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#I never know if I should count this as writing
ashersanity · 2 days
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— “IT’S ALL IN THE FAMILY.”
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— summary. because you — you stupid little fuck, should have known better than to assume the worst out of this sick family you’ve been unwillingly forced into from your parents unfaithful divorce. well, guess what? you were fucking right, and now — you only have yourself to blame, baby brother.
— content warning! incest, step-cest, dub-con at best, non-con at worst, brief mentions of bullying and violence, alcohol intoxication, manipulation, big brother whitney being a creep, whiny little sister kylar, daddy bailey being bailey, loser male reader, semi-forced blow job, cream pie, shit writing, no editing, no nothing and shittier plot with two disconnected scenes, went a little overboard with kylar. a little.
— word count? wait, you guys count the fucking words and don’t raw dog it in the notes app? like, real long, I guess. I mean, fucking long.
— asher’s note. “I did it purely for the sister fucking. @princesstokyomoon kept encouraging the filthy thoughts so I had to churn something out. something filthy — and I mean fucking disgusting shit, y’know?”
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Divorces papers hastily signed away, the ink dotted onto the lines promising that this was indeed reality along with leathered suitcases packed to the brim. Family problems never were easy, much less when it had all happened far too quickly. To your parents separating, the familiar grip of your mother’s hand stringing you far away from the house you had grew up in, it all seemed like one bad dream. Unfortunately it wasn’t, no. This was the harsh reality of things, hands clasped on your shoulders as you were forced to introduce yourself to the man she had vowed to marry and the children he bore.
Fuck, if only your mother hadn’t remarried.
“This is stupid.” You muttered beneath your breath to which your mother, sharp as ever had somehow heard.
“Oh please, this is necessary. Unless you wish for us to keep on living in that cramped apartment? I am only doing what is needed for us to survive.” She sharply retorted back, not leaving much room to argue with as it was the truth. Your lives had been much more difficult since the divorce, selfish father that took everything else with him and went away to god-knows-where, probably off to spend it all in one go at the sleazy brothel in town. Filthy bitch.
Yes, it had been hard, but if you had been given one more year, finished school for real, graduated and got a job — Perhaps then, you would’ve been able to provide for the two of you and—
“Why don’t you introduce yourself, dear?”
Breaking out of your reverie, you had faintly registered then that you had arrived into this overly large establishment your mom referred to as your new home. Standing before you was probably the man she had fussed about so much during the uneventful drive. Dark, slicked back hair and stern eyes that dragged over your lips down to the curve of your throat, almost as if to criticize. His outstretched arm and hand stuck out waiting, that was probably for yours to shake which you reluctantly did.
“It’s nice to meet you, sir..?” You uttered coolly, enduring the firm grasp he had on your fingers till he finally was the first to pull away.
“Bailey.”
“Bailey.” You repeated back the unfamiliar name as if to slowly get used to it, knowing you wouldn’t.
“Whitney, Kylar, come down here and properly greet your brother.”
One boy — you assumed to be Whitney, a little older than you, stood at the top of the oaky staircase, perched over the banister. Ruffled blonde hair and sharp blue eyes hidden behind his fringe, eyeing you with disinterest as he made his way down the creaking steps and over to you.
“Nice to meet you.” He grinned, taking ahold of your hand in his with what was evidently a faux smile, one that didn’t quite reach his mean eyes that matched his father, a lingering streak of maliciousness in them. Even his grip, barely restrained in its force, threatened to crush your hand before ultimately letting go.
“You too.” Forcing a smile back, both of you knew then, the stifling tension that brewed in the air — Neither of you were going to get along here.
“Hey freak, its your turn.”
Another, you had barely noticed, a smaller girl scuffling about in the background, anxiously fiddling with the ends of her oversized sleeves, skittish green eyes purposefully avoiding your gaze whenever you so much as glanced her way. That must be the only daughter, Kylar. Cute thing she was, though your mind couldn’t allow yourself to continue that stray thought any further considering the implications that’d involve after meeting your soon-to-be-step-sister. Fucking get your mind straight, will you?
“P-Pleasure to meet you..” In contrast to her brother’s confident strides, she shuffled towards you before clasping your soft palms together in a hold, weakly shaking it.
“..Pleasure is all mine.” You replied, matching her weirdly formal way of speaking.
Well, she didn’t seem so bad compared to the rest.
The introduction didn’t last very long, lacking any real warmth usually found between two shared families merging together as one. It felt more stiff than anything though you couldn’t spare the thought to think it any further, an ushered murmur said to make yourself at home.
As you made your way over to your new room, hauling your hefty luggage up the wooden stairs, something within the depths of your guts stirred from the shared eyes that bore into the shape of your back, intently observing your every move.
The walls here felt unbearably bare.
Like the people that lived in it.
Ironically enough, your new room was much bigger than your older one, leaving little room to complain as you did when your mother had announced you’d be moving into a new place. All the reasons, no matter how good had earned nothing but a gentle shake of her head, dead set on her decision to drag you along. And to say you hadn’t even told Robin you’d be moving away, best friends since childhood that shared everything between the two, except for this apparently. Imagining his freckled face, worry etched across his features had you wanting to go back to the town you knew, knowing you couldn’t.
Sighing lowly, you sat down onto your bed, hearing the slightest crinkle beneath your weight as you felt an uncomfortable, sharp lump underneath it. That.. Reaching for the covers, you threw aside the thick blankets that covered the suspicious looking lump, revealing fresh packets of condoms haphazardly scattered across the sheets and an old, raunchy magazine displaying a cute-looking school boy getting brutally fucked against the lockers by his own bully.
Heat burned your face at the lewd sight, quickly shoving your little “gift” under your pillow so you couldn’t spare another glance at it. Fucking bastards and their sick jokes, “gifting” you shit like that.
You weren’t like them. Fucking perverts.
Were you?
Whitney was the first to change that.
From the first time he laid his eyes on you, you knew then what he thought of you, distaste apparent over his features, the slight curve of his upper lip curled into a snarl. It was obvious, your step-brother didn’t like you. Shit, maybe hate would be a more appropriate word for the things he’d do. Whitney had made it clear from the get-go, the empty names you’d call each other were utterly meaningless, rarely slipping past his own lips. ‘Little brother’. Fuck, you were a pain in his side more than anything else, dropping by unannounced into his life just like that simply because your shitty mother happened to divorce, meeting his dead beat father who then strung up with yours.
The blonde didn’t attempt to hide his obvious disapproval of your presence in his house, blatantly knocking his shoulder into yours whenever he passed by, mouth cruelly drawn into a snide grin as you toppled down to the cold, hard, wooden floor with a dull thud. The bullying didn’t stop there either, often encountering the delinquent in the school hallways, surrounded by his usual cronies that stuck to his side like a bunch of desperate, panting puppies, eager for his approval. They simply wouldn’t leave you alone, went through your damn locker too, ransacking everything that sat in there before carelessly throwing aside the remnants into a nearby trash bin, left to fend for yourself.
Weak, useless. That’s what you were to him, and nothing else. Soon enough, he’d get rid of you, have you snap and run away, it was merely a matter of time.
Well, that was the initial plan he had made up in his mind — Too fucking bad for the poor bully that life didn’t go always as planned, not when he caught you fresh out of the shower, worn towel snugly tucked around yours hips, a bit lower and he’d catch a glimpse of your— Fucking snap out of it, Whitney! The fresh droplets of water that’d trickle down the curve of your back, cascading over the smooth surface before gently dripping onto the fuzzy carpet below. Fuck. Didn’t help that he was staring a tad bit too hard, forcing himself to tear his gaze away from your bare form shamelessly displayed before him. You were doing this on purpose, weren’t you? Tryna get him all distracted, fill his thoughts with nothing but your thighs sticky with his cum, your lips lightly parted to obediently suck on his fat cock, lapping away at the beads of pre-cum that trickled over the curved length.
Knew he had cracked the second his hand had reached for his cock, fisting his dick for all it was worth, hem of his shirt roughly held between his teeth as he jerked himself stupid to the thought of you. His annoying little brother, fucking bitch, oblivious to the effects you had on him whenever he came with a stifled curse, several strings of cum that’d messily splatter across the curve of his toned stomach and his cotton sheets, staining it.
You, of course, lay ignorant to his frequent glances trailing over your frame, mistaking it for the hostility he had shown you over the past few weeks. You were partially right, except this time it was out of frustrated lust, cock stirring beneath his ripped jeans at the mere sight of his younger sibling now. God, not even the dumb whores that’d sloppily suck him off in the grimy bathroom stalls between classes did it for him anymore, eyes shut in a haze to imagine it was your mouth instead wrapped around the tip of his cock.
Dumb slut. Dumb fucking slut you were, didn’t know what he had in store for you. Take it as payback from having infested his mind with thoughts of you that stray to other thoughts and to other.. that’d eventually end in the same scenario, fucking your slutty mouth wide open.
Yeah.. Actually having you choke down on his cock didn’t sound half-bad now that he thought about it.
So why not make it happen?
It had been a mistake then to accept his offer over drinks, get to know each other better, he had cheerfully claimed with a friendly arm wrapped around your shoulder. Bullshit. Think he gave a shit about that? The only ache in his mind had gone straight down to his slowly hardening cock underneath his grey sweats as his plan was brought into motion, insistently pouring more and more of his friends stolen bottle into your cup until you had lost track of the exact number. Prideful as ever, you had gulped it all down, unrelenting despite the nausea that had crept in your guts and the dizzying blur of your vision.
A hint of a rosy flush had started to spread throughout your skin, lightly dusting your cheeks with half-lidded eyes intently gazing back at your older brother’s slouched form atop the cushioned couch. The dribbling liquid sloshed lazily in the glassy bottle that threatened to spill from your weakened grasp on it. TV faintly flickering in the background, playing some outdated show that had since long been forgotten by the two of you, leaving the remote abandoned on the coffee table.
“Cmon, don’t be such a baby.” Whitney would taunt whenever you hesitated in your sluggish movements, silently observing the rhythmic bobbing of your throat as you took quick shots from your half-full glass. Lightweight, he mused in his mind.
“I’m not a baby.” You retorted back with that fucking cute pouty expression he adored.
Fuck. That’s the look. That goddamn look of yours he was waiting for. Nothing better than some arrogant slut all fucked up, practically begging to be taken on his own fucking couch.
“Yeah, sure. Whatever you say.”
“Whitney?” Shit, the way you’d call his name all whiny too, slipping past your own lips. Had his cock twitch like fucking hell, painfully aching between his spread legs.
“Hm? What is it?”
“Why are you so mean to me all the time?? What did I ever.. What did I ever do to you?? I—I just don’t get it.” You hiccuped pathetically, stumbling over your own words, already half-drunk from the fizzling alcohol in your system.
Ah, so you didn’t seem to get it at all yet, did you?
How cute.
“‘Cuz I wanna fuck your noisy mouth, that’s why.”
“..What?”
Blinking back at him, you didn’t even get the chance to register or mutter out another word before he was upon you. Knees firmly planted to each side, increasingly aware of his encompassing frame that towered overs yours as his clothed crotch faced your drunken expression. If it had been any other time, perhaps the blonde would’ve paused then to greedily drink in the sight before him, but this was Whitney after all and he never liked to waste time on silly notions like foreplay, preferring the rougher options that came along with it.
So, fuck it all, right?
With practiced ease, he hurriedly shucked down the elastic waistband of his grey sweats past his hips, hefty cock confidently springing free from the constricting confines of the cotton fabric as it lightly smacked against the curve of his bare stomach. Fuck, you haven’t had the slightest idea how long he had waited for this. Merely a matter of a few weeks for you, though for him, your older brother was dying to sink his dick in that whorish mouth of yours. Looked like you’ve never taken a real cock either, snugly shoved down to the hilt of your inexperienced throat that he’d train till it became a sixth sense to you, gratefully swallowing down his salty cum.
Calloused fingertips tenderly dragged along the swollen flesh of your bottom lip, bloodied cut reopening from the time the bully had split your face open on his fists for the whole school to see in the busied courtyard on a particularly rainy day. Licked his knuckles clean too after that rough beating you took, savouring the heady taste of the crimson mess you left behind, groaning all the while. Had him stupidly hard for the rest of the day, itching to relieve some tension once he got back home. Great times, really.
Now would’ve been the time then, probably— to sputter out your firm opposition over this, resist somewhat. Maybe kick the motherfucker in the balls, satisfyingly watch him writhe on the floor in agony before scrambling up the ancient staircase to hysterically yell about how you nearly got raped by your aforementioned step-brother, to your dozing mother. Christ, that would’ve been the sane decision to do then yet, the bubbling drinks coursing through your veins had thoroughly taken its effect on you, blood rushing down lower to the wrong region, the sinking realization nearly making you bolt upright.
Fucking fuck, you were hard.
And Whitney hadn’t failed to notice.
“Shit, are you getting hard from this?” The delinquent snickered hoarsely to himself, making a show to lightly tap at the growing bulge underneath your own jeans, all too visible despite the rough fabric that covered it. “Should’ve known you’d be into it. Your body speaks for itself, y’know. You want this, you cock whore craving slut.”
No, no. This was all wrong. Must’ve been. You liked girls, didn’t you? Squishy cunts and fat tits you could easily slip your cock into — god. Didn’t like guys and if you did, your step-brother who treated you like nothing but shit would’ve been last on the fucking list.
But you secretly do like being used this way, don’t you? Baby brother.
“I’m n-not fucking—“ Attempting to deny the harsh statement, you cut yourself off from the sudden intruding tip eagerly pressed against your lips, flushed cock head leaking thickly and smearing sticky pre-cum all over.
It wasn’t an order nor anything else that hung heavily in the air, a simple gesture, a subtle thrust of his hips that had his actions speak louder than any words would’ve been capable of. Either you do it or not, the delinquent couldn’t have cared less regardless, always used to getting what he wants and by god, if he wasn’t going to fucking get this. Because the signals alarmingly ringing through your head felt faint in the face of this, shakily inhaling the musky scent of your big brother’s throbbing cock subtly twitching in response to your feathered breaths against it, dribbling out more translucent pre-cum that melded with the scarlet stain of your bloodied lips.
Out of your damn mind — That’s what you were. To even properly consider the implication at hand here. Yet your lips won’t stop from parting, from sticking your pink tongue out, clumsily imitating the gestures of those submissive girls in the cheap porns you’d watch underneath your thin covers late at night, shamefully enough. Always thought you’d be on the receiving end of that one day, dutifully patting at the soft hair slotted between your thighs however here you were, shyly pawing at Whitney’s naked hips instead to steady yourself.
All your fault, all your damn fault so shut up and take it, alright? Shouldn’t have led him on like that, now you’re only reaping what you sow, slut.
A delighted sigh softly escaped from the blonde as you finally gave his dick some much needed attention, experimentally running the flat of your tongue along his leaking slit, coaxing out more dribbling fat globs of pre-cum before slowly and carefully taking his full girth in the warm depths of your tight, wet mouth. “Ah— Fuck. Yeah, that’s good.” No way can he hide the barely restrained, high-pitched, almost needy whimper that threatens to slither past him as you so prettily suck him down to the base, slobbering all over his throbbing balls that has him huffing out a cursed moan of satisfaction, eyes rolling back. “F-Fuckin’— god.” Can’t help the sheer guttural groan that slips out from how tightly his baby brother’s virgin lips sweetly glide around him, the uncertainty in your movements making it all the more endearing as you struggle to take him all in, saliva dripping over your chin to land in varying wet dots on the cushioned pillows. Looking so damn pretty like this with a mouthful of cock, your big brother’s pulsing cock specifically. So don’t blame him then when his hips automatically snap back, slender fingers instinctively reaching for the back of your head to entangle themselves through the soft strands of your hair, ruffling it.
Felt more like he was plainly fucking your mouth than you were sucking him off, sharp, punishing thrusts meeting your open mouthed lips to drive himself deeper in that warm throat that reflexively tightened around his length whenever he hit a particularly sensitive spot — drawing another string of adorable, strangled whimpers from you. “Shit, you sure this your first time? You’ve got the mouth of a — hah, fuckin’ filthy glory hole.” Heat prickling up the nape of your neck at the direct statement uttered, the brief realization of your inexperience being taken away like this, from a blowjob. On the giving end. A first, that will mostly likely not be the only first after this, not when you’re unconsciously getting off to the thought for more in store despite your haze filled brain begging you to reason. Ah, fuck. He’s gone and got you stupidly cock drunk now, didn’t he? The bastard. Slurred mutterings tumbling out above you, almost hasty in how he handles you, wanting to truly savor this never-ending moment when his body can’t stop on its own, too eager to be fulfilled of this yearning pleasure he sought out from you firstly. Thankful for your lack of gag reflex that somehow has you forcefully endure the ruthless slam of his hips, struggling grip straining onto his thighs to brace yourself, promising to leave a fresh set of bruising marks on the tanned flesh.
“Gon’ be my lil’ cockwhore, huh? My fuckin’ slut. Goin’ to be so good for— fuck, big brother, yeah?” If treating you so obscenely like this grants him the privilege to have you beneath him, so stupidly on your knees then, fuck, is it goddamn worth it. Every multicoloured bruise splotched along the length of your legs to your elbows, inflicted from his unfortunate beatings took on at every turn. The cold indifference muddled across your features warping to an earnest scowl from simply acknowledging his presence alone, precisely what he wants. To finally recognize your older brother, the churning fear instilling within you, forced to submit to him and worship him rightfully so.
It’ll be more than that though, the sick realization dawning upon him of this opportunity handed to him on a silver plater, free of his taking, of course. Not some other replaceable slut he can find anywhere else by chance, but one forcefully bound to him whether they like it or not since what can you possibly do? Come running with tears in your eyes to your mommy about what your big, mean, older brother did to you? His father will certainly not be one to help you for that matter, that’s for damn sure. Who the hell will believe you then? No one. Fucking nobody. Inadvertently handing him free range to do whatever he so pleases with you, whenever, where the fuck ever. Oh, but it won’t only stop there, y’know. Ruining you fully for the sake of his own selfish pleasure, corrupt that naive view of yours that has you blush bashfully at a bunch of lewd illustrations plastered onto the printed pages. Soon enough, the majority of your days will be lazily spent in his room, leaking cock dribbling profusely from the kitten licks you’ll so cutely give him then while he absentmindedly scrolls on his phone, grinning proudly as you inevitably beg for more of him. And shit, Whitney isn’t one to disappoint either — he’ll have you rightfully rewarded for such behaviour, in public to be exact. Clip a nice, leathered collar around your neck along with a leash too, tug at it a bit to show off his newfound pet, his loyal little brother that sloppily sucks him off and happily sinks onto his hefty cock at a mere snap of his fingers. Drives him fuckin’ crazy merely thinking about it.
That’s right, suck on your big brother’s fat cock to selfishly earn his twisted love, his blind adoration and protection of your being. His pet. His slut. His beloved baby brother. His now blood, flesh and soul tainted thoroughly by him himself. Personally service him on your knees like the whore that he knows you are. Fucking get on your knees and earn it.
All too soon, despite wanting to stretch this further solely to ingrain the addictive noises of your stifled whimpers and drooling mouth inside his perverted mind, visibly struggling to take him all in as he shamelessly used your throat like some sort of flesh light stretched to the hilt — He can feel himself reach the brink of his limit, confident hips stuttering in their steady thrusts to greedily bury the tip of his quivering cock into the back of your throat one last time. “F-Fuck. Stay like that — just fucking stay like that.” He hissed sharply between strained curses, head thrown back like some cheap virgin whore who’s just received his first ever mind blowing blow job. The familiar overwhelming heat curling in the curve of his belly, like a coiling string on the verge of popping. Balls tightening in need, pulsing spurts of his fat load squirting out of the head of his cock to messily splatter across the surface of your pretty fucking face, ruining you for his own amusement.
Should’ve busted his load down your throat just to hungrily watch you swallow it down, though he supposes that the cum stained look adorning your pretty face is a sight to behold on its own, taking a good minute to appreciate the mess before him.
A blank, pristine canvas that he had helped ruin and stain with the filth of his very own actions.
It suits you, really.
“That’s a — hah, good boy.” Whitney heaved roughly between ragged breaths, the uncharacteristically gentle praise laced in his tone differing from his usually sadistic nature. If it weren’t for the sticky mess that obscured your vision along with the heat of his sweating palm placed flat across your forehead, you’d notice the strange fond, warmth that had settled into his softening gaze, a sort of reverence in of itself. “My good fucking boy.”
“So good for big brother, aren’t you?” He smirks knowingly at your hitched gasps of breaths, struggling so stupidly to form back a snarky insult as per usual.
Ah, he gets it now — really fucking gets it, glazed over eyes settling onto your evidently hard, twitching cock still tented pitifully against the front of your jeans, frantically humping at the air like some sort of rabid, horny and untrained puppy in heat, tongue lolling out. Aw, so fuckin’ cute when you’re cock drunk and needy for big brother. Makes him wanna do it all over again.
For that, he should be properly training you then.
“Whitney— fuckin’ cmon, please.” Whining so pathetically in a way that sends a jolt straight down through his spent cock, immediately standing up to attention once more. You’re really asking for it, fuck.
So damn cute, but so impatient too. Maybe he should fuck your virgin ass next, stuff it full of his cum and see what happens to that bratty mouth of yours then. Shut you up a bit.
“Yeah, yeah. I got it. Just— keep still for me.”
Well, can’t be having his little new pet go frustratingly neglected like that, can he?
Kylar, your precious little sister, all too eager to be the first, but the second to sink her mark into you. Convince you a bit more.
Needy as she was, she wasn’t as bad as the rest that inhabited this sick place you reluctantly called home, a flicker of warmth among the distant coldness that resided in this house. Much unlike her brother, the dark haired girl didn’t seem to dislike you in the slightest, often shooting you the smallest of smiles whenever you two briefly locked eyes at the dinner table or in the shared hallways by mere coincidence.
‘Course, she did have her questionable moments whenever you caught her rifling through your drawers, namely the ones where your underwear lay neatly folded in the cubicle space. Promptly muttering out an unbelievable excuse as to why she needed your boxers before bolting past your stunned self, red in the face. Or that time she had decided to curl up onto your bed, lovingly burying her nose into the warm, silken sheets that you slept in, relishing in that sweet scent of yours she’d catch a whiff of as you drew closer next to her at the table.
..Yeah, she certainly had unresolved issues, but it beat the constant poking fun at that Whitney would do. The rough shoving into the metallic lockers that’d clank heavily from your weight, the shared snickering that came along with it and the forced blow jobs that you had somehow eased into over time despite yourself. Fuck, why were you even thinking of that asshole?
Freak or not, she didn’t harbour any of the senseless cruelty this town had to selflessly offer and that was good enough. Enough so that you had found yourself increasingly spending more and more of your time with Kylar whenever you weren’t forcibly dragged along to some shoddy place your big brother roped you into, leaving the loner to her own whims for the day.
So it was no surprise then when the two of you grew closer, a little more than you had expected so to be the one sat onto her worn out bed, her hideaway — she’d call it, a moment of respite from the constant teasing she had to go through from her older brother. A means of escape, perhaps? And for you, it was no different either, all the same. Gladly listening to her overexcited rambling about this and that, about the fine mangas she had newly bought at the local, dusty library, the half priced anime figurines she had found on display beyond the glassy windows that separated them — matching pearly bracelets made of shiny gems and rocks carefully picked at the park she’d sow together to gleefully tuck around your wrist, whining sorrowfully at her own being too loose for her delicate wrists. Cute. Your little sister was real fucking cute, more so than you’d like to admit at times.
So much so you couldn’t ignore the growing knots in the pit of your stomach whenever your knees fortuitously bumped against each other, a sign — a silent, repetitive warning of your shared proximity that was crossing past the treacherous line of two mere siblings. Yeah. Okay. So you found her cute, so what? Big fucking deal. Plenty of guys found a girl cute, didn’t mean jack shit, didn’t mean they wanted to fuck her till she clenched pathetically around them, sniffling miserably at being fucked brutally by their kind, soft-spoken big brother they naively put their trust into. Right, that’s what you were. Nothing more. A responsible big brother she could certainly put her faith into since her other piece of shit brother couldn’t bother with that shitty role, something you’d curse him for on the daily. One she could seek out at a moment’s notice, spend time with to her heart’s content like a normal, unsuspecting relationship between siblings should be.
Not some perverted creep of a big brother who’d steal periodic glances her way, instinctively trailing down to the soft, plump and pink flesh of her parted lips, glistening sinfully from the wetness of her saliva — a habit she unconsciously did despite claiming not to. Gulping thickly, you hadn’t registered how her seamless chatter had ceased to a stop, deafening silence befalling upon the both of you as you stared at each other like some sort of stiff actors awaiting for the next act on stage. Wait, were you staring? Fuck, you were — and she hadn’t failed to notice by the looks of it, blooming flush adorning her pretty, pale cheeks you’d like to press gentle, reassuring kisses to, squeeze under the weight of your palm. Maybe have her spill a few stray droplets of tears across the rosy surface while you’re at it, make her cry the same way Whitney did.
Oh, you’re such a fucking bastard for this one.
“W-What is it? Do I have something on my face?” Her sudden squeak had you stilling in your tracks, twisting the spread sheets without meaning to from the timid pitch of her shrill voice. Look at her, trying to hide behind her torn sleeves in an attempt to draw attention away from her bashful blush, becoming a fidgeting mess under your gaze.
Fuck, no. It was more than that, Kylar. It was the pout of your lips that you wore, the black strands of hair that frames your face so beautifully, the exposed sliver of skin of your thighs from that short skirt you slipped on. It was all you, but dammit all — fuck.
“Hm? No, it’s nothing — really.” Liar. Drawing back to create a manageable amount of space between you both, a reminder not to act upon those disgusting urges of yours, better not to. Bad idea to be thinking with your dick, no man’s ever made a reliable decision with that one. Even so, Whitney did it with you and — nothing particularly bad happened, did it? Would it be so wrong, if you were to do the same? Selfishly grasp for what you so dangerously desire, drop meaningless hints here and there to care for her wants, such a gentler option than any other boy could ever treat your dearest little sister?
Would it?
Too lost in your endless train of thoughts, your eyes connecting with Kylar’s green own that bore with such intensity you hadn’t seen before, almost as if contemplating — no, waiting for something to happen. Though you couldn’t tell what it was, her actions were enough so to speak on their own with how she shifted considerably towards you, used mattress dipping from the creaking weight over the wooden floorboards. Ah, was she..?
“Ky—?”
Before your mind was even fully given the chance to process it, like the leap taken before the shuddering dip of a waterfall, her inexperienced, virgin lips clumsily smashed into yours, knocking the wind out of the both of you from the abrupt step taken by your little sister. Sweet. So sweet. Pink tongue tentatively swiping along the scarlet cut of your bottom lip, ushered gasps accompanied by startled squeaks as she timidly gave you what she thought was a simple kiss, but felt more like a pornographic make out session with how she so desperately shoved her tongue deeper. More. Wants more of this, more of that honeyed taste she yearned to savour, to finally enjoy while her other dumb brother so greedily took you away every time she wished to be the one at your side instead. It wasn’t fair, not fair at all! He’s so mean, so why does he get to string you along whenever he so pleases? Should be her, only be her to fill that solemn space. Only her, only her—
“W-Wait, wait— Kyl— fuck.”
As if struck by the weight of what she had just done, the loner recoiled back instantly in a fit of panic from the sheer brashness of her actions. Oh, how could she let herself so easily fall to such temptations? What if you hated her now? Or worse, were repulsed by the kiss? Wouldn’t be able to live it down then, quivering lips and bubbling tears threatening to spill freely down the length of her flushing cheeks from her overactive imagination running rampant — because she’d rather die than to have you loathe her so.
“I-I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to— umm.. I thought that maybe you.. wanted me to—“ The girl stuttered uselessly, trailing off in an aimless direction only to shrink back in her unbecoming position. Silence only answered her in return which she took as the harsh reality of rejection, mustering up all the courage she possibly had in her lithe frame to at the very least subtly peek at the current expression painted along your face. Would it be anger? Disgust? Disappointment even? Surely if you hated it that much, you’d have plainly kicked her right off the bed by now, right? Storm out in a fit of shock and never so much as glance her way again.
The sight to greet her instead wasn’t an unwelcome one though — no, far from it actually, her gaze deliberately falling upon the blazing flush of your face down to the evident bulge straining painfully between your legs, palm nervously placed over it in a half-assed attempt to keep your dignity at bay — shit. It’s one thing to be kissed by your younger sister but to get fucking hard from it is like shameful admission on its own, a visceral reaction that could not be denied no matter what reasonable excuses may tumble from your lips. “..It’s fine. I don’t mind, actually.” You’re really no better than Whitney in that aspect, but when an opportunity presents itself, it’s only fair to mindlessly grasp for it, is it not? More worrying is the debauched idea that forms in your mind in regard to the enamoured expression worn by her wobbly lips and wide-eyed look, not-so-subtly rubbing her plush thighs together in a hint of arousal. Oh, so that’s how it is. If the sloppy kiss itself didn’t confirm it then this surely did, a surge of confidence rushing momentarily through your body at your next actions. “Like I said, it���s fine, Ky.” That fucking nickname again. Unable to stop yourself from dragging your cute little sister closer towards you till she consequently found herself comfortably placed onto your lap, blinking stupidly at the bold move done by her normally gloomy, big brother. Silly girl.
“Siblings do it all the time, it’s not weird. It’s natural.” Lying through your goddamn teeth with a certain ease that even surprises you internally, but oh, is it so worth it as her viridescent eyes glimmer brightly to the whispered reassurance in your casual tone, acceptance easily slipping through. “But Whitney and I don’t—“ She starts, only for you to immediately latch onto her endless questioning with the seed having already been planted, too late to fucking back out now. “You and I are different. I’m nice to you and you’re nice to me, so it’s normal if you want to. We can do that cuz’ everyone else does it, alright? You don’t have to be shy with me about it, Ky.” Every carefully measured word to make it seem as though this was the norm, knowing fully you’d be seen as freaks and degenerates by your peers attending the nearby school. Not that they didn’t already think so with Kylar, the rumors having grown out to such an unhealthy proportion that it pestered the poor girl at every corner in the narrow hallways. Poor thing.
So isn’t it your job as her big brother to make it all go away? Make her feel better.
“Shh, just let me..” Soothing circles rhythmically rubbed in a recognizable pattern along the edges of her skirt, repeated affirmations of want so as to ease her chattering mind over the possible morality of this newfound situation. Could’ve said no if she didn’t secretly desire this, though her actions seem to say so otherwise with how she earnestly complies, willingly tucking her arms to her sides to let your hands do the rest. Good girl. So docile, like a porcelain doll, sharpening breaths noticeably deepening from the careful tugs of her short skirt, revealing the confirmation of her depraved wants as the wet patch of slick soaking through her plain, white panties is bared. Your adorable little sister isn’t so innocent as you thought, is she? Contrary to her modest choice of underwear. Getting fucking wet solely from being leered at so openly by her step brother, even going so far as to spread her soft legs for better viewing.
“See? Isn’t it frustrating to be left all worked up like this?” Agreeing nods promptly interrupted by the press of your thumb against her clothed slit, such a sweet, hitched gasp elicited from the lazy circles traced onto her swollen, twitching clit. A free view of your younger sister’s scrunched up expression morphing to one of pure, unadulterated pleasure, scarred fingertips tightly clutching at the fabric of your shirt, but that’s the least of your concerns at the moment, really. “This good?” There’s no real need to ask when you can naturally rely on the shivering of her dainty figure, breathy moans of y-yes and feels good! along with the guiding of her needy fingers, flush against her slicked heat. A flick of your thumb is all it takes to have her turn into a babbling mess, bucking her hips up to meet your cupped palm, incidentally grinding onto your aching hard-on. “S-Shit, okay. Look at you, hah — so fucking wet already.” Barely able to discern the own pitch of your voice, but who the fuck is supposed to properly maintain their composure when your little sister is so prettily begging for your cock?
Effortlessly peeling away at the sticky fabric of her cotton panties, slipping it down the length of her legs to thoughtlessly throw away onto the wooden floor beneath. No time to fucking think, not with how cute her cunt looks, pink and dripping with slick coating the smooth surface of her inner thighs. Ah, and she’s already impatiently fumbling with your belt too, smiling so happily once it loosens to eventually tug your own underwear down too, leaking cock eagerly springing free from its restraints. “Want it that bad, lil sis?” Fuck, does it feel wrong to even be calling her so in your current predicament, yet so damn right too. The pleading nods, urgently clinging to your frame to press against as she grinds her sopping cunt along your flushed tip, whining whenever it knocks just right up against her puffy clit, squelching from the melding fluids. “W-Want it, want it inside, please.”
“B-Big brother—“
As much as you like the high-pitched mumblings of your dearest Kylar, there’s really only so much edging you can take before promptly snapping your hips up in tandem with her own, relishing in the slippery warmth that lovingly welcomes you, stretched folds accommodating to the sheer girth of your length. “Oh, fuck — Fuck, just relax for me. You feel so.. hah, so good.” Collectively sighing in relief at the intrusion of your pulsing cock squeezed so nicely by her constricting walls, having to steel yourself from the tight suck of her cunt snugly wrapped around your tip. “You’re doing so good for me, taking me so well.” Softly hushing her breathy whines intertwined with a mix of pain and pleasure, fingertips digging harshly in the tender flesh of her hips to guide her quivering frame up and down the length of your cock. Isn’t this what she wanted after all? Such a quick learner too, steadily bouncing to match the pace you had set, your wandering hands slipping past the hem of her loose shirt to greedily palm at her perky breasts which prompts another moan to exit her parted lips. Uncaring for the increasingly noticeable squeaking of the worn mattress when your little sis is so cutely riding you, doing her very best to satisfy your immoral urges and have you mark her slicked insides with your seed.
“What a good sister.. So good, aren’t you?” Cute, pink tongue poking out, begging for another messy kiss pressed onto her swollen lips which you dutifully oblige with another muffled groan. Sloppily planting your own against hers, treasuring every shuddered gasp to swallow down and stifling her open mewls. It’s borderline disgusting how desperate you are, savouring every thick inch engulfed by the sloppy suck of her baby sister pussy, reappearing briefly only to bury yourself balls deep once more into her defiled cunt. Isn’t really your fault with how fucking tight she is, is it? Barely grasping the reality of the situation which is the very high possibility of being heard from outside her room right this moment, but fuck — you can’t slow down, not right now, not when you’re already on the verge of spilling your cum deep inside. Damn Whitney, the bastard. Damn to hell your parents, your indecisive mother and her new husband, this is heaven itself right here. “I’m close—“ You huff out in a sort of warning, though it’s more of an invitation to Kylar, an opportunity for you to shoot your thick seed in her wanting hole, practically locking her legs tight around your waist.
Anything for you after all, huh? Her beloved. Her darling. You just didn’t know it yet! And to say it came true on its own, openly enjoying the sensation of your fat cock instinctively fucking into her tight, little sister hole. So close.
“Cum inside me, please. Let’s finish together, big brother. I-I’m close too—“
And that’s all you really need, precise thrusts upwards hastily turning into erratic humps to lazily grind against her ass, wanting nothing more but to see the dumb, drooling, fucked out expression painted across her adorable face, the convulsing of her cunt stuffed full of your length when she does have her first ever orgasm. A few clumsy circles drawn over her used clit is all it takes to have her cumming, slick trickling out of her fluttering cunt to drip over the base of your cock and stain the pristine sheets beneath. “Ah— God, you’re so fucking tight.” Fuck, fuck, fuck — Shoving the hilt of your cock as deep as possible into your little sister’s stretched out hole to rightfully mark her pink insides with your seed, spurting out thick, white strings of cum while you fuck yourself deeper into her womb and downright have her experience her first ever accidental cream pie too. It’s only then when she pitifully whines for you to stop that you do eventually pause, hips drawing back to stare in awe at the dribbling globs of cum spilling out of her sore cunt. “S-Sorry.” You mutter out apologetically with a sigh, the tension easing out of your muscles once she giggles softly in response to your strained apology. “It’s okay. I-I liked it a lot too.”
“Did you?”
“Mhm, I did.” Kylar sleepily mumbles back with drowsy eyelids, the exhaustion washing both over you all at once from, well.. all the movement involved. Let’s leave it at that, actually. Plus you deserve the rest, don’t you? Wouldn’t be fair to leave your adorable sister all alone in her twin bed without her older brother’s body to warm it with too, yeah? It’s fine to lay yourself down next to her curled figure snuggling closely against yours, drape an arm over her waist to remind her of your presence close by, make her feel secure and at ease. A silent, ushered promise to clean her up later once you two awaken, affectionately pressing a single kiss atop her head one last time before sleep takes her first. It’s your role to as the big brother, after all, isn’t it?
“..Good.”
338 notes · View notes
jessjad · 2 days
Text
More than this
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Summary: Y/N and Dean have been together for a while now, but she's not sure if this is going any further. More and more it feels like he only wants one thing from her and Y/N isn't sure if she can continue to give it to him.
Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader
Word count: 4417
Warnings: 18+ only!!! some smutty smutness (a little rougher in the beginning), a little heartbreak, some angst, fluff and some realizations
A/N: Hello! 😊 So, I had this idea in my head and I really wanted to write it out, but I had to redo it a couple of times until I got it right. Get ready for some feelings. All mistakes are mine!
My Masterlist
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"You like this, right?"
Dean murmured roughly into Y/N's ear while he kept pounding her hard into the matress. She was laying underneath him, legs around his hips and taking his rough thrusts with accompanying moans. Yeah, she liked it. Dean knew just how to make her come, how to manhandle her, but she could not answer him. In a way she just wanted it to be over. He kept talking dirty to her and started to grib her throat lightly. With his other hand he took one of her calves and brought her leg up on his shoulder to change the angle, to get even deepr into her heat.
"Oh, I know you like this, sweetheart. Hitting every sensitive spot insight you while I fuck you really hard. Just to keep you on edge." he increased the pressure on her throat a little and started to circle her clit with his thump.
Y/N began to feel a little anxious about the hand on her throat and gripped his wrist with some fear, but that was something that Dean didn't notice while he was chasing his own release. Y/N was sure that he would never hurt her, but that was something knew. Something she actually did not like.
She felt the pressure build in her core and the heat that started to rise up in her body took her mind of the current situation that bothered her. Dean lavished on her nipples with his tounge, intensifying the pressure and in the moment when he let go of her throat, the coil snapped and she came hard on his cock. Screaming his name, Dean's movements began to falter and he too came undone, releasing his sticky seed and filling her to the brim.
The Winchester rolled down of her and layed himself right next to her. Relishing in the feeling of the post sexual bliss, both their breahts came hard while their racing hearts were trying to calm themselfs down again. He closed his eyes and smiled before he turned to the woman next to him, to see how she felt. With one arm drapped over her stomache he gave her a sweet kiss on the cheek, but Y/N didn' react in any way.
"You okay there, sweetheart?" he asked and looked closely at her.
Upon hearing his voice, a smile appeared on her lips and she turned her head to Dean. "Yeah, all good."
To not have to look him into the face much longer she scooded over to him and buried her face in the crook of his neck. Now, laying in his warm embrace and hearing his heartbeat, she felt safe, good. Once this rough side of Dean was gone, she wanted to be as close to him as she could. This is what she wanted to experience more with him and she probably should just talk to him. But she didn't know how. And if she was honest, this was somehow all her fault.
When she met Dean for the first time, she was hooked right away. He had put on a charming smile that reached his beautiful green eyes and right away she felt like a fly who was drawn to the light. Although she couldn't really believe that he was actually attracted to her. She was no model and definitly not perfect, but that didn't seem to bother him at all. And so she had no problem to share her bed with him the first night and it was really beautiful.
A string of dates followed in which they got to know each other better and better and they also kept up their nightly activities underneath the sheets. After a month it felt right and Y/N started to fall for the tall man. Her heart began to yearn for him and she could only hope that he was starting to feel the same way. She felt so comfortable with him, because he seemed to genuinely like her just the way she was. And that led to the situation they now found themselves in.
One night, while they were about to make the bed shake again, she had brought it up that she likes it a little harder sometimes. And Dean, the gentleman that he was, tried to do justice to her wishes. In the beginning they tested it out and at some point they found a grove with eachother. It was fun.
But now, over six months later, this was all there was left. Hard, rough sex. No sweet feelings or romance. And also no emotional intimacy. Even the dates had stopped. They only met at her place or, like right now, here in the bunker at Dean's place.
Y/N knew about his actual job and eventhough she didn't want to get involved with it, it didn't bother her. Dean was saving lives, he was a warior. A frecking hero! And that just made her fall for him even harder. But after all this time, she still didn't know if he was falling in love with her too.
Long after Dean felt asleep, Y/N was still lying awake in bed. There was to much going on in her head. She looked over to Dean and tears began to burn in her eyes. As much as she liked the man next to her, this was not what she wanted. Sometimes he was so secretive and she felt like she didn't even know him. It was as if he didn't want to let her into his heart. As if he didn't want to let her share his feelings.
And so, Y/N knew what she needed to do. She needed to get out of here for a while. Needed to get away from Dean and this entrenched situation. A little distance would probably be the best for now. And with this resolution she stood up. Quietly, to not wake up Dean, she put on her clothes and grabbed her stuff. With one last glance back she decided to write him a little note and a minute later she was out of his bedroom.
On her way out of the bunker she passed by the kitchen. The lights were on and when she looked into the room, she saw Sam sitting on the table, his laptop infront of him and a fresh cup of coffee next to it. He looked up after hearing steps, but smiled as soon as he saw it was Y/N.
"Hey! You still awake?" Y/N asked as soon as Sam noticed her.
"Yeah! Yeah, Cas just called. He is on a case in Michigan and needed some help. So, I try to find him some answers."
Y/N only nodded as she took a few steps into the kitchen and smiled. She admired the cohesion the boys shared. They always helped eachother out if needed. Sam on the other hand noticed her backpack that hung from her right sholder and frowned a litte.
"Are you going somewhere? It's still early in the morning?" the younger Winchester asked and directed his attention fully to her.
"Oh, ehm..." Y/N needed to think fast, 'cause she didn't want to lie to Sam. "... I totally forgot that a good friend of mine invited me to her birthday party tomorrow. And since she lives in Jamestown..."
Upon that realization Sam nodded his head. "... it's a long drive to North Dakota."
"Yup." she agreed.
And it was not even a lie. Her friend Lizzy would celebrate her birthday, but just not for four days. Y/N had already texted her friend to let her know, that she would be there a little earlier and when Lizzy would read the message in a few hours she definitly wouldn't mind it. Since they haven't seen eachother in a long time.
"You know, you could've taken a flight down there too." he suggested and stood up from his place.
"Yeah, but I... actually like to drive. You know? Blasting my music, rolled down windows and the wind blows through my hair..."
"Alright, alright." Sam chuckled. "Dean says the same things, so I get it."
Now it was Y/N who laughed a little. But just the thought of the man who owned her heart, stung to some degree. Maybe she should've just talked to him, instead of running away, but she really didn't know how. The one thing she didn't want, was to mess their relationship up. If this even was a relationship.
"Doesn't Dean at least say goodbye to you?" the tall man questioned, while he looked out into the hallway.
"No!" she blurted out way to fast, what gave her an confused look of Sam. "No, but it's okay. We... have been really busy... you know? So... he needs his beauty sleep."
She said and did some randomly gestures with her hands, so that Sam knew right away what she exactly meant. He cleared his throat and scratched the back of his head, getting a little shy.
"Okay, alright. I don't wanna know... that... actually."
They both laughed and inside Y/N were relieved, that he seemed to believe her. Both of them fell silent again and before she could change her mind, Y/N moved forward and hugged Sam goodbye.
"Don't be up to long. Get some sleep, okay?"
Sam hugged her back, the weird feeling in his gut ignoring for now.
"Don't worry, Y/N. I will."
And without looking back again, she made her way down to the garage to get into her car and leave Lebanon behind her.
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Dean didn't know what startled him awake, but when he opend his eyes, the sun had just begun to rise over the horizon. He searched his bedside with his hand automatically, but his eyes followed right away. The place where Y/N had slept just some hours ago was already empty. And cold. Only a little note was laying on the pillow, saying that she was gone for a few days. He sat up and noticed right away that her clothes and backpack were gone, too. What was going on?
The older Winchester got out of his bed and went out into the hallway to look for his girlfriend. But he didn't get to far before Sam appeared infront him on his way to his room, yawning his heart out.
"Hey!" he made himself known. "Have you seen Y/N?"
"Oh, hey Dean." answered Sam a little confused and stopped in his tracks when he reached his brother. "She... went out to her friend. Did she... did she not tell you that?"
Dean huffed. "All I got is this little piece of paper." holding the note up to show it to Sam.
"Dean... did something happen between the two of you?"
"What? No!" he blurted out right away, but the look on Sam's face got him a little worried. "Why?"
Sam relaxed his shoulders a little and shook his head in thought. "I don't know... I've met her in the kitchen before she went out and... I had a weird feeling. You know? She... she didn't seem herself... in a way. As if she... was a little on edge?"
"What?" now Dean was confused. "But eveything was fine when we went to sleep."
To that Sam had no idea what else he could say and a weird silence fell between the two men.
"Alright. I'll try calling her. Thanks, Sam."
"Oh, not... not at all."
But Dean didn't hear that anymore. He was already back in his room, grabbing for his phone.
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Y/N was finally able to breath. It was a freeing feeling that she had really needed. Lizzy was surprised that she came over so early for her birthday but she didn't complain either. They had know each other for so many years now, that she was happy to get some alone time with her dear friend.
The only times that Y/N felt a little bit guilty was when Dean texted or tried to call her. She was still not ready to take his calls, because she knew that she would give in the second she heared his beautiful voice. She missed him, though. A lot. She missed him so much, that her heart hurt and screamed his name. So that's why she only answerd his messages, eventhough her answers were short and vague. He knew now where exactly she was, but she also asked of him to wait for her to come back. That she just wanted to spent some long needed time with her friends. And he accepted it.
Now, the birthday party was in full swing and banished her bad thoughts. They all laughed, drank a little and just had a really good time. The girls were sitting outside in the backyard of Lizzys house and enjoyed the fairly warm weather. The hours were passing by quickly and for the first time in the last months Y/N felt carefree. But the later the evening got and the more alcohol flowed, the more intimate the conversations became.
Late at night, there were only Lizzy, Y/N and Cathy, another good friend of the girls, left. And Cathy was very expressive, especially about men. She had just told some funny anecdotes about her past relationships and they were all laughing a good amount. But she also talked about her problems with the new man in her life, named Mike. He was older than her and they came from two very different backrounds. But love had still struck them.
"So, it's all good now? With you and Mike?" Lizzy asked.
"Yeah! Yeah, I talked to him. I just had to and he understood it."
Lizzy saw the lightly confused look on Y/N's face and explained. "Cathy had a little problem with their sexlife and she was debating for quite some time if she should say something or not."
'Huh...' Y/N thought. As it seemed she was not the only one who had those problems.
"Our sex was really boring, you know? Like, reeeeaaaally booooring. I mean, I like it slow and intense sometimes, too. It's not a bad thing. But I also really needed the rough sex. You know? When you're just so pent up and you need to release some stress... a good hard pounding can do wonders, right? " Cathy continued speaking and laughed. "And you two know me. I've always been open about what I like and what not. But with Mike... it was difficult, you know?"
"And how did it... go?" Y/N asked.
She didn't know why she asked that, when she didn't even want to talk about it. But maybe this was the right moment. Maybe she should take advantage of this moment and talk to her friends about her problems too.
"Good, actually. Well, I was really nervous in the beginning, 'cause I truly like the guy, you know? But That was also the reason why I wanted to talk to him."
"Yeah..." Y/N agreed, but had to think about her own situation with Dean. Maybe she made this all into a much bigger thing than it acutally was. "...yeah."
But Lizzy noticed the change in her friend right away. She saw the change in her mood and it got her worried a bit. She had asked Y/N about Dean and how their relationship developed, but she didn't fully answer her question.
"Y/N? You okay?"
That question brought back her attention to her friends and she sat herself up a little straighter.
"Yes... I am." she tried to mask it, but Cathy saw right through it.
"Well, THAT sounded convincing..." Cathy turned around and asked silently for an explanation.
"Y/N, girl... you can talk to us." Lizzy tried and then Y/N just felt the urge to talk to her friends what was on her mind.
"Okay, okay, ehm..." now she felt ridicoulous in a way. "Dean and I... it's mostly good, you know? We get along really well and he swepped me of my feet right away..." she smiled, but that faded quickly.
"There is just one thing... and I don't know what to do abut it..." she shook her head and took a sip of her wine, like trying to steal herself. "I get what you're saying, Cathy. About the rough sex and all. I do like that too, but..."
She felt so awkward talking about this, but she also knew that her friends would not judge her or talk her down in any way. And maybe they could give her advice on how to navigate that ship safely into the haven.
"Okay, I'm just gonna say it." with a deep sigh Y/N kept talking. "When I first talked to Dean about the things I like in bed I also told him that I do like it rough sometimes. And with a charming smile he tried to live up to that. We tried different things until we found a grove we both liked, you know?"
Lizzy and Cathy shared a quick look as if they already knew what was coming next over her lips.
"But since then... rough and hard sex is all that's left. It's like... nothing else is existing anymore. We stopped going on dates, we are not talking to eachother anymore like we did in the first few months... all we do when we meet is eat something and then... on into the bedroom."
"Y/N..." Cathy said, but the woman continued talking.
"Don't get me wrong: He is not hurting me or forcing himself on to me or any of that. Not at all. I do like that kind of sex and he knows my body like a violin. But... it feels like it's just sex and nothing more. No romance, no emotional intimacy, no... connection. You know what I mean? And I miss that. I miss the slow, passionate sex. The lingering touches and the soft kisses... we don't have that anymore."
"Do you love him?" Cathy asked after a moment where noone knew what to say and Y/N did not have to think about it.
"Yeah. I do." and that truth hurt.
"Then you should definitly talk to him. Tell him how you feel and that you need more. This is not something you can just... sit out, you know?"
"But... that's the problem. I... I just don't know how. He seems so content and I don't wanna ruin our relationship by causing an maybe unnecessary problem."
"But it's never unnecessary to talk about the way you feel and try to improve your relationship with him. And when Dean loves you too, then he should have no problems with that, right?" Lizzy asked.
Y/N wanted to agree. It made so much sense hearing this from her friends and now she was wondering why she did not just try it. She was even questioning her behavier right know in leaving Dean and not telling him why. Her mind was racing and she felt tears starting to burn her eyes.
"Dean does love you... right?" Lizzy wondered.
But Y/N could not reply right away to her friend. She wiped the tears from her cheek that were now rolling down her face.
"Honestly, I... I don't know..."
After that relevation the other two girls came over and embraced Y/N into a big hug. But none of the three ladies saw the green eyed man that stood in the shadows, looking into the backyard and balling his fists, while he eavesdropped the whole conversation and tried to hold back his own tears.
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"You need to talk to him, Y/N."
"I know, Lizzy. I will."
"And if he doesn't understand it, then he is not the right guy for you."
The little goodbye scene kept playing over and over in Y/N's head. She had really awesome friends who tried to help and protect her and in the end, this little hide out was what she had needed. Because one thing became really clear to her and that was that she loved Dean. Her heart was his and she wanted at least fight for it.
But now, sitting in her car in the bunker's garage, nine hours later her nerves were starting to get to her. Maybe Dean was angry with her for leaving him so suddenly. Maybe he didn't wanted to talk to her anymore. Maybe, maybe, maybe...
She took a deep breath and stealed herself before she finally got out. With her bag over her right shoulder Y/N stepped into the war room, but the bunker layed erriely dark and quiet. Putting her bag down she went to look for Dean or Sam, but could not find any of the men right away. Which was weird, because she had told Dean that she would be back this evening. When she went down the hallway to the bedrooms she saw a light after turnig the corner to where the Dean Cave was.
Her heart started to race a little, but when she reached the door and opened it, she didn't know what to say or think. The room was enlightened by a lot of candles. The two armchairs were standing on a wall and a big pull out couch had took in their place. On a sidetable were some brugers, fries, drinks and an apple pie, ready to be eaten. What was happening?
By the sound of Dean clearing his throat Y/N was startled a little, but her eyes found him only seconds later. He was wearing dark Jeans, a black shirt and her favorite brown and grey checkered button down. He smiled, but also he seemed almost a little shy.
"What..." Y/N couldn't quite believe it and was touched at the same time.
"To much?" he asked with a wry grin.
"No! No, I... love it."and she really did, her heart was mealting on the spot. "But... why?"
Dean sighed. "Okay." he came over to her and took her hands in his.
But he did not really know how to start this conversation. In his mind he had time to think about it and in the end he had decided to just wing it, when the moment came. Only now this idea was probably not the best one he ever had.
"I'm so bad at this..." he grumbled to himself, but Y/N had still heared him. "I'm sorry... Y/N."
The woman furrowed her brows a little in confusion. "What?"
"I should've noticed something. I should've realized that... something was not right between us."
"Dean..."
"I know I've been really busy lately with my work. We didn't have a lot of time for us and... god, I should've at least noticed the signs during our sex...."
Now Y/N took a step back and looked at the man infront of her questioningly. "What do you mean?"
Dean's eyes widened. "Crap..." he uttered and scratched his head. "I, ehm... after you'd been gone for four days, I followed you to Jamestown to see you."
"You did?"
"I felt like I had to. You didn't answer my calls and I had the impression that you were pulling away from me. That I was about to lose you. So I wanted to talk to you one last time."
"But..." now she was really confused. "I did not see you. You weren't there..."
"I was... but I didn't get the chance to make myself known. You were sitting outside... with your friends..."
She needed a moment before she realized what he just had said. He was there and had heared everything she was explaning to Lizzy and Cathy. He knew it now. He knew what was going on in her.
"Oh god..." an uncomfortable feeling rose within her and she touched her forehand to collect her thoughts. "I wanted to talk to you, Dean. I really wanted to. But I just didn't know how and I didn't want to..."
"I love you." Dean cut her off. "Y/N... I love you."
His words started to sink in and tears began to build in her eyes.
"I should've told you that way sooner, but... like I said, I'm really not good at this. But that's not a good excuse either. And I don't wanna lose you over something that we can fix without any problems."
He touched her cheek and tried to catch the now falling tears with his thump.
"You are so important to me... and I hope you will never feel like you can't talk to me again.
And to prove his point, he kissed her. A little cautious at first, but Y/N gave in right away and so he could deepen the kiss. It felt so good, she had really missed that, but she was still a little nervous. She layed her arms around his neck and buried her hands in his hair. Dean embraced her into a tight hug and moved from her lips to her neck. She moaned softly and goosebumps rose all over her body.
His hands slowly made their way down to her hips and landed on her bottom. He gentle squeezed and massaged her ass, while she rubbed herself on him. It felt like they were back at the beginning months ago, when they started dating. The lingering touches, the soft moans. As if they had all the time in the world.
Their clothes fell slowly piece by piece to the floor and after Dean brought Y/N down on the couch, the underwear was all that was left. But Dean kept holding her tightly in his arms, kissed her slowly but very passionately. Legs and arms intertwined it felt like they were trying to become one, not just physically but with their minds, too. Like Dean tried to connect their souls with eachother.
When the rest of the fabric fell, Dean kept eye contact while he entered her with slow and deep strokes. He moved with passion and desire as he put his hand under her hip to change the angle, to be even deeper connected to his girl.
"I love you." he said again, after he picked up some speed.
"I love you, too." Y/N answered as she came closer and closer to her climax.
And while they both came undone, her heart was bursting with love for this man, who loved her back just as much.
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A/N: I don't know why, but I really loved this. 🥰 I hope you liked it too. And to anyone who came across this, let me know what you think. I'd appreciate it. 😊
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@lyarr24 @leigh70 @k-slla
245 notes · View notes
wishlistcharles · 1 day
Text
secrets we keep (pt1) → mv1
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max verstappen x perez!fem reader
genre: one night stand, teammates sister, pregnancy
cw: 18+ MDNI, smut, oral (male receiving), p in v, slight spit play, dirty talk, mentions of pregnancy, pls let me know if i am forgetting anything
word count: 3.1k
song: too sweet - hozier
sidenote: hi everyone! finally a new fic is here and it's a max one! this is going to be a two parter, so keep an eye out for the next one! please let me know if y'all have any ideas or requests for a fic (I write for all drivers), also not beta read. hope you all enjoy <3
♡♡♡♡
The roars of the crowd were loud as Max crossed the finish line, followed closely by Sergio. For a second there you had thought your brother would overtake the world champion, but nonetheless he fought hard and gave the team what they wanted, a 1-2 finish. 
It wasn’t often you got to go to your brother's races, maybe only a handful a year but you were lucky to be able to get the time off to join your niece and nephews for the Japanese Grand Prix. Sergio would topple over if he knew you had the hots for his teammate. Every time you have met with Max, it’s been very cordial. Polite hellos, asking how life in Mexico is, what you have been up to since he last saw you. 
A part of you wondered why he was so timid with you. Was it because of Sergio? Being the baby of the family left him feeling protective of you, but you don’t think that would affect how Max interacted with you. I mean you barely saw him. 
Watching the pair on the podium set tears in your eyes. You were extremely proud of your big brother and his teammate. 
Your dad absolutely adored max and had invited him to join us for a celebratory dinner after the race. Which to your surprise he happily accepted. 
You were staying at the same hotel that both the bulls were at, so reconnecting for dinner would not be difficult. After the race you decided to head back to freshen up and change your clothes into something a little more fancy. At the race you were wearing a white tennis skirt with a red bull polo tucked in. For dinner you decided to wear a  black  over the shoulder dress that fit you perfectly. Finally ready you walk down and see that only Max is waiting in the lobby. Your stomach turns at the thought of being alone with him.
Picking his head up from looking down at his phone he notices you walking toward him and waves shyly. “Hi y/n, looks like it’s only us ready” he said in a tiny voice. You are always so used to him being outspoken it kinda scares you a little. “hi maxie, you know how my family is with time management, they should be down here soon” you said with a laugh, not even acknowledging the nickname that slipped from your mouth. 
A sudden tinge of pink washes over Max’s cheeks and you feel heat radiating up your neck. Act cool, you keep telling yourself but you are so nervous. Max was all you ever wanted in a guy. Handsome, sweet, confident, the list could go on. You knew deep down though your worlds would never clash well. You lived in Mexico with your parents - working as a teacher. Max lived in Monaco and raced for one of the best teams in formula one history, surrounded by models throwing themselves at him. You couldn’t blame them, you would do the same, if you thought you ever had a chance. 
“No worries, I always have to wait for Checo to come to our team meetings” he laughed. “I bet, if there’s one thing my brother isn’t know for it’s being on time, thank you for coming to dinner with us though, we really appreciate it, I know my dad and brother do a lot”
With a smirk on his face something shifts “oh just your dad and brother, not you?”. You feel the breath knocked out of your lungs, just as you are about to open your mouth to respond, tiny roars make notice in the room and you almost fall at your nephew running to you, so you could pick him up. Silently you thank your nephew for the interruption. 
Dinner goes smoothly. You sat at the opposite end of the table with the kids, while your brother, dad, and max were deep in conversation. You swore that Max kept looking at you though, sneaking glances. 
As the check gets situated, all of you make your way out onto the busy streets of Japan. You hear your brother speak up “Y/N are you gonna come get ice cream with us” and while you were deeply contemplating it, you decided to pass up the offer and head back to the hotel. 
“No I think I'm gonna head back to the hotel and pack, I want to take the kids to get breakfast tomorrow morning before we leave” you say.
“no puedes caminar solo es tarde en la noche” (you can't walk alone, it's late at night) your brother worries. 
“Sergio, I'm fine, it's not that far from the hotel, I'll grab a taxi” before he could protest, Max jumped in.
“I can take a taxi back with y/n, I'm super tired after the race, and I'll make sure she makes it to her hotel room” 
“Are you sure Max?” Sergio asks.
“Yes I'm sure, it was a lovely evening, thank you for inviting me” 
Your family bids their farewells and walks away, leaving just the two of you waiting for a taxi. As you guys are picked up, you both don't say a word in the car, sitting in an uncomfortable silence. Max pays the driver and you thank him quietly. Making your way up to the floor where both of your rooms are, you stop at his first. “Thank you for bringing me back Max, I appreciate it” 
“Of course it's no problem, hey I'm actually not really that tired, do you wanna play Fifa or watch a movie?” he asks. Something deep down is telling you to decline. Spending time with him is just going to dig you deeper in a hole with how you feel about him, nonetheless, you can't let this opportunity go and accept this offer. 
Walking in you notice the room is ten times bigger than yours, with a balcony and jacuzzi tub in the middle of the bathroom. Max must notice your awe because he says “I don't know why they give us such big rooms, we are hardly ever even in here”
“Haha it's nice for Checo because the kids get to play around” 
“You are really close with them, aren't you?”
“They are practically my own, when their mom is out doing business I usually keep them, I also help homeschool them” 
“Well that's very sweet of you” he says while taking a seat on the bed, while motioning you to do the same.
“Do you want something to drink” he offers
“No I'm okay” you politely decline. You still can't believe this, you are in Max Verstappen's room all alone. 
“Okay let's put on a movie! What are you up for, should we do action” you sense a sudden shift in his mood, you can't quite place it, maybe excitement. You believe he can probably sense that you are nervous. The mention of action makes your ears perk up.“Can we please watch fast and the furious, I am on a mission to have all my friends watch it”
Max doesn't protest, just laughs quietly and nods, setting the movie in place. You make yourself comfortable and take off your big hoop earrings and heels- even though they werent big by any means they still hurt you. Once you are back in bed with him, you notice him looking at you.
“Is there something on my face?” You laugh
“No i just guess I never noticed how different but similar you look from checo”
“Really? How so?” You question
“Well for one, you are very pretty, but you have the same freckles that Checo does covering your cheeks and nose” Max’s comment has you feeling shy, you know you must be sporting a prominent blush across your face and neck. 
“well thank you Max, it's funny because growing up, i never had freckles, but i think being out in the sun for races and the kids karting tournaments have really brought them to surface” 
“That's interesting, I admire how close to your family you are, something I wish I had” he says so quietly you almost miss it. You don't know what possesses you to do this but you place your hand over his and say “you are always welcome in this family max, we all love you, and no matter where sergio goes next year- you will always be welcomed with open arms” 
He stares at you with a blank face- unable to tell what he's thinking you begin to think that was the wrong thing to say when suddenly he leans down a plants a gentle kiss over your lips. You gasp at the touch. Max pulls back with wide eyes and says “shit I shouldn't have done that, Checo will kill me if he found out”. Instead of agreeing with him, you keep your hand held tightly over his and whisper “he doesn't have to know”. That's all it seems to take for max to lean back in and start kissing you. 
You grab the front of his shirt, gripping the fabric in your hands. His palm cups your jaw, slowly deepening the kiss. Once his tongue makes his way in, you let out a quiet moan. 
Grabbing your hips, Max shifts your position so that you are laying on the bed while he towers over you. “You are so pretty y/n, been wanting to do this forever” he says while tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. While you want to pour your heart out, your nerves stop you and all you can do is nod and say “want you so bad max”. 
He continues to kiss you, tracing his mouth up and down your neck and along the junction between your shoulder and neck placing feather-like kisses. There’s nothing more that you want then for him to leave a big bruise plastered for everyone to see but you knew that wasn’t possible. 
You grab his head and place your lips back on his. Moving his hand to your hair he grips it tightly, keeping you in his control. Slowly he rocks his hips down to meet yours, creating a union of moans to spill from the both of you. This must be the breaking point for max because he stops to take off his shirt and grabs your dress to do the same. Not before asking “is this okay”. 
“Of course it’s okay, I want all of you” you whisper out. His pants also come off in the process. Both of you left in your underwear. You could feel yourself soaked through your panties. Max moves his hand so that his thumb is slowly running along your slit through the fabric. A moan is pushed out of you with a quiet plea of more. 
Growing impatient you tug the straps of your bra down your shoulders exposing your breasts to him. This catches his attention because Max is on them immediately. Sucking and kissing them, basically worshiping them. “Fuck, these tits are perfect. They were practically popping out of your dress earlier, wanted to take you to the bathroom at the restaurant and just suck on them for hours” 
You would have never guessed Max to be into dirty talk but it’s a pleasant surprise. “I want you in me Max, please, I’ve been waiting for this” 
“How can I deny such a pretty girl? '' With that being said, Max gets up and walks to his bag to pull out what seems to be a condom. While he’s doing that, you shimmy your underwear down your legs and throw it somewhere in the room. Before he approaches the bed, Max takes his underwear off and you see his cock spring free. Your mouth instantly waters at the sight. He’s big, just like you thought he would be. Pale and veiny. Pink and wet at the tip.
You wanted him in you but not before you got a taste of him. You motion him up towards your mouth, so that his legs are on both sides of your shoulders. “I want to taste you, can I Max?” You said hoping your voice and eyes truly show the desire you have burning for him. 
“Go ahead sweetie, suck me off”
That’s all you needed to hear before taking the tip in your mouth, lightly sucking. Max groans at the sensation and places a hand behind your head for support. Popping yourself off the tip, you lick a long strip under his shaft, following the prominent vein that lies there. You place feather-like kisses on the head hoping to tease him. As you look up at him, you see his mouth slightly agape, eyes stuck on you. “Don't tease me baby, c'mon”.
You start to bob your head, up and down, making sure you move your tongue back and forth. You palm at his balls and hear a hiss, thinking he must be sensitive. 
“Fuck, you suck me off so good, this mouth was made for me, wasn't it y/n” 
You whimper at the words and try to push yourself further down his cock. Grabbing your head, he pulls you off and says “I need to get in you”. 
You nod your head fast and practically beg “please Max, please want you in me”.
As he positioned himself between your legs, he's looking directly at your core, you start to feel a bit insecure and try to close your legs, but he uses both his to keep them open. “You have such a pretty pussy, want to absolutely devour it” what he does next has you almost combust. He hovers his mouth over your core and lets a string of spit come done to coat you. Taking his index and middle finger he holds you open and lets another drop of spit fall on you. You are moaning so loud, you place your hand over your mouth to try and keep yourself quiet. 
Max places two fingers in you while simultaneously rubbing slow circles over your clit. You are desperate for him to get in you. “Max I'm good, you can get in me”.
That's all he needs to hear before he puts his condom on and sinks into you. The burn is unlike anything you have felt before. You were definitely not used to his size but the stretch was addicting. As he builds up pace, you place your hands over his back, your fingernails gripping onto his shoulders, it feels so so good. “Faster” you whisper. Max listens. You could already feel the coil in your stomach about to snap, what pushes you over the edge is Max’s dirty talk. “You wrap around me so good, best pussy I've ever had, what would people think if they saw my roommate's sister coming all over my cock” you can't respond, all you can do is moan.
Finally catching your breath you say “you feel so good Max, you are gonna make me cum” and you tuck your head into his neck licking a fat stripe near his Adams apple. “I'm gonna come too, come with me y/n”.
The next couple of minutes go by in a blur, you feel yourself clenching on his cock, cumming while he pumps in and out of you with his hand rubbing at your clit. He kisses you hard as he groans into your mouth. “Fuck that was good” he states and all you can do is nod. 
Max takes off his condom, and goes to the bathroom, returning in his underwear, with a warm washcloth. You feel embarrassed but you let him clean you up. You are left undressed so you ask if he could hand you your dress. The room is filled with an awkward tension. Max can tell because he lays down on the bed and pats it for you to lay with him. 
You feel like you should decline and be on your way, not wanting to overstay your welcome. But you genuinely don't think this will ever happen again and want to cherish what little time you have in the same proximity.  You lay with your head on his chest and his arm thrown over you with the tv playing in the background. Time passes quickly and within 30 minutes you hear soft snores coming out of max. You take this as your cue to leave. You slip yourself away and gather your belongings. Taking one last glance at him you smile and quietly make your way out of the room. 
You don't have a lot of time to reflect once you get back to your room because you have to shower, and pack for your flight in the morning. You don't know if you and Max will ever reconnect like that, but you are grateful for the time you shared. 
You don't see or hear from Max before you leave Japan, but maybe it's for the best. Your brother didn't expect anything and you are determined to keep it that way. 
The first couple of weeks back in Mexico were rough, slowly recovering from your trip. Around 6 weeks after being home and two more grand prix taking place, you feel sick, like a stomach bug has really knocked you down. It was so bad that you weren't able to go to the Miami gp like you wanted. 
Deciding it has been lingering for far too long you decide to go to the doctor. The first thing they ask you is if it's possible if you are pregnant. Your first thought is no, but you remember you and Max had hooked up around two months ago. You feel a pit in your stomach and your heart rate speeds up. You couldn't be right, he wore a condom, and you hadn't had sex for like a year prior to that. 
After you take your pee test, you have never been more scared or felt more alone. You want your mom here. After what felt like an eternity, the doctor came in with a smile and sat down. “Congratulations y/n you are pregnant”. The world came to a stand still and all you can do is cry. 
Because how in the hell are you going to tell your brother you are pregnant with his teammate's baby. How are you going to tell Max that you are pregnant? 
Simple. You won't. 
364 notes · View notes
yorsgirl · 17 hours
Note
Yan!Heian!Sukuna and with Y/N?
Lately, whenever Darling got pregnant she ended up having countless miscarriages, the longest lasting at least 3 months, Sukuna began to suspect these countless coincidences.
He doesn't care about these losses since he didn't want to share Y/N with some brat, but he found it very strange that every time she got pregnant resulted in a miscarriage, so he started investigating and finally found out why this was happening.
He discovered that Y/N was causing her own miscarriages, as she knew that the last thing the world needed was Sukuna's descendants, so he finally confronts her but with that damn psychological terror that he loves to do to her.
Oh my, I love love love this idea!!
I kinda went out on this one, but I hope I did justice to what you were aiming at. Hope you like it :) Also I am sorry for being so late
Playing God
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Yandere!Ryomen Sukuna x Fem!Reader
Synopsis: It was a gamble, he was willing to make. To keep you with him, forever, as he wanted. Needed. You had to realize that no other heaven except his arms would be comforting. Even if that meant, breaking your very soul.
Tropes: Dark Romance, Historical fiction, Angst
Warnings: Implied nsfw(forced), mentions of pregnancy, miscarriage, abduction, cannibalism and isolation. Trauma, mild stockholm syndrome, yandere themes, minor character death(s), gore, gaslighting, manipulation, misogyny, blood, degradation(non-kinky), patriarchal society, unhealthy relationship, implied child birth.
General warnings: Yandere!True form!Husband!Sukuna, Wife!Reader, Heian Era, both Sukuna and reader are a red flag on their own, usage of nicknames, no mentions of y/n, not proofread.
Word Count: 9.7k ( Just when I thought AFW2 was long, I write this... I know its too much but trust me, I needed to. There was just so many things which I couldn't miss out.)
A/N: This is the first request which I worked on, so idk if I did it up to your standard. I sincerely apologize, if this isn't what you wanted. + I hope its similar to what you wanted. Thanks for the wait and request.
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You were digging your own grave.
So you shouldn't have been surprised that your wish would be granted. Yet, if you could have one wish then you'd wish for freedom but no- freedom was a forfeited dream, far beyond your reach. Consideration of that one would never be fruitful. You are trapped even in your dreams.
Playing with fire only gets you burnt.
For long, you played this game and this- this was your compensation. For everything you had done until now, all you are returned with was abandonment. Not that supposedly, betrayal, yes. More appropriate.
Flames surrounded you, crawling up your skin, the screams piercing your ears, your chest heaved up and down. Gaze, once settled on your hearth, now all you saw was the burning hut, the crackling of embers reached your ears. Attire and hands stained with blood of the insolent. The warning shouldn't have been taken lightly. Should have known, the extent of his power.
Eyes held terror, fright, regret- whatever you could name. The multitude of names you received seemed no more than a distant dream, nowhere to be found. All were running away - expectable.
You expected calamity, but you were calm.
Everything went down in flames. Save for you, you weren't burning. Not an spark touched your skin. Was it the distance or the control? Who knows. But one confirmation which you held was that - tonight you won't die. Not so soon either.
Careful, not all Gods are worshipped.
The words rang in your ears and as if on cue, you found him again. In this reverie of madness, he held your sight when you attempted to turn - The eyes tinted with crimson.
.
"I am sorry for your loss, m'lady."
You had seen it all.
You had your fair share of encounters, received news and such. Women losing their mind and sanity after delivered with a news this devastating. Notably, no woman would feel any bliss after knowing that they had lost their child. Lost the chance of motherhood before experiencing it. Violent outbursts was the most probable outcome.
"This is a hard time," The midwife spoke softly. "Yet, you shouldn't neglect your health."
You perceived the softness to be fear. She must have had dealt with situations like these, most of them traumatizing, you assumed. Perhaps, she expected the same from you too. You tore your gaze off her, leaning back on your bedframe, "I'd like to be left alone."
Your declaration was answered with compliance. Offering a humble bow, she bid you farewell, walking out of your chambers. Once her footsteps seized, you finally let your guard down. Breathing out a sigh of relief, you laid back down on your bed.
"Good riddance," You muttered to yourself. Moments of such vulnerability wasn't rare – considering you were served with loneliness, lately. Save for the times you spent in the presence of Sukuna. His decree, one might say. Your attention shouldn't be wasted on anyone but him.You scoffed recalling his words. Involuntarily, your hand stroked your belly, the corner of your lip curled up.
Once a house to life, given by your husband; now lay vacant from your doing.
A twisted sense of pride swelled up in your chest, a wide grin stretching on your face. You were successful in your quest, again. Mercilessly, you uprooted the seed of your Husband's lineage. Perhaps, you've truly gone sick.
Yet, this revolt of feelings were miles lesser than the repugnant you encountered when you realized your first pregnancy. You were on the brink of clawing out the creature growing in your womb. You'd have torn it apart with while revelling in the joy of watching its blood drip down on the face of Earth. If not for Sukuna's presence in the room, you might've gone through it.
You lost a fragment of yourself, that day.
Throwing up countless times, dizziness, nausea, even losing your consciousness while walking down - no, they weren't pregnancy side effects. More so, the outcome of the stress accumulating in you.
Sickening. His kin you'd have cradled in your body. To have born and grow up into a revolting, merciless creature like his father. To take up place in your womb, your flesh and blood combined with his, a living proof of your plight - disgusting.
Never. You'd never let that happen.
You'd never succumb to such monstrosity.
You had already given up your freedom, your dignity, your alight life to Sukuna in exchange of the lives you held dear. The lives back in your ancestral village, home to your kin.
You were affirmed, an heir of Ryomen Sukuna would never be birthed from you.
Speak of the devil, he appears.
An overwhelming familiar aura surrounded your very being, the doors to your chamber slid open, your captor, your husband strolled inside. Even his mere presence held the malevolence in him. You attempted to rise from your position at his arrival.
"Sit." He commanded.
You silently obeyed his order, keeping your gaze settled on your lap, the energy had your stomach churning with trepidation; at times when you didn't do anything either. And this time, you were guilty. Two moments passed in silence until he spoke.
"I heard from the midwife."
You took in a sharp breath, swallowing a lump in your throat. It was the same ordeal, like the first two times. Yet, you were a tad bit calm since the previous encounters. Probably, due to the fact you were getting used to this role. In this past moons, you had developed into the wife, he was carving you out to be. Giving him just the reactions he wanted, for that saved you a lot of anguish and pain. Even if it came at the price of your self-respect. This was the only way.
With your head hung low, you spoke, "Forgive me, my lord. I am incapable of bearing you an heir. I-It must have been my fau-"
"Not another word."
You instantly stiffened up, his deep voice causing chills to run down your spine. Did you make an error? Was he aware of your tumultuous acts? Was the play not convincing enough?
He held your chin, forcing you to look up at him. All of his four, red eyes bore into you. You bit on your inner cheek, blood coursing in your veins - steadfast.
They say, your fear start to vanish once you've remained in the source of their vicinity too long. That statement is false. For even after staying with your captor for almost two years, you still held your fear.
"The one at fault bore consequences."
That's when you were hit with the faint stench of blood from him. Another one perished. You took the wild guess of it being the midwife. However, instead of amplifying fright, it was lessened. You wouldn't be on the receiving end of his wrath.
"You aren't at fault, wife."
Oh, but you were.
Sukuna held your gaze, cupping your cheek; the rough pad of his thumb trailed a line on your skin. His tone and grip were surprisingly gentle. "There's no need to apologize."
The corners of your eyes crinkled down, you lean into his touch. You assume, it's a good move as you noted the flicker of emotion in his eyes. "It's the third time, my lord. Perhaps, I bear some shortcomings."
"What nonsense," He rolled his eyes. "There's none, not in my eyes. Don't fill your head with such fickle thoughts." He paused for a moment before continuing, "Is that understood?"
He wasn't one for affirmations but maybe- just maybe it was his attempt at comfort, you supposed. The previous losses must had him learning, the threads of condolence. Still, for you, they'd never mean anything less than empty words. The last thing you wanted was to be comforted by your tormentor. You'd rather step into hell willingly.
But you were living under his wing. You have to play according to his whims. You nodded. "Yes, my lord."
His hand left your face, dropping to his thigh. He looked at you, as if sizing you up. You had to keep yourself from making any unnecessary movements. Sukuna wanted you composed, whatever the situation. (Except the times when he bedded you, you were allowed to scream, cry and thrash around then. Cause you were trapped under his immense strength, struggles were futile).
After a while, he asked, "Any wishes?"
You chewed on your bottom lip, eyes flickering down then back to him. You let out a breath, before continuing. "May I visit the shrine... this evening?"
Silence.
You were contemplating whether you had offended him, somehow. Previously, he did allow for your little trips, you wondered if his patience was running thin cause of your repeated incapability of bearing him an heir. Maybe, you ran out of luck.
You were about to mutter an apology but then a smug grin spread across his lips, "Why so?" He asked.
"To-" You swallowed a lump, preparing to answer the practiced dialogue. "To offer prayers for–"
"Why grieve for someone who didn't even take form?" He cut you up, raising an eyebrow. For a tad moment, he sounded curious. It broke into a cruel chuckle, "You humans would make a funeral out of anything, yes?"
If you held an ounce of sympathy then you wouldn't question.
You wanted to say but you knew better. Besides, you still have to keep up the act of being his loyal wife. Heaving a out a deep breath, you replied, "I suppose." You paused, running the tip of your tongue over your lip.
"I'd pray that I can bear you an heir the next time, my lord."
Nay, more so: I'd pray that you receive your end soon, my lord.
Sukuna watched you. No, not look. He watched, like a predator. Then, his lips cracked into a sinister grin. "You've a way with your words, wife."
It caught you off guard. You raised an eyebrow, attempting to voice out your confusion. "What do-"
"I will accompany you."
.
"Sukuna sama, the herbalist you asked for, has arrived."
Sukuna spared a glance at Uraume, who knelt by his feet.
"Bring him."
As on cue, they rose up from their stance, pivoting around towards the door. It parted, two curses had a man in their grasp as he struggled to break free. His eyes widening with terror when it fell on the King, sitting atop his throne.
The man was pushed down to his knees, face meeting the floor in a loud slam. His scuffles were in vain against such power, he knew that. Still, in a situation of life and death, rationality takes it's leave.
Sukuna clicked his tongue in annoyance. All he wanted was some herbalist to answer the flurry of questions in his which had him restless for the past few days. Did this scum think he'd be killed? Maybe he would be, if he deems it necessary or he proves to be useless.
What had him restless was your miscarriages. Counting the most recent would make it a fourth. Where did he go wrong? You were kept in utmost luxury, no toils whatsoever. Still, what was wrong?
—》《—
"Perhaps, there's some faults in her highness."
"Keep your voice down, Mira. Someone may hear you."
"I am a lot quite... but tell me, don't you find it strange? How come she has lost all of her children?"
"I- I suppose. Perhaps, motherhood is not written in her fate."
"Or so, she's simply incapable."
—》《—
Safe to say, those were the last words they uttered before they were turned into a mash of flesh and blood.
Sliced into pieces that even trying to make a proper corpse out of the remnants weren't possible.
At times, Sukuna wished he held the power to bring back someone to life. Then maybe, he'd have given those servants a death, more worthy. Maybe, ripping out their limbs, piece by piece. First the bones would break, ripped from the ligaments, then it'd be the muscles; that was easy to just tear out. And after that happened, he could have just sewn up the blobs of flesh again and repeat the process until they learn their lesson or the life leaves them again.
He deduced the latter would be more probable. Still, it would be fine. They deserved that.
Speaking ill of you in his palace, in his vicinity, in his world was prohibited. A sin, in the words of humans. And a sin never goes unpunished.
You - his consort, his queen, you were heavenly. There isn't a fault in you, it's some external factor, must be. But he can't let go of his growing suspicion either.
Sukuna detested children, it was a known fact. Always ending their lives first, whenever he set foot in a village. They were of no use to him, unless they were served to him on his platter. He couldn't deny, their flesh was flavourful.
Even though, he held great disdain for them, he couldn't help but desire a kinship with you. With the price of letting go of your undivided attention? Hmm, doesn't sound too great. He assumed, he can hire a wet nurse, just in case. Still, he desired to see you round with his child, feet swollen as you struggled to walk around. You do not have to worry, he, your husband would joyfully oblige in carrying you in his arms. You were more than perfect, he couldn't even imagine just how beautiful you'll look, during and after carrying your child.
It was destined. You'd extend his lineage or no one else.
You were flawless then why were you causing such errors? Contradicting. It was his question until he started to take a note in your behaviour, and he found...
Sukuna stood up from his throne, walking down the steps of bones, presumably of the ones he killed. They act as a pretty show piece, according to him.
The court resonated with his footsteps, each one carrying a promise of death. The man's struggles seized once he was harshly pulled up by his hair, his eyes met with Sukuna's.
"Yo-your high–ness," The man fumbled with his words, a spine chilling sensation going down his frame.
"Time's wasting," Sukuna said, his glare pointed. The fury evident, though his exterior was calm. "Comply if you don't wish death."
The man nodded frequently, his fingertips trembled with anticipation and horror. "Ye-yes, your highness. It's an honour to s-serve you." The man fell to his feet as he was dropped. Sukuna dismissed the extra company with a wave of his hand.
"Rise," He declared.
The man still on his knees, raises his head. "What can I- I do for you, your highness?"
—》《—
"May I make a request, my lord?"
Sukuna's eyes flickered to you, yours not meetinh his. Knelt before him, you gracefully poured the sake in his ochoko.
"Speak."
He marked the squinting in your irises, fingertips trembled when you put the vessel down. Your shoulders rose and fell before you gazed at him, reluctantly. He couldn't help but find your antics inhumanely amusing. 
"Would you be kind enough... to bring me this-" You paused for a fleeting moment. "This herb called... aloe vera?"
—》《—
"Aloe vera," Sukuna tilted his head aside, the upper pair of arms crossed over his chest. "What use does it have?"
"We-well, my lord it's used for heal-healing purposes, burns, cuts, rashes... it heals injuries, yes." He answered, taking a gulp. There was other uses too yet his head was alike a blank canvas, before such a formidable strength. He wasn't even aware if it was satisfactory or why the King of Curses needed to know about such a measly plant. But if it meant, he gets to live another day, then he'll just give what he could offer. "I-It can also be used to– to make me-medicated food. N-not a delicacy... I might add."
Sukuna raised an eyebrow, "That's it?"
"N-no, my lord. There- it can cure diges-"
"In pregnancy."
The man stiffened, his mouth parting a tad bit. A whisper leaving his lips, "Yo-your highness...?"
Pregnancy, menstruation, considered taboo. A matter regarding women, spoken in the inner chambers, the men should remain ignorant. A topic whispered in ears not spoken aloud in any hall, let alone the royal court. Certainly, Sukuna was aware of this societal construct, yet he didn't care. The society and its idiotic rules could go to hell. He just needed answers.
"Speak," Sukuna's voice was louder, deeper when the man before him fidgeted in his spot due to discomfort - on speaking such a topic.
"It-Its a- your highness, I d-don't think you-"
"Bastard," His fumbling was interrupted by Sukuna. The warning evident in his profanity. His face grew darker, the four irises glowing with impending danger akin Satan himself. "If you so much as want to live, fucking speak."
The man's blood ran cold as on cue, face turning a shade paler as if winter had started to pool in. Tears prickled the corners of his eyes, "Forgive me, your highness! I will speak, I will- yes- aloe vera its-" He heaved out a deep breath, an attempt to slow down his beating heart. "Any fo-form of it is ill-suited during pregnancy... it can cause... cause pe-pelvic haemorrhage leading to... to  misc-"
"Miscarriage?"
"Yes, miscarriage... can lead to miscarriage, your highness."
A profound silence prevailed. Not a soul spoke neither was a footstep heard. Not a leaf rustled or the howling winds tapped on the window pane - assumed, mother nature had halted its elements from making any noise.
The stakes were high yet an flicker of courage alighted in the man as he raised his head up to glance at Sukuna, "My lor-"
The man's head tumbled down before he could even complete.
He couldn't scream, he couldn't beg, he couldn't apologize, he couldn't even blink. All he could do was watch. Watch as his beheaded body fell limp before his eyes. Watch as the blood poured out like waterfalls staining the carpet with its hues. The red marred bones protruded out amidst the flesh, globs of blood was gushing out of his severed voice box. His body jerked, the remnants of conscious nerves trying to survive.
It was a neat cut. A heavenly sight.
The world started to blur in. And before he knew it, the light was gone from his eyes.
Sukuna didn't even spare a glance as he marched out of his court.
Uraume approached the body, a few maids accompanying them. They casted a disapproving glare at the corpse.
"Not edible, dispose of it."
.
You didn't see or hear from Sukuna for a week.
He didn't visit your chambers at night neither was he present when you sat down for your meals. Even his energy was alike a hushed whisper which would remind you of his presence in the residence, but not reveal himself to you. For some reason, it had you in an unease.
No, you certainly did not miss his presence. But his absence just made the surroundings almost suffocating. There was the looming threat that something had happened or something were to happen. One worse than the other.
Silence was never uneventful.
Taking up the courage, you had once inquired Uraume about his absence. Presenting a polite bow, they answered, "Sukuna sama doesn't want to be disturbed."
Disturbed... as if he wasn't the cause of all disturbances. A natural disaster in himself. You resisted the urge to scoff and uttered a meek line of gratitude before going about your day. (Which extended with you strolling down the halls or garden or just be in your chambers and read the few books, Sukuna had bought you)
On the very same day the dark commenced. While you were mesmerized by the fall of twilight over the garden, you heard his voice.
"Don't you love playing with poison, wife?"
The sudden question made you halt your steps, you weren't even aware that he was present- shielded his aura, presumably. You turned around, raising an eyebrow with bewilderment.
"Pardon, my lord?"
Sukuna snorted , walking up to you, a smirk played on his lips. You had to make the effort of tilting your head to gaze up at him. His towering figure loomed over you, his lower left hand snaking around your waist - pulling you closer to him.
"You love poisons, don't you? Or in your words - herbs."
Your shoulders grew rigid, eyes widening with realization, a sharp breath hitting your throat. Your fingertips trembled with anticipation. You were sure to be discreet in your affairs, using the isolation he subjected you to at its best. He knew. It was bad. Very much so. And what were to happen now? What would he do to you?
Another night of horror where your screams would be unheard, your resistance proved to be futile, where you'd be left to suffer alone, where another shard of your remaining soul would be plunged by him. Another night where you'd again play into his whims... Or something more vile, leaving you physically disabled? Perhaps, even death...
The foremost was the most heinous one. You silently prayed that he wouldn't resort to that. If you were to be subjected to his torment then you wished he'd just kill you, liberating you for once and for all. Even so, survival is what the mind wants. Piecing through any tactic just to live another day. The play for now should be denial.
Sukuna's affections for you worked as a double edged sword. You aimed to take advantage of it, in every way possible. You instilled a bit of courage, standing your ground, you spoke "I don't understand what you're trying to instigate, my lord."
He looked down on you, a coy smile uplifting his lips. He threaded his fingers through the knot of your kimono, leaning down next to your ear, he inhaled your scent. His lips brushing over your neck.
"I do not believe so, wife." He murmured, his warm breath hitting your skin, a range of goosebumps rising over your arm. "In fact, I think you clearly know, what I speak about."
Before you could let a word out, he straightened up, turning around, he pushed you to walk with him. His large hand still covering your back.
"Come, let me entertain you."
.
You were walking to the gallows.
Not literally but you were sure, your end was near.
The wooden floors creaked with footfalls. Each step heavier than the previous. You hesitantly glimpsed at Sukuna, his gaze was far ahead. Not a word left his mouth in this while. Only his hold remained firm. He pushed you forward every moment your step faltered.
Your breath hitched when you turned a corner - the right wing. A rule, you could say. Sukuna made it clear since the day he held you captive brought you home - never step a foot in the right wing. Despair drowned your curiosity that time, you didn't question, least bothered to. Even later, you didn't dare to defy him; courtesy to the pain you were subjected to once.
Still, you could make the wild guess of what happened in there. The muffled screams kept you awake at midnight, it was easy to put the puzzle pieces together. There he revelled with the sick pleasure of tormenting your kind.
He stopped before a pair of oak doors. That's when he glanced at you, for the first time in a long while. For a moment, he stared at you with an emotion you couldn't decipher. The next moment, he pulled out the Kanzashi from your hair, letting your strands tousle down.
You flinched, pushing away the curls which clouded your vision. Sukuna held the pin in his hand, holding your gaze. He was unmoving.
What happened to him?
"My lord," You called. "What are you-"
"Stay quiet," He handed you the kanzashi back, adjusting your hand to hold it as if it were a dagger. Turning to the door, he spared you a glance. "Don't speak a word." With that, the doors opened.
Dark.
It was dark save for the light of the lantern which illuminated the room. He shoved you forward, the door locking behind as he stood aside you.
"One bite."
Huh? Bite? What did he mean? You slightly turned your head towards him but you were stopped in your tracks. It wasn't only you and Sukuna in this room, seems you had a guest. More appropriate word? A Captive.
Your eyes were wide open. On the corner of the room, sat a young boy, not more than a adolescent - blindfolded. Restrained by chains, his wrists and ankles were cuffed with metal. A small whimper left his lips as he registered the presence of both of you.
You were about to speak but then his words rang in your mind.
Don't speak a word.
Sukuna gripped your wrist, leading you to the boy, "One bite, in the arm."
He wasn't talking to you. To the boy, he kept his eyes. You marked how the boy flinched. The metals clanking on contact.
He turned to you then, motioning to the pin in your hand then the boy's arm. Realization hit you. You tried to shake your head, refuse; but one glare of his and you were compelled. Reluctantly, you turned around, trudging to the boy.
Something was wrong.
You could feel it. Why... why would he want you to stab this poor boy? A picture of misery, he was. You noted he didn't have any sign of bruises in his body - peculiar. Yet, his fragile state was enough to give you a hint that he had been here for days. Perhaps, starved too. The tension was high and all you wanted was to leave this room, in an instant.
Fine, if Sukuna wanted you to just stab the boy. You'd do it. Missing the vital points which could end his life. One, he said. You'll miss the point and done. Its not upon you that you'd pierce the wrong place. His instructions weren't specific - that'd be your excuse.
He won't die. Not from your hands.
You gently held the boy's arm, angling the pointers on the muscles. You drove it in.
Miscalculation.
The boy's body instantly stiffened, an gut wrenching scream erupted from his mouth. He thrashed around, swinging his legs and arms, his body twitching violently.
You recoiled back soon, yanking out the pin, stepping away on instinct. You watched with terror.
Foam rose up the boy's mouth, his shrieks pierced your eardrums. The fluid dripped down his jaw, marring his clothes. He clutched the area where you stabbed him. Scratching at it with all his might. The sound of flesh ripping filled your ears as the boy ruthlessly, tore the muscles.
You were stunted. You couldn't speak or move. You weren't chained but you felt as if a thousand shackles bore you down.
The next seconds were a blur. The screams started to die down, his body losing it's color. Sooner than you could grasp, did the room turn silent again.
The boy was dead.
.
"Enjoyed the show, wife?"
You slapped your hand over your mouth, stumbling a few steps back. You couldn't tear your eyes off the young boy, bile rose up your throat as the room started to spin.
"Wh-what did you-"
No- you couldn't throw up, whatever second thought it was, it refrained you from crumbling to your knees and make a mess. Shivers went down your spine, you struggled to stand straight. The stench of the corpse and the expunging liquids started to fill your nostrils. You were almost on the verge to lose consciousness.
"What... did you do?"
Your eyes flickered to Sukuna. He stood tall, not a sign of emotion on his mien. You regret ever considering mirth to the worst feature on him, cause none was more terrifying.
And he was watching you.
It reminded you of the time, you first saw him -  covered with blood of the lives he had taken, down the river bank. Victim of naivety and ignorance, you didn't know any better than to not let him see you. Wandering towards the peculiar beast, even when a gut wrenching terror asked you to run; you were stubborn. You had asked - are you alright?
"What did you do?" You repeated again.
Tilting his head, he kept his unwavering gaze fixed on you. "As a matter of fact, I didn't do anything, wife." He paused, letting the horror shadow your features, "It was all you."
You needed to run.
The kanzashi, which was till then clasped in your hand firmly, fell down. A clank, you heard.
One step.
One step towards the door. He is standing afore you, the fingers of his upper right arm ran through your open hair, tangling in the roots, he yanked your head back.
"I don't remember, giving you the permission to leave."
Tears prickled your eyes as you tried to break free. Sukuna was having none of it. He dragged you by your hair towards the corpse of the boy. Your nails jabbed into his wrist while whimpers of anguish left your mouth.
Sukuna shoved you down to your knees, tugging your hair back - you were sure, they will be ripped off if he puts any more pressure - he made you glance at its face. He crouched beside you. With a flick of his finger, he ripped the blindfold out of the boy.
"Dare to shut your eyes."
Compliance had become second nature.
The body was rigid, skin turning blue. The veins on his arms were bulged out, his mouth wide open, filled with foam, trickling down his cheek, drying on it.
The sight caused you to gag.
Horrifying. His bloodshot eyes were wide open, protruding out of the sockets. Irises dilated in shape, which you considered humanly impossible. But what had your heart hammering in your chest wasn't the vivid details you saw on the corpse. It was the fact, that you recognized the boy. Son of that distant elder cousin, you'd seen once or twice in a year.
"Look at that, love." Sukuna cooed in your ear, forcing you to face the corpse.
You shook your head violently, clawing at his wrist - desperate to escape. Your heart thumped inside your ribcage, you could hear it in your ears, your guts twisted in numerous ways as sweatbeads trailed down your forehead.
"You did that."
No. No, you didn't. You didn't do it. It wasn't you.
"You killed him."
No, you didn't... he didn't die because of you.
"Take a good look. See what you've done."
You vigorously shook your head. Denying all of his claims cause... cause they were... false, yes, false. They were false.
"No," You stated once you found your voice. "N-no, no... I- no."
Sukuna hummed, twisting a knot in your hair, "Yes, you. You did it."
No. You were innocent. You weren't to be blamed. It wasn't you.
It was... him.
"No, no, I didn't," You refused again, standing your ground. Moving your eyes towards him, you gritted your teeth. "No, I didn't do it. I didn't do anything. It was you."
"Really? How so?"
Fire burnt in your eyes. It was enough. He couldn't make you believe which you didn't commit - you didn't kill him.
"Poison," You said with conviction lacing your tone. "He was poisoned, a stab wouldn't procure such a reaction."
"Observant as ever," He mused, quirking up an eyebrow. A faint smile curled up on his lips. "Still, it doesn't gratify the fact that you were the one to end his life."
Blood boiled inside you, surging through your veins like lava. He had no right to accuse you of something. You didn't kill him, he couldn't make you believe it, whatsoever may happen.
"I may have stabbed him with the kanzashi, but that didn't have any trace of poison in it. I am-"
"Sure of it?"
You could only glare at him. He was toying with you. Tugging the strings of your conscience but you won't have any of it. "I am," You confirmed, staring at him without any falters. "I held it... you held it. If it was really drenched with toxicant as lethal as that, we- we both would be dead."
His grip loosened from your hair, hand falling down. The corners of his eyes crinkled, the smile turning into a smirk.
"It was you," You continued. "You did something to him at first and-"
Sukuna broke into a chortle of laughter. Far from jovial, more so sinister, filled with sheer malevolence. He gripped your jaw, pulling you closer to himself. His sharp canines glinted in the dim light.
"You just keep on fascinating me, wife."
Each second with him was revolting. Just his touch alone had your skin crawling. Yet, you couldn't let
"We had a pact," You stated firmly. His game was disgusting. What was he trying to do? What was his goal? "If I stay with you, you wouldn't lay a finger on my family, then- h-how could-"
"I would still stand on the ground, that I didn't do anything." He replied, a hint of amusement in his tone. "It was all you, wife. I can assure you that I didn't go back in my words." His canines glinted while he smiled. "Not a flick of pain. Save for..." He paused, his eyes widening, the carmine irises glowed in the dark. "Save for telling him, he'd be killed by a snake bite."
"There was no venom on my pin."
"Know so," He confirmed, a playful smirk on his visage. You wished you could read minds, if possible only of him, that'd been enough. Then where did poison come from? You wanted to question but he beat you to it.
"His fear turned into poison."
You blinked. Once. Twice. You knew he had an urge to play mind games but this was ridiculous. You questioned, shell-shocked, "What?"
"He let his fear get the better of him, assuming your pin to be a snake. He believed it." He explained while you listened without so much as a word. "His conscience caused his body to give out the exact reactions, he imagined. A shock, you might say. That caused his death."
His game was disgusting. If he thought, he could just give you any excuse as this and let you believe his accusations then he was mad wrong. You gritted your teeth, yanking your face away from his grip. For a second, you saw all of his eyes opening wide with surprise. But that didn't extinguish the fire burning in you.
He reached out, dragging you towards him via the arm. A glare resting on his face. "What did I tell about refusi-"
"I don't believe you," You cut him off, hands clenched into fists. It was the first time in a long time, you lost your composure in front of him. No, you wouldn't play as his doll anymore. He broke his promise, its only fair that you do so. "I don't believe a single word you say. You- you did something, you must have. Fear, belief, whatever the fuck, something as trivial as that-"
"So you think fear is trivial, wife?" He sighed, his clutch in your arm remained firm. The rough callouses of his palm, rubbed over your skin. "And here I thought, you might be different than the rest. But you managed to drop below my expectations."
"Maybe that's what I love about you, darling." He continued.
Disgust arose in you, yet again. Love. As if he had any of that. He wasn't capable of love. Not in this lifetime. Never. 
He spoke again, "Times you are the smartest I have seen, then you speak such blasphemy which would even embarrass the Gods you worship. Your silence was awarded by him leaning near your ear. He twisted a curl of your hair between his fingers. "Fear, wife..." He whispered to you. "Fear is a mind killer. It makes you believe anything. The small drop of poison which contaminates all the water."
"In the end, belief and fear are sides of the same coin," His top two eyes, flickered to the corpse of the boy. "I made him consume the poison of fear and you-" He turned to you again. "You made him believe it... so, in a way, yes. Yes, I did do something. Save for the part of ending his life. Though I didn't break my part of our pact." A smirk tugged on his lips. "You were the one who killed him. Isn't that great?"
Your breath hitched, throat gone dry. You gazed at him, eyes wide open. Your mind was a blank canvas.
Fear, poison, belief, killing...
He made you kill someone. An innocent boy who didn't even do anything.
Why won't he much rather just end your life?
Sukuna pulled away from you, standing up, he walked over to the lantern placed in the room. The stench of the rotting corpse had long ago started to pool in.
"You made me kill him." You whispered, still knelt, staring at the floor. When greeted with silence, you questioned again, a tone higher, "You made me kill him."
"And?"
His nonchalance had always been infuriating to you.
You could feel him standing a few steps behind you. "If you really wanted to kill my kin, you should've just told me. Getting your herbs was a tiring chore." You didn't miss the emphasis he put on, herbs. You could see him, rolling his eyes while speaking. "However, the taste of taking a life - isn't it delicious, wife?"
Guilt gnawed at you, tearing you internally. Your shoulders trembled as you let out ragged breaths, eyes fixed on the bloodied arm of the boy. The same arm where the kanzashi pierced, the muscles torn apart, blood drying on it due to the boy's onslaught. Nausea overrode your senses, bile rose up your throat and the next moment you were throwing up. The wastes ran down your mouth, your nails dug into the wooden - bruising your fingertips and chipping the nails. You don't realize Sukuna stepping up to your side, pulling your hair back while you were caught into the ordeal.
A disapproving grunt left his mouth after you were finished, yanking you up with your wrist. He pulled you towards the door. "Com-"
"No." Your heels remained firm on the ground. You refused him before you could even think. He turned towards you slightly, a scowl resting on his features before he pivoted around. He cast a glare upon you but before he could speak, your mouth opened again.
"You're even lower than scum." Your jaw ticked, hands clenching into fists. "You made me kill an innocent boy. Someone who might have done nothing to you, You– You disgust me, Sukuna."
Done you were with the respect, he demanded. If that angered him, made him want to rip out your heart and watch the life drain from your eyes. He was most welcome.
But it looks like, he wasn't resorting to any of that.
"You made me a murderer." You urged, staying strong in your stance. "You turned me into you."
His eyebrow twitched, a wave of mirth washed over him. "You were always like me, wife."
"I am nothing-"
"You're. You are like me. You are no saint, as you think so of yourself. " He said, leaving no room for argument. His lips pressed tight into a thin line. 
Yet, you refused to believe that. You were nothing like him. Couldn't even dream so. You were not him.
"You kill children in your womb, I kill them, after they're born. How is it so different?"
"It is different." You yelled, your jaw clenched, teeth baring out. "This world needs no more of your lineage, it needs no more of you." You jabbed your pointer finger on his chest, tears pooling into your eyes. You refused to shed them. "I kill for your own sake, I do not."
"Then who do you kill for?"
"For everyone." The faint snort of his reached your ears. You couldn't decipher what he found so delightful in this.
"Playing God, are we?" He mocked causing your vexation to rise.
"Maybe I am. For the least, I am not killing innocent people like you."
From where such defiance arose, you weren't sure of. Perhaps, all the frustration, fright, terror which accumulated till now had reached its limit. Moreover, Sukuna's provocation must be the fuel to the fire.
You might be left bleeding– No, you would be left bleeding. You welcomed it with open arms.
.
"Careful," Sukuna pushed a strand of your hair behind your ear. "All Gods aren't worshipped."
He was enjoying himself. In all honesty, your obedience was getting too monotonous. This was better. Your defiance was amusing. Arousing, if there's to add. If he knew, letting you end a few lives would have this effect then he would have resorted to this long ago.
"Better than you." You shoved his hand away, "You are nothing more than a wretched, two-faced curse destroying all of our lives."
He noted your scowl, the way your lips were shut tight, your eyebrows crinkled together. Reasons evident, all he desired was to pull you into his arms smash his lips against yours. Taste the very essence of your being. Consume you wholly, just the way you are. So that in the end, your name, your taste, your scent would be engraved in his very soul. Without your mention, he wouldn't be complete. 
But he refrained from giving in now. His desire extended to a far more sinister route. "I wonder..."
What would it be like to break your conviction? What would it be like to break you?
Oh, he knew.
Would it be right moment to let you know? Maybe he should wait for another, more appropriate time.
Hmm, perhaps he should. But no.
He let you play these games for too long. Tired of this game plan, he was. Maybe, you would just come to your senses if he let you know. So he let the words, flow out:
"I wonder, why this curse keeps protecting your pathetic life from people who would cross rivers to lay siege to your life?"
Worth everything.
Sukuna watched as your face lost its color. The previous boldness you presented him with was replaced by a mask of confusion and. Such a pretty sight, it was. To see you, falter from your stand. Second guess, yourself, be in denial then rage consumes you. And you look at him, like he was the forbearer of your misery. (He is).
Oh, how good he has you memorized.
Even the littlest of reactions you contort on your mien, on your mannerisms; everything has him intrigued. You have him intoxicated.
"You know the ones, the people... your people, for whom you play this God."
Sukuna wished he could capture this moment. He'd have the chance to take a glimpse of it again, whenever he wished to. The horrified look on your face as the weight of his words started to sink in.
Would you still look like this if he tells you the terror he bestowed on them who tried to steal you away from him? What would you say if he vividly describes each imagery of how he slowly, agonizingly burnt them, severed them and tormented them? Leaving them nothing but fragments beyond recognition.
You were his. All of you belonged to him. Without his sanction, no one could even see you, let alone touch you. Ah- just how many sorcerers perished from his hands, the number of villages, bathed in blood; save for yours. (Courtesy to that stupid pact, he forged with you)
Something had told him, that there'd be a better time to put an end to the pitiful lives of your kin.
"Can't speak? What caused so, darling?" His tone was laced with smugness, a twisted joy elicited in him. "Fearful that your play amounted to nothing?"
Your jaw ticked with anger. You were furious. "I don't believe you. You are lying."
Your trust on humans was commendable, he'd give you that. However, there's stark contrast between faith and blind belief. You were inclining towards the latter.
So, what do they do when words fail to convey message? Oh right, you give them a prime example.
"Let me just show it to you then, wife."
It was a gamble, he was willing to make. To keep you with him, forever, as he wanted - he needed you to know that no place other than his arms would be as comforting. Even if that meant breaking your very soul, so be it.
.
You were home.
One moment, Sukuna held your gaze. The next, you are standing before your hearth.
Toes dipping into the familiar black soil, the land where you ran and played during your childhood. Your familial home stood steps away from you. Still looked the same except the visible cracks on the wall, a layer of dust on top of the door and the woods looked worn out. However, what caught your eyes weren't the flaws of your home but the familiar older woman walking into your home.
"Mother…"
She stilled all of a sudden, rotating on her heels, her eyes landed on you. Shell shocked, that's what she was with the widened eyes and parted lips. A small smile curved up on your lips, she still looked the same except the few grey hairs and wrinkles aside her eyes.
"Mother," You called again, taking a step towards her. "I am back."
Sooner than you expected, her eyebrows scrunched up, mouth curving down when she finally registered your presence. You weren't some illusion or her mind playing tricks. "What are you here for?"
The disdainful tone caused you to flinch. You didn't expect this. Returning home, you dreamt of it to be filled with tears of joy and warm embraces. Not this… whatever, she was presenting you with. But- But its fine, you have returned after a two whole years. She must have been worried. The reason of her apprehension. God, you had a lot making up to do.
"Well, you know," You chuckled lightly, scratching the back of your neck. "Back… just back. I have returned."
"Found your way after two years?" She crossed her arms over her chest, staring at you with a look you didn't want to recognize.
You nodded, "Yes. How could I forget my way? Our address, its-"
You were interrupted when your name was spit out from her mouth. Her glare on you was palpable, "I know what it is. What are you here for?"
Her fury even made your skin crawl with fear. You were often on the receiving end of her glare when you were a child, given by your tendencies to run around and cause trouble for others. Yet, those glares, were none like this. This- this- you didn't want to name what it was.
"You are angry," You don't know if its directed towards your mother or yourself as you hold onto the last bit of fragments that not all is lost. "I get it, I really do." You stood on your toes, attempting to look behind her, into your house. "Where's father? Tell him, I am-"
"No more."
As if the air was knocked out of your lungs.
"What?" Your neck craned towards her so fast, it might have left a sprain. Yet, that was the least of your concern. "What do you mean by no more?"
"No more means no more." Your mother's sigh fell heavy on the air, words carried the weight of the world. Laid with pain underneath.
"How- when? Wha-what happened?" You couldn't wrap your mind around the new discovery. No one told you such. Who could've guessed? Such an ordeal to occur in your absence. And what might she be going through, without you. You didn't even get the chance to talk to him, one last time.
"A year ago," She confessed, her voice conveyed her lament and sorrow. Her words felt like a hammered blow on the fragile façade of hope, you had intricately crafted for yourself. However, she wasn't done. Her eyes held scorn, lips curled up to a sneer. "Aren't you satisfied? You finally made your mark. Must tell you," Her voice, once filled with love held nothing save for contempt, directed at you. "Good game, you played, dear." She spit the endearment as if, it were poison.
"No, I- I never wanted any of this. What are you even talking about?" A trembling footfall towards her, you whispered, "M-mother-"
"Don't you dare call me that."
The weight of her judgement felt heavy on you, pressing down, suffocating you alike chains.
"You are no daughter of mine."
You weren't aware since when the tears had sprang up your eyes, breaking the barricades, they shed down. Your throat burnt as you struggled to even breathe, clutching your chest - a searing pain shooting in your heart. Your heart was shattering from the ultimate rejection from your own flesh and blood.
"While you're at it, know this." Your mother continued.
The next words were like a blow to the gut, each syllable lined with the weight of revelations. Ones that hung in the air like a funeral shroud.
"In his last moments, his only regret was bringing a daughter like you in this world."
.
This night just doesn't seem to end, does it?
You were left as a hollow shell. Tethering the steps away from the home you were no more welcomed. Exhaustion reigned heavy on you. Physically and mentally.
Where were you going? You didn't know. Just where your feet would take you, there would you go. Perhaps, you can return to Sukuna. Would he take you back? Most probably not. Considering, your earlier outburst, adding to the fact that you refused to give him what you want; he might just discard you as you proved to be useless.
Funny. It was so damn funny. Once, you wished to escape from his hands whatsoever the price yet now… now you considered returning to him.
You could hear him calling you pathetic. Disgusting. More disgusting, that you agreed with him.
You were truly pathetic.
But before you could spiral down the void of self-hatred, a voice- nah, multiple voices startled you.
"There she is, parading around some meek, innocent girl." A scoff is added. "You are far from it."
"The nerve of you to just walk back into our lives after you betrayed us."
Your neck cranes to your left, an old man - the village elder with a few other men and women following behind; they approached you. "Excuse me?"
"Who do you think you are?" A woman's cry reached your ears. "Returning after you turned your back on us."
You flinched at the accusation thrown. What could be possibly be instigating? To all your knowledge, you were walking in this- in your village after two long years. Anger, disdain and accusatory glares clouded their features. If your mother's insults weren't enough to pierce through your heart then it certainly did now, with all the people, you once called your own to look at you like you were the monster.
You summoned the least bit of courage you had, squared your shoulders and started, "I'd have you know-"
"Traitors don't get to speak." At the center of the crowd was the village elder. He was the pillars of your hamlet, revered for his wisdom and guidance, but now he looked akin a judge ready to deliver his sentence upon you. A sentence which would push you more into this conundrum. "You've been cavorting to that monster. Disgusting."
"I am no traitor." You retorted soon. "You can't accuse me of such when you don't ev-"
"Save it for someone who would care, whore."
The curse had your mouth parted in disbelief, horror etched upon your mien. Sooner than you could compose yourself, did whispers of agreement rippled through the crowd which branded you as a traitor.
"You are just as twisted as him."
"Get out of here if you so much as hold your life dear."
"Don't play as the innocent bitch, now."
The accusation hung in the air like a dark cloud, poisoning the atmosphere with its venomous hatred. Your breath was caught in your throat as you searched desperately for words to defend yourself; the crowd's hostility rendered you speechless. But amidst the cacophony of condemnation, one voice stood out above the rest.
I wonder, why this curse keeps protecting your pathetic life from people who would cross rivers to lay down yours?
Really? Were you really recalling his words now? Now of all times… You truly were pathetic.
For one moment, You just stayed silent - letting their accusations bore you down. Somewhere you wished all of it were just a nightmare. You'll soon wake up on your bed beside Sukun- fuck! Since when did you start to expect to wake up with him? He- He was toying with your mind. This was the only result. But the fact that this was your thought process had you recoil back.
The next moment, everything made sense.
These accusations were stemmed from the fact that you- you were proclaimed to be the wife of the King of curses. Your unwillingness to return, given for the pact you forged with Sukuna, was taken as your cue that you betrayed your family, your home, your people.
Your family despised you. Your people despised you. The very same people you chose to protect were turning their back on you.
Did they truly try to lay down your life?
Amidst your plight, you didn't register when the village elder marched up to you. "Didn't you hea-" His trial at speech was cut off. Nay, his lifeline was cut off. (Humorous, isn't it?)
Numerous red lines appeared on his body before it burst off into a globs of flesh and blood. Blood which splashed onto you, marring your visage and attire with its hues.
He was here. You knew it. You could feel it.
For some reason, it filled you with a sense of relief.
However, your people were on the other end of the rope. The eyes which afore held hatred and disgust, they were now filled with horror and fright. In this reverie as the villagers started to flee, a torch tumbled on the ground - lighting the grass on fire. The winds showed no mercy, as the howls increased, so did the flames.
Provoking him was never the right move.
You were digging your own grave.
So you shouldn't have been surprised that your wish would be granted. Yet, if you could have one wish then you'd wish for freedom but no- freedom was a forfeited dream, far beyond your reach. Consideration of that one would never be fruitful. You are trapped even in your dreams.
Playing with fire only gets you burnt.
For long, you played this game and this- this was your compensation. For everything you had done until now, all you are returned with was abandonment. Not that supposedly, betrayal, yes. More appropriate.
Flames surrounded you, crawling up your skin, the screams piercing your ears, your chest heaved up and down. Gaze, once settled on your hearth, now all you saw were the burning huts, the crackling of embers reached your ears. Attire and hands stained with blood of the insolent.
No one touches what's mine.
The warning shouldn't have been taken lightly. Should have known, the extent of his power.
Eyes held terror, fright, regret- whatever you could name. The multitude of names you received seemed no more than a distant dream, nowhere to be found. All were running away - expectable.
You expected calamity, but you were calm.
The sparks danced over your irises as everything went down in the crimson hues. Save for you, you weren't burning. Not an spark touched your skin. Was it the distance or the control? Who knows. But one confirmation which you held was that - tonight you won't die. Not so soon either.
Careful, not all Gods are worshipped.
The words rang in your ears and as if on cue, you found him again. In this trance of insanity, only one thing held your sight when you attempted to turn - The eyes tinted with crimson.
All of a sudden, something burnt inside you too.
Unbridled rage consumed you. Your chest heaved up and down as ragged breath left your mouth. Their words came back to you, ringing in your ears as if you were pushed into a void.
Who do you think you are? Returning after you turned your back on us.
Would this bitch even be alive if you prioritized yourself?
Don't play as the innocent bitch, now.
Is that the thanks you get for trying to protect them?
Traitors don't get to talk.
Traitor… fine, you'd be the traitor.
With caution you took one step towards him. No reaction. Your chance - you took another. Then another and another. You stood before him, with nothing save for a void etching your features. Amusement flickered over him, the corner of his lip curled up.
"Saw it for yourself wife?"
Seemed like silence was your go-to response lately. From your peripheral, you saw the burning houses, the distant screams reached you. For some reason, the screams were almost soothing. You revelled in this. Their gut wrenching shrieks were like a balm to your essence.
Their predicament was your solace.
Sounded like someone you knew. Someone who had warned you about them but you chose to remain ignorant. Sickening… were you becoming like him?
You were always like me, wife.
You could laugh. Maybe you were like him.
"Let's forge another pact?" You offered, keeping your eyes pinned on him.
"A pact?"
"A pact."
A smirk curved up his lips, the upper pair of arms crossed over his chest, "Humour me, love."
The smirk wasn't directly for you. But he did. So you returned it too. An equal one with an equal malicious intent. Cause in that moment, no second thoughts, no doubts clouded your mind. And so, you uttered the blasphemy:
"You kill them all, each and everyone. In return, I will stay with you, give you an heir. Whatever you want from me."
.
A year later
Screams died down after a gruelling ten hours.
"Good news, Sukuna sama. It's a boy."
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A/N: Honestly, I was almost done with this fic, long ago but while writing the climax, I kept thickening out with all the self-doubts but then I just wrote what I wanted. I do understand if the ending is not up to your liking and I sincerely apologize for it.
However, thanks for reading up till the end. I enjoyed writing this a lot. Some feedback is appreciated <3
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munariplans · 3 days
Note
Hello there, Your writing deserves a Michelin star. I eat it up every time and I’m NEVER disappointed. Thank you. If I may, I’d request (in a very polite and “no pressure” tone) a fic about Natasha and spider-reader regarding the Odesa mission Natasha outlines in The Winter Solider or a “first time” fic for the couple if you are comfortable.
Keeping doing what you are doing. You are great at it. In the meantime, I will be talking to Michelin about getting you more stars.
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synopsis: based on the request for the odessa mission above! plus a backstory and a little character exploration of our spidey!reader, wherein the mission highlights a little of their dynamic too.
natasha romanoff x reader
word count: 3.4k words
a/n: i'm back :) thank you everyone for your patience, and i hope you enjoy this one.
masterlist
a thumb brushing over your own. her knee pressed up against yours. her scent calming your senses down. natasha was beside you, red hair a stark contrast to the all-black tactical suit. on her face, was a comforting look. she didn’t smile, but she didn’t need to. her being there was enough. 
“you okay?” you knew she knew something was troubling you deeply. but for the sake of the mission, yours and her sanity, and the engineer sitting behind the both of you at the train station, she didn’t ask. you thought she did it so naturally, being able to comfort you. 
you didn’t know it was taking all she had in her not to freak out. she wasn’t sure if this was what people did, or how best she could do to comfort you. she could only reciprocate what she found she liked best when you comforted her. but in the presence of everyone else, she couldn’t do the last thing you always did for her; pull her into the tightest hug and let the world itself disappear away. she knew the both of you needed to be half-alert, at least. 
natasha felt like she was the one breathing out a sigh of relief when the wrinkles in your forehead disappeared slightly, your own thumb rubbing hers back. “yeah, i–i’m fine.”
“do you want to talk about it…?” she was pushing her luck. 
you looked back at the engineer. he was asleep. the contact for the rental car wasn’t due to arrive in an hour. natasha looked back at him as well, and offered you a small smile, “ninety percent of the mission’s done anyway. simple in and out, get him transported back to SHIELD. makes me wonder why fury asked us both. maybe he felt guilty for sending you away on that undercover for so long; let us have a little bit of a workcation together.”
your mind was screaming at you; but you shrugged and gave her a smile back. “yeah. maybe he did.”
she didn’t know that you and her had separate missions, after all. while hers had been to sneak into the research facility and escort the engineer out, and transport him safely back to SHIELD, you had been informed that there would be…obstacles, in the way. you just didn’t know when.
you remembered the meeting with fury well. you had told him, that with such a statute and reputation the winter soldier had, that you weren’t confident of taking him alone, especially in a place so out of your element. but he had reassured you that you would be fine, and that you should focus on your own assignment when the time came, while natasha focused hers solely on the engineer. you had thought it wasn’t very fair. natasha deserved to know of any dangers, at least, that might pop up, but fury insisted that since it was one of her first few missions as a team lead, he hadn’t wanted to shake her confidence. you had no choice but to comply. 
turning your attention back to the hand holding yours, you squeezed it for a moment, then said, “when we get back, can we…just…have a break around the chrysler building? the rooftop, just you and me?”
natasha nodded. she understood. and she didn’t push.
when the three of you finally reached odessa, you sat with the engineer as natasha convinced the guards to let you through without passports. knowing russian, aided with a heavy handed helping of flirting and subtle lowering of her zipper, definitely did wonders. and while nervous as you were, spider-senses tingling all over for the winter soldier, you still managed to let out a less-than-annoyed tsk when she returned, taking great care to zip up the rest of her suit and glaring at the guards behind her. 
“careful,” she smirked, hand reaching for your cheek to turn your eyes to her, “they won’t let us through if they don’t at least find it believable that they can have me.”
“no one else can have you,” you replied, but she was already walking towards the car, hips swaying purposefully so, and another wave of irritation crept up upon you, “no one, you hear me?”
natasha waited for the engineer to get in, before chuckling and looking back at you. “are you getting in, spidey?”
when you had safely passed the borders and began driving on the snowy, white roads, natasha unbuckled her seatbelt for a minute, before pulling you in from your attention on the road to steal your breath with her lips. it was only when the cherry from her lipstick had fully melted into the heat of your mouth did she let go, panting just as hard as you were. you were very thankful the roads were empty. 
“god, i love it when you get jealous,” she muttered. 
to her displeasure, however, the engineer behind let out a disgusted scoff, and murmured, “you guys know i’m here, right?”
“yes, and we don’t mind returning you right back to HYDRA if you complain one more time,” you replied.
at a gas station pit stop, natasha knew it was wrong to pry, but she caught a glimpse of your wallet as you paid for snacks on the trip, and an old, almost-faded picture of a younger you next to an older woman was all that her eyes could zero on. you were in a new, freshly-ironed SHIELD uniform, and the woman had her hand on your shoulder, grin mirroring yours. natasha had never seen her before. 
you shut the wallet promptly after, and natasha trailed behind as you both returned to your car. 
about an hour into the drive later, with the engineer’s soft snores behind the both of you, and natasha’s own eyes drooping, she knew she had to keep the both of you awake somehow. 
“you can take a nap, it’s okay,” you told her, but she sat up, the sight of your wallet on the dashboard reminding her of her curiosity earlier. 
she angled her head to face you, admiring the older, finer lines on your face that grew more beautiful as time passed. the younger you couldn’t compare to the sight she was treated to now. 
“you always this good-looking, or did something happen when you were younger, to turn you like this?” she decided to start. 
a tint of red on your cheeks, you chuckled nervously. “um…i don’t think….no. i’ve always been like this.” 
“was SHIELD your first job?”
“my first job was when i was twelve. worked for a car mechanic near my place. then i took up newspaper delivery, then a restaurant, researched for my university, and a ton of other jobs,” you said sheepishly, “i wasn’t…that well-to-do.” 
she let her thumb caress your cheek. you relaxed a little more. “what did you study?”
“quantum physics. full-ride scholarship, or i never would’ve been able to afford those years.” 
then, after a beat of silence, you continued. “it was also where fury found me. recruited me to SHIELD intelligence then. i guess you could say it was my first official job. i wasn’t…uh…wasn’t supposed to be front-facing, you know? i wasn’t a combat agent or anything, just the intelligence. i was in intelligence for five years.” 
“what changed?” 
you looked at her through the mirror, eyes carrying an emotion natasha could not quite figure out. you looked away again, before sighing. “intelligence got bombed one day, everything was on fire. i was helping my teammates escape, was one of the last few out, and a burning pillar fell on me. i almost died then, paralysed from the waist down. i guess nick felt bad, that the medal of bravery he awarded could only do so much to my current situation. felt even worse when he saw my mother crying by my side. he gave me a second chance.”
“the spider serum.”
“it was experimental then, i believe the number of exclusion of liability clauses i signed reached the hundreds. i was lucky it worked. there were a few others…not so lucky ones.”
natasha reached over the console to where your leg was shaking, and she ran her palm up and down, helping you regain your sanity. “thank you for telling me.”
“it’s not–” you never finished your sentence, because in the next second, your senses overloaded with warning signals, and your hands moved quicker than your brain in swerving the car, the steering wheel jammed to the left so the bullets that you barely saw incoming landed on the car’s tires instead of the glass and right at the engineer. you remembered the engineer screaming as the car skidded off of the cliff, and you remembered jumping out right then to shoot a hanger web to save it from falling completely and crashing onto the ground. 
you groaned as you gripped onto the web, feet planted on the ground as you tried pulling the car back up. you have to be quick, quicker than this. he’s here, your mind ran through those thoughts, but your arms were burning. you pulled little by little, hoping natasha was protecting the engineer down below, and the car was moving. it was probably a minute before it was near the edge, and you had one last pull left to bring it up again. 
but of course, right as the wheel of the car barely touched the ground you were on again, a blunt force came ramming to the side of your head. you could hear the metal whirring of the winter soldier’s metallic arm as you felt the webs slip from your fingers, sending the car right over again.
luckily, the last of your webbings managed to catch on the railings of the edge of the cliff, preventing the car from crashing, but merely hanging precariously in the air. 
the blaring pain in the right side of your head was all-too-consuming, but you managed to recover and gather yourself quickly enough, to see him in full view, stature almost twice of yours, face looking down to where the car was hanging. then, the winter soldier raised his rifle, and taking aim, you flew off from where you were to tackle him, throwing him off as the bullet landed astray. he grunted in annoyance, fighting you off as you tried snatching his gun off of him. your legs were straddling his torso, holding him down as the gun was wrestled between the two of you. from below, natasha was holding onto the engineer’s arm, watching the fight as she tried to figure out an alternative escape plan; rather than merely relying on you.
but when the winter soldier felt the gun finally slipping away from his hands, instead of pulling it back, however, he gave one final grunt, before pulling you in. the air was knocked out of your lungs as he slammed the both of you against the railing, his metal arm then travelling to your neck, squeezing as tight as he could. 
natasha watched in horror as you struggled against his hold, her heart dropping to the pit of her stomach as the winter soldier began choking you. it didn’t look like a fight you could win, and her hand went to the handgun in her thigh holster, taking a leap of faith and shooting at him. 
the bullet riveted off his metal arm, but it was enough. the man took his eyes off of you for a moment, and zeroed in on natasha. unfortunately, it meant that he noticed the engineer behind her too, and immediately, he threw you off of the cliff, and came closer to her. she wished she had the capacity to worry about you, but she was immediately obligated to protect the engineer first.
she angled her body over his, heart pumping in her chest as the winter soldier took aim again. from how she was shielding the engineer, and the angle the winter soldier was at, there was no way he would have a clear aim. he wouldn’t take the shot. 
surely not, she thought, as his gun clicked. surely not, she thought again, as the look in his eyes became empty, almost as if he was seeing through her. surely not. he pulled the trigger. 
the last thing natasha could register was the burning sear on the side of her stomach, before she was falling straight into the sea below. 
on your end, you caught the moment right as the shot was fired, and immediately jumped off of where you landed to catch both bodies falling through the air before they hit impact and broke the surface of the water. while you were thankful that natasha’s distraction worked, it was even more horrifying to have to pull her body out of the water beside the engineer’s, your eyes fixated on the gaping wound on her stomach. 
you dragged them to shore, and it was then that you noticed both of them were bleeding out, the wound on natasha was bigger than you imagined, and the bullet was still lodged within the engineer, you were sure, as he grappled with a neck that was drenched in red. he was struggling to breathe, mouth opening and closing desperately as the blood loss incapacitated him. 
you were cruelly reminded of your own assignment to capture and / or kill the winter soldier, as you glanced upwards to where he was, half-expecting him to be gone already. but he was there, standing still and watching you. almost as if he was challenging you. the hatred rumbling in your heart could not account for the disappointment you felt in already failing the mission. he held eye contact with you, gun no longer aiming at either you or natasha, but instead tucked into safety. his head tilted for a moment, you heard a car pulling up a few seconds later, and he broke eye contact first. entering the car leisurely, he made his getaway without pursuit.
you contemplated giving chase, swinging upwards and taking him down. killing him with your own bare hands, for what he did to natasha, stuffing his own gun down his throat– 
natasha shuddered underneath you, and those thoughts were gone as fast as they came, replaced by the instinctive need to stay and make sure she makes it out of this alive. you gathered the first aid materials from the boot of the hanging car, cursing when you dug through the kit and only found the bare minimum. half a roll of bandages, stitches, and some antiseptic. barely enough to only keep one of them alive.
when you made it back down, the engineer was seizing, and you had to turn him on his side and stabilise him for a brief moment, the coldness in your fingers not merely from the frozen waters you had just come out of. natasha, clutching onto her side, managed to notice your dilemma, and the materials you had, and her hand reached out for yours. 
she was shaking, and on the verge of bleeding out, but her hands were more steady than yours. she knew. she shook her head as you began grabbing the antiseptic for her wound. 
“save him. they…they…need him more,” she choked out, eyes darting between you and the engineer, but the tears brimming in your eyes barely noticed it. you swallowed down a broken sob, looking between the two one last time, before making your final decision. 
fuck the assignment. fuck fury, and SHIELD, and anyone else who was going to punish you for saving natasha, anyone who even thought of saving the engineer over natasha, anyone who thought natasha was more dispensable than the engineer. you let go of natasha’s hand, and began working on her, despite her protests. the antiseptic splashed onto her wound, the stitches came weaving through her skin, you tuned out everything else to save the woman you loved first.
even the engineer groaning beside you. even his hand gripping faintly on your suit, him pleading, “i…have a family…a kid…back home. p-please.”
a kid back home. i’m killing this man with a kid back home. you were the worst person in the world, you were sure, as you spared a look at him, his lips blue and pale by then. natasha had used up all the supplies then, so all you could do was hold his hand, angling him at a half-sitting position against your body, and murmuring i’m sorry to him about a thousand times. 
“...please.”
“i’m sorry. i’m so sorry.” you were killing the main objective of the mission. you were killing an innocent man because of your own selfishness. 
his blood was on you, literally and figuratively, as your hands could only do so much to press against the bullet wound and try to prevent him from dying so soon. but it was imminent; he was never going to make it back, and you and him knew it. the bullet was still lodged somewhere in the back of his neck, and life was leaving his eyes. 
you held him until he took his last breath, still apologising. 
— 
when you reached out to check on natasha for a moment, her skin was getting colder then, too. the stitches and bandages could only hold for so long, and her condition would drop steadily if you didn’t make a move soon. there was no time to wait for help to arrive. so you made the final decision to rest the engineer’s body to where emergency services could easily find him, made a call for help, and promptly brought natasha home first. 
it was inevitable that you were suspended for almost a year for what you did. you had taken the brunt of the punishment, and volunteered to take natasha’s end of it too. fury had never looked more disappointed, and upper management had a field day berating you for your poor decision-making. you distinctly remembered one of them yelling at fury that you were the reason why they should implement a relationship ban among agents. 
you should have known better. you knew you should have done better, as well. more than blaming the winter soldier, everybody could see that it was your own self that you placed the heaviest blame on. the team also knew you would have almost lost yourself, if not for natasha. 
she gave you a second chance this time, making clear that you were the only one she would trust to help her get back on her feet, to help her heal. you were reluctant to ever leave the training grounds, to even let yourself handle any other mission other than getting back stronger and better, but she was there. she always was, and she ensured that you wouldn’t regret saving her instead, even if she also thought it had been a difficult choice. 
when you lay in bed each night after her recovery, tracing the scar on her stomach and killing yourself in your own mind, she would run through her fingers through your hair, reminding you to get out of the headspace. when you doubted your abilities even in training the younger agents, she would back you up. even when you made the weekly visits to the engineer’s home back in the states, helping out his wife and apologising for your failure to her family. she knew even supporting his child financially for the rest of his life wasn’t enough for you. 
odessa was probably the biggest failure in your career as a SHIELD agent. and there was no happy end, or satisfying outcome, you would have achieved then. but at least having natasha through the journey of your recovery from that, helped your growth and acceptance in part.
when she would be asleep beside you most nights in the years after, you would often sneak out and, in the quite space between your balcony and the rooftop of the building, tell yourself that you would have done the same thing over if you were placed in the situation again.
natasha liked to think of herself as cold, her personality and actions as impersonal as things got. she was never sure she was doing right by you, or able to comfort you as much as you comfort her. but clearly, she was quite the opposite.
most nights when you came back after your hours alone, pondering over the day of the incident over and over again, you would look at her sleeping figure on your shared bed, and think to yourself how no one was able to know you the way she knew you. no one came close.
she was your sanctuary as much as you were hers.
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astrecium · 1 day
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𓍯 that one specific special day.
CW. pronouns for reader are (you/your), modern au? Reader likes sweets. (does this count as a warning?×.×)
summary. Kuni trying his best to make you have a nice birthday.
A/N. My birthday is close so I decided to do this soo.. happy birthday to whoever is reading this !! By the way, do y'all mind the small letters? Or do y'all like the big ones more?🥲 Had to rewrite this🥲
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He can't say he understands the concept or birthdays, he can't get what is the happiness on being closer and closer to your death. But, he understands that for you, it's something special, and he would do his best to make you happy on this day.
Believe it or not, he would never forget what day your birthday is. He has it craved on his mind, something he would never dare himself to forget, since he know this action would disappoint you. In the day, he wouldn't even sleep, trying to prepare the best day for you.
‘I could do better than this if I had become a god.’ the thought would cross his mind, which he would instantly brush away, not letting such trivial bothers ruin his focus. At 00:00, he would be awake, thinking on what to do before you wake up. ‘breakfast, maybe.’ yes, that will do for the morning. Wanderer would spend the whole night trying to cook your favorite dish, paying attention to every small detail, and doing his best even though he had no idea on how to cook things like that. But fortunately, the final result was better than expected. The image of the small cake was good, but just as you yourself told him, looks aren't everything. He hated sweets, yet he had to do the sacrifice of discovering if it tasted good.
After putting his finger somewhere discreet of the cake, he hesitantly puts it on his mouth. ‘eugh.’ it was sweet, just how you liked it. It was good, for you obviously.
He would cover the damaged part of where his finger damaged, leaving it perfect like it was before. 01:30 would show up on the clock. He needed to be faster. Placing your cake on the fridge, he didn't know if juice suits morning.. though, you'll probably wake up late today. If not, he'll have his way.
But even though he knew how to cook, celebrations were new for him. He had to search on what do to on someone's birthday. "What to write in a birthday card(so that they'll actually want to keep it)" he found a site, and immediately clicked.
It was so... Cringe. Corny. Or.. maybe he just wasn't used to seeing caring words. He looked at the birthday he card he had bought just yesterday, and though in writing just 'happy birthday.' nothing else. But no, that's too dry. You deserve more than that. He decided to look a bit more into the site, trying to find something he finds acceptable.
But that took more time than expected, too. 02:00. He immediately put his phone down when he sees the time, going back to the kitchen. He was in a hurry and frustrated, but all he let out was a sigh.
After some time, he checked the clock again. 06:00. It took some time, and you should be waking up soon— wait nah! He didn't get the most important thing. He shoves his head on his hands, and sighs again. He knew you were waking up, so he went to your room.
When he saw your figure getting up, he gently pushed you back to bed.
‘nuh uh uh, go back to sleep.’ he covered you with a blanket after shoving you on the bed. You tried to get up again, b ut he shooshed you and got you back to sleep. ‘try again uh.. when it's 09:00.’ as if you could know what time it is when you are asleep. He doesn't mind it though, the more time he got the best.
He rushed to buy you a gift. But don't get this words wrong, he'll carefully look at everything on the store, carefully pick the one you would like the best, judge every small detail that could go unnoticed. It took him... 3 stores. He judged the soul of everything, to the shop workers to the items. He decided to buy your favorite drink too.
When he came home, you were still sleeping, thankfully. He sighed, relieved, and went to wake you up with the cake on his hands, carefully shaking you so the cake doesn't fall and you don't wake up annoyed. He has... War flashbacks on when you did so.
When you woke up, you saw him looking away, a gift box by your side, and a cake and your favorite drink on his hands. ‘dont you dare get used to this.’ he would say dryly, in contrast to the sweet actions he did. If you hugged him, you couldn't even see, but he would smile slightly, relieved that he managed to actually please you.
on the birthday card, which he would only give to you at the end of the day, the words written in soft and elegant writing were surprisingly sweet. The day you came into the world was one of the best days of my whole life. I hope today is one of your best days, too. But he doesn't dare to look at your face when he delivered it, looking away with his arms crossed, a faint red on his face. ‘you are smiling like a fool.’ he would say even though he lives to see you smile like that.
Huh, what do you mean your birthday doesn't last three days? He bought three cakes and even more!!! Bro probably bought you airpods and a giant plushie since he thought you liked hugging them to sleep and said it's nothing💀(I have a fic about this :0)
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Happy birthday to you 🫶
This is cringe im going to kms
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madaqueue · 3 days
Text
playlists
what a waste | "army dreamers" x kate bush
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synopsis: on what would have his twentieth birthday, you visit geto's grave
pairing: suguru geto x reader
themes/content: semi-canon curse au. angst. language. death/loss.
word count: 1.3k
a/n: here's some angst bc i've been in a mood for the past few days and am allergic to being happy!
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The grass is damp under your skin, the rain from this morning clinging to your clothes, the smell of wet earth lingering despite the absence of clouds in the sky. This is the closest it’s gotten to raining on this day in years, what would be a sign of late winter opening into spring, but today it just feels dreary and cold.
Sighing, you place the bouquet of lilacs - his favorites - onto the stone, careful to not cover the plaque adorning the granite. At this point you could recite it in its entirety without needing to see it, the words burned into your mind from the countless days you spent reading and rereading it, hoping that the shape of the characters would finally make it sink in.
Suguru Geto
Cherished and loved.
The epitaph still feels halfhearted, empty. Even though you and Satoru spent weeks trying to figure out what to write, everything you came up with felt hollow, unable to capture his essence. You wanted to do him justice, but you just couldn’t; he’s more than a plot of land and some words engraved in stone.
Of course, it’s a moot point: the grave is empty, anyways. After the fight against Toji, Shoko had to completely destroy his body, the risk of it being used maliciously too great. A shudder runs down your spine as you picture it, the cruelty of using your best friend’s corpse for something malevolent.
Would he notice? Would it bother him to know what had happened to his flesh? What makes a person, anyways; is it the body, or is it something else? You hope he doesn’t mind what had to happen to him after his heart quieted and his breathing stilled.
Are you at peace, Suguru?
You can’t help but wonder if, after everything, death brought him a respite from the pain he endured while alive. You knew the nature of his cursed technique, the necessary consumption of evil; in absorbing it, did it make him, too, evil? Was he plagued by the darkness he was destined to destroy?
You hope not. Despite the wickedness he witnessed, he nevertheless dreamed, hoping for a brighter future.
“What did you wanna be when you were a kid?” you ask through a mouthful of ramen.
Suguru sits across from you in the booth, forearms resting on the table as he eats his lunch. “What do you mean?” he questions, tilting his head ever so slightly.
“What did you want for a job? There’s no way you wanted to be a sorcerer,” you chuckle. “Like, I wanted to be one of those people who makes the cool brick patterns along sidewalks.”
He holds back a laugh at your answer. “I’m not sure, I don’t think I ever really thought about it.” He pauses, taking another bite of his food. “But I guess if I had to pick, probably a musician or something, maybe guitar, I always liked how they could make something sound beautiful with just their hands,” he muses softly.
“I could totally see you on a sick guitar,” you grin.
“Yeah, but I got my cursed technique too early. I never really got a chance to do anything but this,” he shrugs. “Maybe in another life.”
“Maybe,” you smile.
Now, the guitar you picked out for him, an acoustic one crafted in dark wood, sits in the back of your closet collecting dust. You were supposed to give it to him for his birthday. He was supposed to play it. He was supposed to be here, be alive, be celebrating with you.
Pain shoots up your palm as you look down, realizing your hands have been clenched into fists, your nails beginning to draw blood. Shaking out your arms you take in an uneven breath, a desperate attempt to steady yourself.
All the things he never got to do.
“I’m sorry, Suguru,” you whisper to yourself, placing a bloodied hand over the grass covering his grave.
He should be here. He never even got to turn twenty, never got to have kids or the family he wanted, hell, he was just a kid himself when he died. Just a fucking kid.
“That…that can’t be right,” you stammer. “There’s no way.”
“I’m sorry,” Satoru places a hand on your back, tears slowly rolling down his cheeks. “I - fuck - I couldn’t save him. I was too late.”
“No, no, no, no,” you begin to spiral, gaze rapidly shifting over the ground as you process his words.
Suguru was dead. Killed by a man named Toji Fushiguro, trying to protect the Star Plasma Vessel, the one who was supposed to assimilate with Master Tengen.
“I don’t…I don’t know what happened,” Satoru chokes out, “But…I saw his body. He’s gone.”
A scream echoes down the corridor - was it yours? Everything feels far away as Gojo wraps his arms around you, sobs racking your body as you cry into one another.
Shaking your head, you wipe the tears that have begun to fall as you remember the day you lost him. Despite the years that have passed, you remember it like it was yesterday, the way the setting sun covered you and Satoru as the night air came in, unable to move from that spot as you wept together.
The sickest fucking part was that it didn’t even matter.
When Riko Amanai, the Vessel, was found dead, they just got a replacement, another body to stand in for Master Tengen’s needs. They told Suguru to protect her with his life and he did, but ultimately the loss of hers was inconsequential to the upkeep of Jujutsu society; just as one flower died they plucked another.
But they couldn’t regrow Suguru’s soul.
Four men.
That’s how many it took to carry his body from the basement of Jujutsu High. You watched in silence as they passed you, unspeaking, unwavering, unbothered as they bore his weight.
It feels wrong, somehow, like he should be heavier. He always had this gravitational pull, this universe-sized soul that drew everything to him - shouldn’t they be able to feel that?
How heavy is a body? How heavy is the grief it carries?
“Hey,” a voice pulls you back to the present, the sun beginning to hang low in the sky as you ground yourself, idly tugging at the dirt beneath you. “I’m glad to see you,” Satoru greets warmly as he walks across the graveyard towards you.
Since the last time you saw him he’s aged, the creases around his eyes deeper than a twenty-year-old’s should be, an air of sadness clinging to him like wet clothes after being caught in the rain.
“You too,” you smile as he sits next to you in the damp grass.
Neither of you explicitly make plans to see each other here every year, yet you both tacitly know you wouldn’t miss this, the annual reconvening one you simultaneously cherish and dread. Suguru deserves to be celebrated, but it’s also a reminder of the time he didn’t get, the birthdays cut short when his life was stolen from him.
The two of you sit in silence for a while, content without speaking as a cool breeze picks up, dusk settling in.
“He should be here,” Satoru mutters, his knees tucked up to his chest.
“I know,” you murmur as you lay on your back, gaze unfocused on the darkening sky above you.
Another momentary pause falls between you.
“Did you love him?” he asks.
“Yeah,” you answer truthfully. “Did you?”
“Yeah.”
You let out a shaky breath. “Satoru?”
“Mhm?”
“Do you think that was enough, that we loved him?”
He tilts his head to look down at the grave that separates you, the lilacs you brought now lightly covered in a layer of dew. Sighing, he brushes away the tears that had been forming along his lash line. “I hope so.”
“I hope so, too.”
He reaches an arm out to you, holding your hand in his as you both place your empty palms onto the dirt.
“Happy birthday, Suguru,” you whisper.
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bearw-me · 3 days
Note
This is kinda dark so if you don't wanna do it it's cool. Can I request Carmilla running into a son reader? [Years before she had her daughters she had a son but she was too strict/serious on her boy which led to him...taking his own life. The experience made Carmilla realize she mightve been too hard on him so when hid sisters come around she showers them with love] The reader thinks carmilla is going to scold him, scream at him or anything but she just hugs him hard and tells him she's sorry and that she loves him
i'd like to put my author's note up here before you guys read what i wrote/make a little disclaimer!
TW: mentions of harm
I wouldn't write the act, per-se, but i had absolutely no problem with your request because it doesn't really involve those details (fic wise) this one is mostly about comfort and a nice reunion!
just before you go, know your best-friend mal is always here for you <3 this and every other fic i write is my silent love-letter to you
𝐍𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐋𝐞𝐭 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐆𝐨 — 𝐂𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐚 𝐂𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐞
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𐐒 includes : carmilla carmine x son!reader, odette, clara 𐐒 cw : angst, hugs, kisses, comfort 𐐒 summary : after a few decades in hell, you decide it's time to stop putting it aside and visit your mother for the first time since you've appeared in hell. as anxious as you are, she receives your visit with open arms. 𐐒 word count : 1.1 k
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The metal body of the cab rattled against the broken highway, the sights of Pentagon city flashing past you in a pink florescent blur. You sighed, slumping into the leather seats.
Were you really doing this?
The thought made your stomach bubble with new found nerves. Rolling and wrenching the muscles in your stomach so hard you suddenly had to lean forward in your seat. Forced to stare at all the dust and garbage littered about the floor.
"Oh god I'm gonna be sick," you mumbled to yourself.
"Don't throw up in my car kid," the driver growled at you, suddenly adjusting his rearview mirror so that he could keep an eye on you.
You tried not to roll your eyes, taking a quick glance out of the window just in time to witness the change in districts.
"Might wanna keep your head down kid! We're in Carmine's district now," he laughed, a hoarse sound filled with cigarette smoke.
You had never actually been in this part of hell. After all these years you've been here, watching as the districts had shifted between hands in the great soul exchange. . .
All those years until you realized she had fallen here just like you.
And you didn't really know how to process that thought just yet.
The once chaotic district was now more silent.
Shadows skulking between buildings and alleyways, making deals to sell weapons and bartering for money.
You grimaced, opting to let those images blur in your mind and let your head fall against the rattling window.
What possessed you to see your mother after all these year? Who knows. . .
It just felt like it had to be done.
Soon, the tall white building had come into view, a place you heard the overlords of hell met up.
And today, Carmilla would be here, same with your-. . .
Odette and Clara.
You stepped out of the cab, soles hitting the pavement with a tap. You paid what you owed to the driver and waved a quick thanks as he sped off, the devil on his heels.
That left you alone, standing like David against Goliath with the empire she had built.
She's. . . kept herself busy.
It's all you could think about. Staring at the gleaming tiles of the building with hesitance.
What would she say to you? Should you have told her you were coming? That you were here?
The sickness that seemed to be plaguing you had come back in waves.
The last time you had remembered seeing her, you were both alive on Earth, screaming at each others faces.
"One day, mi hijo, you will have to do everything for yourself! You will have to take over the business! YOU have to carry all that burdens us and I NEED you to be ready for that! Why can't you just see that! I won't always be here for you! YOU NEED TO STEP UP TO THIS!"
But. . .
You just couldn't do everything she had wanted of you. The standards, the rules, the burden. . . it was all too heavy for one person to carry.
And now here you were, on the white-waiting room couch unannounced.
To sayy. . . what exactly?
You bit at your nails in thought, leg bouncing up and down as you waited for your name to be called.
It was pretty empty today.
No one was really sitting in here with you.
That was a great thought.
A deep, strung-out exhale shook its way out of your lungs.
Nerves, you figured.
You didn't even know what to do with your hands, running them through your hair and rocking back and forth in your seat, wondering if it was too late to just stand up and leave-
"Um. . ." You stopped completely, turning your head towards the sound of your voice.
Just before the office doors, two small sinners stood side by side, holding a clipboard up to their faces as they eyed you with surprise.
Odette and Clara.
There was no mistaking them.
"That's. . . me?" You rose from your seat like a ghost, not really feeling anything but utter surprise.
It was the first time you've ever seen them. The same cream colored hair, the same eyes, they even stood en pointe like her.
Odette and Clara.
"Come with us," Clara beckoned, her curly hair and grey skin. . . did she look like that too? Now that she was a sinner?
Thank goodness the girls turned away from you quickly, giving you just enough time to wipe a stray tear from your eye. Estranged siblings that you've never even met. . . and you were so full of emotion at just the sight of them.
Did they know who you were?
You watched them wearily, the two exchanging quick glances at each other and occasionally, at you.
"She's right in here," Clara trailed off.
Odette glanced at you through her round glasses, a hint of worry lifting her eyebrows up "She wasn't expecting you today."
"Alright," you shrugged. I mean, it was a fact you already knew, but to hear the two of them say it to you was the final slap of reality you weren't sure you entirely needed.
The two of them opened the doors for you, watching intently as you shuffled into the room, and back at each other incredulously.
"Ay dios mio, I said I didn't have time for meetings. . ." you heard her mumble, face covered by a laptop screen, hunched over and lost in her work.
It was how you remembered her.
"Mamá," you called out, finally taking a seat in front of her desk, unsure of who or what you'd find on the other side of that screen.
With that one word, she froze still, a pair of demonic red eyes peering over the top of that silver screen.
"Mamá," you said again, a choked sound now that you realized it was her.
It was actually her.
A sinner, your mother, an overlord, who was finally before you.
It was like all the things you had planned on telling her had thrown themselves together and crumbled beneath the sight of her.
"Mi hijo."
"Mamá, I know you're mad at me," the tears came without warning, and you shuffled uncomfortably in your seat, unable to keep looking at her as the sobs wracked through your body, pleading for her forgiveness "I tried my best! I tried! I-"
"Mi hijo, I'm so sorry," your mother flew into your arms, the familiarity of her love so striking that you became undone in her arms.
She cried into your neck, a sound you've never heard before "Oh mi hijo, no heavens could ever keep me away from you, never, and I and never letting you go again,"
"I love you mi hijo."
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143-iloveu · 16 hours
Text
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Credit goes to the owner, @slave_girl_1004 I do not own this photo!
MDNI - Not all of my works are NSFW, but I do not want minors interacting with my blog just to be safe. All NSFW content will carry a Mature Community Label. Ageless and empty blogs will promptly be blocked.
Eternity
Idol!Chan X Idol!Reader
Tooth-rotting Fluff
Content Warnings - Teeny tiny make-out session, Chan calls reader princess (otherwise GN!Reader), reader stares at Chan's shirtless torso (can you blame them?)
Word Count - 2,040
Synopsis: You never imagined going on tour with your boyfriend and his bandmates would lead to this. Although, you wouldn't change it for the world.
A/N: This will be part of an 'Idol X Idol AU' series. Once I post the next part, I will create a master list with each part in the order they should be read. You can absolutely read this as a stand-alone though.
©️ Please don't repost or translate my works on other platforms.
Your recent collaboration with Stray Kids dropped nearly six months after you and their leader, Bang Chan (Chris to you), officially announced you were in a relationship. Chris had originally written the song as his gift to you for your fourth anniversary. He wanted to write a song that would help you feel closer to each other whenever the two of you are touring opposite sides of the globe. That same night, the two of you (and JYPE) released statements confirming your relationship. After four years together, you both felt that it was time to tell the world.
Chris begged you incessantly for weeks to sing it as a duet with him. He desperately wanted to hear your beautiful voice singing his lyrics.
“Hearing you bring the song to life could get me through my darkest days! Besides, only you and I will ever hear it.”
He didn’t realize it then, but that was a lie. Well… not a lie, exactly. He just changed his mind once he finished mixing it. When he let you hear the final cut, you knew immediately that you had to share this masterpiece with the world. You couldn’t even try to convince yourself to be so selfish.
“This should be on the next album!” you both said simultaneously.
“Only if you will sing it with me, though,” he adds, “No one else’s voice is acceptable!”
Fast forward six months, and your duet with Chris is the most popular song on the new Stray Kids album. Fans are giving rave reviews. Some are even saying that they love how much you and Chris love each other, labeling your relationship as ‘#GOALS.’ JYPE took notice, begging you to join Stray Kids on their next tour. They offered you the opportunity to ‘open’ for them in the way many Western artists do, performing some of your songs before the boys took the stage each night. In return, you were asked to perform your duet with him near the end of each show.
Tonight, you and the boys are performing in Sydney for the second night in a row. They gave the boys a few days off before the shows to visit with his and Felix’s families, but they still came to tonight’s show to support them. The pressure you put on yourself for this performance is nearly crushing. You get along with his family very well, but something about knowing they will be watching you perform with their son causes your anxiety to spike.
“Five minutes, Y/N!” the stage manager shouts.
You are nothing more than a pacing ball of nerves at this point. You’ve never been so nervous for a concert… not even in your early debut days.
“Two minutes!”
Just as they shout the warning, all eight men come running down from the stage. Chris quickly scans the room, searching for you. He smiles when his eyes land on you. You meet his gaze just before he’s yanking his shirt over his head, changing into the last outfit of the show. You can’t resist the urge to admire your boyfriend’s toned torso, the way his muscles contract with every movement momentarily relieves your anxieties. Mere seconds later, he’s pulling another shirt on and adjusting his mic, snapping you back to reality.
“You ready, princess?” he calls as he motions for you to join him.
You nod and step onto the rising platform. Chris is quick to intertwine his fingers with yours, squeezing lightly. Your worries melt away as he holds your gaze.
“I love you,” he says as the stage manager yells a ten-second warning.
“I love you, too.”
The platform rises, and the stage lights flood your vision. The crowd cheers as your silhouettes come into view, and the music begins to play as the two of you step into the spotlight. You look over to Chris, trying to keep your anxiety in check. He looks breathtaking under these lights. His beauty captivates you, just as it has for the entirety of this tour (and your relationship), drawing a smile on your face.
As Chris begins singing, you feel goosebumps rising on your skin. No matter how many times you hear or perform this song, it will always affect you. There is so much emotion in his voice. He’s looking at the crowd far less than usual, keeping his eyes fixed on you. It’s as if the whole world is standing still around you.
As you finish the song, he finally addresses the crowd.
“What did everyone think of the show tonight? Did you have a good time?”
Everyone cheers.
“You guys were absolutely amazing! The energy was intense!”
“I agree, Chan. They were phenomenal!” you chime in.
“Stay, what did you think of Y/S/N’s performance?”
The crowd erupts in cheers yet again. Stays have been so accepting of you and your relationship with their Bang Chan. Sure, some people didn’t take the news well, but most Stays have welcomed you with open arms.
“Me too, me too…” he begins, “It has been such a blessing and honor to share our stage with her. Thank you all for welcoming her so positively. It warms my heart to see your love for her.”
“Yes, thank you, Stay. Your love and support mean the world to me. I had so much fun with you all tonight. Good-”
“Actually, before we say goodnight…” Chris interrupts, cheeks red as a tomato, “I have one more thing I want to say.”
The crowd cheers for a moment before he gently asks them to quiet down.
“Y/F/N…”
Your eyes go wide. He never uses your real name on stage, not a single slip-up. He’s a professional through and through.
“The last four and a half years with you have been a dream. No one has ever understood or accepted me the way that you do. Having my members and Stay made my heart feel full, but then you came into my life, making it feel so full that it may burst.”
“Channie…”
He steps closer to you as he continues.
“Christ, I’m rambling… Sorry, I’m nervous,” he says with a shy giggle, mostly to the crowd.
You catch the other members making their way back onto the stage. They are grouped, standing at the rear of center stage. The crowd cheers until they each make a shushing gesture.
Once the crowd quiets again, he continues.
“What I am trying to say is that you are the most amazing and important person in my life. You are my best friend, my rock, and my home. You make me happier than I ever thought possible. You are irreplaceable, and I want to spend eternity with you. So, in front of my family, my members, and Stay…”
He bends down on his left knee, holding your hands in his. Felix jogs over, handing him a small blue box. When that box comes into view, your heart begins to race. Is this man proposing to you in front of all these people? He sure knows how to make a grand gesture!
The entire stadium erupts into a chorus of gasps before he holds the mic up to his lips again.
“Y/F/N, will you marry me?”
Your tears are flowing freely before he’s even finished his speech. He opens the box, revealing a stunning ring. It’s a modest princess-plus cut diamond nestled between two opals (his birthstone) and two of your birthstones. It’s beautiful! You are sobbing at this point. He clearly understands that you prefer to leave the flashy jewelry for the stage.
The crowd is screaming now, the floor vibrating from the intensity.
“Say yes, say yes!” they chant.
The boys are shushing them. The crowd takes a moment to respond, eventually quieting to just above a murmur.
You nod your head a few times. Suddenly, Seungmin’s voice comes over the speakers.
“What was that, Y/N?”
You lift your microphone, your hand shaking like a leaf.
“Yes,” your voice trembles, “of course I’ll marry you!”
His eyes light up before his toothy grin smushes them into the cutest little half-moons. Once he slides the ring onto your finger, he jumps to his feet and pulls you into a hug, spinning you around in excitement. You laugh at his cute antics. He places you back on the floor before pressing his lips to yours, kissing you deeply in front of 20,000+ people. Your heart is beating erratically, and you’re overjoyed. The boys are each screaming their congratulations and well wishes into their mics, clearly happy for their leader-hyung.
You were the first to pull away. If you hadn’t broken the kiss, there is a good chance that Chris would have stood there kissing you all night.
“I love you, Y/N.”
“I love you, Christopher.”
The crowd is going wild. They’ve been screaming for nearly a full minute. The boys let them have a moment before attempting to reign in the energy. Once the crowd settles enough for the boys to be heard, the intro to #LoveSTAY begins playing. You know this is their encore, so you make your way off the stage.
You flop onto the couch in the group dressing area. Your body feels as if it is vibrating with excitement. You stare down at your left hand, the ring on your finger making your heart race all over again. You’ve known that you wanted to marry Chris since before your first anniversary, but you never imagined that he’d propose like this.
After the boys finish their performance, he comes to find you. When he catches sight of you smiling down at the ring on your finger, he feels an immense wave of pride wash over him. He’s the one who made you smile like that, and he is beyond thankful that he’s the one who gets to bring you so much happiness.
He walks up behind you, leaning down to press a kiss to your cheek.
“I can’t wait to wake up to that smile every single morning.”
“Channie!” you squeal happily.
You climb over the back of the couch, nearly jumping into his arms. He smooths your hair before kissing you passionately. You will never tire of the feeling of his soft lips pressed to yours, always leaving you breathless. He places one strong hand at the nape of your neck and the other on your waist, sending shivers down your spine. A moment later, he pokes his tongue out, silently asking for entry. You grant it, tongues in a slow battle for dominance. He easily takes control just as the rest of Stray Kids enter the room.
“Ew!” Hyunjin jokes.
Chris’ hand leaves your neck, raising a middle finger in the general direction of his grown-ass ‘children.’ You pull away before the boys can make any more comments. The pout your now fiancé wears is almost cute enough to draw you back in.
“While I am happy to sleep in my bed finally, I’m sad that the tour is over.” Jeongin sighs.
All of them nod in agreement.
“I had so much fun with you these last few months, Y/N.”
“Me too, Channie. I had a blast with all of you!”
“I never want to go on another tour without you,” he smiles as he pulls you into a hug.
The others groan in mock disgust at his affection toward you. They always act as if your public displays gross them out, but you know they are just being dramatic.
“Get in here, you dorks!” you shout as you wave them over.
You only have to ask once before all seven of them are bounding across the room. They shout happily before they squish you and Chris into the center of a giant, bouncy group hug. Your chest is pressed firmly against his, and he smiles apologetically. The boys have you two trapped in a too-tight embrace, but neither you nor Chris would want it any other way. Wrapped in the muscular arms of all eight members of Stray Kids, you know that you will never be lonely again.
“I love you boys so much!”
“We love you too!” they shout in unison.
A/N: Thank you, Elly, for prompting me to write a mushy Chan proposal with idol!Chan and idol!reader. Without your input, this fic wouldn't exist. Soft, mushy Chan deserves more recognition, and I'm here to ensure he gets it! I hope you love this as much as I do!
And thank you, Elly, for being my number one hype-woman! You are the only reason I was confident enough to start posting in the first place. You mean the world to me! ~Ashe 🦊🐺
©️ Please don't repost or translate my works on other platforms.
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"Run Rabbit, Run!" pt.2 - E.N
Summary: After getting sent to Arkham, Edward requests to see Y/n Wayne. The visit is not what y/n expected at all...(this might not be entirely consistent with the first part, but just ignore those parts pls. I have exams soon so I'm balancing writing and college and running on like 5 hours of sleep each day 😭 I'm still rlly proud of this tho <3 I hope u like it)
Pt.1 here pt.3 here
Content Warning: 18+, explicit language, AFAB!Reader, she/her pronouns, egotistical!Edward, stalker!Edward, yandere!Edward, brief mention of suicide, mentions of rough sex, EXTREMELY graphic descriptions of sexual intercourse, sexual content, dirty talk, daddy issues, daddy kink, praising, degrading, choking, slapping, edward referring to himself as a fox and y/n a rabbit, mentions of blood, mentions of murder, mentions of guns, mentions of torture. (Edward is a freak in this. This is kinda like joker/harley dynamic except there is no abuse, it's just that Edward is so fucking charming that y/n is OBSESSED with him.)
Word Count: 7k+
Songs For Inspo:
YOU'RE TOO SLOW (Bonus) - Odetari
Freak Show - Punkinloveee, h3artcrush
I LOVE YOU HOE (W/ 9lives) -Odetari
She' So Nice - Pink Guy
Custer - Slipknot
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~Read Below Cut~
Y/n sat on her bed, head in her hands as she wept. Bruce put a hand on her back, rubbing comforting circles. It was a huge blow to her gut. She had fallen in love with Edward over the months they had been friends. The two of them had gotten so close. And now, she had found out that he was The Riddler. The real humiliating part? It was right under her nose. Though she had suspicions, she never wanted to believe them, so she ignored every red flag she saw.
"I'm really sorry." Bruce said.
"Bruce, is it bad that I still care about him?" She asked, tears forming in her eyes.
He sighed.
"No, I don't think so. He was your friend."
She nodded, wiping away the tears that spilled down her cheeks. Bruce frowned, pulling her in for a hug. After the whole incident happened, Bruce immediately went to y/n's apartment, outside of his armor of course. He knew she lived nearby and he wanted to make sure his sister was ok. Y/n had told him about the man she met in a bookstore, and from what she had shared with him, he was a good person. But, he should know better than anyone how easily one can hide their true self.
"I'm surprised he didn't try and hurt you. You're a Wayne and it seems like he has a grudge against our family."
"He has every right to hold a grudge against us!"
Bruce pulled away from the hug, confusion on his face. Y/n sighed, standing up and going to her nightstand. She opened it up and pulled out a file. Tossing it to Bruce, she crossed her arms over her chest. Inside was pictures of the old orphanage that was once Wayne Manor. Pictures of the living conditions, children, and even Edward were in there. Y/n had done some serious digging to get this information, though, it was easy if you were a Wayne of course.
"He lived in the orphanage, Bruce. His entire life. Our dad offered him a better life, told him that he could work for W.I."
"He did?" He asked, looking through the pictures.
"Yes, he did. Edward, he applied so many times to the Renewal project. But...dad and mom..." She trailed.
Bruce looked up at her, feeling his heart sink.
"...well, you and I were too young to take charge of anything. So, he was left to rot in that prison. He told me about the things he experienced there, Bruce. It haunts me that Wayne Enterprises let children suffer. We could have easily helped those poor children." She sniffled, holding back tears.
"Jesus."
"You think we're sad orphans, Bruce? Look at those pictures. Look at how they lived..."
He did. He saw all of it. The rats. The horrible beds that they had to sleep in, if they even could. Bruce felt cold just looking at the pictures. He winced as he saw one picture of a child, bite marks on their hands and fingers.
"When I was older, I found out about this. That's why I live out here, Bruce. I want to live like everyone else does. I donate to the orphanages, I do check ups to make sure everything is good, I donate to hospitals, I do volunteering. But, it was Edward who showed me how truly terrible this city is. Yes, he murdered people...but they were bad people Bruce. You know this. That's why he didn't go after me..."
"It sounds like you're defending his actions..." He raised an eyebrow.
"I'm not! I'm just...he's not a bad person, Bruce. Sick in the head, sure. I'm just worried about him..." She mumbled.
"Y/n, he murdered people."
"And you go around beating people up in a bat costume! Maybe you belong in Arkham too." She spat.
"I don't kill people."
"Well, maybe if you did this city would be safer!"
"What the fuck are you talking about?"
"I-..I don't know. I'm sorry. I'm just shaken up. Frankly, I could give a shit about the people he killed, they were all scum. I'm just worried about Edward."
"Well, he's in Arkham, he's safe there. He can't hurt anyone and he can't hurt himself."
"I guess...not the most humane place though."
Y/n's phone rang, making both of them fall silent. Who could be calling this late at night? It had been an hour since Edward was apprehended, making it 1 A.M. She looked at Bruce before answering the phone.
"This is Y/n Wayne, who is this?"
'Ms. Wayne, this is Cap-...Commissioner Gordon.'
"Commissioner Gordon! Um, what's the matter?"
Bruce raised an eyebrow.
'It's 'The Riddler'. He's asked to see you in Arkham.'
"Oh, um...ok, I'll be there."
Y/n hung up the phone.
"It's Edward. He's requested to see me..."
"And you're going?" He asked.
"Well, of course I am. I need an explanation, some closure. He's still my friend, Bruce."
He sighed.
"I'm surprised he hasn't asked to see me. He seemed so obsessed with gaining my attention. Um, you're not going to tell him that I'm..."
"No, Bruce. I'm not an idiot. Can you drive me to Arkham, please? It'd be nice to have you there."
"Yeah, that's ok..."
~
When the Wayne siblings arrived, everyone practically worshipped them. Offering to open doors, constantly saying 'Ms. Wayne' and 'Mr. Wayne'. It annoyed the both of them a lot, though Bruce was the one who could hide the annoyance. Y/n, however, could not. Yes, she loved her family, but she didn't want to be seen as simply 'the Wayne daughter'. It put her on a high pedestal that she hated being on.
"Fuck, there he is." She mumbled, looking at him through the one way window.
"Are you sure you want to do this?"
"Yes. Um, I know there is camera in the room, but do they pick up audio too? I'd prefer for our conversation to be private."
Bruce looked at the security officer.
"Oh, um, no ma'am they do not pick up sound. They only serve as surveillance to make sure an inmate doesn't try and do something they shouldn't. Sometimes we hold therapy sessions in here too, so, legally we can't record sound."
"Ok, thank you. Alright, I'm going in."
"I love you, little sis."
"I love you too, big brother."
Y/n took a deep breath as she opened the door. Edward's gaze landed on her immediately, causing her to feel small. Yes, y/n had always been slightly intimidated by Edward, but even more so now. He did not look like a person who was capable of violence, and yet he murdered multiple people. It was startling. Swallowing a lump in her throat, she sat down in the chair on the other side of the glass.
"Mmm, I knew you'd come..." He hummed.
"You're still my friend, Edward. I care about you."
He chuckled, deciding he'd circle back to that topic later. Tilting his head to the side, he raised his hands up slowly so the guard didn't get jumpy. Edward pointed at the thing in their hands.
"What's that?" He asked.
Y/n opened up the slot underneath the glass. She slid the item into the box, closing the lid. It fell to Edward's side, and he picked it up. A small smile formed on his lips. It was y/n's copy of 'A Midsummer Night's Dream'. Y/n watched as he flipped through the pages, immediately feeling himself grow warm with happiness.
"I was going to bring you a blanket, but they said that it was a safety hazard. They said you could hang yourself with it." She grumbled.
"Well, this is still a nice present."
It fell silent in the visiting room. The only sound was the flipping of the pages as Edward skimmed through the book. He looked so nonchalant, as if he didn't just snipe Falcone less than 2 hours ago. Though, to be fair, his death wasn't that distressing. Y/n was just startled by how calm he was, especially with where he was.
"Edward, why did you call me here?"
"Hm, I'm not entirely sure...I suppose I just wanted to see my 'friend' again." He smiled innocently.
Y/n huffed, crossing her arms over her chest. Edward smirked, humming to himself like he usually did. His fingers rapped against the book, creating small tap sounds. Eventually, y/n just rolled her eyes.
"Look, if you aren't going to talk to me then I'll just go."
"Oh, you will? Ok then, go ahead."
Y/n looked at him, cheeks tinted slightly pink. He had that smug grin on his face, y/n had seen it a lot. Edward had that look when he won a game they were playing or if he stumped y/n on a riddle. But, this time it was more sinister. It sent chills down her spine and she stayed put in the chair. Edward chuckled, nodding his head slowly. He didn't have to say anything, they both knew he called her out on her bluff. Sighing, he looked at her with kind eyes, but his tone of voice was the complete opposite. He was so good at pretending to be something he was not.
"Y/n Wayne, you knew who I was for a while. Why didn't you say anything?" He questioned.
"I-I don't know what you're talking about, Edward."
"Hm, so you never saw the mask in my pocket that one night? You never saw the tiny dots of blood on my face ? The riddles never raised a red flag?" He asked, continuing to flip through the book.
Y/n was silent, looking down at her hands shamefully. Edward tutted, shaking his head. Coolly, he read a small part of the page he was on before looking back up at y/n. She nodded, admitting that she saw them all.
"Uh huh, so why didn't you say anything? I'm dying to know the answer..."
"I-It was because you were my...friend, Edward. I was conflicted."
He kept his face neutral as he looked at her.
"Mmm, there's that word again. Friend. I know you're lying about your answer, so I'll make a deal with you. I'll tell you a secret I've been keeping for a while, and you in return will give me an honest answer. Sound fair?" He asked.
Before she could answer, he started to talk again.
"I've been stalking you for months, y/n. Long before I 'met' you in that bookstore. Did you know that?" He giggled.
"What?"
"Did you really think I just happened to show up in your favorite bookstore? That I just happened to live directly across from you? I know everything about you, y/n. I've been watching you. Studying you. Like a predator stalks their prey."
"You're fucking with me, Edward. That's not funny." She scolded.
"Oh, I don't think it's funny either. I'm being very serious, y/n. Now, why don't you tell me the truth about why you never ratted me out?"
"What the fuck..." She mumbled.
"Well? I'm waiting for an answer."
She was taken aback by his secret, but it made sense the more she thought about it. Of course he had stalked her. She was just too fucking stupid to see it. The thought of Edward stalking her for months before they met scared the shit out of her. But, at the same time, it excited her.
"Y-You're a creep! I trusted you! I lov-..." She trailed.
"Aha, there's the answer I was looking for! Go on, say it." He cackled.
She sighed, looking at her hands again.
"I loved you, Edward. That's why I never said anything."
"Loved? Oh no, you still love me y/n. I know you do. Otherwise, you wouldn't be here."
"I do not love you! You're a psycho, a creep, and a murderer!" She spat.
"You knew all of those things before, yet you still were 'friends' with me. Isn't that right?" Edward smirked.
"W-"
"And don't act like you hate the idea of me stalking you. I know who you are, y/n. You're so easy to read."
"I-I don't know what you're talking about..."
Edward sighed in annoyance, propping his forearms up on the metal ledge. He maintained his neutral facial expression as he looked at her. Y/n felt small under his gaze and he knew it. He knew he had power over her. He always would.
"Tell me, doesn't the thought of me watching you from my apartment excite you? Waiting all night for even the tiniest glimpse of you? I know how much you crave attention from others." Edward suavely said.
"I-I mean..."
"Oh, precious Y/n never got the attention she so desperately wanted growing up. No mommy and daddy to tell her 'I'm so proud of you, sweet girl!'. Isn't that right, rabbit?" He cooed.
Y/n felt a chill go down her spine. He was right. Fuck, he was good at reading people. Sniffling, y/n nodded her head. How the hell was he doing this to her?
"Oh, the poor thing. You have such a kind heart, always giving and giving and giving. When has anyone ever given you anything in return? When was the last time someone praised you?" He asked.
Y/n reached up, wiping a tear from her eye quickly.
"S-So long..."
"That just won't do, will it? No, I don't think it will."
She looked at him, lips quivering.
"You know who is proud of you? Eddie."
He watched as she smiled softly. Edward loved seeing her smile so much. If he could just capture a picture of it and keep it, he was sure he would never feel sadness ever again.
"Y-You are?" She sniffled.
"Of course I am, sweetheart. You make me so proud. There are so many things you're good at that deserve praise. Your art, your constant donations to charity, your kind heart, my oh my the list goes on!" He chuckled.
Y/n was blushing like a school girl. To be completely honest, she didn't care that Edward had stalked her. Sure, it was a little jarring, but he was the first person to show her genuine love in a long time. Y/n was head over heels for him and there was nothing she could do about it. The heart wants what it wants after all.
"Oh, there's that beautiful smile. Such a pretty girl. But, y/n, I do have one thing I'm not proud of at all."
"W-What dad-...Edward?"
He smiled to himself at her near 'slip up'. If she had called him it, he wouldn't have minded at all. Actually, he would have loved it...
"You see, you lie to me a lot. You think I never notice, but I do."
"I-I'm sorry..."
"Do not apologize, y/n. All will be forgiven if you just tell me the truth about one thing."
"O-Ok!"
"That's my girl, now, the 'bad dream' you had earlier. I believe you didn't tell me the full story. Why don't you tell Eddie alllll about it?" He grinned.
"O-Oh...um, I-..." She trailed.
"You can tell me anything, rabbit. I'll keep it as a secret."
Swallowing a lump in her throat, she nodded softly. Edward kept his gaze on her. It was a good thing that the cameras didn't record audio, because he knew what was coming. Yes, he already knew what the dream centered around, but he wanted to hear her say it. He wanted to hear the filthy words leave her mouth.
"W-Well, I was honest about dreaming that you were the Riddler..."
"And you were right! You're so smart." He praised.
Y/n should have felt disgusted at how light hearted he was, but she wasn't. It was upsetting how in love she was with him. She was y/n Wayne and she was in love with The Riddler. But, the shame behind that brought excitement. It was a secret between the two of them, a forbidden love. Just like Romeo & Juliet.
"...but you um, you were frightening. A-And, I um...liked it." She mumbled.
He raised an eyebrow.
"Can you elaborate?"
"I th-thought it was hot...that you um, were making me scared. Um, you were being really um...rough." She stuttered.
Edward felt his dick slowly getting hard. He cursed the glass in his head and the cameras. If he could he'd reach right across and give y/n something to dream about for years to come. Groaning softly, he nodded his head. He wasn't going to be vague anymore. He was going to be blunt.
"Did I fuck you?"
"I-..no. I w-woke up before anything like that happened." She admitted.
"Mmm, so you got all worked up over a dream I didn't even fuck you in? You must have really loved what I was saying and doing in it, huh?" He teased.
"Yeah. I-I did."
"You say we're friends, y/n. But, do friends say they love each other in a romantic way? Do friends have wet dreams about each other?" He asked.
"N-No, they don't..."
"That's right. Mmm, I've had dreams of you too, rabbit. Filthy, filthy, dreams." Edward shivered.
Y/n shifted in her seat, arousal soaking through her panties. Edward could tell she was turned on. She couldn't keep still, thighs subtly rubbing together. He tutted and shook his head.
"Now, now, you better stop that. You don't want to get caught, do you? How embarrassing would that be to have your brother find out that The Riddler was making your pussy wet? I'd be mortified if I were you." He taunted.
She whimpered, ceasing the movement of her legs. Edward could see how much willpower it was taking her not to do it. Amused, he smiled and tilted his head. He was going to torment her, tease her until she was merely a puddle on the chair.
"Ever since I first saw you, I was fascinated. That fascination turned into love. And with most love, comes lust. And oh, my sweet rabbit, I have never wanted someone as badly as I want you."
"R-Really?"
"Believe me when I say that I want to ruin you, y/n."
Y/n whined, resisting the urge to dive her hands down her pants. Edward scoffed, resting his hands back in his lap. He grabbed his dick through his pants, adjusting it.
"I have much more to say, y/n. I suggest you do your best to keep your face neutral. But you can moan, just quietly. I would very much love to hear you moan. I've wondered what it might sound like."
She nodded, gaining her composure as much as she could. Sighing, Edward looked towards the ceiling. It looked as if he was collecting his thoughts. Y/n nearly trembled in anticipation.
"I've had so many dreams of you. Some of them are sweet. Those ones consist of us going on dates, maybe a park or a movie." He said.
"That sounds nice."
"It does, doesn't it?" He smiled.
"But the other ones, ohhh, they are filthy. They are so vulgar that I'm not sure I should let them fall upon your ears." He hummed playfully.
"N-No, I want to hear! Please daddy!" She blurted out, covering her mouth with her hand.
He smiled gently, his dick twitching underneath his pants. A soft groan left his lips. Edward was wishing a painful death the the guard watching their visit. He wished for the cameras to power down and for the glass to disappear.
"You sound just like you do in my dreams. I can't say no to how pathetic that sounded."
Y/n blushed, rubbing her thigh with her hand. It was out of view of the cameras and the window, so Edward allowed it.
"I've had dreams where you're on your knees, begging for me. You always look so desperate and needy every time. It's such a pitiful sight that I can't help but give you what you want. Do you know what you want in those dreams?" He asked flatly.
"W-What, da-" She paused.
"Oh rabbit, you can call me that if you'd like. It sounds so good rolling of your tongue..." Edward smirked.
"Ok, daddy...um, what do I want in your dreams?"
Leaning forward, he got closer to the glass. A cocky, toothy smile plastered over his face. His eyes were bright and happy, as if he was about to tell her a funny joke. Raising up his hands, slowly, he made a very subtle 'jerking' motion.
"To get fucked like a whore, obviously." He laughed.
Y/n whimpered. Her chest was tightening from how aroused she was. She took a deep breath, letting it out through pursed lips. Edward grinned, seeing how worked up he was making her.
"Oh, but you're not a whore. No, far from it. In my dreams I may fuck you like one, but you don't act like one. Once I'm done giving you a good dick down, you get so clingy. You're so dependent on me, never wanting to leave my side. It's so precious. I only hope that you're like that outside of my dreams too." He cooed.
"Y-Yes, I am! I-I'm here, after all. I missed you..."
"Oh, that's so sweet. I shoot and kill Carmine Falcone and the first thing you think of is 'I want Edward! Where's Eddie? I miss him so much!'. Is that right?"
"Well, not exactly."
"Hm?"
"I cried first..."
Edward felt a pang in his chest. It genuinely hurt his heart to hear her say that. He never wanted to make her cry, unless it was from pleasure.
"You poor thing, I never though about how you'd feel. I never wanted to make you cry, I just wanted to get rid of the scum that pollutes Gotham." He frowned.
"I know, I may not agree with the murdering...but I'm not saying I miss Falcone either. It just scared me. I was just worried about what would happen to you..."
"You were worried about me, rabbit? You don't need to do that. I can take care of myself, y/n." He smiled.
She nodded. Edward could tell that she felt sad. He did not want her to be sad, not at all.
"You know I love you, y/n. Right?" He asked.
"Y-Yes, I do."
"I did it all for you. I had different plans for Gotham before. I was going to do something far worse, but you made me change my mind. I just want you to live in a city where you can be safe."
Y/n smiled. It was a messed up way to show he loved and cared for her, but she hadn't been loved before. She didn't care anymore, she just was warmed that he wanted her to be safe. Even if he did it through murdering crooked and corrupt people. She blushed, looking down at her hands.
"No, no, don't hide your face. I want to see it." He asked softly.
She looked back up, faint pink dusted on the tip of her nose and her cheeks. Edward loved that about her so much. He thought it made her look so happy and gentle. He chuckled, clapping his hands together as much as he could with the handcuffs on.
"There she is, the prettiest thing in Gotham." He smiled.
"You're making me blush, Edward..." She mumbled.
"I know and I love it. I love watching you get flustered, it's so precious. If only I could touch you..." He sighed.
"Why do you want to touch me?" She asked.
"Well, I want to hold you and kiss you, y/n. That the first thing I want to do." Edward hummed.
"First? Wh-what are the other things?"
"The things I dream of, rabbit." He grinned.
"Tell me more about the dreams!" Y/n said.
He tutted, wagging his finger back and forth. Eyes were squinted as he disapprovingly frowned. He rested his forearms back on the metal ledge, smiling cockily.
"Now, that sounded like a demand. You aren't telling me to do something without asking nicely, are you?"
"N-No, I'm sorry! P-Please, tell me more Eddie." She corrected herself.
"That sounds much better."
He looked her up and down, sighing happily.
"Tell you more, hm? But there are so many dreams, so many fantasies. Though, one thing stays the same in every single one." Edward stated.
"What is that?" Y/n asked curiously.
He planted his hands on the cold surface, leaning towards the glass. His face turned into a very sadistic and comical expression. Dramatically, he emphasized his words.
"You take my dick like a fucking champ..." He smirked.
Y/n moaned, letting out a breathy sigh. Edward stayed in his close position, not finished with what he was saying.
"I'd fuck you so perfectly that nobody else's dick could even make you feel a fraction as good. But before I'd do that, I'd make sure you're on the brink of tears in desperation. You don't get dicked unless I believe you've earned it. I'd want you on your knees, begging, whimpering, groveling at my feet in hopes that I'll fuck your needy pussy." He chuckled.
Y/n's mouth was slightly agape, startled by how blunt he was. He looked like such a shy person, yet he was a total freak. Again, he was so good at pretending to be someone he was not. Everything he was saying seemed so out of character for him, but in reality, it was his true self. Y/n was just the only one who could bring that side out of him. Edward groaned, pointing at her mouth. He seemed irritated or frustrated, either one really.
"That pretty mouth, it's practically asking me to fuck it. Those lips look so plump and soft. Oh rabbit, open up, let me see your tongue." He asked, on the verge of pleading.
She hesitated slightly, but did as he said. Of course she did. No matter what, she would listen to and do what he said. She was his property, and they both knew it. None of them had to even say it. It was obvious that y/n was Edward's girl. Titles weren't necessary. She was simply his, as much as he was hers. Y/n let her tongue roll out and let Edward look at it for a bit. She did it in a way so that the cameras didn't see, and if they did, it just looked like she was yawning in a way. He covered his mouth with his fingers, doing his best to not jerk off at the brief sight of her tongue.
"Ffffuu...it's a blessing that I can't touch you. Your throat would be raw after I finish with you..." He groaned.
Y/n whined, spreading her legs open subtly. Edward looked down, seeing the obvious damp spot over her pelvic region. His tongue darted out and swiped over his lips. Her eyes were silently screaming 'Please, I want you!' and he loved it. Once again, he cursed the glass between them. He just wanted to devour her, taste her, eat her alive like a fox eats a rabbit. She probably tasted so sweet...
"I wish you could see how you look right now. It's so pitiful. You look like you want to be fucked so bad. Do you want to be fucked?" He groaned.
"Y-Yes, I need it daddy..." She shivered.
"Need? You desperate thing, tell me why you need to get fucked by me."
"B-Because I'm so w-wet...it aches..." Y/n whined.
"Poor rabbit, if he could daddy would bend you over and fuck you against this glass." He said flatly.
Y/n moaned softly, making Edward grip his pants. The sound was nearly enough to make him bust all over the hospital uniform. Not wanting to draw attention, Edward looked at the book again. He pretended to read it.
"You said you dreamt I was rough with you, yet I didn't even fuck you? Well, I can promise you that I'd never hurt you with your permission, I want you to know that. I love you too much to do that to you. I believe that trust and safety is important when doing things like that. So, do you trust me, y/n?" He asked, looking up from the book.
"Y-Yes."
"You believe I'll keep you safe?"
"Yes, I do."
"And you'd tell me if you were uncomfortable, yes?"
"Of course."
Edward looked back down at the book, once again pretending to read it. He was such an actor. It was almost sinful how easily he could hide his lust and vulgarity.
"So, if I shoved your face into your bed with my hand wrapped around your neck, would you like that? Would you like it if I made you choke and gasp for air?" He hummed.
"Fuck...y-yes..."
"Do you want me to pull your hair and skull fuck you until you're crying on my dick? I bet your gags sound so vulgar and erotic." He asked nonchalantly.
"E-Edward, please..."
He held up the book and slumped into the chair. Edward looked like this was the most boring conversation he had ever had in his life. His eyes lazily ran over the words in the book, y/n was half convinced he was actually reading it while he spoke those filthy words to her.
"I bet you'd like to get slapped too. Not too hard, of course. I wouldn't want to bruise that pretty little face. But, firm enough the make sure you don't step out of line. You seem like you love to be put in your place." He yawned.
"E-Edward, I don't know if I can handle this anymore..."
"That's too bad, you wanted to hear all of this, right? Now you need to sit and listen."
"F-Fuck..."
"You're filthy, rabbit. Letting a criminal and a murderer make your pussy wet."
"I-I know."
"That's good that you know. You're self-aware about how dirty you are. You must want dick terribly bad if you've resorted to someone like me."
"N-No, I l-love you!"
"Hmm, that's right. That doesn't make it any better though, rabbit. In fact, it makes it worse. Not only do you want to get dicked down by me, but you love me. For shame."
"B-But..."
"Oh, don't worry sweetheart. I'm not angry with you. I think it's lovely that you feel that way towards me, I feel the same to you. But, we better make sure no one else knows about this. Hm?"
"Mhm!"
Edward placed the book down, looking at y/n.
"Mmm, I wish I could just fuck the soul out of you. I want to make you writhe and squirm. I just know you'd feel so good around my dick."
She moaned a little louder, biting down on her tongue. Edward chuckled, leaning against the metal ledge again.
"You, rabbit, are going to scream my name." He smiled.
"Th-that's big talk f-from someone in A-Arkham." She stuttered.
Edward raised an eyebrow.
"Are you getting smart with me?"
"N-No...I was j-just..."
"No. I know what you were doing and I'm not amused. You don't think I'll find my way out of here? I will. And when I do, I'm coming for you."
Y/n blushed.
"When I get out of here, I'll be sure to rearrange those pathetic guts of yours. I'm all bark and bite."
"You can't even touch me, Edward. It sounds like a bunch of talk to me..." She huffed, getting annoyed with his cocky behavior.
"You want me to break the glass and fuck you right here? I could care less about being watched but I sincerely doubt you want the guards to see you get fucked stupid by me. Don't play with me." He spat.
"I'm n-not trying to play with you, daddy..." Y/n mumbled softly, looking down at her hands.
"Yes you are. You're mocking me and yet you sit before me, wet, pathetic, and needy. Isn't that right, rabbit?"
She nodded.
"You want me to protect you, hold you, love you, yes?" He smirked.
"Y-Yes..."
"My, my, you have terrible daddy issues, don't you? Hm. But, if you want that so bad, then why are you playing with me? Mocking me? Do you think I appreciate that? Do you think it makes me proud?" He scolded.
"No I don't, daddy." Y/n sniffled.
"Mhm, it was so rude of you to talk to me like that. Do you want to hurt daddy's feelings?" He frowned.
He was such a serpent. Oh, but he was so lovely, too. Y/n couldn't help it. It was as if she bit the apple from the tree of good and evil. Except, the serpent held the apple in his mouth after, taunting her as she begged for more. Edward was waving what she wanted in her face, just out of her reach. And he knew it. He was so sick that it was hypnotic. So dangerous yet so kind looking, a wolf in sheep's clothing. Y/n was getting too close to him, but she didn't care if she got bit.
"N-No! I don't want to!" She whined.
"Then what do we say when we hurt someone's feelings?" He hummed, cupping a hand over his ear.
Y/n swallowed a lump in her throat, practically choking on her desire. She placed her hands on the ledge, bottom lip quivering as she looked at Edward. He felt his heart skip a beat as he saw slight tears prick in her eyes. She looked so pretty when she cried, as demented as that sounded. A single tear trickled down her cheek before she wiped it away with her finger.
"M' sorry, daddy..." Y/n sighed.
"Oh, say it again, rabbit." Edward grinned.
She looked at him, blushing heavily. He raised and eyebrow, giving a sleazy smile. Y/n looked at the floor, feeling slightly humiliated. Why? She truly did not know. Maybe it was the way he was talking to her. He was so good at making her feel small.
"I-I'm sorry, daddy." She mumbled.
"An apology has never sounded so sweet..." He hummed.
Y/n figeted with her hands.
"You're just lucky I'm not able to get closer to you, rabbit. You'd be giving me more than just an apology." Edward stated flatly.
She whined, trying to picture what he was hinting at in her head. But, when she did that, she felt herself getting more turned on. That was the last thing she needed.
"I'd give you something too, but I don't know if you'd be able to handle it..." He laughed softly.
Oh, he was so demented. But, it was so hot to her. Y/n should not be so worked up over a murderer talking pure smut to her. Yet, she was. Her core ached and throbbed, pleading for her fingers, Edward's fingers, his dick, mouth, anything. She needed to be touched so bad. It was driving her crazy. She squeezed her thighs together, doing her best not to rub them together.
"That's it, back to being timid. You know you aren't the one in control here, y/n. I may be in chains in this hellhole, but don't think for one second that it makes me weak. I haven't touched you and yet I have you soaking wet, desperate to pleasure yourself while 2 cameras are pointed at you. I have you whimpering, whining, moaning, and begging for something that I can't even give you. Does that sound like someone with no power over you? No hold over you?"
"No, Edward. I-It doesn't."
"Exactly. And you love it."
She nodded and whined.
"I've got you eating out of the palm of my hand, y/n. Just like a rabbit. I wonder, if I give you a carrot, will you jump for me?" He snickered.
"I'm not a pet!" She spat.
"Then why are you so obedient to me? Why are you so dependent on me?" Edward asked, shrugging his shoulders.
"I-..."
He leaned forward, propping his elbows up. Looking at y/n, he spoke in a low tone.
"Admit it, I own you! My name is practically branded on your chest. If only...no, I don't want to scar that pretty skin of yours. But, maybe, I could just mark you...yes. Would you like that? My teeth digging into your neck? I swear I'll try to be gentle, but I'm afraid you might taste too good to be able to restrain myself...I bet your flesh and blood tastes like sugar..."
Y/n was shocked, completely thrown off by his sadistic words. Yes, she was trembling in fear. It was so disturbing to hear him talk about how he wanted to mark her, break the skin on her neck. But, yet again, y/n found herself drawn to him. It was sick, twisted, and vile. And her pussy throbbed.
"I-, b-but it'll hurt..." She whimpered.
"Well, I said I'd do my best to be gentle. All you have to do is tell me to stop! Though I so badly want to...rip you apart...I would never want to make you upset or uncomfortable, sweet rabbit." He smiled sadistically.
Y/n panted, feeling arousal seep onto her inner thighs. She felt so dirty...
"I already know the second you get home, you're going to play with yourself while thinking about me. Thinking about the things I could do to you. Thinking about how I could just..."
Edward banged his fists subtly on the table, maintaining a consistent rhythm. He kept eye contact the whole time, lips curling up into a sickly smile. He was a cocky little shit. He knew exactly what he was doing to her and he thrived in the actions he did. The sound of his fists banging rang in her ears and made her throb. Edward sped up the pace, watching as y/n's eyes closed, no doubt imagining the feeling and how it would look. Abruptly, he stopped, practically edging her in a way.
"...destroy you. Break you. Please you. Torture you." He smirked.
"E-Edward, you're a dick! You're tormenting me!" She cried softly.
"Yes I am, took you fucking long enough. I thought you were smart?" He mocked.
She shuddered, his cold gaze freezing her blood.
"It's a game to me, y/n. Yes, I love you, but I love making you crave me too. And you make it so easy..."
A knock on the glass startled y/n, making her turn around. It was most likely Bruce telling her that the visit was going on too long. She sighed, looking back to Edward. Y/n was upset, not wanting to leave, despite how torturous he was being to her. He too looked upset, his plaything was about to leave. His plaything. His. He'd have to make the last minute count. He lured the prey into security, and it was genuine security. But now, it was time for the mind games. It was time for him to strike fear and paranoia into her heart. He wanted to be in her mind for a long time to come.
"You said you loved how I intimidated and scared you in your dream, yes?" He asked.
"Yeah?"
"You'll never know when I get out of Arkham. Not until it hits the newspapers."
Y/n looked at him, unsure of what he was getting at.
"I wonder how long you'll be paranoid? How many times will you watch a dark corner, wondering if I'll walk out of it? How many times will you sleep with one eye open? How many times will you watch behind your back as you walk down the streets? I am still a criminal, after all." He smirked devilishly.
Y/n's eyes widened, feeling her skin turn to ice. It was then that she realized he truly was sick. But, why did she still love him? Oh, how conflicting a forbidden love must be. To want someone that should not be wanted. To seek approval from someone one should never seek approval from. His pupils looked dilated, staring deep into her soul. She felt exposed and violated just from his gaze. And she loved it...
"Lord, what fools these mortals be!" He shouted.
She shivered, standing up slowly from the chair. Edward picked up the book again, flipping to a certain page. He had memorized the entire book, as he had already read his own copy he bought at the bookstore. But, being Edward, he wanted to be theatric as he read quotes. He looked at y/n in the eyes, standing up abruptly, no doubt startling the guard, Bruce, and y/n herself. He placed his hands against the glass, a breathy laugh leaving his lips.
"I'll follow thee and make a heaven of hell..." He trailed.
Her pussy throbbed once again, thinking back to when they were in the bookstore. She had told Edward that she would never accept anyone's love unless they confessed or expressed it through Shakespeare. And, he was doing exactly that, Although, he was doing it in Edward fashion. Ominous, eerie, and disturbing.
"...to die upon the hand I love so well." She finished.
The door opened up and Bruce came in, grabbing y/n by the hand. Edward laughed hysterically, pacing back and forth behind the glass. His eyes were crazed behind his glasses as he kept his gaze on y/n the entire time. Y/n could tell that he was being dramatic, just wanting to get a rise out of everyone.
"Thus I die. Thus, thus, thus. Now I am dead, now I am fled, my soul is in the sky. Tongue, lose thy light. Moon take thy flight..." He paused, slowly walking back to the glass.
"...Now die, die, die, die!" He cackled.
He watched as Bruce dragged y/n out of the room. She looked back at him, still worked up from their 'discussion'. Edward blew a kiss to her, further making the scene more demented. Y/n attempted to reach up and grab it, but wanted to be discreet, so instead she smiled at him. It was odd though, as she was still terrified of his tangent that he went on. The sight of him laughing and quoting Shakespeare was not something she thought she would ever be scared of, but it was. But before she left, she heard him say one last thing. It sent chills down her spine.
"Run rabbit, run! For I linger in the shadows and you will never know when I might pounce..."
~
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actuallysaiyan · 1 day
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La La Love You(Nanami Kento x Fem!Reader x Haibara Yu)
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warnings: smut, fluff, AU, Haibara and Nanami do not know each other in this fic, Non-Sorcerer AU, College age AU, threesome, unprotected sex, oral sex(fem receiving and male receiving), polycule of sorts, drinking, smoking, recreational drug use, creampie finish, praise kink, degradation kink word count: 3k!!(I cannot write short fics these days I guess) pairings: Nanami Kento x Fem!Reader x Haibara Yu summary: you and Kento meet Yu at the local punk show and hit it off! a little too well... a/n: This is the fic from the poll! I really wanted to write something for these two and I hope you all enjoy! Heavily based on the punk shows I used to go to when I was in my early twenties and the many hangovers I got from going to them. Dividers by the wonderful benkeibear!
TAGLIST: @beneathstarryskies @an-ever-angry-bi @seireiteihellbutterfly. @namikyento @benkeibear
@adharadotcom
@heyitsd1yaa @darkstarlight82
@melisuh123 @galactict3a @erebus-et-eigengrau
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You’re just stepping out of the washroom and heading towards the drink table when someone bumps into you. You gasp as the cold liquid of their beer hits your shirt. The brunette standing in front of you has a look of surprise on his face. He’s immediately apologizing profusely.
“Shit I am so so sorry!” The guy says, a look of guilt written all over his face.
“No, don’t worry about it! It was an accident.”
The guy takes you gently by the hand and leads you back to the bathroom. He grabs a shit ton of paper towel from the broken dispenser and begins trying to clean up the mess on your ripped up Ramones shirt. Your eyes soften at the chivalrous action.
“Thanks, that’s really nice of you.”
The words you speak send him into some sort of shy frenzy. He’s blushing and trying to say it was the least he could do for messing up your shirt. You just shrug and smile, making his heart skip a beat.
“I’m Haibara Yu, by the way.” 
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You shake his hand, “Yu. Nice name!” You introduce yourself.
He finally gets a good look at you. You’ve got piercings and colored hair, and you look like you belong at this venue. Yu, on the other hand, looks quite preppy and cute. But despite his outward appearance, he’s always been a big fan of indie and punk music. So when one of his friends mentioned this basement venue, he figured he’d come check it out.
“You’re not here alone, are you?” Yu asks, smiling brightly.
“I’m here with my boyfriend. I think you should meet him!”
You take his hand, and Yu notices the rings you’re wearing. One of them is in the shape of vampire fangs, the other is a cute black cat, then there’s a gorgeous ruby on a golden band. He figures your boyfriend must have given you that one.
The two of you make your way outside to the smokers. Leaning up against the wall is your boyfriend. His blond hair is partially obscured by his dark hoodie. He has a cigarette dangling from his lips. His black-rimmed eyes dart around until he spots you. A smirk spreads on his face when he notices you with some preppy looking guy.
“Hello there princess,” Kento says and wraps his arm around you. “Who’s this charming man?”
You smirk, “This is my new friend, Yu!” 
Yu blushes and looks away bashfully. He’s never really had an experience like this before. Most of the people who go to shows like this just take one good look at him and they sneer at him. Not everyone at the punk shows are nice, but he thinks you’re so sweet. He wonders how your boyfriend will react.
“Yu Haibara, nice to meet you.” Haibara extends his hand to Nanami.
“Kento Nanami. Pleasure to meet you,”
Nanami takes a drag off the cigarette before he places it between your lips. He doesn’t fail to notice the way Yu seems to be admiring you both. He smirks to himself before he pulls you in even closer.
“You come to see the bands tonight?” Kento asks your new friend.
“Yeah! I’m stoked. I saw the band Blue Thunder last time they were in town.”
Kento chuckles, “Oh man, they are good. I loved their set the last time they were here. You remember that, baby?”
You smile sweetly before handing him back the cigarette, “They played some of the coolest songs. I got their setlist too!”
The three of you continue discussing the bands playing tonight. Kento is very impressed by Yu’s knowledge of the music. When you’re done smoking, Kento holds your hand and guides you back into the basement venue. He looks at Yu and beckons him inside as well.
The three of you get some good spots near where the first band is setting up. Kento goes to get you and Haibara a drink, and when he returns, this is when Yu realizes that he’s being included. He smiles at Kento and they both begin discussing some things. You notice that they actually have a lot in common.
Soon the first band goes on, and all three of you are moshing in the front. A few more people join you all. It’s so much fun this way. Everyone is being rowdy and loud and the band is playing to their heart’s content. Then it’s time for the next band to get on the little stage. It’s the band Yu was talking about, Blue Thunder.
You head over to the drink table to get all three of you drinks. When you return, you notice that your boyfriend and your new friend seem to be speaking in hushed tones. When you inquire about it, they both seem to shrug.
“Nothing, pretty girl. It’s nothing for you to worry about.” Kento presses a kiss to your lips. “Just watch the show, honey.”
You think about it for the rest of the set, but it soon slips your mind as you drink more booze. You’re not exactly drunk, but you’re buzzed. By the time the show is done, you’re ready to head home and order in some take-out. Kento grabs your hand and you two make it to the merch table, picking out some shirts. Yu is sly, giving money to the person at the merch table to pay for the shirts you pick.
“Hey! You didn’t need to do that,” you say, a blush on your cheeks.
“Nope, but I wanted to! You both made me feel so welcome.”
The three of you exit the cramped and sweaty basement to the cold air outside. It sobers you up a little as you shiver. Kento unzips his hoodie and wraps it around you, pulling you closer. You light up a smoke, and you look surprised at Yu. He’s smoking as well, which you could never have guessed.
“That was a good show,” he comments, a plume of smoke surrounding him as he exhales.
Kento nods, “Yeah, it was amazing.”
“I agree. That was a lot of fun.”
Before you know it, both guys are on either side of you. Kento holds your hand, winking at your new friend. Yu grabs your other hand, gently stroking it with his thumb. You aren’t sure what’s going on now, but you aren’t complaining. You decide to roll with it, seeing as you’re feeling really good right now. 
The three of you walk towards the apartment you share with Kento. Kento unlocks the door when you get there and he invites Yu inside with a wink. You know that something has been said between them without your knowledge, though you can’t imagine what it was. 
Inside the apartment, Yu gets a better sense of who you two are. You’re clearly anime fans, but also you two love to listen to music. In the living room is a dilapidated couch where you settle, and in the corner next to the TV stand with the many gaming consoles, is a state of the art record player. Kento goes over and picks out one of your favorite albums to put on as background music. Then Yu comes to sit with you on the couch.
“Does anyone want leftovers? We ordered pizza last night. I was going to pop them in the toaster oven.” Kento suggests.
You nod, “Yes please.”
Yu smiles. “Yeah I’m game.”
After a few minutes, the three of you are munching on the refreshed leftovers. Yu begins to talk more about himself, and you realize how much of a sunny guy he is. He’s just so sweet. You linger on every word he says. His smile is so infectious. 
Soon there’s a joint being passed around. You begin to feel cuddly and affectionate. You crawl onto Kento’s lap, nuzzling your face in the crook of his neck. Yu feels something stirring deep inside of him as he watches you two become so touchy-feely. It’s making him feel things he’s never quite felt before.
“She’s so cute, huh?” Kento asks, watching the way Yu is reacting to all of this.
“She really is,” Yu spills out, his cheeks burning at his admission.
Kento presses a kiss to your neck, his hands gently rubbing your shoulders. Then he allows his hands to trail downward, getting close to your breasts. But before he takes them into his hands, he reaches behind you and unclasps your bra. You let out a sigh of relief.
You and Kento look at each other for a few minutes, then he cups your face. With a look towards Yu, Kento presses his lips against yours. You moan as Kento deepens the kiss, pulling you even closer to him. As much as Yu wants to look away, he just can’t seem to bring himself to do so. The sight of you and Kento kissing is quite arousing.
When you pull away to breathe, both men are noticing just how much sensuality is in the air. Your lips are red and swollen just from the small amount of kissing you’ve been doing, but already you look like you’re ready for more.
“How about you kiss her?” Kento suggests.
You’re being shoved onto Yu’s lap very shortly, and you smile shyly as he looks at you with those big expressive eyes. He’s different from your Kento, but he ignites something within you. His big hand cups your cheek, pulling you into him. The minute your lips touch, you know you’re never going to want to let him go.
You two continue to kiss, and you feel his tongue hesitating to glide against your bottom lip. You part your lips ever so slightly, and you hear him moan as your own tongue slips into his mouth. His hands grip onto you a little tighter, pulling you to straddle him. He’s getting a little greedy with all of this.
“Hmph, looks like I don’t need to teach you how to kiss her.”
You and Yu break apart, looking over at Kento. He’s smirking at you both, his belt unbuckled. He’s teasingly playing with the bulge in his pants, winking at you.
“How about it, princess? You want us to fuck you?” Kento asks you as pulls you back onto his lap.
“Mmmm…yes, please.”
Yu’s eyes widened. He knew that Kento had talked about this at the show, but he figured it was just a bit of a joke. He hadn’t been able to tell if your boyfriend was serious or not. But he understands that the blond man had, in fact, been quite serious about the situation.
“Wanna see how cute she gets when she gets horny?” Kento asks the brunette.
“Uh—yes! Yes I do.”
You love the way Yu is so eager for all of this. He’s so excited to be a part of this. Kento hikes up the skirt you’re wearing, showing off the cute little panties you’re wearing. It’s almost embarrassing for you, but being exposed really has your heart racing.
“Come here, Yu.” Kento beckons.
Yu is quick to crawl over to the both of you, and Kento guides him to get on his hands and knees. Haibara doesn’t even think twice about it. The minute he’s between your thighs, he’s going crazy with just the smell of you.
“Push her panties to the side,” Kento instructs. “She loves when I get a little impatient with her and just push them to the side.”
You let out the cutest whimper when Yu does exactly what Kento tells him to. You look down at the cute guy between your legs, and he looks up at you with his pupils blown wide with lust. Your pussy is on display, and he loves the way there’s a string of arousal that clings to your panties. He leans in closer, and with Kento’s approval, he begins to press kisses to your clit.
Your eyes roll back. He’s so gentle and sweet, which is a bit of a contrast to the rough and passionate that Kento can be sometimes. His tongue is so warm as he swipes it against your folds. You tremble at every movement he does. You reach down to run your fingers through his hair, praising him for being such a good boy.
Yu’s cock twitches in his pants from the praise. You smell and taste so good, he’s not even really able to think straight. All he can think about is how badly he wants to make you cum. He wants to keep drinking up your juices until you push him away from the overstimulation.
“F-fuck,” you breathe out. “I’m gonna cum.”
“Already? Wow, princess, you must have really been wanting this.” Kento teases before he reaches under your shirt.
He’s tugging on your nipples, toying with the piercings there. And Yu’s suckling on your clit, his lips latched on. He moans with every stroke of his tongue, rendering you into a moaning mess. It takes very little to pull you over the edge, and you have a very sticky and wet orgasm all over his tongue.
“That’s my good girl,” Kento praises, pressing a kiss to your sweaty temple.
Yu backs off when you begin to whine. He knows that he’s satisfied you well beyond what he intended. He looks up at both of you from his position on the ground, expecting a little praise as well. You reach down and push his hair back from his face.
“Fuck you are amazing.”
Yu smiles happily, resting his face on your thigh and gently caressing your pussy. You shudder with every brush of his thumb against your clit. He loves the way you’re so sensitive after cumming.
“Wanna do this on the couch, baby?” Kento asks you, kissing your lips.
“Mhmm…” you smile sweetly. “Yeah I do.”
Him and Haibara help you up, bringing you to the couch. Kento positions you so that you’re bent over the arm of the couch. Then he looks in your eyes and smiles.
“Who do you want where?” Kento asks, wanting your consent.
“Mmmm…can I have Yu fuck me?”
Kento smirks at the brunette. Yu is achingly hard in his pants. Then Kento comes over, cupping Yu’s face. You watch over your shoulder and you see them kissing gently. It’s tentative, but it’s so fucking hot. Kento unbuckles Yu’s belt and helps him out of his pants. Your eyes bulge when you see how hard Yu is.
“You want that, baby?” Kento asks as he begins to stroke Haibara.
“Fuck yes, please.”
Haibara comes over to you, spreading your legs. He looks at your tight little holes. He doesn’t know that he’s ever done anything quite like this. His fingers slide up and down your folds, spreading your wetness around a little more. Then he grasps his cock, positioning himself. Slowly, he slides into your warmth. 
“She feels good, yeah?” Kento asks as he makes his way over to you. “Y-yeah…so warm.”
Kento chuckles as he watches his new friend fuck his girlfriend. You and Kento have always talked about a situation like this, and it was finally happening. You look up at your lover and he smirks. Yu picks up his pace, fucking himself into you harder.
“She really loves it when you go deep,” Kento explains, cupping your face. “Deep and fast and hard.”
Yu nods his head, pushing his shirt up from his belly and placing it between his teeth so he can see himself fucking you. You let out the cutest moans, clearly loving this treatment. He wonders if you enjoy being teased by Kento, and he can see that this is something you two like to partake in together.
“Open up,” Kento says to you. “Show him how good of a cocksucker you are.”
Without hesitation, you let Kento enter your mouth. With both your mouth and pussy being filled, you don’t know how much longer you can last. Your walls are already fluttering around Yu’s girth, making him grunt and gasp. Kento loves the way he’s able to keep control over the whole situation.
Kento leans over, pressing his cock even deeper down your throat. He gently caresses Yu’s face, pushing some hair out of his face. Yu blushes at the attention, and he feels his balls draw up.
“S-shit…” Yu breathes out. He reaches down between your thighs, rubbing your clit. “I’m gonna cum soon.”
You let out a cute moan, begging him to release inside of you. Yu is shocked by this, but he can’t help but get even closer to his release. He wants to make you cum more than anything.
“Make her cum first,” Kento says. He pushes you back down onto his cock, and you swallow around him. “Then she’ll show you how much of a cumslut she is.”
Yu’s head is swirling with dirty thoughts. His hips are stuttering as his climax is building fast, but he can tell you’re not far off either. Your walls contract around him, squeezing him tight. Kento’s bucking his hips, getting himself closer to his own orgasm.
You fall off the edge first, your moans being muffled by Kento’s thick cock. He grunts as he feels the vibrations all throughout his shaft. You shudder and shake as the pleasure takes hold, and your little pussy is milking Yu.
“Go on, princess. Show Yu how good of a cumslut you can be.”
Yu’s pace falters as the pleasure gets to a peak. He grunts loudly as he falls off the edge next, his hands digging into your hips bruisingly. He fucks his cum deep inside of you, momentarily forgetting how irresponsible that is. Then he slowly begins to come down. 
Kento’s next. He growls loudly as ropes of his cum fill your mouth. You eagerly swallow it all up, and he caresses your cheek when he pulls out. Yu pulls out next, mesmerized by the way his seed leaks out of your tight little hole.
Kento comes over after he’s tucked himself back into his pants. He pats Yu on the shoulder, smirking to the brunette.
“Told you she’s a good little cumslut. Give her time to recover and then you can try out her mouth, yeah?”
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sakuraharukaaa · 2 days
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just a short, fluffy fanfic about my baby son that I wrote in like an hour ♥♥ too lazy to publish on ao3 for now, but maybe later
word count: 1197 words
It’s the smallest things in life. The little things that slowly creep into his daily life until they become a part of his routine. 
People are so adaptable, Haruka can’t help but think. It’s somewhat of a motto, though the connotation used to be negative in the past. He used to think of himself as someone durable who can withstand whatever life throws on him. He always believed that staying firm would keep him safe in the troubling currents of life. He didn’t realize that he, too, can change so much. 
It starts with Nirei, who shows him a pack of tea he got the day earlier. 
“It’s my favorite!” He says ever so enthusiastically. He insists on Haruka drinking it. 
But I don’t like tea that much. It stands on the tip of his tongue, yet he doesn’t say it. The taste is just okay. Barely passable, if he’d be honest, but for some reason he cannot refuse when Nirei shoves the almost-full box into his hands. 
He writes it off as something to put in his cabinet, a single box in an empty shelf – what a laughable idea. He can’t really drink it though, since he doesn’t own a kettle.
Suou is always too perceptive. Haruka finds it mildly annoying, especially when he sticks too close to Nirei. Something about an instinct to tell him off, to tell him that Haruka knew him first, and he shouldn’t be so chummy with Nirei. 
Whatever. 
That weasel approaches a couple of days later, talking about Nirei’s favorite tea, because of course he’d know about it. 
“It is quite good, I was surprised.” His smile is odd and sometimes uncomfortable, but Haruka learned to live with it. The hostility wasn’t targeted towards him, it’s just a general warning. “You should drink good tea in a good cup.” 
So he gives Haruka a weird mug with some calligraphy on it. It’s not legible, in no way it is, and Haruka still doesn’t own a kettle. 
He mentions the kettle debacle – off handedly, really – to Kotoha, and she immediately breaks into laughter. It’s a strange noise and he’s about to comment about it, when she suddenly stops. 
“Hold on, do I have an old one?” She speaks quietly, more to herself rather than to him. “It has to be an electric one.” And she leaves for the back storage room without saying a thing. 
Trust her to be a problem solver, of course. She emerges from the storage room with an old, gray kettle. 
“You have to be careful with the cord.” She says with a shy smile that doesn’t suit her. “If you pull too strongly on it, it will expose the wires.” And only then Haruka notices the tape around the end of the cord, a shoddy fix he assumes. 
Honestly? It’s better than nothing. 
So he takes the kettle. 
(Haruka doesn’t even like tea, he’s more of a coffee guy. 
He could make coffee with the kettle in his home, if he so desires, but it takes a long time until he realizes that. By then, he finds an appropriate excuse – he cannot make coffee as good as Kotoha’s with this old thing. 
Better stick to the tea.)
The next one is Umemiya, who somehow heard about the kettle incident. Probably got the information from Kotoha by torture (read: annoying her). He thinks it’s okay to turn it into a charity case, or so Haruka assumes because he never truly understands him. 
So he stops Haruka after a long, long day where nothing worked out, and his big, dumb smile is too blinding right now. 
“I hear you’re furnishing your room!” He’s far too energetic and Haruka grits his teeth. 
APARTMENT, not room, he almost says, and he doesn’t believe that a single box of tea and an ugly mug and an old kettle warrant the use of the word furnishing. It’s literally three items. 
“I thought I’d give you this!” At first Haruka doesn’t realize what this is, until he notices that the hand holding a pot is extended towards him. 
“No way.” He flat out refuses. He can’t believe he was called to the rooftop for this shit. Behind Umemiya, Hiragi is giving him a resigned sympathetic look. 
Umemiya has plenty of reasons why he should take the plant – of course he does! – and at some point Hiragi exasperatedly signs him to give up. 
His pride takes somewhat of a hit when he comes home with that plant that evening. 
(Sugishita gave him a watering can. 
That bastard actually gave him a watering can. 
He doesn’t say anything but he leaves it on Haruka’s desk alongside fucking four pages of how to take care of plants. 
Jesus Christ.)
It’s after a training session when he goes around the neighborhood with Kaji on a semi-patrol (more like an excuse to get candies because Kaji was running low and Haruka didn’t want to test his patience). Haruka doesn’t eat that stuff so he buys a drink at the vending machine next to the store. When he puts the change straight into his pocket, he catches Kaji’s slanted eyes judging him. 
“Really? That’s barbaric.” And Haruka has to summon all of his self restraint to stop himself from saying that Kaji is the barbaric one for making the nasty lump on the back of Haruka’s head. He doesn’t need another one to match the first. 
The next day, he receives a coin purse. A bit worn out at the seams, but it looks it was taken good care of. He is silent when Kaji hands him that, already knowing not to put up a fight. 
Haruka, unfortunately, doesn’t like coin purses or wallets, so he leaves it on the window sill, next to the plant. It doesn’t feel like it belongs inside the kitchen’s cabinets, so the window sill it is. 
Over the next weeks, it becomes worse. He gets a phone case from Kiryuu – a pink one with cherry blossoms to match his name, and he gets a huge water bottle from Tsugeura that was supposed to have some motivational quote on it, but Suou points out the English doesn’t make sense. When the other guys catch wind of that, they start giving him small things too. It is mostly stationary, but some of his classmates went to town on it. Someone gave him a small radio, which was neat and actually useful, but on the other hand, he got a fucking fork with a handle that was painted like a train. He did use it though, because no one was there to judge him for that when he was eating, and it certainly was more useful than the hot girl calendar he got. 
It’s all so odd when he’s home during the weekend, and he’s drinking tea from his ugly mug and eating with his train fork and staring at the plant on his window sill. It did grow nicely, that he has to admit, and somewhere along the way, it grew on him. 
That doesn’t mean he’s going to take on that offer for a second plant though. 
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sentientgolfball · 11 hours
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Mushy May: Cuteness Aggression
Gonna be real I wasn't planning on doing mushy may because school and writing challenges scare me buuuuuut I was suddenly struck with the mood so here it is :3 Shoutout to @forlorn-crows for the prompts
Can't promise I'll do all the days, but I do have a sweet little Phantrora thing in the works
Word Count: 843
Pairing: Cirtom
Cirrus is going to lose her mind. 
It had been a slow day for her, finishing all of her chores bright and early to have the rest of the day to relax. She had come back to the den around lunchtime, curling up in her nest with lemonade and a strawberry and cream sandwich. She had thrown back her blinds and soaked up the spring sun while continuing a book Mountain had recommended to her. It was nice, peaceful. She hadn’t realized how much time had passed until a sweet scent wafted into her room, catching her attention. 
She had marked her place in her book, pausing in the middle of a paragraph to scent the air, trying to see if she could place the smell. Someone was definitely making some form of pastry in the kitchenette. She stood, cracked her back with a groan and decided to go scope it out. Maybe she’d be able to get a little taste before the rest of the pack returned. 
She assumed she’d walk out there to see Cumulus with flour streaked across her face, brow furrowed as she tried to read and understand what the recipe was telling her. If not her then definitely Swiss would be there shaking his ass to whatever music would be blasting in his headphones while he carefully measures everything out. What she saw when she turned the corner though was so much sweeter than anything she could’ve imagined. 
Phantom is standing with their hands on their hips, head cocked slightly to the right as they stare at the binder with all the pack recipes. There’s a smudge of batter on their cheek and to top it all off they have a cute, pink little apron tied tight around their body. When the timer dings their ears perk up, tail twitching back and forth, and that cute, easy smile returns to their face. Cirrus is going to scream as she watches Phantom carefully take the cinnamon rolls out the oven, cheering quietly to themselves when they see they didn’t deflate. 
When Phantom finally turns, noticing Cirrus standing in the hallway, they shriek. They clutch their chest and take a few deep, steadying breaths. 
“Shit Cir you scared the fuck out of me” they huff a laugh. 
Hearing their voice breaks her spell of paralysis. She smiles wide and soft, walking over to join them in the kitchen. 
“Whatcha doing love bug?” 
“Making cinnamon rolls” they say as they filter around the kitchen, preparing a piping bag to frost the pastries. 
“Any particular reason?” She asks. 
“Dew’s summoning day is coming up yea? I know he likes it when Swiss makes these so I wanted to try it” a small blush creeps onto their face as they give their reasoning. 
Oh, she can barely stand it. The sheepish little way their ears flick, the focus on their face as they frost each individual roll, that fucking apron. She’s losing her mind and all they’re doing is baking. She just wants to squeeze them and shake them and kiss them silly. 
“Tada! They just need to finish cooling and they’ll be done! What do you think Cir?” They turn back towards her, a wide grin plastered to their face. 
She can’t help herself. 
She crowds them back up against the counter, caging them in with her arms. They squeak with the suddenness of it, eyebrows shooting up as they stare at her. Cirrus just laughs and peppers their face in little kisses, nipping playful at their ear. They smell like brown sugar and cinnamon, sweet. They giggle and purr with each press of Cirrus’ lips and her heart just aches. 
“You are the cutest, sweetest fucking thing love bug.” 
“Cirrrr stoooop you can’t just say that” they whine but the smile never leaves their face. 
“Why not?”
Kiss.
“I think I should be allowed to compliment you..”
Kiss.
“Whenever..”
Kiss.
“I want.”
Kiss.
“Especially when it turns you into a little pile of ghoul mush.”
Kiss. 
They’re practically glowing, deep purple blush on the tips of their ears and spilling from their cheeks to their neck. A little bolt of quintessence ripples across their Lichtenberg figure scars and Cirrus laughs. She presses a kiss to their lips, smiling when the sound of their tail beating against the counter reaches her ears. When they part, Phantom grins and kisses the tip of her nose. 
“If you help me clean up I’ll let you have some. These were just a test batch anyway.” 
She swipes the smudge of batter off their face and licks it from her thumb. She chirps when the sweetness hits her, feathers ruffling for a moment before settling back down. 
“Oh, that’s good. You’ve got yourself a deal.”
She places one last big kiss on their cheek with an over-exaggerated ‘mwah’ before stepping back, giving them room to move. 
“Hey, quick question?” 
“Hm?” 
“Where’d you get the apron?” 
“Oh! Cumulus said I could borrow it.” 
Cirrus nods with a hum, “ask her if you can keep it.”
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copper-16 · 1 day
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why do you reckon mapi and ingrid may be being more private with their lives? im not tryna be a freak or anything like that, im just curious if something happened for them to do that? or is it just a suspicion you have? again, not tryna come across as weird, i just wish the best for them and totally understand why they wanna be more private considering the eyes on them and especially more if something happened x
Okay so we did end up getting a birthday post (I’ve never been more thrilled to be wrong about something!), but I definitely have seen some discourse about Mapi and Ingrid becoming a little bit more private on social media. Not a whole ton, obviously they still post each other quite a bit (I haven’t really noticed a difference to be honest), but I have seen some people discussing it for some reason.
I think it feeds into a bigger discourse of footballers and the line between their private versus public lives, and where fans fit into that.
Mapi and Ingrid both have been very open in the past, but they are both getting more famous. And with more fame, comes more online abuse and just overall more dialogue about their lives and choices. Perhaps they just want to live their lives as they please, without having to appease or perform on social media, or be subjected to any sort of abuse/homophobia/whatever it is. Everyone has their limits.
I think it’s important for people to remember that these are real people, with real lives, and we cannot grow so attached to people or the idea of a person in our mind that we aren’t still respectful of their boundaries. I probably sound like a huge hypocrite saying this, but as much as I enjoy writing about these women, I don’t find myself in any sort of like para-social relationships with them, and I caution anyone against growing so invested. When I write about them, I’m not attempting to write about real people, but more along the lines of a character that is based off of that person (utilizing the fact that my audience already understands the characters and often the setting, and I don’t have to do that myself). Thats one of the reasons that fanfiction can be so enjoyable for people to write and read, is this idea that it’s easier to understand because both the author and audience already have an idea of the world/people/setting, and the author doesn’t have to spend the time and word count setting that up. It’s not that writing about these people is us trying to invade their lives or change history, but rather utilize our own creativity to think of our own stories. No writer, including myself, should ever claim in this sphere of writing to be writing the truth, because we don’t know these people!
I know there has been a lot of discussion on invasions of privacy, and I might get some push back on this but I figured I would state my own thoughts. People are more than allowed to disagree, I think there’s room for healthy discussion without being cruel toward one another:
I don’t see that big of a problem with writing about or discussing football and footballers on platforms like Tumblr and ao3, where the chances for these people to actually view what is being discussed is very, very low. In my mind, players would at that point be seeking out that information, and that is their choice and within their boundaries to do or not do, as they see fit. People are naturally curious, they have questions and want to connect with others about things they enjoy, and I see platforms like Tumblr and ao3 as a way to do so. People can learn, discuss, debate, etc with the freedom that these players are not on the platform, and will therefore not see what they are saying. I think it’s healthier that way, for all involved, to have a level of disconnect. I do think there are still lines to be drawn on these apps, I’m not saying it’s a free for all, but I tend to be more forgiving of potential mistakes or more risqué posts because I doubt that these people will ever see them.
I personally see a much larger problem being had on platforms like Instagram and Twitter and TikTok, with heavy amounts of abuse and overly harsh criticism about honestly all aspects of their lives. There is a difference between discussion and constructive criticism and bashing someone, or being abusive. Players see these things, we clearly know this, they are people too with feelings and bad days and people need to respect that and have some empathy. I find fault with Tumblr posts when someone on twitter/instagram/tiktok pulls a post and put it on one of those platforms. Why people would do that and open players up to seeing these things is beyond me, and feels disrespectful to all parties involved honestly.
I also see a lot of issues on those apps with invasion of privacy. My take on the issue has always been if a player has posted something, that is public knowledge that is allowed to be consumed, because they have made the choice to post and share that with the world. There’s a difference between scrolling back a few years to find a funny picture of a player when she was younger on her instagram page and ending up on her aunts friends Facebook page, digging up pictures from 2012 to use in some facet. Or taking something that someone has since deleted, or somehow getting a photo from a private account that might be a personal photo. There’s a line, and sure, it might fluctuate a little depending on the person because we all were raised differently and have different boundaries, but I still believe there is still a universal level of respect that can be upheld. We are not entitled to anything, the fact that we get to engage with these women and learn about their lives is a PRIVILEGE, and not a RIGHT. I think people often forget this.
Anyways, this got very long and waxy, which I apologize for. I’m sure I’ll get some pushback for this, because everyone feels a little differently on the subject, but this is simply where I stand. People are welcome to disagree and discuss as long as it is done so respectfully!
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crybaby-bkg · 1 year
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broke and busted boyfriend Dabi that bugs you so he can come to your lash, hair, and nail appointments only to sit there on his phone and complain about how long the process is. the only thing he pays for are snacks when you get annoyed with his complaints, and conveniently disappears when it’s time to pay for the actual service. he does buy you your favorite candy bar tho so it balances out
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beatcroc · 1 month
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turns out i have to make an unnecessarily wordy thoughtspost about doombox too bc there is nothing about this character that isn't fucking ridiculous and also really funny and i'm kind of really obsessed with all of it. ordinarily i would just start firing but in this case I need to just. paste his bio and then go through it step by step because every phrase here is absurd when looking at how he's handled along with the other characters and the world as a whole. here we go
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first sidenote: i should also add 'nonsensical' to the list of descriptors up there, because this is a fighting game and no doubt has the typical Bad Fighting Game Writing at play that doesn't really hold up when put under scrutiny as i'm about to, but understand that this is something i've come to love about the genre and its typically batshit lore, and it further enhances the experience for me. it's all utter nonsense and its my favorite shit ever.
the biggest thing to me that makes his entire shtick ridiculous is that he was explicitly made to be a weapon. like his express purpose is destruction and/or killing people, and he certainly has the disposition to be doing that. except that he is not doing that. he's out there playing Ball Game, evidently of his own volition.
i feel it is also important to highlight that he was not originally or intentionally a boombox; he just kinda lives in there. his own bio frames it as happenstance, but sonata's dlc skin lore** implies he isn't permanently stuck in there and can kinda just hop out and take control of whatever he wants whenever he wants. there is an entire goddamn tank just sitting there in the background of one of these stages. he is a weapon. there is heavy artillery readily available to him that he could be commanding if he wanted to, but he's not doing that either. he is still a boombox. i think he likes it in there. *there's an argument to be made that maybe he's not powerful enough to control something that large, or maybe just that switching hosts is really tiring or risky. im just saying though there's like a bajillion host devices better suited for A Fucking Weapon than a boombox, but he seems really committed to this for some reason. while im here btw it's fucking terrifying that he apparently can possess thing that are Not tech as well **as a side note from that the specific mention of her boomhammer is interesting. i don't think it's an intentional implication but i enjoy the idea he has an affinity for sound-based devices; i like to think the boombox left an impression on him with its being the initial thing he possessed and got used to
and then there is the berserking. the 'rampaging', as it is otherwise called. not exactly strange on its own given his temperament and designation, but strange for the way it's characterized as only a tendency. it's only that he's prone to rampaging. he rampages often, but not all the time. just often! what is he doing he is not rampaging? getting a custom trimmed jacket with his own logo emblazoned on it? like a nerd? and on the flipside, what exactly do these rampages even entail? because it's apparently not anything destructive or disruptive enough for anyone to care about stopping him under normal circumstances.
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like how are you a giant angry "not exactly stable" weapon of a guy and everyone's like 'yeah that's fine. that's our doombox!' toxic's specific wording regarding his getting unfucked postgame is "back to his old raging self", which implies to me there's almost a certain fondness, or at least amusement, at his being like this. i know one of the core themes of lethal league is letting these oddball misfit dudes do their thing and freely be who they are, but like. is doombox sincerely just not a threat for that? like really? dice's interactions also sort of imply that his actually trying to kill someone is really out of the ordinary for him so truly like. db my man what ARE you doing out there. * re: toxic and dice's talking about him; i do also find it amusing that one of his defining traits is just being pissed off all the time. again, not surprising given his purpose/designation as a weapon, but funny in that it's like. how he's KNOWN; in the sense that it is immediately noticeable and a cause for concern for other characters to see he is Not angry. fuckin social barometer of a guy. local angry guy isn't angry, something's wrong.
the "reasons for playing in the league unknown" bit also strikes me as a little odd even though it REALLY shouldn't. i'm like 97% sure it's just written like that to make him seems mysterious and unpredictable and dangerous, but it's a weird thing to call attention to when you consider that...less than half of the other characters' reasons are known? raptor is there trying to get info on his dad, that one's well out there. dust & ashes i think have some kind of implied reason for being there as well but it of course isn't elaborated on, and grid is like trying to impress "the youth" and establish a profile or something. nitro seems like he might not actually be IN the league as an official competitor? it's just helpful for him to know how to ball for the situations he gets into with his investigations. everybody else's "reason" pretty much seems like they're just out there to have fun. and toxic says as much in the story mode intro! the game was developed for people to escape the monotonies of shine city! so to imply doombox has a separate, non-recreational reason for being here is weird. the easiest read on it for me is just that he was drawn to it cause it's intense and destructive but at the same time.... if all he wants is an excuse to wreck shit....why are you competing in a structured sports game with rules and shit my dude. you are a weapon. just go attack people. except that we've established that he doesnt really do that. so. once again. what IS he doing out here
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aside from the bio though, there's of course random little tidbits of characterization throughout the game itself and they are all also likewise ridiculous.
he refers to himself in third person, which is always an amusing choice for a character in general. it carries with it a certain sense of ego, an awareness of and and pride in one's presence and gravitas. this was mostly just surprising to me bc before i started looking at everything, i'd assumed he was more or less mindless and, yknow, robotic; without much personality/reason for being there beyond being the Biggest Baddest Best At Ball Game Guy doombox is already very imposing, so this is frankly a well-earned sense of pride for him to have.....but it still doubles back to being funny again because, as i've established above, he could stand to be a hell of a lot scarier! but he doesn't seem to notice or care that there are many readily-available options for becoming more powerful and/or establishing himself as unquestionable top dog. so instead he is a boombox. third-person is also often used for characters who are a little dumb, and i think this applies to doombox as well. he is a weapon, and clearly a brute-force-over-precision type of weapon at that, he doesnt need smarts. i think this is also sort of hinted at with his voice lines; where the other characters have some kind of snarky phrase or one-liner for their kill/score voice line, doombox just goes "bye-bye". Which is still appropriately Disrespectful, but it's also very, uh... simple. again i just think there are... more imposing things a guy like him could be saying there, but i guess he hasn't got anything more than fucking. bye-bye.
anyways the ego thing i think is well-echoed by his stupid fucking jacket. none of the other characters have their logo as part of their design and i'm pretty sure the rest of the symbols are just game abstractions and don't exist in-universe, but like. doombox is just going around wearing a jersey with his own damn face on it. ok. to be clear i love his jacket but it is literally so silly for him to have that. imagine being the guy having to custom-fit a fucking boombox. did db pay for it? how? we're getting into unproductive territory here but you could ask a million questions about that jacket and they all have hysterical implications. while im on the topic of designs i'd also like to say that while i don't count any of the other blaze redesigns as "canon" like actual events the characters went through between games [like raptor in particular would have already had to have the stitches since that's his backstory, it's just they weren't a design point before], doombox is in a weird spot since the first game's design for him was very specifically referencing its HUD in a meta way for his flavor and that was pretty much the entire extent of his flavor; while in blaze he and the HUD are very much separate distinct things with their own flavor. there's more to talk about here later but as it pertains to design what im saying is i think he just went out and found a better and cooler boombox to be in between games. and also got a funny jacket. *actually i have no idea if there's even a Timeline here. the gut vibe i had been running on was that blaze happens a couple years after the original, but looking at it now that doesn't seem right. does blaze Replace the timeline of the first game? are there even Events in the first game to count as a timeline? do they run concurrently?
alright anyway the last point here is the 3rd-person thing is even moreso interesting to me though bc i was under the assumption that 'doombox' was something akin to a codename he was given when other people saw this big fucking Thang rampaging through the streets. but seeing as 1. he's definitely aware of it, and 2. not even the damn scientists who made him knew he was in a boombox [as implied in his dlc skin lore], i'm led to believe he came up with the name himself. the fucking tape in his cassette player does just say 'doom' on it so i am choosing to believe that's either where he got the name, or that he put that on there himself.
MOVING on, another really good thing is that he does this
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i just think it's funny he's continuing to use the thing as an actual boombox; i feel like that isn't something he necessarily Has to do. obviously he's susceptible to certain quirks and limitations of being a boombox re: mind control tape, but i don't think that means he has to play out its every function. i think he's doing that on purpose and i am filing it under "he likes it in there". hes listening to his jams.
also on a similar note,
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this is also not important and i realize it's mostly just a quirky videogamey way to get around saying the robot kinda character is "asleep", but i do enjoy the implication that shine city's biggest terror is like out there running on 4 D-cells.
also i'm making this guy out to be a city street menace, and the vibe i had assumed for him before was like, a random encounter in the back alleys that you super do not want to run into; but his associated stage/hangout seems to be the desert/scrapyard? which i don't really have anything interesting to say to that, but it's definitely a different vibe for his character if he typically hangs out in more desolate areas.
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i think maybe the most baffling thing doombox has going on is the apparent "rivalry" with dice. this is also bizzare from dice's side of things. what the fuck does it even mean to be "rivals" with doombox? what are they competing for? what kind of things does dice get up to that doombox would even give a shit about in the first place, let alone to be considered a rival in? i mean, like, the league, probably, but why dice specifically, out of everyone? would doombox's league rival not just be whoever's the [second] strongest there? i believe dice when he says they're evenly-matched, but there isn't really anything that implies dice is of particularly high prestige within the league so it feels like he shouldn't hold much interest as a target. to be fair dice doesn't seem like the type that would care about prestige, but again, if he's not out there flaunting his shit or trying to claim he's the best or whatever, why does db care? this would be a lot easier to understand if it was a one-sided thing on doombox's part like okay maybe dice pissed him off one day and he's still mad about it. whatever. that's the vibe they go for in story mode, but then there's dice's dlc skin description, which seems to run entirely counter to that and has dice as the aggressor:
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when deprived of his usual sense and restraint, dice's first thought is I Gotta Go Fuckin Kill Doombox? even if he's over it under normal circumstances, it's clear both of them have some deeper-rooted beef in this exchange. there is yet another layer to this in that doombox is, weirdly enough, not really shown to be the kind of guy that's interested in revenge. again, going back to his own dlc description, he- and i quote- "couldn't care less" about the guys who made him capturing him and chaining him up. his only interest there is breaking out and getting back to doing his thing. if you want to be really generous, you could also read this vibe from the story mode epilogue: doombox was not the one hunting down the safety league, that was nitro. doombox was simply, as stated before "back to his old raging self". both of these to say, he simply does not seem to give a shit about people who have directly wronged him and only wants to Do His Thing. so. once again. what the fuck is going on with dice that they both have lasting beef here. i truly cannot fathom what either of them did to be so mad specifically at eachother. this rivalry is something they reference a LOT too like it's a big deal in-universe, or something otherwise really important to portray. like
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lore so strong you gotta put it on an achievement!!!!! really!!!!! and there are no details whatsoever about this????? * while i'm here i'd just like to say have more questions about dice than fucking anything else in this game. sadly there's practically nothing to intuit from the game about any of his situations so i don't have much for coherent thoughts to post on him, but my god. what the fuck, dice. this rivalry is arguably the single strangest thing doombox has going on but it doesn't even break top 5 weird things about dice.
anyways, the final section and MOST interesting thing to me in all this is that, coming out of the first game, i was really under the impression that doombox is just the arbitrary final boss monster you gotta kill; no real purpose or personality his own to speak of, and most importantly just synonymous with the game itself and its aesthetics re: mirroring the HUD design. he certainly still holds the role of big scary final boss monster in blaze too, but blaze 1. has him much more fleshed-out as his own Guy, and more importantly, 2. doesn't really consider him a Problem like your typical big angry final boss monster. or at least not moreso than anything else going on in the game. he's not a threat to be eliminated, he's respected as a character and as a competitor in the league; and more than that he just seems to be... liked? as in, liked by other people in-universe? and he's liked enough that they'll readily help him out so he can keep doing his thing? i do think latch fixed him up postgame mostly bc he felt bad about being the one responsible for getting db brainwashed in the first place but like. the game could have just as easily gone "and then doombox was defeated yay" and left it at that. instead, they seem to have a vested interest in keeping him around. most transparently this is likely just a "we can't get rid of any of the playable characters or else story mode would be noncanon", BUT the point of this post is trying to read cohesive narrative sense into places there probably isn't any, and my read here is that doombox is a sort of inadvertent guardian of the league. for 1, he does still very much embody a lot of what the game [both The Videogame and the league itself] is about, but more importantly i think his presence is just really good at keeping a lot of the more minor threats at bay. if you try to fuck with the league, you will eventually be squaring off with doombox, most likely having freshly pissed him off in the process, and i can't imagine that goes well for who or whatever is in that situation. there's probably not much that wants to stand up to him by himself, and there's even less that can challenge the league as a whole unit; he's really just a good guy to have on your side like in general when you are running an illegal sports operation. i think at Worst toxic might see him as the league's funny little mascot but realistically i think she has more respect for him than that. either way i don't think he's going to care and it doesn't affect him much regardless. for this, doombox simply gets to keep doing his thing, whatever the fuck that may be. there are certainly still forces beyond his control at play here [as demonstrated in story mode by the safety league], and when these come into play, the league in turn looks out for him and keeps him on top of his game. i'm not sure if he has the, uh.... kind of cognitive ability that he could be grateful for this, but if nothing else, we know he seems to enjoy playing in the league, so he probably at least recognizes that he's not going to meet a lot of resistance in it and/or that it's a good environment to keep doing as he pleases. i don't mean for this all to sound so transactional, but it's hard to say whether he has much charisma in-universe for people to want him around for more "legitimate" reasons. likewise, there's also still a lot up in the air on how like... sapient doombox actually is. whether he can have complex motivations about anything or if he has some concept of "having friends" or if he can experience emotions besides rage; i tend to lean to "no" on those because i am really trying my damndest not to woobify this guy, but ultimately i don't think it matters much; in the end, he and the league are still mutually beneficial for eachother, and they still enjoy having the other around. and i think that's pretty cool :)
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