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vote-gaara · 1 year

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The Sands of Time: Gaara's Story

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Summary: Gaara, Temari and Kankuro have made it back to Sunagature after having retreated from their country's defeated invasion on the Hidden Leaf Village. Now the siblings must stand before the Suna Council, fully preparing to be reprimanded for their failure, but instead there's a surprise in store...

Join Gaara as he learns to navigate his world, desperately clinging to the same ideals as Uzumaki Naruto, so that he can become someone special to others. The road to a better future isn't an easy one, and the path is surely treacherous with danger and betrayal looming, but for poor Gaara there is just no other choice...

Words: 2600

Warnings: Death Mention, Murder Mention, Sad Gaara :(

Author's Notes: This is actually the beginning of a two “book” series following the growing friendship (and eventual romance) between Gaara and my OC. However the first few chapters offer pretty solid, stand-alone explanations for how Temari, Kankuro and Gaara were promoted so fast, and how Gaara was eventually made Kazekage years after Rasa died….I hope you enjoy this either as a stand alone piece, or as part of the series it belongs to. THERE ARE NO ORIGINAL CHARACTERS IN THIS CHAPTER.

Chapter One: Mission Failed!

“Perhaps even I some day…”

***

Three figures sat hiding within the forest’s edge, sheltering from the dry wind that swept across the flat grassland beyond. Soon the three of them would be home to their desert village, where they could discard their filthy clothes, tend to their wounds and rest easy knowing that they were finally safe.

It had been an arduous and painful two and a half days as they traveled through enemy territory, tensing up at the slightest rustle of foliage in fear that they had been tracked down by an Anbu squad, or even just a more rejuvenated surveying squad.

Though there was always suspense journeying through unfamiliar territory, the tension between the three shinobi, who were just barely teenagers, was immensely greater than that. They were injured, exhausted, and in no condition to fight, and they knew very well that a retaliation mission could have been launched at any moment to take vengeance on them for what their country had done.

Worse, still, was the bitter misery of distrust between them, for although they were fellow Suna shinobi and siblings, they felt alienated from one another; as if they were their own stars separated by a thick, dark, void of emptiness where they could see each other’s light, but it was so far away and felt so cold, so sterile, so miserable.

Gaara sat apart from his brother and sister, slumped up against a tree trunk where he was nursing a stiff injured shoulder and a throbbing pain in his head. A sensation he once found enthralling now has become a burden as he wished that the ache would subside and allow him to think clearly.

“Uzumaki Naruto…” He thought, squinting in pain as the breeze made the light between the leaves dance on the dark forest floor. “Could I be like that one day, too?”

He stole a glance at his siblings who were sitting close together. They were silent mostly, but every so often they would murmur to each other, words that Gaara couldn’t hear. They never bothered to glance his way, anyway. Just two days prior, he couldn’t have cared less about what they were saying, but now he found he was experiencing a sense of yearning that was strong and unceasing, like an urgent itch. He wanted to know, to connect, but he didn't know how.

“Why don’t they talk to me?”

The voice was so small, so meek and yet it passed through his mind with such speed that Gaara wondered if he had ever thought it at all. Perhaps it was just the pain. He had never had thoughts like that before…No, that wasn't true. He had, but so very long ago that he could barely remember what it was like to crave the company of others. All that he could remember now was the pain; the pain and the…

He closed his eyes, his head throbbing all the more.

***

“It’s time,” Baki stated in his deep, gruff voice from where he stood in the doorway.

Gaara glanced at him. It had been a week since he and his siblings had returned to Suna, but it was clear that being home didn’t mean their work was over - it was far from it.

When they had returned home, they were whisked away to the Suna hospital where they were put into separate rooms and treated. Gaara had watched from his examination room as medical-nin peered in to glance at him, only to become startled and recoil in horror when his eyes met theirs. He could hear their hushed, urgent murmurs as he continued to wait, painfully aware of how unwelcome his very presence was in a facility that swore to heal the sick and injured, regardless of prejudice.

Yet it had taken almost an hour and a half before a young medical ninja slinked into the room. He began treating Gaara’s wounds quickly and without speaking, dabbing at the wounds with hands that trembled so visibly that Gaara excused him almost immediately.

Gaara was aware of his effect on people, but seeing their responses before his eyes always made his stomach churn. He watched silently, a smoldering anger like a mourning burning up in his insides, as the young medical-nin bowed quickly - clumsily - before swiftly departing, leaving Gaara alone to assess his half bandaged injuries, the room cold, quiet and empty.

Now, a week later, Gaara was in his bedroom, waiting for Baki to arrive to inform him that the head of Suna was ready for him.

“The elders have reviewed your mission report,” Baki said to Gaara, getting straight to business. It may have been odd, but in the last few days Gaara had grown to appreciate Baki’s ability to look at him directly, to speak to him without being terrified. What once felt annoying to Gaara now felt like salvation, for even though Baki's tone was strictly professional, it made Gaara feel human. “We have lost a great deal during this invasion, so I wouldn’t expect any praise.”

Gaara nodded, remaining silent and somber as he followed his sensei through the corridors of the estate. He allowed his mind to wander.

Back when Gaara had left the treatment room at the hospital, he had quickly glanced around for Temari and Kankuro only to realize that they had left him. Gaara had departed then, expecting to go home to his room to rest, but was quickly ushered into the meeting chamber where his brother and sister were waiting for him.

“The fourth Kazekage is dead.”

Gaara didn’t know how to feel about his father’s death at that moment. He wasn’t even certain he saw Rasa as a father at all, and yet as the days passed an odd form of anguish began tearing at his stomach, and Gaara found himself angry all over again. He wanted to lash out at others, to inflict hurt, to kill, but he knew he couldn’t do those things anymore - No, he didn't want to do those things anymore. Yet he didn't trust himself and so he holed himself up in his room, only leaving for physical necessities and for his duties as a shinobi.

Now sensei and student walked into the meeting chamber to a row of elders who bore into him with scrutinizing eyes. Gaara looked past them, his eyes resting on the statue that was erected in his father’s honor, but his heart felt nothing.

“Ah, and here’s Lord Gaara,” One of them quipped as if the elders had been talking about him - and perhaps they had been. “Lady Temari and Lord Kankuro will be joining us shortly, I assume.”

Baki nodded, “I hear them coming now.”

Temari and Kankuro stepped into the room, lining up next to Gaara without looking at him. They both greeted the elders, who did so in kind.

“Let’s get down to business, shall we?” The oldest of the counsel, Jōseki, called everyone's attention. "As you all know, your father, the fourth Kazekage, has been murdered. Our investigation points to Orochimaru as the culprit, and our evidence suggests he had assassinated and used Lord Fourth's identity in order to better manipulate the politics of Suna. We don’t have to explain that this has dire consequences for Sunagature."

"Not only is it a matter that we have to be vigilant against any spies that have been implanted during this betrayal, but without our Kazekage, we are vulnerable to other villages who may have been informed of our political status." Another counselor, Gōza, cut in.

"We also have to be prepared for a retaliation invasion by The Land of Fire at any moment." Joseki continued, "And the status between our village and the daimyō is still to be determined."

"No matter how you look at it, the fate of our village is balancing on a lot of very dangerous factors." Another one of them said as he cleared his throat, the only tell indicating that the calm union of faces who were addressing Temari, Kankuro and Gaara held tension among them.

Shinobi weren't just physical tools used to sacrifice flesh and bone to the grinders that were their missions; they were mental and emotional assets that gave nothing away as they endured countless instances of immense fear, sorrow, anger and sacrifice. They were thus burdened to not only offer up their very health, and even their lives, to their nation, but the mental and emotional energy that was tethered to their refined and well trained physical forms.

Just as a person whose body was injured to the point of collapse lost their consciousness, Shinobi who experienced emotional and mental fatigue were physically vulnerable; not just in how another may conquer them, but in how they could lose to their own impulses and act out poorly.

Which wasn't that how Gaara had acted during his time in Konoha?

The tension that the elders held was an indication that there was something of great emotional weight to be discussed, and Gaara already knew precisely what it was.

“You all acted with disgrace during your time in The Land of Fire.” Jōseki cut in, not allowing the counselor’s hesitancy to continue so long that it would give it away. “Not only did your actions reflect poorly on the dignity of Sunagature during the Chunin Exams, but your very actions had caused the mission to fail and thus the security of the village rests on your consciences.”

More of the counselor’s spoke up, addressing their disapproval and admonishing all of the siblings equally, despite the mission's failure having rested solely on Gaara's own bloodlust in his desire to stop at no length to kill Uchiha Sasuke. Temari and Kankuro had no choice but to retreat with him under orders given to them by Baki. Neither of them had done anything wrong, they were simply responding to their changing circumstances under immense pressure from both Gaara and the plan; however the council couldn’t address it like that.

The elders, despite having been hardened Shinobi with great skill and power, were still afraid of Gaara's power; perhaps not for their own safety, but for that of the village. It was simply a matter of tact that they skirt around reprimanding him directly, including Temari and Kankuro into the blame to soften the blow. There were already so many imminent dangers threatening those who called the desert home, they didn't need Gaara to be the final strike that would kill the already withering village of Sunagature.

Gaara found himself wondering what it would be like to have the elders solely single him out for his insubordination. What would it feel like to watch his siblings be praised for their own efforts and for him to be ripped into with tongue lashings and scrutiny? Was that type of acknowledgement not possible for him?

He was no longer the Kazekage's delicate son, as there was no Kazekage any longer. The elders couldn’t hide behind status as a reason to not criticize him. Instead, Gaara was acutely aware that the elders were afraid of him, just as everyone else was, and so they continued to handle him like a weapon that could unleash demolition and death at the blink of an eye.

Temari and Kankuro both bowed their apologies, accepting their share of the blame because they knew, along with everyone else in the room, that they were not the ones being rebuked. Gaara still felt strained by this, however, as even though the scolding was empty for his older brother and sister, he wondered if the injustice of taking the blame made them hate him even more.

Not that a Shinobi would ever dare admit to being upset by unfairness.

"But enough of the wallowing," Gōza piped up, taking a stand at the round table. "We have other, more constructive, matters to discuss."

Gaara was mildly surprised by the sudden change of course, but the feeling quickly passed. "They can't discipline us too harshly. Suna has risked and lost too much to the invasion, they need us for their next mission." Gaara reasoned. Yet as sound as Gaara’s logic may have been, he was incorrect.

Gōza continued, "As you know, the Chunin Exams are a cooperative event between villages, whose high ranking officials name those who they see worthy of promotion to go on to be Chunin. However, due to our recently severed ties to The Leaf Village, it is our prerogative to promote those who we deem fit."

Gaara could sense his brother and sister stiffen in surprise. "Are you saying you're promoting us to Chunin?" Kankuro blurted out, unable to help himself. His shock was warranted, as Kankuro had forfeited in the semi-finals and wouldn't have even been discussed as a candidate had the Chunin Exams concluded normally.

"You are all excellent Shinobi," Gōza said, "You all could have passed as Chunin long ago. It was merely a procedural and tactical matter that you compete, but due to our circumstances having changed, we have all come to an agreement that you three will move on to being Chunin of The Hidden Sand."

The siblings didn’t know how to react, as they weren’t expecting this. However, all three of them bowed and thanked the counselors, Gaara’s own thanks just barely audible in the big, open chamber.

“Ever since The Third Kazekage disappeared many years ago, the tribes forming Sunagature have agreed the Kazekage title be passed down to heirs,” Joseki explained. There was a certain acidity in his voice as he appraised the three young siblings. “With your father being dead, that means that the Kazekage title could be claimed by any of you three. However, you are all much too young and not skilled enough - as skilled as you may be.”

Gaara could see now the disdain Joseki had as his hard glare found Gaara. It cut into him like whips, and Gaara returned the sentiment. “Though Sunagature is in dire need of a strong and shrewd leader during our current circumstances, we have suspended our decision to elect a shinobi of no blood relation to Lord Fourth. This is due to our current agreement between tribes, nothing more. And so we will wait for one of you three to improve enough to be deemed worthy of the respect and admiration of the Kazekage name. That is the sole reason for your promotion, nothing more.”

Gaara watched as the rest of the counselors’ eyes shifted towards Joseki, their quick glances containing surprise but also a mild disapproval; even Baki had allowed the smallest line of tension to come between his brow. Perhaps what Joseki was saying carried a great deal of truth to it, but his own abrasiveness towards the three siblings was palpable and thus undesirable by the rest of the council.

Still, the elders were in agreement enough that they excused the careless delivery of the information. Rather they looked back towards Temari, Kankuro and Gaara and asked if they had any questions, to which none of them did.

“Then this meeting is concluded,” Joseki said as he stood from his place at the table. Before anyone had any opportunity to move, he stalked out of the room, shooting Gaara one more look of abhorrence as he passed, leaving everyone else to listen as his footsteps faded in the long, echoey halls of the Kazekage estate.

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void-occupation · 11 months

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Whatever you do, don't think about how the song "Remember Everything" by Five Finger Death Punch fits Halt and his childhood trauma to a T.

I'm not going to go into a full analysis. I'm not going to go into a full analysis. I'm not going to go into a full-

FULL ANALYSIS AHEAD (disclaimer: "Remember Everything" does not belong to me)

"Dear mother, I love you. I'm sorry I wasn't good enough. Dear father, forgive me. Cause in your eyes, I just never added up. In my heart I know I failed you, but you left me here alone."

Halt talks about how Ferris was the favorite child, and how his parents fought all the time. We all know by now about Halt's tendency to blame himself for things (as seen in "The Battle for Skandia" and "Erak's Ransom"). He probably blamed himself for his parents arguing all the time - hell, he literally said that he refused to tell his parents that Ferris was actively trying to kill him because he thought that Ferris was the only thing they cared about and he didn't want to take that away from them. Even though it was his choice, Halt was a kid. He probably felt at least a little bit abandoned and betrayed that his parents didn't seem to even notice anything amiss before Halt ran away.

"If I could hold back the rain, would you numb the pain? Cause I remember everything."

Something else that is touched on in the fourth book is Halt's tendency to deflect conversations that confront him on his fears and such. It's a fairly offhand note, but it has some pretty big implications. Halt has this need to make sure that everyone else is okay, while simultaneously ensuring that no one ever sees his suffering. He is constantly shielding other people, and feels guilty when he requires that same protection.

"Dear brother, just don't hate me for never standing by you, or being by your side."

I refuse to believe that Ferris was the murderous evil twin from the start. There was probably a very large portion of heir childhood where Halt and Ferris were close, before Ferris became obsessed with the crown. That would be a good reason why Halt only suspected Ferris later on. I feel like Halt would spend a lot of time telling himself that it was something he did that sent Ferris over the edge, and he would blame himself for the betrayal.

"Dear sister, please don't blame me. I only did what I thought was truly right."

I can't be the only one who thinks that Halt always regretted leaving Caitlyn behind, but he knew it was either that or kill Ferris, which is something I don't think he would ever be capable of doing. He loved his twin too much.

"It's a long and lonely road when you know you walk alone."

I know that Halt wasn't technically alone, and he became part of a massive found family, but not being able to tell anyone about the things he went though, and the people he left behind as well as his reasoning would have been isolating - if not crushing - for anyone. Hell, no one knew his real last name or anything about his past for just about 24 years. Not even mentioning the fact that when he finally admits it, he is 41 years old, so he has hidden this for well over half his life, not counting the 17 years he actually lived in Clonmel. That is a long time to carry around huge amounts of trauma without telling anyone who cares about you.

"I feel like running away, I'm still so far from home."

This one is fairly obvious. However, it is not talked about nearly enough that Halt is a runaway. Let that sink in for a second. What do you think of when you hear the term 'runaway' in reference to a child? For most, it's the thought of a kid escaping an abusive household and living on the streets with nothing but a backpack filled with belongings. That was what Halt did at 17. Except he had to go all the way to a foreign country to escape his situation. And the only person he ever saw from home again was the person who had made him leave in the first place.

"I'll burn it all to the ground before I let you in."

This is pretty much Halt's whole philosophy on showing any sort of emotion to people. He didn't smile around Will until months into his apprenticeship, and it took years until he was able to summon the courage to tell Will the truth about his mother. And again, the whole 24 years of absolute secrecy about his childhood doesn't exactly show someone that is willing to open themselves up to others.

"Please forgive me, I can't forgive you now."

Halt still blames himself for the rift between himself and Ferris, but he is also consumed by hurt and betrayal over the fact that Ferris cared more for the crown then he did his own brother, and I can't blame him even a little bit for feeling that way. Especially considering that when they do finally meet up again, Ferris shows no real sign of regret for his actions.

All-in-all, this just feels like a violently Halt-esque song. The pain and regret is something I think his character suffers a lot of, and this captures that really well.

If you made it to the end of that ungodly ramble, kudos to you because holy hell, I think I was temporarily possessed by the god of angst.

#halt o'carrick #ferris o'carrick #caitlyn o'carrick #halt's parents #there's seriously no tag for that??#ranger's apprentice #will treaty #five finger death punch #I seem to be completely incapable of producing a post that is a reasonable length #someone take tumblr away from me #character study #“Halt Go To Therapy” Challenge: fucking failed #What The Hell Are You Talking About I Am Completely Normal About This Character

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sassysoulstranger · 1 year

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𝔻𝕖𝕤𝕥𝕣𝕠𝕪𝕖𝕕 𝕓𝕪 𝕒 𝕙𝕦𝕘

•Often all you need to break a person is to give them a hug.

•Pairing: Michael Afton x Charlie Emily.

•Warning: mention of suicide, depressive, self-injury.

It's all bullshit...

It's nice to create a fantasy to escape reality sometimes, but what was going through his mind was a new world he would like to belong to. He had music blaring from his headphones, locked in the darkness of his room.

He hadn't been out in days and was looking sickly and pathetic, but he didn't care, if his stomach twisted around demanding food or if his throat dried up until he forced himself out for a glass of water, he would go back to misery in his loneliness punishing himself for being born.

His thoughts were filled with so much negativity about himself that killing himself was just another joke to him. Michael hated himself to the point of cutting every part of his arms, pinching and biting his fingernails until they were too short to hurt, but he didn't care. He hoped that all that pain he caused himself would replace the burning in his chest.

His father did nothing to help him, nor did he care, he seemed to want to contribute to the damage Michael was doing to himself by sarcastically teasing or hitting him.

Nor did they stop his misery at school, everyone seemed to see him as a murderer, looking at him with contempt and others with a certain fear at the sight of those dead eyes. He seemed to be dead inside, walking around hunched over trying to go unnoticed by the rest but with his height it seemed to be an impossible task, he was intimidating.

He found in his studies a way to distract his mind from the judgmental stares of the others, even from his own guilt-ridden thoughts. The teachers didn't seem to want to deal with him after the incident, they simply left him alone without questioning his appearance or his blood-stained shirt sleeves.

He felt like he was on the edge of the building with each passing day, the constant guilt was a huge burden that seemed to weigh down each day, the thought of being alive felt like a waste in his life. He wished he was dead.

*SLAP*

His eyes widened like saucers looking at the person in front of him, it was Charlie, worry was plastered on her face looking at him with annoyance as tears threatened to spill from her eyes.

-What the fuck is wrong with you Mike?" Hearing how her voice broke broke his soul, he never liked to see her cry, much less knowing that he was the reason.

-I...I- His voice didn't seem to want to come out, it felt like an eternity trying to remember the last time he had a talk with someone.

He seemed to be frozen in place, he had left school early after having a fight with Mark, he considered him his brother when they were a gang, but when he challenged him and blamed him for Evan's death he just exploded.

Charlie saw it all when she heard the screams of the students when she saw Michael full of Mark's blood on his knuckles staining his clothes with every blow, when he saw her he stopped and ran away from the place.

She knew where he was going, it was the safe place for both of them, they hid whenever they got into mischief and didn't want to confront their parents, a place that gave way to many talks that brought them together as friends and discussions that drove them further and further apart over the years.

She was already imagining how her father would punish her for running away from classes, but seeing Michael so destroyed she couldn't stand it anymore, for everyone his best friend was a monster, a murderer who deserved everything that was happening to him, everyone wanted to see Michael fail again and again until he stepped on all his desires to live until he committed suicide.

She remembered all the trouble she got into defending Michael, arguments she had with her own friends trying to make her understand things the way they did and this bothered her like never before. She was determined to defend him, but Mike pushed her away, ignored her for so long that she felt that their friendship no longer existed, Charlie only suffered in silence, but always persistent in sticking by his side.

She quickly went to the place where Michael was hiding, trying to be as silent as possible when she was close enough to look for him everywhere in that lonely abandoned park.

When she found him the relief and the smile on her face changed to a terrified one, feeling her fists clench so tight that her knuckles turned white, Michael was cutting himself with a small razor, his face was pale and his eyes darkened with rage that she didn't understand at that moment.

She slapped him as hard as she could, she was furious, worried and impotent, she wanted to hit him until she got those ideas out of his head, she wanted to make him react to the force of what he was doing.

But she was trembling, feeling the tears threatening to come out when she saw him so deplorable, she felt that if she wasn't here, she could have lost his best friend, but seeing him as he was full of wounds and cuts she knew she was losing him long ago.

-ANSWER ME MICHAEL AFTON, WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING THIS TO YOURSELF? WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME?" He looked at her in disbelief, seeing how the tears stained her face trembling with impotence made him see what was happening.

-Forgive me Charlotte..." His voice sounded raspy and deeper than usual, Charlie tried to calm herself and just knelt down near him while she gave him a bottle of water and he thanked her for the gesture.

He sighed in relief after drinking almost the whole bottle, he looked down to see her hugging her knees and hiding her face between them, he knew she was crying.

He felt guilt and carefully moved closer to her, hesitating a little he finally decided to bring his hand closer and caress her hair to get her attention.

She lifted her head a little and could see her eyes full of tears and worry, his heart was pounding, filling him with guilt and strangely warmth, they remained in a comfortable silence, until Charlie dried her tears and lifted her head to see him, determined to speak.

-When...when did you start cutting yourself?" He looked away when he saw the intensity in her eyes, he took a deep breath trying to find the words to answer.

-A few weeks ago- He couldn't even look at her, he felt embarrassed and pathetic.

She didn't respond and it only got on Mike's nerves, he felt pain, burning in his heart. He never seemed to care if others saw her wounds he wouldn't care what their reaction was, but when it came to Charlie that fear was present, that she would get upset with him or confront him like right now, he couldn't lie to her, not to her.

His mind stilled all thought feeling the warmth of her arms around him, that warmth he was craving so badly, he was so long in solitude that this small token of affection seemed to bring him down more than any blow, he didn't realize it when he started to cry and apologize.

He felt so weak, as if all this pain that had been tormenting him for months began to unburden itself as he cried loudly clinging to Charlie, he cried like never before feeling it all come out.

Charlie was crying too, sharing all that pain in that embrace burying her head in his shoulder caressing his back comforting him, she couldn't imagine how much Michael suffered, now she was there for him and she wouldn't let him go until he was completely relieved.

Taking her away from him was a mistake, he was desperate for her warmth, hugs and talks.

He didn't want to hurt her like he hurt his brother, he didn't want her to see him so miserable, he thought he would be better off just enduring the pain. But there he was clinging to her embrace, crying like a child desperately seeking comfort.

For Mike there was nothing he longed for more in this world than the warmth with which Charlie held him, and for Charlie there was nothing she longed for more in this miserable world than to save the person she loved most.

#michael afton #fnaf marlie #charlie emily #michael afton x charlie emily #michael afton and charlie emily #fnaf

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saint-gerard-of-arc · 2 years

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I would like to talk to you but im also brain-dead today so I can't come up with a topic so this is a permission to ramble about your ocs as much as you want

Omg lmao what an opportunity!! I know we talked about them a lot but should I start from the beginning?

This is Russell. He's a failed bioweapon experiment and a certified bastard. He's inspired by Nikki but I don't know about you, he gives me MASSIVE Danger Days era Gerard Way vibes. He's been experimented on and was trained to be a murder machine since a very young age, until the laboratory he was created on had a massive incident which Russ survived and managed to escape from. He ran away until he reached the Old City, where he met his now best friend. There he gets by by doing favours to the local gangs but he never got in one. He works alone and for himself first of all.

Before I defined him as a "failed bioweapon experiment", what does it mean you may ask? Well, sometimes Russell has instincts to kill and destroy. When in very stressful circumstances, something in his brain activates and he becomes what the scientists back in the lab created him for. And because he doesn't know how to control these instincts, he uses hardcore drugs to restrain himself or calm himself down. He has nightmares about killing every night, when he wakes up in cold sweat and screaming, afraid that he has murdered someone in his sleep.

Russell... He's is not a very sociable person, but he's not inherently bad. He was created to be evil, and maybe sometimes he craves chaos, but his real nature is kind. You just have to pick him up from the right angle. But also if you don't bother him that should help. He enjoys music, reading philosophy and writing poetry, something that is so secret, not even his friends know about.

In conclusion I love Russ with all my heart he's a baby bastard and I wish I could punch him in the teeth and then kiss him (bc men covered in blood are sexy)

This is Dylan. He's inspired by Tommy. He met Russell during a fight. He's the chillest dude you could ever meet, but has a hard time to contain his strength. He could hug you and snap your spine in half. He lives in the Old City with his family made out of his parents and his twin sister and little brother, and they sorta adopted Russell too since he's almost always at their house. His father is a war veteran, and the jacket Dylan's always wearing belongs to him.

Dylan is a hopeless romantic, and longs to find love. The problem is, he's a disaster bisexual who falls in love with someone new everyday (although his only true love will always be Russ but shhh). He loves motorbikes and enjoys tinkering with any sorts of motors or electronics.

This is Frankie, inspired by Vince. They're a little ambiguous as a character, I have yet to understand them. They live in the New City, and meet up with Russ and Dyl while the two were visiting for a "special delivery", while Frankie was trying to stir up an uprising. Frankie was created in a lab to be one of the "perfect citizens" of the New City, but, like many others, they are a deviant who lives in the shadows of the suburbs.

Frankie's biggest wish is to stand out from the crowd. They have trust issues, but they're not bad once you get to know them. Frankie is very creative, they enjoy making their own clothes and skateboarding. It'll take a while before they and Russ will get along (maybe bc Frankie could be asexual and Russ keeps flirting with them but who knows)

This is Viktor Daisuke. Just like Mick, he's the dad of the group. He used to work for the New City's government, one of the best in charge. Once he discovered what the gov was up to, he rebelled, which cost him his freedom and his family. He met with the rest of the gang while he evaded prison. Vik has bionic legs.

Vik is not very sociable, not at all, actually. Very little is known about him.

Together, they are the Untouchable Gang.

#witchy's ask booth #oc: the gang's all here #WHEW that took a LOT out of me lmao but I could talk about them for hours #I need to save this sheet too for reference #bulletproof bandits

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fandom-scatteredthoughtsonpaper · 3 years

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Hi hi! i think you said asks were open in your newest post? If not feel free to ignore this lol

I would love to see headcannons of an MC who, though acting brave, gets very scared of the brothers

example after lucifer and the grimoire and such? like MC slowly becomes MORE scared of them, and tries to hide it, but it's getting obvious that theyre scared if that makes sense lol 💖

Ahhhhh, sorry this took longer than it necessarily should have! I feel like I was much closer to what you wanted with this request than the other, so hopefully you'll enjoy it too ❤️

GN MC THAT PROGRESSIVELY FEARS THE BROTHERS

Living with demons is hard, especially when they're the rulers of hell, err, the Devildom.

Sure, there's the implication they're not supposed to hurt or do anything harmful to you, as you have the safety of being an exchange student, but that veil of ignorance was quickly lifted before even the two week mark of living with these brothers.

You've tried getting along with them, and for the most part you've been successful, but a few circumstances have arisen that have reminded you that these boys are dangerous demons... and you're the human that keeps poking the three-headed dog while it sleeps.

Mammon:

You're not so much scared of what Mammon could physically do, but you're paranoid that he goes into your room and rummages in your belongings and personal keepsakes. Your room is the only thing you have that you can claim as your own, and it's your sanctuary, despite it being in the brothers' house.

Of course, the brothers will periodically just barge in without alerting you by asking or knocking, but you've grown okay with that. You're at least in your room and able to see what they do in there. There are a few occasions Levi or Satan might mention going into your bedroom to retrieve a video game or book they had loaned you, but you make sure to put their item on the dresser by the entrance, so they don't have to venture too far in. You're okay with that.

You're not okay, however, with Mammon when he goes into your room unannounced. Hell, you're not totally comfortable with him being in your room unattended if he does give you a heads-up.

You know how kleptomaniac Mammon can be. You've heard enough complaints and stories to know how relentless Mammon can be in his search for anything that could give him a few Grimm from his brothers. You've talked with this greedy demon about items he's stolen, witnessed thefts a few times too.

So, you feel something akin to victimized when Mammon goes into your room without your permission or you being there. Your room emits this vibe of disturbance, and it bothers you because you don't know what might be missing or "borrowed". It troubles you more because now your room feels foreign again, like the atmosphere was plagued by essences that you know aren't yours. Your anxiety swells with paranoia, fear, and mistrust again.

Leviathan:

Oh, for the most part, you don't have much conflict with Levi anymore. Once you made a pact with the otaku demon he relaxed a lot more and invited you to hang out in his room to play games or fuss about animation qualities in animes or gush about his favorite manga characters.

It's just that after that contest of who was the bigger TSL fan and Levi, enveloped by jealousy and fury, came at you with the intent to seriously harm you, you've had this overly-suspicious fear in the back of your mind, itching your paranoia that it could happen again.

You've learned that Levi's demon form is easily triggered by extreme feelings, rather that's excitement, irritability, or the emotion he avatars over, and you can't help be irritationally cautious when that happens. It's a reflex from the panic that engraved itself into your psyche for self-preservation.

If you weren't so anxious about another envy-fueled incident involving your life you might find Levi's excitement for the stuff he loves more endearing and cute.

Beelzebub:

If you hadn't seen how destructive Beel's tantrums over food firsthand could be you might find it hard to believe this relaxed and mostly uninvolved brother would have such a temper... but you did experience it, so you do believe it.

It was a custard! They're so easy to get more of, but Beel immediately flew off the handle and wouldn't see reasoning, lashing out and destroying the kitchen. If Mammon hadn't pulled you down with him to the floor as Beel started his outraged tantrum you're positive you would have been collateral damage too, like your poor room that was unfortunately placed on the other side of the kitchen wall.

It was a terrifying sight to behold, seeing the kitchen torn asunder and reduced to broken walls, obliterated cabinets, and smashed counters, with kitchen utensils and ruined cookware being sent into flight and raining down, razor-sharp and shattered into broken edges that could easily pierce flesh.

That moment of destruction lingers, along with the intense emotion of fright, triggered whenever Beel complains about being hungry or when he meets your gaze at the table during times to eat. You immediately offer your unfinished plate to him, which he happily accepts and consumes in seconds, to appease the Avatar of Gluttony's temper.

Asmodeus:

Asmo's promiscuity and salaciousness are what unnerve you the most. He's the Avatar of Lust, so obviously you were already on your defense, but you've seen glimpses beyond the surface level to what Asmo can be like. That's what intrigues you about him, and you try to focus on those bits that slip past his perfectionistic lifestyle and narcissistic personality. At the same time, however, this is the cause of your near downfalls when Asmo tries to allure you with his physical prowess.

He's tried a few times to charm you, and you feel this invasive power trying to persuade you to give into your raw and sexual temptations, or this tugging sensation that tries to attract you beyond what you feel is comfortable. The repulsed response is usually what repels you from the power Asmo tries to flaunt over you.

He usually huffs after his failed attempt but quickly rebounds by placing his hands around you and trying to embrace you himself, which Mammon, prompted by his denied feelings and jealousy, usually intercepts in your honor.

There's a few times you've worried yourself nauseous Asmo will corner you, and you won't be able to save yourself from his lustful persuasion. There's also the couple of times he's mentioned eating your heart, so that's also worrisome.

Satan:

There's no questions that you secretly fear Satan, more specifically his wrath. You slighted him once before, and the threat he imposed upon you while you were trapped between his demonic form and an over-stuffed bookcase was enough to brand itself to your soul as a reminder.

As docile as Satan may appear with his affection for cats, deep interest for detective shows, and shared affinity of books he could and, possibly, would rip you apart and lavish in the blood that wept from your lacerated flesh and tension of your bones rebelling before snapping satisfactory in halves and thirds.

Other than that, Satan is much easier to hang out with compared to his brothers, except when he gets that cruel temperament to torment Lucifer, which you exempt yourself from if the pranks are too excessive.

Belphegor:

Terror has never seeped into your soul like this before. Your anxiety spikes to levels you've never experienced before when Belphie plops down next to you on the couch or tries to start up a conversation. Your fight, flight, freeze, or fawn system goes haywire, and you become petrified, unable to respond properly.

You either stay away from Belphie altogether or stay glued to one of the other brothers, Mammon or Beel preferably. Just in case.

Just in case Belphie's lament arises again in the form of murderous hate, gleeful contempt clouding his eyes, as his hands find their way to your neck that remembers the tight embrace his fingers engraved into the nerves of your throat, the ghostly suffocating that chokes you up sometimes if you become too immersed in the memory of a body that hadn't belonged to you.

You're also sure you remember an aching in your ribs and spine that causes you to shiver sometimes, but you're not sure if you experienced that in a dream or illusion of the timeline merging. It still bothers you all the same.

For such a sweet face and quiet voice, Belphie is a demon that decieves, and you're better off staying away from him until you're over your PTSD. If that's possible.

Lucifer:

How many times has he almost killed you? Twice or three times? Enough to be too many and to penetrate your core with panic and trepidation whenever you see that sly smile that forms on his lips. It doesn't have to be directed at you, but it's enough to launch you into a panic attack that you barely keep under control.

That safety guard of being a representative from the human world and exchange student mean nothing when you test it by being a busybody in affairs that definitely don't involve you over and over again, especially when it's the pride and dignity of Lucifer being tested.

You hear your lesson but never learn, and unconsciously you must be masochistic for how many times you've brushed death with Lucifer's anger, but you keep pushing the limits.

You can't help going to Mammon's defense when you feel Lucifer is only targeting him for personal reasons or standing up to his ego when you feel he's going over his limits. Your bravery is stupidity though, and you feel your courageous backbone turn into a central nerve system of adrenaline and fear. You're just too stubborn and self-righteous to let Lucifer do as he pleases, but that doesn't mean you're not scared out of your wits.

You've gained an intuition for when Lucifer is approaching or silently comes up from behind you, and it sends a shiver down your back almost every time you're alone together.

If you have any headcanons that you want me to write, please send them my way! I enjoy writing these out. NSFW is okay, but please know I might not do it if I don’t like it. ❤️

#obey me #obey me mammon #obey me lucifer #obey me asmo #obey me asmodeus #obey me beel #obey me belphegor #obey me belphie #obey me levi #obey me leviathan #obey me beelzebub #obey me satan #obey me headcanons #things from the inbox #jess writes #obey me requests #simpfortheseven

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justalarryblog · 3 years

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Hey beca! How are you? Do you have any recommendations fic like hl already in relationships, mpreg harry, they struggle to have a baby? Or arranged married? That have 100k words above? Thanks

Hi anon, thanks for the message! I'm doing fine, I hope you are too. :)

The only one I have mpreg!Harry that they struggle to have a baby is this one:

I Hope You Dance by @wickedarcher_08 (83k) | Explicit

Louis and Harry have been struggling with infertility for over a year. After many failed attempts, they decide to seek a specialist, but they end up with more than they ever dreamed.

For mpreg!Harry that is +100k words, I have:

Say Something by @kingsofeverything (105k) | Explicit

At fifty years old and recently divorced, Omega Harry Styles isn’t interested in dating. When his doctor suggests a heat and rut matching service, he signs up out of necessity. It’s the only use he has for an Alpha in his life.

Twenty-eight-year-old Alpha Louis Tomlinson aims to change that.

I also have a tag for Mpreg fics in case you wanna check if there's any other to your liking.

For arranged married, I've read these:

Through Eerie Chaos by @mediawhorefics (102k) | General Audiences

For as long as anyone can remember, Old Hillsbridge Manor has always been believed to be haunted. Everyone in the village agrees and keeps a respectful, fearful, distance. New in town after a bad breakup and an internship that led to disappointment rather than a permanent job, Harry Styles figures taking pictures of the decrepit building could be a great new creative project. Or at least a much-needed distraction while he searches for a job and crashes at his parents’ new house. No one warned him about the apparitions though; about the music, the laughter, the people who flicker and vanish when you call after them, the echoes of a past that should be long gone… Harry has never believed in spirits but even he can admit that there’s something weird going on. What starts as mere curiosity evolves into a full-blown investigation and soon enough, Harry finds himself making friends with an aristocrat from the 1920s and struggling with finding the best way to tell him that he’s dead.

The Ghost Hunter AU where Niall lives to prove ghosts are real, Zayn is a skeptical librarian and Harry gets caught up in a century-old mystery and catches feeling in the process.

Part 1 of Through Eerie Chaos

tastes like summer, smiles like may by @outropeace (47k) | Explicit

“Is this true?” Harry grabbed the beta by the shoulders. “Bryce, where did you hear that?”

“There’s rumors going around the castle,” he smirked. “stories about his beauty and his cold attitude. They know he is an omega only because of his scent, but he has never had a heat.”

“Do you know what this means?”

Bryce smirk grew into a big smile. “He can’t give you an heir.”

A cold prince, an alpha with nothing left to lose and a kingdom with a secret.

Praise the Mutilated World by @creamcoffeelou, @delsicle (106k) | Explicit

It was August when everything changed.

By October, the leaves changed, and so did Louis’ heart.

OR: An enemies to lovers dystopian au where Harry is an elite alpha and Louis is a rebel omega with too much to fight for. Every move made is monitored, and a fertile omega’s purpose in life is one thing: to give children to their alpha.

a dream is a wish your heart makes by orphan_account (22k) |Teen And Up Audiences

Fairytale retelling of Cinderella, where Harry is a servant boy who’s too kind, Louis is a prince in an arranged marriage, Liam is Harry’s step brother, and Niall is Louis’ dutiful grand duke.

Si Pudiera Volar by @softfonds (68k) | Explicit

When Harry’s fiancé leaves him for his cousin, he looks the other way for the sake of his happiness. He’ll do anything to forget about him, including joining a monastery. It isn’t until his cousin’s former lover, a pirate, appears that he realizes everything is not as it appears, and an honest pirate might be the only person worthy of his heart.

Or, a fic loosely based on Corazon Salvaje.

The Murmur of Yearning by @mediawhorefics (93k) | Mature

Four years ago, Harry Styles was forced into a marriage of convenience to enrich and ally both his and his promised’s families. The sudden, and slightly suspicious, death of the Marquess of Haxshire, however, brings great disturbance to Crescentfield Hall and, as his late’s husband’s closest male relative, Harry unexpectedly finds himself the head of a family he never felt he belonged to. Between a meddling distant cousin hellbent on inserting himself in Harry’s life, his wicked and mistrustful mother-in-law and his late husband’s advisors refusing to help or take him seriously, Harry struggles in the fight to keep what he’s earned and make the Estate finally feel like home.

Luckily, he doesn’t stand completely alone and finds himself an unlikely ally in Mr Tomlinson, the elusive Land Stewart who has been taking care of the property in the shadows for years. Louis Tomlinson is caring, patient, and unlike everyone else, he doesn’t seem to think Harry committed a murder.

the sanctity of patience by @scrunchyharry (22k) | Teen And Up Audiences

When young Lord Harry was chosen by King Louis of Bavaria to become his husband and prince consort, Harry thought all of his dreams had come through. His illusions came crashing down when he understood it meant living in isolation in the alpine castle of Neuschwanstein with a husband who turned out to be far from what he had hoped for.

His illusions vanished, Harry will have learn to appreciate what has and even, perhaps, fall in love with his imperfect husband and his castle.

Winter Pines and Ocean Eyes by @binarysunsets (14k) | Teen And Up Audiences

Harry is awoken by the sudden weight of his dog across his chest, and he yawns and stretches his arms above his head, relishing the crack of his back the gesture produces and sending Fen tumbling down onto the bed. There’s a niggling sensation that he has something important to do that day, but in his still-sleepy state he’s struggling to recall what it is. When it hits him, he freezes mid-rub of his eyes, and his hand slowly falls to the furs strewn across the bed. His fingers tangle into the fur and he bites his lip.

Right. It’s that day.

The day he’s meant to travel south.

Or, the arranged marriage au between young viking Harry, son of his clan’s chief, and a certain caesar by the name of Louis, heir to the empire.

Liberté by @larriebane(64k) | Mature

AU. 1647. “Pretending you don’t have a heart is not the best way to not get it broken. It’s just the easiest.”

Or the pirate AU I always wanted to write

Teenage Rebellion Never Worked Out So Well by @panda_bear21 (55k) | Not Rated

“I’m an adult!” He glanced down at Harry, who seemed anything but at the moment, where he was definitely on the brink of a temper tantrum. “We’re both adults!” Jay glanced to Anne again, before breathing out a heavy sigh. “Yes, but you’re both adults that do not have jobs and who live off of our money… Which means, you have to do what we say… or you’ll have to find a new place to live.” “You wouldn’t do that.” Louis dared, hoping his glare was enough to guilt trip his mother into calling the whole thing off. Or to tell them that it had all just been a huge joke and they weren’t actually being forced into marrying a complete stranger. “Oh, but we would.”

Or the super cliché arranged marriage fic where things escalate way too quickly.

infinitely all for me by @swallowsmateforlife (10k)| Explicit

The Alpha Louis’ been betrothed to since he was 14 has finally come of age and Louis’ been delivered to his home.

or: the one where they figure it all out

keep me safe, keep me sane, keep me honest by @hilourry (8k) | Explicit

Louis is the Prince of England. All past omega princes and princesses have been married and pregnant at age 18, so his parents arrange him to be married to Harry Styles, the royal family’s PR guy.

Sail Across Me by @iwillpaintasongforlou (21k) | Explicit

Harry is a prince that is about to be forced into marriage against his will and running away to sea seems like a much better option. Louis is the captain of the infamous pirate ship The Rogue and he has a thing for helping defenseless creatures. Especially when they're as pretty as this one.

London is well worth a mass by @dolphinaaaa (93k) | Not Rated

Louis is an Omega prince of France. When he is 13, he is betrothed to Harry of England for politics. The wedding will seal the alliance between the two coutries. This is their story.

Please feel free to check my fic tags if you want to search for other fics! Happy reading, anon!

#anon #answered #fic rec #mpreg fics #mpreg!harry #arranged marriage

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lady-divine-writes · 3 years

Text

The Hitchhiker - Chapter 1/4

Picking up a hitchhiker isn't exactly the dumbest thing Kurt has ever done, but it's not exactly the smartest either. When he comes across Blaine Anderson caught in a sudden downpour, he can't just leave him on the corner to drown... can he? (1756 words)

Read on AO3.

“Excuse me? Sir? Do you need a ride?”

Kurt flashes as confident and honest a smile as he can to the man standing on the side of the road. But the second those words leave his mouth, he hears his father’s voice in his head yelling: “Kurt Hummel! What the hell are you doing? Picking up a hitchhiker? Are you out of your mind!?”

And Kurt has to admit, the voice is right.

There is a fifty-fifty chance that this man, standing alone in the dark by the side of the road, is a violent serial killer. His outfit alone perpetuates the stereotype - indigo jeans, white t-shirt, leather jacket. He has an olive-green duffel slung over one shoulder and he's carrying a guitar case, for God’s sake! What are the odds that there’s actually a guitar in there!? If Kurt picks this man up, he has a greater chance of becoming a statistic than of that man being a musician! Kurt should drive away now without an inch of guilt, floor it without looking back.

And he probably would have deferred to his better judgment and stepped on the gas had it not been for a few things.

It's pitch dark out for a start. Only a handful of street lights line the curb, installed twenty or so feet apart, which creates long expanses of shadow in between. The road they're on is in the middle of nowhere, with trees towering on both sides of them. This doesn’t help Kurt’s argument any since it seems like just the place a killer would lie in wait for a potential victim. But, in that same vein, someone or something could be stalking him, waiting for Kurt to drive away so they can pounce on him from the trees. Then it would be up to the reach of this man's legs and his athletic ability to save him.

This leads directly to reason two: the man is a klutz. In the five minutes Kurt has been stuck at this red light, he’s seen him smack himself in the face with his own bag, drop his sunglasses (pink rimmed Wayfarers, no less), catch them, then fumble them again, and step in the same puddle twice. If this man is a serial killer, he may not be the most competent one on the planet.

Three, just as Kurt’s light turned green, it started raining. And not the light drizzle he has come to expect during his infrequent forays to San Diego, but an honest-to-God downpour. Kurt saw the man turn his face up to the sky, his shoulders slumped, wholly defeated by this new development. He put the butt of his guitar case on the toes of his shoes to keep it out of the mud, then attempted to wrap his jacket around it.

And Kurt’s heart melted.

Kurt is a musician himself. Singer more than musician but he has friends who play the guitar. His stepbrother Finn owns a Fender that he sold plasma to afford. Puck's Gibson is the only thing he has never hawked when he needed money. And Sam, in this man's position, would take off every stitch of clothing to protect his Blueridge if it came down to it. Kurt can imagine this man’s whole life wrapped up in that case, which he is now convinced does hold a guitar.

Kurt isn't a gun enthusiast by any means, but he thinks a semi-automatic should be able to withstand some weather. He may want to Google that one later on… provided he’s still alive.

And about that guitar case: it isn’t a plain, generic, black guitar case. The thing is covered in travel stickers and bling. It has a personality all its own. An easily identifiable personality. If this man is a killer, Kurt is pretty certain every human on the West Coast would know about it. He’d be nicknamed the Kitsch Case Killer or something along those lines. That case sticks out like a sore thumb. There’s no way a man carrying a guitar case decorated like an old-school Lisa Frank binder is getting away with swiping a pack of gum, not to mention murder.

To a lesser degree (Kurt tells himself so he doesn't have to admit how idiotic this idea is), this is the most a-dork-able man Kurt has ever seen. He looks more like a puppy than a predator (weak reasoning, he knows). But Kurt has instincts about people that are usually on the money. He has to give himself credit for making it this far in life. Kurt is tougher than he looks. He has taken his fair share of licks, and he’s still ticking.

Plus, he has bear repellent in the pocket of his jacket the size of a can of Aquanet. He feels he has his bases covered.

The man walks slowly towards Kurt's car, the curls piled atop his head hanging heavily down his cheeks the wetter he gets.

No, Kurt can’t leave him out here.

“Um. Thanks. Thanks a lot,” the man says, cautiously eyeing Kurt up and down as if he may be asking himself Kurt’s same string of questions in his head. “But I… ” The fact that he isn’t jumping at Kurt’s offer, that he’s glancing anxiously down the road, mulling his options even as rain pours down his back, puts Kurt at ease. The man looks like he’s trying to gauge if Kurt might have a weapon hiding somewhere on his person, contemplating if he’ll come out of this alive if he accepts this ride.

Ironic, but that proves that there are two sides to every situation.

The man looks about to step away and decline until a fork of lightning turns night into day for five seconds, a boom so loud following it shakes Kurt’s rental car.

“Sure. Okay. Why not?” He pulls open the rear door in a rush but still wary as he puts his belongings into the backseat and joins Kurt in the front. “Thank you so much. I didn’t expect it to rain this hard, or I might have stayed in my hotel room one more night.” He runs a hand through his hair, cringing at the water that sprays the headrest.

“Not a problem.” Kurt reaches behind the seat and grabs the towel he’d fished out of his luggage earlier when he’d done the same thing. But the rain was only a sprinkle then – angel spittle, his mom would have called it. “I couldn’t just drive by and leave you out here to drown.”

The man chuckles. It, much like the rest of him, is too cute for words. “My name’s Blaine.”

“Kurt.” Kurt extends a hand for Blaine to shake. Blaine looks at it, hesitates a second before taking it, still questioning Kurt and his intentions, Kurt assumes. Despite being stuck in the rain, Blaine’s hand is warm, comforting in a way Kurt speculates a serial killer’s hands would not. “Well, Blaine, where you headed?”

“Oh, uh… I’m trying to make my way to L.A. But you can drop me off anywhere between here and there.”

“Ooo. Actor? Producer?”

“Unemployed schlub, unfortunately. Currently riding my brother’s couch. He’s the actor. I’m the… the failure.”

Kurt pulls onto the road again and heads for the highway. “That’s a really unkind thing to say about yourself.”

“It’s what… well, it’s what my father would say.” He wrings his hands uncomfortably. “He’d also say I’m a disappointment, a waste of a Harvard education, a bum… ” He shivers. Kurt raises the temperature of the heater. Blaine glances at Kurt in embarrassment, and Kurt gets the hint that it’s not the cold that has him trembling.

“I know it’s not my place to say, but I’d stop listening to your father if I were you. It doesn’t seem like he has anything worthwhile to say.”

“How can you say that? You don’t even know me,” Blaine says under his breath, with an edge like a growl, the kind wild animals give when you stumble into their territory unaware. It sets the hairs on the back of Kurt’s neck on end, and he starts second-guessing this decision.

Relax, Kurt. The man’s just beat down. Exhausted. You understand what that’s like.

Blaine sighs, sinking into the passenger seat and leaning his head against the window. "I'm sorry. I know you're trying to be nice. It's been a long day."

“I understand. And I may not know you, but I know fathers," Kurt continues. "A father’s job is to be supportive of their children, no matter what they do in life. Succeed or fail, win or lose, they should always be in your corner. And if he’s not, screw him! Surround yourself with people who want to lift you up, not tear you down.”

Blaine winds his arms around his torso, hugging himself tight. “I---is that the way your father treats you?”

“Yup,” Kurt answers with a subconscious smile at the mention of his dad. “He supports me in everything, even the stuff he doesn’t entirely agree with. And when things don’t work out, he’s the first person there, helping me to my feet and encouraging me to try again.”

“Sounds like a great guy. You’re lucky.”

“He is," Kurt says proudly. "And I am.”

Blaine fixes his gaze to the road ahead as Kurt merges onto the highway. He chews the inside of his cheek, stares too hard at the rain-slick asphalt, not shifting focus. It's as if he can't bring himself to look at Kurt when he asks, “So, you think you’re a good judge of character?”

Kurt nods. “Yes, I do."

"How do you know?"

"Experience. I have a decent track record.”

"Surround yourself with a lot of questionable people, do you?"

"I guess you can say that," Kurt agrees with a laugh, thinking of the people who have come into his life that he has adopted as his own: Rachel, Dave, Santana, Puck, all of them rivals or bullies. Or both. But now, a cherished part of his found family.

People he hopes will miss him if SDPD finds him by the side of the road tomorrow with his throat cut.

Stop it, Kurt! Relax! You're in no danger! Everything is going to be fine!

Blaine shrugs, examining his wet hands as if he’s reading something etched on his skin. “Someday you’ll be wrong.”

“Probably." Kurt meets Blaine's eyes in the reflection of the windshield, flashes his confident smile again. "But I don’t think that day is today.”

#klaine #klaine fic #klaine fanfiction

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charliedawn · 3 years

Text

Imagine being the only angel that still believes in Lucifer's redemption part 2

https://charliedawn.tumblr.com/post/646303435890769920/imagine-being-the-only-angel-that-likes-lucifer 1st part

Lucifer doesn't know what to do..He had woken up to a bunch of children poking him with little sticks, with no sign of you or Gabriel. He had no way to communicate with you and was feeling that the gates of Hell had closed their doors..He couldn't enter. Gabriel had made sure to block all of his usual accesses and even Mazikeen couldn't enter. He sighs loudly out of frustration before joining his hands and looking up, wondering if you could still hear him.

" I don't know if it will work but..I miss you, angel..I know that you thought you were doing good in replacing me, but I..I'm afraid that your decision may have altered things too much. I do not hear the souls of all those who should be suffering in Hell, and I feel empty without you by my side..You don't belong down there. It isn't your cross to bare.."

He takes a drag of his cigaret and let's out a puff of smoke before chuckling bitterly to himself.

" You know..I've noticed something. During your last visit, you said that you loved me at least 3 times..But I never thought about saying it back..In fact, I don't remember ever saying it back..Not once in 50 times you decided to come visit me.."

He seems to freeze for a moment at the realization before hitting his forehead with the palm of his hand, trying to hide his tears from the world as the guilt takes over him.

" I'm such an idiot, angel..You must feel so lost and confused right now.."

He tries to keep his cool, but it is becoming harder and harder. His hands are shaking and he feels the tears welling up at the corner of his eyes. Even his tears sting as he thinks of you, ruling Hell and scared of being caught. The thought only making him grip his hair tightly and groan in frustration. Chloe had tried to cheer him up the best she could, but..

"..She isn't you.."

He finally mumbles to himself and suddenly, his grief turns into rage as he remembers that you had defied him..HIM ! He was supposed to be the one keeping Hell, you had disobeyed his direct order, as if what he had said was of no importance..You are mad..There is no other explanation..

" I won't leave you there ! You hear me ! Can't you see the state in which I am because you're gone ?! My little angel..Your trick won't last long..And then ? What will you do ? Any demon could get their hands on you and..?!"

He closes his eyes and inhales deeply as thousands of thoughts of what those creatures would do to you..He had seen what they were capable of, and many wouldn't bat an eye before dismembering you for their own sadistic pleasure..The thought alone makes him shiver and turn his eyes red.

" If you can hear me, angel. Run. Get out of there. I don't want you to see to which extent this place is depraved, to which extent humans are. I don't want to see the faith you have for them falter..nor your love for me.."

He pauses before admitting that last part, knowing that that was his own selfish desire. He sighs loudly, he needed to get out of here and teleports himself to the nearby beach to take a big inspiration of the salty air and relaxes before continuing with a heavy heart, knowing that it would hurt you if you heard his next words.

" We should have never met, Y/N..I tend to destroy everything that I touch..You were only an innocent little angel and we both knew that, one day, this relationship would lead to something disastrous..I'm so sorry for not having reacted sooner..Dad was right..It would have been better for me to erase all of your memories, instead of keeping the first ones. They only paint a very different version of me..If you come back, I promise to give you everything back. I know that some of the memories will make you hate me, or even feel disgusted..But, that way, you will finally see the monster that you're trying to help.."

He lowers his head and nearly jumps out of his seat when he hears a voice behind him.

" Talking to someone ?"

He turns around swiftly to see you standing there with a small smile playing on your lips.

" Aren't you tired of praying someone that can't hear you ? It's been 5 years, brother..She can't hear you. She's been ignoring my calls as well.."

He only groans in annoyance when he recognizes the condescending voice of his twin and turns towards the counter as fast as he had turned around. But, unlike what he had previously thought, Michael doesn't leave and sits next to him, asking a glass of wine to Mazikeen that first glances at Lucifer for approval, which his finally gives with a slight nod of his head.

" So..What brings you to my charming little establishment, brother?"

Lucifer asks when Michael has his drink, that he gulps in one go to Lucifer's astonishment. Well..So much for the vow of sobriety..

" I know that you know where she is, Lucifer..Even though you won't admit it. An angel can't just disappear without you knowing something about it..I won't ask you where she is, I just wanna know if she's alright?"

Lucifer would have normally made a joke about him becoming attached to you, gladly invited him to leave or ignored him all together..But, surprisingly, he didn't have the will to and he sounded so genuine in his worry that Lucifer has to admit with a loud sigh.

" I don't know, Michael..As you could have guessed, every communication with her has been answered by a deafening silence..Wherever she is, she doesn't want to be found.."

Michael mimics his sigh and, for a moment, the same expression of worry and silent contemplation appear on both their faces as they stare far ahead at an invisible spot in front of them..Angels were archangels charge, not important enough to inform Father himself. But, still..Michael couldn't get you out of his head..Not that angels didn't frequently disappear, either slayed by some demon or wanted to become some guardian angel of Earth..But, this was you they were talking about. You had never left this long before and were too weak to be of any particular interest for any demon..However, that didn't mean he didn't worry about you. Where have you gone to? Knowing that he wouldn't probably find any answer with Lucifer, he decides to stand up and take his leave. However, to his surprise, Lucifer asked as he looks at him with a small mocking smile.

" You know that your an idiot, right?"

Michael frowns in incomprehension and also a bit vexed by Lucifer's insult. Lucifer that picks on his confusion as to what he was talking about, adds while pouring himself another glass of whiskey.

" You've had so many occasions to tell her how you truly felt..But each time, you were too much of a scaredy cat to do anything about it. Even when I was up there, it was so painful to watch. It's funny how we were born with the same face, at the exact same time and place..But, we are so different..I immediately knew what I felt for her the moment our eyes met, and I didn't waste my time like you did.."

Michael doesn't turn around, he only turns his head just enough to catch a glimpse of Lucifer's face when he replies.

" Is that so? Then, tell me, how did that work out for you, brother? She would have done anything for you, and you still find ways to hurt her..How many times must you fall before you realize that she is the only one to have ever truly and unconditionally believed in you?"

Lucifer doesn't respond and Michael doesn't wait for and answer as he walks towards the door..Fools. They were both fools in love with the same damn angel. Unaware to the both of them that someone was spying on their discussion..

" Master ?"

You had been so concentrated on listening to the discussion that you had failed to hear that the demon besides you was talking.

" Mmh?"

You mutter at the end, clearly not interested in whatever he was saying. However, the demon doesn't seem that surprised, Lucifer surely wasn't the most attentive angel after all..

" What do you think we should do with the rest of the murderers on level 4?"

Before you could truly think about the answer, you say out loud.

" Oh..Uh..Forgive them?"

The six eyes of the demon widen at the same time and he quizzically looks at you with confusion.

" My lord?"

The demon seems to not comprehend your demand and you want to face-palm yourself so hard..How did Luci ever managed to know what to do?!

" I mean torture them! Why are you coming to me for that, don't you know how to do your own job? Must I send you in the pit of eternal fire for you to finally understand not to disturb me?!"

If you were being honest? You loved pretending to be Lucifer. He was free and spent most of his time just barking orders on his throne. Since the humans were all sinners down there, nobody cared to do paperwork and everybody was obeying you..While in Heaven, you were just an angel, not a high-ranked one either..The only advantage you had was that power, the power to shapeshift. You usually used it to prank people of joke light-heartedly while mimicking archangel Gabriel when he would come and lecture you..Most of the other angels never understood you, and maybe this is why you had never assigned a higher post in the hierarchy? Not that Gabriel would ever let you become an archangel..You smile at the man that you had learned to consider as a big brother and a friend..It was thanks to him that you had met Luci. One day, as you were welcoming a new soul, a man that you recognized as archangel Michael came to supervise your work. To say that you had been stressed would be a huge understatement. Of course, he couldn't exactly fire you, but you knew that angels could be sent to Hell to take care of the bad souls..or worse. You remember Gabriel telling you that archangels, unlike common angels had the power to "kill" angels, or make them disappear anyway..This is why, you had decided to be on your best behavior that day, however you hadn't counted on Luci being there. You didn't ask when, in the middle of the meeting, Michael had excused himself and left, only to reappear a few moments later with a huge grin..

" So, how's the angel business doing?"

You forced yourself to smile and look back at him to list him a bunch of names you had processed that very day. Many angels did not see the point of your job..However, Luci was different. As soon as you looked up at him, his smile faltered and he frowned, as if he knew that you weren't genuinely smiling.

" Stop that."

He had ordered you and you had looked confused at the time.

" That. Don't smile..You look fake.."

You knew better than disobey an angel's direct command and stopped smiling.

" Does my appearance displease you, archangel Michael ?"

You asked, wondering if it was your face that was not to his taste or your whole appearance in itself ? He shook his head negatively before turning around and sighing.

" I thought you would be more interesting..A shame. From what I heard, you like to think outside of the box and make sure that everybody gets to laugh in Heaven..However, I've been following you since this morning, and you haven't succeeded in making me crack up even once..Care to explain why ?"

His accusative tone caught you by surprise, the great Michael wanted you to..make him laugh? That was unexpected..But, since he asked..A true smirk appears on your face as you think of some human joke that may earn a reaction from the archangel.

" Okay..Let's see..Do you promise not to get mad ?"

He arked an eyebrow, intrigued before smirking.

" Depends.."

Well, here was nothing..You had very few information on mankind and the future..Only Father had this sort of information. However, you all had been given the book of Truth that guided humanity..including the passage which talked about his son falling and being crucified to save humanity..You knew better than to joke about that, but what could you do to try to make the great Michael to laugh?!

" Why doesn't Jesus trust mankind ?"

The eyes of Lucifer widened, he hadn't expected that..

" Why ?"

You looked around, as if you were afraid that someone might hear you before whispering.

"He's afraid he'll get double crossed.."

At first, Luci stayed still, but soon his mouth etched into a grin and his eyes brightened with a certain amount of amusement.

" Ah ! I think that joke nailed it!"

His answer made you blank for a moment, but soon, you felt excited. When you had told your joke to Gab, he had simply sighed in utter despair, quickly reprimanding you on how this was no laughing matter..However, knowing that Michael could understand dark humour was the best surprise you'd had for centuries of existence.

" Listen, I have to go..But, keep up the good work and I'll be sure to check in once or twice.."

You smiled genuinely and nodded vividly, impatient to see him again.

" Ah! Here it is! You have a rather beautiful smile, angel..Try to use this one more often.."

You blushed at the compliment and Lucifer winked at you before walking away. Was that just your imagination or did the archangel Michael gave you a compliment ?! You squealed and let yourself do a little victory dance, interrupted by someone coughing loudly behind you. You turned around to see Michael standing there and blushed even more as he eyed you up and down with an amused smile.

" May I know what inspired that sudden little demonstration of happiness, angel Y/N ?" " You decided to ignore his question and ask teasingly instead.

" Did you perhaps come to hear one or two more of my jokes, archangel Michael ? Couldn't get enough ?"

Suddenly, archangel Michael walked straight towards you and lean in so close that you were starting to wonder if you hadn't made a mistake..He arked an eyebrow at you before replying quizzically.

" Weren't you informed that I was supposed to see you today ? The inspection ?"

Your eyes widened, stammering your answer.

" B..But you already d..did ? No?"

He raised an eyebrow in surprise before sighing loudly, understanding what had happened.

" You must have met my brother..Lucifer can be a little eccentric. Do not mind him. I hope that he wasn't too much of a hassle ?"

You turned around to hide your embarrassment, as you had confused Michael with his brother ! However, Michael didn't seem to really mind and only sighs before looking at the files you had made on the advantages of laughter, which earned you a small smile from him.

" I must admit, we were impressed by your work..Especially, the "twin prank". Me and Lucifer had a lot of fun in trying it on the other archangels..and even Father who laughed when we both started dressing as each other and walking around to see who would recognize us..But, what was the funniest, I must admit, was your own reaction. You created that idea, and yet had trouble recognizing it..Wouldn't that mean that we outsmarted you?"

Michael looks up at you with a mischievous grin and you can't help but smile back. At last, you had found other players among all of the archangels..Lucifer and Michael, huh ? Well played..Well played, gentlemen..

" No..Not at all..It just means that the rematch will be sweeter for me.."

You start shifting to their appearance and take one step towards Michael with a daring smile.

" See, archangel. When you try to prank the prankster, you must always expect the game to go on. Now, good luck to differentiate me to your brother.."Am I him ?" You'll both ask yourselves and I will be enjoying immensely your confusion as you both lose your heads.."

Michael, far from feeling threatened, smiles at you..You were different from the other angels he had ever encountered, that was for sure..He suddenly tookyou by the waist and watched as you blushed intensely. He then lowers his face to whisper in your ear. " I've got other ways to find out if your my brother or not.." You both hear a chuckle behind you and and look at Lucifer, smirking widely as he looked over the both of you. This is how you three had bonded: over a prank. And since then, you had never left their sides..Or at least until Lucifer's great fall..

The scared voice of the demon besides you gets you back to reality.

" No! Of course not my lord! I'm sorry..Please, forgive me..The level 4 is overcrowded and we must find a new place to put the new arrivals. Maybe if your majesty could create more space in this area?"

One of tree things that you had not predicted however is that Lucifer was a being capable of manipulating Hell's pit, as he was the one that had created it. Whereas your power only consisted in copying the physical aspects of a being, not its powers..

" I..I.."

You try to find an excuse, but nothing comes to mind, until a hand puts itself on your shoulder.

" No problem. I'm sure the lord is just feeling a bit lost after his long stay in the pitiful human world.."

You look up to find a demon with half of his face burnt down to a crisp and who looks at you with big green eyes. Somehow, he seemed far more intimidating than the other one and also intelligent as his eyes seem to pierce right through you. You shiver at his devilish smirk and quickly stand up to face him, in order to not make yourself even more suspicious.

" And who are you to tell me if I'm lost or not?! Who even gave you the permission to touch me, hmm?"

The demon suddenly takes a step backwards in surprise and kneels on one knee in front of you, his head lowered in respect.

" My apologies, my king..I didn't think that you would find my gesture so inappropriate. I am Azrath. Your second-in-command and faithful servant.."

Perfect ! You had just gave away that you had no clue that the man in front of you was your second-in-command ! You take a profound breath before taking back your emotionless mask and smile.

" I know who you are, Azrath..Your presence is just unexpected..What are you doing here ?"

The demon stands up again and you suddenly are very aware of how tall he was compared to you..His pale face contrasting with his half eaten half worm-infested chest. You have to look away in order for him not to see your eyes prickled with tears at the stench. Not that Hell smelt good in general, but the throne was so high above everything else that it was bearable, which you couldn't say for the walking corpse next to you..

" I just wanted to see if the rumors were true..You did come back.."

He seems almost disappointed for a second, but quickly composes himself and then gives you something that make your eyes widen as big as saucers..hearts..bloody hearts !

" Also, I took the liberty to gather the fresh hearts of the new arrivals..Just as you like them. Still beating."

Lord..Help me. You could see them moving and it takes all of your self-control not to throw up your own heart at the sight..However, you can feel it beating more widely in your chest..Even though you technically didn't have one, the feeling of pure horror conjured one..You force yourself to smile up at the demon and take the bag, trying your hardest not to look back at them..

" Thank you ! This is...lovely..."

This time, both demons seem to be taken aback by your words and you frown, what have you said this time?! The less intelligent of the two, noticing your confusion, takes it upon himself to answer your silent question.

" My lord..You've never "thanked" anyone before..You even forbid anyone to say it in Hell 1000 years ago.."

You understand and sweat profusely at the realization..The other demon remains silent, but the way he was staring at you suspiciously was enough for you to have doubts as to whether he was starting to understand what was going on..You had to do something, quick. You grit your teeths and yell as loud and as scary as you could.

" I am tired of this! Now, I've been gone for a while and wish to be left alone with my thoughts! Would it be possible or is it too much to ask?!"

Both demons fly away and you let out a sigh of relief. You look around and your eyes fall on a little demon that was flying by, transporting some letters. You frown, wondering what it was doing until you notice that it is going towards the gates. It must be a messenger! You summon paper and start writing a letter to Gabriel and call the little demon.

" You ! Send this to archangel Gabriel !"

The little she-demon quivers in fear, but doesn't dare refuse and takes the letter to the only communication link between Hell and Heaven. The tall and lanky skeleton that had talked to you earlier was sure to become a problem..He was far too smart for his own good..You would have to find a way to make him believe you somehow..You sigh loudly in frustration before running you hand through your...his hair..Suddenly, you smell something rotten just behind you and don't have the time to turn around before a dark chuckle sounds nears your ear.

" Archangel Gabriel, huh ?"

Your eyes widen and when you turn around, you find yourself in front of the same clever demon from earlier. His eyes seem brighter somehow and he is covered in..You have to muffle your mouth not to let out a scream or even vomit at the guts hanging from his shoulders and limbs..Oh my Goodness..The demon seems to perceive your uneasiness and hangs his head on one side, wondering what was wrong..You close your eyes and, after a few minute, open them again to see the monster actually smirking mockingly at you.

" What is the matter, Lucifer ? Did the human world affect you so much that you can't even stomach the sight of blood anymore ?"

He laughs at your horrified expression and suddenly takes you by the arm to yank you harshly forward, making you nearly fall from the throne.

" What are you doing?! Unhand me!"

You scream, but he only does a crooked smile before asking, almost expectantly.

" Aren't you going to use your wings, "my lord"?"

The way he had mockingly pronounced the two last words make you quickly understant that he was on to your masquerade and you glare at him.

" I won't let a pitiful demon like you intimidate me..I am your king and I am to he respected as such!"

However, far from feeling threatened, the demon only gets out something that you had forgotten about..the sword of Lucifer..

" The sword of Hell..Only demons or lord Lucifer can wield it..If any other etheral being were to try to use it, they would fall to the core of Hell to burn there for the rest of eternity..And one of the only weapons capable to kill even angels..Now, tell me..Still going to pretend to be our great master?"

You know that what he is saying is true..The sword is as sharp and bloody as it was the day Lucifer got rejected from Heaven..You didn't know what to do, so you admit reluctantly.

" I am angel Y/N, caretaker of humans joy and laughter of sector 45."

You were sure that he would pierce your body with the sword as soon as he would know, but the pain never comes and you open your eyes to see that the demon was now facing you. His wide green eyes were dancing around their sockets and his smile goes from ear to ear, showing his sharp and yellow teeths. He runs his tongue over them and has something in his eyes that makes you shiver in fear..hunger. He eyes you up and down and laughs darkly as you try to get away from him. However, you slip and fall. Not having any choice, you open your wings and all of the demons turn their heads towards you, the blinding light catching their attention. As soon as they see you, they all screech or roar in your direction and fly up in the sky to attack you. You start flying towards the gates, followed closely by waves of demons and Azrath that yells at the guards to cut the entrance. The two huge demons at the doors try to catch you with their bare hands, as if you were some kind of mosquitoe and you have to do multiple spins in the air to escape them. You know that their must be an entrance somewhere since the little demon messengers were able to pass. However, you didn't plan on the said entrance to be tiny orifices, big enough for the little demons to go through, but not you. You turn around to see the wave of demons coming closer..Well, looks like Luci was right..You hadn't totally thought that through..You would probably die here. You close your eyes and smile. At least, you had bought some time for Lucifer to live as he wanted among the humans for 5 whole years..However, suddenly, you feel a hand around your wrist. You open your eyes to see Azrath, dragging you towards the gates where he gets out the sword of Lucifer and cuts you with it. The burn is insufferable and you scream in pain as Azrath forces you to put your injured hand against the door.

" What are you doing?!"

You scream incredulously at his strange behavior, but he only lets out a spine-chilling groan before answering you.

" My great escape, sweetheart ! And if you want to leave, I would advise you to do as I say and shut up!"

You open your eyes wide as he starts pushing against the door, trying to get it open. You look behind you and see the demons flying in circle in the sky, wondering what their boss was doing..

" W..Why are you doing this?!"

You finally ask and, just as the door starts bulging, he answers you with terrifying smirk.

" I'm going to get back Lucifer..I've had more than enough of this place and I'm sure that if he is so reluctant to come home..then that means the human world must be a very nice place. Now, are you going to stay here with the nice little other flying monstrosities, or are you going to follow me, angel Y/N?"

He extends his hand towards you and look back at the screaming harpies and horned devils flying above your heads. You finally sigh and take his hand. As soon as your hand in his, his grin only widens and he runs outside, followed by you. You close your eyes and try to communicate with Lucifer.

" I'm sorry, Lucifer..I've failed."

On Earth, Lucifer was sitting besides Trixie that had grown into quite the young lady, as you had predicted..He finds himself smiling as the door opens and he sees Chloe come in with a loud sigh.

" Today was absolutely crazy at work..There has been some calls all over the cities..missing cats. Can you believe it?! Cats?! What are we?! The Cat Police?!"

The girl and Lucifer look up at her from the sofa while Chloe arks an eyebrow at them.

" What?"

They both look at each other with a serious expression, both nodding understandingly at each other and smile widely before looking back at Chloe with their hands joined together in a gun shape.

" You are under catrest !"

" Paws where I can see them, detective !"

They both yell at the same time and Chloe snorts..Of course those two would do cat puns..typical. However, she acts her part and raises her hands in the air.

" Oh no! You got me!"

They all smile, all the sion having left the room..But then, a loud caught catches their attention.

" Sorry to interrupt this..whatever this is..But, I must talk to Lucifer."

Here was Gabriel, in their living room..after 5 years of absence and Lucifer's smile automatically goes downwards as his eyes take a bright red tint. Chloe, sensing the danger, urges Trixie to go in her room. As soon as the girl is upstairs, Lucifer is quick to react and jumps on Gab to choke the angel.

" You! How dare you show your face again?!"

He shouts angrily, his eyes flashing a bright red. It takes Chloe to grab him by the shirt to yank him off the angel that stands up again to answer him between each pant.

" It's..It's Y/N..I..I made a mistake.."

Lucifer growls at him and responds sarcastically.

" You think?!"

The etheral being looks up at Lucifer with, for the first time in ages, an apologetic glance.

" It wasn't meant to last that long..You were supposed to get back down there a year later..But, she closed the gates, Lucifer. I couldn't come in myself. She closed the gates to anyone but the souls and now, I'm afraid that she may be in trouble, because of me."

Lucifer, far from feeling any compassion towards the angel, is bewildered by his apology and smiles in astonishment at his brother's admittance.

" Oh well..My heart bleeds for you, Gab..It really does. Not even recognizing your own brother must be terrible.."

Lucifer doesn't wait for an answer before pushing Chloe to the side on the sofa before punching Gabriel in the nose. Gabriel stumbles back with the force of the impact and raises his hand in surrender and repeats.

"I know that you are angry, brother..But, I'm not joking, Lucifer. She's in trouble."

Lucifer, astonished by the nerve of this angel that dared come to him for help, can't help but replying ironically.

" Oh! You're not joking?! Well good..Because neither am I !"

His eyes lighten up in orange and he nearly growls at Gab that gets out the letter you had send him to extend it towards Lucifer.

" She wrote me this..One of the demons is on to her..And, as I said earlier, I can't go in there. Not only did she close the doors, but you know as well as I do that I can't go in there without Father's permission.."

Lucifer snickers at Gabriel's pathetic excuse and shakes his head.

" No. I am not going to read that. Fuck off. She chose to disobey..She chose to replace me and she told me herself! She finds my job "extremely complaisant and entertaining". Even if I were to go there, she wouldn't want my help..Plus, as you said, she closed the gates! Only the spirits are allowed in..How do you suppose I get in?!"

However, it's Chloe that reacts first and grabs the letter out of Gab's hands to give it to Lucifer with resolution.

" Open it, Lucifer. You still are the king of Hell! Act like it!"

His eyes widen at Chloe's sudden agressive reply and his voice softens as he looks down at the woman and finally opens the letter to read it.

" Gabriel, my brother and my friend..It has been 5 years now that I've sealed the gates of Hell. I know you must be pretty furious, as our deal ended 4 years ago..However, I couldn't deny Lucifer of his happiness. I know that you can't understand my decision, nor why I did it..But, it's not that bad. I succeeded in blending in among the demons. I think Lucifer would be proud. However, I wanted to know if you could please enlighten me on one of the demons that just arrived in Hell. His name is.."

Lucifer's eyes widen at the familiar name and he looks up at Gabriel with shock..The name of his second-in-command was written on there, but he had deserted eons ago..Why come back now? It didn't make any sense, unless..His jaw clench and he fixes the letter intensely..Unless he had found his sword..as he had asked of him..And if it was the case, then his little angel had some serious problems on her hands..However, before he could voice his concern, he feels a vivid pain in his chest that cuts his breath off..He can feel that you're in danger somehow..But how to find you?! He groans in agony, trying to think of how to find you..until he remembers that there had been mysterious disappearances of cats in the neighborhood. He looks up at Chloe that is by his side, supporting him as he doubles on the floor in pain.

" The..cats.."

He tries to utter, but Chloe doesn't understand and leans in to have a better hearing.

" The cats..Where were they going? Where did the largest number disappear?"

" Around the old church..Why?"

He looks at Gab that instantly understands and nods before disappearing. Asrath was also known as the master of cats, this is why it had been easier for him to search for the sword undetected..He just had to believe that Gab would arrive in time. Chloe frowns at him and asks, bewildered.

" Well?! Are you going to stay there?? Go save her !"

He looks up at her with widened eyes, astonished that she would ever suggest it.

" I can't..I can't leave you, Chloe.."

Chloe takes a big breath before looking up at Lucifer with a small sad smile and caressing his cheek tenderly.

" Go, Lucifer..She needs you. We'll be fine.."

He finally nods and smiles up at her before kissing her on the forehead.

" I love you.."

She smiles with tears in her eyes and forces herself to nod.

" I know.."

And with that confirmation, Lucifer disappears as well, appearing near the old church and the pain worsens with every step he takes. When he enters the said church, it is filled with cats and he sees Gab, fighting Azrath. He looks around to spot you huddled near the cross, your face hidden behind your Y/C hair and then..he sees the blood. You were bleeding from your upper arm and he sees red. His body feels hot and overwhelmed by a new-found energy. He looks up at Azrath that was handling HIS sword against Gabriel that was struggling with fighting back. He walks towards them and as soon as Azrath notices him, he smirks and gets rid of Gabriel by throwing him against the cross that breaks in two. Gab wants to get up, but he feels a pain to his side and sees that Azrath had succeeded in wounding him..In normal circumstances, his wound would close itself immediately. However, this mighty weapon was one conceived especially to kill archangels, and Lucifer had made it with his own hands..The wound would take longer to heal and he felt himself fall unconscious. You whimper and try to help Gab by applying pressure on the bleeding wound, but Azrath notices you and stops you. You back away in fear, your wide eyes full of terror and Lucifer then sees why he had felt your pain..Azrath had carved an upside-down cross on your forehead, sending him a direct invitation..His blood is boiling in his veins as he sees what the vile creature had done to his poor angel, while Azrath seems proud of himself as he takes you by the hair and yanks you forward so you fall to your knees at his feet. It takes you a few minutes to look up, but when you do, his heart stops. In your eyes, the innocence and joy were gone..replaced by unbidden fear. He tries to help you up, but you scurry backwards and his eyes prickle with tears, as you were now afraid of even him.

" Oh..angel.."

He utters apologetically at you before glaring up at Azrath that frowns in incomprehension.

" Why are you looking at me like that?! She's an angel!"

He stands up and Azrath takes a step back as he senses the radiating rage of Lucifer that walks calmly towards him and extends his hand towards him expectantly.

" The sword. Give me the sword."

Azrath takes back his blank expression and shakes his head negatively before looking at the bloody sword in his hands.

" I'm sorry, Master..But you know I can't do that..You need to come back with me. Your kingdom needs you and this sword is the only thing hat can force you to come back.."

Lucifer sighs, knowing that he wouldn't give him without a fight. He suddenly tries to surprise him by sending him a punch, but Azrath, having premeditated it, uses the sword as a shield. But Lucifer, far from being bothered, takes the sword with his bare hands before kicking Azrath backwards. Azrath growls at him, showing his sharp teeths and snake-like tongue. He hisses, his voice dripping with venom.

" You really are going to fight me for her?! She's only an angel! The enemy!"

Lucifer glances back at you and smiles reassuringly at you before looking back at Azrath with eyes glowing in the dark.

" No.."

Azrath seems to be relieved by his answer, but it quickly fades out when Lucifer takes his original form and shouts between gritted teeths.

"..I'm going to kill you!"

Lucifer couldn't just control Azrath, he was too powerful for that..and had always been by his side since his great fall. Azrath closes his eyes and inhales deeply before looking up at Lucifer with his bright green eyes in which his pupils turn to slits and raises his hands in the air.

" As you wish, Master..Know that I never wanted this.."

Suddenly, the cats surround him and cover him from head to toe, melting into a sort of black armor. The great armor of Azrath. Great..Lucifer cracks his head to the side and grins up at his ex second-in-command.

" Always the attention seeker, aren't you Azrath?"

Azrath would have only ignored his comment normally, but this time, his comment earns him a slight chuckle, knowing that one of them would die tonight.

" You know me, Lucifer..I guess I took some things from you.."

After this exchange of ironic comebacks, they both become serious and in a flash, they are both at each other's throats. Azrath bites his shoulder hard and Lucifer slashes his face. Both of them are panting, but in their eyes the same fire burning bright..Suddenly, someone crashes inside through the window and interposes himself between the two demons.

" What is going on here?! What are you two doing here?! Hell is chaos and I find you both here?!"

Michael booms in obvious discontent, not having noticed the sword in Azrath's hands yet..Azrath takes it as an opportunity and raises his sword to strike him down.

" This is for you, Lucifer!"

He brings it down, but you use your last strength to stand up and stand in front of Michael. The three men are shocked and Michael is the first to react, he gets out his lance and decapitates Azrath in one swift blow. As for Lucifer, he quickly kneels besides you and takes you in his arms. He looks at his hand in horror, recognizing the smell and color of blood. He shakes you, trying to wake you up while crying out loud.

" No. No! No! No! Angel! Stay with me! You hear me?! Stay with me!"

He sobs and gets the hair out of your face, cradling your face kissing your face over and over again, hoping for your (Y/C) eyes to open again..Michael, after having made sure that Gabriel was alright, turns towards you and, for the first time in forever, feels tears prickle in his eyes at the realization. He falls to his knees by your side and gently pets the top of your head. He then looks up at the sky and asks for a miracle, begging his Father to bring you back..

" Dad! Please! Do not punish her even more! Please, bring her back!"

But his prayers are unanswered and the only one who seems to be affected by his words is Gab that gasps loudly as he wakes up. He looks at his wound and smiles as he sees that there is nothing left..However, when he sees your cold body on the ground, his smile turns into a pained grimace, his whole face twisting in sadness.

" Why? She saved Michael..She saved your son!"

Lucifer shouts, his eyes pointed towards the sky, not expecting an answer.

" Because, this is Michael's punition.."

They all look towards the direction of the voice, their eyes widening as they see Gab, his kind eyes looking above all of them with a numb stare, having finally understood why Father hadn't said or done anything.

" Michael, you really thought Y/N wouldn't know how you felt ? Your jealousy of your own brother..Jealousy that only grew to win the love of one being and threatened to destroy Heaven and Hell..The very same being that only wished for you two to be happy..She tried to make things right and replace you, Lucifer..Father gave her what she wanted, and what you both feared more than anything..She knew the price, but she asked HIM for your salvation and redemption."

Lucifer and Michael both stand up at the same time and open their mouths to voice their disapproval and utter outrage when Gabriel interrupts them, wanting only one thing now.

" Let's go home.."

He takes your body and looks at both brothers with tearful eyes.

" I hope you will be able to appreciate the second chance she has just both given you..You are both free."

And with those last words, he flies up with your body in his arms. Lucifer and Michael both look at each other and, without them knowing why, they both start tearing up. However, Lucifer forces himself to talk through his sobs.

" We can't..We can't leave her..She didn't deserve this..I know what punishment looks like, and she didn't deserve this! She didn't deserve to be sacrificed for our sakes!"

Michael, for once, agrees with his brother and extends his hand towards his brother.

" I know we had our differences in the past, brother..But, we need to show Dad that we are more! That we can be more than just hateful beings, if we want her back..Are you with me?"

Lucifer nods, and for the first in the History of the World, the Good and the Bad were to become allies in order to save you..

You open your eyes wide and straighten up to look around you, frowning in confusion at your surroundings. You were in the middle of a luxuriant forest with tall trees and bright purple fruits..Where are you? And most of all, how are you alive?! You look at your stomach to see that your wound has completely disappeared.

" How are you, my darling?"

You look up with astonishment as you see a tall woman with a bright green dress making her way to you. Her smile and welcoming expression make you think that she is not a threat, but you still have to ask.

" Hum..Thank you for saving me but, who are you? And where am I?"

She only chuckles at your question, as if it was the funniest joke.

" I'm sorry, my dear..Those are very good questions but, it's been a while since I've got some company so..hearing another human voice is quite exciting.."

You don't reply, waiting for her to answer your questions, which she does and you whiten at her answers.

" My name is Lilith..And this is my prison. I would say that it is the garden..but I've been locked up in here for so long that I can't remember much."

You had heard about Lilith, the first woman, the mistake, the mother of monsters..She had died so many millenias ago. And if you were with her, then that only meant one thing..

" Welcome to the Other Place! The place where angels and demons come when they die ! Of course, as not many angels or demons truly die..They stay here until Father needs them again..Come. You're the first one to get here since a few centuries..I'm sure you've got many stories to share."

Lilith extends her hands towards you with a wide smile and you look at her hand hesitantly for a few seconds before finally taking it with a small sigh.

" Yes. I guess I do.."

#lucifer morningstar #lucifer morningstar x reader #netflix #fandoms #michael

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octopisunsets · 3 years

Text

Lan Xichen is a hypocrite

Disclaimer: I like Lan Xichen. I like his character, I like writing him. This is not in any way a 'why you shouldn't like X character' break down. It's born of a frustration with the fandom where they are completely unable to look Lan Xichen's sins in the face

If you are going to comment on how I'm 'obviously wrong' or try to argue with me, save your time and energy. I've gone around and around with other people about this before, and you will NOT change my mind.

That said...

Lan Xichen is a hypocrite. He's complacent, and naive to a terrible fault, and holds double standards that blow my mind.

The most grievous of sins is:

He allowed Lan Wangji to be whipped.

People have tried to claim 'oh, well the elders demanded it!' Lan Xichen is sect leader. While the elders have a strong influence Lan Xichen is sect leader. If he said no, then the answer would have been no.

Instead, he bowed to pressure and stood back while his little brother, the person he claims to love the most, was nearly whipped to death.

Need I remind you that Lan Wangji did not even critically injure the elders? He injured them only enough to stop them from attacking Wei Wuxian. None of them died. All of them recovered quickly. They chose to attack, they chose to stand in front of Lan Wangji with their swords and lead the assault. They caused their own injuries, but they laid the blame at Lan Wangji's feet.

And Lan Xichen allowed them to.

Worse still - Lan Xichen had the AUDACITY to blame Wei Wuxian for Lan Wangji's whipping, seclusion, and scarring. As if it was Wei Wuxian's fault that Lan Wangji fell in love with him, as if it was Wei Wuxian that took the whip to his back.

Lan Xichen, who stood aside and watched Lan Wangji get whipped, then turned around and told Wei Wuxian 'this is your fault'. Wei Wuxian, who already shouldered the blame of countless things that weren't his fault, who felt guilt for things he had no control over. Lan Xichen looked Wei Wuxian in the eye and handed him another burden to carry that didn't belong to him. The burden that rightfully belongs to Lan Xichen. He is at fault for Lan Wangji's whipping.

As if he wasn't complacent in Wei Wuxian's 'downfall'. For a sect about justice and doing good, Lan Xichen sure didn't do shit when the rest of the sects were bad mouthing Wei Wuxian. You're telling me Lan Wangji went to Burial Mounds, saw all the old people and the literal child, and didn't tell Lan Xichen that there was no army? No hoard of demonic cultivators? Bullshit. Lan Xichen knew it was full of non combatants. And he did nothing.

For a man that stood there and demanded Jin Guangyao face justice, he did NOTHING when Wei Wuxian was facing a hateful mass of people. He stood right beside the other sect leaders and cursed his name, swore to besiege a mountain of innocent people after he stood back and watched an innocent woman be murdered for a sin she did not commit. Knowing! Knowing! That they had promised to leave Burial Mounds alone if Wen Qing and Wen Ning turned themselves in.

Lan Xichen did not stand up for what was right. He didn't resist. Because it was easier to comply. Because it was easier to blame Wei Wuxian for everything and never face his own moral failings.

Lan Xichen is a hypocrite and just as bad as the rest of the cultivation world that condemned Wei Wuxian. Then he allowed his little brother to be so severely punished he hovered at the point of death.

And blamed Wei Wuxian, when it was his hand and his hand alone that could have stopped that whip.

Stop treating Lan Xichen like he is some paragon of innocence. He was a victim of Jin Guangyao's manipulations, yes. But he is also a weak willed hypocrite.

#mo dao zu shi #mdzs

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thiswaycomessomethingwicked · 3 years

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What do you think Grima and Eomer are most scared of? Apart from being left alone with each other, of course :) I think Eomer is terrified of spiders - he has to ask Eowyn to remove them. Grima's fears are probably grander and more philosophical e.g. non-existence, failure, imperfection. But I bet he's terrified of weird stuff as well - exposed knees, clowns, steep stairs...

Oooooooh I love this question!! (granted I love any and all questions about these two)

[Oh god this got so long, I’m sorry but also not sorry.]

So I mean, it would depend what kind of fear we’re talking about.

In terms of day-to-day fears/things that spook you or creep you out. I think Eomer has a REAL problem with house (mead hall?) centipedes.

‘Too many legs, Grima. They have too many legs. I did not sign up for this.’

Once. when Eomer was like 10, he woke up with a house centipede on his chest and he’s never recovered.

Grima just shoos the critter outside. Eowyn lectures her brother about their importance in the grand ecosystem. Eomer doesn’t care.

Like when Eomer sees a house centipede all the hair on his body stands on end and he feels that cold wash of terror. I mean, if he had to, he could deal with it himself. But he’d be internally screaming the entire time. Stoic externally, of course. He is a brave rider of Rohan! But inside? Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I think Grima gets creeped out by uncanny valley things. Mostly dolls. I think he assumes 90% of all dolls are cursed. One time his niece left her doll behind and Grima had to lock it in a box and hide it in a storage room and he was still a little convinced that it was going to escape and murder them all. Chucky style.

Eomer: I want to get my sister a doll for the baby she and Faramir are about to have. How about this one?

Grima: W h y would you traumatize a baby like that Eomer? Are you a monster?

Eomer: This .... this is a cute doll. It’s not going to haunt them.

Grima: You don’t know that for certain. Look at those beady eyes. Always watching.

Eomer: Ghosts and draugr are fine but not dolls?

Grima: My undead brother might be a pain in the arse but at least I know what to expect from him. Mostly his trying to eat people. But it’s within the bounds of reason. That fucking doll on the other hand? Who knows what it thinks in the dark hours of the night. Who knows what secrets it holds in its heart.

Eomer: . . .I think I’ll just get the kid a stuffed animal horse.

Grima: Much better.

I also think Grima gets easily spooked by flying insects. Like once he ascertains that the sudden movement within his line of vision isn’t going to hurt him, he’s fine. But his initial reaction is to get up and leave very quickly and let Eomer deal with it. Grima has a strong association between sudden movements and getting punched. Reasonable, really.

Shared thing? I think Eomer and Grima both find teeth to be really creepy.

Eowyn: They’re just bones in your mouth. It’s fine.

Grima: MOUTH BONES??? DON’T CALL THEM THAT.

Eowyn: Mouth! Bones! Mouth! Bones!

Eomer: I hate all of this.

Eowyn: Mouth bonessssss!

Eomer shows up in Osgiliath, hasn’t seen Eowyn in like two years, she gives him a hug and whispers ‘mouth bones’ into his ear just to freak him out. Because they’re loving and caring siblings like that.

Eowyn: My daughter is just starting to get her mouth bones in.

Grima: I refuse to engage with this.

Faramir: Babe, why are you like this??

Eomer: I brought this doll for her.

Eowyn: That is so cursed, I’m surprised Grima let you buy it.

Eomer: I don’t know, I think it’s kind of cute.

Eowyn: hmmmm yeah well you’re sleeping with that thing over there so I don’t know that your judgement can be trusted.

Grima: h e y.

Faramir: What kind of family did I marry into??

Now, for deeper fears.

Eomer is the one who has a deep seated fear of failure. Of not living up to the expectations set on him from a very young age. Both as son of Eomund, who is like local hero 101, and as nephew to the king. Being orphaned at a young age, I suspect he had a lot of pressure placed on him to Be the Man in the Family. To Take Care Of Everyone etc.

And it’s hard being the son of someone who has a bit of a legend around them when they’re alive, let alone when they’re dead and so they become an impossible standard to live up to.

This isn’t to say Eomer is a stick in the mud and doesn’t get up to mischief. This is the man who drops sick burns for a living and can be described as “compulsively truculent”. Like, Eomer at 18 was absolutely a bit of a mad lad. But, there was always this fear and anxiety hanging over him of having to live up to great expectations - most of which he’s placed on himself but he’s not aware of that.

Later, I’ve always headcanon-ed that he does a bit of that daft thing of comparing himself to Aragorn and is like “I’m not living up to the story book legend who rules the neighbouring kingdom” and despairs.

Eowyn: You’re doing fine. And really, Boromir and Arwen run 80% of everything. Aragorn disappears into the mountains at any given moment.

Eomer: But what if I’m somehow failing everything at all times? Have you thought about that? That I’m failing our parents and ruining our father’s legacy and destroying our uncle’s trust in me??

Eowyn: . . . yeah that’s not happening. You’re fine.

Eomer: BUT AM I???

Eowyn awkwardly pats his hand, ‘You’re fine.’ Eomer despairs.

Grima: Can’t do worse than me.

Eowyn: Yeah! You can’t do worse than Grima.

Eomer: That bar is so low it’s underground.

Additional to this, I think Eomer is scared of letting things go - like giving up control in situations. Because he’s got it into his head that so long as he is in control he can keep everyone safe and no one will die (i.e. his sister). And he’s terrified of things heading down the Road of Chaos.

Which like, Eomer, good luck with that. You live in Middle Earth and Grima’s still around being the agent of chaos that he is.

Grima: I’ve had a thought.

Eomer: Oh no. Put it back where you found it.

Grima: Too late, I’ve told Eothain and he thinks it’s great.

Eomer: Gods preserve me.

Eothain: Ok but hear us out --

For Grima - he’s got a long of weird, existential fears. The World Ending being the biggest of them. He’s got a bit of a nihilistic, hopeless streak in him that can get quite philosophical in terms of dread.

But for more personal, grounded fears, I think the main one is that he’s terrified of being seen. Of being vulnerable. Because if people see him/know him, surely they’ll hate him and leave him and that would hurt so, so much. Therefore, if he’s mean to everyone, including himself, then people can’t hurt him because he’s already doing their work for them to himself.

Yet, he’s also afraid of being alone and so desperately wants to love and be loved but doesn’t know how to go about making that happen in a healthy, normal manner. So he self-sabotages. Tells himself things like, “I was not a lovable child, and I’d grown into a deeply unlovable adult. Draw a picture of my soul and it’d be a scribble with fangs.” - Gillian Flynn

This just creates a fucked up freeze/thaw cycle of “I want to fit in and belong somewhere, but if people know me they’ll see what an ugly thing I am, better that they don’t know me, so let me shut them out/be mean to them etc., no one cares for me because I am unworthy of it, this hurts a lot, and I think fitting in and belonging would probably stop it hurting, but if people know me they’ll see what an ugly thing I am, better they don’t ... so on and so forth.”

So yeah. His deep seated fears of being vulnerable + being along make for some twisted thinking and lots of self-sabotaging.

Grima; What is emotional vulnerability?? Never heard of it.

Theoden: You could give it a try, you know.

Grima: No. I refuse.

Grima does that thing that Carrie Fisher talks about: “Of all the violence I have known in my life, I have not known violence like the way I talk to myself.”

Thank you so much for the ask! This was an absolute blast to answer. I loved every minute of it.

I love all Grima and Eomer questions.

<3 <3

#Grima Wormtongue #Eomer #ask #anon #reply #LOTR #lord of the rings #lotr headcanons #Grima is scared of everything except things he should be scared of

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laineystein · 3 years

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I made this post because my typical anxiety over 9/11 is overwhelming this year. I don’t know why it feels so raw. I mean…I have my guesses but none of that really matters. Some people seemed to take issue with the post. Some people on this website weren’t even alive when it happened and most of you, if you were, likely didn’t experience it firsthand. But some of us did. I did.

I grew up in Brooklyn, NY. On October 8, 2001, my uncle and his wife were in town visiting from Israel. We went to Windows on the World which at the time was this very fancy restaurant at the top of the North WTC tower. It had a panoramic view of Manhattan with Jersey and my neighborhood in Brooklyn in the distance. That day it was so cloudy that we couldn’t see anything. I don’t remember much; I thought it was odd that my parents allowed me, an 11 year old, to come to this fancy restaurant. What was even more bizarre was the sweet lady in the bathroom whose job was to stand there all day and offer hand towels to patrons after they washed their hands. It was all just a very surreal experience — and this was before I knew what would happen only a month later.

On September 11, 2001 I was in yeshiva. Math class. A teacher showed up at our door and walked right in, interrupting my teacher in the middle of her lesson. They stepped out into the hall. Before my teacher had even come back into the room there was an announcement over the intercom saying we were going into lockdown. Let me preface this with: yeshivas get death threats and bomb threats often. We were practicing lockdown drills long before Columbine and 9/11. This is part of being a Jew. As an Israeli Jew, I knew it all too well. Unlike most of my fellow students, lockdowns were common place. At 11 I’d spent a collective of 50+ hours in mamad (bomb shelters) back in Israel…at least of what I could remember. But we didn’t know what was going on. We figured it was just a threat, that the police would come and do their usual sweep, and then we’d return to our lessons. But that didn’t happen. We stayed in the safe rooms for hours. Then, we were told to quickly and quietly return to our classrooms to collect our belongings. We were going to go to the gymnasium and wait for our parents to pick us up. We still had no idea what was going on.

Both of my parents worked in Manhattan at the time: my father in the village and my mother in midtown. Some students were picked up right away. My brothers and I were not. We weren’t alone. There were probably about 30 of us that didn’t have parents show up. Again, we had absolutely no idea what was going on but we knew at that point that something wasn’t right.

The teachers scrambled, doing their best to appear calm while they made phone calls and talked amongst themselves. At one point most of them left and it was just us and our principal. In true Jew fashion we read Torah and passed the time learning. Eventually all of the teachers returned and we were split up - unnervingly, my brothers and I were in different groups. They explained that there had been an accident in the city that made travel difficult so instead of making us wait for our parents to pick us up, they’d arranged for us to go to the homes of our classmates. My brothers and I were split up because they were going to a male classmate’s home and I, a female, was going to my best friend’s house. That was comforting. It was comforting until we left school and walked to one of my teacher’s cars. The sky looked different. Everything felt *off*. Across the river was a scene of pure chaos and we still didn’t understand the magnitude of things.

My best friend’s mother met me at the door with a warm smile. If she knew what had happened (I know now that she did), she hid it well. She welcomed me inside and then shut the door, the teacher and her standing on the stoop talking in hushed tones while I walked with my best friend toward her room. Her mother came back in the house and checked on us. She shut my best friend’s bedroom door behind her - a weird occurrence, to say the least. We finished homework and then sat around eating snacks and chatting. We heard the door downstairs signaling that my best friend’s father was home. With his presence, shadows moving behind the door, all of them talking in hushed tones. It was my best friend’s brother speaking with his father. The deeper tones of their voices made it easier for us to make out what they were saying but it still wasn’t much: tragedy, airplane, towers.

At dinner things seemed normal. All the while I was panicking, not understanding why my parents had yet to come pick me up and take me home. After dinner it was baths and bedtime for the younger kids. My best friend and I thought we were so cool being allowed to have a sleepover on a school night. We snuck down to the kitchen for more snacks. In the living room was her parents and brother. We stood outside the room eavesdropping. They were watching American news…so it was in English. That enough put us on alert (we all had special tv packages back then that broadcasted Israeli channels, ie. everything was usually in Hebrew). We waited and listened. I couldn’t help myself. I walked right into the room and sat down on the couch next to my best friend’s brother. I don’t think their parents knew what to make of it. My best friend joined me and at 11 years old we watched as the news continuously played footage of the planes hitting the towers and the absolutely horrific photos and footage captured afterward of New Yorkers scrambling, running, crying . Aside from the TV, it was silent. All of Brooklyn felt silent. The usual street noise failed to exist. It was as if that television was the only sound in the world.

I panicked then. All at once. I realized what this meant. My parents didn’t work in lower Manhattan but they did both work in the city. Why hadn’t they at least called? There were still so many unanswered questions about the attacks that I as an 11 year old couldn’t possibly understand. At the time they still didn’t know who had orchestrated the attacks and without that information they couldn’t figure out why. That night we watched the Presidential address. We got some answers. I still couldn’t believe that my best friend’s parents were allowing us to stay. Brooklyn was still quiet. I still didn’t know where my parents were and I started to wonder if they were dead. At one point, for a few minutes I accepted that they were. That didn’t hit me until the television was turned off.

We were ordered off to bed. My best friend seemed so relieved and she jumped off the couch and bounded up the stairs. I moved much more slowly, her brother trudging behind me. At the landing he grabbed for my wrist to stop me. Now, mind you, this is a modox household - any physical contact between unrelated girls and boys is prohibited. I turned to look at him and he asked if I was alright. I was crying but I don’t remember that (he told me years later). He hugged me. I don’t know how long it lasted. I didn’t think about the ramifications of what we were doing. I just thought of my parents. He walked me to his sister’s room and just smiled before disappearing into his own.

School was cancelled the next day. My best friend’s father didn’t go to work. We now knew how unreal all of this was but the younger kids in the house had no idea. I was jealous of them. Their parents were home and safe. I still didn’t know where mine were or if they were alive.

My best friend’s mother handed me the phone after breakfast. It was my eldest brother. They were fine. He knew what had happened but my two younger brothers did not. The call was brief. I didn’t have to ask; he just figured our parents were dead too.

If you weren’t alive and especially if you weren’t in New York during the attacks, you can’t possibly understand how much was unknown. The attacks had completely obliterated any semblance of order in Manhattan. One of the city’s largest cell towers was on top of WTC so when the towers fell, with it went the cell service. Trains were shut down. Cabs weren’t running. Landlines were clogged, reserved for emergency personnel. There are photos of New Yorkers running across the Brooklyn Bridge to just get out of the city. So many of these people lived in the Bronx or Queens (other way) but the goal was to just be away from lower Manhattan. Everyone and everything was displaced.

When you’re 11 you don’t reason that your parents found friends to stay with and would call and get home as soon as they could. At 31 I still can’t comprehend how people could hate other people so much that it made sense to commit mass murder in such a horrific way…so it certainly didn’t make sense to me then.

September 11th was a Tuesday. I didn’t hear from my father until the afternoon of September 12th. I didn’t get back to our house until that Wednesday night and then it was a waiting game of wondering where my mother was. We heard from her finally on Thursday morning. She didn’t get home until Thursday night. Like my father she was in the work clothes she’d left the house in on Tuesday, as if she’d existed somewhere else completely for a short bit of time, before returning to reality.

My parents were fine. The parents of many of my classmates were not. We attended so many funerals that year. Classmates were constantly sitting shiva. It completely disrupted the flow of that year. School was shut down for over a week. My parents didn’t go to work for almost two weeks. Trains still weren’t running. People were nicer, more patient. The sky looked weird. The city smelled different. These are the things I remember — things I don’t know how to properly explain to anyone that was not there.

I don’t remember how we transitioned out of that changed world because when we were in the middle of it, we felt like it would never end. Things somehow returned to “normal”…a new normal.

I don’t know if non-NYers know this but after the attacks you could visit the site. It was a pile of rubble but you could go and stand on a platform and watch construction equipment move dirt and beams. There was a gaping hole in lower Manhattan. Too much sky; too much space. I couldn’t believe that at one point I’d been over 100 floors up, letting some woman hand me a towel so I could dry my hands. I think about that woman a lot.

9/11 is actually a big reason I’m a doctor. It’s the first time in my life I felt truly helpless and I decided I didn’t like that feeling and I didn’t understand why more wasn’t being done. I don’t know what “more” was but I wanted to do it. And now I can do “more”. During the pandemic in 2020, “more” was all we did.

I don’t like in Brooklyn anymore. I actually live in Lower Manhattan, only 6 or so blocks from the 9/11 memorial. That boy that hugged me on the stairs is my boyfriend now. Ironically he works in the new One World Trade Center. Occasionally he sends me photos from work, views from his desk. Thankfully he’s nowhere near the 100th+ floor. Thankfully, the 20 year anniversary fell on a Saturday. I honestly don’t think I would have allowed him to go to work today if it hadn’t.

It’s all so surreal. Every year passes and it feels further away but every anniversary these feelings of helplessness and uncertainty flood back in and I feel paralyzed by them. This is the first time I’ve ever really organized these thoughts. I don’t like to talk about it. I don’t like to think about it. Images or recordings from that day make me physically ill. I can’t explain it. My father thinks it’s because if I was a doctor back in 2001 I would be dead now because I would have absolutely run into that building to help. He’s probably right.

Every year when I see some ignorant fuck on social media spouting off about conspiracy theories or the American government bringing this upon themselves, I want to scream. If you look at the anniversary of 9/11 as anything other than a day to remember the almost 3,000 people that lost their lives, please sort of your priorities. This isn’t the time to get political or to take a side. There is no side. 9/11 isn’t a talking point. It was a real thing that happened to real people. Hate existed and people lost their lives because of it and then the world changed. Whether you were alive or not - whether you were there or not: It’s shameful to make this day about anything other than that.

#let a girl kvetch #blog ish things #personal #about me #9/11 terrorist attacks #9/11/2001 #september 11 #9/11 #September 11 2001 #first time I’ve ever organized these thoughts so it’s kind of a mess #apologies in advance

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truecrimesstuff · 3 years

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The only judge in India who was hanged:

This heinous crime dates back to the early 70s and in its entirety jolted the whole of Assam, India. Upendra Nath Rajkhowa was posted as a District and Sessions Judge in Dhuburi, Assam in 1969. Due to his rank and service, he was given many facilities and even a bungalow for accommodation. His family consisted of his wife Mrs. Putuli Rajkhowa and three daughters namely Miss Nirmali Rajkhowa, Miss Jonali Rajkhowa, and Miss Rupali Rajkhowa.

Upendra Nath Rajkhowa and his family.

Rajkhowa initially arrived alone in Dhuburi and stayed up in the Circuit House and later on shifted to the bungalow given by the government. Around October 1969 during the Durga Puja holidays his family arrived in Dhuburi and started staying with him. After the holidays were over his youngest daughters Jonali Rajkhowa and Rupali Rajkhowa went back to resume their college studies in Guwahati.

In January 1970, Rajkhowa told Bigan Prosad Rout, a helper in his court to uproot a stump that was standing near his bathroom. Rout did what was asked of him with the help of another helper in the court Md. Sahid Ali and the gardener Radha Nath Mali. As the stump was removed a pit was left behind in the same location. Rajkhowa didn't allow the helpers to fill up the pit stating that he wanted to grow some flowers there. He again advised Md. Sahid Ali to dig up another pit at the East side of the compound where he said he would plant some lotuses which will be brought from Coochbehar.

Rajkhowa retired from his services on 2nd February, 1970, but he didn't immediately vacate the bungalow. 10th February being Saraswati Puja, Rajkhowa sent all his house helps to go out and celebrate. Bigan later recalled that at about 8:30 P.M when he returned he saw Rajkhowa coming back from somewhere with his wife and eldest daughter Nirmali and all three were seen sitting around the fire and talking. Sadly, it was the last day Putuli Rajkhowa and Nirmali Rajkhowa were seen alive.

On 11th February, when Bigan came to the Rajkhowa residence he was shocked to learn from Mr. Rajkhowa that his wife and eldest daughter had gone back to Guwahati, Assam and that Mr.Rajkhowa had himself gone to drop them at the bus stop. When he further questioned about why they had gone back since there were no plans even till the previous evening Rajkhowa told him that they had decided on moving back as he was already retired. Rajkhowa then sent Bigan to the market and when he returned he saw Rajkhowa washing some clothes in the bathroom and the disposal water coming out had a red tinge. Later, that day a plumber who had come to the Rajkhowa residence to repair a water pump saw Rajkhowa leveling a pit near the kitchen. When Rajkhowa saw the plumber he ran away inside and instead sent a helper to tell the plumber that the owner of the house wasn't there.

Upendra Nath Rajkhowa's two younger daughters Jonali and Rupali were studying in Guwahati at that time and were staying in the house of Barada Charan Sarma, the brother-in-law of Upendra Nath Rajkhowa. On 14th February 1970 Rajkhowa gave a call to Sarma asking him to send Jonali and Rupali to Dhuburi as he had planned a Darjeeling trip with the family. Sarma informed Rajkhowa about their impending exams but Rajkhowa was adamant so, he sent Jonali and Rupali to Dhuburi by the afternoon bus that day itself. Rajkhowa himself went to the bus stand to pick them up and when they asked about the whereabouts of their mother and elder sister they were informed by Rajkhowa to be visiting a relative name Lakhi Goswami in Kokrajhar. Jonali and Rupali were last seen alive by Bigan on 25th February 1970 at about 10:00 A.M. At 2:30 P.M Bigan saw Rajkhowa talking to a man in a black car and at about 4:30 P.M when Rajkhowa came back into the house he instead told Bigan that he had sent back his two daughters to Guwahati in a friend's car as they were having some study issues. On 26th February, Rajkhowa got the second pit which was dug in the East side of his compound filled up by his accomplice in the crime Umesh Baishya, who was also the house help. The pit was later leveled up by an unaware Md. Sahid Ali.

Rajkhowa's accomplice in the crime, Umesh Baishya.

On 13th April 1970 Rajkhowa sent two letters to Barada Sarma stating that his wife hasn't come back, that he received a phone call on Saturday and he would be traveling to Delhi on Tuesday night. He also informed him that Jonali and Rupali won't be appearing for the exams and would return to Guwahati in June. On 15th April, he left Dhuburi by the Siliguri Express after leaving some of his belongings in the hands of Mr. Golok Sarma and Mr. Joy Prakash Chakravarty. His accomplice in the crime Umesh Baishya stayed in the bungalow after he left, until June 1970.

After his departure, his further whereabouts were unknown until June 1970 when Rajkhowa visited Mr. Satya Prakash Chakravarty, father in Gauripur where he ended up staying for three days. He was asked about his family members but he said they were in Delhi. When he was getting ready to leave, Rajkhowa pleaded with the Chakravarty's to keep his visit and his further plan to go to Siliguri a secret. After this visit, Rajkhowa departed to Savoy Hotel in Siliguri.

In June, when after repeated attempts to contact Upendra Nath Rajkhowa failed, Barada Sarma started a frenzied search to get hold of him to enquire about his sister and nieces. Barada came to Dhuburi and was informed by Joy Prakash Chakravarty and Golok Sarma, who were close friends of Rajkhowa that he was at Room no 3 in Savoy Hotel, Siliguri. On 25th July 1970 Barada Sarma left with Apurba Barua, brother-in-law of Rajkhowa and D.N Kahali, the then officer-in-charge of Dhuburi Police Station, to Siliguri Savoy Hotel. They got hold of Rajkhowa in the aforementioned location. The men started questioning Rajkhowa who later told them that the whereabouts of his wife and daughters can be said only in writing. He was given a piece of paper whete ajkhowa wrote in Assamese that Putuli, Nirmali, Jonali, and Rupali weren't anymore in this world. When further pressed about their exact whereabouts, he later said that his wife had one evening seriously injured herself in a fall that led to her death and that Nirmali had also died due to an overdose of sleeping tablets. On their tragic death he wasn't in a sane mind and didn't know what to do so he called some people who disposed of the bodies by throwing them in the Brahmaputra river for a sum of Rs. 500. Rajkhowa further stated that the news of their mother and elder sister's death was too much to handle for his younger daughters and they committed suicide one evening by jumping into the Brahmaputra river. After he wrote this statement, Barada Sarma told him to accompany them to the police station to issue the same statement. They then went out of the room so that Rajkhowa can change his clothes. After some time they heard a sound and all of them barged inside and found that Rajkhowa attempted suicide by assaulting himself with a knife.

Rajkhowa was immediately taken to the hospital and a case was registered by Apurba Barua in the Siliguri police station. But when Barada didn't receive any additional information from the Siliguri police station he registered a case in Dhuburi Police Station on 4th August, 1970 and atlast on 9th August after twodays of continuous questioning, Rajkhowa confessed to killing his wife and daughters and burying their bodies within the official compound of the district judge with the help of the house help Umesh Baishya. He also further stated that that the crimes were committed on the nights of 10th February and 25th February, 1970. The Police then examined the pits where Rajkhowa had confessed burying the bodies of his family members. A pair of skeletons was found in both the pits and as a result Umesh Baishya was arrested immediately in 11th August, 1970, for helping Rajkhowa in committing the crime and in 13th August Upendra Nath Rajkhowa was arrested from Siliguri Hospital.

The then District and Sessions Judge's residence in Dhuburi where Rajkhowa buried his wife and daughters. This house is now infamously known in Assam as "Bhoot-Bangla" or "Ghosthouse".

Soon, the trial began and it went on for a year and the lower court sentenced Upendra Nath Rajkhowa to death and his accomplice in the crime Umesh Baishya to lifetime imprisonment. Upendra Nath Rajkhowa further appealed at the High Court against the death sentence, but the High Court upheld the decision of the Lower Court. Rajkhowa again appealed at the Supreme Court, but here too the previous sentences of the High Court and Lower Court were upheld. Rajkhowa also appealed to the President for mercy petition, but it was turned down. On 14 February 1976, the former judge Upendra Nath Rajkhowa was hanged in Jorhat jail for the murder of his four family members. But one big mystery still surrounds the case, Rajkhowa never told anyone even after numerous questioning the reason behind murdering his own wife and daughters and it still to this day remains a mystery.

Note: As this case dates back to the 70s I didn't find any good pictures of the victims and the criminals. The above given pictures are screenshots taken from some old youtube videos.

#true crime #true crime community

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jamestrmtx · 3 years

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Fairytale Complex - [Undertale | Sans x Reader]

[Gender Neutral, Frisk's Parent Reader | Slow Burn]

Chapter Nine | Dating Tense! (Part 3 of 3)

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Your conversation with Undyne goes a similar route as with Toriel's: confronting a stranger in the name of protecting the one you held most dear, as a result ending whatever possible, friendly connections you could've likely formed with her right from the start -- without that complex context placed between you. Seeing everyone as your enemy is draining at its least, but the reward you visualize for everyone ahead makes it all seem worth it. That thought alone provides with strength to keep pushing forward, and even more so when you remind yourself over obtaining a possible happy ending of your very own, were you to resolve this situation with the monsters first.

With that thought in mind, you set the empty teacup down on the coffee table and take a deep breath in, preparing yourself to continue with the conversation. You're already halfway through the most difficult process with Undyne, so backing away now would be useless; thankfully, the tea has enough chamomile in it for you to quell your anger and turn it into sobriety, instead. Of course, that sounds way easier than it is, but -- compared to how you felt when talking with Toriel -- it's a difference as large as the distance between the sky and Earth. Keeping in mind all the kindness and patience you've been shown throughout the process helps with that, as well.

You stand up, continuing with, "I understand protecting the Underground was your priority, but…" You stop to breathe again. "Why… Why would you attack without waiting to see what Frisk had to say? If you were informed enough to know there was a human running free in the Underground, then couldn't you have known they weren't causing any harm, in the first place?"

Despite the tea, its effects and your subsequent calm don't last long. Frustration keeps you from staying in one, sole place without fidgeting, so you let energy out through a composed, back-and-forth pace across the living room. You stop for a second and face down at Undyne, who keeps herself seated, eye meeting with your gaze. "How many of those six souls were murdered, and…" Your breath hitches. "And how many of them were genuine, self-sacrifices? I… I wouldn't be so angry, if you were just honest with me and told me how many human lives were taken away without their honest approval, and exactly how many of them sacrificed their lives for you, in the end."

At the thought of Frisk, still selfless towards plenty of things based on how young they were and the education they received -- both at home and at school -- you keep your posture straight, eager to say more. "And was there really no other solution than taking those souls? If… If Frisk saved your kind without having to give up their own life for it, then why did all this happen? Why… Why did six people have to die before a different solution could come around?" A pause and a sigh help you recollect your thoughts. "Or were they threatening the lives of your kind? 'Cause that makes a lot more sense than simply taking away the soul of the first human you saw, no matter their age, background, or intentions."

Undyne still stays silent for a while even after you're done, eye now cast down at the floor as she frowns and her hands hold onto her knees. "...Well," she says, trailing off with a sigh. "I was only ordered to chase after whatever human I crossed paths with." She lifts her gaze from the floor while a hand toys around with the scales on her neck, distracting herself from you. "It wasn't every day a human would fall down there, so we were eventually ordered to, well... kill whatever human did happen to end there… Indiscriminately." Finally, she makes eye contact with you, frown quivering as she takes another quick pause. "According to what we were told, it had been years since a human last fell down, so when Frisk arrived, I... I just sought after them without thinking twice."

"But if that many years passed by, couldn't your kind look for another solution? If… If Alphys built a new body for her friend out of nothing but scraps, and with two different forms -- mind you -- then... Then couldn't another scientist on similar or equal terms of knowledge have done something about all this? Why wait so long, if… if all it took was a child to find another solution for you?" Your voice breaks and your ire finally snaps with, "Where's your sense of justice? Or does it only apply when it's convenient?"

She notices the change herself, though she doesn't flinch nor retaliate; neutrality is her only reaction as she replies with, "(L/N), in all honesty, I…" Undyne stops, facing down again as her grimace deepens, sorrow dampening her eye. "I'm... I'm not sure how to answer that."

Seeing you've reached a dead end, you glance over towards Alphys, who tries to look away, failing when you call out her name. "What about you, Doctor Alphys? Was there really no other thought in mind other than waiting for the next prey to arrive? Was there truly no…" Your breathing grows scarce, hinting at you losing your grip on the intensity of your emotions again. "Was there truly no other option than for us to be enemies? For your kind and mine to… to simply keep up with the damage our ancestors made and left behind?"

Alphys is shaking, yet you stay unfazed, only lessening your level of intimidation by uncrossing your arms and looking away from her, giving her some space and time to reply.

"I'm n- not sure what to say, either, but… Y- You do have a point." She wrings her hands, her shaking attempting to compose itself through that. "But… As a f- former scientist of the Underground, I wasn't told much over what the rules were. One of the few things that I took part on was in... in creating Mettaton's new body." Her hands unwind, shoulders copying them. "I... I know he was programmed to k- kill humans, but like you mentioned: he was my friend before any of that happened, and so he already had a life and consciousness before I made that new version of him. It- It just so happened that I… I modified a few things so that he could-"

Her words are interrupted as Frisk walks into the living room, still sleepy-eyed. They rub their eyes with the sleeve of their shirt, and a frown presents itself when they take a good look at the scene before them.

"What's wrong?" they sign, expression furrowed.

They take in everything around them, letting their face lose tension when their gaze moves on over to you, encouraging them to approach you. "You're here!" Frisk grabs your hand, taking a look at the time on your watch. Then, they raise an eyebrow, letting you go to continue with, "You didn't go to work today? Or did you leave early?"

You smile, let your guard fall, and bring them into your arms, holding them up. "The streets got flooded, so I couldn't go anymore after lunchtime," you say, kissing their cheek. "How've you been, though? Did you have fun at miss Toriel's new place? I've been here since twelve, but you were sleeping, so I didn't want to wake you."

They grin, nodding as they bring their arms firm around your neck, hugging you close. "I had fun." You tense a little at the sound of their voice despite there being more people besides Toriel, Brenda, or you around; how often selective mutism kept them from saying things out loud in front of other people made their voice a rare thing to hear in public, no matter how small the crowd was. It's only when they're alone with you or people of trust that they have the courage to speak up out loud -- a rare case was Frisk being capable of talking with Bubbles regardless of them having met him only once so far, yet you dismiss that one as them having simply gotten along well with him right from the start, rather than associating it with them truly forgiving you and wanting to defend you, as a result. "A- Are you gonna stay here, then? It's raining a lot!"

"I believe they have no other choice, dear," Toriel intervenes, easing out the tension left from your earlier conversation, still unfinished.

She arrives next to you; a set of clothes are held out in her hands, these neatly folded and accompanied by some soap, a towel, and a roll-on deodorant. "(L/N) was waiting for the skies to clear up, but the rain and the floods have made it near impossible for any of us to leave this house." You set Frisk down and take the clothes, surprised to see a set of pajamas similar to Toriel's clothing style, and even some (men/women)'s underwear tucked underneath all the other items -- and unused based on the size tag still attached to it. "I am not sure if these sizes will fit you, but those clothes are all spares I keep stored away for guests." She lowers her voice and gets closer to you. "The undergarments are new, of course." She giggles, winking at you afterwards. "The bathroom is upstairs, if you would like to shower now."

You inspect the clothes again, frustration simmering down back to calm as you let your shoulders lessen their stress with a sigh. "Thank you, ma'am."

• • •

Barely two months into knowing the monsters, and you're already staying at their place. While Alphys and Undyne are capable of leaving under the current, wild weather at will if they were to take their needed precautions, neither Frisk nor you can step a foot outside without drawing it back in. The streets are a mess of puddles, nature-made swimming pools, and car alarms going off; the scenery outside is close to that of becoming something of a meteorologist's concern and a scientific anomaly, yet the news and every other information outlet available continues to report it as something of lesser concern than what it is.

As you stare outside, Frisk now resting on your lap, you worry over two things: the lost meeting at your office, and the stranded car belonging to Sans's brother. You comb your fingers through Frisk's hair, using that as a means of entertainment from your worries. They're still sleeping soundly, tired out by both finishing their homework and playing with you at the indoor, mini playground Toriel set up for them.

"I'll pay for any damages to your car as soon as this clears up." You direct your words at Papyrus, who stops gazing outside to face you, looking dazed. His mind looks to be somewhere else, though another squint at your appearance makes him snap out of it.

"That is the least of my concerns now, (L/N)." He smiles at you, leaving the window to crouch next to you, couch occupied with Frisk, Sans, and yourself. "I can go look for it tomorrow morning. And as for whatever damages it gets, I am certain my insurance will look over this case! There have been plenty of reports discussing the damages made by the rain, so it is not my greatest worry." His gaze falls on Frisk, a warmer look reaching his face. "Do you want me to carry them back to bed? It's getting late!"

"It's fine-"

"Please, I insist!"

You smile at his persistence, far more endearing than his older brother's. The thought makes you pay attention back towards Sans, who's still showing signs of exhaustion on his body, slumped over to the corner. His eye sockets are closed, dark circles beginning to show under them.

"Thank you." You pay attention back to Papyrus, who takes Frisk in his hold, propping them safe with both arms.

You stand up, ready to help out, yet he dismisses your actions with the words, "Stay and chat with Toriel. I assume you both still have plenty to talk about, don't you? You should take this opportunity to talk with her and the other ladies! Perhaps then, you can leave this place with a different perspective by the time the rain stops."

"I will." You nod and watch him leave, carrying your child up in his arms with seemingly no difficulty. His steps fade as so does his figure, leaving you be with Sans sleeping at the couch, the owner of the house by the kitchen, and Undyne and Alphys standing by the living room. The pair's gazes are occupied on the window, carrying a similar expression to Papyrus's from earlier before.

You don't even know how to start up another conversation with the last one having ended poorly, yet try again by using the easiest route possible: going over to Toriel and asking if she needs help with dinner. You stand up and stretch out, legs numb with how long Frisk had been sitting on your lap. It's only fortunate tomorrow's Friday, the beginning of another weekend.

"Can I help with anything?"

Those are the first words you say as you enter the kitchen, greeted by the smell of boiling vegetables and the sound of a knife against a cutting board. Toriel's next to the stove, cutting some carrots, but stopping to look at you. A smile forms on her face, and she nods once, pointing with her gaze at the potatoes resting on the counter next to hers. "Did Frisk go back to sleep?" she asks, facing back at the carrots again, continuing with her work. "I am amazed at how much energy they have, and how little they want to sleep now that they've seen how many people are in this home. It is only when I insist that they need to rest up for the sake of their health that they do so."

While you're not sure if she's being indirect or not, the goat lady's words lead you to assume one thing, and that's Frisk not wanting to waste time sleeping when at the monsters' home. With you, they went out like a light, going to sleep right when you told them to. Only when there was a full house and when family members came to visit did they break that rule, far too excited over the new faces for them to sleep.

"Papyrus took them back to their room," you reply, reminding yourself not to let your thoughts drift again. "And that's... normal for them, actually." You decide to be truthful with her, following Papyrus's advice. "They usually don't like to sleep when they're too excited about something. Every time my family visits, they're just a big ball of energy and don't sleep until everyone's doing the same." A smile forms at that, a memory from when your ex came to visit Frisk slipping through. "When my, um… ex-husband used to visit, they would stay up late playing games with him. So I guess Frisk feels the same way about you and their other monster friends."

With the potatoes already washed and peeled, all that's left is to cut them and throw them into the pot. You ask her over what size you should cut them, turning your back to her again when you're given an answer. "Is there anything you would like to ask me about, (L/N)?" Toriel asks, speaking in between cuts. "If there is any doubt you have over me, and even over Dreemurr, Sans, and others I know well, I can inform you about it. But as for things that are personal, that is up to them."

Thunder crashes at the nearby window just as you're slicing, finger almost ending up in the same condition as the potatoes, but prevented by your reflexes. The lights go out on par with another loud blast of lightning, plenty more violent than the first one.

"Goodness!" you hear Toriel say.

You follow the sound of her voice to see a sphere of flames held up in her hand; it reveals her face, now furrowed with worry. "Are you alright?"

"I'm alright." You set the knife aside and join her side, following her orders when she informs you there are candles on the bottom drawer beside her. You act quickly, taking them out and lighting them up with the help of her fire magic. "Are you?"

She nods, a gentle look crossing her. "We should go check on the others." Her gaze points back at the drawer, left open. "Could you bring more of those?"

"Of course, ma'am."

You take the emptiest box of the three and follow her out of the kitchen.

Your surroundings are now left pitch dark except for a bright and glowing, blue spear held out by Undyne, Alphys standing next to her. A tall figure holding up a smaller one can be seen near the couch, people who you assume are Papyrus and Frisk based on who's the only one left to find. "Has anyone seen Sans?" Papyrus asks, fret tracing his voice. "He's not on the couch anymore!"

Looking to where he points at, you see he's right. The couch is empty with the exception of your and Frisk's belongings. Not even a trace of him can be seen left around, making it appear as if he's outright vanished from existence, and not even the dim lighting produced by the candles can aid with tracking him down amongst all the people, objects, and darkness laid around.

While others assemble and call out for Sans as they search through all the rooms they could possibly imagine finding him in, you try to come up with a different solution besides that. Him disappearing was more than unlikely considering he didn't have any magic or energy left in him for teleportation, so you rule that out as a possibility and take a moment to observe your surroundings a bit closer. You look at the couch again, as if still expecting to catch a glimpse of him there despite what you're doing right now. But as fate would have it, your keys pop into your mind when you come across the sight of your suit jacket, umbrella, and all other belongings left behind on a corner of the couch, most of these stored away in a bag or left nearby it.

Reminded over what your car keys have attached to them, you go look for them, bumping into someone right as you're about to make it there.

You wobble and -- at the feeling of losing balance -- you act fast. You break your own fall and later grab onto the person to prevent them from falling, though you don't need to do much when you notice their height doesn't reach that much higher than your chest. Add to that your sturdier body helping with breaking the fall, and you've managed to stop the both of you from fully crashing into each other or stumbling to the floor.

You sit down on the couch when you feel you're losing your balance and hold the person upright. You then let go to look through your bag, retrieving the keys and -- along with them -- a small, solar flashlight hanging from it. The light's directed right at the person's face, revealing Sans's, who looks as if caught in a bad deed.

"Are you okay?" You don't bother over bringing up the fact he face-planted right into your chest, nor that his hands gripped tight onto your waist for support; the sheer sincerity of his surprise at bumping into you makes you assume he hadn't done it on purpose.

"I'm, uh… I'm fine." His words are just as spacey as his gaze, and his irises point at the floor for a second, spacing off yet again. "Sorry about that." He sits right beside you on the couch, facing up to meet with your eyes. "I was gonna check up on the ceiling since it's rainin' so hard. Kinda looks like it'll start leakin' soon."

Thunder strikes again, sending the monster back into your hold. His hands grip onto your shirt next as he freezes up in place, just before he can get to reveal the true meaning over his disappearance.

"Are you… Are you scared over this?" You try to push down your amusement, yet are unable to when you see his grip is tight enough to remind you of a cat being frightened.

When another one strikes, louder than the rest, you bring up another question while biting back a smile. "Is it… Is it the noise?" He tenses up even more, encouraging you to bring him closer, his current proximity far different from his attempts at flirting with you. "Sans." You call out his name, attempting to snap him out of it. "What's wrong? You're as cold as ice!"

He doesn't react, though you can feel him shake and shiver under your hold. You look down at him to see his eye sockets are tightly shut. How much he's scooted closer makes him sit on your lap, though his smaller figure helps you with keeping him safe and balanced in your hold.

As you keep him that way, you can only ask yourself one thing:

Would you come off as an insensitive jerk if you decided to tease him over this in the future?

At the sound of a louder crash, the skeleton's unresponsive, caught up in his fear.

...Or would it work best not to take that risk?

For the time being, you hold him closer.

The feeling of everyone's eyes on you surges when you move your eyes away from the skeleton to look around you. In contrast, you see Papyrus and Frisk too busy playing with a candle to notice what's happening, along with Toriel having all her attention on lighting more candles. It's only Alphys and Undyne who take notice, both their faces equally enlightened by what's unfolding on the couch. They look ready to yap their mouths off over the situation between you and the one clinging onto you, yet one sharp look of caution at the two keeps them from saying anything risky about it.

Whether they knew about Sans's fear you didn't know about, and whether he wanted it to be known you weren't aware of, either. For now, you hold him close, trying your best to ignore the women's stares and waiting until Sans snaps out of it. His hold on you's firm and close, needful and impartial as the thunderstorm continues to gain strength.

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#sans x reader #undertale x reader #lgbt #lgbt themes #gender neutral reader #male reader #female reader #mother reader #father reader #parent reader #chubby reader #long fic #romcom #adventure #mystery #platonic relationships #slow burn

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msmarvelouswinchester · 3 years

Text

Love In Sin

Chapter 9

Summary - Special Agent Winchester is forced to go undercover with his frenemy Special Agent L/N when they try to track down a notorious drug dealer. How will Y/N and Dean complete their task? Will their relationship worsen or will new feelings emerge between them?

Pairing - AU!Detective Dean Winchester x Reader

Warning - None, Fluff-ish

Word Count - 1.5k

Square Filled - Clothes Sharing ( @spndeanbingo )

A/N 1 - Surprise, this series lives! So, it has been a loooong time. I wasn't originally planning to post this part today but my college is killing me and I am hardly getting any writing (and reading) done. This was already done and edited so I finally decided to post this today.

A/N 2 - This may seem like a filler chapter but it's not, trust me. It's a very important chapter which plays a crucial part in the next chapters. ENJOY!

Beta'd by the absolute sweetheart @deanwanddamons <3<3

Divider by @firefly-graphics

Series Masterlist

Groaning loudly, Dean dropped his head as you paced around the room, complaining for the hundredth time that night.

“Will you stop?” He grumbled. You came to a halt when you heard his words and turned to look towards him. Throwing a glare his way you continued your pacing .

“Y/N/N, stop it. This isn't going to solve our problem - it'll only annoy the tenants downstairs,” he said and got up from his chair.

“What are we supposed to do? My pacing around is definitely not helping neither is your what, fourth glass of whiskey,” you retorted.

“Third,” Dean said, “this is my third glass and I'm tryin’ to get drunk.”

“We ended up in this situation because we were slacking and this is exactly what we are doing again,” you raised your voice, regretting your decision to stay at Dean’s house with him, “if you won't even try to get out of this situation, I'll be going back to my house tomorrow.”

“You won't stay alone in that house until we catch that son of a bitch,” he said, setting his glass and walking over to you, “it's dangerous.”

You knew it was dangerous considering how the house you had rented in Kansas was destroyed when you had gone back to get your belongings - furniture was thrashed, utensils were broken and clothes were torn, but nothing was stolen. It was clear that Crowley's men were trying to send you a sign to leave their boss alone.

It was Bobby who suggested that staying alone and travelling a few kilometres everyday to discuss the proceedings of the case would be a bad idea since Crowley and Co. were waiting for the perfect opportunity to cause disruption in the case. And knowing how ruthless Crowley could be, murder and kidnapping didn't seem like a far-fetched option for him.

Dean had piped up saying it would be better to stay at his house since he had noticed your house had a weak security system. His other reason was that he had a car, unlike you.

Needless to say, you had reluctantly agreed to stay with the green eyed detective, but deep down inside, you knew that staying with Dean gave you a sense of security and you didn't want to let that go.

“We will figure a way out,” he said, standing a little too close to you.

“How?” You asked the obvious question.

“I have contacted my brother. He will be working as our lawyer to get them to drop the charges. Sammy will be here early morning tomorrow,” he said, removing a stray piece of hair from your face, “but you gotta cool down, sweetheart. Give that pretty little head of yours a little rest.”

“I-I can't. I am freaking out Dean,” you said.

“I know. You have almost bore a hole in the ground by your pacing,” you hit his arm lightly, making him chuckle, “I'm thinkin’ about the case too.”

“Is Sam-will he be able to….this is a critical one,” you mumbled, looking down at the floor.

“I have faith in my brother and he can go to hell and back to save me just like I can. Sammy will do anything to help us. Trust me,” he said, putting a finger under your chin, prompting you to look up at him. He leaned in and placed a kiss on your forehead. This simple act worked like a sedative and you calmed down a bit.

“Join me for a drink,” Dean said and strolled his way back to the couch. You followed him and took a seat beside him. Pouring a drink, he handed you the glass.

“One drink. Only.” You said.

“Alright.”

“Who do you think might be the mole?” you asked, taking a sip of your drink

“It can be anyone. Charlie, Kevin, Bobby, Rufus-”

“Ruby, you,” he nodded, “me.”

“Like I said, it could be anyone,” Dean said.

“Motive?”

“Depends.”

“Do you think we can prove our innocence?” You asked, “the cops kinda caught us red handed and-”

“It's….tough.” Dean said and jumped out of his seat, knocking over the tumbler of ice.

You tilted your head in confusion, furrowing your eyebrows.

“What?” You insisted.

“A few years back, when we were only fledglings in the bureau, Rufus Turner was working Crowley’s case. This information was in the case file that Bobby gave to us. He had arrested two men in his gang but by the time they had got to know about that dick, they had already lost him. He had escaped the feds again,” he explained, flailing his arms all around in excitement.

“Maybe we can find out who those two men were and interrogate them about Crowley,” you said, smiling a little for the first time that night, knowing you had a lead.

“Now all we need is access to those two men's files. FBI is not gonna help us so we have to take matters in our own hands. I’ll call Ash and ask him to find those,” Dean said and ran back to his room to get his phone.

“Ash? What about Charlie?” You asked, when he came back to the room, “And shouldn't you tell Sam first? He is our lawyer and he should be informed about this.”

“It's not like we are gonna interrogate a witness and Ash is a good friend of mine. He is not a fed whereas Charlie works at the bureau and right now we can't trust anyone who works there because we don't know who might be working as a two-faced devil and ratting us out to the God of the Underworld,” Dean said, dialing Ash’s number.

“Ash,” he said when the said man picked up the phone after a few rings.

“Listen, we are kind of in a tricky situation here-oh you heard….not really, we got one week….no it won't….I know you're a busy man, Ash,” Dean said, rolling his eyes, “but we need your help….yeah….the thing is we need access to the old case files related to the drug mafia Crowley….yeah I know that genius….can't you-fine….I owe you one.”

“So?” You asked, hoping for good news.

“Ash will let us know by morning,” he said.

“Can we trust him?”

“Yes.”

“Okay,” you reached for the bottle of whiskey.

“What do you think you're doing?” Dean asked, raising his brow.

“Relaxin’,” you shrugged, “you should try to relax sometimes.”

“You think you're such a smartass, huh?” He said and plopped down on the couch beside you, making you giggle.

“Thanks for tonight, Winchester,” you turned towards your friend.

“For what? For helping you calm down when you were running around like a headless chicken?” He smirked.

“Shut up,” you grumbled, “you know what I mean.”

“I'm here for you. We're in this shit together and I promise to get us out of this mess,” he said as you moved closer to him.

“And I have faith in you.” He pulled you closer and kept your head on his shoulder. He hummed in response. You closed your eyes, sighing loudly, but the sweet moment of coziness was interrupted quickly.

Your eyes flew open, “You son of a bitch, Winchester! Way to ruin a moment! How dare you put ice in my sweatshirt?” Dean laughed out loud.

“First of all, that's my sweatshirt you are wearing and you were looking too peaceful with your head on my shoulder,” he laughed.

“Fuck you!” You growled, and hit his arm hard.

“Ow!” He rubbed his arms. Dean effectively dodged your second attack, “woah, easy there tiger.” By now you were laughing too. As your laughter died down, you looked at Dean and saw him smiling softly at you. You blushed furiously under his strong gaze.

“You hungry?” Dean asked, clearing his throat.

“Uh-huh. Kinda forgot about food today until now.” You said, diverting your eyes.

“I'm thinking about ordering pizza. You okay with that?” He asked.

“Sure.” You said.

Half an hour later, as you were enjoying the delicious pizza and watching some crappy tv trying to put a break on the racing thoughts, you heard Dean speak.

“About earlier,” he sighed.

“Oh yeah. You better be sorry Winchester,” you gave him an annoyed look.

“No, I'm not sorry for that. It was fun,” he laughed.

“No it wasn't,” you said, but failed to hide the smile threatening to take over your face.

“It made you smile,” he pointed out.

“Fine, you're forgiven,” you said as Dean gave you a cheeky grin.

“In all seriousness, what I said earlier, I meant it. I promise to get us out of this mess,” he said, leaning down to give you a chaste kiss on your cheek, your skin tingling with an unknown sensation.

“I know,” you said, “I think I should go to bed now. We have a long day ahead of us.” Dean nodded as you got up and made your way over to his guest room.

Let me know if you want to be tagged in the series!

Feedback is highly appreciated!

#dean x reader #supernatural #dean winchester x y/n #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester #au dean x reader #dean winchester fic #dean winchester x you #deanxreader #au dean winchester x you #au dean fic #love in sin #jensen ackles #supernatural fanfic #au dean winchester x reader #dean fanfiction #dean winchester fanfic #spn

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starfleetakaashi · 4 years

Text

— to the only boy i’ve ever loved before; atsumu x reader

GENRE. fake dating au, college au, fluff, and angst if you squint ur pretty eyes!

PAIRING. atsumu miya x fem reader

SUMMARY. Atsumu Miya was a piece of shit, everyone knew, but your horny teenager ass still had a crush on him, and he knew. Oh, did he know. Thankfully, high school days were over and college days had finally rolled by, and your crush for the blonde setter was gone. Or, so you thought.

WORD COUNT. 3.6k words

AUTHOR’S NOTE. i’ve been simping over this fool lately, so i couldn’t help myself!!! this fic is lowkey inspired by tatbilb (to all the boys ive loved before) and idkkk i find that movie so adorable even though the second one was a disappointment. anyways! enjoy this bbies, pls reblog and leave any feedback!! xoxo also wrote this one in one sitting wtf is wrong with me i

“Stop following me, Miya.” You said his name with so much venom laced in your voice that the said man had shivers run up his spine in slight fear. He swallowed his fear, an evil smirk playing on his lips as he placed his hands on his hips.

“I will eventually,” he says, and you give him a side-eye glance. “If you’re willin’ to listen to my proposition.” He smiles at you, and you groan aloud, not exactly having the energy to deal with his bullshit so early in the morning.

He was on his way to morning practice while you were on your way to the library to get some extra studying before your big test in Chemistry, your first class of the day. His presence was not in your favor, as he was holding you back from getting any studying done, and Chemistry was in an hour and a half.

“Fine, I’ll listen!” You sigh, rubbing your temples as you exhaled, stress building up already. “Hurry up, will you? I’ve got to study, and last time I checked, you have some plans too.” You say, gesturing to the gym that was right behind Atsumu, who turned back to the gym before nodding at you.

“Be my girlfriend,” he says suddenly, getting straight to the point. If you were drinking something right now, you would have spat it right at his face, and you were starting to wish that you were drinking something just so you could have an excuse to spit at him.

“Excuse me, what?!” You exclaim, immediately laughing at him, and he rolls his eyes as he allows you to finish your childish laughing. “You’ve got to be kidding, Miya. This is a prank, right? Where’s Bokuto, is he hiding in some bushes?” You ask, looking around. The smile on your face disappears when your eyes land back on Atsumu and realize that he was indeed serious.

“Don’t act like I wanna actually date ya,” he scoffs, and your eyebrows furrow in confusion. “I meant fake girlfriend, doll.” He smirks, and you blush at the pet name before clearing your throat.

“Me? Your fake girlfriend?” You ask, and he nods. “Now, why would I do that?” In all honesty, high school you would have been freaking out since you harbored the biggest crush on the blonde fool, but thankfully those feelings went away the summer before college, which was already almost two years ago, with you and Miya being in your second year of college.

“Just for the rest of the year, I promise.” He said, and you squinted, trying to find any traces of lies in his face, and you failed to find any. “My fan girls are drivin’ me crazy, [Last Name]-chan! With ya in my arms, they’ll surely leave me alone!” He sighs dreamily, thinking of possible scenarios that would consist of you and him in different situations, some a little too naughty to name.

“Oh, be quiet!” You kicked him, and he whines a little from the hard impact your foot had made with one of his ass cheeks. “What am I gonna get out of this? Your little fan girls might murder me,” you said, and Atsumu looks at you as he rubs his ass.

“Ya get to have me all day any day,” another kick, another whine. “Kiddin’, I was kiddin, gorilla!” Another kick. “I haven’t thought about it, but consider it, yeah? I gotta go, [Last Name]-chan, make sure ya think ‘bout me!” He chuckles evilly, waving goodbye to you as he jogged to the gym, and you said your goodbye through waving your middle finger in the air.

He’s so annoying.

Bokuto burst out in laughter as you told him what his stupid setter of a teammate had said to you this morning. It was now lunch time, and despite having a rather difficult test in Chemistry a few hours ago, the day went by pretty smoothly.

“It’s not funny, Bo!” You sighed as he calmed down, whispering sorry’s to you before he held his stomach in pain, probably from laughing too hard. “That rascal, how dare he ask me such a weird question!” You gripped your fork harder, the scowl on your face starting to become more apparent than it already was.

“Yes, but think about it!” He says, and you turn to him with a confused look on your face. “Didn’t you have a crush on him in high school? Isn’t it about time you gave the high school version of yourself a little sneak peak?” He wiggles his eyebrows teasingly, and you blush, causing Bokuto to laugh even harder.

“I hate you, Bokuto!” You yelled, smacking the side of his arm as he threw himself at you, throwing his arms around your neck, engulfing you in a tight hug, and of course, you couldn’t not hug back; it was Bokuto after all.

“Good afternoon, senpais!” The two of you turn your heads to Hinata, who had just approached you and Bokuto with his lunch box in hand, a bright smile on his face. “You seem like you’re having fun!” He says, sitting down across from you and Bokuto. You dust your shirt off as Bokuto removes himself from you.

“We were!” He says, and you quickly glare at him, afraid he would say something about what the two of you were just talking about. It’s not like you didn’t trust Hinata, you just didn’t want to drag the poor and innocent first year into the dirty intentions that Atsumu held. “[Name] here was asked by Tsum-Tsum to be his girlfriend! Isn’t that sweet?” He asks, and you face-palm yourself. It was your fault for thinking Bokuto wouldn’t open his big mouth after all.

To your surprise, however, Hinata didn’t seem too shocked about it. In fact, he seemed more... intrigued? “Really?” He asks, and Bokuto asks. “So he actually asked you, senpai! What did you say to him?” Hinata asks you, and you and Bokuto blink at each other before reverting your attention back to the orange-haired first year.

“What do you mean, ‘actually’, Hinata?” You ask, and Hinata takes a bite from his sandwich. “You mean he’s mentioned this to you before?” You ask, and he nods.

“Yeah! I’m the one who suggested it to him,” he says so casually, and Bokuto burst out into another fit of laughter while you sulked. “What, is that bad? I was only trying to help!” He defended himself, and Bokuto pats your head, trying his hardest to stifle a laughter.

“It’s okay, Hinata,” you say, looking up and feeling mentally drained from all the weird events that had occurred to you. “Exactly why did you suggest him that idea?” You ask, and Hinata finishes up his sandwich.

“Well, a week ago, Miya-san came up to me and started talking about his struggles with these girls.” Hinata said as he started chewing on an onigiri that he bought from Atsumu’s brother’s shop, Onigiri Miya. “I felt bad for him, so I started listing some solutions, and the whole fake date thing was one of them!” He grins, and he looked so precious there was no way you could be mad at him.

“See? Why don’t you help out our Tsum-Tsum?” Bokuto asks, and Hinata nods while his eyes were sparkling, and you groan internally. Two of the world’s most precious people were asking you to do them a favor, and a big part of you was telling you to do it. “Plus, your crush on him might come back! That’s extra fun for you, isn’t it?” He asked, and your eyes widened as your face flushed.

“Eh? You had a crush on Miya-san?”

“BOKUTO!!!”

“You really beat up Bokkun today, I’m surprised he was still in the right condition to practice properly,” a voice said from behind you, and you didn’t need to turn around to figure out who it belonged to.

“If you want, I can beat you up instead.” You said as you stood up from the bench and turned around, being met with Atsumu’s face so close to yours that if you moved an inch, your lips would meet. Your eyes widen and you abcked away, “Sheesh, don’t stand so close to me, creep!” You shrieked, and he chuckled, throwing his head back as he laughed.

“What’re ya doin’ out here?” He asked, and you pushed a few strands of your hair behind your ear. “It’s kinda late, ain’t it, [Last Name]-chan?” He looks up at the sky that was littered with stars, the moonlight being the only source of light the two of you had besides the light from inside the gym peeking out from the open doors.

You chose to ignore his question, “Shouldn’t you call me by my first name?” You asked, and he looks down at you, confusion evident in his face. “We’re dating, aren’t we?” You asked nonchalantly, and Atsumu’s face lightens at this, and you rolled your eyes as he engulfed you in a hug and twirled you around.

“Glad to have ya here with me, [Name]-chan!” He smirks, and you couldn’t help the feeling of the butterflies dancing crazily in your stomach as your first name had rolled off his tongue like it was natural. “I’ll take good care of ya!” He winks at you, and you smile at him, catching him a bit off guard.

“Well, you better!” You said, crossing your arms. “I don’t let just anyone date me, Miya!” You said, and Atsumu laughs.

“No!” He says, and you look at him in confusion, eyebrows furrowed. “Say my first name, call me by that instead. I don’t like the name Miya,” he says, and you roll your eyes, sighing.

“Fine, Atsumu.” You emphasize, a grin on your face, and Atsumu smiled as well, hugging you and twirling you in the air once more. You weren’t too fond with the idea of some piece of shit like Atsumu to be touching you like this, but you were doing him a favor, so you had to get used to it.

What you weren’t expecting, however, was for him to crash his lips onto yours.

“Still mad at me, babe?” He grins evilly as he leaned against the doorway of your bedroom. You continued to ignore him as you gathered your necessary things inside your bag, feeling your face heat up as memories from last night replayed.

He kissed you. The little shit kissed you on the lips. Although you two were now ‘dating’, it wasn’t something that you expected nor was it something you were ready for so early. A warning would’ve been nice, but you don’t always get what you want.

“The audacity you had, Atsumu,” you finally spoke to him for the first time that morning, and his smirk only grew. “You could’ve warned me! I should have murdered you,” you sighed, gripping your bag as the two of you left your apartment and started your walking journey to the university. Atsumu laughs as he reaches down for your hand, interlocking it with his tightly. You looked down at your intertwined hands before bringing your eyes back to his.

“We’re datin’ now! I can’t always tell ya when I wanna kiss ya,” he says. “It ain’t believable, so just be prepared for it, babe!” He grins, and you’ve never wanted to smack him so hard in your life. He was already a pain in your ass, and you still had months left until this would be over.

You then started rambling about how you wanted respect from him, and Atsumu glanced at the side before he let go of your hand and captured your face in his hands, bringing your face to his as he locked your lips into a kiss, definitely causing your poor body to enter cardiac arrest (not really, you’re just dramatic).

You glanced behind him and spotted a few girls huddled together as they watched the two of you kiss passionately, and you started to calm down, knowing that he only kissed you in order to start convincing people; more specifically his fan girls.

He pulled away and stared into your eyes before pulling you to his chest, his hand on the back of your head while his other arm was wrapped around your waist. His chin was resting on the top of your head as he closed his eyes in bliss, while you inhaled his scent.

He smelled good.

It’s been a week ever since he kissed you in front of those girls, and from what Hinata has told you, his fan girls were starting to calm down a bit, which allowed Atsumu to relax more, and you noticed it.

You were always a perceptive person, so you knew that Atsumu was always tense whenever practice rolled around. Obviously it wasn’t because of the actual practice, but because he knew that at the end of it, he wouldn’t be able to go straight home and rest as he was always bombarded with his fan girls. Truly the curse of being good looking.

But now, thanks to your little act, his fan girls stopped staying late and waiting for him by the doors and instead just watched from afar, and Atsumu couldn’t feel anything but relief. He was starting to think about having you be his fake girlfriend for the rest of college so that he wouldn’t have to deal with his fan girls, but he unknowingly had other reasons; like maybe actually having you be his real girlfriend because he liked you. Although, you never heard that from me.

You were sitting on one of the benches that were set up in the volleyball gym doing your homework while you waited for Atsumu’s practice to finish up. The two of you were starting to become a daily thing in each others’ lives, and everyone else saw how it was impacting the two of you positively. Bokuto, however, saw it as something else. After all, only him, Sakusa, and Hinata knew of the real thing behind the act the two of you put up.

Bokuto approached you during one of his breaks as everyone else continued practicing. He grabbed his water bottle and sat besides you. You glanced at him for a second before returning back to your work.

“You two are getting closer,” Bokuto says, and you officially avert your attention from your work and focus on Bokuto. “Don’t get too close, ‘kay? I don’t want you getting hurt.” He says, and your eyes widen a little, realization hitting you that this whole thing was fake. You were starting to become a little too comfortable, and it was going to bite you in the ass. You were thankful that Bokuto had warned you, but maybe it was too late.

“Yeah! Of course,” you said, lying through your teeth. Bokuto looked at you, reading through your facial expressions before nodding suspiciously, giving you a smile and a pat on the head before leaving his water bottle on the bench and returning back to practice.

It was then Atsumu’s turn to take a break, standing in front of you as he drank water, even spraying some of it on his face. He looks at Bokuto before looking back at you, pointing to the owl-faced boy.

“What’d he say?” He asks, and your heart starts beating faster, your mind racing through lies in order to cover yourself and refrain from saying the truth.

“Honestly, I wasn’t paying attention,” you said, feeling bad that you had to lie to him. But, it was for the best. After all, this was all fake. An act, and you couldn’t get too attached, even if it was too late.

Atsumu eyes you suspiciously for a second and nodded, putting his water bottle back inside his bag before grabbing your chin with his fingers, getting you to look at him and capturing your lips in a passionate but short kiss. You kissed back with no question, savoring it as much as you can before it becomes a distant memory.

He lets go of you and smiles, jogging back to the team and gets into his position, getting back into the practice rhythm almost immediately. You stared at his back before sighing.

Well, so much for your feelings from high school ‘disappearing’.

It’s been two months since your act with Atsumu started, and just last week was when you decided that it was about time you started fixing yourself. By that, you meant getting yourself together before you completely depend on Atsumu and getting too comfortable with his involvement in your life as it is right now.

You had to start getting used to his absence before you could hurt yourself, and you did just that. You started distancing yourself, only talking to him and engaging in romantic interactions with him when there was people around.

Before, the two of you used to kiss and hug even without the presence of other people, as if the two of you were actually dating. Which was extremely dangerous, as this was supposed to be nothing but a fake relationship.

Atsumu noticed, obviously. I mean, how could he not? You were starting to become something that he had always expected to show up in his daily life, and when you started to disappear from it, he felt off about it. In other words, he didn’t like it. It was safe to go as far and say that he hated it.

Yes, he knew this was fake, but he was starting to wish it wasn’t. Ever since he heard that you had a huge crush on him back in high school, he could never leave you alone, whether it was through teasing you or engaging in actual conversations with you. If it wasn’t for his full dedication to volleyball in high school, he might have been able to be in a real relationship with you.

It’s not like he didn’t have the same full dedication to volleyball now, in fact he was more dedicated to it since he was in a pro-team, but he was an adult now. He knew how to split his priorities, he knew how to make time for other things — people.

So, here he was, spending his Friday night in a club with a few of his teammates, drinking his worries away. Drinking the thoughts of you away. He wasn’t drunk, after all, he hadn’t drank that much, and his teammates could tell that the two of you were distancing. They felt bad for Atsumu, as he was the happiest he’s ever been.

Meanwhile, you were in your apartment, watching The Office with a tub of ice cream on your lap. A few tears were dripping off your face as you watched the scene of Pam and Jim getting engaged in a random gas station, and you just started imagining your future with Atsumu. It would never turn out to be what Pam and Jim have, and that’s what hurt you because you wanted it to.

You fell in love with Atsumu, and you wanted to kick yourself so bad, but you couldn’t help it. You should have said no to his stupid offer, but at the same time, you’re glad you got to experience what it would be like to be in a relationship with him, even if it was all fake.

Your attention was caught when your phone vibrated on the coffee table, and you reached over to pause the show and grab your phone, reading whatever notification was displayed on your lock screen.

atsumu stupid fucking idiot: come out ya apartment babe

Your face contorted in confusion.

you: why? im watching the office

atsumu stupid fucking idiot: please babe? lets hang

He keeps calling you babe, and it’s hurting. He’s making it harder for you, but you can’t say no. It was always a yes when its him, huh?

you: fine.

You turn off your TV and shoved the ice cream back into the freezer. You entered the bathroom and cleaned yourself up, changing into less pajama-like clothes before stepping out of your apartment, only to be met with Atsumu sitting down on the floor and leaning against the wall besides your door.

“Atsumu?” You asked, and he looks up at you, a blush on his face. You could tell that he was a bit drunk, but considering that he came here by himself without any means of struggle, he wasn’t too wasted. You helped him up, and he engulfed you in a hug immediately. “What’s wrong?”

“I missed ya babe,” he whispered in your ear, and tears started prickling the corner of your eyes. No, he can’t do that. It’s not fair. “Why’re you ignorin’ me? It’s not fun, I get sad too, ya know?” He asks, and you sigh, closing your eyes in bliss as you took in his scent, hugging him back.

“I’m sorry,” you said, kissing his cheek. “But this is all fake, Atsumu, I can’t get too attached. It’s not fair to me,” you said, deciding to let your tears ago, creating a wet spot on his black shirt that he always looked good in. Curse him and his good looks, what a bastard.

Atsumu lets go and holds you by the shoulders, looking at your eyes with so much love that you wanted to cry even more. “Who said that? Who said ya couldn’t get attached, huh?” He brings you back in his arms, and you sniffled. “Get attached to me, babe, it ain’t just you,” he says, and you peek up at him, resting your chin against his chest as he looked down at you.

“Can I get attached? Can I really?” You ask, sniffling like a little bitch. Atsumu chuckles, and he didn’t know if it was the slight intoxication he held or if it was his actual feelings, but he was feeling bold. He held your face and brought you in for a kiss like he used to do. Yet, this one seemed different.

This one... it was for real.

#atsumu miya x reader #atsumu x reader #haikyuu!!#hq!!#atsumu miya #atsumu imagines #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu imagines

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