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#and I’ve finally snapped. I’m not putting up with it anymore
simplysummers · 2 years
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#tw sui attempt#this is about to get real ranty and I’ll probably end up deleting this later but I’m really upset#so yesterday my stepdad and i got into an argument because he yelled at me on the stairs because he playfully went to push by me and I#replied completely neutrally with ‘I’m sorry I’m not really in the mood can I get by?’#he proceeded to shove me and scream about how moody I always am and how I’m the one bringing animosity into the household. he has a habit#this. i got very upset to a point where my older brother had to calm me down outside. he ended up going out and I calmed down#my stepdad has an awful habit of being very rude to people including me both my brothers and even my mom#and I’ve finally snapped. I’m not putting up with it anymore#he is one of the key reasons for my extreme self criticism and I’m not dealing with it now#I’m almost 19 years old. i will not be spoken to like this.#and so today he’s come into my room demanding an apology from me. and I very calmly explained that while I wasn’t going to ruin my moms#birthday (which is on Friday) that we would not be on speaking terms before and after the event until he can admit how he’s treating me is#out of order. he constantly deflects whenever he does something wrong and he can never swallow his pride and apologise#there was an incident in November where he told me it was my fault my mother had anxiety and if she got worse he would blame it on me#because I was ‘crazy’. that same day I left my house and headed straight for our overpass because I couldn’t handle the guilt#i was talked out of it by my bio dad who I called on the phone. he picked me up and held me close and my eyes are welling with tears just#thinking about it. it was a terrifying experience as a suicide survivor from last February#am I out of order for this? wanting respect from the man who has been in my life since I was 3. who is married to my mom who I love with my#whole heart? i keep claiming to not be perfect. I’m my own worst critic and yet he parades himself as the victim because I’m finally#standing up to him#and Idk where to go from here
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fizzlehead · 1 year
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GODDDD i just miss being able to watch new episodes of riverdale live and have FUN with them. i remember watching the josie and the pussycats episode in my tiny single dorm room with like 5 of my friends packed onto my twin bed and when archie kissed kevin on the cheek we all ERUPTED in a screaming fit. and then a few weeks later we all did the same thing with the next to normal episode and again like when charles burst into the room singing we stood up and cheered like our sports team had just scored a touchdown or whatever. and even though i didn’t really like s6 very much it STILL had moments like these in the majority of episodes. but now every week i watch it alone in my bed on my laptop and i spend the entire time brain rottingly bored at best and genuinely upset and angry at worst. like what happened i miss riverdale!!!! :(
#i just feel nothinggggggg anymore it makes me actually want to burst into tears. riverdale nights used to be the most exciting nights of my#week and now i forget it’s even airing until like an hour before it starts. feels fucking bad man#not to keep beating a dead horse about how much i hate this season like I know I’ve made it clear. last night just really really did#something to me man. and it’s because they mentioned stonewall prep and i got SO excited because I was like ok FINALLY they’re gonna give me#a moment thag makes me stand up and yell like I used to be able to do. they’re gonna put bret on my screen and I’m gonna scream and run into#the other room to tell my sister about it and it’s gonna be fun and it’s gonna feel like how I’m used to feeling while watching this show.#but then they were like hey here’s two made up stonewall preppies who you’ve never seen or heard about before and who yoh certainly don’t#care about. that’s what you want right. and i literally think something in my brain snapped. irreparably#so now I’m just sitting here thinking about how the time of my life hen I got to watch my favorite show with my friends every week and jump#up and down and scream and laugh and cheer every 5 minutes is over and im never gonna get to do that again. which is awesome <3#this is so fucking melodramatic i know im sorry it’s just that I’ve snapped like I said. something happened last night & now im busted#but anyways. how are you guys doing#taylor xoxo
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sserasin · 27 days
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ruination
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cw nsfw under cut, noncon, dead dove do not eat, female reader, degradation, car sex, use of degrading names (fucktoy, slut, cumdump), choking, overstimulation, heeseung cums inside.
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“what did you fuckin’ expect?” heeseung grunts, your hair wrapped around his fist as he pulls your body up against his, breath hitting your ear. your eyes are squeezed shut, small whimpers escaping your mouth the harder heeseung slams into you. “going around and wearing shit like that? wanna go show off your ass and tits to a bunch of horny fuckers, might as well give you what you wanted.”
“hee—heeseu—” a loud cry leaves your lips when he gives a swift but just as hard smack to your ass, barely even able to feel the sting from the millionth time he’s done this.
“shut the fuck up,” he pushes your head back down into the backseat, “fucktoys don’t talk.”
squeezing your eyes shut tighter didn’t do anything for your tears, just pushing them out even quicker. if you could think of something happier… but the feeling of him stuffing you full was overwhelming, making you lose grasp of reality.
“you can’t fool me,” heeseung hisses your name through gritted teeth, as if he’s even disgusted to say your name, “saying you’re a virgin… no virgin would be easily sucking me in like this.”
your head turns to the side, revealing your teary eyes with tears rushing down your cheeks, “heeseung, p-please, stop. i-it hurts!”
“‘cause you like it like that,” he huffs, hips snapping into yours at a brutal pace. “like all dirty sluts do. you like to be put in your place, you like the pain. i know you do.”
you gasp out in a mix of mortification and pleasure as the head of his cock kisses your cervix. heeseung notices, chuckling as he pulls out without warning and flips you over, quick to push himself back in your wet, puffy cunt. you whimper at the intrusion, blinking back tears as you keep your eyes on the necklace that swings from his neck in your face.
“see, i knew you liked it,” he whispers, leaning down to press his lips to yours only for you to turn your head to the side so his mouth was against your cheek. his brow raises, slowly thrusting in and out of you but with enough force to make your entire body move. “i suggest you let me kiss you.”
with tears streaming down your cheeks, you turn and keep still as he moves his lips against yours, not all caring that you weren’t responding to the kiss. he was right. you were a dirty slut, weren’t you? you had to be— how else could you be this wet?
heeseung pulls back, glee in his eyes, “i’ve always wanted to do that.” his eyes then darken, “but you never gave me the time of day, did you?” you didn’t notice his hand had moved to your collarbone, slowly increasing your anxiety as his hand finally rests on your neck. his rings are cold around your burning hot neck. he doesn’t squeeze, not yet. “stupid slut was always busy fucking around with her friends’ boyfriends and giving fuck me eyes to all the wrong guys.”
your eyes widen, “no, no,” you attempt to shake your head, but his hand tightens around your neck. your eyes dart to his necklace again, trying to copy the calm swing and repeat it with your breathing. up, in. down, out. but it’s your mistake— heeseung’s grip keeps getting tighter and tighter.
“i told you, you can’t fool me,” heeseung says, eyes burning a hole straight through you. you’re letting out choked gasps, but it only has his cocking twitching inside you.
dots begin to blur your vision, chest tightening with the squeeze on your neck. your walls tighten around his cock in retaliation, making him groan before letting go of your neck and lifting your leg up over his shoulder. there’s a burning in your thigh, but it doesn’t matter when your vision isn’t just colors anymore and all you see is a blurred heeseung over you.
“i’m going to ruin you and that perfect fucking image of yours,” he snaps his hips up, immediately slamming into your g-spot. your hands clutch at the top of the car seat, squeezing your eyes shut and biting down on your lip. think of something else. not his cock hammering repeatedly into you, not the tightening in your stomach or your legs trembling. you wish you could focus on the necklace again.
you cream around his cock, a weak whimper finally leaving your mouth. but heeseung continues to fuck you, his thick cock dragging against your walls. the pleasure soon turned into pain again, grunts coming from his lips as your hand weakly tries to push him away, “ah, ah, heeseu— stop! ‘t’s too fast, please—“ you weakly sob out, but not a tear leaves your eyes. you wonder if you’ve cried all your tears out.
“shut up,” he groans, hips snapping up to hit the soft spongy spot with each word, “and lay there and fucking take it.” his hand comes to grip your jaw, pulling you into a kiss as his thrusts become weak and sloppy. “f—fuck, i’m go—going to fill you up with my cum,” he grunts making your eyes widen.
“wh—what?” you stammer, fists trying to punch him away again. “heeseung, don’t—”
“ruin y—you for all oth—other guys,” he continues like you’re not even talking, writhing under him for him to get off. “no guy wants a fucking cumdump as their girlfriend,” he grits out, bottoming out in you with a low groan and releases inside of you with three quick squirts. his head is thrown back, ecstasy shown on his face as he pants above you.
you watch him through lidded eyes, hoping this was it. he was done with you. you could go get plan b, and forget this day ever happened.
heeseung’s head lowers, dark eyes settling on you and dread begins to fill your chest again. you can feel his cock hardening in you again, a squeak leaving your lips as it stretches out your abused walls.
“i’m not done with you yet,” he whispers in your ear, pressing a soft kiss under your jaw. it feels misleading. “i told you i was going to ruin you.”
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Training
Pairing: Simon "Ghost" Riley x gf!reader
Word Count: 600
Warnings: simon being slutty n walking around in grey sweatpants, playfighting, minor smut, mentions to sex
Summary: Simon teaches you to fight.
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After the attack on you, Simon became panicked. 
The more he loved you, the more people would use you as his weakness. He knew one thing. 
He wouldn’t always be there to protect you. 
So you would have to know how to protect yourself. 
So there he was. Moving the sofa in your shared apartment, creating a bit of space. He laid down a throw blanket. It was small, but it would work. He was shirtless, in just his grey sweatpants. 
You, however, stood off to the side, watching him move your pullout sofa with little effort. You take a deep breath as he calls you into the makeshift fighting ring.
“Okay, lovie,” he starts. “Hit me. As har’ as you can.”
You throw a weak punch at his chest. He doesn’t even blink. 
“Lovie, what the absolute fuck was ‘at?”
“A punch…”
“Lovie, ‘at wasn’t even a poke. Try again.”
You hit him again, a bit harder. His chest is like a rock. You pull your hand back after the impact, wincing as your first stings. “Ow! You’re like wood! That’s not fair!”
“Yer doing everythin’ wron’.”
You pout at his words, “I’ve never fought before…I’m just…I don’t wanna do this anymore.”
He shakes his head, “Too bad. Lovie, ‘m doin’ this for you. Now, come on, I’ll show ya.” He fixes your posture, “Keep tension here. Pull your first back. Shift your weight onto this foot.”
You shift, “This is hard.”
“Learn,” he puppets you, throwing a faux punch with your hand. “Like that.” 
You throw a better punch, finally making him stumble. Just slightly. 
“That was better. Again.”
He teaches you numerous kicks, punches, and even a way to hold a person and put pressure on their neck. He tells you to demonstrate, to hit him, but your eyes are focused on something else. 
His abs.
His arms look so good, so huge. His abs glisten with the smallest amount of sweat. He looks so good.
“Lovie,” he snaps in front of your face. “Oi. Focus.”
Your eyes snap up to his, “You’re distracting me.” 
“Am I?” he flexes. 
You gasp, “Asshole.”
He smiles, “Deal with i’. Now come on, we have work to do.”
“Fine,” You strip off your shirt, your bra hugging your tits. “Let’s go.”
His eyes lock on your tits. 
You chuckle, snapping your fingers in front of his face, mocking him. “Lovie, my eyes are up here.”
“Fuck this,” he tackles you onto your couch, pressing his lips to your exposed skin. 
***
“Okay,” Simon says, putting your ear protectors on. “All good?”
You give him a thumbs up. He presses his front into your back, puppeting you. He aims the gun into your hand at the target. 
“Okay, shoot.” 
The shot echoes off the walls of the shooting range. Your bullet hits the dummy’s shoulder. 
“Nice! ‘Ats not bad, lovie!” Simon smiles wide, kissing your temple. “Again.”
You shoot again. It hits the left pec. Another kiss. 
Another shot. Hits the neck. Another kiss. 
Simon lets you practise for another 10 minutes. He feels proud. Too proud. “Lovie?”
You stop. “Hmm?”
“You’re great. Can we go home now, hmm?” 
“Okay,” you smile, taking off the protectors. “Thanks for teaching me this.”
“After what happened, I’d be a fool not to,” he kisses you. “Yer my whole life.”
He presses himself into you. 
“Now, we’ve got a little problem. Yer solving it in the car. Let’s go. Legs spread.”
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aeyumicore · 2 months
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☾ .⭒˚ she can't come to the phone right now ♡ xavier x afab reader
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⋆.˚ ☾ pairing: xavier x afab!reader (very fem!reader)
☾ .⭒˚ genre: smut, porn with very little plot
⋆.˚ ☾ word count: 3.1k (who is she practicing short smuts)
☾ .⭒˚ content warning: mdni, dom!xavier, dark!xavier, ooc!xavier (unless you consider dark xavier canon), jealous!xav, vaginal sex, prone bone, slight voyeurism, light choking, breeding kink, jealousy, sex while on the phone, hair pulling, squirting, unprotected sex
⋆.˚ ☾ image link: https://x.com/honiraccoon/status/1758152675500380654?s=20 (it's nsfw so i highly rec checking it out bc i can't put it here LOL)
☾ .⭒˚ a/n: HELLO bet you didn’t expect me back so soon! I am back with a SHORT smut this time, based on this amazing ovulating inducing fanart @/honiraccoon on twit/x made (with their permission of course). I’ve attached the photo below :’) go support them and their art!
this is very dom and ‘dark’ (if you’ve seen the glitches) xavier. the smut itself is not that dark!! if you’re not a fan of this version of xavier you will not enjoy this.
also header is from @/osk_purinnumee twitter &lt;3
⋆.˚ ☾ 18+ only ☾ .⭒˚ minors dni ⋆.˚ ☾ 18+ only ☾ .⭒˚ minors dni ⋆.˚ ☾ 18+ only ☾ .⭒˚
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honestly, you had absolutely no idea how you ended up in this position. after not seeing xavier for several days, having been sent on different missions this week, he and you finally had a coinciding day off. and so you’d spent the most perfect day together, complete with morning cuddles after sleeping in, a homemade breakfast, and a fruitful day at the arcade.
you couldn't stop thinking about the signature xavier smile you’d gotten to see all day, soft and pure, just like xavier himself. but this was not the gentle and adoring xavier you’d seen all day, the xavier you’d come to know and love. 
you found yourself naked, with your stomach pressed firmly into xavier’s plush mattress and your feet planted on the ground at the feet of the bed, back arched so deeply it might snap. he was pressed so deeply and harshly on top of you, his feet planted right behind yours. he’d pulled so many orgasms out of you already and showed no signs of relenting, his pelvis smacking your ass repeatedly as he forced himself in and out of you.
“x-xavier, i c-can’t come anymore, please,” your voice was hoarse from screaming, unable to keep up with xavier’s insatiable vigor. you had no idea what had gotten into him today. it’d been a relatively stress-free day, but he seemed to be using your bodies to relieve some kind of intense emotion built up inside of him.
“yes you can, i know you can,” he cooed, his mouth right into your ear as his body crushed you against the bed, “you’re a good girl aren’t you?”
his hands gently grabbed a fist full of your hair, urging you up so your cheeks pressed against each other. you cried out at the sensation, “y-yes, i’m a good girl.”
the wet sounds of his cock ramming in and out of your abused cunt filled the room. xavier’s grip was tight on your scalp and on your waist, and you were sure you’d have bruises in the shape of his fingers the next day.
“you’re my good girl, right?” he groaned out as he removed the hand from your waist to lift you by hooking his arm around your stomach, so that your ass arched higher into the air. at this angle his thick length entered you so deeply that it felt like he might burst through your cervix. your eyes squeezed shut as your tongue slipped out, panting against the brute force of his thrusts. though his tone was dominating and demanding, you couldn’t help but notice a sliver of insecurity lacing his words. 
he tugged at your hair, and you yelped at the slight pain bleeding into the pleasure xavier was giving you. he repeated, this time more demanding and threatening, “whose good girl are you?”
your eyes snapped open as his thrusts pushed through every corner of your poor pussy, ravaging every single inch of you. you forced your brain to focus on his words, his rare domineering attitude driving you absolutely insane, “yours xavier! m’your good girl.”
you felt him harden even further at your words. his voice against your ear is deceptively gentle, “really? then why was my good girl so preoccupied with her phone today?” his words are so domineering and possessive, you find yourself clenching at the thought of his adorable jealousy.
so that's how you found yourself in this position. 
“h-hah, m’sorry xav. jeremiah kept – ah – texting me today to—”
xavier cuts you off, his thrusts stuttering briefly, “jeremiah? he was the one you were – hah – texting all fucking day?”
“y-yes but he was just sending me, ahhh, stupid ph-photos of different animals with kn-knives,” you sputter out, nails digging into the fitted sheet of his mattress. you almost wanted to laugh at how comical it all sounded but the feeling of him inside of you rendered you a speechless mess of sweat, cum, and ecstasy. 
“is that so?” and with that, xavier fucks you with an unprecedented pace. he thrusts so hard your ass ripples against his pelvis and your thighs struggle to stay upright as he presses further into your aching body. you can feel yourself slowly succumbing to the exhaustion of four orgasms, a fifth in the distant horizon.
“you are mine,” he all but growls into your neck, his fingers digging into the delicate skin of your throat. you're jolted back to consciousness at the feeling of his hand closing into your airway, deliciously cutting off your breath. xavier’s rarely this aggressive and brutal. sure he’d love to take the lead as often as he surrendered it to you, but this was a whole different xavier. and you were positively obsessed.
“i’m the only one who gets to see you like this,” he demands against the shell of your ear, using his canines to graze your earlobes. you shiver at his words, cunt clamping down onto him. he moans in response to your grip, but only driving deeper and harder. 
his hard abdomen continued to mold perfectly into your arched back, bending your body into mind numbing proportions. he releases your waist, causing you to slump back into the bed. instead wraps his arm around both your breasts, squeezing to the point of seeing black spots in your vision. 
the force of his thrusts causes your body to rock onto the bed under his large and imposing stature. every single push made your clit brush against the soft bed sheets, stimulating you beyond belief. you were sure xavier’s sheets were absolutely filthy from the spend of your multiple orgasms, smearing all over them as he pushed your body to its limits. 
as you continue to moan uncontrollably for him, xavier refuses to stop whispering filthy praises into your ear, driving you closer and closer. 
“you’re so beautiful like this, your body was made just for me, right?” 
you nod feverishly, his words going straight to your cunt. it wasn’t often you got to witness this side of xavier and you were living for it. 
“m’all yours xav, no one else’s ever,” you choke out, the force of his cock deep in your throat.
his head dips down, pressing wet kisses into your shoulder blades before biting down and sucking brutally hard, and then licking at them soothingly. xavier smiles, admiring the hickies forming on your trembling soft skin, marking you as his. 
“if only jeremiah could see you like this. maybe he would realize you’re mine, huh?” 
you wanted to retort, reassure him that he had absolutely nothing to be concerned about, but your brain could only focus on his massive cock claiming every part of your throbbing cunt. he’d rendered you absolutely fucked out, a vessel of ecstasy and a means to pleasure himself. your brain fought to form words, to no avail. only the most primal parts of you remained, capable of moaning and screaming for him and nothing more. 
you try to speak again, but before you can get anything out the sound of your phone on the bed beside your slick bodies rang out. the screen lit up and through your fucked out haze and tears in your eyes, you could vaguely make out jeremiah’s contact photo lighting up the screen.
“speak of the devil,” xavier grits out. despite the annoyance in his voice you can also make out the faintest hint of mischief. 
“pick it up love,” he whispers almost tauntingly, thrusts still unrelenting, “we can’t ignore our poor jeremiah can we?” 
while you can tell his words are laced with jealousy and faint bitterness, you know xavier cares about jeremiah and trusts him fully. it really felt like he was just, for once,  giving into his primal urges, and enjoying the hell out of it too.
you shook your head no, doing your best to push your phone away.
“no?” xavier asks, amused, “but i thought it was urgent that you respond to him immediately.” 
you want to roll your eyes at his childishness, but before you can do anything, xavier snatches the phone from beside you, slowing his rhythm to a languid roll of his pelvis against your flushed ass.
“x-xavier—“ but he cuts you off with a pointed thrust that knocks the wind out of you, his thick length absolutely rearranging your guts. you whine at the blinding pleasure, almost forgetting the fact that xavier was picking up your cell phone, while he was inside of you. 
“hello?” xavier answers cooly, as if he wasn’t knee deep into your cunt. he holds the phone to his ear, laying down into the arch of your back. his cheek is pressed against yours, his hot breath blowing into your burning skin while he speaks, as he continues to ravage you. 
your eyes widen as you realize he didn’t just decline the call, and that he was actually on the phone. but xavier reads you like the back of his hand, covering your mouth with his palm before you can protest. he grips your face gently, but not allowing a single word to come out beyond the muffled sounds of your sensual moans. 
“oh, hey jeremiah. y/n forgot her phone and is currently occupied by me right now,” xavier speaks calmly, but the increased passion in his thrusts send your eyes reeling into the back of his skull. his words hold a suspicious double meaning, and you pray jeremiah doesn’t catch on. similarly, you desperately hope that the loud wet sounds of his pelvis pounding into you can’t be heard on the phone, cause they ring so loudly in your ear.
every time you try to speak, xavier’s grip on your face gets tighter and his pace gets rougher, harder. it’s like he’s trying to force the lewd moans out of your mouth, like he wanted jeremiah to hear everything he was doing to you, to hear the sound of his skin slapping into yours. strangely enough, the risk of it all intensifies the pleasure ten-fold. you tighten around xavier as you continue to leak everywhere.
xavier swears inexplicably under his breath, though you’re sure jeremiah can still hear it, “squeezing me so fucking tight.” your eyes squeeze shut at the excitement and embarrassment of xavier’s inability to contain his own pleasure. or perhaps, he didn’t contain it on purpose.
as if to punish you, xavier gives you a deliberate and pointed thrust, letting his cock angle upwards into your g spot while his body pushes you down so your clit drags against the bed, forcing the most vulgar sob out of your lips, bordering between a strangled cry and a mewling whimper. simultaneously, his hold on your chin loosens and he slips his index and middle finger into your waiting mouth. his actions cause your previously muffled moans to ring out completely unrestricted.
your eyes widen as you realize there is absolutely no way jeremiah didn’t hear that. it seems like you’re correct because xavier’s soft voice pierces through the thick sexual tension in the air.
“no. that’s the sound of a kitten,” you can hear the grin in his voice as he continues to roll his hips into you, his fingers toying with your tongue. you vaguely hear jeremiah’s muffled voice through the phone, doing your best to keep your sounds at bay. and failing miserably. 
“okay, bye.” xavier tosses your phone back on the bed, kneeling back into your body and into your neck.
“do you think he bought that?” xavier’s grinning again, and you are certain he’s teasing you. 
“xavier!” you cry, the mortification settling in with the pleasure, both feelings fighting to dominate your consciousness. 
“i told you, you’re mine. jeremiah needs to know that,” he grumbles breathlessly into your ear, nibbling on your earlobe. 
“m’yours xav, everyone knows that,” you cry out. xavier moans out in satisfaction, and you feel his cock twitching inside of your gummy walls. his pace grows erratic as his length swells inside of you, and you can tell he’s so close to coming undone. 
his husky groans by your ear fuel the fire of your own orgasm, stoking the burning embers until they threaten to burst into a full blown wildfire.
“sh-shit you’re close huh love? getting so damn tight around me,” xavier grunts, biting into your neck. suddenly he picks your phone back up and you can distinctly see the flash shining down on the bed below your bodies. 
“x-xavier?” you moan, completely blissed out, unable to turn your head to see what he’s doing. he lifts his body off of yours and grips your waist with one hand, pushing you down harder on his erection.
“don’t worry baby, just taking some videos for our dear friend,” he mutters and you hear the distinct beep of your phone starting a recording. you try to protest but xavier’s pace becomes unrelenting and you’re only able to moan out his name once more.
“you gonna come for me, my love?” his voice is far away, clouded with intense lust. his grip on your waist tightens as he watches the ripples of your flesh against his viscous pounding. your back arches at his words, cunt tightening in anticipation of your climax.
“m’so close xav, gonna cum s-soon,” you wail, letting your body tighten around him, wanting him to cum with you. 
his hand leaves your waist and presses against the bulge on your tummy, “can you feel that love? i’m right here. should i put a baby in here? think it’ll fit?”
you squeal at his words, the pure filth dripping off of them like gasoline to the wildfire that is your impending orgasm, raging through every inch of your body. your pussy squeezes around him again.
“ffuuck, i think that’s a yes, huh baby? want me to cum inside you?” he’s panting desperately as he fills you repeatedly, “fuck – you would look so beautiful with my baby –  hah –  inside of you.”
in your fucked out state, you nod excitedly, wanting nothing more than to be filled to the brim with his essence, everywhere. you could worry about the repercussions after.
“then everyone will know you’re mine huh? right baby?” you nod again, your voice nothing more than a strangled moan. 
“say it for the camera love, let him know,” he encourages, his voice deep and throaty. he doesn’t say who, but you know exactly who xavier is referencing.
though you don’t want to indulge his jealousy, you find yourself unable to deny the man who was guts deep in your womb. and so you cry out, “m’all yours xav, please. need you t’cum inside. i’m a g-good girl, i deserve your cum, please.”
your phone shakes in xavier’s hands as your words set him off, “fuck, don’t worry baby, s’all for you. gonna give it all to you ’kay? you ready love?”
you tighten in response, signaling that you’re about to fall into the chasm of your orgasm. 
“x-xavier m’cumming,” you wail, gripping onto the sheets for dear life, your ass grinding deeper into him, back arching into the bed. your body trembles as the climax overtakes you. your vision spots as the sensitivity of multiple orgasms wrecks your body. the pressure in your guts is so intense, threatening to explode, and you feel yourself release all over xavier’s groin. the sensation was so new and foreign it had your brain reeling, trying to grasp onto this new ecstasy your body was falling into. 
“h-holy shit did you just squirt on me?” xavier groans out, still recording the sight of your ass against him. and he thanked god he was recording at all, able to capture the sight of you squirting all over him. 
“i-i think so xav, m’sorry,” you cry, still quivering around his brutal thrusts. the soaked friction of the wet skin between you two splashes and your cheek burns in embarrassment. you’d never squirt before, and you were mortified. 
“no,” he grits breathlessly, almost threateningly, “don’t be sorry. fuck, need to see you do that for me again.” you hear the click of the recording shutting off, and your phone bounces back onto the mattress. xavier grabs your waist with both hands and thrusts sloppily, cock spasming in your tight walls. 
he groans through every last thrust, and you cling onto consciousness, riding the last waves of your orgasm. xavier falls back in place on top of you, wanting to be as physically close to you as possible when he finished. his abdomen pressed into the arch of your back and his chin dug into the crook of your neck. with one final savage stroke, he spills everything he has into you.
xavier shivers through his orgasm, rope after rope of milky white essence dripping into you. you can feel every pump of his warmth inside you. he thrusts languidly a few more times for good measure, wanting it to reach as physically deep as possible. he’d be damned if he let a single drop go to waste.
your legs give out and you rest yourself entirely on the bed while xavier rests on top of you, supporting most of his weight with his arms propped on the bed, still caging you in. he presses a gentle kiss to your shoulder, then your neck, and then your cheek.
“you’re going to make such a good mommy one day,” xavier murmurs into your ear, rubbing slow and soothing circles into your ribcage. 
your heart squeezes at his words, and simultaneously your cunt around his softening cock. xavier hisses at the overstimulation, “fuck you’re going to squeeze every last drop out of me love. you like the idea of being a mommy huh?”
you nod sleepily, losing your grip on consciousness, “mm, slipping out xavier.”
xavier pulls out of you with a groan, and you whimper at the feel of the release dripping down your thighs. he picks you up gently so your legs no longer hang off the bed and then flops down beside you, tucking you into his chest.
you sigh contently against his softly heaving heart. you feel xavier moving around, while still keeping his arm wrapped around you. you force your eyes open so you can see what he’s up to, and find him unlocking your phone, the light illuminating his face in the darkening room. 
“xav? what are you doing?” you mumble sleepily, nestling back into his warm body. 
“just sending some videos,” xavier whispers, stroking your hair with his free hand. 
your eyes fly open and you sit up to face him, “xavier! absolutely not!”
he grins mischievously at you, “relax love, i just sent them to myself.” the reassuring smile he gives you reminds you your soft, adoring, and gentle xavier is back. but you can’t help but anticipate the next time you’ll see that side of xavier again.
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bonus: some of the pics that jeremiah was texting mc:
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© aeyumicore 2024. please do not steal ♡
taglist: @queenashen @kttriangle @lyssa-211 @jeikeun
3K notes · View notes
forever-rogue · 1 year
Note
I have a Joel request 🥰 Maybe reader was pregnant when the beginning of the pandemic happened and they got separated until years later when they reunite and their kid is older?? Whether or not joel knows about the pregnancy is up to you 🫠
Fluffy and angsty if you wish, but please not too angsty cause my heart is still healing from that angst fic 😅💔
(I see someone has already brought up a similar idea, but I thought I'd request for your take on the story cause I can never get enough of your writing!!!)
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AN | Don’t worry babe, I’ve got you! But really I love this concept!
Pairing | Joel Miller x Fem!Reader
Warnings | Language
Word Count | 2.7k
Masterlist | Joel, Main
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
"Joel?" your voice shook, and it was so painfully obvious that you were trying not to cry. Then again, a lot of people had been doing a lot of crying lately. You couldn't blame them; the world had basically ended.
And now it felt like yours was ending all over again. Fuck.
You padded into the living room of the apartment that now served as home for god knows how long. You found him sitting on the couch and staring out the window. He wasn't paying attention to what was going on out there, which happened to be very bleak at the moment. 
"Joel?" you called his name again, moving closer and hesitantly putting your hand on his shoulder. He startled easily lately; you didn't want to be the cause of it. He finally snapped back into attention and looked at you, all dark circles and empty eyes. It broke your heart, "I-I have something to tell you."
He remained quiet but looked raised an eyebrow in acknowledgement. You opened and closed your mouth a few times, suddenly at a loss for words.
How were you supposed to tell him that you were pregnant?
The world had come apart at the seams and he'd just lost his daughter. This was absolutely the worst in the world for all of this to happen.
You waved your hands for a moment, wishing the ground would open up and swallow you whole, "I-I'm-"
Before you could go any further, a loud knocking came at the door. Both of you startled as Joel jumped up and walked over to the door, opening it hurriedly, "what?"
"New horde of infected," a man's gruff voice reached your ears, "FEDRA wants everyone to pack up and go now."
"How far away?"
"Less than a mile."
You did not like the sound of that. A lump welled up in your throat as you looked at Joel helplessly. His face hardened into an unreadable expression before he gave the man, you were pretty sure his name was Nick, a hard nod, “we’ll be ready to go.”
“Good,” he was already moving along to the couple next door, “now go, there’s no time to lose.”
Joel slammed the door shut before letting out a long sigh. He was tired, so, so tired, but he couldn’t just give up. He had to keep going, he had to keep pushing. 
“Joel?”
“Pack a bag, whatever you want grab,” he motioned towards the bedroom, “it doesn’t really matter anymore, but get what you need.”
“What’s going to happen?” your mind was reeling with worry; about you, him, the baby, and whatever the hell was about to go down, “I-I’m scared.”
“I know baby,” he set his large hands on your shoulders, “but right now you can’t worry about that. Just focus on getting your stuff and leaving. Ten minutes, okay? Then we have to get over to the FEDRA station and leave. Yes?”
“Yes,” you agreed shakily, already padding back to your bedroom to get the few possessions you had felt in the world.
Joel nodded as he went to grab his stuff, knives and guns and other weapons, agreeing to meet at the door shortly.
Time seemed to move in a combination of incredibly fast and wickedly slow and before you knew it, Joel was calling for you to leave. You met him at the door the two of you looked at each other in silent understanding.
The trek over to the FEDRA outpost wasn’t far and the other people in the small community were already in a panic to get out, all scrambling around each other. You grew nervous, wondering if you’d be able to get out in time. 
Joel’s hand was on the small of your back as he led you closer to the vehicles designated for exactly this purpose. 
The rest of it all happened so fast. The first group of infected had come around and were making their way into what you had once believed to be a safe space. Chaos ensued as some people tried to get out as quickly as possible and others hung back to try and fight. 
“Go,” Joel shielded you as he walked you over to the one of the vehicles. You were trying to get him inside with you, holding onto his hand tightly and pulled him. 
“Joel-”
“Go,” he insisted firmly and for a moment, time stood still as he kissed you, “go. Get out to safety, okay?”
“What about you?” you hadn’t realized you’d started crying; you hated that he had to be such a good man, “please, come with me now. Please-”
“I’ll find you,” it was a promise both of you knew he might not be able to keep, “I swear it. I’ll find you.”
“Joel-”
“I love you,” he took a step back as the vehicle started up and a few stragglers tried to get on, “I’ll find you soon.”
“I love you,” you cried, “please. Please.”
You weren’t even sure what you were asking for. Everything felt so surreal and left you in a daze; the next thing you knew, he was gone. 
You were leaving to get to the next safe space and he was just gone. 
You’d never felt more numb. 
But you never let go of the hope that one day he’d find you.
Joel Miller was a good man.
A good man that kept his promises.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
"Luca!" you sighed softly as you tried to find your son. You loved him dearly, but sometimes he just stressed out. He was just a kid though, and you couldn't be mad at him for that. 
He also happened to be extremely friendly and sociable, which made him popular among everyone. You walked down the street to one of his little friend's houses, sure they were just playing.
It was almost too quiet when you got there, and you were sure that they'd gone off somewhere else. You knocked on the door nonetheless and Lisa opened it, smiling when she saw it was you, "hey darlin', I'm afraid they're not here if you're looking for the little bundle of chaos they are."
"I had a feeling," crossing your arms over your chest you rolled your eyes playfully, "it's way too quiet and calm here."
"It's a nice change of pace if I do say so," she winked at you and the two of you exchanged smiles that only a single mother would understand, "do you want to come in for a bit?"
"Rain check?" You asked sheepishly, "I was going to go friend the kiddos….realistically I know they're fine but I'd rather see it with my own eyes."
"Definitely," she gave your shoulder a squeeze, "see you around."
It was a beautiful spring day, warm and breezy with small creatures scurrying about; it always felt like life was back to normal. Or what you had once known as normal…but this had been your reality for almost seven years now. Maybe this was your normal now. 
Nonetheless you decided to remain positive and decided instead to head down to the pond where the kids liked to play. Spring had brought around a bunch of ducklings and you were sure that the kids would be mesmerized by them. But, to be quite honest, so were you. The magic of such simple things was not lost on you. Now, more than ever, these sorts of things were so important. 
“Luca?” you saw a bunch of small figures around and screaming, and you finally relaxed. As you came into view, the boy grinned at you a big smile on his face, his curls roguish from the wind, “hey babe. You doin’ okay?”
“I’m okay,” he confirmed, his brown eyes sparkling as you ruffled his hair affectionately, “are you okay, mama?”
“Of course,” you crouched down so you were eye level with him, “all better now that I know you’re here. Remember when we talked about letting me know when you go out to play?”
“Yes,” he looked worried for a moment before you shook your head softly, “I’m sorry. I got excited about playing and forgot.”
“It’s okay,” you touched his cheek softly, “I’m not mad. Next time can you please remember to tell me?”
“Okay,” he wrapped his small arms around you, hugging you as best as he could. He was a sweetheart and of all the kids you could have ended up with, you were glad he choose you, “can I go back and play now?”
“Definitely,” tender kisses were pressed to his cheeks as you tickled his sides, “go and be good! I love you, kiddo.”
“I love you too, mama,” and off he was, running back to his friend as you watched him go. 
You slowly stood up before stretching and relishing in the popping of your joints. Having been reassured that he was going to be okay, you decided it was time to go back and start tending to the communal gardens. You never really had a green thumb before, but the last few years had really helped you grow. 
You were wrapped up in your own thoughts and almost didn’t notice the man in the middle of the sidewalk, clearly confused. You’d heard some newcomers might be headed your way, but you hadn’t come across any of them yet. Having new people around was something you’d come to love; it wasn’t common most of the time. 
“Hello there,” you were practically beaming as you bounced over to him. The man turned around at the sound of your voice, “you must be new…”
You stopped dead in your tracks as soon as you met his face, suddenly unsure if this was real life or just a wicked dream. You blinked a few times, trying to clear your vision and figure out if what you were looking at was real. There was no way…absolutely none. 
But he looked just like him, watching you with equally curious eyes. Your heart was beating so fast you were surprised it didn’t burst through your ribcage. Your mouth ran dry but you managed to get one singular, “Joel?”
After a moment of stunned silence he nodded before whispering your name in return. The tears were already welling up and threatening to run down your cheeks. Before you knew it, the man that once was your partner, lover - everything - took you in his arms and crushed you to his chest. You didn’t mind.
He was all too familiar, bringing back a rush of memories and emotions as you buried your face in his chest, breathing in his familiar scent. The two of you held onto each other tightly for some time; you were afraid that if you let him go he would disappear again and you would wake up to find it was all a horrible dream. 
When he pulled back, he took your face in his hands and gently brushed your tears away with his thumb. He drank you in, trying to understand every single thing that had happened since the day you lost each other, “hi.”
“Hi,” you grinned back with a teary smile, “you’re here. Really here.”
“I’m here,” he promised, leaning in to press a kiss to your forehead, “I’m here.”
“Joel, I-”
“Mama!” the small voice of your son reached your ears as he ran over to the two of you, “I found a little duckie and I don’t see the mom duck and it’s so small and can I keep him?”
“Whoa, bud, slow down there for a moment,” he tucked himself behind your legs, suddenly feeling shy when he realized Joel was there. You could see Joel’s eyes flick to the young boy as his brow furrowed in confusion. You put a hand on his shoulder and encouraged him to introduce himself, “can you say hi?”
“Hi,” he sounded so young as he looked at Joel; their eyes mirroring each other, “I’m Luca.”
“Hi Luca,” he held out his hand to shake the young boy’s much smaller one, his mind racing and reeling with questions. But he was a smart man and could put two and two together,  “I’m Joel.”
“My daddy’s name was Joel,” Luca mused as Joel turned his attention back to you, “that’s what mama said anyway. Can I go back to the ducks now?”
“Yeah babe, go ahead. Don’t touch them though and let the mama duck do her thing. I'm sure she'll be back,” he nodded in response before trekking away again, throwing a little wave at the two of you. You nervously turned your attention back to Joel. 
“A son?” he asked, his voice thick with emotion as you nodded softly, “we have a son?”
“Yes,” it felt like a huge weight lifted off your shoulders as you finally got to tell him what you had wanted all those years ago, “we have a son. He looks just like you.”
“I never…I had no clue,” he ran a hand over his face in surprise, “I didn’t even know you were pregnant.”
“I found out that day,” also known as the day. When everything fell apart for a second time and you were separated from each other, “I was trying to tell you, right before Nick had come and knocked at our door. I realized that morning that I was…pregnant. And I never got the chance to tell you…when everything just started happening, it didn’t cross my mind again. And then…I lost you. I thought I’d lost you forever.”
“You had to go through all of that alone,” he looked at you in awe as you shrugged lightly, “you had to go through being pregnant alone and then raised our son alone.”
“I had a lot of help along the way,” you admitted softly, “turns out that times like these are good at bringing out the worst and the best of people. I told him about you; from when he was little. I always wanted him to know what a wonderful man his father was. And now…he got to meet you.”
“All this time,” he could cry thinking about it all. You, alone and scared, being pregnant in a world that was collapsing, and then having to raise a son alone. He’d lost Sarah, a loss that hurt still, and he knew always would, and he’d almost lost his son. But the universe, fate, or whatever was out there had given him a second chance. Not only to find you, but to be you and the son you shared, “baby.”
“It’s okay,” this time the tears running down your cheeks were happy, “it’s okay. You’re here now and that’s all that matters. And now you’ll get the opportunity to know Luca, and it’s…all I ever wanted.”
“We have a son,” he repeated as though he was in a daze, a happy blissful daze.
“You don’t have to…if you don’t want to spend time with him or anything I-I understand,” it would kill you, but you’d understand, “I don’t want you to feel obligated just because. O-or if there’s someone else.”
“No,” he shook his head fervently, “there’s never been anyway else. How could there ever be? It was always you for me; you’re still it.”
“Yeah,” you exhaled with a small laugh, relieved to hear his answer, “it’s always been you for me too.”
“I was just planning on passing through,” he touched your face, thumb gently brushing over your cheek, “but if it’s okay with you, I could stay a while.”
“How about forever?” you asked softly, “i-if you want to. I-I mean we can figure it out, but-”
“Forever sounds perfect.”
“Yeah?”
“Yes.”
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imyourbratzdoll · 4 months
Note
I have a request you are up for it. I kind of had this idea where Steve Rogers really screwed the Reader over in their past relationship and cheated on her with Sharon and dumped the reader for her. Even the avengers don't talk to her anymore and made her look like the toxic one in the relationship. two years later it's his and Sharon's wedding day and it was a beautiful and wonderful, however reader returns and decides to kill seek her revenge on Steve and Sharon and the rest of the team. Let's just say she gets it and Steve suffers. (Reader is a witch by the way)😈
hello honey, I hope you like what I've done.
summary - steve cheats on you, causing the team to turn against you to save the world from hating him. years later, you finally seek your revenge.
warning - angst, torture, cheating, dark content, badass female
the gif I use isn't mine, divider by @newlips (deactivated)
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It had been two years since Steve Rogers broke your heart, you thought that would be the worst of it, but the fact the team turned on you and screwed you over by making it seem like you cheated on Captain America, causing the world to hate you, treating you like shit until the point you snapped. If they wanted a bad guy, they’ll get one. 
You sat in a dark room as the tv played, your ex was getting married to the tramp he cheated on you with. Your golden eyes sharpen as you glare at the screen, causing it to explode in sparks. You grin, the whole team would be in that church, making this so much easier for you. 
Your hands glow as you begin to hover, your long black dress falling gracefully around your legs. “Oh, the day that the Avengers fall and all by my hands.” Your laugh echoes throughout the room and you disappear, reappearing in front of the god-awful building. “Oh god, could their taste be any worse?” Your hands face down, levitating toward the church doors and flinging them open with your magic. The whole room falls quiet. “Well, well. Where was my invitation?” 
Your head tilts as Sharon huffs. “You aren’t welcome here!” Your eyes move around the room, connecting with each person. “Hello? Get the fuck out! Didn’t you realise you weren’t welcomed when Steve left you for me?!” 
You smile, your gaze moves back over to hers and you stare. Watching as she shivers under it. “Sharon, Sharon, Sharon. You should know not to mess with a witch, especially a pissed off one.” Your hand flies up, stopping a bullet midair, you slowly tilt your head, looking at the small metal object before your gaze follows where it came from. A grin forms on your face as you connect with Natasha’s. It appears you found something that made the big Black Widow shudder with fear. 
“Y/n, stop this. You are only hurting yourself.” You blink, once, twice, thrice before your laughter fills the room, sending chills up everyone’s spines. “Why are you laughing?! Do you not realise how insane you look right now?!” 
“Sweet, sweet Natasha.” The bullet melts as you direct your hand toward her, lifting her in the air, watching her dangle as she struggles. “I’m not hurting myself, I’ve finally healed from the pain you all put me through. Because, sure I loved Steve and it felt like my heart had been ripped out when he constantly cheated on me with some wannabe tramp. But I could’ve lived through that, what I wasn’t expecting was the heartbreak from the people I considered family.” A growl rumbles within your throat, eyes glowing brighter with each word and emotion. “I can no longer hurt myself when you did a wonderful job of it for me.” You twitch, you can feel the stupid witch trying to enter your mind, her magic feels like something irritating, like a jumper that continues to itch because someone made it out of that horrible fabric.
You continue your hold on Natasha, turning your head, gold meets red. “What are you doing, Little Witch?” You blink, sending her flying across the room, crashing into a row of ugly flowers, causing you to scrunch your nose. “Ew, who chooses weeds for their special day?” You huff, feeling a body slam into you and your other hand reaches out, strangling Vision as he tries to charge again. “What is with you people, don’t you know it’s rude to just attack a person.”
“Y/n stop. That’s enough.” Two years ago, your heart would’ve pounded inside your chest from hearing his voice. But now, your heart lies cold within your body. The rest of the team that you don’t have a hold on, stand, readying for a fight. It felt comedic. “If you don’t leave, we will make you leave.” 
You throw your head back, letting out another chilling laugh before your head falls forward and you glare at your ex. “You make me leave? Do you think you’re stronger than me? You may be Captain America, but deep down you’re just that weak little boy back in the 40s.” You float over to him, black and gold magic building beneath you in a cloud and the anger builds in your veins. Your hands fly back, throwing those you had in your hold against the church walls before you reach in front, releasing all your magic onto the one man, watching him fall to his knees. “You and your team are no match for me, Steve Rogers. You will never be, you will all fall before you even manage to take me with you.” You lower to the ground, standing over him, leaning over, moving your face close enough that it looks as though you are about to kiss. “You will beg me for your life. It may not be today or a year from now, but you will.” You grip his chin between your fingers, forcing him to look into your eyes as you smile. 
Your eyes flash, stopping Tony from approaching, his Iron Man suit begins to slowly enclose on him, squashing him from the inside. “Not so fast, Mr Stark.” Your magic wraps around Steve’s body, keeping him in his position as you turn and face the rest of the Avengers. You look at each and everyone of them, letting your magic explode around you and the room, wrapping around them. “Soon you will all fall, no longer loved, no longer remembered. The world will move on without you and in your demise, you will beg me for help, falling deeper and onto your knees. Sacrificing your beliefs and pride.” You begin to descend from the steps, smirking. “Hm, why don’t I continue to torture you guys some more.” 
With a wave of your hand, all their nightmares come to life. Every single person or thing that they don’t want to face appear in front of them, torturing them, allowing you to sit back and watch with a smile, a glass of wine appears in your hand as you watch them all suffer. A few hours pass and you grow bored, making everything disappear along with yourself. 
While your magic circulated around them, it allowed you to see their future and it gave you many ideas to how you could continue to ruin their lives. Starting with the man who destroyed you. You close your eyes, feeling your spirit escape you and travel back in time, appearing in front of a woman that many looked up to. 
“Peggy Carter.” She spins, looking around for the voice. Your eyes glow and your magic surrounds her. “The love you feel for Steve Rogers will turn into hate, he will appear soon and will want to stay. You will fill his head with every hurtful thing you’ve thought of. You will see who he really is and how much he has changed when he was the smaller version of himself. You will destroy him, rip out his heart and squash it in front of his eyes. He will finally know how it is to feel his heart being broken.” She blinks, walking over to the photo of Steve, staring at it, and wondering why she has it before Peggy grabs the photo and drops it into the bin. 
You smirk, disappearing back into your time and body. Your eyes open with an evil glint, staring right at the readers.
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thank you for reading!
feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated.
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hazbinwhoree · 2 months
Note
Adam x f!reader
after a one night stand with Adam, around a month or two later she reveals she’s pregnant with his kid..
his reaction and maybe his life when the baby arrives him failing at changing a diaper
him falling asleep on the couch watching tv with his baby on his chest with a tiny spot of drool on his shirt 🥹
bonus
Lute holding the child and then the baby pukes on her
Father Adam
Adam and (Name) had been friends for a long time. Just friends. Until one drunken night, they can’t pretend anymore, and they hookup. The one night stand shakes their friendship, and they don’t talk nearly as much over the next two months.
That’s why Adam is so surprised when he opens his door to find (Name) in tears.
“(Name), what’s wrong?” “Can I come in? You should maybe sit down for this.”
Adam has absolutely no idea what (Name) is about to throw at him, letting her in and sitting next to her on his couch. (Name) pulls something out of her pocket and hands it to Adam. Adam felt the world stop. It was a pregnancy test. A positive pregnancy test.
He’s silent for a long minute before shakily asking, “You’re sure it’s mine?”
(Name) hits his arm. “Yes, I’m sure, you’re the only guy I’ve fucked in like a year.”
Adam is silent again, before snapping out of his daze and taking (Name)’s hands into his. “I… I love you.” The tension that had been between them since the one night stand was finally put into words.
Tears poured down her face as she threw her arms around Adam’s neck. Adam pulled her into his lap and (Name) buries her face in his neck. “I love you too.”
The nine months flew by, Adam and (Name) learning to live as a couple before they had to learn how to live as parents.
Luckily, years of friendship made it easy, and their relationship had very few bumps.
Adam was fast asleep when he was abruptly awoken by (Name) shaking him, telling him when he woke in a small, scared voice, “My water broke and I’m having contractions.”
19 hours later, their son was born. Adam, the egotistical bitch he is, insisted on naming their son Adam as well. (Name) allowed it, and they celebrated the arrival of Adam Jr.
They took him home a day later, and Adam basically went through the five stages of grief. He loves his kid and he’s proud to be a father of a child he actually wanted, but he realizes he has no idea how to be a dad, and is now worried he’s going to fuck up his son.
(Name) assures him he won’t fuck up their child and Adam finds himself believing her.
The first night, Adam sleeps straight through the baby crying. The second night, the same thing happened. The third night, (Name) shook him awake and grumbled “Your turn.”
Adam drowsily made his way to the nursery, and crying baby at three in the morning was now his least favorite thing. He sighed, picking his son up out of his crib and carrying him with him to the kitchen.
He bounced and shushed baby Adam while he prepared a bottle of milk. Thank god it was simple enough, all he had to do was heat it up. When he was done and bringing the bottle to his son’s lips, he immediately stopped crying and Adam sighed in relief.
Adam never woke up from the baby crying, he slept like a rock, but (Name) would wake him up and they took turns with the night feedings.
Once Adam half woke up to see (Name) breastfeeding their son in bed next to him. “Me next,” he murmured, before promptly passing back out.
The one thing Adam couldn’t seem to get a handle on was changing diapers. His son had peed on him twice. And something about baby poop smelled especially bad, and he gagged everytime he had to change a poop diaper.
He was such a baby about it that (Name) did most of the diaper changes.
Three months in, and (Name) had two favorite memories.
The first one was when she’d come home from the store to find Adam asleep on the couch, baby Adam asleep on his chest. Despite being knocked out, Adam still had a secure grip on the baby. They were both drooling. Like father like son.
The second was when Lute was holding baby Adam and finally getting comfortable holding a baby when he suddenly threw up on her shirt.
Adam thought it was hilarious. Lute did not.
Adam isn’t the world’s greatest dad by any means, but he’s trying his best.
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taeyeonschild · 9 months
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《sleeping apart, after a fight || maknae line ver.》
—————————————————
pairing: maknae line (separate) x gn!reader
genre: i dunno, you tell me. (fluff? angst?? SMUT??!?? no it’s not smut dw😌)
contains: exactly as it says in the title
warnings: !!!uncomfortable couch!!!
A/N: idk what i’m doing, any more than you do. why did i choose to write this? i have no clue 🤷‍♀️
on a completely unrelated note: here’s a song i’m obsessed with right now
hyung line | maknae line
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Han
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He watches as you grab your pillow and blanket from the bed, then angrily stomp into the living room.
When he hears the door slam, he sinks to the ground in a sigh.
He sits there, in silence for a few minutes, just to calm himself down, before anxiously tiptoeing into the living room, and approaching you.
“How about, I take the couch, and you go take the bed? I know your mad at me, and I feel bad, but I’d feel way worse if you wake up tomorrow with a sore back from this couch.”
You silently agree, while getting up from the couch to hand him the pillow and blanket.
“We’ll talk tomorrow morning?”
You reply with only a nod, too tired and overwhelmed to do much else.
The bed is a lot more comfortable than the couch, it’s a good thing you have a boyfriend who cares enough to make that trade for you.
An hour later, Jisung is still lying on the couch, staring up at the ceiling. It's not comfortable at all, and he can feel every spring poking into his back. He rolls around, doing anything he can to try to get comfortable, but it is no use.
“Gah!”
He groans quietly to himself, and he eventually picks himself up off of the couch and walks to the bedroom.
A strong arm wraps around your waist. Still angry, but you don’t fight it.
“The couch is uncomfortable. I’d rather be here with you. I love you”
In the morning the fight is forgotten, and all is well in quokkaville.
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Felix
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He can’t sleep without you.
He’ll lay alone in the guest bedroom for an hour or two, scared to anger you more.
At 3am he finally sneaks into the bed beside you.
(If you’re asleep, he will quietly climb under the covers, and wrap you in his arms, very careful not to wake you up.)
If you are awake he just sits there, looking at you.
His hand gently rubs up an down your shoulder.
You are stubborn, and refuse to face him.
“Y/n i’m sorry… okay?”
“I forgot our date I know, I’ve just been so caught up with work… and I know that’s not an excuse, it’s my fault for forgetting. but I promise it won’t happen again, my love. I’m so sorry”
He practically begs you to forgive him
“Please darling… forgive me. I love you, and I can’t stand you being angry at me. I’ll do anything to make it up to you. I’ll take you out tomorrow, and the day after, and every day after that. I’ll never forget a date again. I’ll even take friday off of work, and we can spend the whole day together!”
He rambles on and on, just trying to convince you to look at him.
But he stop’s suddenly when he sees your shoulder shake slightly, and he hears a sniffle.
“Oh god, oh no. Are you crying? Y/n I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to!”
He holds your waist tightly and kisses your neck, doing anything he can to comfort you.
“i just feel like, i’m not a priority anymore. we haven’t gone out in a month.” you speak through sniffles, and choked sobs.
“No no no! Y/n you are always my number one! I’ve just been really busy with this new comeback, i haven’t had much time to think about really anything else. But i’m sorry, truly. I never want you to feel unloved. You are, and will always be, the most important thing to me, my love.”
He hugs you, and rocks you slowly off to sleep. All is well, all is forgiven, all there is, is love, between you.
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Seungmin
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“I’m done!! I’m sleeping in the guest room. We’ll finish this tomorrow!” you finally snap, then storm out of the living room.
Stubborn x equally as stubborn, is your relationship trope. You both know that this fight won’t end, until one of you puts your pride aside, to start the apologies.
Tonight, you refuse to be that person.
The guest bedroom is cold and lonely, you spend the whole night wondering how Seungmin is doing… He’s probably having a fantastic time in the big bed all to himself…
Your prediction couldn’t be any less correct.
Seungmin is eating himself up inside with guilt, he can’t sleep any more than you can.
Part of him is glad that you aren’t in the same room, since he always wants to appear strong infront of you. He would never want you to find him weak and crying like he is now..
The night is long, and uncomfortable, and cold, and neither of you can sleep.
After an hour or so, of suffering, Seungmin gives into the pain, and knocks on the guest bedroom door.
Angrily, you ignore him, but he enters anyways.
You look like a mess, your hair is a rats nest from hoe much you’ve tossed and turned, your face is all red and puffy from crying.
Without speaking, he crawls into the bed beside you, wrapping his arms around your torso.
He gives you no space to refuse, but it’s not like you’d want to anyways…
“Let’s just stop fighting. I love you. Goodnight y/nnie”
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Jeongin
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“I’m sleeping on the couch tonight”
His disappointed, quiet tone, hurts you even more that it would’ve if he had yelled it.
Before you have any time to rebut, he leaves the bedroom, closing the door behind him.
“Jeongin!!” he ignores your call.
He sets up the couch to the best of his ability, but it is anything but comfortable.
He lays in silence staring at the ceiling for what feels like an eternity, till he hears your footsteps echo down the hall.
Your sniffles break him, but he wants to remain strong. He knows that looking at you will break him, so he pretends to be asleep.
You kneel beside him, on the floor, and gently stroke his arm.
“Innie?”
He doesn’t reply initially, keeping his eyes closed to stay in character. But hearing your sniffles breaks him.
“Yeah?”
“Please come to bed. We don’t have to talk, we can stay on opposite sides of the bed. I just need you with me.” you beg.
Hearing this hurts him. He tries his hardest to avoid eye contact, knowing that he will instantly forgive you, if he even so much as looks at your face.
“Okay, i’ll come. I just need some time. We’ll talk tomorrow, alright?”
He then gets off of the couch, slowly walking to the bedroom. He climbs into his side of the bed, and you follow after.
You lay, facing away from eachother. Both wide awake, and unable to sleep.
There’s no way to prevent the tears that fall from your eyes, and you begin to choke back sobs. You try your best to stay quiet, to allow Jeongin peace and quiet. But of course, he can hear you.
As much as he wants to pretend he’s asleep, he feels bad seeing you like this. It’s clear that the guilt is eating you up inside, and it’s making him feel even worse.
Carefully, he wraps his arm around your waist, and you can feel his breath on your neck.
“Sshhh, lovely.. It’s okay. I am mad, but we’ll figure it out tomorrow. I still love you. Now go to sleep”
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specialagentlokitty · 11 months
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Buck x reader - my shield
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A Buck (911) shy reader please? His friends thinks Buck is making things up that he has a girlfriend or shy reader picked her best friend to be they godfather of their newborn son who’s a mama boi. Then Buck thought it’s a good idea bringing his friend to the hospital to see his family - Anon💜
Buck smiled down at his phone as he saw the message notification from you, and he opened the text.
“What’s got you so happy?” Eddie asked.
Everyone looked up from where they were sat over to the young firefighter.
“My girlfriend messaged me.” Buck beamed.
“We’re still going on about that? Really?” Chim laughed.
Buck furrowed his brows a little bit.
“What do you mean?”
“Well, we know you, you’ve probably slept with more women then everyone here combined. No offence.” Hen said.
Buck put his phone into his pocket.
“I’m capable of having a girlfriend!”
“We’re not saying that! We’re just saying it’s not likely.” Chin snickered.
Buck stormed away, and when his shift ended he immediately went to your apartment and knocked on the door.
It didn’t take long for you to answer, and one looked at him and you had your arms around him.
Buck hugged you tightly, burying his face into your shoulder as he let out a deep sigh.
You placed your hand on the back of his head and just held him for a few minutes in silence, standing out in the hallway of the apartment complex.
“What’s wrong…?” You whispered.
You pulled away and slowly dragged him into your apartment and closed the door, leading him over to the couch.
Sitting him down, you sat cross legged next to him, taking his hands in yours as you gazed at him.
“I’m.. im so fed up of everyone saying I don’t have a girlfriend!” He exclaimed.
You furrowed your brows a little bit.
“They think because I was a dick when I first joined I still am. But I’ve been trying to tell them for months I’m not like that anymore…” he mumbled.
You gave Bucks hands a small squeeze and smiled softly at him.
“I know you’re not Evan.”
He sighed softly.
“It’s just frustrating you know… I want them to believe me…”
You nodded your head in understanding.
“Well, they’re doing that BBQ tomorrow… right?”
Buck nodded his head and looked up at you.
“I’ll come with you.”
“You don’t like things like that.”
“No. But you do, and then they can see you’re telling the truth.”
You smiled sweetly up at him, and Buck smiled back, leaning down to capture you in a soft kiss before he pulled away.
“You’re amazing…”
He wrapped his arms around you and pulled you into him, cuddling you while you guys just watched some crappy films.
When the next day rolled around, you both got ready to go to the station for the BBQ.
It was his day off, but he said he’d go anyways, and since he was going you wanted to go with him to show everyone he wasn’t lying and you were real.
But as you guys drove there, you were nervous. You couldn’t stop fidgeting and when Buck pulled his car into a spot, he stopped and reached over, taking your hand in his.
“You don’t have to do this you know that right?”
He looked at you in concern and you smiled at him, nodding your head.
“I know. But I.. I want to.”
Buck smiled and nodded his head and you both got out of the car, and he took your hand in his, letting you hide yourself behind him slightly.
He smiled down at you.
“When you’re ready to go we’ll go.” He said softly.
“Thank you…”
He led you around the front of the building and you saw a group of people all laughing and talking.
“And he finally shows up!”
“Shut it Chim.” Buck snapped.
You squeeze his hand and he sighed, giving you an apologetic look.
“And he’s brought company, who’s this?” Bobby smiled.
“Guys, this is (Y/N). My girlfriend.”
You gave them a shy wave and all they could do was stare in shock as they looked at you.
You were so different from Buck, shy, quiet, but they could only smile warmly at the sight of you using him as your shield
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clanwarrior-tumbly · 9 months
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HCs: Ken meeting a Human!Fem!Reader who owns a ranch
Wanted to write something for this movie bc it’s all I’ve been thinking about for the past two days. So enjoy, lovelies! 
I’m taking requests for this movie so don’t be shy <3 
[SPOILERS AHEAD]
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...........
After going back to the Real World to find a purpose for himself, Ken runs into you, a country girl who left the Mattel company to take care of your ranch.
You just stopped in the city to find new outfits..and instead found him rollerblading through the park, immediately recognizing him as a Ken.
You may not be in the company anymore but you just knew (especially with his vibrant outfit giving it away).
You two hit it off right away and eventually you go shopping together.
He gets a new cowboy outfit and is bashful when you pay for it (to which you reply that you..really didn’t have a choice in the matter, as he had no money).
He’s like “ohh that happened before when I was with Barbie..we got arrested for the second time that day :D”
You’re very concerned and decide that he should stick with you from now on (not that anyone at Mattel would ever care about a Ken running around to begin with...you just didn’t wanna have to bail him out of jail).
On the truck ride back to your home, you mentioned owning a ranch and Ken’s in a w e
You tell him more about it, and he’s so intrigued and can’t stop staring at you the entire time, especially as you go on about how a lot of women in your world are cowgirls and how they aren’t represented enough.
He bluntly states that he once believed “patriarchy” was all about the horses and you nearly laughed, but he seemed sad about it, so you assure him if he wanted to see horses, he made the right decision coming with you.
You introduce him to one of your favorite steeds and he’s SO overjoyed to actually see one in person. Like petting its mane and asking dozens of questions like an excited kid.
“Are you sure Barbieland didn’t have any horses of their own?”
“No, we just have the ones on sticks and our imaginations.” He pouts, mimicking the way he rode invisible horses with his hands. “But this? This is WAY cooler!!”
He tries mounting your horse, envisioning himself riding off into the sunset, free as a bird while shouting “yeehaw” at the top of his lungs-
Only for it to rear its head up and nearly stomp on his foot, with you having to calm it down as he snaps back to reality, looking utterly distraught and stressed over upsetting it.
“Alrighty. Ken. If you wanna ride a horse..the first step is earning its respect. Thought you would’ve learned about that in those books....but if you’ll let me, I’ll show you how to properly mount one. Luckily this one here’s accustomed to double riders.”
His face lights up and he listens to every instruction you give him, from placing the saddle on its back to climbing on, and finally how to control the direction he wants it to go.
For this one time, however, you take the reins and let him sit behind you, hugging you a bit too tightly for your liking, but you allow it as you show him around the rest of your ranch.
He just likes the closeness fr and you.
By the time the day’s over, your horse got better acquainted with Ken and let him ride around for a little while before you gotta put it in the stable for the night.
Before he could worry about where he was gonna go, you tell him he can stay with you as long as he wants.
He’s so happy he just,,,,breaks down ugly crying into your arms.
Though he quickly apologizes, admitting he’s still getting used to crying freely and being more emotional and-
“It’s okay, Ken.” You reassure him. “We need more guys like that around here who ain’t afraid to shed a tear or two.”
“Th-Thanks...Barbie told me it’s an amazing feeling. And honestly..it kinda is.”
After that small heart-to-heart talk, he gifts you his horseshoe necklace as a sign of his appreciation, that dopey grin returning to his face when you take it and wear it right away.
Yeah, you’ve only met each other for a day and he’s smitten the moment you started treated him as an equal. You let him have his own room, bed, wardrobe, etc. (and in time he'll have his own horse too).
All you ask is that he helps you manage the ranch, but at this point he’s willing to do anything for you now.
Finally, he realizes this was his dream all along.
One that Barbieland couldn't provide, but that was alright.
Patriarchy is overrated, anyways. This was all he wanted.
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mirkoluvs · 10 months
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★ GETTING INTO AN ARGUMENT WITH MHA CHARACTERS (PT. 2)
characters: midoriya, bakugo, todoroki
genre: comfort !!
notes: find part 1 here !! i’ve been busy with stuff, sorry for not getting this out sooner!
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izuku midoriya
- a day had passed since he flipped out at you
- he knew he messed up but you were letting him know he messed up.
- every time he texted you he’d always end up being left on read or delivered.
- even at school when he tried to come up to you, you’d always end up running towards somebody else and joining into a conversation with them.
- he wasn’t going to give up until he finally talked to you and figured things out though
- which is how he ended up in front of your dorm room door at 9 pm at night.
izuku let out a nervous exhale before raising his fist to knock on your door. fighting his nerves, he shook his head and hit his fist against it gently. “coming!”, you chirped, pushing yourself out from your desk to answer the door. a faint smile arose on his face at the sound of your positive voice, but quickly got washed away by nerves once he saw the door begin to open. when you opened the door and saw izuku there, you rolled your eyes, beginning to shut the door, but you were quickly stopped by izuku shoving his foot into the space between the door, slipping his hand in as well so he had a hold on the door. “y/n, please talk to me”, he muttered, trying to look you in the eyes. “hasn’t enough been said? what happened to you and your “limits”?”, you sarcastically asked, putting emphasis on the limits part. he sighed, looking down at the ground. “listen, please. i really, really didn’t mean all of that. i was just so overwhelmed and exhausted but i know that doesn’t excuse me snapping on you like that. i don’t know where i’d be without you watching over me all the time”, he spoke, his voice was passionate and somewhat shaky. “i love you so much, y/n. i wouldn’t be where i am without you, and i’m so, so sorry for taking that all out on you”, he finished. only hearing silence back from you, he got nervous. slowly looking up, he was faced with the sight of you with tears glistening in your eyes. his eyes widened as he panicked. “oh no… i’m sorry, i’m sorry! was it something i said? shit-“, “no- no, you’re fine, zuku. this is perfect, actually. thank you”, you cut him off, a small tear falling down your face as you quickly wiped it away. izuku sighed as he pushed the door out of the way and pulled you into a hug. “i love you so much and i’m so sorry”, he told you again, pressing a soft kiss to your head. “it’s okay, i love you too”, you sighed, snuggling into his hold. “i thought you were gonna break up with me for a second…”, he confessed. you let out a laugh at this, causing him to laugh a bit as well. “i’d have to go crazy to break up with you”.
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katsuki bakugo
- yeah… he was losing it 💀
- he expected you to get over the whole situation overnight and things would go back to normal the next day, but it was the complete opposite.
- you ignored him constantly throughout the entire day.
- even when he’d call out your name, you’d act like you didn’t hear anything.
- his final straw was when you tried to walk home without him.
- that’s when he snapped, he was tired of the hard feelings between you two and he couldn’t deal with it anymore, he wanted to fix it.
you felt a hold on your wrist that caused you let out a slight shriek, but you quickly calmed down when seeing who’s touch it was. of course, it was katsuki. “are we gonna talk about this or are you just gonna keep ignoring me?”, he asked, and surprisingly he seemed genuine too. “you made it known what place this relationship has in your life, i really don’t see what else there is to talk about”, you answered, your voice raw and harsh. he hated this side of you, and he hated being the reason for it. “i don’t- can you just listen to me?”, he somewhat begged, his voice quickly descending from annoyance to calmness. your eyes somewhat widened at his urgency. it wasn’t often that you saw him be so vulnerable in a sense, honestly you don’t ever recall seeing him like this. “i’m listening”, you muttered, crossing your arms over your chest as you stared at him, waiting to hear what he could possibly say. you had a hard time believing that he was actually about to take accountability for everything because based on previous events, he didn’t seem like the type to do so, ever. “ok… i know i fucked up. i’m not gonna stand here like a moron and act like there was a good reason for forgetting our anniversary because there wasn’t. i was just caught up with all my training that it slipped my mind, but i know that doesn’t make up for shit. and all those things i said last night, i didn’t mean it. any of it, i was being fuckin’ careless with my words. it wasn’t “just some anniversary”, it’s a big ass milestone, i know that and i wanna make it up to you. i treated you like straight shit and i regret it so, so bad. i… i’m sorry”, he spoke firmly, making sure you knew his words were genuine, and you definitely did. your eyes were blown open, shocked at the speech he just gave. you never thought you’d ever see him so apologetic or ever hear him say things like these. you could feel tears pricking your eyes, but you quickly pushed them away, letting out a soft giggle. he raised an eyebrow but quickly lost his composure when you jumped into his arms, holding onto him tightly. “t-thank you katsuki. this means the world to me, seriously. i forgive you”, you sniffled, hiding your face in his neck. he let out a chuckle, hugging you back. “yeah, yeah. and i’m serious ‘bout what i said, im gonna take my sweet girl on a proper anniversary date, alright?”, he smirked, rubbing your back. “yeah, that sounds perfect”.
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shoto todoroki
- the difference between shoto and the other two is that he didn’t even wait till the next day to talk to you 😭
- he wanted to make things right between you two and fast, you knew how much he hated ending things on a bad note between you two.
- he made his way to your dorm, determined to gain your forgiveness
- it was when when he got to your dorm and heard sniffling from the outside, his heart ached. he knew how bad he messed up.
leaning against the door separating you from him, he heard soft sobs and sniffles, causing his heart to ache a bit. he never wanted to be the one responsible for your tears and sadness. he was meant to be the person to take that all away from you, but yet here he was, being the reason you were crying alone in a dark room late at night. he gently knocked against the door, and once he did the noises behind the door came to an immediate stop. “y/n, it’s me… can we talk?”, he asked, his fist still on the door as he waited for an answer. a few seconds went by, nothing. he knew you were in there, so he figured you were either ignoring him or just didn’t want to face him. “i know you’re in there, but i understand if you don’t want to talk to me right now… i’ll still say what i have to say anyway”, he started, clearing his throat. on the other side of the door, you were scooting closer to the door, wanting to hear what he had to say. you weren’t going to open the door, you couldn’t face him with how much of a mess you were in. you didn’t want him to see you in such a weak state because of him. “i’m so sorry for what i said earlier. i didn’t mean any of it. my father gave me a hard time when i visited and natsuo was also pushing it with him, it was just a mess. that’s why i was so upset, but that doesn’t matter anymore. i should’ve talked to you instead of holding it all in. it’s like you said, if i keep holding in all my problems, i’ll burst, and that’s what happened. you didn’t deserve that at all, and i’m so sorry. i didn’t mean any of it”, he confessed. he waited a couple moments, praying that you’d respond. when he heard nothing, he rested his forehead against the door, sighing. “i’m not leaving until i know you’re okay”, he muttered. little did he know on the other side of the door, you were tearing up all over again. you quickly stood up, unlocking the door and whipping it open as you jumped into his arms. he was startled but quickly wrapped his arms around you, sighing with relief. “i love you, sho… it’s all fine now, i forgive you”, you told him, your voice a bit shaky as you smiled, hiding you face in his neck. “i love you so much more”, he muttered. he took you out of his arms for a moment, taking your face into his hands. he let out a sad sigh at your bloodshot eyes and red nose, feeling so guilty. “i’m sorry, so sorry my love”, he muttered, pressing a soft kiss to your lips and then your forehead. “it’s alright now, just promise me you’ll talk to me from now on, ‘kay?”, “i promise”.
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© mirkoluvs. please do not copy, modify, or repost on other platforms. thank you !!
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astronomysturniolos · 3 months
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chris sturniolo x book lover gf-reader!!
admiration in silence
summary: chris loves you, and your reading habits, but what happens when you can’t concentrate anymore because he can’t contain himself from distracting u? (fluff)
warnings: none
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as the sun sets, it gets darker in my room, the only light source are my fairy lights draped over my white walls. the sunset casts a perfect, yellow cast on chris’s face, as he scrolls mindlessly on his phone, laying facing me. i’m sitting up, reading the new book he bought me. he loves buying me books, or really anything. he thinks it’s “mad cute” that i read, and he’s so entertained by it he keeps buying me more to the point that it’s almost covered my whole book shelve. his love language is definitely buying me things. at first i hated it, but i’ve grown to love it now that we’ve been dating for around 8 months.
i’m so engulfed with my book, i don’t even notice that the random sounds from his phone had suddenly stopped until i feel his hand start to gently caress my arm, causing me to shiver.
“what are you doing, chris?” i say kind of in an annoyed tone, which is totally fake because i can never be annoyed at him. “nothing ma, just keep reading” he says not connecting eye contact with me, instead focused on my arm, which is now coated in goosebumps.
i try to focus on my book, but i keep losing my spot, too focused on his touch. “chrisss.” i say, dragging the s out. “what baby?” he asks, lightly chuckling. “you’re distracting me.” “i don’t care.” he says still not lifting his gaze and hand away from my arm.
after a while i begin to get into my book, until i hear the snap of a camera. my head quickly turns to him. “CHRIS.” i yell, laughing slightly. “i’m sorry you just look too cute, ma” he says smiling at the picture on his phone.
i put my bookmark into my page, and drop it onto my nightstand. laying facing him as he sets his phone down on the bed and finally looks at me. his goofy smile widening and i smile too, a blush creeping on my face. i dig my head into his chest as he kisses the top of my head, and brushes his fingers through my hair. “i love your hair.” he states “i love everything about you actually, is that weird?” he asks, but it’s not really a question because he doesn’t really care. “well then call me a wierdo because i love everything about you too” i say, slightly muffled, considering my face is still in his chest, and his hands are still in my hair. he laughs, and then it goes quiet for a minute. a comfortable silence actually. then he whispers “i love you baby. so much.” if i thought i couldn’t fall in love even more with him, i was lying. “i love u to chris.” i say tiredly. we stay in that position, laying with each other, until we fall asleep, intertwined like we were made for each other.
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anna speaks: this would be so me coded if he gave me one chance🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻i lowkey hate this, bc i kinda rushed but anyways hope yall liked this🤗🤗feedback is very appreciated!!
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itsthewritergal · 4 months
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Please can I hold you? - Bucky.Barnes x Reader
Hello my loves,
I'm trying to be better this year at writing.
Summary: Y/N leaves, and Bucky tries his hardest to fix it.
TW: Kissing, trauma, family trauma, shouting, swearing, (let me know if I've missed some)
January 1st, it was supposed to be their year. They had promised each other that this was it, Bucky and Y/N. Bucky had promised no more long missions away from Y/N, Y/N had promised that she would move in with Bucky so they could finally spend more time together. A good year was what they wanted, what they deserved, what they needed.  But here they were screaming at each other over Bucky not kissing Y/N at midnight. Y/N had explained to Bucky multiple times that she was at the edge, she couldn’t cope anymore with arguing, and whilst Bucky never admitted it, he hated it just as much, if not more than Y/N. Yet here they were. 
“And another thing, I didn’t even want to go to Nat’s stupid New Year’s eve party” Bucky screamed ‘I wanted to be at home with you’ was the bit he failed to include in his insult. 
“You told me you wanted to be with people you loved on New Year’s Eve, I thought it would be fun” She shouted back “You think it was fun for me? Because it fucking wasn’t. All I wanted to do was come home, the whole night, but you wanted to keep drinking” She seethed, Bucky wanted to tell her it wasn’t true. He didn’t want to drink, but he stupidly got caught up in the party. 
“Now you’re going to get at me for drinking? Like you don’t do it every single weekend” He shouted, “Thor never brings that fucking mead, I deserved to have a nice night” He was being mean intentionally, but he couldn’t stop. 
“I never said you didn’t Buck” She said her voice suddenly quieter, Bucky should have noticed it was because she was getting upset but he didn’t. 
“Do you have any idea how hard I’ve been working? I just wanted one nice night” Bucky should have stopped himself, he knows he should stop but he couldn’t. He was angry at himself for not putting his foot down and saying he wanted to spend time with just Y/N. 
“One nice night?” Y/N parroted “The nights we have aren’t nice? Is that what you’re saying?” 
“No! You’re twisting my words” Bucky snapped, he spoke with insecurity but it came across as anger and Y/N didn’t like that 
“Because I’m the bad guy right? James Bucky Barnes can’t put a foot wrong, but I can. That’s all I do right?” Y/N said, her fears coming to the surface. The insecurity was all from her messed up childhood, Bucky knew that from their late night chats, when they’d lay next to each other and confess everything, but he didn’t realise that the fear was seeping into their relationship. 
“That’s not what this is about” Bucky said realising suddenly how far he had taken the fight, and how distraught Y/N was becoming 
“Isn’t it?” Y/N snapped, her eyes locked onto Bucky as a target.
“You’re making this worse than it needs to be” Bucky said, unknowingly adding more fuel to the fire 
“Yeah that’s me isn’t it? Making everything worse. Don’t worry Buck, I get it” She snapped turning away from Bucky 
“Where the hell are you going?” He called after her 
“Downstairs Buck, I need some space away from you right now” She stormed out of their bedroom and down the stairs. Bucky sat down on their bed with his head in his hands, he had just fucked everything up. 
Taking a deep breath Bucky decided to set an alarm for 10 minutes, and once it had gone off he would go and speak to Y/N calmly about his feelings. That was how they were going to fix it. He knew he had messed up but he would fix it. 
Y/N stood in their hallway, and listened to Bucky close their bedroom door. She knew she had blown things out of proportion, she had made things worse. The little voice in her head told her she had messed things up seriously this time. There was no coming back from this. Bucky hated her, she knew that much. The thought along was enough to almost break her, pulling on her trainers she left the house silently, following the little voice down the streets. She twisted and turned around the streets she used to love walking with Bucky, but now they just felt like they were taunting her as she remembered the kisses they had shared at the bus stop, and the stray cat they had wanted to adopt by the street corner.  She couldn’t cope with it, so she began to run. 
The wind blew in her ears, the kind of fierce that stopped her from having to think, it was dark and the street lamps did little to ease her discomfort. She was on her way home, in the desperate hope that Bucky was asleep, or at Steve’s or Sam’s. She had no idea of the time,  having left her phone at home in Bucky’s jacket pocket most likely, but she sent a silent prayer to the sky that it was late enough that Bucky wouldn’t still be around. She couldn’t face him, not after everything she had done. Her mother was right, she wasn’t made for relationships, she would always mess them up, and now she had screwed up the only good thing she had going for her. This was it. She was done. Y/N didn’t notice the way her hands shivered a little with the cold biting wind, with her furious mood and growing insecurity she had forgotten a coat.  As she turned onto her and Bucky’s street the tears started again, this really was the end. Her and Bucky were about to be done, finished, ended. 
So much for their year. She mused to herself silently, revelling in the cruel twist of fate, her mother was right. 
Pushing the handle of the door down quietly, in the hope to not wake Bucky if he was in, Y/N creaked the door open. She took a shaky step into the house, listening out for Bucky. When she was satisfied that there was no sound of him she closed the door behind her and took off her shoes. 
“Y/N?” Bucky’s shaky voice called out, she froze. “Baby?” He said coming into the hall, Y/N put her hand back on the door handle, she was ready to run again, this was not a conversation she was ready to have. 
“Don’t you dare ever scare me like that again” He said wrapping his arms around her tensed body, Y/N kept herself tensed, she was ready to run if she needed. 
“I know you’re scared, I know you think you’ve messed this all up but I swear to you this whole argument is on me” he said refusing to let her out of his embrace, 
“Bucky stop” she said quietly 
“I’m sorry” He said dropping his arms, she looked up at him with red eyes “Could you come and sit down in the lounge for me?” He asked 
“I should go” 
“No” Bucky said “You’re going to come and sit down and we are going to talk about this, because we are bigger than your insecurities and we are going to fix this” he said, 
“Oh,” Y/N said “oh” She repeated once the words had settled into her head “You aren’t breaking up with me?” 
“Come on doll, come sit down for me?” He said 
“Ok” She said, following Bucky through their house. 
Y/N settled herself into an armchair, where she could curl her legs up underneath herself. Bucky opted for the sofa opposite her, picking up on the fact that she didn’t want to touch him just yet. 
“Before we start, the next time you need to get away you tell me where you’re going. I was terrified doll, I know the kind of people that are out there and if you need space, please let me come with you. I promise I won’t walk beside you or speak to you but I need to know you are safe.” Bucky said “Please?” 
“I’m sorry Buck” She said,
“No apologies. We have to make mistakes to fix them for the future yeah?” He said 
“I don think I can do this Bucky. All your friends hate me, I invited you to a party you didn’t want to be at, I asked you to cut down your missions. Everything I do, makes me the issue in this relationship” She said, 
“That’s not true, everyone loves you—”
“No they don’t, they put up with me” 
“No, no, Y/N. Please don’t do this. I know you’re spiralling, I know that you’ve always been made to believe that its your fault. But I swear to you this one is on me. I wanted to spend New Years Eve with just you. I wanted to kiss you at midnight, but I fucked up. I got drunk and neglected you. You should have been my priority at midnight, not that stupid drink” 
“I should’ve let you have fun” Y/N said 
“No, I should have kissed you” Bucky said, his tone was final and Y/N didn’t want to argue anymore. 
“I didn’t deserve it” 
“You don’t have to earn love” Bucky said, moving to the carpeted space in front of Y/N’s armchair, taking Y/N’s hands in his he pressed a gentle kiss to her knuckles “I love you, I want to spend my life with you and I will spend every single moment apologising to you for the way I acted” 
“I’m sorry for saying all those mean things Buck” Y/N said “I didn’t mean them I just wanted to make myself the bad person so you could hate me. I wanted you to hate me” 
“Why did you want that?” Bucky asked after pressing another kiss to her hand 
“So you’d end things, so my fears could come true. It’s sadistic, but I guess I’m always just waiting for the end so I just wanted it to happen. Like ripping a bandage off” 
“Oh Y/N” Bucky said gently “You never have to be scared of me leaving. We will always work through our issues, you’re my life. You’re my world, this is it for me.” 
“So you’re not waiting for me to fuck up so you can leave?” 
“No, I’m not” Bucky said 
“I’m sorry” she whispered 
“No more apologies” Bucky whispered “Please let me hold you baby? We can talk more in the morning I promise. But right now I just need to hold you”
“You never need to ask”
525 notes · View notes
httpspedri26 · 6 months
Note
Hi can you do one with Jude with your losing me by Taylor swift like the one you did with pedri?
Your losing me- JB
Jude x reader
Angst
Send requests!
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“I don’t understand what’s your problem. Y/N, it was just a party,” Jude said, rolling his eyes and taking off his jacket. “Jude, I don’t care about the party. I care that you didn’t tell me where you were going. You had me worried all night, not sleeping, waiting for you to come home,” Y/N sighed. “You don’t even answer my messages anymore, Jude!”
Jude's tone grew more frustrated. "Can't you see I need some space?" he snapped. He picked up his jacket again and turned around to leave the room.
“Jude, where are you going?” Y/n rubbed her eyes and sighed as she got out of bed.
“I’m leaving y/n I’m going to a friends house” he said as he slammed the door.
She for the first time in months y/n didn’t feel her heart break anymore. Because she was so used to him leaving the house now.
And he was losing her.
As Y/N looked around the room, she remembered why she and Jude had chosen this house - because of this exact room. They loved it cause of the light.
But now she sits in the dark and wonders if it’s time. Does she throw out everything they built of keep it?
She’s getting tired even for the little things now.
The next morning, Y/N woke up with her eyes puffy and red. She reached out, hoping to find Jude beside her, but all she felt was the cold emptiness of the bed. As she sat up, a heavy sigh escaped her lips.
She quickly got up and went through her morning routine. As she finished her breakfast, the sound of the front door opening caught her attention. "Hey," Jude greeted, making his way into the kitchen and grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge.
"Hey, where were you?" Y/n asked, her gaze fixed on her plate.
"Y/n I don't really want to do this right now," Jude sighed, shutting the fridge door. Y/n furrowed her eyebrows in confusion.
"I just asked a simple question, Jude."
"Yeah, well, I don't want to talk. What part of that don't you understand?"
Taking a deep breath, she set down her fork and stood up, walking over to him. “Jude, we can’t keep avoiding this. Whatever’s going on, we need to talk about it.”
Jude’s shoulders tensed, his gaze fixed on the floor. “I just need some space, Y/n. Can’t you respect that?”
"Jude, I am! I've been giving you space for months. I'm tired, Jude, months!" Y/n snapped, as she glared at him.
"Jude, you're losing me. It feels like you've stopped trying in this relationship. I'm tired of being the only one putting in any effort here," Y/n admitted, her heart heavy. The once-quickened pulse she used to feel around Jude had now turned into a dull ache of frustration and disappointment.
"I try, Y/n. Everything I do is try," Jude whispered, tears streaking down his cheeks. He quickly wiped them away with the back of his hand.
"Yeah, well, you don't show it, Jude. You go out to meet your friends and vanish for hours without a single text. Last time, you didn't even come back home. Do you think I slept that night, Jude? I was worried sick, thinking something had happened to you," Y/n's voice cracked, she was trying to not cry she didn’t want Jude to see her cry, not for him.
“Jude I’ve been sending you signals every single day that I was falling out of love with you, and you just sent them away”
Did she really fall out of love? That was the only thing running through Jude’s mind, that was all he could think about.
“I gave you everything I could Jude, I moved to Spain with you, I left my family behind, I gave you more than I thought I could ever give someone” Jude finally found the courage to look at her in the eyes, Big mistake.
he saw his favorite honey colored eyes bloodshot, he could see the sadness in them, and that tore him apart.
“Don’t ignore me Bellingham”.
“I think it’s best if you just go back to England y/n/n”
And that’s what she did.
723 notes · View notes
fqirysim · 5 months
Text
untitled--
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genre(s): angst, some fluff at the end, exes to best friends to lovers, highschool au, lowercase intended, lots of pov changes
requested: nope !
pairing(s): yang jungwon x reader, ft. yuna (itzy), and intak (p1h)
word count: 7.2k (my longest fic yet ! ) 
warning(s): cursing, underage drinking, a tiny bit of infidelity 
synopsis: you had been in love with yang jungwon since the day you met him. 
note: lowercase is intended, lots of pov changes! (read carefully so you don’t get confused lol). this took me a year to make PLEASE don't judge too harshly i put my heart and soul into this 😭. took me a year to make but could not come up with a title for the life of me, hence why it is called untitled, silly silly me. this was really fun to make though and although it took me a while to make, i'm very proud of it. lmk if you want to be added to my taglist and i will gladly do so !! special thanks to my bestie abby and my bf dean for proofreading love you both <3333
—------
you were certain this was the end of your friendship with jungwon. again. but this time you knew it would be permanent.
he was the boy who lived next door. growing up, you had always admired him from afar. the class president who everyone, including the upperclassmen, seemed to get along with.  
you had liked him until freshman year, when you got tired of pining over someone who didn’t seem to hold any interest in you. as comical as it seems, that was around the time that he had started to take an interest in you. 
and so he courted you, bringing you your favorite drink, walking you home, even coming over for dinner and hanging out at your house. this helped blossom a friendship that no one saw coming, and it wasn’t long until people started to wonder if you two were an item. 
it took two months for jungwon to muster up the courage to ask you to be his girlfriend. 
you were sure you were over your crush on him, that it was just a silly childhood crush. but as you hung out with him more and more, you couldn’t help but fall for him all over again. of course you said yes, because who wouldn’t say yes to the pretty starry-eyed boy standing before you?
jungwon was a nice boyfriend; going on dates quite often, never fought, and he would buy you flowers without being asked.. maybe the latter was why the whirlwind relationship only lasted five months. 
you remember the day so vividly, sitting on the bench at your favorite park; the same park where jungwon had asked you to be his, and here he was, asking you to break up.
 it seemed poetic in a kind of way, starting as his, and leaving as no one’s.
“i’m sorry. i’ve just lost romantic feelings,” jungwon stated, staring down at the grass as a breeze of wind came, the blades of grass swaying slightly. “it’s just that we’ve both been so busy with other things, and i guess we kinda just like, drifted apart because of it.”
“yeah, i think so too,” you replied nonchalantly, ignoring the slight sting in your heart. 
his head snapped up, your eyes finally meeting his, “wait, actually? you’re not lying?” the sound of relief in his voice made your heart feel like it was being squeezed.
“do you want to get rid of me that bad?” you instead teased with a grin. 
“no!” he exclaimed with wide eyes. “i still wanna be friends with you. i might not like you romantically anymore, but i don’t wanna like, lose the friendship we have, you know?”
“yeah,” you replied, “we can still be friends.”
and you two meant it. there were no tears, and no broken hearts (that you would like to admit). it was just a simple case of the right person and the wrong time, and as the years continued, you tried to convince yourself that it was just nothing. that jungwon was not your “right” anything- he was just your best friend, nothing more, nothing less. 
you were almost successful. until your last year of high school approached. 
you and jungwon kept your word, you stayed friends. always being seen together; walking to class, walking home, studying in the library, eating lunch in the cafeteria. 
people still believed you were together, and you always had to correct them, because no you and jungwon were no longer together and no you were not a thing.
they never believed you, though. 
there was always a small part of you that wanted to say yes when someone would ask. that you and jungwon were a thing and that he was yours and you were his. but you never did, callingyourself crazy for even thinking of doing so. 
you found yourself doing it again as yuna had asked you earlier in the week. 
yuna was the new girl this year, having transferred from jyp high. from what you heard, she was nice, smart, and she was gorgeous. you were never one to put yourself down, but you couldn’t say that you didn’t feel insecure standing next to her. 
“no, jungwon and i are not dating,” you smiled politely. it was almost like a script at this point. “we’re just good friends.”
“that’s good to hear,” yuna smiled, her eyes sparkling. “i just wanted to ask him out, but i wasn’t going to if you had a thing!”
“oh, you’re thinking of confessing to him?” you questioned. there was that little part of you again. the part that always said no! tell them you’re a thing! tell them to not do it!
“yeah, he’s in a bunch of my classes. he’s super smart and polite and he always knows how to make me laugh. and he has such pretty eyes,” she sighed dreamily as her mouth formed into a lovesick smile. 
“well, he has that effect on people,” you grinned. 
i would know, you thought.
 “i say go for it! he’s not particularly interested in anyone, you have a good chance.”
“you really think so?” she asked, eyes wide. 
god, i hope not, you thought. as shitty as it was, you didn’t want jungwon to move on. you felt sick at the thought of him being with someone else. 
“why not?” you said instead. “he’ll be at the library after school today studying, i’m supposed to meet him, but i can just tell him something came up.” 
“oh my god, you’re the best!” she squealed, engulfing you in a hug. “thank you thank you thank you.”
“you’re welcome,” you smiled, wrapping your arms around her, ignoring the green monster growing within you.
—----
it had been four days since your conversation with yuna. every time you saw him, you waited for him to bring up the date with baited breath- but he hadn’t said anything. not yet at least.
or maybe yuna simply didn’t ask him on a date. that’s what you were secretly hoping, at least.
it seemed hoping wasn’t enough. on the fifth day jungwon approached you from down the hall with those twinkling eyes and a bright smile you love so much, he seemed more energetic than usual with a little hop in his step. 
“you’re not gonna believe what happened today!” he exclaimed as he reached you at your locker. 
you could believe it. you were the one who hooked yuna up after all. yet you feigned curiosity as you looked at him quizzically, “what is it?”
“yuna asked me on a date! me! of all people! she’s so cool and smart and nice and pretty,” he said with a dreamy look on his face. 
you knew that look. the far away gaze as he thought of her. it was one you would never forget. it’s how he used to look at you. that lovesick grin and those twinkling eyes.
 it had never bothered you before when jungwon had crushes on other girls, because well, that’s all they were. they never escalated into anything more. looking at his lovestruck expression, realization hit that jungwon wasn’t yours anymore. 
you shouldn’t have thought of it that way. you should be happy for him! you should’ve been celebrating with him and cheering him on!  
you couldn’t help the bittersweet smile on your face as you replied, “oh, well that’s nice.”
his smile faltered slightly at your expression, concern slowly forming on his face.  
“are you okay?” he asked. 
“i’m fine, don’t worry,” you said, regaining your composure. “i’m happy for you! and don’t worry about spending less time with me, you’re gonna be a busy guy now! with a girlfriend…”
“okay, she is not my girlfriend. and even if she was, I would never ditch you!” 
“yeah whatever you say, loverboy,” you joked, giving him a playful nudge with your shoulder. 
“no seriously, y/n,” he replied, softly. “are you okay with yuna and i being a thing? i just don’t want it to be weird because you and i used to be a thing, and i know we’re both over that but i just wanted to make sure-,”
“what, me?” you scoffed, cutting the boy off. “what you and i had wasn’t serious, it was just some dumb high school fling.”
even as you spoke those words, you knew they weren’t true. it was more than just a fling. you loved him and maybe you still did. 
silence hung between you, the hallway getting quieter as the remaining students scrambled to their classes, the late bell ringing, leaving you and jungwon in the hallway alone. 
he looked hurt at what you said. you immediately wanted to take it back, to say you didn’t mean it and that he was your first love and you didn’t want him going on that date with yuna. 
“sorry, i shouldn’t have said that,” you muttered, not being able to meet his eyes and instead turning to close your locker. 
“no, you don’t have anything to apologize for,” he replied, as he started to back away, making his way to his class down the hall. “you’re right, it was just a fling, and honestly, it’s so weird to think of us as a couple.” 
it was like your world was falling apart around you as he spoke. did you interpret his hurt expression wrong? maybe this all was one-sided. did he not feel his heart breaking like you did? did he not wonder occasionally (or everyday) how his life would be if you were still together? did he not miss what you had?
maybe there really was nothing between you and jungwon but friendship. 
“yeah, so weird,” you awkwardly smiled, walking to catch up with him. “but you and i, we’re good, right?”
“yep, no worries,” he grinned back. 
“good,” you smiled. “so when’s your date?” 
his eyes brightened ever so slightly as you asked. he started to describe his date– how he was going to take her to the beach and have a picnic and play in the sand. 
you nodded along, your mind wandering off to when jungwon would take you on beach dates, burying him in the sand, splashing him with water and swimming away before he could splash you back. 
you looked over at the boy in question, his starry eyes wide as he talked about his date plans, his smile wide and giddy, his tone as sweet as honey as he talked about her. 
you knew you shouldn’t villainize yuna– she was a nice girl, a very nice one. it wasn’t her fault you were still in love with jungwon, and it surely wasn’t her fault that she liked him. it’s not like you could choose who you could fall in love with. 
you of all people would know. 
so you smiled and nodded along as you walked him to class, listening to him go on and on about his plans. you finally settled with the fact then and there, that jungwon would never be yours again. you had to let go. 
—--------
it has been six months since that day. the day that you had decided to give up. yuna and jungwon have been inseparable since then. 
he kept to his word though; still studying with you after school, showing up when you needed him, hanging out together. sometimes yuna would tag along, which you didn’t mind. she was fun to be around. 
you also didn’t mind being the third wheel when she was around, instead teasing the couple and even offering to take pictures for them. they were a lovely couple and they were seemingly happy– jungwon especially, and that was all that mattered. 
the school year was coming to an end, and seeing as it was your senior year, people were throwing parties almost every weekend. 
you went every once in a while, had some fun, did some underage drinking, even flirted with a couple of people. 
tonight was the party though. 
intak was throwing his first party of the year, and everyone knew his parties were legendary. 
you sat in the uber with jungwon and yuna, anticipating the night before you. you were excited, to say the least. the last time you went to a party was a  month ago, and you were ready to have fun. you even put on your best party outfit for tonight!
you arrived at intak’s house (or more like a mansion), and started to make your way inside until jungwon stopped you. 
“wait! before we go in, i think we should go over some basic safety rules!” jungwon exclaimed. 
you rolled your eyes with a small laugh as you replied, “only you would go over safety rules at a party.” 
“i’m serious, y/n, really bad things could happen,” he shot back with a pointed expression. 
“okay wonie, go ahead, we’re all ears,” yuna smiled supportively.
you ignored the slight heart ache at yuna using your old nickname for jungwon- the one you used when you were together. 
get it together, y/n you thought. letting go, remember?  
you instead smiled and nodded reassuringly at jungwon, who looked over at you to make sure you were paying attention. 
he sighed before continuing, “okay, i won’t be doing any drinking so i can babysit you guys all night. if you need to use the bathroom give your drinks to me so i can watch them. and y/n, if you leave the party at any point, for any reason, please let me know first.”
“sir, yes sir,” you muttered. 
“now let’s go have some fun!” yuna exclaimed, dragging the both of you by the wrists. 
you finally entered the house, where there seemed to be everyone from your school. even kids who graduated last year were in attendance, and as you searched the party for a familiar face that wasn’t jungwon or yuna, intak strolled over, a wide smile on his face. 
“you guys made it!” he shouted over the loud thumping of the music. he was wearing a letterman jacket with a white shirt underneath, and a pair of baggy straight legged jeans. the outfit looked so good on him that you had almost forgotten that you were talking to intak of all people. 
“you look nice, y/n,” he grinned.
you would’ve had a crush on him if he didn’t flirt with every girl he laid eyes on, and it seemed like his victim of the night was you. but damn did he look good right now. 
intak wasn’t a bad guy, he seemed harmless, not like the guys who wouldn’t take no for an answer. he just always flirted, with no intentions of making anything serious. most of the girls he talked to never knew the latter though. 
but you thought it couldn’t hurt, you were here to have fun, and if flirting with intak was the way to do it, then so be it. 
you saw jungwon step forward, about to tell intak to back off and go flirt with someone else, causing you to put your hand on his arm to stop him. 
you also noticed how yuna examined the scene in front of her; jungwon trying to be your knight in shining armor, and you with your hand on his arm to stop him. her eyes narrowed slightly in thought as you dropped your hand and turned to intak. 
“why don’t you get me a drink and then we can talk?” you smiled dazzlingly. you usually reserved smiles like that for when you wanted to flirt and get wasted, and just as usual, it worked like a charm.
“i’ll be right back then,” intak smiled, before making his way through the crowd of bodies in search of a drink for you. 
“really, y/n, intak out of all people?” jungwon questioned, arms crossed. 
“yeah, and what about it?” you replied, feeling slightly annoyed at his tone of voice. he had never acted this way towards you before, but you didn’t like it. it wasn’t his business who you flirted with. he talked to you like you were an idiot and you hated the thought of him looking down on you.  
yuna awkwardly stood between the two of you, not wanting to be in the middle of your fight, but not wanting to go off by herself at a party filled with people she barely knew. 
“‘what about it?’” jungwon mocked your voice in a high pitched tone. “you know how he is, don’t be dumb.”
“dumb? i’m here to have fun, jungwon, not to play third wheel again,” you snapped back. “and why does it matter, you’re not my boyfriend, and you’re not my brother, so it’s really none of your fucking business.”
yuna had been looking back and forth between you and jungwon, watching as you glared at each other, waiting for someone to say something. it was like watching a tennis match. 
at that moment, intak arrived, back with a red solo cup in hand. 
“a drink for the prettiest girl here,” he announced, handing the cup over to you. 
“why thank you love,” you replied with an innocent smile as you looked over at jungwon, still glaring at you, his arms crossed against his chest.
ignoring him, you took a sip of the drink you were given, your face scrunching up at the bitter taste. 
“hey intak, why don’t we go dance?” you asked, reaching for his hand. 
“that sounds like fun,” he replied with a smile of his own before you led him to the dance floor, leaving an enraged jungwon, and a slightly annoyed yuna behind you.
—-----
yuna had seen the way jungwon looked at you. she might have been a bit oblivious at first, but as time went on and she spent more time with the two of you, it became more and more apparent– jungwon had never gotten over you. 
at first yuna thought she could sway him, to get him to fall for her the way he fell for you. but it never worked. he looked at you like you were his own personal angel. no matter where you were, who you were with, how you looked, he was absolutely enraptured by you, and oh, how yuna wished he looked at her like that. 
it had been fifty minutes since your small tussle, and yuna and jungwon sat outside, occupying two pool chairs as he angrily took sips of his water. 
“it’s like she doesn’t even care, she just ran off with him knowing he’ll never want anything serious, knowing he’s gonna lead her on, and i swear when she comes crying to me, i’m gonna tell her ‘i told you’ right to her stupid dumb face,” he rambled, placing his bottle of water harder on the table than he intended to, spilling droplets in the process. 
“well, she’s young and single, and she just wants to have fun baby, there’s nothing wrong with that,” yuna replied. “and she has a point, you’re not her brother or anything, so why do you care so much?”
jungwon  looked up at yuna, not being able to ignore the bitter tone in her voice, “wait, you’re supposed to be on my side.”
“i’m not on anyone’s side, i’m just asking as your girlfriend why you care so much. because honestly, if i didn’t know any better, i would think that you were still in love with her,” yuna sighed, exasperated. 
“i am not in love with her, i like you!” he exclaimed, way faster than he should have. 
yuna wanted to believe him. she wanted to ignore every bit of doubt in her body and believe every lie he fed to her, but she couldn’t. not when she knew you loved him too. it was heartbreaking, really. to watch the person you love pine over someone else. but it was even worse knowing the feelings were reciprocated. 
“don’t lie to me, jungwon,” she deadpanned, feeling her eyes start to water with tears of frustration. “i see the way you look at her, and i know for sure you haven’t gotten over her. you have never once looked at me the way you look at her, and if you like her, just say that. just say that and we can end things here, without having to make this any more heartbreaking than it already is.”
yuna didn’t want to cry. the last thing she wanted to do was cry, but the feelings of anger and embarrassment had overwhelmed her, causing a few traitorous tears to spill. she was angry at herself for letting it get this far, for falling in love with a boy that she knew would never love her back. 
but she was also embarrassed. embarrassed that she had even tried to make an effort, that she had thought she could win him over. 
she wiped her face with the back of her hand, only for more to spill out, a sob fighting for an escape from her quivering lips. 
jungwon raised his hand to wipe the tears away for her, to cup her face and tell her everything would be okay and that he was sorry. but what was he sorry for? sorry for trying to keep you away from intak? or sorry that maybe yuna was right and he did still love you?
just as he opened his mouth to speak, you stumbled out, words slurring and barely able to walk as you stumbled your way over to them. 
“hey guys!” you exclaimed, as a worried intak came rushing out the house behind you. 
“oh god, y/n, are you okay?” jungwon asked, immediately walking over to your side to support your stumbling figure. yuna would have felt bitter over jungwon rushing to your side faster than he had ever run to hers. yet, despite the devil on her shoulder that told her to be petty, she instead felt worried for you. you could barely even stand up straight.
“what the fuck did you do to her?” jungwon asked, throwing an accusatory look at intak.
“nothing dude, i promise! she was the one who wanted to drink, she had like 5 drinks within the span of like, 10 minutes,” intak replied, panicked. “is she going to be okay? does she have a way to get home safely?”
jungwon looked from yuna to you, who was falling asleep just standing there.
“just take her home,” yuna sighed. “i’m not gonna make you choose because we all know who you’d choose every single time.”
“yuna it’s not like that,” jungwon groaned. “listen, i’ll bring her home, and then i’ll come over tomorrow and we can talk this out, okay? i promise.”
“okay, just get her home safe first,” yuna replied. 
you might have been the biggest obstacle in her relationship, but you were still a nice girl, and you had technically done nothing wrong, so yuna had no reason to want to keep you and jungwon apart. you were also wasted as fuck and there was no way you would be able to get home by yourself without something horrible potentially happen to you. 
jungwon grabbed his almost full water bottle from the table he was sitting at, muttering that he would “need it to sober you up”.
he gave yuna one last reassuring smile before he walked away, you on his back as he tried his best to carry you home. 
yuna sighed as she watched you go. she felt like something bad would happen today, something worse than her argument with jungwon, and she wanted nothing else but to go home and cry. 
all she could do was trust jungwon, even if she knew she already lost him, even if she knew she was never a contestant in the first place.
—------
jungwon almost did it. 
he almost carried you all the way home, but his legs felt like they were gonna give out once he reached the park near your house, and he decided then and there that he needed a break. 
he sat you on the playground set, sitting beside you with a huff. 
you were awake by this point, taking long sips of the water bottle jungwon had given you. you wanted to sober up by the time you got home, but it wasn’t really working, with your words still slurring slightly and your mind all dizzy.
the two of you sat in silence as you gazed at the stars and jungwon thought of his argument with yuna. 
maybe she was right. 
even now, as he glanced over at you, studying the stars, his heart skipped a beat and he felt his face warm up. 
“do you remember when you asked me to be your girlfriend in this park?” you chuckled. “we were so young then, it feels like forever ago.”
jungwon was thrown off by the sudden conversation starter, but still smiled, “yeah, i remember it very well. i felt like i was gonna throw up because i was so nervous.”
you turned your head to look at him and giggled as his smile grew wider. 
“what, what are you laughing at?” 
“nothing, i was just so in love with you then. i used to think that we would be together forever and ride off into the sunset in a carriage.” 
jungwon inspected you as you talked, trying to decipher if there was any meaning behind your words or if it was just the liquor talking. 
“i just thought we were some high school fling?” he half-joked as he nudged you with his shoulder. he didn’t want it to seem like he was serious if you were sobering up. 
he felt his heart start to race as he stared at your slightly flushed face from the drinks you had, your hair fluttering as a soft breeze blew by. you were everything that jungwon had ever wanted, and here you were, telling him how much you used to love him. 
wait, no, what the hell am i doing? jungwon thought to himself. it wasn’t fair to yuna. it was already unfair to her that he only started to date her to get over you. he thought that if he dated her long enough, he would stop loving you and love her instead. 
and he genuinely thought it worked. fuck, he thought. i’m such a shitty person. 
until he saw you with intak, flirting, dancing with him, laughing at his jokes, he had never felt so jealous in his life, and yuna had noticed. and she was upset, which was fair. what wasn’t fair was jungwon using her to get over you. 
use. he hated the icky feeling that word gave him. 
“i lied,” you muttered, snapping him out of his thoughts. 
“what did you say?” jungwon asked, making sure that he had heard you right. 
“i lied,” you repeated, eyes on everything but him. “i loved you, and i think i still do.” 
your eyes finally met his as you continued, “you are everything to me, jungwon. i’ve been in love with you since forever, and i only agreed to break up because you said you wanted to.”
jungwon could feel his heart starting to beat faster as he searched your eyes for any hesitation, any sign that this was a lie, or some sort of joke. his heart beat so fast he felt like he was gonna explode as he looked into your eyes, so earnest and so genuine and so filled with love that he knew you had sobered up. 
you reached for his hands in his lap, interlacing your fingers with his. 
“i can’t keep this from you,” you breathed. “i love you, yang jungwon, and i know you’re dating yuna, but i just have to tell you that i love you, that i always have and it’s okay if you don’t feel the same. i don’t expect you to leave her for me or anything, but i can’t help it anymore. i love you, i love you, i love you.”
silence hung over the two of you as he tried to form a coherent sentence after your confession. it felt like suddenly his brain didn’t know how to make him talk, to make him say i love you too, or to make him do anything, really. 
a minute passed, and then two as jungwon searched your eyes with the same desperation yours had– desperate to love and to be loved by the person sitting in front of you. 
jungwon didn’t know who leaned closer first. he thought it was you but maybe it was him. he didn’t even feel like he was in control of his body as he leaned closer and closer, his hand moving to hold your face, searching your face for any hesitation, for any kind of doubt.
 you were so close that he could smell the perfume you sprayed before you left your house and the drinks that you had earlier that night. 
impatient, jungwon finally closed the gap between the two of you, your soft lips colliding with his. he could have kissed you forever, wanting to stay forever in time there. until realization hit him.
yuna.
he pulled away abruptly, your eyes still closed as you chased his lips with yours. he would have found it cute if he weren’t trying his best not to panic right now. he just kissed you. while he was still dating yuna. 
he thought of the look on yuna’s face if she found out– the angry, hurt expression that she had at the party, and even worse, the tears. he would break the poor girl’s heart. 
“i should go,” jungwon breathed, quickly standing up from his seat beside you. “it’s almost past my curfew.”
“wait, jungwon,” you said, grabbing onto the sleeve of his shirt before he could walk away. “i think we should talk about this before you go.”
“yeah, we can talk later,” he replied dismissively. “i just need some time to think.”
you opened your mouth to say something else– anything else to make him stay, but closed it as you saw he was already speed-walking in the direction of his house. 
you thought that you would lose him forever after your breakup.  you had almost lost jungwon once, and you were nearly positive that you won’t be so lucky to keep him this time. 
you felt sick to your stomach, and you didn’t know if it was from the drinks or from the events that had just occurred, but nonetheless you felt nauseous. 
you hunched over as you started to gag, your vomit flowing out of your mouth, tears streaming down your face. 
you wiped your mouth with your sleeve, rinsing your mouth out with water as you started to tear up. 
before you knew it, you felt sobs rising, your nose stuffed from crying,  your throat getting dry from the sobbing. the embarrassment and sorrow was finally catching up to you– all of the years of repressed love you felt for jungwon, all of the embarrassment from him leaving after you confessed, embarrassment from being a homewrecker– it all came crashing down on you. 
you couldn’t go home like this. you were sober enough to know that, with your tear streaked face, ruined makeup, and vomit smelling breath your parents would put two and two together. 
your hands shakily reached for your phone in your back pocket, dialing your brother’s number and waiting for him to pick up with baited breath. your brother was your only hope. 
“hello?” 
“chan?” you breathed into the phone. “i need to sleepover at your place.”
—----
yuna hated this. 
the waiting, the feeling of dread as she sat on her bed, awaiting jungwon’s arrival. 
the fight that had ensued was horrible, but she believed she made a valid point. if he likes y/n so much he should just go be with her, she thought bitterly. 
jungwon had texted her last night at around 1 in the morning, just to make sure she got home safe. yuna didn’t respond. she instead left him on read, still pissed off from the fight.
she used to get butterflies when he would send her texts to make sure she got home safe. but now she didn’t know if he did it because he liked her or if it was just out of common courtesy. 
yuna was about to just walk to his house herself before she heard a knock on her door. 
“hey it’s uh, me,” she heard jungwon’s muffled voice through the door. “is it okay if i come in?” 
“yeah, let’s get this over with.”
she couldn’t meet his eyes as he walked in, striding over to the corner of her bed. yuna hated waiting, but she now felt dread as the pair sat in silence for a bit, the tension so thick you could cut it with a knife. she had sat nowhere near him.
 usually she’d be cuddled into his side, but she instead opted to sit at the head of her bed, seemingly as far away from him as possible. she was worried that if she was too close to him, she’d crack; she’d look at his doe eyes and forgive him and that would ruin the entire point of her argument. 
“so,” she cleared her throat, interrupting the silence. “did y/n get home safe?” 
“yeah, she’s at her brother’s apartment. he texted me when she got there.”
 “‘when she got there?’ did you not walk her there?” 
“no, he picked her up from the park near our houses. but anyways, i have something important to tell you.” 
yuna felt even more dread seeping into her as he finished his sentence. she should’ve seen this coming from the start. here it comes: the breakup. 
“i kissed y/n last night.” 
yuna’s eyes widened in surprise. she had expected the breakup, yes. she knew jungwon was emotionally cheating, but now he was physically cheating? 
“wait, are you being serious right now?” she laughed in astonishment. she couldn’t believe the audacity of the man sitting in front of her. 
“i know it’s bad. i feel horrible, because an amazing woman like you should never be treated as horrible as i’ve treated you, and i am so so sorry,” jungwon started, tearing up from how bad he felt. “all of the apologies in the world could never make up for how i’ve treated you. i’ve made you feel terrible and i’m just making it worse by breaking up with you to be with her.” 
“i love y/n, yuna. and i’m sorry that i didn’t tell you, or that you had to find out for yourself before i even knew. you are so so perfect yuna-,”
“but i’m just not perfect for you?” she replied, tears starting to form as she breathed those words. 
the silence that followed was more than enough to answer her question. 
she hated this. she hated this so so much. but she didn’t hate you, or jungwon. she just hated how love worked, how she had to fall in love with the one boy who couldn’t love her back. she hated that she gave her heart away to a boy that was never going to belong to her– not fully. 
she wanted to scream, to throw something, hell, maybe even hit him. she instead took a deep breath, composing herself before she said, “okay. go be with her then.” 
jungwon looked over at her, wanting nothing but to comfort yuna. he may not be in love with her, but he did love her, and he still cared for her. 
“i’m sorry, yuna,” jungwon said instead. “you’re an amazing girl, but you should never be anyone’s second choice, and i’m sorry for making you feel like mine.” 
yuna couldn’t even look at him, fidgeting with the strings of the hoodie she wore. 
“just leave, please,” she muttered. 
she didn’t want him to see her cry, he had already broken her once, she didn’t want him to see her fall apart again. 
with a guilty expression, jungwon hurried away, also not wanting to see her cry again. he felt gross. he felt disgusted with himself for treating her that way. he didn’t like the person he was with yuna, and he felt sick thinking about how heartbroken she was; how she was so hurt that she couldn’t even look at him. 
—------
it has been two weeks since your kiss with jungwon, and you hadn’t heard a word from him since. not a single call or text, hell, he didn’t even acknowledge your existence when you walked by him in the halls. 
you had seen yuna around, but seeing as jungwon wasn’t joined at her hip like he used to be, you assumed that things didn’t end quite so well between the two. knowing that you were the cause made you want to never show your face ever again, especially because of the dirty looks yuna’s friends have been giving you. 
you were relieved it was the last day of the school year; you’d never have to see yuna again and feel the guilt at seeing the sadness in her eyes. 
you walked into the bathroom, wanting to wash your hands after eating your lunch, when you saw yuna, touching up on her makeup in the mirror. she looked at you through the mirror above the sink, before going back to her makeup. 
the tension was so thick you didn’t know if you should just leave or hide in a bathroom stall until she left. 
“i’m not gonna bite, you know,” yuna chuckled. 
you smiled back nervously as you started to make your way to the sink. 
“yuna i’m really sorry,” you sighed, mustering whatever courage and dignity you had left. 
“it’s okay,” yuna replied, finally meeting your gaze. “although it was wrong for you guys to have kissed, i saw the breakup coming from miles away. he was never mine to begin with.” 
you were taken aback just by how calm she was, with the way she spoke those words with such elegance and grace. she had every right to be angry with you, to yell at you and call you a homewrecker. 
“even if you did think you were going to break up, that still doesn’t excuse what i did, and i really am sorry,” you said, trying to project every feeling of sympathy and sincerity you could in that one sentence. “i’m not asking you to forgive me, or jungwon, but i just wanted to tell you that you really are a cool person, and you’ve always been so kind to me, even now. all of this for a boy, and he hasn’t even talked to me in the past two weeks.”
“wait, he hasn’t reached out to you at all?” yuna asked, confused. “i thought he would say something to you at least.” 
“did he say he would?” you replied, confusion reaching you as well. 
“no,” yuna replied, fixing her hair in the mirror. “i just assumed so because he’s in love with you.”
once again, you were stunned by her nonchalance. “he’s not in love with me.” 
“don’t be silly,” yuna smiled softly. “i can’t tell if dating jungwon was the best or worst six months of my life, to be honest.” 
“don’t get me wrong, he was a good boyfriend,” yuna backtracked quickly after seeing the guilt on your face. “he did the usual boyfriend stuff, and he really did try, but i could just always tell that his heart was always yours.” 
you couldn’t meet yuna’s gaze as she said this, your face hot with shame. you felt so bad for her, and you didn’t quite know what to say in response. 
“i’m sorry that things ended this way,” you finally said. 
“it’s okay, it was gonna happen sooner or later,” yuna replied. “but if i’m right, then you should probably go talk to him, he’s probably going insane with guilt right now over me, and over you. bro’s got a lot on his plate.” 
you gave a small chuckle at the last sentence, making yuna smile a bit. 
“well thank you for the talk yuna, but i’ve gotta go. i think i need to go find jungwon.” 
yuna felt her heart break a bit at the words, but she smiled anyways and said bye as she watched you leave the bathroom. yuna didn’t know if she was supposed to cry or feel happy for you and jungwon, but she did know that she was right. again. she knew his heart had always belonged to you. anyone could see that. 
—--------
trying to find jungwon was easier than you expected. he was sitting on a swing, at the park that you became his, then wasn’t his anymore, and then confessed your love to him. there was so much that had happened at this park that it made your head hurt a bit just thinking about it. 
“is it okay if i sit here?” you asked, motioning to the swing beside him. 
“of course you can,” jungwon replied. 
the two of you sat in silence.
“i don’t think we should be friends anymore,” you finally spoke up. 
he jerked his head to look at you, shock coursing through him. “wait, why not?”
you took a deep breath before saying, “i can’t be friends with you anymore because i’m in love with you. there hasn’t been a moment since i’ve met you that i haven’t been.” 
his heart skipped a beat at your words. 
this was it, this is what you’d been waiting for since the day you laid eyes on jungwon. but you didn’t think it would go quite like this. you sat there for a moment as jungwon studied you, and you wished he would say something, anything. 
“but did you ever consider how i felt?” he finally asked, his voice cracking ever so slightly. “have you ever considered that maybe i’ve felt the same way?” 
you felt your breath catch in your throat as he continued, “i’ve seen you everyday since we were five when your family moved in next door. but i didn’t really see you until freshman year, sitting in class by the window, your hair flowing from the breeze that came through, doodling in your notebook instead of paying attention to the lesson. and when you caught me staring, you smiled and waved, and i swear i fell in love with you that day. that day, i knew my heart would always be yours.” 
“so please,” jungwon pleaded. “please, do whatever you want with it. you could break it a million times over and it would still be yours.”
now this, this was exactly you had always dreamed of. 
you couldn’t stop yourself from kissing him, trying to convey all the repressed love you’ve had for him for years through the kiss. you loved him. you loved every single part of jungwon, every flaw, every imperfection, everything that made him him. 
“so does this mean we’re official?” jungwon grinned as he pulled away, a playful look in his eyes. you smiled back, feeling the heart eyes in your gaze and the way your heart melted just by looking at him. 
“took you long enough.” 
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