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#what yall have to know is that those are some hard to find
mxnd-infxction · 4 months
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havent been on all year yet lulz. its been bad so far i need to vent
i've been b1ng1ng/ov3r34ting every day, i'm at 117-point-something right now and i ate so many c4rbs today
i ended up puk1ng on new years at 4:30 am, not on purpose obv but good lord it was terrible 💀
my situationship hit me up earlier tonight but by god i cannot send them any pictures when i feel this bad about my 0v3r34ting, my bl04t, and how horrible i look lately. i feel really bad for them honestly but i really just can't do it
and i'm trying so hard to r3str1ct and not b1ng3 and shit (y'all even my MOM know i b1ng3 like 😨)
i just want this d1s0rd3r to start d1s0rd3ring again
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ryssbelle · 12 days
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Drew a bunch of Marinettes in a bunch of different artists styles it was a lot of fun!!
Artists who's styles I mimicked: @buggachat @hamsternamedmarinette @ladybeug @sabertoothwalrus and @anna-scribbles all epic artists 🤟😎
#my art#marinette dupain cheng#miraculous ladybug#miraculous fanart#style mimic#sorry for the @s btw#yall should go follow those artists if you dont already also#this was sort of inspired by a post the three artists on the top row made#i think they all got together and drew with one another#which is really cool#but i was genuinely confused because i mimic styles a lot#and ive seen others do it too so i was just like#wow they really know each others styles really well#until i thought about it and read their posts some more#style mimicking is really freaking fun and i think its really good practice#and a good way to explore other ways of doing things#like you really have to learn new techniques and get out of your comfort zone#also anna scribbles i could not find a recent pic of marinette in her main outfit#so thats the only marinette i drew in different clothes cuz i couldnt find a more recent ref of you drawing it#anna scribble marinette has privileges thats the others dont#but ye#i also threw my own style in there as a frame of reference to what me draw like#ive drawn marinette before just not in a loooong while#sabertooth walrus was the hardest for me to mimic cuz they have a broad range in their style#so its like which sabertooth do i wanna be in this pic#Buggachat has such a distinct style thats very clean and consistent which is amazing so they were easy#being easy or hard arent bad things either it also has to do with like styles meeting up with one another#buggachats and mine arent too too different in some shapes and aspects#so yeah itd be easier plus they drew marinette like 3 sec ago so i have more recent of a ref#as opposed to sabertooth who i have a recent ref of ladybug but not marinette so we got two diff styles in one
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the-acid-pear · 7 months
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today's prompts are spiders and self insert so i've been thinking of drawing nembone and a uh, bunger. but Im still thinking around the uh. ? i cant remember the word HELP the fucking COMPOSITION there.
#luly talks#i was thinking of formating it like a parody of a flash or mobile game where the character is like FEED ME x =D but i cannot find like#references.#btw another ideas i had was doing ONLY self insert and make a character select screen with my sonas#first i thought of a gif where you'd change selection making the border shine and the character change expression and get color#(otherwise they'd be greyed out) and then i thought of doing a more classic smash bros like character screen#but those two ideas would be too hard#i also thought of something more simple like just. my fursonas hugging yuri style#and then i was like no lets go back to nembone (my og idea as mentioned yesterday on the tags of my art post)#and i was CONVINCED today the prompt was path and i was gonna make a very cool scene with Nembone and Keabin sitting on a bar#and i hope yall know why i hope yall are tuned in with the completely neglected bugsnax oc luly lore but in case youre not first of all#shame on you but second its bc keabin actually is my save where ppl DIE#and i spoke in a post that i think is in my oc blog or maybe my self ship one either way im sure is crossposted on both but i spoke about#how fucking Low Nembone would be in a post Shelda's death path <- eh eh get it get it that's where the prompt plays!!#they'd also be saying something about wishing things could've been different or something#it'd have been a cool drawing and a great excuse to draw my guy keabin who has been borderline fucking retconned otherwise but hey#its not the prompt. so.#idk what i will do for tomorrow btw i dont have many complicated fits ocs juan has been in my brain for close to a decade or more#and he has never wore anything but a green tshirt and some pants#but ill figure something i might do Bloody#or i might double the fuck down and if i do bloody i can tie spiders to her and do nembone and keabin today#it is cringetober after all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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crest-of-gautier · 8 months
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made an eeny bit of progress in pq today... im like maybe 80% through the 3rd floor of you in wonderland and currently level 11...!
#pq#lizz.jpg#lizz.txt#i love how i say 'eeny' as if i did not play for like four hours. LOL.. i think i wanna play in smaller chunks next time#yall... i have so much fear of those gosh darn card soldiers... i dont want to know what my life is going to be like if they give f.o.e.s-#more gimmicks... THEY ARENT BAD I JUST. I REALLY DONT LIKE THE F.O.E. STARING AT ME#my (ougouoguough) of the f.o.e.s is so real that if i have energy i would totally make a doodle about it#dont really have much interesting things 2 report... i think next play session ill probably end up finishing the labryinth#it seems pretty close to done tbh esp since i stopped b4 the room with the three fucking f.o.e.s and im like#'i do not have the mental energy to figure out how to do this' (they say and proceed to write a text wall)#and im guessing we'll get to see the investigation team after finishing the labryinth?#the games being like REALLY silly right now but im like. squinting so hard at zen and rei you have NO idea how sus these guys are to me#not to go against my 'im not intelligent on this blog' policy but theres something about a thing that elizabeth said early on thats like#alerting the lizz sus radars. she said something like you wouldnt find living humans here and that they might theoretically be an entity-#that merged w/personas and shadows AND TO ME THIS IS A HGUE RED FLAG???#LIKE.... me just looking at how RYOJI fucking mochizuki is a thing and im like “ah i see now why they set it before ryoji” BECAUSE !!! AAA#because at this point sees wouldn't have met an entity like ryoji who is fucking shadow that is humanized by minato so uh like#if they met ryoji and were past dec 2 AND THEN PQ'D IT UP then they'd look at zen and rei in addition to what elizabeth said#then IDK WHAT IM SAYING BUT LIKE ZEN AND REI HAVE TO BE SOME KINDA ENTITY AND I DONT KNOW WHAT#for shits and giggles ill say death bc i like death as a thematic thing LMAOOO im a really delulu little guy rn dont talk to me#um. im being really normal right now yeah uh this should've gone under a read more oops ill do that next time#for my own sanity i will NOT go into what thoughts are brewing in my head (hypothezing what time the p4 cast was pulled from-#BUT ALSO THE WAY TEDDIE ALSO falls into elizabeth's description UGH screams into. a bucket.)#anyway for. something. thats not me spitballing i hope that i can see yosuke soon.. i want him in my party!!!!#i rlly like the game mechanics and while zen and rei have been great 2 start with they cant equip subpersonas... ough#ok thats. thats all. i did not expect to text ramble but (THIS IS ME WE ARE TALKING ABOUT i cannot shut up)#im having fun though!!!! its been nice to play smthn else for once LMAO i wonder how much ill get through b4 the month ends
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seosracha · 27 days
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HEART DEFENDER──────
౨ৎ⸻niki x fem!reader
⸻ synopsis, Nishimura Riki was truly and honestly, your sworn enemy, and everyone knew. You two shared lots of things, a friend group, academic rivalry, and most importantly school popularity. Receiving tons of confessions and notes on the daily from your fanboys and fangirls was nothing new. So you can't help but be shocked when he asks you to be his fake girlfriend for that same reason.
genre: enemies to lovers, fluff, highschool au
pairing: popular-footballplayer!niki x popular-fem!reader
wordcount: 11.5k !
tags: underage drinking, foul language/swearing, niki is an asshole, own characters included, y/n and niki are unrealistically popular but bare with me pls, jay is called a pervert😭, kissing
authors note! this was written for my beautiful babygirl , and it was also her idea so props to my pookie yall!!!😛 also no proof read so sorry for any errors!!
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A GENTLE HEAT falls onto the silk bed sheets, as a flickering blue light washes over the room, a sound waking you up from the dreamy state. You still had a hard time settling into the new reality that eloped you just a few days back. The summer was over, and so we’re all the exciting things you hadn’t been able to do. 
Although you didn’t mind, it brought you comfort to keep your body and mind active. You don’t like to mull over the fact that something is over, because that never brought it back, choosing to focus on every minute that was yet to come. 
Maybe that was exactly the reason you’ve become so popular amongst the male population of Alpine High-school, students swooning over your exquisite beauty, tall, well proportioned figure and beautiful mind. Some looks were only hungry for popularity and full of lust, but amongst all, you also found people who truly wanted to know you, and find out what was underneath the pretty shell. 
Some would call it cliche, to only stick around people who held the same status as you, or shared a similar popularity rank, but you truly never intended for that. Having two of the most popular students in one team, automatically makes the entirety of the group more desirable and unattainable. You never had control over any of these things, but you’d also be lying if you said it didn’t make you feel even more special. 
Your phone vibrates, Song Eunseok’s name displayed on the screen, messages filling up your home screen every second. You smile lightly and press one of them to shoot him a quick reply, preventing him from spamming you with keyboard smashes. 
Song Eunseok was one of your best-friends. He was there when others weren’t, and he was always the one to help you endure any pain in life. He was like a bandaid, keeping you safe from any infectious disease but also helping ease the pain, even if it didn’t feel like it at first. The affection in his tone, his words glowing with secrecy and honesty every time he spoke to you, that’s exactly what made him so notable to your heart. 
Kim Hana was also one of those people to you. Eunseok was good to you, but he’d never be able to substitute for a girl best-friend. You never treated Hana as a second option though. She wasn’t even a month older than you, but wiser than most. Hana always knew what to say or do, she was like a compass to you. You knew you could never lose her, or else you wouldn’t know which direction to walk towards. Still, behind the smart and intellectual facade, was a joyful and bright girl, who had the most infectious laugh you knew. Her smile was adorable and words of affection- comforting. 
Park Sunghoon was also a member of your clique, recruited by Jake who swam alongside him on the school’s swimming team. You’ve never been really close to him, he was more of a friend to you when others were around. That didn’t mean you didn’t care for him though. Sunghoon was different, he was very secretive and smart. He didn’t ever try, but always succeeded. He wasn’t flashy about it either, keeping most of his success to himself. 
Jake, who recruited Sunghoon, used to be your best-friend. You grew up with him, just like in every childhood best-friends movie, the two of you did everything together. Just like you, he moved out of his home country in his early years, which was one of the many things you had in common and could empathize about. You decided to go to the same highschool, following the promise you made in 4th grade; that you’ll always stick together. The reciprocation brought you a feeling of comfort and safety, at first you didn’t mind when he started getting closer with Nishimura Riki because you trusted him. You trusted him enough, and turned a blind eye enough until your once best friend wasn’t yours anymore. 
You tried to ignore the low pain it gave you, small weebs formed in your mind as you tried to justify Jake’s behavior, arguing that he still speaks to you so kindly. You were still in the same group together, spending most of your days together and laughing sweetly at the smallest things. But instead of calling you, he’d call Niki, instead of hanging out with you on the weekends, he’d hang out with Niki and instead of inviting you as his plus one to events, he’d invite Niki. 
That’s exactly why you hated Nishimura Riki, the last member of the seemingly ‘popular kid’ clique you formed. 
Niki was equally attractive and popular as you. He embodied a typical, bookish bad-boy character, the smitten look on his face winning girls hearts over every time. He was also a member of the football team, already earning a full ride scholarship for his sports successes. He was already an intelligent boy, but a free entry to college was nothing he’d deny. He was vastly athletic, but always dreamed of going to university. Niki may not have looked the part, but he truly was much more ambitious than many would guess. 
He didn’t have many reasons to hate you, but the sole fact that you were unbeatable, the first rank in school always alongside your name. He always stood proudly next to you on class president election day, but always ended up getting hurt when once again, you were chosen. Everyone loved you and even though he had his fair share of fans, he could never compare. 
So the satisfaction that taking away your best-friend from you brought him, was enough to console his damaged pride. It was enough to compensate for his stolen spotlight. 
You both had reasons to hate each other, and never even considered talking it out, even if you shared a friend group. Passive aggressive comments, and sarcastic remarks were enough to satisfy yours and Niki’s mind. 
___________
Niki, with his fair share of popularity, couldn’t get away from constant love letters clogging up his locker, or girls' heartfelt love confessions. With the face of an angel and skills of a child prodigy, it was inevitable in some way. Those same girls were the reason for his incredibly and annoyingly large ego. 
“Niki!” the brunette caught his attention with her squeaky and high pitched voice. 
He turned around to catch a glimpse at her, only to find her with a pink glittery box in hand. Niki could sense another thought out, insanely touching confession coming his way. 
“Do I know you?” he asked, trying his best to not make a rude face at the girl. At the end of the day he was the it-boy at his high-school, and had an image to upkeep. 
“You could get to know me. We have chemistry together!” she replied happily, completely neglecting the fact that his reply itself was a bit rude to begin with. 
“Is that supposed to be some sort of pickup line?” Niki chuckled, running a hand through his hair as his shoulder fell to his right. He leaned on the lockers trying to remember the girl he was speaking to. 
She pulls at the fabric of his blazer, a frisky look on her face “It could be if you want it to be” 
He felt his body tensing up, a wave of uncomfort speeding through his veins. He was used to girls shoving themselves onto him, but why couldn’t he be viewed as an equal to them? Just because he has stolen many women's hearts, didn’t mean he didn’t want to be treated with dignity and respect. 
He could feel a bead of sweat trickle down his spine as the unknown girl pushed her body closer and closer. His white shirt started to suffocate him, feeling the box she had in her hands press against his stomach. 
He could barely read the name Oh Jia off the girl's name tag, before backing away, making her stumble a little bit. 
“Don’t you think you’re getting a little too comfortable, Jia?” he asked. 
She took a deep breath. She thinks of the many nights she’d seen the boy infront of her standing proudly with a confident smile as he pulls her closer to his body. She is taken aback by the difference, wondering how she could've gotten so easily deceived by her own head to fall for such a fabricated version of Nishimura Riki, She had swooned over the cover, just like many girls before and after her. 
This was one of the many daily confessions the boy would receive. Some happened to be much more friendly and cute, even making Niki’s heart a little warmer. Some students just liked to test his limits, see how easy he can actually be. He hated that. He hated not being treated like a human being but rather a school attraction they all got to take turns trying out. 
Although you were sworn enemies, the similarity between yours and Niki’s experience love wise, was undeniable. 
“What is my pretty girl doing all alone? Where did all your friends go?” Hyunsik, a member of the student council, asked with a flirtatious tone stopping you from getting to your history class. 
“Yours?” you questioned with a calm voice, having an idea of who Hyunsik was. 
He smiled, wondering why you always played so hard to get. He was gorgeous, so what was your problem to just give into his warm embrace? 
“Don’t be like that” he answered, using his hand to push a strand of  loose hair behind your ear. 
You felt so incredibly uncomfortable. You had known Hyunsik for some time now, as the class president you did have to consult on important issues with him. 
“What do you mean, Hyunsik?” you asked, a wonky smile on your face as you tried to give the boy a sign that you weren't interested in him. 
“You know what I mean. C'mon Y/n, you don’t have to play so hard to get. We could have fun, I’d make you feel so good and happy” he confessed, his stance radiating confidence which was unbreakable. 
He was attractive, but his personality and ego completely erased any chances of scoring a date with you or many other girls. 
“I’m interested in someone else” you answered, backing away from him. 
“You always say that, yet you're still single” he said, offended by your relectuance. 
“I don’t think that’s any of your business though, Hyunsik. I have to go now” you said, not letting him say anything else. 
This wasn't the first time boy’s just assumed you’d be easy like that. Just like Niki, you hated it. You didn't mind the confessions, as long as they were kept cute and respectful. You hated being mean, and these situations just forced it out of you. 
__________ 
“Why don’t we call Minjun over here, you’ve been hanging out with him a lot, right?” Hana asked, turning to you. She shuffles to grab her phone, but you stop her. 
Niki rolled his eyes at her words, not in the mood to stubbornly try to keep a civil conversation with Minjun. Kim Minjun was a member of the football team, and the number two placeholder in school. He really was handsome- slim face and a defined jawline, dark thick hair, eyebrows not touched once but seemingly shaped by Aphrodite herself, captivating siren eyes that made you fear eye contact, and lastly plump cherry lips. You could go on about Minjun’s beauty for days and not get bored of the topic. 
He notoriously fought with Niki for the team captain position, and although never achieved it, still managed to be disliked by Niki. They had a visible rivalry. While Niki tried to beat Minjun for second place, Minjun tried to beat Niki for the team captain spot. The passive aggressive remarks only made it worse, but for the sake of the team they kept, or at least tried to keep it civil. 
It reminded you of your friend group. You always tried your best to hide your deep rooted hatred for Niki around everyone, for the sake of their peace. The difference was that Niki never tried. He couldn’t bear a minute without making a sneaky and rude comment towards you. In some way it made you feel better about yourself, knowing that you're mature enough to not bother your friends with your private issues. 
“He’s probably with the team” you answered, and she pouted at your response.
“He wouldn’t want to sit with Miss Perfect here, anyways” Niki snickered, poking at his lunch uninterested in what he saw on the metal tray. The pork cutlet seemed awfully indigestible today. 
“I think you’re more so the problem” Hana defended, knowing you wouldn’t probably respond to him. 
“It’s not like Minjun is perfect, c'mon. He’s an annoying, selfious fuckboy” Jake said, in an attempt to clear Niki’s name. 
But why couldn’t he defend you? Did he really dislike you that much? 
“He really isn’t though” you responded, and Jake seemed taken aback by your change in demeanor. 
It almost looked like he felt entitled to say anything, but you had no right to respond to him unless you weren’t agreeing with him. Maybe that was what was left after your friendship of 10 years, the entitlement. 
“Of course you’d say that, because you probably want him like all his other fangirls” Niki smirked, and pushed away his tray. 
“Dude, leave it. Can we just have a peaceful lunch period for once?” Sunghoon spoke up, looking up from his English notes. 
He usually never said anything whenever these tense situations happened. Sunghoon kept quiet, listening in on the meaningless words leaving your mouths. 
“I’m gonna go” you rose from your chair, and picked up all your things. Hana tried to stop you, but her attempts were useless, as you gave her a small smile and left the table. 
“Well, I will too then” Niki announced trailing right after you. 
He walked towards you, a stupid look displayed on his face. You hated that you didn’t have any power over him, letting him treat you like this for no good reason. 
“If you want to continue telling me how awful Minjun is, I really suggest you leave it, cause I’m not going to change my mind” you turned to him, as he stopped next to you by the lockers. 
“I just want to get some books from my locker, can’t I?” he tilted his head, and smirked evilly when he saw your annoyed look. 
Another thing you hated was having a locker right next to his. Whoever assigned them, must truly despise you.  Or potentially pray for your downfall.
He just scoffed at your lack of interest, and started to rummage through his pocket for the small key to his locker. 
As soon as both of your locker doors opened, a swarm of notes and pink, red or purple little envelopes fell out. Some were cutely decorated, with adorable glittery stickers, some just a simple paper ripped out of the author's notebook. 
You two looked at each other confused. You knew Niki was popular, and Niki knew you were popular, but not to this extent. 
It wasn’t an issue, for a long time, but as comical as it sounded this was starting to get annoying pretty quickly. Sometimes the both of you wondered what made you so special, what made you stand out so much. Was it the academic success that no other student seemed to achieve yet? Maybe it was the physical tasks that you conquered without breaking a sweat? Or was it just your appearance that was unique among all? 
His mind was rushing, but one idea came out on top of the bubble of thoughts. 
______ 
“You’ve got to be kidding me, Niki” you laughed at his absurd idea, wondering if Jake is somewhere recording this secretly. 
Niki can’t yet tell if you’ll buy it or not. The silence sinks into his skin, as the imprisoning walls surrounding you seem to close on him. Did he really just say that out loud? 
“Listen, we can just pretend to un-hate each other or something, and then date. It’s all fake, obviously. Do you think I’d want someone like you to be my girlfriend?” he responds. “We can’t tell anyone though” 
���I don’t think that’s a good idea” you mumble, and he chuckles. 
“Oh please don’t tell me this is about Minjun?” 
You look at him annoyed. Why does he suddenly care so much about your relationship with Kim Minjun? 
 “And what if it is?” you roll your eyes, turning away from his tall figure. 
“He doesn’t care about you, Y/n. Can’t you just agree, we both get something out of it” he says, exasperated. 
He reaches for your small shoulder, turning your body in his direction. He holds you while silence embraces the both of you. The sun subtly shines through the small window of the equipment room, illuminating his face, a sparkle in his eyes as he looks at you. 
“What is in it for me?” you ask quietly, the moment between the two of you, making your heart beat faster. 
Niki softens at the concern in your tone. 
He knew you liked Minjun, everyone did, but this much? Did you really care for that douchebag? Did you lay on your bed at night, your thoughts always coming back to Kim Minjun? What did he do to steal your cold heart so easily? 
“An empty locker, that’s for sure” he lets go of you “And assholes like Hyunsik won’t annoy you anymore, isn’t that enough?” he adds, his tone laced with confidence. 
“You know about Hyunsik?” you ask curiously. 
He stifles a sharp inhale, realization hitting him. 
Did you think he cares? He doesn’t. He couldn’t care less. 
He tries to calm his unsteady nerves, preventing himself from saying anything that could damage his uninterested approach to your person even more. 
“Eunseok told me,” he answered quickly, his gaze turning to the small window. 
You never told Eunseok. 
You never told anyone cause this wasn’t something abnormal. Yes, maybe Hyunsik was a bit forward about it, pushing himself onto you, but you just forgot about it after some time. 
“Alright’ you clear your throat “Let’s do it” 
Niki feels an unfamiliar warmth in his heart, trying to stifle the excitement that took over his body when he heard your words. 
“But what about our friends, Niki? Do you seriously think Sunghoon or Jake are that stupid?” you ask 
It floods him again; the comfort of his name passing your lips, and he doesn’t know why. He’s never felt this way. 
“Hana is a hopeless romantic, she’ll believe anything if you slap a ‘boyfriend’ label on it. Eunseok and Sunghoon don't care anyway, and Jake? I’ll figure it out” he answers, his voice so calm “Everyone else will just believe it as long as we make it believable” he proceeds cautiously, putting emphasis on the ‘we’.  
“I don’t get not telling our friends, honestly” you murmured, looking around the room. 
He sighed “No offense to Hana, but she’s the biggest blabbermouth I know” he confesses. 
You agree internally, not wanting to admit it, too proud of your friendship with the girl. 
“I’ll pick you up tomorrow” he says after a moment of tranquility, leaving the room after he finishes his sentence. 
You watch him step out and leave you alone with all the thoughts and worries. 
______
And so he did pick you up. 
You wondered if Niki had cleaned up his car for you, remembering the mess last time you were in it. Probably not though. 
“Let’s go,” he said, keeping the door open for you. 
He grabbed your hand tightly, pulling through the crowd of students gathered in front of the building. Some had a stupid look on their face, wondering how the two of you could ever be dating, some didn’t even budge. 
Your chest swells with a torment of emotions, as you feel his warm, wrought hand grip yours. Pride, confusion, determination swarm through your veins, making a mess of your head. You press your knuckles to the warmth of your cheek, flustered by the looks you were receiving. 
Your eyes scan the whole building, trying to find Minjun, worried what he’d say when he finds out. You never wanted him to think you were just playing with him, and by the looks of it, that’s exactly what he was thinking when his eyes spotted yours. 
A sad look of disappointment decorated his face, as you passed by, holding Nishimura Riki’s hand so tightly. 
You screw your eyes shut, chest rising and falling rapidly. You want to tell him everything, you know you could. But there was a boundary you promised to not cross, for yours and Niki’s peace. 
“This is bullshit” Sunghoon raises his eyebrows, as the two of you appear in front of all your friends. 
“The assignment you wrote for my physics class was bullshit, and I didn’t say anything. This-” he says pointing to your intertwined hands “This is for real, the real deal” he adds proudly. 
How long has he been acting? 
“When did all of this happen?” Hana asks excitedly. 
You didn’t like agreeing with Niki, and even though it was sad to a degree, Hana really was gullible. 
You smile “We just started talking, I guess. It really happened naturally” 
How long have you been acting? 
“But weren’t you just fighting last week? And I thought you had a thing for Minjun?” Eunseok asked. He wasn’t supposed to care. 
“No, no, Minjun is just a friend” you answer after a moment. 
Niki was surprised at your lack of hesitation, no signs of nervousness. 
“Well congrats then. I’m happy for you guys” Jake smiled, and his acknowledgment meant the world to you. 
You couldn’t not care for him after all this time spent together. You wished you didn’t care about what he thought, what he was up to, because it was no longer your place to ask or wonder. 
“I hope Minjun doesn’t feel sad” Hana ponders, her soft heart melting for the boy. 
You laugh at her kindness, but deep down you know she’s right “I doubt. I think I made it clear to him that I’m not interested” you reply in an attempt to calm her nerves. 
“I hope so, he’s really a good guy” she mumbles, a look of frustration on her face. 
You wonder why. 
“He isn’t but whatever” Niki professes, a disgusted tone lacing his voice. 
Eunseok laughs “One day anniversary and he’s already jealous” 
You never expected them to be so gullible, to fall for such a fabricated lie, but here they were laughing and making jokes about the two of you. It was hard to lie to your friends, especially Eunseok and Hana, but something in your head kept convincing you that this was indeed a good idea. 
“You should’ve made a big reveal at the game” Hana acknowledges, a sweet smile on her face as she imagines herself in your position. “Our school would win, everyone cheering you on and then boom- you run up to Y/nnie and kiss her” she tells, a twinkle to her eyes. 
Niki laughs, and this time it seems genuine. He likes the thought of that, but can’t quite figure out why. Air is taken out of his lungs as he imagines carefully taking your jaw in one hand, and pressing a sweet kiss to your soft lips, as everyone cheers him on for leading the team to yet another victory. 
He can’t be thinking straight. 
“That’s a little bizarre don’t you think?” Sunghoon asks Hana, remembering watching something similar with the girl. 
Hana shakes her head, and he just chuckles at her persistence “I’m just giving him ideas, subtly” 
“Very subtle” Niki answers, and she winks at him. 
“Are we still on for the after party at yours?” Eunseok asks, turning his head towards Jake who seems to be totally out of it, as he hurriedly copies Sunghoon's chemistry homework. 
“Yeah, yeah. No matter if we win” he mumbles, devoted to a completely different world at the moment. 
A small smile forms on your face. You would definitely hold Niki tight, making sure no girl pulls him out of your grasp for a quick seven minutes in heaven. It’s all fake, though. Nothing more than just a pact between two sworn enemies who want a little more peace in their life. 
“Even if we lose, we still need to celebrate a good game” Niki smiles, and Eunseok smiles at his attitude. 
“With a captain like you my guy, we ain’t never losing” Eunseok winks at Niki, receiving a small laugh and bow from the boy. 
You felt guilty. This was the first time in a while when everything felt so gratifying and free amongst your friend group. With the constant fighting and teasing you never seemed to notice the charming dynamic between everyone. It felt like all along the both of you were the problem, and maybe your friends accepted this suspicious relationship so quickly, because it meant they got to experience moments like this once again. 
“What do these fucking hieroglifs say, I can’t decipher this shit” Jake grunts with frustration, as he pulls the notebook closer. 
Sunghoon laughs and tries to carefully explain every line of text to Jake. 
Maybe you were too focused on your own problems with Niki to notice that this is what could’ve been of your friend group. 
____
You and Niki seemed to get closer as time passed. 
The both of you didn’t even notice it, the barrier between you passing by like a breeze. It came all so naturally, and you never knew you’d have so much in common with the boy you swore you hated. 
You would accustom him to his practice sometimes, and he’d proudly show you off to all his teammates. The lines between faking it and being truthful have faded by now, confusing your heart a little. But just a little. Because at the end of the day it was fake. 
“I think it’s time you pay me back,” Niki said, a mischievous smile decorating his face. 
You looked at him with a confused expression “For what exactly?” 
He smiles, and brings his backpack to his chest, rummaging through it to find the key item. 
Niki was smart, very smart. He didn’t earn the number three rank for no reason, proudly representing the school on the pitch and in numerous academic competitions. Yet his mind couldn’t quite understand anything written in his physics textbook. He passed by fine, but it never satisfied him to cheat on his tests, and pay Sunghoon to do his homework for him. 
“Tutoring? Seriously? And what did you do to deserve it?” you asked, raising your eyebrow. 
He smiles widely “Well I haven’t seen any sappy men bothering you, so I think you owe me this one” 
“I haven’t seen any sappy girls bothering you either, so I thought we were even” you answer, not giving into his request just yet. 
You knew you’d do it. You did everything he asked you to do. 
“C’mon Y/n! I need your help, just this one time, please?” he pleaded, a pout on his face “I won’t be able to play in the game this week if I don’t get a good grade on this test” he adds in an attempt to convince you. 
You laugh at his desperation, and nod your head “Fine, but you owe me one” 
He nods hurriedly, and pulls out all the things you’ll need to give him the greatest tutoring session ever. 
“Imagine you’re driving a car” you said sketching a simple diagram “When you hit the brakes, what happens?” 
Niki furrowed his eyebrows, and you wondered how he couldn’t comprehend such a simple concept as Newton's laws. It was cute in a way. 
“Well I slow down, but that’s too obvious. This is probably a much more complex answer, isn’t it?” he pondered the question. 
“No Niki, it’s that simple” you laugh “That’s Newton's first law in action. An object in motion stays in motion unless acted upon by an external force. When you hit the brakes, you apply force to the car, causing it to decelerate” 
His eyes lit up in understatement, as he tried to solve another question you threw at him. 
“Was it really that hard?” you asked him with a small smile, and he hesitated at first. 
His eyes glazed through the notebook, but soon enough he answered “Not really. It was much better when you explained it rather than Ms. Lee” 
“I’m glad” you answered “If it’s really that bad, you can ask me for help” 
“It really isn’t that bad though” Niki answered, with a chuckle. 
“Oh c’mon you don’t even understand Newton's laws, it is bad” you reply. 
“Okay you geek, I get it. But I thought I have to deserve your tutoring?” he questioned, a small smirk on his face. 
“You gotta help out a dumb bitch once in a while” he pretends to be offended at your words. 
Not so long ago, he’d probably blow up at you for those words. He’d probably make a scene, resulting in everyone being uncomfortable for a good two days. This time was different. You were different. 
“The way you talk to me- it’s unlike you” you inquire suddenly, after a moment of calming silence. 
“How come?” Niki asks, not raising his gaze from the workbook. 
“Your voice is softer” you smile, and he can’t help but reciprocate. 
It brings him a weird comfort. The words passing by your lips, make his heart warmer, a trickling yet pleasing feeling in his spine. He can’t quite pinpoint the moment you touched his mind so intimately, erasing any barrier between you and him. Being with you felt so easy. It feels so easy, that he even forgets why he hated you in the first place. 
“Are you coming to my game?” he asked, a new found passion for physics coursing through his veins as he solves yet another problem with ease. 
You looked at him adoringly “Obviously” 
He chuckled “I’m glad” he looked up at you “But I thought you hated football” 
Well you did. You hated it because Niki played it. But even if he didn't ask you, you’d come. 
“I just don't understand it, that’s all” you gave him a half smile, looking through his textbook for any more challenging questions for Niki to solve. 
“You don't have to be there if you don't want to, Y/n” 
You seem to enjoy the way your name slips his lips so delicately. 
“No no, I want to be there for you, and I think It’d be sus if I didn't show up. Plus, Hana has some new crush and wants to see him play” you chuckle, and so does Niki, noting that the girl falls in love with anyone and everybody. 
“Is it Jay? I’ve seen them mingling before” he questions and you shake your head. 
“Jay was last month, old news. I think his name is Sungchan? Or Seunghan, I don't know” you ponder the question, going back to that one conversation you had with the girl about her new love interest. 
The possibility that he’s also not the guy she likes now is very high-her heart swooning for any man that gives her the time of day. 
Hana was gorgeous and incredibly sweet. No wonder she had a new talking stage every week, no boy being able to handle her. 
“Sungchan. He’s a good guy. I can approve of him, definitely better than Jay” he recalls many situations including Jay, where the boy proved himself to be absolutely useless and weird. 
Maybe it was his team captain complex, but Niki seemed to notice many things that others didn't. His duty was to take care of his teammates, so catching onto the tiniest things was inevitable. 
“What’s wrong with Jay?” you question, and he laughs wondering if the words will even peer out of his mouth. 
“He’s like, fucking perverted” he laughs “Well maybe not that badly, but still, he’s just proper dodgy” 
You're shocked at his admission, and internally  glad your best-friend  got over him so quickly. 
Your conversation with Niki seemed to flow so easily. You never had to try hard, something always slipping off your tongue, his personality making it so easy. You never thought you’d have so much in common with Niki, so much to talk to him about. You were so fixated on something that was beyond his control, instead of pissing Jake off for being a horrible friend. 
____ 
“I need to go to the bathroom quickly before the game starts” Hana said hurriedly, her small figure rushing towards the bathroom, making you smile to yourself. 
You blush. You remember the brief mention Hana made, expressing the want for a more romantic expose of the relationship between you and Niki. You wonder if Niki remembers too. 
Usually you never cared for the highschool football games, skipping in order to study more or spend time with your best-friend. This time was different, you felt like a trophy to your oh-so-fake boyfriend, excited to see what comes after he scores a winning touchdown. 
“Can we talk?” Minjun’s voice takes you by surprise, making you stop in a halt. 
“Uh, sure” you reply, taken aback by the sudden serious tone and demeanor, knowing him from the bubbly personality and sweet voice. 
“I know you’re faking it” your heart sinks “Why are you doing this? Why are you doing this to yourself? Seriously, Niki?” he asks, and you go completely silent, trying to figure out a reasonable answer to his accusations. 
“I don’t know what you’re talking about Minjun,” you say after a moment of uncomfortable silence. 
A frown tugs at the corners of his mouth. He didn’t expect that reply. He doesn’t know what he really expected in the first place. 
“For whatever reason you are doing this, you could’ve just asked me. Why didn’t you ask me? I would’ve helped you, no matter how stupid it is” he kept going, and it felt like you were digging yourself deeper into this lie. 
He remembers standing in this same place, your hand hitting his arm playfully, your eyes lighting up at anything he said. In some way, he feels just as barren and vulnerable in your silence as he had that day. 
“Minjun, I think you should go join the rest of the team. They’re probably looking for you” you answered, wondering why Hana hasn’t come to save you by now. 
“I really liked you Y/n. Like really fucking liked you. I don’t know why you're doing this, especially why you’re helping out that asshole Niki” he added quietly, as Hana came up to the two of you. 
“Minjun!” she smiled at him, and he forced one himself “Fighting Minjunnie! I’m rooting for you! We both are!” she cheered. 
“Surely” he said, leaving the two of you. 
Hana turned to you confused with Minjun's sudden ignorance “Did you two fight or something?” she asked. 
“It’s nothing. I think he’s just stressed out” you replied calmly, leading the girl out to the bleachers. 
You tried to focus. You tried to be the perfect (fake) girlfriend for Niki, as he played one of his most important games, but Minjun’s words sunk so deep. They were all you could think about. 
You couldn't quite figure out why you didn't just admit it. Why didn't just tell him everything and end the bet with Niki? You wanted to so badly before. 
“Sungchan is playing like a bitch right now” Eunseok commented, disappointed with his friends performance. 
“Don't say that, Eunseok!” Hana slaps his forearm and he laughs at her anger. 
At least you knew she was still crushing on him, instead of Jay. 
“No seriously, what is going on with that man” Sunghoon said, squinting slightly, his eyes trailing behind Sungchans figure. 
Hana kept hushing them, begging for her friends to not speak so badly about her soon-to-be husband. You found it adorable, noting to ask Niki to set her up with him. 
“Our boy is doing so well though. Maybe he actually needed a girl in his life” Eunseok smiled at you. 
You felt a heat rush to your cheeks at his words, wondering if he actually performed any better this time. 
Maybe he was trying to show off in front of you? Or make you proud? 
“He’s been training like crazy” you say, and they keep hyping him up. 
“Jakey, are you okay?” Hana asked the boy sitting next to you, concerned when she noticed his tired face. 
He smiled “I’m fine, Hana. Don’t worry” he said fondly “Look Sungchan is waving at you” he pointed, the girl immediately turning her figure towards him to wave back. 
“Did you just see that? He waved at me! Sungchan waved at me!” Hana gleamed excitedly, Eunseok looking at her with disgust. 
“I can’t believe you like his bitchass” he half-smiled, shaking his head in a playful act of disbelief. 
“Aren't you two friends? Oh I’m so telling him about this” she replied, and he put his hands up. 
“Maybe your fantasy will come true” you inquire, and Hana’s mind races back to the moment she imagined a dreamy kiss on the field. 
“With the way he’s playing, I doubt there will be anything to celebrate” Jake said, and Hana hummed tiredly. 
“Can you guys leave him alone? He’s tired, okay?” she mused, and everyone nodded, done with teasing the girl. 
You can’t help but stare at Niki. Even with the heavy gear, he still manages to look good. When did he get so attractive? How come you’ve never noticed the pretty little mole on his chin, his gorgeous lips that begged for your touch, and eyes that grew whenever he talked about something he loves. He was right in front of you this whole time. 
You practically begged for Minjun’s attention just a couple weeks back, yet now you felt yourself fading away from the feelings for him. You can’t bring yourself to come up with any conclusion, or to bother with distractions, but why? Why was it so hard to just accept the truth as it was: you wanted Niki to want you. 
The game was nearing the end, and Niki could already smell the victory coming his way. He wanted to make you proud, he wanted to see your smile while you ran up to him, praises spewing from your mouth as he hugs you tightly. He hated that it was all fake, the realization dawning upon him; he wants you to want him. 
But he knows deep down that it’ll never be the two of you. 
A loud horn breaks your trail of thoughts, the audience screaming happily as Niki scores the winning touchdown. It was just like how you imagined, wondering if he’ll actually kiss you now. You know you wanted him to. 
He took off his helmet, his hair ruffled, beads of sweat falling down his face, but a wide smile when he spots you with a wide grin striding towards him. It’s just like he imagined. 
He doesn’t know what to do. Everyone is looking, and this is the moment he could victoriously hold you. It would make his ego grow, the perfect highschool popular kid image never dwindling, but what would you think of it? God what if you pushed him off of you in front of everyone. 
As much as he could prevent things from happening or predict anything, he couldn’t have known that you would be the one to initiate his deep rooted fantasy. He couldn’t have prepared himself for your pretty lips that pressed against him in a chaste, sweet kiss. You felt so good against him, and he couldn’t find himself pulling away. He never expected himself to enjoy such a fucking cliche moment- but here he was, wanting more and more. 
He wants to tell you everything in that moment- how he wanted this too, how he’d imagined your lips against his, and how he wants to kiss you everywhere. He knows he could. He’d even blame it on the slip of his unruly tongue. Yet there was a boundary he’d have to walk upon, a fear of losing you prevailing his selfishness. He knows he won’t. 
“Wh-” he tries, and fails to still his breathing. Niki hopes you can’t hear the tremble in his voice “How was it?” he asks, his voice unsteady. He doesn’t care though. 
“Your game or the kiss” you smile, and he wonders how you can be so calm about this. 
He smiles shyly “Both” 
“Stop” you laugh and he feels himself float above his body “You did great” 
“All for you” his response is amorous. 
Niki can’t help but laugh at your silence, watching you replay those words in your head. He pats your head, and throws his arm over your shoulder. 
How could any of this possibly be fake? 
“Good fucking game dude” Eunseok exclaimed, with a bright smile on his face, as everyone else decided to join you by Niki’s side. 
You looked around, a giddy and gleeful Hana, hugging a tired and sweaty Sungchan, as he smiled at her affection. Everyone had happily come down to congratulate the team, but Minjun was nowhere to be seen. Maybe you never intended to hurt him, but you so obviously did. 
“Jake you better fucking continue this energy at your disgustingly rich mansion” Sunghoon warned, and Jake smiled at his words. 
“You don’t have to worry about that” he replied contentedly, and you were glad to see him like this. 
Jake was rich. Like really fucking rich. To the point that he was offended when ‘eat the rich’ was trending, defending that he didn’t choose this life. His mansion in the hills was the go to spot for summer and any other party.
 But then again, it’s not like he didn’t have people to clean up after everything goes silent. 
_____ 
“Y/n!” you turned, your eyes meeting Wonbin’s, as you entered the kitchen you knew better than anyone present. 
You smiled, as the boy moved in your direction holding a red solo cup. 
Wonbin was your designated drink mixer and party buddy for whatever event hosted by whoever. You wouldn't call him a close friend, rather a person you’d talk to only on a special occasion. 
“Where your boyfriend at?” he asked with a grin, making you chuckle. 
The word didn't make your heart feel weird anymore. It felt so natural, normal, and sometimes you’d even forget it was all fake. For the past couple of weeks you’ve learned to forget easily, not wanting to pick apart Niki’s actions to maybe notice a pattern. You didn’t want to accidentally misinterpret. 
“Probably playing some stupid game in the living room” you sighed, hoping to get a little more out of him this time. 
You knew that the fake relationship was coming to an end, it already had gone on for way too long. 
“Mhm” Wonbin hummed, resting his body on the kitchen counter “It’s fake isn’t it?” he asked, taking you by surprise. 
You had absolutely no idea what to say. Wonbin really wasn't a part of any friend group you knew or were in, so what was the shame in telling him the truth? But it’d hurt your pride too much to say the truth out loud. 
You avoided eye contact, not knowing what reply would secure your safety and not damage your pride. Your silence made Wonbin laugh “C’mon, you can tell me” 
“It’s so embarrassing” you admit, and he shakes his head. 
“Not really. There’s plenty of girls who dream of this whole fake dating type of shit” he defended, and it made you smile lightly. 
He was right. There were girls out there who fantasized about a fake relationship, and there definitely were also girls who dream about a relationship with Nishimura Riki. 
Even though you initially hated his guts, maybe you were lucky after all? 
“I just can't comprehend the fact you chose Niki out of all people to be your fake boyfriend” he chuckled, and took a sip of his own drink. 
“It was his idea, I promise” you replied, and Wonbin mouthed a ‘no fucking way’, unable to imagine Niki, the person who swore he hated everything about you, ask you to be his fake girlfriend. 
“People can be really annoying, and I guess we just had some things in common after all” you added, and he nodded, still trying to visualize the situation you described. 
In a way it felt good to tell someone. You had been hiding it for so long, the lies eating you alive. 
It had been so long that you didn't even know what had become of this initially fake relationship. The line had already been blurred a long time ago, and it was hard to move along it at this point. He had done so many things, in private, that you didn't know where you stood anymore. 
“I can tell you actually like him” Wonbin admitted, once again taking you by surprise “The way you talk about him, it’s different” 
“You act so smart and psychological, it’s so annoying” you huffed, and turned away from him, chugging the drink he had previously made for you. 
He laughed “The truth hurts, doesn't it?” 
“I don’t like Niki” you said, trying to sound as confident as you could, but Wonbin saw right through you anyway. 
He didn't want to continue the topic, knowing he had already exhausted your limits. You also knew that no matter what, admitting something like that out loud wouldn't be easy either. 
The built up hatred and anger you had for Niki, couldn't have just disappeared so easily after a couple conversations and hangouts. But it did. And it frustrated you so much. 
“You guys playing spin the bottle in the living room with us?” a red faced Hana asked, peeking her head into the kitchen slightly. 
“With us, meaning?” Wonbin asked, making Hana slightly stumble into the kitchen. 
She started putting down her fingers “Well me, obviously” she smiled “Sungchannie, thank god” she let out a steady, thankful breath “Some girls, Oh Jia, Lee Chae, I don’t really recognize the rest. Oh, and Eunseok, Yang Jungwon, Minjunnie and some others” she went on, her drunken state making the explanation much longer than it should've been. 
“No, no, no! Niki too! Y/n you need to come!” she exclaimed, eyes wide. She took your hand and pulled you with her. 
You looked at Wonbin pleadingly, and with a small smile he trailed right behind the two of you. He always claimed to be ‘too old’ for those type of games, but always ended up staying till the end of any. 
Park Wonbin was truly full of shit. 
Your eyes met Niki’s as he sat in the circle, his back pressed against the couch. You looked at him, mouthing ‘what are you doing’ and he pointed to Oh Jia sitting across from him. 
You knew she liked him, and it definitely didn't make you happy. 
“I can see some couples here, yall into shit like this?” Jungwon asked, eyeing not only you and Niki, but Hana and Sungchan who seemed to have already made the news that went around school. 
You chuckled quietly and shook your head “It’s nothing that serious, just a stupid game” 
“It will be serious for you soon” Jia mumbled, her friend turning to her with a shit eating grin. 
Oh if they only knew how absolutely out of it they looked. What the fuck were they even talking about anyway. 
“I don’t think we should be playing this” you whispered to Niki, who previously patted down a seat for you next to himself. 
“Look how many people are playing, doubt me or you will get chosen” he smiled, and you nodded.
Still, isn't the sole fact you are even agreeing to participate weird? Shouldn’t you be mingling in a closet somewhere deep inside the house? God what was he thinking. This was so unbelievable, and you weren't surprised  that Wonbin had caught on. 
“Me first!” Hana cheered excitedly, as Eunseok had finally brought a bottle to play with. 
You looked over at Sungchan, who had a sad expression on his face. You could see his eyes praying on the bottle to land on him, his hands trembling with each spin. It was cute. 
The Gods above must have heard his prayers, the bottle landing on him with no doubt. 
He smiled and leaned into your bestfriend to plant a quick kiss on her lips. She pouted and grabbing his head, pushed for more. Maybe she was drunk, but you knew she’d remember this well. Although a witness, you’d hear about it for a long long time. 
“I’m guessing you don’t want to spin, Sungchan?” Eunseok chuckled, and the boy holding onto Hana, shook his head no. 
“Two players down so quickly” a boy with black hair, who you didn't recognize, commented. 
While Jungwon went in to spin, your eyes caught Minjun’s. You couldn't read him, his expression stone cold. He was either mad at you or didn't care. That’s the thing, you didn't know. 
“Stop looking at him” Niki whispered, cutting your moment with Minjun short. 
“I think he’s mad at me” you said, and Niki furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. 
“Why?” he asked, eyeing Minjun down. 
“He figured it out, you know, figured us out” you replied, putting emphasis on the word ‘us’ “I didn't admit, obviously, and that’s why I think he’s mad. He’s convinced I played him on purpose” you added, and Niki’s gaze softened. 
“I’m sorry” he said quietly, his eyes falling onto his lap. 
You looked at him confused, “What are you talking about?” 
He finally looked over at you, his face displaying a half smile, that felt cold to you “I ruined your chances with Minjun. I guess I was only thinking about myself back then, so I’m saying sorry. I can talk to him when this is over” he answered, and you felt your heart break. 
He didn't like Minjun, you knew it very well. Minjun knew it too. But somehow he felt bad for the both of you. If only he knew how much you didn't care about Kim Minjun at this moment. How much you actually cared about the boy next to you. Maybe if he knew he wouldn't feel so sorry, you thought. 
“You don't have to be sorry, Niki. We both wanted this” you smiled, and squeezed his hand. 
“I can tell Niki really wants to go now” Sunghoon exclaimed, and hurried Niki to spin the bottle. 
The boy hesitated, looking over at you. You nodded for him to go ahead with a smile. God was this weird? You agreeing to your (fake) boyfriend playing fucking spin the bottle. Not only that , but playing with him. This was so stupid. 
He took the small soju bottle, and spinned it lightly. He prayed it would fall on you. 
Or one of his bros, no homo of course. 
The music was blaring, and you hoped that bottle could feel your intense stare, successfully landing on you. 
As much as luck was on Sungchan’s side today, he seemingly took all of it with him earlier. The bottle pointed straight at Oh Jia, the girl who was known for her little obsession with Niki. 
She looked at you with a disgusting smile, and moved her body towards Niki. He looked at you, and you didn't even know what to say. You couldn't tell him no, he wasn't yours after all. 
“Sorry, Y/n” she muttered, and you felt your blood boil at her annoying, high pitched voice. 
She moved even closer, but her actions were stopped with Niki moving the bottle's nozzle to point at you. 
He didn't even let you or Jia speak, eagerly going in to kiss your lips he missed so much. It hasn't even been 3 hours since you initiated the first one, but his lips starved for your touch. You could feel it. You could feel the desperation in his movements. The taste of his chapstick mixing in with the saliva, it was much more passionate than last time. 
“Payback for last time” he mumbled, pulling away, his voice unsteady. 
You looked at him dumbfounded. What the fuck did he just do? Was this another stunt to show off his cool, popular boy persona, cause it seemed just like that. But you couldn't blame him either, you started it. 
No matter what, it felt good, and you wondered how to get yourself to stop. 
“That’s cheating!” Jia’s friend exclaimed, crossing her arms. 
“The bottle is clearly on her, I don't know what you're talking about” Wonbin defended, and you smiled at him. 
Jia huffed, leaving the game along with her friend. 
“We’ll leave too” you said, watching them go upstairs. 
Jungwon sighed “I’m forced to kiss the boys now” 
You looked around, not a single woman in the circle that was initially full. 
You pulled Niki’s hand, taking him to an empty room. He felt confident at that moment, rehearsing his confession in his head. He was going to tell you. He was going to tell you, and it was going to be amazing. You’d listen to him in awe, and then agree to be his actual girlfriend. 
“I have something to tell you” he said, as you closed the door behind yourself. 
He sat down on the bed, and you stood in front of him “Me too” 
“You go first” he smiled, and you looked out the window, the words lingering at the tip of your tongue. 
You wanted to tell him how you actually felt. But you knew you couldn't. You were enemies, nothing more. 
“We should end this,” you said after a moment of silence. 
_____ 
Things had gone back to normal. 
You didn’t expect much from Niki, guessing he’d either be overly nice to you, expressing his thankfulness for helping him get rid of annoying fangirls, or go back to being annoying himself. 
But he was neither. He didn’t say anything. Just like he didn’t say anything that day, he had gone completely quiet ever since. Instead of teasing you, he ignored you. 
He ate lunch with the football team, and it hurt you to see him laugh purely with them. It even seemed like he had gotten along with Minjun, which confused you even further. They hated each other, but now? It seemed like they were just laughing at your misery, getting high off of seeing you like this. Was this just a huge plan to get you looking like a complete loser?
Maybe he should’ve been sorry that day, not only did you lose Minjun, but everyone of your fanboys at this school. That sounded awful, but it was partially true.
You two had only revealed the 'breakup' to your closest friends, not exactly reaching any agreement regarding the rest of the students. 
You could pretend to be mad at him in front of your friends, but it hurt you so much. It hurt to see him behave like this towards you, knowing you did nothing wrong. You two were never real, so why was he so different so suddenly. You just hoped that it was a performance for your friends to make it more believable, but as days went by, you started to doubt it. 
“This is a sign that I shouldn’t regret not dating Hana,” Sunghoon chuckled, looking over at the table Niki was seemingly having more fun at. He never laughed like this with all of you. 
Was it all for show?
“Fuck off” you mumbled, looking down at your lunch, which was vastly unappetising today. 
“It’s not your fault, Y/n, don’t worry. For all I know, it was probably his fault anyways” Jake said, which made you suddenly look up from your food for the first time in a while. 
“You defending me?” you chuckled, and he shrugged. 
You looked over at Niki once again, attempting to catch him looking at you too. 
But he can’t. He can’t bear to look at you. He can only think about the dark heat of that room, your words ringing in his ears. Resisting the searing force that wanted, more than anything, to try and tell you again. 
“God, this is so annoying!” Hana exclaimed “Y/nnie didn’t do anything, and he’s acting like a pussy all of a sudden” 
She pouted, a weird vibe circulating all of you today. It felt like you were mourning him in some way. 
You felt your phone vibrate in your pocket, a text message from Minjun lighting up your homescreen. It was ironic, a picture of you and Niki on your lock screen, a message from Minjun decorating it. 
Minjun: Can we talk? 
You thought about replying, the scenarios of him playing a stupid prank on you along with Niki replaying in your mind. Nevertheless, you texted back a short confirmation, and locked your phone. 
You could feel his eyes on you, as you set your phone down on the table. 
“What did you want to talk about?” you asked, your voice unsure of the situation. 
It felt familiar, meeting in the equipment room, but this time instead of Niki who had the prettiest face out there, it was Kim Minjun.
“I knew it was fake” he said, and you felt a heat rise to your cheeks. 
You looked away from him, your eyes landing on the window. The sky was gray, the sun no longer shining in through it. 
“I don’t want to talk about this again, Minjun,” you sighed, tired of the topic already. Especially tired of talking about it with him. 
“No that’s not the point” he stopped you from leaving, you turned towards him once again. 
“Then what is it Minjun? Did Niki tell you all about it? Did he tell you how stupid I was to fall for him, even though it was all fake? Did you get me to come here only so you could make fun of me for being so naive? Is that what it is?” you blurted out. You had suddenly lost control over your words, your response coming out much harsher than you intended. 
“What are you talking about? Do you seriously think I’m plotting behind your back with Niki?” he asked hurriedly. 
Now that he said it, out loud, it sounded so stupid. You knew Niki long enough to know he hates Minjun more than he has ever hated you, and would never ever make any deal with him.
“Maybe” you huffed, turning from him “I don’t know Minjun. Can you just say it already?” 
He sat down on the chair in the far right corner, his hand signaling for you to come closer, patting down the chair next to him. 
“I guess I did sort of figure it out, the fact that what you and Niki had was fake. But he told me about it himself recently. He also said you didn’t intend to hurt me, and that he forced you to do this whole fake dating thing” Minjun relayed the message, and you didn’t know Niki would remember your conversation during that stupid game. 
Niki was evidently mad at you for ending things with him, but encouraging Minjun to try with you once again? That was what pissed you off the most, you couldn’t figure him out in any possible way. One day you can’t figure out the actual intention behind his words, exchanging sweet words and kisses, and the other, going back to complete strangers. Not even enemies, strangers. 
“He really said that?” you asked, and Minjun nodded “I really didn’t want to hurt you Minjun. I’m sorry for leading you on, in some way. I should’ve never agreed to it in the first place” you add, avoiding eye contact with the boy. 
You hear him chuckle, and with a furrow to your eyebrows you look up at him. 
He smiles “It’s not your fault I already know that much. I shouldn’t have blown up on you before the match like that anyways. It truly is none of my business who you hang out with” he assured, and it made you feel a little better. 
“I know, but I just hope you can still speak to me comfortably after this” you gave him a small smile, still unsure of your situation with him. 
“I’m not going to try and get with you again though, don't worry” he said calmly, and although you knew it, it still felt weird to hear. 
You chuckled “Not to sound selfish, but why? Am I not cute anymore?” you pouted sarcastically, and he laughed. 
“I can see you like him, like a lot. I even felt stupid for saying those things to you, cause you made it so believable at the party. The way you look at him, the way you speak to him, that’s not fake. All of it is real, and I wouldn’t want to stand in the middle of that” he answered, and you felt your heart skip a beat. 
And you thought you were good at hiding it. 
“Niki doesn’t feel the same though” you gave him a sad smile, fiddling with the material of your sweater. 
“You think so?” he asks, but it doesn't necessarily sound like a question. 
You hum in agreement, and he chuckles lightly “The same goes for him. Trust me it’s real. I can see it, hear it and feel it. The way his voice was so sad yet hopeful when he spoke to me about you, I know he likes you. Niki is just really stubborn, and he’d rather live in misery and not tell anyone instead of just admitting his feelings to you, or honestly anyone else” he explains, and you feel your heart start to beat faster. 
Was he right? Did Niki like you? Or did Minjun have a terrible judge of character and all this way a complete bullshit.
“What should I do then? Gosh this is so annoying” you sighed, combing your fingers through your hair. 
“Tell him? What else is there to do? If I’m wrong, which I’m not” he smiled proudly “-and he doesn’t like you, I owe you big time” he offered. 
“I don’t know if I should take that risk, though” you said, and he rolled his eyes playfully. 
“Do you really want it to be like this for the rest of highschool? God, if he doesn’t like you, you’ll just find someone better” 
Easier said than done. 
But maybe he was right. At the end of the day you had nothing to lose, so why not just tell him?
“Fine” you grumble, and he laughs, taking your hand to pull you out of the room, before any teacher finds you. 
_____
You had left a note in his locker the next day, too scared to face him yourself. 
You waited, hiding your body behind the huge column, peeking to see if he had come to grab something from his locker already.
You felt like one of his fangirls. Giggling to yourself, as you awaited the arrival of your mighty savior, Nishimura Riki, hoping you are the one he picks. Hoping that he reads your note, and whispers an ‘I like you too’ rosy cheeked, hot breath and all. 
How did you get like this? You curse yourself for letting something so seemingly small, so innocent, writhe under your skin and possess your mind. 
You didn’t catch it, lost in your mind, envisioning the numerous scenarios that could occur after he receives your note. 
He sighs with annoyance, a note filling his locker, it had been so long since he received one, it felt unfamiliar. Niki was frustrated, hoping that the notes weren’t making a sudden comeback. 
He opens it, curious as to what it may be. He couldn’t help it, wanting to remind himself of the feeling reading confessions like this brought him. But what he didn’t expect was to see your name written on it. 
He thought it may have been a prank, a stupid way to get you back together made up by your dear friends, but it wasn’t. This was your handwriting, the same one that wrote all his physics notes and study guides. 
‘Niki, it’s Y/n. This is weird isn’t it? Like me writing notes to you. I hope you don’t see the pink envelope, and throw it out like you always do. But I’ll know if you do, anyways. Well first of all I wanted to apologize. I don’t even know what for, so this may be stupid, but I feel like I should. You looked so sad, and I know it’s because of me. So I’m sorry, Niki. If I did something wrong, something to hurt you, please tell me! Anyways, I wanted to tell you something. I like you Nishimura Riki. I’ve liked you for a long, long time now, but I myself didn’t know it just yet. But I’m saying it now, and I'm very much sure of it. I guess it took some stupid physics tutoring, geeky Wonbin and finally Minjun whom you hate so much for me to realize. God, maybe I shouldn’t talk about him in a note where I confess to you? Forget it. I didn’t kiss you that day to show off, I kissed you because I really freaking wanted to. And it felt so good when I did. So please don’t think I ended things with you that day because you kissed me, no, not at all. I guess I just couldn’t stand this relationship being fake, because to me, all the things I did were real. You don’t have to reciprocate, or even say anything, I just wanted you to know. And I would hope you feel the same, but it’s okay if you don’t’ 
His mouth runs dry. 
It explodes in his chest all at once; how bad he wants to grab a fistfull of your blazer, stroke his fingers against your ivory jaw, and kiss you senseless. He would rub his thumb against your swollen lips, and tell you how much he likes you. 
He looks around, spotting your shoe slightly peeking out from behind the column a little ahead of the lockers. 
“Baek Y/n!” he shouts, and you're suddenly brought back to reality. 
Your mind had been rushing for so long, you didn’t even notice Niki walking up to his locker, and managing to even read the whole note. 
You slightly peek your head out, and catch his eyes already looking at you. He strides towards you quickly, and you can’t tell if he’s mad or happy. He holds the note in his hand tightly as he stands in front of you. 
“What is this?” he smirks, and you still can’t tell if he’s about to make fun of you or return your feelings. 
You shrug, looking away from him. 
“It’s cute. You even put those stickers we bought at the stationery store on it” he points out, chuckling, and grabs your hand so you can face him again. “What do you think I’ll say now?” he tilts his head, and you find it incredibly attractive. 
“I don’t know” you murmured, unsure of the situation you have gotten yourself into. 
“Let’s see” he scans the note again “I think I like you too” he smiles, and you don’t know if he’s fucking with you or not. 
“You think?” you ask, copying his action by tilting your head slightly. 
He laughs “Are you really going to make me say it?” 
You nod with a smile “Mmm” 
“Yes Y/n, I like you. I don’t think I like you, I definitely like you. I’ve also liked you for a long time, but I didn’t want to admit it because I knew you probably didn’t. And that day, when you ended things, I wanted to tell you. But I’m glad you did it, even if I had to wait a little longer. That fake relationship was fucking with my head big time” he answers, and you feel stupid for not letting him speak first that day. You could’ve avoided this whole misunderstanding. 
But things happen for a reason. 
“Are you being for real?” you ask, and he chuckles. 
He grabs your shoulders “Very real” 
You pull him closer, tightly embracing his body. He smiles, the familiar scent hitting his nose. Niki’s cheeks are glowing red, and he can’t hide his toothy smile. 
“So would you want to be my girlfriend, like my real girlfriend” he asks, his voice muffled by the material of your sweater. 
You laugh lightly at his tone “I don’t know…. You tell me” you tease, and he pulls away to look at you with a small pout. 
“Cmon, just tell me” he pleads. 
“Yes Niki, I want to be your real girlfriend” you answer, emphasizing the word ‘real’. 
Now you could finally enjoy him, and by the way your heart beat, this time you were certain it was real. 
1K notes · View notes
zeldasnotes · 7 months
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Astro Notes 30 🍂🍁
Check out my masterlists for more fun observations masterlist I, masterlist II and masterlist III 🎃
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🍂 People with Moon/Saturn & Moon/Pluto tend to keep people at arms lenght. Like no matter how well you know them there is a part of them you dont know.
🍂 People with Ceres(1) conjunct Ascendant, Sun or Moon might really enjoy being pregnant.
🍂 Paine(5188) in the 10th house = Painful situations in your life becoming public knowledge.
🍂 Capricorn Sun and Rising women have an odd mix between old and young. Its common for them to have a body that barely changes even tho they face change a lot with age or vice versa. Might have a babyface but a lot of wrinkles or mature looking face with very small body. For example Tara Reid, she looks young and old at the same time.
🍂 To everyone with Leo in the 7th house yall need to stop dating people who look up to you and start dating people you look up to. Ive seen people with this who gets into crazy situations bc they date people who want to steal their light etc.
🍂 Same with people who have 2nd house placements especially lilith. Go for people with the same economy or better economy than you. These placements attract envious people, leeches, unambitious people and users when they dont know their worth. People see how glamorous you are and they see what you have and they want a piece for themselves.
🍂 For some reason people with Libra Mars seems to be surrounded by aggressive people. Maybe because that makes them feel safe because they are so passive themselves. Having people around who can protect them? I dont know. I also see them go through a period in their life where they start a lot of fights with others because they are ashamed of how passive they are.
🍂 People with squares to their Sun can be VERY intimidating. Especially Lilith & Pluto.
🍂 Mars in the 8th house synastry can make you find eachothers name very hot.
🍂 People with Mercury conjunct Mars might enjoy arguing.
🍂 Pluto conjunct Ascendant in the Fama(408) Persona Chart: The bad bitch in town. Julie Cooper from the OC/Blair Waldorf energy. Known for being powerful and not to be messed with. ”This town is really only big enough for one manipulative bitch”.
🍂 People with Venus or Mars aspecting Neptune have a lot of people fantasizing about them. Especially the hard aspects.
🍂 With Venus conjunct Chiron, Paine(5188) & Nemesis(128) there is a huge risk of being betrayed by those you love the most.
🍂 When yall have Venus 10th house in the composite chart yall will look sooo good together.😍
🍂 Venus in Scorpio people have this Bonnie and Clyde fantasy from what Ive seen. They love the idea of being a ride or die for someone. This can make them easily manipulated into doing stuff for their partner.
🍂 So many Leo Midheaven men have that cocky bad boy image, especially those with Scorpio Rising. The darkness of the Scorpio Rising mixed with the cockiness and glamorous fashionsense of the Leo MC makes them irresistible.
🍂 People with Aquarius/11th house placements attract fame without trying. Especially when its Moon.
🍂 People with Aphrodite(1388) conjunct Mars tend to be blessed with gorgeous looks. Ive seen this aspect in some of the most gorgeous people ive seen.
🍂 Juno(3) conjunct Venus in synastry = Juno person views Venus as the ideal partner. ”I will marry her some day” kinda energy.
🍂 People with Juno(3) conjunct the angles tend to get married at a younger than average age & people with Ceres conjunct angles or planets tend to have their first child at a younger than average age.
🍂 Check out asteroid Child(4580) in your chart to see more about your potential future children. I saw Child in Gemini in the chart if a woman who actually had twins.
©️ 2023 Zeldas Notes
2K notes · View notes
ma1dita · 2 months
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play pretend
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a ‘partners in crime’ installment - luke castellan x dionysus!reader
words: 5.1k (holy shit)
summary: (established relationship…at the end of it lol) suggestive in nature but sfw , underage drinking what do you expect from a dionysus!kid, mentions of vomit The one where Mr. D catches you two in the act, but you and him aren't exactly together yet. Everyone knows you two are together except the both of you, apparently. It’s hard to not run away from something good. (luke castellan x dionysus!reader)
a/n: happy first i love you to you and luke! yall are together now! crazy! thanks for being patient during my lil vacay :)) its been a little over a month since i started the trouble!verse!! ilysm
(posted 2/23 betad by my one and only @mrsaluado )
There’s something you’ve always loved about mornings.
Waking up with the first rays of light peeking through your window, the sun’s arms stretched around your sleepy frame pressing warm, featherlike kisses across the expanse of your back.
It almost feels real. 
Apollo must be feeling generous today, the heat of a warm breath brushing against your neck, and your alarm sounding an awful lot like soft snores. You ought to get up and close the blinds; it’s too damn bright. But your weighted blanket feels immensely heavier this morning as it envelopes your senses—smelling of citrus, musk, and a tangible dream of last night that seems to have stayed in bed with you. As soon as you try to untangle your legs from below the covers, warmth presses you deeper into the mattress with a…familiar sigh.
Your eyes pop open.
Quick and calculated, your eyes survey the surroundings of your room—the mop of licorice tresses nestled against the crook of your neck, both of your clothes scattered on the floor, as well as the alarm clock and a few other things knocked off your nightstand from Luke’s enthusiasm. The quiet of the morning is quickly disrupted when you hear two pairs of little hands pounding on your door, and for a moment you wonder if this is one of those hyper-realistic dreams that you don’t want to wake up from.
“Sissy! You missed breakfast,” Pollux bellows as Castor continues to slap his palms on the wood like a bongo drum.
The sheets start rustling as you squirm out of Luke’s grasp, bumping against the muscular ridges of his torso which brings him back to consciousness.
“Be out in a minute!” you slur against his shoulder, and he opens his eyes blearily at the sight of you sprawled over him to try to reach the alarm clock on the ground. As his eyes focus he can’t help but admire the planes of your body, soft and pretty in the morning light like a painting come to life. Waking up in one’s company has never felt more right, even with the usual chatter of campers wafting through the open window. Here in the swaddle of pink and purple sheets, you two are something singular—not camp counselors with jobs to do, not demigods wanting to achieve glory, just your angelface and his trouble. 
It’s intimate, even if it doesn’t have a label, him and you.
His large hand catches you at the plush of your tummy when you almost topple off the bed.
“Shit. Shit! They’re not kidding—Luke, it’s 9:30!”
You fling yourself upwards and off of him, clambering to find clothes from your dresser and tossing him his from the day prior. His belt buckle almost hits him in the eye and he groans, flinching as it smacks him in the cheek.
“Gods, woman. You think camp will crumble because you slept in for once?” 
The glare you throw in his direction is his answer, so Luke slowly tugs his pants on–though he quickly gets distracted by a half-dressed vision of you rummaging around your room.
“Castellan.”
He grins like a little kid in a candy store, and to that, you throw his shoe at him. 
Idiot. 
Too bad you’re in deep shit for sleeping in.
“SISSY!!!” 
“IN A FUCKING MINUTE, THING ONE AND TWO!” 
Screaming at the closed door as you throw some shorts on, you spin around and bump into Luke who’s already got his hands around your waist as his nose nudges the space between your jaw and your neck.
“You were supposed to leave before daybreak,” you sigh, a smile creeping onto your lips, “if you did as you were told, I wouldn’t have slept in.” Fake annoyance leaks through your voice though he knows it not to be true, he wouldn’t be able to latch onto you like this if you were. His nose continues to graze up towards your ear as he presses a kiss behind it—like how you both deal with your feelings and the truth nowadays, a hidden secret kept for both of your eyes only.
“Dunno trouble…I can get used to waking up next to you,” he mumbles. You can feel the imprint of his smile searing into your skin.
Is this what going into cardiac arrest feels like? Genuine question.
You’ve both been sneaking around for the past few weeks, but neither of you has made anything official. They say it’s easier to fall for a friend rather than a stranger—to know someone so intimately (and now in more ways than one) should make falling the easy part. 
But that’s kind of the problem. 
Luke is your best friend—both knowing how the other feels from a single glance, so pray tell to all the gods on Olympus, why has this boy not asked you out yet? Whether this is all for fun or anything resembling a four-letter word that makes your brain go fuzzy, you think you’d rather swim in the Styx instead of putting yourself at a disadvantage. Love is scary, even if it’s Luke. 
Especially since it’s Luke.
His words make you stop in your tracks and you can hear your heart pounding in your ears, so you’re not dead… But the noise turns out to be one of the twins banging on the door again, and now you look like an asshole for taking too long to respond. Luke’s awkwardly looking at you now, tongue in cheek.
“Last warning,” one of your brothers teasingly croons, before the other continues, “Dad’s almost at the door! Your boyfriend’s gotta go or he’s dead…”
Your eyes widen in fear and Luke loosens his grip on your waist, unsure if you look like you’ve seen a ghost at the thought of him being called your boyfriend or the very real possibility of getting caught by your dad.
What a way to go, you two.
“Get out. You gotta go now, out the window!” 
You start pushing him towards the windowpane, your palms pressing against his marked-up and very bare back. 
Holy shit, he still doesn’t have a shirt and he looks like he got mauled by a hellhound. 
You can practically see the grapevines start to flourish outside your window. 
He’s too close for comfort, way too damn close, you think, but can’t reason if you mean Luke or your dad.
“Seriously?” 
He straddles the open window, and Luke doesn’t know what to feel about you pushing him away—it’s a feeling that’s foreign to him since he’s always by your side. 
“Sorry. I’ll make it up to you later angelface,” you mumble, pulling him in for a mind-numbing kiss that almost makes him slip off the rain gutter, and by the time you’ve already closed the window he realizes he’s shirtless in broad daylight, feet hopping off the siding of the cabin.
This couldn’t get any worse (oh but it does in a second), and you’re definitely the asshole this time around.
Your dad barges into your room by the time you throw a shirt on.
“Kid, what the hell? You sick?” 
Mr. D furrows his brows at the sight of you, face flushed as you simper up a lie about your head hurting. It’s weak for an excuse and even if you usually don’t have a tell—he’s the master of this game, so he pretends to not notice you chuck a shirt out the window when you open it to make it less stuffy. 
He raises an eyebrow in disapproval when you both notice your shirt is too big on you.
Oh, he’s onto you, applying heat like a brand to make his only daughter squirm; Mr. D peeks out the window to see a certain Luke Castellan stomping across the path wearing your cropped camp tee—and concludes that if there’s anyone in hot water right now, Luke must be drowning in it.
Acting natural is a bit harder for you today, and it feels like a cruel and unusual punishment worth the deepest pit of the Underworld as you scribble words onto a page that won’t even be comprehensible once you read them after this meeting is over. You’ve been catching up on work all day (also known as the impossible task of avoiding Luke) to show your dad you haven’t been slacking off. But a late start meant you fumbled through your day and it was obvious to everyone that you were off your game. Archery ran into javelin throwing, capture the flag teams weren’t ready and had to be made on the spot, there were no new shipments delivered to the camp store, and the infirmary ran out of ambrosia— which were all things that you were expected to coordinate.
Gods, you’re getting too old for this shit.
And if you, the head counselor everyone depends on, is off her game, well—everyone’s on edge. The Stolls even dared to ask you if the world was ending today and you were less than impressed.
Being in love sure feels like it is.
The only thing left to get through is this counselor’s meeting before the party tonight at Fireworks Beach, and you’ll damn yourself to Tartarus if you can’t even get that right. You’re a Dionysus kid, so partying is in your blood. Party planning is your favorite hobby, and to be real, you deserve a drink after today.
Speaking of your father, he’s jabbering on about something you find yourself not particularly interested in, but well…someone’s gotta listen. Charles is dozing off at the table, and Lee jabs him in the side. You see Silena braiding Clarisse’s hair out of the corner of your periphery. And of course, out of all of them, there’s Luke who’s been trying to steal your attention for the past 30 minutes. Black ink smears across the page as you find yourself having every thought that ends supplemented with the memory of how Luke looked at you as he climbed out of your window this morning.
Could he actually want more? 
The all-star camper, Luke Castellan— camp’s best soldier who’s envied by many and admired by all…wants to wake up next to you. You, the camp director’s daughter who keeps everyone in line and is seen more as authority instead of a person with feelings. You’re not always feared, but in a camp for demigod kids who’d rather hone their powers instead of lose special privileges for skipping class, you’re not exactly their favorite either. Once, someone said they’d rather face Mr. D instead of you.
“That doesn’t make sense, we’re supposed to send in the next progress report to Olympus before the last day of the month. That’s Wednesday, D. So it should be by the Sunday before,” you butt in after a statement your dad makes about scheduling. 
All eyes are on you now— it’s the first time you’ve spoken up during tonight’s meeting which was out of character in itself, but your father catches you off guard when the sound of his booming laughter spreads across the room like dynamite tearing through a battlefield.
“Says who? We’ve got enough time,” The god remarks, a strange sheen in his eyes that reflects into yours. He’s on your ass a bit more today, pointing out your flaws from the day and making it his mission to get on your nerves. Few mortals would undermine a god, and though you do it daily to spite him for your existence, your confidence is lower today than it usually is—the reason being a boy with amber eyes boring into your soul from across the table. Everything else pales in comparison now, almost fading into the background, and even here in the hot seat you can’t help but think about if Luke could ever fall for someone like you.
You’re venturing into dangerous territory, you tell yourself, you’ve been hurt before.
It hurts less somehow when you’re cautious. To prepare oneself to be hurt is a defense mechanism ingrained in you—your mom raised you to always be ready for anything. Your self-identity has always been skewed by others’ perceptions. Mirroring the memory of your late mother’s ideals, exemplifying your actions through your immortal father’s personality, you find that fighting your bloodline is one of the most difficult things to come to terms with. A thought passes in your brain that you’ve taken after the worst of them—your mother’s ambition and your father’s unpredictability. 
And who would want to love someone so difficult? 
Tough love is the only way you know how to love. Perhaps someone as good as Luke deserves better than this.
“It’ll be less to worry about that way,” you swallow, and the other counselors sit back in their seats as tension fills the air, signaling another disagreement about to start between your father and you.
“Good thing you don’t have to worry about it since it’s my job, right, kid? Just because you woke up on the wrong side of the bed today doesn’t mean you can change things to better fit your schedule instead of the rest of ours.”
Mr. D scowls, and then again maybe you’re too much like your father—too brash, too mouthy, and self-serving, and your eyes meet Luke’s again as your mouth pulls into a bitter smile.
“It’s the first and last time it’ll ever happen. Gods know I don’t get sick days around here picking up after you,” you spit out harshly, words coming out like acid.
“Just saying kid. Haven’t seen you this careless in years— Maybe check yourself before telling us what to do, yeah?”
Your father’s words have a double meaning as he stares into your soul, glancing between you and Luke, who is none the wiser, still focused on you. Annabeth is holding his hand under the table as you watch his jaw flex. He can see right through the shoddy performance you put on of having it all together.
Does everyone know? 
Your lips pucker as you roll your neck from locking, and a humorless laugh slips from you. Everyone else’s eyes are on Luke, who looks like he’s about to jump across the table and wring a god’s neck. 
Fuck. 
“Whatever. I’m not doing this today,” you grumble, feeling overwhelmed. The chair screeches against the wood of the floor as you push yourself up, fists stained with ink and clenched in teenage angst as you walk to the door to make a quick escape. 
Your father crosses his arms smugly at the success of getting under your skin, and the last words you hear as you leave are, “You never want to hear the truth, kid. Must you always be so…. you?”
Your steps falter for a moment, feeling heavier knowing he’s right so you let go of the door to let it slam it behind you. There’s a commotion inside after you leave but you couldn’t be bothered to give a damn. It’s time to party and you’re sure as hell getting drunk, high, or both tonight.
It takes about two cups of wine for the inebriation to start kicking into Luke’s system. He’d never been much of a drinker, but with the way you’re throwing your head back at Lee’s jokes as he plays the guitar, he thinks he should drink a bit more to forget the fear in your eyes this morning and how Lee keeps touching your waist.
He’s been suspended from counselor duties for the rest of the month for mouthing off at Mr. D in your defense, and even if Annabeth tells him he’s lucky to have not met a worse fate, the way things played out today makes him feel like the most unlucky guy at camp. Fuck the gods, or at least…fuck your dads (that doesn’t sound right, but he’s too busy watching the moonlight glint against your skin that whatever his ex is whispering next to him goes in one ear and out the other). 
“Lukey?” Skye mumbles against his neck, “I miss you…you’re always busy doing who knows what!”
Well… she has a name, Luke thinks, taking a big gulp of whatever’s left in his cup as his eyes follow you across the beach. You’re dancing around the bonfire spinning a tipsy Clarisse who laughs without a care in the world. He thinks you’re the best of your parents—determined to achieve your goals, selfless when it comes to others’ needs, and passionate about what you want. Mr. D will never get to see this side of you—the one you show your friends and this place you all call home. He’ll never be deserving of the work you put into Camp Half-Blood (and to some extent, Luke knows he doesn’t deserve you either).
A dejected sigh brushes warm air against his shoulder.
“You know, Castellan. I wish I met you first,” the blond daughter of Athena slurs with tears forming in her eyes.
“What are you talking about?”
“The two of you have always… it’s always been you and her. Even if you both don’t want to admit it. It’s not fair,” she hiccups. Luke pulls the cup out of his ex-lover’s hand and she shakes her head.
“Skye, you’re drunk. I’ll take you back to 6.”
“You really don’t see it do you?” Her hands grapple onto Luke’s shirt like she’s pulling him down and pleading for him to understand.
“That girl is in love with you. The both of you are meant for each other—and you’re both spending too much time trying to fight fate. The rest of us aren’t as lucky, but we sure as hell aren’t stupid.”
There’s a moment of clarity that hits as he looks into Skye’s eyes, and he scratches the back of his neck.
“You don’t mean that.”
“I meant what I said when we broke up a few years ago. You’re both always looking for each other, even if you don’t know it. Just meet in the middle already, for gods’ sake…I’ll be okay,” she sighs, sitting up on the log they were resting on. 
“Your girlfriend is sure as hell to give me a hangover worth her title of being Dionysus’ kid in the morning anyways,” she mutters, kissing Luke on his cheek as a farewell. But out of all of the things to catch your attention that night, Luke’s blush glows in the light of the fire, and he watches you frown and stomp off toward the forest.
For being the son of the god of luck, his dad really won’t give him a break.
It didn’t help that Skye suddenly started projectile vomiting seconds after you left (off of her only cup of wine; wonder how that happened).
Luke fights through his growing intoxication on the walk back towards the cabins, but boy are you difficult when you’re angry—you’ve always had a profound effect on his being, even more so with your powers. He makes a wrong turn somewhere through the woods, completely missing the cabins, which he doesn’t realize until he stumbles across the path leading to the Big House. When his eyes focus, he spots Mr. D sipping on a glass as he leans on the railing of the front porch. Be calm and don’t act drunk, Luke tells himself, but all of his concentration goes into not swaying in front of the god of wine that he can’t stop the words from coming out of his mouth.
“Good evening, um…sir.”
“Kid, it’s 3 in the morning. What the hell are you doing here? Gods know it’s not my window you’re trying to climb up. You’re a bit of a ways off.”
Now what the fuck was he supposed to say to that?
Luke freezes in his spot (in reality he bumps into the first wooden step and sticks a hand out to steady himself against the railing).
“Are you drunk?”
Mr. D looks at him knowingly like it’s almost funny to him, eyebrows furrowed and head quirked like he can sniff it off of him. He probably can, now that Luke thinks really hard about it.
“I’m not gonna answer that because I think you know the answer already,” the son of Hermes words carefully, but nothing smart can come of this. It’s like playing chess with checkers, and Dionysus of all gods would know—no breathalyzer needed.
There’s a beat of silence, before Mr. D says, “I’m gonna give you another chance to–”
“Yes, I’m drunk, but it’s not trouble’s fault—it’s mine!” he blabbers, walking closer to your father. 
“She’s mad at me for defending her from you earlier besides the fact I act stupid around her and I only had a few cups, I swear, but she’s…your daughter is…extraordinary.”
“What?”
“Your daughter makes me feel drunk, sir. Even without the wine. I don’t know what to do with myself, just please don’t get mad at her. She has a lot more to lose…” He feels pathetic in all sense of the word, rubbing at his eyes until Mr. D snaps his fingers and the alcohol blanket lifts from his senses. Like a bucket of cold water splashed onto his spine, Luke is suddenly very awake, and all too embarrassed for the waterfall of words he’s told your father.
“Oh.”
“I didn’t know she knew how to do that yet. She’s learning quickly.” Mr. D looks out into the distance, the dim light of the cabins acting like a beacon of light in the middle of the campgrounds.
Luke wrings his hands, picking at his thumbs and he’s sure he’s about to get kicked out of camp for his behavior, much less the fact that he’s been fraternizing with the director’s daughter.
“Sometimes I think she knows too much.” He licks his lips, awkwardly standing next to the god and wondering if the dark liquid in his cup is wine.
“Do you think I don’t know that, Luke? Do you really think I don’t know about the parties? I let her have her fun too you know— I'm the one that keeps Chiron asleep. She doesn’t ask for much. I know I give her a hard time. I’m just….” 
There are a few things about Mr. D’s statement that surprise Luke: the fact that he actually knows his name, how he safeguards his daughter’s interests, and the possibility of a god actually knowing how to be a good parent. 
It still doesn’t take away from the countless times he’s seen you put yourself down because of your father, the inadequacy you feel from the responsibilities you take on, and how you’d do anything for simple applause. Tough love is still love with a heavy hand. And it leaves bruises, whether he meant it or not.
“Is that why you’ve never sent her on an actual quest? We all know picking up the twins doesn’t count in the grand scheme of things.”
“For what? To achieve glory? Recognition? I never understood why we Olympians do that. Send children off to their deaths to deserve a moment of their godrent’s time, or a gift to shut them up. I don’t need her to be a hero, she doesn’t have anything she needs to prove to me. I need her to be my daughter, and preferably alive. That’s enough for me.”
Luke takes a step back in disbelief. There’s something in his being that yearns to be loved like that, without having to prove it or needing to deserve it. It hurts almost, the way he wants to be loved like your family loves you. Your father, an Olympian, standing in front of him telling him that your existence is enough to be worthy of his presence. In the silence that follows, Luke wonders if he’ll ever have that.
“You should tell her that more often, sir.”
“Listen. She’s a good kid, I just give her a hard time because it’s hard to get attached to you mortals. Your lives are so short compared to the infinite timeline I live. I can do everything in my power to try to keep her safe, but I can’t stop her from leaving. So don’t blame me if I act like an asshole if it’ll keep her here for a bit longer. I’ll take all the time I can get.”
“Then how do I tell her I love her with without either of us running away?”
Mr. D laughs loudly now, his wrinkles crinkling as liquid sloshes out of his cup. It turns out to be grape juice you left out for him before the party.
“Mortals always busy themselves with trivial things, like pride and sorrow. Pandora’s box left you humans with nothing but hope. I say you swallow the negative and just say it how it is. You’ll have a lot more time being happier together that way. I already lost my bet against some of the counselors anyway.”
“What bet?”
Your dad swats at Luke like he’s a dog to kick, and tosses his glass over his shoulder where it disappears in the night air.
“Get off my porch Castellan, and just know if you hurt her…” 
“I’d die before that happens, sir.”
“That would hurt her most of all. Think about what that means. For gods’ sake she’s left her light on for you, so go on before I set the harpies on you. And don’t call me sir, it freaks me out. You’re still not special to me.” Mr. D stalks back inside the Big House, and Luke takes that as his cue to leave. The cold night air pushes him back towards the cabins, the light in your window luring him in like a ship lost at sea.
“I know you’re still awake, trouble.”
You hear him move closer to the bed as you keep your eyes shut, evening out your breaths, but you’re never able to hide anything from Luke anymore.
“I thought I closed that window,” you mumble, turning your face more towards your pillow.
“You didn’t.”
Of course, you didn’t. You were hoping he’d chase after you this time around, even if you made him drunk in more ways than one.
“Skye keep you busy?” you say nonchalantly, and you hear Luke laugh as he tugs your duvet off of you.
“Your dad did, actually,” he says grinning, watching your eyes pop open in confusion as you turn and face him, propping yourself up on your knees.
“What the fuck?”
“You could’ve gotten me kicked out y’know? Stumbled onto his porch telling him about how drunk you make me feel even without a drop of alcohol and how I don’t know what the fuck to do with myself when I’m around you.”
“You shouldn’t be so brave to fight gods like that for me. Even if it’s my dad, Castellan,” you whisper, and he kneels next to your bed so he can look at you in the eyes from an equal standpoint. Because that’s what the two of you are— equal, singular, one and the same. And he’s never made you feel less than, even if your brain tries to convince you of it.
“Stop that,” he scoffs, shaking his head as he grabs your hands, “stop calling me my last name like it detaches you from how you feel about me. I want you to stop pretending when it's just you and me,” he pleads, whispering your name so softly that the sound of it brushes against your lips.
There’s something more intimate in the way he looks at you now compared to when you were naked and nestled against him this past morning. The act of knowing that it’s you and him, no matter how hard you try to fight it.
His knuckle brushes against your jaw, pushing your eyes to look back into his, and you can’t deny him any longer.
“Hey. I love you, and I know you feel the same; I'm tired of you acting like you're not and I’m going crazy he—”
His words are halted by your lips surging forward to meet him in the middle. The culmination of years of friendship has brought you to this special moment frozen in time, and sure, demigods die young but this must be what he’ll see in Elysium. If there’s a single memory he can bring with him to his next life, he hopes it’s this one—the taste of you and how it feels to be loved like this, without question or reason. You pull away with a sweet smile and he feels drunk again.
“You’re my best friend, angelface,” you mumble.
Okay, now that sobered him up faster than it should have.
Luke stiffens, his hands falling to your thighs as he starts to ramble, “If you’re actually friendzoning me right now I might just roll out of your window and feed myself to a harpy.”
The laugh that comes out of you booms across the room as you wrap your arms around him with a radiant smile. You always have so much to say, but right now only three words come to mind. Five vowels, three consonants, and the gravity of it pushes out of your mouth like there’s no better truth to tell.
“I love you. I think I’ve been in love with you even before I liked you and I’m sorry I’ve been too scared to say it. I’m not used to…”
Luke sighs in relief, as he presses his scarred cheek against your shoulder. 
“You think I’m not scared of us either, trouble? I worship the ground you walk on, and everyone can see that.”
“Well I’m not a god, Luke,” you say tugging him up by his mop of curls as your legs wrap around him.
“Sometimes when I’m with you, I think you’re the closest thing to it,” he whispers, pulling your chin down for another kiss until you both get your fill. He thinks he can kiss you forever until the end of your short lives, until it’s senseless and maddening, like falling into a drunken stupor. Loving you is an experience he’ll never be able to rid himself of, heart stained with the best of you until both your fingertips are red and raw with the feeling.
You pull him back into your bed as your giggles fill the early morning air. He’s quickly becoming what you love most about waking up in the morning.
Chris Rodriguez wakes up to the sound of the morning birds and chattering children in the busy cabin 11. As he rubs at his eyes, ready to take on the day as an interim cabin counselor for the rest of the month because of Luke’s suspension, sunlight falls onto the one empty bunk in the corner of the room (Fact: There is never an empty bed in the Hermes cabin. Also a fact: he and Chiron will be able to cash in against the other counselors as fast as his feet can take him to the Big House).
“To love someone is firstly to confess; I’m prepared to be devastated by you.” Billy Ray Belcourt
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chrollohearttags · 6 months
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kinktoberfest • lactation/pregnancy
character: armin artlert
show: attack on titan
word count: 1.1K
content + themes: nipple play, missionary, praise kink, finger sucking, squirting, calls reader mama, daddy’s used, crying (not dacryphilia), breeding
📝: I truly underestimated how hard it was to keep a drabble under 2K words yet how much work they are. Posting every day isn’t realistic but I still got yall! 🫶🏾
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they say that pregnancy for some is an extremely difficult time..the weight gain, the insecurity that comes along with it and the amount of pain sometimes isn’t worth it. Not to mention the weird cravings some develop. But for others…others have the time of their lives. They get told they’re glowing, that they radiate beauty and that bringing a new life into this world was a wonderful thing. You, fortunately, were on the latter end and were enjoying every second of it. Being a new mom for the first time was frightening but your loving, doting man was more than happy to help ease any discomfort. But that wasn’t the only thing he was willing to lend a hand with…
“Oh my gosh…right there. Please, you’re in my spot, baby. Don’t stop!”
“I know, I know…but I gotta slow down. We don’t wanna hurt the baby, angel.”
a soothing, cooing voice responding to you during what could only be described as passionate, raw..amazing sex. The very same love making that had landed you up in this predicament in the first place! A night of heavy drinking and fucking between a wife who despised protection and a husband who had an insatiable breeding kink. It was only a matter of time before the man you married only three years prior and had been in love with you since high school, Armin Artlert..would knock you up. He constantly talked about how he wanted to get you pregnant. How beautiful you’d look with his baby inside of you and that he’d ensure you never had to lift a finger to do a thing as long as you had him. After all, regardless of whether you bared his child or not, you were going to be his spoiled princess. A kept woman, deserving of a soft and easy life; who’s biggest decision of the day would be if you took the Benz Truck or the Audi to brunch with your girls. Any and everything you’ve ever desired was yours..sometimes you didn’t even need to ask. That’s why you felt zero qualms about carrying his kid. But it was once you were pregnant, did those intense feelings and sweet gestures increase tenfold. Especially sexually..he truly couldn’t keep his hands off of you! So you’d find yourself surrounded by rose petals on a soft, plush mattress. One he had prepared just for you.
“Armie..you’re not gonna hurt me, promise. The doctor said it was fine. So please—haaaa! Keep going.”
“Whatever you want, angel..I’ll give it to you..give you all this dick—fuck!”
your shrill voice cried out, pleading with your husband to continue pounding your pussy. At the moment, he had your legs pinned as far as they could withstand..surprisingly almost behind your head with his fingertips kneaded into your supple tits. They were swollen with perfectly erect nipples; they were so beautiful..so much so, he had teased them for nearly an hour whilst fingerfucking you on the couch. His lips latched around the swollen buds..gently mashing and massaging that sensitive flesh to drum up the one thing he craved more than anything. Which was to see them lactating. You had a preconceived notion that only women who had already given birth could do that but you were proven wrong when he began to squeeze at those nipples, gently suckling and rubbing circular patters on them with his thumbs. A few moments later, he felt a dampness underneath and was shocked to find that you began to emit milk… “oh fuck..that’s so sexy..” continuing his little onslaught on your breasts. He was enamored at this point and couldn’t get enough. Fast forward and his fingertips were back on them, working as a guide as he thrashed his cock around inside of you. “Mmmmph!! Arminnnn…” slamming it into that fertile little cunt. “My pretty baby…doing so fucking good f’r me. Taking daddy’s dick like this..fuck, I’m so proud of you.” The thought of breeding you once more, despite already being pregnant, was getting him incredibly aroused! Those icy blue eyes peering down at you with absolute adoration..
“You want me to nut in that pretty pussy, mama? Get you so full all over again?…fuck…you’d like that, huh?” The answer was already a given, apparent by how tight you were squeezing him and the tears streaming down your puffy cheeks. “Yes, daddy! Keep fucking me right there—shit!” You were so cute, he couldn’t help himself! Just as he posed his question, you’d whimper yet again when another stream of that translucent liquid came spouting from your nipples, which he’d swiftly swoop down to catch the remnants of in his mouth. “That’s ittt! Good girl…” simultaneously, sending you into hysterics as you squirm underneath him. To reward you, his thumb would glide in between those lips and you’d gently suckle them as a way to pacify your cries. That round belly bouncing against his pelvis with each smacking stroke..along with a membrane of silky slick. “You’re so wet, baby. ‘Feel so good on my dick…I love it.” Bringing forth absolute delirium from your man. He couldn’t hold out much longer and he damn sure couldn’t hold back. Not when you sucked him into those fleshy walls as if it were nothing…as if you never wanted him to leave it.
“I’m coming, baby..oh my God.. ‘m so close..wanna come in your pussy, please.” Those pathetic whimpers followed by his hand clutching the headboard. Your legs began to tremble from the immense pressure. Both of you shaking and whimpering; bated breaths leaving both of your mouths. Hovering over you, Armin huffed and cried out, urging you to release first. Reluctantly halting in his tracks after pushing him away. Suddenly, he’d be met with a shower of sweet nectar, raining down his abs. It was obvious that you couldn’t take another second so he’d clutch your calves and pin them back, feeding you a couple more sharp strokes just before he reached the end of his own stride and before you knew it…
“Ohhhh fuuuck..oh my God.” That voice rising in pitch as he allowed his throbbing cock be milked for all its worth and those heavy balls be drained and devoid of every bit of that nut. Slowly pulling out and watching his seed spill along with it..he’d soon after collapse to your side and gently sandwich your head between his hands.
“I love you so much. I’m so glad you’re having my baby.”
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hotdogdynamitezzz · 1 year
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Spicy Astro Observations 18+
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This is really just a filler post for my december schedule because the content I've promised has taken so long to write on and off between my finals. I'd like to thank college for these notes, enjoy ig 💘
🌶 Libra Mars are actually quite dominant in bed, it’s so unexpected but I think they’re so good with dirty talk they just naturally know how to control a situation. Degrading others in bed oddly turns them on? for such a sweet sign I think they let their crazy and angry side loose in the bedroom as they always appear sweet and professional in every other space. Very much so lady in the streets freak in the sheets if you will.
💘 A Libra venus will want princess treatment in bed tho, they are the ones wanting to be taken care of and pleased 10000% they also wear the best lingerie hands down. You say one out of pocket thing and they are gone yall, although they like to be experimental! So switch it up.
🌶 Leo mars can sometimes be too controlling or demanding in bed, same with the moon in 8th house men I’ve noticed. In general, sex is lowkey overhyped with fixed-sign men because a lot of them just tell you what to do and order you around, which could be your vibe if you’re hella sub. But if you’re a dom the fixed sign men I’d go for are Scorpio venus & Aquarius moons. They like to be dominated from what I’ve noticed and are open to experimenting.
💘 Those who want to be treated like a princess and praised are libra + leo placements. Basically they have a praise kink lmao.
🌶 Uranus aspecting the ascendant or 7th house in any way usually is an indicator the individual is more open to polyamorous relationships or experimentation from what I’ve seen. it doesn’t always have to be uranus aspecting venus or mars but because the Ascendant - Descendant axis represents our perspective of the world and how others view us, I have noticed they are more open to the lgtbq+ community.
💘 Neptune in the 5th house people are definitely subs from what I’ve seen, they like to be taken care of and edged on until they cry LMFAO but they prefer some element of fantasy and a lot of foreplay to really engage them and turn them on or else it’s just not happening. You need to take them to another realm babes. Also highkey squirters
🌶 Venus/Moon aspecting Neptune in a 0 - 4° orb is also kinda known for squirting.
💘 Venus square Jupiter people and their sex drive is..scary 💀 Honestly they struggle to control their sex drive, these mf’s cannot go a week without sex it’s too hard for them. They find desire and indulge in it a lot, they also love sensual activities and games in bed. Usually there’s an element of power play involved and don’t forget to body worship them lmaoo. I actually see the individuals prefer being doms as well.
🌶 Aries venus men ARE NOT DOMS TBH it shocked me because Aries is the most masculine sign, but venus in a mans chart represents what they look for in women, what will turn them on and such. Therefore, they tend to favour bolder and more dominant women who make the first moves. I've heard a lot of them talking about how their DREAM is to get pushed against a locker by a hot girl and she makes out with them😭💀 - thanks college gossip.
💘 Scorpio & Capricorn mars is all about that BDSM sorry not sorry...same goes for Mars square Uranus which is funny, they like to fight their way to freedom ig lol? Also include Saturn - Mars as Saturn rules over chains & bondage.
^ most likely Capricorn mars likes to be tied up while Scorpio mars likes to be the one in control and tying the person up.
🌶 We know the mercurial signs are great at oral, but PISCES AND SCORPIOS compete for the oral queens and kings title too omg. Scorpio rules the genitals while pisces rules over liquids so...you can see how this plays out HAHA. Pisces can also just drive you over the edge easily? scorpio likes to drag it out while pisces prefers to deliver a fantasy.
💘 Virgo venus people are NOT as innocent as they seem. They LOVE degradation and being sub af, the sign that serves? yeah they gonna do whatever it takes to get you off bae and thoroughly enjoy the process. THEY PAY ATTENTION TO DETAILS TOO! if they find something that turns you on they will be sure to explore it more. Every virgo venus/mars person gives off hot librarian vibes and you just know a lot of them are kinky lol
🌶 Taurus venus is more vanilla but in a sensual and indulgent fashiom as they wanna be comfy and cute while fully embracing pleasure. Most likely they prefer to be taken care of in bed, sucking on their throat is their biggest turn on. They are extremely romantic, the type to get the mood going and prepare roses on the bed. They like things simple and hot because they know what they want.
💘 Leo & Scorpio placements shaking hands on their creampie and corruption kinks help omg LOL. Nothing turns a leo on more than stroking their ego with knowing they’re your first, they get on a power trip fr. As luminaries, they just like knowing they have the effect to influence you. It's always Leo Moon or Mars I've seen this with
🌶 As for Scorpios corruption & creampie kink I've noticed Scorpios are really into wholesome or innocent people? Just completely opposite of their darker personalities. Wanting to ruin someone turns thems on a lot because scorpio rules over power imbalance so Ig thats why. Scorpio also rules over regeneration, life & death so creampies kinda fits in the birth category yknow
💘 Cancer placements also have a weird tendency to be complete doms or subs and nothing in between, they like to give orders which I find funny because it is so not associated with their stereotypes. But in general the sweet zodiac signs ARE REALLY KINKY FOR SOME REASON. 
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🌶 Aquarius mars and public sex is actually insane, and the rumours are true a lot of aqua moons I’ve met fantasize about threesomes and orgies. They’re just as much into voyeurism as Sagittarius mars is.
💘 Aquarius Mars also LOVES sex toys, especially vibrators. They literally act like they gonna perform a scientific experiment on your pussy help I can’t
🌶 Every pisces sun man I’ve met is straight up addicted to porn, idc if anyone thinks they’re innocent and cute. THEY HAVE PROBLEMS LMAOO.
💘 A lot of sagittarius mars women I’ve met are doms and love body worship, i think body worship is definitely connected to Jupiter as Zeus is associated with that planet. So y’know, treat them like a god and you will be rewarded lol.
🌶 Speaking of which, Sagittarius rising women are just the most fun people ever, in and out of the bedroom you will literally never get bored they are so funny and cool. I simp for them fr
💘 Neptune or Pisces in the 5th house could be into LSD or acid trips while they have sex, they prefer to use alcohol or some form of substance to lessen their anxiety, they could also highkey be sex addicts as the 5th house is our hobbies and entertainment.
🌶 Mars & Pluto in the 5th house LOVE angry sex, they are the people who have makeup and breakup sex the most I swear, they relieve their stress by having sex.
💘 Those with Gemini/Virgo/Mercury in the 8th house could like handcuffs a lot. I know a girl with this that has a kink for having her hands cuffed and not being able to see.
🌶 If you’re crushing on a Scorpio placement, just make them laugh and get them a little jealous. They will get obsessed, I feel like this is why they tend to have relationships with Geminis so often? because Geminis know how to rile people up, crack a joke or two, and seem unbothered in the process. I have never known a Scorpio venus to be into someone without getting jealous first oops-
💘 Mars in the 6th house is a secret man whore placement, they don’t seem like fuckboys but they use physical activity for their mental health and most often I’ve noticed their way of healing is through sex, and more sex PFFT. 
🌶 12th house stelliums and their fantasies of a person that doesn’t even know they exist lol. To get their attention just randomly pop up to help them once in a while but not too often so they feel special but are curious about you. Doing little things for them yet keeping the mystery and suspense of a crush alive is what keeps them fantasizing tbh.
💘 It’s why 12th house people love virgo placements so much, because virgos always randomly appear to help a pisces/12th house person. While on the other hand the pisces/12th house person devotes themselves and their personal time completely because they can’t see boundaries. It’s cute but I fear for y’all seriously 😀 get some boundaries plz
💘 Scorpio moons please avoid sagittarius & gemini moons at all costs until they’ve matured because a sag moon gets bored easily, moves on, will honestly ghost, and loves to not notify anyone. I know how anxious and paranoid scorpio moons can get and honestly a sag or gemini moon will only worsen your fears and trauma. Everytime I've seen this combination it's ALWAYS the gemini or sag moon leaving the scorpio moon heartbroken and ghosted 🥲
🌶 Sagittarius moons are free spirits, they cannot be tied down but they aren't always cheaters. I'd say their non-committal style differs from gemini in the sense that it will take A LOT to actually get into a relationship with a sag moon and once they're in its unlikely they cheat. While Gemini moons do get bored easily and jump into relationships so they seem to talk to other people and could perhaps cheat.
💘 Scorpio moons will say bs to get you in bed, they are sweet talkers and kinda act like fboys if they're not that into you so just beware. But so will many other moon signs like gemini, pisces & libra lol. It's not always but, these are the fuckboy moon signs from my experiences that will get you attached first.
But their game is good, worth it imo 👌
🌶 Pisces moons are SOO attentive in the bedroom, they will provide everything you want and make you feel so special it’s impossible to not become emotionally attached after you’ve done the deed tbh.
💘 I've noticed people with Saturn, Jupiter or Mars in their 8th House like it rough to the point of begging, they literally wanna see their partner crumble underneath them I’m not even joking...they also are really horny 24/7 because with mars in the 8th house they just have the desire for sex and release tension through it, same with Mars in 5th house. While Jupiter & Saturn can point to difficulties with controlling their sex drive, it’s either wayy too much or they’re celibate for a year. Very all or nothing type of people.
🌶 Leo placements literally wanna be caught fucking someone, again I’M NOT KIDDING they like to be shown off and know other people want them too, very similar to Aquarius mars and gets horny off of anything that feeds their ego tbh. 
💘 Mercury conjunct Venus/Mars people think about sex so much they get horny easily, they are actually the most under-rated horny placement. They don’t just sweet talk or dirty talk their way into your pants but they seem to have a lot of wet dreams and really be into having sex while performing another mental task like video games or smth. Yall secretly so freaky huh 😀
🌶 Venus/Moon in your 12th house makes you wet 24/7 it's like the ocean which is a very 12th house theme. For men it would be their Mars in 12th house. They're horny 24/7 I swear it's actually concerning.
💘 It's kinda hard to get a capricorn mars person turned on, it takes a lot of effort but they can last a while so it's worth it ig. But foreplay is gonna be a while okay, they like to take their time.
🌶 Mars & Mercury in 3rd/5th house people get bored easily during sex so make it competitive and include fun games. They also are the type to flirt with someone out of spite and play mind games. Not always again but- its never dull. They love the drama aspect in relationships tbh, it has to be passionate and fun or they don't fw you.
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lavishlyleo · 5 months
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Astrology Observations 5
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One thing I've noticed with Gemini Moons is that while they do love to talk to people and share their thoughts, if they aren't interested in the conversation's topic or if you stay on one topic for too long, they tend to zone out. If they aren't very invested in the convo at hand it will be VERY noticeable (e.g. blank stares, they suddenly go very quiet, dry repetitive responses, checking their phone frequently).
The same can be said for individuals with a lot of Air in their charts in general, especially Gemini and Libra. It can be hard to keep these individuals attention for prolonged periods of time. They like to cut to the interesting part so keep what you have to say very brief and to the point.
Not something Leo Moons are known for, but that I've noticed is that they can be really good at analyzing peoples behavior. Like, they'll see how someone acts and can make connections to their own behavior to understand some elses emotions and feelings. It's how many Leo Moons relate to people, bonus points if their Moon is in a water house!
In your Natal chart, if your ruling planet 's transit is in opposition or square with your natal ruling planet's sign, it can indicate a period of bad luck and hardship. It may feel like the world is against you at the moment, especially if said aspect is in a less than 5° orb. Not a great transit aspect to have.
For example, My ruling planet is Jupiter (Sag Rising) and it's in Scorpio at 9°. IRONICALLY ENOUGH, in my Solar Return chart for this year, Jupiter is in Taurus at 9°. So I'm expecting a lot to happen this year. Later on this year I'll make an update on this aspect.
If you have Scorpio or Pisces in your SR top 3 this year, don't take this lightly!! Like I said in my last post with manifestations, this will be a year that your manifestation power is at an all time high! You may literally speak things into existence, for better or for worse.
On the topic of Scorpio/Pisces SR top three, my advice for this (and I'm speaking from experience) is try to think about things you want to happen, not things you don't want or like. For example, if you think about how much you don't like a certain person, later on down the line you may find yourself suddenly coming back in contact with that person a lot more, when either you wanted to or not.
People with Cancer personal placements, I'd advise you to frequently check the Moon's transit and positions! Whenever it's the full or new moon, keep tabs on what happens those days and how you feel. Let me know in the comments anything interesting that's happened to yall during those times!
I've said this once and I'll say it again, Scorpio Mars are some of the most PERSISTENT people I've ever seen. When it comes to their desires, NOTHING stands in their way. However this can be detrimental if it's bad habits like drinking, smoking, stealing, ect. One way or another they will get what they want, even if it costs them everything. These people can truly be the victim of their own desires. Honorary mention- Taurus and Leo Mars.
Listen, if you ever need someone to promote your music, call an Aquarius Venus/Dominant person. I swear to god these people listen to the most obscure, outta pocket things I've ever heard.
Taurus 6th/5th housers tend to be those people at work that live by the slow and steady motto. They don't like to rush and do a sloppy job on whatever their working on.
On the other hand, Aries 6th/5th housers may be very fast workers, and it usually works well for them, works well under pressure. not the most thorough people but for the most part they get the job done.
People with a lot of Gemini and Leo placements in their chart tend to give off Aries energy.
Capricorn and Scorpio relationships are literally ride or die. I know a couple with many of these placements and they are so possessive of each other. Even after heated arguments and many hardships, they always come back together and work out their issues, it's really sweet!
When in an awkward situation, Libra Risings tend to try and break the tension first. Sometimes they can make the situation more awkward doing this but they're always the ones to bring the vibes back to the way they were, so I appreciate it. Gemini Risings may also do this but can be slightly more unhinged in their methods. I love both regardless for it😭💕.
The reason puberty for all of us hits hard is because it's around this time that Saturn is usually in the sign opposite from our Saturn sign. It makes a lot of sense when you think about it, itcchanges a lot of what we focus on and introduces us to new struggles. Although with Saturn retrograde, the age of which these changes can affect us can range from 13 all the way up to 25. Saturn is trying to toughen us up before we become adults.
What your Rising Sign's season is may be the season/months you prefer. For example, I'm a Sagittarius Rising and I tend to like late fall/early winter.
Your Moon sign can show how you process not just your emotions, but how you handle other peoples emotions, and how you relate to them. For example, a Leo Moon may relate to others by thinking of themselves in someone elses shoes, and how they would handle situations. While a Gemini Moon may relate other peoples emotions with stories from others that they've heard, and use what they've observed from other people to help others.
Venus PC Moon can also show this, I'd look at both sign's relationship to see the full picture of how one truly processes theirs and others emotions.
Moon/Pluto Aspects in someone's chart can show a relationship where however the mother treats the native, is how the native will end up treating her as they get older. For example, if the mother was negligent to the native in their younger years, then as they get older they will have a detached and impersonal attitude towards her. Basically the natives mirror how they were nurtured in youth.
"She say do you love me, I tell her only partly. I only love my bed and my mama I'm sorry." -Drake, a Cancer Moon.
People who say Gemini/Libra placements are indecisive have CLEARLY never met someone with many personal fire placements, especially if it's their top 3. Fire sign energy is naturally high and can be all over the place sometimes, this can include their thoughts and decision making as well, mostly concerning the direction of their passions and work. They may have a million ideas of what they're about to do but have trouble slowing down and planning it all out into managable chunks at a time. Will fight for what they want but may have trouble picking their battles wisely.
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HEY HEY, new post! I actually had this one in the drafts for awhile! I just got around to posting it now! I haven't been on at all lately because I'm having trouble finding what else to post about. Sooo I'm thinking of doing a little zodiac game soon since I want to practice my art more :] .
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More Nitro Nexus art!! I'm not sure when I'll be officially starting my Anthro's Anthem series with him but if I'm being honest I probably won't be releasing the first official chapter until like 2025-2026. I have a lot planned for it but I don't know when I'll get around to it. Only time will tell!
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misslovasstuff · 7 months
Text
“Something else”
Sanji x reader
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summary: after a long day, you and your boyfriend find yourselves comforting each other. Soon that comforting turns into something else.
Tags/warnings: opla!Sanji x fem!reader, suggestive nsfw language, unprotected sex, sexual language, degenerate language and kinks… (first time writing smut, kinda nervous)
author’s note: although I think of Sanji as a power bottom (so i might have included some praise there as well) I just know how thirsty yall are for a dominant Sanji, especially if he calls you his bitch, lol. Anyways, enjoy.
“Finally alone. - you sigh, putting strands of hair behind your ear as you allow to watch Sanji with the corner of your eye as he closes the bedroom door. - It was such an exhausting day.”
“Agreed. - he sighs as he approaches you with a smile. - good thing we’re here for each other.”
He places a kiss on your forehead, hand caressing your cheek whilst his eyes seem to be putting some sort of magic on you, pulling you closer and making your head spin like coming across an hypnosis, strong enough to shake you off.
Don’t look at me with those eyes.” - you say with a terrible blushing voice, covering his face with your hand, slightly pushing him away from your embrace.
“Mhm? - he hums, pulling you by the waist and kissing your shoulder. - Since when are you so shy around me?”
Sanji asks with a teasing smile as you rest your hands on his chest, slightly blushing.
“Do I still make you nervous although we’ve been together for a while now?” - he keeps planting soft kisses on the skin of your shoulder, travelling to the collarbones, pulling down your coverage a little.
“S-sanji… - you gasp, not expecting him to be all over you right now. - I’m always nervous when I’m with you like this.”
He listens to your voice becoming shaky as he grabs your neck gently, devouring it with kisses and small love bites which only made him more eager.
“You can relax and enjoy it with me, love. - he kisses your ear and whispers. - I always make you feel good, no?”
As he leans you in his bed, his hot breath hits your cold skin, making you shiver. No matter how many times he touches you, your body loses all muscle memory and it feels like it’s the first time over and over again.
Sanji grabs your waist with one hand travelling up from your back, tracing your skin with his fingers. He stops for a moment and looks at you directly in the eyes with a smirk.
He unleashes your bra, a trick he’s mastered fully, taking in the satisfaction of seeing such a lewd expression on your face.
“Be a darling and take the shirt off for me, would you? - he says, taking your wrist and kissing it. - No princess treatment for you tonight though.” - Sanji watches you take off your top, revealing your already unhooked bra hanging over your breasts.
Usually, Sanji would praise you all the time during foreplay. He’d kiss you softly and gently, tracing your curves and calling you his princess. From time to time he’d ask you what you wanted from him and he’d always give it to you. Tonight however, -
“Tonight you’re my bitch.”
Your eyes open wide. Although Sanji had never called you that before, it was impossible to deny that something had just awakened in you.
“Your what?” - you face flushes red, not noticing him going down in your chest, biting your bra and putting it aside.
He’s a smart man who can read you like no other. Sanji knew what would take to make your shyness go away, and he’s doing exactly that.
He starts messaging your breasts while pressing his thumbs on your already hard nipples, getting a cute reaction out of your pretty mouth.
He wants to feel you moaning in his mouth, thus his lips soon enough crash harshly against yours without warning. He grabs your chin, tilting it down with his thumb:
“Open wide.”
Once you follow his command, his tongue starts playing with yours as never before, sucking on it all while his fingers played with your nipples and slowly travelled down your waist and lower stomach, caressing your soft skin.
“Bitch.” That kept playing in your head repeatedly as Sanji touches you, various fantasies playing in your mind like a film for which your face was Sanji’s movie theatre.
“You have anything against it? - he asks teasingly, raising an eyebrow. With that, you shake your head which makes him smirk. - Thought so.”
Your lips become so soft and wet when he kisses you, usually. But now, he bites them, sucks on them and licks them with no hesitation as he takes a strong grip around your waist.
Sanji moves his hand on your back, making you arch it so your bodies touch in the right places.
Unconsciously, as you are completely drown in his kisses, you start grinding against him, leaving out some desperate moans which he reciprocated in your mouth.
“Someone’s getting excited. - he says, plugging his nails into your skin ever so slightly, but still making your body shiver with immense pleasure. - You can’t wait to get dicked down, can you?”
With that question, you nod with a whine.
It can’t be helped. Heavy breaths between kisses, parts which are touching briefly but screaming to get nearer, sloppy lips and trembling legs, everything adding up was making you lose your composure.
“S-sanji… - you moan his name, running your fingers through his hair as you grind harder against him. - P-please…”
“Please what?” - he asks, looking down as your crotch desperately touches his.
With a whine, you touch his belt, pulling him closer.
He smiles and says: “now now, - he grabs your hand and place it in your what he liked to call his pet. - if you’re so impatient, might as well play with yourself until I decide to go down on you.”
Now you’ve completely staring to lose it. He has never asked this before. Whatever switched on him tonight, it’s also switching you up for good. As it goes, you follow his instruction and start touching yourself. Your fingers work their way through under your skirt, only to feel how wet you already had gotten.
“Good girl. - his voice deep and husky as he gazes at your every move. - Feeling good already? - he caresses your thighs with his fingers. - No wonder, a whore like you would get off this easily.”
His words only arouse you more as you let out moans while rubbing yourself slowly and gently. He smirks whilst watching your face literally melting, as you bite your lip and stare into his eyes, as if you were giving him a little show.
“Look at you, - he scans you from head to toe, seeing your body in full ecstasy. - so hot and bothered tonight.”
You moan, one hand in your wet cunt and the other on your mouth as you try to hold yourself from letting out any more lewd sounds. Meanwhile, your man is watching your hand moving under your white skirt.
“I want to enjoy the view, if you don’t mind.” - he grabs your skirt and pulls it down in one try.
So fucking hot of him.
You grab his collar, making Sanji’s body hover over yours. After moaning in his ear, you whisper:
“If I’m your bitch you gotta treat me like one. - you say, untying the buttons of his shirt eagerly. - so give me your cock already, Sanji.”
Something snapped in your lover’s eyes the moment you grabbed his collar and whispered those words. It was pure excitement, growing more evident with each passing moment.
“Love, if you were so horny to begin with you should have just come to me, - he explains, cupping your cheek. - But it’s too late for that now so I might as well cum in you. You’d enjoy that, wouldn’t you?”
“Yes yes, I want you to fill me up, please.” - you whine, parting your legs as you come close to climaxing from touching yourself so desperately.
His mind goes crazy. Sanji takes off his shirt and reveals the body you so much adored all while you unbuckle his belt, attempting to lower his pants when he pushes you against the bed.
He takes the hand which you were teasing yourself with and kisses it, purposely not letting you hit your orgasm. His head goes down to your inner thighs, sucking on them until reaching your zone to which he forms a smirk.
“I wish you could see what I’m seeing. - he says, starting to rub your clit and sucking through the fabric of your panties. - Such a wet mess, all for me.”
You try to restrain your moans, but Sanji was making you almost come with your panties on, let alone what’d happen if he -
“Ah!”- you moan loudly as the blonde pulls down your panties and sucks on your clit while teasing two fingers around your hole. - Ah, fuck, Sanji!”
You whine, pushing your head back and pulling his hair once he puts them in and out slowly at first, only to pick up the pace as he hears your moans go louder.
“Fuck? - he hums, the vibration hitting your zone. - Fuck what, love? This tight hole of yours?”
Shameless. He’s going completely out to eating you like an animal.
You don’t know what has gotten into him but, it was so fucking hot. No matter what, Sanji always goes down on you with so much love. His tongue seems like it’s programmed to find your most sensitive spots and make you feel blessed.
His fingers pick up the pace, making you shout his name multiple times before coming close again.
“let me, Sanji… - you beg, seeing how the your precious love-cook had no intention on letting you finish that easily. He was already making you numb with his fingers alone. - Just let me come already, why you gotta be so mean?!”
“Asking won’t get you nowhere. - he says, inserting his tongue deep into you. - And calling me mean makes you sound like an ungrateful slut, love.”
“Sluts should be thankful then? How can I thank you?” - You lick your lips as you observe his tie still being the only piece of clothing he has on his torso, making him look so sexy. Truly, you swore to yourself you’d let this man do unspeakable things but also a part of you wanted to drive him crazy, make him whimper and cry under your touch.
“Thank me? Oh, trust me love you’re doing enough. - he claims, noticing you’re close. - But if you’re feeling so grateful, might as well finish like the good girl you are.”
It doesn’t take long before you finish on his face, letting out a scream of ecstasy.
Thus, you grab his tie, still hardly breathing, making him to look up to you.
He meets your gaze and licks his lips.
“Fuck, - you cuss out, - you look so pretty like that.”
Once he hears the satisfaction in your voice, Sanji smirks and approaches:
“You want to taste yourself, darling?”- he asks and you nod, pulling him by his collar, kissing him so deeply that he could swear feeling your tongue going down his throat.
“Who’s the bitch now?”- you smirk, attempting to catch him off guard. Little did you know that there was no taming him tonight. Once his eyes meet yours, watching his gaze, you gulp:
“How about you tell me? -
He opens your mouth with his long and tender fingers, inserting two of them in there. You moan, looking at his blue grey eyes intensely.
“Yes, just like that. - he says breathily, - look at that this mouth can do, goodness…”
You suck on his fingers, licking your own cum from them so eagerly. Sanji caresses your cheek with his other hand and says:
“Someone is growing too desperate, - he pushes your bottom lip down with his thumb, - such a needy whore you are.”
Fuck.
Seeing Sanji all worked up like this; his smoky eyes looking down on you, his golden hair already a mess, his tie still hanging on his chest and those strong arms of his that are now surrounding you, his body hovering yours. You felt protected, loved and cared for, but most of all…
“Please Sanji, do me now harder than ever…” - you manage to say breathily, whining about how much you needed him inside of you now.
“You sure? - he starts to take off his shorts painfully slowly. - You want me to fuck you hard, love?”
You bite your lip and nod, looking at Sanji’s hands whilst he unbuckles his pants, leaving you with a great view to witness as he reveals his cock already hard and striving to get deep within you.
“Beg for it.”
He demands while stroking his cock, making you even more eager than before.
“I … - words are hardly coming out of you as your mind is distracted at him touching himself like that.
He teases your entrance with his tip.
“Sanji! - as you moan his name, Sanji smirks and asks again:
“Beg.”
You turn to look away as you stutter out your desperation: “Please, Sanji, please… I can’t take much more of this torture, put your slutty cock where it belongs.”
“Look at me, - he holds your chin up, - you’ll do as I say if you want me to -
Sanji interrupts himself with a groan once his thing grinds against your entry because of your sudden hip movement. You were clearly teasing him and he knows and… he likes it.
“Fuck, - he cusses out, as he grinds his thing against your entry, stroking himself harder, knowing that you were already wet enough and ready for him, - this is gonna be so good, love. I’ll fuck my pretty whore so so good.”
Your eyes shut and your hands clench into the bed sheets, eyes gazing over his cock which looked so good in his hand, slowly entering you. Once you feel the tip going in, your mouth is already drooling. Sanji groans, feeling his length wrapped up all good by your tight walls.
He places a hand on your lower stomach, feeling proud of himself because of how deep he is within you. Then, all that confidence and amusement is reflected in his eyes which turn to yours, easily reading through them and realising how much you loved him doing you like this.
“Ahhh, love. - he moans, beginning to thrust into you slowly. - you’ve been waiting for this all day or what? You’re clenching so good around me.”
As your body gets hotter and hotter, his words only add gasoline to the fire burning inside of you.
“Hnngh, Sanji… - the way his name drops out your mouth like honey, how you grab into his arms as his thrusts become stronger, the way you bite your lip and keep whining about how amazing it feels… all of this was making Sanji experience sensations out of this world. - you’re so good to me.”
“Is that so? - his breath gets heavier, a hand travelling up your throat, grabbing with a light grip on it. - show me how good you feel then. I want you to keep moaning like the dirty bitch you are.”
“Ahhh, fuck… - you shout out loud, feeling his dick go deeper with every thrust. His hand chokes your neck, thumb reaching to your lower lip, brushing it off gently.- Sanji!”
“That’s right, baby. - he groans, surrendering as he clenches his hands on the sheets while looking at your pretty face. You put your hands around his shoulders, scratching it with your nails.
“You wanted my cock so badly didn’t you? - Sanji grabs a hold of your hips, pushing them down with each thrust. - Tell me how bad you want it.”
“I… ahhh shit… - you try to blur out the words. - I want you to break me, love.”
With those words, Sanji takes a hold of your legs and puts them over his shoulders, giving you a new angle which made both of you moan loudly as the pace of his thrusts increases.
“F-fuck, baby… - he stutters, biting his lip as he puhes his head back with a groan. - letting me fuck you like this, what a good girl you are… yes… yes you’re so … ahhh..”
“Sanji, - your hand reaches to pull him in but he reacts quickly, taking a hold of both of your hands and holding them with his on top of your head. - you’re enjoying it right? You like violating my pussy like that, don’t you?”
“Hnghh, s-shut your mouth…” - he says, panting heavily.
“I thought you wanted it opened wide?”
“For fucks sake… - he shakes his head with a smirk. - you want me to fuck your mouth too? Needy slut, wants me to go down her throat until she can hardly breathe.”
“Ahh, yess… - you exclaim, - but finish this first-
Sanji interrupts you as he tightens the grip he has on your hands, staring at your chest as your boobs bounce back and forth. Irresistible, he thinks as he leans in to suck on your nipples. His tongue goes on circular motions, soft lips pulling and slightly biting them. He gropes them with his other hand, as he keeps thrusting, he slaps your boobs and massages them harshly.
“Who knew you liked it rough too… - he smirks as he gets closer to whisper in your ear, his hand still grabbing yours as he caresses your palm with his thumb, - you wanted to be a whore for me, - you feel his cock getting even harder inside you, - you wanted me to slut you out.”
He was right, such a mess you were for him. He grabs onto your thighs, sticking his nails and biting them, leaving a hickey or two before feeling himself getting closer and closer to climaxing.
“Sanji I can’t last longer, - you try to pull away from his grip as your hands were desperate to touch him, - I want you to cum in me, please.”
“What’s that? - he smirks between heavy breaths, - my pretty slut has reached her limit? Alright then, - he lets go from your hands, - be a darling and cum all over my cock.”
“Fuuuuck, - you moan, holding onto his strong biceps as you both finish simultaneously. Your wish comes true as he fills you up inside with his warm semen, dripping out your hole. He came a lot, more than usual.
After a loud groan, he collapses on your body, still trying to catch his breath.
“Goodness… - you say, patting the back of his head. - Sanji?”
You check on him only to see a wide smile on his face.
“What a perv…” - you say with a smile on your face as he chuckles.
“I figured that you love every version of me. - he claims, wrapping himself up your arms.
“Of course I do, - you bite your lip before you claim:
Next time I’ll show you something else.”
Sanji widens his eyes, as his lips can’t stop forming a smile.
Something else, huh?
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azriels-shadowsinger · 2 months
Note
helloooo!!! i wanted to request #15 from the prompt list with Az? have a great day<33
“I’m sorry. I don’t feel the same way.” “Look me in the eyes and tell me that.”
Azriel x Reader
wc: 900
a/n: thank yall for 300 followers!!
prompt list
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You pushed your dinner around on your plate with a fork, unable to ignore the nausea in your stomach that lingered whenever Azriel was gone on a mission. He was supposed to return this morning, and the more time that passed, the larger the pit in your stomach felt. What if he was hurt? Why is he still shielding his thoughts from Rhys? You can’t control the spiral of thoughts.
Just as you are about to stand to throw the food away, you hear a commotion in the other room. Abandoning your plate, you rush towards the living room. When you enter, you see Azriel standing there, reassuring Cassian and Rhys that he is fine. You immediately run, enveloping him in a bear hug. His shadows immediately circle around you and Azriel chuckles, wrapping his arms around you as well. You hear Cass and Rhys quietly leave the room and Azriel assures them that he will fill them in on the mission later.
“You aren’t allowed to leave for that long anymore.” You mumble into his chest. “I was worried something happened.”
“I’m fine, y/n/n. I got held up, but it wasn’t anything I couldn’t handle.” He reassures. “You worry too much.”
“How can I not? My best friend who I love dearly is gone for days at a time with no contact and-“ he cuts you off.
“You what?” He pulls away and stares at you.
“What?” You look at him confused, clearly unaware of what exactly you said, too focused on fussing over him.
“You said you love me.”
Well shit, you think. You have had a crush on Azriel for many years, the two of you constantly flirting and acting in ways beyond what most would consider appropriate for friends. However, it was only recently that you realized that you love him. And you were almost certain he loved you too, but you were always too scared to find out.
“Yeah. I do.” You say hesitantly, biting your bottom lip. Azriel pauses for a long moment before looking at the floor.
“I’m sorry. I…” he hesitates. “I don’t feel the same way.” Your heart sinks.
You knew what he was doing. Azriel’s insecurities run deeper than most people realize. But as his best friend, you were very aware of his habit of self-sabotaging when it came to dating, convinced that he was not good enough for them or that he would only cause them pain. In the past, you hadn’t tried too hard to stop him. Rather, you would selfishly relish in the fact that his time wasn’t being taken up by some other female anymore.
“Then look me in the eyes and tell me that.” You see his hand clench into a fist, and then flex. He was obviously fighting with his inner demons in his head, and if it went on for too long, the demons would win. Not this time, you thought. Not as you felt him slipping through your fingers. You place a gentle hand on his cheek and guide him to look at you.
“Y/n, I don’t-“ his shadows swarmed over his mouth, refusing to let the words leave. You smirked.
“See, even your shadows know you’re full of shit. Wanna try that again?” You said playfully, trying to lighten the mood. He reins the shadows in and takes a deep breath.
“Of course I love you.” You feel the tension ease from your shoulders. “But you deserve more. You deserve someone who doesn’t have a complicated past, who isn’t always leaving on missions, who doesn’t do such horrible things for their job.” His voice shakes slightly.
“I love you because of those things, not in spite of them. Yes, you have a complicated past, but it only proves your strength in overcoming it. Yes, you’re always gone on missions, but it’s because you are fiercely loyal to keeping your court safe. And yes, you may do some gruesome work on those missions, but that doesn’t change the fact that it’s still work that helps the Night Court and keeps us safe.” You can see his eyes light up slightly as you explain the reasons you love him.
“You may think I deserve better, but that isn’t your decision. And I’ve decided that I only want you.” You state matter-of-factly, stepping closer and wrapping your arms around him again. “There’s nothing you can say to stop that. I’ve been your friend for centuries and those things have never bothered me before, why would they now?” He smiles at your words and returns your hug.
“I love your stubbornness.” He mumbles before pulling you into a kiss.
“Keep that in mind down the road when you start to hate it, okay?” You reply with a cheeky grin, pulling a laugh from Azriel.
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this one was kinda tough bc personally i don't think azriel would ever be able to lie about loving someone, the poor guy craves to have someone to love who loves him too. But i also didnt wanna have reader the line, because anyone who knows azriel would never push him away like that if it wasn’t true because they know how badly he wants love. so idk how i feel about this one, lmk what yall think.
prompt list
tag list: @fxckmiup
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weebsinstash · 5 months
Note
hey, can I have more husband and wife family dynamics with thragg? maybe more about her pregnancy or the kids' childhood/baby time?
Sure can! It's been pretty fun writing about potential scenarios where this monstrous piece of shit can actually feel love. First and foremost I was watching a video on YouTube going over this scene again and uh Comic Readers KNOW How Fucked This Man Is. um, out of context vague spoilers but, I'm assuming people asking about Thragg have read the comics or are curious about the comics but like yall Need To Know how he treats the kids of his enemies
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I feel like I need to share/remind people of this scene because like, this man can be kind of hard to pin down. He's from this loveless society that sees kindness as weakness and he's like King Dickhead but there are still times when he can be quite courteous, even apologetic, sarcastic, whatever. I think at the end of the day he's just a very selfish, explosive, emotionally impulsive man but revisiting this scene was a little surprising for me since I forgot he was even like, capable of "small kindnesses" like saying sorry or whatever. Like. Is him wiping her tears while smearing blood all over her face a well intentioned accident or is he like waging psychological warfare on this like, i think she's literally 5 years old. What is the purpose of him apologizing to a child for splashing blood of her family member on her when he intends to kill her or leave her for dead in front of her dying parents anyways. I'm still trying to get a feel on this man
THAT BEING SAID, moving on, we're talking about a yandere Thragg today and thankfully that comes with perks
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- it's pretty obvious but like, you are his favorite mate and your children are his favorite children. I like to think of concepts with Reader being Ursaal and Onaan's mother or even the previously mentioned triplet idea with Mark being their sibling (otherwise I'd have to invent new characters and that doesn't, resonate the same, and I also really like Ursaal actually and I feel like there's some real story potential in Ursaal discovering more of her humanity through her mother's kindness and wanting to protect her mother from her father)
-can you imagine like. I still think about the idea where you're actually Nolan's mate but one day you mouth off to Thragg and he "puts you in your place" in front of Nolan as a punishment to you both and like a month later you find out you're pregnant and, I imagine abortions are only done on Viltrum if the fetus is too weak or defective, so you're forced to carry it and you and Nolan are lying that it's his and then one day Thragg just, passes by, sees your swelling tummy, takes one sniff of you, "it's mine" and demands a paternity test. And you'd think, "oh surely he'd just take the baby" which is what you'd prefer but, no it becomes a pretext for him to steal you from Nolan altogether
-you're fed incredibly nutrient dense, protein packed, ultimate pregnancy food because Thragg wants those babies as healthy as possible. Thragg has probably had other alien kids before but these are his first hybrid or nearly fully Viltrumite children and that makes them special. New dad Thragg holding up these little absolute mammoths of newborns with all their chunk and pudge and rolls and he's just so proud, "look at how robust these children are! Surely they have inherited my strength! Fine additions to the Viltrum Empire were born on this day" and you're like half awake in bed and he just, pets your hair
-ok just. Ok just picture it like. You're pregnant and upset and so stressed out because you didn't want to be Nolan's mate after he helped conquer Earth but at least you had known him and liked him initially. You're just constantly stressed out and angry and watching every single word you say around Thragg because you don't know him or what he's capable of, but I imagine a sort of scenario where he's taking you to the doctor and running tests and procedures and just, you know prenatal checkup stuff, but the doctors are all speaking to Thragg instead of you, you aren't even being told your own test results, and the two of you finally arrive back home and you just break down crying and kind of tear into him, "I'm sure YOU have had lots of kids before but I'VE never had a baby before and I don't know what to expect or what's going to happen or- or -" and you're just bawling because, it's not a lie you're scared. You're having a baby and you're gonna be a new mom and it's entirely against your will, out of your control, and that's incredibly stressful. And this becomes a moment where Thragg actually shows some humanity by sitting you down and discussing the doctors visit with you, and that's one of the first times the two of you actually have a civil, extended conversation
Thragg thinking he's so fucking big and tough and then he sees you this little fragile fleshy untrained civillian with the big teary boo hoo eyes with your shaking hands on your little belly as you cry about being scared about giving birth to his baby and he's just, "shit I DO have feelings" and immediately feels the overwhelming need to comfort you. He'll comfort you under the guise of "stress isn't good for the children" which is true but, it's him blanketing his own concern and masking it under an excuse
-I kind of feel like that hypothetical event would be like, a footnote in your relationship. He starts treating you differently, attentive in new ways, more... emotional ways. He'll stop by while he's working on a break or something to check on with you and the assigned caretakers he has guarding you (because the very second you're confirmed pregnant you have 24/7 security) and he'll awkwardly grunt out questions about, have you eaten yet, are you experiencing any pain today, any discomfort, any new symptoms. He'll check in with your guards/nannies privately about if there's anything you're doing that he needs to know about, give tou a nice husbandly shoulder touch and then (reluctantly) getting back to work
-to be blunt part of me questions if he even has sex to create children or if he uses something akin to IVF and I only say this because of the absolute ASSEMBLY LINE he sets up on Thraxia. Trust me though he beats the kitty up with you CONSTANTLY
-I actually think after giving birth is like the ONE time you're allowed any birth control because apparently if you have too many pregnancies in too close time frames it actually sucks the calcium out of your bones and can give you osteoarthritis and Thragg wants you healthy, "for more future children obviously" which is such a lie because let's say you have your miracle birth of giving him twins or triplets or whatever but you hemmorage and become infertile or whatever. Mf is STILL keeping you around. When you think about it he technically doesn't even need you to help raise his children, he has people for that, but he forces you to be part of the process anyways
- tbh I kind of like the idea of Thragg developing some weird fucking like complex where he discovers he feels comforted cuddling you, like man gets hit by oxytocin like a fucking freight train, and it becomes him literally being unable to sleep without you in his arms. You could be in a yelling screaming argument with this man and he suddenly like, just completely shuts you down, "ENOUGH!! I require rest and I won't tolerate anymore of your childish whining!" And you could be spitting mad at him and he's just, picking you up just physically picks you up and drags you to bed anyways. Hooks his arms around your waist as the big spoon and buries his face in your hair even as you spit insults about how you hope he kills himself
Like I think I've mentioned this idea with other characters before but imagine Thragg waking up on the middle of the night IMMEDIATELY PISSED because the bed beside him is cold and he finds you on the couch, on the couch, maybe even without blankets and visibly uncomfortable, because yeah he WILL wake you up to drag you back to bed with him.
- Thragg being this warrior who literally watched people be disembowled and tortured and conquered races but suddenly you're in labor and he's in the delivery room (he refuses to wait outside) watching you literally scream in pain and he just, takes your hand and tells you to squeeze, and that it'll be alright, and he sees you so vulnerable and scared and emotional and you're looking to him for some kind of help but he can't, even with all his strengths and feats he can't help you right now, however this pregnancy goes is up to fate and the doctors and he feels like an actual visceral HUMBLING sense of helplessness that just makes him, even more obsessively protective over you
- deadass if it becomes a "he can only save one: you or the children" life-threatening pregnancy scenario, he chooses you. Says you can always try again but even if you wind up infertile and "useless" to him, he's too attached to you at this point, it doesn't matter if you "don't serve a function" or whatever bullshit Viltrumite mindset he may have had with previous mates before. You're different to him, and you're making HIM different as a person
- You're just half alive on the couch because Giving Birth is Hard and here's Thragg doing shit like personally bringing you water, feeling your forehead for any fever, monitoring your condition, aggressively interrogating your guards for extra info, sitting beside you with your babies in his arms. He lets you rest after giving birth and nearly bends over backwards
- I feel like at some point you're forced to accept a lot of real fucked up stuff and especially if you are a hybrid Vultrimite yourself and thus will be with Thragg for, basically forever, like some real "mate, do you have any cravings today. What do the children require" "ummm... at the ceremony last month, there was that... blue, little.... crab thing?" "A Florkian. They are incredibly rare" "oh... I'm sorry, I didn't know-" " -and since I observed that you were fond of the taste when you were consuming them, I went ahead and conquered their homeworld and farms have been established. I can have the slaves prepare a dish for you right away" "oh, thank you, ive been craving it ever since i ate it but i didnt want to bother by asking 🥰" "as your mate it is my duty to provide for you. Do not keep any of your desires from me"
- your children are getting trained as soldiers the second they develop powers and that's something you'll have to get used to. If your little babies get their powers at 5, they're still learning combat, getting knocked around, near beaten, "toughened up". Thragg will conceal the full extent of how they're treated from you because the way he sees it, you weren't raised on Viltrum and you're simply ignorant of their culture. He doesn't need you to accept how things are. Your kids will come home with black eyes and bruises and bloodied noses and he'll growl at you not to make them too soft as you weep over Ursaal missing a chunk of her hair because an opponent grabbed her by it and she had to break away and some was ripped out at her scalp, like. The psychological damage of asking your small child how their day with their father went, "it was excellent mother, I made my first kill!!" And then gleefully describing to you in detail how while their father was fighting an enemy soldier, the soldiers child attacked yours, and, your baby killed another kid. Like. That's the sort of thing you have to be raised with to block out of your heart. Going to hug your child who may not even be 10 years old and they have literal blood on their hands
-personal headcanon but also semi canon but I imagine Ursaal is the most competent of your twins and is Thragg's favorite. She just has a better tactical mind on her shoulders and isn't, uh. As horribly sadistically violent as Onaan. Like say your kids become platonic yandere or whatever, or, you have your own kids with thragg and the twins are separate but still attached to you. Onaan is the kid you find killing cats because he's jealous they get more attention than him while Ursaal is like, giving her father incredibly detailed reports and her own insight into what you've been up to, how you're feelings, things you say and do when Thragg isn't around
-so I know y'all see that image I posted with Thragg and his twins. I tried to censor, The Cape last time but I realized like, even with censoring the head it's still super obvious who that is, there's only one white furred creature in this entire show. I imagine after Thragg gets his Beast Drip that, once Throkk's daughter comes for revenge, she is also slaughtered, and her pelt becomes YOUR cape. Or maybe Thragg offhandedly mentions to you that BB Jr has vowed vengeance and you're casually flipping through a book, "is she as strong as her father, like if you had to rate it 1 to 10 with her father being 10 and 1 being a human. If the daughter is at about a 7 or below, Ursaal should be able to handle her, get herself a nice coat to match her father" and Thragg feels this warmth in his chest to hear you're actually observant of his/your children and their prowess, especially to hear you praise Ursaal in such a uh violent context, just casually suggesting his daughter could turn another sentient humanoid creature into a pelt to wear. This is another example of "living the viltrum life will eventually dehumanize you and rob you of certain empathies"
- I don't think you would actually have a title but could you imagine if Thragg decides you're like, officially his true mate, like the mate above all others, like you're the Empress in his little harem of concubines and ladies in waiting. I hc that your official title is something like Grand Duchess or perhaps if this is the twin/triplet scenario something more vaguely historical sounding like The High Mother or Regent Mother or, you get the point
-I still think "Reader turns out to be an incredibly late blooming hybrid" is a neat concept but I also don't know how they would miss that since during your pregnancy and all you're receiving medical care out the ass but like. Thragg personally training both you and the children as a family. Would be kind of humiliating honestly because it's kind of vaguely implied you should learn things before the kids do and if you struggle, here's Thragg, telling his kids in private they have to protect you and keep an eye on you and report any problems back to him
- thragg would definitely be training you in hand to hand but suddenly finds he can't bear hitting you in the face or hitting you at a certain strength. Like. Absolutely 100% you're gonna have a lot of scenarios where you're brawling or wrestling and he pins you and it swiftly transitions to you getting rawdogged from your high on adrenaline husband. Tbh that sex would probably be his favorite, where he has to defeat you in combat and then rewards himself. Can probably border from hatesex to consensual to noncon, not that he has a problem doing THAT to you either
- probably has portraits done of you and him. Idk do you think Viltrum has like enough art culture for portraits to be a thing? Most fascist tyrants have portraits. He would have several done: you and him, just you, you while pregnant, him and you while pregnant, you holding your babies, you and him holding your babies, and family shots as they grow up. Say you conquer a planet together as a family and one day you're revisiting and there's some sort of museum set up amd you find like a wall length portrait of, you and your children soaked in blood tearing carnage through the fire and flames and Thragg is beside you just nodding in approval, "they captured your image rather well"
- goooooddddd imagine you're just a normal human and you progressively start showing signs of aging. You start getting more wrinkles. Your body starts working in different ways, popping, cracking, aching. Onaan, Ursaal, and Thragg all notice and they're like FREAKING OUT HONESTLY. The children don't want to accept that their mother is actually going to be a speck on the timeline of their entire lifespans. Thragg doesn't want to accept that he has to let you go and you're never coming back. They all become obsessed with finding ways to keep you young, keep you alive, fuck it they'll clone you and transfer your consciousness into a new body if they have to! This is comic book world and these are obsessed aliens and they have OPTIONS
- something something "what if Reader isn't a viltrumite hybrid but is still like super-powered or a mutant or whatever and this isn't revealed until you like are fatally injured or even DIE die and suddenly you, pop back up". Cause I feel like this "close call" would drive any yandere literally insane because, what if there's no second chance, what just happened, can you still die, they can never never never never never allow you to get hurt ever ever ever again
Thragg just walks into the kitchen and you have the stove top red hot and you've just got your palm resting on it and you look to him kind of just shocked, all, "look... nothing happens... I just feel some of the warmth" and Thragg just puts his fist through your oven anyways, "you could've gotten hurt" and immediately picking you up and carrying you to some sort of perceived "safer place"
- this is like a specific scenario but like, can you imagine as a mom you like to brush and comb Ursaal's hair and you idly suggest she could always grow it out more and you could help braid it and things, but once it starts getting longer Thragg objects and says it could get grabbed during a fight and orders her to cut it but you step in and say she shouldnt have to, it's HER hair, and you two get into it, and one day Ursaal is brought home by her father and he's all but shaved her head after she had actually grown it out to a decent length. You and Thragg are at odds over how to treat rhe children and Ursaal begins to realize that many of the restrictions her father instills on her are because of a way of life she may not fully agree with, a life filled with violence and bloodshed with no room for love or kindness or creativity. She probably helps you from going over the edge too, honestly. If anything else through this life with Thragg, in your darkest places you may still find yourself thinking you have to keep going to try and help your children
- with others, Thragg is the kind of yandere where he's standing in the same room as you and you're both doing completely different things and he suddenly says, "so I noticed during the meeting that your eyes kept lingering on my mate" and without further warning he's beating up someone on the accusation they were lusting for his wife, no discussion, just fists , and he'll do shit like this a lot to the point people don't feel comfortable being around you and you're just further socially isolated
- I feel like Thragg would have some weird like fondness slash fetish for watching you breastfeed. Like, awww here's his cute little wife with his chubby little babies and you're giving them their nice milk, what a good mom, providing for the babies he put in your belly ❤️ part of me is convinced if you're a viltrumite or hybrid or whatever that you uh. Eventually wind up with a lot of babies. A LOT of babies. Do you think he would want a specific amount or its just vibes. Like you're over 300 years old and you've already got 50 kids with him but he sees you teaching one of your youngest sons how to throw a punch and suddenly he wants another
- all I'm saying is if he ever catches you self harming or attempting to hurt yourself he's gonna have a real extreme reaction. Like he finds you cutting yourself with a broken glass and you're immediately restrained and taken to a hospital, completely stripped, inspected for other wounds, and if there are any and especially a lengthy history of them, you're in such trouble. But I also think it would be extremely difficult to hide this from him since as time goes on you two are constantly having sex or he's inviting himself into your shower to bathe with you. You accidentally bang your arm on a counter or something and get a tiny bruise, this man will know about it and wants a detailed report on where it came from
- even when you guys aren't super familiar with each other and you've "just met" he's already protective and all that. Like you've just been brought into his home and you barely even know him still and he may even act mean and angry to you and then one day he sees you have a large bruise on your arm, "what is this?" ".... it's nothing, Grand Regent" "I asked you a question and you'll answer me: where did this come from" "... I spoke out of turn with one of your advisors and turned to leave without permission, Grand Regent" "And so they grabbed you?" "Yes Grand Regent" "who" "it was my fault, I-" "WHO" and the second you give a name or description he's wordlessly leaving the room and shows up again HOURS later with visible blood on him, "it has been handled. You are not to be harmed or punished without my permission or instruction"
- in some scenario where you leave the kids behind and try to run away, like... he isn't just gonna throw up his hands, "well I already got children out of her, she has served her purpose" and leave you the fuck alone. If anything this man would track you down just to tell you off for having the fucking nerve to disobey and defy him! I can picture an actively captured wife where you are constantly kept on some kind of restraint or have a bracelet or collar or even a LEAD THAT HE HOLDS and you're IMPRISONED rather than "I'm being monitored but otherwise I have my own agency". Thragg will make himself a throne that you can be chained to if he has to. He'll have restraints made that are decorative and complimentary of your features. Imagine he's making some sort of public appearance and while he's speaking he's got an arm around your waist and you're pulled up against him and meanwhile you've got. A bar gag and cannot speak
- really, truly, in a way, you become a symbol, but one of all different kinds. There are Viltrumites who see how their mighty Grand Regent treats his mate and they are viscerally disgusted (Kregg and Lucan comes to mind), like people who really start to question the society they are living in, questioning if it really must be so selfish and devoid of empathy, questioning if they really want to keep living this way and for their children and their children's children to live like this. Then there are others who see the way the Grand Regent controls his mate and see its as a sign of strength and permission to treat their own mates the same.
Mostly, though... the only thing that will take you away from Thragg is death. Until the day one of you dies, you're stuck with him, and there's basically no one around who's stronger than he is, period. You might as well cozy up and get friendly with your new husband, since you're going to be together for a long time and spend lots, and lots, and LOTS of time together ❤️
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red-write-hand · 3 months
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"You're killing people?" "No, I'm killing boys." || thomas shelby x assassin!reader
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pairing -> thomas shelby x assasssin!fem!reader
word count -> 2.5k (this took me two weeks)
warnings -> i was watching jennifer's body while i was writing the beginning and i think it accidentally started to seep into my writing, bisexuality??, hella tension, maybe some ooc tommy???, assassin stuff, a lot of dirty thoughts (i mean a lot)
notes -> yeah jennifer's body was a reeeally big influence of this. i had a good idea but this could have died, sorry yall!! also no beta read, we die like peaky fookin' blinders
REBLOGS AND COMMENTS ARE LITERALLY SO HELPFUL Y'ALL HAVE NO IDEA
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An assassin is defined as someone who is paid to kill someone. In this business, you need to pay a handsome price to kill someone as important as Thomas Shelby. It wouldn’t be easy but no one saw a beautiful woman as someone who could kill you, but then again, that was usually the same people who called her sweetheart when passing her in the street. The very same people who would never be able to harass another woman after her. Y/n cut down any man that would hinder her fellow woman. Women too, if she viewed them as a threat. She was completely innocuous. She looked like every washerwoman in Birmingham. No one ever thought she was the one who was slowly taking out Peaky Blinders one by one. 
No one saw her go in and no one saw her leave. It was easy for her. Men were becoming easier and easier for her to manipulate. Really, this is truly why she was bisexual. Women were truly better but sometimes she would find that one man who saw her. Saw her for what she was. A soldier who didn't know how to stop what she was doing. She had gotten so good at it that every time that she wanted to stop, another high paying aristocrat or politician would waltz in and give her a stack of cash to do away with their competition and she knew that her rent was due so just had to keep going. She was also supporting her family, all the family she had left after the war. She had grown up with brothers and most had gone to war and come back changed. There was nothing she could do about it. She just had to keep her head held up high and persevere, and persevere she did. She began to get very good at petty crimes, and more importantly getting away with them. Another thing she got good at was blending into the background. Become a nobody. Someone that people could easily see through. An excellent cover for an assassin.
There was another part of her that wanted recognition. Y/N wanted that fame and fortune. Nothing that she could have. Women had to work twice as hard in this world. Especially in the business of murder. Then again, those feminist rallies kept yelling about fucking over the patriarchy, why not instead, poison the patriarchy? Slowly? Maybe in the night? Maybe a little murder could do the feminist cause some good. She seemed to know every woman in this tiny town. She really didn’t but it was quite fun to see the men worry that all the pretty women they felt up would disappear. No one knew she existed and everyone knew her name. She barely knew how everyone knew her name. Maybe she did have a bit of that fame and fortune business. She just hoped that it would lead to women feeling a little safer to walk the streets, knowing that they had a silent protector who was not against a little homicide in the name of female comradery. It always feels a little warmer when you know you have a friend protecting you with a knife in the back of her skirt. It was never outright said but it was only men that saw through her. Women knew she was there. This is why she never took jobs that meant hurting or killing women. If it was a husband, she would leave the money for the widow. She was not going to be an asshole about it. No matter what, she would make sure that no woman would go without help. 
She had no qualms about killing men. As much as she loved men, especially tall, dark, and handsome men, they can be a real pain to deal with sometimes. She tried to stay civil but really, how can straight women deal with them all the time? How do they not realize that the best part about married men are their wives?! And god, did the Shelby boys have the best pick of the women! God the women that hung around the Shelby betting shop were proper fit. Or maybe that’s just what drunk men said about them. 
Tonight was special. It would be the death date of Thomas Shelby. The people who had paid her to poison him and make it look like a suicide. The only thing was that he was at a gala. 
Great. 
Using some of her extra earnings and her pay from doing laundry, she bought herself a tight fitting dress and some sparkling jewelry. She stood in front of her mirror and surveyed her body. She wasn’t well endowed at all, really she was the most average looking woman in the country, but not tonight. Tonight she would be the prettiest girl in the room. Tonight she would kill two birds with one stone. She would wreck Thomas Shelby’s public image and she would actually kill the devil. Her. She would be the one to kill the Devil of Small Heath. Oh what joy it would be to sit back and watch the Peaky Blinders scuttle around like sewer rats after their god and king died. They would never know who killed him, well, they would think they knew. She would make it look like a suicide but really, that was easy to stage. She would cry along with everyone else and wipe her tears with the cash she would receive after this job was done.
Stepping out of the car, making sure her dress wasn’t flashing anyone, she made her way up the stairs to the Shelby charity gala. Her dress was short and her faux fur shawl was draped around her shoulders precisely so that she would get all the right looks. She had studied men for too long without knowing what they looked for. Sauntering onto the floor, looking for the guest of honor, her trained ears could pick up the hushed chatter. Everyone here thought she was a prostitute. Figures. A woman dresses the way she wants and people call her a whore. Maybe it's for the better. It would ruin his reputation even more. Be here and be seen talking with a woman who people gossiped was a prostitute? Perfection. She hadn’t even planned this bit.
Finding him was the easy part. Talking was harder. He was surrounded by donors and grifters trying to weedle their way into his pocket. He just hadn’t noticed her yet. She perched herself on the edge of a stool at the bar and ordered what she usually liked to drink on the job. A daiquiri. Easy and plain. Continuing to accentuate her inconsequentiality. She wrapped her crimson covered lips around the rim slowly, watching him circle the room and finally alighting his eyes on her. She turned on her bedroom eyes and ripped more of her drink as she crossed her legs. She was trying to go for ‘come over and see if I’ll take a chance on you’ but really, it was more like ‘come over here and I’ll ruin you before you can finish whatever drink you order to look more casual’. This had worked plenty of times before so she was fairly sure it would work on him. At his core, Thomas Shelby was still a man. A man with a cock. A cock that needed a lot more than a regular man, or so Lizzie Stark told her. She loved Lizzie. Whenever Thomas was done with her, Y/N would always offer her a place to stay and open arms for her to settle in. Stroking through her hair was somehow calming to both of them at the same time.
The room seemed to heat up as he got closer. It really was a toss up if he would guess what she was really here for. Tensing up, she could feel him behind her. Shifting her hair so that it cascaded down her shoulder wasn’t a huge issue but it did wonders for her confidence. Her breath got shallower but gathering all of her courage, her foot spun her barstool to face the looming figure of Thomas Shelby.
“What are you ‘ere for, eh?” The head Shelby took a drag from his cigarette. Giving Y/n a once over, he chuckled. She obviously wasn’t a prostitute but really, he wanted to see what her game was. He was not about to impede a fellow business person while they are trying to do business. She tried to compose herself, tried to keep herself from falling into the endless pools that were his eyes. Endless pools that would ultimately drag her down and bring her to ruin before she could drive her knife into his chest and put an end to the whole ordeal. She could do it right now. She could see the blood seep out of him and see that look of pain that she so dearly needed to see from him. That look of pain that would be payment for all the harm he and his family had caused. She pondered whether or not she should actually fuck him here and now or fake wanting to and kill him just to get it over with. All this nasty business, gross man blood getting on this amazing dress. 
“Here on business Mr. Shelby. Lizzie Stark gives her regards.” She would apologize to Lizzie later. Dear, dear Lizzie. Hopefully she would forgive Y/n for this later. She swung her legs around and walked closer to him, dragging a single hand down his chest. The easiest part of her job was having sex. She constantly thought about herself as a female protagonist written by a man made the process a little easier. Molding herself to the wants of the man. 
She just wanted to hide away from the world but right now she was on the clock. Laying the charm on heavy and batting her eyelashes. His heart was beating faster and faster. This was getting easier and easier. Now she was divided. It was taking too long. The longer it took, the more attached she got. This is one target she didn't want to get attached to.
“Just because you look fuckin’ gorgeous, doesn’t mean you can just-” She gently plucked the cigarette from his pink lips and took a drag herself. Under her other hand, his pulse raced faster. She beamed at him. This time, she was actually feeling some semblance of happiness. Taking a small step forward, she got as close as she could so the smoke, ebbing and flowing from the smoldering edge of the cigarette, would be the barrier between them. She felt a strong hand at her waist, the hand away from the crowd, so the interaction would still look inconspicuous. 
The cigarette hung her from her dark painted lips. They stood an inch away from each other. Each one wanted the other to move first. In his mind, he dreamed of slick thighs, breathy moans, painted breasts, fucked-out expressions, and those perfect gummy walls hugging his cock so well as she screamed in pleasure. In her mind, she dreamed of a perfectly executed mission…and nothing else. Definitely not his perfect jaw and how strong his hands felt at her waist. Definitely the way he was looking at her. Well, at least that meant she was doing what she did best correctly, but still…there was some part of her that had that morbid curiosity. Lizzie had told her what Tommy was like. Rough but loving. Rough enough to satiate himself but since he had taken all this effort to bring you here, he would not snap you in half. Maybe she could do that for one night. That would make a good story. ‘I spent the night with Thomas Shelby and survived’. Definitely something Lizzie would find funny.
Her mind just kept going back and forth in the span of a minute. Does she give in to her curiosity and see what the Devil of Small Heath would do to her or does she put on even more of a show just to ruin his reputation and then pull him outside to finish him off quietly. ‘Pun very much not intended.’ Truly, this was the worst situation to be punny. 
To try to keep her mind on the man in front of her, her eyes just kept alighting on his sturdy looking chest. There was something strangely mysterious about what lay under that perfectly pressed tux. Just to be able to slowly pull every layer off of him was tantalizing. Maybe she might. 
All of this took place in two minutes. They had gotten impossibly closer. His hands had started to slide down, slowly and even slower as she played with the edge of his tie. Oh how much fun it would be to pull him by his impeccable tie, just for him to land on top of her. This could be very fun.
His thoughts were undressing her, meticulously feeling every curve and every fold, kneading anywhere he could elicit a reaction, kissing, biting, anything she wanted. Feeling her under him. Hearing all those pretty noises as he devoured her completely. He knew that all she wanted to do was destroy his reputation but really? What’s so bad about having a little bit of fun? No one could comment because no one messed with the King. 
No one.
They were forcibly shoved together at the hip. His grip was harsh and she was grinning. Sliding the cigarette behind her ear, she gently, temptingly, tantalizingly brushed her plump lips against the edge of his jaw, leaving trace amounts of her lipstick and perfume with it. Giving him one more flash of her sultry eyes and ghosting her hand against his face, ever so delicately holding his jaw, she grabbed her clutch and escaped expertly from his grasp. But not slipping her number into his jacket pocket so he knew where to find her. This was a different kind of mission now. A longer game. A game where she would move up the ranks. Infiltrating the Shelby operation at every level. Finding out their secrets. Knowing what shouldn't be known. She’d make a pretty pound for what she would know. 
Of course, there was that added bonus. Now she had her snares in the most powerful man in Birmingham. Now she could manipulate him as she liked. She would make him fall for her completely. Make him promise her the world. Make him believe that she was what she told him. See her as she wanted him to see her. Control his judgment if someone decided to try to sow seeds of doubt into her darling. Making sure that when she was finally ready to stick the gilded knife in his back, that he would smile and tell her that he loved her one last time. Till next time Mr. Shelby, until next time.
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thank you for reading (and if you reblogged/commented, double thanks) !!
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kaceythecrunch · 2 months
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RANT. (sturntok.)
Yall. Im so mad. Sturntok pisses me the fuck off to the point it isn't even funny anymore. This might be messy, so bare with me.
Tara. Why the fuck is everyone pressed about Tara hanging out with the triplet, specifically matt and Chris. Yall are acting as if it was only two of them, like they're on a date. They were with fucking I don't know, 8 other people? Like why does Sturntok care who they hangout with? Did you not learn from elementary school to mind your bees wax, or business? You're probably 15. They're literally 5 years older than you. There is no way, in any universe they're gonna date you girl. ALSO TO SHIT ON TARA?? LIKE GIRL. FIND SOMEONE ELSE TO SHIT ON CUZ HOMEGIRL DONT CARE. SHE DONT CARE. SHE IS STRIVING AND LIVING LIFE LIKE YOU SHOULD GIRL. Live life and don't care. You'll probably have a positive outcome. No cuz y'all know how Chris owns the Saturn necklace thing? Its vivienne underwood. It's less than 20 bucks on Amazon. Also when was the last time y'all saw Chris wearing that necklace girl. Also there's a post from like months, or I think a year ago of Tara wearing the same necklace. These fucking tiktok girls are so annoying. Like we get it, everyone wants to be Tara. (she's my gf.)
Podcast. I saw a bunch of btiches shit on the podcast. Like cmon. THEY ARE PRODUCING AN HOUR LONG VIDEO FOR YALL EVERY WEEK. Mfs are burnt out, you're lucky that they even produce content for you ungreatful hoes. Like lwk, I'd rather have them remove Wednesday videos. I remember when they first started their podcast that they were really excited to start and stuff. I also remember, I believe it was their earlier vlogs. When they were still living in Boston and they haven't like went to LA yet, they were talking about turning their basement into a podcast room. Like cmon. This is something they've been wanting to do and you hoes just don't appreciate anything. Like have y'all's mama's not been pissed at y'all for not appreciating her food. Live life positive and not negative tf. But ofc, I respect their decision.
Intro. Yall just love to shit on everyone. Ruining the party. Sturntok reminds me of the kids-the class "clowns" who would be so shitty to the teacher for no reason and would ruin fun things for everyone. Like guys, I think we should all as a community bully Sturntok. It requires a bit more bullying, just to knock some sense into their heads. Anyways, back to what I was ranting about. I loved their new intro. its a new era. A new them. Change. Is. Fucking. hard. I understand that you love the teens from Boston running around making fools of themselves. Me too, I shall admit it. But in order to get sponsorships, to get the little paring things. (For example, them sponsoring Celsius, even becoming the youtooz thing.) Like they gotta act more professional.
Change. This tied in with the last few things. CHANGE IS HARD. CHANGE IS A DIFFICULT THING. But how the fuck are you gonna live life, and enjoy life when your stuck on one thing forever. Change is needed for growth, and for learning. Like guys, THEYRE 20. I think that's something y'all forget. They aren't teenagers anymore. Its kinda like how when everyone went into middle school and started to not like kiddy things when you still liked kiddy things. When I was in middle school I still like to play with Legos, draw, watch anime. Until I hit 7th grade, aka everyone's downfall. I still enjoy some of those things today but I changed because people in middle school stopped like those things and its embarrassing (well for me at least) to show up in school with anime shirts cuz I'm getting older. Thats what they're feeling I guess. Again, theyre 20 now.
Crazy ass mfs. Crazy, as in them soft mf's on sturntok. Also what pisses me off more is that they're coming here on tumblr. Like no, I know your soft ass belongs on Wattpad bffr. I have a long rant about this one, so bare with me again. They are so so so so so SOOOOO sensitive about the "spicy edits." Sometimes the fucking video frame isn't even about something "spicy" aka- them being shirtless, video frame near their crotch. It was when there was a song about sex. How soft can you be. Most songs these days are about sex. Some songs y'all probably didn't know about was about sex. (cake by the ocean for example.) LIKE LETS ME FOR REAL. MOST SONGS ARE ABOUT SEX. Also with the tiktok audios being removed like cmon. Not everything is about sunshine and rainbows. I remember I commented on a Chris edit and I was like.
"I need this man in my life. He's so hot."
"you're fucking gross. He's a human being and do you know how grossed out he would be if he saw that you said this? (bullshitbullshit,morebullshitandstupidness.)"
Yeah, keeping fucking running your mouth. THIS TIKTOK HAS LIKE 4K VIEWS. DO YOU WANNA KNOW HOW MUCH FUCKING FOLLOWERS THE TRIPLETS HAVE? YEAH. THAT'S NOT EVEN A QUARTER OF WHAT THEY HAVE. THIS VIDEO HAS 1K COMMENTS. ARE THEY FUCKING HUNTING ME DOWN?? MY COMMENT HAS 3 LIKES. WHY WOULD THEY CARE TO FUCKING CHECK GIRL. ITS ALSO TELLING THE FUCKING PERSON WHO EDITED THIS THAT THIS EDIT WAS FIRE AND THAT THEY MADE THE EDIT HELLA GOOD. UR FUCKING LUCKY I KEPT MY ANGER TO MYSELF CUZ OH GIRL. I WOULD SUCKER PUNCH YOU. You know whats also funny? They're the same people who will be pissed with when they see matt or Chris with a female. Like girl. You're calling me fucking gross? Do you think how much more worse that is than my comment? You ruin friendships. OG sturniolo fans know that they've been friends with girls. If you genuinely care, yall would know that nick made most of matt and chris' friends. Meaning most of them were females. SO OBVIOUSLY THEYRE GONNA HAVE GIRL FRIENDS. I remember watching the Zach sang pod when nick was on and he explained that matt usually doesn't make the friends. Theres a joke where matt says "I'm gonna make a friend that wasn't originally nick's friends." smth like that. Anyways, off topic. Just because they are seen with a girl, doesn't mean they are fucking dating them. Like shut the fuck up. please. Respectfully shut the fuck because I'm a nice person. Also Chris gives off major virgin vibes lets bffr.
Madi. Yall hate so bad on Madi and its fucking grossing me out. Why do you have to ship her with matt and chris??? Literally to the point they can't even put her in photo dumps or videos. You just gotta ruin it for everyone, huh? shes fucking gorgeous, and she's so funny in videos. Plus, when she does talk shes hillarious. She literally reminds me of Matt. She doesn't fucking talk much because she is more of a listener.. Like guys bffr. How can you hate her when she barley spoke in videos. Like respectfully, shut the fuck up. Yall just jealous shes pretty.
Calling Nick fine. I also hate them mfs who are always running their mouth about girls calling Nick fine. Lets bffr. Y'all didn't think a gay guy is fine? I'm sure you've had a crush on one gay person before. And if you haven't trust me. You will. I had a crush on my gay friend in 8th grade. I feel like its a canon even in every girl's life. anyways, I hate when girls will be scared to call nick hot.
"Nick is so fine. But like as a cool guy friend way. Please don't attack me."
POOR GIRL BELIEVES SHE IS GONNA BE ATTACKED IF SHE CALLS A GAY MAN FINE. Sturntok leave her the fuck alone. He's hot as fucking and I will kill civilians if I'm not given more nick edits. He's so fine. Literally the hottest triplet.
If u made it here thanks. There was shit on my chest that I really needed to let out. What have we learned today?
Sturntok can suck my fucking dick.
Thanks goodbye.
Me to Sturntok :
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abbyshands · 16 days
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YESSSS, imma piggy back on what you said real quick. Most people understand the concept of sex and the basic acts of sexual intercourse by middle school/the age of 12. It’s really not that hard to grasp and whether they’ve indulged in those certain acts or not doesn’t change the fact that they most likely know what it is.
So when people try to pass it on or even justify it as “well it’s an innocent reader/mc” or even “it’s just fiction” it doesn’t matter, you’re writing about someone and/or something in a childlike connotation. Who is actually saying or responding to “oh my cunny this” or “my private parts this” 🧍🏾‍♀️ Like be actually so real please. I’m telling you dude some of them like children and don’t wanna say it.
Don’t get me started on that “corruption” shit either cause a lot of y’all (whoever this applies to) are openly admitting to wanting to “ruin someone’s innocence” in your writing and it’s not cute like yall think it is😭
tw // pedophilia, csa
for fucking real. for the “corruption” kink, to be honest, it’s bearable as long as it isn’t to the degree of an overly innocnet “adult” reader, who may as well be a baby/child. but let’s be so serious: you’ll have had sex ed classes in high school if you’re an adult, regardless of “innocence,” etc, or religion, per say, because that seems to be an excuse people use to play off a “pure” reader who’s really more childlike when it comes down to it. you can be a virgin, “pure,” think sex is immoral, blahblahblah, while knowing its core fundamentals, and the basic concept. there’s no reason in hell an adult reader shouldn’t know where their clit/hole is, where a penis is inserted into a vagina, what cumming is, how sexual intercourse works as a general consensus, etc. there’s no reason your reader or your main character should be yapping ab a “cunny,” “clitty,” “private/princess parts,” “potty,” etc. are you fucking kidding me?
and then people are seriously bending over backwards to defend it? i mean, let’s be real, you’re not earning any points here. why are you defending a phenomenon where people find sexual pleasure, sexual arousal, in behaving like a baby/child during sexual intercourse? does that not sound unbelievably repulsive, or have i lost all common sense? i mean, fucking honestly. people need to get a grip. quit playing off coquette-ified pedophilia as a kink, because as a csa survivor, as someone who has seen what it’s like to put your trust into an adult as a child, then have them violate the shit out of you sexually, you fucking repulse me. i’m sick of seeing it all over my home page and it being so goddamn normalized. it’s triggering and i find it absolutely horrific. weird isn’t even the word: people. are fucking. sick.
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