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btsrunmylife · 3 years

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“The Library Keepers: Jamais Vu” - Chapter 1: Planet X

Word Count: 3,712

Genre: Sci-Fi / Fantasy / Action / Adventure / Humor

Rating: Explicit…eventually

Summary: After two years of being stationed on Space Station Baldur, you’re not really expecting anything exciting to happen anymore. With little by the way of scientific discoveries, you and your team are getting a bit restless. Sent out on “special assignment” with Mission Specialist Kim Namjoon, you really aren’t expecting to find (or even see) much of anything.

What you do find is something beyond what either of you could’ve imagined.

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The silence is deafening, ringing loudly in your ears, as you try to see a few feet in front of you. The ship’s lights have gone dark, leaving you with nothing but the stars shining through one of the portholes to light your way.

You blink, taking stock of yourself. You wiggle your fingers, still clenched tightly around your safety belt. You shrug your shoulders, roll your neck, do a mental check of your chest, your nervous and fluttering stomach, your waist. You shift in your seat, experimentally stretching your legs and flexing your toes.

The next thing you do is reach for the helmet hanging to the right of your seat, blindly groping the wall until you find the latches holding it there. You tug it down from the wall and secure it over your head, attaching it to your suit. You reach for an oxygen tank next, practiced hands attaching the hose to your helmet.

Once situated with your oxygen tank turned on, you switch on the little flashlight attached to your helmet, glancing down at yourself.

You’re still strapped in your seat. Nothing seems to be broken. There are no holes in your suit, nothing holding you down except for the safety belts.

But something’s different.

You glance around you, the aircraft’s aisles free of clutter thanks to how well you strap things down in zero gravity.

Gravity.

Experimentally, you reach for another one of the helmets, unhooking the latches and allowing them to fall away.

They fall.

They don’t float.

The helmet clatters to the ground with a loud bang.

“Specialist?”

You startle at the voice in your headset. You take a deep breath to calm your racing heart. “Namjoon?”

You hear him sigh. “Good, you’re okay.” A pause. “You are okay, right?”

“I think so?” you question, patting yourself down. Your stomach is a little iffy and you’re pretty sure you peed a little, but you’re...yeah, you’re okay. “Are you?”

“I’m okay,” he confirms, a rustling sound coming from somewhere up front. “I think...we should...I mean--”

“Namjoon, what happened?”

There’s a prolonged silence, one that leads you to think things are really not as okay as he says they are.

“Joon?”

“We -- we crashed,” he mutters, sounding a little astonished.

“Into what?” You’re dumbfounded. The only thing for miles is stars. Stars and space rock, just like you told your commander. How in the hell did you crash?

When Mission Specialist Kim Namjoon doesn’t answer, you grind your teeth together. “Joon?”

“Come see for yourself.”

You have a feeling, a sinking feeling that starts in your chest and drops all the way down into your stomach. Your stomach rolls and you have to fight down the bile in your throat. You don’t like the sound of his voice, don’t like the fact he won’t tell you what’s going on. You don’t like not knowing if your life is in danger or not.

Part of you doesn’t want to know what you’ll find when you get to the front of the ship. The other, the scientist in you that is always curious, is dying to know.

You quickly undo the straps holding you down and get to your feet, a little unsteady after so long of being in zero gravity. The floor of the ship feels weird beneath the soles of your military-grade boots, heavy in a way you’ve been mostly unfamiliar with for the past two years.

You give yourself a moment to adjust. Your entire body feels heavy and when you move to put the oxygen tank on your back, that feels heavy too.

You grip the straps of your tank tightly, nervously, as you slowly make your way to the front. The ship really isn’t that long, only having enough space to hold up to four people at a time with enough storage space for a short trip away from the station. But it still takes you a minute or two to get from one end to the other, passing by the little sleep pods on either side of you, meant more for convenience than comfort.

When you reach your colleague, you notice that he, too, has donned his helmet and oxygen tank and is staring out the front window. He doesn’t turn to you as you approach, although you’re sure he can hear you coming, and when you step up behind him you see why.

In front of you, glowing under the light of a moon is a hill covered in what appears to be grass and flowers. Instead of green, the grass gives off a bluish, purple hue and looks almost cottony. It bounces and shifts, as if swaying in a breeze. The flowers’ stems stretch and weave high into the sky, as high as some of the tallest sunflowers back home. Their petals are a deep purple and appear larger than your hands, each flower having at least seven petals that stretch into a trumpet shape, with red stigmas sticking out of the center.

An excitement you haven’t felt in the two years on the space station tickles at your chest, fingers itching to reach out and touch. To see if they’re really as soft as they appear. To see if they contain similar genetics to the plant life back home.

“Holy shit,” you breathe, enamored.

“Yeah,” Namjoon sighs.

“We should—“ You start turning toward the door, but Namjoon grabs your arm. As you shift on your feet, you notice the unsteadiness of the ground beneath you. It sways.

The two of you pause, looking at each other in mild panic before you’re carefully approaching the front of the ship. You lean a little closer to the control panel, aiming the flashlight on your suit directly in front of your spacecraft. There, just underneath you, is a pool of deep green. Little flecks of iridescent particles float across its surface, sharp rocks sticking out of the water in front of you, just offshore.

Your eyes widen.

“We should call this in,” Namjoon finishes your previous thought.

You feel your cheeks flush, suddenly thankful for the tinted visor of your helmet, because you hadn’t even thought of that. “Right, yeah.”

Namjoon laughs softly and sits back down in his chair, a little clumsy due to the gravity and the unsteadiness of the craft, and presses a few buttons on the dashboard. He frowns when nothing clicks on, hits another button, and tries again.

The spacecraft remains eerily silent and you glance toward the oxygen reader on the wall, still displaying a steady 93%, but no longer ticking.

There’s another sinking feeling in your stomach. “Joon?”

He’s silent for a moment, gloved hands flexing over the controls. “Our communication systems must have been impacted by the crash. We’ll need to check the rest of the ship for damage too.”

You nod stiffly. You’ve trained for this, gone through extensive procedures so both of you know exactly what to do in situations like this, but you still feel like you’re on the verge of a panic attack.

Yes, you’d wanted to discover something -- and you’re still dying to step out of this spacecraft and get a sample from those flowers -- but what’s a discovery without anyone to report it to? What if you can’t get the comms up and running and you never make it back to Baldur?

Namjoon must sense your mounting panic somehow, because he gets to his feet and squeezes your shoulder, the pressure light through your suit. “It’ll be okay. We have extra oxygen tanks if we need them. We have enough food to last us a few days if we portion it out. If they don’t hear back from us by then, they’ll send someone.”

Right, yeah, totally. His logic makes sense.

You offer a tight-lipped smile you know he can’t see and pat his hand. “Right. You get to work on the comms. I’ll go check the engines.”

“Okay,” he takes a step back from you, watching as you turn toward the back of the ship. “And Specialist?”

You turn your head. “Mm?”

“Be careful.”

Your lips quirk into a smile. “Aren’t I always?”

Houston, think we got some problems, find somebody who can solve ‘em 🎵

You groan to yourself as the song pops into your head unbidden, tossing away the pliers you’d been trying to fix the ship with. Although the engines are fine, the rest of the ship seems to have suffered from the crash and you’ve been trying to get things up and running again for the past few hours. But no amount of tweaking of wires or reconnecting power boards would work, and you have the sinking suspicion that whatever body of liquid you’d landed in was responsible.

You feel yourself starting to sweat so close to the heat of the engines and adjust the temperature with a dial inside your suit. The suits really weren’t designed for comfort -- not really -- but the ones you wear now are lightyears more comfortable than the ones you used to wear, material much more pliable and accepting of movement. You remember the ones you wore during training, so stiff and heavily insulated you could barely breathe. You’d sweat a lot during those days, practically baking under the hot lights of the training station.

These are much better, making repairing the ship more manageable, but no easier.

You huff and push to your feet, dusting yourself off. You’re still not sure what to make of this whole gravity thing, your legs feeling weak after not carrying your weight for so long. You’re also finding yourself having to readjust, so used to handling tools and manipulating wires mid-float. The mere weightiness of everything is a shock to your system.

You press the button for your comms. “Joons?”

A crackle of noise, then, “Go ahead, Specialist.”

You steel yourself. “Do you want the good news or the bad news first?”

Silence, a sigh, and then, “I have some bad news too.”

Your heart sinks. “The comms?”

“Yeah, they’re completely dead. No power source at all. What’d you find?”

“Well,” you breathe out slowly. “The engines are fine--”

“That’s great!”

“--but the mainframe was damaged in the crash. It might be repairable, but--”

“But it’s beyond your expertise,” he finishes for you, voice conveying his disappointment.

“Unfortunately.”

The two of you settle into a silence that’s weighed down by the severity of your situation. Your mind races for a solution. You wish you had paid more attention in your tech classes, wish you had read more manuals and studied the schematics of these things a bit more. You wish you were more prepared than this.

“Joonie?” you ask, your voice so quiet you’re not sure he hears you.

“Yeah?”

“What are we going to do?”

You’re not sure he has the answers. You’re not sure there is a good answer. Stuck on an unfamiliar planet with no way to contact the space station, your options are rather limited.

“I don’t know,” he admits quietly. “I guess we wait it out, hope that someone comes looking for us.”

His solution doesn’t comfort you. In fact, it does the opposite. You’re not so sure just waiting around is a good idea. You could be waiting for a while before anyone decides to send out a search party, let alone find a planet you didn’t know existed.

“Okay,” you agree, but only because there’s not much else you can do. Namjoon might not know entirely how to fix the situation, but he’s still the Mission Specialist and, therefore, the leader of your excursion.

Pushing away the doubts eating away at you, you try to remain optimistic as you head back into the Navigation Bay. As you pass by the sleeping pods, you glance at the frozen oxygen reader on the wall, still reading a firm 93%. You’re not so sure anymore whether you can trust it, knowing how finicky the tech gets without a steady stream of power.

You pause before you can make it to Navigation, bending at your knees and crouching over. You pull your arms from inside your sleeves and bury your face in your hands inside your suit, pressing firm fingertips to your eyes as they begin to sting.

You can’t cry. You won’t.

Your suit isn’t meant for crying and you need to conserve oxygen.

Even telling yourself this, you feel the tears slide down your cheeks. You sniff and swipe at them, feeling your heart ache in a way you don’t let it very often.

For the first time in two years, you find yourself wanting to go home. You want to be curled up in a nice, comfortable bed, surrounded by the softest sheets and fluffiest pillows. You want to be sipping from a soothing cup of tea or a nice glass of wine. You don’t want to be stuck alone in space, with no idea of when or how or even if you’re going to get home.

You feel a hand on your shoulder and startle, swiping furiously at your eyes and moving to get up. Namjoon tsks into your comms and eases you back down, wrapping his long arms around you. The hug is awkward and not at all as comforting as he probably intends, helmets bumping and suits crinkling, but it’s nice. It’s nice because you know you’re not entirely alone. It’s nice because you know you have Namjoon.

For the time being, it’s enough.

A faint breeze sways the trees, disrupting the long, blue, tail-like branches and making their fan-shape crowns shutter. You listen in awe to the sound they make, like little fountains of water clattering to the ground. A faint whistle floats through the air as the thin wisps of leaves lift from the ground and reach with the wind, stretching and swaying through the air. Your body yearns to feel it softly kiss your skin like the sweet ether of earth.

You want to taste the air on your tongue, the way you would back home. Would it contain salty undertones like the air near the ocean? Or would it taste sour, sweet, or even foul? You’re curious, but not yet willing to take the risk of removing your helmet. You’re not sure whether the air here is breathable or, better yet, whether any of the flora and fauna you’re observing is poisonous. Although seemingly earth-like in composition, you have yet to actually test the biology of anything, most of your equipment still waiting for you on Space Station Baldur.

In the three days you’ve been on Planet X, as Namjoon has begun referring to it, you have yet to see or hear any signs of a rescue crew. The skies, a brilliant shade of green and deep blue, are quiet, barren apart from the smattering of stars and the oblong moon, tinted blue through the planet’s atmosphere.

With Planet X’s crust and stratosphere so much closer to the galaxy overhead, the stars appear brighter and bigger, with the climate being significantly cooler than the earth’s surface. Interestingly, you’ve noticed that the plant life compensates for this and, as you run your gloved hands over the branches and leaves of the trees, you feel a significant heat radiate from them. You know of plants back home that generate heat like this, like the Eastern skunk cabbage and Voodoo Lilly, but the few that do only do so to promote flower pollination. Without ample time to observe the vegetation on this planet and their life cycles, you’re only left to wonder whether their heating mechanisms are for pollination or for surviving in such cool temperatures.

“Specialist?”

You touch your hand to your comms, thankful that at least some of your tech is still working, even if it sometimes fritzes out and all you hear is static. “Yeah, Joon?”

“I think a storm is brewing on the horizon.”

You glance in the direction the ship is angled and search the skies. Sure enough, a tumultuous cloud is looming closer, strong gusts of winds bending flower stems and tree trunks to the ground.

You let out a little sigh as your little excursion, the furthest you’ve dared to venture out, is cut cut short and quickly pack up the small case of samples you’ve been collecting. Recycling used food containers, you’ve managed to collect close to fifteen samples of local organisms so far. Although you have nothing to examine them with yet, you hold out hope that a ship will arrive for you soon.

After all, they had to have noticed you’ve gone dark by now, that you’re no longer locatable through your ship’s GPS. Surely they’ve realized something is wrong.

Pushing the thoughts aside, you quickly board Mikrocosm, the ship having drifted with the currents of the lake you’d landed in and washed ashore early on your second day here. As is routine by now, you store your case of samples in a little nook just outside the decompression chamber before stepping inside. The outer door shifts closed behind you and you begin the process of decontamination, spraying yourself top to bottom with a hose attached to the wall. A fan kicks on, controlled from inside the ship, and dries you as the foreign air surrounding you is vacuumed out of the bay. Once finished, the inside door hisses and unlocks, allowing you to walk through to meet Namjoon on the other side.

The muffled, filtered breathing of your colleague greets you and he motions you further into the ship, handing you a pouched protein drink. Relief washes over you as you sink into your seat in the Navigation Bay, kicking your feet up on the control panel that’s currently rendered useless.

Namjoon glares at your mostly clean boots on his equipment, but doesn’t say anything as he hooks his own protein shake to a tube in his suit, hands disappearing inside to no doubt attach the other end to his mouth.

“Anything interesting today?” he asks, words muffled around the tube he’s placed between his teeth, maneuvering one arm back into his sleeve to release the clamp on his feeding tube.

“Nothing new,” you sigh, following suit and getting your meal prepared. Running low on supplies, the two of you had begun rationing things out even more, only allowing yourselves one protein shake a day with drinks of water in between. The nutritionist in you knows the dangers of such a restrictive diet, but any more and you’d surely run out before help comes.

If it comes.

Your eyes drift to the oxygen reader on the wall, still frozen on 93%. The sight doesn’t render you broken the way it had when you’d first arrived, but it still makes your heart trip unsteadily every time you see it. It serves as a stark reminder that your lives have come to a screeching, unsettling halt that’s almost completely out of your control.

A rumble rolls through the planet’s atmosphere, shaking the ground beneath you, and your gaze shifts to the oncoming storm. You know very little about the planet you’re on, including what you should expect from those dark, foreboding clouds.

The sound of rain hitting metal echoes through the room and you glance above you, hoping your ship is strong enough to withstand whatever is falling from the sky. Judging by what little you do know of weather on earth, you think the lake your ship crash landed in is a good indication that whatever this planet’s rain is made of, at least, won’t melt it.

You hope.

“It’s green,” Namjoon mutters, sounding a bit awed as he points a finger to the window. You follow his gaze toward the raindrops skittering across the plastic casing of your windshield, green rivulets flowing across the surface and sliding down.

“It’s pretty,” you comment, eyes moving from the drops to the moon beyond, slowly disappearing behind the storm clouds. You’re a little puzzled once it’s gone, still able to see just as clearly, and it takes you a moment to realize there’s other light sources on the planet.

The trees and grass you’d been so raptly examining slowly fade into light, like street lights flickering on at night, branches and stems glowing a delicate and muted green.

You purse your lips, moving your feet off the panel to sit forward in your seat and observe them. Even at night, the moon usually shined so brightly that you never noticed the plants’ luminescence before. You make a mental note of it, wondering if it has anything to do with the heat that radiates from them.

“Damn,” Namjoon breathes next to you, and you can only nod in response. Every moment you spend here is an adventure, something to be astounded or perplexed by.

You watch in silence as the flowers stretch with the wind, up toward the sky, trumpeted petals opening as if reaching for the nutrients the rain provides.

“Do they...seem alive to you?” you wonder aloud, the sight so similar to a pair of lips parting for food that it leaves you feeling a little uneasy.

Namjoon turns to you, is quiet for a moment, before you see his shoulders rise and fall. “I don’t know, maybe? It wouldn’t be so crazy, would it? We’re on an alien planet.”

Your lips twitch at his teasing tone. “True. I just--”

You pause, tongue coming out to wet your lips. It brushes the straw of your forgotten protein shake and you flinch back in surprise. You relax when you realize what it is and shake your head at yourself. You can’t help but be a little jumpy. Ever since you arrived on Planet X, you’ve felt like something was...off. Like there’s something more to what’s in front of you than what you see.

And, dare you admit, you feel like you’re being watched.

A sudden whirring sound jolts you from your thoughts and you spin around to face the wall. Your eyes scan the area in front of you, unable to find the source of the noise until you spot movement out of the corner of your eye. Eyes shifting to the oxygen reader on the wall, you’re surprised to find that it now says 100%, the red needle shaking and quivering, as if trying to continue its ascent to a number that doesn’t exist.

“Uh, Joon?”

“Specialist, get down!”

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#bts fanfiction #bts fanfic #kim namjoon #fanfiction #sci-fi #bts au fic #bts au #bts x reader #bts space au #alien bts au #btsrunmylife.story

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mikkomacko · 4 years

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Sweet As Honey 14

Harry may be hurt with y/n, but that doesn't mean he doesn't know what's best for her, and it doesn't mean he won't take care of her. Which is why he made her take a break from everything. He knows she's hard-working and always eager to please, but after that weekend back in his hometown, he knew they both needed some time for just them. Now that she's starting her second trimester she's been more tired and the now visible baby in her belly is starting to bother her with cravings.

Cravings that have him spreading cinnamon butter on honey rolls at midnight, and sprinkling extra cheese on her omelette in the morning, and frying excessive amounts of chicken for dinner. It's a bit annoying, but it's also his baby he's feeding. The tiny, helpless little baby that's just getting a taste for life, that's relying on him for care and love and protection. And careless or not, that's his wife that he's taking care of. The beautiful strong woman that's creating life in her tummy, that's growing the big family he's wanted ever since he fell in love with her.

But that doesn't mean he's not annoyed when he's woken up by her wiggling out of bed, and he rolls onto his back, blinking the fuzziness away and watching her quietly leave their bedroom. He knows exactly where she's going and what she's getting, because he always knows when it comes to her.

He groans, frustrated that his brain and body are telling him to just go back to sleep, but his heart is telling him to follow her, to follow his baby. Sleepy scowl on his face, Harry leaves the room, silently trailing her into the kitchen where he finds exactly how he knew he would.

She's sat on the countertop, leaning back against the cabinets in the corner where the two tops meet, legs stretched out by the sink with a bag of puffy Hot Cheetos in her lap. Her eyes are droopy and pink, and she lazily digs around in the bag for a chip.

Her gaze moves to him when she finally notices his presence, lips quirking up sleepily. He fishes out a glass and fills it with water, placing it on the counter next to her because it's only a matter of time before the chips get too hot.

"Deja Vu, huh?" She mururms quietly as he leans back against the cabinet. His arms cross over his chest, head bobbing sluggishly. He looks around the kitchen, at the freshly washed baby bottles and the stack of dirty bibs on the floor in front of the laundry room. He thinks back to when it was just them here, resting in these exact same spots with the same chips in her hands. The only difference now, is the tiny human sleeping upstairs.

"S'almost exactly the same." Harry agrees, looking over at her growing belly. It's not actually visible under her baggy shirt, but he knows it's there. Ever since he noticed it a few days ago, it's pretty much all he can see.

"Yeah, almost."

Her tone has Harry's head snapping towards her, eyebrows pinching together. She sounds almost bitter that they're in this spot again. And if she's not bitter, she's at least upset by it.

"Why'd ya say it like tha'?" Harry demands gruffly. Y/n lifts her water up, red fingerprints sticking to the glass like a messy toddler. She frowns, setting down the glass and lazily wiping the her mouth with the back of her hand.

"Like what?" She scoffs, "like how I'm feeling?"

His skin prickles, veins getting hot with either annoyance or anger, and he wishes he had just gone back to sleep. He doesn't want to fight with her but it seems like she's pushing his buttons on purpose.

"Like you wish we weren't here." Harry mutters, nose flaring angrily. He squeezes his eyes shut, focusing on the black behind his eyelids to try and calm down.

"I didn't mean it like that," she sighs, "I meant it like it's not the same. It's not even close to the same. If this were like last time, you wouldn't be looking at me like you want to hit me."

Her words make him tense, anger freezing and molding into a numbing panic. Hit her? He would never even think of hitting her?

"Don't look like tha'," Harry says, sounding more defeated than he thought he would. "could never look at you like tha' because I'd never want to do tha' to you."

Y/n closes up the chips, reaching over her head to put them back in the cabinet. She wipes her hands off on the dishtowel next to her.

"Well something's different," she dumps the rest of her water in the sink. "and I don't know what I did to make it change, but I hate it."

Harry watches her through sad eyes as she slips off the counter. She looks sad too, he thinks, as she tip-toes to press a kiss to his cheek, and he reaches out to grab her hand and bring her back to him but he's too late, and she slips out of reach and up the steps.

After staying at home for days on end, Harry thought it might be nice to go out again, even if it's to go to Anne and Gemma's apartment. He, however, is not feeling particularly nice.

"The apartment looks wonderful!"

Anne practically melts at y/n's compliment, hand coming to rest on her chest as she blushes.

"It's nothing compared to your home, but we really like it." Anne says kindly, and Harry rolls his eyes. After living with them for months, Anne is suddenly all about kind small talk.

Y/n follows Anne out of the living room and around a wall into what Harry assumes is the kitchen. He doesn't follow, instead carrying Arlo over to the couch and flopping down onto the springy cushions. Arlo sits back on Harry's thighs, sock clad toes hooking around his back, and his head swivels around with big eyes as he takes in the unfamiliar place.

"S'not bad, huh?" Harry whispers, unbuttoning Arlo's coat and slipping it off his shoulders. Arlo let's him wiggle his arms free, and then he's smacking his palms down into his Harry's thighs.

“Daddy,” Arlo murmurs, turning his gaze to Harry. Harry manages to slip off his jacket too, keeping his eyes on Arlo. The last thing he needs is Arlo taking a tumble off his lap.

"Let's go eat dinner bug." Harry groans, rising from the couch and carrying Arlo into the dining room and kitchen. Gemma smiles at him in hello, and Harry just nods. He sits next to y/n, Arlo sat in his lap again and his wife places a plate of chicken, mashed potatoes, and extra peas in front of him.

"Share with your son." She says, kissing the top of his head. It's uncomfortable when everyone sits down, Harry trying to just focus on feeding Arlo small bites of potatoes, but he can feel Anne and Gemma staring at him. He's reminded of that first dinner they had together, when he was avoiding gazes and y/n was really the only one talking. It makes his stomach twist.

"Thank you for dinner!" Y/n says politely, helping Gemma stack dirty dishes. "It was wonderful!"

"Of course!" Anne says bashfully. "It was the least we could do after all the meals you fed us."

Harry bites back a frustrated growl, adjusting Arlo's little socks to look busy. He feels y/n elbow him, undoubtedly telling him to thank them. He knows he shouldn't say it, knows it's petty and stupid, but he says it anyway. Even if he knows it'll make y/n mad.

"Thanks for getting out of my house."

He's met with silence, and he stands back up, carrying Arlo to the living room where he can be alone with his baby.

They're barely two feet from Arlo's room, the door cracked in case he wakes up, when she hounds on him.

"You really shouldn't have treated them that way Harry."

Harry tugs his tee-shirt over his head, rolling his eyes at how cross she sounds. Of course she's still choosing their side, of course they've begun to take someone else away from him. He throws his shirt towards the closet, falling onto the edge of the bed.

"Can treat 'em however I want." He grunts, pulling off his shoes and angrily tossing those towards the closet too. They hit the wall with a bang.

"If you want to fix this with them you have to stop being so closed off and intimidating!"

He huffs, watching her storm into the closet and hears begin digging around for pajamas. He stands up and wiggles his pants off.

"Maybe I don't want to fix things anymore!" Harry hisses loudly, trying to be conscious of Arlo sleeping one door down.

"Are you kidding me?" She chuckles bitterly, the sound muffled by the walls but still enough to make his stomach twist. He hates fighting with her, really fucking hates it, and no matter how hard he tried not to do it, she still drug him in.

"You want to go back to the way things were before? You want the nightmares and panic attacks and trauma to stay?"

Harry snatches the shorts he threw on the bed this morning, tugging them on aggressively. "I want to stop getting my bloody hopes up! Thought we could fix things, thought that we could maybe be normal but they can't stop hiding things from me!"

Y/n scoffs bitterly, stepping out of the closet in her pajamas. She tugs her hair up into a bun. "Hiding things?"

"Yes hiding things! You don't hide something like a bloody house burning down from your son!"

"And you don't hide not wanting to have kids from your wife!"

Harry stops abruptly, eyebrows knitting even closer together. He takes in her heaving chest and blazing eyes, and even though he knows he's probably on the verge of crying, all he can focus on is the fact that she's turning everything around on him. She's bringing up things that don't even matter.

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

"You hide things too Harry!" She exclaims, and her fingers work on pulling down her bun even though she just tied it up. "It happened in the past but it was important and you didn't tell me! You can't treat them like this when you do the same thing!"

It's irrational. He knows it, and he knows his anger is misplaced right now but she's standing in front of him and pushing him. "I can treat them however the fuck I want to and I can hide whatever the fuck I want to!"

Silence. Absolute silence takes over the room, save from his harsh breathes and y/n sniffling. She doesn't even respond, doesn't get a chance to because Arlo's begun wailing from his room. Before he can even think of going to get the baby he just woke up, she's slipping out of the room.

Harry's heart pounds in his chest, throbbing in his ears and he's already dreading the headache he'll have in about ten minutes. He falls back onto the bed, running a hand through his hair and taking a few deep breaths. Arlo's crying has ceased and he can't even hear y/n upstairs. Assuming she's taken him to the living room for a feeding, Harry pushes himself off the bed and out of the room.

The living room TV is on, and he finds y/n on the couch with Arlo tucked into her neck, snoring. His irritation bubbles again, wishing he'd been fast enough to snag Arlo so he could be the one getting relaxing cuddles.

"You're sleeping down here then?" He asks, monotonously.

She sinks further into the couch. "Obviously."

He huffs. "And ya get both both babies now, huh?"

"It's fair, since apparently I'm the only one that wants them."

He closes his eyes, taking a few deep breaths. "Fine." He spits through clenched teeth, stomping back upstairs and into the empty bedroom. He tugs down the blankets on the bed and climbs in. And when y/n doesn't come up for the night, he just hugs her pillow to his chest, hating that it feels like their falling back into old habits.

Harry comes back his run, sweaty and sad, brain replaying his fight with y/n. No matter how much he extended his run, or how loud he blasted his music, he couldn't turn off his brain. And it made him even more irritated, enough so that he's ready to scream at her again when he enters the house.

But he doesn't get a chance before she's storming in front of him, purse on her shoulder and car keys in her hand.

"Car, now!"

He opens his mouth, argument on the tip of his tongue until he sees the stormy look in her eyes and the clench of her jaw. He ignores the fact that he probably smells and that his shirt is sticking to his body, and follows her to the car like a kicked puppy.

Y/n is silent as she drives, knuckles white on the steering wheel. Harry nervously plucks at his sticky shirt, blasting the vents at himself to try and cool down.

"Where's Arlo?" He asks timidly, afraid to set her off. He knows when to not upset her, no matter how much he may want to.

"Mom's." She says shortly.

The rest of the car ride is silent, and Harry tries not to fiddle too much as she basically ignores his presence. He doesn't speak up until he realizes where they're going.

"Don't need to be here-"

"Shut up and go inside." She interrupts, yanking the keys out of the ignition and climbing out of the car. Harry follows, head hanging low all the way to the receptionist's desk.

"Dr. Wells please."

She must have set up an appointment, because they're not even seated for five minutes before they're escorted into a familiar office. Y/n sits on the couch, huffing in irritation when Harry just stands and stares at her. He doesn't know why she's brought him here, or why she thinks he needs to be back.

"Please sit down Harry?"

"No," he crosses his arms over his chest, "don't want to. Don't need to."

He's not sure where Dr. Wells is, but he's glad he's not here to witness the way y/n crumbles in on herself, sniffling harshly. She buries her face in her hands, and his bones rattle with each rack of sobbing that shakes her.

"W-wha'?" Harry gasps, tripping over his own feet as he stumbles onto the couch next to her. He reaches for her arm, wanting to see her face and hold her, but she jumps up and steps away from him.

"Why does this have to be about you?" She wails, wiping at her splotchy cheeks. Harry sits dumbfounded on the couch, mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water.

"Did you ever think that this was for me? That I need to tell you how I'm feeling?"

She looks at him through wet eyes, bottom lip trembling. Her arms hug her belly protectively, and that's enough to have Harry welling up with his own tears. He never wants to make her feel like she has to protect herself from him.

"Baby," he pushes himself off the couch, cautiously tip-toeing closer. "baby ya can talk to me. Please-just-what's wrong?"

"I want you back." She whimpers, swiping under her red eyes again. Confusion twists his features, but he still manages to wrap his arms around her torso and bring her to his chest.

"M'here. Always been right here."

She shakes her head against his chest, hiccuping. "You're doing it again. Where you don't talk to me and you're upset all the time and it feels like you don't care about us anymore!"

Her honesty pushes out another flood of shaking and sobbing, and Harry squeezes her tighter. Tears sting his eyes, blurring his vision and he squeezes his eyes shut in agony. Her cries seem to echo painfully in his chest.

Clearing his throat, Harry presses his lips close to her ear to respond. “Of course I care about you! Care about you more than anything, you a-and Arlo and the baby are my everything.”

Y/n nuzzles her nose between his pecks, and he strokes his fingers through her hair to get her to calm down. When words fail him,he’s always had his actions.

“Why didn’t you tell me you don’t want kids?”

He almost chuckles. “Didn’t, baby, I didn’t want kids. Back when I was living in a house with an unstable mother and an abusive twat, and Gemma and I were fucked, I didn’t want kids,” he pulls back just enough to look down at her, “because I couldn’t see myself giving them the life they deserved. I was hurt, and stupid, and selfish, and I didn’t want another fucked up family.”

His trembling fingers wipe her cheeks, and it’s like bricks are lifted off his chest when he sees the sadness in her eyes instead of the cold, closed-off gleam she had earlier.

“What made you change your mind?”

His lips curl up tenderly. ‘You darling. Ya loved me, taught me to love, gave me dreams and hopes. Knew from the day I fell in love with ya that I was going to give you the prettiest babies ever,”

A smile stretches her lips, and she blinks bashfully. “We do make pretty babies.”

He giggles, pecking the soft skin between her eyebrows.”We do. Can’t wait to see what our new one looks like. If they get their mumma’s nose and my smile.”

She hums. laying her head in his chest again. “Maybe they’ll look just like Arlo, and everyone will think they’re twins.”

“Maybe,” he agrees, ‘but no matter who they look like, they’re going the mean the world to me, just like you and Arlo.”

She tilts her head up, chin tucked into his chest. “I know we do,but I just...”

He rubs her shoulder soothingly. “Just what?”

“I don’t want you to shut down on me again,” she says quietly, “you’ve accomplished so much, and I’m so proud of you. I don’t want you to be closed off again.”

He nods, shushing her softly when her bottom lip trembles again. “I know, I know. M’sorry,you’re right. It’s been hard since Gemma and Anne showed up, and then going back home, but m’gonna start being honest okay?”

She nods, pressing a sweet kiss into his jaw. “M’always on your side Harry,” she promises, “always going to support you and help you, but I can’t if you don’t tell me what you’re feeling.”

He nods, swallowing thickly. "Just didn't want to fight with ya, hate fighting with ya."

"I'd rather fight with you than feel like this, and I know you hate feeling like this too."

A trembling laugh leaves his lips, and she peppers a couple kisses to the side of his face. "Guess I just forgot, fell back into old ways."

Y/n nods, her hands snaking up to thread her fingers through the curls at the back of his neck. He eyes flutter shut, feeling her nails scratch his scalp. His shoulders slump under her touch, head burrowing into her neck and he focuses on the way their chests touch when he breathes in. Faintly, he hears the door to the room open, but he ignores it and so does she.

"I just can't believe they didn't tell me," he finally whispers, sullen at the reminder of his childhood home, and Anne and Gemma not telling him. He understands that it's hard to talk about, that Anne is really traumatized from the whole thing, but that was his home and his right to know.

"I think maybe they just didn't know how or when."

"Maybe when I told them I was taking you for a walk around the whole bloody town," he says bitterly, "as if I wouldn't want to go back."

Y/n hums, and he realizes she's begun to sway them back and forth soothingly. His lips quirk up, fingers tightening on her waist. "I'm not going to try to defend them or explain why, because this is their problem to fix. But I'll be there when you're ready to go to them and talk."

"Why were you so mad when I didn't want to talk to them?"

"Because I'm tired Harry, and I know your tired of this too. And I was being insensitive, but I just wanted to get that over with. I want our home to go back to normal."

Harry smacks kisses to her neck, squeezing her even tighter until he can feel her small bump against his stomach and it makes his heart flutter.

"It will darling, and it's going to stay that way."

Despite the bubbling and churning excitement in the pit of his belly, Harry feels lighter than he has in months. Arlo's feet dig into his thighs, plump belly pressed against his and eyes burning into Harry's. He's not sure what about his eyes have got Arlo so attentive, but he doesn't question it. He holds Arlo's thighs tightly, lips twitching as Arlo runs his tiny fingers through the beard Harry's got growing out. It's just long enough to no longer be prickly, instead soft little tuffs that Arlo's begun to enjoy playing with.

"Is daddy's beard your new toy, bub?" Y/n giggles, nudging Harry's foot with her own. Arlo coos, not tearing his eyes away from Harry. Almost a year since he first looked into those eyes, and they still leave him breathless.

"Styles?"

Harry stands up, shifting Arlo into his right arm and and taking y/n's hand in his left. They're lead back by a nurse, and Harry tries not to giggle while Arlo continues to play with beard. Y/n weight and height is taken down, then they're lead to an exam room where she's instructed to change. Harry settles into the chair next to the bed, sitting Arlo in his lap while his wife changes.

"Mumma," Arlo calls, swiveling his head to look at y/n. Harry gasps, placing a hand over his little eyes.

"Don't look at mumma while she's naked!"

His playful tone makes Arlo giggle, little hand reaching up to pull away his hand. Y/n snorts, putting on her paper gown. The doctor comes in, greetings Harry and Arlo with a wiggle of her fingers before going over routine questions with y/n. Harry snuggles Arlo into his chest, pressing kisses to the top of his head. He remembers doing this for Arlo, sitting in this chair and waiting to see if he was having a baby girl or boy. He remembers clutching y/n's hand with all his might because he was so nervous.

The ultrasound equipment is rolled out, and Harry immediately moves to the edge of the seat, eager to see his baby. Y/n reaches for his hand, and he happily takes it, squeezing her fingers when the jelly is spread on her tummy and the wand is placed on the underside of it. The steady thumping of two heartbeats fills the room, Arlo cooing gently at the noise and looking at y/n with curious eyes. He wasn't here the first time they heard the baby's heartbeat, but seeing him so interested is enough to make Harry's eyes sting with happy tears.

"There's your baby," the doctor cheers softly, adjusting the screen so Harry and y/n can get a good look at the human growing in y/n. Her hand squeezes the life out of his, and the doctor twists a knob that has the picture zooming in.

"Alright Styles family, are we ready to know the sex?"

"Yeah!" Harry blurts, cheeks reddening at the waver in his voice. His heart thumps loudly, biting his lip as y/n agrees too. Arlo squeezes Harry's arm in both his hands and Harry takes that as a yes too.

"Well, it looks like your healthy little one is once again, a baby boy!"

#sweet as honey #harry styles #fanfic #fanfiction #fluff #harry styles imagine #one direction #harry styles au #dad harry styles #daddy harry styles #boxer harry styles #angst #Harry and arlo

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lizardrosen · 3 years

Link

Let me, if not by birth, have lands by wit. All’s with me meet that I can fashion fit.

Songs with key lyrics under the cut!

Backstage Romance - Moulin Rouge

I want your horror, I want your design 'Cause you're a criminal as long as you're mine

Under My Skin - Jukebox the Ghost

And my family had a castle, way back when I would have lived there if they had more male children

You’re Gonna Go Far, Kid - Jonathan Young

With a thousand lies and a good disguise Hit 'em right between the eyes, hit 'em right between the eyes

The Room Where It Happens - Hamilton

God help and forgive me I wanna build something that's gonna outlive me

All Eyes On Me - Victor McKnight

So many experiments So many mistakes But I'll go all the way Til I'm in perfect shape (First the worst Maybe thirds the charm)

Run For Cover - The Killers

What are you waiting for, a kiss or an apology? You think by now you'd have an A in toxicology

Could Have Been Me - The Struts

I wanna taste love and pain Wanna feel pride and shame I don't wanna take my time Don't wanna waste one line

Nails For Breakfast, Tacks For Snacks - Panic! At The Disco

That's when you st-st-stutter something profound To the support on the line And with the way you've been talking Every word gets you a step closer to hell

You’re Dreaming - Wolf Parade

Another scene more shattered glass Every system in collapse A billion screens they move so fast but that’s not life

Like Real People Do - Hozier

I knew that look, dear: eyes always seeking Was there in someone that dug long ago

Young God - Halsey

If there's a light at the end, it's just the sun in your eyes I know you wanna go to heaven, but you're human tonight

Take It Easy (Love Nothing) - Bright Eyes

Now I do as I please and lie through my teeth Someone might get hurt, but it won't be me I should probably feel cheap but I just feel free... And a little bit empty

The Boys Are Too Refined - The Hush Sound

And if the timing is right (Ohh) To sneak off into the night (Ohh) I'll let myself be taken just for the thrill

Bâtard - Stromae

Han, pardon, monsieur ne prend pas parti Monsieur n'est même pas raciste, vu que monsieur n'a pas de racines D'ailleurs monsieur a un ami noir, et même un ami Aryen Monsieur est mieux que tout ça, d'ailleurs tout ça, bah ça n'sert à rien

Oxford Comma - Vampire Weekend

All your diction dripping with disdain Through the pain, I always tell the truth

Call Them Brothers - Regina Spektor

That's it, it's split - it won't recover Just frame the halves and call them brothers

Wolf In Sheep’s Clothing (Acoustic) - Set It Off

Aware, aware, you stalk your prey With criminal mentality You sink your teeth into the people you depend on Infecting everyone, you're quite the problem

Counting Stars (instrumental) - Simply Three

I feel something so wrong doing the right thing I couldn't lie, couldn't lie, couldn't lie Everything that drowns me makes me wanna fly

Young And Vicious - Night Terrors of 1927

I saw the fakes, the forgeries The verdicts, guilty pleas Erased the names, wrote in our own Shining new history

My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark

I've got the scars from tomorrow and I wish you could see That you're the antidote to everything except for me Through a constellation of tears on your lashes Burn everything you love then burn the ashes

Afraid - The Neighborhood

When I wake up, I'm afraid Somebody else might take my place When I wake up, I'm afraid Somebody else might end up being me

Dear Dictator - Saint Motel

And at the trial, there'll be no jury And all the dead are gonna play witness Not too late to say you're sorry It's too late to truly mean it

Angel of Small Death and the Codeine Scene - Hozier

Freshly disowned in some frozen devotion No more alone or myself could I be Lurched like a stray to the arms that were open No shortage of sordid, no protest from me

High Tide Rising - Fox

There's a big storm comin' And I don't care So ooh, baby Just gimme my ticket to hell

Younger - The Mountain Goats

Set the torch aflame Call the night by name Stake out your dark position

Solitary One - Murder by Death

You've got your books You've got your shows But who you really are Nobody knows You just carry on 'Til you're gone

Highest Building - Anna Tivel

In the palm of your hand is a worn out dollar You stole from a man on the subway steps With a cardboard sign said thank the father But you ain’t spoke no thank you yet

Running Up That Hill - Ruby & the Rogues

You don't want to hurt me But see how deep the bullet lies Unaware I'm tearing you asunder Ooh, there is thunder in our hearts

Peacocks - The Mountain Goats

Hands grasping and groping Seizing opportunity right where it lies The sky will fall, we will rise

Watch It Crash - Toh Kay

It said We can't just blame it on our mothers Claim everything they did was always wrong And there ain't not turning back when our train is off its track And there's nothing we can do but watch it crash

Seven Nation Army - Zella Day

And I'm bleeding, and I'm bleeding, and I'm bleeding Right before the lord All the words are gonna bleed from me And I will think no more

I’m Gonna Win - Rob Cantor

It’s hard to be charming and smart and disarming It’s hard to pretend you’re the best It’s hard to fulfill everyone’s expectations It’s hard to keep up with the rest

#king lear #edmund #shakespeare #i'm very proud of this playlist and i have lear brainrot so i just keep relistening over and over #as with all my playlists it's always potentially under construction but i think the current lineup is pretty much how it's going to stay #me: this playlist will stay pretty much how it is #also me: adds ten more songs to the playlist

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caithelps · 3 years

Text

For Your Entertainment by Adam Lambert RP Sentence Starters Part 4 (feel free to change name(s), pronouns, etc as needed): Find part 1 here, part 2 here, part 3 here

Master Plan:

“You run away from everything that you fear”

“So afraid, don't wanna be a part of it”

“You see the fake in every thing that is real”

“You hate the paradox”

“You put us in a box”

“We don't define what makes us right or wrong, waste of time and we're just livin' it”

“I wanna see you, touch you, one-on-one”

“Won't stop until we're done”

“We've only just begun”

“We are the face of a new generation”

“We are the ones who have no reservation”

“Don't give a damn about your cold calculation”

“Welcome to the master plan”

“Don't care if you understand”

“Your skin is burnin' at the sight of me”

“Your mask can't hide what you're thinkin'”

“Don't ask, don’t tell”

“Just take what you need”

“I'm an open book”

“So go on and take a look”

“There's you, there's me”

“I feel your energy”

“I hope you'll see

“Things ain't what they used to be”

“Look at the face”

Down the Rabbit Hole:

“Break out all the mechanical”

“Step right up to the freaky and tangible”

“Hands uncuffed, take the leash on this animal”

“If it’s gettin' hyphy, hit me with a night stick”

“Slip right into your stripper shoes”

“Roll the dice, I got snake eyes and déjà vu”

“Poppin' off, fire melted with bally-hoo?”

“Tune in, turn on"

“Drop out”

“Going down the rabbit hole”

“Get away from all we know”

“Come on, follow”

“Come on and follow me”

“Even hoes and gigolos”

“Quick, slow, high or low”

“You’re never going to know for sure”

“See in stereo”

“Catnip and honey, teatime and all over town”

“All over town”

“Houses of candy, build 'em up and then burn 'em down”

“Burn 'em down, just burn 'em down”

“It melts in your face and not in your arm”

“It starts in the bass and it ends in a crystal ball”

“Disco rodeo”

“My kaleidoscope”

“Cleopatra knows”

“What's down the rabbit hole”

Voodoo:

“Moonshine on the bayou”

“Love shrine, break the taboo”

“I wanna know what's in your potion”

“Bound by total devotion”

“I was looking for love all over”

“You're the hunter and I'm your prey”

“Now I'm lost in a love hangover”

“I try to leave, but I have to stay”

“It's voodoo under your spell”

“Swamp sings over the bazaar”

“Snake bites, aligning stars”

“I'm enraptured, there is no cure”

“No sanctuary from your allure”

“I was looking for love all over”

“The voodoo that you do is all that you can do”

“To make me into your fool”

“When you do your voodoo I'm just like a doll that your pins keep pushing into”

“So every time I try to break this trance”

“I'm just so afraid I'll miss my chance”

“To be bewitched by the bayou”

“I just gotta say I want your hex”

“I don't wanna live without your hex”

“I'm so obsessed with your sexiness”

Can’t Let You Go:

“Guess it was not meant to be”

“It's not as bad as it seems”

“It only burns when I breathe"

“You saw the way that I fell”

”I'm better off by myself”

“That's the tale I like to tell”

“It's not that easy for me to say goodbye”

“Everything in me, wants you back in my life”

“Can't let you go”

“It feels like the dawn of the dead, like bombs going off in my head”

“Never a moment of rest"

“Nothing kills more than to know”

“That this is the end of the road”

“Wish I could just find a way to have all your memories erased”

“'Cause constantly they're haunting me”

#rph #sentence starters #rp starters #ask meme #rp meme #starters*

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operator-amelia · 3 years

Text

Last Call, Amelia

You know, chances are you'll never see this.

I know how this goes. I've even been here before. Last time was Plague Star. Things were...well, I won't say dire, but looking like they could get that way. I got this feeling. Us Tenno, especially after we wake from the Second Dream, we never really "die." Sure, some of us get tired. Get old. Return to the Void, you know.

Actually, I bet you don't. I bet if you're reading this, I'm the first Tenno we've lost in your time. Sorry it had to be me, I'm sure that's rough.

What the hell am I doing...

Like I've said, I've been here before. Had this feeling, like...like I've been listening to my favorite song, and it's about to end. Had it last with Plague Star, and you know, that went off without a hitch. Thought we would lose, thought it'd come down to evacuating Cetus, turning the Plains into a glass floor, but...it didn't. We didn't lose anybody, so I guess that feeling is just a trick my brain plays on me. Maybe some kind of deja-vu. History doesn't repeat itself, but it rhymes, kinda. Maybe Plague Star lined up too well with a bad beat from before the Dream.

Point is, with this Thanatos business and what happened to Misha...it's getting to be pretty final in my head. So just...I'm gonna say something here and it's not gonna matter, but don't feel bad about this. I knew this was coming. I expected it.

You're gonna feel bad anyways. That's fine. But on the off chance you don't, I'm not offended. I'm happy for you. Happy you're dealing with this better than I dealt with Rosalee.

There are things about being a Tenno I haven't told you yet, consequences for waking from the Second Dream I haven't explained, because until now, they weren't your problem. Maybe that was silly. Maybe I should have told you before it became an issue, maybe I should stop going over all the maybe's before I forget to tell you what's what.

So here it is. The Tenno who wake from the Second Dream, each and every one of us, are haunted.

Started with Hayden, of course. Everything in this damn war seems to start with him. Stuck his nose in some Red Veil seances, found Rel. Set him free, and left us to deal with the fallout.

That's not fair, actually. He has to cope with it too. He's just...he handles it better than the rest of us. You know, maybe he just doesn't complain because he we blame him.

There's a sort of presence in the Void. Not the neural sentry, something..."primal" is too emotional. the word, "evil" assigns it agency...let's say "indifferent." It just is, and it doesn't change. That's important. The Man in The Wall doesn't change. If he changes, it's not him. It's you.

Might want to keep an eye on that.

Brace yourself for some...I don't know, cliche advice? Hate to use that word, but...I guess cliches have that reputation because they come up so much. Doesn't make it any less true.

So here's the deal: Nothing good lasts, and nothing bad ends.

Bit of a bummer, that. But it's true. And when you forget that, people die. Tenno die.

Rosalee dies.

Rosalee was...well, she was a lot of things. A native Mirage pilot, with a knack for Mesa's Peacekeepers as well. Always preffered the Akzani, you know, classic Mirage sidearms, but give her a Kraken or something like it and she'd take the head off of Lancers at ranges I'd steal a Vulkar for.

So yeah, she's a crack shot. Better than me, better than you, better than...pretty much anyone I've run missions with.

To me, well...that's a whole book in and of itself. We were a lot of things. I was her spotter for a few raids on the Plains. Ran tactical for her on a lot of solo runs, you know, data centers, hit-and-runs on the Plains to cover another team. She ran tactical for me on pretty much every gunfight I tell stories about.

Had a fling with her too. Cute. Real mean, in the fun-at-parties kinda way. I'll leave it at that. Like I said, nothing good lasts. She went for someone else, we were adults about it. Was a little strange, but the good times kept on rolling for a while. She went for this Ostron girl, started spending some more time in her own skin. This wasn't some city girl, either, she was militia. A fighter, like Rosalee, but...

Things got bad on the Plains after Plague Star. Thumpers started to become a regular issue, I don't know if Vay Hek had it in his back pocket or if they made some sort of advancement during the op we didn't see. Things got real dangerous for non-Operators, Rosalee's other half included.

What we had was stupid, silly fun, but the two of them...

Like I said. Nothing good lasts.

Konzu tried. He really did. Banned militia from doing excursions during the day, only let them out with an Awoken Tenno during the night. But...you get cocky, on the frontier. You spend enough time on the Plains and...you think you know em'. Maybe you do. And maybe you die anyways.

Point is, first ghoul purge happened, and her Iron Flower...didn't come home. Rosalee...got real quiet after that. Tended to leave her warframe in combat a lot more too.

You know, I should have seen it coming. Should have tried to make her stay. But I was just a fling, I'd buried those feelings for her and I guess buried some empathy along with it.

Most of the time, you know, you think you're going to go down swinging. I know Rosalee did. I wish she had. But, as it happened, well...

She knew she was tired. Hurting. I have no doubt now she was looking for an ending, but, you know, at the time, you see someone tearing through Grineer in their own skin, and you just think they're mad. They're after revenge, and she was, but I guess she was after some quiet too.

Sniper put a hole through her chest the size of a Rhino boot. Too far out to even tell you what tower it came from. No gunshot, just the sound barrier breaking and the impact. She kinda looked at me, eyes all blue, glowing brighter than I've ever seen them, and...

Like I said.

Found one of her journals, later on. We all keep them, just in case something like the Dream happens again. We don't have to try and guess who we were or what frame we were native to, you know. Pragmatism.

That Ostron girl, her Iron Flower. That's who the Man in The Wall decided she had to see, and he was right. She got tired. Got reckless. And returned to the Void.

Before you start connecting things that aren't there, this isn't what happens to me. My man in the wall is Rosalee, sure, but she's more of a nuisance than the kind of Siren the real Rosalee had to contend with. I don't want to go on, that's not why I'm writing this. Just...this Thanatos business makes me feel like I won't get a choice.

Nah, I'm telling you this because I want you to know that no matter how real he looks, if your Man in The Wall turns out to be me, it's not. It's the Indifference. The Man. Don't listen to it, honestly, don't even talk to it. I made that mistake. It's a hard habit to kill, once you start.

Once again, I'm not offended if it's someone else. For a lot of people, it's themselves, and that's fine. Don't listen to them, either.

Usually he only appears after some kind of trauma, though. For Hayden, it was the Grineer Queens. For me, it was watching Rosalee die. For you, well...there's a good chance it was losing me.

Don't sweat it. He's there for each of us. Don't expect anyone to tell us who our Man is, but...if you want to talk in, say, non-specific terms, Misha's there for you. So is Gaz. Cherno, well, he'll be having his own thing provided I'm gone.

There. That's done. I don't have to worry about you getting in over your head now.

And if something does happen, with Thanatos or sometime later...I'm pretty sure you're a Mesa native. You move like one anyways. Shoot like one too. Us gunslingers, well, we tend to get ideas about justice. About revenge. Do whatever keeps you going. Don't do anything on my behalf, I don't have those sorts of problems anymore.

As for Seeker, if it's still...intact, salvageable, it's yours. Enjoy it. Keep yourself safe. And remember:

Nothing good lasts.

Nothing bad ends.

-Aria, Warlord of Argent Dusk

#warframe #oc #operator cherno #operator amelia #operator aria #operator misha #operator hayden #The Man in The Wall #operator rosalee #plague star #ghoul purge #ostron #cetus #plains of eidolon #argent dusk #last call

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dizzyhslightlyvoided · 4 years

Text

This started as a @writing-prompt-s prompt-fill which basically just completely got out of hand. 6079 words, wow.

The Verge of Cyan Ruin

Nowadays, she was called Maria Los Angeles. She'd been nineteen when the Invaders first appeared, and now that she was twice as old, she was one of the best sharpshooters alive — the best, according to the men who weren't afraid to call a woman that. Either way, no one argued against the fact that she was one of the few who could actually stand up against the Invaders, and in the end, you couldn't pick and choose your saviors in the ruins of what was once California.

(When was nine, she'd dreamed of being 1. a hero, and 2. a princess, who could 3. fly. Well, she'd gotten one out of three, at least. Too bad it'd taken the end of the world. Being the savior wasn't all it was cracked up to be; there were no miracles in the world.)

This town had been the survivors' settlement of Modesto, but at the moment it could be better described as pandemonium. The nighttime air was full of screams as bolts of destruction rained down from black irregular polyhedrons covered in glowing teal markings, and an eerie blue-gray haze filled the sky above. On the horizon, the markings on the massive dark monoliths that dotted the landscape were glowing more brightly than they usually did. There were regular repetitive rolls of thunder.

Maria Los Angeles cut a striking figure as she strolled through the chaos, a heavyset Hispanic woman in comfortable traveling wear and a cowboy hat. Two ghastly shambling figures covered in crystals lunged towards her, firing spikes; she jumped to the side, firing back, and they both collapsed.

One of the polyhedrons began charging up to fire on a small bungalow which had already lost part of its roof. A few shots in just the right places on just the right glyphs on its sides, and the Floater shattered, raining down chunks the size of car doors.

She stuck her head through the house's front door. There was a brunette with glasses, boggling at the hole in the ceiling, crouched next to the corpse of an older man.

Maria paused. On the face of it, the woman looked like she was one more helpless civilian, of the kind Maria was here to protect. But there was just something about her, some hidden instinct poking at Maria's brain, that told Maria there was something more.

"Hey!" she called out. "Get off your ass and c'mon out here before another one comes to finish the job!"

The woman jerked her head towards Maria in surprise, as if she was getting deja vu, and unsteadily got to her feet and staggered over.

Maria looked the woman over. She was in her mid thirties, and she had piercing gray eyes. "I'm Maria Los Angeles, and I'm gonna get you out of this town," said Maria. "What's your name? Can you shoot?"

The woman stuttered for a moment, but then said, "Ella, uh, Walden." She wobbled slightly. "... and 'can I shoot' is ... uh ... 'five more minutes, mom'."

Maria smirked. She could see that this woman was going to go places, if she could maintain a sense of humor in a situation like this. "Well, I won't force you to do something if you just can't," she said, "but here." She handed Ella one of her spare guns. "Let's work on gettin' you out of this town, 'fore anything else."

"Right," Ella said weakly, hefting the gun and looking it over.

And then she shifted her posture slightly, and it was like the gun was an extension of her body.

Maria raised her eyebrows, and nodded in approval. Good. But now was not the time to dawdle. She wasn't a miracle worker, after all. "C'mon, let's go."

They rounded a corner, and found five Shamblers ahead. Maria's gun swung forward, and she put three of them down in five shots, quick as a wink. Ella was slightly more sluggish, but the remaining two went down in one shot apiece.

"Nice work," said Maria, striding on ahead.

Ella seemed surprised as she jogged after her. "Really?"

Maria shrugged. "You got real talent, woman," she said. "I'm not about to complain."

"I just ..." Ella glanced at the sky. "... there's a Floater coming."

"Shit." Maria looked around, and saw half a dozen more Shamblers coming. "I'll take the Floater, you handle the Shamblers."

"Yeah." Ella got to work.

Maria was busy picking out the correct glyphs to shoot while dodging the Shamblers' return fire, but through the corner of the eye, she watched Ella's deft dodging, and saw her take out all of the Shamblers with ease.

There was no other way Maria could describe it: Ella's aim and dodging, simply put, were perfect.

Hmm.

It was another block before they reached their destination: a train of hay trucks, filling up with refugees. Simple setup; they filled up one, left, then filled up another, and the gap between trucks would ensure that at least some of them survived. As they ran, Maria reloaded her pistol, and then Ella fumblingly did as well. Only as they neared the trucks did Maria say, "So where'd you learn to shoot?"

Ella glanced back the way they'd come. "... dad."

"Ah." Maria mentally kicked herself. She'd been so caught up in her excitement at the poor girl's skill, she'd forgotten how she'd found her. "Sorry." She took a deep breath, and handed Ella a couple pouches of ammo. "Well, here's some more for the road."

Ella smiled faintly as she took the pouches. "You know, you're way less gruff than ... I expected," she said. "I mean, from the stories ... the ... uh ..."

She looked straight up as a hum rose. Maria did, too. There was a Floater directly above them, charging up to fire. The size of the explosion was probably going to take out some of the trucks.

Both of them raised their guns to the sky. Well, this was it, Maria supposed. There was no way she'd hit all the right glyphs in time to stop it. On the other hand, you could shoot the emitter a split second before it fired. One in a million chance, though; your timing needed to be absolutely perfect, and you needed to hit the emitter dead center. It'd take a miracle —

Gently, Ella squeezed the trigger of her gun.

The Floater's emitter detonated in a blue fireball, followed by the Floater itself.

Maria allowed herself one second of staring at the fireball, and another two seconds staring at Ella.

Then she clapped Ella's shoulder. "You protect 'em, yeah?"

"Yeah," said Ella. She smiled wanly. "This ... will ... it might go differently from ... from Oakland."

"Ahhh." If Ella and her father were from Oakland, which had been wiped out a few years ago ... that explained everything, in Maria's mind. Well, okay, not the out-and-out perfection, but at least Maria knew how the girl was keeping herself together as well as she was. This was not Ella Walden's first rodeo.

Maria helped Ella climb up onto the frontmost hay truck, which was cramped with refugees. "Truck number three, full!" said the driver. "Heading off to Stockton!" The engine started.

Ella smiled. "So, uh ..." She shrugged. "I guess I'll see you later!"

Maria smiled back. "Later, Ella Walden," she said. "I'm gonna see if there's anyone else who was in your position."

Ella nodded, and waved as the truck began moving, and Maria headed back into Modesto.

When found out a week later that truck number three had never made it to Stockton, it soured Maria's mood more than she expected. She'd wanted to get to know this shy, nervous woman named Ella whose skill with a gun was perfect.

But what could you do? There were all sorts of hazards on the road, even besides the Invaders themselves. As far as Maria knew at the time, that was the end of it.

It was another week before she started hearing very bizarre rumors. Running around the remains of California, there was supposedly a demon. A demon called Desirella the Dreamy, who hated bandits and Invaders in equal measure, and tore them apart wherever she found them.

Maria had no idea what to make of it all. She was too busy with the more immediate problems of the ruined world to look into the matter, though.

It was the evening, four weeks after Modesto.

Maria sat in a tavern in her hometown of Greenfield, nursing a beer and poring over a map of the surrounding region. Cartography had been in something of a shamble since the world ended, but there was just enough information in the old maps that Maria Los Angeles could pick a direction and roam. It wasn't comprehensive, and she couldn't save everyone; this wasn't a flying-magical-princess story. But it made a difference to the people she was saving — which was pretty good, as miracles went.

The men chattering behind her were something of a distraction, however.

"I heard a new rumor about that ... demon who's been running around," said Gregory Fuller, a heavyset man with graying hair and a jawline that looked like it could cut glass.

The bartender, Pyotr Leonov, a scraggly guy with sandy hair, let out a sharp intake of breath. "Oh, you mean ..." He hesitated. "The Dream? The one who singlehandedly wiped out the bandits that were messing with Santa Rosa?"

"I dunno if you can call that 'single-handed'," Gregory said guardedly, eliciting a chorus of nervous chuckles.

Maria rolled her eyes, and did her best to concentrate on the map. Let's see, last week she'd done another check on Merced. Things were quiet there, none of the signs that the Invaders or any bandits might have been thinking of dropping by. Santa Rosa was also quiet lately from what she'd heard ...

Dylan Fisher, a survivor of Modesto who'd been on truck number two, spoke up. "You mean, Desirel—"

There was a chorus of shushes. "She can hear when you say her name!" barked Pyotr.

Gregory shook his head. "Well," he said, "that guy from Sacramento said she sat down on the roof of that Invader outpost, kicked her feet a li'l bit, and the roof just collapsed!" The door to the tavern opened and someone stepped inside. "All the Invaders up and died, and then the Dream dematerialized again!"

Hmm. Maria made a mental note to check out Sacramento — she hadn't visited in a while because she wasn't sure how to deal with the outpost — but for now, she turned to face whoever had just walked in.

"She did not, it was a whole fight that just ended with something like that!" said Ella Walden. "But I heard that she sometimes pretends to be a human and has meals or drinks with people, and they always end up luckier for a few days." She wore a pure white dress and a matching wide-brimmed hat, with a black capelet over her shoulders. She was the very picture of poise and confidence, and she had an enigmatic Mona Lisa smile as she walked up to the bar.

"Jesus Christ," said Maria. "It's really you?" She was openly staring, but she didn't feel the need to hide her astonishment at seeing someone she'd thought was dead. Not in her own hometown, at least.

Ella turned a positively dazzling smile on Maria, and her gray eyes somehow seemed even more piercing now. "Nah, I'm just a hallucination, brought on by drinking too much, uh ..." She turned to the bar, and gestured to Maria. "... I'll have what she's having."

There was laughter as Ella paid and brought her beer over to where Maria was sitting. The men resumed their chatter about demons and other nonsense.

Maria smiled thinly. "Well, son of a bitch, Walden," she said. "This is one hell of a surprise."

Ella smiled back. "That I'm here, or that I'm talking?" she said. It sounded like she was quoting something.

Maria chortled. "Whichever!" she said. "How'd you get the duds?" Had Ella gotten new glasses? Maria was still having trouble taking in all the details.

"With care and pride," said Ella. She deposited the gun Maria had given her on the table. "I thought I should give this back, by the way," she added, pushing it towards her. "Don't have a need for it anymore."

Maria shook her head, and pushed the gun back. "Oh, you can keep it," she said. It sounded like Ella had been having adventures since leaving Modesto. "So what happened to truck number three, anyway?"

Ella slumped, and her cheerful demeanor vanished. "Bandits," she said, fiddling with the gun before putting it down again. "This gang called the Jock Dogs. Dunno if anyone else survived. I guess I just panicked, since I didn't have anyone backing me up, and I just ran, and ... didn't look back."

Maria sighed. "Ella Walden, you are the luckiest woman on this bitch of an earth."

"I know, right?" Ella said glumly. "And since then ... I've been doing what I could to fight the Invaders."

Maria nodded slowly. "Kinda like me," she said. "Wish you didn't have to have all that happen for the start of it."

"You're telling me." Ella hesitated. "I'd prefer if you didn't tell anyone else about this, or where I came from, if that's okay with you."

"Oh, sure," said Maria, nodding quickly. The poor woman deserved some kind of break, and while Maria couldn't be a flying magical princess hero, she could refrain from talking about one woman's obviously-traumatic history.

Ella's smile started to return. "You really are nicer in real life." She paused. "I mean, as opposed to some ... legend ... who only acts in a single way, and only ever compliments people grudgingly."

Maria shrugged. "Well, you know how it is," she said. "I'm a human bein'. I gotta be gruff when I'm on the job, since y'can't afford distractions in this world, but ..." She shrugged again. "I do care about people."

"Of course you do, Maria," said Ella, with the return of that Mona Lisa smile. "If you didn't, you wouldn't wander around helping everyone so much."

Maria looked into Ella's eyes. She wasn't psychic or anything, but she had a knack for getting a feel for people. And Ella's gray eyes were like looking into a mirror.

Honestly, it was lonely at the top. The idea that there was someone like her ... someone who could keep up with her, someone who was motivated by the same things ... well, Maria didn't mind at all. She could see herself partnering up with Ella Walden, if not necessarily romantically. It would hit all the harder when one of them died, of course, but she knew the old saying about how it was better to have loved and lost than not loved at all. And that was the best kind of miracle you could hope for in this world.

"I spent a week in Oakland," said Ella. "Figuring out ... shenanigans. Since then, I've just been developing myself further. Creatively, I guess you could say."

Maria narrowed her eyes. "Oakland's real dangerous, woman," she said. "It's full-on Invader territory these days."

Ella shrugged. "I mean, yeah."

Maria shook her head. "Was any of that supposed to make sense?"

Ella just smiled. "Not really," she said. "Some of it will eventually, but ...."

Thunder rolled in the distance. Very familiar thunder.

"Didn't think there was gonna be a storm," Pyotr said uneasily.

Ella downed the rest of her drink. "Oh, there isn't," she called back to him. "At least, not as far as the weather is concerned."

Everyone gasped. "... fucking hell," muttered Maria. She'd always known it was only a matter of time before the Invaders came to Greenfield, always known that the population of 1200 was big enough to catch their attention. But to have it actually happen was like a stab in her gut. She rolled up her map and didn't bother to pick up her beer. "Get ready for the evacuation. Fuller, get the trucks ready."

There was already a blue-gray haze spreading over the horizon, and the monoliths were glowing. Shapes covered in sigils were floating closer as the men ran shouting through the streets. Maria could already hear doors slamming open.

"Well, here we go," said Ella. "Now it's time for me to show you what I'm capable of now."

"You said 'now' twice," said Maria, drawing her gun.

"Shit." Ella hesitated. "Gotta ask, Maria Los Angeles," she said. "Have you ever seen an Invader attack that was completely fought off, without much in the way of casualties?"

Maria sighed softly and stared at her feet, but there was no point in lying or sugarcoating it, or implying that miracles really could happen. There were no magical flying princesses. "No," she said, turning back. "Never in my ...."

Ella's eyes were glowing silver. Hazy white wings began emanating from her shoulders.

"... life," Maria said flatly.

Desirella the Dreamy smiled her dazzling smile again. "Well," she said, "I'm pretty sure it'll look something like this." She launched herself into the sky, leaving a trail of silver stardust.

"Son of a bitch," muttered Maria, as silver light lanced out and the first of the Floaters exploded. All she needs is a goddamn princess costume ... She ran forward, along with several other townspeople who were good with guns.

Shamblers were coming. A group of six of them were charging towards the edge of the town, carrying a large crystal that could be used to change people into more Shamblers. Maria raised her gun ...

A cloud of white pixels coalesced to form Desirella, who slammed down feet first onto the crystal, shattering it. "Not tonight," she said. She tapped two of the Shamblers on the shoulder, four clouds of pixels formed and an arm reached out of each of them to tap the others, and then she rocketed sideways towards another group, and the six Shamblers all exploded at once.

"The hell are we needed for?" said Gregory Fuller, awe in his voice.

Maria shot at a smaller group of Shamblers which Desirella had missed. She threw herself to the side to avoid their return-fire. "She's only got so many hands!" she said. "We spread out, cover everything that gets past her!"

A nearby Floater exploded. "No literal limit to number of hands!" said Desirella, swooping by. "But yes, thank you!"

"Real joker, Ella," muttered Maria, ducking under some more shots.

"Yeah I know," said Ella's voice in her ear.

There was an elephantine roar from the distance. Maria looked up, and felt her blood chill. Two giant ape-like crystalline figures: they were called Brutes, and they deserved the capital letter even more than the other types.

Desirella managed to take one of them out in the space of five seconds of punches, bolts of silver light at point blank range, and slashes with what appeared to be a glowing sword. The other shattered after she flicked its forehead.

The battle kept going like this.

At the end of it all, Desirella descended from the sky, and stretched her arms. And her wings. And a few extra pairs of arms as well. "Well, that looks like it was all of 'em!"

"God damn," said Gregory Fuller. "It really is you!"

Desirella shot him a cheeky grin. "I suppose that depends on what you mean by 'really', but yes."

Maria snorted. "Thanks a fucking million, Desirella."

"No charge! I wasn't even sure I'd be able to pull it off!" Desirella said cheerfully. "Although, I don't suppose I could stay the night?"

Pyotr laughed weakly. "I don't think anyone will object to you staying anywhere in this town, after what you just did!"

"That was a joke," said Desirella, who was clearly losing her balance. "I'm not actually going to occupy any space until morning, probably. Ciao!" And with that, she keeled over, and disintegrated into pixels.

"Oh, you absolute fucking clown," Maria said flatly.

Gregory looked at her sideways. "The hell were you talking to her about, anyway?" he said. "At Pyotr's place."

Maria realized that 1. she hadn't actually said "Ella Walden" where anyone could hear her, and 2. this probably fell under not divulging Desirella's secrets. "We were just sorta catching up, I guess," she said curtly. "She popped up in Modesto. She asked me not to say anything, but ..." She gestured expansively towards the remains of the Invaders.

Gregory considered this. "Too bad she hadn't found this confidence back then," he said. "On the other hand, I'm not complaining that she didn't wait a minute longer."

There was a general murmur of agreement. "It's a fucking miracle!" said Dylan Fisher.

"She wasn't kidding about making everyone luckier," said Pyotr Leonov.

"Yeah ..." Maria recalled that it had taken about forty-five minutes to evacuate Modesto. The Invaders' casualties: a bunch of Shamblers and a handful of Floaters. The defenders' casualties: all killed except for around ninety of the town's 1000-odd population, many of the survivors were injured, and that was if you counted the evacuation trucks which escaped the invasion itself but never made it to their destinations.

And just now, the Battle of Greenfield had been two hours long. Invaders' casualties: all of them wiped out utterly. Defenders' casualties: two lightly wounded, and slight damage to some of the houses from the Invaders' ranged weapons.

Right as Maria was getting ready to go to bed, she heard a quiet knock on her front door. She threw on her nightgown, came downstairs, and saw the text "CAN I COME IN? Y/N" in ghostly letters slide under the crack of her door.

"... Sure," she said in a low voice.

Ella materialized just inside the door, looking awkward and nervous. Her eyes were still glowing faint silver in the darkness. She couldn't quite look Maria in the eye as she said, "So, uh, hi."

"Oh c'mon in," said Maria. "Stop lookin' at me like you're embarrassed about savin' my town."

"That's not how anxiety works, but sure," said Ella.

Maria led her over to the kitchen area and paused at the table. There was only one chair. "Wanna sit down?"

Ella walked over to the opposite side of the table, and a chair abruptly popped into existence beneath her. "Yes."

Maria raised her eyebrows. Well, okay then. She sat down in the original chair. "So ..." She really wasn't sure how to talk to a ridiculously overpowered demoness who she'd first met sitting terrified in a half-destroyed house. "You ain't really from Oakland, are you."

"Nope," said Ella. She stared at the ceiling for a moment. "... Picture a world like this one was in June of 2020 when the plague was happening, a year before the Invaders came."

"... Damn," said Maria. "I was just eighteen."

Ella shrugged. "Now imagine a video game which, within its fictional narrative, depicts current events."

Maria blinked. That ... was not where she'd expected this to go. In fact, that wasn't really where she thought Ella was going to say she was from, either. "We're in a goddamn video game?"

Ella blinked, and shook her head. "No, we're in the real world," she said. "Or, I mean, a real world. But there's too many differences." She shrugged. "Like ... in the game, 'Cyan Ruin', the towns are toy-sized. I could walk from Greenfield to Sacramento in seven and a half minutes, which is like double the length of the day-night cycle, and I could go from one end of Greenfield to the other in less than two minutes. Whatever force brought me here, it seems to have sought out an actual world with a town named Greenfield, and the Invaders, and a hero named Maria Los Angeles."

Maria could only shrug. "Who brought you here?" she said. "How? Why?"

Ella looked away. "If I knew that, I'd've opened with it."

"And so ..." Maria shook her head. "I'm guessin' you were inserted into the role of the player?"

Ella looked uncomfortable. "... I woke up in Modesto, a few days before the attack, which is how the game starts," she said. "Jed Walden decided to 'adopt' me, but ..." She grimaced. "No one really believed me when I tried to tell them where I came from, or that I knew we were going to be attacked."

"Ohhhhh." Maria sat back. "So ... what's 'Ella Walden' like in, in Cyan Ruin?"

Ella shook her head. "You make your own character," she said. "'Jed Walden's stepkid' is set in stone, and when you visit Oakland there's flashbacks, but you pick your name, your gender, your appearance ... dialog choices and all that ..." She shook her head. "Back in my homeworld, my name was Ella Sinclair, but when Jed Walden died in front of me ..."

"Oh, got it," said Maria. She regarded Ella for another moment, then decided to just cut to the chase. "How'd you become 'Desirella'?"

Ella grinned unsteadily. "Console commands," she said. "I can still ... sort of ... interact with this world as if it was a video game. There's some notorious glitches in the ruins of Oakland that let you turn on Creative Mode — the flashbacks are kind of buggy — and I managed to create custom attacks and particle emitters and stuff. And I can detect when the Invaders are about to do something cute like try to wipe out a town."

"So why be a 'demon'?" said Maria. "Why not just be ... I 'unno ... an overpowered superhero?"

"I've ..." Desirella shrugged pensively and sat back. "I've always known what I'd do if I had this kind of power. One of the things I'd do is that I'd become a cryptic teleporting eldritch lesbian weirdo, who can just 'decide' she doesn't want to exist for a few hours because her body is just a metaphorical construct you can flip off like a switch. It's ... part of it is a transgender thing, it's why so many of us are furries."

Maria opened her mouth to ask how she was holding up without hormones in the ruined world, then closed her mouth as she remembered the entire rest of the conversation up to now.

Ella shot Maria that dazzling smile again. "Of course," she continued, "I would never actually cause enough trouble to get thwarted by a hero, unless she was cute."

Maria sensed that she was either being baited or flirted with. Rather than trying to figure out which one it was, she decided to skip it over completely. "You can't save the game or whatever, can you?" Well, okay, Desirella's glowing gray eyes were kind of pretty, but ...

If Ella was disappointed, she didn't show it. "If I could do that, I would've gone back and saved Modesto."

"... why are you telling me this?" said Maria. Although, given the 'cryptic weirdo' bit ... "Because no one will believe me?"

"No." Ella smiled wanly. "Because I'm pretty sure you're the only person who would believe me."

Ahhhh.

It was the exact same information, more-or-less. But the difference in phrasing made all the difference in the world. Whoever she'd been before, Ella was finding it just as lonely at the top as Maria had been.

And unlike Maria, Ella was so high up, she needed someone to bring her back down to earth.

Maria smiled back. "So what happens next in the plot?"

"Well," said Desirella, "first, we mournfully escape the ruins of Greenfield ..."

Maria just snickered.

"... and everything else is probably kind of FUBAR because I've been running around being a demon instead of advancing the plot, and this world is inhabited by real people instead of video game cartoon characters following a script," Desirella finished. "I can't even intuit the way you'll act, because, again: not a video game cartoon character."

Maria frowned. "... so how do we beat the Invaders?" she says. "I doubt a video game would just ... not let you win."

Desirella shrugged and adjusted her glasses. "I never actually got the chance beat the game, so I'm still figuring that out," she said. "For example, imagine what happens if there were five of me. The —"

"Fuck, that's scary, Ella," Maria blurted out, grinning. "That is an honest-to-god scary idea, to have five eldritch weirdos runnin' around."

Ella deflated again. "Yeahhhhhh," she said. "That's the thing, isn't it? Humanity gets saved from the monsters by other monsters, who just popped out of nowhere? I'm pretty sure that's a total 'no thanks' on your part." She shrugged. "In the end, if I'm honest with myself, the eldritch weirdo is never the protagonist."

Maria shook her head. "Don't get me wrong," she said. "Just speakin' for myself, it sounds great. You saw how the boys were reacting! And I'm pretty sure we're already mighty scared by the Invaders." She paused. "'Sides, having you straight-up collapse after winning kind of helps humanize you a little."

"Hmm." Ella considered this. "I suppose you're right about that. But I feel like going the rest of the way would take a bit of finesse. Say ... having an unambiguous human fight alongside me." She raised her eyebrows at Maria. "If you'd be willing, that is."

Maria shook her head. "I'm not a miracle-worker like you, Ella."

Ella smiled. "Well, I haven't told you the other thing I'd wanted to do," she said. She held out her hand, and a necklace with a faintly-glowing heart-shaped gem appeared out of thin air. "How'd you like to be one of my miracles?"

Maria snorted, and broke into giggles. "Oh my god Ella that was cheesy," she said. "Like, I'm not actually sure if it was a pickup line, but that was just so fucking cheesy."

Ella's smile didn't even waver. "Cheese is delicious," she said, as she gestured with the necklace.

The next morning, Desirella made a show of materializing in front of the bar. She didn't accept any money or material rewards. "I hate the Invaders as much as you do, and the fact that they didn't get what they wanted is reward enough," she said. "Besides, I have little use for money." And then she rose up into the sky and dematerialized into pixels.

Maria made an excuse about heading to Sacramento to check out what Desirella had done there, packed the usual amount of supplies, and headed off to the north.

She walked until the town was out of sight, crested another couple of hills, and then nodded as Desirella materialized.

"So how does the 'extra luck' thing work?" said Maria.

"Status effects that boost perception and dexterity and agility," said Ella. "There's no 'luck' stat. I haven't been able to get them to last for more than a couple of days, though."

"Damn," said Maria. "Still, though ..."

"... it makes a difference while it's happening," Ella finished for her. "You ready?"

Maria nodded, and pulled the necklace out from her shirt. She looked it over for a moment, then took a deep breath. "Miracle, Shine Forth!" she commanded.

A brilliant pink light surged from the necklace. It wrapped around Maria and completely obscured her vision. When it cleared ...

... she was dressed in a sparkly pink and red princess costume with white gloves, white stylized boots, heart-shaped gems, a tiara and opera mask ... Her hair had turned bright red, too.

With only the slightest twitch of her thoughts, she rose up into the air. "Motherfucker," she said. "Goddamn, Ella, how did you know!?"

Ella looked genuinely confused. "Know what?"

"Never mind," said Maria. "So, uh ... I'm ... 'Miracle Heart' now, am I?"

"Yep," said Desirella. "I guess I could be, uh, Miracle Dream?" She shrugged, and in a burst of sparkles, she was wearing a silver and white version of Maria's princess-costume. "Anyway. Wanna try stuff out?"

Maria thought about this.

And then she rose up off the ground and zoomed through the air towards Sacramento.

She laughed out loud.

Some Shamblers were standing around listlessly in a glade. Miracle Heart swooped down and held out her hand in a gun-shape. "Heart Bullet!" she said, and a glowing pink burst of light shot forth and shattered the first Shambler. One of them fired a potshot back at her which went wild, and she laughed, throwing out more and more bursts which reduced the Shamblers to rubble.

She zipped through the sky with Desirella at her side. It was the most exhilarating feeling ever. She didn't even slow down when she began to see Sacramento on the horizon. She activated a telepathy command and said, {Holy shit, Ella, why don't you fly like this all the time?}

{I do!} Ella replied. {I just have some very interesting ways of going unnoticed!} She swooped around to Maria's other side. {Also some boring ones.}

Maria did a loop-the-loop. {Still can't believe you threw this together with just creative-mode nonsense.}

Ella grinned, reclining on her back in midair. {It's just sparkly on-disk-DLC costumes, stat-boosts, special effects on an invisible gun, a script for the telepathy, and a Floater's flying-physics with a higher maximum speed,} she said. She turned upside down and looked at Sacramento. {Also, we should come in for a landing very soon.}

Maria thought about this. {Just five more minutes, mom.}

Desirella groaned, then snorted. {That's not funny!}

Maria grinned. {So you said there were other women you thought would make good Miracle Princesses?}

{Who might make good Miracle Princesses,} said Ella. {Depends on various factors, most importantly willingness. There's a lady who unironically goes by Jane Austen in Sacramento, she gives the player a few quests and I think I know what her Miracle color's gonna be. Then there's Liz Baker, who the player rescues from being a member of the Jock Dogs — that gang of bandits I mentioned.} She grinned at Maria. {She gets into an argument about whether or not miracles exist with another companion by the name of Maria Los Angeles.}

Maria snickered. {If 'Maria' was against them existin', I don't think that argument is gonna happen now.}

{I'm not remotely surprised!} said Ella. {But yeah, a couple more after that, and then we'll take the fight to the Invaders!} She cancelled her flight, dropped to the ground like a stone, and landed as if her physics-movement had abruptly switched off.

Maria landed next to her, in a much more careful manner. "And after that," she said, "we figure out who brought you here."

Ella sighed. "Yeah ..." She shrugged. "I mean, I'm not exactly looking forward to facing off against the people who, uh, are so powerful they were able to give me these powers. I doubt it'd be impossible for them to just switch all of us off, if they wanted."

Maria shrugged, and dispelled her magical girl transformation. "We'll cross that bridge when we come to it," she said, clapping Ella on the shoulder. "First things first, Desirella."

Ella took a deep breath, and managed a lopsided smile. "Right!" she said softly. "And the first thing is Jane Austen!"

Maria returned the smile, and the two of them started heading into Sacramento. The future was still full of uncertainties; she actually had even less of an idea idea as to what was going to happen next than she had last night.

But it looked like the world's luck was starting to turn up.

Neither of them detected the invisible woman in the green business suit watching them from behind. Smirking.

"Well, it looks like creating Cyan Ruin and sending it back in time is bearing fruit," she muttered under her breath. "Not that this is how I'd anticipated that you'd approach this, 'Desirella the Dreamy'. I thought the reason you made a beeline for Oakland to exploit creative-mode was in order to build yourself an arsenal."

She took off her glasses. "And I certainly didn't count on you empowering others," she continued, cleaning them on her suit. "We're going to have to change our plans around all this. And we'll have to be quite careful about how we send you after the true source behind the Invaders. Though in the end, if I'm honest with myself ..."

She put her glasses back on her face. She was a brunette, and she had piercing gray eyes. "... I'm not remotely surprised," she finished, smiling the same Mona Lisa smile that her past self had taken up.

To be continued ...

#the verge of cyan ruin #post apocalypse #game bugs #my stuff #my writing #violence #death #swearing #wlw #trans stuff #magical girl #magical woman #cryptid lesbians #isekai #this divine alchemy of the self

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solavillain · 5 years

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Pas de Deux Ch 4: Jamais Vu

+pairing: Spinel x fem!Reader +genre: Drama, romance, angst, slow burn, enemies to friends to lovers +warnings: None (for now) +word count: 6.4K +Chapter 4 / ? previous || next

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Your group heads out to the warehouse on the edge of town, and quickly starts setting everything up for the show. Some evacuees are already hanging around outside, waiting for Sadie and the band to do the soundcheck. You don’t know too much about setting up all this equipment, so you help move things around and keep an eye on Garnet. You’re internally kicking yourself for letting her wander off last time, she could have gone anywhere! Luckily Greg and Pearl found her, but still...

Spinel interrupts your thoughts, walking past with Steven, who looks rather aggravated. You watch their conversation bemusedly from your place in front of the stage, catching Steven’s eye and chuckling at Spinel’s antics.

“What’s that?” Spinel asks, pointing to some guitar amps up on stage.

“Guitar stuff,” Steven says flatly.

“And those?” she asks again.

“Uh, microphones...Spinel, hey, why don’t you help Y/n with taking tickets at the door?” He says quickly, shooting you a pleading look.

You chuckle and nod. “Yeah, I can do that. Wanna help, Spins?” you ask, the nickname flying out before you can stop it.

You watch her eyes go wide before she looks at the ground, avoiding your gaze. “Uh...yeah, I can help,” she mutters, leaving Steven to walk past you towards the entrance. As she walks past, you catch a glimpse of her face, which is a deeper pink than usual.

“Is she...blushing?” you think curiously. You follow her out to the front, eyes on the back of her heart buns. “Maybe the nickname is weird for a Gem I barely know...”

The sun is descending on Beach City, and it paints a lovely picture on the distant beach. The air is cool, and the atmosphere is just right- you can almost forget the world might be ending soon.

“Hi Mayor Nanafua!” you call out, stepping towards the smaller woman. “We’re here to help!”

“Ah, Y/n! I forgot you visit over the summer, how nice to have you here! Although, given current circumstances...” she trails off, gazing towards the injector. “Anyway! You and the pink one can direct people inside! Take tickets from the fans, send the evacuees in- fairly simple, no?”

“Yep, we can handle that!” You reply cheerfully, motioning for Spinel to stand on the opposite side of the door from you.

“Ok Spinel, basically people are going to hand you little pieces of paper with today’s date on ‘em. Technically anyone can go in now because of the evacuation, but...we just have to hold the tickets for Greg so he can get a head count of how many people were here for the band.”

A fan walks up to you then, and hands you his ticket. You nod as he walks in and look back to Spinel, holding up the small ticket for her to see. “This is what the tickets look like, just so you know. It’ll be fun! This shouldn’t take long, and then we can watch the show!”

“Yay! I’m so excited!” Spinel cheers, grinning out at the approaching crowd.

x * x * x * x * x

Once there’s a sizable crowd inside, Mayor Nanafua catches your attention and tells you to head in as well. You grin and grab Spinel’s hand excitedly.

“C’mon, it’s gonna start!”

You rush inside with the pink Gem in tow, moving up front to find Greg, Pearl, and Garnet. To your surprise, Amethyst has made her way on the stage- you forgot she drummed for Sadie Killer sometimes, so this was going to be even better than you thought! Spinel made her way over to Garnet, which gave you an opportunity to check in with Steven and Greg.

“Hey guys, how’s it going?” you asked kindly.

“Well...okay, I guess,” Greg replied, scratching the back of his neck while nervously glancing at Pearl. “We requested a song for them to play that might jog Pearl’s memory...”

The song begins, and it’s one you recognize off the new mini-album, called “Disobedient”. You grin and start dancing in place, watching Amethyst rock out on the drums. She really was great! You glance over at Garnet and Spinel, who have taken to jumping up and down together.

“At least she’s getting along with one other person,” you think happily.

“This has gotta bring Pearl’s memories back,” Steven says to you and Greg confidently. You look past them at Pearl, who gazes at Greg, waiting for any opportunity to serve him. You can only hope this will spark something in her...

But as the song goes on, she shows no signs of recognition. Your closest Gem friend is right in front of you and she has no idea who you are, not even with this song about rebellion. You can’t think of what else would work, and you’re building up the strength to accept that, like Garnet, Pearl might not be back for a while.

You can see Amethyst growing more and more worried from behind the drum set. Pearl seems just as devoted to Greg as usual, even going so far as to bow to him at the end of a short ballet dance. Amethyst motions to you and Steven to come closer to the stage, and you follow Steven as he dances his way up.

“It’s not enough!” He says in an exasperated tone, raising his voice above the music.

“She still isn’t remembering anything,” you chime in, glancing back at her sadly.

“Maybe we need to hit her where it hurts,” Amethyst says, resigned.

“What?” Steven replies.

“You know, her original boss, the love of her life- the reason she rebelled in the first place!”

“Mom...she’s gotta remember Mom! But-” he cuts himself off, turning back to Greg who had been listening in.

“If that’s what it takes,” Greg says with a shrug, preparing himself to see Rose.

You glance worriedly between Amethyst and the others. You never knew Rose, so seeing her won’t mean a whole lot to you- other than reminding you of all the ways she hurt your friends- but you know it could be devastating for any of them, and especially Pearl.

“This could work...”

Steven nods to Amethyst, and she grabs a mic while shifting. Suddenly, Rose Quartz is standing before you, albeit a purple version of her. Like everyone else in the room, you can’t tear your eyes away from her, but in your peripheral you see Pearl hasn’t looked away from Greg at all. Amethyst/Rose looks directly at Pearl and finishes off the song.

“I want to be disobedient...I want to be disobedient...disobedient....”

But as the song ends and cheers erupt from the crowd, Pearl still isn’t any closer to shifting back to her present self. You slump your shoulders sadly, tears forming in your eyes.

You turn back to the stage just as Amethyst shifts back to her normal form, and you’re suddenly grateful that at least one of the Gems is around. You don’t know how you would be getting through all of this without them. Steven is great, but he still has his moments where he reminds you that he’s just a kid. You know you’re still young too, but you’re a little closer in maturity to the Gems, so having them around for crisis is always comforting.

“How could that not work? What are we missing?”

Steven’s voice makes you tear your attention from Amethyst, and you get back into brainstorming mode. You can’t afford to fall apart now.

You don’t have any answers for Steven’s question; all you can do is turn back to Greg and Pearl and wrack your brain for something else to try. Greg claps slowly for the end of the song, and Pearl rushes to stop him.

“Don’t worry, I can clap for you!” She yells, and claps exuberantly, much to Greg’s dismay.

“Ugh! What will make you stop serving me?!”

“As long as you exist, I will serve you!”

To your right, Steven and Amethyst gasp in unison.

“What, what am I missing?” You ask them quietly.

“’As long as you exist!’” They say at the same time, quoting back Pearl’s words.

“That’s the final piece- Mom disappeared!” Steven exclaims. He rushes over to Greg, a determined look in his eyes.

“Dad- I’ve got an idea.”

He whispers something to his father, something that causes Greg to look at Steven in disbelief.

“Are you sure? Aren’t your powers messed up?”

“I can at least try!”

“But...what about me? I’ve never...”

“C’mon, Dad- let's duet!”

With that, Greg nods once, and follows his son to the stage, both grabbing a guitar on the way. You look wide eyed towards Amethyst, who has a half-crazed grin on her features.

“How is another song supposed to help Pearl remember? We just tried this!” you whisper loudly to your friend.

She laughs and grabs you by the shoulder, pulling you in and pointing to the stage. “Just watch, dude!”

You roll your eyes and smile, knowing that it’s better to trust Amethyst and go along with it rather than argue the point. Besides, Steven thinks this could work too, whatever it is.

On stage, Greg and Steven ready their instruments, briefly tuning them before they look at each other and start playing. It’s an intense sounding rock intro, and as they step closer to one another on the beat, pyrotechnics flare up in front of them. It’s so bright that you almost miss it- they're back to back, Steven looks like he’s straining, and then there’s a flash of light and smoke surrounds the stage. You squint, trying to see where they are since the music has stopped-

“Um-Greg?” Pearl calls out nervously.

Spinel pops up next to you and cries, “Steven?!”

Before you or Amethyst can answer either of them, a voice that is distinctly not Steven or Greg sounds out from the stage.

“It’s a big old universe out there...and when you’re getting crushed under the weight of them stars, sometimes you need that special someone to remind you that you’re so much more.”

The smoke parts, and a man is standing before you- “No, definitely not a man, really...a fusion,” you think to yourself, noting the four arms he possesses. Did Steven really just...fuse with his father? If you hadn’t heard about and seen Stevonnie before, you almost wouldn’t believe it. A half gem, half human fusing with a full human...It just seems so unlikely. But you know by now that with Steven, basically anything can happen.

Behind you, Pearl is looking around for Greg frantically, and you’re almost ready to give up again- Greg disappeared and she’s still not back?- but once Steven/Greg start singing, Pearl suddenly looks almost...relaxed. More at ease than she’s looked this entire time since she was reset. And you have hope again.

“Nothing is holding you back now,” Steven/Greg sings, “No one can push you around. What do you want to do? You’re the master of you! And isn’t the thought enough to lift you off of the ground?”

Suddenly a pink aura is surrounding Steg and Pearl, and they’re literally lifted off the ground by music. You gasp in wonder, and look excitedly to Amethyst, who is looking hopeful as well. You both clutch the front of the stage, staring up at the floating pair as they drift higher into the sky, the music getting further and further away.

After a moment, you see a bright light emitting from Pearl, and your heart leaps.

“She’s coming back, she’s coming back!” You screech to Amethyst, jumping up and down excitedly.

She grins nonchalantly and hoists herself up on stage as a glow surrounds her too, and brings her up into the sky with the others. You watch in fascination as Pearl’s far away form shifts through what looks like different iterations of herself. Finally- the Pearl you know emerges, jacket and all. You clap happily, watching with glee as Pearl and Amethyst do a short dance, and then they’re fused as well- into the Gem you know as Opal. You’d never actually seen Opal form, as there hasn’t been much occasion for the Crystal Gems to fuse (except for Garnet, of course). So this is a real treat for you, and wow do they look amazing!

“Hell yeah! Get it, Opal!” you call up to your friends, pumping a fist in the air.

Behind you, Lion appears, and swoops Garnet up into the air, Steg’s pink glow supposedly lifting them off as well. You watch them pass by, and you wish you could be up there with them...but you’re content to watch from below, supporting your friends.

You don’t see Spinel’s face twist into an expression of sadness and longing.

You hear the faint ending of the song as the group descends back down, and Steven and Greg quickly unfuse as they reach the stage. You hop up onto the stage as they fall to the floor, and Steven looks much worse than he did before the fusion.

“Steven...hey, are you okay?” You call out as you reach the group. Your back is facing the crowd and you’re focused on helping him up, but Steven’s gaze goes past you.

“Wait...Spinel!” He cries out weakly. You turn towards the pink Gem just in time to see her rush to the entrance. You glance between Steven and the retreating form of Spinel, trying to decide what to do. Ultimately, though, you decide Steven is more important in the moment- he looks really worn out and you’re concerned for him.

And you’re not the only one. Amethyst and Pearl unfuse, looking content, until Pearl notices Steven’s condition.

“Steven, are you okay?!” she gasps, echoing your sentiment from earlier.

“D-don’t worry about me,” He says, finally accepting your help in standing up. He seems a bit more stable, though still fairly shaky on his feet, “We need Spinel to remember how to stop her injector. Pearl, what do you know about her?”

“Spinel? She was Pink Diamond’s little playmate...They used to spend ages together in Pink’s garden,” Pearl replies. You can’t help but catch her eye and give her a big smile, which she returns. It’s so good to see her back to normal and acting like herself again. You can’t wait to catch up when all of this is over.

“Garden?” Steven asks incredulously.

“That’s where they used to play-”

“So what’s her problem with us?” Amethyst interrupts, furrowing her brow at Pearl.

“I don’t know, I haven’t seen her in six thousand years!” Pearl answers, earning a surprised look from you. It’s so easy to forget how truly ancient the Gem race is, when they’re just such a part of your daily life.

“Something must have happened to her since then!” Pearl finishes, glancing between the group.

“Then that’s what I need to find out,” Steven says, seemingly ready to take off after Spinel.

“Hey, Steven, um...maybe we should let you rest for a bit first? She can’t have gone far,” you say hesitantly, holding a hand on his shoulder to steady him.

“It looks like that fusion took everything out of you!” Amethyst agrees.

“I’ve gotta do what I can with the little I have left,” Steven replies, sweat dripping from his face.

You stand in front of him as he starts to take off. “At least let me come with you, ok? Greg, Pearl and Amethyst can watch Garnet, and I’ve been with Spinel all day, I might be able to at least help a little.”

Steven glances away, seemingly thinking about the offer. “Well... okay. But please, if we get her memories back and she starts to attack me again, please just run and get help. I know we have her scythe now and that wouldn’t affect you anyway, but she could still hurt you,” Steven pleads, looking at you with concern.

You nod in agreement. “I promise that if there’s nothing I can do to reason with her, I will run and get help and not try to fight.”

He smiles weakly at you and motions to Lion. “Ok then. Let’s go after her.”

You hop on behind Steven and burst out the front of the warehouse to see the Mayor still waiting for stragglers.

“Oh, Steven! Y/n! Some people are missing from the shelters!” She remarks in an inquisitive tone.

Steven ignores her and asks, “Did you see a pink Gem run by?”

Mayor Nanafua points out across the water- back towards the Temple and the injector. Lion speeds ahead, dashing across the water.

“Thank you, Mayor!” You call out, hoping she’ll be able to find everyone that’s missing.

It takes Lion a few minutes to get across the water back towards Beach City. In the meantime, Steven collapses forward onto Lion’s mane, clutching at his gem.

“Steven?!” You ask in shock, “What’s the matter?”

“Just this morning everything was perfect,” he replies sadly, his words muffled by thick pink hair, “Why did everything have to change?”

You sigh and look up at the looming injector, and the inviting Temple at the base of it. “I don’t know, Steven. But this is just...temporary, ok? We can fix everything and still be happy after this.” You chuckle to yourself before you speak again, “It’s not the end of the world!”

Steven smiles half-heartedly. “Well...it kinda is. But thanks, Y/n.”

You nod, focusing your attention back towards the cliffside. A piece of Earth crumbles down, just nearly missing Steven’s home. As you near the house, the newly built observatory begins to glow, signifying the use of the warp pad.

“That might be her,” Steven says as you both dismount Lion. He turns towards the pink animal and says, “Go find Connie. We need all hands on deck for this one.”

At Steven’s command, Lion creates a portal for himself and bounds through it, leaving you two standing in the wake of the temple. A wave of uneasiness passes over you- which version of Spinel are you going to find in there? If she ran off, she must have remembered something.

“I hope she’s okay...” you find yourself thinking.

You and Steven rush up the stairs to the observatory, and he holds a hand out in front of you just before you reach the entrance, a silent warning to stay back until he can see her condition. You nod, and stand just out of sight, nerves all over the place.

“Spinel?” Steven asks timidly. He motions to you that it’s ok to step forward.

“She must still be her reset-self,” you think as you follow him into the observatory. Sure enough, you’re greeted with the sight of her heart shaped pigtails turned away from you as she sits on the warp pad.

“Spinel, what’s wrong?” you ask quietly, approaching her slowly. She turns at the sound of your voice, and you can see big tears streaming down her face, her features contorted in sorrow. She sniffles pathetically, gazing between you and Steven with big, gleaming eyes.

“I just...started getting these feelings flooding back to me!” Spinel exclaims, turning away from you again and clutching her head.

“That’s...that’s good! I need you to remember,” Steven says, approaching her with confidence and joining her on the warp pad. You scurry up next to him, wanting to continue to help.

“If you don’t remember, something really bad will happen to me and- and my home, and Y/n,” Steven finishes, putting a comforting hand on Spinel’s back. You kneel down next to her on the left, and try to peer around to see her face.

“Hey, it’s ok, Spinel...please, can you remember anything? Do you remember the Garden?”

She gazes in your eyes a moment, before her head snaps up to the sky. She grins for a split second, and then her face falls, and she slams her hands on the warp pad in agony.

“NO!”

The pad activates before you have time to react, and you’re floating through the stream, using all your power to focus on not drifting out.

Ahead of you, Steven calls out to the pink Gem. “Spinel, where are we going?”

“Back. To where I never left,” she answers softly. You can barely hear her among the sound of the warp. Suddenly, gravity comes rushing back up to meet you, and you land on the warp pad with a thud. Steven and Spinel land upright, and the latter rushes down off the platform.

“Spinel!” you call out, scrambling to your feet and rushing after her, with Steven next to you.

“This was our Garden...a special world, built just for Pink and I,” Spinel explains, a faraway look in her eye. She gazes out over the landscape as if she’s watching a memory occur in front of her; she doesn’t take notice of you and Steven, but continues talking all the same.

“On Homeworld, Pink was so lonely and sad, but not here! Here we would play for hours...every day was so much fun! At least, that’s what I thought...”

She turns towards what looks like a statue in the center of the Garden, and seems to break out of her memories.

“Did something happen?” you ask softly, watching her expression closely.

“Pink wanted a colony, more than anything. One day, her wish came true! Blue and Yellow gave Pink her very own planet! Earth...I was so excited! A brand new place to play!”

Steven tips his head in confusion, “So...why didn’t you go with her?”

Spinel’s face morphs into something you’ve never seen on her before- no emotion whatsoever.

“Pink...showed me a game she wanted me to play while she went to Earth. ‘Stand very still’, she told me. I thought it would be so much fun...”

As Spinel recounts the tale of her life- if you could even call it that- you feel like you want to throw up. “She was asked to stand still to wait for Pink...she wasn’t even forced, like Pearl was about keeping Rose’s true identity secret. Spinel stayed out of loyalty, out of love...this is so fucked up,” you think, as Spinel continues.

“Finally, some news came. About how it all ended. I saw the broadcast, how Pink...doesn’t exist now, survived by her son. And all of her friends back on Earth.”

She races over to what you thought was a statue, and pulls up a screen, which has Steven playing on a loop.

“He just got back from doing that earlier today,” you think, horrified. “She was stuck here until this morning?”

A fresh wave of nausea rolls over you as Spinel finishes her story.

“Aren’t I a fool to have happily listened...to have stayed...”

As she trails off, she begins to glow, and you watch unmoving as Spinel’s form changes. Her gem flips, her ponytails grow longer and spiky, and she grows taller. The light fades, and you can see that she’s back to how she was when you first saw her- darker, sadder, angrier.

She stays facing away for you and Steven, and you’re about to say something to her, before Steven beats you to the punch.

“S-Spinel! You got your memories back...I can’t believe Mom did that to you.” A beat of silence. “Well, actually, I can totally believe it. You’re not the only one she hurt.”

Steven approaches her, a friendly hand stretched out. Suddenly Spinel turns on him, growing in size and throwing him to the ground, a fist raised threateningly.

“Yeah, you must know all about her life without me! Rub it in why don’tcha?!”

“No, it’s not like that!” Steven exclaims while trying to summon his shield, “You deserve a better friend!”

Spinel blinks in surprise. With a yell, she turns back towards the communication device and punches it to pieces. You recoil slightly, not wanting a rogue rock to strike you. Speaking of rogue rocks...

You turn back to Spinel, who just sighs and crumples onto the floor. Your concern for her overtakes your fear of her, and you step tentatively to her side, crouching down next to her.

“Spinel, I... I’m so sorry about what you went through. As a human, I... genuinely can’t imagine what that must have been like. Waiting for eons... But I’m sorry all the same.”

You try to look her in the eye, but she avoids your gaze, turning her head away from you. You glance back at Steven, silently asking for help.

“Spinel, come back and save the Earth with me. You can start over there,” he reassures her. “You can make new friends.”

He holds out a hand to her, and she stands and turns to him, leaving you trailing behind them both. Had you done something to upset her?

“As long as he thinks this will work...I’ll trust him,” you think. You can’t help feeling a bit put off by Spinel not wanting to even talk to you, but you suppose she has a lot of complicated feelings towards Steven right now.

“Someday, you’ll love again,” Steven reassures Spinel as she takes his hand tentatively, “You just need to find someone who treats you better. “

He keeps glancing at you and the warp pad repeatedly, and you can tell he feels a bit awkward, talking to Spinel like this. You almost wish he’d let you keep trying- she may not trust either of you, but you’re not so sure Steven really feels up to this sort of emotional baggage right now.

He continues leading her forward, eventually breaking off from her hand and running up to the warp pad, motioning for you to join him. You quickly follow him, eager to get back to Earth. Warping around Earth with Pearl is one thing, but being in space...you look up through the glass that’s separating you and the endless sky. You suddenly feel very, very small.

Spinel looks past you, barely taking notice of you as she gazes at Steven. Spinel is making you feel small, too. You furrow your brow as you look between the two of them, but the warp activates before you can think further. You’re left hanging in the air again, struggling to get the hang of all the warping, but this time when the warp stops you land on your feet, at least. You celebrate at the small victory, and rush after Steven as he exits. At the doorway, you pause- Spinel is still standing on the platform, her eyes looking far away.

“C’mon, Spinel,” you say quietly, offering her a hopeful smile. She finally seems to see you, and she snaps out of whatever trance she was in, wiping at the tears that had formed in her eyes.

“Y-yeah, ok...” She seems to grow shy again as she rushes past you, leaving you to follow her and Steven once again.

The three of you enter Steven’s bedroom, and you both start to head down the stairs.

“We’re back!” Steven calls out in a sing-song voice, looking happier than you’ve seen him all day.

“Hi everyone!” You say, waving at the three Crystal Gems from the stairs. You turn towards Spinel, who is hesitating at the top of the steps, out of sight from the others.

“Come on down!” you urge gently.

“Won’t they all be...not exactly incredibly thrilled to see me like this?” She asks, pointing to her markings.

“Oh Spinel...” you say softly, your heart hurting for the Gem.

“We just have to talk to them,” Steven answers simply, giving her a small smile. Her expression shifts to one of trust, and she heads down the stairs into view, standing between you and Steven.

“Wh-what?!” Pearl cries out. She and Amethyst instantly get into battle mode, both pulling out their weapons and taking a defensive stance. You feel Spinel shift next to you, hiding behind you and Steven timidly.

“Oh, Spinel! Did you change your hair?” Garnet asks innocently.

“Woah woah woah! Spinel got her memories back, but she’s not gonna hurt us!” Steven says to the Gems. You nod frantically in agreement, hoping they’ll put away their weapons.

“Everything’s chill!” Steven reassures, relaxing slightly when the Gems don’t pursue the attack further.

A bright light in the corner of the room makes you shield your eyes, and Spinel is so startled that she grips your arm on accident. Connie and Lion emerge from the portal, and Connie lets out a battle cry as she flips off of Lion.

“I’m here! Where’s the fight?” She calls out, looking around the room rapidly.

“Ah, there’s no fight, Connie!” you reply quickly, “Everything’s fine! Also it’s nice to see you!”

Connie relaxes and gives you a smile and a wave. “Oh! Hi, Y/n!”

Suddenly, Greg walks out of the bathroom, and the group below rounds on him, startled by the sudden appearance. He holds up his hands defensively and says, “Okay okay, I’ll wash my hands!”

As Greg walks back into the bathroom, Steven sighs and slumps forward. “Whew...okay! Spinel, can I ask you a favor?” he asks, some desperation creeping into his voice.

“Are you kidding? Anything!” she replies gleefully.

As Steven explains what they need her to do with the injector, you can’t help thinking that this could all work out in the end. Spinel is about to get rid of the injector, and once Garnet’s memories are back things will go back to normal!

“Well...not entirely. We’ll still have Spinel around...but that’s ok, right?” you think, questioning internally. “She seems okay now, and she could make a new life here like everyone else has.”

x * x * x * x * x

You’re reminded of earlier today as you follow the group down the stairs and out to the injector. Only this time, most of your friends have their memories back, and you’re not in the dark about how to save the world. So as you make the trek up the hill for the fourth time that day, you’re actually relaxed and looking forward to the rest of the evening.

You spot the New Crystal Gems up ahead, monitoring the injector still. You catch the tail end of their conversation as Peridot remarks, “That is bad! We’re hitting critical mass!” You assume she’s referring to the bio-poison, and you can’t help but feel thankful that you and Steven were able to get to Spinel in time and convince her to call it off. You look towards the pink Gem, who is currently hiding behind Steven, looking worried at the attention that’s on her.

“Steven, what’s the status on Spinel?!” Peridot asks worriedly.

“She’s back, and she’s here to help,” Steven replies easily. Spinel nods to him and moves towards her injector, her left pinky stretching into the shape of a horn that she blows into. She definitely seems...stretchier in this form, if the height and the pinky is anything to go by.

The injector floats off the mountain, and everyone breathes a sigh of relief, and the group cheers and high fives each other. You look at your friends and let out a breath, finally able to let your worries go after a long day. You glance back at Spinel and give her a tentative thumbs up, accompanied with a small smile for the Gem. Her eyes dart between your face and your hand, and she copies the gesture hesitantly.

Next to her, Steven holds out his hand as a gesture of gratitude. “Thanks, Spinel,” he says happily.

“Aw, gee, what are friends for?” She laughs nervously, shaking the boy’s hand. Steven nods and turns back to the group, a determined look on his face.

“Okay, we’ve almost cleaned up this mess. Now all we need are Garnet’s memories and my powers, and we can all get back to living happily ever after! What could work for Garnet? Something about fusion, something about love...”

As Steven trails off into though, you can’t help but fixate on Spinel. She looks...worried, for some reason. Her brows are creased, and she’s standing awkwardly, as though she doesn’t quite feel like she belongs.

As you watch her, she seems to find the courage to speak, her voice small and scared. “What about me?”

“Huh?” Steven questions simply, turning back to Spinel.

“Is that all you needed me for? To turn off my injector?”

“No! Well, sort of, but not-”

“W-what now? I-I did what you wanted, that’s it?”

“Well, yeah! We can just forget this whole thing ever happened!” Steven says with a half-hearted shrug and an attempt at a comforting smile.

You look between the two, conflicted on how to feel. On one hand, you can’t fault Steven for wanting to rush to get Garnet back and return to normal, but on the other hand...after everything you just learned about Spinel back in the garden, you’re surprised Steven is being so blasé about this. You don’t want Spinel to feel left behind and forgotten again. But life still has to move on.

“How ya gonna forget with me around?” Spinel answers, slipping into the accent you first heard her speak in this afternoon, “I’m the source of all your problems! Don’t pretend you want me here!”

You try to interject, “Spinel, I-”

But she’s already spiraling down with worry, unable to stop her anxious thoughts, her eyes never leaving Steven. “You gonna put me somewhere? You gonna leave me somewhere? You gonna leave me alone?!”

Your face blanches. Of course she would be worried, but she needs to be able to move on from this, at least for now. Garnet is important too...

“Spinel...” Steven says, apparently at a loss for words. He approaches her timidly, trying to comfort her, but she shoves him back with a shout. Steven falls to the floor and you wince. With his powers gone, he can’t be doing too well right now.

As he hits the ground, the rejuvenator flies out of his pocket and bounces towards the rest of the group. Garnet takes interest and before anyone can stop her, she presses the button and unfurls the weapon for all to see.

“Garnet, no-!” Steven races over to grab the weapon from her, taking care of where he’s aiming the scythe.

“Why do you...have that?” Spinel deadpans, her eyes wide.

You feel like smacking your forehead. Of all the places he could have kept it... the house, the storage garage, even Greg’s van...why did he keep it?

“I was...just carrying it,” Steven answers, looking anxiously at the weapon. “I didn’t have anywhere else to put it.”

“Spinel, please believe him,” you chime in, “Whatever you’re thinking, it’s not-”

“We can just forget this ever happened,” she says, her eyes narrowing. “You mean I can just forget this ever happened!” She gives a fake laugh and then growls out, “What a plan!”

This is too much. You start to step back, afraid of what she might do next, ready to run if she rounds on you. You’re trained by Pearl, yes, but...you have a feeling training might not help much with this Gem.

Spinel continues, “I turn off the injector, and then the moment my back is turned, presto! Change-o! Problem solved! Well think again, you’re not gettin’ rid of me that easy!”

She extends her pinky into the horn again and blows, directing the injector to land directly on Steven. Your eyes go wide and you scramble, willing your legs to move quickly. You try to move out of the way in time, and you make it a good distance, but the impact still sends you flying, knocking your head on the ground, almost catapulting you over a cliff that was formed by the injector. Luckily, you come to a stop before you’re flung over.

Your ears are ringing, there’s dust everywhere, and you can barely see. Maybe you hit your head harder than you thought. But you can just make out a voice coming from the cavern down below.

“-want me like THIS?!”

It’s Spinel. She sounds angry, upset, desperate. Maybe you can still try to talk some sense into her, though you’re not entirely sure that’s possible at this point.

“Spinel? Are you down there?” You call out to the Gem.

“Ah, looks like we still got an audience!” she says menacingly. Arms shoot towards you from below, and you’re too shaken to react in time- she's wrapped around you and is dragging you in towards her. “How about a front row seat?”

“Spinel, please!” you cry out, “I know Steven, he would never do something like that to you!”

Her eyes narrow as she looks into yours. “Oh yeah? The whole time I was the old me, he barely acknowledged me! I know he doesn’t want me here. I know it!”

She squeezes you tighter out of anger as she fixes her gaze on Steven. “C’mon, you wanna attack me! Just admit it! Or better yet, just try it!”

“Spinel, STOP!” you plead, squirming to try to get free. You anxiously look up at the cliff side, willing any of the Gems to appear to get you and Steven out of this mess.

“No! No one wants me around!” She yells, but then pauses and glances at you, something like realization flashing in her eyes. Her voice softens as she says, “Except...you treated me differently. You actually...talked to me.”

She rounds on Steven once more and shouts, “Y/n is the only one who ever treated me like anything more than a burden! Who treated me like an equal, and not some dumb innocent...thing!” You glance back at your captor, surprised at her words. She was someone who you thought could have been a friend after everything. Not now, though. Not after this.

Spinel has a crazed look in her eyes, and you truly believe she wants Steven to attack her, just to prove a point. But you notice she’s also holding back tears- she's eternally in conflict with her emotions, it seems.

Steven finally finds the strength to stand, still holding the rejuvenator. “You know that’s not-”

“You want me gone so bad? FINE. But I’m taking HER with me!” She cries out, clutching you even tighter, trying to hold onto whatever comfort she seems to find in you.

“What? No. No she can’t,” you think frantically, “She has nowhere to go-”

But before you know it, she’s moving out of the canyon fast, unbelievably fast, up onto the injector, with you still wrapped tightly in her clutches. As you’re being dragged away, you see Pearl and Amethyst moving towards you, weapons at the ready. You can’t let this continue any longer.

“Pearl, Amethyst, stop!” You shout out, hoping they can hear you. “Just let me handle this, please! I can talk to her, just focus on fixing the Earth!”

You know the Gems, and you know Steven- they'd probably ignore most other things to go after you, especially with Garnet not here to hold them back.

Spinel scoffs as you finish calling out to your friends but doesn’t comment further. You scowl at her, powerless to do anything but watch as she removes the injector with a call and sends it speeding across the ocean.

“What exactly is your plan here?” You spit out, “You have no idea where anything is. They’re gonna find this injector so quickly, what are you even do-”

“Just can it, won’t cha?!” Spinel shouts back, and wraps a stretched hand around your mouth, shutting you up for the time being. She sits with her back to you, chin in her hands, staring out at the rising sun. So you just watch as you drift across the ocean towards some place neither of you know yet.

And then you’re gone.

#spinel #pas de deux #spinel fic #spinel x reader #spinel reader #spinel steven universe #steven universe #steven universe fanfiction #spinel fanfiction #spinel x reader fic

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d0gdaze · 4 years

Text

read on ao3

wc: 2120 warnings: mild crude language

__________________________________________________

Richie listens to Eddie ramble on about personal protective equipment, stringing his words together with such urgency that they're constantly clashing and stammering to the point of it being nearly nonsensical, and wonders boldly if he's ever going to get tired of hearing it.

It's mid afternoon and they're all down in the barrens, having escaped the worst of the day's heat by taking refuge playing board games at Richie's house, air-con blasting, – Maggie had made up frozen watermelon slices for them and they'd gorged themselves. Now, still all sticky from where the juice ran down their chins and their hands, they're making up for the lost hours by attentively scouring the thick brush near where the barrens border the city landfill, looking for anything remotely interesting. Most of it's just random junk, but occasionally they'll find new furniture for the clubhouse, or dead electronics that they can take apart, or broken televisions with intact fibreglass screens they can sling rocks at and shatter. Sometimes they'll hit a goldmine and find a tangled but otherwise functional yo-yo or cassette tapes that still work when they run back home to try them out. It's not really about the finds, though. It's just, plainly put, something to do.

Beverly's knee deep in shrubbery, kicking at a doorless microwave to see if she can dislodge something, and Mike and Bill are flipping through an old playboy magazine thats pages have gone wavy from water damage, and the cover is so sun-bleached that it's nearly completely white. Stan stayed back at the edge of the clearing when the rest of them moved further into the brush, concerned about bugs and poison ivy and blackberry bushes and content to do his searching in the shallow parts. Ben's the furthest in, and as far as Richie can tell he's not doing much other than looking out over the dump and probably dozing off on the fallen log he's sat upon. Richie himself is squatting down, using a long stick to poke through the contents of a garbage bag he's ripped open. It's just household trash, and it smells rather bad, but it's a way to keep his hands moving while he zones out. And Eddie's managed to get himself up onto a low fork in a tree, sitting with his back up against the trunk and legs hanging on either side of the thick branch, idly kicking at the air as he rants about why what they're doing is dangerous and the precautionary measures they should be taking, but without actually suggesting they stop doing it, or making any attempts to leave.

The air is filled with that kind of quiet, static warmth that leaves you pleasantly tired all the way through your body, – the kind that makes your shoulders slump and your gate slow, and the minutes seem to stretch on for hours for the seven of them. It's one of those days where nothing much happens, one that won't ever be memorable or out of the ordinary in any way, where they'll go home sleepy and satisfied, and when their parents ask what they did all day – those of them whose parents care enough to ask – they can say 'nothing' and mean it. And that's just fine by them. They'd all take an uneventful, boring day like this over some of the days they'd faced before – the ones that left scars and gaps and nightmares, the memories of which seem to fade with each passing week and it's all fuzzy and disjointed and – no, today is good. That's all that matters.

Richie feels something small bounce off the space between his shoulder blades and looks up, only for something else to hit him right in the middle of the forehead as Eddie looks down at him, very obviously trying not to grin so the corners of his mouth twitch, and when they lock eyes he bites his lip and throws another piece of tree bark. This one taps Richie's cheek and falls to the ground in front of him, and Eddie snickers like it's the funniest thing he's seen all day.

“You're gonna get splinters if you keep that up, dipshit,” he says, smirking as panic flashes across Eddie's face, though it quickly dissipates into a scowl, and he continues flicking pieces at him, more rapidly now.

“Asshole. Why the fuck would you say that?” he spits, and Richie has to hold his arms up to shield himself from the onslaught. “You're the one who's gonna get fucking splinters.”

Richie stands, picking up his stick and turning his back to the tree. He manages to hook the end of it on a particularly gross looking wad of paper towel from the pile of trash, and when he turns back around and makes a jabbing motion towards Eddie, the other boy screeches indignantly and falls off the branch. He lands with a thud on the ground and immediately scrambles to his feet. Richie lunges at him again, cackling, as Eddie starts spewing insults and hollering disgust. He picks up an empty tin can and throws it, landing somewhere a couple feet to Richie's left.

Something about it leaves Richie with a vague feeling of deja vu, but that happens so often these days that he doesn't think much of it.

Eddie backs his way out to the clearing, creating whatever distance he can by throwing whatever his hands come across, though he hardly lands any hits, and Richie taunts him the whole way up, never intending to do more than tease, never planning on causing actual harm.

(Eddie knows this, of course.)

Stan starts to lecture him too, though far more calmly, more comprehensible. Tells him not to be disgusting, tells them both to shut up and knock it off. He's smiling though, Richie can tell, even when he tries to hide it.

Here's to nothing ever changing, he thinks.

Later, when the sun isn't bearing down as heavily and a relieving breeze starts to flow in from the east, they find themselves traversing away from the shady greenery of the barrens towards the open bank along the Kenduskeag, where the water is fast-moving but shallow enough that Bill doesn't roll his jean shorts up even though they fall down a little past his knees. He's right out in the middle of the stream, eyes trained steadily downwards as he takes slow, calculated steps, looking out for crawfish tails peeking out from under the rocks. Eddie's next to him, mirroring his actions though seemingly less focused, as he keeps letting his gaze drift over to the others. Stan's about fifty feet upstream, talking to Mike and occasionally gesturing animatedly at the tree line. Mike laughs heartedly at something he says, and the sound floats drifts all the way across to where Richie is busy pulling out clumps of grass and flinging them into the water, and Ben is sitting with his knees pulled up to his chest, his attention fixed on Beverly, whose found a flat-topped rock that's big enough for her to lay down on, albeit with her legs hanging off the edge. She's on her back, her hair splayed out over the stone, which fully exposes the fading bruise that starts in the outer corner of her eye and curves in patches down the side of her face.

He lets out a deep sigh and buries his face in his arms.

“Careful Benjamin,” Richie says, reaching over and sprinkling blades of grass onto his hair, “you're being obvious again.”

Ben blushes, slaps his hand away and tries to shake the grass off. The action gets rid of some of it, falling back onto the ground or his shoulders, but there's still bits of green sticking out here and there. Richie grins, and shuffles closer so his knee knocks against Ben's shin.

“I keep tellin' you to just go talk to her,” he continues, “save us all from this will-they-won't-they crap.”

“I talk to her all the time,” Ben replies in a way that fails to acknowledge the point, and Richie repays it with another fistful of freshly pulled grass. He shakes it off again, sputtering as some of the pieces fall into his face.

“Ah, you know what I mean,” Richie wipes his hands off on his pants and leans back on his elbows, looks back across to where Bill and Eddie seem to have recruited Stan and Mike, and Mike's got a stick that he's using to pry the rocks up so that Bill can look underneath. Stan and Eddie are talking over each other, and a little too far away that he can't quite make out what they're saying. Eddie starts laughing at something Stan says, and Richie laughs too, though under his breath and without really meaning to. Ben looks at Richie, then over to the others, and back again.

“I just think, Haystack,” Richie continues, hesitantly tearing his gaze away to meet his, “that if you really like someone, you should sack up and tell 'em. No point brooding over it forever.”

“I think you shouldn't say things like brooding and sack up in the same breath.”

“What can I say, I'm an intellectual.”

“You're a hypocrite is what you are,” Ben says, and Richie scoffs, “what, you're saying you ain't ever liked someone and just kept it to yourself?”

“I never liked anyone, period,” Richie says defensively, sitting up again and resting his chin in his hands, “'cept maybe Eddie's mom.”

Ben sighs softly. Richie instinctively looks towards Eddie again, but his attention is all Bill's at the moment, who's actually managed to find one of the mudbugs and is holding it tentatively just above the water as the other three crowd around him. Stan's talking in that quick, steady way that Richie knows to mean what he's saying is somewhat informational, and Mike appears to be petting the damn thing as it sits in Bill's hands.

“Bull,” Ben laughs, just a beat too late for it to flow properly with the rest of the conversation. Richie frowns at him.

“Whaddaya mean, bull? It's the truth,” Richie insists, but Ben just looks at him, exasperated. “Or, fine. Whatever. Maybe I like one person but,” he starts picking at the grass with one hand, continuing to hold up his head with the other, his elbow digging into his knee, “it's different.”

“How's it different?”

“I don't know,” he groans, “it just is.”

“Who-,” Ben starts, but is cut off by Eddie as he calls out to them from across the way.

“Richie!” he yells excitedly, “Ben, guys, come get a load o' this thing Bill found!”

Richie can hear Bill telling him to turn down the volume, sees Eddie poke his tongue out at him then continue waving over to them with a sense of urgency, as if anything could be so urgent these days.

Richie sticks his hand up in acknowledgement, flings one last bunch of grass into Ben's lap and heaves himself up onto his feet in one clumsy movement. He starts to jog over to the group, until they're all flinging their arms at him and telling him to slow down, to stop kicking up so much water, until Eddie's voice has gone up an octave as he begins another tangent and Richie brings his leg back as if he's going to send a tidal wave flying at the lot of them, but doesn't follow through with movement.

Ben watches, for a moment, the way Eddie gravitates to Richie even while scolding him, sees how Richie almost subconsciously reaches out to touch him, pulls him closer like he's practiced it a million times before.

(He has, of course.)

If Ben realises something, he won't say it. He's hit with the feeling that maybe Richie hasn't yet, not fully at least.

Beverly, roused by the calamity, leaves her perch and joins them, not before pulling Ben to his feet with a smile playing at her lips. Her hair, though slightly dishevelled, has fallen back to it's natural frame around her face, obscuring the bruise once again. There's a slight pink tinge left over from last week's sunburn, overshadowed by the freckles that are more vibrant than ever now. Even from the small, modest contact of her hands on his, he can feel the sun radiating off her skin, and already knows he would bask in it forever if she'd let him.

By the time they reach the rest of them, Bill's already let the crawfish back into the water. It scurries back under the rock where they found it.

It's doesn't matter too much, though. It's summer, and they're kids, and days like this are countless.

tag list:

@reddie-to-go @reddietofall @thecastlebyers

#writing #reddie #reddie fic #benverly #it 2017 #you CAN go back to childhood folks

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beacon-sanctuary · 4 years

Text

Chapter 2: Class decisions and dorm warfare for the win!

introduction, Ch.1

Note to self: next time Bean and Merlin fight, get popcorn, and maybe grab wall rubble, I’m not a hoarder, scouts honor~

I looked up at the teachers with stars in my eyes, everyone was so cool! Plus, I got a head pat-so that’s even better! Ugh, why’d you guys have to make so hard to choose a class, hmmm let’s put our suspects, up shall we? Looking at the professors, I saw the grumpy Alchemist guy, his pale wood patterned skin shone in the lights above as once more those dang amber eyes of his bore into my mind. Like chill man, how can putting a baton in your jacket be mind warfare?! Huff, he looked so cool during the show but ehhh, too strict for me.

Well, Rasputin’s a no I guess, number 2, Louis Armstrong, seems like a fun guy, buuut I have no musical talent, got two left feet, voice sounds like a banshee bleh, ain’t a good fit. It’s not you Louis it’s me, sorry man. Onto suspect 3, Hobo Billy the kid, chill, kinda dusty, but I’m not stealthy, wouldn’t have light-up shoes if I was after all. Suspect 4 come on down! Here we have Joan of Arc, awesome sword wielder and dealer of cherished head pats, 9/10 we might have a winner here people.

Now onto suspe-oh no megaphone man’s back, just in case, I pulled my beanie over my ears, no hearing loss for me.

“Ah, jolly good show everyone! It was quite a sight to see, I must say, now children, if that display did not solidify your choice-well buck up! We’ve decided to allow our professors the chance to remind you of their profession and the meaning behind each class! And remember no class is better or worse than the ot-”

“Guerillas are best, don’t listen to the loudspeaker” Izusa jabbed in

“Heheheh, Izusa I am glad for your class pride still runs deep, but we are headmasters, after all, we need to be unbiased! Let our bright youths decide for themselves!”

“Unbiased, you have your freaking Knight necktie on” She fired back motioning to his stripped blue silver tie which he straightened.

“Well, of course, one must never forget their roots after all, and even though I myself favored our knights here, this is not-” Before he could finish, a sharp “Shush” interjected. Professor Blum strode forward hand massaging his temple.

“If we listen to this squabble any longer, we shall not move anywhere, and I would like to return to my facility before night comes if you don’t mind.” Fixing his overcoat, the amber eyes of the earth magi quickly returned to the crowd, piercing them with a cool stare as he began to speak once more.

“To you lot” he admonished us snapping his arm, “Listen well, for I shall only say this once. Despite what the news or the media has led you to believe, Alchemists are those who study and pick apart the gears of magic and the world for all its worth.” When he said news and media he spat out each word as if it were venom in his mouth, and as he began to go on, the methodical style of his speech began to ebb more into a stately passion.

“We are no mere scientists, we are alchemists! The fusion of creativity and scientific reasoning to understand, this little thing we call magic. Despite the moniker of “Youngest class,” Human, Magi, or whatever in between that’s shuffled about on this rock has always been curious of this force in our world. Whether you trace our origins to the wizards and warlocks of old, or to the Alchemists of which we’ve gained our title, we are both and neither of our predecessors!”

Pacing a bit, he calmed his voice back down as he continued on, “Were our ancestors simply explored the capabilities or tried to pick apart magic for their own uses, we have a different goal. We carry the light of knowledge, illuminating the unknown for our fellow people so that they may find comfort in said findings. If you choose this path, burn this into your mind! If you have no passion or hunger for finding the secrets of magic and our world, then as soon as you enter my facility, you. shall. be. Gone! I do not want to hear your complaining, “Oh it’s too hard,” or, “ Oh, it’s too boring” for if I see one hint of uninterest in your eyes, I'll throw you out myself! For if you have no passion or drive in your field what is the point of you? Now then,”

After a long sigh, he quietly composed himself, “if you feel this is right for you, step forward now.” he crooned out. And to my left, I felt a rustle beside me Orion groaned up and walked towards the old magi, he gave me a two-finger salute and lazily walked forward. And as everyone saw him go, bit by bit more people stood in front of Rasputin, as each was handed some black clothes in a bag. And as if on cue, a sharp whistle broke the silence, bringing all our eyes on Billy the kid.

“Alright, kiddos eyes on me for a sec’. Thanks to ole grandpa given that essay, I’ll be straight with ya. Guerillas are the rebels, outlaws, anarchists, or whatever they call us now. Where there's some rules we break 'em, were there's laws we go past 'em. We be the judge of those in power, that roarin' flame under they feet that keep our leaders in check. And if they go too far, well, this lil' fire finna burst into an inferno I'll promise ya that. If ya got freedom and rebellion in ya chest. We yo people, see a riot, we in there, see a protest, we in there, and if you see a revolution? Hoo boy, you sure as heck know we in there! We carry the light of freedom and change, always there to stop a leader if they go too far and if they do, we gon' hold 'em accountable and make somethin' new. If my words struck home, we be happy to have ya, welcome to the family kiddos.” legs dangling over the stage the professor watched as the future Guerillas approached, heck even one girl flew up and gave a high five to him. Thanks to her wings, she was an air magi, had some golden-brown wings and storm grey hair, and perched atop the stage as her classmates rushed up too.

At my right, I heard a grunt as freaking Joan of Arc hopped off her pommel and kicked the sword in her hand like it was nothing! Yup, definitely joining her I don’t care what anyone says-Imma be a knight!

“Heh, alrighty, may as well start, hmph” She grunted, holding her sword in a rigid pose. If I’m being honest her face looked like she was constipated “to be a knight you be gallant, focused measured precise and powerful, my children take up arms your calling is nye it is time for a crusade! We shall take back the holy land,Deus vult, DEUS VU-pfffft, heheheh, sorry I had to” she chuckled leaning on her sheath “Oh, that never gets old, ok serious time now” she took in a breath to speak but

“Ah, it seems the impossible did happen, you being serious” Rasputin interjected walking past her, to this he received a light snicker

“Listen I can be serious sometimes, on occasion, when I feel like it, every few years. But, as I was saying before mister essay interrupted me, Knights are old as heck alright, we’re the first beacons, defend people for generations, all that good stuff. But just cause we got knight in our name, don’t mean we’re Chivalrous, glistening warriors who vanquish evil to the ends of the earth that’s only a third of the pie, we’re not just warriors, we’re healers and guardians kids. The sword, shield, and healing hand, we become that light. We guard against the dark and give people a haven. In more than one way! So,” she said resting her sword over her shoulders,

“If you want to be a knight, grab some chainmail and a tunic from the stage and come to my class tomorrow. I’d be happy to have you” She winked strolling out. Yeeep, I’m all in let’s freaking go! I cheered in my mind, but I had a feeling I had a dopey smile on my face all the same.

After that, not much else happened, learned about the other two classes, Artificers, basically artists, builders, and all that fun stuff that entertains or helps people. And seekers, explorers, and stuff, always run headfirst into the unknown and hard to pin down. But by the end I got some bag of clothes and a rune stone. It was a smooth navy-blue rock with a messed-up F burnt into it. It felt warm and hummed a bit in my hand as I turned a bit, it was like a weird magic compass to my dorm I guess, this is so cool! Welp, into your prison-I mean my bag little guy. As I was putting my stone back in my bag, a gun shot made me nearly drop it on the ground.

“Gah! what is this, give Eir a heart attack day?!” I mumbled clamping my stone as Headmaster Ortiz cleared his throat.

“Knights, Alchemists, Seekers, Guerillas, and Artificers, thank you all for continuing in the protection of Human-Magi kind. This is the first step of your journey as Beacons! For even having the courage to step up this far, you should be proud! Bully indeed for you! I already can see great potential in all of you, all I can say is good luck, and may your lights always shine bright.” He finished his final speech and gave us all a hearty laugh and warm smile before walking into the back as Izusa made her way to speak.

“Alright Torches, like the headmaster megaphone said, this is your start, remember you all wanted this, so get ready, tomorrow starts four years of hell, have fun~” she sang away into the darkness from whence she came.

After the speeches of fluff and doom we all dispersed to our new dorms, which for some freaking reason was on the of the fort! School’s in the middle, makes sense, access to everything, but the dorms. At the very edge of the freaking coast, who designed this and where can I smack them with my bag? I’m going helicopter them so bad won’t know what hit them. But still, I walked to my dorm. Weird F rune dash 5 as the stone in my hand vibrated more and more the closer I got to my door. The jade-gold rune patterned carpet sat atop a shining wood floor and the air had a scent of strangely chocolate, and fire?

“Who’s burning something?” I thought aloud, but right as the words came out of my mouth, the wall right across from me shattered as a flaming girl bulldozed through while a hand patted me on the head. Whirling my head from side to side I saw Orion standing besides me snickering at the dragon girl. She had two jagged black horns sticking out of her messy flame like curls. She was short but had a stocky frame, I think I even saw a few muscles if I’m being honest. And as I saw her gold eyes stare daggers at Orion(nickname still pending) a wicked smile seared across her face, disrupting the red scales upon her cheeks.

“Orio get back over here so I can hit ya!” She growled in her rough voice, to which Orion strolled across from me with a playful shrug

“nahhh, don’t really feel like it sunflower, good offer though, you’re getting’ better at em, I’m proud!”

“Tsk, I told ya before, I ain’t no little flower, I am the sun!” she yelled crouching down for probably another charge. Orion chuckled as he held his free hand at his ear

“Uh, say that again white dwarf, I ain’t hear ya~” he teased, and at that my eyes even glared at him,

“Please don’t my ears have suffered enough for a day!” I groaned,

But as at the girl, it seemed like she physically had a tick mark on her head as the whole room heated up to 90 degrees. I had to take off my hat and fan myself, what the freak did he say to make her that mad? But unfortunately, I got no answer as the girl barreled forward with a battle cry. Careening towards Orion before I saw him poof out of existence in a blue flash before reappearing behind the solar magi. He placed a hand on her back and caused it to steam, but what instantly caught my attention was two words that slithered from his mouth.

“Liga Hostem” he said, and yanked his hand back as multiple black and blue chains wrapped around the girl, battling against the fire and the light she gave off. Making the hallway as wicked battle of heat and cold. Gasping from excitement I rapidly said

“You used a binding spell! It’s not the full incantation but that’s still awesome! Wait, your element doesn’t usually go into that unle-“

“let’s save this for later, I ain’t tryin’ be bbq magi over here” to further his point the girl took in a deep breath and bellowed out a stream of flames in the boy’s direction, cursing under his breath Orion slammed his hand on the ground and cried

“Fortifico!” as a black and blue hexagon of swirling void, blocked the incoming flames, and as soon as the barrier was released, the girl charged forward with an knee aimed at Orion’s fac, he rolled back and threw a punch at her stomach, but she brushed it to the side. Back and forth they parried and dodged each other’s blows like clockwork. Oh I wish I had popcorn, this is so good, but sadly before the fight could continue, the door behind me slammed open as I saw a baby face looking Asian guy with, a long, rat tail… Oh its him, time to give him a piece of my wait why is he my dorm mate?!

“QUIET” the pale faced boy roared, on his face was now a pair of jade, metallic looking goggles, and as soon as he looked at the two magi his face grew a face of sheer disgust. “Ugh, just typical of their kind, arrogant and loud beyond measure. You two, cease this disturbance immediately, I am trying to work. “ he screamed in his childlike voice waving a large wrench at the two.

“Hey, angery baby man, shush.” Said angery baby man looked agasp and was about to say something before I said

“Oi, ya owe me an apology from earlier, what was your deal?” I demaded looking over my shoulder

“just my luck, of course I’m roomed with you of all people.” He rolled his eyes

“Me of all people?! Square up baby man, lets go!”

“First of all, I am not, a baby man. My name is Lin Su-Wang, and I am not fighting a munchkin.”

And this is how this went for like thirty minutes, four people either fighting or yelling at each other before, nothing, I really can’t remember what happened afterwards, only thing is I woke up with a pain in my neck for some reason. Weird, buuut yeah, this was one interesting first day.

Day one-completed! :)

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immortalghostkami · 4 years

Text

Like the Sun and the Moon

Chapter 5: A Mother’s Sorrow

Chapter Index

As the last rays of light finally disappeared behind the horizon, Makoto gave a quick prayer at the shrine, apologizing to the god for what was about to ensue.

Inosuke sat impatiently waiting, his irritation growing by the second. All he’s been doing since pairing up with Makoto was waiting and he was getting annoyed. He wanted to fight, not sit around!

“Hey! Kontomo! How much longer do I gotta-!” but he cut himself off as the sound of rippling water caught their ears.

Eyes darting to the shore, Makoto stood up, placing a hand on the hilt of her katana.

“Inosuke, remember what I told you during Final Selection?” she whispered, creeping over to him.

“Nope!” he grinned, anticipation building up in his veins.

“I can’t fight head-on, so I’m leaving this part to you,” she informed, before jumping off and disappearing into the shadows.

“That’s fine by me! You go and hide and I’ll show you why I’m the greatest!” he cackled, running towards the shore and swinging his blades.

Jumping out of the water, the demon landed behind Inosuke. Swinging her webbed claws, he easily dodged and sliced off her arms.

Watching her stumble back, Inosuke cackled at her pained yelp.

The demon was soaking wet with unruly long, black hair. It looked almost like kelp as it stuck to her slimy, bloated skin. Her kimono hung loosely on her frame, and what had once been a pale pink was now muddied and discolored, turning rotten shades of green, brown, and gray.

She reeked of lake water and decay, but there was also some kind of sweet, underlying iron smell that seemed to surround them as well. It was faint, so faint Inosuke was a little surprised he even noticed it, but the combination of it and the demon burned his nose.

“Ugh, you smell as gross as you look,” Inosuke gagged.

“I won’t let you…” she muttered, repeating it over and over again.

“I won’t let you separate me from any more of my children!” she stretched, revealing large whited out eyes and a mouth full of pin-like teeth.

Regrowing her arms in an instant, she charged at Inosuke once more, slashing and screeching. Her voice was loud and ear-piercing, causing Inosuke’s ears to ring.

“They’re mine! They’re mine! I won’t let you take them!” she screamed, causing Inosuke to flinch every time he got too close.

“They’re mine! I took them fair and square!” she screeched.

She was so loud Inosuke was starting to get a slight headache. Pushing himself off a tree, Inosuke flew straight at her.

“Beast Breathing, Sixth Fang: Palisade Bite!” he shouted, slicing off her arms.

Stumbling back, she was just barely able to dodge his attack. Getting her mouth sliced instead of her neck.

Panting heavily, the demon was starting to feel drowsy, making it hard to think straight. She was just fine a little while ago, so there was no way she could be this tired already!

That was when she smelt it. A delectable smell.

Before the demon could react, however, Inosuke flung at her once more. Still recovering from his previous attack, the demon’s kelp-like hair flew towards him. As if it had a will of its own, the clumps of slimy black hair reached for Inosuke in an attempt to tie him up. Overwhelming fear only filled her, however, as Inosuke easily cut through them, flying closer and closer.

“Nooo!” she shouted, his cackle ringing in her ears as she shielded her face with her arms.

Squeezing her eyes shut she could hear Inosuke shouting his attack when the sound of metal banging against something hard rang throughout the air.

Opening her eyes, the demon found an extremely large turtle-like creature blocking the attack with its shell.

The delicious smell from earlier was now gone too.

Landing between Inosuke and the demon. The turtle’s body was an amalgamation of human body parts. It had the head of a child whose face had started morphing into a turtle, and its neck and limbs were covered in thick scales. On its back, it wore an extremely large shell, the ridges looking like that of a baby’s face.

“What the-!” Inosuke cursed before the she-demon cried out.

“My baby!” she howled before multiple sharp pricks pierced her back.

Whipping around, the mother demon found multiple darts stuck in her, but not who shot them. While she pulled them out and threw them to the side, the turtle demon didn’t even realize it was also shot while it threw a punch at Inosuke. Despite its size, it was much faster than its mother.

As the fist grew closer, Inosuke felt a cold thin metal wrap around his torso that roughly pulled him back. Twisting his body into a backflip, the metal released him and allowed him to land safely.

“Sleep Breathing, Third Form Modified: Dream Catcher, Catch-and-Rescue!” Makoto breathed.

She was out of breath and dripping in a cold sweat. Where had that turtle come from? She was so focused on staying hidden while wafting the smell of her blood around the island that she hadn’t noticed it emerge from the lake.

Looking up, Inosuke found Makoto’s back to him with the hilt of her sword in her hands. He watched in awe as the 12 toothed metal wipe snapped back together with a flick of her wrist.

That’s when he noticed the cut on her forearm.

“I’m sorry Inosuke, are you alright?!” she shouted over her shoulder, eyes never leaving the pair in front of her.

Snapping out of his daze, Inosuke hollered, “I didn’t need your help!”

“And why are you bleeding?!” he demanded, charging back towards the two demons.

“You don’t have to concern yourself with that, we have to defeat these two!” Makoto responded, dodging the question while looking for the demon’s weaknesses.

“You didn’t answer my question!” Inosuke snapped before getting cut off by the turtle demon.

It lunged at them, aiming to crush the two demon slayers under its fists when they dodged.

Stumbling, the mother demon cursed, “You brat! What did you shoot at me?!”

She was starting to see double and the world seemed to spin. Each breath she took seemed to grow shorter and shorter, and gravity on land only grew heavier.

“The lake! I need to get back to the lake!” she panted, panic settling in her bones.

“You’re not going anywhere!” Inosuke declared, running towards her only to get intercepted by the turtle again.

Jumping back, Inosuke growled, “That stupid thing is annoying!”

Charging at it once more, his blades only violently rang out as they hit its back or arms.

“The stomach! Its weak point is its stomach!” Makoto shouted, readying her sword as she realized it was protecting its soft underbelly.

“I already know that!” Inosuke shouted, charging towards the demon once more.

Steeling her nerves, Makoto didn’t have time to overthink or hesitate. She knew what she was getting into when she decided to become a demon slayer, Sanemi warned her countless times.

Turning her sword to herself, the two demon’s snapped their heads to her. The smell of her blood drew their attention away from Inosuke.

Instantly, the strong smell of flowers flooded their noses. Lilac, Jasmine, Lavender, and Roses among the disgusting amount of scents. It was so strong, even Inosuke could vaguely smell the floral scent hidden under the iron of blood.

The mother demon was practically crawling at this point towards the lake as her child’s movements slowed. Bringing a hand up to cover its nose, the turtle demon let out a loud roar.

“Inosuke now!” Makoto cried, grabbing the hilt of her sword and running forward.

“Don’t tell me what to do!” he hollered.

“Beast Breathing, Second Fang: Rip and Tear!” he shouted, slicing the turtle's belly open.

“My baby!” the mother demon screeched, looking over her shoulder.

Landing on top of the turtle, Inosuke’s eyes were barely able to catch the blur that sped past him towards the remaining demon.

Reaching out for the now shrinking turtle, the demon’s eyes widened as she was suddenly surrounded in a soft, floral mist. In front of her, was herself. The image of who she was before becoming a demon. In her arms, she cradled the child she had lost many years ago.

“Yoshi…” she croaked, only to snap back reality.

“Sleep Breathing, Fourth Form: Sleep Paralysis,” Makoto whispered, slicing the demon’s neck in one, swift motion.

Rolling to soften her landing, Makoto stood up. Looking back as the mother demon’s body collapsed to the ground, her head didn’t fall far.

“Yoshi…!” she cried, tears pouring from her eyes.

“No, please! Please stop! You’ll kill ‘em!” she begged, trying to drag her body towards Inosuke and the tiny turtle.

“The hell ya yapping about?!” Inosuke snapped, realizing Makoto had played him.

She had planned this. She used those special smells of her to mess with the demons while Inosuke fought. While hiding, she pinpointed their weaknesses from their fight and planned accordingly. But the worst part?

He didn’t sense a single drop of bloodlust from her during their entire fight.

Following the demon's outstretched arm, Makoto turned to the crying turtle under Inosuke’s foot. The mother demon was desperately reaching for it, but the sleep darts Makoto had shot into her body had already taken effect.

Sheathing her sword, Makoto made her way over to Inosuke. Softly pushing him aside, she ignored his irritated comments and picked up the crying turtle. The two demons were already disintegrating when Makoto placed it into its mother’s arms.

Cradling it close, the mother demon cooed, “Shh, shh. It’s okay now, mommy’s got you.”

Despite turning to ash, the mother demon felt no pain as she held her little one close. Rubbing its head, she sang to it lovingly. Its cries softening until they were nothing more than whimpers and gurgles.

Watching the mother demon sing her baby to sleep, Inosuke couldn’t help but feel a strange sense of Deja Vu. The fuzzy memory of being held flashing into his mind. There was a gentle smile that sang something to him.

Kissing her baby one last time, the two’s bodies disappeared. The gentle breeze blowing specks of their ash away.

“It seems… like her baby was of her own creation…” Makoto whispered, her voice lost in her throat.

Controlling her breathing, she stopped the bleeding on her arm. Kneeling down, she simply watched the ash fly away.

Watching the mother demon so desperately cling to her baby reminded Makoto of painful memories. The image of her mother and younger siblings flashed into her mind, but it was nothing compared to that memory.

The most agonizing pain shot through her chest as she remembered everything that happened that night.

Swallowing harshly, Makoto’s throat burned and she was finding it hard to breathe. Gripping her haori sleeve tightly, it took everything she had to not break down right there.

Standing up, Makoto’s hoarse voice snapped Inosuke from his thoughts.

“They’re coming up now,” she forced herself to say, turning to the lake.

Following her gaze, Inosuke waited and watched as nothing happened. About to call her out for lying, he cut himself off as the bodies of seven to ten children slowly floated up from the lake’s debts. All under the age of ten, they were bloated and rotting, clearly drowned.

“I think she tied them down to the bottom of the lake with her hair, the demon I mean,” Makoto explained.

Refusing to turn and let Inosuke see the tears that threatened to spill, Makoto instead pulled out her sword. Flicking her wrist, she easily expanded the blade before turning her head slightly towards him.

“Inosuke, I’m sorry, but can you do me a favor?” she asked, voice softer than normal.

“Why should I?” he huffed, crossing his arms.

“Please?” she simply said, pausing before adding on, “I… don’t want their parents to see them like this.”

Thinking for a long second, Inosuke reluctantly caved in.

“Fine, but only because I’m just that awesome!” he proclaimed, freezing when Makoto finally turned to look at him.

“Thank you,” she smiled. It was sad but warm; genuine and full of gratitude.

Inosuke’s eyes widened behind his mask at the sight. The rising sun casting a halo behind her, and for a second, he thought something otherworldly was standing before him.

After barring the victims of the mother demon and her kimono, Inosuke and Makoto soon left the town. Walking side by side, he silently watched Makoto from behind his mask.

She seemed to be fine, acting the same as she before everything, but Inosuke now noticed a melancholic aura she seemed to have. He wondered if it was something that she had always had, or if he just now noticed it because of the demon they had slain.

Crossing his hands behind his head, Inosuke’s mind wandered back to the demon holding her baby and the memory that had flashed through his mind. He couldn’t help but ponder on where it had come from, and why he suddenly remembered it. If he really focused, he felt like he could almost hear the words that soft smile spoke.

Suddenly screaming, he startled Makoto as he gave up.

“That’s too much thinking!” he growled, frustrated.

“What is?” Makoto softly pried, tilting her head.

“Nothing!” he snapped, a puff of steam blowing out of the boar mask’s nose.

They were quiet after that, Inosuke busy grumbling under his breath. After a minute of this, Makoto took a deep breath before running in front of him. He merely gave her a confused grunt as she walked backward, hands behind her back.

“Inosuke, I wanted to thank you,” she started, only confusing the boy more.

Bringing her hands close to her chest, Makoto looked away ashamed, her cheeks tinting the slightest shade of pink.

“You see, despite being a swordsman, I’m not really good at confrontation. If it were just me up against that mother demon and her child, I’m not sure I would have survived,” she explained.

Looking back up at him, Inosuke felt his stomach flutter at Makoto’s smile. She had smiled at him before, but the way her lips pulled up and her eyes made little crinkles made him feel like he was air.

“Thank you for being there, I couldn’t have done it without you,” she laughed, causing the boy’s heart to skip a beat.

“Stop that!” he suddenly shouted, catching Makoto off guard.

“Huh?” she blinked confused.

“What’s with you! You’re so weird! Stop making me giddy!” he babbled, rushing past her.

Just like when they first met, Makoto was left behind not knowing what just happened. Staring at him surprised, she was only able to catch bits and pieces of what Inosuke was shouting about. Despite this, a tired, yet amused laugh slipped past her lips as she chased after him.

Next Chapter

Previous Chapter

#demon slayer #kimestu no yaiba #demon slayer fanfic #kimestsu no yaiba fanfic #oc x canon #oc/canon #Inosuke/oc #Inosuke x oc #fluff #angst #slow burn #Like the Sun and the Moon #manga spoilers

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bookenders · 5 years

Text

Cutting Down the House

I talk with a lot of novelists, and when I mention I’m a short story writer, most, if not all of them, say the same thing:

“I don’t know how you can write something so short! That takes real skill.”

Like, sure. But long form is, in my opinion, a lot harder. How you can write something so LONG? How do you fill all that space? Where do you find all those words??

But I’m not here to fawn over novelists (again). I’m here to help y’all figure out how to cut, green, trim, and slim down your prose. I’m talking short stories, flash fiction, micro fiction, and other short stacks.

(I have an obvious bias for short stories because that’s what I do the most.)

Here’s How I Write Short Fiction:

[Under the cut, because long post is looong.]

Let’s Begin

What kind of stories are short stories?

Shorts are somewhere between 1,000-10,000 words on average, less than that is Flash. You’ll see a lot of disagreement on how long a short story can be, but I recommend capping it around 10,000. [NOTE: Most literary magazines only accept less than 10,000/8,000/5,000 word stories. It varies.]

I usually put the short story cap at around 20 pages because one time someone turned in a 30+ page story in a workshop out of spite and everyone was very salty about it.

In a more vague sense, any story can be a short story. It’s all about how you tell it. I mean, I’d pay good money to see someone shorten The Epic of Gilgamesh into a short story and make it good, but you get what I’m saying. I’ve read fairy tales, war stories, romances, holiday fluff, deadbeat father stories, midlife crisis tales, murders, you name it. If you can think it, you can do it.

The trick of the trade lies in -

Construction

How do you structure a short story?

You don’t have a lot of space, so, like poetry, you gotta make it count.

[Actually, I recommend trying out writing some poetry, or using it as a warm-up of some kind. Learn some poetic devices because that stuff is crazy helpful. I’m constantly thanking my English teachers and that one poetry class I took for teaching me how to be succinct.]

You don’t have the time to expand everything like you might in a novel. So you gotta whittle down your plot to a few basic steps. Just like an essay. (Eugh.)

I think of short stories as mini arcs. If you are a long form guru, try to think of a short like a single scene. If you’re doing scenes right, that means that each one has its own arc. Beginning, middle, end, emotional change, ending on a positive, negative, or neutral as long as it’s different from where it starts, the works. But a whole lot more localized and focused.

In my mind, a mini arc goes like this (and keep in mind, my stories are usually single location, limited cast, dialogue light, and interiority heavy):

The protagonist is in a place (physical and/or emotional) that can be changed and will change. This is your opening paragraph(s) / first page (if you’re writing a longer story, or your structure is a slow start for pacing). Start answering questions: who are they, what do they want, why can’t they get it?

Inciting incident occurs. This, ideally, happens in the first or second paragraph, no later than the end of the first page. Or before the story and is mentioned as early as possible. In short: it should happen early. A skilled writer can even throw it in the first sentence.

Rising action is as tight as you can get it. It’s more of an approach than a rise, in my opinion. Everything in this part, or these small scenes, leads to the climax and closing - we’re learning about the character(s) and their world, learning what makes them tick and how they think and how the story leads them where they need to go. In my stories, this is the longest part.

The climax point is typically closer to the end than the beginning. Sometimes it’s the last page, last paragraph, or, my personal favorite, the last sentence.

The falling action/denouement is, in my opinion, optional. If the climax happens right at the end of the story, you don’t have much room for it, maybe a sentence or two to close it. Otherwise, this is where you tie a bow around your theme(s) and exit on a mic drop.

While you’re planning your arc, keep an eye out for connective tissue, or threads. If you bring back a detail you mention early on when you’re writing the end, it’ll look like you knew what you were doing the entire time.

The fancy term for this kind of thing is rhyming action. Charles Baxter has a fantastic essay about it (I’ll link to it in the reblog). I highly recommend reading it. Here’s an excerpt that hits the point home:

“...the man... is suddenly struck with what we sometimes call déjà vu, which is only an eerie sense of some repetition, of a time spiral, of things having come around back to themselves... The effect is a bit like prophecy, except prophecy run in reverse, so that it cannot be used for purposes of worldly advancement. Prophecy run forward gives the prophet the power of forecasting and a habit of denunciation. Prophecy run backward, into rhyming action or déjà vu, gives the participant a power of understanding.”

It’s one of my favorite tricks, and once you learn it, you’ll start to see it everywhere. It’s the equivalent of a 3-part thesis statement for writers: optional, but a good structural tool to keep around.

Keeping it SS

Short Stories are Short and Sweet.

It’s all about finding a way to say what you want to say in as few words as possible. Show vs tell guidelines come in handy here, but you have to use some good judgment and decide the right moments to show and the right moments to tell.

Think about campfire stories. If they’re describing a car, they probably won’t mention any details unless they’re relevant to the plot or message. Do we care if the car is blue? No, unless the color reminds the protagonist of their ex’s nail polish, or something, and that reminder impacts the story in a significant way.

(Details are like dialogue. They advance the plot, reveal character, and/or provide a complication.)

I once read a character description that went like this: “He was the kind of man to never use two words when one would do.”

Be that man. Get the point across swiftly and succinctly. But also know when to draw a moment out. It’s a lot of back-and-forth with shorts. And, as always, it depends.

Remember: Like snakes, stories have a beginning, middle, and end. Some are tiny, some are a little bit longer. Sometimes they look cyclical. Keep your SS SS. (Get it? Ssss, like hissing? Snakes? 🐍)

What If I Need to Shorten What I Already Have?

There’s a technique called greening that you should reserve until your final draft. Basically, it’s taking out every single word that can be removed without losing any of the meaning. This includes frankensteining sentences together, removing extraneous modifiers, and leaving out that detail you like but has zero impact on anything relevant. It’s hard, it’s very hard, but it’s an amazing skill to have.

There’s a great New Yorker article about it, which I will also link to in the reblog.

Have any specific short story questions?

Shoot me an ask! I’ll do my best to help you out! I write lots of short stories and used to be the fiction editor for a literary magazine, so I’ve got all that juicy editor know-how.

Questions? Ask ‘em! Comments? Make ‘em!

For more writing advice and observations, check out my advice tag.

Like my advice and other writing nonsense? Check out the link to my Ko-Fi in my description!

#writeblr #writing #amwriting #creative writing #writing advice #fiction #short story #short stories #appendix #brainbox #prose #greening #flash fiction #micro fiction #short form #structure #story structure #short fiction

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nadziejastar · 5 years

Note

I think a big obstacle that I don't see acknowledged to Lea and Isa becoming romantically involved is that Japanese culture is even more conservative regarding LGBT issues than Western culture is. SE has only had a few LGBT characters in their entire history, and they're all relatively minor. I hope that Isa and Lea can break the mold and I think that them being both supporting characters and adults makes it more likely, but I'm not getting my hopes up.

I definitely don’t have my hopes up either. I think KH3 did everything it could to intentionally eliminate all the intimacy between Lea and Isa. Skuld seemed to be thrown into the mix for that purpose. Even if they hadn’t sabotaged it in KH3, I still think the relationship would have been more implied that outright stated. Because like you said, Japan is even more conservative than the West regarding such depictions. I can compare the situation with Lea and Isa to a few other pairings and how they were handled.

There’s Yosuke and the main character (Yu) from Persona 4. Yosuke was going to be a romance option. Voiced dialogue still exists in the files (including dubbed!), but the option was completely removed by the time of release. The fact that even a more niche series (well, at the time) like Persona felt too afraid to put an optional romance between two guys in, shows how taboo this topic is, especially in Japan. And KH3 was much higher profile and had a much bigger budget than P4. So, it was not that surprising to me to see how Lea and Isa got treated. It was like déjà vu. Doesn’t make me less annoyed by it, though.

I also think they heavily altered Yosuke’s personality in the final game to cover up any suggestion of same-sex attraction. In the final game he mostly acts like a frat boy stereotype. Constantly hitting on any girl, and making sexist and homophobic remarks. They were really overcompensating. It was very annoying actually. And it only made him seem more closeted. In his Social Link, the dialogue was incredibly well-written and I loved his personality. This pairing was handled so similarly to Lea and Isa. Here’s why I think so:

Yosuke: Oh yeah, I’m Yosuke Hanamura! I’m his friend. His partner, y'know.

Marie: …Partner? You mean like a close friend?

Yosuke: Heheh, that about sums it up. Er, what’s your name?

They’re very close. Yosuke constantly refers to himself as Yu’s “partner”.

Yosuke: I haven’t changed addresses since before we moved to Inaba. I mean, I might get a text from someone. …It’s hard to call, y'know? If I called people just to tell them my number changed, they’d get annoyed. And some of them never planned to text me anyway…Oh but hey, don’t look at me like I don’t have any friends! ……Though to tell you the truth, I don’t remember what we all used to talk about. Can’t really call ‘em friends…

He did not feel close to any of his old friends.

Yosuke: It’s only with you guys that I talk seriously like this. I dunno why, but I feel like I don’t have to lie…Especially with you. You’ve already seen the worst of me and all. But well… thinking about it now, if someone had to see that, I’m glad it was you.

He opens up to you in a way he doesn’t with anyone else.

Yosuke: So, you ever invited a girl in here?

“I haven’t.”

Yosuke: Haha, maybe you’re more of a man’s man than I thought.

> Yosuke seems happy…

He’s happy that you are a “man’s man”.

“I will soon.”

Yosuke: Seriously!? That mean you’re working on someone!?

> Yosuke is keyed up…

He gets anxious if you say you’re bringing a girl over.

Yosuke: M-Man, kids sure are mature these days…Well, my first love was in first grade, too! I’ve always been ahead of my time. But, well… I don’t really need that in my life right now. It’s just not the time…I have something I need to do before that can happen…

He said that he was not interested in dating right now. He’s working on sorting out his feelings, since the girl he liked before was murdered. Yet in the rest of the game, they have him constantly hit on every girl and act desperate to get a girlfriend. It was so weird. It felt like deflection, in the same way Skuld was with Lea and Isa.

Yosuke: When the murders started, I got excited…I thought there was finally a point to me being in Inaba…I thought I could forget Senpai was gone… and the fact that I was such a loser…I jumped at the murders and never once thought about what I was doing…I… didn’t even take the first step…I’m sorry…Saki-senpai. I’m sorry… Yu.

He starts crying after opening up to you. There’s an option to hug him. Around the waist too. He says it’s for girls, but still accepts it. That was what he needed. You are the one who helps him sort out his feelings.

Yosuke: This town I hated so much? Now, I love it. There’s still nothing here, but I have family and friends… and you. The important things are never far off… They’re all around you.

He mentions family and friends, hesitates, then mentions you separately. Does that mean you’re more special to him than a friend?

I just did what I thought was the best thing at the time. For Roxas, for Xion, for the Organization—and for Isa. But most of all for me.

It reminded me of this. Axel mentions everyone else, hesitates, then mentions Isa separately. Not Saïx, Isa. Was Isa special to him?

Yosuke: I always wanted to be “special.” I thought my life’d finally have meaning if I was “special” to someone. That’s why I was really excited when got my Persona. But I really didn’t need it… It’s not what you have or what you can do…Just being born, living your life… Before you know it, you’re already special to someone.

“You’re right.”

Yosuke: Yeah… Like you… You’re special to me, you know?

Yep. Yosuke wants to be special to someone, and he says you’re special to him.

“That’s not true.”

Yosuke: You just don’t realize it yet. You’re already special… to Chie, Yukiko… and me.

When Yosuke said “special” it stood out to me. This was before I found out that the romance option was taken out. I don’t pick up romantic vibes between male characters that often. I don’t wear shipping goggles. Their relationship simply seemed romantic to me. “Special” is not a word guys will use with each other very often.

Because it is very intimate. If the writers have a character say that another character is “special” to them, it almost always will seem romantic. Especially between two guys. And I did get those vibes. When I found out he was supposed to be a romance option, I wasn’t surprised. So, after all this intimate bonding, how does their arc end?

Yosuke: I didn’t realize it…When I called you “special,” I thought some more about it. I think of everyone, I wanted to be acknowledged by you the most…So…I want you to hit me! Give me a good one. Knock out all this crap inside of me. I want to be equal with you. I want us to stand shoulder-to-shoulder. So c'mon…

By…getting in a fist fight? Two guys were getting just a bit too close and intimate with each other. Yosuke used a taboo word. “Special”. Now he has to be beaten up for it. Otherwise it’s just too GAY, ya know? And that’s NOT okay. The message is if a guy is too intimate with another guy, he needs to “man up” and get some sense knocked into him. Sad, really. In the deleted dialogue, there was a romantic confession. Yosuke says he likes you. The Japanese word for “like” is the one specifically used romantically. To me this is the ultimate display of the writers chickening out.

And that’s how Lea and Isa’s arc felt to me, too. There was all of this dialogue suggesting there was something very intimate and special between them. Then in KH3, we get a girl shoehorned in out of nowhere. Apparently Saïx was doing “everything for” her, despite having zero emotional capacity. And Lea also wants to “clobber” Isa now, not free his heart. It felt so contrived in order to create emotional distance between them, so any hints of romance would be gone, gone, gone. It felt like the writers were panicking and going “No Homo!” They were so desperate that they wouldn’t even let the real Isa get saved from being a vessel. That’s how afraid they were of Lea and Isa’s natural chemistry and special intimacy together. Pathetic.

Then there’s Ike and Soren from the Fire Emblem series. Lea and Isa reminded me of them. You have the more confident, “masculine” one in Ike and Lea. And then you have the calm, quiet, “feminine” one in Soren and Isa. They have a hard time opening up to anyone else. I think Isa even kinda looks like Soren. They both have that penetrating stare, indicating high intelligence. And they have soft, delicate features, indicating vulnerability underneath the surface.

They both act cold outwardly, but Soren is described as a very empathetic young man. And I think Isa was, too. I love this ship. I think this is the direction they were originally trying to take Lea and Isa’s relationship. This pairing is HEAVILY implied by the story. But it’s never made explicit. Why do I think it’s romantic?

Soren: Curse you! Why won’t you let it go?! I have no one to rely on but you! If I tell you and you turn on me… I… I… I could no longer live.

Ike: That’s why you have to tell me, Soren. You wouldn’t open your heart to anyone else. So if I didn’t so something about it, you’d probably be in pain forever.

Soren is totally emotionally dependent on Ike. And Ike is tender and soft with him in a way he isn’t with anybody else. There’s just a level of trust and intimacy that is unique to them.

Soren: When the sage died, no one would help me. I couldn’t speak. Couldn’t find food. I was dying. You were the only one who helped. You and your father. That’s why you’re my friend. My…only friend.

This is the localized text. Even in the first game, the they tried to remove any romantic intimations. They added a reference to Ike’s dad for no reason. And plenty of people still choose to see Soren and Ike as just friends. I think it’s more than obvious the writers intended for them to be more than that. But many people don’t want to see it. And it was kept ambiguous for that very reason.

Soren: When the sage died, no one would help me. I couldn’t speak. Couldn’t find food. I was dying. Only you held your hand out to me. That’s why…only you are special to me…

This is a translation of the original Japanese dialogue. There’s that word again. “Special”. This word cannot be overstated. It conveys a VERY different message than “friend”. That’s why they thought it needed to be changed.

Soren: “There’s only one place for me to be, Ike… and it’s by your side.”

Soren is described as “the boy always at Ike’s side” by other characters. The story demonstrates again and again that they are inseparable. If Ike and Soren achieve A-level support, there is a paired ending. Ike has this with no female character, and Soren has this with no other character.

Axel: I think you can be inseparable even if you’re apart. It’s like, if you feel really close to each other. Like best friends.

Lea and Isa were inseparable, too.

Ike: Listen, lady. This is a shop, and I’m a customer. What’s so sweet about that?

Aimee: Oh, such cold words… My hero plays hard to get! You’re only making me more interested.

Ike: Will you let go of my hand? Please?

There’s a running joke about Ike avoiding a persistent female admirer that Soren has to save him from.

Gatrie: Not those flowers… THOSE flowers!

Ike: …Gatrie, we’re inside. There’s nothing here but the temple handmaidens.

Gatrie: Exactly! It’s like a whole new species of girl lives in Begnion! Everyone in this palace is drop-dead gorgeous!

Ike: …

Gatrie: You know what I mean, Ike? Tee hee! Say, which one strikes your fancy? That buxom lass with the chestnut hair is… Hey, Ike? Ike?

He has no interest in admiring pretty women.

“Hey, Redhead over there!” Axel turned at the sound of the voice, scratching his head.

“What, Larxene. I’m Axel. Got it memorised?”

“I can’t just remember over ten names all of a sudden, can I?”

“Yeah, I guess not.” Axel watched as Larxene ran up to him.

“How is it? Does the coat suit me?” Larxene did a twirl in front of him. The coat always changed to fit the wearer. It was a perfect tight fit, as expected.

“It’s fine, I guess.”

This feels like it was put in for the same reason Ike’s scenes were. Sure, Aimee is clingy and obsessive. And Larxene is a bitch. It doesn’t prove they’re disinterested in women or that they’re in love with their best friend. But in addition to everything else, it presents a strong argument. Axel isn’t interested in admiring pretty women.

Soren—An officer in the Greil Mercenaries. A cool-headed realist who has deep trust in Ike, but will rarely open up to any other beorc or laguz.

Isa—A quiet and cool-headed youth. Though he does come out of his shell when talking to his best friend Lea, toward others he is distant and untalkative.

Like Soren, Isa is described in terms of his relationship to Lea. He only comes out of his shell for him. There’s a level of intensity to their friendship that is unique. I am sure Isa was dependent on Lea emotionally, like Soren was with Ike.

Soren: Ike? Ike! This can’t… It can’t… What am I… If you’re not here, what am I to do?

If Ike dies in the first game, Soren has a special reaction.

Soren: “Ike… Please live… Even if all the cities burn, and the seas swallow Tellius… You mustn’t die… Not you…”

And another in the second game. He cannot bear to lose Ike. Sounds like some Shakespearean sonnet, too. That just doesn’t sound like something you’d say about someone unless you were in love with them.

Micaiah: Your heart is frozen, but I feel a warm core trying to melt through that ice. I see… You have someone you cherish very much. Someone you rely on.

Soren: Do not presume to understand me, you ridiculous girl. You have no idea who I am and what I can do. None at all.

His heart was frozen, but Ike was able to melt through the ice. Soren cherishes him and relies on him. He doesn’t appreciate hearing it from others, because Ike is his weakness. Soren’s entire character arc revolved around Ike.

Saïx:Do you know what happens to those who lose their true purpose? Inevitably, they destroy themselves.

Much like how Saïx says he lost his true purpose as soon as Axel left Organization XIII.

Ike: Soren, don’t cry.

Soren: Cry…? I’m … crying?

Ike: You’re so smart, and yet you’re completely hopeless at normal stuff. Look, come here.

Soren: P-please don’t treat me like a child. I’m not that…

Ike: Come on.

Soren: …

Ike: Sheesh, you’re such a pain. I’ll come over there.

Soren: [breaks out crying]

Another scene that involves hugging a crying person. A very intimate act. Soren opens up about his dark past. He pushes Ike away when he tries to hug him, saying not to treat him like a child. But he accepts it, too. It’s exactly what he needed and wanted. This scene is referred to in the official fan book as “the moment where their two hearts become one”. I think a scene like this is what they were absolutely terrified of happening in KH3.

Axel: Hey, I’m not about to tell you ALL my dark secrets. Got it memorized?

It all comes down to the degree of intimacy. Axel doesn’t express his deepest feelings to Roxas, Xion, or anyone else. And he doesn’t want to. He’s more than happy to avoid heavy issues like his past. He’d prefer to keep things light and fun, just enjoying their company.

Axel: As long as we remember each other, we’ll never be apart.

Roxas: Ha ha, wow, Axel. That sounded ridiculous.

Axel: What? I thought it was pretty deep.

When Axel made his comment, the other two thought it was awkward. Roxas laughs and says he sounded he sounded ridiculous.

Xion: Don’t worry, Axel–we got your hokey speech memorized.

Axel: Just checking.

And Xion said his remark was hokey. And I don’t think either of them were out of line with their comments. I completely understand why they teased him. It was because his statement contained a lot of intimacy. It sounded like something you’d say to, well…a lover. To them Axel’s remark came out of nowhere. And it kind of did. Because for the most part, his comment wasn’t really directed at them. Sure, he never wants to forget them. But he had someone else on his mind before he said it. He only spoke his thoughts out loud to cheer them up. But even they could recognize that the comment didn’t feel appropriate for them.

Day 118: You Changed, Not Me

Talking to Roxas and Xion always brings back memories of my human life, back when I was a kid. It’s a weird sensation. I ought to be able to share all this with Saïx, but I just don’t feel like it anymore. It’s strange, but I’m content with just missing what’s gone. I’m not the one who changed. You did.

Roxas and Xion remind him of his past. But unlike with them, Axel DOES want to share his memories with Saïx. Badly. He wants to connect emotionally with him. But Saïx has no interest in having an emotional relationship. Because of this, interacting with him is incredibly painful for Axel. So painful that he’s more content with just missing what’s gone rather than subjecting himself to continual rejection. Saïx is the only character Axel acts like this towards.

Axel: So you don’t need a heart to have something that you can’t bear to lose then. If that’s true, then I guess the closest thing that we Nobodies have would be memories of our past. It’s the memories that create the things that we don’t want to lose.

Even though Saïx rejects him, Axel is always careful not to open up to anyone else about his past. He never does, even in KH3. And yet, memories of his past were the one thing he felt like he couldn’t bear to lose. The same memories that he longed to share with Saïx. Axel desires intimacy with Saïx and nobody else. He can’t bear to lose his memories of the past—of Isa.

Axel: Love is what happens if there’s something really special between two people.

Roxas: You mean, like, if they’re best friends? Inseparable?

Axel: Well, you can care about your friends, I guess, but that’s not what I’m talking about.

There’s that word again. “Special”. And again, it conveys a VERY different message than “friend”. It’s a very taboo word when used by men towards other men. If men can’t be special to each other in a video game about hearts, light, friendship, magic, love, and Disney Princesses, then they’re pretty much out of luck I guess.

#anti-kh3 #kh axel #kh lea #kh saïx #kh isalea #leaisa #akusai #kingdom hearts meta

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crystalninjaphoenix · 5 years

Text

Resurgence

A Jacksepticeye Fanfiction

Part Thirteen: Upside Down

First Part | Previous | Next

Summary: Where did Jackie go? None of the others are sure, but they know who’s behind it. Jackie himself is lost in a strange sort of world, but he’s surprised by what he finds in there.

Chase woke up with his heart beating unusually fast, covered in sweat. For a moment, the image of a red hallway lingers in his mind, a bright green light piercing the darkness...but then it fades. It must have been a nightmare. Weird. He looks over at the clock. It was almost two a.m., jeez, why was he up? Guess it was the nightmare. He’s about to fall asleep again when he hears somebody yelling downstairs.

No, that was probably fine, JJ had stayed the night...and then Chase bolted upright. No, that couldn’t be an explanation for why there was shouting downstairs. How the hell had he forgotten? And who was in his house, then? Chase flung the covers away, pulling open his nightstand drawer and taking out his gun. It was unloaded, but it could work as a threat. He ran down the hall—having the strangest feeling of deja vu—to the stairs. Taking the steps two at a time, he followed the sound of the voice into the living room.

“—and if Jackie’s dead I swear I’m going to kill him!”

For a split second, Chase doesn’t recognize the people in the room. Then he wonders why he didn’t. There’s JJ, sitting on the couch still wearing his day clothes, probably having not slept at all. And there’s Marvin, wearing his mask and cape, frantically pacing along one wall. Chase watches as he pulls out his wand and taps the front door’s knob, causing it to glow green for a moment.

“Wh—Marv, what are you doing here?!” Chase asked, lowering his empty gun.

Marvin spun around. “I’m freaking the fuck out, Chase! That’s what I’m doing!”

“Yeah, I can see that but why?”

“Because I saw him!” Marvin was shaking a bit. “Jackie and Sam found me, and there was that detective, and then he showed up in the phone, and-and we decided to split up, which was probably a bad idea but he wasn’t going to take no for an answer, and th-then he followed me, I could hear him there was static everywhere and-and-and—” he cut off, breathing rapidly, almost hyperventilating.

JJ stood up and walked over to Marvin. I think you need to sit down, my good man. Marvin didn’t protest as JJ guided him over to the couch and sat him down on it. Chase stuffed the empty gun into the waistband of his pajama pants, then walked over to stand next to JJ.

Now, we can’t help if you keep running around like a lunatic and won’t give us the whole story, JJ signed. So if you would please start at the beginning.

Marvin nodded, very deliberately taking deep breaths. Once he calmed down enough, he told Chase and JJ all about how he’d been in the north part of the city when Sam had led Jackie right to him. He explained about the conversation they had about pocket dimensions and how they’d found Detective Akela eavesdropping on them, recording every word. Marvin had tried to delete the video, only to find out that he had tracked them down. Jackie had insisted they go different ways, and Marvin acquiesced.

“Wait, you let him go out on his own?!” Chase gaped. “You do realize that’s exactly what you’re not supposed to do, right?”

“Of course I fucking know!” Marvin yelled. “But you didn’t see the look on his face! He would’ve run away from me if he had to! He was just so...so determined.”

What happened next? JJ prompted gently.

“Well, I ran, of course. I-I didn’t want to leave him, but I did. And I had to run because I could hear him following me. He—he was in my-my head, s-saying things that—that—and I looked behind me and I s-saw him—” Marvin swallowed. “Like-like a man made out of three-dimensional white noise. Distortion. He was everywhere at once and his eye was glowing and I-I—I—” He cut off.

That description sounded oddly familiar to Chase. But why would it? He’d never seen Anti before. “And you think he followed you here?” Chase asked.

“He must have!” Marvin was shaking again. “Why would he stop? I tri-tried to ward your doors, but I don’t know if that will work.”

It will. The signs were firm, matching the expression on JJ’s face. Marvin, you are the most talented and GOOD magician I have ever met. I know he must have said things to you that would strike hard, but you must realize he lies. He just wants you to break down so he can get into your head.

“I know...” Marvin sounds like he’s trying to convince himself. “No, I know that. It’s just...hard to ignore those thoughts.”

Chase winced. Damn, if that wasn’t something he could relate to. “Well, then, we’re gonna drown them out. Marvin, whatever he said is absolutely not true. He’s a bitch and you’re gonna not give him the satisfaction.”

Marvin removed his mask and put his head in his hands. He took several deep breaths. JJ sat down next to him and put his hand on his back, rubbing comforting circles. After a moment of this, Marvin looks up again. “Okay. Okay, you’re right. You are. But now what are we supposed to do?”

“I think we just hold out,” Chase said, glancing toward the front door. “Wait and see if he really followed you here. See if Jackie shows up too. I should...go find some of the clips for this gun. Keep ‘em in a different part of the house.”

“Good. You shouldn’t even have that in the first place, it’s illegal.” That last part was said half-heartedly. Marvin relaxed, leaning back in the sofa.

JJ smiled. Well, while we’re waiting, should I make some tea?

Marvin laughed. “Only you would want to make tea at a time like this. But, yeah, if you’re offering, that would be appreciated.”

JJ patted Marvin on the shoulder before standing up and hurrying to the kitchen. Chase hesitated before turning around and heading back upstairs, looking for the storage closet where he kept the bullets for his gun. A week of no activity at all, of being worried about Bobby and Trevor wherever they were and wondering what Marvin was doing, and now the glitch just decides to show up again? What was he planning? And why just take a break in the middle of it when they’d had enough trouble dealing with all the shit he caused in just two days? He could have easily swooped in and fucked their lives up, but instead...what?

Chase arrived back downstairs with his gun actually loaded. Marvin was curled up at one end of the sofa, staring resolutely at the door and holding his wand in one hand. Chase had never seen him so tense. “It’s gonna be fine, bro,” he reassured him. “I think you outran him.”

Marvin didn’t look away from the door. “I doubt it. He’s not human, he wouldn’t get exhausted. And why would he give up?”

“I don’t know. Why would he take over Jack’s coma? Why would he take my...?” Chase trails off for a second, losing his train of thought. He blinked a few times and got back on track. “We don’t know how his mind works. Maybe he just wanted to fuck with you.”

Marvin laughed bitterly. “Maybe. Just show up and mess with my head, separate me from Jackie who I haven’t seen in an entire week—” he broke off. His eyes widened. “Wait...what if—Jackie!” He shot to hit feet. “I gotta—no, fuck, Jackie!—I—”

“Whoa, dude!” Chase immediately grabbed Marvin by the shoulders. “Calm down! What’s the problem?”

“He-he might’ve stopped following me to go after Jackie!” Marvin was panicking. “I knew I shouldn’t’ve left him! Fuck, dude, I have to—”

A loud knocking. Marvin and Chase jumped in unison to see JJ standing in the doorway to the kitchen, having just knocked on the doorframe for attention. You’ll be no good to anyone rushing off in a tizzy, he signed. There are a million more rational things to do about this. Calm down and think about it. He waited for a moment, staring down Chase and Marvin, making sure they weren’t about to rush out the door. Then he gestured behind him. The tea is ready, if you’d still care for it.

Chase and Marvin glanced at each other. They hadn’t seen JJ this assertive in a long time. It was a little jarring, but somehow welcome. So they followed him into the kitchen and sat at the table while JJ poured the tea into cups for them.

“Okay, so.” Chase’s fingers drummed an anxious rhythm on the table surface. “We obviously need to check on Jackie. But he doesn’t take his phone on patrol with him, and when he does it’s turned completely off.”

“Why the fuck does he do that?” Marvin muttered.

Chase shrugged. “Apparently the noise got in in trouble one time. Even the vibration. But anyway, we can’t call him.”

JJ then makes two signs. The one for phone, which looked like one of those fake telephones children make with their hands, and then one neither of the others had ever seen before. It looked like a combination of two: first tapping his left wrist with two of his fingers like he was taking a pulse, then linking his two pinkies together.

“What was that?” Marvin asked. “Doctor...then that second one is ‘S’ right?” His eyes widen. “Wait, did you give Schneep a name sign? When did you do that?”

JJ nodded. I don’t see why I shouldn’t. We are...going to be close, after all.

Wait, didn’t Schneep not like JJ? No, they made up. Chase and Jackie locked them in a room together until they did. Chase shook himself internally. How could he forget that? “Well anyway, you sayin’ we should call him?”

He is staying with Jackie, JJ pointed out. If Jackie has come home, Schneep would know.

“But...he’s electronic and shit,” Chase said. “Wouldn’t he know if we call Doc? Could he mess with the call? Make a fake one?”

“Possibly, but I think we should try. Better than waiting.” Marvin digs deep into his pocket and pulls out a phone, then dials a number.

Chase raises an eyebrow. “New phone?”

“Yeah. Didn’t want the police or, y’know, him, tracking me.” The other line rings for a while before someone on the other side picks up. “Hey, Schneep? It’s Marvin.” This prompts a string of yelling so loud even Chase and JJ can hear it through the phone. “Schneep, calm down, I—yeah, I know—no, shut up, just listen. First things first, I have a question for you. Do you remember when we first met? What was the first thing you said to me? Yes, this is important.”

Chase gives Marvin an odd look, but Marvin just waves him down, listening to the other side. JJ signs, He’s asking a question only the doctor would know the answer to. Just to check if it’s really him. Great idea!

Schneep must’ve given the right answer, because Marvin relaxed. “Okay. Cool. Just making sure. Now, uh, is Jackie home?” A pause. Then Marvin’s eyes widened and he started tapping the table nervously. “You’re sure? Maybe he just came home without you noticing. Can you check?” The next pause seemed to last an hour. Then Marvin made a strange sort of squeak sound. He forced himself to sound calm. “Okay, thank’s for checking. No, it’s fine. You can go back to sleep now. No, seriously, it’s fine. I just wanted to talk to him, but if he’s still out on patrol I can wait. Yes, everything’s fine. Thanks, bye.” He hung up the phone, took a shaky breath, then looked at Chase and JJ. “He’s not there.”

Chase feels a jolt of panic. “B-but that doesn’t mean he got to him? Right? Does it?”

JJ looks grave. I am...afraid. There’s a chance, but...the odds aren’t in Jackie’s favor.

Marvin shuddered. “Fuck. Fuck, dude. We need to—well, we need to check on Schneep, he was starting to freak out on his end—but then we need to look for Jackie...just to make sure.”

“But...” Chase almost didn’t want to mention it, but it needed to be said. “Marv...if he took him, wouldn’t Jackie be in that-that pocket dimension place you mentioned?”

Marvin paled. “Yeah. But I...I don’t know how to access those yet. I—I need to practice. So we’ll start by checking the city.”

If we’re going to check on the doctor, then we’d better do it sooner than later. JJ stood up. Never mind the tea, I’ll clean up while Chase gets ready to go.

“James, how are you so...calm?” Chase asked. “I thought you’d be freaking out.”

Jameson looked at him. There was an unusual, hard light in his eyes. That bastard can have my dreams, but he won’t have the rest of me. I won’t give him the pleasure. And he will not take my friends either. He closed his eyes and took a deep, steadying breath. Now, let’s go check on the good doctor.

Jackie opened his eyes, even though he couldn’t remember closing them. He was in the same spot he was before, kneeling on the sidewalk, holding Sam in his hands. But then he looked up. He didn’t see the night sky. He saw a vast expanse of red, no stars, no moon, no sun.

Slowly, he looked around. It was the city. He was still in the northern part, but...it was different. Other than the blood-red sky, that is. The street lamps were gone, and all the buildings were black—still made out of the same materials, stone and wood and steel, but now everything was dark as a void. The glass of the windows were solid white, no longer transparent. He looked toward the center of the city, where the tallest buildings were, and saw their black shapes rising into the sky. There was a constant, low-level hum that he couldn’t ignore. The air tasted metallic, snappy, electric.

“Sam?” Jackie looked down at the little eye. They were still unresponsive, barely glowing. But when he held them close to him, the glow increased the tiniest bit. “Hang in there, buddy.” He stood up, carefully making sure not to drop them. “I’m—I’m gonna get you out of here.” He didn’t know where to go, but he started walking anyway.

The ground didn’t feel solid. Every time he took a step, it felt like it shifted a little beneath his boots, like he was walking on gravel instead of plain gray concrete. There was light coming from...somewhere. Maybe the sky. Or the windows. There was no way to tell.

Suddenly, one of the buildings in the distance broke. There was no better way to describe it. One moment it was normal, the next moment the top half of it was sideways. It spazzed out, copies of the building jutting out at different angles, the white windows flickering in and out of existence. It looked like...like a video game glitch. Then the glitch spread, the buildings next to it copying, frantically malfunctioning, bugging. The wave of glitching buildings moved outward, coming right toward Jackie.

“Shit!” Jackie broke into a run. He didn’t care which direction he was heading, he just knew he couldn’t get caught up in the glitch wave. It was gaining speed, coming closer and closer to him, and as it approached the hum grew louder, into an ear-piercing whine. The ground was like sand, and he was running uphill. Every step took too much effort for how little he was moving. He glanced behind him, and the glitch wave was upon him, screeching in his ears. He ducked his head, hugging Sam to his chest. The glitches were around him, he was caught in their wild crashing and screaming. The ground gave up its hold on his boots. He felt like he was being tossed too and fro like a pinball in a pinball machine at the hands of a master. All he could do was curl around Sam and hope they’d both make it out okay.

He slammed into something hard with a painful smack. The glitches subsided. He was laying on the sidewalk—no, now he’s standing up, having not moved at all. How...actually it was probably better to not think about it. Jackie made sure that Sam was still safe, then gathered his bearings, observing his surroundings. It looked like he was in the dark version of the city park, with black, twisted trees and black soil underfoot that felt more solid than the sidewalk had. This was all the way across the city. Exactly what had that glitch wave done?

“This is gonna be harder than I thought, Sam,” Jackie muttered. He didn’t know if the eye could hear him, but it made him feel better to talk. “I guess we’ve just gotta improvise, then.” He started walking once again. Once he reached one of the park paths, he walked alongside it. He was pretty sure that it would be about as reliable as the sidewalk had been, with its not-entirely-there feeling.

He reached the park’s playground. It did not look like it had been made for children. The slides were black metal with holes rusted through them, the monkey bars had spikes on them so you would have to place your hands carefully, the swings were hanging by a single chain each, and the ground was made of sharp metal fragments instead of wood chips. Jackie shuddered. As dangerous as that looked, he had the feeling it could be much worse if it tried.

Something moved. He stopped in his tracks. He hadn’t imagined that, had he? He could have sworn he saw something over by one of the trees. “Who’s there?” he called, knowing it was probably a bad idea if the whatever it was could murder him.

Nothing. And then: “Bobby, I think it’s Uncle Jackie.”

Jackie felt his heart stop. He reached up and pulled off his mask and hood. “Trevor? Is that you?”

There was the sound of whispering, and then a small boy with his curly blonde hair tucked under a blue cap came running out from behind one of the trees. He ran right into Jackie with a soft thump, wrapping his small arms around him. “Oh!” Jackie gasped. “It-it is you!”

“Trevor!” A slightly bigger girl with shoulder-length brown hair stumbled out from behind the same tree. “You can’t just do that! He could have been the monster!”

“Nu-uh!” Trevor’s reply was muffled from where his face was buried in Jackie’s leg. “I know him when I see him!”

“We thought we knew Dad when we see him too!” Bobby scowled.

With one hand, Jackie reached down and patted Trevor’s head. “You two are...okay? You’re not hurt?”

Trevor looked up at him with wide grey eyes. “Nope. But I’m hungry.”

Still scowling, Bobby marched over to the other two. She grabbed her brother by the hand and pulled him away. “Be careful!” she hissed.

“You two think I’m An—the monster, don’t you?” Jackie asked.

Bobby gave him a glare that could have fired lasers. “You could be.”

“Well, I’m not. I know I can’t prove it, but you have to trust me. I’m here to get you out of here.”

Trevor gasped. “You’re gonna defeat the monster?”

Jackie crouched, getting down to the kids’ eye level. “I’m going to try. But before I do that, I need to make sure you’re safe. Do you know where we are?”

Trevor shook his head. Bobby pulled him closer to her, then said, “Well, if you don’ know you’re maybe not the monster. He says this is his base. Like a supervillain. We walked through a hole in the wall and came out here.”

Jackie had no experience on the matter, but he was willing to bet this was one of those pocket dimensions Marvin had mentioned. Anti’s home base. “The monster hasn’t hurt you?”

Bobby shook her head. “He’s chased us. He said it was a game.”

“Like evil tag,” Trevor piped up. “Only we don’ wanna get tagged.”

“That’s a good idea,” Jackie mumbled. The kids didn’t look hurt, just tired. Obviously he wasn’t a doctor, but they seemed fine. They might need counseling once they got out of this place, but they were physically okay. “Have either of you seen a way to get out of here? Like, another hole like the one you came in through?”

“No,” Bobby said. “But we haven’ been everywhere.”

“Well, then. Tell me where you haven’t been, and we’ll start there.”

Bobby nodded slowly. She still wasn’t entirely sure that Jackie wasn’t the monster, but Trevor liked him so she’d go along with this. Trevor, meanwhile, pointed at Jackie’s chest. “What’re you holdin’?”

Jackie looked down. “Oh! This is Sam. They’re a friend of Uncle Jack’s.” He tilted his hand so that the kids could see Sam, curled up in his palm. “They’re not feeling too good right now.”

“Can I hold them?” Trevor asked.

Jackie thought about it, then nodded. “Sure, for a minute.” He passed the little eye to Trevor, who needed both hands to hold them. For a second, Sam’s optic nerve-tail twitched. They glowed a bit brighter. “I think they like you, Trev!” Jackie smiled. “Why don’t you carry them for a little bit?”

“Really? Okay!” Trevor smiled down at Sam, then gently hugged them. Bobby stared at Sam. “Why are they an eye?” she asked.

“I don’t know, why are you a human?”

She thought about this question, then shrugged. “I think it’s because Mom and Dad are humans. So does Sam have a mom eye and a dad eye?”

“Maybe. Like I said, they’re a friend of Uncle Jack’s. I don’t know that much about them.” Jackie straightened up. “Now. We have to get out of here. I’m counting on you two to show me where to go. Can I trust you to do that?”

Trevor nodded eagerly. “We’ll go to all the new places!” Bobby also nodded, though not as enthusiastically.

“That’s the spirit! Lead the way!”

The two kids scampered off, heading out of the twisted park. Jackie paused for just a moment, looking around. He had a feeling someone was watching him, and he didn’t like it. But he couldn’t deal with that right now. The kids were the priority. He had to make sure they were safe, no matter what. So he turned and followed them.

He didn’t see the green eyes blink open out of thin air behind him. He didn’t hear the giggle, hidden under the constant hum. He didn’t realize everything was happening just as he intended.

#jacksepticeye #jacksepticeye fanfiction #jacksepticegos #septic egos #chase brody #marvin the magnificent #jameson jackson #jackieboy man #antisepticeye #brigid writes fanfiction #resurgence jse fic

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s-riusblck · 6 years

Text

ANGEL EYES II

LIGHTNING ERA - Part 2

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7

NOTES: I hope you all enjoy and that I’ve done this moment justice, I'm so bad at writing emotional stuff hahah. Thank you so much as always for all the support!! xxx

SHIP: Sirius Black x Reader

DESCRIPTION: Life in Azkaban. These were the three words that had haunted your life for twelve years, until the day you saw Sirius Black’s face on the front of the daily prophet. He had escaped, but after twelve years in Azkaban, could things ever go back to normal?

WARNINGS: Cursing

**********

4:04am. You paced back and forth in your living room, a strange sense of deja vu washing over you.

“And he didn’t say anything about why he wanted to see us both? At four in the morning?” You repeated, looking to Remus who was sat on the couch, tapping his foot on the floor nervously. He looked up at you, and shook his head.

Sighing, you looked to the clock again. 4:05am. He was five minutes late.

“And he definitely said four?” You asked, and Remus sighed, shaking his head.

“I’ve told you everything, (Y/N). All he said was to wait in your living room, and he would get here as soon possible. He only suggested it would be around four.”

Before you could respond, you heard a ‘pop!’ behind you. Whisking around, your eyes fell upon Albus Dumbledore. You had only seen him a very limited number of times in the previous twelve years, but the sight of him still stung a little, your conversation with him in the Order of the Phoenix headquarters replaying in your mind.

“Good morning, Remus. (Y/N), I must apologise that we meet yet again on such unfortunate circumstances.” Dumbledore said, giving you both a nod. Suppressing an eye roll, you cleared your throat.

“What’s this all about?” You asked, eying him curiously.

Without a word, he handed you both a rolled up copy of the Daily Prophet. You furrowed your brows at him, but he simply gestured towards the paper in your hands. You shot a curious glance Remus’ way, and began to unroll the paper.

The heat rushed from your body as your eyes focused in on the picture taking up most of the front page. You could of sworn your heart stopped beating for a moment. Taking a few steps backwards, you felt the couch hit the back of your legs, and you lowered yourself onto it. Your eyes didn’t move an inch. You recognised the eyes immediately. They were Sirius’ eyes. A soft sob escaped your lips as you traced your fingers over the picture. The image you had in your mind of Sirius was a young man full of life, love and determination. The picture in front of you told a completely different story. His eyes had lost their depth, they had lost their sparkle. His face was lined with exhaustion, his hair matted and his clothes ragged. He looked broken, but at the same time, you could still see a hint of the handsome man that was your fiancé.

‘Escape from Azkaban’. A small gasp escaped your lips as it dawned on you why you were looking down at a picture of Sirius on the cover of the Daily Prophet. You looked up, your eyes darting between Remus and Dumbledore, as you tried to comprehend what you had just read.

“He escaped?” You muttered, your voice shaky as you looked to Remus, taken in the look of shock you were sure mirrored your own.

“He did. Late last night.” Dumbledore confirmed, his voice as calm as always.

“But why now?” You continued, closing your eyes for a moment as you tried to piece it all together.

“The ministry believe he’s after Harry.”

Your head snapped up, your eyes narrowing. “Don’t. Don’t go there.” You warned, your voice low as your grip tightened on the newspaper.

Remus sighed, finally looking up to you. “This isn’t a time for personal feelings, (Y/N). Just let him explain.” He said. You watched Remus for a moment, before nodding, turning back to Dumbledore.

“Fine. Explain.” You said, not daring to glance back down at the paper knowing it would play to your emotions again, but at the same time, not daring to let it go.

“No matter what we all individually believe, we have to prepare for the worst.” Dumbledore began, and you bit down on the inside of your cheek, taking deep breaths to maintain your composure. “Harry could be in danger, and we have to be cautious so as to ensure his safety. He will return to Hogwarts as normal, and for now, those of us in contact with Harry will go along with what is reported in the Daily Prophet. Harry can’t know who Sirius Black really is. The boy had a tendency to be impulsive, and may go seeking answers. Extra protective measure will be placed on Hogwarts as we await further information on Sirius’ whereabouts. (Y/N), I suggest you move to a safer-“

“Respectfully, sir, I won’t be doing that. I’m perfectly safe here.” You cut in.

“(Y/N), I think you can appreciate that no matter what we all personally believe, Sirius Black is not going to be the same man he was when he went to Azkaban.”

“Unbelievable.” You said, laughing sarcastically. “Yet again, you refuse to give him even the benefit of the doubt. I think you can appreciate, Albus, that Sirius Black is my fiancé. He was there for me when when I had no one else, and I plan to do the same for him. I’m not going to shut him out.” You said, a tone of determination in your voice. Dumbledore watched you for a moment, and then gave you a nod.

“I can appreciate that.” He said. “I have some matters I must attend to back at the Ministry. Remus, I shall see you in a few weeks at Hogwarts. (Y/N), I hope we can meet on better circumstances next time.” And with one last nod, he was gone.

You turned to Remus, unsure of where to even start, but he beat you to it.

“I promised him I would take care of you, (Y/N). So, please, don’t do anything stupid. Just wait it out.” He said, a tone of desperation in his voice. You wanted to argue, but you couldn’t bring yourself to. Remus had done so much for you, and he had proven that above all else he had your best interest at heart.

“I promise. I won’t do anything stupid.”

——

“Are you sure you’ll be okay?” Remus asked again, and you shook your head in amusement. “I don’t have to go. There’s always next year.”

“Moony, I promise I’ll be okay. We’ll talk everyday. I can’t wait for you to tell me all about it.” You said, smiling across the table at him. The time had come for Remus to head for Hogwarts and take up his new role as Defence Against the Dark Arts professor. Truthfully, you were going to miss him a lot more than you would of ever admitted to him, but you knew it was an amazing opportunity for him that he couldn’t miss out on. He had given up a lot to take care of you when you were at your worst, and it was time now for you to give up something for him. “And besides, I’ll have twice as many teabags! You’re doing me a favour really.”

He laughed, finishing up the last bit of tea in his mug. Leaning across the table, you gave his hand a reassuring squeeze. “You’re going to be an amazing professor. Those students are so lucky to have you.” You told him, and he nodded.

Both of you stood up from the table, and you wrapped your arms around him in a tight embrace. “You know where I am if you need me.” He said as the hug broke, and you nodded.

“I know. Now go get ‘em, Professor Lupin.” You grinned, watching as he disapparated.

With a sigh, you cleaned up the kitchen, the usual loneliness washing over you as you moved around the apartment. When you were finished your usual tasks, you sat yourself down in the living room chair that sat next to the open window, watching out for any signs of Sirius.

——

The year went by in a very similar fashion. A lot of your time was spent sitting next to the open window, though as the months went on, you grew more and more frustrated. You knew you were being selfish. Sirius was on the run from Azkaban, the whole world was looking for him. How could you expect him to just show up at your doorstep? But to not even send you something as simple as a piece of parchment to let you know he was okay? It was driving you mad. The further into the year you got, the less time you spent at the window, the tiny sliver of hope you had left of seeing Sirius again fading. Maybe he had moved on from you, and maybe it was time you did the same. Maybe Dumbledore had been right all along.

It was late into the evening and you were laying on the sofa, a cup of tea in one hand and a book in the other. Suddenly, a face appeared in the fireplace, and you jumped, tea spilling down over your hand.

“Fuck.” You cursed, jumping up and putting the mug down, shaking off your hand. “This better be important, Lupin. That was an exceptionally good cup of tea.”

“(Y/N), I think Peter’s in Hogwarts.” Remus said, and you furrowed your brows at him.

“Peter? As in Peter Pettigrew?” You said. “Mooney, are you getting enough sleep?”

“No, (Y/N), I’m serious. Harry has somehow come into possession of the Marauders map, and he told me he saw Peter Pettigrew on it.”

You moved down onto the floor in front of the fireplace, the seriousness of what Remus was telling you beginning to dawn on you.

“Is he sure? Did you see him?”

“He seems pretty certain. He was out after curfew trying to follow him on the map. Professor Snape caught him, I swear that man can smell a chance to get Harry in trouble from a mile away. That’s besides the point, though, I’ve got the map, and I’ve been watching it ever since. I haven’t seen him yet.”

Your hands came up to rub at your temples, a dull ache forming in your head. “Remus, if Peter’s alive…” You began, and he nodded.

“I know.” He told you. “But we can’t jump to any conclusions. I’ll continue to watch the map when I can and I’ll keep you updated. Have you heard anything?” He asked, and you shook your head.

“No. Nothing. I was beginning to give up hope.” You shrugged.

“Hold on to it, (Y/N). You’ve done it for twelve years now, you can’t give up now.” Remus said, his tone as comforting as ever.

With a smile, you both said your goodbyes and you stood up from the fireplace, making your way back over to the chair by the window, the sliver of hope you had beginning to grow for the first time in twelve years.

——

8:38pm. The apartment was eerily quiet, the ticking of the clock being the only noise to break the silence. You kneeled in front of the fire, your fingers fiddling nervously. He was thirty eight minutes late. You glanced up at the clock again, groaning in frustration. Where was he?

“Come on, Remus.” You muttered nervously.

Remus was never late. It was a trait of his you really admired. He had been in Hogwarts for nearly a full school year now, and not once had he been a minute later than 8:00pm to appear in your fireplace for a chat. You thought back on the events of the previous few weeks. Soon after your initial chat about Peter Pettigrew, Remus confirmed what Harry had saw. His name was floating around Hogwarts on the marauders map, but Remus had never been able to come face to face with him. It baffled you. It changed everything. Anger was an emotion you were beginning to feel a bit too regularly for your liking, but it infuriated you. If Peter was alive all this time, why didn’t he come forward to clear Sirius’ name? Why was he hiding? Or what was he hiding?

8:51pm. Something was wrong. You knew it was, and you began to panic.

9:03pm. You knew you should of gone to Hogwarts the moment Remus had told you about Peter appearing on the map. It was insufferable not knowing what was going on.

9:16pm. You gasped in anticipation as a face appeared in the fire, but it soon turned back to panic as Albus Dumbledore’s face looked up at you.

“What’s going on? Where’s Remus?” You asked, your voice laced with concern.

“There’s no time to explain, (Y/N). Apparate to Hogsmeade and come to the castle. I’ll meet you outside the hospital wing.” And before you could ask anymore, he was gone.

Not wasting a moment, you grabbed your wand and thought of Hogsmeade. With a ‘pop!’, you were there. Your heart pounded almost as loud as your feet did against the ground as you ran towards Hogwarts. You could feel a pain in your chest developing, but you ignored it. The sense of urgency in Dumbledore’s voice rang through your mind as you picked up the pace. You tried to push all emotions aside as you ran through the halls of Hogwarts, afraid that the sense of familiarity or nostalgia would slow you down. These halls had held so much of your life, at a time when you had had so much hope and happiness.

Turning a corner, you spotted Dumbledore and ran to him, panting heavily as you slowed down in front of him. “Where’s Remus?” You asked.

“There isn’t much time, (Y/N). Remus is okay. Right now, you need to get to the top of the tallest tower.” He told you, and seeing the look of confusion on your face, he elaborated. “You were right about Sirius, (Y/N). There’ll be time for explanations and apologies later. Right now you need to get to that tower.”

Your head was spinning, your breathing heavy, and you could feel your legs begin to give out beneath you. You were right about Sirius. Taking a long deep breathe, you nodded and ran towards the tower, your mind racing a with a million possibilities of what could be waiting for you when you got there.

As you approached the door, your footsteps slowed suddenly at the sound of a familiar voice. ‘It couldn’t be’, you told yourself. Edging forward, you felt all the air leave your body as you saw through the doorway the two people who you had longed to see for twelve years. The one man that had captured your heart so many years ago and even after twelve years apart, still had such a tight clutch on it.

Your feet began to move without you even knowing it, and the crisp air hit you as you stepped out into the open, your eyes still locked on Sirius.

“Sirius?” You muttered, your voice barely above a whisper.

Three heads snapped around to look at you, but you were only focused on one. As his eyes met yours, a strangled cry left your lips. He stood up slowly, the eye contact not wavering for even a moment. You stood, staring at each other, for what felt like an eternity. Your head pounded as you tried to comprehend what was happening.

“(Y/N).” He said. The sound of his voice was enough to break through the haze in your mind. You ran to him, and as he always did, he caught you. Your body crashed against his as he stumbled back a few steps with the force, and you wrapped yourself around him, your hands gripping on to his hair in a desperate attempt to keep him close. You brought your head in front of his, your hands coming down to his cheeks.

Your eyes explored every inch of his face, your heart breaking all over again as you saw how run down he looked.

“I’m so sorry.” He croaked, and you shook your head, blinking away tears and running your thumb across his cheek to catch the few that fell from his eyes.

“Don’t apologise. Please don’t apologise.” You said, resting your forehead against his.

“You look…” He began.

“Old.” You said, letting out a small chuckle.

“I was going to say beautiful.” He finished, giving you a small smile.

“Sirius, I’m so sorry…. But, you have to go. Time is running out.” A voice said nervously from beside you, and you let out a shaky sigh. Although you didn’t know all the details, you could tell from the tone in her voice it was urgent.

You ran a hand down to his chest, gripping on to the material of his top as you pressed your lips to his. A heat erupted throughout your body, and your grip tightened as your lips moved together perfectly, as if they’d never stopped. As if it hadn’t been over a decade since you last kissed him. His hands gripped on to your waist, pressing your body closer to his. You wanted to hold on forever, to stay in this moment for as long as possible, but you knew you had to let go. If there was any hope of getting him back permanently, you had to let go. You were both breathless as you broke apart, your lips still brushing off each others.

“You have to go.” You mumbled, and he nodded, pressing one last kiss to your lips. Running a hand down his arm, you held on to his hand, giving it a squeeze as you stepped back.

“I love you.” He said, and you smiled, the tears beginning to build up in your eyes and blur your vision again.

“I love you.” You told him, and his hand slipped from yours as he turned to Harry, giving him a hug before climbing on to the hippogriff. With one last look, he was gone, disappearing into the darkness.

You watched after him for a few moments, before you looked to the two teenagers that stood before you. A smile graced your lips as you took in Harry’s appearance. He looked exactly like James, but with Lily’s eyes. Your heart swelled with pride, but ached at the same time as you remembered your two friends, and how unfair it was that they hadn’t gotten to see him grow up. Noticing the girl beside him fiddling with what looked like a time turner, you gathered yourself.

“Are you, uh.. Sirius’s wife?” Harry asked, and you shook your head, pulling out the ring on your necklace from beneath your jumper.

“I guess you could say almost wife.” You shrugged, and he let out a breathy laugh.

“He asked me to move in with you both before… Well, before he had to go.” And you nodded, moving closer to Harry and leaning down in front of him, taking his hand in yours.

“I’m so sorry for everything you’ve had to go through, Harry, but just know your mum and dad would of been so proud of you. James would of loved telling the world his son was Gryffindor’s youngest, and best, seeker.” You said with a chuckle. “And Sirius, he loves you so much. So much. You’re so loved, Harry. Don’t forget that.” You told him, closing your eyes to hold back tears as he suddenly hugged you tight.

“Harry…” The girls voice came from beside him, and you took a deep breathe, pulling back and placing a kiss on his forehead.

“Go. I’ll write to you, okay?” You reassured him, and he nodded, before running off through the door.

You watched after him, biting down on your lip as he disappeared from view. Once again, your future was uncertain, and you had no idea what was to come next. Despite that, though, you felt more at peace than you had for twelve years and you felt excited. Excited because there was hope again. However small, there was hope that you and Sirius would finally get your happy ending.

#sirius black x reader #sirius black x you #sirius black #harry potter #Harry Potter x reader #sirius black reader insert #sirius black imagine #sirius black imagines #lightning era

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