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#but he still thinks he has more power than her
johnnysuhbmarine · 2 days
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What's my Problem? That's Easy, You.
Pairing: Haechan x reader Description: There’s no one on this planet that you hate more than your roommate’s best friend, Haechan, and he hates you back just the same. Though, sharing a best friend meant you had to see him all the time. When giving into one impulse desire ends with the two of you making out, it quickly develops into a friends (or enemies) with benefits relationship that the two of you agree to keep quiet about. Surely nothing could go wrong, right?  Content warnings: swearing, insults, talk about sex, Haechan in skinny jeans, Haechan’s girlfriend (later ex) is really mean to him, lots of eye rolling and head shaking, sexual harassment from reader’s professor, death (not a main character but it affects Haechan), lots of making out…taking off shirts…etc, Haechan is hot and arrogant but kind of a loser when it comes to y/n (eventually), mention of a choking kink, corpse lyrics, they have sex but it’s closed-door/SFW, Haechan makes one really poor decision, angst with a happy ending. Please let me know if I’ve missed anything. Word count: 21,108 :) A/n: Happy Haechan day! This has been in the works for entirely too long, but I’m excited to finally release a longer fic rather than one shots. This was only written because I had to do something after seeing Haechan in the ISTJ dance practice video cause he’s never left my mind since. Shout out to @fullsunstrawberry for listening to me talk about this fic instead of me actually writing it. Hey bestie, *waves* it’s finally finished :) Please enjoy, or don’t…I can’t tell you what to do. As always, feedback would be GREATLY appreciated :)
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You open the door to your apartment-style dorm room, and when you see a figure on the couch, you assume it’s your best friend and roommate, Jessica. The two of you met in a class last year and you were over the moon at the idea of rooming with her for the rest of university rather than the roommates you currently had at the time. However, instead of laying eyes on your best friend, it’s a guy you’ve never seen before, casually sprawled out on your couch. You jump in surprise and furrow your eyebrows as you address his presence. “Wha- who are you?!”
He moves his gaze from the TV up to where you were, still at the door. “Haechan…Jessica’s best friend? I’m sure she’s talked about me. Who are you?” He replies in a condescending tone, looking completely unenthused to be talking with you and, within seconds, you were beginning to feel much the same. You shake your head, annoyed.
“No, I’m the one who lives here so I’m asking the questions. What are you doing here? How did you get in?” You ask, though now just wondering how long it would be until he left. 
He looks at you as though you were stupid, like talking to you was a waste of his time. Regardless, he gives you somewhat of an answer. “Are you dense? I’m hanging out with Jessica today. She let me in before she went back to go get ready.”
You freeze, anger coursing through your veins at the audacity of this guy. “I’m not dense. God, I hate people like you.” You spit back. Haechan raises his brows tauntingly. 
“‘People like me’ as in?”
“Arrogant dickheads whose brain power is just used to keep track of how many beds they’ve been in.” You finish, rolling your eyes before moving to set down your backpack and grab what you actually came back to your dorm for - your purse. You miss the devilish smirk that Haechan bears on his face, but you don’t miss the cocky laugh that escapes his figure before he speaks up again as you cross the room.
“Strange, I don’t remember bringing up my sex life before this. It must be on your mind then, huh?” He replies seriously, getting you to pause again. You ball your hands into fists, taking a few steps so that you were back in each other’s line of sight before arguing with him some more. 
“This is exactly what I’m talking about. You think everyone is thinking about sex with you. I hate to break it to you, but you’re not that attractive.” You say, more than glad when your last statement came out firm and serious…you typically weren’t good at lying.
Haechan lets out another laugh, stretching his arms up and bringing his hands together at the back of his head. “Yeah?” He questions lazily. “You’re not that hot yourself, sunshine.”
The nickname has your blood boiling. “Never call me that again. Besides, it doesn’t even make sense. You say I’m not hot and then call me sunshine. You know the sun is 15 million degrees Celsius, right?” You remark, but instead of making Haechan feel stupid, you seemingly gave him more ammunition.
“Oh,” he says as though he just figured out the answer to life. “So, you’re a nerd. I get it.” He adds, a stupid grin on his face.
You furrow your brows. “What?”
“You don’t get out much do you? Just spend all your time memorizing pointless facts and praying someone along the way finally has to find that attractive since you know you won’t pull a guy with your looks?”
You freeze, in a deadlocked stare with Haechan, both of your gazes filled with resentment. It wasn’t a pointless fact - you were an astronomy and physics double major, but saying that wouldn’t provide him with anything but more reason to call you a nerd, and the last thing you felt like doing was addressing the part about your looks. Instead, you shake your head, then motion to the purse you were now carrying rather than your backpack. “I’m going out right now, thank you very much. God. Tell Jessica to let me know whenever you’re going to be over. I’ll make sure to never be home for it. I don’t know how she can tolerate someone like you.” You spit out, turning to open the front door again.
“Right back at you.” Haechan replies, not letting up on his glare until the door’s completely closed again, then turning lazily back to the TV just as Jessica walks out from the bathroom.
“Were you on the phone? Who were you just talking to like that?” She questions, eyebrows raised, more than curious at the identity of who riled up Haechan like that.
Haechan shakes his head. “No, I wasn’t on the phone. Your roommate came in…and then left again.” 
Jessica’s face drops from curiosity to disbelief. “You were arguing with y/n like that?!”
Haechan shrugs. “If that’s the name of your irritating roommate, then yeah.” Jessica rolls her eyes, doing the mental calculations of how long this semester was going to feel with her two best friends hating each other.
When you get back from bar and trivia night with your friends a few hours later, your living room couch is back to just being occupied by Jessica. You smile at her as you walk in and lock the door behind you, but her face when you turn back around is more grave than you think you’ve ever seen.
“We’re gonna have to talk about you and Hyuck.” She says seriously, causing your eyebrows to furrow.
“Who the hell is Hyuck?” You laugh, and Jess just rolls her eyes playfully, nodding her head to motion for you to sit down next to her on the couch.
She looks you in the eyes intently. “Haechan.” She says, and your playful demeanor drops in an instant. “His real name is Donghyuck- but that’s besides the point. Look, he’s been my best friend for more than half of my life. He’s had an extra key to wherever I’m living every year of college so far…”
“No.” You answer firmly, and Jessica sighs.
“Y/n, he’s not a bad guy-” She starts, but you shake your head.
“I don’t care if he’s bad, I care that he’s the most aggravating person I’ve ever met. I don’t want him to have a key to this place.”
Jessica raises her eyebrows. “Not even if it doubles as a safety mechanism having someone other than the two of us be able to get in here should we need help?”
Technically, that could come in handy, but you don’t care. “No.” You reply, trying your best to be dismissive of the topic, but it’s apparently really important to Jessica.
“Y/n…” She says softly, and you roll your eyes with a huff of breath.
“Fine, but he’s not allowed to just come over whenever he’s bored. You two need to have set plans for him to use his extra key.” 
“Deal!” She says as she lights up, and you try to imagine yourself in her position - you’d probably want to keep the tradition of giving your best friend an extra key, too…though your other best friend wouldn’t be as annoying as Haechan. Regardless, you liked seeing Jessica happy, and if this was what it took, then so be it.
A week later, you and Jessica found yourselves sitting on the couch watching Bones, a typical after-homework routine. It became disgustingly less typical when your attention was turned to the sound of a key unlocking the door to your dorm. You hide your groan but nothing stops your eye roll as soon as you see Haechan. His gaze passes right over you as he greets Jessica, apparently his goal today was just to pretend you didn’t exist. You couldn’t be too peeved - the last thing you wanted to do was talk to him. However, you could be mad because you don’t remember Jessica saying anything about having plans with him today, and you watch as your one guideline for him having an extra key slips down the drain. 
Jessica doesn’t think anything of it, of course she wouldn’t, he’s one of her best friends. “Hey Hyuck, we’re watching Bones if you want to join.” She says neutrally. Somewhere along the line, Haechan must have figured out you weren’t just a demon in one of his nightmares, because you had the pleasure of being the subject of his reply.
“Not if she’s still going to be here, too.” He says sternly, causing you to scoff.
“I was here first, you dick.”
At your side, Jessica sighs, seeming to know exactly where this was going as Haechan’s eyes light with fire. “Okay idiot, and I was her friend first.” He spits back, making you clench your jaw…and a fist. A multitude of insults could be thrown your way and you would’ve brushed it off, but ‘idiot?’ That gets under your skin every time. Though, because you were Jessica’s best friend, she knew that, and immediately jumped to calm you down. 
“Okay…” She says, gently grabbing you by the shoulders and settling you back down into the couch. “Y/n, you are not an idiot, I promise. And Hyuck…” she continues, moving her flat gaze over to him. “You’re not a dick - though you make it very hard to defend you sometimes.” As Jessica finished, her gaze flicked back and forth between you and Haechan. The two of you shot your gaze off towards completely different walls of the dorm, refusing to look at the other even in the slightest. Jessica waited five seconds for either of you to say anything, but when that didn’t happen, she spoke up again.
“You guys are insufferable.” She begins with a sigh. “You know it’s my birthday this weekend. I was looking forward to being able to spend it with my best friends…all of them.” Her words are soft and you know she’s serious. Your shoulders drop.
“Where are you going with this?” You ask, immediately shutting your eyes in preparation for the answer you knew you wouldn’t want to face.
“Is it even in the realm of possibility for the two of you to get along for just one night? One dinner?” Jessica asks hopefully. You and Haechan finally whip your heads around to face Jessica, a matching look of terror on both of your faces.
“No.”
“Absolutely not.” You respond at the same time.
Jessica rolls her eyes, and you hate it because it meant your responses actually put her in a sour mood…and all you ever wanted as her best friend was for her to be happy. The horrible news is that she knew this, and used it to her advantage against the both of you. “If I put you on opposite sides of the table, could you at least be civil? For me.” She adds, the cherry on top of her already disheartened tone.
You and Haechan take one small glance at each other, enough to reach the same conclusion before you both respond. “Fine.” A smirk reaches Jessica’s face and you shake your head, getting up from the couch to instead find solace in your bedroom, letting Haechan take your spot without another word.
In what you thought was too little time, it was already the evening of Jessica’s birthday dinner. The dress code was fancier than you were used to, but all you had time for was one sigh at yourself in the mirror before Jessica was rushing you out the door. The two of you getting in the car must have been the trigger for her to start going over the game plan again, because the first thing she said as she pulled out of the parking lot of your dorm was, “there’s going to be thirteen of us there tonight. You and Haechan won’t be anywhere near each other, but even so, please just try and not hate him an overwhelming amount tonight.” 
You drop your head to face your lap with a laugh. “Don’t worry. You know me, you know the last thing on my mind is ruining your birthday. I’ll be good.” 
Her light laugh and nod in response let you know she believed you, and as she pulled to a stop light she looked your way for a moment. “You look gorgeous, by the way.” 
You roll your eyes but it doesn’t stop the smile from spreading across your face. “Look who’s talking.” You say seriously. Your best friend was always gorgeous, but times like these it was hard to do anything but stare. Jessica shakes her head.
“Well, you know. ‘Dress to impress’ and all that.” She replies, and you whip your head towards her, your words coming out as though you were frightened.
“Who are you trying to impress? Please don’t tell me it’s Haechan. Oh my God. No. I can stand the two of you being friends but you cannot date him or I might die.” 
At this, Jessica rolls her eyes, taking time to laugh rather than save you from your worst nightmare. “Y/n, how many times have I talked to you about guys in a romantic sense? Has any of it ever been about Haechan? No.” She answers for you. “It’s always been about…” This time she drags off and leaves you to fill in the blanks yourself. You finally get over the horror that could have faced you and your mind clears, causing you to light up.
“Mark! Wait, Mark is coming?!” You ask excitedly, making her laugh some more.
“Yes, Mark is coming. We are really good friends, after all. I’m just thinking if he sees me all dressed up, he’ll finally realize he has to ask me on a date sooner than later or someone else will. I’m getting tired of waiting for his dorky ass.” She replies, and you raise your eyebrows - you know she would wait forever for Mark, not that she necessarily should, but she would.
The two of you arrive at the restaurant to find out you were the first ones there for the party and start on checking in for the reservation. Then, as you both turn around from the host stand, you’re greeted with Mark and Haechan walking in together. You’re sure Mark looked great, but you would be lying if you said you even took one look at him. Instead, all of your attention was on Haechan, his white button-up tightly hugging his body, the look complete with rolled-up sleeves. You did your best not to stare, but it wouldn’t have mattered anyways, he wasn’t paying any attention to you. Instead, he was now entirely engrossed in conversation with Mark and Jessica. You don’t even know if he knew you were here, and in that moment you realized tonight was going to prove a lot harder than you originally thought, because you hated Haechan an overwhelming amount. 
Thankfully, the rest of the party arrived soon after and you were all quickly seated, Jessica in the middle with you and Haechan at complete opposite ends as promised. Instead, you got to sit and talk with Winter and Jisung. Overall, you really couldn’t complain. Winter was one of the first friends you made on campus. On the other hand, you and Jisung had been partnered for a project one semester that saw the two of you sharing way too many 2:00 am coffees as you tried to squeeze the semester project into the span of two weeks - your friendship with Jisung feels more so like the result of trauma bonding, but you wouldn’t have traded it for the world. 
That being said, dinner went pretty smoothly. After eating your main course, you excused yourself to use the bathroom, but you didn’t even make it ten steps before you realized you were being trailed. As you step into the hallway where the doors to the restrooms were, you turn around to face Haechan. “Really? You couldn’t wait until I was back at the table?” You ask plainly. Haechan furrows his brows.
“I didn’t plan this. I didn’t even realize you had gotten up from the table. I wasn’t paying any attention to you.” He remarks, and you roll your eyes.
“Right, all you ever do is pretend I don’t exist. How could I forget?” You say sarcastically.
Haechan scoffs, shaking his head. “Well, all you do is hate me for existing, so I feel like it’s a pretty even balance. Besides, every time I acknowledge your existence, it ends up like this.” 
You pause for a moment, glaring at Haechan. Was it truly easier to pretend you didn’t exist rather than deal with the fact that you do. “I hate you.” You finally say. Haechan feigns surprise, moving a hand over his heart as if he’s just been shot. Though, his face neutralizes in an instant.
“I hate you, too. Can we get on with why we’re actually here now?” He asks, nodding his head towards the men’s room as he looks towards you with disinterest. You clench your jaw, not bothering to give him a verbal response as you walk into the ladies room, where you finally let yourself breathe again. 
The rest of the dinner party went by quickly, and suddenly it was just you and Jessica back in her car. “Well, that went really well!” She said, beaming. You could hardly match the enthusiasm, though.
“Yeah…”
She chanced a look over at you, eyebrows furrowed. “Did it not go really well?”
“It was fine.” You reply softly, shaking your head. You didn’t want to ruin the night now after appearing to have successfully made it through dinner.
“You two weren’t even around each other.” She says, her underlying tone letting you know how confused she was.
“We ran into each other by the bathrooms.” You say, shrugging in your seat.
Jessica grimaces. “Didn’t go well, I’m guessing.”
You let out a heavy, defeated sigh. “I don’t understand what his problem is.”
“He doesn’t have a problem.” Jessica replies with a light laugh, and you shoot your gaze over to her in question.
“Really? So, he’s just always a dick?” You ask, trying your best to keep your tone light while also letting her know that, if that’s normal Haechan, you were harshly judging her choice of friends.
Jessica smiles, a small laugh coming out that’s more so just an exhale. “No…but maybe the issue is just the fact that you hate him. Maybe if you were a little nicer to him, he would calm down, too.” She says, doing her best to be convincing, but you just shake your head.
“I don’t want to be nice to him. Not ever.” You say firmly, and surprising you, Jessica just shrugs lightly.
“Well, I tried.”
You frown, looking over at her in the driver’s seat. “Sorry…it was a really fun birthday party, though.” You say, hoping she knew that Haechan didn’t ruin your day and praying that in turn, you didn’t ruin hers.
There seemed to be no reason to worry, though, because at the mention of the actual dinner party, Jessica lit back up. “Oh, you don’t need to tell me. I had a blast, and you and Haechan took care of all your fighting off-screen. Doesn’t bother me any.” She replies with a laugh, getting you to lighten up, too. Creating cause for excitement in itself, conversation for the rest of the drive back had nothing to do with Haechan. Instead, you learned that Mark did, in fact, figure out that his window of opportunity was closing and now he and Jessica have an official date tomorrow. In other words, the two of you squealed the rest of the way home.
It was close to a week later when you next saw Haechan again. It took Mark and Jessica one date to realize that they wanted to make things official, so you ended up seeing Mark around much more often than Haechan for a little bit. Though on Friday, the familiar turn of the key in the door was heard while you and Jessica were watching Bones in the living room, and you knew your mortal enemy was making his comeback after six days. 
Jessica paused the TV and you immediately got up from the couch, bringing your empty bowl of ramen to the kitchen so you could start on cleaning it. Then, Haechan finally made his way through the front door. You don’t bother looking up to greet his presence, he never did for you anyways. However, in an instant, Jessica was off the couch and grabbed Haechan by the wrist, stopping him from sitting down. 
“You look like you’ve been crying.” She says as Haechan turns to look at her.
He shakes his head solemnly. “No, I’m fine. They just wanted me to try a new brand of contacts since my other ones got discontinued, but these irritate my eyes. I just haven’t had the chance to go back and switch brands again, and I’m not really in the mood to pay for more contacts and waste all the money I just spent on these.”
“Take them out.” She replies instantly, and Haechan lets out something of a forced laugh.
“Well that’s the thing, these are weekly contacts, and I don’t have a case or solution with me to store them…and I don’t want to buy all that just for me to possibly switch back to daily contacts again soon.”
Jessica lets his wrist drop, seemingly understanding. From the kitchen, you shake your head, not remembering when you became so invested in the first place. In an instant, you finish with your bowl and head to your room without a word. 
You lasted in your bedroom doing homework for about an hour, which, everything considered, you thought was pretty good, but then you couldn’t stand the constant noise anymore from the other side of your bedroom wall. You threw all of your things into your backpack, getting up and storming out of the room.
“Agh! I hate his guts! I’m going to the library.” You proclaim loudly as you step back out towards the living room. 
On the couch, Haechan looks over at Jessica. “She talks about me a lot, doesn’t she? I didn’t even do anything this time.” He says with a laugh, but you just glare at him.
“Grow up, not everything is about you.” You spit out before heading towards the door.
Jessica waits for you to be completely gone before she ever answers Haechan. “Ha, she’s actually talking about our neighbor on the right. Their bedrooms share a wall and he has an unrivaled sex drive. I think she was traumatized the first time she heard…it. Though now, it’s just extra noise and it irritates the hell out of her when she’s trying to study.” Haechan’s jaw drops in surprise, the corners of his mouth wavering as he tries not to laugh. Jessica shakes her head, a smile coming onto her face. “It’s a little bit funny.” She says, getting Haechan to finally break into a smile too before continuing their conversation from before you left. Though, with it being a Friday, it wasn’t too much longer before they themselves were out of the house, though their destination was the bar instead of the library.
The next few nights came and went, until suddenly it was Tuesday again, when Haechan and Jess typically grabbed dinner together. You were doing homework at the coffee table, figuring a change in scenery would help you focus - that and the fact that your neighbor on the right was having another fun night. Jessica was still getting ready in her room when Haechan walked in through the front door. From the couch, you move your gaze towards him, figuring out he’s been holding out on you when it comes to his clothes. Today, he showed up in a black t-shirt, totally normal and fine, though said shirt was tucked into blue skinny jeans, not totally normal nor fine. 
“You’re staring.” Haechan says, bringing you back to real life. You shake your head, finally meeting his disinterested eyes.
“You don’t need to wear skinny jeans ever again.” You say flatly, and Haechan just scoffs before letting a smirk cross his face.
“My girlfriend wouldn’t take kindly to you telling me what to do.” He replies, and the news of a girlfriend only shocks you for a second before you snap back.
“Girlfriend? Wow, maybe you’ll get less annoying now that you’ve found someone willing to suck your dick.” You say, your face lighting up, although your tone conveyed how little hope you actually had in that happening.
Haechan narrows his eyes at you, his smirk turning evil. “Oh, I have a long, distinguished list of willing volunteers. Have you found anyone willing to suck yours yet?”
“Very funny.” You reply monotonously. Haechan just rolls his eyes, about hitting his limit of words spoken to you for the day.
“Where’s Jess?” He asks, his typical disinterest when it comes to you now back in his tone. You shake your head before nodding it in the direction of her room, not wanting to bother with actually talking to him anymore, either.
The next week, a casual Thursday night that you and Jessica thought you had to yourselves was disrupted with a soft knock on the door, and Jessica moved from the couch to open it, promptly stepping back to let Haechan inside, and you hate the fact that his loophole to not using his front door key unless he actually had plans with Jessica was just to knock instead. He walks in normally, but Jessica grabs his forearm with raised eyebrows. “Why aren’t you wearing your glasses?” She asks, considering the conversation from a little over a week ago.
You watch from the couch as Haechan visibly gulps, dropping his head to try and cover up his saddened expression. “...she doesn’t like when I wear them.” He states, and immediately you and Jessica both know he’s talking about his girlfriend. Despite never meeting her, you hated her guts. Ever since she got with Haechan, all she’s done is be toxic. You know so, because Haechan ends up at your dorm basically every night seeking comfort from Jessica after his girlfriend spends their dates degrading him the entire time.
You immediately pop up from the couch and storm to your room, slamming the door behind you, though that was more so accidental. How Haechan’s girlfriend treated him was none of your business, and not worth you getting worked up over, but his constant need to decompress in Jessica’s presence meant you had to see him a lot more than you would have ever liked, and that’s where you started having problems. If his girlfriend was actually nice and cared about him, you probably would have never had to see him again because he’d be spending so much time with her…it was your luck that the opposite happened. 
Almost two weeks passed of seeing Haechan every single day, and you started just strictly staying in your room any time past 5:00 to try and avoid seeing him completely. Though, when the next Tuesday rolled around, you were the one to open the door in response to the firm knocks. You knew Haechan and Jess were going out to grab dinner tonight, it was a weekly thing, so you didn’t understand why he couldn’t just use his key. In an odd turn of events, the first thing Haechan says as he steps through the door frame is ‘thank you.’ You stand there in shock, and he takes it as a sign that he needed to elaborate. “Sorry, I didn’t come from my house so I don’t have my extra key to this place.” He explains, but now you’re hardly listening to his words. Instead, taking the proximity provided by neither of you leaving the doorway to study his face with a frown. 
“Are you wearing makeup?” You question with furrowed brows. Surprising you, Haechan ducked his head, and his voice was weaker than you’ve ever heard as he responded.
“She said I have too many flaws on my skin right now and it was embarrassing her.” Your eyes widen. His girlfriend. His girlfriend, the reason he’s stopped wearing glasses and apparently the reason he has foundation and concealer covering his face right now. Your jaw clenches involuntarily. This is where you draw the line.
“Fuck that.” You spit out, grabbing Haechan’s wrist and dragging him to the bathroom with you.
He glances towards your physical contact before looking back up at you with scrunched eyebrows. “Y/n, what are you doing?” He asks as you place tons of different items on the counter.
“Taking off your makeup.” You reply sternly, and his eyes go wide.
“No, you can’t. Please.” He begs, and your heart chips a little. Your hand freezes above the water tap, sighing deeply in place of turning on the sink.
“Did you want to put it on or did she make you?” You ask softly, and Haechan’s face drops once again.
“She made me...” He replies in defeat, and you immediately turn the water on, much to his dismay. “You can’t take it off! I’m seeing her again tonight for something at her sorority!” His plea falls on deaf ears as you let the water warm up and start rubbing cleanser onto his face. You finally finish with your typical skin care routine for him, taking a step away to hang the washcloth to dry and start on putting your products away.
“If you want to wear makeup, that’s fine. But don’t ever come over here in makeup she’s made you put on again, or I’ll give you a reason to need concealer.” You say offhandedly as you finish and walk out of the bathroom with Haechan in toe.
“Did you just threaten to punch me?” He asks, a scoff accompanying it.
“Of course I did. I despise you. You’re an annoying prick, but I don’t need you feeling bad about yourself for any reason other than that…especially for something like this.” 
Haechan stares at you bewildered, trying to figure out if your words just meant what he thinks they did. “Y/n-”
“Have fun getting dinner with Jessica.” You cut him off, not giving his curiosity the satisfaction of an explanation. “Don’t worry about your girlfriend after…she won’t even notice. I gotta go do homework. Jess should be ready in a minute or so.” Then you were behind your closed bedroom door, fists clenched at your sides as you let anger run through your body. It wasn’t long before you heard Jessica come out of her room and start up a conversation with Haechan, and that was when you finally let yourself relax a little. 
Haechan was the one to start intentionally avoiding you after that. You figure you probably crossed a line that enemies don’t, but you don’t regret it. You and Haechan weren’t friends anyways, so it’s not like him now avoiding you really changed anything - it just made your own efforts to avoid him even easier.
So, about a month passed of you and Haechan avoiding each other, and when that wasn’t an option, sending each other nasty glares and rude remarks. You tried not to start anything, seeing as his girlfriend was doing enough damage to his mental health in the first place, but you still couldn’t back down and let him win if he started anything. Nevertheless, it was your birthday today and you were determined to make it as great as it could be, starting with not having Haechan anywhere near your thoughts. Instead, you were more focused on the three classes you had today, almost all of your brain power going towards making up scenarios for how your conversation with your last professor would go. 
As always, Dr. Choi never let your class out early, and you’re thankful you didn’t have a class following this or you would never get the time to ask him questions after. From your seat in the middle of the lecture hall, you made your way down to where his desk was set up, completely going against traffic as the rest of the students rushed towards the exits. As your footsteps grew closer to him, he looked up from his desk, a smile flashing across his face. 
“Ah, y/n. You look…” He starts, and you freeze as you withstand his eyeing you up and down. You should’ve known better than to imagine a case where this conversation went any differently. Dr. Choi habitually let his gaze linger on you too long, even if you were in a big t-shirt and jeans, but now here you were dressed up for your birthday. “Are you here to ask for extra credit?” He continues, and you slightly cringe in disgust. You were too used to it to have a bigger reaction, and you knew that if you didn’t play it cool, he would be uncooperative anyways.
Instead, you just shake your head lightly as if nothing was out of the ordinary. “No, I was wondering if you could open up the exam again so I can see which questions I got wrong.” You reply seriously. You got a 96 on the exam in question, and you’re sure no one who gets a 96 on a quantum mechanics exam ever takes the time to care about those 4 lost points…but it almost bothered you more than if you failed. You weren’t unprepared - all that a 96 shows is that there’s something you genuinely did not know, and not being able to look at the answers after grades were posted wasn’t helping you figure out what that was.
Dr. Choi’s reply is fast, monotone…deliberate. “Depends on if you open up your legs.” 
“Dr.-” You start flatly, but he’s quick to cut you off as his eyes light with fire.
“Into roleplay, are you?” He asks with a smirk, and if you were any less used to his behavior, you would have thrown up. Instead, you roll your eyes.
“No, Dr. Choi. You have a doctorate, so I’m being respectful. Is there any use in getting you to let me see the exam again?” You ask, staring him dead in the eye. His face loses its passion as he turns stoic, though maybe you could sense his disappointment in your dismissal.
“I told you my requirements.” He says somberly, and you just nod your head.
“Great. Thank you for your time.” You reply. Your walk out of class is natural in manner, but immediately once you get outside, your shoulders fall as you drop your head into your hands. You stand like that for only a moment to regain your composure, and then start up on your walk to your dorm. You had to get over it quickly and act like nothing was wrong. You still haven’t told Jessica about this professor. He was one of the heads of the physics department, so you’ve had to deal with him all the way up to now, and you’d have to deal with him after this course. You didn’t want Jessica to get all angry if there wasn’t anything you could do about it. So instead, you place a light smile back on your face and let yourself relax, knowing the rest of your birthday consists solely of time with your best friend - no vile professors, and no Haechan.
Another week goes by without a hitch, and so on Friday, you had spent most of the evening on the couch watching Bones. You had no homework and Jessica was out on a date with Mark for the night, not planning to get back until after 11:00. So, you figured you would occupy the living room rather than be huddled inside your bedroom hiding from Haechan if he had no reason to come over anyways. Though, it was only a little after 6:00 when the door to your dorm began to open, and you instinctively roll your eyes, knowing the only person it could be. “Jessica isn’t here, and frankly I’m gonna have to talk to her about you having an extra key-” You start as he opens the door, but then you finally see the state he’s in and worry begins to overtake your annoyance. “Haechan?!” You question, his tear-stained face a completely new sight to you.
His gaze has yet to be picked up off the floor, as he stands in complete defeat, his body shaking with sobs. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know if she would be here or not, and I couldn’t take the time to text and ask.” 
You’re immediately up off the couch, though you’re still frozen in your spot a few feet away from him. “You’re scaring me. What’s wrong?” You ask, trying to make your voice sound calmer than you felt in an attempt to get at least some control of the situation.
Haechan shakes his head. “No, you’re right. I shouldn’t have barged in. I shouldn’t be here.” He states, turning around to walk right back out of the door. He’s stopped though, by your firm tone.
“Lee Donghyuck, what is wrong?” This time, your question comes out more as a demand, and it’s enough to make Haechan freeze in his spot, dropping his hand that was reaching for the door knob. 
“My dad got in a car accident. He didn’t even make it through the ambulance ride.” He says, his words cut up by his cries. Your world stops, and you just stare at him. You were already really bad at comforting people, and this was the last thing you were expecting to hear, not to mention the last person you expected to be confiding in you.
“Hyuck…” You begin, but all you can do is fumble for words you know won’t come. Haechan gives you the pleasure of cutting you off.
“I didn’t know where else to go.” He replies, now fully crying again as he brings his hands up to cover his face. His sobs only silence for a second as he registers your touch. He brings his hands down to actually get visual confirmation that you were hugging him. You were standing in your living room and hugging your worst enemy, but you couldn’t just do nothing anymore. Your face pressed into his chest, you mumble out the best response you can muster.
“Here is just fine. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, and I’m sorry Jessica isn’t home to be the one to comfort you. I’m sorry it’s me, instead. I know you probably have other friends but…I’m watching Bones if you want to join. We can watch, like, an entire season if you want, and I’ll order your favorite food. If you want. I just- don’t really want you alone right now, and I’m scared that if I kick you out, you won’t ever find your way back out of your bedroom.”
At your words, Haechan seems to settle a bit more into the hug, using one sleeve of his hoodie to dry up his tears before replying. “Bones sounds good. What season are you on?”
You pick your head back out of his chest, staring up at him with a weak smile, hoping it conveyed just how grateful you were that he accepted your offer. “Just started season four. Come on.” 
You let go from the hug and motion for Haechan to find a place on the couch while you headed for the kitchen. While Haechan had been over more than you would have ever liked, your constant avoidance of him meant you had no clue what he actually liked. Instead, you stared at the open pantry with a frown before deciding to just grab all of your favorite snacks to share in hopes that he, too, enjoyed at least one of them. 
You place them all down on the coffee table in front of the couch, but suddenly you feel too awkward to say anything. So, you just make hesitant eye contact with Haechan for a second or two before he breaks away to actually look at everything you brought over. Though, because you’re still staring, you manage to catch the faint “thank you” that left his lips as he reached for a bag of chips. Despite yourself, the corners of your mouth perk up in a soft smile as you finally move to sit down next to him on the couch…a few feet away, but next to him.
It would have been completely quiet had the show not been on. Apparently you and Haechan were still really bad at being even acquaintances. Though, with the introduction of a new character, you quickly found your in.
“God, she’s had like, two minutes of screen time and I already hate Agent Perotta.” You say with a slight laugh, trying not to let it show how nervous you were to talk to him. Instead of glaring at you or pretending your input was the last thing he needed, though, he nodded a bit, smiling.
“Thank God you said it, because I hate her, too, but as a man I feel like saying it out of the blue would be distasteful.” He replies, and before you could stop it, you let out a heavy exhale of laughter. Immediately, your hand reaches up to cover your face, but Haechan had already whipped his head towards you. “Did you just find me funny?” He questions, the smile on his face growing.
You quickly shake your head, though your face wears a matching smile. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. This conversation is about Agent Perotta.” You say, looking back at the TV.
Haechan flashes his eyebrows up for a moment before redirecting his attention back to the show as well. “Yeah, I hate that bitch.” He says flatly, getting you to nod.
“I think this is the first thing we’ve ever agreed on.” You say, letting the shock factor show in your voice.
Haechan shakes his head, smiling in disbelief. “Should’ve known it was going to be about hating someone. Pretty sure you hate everyone except Jessica. I mean, what are we at now?” He teases, beginning to count them off on his fingers. “Me, Agent Perotta, your neighbor on the right, your professor who makes sexual comments about you…”
Immediately you jump up from the couch, staring at him with the widest of eyes. “WHAT?! How do you know about that?”
You watch as Haechan just shakes his head quickly, as if his previous statement would erase like an etch-a-sketch. “Oh, sorry. He’s on my list of people I hate. Mixed them up.” He replies like it’s nothing, and you don’t know how he’s being so nonchalant about this.
“Hyuck, we don’t share that class, how do you know about that professor? I haven’t even told Jessica.” You ask again, the panic beginning to seep through your words some more. You didn’t know how he knew, you didn’t know if he was going to tell Jessica, you didn’t know if it would change the way he viewed you, you didn’t know why Haechan’s view of you mattered because it was already shit anyways…all of it made you anxious. 
Haechan hangs his head back, staring up at you from where he still sat lazily on the couch. “Please don’t worry about it. Forget I said anything.” He responds, his orders strict but his voice calm. You just shake your head once more.
“Hyuck-” You start, but this time he rolls his eyes, finally getting fed up with the conversation.
“I just wanna watch Bones! Can we make this day about me again? Hello, I’m sad and in need of a light-hearted distraction in the form of crime-solving.” He says, his volume already much louder than it just previously was. Typically, his whining would just make you want to punch him, but he was right, at least a little bit. He was the one with the bigger stressor, and while it wasn’t a competition in the first place, you did want this to be a comforting time for him, not one where you grilled him over his knowledge of your personal life.
“Agh, you’re so difficult!” You shout back, though placing yourself down on the couch again anyways.
Haechan flashes a quick smile in response. “Great! You hate me, we hate Agent Perotta, we’re back on track. Press play.” He says, moving his arms out towards the TV in a showy fashion that you hated. Though, with Agent Perotta back on screen, it did bring up another truth.
“...I hate you less than I hate her.” You say quietly, but with your focus back on Bones, you miss Haechan’s smartass smirk falling into something softer in response. Then, Bones is the only sound to fill the dorm again.
A few hours and entirely too much takeout later, the front door opens again as Jessica walks through. 
“Hey y/n, I’m home-” She starts, locking the door, but then she finally turns around to the living room and her jaw drops. “Hyuck?!”
“Hey!” You reply as though nothing were amiss. Jessica looks back and forth between you and Haechan more times than you could count, her eyebrows furrowed.
“You two are hanging out??” She questions, and Haechan just shrugs.
“I had a bad day. Needed some comfort.” He replies neutrally, but Jessica’s eyes just grow wider.
“So you decided to hang out with y/n? Who you typically can’t stand to be in a room with for more than 0.5 seconds.”
You shake your head with a small laugh. “Jessica, he came over to see if you were here.” You say, stating the obvious. It doesn’t help Jessica’s shock.
“But when he saw it was just you, he stayed?” She asks, and you’re pretty sure you saw the mania start to set in behind her eyes.
“We’ve been watching Bones.” Haechan says with a smile.
Jessica shakes her head in disbelief. “And neither of you find this strange?”
“We hate Agent Perotta.” You reply with a smirk, and suddenly a wave of clarity washes over Jessica.
“Ah, common ground. Makes more sense.” She says calmly as she starts making her way to the couch as well. “Well, mind if I join-” She starts, but then Haechan’s phone begins to ring and he’s up off the couch in an instant.
“My mom is calling. I have to go.” He says, and the sadness and worry that you had managed to kill over the past few hours reappears in his voice in no time.
“Hyuck?” Jessica questions, but he just shakes his head in dismissal.
“I have to go.” He restates, and then makes his way to the door. You watch from the couch as he starts to leave, probably to go drive to meet his mom - this late at night…driving. Panic erupts in your system.
“Haechan,” you cry out, scrambling off the couch. He whips his body back around to face you rather than the door. Without thinking, you wrap Haechan in a hug, speaking softly into his shoulder. “Be safe, okay?” 
Haechan lets out a small sigh, knowing exactly where your mind was at. Gently, he places his arms around you, as well. “I hate you less than I hate her, too.” He says softly in place of replying to your last statement. You freeze in his arms and he’s the first to let go, his phone beginning to ring again and reminding the both of you he had somewhere to be. He’s quickly out the front door, leaving you to just turn back around towards Jessica on the couch. 
“What was that?” She asks, completely confused again. You just shake your head.
“It’s really not for me to tell you. Haechan just…got really bad news today. But you’re his actual best friend, he’ll tell you as soon as he can, I’m sure. Then you can take over my role and do a much better job at comforting him or so help me God.” You reply, a small laugh accompanying the end of your sentence before you continue. “I’m gonna go get ready for bed, if you don’t mind. I hope your date with Mark went really well.” Jessica just nods from the couch, a little dumbfounded by your behavior if you had to guess, but you couldn’t bring yourself to explain any further. 
Within the following week, Haechan had told Jessica about his dad. However, he also told her another piece of news, which Jessica immediately relayed to you once she got back from hanging out with him. 
“Hey, just thought I would let you know that Haechan and his girlfriend broke up.” She says after entering your dorm. You look up at her from the kitchen table, eyes wide.
“What?!” You question with more emotion than you could have imagined, but with the situation with his dad, was this really when she had to break it off and hurt him further. Jessica doesn’t answer your question, probably because it was incredibly vague. Instead, she moves on to her actual point of telling you.
“So, he might be over even more often than before.” She says carefully, trying to gauge how pissed you were gonna be at that piece of news. You just shake your head.
“Did he say why they broke up?” You don’t know why you asked, you didn’t care, but Jessica didn’t seem to think any of it was out of the ordinary.
“No, but he’s pretty torn up about it, which sucks because we both know how horrible she was to him.” Right, regardless of what horrible timing this was because of his already sad state, his girlfriend, or ex, probably wasn’t helping anyways while they were together. You figure Haechan dodged a bullet with the relationship ending sooner rather than later. You nod in response, speaking through a sigh as the past memories and stories about his ex replayed in your mind.
“Yeah…”
Jessica seems to be doing the same, but she shakes out of it quicker than you. “I think I’m gonna take him out to the bars next weekend or something. I don’t have a lot of free time right now, but I figure he could use a night out.” She says neutrally, and you nod, letting her know you probably couldn’t come up with a better idea.
“Yeah.”
Then two weeks later, you were telling Jessica to be safe as she left for the bars with Haechan. She extended the invite, but you figured Haechan probably had enough of you trying to support and comfort him, so you just told her that you’d stay home and to call if they needed a ride back. At one in the morning, that call came, but it was from Haechan rather than Jessica, and as you pick up, you forget the entire reason they went out tonight, your mind running on autopilot once you see his name light up your phone screen.
“What do you want?” You ask, your disgust at his call hardly hidden in your voice. You immediately feel bad though when he responds and his tone is much gentler than the one you used for him.
“Hey, Jess was the one who apparently needed to unwind tonight, so I let her do all the drinking at the bar…too much, apparently. I was gonna drive her back to your place but she was concerned about ruining whatever image she thinks you have of her in your head, so instead of her getting sick at your place, I let her get sick at mine. She just got in the shower, but I gotta be honest, now that I’m home, I’m pretty exhausted. Do you think you could come grab her?” He asks, and for a moment, you smile softly. You could tell Jessica had been stressed the past few weeks, truly probably needing the night out more than Haechan, and it was comforting knowing that he didn’t drink so that he could look out for her at the bar and back home. 
You nod your head before realizing he couldn’t see it, and then you speak up, much softer than before. “Yeah, I’ll be there soon. Send me your address.” You say, then hanging up and grabbing your things to head his way.
Haechan opens the door in response to your knocking, the familiar bored expression back on his face. “You got here quicker than I thought you would…Jessica is still in the shower.” He states, as though your early presence was a huge inconvenience. You don’t pay attention to his tone, though. Your mind focuses on his clothes as you unintentionally scan his body up and down.
“Skinny jeans, huh?” You question with a straight face, meeting his eyes again as he smirks down at you.
“Well, I knew there was a high probability I’d see you tonight so I thought it would be fun to torment you-” You don’t know what came over you, but surely it wasn’t your fault. You told him not to wear skinny jeans ever again, and he did so just to spite you. Somehow, it all made him really hot, and you find yourself cutting off his words as you press your lips to his. You pull away quickly, shock covering both your faces as you simply stare at each other, eyes wide and breath heavy as you process what you just did. 
You swallow hard, trying to remedy your suddenly dry throat. Your courage to look him in the eyes diminishes within milliseconds, and you drop your face towards the floor, which seemed to irritate Haechan to no end because as soon as your gaze met the floor, he walked the one step back over to you, grabbing your jaw to the point where it almost hurt and forcing you to look his way again. Then he kissed you harshly, and you fell right in line. 
There was no romance in the kiss. Instead, something like lust had your tongues fighting for dominance with each other as your hands tried to memorize every part of Haechan’s body. The two of you moved with intensity, stumbling around the room because you couldn’t possibly stay still with the amount of passion embedded in this kiss. The first time you remember breaking away wasn’t so you could take a breath. You were fine never needing oxygen again. Instead you broke away to pull his shirt up over his head, discarding it to the side without much care. You immediately press your lips back onto his, but he’s quick to pull back this time, looking at you with a shake of his head as his eyes move back and forth between your two bodies.
“No fair!” He complains, causing you to roll your eyes before removing your own shirt to reveal your black lace bra because the universe was apparently on your side when you got dressed today. You watch his adam’s apple bob up and down as he takes you in, a heavy sigh escaping his lips. “No fair…” He whispers before rushing to close the distance between you two again, but this time, his lips don’t land on yours. Instead, they find your chest as his hands squeeze at your waist. You throw your head back in response, giving Haechan the ability to leave a trail of kisses from your chest up your neck, stopping in the middle to nip at somewhere near your collarbone before his continued exploration, and you thank God that Jessica has the shower running to cover up the moan it produced from you. He kisses up your neck and jaw before eventually finding his way to your lips again, and you waste no time getting your tongue back in his mouth. Before you know it, he’s picking you up, just to throw you right back down on the couch. Your eyes open in surprise, but then the sight of him on top of you has you unable to function. For some godforsaken reason, he’s able to read you completely, chuckling as he looks at your breathless expression. 
The sound of his laugh gets you to break out of it, and you rush to connect your lips with his again. Your hands trace up and down his bare back, your nails sending goosebumps to his entire body as they claw at certain spots. Your hands get caught in his belt loops, causing a smile to cover your face and impeding your ability to kiss him, but you couldn’t help finding humor in the fact that his skinny jeans caused all of this. You shake your head, pulling away from the kiss for a moment and making Haechan pout before he moves to suck on your neck again.
“God, you have such a slutty waist for no reason.” You spit out in feigned anger, hands resuming their roaming over his figure. Haechan pops up so his eyes could meet yours. A playful smirk on his face covering up the split second glance you got of him looking ready to devour you.
“You love my slutty waist.” He responds confidently, and while you would love to prove him wrong, you can’t bring yourself to. So, you open and close your mouth, fighting for words that would never come out, and for a moment, Haechan looks down at you with something resembling fondness written over his features, though you were positive you were making that up. He shakes his head softly with a smile before leaning back down to kiss you, and once his lips were on yours, his entire demeanor was coated with a certain roughness and desire again that had you weak.
The only thing that pulled the two of you out of your bubble was the sound of the shower turning off, and suddenly your background noise was gone, making everything feel more real. Haechan broke out of the kiss with wide eyes, rushing to get off from on top of you as he grabbed your shirts from the floor, throwing yours over to you as he fumbled to put his own shirt back on. 
“Don’t you dare tell anyone about this.” He says sternly, running a hand through his hair to get it back to somewhat normal. You rush to put your shirt back on, bounding off the couch before Jessica could walk out of the bathroom.
“I wasn’t planning on it.” You reply in kind, refusing to acknowledge the pit in your stomach that formed as Haechan gave an uninterested eyebrow flash and went to busy himself in the kitchen, preparing to act normal for whenever Jessica eventually walked out so you could take her home. 
It was only three days later when you saw Haechan again. More excited than usual for their Tuesday dinner, Jessica opened the door before Haechan could even use his key. “Hey!” She greets with a smile which he reflects right back. 
“Hey!” He replies, actually stepping into your living room. 
Jessica immediately starts talking about how she’s not even close to being ready yet but was swamped with homework and couldn’t wait for the forced study break that came with dinner, even though she had to go make herself look presentable first. Haechan nodded along, but you’re not sure he was listening at all, because even though Jessica was right in front of him, his gaze kept wandering over to you on the couch before he could noticeably snap his focus back to Jessica. You tried to stay natural, that way if Jessica actually followed his gaze over to you, she wouldn’t immediately suspect something. Though, when Jessica did finally go back to start getting ready for dinner, you jumped off the couch and dragged Haechan by the collar towards the corner of the room furthest away from hers. 
“You have to stop being so weird around me. Jessica is gonna know something happened.” You say sternly, though you kept your voice at a near whisper just in case you weren’t as far away from Jessica as you thought. Your eyebrows furrowed as you looked over Haechan. He had never been this uncool before. 
Haechan shakes his head, keeping his volume low though his words were more frantic than yours.  “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you.” You take a small step back in surprise, finally letting go of your grip on his shirt. That was probably the last thing you were expecting him to say, but you would be lying if you said it didn’t make your heart jump up in your throat. 
“So…” You start, begging for clarification on what that meant.
Haechan moves his head down so that he’s able to make better eye contact with you, so that you could see the seriousness in his gaze. “So can we maybe see each other when Jessica isn’t getting ready in the next room?” 
You swallow hard at the question. “That sounds like a lot of sneaking around.”
“It’s worth it for you.” He replies instantaneously, making you freeze again. He was saying a very right thing under what felt like the wrong context, and despite yourself, you try to remedy that.
“But- does it have to be all sneaky? I mean, couldn’t we just-” Though, that’s as far as he lets you get before he cuts you off, shaking his head with a small laugh.
“Y/n, be real. We don’t like each other. This isn’t something emotional, it’s physical. Yeah?” Right, this was your mortal enemy you were talking to. You guys didn’t like each other. An actual relationship would be the worst idea in the world, but that doesn’t take away from the fact that he looks like a dream in skinny jeans…and you’d take what you could get.
“Yeah- uh, yeah. Let’s do it.” You reply, and Haechan flashes you a killer smirk before breaking away and settling himself on the couch to wait for Jessica to get done. You don’t join him, already feeling dizzy from the conversation. Instead, you just find refuge in your bedroom until they leave, but that night didn’t end without a text from Haechan, already making plans.
You and Haechan quickly fell into routine. The first time you went over to his house under the guise of you going to study at the library, you hardly said two words to each other. Instead, Haechan opened his door to your presence and immediately pulled you inside by your arm, pushing you towards the general direction of the couch so he could get on top of you.
The next time you came over, he opened the door to see your bright smile. “Hey, Hyuck-!” You could hardly get your words out before he pulled you inside and pinned you against the now closed door. Through heavy pants in between harsh kisses, he speaks. 
“I love it when you call me that.”
You involuntarily smile a bit as you do your best to look at him with raised eyebrows. “Your name?” You ask sarcastically as he sucks on your neck.
He pops his head back up so he can look you in the eyes as he replied. “My name that the people who I care about call me.” You freeze, chills running through your entire body at his words, and in that moment, you knew you were fucked, because this was not just physical to you. Haechan was naturally flirty - a sweet talker. That wasn’t hard to deduce from his looks alone. He was hot and he knew it, which also meant he knew how to get whatever girl he wanted for the time being, but the idea of being a ‘time being’ girl of his began to make cracks in your heart. That night, you left with a spare key to his house and instructions of coming over whenever you wanted, for physical purposes, of course.  
As soon as Jessica said she was going back home for the weekend, you immediately texted Haechan to let him know, and not even five minutes after Jess closed the door to your place, you opened it back up again to Haechan’s presence. “Hey, y/n.” He says with a smile you can’t help but reflect back to him. 
“Hi, Hyuckie.” You reply bashfully. You watch as his eyes widen a bit, his smile now reaching the rest of his facial features. Without spending much time thinking about it, he leans in and gives you a quick peck on the lips before instantly retreating back and facing the floor. You laugh as you step back and actually allow him inside, figuring that kiss was probably too domestic for him to handle. 
Since the two of you hadn’t commenced this whole operation at your place before, Haechan waited for you to take the lead on deciding where he could have you. You watch his idle presence, laughing a bit, much to his confusion, before shaking your head. “Come here.” You say, nodding your head, and he’s quick to follow.
“Um, y/n?” He says as you turn into the room. “This is your bathroom.”
“I know.” You say, bending down to grab something in one of your cabinets. Haechan just stares at you bewildered, even more so when you pull out a lens case and contact solution. You smile at his expression. “Go on then. I know you still haven’t switched contacts and I know you brought your glasses with you.”
“What?” He asks with wide eyes. You shake your head fondly, placing a gentle hand on his cheek.
“Your contacts irritate your eyes. You look cute in glasses. Please take out your stupid contacts and put your glasses on.” You watch as he dismisses your words, shaking his head as his eyes glaze with fear rather than confusion. You bite on the inside of your cheek, beyond pissed that his ex turned him into this. “Hyuck, you’re the hottest person alive. I don’t care about whatever your ex-girlfriend said. I understand if you get self-conscious and want to wear your contacts out in public, but you don’t have to with me. All I want is for you to be comfortable, and I know you’re not in your contacts.” You watch as he nods his head slowly, and you leave the bathroom with a soft smile as he gets close to the mirror to start taking his contacts out. 
You sit on the couch as you wait for him to come out of the bathroom, scrolling idly on your phone. You pop your head up to meet him when you hear his footsteps cause the floor to creak. He looks small, his arms crossed, gaze aimed at the floor, and his glasses on. You smile warmly. “My pretty boy, come here.” You say, standing up with open arms, but Haechan freezes.
“What?”
You don’t know what he’s confused about until you trace back over your words, eyes going wide as you try and remedy the situation. “I- I didn’t mean to be so possessive, calling you mine and everything. I know you’re not…mine. I mean, this is purely physical. I wasn’t trying to be like- you know. It just slipped out. I’m sorry. Please come objectify me and make things normal again.”
“Y/n, you know you’re not just a body to me, right?” He asks softly, a skeptical eyebrow raised. You raise your head to look at him through narrow eyes. 
“I’m not?”
He rolls his eyes, shaking his head. “No, of course not. I didn’t mean to make you feel like that.”
“But then- but this is just physical…you don’t- I mean we don’t like each other so I don’t know how-” Your stumbling words are cut off with a kiss that you melt right into. Haechan pulls back finally with a tired expression on his face.
“You seriously talk too much. Yeah, we don’t like each other, but that doesn’t mean I act as if you’re just some body for me to use. You’re y/n, which means you’re my favorite person to hate. And you hate me back, which is great because you always look so hot when you’re pissed at me, it gets right under my skin in all the best ways. And I get the pleasure of knowing what you taste like? Do you know how big a flex that is? I mean, come on. You’re the hottest nerd around, and instead of the other nerds who probably have the biggest crush on you being the ones to kiss you like this, I’m the one who gets to know you use dragon fruit chapstick.” 
You’re able to let out a soft laugh. “You know it’s dragon fruit?” You ask in response, and Haechan raises his eyebrows, a smirk covering his lips.
“We kiss a lot.” He replies. You toss his words around visibly in your head.
“I don’t know. I don’t think we do it enough.” You say back, and Haechan just licks his lips. 
“You don’t know how badly I want to make you eat your words.” He says through his teeth, and you just throw a taunting grin his way.
“Then why don’t you?” You ask, and Haechan audibly laughs before grabbing you by the waist and crashing his lips onto yours.
You break after who knows how long when your stomach starts feeling like it’s caving in on itself. Haechan wastes no time in moving his lips from your own to your neck, guessing you probably just needed to break for air. You roll your eyes with a smile. “Hyuck.” You say monotonously, making him pop his head back up to your joyless demeanor.
“Did I do something wrong? I’m sorry. I just-”
“Hyuckie,” you laugh, and he seems to calm down a bit. “I haven’t had anything to eat yet today. I’m starving. I can’t physically kiss your pretty face anymore.”
Haechan shrugs. “Okay, let’s order a pizza.” 
You look at him, bewildered. “What- I thought- you’re not just gonna…I thought you were gonna go.”
“And why would I do that?” He questions, making you scrunch your brows down.
“Because then it would be like us hanging out while we eat. Not…this.”
Haechan laughs again. “I know. Let’s order a pizza. We’ve watched Bones on your couch before. You’re crazy if you think I’m gonna leave you so soon.” 
The shyest smile crosses your face as you reach for the phone to call the pizza place. You stare down at the number entered on the keypad - all you had to do was press the call button. Instead, you turn your gaze back over to Haechan, holding your phone out towards him. “Can you do it?” You ask shyly, and Haechan’s brows furrow.
“What?” He asks with ample confusion. You drop your head in response.
“I get really nervous when I need to order something over the phone.” You reply, your words hardly audible under your embarrassment. Haechan shakes his head, but the biggest smile comes across his face.
“You’re so fucking adorable. Give me the phone, you go get the TV ready.” He says, and you snap your gaze back up to him, a small grateful smile of your own painted across your lips as you move towards the TV. “Just a large pepperoni pizza, yeah?” Haechan continues, and you turn back to him with a nod.
“Yeah.”
You immediately turn Bones on the TV for the two of you to watch while you eat, and you’re pleasantly surprised to find a normal activity such as this didn’t feel awkward at all with him anymore. Haechan finished eating before you did, and he frowned at the space between the two of you on the couch for only a second before sliding over and wrapping an arm around your shoulder. You will your face not to blush at something as stupid as this, and you don’t even know if it worked. Regardless, there was still twenty minutes left on the episode when you finished eating, too. So, you made yourself more comfortable against his body.
Haechan started rubbing his thumb up and down your side where it had laid, incredibly too domestic for your liking. You try and shake it off pretty successfully, until his thumb moved ever so slightly to caress your covered breast. You sigh, turning to face him with a raised eyebrow. “You’re an idiot.” You say monotonously. 
He doesn’t look away from the TV, but he grins widely. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He replies. Though, his attempt to feign innocence is completely ruined when he straight up grabs your boob.
“Okay, that’s it.” You huff, switching from your position laying at his side to instead straddling him on top of your couch. Haechan looks at you as though he has no clue what you’re doing there, though his hands immediately latch onto your thighs, pulling you as close as possible to him. 
“You had enough to eat yet?” He asks with a smirk.
You give a minimal shake of your head. “I don’t know, you look pretty tasty.” You hardly get through your words before your ability to speak is taken from you. Haechan kissed you with a passion that couldn’t be rivaled, as his hands left your thighs to grab your waist, trying his best to pull you even closer to him. You knew you messed up when you started moving your lower body against his, making him break away from the kiss immediately. 
“Fuck, y/n!” He says loudly, but his grip on your waist only encourages you to speed up. As he tore his lips from yours, you moved to suck on his neck, another thing you shouldn’t have done. “No, no, no! That’s my job. Need your pretty neck.” He huffs, doing his best to remove your shirt. You let him, and then Haechan has a field day with your neck and chest as you still grind against him. Somewhere along the way, you managed to rip him from his shirt as well, your fingers lightly tracing his abs and making him go crazy. He eventually started dipping his fingers beneath the waistline of your pants. “Y/n, tell me to stop.” He breathes.
“Do I have to?” You reply in between kisses. 
“Yes, y/n. I- You don’t know how badly I need you.” 
“Show me, then.” 
Haechan pulls back from your lips, staring at you intently. “Y/n, I refuse to let this be something you regret.”
You laugh a little, shaking your head in dismissal. “I won’t. I promise.” 
Haechan looks at you as though he’s holding back his own laugh. “That sounded so certain. I would hate to be the guy that has you sure this won’t be as bad.” He replies, and you suddenly understand his interpretation of your words, causing you to duck your head, moving your attention to your hands that were currently fiddling with Haechan’s fingers.
“Oh, no. Hyuck, I’ve never…” Your words taper off, and Haechan looks at you with wide eyes.
“Oh my god, y/n. I can’t be your first. I mean, that’s a big deal, you know? You deserve-”
“Hyuck, there’s no one I trust more than you for this.” You say, cutting him off and getting him to render still. He licks his lips in contemplation, sighing heavily before he looks back up at you.
“You might end up bleeding - that’s okay. I don’t want you to worry about that or feel embarrassed at all because of it. I’ll clean you up after. If at any point you get uncomfortable, you tell me right away. I do not care what point that is, you tell me and it stops immediately, no questions asked. I will do my best to not hurt you, but you gotta tell me what feels good, okay? I’m gonna need you to be vocal and I mean it literally. I wanna make this about you, yeah? Tell me what you want and what feels good. And if you’re not 100% sure, I need you to be honest about it right now because-”
“Hyuckie.” You say gently, cutting him off. “I’m sure. You don’t have to worry.”
“Yes, I do!” He rebuttals. You just roll your eyes playfully, leaning in to give him a quick kiss before making eye contact again.
“It’s okay. Look, all you have to do is wrap your pretty fingers around my neck and we’ll be good to go.” You say plainly. Haechan looks at you in disbelief.
“A choking kink? You’re kidding me.” He says, adding on a dismissive chuckle. Though, you just raise your eyebrows at him expectantly, letting him know you were serious, and he turns slightly shy.
You watch as he sucks on his lips, eyes darting down from your own as he fights back a smile. “Like, is this good?” He asks, wrapping one of his hands around your neck lightly. His face contorts as you audibly laugh.
“Absolutely not. Come on, choke me like you hate me, Hyuck.” 
His eyes go wide as he pulls his hand from your neck. “You know, I don’t know if I want to take you to the bedroom anymore. You scare me.” He remarks playfully, but you send a pout his way and he instantly folds, picking you up from under your thighs and making his way to your bedroom. The two of you spend an ample amount of time just making out, exploring each other’s bodies. Then, with another check of assurance from Haechan and a rip of a condom packet with his teeth, he gave you a glimpse of heaven. 
Afterwards, Haechan got straight to work on his promise of helping you clean up. “Alright, beautiful, do you wanna shower?” He asks, but you don’t answer his question.
“Don’t call me that.” You say instead, watching as he furrows his brows. You sigh, dodging his eye contact. “Too domestic…” You add on, and you can hear him sigh.
“Okay, I’m sorry. I won’t call you that, but really, do you want to shower?” He asks again, and you nod. He immediately scoops you up, carrying you bridal style to the bathroom. 
“I can walk you know?” You say playfully before he sets you down on the bathroom floor.
“Yeah? Guess I need to go harder next time.” He replies with a smirk, but your playfulness falls into genuine happiness. 
“I’m glad there’s still a ‘next time’ after all this.” 
Haechan drops his shoulders, taking the opportunity provided by the fact that you were staring at the floor to look at you with a softness in his eyes. “There’s always a ‘next time’ with us.” He says, placing a gentle kiss on your forehead before moving to start up the shower for you. Standing frozen, by the time you realize you had to tell him that forehead kisses were also too domestic for you to handle, he was already out of the bathroom. 
When you walk back into your room wrapped in a towel, you’re shocked to see your bed stripped to just the mattress. You move your gaze to Haechan, a questioning look on your face. “Your sheets are in the washer right now. Do you have another set I can throw on your bed? If not, you can sleepover at mine. I’d just want to make sure we get your bedding in the dryer before we leave to go back to mine.” 
You’re quite honestly dumbfounded, and a smile takes over your face as you shake your head. “No, I don’t have another set. You didn’t have to do all this.” You say softly, but Haechan snaps his head back to you in an instant.
“Yes, I said I would. And this isn’t about me. How are you feeling?”
“Good.” You answer truthfully.
“Can I get you anything?” He continues, and you shake your head.
“No.” You reply. There was a beat of silence, and you lick your lips. “Actually…” You drag off, staring up at him to make sure he actually didn’t care about you making requests. “Could you just- can you just hold me for a second?” You ask weakly, and Haechan’s eyes widen.
“Yeah…yeah! Come here.” He says gently, and you take the few small steps right into his waiting arms. You don’t hug him back, your arms instead at your chest, holding up the towel that was still covering your body. Though, if Haechan minded, he didn’t let it show. His arms wrapped around you tightly, his embrace comforting. Then, without being able to really explain why, you began to cry in his arms. Haechan didn’t seem shocked. Instead, he just ran one hand gently up and down your back, though not letting up on his tight hold of you. 
“I’m sorry.” You say hoarsely. “I don’t know why I’m crying.” 
Haechan kisses the top of your head. “You don’t have to apologize. It’s okay. You’ve had an exhausting day. I’d rather you cry in my arms than alone.” 
You dig your head out of his chest, using one hand to wipe away the remaining tears on your face. “You can’t be this nice to me.” You say seriously, and Haechan sighs.
“Okay, no more being nice to each other…after tonight.” He says, and you find yourself nodding your head in response, getting him to relax again. “Do you still want me to hold you, or do you want to get dressed and head to mine?” He asks, truly not caring either way. 
You pull yourself out of his arms in response, facing the floor. “I’ll uh- get ready.”
The drive over to his place is quiet, with you staring out the window the entire time. Though, as soon as you walk through his front door, you find your words again. “I don’t regret it.” You say seriously. “And I won’t regret it when I wake up tomorrow. Or any time after that. I know I’m acting weird, but it’s not because of that. I promise.”
Haechan looks your way with a fond smile. “You aren’t acting weird, y/n. I put you through a lot today. I get it. Just come crawl into bed with me. I’ll hold you some more.” You don’t hesitate to give into his offer, though, you add it to the list of things that probably shouldn’t happen again if you don’t want to fall in love with Haechan. 
You ended up spending the entire next day with Haechan, under the reasoning that this would be the most time you guys would be able to spend together without Jessica getting suspicious. The two of you were walking back into your dorm Saturday night so that you could put your bed back together and hang out some more, figuring Haechan could just spend the night here and leave in the morning before Jessica gets back. That plan is instantly ruined when you open up the front door and see Jessica moving around in the kitchen. As quickly as you could, you shove Haechan back into the dorm hallway with one hand and slam the door behind you, praying he got the hint that Jessica was here and you didn’t just suddenly turn into a bitch. 
At the sound of the door slamming, Jessica shoots her gaze your way with a smile. “Hey, y/n!” 
You force your legs to start walking, moving towards the living room as if everything was normal. “Hey, Jess. I thought you weren’t supposed to be back until tomorrow afternoon.” You say, wondering why the hell she was already here. She waves an uninterested hand in the air.
“That was the plan, but I have so much homework and my parents had a brunch planned with some of their friends so there was really no reason for me to stay another night.” 
“Ah.” You reply, trying to just sneak away to your room without any more complications. You had nearly gotten away with it, but before you can step through the open door into your room, Jessica speaks up again, making you turn back to her.
“Oh, yeah. Where are your bed sheets?” She asks, curious, and you wince.
“Uh, they’re in the dryer. I washed them.” You say neutrally, but Jessica raises an eyebrow.
“You? Washed your sheets? You never wash your sheets.” She says with a laugh.
“Yeah well, you know. Just seemed like they needed washed.” You reply, trying your best to sound normal. 
“And uh- would that have anything to do with the hickies on your neck?” She asks, and you freeze on the spot, eyes wide as you make contact with her knowing expression, praying to God she didn’t know the all of it.
“Uh- yeah you know. I might’ve hooked up with someone while you were gone.” You say, fumbling through your words. You watch as Jessica lights up.
“Who?!” 
Your throat turns dry, and you start fiddling with the rings on your fingers as you find someone to pin this on. “Johnny! You know, the kid from Chicago who takes the least amount of credit hours a semester as possible so he can spend as many years at college parties as possible? Him.” You look back up to meet Jessica’s bewildered face.
“Wow.” She replies, seeming to be incredibly amazed by your ability to pull Johnny, and you can’t even begin to imagine what she would look like if you told her you actually pulled her best friend, instead. 
“Yeah, so- I’m just gonna go grab my sheets from the dryer and go to bed. I’ve had quite the weekend and we still have all of Sunday to get through.” As soon as you finish talking, you dart to where the washer and dryer were before rushing back to your bedroom and closing the door, immediately grabbing your phone to text Haechan.
Jessica is back early! I’m sorry for slamming the door in your face, but I didn’t know what else to do.
His response comes a few minutes later, finally letting you relax again. Don’t worry, I figured that was the case. I’m already back at my place…
Though you were glad he wasn’t still outside your dorm, because he definitely couldn’t come in now, your heart struggled with the idea of him already back at his house…without you. I wish we could’ve had our extra night together. I miss you, Hyuckie.
You watch as his text bubble appears and disappears. You bite on your bottom lip, opting to start putting your bed back together to keep your mind from running. After putting one corner of your fitted sheet back on, your phone dings and you instantly move to grab it and read his message. I thought we weren’t supposed to be nice to each other.
A small smile spreads across your face. He was making fun of you. You were the one who set those boundaries in the first place. You glance from your phone to your bed and immediately know how to respond. Don’t worry. I only wish you were here so you could help me make my bed like you said you would.
There’s my y/n. You read his text over and over again. Surely he just meant it in regard to your typical personality with him, the y/n he knew. Though, the more you looked at his text, the more you knew you didn’t want him to mean it in that way, you wanted him to call you his. That’s when you knew there was no way you could respond to that message. So, you continue the task of making your bed so you could go to sleep, trying to ignore how empty it felt without him. 
Two days later, you walked back in from class to see Jessica and Haechan hanging out in your living room. Your breath hitches at the sight of him, and you quickly turn around and act like you were still fiddling with the door so you could take a moment to fix a neutral expression on your face…and prepare yourself to scowl at him once you turn back around. 
“Hey, Jess. I’m home-” You start, moving to walk towards the living room. “-oh great. You’re here.” You continue with a roll of the eyes as your gaze lands on Haechan. 
His deadpan stare looks you up and down as his nose scrunches in disgust. “Yeah, cause I was told you weren’t.”
You flash your eyebrows at him, unamused. “Well, don’t worry. I won’t be bothering you.” You state as you start on your walk to your room. Haechan calls out after you.
“You already are, sweetheart.” He says condescendingly. 
“Yeah, fuck you.” You reply back, closing the door to your bedroom and giving yourself the ability to actually breathe again.
On the couch, Jessica rubs her forehead. “You know, I thought things were actually gonna get better between the two of you after you watched Bones that one day.” She says with a small, but defeated, laugh. Haechan clears his throat awkwardly. 
“Sorry to kill your spirits, but y/n and I are not meant to be friends.” He replies in kind before quickly getting the two of them back to their conversation topic from before you walked in. 
You were getting through some homework when there was a knock at your door. Assuming it was Jessica, you throw the door open, though shock courses through you when you see Haechan, instead. He leans in to give you a soft kiss before standing straight up again, as if that type of thing was normal between the two of you. “Jessica is in the bathroom.” He says softly, and you look at him with a raised eyebrow.
“That’s great, but I don’t think that gives us enough time to fuck.” You respond with a laugh, though Haechan’s brows furrow.
“What? I didn’t come here for that. I came to tell you I’m sorry for being mean to you when you came in.” 
Surprise runs over your face, but it soon drops into a gentle smile. “Don’t worry about it, Hyuck. We’re supposed to hate each other.”
He rolls his eyes. “I know, but it didn’t feel good this time.” He responds, riddled with defeat, and you can’t help yourself from getting up on your tiptoes to lightly kiss him again.
You pull back quickly, facing the ground. “Hyuckie-” That’s when the sound of the bathroom door opening fills the air, and you immediately jump to lean uninterestedly against your doorframe, arms crossed in front of your body as your face falls flat. “Homework! So, can you stop annoying me just because Jessica is gone for one second and you can’t annoy her?” 
As predicted, Jessica quickly finds her way over to the two of you, eventually coming to stand at Haechan’s side. “Can’t believe I come out of the bathroom to find you talking with y/n.” She says with genuine surprise. You make concerned eye contact with her.
“Talking? More like tormenting…” You say in response.
Jessica turns to look at Haechan, nudging him slightly. “Hyuck, I would be careful about pissing her off, now. She’s got some big men on her side that can come beat you up. I mean, she hooked up with Johnny Suh.” 
Your face becomes painted with shock. “Jessica!” You yell, causing her to put her hands up in defense.
“Look, it just came out.”
Haechan makes eye contact with you, a shit-eating grin on his face. “Hooked up with Johnny?! Really?” He responds, playing his part of not believing you pulled him exceptionally well.
You flash your eyebrows at him, doing your best to try and act all powerful now because you apparently hooked up with Johnny. “Yep! It was one hell of a first time.” You reply, and a soft smile is quick to adorn your face as you continue. “Not to mention he took…really good care of me after. You could learn something from him about how to treat women.” You add on, looking back up at him with a smirk. Almost all of Haechan’s body language could lead anyone to believe he hated you, didn’t give a damn about who you slept with, could hardly bother himself with this conversation at all, but his eyes were filled with fondness as he looked back at you. You inhale sharply, thankful when Haechan starts talking again to remind you of the environment you were in.
“Yeah? I’ll be sure to ask for lessons on how to tolerate you first.” He responds with a smirk of his own. Jessica finally gets fed up, rolling her eyes and grabbing Haechan by the arm to drag him away from you before you could argue any more. You almost instantly throw your homework back in your backpack, walking to the door to leave as you turn around to face them again. 
“I’m gonna head to the library since I obviously can’t get any work done here. I’ll be back later tonight.” You say with a smile aimed in Jessica’s direction. She threw a thumbs up your way along with a ‘be safe,’ and then you were out the door. 
You had just gotten to the library when your phone lit up with a text from Haechan.
I’ll pick you up from the library after Jess and I eat dinner.
You can’t help the laugh that escapes you, though really, you’re beyond glad he could see how much you wanted him tonight. I’d be pissed if you didn’t :) 
His response is instantaneous. Yeah, yeah. Go do your homework before I fuck you dumb <3 
Around an hour and a half later, you get a call from Haechan and you immediately stuff your laptop back into your bag before picking up the phone. “Hey, where are you sitting? I’ll come pick you up-” He starts, but you cut him off in an instant.
“Absolutely not. We cannot be seen in public together.” 
“Y/n, this isn’t some big scandal.” He replies lightly, but you shake your head, regardless of the fact that he couldn’t see it.
“You’re wrong. Everyone knows we hate each other and everyone knows Jessica is our mutual. If they see us together, it’s getting back to Jessica in an instant. Tell me where you’re parked and I’ll come to you.” A small laugh accompanies your words, even more so when Haechan pouts on the other end and you can imagine it vividly.
“Fine, but you’re never allowed to complain that chivalry is dead when you’re the one causing it.” You roll your eyes, stepping out of the library and immediately seeing his car anyways. You hang up on the phone and open his passenger door to slide into your seat. “Finish all your homework like a good girl?” He asks with a smirk and you send a glare his way.
“Shut up. I finished all but one assignment. I got a little distracted.” You drag off, and Haechan lights up.
“Oh my god, did you touch yourself in the library bathrooms?”
“No!” You reply adamantly before sinking back into the passenger seat a little. “But I would’ve if I had to wait any longer. Dinner took a long time, Hyuckie.” You add with a frown, and Haechan just shakes his head in the driver’s seat. 
“God, it is taking everything in me to not throw you in the backseat and have you right here right now.”
You roll your eyes, more than aware that you couldn’t have car sex in front of the library. Instead, you place a hand on his cheek and kiss him deeply. He didn’t complain, figuring making out with you in his front seat was enough to hold him over since he couldn’t fuck you in the back seat. You let an entire song play through the radio as you indulged in Haechan’s taste, finally pulling back with a heavy breath before you could forget your morals. “Um…Please drive now so we can go home and you can undress me. I need you.”
 Haechan tries to hide his smile as he shifts into drive and places his hands back on the wheel. “Yeah, yeah. Next stop…home.”
You stumble your way inside his front door, passionate kisses getting in the way of actually walking. The second you get inside, Haechan is sliding your shirt over your head. He keeps his kisses as consistent as possible until everything actually registers in his mind and he pulls back to look you up and down, absentmindedly licking his lips. “Y/n, goddamn.”
You look down at your chest just to laugh and fix your gaze back on him. “Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you. I did some shopping.” You say offhandedly, as though your new lingerie set wasn’t killing Haechan. He finally brings himself to look back at your face, not bothering to hide how pissed he was.
“On the couch, now.” He orders, and you just roll your eyes playfully, grabbing him by the neck of his shirt to bring him along with you. In no time flat, he’s completely on top of you, kissing what seemed to be every inch of your body. Though, the second his lips land on your neck, you remember the new boundaries you had to set. 
“Hey, you can’t leave marks on my neck anymore.” 
“Oh, but Johnny can, huh?” He teases as he props himself up to make eye contact with you. 
You roll your eyes. “He was the first guy that came to mind.”
Haechan shakes his head. “I’ll make sure you can never think about another guy again.” He says with conviction, and for a moment, you forget how to breathe.
“God, you’re so hot.” You say through an exhale, and Haechan just laughs before moving to suck and nip at your neck again. “Hyuck, that didn’t mean you could still bruise me, baby.” 
He hums against your skin, finding a way to respond without putting too much space between your two bodies. “Can’t help it. You look so pretty, all marked up as mine.” He mumbles. You sigh, running a hand gently through his hair as he works on your chest instead. 
“Hyuckie, I’m not yours.” You say softly, trying to make sure the defeat you felt while admitting that didn’t show. Haechan freezes immediately, and when he finally finds his ability to move, it’s just to press a lingering kiss on your lips.
“Just for tonight. Be mine just for tonight.” He says, though it comes out more so as a question. You let out another small sigh, shaking your head before moving to connect your lips to his again. 
“Jessica knows I don’t do any homework past 10:00.” You tell him as you break apart. Haechan takes a moment to glance at his watch, reading the time before nodding his head softly. 
“I’ll get you back by then. Don’t worry.” From then until 9:45, Haechan spent all of his time making sure you were his that night.  
It was about two months into whatever it was that you and Haechan had gotten yourselves into. You were currently sitting in the living room. You knew Haechan was fully aware that Jessica wasn’t home, so now you were just waiting for him to burst through the front door at any moment. When he finally does, he walks to put his keys and wallet down on the counter before making his way over to where you were sitting and placing a soft kiss on your lips. “Hey,” he says smoothly, causing blush to cover your face. You still weren’t used to the days where he would be more gentle with you, not that you were complaining, but it was unfamiliar nonetheless. You smile back at him, about to respond when he finally moves his gaze to assess what you’ve been up to. “Are you playing Mariokart?” He asks, and you laugh from slight embarrassment. 
“Yeah. Had to kill time while waiting for you somehow.” You say as you hit the home button to exit out, but then you notice the smallest traces of sadness cross his face, causing you to smirk. “Did you want to play?” You ask, and Haechan shoots his gaze back over to you, looking more like a boy than ever. 
“Of course I want to play!” He replies, and suddenly your laughter isn’t from embarrassment anymore. You move to grab another remote for him so the two of you could play together. You spent the next two hours playing Mariokart with him, trying to perfect all the circuits so you could collect all the best trophies, and though today’s physical touch went no further than celebratory kisses, playful shoves, and your head on his shoulder, you wouldn’t have traded it for the world. Though, it brought about a fundamental truth - you were not having passionate sex with your enemy. No, you found that you liked being around Haechan. 
The two of you had finished a quick dinner before the realization hit that Jessica would be coming back home from her night class soon. With a shared glance, you and Haechan both knew he should probably head back to his place. You reluctantly walked him to your front door, hand reaching for the knob to open it when Haechan’s hand grabbed hold of your own. You look up at him, confused, but he just stared down at you with a grin before leaning in to kiss you. “We can do this more often, too.” He says softly as he pulls back. You raise your brows in question. 
“Kiss?” You reply, trying to figure out what he was referring to. 
Haechan laughs, shaking his head and making his hair fall messily around his eyes. “No- well, yes, I always want to kiss you, but I’m talking about just hanging out. You know, playing Mariokart and all that…if you want! We don’t have to, I can just come over and immediately undress you and I wouldn’t mind that either-”
“Hyuck,” you say with a laugh, cutting him off. “We’ll hang out more, don’t worry. Besides, we still have the 200 cc circuits to beat.” 
You watch as he smiles brightly back down at you before leaning back in, this time to kiss every inch of your face and turn you into a giggling mess. “I’ll see you soon.” He says smoothly, and then he’s finally out the door and leaving you blushing profusely because you think Haechan just admitted to enjoying being around you, too. 
A couple of Fridays later, Haechan lets himself into your dorm as casually as ever when he comes over to actually hang out with Jessica. At the sound of the door closing, Jessica walks out from her room to greet Haechan, who already had his attention occupied by the new addition to your kitchen table. “Flowers? I didn’t know you could keep things alive.” He jokes as he turns around to face Jessica. She just rolls her eyes with a laugh.
“They’re not mine. Y/n bought them, and for your information, I can actually keep flowers alive way better than she can, thank you very much.” She replies, and Haechan turns back to study the bouquet again, trying to memorize them before Jessica could catch onto his actions.
“Should’ve known y/n bought them - these aren’t the prettiest flowers by a long shot.” He says with a scoff. 
Jessica shakes her head. “You should be glad she isn’t home right now to hear you say that. The bluebells in there are her favorite flower in the world.” At this, Haechan shoots his gaze back towards Jessica.
“Really?” He asks, furrowing his eyebrows after the fact to try and cover up the genuine curiosity that painted his question. Jessica seems not to notice as she just nods her head, but that’s when you finally come in through the front door, and they both turn their attention towards you.
You didn’t know Haechan was going to be at your place right now, but you probably should’ve guessed with it being a Friday - if Mark and Jessica weren’t going on a solo date, their friend group typically hung out and bar hopped all together. Regardless of the fact that Jessica was there, you couldn’t bring yourself to put on a look of disgust once you saw Haechan. Instead, you were radiating off a sort of empty feeling - you weren’t really sad, just hollow, not concerned enough to fake-hate Haechan. You don’t say a single word in greeting as you just go to your room and start getting things ready for a shower. 
Haechan turns back to Jessica with raised eyebrows. “Where did she just come from?” He asks, wondering what the hell had you looking like that. 
“Ummmm, today’s Friday, right?” Jessica asks, then looking at the time. “She just got back from quantum mechanics.” She answers, and that seems to calm her worries - she would look dead every time she had to sit through quantum mechanics, too. On the other hand, Haechan’s hands balled into fists. He knew that class was with your dick of a professor, and he could only guess as to what disgusting things he threw your way this time that had you feeling so dirty you had to shower right away. 
Haechan wanted to barge into your room, wrap you in the biggest hug, and let you cry in the comfort of his arms, but he couldn’t - not with Jessica here. With every muscle in his body tensed up, he thought about the consequences of his actions should he go wrap you in a hug anyways, but that wouldn’t be fair to you. You were a part of whatever relationship the two of you had going on, and you both agreed that relationship stayed hidden. He couldn’t ruin that now without your consent.
Instead, he just looked back at Jessica flatly, flashing his eyebrows in recognition of the answer, and then quickly moved along. “Do you wanna head out to meet up with the guys?” He asks in return, and if there was any desperation in Haechan’s voice conveying how much he needed to get out of your dorm before he cracked, Jessica didn’t pick up on it. She nodded, grabbing her things, knocking on your door to let you know they were heading out, and then following Haechan out of the dorm.
Before you knew it, six months had passed since Haechan lost his dad, and you decided to surprise him with his favorite meal. It wasn’t like the two of you weren’t planning dinners/hangouts/hookups basically every day anyways, but you still wanted this one to be more lowkey, more intimate in an emotional, rather than physical, way, and a surprise dinner would do just that. You picked up his favorite takeout for the both of you before driving over to his place, pulling out your spare key to his house with excitement overtaking you as you walked in.
“Hey, Hyuckie. I’m here with din- Oh god.” Your face, along with the bag of food in your hands, instantly drops as you turn back from the closed door to his living area, only to notice him on top of another girl…his ex. Tears immediately sting at the back of your eyes, and you’re using everything in you to not let them fall down your face.
Haechan pops up as soon as you had started speaking, his eyes wide as he turns to look at you over his shoulder, and his body still straddled over his ex. “Y/n!” He yells out in shock.
His ex moves to prop herself up on her elbows, giving her a clear view of your frozen state at the door. Then, she rolls her eyes with a laugh. “Oh, I forgot she was the one getting my sloppy seconds.”
Your brows furrow. In any case, this could have been two friends grabbing dinner together. There was no way for her to so confidently say you were hooking up with her ex without him saying so. You face Haechan with betrayal covering your entire being. “So much for not kissing and telling, huh Haechan?” You spit out before walking back out of his place and slamming the door.
When you were finally outside, that’s when you gave yourself the chance to bawl your eyes out. You knew you wouldn’t be able to drive home safely without letting yourself cry beforehand. What sucked is that it gave Haechan time to fling the front door open. “Y/n-” He starts, grabbing your wrist to stop you from walking. You do your best to face away from him entirely, yanking your wrist out of his hand and cutting him off.
“Don’t touch me, Haechan!” You choke out, and he lets go immediately, regardless of the desperation on his face.
“Look I-”
You stop him again, his voice alone sending more tears down your face. You finally turn to him, slowing your words down so your voice doesn't crack, or at least, you tried to. “How long has it been going on?”
Haechan’s face and shoulders drop in unison. “This is the first time she’s been back over since the break up.” He replies softly.
You shake your head, none of it making sense and all of it hurting you. “Why…?” You had more of a question prepared, but that was all you could get out. You watch as Haechan sighs.
“I ran into her at a darty today. She approached me and started conversation. I tried not to involve myself in it, but she laughed and told me I was stupid for not wanting to talk to her because she said no one else will ever love me. And when I went to refute, I accidentally mentioned you. And she- she laughed again, telling me that I was dumb for thinking you would ever care for me, cause you hate me. And I couldn’t think of anything to say in response. And so then we ended up here.” The more he spoke, the more enraged you became. You shake your head in disgust.
“Fuck you!”
Haechan’s eyes widened. “What-”
You make sure to maintain eye contact with him as you begin to speak, though your words were broken up by your intense sobs. “You couldn’t think of anything to say against her point?! Who was the one washing off the makeup she made you put on? Who was the one telling you that the last thing you needed to do was cover up your stupid pretty face in the first place? Who was the one with a contact lens case in their bathroom so you could take them out and wear your glasses while you were over because you’re more comfortable in them? Who was the one you came to for comfort when you lost your dad-?”
“I went over to find Jessica!” He yells, cutting you off, but you don’t take any of it.
“But you stayed when you saw it was just me! Haechan-”
“Can you stop fucking calling me that?!” He pleads, tears now running slowly down his own cheeks. 
All you can do is shake your head again sadly. “I don’t understand how you could go through all of that with her and then go back to it. Do you know how idiotic I feel?! Sneaking around and lying to Jessica because I’m hooking up with her best friend, who everyone thinks I hate, by the way, behind her back. Being so euphoric from your touch that I want to tell the world but I can’t because you told me I couldn’t tell anyone, and I wasn’t gonna break that promise because I wanted to be able to keep seeing you- would do anything to keep seeing you. Thinking that maybe there was the smallest chance any of this was real to you, too. To be so upset over something I have no right to be upset about because you were never mine.”
“Y/n-” He says as gently as he could given both your states. You lose the courage to look him in the eye, instead dropping your gaze to the floor as you respond.
“I feel like an idiot, Haechan.” With that, you turn to get back in your car and go home, and Haechan doesn’t stop you. 
You continued to cry the entire drive back home, but you managed to stop the debilitating sobs, and instead soft, insistent tears just rolled down your face. You unlock the door to your house, your voice cracking as you announce your presence.
“I’m home.”
“Y/n-” Jessica starts excitedly, but then she sees your state and instantly panics. “-are you okay?! What happened?!” She continues, running up to where you stand defeated at the entryway.
“Is everything okay?” A male voice adds, and you sigh as your cries get more intense again.
“Mark is here. Of course Mark is here. Cause you guys are together and happy.” You say in a snarky response, and out of your peripheral, you see a frowning Mark take two steps back from the hug you and Jessica were encased in.
“Y/n, what is going on?” Jessica asks, more confused than ever because you’ve never been anything but happy for her and Mark. You shake your head rapidly in response.
“Nothing. You would hate me.”
Though your face was buried in her chest, you can sense her rolling her eyes. “I can assure you, I wouldn’t.” She states plainly, and though you knew she definitely would once she actually knew what was up, you took her words for what they were worth and your explanation tumbled out of your mouth.
“I’ve been hooking up with Haechan behind your back.”
Jessica immediately pulls away from the hug, making concerned eye contact with you instead. “WHAT?!”
Mark glances between the two of you, feeling incredibly like he was intruding, even more so because Haechan was his friend, too. “I’m uh- gonna go grab food!” He interjects before dashing out of the door behind you. With him gone, you continue with your explanation.
“For months, Jess. And we agreed not to tell anyone because it was just a friends with benefits thing, or enemies with benefits I guess. But it was more to me. It was real. I love him, Jessica.” The words just tumbled out of your mouth, but they were true, you knew so the second you said it. You loved Haechan.
Jessica looks at you with a frown. “So why the tears?” She asks gently, and you immediately drop your gaze to the floor, embarrassed, ashamed.
“I went over and unlocked his door with my spare key because we were gonna have dinner together.” You say slowly, your words finally coming out more even.
“Yeah?” Jessica probes when you had seemed to stop talking completely. You swallow hard, squeezing your eyes shut to avoid more tears from falling, but then you just spit it out.
“He was with his ex. On top of her. On the couch that knows my imprint.”
Jessica’s eyes widened impossibly. “Y/n-”
“Why the fuck would he do that, Jessica?” You practically shout, your rage finally mixing in with your sorrow.
Jessica just shakes her head, sucking on her bottom lip. “I don’t know.” She replies softly, and then she just holds you in silence until your tears finally stop and you move to lock yourself in your bedroom. 
Two days later, when there’s a knock on your door, you assume Jessica is there to try and get you to eat something again. You slump over to open your bedroom door, already preparing how to tell Jessica you still couldn’t imagine stomaching food yet, when instead, it’s Haechan’s worried gaze meeting yours. Your eyes widen, stinging with tears already, but you can’t bring yourself to close the door just yet - maybe it was the fact that he was in his glasses, goddamned skinny jeans, and a bouquet of flowers in his hand. “Y/n, it was the worst mistake of my life.” He says sincerely, and you drop your gaze to the floor.
“What? Getting together with me or her?” You ask with venom.
His response is instantaneous. “With her. Obviously!”
“You sure? You sure she doesn’t love you more than I do?” You spit back angrily, daring to look him in the eyes once again just to glare at him.
The sadness in his face neutralizes in an instant, and he stares back at you with wide eyes. “You- do you- do you love me?” He asks hesitantly in response, and the tears you’d been holding back fell freely now.
“I’m not fucking putting myself through this.” You respond defeatedly, and you immediately close the door in his face, running to bundle up in bed in a mess of tears. 
When you finally step out of your room again to grab a water bottle, you’re met with the bouquet Haechan had in his hands now laying on the counter. You walk up to it, reading the sticky note now attached. 
This was the only bouquet they had with bluebells…I know they’re your favorite. Coincidentally, one of their meanings is forgiveness (according to the flower shop guy, at least). There’s nothing I want more than your forgiveness. Y/n, I messed up so bad, I know, I’m sorry. I never should have done that. I don’t know why I did that, not when you’re everything I’ve ever wanted. I’m sorry I never made you mine when I really had the chance. I was terrified you didn’t feel for me the way I do for you, but now I know how stupid that was. You’re the only one to ever care for me the way you do, and if you decide that what I did was too terrible, just know you’ll forever be my standard…my beautiful, incomparable standard.
When Jessica walked in through the front door after grabbing lunch with Mark, she found you still standing there in the kitchen, looking down on the now tear-stained note as your body still shook with sobs. 
She walked over to the counter, silently sliding the note away from where it laid in front of you to read it herself. From your right, you hear her sigh and she’s quick to put down the note and wrap you in a hug instead. You stay crying in her arms for what you felt had to be too long, but she never said a word about it if it was. 
Your days quickly started to blur, all of them feeling the same as you would drag yourself to class and then back home, with no extra plans to ever keep you occupied or active. You were currently on the couch, sweats adorning your figure, Bones on the TV, and a pint of ice cream in your hands. You had given up on trying - no longer caring about nice outfits or makeup, hardly eating anything of actual substance. As long as you had enough energy to sit through class, you considered it a win. It was after dinner time when Jessica got back from one of her dates with Mark, closing the front door to turn around and see you as her face falls. 
“Hey…how are you?” She asks lightly, walking over to where you sat in the living room.
You don’t move your gaze away from the TV, or more so, the ice cream you were eating. “Fine. Why?” You reply monotonously, and Jessica looks at you defeatedly.
“Because sweetheart, it’s been two months and you’re still devouring pints of icecream at a time on our couch.”
“I don’t like life without him.” You spit out in reply, though your voice is weak, and the more you thought about how true the statement was, the closer you got to tears. 
Jessica reaches over to brush some of your hair back from where it covered your face, making sure the two of you could make eye contact. “I know. He feels the same way, you know?”
“You’re just saying that.” You snap back instantly, but Jessica shakes her head.
“No, I’m not. I wouldn’t do that to you. Every time I go over to his place, he looks almost exactly like you do. He keeps beating himself up, saying he should’ve stuck to his plan for your birthday, that everything would’ve worked out perfectly if he knew you at least tolerated him before he indulged in your physical attractiveness.”
This finally gets your attention, and your face fills with confusion, feeling something other than sadness for the first time in two months. “Wh- what do you mean his plan for my birthday?”
Jessica seems surprised at the question. “Oh, I thought he would’ve told you. He was gonna pick you up from class and walk you back here so he could wish you a happy birthday.” 
In an instant, all of the color drains from your face again. “Why didn’t he?”
“I don’t know. He never told me.” Jessica answers seriously, now cementing the idea you had in your mind of what happened, everything clicking into place.
You finally speak again after what felt like forever of silence, your brain going 100 miles an hour. “...Do you know where he is now?” You ask seriously, and Jessica doesn’t hide her shock at your change in behavior.
“No, but I can find out. You okay?” She asks, and you just shake your head.
“No. No, not at all.” You reply, and you’re already up off the couch, rushing to put the pint of ice cream away and change into nicer clothes as Jessica texts Haechan, who just so happened to be at home…because his daily routine practically reflected yours over the past two months.
You knock harshly on his door, pacing back and forth as you wait for him to answer, nerves coursing through your entire being. After what felt like a lifetime, the door cracks open, and all of your movements pause. At first, it’s hardly open enough to see him at all, and you gulp back your awkwardness. “What do you-” He starts quietly, but he quickly recognizes you from the tiny view he allowed himself, and suddenly the door is swung wide open. “Y/n?” 
You stare up at him, heart melting at the sight. He was in a big hoodie and wearing his glasses, making the corners of your mouth perk up in a smile. Though, the smile quickly drops as you take in the rest of his features. Jessica was right, he looked as bad as you. To be fair, he was still the most attractive man alive, but he had dark circles around his eyes, and he looked as though he hadn’t seen the sun in weeks. 
You lick your lips, which were now noticeably dry, building the courage to speak as you did so. “You were gonna pick me up from class on my birthday?”
His eyes go wide as he moves his gaze away from you for the first time since he opened the door. “I-”
“Hyuck.” You cut him off, staring up at him intently and getting him to crack with a huff of breath.
“Yeah…yeah I was. Jessica said it was your birthday. And we still weren’t friends then, but I would’ve felt bad not at least wishing you a happy birthday. So I texted Jessica to see where you were and decided I would just walk you back from class. And I-” He breaks off with a faint laugh as he recalls the memory. “I put on a pair of skinny jeans beforehand because I figured even if you hated me, you found me at least a little more tolerable in skinny jeans. Then I went to go pick you up. When you didn’t come out with the rest of your class, I went inside the lecture hall to see what was up or if I just missed you somehow. That’s when I saw you talking to your professor. That’s when I heard his comments. You weren’t even in anything close to scandalous anyways. You just dressed up for your birthday. You were pretty. That was it, so I figured it wasn’t a one-off thing. How you handled it made me think it wasn’t the first time for it to happen, either. You could barely see your wince. The same couldn’t be said for me, though. I was mad, fuming. I got out of there as soon as I could so that I’d be out of sight by the time you got out. If you saw me and started a conversation, I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from bringing it up. God, I was so angry, and I figured that wasn’t what you wanted on your birthday.” He faced the ground while he spoke, but you studied his figure the entire time, your eyes finding their home as they landed on Haechan again after all this time. You hardly let him finish his last word before you speak up.
“Tell me you want to kiss me.” You say, and Haechan finally whips his head back up to face you, eyes wide in surprise. “Tell me you want to kiss me and have it mean something outside of these walls.”
“What?!” He responds, visibly thrown off. You don’t have the patience for it.
“Hyuck!” You say, and Haechan seems to come back to the moment, nodding his head rapidly.
“I do! I want to kiss you. Always.” 
The biggest of smiles overtakes your face as you press up on your tiptoes to finally lock your lips with his again. One of his hands immediately flew to your waist, while the other placed itself lightly on the side of your face, holding you as though one harsh movement would cause this moment to break, this dream to end. When you pull back for air, Haechan wastes no time. “Y/n, please be my girlfriend. Please be mine. Please let me tell the entire world that you’re mine.” He says, his intonation practically making it a beg. 
You nod your head before digging it into his chest in a tight hug. “I’m yours.” 
183 notes · View notes
azrielbrainrot · 16 hours
Text
I Laugh Like Me Again... She Laughs Like You - Part 7
Pairing: Azriel x F!Reader
Description: Azriel would give anything to hold you one more time.
Warnings: Violence, Death (well not really)
Word Count: 4600
Notes: This is the moment of truth, our girl finally gets some answers. Hope you enjoy!
Part 6
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It hasn't even been a full day since you killed Norris in that dark cell, but you've never felt better. The moment his heart stopped beating, you started breathing easier. It felt like the weight of the world fell off your shoulders, and knowing you will never have to kill or hurt someone at his orders brought you an amount of relief you never thought you would be able to feel. The days of stretching yourself thin to do his and the guild's bidding at the cost of your conscience were finally gone, you truly couldn't believe it.
You weren't so naive to think the guild would allow you to walk away so easily after not only deserting and sharing classified information about the organization, but also killing one of their best members. They would surely send out assassins to find and kill you, to silence you lest you tell the courts of Prythian too much about them - this is precisely how the guild has managed to survive in the shadows for so long after all, by disposing of any possible threat to the organization. But, with the backing of the Night Court and Azriel's endless support, you didn't feel so threatened, especially after witnessing their power and resilience while helping you with this whole situation. Rhysand has also already gotten more than enough information from Norris' mind to give you enough of an edge. Most of all, you weren't alone for the first time in your life.
The only thing that was still missing were your memories, the main part of the plan and the exact reason you were currently sitting in this foreign room while the High Lord prepared himself to enter your mind and destroy the spell keeping them locked out of your reach. You've been told this was the room you and Azriel had shared in the townhouse before you passed. An interesting choice made by the High Lady for such a somber spell to occur in, though you understand the sentiment behind her decision. With some luck, this place could act as a jumpstart to the process if needed. It would also be good for you in case regaining your memories somehow erases the recent ones.
If it were up to you, this would have happened right after Norris was killed, it could have been in that same damp and bloody cell for all you cared, but Azriel and the others insisted on waiting, letting you and Rhysand rest your bodies and minds before attempting such a delicate procedure.
Azriel also had to go and find the witch's tool Norris used, although that had taken him less than an hour since Rhysand had stolen that information directly from Norris' mind, and he had been back before you even had the chance to finish bathing. Apparently your theory that the tool had to be close to him was correct, and so your handler had hidden it not far from where your meeting had occurred. After he died, the glamour placed on it fell apart, and Azriel's shadows easily found it in the exact place Rhysand had told him it would be in.
The tool was nothing more than a simple amulet. It was easy to overlook the small ruby hanging from a delicate golden chain if it weren't for the strange, dark aura that clung to it, even Azriel's shadows seemed to recoil from it. It was hard to believe such a small object could cause so much destruction and hurt so many people.
Using the tool shouldn't prove to be too complicated for Rhysand either since he has seen Norris' memories of using it - you asked him to share these with you, but he refused, not wanting you to see that cruel male ruin your life and the state your body was in when Norris found you lying in a pool of your own blood in the forest, somehow still alive despite the wound and how long it had been, you decided to wait for your memories to come back before asking him again, the old you had to know how to convince him better - and, after dismissing the wards around your memories with its help, the rest should fall under standard daemati capabilities, which he already excelled at. Even keeping the amulet inactive and safe would be easy enough. Amren seemed to already have made preparations to keep it safe in the court, and a wicked glint in her eyes at the prospect of having such a tool in their arsenal - you really were glad they were on your side now.
The only standing problem and the reason the atmosphere in the room was so tense, was the lack of knowledge on the spell itself, and, more importantly, how dispelling it would affect you. The wards were placed in your mind a century ago, and had been active without pause for that long. Even Norris didn't seem to know the spell's full power or what ramifications could linger after it's gone from what Rhysand was able to learn in his mind. It's safe to assume that there's a big chance of your mind not being able to assimilate back, or even survive it.
You could almost feel Azriel's anxiety and fear as if they were your own, and, even if he would never ask that of you, you knew he didn't want you to go through with this. It was painfully obvious on his face - the spymaster was a lot easier to read then you would have guessed before meeting him. Azriel would rather have you like this than not at all, and you can't blame him for that as you don't know what it feels like to lose someone you love, let alone being on the verge of it happening for the second time, but that's precisely why you need to do this.
From what he has told you, you lived a full life before Norris had found you, and it doesn't feel right trying to fit back into place when you can't recall any of it, when you don't feel the same as you once did, when you don't know if you're still the same person. It would be impossible to even attempt to live a normal life with the constant reminder that a full century of your life, almost everything that you knew about yourself, had been a lie.
His hazel eyes meet yours as you shift on the mattress, impatiently waiting for Rhysand to finish his preparations. In truth, you don't think he has looked away from you for a second ever since you walked into this room, walked back into his life even.
You give him a small smile, hopefully quelling some of his nerves. He tries to return it, but you don't need your memories or the decades of knowing him to see right through it. It didn't reach his eyes, the concern so visible there it made a lump form in your throat, and his shadows were clinging to him almost desperately, trying to soothe their singer as best as they could, to no avail. You wished you knew how to comfort him, and how to let him comfort you properly in turn - yet another reason to go through with this.
“Are you ready?” Rhysand's voice makes you jump slightly and break eye contact with your husband, not even realizing you'd gotten lost in the warm hazel of his eyes once again.
“Yes,” you nod, straightening your back and placing your palms firmly on the mattress, risking one last look at Azriel before focusing on the High Lord.
“We can start then.”
You'd be lying if you said you weren't a bit nervous, scared even - your life was on the line after all, but this was your only chance of getting rid of that aching empty well inside of you, and if Azriel was convinced Rhysand was capable of doing so, then you believed him.
The High Lord was also worried though, if it wasn't obvious by the way his mate kept touching his arm and squeezing his hand, the lack of his usual obnoxious confidence would have given it away. If he failed he would not only lose his friend again, but also break his brother's heart beyond repair. You even think he'd end up blaming himself, though it didn't seem to fit in with the image you initially had of him. It's not an exaggeration to say your life is in his hands.
Feyre helps him wrap the amulet around his wrist as if it were a bracelet, squeezing his hand one more time before joining Azriel a few steps away, a conflicted look falling over her face as she watches her friend, not knowing how to comfort him. Even Amren, who stood by the door with crossed arms, looked concerned. If you weren't already more than curious enough to risk your life to regain your memories, the fact that such a creature would look worried about you would definitely make you want to remember everything just to find out exactly how that came to happen.
Rhysand walks to you then, stopping right in front of your legs dangling off the bed, close enough that your feet almost touch his shins, and lets out a soft but weary breath, looking into your eyes as if searching for any sign of doubt. When he seems to be content with what he finds in them, he reaches over and holds your head between his hands softly.
“It might help me keep grounded in your mind. Every little trick is worth a try,” he explains when he sees your confused expression, the smile he throws at you not quite reaching his purple eyes either, before closing his eyes, his magic coming to life around you.
In the next moment, you feel black talons scraping at your mental walls, prompting you to close your eyes as well and fight against every one of your instincts to allow the High Lord passage into your mind. You try to keep your thoughts as blank as possible so Rhysand can find what he's looking for more easily, like he said, every trick is worth a try.
You don't exactly know what you were expecting, but definitely not for it to happen so fast. Just as you felt a knock at what you now could distinguish as the wards keeping your memories from surfacing, they came tumbling down, an acute pain at the base of your skull making you fist the sheets under your hands, biting your lip to stop yourself from making any noise or moving too much. You didn't want to break Rhysand's concentration, or worry Azriel and the others more than necessary, you could handle it.
The pain goes as suddenly as it started, and you could feel Rhysand's presence everywhere as he searched through your mind. It was a foreign feeling, to know someone could read into your every thought. Even if he dove into a different corner of your mind, one you hadn’t agreed to, there was no way for you to stop him now, no way for you to stop him from seeing all the awful things you've done at the guild's orders, no way to stop him from showing them to Azriel if he so wished. In the midst of your spiraling thoughts, a soft caress reaches you through your mind, a reassurance - you almost forgot he could hear your fears as well.
A few moments later, you feel him come to a sudden stop, the lull barely giving you a chance to breathe before memories start rushing into your brain at an alarming speed, so much so that your head physically hurts, a lot worse than before. It's like you can feel the memories forming into your brain and pushing away the ones constructed by the spell. Some of them you were vaguely aware of as they seemed to haunt you when you slept, like dreams overwriting reality but, with every second that passes and every moment shown to you, you realize they had never been dreams to begin with.
Your mind struggles to hold onto everything, your past memories eating away at what you had believed was your life mere minutes ago. You faintly feel Rhysand's, now achingly familiar, presence leave your mind, his hands lingering a second longer, thumb caressing your cheek comfortingly before following, letting you have some privacy to assimilate the onslaught of information on your own, and then the world goes dark, senses completely overwhelmed, barely registering the feeling of your body falling back into the mattress and scarred hands holding onto you, as your mind struggles to catch up to everything.
Your feelings seem to reach you before the memories even have a chance to sink into your mind, or for you to go through them and remember everything properly. The strongest ones are easily your love for Azriel, flowing over you in suffocating waves, and the subsequent anger at yourself that follows, for abandoning him and then hurting him so much. It's like some little voice inside you that had been screaming at you, and trying to claw its way out from under your skin, trying to stop you from hurting him, was finally able to be heard.
As you rake through the memories, remembering all the happy moments you and Azriel have spent together, - every little date, every kiss, every morning night and morning spent together, - and even the saddest ones, - the fights spent yelling at each other in the rain and the make up sex right up against your front door - the guilt only gets heavier in your chest, tying itself around your heart and almost making you unable to breathe.
You stabbed your husband, the love of your life, the male you had vowed to protect and love to the end of your days. Even if you had been controlled by whatever dark magic was in your brain, you can still feel the weight of Truth Teller in your hand, could feel the faint resistance of his skin against the decisive force of your movement, could feel his blood on your hands, could feel so much blood on your hands. Gods, what have you become?
It almost feels like there's two people inside you for a few moments, trying to make sense of each other as the world collapses and re-forms itself around them. As one part of you lives through memories in the night court, the other balks at all you've done at the guild, mourns an innocence you will never be able to get back. You don't know where you begin and the assassin ends, where Azriel's wife even fits in the equation.
Trying to stay on track, and desperately hold onto something in the incessant waves of memories, real and fake, and the feelings attached to them, you try to calm yourself enough to try to remember what happened the night you died. You knew your throat had been cut with a faebane laced weapon, the scar would always be etched into your skin, but you never knew how it happened. For some reason, you never even thought of asking anyone in the guild about it, like you didn't consider it pertinent information - no doubt, a consequence of the spell Norris used on you. If you started asking questions you might have found out something you weren't supposed to.
That particular night is still somewhat hazy in your mind, likely a consequence of the trauma you experienced. There are broken memories of you talking about the mission with Azriel and the rest of the Inner Circle. You recall not feeling the least bit nervous about it as they were simple bandits that somehow had gotten lucky and managed to evade Azriel's shadows for a little while before getting caught. You remember getting a few leads on them, and splitting up to try and find something. The feeling of Azriel's lips on yours as he quickly kissed you goodbye before disappearing into his shadows is still vivid in your mind.
After that things start getting muddled. You found the bandits at some point, and, even if there were more of them than what you expected, they didn't seem particularly strong so you were holding up your own in the fight that broke out as soon as they saw you. The next thing you knew though, someone had struck you from behind, hitting the back of your head hard enough that it brought you to your knees, the same person grabbing your hair and slicing your throat the next moment, not giving you a chance to avoid it. There's a break in your memories then.
All you can remember at first is your body feeling heavy, not being able to get your limbs to obey your commands as you struggled to flip yourself over so you weren't laying face down on the mud, the cold rain falling on your skin uninterrupted. Trying to take a breath into your lungs only to find it almost impossible and extremely painful. You remember the coppery taste in your mouth distinctly, not being able to swallow or make any sound through your destroyed throat. The thought that the knife had to have been laced with something was swimming around your mind, a simple cut like that wouldn't have been hard for your fae healing to handle.
You were vaguely aware of the voices around you but couldn't make any sense of what they were saying, your heartbeat was too loud in your ears and panic was starting to set in. The only thing you were sure of at that moment was that you were going to die on that muddy floor at the hands of petty thieves, this possibility not allowing you to even try to make out what they were saying, not caring about them anymore.
Azriel always told you that you needed to work on your openings so things like this didn't happen, so you didn't get caught off guard. He was right, he usually was, not that you would have ever admitted it to his face. The thought of your husband brings tears to your unfocused eyes. You wished you could have had more time with him. He has brought you an amount of love and happiness you didn't even think possible, and all you'll give him in return is pain. You promised him you would stay by his side to the end of your days, assured him you would never leave him multiple times when his nightmares became too much to bear and old insecurities made themselves known.
You made one last prayer to the Mother. Begging for your life wasn't worth it anymore, but you still asked that Azriel could survive this, that he would forget about you and move on. You had always wanted to give him the best, had vowed to make him as happy as possible but were failing miserably like this. The news of your death would break him, you didn't even want to imagine how he would feel when he found out. Fuck, you hoped he wouldn't be the one to find your body at least.
What a cruel fate. Making him go through so much hardship and pain in his life and still take one of the few blessings he had found for himself. You've only been married for a little over a decade, such an insignificant amount of time compared to the years he had behind him, and hopefully still ahead of him. You'd never forgive the Mother for making him suffer so much.
As your thoughts quiet, you notice the lack of voices around you. Apparently the killers had just left you there, bleeding out on the cold ground, not even bothering to finish the job properly. They didn't have to, you didn't need to be a healer to know your injuries would kill you in not even another minute. Your senses were getting duller with every painful beat of your heart, you couldn't even hear the sounds of the birds coming from the forest behind you anymore, couldn't focus on your thoughts, could barely see the light of the moon and the stars shining in the dark sky. It feels fitting for you to die at night, it was as close to Azriel as you could get now, watching the same moon shining under him, the same one you had fallen in love under.
As you gaze upon the brilliant light of the moon, wishing you would have had the chance to say goodbye, a tightness settles in your chest, somehow making it pump faster, lessening the ache ever so slightly. The feeling is unlike any other, you mistakenly think it to be your body dying off before a breath is once again allowed into your lungs, easier than before. You blink a few times then, trying to search your surroundings for anyone with the limited control you had over your body, only to come up short. If anyone was healing you, there would be no reason for them to keep hiding. You've also had to be healed after an injury plenty of times, enough to know what it feels like and how effective it can be. This felt different somehow, and it didn't seem to be fully healing you as you could still feel your wound bleeding, your throat still as painful as it had been.
Azriel's familiar scent reaches you and mixes with your own. Your chest grows tight once more, body temperature somehow rising despite the cold rain and lack of blood, before an overwhelming feeling washes over you, traveling to every inch of your being as things suddenly click into place.
This was a mating bond.
Your sobs return at the realization, even more inconsolable than before, fingers digging into the bloody mud under you at the unfairness of it all. You could feel Azriel as if he was under your skin for a moment, smell him like he was standing over you, when in reality he was nowhere to be found, when you wouldn't be able to see him ever again.
Mating bonds are extremely rare and precious, most fae yearn for one chance of a love as powerful as a bond like this can bring. So why would the Mother waste it on you? Why not bind Azriel to someone who can stand by his side? Why not show it to you sooner, so you could have at least enjoyed it for a while? You've never heard of a bond forming as one person is about to die, when the other isn't even close - usually all it takes is a simple glance, the right exchange or words, rarely happening years after knowing someone.
What was the purpose of this? Why must life be so cruel? You almost want to hope it was a mistake, but the visceral reaction your body has at the thought, even in this state, doesn't allow you to. Azriel was yours, even if only for this laughable amount of time. You had a mate, one you would be able to tell your parents about when death came for you and took you to them.
Those were the thoughts swirling around your mind as you let out what would have been your last breath. Crying every tear left in your body, looking up at the moon and praying for the Mother to take the bond away, or not allow Azriel to feel it because, as much as it hurt you, you knew it would kill him to not only lose you but also lose a mate.
You had found it strange when Rhysand had told you Norris had found you alone in the forest, your body already cold, only a drop of blood still allowing you to cling onto life, but this explains it. The bond had somehow kept you alive long enough for Norris to find you, and take you to a healer at the guild like Rhysand saw. You had been long unconscious when he did, and so you didn't have any memory of any of it. You were also pretty sure the thieves might have been working for him, which explains how they had evaded Azriel's shadows for so long.
The answers regarding your death, the ones you had been aching to learn, now paled in comparison to what you had just unknowingly stumbled upon. You had a mate. You almost couldn't believe it, but the bond made itself known now that it was free from the wards' confines, shining bright deep inside you, linking you to someone through a strong but neglected bridge, still holding on after a century, and you know just where that bridge leads, shadows lurking over the other side.
You come to slowly, your mind aware of your consciousness before your body can follow. It's like you've never been this deeply asleep, the feeling of deja vu hitting you immediately. Perhaps that's why it takes you longer to realize you weren't lying down on a bed, not directly at least. There was a body under you, holding you close to him, enough so that you could hear his heartbeat as your head rested on his chest. You know it's Azriel right away, his touch and scent so unmistakable to you now, you don't know how it had been possible to ever forget it.
And the bond. You can feel it now, can feel something connecting the two of you, etched so deep into your soul that it almost feels impossible that you've been blind to it for so many years. Maybe because you've left it abandoned all this time, but you can literally feel it purr in satisfaction now, making it hard to focus on anything else.
You don't know how long you had been out for, the sun had set in the sky and everyone seemed to have left you two alone, the faint, lingering smell of Rhys' expensive cologne mixed with one scent you've only discovered recently, the only thing left behind. Gods, you can't believe both Cassian and Rhys had mates too.
Azriel had moved to lean against the headboard, sitting you across his lap, holding you close to him and resting your head against his chest as he rubbed slow circles up and down your arm soothingly. You didn't have to see him to know he had called his shadows over the both of you, keeping you safe in his arms as he waited for you to wake up, just like he always did.
Taking a deep breath, you open your eyes, not being able to restrain yourself from looking at your mate for another second. He must have been distracted or falling asleep himself because he tenses softly when you stir and rise up from his chest, hand moving up to hold your cheek adoringly the moment your eyes meet his wide, hazel ones.
You can see the questions swirling in his gaze, can almost taste the anxiety, but relief conquers every other emotion. As much as he wanted to know you were back, he was glad you had at least survived. Keeping him in suspense would be cruel of you, especially after making him wait a hundred years, you don't think you could bear another second either.
“Hello, Az,” you whisper softly, emotion tightening your throat. He lets out a sigh of relief, one that came from the depths of his soul and brings tears to his eyes. He leans his forehead against yours, stealing your breath away as a tear rolls down your cheek unattended.
“Welcome back, my love.”
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a-spes · 2 days
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| BUT YOU SHALL BE MINE - Drabble (1.006 words).
| Summary - you've lost. the final battle against the scarlett witch finally came, and you've lost. all the world's greatest heroes are dead, except you.
| Tags & warning - Scarlett witch x R, enemies, wanda is dark, everyone is dead (oops), a bit of angst with twisted comfort (don't even know if it can be called comfort honestly), description of dead bodies, mentions of blood/death/violence/heavy injuries.
| MASTERLIST — ✧ — TO SAY SOMETHING
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You made a terrible mistake when you didn't die.
Not that it was your choice, you've just had a bit of luck. That's what most people would think, but in your opinion it was more of a sentence. It was nothing more than a cruel joke from the universe, because what's a life where everyone you cherish is dead?
You won't even be able to bury them because there is no bodies to pick up. Only dust, or bits of those you love. You wouldn't even be able to tell what belong to whom — Could that be Tony's arm? Or maybe it belongs to Steve? You are not even sure it's a arm. It could be a leg, or rubble. In that state, it's difficult to say.
But maybe it's better that way. You have never been the strongest one, you would've never been able to carry all their bodies homes. Steve could've, he has a super strenght. Stark would've invented something, or perhaps paid people to help him. But you? You have nothing special. No powers, no skills above the average, nothing except your luck.
You somehow always manages to get out of impossible situations. From being able to escape Nat' when she is angry to survive deadly situations, nothing serious has ever happened to you. You've always seen that as a gift, but it turned out to be a curse.
Your second mistake was to try to get up.
Maybe if you didn't she wouldn't have noticed your presence. You knew you should've hide between two corpse, no matter how disguting that idea was, because maybe you would've escape her gaze. But you couldn't think properly, and condamned yourself the moment you moved. A faint, and painful move, which earned you what? Nothing, because you weren't even able to do more than resting of your forearms before slipping, head first into the mud.
It was painful, and humiliating, but not as much as knowning that there was nothing you could do to avenge your friends. At least, they died as heroes, trying to save humanity, and even if they failed, that's how the world is going to remember them as. They will be martyrs, and you'll be nothing. No one would remember the name of the Avengers' shadow that died squirming on the ground like a worm.
Somehow, you still had that spark in your heart, the urge to fight, but it was useless. If a whole army failed to defeat her, how could you? Maybe your body knew it because it doesn't respond to your requests anymore. You could hardly move your fingertips.
When your vision darkened, you thought it was the end of your pain. It's not that you could see anything anyway. On kilometers, there was nothing but desolation. Bodies piled up, the ones of your friends. Smoke raising in the sky, making you cought violently. And that red mist, the reason for all your woes. It was all blurred because of your tears before the world fade away.
"Ah, look at you," the woman said. That's when you realize that you didn't lose your eyes, her shoes were just blocking your view. "You're covered in blood, broken and lost, but yet ...," she chuckled before resuming her sentence, "you still think you can do something against me. How cute is that," she said, her tone dripping with false pity. Or maybe it was genuine, which only make the situation more humiliating for you.
"You are brave one though," she added, not noticing that you weren't listening. You couldn't, even if you wanted. Your mind was fuzy, and you ears were ringing due to explosions. "The last one standing ..., you should be proud, you know, not everyone can last that long against me," which is why she has been surprised when she felt an ounce of life. She thought her battle was over, that all forms of life had been exterminated for miles around, but it turned out that one hero was still standing.
Not the strongest or bravest one, but still the last one to breath. She kneels beside you, surprised that the last awakened soul resides in such a fragile-looking body. But the woman wasn't oblivious, and she could feel that there was more than that behind those pretty eyes. She wanted to believe that if the last person standing was such an innocent woman, it wasn't by chance. She saw it as a gift from the universe. At that thought, a smile spread across her face. A sweet and caring one, as comforting as the hand she is now running across your cheek. The one you're leaning on, appreciating that ounce of sweetness in your ocean of pain, not having enough energy to care about the person who's giving it to you. Her thumbs brushing your tears away, soothing you as if she wasn't the cause of your pain.
"Such a pretty face ...," she mumbled, "so much potential wrapped in that fragile body," she continued, her words slipping out of your ears until she eventually straightens up. "You know what? The realm of the dead probably won't mind if I keep one soul for myself," she conclued, considering that the small whimper that escaped your lips was an acknowledgement of her statement.
With a flick of the wrist, she envelops you in that red glow you hate so much. Slowly, your body is torn from the earth where your friends lie for the eternity. The red mist takes all the pain away, but also your chances of salvation.
"It's okay, you can rest now, my little soldier," she whispers, and those are the last words you can hear before the world disappears. The last two living creature leaving this desolate land behind in a second, as if they've never been here.
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| REQUEST GUIDELINES — ✧ — MASTERLIST — ✧ — TO SAY SOMETHING
| Tag list - @m0nsterqzzz
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dododrawsstuff · 3 days
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Ikevil OC Atlas Fowler
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Edit!!!!: the profile template was made by @natimiles
“The star that burns twice as bright, burn half as long” ~ Estella about him
“Where does your loyalty lay, little Robin?”
I'm on a trip with my family this week, so I have plenty of time to work on my OCs and catch up to the expression requests remaining
I had a lot of fun desiging him and his curse (that I took inspiration from filibusterfrog's "Umbralysis") and ended up making a ref sheet of sorts, but I'll still draw his back and some other expressions, other than his little shit smile. I still feel like I can improve him a lot, but I'm impatient and wanted to share him with you.
More about him under the cut! And as always, I'll keep tweking this post as I think of stuff to add or change. Hope you like him!
OC taglist: @olivermorningstar @keithsandwich @scummy-writes @aquagirl1978 @sh0jun @mxrmaid-poet @violettduchess @floydsteeth @lorei-writes @ikeprinces-stuff @flimflam707 (let me know if you want to be added or removed from the taglist)
I'm also tagging some people that showed interest in him on my other post, let me know if you don't want to be tagged and I'll remove you @errethebunny @bicayaya @natimiles @venulus @rou-luxe
Name: Atlas Fowler
Age: 27
Birthday: Nov 22
Height: 181 cm
Affiliation: The Circus
Hobbies: Collecting information, baking, pissing off people he doesn't like
Skills: Singing, styling hair
Likes: Chocolate chip cookies, freedom
Dislikes: Fish
Resents: Disloyalty
Weapon: Daggers
Personality: Atlas is a very charming and charismatic man, always displaying a pleasant smile, he is a natural entertainer. He is always in a good mood and is very positive, almost as if he doesn't even experience bad emotions…?
Beneath that facade he is arrogant and thinks he is untouchable, and believes his ability is a blessing, rather than a curse. The thing most valuable to him is loyalty, he despises betrayals the most.
He is smart and cunning, and is not afraid to use his ability to get information for his own benefit, though he mainly uses it on people who have been unfaithful.
Curse: Peter Pan
It makes so that Atlas’ shadow can move independently from him. He can know what his shadow experienced while apart from him, allowing him to be “at two places at the same time”, he has full control of the shadow and prefers to use his powers at night, as to not rise suspicion from others.
Atlas also discovered a peculiar characteristic of his ability, he can divide his emotions between him and his shadow, it acting almost as a storage for him. The curse manifested when he was still an infant, so he had some time to figure it out on his own.
One thing Atlas doesn't know is the fate of those afflicted by the Peter Pan’s curse, every single one of them uses their shadow as a way to get rid of "troublesome" or "useless emotions", but as they keep pouring those negative feelings, the shadow begins to gain sentience. In the end it usually kills its owner and itself in the process.
Backstory: When he was little his parents got freaked out by seeing him playing with his shadow, they thought he was cursed, or possessed but nothing they did cured him. What broke the camel's back for them was when Atlas told them the culprit of a series of murders in the neighborhood and days later the police caught them, when his parents asked how he knew, he explained that his shadow had seen it and told him.
Not too long after that they tried to get rid of him, but the church nor the orphanage wanted to accept him, since his complicated background preceded him. Until they found an itinerary circus, they lied and abandoned him there. Most of the crew were kind and welcoming to him, especially Estella, the magician, she became a mother figure for him and the reason he decided to follow her steps and become a magician.
Random headcanons:
He learned to style hair from Estella, she says that presentation is everything for a magician
After every presentation, the circus crew gets together to bake chocolate chip cookies
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heavenlyraindrops · 2 days
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♱Father Forgive Me (For I have Sinned) ~Chapter Nineteen♱
Lucifer Morningstar x Angel!Reader Fandom: Hazbin Hotel Chapter Nineteen Warnings: profanity Visit the first tag on this post to see all other chapters.
♱ In which the purest soul in Heaven falls from grace… for the Devil. ♱
[Chapter Nineteen]
“I don’t get why we can’t go to her.” 
Charlie’s hands curled into rigid fists, eyes glued to the TV as Vaggie rubbed her shoulder soothingly. 
“The Vees have her now, Charlie,” Vaggie said. “We can’t just barge over to three of some of the most powerful overlords and demand them to hand over what they probably think is their property now.”
“[name] isnt property,” Charlie seethed, then thrust a hand to Lucifer who was sitting next to her, stiff and eyes trained on the screen just like she was two seconds ago. Completely silent. “And we have me, and Dad. We’re royalty, for fuck’s sake.” She clawed at her hair. “Why can’t we just order them to-“
“We can’t risk making the hotel a target, Char,” Vaggie said tiredly. She pulled her hand away, placing it on her chest as she looked at her girlfriend imploringly. “Believe me, I want to-“ her voice cracked. She looked away. “I want to help her too. She was-“ She kept my secret. She was nice to me- they all saw me as a traitor, she probably did too, but she was still-
“[name]? The angel you guys were talking about from when you went to visit Heaven, right, toots?” Angel Dust slunk over to where the three were crowded, slipping in between Charlie and Lucifer onto the couch. His face fell when he looked at the TV. “…Val has her. Oh.”
“She’s [name],” Lucifer said bitterly. Everyone looked at him. “She’ll be- she’ll be fine.” He looked like he was trying to convince himself, face paler than it usually was. 
“Did you know her, Dad?” Charlie didn’t have the patience to sound gentle. The words she threw at him were accusing. “You know her, don’t you?”
“Why would she fall?” Angel Dust asked, ignoring Charlie and Lucifer. “What’d she do?”
“How would you know if she’ll be fine if you don’t know her?” Charlie said, ignoring Angel. “You can’t make that judgement if you don’t-“
“Maybe Heaven found out she supported us?” Vaggie wondered. “Though that’s not really a reason to kick her out.” She chewed her nails. “This doesn’t make sense. The Seraphim loved her.” She looked at Charlie. “You saw it too.”
“All I’m saying is,” Lucifer said, strained, “She’s an angel amongst sinners. Of course she’s ten times more powerful than the rest of Hell, especially the Vees. That’s how all otherworldly beings were created- angels more powerful than sinners, by a long shot.” 
“But an angel died-“
“That was an exorcist. She isn’t an exorcist.”
“How would you know?” Charlie challenged, digging into the cracks to see if her father would slip up.
“It’s quite clear she isn’t an exorcist,” he hissed. Charlie’s face fell. He sucked in a deep breath, smoothing back his hair. “I’m sorry, I just- I’m sorry.” Charlie smiled weakly. 
“It’s fine if she meant something to you,” she said softly. Everyone looked at Lucifer, who didn’t say anything, just looked back at the news flashing on the screen quickly. 
“We could just bust her out,” he murmured, and by the muscle twitching in his jaw anyone looking close enough would have known he was aching too. The simple thought of you in Hell, yet unable to find your way to him- he swallowed and tried to calm his breathing, the way his heart beat in his throat painful. 
“About that…” Angel Dust spoke up, then trailed off. Everyone looked at him. He looked sick.
“Angel?” Charlie prompted gently. He took in a shaky breath, then looked away. 
“Never mind, I- it’s fine.”
“Valentino would hurt him,” Husk said gruffly. All eyes fell on him as he came over, half-empty bottle clutched in his hand as he took another swig from it. “If he can’t take it out on us, he’ll take it out on him.”
Angel pressed his lips together in a shy yet grateful smile. Husk smiled back at him. 
“Angel, maybe we could use you to get [name] back?” Charlie suggested excitedly, but Angel Dust began looking even more sick than before. 
“Charlie, no,” Vaggie hissed. Charlie fell back, face guilty.
“Oh, right. I’m- I’m sorry.”
Angel groaned, putting his head in his hands. “I’m sorry, guys. Fuck, I’m useless.” His phone pinged. He pulled it out, expression worsening. “It’s Val. I’m sorry, guys,” he repeated, pocketing the device and waving remorsefully. “If I see or hear anything about [name], I’ll tell you guys when I get back.”
“Thank you, Angel,” Vaggie sighed, giving him a reassuring smile. He didn’t have the heart in it to return the expression, just slipping out the door, unable to meet anyone’s eyes. 
Charlie stared at the ground, face riddled with guilt. Lucifer looked up. There were tears in her eyes.
“Char?” He asked, scooting over to her and placing both his hands on her shoulders. “What’s wrong?”
“What’s wrong?” Charlie repeated. She looked up. Her eyes were glistening. “What’s wrong? This is what’s wrong!” She flung her hand at the television. “[name]’s in Hell, Dad. And yeah, I barely knew her, but I don’t wish this on her.” She tried to take in a shaky breath, instead failing as a sob racked her shoulders. Tears streamed down her face. “I can’t help thinking- what if I did something while I was in Heaven?” She sank back down and put her head in her hands. “What if I’m the reason she’s down here?”
Lucifer’s throat clenched up. “You’re not,” he whispered. He guided Charlie up, cupping her face in his hands and thumbing away a tear. “You’re not the reason, Charlie.” He smiled weakly, trying not to cry too. “Believe me.”
Charlie looked at him, and some sort of understanding flowed between them because she immediately hugged him, fiercely, afterwards.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered.
Lucifer laughed miserably. “What for?” She didn’t reply, just hugged him tighter. 
“We can see what Angel says, then we can wait till morning, a few hours after he comes back, to see if she turns up. If not, we’ll take some action-“
“I’m afraid that won’t be necessary, dear.”
Vaggie almost leapt a foot into the air. “AAH, FUCK!” She whirled around, fist raised, but once seeing who it was she slowly lowered it, yet didn’t uncurl her palm entirely. “What the fuck, Alastor?”
Alastor ignored her, adjusting his bow tie, then his monocle as he smiled widely. His eyes fixed onto Lucifer, who scowled. 
“It seems to be a matter of fact that I met our elusive little angel. In cannibal town, no less. It appears she’s managed to escape the clutches of the Vees.” His lip curled distastefully at the last word, yet his grin never disappeared, his eyes narrowing. “We had quite an… interesting conversation.”
Charlie shot up, and Lucifer had to take all his self-restraint to not grab Alastor by the shoulders and shake every detail out of him. 
“You saw her?” Charlie said breathlessly, eyes widening. 
“You spoke to her?” Lucifer snapped, eyes narrowing. Alastor’s grin widened beyond what was humane as he tilted his head, eyes glinting.
“Indeed. And you’re all in for quite the surprise.”
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charliedawn · 2 days
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Hello i really like your fanfics about the slashers and I have a request as to what if the nurse one day walks in with a baby in her hands and the slashers think it's hers but not knowing she was just babysitting
(If you do not want to do this request I understand I was hesitant when I wanted to ask this😭)
Warning: Reckless babysitting involved
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Freddy: "That thing yours ?"
Freddy is cash.
He ain’t gonna beat around the bush.
The moment he sees a baby in the hospital, he’ll ask himself two things: first, who shagged and brought that thing to life. And two, why is it looking at him like its gonna suck his nonexistent soul out of his body ?
And since there aren’t that many women in the hospital and you were the one holding the baby, he would automatically assume that the pink fleshy thing is yours. He would then be relieved to find out that it wasn’t yours. (Not because he doesn’t think you would be a great parent, but because he kinda sees you as the mama bear of the asylum and could get jealous of not receiving enough attention.)
Freddy *proceeds to carry the baby and puts shades on him and moves its little arms to make it dance on the table*
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The baby *stares at Michael*
Michael *stares back*
Michael didn’t really care who’s baby it was. He just stared at it. It was such a funny thing to find in an asylum and he just kept staring at it. But then, he thought about who would be irresponsible enough to leave a baby unattended in an asylum with cannibal clowns ? He hence took it upon himself to take the baby and protect it until the mother or caretaker would arrive…
The baby will be safe if given to Michael.
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"Oh ! Nursy laid a child overnight ! Didn’t know your species could do that !" Penny joked as he found the baby.
He did have the craving to take a bite at first, but then he realised the baby was under your care. And as he does respect you to an extent, he decided to spare the child. Besides, the child wasn’t ripe enough for him…It wouldn’t be as nutritious as it would be if it were 4 or 5. He would hence say that he would wait until it is older. He would however observe it and smile at it or do funny faces at it when you’re not looking. He would also throw it in the air (giving you a small heart attack in the process) and giggle as he managed to successfully catch it each time.
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The baby *crying his lungs out*
Pennywise: "Give it here."
You *suspicious* : "Why ?"
Pennywise : "Do you want it to sleep ? Give it."
You then witnessed Pennywise use his powers to sing the baby to sleep. Pennywise would lull the child to sleep by singing him a song. Pennywise is older than Penny and has hence a greater repertoire and remembers…everything. He would find a song to make the baby sleep and be extra gentle with it. Unlike Penny, Pennywise is much wiser and careful. He understands the fragility of a baby and would know best what to do with it, even more since Pennywise used to have 7 siblings growing up when he was still human. But, do not leave the kid unattended for too long with Pennywise because after all…old habits die hard and unlike Penny, Pennywise isn’t fussy about the food he eats.
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"…Ew."
Patrick Bateman is NOT a baby person, he isn’t a person person on a regular basis, but babies ? They are the worse in his book.
Loud, dirty and can’t do business.
What are they even for ?
The only baby he would get along with would be boss baby. But since he is a character in a cartoon, they would never meet. So the very real baby will stay FAR away from him and he wouldn’t even touch it. He would mildly be interested if the baby is yours, but not a lot more…
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You: "Jack. You were a father, right ?"
Jack: "Yeah. Why are you asking ?"
You *dump the baby in his arms*: "Here. I’ll be back in 5."
Jack *momentarily stunned and then calling after you.*: "Hey hey ! No ! Nurse Y/N ! Come back here !"
Jack finally sat down on a chair while the baby was just chilling in his arms and staring at him.
Jack *looks down at the baby and huffs* : "What are you looking at ?"
Him and the baby proceeded to chill all afternoon.
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You *forgot the baby in a room*
The baby *chilling on a table and about to roll off said table*
Bo *uses his unexpectedly big brother superpowers and catches it before it falls and then looks down at it…wondering what the hell he just did and why*
The baby *giving him the most baby smile ever*
Him *smirks* : "Well…Ain’t you an absolute sunshine, huh lil’ ugly ?"
Also him *carries the baby to the garage* : "Don’t worry, uncle Bo’s gonna take good care of ya. Lemme show ya how to fix a car now."
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Brahms would be happy to take care of it, but he would be clueless and would be afraid to hurt it. Brahms is strong and sometimes he doesn’t even realise how strong. He could involuntarily crush the child. So, he would just sit in front of it and be on guard duty. He would make sure no danger gets near the child and keep an eye on it until you are back. He would then ask if the baby could come back when it is a little older so they can become friends and play tag together.
Brahms *making puppy eyes at you and keeps asking when is the baby going to come back*
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nikachansstuff · 2 days
Text
5 minutes to clarify a common misconception
I see that it’s a common misconception to believe Elriels want Elain and Azriel to be mates, and that this belief just validades the importance of Elain’s mating bond with Lucien. Moreover, I see people stating that we are contradicting ourselves by wanting Elriel to be mates, since we want Elain to reject a mating bond.
And to be fair, the criticism makes sense. If it was true.
So I want to clarify this. I can only speak for myself, as a Elriel, of course, but I have a feeling this understanding is common among us.
Speculating about the possibility of Elain and Azriel being true mates has nothing to do with the belief that they are endgame. Let me explain: I believe this couple is endgame because of all development in text. Regardless of mating bond or not.
What cause us to speculate on it is the fact that Azriel’s behavior towards Elain is of a mate, supported by the way SJM writes her males and endgame couples. The urge to protect, the instinct, the fact he can read Elain’s emotion without his powers, the rage and fear for her safety. I’m not even going to enter in details about Azriel being the one figuring it out what Elain’s power was, what she needed. All this factors together, plus the examples we have in SJM multiverse, points towards true mates.
Please note that we are not working with a conclusion “Elriel are mates” first and then searching the text for evidences to support it. Here the opposite is happening, because of the canon evidence and the way SJM writes mates, it’s consequential to speculate. In a way, I can even draw a parallel with a common argument Gwynriels have about the spark and singing being a writing device that indicate mates.
Now, there’s another possibility that I don’t see being discussed here in the fandom.
It could be that all this mate behavior is just the way SJM writes romance. That’s how she has done it for more than a decade, she is used to the language she created to symbolize male interest, and now it’s just part of her romantic style. Could be that SJM doesn’t know how to write romance without her males showing this type of behavior, regardless of mating bond. That’s also a possibility. But it still wouldn’t explain Lucien’s apathy towards Elain, but this is a different discussion.
Do I need Elriel to be mates? Do I ship them because I think they are mates? No. I ship them because they canonically want to be together.
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Can I request John Constantine fic where the reader is a eldritch or an angel that's known the league for a while or they capture them but John knows them.
I'm a literal whore for that man 👹
John Constantine x Angel male reader
Headcanons
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Reader’s bit of a black sheep amongst angels, cuz I feel like Constantine would go great with a bit of a rebel.
its honestly taken me too long to realize that lucifer from the show is the same lucifer as in the DC comics.
You had a bit of a past with John Constantine, with you being a bit of a rulebreaker amongst the angels and all. I mean, you still went to visit your brother Lucifer on the regular, even if you had been told not to.
Michael had scolded you more times than you could count, telling you not to pop in and out of hell as you please just because you want too, or to not just teleport to earth willy-nilly when Lucifer relocated there for a while.
It was at Lucifers club that you met Constantine for the first time. You didn’t really speak to him, but you did see how he seemed to truly get on your older brothers’ nerves, so you already liked him for that alone.
After the blonde Brit left, Lucifer would give you the whole spiel about him, complaining about how many times he had sold his soul, and all the trouble his actions caused in hell, and how much paperwork the blonde gave him.
After that you bump into him in other places. You like to party, you like to fight, you like to be a nuisance. And its not like anybody can stop an angel as powerful as yourself if they wanted. They’re lucky you just like to be annoying by nature and that you aren’t actually evil.
It ends up with you getting mixed up in some of the things Constantine get up too, even if its by accident because you were in the wrong place at the wrong time. You always just know that Michael is gonna be on your neck when you get back to heaven after each time, but hanging out with John is worth it.
Hes tried to get you drunk so many times, but it never works no matter what kind of stuff he pulls out of his coat. Being angelic doesn’t really allow you to be weakened by something as small as alcohol. But its fun to see him try anyways.
In the eyes of your siblings, even Lucifer, Constantine is a bad influence, and they’ll scold you for spending so much time with a mortal, especially someone as twisted on the ledgers as Constantine. You just always shrug, flutter your wings, and fly off to do whatever it is you do. Being the youngest has its perks, since it means you get away with quite a lot.
It was also this carefree attitude that got you caught and locked up by the league. They hadn’t dealt with many angels before, so in the beginning they think you are something else. Be It a mutant or a spirit.
You could easily escape if you wanted too. Something as weak as a man-made structure wasn’t gonna hold you, but you had been bored for weeks now, so why not see what happens. You do get pretty annoyed when they talk about you like you cant hear them. They don’t know you can hear them, but still.
Zatanna easily spots that you are of divine descent, but just how far up in the hierarchy you are is a bit lost to her, since they still believe you can be captured by human means. This is why they’re forced to call in Constantine, since hes the only one they know who regularly interacts with an angel.
The Brit has a good laugh when he sees you sitting on the floor in a cell pouting, your wings wrapped around you like a cocoon. At this point you just phase out of the cell to flick Constantine in the temple for laughing at you.
John is the one that has to explain that you could have escaped the entire time if you wanted, you were just a dick that got bored easily. The dick comment makes you huff and smack him with your wing.
After all that is cleared up, the two of you go out to drink like usual. I could imagine the league trying to figure out if you’d be willing to help them when times are tough, but to their dismay you just shrug and give a “if I feel like it”.
Constantine will later explain to them in passing, mainly to roast you, that you are the youngest, which means that you aren’t used to real work and can just do whatever you want, cuz all your older siblings baby you.
His chair disappears from right under him for that comment, so the league takes it with a grain of salt. In the end you help out if there really is no other way, since angels shouldn’t interfere with minor issues.
Most of the time on earth you spend with John though, since he matches your wavelength and isn’t freaked out by the whole angel thing.
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eydi-andrius · 3 days
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Yayyyy... I love you 😭💗... you accepted my request 😭💗 I love your stories sooooooo muchhhhhhh 😭💗 (I'm a writer too btw)
HEART GOT TEETH (Gojo Satoru x Reader)
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Synopsis: How does it feel to be hunted?
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a/n: I'm so sorry it took a long while for this. I was just not confident enough but i hope you will enjoy this one. I am still experimenting with the professor Gojo one still, on which you first requested, but this story was born from writing that. I kind of think you'd love to read this. Enjoy!
WARNINGS: 18+, MINORS DNI, NON-CON, DARK GOJO, DARK! READER, bullying, stalking, obsession, violence, kidnapping, sexual assault, illegal filming or recording of sexual intercourse, DARK SMUT, blackmailing and let me know if I forgot any tags
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Gojo is used to being the smartest on campus. Not until late in semester, a transferee was given the opportunity to move due to her academic achievements.
He hated her.
He picked up on everything she does. Detest the way she strides with confidence, unbothered, and powerful.
Of course…..She's not as smart as him. But somehow, people liked her better.
Not that he cared.
Professors who are usually tight lipped whenever he debates them, are very kind and nice to her. They seemed approachable and open whenever she conversed with them.
Classmates who scurry away whenever he is around, greets her with a smile whenever she passes by them. She even earned the nickname “sunshine” because a gloomy room will light up when she’s around.
It was an anomaly. She doesn't belong here. Your existence is unwanted. He dislikes how an outsider such as you was able to get the attention away from him so easily.
His hatred started off with a normal rolling of eyes when he caught sight of you. Bad mouthing you the moment anyone uttered your name. Embarrassing you in front of the class if you show a teeny tiny mistake. However, none of those work and weirdly enough, you still smile at him purely.
That attitude angered him more.
It didn’t even occur to him, that his hatred heightened and it turned into a full-blown obsession, that stalking you became a habit.
He is checking your socials for any updates, your shares and stories religiously. His ears will perk up if other people mention your name, and he will immediately tune in to whatever they were talking about— especially, if related to you. He will even check in the campus portal or the google drives related to your files just to judge whatever you passed to the professor.
Geto Suguru, his best friend, obviously noticed the change in his behavior but he was glad that he didn't comment further about it.
Sometimes, he knows Geto will deliberately mention your name and where you are currently. He would respond with a grumble and scrunched up nose, berating his friend for uttering a witch’s name. Yet, he will catch himself standing in the area that was mentioned. And he feels alive, when he purposely bumps to your shoulder, almost toppling you backward, and you would profusely apologize for being clumsy, bowing repeatedly in shame.
It didn't even occur to him that what he was doing was wrong. Harassing a girl for absolutely just existing seems like a problem to himself and not something she should apologize for.
One day, luck must've on his side. He was getting paranoid because he has a feeling that you’ll get higher grades than him this semester. The knock on his door startled him, especially when he opened the door and it was your face that popped up on the other side.
It seems like your laptop is having an issue. You tried everything you can find online but nothing fixes it. You came to his dorm because Geto recommended and assured you that Gojo can fix it for you.
Cursing his bff, he almost turned down your request…… when an idea flashed on his head. His ire vanished, and an evil, unfair plan formed in his mind.
He could use this opportunity to spy on you. He can check your grade and track your whereabouts and see what you're up to — to make sure you are not sabotaging him, of course.
And that he did.
You were all smiles, grateful and happy, when your laptop came back, fixed and working better than before. He watched as your eyes glinted, almost tearing up, when he reassured you that he doesn't need no fee.
He let you go on your merry way without knowing that he got you. He now has access to your laptop and everything inside of it.
—-
Gojo could have sworn that he heard his skull crack from that strong hit he received on his head, while he was standing outside waiting for Geto.
He received a text from him to sneak out and do something more worthwhile, than faking smiles, and joining the retreat for the seniors.
Although he doesn't want to go out, he’d rather do something else than be surrounded by morons, to whom the only advantage they have is being born earlier.
He was minding his own business. Patiently waiting, when a hardwood suddenly came out of nowhere, and made contact on his head. His ears rang, vision blurry, he was feeling dizzy, and saw footsteps coming his way, before he completely lost consciousness.
With a throbbing head, and a body sore, he felt like the pain was killing him. Slowly, he opened his eyes, and saw himself in some sort of a shed made out of bamboo.
He tried to open his mouth, to scream or ask for help but he was far too dizzy and weak to voice out his concern. He winces when he tries moving his head, looking for a comfortable position, the throbbing got worse, and he tried to lift his hand to assist on his head, when he realized that he can't move his hands, and it was tied behind the chair he was sitting at.
After a moment, he tried his voice again, he could only croak syllables, and grit his teeth when he felt how dry and parched his throat was.
Closing his eyes, and with the pain all over his body he did not notice when the door opened, and he jolted when someone sat on his lap, pinching his chin to look up. Forcefully opening his mouth, by grabbing his cheeks.
A bottle of iced cold water was given to his mouth. He felt the invasive cool liquid run down his dry throat, and coughs when the person who forced him to drink does not care if he could drown by titling the bottle without stopping or resting, for him to be able to drink it all at his own pace.
He forcefully moved his face away on the stranger's hold, and was looking down and coughing, when he felt the person on his lap uttered “good boy” deregatoridly while slapping his cheek loudly.
He looked up, and all colors went out of his face for a second when realized who the person in front of him was.
Your furious eyes were tuned on him, even with a playful smirk gracing your lips, it couldn't erase your pulsating anger.
His initial shock soon turned into boiling anger, when he understood that the most likely suspect of his kidnapping was no other than you.
He started screaming profanities, calling you a bitch, and derogatory names, as he tried to forcefully remove his bindings.
Instead of being offended by his words you only chuckled at him. This only made him angrier.
“You bitch! Even if you kill me right now, you will never become the Summa cum laude! You’re too stupid for that!” His insulting words slowly turned sharply and deadlier, and he thought his words finally got under your skin after he watched as your eyes widened in surprise, mouth agape, slowly blinking at him. It looks like you were shell shocked from what he had said.
He smirked at that, feeling like he was winning, at least before you smiled and started laughing hysterically, which stilled and confused him.
“HAHAHA! So sorry for laughing at that.” She apologized, using her finger to stop her tears of delight.
“Damn, Satoru. You are all tied up. Helpless and all on my mercy, and the only thing you could come up with, the reason why I am doing this, was me envying you for getting something you deserve because you are smarter than me? I am not that petty.” You clarified after a big sigh.
She looks amused as she watches his brows furrowed, eyes filled with confusion, as he tries to understand what exactly he did to be treated like this.
“Fine. Fine! I’ll spill.” You said, raising your hands up in surrender. You purposely grind on his crotch, hard. Making him wince in pain from the friction. You felt his dick hardened a little, poking you, and you jeered in disgust at that. All men truly are the same.
“Tell me, Satoru. What did you put in my laptop?” You said in a sing-song tune. As if caught red handed, his eyes widened, and his mouth closed and opened up, trying to come up with something.
“Nah! You don't have to answer that. I already know that it was you who put spyware on it. You disgusting, motherfucker. If you wanted to get someone's pussy, you could always just yell on campus, and the girls would flock in front of you, like starving hyenas. They will serve themselves for you to eat them whole. You don't even need to pay them.” Scratching your scalp, in annoyance, you continued.
“Did you know that almost put my sister in danger? I thought my abusive fucking father finally caught up with my younger sister and he planted those spywares, to spy on us. Thank God! I was smart enough to realize that the possibility of that was low, especially, since he is too stupid to think that way. And there is no other person in my life that could have done that, except you, who fixed my laptop for free. Like why are you so obsessed with me?” Disgust was written all over your face as you looked down on him. You were visibly shaking, face red from anger.
“Dream on!” Gojo spat back at your allegations and you can't help but chuckle at that. In anger, you grab his face, and squeeze it tight.
“Listen, you jerk! Do you think I do not know that you have been targeting me for absolutely no reason at all? Those accidental bumps when you're walking, your not so subtle insults when I made a small mistake and many more. I know. I know that you meant to crush my spirits with that. But you know, I was used to getting bullied and really doesn't mind what you’re up to, even though it was unfair. I told myself that I just need to graduate in two years so it wouldn't matter. I don't have to meet you again after that, anyway.” You stopped for a moment licking your lips. Eyes filled with unshed tears.
“Yet, you made the absolute, most horrifying mistake, of dragging my sister in this.” You continued, breathing labored from pent up anger.
“You see this?” You moved a bit and pulled out something from your pocket. It was your phone, and you showed that it was recording.
“I’ll fuck you and we will record it. I don't usually do blackmailing on a reg, but it was you who started this so, goodluck with that.” With gritted teeth, you declared war, and you grinned when you saw how fear flickered on his eyes, and his face turned ashen, and he started thrashing, not caring if his binds bites on his skin.
“But before that!” You clapped and pulled out a cloth and forcefully covered his mouth. “I don't like you calling me names. You sick, fuck.” Gojo tried to put his head on the side, to run away from his mouth being covered, but due to his limited movements, she was able to shut him up. Cloth digging on his cheeks on how tight it was.
Chuckling, you stood up and placed your phone on the prompt up stand on the side, directly in front of Gojo. He was breathing heavily as you watched him on the screen, still trying to untie himself. You saw blood now trickling down on his tied wrists.
“Tsk tsk. Don't do that if you're hurting yourself. I promise you’ll enjoy this.” Cooing, you slowly undress in front of him, making sure that the discarding of your clothes was caught on camera.
When you're finally bare in front of him. He stopped thrashing around and his eyes were only tuned in on yours refusing to look down.
What a gentleman.
Positioning yourself on all fours, you started crawling seductively at him, and you did not miss how his skin prickled, not sure if he was scared or enjoying the show you have for him.
When you're right below him, you squeeze his knee, and he starts thrashing again, stronger this time, as you painstakingly slowly reach for his zipper. Undoing it and freeing his semi hard dick.
Grinning to piss him off, you grab his member carefully and licked the tip, like how you're licking an ice cream on a sunny day.
You felt how his body shivered from the contact and his breathing labored as he stared down at you. Long lashes fluttering, eyes hardened.
You moved your hand up and down, and licked his shaft, teasing him, as you moved your hips performing in front of the camera.
You moved a bit forward and you heard him groan when you finally put him inside your mouth, with a slurp, you started bobbing your head, hollowing your cheeks as you moved your mouth up and down his cock, enough to make him feel but not enough to cum.
You watched as he bit the cloth covering his mouth to stop himself from making any noise. And do everything in his power to stop his instinct from enjoying what you're doing for him. One wrong move, however, he pistoned himself upwards, which caused his dick to go deeper in your throat, and you involuntarily gagged at the sudden intrusion. You felt how his member twitched, enjoying the feel of your mouth on his veiny dick. Staring at his eyes, you know he loved the power he had in that small moment.
You chuckle a bit at that, the vibration causing him to twitch some more, and with a pop you let him go. His cock fully hardened, ready, red and wet from both his precum and your saliva.
Standing up, you turned your back on his face and sat on his lap. Using your finger, you open your fold, and grind your pearl on his dick, to tease him. Your other hand on your breast, playing with nipples and massaging your mound.
Satisfied on the way he groaned, and stopped cursing at you, you gave him a reward by plunging down slowly on his dick, he whimpered, mouth shut, lying to himself about not liking the way your gummy slowly molding his cock inside of you. You only squeezed him tighter, when you were a bit surprised at how deep he had gone.
You never had a dick this big before. You felt so full, and touching your belly, you can feel the shape of him.
“Satoru, I can feel you here. See?” You asked naively, looking back at him, as you squeezed him tighter and the guttural groan he let out was music to your ears.
You smiled evilly at that and started moving your hips up and down, both your hands, playing with your breast.
“Ummm…I’m doing well, right, Satoru? Is this what you want? Oh god, you're so big.” You continue to lie as you move, performing, and admittedly loving your power. Makijgvsure the video will show that Gojo consented to this.
“Please please please….touch me, Satoru. I understand that you wanted to be binded and silent but I need your touch, hmmmm?” You pretended to ask, as you looked back on his helpless face, looking pathetic, red and sweat dripping from his forehead. He looks dazed and unfocus.
“Alright, if you insist, I guess, I’ll cum by riding you on my own.” Pouting before looking back on the camera, you started increasing your pace, you know he is now close, as his voice deepened and his whimpers louder. You acted and started telling him that you’re close, he is good, and he is hitting your sensitive spot, to throw him off.
It was soon after when you felt his dick violently twitch and you felt how he came inside of you. Warmth seeping in your core and painting your walls white. You whined at that and you squeezed his knee as you looked back at the camera.
“You told me, you will not come inside.” You said, almost crying.
“What? You want some more? But I’m already tired.” At this time, you had faced him, you thinned your voice, acting cutely, but your face says otherwise. You smirked down at him. On Satoru who looks dazed and red, dick is still twitching and hard, even after just cumming.
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onmywayend · 20 hours
Text
YH|I think I love you(M)
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Dragon hybrid King Yunho x Human Princess Reader
Smut|Angst|Enemies to lovers AU|Forced marriage|Mentioned of war|Very Rough sex|Choking|Yunho hates reader at first|Yunho has PTSD|Reader keeps her company with Yunho| Vanilla sex
"!!!"Despite the torment and the pain of your body , you dare not make a sound, fearing that the person on top of you will insert even more forcefully into you. No matter how many times you have made love with Yunho, you still can't get used to his size. How can a human take a dragon's cock? Your nominal husband, Yunho, is a dragon hybrid, tall and strong, much more powerful than the average human. And you, petite and fragile, are like a delicate flower, a stark contrast to Yunho's imposing figure.
"Fuck..." You bite your lips tightly, and a hint of crimson seeps out due to the exertion. Your eyes tightly shut, tears streaming down your face, wetting the pillow. His big, thick, and long cock ravages your genitals, as if each thrust requires all his strength to penetrate as deep as possible.
He snaps your ass without any mercy, driven solely by his endless lust and desire for satisfaction. You are nothing more than his tool for releasing his carnal desires, without any love or affection.
Because humans are his least favorite beings.
"It's not enough. I need it deeper." Your right leg is lifted onto his shoulder, allowing him to penetrate even deeper, causing you even more pain. You feel as if your lower body is being torn apart, the pain spreading throughout your entire being. It's like experiencing silent torture.
"Yunho..." You somehow find the confidence to believe that if you plead a little, the man on top of you will stop.
"Stop calling my name, you slut." He slaps your buttocks with such force that a clear red mark is left on your skin.
"I'm sorry..." "Stop speaking." Slap, again, harshly. The pain makes you feel every cell in your body trembling, fingertips digging deep into the palms, leaving behind red marks.
"Does it hurt? Good, remember the consequences of angering a dragon!" He thrusts into your cunt at an inhuman pace, continuously slapping your ass with great force, intensifying the burning sensation.
Unable to endure the pain any longer, you burst into tears, uncontrollable streams running down your face, wetting your swollen eyes. Your pitiful moans and choked sobs irritate Yunho, his large hand climbing up your neck, squeezing your throat, preventing any sound from escaping.
Your breathing becomes difficult, a sense of suffocation overwhelms you, your chest tightens. Alongside the pain in your lower body, your face turns pale, beads of sweat forming on your forehead.
Your consciousness is already blurred, feeling like you could lose consciousness at any moment and pass out. After several thrusts, a warm flow suddenly fills your lower body, followed by a coolness and the release of the pressure on your neck.
The sexual encounter has finally come to an end. You no longer have the strength to get out of bed and clean yourself. All you can do is cry incessantly and take deep breaths, hoping the pain in your body dissipates quickly.
Yunho, who had already dressed himself, returns to his own room without a backward glance. You slowly turn around, your body soaked in sweat, shivering from the sudden chill. You hug the blanket tightly, not letting the warmth escape.
"Knock-knock." The sound of a knock brings you back to your senses, and you see the maid handing you a bowl of medicinal soup.
"Miss Y/N, this is contraceptive soup. Please drink it as soon as possible." You struggle to sit up, gulp down the soup, then lie back down, reflecting on the past.
You never thought you would be used as a bargaining chip and married off to Yunho. You once naively believed that you would meet your true love and spend the rest of eternity with the person you loved.
But everything changed because of the war several years ago. You were married off to the dreaded dragon race, living a life worse than death every day, silently enduring all the pain because of your status as a princess.
Humans and dragons are incompatible, and the two races have engaged in multiple wars over resources and territory. These terrible wars left a horrifying shadow in Yunho's heart, as his parents were killed by humans.
He remembers vividly the screams that rose and fell that day, and the countless corpses strewn across the battlefield.
The war ended through a political marriage, despite Yunho's unwillingness, but there was no other choice. He channeled all his hatred for humans onto you, without any mercy or care. In his eyes, you are nothing more than a tool to be used during his mating season.
-----
The sunlight falls on your face as you slowly open your eyes, but you don't feel a hint of warmth. Everyone looks at you with indifference, no one likes you.
You are like an emotionless robot, repeating the same tasks every day - getting ready, changing clothes, eating breakfast... and then waiting for night to come. His mating season usually lasts for five to ten days, and the only thing you can do is hope it ends as soon as possible.
Today is the fifth day, if you are lucky enough, as long as you get through today, you can be temporarily "free".
The evening arrives faster than you expected. You have already prepared and sat on the edge of the bed, waiting for him to finish work and come at exactly eight o'clock. This rule hasn't changed since you got married.
You stare at the clock blankly, and in the blink of an eye, it's already half past eight. This unexpected lateness leaves you puzzled. Could it be that the mating season is over? You feel a glimmer of hope, but at the same time, you dare not expect too much, afraid that the bigger the hope, the bigger the disappointment.
However, the result is not what you wished for. The knocking on the door shattered your illusion.
"Miss Y/N, Mr. Jeong wants you to go to his room." Your eyes that still had hope instantly became helpless and disappointed, and your lips no longer smiled.
"Mr. Jeong wants you to deliver medicine for him."
The maid handed you a tray with a bowl of medicinal soup. Is he sick? You find it strange because he was perfectly fine yesterday. And, how can he, who hates you so much, ask you to deliver medicine? Isn't he afraid you will poison it? With a belly full of doubts, you took the tray because there was simply no choice to refuse.
Carefully opening the door, you find the room unusually dark, and in the distance, you can hear a sinister moaning. You dare not take a step forward and want to leave and ask what's going on, but you hear the sound of the door being locked.
"What...?!" Are they really trying to kill you instead of sending medicine?
"Is it really okay like this? Just send her to the room..."
"But I don't want to die!"
Your vision goes black, and involuntarily, you take a few steps back, feeling overwhelmed with fear. They really see you as a scapegoat.
"Who...?!" Startled by a low growl, you regain your composure and shout towards the source of the sound.
"Me... Y/N, I'm bringing you medicine." You keep scanning the surroundings, observing the abnormality nearby, feeling nervous to the point of breathlessness.
"Yunho...?" You hesitantly call his name and gather the courage to take a step forward, but there is no response.
"Yunho? Are you okay?" Silence. "Where are you?" Silence. It's as if you're talking to air, with no one responding. You really want to just put down the medicine and go back to your own room, but unfortunately, the door is locked.
"Yunho?" You call his name several more times, unconsciously walking to a corner of the room and noticing several bottles of alcohol on the floor.
With the help of the faint moonlight outside the window, you see a dark shadow crouching in the corner, trembling.
"Yunho?" "Don't touch me!!" His overactive response scares you to the core, you've never seen him in such a state before. Setting down the medicine in your hand, you bend down and say softly,
"You need to take your medicine."
"No! Get away from me!"
He buries his head and cries, like a frightened child, his voice choked with sobs.
"Okay, okay. Don't take the medicine, it's fine."
You try to console him, not knowing what to do. He turns around, his eyes filled with confusion and fear, his tear-stained face evokes pity in your heart, causing it to tighten. Maybe you're just scared, that's why you're behaving this way.
"Are you okay?" You gently ask. "What happened?"
"Humans... they came."
His answer leaves you stunned, it seems he's not in his right mind. You know he's referring to the war that happened several years ago, could it be that he still has traumas?
"It's okay, the war is over, you're safe." He shakes his head, tears continuing to flow.
"No, it's not. There's the scent of humans here." Oh no, is he going to kill you the next second?
You stutter, unable to articulate your words clearly. "You... by drinking this medicine, the scent of humans will disappear."
You hurriedly lift the bowl of soup and place it in front of him, signaling him to drink it.
"Really?"
"Of course, I'm not lying to you~"
You reassure him like you're coaxing a child. He takes the bowl without any hesitation and drinks it in one gulp.
"How is it?"
"I still smell humans! There's the scent of humans on you!"
He suddenly pounces at you, the overwhelming force makes you fall to the ground, and he firmly holds your hands, leaving visible bruises on your wrists. You are scared to the point of being unable to say anything, your heart pounding wildly, your eyes filled with fear and helplessness.
"Are you going to kill me,human?" "Why would I kill you?" Your answer leaves him incredulous, doubting if he heard a figment of his imagination.
"Aren't you humans supposed to kill our dragon race?"
"That... that's others, not me..."
"Why...?"
"I... because I'm your wife." Although this statement is true, saying it feels like betraying your conscience.
"Wife?I am married?" Because of the influence of alcohol, his brain was completely unable to function clearly and his memory was disordered. He thought he was still in the past when the war broke out a few years ago.
"Yes...you are my husband. Don't you remember?" "Husband...wife..." Images of his parents flashes through his mind, and a feeling of sadness comes over him. He bends down, releasing his grip on you, and suddenly bursts into tears against your neck.
You don't understand what's going on and hesitantly pat his shoulder to comfort him. Perhaps out of compassion, you softly reassure him, saying that it's okay. Despite all your doubts, you can't ignore him because of your kind-hearted nature.
"My parents are gone, they... they..." "It's okay, I'm still here." You continue to pat his back, even though you still feel a little scared. "Will you stay with me?" "I will, I'll always be by your side." It's a lie that goes against your conscience.
"Really?" You nod. "I will always be by your side." Your words are as soft as silk, and your gentle tone seems to melt the ice in anyone's heart.
"Then, can you sing to me? My mom used to sing me to sleep." "Sing...?" His request puzzles you again. What's wrong with him? Although your mind is filled with doubts, you sing a song from your hometown to prevent him from doing anything drastic.
As you continue singing, you feel a weight pressing against you and hear the sound of breathing. Turning your head, you realize he has fallen asleep in your embrace. This is the first time you see him sleeping, and the first time you sleep with him. Unable to move, you have to maintain the same posture until the next morning.
------
Yunho had never slept so peacefully before. Every night, he is tormented by nightmares, waking up in the middle of the night. But today, he slept through the night until morning without waking up.
Rubbing his eyes, he feels a warmth and softness beneath him. He lifts his head and is surprised to see your face. Why is he sleeping with you in his arms? He remembered that he had consumed a lot of alcohol due to his post-traumatic stress disorder and had asked the servant to bring him a soothing herbal soup... Did you comfort him afterwards? He couldn't help but wonder why he, who detested humans so much, could find solace and warmth in your presence.
His cold heart seems to melt a little, and he looks at you with a gentle gaze. At that moment, you wake up from your sleep and are surprised to find him staring at you. Your face turns red instantly. "Ummm... good... good morning," you stammer nervously, biting your lip. Your appearance somehow makes him feel a bit cute.
"Morning." Did he just respond to you? He usually treats you as if you don't exist. "I... I will go back to my room. Sorry to bother you." He moves away from you, and as you try to sit up, you realize that your body is too weak, and your muscles feel sore as if they had been strained.
"Can't get up?" Seeing you struggling, he pulls you up, but accidentally applied too much force, causing you to wince in pain. He notices the bruise on your wrist, probably caused by him, and suddenly feels guilty.
You struggled to stand up but couldn't due to your weak legs, making you embarrassed and don't want to raise your head to meet his gaze. Maybe out of impatience or genuine concern, Yunho picked you up in his arms. You stare at him in surprise, unable to believe that he doesn't dislike you, and carry you to the room.
"Rest well." He places you on the bed, gently pat your head, and walks back to his room without looking back. Although it is a small gesture, it adds a touch of warmth to your heart.
---
Since that night, Yunho found his feelings towards you becoming somewhat complicated. Whenever the aftereffects of his traumatic experiences struck, he would seek you out, and you would comfort him gently, singing him to sleep and staying by his side.
He gradually felt that your presence was a necessary support and encouragement for him, even considering you his safe haven. His treatment towards you was no longer aloof but caring about your emotions and life, as he began to change the way he treated you.
Perhaps he didn't realize that his feelings for you had already shifted.
----
"Does it hurt?" His gaze full of warmth and concern, his tone gentle in a way that made it hard to believe he was once such a rough person. "A little bit..." Afraid of hurting you, he slowly entered, not as impulsive as before. You bit your lip, afraid to make any sound.
"Don't hold it in, I want to hear you." He bent down, caressing your face with his hand, looking at your rosy lips. After contemplating for a moment, he lightly touched your lips, like a butterfly brushing against a petal.
The exchange of kisses was filled with endless sweetness, it was your first kiss. He moved closer to you, applying a little more pressure, allowing you to feel the warmth on your lips and his cock pushing deeper.
"Ummm..." you made a muffled sound, feeling emotions inside you that you had never experienced before. Pleasure gradually replaced the pain beneath you, and you became more eager for the friction of his cock and even closer contact.
You slowly adjusted to Yunho's size, and in a soft voice, you said, "Please move, I want you." It took courage to say those words, fearing that the man above you would suddenly return to his rough self.
However, it seemed that your worries were unnecessary. Instead of thrusting forcefully, he moved slowly and gently, accommodating you, not wanting to cause you any pain. His hands caressed your palms, interlocking his fingers with yours, feeling the warmth from each other. His long cock eased into your tightness, effortlessly hitting your most sensitive spot.
"Right there, please." He continued to target that same spot with each thrust, causing you to moan repeatedly. The softness of the touch and the pleasure of the friction made your head spin, and you could feel every cell in your body exhilarating. Arching your back, you pressed against his strong chest, making your heart beat faster.
He kissed your lips again, then moved on to your jaw and collarbone, before placing a kiss on your neck. His kisses slowly moved up from your neck to your ears, teasing every inch of skin underneath with his tongue.
He returned to your collarbone, leaving a trail of kisses accompanied by suctions, causing a surge of heat throughout your body.
The speed of his thrusts increased, with shorter intervals hitting your G-spot. You moaned, the stimulation driving you closer to climax.
"Cum with me." His words acted as a switch, and without warning, you reached climax, waves of heat rushing through every corner of your body, your heartbeat racing as if it wanted to escape. It was the first time you had experienced such pleasure in your previous sexual encounters.
Your juices wrapped around his cock, the wet and hot sensation driving him insane. After a few more thrusts, he came inside you. Both of you were gasping for air, slowly calming down. You got up, put on your clothes, and planned to leave.
Yunho suddenly felt a wave of reluctance and loss in his heart, he didn't want you to go. "Where are you going?" "To my room, and I'll take the pill." You looked at him, puzzled by his disappointed expression. Wasn't this something he always did? It was just that this time, it was you who was leaving.
"No, don't take the pill." "Huh?" He walked up to you, naturally took your hand, and his eyes were filled with love as he said,
"Don't leave, just stay with me." He pulled you back into his embrace, sitting on the edge of the bed, his hands wrapped around your waist, burying his head in your chest and pecking it, then raised his head to meet your gaze.
"Stay." You hesitated, wanting to say something but unable to find the right words in your confused mind. You nodded, and he smiled, gently laying you down on the bed, keeping his chest close to your back, inhaling the scent of your body wash.
In this moment, he felt an incredible sense of happiness, and you felt an overwhelming warmth.
Perhaps at this moment, he finally realized that he had fallen in love with you.
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There's something in the differing emphasis that Brad and Hunter and Charles place on the phrase "good guy" that really affected me on my first watch and hit even harder on my second. I'm going to try and put it into words.
When Brad and Hunter say it, they say "we're good guys", as in, good at everything a guy "should" be good at - good at sports, popular with the ladies, on their way to a good university. But they turn out to be total shitheads. They don't care about being "good", they just care about their reputation, how they're perceived. It's status and power - they're good guys and they feel entitled to do whatever they want.
But when Charles, feeling betrayed by this reveal of their character, says he wanted them to be good guys, the emphasis is completely different. Charles wants to be a "good guy". He doesn't want to be a "bad guy".
The emphasis is on good, because that's really the crux of Charles' greatest fears, isn't it?
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When Charles wants to be a good guy, he doesn't mean it the way Brad and Hunter do; that veneer of goodness that comes with popularity. He means that nothing he did was ever good enough for his dad. Doing the good thing and helping that kid his "friends" were beating up literally got him killed. Trying to stop Devlin only got him trapped in the loop, stuck until his friends freed him, only able to watch helplessly as a mother and her innocent children get slashed to death before his eyes.
And it's this helplessness that is the thing that truly sets him off at the end of episode 4.
It always struck me just how much of his breakdown there, for as much as he finally gives a voice to his own hurt at the injustice of his situation, was still about other people. Because he was secure-ish, at one point, when he was Edwin's partner and protector. He thought he did a good job at it anyways, but guess not, because something obviously happened with Edwin and he's not talking to him about it. And he likes to think he did good with solving cases, but Crystal is still hurting and haunted by a demon and nearly threw herself off a cliff earlier that day because she wants her parents so badly, and he's no closer to helping her solve that. And all of it, every single part of it, is a reflection of his own unresolved trauma; that he never "made it better" and he can't, so now he tries to be good enough for other people, but that isn't working anymore either, and now someone is threatening to take Edwin away, and even this final shocking act of anger and violence is still in service of protecting; of saving someone from the suffering he was never able to escape except by fucking dying.
His anger, really, stems from the injustice of it all, and the abuse of power by guys who can get away with it because they're guys, when they should've, could've, been good to others instead. It's a large part of why he projected so strongly onto Brad and Hunter - they did everything right, they were good guys who got screwed over, because even if everyone seems to love you, there's always that one person you can never please, right? Who will hurt you, no matter how good you are. When it's revealed that Brad and Hunter are far more like his bullies, like Devlin, like his dad, than he'd thought - controlling, intolerant, cruel to those who "step out of line" - Charles feels betrayed and horrified because he related to them... so what does that say about him?
But here's one major difference that Charles does not seem to recognize well. Charles has never had the power in these situations. He was the victim, and his being the victim is through no fault of his own, but the fault of those who decided to be cruel. It is certainly not contingent on how good he is. Being good in the eyes of people who want to hurt you will not stop them from hurting you.
When he lashes out at the Night Nurse, it's out of helplessness and rage. Once again, he's pitted against someone who holds more power than he does and is threatening harm, and he's just been bitterly, brutally reminded that a smile and a helping hand and a firm word never, ever worked to make it stop. There's only one other way he can think of to shift the balance of power, and he's finally livid enough to actually do it. This violence is a desperate attempt to finally overcome yet another force much greater than him, a transdimensional entity that has unjustly arrived to take his best friend to Hell. And Charles wins, he did it, he stopped her, at least for the moment. But at what cost, when he looks at his friends and can't tell whether they look more scared for him or of him? And can he blame them, when he's clearly scared of his own anger and how overwhelming it is now that it's been let out?
Because he tries so hard to be good and it's never good enough to stop the suffering. Because that anger rose to the surface so easily and maybe that means he's not good at all.
But of course, Charles once again misses something important here - there is a distinction in why that anger exists. His dad, Devlin, and Brad and Hunter get angry because their power over others makes them feel they have a right to punish when things don't go their way. Charles gets angry because he feels more helpless than he'd care to admit, and seeing cruelty inflicted onto others by those with power makes him want to cut them down to size.
And herein lies the second major difference. Charles... is a kind person, at heart. He's genuine. He really does likes helping out, he likes making people happy, he doesn't turn people away who need help, he's friendly and protective. The scene where Edwin pulls him out of his fear that he's somehow bad even though he really doesn't want to be, is outright one of my favourite scenes for what it brings to both of their characters. Edwin knows exactly what to say. While it's always good to check your behaviour, to apologize and take accountability - because no one can be good all the time, and even the most well-intentioned of us will mess up sometimes - Edwin is right.
"Bad guys do not worry about being bad guys."
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Diasomnia x MC! like Vaggie
⊹Sinopsis⊹ೃ🐉⋆ The Diasomnia boys with a MC! Or Yuu like Vaggie.
⊹Relación⊹ೃ🐉⋆ Fall in love/ Free of interpretation.
⊹¡FEM! MC/Yuu/Lector ⊹ೃ 🐉
⋆⊹Clarifications: I decided that the reader will have almost the same story as Vaggie, the reader will be a ''Fallen Angel'' but you are free to change it, in this case since I am such a SIMP for Malleus I made it directly as a love relationship, however you are free to decide.
⊹Vaggie's Analysis⊹ೃ 🐉⋆
• Vaggie is someone who does not trust quickly, due to her abusive and unfair past towards her, she is on the defensive most of the time, she is someone serious and diligent, she is also protective of those she cares about, sometimes she can be little patience, she usually uses force more when she feels conflicts nearby since it is the way she learned to solve conflicts, she has an inferiority complex and self-hatred, due to her upbringing and education she is very good in hand-to-hand combat, she is not afraid to risk her life frequently in moments of danger, she dislikes talking or remembering her past, she has emotional traumas, she has honest love to give and has always believed that there are more ways to use justice than just force, Vaggie He also believes in the idea of ​​sincere redemption and tolerance.
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Malleus Draconia
🐉 Malleus is fascinated, no joke, this man is in heaven. YOU ARE A REAL ANGEL!!!
🐉 Malleus immediately notices the celestial "aura" in you, which although attenuated, still remains within you and thanks to his agile mind Malleus relates you to the old stories and legends he read about "celestial beings" who had many functions and cannot help be delighted with your existence.
🐉 Although with their interactions, Malleus grows a doubt in his head: "Where are your wings?" is what he asks himself when he remembers having read that most, if not all, angels have at least a pair of wings, however he thinks that it may be a private issue if you have not mentioned it and therefore neither does he, he thinks that you will eventually.
🐉 With every interaction you two have, Malleus falls more and more into an unconscious infatuation, you are serious but not insensitive, you are respectful but not distant or fearful, you are witty but also emotional... You are practically perfect in his eyes.
🐉 Even though you're not supposed to have magic, Malleus doesn't care in the slightest! He even finds it exceptional that you have excellent fighting skills that allow you to immobilize beings more powerful than you and without an advantage like magic, he must say that he never gets tired of watching you train.
🐉 Malleus is relieved that you're an Angel, that means he won't have to worry about seeing you away from him anytime soon! Plus: you have a human charm, but with the skills of a fairy, the best of both worlds! The dragon boy is happy! (Chapter 7)
🐉 Your constant protective attitude amuses Malleus, you can see him with a characteristic mysterious and somewhat mocking smile of his when you try to intervene to protect him, even when you know that he has more than enough power to protect himself you still try to do it for him!
"Oh could you be more adorable, Daughter of Heaven?"
🐉 For Malleus who is hungry for love and contact, you are a rest, you remind him of the soft moonlight that provides company and security in the darkness of the night. You hug him, kiss him and even do small but long-awaited acts for him, such as: taking him by the waist, carrying him in your arms, taking him to do little dances while you hum a song. Malleus thanks any type of supreme entity for letting you come into his life to give him all your love.
🐉 Without realizing it, Malleus notices something curious: your attitude is not usually the stereotype that someone would have of an angel, you are like "an angel with the attitude of a demon" and in your eyes, Malleus can be physically intimidating, even mistaken for a demon, but his personality... In your eyes he is more worthy of being called an angel than you... Say it for him and you will have an adorable dragon boy sobbing out of tenderness and with a ring just for you 💚
🐉 I have a Small Scenario:
(After his Overblot) You and Malleus are in his room in Diasomnia, you see how distraught he is and how overwhelmed he feels by everything he did: guilt and sadness encompass most of his heart, but you know perfectly well What to do: You take his much larger hand in yours, giving him your "Are you okay?" look... Malleus brings his gaze towards you, he still has those hateful emotions in him and you leave the words aside and simply sing:
🎶"You've already done so much. So many lives you've changed. So many souls you've touched. And in the end, if it's only me you've saved..."🎶
Malleus watches you, somewhat surprised because you never sing, especially in such a... sincere way... Somehow, it seems like he knows what you will say and sings along with you.
🎶"There's something that I've been dying to say
More than anything, more than anything
Need you to know I love you more than anything~
More than anything~"🎶
And finally you and Malleus seal your eternal, deep and sincere love with a kiss... Knowing that no matter what, your love can illuminate even the deepest and darkest pits of hell... And you smile, knowing that Malleus is calm now, with you.
🐉 Malleus already refers to you as his future wife, you are everything he has always longed for and you finally feel understood and supported by him, both create a couple not only powerful... But also what proves that love is everything that unites all types of beings, humans, Faes, Angels and more...
🐉 With everything said, Malleus knows that thanks to you he will no longer have to hide or pretend to be something he is not because you are capable of threatening even the entire world for him and he will do the same for you, so Malleus writes a letter to his grandmother and the entire government of Briar Valley that says they must prepare, because when he returns the first thing he will do is form a future with you and his beloved family (Lilia, Silver, Sebek and You), accepting everything that comes with it and of all kinds of species and this time... He does not will make the same mistakes as his parents.
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Lilia Vanrouge
🩸 "Oya~? What's an adorable little angel like you doing in a place like Night Raven College, mhh? Oh you look like a cute moth~!"
🩸 Lilia discovers you almost immediately, thanks to his many centuries alive it is relatively easy for him to identify a person's race. (Spoiler: Lilia's age is 700 years according to Chapter 7)
🩸 Despite the above, Lilia had never seen an Angel or fallen Angel in person, only one or another story from books or war legends that deal with Angels. (Chapter 7)
🩸 So knowing the current Lilia, you have an adorable Vampire Fae asking you thousands of things, although it is difficult for you to talk about it, you always try to be polite and calm when interacting with him, you can't resist to his cuteness.
🩸 When you decide to open up and tell him about your past, Lilia accepts that perhaps you and he have more in common than it seems... Lilia understands what it is to live through wars and kill without really wanting it, so you have him there to support you and feel calmly accepting that tragic past together. (Chapter 7)
🩸 In a way Lilia is relieved, being an Angel or Fallen Angel you will live almost as long if not longer than a Fae and that means she won't have to worry about seeing you die soon.
🩸 Lilia has exceptional skills as a soldier and former right-hand woman of Princess Maleanor, however, being the former second-in-command of your former army, he can recognize your fierceness and determination as a warrior, and he even declares a tie between you and him. (Chapter 7)
🩸 Lilia can also identify in you your immense capacity to love... Sometimes you bring back memories... He knows that if you turned out to be the girlfriend of one of his Diasomnia children (Malleus, Silver and Sebek) it would be excellent, you are capable of giving your own life for those you love but also You are capable of living for your loved ones.
🩸 On the other hand, if Lilia becomes your partner, he will do everything to see you smile and relax as much as possible, he will make sure to take care of you and make you feel as loved as you love him, without a doubt the love of an Angel (with the attitude of a devil ) and a Demon (with an angel personality).
🩸 Either way, Lilia now has a different way of seeing you and once again accepts that love can live in all types of beings... Mortal or not and with thousands of other differences... Lilia knows how difficult it is to love and lose someone, even losing oneselves in the past and memories and he's proud to see and know that you understand what it means to love despite the obstacles and that you are one of the few who still insists on doing something for others and in creating tolerance and peaceful coexistence between all types of living beings.
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Silver
⚔ Silver is fascinated, sincerely fascinated... You are so adorable, like a cute moth (Bombyx mori) looking for the light after being locked in a horrible pit of darkness and sadness.
⚔ Silver wants to learn from you, you are admirable in his eyes: Upright, moral, respectful, strong and determined. A real example for him to follow, especially after seeing your great skills in combat.
⚔ Although Silver soon realizes that you are not only that "soldier" that you usually show with your serious and defensive attitude almost always, showing a softer and gentler side of you when you are calm and that at the same time makes Silver want to learn more and more of you...
⚔ Silver can notice your great determination to defend your ideals, you are kind to everyone you can regardless of their race or gender or even species... Look at Grimm.
⚔ As you watch combat, Silver feels how his already great admiration for you grows... You are skillful and resourceful, and you almost always seek to protect him in one way or another and that causes his heart to beat faster. (Chapter 7)
⚔ With all the new knowledge Silver has acquired since it all began (Malleus Overblot) you have been an anchor on the earth, constantly reminding him that his past or origin is defined by his essence even after a while... You reveal your past to him. (Chapter 7)
⚔ Silver is speechless, but connecting the dots everything agrees... Your past would explain why you are so determined to change mutual hatred and resentments, suggesting a peaceful path with gentleness, Silver knows that you are a true Angel when he can identify that your heart is overflowing of love and pure intentions.
⚔ "I'll punch you if I have to." – Do you remember that line? well, it's canon here. (Chapter 7)
⚔ In the event that you and Silver form a romantic relationship, Silver will know that he will never change you for anything because you are more than perfect in his eyes, especially because of the fact that you love... You love more than anything, regardless of the species. Even if he is "human" and you are an "angel or fallen angel" you both love each other more than anything and thanks to that you will live "happily ever after" as it was meant to be...
⚔ In any case, Silver sees you as someone worthy of admiration in every way and knowing that he can trust you with whatever he needs, he truly believes that you are a true angel and he wants to be even stronger to be a knight worthy of protect you.
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Sebek Zigvolt
🐊 Sebek is conflicted... At first he does think that you are a human, an ordinary one and even irritating and unworthy of being at Night Raven College.
🐊 However, he has witnessed your fighting skills and respects you for that, you seem like someone worthy on the battlefield.
🐊 Although in reality Sebek does not make an effort to want to discover anything beyond what you show and although you appreciate it, sometimes you really want Sebek to accept that Humans and Faes are not as different as they believe and as you have always defended.
🐊 It must be said, you and Sebek will have many arguments: Sebek on the one hand tries to ignore and hide the fact of being half-blood and you try to make him understand that both Faes and Humans are equal in many ways and that both races deserve respect.
🐊 So I'm sorry if you thought your interactions with Sebek would be immediately friendly or romantic, you'll have to wait until Chapter 7.
🐊 With everything that Silver, Sebek and you have experienced, it must be said that it is obvious that Sebek's perspective has changed. (Chapter 7)
🐊 In fact! It is during these moments that Sebek realizes the fact that you are not even human but an Angel or Fallen Angel, a being that according to many books and people: a perfect being. (Chapter 7)
🐊 So yes, it is very likely that Sebek wants to apologize for how he treated you on many occasions and since you are an angel (wink) you obviously forgive him and remain friends and maybe something more. (Chapter 7)
🐊 We will have to see Sebek's progress during the remainder of the Chapter, sorry.🥹
🐊 However, you become someone of Sebek's respect and affection, for him you are a type of authoritarian figure who defends tolerance and justice without violence among all types of people regardless of race or species.
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Nymph's Note:
I must say that this is my favorite so far, I am very fond of Mal-Mal, Silver and Lilia, so I put a lot of effort into this one, which is the last one in this series and request are officially open!
I hope you enjoyed!
Remeber to tune in, end of this broadcast!
Diasomnia Dorm x MC! Like Vaggie Done!
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Hi! I'd love to hear your thoughts on Dark Gale! I feel like the concept I'm thinking about (read: gnawing at the pulp of my brain) is OK, but could be better. Any insight you have is greatly appreciated!
Hello! Thank you for asking about dark Gale! Do you have a snack and a drink? Alrighty. So.
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Gale to me is a pretty dark character already. His ambition becomes obsession, and he seeks to cross boundaries he should not cross out of (well placed) anger and a deep insecurity.
On first meeting he is sweet, kind of bumbly, personable. The first thing you do to help him out is take his hand and wrench him from a portal. It’s a far cry from Astarion holding a knife to your throat, Lae’zel pointing a sword at you, Shadowheart judging you for keeping Lae’zel’s company. First meeting Wyll, he says he needs to kill a devil. You meet Karlach because you’re trusting him that she’s a devil and needs to die. All of them have some kind of violence attached to them whether that’s from being martial themselves or in Karlach’s case the huge amounts of blood you follow to get to her.
Gale? Nah. He’s just stuck. He needs help, you pull him out, he shakes your hand, assures you your kindness will be repaid. If you send him to camp instead of recruiting him then and there, he says he’ll cook for you! And what he’s done here is ingratiate himself with Tav, make himself as indespensable as possible by volunteering an essential task, and he’s offered knowledge regarding ceremorphosis.
Later in camp, you can talk to him about what’s going on and he’ll compliment you (‘you’re a good sport’ / ‘spot on’) and if he’s a little arrogant well that’s because he has the skill to back it up and he is kind and he does cook, so you forgive it. You get to the grove and if you’re a good aligned Tav you step in front of Arka’s crossbow, you save Arabella, you rescue Mirkon from the harpies. Gale approves. Alright then, he’s a pacifist? He likes kids. This is a safe guy. And you can forgive the magic item consumption because well. He’s a good guy and he wouldn’t hurt anyone and he’s useful around camp and you seem to get along well. That’s fine. It’s like a chronic illness. We can manage that.
And then he can’t keep quiet anymore. The consumption of the weave hardly has an effect now. His guilt compels him to be honest, so he gathers everyone together. He calls himself a walking shadow, he admits to being a magical prodigy and his relationship with Mystra. Alright then. He used to be far more powerful than he is now, well so was everyone. The man clearly resents Mystra for not allowing him the kind of power he felt entitled to.
He kneels in front of Tav- kneels, this powerful mage, because is is trying to get them to see- and lets them into the dark. All this time, he has been walking around with parisitic magic in his chest, dark magic, something corrupting. He’s not said a word about the danger he poses not only to the party but to a good chunk of the surrounding area.
Gale is deeply self preserving. He can be persuaded to stay after massacring the grove by saying there’s strength in them staying together, in the survival instinct. By contrast Karlach just ups and leaves. His morality is grey and it’s what makes him interesting. In the grove, if you say it sounds like he has something to confess, he pointedly asks Tav if they’re without vice or sin, and then says no. He doesn’t think they’re quite that boring. He will bend the rules or break them if needed, it doesn’t take much to nudge him onto the darker path. He is just like Astarion in that his insecurity manifests as hunger for power and control. Unlike Astarion however, Gale is a rich boy who voluntarily isolated himself, and where Astarion becomes gentler as his story goes on, Gale becomes insistent and obsessive and even possessive. He says he’s getting that crown ‘for us’ in his act 3 scene, and… no he’s not. He’s still doing it for himself, it’s just now he can tell himself it’s for something greater because he’s in love. Just like Astarion insisting that ascending will keep him AND Tav safe. No. They’re both wrong, and frankly they’re two sides of the same coin.
Nevermind his combat lines, all misconceptions about him being a pacifist are utterly shattered when he admits to Tav that it turns him on to see them post battle, sweaty and bloody. He clearly revels in it all. I don't think it'd take much for him to go seeking a fight just for the thrill of it.
And if you happen to dump him, well… he reminds Tav of the bomb in his chest. He says maybe it’s best not to shake such a vessel as himself. The threat is subtle, but it is there. Hells, if you take him to meet Astarion alone he threatens to incinerate the vampire if he uses that knife on Tav. He’s not a gentle person and he’s created this incredible persona that hides it well under layers and layers of politeness, kindness, amiable chat, a willingness to take important tasks off Tav’s hands.
This isn’t to say I don’t absolutely love the guy. He is wonderful in many, many ways, but that undercurrent of darkness runs deeper than first appears.
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The thing about the new hunger games book is that it could be a Haymitch centric story or it could be otherwise and I trust Collins either way, but looking at her themes (propaganda and control) I think there's a lot of room for a story that is definitely about the Capitol, the creation of these specific games, the control and propaganda and power. These are special games, twice as many children stolen as usual, and they should be won by one of the low number districts as usual, powerful, semi-Capitol districts. Everything is poised and planned for.
Except one tribute keeps poking through. He refuses to kill, that's alright, a lot of them don't have the guts. He travels away from the centre, and by all rights should be killed by the arena but he's clever, he works out the poison, the vicious animals, he escapes it all.
Well, never mind, there's 48 tributes and far more interesting things going on than some twelve kid. Until there's 40 tributes, then 30, than 20. President Snow holds watch parties and celebrations, the Capitol bets on winners and losers, tossing around money like it's worthless.
The twelve boy who should be dead has an alliance with a twelve girl until she leaves, not wanting to kill him. She still screams for him when she's killed. He still runs back to hold her hand as she dies.
A sweet gesture. Makes people invested. Still, might not be ideal to show, don't want to humanize them that much, so it's cut. Easy. The games are all under control and only show what Snow wants them to show. The people are happy or content or afraid, but they're all watching exactly what they should be watching.
Until the twelve boy wins. He wins by using the arena, a trick, a twist to it. And the games are trapped in their own making, you see, because the Capitol can't get rid of him. Everyone knows he's the victor because everyone saw. Everything about Haymitch was wrong, everything about his victory was a kick in the teeth to the Capitol. He was a District Twelve victor who won by refusing to play the game properly on a year that was meant to show the Capitol's power. He was out of their control and it hurt them, we know it hurt them, they killed every single person he loved because of it. Haymitch isn't the center of the story, he's the flaw in the perfect code. He takes the control of the Capitol and he bruises it. 24 years later it's broken by another twelve child who held the hand of her friend while she as dying.
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strawberry-daiquiris · 14 hours
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💙 drunken kiss / tipsy -- i know you said you'd never write it ... but lestappen in your girl!lando verse
oh anon, honestly... you don't know the power you've wielded here because i truly did believe i'd not write it, but when i saw this prompt and i had a nice short way of doing it... i had to!!! please enjoy, i will always be nervous about my max and charles voices lmao.
_____________________
“Charlie! Charlie! We’re leaving.”
Charles barely hears George over the music, dancing with her eyes closed, packed in by hundreds of other beautiful people in short dresses and open shirts. She can still feel the tears drying on her cheeks, the snot in her nostrils from crying about him. 
“Are you coming with us, or not?”
She opens her eyes, blinking the flashing colours out of the way before she focuses on George. Her hair is in loose waves around her neck, sticking to her skin from the sweat. Alex is right behind her, a possessive hand on George’s waist, fingers curled into the silk of her dress. It’s daring, almost, for them, and Charles doesn’t want to be involved with whatever game they’re playing. 
“It’s fine, you go, you go.” Charles cranes her neck, searching for someone she knows, enough of a connection to the dark room that George will abandon the pretence that she wants Charles to come with them, and not to ditch her so she can go and do whatever it is that lesbians do. Charlie thinks there’s nipple sucking involved, and maybe dildos. The closest she’s ever got to it was kissing Lando in a game of truth and dare, but she thinks they’re not supposed to talk about that anymore. “Pierre is here, and Max. I will be fine.”
Carlos is still here too, somewhere, but she doesn’t mention that, or George will never leave. Charles turns her head to the sky, swaying to the music, ignoring both the creeping fear she doesn’t look sexy, and George’s worried glances as Alex steers her towards the door.
An hour could’ve passed, or two minutes, when she feels a tap on her shoulder. 
“For you,” Max’s smile is wide, reaching both corners of his face, like he’s so happy his jaw is unhinging. He didn’t even win the Championship today, nothing squared off except Checo’s P2. Charles wishes… but then, it hasn’t been the year for dreaming, for her. “Champagne. Christian, of course, bought the bottle.”
Charles snorts, taking a delicate sip, trying to avoid the bubbles from sparkling in her nose. 
“Mate, I should not be drinking this. Fred would be so…”
Fred wouldn’t care, Charles remembers. He’d probably take the bottle for himself, sit in a corner and laugh at his good luck. She keeps forgetting, since Mattia left, that she doesn’t need to be fearful of getting too close to the drivers from the other teams. Doesn’t need to hang her existence off Carlos and Maranello and being the sweet, innocent Madonna they imagine on her knees.
“You gave a good fight, today,” Max yells, and Charles can feel his spit on her cheek, letting her mouth drop open so it falls on her tongue. Sometimes, she wants Max more than she knows what to do with, and she’s heard things. That Kelly and him are sleeping in separate bedrooms, that she’s not in Vegas because they’re waiting until the end of the season to call it off. “When you went into the chicane? Ha, I was thinking maybe the deg would…”
Max makes a sweeping gesture with his arm, one of the classics. Charlie knows exactly what he’s getting at, the exact millimetres needed to take one of the corners and not lose pace. The guy he nearly hits in the face? Not so much. She reaches a hand out, stops him from taking out half the drinks on the dance floor. 
“Can we go somewhere?” Charles shouts, and suddenly she can’t think of anything she wants to do less than dance, in a tight dress, surrounded by guys who think she’s only a 7 because she’s got natural breasts and doesn’t really know how you contour your face. “I don’t care where.”
Max takes a full bottle from the table on their way to the door, and Charlie keeps her head down when they pass a group of Ferrari mechanics by the bar. Pierre spots them, narrowing his eyes, and Charles flips him off, then nods. She knows what she’s doing. 
“You cannot just get married here, of course,” Max tells her as they walk down past one of the chapels, way off the strip by now, swigging from the bottle of champagne. It’s cold, too cold for her dress, and Max’s AlphaTauri jacket is big on her shoulders, smells like him and his cologne. “You have to apply for the licence, yes? And they won’t let you do it when you’ve had drinks…”
He holds up the bottle, sloshing some onto his shirt. Max’s hair is a mess, and Charles leans a hand out to flatten it, automatically. She can’t remember the last time they were somewhere together, drunk. Monaco, maybe. New Year’s. Kelly had been there, and Charles’ boyfriend at the time. She can remember watching them kiss at midnight, soft and sincere, whilst Laurent pawed at her arse and ground his crotch against hers.
She broke up with him the next week. 
It had just run its course. 
“So we cannot tonight then?” Charlie purrs, and she knows it’s a bit unfair, but she’s wanted someone to flirt with all night, ever since Carlos told her he was bringing her, some model, his new girlfriend. “That is a shame, Max.”
“Ah, the press would love it.”
“Mmm,” Charles takes the bottle from him, and threads her other hand with his, swinging it between them and making him twirl her under the neon flashing lights of the chapel. “Mrs Charlie Verstappen.”
Max frowns, dragging her to a halt, and they’re very close. Above them, Cupid swings with a creak.
“You would keep your own name,” Max says seriously, and when he swallows around the lump in his throat, Charles can see it. And she knows then, that he’s thought about it, about destiny and soul mates and all the foolish things she starts to believe when she looks at their birth charts and the twin signs in their lives. La predestinata. “Of course.”
“Of course.” Charles nods, exaggerated and slow, and when she stops, she leaves her face tilted skywards. If he doesn’t take the hint now, Charles thinks, then he never will.
Max takes the bottle from her hands before he does anything, placing it carefully at their feet, and when he wraps his arms around her to a chorus of honks from a passing limo, Charles knows.
This time, it’s going to be different. 
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It's been really interesting to see all the takes on the end of TOTK.
Some people seem perfectly happy with the ending as is. I'm one of them! I'm so happy that Link and Zelda finally get to look forward to a future where Ganondorf is gone and they can choose how they want to live. It makes me cry with the best of 'em.
A lot of people seem to be pretty happy with it but think Zelda should have kept some draconic traits. And I get that too, for a number of reasons! Everything from "trauma doesn't just vanish and there should have been something remaining" to "it would invalidate her sacrifice for them to just disappear" to "it would just look cool".
My personal take on it is, yeah, it'd be cool and it would add gravitas to her sacrifice- but look at the fanart! The Dragon Zelda plotline already has unbelievable gravitas as is. She spent millennia enduring mindless suffering she probably couldn't remember the source of or fully comprehend.
Zelda remembers sensations from her time as a dragon- the fact she was asleep, how it felt right before she woke up (like a warm, loving embrace ;-;). Some part of her memory is probably deeply rooted with that pain still.
So why, why, WHY would Sonia, Rauru, and Link- arguably the three people who love Zelda more closely and personally than anyone else across time and space, in this canon -leave her with dragon traits, if they have the power not to? Why would they make her remember millennia of pain every time she looks at her hands, or looks in the mirror? Are the marks on her soul not enough? Must she live in a body that would mar her happy ending and remind her of her eternal suffering for the rest of her life- for all of time? Would she have even remained mortal if some of the dragon had been left in her? Could she have had the life among her loved ones, the life helping Hyrule alongside Link, that she wanted?
And besides, if we (and by we I mean my undiagnosed-but-autistic-trait-littered brain) look at the game mechanic that turned her into a dragon- secret stone inside body = dragon. Secret stone not inside body = no dragon. If the recall rune removed the secret stone from inside her (she has it back at the end of the game and we ALL know Link took that thing up to the highest Sky Island he could reach so no mortal is ever freaking getting to it), there shouldn't be any dragon left. It wouldn't make sense to put Zelda through a bittersweet or half-victory in the end. It wouldn't have felt as clean and joyful, and wouldn't have been the payoff Link and Zelda have earned after all their work and fighting and sacrifice. Zelda has been given another chance to be what she always wanted to be: free.
I don't see a reason to pour more trauma on these kids- the ending wraps up the story very solidly as it stands, and so I don't personally subscribe to the "zelda should have had dragon traits" concept.
It does look cool tho.
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