. 
“No. I’ll do it,” Yoongi argues out of nowhere, his bruised hands reclaiming the cart under Jungkook’s grasp. He’s not even looking at your mom because his gaze is only fixed on Jungkook who’s just two tugs away from actually spitting at him.
“I said it first,” your pretend-boyfriend forcefully pulls the hunk of metal away from Yoongi, the latter coming along with it for the briefest of seconds before he does the same, this time with Jungkook gasping.
“What, are you method-acting for your next role as a cart-steerer?” 
Your mom’s a little perplexed at the scene before her, lips parting in both concern and amusement because for a pair of people who haven’t met each other before, Yoongi and Jungkook are oddly competitive. They want to provesomething, anything, and maybe everything so bad, they neglect the fact that they look ridiculous fighting over a pushcart. 
“We actually need two,“ she says to no one in particular, thinking out loud as she goes through her grocery list. “I think maybe even three because-…”
“I’ll get it,” Jungkook rushes out in panic, almost bumping into you in the process. You were only gone for a minute to retrieve your phone from the car and yet he already looks breathless, the knot between his eyebrows untangling when he realizes that it’s you. “Oh. Sorry, babe.”
“I’ll get it, Koo,” you murmur, catching the tail end of what your mom said about the pushcarts. Jungkook’s cheeks are tainted pink in frustration and you can’t help but to be concerned, the back of your hand already flitting against his forehead before you know it. “Are you okay? Sorry, the AC in here is not like the AC in the city.”
“Huh, what? Oh no, it’s okay. I just got into this heated cart argument,” he waves you off, eyes rapidly moving between you, your mom, and Yoongi who’s mirroring his exact actions, except for the glaring hint of annoyance with the way he’s standing so close to you.
“Cart argument? What’s-…”
“We need meat.” 
You barely even have a chance to digest what Jungkook’s saying to you before you see him glitch right in front of you in a hurry, the only words to register clearly in your mind being your mom’s. She’s absent-mindedly talking herself through her grocery list (as she always does) and yet the two men right next to her hang onto her every word, the speed they take off on giving you no clue to why they’re acting as such.
“I’ll get it, auntie!” Yoongi gets out even before the wheels of his cart could cooperate, momentarily tripping over himself. Jungkook sputters at that, the laughter that builds in his throat being interrupted because he realizes that the other guy is ahead of him and he simply cannot bear that. 
“Beef. We need beef, right, mom? How many kilos. Like… ten? Okay. I’ll get it!” Jungkook dashes even if he’s never been in this grocery store before; even if your mom hasn’t said a single word to either of them.
You’re left dumbfounded in the middle of the store, your gaze unable to locate the distinct sounds of both of their sneakers skidding against the floor. 
“I didn’t even say anything,” your mom mutters in confusion, eyes flitting to you with a wonder you can’t place because even if the both of you are lost, she seems to have a better idea than you do. “Are they… competing over you, sweetie?”
“Competing? Me? Why would you even say that, mom?” you huff, leaning against the cart as you snatch her list to get the things she’s actually looking for.
“I don’t know,” she lulls, shrugging carelessly before nudging you. “Jungkook’s your boyfriend and well, I assume Yoongi’s always wanted to be in his position.”
“How did you even come to that conclusion?”
“Small town. Few people. Cute girl, cute guy,” she places, the end of her hypothesis being accompanied by a chuckle. When she says it like that, it sounds far too easy — it sounds far too seamless, you almost wish it was exactly that. “I didn’t even take the news that Yoongi was going abroad seriously because I thought it was a joke. I thought he could never move on from here or Namjoon,” your mom pouts, tilting her head when you freeze. “Much more, he could never move on from you.”
“He did,” you answer through gritted teeth, the grip you have on her list making the paper crumple underneath your hold.
Your mom doesn’t know everything. In fact, you don’t even know if she knows anything at all. You don’t despise her for her lack of involvement because you want to keep her from the chaos of your burdens, and you’ve always wanted to keep it that way.
But the way she speaks now, so full of conviction and faith, you find yourself despising it. She speaks as surely as the way Yoongi speeds past the both of you, weaving through aisles to get items she didn’t ask for, competing for and against a higher power (read: you) that Jungkook himself seeks. 
She says it so surely, it’s as if she knows about every waking thought that Yoongi’s ever had in your absence.
“It doesn’t look like he did.”
You ponder over your mom’s adoration for Yoongi, most of which you can’t decipher if it’s misplaced or not. You know he’ll always have a special place in her heart and in her home because she’s known him even before he was born because she’s best friends with Mrs. Min. 
Yoongi has a place in your life, no matter if it’s in your own or in the lives of the people you love. He probably has a modern penthouse in Namjoon’s life, the decoration in it improving over time. On the other hand, Yoongi probably occupies an ancestral cabin in your mom’s life that’s been well-maintained for longer than he’s ever been alive, the decor in it being handmade and resilient through the years. 
In your life, however, you can’t tell how and if Yoongi occupies it in the first place. For the longest time, his place in your life had come in the form of a mansion that not even a single architect nor engineer could ever think of. For a moment too, Yoongi’s place in your heart came in the form of a little house on a vast farm overlooking the mountains and the sea. Throughout all the houses that Yoongi’s shape-shifted to in your life, you doubt now if he could ever turn into them again.
When you think of Yoongi, all you see is your room. 
When you see Yoongi, all you could remember is your childhood house and its shortcomings in your life, especially when you needed to come home to it— to him, the most.
“I’ll pay, mom,” Jungkook snaps you out of your reverie, his whine making your ears ring.
“What? No, Jungkook. This is all too much,” you refuse vehemently, trying to fight him from extending his black card any further.
“It’s not. This is for your family anyway. I, I might have even grabbed extra portions for myself because mom said she’ll repeat tomorrow what she did for lunch today,” he grins, momentarily losing himself to the sight of you that he doesn’t even notice he’s in the process of being one-upped by Yoongi.
“Jungkook, baby, I’ll feel-…”
“I paid for it, auntie,” Yoongi announces, making your lips part and Jungkook’s jaw drop.
“You shouldn’t have, Yoongi,” you scold him softly, a whine already building at the back of your throat but he waves you off easily. Your mom’s thanking him profusely in the background, and while Yoongi’s pleased with the attention, his gaze remains on you.
“But I wanted to,” he insists, pursing his lips. “I should.”
“You’re not family,” is what you want to say.
“But I want to be,” is what he wants to scream.
Wordlessly, Yoongi puts a plastic toy ring he bought from the register into your bag. It’s pink and it’s star-shaped, its mold still the same from all those years ago.
.
.
.
You barrel into your mom’s room just to see Namjoon.
You bit at the chance of giving him the stuff he’s asked for from the grocery as per your mom, taking advantage of her focus on organizing the groceries downstairs to have a one-on-one with your brother.
“You have to make Yoongi drive into the city tonight. Either that or he flies to the US. The reunion is already tomorrow,” you seethe, crossing your arms as he sighs in defeat.
“It’s already late. Yoongi’s driving with Haneul, a kid, alone,” he emphasizes, running a hand through his hair as he himself is troubled by you being in a bind over everything. “And he can’t book a flight back on such short notice.”
“Short notice? What, did he just happen to book a one-way flight and not a round trip one?” you snort in amusement, shaking your head in disbelief. The thought actually cracks you up because out of the three of you, Yoongi happened to be the one more adept to websites despite your limited materials back then. Namjoon remains silent, and with how serious he looks, your face falls.
You can’t believe Yoongi at all.
“He did? You’ve gotta be kidding me, Joon,” you groan, throwing your head back. “What, does that mean Yoongi gets to stay in our home while we’re in this godforsaken family reunion?”
Namjoon delivers yet another blow, his revelation making you more enraged than the last.
“Mom invited them.”
“What? Why?!” you exclaim, chest rising in frustration. “Yoongi’s not family, Namjoon. Atleast not for me.”
He doesn’t miss your added remark at the end of your sentence, the underhandedness of it making him look down on the floor. 
Namjoon feels guilty, he really does, but he can’t seem to make it right. He couldn’t even fight you in insisting to apologize that night.
For each day that you try to delay the inevitable of confronting him and letting him taking the fall, of letting him apologize, Namjoon feels more like a big failure for an older brother than he already is. 
“But he used to be,” he says under his breath, looking up at you with a stubbornness you can’t place. “Your lifetime versus those five years — which one amounts to more?”
( ♡ ) 
Everyone gushes over Jungkook.
In an altitude higher than the mountainside that you’re in now, the aunts, uncles, and cousins you didn’t even know you have squeal over your fake boyfriend. By the fifth relative, you’ve already got your routine down of letting them hug you and kiss your cheek before holding Jungkook’s bicep, acting as his bodyguard to make sure they don’t squeeze him too hard or not at all.
“Oh my god, Y/N. Jeon Jungkook is your boyfriend?!”
“I knew it, I knew you were gonna have a partner who’s famous! I dreamed about it when you were-…”
“If that’s your boyfriend, then who’s he?” your cousin (?) whispers to you, cutting himself off as he turns his gaze to Yoongi and Haneul. They’re most certainly not your family, meaning that they’re unrelated to everyone present, so what your relatives (some more nosy than others) can’t wrap their heads around is the fact that there are strangers in your family reunion.
It takes one, two times for your mom and Namjoon to explain who they are and what they’re doing here in the first place, the chorus of nods eventually signaling that they’ve moved on. Some of them could even recall Mr. and Mrs. Min from the neighborhood, and Yoongi could only nod.
It’s not that he doesn’t belong right now — he actually feels the opposite. Yoongi feels that he has a place amongst a barrage of relatives he’s not affiliated to by neither blood nor paper, and it pains him; not because he’s scared of belonging, but because you probably don’t think the same way.
Haneul runs to him underneath the umbrella he’s isolated himself at, his son grasping an assortment of cash, food, and juiceboxes Yoongi most certainly did not pack in Haneul’s backpack from the night before.
“Auntie’s family is really nice, appa. Look what they gave me,” he shows everything that his hands could carry, breathing heavily in excitement as he explains that your relatives told him to come back once his hands are empty.
“Oh dear. They really think you’re adorable,” he laughs, pocketing Haneul’s cash (he swears he’ll give it back) and hiding some of the snacks he’s been given so he wouldn’t give himself heartburn eating too many at once.
Yoongi’s smiling from ear to ear, sitting Haneul in his lap as he overlooks the view of your town from above. Everything looks so small and delicate, you’d almost think none of what laid downhill ever even mattered. He didn’t get views like these in New York. 
Yoongi didn’t get people like you in New York.
“Mama’s family isn’t this nice,” Haneul speaks out of nowhere, his thoughts uttered out loud directed more-on to himself than it is for his dad. Yoongi stops in his tracks in trepidation, shoulders tensing over what his son just said. “They never play with me like this. Not like auntie.”
He knows Hyewon’s relatives, albeit not that well. Her family members in the US were not this kind, not this warm, even to a child who’s actually related to them.
Yoongi’s stuck in his thoughts the whole time Haneul sips on his juice, finally being snapped into his reality nowwhen you approach their direction. His son waves at you excitedly even if you’ve just crossed paths minutes ago.
“Here, Haneul,” you hold out a container to him, the gentle smile on your face limited to only him yet Yoongi, for a lack of grace, pretends it’s also for him. “I tried my best to make it look like Bluey,” you chuckle, pointing to the mini sculpture made out of the marshmallows and blueberries that your relatives set aside for him.
Haneul beams at you, thanking you profusely. If only he wasn’t sat on Yoongi’s lap and therefore grounded, he would’ve launched himself at you to hug your legs.
Yoongi takes the hat right off his head, putting it on you while you’re crouched next to his son.
“It’s hot,” he explains, his heart continuously speaking beats the longer that you linger beside Haneul and the longer that he giggles in excitement. “I know you get headaches easily.”
( ♡ ) 
Despite being reachable, Yoongi still yearns for you.
He yearns for you even if you’re only within arm’s reach, sitting near you but never close enough at the long table because with you, he feels safe. He laughs in the background like it’s a sitcom to every joke and every episode of banter thrown around him. He doesn’t feel out of place with your family — he feels out of place with you.
He’s never been a wickedly jealous type. Even when he and Hyewon were still together and she cheated on him, Yoongi felt more resentful than he was jealous. He didn’t feel this type of way; he didn’t feel inferior. He didn’t feel like he was nursing a loss in his life because he has no choice but to. Yoongi had managed to divorce Hyewon because it didn’t work out between them, and that was that.
Yoongi can neither divorce you nor pull away from you because you’ve never been with each other. He harbors no resentment for you and that scares him, not because he wants to hate you so badly, but because he feels as if everything you’ll do to him, he’ll take it.
Yoongi will take it even if you set a plate for Jungkook despite unconsciously forgetting what he’s always disliked eating when you were still kids. He’ll take the serving tray from your hands still, uncaring if eating the tiniest bite of the food you’ve passed gives him an allergic reaction because you were the one who offered.
He’ll take it even if you hold Jungkook’s bicep in a hurry when there’s a bug that’s getting awfully close to your drink. Yoongi would walk to where you sit and dispose of it wordlessly because even Jungkook himself is scared of bugs. He doesn’t mind if you don’t thank him, because atleast now when he looks at you from a distance, you’re sitting in relaxation and you no longer have to hold your boyfriend.
He’ll endure the jealousy that burns through his throat more than the poorly-made, highly-alcoholic vodka your uncle made himself. He’ll hold onto the poison that is yearning and how he’ll feel like his throat would close up because if you were still young, in this setting of free rein, except you were still in love him like you used to be and he’s in love with you like he is now, neither you and Yoongi would be hurting.
Yoongi will take it. He’ll take the nothing that you give him and give you the everything that you don’t ask for anymore.
Five years versus the rest of your lifetime that you spent being in love with him is only miniscule. The suffering that he’s going through now is only a speck of the years you’ve spent in an unrequited love.
Unlike you, Yoongi’s weak. If he were to say it outloud to you, you’ll never agree because you’ve never regarded yourself otherwise. You’ll go on this tangent that you’ve always been weak, influenced by the times that Yoongi had chastised you for your lack of a passion. 
To you, Yoongi had been right in a way.
To Yoongi, he’s always been in the wrong.
He’s crying to you now that the both of you are alone, overlooking the small town he used to be keen on getting out of. Now, more than ever, Yoongi wants to stay in it. He wants to stay with you.
“Why is everything with you so hard?” Yoongi whispers, his tears stinging badly from the corner of his eyes to the point that he can only make out shapes. He’s unkempt and frantic as if his life flashed before his eyes and there’s nothing he could do about it, voice strained like much of the times he’s drank himself to sleep.
He resembles Haneul at the moment. He’s always had because there’s not one bit of Hyewon in his son’s features or personality, but he looks especially like him now that he’s crying. The back of his hands harshly dig into his face, sobs bursting right from his throat. “Why do I make everything so hard for us? Why can’t I— w-why can’t I make it right for once?”
There’s a tremble to your chest that you ignore earnestly, the presence of it enough to scare you because it’s familiar; too familiar. Seeing your past play out in front of you in the form of a seemingly content family sleeping on your bed is one thing, but it’s another to see its patriarch crumble in front of you. It’s different to see your past pleading in front of you for just the slightest bit of your attention.
As a matter of fact, it’s different now because you resemble Yoongi the most. 
“You never tried,” you seethe, jumping the gun before you even try to decipher what’s in the barrel. It’s a bullet you fire haphazardly that comes from your pocket that you’ve always held onto. It’s a misplaced, misshapen, old bullet that you force into a gun that Yoongi passed onto you.
Right now, Yoongi doesn’t resemble Haneul, and neither does he resemble his ex-wife. 
He resembles you with the way his eyes are clearly swimming in hurt while you avoid looking at his, just to relieve the painstaking feeling of guilt and longing compacted into a sob.
“I never tried?” Yoongi exhales shakily, his quivering hands running through his hair to tug on them.“I never tried?”
You hear yourself clearly even if it’s his voice. The tremble and the anger, even all the way to the blind hope.
“I kept trying to reach out to you every single time. Every single birthday, every single Christmas, every insignificant holiday I could search up!” Yoongi cries — he actually thrashes with the way he sobs, shoulders shaking violently. “I didn’t try? If I didn’t try, try looking at every page of my passport to see all the stamps there are whenever fucking Jungkook was reported to be in another country,” he spits his name like poison, the vitriol behind it, however, never catching up to what he feels about himself.
You resemble Yoongi the most because you stand untethered, eyes blurring and lips quivering, yet you only watch him lose himself before thinking of uttering a single word.
“I’m selfish, I’m an asshole, and I’m fucking insufferable. I can’t even apologize to you correctly,” Yoongi lists, chest rising up and down too heavily, he feels like it’ll give out. “But I love you, Y/N. I-I might be every bad thing in your life right now and I own up to that. I’m still trying to be the best for you.”
Not only does Yoongi resemble you — he’s actually become you.
“You can call me the vilest names ever but you can’t say that,” he grits, teeth chattering not from the cold he’s put himself in, but because he can’t stop mentioning your name in between. “You can’t say I never tried because I always have. I’ll never stop becausethat’s what it takes,” Yoongi mutters; because, he says, not if.
“I love you,” he says it far too clearly for someone who’s drunk; far too sincerely for someone who had spent the better part of his life putting it through your head that he can’t return your affection. “I’ve always loved you.”
( ♡ ) 
You don’t feel good.
There’s a fever that’s starting to bloom from the base of your skull all the way to your toes, the abnormal warmth you feel in your chest making you unable to interact with everyone else outside of your room. Jungkook had left with your uncles before dawn to go fishing in the nearby lake and never would you think to inconvenience him; to tend to someone like you for something as minor as a fever, or for anything at all.
You already have a system down for taking care of yourself when you’re ill. It started when neither your mom nor your brother were home with you, and it was finally perfected when you had to live completely alone in the big city. All you had to do was gather all the energy you have, spend it at the start to get everything you could possibly need and put them all at the side of your bed, and rest until everything no longer hurts.
The major flaw with your system now is that you don’t have the energy at all. You can’t build up the strength to get up, walk across the hall and interact with your relatives, and rummage through groceries to get what you need without being questioned; you can’t build up the sense of importance you have for yourself to ask for help.
Namjoon comes into your room before you could dance around the idea of asking him to get you water, all because he has this innate sense of guilt in him and you could utilize it to your advantage. Your brother gets ahead of you before you could even register that he’s here with you, his eyes sullen and pleading.
“Can we talk?”
“I can’t exactly storm off right now,” you rasp, your voice fading out into a low chuckle.
“Do you want to talk when you’re able to storm off?” he asks sincerely with a small smile, his hand fixing your hair as gently as he could without making your migraine ring further. “If you do though, then you probably might never hear me out again.”
You stay silent because he is right, but Namjoon feels otherwise. He feels as if he hasn’t been doing anything right at all and you existing separate from him is a constant reminder. His career is at its peak but he thinks he could go higher; his relationship with you is deteriorating and he doesn’t think it could possibly be worse.
“I’m sorry for being a shitty brother,” he apologizes, the first thing out of his mouth being the last thing that floods his mind before he goes to sleep at night. “I should’ve never defended Yoongi, even Hyewon by extension.”
The heat behind your eyes isn’t all from your fever. The tears that prick your eyes aren’t because of the pressure in your head, but because of the fact that you haven’t heard Namjoon apologize to you in a long time; you haven’t talked this sincerely for even longer
“I should’ve put you first,” he sniffles, muttering apologies in between his pauses for finding the right words that would make it okay; that would somehow undo all that he’s been an accomplice to. “I should’ve been this reliable, sturdy man of the house. I-I should’ve been more of a father figure to you-…”
“Don’t,” you interject sternly. “You never filled in his shoes and you should never will. You’re only mom’s son and my brother, Namjoon. It’s never been your job to raise me.”
Even after everything, there’s a gentleness to you that Namjoon’s always loved but hate the most now. He hates that even if he’s the one who’s apologizing, you’re the one who’s saying sorry for the things you didn’t even inflict on him. Neither of you wanted to be raised by only a single parent, yet you absolve him of the guilt he’s always felt.
“But I could’ve been better. I wish I was already better from the start.”
“I know.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t think how hard life was for you growing up. I-I would’ve given up football if only-…” he trembles, unable to get the last of his sentence out because you shake your head in earnest.
“Stop.”
“But I mean it. If only I-I didn’t get into football, I could’ve been there for you and mom much often. I could’ve been better and-...”
“But I grew up to be okay, didn’t I? You’re the best at what you do. We’ve managed to retire mom early because we put in the work,” you whisper, the shrug of your shoulders feeling more heavy that it should feel because the words don’t come out easily from you. 
“But okay shouldn’t have been enough for you,” Namjoon tears up, bottom lip trembling as you try to take in his words that you’ve always wanted to hear at the back of your mind; you hear them now when you’ve already grown up. You hear them now after you’ve already endured the grief. “I— we should’ve given you the fighting chance to grow up more than okay.”
.
.
.
It’s not Jungkook who comes to visit you while you’re nursing a fever, because you’ve temporarily banned him from the bedroom. He only pouted in complaint when you called him, but he didn’t fight you that much either because you’ve called him out for the excitement in his voice to go hiking for the first time.
It’s not Yoongi who comes to visit you while you’re nursing a fever, because Haneul asked him to teach him Go (he’s not even that good at it and being the ever unable to show incompetence and have pride especially when Jungkook’s watching father, he discreetly asked lessons from your mom) so he’ll be able to play with your cousins.
Instead, it’s your mom who visits you. Even if Namjoon hadn’t tipped her off that you were feeling under the weather, she’s already had a feeling this morning.
“Are you okay, sweetie?” she asks, her hands full of everything you could possibly need and more before plopping them at your side. She makes you sit up even before you could complain, handing you a drink with some medicine you didn’t even know she carried
“Just a little fever,” you answer, getting back into your cocoon. 
You don’t even attempt to make conversation because you fear that you don’t have it in you to have a heart-to-heart talk with your mom just minutes after you’ve had one with Namjoon.
You don’t even say anything to her except your thanks. Namjoon didn’t even tell her about your conversation, even if he approached her with tear-stained cheeks and bloodshot eyes while saying that it was just allergies.
Your mom feels the guilt spring to her chest even if you don’t utter a single word. She feels the remorse in her eyes when you don’t ask her for anything more. She feels the guilt the most in her hands when you don’t ask her to stay.
“I’m sorry if I made you feel like there wasn’t enough space for your burdens growing up.”
“What?”you scramble to get up in a seated position, eyes hazy from how quick you do it. “Mom, you scared me. Where’s this coming from?” 
She shakes her head at your cluelessness, eyes stinging when you genuinely look at her innocently. You don’t know what she’s talking about, even if the thought has plagued her for so long.
“You’re not really okay, are you?”
“It’s… just a fever,” you mumble, your breathing already trembling at the way she looks at you.
She’s looking at you like you’re still a kid; ever so fragile and innocent, it’s as if she wouldn’t let a single thing in this world harm you. She doesn’t know a single thing about your feud with Namjoon and your long drawn-out conflict with Yoongi. What your mom does know is that she doesn’t know a single thing about the heartbreak you suppress, and that thought alone makes her hiccup in tears.
“You’re right, you know? Our house is small,” she says, distinctly recalling the tensioned conversation you had with Namjoon back at home. “It’s tiny but it was far too big for you growing up alone,” she inhales sharply, trying not to sob in front of you. “He wasn’t in the picture. I was working a hundred jobs left and right. Namjoon was trying to make a name for himself,” she shakes her head, so much so that the necklace she’s had since you were children, the same one with yours and Namjoon’s birthstones on it, rattles. “I’m sorry for making you feel that you can’t come to me.”
In just a full day, you’ve heard everything that you’ve ever wanted. It’s everything you’ve ever wanted during the school plays where you had no one from your family, except Yoongi, to watch you become an extra up on stage. He’d always deny that he did show up for you and just say that it’s because he was genuinely interested in a play about a poet he didn’t care about in reality, but you take it nonetheless.
It’s everything you’ve ever prayed for watching Yoongi live a life far too advanced for you as he held Hyewon’s hand after school. It’s what you wanted to hear when you begged him not to leave you behind.
“I-I’m okay. I’m really-…” you stutter, looking away before your tears fall in the fear that they’ll never stop.
Your mom only hugs you tighter.
“I’m here if you want someone else to carry your burdens,” she whispers. “I’m here now.”
( ♡ )
It’s the last day of the reunion when you fully recover, and it’s hours ahead of everyone when Jungkook has to leave by himself.
Without even asking for it, Jungkook grants you another week’s worth of break. You didn’t even plan on asking, yet Jungkook’s willing to give you a month if only you do. 
You’ve already arranged for his personal driver to pick him up and take him back to the city. You’ve already packed his bags, along with the multiple containers of food that your relatives (and especially your mom) insisted for him to take. You’ve arranged for your substitute to take care of him for his schedules throughout the week, along with the insistent reminder to call you whenever Jungkook needs you. (Read: he does, with or without a schedule.)
Everything is set for Jungkook to leave except for his driver who’d been roped by your mom to be filled with breakfast first, yet with the remaining minutes left, Jungkook’s still with you on your bed. 
He lies on your lap even if there’s plenty of space for him to lie parallel to you on a pillow — and you let him.
“Have you ever thought about kissing me?” he asks in the middle of you texting your substitute, the randomness of his thought already being familiar to you. This time, unlike the few thousand times he’s ever asked you something straight off his mind without refining them, is different.
It’s different now because your pretend-boyfriend asks you if you’ve ever thought about kissing him, while looking like he really wants to kiss you.
“Where’d that come from?” you giggle, looking down on him on your lap. 
Not once does Jungkook ever look away from you.
“Dunno,” he shrugs, pointing up at you. “Your lips are close to bleeding and it’s bothering me.”
“Sorry for turning you off,” you snort in laughter, wiping at the tiny specks of blood. Jungkook tuts when you rub at them, feeling for his lip balm out of his pocket.
“I didn’t mean it like that,” he stresses, going a little cross-eyes when he applies them for you. His eyes keep goading you, the smile he has on his face widening the more that you look at him incredulously. “Sooo… have you?”
You don’t want to lie to him at all.
“If I answer yes, Jungkook,” you toy around with his hair, setting your phone face-down because you can’t focus on anything else now. “We can never come back from that.”
Jungkook laughs in glee so loudly, Yoongi (who was only passing by; he really, really swears he didn’t just happen to eavesdrop in your room because Jungkook’s driver is all done eating and wants to beat traffic) actually flinches.
Jungkook strains to be closer to you, unconsciously training you to lean down. His lips are far too soft — far too close to you, you could see every line and every nuance in them. He whispers, eyes practically crossing at your proximity.
“And is that such a bad thing?”
( ♡ ) 
You’re back at home when Jungkook texts you that he’s made it back safe, and that he wants to kiss you again.
You’re back at home when Yoongi asks you if he could use the bathroom first because Haneul spilled milk on him during the drive. You’re in your childhood bedroom when you let him clean up first, and you’re sitting on your childhood bed when you volunteer to put Haneul down because he’s cranky and for some reason, wants to be held by you.
You’re back at home too when Yoongi and Haneul are knocked out for the night, and your mom calls you and Namjoon down for all three of you to talk at the dining table.
You’re back at the home you were raised in, sitting on the dining table that’s creaky when more than two people lean their weight into it, in the space you’ve roamed around alone waiting for them to come home, when your mom talks about wanting to sell it.
“You want to sell?” Namjoon’s eyes widen, exchanging a glance with you who’s as equally surprised as he is.
“Yes. It’s under my name, y’know? Not that… man’s,” she snorts, the off-hand mention of your father making you and Namjoon laugh unexpectedly. Your mom looks at ease as she talks about selling your house, the smile she has one her face being shaped with experience and grace. “I doubt the both of you would want to keep this, and besides, the offers I’ve kept for years now are high. You already know that big-shot companies have been buying out houses here for years now because of the growth potential and whatnot. Who knows, maybe our block will be turned into a mall!” she shrugs, the happiness in her tone infectious. 
For someone who’s decided on letting go the house she’s both struggled and strived in, your mom’s beyond excited.
For two adults, who were once kids, who’ve seen the amount of sacrifices your mother’s put into the place by herself, you and Namjoon don’t have any objections.
“Also, consider this as me asking for permission to go on a vacation, even if I’m grown, because some people get so paranoid when I don’t answer calls,” she digs at you and your brother, immediately inciting coughs because you two, in fact, are guilty of worrying over your mom too much. “I’m going on this worldwide trip with Yoongi’s mom,” she grins, pulling out one last surprise. “We’ve talked about it since we were young. She’s earned her stripes working abroad, I managed to raise two amazing children as a single mom. We’ve earned it, I think.”
You and Namjoon share a glance once again, this time more definite than the last. You’ve made up already as far as your mom could tell, and that confirmation is what she needs before finally selling the house you all grew up in.
“You’ve earned it more than anyone.”
( ♡ ) 
Yoongi’s packing up for their flight tonight when you go into your room to pack up the life you’ve lived there.
“You’re coming with me and Haneul?” Yoongi jokes when he sees you pulling out your own luggage, the tone of his voice highly suggesting for you to become serious. He gets you to smile and that’s big enough of a win as is, the remainder of it more than substantial to hold onto when he’s away from you. Again.
“No, unfortunately. I’m packing up the room and eventually… the whole house,” you answer with a chuckle, voice trailing off when you see the crestfallen look on Yoongi’s face. He looks like someone who’s just absorbed the largest pain to man as he’s trying not to make it obvious. “We’re posting it for sale two weeks from now.”
Yoongi nods tightly, inhaling sharply as he tries to maintain his steady tone. “Then why are you packing up already?”
You could do this tomorrow. As a matter of fact, you could do it tonight because you don’t have to drive them to the airport. You have all the time in the world within two weeks to do this, yet you go into your room now when Yoongi’s still in it.
When Yoongi still hasn’t left, and neither of you know when you’re gonna see each other next.
“I have to get a move on. If I don’t move now,” you trail, voice close to trembling as you open cabinets you’ve never even given the time of day before. “I’m scared that I’ll keep holding onto this house.
Yoongi nods, even if he fully understands — even if he doesn’t want to swallow what you’re saying.
“You want out?”
“We want out — me, mom, Namjoon,” you explain, looking at him properly for the first time since he told you that he loved you. “For the longest time, we’ve held onto this place because we became this house at one point. Namjoon’s this world star, my mom’s traveling the world with your mom-…”
“Oh, they’re finally doing it?” Yoongi interrupts, a smile finally coming to his face at the news. He hasn’t talked to his mom in a month from how busy he’s been, and although he’s always missed her (even if they’re on much better terms than he and his dad could be), he’s happy knowing that your moms have each other atleast. “How about you? What will you be doing?”
“I’ll just be… living day-to-day. I’m not doing anything extremely special, but I’m happy and busy doing it,” you laugh, looking around your room that hasn’t appeared this clean, this warm, since you last stayed in it. “No one’s going to be around here anymore.”
As if on cue, Haneul runs to Yoongi’s arms to be picked up. He knows what the luggages mean and because he’s largely in denial that they have to leave later (as referenced by him crying to your mom and Namjoon), Haneul keeps pretending to sleep so that their trip gets delayed.
Yoongi’s about to put him on your bed even if he knows his son’s antics already, but in the fear that he’ll actually get to sleep and they don’t get to leave (which he isn’t opposed to at all), he keeps him in his arms.
You, on the other hand, take Haneul from him when his arms outstretch for you.
There’s the sentiment of you not having to do it that’s resting at the tip of Yoongi’s tongue but he holds himself back, the image of you and Haneul completely fitting one another, he wants to burn a copy of it to his retinas and designate it to be the last thing he’ll see if he ever goes blind.
Without putting Haneul to sleep on your bed, he goes to sleep in peace in your arms.
“Do you regret it?” Yoongi asks throughout the silence between you, sitting next to you at the edge of your bed. “Do you regret ever liking me?”
“I do,” you answer truthfully, rubbing circles at the Haneul’s back. “I regret knowing you.”
Yoongi takes the responsibility fully, even fuller than the way both your hurt and happiness could make or break him.
“I can’t take back all the hurt I’ve caused you,” he admits just as honestly, turning to look at you. He becomes surprised to learn that you’ve been looking at him the whole time. “But what I can promise you is that I’ll never do anything to hurt you again.”
“I have my share of faults too.”
“Eh. Mostly mine.”
“Mostly yours, yeah,” you laugh easily, nodding to yourself as you continue. “But I held onto you as much as you didn’t hold onto me. That’s my mistake.”
Yoongi stays silent at that, not because he agrees, but because the bias that you’ll never be wrong in his eyes overtakes your humbleness.
“Do you think he’ll remember the entirety of the trip?” you ask, gesturing to Haneul who’s already sleeping like a hibernating bear in your hold. “Or will Haneul just remember that time the power went out because he cried a lot?”
“Oh, he’ll remember everything alright. He’s good with retention and people in general,” Yoongi waves you off. “Even if he didn’t come along the trip— even if we didn’t crash the whole thing, Haneul would remember you.”
“Who am I to him?” you ask in curiosity, lips turning into a straight line before they curve in the slightest. “Appa’s friend, I bet.”
“Not really. You’re a lot of things to me,” Yoongi chuckles, looking at the way Haneul grips you as if you’ll float away if he lets go; he’d do the same too. “More like my first love.”
Yoongi loves you quietly.
He loves you quietly with the way he draws the curtains downstairs when you sleep on the couch, tired and stressed over a solution you couldn’t understand. He loves you with the way he’ll scoop the warmest, freshest, least-burnt portion of rice to your bowl without you even asking for it. He loves you with the way he’s willing to let you walk all over him.
He loves you quietly in the way that not even distance nor time could disrupt him.
Yoongi loves you quietly, it might have been too much.
“Is that a lottery ticket?” he asks suddenly as he spots the familiar face of it inside your luggage, tucked into the discreet pocket where your mother’s letters of encouragement when you went to the big city were also kept
“Oh, it’s still there,” you answer, in surprise yourself because even if this is the same luggage you use whenever you go out of the country with Jungkook, you’ve never noticed that it was still there. “I bought it when you left for the US.”
Yoongi stops in his tracks in retrieving the scratch ticket from the pocket, looking up at you in curiosity. “Why did you buy one that day?”
Haneul stirs in his sleep in your arms, waking up right at the middle of you and Yoongi being lost in each other. He mistakes the silence as a signal that they’ll be leaving already, making a mess of himself as he quickly goes down the stairs to look for your family there and cling to them instead.
You and Yoongi are alone again.
“I don’t know,” you answer honestly, grasping the scratch ticket you used to spend hours looking. “I guess I just needed some proof that fate was against me that day.”
“But how would you even know that?” Yoongi asks, pointing to the card that’s still covered. “You didn’t even scratch it.”
You answer honestly, the reason burnt to the back of his mind.
“Because I knew I would lose my mind if I actually lost.”
“Try,” Yoongi swallows, nudging the ticket closer to you with a gaze that mirrored yours when he left. “Try again. Please.”
You have nothing else to lose.
Yoongi isn’t yours to lose.
You retrieve the same old coin Yoongi gave to you on the same day that he bought you your first scratch ticket, the appearance of it from your luggage making his heart skip a beat.
He doesn’t speak and neither do you, gaze only fixed on the way you scratch the card almost hesitantly, as if you’re still scared of the results of something that you should’ve known five years ago. (Read: you still are.)
When you get to the last digit, you freeze. You comb through the pattern over and over again, yet you still can’t believe it.
You’ve won the highest possible prize.
“Oh.”
“Oh,” you parrot Yoongi, looking up at him as he can’t believe it either.
“You won.”
“I won,” you repeat, running a hand through your hair. You actually laugh, the lump in your throat subsiding. It’s a welcome, albeit loaded, feeling of happiness that comes in between the two of you. “I thought I would lose,” you mutter bitterly, shaking your head. 
You didn’t lose. Fate wasn’t against you that day, and yet you still lost yourself thinking subconsciously what the proof of it would’ve been.
“Who would’ve thought, right?” you sigh, eyes drifting to Yoongi. “If only I took that chance years ago, I would’ve won.”
Yoongi smiles tightly, breath faltering in recollection.
“I’m familiar with the feeling,”
Yoongi doesn’t get to finish packing for him and Haneul and neither do you with your whole room, the shift in the atmosphere suddenly making him stand.
He’s breathless and he doesn’t know what for, the rapid beating of his chest making his voice louder than necessary. “Hey, what do you say you take a break? I’ll pack up your room. I have to stay alert anyway for Haneul."
You thank him before leaving him alone in your room.
Yoongi can’t find the strength in him to pack. The only power he has left in him is for him to think of taking everything out from his luggages, the thought of leaving again, this time worlds different than the last when you were begging him not to — he feels like throwing up.
Yoongi’s merely an amalgamation of you. He’s only a compilation of your every word, every feeling you’ve implanted in his heart. He’s filled with nothing but your every triumph and shortcoming; every late night hanging out with you as you attempt to study while he keeps you company, every minute he spent going out of his mind trying to look for you when you ran away from home.
Yoongi loves you silently to the point that he gets out of your room without accomplishing a single thing he said he’ll do just awhile ago.
In the grand scheme of things, Yoongi realizes that he was wrong. He was as wrong as you were right that the moment he leaves home, he’ll spend the rest of his life looking for it. 
Even if you left your home like he did, even if neither of you could come home anymore the moment your childhood house gets sold, Yoongi would still search for it. He’ll still search for you. You’re no longer where you were, but you are everywhere that Yoongi is.
He looks for you in Namjoon’s room, to the dining table, and all the way outside, just to ask if he and Haneul could stay for dinner.
Yoongi finds you and Haneul eating sundaes on the pavement outside, with you on the ground and a scrap cardboard underneath Haneul so it wouldn’t be hot for him.
Fate hadn’t been against you five years ago. And even if he’s much too late, Yoongi could only pray that fate isn’t against him now.
He walks over to where you and Haneul are, grabbing another scrap of cardboard to put underneath you.
Yoongi is consumingly yours all the time.
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totheblood · 7 months
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I WISH I NEVER MET YOU.
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pairing: ex!ellie williams x reader
warnings: SUGGESTIVE mdni 18+... not sm*t but close... cursing, drinking, bitchy ellie
a/n: i love this song and was like wait... i need to write a fic based off of this song so i did that and i just love mean and spiteful ellie like... i apologize.. ai audios in the fic <3 reblogs, asks, and replies are so appreciated and encouraged! thank u kisses
wc: 2.3k
"tryna forget the seven minutes we had in heaven."
The world was spinning.
Or that was what it felt like. The tequila you had downed earlier was now starting to mix with the joint you shared with Dina earlier on her front step. She had held the nearly finished stub in between her fingers and had her other hand tracing circles on the fleshy part of your thigh. It was all innocent as you laughed about the new job she had started and her weird coworker who had asked her out a few times. It was all innocent until she mentioned Ellie and how she said she was going to stop by later that night. 
It wasn’t a party, but it wasn’t not a party. A few of your friends had gathered at Dina and Cora’s new place, a housewarming party done their way. Inside a few friends had gathered around a table playing some card game and taking shots, but you needed some fresh air and Dina had followed you. From out here you could hear the faint music coming from inside, and the streetlights made Dina’s skin look golden, but it was still early and you were already fairly drunk. 
“She said she’s coming?” you confirmed, needing to double-check that Ellie agreed to be in the same room as you. 
“Yeah,” Dina coughed, taking a deep hit of the joint, the end glowing yellow and orange, “Said she feels bad about not coming around anymore.”
“Right,” you scoffed, grabbing the joint from her and taking a deep hit, closing your eyes as you blew out the smoke. 
“Can you not do that tonight?” Dina set her face up in a pout, eyes dramatically wide, “She’s finally getting over whatever this was and I just want us to be normal again.”
“I’m not doing anything,” you rolled your eyes, sitting up straighter, “I tried to talk to her but she didn’t want to. Not my fault.”
“But isn’t it?” Dina started. She knew she was crossing a boundary she shouldn’t, but she was also tipsy and exhausted from the standoff you and Ellie had.
She wasn’t wrong, it was technically your fault. Months ago you were at a party gathering just like this, twice as drunk as you were right now. Some idiot, probably Cora, had suggested playing 7 minutes in heaven, just like you all had done in high school. No one in the room was sober, therefore everyone agreed. 
A circle was formed in the living room, everyone sitting with their legs criss-crossed on the floor, giggling and blushing like 10th graders. One couple had decided to sit it out and watch the game from the couch. Two seats to your left sat Ellie, hair pulled back into a loose bun and her face already a bright red. She never was your closest friend, but she was still someone you talked to often. You’d occasionally Facetime, send each other TikToks, and sit next to each other if the group went out for dinner. But you were not her best friend, and she definitely wasn’t yours.
You would be lying if you said you didn’t think about her often. She had this girlish charm that usually translated as awkwardness and she would always make jokes under her breath, just loud enough for only you to hear them. You didn’t notice how red she got whenever she made you laugh like she had just won the world’s biggest prize. But besides that, she was cute. Really cute, and perpetually single. The group would often make jokes asking why she never dated anyone, and she would just make some comment about how she was waiting for the ‘right one’. Her eyes would always flicker over to you when she said that.
But this night, when she spun the bottle and it landed on you she nearly choked. You looked up at her with your doe eyes, those fucking eyes, she thought, and she nearly lost it. Everyone was laughing, clapping, and hollering at the idea of the two of you being locked in a dim closet for 7 minutes. 
“We don’t have to…” She started, preparing herself for rejection, “if you’re not comfortable.”
“Why wouldn’t I be comfortable?”
Click. 
The door locked the two of you inside the tiny room. This close to you she could smell you. She could smell the liquor coming off of you in waves mixing with vanilla perfume. There was just enough light for her to make out your features, the tip of your nose, and the crease in between your eyebrows. From this close, she could see everything.
“So…” her voice faltered, nervousness seeping into her tone, “what do we do?”
“I think you’re supposed to kiss me,” you whispered back, your voice immediately sending a flood to her pants.
“Do you want me to?” She whispered back, eyes searching your face and landing on your lips. You pulled your bottom lip in between your teeth, before nodding. Fuck. She took a shaky breath, her calloused fingers grazing the open skin of your waist. Her fingers were cold but your body ran hot, you were unsure if it was the alcohol or her having this effect on you. Her fingertips curled inwards, pulling you closer to her.
You were now chest to chest, both of you heavy breathing despite not having kissed yet. You were so close that she could feel your heartbeat and your tits. She gripped you a little bit harder causing you to groan. It was all so painfully slow, each movement dragged out. She dipped her head down, her lips now just hovering over yours making your eyelids flutter closed. You could feel her smile before she kissed you, as slow and languid as her movements were before.
Her lips were soft, tongue peeking through and grazing your teeth, urging them open. She was kissing your like her life depended on it. Your hands gripped at her neck, trying to pull her closer but she stumbled forward pushing you into the shelf. 
“Fuck,” she breathed in between a wet kiss, “you okay?” 
“Mhm,” You hummed. Her hand moved down now, ghosting your ass before giving it a light squeeze and lifting your thigh up so she could get even closer. If it kept going like this she was going to be inside of you within minutes. She pushed closer, her clothed cunt griding up against yours, causing you to gasp.
“Feel good?” She teased, now moving to kiss up your jaw when- 
Click.
The two of you separated, hands smoothing out your clothes as the door opened. It was obvious what had happened, a little bruise had formed on your jaw where she had kissed, and she was now wearing lipstick she didn’t come to the party wearing. 
That night you went home with her. 
You shuddered thinking of that night, not knowing it was the beginning of the end. Whatever relationship you had with her was now ruined, and it was your fault. You spent nights crying over how much of your fault it was, but that wouldn’t change anything. You ended things, and Ellie wanted nothing to do with you now. 
“I guess,” you shrugged, “but people break up every day Dina. People move on.”
It was Dina’s turn to scoff as she snatched the tiny joint back from you, “You don’t move on that easily when you’re in love with someone.”
“She was not in love with me,” you rolled your eyes again, your high making you feel anger more than anything now.
“Oh, so you’re just fucking stupid,” Dina deadpanned, taking another hit, giggling as you shoved her playfully.
“Oh, fuck you,” you laughed, trying to keep your real emotions at bay. 
“Can’t,” she laughed, blowing smoke out her nose, “Ellie would probably murder me.”
The conversation wasn’t productive, but you didn’t want to be on the front step when Ellie arrived. You feared that if she saw you, she probably wouldn’t even come to the door, let alone inside. You honestly missed her, and you were beginning to forget what she even sounded like. 
Thirty minutes had passed and you started nursing your third drink, playing beer pong in the backyard when you noticed a familiar sound. Her laugh, over everything, was the only thing you heard. 
“Oh, um I have to use the bathroom,” you excused yourself running up the stairs and straight into the kitchen where Ellie was now alone, getting a drink from the fridge. She obviously didn’t see you come in, or thought you were Dina because she was speaking. 
“You only bought Truly’s,” she scoffed from the fridge, “fucking lame.” 
“Still better than a Four Loko,” you joked. You watched her pause, her whole body stiffening before standing up straight and closing the door. She stared at the refrigerator so she didn’t have to look at you. You watched her chest rise and fall as she took deep breaths. 
“What do you want?” Her tone was much colder now, her voice icy and mean. 
“Just wanted to say hi,” your voice was small, you hated yourself for it.
“Well, don’t,” she shook her head, turning to the counter now, the hard liquor lined up in front of her. She picked up vodka, bad choice.
“Can we just-” you stepped next to her, voice in a whisper loud enough she could hear. She tensed up as you stood close to her and you hated the position you were in. 
“No, we can’t,” She shook her head, pulling a red solo cup from its place on the counter and pouring the vodka in the cup, “I told you I didn’t want to talk to you.”
“But-”
“No fucking ‘buts’. You don’t get everything you want, okay?” She looked at you now, her green eyes now accompanied by dark circles. Her freckles were more prominent with summer finally coming to an end. She looked tired, but still beautiful, “You’re so fucking selfish.”
“I’m selfish because I couldn’t date you?” You laughed bitterly, that third drink hitting you like a bag of bricks, “That’s real rich considering you’re the one who’s been an asshole to me because you can’t fuck me anymore.”
She looked pissed. Her hands gripped the sides of the counter as she looked down at it, trying to stop herself from doing what she wanted to. Instead, she downed the vodka, not even flinching.
“No one wants to fuck you,” she looked at you, eyes glossed over, “and you’re the one who dumped me over text like a fucking coward.”
You scoffed, crossing your arms over your chest. 
“I’m an asshole to you because I want to make it perfectly clear I want nothing to do with you. I don’t want to fuck you, I don’t want to see you, and I definitely don’t want to hear any sob story about how you ‘couldn’t’ do it. You’re a pathetic loser who broke up with me over text on our 6 month anniversary.”
“Ellie,” a voice from behind you caused you both to turn around. You wiped at the tears rolling down your face, “What the fuck?”
It was Dina, standing with her arms crossed as she watched you two in disappointment. You ran off pushing past her and into the bathroom, crying pathetically on the toilet and blowing your nose in the toilet paper. Back in the kitchen Dina had approached Ellie, an eyebrow raised as if she was waiting for an answer. 
“She just,” Ellie poured another cup, “she gets under my fucking skin, okay?”
“But talking to her like that?” She shook her head in shame, “What’s gotten into you?”
“She has!” Ellie replied, “That shit fucking hurt, okay? And I let her get away with it at first because I loved her but all she thinks is that I’m mad because I can’t fuck her. I’m over it.”
“She’s just saying that,” Dina’s voice was now more tender as she talked to Ellie, “she misses you and doesn’t know how to deal with it.”
“She doesn’t fucking miss me,” Ellie downed the second cup.
“You just tell yourself that because you wouldn’t know how to feel if it was true.”
“If she missed me she wouldn’t have done that,” Ellie sighed.
“Not everything is black and white,” Dina sighed looking to the side. “Just try to get over it before the trip. It’s a really big deal to Cora and I don’t want it to be a mess because you both are so miserable.”
“I don’t think I can come, D,” Ellie shook her head, fingers tapping on the counter, “Not like this, not with her.”
“Ellie, please don’t do this,” Dina held her shoulders, her eyes wide and sad. Ellie had a soft spot for Dina, which was the only reason she came to the housewarming party, but she was unsure of how much she would take before she snapped. 
“Fine,” she sighed, “but I’ll be driving by myself. I’m not sitting in a two-hour-long car ride with her.”
“Thank you, thank you, thank you!” Dina squeezed Ellie tight, making her groan and attempt to push her off. 
---
The trip came sooner than expected, the party being nearly a month ago. You drove down with Dina and Cora, singing Lana songs the whole drive. The Hamptons were quiet around this time and Cora (and her rich family) owned a vacation house out there on the water. You spent nearly every summer here, you, Dina, Cora, Ellie, Jesse, Faye, and Cora’s twin brother, Orion all crammed into their giant house. Except this time was different. This was the trip that Dina and Cora were going to announce their engagement. 
No one knew yet, and Dina had wanted your little group of friends to be the first to know. A special intimate moment between the group and the place it had started. However, when you pulled up to the house, driving up the long driveway, you saw Ellie’s jeep parked out front with her and some girl leaning against the side of the car. 
You all hopped out, but you stood to the side as you watched Dina and Cora hug Ellie and this new girl. 
“Hey guys, I hope you don’t mind,” Ellie spoke, eyes drifting to yours for a moment before she smirked, “this is my girlfriend, June.”
Fuck.
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ohcaptains · 1 year
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don’t you dare fall in love | 3
pairing. dealer college student! ellie williams x f! reader
PART ONE. PART TWO. MASTERLIST. synopsis. ellie tries her hardest not to mix business with pleasure. or, ellie gets a new customer and unfortunately falls in love with her.
warnings. 18+. blank & ageless blogs will be blocked. clichè comments on sorority girls (sorry), sexually explicit descriptions of female receiving cunnilingus, fondling, fingering, and dry humping. not beta’d.
an. well here ya go! thank u to all those who were so patient and lovely with me<3 to those who weren’t and were mean to me...i’m giving you the nastiest dirty look rn. pls comment and reblog!!!! love u. 
When Ellie gets out of her meeting with her personal tutor, she’s just about ready to throw herself down the stairs.
Catapult herself out of the window and perish on the campus floor. That way, she wouldn’t have to rewrite this God. Damn. Essay.
It sucks that she has to do actual work to get her degree, but what sucks even more, is doing the work and being told you’ve done it all wrong.
At first, Ellie was angry. Now, she’s frustrated. Tired. Was up all night writing this essay because she’s been waiting for this meeting for a whole week, and all the man did was say, you’re not actually answering the question.
“Fucking asshole,” she murmurs, pushing through the doors.
She reaches the quiet hallway of the humanities block, the dilapidated building stuffy with age. She misses her uber-funded science building. Misses the cool white and sleek edges. Here, there’s paper covering everything.
The hallways go round and round – lift creaks from the weight of students carrying War and Peace in their backpacks, year after year.
She’s near tears when she hears you calling her name.
“Els?” you ask, tone confused and edged with excitement. Ellie’s heart does its little familiar leap. She turns to you, sniffing the tears away. It’s been a minute since she saw you in the flesh. Her body aches, eager to touch you. “Hey,” she greets, the presence of you brightening her mood for a sweet second. You’re wearing a casual pair of black jeans and a band tee – Ellie owns a similar one, and for a moment, she thinks you’re wearing her shirt. “I was just about to text you –” you start, but your face twists, noticing hers. “You okay?” “Yeah,” Ellie lies. The tears push harder now, your concern making her belly flop.
You frown. “No, you’re not.”
Her lip wobbles.
“Ellie?” “Sorry, just – fuck --” her eyes are rimmed red, tears pushing over the edge. “—had a really shitty meeting with my tutor about my essay that’s worth like, 50% of my grade and I’m so busy with other work and—” a tear slips down her cheek, but you’re quick to take her in your arms, murmuring, “oh, Els,” as you cup her head and pull it into your neck.
She releases a breath, leaning her full weight into your body.
You smell like laundry detergent and coffee. Smell familiar. She’s comfortable here. It’s why she lets herself begin to cry against your shoulder.
“Awh, sweetheart,” you whisper, hands running up and down her back, soothing her like a baby.
“What did the feedback say?” “Have to change the whole thing. And I have enough time, but I have other work.” “Yeah, I can imagine.” “He basically said that if I submit this essay, I’ll fail.” “Well, you won’t, because I’ll hack into the system and change your grade for you.”
Ellie hiccups a laugh, “you know nothing about computers.” “I’ll learn for you. Take some night classes. What’s the essay for?” you ask, still rubbing her back. “English.” “I can help you if you want.” “Yeah?” “Yeah, come to mine. I’ll look through the question with you, and help you plan.”
Ellie pulls away, wiping her wet, red-rimmed eyes with the sleeve of her hoodie. You help her, drying the dampness from her chin and cheeks, and smoothing her hair behind her ears.
She beams from your touch. Her body goes hot from your care -- belly flips over.
You hold her shoulders, keeping her steady, and Ellie thanks the Gods you texted her that day. Your smile is resolute as you say, “It’ll be okay. We got this.”
When you open the door to your accommodation, Ellie is mid panic attack. “You live in a sorority?” she squeaks. When you sent her the address earlier, she hadn’t really read it, too busy trying to calm her beating heart. Going to her house going to her house.
Now, she’s standing in front of you, and thinking – this is your house? There’s a teardrop chandelier hanging behind you, and the staircase loops around the entrance hall, feeding into the back of the house.
You frown, confused. “Yeah, did I not tell you?” “No – “Ellie bursts, clearly flustered, “-- you failed to provide me with that information.” She makes a mental note to text Dina, simply – what the fuck, man? “Is it a problem?” you wonder, leaning against the doorframe, comfortable in your home. (Wearing pyjama shorts and a baggy top, you know, comfortable)
You didn’t seem like a sorority girl. But what did that even mean?
You did have a lot of…spirit.
Ellie imagines you hosting mixers and philanthropy events.
(Imagines you wearing a lot of pink and jumpers with your sorority name on it and nothing else.) “I don’t really sell to frats or sororities,” she explains, because, yeah, that’s the reason she’s having a hot moment. She thought she knew a lot about you. This, right here, is a big deal, and yet she’s only now just finding out.
What else did she not know about you? You think for a quick second. “Oh. Well,” you smile, patting your chest, concluding, “I’m the exception,” and you take her hand and pull her in, closing the door behind her.
When Ellie’s in the house, she doesn’t let go of your hand.
Instead, she uses it to tug you closer, and your wrist pushes into her belly. “They let queer girls into sororities?” she whispers, close enough to taste the mint gum you’re chewing.
Ellie has ideas of girls on the straight and narrow. No girl kissing here, unless guys are watching. Ellie cringes at the cliché, but you’re not offended – hadn’t heard her thoughts, so, that would be why – as your lips pull into a sly smile.
You lean forward, a ghost of a kiss. Ellie’s throat squeezes. “They don’t know that I’m a queer girl,” you whisper back, the heat of your eyes all-consuming.
Ellie watches you shrug.
“They don’t know that at least a quarter of them are queer girls, but – they’re not ready for that conversation.” “But you’re out, no?” Ellie quickly stumbles. If you’re not out, then that really messes with her plans to marry you and meet all your family. “Yeah,” you shrug again, explaining, “they just haven’t asked,” as if it’s the simplest thing in the world. In some ways, Ellie guesses, it is. She beams, “Well, they’ll ask when they see you hanging with me.” “What, why?” “Because I’m a known queer girl” “Oh, you have a reputation?” you quirk, and Ellie hums, “It’s possible I may have fooled around with some of your sorority sisters.” You chew on your lip, and cock your head to the side, “But did you share a really weird and intimate high with them where you cuddled all night, woke up mid-orgasm and then it made things super weird and odd to the point where you never really spoke about it again?”
Ellie grins, “No.” You shrug, “Oh, well. I win then,” and take her hand and begin to drag her behind you like a lost puppy dog.
She’s behind you on the stairs again, and you catch her staring when you turn to say, “Let’s go to my room.” As you drag her through the house, Ellie doesn’t see anyone, but she does hear the ominous sound of girl giggles and whispering. Heat blooms in her cheeks, as if she’s got omniscient eyes at the back of her head.
Ellie didn’t get along with peppy girls – too full of inner turmoil to match their happy-go-lucky attitude. The thought makes her clutch your hand tighter, and she speeds up, bumping her shoulders with yours.
“So, what’re the rules?” “Huh?” you ask, looking at her funny. The pair of you pass a group photo, and Ellie wants to stop and gawk – try and find your smiling face – but you tug her along, sensing her motives. “Like,” Ellie starts, stuck on her phrasing. “How should I be around you?” You frown up at her, deciphering her meaning. Slowly, your frown loosens. A small smile pushes into the side of your cheek. You squeeze her hand.
“Just be my Ellie.”
The pair of you go through Ellie’s question, and you help her write up a plan, noting all of her points and the quotes she should use.
Ellie tries to focus, but the whole time she’s thinking about how close you are to her – leaning against her, pushing your shoulder into hers.
She’s sitting on your bed in your room, and she’s hot all over as a result – smelling the scent from your burning candle and listening to the soft music you’re playing out of the laptop speaker.
Your walls are covered in posters. Pictures of you with family and friends and Ellie is surrounded by so much you that it feels like it’s always been like this.
Always been in your room, with her head on your lap, listening to your playlist – Ellie’s got Shazam out, but you’re just sending her the link. On her main phone, now – no busted one at the bottom of her bag.
She’s so busy being with you that she’s not wondering what she’s doing with you.
What are we? She wants to ask, but then your roommate decides to come in.
She pauses in the doorway, flinching as if she’s walked in on something intimate.
Ellie watches your eyes widen an inch, but then you catch yourself, smiling and waving. “Hey,” you greet, and your roommate – actually wearing a hoodie with your university name on it -- smiles, “Sorry, just grabbing my charger.”
“No problem,” you respond, and when she finally flicks her gaze to Ellie – kept on looking around her, like she was panhandling for money on the subway – her smile loosens.
She’s silent as she grabs her wire from her bed and doesn’t look at the pair of you as she leaves. When she’s out of the door, you get up and lock it. Coming back, Ellie gets comfy on your lap again.
“Did she look at me funny?” She’s not sure what your relationship with her is like, so she steps carefully. “I think she fancies me,” you casually explain, and Ellie’s belly flops.  “For real?” You nod, wiggling your brows. “Should I be jealous?” she jokes, and your lips curl, tongue peeking out as you run it across the backs of your teeth. “We were together, once.” Ellie tries to imagine the pair of you together, and she comes up blank. Though, that’s probably because she’s too busy editing the image to clip her face in. “Yeah?” “Mm, at a Halloween party.” You’re grinning too wide. “You’re just fucking with me,” Ellie huffs, rolling her eyes. “I’m not! I was dressed as a cat, and she was this like, sexy nun or something.” “Really?” Ellie asks, raising a brow and pulling a face that says, you’re full of shit. “Fine – I won’t tell you then.” “No no, I wanna hear this.” “What’s with the tone? I thought you’d for sure want to hear about my sexual escapades.” “What’s that supposed to mean?” You pull your lips together and raise a brow. Ellie suddenly feels too hot. Suddenly wants to run very quickly out of your bedroom door. Butterflies swirl in her belly, blood rushes to her cheeks, to her neck, and she feels the tips of her toes go numb.
You’ve danced around each other with this flirty banter for a while now, but it means something more now that you’ve said it out in the open.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Ellie lies, hoping the red of her cheeks isn’t too prominent in the warm glow of your bedroom. You don’t lose your pursed lips, and Ellie rolls her eyes.
“Just hurry up and tell me about how you fucked your roommate.” “Say please,” you quickly rebut, and Ellie chokes.
The fuck? “What?” She laughs nervously, ignoring the quick electric bolt that shot through her groin, “fuck off.” “Fine,” you bleat, leaning back against the bedframe. “I won’t tell you then,” and Ellie shakes her head, proclaiming, “You’re insane,” and you grin at her, raising a testy brow, “It’s just manners, Ellie.”
When Ellie had imagined the dynamics of your relationship – but not relationship – it was you saying please. Preferably whispering it with your fingers in her auburn hair. Please Ellie, please do that again.
Ellie sits up from your lap, shaking the image away.
She takes in the curve of your brow, and the teasing slip of your lips. She dips closer – sudden, quick – and relishes in the way your mouth falls open an inch.
“I’m not begging you,” she whispers, not bothering to hide how mesmerised she is by your mouth.
“No?” you speak, matching her lazy tone. You nod to her, “I thought you’d be into that.”
Jesus fucking Christ, what’s happening right now? Ellie thought you’d help plan her essay and be done with it – she’d hoped for some flirty banter, but this was different. This was… Ellie leans closer, propped up by her hand that she’s planted beside your thigh. “If I say please, I want intricate detail.” “If you say please, I’ll give you whatever you want.” This girl…
“Whatever I want?” Ellie quirks. “Yeah,” you respond, and you press your forehead against hers, tone breathy as you repeat, “Whatever you want.”
Ellie can think of a lot of things she wants. For starters, she wants to close this gap and finally kiss you, but she says, “Please tell me your story,” and you smile, all teeth.
“It was Halloween.” “You said that.” “n, we were really drunk, and she’s like – straight straight, right?” You say straight like someone would say sorry. “Mm,” Ellie hums, her belly swirling. She hasn’t moved a fucking inch. Her palm is cramping, but hell if she’s going to lean away from you right now. This is a whole other kind of foreplay. “We’re in the bathroom.” “Here?” she asks, needing details – information. What day was it? Time?
You nod, and your nose brushes against hers. Her face blooms red again, and the brush of your touch makes her brain fuzzy. “We’re making out, and I thought she only wanted to kiss, but then she starts tryna take my top off.”
There’s a sincere edge to your tone. Your eyes are wistful, but you’re beaming – spurred by the excitement evident in Ellie’s eyes.
“Things get heated. She’s touching me everywhere, you know, hands just, between my legs, on my chest. Says she’s wanted me for ages but couldn’t say it, I mean, she’s got a boyfriend.” “A boyfriend?” Ellie asks, and fuck, that makes it worse. Or better? Either way, her body begins to ache like it did that morning – when it was just the pair of you and the world was quiet. Thrums electric and Ellie’s suddenly worried about the electric bill. “Yeah – frat boyfriend. Frat president boyfriend.” “Look at you, miss home wrecker.” You roll your eyes, “you want me to finish the story?” “I said please, didn’t I?” “You’re the worst.” “So…she’s taking your top off.” “Yeah. Then she’s taking my pants off, too. Then says, she’s never been with a girl before, can I show her?” Ellie pulls back with a groan. She can’t help it. Pulls back and falls into your lap, imagining you showing her how to fuck.
Her eyes are glazed over, like she’s somewhere else, thinking, about something else. She rubs her face and listens to your sweet giggle.
“Sorry,” she says, settling back, and you hold your hands up.
“No worries, take your time.”
Ellie waits – patiently. Waiting for you to divulge more information. Please carry on, she thinks. Please please please.
She feels like a kid at camp listening to the teens tell a ghost story around the campfire. And then what?
“You made her come?” she whispers, failing to hide the excitement in her whisper. A small, thoughtful smile finds your lips, and you lean down, hair brushing over her face.
Your thigh pushes into the back of her head, and you smell like a forest.
Your room smells like a fucking forest. Pine and vanilla.
The lights are dim, cloaking the room in a warm glow. She swears she hears trees swaying in the distance, but she realises – faintly – that it’s just the blood rushing in her ears. No trees here, she thinks. No bloody forest.
You’re looking down at her, eyes glittering in the warm light. After a stress-filled silence, you nod, whispering, “against the wall, cat ears still on. Made her come so hard it was dripping down my chin.” “Jesus,” Ellie whispers. Her legs fidget, trying to squirm from the warmth pushing between her thighs. She pushes her hair away from her forehead, even those it’s already tucked behind her ears. “Then what?” she asks, moving in your lap. Then what then what.
Your lips curl into a small smile, “Then we never spoke about it again.”
Ellie feels her eyes go dark with the memory. Imagines a film over them — lost in her own brain. Pictures you crawling on your hands and knees, on the prowl with your cat ears sitting pretty.
What was it you said again? That she was dripping all over your chin?
Her tongue peaks through her lips, pretty in pink, and she notices your small smile curve wider. Though, it’s not kind. It’s edged with something, as if you’ve made a funny and she doesn’t get the joke.
Ellie’s belly drops.
A laugh bursts out of your mouth, and she freezes. Nononononono, you didn’t. “I’m sorry—” you start, hiding your smile, and Ellie’s lips open in shock, then she’s snapping to -- jumping up from your lap, red all over.
She’s looking for her coat, hands shaking “nah, that’s not funny,” she’s saying, all while the faux image of you between a girl’s thighs buzzes behind her eyes.
It was her. She was the girl. She’d even imagined taking your cat ears off and putting them on her head. “Yeah, it was – Ellie,” you laugh, reaching for her hand, and Ellie’s body reacts to the touch.
You spin her into you, pouting, “Come onnnnn, I was playing.” “You’re mean for making that up. You’re a horrible person.” “Awhhh, I’m sworry. I’m sworry, come here –” You pull her into you, wrapping your arms around her neck. Be mad. Ellie thinks. Be mad be mad be mad—oh, but you’re so soft and warm.
She falls into you, hands catching your hips — holding you steady, as her head pushes into the curved gap between your throat and shoulder. You hold the back of her neck, hugging her close.
“I’m sorry, that was mean.” “Made me all worked up,” Ellie admits. The all-familiar ache is back. Then again, it’s never far when you’re around. “Yeah?” you quirk, the tone saying: tell me all about it. “Mm.” “Thinking about me with another girl?” She breathes a laugh, then breathes in your scent, the smell causing her to hold your hips tighter.
“You gotta write my essay now, make it up to me.” Your laugh rattles against her body.
“What you on about? I gave you free material to think about.” “What?” she laughs, squinting her face together. She pulls away, and you look up at her, chewing on your bottom lip.
You glance down at her mouth, and a breath gets caught in her throat. “Nothing,” You grin, and she cocks her head to the side, tightening her grip on your waist. “No, tell me. You made fun of me, you gotta tell me.” “I don’t have to do anything, Ellie.” “I’ll get it outta you.” “Yeah, how?” “You won’t know until it happens.”
“Weirdo,” you scoff, pulling away. “Let me walk you home, they wanna do a group meeting about some charity event later.” “Ooo, little miss sorority girl.”
You smack her chest, “Hey!” but Ellie grabs your hand, laughing as she pulls you into her, catching your hips again. You gasp in surprise, hands catching hers, and your chest pushes into hers.
She feels you focus on the cavern of her eyebrow scar, then the dust of freckles over her nose. The wild brush of her eyebrows, and the small, circular, chickenpox scar on her cheek.
Ellie gets confident or forgets the proximity of your relationship — nothing new — and rests her forehead against yours.
The world gets quiet.
The buzz of your music fades out, and all Ellie can hear is the small, clipped, and shaky sound of your breathing.
Your eyes flutter closed for a brief second, and Ellie wants to kiss you. Always wants to kiss you, but this is different. This is new and sudden and sweet. It’s soft. Gentle.
Your fingers graze over hers, and she imagines holding you like this forever.
Imagines doing this, as often as she likes.
All you’ve done together, and you haven’t even kissed yet. Ellie gazes at your wet mouth.
“Wanna come to mine? We don’t even have to smoke; you can just help me with the intro to my essay.” Your lips twist, and a small smile appears. “Ellie,” you whisper, tinged with a double meaning. “What?” she asks, feigning innocence. “I can’t,” you whisper.
She breathes in deep, eyes closing as she presses her forehead against yours. “Not even for a second?” “Ellie.” “Please?” she whispers, looking at you, and your face falls. Your mouth opens an inch, the red of your tongue alluring. When you don’t respond, Ellie slowly dips lower and tentatively brushes her mouth against yours. Your breath catches.
The skin of your lips is pillow soft, and for the first time, she’s able to taste your lip gloss from the source.   “Doesn’t please get me anything I want?” Ellie hushes. The music has bled into the background, a hum in the walls of your room. It rattles through her toes and dances through her chest, forcing her heart to thrum with life. Your eyes are half-lidded, lashes brushing over your cheeks when you look at her mouth. “That was a one-time deal,” you manage to tease, despite the nerves radiating off of you. “So, I can’t kiss you?” “I never said that.”
Your tone is dangerous. Ellie’s lips quirk into a smirk. “I didn’t say please though?”
There’s a heated 30 seconds where you pluck up some courage. Ellie can hear the cogs turning in your pretty little head before you conclude that, “manners are overrated,” and press your cherry lips against hers, sticky and artificially sweet.  
The world stops in that movie magic kind of way.
Reality flutters to a pause, the music switches off, the natter from your roommates downstairs goes quiet, and Ellie can no longer hear the constant anxious beating of her heart.
It’s just you and your mouth – the press of your lips, no tricks, just the delicate touch of yours against hers.
Ellie is 15 again and playing truth or dare at that camp her uncle forced her to go to.
She’s picking dare and kissing Jessica Carter, the daughter of a man that owned a slew of Ice Cream shops in Salt Lake, and it means so much more to Ellie than it does to Jessica.
She feels the electricity of the kiss pulse throughout her body, like she’s got her soapy fingers in a light switch socket, and as she pulls away and Jessica laughs – giggles, cupping her wet lips, I can’t believe we just did that – Ellie feels the cavern in her chest close just an inch.
She was about to thank her, but then she thought better of it.
Pulling away now, there’s no Jessica, it’s you, and you’re pressing your fingers to your lips like you’re holding them out to a cat, nervous as to what’s going to happen next.
Ellie leans her forehead against yours, lips numb.
You’re breathing like you’ve run a marathon. Then you kiss her again.
Ellie stumbles back from the shock, but you move with her, guiding her back until her legs hit the bed frame.
She makes a quick decision – pulls away and gets back onto your bed, hoping you follow her down. Thankfully, you do – quirk a nervous smile and knee walk over to her, spreading your legs and clambering onto her lap.
You sit back on her thighs with your knees pressed against her hips.
The position is a memory re-lived, except this time, you’re both alert – no sleep to mask the feeling, just the nerves pulsating through your veins. New new new, it’s saying.
Ellie reaches out and steadies your hips.
Taking a shaky breath, she slips her thumbs under the fabric of your shirt and runs the length of your shorts. The skin there burns, heat radiating off of you like a furnace, and it’s as if you enjoy the touch, as you take Ellie’s hands and cup them with your own, keeping them against your skin, before dragging them around your hips.
Ellie catches your eyes, breath lodged in her throat.
It stays there while you run her fingers up and under your shirt, painstakingly moving her hands over your stomach, over your rib cage, and Ellie’s heart swells in her chest as the tips of her fingers feel the underwire of your bra.
Ellie can’t decide what she wants.
There are too many options – kiss you, undress you – and she so badly wants all of them all at once. When you finally drag her palms over your breasts, she feels your nipples pressing through the thin and lacey fabric, and her belly swirls, the pressure pushing low.
Your breath rattles in your chest. “You okay?” Ellie asks, and instead of answering, you bow down to kiss her.
This kiss is different. It’s desperate. Tinged with the need to tell Ellie it's okay, it's okay, as you slip your tongue in her mouth. She groans.
It’s deep and low, echoing around the room, and there’s a fleeting second where Ellie is embarrassed, but you swallow the sound down, hips reacting, pressing into her crotch.
Ellie aches with the memory of before.
She wants to tease you, wants to say, you gonna come like this again? but you drag your lips over to her neck, and she whines pathetically.
Oh fuck, she thinks. Ellie goes liquid, like syrup. She melts into the mattress, hands relax on your breasts, and just – lets you pepper kisses over her throat. Let’s you run your tongue under her jaw, and her hips buck in response. Jolt up into your crotch, and your breathing changes, now coming out in long, deep pulls.
You mark her neck with your mouth, and Ellie feels the suck of your lips in her gut. Her hands go exploring, sliding over your tits, and she rubs her thumbs over your nipples, listening for your breathing stutter.
When you mumble a desperate fuck, into her throat, Ellie suddenly wants you on your back.
She knocks the pair of you over, and you fall back onto your mattress, grinning up at Ellie with a wild smile. You take her in. Eyes flutter over her like butterflies, taking in her statue as she sits on top of you. Suddenly, though, your smile changes. Goes nervous.
“What does this mean for us?” you whisper, and Ellie shakes her head, moving to kiss you again. Now on top, she swells with the feeling of control.
“Don’t think about it,” she mumbles, then tastes cherry again.
Ellie’s a hypocrite because all she does is think about it.
Up all night in bed, thinking about it. Thinking about how she wants you as her girlfriend, but she hasn’t even taken you out on a date yet.
Doesn’t know about your family. Your friends. Doesn’t know your favourite movie, or colour. All she knows is your weed order. The thought makes her sick with shame.
The mumble of her name coming out of your lips brings her back.
You stuff her shirt in your hands, and Ellie wants it off.
Wants your hands all over her, wants to grind her hips into yours like you did hers, with your hands on her hips guiding her.
“Wanna see,” you mumble, tugging at her shirt, and Ellie’s skin prickles.
She drags her hips back, the seam of her jeans pushing against her crotch, and sits up straight. She grins, all teeth, then fists the shirt, pulling it up her chest. The lines of her muscles are revealed, along with a few white scars that dot her stomach and back. She’s wearing a casual cotton bra, but you look at her as if she’s donning silk. “So pretty,” you whisper, blinking up at her, and that shame that sat inside of her dispels. You slide your hands over her chest, and the warmth of them pushes into her bloodstream. “Pretty?” Ellie quirks, needing something to distract herself from the languid movement of your hands. You trail your fingers over her ribcage, then push your pointer up her breast bone, mouth open an inch, ignoring her, and Ellie’s limbs go jelly.
You’ve got your goddamn explorer hat on as you drag the base of your palm between her tits, your spare hand lazily rubbing her hip bone.
“What’re you doing?” she asks, words coming out as a breathy whisper. You flash a small smile, “committing you to memory.” A dangerous pressure builds in Ellie’s heart. Her cheeks bloom red, her skin prickles, and she feels light-headed, as if you’ve removed all the oxygen in the room.
You hook a finger around the elastic of her bra and tug her forward. Ellie catches herself on the mattress beside your head just as you kiss her, pushing your tongue into her mouth and crotch up into hers.
She shudders.
The kiss is all tongue, desperate, as she bumps her nose against yours to taste you. She’s preoccupied with your mouth, so she doesn’t notice your hand sliding between her thighs. When she does, she forgets how to kiss. “S-Shit,” Ellie stutters, caught off guard. Your touch is gentle, just, lazily rubbing your fingers into her jeans. There’s a lot of fabric between you, thus Ellie’s left the chase the friction.
Resting her forehead against yours, she clutches the sheets beside you, rolling her hips into your hand. She blinks at you, opening her eyes, and you’re staring at her like she’s an artwork – trying to memorise every brush stroke.
You bump your nose against hers, flexing your palm. Ellie hums again.
“You sure you wanna do that?” she jokes, clutching onto any semblance of sanity. You give her a lazy smile, lips wet with her spit. “’s ’only fair.
“Not –” Ellie starts, but chokes, your knuckle just hitting the top of her pussy. Her eyes flutter closed, mouth opening an inch, and you must sense the shift, because you keep your hand there, nodding, knowing what she was going to say before she said it.
“Gonna make you come 'cause I want to, not ‘cause I have to.” “Fuck – okay,” Ellie relents. There’s no way she’s going to leave in the middle of this. She can’t. She’d probably collapse mid-way. A pressure pushes between her thighs, hot and constant. Her pussy clenches around nothing and she whispers something. Sounds like your name.
Been a minute since she’d had a hand other than hers between her legs.
Ellie lazily chases your palm, thinking that If she moves too quickly, this moment will poof into a dream. Doesn’t want to scare it away.
To hide her red face, she nuzzles into your throat, roles reversed from that morning, except Ellie didn’t have her hand between your thighs. She tells herself it’s her turn to do that next.
You pop the button on her jeans, and Ellie glances down at your hands, seeing/feeling them tug at the band.
You turn into her head, “Jesus, these painted on or something?” and Ellie breathes a laugh, “Didn’t expect someone else taking them off.” “I need easy access from now on, only sweatpants.” “Noted.” Your smile goes silly, “preferably those grey ones you wore when I came over that time, when I made you dinner.” “Thought you liked those ones, caught you staring at my ass.” “No you did not.” Ellie kisses your neck, “It’s so sexy when you gaslight me.” You huff, “You gonna help me take them off, or watch me struggle?” and a slow grin builds across Ellie’s face. “Wanna see you work for it.” “Well, you’ll be watching for a while. Enjoy the show!” you joke, trying to drag the denim off of her hips. You grunt loudly, brow furrowed as you tug.
Finally, you throw your hands up with a huff, then pout and cross your arms. Ellie’s leaned back at this point, and she mimics your face.
“Defeated by The Gap,” Ellie sighs. “I’m gonna put in a complaint. Tell them that their stupid jeans stopped my girlf—” you catch yourself, eyes widening.
Ellie goes still.
There’s a second where she hears the crowd cheering in the background, but it turns out it’s a kid crying on the street outside.
“What did you just say?” she asks, tone filled with awe. She cannot help the shit-eating grin that splays across her face. It’s so big that you have to cover your face from the shine. “I said nothing.” “Um, I heard something.” “You didn’t hear anything.” “I heard the word girl and then an ‘F’ sound.” “You didn’t! I’m telling you; you’re hearing things. Going crazy.” “Ummmmmm,” Ellie drags, squinting down at you.
She tries to pull your hands away, but you won’t budge. “I heard something!” “I was going to say, girl fellow!” “Girl what?” Ellie laughs, eyes alight with humour.
“Yeah—” you start, pulling your hands away and masking your features. You’re a beacon of control.
“Girl fellow. It’s this new thing I coined. A girl who is a fellow, as in friend.” Ellie squints, “Fellow means boy, you weirdo.” “No it—” you frown. “Does it?” “Yes, have you not seen Robin Hood?” You pause, “No.” “Oh my god!” Ellie erupts. “How have you not seen Robin Hood? I used to be obsessed with it.” “Everything makes so much sense now.” “The fuck does that mean?”
You push your hands into her hips, fingers tickling. “Do you have a pointy bow and arrow at home? A little green hat?” “Shut up,” Ellie laughs, trying to bat your hands away. She catches them. “That makes so much sense,” you start, joking around, “You’re far too into social justice.” “How are you bullying me about world change? You just called me your girlfriend!” “Fellow!” you correct. “That means girl boy!” You grin triumphantly, “Welcome to the 21st century, Ellie.” She rolls her eyes, “you’re so annoying.” “Your jeans are annoying.” “My jeans are cute.” You point a finger at her, “I’m gonna fight your jeans.”
Ellie dips low and kisses you, mumbling into your mouth, “mm, my money’s on the jeans,” and you wrap your thigh around her ass, using it as leverage to roll her onto her back.
You suddenly slide down, standing at the edge of the bed and shoving your hands into the band of her trousers. With a determined look, you manage to pull them down, “fuck your jeans.”
They end up on the floor, and Ellie’s left in a pair of boxers and her bra. She’d clap for you if she wasn’t so suddenly dazed. You appear on top of her, and she automatically wraps her arms around your shoulders, humming contently as you kiss her.
When her brain comes back to reality, she manages to switch positions again, knees pressing beside your thighs. With a tentative touch, you trace your hand over her stomach, distracting her with the wet of your kiss.
When your fingers touch the band of her underwear, Ellie’s breathing changes. It’s all suddenly real.
“Wanna stop?” you breathe, tone sincere and gaze gentle. Despite the bubble in her chest, Ellie has never wanted to continue something more. She shakes her head, eager. “Fuck no.”
Your sweet giggle distills the tension. “Good,” you grin, sliding your fingers lower, “wanted to do this since I met you.”
The tips of your fingers drag over her clothed pussy, gentle and soft. Ellie releases a shaky breath.
There’s just a piece of flimsy cotton stopping you from skin on skin, but she’s so wet that it feels that way, anyway.
Her eyes flutter closed, the sensation lulling her, fueling her with dopamine, and she buries her head in the crook of your neck, flexing her hips to meet your hand.
You drag the corner of your knuckle up her clothed slit, pushing into her clit when you get to the top. Ellie groans quietly, and you grin into the side of her head, rolling your knuckle into her, and she moans.
“Fuck, s’good.” “Yeah?” you ask, and Ellie nods. Propelled by her quiet desperation, you twist your hand and push a finger against her damp clit – the wet fabric showing the lines of her pussy – and roll it gently.
The fabric in the way makes it dirtier, more desperate, and makes Ellie moan pathetically into your neck, forgetting you’ve got roommates. She chases your hand.
Hips stir up, wet heat coiling in her belly and pushing into her cunt. Is this what you felt? That morning in her apartment?
The fire is quick to rise, and it’s only been a couple of minutes of her grinding into your palm when her pussy clenches, heat pushing at the back of her clit.
“Mm,” she hums, inhaling a shaky breath. Her thighs begin to shake. “Baby, you’re gonna make me come,” she hushes into your ear, and she swears she hears you whimper. You turn to look at her, and pout, “Want it on my fingers, Ellie,” you admit, eyes innocent, wide with wonder, and Ellie’s jaw clenches.
Her hips lose their rhythm, and how the fuck is she in control right now? She doesn’t feel that way. Feels like she lost any semblance of control when you flipped her over and pulled her jeans off. “Fuck, okay. Okay. Shit. Take my – fuck,” she stumbles, and you push your fingers under the band of her underwear, asking, “Can I?” in such a pure tone that Ellie has to close her eyes and breathe through her nose. “Yeah baby,” she nods, “s’okay. Fuck. It’s okay.”
You drag your fingers through her pubic hair – eyes on her the whole time – before you stuff your pointer and index against her wet clit. You start to roll the nerve, and Ellie chokes on her spit. Her body shudders.
She’s in your goddamn dorm room in your sorority with your hand down her pants.
You’re watching her intently. Glazed eyes gazing at her features, fingers controlling the way her brows furrow and cheeks bloom red. It’s wholly intimate. Ellie’s slick coats your fingers.
“So hot, Ellie.”
Her body flushes – she has to bury her head in your neck again, where she nods. She grinds her cunt into your hand, forcing you to press harder and roll quicker. “Mm, fuck,” Ellie swears, spit dribbling over her lips, drunk on your fingers, “Fuck, m’ gonna come.” She feels the familiar pressure behind her clit, the heat that sears – almost painful. You twist into her, nodding, saying, “Give it to me El’s.” Then, “please.”
The wave rushes up and pulls her under, rendering her voiceless and still, before it crashes, and she gushes over your hand, chasing the spin of your fingers as she shakes. “Mm, god, god, shit” she whimpers, voice muffled by your neck, trying so hard to keep quiet, but fuck, she’s not in control of her body. She clenches the duvet as her pussy clenches and un-clenches, clit spasming, whole body slick with sweat.
Her hips grind into your fist, eyes rolled back, mumbling curses into your throat, and she’s clenching the duvet so tight that her knuckles go white.
Then someone calls your name.
You freeze. Fingers go still.
Ellie wants to cry, but somewhere in her drunk mind, she realises the severity of the situation.
When you don’t respond, your name gets called again.
“Fuck,” you curse, then “Ellie, baby, I’m sorry, you gotta get off of me.”
Ellie manages to find the energy to roll off of you, and you get up, legs stumbling before you reach the door.
“Y-Yeah?” you call out through the wood.
Ellie lays boneless on your bed, breathing deeply through her nose. Her boxers are pushed low, pubic hair on show, but she doesn’t have the power to sort herself out.
She should be nervous at the idea of being caught, but fuck, her clit still throbs with the memory of your fingers. She languidly blinks at the ceiling, trying to calm her heart.
How the fuck did that just happen?
“Meeting soon, you coming?” the faceless voice calls, and you mumble a curse before saying, “Yeah! Gimmie a minute.”
When you turn to her, Ellie’s already gazing at you. You quirk a small, sad smile, and Ellie nods, understanding.
“Lemme just,” she starts, rubbing her face, “find the energy.” You giggle at her. “Let me help you put your stupid jeans on.” Ellie props herself up by her elbows, beaming, “My top down there, too?” “Got it.”
She manages to shove her jeans on, wincing when she knocks her sensitive clit. You eye her.
“Listen, I—” you start, clearly flustered. You motion to her, “—Would take better care of you after but.” “Whoa – what?” Ellie cuts you off, shoving her shirt on with a frown.
You purse your lips, “like, cook you dinner or kiss your forehead or something.” “You’ve already cooked me dinner, and you can kiss my forehead whenever you want.” “I mean. I don’t usually make a girl come and then dip.” “Oh,” Ellie frowns, “But this is different.” You pout, “Still feel bad.” “Don’t,” Ellie firmly spouts. She takes your hands and kisses your forehead. “I feel good, you should feel good.” “It was good?” you ask, suddenly lit up and eager to hear more. Ellie laughs. Her body is filled with a warm, buttery feeling. She’s still drunk on you, lethargic from coming, and she doesn’t have the space to panic.
Her subconscious tries to tell her everything that has happened that should cause her concern.
She nearly called you her girlfriend, then made you come on her double bed with a flowery bedspread. Now she feels bad because she doesn’t have enough time to give you adequate aftercare. Dude.
Still, Ellie shows no alarm when she kisses your forehead and says, “I’ll call you.”
It’s only when she gets home, looks in the mirror and sees her lips glittery with your lip-gloss, that reality sets in.
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dearharriet · 29 days
Note
okay hello hi me again with a james potter request if u feel like it 🦌🦌 how about a drabble about reader calling james a pet name for the first time like baby or honey or something and he just melts on the spot and gives her the biggest lovesick puppy eyes ever and then begs her to always call him that and refuses to answer to james because ‘that’s baby to u!!!!!’ Or something<333 love u hope you’re well
ty for the request! <3 (wc: 495) fem!r
“It says we could use banana as a substitute for egg, did you know?”
You shuffle to James’ side as he pauses in the baking aisle, craning your neck to see his phone over the bulky shoulder blocking it.
“Oh yeah,” you hum, “I’ve seen that.”
James turns his wrinkled nose your way, a wink of amusement in his eyes.
“That cannot be good.”
Scanning the row of mixes beside the cart, you palm his side, his shirt soft and thin under your fingers.
“No, it’s kind of alright, actually.”
You blink back up at him, smiling, even when his big eyes bug even further under his glasses.
“You’ve tried it?”
Laughing, you encourage the cart forward again, and James with it.
“Can you see what we need next, please?” You croon. James’ eyes soften, and he looks back to the recipe page as he walks.
“Er, do we have baking powder?”
“Yes.”
He scrolls an inch further.
“Lemons?”
“I was thinking we’d just use that lemon juice in the fridge,” you say, shrugging.
“What?” James stops walking. “Baby, no.”
He steers the cart around, making a break for the produce section. “We are making these cupcakes right, my darling. I need all the best ingredients.”
You just laugh and trail after him. “It really won’t make a difference…”
As you catch up to him, James is hoisting a full netted pouch of lemons out of its sales basket.
“Jamie, we only need one,” you say, a bemused smile pulling at your lips. He looks to you, still holding the lemons up like a fresh catch.
“That’s quitter’s talk. We just need to make more cupcakes, s’all.”
He drops them in the cart, and then creeps toward you.
“Whatever you say, baby,” you tease.
James freezes before he can reach you. A slippery grin parts his lips, creasing around his eyes.
“What’d you call me?”
Flipping back through your words, you realize what you’ve said too late. In your mind, James and baby have been synonymous for a good few weeks now, you’ve just been trying to play it cool, and for good reason.
James will never let this go.
“I—” You huff, relenting. “Baby.”
In a split second James is around you, lemons forgotten in exchange for a snug embrace that warms your cheeks.
“James, we’re in public.”
“Who?” He asks, a grin pressed against your temple, and a strong hand between your shoulder blades.
Cushioning your chin on his chest, you look up at him. James has bigger heart eyes now than he did on your first date, which is saying a lot.
You know the two of you look painfully smitten, and that any passersby might be bothered by the PDA, but it’s hard to stifle your affection for James.
“Can you call me that more often?” He asks gently, so lovelorn that it nips your heart a little. “I really liked it.”
And how can you say no to that?
+
thank u for reading! xx
masterlist
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propertyofwicked · 1 month
Text
SECRETS part 6 - LN
warnings: angst, lots of swearing angry max, angry lando, angry y/n - everyone's mad. potentially a happy ending? (u have to read to find out :) ), cheeky bit of fluff
part 1 -> part 2 -> part 3 -> part 4 -> part 5 -> next part!
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“you fucking lied right to my face, the both of you!” max said, raising his voice and breaking the silence in his living room, “i asked you a year ago and you both lied to me.”
y/n and lando quickly realised that arriving together to talk to max was quite possibly a mistake. the drive to max’s house had started off well, the music flowing through the speakers and easy conversation between the two helped. yet, the closer they got, the more anxious they both started to feel.
they were all in the living room, P had scuttered off to the kitchen, busying herself with baking. max was directing every profanity he could think of towards both lando and his sister, their mother would be horrified to learn max even knew these words let alone the fact he was screaming them at her youngest daughter, y/n thought to herself.
it’s her nature to defend herself, but for the first time in her life, she sat silently, twisting her rings around her fingers. max was so angry, she figured he wouldn’t listen to anything she had to say anyways at this moment in time. so she sat silently, taking the abuse.
“have you slept together?” max suddenly asked, his voice finally calm. y/n’s face grew red, lando stuttering.
“so that’s a yes, she who prides herself on being honest and can’t even give me a straight answer,” he snorts.
“i’m an adult, max. stop being so immature and overbearing,” y/n finally spoke up, her tone bold even though she wanted to do nothing more than cry, “what does it even matter? you’re going to get mad either way.”
“of course i’m mad! you,” he stated, pointing a finger at lando, “have been fucking my sister behind my back.”
“stop saying that shit - it’s not like that.”
“no? then what is it like?” max shouted back, his anger once again bubbling to the surface.
“I LOVE HER! ok, i love her,” lando said, finally raising his voice. the room fell silent. even the blender in the kitchen stopped, letting everyone know P was listening in.
“you love me?” y/n asked softly, turning to face lando. he looked almost scared. he chose to ignore her, moving his head up to stare into max’s eyes.
“max, i love her. i think i always have. i would do anything i could for her,” lando said, his voice returning to his normal tone. max said nothing, he simply turned on his heel and left the room.
“i tried angel,” lando said to the girl next to him, his arm stretching out to rub her thigh softly.
“i know you did,” she replied sadly, “so - you love me?”
“of course i do,” he replied, smiling at her.
“don’t take my lack of reciprocation as a rejection. i just uh- i just need time,” she said, panicking slightly and fumbling her words.
“i don’t expect you to say anything back, my love. we’ll sort this out, i promise.”
she wants to believe him, she really does, but max leaving the room was a bad sign.
“you can’t promise me that,” she says, his hands coming to cup her face and press a sweet kiss to her forehead.
“i will do everything i can to sort things out with max,” he says kissing her head again, before pushing himself off the sofa to follow max’s footsteps out of the room.
y/n sat in the silence, thinking only of the way max’s face fell in a mix of anger and betrayal before he stormed out of the room. too much had happened in the past 4 days, and she hadn’t given herself time to process a single part of it. the tears started flowing, and she feared they would never stop as she started coughing from the intensity of her sobs. P must’ve heard her from the kitchen, as not long after she’d started crying, P was sat next to y/n, pulling her body down to lay her head on her lap, her hand coming to stroke her back softly.
“he’ll come around y/n. he loves you, he can’t stay mad at you forever.”
“he can, and he will,” y/n responds, another wave of tears rolling sideways down her face, landing on P’s trousers.
meanwhile, max was in his room, pacing out of pure anger.
“mate i-,” lando said as he walked in the room.
“no, i dont wanna hear it. you promised me you would never d-” he interupts.
“i know! i know what i said. and i regret it.”
“you regret promising me you’d never defile my sister?”
“i regret not telling you how i felt about her. i regret making that stupid promise when it’s all i wanted.”
“all you wanted was to defile my sister? great argument lando, thanks for stopping by. you can fuck off now.”
“all i wanted was to love your sister. to give her the fucking world if she’d let me.”
“what?”
“i love her. she’s intelligent, she’s strong willed, she’s confident in herself, and i think she’s the most beautiful woman i’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting,” he says, barely stopping to breathe, but max was listening - finally. the two friends looked at each other, both of them slightly shaking under the pressure.
“you really love her?” max asks after a few moments of silence, his voice the lowest it had been for hours.
“i do.”
“this isn’t just for a shag?”
“are you joking?”
“just answer the fucking question.”
“no, it’s not just for a shag. i want to spend to rest of my life with her.”
“ok.”
“ok?” lando repeated, confused.
“i’m not ok with this, but i will be eventually. so long as you don’t hurt her.”
“i think you should be more worried about her hurting me,” lando joked in attempt to ease the awkwardness, to his relief max smiled slightly.
“if she hurt you, id be the proudest ive ever been,” he jokes back, earning a small snort from lando.
lando backs himself towards the door, gripping the handle.
“you coming?” he asks max, cocking his head to the side slightly in questioning.
“nah i just need a few minutes to sort myself out.”
“alright mate. i think you need to speak to y/n.”
“don’t tell me what to do,” max quips back, lando holding his hands up in defence before leaving the room, closing the door behind him.
when lando re-entered the living room, he saw y/n laying on P’s lap, crying softly, his entrance causing both girls to look up at him. he breathed out a sigh before announcing -
“i think it’s all gonna be ok.”
“i’m going to go an talk to him,” y/n said boldly, sitting up and wiping any remaining tears from her eyes, still trying to regain her regular breathing.
“are you sure that’s a good idea?” lando asked, voice lace with genuine concern.
“i don’t care. i need to let him know that this is not acceptable,” and with that, she left the room. lando and P looked at each other, their eyes both conveying a sense of dread for the impending fall out.
“max?” she asked, knocking on his door.
“go away.”
“no,” she said, pushing the door fully open and sauntering into the room.
“y/n i-”
“no, you’ve done your shouting. it’s my time to talk,” y/n tone was harsh, but it worked. max sat back in the chair, silently, allowing her to finally speak her mind.
“i didn’t do this out of disrespect for you,” she prefaced, breathing in a deep breath before continuing, “i didn’t expect this to happen. i didn’t think any of this was going to happen.”
“i know.”
“but that does not give you any right to decided what or who i do,” she declares, max grimacing slightly at her choice of words, “you made him promise to stay away from me! that’s not on, max. he was my friend too and even if anything else was happening you had absolutely no right to make that decision for me.”
he says nothing, simply nodding at his sister as he digests her words.
“you owe me an apology. for thinking you can control my life and for the way you have behaved in the last 3 days. it’s not the fucking eighteen hundreds, you cannot take this ‘alpha male’ role in my life and make decisions about who i date,” she adds, using her fingers to make quotation marks.
“i know that now,” he responds, guilt laced in his voice.
“what do you mean you ‘know that now’? you should have always known that. you wouldn’t tell sam or theo who they can date, would you?” she asks.
“no, i wouldn’t,” again, responding with a sad sigh, “i’m sorry y/n.”
“you better be. and you better start behaving like you are.”
“i will.”
“starting with buying me a new car,” she jokes, finally uncrossing her arms and smiling softly at him.
“catch yourself on,” he laughs back.
“it’s ok, god loves a trier - besides, i’m pretty sure lando offered to buy me one if he got podium.”
“on second thought, maybe i will buy you a new car.”
the two laughed together, an air of awkwardness still hanging between them. finally, he pushed himself off his chair, walking over to her and embracing her in a tight hug.
“im sorry y/n, im so sorry,” he mumbled into her ear.
“it’s ok max, i don’t think id be too impressed if you started fucking my friends either.”
“ew dont - dont talk about sex or you having it,” he shudders, “in my brain, you’re still 7 and shaving the heads of your barbies.”
“fine.”
“will you do me a favour?” he asks, sheepishly.
“depends.”
“can you and, him, you know, tone it down in front of me. just for a bit? just till i get used to it?”
“i didn’t intend on jumping his bones in front of you anyways, if that’s what you mean?” she jokes.
“y/n,” he groans in feigned annoyance.
“i’m sorry i’m sorry,” she apologises, holding her hands up in defence, the exact same way lando had earlier.
“you and him are probably a good match. you have the same personality. i think i just never wanted to admit it.”
“max fewtrell, stubborn? i never would’ve guessed.”
“i think it’s genetic.”
★ ☆ ✦ ✧ ✩ ✶
tag list: @harrysdimple05 @scopeiguess @hiireadstuff @landosgirlxoxo @natt9598 @phantomxoxo @val-writes @secretgal66 @ririyulife @littlehoneyfreak @leclercdream @mehrmonga @eviethetheatrefreak @thatoneembarrasingmoment @doofenshmirtzevil-inc @formula1mount @lottef1 @rayna-s @5starl1ght @cthgee @thesiduation @urfavsgf @littlehoneyfreak
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cinnnamongrl · 1 year
Text
pretty when you’re high- ellie williams
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pairing: dealer!ellie x fem!reader
summary: you and ellie are best friends despite your differences. ellie gets you high for the first time and the lines of your friendship become blurred
warnings: [18+] mdni, language, use of marijuana, kissing, light smut, some nudity, nipple play, top!ellie, bottom!reader, mutual pining
authors notes: this is possibly part 1 of 2. lmk if anyone would want that? pls send any feedback u may have, would really appreciate it. <3 update: part 2 can be found here
ellie williams was your best friend. you two were as close as friends could be. and despite what people around college thought, you didn’t find anything strange about the fact that the college’s best dealer was best friends with a shy innocent grade A student like you. but it was obvious to everyone that you two, despite being complete opposites, were inseparable.
what you hoped wasn’t obvious to everyone, was the massive crush you were harbouring on your best friend. you couldn’t help it; you thought she was the most beautiful girl in the world. the way she laughs, her smile, her voice, the way her hands look as she rolls a joint. sometimes you’d just stare at her while she was doing sometime mundane like talking to someone at a party. you’d watch the way her mouth would move as she talks, how her eyebrows would raise in question, how her toned arms would move as she animated a funny story.
you felt like a lovesick puppy. but your friendship meant too much to risk fucking it up, so you made your peace with this one-sided infatuation.
as best friends do, you two did everything together; went to parties, listened to music, talked until the sun came up, had study/smoke sessions. meaning you studied, and she smoked.
“can you pass me that pen els” you asked, pointing to the biro a few inches from where ellie sat on your dorm floor, joint in her hand.
“what’s the magic word?”
“… abracadabra” you joked.
“wrong. now you don’t get your pen, sorry babe” she teased, picking it up and holding it behind her back.
your face flushed slightly from the pet name despite knowing she meant nothing by it.
“ellie i need to finish this essay. give me that pen” you warned
“why don’t you fuck off the essay and smoke with me instead” she offered hopefully, with a wide smile
you sighed.
“you know i don’t do that stuff” you said rolling your eyes. “and professor druckmann will end me if i don’t get this handed in by monday”
“well i will end you if you don’t stop being a priss and have a smoke with me. just a little bit, see if you like it.”
you frowned but said nothing. you had to admit you were slightly tempted by her offer. you’d always declined at parties, worrying about being in an unsafe environment. but just you and ellie, the person you trusted most in the world, in your dorm room… that’s pretty safe right?
“well.. i- i don’t know how” you said quietly.
“good thing i’m here then” she winked at you and scooched next to where you were sat on the floor, your back against your bed frame.
she held out the joint in front of you.
“just take a drag of mine. inhale and then try to keep it in your lungs okay?”
you looked at her and bit your lip in apprehension. you tried to ignore her eyes wandering down to your mouth as you did so.
“o-okay” you replied, as you took the joint from her fingers and held it up to your mouth, inhaling slowly and letting it ‘stay in your lungs’ whatever that meant, then slowly exhaling.
ellie was watching you with a small smile, feeling a sense of pride at you picking it up so quickly.
“atta girl. knew my smart girl would be a fast learner” she smirked as she playfully nudged your side and you let out a giggle.
~~~~~
a few hits later and your head was starting to feel fuzzy. ellie had taken the joint away insisting you not get ahead of yourself on your first time, missy and her slight condescending tone mixed with the weed had you feeling all tingly.
“feels nice els. ‘s a nice feeling” you spoke
“yeah?” she laughed.
“mhm. feel all fuzzy and tingly” you smiled and looked at the ground through heavy lids.
“i tend to have that effect on women” she joked, mouth turning up into a smirk.
cocky shit
“yeah” you said to yourself, lower than a whisper.
“hm?” she lowered her head to your face.
you snapped your head up.
“nothing” you mumbled.
she laughed and put her hand on your leg, just above your knee.
she was always touchy; often grabbing your hand to lead you somewhere instead of just telling you where to go, hand on your lower back as she stood behind you, or playfully grabbing your arm as she laughed at something you said. she pretended she didn’t notice the way you’d slightly tense up or the way your cheeks would go pink whenever she’d do this. despite the way she felt about you, she didn’t want to assume anything; maybe you blushed when she’d compliment you because you were shy. doesn’t mean you have feelings for her… right?
“you’re pretty when you’re high” she mused as she watched your eyes flutter, a blush creeping up on your face. there it is she thought.
“can’t say stuff to me like that” you said, looking down
“like what, babe?”
“like- like you’re pretty a-and babe. ‘s not fair on me” you uttered, voice small.
“but you are pretty.” a moment passed. “you’re beautiful.”
you looked up at her, searching her face for any hint of mockery or light-heartedness, but you couldn’t find it. your body felt warm and the fuzzy feeling all over felt even more intense.
“i’ve always thought you were beautiful,” she spoke. “the prettiest thing i’d ever seen.”
“ellie” you breathed out, heart beating fast and head swirling.
her hand moved up your leg, resting on your upper thigh and she moved her face closer to yours, eyes landing on your lips.
“can i kiss you?” she asked in a whisper, eyes not leaving your mouth as she spoke.
all you could do was nod, the combination of her words and the high making you unable to form a reply.
ellie grabbed your face with two hands and attached her mouth to yours. her lips were softer than you had imagined and she kissed you with a sweetness that juxtaposed the way her strong hands held your face. you kissed her back eagerly and it didn’t take long for her to take control of the kiss as she slipped her tongue inside your mouth, making you let out a small moan.
“fuck” she uttered against your mouth. “wanted to do this for so long”
she continued kissing you as one of her hands came down to rest on your waist. you felt dizzy with how turned on you were just from her kissing you.
“more.” you choked out. “please el”
“what is it you want baby? tell me” she replied, the hand that was resting on your waist, slowly coming up to stroke your side under your shirt.
“need you to- to touch me”
“i can do that” she smirked and grabbed your waist with both hands and placed you up onto her lap. her eyes sparkled as she looked at you, head titling up slightly from where you were placed on top of her, and you smiled shyly. lightly placing your hands on her shoulders, you kissed her sweetly. she dragged her hands from your waist up to your boobs and cupped them, fingers lightly ghosting over your nipples, then lightly pinching them.
“els” you moaned, head rolling back. you closed your eyes and let yourself focus completely on the blissful feeling of her hands on you.
“arms up” she instructed. you obeyed, lifting your arms up so she could lift your shirt up and over your head. she looked at you, green eyes now darker with lust.
“so fucking pretty" she muttered, almost to herself.
“this why you wanted to get me high?” you let out a small giggle.
“no,” her mouth upturned into a smile “but apparently when you’re high you forget to hide the way you stare at me.”
your eyes went wide and she laughed.
“‘s not a bad thing, it’s got you into my lap, hasn’t it?” she quipped.
“i hate you”
“‘s that right?” she titled her head playfully.
“mhm, i-“
she cut you off, capturing your mouth in a heated kiss, bringing her arms around your back and forcing your body to melt into hers.
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serevena · 5 months
Text
U&I
Ex!Ellie Williams x fem!reader
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a.n - this is so cliche and boring but idc..I’m obsessing over U&I by the neighborhood rn so ?? I obviously had to make a fic. Enjoy. <3
warnings - provocative language, angst, smut, making out, hickeys, pussy eating (e & r!receiving) fingering (r!receiving), 69ing, arguing, mentions of Ellie cheating..oops, sub!ellie if you squint, unrealistic but oh well, the smut is rushed because I wanted this out already..sorryyy..
No matter what I'm doing, I keep thinkin' 'bout you and I..
What the fuck am I supposed to do about you and I?
Knock. Knock. Knock.
Knock, knock, knock.
3:45AM, you opened your eyes to hear the sound of multiple knocks—almost bangs at your door. The tv was the only source of light in your room aside from the flashing numbers on your alarm clock. You sat up for a few seconds, just staring off into space before you swallowed thickly, feeling a little sore spot in your throat. This was your least favorite part of waking up..when it wasn't waking up from being interrupted by some prick in the middle of the night, that is.
you expected the knocks to go away after a while, but they just..didn't. you felt a sense of dread, nervous that this person would like, shoot you or something the second you opened your door. You immediately regretted not getting a ring doorbell camera from that sketchy saleswoman at walmart the other day..it would've been very beneficial right now..maybe.
Your feet touched the cold floor before you walked towards the door, flicking on a dimmed light to the kitchen before your hand touches the knob. No peephole either. You were ready to just drill a hole in your door and hope for the best. You unlocked your door and opened it, partially prepared to just feel a knife or bullet piercing through you. Or maybe they’d rob you and leave you alone in an empty house.
Or maybe, just maybe..
It was—
“Ellie.” You said, feeling a bunch of mixed emotions in your body, none of them good. She stared at you, her hair dark and damp from the rain outside. She didn’t smile, she didn’t invite herself in, she just stood there and stared at you, a glint of sadness in her eyes.
But you couldn’t fucking care less.
“Why the hell are you here?” You spoke coldly, and she didn’t necessarily respond, but her brows frowned and it took her a while to speak up, her fingers fiddled with one another as her lips formed a thin line ever so slightly.
“I’m sorry.” Was all she said before you quickly cut her off. You saw this through text, heard this the night you kicked her out, heard this through voicemails..it was just a word to you now.
“Fuck you.”
Ellie swallowed thickly, visibly upset by your words, but could she blame you? You’d caught her kissing another girl, and though she never admitted it and you’ve most likely been in denial, probably slept with her.
“Can I just…please?” She eyed the inside of your house, her green eyes staring daggers into everything. It was all..different. You changed everything.
You didn’t respond and you were on the verge of cursing her out one last time and shutting the door in her face. But you did that last time. You let out a sigh, not a yes or a no, just a sigh. But Ellie, oh, she took that as a yes and walked in, letting out a small hum under her breath from the warm that hit her skin the second she walked in. But she didn’t get comfortable knowing there was a possibly you’d like, kill her, or something. You slammed the door, making it known that you weren’t agreeing with a single thing she was doing. But she had to get her point across..whatever fucking point that is, anyway.
You both turned around to face each other, your arms crossed before practically hours went by of the two of you just staring at each other. Ellie’s chapped lips formed a thin line again before she licked them and spoke up, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.
when you're away..
well, nothing ever seems to come out right.
“You didn’t..I didn’t..” you gave her somewhat of a mocking look at the fact that she couldn’t get a proper sentence out. She walked all the way here and didn’t have a speech prepared? “I didn’t mean to. It was one time and I swear to you—” “save it.” You cut her off, not buying it. “I’ve heard this shit one too many times, Ellie. It happened, I’m done. Period.” You raise your brows and your tone was almost as if you were scolding a child, and again, Ellie looked hurt, but she tried to feign a calmer approach in order to not make you feel sympathy. She knew she deserved it.
Ellie looked down at her shoes before she touched your foot with the tip of it, her brows raised and frowned at the same time as she blows a bit through her lips. “It’s not an excuse..I’m just..sorry.” She mumbled, never looking back into your eyes. She’d never seen this side of you, or, she had, but that was the last time she saw you, and it scared her to death.
And then the silence came. You partially expected her to just give up and walk out, never seeing her again. But she didn’t. And you had nothing else to say, you were pretty much giving her the silent treatment.
Creak. Creak. Creak.
The faint sound of your floorboards echoed off the walls before you realized Ellie was, in front of you. Like, inches away from your face. She wasn’t confident. She wasn’t sure. She was scared. Oh, she was fucking scared. But she hoped it’d work out. Even if it was for one night.
“Ellie—” you were quickly cut off by the feeling of Ellie’s lips against you, her cold hands cupping your cheeks. Don’t kiss her back. Don’t kiss her back. Don’t kiss her..back. You kissed her back. You were confused, angry, and none of it went away from the kiss, it even angered you more that she had the audacity.
But you didn’t stop her. You didn’t..want to. You felt sick, mentally. Cursing yourself for not immediately pulling away. But it all felt too familiar, and somewhat comforting, despite everything.
You began walking forward, pushing Ellie to the head of the sofa before she put her hand behind her for leverage. She gripped the back of your head and pulled you impossibly closer to her.
Seconds, Minutes passed and you couldn’t pull away from her. Faint moans exchanged between the two of you before you took it to the room. The familiar scent of it hit Ellie and for some reason made her hornier. At least that was the thing that you kept.
Drop. Drop. Drop.
Ellie’s jacket, your shirt, her shoes, every piece of fabric fell to the floor as her back hit the bed and you quickly got on top of her. Her cold hand caressed your back which sent shivers down your spine before you decided to bring your hand down to her clothed pussy. Her hips bucked from the friction as her brows furrowed and she lifted her head, looking down at your hand. “fuck..” she mumbled in a sigh.
You hadn’t had sex since Ellie. So, everything came back to you in this very moment. Just those once..for the last time. “I wanna try something out..” you mumbled as she nipped at your neck, nodding quickly, her hands on your hips before you turned around so your back was facing her. She laid there in confusion for a few seconds before you backed up, your pussy hovering over her face, and then she smirked. “Hello..” she whispered, staring directly at your pussy before her hands gripped your ass, not even wasting another second before her tongue ran laps around your folds.
“Fuck..” you said, looking back at her before you admired the fact that her cunt was right there. Your fingers began rubbing her, applying pressure on her clit and flicking it with every chance that you got which earned grunts from her, her hips bucking once more. Her callous fingers dug into your ass before she began eating you out like a starved woman, completely focused on your pussy and your pussy only.
You let out moan after moan, one of your fingers slipping into Ellie just like..that. She was so wet. She whined at that, practically drawing blood from your skin from how hard she was digging into it. She pulled away from your pussy to moan and let out hot breaths, lifting her head up as she eyes you, or, what she can see at least. You began pumping your fingers in and out of her, her chest rising and falling with every curl of your fingers “f-fuck!” She yelled out which earned a smile and a moan from you afterwards.
You felt her clench around your fingers, a brow raising at how close she already was..it’s like she hadn’t masturbated ever since that night.
And you were proven right when she came, her thighs squeezing around your fingers.
20 Minutes and another orgasm later..
You laid next to Ellie after you came not too long after, unsure of..everything. Did you wanna take her back? Did you wanna do it again? Did you wanna curse her out? Did you—
“Wanna go for a round two?” Ellie muttered, a smirk visible in her voice.
478 notes · View notes
munson-mayhem · 1 year
Note
HI! I LOVED YOUR AONUNG STORY! <3 Can you make another aonung x sully reader. Like when the sully family arrive aonung notices the reader first and he bullies her so much because hes not use to having a crush which she ignores his bullying at first then aonung friends thought he actually hates her so they take the reader outside the reef and leave her there and then aonung finds out and goes out the reef to save her. and finds her wounded. (happy ending tho) IF U DO THIS THANK YOU SO MUCH <33
Straight up disclaimer this is not good in my opinion but I did have fun writing it I’m still learning and figuring out writing but I’m excited to keep learning and trying
One shot Hidden feelings
Y/N first person POV
Ever since my family and I got here the clan leaders son has been hostile toward all of us but my twin Lo’ak and I specifically. The day we met the clan it started with just dirty looks as our time here progressed it became cruel words mixed in with those looks of dislike, it seems like he’s always looking at us waiting for the opportunity to jump in and make fun of us again. Any time I catch a glance of Ao’nung he’s already looking at me waiting for me to fail but he looks away quickly when our eyes meet. I’m with my older brother Neteyam today we’re taking a stroll around the village when we hear some yelling over towards the more deserted part of the island.
“LEAVE US ALONE” I hear the familiar voice of my sister Kiri
Neteyam is already walking towards them by time I see what’s happening, Ao’nung and his friends messing with Lo’ak and Kiri. Neteyam is already breaking up the fight as I make it there.
“You heard what she said. Leave them alone.”
He almost growls at the group messing with our siblings
We were almost free with no problems but Lo’ak went back he starts balling up his fist showing it to Ao’nung and I smirk, Neteyam and Kiri watch also knowing what Lo’ak is about to do. When Lo’ak knocks Ao’nung on his ass a big fight breaks out Neteyam joins in and my brothers hold their own pretty well for awhile until Rotxo knocks Lo’ak down with him and Ao’nung is standing over my twin,neteyam was holding off the other 3 boys pretty well so I did the only thing I could I tackled Ao’nung. As we rolled through the water on the shore he wraps his arms around me and pulls me into his chest repositioning his arm to cradle my head and protect it. When we finally stop rolling I’m on top of him our legs tangled together. When I try and sit up my legs fall to either side of his waist my hands are on his chest helping push me up when he sees me above him he sits up using his arms to lean back and smirks at me glancing to the position we’re in. I don’t realize the fight behind me had ended but Neteyam had come over and grabs me to help me up.
After getting reamed by our dad Lo’ak was sent to make peace I walked with him all the way to the beach but he left to go meet up with Ao’nung, Rotxo and one other boy that were in the water with their ilu’s I watch them clasp arms and begin to swim away, once they are out of view I walk into the water and begin to swim out and I call to an ilu intending to just swim around the village and explore a little. I’ve only been out in the water for about 10 minutes when I notice the other boys from the fight swim up to me I know their Ao’nung’s friends, when they reach me they wave and greet me.
“We’re going to meet up with Ao’nung and the others we wanted tok know if you wanted to join us” one of them said and smiled at me
“Sure” I mutter in suspicion but I know my father would want me to make peace if I could.
They lead the way as we begin to swim with our ilu’s outside the reef it’s amazing and beautiful and I don’t really think about the fact that I have no idea where we are or how to get back. We get to an area with some large rock structures they begin to slow when we all come to a stop they look back at me.
“ Ao’nung your brother and the others are on the far side of that rock island there but we’ll have to swim there without the ilu’s it’s dangerous for them, we’ll get them sorted out if you want to go meet up with them” they told me as they pointed to the island
“Okay thank you” I said as I slid off the ilu starting to swim around the rocks towards the far end of the little island. When I finally clear the edge of the island and get to the other side I stop and look around but I can’t see anyone and I start to get scared. By the time I swim back to where I left the ilu’s with the others they are long gone.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Third person POV
When Ao’nung and Rotxo got back they saw the rest of their friends standing on the shore laughing together.
“What’s so funny I bet what we have to tell you is better” Rotxo chuckled as they join the others
“We saw you with the Forrest boy and figured out what you were going to do so we went and found his twin to do the same to her now maybe both the forest kids will learn their lesson” one of the random boys laughed
Ao’nung whipped around to look at him the little leader of this dumb idea “WHAT!?” He growled. Taking one large and quick step forward towards his absolute skxawng of a friend. Ao’nung reaches forward grabs the base of this guys Queue where it connected to his skull and hair.
” where Is she ?” Ao’nung asks darkly looking like he could kill this boy. When the boy stutters and mumbles under his breath asking why it matters Ao’nung kicks his ankles from under him dropping him to the ground and presses his arm against his throat cutting off his air just a little.
“We left her at stone Island” the boy chokes and gasps out trying to claw at Ao’nung’s arm. Without hesitating Ao’nung releases the boy and jumps into the water while calling to his ilu on his way to go find the girl he’s secretly in love with.
Even going as fast as he could it took him the better part of the afternoon to get there, and once he did he couldn’t find her he was actually about to give up to go get help from his father when he notices a very odd shape up on the island. Ao’nung jumps off his ilu and begins to climb the rocks leading to the island being extra careful not to grab the extra sharp rocks or use those ones as footholds. When he gets to the top of the island he sees Y/N laying there unmoving. Fear grips his soul as he runs to her and falls to her side, she’s breathing at the very least he can see her chest rising and falling weakly. He checks her over looking for anything to explain why she’s like this, when he reaches her legs he can see a puddle of blood looking closer he sees the large gash on her foot. She must have stepped on one of the sharp rocks and cut her foot open and been unable to stop the bleeding.
Ao’nung picks up Y/N and cradles her in his arms as he carefully brings her back to his ilu and begins the journey back praying to the great mother that if Y/N is ok he’d be kinder to all the Sully’s and tell the girl in his arms just how he feels about her.
After what feels like an eternity Ao’nung finally makes it back to the village, no one seems to take much notice as he carry’s Y/N through the village to his mother the clan Tsahik.
Ronal gives her son a disapproving look knowing he’d done something but simply instructs him to put the girl down healing her is far more important at the moment.
Ao’nung spends so much time pacing and watching his mother work and stitch the girl up that Ronal had enough and kicked him out, he grumbled and tried to stay but she was having none of it and made him leave. Once the Curtain was closed he went to find Neteyam and tell him about Lo’ak and try to make amends.
“Tell him what you told me!” Neteyam shouted forcing Ao’nung in front of Jake and Neytiri.
An hour or so bad passed Lo’ak was returned home safe and even took the blame for Ao’nung
“Why did you take the blame for me” he had asked”
“I know what it’s like to be one big disappointment” …….. “ and you helped my sister” Lo’ak had replied offering him his arm as a truce they clasped arms no more words shared between them but they both started walking towards the village together when Ronal met them
“The girl is awake I’ve just returned her to the sully family at their Mauri” she told them
Ao’nung looked in that direction about to go make sure Y/N was ok he would never doubt his mothers skill as Tsahik but he needed to see for himself he needed to see her.
Before he could even take a step in her direction his mother called to him “come Ao’nung it is late you will see her tomorrow” he did not want to risk anymore of his parents wrath tonight so he went willingly without complaint but still looked longingly in her direction. Eywa had protected his love and as he promised tomorrow he would tell her that she held his heart.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Y/N first person POV
When I awoke with the Tsahik Ronal I knew someone had come to save me but I figured it would have been my brother Neteyam he was always looking out for us younger siblings. However Ronal told me of how Ao’nung was the one to carry me to her looking distraught, he had told his mother about everything and she relayed the entire events of last night to me before returning me to my family last night. Everyone asked me questions about what happened but all I told them was that Ao’nung had realized I was gone and came to save me. My father and Neteyam were mad that I was protecting and defending him but Lo’ak and I seemed to have come to a mutual agreement that maybe just maybe Ao’nung and Rotxo weren’t that bad. It was later in the day that we all separated to complete everything we needed to get done for that day, I was able to Finnish my tasks a little early so I could go find Ao’nung I wanted to speak with him. I know he’s a free diver and a fisher so I head out to the reef on an ilu and try and find him. It took awhile but I can see him under the water not too deep so I dive. He noticed me coming and waits where he’s at for me when I finally reach him he smiles at me and signs hello. I smile and sign hello then I reach my arm out for him he thinks I’m just trying to clasp his arm in greeting but when I have his arm in mine I tug him towards me a string of bubbles escapes his mouth signaling his surprise as I wrap my arms around his neck giving him a hug, it takes him a moment but he wraps his arms around my waist hugging me back tightly. When we release each other I begin to sign to him thanking him sir saving me yesterday explaining that his mother had told me what happened when I was done he looked down sheepishly and put his hand on the back of his neck, it was very different to see him acting so shy but it was also extremely cute. After a moment of two he looks up and begins to sign “I begged our great mother Eywa to keep you safe and alive that if she did I would tell you my true feeling” I look at him confused but sign asking “ what true feelings Ao’nung?”
He looks at me for several moments before signing “I see you Y/N, and …….. and I love you” I gasp out of pure shock not even remembering we’re under water and I begin to choke. Without hesitation he grabs my arm and drags me to the surface. As soon as we break the surface I hear his warm voice “ breathe, Y/N are you ok?” I nod as I cough but my breathing stabilizes soon after and I turn to him. He swims us over to the side just a little so we’re next to a bit of the reef that has a wall like structure that breaches the water. I give him a small shy smile and move closer to him in the water wrapping my arms around him once again but this time it’s different. I look up our faces and lips only centimeters apart and whisper
“Ao’nung I see you”
Our lips meet in a frenzied kiss his large hands grip my waist roughly as he pulls me impossibly close to his body. This lasts for a solid minute before I bite his lower lip and he grunts but we don’t stop. I bit his lip again and he pulls away “stop teasing me Y/N ” he growls out in warning
I smirk “make me”
He reaches down and grabs my thigh and wraps it around his waist and at the same time kisses me again but this time he bites my lip and I gasp out a small moan. He flips me around my back pressing against the wall of coral firm but not painful. He pulls away with a groan “we need to stop” he whispers in my ear then pulls away farther.
Without any warning I hear another voice “ you two might want to stop trying to mate each other where everyone can see! Especially since Neteyam is right over there. The voice laughs out
I jump startled and pull my leg off of Ao’nungs waist his hand falling away. We turn our heads and see Rotxo about 15 feet away laughing and about 40 feet away is my older brother. After a few seconds Ao’nung and I look at eachother and break apart fully.
“Smart choice big brother is almost here he would have killed you seeing you with his little sister like that” Rotxo laughed louder after making the statement
Ao’nung game him a dirty look
“Shut up you skxawng” he barked at his friend.
——————————————————————————
Part two is out now it’s the final part
3K notes · View notes
cieloclercs · 8 months
Note
Eternal life
Oscar piastri x russian figure skater
the ice queen — oscar piastri
pairing. oscar piastri x russian figure skater!reader
face claim. alina zagitova
warnings. swearing, google translate russian (im sorry), look guys i know the winter olympics were last year but for the sake of this they’re this year ok ?? 🙏 i used pictures from oscar’s sprint podium in spa for singaore (which obviously isn’t accurate plz overlook it hehe)
author’s note. hello anon! i hope you enjoy this, sorry it took so long ❤️
requests are still open for my 1k event! send something in if you’d like <3
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yourusername swipe for a fail 🥴
view all comments…
yourfriend1 pleased to announce i got said fail on video ☺️
yourusername if you ever show that to anyone i’ll smother you in your sleep.
yourfriend1 wow 😃
yourfriend2 i feel like one of those aesthetic skater pinterest girls in the second picture
yourusername we definitely pulled off the pinterest girlie vibes 👍👍
yourcoach очень продуктивная сессия! 👍 / very productive session !
yourusername я знаю точно 😃 / i know right
username yourcoach i’m sensing some sarcasm 🤔
username no shit sherlock 🙄
username MY FAV TRIO IS BACKKKK
username girllll are you competing at the winter olympics ?? i won’t take no for an answer btw you better be there. 🔪
yourusername in that case yes !!! 😀
username olympic champion 🔜
yourusername 😉
username hold up what’s oscar doing here? 🤨
username who tf is oscar
username oscar piastri, he’s a formula 1 driver for mclaren
username and he’s lurking in MY WIFE’S likes?? get tf out of here he drives cars in circles for a living 😭😭
username can you blame him tho y/n’s this total badass skating GODDESS and he’s just a silly little aussie like ofc he’s infatuated with her 😒😒😒
username guys all he did was like her post no need to create an entire backstory out of it 😭 they’re both highly successful sportspeople so they probably just mix in the same circles from time to time 🤷‍♀️
username boo you’re ruining my fun 🙄
username МОЯ ЛЕДЯНАЯ КОРОЛЕВА 🩵 / MY ICE QUEEN
username word on the street is oscar’s liking this girlie’s post 🤔🤔 now i just have to figure out who she is 😃
username girl u can’t be serious 😭
username how do u not know who y/n is are you living under a rock
username no?? should i know who she is?? 😭
username erm YES
username i simultaneously love and hate how this oscar dude has liked ONE y/n post and suddenly all the f1 fangirls have appeared 😭 go find a hobby plz i beg you x
username jokes on you, stalking potentially new f1 wags IS our hobby
username that’s quite possibly the saddest thing i’ve ever read
username as both an f1 and a skating fan, OSCAR GIRLIES I BEG YOU PLEASE DONT DRAG Y/N INTO THIS IK HOW CRAZY Y’ALL CAN GET
username babe what are they gonna do 😭 she’s y/n y/l/n she has like universal immunity from haters lol
username you’re clearly not an f1 fan and it SHOWS 😭😭
username sweetie i’ve watched the f1 girlies single handedly DESTROY relationships do not underestimate them
username ^^ does anyone know if they’re being dramatic or not??
username long-time f1 fan here !! trust me, they’re not.
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oscarpiastri Ready to shine in Singapore 🇸🇬🤩
view all comments…
username LET’S GOOO OSCAR
username podium loading…
username i’ve got £50 riding on you getting a podium don’t let me down 💪💪
username so this is oscar piastri… 🤨
username uh oh the skater girls have arrived 😨
username *y/n girls
username no one gets into y/n’s inner circle without our approval first 🤭
username and you called US sad 😭
username how the fuck is this guy expecting to be able to pull a queen like y/n 😭😭
username seriously he looks so silly 🥴
username guys he only liked her post they probably don’t even know each other 🙄 stop making drama out of nothing jeez
username yikes someone sounds jealous…
username he looks goofy, next please 😒
yourfriend1 literally what i said smh
username PHAHAHA WHAT
username girl 😭
username i hate to break it to you oscar, the y/n girls are never going to accept you x
username yeah sorry babe, you’re just not worthy of our ice queen 😘
username the way y/n’s literally a thousand leagues above him 😔😔 the pain of being a badass bitch 🥲
username BACK OFF FROM MY WIFE Y/N YOU DONT DESERVE HER
username y’all are crazy what 😭
username imagine thinking THIS GUY stands a chance with the hottest woman alive and future olympic champion 😭😭 i’d be so embarrassed 😭
username he looks like a capybara tf
username STOP PHAHAHHA WHY DO I SEE IT
username lmao if y/n and oscar ever do end up dating he’s not going to live this down 😭
landonorris oscarpiastri since when did you become enemy number 1 to the ice skating community
oscarpiastri 🤷‍♀️
username LANDO OH MY GOD 😭
username PHAHAHHAA HE KNOWS THEY BOTH KNOW
username poor oscar getting dragged by the most intense fandom on earth 😭
yourusername 🧡
oscarpiastri 😊👑
username WOAH WOAH WOAH
username THEYRE INTERACTING OMG EVERYONE STAY CALM
username EXCUSE ME THE CROWN EMOJI?? HES ACKNOWLEDGING THE QUEEN AS HE SHOULD
username no.
username this can’t be happening
username oscarpiastri LEAVE MY WIFE ALONE BITCH 🤺🤺
username y/n you’ve just made everything so much worse 😭
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yourusername
replies:
oscarpiastri cute cap, where’d you get it?
↳ yourusername this weird australian guy gave it to me. idk i would have preferred a number 4 🤷‍♀️
↳ oscarpiastri you sure? i heard number 81’s the favourite for a podium this week 😏
↳ yourusername we’ll see 🙃
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oscarpiastri First ever F1 podium 🧡 Let’s keep them coming 😉
view all comments…
username YES OSCARRRRR
username my driver 🧡🫶
username LEGEND 🇦🇺🇦🇺🇦🇺
landonorris congrats mate! the extra motivation did you some good 😉
oscarpiastri it sure did :)
username excuse me? 🤨
username lando. what do u know.
username i bet this has something to do with y/n
username girl bffr 🙄
username LANDO I JUST WANNA TALK (tell me what u know rn.) 🔫🔫
mclaren Doing us proud 🥹🧡
*oscarpiastri liked this comment
username best rookie since hamilton button >>>
*liked by yourusername and 5,217 others
carlitosalcarazz Congratulations, amigo! 😁
oscarpiastri Thanks mate! 😊😊
username AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE
username the y/n girlies have been real quiet so far 🤨
username they’re finally realising oscar isn’t just some nobody 😭
username he might not be a nobody but one podium still doesn’t make him good enough 🥰
username y’all are psycho i swear 😭
yourfriend1 ok maybeee he’s not that bad 🙄🙄
*yourusername liked this comment
username omg the y/f/n seal of approval ??? ITS HAPPENING
username calm down nothing’s happened yet 😭 as far as we know they’re not even friends lmao let alone dating
username girl did you even see y/n’s story she was literally in the mclaren garage repping oscar’s merch 😭😭
yourusername incredible 🧡
oscarpiastri Thank you for your support today 🧡 Hope you liked the cap 😊
username wait hold on a second OSCAR GAVE HER THAT CAP???
username HES GIVING HER HIS MERCH NOW??
username oh they DEFINITELY into each other 😏
username oscar’s such a simp oh my god she turns up to one race and he’s giving her his merch 😭😭 what a dork
username i mean it’s y/n y/l/n can you blame him 🤷‍♀️
username i fear we’ve lost her y/n nation 😔
username as much as it pains me to say it i think you might be right 🥲
username i just can’t believe we’ve lost her to a guy who drives in circles for a living 🙄
username doesn’t y/n skate in circles? the shade works both ways honey 😚
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yourusername thank you for having me mclaren 🥰 and congratulations to oscarpiastri on your first f1 podium !! i had a blast 🧡🧡
view all comments…
mclaren Glad to have you on board, champ 🧡 See you again soon 😉
*yourusername liked this comment
landonorris you do know oscar’s not the only mclaren driver right 😃
yourusername the only mclaren driver with a podium this week though 🙃
oscarpiastri Thank you Y/N 😊🧡
yourusername 🫶
comments on this post have been limited.
months later…
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oscarpiastri
replies:
landonorris ice queen? 🤨
↳ oscarpiastri of course
↳ landonorris simp.
yourusername
replies:
oscarpiastri ouch ☹️
↳ yourusername just telling you what you need to hear, babe ☺️
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yourusername олимпийский чемпион! после стольких лет упорной работы я не могу поверить, что эта мечта наконец-то осуществилась 🥹 я хочу поблагодарить многих людей, которые помогли мне достичь этого: моего тренера, моих товарищей по команде, мою семью. я бы не справилась без каждого из вас! 🤍
olympic champion! after all the years of hard work, i can’t believe this dream has finally come true 🥹 there are so many people i want to thank for helping me get to this point: my coach, my teammates, my family. i couldn’t have done this without any of you! 🤍
i also want to thank my boyfriend and number one supporter oscarpiastri for putting up with me these last few months of prep 😭 i don’t know what i would have done without you 🥹 love you baby ❤️
oscarpiastri congratulations, my love 🩷 i’m so proud of you 😘
yourusername 💗💗
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jkbabiey · 1 month
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mess it up • mark lee
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wc: ~1.6K notes: cute little drabble for u guys starring my boi mark lee; all my gracie abrams stans will understand the references ;) it's angsty guys, so... yeah, enjoy!!
"hello?"
it was a little past 3 in the morning when mark was woken up by the ringing of his phone and your name on his screen. he hadn't given in on your first try, nor on the second. it was the third time you called him that night and mark was having a hard time not picking up.
but it wasn't the first time you did this. nor the second.
"hi," you said, your voice whispered and unstable.
you hadn't spoken in the past two weeks or so. not after you decided to play with mark's heartstrings for the millionth time, completely ignoring his undying feelings for you.
as if you had no idea they even existed.
mark and you had met during childhood, by chance, due to his inability to kick a soccer ball in the right direction - it ended up hitting you in the face and chucking your freshly-bought strawberry ice cream straight to the floor. he bought you a new ice cream (mixing up the flavors and buying a bubblegum-flavored ice cream instead). one year later, after you became self-proclaimed best friends, mark showed up by your window with a bucket of strawberry ice cream in his hands and a confession of his love for you in the tip of his tongue, promising to treat you right and to never get your ice cream order wrong again.
nothing ever worked out in mark's favor tho. you were awfully quick to dismiss his feelings, watching the disappointment settle in his eyes. crestfallen he walked back home and that same night, at around 1 am, without your parents knowing, you sneaked out to throw rocks at marks window, proposing to forget about that little bump and spend the night watching movies and eating strawberry ice cream. mark promptly accepted your proposal, letting you in.
that became the one topic neither you nor mark ever touched again. you never acknowledged the intense feelings mark nurtured for you every time you hung out at his or your house, and that became harder and harder for you, because if there was anything mark was awful at doing was hiding any emotion behind those eyes. his eyes never lied, especially when they settled on you and shined like he had never graced a more beautiful star.
so on your 19th birthday, you kissed him on the mouth, absolutely inebriated, after noticing the way he kept marveling at you as you swayed your hips side to side, with those big bright eyes of his. your lips were soft against his and you smiled at him after it ended, just to walk back to your group of girlfriends to keep dancing like you hadn't just kissed your best friend.
mark finally got the guts to bring it up again the day after your birthday, shyly muttering that he didn't think he had changed much from when he was 13 and in love with you. he remembers you just starring at him right in the eyes after the words left him, before your lips tentatively pecked his. right before your hands started wandering through parts of his body no one had ever touched before. right before you took his virginity and made him fall ten times harder for you.
just for you to ghost him for three whole months after it. you stopped answering his texts and calls. whenever mark tried to come to your place it was your mom opening the door and magically you were never home.
and then you called him one random night, crying, asking him to come over. he did. and just like that you were best friends again.
mark would always give you anything you asked from him, including the sudden kisses you stole from him, and the nights of pleasure in the middle of his sheets, from time to time. you took it all. and you took all that while still claiming to be his best friend and nothing more when your friends asked if you two were dating.
"i'm sorry, did i wake you up?" you asked through the phone. mark could tell you weren't home and had been crying.
"well, it is 3 am" he chuckled, trying to ease the nerves he knew were overflowing in your system. you chuckled too, muttering a small 'right'. "are you alright?"
"yeah... are you?"
"yeah."
it was silent after that. all you heard was his calm breathing and all he heard was your quick one paired with the sound of your sniffles. "can i come over?" you whimpered. mark could picture you with tearful eyes, biting down on your bottom lip to keep the cries from erupting.
you heard mark sigh. "y/n," he mumbled. "you can't keep doing this."
it had happened again. the running. it was as if a switch turned in you as soon as mark mentioned any type of love he nurtured for you. and you proved your avoidant nature once again two weeks ago when after a whole night spent in mark's bed, he let out the tiniest 'i love you' as he came inside you. it amazed him how you immediately freed yourself from his embrace after it was over, putting on your clothes in a rush and getting out of his room without saying a word or looking back at his resentful eyes for a second.
"i know mark, i just- please," you cried.
"dude, i'm serious. we've been doing this for years," you said, the anger he felt finally showing in his voice, even though he tried to sound as gentle as possible. "you can't keep giving me hope, just to freak out when i talk about the love you know i have for you. it's not like you're unaware of it. I've told you. and I'll tell you as many times as it takes for you to understand how i feel about you!"
"i know how you feel," you said, your voice wavering and mark closed his eyes at the sound burying his face in the palm of his hand. "i know, but I'm not ready to be what you want me to be. i can't do it-"
"well, you do a terrible job at showing that. you think kissing me is a good way of showing me you want nothing to do with me?"
"that's not-"
"y/n stop! if that's how you feel don't fucking call me at three in the morning asking to come over! just leave me alone."
"but i miss you," you cried, full sobs echoing through the call now. "I'm sorry. i can't stay away from you like that. you're my best friend!"
"that's not what i want to be tho!" he said, tone getting exponentially louder and he had to remind himself his parent were sleeping downstairs. "what do you not get? i want to be your boyfriend," he continued and heard your cries intensifying again. "you can't keep this up." he muttered, voice tired and heavy. "you come and go as you please, literally playing with my feelings. because you know i love you and I'll give you anything you want. you want to come over? fine. you want a kiss? okay. you want sex? I'll give it to you. I'll give you anything and you take advantage of that every fucking time. if you don't feel the same way, please, just stay away. let me get over this because if you just keep coming back i won't ever move on. you'll just keep hurting me."
by now, you could clearly hear mark's voice getting heavy with tears he was probably holding back for your sake.
"i know i never was the best to you. i'm sorry. i'm sorry i made you cry tonight. i didn't mean to," you said, sniffling in the middle of your words. "i love you."
and just like that you hung up. immediately, mark broke down in his bed. his back pressed against his mattress, his hands covering his wet eyes as his chest heaved quickly in the darkness of his room. the last thing he ever wanted was to make you feel bad about anything. he loved you with his whole body and soul and had to struggle with himself to not call you back after your quick 'i love you'. but then he would keep walking in circles and letting you walk all over him once again.
he wouldn't give in. not this time.
he fell asleep with a heavy heart and a pounding head - missing your fourth call.
'pick up dude' - y/n, 4:04 AM
'bro i was actually outside your place this whole time. can u come open the door? let's talk fr' - y/n, 4:05 AM
'pls it's freezing' - y/n, 4:05 AM
'do i have to throw rocks at your window again?' - y/n, 4:06 AM
'fine, i'll just go home then' - y/n, 4:08 AM
'i get that you're very angry at me, but I love you. i'm sorry if i fell out of line when i called you. I want to take this seriously, you'll just have to guide me through it all because I'm very very VERY scared. u know i never had a boyfriend, right? please call me when you see this. pls pls pls call me, even if you hate me and don't want to date me anymore.' - y/n, 4:27 AM
'can't lose you.' - y/n, 4:27 AM
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ugh-yoongi · 9 months
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a yoongi soft thought i have been having recently: streamer!yoongs with an also streamer reader, they both work independently but the fans know about their relationship and love it so much! i was thinking about them deciding to do a stream together where the reader does his makeup and they talk to the public, very cliche very soft lol
hope you like the idea, luv your writing ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡
omggg you have no idea how much i SQUEALED reading this message. thank u so much for sending it i am now overwhelmed with soft yoongi feels 😭
i have never actually watched a twitch stream??? so i hope i did this justice & you enjoy! <3
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stream is starting
pairing: yoongi x reader (no pronouns used) genre: est. relationship, streamer au; fluff warnings: fluff overload. reader does yoongi's nails and makeup. they kiss a lot. idk what to say they're just very in love!! i don't think i said even ONE curse word in this that's how soft it is. unedited. rating: e for everyone wordcount: 1.6k listen to: carly rae jepsen - run away with me; jungkook - seven (nightfall mix)
It starts, as most things do with Yoongi, after a night out.
He’d gone out with Hoseok. Wanted to blow off some steam after a long week for both of them. You’d sent him off with a kiss, a text me if you need a ride that was met with an affectionate roll of his eyes, and finally a have fun, love you that he returned with a smile and a kiss to your forehead.
Now, it’s nearing two a.m., and you’re in bed with a facemask on, staring down at your phone.
Yoongi had sent you a picture. It’s blurry and unfocused, clearly taken on a whim, but those are undoubtedly Hoseok’s hands. You’d know those slender fingers anywhere, but it’s the nail art that tips you off. Each finger is painted black except for his pinkies, which are decorated with smiley face stickers, sealed with an extra-shiny clear coat. Beneath the photo, two texts from your boyfriend:
Is this hard to do They’re cute
You snort, typing out a quick reply.
No, it’s not hard Why, you want me to do your nails?
You expect him to say no. Not because of some toxic masculinity bullshit, he just does too much with his hands. Chip a nail playing guitar? The acetone would be out immediately. Smudge the polish? His pout would be overwhelming.
So you’re surprised, then, when he says yes; when he sends you a few pictures he plucked off of Pinterest, accompanied only with a half-dozen question marks.
Yeah, I can do that, you send him.
Even more surprising:
Maybe on stream? We haven’t done one together yet You can finally do my makeup too
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You shouldn’t be surprised by the numbers, considering Yoongi has been hyping it up for weeks.
Kept posting teasers. Had a countdown timer on screen during his usual streams. Acted all coy and shy whenever his chat would ask him about it. Could barely swallow his smile when they demanded to know if you were finally making an appearance. Couldn’t hide the way his cheeks grew pink at all, and that tiny crumb was enough to send the internet into a frenzy.
So, no, you shouldn’t be surprised, but the view count on Yoongi’s screen seems too big to be real.
Yoongi is as shocked as you, but there’s pride simmering beneath the surface. Not once has he turned down an opportunity to show you off. Refuses to keep you hidden despite how private he insists on being otherwise. Doesn’t want you to feel like you’re a secret; wants everyone to know how much he adores you.
You’re certainly feeling adored now. “Does that say thirty thousand?”
“Sure does. Think you can perform under that kind of pressure?”
You snort. Pinch playfully at his side. Yoongi squeals, twists away from you, but he’s more serious when he comes back around. Reaches for you as he settles, hands on your hips, thumb brushing the warm skin beneath your sweatshirt. “Thanks for doing this with me,” he says, and you know Yoongi means it the same way you say I love you.
All you can do is smile, suddenly overwhelmed by how fond you are of him. How it feels like your heart grows three sizes every time he flashes you one of those gummy smiles of his own.
“Of course,” you say, because there’s only—“Five minutes. You ready?”
He pulls a face. Asks you to sit for a quick light test. Spends a few seconds fussing over it even though you think it looks fine. Makes sure all your supplies are organized and at the ready—you decided to let Yoongi’s stream decide all the colors and stickers, so there’s stuff everywhere, and you can see how stressed he is.
So you reach out, smooth over the furrow between his brows. “Relax, baby.”
He huffs. “I’m trying, it’s just—”
“You’ve done this a million times.”
“Yeah, by myself. Not with you. Not in front of… Jesus, there’s even more of them now.”
You roll your lips to hide the smile that’s creeping up. “C’mere,” you say, sliding your fingers through his belt loops. “Everything is going to be fine, okay? This is just for fun. Deep breaths.”
Yoongi listens. Closes his eyes, sucks in a breath. Holds it for a few seconds before he exhales, and it probably doesn’t do anything to dampen the buzz, but at least he looks glued back together. “I know.” Another inhale, another slow exhale. “I just want this to go well.”
“It will.”
He looks like he wants to argue. Push back on it. But Yoongi knows you just like you know him, and he trusts you implicitly. He wants to argue. Instead, he says, “Okay,” presses a soft kiss to your lips, and that’s the end of that.
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“What color did they decide on?”
Admittedly, you might’ve gone overboard. Surely you didn’t need to bring over every eyeshadow palette you own, but you wanted options, and now those options are coming back to bite you in the rear. There are too many.
Yoongi huffs. “I don’t know. I can’t scroll through the chat because you made me put my hands in this ridiculous thing.”
“It’s a UV lamp. You don’t want your nails to chip, do you? After I just spent all that time and effort—”
“Okay, okay,” Yoongi relents, and a familiar blush creeps up his neck. Over his shoulder, you can see his chat explode with messages. “You see what I have to put up with?” he asks them.
“Yeah, it’s awful,” you agree, leaning in closer to the monitor. “Hi, guys. What color eye makeup should we do?” The chat erupts again. Messages come in faster than you can keep up with. “Wow, there are a lot of you. Of course I’m going to do eyeliner. Oh—I’m seeing a lot of requests for purple. That okay with you, babe?”
“Sure. Give the people what they want.”
With a smile, you pat his cheek with a gentle hand, cooing at him. “So accommodating. Isn’t he the best, chat?” Yoongi rolls his eyes, blush deepening. You think he’d hide behind his hands if they weren’t still drying. “Okay, nails are all done. Want to show them how they turned out?”
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Like most things with Yoongi are, it’s easy.
He sits patiently while you prime his skin, commenting on how nice it is, and he makes small talk with his chat. Tells them how the two of you met, how disastrous your first date had been, how Yoongi thought he’d blown it for good. He’s told all of these stories before, but it still warms your heart to hear them again—to hear the way he speaks each word with such care, such affection.
“Show them how beautiful you look with your eye makeup done.”
He rolls his eyes, but does as you request anyway. Once again, the chat explodes, and the amount of emotes whirring by nearly makes you go crosseyed. COUPLE GOALS!!!! stands out amongst the chaos, and you know Yoongi has read it because another slow, gummy smile takes over his face.
You do his foundation next even though he doesn’t need any. Even though the chat demands he drop his skincare routine and he admits he doesn’t have one. “It is so unfair that you have this skin and can barely remember to moisturize.” You pretend to boo him. “God truly has favorites.”
“Yeah, you,” Yoongi says, and it’s so quick, so automatic, that it catches you off guard. Has you spraying the setting spray before you can tell him to close his eyes. “Aish, what was that—”
“Sorry!”
“I’m blind,” he wails. “You’ve blinded me!”
“I did not—”
But you’re up and off anyway, disappearing into the bathroom for a wet washcloth. You can hear Yoongi’s raspy laughter from the hall, know he’s not grievously injured and is just playing it up for laughs, and you don’t mind. Loving Yoongi means seeing all of his parts, and you know he’s got a darkness in him just like everyone else, that sometimes he finds it hard to escape it, so you want him to be this carefree and joyous always. Want to hear that laughter all the time.
You’re hovering in the doorway when he says, “Do you think this is what they meant when they said love is blind?”
And you’re… struck. You can feel how much Yoongi loves you in everything he does; can hear it in every word he says whenever he speaks about you. He handpicks each one, wraps it in the care it deserves. Not because they’re fragile, but because he wants to, and that kind of love feels a little overwhelming. Has you blinking back tears.
You’re not going to cry on stream, so you take a second to get yourself together before you walk back in the room. Say, “Are you done being dramatic yet?” because it’s easier to joke, and Yoongi shoots you a smile that says he knows.
“Of course,” he answers. “Please continue. The chat is patiently waiting to see the final product.”
You make a show of looking over his shoulder again, at pretending to read all the comments. You press a kiss to his temple just because you’re there. “Oh, they are, are they?”
One catches your eye: is anyone else painfully aware of how single they are rn.
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kiri-tatsu · 10 months
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From something to nothing
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Weeks had passed since he last seen you, and he just can't take it anymore. You're his love, his darling, his; he wants you back already.
well i can't be predicable and just say everyone gets a bad/good ending, so it's going to be mixed
@swivy123 did part 2 and tagged u like u asked <3
pt. 1
cw/tw- angst (ofc), hurt/comfort, hurt no comfort, reader dies in one of them (lmao srry babes), gn! reader
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Alhaitham
To love was simply a confusing emotion to Alhaitham. He never felt the need to be in a relationship or to see the reason to ever form one. But you, came into his life and made his see what it was like to loved and cared for. He didn't have the luxury of such after his grandmother passed away, and he never knew the feeling of such an emotion as it slipped through his fingers.
And the day he blew up on you, you wouldn't come around until he, himself, went out of his way to apologize. You didn't like confrontation, you didn't like be upfront with your emotions, and he knew you, maybe even better than you did.
So why? Why was it the first time he's seen you in weeks, his heart his heavy with guilt as you were wrapped in the arms of his blond roommate?
The two of you were in Lambad's Tavern, he thought he was just here to pick up his roommate again. But instead you were here also and you looked as bad as Kaveh, well in the sense of you two being drunk.
Your eyes were a bit puffy, and you had small tears rolling down your cheeks as Kaveh had you in his arms.
And when he made his way over to you, you looked up and began to cry even more. His lips in a frown as he pulled you up and into his arms.
Your hands formed fists as they began to pound against his chest, but his arms still held you as you threw your little tantrum. One arm wrapped around your waist, the other soothingly running through your hair.
Kaveh watched with a little smile of relief on his face, as he swirled his glass of wine before taking a sip. Well, at least the two of you looked as if you'd be okay.
At least Kaveh didn't have to hear you talk about how much you missed Alhaitham anymore or see how brooding his roommate could actually be.
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Diluc
Once again, he had come home from being the Darknight Hero again, and he just couldn't take it anymore not seeing his lovely partner in bed waiting for him.
Swallowing up his pride, the next day he entered through the tall gates of Mondstadt and made his way over to Cat's Tail ignoring how Diona was by the door and looked as if she wanted to scratch his eyes out.
Entering the establishment, he straightened his clothes as he looked to see a surprised Margret behind the counter with Prince. "Master Diluc, what brings you here? TCG I'm assuming?"
Yelling could be heard as a little crowd was forming around a table and his eyes glanced over, and for some reason he thought he seen some hair that looked familiar.
Cheering was heard all around as he heard a loud 'yes!' being shouted by what he could assume was the winner as everyone parted leaving him speechless.
"Them... I'm here for them," he mumbled as he felt his legs move on his own making long strides over towards you. You were surprised to hear the breathlessness call of your name as you turned and was quickly pulled into his embrace as a kiss was placed on your lips.
Surprised you pulled away as his gloved hands cupped your cheeks, "I'm sorry [Name], i love you so much." His crimson eyes stared down into your that were skeptical of him
The whispers around you made you turn to the crowd that were were watching wide eyed and murmuring. "God damn it Diluc..."
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Kaeya
You and Kaeya were different; like night and day, the sun and the moon, snow and shine. You were bubbly, loving, and were too nice for your own good; he was flirty, sly, and had was around everything.
After you little 'fight' you left your shared home, and returned the next morning after going to Lisa's home and crying to her about what had Kaeya said and did.
Opening the door with your key, you entered your home to see Kaeya asleep on the couch, where he was actually asleep or just faking it you didn't want to stick around to find out.
As quietly as you could, you began to pick up your papers from the floor, Kaeya's words from last night ringing in your ear as you began to fight the tears brimming your eyes.
Little sniffles and hiccups escaped your mouth as you began to gran your papers, looking over at some of the poetry you wrote dedicated to your loving... well, used to be loving boyfriend.
Making a stack of all the papers that were dedicated to the calvary captain you placed them on the table you worked on and picked up the rest that weren't dedicated to him.
"[Name]...?" His head peaked from over the couch as he stood up and walked over to you, only for you to take a few steps back. "What's worng? Why are all your papers on the floor?"
Does he seriously not know? You inhaled sharply, as you went to your shared bedroom, him following behind. "Kaeya... I can't keep doing this. You keep getting drunk and you never remember anything. You seem to lash out on me and I just can't take it anymore!"
His bit his lip as he rubbed the back of his neck and shift his wieght to his other leg, "Come on [Name], I'm sure-" You turned around, and his eye widen at the tears pouring from your eyes.
"No! I don't- I can't," letting out a groan of frustration you wiped your eyes and pushed passed him. "I'll come get my things some other time. Bye Kaeya."
Once again you left him in a cold empty house, and this time, you weren't going to come back to him, in his arms ever again.
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Albedo
Time is such a fleeting thing really, and no one had enough of it. Well, mortals never had enough time, ever.
It started with weeks going by since you last seen Albedo, you felt a bit guilty for how you kicked him out from your home but what he said deeply hurt you. So, with a determined mind and a aching heart you gathered up some supply and got ready for a hike up Dragonspine.
The cold nipped at your nose and cheeks as your boots crunched the snow beneath you with every step you took. No one liked coming to Dragonspine be it commissions, food, or resources. The place was filled with monsters and the Fatui, so it was reasonable.
Hiking up to where Albedo's lab was, it was damn tiering. Pulling your jacket closer to you, there was a loud boom from behind you, which made you turn your head unaware of what was in front of you.
Apparently a Frostarm Lawachurl woke up from it slumber and it locked onto you, before it charges towards you, the loudness made you turn as you were then thrown off the side of the mountain. What a terrible day to forget your wind glider.
And then days passed since you were last heard of, Albedo believed that you were still locked up in your home ignoring him anytime he went by your home.
It wasn't until Aether and Paimon ran up to him a week later, "ALBEDO!" Paimon screamed as the two ran towards him when he was as the alchemy crafting table with Timaeus.
"Traveler, Paimon what-" Paimon was sobbing as she was holding onto Aether as he was trying catch his breath. He held a necklace to the alchemist, who was confused until he looked at the pendent.
Yours, it's yours. His heart dropped as he clutched it into his hand, "[Name]? A-Are they safe?" He looked over to Paimon who was sobbing as she was behind coddles by Aether. "Where are they...?"
"We were in Dragonspine, and there was an avalanche, I fell but I had my wind glider. We looked down to see that there something down by your lab... They were buried underneath the snow... I'm sorry Albedo."
Albedo closed his eyes as he nodded his head as he took your necklace holding it close to his chest. "Thank you... I-I have to go now..."
He never got to apologize to you, now how will he live knowing that his last words to you were hurtful?
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Xiao
The conqueror of demons, the last remaining yaksha, Atalus, and Xiao; he was one by many names, many titles. He didn't necessarily dislike humans, mortals, he just didn't want to get attached only for their life to end abruptly.
His karma debt already affects the monsters around him, and he doesn't need it to affect someone he cares deeply for. So, when push comes to shove, in order to protect the people of Liyue, he is willing to strain his own relationship in order to protect the mortals, even if his love is also a mortal.
I would rather sacrifice you in order to keep the people of Liyue safe, how could anyone you love ever say that to you face? He didn't even look at you when he said those words either, that's what probably made it hurt even more.
Days, weeks, months, and Xiao hasn't heard from you, nor has he seen yo, he would be lying if he said he wasn't worried for you. At night he could barely hear the small whispers of his name from you and he would be by your side in a second.
But when he arrives, you're asleep with your face contorted into one of pain as you toss and turn in bed. With a heavy heart, he sits on the edge of the bed, and leans down pressing a kiss agaisnt your forehead.
This is the last time, I will let you go so you can be with another mortal who pays attention to you. I love you [Name], and before you wake up from your nightmare, he's gone in a wisp of teal and black.
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if anyone wants to be tagged in up coming works of mine just ask <3
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slvthrs · 7 months
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SWEET REVENGE AND GUITAR STRINGS | vinnie hacker
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--- MINORS PLEASE FUCK OFF FOR UR OWN GOOD ---
your ex-boyfriend decided to cheat on you- the sane course of action was sleeping with his enemy
ROCKSTAR!VINNIE X FEM!READER
WARNINGS: NSFW CONTENT MINORS DNI, praise n degradation kink, unprotected sex (use birth control idiots), dressing room sex, slight violence and blood, blood kink if u squint
word count: 2.2k <3
Wrath.
Not even anger or rage- it was pure fucking red wrath. Your boyfriend of 2 years was cheating on you. He had the fucking audacity to cheat on you, and try to hide it. 
God did you want to kill him.
Your bestfriend Elle had sent you a video of him making out with some rando chick at a party and then taking her into a room to obviously have sex. You weren’t even sad, you just wanted to hurt him.
It was 3 days after you found out your boyfriend was cheating on you and the wrath hadn’t gone away. You’ve been ignoring every text, every message, every call- he was going to be so pissed. You were doing a pretty good job of not running into him but today he had a gig and you would have to end up going.
You and Elle were sitting on your bed in your underwear and bra eating a huge assortment of candy and snacks while re-watching Sex Education. 
“Wait have you confronted Theo about cheating on you yet” Elle asked with a lollipop between her lips
You groaned you wanted to but every time you thought about it all you could do was want to punch him “I wanted to trust me but I just wanna hurt him y’know I don’t need his half-assed apology”
“Wait so why don’t you just ditch his gig” Elle inquired
“I would but imagine your girlfriend just ditches you with an explanation because remember he doesn’t know I know he cheated on me” You threw your head back- it was gonna be really hard to get him back
“Hmm does he have like y’know enemies that you can y’know… fuck” Elle suggested
“Elle we’re not in a wattpad fan-fic, Theo doesn’t have enemies per say” You rolled your eyes… but he did have someone who pissed him off to no end
You shot up with a plan in mind, “But he does have someone he kinda hates” You said while you carding through your closet trying to find an outfit
“Oooh who” Elle sat up like a curious dog 
“Vinnie” The name was met with a huff from Elle
Vincent Cole Hacker, lead guitarist and singer of his band and adored by girls all over the country.
His killer style mixed with his rough hair and piercings accompanied with the rings he adorned on each hand which trailed across his guitar with so much purpose you couldn’t help but think what else they could do.
The same Vinnie Theo hated, and the same Vinnie who could never take his eyes off you.
“Babe you're super hot but I’ve legit never seen Vinnie without his army of girls following him, are you sure he’s the one?” Elle probes and she's right Vinnie’s a chick magnet, you’d be lucky to find him alone, but Elle was also right about the fact you were hot, the way your hair sat, framing your face and the way you would bite your fingers, and look up at guys, batting your eyelashes and giggling- toying with their feelings- you had boys begging for you.
But Vinnie was the one you wanted.
“I know, I know, but I have a plan trust me” 
You didn’t have a plan 
All you knew was that Vinnie stared at you for far too long to be considered platonic, and no sane guy would give up a chance to hook up with you.
After about 2 hours, you and Elle were ready. She was wearing a denim skirt with a pink tank top and pink converse adorned with little accessories, while you were wearing a black cropped top with Dominic Fike embroidered on without a bra so you could see your nipples poking through the fabric. Paired with a black mini-skirt and pantyhose which looked like it was attacked by an army of cats and a pair of platforms with some other accessories here and there- you looked enchanting.
The pair of you got there around 30 minutes later and broke off, with Elle waking to the bar to get some drinks and you trying to find your cheating ass boyfriend. 
The bass of all the people walking around made you want to turn on your heel and walk away. You had endured it for the sake of your boyfriend but now the air was filled with venom rather than admiration.
“There she is, hi baby” It sounded so goddamn awful coming from your boyfriends mouth but you had to play the part of the oblivious girlfriend for a little longer
“Hi Theo” You say with the only respect you have for him left and kiss his cheek
As he continues his conversation with his bandmates you zone out and look around while drinking some fruity drink his bandmates gave you. As you looked around you caught the addictive eyes of your target, Vinnie, and unsurprisingly he was checking you out, who wouldn't tbh.
As your staring competition played out you were quickly brought back to reality by your boyfriend telling you they were about to go on stage.
“Hey babe can I talk to you for a sec?” You asked and he went along with it, presumably thinking he was about to get some last minute action.
“Yeah baby, what do you want?” He asked, so fucking oblivious to what was about to happen.
“Who the fuck is this chick your making out with in this video” You said while playing out the video on your phone.
His mouth hung agape, this cunt thought he could have the audacity to be shocked.
“B-babe I don’t know what that is, I-I’m pretty sure I was like sure drunk” Seriously, the ‘I was drunk’ excuse? 
He can do better than that.
“Are you fucking serious, I’ve been drunk plenty of times and I’ve never fucking cheated on you” Every gross and terrible emotion was bubbling up from inside you as you were about to overflow
“I-it doesn’t even matter I just kissed her your fucking overreacting!” Overreacting, this fucking bitch thinks I’m over reacting
With gritted teeth you said “Oh I’m overreacting? I’m fucking overreacting, well you wanna see overreacting?” 
You didn’t even register what your body was doing before,
SNAP!
Fuck, your hand made contact with his face and there was a stream of red trickling down his nose while your knuckles were bruising up.
“YOU FUCKING BITCH” He yelled pushing you up against the wall, while his blood spilled on to your chest
On any other day you wouldn’t have been able to push him off but with the immense amount of rage mixed with adrenaline you were feeling you pushed him to the ground, with your head spinning you ran off into another room trying to catch your breath.
As you finally stood up from your hunched over position and walked over to the mirror in the room- shit my shirt has blood on it, I look like I killed someone
You try to get some tissues to take the blood off but it’s no use the blood is congealed and staining your white shirt so you grab a closed water bottle and try to figure out what dressing room you're in.
You hand slides across a red leather couch with stains and find a stack of polaroids.
As you shuffled through them you see a drummer and bassists clearly drunk and passed out on a sofa, in another one you can see a brunette making a face and flipping off the camera, and in the final one its a group photo 4 boys playing a song in front of a smaller audience- in the photo you spot a particular face- Vinnie.
And as fate has been so kind the tall blonde walks into the room as if on cue, “Oh shit, what are you doing here?”
But before you you can answer his eyes widen and he walks towards you, “Fuck are you okay” He says with knitted eyebrows as his hand hesitantly swiping the blood of your shirt.
“Yeah, it's not my blood” You say with a smile as you try to reassure him, but which only leads him to look at you, even wider eyed.
“It’s Theo’s” You continue as you sit down on the red sofa, “He kinda cheated on me so y’know he deserved it”
You play with your hands in your lap as you look up at Vinnie who's now sitting next to you with an unreadable expression.
“Well he fucking deserved it then” He says breaking the silence as you look up to meet his gaze, “If you we’re my girl, I’d cut my balls of before cheating on you”
You let out an obnoxious laugh while he follows you, “I’m serious though I would never do that, your to fucking hot for that.”
“Yeah yeah” You breathe out as you tip your head back on the sofa as you let Vinnie’s eyes rake over your body, huffing your chest so your tits press against your shirt, watching how he bites his lips.
“So any plans now that you're single” He was obviously trying to hint at you, so you played along.
“I dunno Vinnie, do you have any ideas for me?” You said sliding across the sofa, closer to the blonde boy
He hands trail over the blood on your shirt, staining his fingers and dragging his hand onto your jawline pulling your face up to his, so close but so fucking far, “I have a few ideas”
“Yeah”, You breathe out, “Show me”
Both of your lips interlock at a slow pace at first until he pulls your face away from him to breathe but his gaze drops to your spit covered lips and flushed out look before he smashes them up together for the second time and pulls you onto straddle his lap.
“God every fucking time I saw you with that prick I wanted to kill myself.” He confessed, letting his hands graze up your sides pulling your top off.
All you do in response is giggle whilst you tip your head back so he can lay a trail of saccharine sweet kisses from the base of your neck down to your tits. Your hands scratch his shoulders, bawling his shirt in your first hoping he’ll take it off.
And if Gods looking out for you, he pulls his shirt of ruffling if his hair and goes back to attack your chest with love bites, your hands reach to the back of his head grabbing a tuft of his hair as you throw your head back and moan as his teeth catch your nipples in his mouth.
“Vinnie, fuck oh my god” You moaned out, his hands moved to flip up your skirt and fondling your ass while you grind down on his hardened dick, then he takes shuffles around with his belt pulling it of and tossing it on the ground keeping you too connected with the bloody kisses falling from your lips on to his tan skin.
“Whenever he kissed you, touched you, my skin felt like it was on fucking fire,” He pulls of his pants with one swift motion as they fall to the ground with a light, airy thud, “He doesn’t fucking deserve you, your too hot for him,” 
You pull off of him to stare into his eyes, “Vinnie, I adore you, but if you bring up my ex one more damn time while we're about to have sex I’m getting up and leaving” You say will as emotionless of a face you can pull.
He airs out a breathy laugh but rather than replying he flips the two of you over onto the sofa and rips your skirt of, “Yes ma’am,” He starts, “But we both know your not leaving to go anywhere” 
He looks for a condom but I stop him, “I’m on birth control and your clean, don’t worry”, you say with the most poise you can muster whilst your under a 6 foot man
With his new found confidence, he lines up your entrance with his dick, carefully sliding in, going gently through your folds whilst you arch into the motion gasping out for him,
As your hands hook around his head to pull both of you into a kiss, he sets a ruthless pace, pounding into you like his life depends on it but not letting you relish a single moment of freedom.
He doesn’t stop for a second, not letting you rest whilst the entire room echos with sounds of skin slapping and it doesn’t stop, turning the melody of your skins coming in contact and the rhythm of your synched breathless moans turns the room into a orchestra of pleasure and carnal desire as both of you chase your release.
And it’s not far, you cum first with a loud moan and arching your back with your mouth in an ‘O’ shape and he’s not far behind cumming in you and dropping down on to you to place more hickeys all over you and claim you even more as his.
They say revenge is an act of passion, and while you're laying there, breath panting, legs sore and your ex-boyfriends biggest rival laying on top of you rubbing circles into your skin… you can’t help but think they're right, because what’s a bigger act of passion than sex? And what’s a bigger form of revenge than betrayal? And the best betrayal is the sight of your ex-boyfriend watching you limp out of a dressing room with your hair and makeup messed up whilst his rival follows behind you in an even worse state.
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strongheartneteyam · 11 months
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Realize where you belong.
Pairing: neteyam sully x female!human!reader/female!dreamwalker!reader
Chapter 3
CW: angst, reader is a loner, reader works her ass off every day at the lab, fluff, neteyam being cute towards reader (even tho it still has weird vibes lol), mad jealous neteyam, TRIGGER WARNING for depression symptoms (such as being moody n having less appetite than the usual), stalking, obsessive and toxic behavior, also TRIGGER WARNING for reader mentioning the word “suicidal” in an internal monologue (she IS NOT actually suicidal, she just feels really sad and mentions the word. if u read it, you'll know what I mean)
Not proofread. I'll do it as soon as I can ♡ I hope it's a good chapter 🥲 & thank u to everyone who's reading this fanfic, who left a comment in the last chapter and, of course, to everyone who asked to be in the taglist I LOVE Y'ALL 😘💕💕💕
Chapter 2
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷
Mother looking at me
Tell me, what do you see?
Yes, I've lost my mind
(...)
Will I ever be free?
Have I crossed the line?
All the things she said, running through my head
All the things she said (t.A.T.u)
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷
You woke up feeling like crap that morning.
Your last shift had been so demanding. You had to cook just so much food that you started to wonder if there was anything left in the pantry. You had gone into that room just so many times yesterday to get ingredients and kitchen utensils, your legs felt heavy and sore now, as you stretched them in your small bed.
There were just too many people to eat in that damn laboratory.
Meanwhile you, the cook, barely had any time left to eat. There was always just so much work to do. So many dishes to wash, so many vegetables and meat to cut, bread to prepare from scratch... Your head hurt just thinking about it.
You felt so stressed out that you preferred to unwind a little instead of eating, sometimes. You would find a quiet place, sit somewhere, put your headphones on and press play on one of your many curated playlists or in one of your favorite songs. Listening to music seemed to work like a medicine to your wounds and, going to the cafeteria and having to socialize, to have people all around you felt too much, so, you just tried to avoid it. You even started to lose a little weight because of it. Nothing too much, though. You were only slightly thinner than you used to be. But in the back of your head, there was always a voice saying "Please, take better care of yourself...". Despite knowing that voice was right, you were too tired and apathetic to care.
Ever since you started to Dreamwalk, it was like your whole world had changed. That old life you led did not seem to be enough anymore. It never was, in the first place. It could never compare to the heightened senses you had when you were in your Avatar, helping you smell and hear everything better.
The first time you spent a whole afternoon running alone through the Pandoran forest next to Hell's Gate, you felt alive like you had not felt in years.
But nothing gold can ever stay. Way sooner than you expected, you had to be awakened from that magical dream. Everytime you came out of the technological machine you had to lay inside of to be able to drive your Avatar, you thought "Damn! Why wasn't I born a na'vi? They're so freaking lucky to have such an incredibly beautiful Planet to call their own. If only Earth was still as beautiful as it used to be..."
When you were not in one of your free days, you would always work until you felt exhausted and fed up with everything. It was not a walk in the park to be a cook. Even though you loved cooking since you were a teenager, when you used to always mix different ingredients and spices and create new recipes, this profession forced you to spend most of your time standing up and to have little time to sit and rest your poor fatigued legs. In some days, all you wanted was to sleep for 12 hours straight. And God knows you were capable of actually doing that.
Not a long time ago, you slept so much that, when you eventually woke up, it was 2 pm and you almost got fired from the lab when you finally showed up at the kitchen you were supposed to be in since 6 am.
You promised yourself you would never do that again. You just could not afford to lose that job. And you wanted to cry just thinking about not being able to Dreamwalk anymore. Exploring Pandora was the peak of your life, currently. It was when you felt high as a kite. As funny as it sounded, it was true. You felt euphoria run through your body everytime you got to have blue skin and be over 8 feet tall.
You liked to cook and was good at it, but, you were a smart, intelligent girl who knew much more than people thought you did. Unfortunately, you could not manage to get a higher position at the lab. Your forte was not sciencey stuff. It was subjects like Human History, Languages, Philosophy... At best, you got to use your language learning skills to learn basic na'vi fast and was able to get an Avatar from the lab. At least that was a good thing that your tiring job provided you. God knows that privilege was one of the few things keeping you alive. You goddamn hated you life, your job, everything... All your days seemed to be the same. Same chores, same annoying people... Most scientists did not try to hide that they did not see you as an equal. Even though they were always really polite to you, they would not let you in in their little groups, in their upbeat conversations through the laboratory corridors. You could count in one hand how many of them used to talk to you with genuine interest in hearing what you had to say.
You sat every day next to the less valued lab employees: janitors, cleaning ladies, other cooks just like you and so on. Your race had never been good at realizing the worth that these hardworking people had, anyway. Why would they do it now? You thought it to be so sad...
Those employees were nice regular people. Even thought some of them were idiots and treated you badly, there are people who behave like that anywhere. You were thankful that most of them were polite to you and treated you well enough. You also had a close friendship with one of the female employees, a cute, humble and really kind girl called Crystal. But she was your only actual friend. You did not remember the last time you had made an actual effort to make a friend, to be nice to someone in hopes you could get to know them better and they could become a part of your life. You had to admit you had been really grumpy lately.
You could easily blame such moodiness on your lack of will to keep living that life you currently had. It’s not that you were suicidal, it's just that you wished you could live a better life.
There was also Derek, the tall, cute boy you would make out with every now and then. You did not have a proper name for your relationship with him. He was always lovely towards you and you two would have really interesting conversations together and sneak around to kiss each other and do other types of heated stuff (though you never had sex with him) anytime you both felt like it. But it did not happen that often, anyway. You did not put much thought into it, to be honest. Derek was just a friend you would fool around with. You could not be farther from being in love with him or anything of sorts.
After another tiresome day, you walked fast towards your room. All you could think about was how nice and cozy your bed would feel when you would lay your body on it. Only five minutes after you finally laid down, you fell asleep. Slumber had been bugging you all day. Lately, it had always been like that.
They say you have to be careful what you wish for. That your words and thoughts have power over what happens to you. And you learned it the hard way.
In one of your infamous busy but boring afternoons, something unexpected happened to you.
Seemingly out of nowhere, a na'vi young man appeared outside of your glass window and tapped slightly on it. You almost choked on your own saliva when you saw that huge, blue creature staring at you with wide yellow eyes. A scream got stuck right in the middle of your throat, since you got so startled you could not get your vocal chords to obey the command your brain was sending them. What the hell was that na'vi doing in front of the laboratory? They did not use to come to Hell's Gate. And why was he looking at you through the kitchen window?
The na'vi boy just would not stop staring at you. His gaze was so intense it made you feel unbelievably uncomfortable. Suddenly, he pointed to the left. The big, ample door that led to the open area in front of the room you worked in was right at the same direction his four fingered hand was pointing to. You realized he was signaling to you that he wanted to see you outside of the lab.
You started to say, in your own mind: "What kind of weird situation is this?"
"Please?" You heard the alien plead in fluent English (he only had a typical na'vi accent), his voice coming through the narrow gap that existed between the glass and the window frame. His eyes reminded you of the eyes of a small kitten asking for food.
You got surprised by the fact that he was able to speak English. You wondered why he had learned it and who taught him the language.
You tried to reach for the door to try and inform someone that there was a na'vi around and ask if anybody knew who he was when you heard the alien say:
"Don't go, please! I just want to talk to you! I'm not gonna hurt you."
Your back was turned to him. When you turned around, he was smiling.
"It's incredible how you're even prettier up close."
"I'm sorry?!" You answered
"Oh, forgive me. My name is Neteyam. Neteyam te Suli Tsyeyk'itan. It's really nice to meet you." He was still smiling.
That name was familiar, Neteyam te Suli... Oh, of course! Neteyam was the son of the Olo'eyktan of the Omatikaya clan, Jake Sully. He was very famous between the na'vi and the humans.
Neteyam Suli was one of the most feared na'vi warriors out there. A great archer and very skilled with the knives the Omatikayas made themselves, he fought fearlessly against the recoms, including Colonel Miles Quaritch, an old enemy of his father. Quaritch used to lead the RDA soldiers when he was human, before being "revived" and given an Avatar body. He died in battle against the na'vi. But that did not mean that there was finally peace between humans and the na'vi race.
But why in hell was Neteyam Suli trying to talk to you? It is not like the na'vi liked the humans. On the contrary, they despised your race.
"Uhmm... okay. Nice to meet you..." You tried to be polite and peaceful towards the na'vi boy, like you were advised to be by your teachers, back when you were studying and training to get your Avatar "But I'm sorry, what did you say? That I'm prettier up close?" Your brows were furrowing, your face full of confusion. Despite all, you were calmer now that you knew you could communicate with him in English. Your na'vi was not the best out there.
"Yes." Neteyam's big amber eyes shone when he looked at your face. You were beyond dazed. "I've seen you before. Many times actually. But only from far away. It doesn't compare to seeing you right next to me." His voice had a weird warm feeling in it, like he was already acquainted to you. But how could it be? You did not even know who he was before he revealed his identity to you.
"When did you see me...?" Your mouth was slightly opened, so bewildered you felt
"Don't you wanna come outside so we can talk better?" He said, seeming excited.
"Unfortunately, no. I'm good, thanks." Neteyam looked sad after you declined his offer.
"Why not? I told you, I'm not gonna hurt you. I promise." He smiled faintly. You could tell he was hurt by your blunt answer.
It pained you to act like that towards him. You admired the na'vi so much. Damn, you even would choose to be born a na'vi if you somehow could go back in time, before you were inside your mother's womb and you could talk to Eywa herself. But how were you gonna trust him? There were some na'vi out there, his mother, for example, that hated humans with such a boiling passion. What if he took after his mother? You would be in trouble if he tried to kill you. Even though the na'vi were a peaceful by nature race, everyone has a limit, so, you had to be careful when interacting with them. You learned about all the genocide your kind had committed against his kind while simultaneously destroying his Planet slowly, in a cruel, despicable way. You honestly understood the contempt the na'vi felt when it came to humans.
You looked at Neteyam with honesty in your eyes and said:
"Please don't take this the wrong way but I can't really trust you. I know you told me you're not gonna hurt me, but, I'm still human. How can I know you trust me, to begin with?"
"I trust you because you're different. You're nothing like the others from your kind. You're more like my people. And I love that about you." Neteyam said, smiling at you.
"Can you please just tell me how do you know me? Because I've never seen you before. I've only heard about you because you're the Olo'eyktan's eldest son and Olo'eyktan to be. But you talk to me like you somehow... know me. I'm really confused, Neteyam." He felt his heart race when he heard you pronounce his name. Your voice sounded so sweet to his sensitive na'vi ears, making him move them somewhat to the sides. It was the same voice he heard in the forest, when he watched you talk to yourself saying how beautiful you thought some yellow, bioluminescent flower that you saw in the grass was.
"You're a Dreamwalker. I've seen you around. I love how much you seem to appreciate and respect my Planet instead of destroying it like the others from your kind do. That's why I think you're more na'vi than human." He chuckled happily and you got confused by his last sentence.
You had to admit he looked cute when his fangs escaped from under his upper lip whenever he smiled or chuckled. But you felt so weird thinking that.
"I'm more na'vi than human?" You were intrigued "What do you mean?" You laughed a bit and he continued on staring at you in an intense manner.
Neteyam heard footsteps approaching, so, he started to move just so he could hide. He did not want any other human but you seeing him. He knew he could not trust them as he could trust you.
"Wait! Where are you -" before you could finish your words, he was already gone.
The brown wooden door behind you opened and Derek appeared carrying a pile of plates in his arms.
"Hey, cutie." He walked towards the sink, leaving the dirty dishes there to be washed by himself when he would be back in the kitchen.
"Hi, Derek." You smiled faintly. You were still recovering from that odd interaction you had with Neteyam Sully.
Derek came close to your ear and whispered:
"Feel like meeting me tonight? I miss you." You sighed
"I don't know... I'm not really in the mood, sorry." You answered, uninterested
He got a little surprised by your answer and moved his eyebrows up, making wrinkles appear in his forehead but quickly remembered he had much work to do outside, so, he walked towards the door and got out of the room without saying another word to you.
Neteyam was still out there, next to the window, leaning against the wall. He was listening to the conversation the whole time. He had to use all the self control he learned to have with the years to not hiss when he heard that human call you "cutie" and ask if you wanted to meet him tonight. Who was he, anyway? And why was he saying he missed you? Neteyam had never seen you show any sign that he was your mate before. He had to find out what was going on. Neteyam would not let anyone get between the both of you. It would not be a weak human male that would be the obstacle that would make him give up on his future mate. He was used to challenges and was not afraid of another one. That would probably even be fun. Neteyam could imagine that tiny mate of yours shivering in fear when he showed him his big, sharp fangs.
Neteyam decided he was gonna find out who the hell that mate of yours was. He was sure he was not better than him. That human male would never be as strong as he was. That human would never be able to hunt fresh food for you, walking through the forests of Pandora and confronting big, dangerous animals, like Neteyam would. He knew he outbraved that human. He could never be a good mate to you like Neteyam could be. You deserved better than him.
༊⁀➷
Taglist:
@xylianasblog @samistars @crazy4books1 @nerdybouquetofkittens-blog @explosiongamora @lik0 @your-girl-mj @darktyrantwinner @xxunnie @sereisstuff @yeosxxx @die4niyahhh @henhouse-horrors @lala-1516 @iman-lu @manumanulau @im-in-a-pansexual-panik @hana-yuri
I tagged some of you that did not ask to be tagged but left really cute comments on the last chapter that made my heart feel warm 💓 if u don't wanna be tagged, just lemme know
Also, if someone wants to be added to the taglist too just leave a comment below saying that 🤍
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lixern · 8 months
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ONE ON THE BACK- NOTHA' ONE ON THE FRONT!
` think i need someone older . . . jingren x gn!reader <-
xx. tags; poly┊jing yuan┊blade┊jingren┊all of u are in an rs┊blade punishes u┊threesome┊oral┊edging┊overstimulation┊degradation┊praise┊full nelson┊rough sex┊hints of double penetration┊begging┊orgasm denial┊getting caught┊exhibitionism┊multiple orgasm┊cunnilingus┊pet names (mostly just darling or something)┊pussy drunk bladie and yuan┊they cant get enough of u!! dealer's note; this was written a month ago or maybee more before being posted, and yes this was SPECIFICALLY something ive been looking for, FOR A LONGM LONG TIME AGO!!!! i didnt find it ofc, so why not just write it myself :3 anyway, to that one anon who sent a platonic jing yuan work request ill do it soon if i got an idea on how to write it AYUBUASBUASDUBAD also love u guys omg my accounts growing fast :((
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Who knows how you got into this position.. oh! You know.
You really just had to tease Blade during his important duties.. God, he was so frustrated. Your pretty face- pretty self, it made him insane. You just wanted to get into trouble huh? You know what you did, you really did know. He dragged you into your shared home afterwards, immediately ripping off those clothes you wore. It's okay, Jing Yuan could buy another set of outfits for you.
Blade got you all riled up and wet, but he never let you cum. You were so tired.. fingered, stretched out. His fingers scissored your insides to loosen you up for his giant cock. And when you were all messed up, crying for him, he finally let you.
Not before you say "Please" and take his cock though, he needs you all messed up first.
Unfortunately, (or fortunately, hm?) you came, just as you saw the sight of Jing Yuan entering the room. He looked so unfazed, so unbothered as he walked up to you and Blade.
"Jing Yuan, you're home early."
Blade spoke, spreading your legs wider for him as you had your back to his chest- sitting ontop of him.
"A lovely welcome, Blade."
Jing Yuan replied, walking over to you with a gentle.. mischievous smile. You and Blade were at the edge of the bed, giving Jing Yuan easy access to your greedy sex.
He flicked a finger on it, sweetly dragging it across your sensitive spot. But you just came! You were so sensitive.
You were too fucked out to notice what Blade was doing, till he laid down- dragging you with him.
"Jing Yuan, aren't they so welcoming?"
He asked Blade, slowly moving his hands down to your waist. Full nelson, such a vulnerable position for the both of you. Your legs spread even more, as Jing Yuan opened them.
You gasped as you felt Blade move again, his thrusts unforgiving. It felt so good.. but then Jing Yuan started to suckle on your throbbing little spot.
"Mmghn- J-Jing Yuan! S'too s-sensitive.. anghuuugh~~! S-Sho' good! D-Don't stooppnmhn!"
You moaned out, but Blade seemed to be speeding up his thrusts. He used a hand to caress your face, making you look at him, even though your vision was cloudy, and you couldn't look at him fully.
"Come on, don't you think you can get my name out of your mouth too? Ah, Jing Yuan, this is a punishment for them, they were a bit naughty during my work phase."
Blade spoke to the both of you, bucking his hips up harder.
"B-Blade! pleaseeenghuhnmnh!"
You moaned, asking for release. Jing Yuan then started sucking even more sloppily- he used his hands to gently part your legs even farther.
It was a heavenly mix of rough and gentle, you couldn't ask for more.
Yet- both of them had the power to make you ask for even more.
"N-Need to c-cumgnhn! P-Please! H-Haven't I been so g-goodmngh~?"
You begged them, yet they were so stern. Atleast Blade was, unlike Jing Yuan.
"Blade, don't you think we should let our little darling cum?"
Jing Yuan asked, trying to persuade Blade. He then licked a fat stripe up your sex, that sweet little spot that greedily throbbed for their attention.
"Hm.. I supposed they were good."
Blade said, before suddenly pulling out. Why? You thought, but then-
He slammed it back in with force, so hard. He continued slamming it back in and out, pulling it out all the way before thrusting it deep inside.
Jing Yuan on the other hand got the hint, suddenly speeding up his sucks and licks, he kneaded your thighs with his hands, trying to stimulate you even further. You looked at Jing Yuan, seeing him looking at you with a gentle smile, which didn't match his speed right now at all. Blade on the other hand, you could feel him smirking- licking your neck and biting.
"C-Close- mhaaangh!~ L-Love you two s-so much!"
The feeling was too much- and they both went so feral after the "I love you" you spat out at them. Moaning loudly as you came, you felt Blade's thrusts slow and Jing Yuan's mouth retract itself from you.
"Hahhng...."
You breath out, before gasping as you felt Blade move suddenly again. You look at Jing Yuan, silently pleading hm to stop- but not really, it felt all too good. But then you notice Jing Yuan take off his pants too..
"Ready to take both of us, darling?"
Jing Yuan said. God, you would be sore as fuck in the morning.
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