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writerofthewinds · 2 years

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Drag night contest ! Aiden Flynn x DragQueen Reader

total words :1188

You were waking up to a ray of sunlight that slipped through the curtains of the bedroom you and Aiden were sharing together. You were the first one to wake up. As you were checking what hour was displayed on your phone you couldn't stop yourself from staring at Aiden's sleepy face. He looked so beautiful with his green hair and chiseled body. You went to the kitchen to prepare breakfast and thought anxiously about announcing to your boyfriend what your job is and what his reaction would be. Would he be judging you? Supporting you? As you were anxiously lost in your thoughts you forgot that you were stirring your soup and accidentally touched the burning pot. AHHHHHHHHHH SHIT !!! You screamed as you took your hand away from the burning pot. Your scream of pain woke Aiden up he rushed to the kitchen to see what was happening.

Honey, what's happening? Aiden said looking worried. I accidentally burned myself while cooking breakfast. Wait let me check he said. Don't worry you'll be fine I saw the worst at camp I have a cream that can help you wait. As he went to the bathroom. You couldn't help but think what a wonderful boyfriend you have, which made you even more stressed than he could think about your job. Your thoughts were interrupted when he returned from the bathroom with some cream and bandages. Hey, come here gimme your hand, ok here you go. He applied the cream and wrapped your burned hand with some bandages after finishing he kissed your hand. Here you go you will be fine it will be gone in no time trust me he said with a proud smile. Thank you honey you said while kissing him. OH SHIT what's happening? I'm gonna be late for work I need to go .Y/N wait I can bring you there he said. Don't worry I'm going to get by see ya you said while slamming the door of your apartment in a hurry.

You ran to the bar where you do all of your drag performances. As you entered the establishment you saw your biggest rival your nemesis Amy Thyst recognizable with her purple hair and makeup looking like an amethyst hence her name. So why did you arrive late huh? She said with a mocking tone. It's none of your business Amy leave me alone. Aww, you hurt your hand that's tragic, hope you won't need it for tonight. You remembered why that day was so important today was the finale of the annual contest in your town the winner will get 20 000 Dollars plus would have the chance to perform at the Stonewall Inn with its history and fame would make you famous. Little did you know you had all chances to win and Amy knew that perfectly so she had a plan to make you lose so she can get the jackpot. The plan was simple to tell your boyfriend what your job was so he will go there and make you fail the performance.

Aiden was checking the mailbox as he always does and then sees an unusual letter and invite . Curious he opens it and it is an invite in purple ink with a photo was written finale of the annual drag contest he took the photo that showed the two finalists he examined it and was shocked when he recognized you he saw right through your makeup heels and wig. He found you fantastic and decided to cancel his plans for the day to watch your show all of this completely unknown to you. You were preparing in your loge being completely freaking out this was the chance of your life .

You managed to hold yourself together and overcame your stage fright and joined the stage for the finale of the contest the song. You and Amy had to make and perform if you won this round you win the competition .Amy started singing a song from the 70's and once she finished the public applauded .And Amy approached you and said : you will never win this i made sure of it .You frowned wondering what did she meant by that .You brushed it off and started singing as you were singing the song you made wich made the public surprised because they don't know the song. As you were singing and scanning the crowd you spotted Aiden and made eye contact with him he smiled at you and you panicked .

You were crying infront of the mirror in your lodge , feeling desperate and humiliated. But then, Aiden suddenly appeared behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist and kissing your neck gently.

"Hey, don't worry baby," he said softly. "I still think you look incredible. I'm just so proud of you."

You looked at him and managed a small smile, feeling a surge of confidence wash over you. You continued to perform your song, feeling stronger than ever as Aiden smiled at you with admiration in his eyes.

You forgot the lyrics of the song and started humming instead and you saw Amy smiling at you while singing her song. Aiden was shocked but remembered your words when he said how amazing you were so he stood up and threw a tomato at Amy hitting her straight in the face . Startled she screamed I'M BLEEDING!!! I NEED TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL. You totally forgot about her and won the contest even bigger than expected.

As you walked off stage victorious, a shower of cheers and confetti falling down all around you, you couldn't help but smile as your fans showered you with praise for your incredible performance. Still feeling adrenalin pumping through your veins, you headed to the dressing room to get ready for your next show.

But as soon as you stepped into the room, all thoughts of celebration vanished from your mind as a searing pain shot through your burnt hand. Cursing under your breath, you quickly grabbed some ointment from your drawer

And applied it to your hand, gritting your teeth against the pain.

While you were dealing with your hand, Amy came barging into the room, still fuming from her humiliating defeat. She glared at you as she spoke.

"You may have won this contest, but I'll make sure you never perform at the Stonewall Inn. You're nothing but a talentless fraud who doesn't deserve any of this!"

With those words, she turned and stormed out of the room, leaving you alone with your throbbing hand.

Sighing in frustration, you quickly finished getting ready for your next show and headed out onto the stage. Despite the pain in your hand, you managed to put on an amazing performance that had the entire audience on their feet cheering for more.

As you took your final bow and walked off stage, you couldn't help but wonder what Amy's next move would be. But one thing was for sure: no matter what she was planning to do you won and your boyfriend supported you u felt invincible .

#lgbtqia #male reader #lgbtqplus #lgbt representation #drag queen #camp buddy #pride month #story #gay reader #gay stories #gay #story prompt #writerofthewinds

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classic-caldwell-moment · 2 years

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This fic is just pure fucking pain. That's all I have to say.

Title: "Who Is She?"

Category: Angst.

Warnings: PTSD, nightmares, violence, panic attacks, body horror [?].

Summary: Aiden goes to retrieve Mia's teddy bear which she forgot in the toy box, but the hospital seems longer than before.

Aiden rummaged through the toy box quietly, he didn't know what he was looking for, but he was sure that he'd know when he found it, he disgarded colourful blocks and rubber ducks; dolls and plastic robots clattering to the linoleum floor behind him as he continued to dive into the cluttered box, pulling and tossing each toy that wasn't what he was after.

He breathed out shakily and looked around him nervously, he didn't want to get caught out past bed time, well, he assumed it was bed time, otherwise why would he be so quiet? Aiden sighed and returned to looking, tossing aside a pink bouncy ball and a frisbee as he continued to search.

Aiden's small hands finally found what he was looking for, he could tell it was what he wanted from the texture alone, pulling it out and proudly holding it up, Mia's bear! Of course that was what he was looking for, she needed it to sleep at night and must have forgot it, how could he forget that she asked him to get it?

He quickly stood to his feet and as if on cue, Mia called from beyond the room and down the corridor, "Aidy, c'mon!", he chuckled nervously and held the bear with care as he crept towards the door and stepped into the hallway; Aiden felt..sick, as he stared down the hall, it was unusually long but, maybe it was perspective.

"Aiiiidyyy!!!", Aiden swallowed his sick feeling and began to pad down the hallway, each barefooted step making a soft slap against the cold floor, "I'm coming, Mia! I've got your bear!" he called back, speeding up and jogging down the hallway, wait why was he suddenly being loud? What if he got caught? He paused and stared down the long hallway again, it felt like he hadn't moved at all.

Aiden looked down at the bear and back up to the hallway, staring down the white walls and equally white floors, "Aidy? Aidenbobaiden!", he took a deep breath and continued to walk, the bear felt heavy in his hands, like he was holding a brick in his small palms; he frowned but kept walking.

"I'm coming, don't worry! I've got the bear!" he called, though he was starting to feel like he was getting nowhere, was this hallway always so long? It had to be perspective, it just had to be, or was it his eyes? Doctor Waltz would have to check his eyes again- Waltz.

The bear dropped from Aiden's trembling hands and he struggled to pick it back up, but once his hands connected it crumbled into a teddy bear dust, his heart dropped and panic set in, "MIA?!" he screamed, abandoning the bear dust and starting to race down the corridor.

"MIA?! I'M COMING!" he yelled, stumbling over himself as he ran as fast as he could down the seemingly never ending corridor, the air felt hot like ash and he coughed on his own words, "MIA!!!" he broke into sobs and his hands shook; where was she?! What did- What did Waltz do to her?!

He tripped over and crashed into the floor, gritting his teeth and yelling in pain, "MIA!" he continued shouting for her, trying to get to his feet but his legs stung and ached when he tried to pull himself up, "Aiden?", Mia's voice, behind him, Aiden mustered up the courage to power through the pain and shakily stood to his feet; turning frantically to look for Mia.

A tall, fragile woman stood in the place of where he expected Mia to be, she was pale and sunken, Aiden stepped backwards and tried to speak but his voice trailed off, "Aiden." the woman had Mia's voice, he sobbed and continued to step backwards; "What- What's happening? I don't understand-" he stumbled over his words and he dug his nails into his palms.

"Aiden. Why did you leave me?" her voice was sorrowful and the woman hung her head, thick, black tears spilling down her cheeks as she looked back up at him, eyes empty and full of ebony fluid, "I didn- I didn't mean to, Mia! I did- the FIRE!" Aiden sobbed, shoulders trembling as he tried to breathe through his own tears; "You left me here to rot." she continued.

Aiden shook his head and hiccuped, "I didn't! You have to und- understand! You know I wouldn't leave you here!" he cried, the woman- Mia, it was Mia, why was he trying to tell himself she wasn't? She tilted her head and opened her mouth as if to speak; the thick, oil like fluid spilling from her jaws and splashing to the floor.

"You left me. And you let me die. Was I nothing to you?", Aiden felt a bit of him die at those words and dropped to his knees, slamming his fists angrily into his head, "I DIDN'T! YOU NEVER- YOU NEVER FUCKING LISTEN TO ME! YOU NEVER DID!" his voice was deeper and full of pain, he was no longer a little boy anymore, he sobbed and glared at the floor, the black fluid splashing across the ground towards him like a flood.

"It took you fifteen years to find me." Mia's voice broke into a childish laugh and she stepped towards Aiden, her feet getting smeared in the black tar, "And what happened when you did?", Aiden sobbed and couldn't bring himself to look at her, gnawing at his bottom lip and trying to ignore her, "You killed me.", he snapped; Aiden threw himself at her and knocked her to the floor.

"I DIDN'T FUCKING KILL YOU! IT'S NOT MY FAULT!" his voice was a deep snarl and he wrapped his hands around her throat, claws digging into her pale skin, "IT'S NOT MY FAULT! IT WAS NEVER MY FAULT-", Mia laughed through her black tears and didn't even fight back against him, watching his actions in amusement as black spit and snot dribbled down her face and chin, "Aiden-" she grinned and Aiden squeezed harder, "SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!" he sobbed.

Her form glitched and warped, but Aiden never let go, hands gripping her throat tightly as her flesh changed and swam, "You're a monster." her garbled voice sang and Aiden grit his teeth, sobbing loudly as he dug the claws deeper into the gross, goo skin of his sister- she wasn't his sister, she wasn't, who was she? Who was he? Wh-

Aiden jolted up in bed with a sob and stared into the purple lit room, gripping the blankets and breathing heavily, "I- Wh- Mia?" he stammered, looking around and seeing both Lawan and Hakon laying beside him, "What- The fuck..?" he whispered, laying back down and staring up at the ceiling, "What..the fuck...?", he squeezed his eyes shut again and slowly began to slip back into fitful sleep.

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oneoftheprettynerds · 3 years

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Just My Type: Dark!Steve x Reader (Mob AU)

Chapter 2 in the Lipstick and Crayons Series.

Chapter 1: Welcome to the Darkside

Main Masterlist

A/N: This chapter is 2K words more than the last chapter and I’ve second guessed every single line in this one. This story is getting a lot of traction guys and I’m equal parts happy and scared. Thank you for the nice comments, they do encourage me. Also I’m just ranting feel free to skip this note haha. Your support in any form: like, comment or reblog is appreciated greatly. Also you can dm if you want to be friends, God knows I need those. Hopefully, this chap was worth the wait. Also, I made a poster for this on the main masterlist so check that out, it might be foreshadowing dome plot.

Warning: Eventual Non-Con, Sickening Threats, Mob Themes, Violence, Death, Manipulation, a mild mental breakdown, Cheap Tricks later.

Genres + Characters: Mob AU, Single Parents AU, Steve Rogers x Reader.

Summary: Steve can't ever repay you for what you did. After meeting you, Steve believes his broken family is the missing piece in the puzzle of your own wrecked one. Indebting the crime lord to you has been the biggest mistake of your life, cause now you can't get rid of him, no matter what. Loyalty and favours go a long way in the mob.

Chapter 2: Just My Type

It had almost been a week since the incident and you had barely gotten a wink of sleep. When you drove back to your house that night, Steve surprisingly didn’t argue as you had expected. After that friend of his whispered something in his ears, you only assumed he was needed elsewhere and you couldn’t be more thankful for that. They escorted you to your car and Steve thanked you with a strained smile, words genuine but eyes calculating. You didn’t even wonder what went inside his head. You were thankful for the peace and quiet of your own car, content to just get out of the area and into your humble abode.

After you put the already asleep Grace to bed, you couldn’t bring yourself to get out of her room. You just sat on the floor beside the bed, hand intertwined with hers as you rested your head beside her tummy on the mattress.

Your adrenaline wore off and your limbs ached as your thoughts finally settled into place, the gravity of the catastrophe a few hours prior hitting you. Tears made their way down your cheeks as you realized that you both could have very well died tonight.

One bullet could have sealed each of your lives and you were basically defenseless had Steve not saved you against the creeping assaulter. You couldn’t commend yourself for even defending yourself against one attacker, the guilt of killing someone harboring in your tired head. Your quiet whimpers eventually wore you out, while Grace’s shallow breaths lulled you to sleep.

You didn’t manage to sleep for long though, every time your eyes closed, horrific images flashed in your mind. A blood curdling scream here, heaps of dead bodies there, with distant exploding sounds all around. You could see men clad in black holding guns to Grace’s head and whensoever you woke up, you just wondered how much more creative your mind could get, making these visuals so realistic.

When 8 AM rolled in, you didn’t wake Grace up even though it was Monday and you had work. You got up, changed into a long tee after a shower and called your office and then her daycare. You knew you would have a hard time going back to your normal life, to become trusting enough to leave her alone.

Your assumption about yourself was right. You took almost the entire week off, which your boss generously allowed you to after hearing your traumatic experience, which soon made the city news headlines. All your colleagues checked on you, almost once in the five day break you took, and sweetly enough offered to bring you anything you needed.

It was kind of them, but none of them could bring you what your heart genuinely craved: peace and assurance that you and Grace would be safe.

Even though Saturdays were off, you did go to work to see what you missed and where to start on again. You went in because you knew that the random spurt of resolution you got in the bathroom to collect your life, wouldn’t last.

To ease back into your normal life, you gathered your guts, called a babysitter and left home. You couldn’t bring yourself to leave Grace at the daycare just yet. One of your good friends offered to come in to the office and help you, even on the weekend and you were quite grateful to him.

When you both decided to take lunch in the nearby dining place, you both got to talking, the conversation obviously originating from ‘How have you been?’ and ‘Is Grace okay?’. You reminisced about how you used a photobooth to hide, grotesquely and uncomfortably chuckling when you remembered Sarah calling you her mom and how her dad saved you all.

You deliberately left the part where you killed someone and Steve shot someone too. You hadn’t come to terms with it yet and you stiffly restricted your mind whenever it tried to go down that lane.

He sensed how the conversation was becoming tense and distressing for you and briskly redirected the topic.

“I hope the dad was hot though?” He wiggled his eyes creepily and you snorted at his vulgarity, light for the first time in days.

“He was easy on the eyes; I will admit that.” You played along, recalling your girlfriends and how you used to ogle people.

“Don’t be a homewrecker though, I don’t support cheating.” He said nonchalantly, checking his phone as a notification bell rang off.

“He’s a widower.”

His eyes snapped up and met yours as his head tilted in confusion. “That’s a strange fact to know about someone you met for a few minutes.”

Steve’s even stranger comment about his dead wife popped in your mind and before you could stop yourself, you blurted that out as well.

“He even said and I quote, ‘She deserved what she got.’” He put his phone down, weirdly amused.

“Ooh Creepy! Do you think he is one of those husbands who kill their wives and bury them in the backyard? The podcasts always say that the psychopaths are visually handsome and charming. And his statement was quite vague and spooky.” He continued munching, and you felt that now Aiden was really paying attention unlike before.

“Steve did have a gun while searching for Sarah, come to think of it.” You drank your tea and awaited his response. What you did not expect was his eyes to widen and worry to cloud his features.

“Um Widower Steve with a toddler Sarah? At the place where The Vices attacked?” He mumbled, grabbing his phone and doing God knows what on it. Your eyebrows furrowed and before you could ask him what was up with his antics, he resumed.

“This is a long shot but I really hope your Steve didn’t look like this.” He positioned the phone in your vision, and you could already tell it was Steve by the sapphire blue of his eyes piercing through the screen into your soul. The picture was a month or two old, his hair was much longer when you met him than in the photo.

“This is him.” Your eyes met Aiden’s and worry visibly took over his features as his forehead creased and jaw tense.

He looked around the restaurant, finding it empty in the afternoon. He leaned and whispered, “This Steve of yours is dangerous.”

You interrupted Aiden, even though you already knew Steve was, the sight of his armed men still fresh in your head, and inquired, “Why do you say so?”

“It’s just like the fictional stories we hear from our parents, except here, in this city of ours, every myth holds true. There are really powerful men, untouchable by law, who reign the city silently and live luxuriously. Every shady, under the table deal you’ve heard of, transpires. Illegal trades, fraud schemes and bounty hunters are not fictional, they exist here. These men kill whatever hinders them and trust me, you don’t want to be the deer caught in their Jaguar’s headlights.”

Ice froze in your veins again, resembling the fear you felt that night but now because of your deemed ‘savior’. You convinced yourself that you had not wronged him in any way, instead had saved his daughter’s life.

“Are you in contact with him? If you are, distance yourself cleverly, don't block him immediately.”

“No, we just parted ways near my car, he thanked me for Sarah and was called away. It’s almost been a week and he hasn’t reached out if that’s what you mean. We didn’t exchange contacts and I don’t think I even told him my full name.” You explained yourself as if you were on the witness stand in court, trying to convince yourself more than Aiden.

“Pray that he doesn’t remember you more than that, if at all. I’m being totally honest here in telling you this, I’m genuinely worried for you and Grace. You are smart but he is powerful. He has unimaginable resources and if you become more than a speck of dust on his windshield, you are screwed. There is no exaggeration here.” You took his words to your heart and swore to be careful, if not for yourself then for Grace.

The rest of the day went by and you found yourself dwelling on and worrying about Aiden’s words. At least he put it out there as it was. Heeding his advice, you did google Steve on your phone, finally finding him in the topmost news headline when you added ‘Buck’ in the search bar as well.

‘With 38 lawsuits pending against businessman Steve Rogers, the filers have lost all hope in prosecuting him. All cases are being drawn out for indefinite periods of time by the Chief Justice Bruce……’

Aiden was right.

Businessmen was code for illegal mob heads. Cases being stretched on meant he was, in fact, invincible, at least to the common man’s fists.

You flickered through several titles, each one more surprising than the last. He was believed to be involved in the carnival attack, alleged for three hit and run cases that he didn’t lose but the witnesses swore they saw him driving and was also rumored to have brought in quintals of drugs just last week, but the packets just evaporated into thin air and there was no proof of their existence in the first place even on incessant searching.

Every crime of his made you shudder and you mentally thanked Aiden for pulling you out of your oblivion. Your mind raced and heart palpated and you cursed yourself for being so drastically unaware even after living here for almost four years. Technically speaking, Steve and you were even, him saving your life and you saving his daughter’s. No logical reason came to your mind for him contacting you ever.

You wished as Aiden said and assured yourself that your paths would never cross again, Steve not having reached out in a week, so hopefully never again.

That thought went out the window when you reached home to find a box awaiting you. Hannah, the babysitter you had called, informed you it came around 5 in the evening and was exclusively to be opened by you today.

Your mind raced as you paid the babysitter, your hands sweaty as you tried not to think about the gift and its sender. There was an apparently clear answer to who mailed it but you refused to accept that, courtesy of Aiden.

The box was of the height of Grace, it was black with red hearts painted across it; some red roses also sparingly adorned it. You opened the lid and found tons of red tissues and a multi-flower bouquet adorned with mostly red roses and a few purple and pink flowers.

Because of your frequent gardening in your backyard, you knew all the flowers’ meanings. To sum it all up, red flowers, especially roses were used for courting someone. Pink meant admiration, purple for beauty and you knew the ‘violet’ flowers were for loyalty.

As your nerves increased tenfold, you willed yourself to get it over with and empty out the box first, ignoring the little card in your bouquet, saving the ‘best’ for last. You find a mini bouquet inside but unlike yours, it had chocolates of every kind. You did read its card and cringed when it was for Grace, bothered not by the deed but by the doer.

Further inside were some animal plushies, face masks, perfumes, scented body lotions and shampoos. Your head hurt thinking about the ‘single mother care package’ delivered to you by someone you refused to acknowledge.

As Grace sat in her playpen occupied, you dared to pick your card and read its message, your heart beating unrealistically fast for someone who refused to accept the cruciality of her situation.

I can’t thank you enough in this lifetime for saving my little princess. The gift of your help is more than anything money could ever buy for me. Please accept this invitation of mine for dinner tomorrow night, 7PM at La Bonne Nuit, as a symbol of my sincere gratitude for everything you’ve done. I’ll gets the kids covered and pick you up, you just be ready and look as amazing you always do. Sincerely, Steve Rogers

You stilled as you read it over and over again.

An invitation, your ass. Even in writing his authority portrayed, there was no question and hope for you coming, he just stated that you’d come. Looking pretty as always? You just met him once, in the middle of a calamity, covered in dirt and blood.

All the red roses and gifts screamed his romantic interest but you illusioned yourself into thinking they meant gratitude. You wouldn’t be able to digest it all otherwise.

Knowing what you knew now about Steve, you understood there was no denying the dinner tomorrow. You had to get out of his clutches and distance yourself, but as Aiden had so rightfully said, cleverly.

That night you laid in bed mulling over your next course of actions. You had called the gift shop to return the unwarranted presents you received but they said it was non refundable and anonymous to trace. You bitterly snorted in their face, they put a card with Steve’s name on it for heaven’s sake!

You didn’t flinch even when you realized you never gave Steve your address, neither for mailing stuff nor for picking you up. There was no number given to call him and thank or to call him and deny. The bastard had planned it all out, and you felt like you were driving in a one way lane, going deeper into the tunnel. Somewhere among your all-relentless fretting, you managed to finally sleep.

When the doorbell rang, your eyebrows furrowed. It was just 6 PM and you weren’t expecting anybody else except for Steve. You had already begun getting ready, having developed a habit of keeping an extra margin of time now having a toddler. You still had to assemble Grace’s essential backpack, fill it with her meds and bottles.

While still putting on your diamond earring, you made your way to the door, unlocking it to find a redhead grinning at you. Before you could interact with her, a small body clung to your legs and you looked down to find the azure eyed kid that put you in this mess, Sarah, smiling up at you.

“Mama! You look pwetty!” She looked up in awe and now aware that she didn’t have a mother, you were even more so coerced into accepting this title rather than telling the kid that 'you are semi orphaned'.

“I’m Wanda, Sarah’s nanny. Mr. Rogers told me to pick her friend, Grace, up for the night?” So, this was what Steve meant. Bringing Sarah was proof enough of her legitimacy, but behind her you saw ‘Buck’ salute you from the driver’s seat of the black car. One of these days, you needed to learn his real name.

You invited Wanda inside and Sarah ran to Grace immediately, grabbing and whining while asking Grace to give her some popcorn she was munching on, her fist generously full.

In your open plan kitchen, you grabbed two plastic bowls, filled them with each with the tub of popcorn that sat in the microwave and handed each toddler one, fortunately quietening Sarah. Sarah obeyed Grace, in first thanking you, their ‘mama’ and then following her to her open playpen.

You faced Wanda again who sat on a barstool and kept on beaming. If your annoyance at her amusement showed, she sure didn’t let it falter the smile.

“Mr. Rogers told me you’d worry about your daughter, but I assure you she’d be in more than capable hands.” All you could focus on was how self-reassured she was. “I’ve served him for almost two years, the last family I served, I was there for 8 years and before them, I was employed for 3. I know the general bedtime and snacks, all I need from you is information about her allergies.”

You nodded and told her about Grace, her meds and what all you packed. When you got to know that her family owned the daycare Grace went to, you were finally somewhat convinced. After seeing them off, it was about fifteen minutes later, that the devil disguised in Prada showed up at your door.

You grabbed your purse and your keys. Wiping your sweaty palms on your dress, you opened the door. Steve stood there, a smirk lodging on his handsome face. His blue, three-piece suit perfectly paired with his cerulean eyes was impressive to say the least.

He was dressed to kill, and it appeared as if you were his first victim.

As your eyes took him in from top to bottom, his did the same lazily, taking their time, resting at certain places for longer period than others.

“You look stunning.”

You knew you did. You wore one of your more expensive dresses when you found out La Bonne Nuit to be one of the few seven-star hotels in the country. In hindsight, if you’d have dressed worse, maybe he’d have left you alone.

“Thank you.”

“Shall we?” He offered you his hand and you obliged with your palm in his. Your other hand pulled the doorknob while you stepped out, all alarms already set-in place. He waited while you locked and put the keys in and when you were done, with a soft kiss along your knuckles, he pulled you along.

The act surprised you, your stomach turning and your gut wrenching and you wondered if you’d be able to process the food after all, with your upset digestive system.

Like a proper gentleman, he opened the door for you and when you settled, he took his position at the driver’s seat. The silence was painful for you, your overthinking finally filling ideas in your head that you avoided contemplating about all day, focusing on Grace.

He was relaxed though; his humming was proof enough.

Mid way through, your thoughts were rudely interrupted when a hand housed itself on your knee. You glanced to find Steve’s palm slightly rubbing your knee. If it was meant to be assuring, you certainly didn’t feel like it.

You frowned and looked up to Steve who still had the arrogant smirk on his face, eyes straight ahead on the road, giving no indication of his inappropriate touching.

You wanted to swat his hand away but a brainwave dashed through your head and a disturbing thought made you halt, that whether he carried guns to restaurants as well, since carnivals were no big deal.

You ignored his hand and continued looking outside, pretending to ignore it as well as he did. Your scowl was a huge giveaway though.

You didn’t know that, but when your eyes found their way out, his finally rested on your face, the smirk growing even more.

Thankfully, apart from the incongruous touching, the dinner went okay-ish. The food and wine were impeccable, perfect even, the restaurant on the hotel’s top floors was so picturesque. You tried to savor your one-time experience there, knowing you’d no way be able to come back there.

Well, you tried to relish as much as you could while your mind still sat there, wary of the human in front of you. If you’d ignore your journey here, Steve was nothing short of a true gentleman, often making you wonder if you had imagined his hand on you.

This ‘friendly’ date you were having was probably one of the best you have had, he had left no expenses. He appeared to be interested in your work, about your childhood and about Grace’s but you swiftly avoided his questions about her father. He was growing a tad bit too comfortable for your liking and you still refused to entertain the idea that this was a ‘date’ date.

When you were finally onto dessert, the last course of your meal, your table was shadowed by the broad frame of a brunette and his date. He clapped Steve’s shoulder and Steve rose to hug him, you awkwardly smiled.

“It’s been far too long since you’ve been here, Cap. Why don’t you and your gorgeous date stop by my penthouse for a bit? We could finally go over the papers you sent me, in person?” He winked, they discussed something more and then went away, his date bowing and trailing after him as well.

Steve claimed his seat again, and finally told you about the interrupter. “That was my good friend, Tony Stark, always in a hurry. I’ll introduce you to him when we meet him later.”

“I think I’ll be heading home; you need not worry about my introduction, I hardly think we’ll ever run into each other again.” His eyes narrowed and you clarified, “Me and Mr. Stark, I meant.”

That’s good, don’t associate yourself with more of his kind.

“He was so kind in inviting you though, it would be rude to refuse.”

“It’s already late, Steve. And I’ve never left Grace alone for a night yet. What if she’s antsy? What if she is bothered? What if she feels unsafe? She's only used to very few people, and after last week, I-” You had started the sentence hoping to use Grace as an excuse but every word of yours succeeded in making you more apprehensive.

The carnival night flashed in your mind, along with the nightmares and you started panicking even more. Your hands clammy, your dessert spoon fell in your lap as sought your phone in your purse, hoping to call Wanda for an update. You felt like a terrible mother, who left her child with a stranger, only a week after she suffered trauma, just to go on a date with a mobster.

Steve reached across the table and grabbed your fidgety hands and as you wriggled to get your hands free, he softly called your name. Voice stern but vocals gentle. Your blurry eyes snapped to meet his while he guided you to breathe deeply, in and out.

His firm hold convinced you to listen to him, you’d never free yourself of them otherwise.

When you had calmed a bit, he withdrew his hands and fetched his phone. Your thoughts slowed down, and you wondered if anyone here was judging you. Your little scene, mercifully, went unnoticed by the other affluent people dining here.

Steve handed you his phone where four colored frames rested, the screen showing you Grace and Sarah cuddled in a frilly, pink four poster where Wanda sat too, her lips moving.

The feed was live and the screen muted, both the toddlers’ eyes fluttering close slowly, on the bridge of sleep.

You handed the phone back to Steve and drank your water while he rubbed circles on the back of one of your hands. You never freaked out like you did right now, always collected and never giving into anxiety. What had happened to you?

Well, In your defense, you had never experienced a disaster either.

“The kids are safe; I’m never putting either of them in harm’s way ever again.”

Your mind did catch the plural in his statement but you promised yourself you would not let it get that far and continued drinking your water, emptying the entire glass.

“The HD image you just saw was by cameras Tony recently developed. His technology is amazing, I’ll take you to his lab sometime.” You appreciated his attempt to redirect the topic but you also focused on how tech-savvy his friends were as well.

You hummed and agreed, trying to be ambiguous with your answer.

When you finished your dessert, you hoped he’d forget about his ‘friend’ Tony but to no avail.

“His penthouse is two floors above. He owns this hotel as well in case you didn’t notice.” He led you to the elevator as you recalled the Starks Group logo you saw earlier sometime.

Some AI named Jarvis opened the elevator doors for you in the living room of Tony’s penthouse. It was even more magnificent than the restaurant earlier, the place illuminated by several hues of different colours. Steve chuckled and strung you along, introducing you to a ginger-head named Pepper, who was Tony’s date earlier and went to search for his acquaintance.

She offered you wine but you politely declined, opting for water instead. She brought your glass to you from the extravagant kitchen and you both sat on the barstool there instead of the living room. Too anxious to say the wrong thing, you stayed quiet until her voice filled the deafening silence.

“So, Steve almost never brings dates around. You two serious?” She questioned, leaning towards you, waiting for some gossip, no doubt.

“Oh no! We aren’t dating. He just invited me for a friendly dinner. We merely met the other week.” You deliberately left out the part where there was bombing by crime families and attack on the common man.

“Honey, in the mob life, you don’t just introduce random people to the fam.”

Oh, she wasn’t being shy about the whole mob ordeal. It seemed weird to hear it from her, since you and Steve hadn’t used the word yet. Maybe he figured you already knew considering the circumstances you met in or how famous he was.

“We really aren’t romantically involved. This dinner was just a gesture of gratitude if I’m being truthful.”

She chuckled, as if you were a kid making stories and quizzed, “Gratitude for what?”

You trapped yourself into that one. You didn’t know how to answer her and your brain downright blanked. Surprisingly,, Steve came to your rescue and two voices interposed your conversation.

Steve called your name and as you turned to the men, he continued, “She’s the one who saved Sarah the other night. You know the story, Wilson probably got it printed.”

“Impressive, really. Hey, I’m Tony and I see you’ve already met Pepper, my fiancée.” He shook your hand and kissed your knuckles, much like Steve did earlier in the day. You bowed, smiled and mumbled a ‘nice to meet you as well’. They escorted you to the elevator and Tony continued.

“Well, it’s not everyday Steve brings brave and extraordinarily attractive women around. Welcome to the family, sweetie. She’s a keeper, Cap.” He winked while saying the last sentence and before you could correct him, Steve ushered you inside the elevator, bro-hugging him. As the doors closed, Pepper winked at you from behind Tony and a shudder ran through you.

Okay you had to make it clear, get on the same page.

As the elevator music filled the silence, you started, “Steve, look we aren’t-”, “I served in the army, that’s why Tony calls me Cap, short for captain.” And crudely got interrupted.

“I never wanted to get into the army, I thought people were fools to sacrifice the one life they got. But I went to make my mother’s dream a reality, I really loved her, you know? Sarah is named after her, my mother.”

His voice broke at the end and as much as you wanted to redirect onto your former topic, you couldn’t. This amiability of yours would be the death of you.

“She died alone in her bed; I was dispatched too far away to even make it back for her funeral.” He mumbled but you heard him clear as a sunny day, and he leaned back onto the wall for support while you awkwardly rubbed his shoulder to return the support he provided earlier during your mental breakdown.

He closed his eyes and gathered himself, taking deep breaths. As the elevator dinged, his eyes opened and he gave you a strained smile.

The car ride to his mansion was painfully silent, his mind too sidetracked to focus on harassing you again. With all that you went through today, you almost forgot about that.

His mansion was enormous, twenty guards stood outside and even more patrolled the lawn. He took you inside his house, the interior even more detailed and scenic than Tony’s temporary residence.

You just concentrated on swiftly getting Grace and Uber-ing back. As Steve showed you earlier, Grace and Sarah hugged and slept and it was a meticulous task to untangle their limbs without waking either of them up andnd get Grace with her back-pack. You thanked Wanda on the way out, hoping to avoid Steve but somehow he stood outside before you, leaning on his sleek black car. He opened the door for you before you could refuse the ride. You settled with Grace in the backseat itself, trying to be smart.

He just summoned one of his guards to drive and sat alongside you in the back. You didn’t let the annoyance at his clinginess show though. You just focused on Grace who drooled over your shoulder.

Hopefully, there won’t be any point of exposure to him ever again, your circles didn’t match, both social and professional. Your Venn diagrams didn’t overlap anywhere. This should be reason enough to avoid meeting ever again.

He didn’t try anything even this ride around. You doubted it was hardly because of the toddler or because of the driver. He did as he pleased, if he wanted to he could very well grope you. Luckily, he wasn't in the mood.

When you reached your dwelling, you stepped out hastily, thanking him in a whisper. You fumbled to get your keys out, but since everything you held slowed you down, he caught up with you without even trying.

He took and held Grace’s bag while you drew the keys out, Grace still on your hip. He handed you the bag back, “So this is it, I guess?”

“Yeah, tonight was a total delight. Thanks for the dinner and everything, really.” You put up your best façade, hoping to convince him.

“It was, thanks to you. The company matters the most.”

You awkwardly chuckled and you sensed him leaning in, his eyes flickering shut. Your eyes closed as you turned your head to avoid him, so that his lips would peck your cheek.

They never came.

Your eyes opened to find his and he chuckled, leaning in once again swiftly, catching you off guard this time. He didn’t meet your lips though, he kissed the corner of your mouth, lips overlapping for a fraction of skin.

“In due time, baby.” He stepped back and strolled to his car leisurely, content in his own world.

You opened your door and slammed it shut, the peck feeling wrong on so many levels. It felt more sensual than a lover’s kiss, leaving room for intimacy and longing.

Your thoughts ran a hundred kilometers an hour, the most absurd but nauseatingly true being, this was a date and it was not your last encounter.

Steve smirked outside in his car, the dinner an absolute success in his opinion. Tonight just made him feel that you both were more than compatible for each other. You needing him during your mental breakdown, him relaxing under your shy touch, Tony’s approval, not that important though, and your anxiety for Grace was the best part, because he, more often than he’d like to admit, fussed about Sarah the same way, agonizing and fretting her well being.

A text lit up his black screen and his grin widened even more if possible.

‘The Stark cameras are up and working, Sir.’

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ignitedbynatsu · 3 years

Text

Little Devils

A/N: @exhaustedpotat0 I hope I exceeded your expectations 🤗. Fun fact about me; I get story ideas at the most random times during the day, like for example when I’m making chocolate milk, poof there is an idea I’ve been trying to come up with for days (yes I am 20, yes I still prefer chocolate milk above coffee, fight me 🥊). ANyWaz thank you for the request and support!

Warnings: near death experience I guess? Bribing if that’s a warning

Genre: fluff? Crack? Idk tbh

⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡

"It is time for the annual girls-day!" Cana announced as soon as she walked into the guild.

The Fairy Tail girls had picked a date and proclaimed it as the Fairy Queens off day. That day no girl of the guild would work a job or work at the guild itself. They'd all go out of town and enjoy a peaceful day at a resort.

It would be your first time since you had only recently joined the guild because Laxus had requested it. He proposed the idea since you were a bartender at a bar a couple of streets away. He didn't see the point when you could just work here in the guild alongside Mira-Jane. Everyone knew that the real reason was actually, so he could keep a close eye on you and making sure you were okay, but God forbid he'd ever say that out loud.

"I can't," you said as you separated your boys from fighting. Aidan and Keishi were the spitting images of their father. Both having the same blonde locks paired with two soft eyes matching yours.

"Why not?" Erza asked as she helped you.

"I can't leave the boys unattended" you explained as you picked up the crying child and placed him on your hip while Erza scolded the other.

"Let Laxus do it" Bisca shrugged her shoulder as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "Alzack did so with Romeo when he was still a child"

You bit the inside of your cheek as you let the suggestion sink in. Laxus had never cared for the children alone. You were always around, and if for some reason you had to go do something, one of the girls was always there to assist him.

"I don't know" you mumbled as your eyes landed on Laxus that was unbothered chatting with Freed and Bickslow.

"Come on, (Y/N). He'll be fine. He's their dad after all" Levy tried to persuade you.

"Oi! You girls still here? Shouldn't you be leaving for your annual girls day?" Natsu asked, ditching the argument he had with Gray just moments ago.

"That's the plan, but (Y/N) doesn't want to go because she isn't sure if she should leave the kids alone" Lucy explained.

Upon hearing the explanation, Laxus decided to stand up and join the conversation as well "they wouldn't be alone, they'll have me"

"Are you sure you'll be able to handle them?" You asked as you looked up at your significant other.

"Is that a challenge?" He shot back while raising an eyebrow in amusement.

"No! No, of course not. It's just... They can be a lot sometimes" you hurriedly explained at which a soft chuckle left his lips, followed by a kiss pressed against your head "I'll be fine"

"Then it's settled! Let's go!" Lisanna yelled as she linked her arm with her sister, basically dragging the older girl with her as she left the guild.

Erza grabbed your arm, refraining you from turning back "Call me if something happens! I'll be back as soon as I can! I love you!"

And with that all the women of Fairy Tail had left the guild, leaving only the men and children behind.

The first few hours flew by as if nothing had changed, the biggest adjustment being Mira-Jane or you not filling their cups when they were empty.

"I really don't understand what (Y/N) was making a big deal out of. This day has passed by swimmingly" Bickslow chuckled as he placed his foot on the table while leaning back in the chair. Normally you or Mira would've scolded him, but with neither of you being there, he thought he'd take advantage of it.

Karma was lurking around the corner, cause as soon as the words rolled off Bickslow's tongue, everything went South.

Your children started a competition to see who could climb the highest point in the guild. They were both a couple of feet in the air when the youngest slipped, losing all flooring underneath his feet.

Had it not been for Jet's speed, the fall would have been catastrophic. "Not a word to (Y/N) about this"

Laxus was desperately comforting Keishi who was inconsolable as he just saw his short life flash before his very own eyes. Meanwhile, Gray and Natsu were trying their hardest to get the eldest down.

"Aiden! Get down here!" Natsu ordered as he started climbing up as well. The child didn't listen, only climbing higher as he took notice of the struggling adult.

His laughter filled the guild, but that soon turned into screams as the Fire Dragon Slayer got hold of his leg. "No! Let go of me!"

Natsu succeeded in getting down safely along with Aiden that was now also crying uncontrollably, leaving Laxus with two very upset children.

"Mommy!" "I want mommy!" The two cried out for their mother that was unbeknownst to the situation, relaxing in a hot spring a couple of cities away.

Laxus held Keishi close, rocking him softly as his hand softly rubbed circles on his back. He had seen you do this countless times, so why did it seem so hard when he did it? Elfman held the oldest, copying Laxus as good as he could.

"Shouldn't we call (Y/N)?" Gray sighed, annoyance evident on his face as every attempt at trying to calm the boys down seemed to fail.

"No!" Laxus exclaimed, earning him even louder sobs from the young child in his arms. He shushed him before returning to Gray in a lower voice "(Y/N) doesn't think I can handle our children"

"I can see why" Natsu snickered, resulting in a murderous look from the father.

"Freed, can't you put them in like a soundproof box or something with your magic" Gajeel groaned at the loud wails that kept coming from your children.

"You will not do such a thing" Laxus snapped at Gajeel in a hushed tone, already learning from his previous mistakes "I will prove to (Y/N) that I'm perfectly capable of taking care of my boys. Otherwise, she'll never trust me with them again"

"We still have a couple of hours left until the girls come back. We could try bribing them with sweet, perhaps?" Freed suggested.

Everyone turned to look at the green-haired mage as if he was an angel that was sent from up above. "Why didn't you say so earlier!"

"Aidan, Keishi, if you stop crying we'll go get ice cream" Laxus tried and at the sound of the cold deliciousness, their crocodile tears slowly came to a halt.

"Can we have two flavors, daddy?" Keishi asked as he looked at his father with puppy dog eyes.

"No- yes, fine, you can have two flavors" Laxus quickly changed his answer as he saw tears forming back in the corner of his eyes. He knew you'd have his head if you found out. The two boys really turned into little nightmares if they had too much sugar.

"Yay! Let's go" Aidan exclaimed happily, wriggling in Elfman's arms, signalling that he wanted to be put on the ground.

Laxus let both his sons grab a hand as they guided him out of the guild and to the ice cream shop.

"Please don't come back!" Gajeel called after them as they stepped outside the guild, sighing happily at the thought of some peace and quietness.

"Alright, now boys, I need you to listen to daddy for a second" the dragon slayer crouched down to look at them on eye-level while the two carelessly licked away at the sweet dessert in their hands. "Mommy can't find out about today. It was a normal relaxing day without any problems, alright?"

"What's in it for us?" Aidan asked as he looked at his father, still eating the ice cream that had slightly melted on his hand.

"What the- there's nothing in it for you. I am your father" Laxus started but stopped when the boys shared an unimpressed look. For being only 3 and 4, the two definitely had an attitude. "Fine I'll each give you 5 bucks that you can spend in the candy shop"

"10" Keishi chimed in.

Laxus stood perplexed. Was he really negotiating with his own children? More importantly, how was he the one losing the negotiation? "Fine"

The elder mage did as promised, handing both boys their money to which they high-fived. "Let's go back, the girls are about to return home"

Not even 5 minutes later as the three arrived back at Fairy Tail, the girls had returned.

"Mommy!" The two children ran up to you once they caught a glimpse of your face "boys!"

Laxus walked up as well, giving you a soft peck on your lips, earnings fake gagging from Aidan and Keishi "boys that's enough. How did it go, baby?"

"Normal, not much out of the ordinary, right boys?" As on cue, your children nodded their head in agreement.

"Really? So I could leave you more often with the boys?" You eyed him suspiciously, already picking up on his small habit of twirling a strand of your hair between his fingers when he was nervous or lying.

"No! I mean, I think I should help you take care of them more regularly. I'm sorry for ditching you so often to sit with the guys" he apologized at which a small chuckle escape your lips.

You wondered what happened today, but decided not to press it. It will be a secret between all the men at Fairy Tail and you respected it, knowing very well one would slip up when they had a couple of beers too much "it's alright, and I would love that"

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jaskiersvalley · 3 years

Text

Shards of Ice

There was a lot of yelling in tags, reblogs and comments about Lambert needing to be loved following this post. You should have been more careful with what you wished for, because before things can get better, they need to get worse. But he gets his happy ending, don't worry.

CW: Suicidal thoughts

The room was cold and dusty but Lambert no longer had the energy to care. It was a room, his room, as barren as it was. He had survived trekking up to Kaer Morhen, at least he wouldn't be exposed to the elements so it was a bit better, even if there was no roaring fire. There wasn't even any wood in his room to start one. It would have to wait. Much like food could wait too, Lambert still had a few rations and some water in his pack, that would see him through the next couple of days while his leg finished healing. He so desperately wished he had something to take for it, even just a root to chew on for the pain but he'd run out of potions a while back and had been too caught in grief to even think about making more. At least he had a bed to lie on, that was better than the cold, hard forest floor. Lambert would take any small fortune as a blessing at that point.

Sleep claimed him and didn't release him until the sun was high the next day. Groggy, stiff from sleeping in his armour, and ravenous, Lambert pushed himself up. In the light of day his room looked no better, still just as empty and stale as when he'd walked in. If he could, he would have gone for a wash, anything to freshen up but his leg protested too much. In the end, he sat on the floor next to his bed, munching on a ration of cured meat, willing himself not to feel.

The others had to know he was back. He'd made enough noise, they probably even saw him approaching. But obviously he had no place in their lives. A dogsbody who was good for making their lives easier but didn't warrant anything in return. Not that Lambert did it to get something. But he'd always thought family looked after each other, took turns picking up the slack when one of them stumbled. As the day wore on and Lambert pulled his bedroll onto his bed for a bit of extra warmth, there was only one conclusion he could draw. While he had counted Geralt, Eskel and Vesemir as his family, they didn't think of him in a similar fashion.

On his own with his thoughts, Lambert had the chance to mull it all over. He had been a fool to think his fellow Witchers would consider him part of their family unit. Not even Lambert's own flesh and blood had done that. Just because Destiny threw them in the same cooking pot didn't mean were all part of the same cake. Though Aiden had been different. He had seen Lambert, all of him and decided that he was worth something. Desperate fury at the unfairness of it all had Lambert's lips wobbling even if tears were beyond him. He raged against his lot in life and the fact that the one possible good thing had been ripped from him. Nobody wanted Lambert and, when he found someone who did, they were violently snatched from his grasp.

With nothing do do but sleep and heal, Lambert didn't bother keeping track of the days. While his food and water lasted he would be okay. And when it ran out, he'd decide what he wanted then. Time stopped existing for Lambert, he was either asleep or wallowing in misery. It wasn't like anyone actually cared that his behaviour was very unbecoming of a Witcher, let alone a fully grown man. Lambert figured that if nobody wanted him at his best, it didn't matter what he was like at his worst.

A soft knock woke him from his slumber. It was better to sleep than get lost in his head. Why someone would try to take his only solace from him was beyond Lambert and he woke with a snarl. His leg still pulsed with pain, his room was still cold though he had managed to somewhat air it while the sun was high so it was maybe a little less chilly.

"Lambert?" Eskel's voice called as the door opened. "You missed breakfast again."

All Lambert heard was that he hadn't provided breakfast once again. He'd been back for probably a few days but soft foods and warm honey hadn't magically appeared on the breakfast table for the others. Well, it served them right.

"Go away!" He growled low in his throat.

"I just wanted-"

"Fuck off!" Lambert didn't let Eskel finish. Whatever Eskel wanted, he could get for himself. "I don't want you! I don't need you! Just leave me the fuck alone!" He threw his gloves at the door, followed by his bracers which clanked loudly against the wood, barely missing Eskel's face.

For the first time in his life, Lambert got what he asked for. The door closed again and he was alone. A strangled scream mixed with a sob in his throat and he curled up on the bed, heart and chest aching worse than his leg.

Time had no meaning, Lambert stayed curled up under his blanket, eyes open but not seeing. He'd had enough. Enough pain, enough rejection, enough loneliness. His rations were dwindling but he couldn't even find it in himself to finish them off. There was no point, it would only prolong his suffering.

Another soft knock on his door but he didn't even bother acknowledging it. He was done, the others could get on with their happy little family, they didn't need Lambert in any capacity, that had become obvious in the last few days.

The door opened and Eskel stepped in, an armful of logs and a bag of kindling in hand. He didn't say anything but got a fire going and left. The warmth of the room didn't reach Lambert's heart. He stayed where he was, even when Vesemir stepped in, a bucket of steaming water and a couple of wash cloths. Lambert didn't even have it in him to growl when hands methodically stripped him and wiped the worst of the Path's grime from his body. Fingers deftly worked the bandage on his leg open and, like when Lambert was a kid who'd scraped his knee, the injury got tutted over. Vesemir left and Lambert wondered whether he was such a disappointment that the fact he couldn't even heal from a simple bite had sent the man he'd once considered his father figure turning away in disgust.

For some reason Vesemir was back with a tray. It smelled like medical supplies but Lambert couldn't understand why. Firm hands worked over his leg, cleaning out the wounds, wrapping them. Finally, a vial was tipped against Lambert's lips and he swallowed, hoping it was poison to put him out of his misery. He fell asleep with the sweet bitterness of the potion still on his tongue and decided that maybe this wasn't such a bad way to go.

Unfortunately he woke up again. This time Geralt was in his room, a bowl of broth warming by the hearth. Lambert finally found his words.

"What the fuck do you want?"

He pretended not to see the way Geralt flinched and looked away. It filled him with a sense of perverse satisfaction, knowing that he repulsed his, well, Geralt wasn't his brother, not anymore. Not that he ever was actually.

"Eat," Geralt said, grabbing the warm bowl and holding it up. When Lambert made no move to take it, he fiddled with the spoon. "I can help feed you if you need."

Growling, Lambert snatched the bowl, ignoring the way it was so hot his fingers almost burned. The broth was good, seasoned with his favourites, not that the others would know, they never bothered to ask him. Still, it slid down his throat and warmed his belly, so close to his still stone cold heart.

Anger bubbled in Lambert's chest. The others couldn't even leave him be to make a dignified exit from this world. For some cursed reason now was the time they decided to bring Lambert back, even as he fought tooth and nail to be left. From then on, Lambert never woke alone. There was always someone in his room, never once commenting on his nightmares. Maybe they didn't notice, or thought it was just Lambert's regular dreams.

"Who is Aiden?" Eskel asked one night when Lambert woke, heart in his throat. "You call out for him a lot."

It wasn't something Lambert wanted to answer. He didn't want to trust Eskel with Aiden's memory. It wasn't something he had earned. However, each time Eskel was there and Lambert awoke from a fresh nightmare, he was asked the same question. There was only so many times that Lambert could hear those words before he snapped. At first it was just a gruff "nobody" then a "none of your business" to "a friend". It went on and on like that until Eskel had the full story, with Lambert held close to his chest and shaking like a new born foal.

When Lambert finally left his room, it was with Geralt hot on his heels. Something told Lambert that he knew about Aiden too. Those suspicions were only confirmed when, in the kitchen, Geralt casually said, "I'll come with you in the spring. We'll avenge him."

By the time spring came round, Lambert didn't feel quite so hollow. His heart had started to thaw out but the clump of ice that sat heavy in his chest could barely be called a heart anymore. Over the winter he'd been shown what it could have been like to be part of a family, to be wanted but he couldn't quite connect with the others anymore. The trust he'd offered had been twisted and warped until it was nothing more than a burnt silhouette of what it had once been.

Lambert was no fool. He knew Geralt travelled with him not just for revenge but also for Lambert's safety. It wasn't like Lambert was going to throw himself at the first chort he found. That was not how he wanted to go. But the others didn't care to listen to him in that respect. In a way, nothing had changed in that regard. Lambert's voice was still one to be ignored.

Winter came round quicker than expected. Lambert and Geralt turned north to Kaer Morhen and trekked up the mountain. There was smoke meandering through the air from the fires that had already been lit. It wasn't the Lambert had wanted to come back but he had nowhere else to go either. At least in the old keep he could actually survive winter in relative safety.

"Welcome home boys," Vesemir said as he stepped out the greet them, hugging Lambert first, then Geralt. "Eskel is already home and he's brought a guest with him."

Distantly, Lambert wondered how Geralt would react to Eskel having a guest. And maybe he was a little jealous that Eskel, despite his scars and menacing build, could find someone to winter with so easily. There was only one person Lambert had ever considered inviting home but that had only been a fleeting hope of the past, Destiny had made sure to quash it without hesitation.

"Lamb?" A familiar voice called and Lambert's whole chest hurt. His mind was cruel to play such games, taunting him with the one thing he couldn't have. "Lambert!"

A body barrelled into Lambert, arms wrapping around him tightly. Lips pressed against Lambert's and he tried to see who was stupid enough to mess around with him like that. It wasn't Eskel, his arms felt heavier around him. Eyes open for the kiss, Lambert saw an eyepatch and, as his assailant pulled away, a familiar green eye.

"Aiden." The word was a broken whisper of hope and disbelief. Lambert's hands cupped Aiden's cheeks, held him in place to be inspected, admired and committed to memory. "I thought you'd died. I'd avenged you."

"You're a real darling, thank you for that." Aiden smiled and placed his hands over Lambert's, warm palms holding glove covered ones in place. "But, by some twist of fate, I survived, more or less intact. Took a while to recover, Eskel found me in some remote temple, being healed by some monks. Dragged me back here as soon as I was able to make the journey."

Hands slipping from Aiden's face, Lambert pulled him in for a tight hug, eyes squeezed shut tight. He let Aiden go but only as far as keeping an arm wrapped around his waist. From where he stood, he looked over to the other three Wolves, standing together and watching them. Maybe, just maybe, they were more of a family than Lambert had dared hope. He wasn't certain yet, needed more time to accept that. But, for the first time in a long time, he had he spark of hope flickering in his heart.

#lambden #minor geralt/eskel #lambert #eskel #geralt of rivia #vesemir #aiden #cw: suicidal thoughts #tldr: lambert loses all hope before it comes back

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skycollides · 3 years

Text

They Can Never Have Yesterday

Billy Russo x Reader

Authors note: I apologize in advance for grammar mistakes

English isn’t my native language.

Let me know if you want to be tagged.

Requests are open. Feel free to send them in.

Song: Yesterday by Leona Lewis

Warning: mentions of death, guns, shooting, heartbreak, swearing, no happy end

Words: 2.182

If anyone told you about 1 and a half year ago it would come down to this - you would have thought the person absolutely crazy.

Here you are in your apartment, pointing a gun on the love of your life. The guy you thought you would spend the rest of your life with.

’’Leave Billy. I thought I was clear when I told you I want you to leave me alone.’’ you say with a firm voice trying not to show him how much he scares you.

’’Y/n.’’ Billy says and takes a step forward which causes you to take a step back.

’’Stay where you are or I’ll shoot you. I will kill you if I have to William.’’

’’Let me explain darling.’’

’’What is there to explain? All of this is your fault. Yours and no.one else’s. You got Maria and the kids killed. They were our family Billy. How could you? I don’t even know who you are anymore or how far you’ll go for money. Am I next? Will you get me killed to or will you kill me yourself?’’ tears are welling up in your eyes but you try to hide them.

’’They weren’t meant to die. Frank should be the one dead not Maria and the kids. I did it for us. For our future, to be able to take care of you. You and me against the world Y/n. I would never hurt you.’’

’’Never hurt me? You hurt me more than you’ll ever know. For us are you out of your mind? I was with you before the money and guess what? I loved you for the man you were back then. I don’t need all this fancy stuff to be happy. All I needed was you and your love but I guess that was too much to ask for. You became a selfish prick that only cares about himself, money and status. I wish I’d never met you Russo. You’re a monster.’’

’’Don’t say that baby. I’m still the man you love.’’

’’Don’t call me that! I don’t wanna hear you call me that ever again.’’

’’Why?’’

’’Because that’s what you most likely called Madani.’’ Billy stares at you with wide eyes.

’’What don’t look at me like that. Did you seriously think I wouldn’t find out? Oh Billy you’ve got so much to learn. First of all when you lie to someone make sure all parties are on board. Second you shouldn’t have gone to places where me and my friends hangout. I’ve seen you with her all cozy and so did my friends so don’t even try to deny it.’’

’’Babe please take the gun down. I’ll explain everything.’’

’’So you can kill me and throw my body in the Hudson River? No thank you. It’s fine the way it is.’’

’’You really think I could do that the love of my life?.’’

’’As I was saying before you let our family get killed. I’m not sure what you’re capable of right now.’’ you say and now the tears are streaming down you face.

’’Y/n , my sweet Y/n.’’ Billy says and comes closer which you don’t realize because you’re trying to whip the tears away. Billy uses your inattentive moment to take you to slap the gun out of your hand. It slides over the floor and stops right under your couch. You look at hime with wide eyes and try to get away from him. He runs after you and grabs you from behind carrying you to the bedroom the both of you used to share. Once you’re inside the locks the door and put the key in his pocket. You scream and kick and try to get out of his hold but it’s useless. Billy drops you on the bed and you move back against the wall, pulling your knees up to your chest. He sits down on what used to be his side and gives you a sad smile.

’’I meant what I said earlier Y/n. I won’t hurt you. Not now and not in the future.’’ he says with a calm voice. You don’t say anything you simply out your head on your knees and hope he will leave soon. Leave without finding out the secret that you’ve been keeping from him.

’’Talk to me my love.’’

’’What do you want me to say Russo? Hey I know you’re a murderer but fuck it lets get married run away and play happy family. I don’t know if you’ve noticed but you’re wanted. Everyone is looking for you.’’

’’That’s quite the idea you’ve got there.’’ he says and get off the bed lays on the floor and get out a small carton. He opens it and pulls something out. A small velvet box. He hands it you and you open the box. Inside there is the most beautiful ring you’ve ever seen.

’’That’s the ring I was gonna propose to you with. Well before all the shit went down. I was serious when I said that you’re the one for me. Madani was using me to get to Frank and I was using her to get the information I needed nothing more. There were no feelings involved form my side. You were always on my mind Y/n. Ever since I met you 8 years ago it was always you that’s been on my mind no one else. I would die for you Y/n. I would die before I would let anything happen to you. I love you Y/n. I love you like I’ve never loved anyone before. I know I lied to you a lot in the past but saying that I love you was never one of them.’’ his speech is interrupted by a crying baby.

Your eyes go wide. This was the one thing you’ve been trying for hide since he showed up.

’’Y/n what is this?’’ he asks confused and gets off the bed heading to the bedroom door unlocking it. You jump off the bed and go after him. When you reach him he is already in your sons room staring in front of the bed.

’’Don’t hurt him please.’’ you plead.

’’Y/n come on who do think I am? Who’s kid is this?’’ he asks stares at you.

’’Ours Billy. This is our son.’’ you say and take the crying infant rocking him in your arms.

’’How? What? When?’’

’’You know how Billy or do you need a lecture about bees and flowers? When I found out? The day you and Frank were trying to kill each other. I was already 12 weeks along. I kept it secret too scared that someone would come after him because his dad fucked up peoples lives. Any other questions?’’ you say to him with an eyebrow raised.

’’What’s his name?’’

’’Aiden - Aiden William Russo.’’

’’Why? After everything I did to you - to us.’’

’’Because when I look at hime I remember all the good times we had. The love we shared. Aiden is a product of our love. I felt right to name him after his dad.’’

’’Can I hold him?’’ he asks and you look at him.

’’Please Y/n?’’ he begs and you give in. You hand him your son and he sits down in the rocking chair next to the bed.

’’Hey Buddy.’’ he says softly and kisses his forehead.

’’God he’s so beautiful Y/n.’’ he says and smiles. You can’t remember the last time you’ve seen him smile like this.

’’You did so well princess. I’m sorry I wasn’t there to take care of you two. I never imagined it would be like this when we have a child. I always thought we’d be living happily together. Why am I such a fuck up honestly?’’ he says to himself but you heard it too.

’’You thought about us having children?’’ you ask him surprised. In your eyes you’ve never seen Billy as a family man, this is completely new for you.

’’Didn’t expect that to be honest.’’

’’What’’

’’You wanting to have a family with me. Wanting me to be the mother of your children.’’

’’I’ve pictured it so often Y/n you have no idea.’’ he says and the little one stirs in his arms.

’’Shhh daddy’s here you’re safe. Nothing is gonna happen buddy.’’ Billy says and the baby calms down again. You look at the two of them for a while before you speak up.

’’Just because I’m not pointing the gun at you right now and you have our son in your arms I forgot what you did Billy. We will never have what we used to have before all the shit went down. I don’t think I’ll be able to trust you again. I don’t know who you are anymore. Hell I was scared you’d hurt our son. That’s what you actions caused.’’

’’We can make this work Y/n’’ Billy says and you shake your head.

’’I think Frank hit your head in this mirror too often. William you are wanted! The police is out looking for you. The CIA, FBI I wouldn’t even surprised if homeland was involved. Leaving my trust issues out of this right know- How the hell would this work in any way?’’

’’I have a fake passport and I set up a bank account I had it already planed before shit went south. The original plan was to kill Frank, take you and get the hell out of here. We still can do that. Get out of here and raise our son - together. I know I haven’t given you any reason to trust me lately but I all I want - all I ever wanted was to be with you. You’re my source of happiness Y/n and now this little one here too.’’

’’I don’t know that to say Billy’’

’’I’m not forcing you to say anything at all. I just want you to consider it.’’

You don’t know what to do. On one hand he’s the love of your life, the father of your child and on the other hand he’s a murderer who is responsible for the death of the castles and many other people.

’’Okay’’ you say.

’’Okay what?’’

’’Okay we’ll come with you but I swear to god if you hurt me in any way I’ll kill you in your sleep and make it look like an accident. I’m not kidding!’’

’’That’s my girl’’ he says and smile before he gets up and hand you your son. He kisses your forehead and says

’’I’ll take care of everything pack only necessary things for you and our son. I’ll come and get you when everything is set okay?’’ he says and you nod.

’’See you then my love. Bye Aiden daddy’s gonna come and get you soon. I love you buddy’’ he says and kisses his tiny hand before he leave the room.

’’Lock the door behind me sweetheart. I’ll reach out to you tonight. I love you Y/n!’’

’’I love you too.’’ you say and hear your front door close.

You put the baby in his bed and do as Billy advised you. After that you look for your gun under the couch and get it out before putting it back to its place. Then you go and start packing for the day Billy is going to come to get you and Aiden. Once you’re done you take a seat on the couch and wait. Wait for a new beginning with Billy and your son, as a family.

Little did you know that this day won’t come. Not tomorrow, not the day after tomorrow, never. Why? because Frank Castle killed Billy Russo as soon as he made it to the place where he was hiding ever since he escaped. He died knowing that the woman he loved, loved him too. She loved him enough to look past his mistakes and have a future with him. He died knowing that his son will have a wonderful mother to raise him and that she will make sure that Aiden will know that his father loved him from the moment he met him.

They can take tomorrow and the plans we made

They can take the music that we never play

They can take the future we’ll never know

They can take all the places we said we will go

All the broken dreams take everything

Just take it away

They can never have yesterday.

This is the song you chose for the funeral. The funeral no one attended except for you and your son. This pretty much summed up what Frank Castle took away from you that day, from you and little Aiden. Now you’re staying here staring at the tombstone thinking about all the days you and Billy shared.

’’Rest easy my love.’’ you say and kiss your fingertips before pressing them to the tombstone. You put Aiden back in the baby stroller and leave. Leaving the love of your life behind in the cold.

Taglist:

@justatiredfool

@artemisausten

#ben barnes #billy russo #billy russo x reader #billy russo imagine #Marvel The Punisher

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butgilinsky · 4 years

Text

the folder // rc

warning; a LOT of language, angst and not proofread but i think that’s it

summary; when the pogues bring you a folder of accusatory evidence, you’re left to believe that rafe has betrayed you in the worst way possible

word count; almost 4k

requested by a nonnie; Hey bby if you still take request can I request a rafe camero one where you think he’s cheating on you and he gets hurt that you think that

you didn’t know how to describe it. how do you describe the feeling you get when you’re positive you’re in the middle of feeling the biggest betrayal a person can feel? how do you look at your friends, who are all staring at you in anticipation, and tell them that your entire world felt like it was falling apart.

you looked better than they expected originally. they expected you to lash out, screaming and crying until you physically ran out of breath. they expected to have to hold you back from throwing yourself into unhealthy habits. they figured you’d throw things or lunge for your phone.

you didn’t do any of that. you sat in your spot, lips slightly parted in shock while your eyes glossed over. with your eyes blown big and wide and filled with confusion, you flipped through the stack of evidence in front of you. pictures, text messages, anything to get you to understand that you had given yourself to a man who did not respect you.

a man who, supposedly, had been sneaking around your back. a man you thought you knew since you were the ripe age of 8 years old.

you remembered moving to the outer banks. your first day on the island was intimidating. you had your hand wrapped tightly around your oldest brother’s, gripping onto his for dear life. the boy laughed down at you, using your eight year age difference to install some sort of comfort in you.

you didn’t do well with change, and you were stuck in the middle of an endless loop of it. your mom walking out hadn’t been the biggest shock to any of your brothers, or your father, but you had no idea it was going to happen. sure, she hadn’t been around a lot anyways, but now she was permanently leaving, and your eight year old self didn’t know how to handle it.

on top of it all, you were now standing in an entirely new state, across the entire country, on an island you’d never heard of before. all you had know were your brothers and your dad. your three older brothers that would have built a forcefield around you if they had to.

it wasn’t a surprise to any of your brothers that the first friend you made was a boy around your age. only two years older than you and seemingly nice at the time, rafe cameron was the perfect person to help you make the transition from arizona to the outer banks.

you fell into his life like clock work. you were friendly with his friends, though as you grew older, you disliked them more and more. you weren’t the biggest fan of rafe’s friends, and it pushed you straight into the embrace of the pogues, which came as an earth shattering shock to rafe when you were only 14 years old, and he was 16.

hanging out with the pogues had little effect on your relationship with rafe. you were his best friend, the only one that helped him when things at home got unbearable. he wasn’t going to throw you away just because you didn’t like his friends. half of the time, he hated his friends too. you were the only person that rafe cameron found himself truly caring about.

you had been friends for over ten years at this point, and had finally built up the nerve to tell him that you were utterly in love with him a less than a year ago. it had been painfully obvious to everyone else on the island that you were in love with the cameron boy, but he somehow hadn’t picked up on it throughout the years. it seemed impossible to overlook such a thing, especially when he felt the same bubbly feeling in his chest every time he saw you.

it had all been a dream. a dream that you never could’ve imagined would ever happen when your eyes were wide open and you were fully conscious. you were convinced, up until now, that you were living in your own desired reality. having rafe by your side, in every single sense of the world, felt like the universe had heard your wishes and granted you with every single one of them.

until now, as your eyes scanned over every message and every text on the pages the pogues had brought you. you had tears in your eyes that slightly blurred your vision, but that hadn’t phased you until sarah knelt down in front of you slowly.

she had been appointed as the diffuser in this situation. she had been the last to know about the folder of evidence accusing her brother of awful things. she hadn’t believed it at first, wanting to fact check everything in the folder ten times over but everything she dug up pointed to the answer she wished she hadn’t found.

sarah’s hands landed on top of yours, slowly taking the pages out of your grip, with a little added effort, and placed them on the bed beside you. her hands fell back onto yours, that had been shaking so bad that john b had asked pope if they should be worried.

when the heyward boy shook his head gently and mumbled something along the lines of “normal...anxiety...shock”, kiara sat beside you. the two girls, one beside of you while the other stayed in front of you, wrapped their arms around you.

you felt it then, the wave that crashed over you. you had lost your breath quickly, clawing at your throat to regain some sense of normalcy within yourself. you felt like everything had begun crashing around you. you wouldn’t have been surprised if the walls started shaking before the ground opened up and swallowed all of you whole.

eventually everything became too much. you pushed away sarah and kiara’s hands, not used to the overwhelming amount of physically attention you were receiving from everyone. you flinched every time a new hand fell onto your skin and immediately shoved it off of you, before shoving your friends away entirely.

“y/n-”

“please stop touching me.” you begged kiara after her consistent attempts to just hold you close. she knew you hadn’t been the most familiar with physical attention throughout your life, but you had let her console you before. she didn’t understand what was different this time around.

“y/n, how do we help you?” jj asked softly, not liking the idea of just watching you fall apart in front of all of them.

“i just want to be alone.”

they didn’t like that idea, didn’t like the thought of leaving you by yourself. the boys were confused but agreed quickly, which earned glares from both sarah and kiara quickly. kiara stood up and ushered the boys out of your room quickly, leaving sarah behind for just a moment.

she tried to ask if you were okay, to which you just told her than you needed to breath and process everything by yourself. she nodded, and with a final ‘text me if you need anything’ she left your room, shutting the door softly behind her.

she walked across the long hall to your youngest brother’s room, where two of the three boys you had grown up with sat in front of the TV, completely oblivious to everything outside of the room.

she knocked softly, knocking again once she didn’t get an answer from anyone. she pushed the door open when she heard the rushed ‘come in’, followed by both boys screaming at each other over their lost game.

“hey sare.” tyler, the youngest of the two smiled quickly once he caught sight of sarah. she’d always been tyler’s favorite of your friends.

“hey.” she offered a quick smile, one that didn’t reach her eyes, to both of the boys. “we’re all gonna head out, but keep an eye on y/n, please. she’s making us leave but i can tell she doesn’t want to be alone.”

just as sarah finished her sentence, the three heard a crashing sound from across the hall. tyler and brandon flew from their places on tyler’s bed and sprinted across the hallway, shoving the door to your room open.

you were mid toss, elbow cocked back and grip tight on the lamp that usually sat on your nightstand. brandon reached for the lamp just as tyler was wrapping his arms around your abdomen, lifting you off of the ground.

you were trying to fight back, trying to place your feet back onto the floor, but it had been useless. tyler had an easy five inches on you, so your feet weren’t going to reach the floor, not matter how far you stretched. his grip on you was tight, holding you against his chest as he tried to console you softly.

brandon got the rundown from sarah, eyes finding the folder that had been opened on your bed, pages spread across the top of it. he saw one picture, enough to tell him that he had to focus on his sister right now. he told sarah to go home, that y/n would be with her brothers for the rest of the day.

he didn’t let sarah leave without making sure she knew to tell rafe that he was in deep shit once they got y/n to calm down.

rafe got along with your brothers almost too well. tyler and him were the same age, which made it difficult for the two of them to not befriend one another. rafe was almost always at your house, and once the two of them had joined the same lacrosse team, it had been a done deal.

tyler did have you best interest at heart over rafe’s, but it had been slightly overshadowed by his friendship with rafe. brandon, however, was old enough to never have gotten close to rafe like tyler had. brandon had respect for rafe, but he had made it clear that you came before him in every single situation.

and then there was aidan, the oldest. aiden was the stereotypical older brother. he was the one that would have thrown himself in front of you if anything was coming towards you. he’s the one that checked in on you after your mom left. he was the one that had beent here for you after the move to the outer banks. he had been the only one at the time that was old enough to realize that what was happening to your family was not only happening to him, but all of his younger siblings as well.

aidan was the one that looked after everybody when your dad had to work late at the office, or couldn’t make dinner. aidan was the one that held everyone together. he was the only person that could talk you off of a ledge. he had been doing it for longer than either of you could remember.

but aidan wasn’t here, so that left this job up to tyler and brandon.

when you had stopped fighting against tyler’s grip, he let you go, noticing your relaxed muscles. just as he let go, your balance faltered, taking you down to your knees and then onto the floor entirely. you were a sobbing mess, worse than anything either of them had ever experienced.

it felt like hours had gone by before you stopped crying. you had fallen asleep, sandwiched between both boys that had stayed to offer their presence if you needed it. your tv had been flipped on at some point, playing a movie that brandon and tyler had both seen before.

“this scene is stupic.” brandon said absentmindedly, earning a scoff from tyler.

“you think it’s stupid because he dies.” brandon’s eyes blew wide open, preparing his defense just in the time for the doorbell to cut him off.

tyler jumped out of bed, slightly startled by the sound and hoping it hadn’t woken you up. when you stirred, but didn’t wake, brandon ushered the boy out of the room before it rang again.

“if it’s that prick, tell him to fuck off.” tyler rolled his eyes but assured his brother he would do so, though it wasn’t entirely true.

tyler ran down the stairs and to the front door before the bell could ring again, swinging the door open faster than he probably should have.

“hey ty.” rafe smiled, hand raising to slap against tyler’s instinctively.

“you probably shouldn’t be here.” tyler’s voice confused rafe, used to the tone but never having it directed towards him. he didn;t know what was going on, but he knew he needed to fix it before it got out of hand.

“what does that mean?” tyler looked over his shoulder at the sound of brandon walking around upstairs, popping up at the top of the stairs within seconds.

“you bitch.” rafe looked at brandon, who had fire in his eyes and clenched fists at his sides as he walked towards the front door.

“what the fuck is going on?” rafe took a step back when brandon popped up right behind tyler. tyler held brandon back, mumbling something about being too loud and causing a scene for no reason.

“not here, b.”

“that’s bullshit, ty. you’re blinded by your stupid hard on for this prick, but i’m not. i thought i made it clear to you, cameron. you fuck up, i ruin your life.” rafe was more lost than he had ever been before. he didn’t understand what they were talking about or why they were so mad at him. he didn’t even know brandon was home for the time being, thinking he had still been up in new york with his fiancee.

“fuck you, b, you know that’s bullshit.” tyler rolled his eyes until brandon punched his bicep, eyes wide and angry and directed towards his brother for the time being.

“can someone clue me in here?”

“well cameron, it seems that you’ve fucked up royally with our darling sister.” brandon turned towards rafe, his arms crossed and his chest puffed towards the younger boy.

“i don’t know what you’re talking about-”

“just say it, rafe. just fess up already and cut this denial shit. you cheated on her, and we want to know why.” rafe’s eyes blew wide open then, a sinking feeling in his chest while his heart rate picked up.

“you think i cheated on her? why the fuck would i do that?”

“that’s what i’m asking you, pretty boy.” tyler rolled his eyes at his brother’s insult, finding it ridiculous in a time like this.

“i would never do that to her. i’ve never done anything out of line-”

“cut this shit. you broke my sister’s heart, and now i’m going to break your nose, cameron.”

“brandon, cut it out-”

“no, fuck you, ty. let me punch this prick in the face-”

“if i cheated on her i would let you punch me in the face, brandon. but i didn’t do anything-”

“we saw the pictures, asshole! you’re lying through your fucking teeth and i-”

“ENOUGH!” all three boys turned towards the stairs where you were standing at the top, arms wrapped around yourself and hand flat against your temple. “it took me hours to fall asleep and you dickheads woke me up.”

“y/n, just go back to-”

“baby.” your eyes snapped over to him, your stomach betraying you when butterflies started flapping around inside of it. you felt your shoulders slump, instinct taking over as you melted in your place on top of the stairs.

“you shouldn’t be here, rafe.” your words broke his heart, cracking straight through the entirety of it. you had to believe him.

“baby, i don’t know what the fuck is going on but please let me clear my name-” rafe tried to take a step inside but brandon shoving his chest hard enough to keep him on the front porch kept him from doing so.

“brandon, lighten up on the toxic masculinity.” you rolled your eyes at his behavior, but he just scoffed in response.

“and let you fall for the shit he’s about to spew at you? not happening. go back upstairs and let me handle this.”

“nice try, b, but you can’t pull an aidan right now.” you noticed the way brandon’s fists clenched at the mention of him trying to fill his brother’s shoes. he hated when people compared him to aidan, and you knew that.

"fuck you, y/n. i’m just trying to fucking help you-”

“hey, don’t talk to her like that-”

“back off, rafe-”

“shove it, ty-”

“all of you shut the fuck up.” you screamed again, pressing both of your hands against your eyes and rubbing the area.

you walked down the stairs, ignoring the throbbing in your head for a moment. you pushed your brothers aside and stood in front of rafe, arms crossed over your chest.

he saw it then, how broke you were. your red rimmed eyes were ever so slightly puffy. your lips were chapped, cracking in places that told rafe you had been picking at them. your eyes were absent of the sparkle that they usually had when you were looking up at rafe.

“baby, i don’t know what’s going on but i would never-”

“there are pictures. i saw all of them. pictures and texts and-” you caught yourself getting choked up again, forcing it to the back of your mind while you coughed through the lump in your throat. “i think you should go.”

“no way. i’m telling you i’m innocent, y/n. i need you to believe me, y/n.” you shook your head softly, feeling your eyes fill with tears from the memories of the pictures resurfacing in your mind.

“i can’t just believe you, rafe. i saw everything.” rafe scoffed then, anger mixing with frustration.

“fuck that, y/n. you know me better than anyone else in my entire life. you think i would throw all of that away and for what? for a quick fuck? why would i do that, y/n? i’ve done that, i don’t care about that anymore. i just care about you, what makes it so hard for you to see that?” you were at a loss for words. it made sense that he was frustrated, but that didn’t change the fact that you had no reason to believe him over the evidence.

tyler and brandon had stepped away from the two of you. brandon stayed close by and tyler ran upstairs to grab the evidence folder, bringing back a stack of paper that he held out towards rafe.

rafe looked through the pictures, flipping through them faster than you had done hours earlier. his eyes blew wide at some of the pictures, and he laughed gently at others. you didn’t know how to take his reaction, you had no idea hat he was thinking.

“for starters, these pictures are old.” you rolled your eyes, opening your mouth to tell him to save that poor excuse for someone who’d fall for it, but he didn’t give you the time. “this is stacy reddington, i was 17. you see the belt i’m wearing? i lost it in the bahamas the summer before my senior year.”

you recalled a time when rafe called you, absolutely fuming after he had left that belt. you remembered him going straight to your house off of the tarmac, still high on the anger from losing his favorite belt.

rafe showed you another picture, one that had your gut wrenching and the lump in your throat building. “alice mooney. this was after midsummers two years ago, you can tell because i’m wearing the oxfords my dad bought when he was in england. you can tell because i never worn those disgusting shoes ever again.

“carrie park, night of graduation. i snuck off from the party early, remember? you were calling me and i apologized profusely about ditching you. you were mad at me for weeks after that.”

one by one, his explanations began to break down the lump in your throat and the awful feeling in your stomach. your nerves were unwinding and your tears were slowing down. he was disproving every picture and message you had gathered in the folder.

he didn’t know who made all of this shit up, but he wished they could see how easily he proved it all to be fake. he knew that you were more important to him than anything and everything else in his life. he would’ve done anything to keep you, and if it meant telling you every story behind every picture in front of your brothers, he was going to do that.

you had stopped him when he had only a handful left, reaching out your hand to stop him from flashing another picture in your face. the lump in your throat was no longer from the thought of rafe cheating on you, but instead the guilt that had found its way into your bloodstream.

“i believe you.” rafe felt the weight of the world lift off of his shoulders at the small promise. the promise that yes, you were still shaken up by all of it, but you knew he hadn’t cheated on you.

“baby, i swear to you that i would never dream of doing anything like that to you.” you nodded again, a small smile resting on your lips at the confession.

“i know.” his hand found a home on your cheek, raking his thumb back and forth as he collected the trail of wetness on your skin.

“i love you more than life itself.” you smiled softly, leaning into the boy’s touch. his lips found your forehead shortly after/

“i love you so much.” you whispered, feeling him smile into your skin. you smiled then, feeling the anguish rush out of your chest and make room for the love you felt for the boy in front of you.

“so that’s it, you’re good, everything’s fine again?” you groaned at the sound of brandon’s voice, though it was followed by a small grunt after tyler had smacked brandon.

“let’s go finish our game.” tyler pulled brandon up the stiars, despite his protests and threats towards rafe still spilling past his lips.

you turned back towards rafe, shoulders relaxed now and a small smile sitting on your lips as you looked at the boy who still held your world in his hands.

“i love you.” you hummed at the sound of the words, leaning into rafe as you shut your eyes gently.

“say it again.” you pleaded gently, feeling rafe sigh out in relief as he wrapped his arms around you, still standing in the your front doorway.

“i love you, y/n.” you tilted your head back just enough to catch his lips against yours.

“can we go back to sleep? i’m exhausted.” rafe laughed gently, nodding his head and letting you pull him into the house.

“wait.” rafe moved to grab the folder and pictures that were scattered across the floor of your front porch.

“what, you need them for your spank bank or something?” you teased gently, watching rafe shake his head quickly.

“no, just don’t want anyone else to come home and see them.” you rolled your eyes but laughed gently, allowing him to pick them up.

“you know my dad would just ask. it’d be easy to tell him what happened.” rafe shrugged gently, gripping the pages in his hand somewhat tightly.

“yeah, your dad’s the easy one. on the off chance that one of them called aidan though, i’d rather not end up six feet under tonight.” you laughed loudly then, head thrown back and chest shaking with laughter.

“aidan’s in boston, rafe.” rafe shrugged again, a shaky smile stretching across his lips.

“better to just not take the chance.”

obx taglist: @rafej-cambanks @sportygal55 @diverdcwn @maybankiara @mdlyncline @dpaccione @dontjinx-it

#rafe cameron #rafe #rafe x reader #the outer banks #outer banks #outer banks netflix #obx #the obx #drew starkey #request

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queenboudicaa · 3 years

Text

From Graham Linehan from The Glinner Update [email protected]

Played The Fool

Sue Donym

Sep 16

I remember my college days studying journalism, which don't seem so long ago, but actually are now, and as a young eighteen year old, a friend gives me something she says explains gender. It is Judith Butler's Gender Trouble. I have heard of this book. People treat it like The Bible. I eagerly open the book and attempt to read it.

I cannot make heads or tails of it. I conclude I simply am not smart enough or well-read enough to understand the religious revelation. I make it to page sixty before giving up, the constant mentions of ‘Althusserian’ and ‘structuralist’ and ‘reifying’ finally defeating me. I don’t feel like any of the book has actually managed to lodge itself in my head.

I give the book back to my friend, and then I pretend to everyone around me that I have read the book. No one figures me out.

When I get older, I realize they all did the same thing.

In my senior year, I win election to student government. I am to represent ‘LGBT’ people. I am proud. I am unaware I am now standing on a cliff, the ground beneath me slowly breaking. I bury my head in the sand as my position becomes increasingly precarious.

I meet with faculty during the first semester. I read through a policy. Suddenly ‘LGBT’ has morphed. It’s ‘LGBTQI+’. I don’t know what the Q and I stand for, let alone that seemingly erroneous plus sign. I am supposed to be the expert, and all these middle-aged people are looking at me to explain the youth speak which is even bedeviling I, the putative youth. I muddle through, using this surprise new acronym, and then I Google it surreptitiously in the meeting. It means ‘Queer’ and ‘Intersex’, and the plus sign appears to be decorative in nature. I wonder what the Q covers that ‘LGBT’ doesn’t, let alone the God-damned plus sign, and I wonder why ‘intersex’ needs to be included at all.

They talk enthusiastically about how everyone has a gender. There are women with penises, men with vaginas. Gender is understood to be how you feel inside. I contort my mind around this way of thinking as best I can. A man is someone who behaves like a man, and a woman is someone who behaves like a woman. That is the working definition you have, even though you paper over it with phrases like ‘identifies as.’

I don’t think about. You can’t. You are told this is how it is, how it has always been, to think otherwise is actually you replicating the kyriarchy, over and over and over again, and you nod and accept it, because you are given this set of facts and told to nod. Pseudoscience justifies it. People talk about ‘brain scans’ and ‘the wrong bodymap’, and ‘indigenous genders’. It’s all conjectural bullshit, but everyone goes along with it.

When I can’t perform the cognitive contortions, I simply don’t acknowledge contradicting evidence. To do so would be to jump off a cliff into an abyss. It is a reflexive thing, unconscious, and its origins lie in the instinct for self-preservation.

Everyone goes along with it. I am a coward, so I accept it and move on. I am twenty two years old, and I don’t know any better, and I want to trust the organizations that say they hold my best interests at heart.

Part of my role on student government was providing student-based pastoral care in my college’s LGBT center. By the time I get there, it’s morphed into the LGBTQI+ Center. I consider myself even-keeled and well-adjusted, perfect to help ‘my people’.

Many of the people that come see me have fairly normal problems. I speak to lecturers about not being homophobic, meet with faculty about LGBTQI issues, and sit through interminably boring student government meetings full of bloviating Young Democrats self-assured about their future self-importance. Increasingly, more people come to speak to me about trans issues. Walking through the center one day, someone assumes I am a ‘pre-hormones trans man’. When I correct them, and say I am a butch lesbian, they suddenly become hostile. I don’t know why, but I feel offended to my very bones about being assumed to be a man.

More and more of my fellow butches suddenly start declaring themselves to ‘truly be men.’ I don’t think about this. You’re not supposed to think about it, or question them, just accept and affirm and acknowledge and adulate their new found authenticity. I get a new package of fliers from an LGBT charity, open them up, and suddenly find that I, simply defined as ‘butch’ (forget the lesbian!) am now supposedly ‘trans’ and under the ‘trans umbrella.’ I call this ridiculous, and loudly.

Someone pulls me aside to ask why I’m being so transphobic.

I meet with a charity group. They have this young woman on staff who declares herself ‘non-binary’ and uses ‘they/them’ pronouns. She does not strike me as gay, and her entire purview of ‘LGBT’ seems to forget the first three letters. She assumes that I am a trans man. When I tell her I am a lesbian, she asks ‘are you sure? Maybe you’ll change your mind’. She then starts talking to me about her boyfriend.

I wonder why this straight girl with dyed hair is telling me what to do on gay issues. What gives her the right?

At the end of the meeting, someone I know from the charity group tells me that ‘Aiden’ is upset I forgot her pronouns. I hadn’t realized. I tell him that this dyed hair fag hag told me I’ll change my mind about being a lesbian. He says that doesn’t excuse messing up Aiden’s pronouns.

The next time I meet Aiden, she keeps calling me ‘he’. She gets upset when I get angry with her.

My student body president sends me a please explain email the next day about upsetting Aiden.

One day in the center, in walks a man in a dress. That’s what I thought in my unfiltered thoughts, before the cognitive dissonance kicks in. But the Aiden experience has taught me a lesson to not speak up. The man uses ~the magical pronouns~, ‘she/her’ and this means he is a woman. He dresses like a prostitute downtown and declares he’s a lesbian.

He says he is a trans woman. But Chloe is different from all the trans women I had met before. They would call themselves ‘gay men gone too far’, tell you hilarious stories, wingman for me at the bar, argue about ‘when Madonna went bad’, arguments that turned into handbag duels at dawn. Many of them were older, and many of them had stories about surviving in a homophobic world, surviving AIDS, dangerous johns, and the joy they felt now, that gay rights had gone somewhere. This man was very different to them.

My hair stands up on the back of my neck every time I deal with ‘Chloe’. It requires conscious effort to make sure I don’t mess up his pronouns, because my brain says that’s ‘a fucking man’, but my cognitive dissonance around the situation and my sense of self-preservation knows that if I don’t call this man a woman I will be in for it. I have seen the results - ‘Chloe’, all six feet of ‘Chloe’, screaming at a fellow trans woman, Clara, half his size, for saying ‘you’re a man honey’. Chloe himself came to me demanding I ban her from the space. I refused.

Clara stops coming into the center. I ask her why, and she says ‘those flipping transvestites, they’re not us.’ Clara never comes back to the center.

None of this thinking about Chloe’s pronouns is conscious. I feel guilty every time my thoughts use the ‘wrong pronouns’. My head is tied up in knots - not something freshman me would have considered, turning up to the center with the goal of getting laid, now trying to smile and put up with this man.

He makes every conversation in there uncomfortable. We relax when he is gone and only homosexuals are in the room.

Suddenly, my straight friends start asking if I’d ‘sleep with a trans woman’. I try laughing this off. One friend gets very insistent, and when I tell him that I wouldn’t consider someone with a dick, he starts wondering if my preferences are ‘rooted in bigotry’. I ask him if he’d sleep with a trans woman. He tells me that no, he’d prefer a woman who can have his children.

I smile and nod, and when the conversation ends, walk out of the room as fast as I can.

Chloe tells us at length about their sexual proclivities. Bondage and leather and ‘being a dom’. Chloe tells us about his lack of luck on lesbian dating apps. I keep to myself that I had ended up setting a height filter to filter out ‘the trannies.’ Nor do I tell him that me and a group of women had made fun of men like him on lesbian dating apps, swapping screenshots and Silence Of The Lambs jokes.

Soon there are more Chloes and fewer women. They all start talking about radical communism, about ‘sex work is work’, ‘cultural appropriation’, and about ‘TERFs’ and how hideous they are. One of them expounds to me at length why I shouldn’t read any feminist works from the seventies, because they hated trans women, and I wouldn’t want to hate trans women, wouldn’t I?

They all behave the same way. I keep getting reports about the Chloes harassing people in the center, particularly young lesbian women. Then there is an influx of ‘Aidens’, straight women declaring themselves to really be gay men. One of them tells me I am ‘appropriating the culture of trans men.’

One day I am in the center, and I look out the glass window of my office. There are a dozen people sitting in the common room of the center, talking animatedly. I realize none of them are lesbian or gay in the actual sense of the word. I feel uncomfortable, but I cannot articulate why I feel such discomfort.

One of the Chloes knocks on my door. This one wears a pink tube top and a pencil skirt. I am strongly reminded of Buffalo Bill. He asks me out for coffee. I decline. He asks why, as I am single. I say that I am busy that day. He tries asking for another day. I say I am playing club football that day. He keeps trying to cajole me. Eventually I dispense with the politeness and tell him I am not interested in him. He shouts at me that I am transphobic and leaves.

A few hours later, my phone blows up. His friends are calling me transphobic for not being interested in him. It’s just one date, they say. One little coffee. You might like it. You don’t know. Your last girlfriend dressed the same. You need to unlearn your genital preferences.

I think to myself my last girlfriend was a foot shorter and had a vagina, but I don’t say anything. I ignore the messages. He is allowed boundaries. I am not.

I am sitting in a class. It’s on sexual histories, a class I took to broaden my horizons from my journalism degree. I try not to think of the student loan I’ll be incurring from taking it.

Strangely enough, it is perhaps the first blow to the self-imposed contortions of my thoughts. The professor starts his lecture by pronouncing that sexual orientation is, in fact, a social construct. He explains that the word ‘homosexuality’ did not exist until the 19th century, and thus, homosexuals are a creation of repressive Victorian sexuality. I find this theory strange. I had grown up in the ‘born this way’ era, to be sure, but my homosexuality seemed biological, instinctual, basal to my very way of being. A powerful attraction to women came to me as naturally as breathing, or seeing, or farting inappropriately on the second date. Yet here was this man telling me, that in fact, my perceptions were merely constructs based on my surroundings.

It seemed strange to me. Someone from the class, notorious for asking questions, puts his hands up and asks about the Romans - you see, he is a student of the classics, and he remarks that the Romans knew of homosexuals. The professor gravely informs in that in fact the Romans were aware of a ‘behavior’, and that as ‘homosexual’ as a word did not exist at the time, there were no homosexuals. Only behaviors, that we codify and understand on a cultural basis.

This made less sense to me than before. It made even less sense to me when someone else asks about trans people. The professor remarks that ‘trans people have always existed’.

Yet homosexuals were invented by the first sexologists, rather than through self-definition? We had to have heterosexuals invent us, as other, first?

I am sitting with some gay friends, and one of them complains about the focus on trans issues when we still don’t have same-sex marriage federally yet. We talk about our disappearing spaces, and I voice that sometimes I am the only lesbian out of thirty people sitting in the LGBTQI+ student center (it had been renamed). I think of it in terms of getting laid - because suddenly all the ‘lesbians’ in the center had penises. It happened so quickly that it was easy to notice. I went to a lesbian group, and it was a sausage fest I made up an excuse to leave. The Chloes moved in, and the lesbians instantly left. I feel constantly uncomfortable, watched, stared at, envied. The Chloes all talk about their genitalia and violent pornography at length, in public, and it makes me feel gross and dirty, and I start to dislike most of them.

I post on my Tinder that I’m not into penis. I log in the next day to find out my account has been banned. Tinder never gives me a straight answer as to why I was banned.

I finish out my term on student government. I don’t run again. I’m a senior. I finish my degree and hurry off to the real world. One of the Chloes takes my place as ‘LGBTQI+ students representative’.

It is the one who tried getting me to go out on a date with him. He makes me feel uncomfortable throughout the whole handover.

I am upset, because he will destroy everything I worked for.

I go to the gay bar with some friends. But when we go, we feel like the only homosexuals in the whole god-damn bar. It’s full of people with dyed hair. A man in a dress tries grinding on me, and when I turn around and tell him no, he calls me ‘transphobic towards trans femmes’. When I declare I am a butch lesbian, people ask if I am a ‘TERF’. I don’t know what a ‘TERF’ is, other than ‘terfs’ are bad. I have been told terfs are bad, so it has to be true right? I don’t want to be a bad person.

I try going to other gay events, and suddenly I am outnumbered. Me, a few older lesbians, and some gay men huddle in a corner of spaces we once proudly called our own, as the Chloes and the Aidens declare it their own - and even worse, that they are just the same as us. It is unnerving, and they no longer feel like safe spaces for me. Gradually, we all stop going. There were no more gay people in the gay space.

I have a lesbian friend. She tells me excitedly about a first date. She meets them in a quirky coffee shop. It is a trans woman twice her size. When she tells the trans woman that she’s not interested, they lose it at her in the coffee shop, calling her a transphobic bigot and screaming and shouting and threatening to hit her.

She tells me, because she knows I don’t tell people things. But she cannot say anything in public. She’ll be transphobic. So she keeps it to herself, and this man gets to continue preying on women who think they’re safe, catfishing, coercing and abusing them.

To say otherwise gets you labelled a terf. And terfs are bad. Why are terfs bad? Don’t ask. Just accept that terfs are bad. Terfs hurt trans women, and you wouldn’t want to do that, would you?

Eventually, my friend hears of her date doing it to someone else. She writes a call out post, saying that you shouldn’t hide important facts about yourself on dating sites. She gets called a terf for saying that ‘lesbians don’t have dicks’, and being verbally abused in public was the rational response of an oppressed person to oppression. It’s a scarlet letter, and she is branded with it. I am a coward and I do not speak up in public. I hate myself. I am thinking of my personal prospects, and not my friend, and not my people. Because if I speak up, I can kiss the career I dream about goodbye. I fear that scarlet letter being branded on my forehead.

I tell my friend in private that I support her. But I daren’t say that in public.

I daren’t ask questions.

One day, I am aimlessly browsing the internet at work. I have written enough copy to cover my ass for the next few weeks. I wait until my boss leaves for the afternoon, and wait out the rest of the day mindlessly scrolling. I see a post in an LGBTQI+ students group on Facebook I’ve forgotten to leave. It’s a troll post, which is apparently ‘terf rhetoric’. The link is still there, and the comments are blowing up, united in performative outrage.

I click the link . I find myself laughing at the description of ‘men in dresses’. To these ‘terfs’, a man has a penis, and a woman has a vagina. Anyone saying otherwise is a damned fool. It seems such an easy way to think about it. I mean, what is a woman, anyway? It doesn’t seem evil, wicked or bad. It seems… sensible.

Finding out more about this new way of thinking becomes addicting. I keep my scrolling through it on my phone. I have always had a fondness for reading people being harshly critical about anything, and now I have an endless source of it, articulating things I knew instinctually but could never find the words to verbalize, could never find the courage to verbalize. I wonder if I am being radicalized - images of ISIS radicalizing fighters over the internet run through my head. But everything seems to make so much sense. I am no longer contorting my thoughts around the desires of others, but thinking freely, observationally, openly, fearlessly.

It felt like my mind had freed itself from chains, chains placed upon it all those years ago, when that naïve eighteen year old who wanted to get laid tried reading Gender Trouble.

The gunk on my mind slowly unclogged. My way of thinking suddenly changed. I was no longer denying what my eyes saw in front of me. No, now I saw things as they were. There was no more contorting my way of thought. For the first time in a long time, I felt clear-headed.

One of the links I clicked in my flurry was a link to Dr. Ray Blanchard’s paper on ‘autogynephilia’. I read it, and finally, I had an explanation. Homosexual transsexuals. And ‘autogynephiles.’ The two types of his famous and controversial typology.

‘Autogynephiles’ - men who had a sexual fetish for ‘being a woman’, a fetish for an alter-ego female self, a fetish for our bodies, our minds, our souls, our experiences. All reduced to jerk-off fodder for some blockhead man.

It explained why they were so desperate for lesbians to date them. They needed us for validating their sexual fetish. Our lives and experiences, our spaces, our dating apps, our culture, our media, our websites, every breath we took, as far as they were concerned, needed to be focused on validating them. Because otherwise, the fantasy was ruined! This straight man would not be able to jerk off over ‘being a lesbian!’. We were not people, we were non-player-characters in their video game. Actresses in pornography, extras in a film where they were the protagonist, and we were off script. We weren’t fully-formed people, with our own desires, we were things, objects, film props.

The entire gay movement, from the lesbians to the gays, to the homosexual transsexuals, reduced to nothing props in some straight man’s sexual fantasy. That’s all we were to them, ultimately.

And I was expected to go along with it?! We were all expected to go along with it?

Not only that, I had gone along with it. I had advocated for this.

What had I done?

Every moment you come close, every moment you start thinking something isn’t right, you start feeling a little foolish.

Of course this is fine. Everyone is telling me so. The media, the public, the people around you. No one voices concerns. When you have them, you don’t say anything, because no one else is, and because you are a coward.

You feel a little foolish because this is foolish. Saying some women have penises is foolish. You know it is foolish, from the minute that idiot phrase leaves your mouth, to the minute it dances across your tongue, to the minute your nerves send the signal to your larynx to make the required movements to produce the very sounds. But, you think, you are no fool.

You are no fool, you think, when someone says ‘biological women have XY chromosomes’, or that it’s okay for a man on the college track team to identify as a woman and take a place on the woman’s track team. You know that’s not right. But everyone else is going along with it, and you are no fool, and you shouldn’t feel foolish, because everyone says this is the right thing to do, the right side of history, doing right by an oppressed minority, so you go along with it.

You are frightened of realizing you are a fool. So too, is everyone around you. No one likes being played the fool, no one likes realizing they were sold a pack of lives as a naïve eighteen year old looking for other gay people. And no one plays you for a fool. And thus the dance continues, everyone one too frightened to admit that, perhaps, we are all fools, believing in something physically impossible, no different to the bible-banging megachurch attendee, with our owns chants, our own magic words, ritual knowledge, and ability to be born again. We are smart. We liberal. We are on the right side of history. We couldn’t be believing in something that isn’t scientifically backed. We’re smarter than that. We’re not fools.

And when it finally gets too much, and you drift over to the cliff’s edge, the cliff that you can see the bottom of, the cliff you know you can’t come back from, you pull away. Because to go over it would to be to admit that you’ve been played the fool. No one likes that feeling, the shame, the embarrassment, the horror, the fear. What lies over that cliff is exile, a scarlet letter, fear and hatred and nasty women who just want trans women dead.

What lies beyond that cliff is a realization that you have been used. You have been used by something greater than yourself, to push medication on children. You have been used by straight men to participate in their sexual fetish without your consent. Your entire community, rendered a jerk-off prop for some straight man over night, and you were told that objecting was ‘transphobic’. You have been used to spread homophobia beyond your comprehension, to take part in the destruction of your own community, and you were told this was right and good.

To realize this, to acknowledge it, to move on and try and forge something better, that takes true strength of character. To realize this, to deny it, and obfuscate what you are doing, that I can understand. I too, was once a coward. I too, did not want to believe what my eyes told me was sitting in front of me. That cliff is scary, and to jump off it seemingly lies nothing but social death.

But eventually something pushes you over, without your consent. You realize you have been played the fool, because finally, something so gratuitous occurs that you must. Even the greatest cowards will eventually be blown off the cliff. The music will stop, and the dance will end, and you will finally feel the shame, the embarrassment, the horror, the fear, the guilt.

Because no one likes being played for a fool.

Perhaps, then, it is best to get this over and done with now, while you still have dignity to defend.

Some details have been changed to protect the identities of those concerned.

#radical feminism #radical feminists #transwomen #transwomens bodies look awfully similar to mens bodies #radfem #radfem community #graham glinner #butch #lesbian #lgbt #lgb

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calumance · 4 years

Note

omg your smut pieces 😍 please write another smut one maybe horny cal that calls one of the boys to take care of aiden so he can seduce his baby mama LOL or maybe horny parents when aiden is asleep 🤣

Y’all got me horny on main today!!! 😳😳😳

They never got any alone time, not any more, at least. Aiden was three now, and even though he slept through the night, they were always way too tired to enjoy each other’s company. It was starting to drive Calum absolutely insane. How could it not drive him insane when she always looked as good as she did? He took a drink of water in an effort to calm himself down, but as soon as he took the drink, she walked through into the kitchen. She was wearing his sweatshirt, a pair of old sweatpants, slipper socks, and her hair was tied up into a messy bun. He knew for a fact that she hadn’t washed her hair in about two days, but it didn’t bother him, she was still more beautiful than ever. “Hi, honey.” She said with a smile as she grabbed his wrist to pull herself towards him to kiss his cheek.

Her touch lit a fire in in the pit of his stomach that suddenly made his pants fit a bit tighter. He smiled at her and slyly covered the growing erection. He turned to watch her grab something from a cabinet a bit too high for her reach. While she was on her toes he approached her from behind, burying his nose into the crook of her neck. His hands gripped her hips as he pulled her back towards him, he backside rubbing against the almost full erection. She tilted her head away from him, giving him all the access to her skin. He nibbles on her neck and she swallowed a moan. She loved everything about his touch, and she missed everything about it. She wanted him to take her right where they were standing, but the quickly approaching footsteps caused them both to groan and part from each other. “Mama!” Aiden exclaimed happily. She raised her eyebrows and his tiny hand reached for hers, pulling her out of the kitchen.

Calum leaned against the counter and shook his head, looking down at himself and rolling his eyes. A thought popped in his head and he reached for his phone and dialed Ashton’s number. Ashton, although laughing hysterically, agreed to come pick Aiden up and take him to stay the night. Calum jumped and ran to find where Aiden took his wife. He found them sitting in the lounge watching a movie. When they connected eyes, she paused the movie and they both looked towards Calum. “Aiden, want to go spend the night at Uncle Ashton’s?” Aiden cheered and clapped while she gave him a questioning look. He held up a finger and continued to look at Aiden. “Why don’t you go get your stuff ready, Uncle Ash will be here in just a little bit.” Aiden pushed himself off the couch and ran past Calum towards his bedroom.

She followed behind Aiden, but stopped next to Calum. “Sleep over at Ashton’s, huh?” Calum smirked as she raised one eyebrow and looked him up and down. Calum nodded and she laughed, shaking her head. “Why didn’t we think of that earlier?” Calum raised his eyebrows a few times, causing her to giggle and head down the hallway to help Aiden get his things pulled together.

Ashton eyed the both of them, a smirk pulling at his lip. It was entirely too obvious how antsy they were for Ashton to take Aiden so they could finally be alone. Ashton laughed and looked at Aiden, “You ready to go, buddy? I have all kinds of fun stuff planned for us tonight.” Aiden nodded furiously and Ashton waved goodbye before shutting the door behind him, carrying Aiden to the car. They pressed their noses to the window to watch Ashton load Aiden into the car. As soon as Ashton pulled out of the drive way it was game on.

Calum reached down and grabbed her hips to turn her around. Once she was facing him, his lips crashed onto hers, their hands searched for each other desperately. Calum pulled the sweatshirt that was covering the upper half of her body up and over her head before backing her up and pressing her back against the wall. His lips immediately connected to her neck and she tilted her head to the side, giving him more access. Calum’s right hand traveled up from her hip and to her chest, squeezing her breast ever so gently, which earned him a soft moan from her lips.

Her fingers hooked under the top of his sweatpants as he nibbled on her neck. With one push, his pants fell to the ground. Calum kicked them out from under his feet, his lips never leaving her skin. The only moment they left the spot was when she ran her hand up the front of his boxers. He groaned before connecting his lip back to her skin, but dropped both hands to the top of her sweatpants, wasting no time to push them to the ground. Trying to keep herself balanced, she reached down and pulled her slipper socks and sweatpants off at the same time. Once they were discarded, Calum hooked his hand under the back of her thighs and lifted them so her legs were wrapped around his waist. He pushed her back against the wall, a little harder than he planned to, causing her to groan louder than she had expected. “Fuck,” she said out loud as she wrapped her arms around Calum’s neck and dug her fingernails into his skin.

He tilted his head back and hissed. He opened his eyes and looked her up and down. She was absolutely beautiful, he didn’t think he could hold on any longer. Seeing his lust blown eyes, she knew she couldn’t hold on any longer. Quickly, she reached down and moved her underwear to the side as he pushed his boxers to the floor. The second there was nothing in between them, he pushed into her. They both swore at the feeling, her back arching off the wall and her head tilting back. Knowing that she was secure, his hands fell off her legs and quickly pulled her shirt up and over her head. It had been a lazy morning, so she had decided there was no reason for her to wear a bra. Calum reveled in this decision as his lips wrapped around her hardened nipple.

He concentrated on his thrusts while he gently sucked on her nipple, his hands reaching for hers. Once he found them, he lifted them over her head and pinned them to the wall with one hand. She nearly screamed as he grabbed her breast and pushed into her deeper. Instead, the scream got caught in her throat and it just left her mouth hanging open and her stomach tightening. “No one’s here, we can be as loud as we want.” Calum whispered into her ear just before kissing the space between her jaw and her ear. He squeezed her breast harder and thrust into her hard enough to put a hole in the wall, the scream finally coming out.

He lowered his head to her shoulder and solely focused on his movements. They were both nearing the edge, and they could both feel it. Her core tightening, his movements becoming sloppy, the room filled with moans and swear words. With one finally thrust, they both came undone, moaning and uttering each other’s names. They stood still for a second, catching their breaths. Calum’s lips traveled up her neck and to her jaw, only to whisper, “I’m not done with you yet.” He smirked against her skin, kicked his boxer shorts away from him and hastily carried her down the hallway to the bedroom.

************

Tag list: @mantlereid @notinthesameguey @viiirg0 @wheniminouterspace @thinkofmehlgh @another-lonely-heart@limer-encia @itsmytimetoodream @babyoria

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justanotherwriter-fangirl · 4 years

Text

He´s My Son (K. S.)

Words: 4,420 words

Warnings: Mentions of abuse, gangs, drugs and cheating, a little bit of violence and a couple curse words but overall I think it’s friendly.

Request: Can you write a imagine where kelly's girlfriend has Aiden her 5 years old son and kelly's been his father figure since he was two and then the reader's ex comes back and wants to be in Aiden's life and go to the firehouse where kelly is with Aiden to take the little boy with him because the reader doesn't want him in his life because he is involved with gangs and drugs so kelly tells him that Aiden is his son and that he won't take him and all 51 support him? You finished, please...

A/N: Hi!!! I’m so happy with how this turned out, hope you all enjoy it and like it as much as I do so let me know how you feel about it.

Gif obtained from Google. All credits to its owner.

Thanks for reading

_______________________

Life had never been easy with you, leaving your home in a small town at age 17 to ran away from a place where nothing ever happened, arriving to the big city of Chicago where you didn’t know anyone with barely any money, looking for a job as a waitress to afford the expenses of your new life and last but not least, meeting the man who would later turn into your worst nightmare.

Once you arrived to Chicago and settled in a little apartment you could barely afford, you decided to enroll in Chicago’s Community College to become a nurse, it had been hard with a lot of double shifts at weekends and many many nights awake studying but finally you did it and got a nice job at Gaffney Chicago Medical Center, that’s where you met the person who you thought you would spend the rest of your life with, Ryan.

He had entered to the ED after a motorcycle accident and you immediately felt attracted to him, it was crazy, he was your patient and there was more important things to think of, like taking care of his multiple wounds, mostly cuts and scratches, but still, you couldn’t fell for a patient, that was basic.

But life’s funny like that so after Will cleared him off to leave the hospital, he asked you out, you tried to refuse even when you didn’t really want to saying that he was a patient and it was wrong, but he insisted, he wasn’t a patient anymore, he had just been released, so with that argument and a little flattering of his part, you agreed to go out with him.

One date turned into two and then three and without realising it suddenly 2 years had passed by and you were moving together. You loved him, you really did and that was the main reason why you stayed with him, even after learning that he was part of a gang on the southside of the city and his day job was selling drugs, yes it was bad but he had always been so good to you.

A year later and things started to change, every cell in your body often told you to run away from that guy, that he was bad news and he was going to get you killed someday but your heart couldn’t bare the idea of leaving him. You had passed many sleepless night trying to figure out what to do, always trying to convince yourself to leave but you couldn’t, you were sure you could change him and get him out from that life, after all, that was your job, to help people. That thought was kept you going every day, despite all your fights and all those times he would grabbed your arms so hard that you'd have to wear long sleeves to work to hide the bruises, despite the nights he would come home so high or drunk that he could barely pronounce your name and all the nights you knew he was cheating on you, because, after all, it wasn’t his fault, right? It was all the drug’s fault and the people he hang with.

And one day, right when you thought nothing was going to change, you took that pregnancy test, two lines staring back at you giving you the hope you needed, that little person growing inside you was going to be the light at the end of the tunnel, that little baby was the answer to all your prayers.

But that wasn’t how Ryan thought at all, when you told him the news he was so furious, yelling at you for being so sloppy, for getting pregnant to tie him up and finally for cheating on him because there was no way that baby was his. After that he just left with his friends, probably to get high again and sleep with some other girl, leaving you at home alone and crying your heart out.

You felt destroyed, how could he said all those things to you? You always were faithful, you always forgive him and, more importantly, you always stayed until suddenly something changed, your tears stopped and you realized now you really had to leave, if not for you then for your baby who now depended of you so grabbing a bag you started to pack all your stuff, leaving nothing behind that could be a sign that you ever lived there.

Once on the street, with the air hitting your face as you put everything in your car, you felt the weight of the world being lifted of from your shoulders for the first time in a very long time, taking your phone out to call April, your best friend in the world.

You had met her when you first started working at the ED, from the beginning she was nice and helped you to get used to the craziness you had to deal with everyday. Being the sweetheart she was, she let you stayed at her place through all your pregnancy, you insisted to stay just for a couple days, just enough until you could found another apartment but she didn't let you go, completely excited with the idea of being the aunt of your baby.

Time flew by and when you least expected it, Aiden was born, the whole ED crew by your side, April and Will holding your hands, Natalie making sure everything was going fine and Maggie supporting you from the side with her encouraging words.

In that moment, with your little baby boy in your arms and all your friends around you, life couldn't be better.

After Aiden turned 1 you moved to a nice little apartment near the hospital where you met Kelly Severide, he was April's childhood friend and went with her at the housewarming party. He was sweet, charming and so handsome and you both really hit it off immediately but after Ryan and everything you had gone through you were a little bit wary of going back to the dating world, specially now that you had your little boy with you, Aiden being your number 1 priority. You knew Kelly was nothing like Ryan but that didn’t change the fact that you had some trust issues regarding guys.

It was really hard to say no to him when the boy was so persistent, going to visit you at the hospital whenever he had time in between calls when he was working or going to your place with some takeout to help you take care of the baby.

Slowly but surely, he eventually won your heart, having all those little details with you made you warm up to the idea of dating him and break down all the walls you had around your heart.

One rare night when you had the opportunity to go to Molly's with Maggie and April after shift, he showed up, flowers in hand and a huge smile on his face, to ask you officially on a date, how could you ever say no to that? He was the perfect gentleman and more importantly than anything, he accepted you with all your baggage, trust issues and Aiden, willing to be his father figure.

He soon started to be there in every first of Aiden, his first tooth, his first steps, his first word, the first time you ever took him to a zoo or his first day at daycare, staying with you at night and helping you whenever he woke up at 3 am crying or taking care of him when he wasn’t on duty and you had long shifts at the hospital.

He was fully committed, not only with you but with Aiden too, so much that one day when you had stopped by the firehouse with Aiden to pay him a quick visit you caught him at the table of squad 3 reading a book about “100 things you need to know about babies”, the sight melting away all doubts and fears you ever had, leaving nothing behind but love because that was the moment you realized you loved Kelly and it was such a strong and powerful feeling you had never experienced before.

Time flew by and before you realized it you were throwing Aiden’s fifth birthday party, the theme: firefighters. Ever since he was aware of what Kelly did for a living and understood what it was about, all he wanted was to be a firefighter, rescue people and be lieutenant of the squad just like him and every time he would mention it the smile on Kelly’s face would only get bigger full with pride.

“Happy birthday to you…” you all sang to Aiden in front of his fire truck birthday cake, the whole firehouse and Med staff there to spent the day celebrating with you.

“Blow out the candles, champ” Kelly said ruffling his hair.

“Don’t forget to make a wish!”

“Done!” he yelled before blowing the candles while everyone laughed and clapped, the boy having everyone in the room wrapped around their little finger.

“So... tell us, Aiden, what did you wished for?” April said

“I wished…” he said slowly creating expectation in the room “to be just like dad! A firefighter!” he screamed before hopping off his chair to go play with his friends, everyone on the room celebrating and laughing without realizing what had just happened. They couldn’t know it but that had been the first time Aiden called Kelly his dad, bringing happy tears to your eyes.

Even though Kelly had been there for you both since Aiden was almost two and Aiden couldn’t remember much before him, you had always told him the truth, letting him know that Kelly was your boyfriend and his biological father had disappeared long before he was born, it had been a little bit difficult to explain it to a 4 years old boy but with Kelly’s help you managed to do it avoiding all the ugly parts of the story and letting him know that no matter who his biological father was, you and Kelly would always love him.

Since he was a toddler who was barely starting to speak you had taught him that honesty was the best policy so you always tried to teach him by example even when it came to situations like that, once you explained it all to him Kelly and you made sure he knew that you were his family no matter what, trying to clear all fears from his little head when he asked if Kelly would leave you just like the other man did, the question almost breaking your heart and leaving you without an answer, fortunately Kelly immediately told him that he would never leave either one of you, that he loved you both and that we wanted to be his dad if he let him.

Around a year has passed since that day and you were more than happy to know that finally Aiden’s fears had gone away and he was ready to call Kelly his dad, sure that he would never leave you.

In that moment you felt Kelly’s strong arm around you waist making you come back to reality, proud and happiness all over his face as he looked down at you, that one look being more than enough to let you know what he was thinking, that moment in time being the proof that it was all worth it and without the hardest and darkest moments in your life you wouldn’t be standing there surrounded by the people you loved most.

“Who wants some cake?” you heard April in the background “Kelly, be nice and hand me some plates, please” she said while cutting the slices without realizing you were just having a moment when suddenly the doorbell rang.

“I’m coming” you said.

“Hey, (Y/N), if it’s Capp he better be standing behind that door with a really big present for Aiden, we will not tolerate him arriving just in time for the cake” Herrmann said making you laugh.

“I’ll let him know” you said opening the door still laughing.

“Miss me?” said the man at the door, his voice sending a chill down your spine and making you want to grab your son and run.

He hadn’t change a bit since the last time you saw him around 6 years ago but now all you ever saw in him transformed into disgust and fear.

“R-Ryan?” you stuttered closing the door as much as you could so nobody could see him “What are you doing here? How did you found me?”

“Well, it certainly wasn’t easy, especially since you left no trail behind you that time you left me but a couple days ago a friend of mine told me he saw you entering this building, I thought I would pay you a visit to check on you, see how are you doing now”

“I’m fine, thanks for the visit but I have to get back inside” you said trying to hide your nerves and closing the door when a rough push from his hand stopped you.

“Aren’t you going to invite me in, (Y/N)? It’s not like everyday your son turns 5 years old” in that moment you felt like your soul had left our body and all color drained from your face.

“I-I don’t… don’t know what you’re talking about”

“Don’t play stupid and let me in, (Y/N), I want to meet my son” he said threatening when it reached you from the inside the sound of Aiden’s laugh, making you snap out of your fearful state.

“He’s not your son, you made that very clear 6 years ago when I told you I was pregnant” you said firmly taking back all your power, your mother instinct kicking in instantly. “So now leave before I call the police” you finished before closing the door in his face, still shocked from your outburst.

It took you a second to recompose yourself, still trembling from the encounter with the man that some nights still haunted your dreams.

“Babe, do you want some cake?” said Kelly approaching you when he noticed the state you were in “Hey, what happened? Are you okay? Who was it?” he quickly questioned putting his hands in your shoulders to look at you and make sure you weren’t harm.

“He’s back, Kelly” you whispered, the lump in your throat barely letting anything out “Ryan’s back”

"What?"

"It was him at the door, he said that he wanted to meet Aiden. Kelly, what am I going to do? What if he wants to take him away?"

"What we are going to do is talk to Antonio, hell we’ll talk to Voight if we need to, we'll put a restraining order and make sure there is no way he can get close to you again, you're not alone anymore, (Y/N), you have all of us, you have me"

"I'm scared"

"I know" he said enveloping you in a hug as if that way he could protect you from all the bad in the world.

“Mom, hurry! I want to open my presents!” said Aiden running to you and tugging at your hand. With your head still buried on Kelly’s chest you took a second to breathe and push all your worries to the back of your head, making sure to put in a smile for Aiden.

“Let’s go, honey” you said stepping back, grabbing Kelly’s hand and letting the kid guide you to the living room where everyone was sitting around a big pile of presents.

“Okay, champ, open up mine first” said Kelly sitting in the floor next to him and passing him a box.

“Kelly…” you said, you had told him that it wasn’t necessary at all, he had already helped a lot with the organization of the party.

As Aiden ripped the paper and took the lid on a big red firefighter helmet came into view.

“Mom, look!” Aiden exclaimed putting it on “Now I’m a firefighter!”

Everyone laughed, he was so happy and that was what mattered the most. He continued opening the rest of his presents: clothes, a superhero cape and a bunch of toys.

It was around 7 when you and the girls could finally just sit down in the living room to talk and drink some wine, the guys at the kitchen with some beers and a mess of chips and popcorn around them and the rest of the kids and their parents gone.

Aiden had fallen asleep in your arms half an hour ago with his firefighter helmet still on and you wished everything could stay just like that.

“Hey, Antonio, I need to ask you a favor” said Kelly taking him apart for a moment.

“Yeah, of course, tell me”

“I don’t know if Dawson ever told you anything about (Y/N)’s ex boyfriend, Aiden’s father”

“Not much, she once mentioned he was into drugs and gangs but not much more, he’s not in the system”

“Well, he came by earlier saying that he wants to meet Aiden and (Y/N)’s afraid he might want to take him away, is there anything we can do? I was thinking about a restraining order but I don’t know how much that can help considering his background”

“Well, we can start with that but there’s not much we can do without any evidence”

"Okay, thanks"

“If anything happens let me know, okay?”

“Sure, thanks Antonio” Kelly said going back with the rest of the guys.

When you least expected it it was already 10 pm and everyone was going, it was saturday but that didn’t mean anything being a nurse, doctor, detective or firefighter, most of you having to work the next day.

“Aiden was so happy, I think we did something right today” Kelly told you while you were getting ready to get in bed.

“Yeah, I swear I could see his little face lighting up when he opened your present, thank you, Kelly, for everything”

“It was nothing, really. I saw it the other day on my way back to the fire house after a call and I thought of him”

“I don’t know what I’d be doing without you”

“Handling it like you always have, sweetheart, I’m here because you want me around, not because you need me”

“You always have the right words, don’t you?” you said laughing a little bit.

“I hope so” he said getting into bed and extending his arms for you to crawl with him.

“What are we going to do tomorrow?” you asked once you were both in bed, your head on his chest and his hand playing with your hair “You have shift and I have to be at the ED”

“I can take him with me, come pick him up after your shift, we can even have dinner together there”

“Are you sure? I don’t want to cause you any trouble”

“Totally, I’ll speak with the chief and whenever we have a call he can stay with Connie, she’ll love him, don’t worry about it” he finished pressing a kiss on your forehead, the feeling of his fingers playing with your hair relaxing you and making you feel sleepy.

“Okay but if anything happens or you need me to go get him, just call me, okay?” you said suppressing a yawn.

“Just sleep, babe” was the last thing you heard.

That night was probably the worst you’ve had in a while, images of Ryan, your past together and him taking Aiden away constantly awakening you and keeping you from resting properly so you were more than happy when you noticed the sun was rising from behind your curtains.

Trying to not wake up Kelly you slid out of bed and headed towards the kitchen, coffee being your only thought after the horrible night you had.

Once you had a cup of coffee in your system you went to the bathroom to take a shower, the caffeine and the water helping you to feel completely awake and ready for the day. After you finished and put your nurse uniform on you found your way back to kitchen to start breakfast and since it was sunday you choose to spoil your boys a little bit with some nutella waffles.

You were halfway done when you heard steps coming from the hallway and then a pair of strong arms wrapped around your middle, Kelly resting his chin over your shoulder and leaving a small kiss on your neck.

“Morning” he said in a low husky voice.

“Good morning, babe. Can you go wake Aiden up, please?”

“Are you sure you want me to?” he said now peppering your shoulder with small kisses.

“Not exactly but you both need to get ready to go to the firehouse” you said giving a squeeze to one of his hands before going back to your current task “Puls, don’t forget that tuesday’s our day, we’ll leave Aiden with Matt and Gabby and then it’ll be just us to do whatever you want”

“Fine” he said finally letting you go “Can’t wait for it to be tuesday though” you heard him saying from the hallway.

You were setting the table when you heard laughter coming your way, Kelly appearing with Aiden on his back, the red firefighter helmet once again on his head matching his fire truck pajamas.

“Hey Aiden, tell mama what I was just telling you” Kelly said putting Aiden down on a chair and sitting next to you.

“I’m going to dad’s job today!” Aiden yelled raising his arms, a light on his eyes you would do anything to protect.

“That’s right, buddy, now eat your breakfast so we can get ready to leave”

An hour later you were saying goodbye to your boys and heading towards your car, ready for the day ahead.

“Ok, Aiden, let me give you the tour” Kelly told the 5 year old once they reached the firehouse, the toddler hand on his while they walk to the front door.

“Hey! Look who’s here” yelled Herrmann from the inside, the rest of the house coming out to receive Aiden.

“Look, I’m one of you” he let go of Kelly’s hand to go running to the guys, showing them his red helmet again.

Everyone there loved the little guy, he had won their hearts a long time ago and it was obvious as they all show him around and let him get into the fire truck, never treating him as Kelly’s partner son but as if he was his own because for anyone who ever had the pleasure to meet the three of you all they could see was a family, not mattering blood but the real connection you all had.

“Hey, Aiden, I need to tell you something” said Kelly in a moment of quiet, kneeling down to be eye level with him “Listen, champ, because it’s important, okay?”

“Okay” he said putting on his serious face and trying to cross his little arms over his chest almost making Kelly laugh.

“There will be a moment when the sirens will go on and we’ll be call to go do our job and I won’t be able to take you with me so you are going to stay with Connie, okay? She’s nice but you have to listen to her while I’m gone” he said pointing at her who was going over some papers at her desk.

“Ohh, I like her” he said now relaxing and getting closer to Kelly “She once draw with me while you and mom were busy but told me to keep it a secret” Aiden whispered to him and put his finger over his lip.

“Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone” Kelly said playing along.

“Is that him? My son?” was suddenly being heard from the front, Kelly well aware of who was the owner of that voice and fire started to run down his veins.

“Hey, why don’t you go with Mouch to watch some cartoons? I’m sure he was looking for something new to watch” quickly said Kelly to the boy, Aiden running to the inside excited to show someone else his new favorite show and unaware of anything else.

Standing up and turning around he met eye to eye with the man who had hurt you so much many years ago and now was trying once again to do it.

“Leave, now” Kelly said angrily

“I’m not leaving anywhere unless it’s with my son”

By now everyone had already noticed the tension between the two and were getting around them, ready to back their lieutenant up or keep him from doing something stupid.

“Are you out of your mind? He never was and never will be yours”

“I have rights, he’s my son and I demand to see him” said getting closer to Kelly.

“You have no rights here, pal, you’re in my territory now and I’m not scared of you so before you do something you might regret just leave and leave my family alone because he’s MY son”

“Your family?” Ryan said before laughing “That dumb bitch will leave you just like she did with me, she’s not worth all the trouble, man”

“What did you just said!?” exploded Kelly pushing him back, everyone ready to break them apart.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you” said Matt getting in the middle when Ryan was about to push Kelly back.

“Yeah man, just leave” added Cruz, a halligan in his hands.

That’s when they both took a second to look around, almost everyone was there including chief Boden who was watching everything from behind, the only ones missing were the girls and Mouch, taking care of Aiden.

“I’m not done yet” said Ryan when he realized he was outnumbered.

“Yes, it is. Now leave and don’t ever come back” added Herrmann from the side.

“Whatever, we’ll see about that” finished Ryan before leaving the fire house.

“Are you okay, Severide?” stepped in chief Boden.

“Yes, sir” he said breathing and running a hand down his face.

“Good, now I suggest we let CPD know about this situation, it must be enough for them to do something. Back to work everybody”

Kelly knew it wasn’t going to be that easy but he didn’t care because no matter what he would always be ready to fight for his son, for his family.

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Masterlist

#writing #writer #Chicago Fire #chicago med #chicago fire imagine #one-shot #oneshot #one shot #One Chicago #Kelly Severide #kelly severide imagine #kelly severide one shot #kelly severide x reader #imagine #chicago fire one shot #drabble

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221bsunsettowers · 4 years

Text

Geralt/Jaskier: All My Thoughts I’ve Been Saving

For @sparklemagpie, who requested the prompt “don’t move, they hit your head really hard.” Thanks for the prompt, I hope you like this!

A note that there is swearing and some blood in this. Also no one dies, I promise (though I can’t promise that the men who go after Jaskier make it out unscatched when Yen and Geralt get back to them!).

Geralt wouldn’t trade the pain in his neck right now for anything. The uncomfortable tilt of his head meant he could keep his gaze on Jaskier’s face while the bard slept on, his head resting on Geralt’s chest, body cradled in the Witcher’s arms, four legs tangled together under the blankets.

This would be their last day together before they split apart for the winter, Geralt to Kaer Morhen, Jaskier to Oxenfurt, and Geralt didn’t have the words he wanted, only the inability to string together the syllables to ask his bard to come with him, not to leave him. So he lay still, taking in every feature of Jaskier’s face, soft and relaxed as he slept.

"Only you could stare quite so loudly, my Witcher," Jaskier murmured with a smile, nuzzling his face into Geralt's neck. Without even looking, he reached up and laid a finger directly across Geralt's mouth. "And don't you start apologizing, Geralt, I adore that you can't keep your eyes off of me." Finger trailing from Geralt's mouth down to right above the start of the blanket, Jaskier sighed, sitting up and running a hand through his rumpled hair. "We should start getting ready. I worry about you making such a long journey already, let alone once winter truly arrives."

Both men sat on opposite sides of the bed now, Geralt gazing at the wall, Jaskier twisting his hands together and apart. Nodding, Geralt tried to turn off awareness of everything but the muscles in his legs, focus only on the action of standing with no emotions or thoughts attached.

He found this so much harder than he used to.

By the time he had started getting dressed, Jaskier was finished, pack and lute slung across his back, and heading for the stairs. "I'll go scavenge up some easy breakfast for the road, meet me downstairs when you're ready," he called over his shoulder, closing the door behind him.

One piece of armor on, the next piece of armor on. Checked swords. Checked swords again. Counted potions even though no spots are empty. Sighing, Geralt looked around the room one last time, eyes lingering on the rumpled bedsheets before he too walked out the door and closed it behind him.

As he descended the stairs, he noticed the tavern nearly empty, the crowd of bodies pressed against the front door, almost knocking each other over to see whatever it was occurring outside. Geralt moved towards the door only because he needed to get outside, not because of any desire to know what the group of early morning drunks and curiousity seekers were staring at.

Until he heard a scream of pain, intense pain, and took off running, barreling through the crowd, not even registering the swearing and stumbling that he left in his wake.

Geralt had seen horror and blood in his lifetime, bodies torn to shreds, innocent children who never even made it out of their beds, but this, this was a thousand times worse, this was the thing that stopped him in his tracks. His instincts stuttered to a stop, his body froze, every lesson that had been beaten into him fleeing from his head.

Because it was Jaskier in front of him, in the middle of the crowd, surrounded by his own circle of men, kicking and punching and stomping on his bard. And there was blood, so much blood. It looked like a battle scene Geralt himself might leave behind when a monster had finally been vanquished. Not all the blood was Jaskier's, that much was clear from the various deep cuts his attackers were covered in. One even had a slash on his arm that went clear through to the bone.

But Jaskier was on the ground, not moving, eyes shut, blood dribbling from the side of his so still mouth, a dagger protuding from his stomach. "Jaskier!" The name burst from Geralt in a growl so terrible it had the men already turning tail to run, in a sob so painful it stunned the crowd into silence. Dropping to his knees next to Jaskier, Geralt gently lifted his head into his lap, horrified to discover more blood surrounding a dent in Jaskier's skull. It took everything he had to swallow the bile rising up into his throat, and the effort made him gasp.

"'alt?" Jaskier mumbled, trying to turn his head towards the sound.

"It's me, Jask, everything's going to be fine," Geralt tried to keep his voice steady, like always, like a Witcher did, but every word was shaking as hard as his hands were. "Don't move, they hit your head really hard."

"They were insulting a Witcher," a woman spoke up suddenly from the crowd still gathered. Geralt could smell the fear radiating off her, but then she looked at him again and he could tell the moment the fear transformed into sadness and sympathy. "They were calling the Witcher a monster, and the young man there, he was packing food into a pouch when they said it to them, and he was immediately on them, he was. He was winning too, I swear he was, until more of their friends came up running to hold him down. They called him a-" The woman paused, blushing, staring down at the ground, her words running together even faster. "They insinuated he-that you and he-together, and he told them he would be so lucky, and that's when the one hit his head with the rock, and the other stabbed him through his stomach, so..." She trailed off, before her next words came out a whisper. "We're right sorry about him, your friend, so we are."

Geralt thought he nodded his head at her in thanks, but he couldn't be sure, every part of his being so completely wrapped up in the weak hold Jaskier now had on him, Jaskier clutching at Geralt's hand with featherlight fingers soaked in red. There would be time for rage later, but now there was only time for Jaskier. "Wouldn't change...not a thing..." Jaskier's voice was fading so fast, but Geralt could hear every gutwrenching word.

"Stay with me, please, stay right here," Geralt begged, pressing his hands over whatever wound looked the worst, but there were so many, and they were all so terrible, his hands were constantly in motion, trembling and slipping. "I need a healer!"

"We don't have one here." Geralt thought it was the same woman again. "Nearest one isn't for miles."

"It's..." The pause between words, between breaths was getting longer, Jaskier was being stretched thin. "It's okay...glad...glad you're here, with me."

"I'm not going anywhere." For the first time in more years than Geralt could remember, he felt tears sliding down his face, faster and faster, landing on Jaskier's doublet and mixing with the endless stream of blood. "And you don't go anywhere either, you stay right here with me."

"I love you," Jaskier gasped out, and his fingers dropped, his eyes closed, and Geralt could feel each of Jaskier's breaths getting shorter, coming slower, and Geralt screamed, the sound erupting from his throat one he could not recognize. He was choking on tears, and growling, and screaming Jaskier's name, and then he was screaming Yennifer's name, ripping the xenovox from his bag.

Geralt knew Yennifer had arrived from the push of magic from behind, and the loud gasp she let out when she saw Jaskier. She immediately knelt down next to the bard, her fingers hovering over his body.

"Please Yen, you have to fix him," Geralt was pleading now, and the look Yennifer gave him was full of sorrow and little hope. "Please, take us to Kaer Morhen, please Yen. He'll be safe there while you heal him."

Nodding, Yennifer tried to smile, but Geralt could see her hands shake as she created the portal. Geralt carefully lifted Jaskier into his arms, cradling his head, supporting his back to not jostle the dagger sticking out of his front. When he took the next step, they were directly outside Kaer Morhen, and there were Witchers running out towards them, but Geralt didn't even register them. Striding past them, he hurried as fast as he dared to his room, gently laying Jaskier out on the bed before turning pleading eyes towards Yennifer.

"You did the right thing not taking the dagger out," Yennifer said, and Geralt gave a tight nod. "But we have to take it out now if we have any chance for the wound to heal."

"It will heal," Geralt said determinedly, and Yennifer laid a hand on his shoulder, squeezing softly.

"Of course," she said, eyes kind, but even she couldn't hide the deep concern that flickered through them. "I need you to hold him down in case he awakens while I'm getting the dagger out. It's not going to be pleasant. We need something to press against the bleeding until I can close the wound too."

Within seconds, Geralt had tossed every blanket and shirt he could find onto the bed next to Jaskier's still form. Outside the room, Vesemir, Lambert, and Aiden had gathered, staring at the scene in front of them in confusion. "What the fuck is going on?" Lambert yelled across at Geralt, but Geralt ignored him completely, climbing onto the bed, wrapping his hands around Jaskier's biceps, pressing his legs against his bard's, and nodded at Yennifer.

"I've got him, Yen," Geralt promised, and she nodded back.

"I know you do," Yennifer said softly, and then took a deep breath, reaching for the dagger. With a swift move, she pulled the dagger out straight, and Jaskier bucked, a scream of pain erupting from his bloodstained lips.

"I'm here, Jaskier, I'm here," Geralt chanted, holding Jaskier down as hard as he dared, resting their foreheads against each other. "You're going to be alright, Yen's here, we're going to take care of you."

Jaskier went limp again, and Geralt turned a panicked gaze at Yennifer, but she forced a smile across her face. "That's good, he won't feel this, it's a good thing Geralt."

Stripping Jaskier's clothes off him, down to his smallclothes, Geralt clenched the destroyed doublet between his fingers. "This was one of his favorites," he said softly, and shook his head quickly, as if trying to jostle the thought out of his mind. Letting the doublet fall to the floor, he grabbed the nearest cloth and pressed it against Jaskier's stomach as the blood spilled out. When one cloth was soaked, he reached for another, and another, continuing on until a shirt came up clean, and he saw Yennifer collapse onto the bed.

"Yen, are you alright?" Geralt called out, looking over to find Yennifer nodding, an exhausted smile on her face. Taking a deep, slow breath, he looked down at Jaskier. His bard's breathing was steady, all blood vanished, skull smooth and whole, stomach marred only by a faint scar. Geralt felt his body sag in relief, adrenaline pouring out of him in waves and leaving him drained and exhausted.

"You saved his life," Yen said, raising herself up enough to squeeze Geralt's shoulder, dipping her head down to meet his eyes with a smile.

"He almost died because of me, Yen," Geralt choked out, running a soft hand through Jaskier's sweat-soaked hair. "Those men, they called him names because he was with me, yelled at him that he was sleeping with a monster-"

"And of course Jaskier did what Jaskier does," Yen said with a fond chuckle. She lowered her voice so the others couldn't overhear, even with their advanced senses. "Geralt, he chose his actions because he loves you, you know that. And you're not at fault for that. If anything, you actively tried to make him hate you first." This startled a chuckle out of Geralt, who smiled fondly down at Jaskier. "Now, I need to go rest up and recover, and then I need to go see some men about choosing to put their dagger in our bard."

"Not without me," Geralt growled, feeling like he could smell the blood all over again. "I need everyone to know what happens if they lay a finger on Jaskier."

"Of course," Yennifer nodded, "I wouldn't expect anything less from you." She took Geralt's hands in hers and squeezed them tightly, before standing up.

Reaching over, she took Jaskier's hand in hers, holding it for a moment before gently placing it back down on the bed and turning to leave.

"Yen," Geralt called, and Yennifer turned around. "Thank you. I wouldn't expect anything less from you either." Yen smiled, and exited the room.

“So he fought them because he didn’t like them saying he was fucking a Witcher?” Lambert spat out, crossing his arms over his chest, and Geralt was suddenly reminded of the others in the room. “Don’t understand why you’d give a fuck about someone who would get the shit kicked out of them just to protect their own damn reputation.” Geralt growled loudly, lunging for Lambert.

“Didn’t like that they called Geralt a monster,” Jaskier mumbled, and the Witchers spun around, Geralt hurrying to the side of the bed , dropping to his knees as he reached for Jaskier. “Really like the fucking, quite proud of that actually.”

“Jaskier,” Geralt’s voice shook as he grabbed Jaskier’s hand, lifting it to his lips.

“Hello dear heart,” Jaskier smiled, leaning into Geralt's touch. "I must admit, I wasn't sure I would see you again."

"Jask, please don't say that, you-I, I couldn't ever..." With a deep sigh, Geralt lowered his face into the crook of Jaskier's neck, inhaling his scent, taking in deep breaths, feeling his body finally starting to relax.

Vesemir ushered the other Witchers away, Lambert calling back with a deep laugh, "Proud of the fucking, I like that, that bard's got balls!"

"Well if he approves," Jaskier said, rolling his eyes, and Geralt laughed, and then just as suddenly he was crying, great heaving sobs soaking Jaskier's skin. "Oh sweetheart, Geralt, my love," Jaskier mumured soothingly, laying kisses on every inch of Geralt he could reach, opening his arms as Geralt crawled onto the bed and carefully wrapped himself around his bard, clinging to him tightly.

"I love you too," Geralt said softly, feeling the answering catch in Jaskier's breath. Propping himself up on his elbows, cupping Jaskier's face in his hands and bringing their lips together, Geralt pressed their foreheads together. "I should have told you that before. I should have asked you to come with me to Kaer Morhen like I wanted to."

"Well, you have me here now," Jaskier teased gently, smiling when he saw the happy crinkle in Geralt's eyes. "There you are, love. My love."

"Yours," Geralt promised, moving away just long enough to drag the heavy fur blanket up from the bottom of the bed and over their bodies, before wrapping himself completely around Jaskier again. Feeling Jaskier relax, breathing evening out into a healing sleep, Geralt let his aching muscles sink into the bed, his head resting over Jaskier's heart. "Forever, Jask. Yours."

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jodiereedus22 · 4 years

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Trapped

A/N: hey guys!!!! thank you so much for all the love on my latest oneshot New Life !!! I was so moved!!!! I hope you all enjoy this one too!!!! as always thank you to @crossbowking for being an amazing support!!!

Word Count: 3111

Warnings: Injury

You had been living in Alexandria for a little while now, long enough to know the people, but probably not long enough to trust them completely.

They were here, at the end of the world, but they survived through luck and good timing, none of these people had seen the brutality of the outside world, and so you were reluctant to call them survivors.

They didn’t know what it was like to go hungry or thirsty but still having to keep moving, they didn’t know what it was like to live with the fear of losing the ones you love, with the fear of losing yourself.

It was easy to succumb to the animalistic nature of the end of the world, to forgo any and all humanity, it was harder to keep both sides, to be brutal, to cut off some humanity, but to be able to find it again, that was when you knew you were a true survivor.

You were lucky to have your family with you, they grounded you and helped you not to lose the survivor in you and the instincts that kept you and your family alive, but they were always there to bring your humanity back.

But living here meant you had to somewhat mingle with the residents, but you kept it to a small circle; Aaron and Eric, they were the first people you had met, that brought you here. Denise, she was the new doctor since Pete was killed and Deanna and her family, she was the leader here, although you still followed Rick. And her family? That only consisted of Spencer now, her husband, Reg, was murdered by Pete and Aiden, her son, was killed on a supply run.

Your saving grace in this world was Daryl Dixon. You had been together for a while now, since the prison. A lot had happened on the road to where you are now, but despite being separated multiple times, you always found your way back to each other again and you both got stronger from it.

You both struggled a bit at the beginning of the transition into the Alexandrian way of life, both with the new life there and the new life together, letting more people see your relationship was something that caused Daryl to try and pull away but you didn’t let him and as always came out stronger the other side.

One of the qualities you loved most about Daryl was his protectiveness, it would be easy to let it constrict you, but you knew there was nothing you could do to stop Daryl protecting you. So you embraced it and you loved him all the more for it.

It was just another “normal” day in Alexandria and you decided you needed to get out for a while so you decided to do a perimeter check.

“By yerself?” Daryl asked worried.

“Yes, by myself, it’s just a perimeter check, I’ll barely be gone an hour,” you reassured Daryl.

He looked into your eyes, deciding if this was a good decision and whether he could let you go.

You stared back at him, giving him the `I’ll be fine look` he’d come to know and accept, he’d come to know there wasn't really any point arguing with you.

Daryl finally relented, stepping in closer to you until there was no more room left, your noses touching from the proximity, placing both of his hands on either side of your face and placed a soft kiss on your forehead.

“Be careful,” Daryl pleaded, looking deep into your eyes.

“Always,” you said with a small smile, placing a quick kiss on his lips and left for the door.

You turned back one last time, seeing a blush creep upon his face all the way to the tops of his ears. You smiled at him, seeing him blush at your actions always made your heart flutter, and with that image in your mind, you walked out of the front door.

Making your way to the gate, you heard someone call out your name.

You stopped and turned around to see Spencer walking towards you.

“Hey, (Y/N), are you heading out?” Spencer asked.

“Yep, about to do a perimeter check,” you answered him.

“I was wondering, could I come with you?” Spencer requested.

“Erm, Spencer, look…” you started.

“I won't get in your way please (Y/N), I need to learn. I've lost so much, I need to be able to defend what I have left,” Spencer implored.

You stood for a moment, you never really liked going out with Alexandrians, they were so inexperienced, a liability, out of the two brothers Spencer was more on an indoor cat, Aiden was the outdoor cat, but he wasn’t here anymore and you understood Spencer's point.

“Fine,” you sighed. “You can come, but stay close and be prepared, I'm not a babysitter. Got it?” you told him sternly.

“Got it,” Spencer said with a victorious grin.

You continued your way to the gate with Spencer in tow.

You liked being out of the walls, it was so much more familiar than being in Alexandria. When no walkers were roaming around the stillness of the forest instilled a sense of calm within you which of course was shattered by bigfoot behind you who, somehow, managed to step on every branch on the floor.

You sighed to yourself, rolling your eyes, wondering to yourself no wonder these people barely left the comfort of their walls.

You got a comfortable distance outside the walls when you started doing your perimeter check.

“Just keep your eyes and ears open for walkers, that’s all you got to do,” you instructed Spencer.

“That’s it? I got this,” Spencer said cockily.

Again, you just rolled your eyes. This is gonna be interesting.

“Just get walking,” you demanded Spencer.

You walked for a while, you were just about halfway around and so far, no walkers to deal with but of course, nothing good ever lasts out here.

Three walkers were skulking around, walkers you had to take out.

“Right, you ready? It's just three, you good?” you asked Spencer.

You could see the slight hesitation in his face.

“Hey, I'm gonna help, I'm right here, this is something you have to learn okay?” you reassured him with a softer tone than you would normally use.

Spencer nodded as you both made your way towards the walkers. You walked slightly ahead of Spencer, a plan formulating in your head. You decided you would take out two of the walkers and leave one for Spencer, that way you could easily intervene if you had to.

You put your hand up signalling Spencer to stop, as he did so you walked straight up to the walkers, drawing them away one by one, putting the first two down quickly and with ease leaving one still hobbling towards you.

You looked back at Spencer.

“All yours, you can handle this,” you stood beside him, nudging him to move forward, with the hint he slowly moved towards the remaining walker.

All of a sudden Spencer stopped with the walker still gaining on him, looking at his body language from behind him you saw one of his feet move backwards.

“Spencer, don’t. Just do it!” you warned him.

But before you could say anything else, he took faster steps back, stumbling towards you in fear, crashing into you, sending you off balance as the walker now made its way to you instead.

You got your knife ready, still a little off-balance, you took the walker out, plunging your knife into its skull but when the walker fell limp it set your already questionable balance straight off sending you falling backwards.

The scream you let out shattered the somewhat serenity of the forest, birds that once occupied the treetops scattered in flight as you looked down your body to see the source of the worst pain you'd ever felt only to see a bear trap encasing your leg, blood seeping out from every tooth hole.

“Oh my god,” you managed to hear Spencer’s voice over the pounding of your heart.

You picked your head up from the ground, the pain striking your body with every movement to see Spencer hovering over you, sheer panic showing across his features.

His face then turned into the back of his head as he started quickly walking away.

“Wait, where are you going?” you screamed at him.

“I… um… I need to go,” spender stuttered.

“What? You can't leave me!” you were in so much pain you didn’t even care that you were begging Spencer for help.

“Help. I'll go get help,” Spencer blurted out, and without another word Spencer ran off, leaving you alone, bleeding out, in the middle of the forest.

“SPENCER!” you screamed once again, but nothing, he was gone.

Your head collapsed onto the ground your energy wearing out.

You didn’t know how long you were there laying on the ground, helpless to everything, when you heard footsteps. Panic set in, knowing you had no way of defending yourself, then you saw who it was.

Daryl.

Daryl walked up to you, crouching down beside you.

“Daryl,” you whispered.

“I'm here, you need to try and get up (Y/N),” Daryl said calmly.

“I can't, I can't move, it hurts too much,” you choked out, tears rolling down your cheeks.

“You need to try, for me,” Daryl begged.

You gathered up any strength you had left as you tried to raise yourself into a sitting position, but as you did the pain spread through your whole body like a raging wildfire as you screamed in pain, collapsing back down to the ground.

“I can't, I'm sorry,” you cried breathlessly, looking over to Daryl to find him gone, he was nowhere to be seen.

“DARYL,” you screamed for him, tears now streaming down your face as you received no answer.

More time passed, the days light slowly fading into dusk, you had lost all sense of time, all sense of being, you couldn’t feel your body anymore, you couldn’t decide if that was a good thing or a bad thing.

When once more footsteps sounded through your ears, you didn’t move you didn’t even open your eyes.

“(Y/N),” you heard your name once more grace the lips of the man you loved.

“Hey, hey, open your eyes for me (Y/N),” Daryl begged, sounded the most distressed you had ever heard him sound as he placed a hand on your cheek.

“You're not real,” you whispered, more to yourself, you couldn't fall into this delusion as you refused to open your eyes.

“I am real (Y/N). I'm righ’ ‘ere,” Daryl spoke softly and reassuringly.

You tentatively and slowly opened your eyes, seeing Daryl looking down at you. You reached a hand out to him, your hand landing on a solid figure, on Daryl's arm.

“You are real,” you whimpered.

“We’re gonna get ya home,” Daryl professed.

It was only then you realised he was not alone, that Glenn was with him, turning your head back to Daryl you nodded.

Daryl disappeared from your vision as he made his way to your leg. You could see their lips moving, but with the pain circulating you couldn't focus on anything until a sudden pain shot up from your leg seeing Glenn and Daryl trying to free you from the trap.

“Please, please don’t, it hurts, you pleaded through the tears.

“Okay, okay (Y/N), you're gonna be okay,” Daryl comforted you.

“We’re gonna lift ya, okay? It’s gonna hurt, but ya gotta be brave for a little while okay?” Daryl informed you.

You nodded, you saw Daryl move to your head and Glenn to your legs as they counted down from three and lifted you up, constant pain throbbing throughout all of your body as you finally found yourself on a solid surface, the bed of the truck.

The air that blew past you was somewhat comforting, but the main source of comfort was Daryl's hand in yours, the warmth of his hand giving you a sense of home, it calmed you like a balm as Daryl kept a watchful eye over you.

The comfort soon disappearing as you were once again being carried this time into the infirmary. You were placed tenderly down on the bed as people rushed around you.

Daryl's hand still firmly gripped in yours carried on providing as much comfort as it could as Denise spoke.

“We need to get this off of her. Glenn, Rick both grab a side of the trap. Daryl, you hold her down.” Denise instructed.

Everyone rushed into their positions, dread setting down deep in your stomach.

“It’s gonna be okay, you're gonna be okay,” Daryl whispered to you so only you could hear as he placed a soothing kiss on your forehead.

The countdown to three, you knew, would only lead to severe pain, but nothing could prepare you for this pain, feeling Rick and Glenn pry the trap off your leg, feeling like they were pulling your leg off at the same time, you could feel everything, the numb feeling you once felt disappeared as your vision went blurry and you started shaking.

“(Y/N),” Daryl exclaimed catching everyone's attention, but to you, everything sounding as though you were underwater, all you could hear were sounds, nothing specific, your vision speckled like a static tv.

“She's going into shock. Maggie grab some pillows and that silver blanket,” Denise ordered as Rick and Glenn placed the trap onto the floor and Denise put pressure on your leg.

“Daryl wrap this around her,” Denise directed him, he places the blanket around your shaking form, hands lingering on your body wanting so much to do more to help you.

“I've got to elevate her legs,” Denise said as she kept the pressure on your leg at the same time as placing a stack of pillows under your legs.

Denise didn’t say another word as she went about sewing up your wounds, it was a long arduous procedure, but a success. You came out of the shock and you were stable, unconscious, but stable.

“She's gonna be okay Daryl, she was lucky, I managed to save her leg, but she’ll need lots of rest and physio when she's able,” Denise informed Daryl.

“Thank you,” Daryl said gratefully.

Daryl looked down at your unconscious form, feeling relief at your recovery but feeling anger at this happening to you, without being able to control himself he marched out of the infirmary, fuming, knowing exactly where he needed to go. He didn’t get far before Rick was standing in front of him, Rick’s hands placed on both of Daryl's shoulders.

“Daryl you need to calm down,” Rick told him, staring him down.

“Nah you heard what Denise said, she was lucky to keep her leg let alone her life. I'm gonna kill ‘im,” Daryl declared, trying to make his way past Rick.

Rick followed him and got into the exact same position as a moment ago, trying to block Daryl’s path.

“But she is okay Daryl, she's gonna be okay,” Rick reassured Daryl.

“She could’a died, she nearly did, you wan’ me ta jus’ let tha’ go,” Daryl ranted his voice getting louder with every word.

“No. I want you to go back in there and be with her while I sort this out,” Rick told Daryl.

Daryl paused for a second, letting everything sink in, he wanted nothing more than to be by your side, he also wanted to beat the living shit out of Spencer.

He peered at Rick, he trusted him to deal with Spencer, it wouldn't be in the same way Daryl had planned to deal with him, but he needed to be with you.

He nodded to Rick and headed back into the infirmary. seeing you lying there, your leg heavily bandaged broke his heart. He should have gone with you, if he had known Spencer had tagged along with you, he would have gone with you, or wouldn’t have let you go.

He sat in the chair next to your bed linking his hand with yours as he gently grasped a piece of hair that had fallen over your face and tucked it behind your ear as he heard a soft whimper come from you.

Looking down he saw your eyes start to flutter open.

“Daryl?” You asked out.

“I'm here,” Daryl answered.

“Is it still there?” you asked him, scared to know the answer, or even to look, all you knew right now was that whatever painkillers Denise gave you had your whole body numb.

Daryl looked slightly confused at you.

“My leg. Is it still there?” You clarified, starting to tear up at the possible answer.

“Yes (Y/N), you're gonna be jus’ fine,” Daryl informed you.

“I'm sorry,” Daryl blurted out.

“It wasn’t your fault,” you told him, once again Daryl carrying the guilt on his shoulders as always.

“I should’a been there,” Daryl admitted.

“You were,” you told him, gripping onto his hand harder.

“Not quickly enough,” Daryl confessed.

“No, I saw you. I know it wasn’t real now, but you came to me, in my heart and in my mind, Daryl you're always here with me,” you declared.

Daryl leaned forward and placed a soft kiss on your lips as you felt a tear land on your cheek.

As Daryl pulled away you took his face in your hands, wiping away the tears that he had shed.

“I love ya (Y/N),” Daryl professed.

“I love you too Daryl,” you reciprocated.

A couple of days had passed, and you were finally strong enough to leave the infirmary and continue your recovery at the home that you and Daryl shared.

“Let's get ya home,” Daryl said as he went to lift you up.

“I can walk Daryl, well hobble at least,” you said with a smirk on your face.

“Ya don’ have ta,” Daryl told you, picking you up bridal style and started walking you back to your house.

“My hero,” you flirted with him, placing a kiss on his cheek and watching a blush once again creep upon his face as he smiled down at you.

You always knew you and Daryl would be together, but this experience, more than any of the others, showed you that both psychically and spiritually. Daryl would always be your rock, your comfort, your home and you wouldn’t have it any other way and knowing Daryl felt the exact same way made this whole new world bearable. Daryl would love you for the rest of your lives together and you would love him

Please, like, comment and reblog!!! I'd love to hear peoples thoughts!! Thank you!!

Taglist: @crossbowking @seiraswriting @viraloutbreakcontrol @coffee-obsessed-writer @bluesfortheredj @shutupimtryin2write @fearthewalkingbitch @selenedixon @cbarter @cole-winchester@alyisdead @hopplessdreamer @infinitewcr @blogsporadicartist-blog @mtngirlforever @sassi-luna @twdsunshine @momc95 @emo-potato-virgil @sourwolf-sterek32 @tatertot1097 @wilhelmjfink @coffeebooksandfandom @twdeadfanfic @cutiepiemimi13 @kickin-with-dixon@feartheendlesssummer @twdeadlysins @apocalypse-haven @baseballbitch116 @trashcanband4 @mblaqgi @addiction-surivior25 @mel-2a @spaghettyrogers@xxboesefrauxx @sapphire1727 @little-miss-mischief1 @wontlookaway @bunnymother93 @auntiebyn @saintsisterwriter @theunofficialduke @Lilo-1988 @imaginecrushes

#daryl dixon x reader #daryl x reader #daryl dixon #DarylDixon #daryl dixon fanfic #twd daryl #The Walking Dead #the walking dead fanfiction #twd #twd daryl dixon #walking dead fanfiction #daryldixonfanfiction #dixon #reader insert

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certifiedceraunophile · 3 years

Note

Hey Srishti!

For the Salty Asks Game: 7, 14, 16 (TVD), and 20!

Go forth and declare your most salty and sweet opinions!

Hiiiiii GABBY 💜

Alright you want the shade + salt, Imma just be that bitch real quick and go OFF.

7. Is there anything you used to like but can’t stand now?

oh lmao I wouldnt have been able to understand this question yesterday, but like today I was again hunting scenes for gifs, and I found that Marcel actually holds no appeal to me, in fact, If Elijah decided to slap his head off, I wouldnt have minded at all. Also I was a forwood shipper at the time but now I look at them and have this inexplicable urge to scratch something.

14. Unpopular opinion about your fandom?

OK might get whacked around for this, but there is this one VERY prevalent image or like characterization Klaus gets in the fanon part of this fandom I absolutely cannot stand and somehow that is always the most popular characterization and I'm just like babes, please leave the crazy alone, why tf are you trying to tame him?? we don't need that, go and stan matt or something if you wanna "redeem" this man into a new "good" man who Caroline brings into her "light" like ok, fair, but where is the appeal?? fuck shit up please, Imma need that man to stay psychotic and murderous ok, I cannot stand Klaus who strays from evil to moral and just territory bc of Caroline, show me Caroline who strays from her morality bc of Klaus goddamnit but then again this is just me and my need for shithead Klaus plucking out a heart for fun with one hand and drawing Caroline in with the other for a sweet kiss, so as you said this is just my opinion, and anybody who is into the redeeming arc is obviously just as valid as me in stanning Klaus and I am glad their muse found the inspiration to make their vision come true.

16.If you could change anything in the show, what would you change?

Gabby Kinda offended that you even asked this question when I have been screaming at random strangers on the internet for MONTHS now that I will rather sacrifice oreos [and I love these mfs harder than I did my last bf so mind you this be a BIG Statement right there] than accept the baby plot as my personal canon, I legit wanted Hayley to a) die or b) die and preferably at Klaus hands thanks.

20.What is the purest ship in the fandom?

(I have already answered this so I'll just copy paste the answer!)

Josh and Aiden?? Bonnie and Enzo I think?? idk I dont actually care about pure ships lmao like sure theyre cute and all but I cant get invested in one yk, nothing much to invest in when it's already all perfect and *pure*

this is the ask game

#HIIII GABBY #Yk I adore ya girl #salty asks #keep up the great job at your paper #✨🌼🤝🏾💖💜

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jaskiersvalley · 3 years

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Someone For The Road

@lil-bleater-promptweek had a prompt up for Day 2 which I just couldn’t resist. Lil Bleater, Goat Witcher was just too good an idea to leave.

Title: Someone For The Road Rating: T Relationships: minor Lambert/Aiden, minor Geralt/Jaskier, Eskel/Cahir Prompt: Day 2, Lil Bleater, Goat Witcher Content Warnings: None Summary: Wolves weren’t meant to slink down the Path alone. While the others had found their own companions, Eskel needs a little assistance from Vesemir.

Like most idiot decisions, some strong moonshine was involved in the one the forms the basis of this tale. It doesn’t start, as one would think, with Lambert. No, this decision begins on an early spring evening. The ground was still wet with rain but the snow had long since gone and so had the heart of Kaer Morhen, sent out on the Path for another year. Vesemir was left alone in the old keep, tending to the chicken, goats and the grouchy donkey he sometimes took on a supplies run. The first couple of weeks without his pups was always the hardest and Vesemir was always grateful that Lambert left behind a fair amount of his homebrew. As unhealthy as it was, it helped Vesemir get through the worst of the initial loneliness.

That particular year it was unusually rough to be left on alone again. For the winter months Kaer Morhen had been alive with happiness. Geralt had brought his bard who sang as often as he could, filling the halls with his songs. Plus, Lambert had finally dragged his Cat home and those two were trouble in every sense of the word. Plus Yennefer had arrived with Ciri and it felt so very much like a family. The only odd one out was Eskel. That wasn’t to say he was an outsider looking in, he most definitely had a hand in a good portion of Lambert and Aiden’s shenanigans, also helped Ciri prank Geralt and joined in with everything, even Jaskier’s singing. Despite this, Vesemir couldn’t knock the image of them all leaving out of his head. Geralt had Jaskier bouncing along next to him, singing, Lambert had an arm slung around Aiden’s shoulder, Yennefer portalled off with Ciri. The only solitary figure was Eskel, leading Scorpion down the trail. In terms of horse years, Scorpion was getting on, especially for a Witcher’s horse. There was a worry in Vesemir that Eskel would return home for winter completely alone.

After a few hours of fretting and drinking, one of the goats amble in and butted Vesemir’s leg. The little sod was always getting into trouble and breaking in, all because Eskel had spoilt her rotten over the last few months. As she stubbornly nudged Vesemir again, an idea blossomed. While Vesemir couldn’t find him a human companion, he could damn well help make him an animal one that could weather the Path. Lil Bleater was only a yearling, born the previous spring so in the prime of her life. She would be perfect. Scooping her up under one arm, Vesemir staggered down to the rooms he had avoided for decades. There were still bottles there and he could just about remember the process. He would make Eskel a worthy companion!

Waking up with a headache was never good. Vesemir groaned and then groaned again at the realisation that he was in the room he swore he’d never set foot in again. Even worse, there was a goat staring at him patiently, chewing on the remains of a strap from one of the beds.

“Fuck.”

Never was Vesemir drinking again. He stared at Lil Bleater who seemed radiant in her health, well toned muscles, eyes bright, fur shiny. She also turned out to be an absolute menace. When Vesemir ushered her out into the courtyard with the stables, she charged at the closed door and skidded to a satisfied halt in the kitchen, wood from the door in a halo around her.

“Fuck.”

The rest of the year was spent trying to train Lil Bleater. Her mission was a simple one.

“You keep Eskel company. Keep him safe. And find him someone crazy enough to want to travel with him.”

Come winter, Vesemir didn’t want to admit what he had done. However, Lil Bleater hadn’t aged a day in the year and looked far too healthy. And there was no denying that she could and would charge through wood and stone if she wanted something. Vesemir had resorted to installing flaps in the lower half of the doors to give her access without having to constantly fix doors and walls.

“She’s yours,” he said to Eskel with great simplicity. It was true too, while Vesemir had been the one to transform Lil Bleater and train her, Eskel was the one who had loved her and she loved him in turn. The next spring Eskel set out with Scorpion on one side and Lil Bleater living up to her name and giving gentle screams of happiness at being allowed to follow him.

As Vesemir always knew, she excelled at her role. The following year Lil Bleater burst out from the trail with a happy bleat at being home. Behind her, Eskel was leading Scorpion and another, black mare was behind him. Hidden between the horses was a new arrival who Lil Bleater circled and nudged towards Vesemir for inspection.

“Vesemir,” Eskel said softly, “this is Cahir. Lil Bleater adopted him and hasn’t let him leave.”

“Like you’d want me to go,” Cahir said, giving Eskel an amused look. “You’re as bad as her and I have the handfasting ribbon to prove it.”

Eskel went a little red at that but Vesemir knew it was a happy embarrassment. He nodded at Cahir in welcome.

“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I think I have to reward Lil Bleater for completing her first contract.”

#eskhir #eskel/cahir #minor lambert/aiden #minor geralt/jaskier #eskel #vesemir #lil bleater #Cahir Mawr Dyffryn aep Ceallach #lilbleaterprompts #tldr: vesemir makes lil bleater a witcher

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buffyversefanfiction · 3 years

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Buffy versus The Originals

Warnings: I do not own nor claim to own the copyrights to the following tv shows; “Buffy the vampire slayer”, “Angel”, “The Originals”, “The Vampire Diaries”. Nor do I claim to own any canonical continuation via comics, spin-off televisions and such. I do not claim to own any of the characters within either the Buffyverse or the TVDverse, I am purely doing this for non-profit as a fan of both worlds and fanfiction itself.

15 Plus: May contain medium to graphic displays of violence and torture, displays of witchcraft practice, horror elements, supernatural elements, sexual innuendos, and scenes of a sexual nature.

F/F, F/M, M/M, GEN + OTHER

Preliminary Round: Part One

Buffy Summers managed to stop yet another apocalypse not that there was ever any doubt that she would win, she always wins. Although, to be fair this time around her hometown of Sunnydale was destroyed during the big battle and what once was a beautiful Californian town looked like nothing more than a tribute to the Grand Canyon leaving Buffy and her friends homeless.

Luckily, the blonde-haired vampire slayer knew of a certain vampire with a soul called Angel who happened to live in a semi-decaying hotel located in Los Angeles, and after a quick and awkward phone call with the vampire she once loved Buffy, her friends, her loved ones, and her fellow slayers made their way to L.A. to seek refuge with Angel and his team at the Hyperion Hotel.

Angel well and truly had his hands full at the Hyperion Hotel after rejecting Wolfram and Hart’s offer, his city always kept him busy with its many supernatural creatures, but he also had the complicated mission of trying to wake the woman he loved from her supernaturally influenced coma.

So, when Buffy, his former love, called him up looking for a place to stay briefly he was more than willing to oblige, hoping Buffy and her team could help in waking Cordy up.

Cordelia Chase had gone from being a spoiled rich girl at Sunnydale High School, to the vision’s girl at Angel Investigations to a half human, half demon, hybrid that found herself getting possessed by a rogue member of the powers that be called Jasmine, the latter using a magical pregnancy to give birth to herself, sending Cordy into a coma shortly after giving birth.

Cordelia was the heart of Angel Investigations and it was struggling to operate without her, her friends and loved ones, were struggling to cope without her and so, Angel, Wesley, Fred, and Gunn were more than thrilled to have guests at the hotel who could lend a helping hand.

Faith Lehane had also gone through many changes herself, going from being a rogue slayer pitting herself up against Buffy, to finding redemption with the help and patience of Angel. So, after becoming Buffy’s ally once again, and helping her defeat the first in Sunnydale, the brunette Boston born slayer was more than happy to check into the Hyperion Hotel and catch up with her old friend Angel, especially after hearing the tall, dark, and handsome, vampire with a soul, needed help in waking Cordelia from a coma.

Buffy, Angel, and both their teams, sure proved to be the big help that Angel Investigations needed with the night-to-night hunting, and patrolling, however, the mission to awake Cordelia Chase struggled to pick up momentum which Cordelia herself began to grow impatient about as her fragmented spirit began appearing to them all frequently, complaining, and eager to get back into her comatose body.

Willow Rosenberg searched every grimoire, book, and magic shop to find a magical solution to Cordelia’s coma until eventually she came up with the idea to cast a spell which would not only summon Cordelia’s spirit but would force said spirit to return to her body. The spell in question required a non-beating heart, horns from a near extinct demonic species, and the translation of a long-forgotten language.

Willow waited for a reasonably quiet night to perform the spells she believed would bring Cordelia back to her body, waiting until it was just her, Buffy, Angel, and Faith in the hotel and gathered them all within the grand foyer of the hotel, as they each sat down on the floor in a circle, while Willow held a book in her hands, ready to cast her magic, ready to bring Cordelia Chase back.

The first spell to summon Cordelia’s spirit was performed, cast, and executed to perfection by the brilliant red headed wonder witch, however, the second spell to return Cordelia to her comatose body went a little awry as Willow accidentally opened a portal to a whole other dimension, a portal which wound up pulling Cordelia’s spirit into, as well as Buffy, Angel, and Faith before closing itself and leaving Willow completely alone, and without any idea of where they went, or how to get her friends back.

“Way to go Wills, now where the hell did, she send us this time?” Faith wondered as she, Buffy, Angel, and Cordelia found themselves, picking themselves up off the ground within the bayou in New Orleans late at night, each of them completely confused as to where Willow’s spell had sent them to. “I think it is safe to say we’re definitely not at the Hyperion Hotel, and knowing our luck we’re probably not even in Los Angeles.” Buffy replied to her, as she looked around the bayou, attempting to piece together where they were. “Hey! I’m back to being solid again!” Cordelia screeched with excitement as she threw her arms around Angel and pulled him in for a hug, the two of them equally as excited to see and feel each other once again. “Enough of the sickeningly sweet reunion time, we all know what happens when you get happy Angel.” Faith warned Angel, as she pulled him out of Cordelia’s arms, eagerly breaking off their hug. “You’ll lose your soul, then Cordy becomes food to soulless you, and me and B wind up tossing a coin to see which slayer takes you down this time around. “Well at least Willow’s spell to put you back in your body clearly worked.” Buffy stated to Cordelia, before the questioning slayer turned her attention to Angel. “You did not store her body in the woods, did you?” “No, I never!” Angel denied nervously, as he noticed a disapproving glare from Cordelia. “Not like you can blame him if he did, I mean maybe the big man’s still a little pissed about you bumping uglies with his son, I mean did you not used to change his diapers?” Faith teased Cordelia, more than happy to stir the pot between Cordelia and Angel. “Firstly, that was some wacky super powered bitch called Jasmine who not only hijacked my body but got me pregnant just to give birth to herself. Secondly, I would never sleep with his son when not possessed…stupid rogue powers that be hussy!” Cordelia snapped back at Faith, clearly disgusted. “I swear those powers that be can go straight to hell!” “As fun as this is, how about we change the topic and find a way back to the hotel?” Angel suggested to the women, more than eager to change the conversation about his son Connor’s past with the woman he loved. “Yeah, I don’t really want to hear about my ex’s love triangle with my high school classmate and his adult son.” Buffy agreed with the brooding vampire. “Straight to hell, you hear me?” Cordelia screamed upwards towards the clouds, hoping the powers that be were listening and heard her fury. As the foursome decided to explore their whereabouts it did not take them very long to find their way out of the bayou and learn that they were in the city of New Orleans, the only thing they did not know was the fact that they were no longer in their world, they were now in the Mikaelsons’ world…

Preliminary Round: Part Two

Josh Rosza had been through a lot since turning into a vampire, going from being a club kid turned vampire to best friend to the young harvest witch Davina Claire to the boyfriend of werewolf Aiden, but the hardest change in his life that he had to adjust to was losing his first love at the hands of a wicked witch called Dahlia, a loss that at first he blamed Klaus Mikaelson for.

Josh was never particularly popular with any of the original family of vampires and neither did he want to be, knowing all too well that friends of the Mikaelson siblings tended to quickly turn into foes before winding up permanently dead at their hands but all that had changed over the last few months following the notorious family defeating Dahlia.

Following Camille O Connell’s unexpected departure from New Orleans, Josh had managed to take over her job bartending at Rousseau’s which meant dealing with all kinds of clientele including none other than the hybrid Klaus Mikaelson himself, who had become a regular while drowning his sorrows every night since Cami had left.

Fear was quickly taken over by fascination as Josh’s reluctance to grow close to any original began to dwindle as friendship quickly grew between Josh and Klaus, a friendship which had started out with two lonely hearts before developing into something much deeper, a bond truly cherished by them both.

Klaus Mikaelson tended not to make friends easily mostly due to the fact he did not want to and even when the original hybrid did make the occasional friend it was never too long before he either watched them be murdered or they displeased him in some kind of way leading to him killing them.

However, following Cami’s decision to leave New Orleans behind for good, the fact Hayley Marshall had moved away with his daughter Hope and his brother Elijah was not currently talking to him, Klaus was in need of some kind of company and he found that and more with newbie vamp turned bartender Joshua Rosza.

Klaus found himself spending more and more time with Josh as a regular at Rosseau’s until the two unlikely companions quickly found themselves developing a friendship made from two lonely hearts graduating into something deeper and before long the original hybrid would come to think of the vampire bartender as his best friend, a friendship which Klaus valued greatly and would protect at any cost.

Rebekah Mikaelson had been granted her freedom from always having to be by her brother’s side, forced to endure heartbreak after heartbreak as Klaus put his needs and wants before her own time and time again, but now she was free and yet it did not feel like it to the original female vampire.

Rebekah had been travelling the world in search of a way to bring her brother Kol back, chasing leads from her older sister Freya, hoping to find some magical remedy to restore her family, but as the months went by and the leads grew thinner the original was starting to run out of steam and her warring brothers Klaus and Elijah was doing anything but making her feel free from her family entanglements.

So, Rebekah decided it was time to pay her family a little visit to reconcile Elijah and Klaus’ brotherhood having had to step in many times before, like when they thought over Tatia then squabbled over Katherine Pierce, as the blonde haired immortal beauty just found herself being thankful that this time her brothers weren’t fighting over another bloody doppelgänger.

Elijah Mikaelson had spent a thousand years sticking by his brother Klaus’ side, cleaning up his messes, and attempting to keep the rest of his family in line but after Klaus used their aunt Dahlia to cast a werewolf curse on Hayley, the woman he loved, he was done fighting by his brother’s side and although Hayley forgave Klaus after New Orleans’ regent witch Davina Claire broke the curse, Hayley decided to move away with Hope.

Hayley Marshall still popped into New Orleans as her and Klaus shared custody over their daughter Hope but she lived there no longer and although she did not live far from the city she lived far enough away to start a new life, a life that Elijah Mikaelson was no longer a part of much to his own heartbreak.

Elijah knew he could not blame Klaus entirely for Hayley’s decision to move but he also knew the curse sure did not help things, in fact if anything he believed it determined her decision and with her now gone and Rebekah too, Elijah was running out of reasons to remain forever by Klaus’ side.

Freya Mikaelson had taken to the oldest sibling role a little far too well and she had started to feel the weight that came keeping a family like hers from killing each other. Not only did the Mikaelson witch have to play mediator between a warring Elijah and Klaus but she was also using her expertise to try and help her youngest sibling Rebekah to find a way to resurrect Kol.

Family was not Freya’s only struggle however as she tried to stop Davina Claire and her vampire father figure Marcel Gerard from declaring war on her siblings every other day, while finding unlikely common ground with Vincent Griffiths in restoring their city for the better as well as keeping her promise to her brother Finn, one that meant finding him a suitable body that would require minimal violence if possible.

Freya literally had everything on her shoulders and was trying her hardest to wear it well, so the last thing that she wanted, needed, or even expected, was the arrival of two so-called vampire slayers, a demon, and a vampire with a so-called soul.

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