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#chan one shot
taeminsung · 11 months
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one last song..
pairing: chan x reader
summary: in this episode of chan’s room, he did the one thing he never thought he would do for himself.
mina’s notes: listening to one of my favorite songs and just thought this would be very chan. please enjoy ♡
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The empty hotel room was filled with a deafening silence that it almost felt alive. Some small part of Chan wished that he would have told any of the members about his little plan, but a different part of him knew that if he had, he most likely would have chickened out of doing it. Hearing his own heartbeat in his head, he considered the options if he just went to bed and gave up on everything, what would everyone think of him? There was a slight shake to his hands as he continues to get everything set up for his weekly Chan’s room, hoping that one special person would tune in like they always did. It was the routine every Sunday and it never mattered what you were doing but you always dropped everything you made sure to turn on the live stream. Today was the first time he ever hesitated before turning on the love, knowing that by the end of the night, he was either going to have his heart broken or mend what he broke in the first plan. Closing his eyes, he took a final deep breath before hitting the button to go live.
Feeling more nervous than usual, his eyes stayed glued to the chat trying to reply to comments as they came in. He was happy to have different questions flooding in about the tours, members, and anything else that allowed him to push off his plan. It wasn’t a difficult plan really, just one he didn’t know how to move forward with. The day before during sound check, he planned it all. A few easy steps he thought at the time. Go live, as he always did, fully admit to having a special someone, play an unreleased song, then deal with the repercussions of his actions. Honestly, he knew that the last step should be the one that he was the most unsure about, but step one of the plans scared him to no end. Chan know that he would have to deal with the company likely giving him a lashing for showing a song that wasn’t done, but he didn’t know what your reaction would be.
Just weeks earlier, you two had been cuddled on his couch in the dorm, listening to some of the new 3Racha songs, deciding which one they would use for an upcoming opportunity. Before Chan really understood what was going on, you both were on opposite sides of the couch yelling at each other, with Changbin trying to calm the situation down to the best of his ability. Jisung was curled under the blanket pulling at your arm to get you to sit down and take a breath before anything else was said. The memory was potty for Chan, but he remembered you screaming that you never felt like a priority and that you felt like you always had to beg for his attention before slamming the door to their dorm as you left. The silence that had filled the dorm until Hyunjin came home, rivaled that from earlier and he hated how that was your last interaction for weeks because work again took him away from you.
Slowly coming back to reality, he realized that he had been utterly silent, lost in the memory of that night and when he dared to look at the chat, everyone was asking if he was alright or why he just went silent for so long. I’m not really sure if I’m ok, he started with an uneven sign, I messed something up in my personal life and I don’t know if I can really fix it. Glancing down at his phone, he had a message from Felix to let him in the room so he could hang out. One second everyone, we will have a special guest tonight, Chan stated before going to open the door. When he opened the door, he didn’t expect to be greeted with six other people standing behind Felix. Quickly they all squeezed by him and into the room, shouting their hellos to the live but mostly staying out of view as they made themselves comfortable on various surfaces. Signing, Chan returned to his original spot in front of the camera as he explained that the surprise guest was actually all of his members, and he wouldn’t pressure them to be on camera if they didn’t want to.
A comfortable silence filled the room this time as he continued to read the chats that came through. Oh, I did start to talk about something before they came in, he hummed looking around at each of his members, watching as all of them gave him supportive gestures for him to continue his story. When his eyes fell on Changbin, he slightly tilted his head in confusion as to what was going on. We wanted to support whatever crazy plan you came up with, it’s all of us together, Changbin said before going back to whatever it was that he was going on his phone. Time continued to pass and the tightness in Chan’s chest started to gnaw at him as he quickly read the chats. Taking another deep breath and final glance at everyone in his room, he decided that it was now or never. The short crazy three step plan that he had come up with was finally going to be set into action.
Alright, I have something I need to confess, Chan stated before closing his eyes and remembering your tear stained face that night as he continued, there is a special someone in my life, well I hope they are still in my life, not that anything bad happened to them, but I ah, pausing his rambles, he watched as Jisung sat next to him, placing his hand on his shoulder waiting for him to continue. I really messed up with this someone and I just want to apologize to them for keeping them in the dark so long when I should have been showing you off to the world. Tears pricked at his waterline as his fingers played on his phone finding the file that he was so scared to play to the world. The nights he wouldn’t sleep since that fight were spent creating something for you, in the hopes that you would understand and take him back. So, I, uh, created a song that I wanted to share with you, please let me know your thoughts, he concluded knowing that the last part was directed at you and only you.
The soft beat of the song started to play as so many eyes watched him sink back into the couch. Chan’s voice again filled the room as he covered his face embarrassed that he was playing the song he wrote for you, for the entire world to hear.
Right here right now, you are on my mind, and I think about you all the time.
As the words continued to be heard by everyone, Chan couldn’t help but to think back to the good times that you shared. When he first met you at the music store, he didn’t expect to leave with your number and a blush spread across his face. Truly, he felt bad for his members at the time because he couldn’t stop himself from talking about you for weeks after that encounter, scared to message you first in case you were just being polite when he asked for your number.
I’m sending a message to you, and I’m hoping that it will get through.
The last nights that you two would steal away from the world, whether you were sneaking into JYP to hang out with him while he worked on new songs, or when you’d both meet somewhere to enjoy a meal before wandering the city. For Chan, it never really mattered what the two of you ended up doing when you were together, as long as you were just together to begin with. He enjoyed the quiet moments with you when you were busy working on your stuff, and he could just be in the same space as you. It brought a calm to his life that he didn’t realize he was missing until you, even now, that calm was crumbling without you just there.
I miss having you by my side.
Maybe it was the comfort he developed in your presence but having you by his side gave him the strength to work long hours, to create more songs than he knew what to do with, to be the strong pillar that he knew his members needed from him when things got tough. While his members depended on him for a lot, he in turn depended on you to be his lighthouse in the dark days. Never once would did he put the pressure on you by telling you it all, instead he just let the moments of his head resting in your lap while you played with his hair wash away the bad that he didn’t want to deal with.
In case you hear this, then know you’re the love of my life.
Months after meeting you, he realized it so quickly. For him, there wasn’t going to be anyone else, you were his end. You, the person who made him want to be a better person. You, the one who made him smile and laugh no matter what was going on outside the walls of his room. You, the love of his life, who had endless patience for him in all things. Which only made him understand, far too late, that you blowing up on him that night meant that it was something you had wanted to share with him for a long time, or had been sharing and he just never noticed it in the way you needed him to. You, the light that he would do anything to have back in his life.
Maybe you’re listening, so here’s one last song for you.
In truth, this wasn’t going to be the official last song for you, but only the last sad song. The next song he wrote for you was going to be one that was filled with so much love and adoration that he knew he would never get anyone to sing on. He felt like a small weight was lifted off his chest as the final sounds of the melody finished and allowed silence to find its way back into the room. Peaking between his fingers he watched the chat scroll at such a speed that he couldn’t ever begin to read any of the messages there. Stealing another glance around the room, he noted the way that none of the members could look at him and swore he could have heard a few low sniffles. His heart squeezed in his chest before thinking it was best to throw in the towel and end the live, knowing that he was half the world away and you might not have had time to tune in this week. Knowing that it would be trending, and your friends would show you, he shook his head in defeat. His thoughts drifted back to the drawings board for how to make a grand gesture for you.
The incredibly quiet ping of a message sent his heart into overdrive as he saw your name light up his screen. It was short, I love you, Channie. Please continue to do the live and we can talk when you get home in a few days. In the few words that you had sent, a piece of his heart felt like it was healed instantly. Chan also knew that you didn’t love to have serious talks over the phone because expressions were such a big part of the both of you and missing those could lead to even more miscommunications. Feeling like he was himself again, he went back to reading the chats with a new found giddiness that only caused the other members to finally join in on the live, giving him even more strength to finish out the next few days knowing that he got to go home to you.
˚⁎⁺˳ ── thank you for reading! ♡
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lvllylix · 11 months
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Sun-Kissed Ripples
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Title: Sun-Kissed Ripples
Song: Butterflies by Kacey Musgraves
Pairing: Bangchan x reader
Word count: 788
Warnings: fear of water and being thrown in
Summary: Joining your boyfriend, Chan, and the rest of Stray Kids for a day by the pool proves to be an unforgettable adventure filled with laughter, splashes, and heartwarming moments.
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The summer sun hung high in the sky as you and Chan arrived at the pool where the rest of Stray Kids awaited. Excitement bubbled within you as you spotted familiar faces near the sparkling water.
"Hey, guys!" Chan called out, his voice laced with anticipation. "We're finally here!"
"About time!" Felix exclaimed, grinning. "We've been waiting to splash you two."
You laughed and nudged Chan playfully. "Looks like we're in for a wild day."
Minho, armed with a water gun, approached you with a mischievous glint in his eyes. "Chan, Y/N, are you ready for the ultimate water fight?"
Chan smirked and put his arm around you protectively. "Bring it on, Minho. We're ready to take you down!"
With those words, chaos erupted. Water balloons flew through the air, splashing against bodies and causing shrieks of delight.
"Duck!" Changbin shouted, lobbing a water balloon at you.
You managed to dodge it, but it burst against Chan's chest, drenching him.
"Hey!" Chan protested, his eyes widening playfully. "You'll pay for that, Changbin!"
Giggling, you snatched a water gun from the poolside and aimed it at Changbin. "Don't worry, Chan. I'll avenge you!"
As the water fight escalated, Hyunjin emerged from behind the palm trees, holding a tray of colorful ice pops.
"Who's up for a refreshing treat?" Hyunjin asked, his eyes scanning the group.
"I am!" you exclaimed, holding out your hand eagerly.
Hyunjin handed you a strawberry-flavored ice pop, his fingers brushing against yours briefly. "Enjoy, Y/N. You deserve it."
"Thanks, Hyunjin!" you replied, taking a bite. "This is amazing!"
Chan, his attention diverted by the ice pops, made his way over to you. "I want one too!"
Hyunjin grinned mischievously. "Sure, but you have to catch it!"
Chan's eyes widened as Hyunjin tossed the ice pop high into the air. With lightning-fast reflexes, Chan leaped, catching it skillfully before it could hit the ground.
The group erupted in applause, cheering for Chan's impressive catch.
"You never fail to impress, Chan!" Jisung exclaimed, clapping him on the back.
Chan blushed, handing the ice pop to you. "For you, my hero."
You smiled, taking a bite and savoring the sweet taste. "Thank you, Chan. You're my hero too."
After enjoying the ice pops, the group returned to the pool, laughter still lingering in the air. Unbeknownst to the boys, you harbored a fear of deep water, a secret you had yet to share.
As a playful joke, some of the boys, including Changbin and Minho, grabbed you and tossed you into the pool. The moment you hit the water, panic consumed you. Fear clenched your heart, and you struggled to keep your head above the surface.
"Y/N!" Chan's voice rang out with concern as he dove into the water after you. He swam swiftly towards you, his eyes filled with worry.
Frantically, you flailed your arms, gasping for air. "Chan, I can't… I can't swim! Help!"
Chan's arms wrapped around you, pulling you close to his chest. "Shh, it's okay, Y/N. I've got you. Just hold on to me."
Tears streamed down your face as you clung tightly to Chan, his reassuring presence calming your racing heart.
"I'm so sorry, Y/N," Felix's voice trembled with regret. "We had no idea you were scared. We were just playing around."
Minho and Changbin nodded, their expressions filled with remorse. "Yeah, we didn't mean to frighten you."
You took a deep breath, your trembling subsiding. "It's okay, guys. I should've told you about my fear. Let's just laugh it off now."
Chan gently stroked your hair, his touch soothing. "You're so brave, Y/N. I'm proud of you for staying strong."
You managed a small smile, the fear gradually dissipating. "Thanks, Chan. I have you to thank for being my hero again."
The boys surrounded you, apologizing once more and promising to be more mindful in the future.
As the evening sun cast a warm glow over the pool, you found solace in Chan's arms, cuddled up against his chest. He continued to stroke your hair tenderly, his voice filled with affection.
"I'll always be here to protect you, Y/N. You mean the world to me, and your happiness and safety are my top priority."
You snuggled closer, feeling the love radiating from him. "I'm so lucky to have you, Chan. Thank you for being my rock."
Chan pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead, his voice filled with warmth. "Anytime, my love. Let's make more beautiful memories together, filled with laughter and joy."
And at that moment, surrounded by the sounds of your friends' laughter and the comforting embrace of your boyfriend, you knew that even in the face of fear, love had the power to heal and bring you strength.
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blu-joons · 2 years
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BEST FRIEND VICTON A⇴Z HEADCANON ⇴ Heo Chan
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A ⇴ ATTENTION
He liked to pay attention to you, but Chan would always deny paying any attention to you when he got caught out. Everyone always knew when he was though as he had a shy smile plastered on his face.
B ⇴ BICKER
You constantly laughed with each other, and you constantly bickered too. You annoyed each other more than you annoyed anyone else in the world, and you knew exactly how to start getting digs in with one another until you were both talking absolute nonsense back across at one another whilst bickering.
C ⇴ COMFORT
If there’s one thing that you’re pretty reliant on Chan for, it’s the fact that he always knows exactly how to cheer you up. He knows exactly what works, whether it’s him trying to make you smile or him just sitting there for a little while and listening to you, if there’s one thing for sure, it’s that he’ll cheer you up again.
D ⇴ DISAGREEMENTS
Both of you didn’t like disagreements, you both worked hard to avoid those sorts of situations. Chan especially liked for there to be peace between you both, and so when he felt as if an argument was coming, he’d do everything that he could to stop it from happening. He would change the subject, go silent, trying and find something else to get your attention, whatever he could to stop tension brewing.
E ⇴ EARLY YEARS
Neither of you could really remember the start of your friendship because you were so young. It was one of your favourite things to do together, try and guess what the first thing that you said to each other would have been, or predict what qualities in one another would have drawn you two together to start your friendship knowing that you’d never actually get the answers that you were searching for.
F ⇴ FAMILY
Chan’s family were huge fans of yours, they loved having you around with them whenever Chan visited them. Parties, celebrations, special events, you got an invite to just about everything that his family did as they loved having you around so much. It wasn’t just that either, but his family loved seeing you and Chan together as the way that your friendship worked always left many of them laughing at you.
G ⇴ GETTING TOGETHER
Although the two of you aren’t afraid of going out when you hang out together, you both always make sure to be aware. Most of the time Chan will suggest a spot that he knows that he can usually go to without too many people recognising him, offering to take you over there too so that you don’t have to worry.
H ⇴ HABITS
The two of you had a habit of forgetting about the other people that you were spending time with. You often started in the conversation but then broke off into your own conversation instead, only realising what was happening when the rest of the table went silent and the two of you were still chatting.
I ⇴ INSIDE JOKES
Neither of you had a clue as to how many inside jokes you actually had together, you lost count many years ago. You were constantly remembering old inside jokes that you thought you’d forgotten or trying to forget some of the inside jokes that were remembered at either one of your expenses.
J ⇴ JEALOUSY
If anything, you find yourself getting jealous quite a lot of the time at how well your friends get along with Chan. Whilst you don’t want a divide between them, you can’t help but sometimes feel stunned by how much effort he puts in with all of them to impress them. Chan never leaves any of them out when he hangs out with them through you and tries to make as many of them feel as comfortable with him as possible.
K ⇴ KICKS
Chan got a kick out of making you laugh; he didn’t need much to get a boost from you. He prided himself on knowing the exact right to make you smile and hoped that no one else could make you laugh as much as he could, as long as he heard you laughing or saw you smiling, that was all that mattered to him.
L ⇴ LOVE
He loved how close the two of you were, Chan was pretty much always by your side, very rarely being more than an arm’s length away. He loved being around you, finding out the things that you were doing and watching you hard at work too. Some liked to argue that Chan was obsessed with you, but he much preferred to see it as him just caring about you and taking as much of an interest as possible in you too.
M ⇴ MEETING
The two of you first met when you were at school, but that was all that either of you could really remember. Your days at school felt like a bit of a blur for you both, one day you just remembered talking to each other, and the next thing that you knew, you found yourselves where you were today.
N ⇴ NONSENSE
Most people know him for his enthusiasm and setting the mood, but you’re one of only a handful of people that really know Chan’s nonsense side, the side that is just Chan the person rather than Chan the idol.
O ⇴ OBSESSION
Chan was obsessed with your laughter, he loved being the person to brighten up your day, even if it was just a tiny little bit, or make you laugh even more than you already were when you already wore your smile.
P ⇴ PRECIOUS MOMENTS
Being able to see you and celebrate his or your success together were the moments that meant the most to Chan. He loved the two of you doing well, whether it was something huge or something small, Chan used to as an excuse to celebrate with you and hang out with you too when you’d both been pretty busy.
Q ⇴ QUESTIONS
He’ll talk to you constantly, and so Chan is often asking you questions just to keep the conversation going. He doesn’t care how random it is, or how boring you might find it too, Chan will carry on chatting and asking anyway.
R ⇴ RANDOM FACTS
One of the things that Chan likes to do is teach you the killing points of the group’s songs so that you can dance at their concerts. No matter how many times you’d tell him that you knew the steps, Chan would teach you anyway to make sure that you had it spot on and to let you show off at his concerts too.
S ⇴ SUPPORT
Being able to see you supporting him almost meant a lot to Chan, if he wasn’t smiling already, he definitely would be knowing that you were there and cheering him on. He liked to think that he was your biggest fan, and so it always meant a lot to him knowing that you were his biggest fan at the same time too.
T ⇴ TRIPS
One of his favourite things to do is drive to your place and head out somewhere together. You often explore around the city, finding quiet spots that are left undiscovered by most people that you can escape to.
U ⇴ ULTIMATE
He knew how lucky he was to be able to carry you his best friend, having you around was something that Chan never took for granted.
V ⇴ VISITS
There was a smile like no other on Chan’s face whenever you surprised him at work. He loved knowing that you cared enough to see what he was doing, and he also loved being able to show off to you too.
W ⇴ WISDOM
He tried to cheer you up first and foremost whenever Chan gave you advice, that was always his priority with you.
X ⇴ XXXX
If the situation calls for a little bit of affection between the two of you, then Chan won’t be afraid to either give you a hug, or sometimes just give you a nudge to let you know that he’s right there beside you.
Y ⇴ YOU
You were his constant; Chan couldn’t really remember not having you around.
Z ⇴ ZZZ
Most if the time Chan will stay at your place when the two of you hang out as it’s a lot quieter than the dorm is, not to mention that they all sleep a lot better too without you two around making plenty of noise.
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Masterlist
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ihave-atummyache · 1 month
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skz jealous texts <3
18++ nothing exactly explicit but there is implications!!!
ot8
Bang Chan:
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Lee Know:
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Changbin:
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Hyunjin:
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Han:
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Felix:
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Seungmin:
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I.N:
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FREE BONUS IS THE PICTURE I USED FOR IN’S PROFILE PICTURE BC OMGOMGOMH HOW HAVE I NEVER SEEN THUS?!?!!?
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like he’s so pretty i wanna ran my head into a wall lol
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hannieehaee · 11 days
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DOES HE KNOW ?
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18+ / mdi
summary: after being friends with lee chan for a good portion of your life, the boy you considered nothing but your best friend suddenly starts acting different, making you slowly fall for him. problem is, you have a boyfriend.
content: friends2lovers!chan, reader has a bf, almost cheating but not actually, afab reader, smut, oral (f receiving), wet dream (this is actually a huge point in the plot lol), masturbation (f receiving), dry humping, more oral (f receiving), penetrative sex, etc.
wc: 9.8k
a/n: rewrote this so many times but finally finished it!! i love writing channie so i hope u guys enjoy<3
masterlist | kofi/patreon
support me through a one time tip<3
Something was clearly wrong with you.
Was Lee Chan hot?
Nothing made sense anymore, and it had been the case for a while.
You could date it back to a little over a month ago, at one of Soonyoung's usual gatherings. This had been where it all began, or more so, where it all ended.
For some reason unknown to man, that was the day in which Chan began courting you (his words, not yours).
After years of a solid friendship between the two of you, a not-so tipsy Chan cornered you at aforementioned party and began dancing with you. This was a common occurrence between the two of you. Despite having been taken for the past few months, you were still quite liberal about your touchy relationship with your best friend. However, what happened next what was truly out of the ordinary.
"Hey," he had whispered against your ear.
"Yeah?", you giggled, entertained by the boy.
"Wanna know a secret?"
"Sure."
"I've never wanted anyone as much as I want you," and with that, the dam had broken.
You froze against his arms, eyes widening. Though he could not see, as you were holding each other far too close to make eye contact.
Maybe he was drunk?
He interrupted you before you could respond. Chan pulled away from you to look into your eyes with a fully sober look in his face.
"I'm not drunk, and I know you have a boyfriend. And I know you only see me as a friend. But give me a few weeks, and I'll change both those things," was the last thing he said before giving you a peck on the cheek (yet another common thing in your relationship) and walking away with a confident sway in his step.
Ever since then, you had been bombarded by romantic gestures from your former best friend – former because you truly had no idea how you felt about him by this point.
Chan bought you flowers, – even when it was raining – had your favorite beverage at hand any time you so happened to see him, tied your shoelaces should they ever come undone, plucked loose eyelashes from your cheeks, tucked your hair behind your ear, placed his hand at the small of your back before crossing a street, walked you to and from home, looked at you with an indescribable sweetness in his eye, he ... He did everything any girl would need to be completely swooned (and then some).
You were beyond confused as to when this change had come about. As far as you knew, you were nothing more than best friends. When had Chan even begun liking you? What had changed?
"Oh. He's always had a thing for you," was what your mutual friend Soonyoung said when you first brought it up.
"What do you mean? We've been friends for years, he's never-"
"Yeah, duh. You never showed interest, what was he supposed to do? But yeah, he's crazy about you," added Seungkwan, sipping his drink nonchalantly.
You had decided to meet up with some of your mutual friends while Chan was at work. You needed at least five minutes with your other friends without Chan getting in the way with his flirting.
"It's kinda sick, actually," interjected Soonyoung once more.
You remained quiet for a while, thinking back to every interaction you'd ever had with Chan that may have revealed his feelings for you. Unfortunately, you kept drawing blanks all the while Soonyoung stole fries from your plate, disregarding your confusion at the situation.
"But why now?", you finally asked, slapping his meddling hand away from your food.
He shrugged, "Maybe he got fed up of watching you with that guy."
"He has a name, Soonyou-"
"None of us really care enough to learn it."
That much was true. None of your friends were fans of your current boyfriend. Or of any of them, to be quite frank. You had certain lack of skill at picking them, though this time around you felt confident about your current relationship. He was nice and respectful. Maybe a little bit of a square, but you liked to think you brought out the fun in him. This was also the longest relationship you'd ever had, giving you the grand total of three months in a exclusive relationship and a month and a half of a very prolonged talking stage that took place before he ever asked you out officially.
"Is this because I've been taken for longer than usual?", you tried to assert.
"Oh! That might be it, huh?", Soonyoung agreed.
"Well, I guess he didn't want you to break your streak of failed relationships," chuckled Kwan.
With a slap to his chest, you dropped the subject, deciding to ignore the slight acceleration of your heart any time you thought about Chan's crush for too long.
At first you found it to be a bit of a joke, but his affections quickly began to wear you down. It also didn't help how blatant he was about it, constantly flirting up a storm around your friends, not caring for their amused smiles at your flustered half-rejections of his advances. The only times in which he held back were the rare occasions in which your boyfriend would join your friend group in their outings. He could be reserved at times, not really clicking with your loud friends, so his presence was not a common thing.
Being honest, you felt kind of bad at the genuine excitement Chan's crush gave you. Though you weren't sure of your feelings for him at this point, his interest flustered you tremendously. You'd always known him as a pretty and charming guy, despite never really acknowledging such things. You understood why he got so much attention from girls, though you never thought too much of it. He was your best friend, you never had any motive to consider anything further than platonic feelings for him. But now that you were questioning your feelings, you felt as if you were kind of betraying your boyfriend.
Not to misunderstand, you had no desire of pursuing anything with anyone while you were in a committed relationship. You were just not that kind of person. But the mere thought of blushing at the words of a guy who wasn't yours (all while actually having a guy of your own) made you feel ashamed. Specially considering that you already had a very grand preexisting fondness for the guy in question.
God damn you, Lee Chan.
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"So, when are you gonna drop this game and finally let me take you to bed?", he whispered cockily against your ear.
He was always so goddamn confident about it; a trait you always liked about him but were beginning to detest.
As per usual, you simply jokingly groaned at him and pushed him away in a manner far too light to be considered serious.
"Fuck off, Lee Chan."
With a giggle, he stepped away, usual pep in his step as present as ever.
"I'll get you another drink, 'kay, pretty?", you lost him in the crowd after that.
You'd gone drinking with your friends yet again, though this time at a distant friend's house party. Your boyfriend was absent once more due to his personal disdain for such outings. He was simply not much of a social drinker, which was fine! It just bothered you at times how often he chose staying in rather than going out with you.
Despite your rejections of Chan, you felt embarrassed to admit that you loved the thrill of his interest in you. Never had you ever had someone so shamelessly after your affections despite your lighthearted refusals. It made you feel wanted and powerful. It felt specially good when it came from a guy as handsome and charismatic as Chan; a guy who could have basically any girl all thanks to his unbelievable charisma.
Yet he wanted you. He was after you.
The guy you knew most was currently infatuated with you.
Yeah, you did need that second drink.
"Where's your guy?"
Your thoughts were interrupted by a familiar voice coming from behind you.
You turned around to find Vernon leaning back against the wall, a smirk on his face at having watched your encounter with Chan.
"Shut up," you walked over to recline on the wall next to him, deciding to people-watch alongside him.
"It was a genuine question," he claimed, handing you a sip of the beer he'd been nursing.
"He's working again," you sipped, handing it back to take turns as you waited for Chan to bring you your drink of choice.
"And Channie?"
"What about him?"
"Does your boyfriend know?", he asks, more curious than actually interested.
Men, nosy as usual.
You groan, "Don't ask me that, Non."
"C'mon! Has he not noticed the way Chan's been after you these past few weeks?", he seemed far too entertained by the subject.
"Of course not! Chan's kept his distance around him, but ..."
"But?"
You turned your head to him, back still leaning against the wall, "I don't know!"
"Well, do you like him? Channie, I mean."
"It's- I like the attention."
"And him?", he pressed.
"He's starting to wear me down," you admitted.
Vernon chuckled into his red solo cup, "It's cute."
"What is?"
"The back and forth, the 'will they, won't they.' But if you ask me, I think they will."
"I have a boyfriend, Non," you grumbled, not entirely convincing in your tone.
"Yeah, but are you guys even friends? Wouldn't it be better to date someone who you actually like?"
"Stop doing PR for Chan. It's not like he needs it," you grumbled, already uses to this back and forth with many of your other friends – all of whom were rooting for Chan.
"Fine. But get out of here. Your guy's probably looking for you."
"My guy's not here."
"I meant Channie, now go!"
You grumbled again before walking in the direction in which Chan had left, knowing he'd likely still be in the kitchen attempting to fetch you a drink.
It didn't take you long to find him, nor did it take you long to spot the girl standing next to him, seemingly flirting up a storm. Chan didn't seem too deterred by this either. More than anything, he appeared to he reciprocating.
Maybe this was why you and Chan started off as friends and remained so for the years you'd known each other. He always had a girl clinging onto him one way or another. Though he didn't date much, he sure enjoyed swooning girls whenever he could.
You'd always been very strict about being exclusive with whoever you dated, never wanting to compete for someone's attention or engage in prolonged talking stages. This was something you differed in with Chan. He was quite the opposite, engaging in situationships that never really led anywhere. As his friend, you never really cared much for this. If it worked for him, then that was that. However, now that he was supposedly attempting to pursue you, – despite you being in a relationship – you couldn't help but scoff at the sight of Chan still entertaining any girl that'd show interest in him.
You almost turned around and left, but were promptly stopped by the man himself, who spotted you before you could take one step and disregarded the girl immediately. The girl scoffed in your place, clearly put off by Chan's attention being taken away so easily.
"Babe!", he called out, one drink in each hand, as he approached you, "Sorry I took so long, the line was crazy."
Immaturely enough, you rolled your eyes and grabbed the drink from his hand, ignoring his statement as you sipped it. You really had no right to be jealous of Chan talking to other girls. You were taken, and you weren't even interested in Chan. Were you? Still, you disregarded those thoughts and allowed the bitterness to cloud your mind and began walking away from the boy.
"Huh?", a question mark physically manifested itself above Chan's head as you began walking away from him, "Baby? Wait, where are you going?", his arm managed to reach you before you got far enough and softly turned you around to face him.
The two of you were still standing far too close to the people crowding the kitchen, however, so Chan assessed that it'd be better to move to a quieter spot in order to properly check in on you. With a decisive nod to himself, he grabbed onto your hand and walked you over to an empty hallway before turning to you again.
"What's wrong? Did something happen while I was gone? Did someone-"
The concern in his eyes seemed very genuine, making you feel bad for being such a brat at the mere sight of Chan interacting with another woman. You had never had an issue with your best friend being around other women. Hell, you never even cared whenever he would occasionally ditch you for other girls. The two of you were simply best friends. You had always rooted for him in his romantic life, even encouraging him with it.
But things had drastically changed as soon as he began showing interest in you.
It was like his sudden interest had unlocked a part of you you hadn't known was there. It had given you this brand new possessiveness you had never held over Chan before; a possessiveness you didn't even feel for your current boyfriend.
And it made you feel embarrassed. Tremendously so. It also made you feel like a hypocrite. Here you had a guy who was clearly extremely into you, yet he had made no comment nor expressed any disdain over the fact that you already had a guy. Chan had never expressed any type of jealousy over any of your past relationships. Despite having liked you for the entire duration of your friendship (information you were unsure Chan was aware you knew), Chan always respected your relationships and even tried to befriend any guy you brought along. Yet you couldn't hold back your bitterness at him showing interest in someone else; interest you now felt should be reserved only for you.
The hypocritical nature of your feelings made you look down in embarrassment as you interrupted Chan's inquiries, clarifying that nothing was wrong.
"No, Chan. I'm fine, I swear. Just a little tired. I, uh, thanks for the drink."
"Hey, are you sure?", he lifted your face with a finger to your chin, making you hold eye contact with him.
It was quite insane how this was not even meant as a flirtatious move, but rather a demonstration of his platonic worry for you. Yet your heart sped up anyways.
"I'm fine, Chan! It's just the crowds. You know how I get. Nonnie told me to go look for you and there were so many people in the kitchen, and then I couldn't come up to you because of that girl and-"
Your rambles were interrupted by an exclamation mark practically manifesting itself above Chan's head, with the sudden realization of your jealousy hitting him.
"Oh?", he tilted his head and leaned in a bit closer as a grin began making its way onto his face, "'That girl'?", he repeated.
"Chan-"
He got closer to you, now cornering you against the hallway wall, still giving you space but blocking your view of anything other than him.
"I'm sorry, baby. Did that bother you? Hmm? Me talking to some other girl?"
"It's not like that! I just-"
"It's okay. You can admit it. I won't judge you," except his smirk was nothing but condescending.
"Chan! I-"
"But that's kinda funny, though. Isn't it?", he chuckled to himself.
"W-what is?," you stammered at his sudden shift in mood.
Though he was still far too close for a friend to be, and he was still leaning into your touch, his tone had shifted to one a bit more cynical in nature.
"You're jealous? Baby, you have a boyfriend."
"I do, and-"
"So what's there to be jealous about? You've got your guy. Yet you're looking my way? When you've been rejecting me all this time?", he leaned even closer, almost breathing right against your nose, eyes hooded as they bore into your own, alternating between your eyes and lips in a somewhat teasing manner.
"I-I'm not jealous. Just ... Why flirt with me if you're after other girls too?", you made the mistake of asking.
"Oh, baby. I'm not looking at anyone else. Not my fault you're so possessive you can't even stand other girls looking at me," you knew he was simply teasing you, knowing full well that you were not the possessive type. But his words carried a slight weight of truth behind them.
You had no reason to feel any type of possessiveness over Chan. Yet you still felt uneasy at the thought of Chan's eyes on anyone who wasn't you. Now that you had a taste of his attention you wanted it all to yourself.
"I just have one question," he whispered, far too close to you.
You nodded at him to continue, wide eyes on his own.
"Does he know?"
"Know what?"
"That you like me back," his eyes went down to your lips again.
"Chan. Stop. I-I'm not gonna cheat on my boyfriend," you huffed, avoiding his eyes – which was quite hard at his close proximity.
The two of you stayed like that for a few moments, with your eyes occasionally dropping to his lips. But it was fine, since his own were also on yours – though his expression was more triumphant than anything, while yours revealed your nerves. Had you been in a less restricting position, your thighs would've instinctively pressed together at the thoughts that were suddenly running through your mind at his proximity, but thankfully the situation didn't drag long enough for your lust to reveal itself.
He finally pulled away, smirk still on his face, "I'd never ask you to do that, baby. 's just nice to know my plan's working," he chuckled.
"What plan?"
"I'm wearing you down. You want me."
Unfortunately, you had no rebuttal, knowing that Chan had won this round. Even if you denied his statement (which you had half the mind to do), he had caught you red handed. You had whined about not having his full attention just like a petulant child would. Nothing you said would save you from that.
You managed to move on from that quite quickly, finding Soonyoung and Kwannie just a few moments later and using them as an excuse to move on from the way in which Chan had cornered you. You spent the rest of the party pondering Chan's words. Did you actually want him? Or was it just that you wanted him to want you?
Now you were stuck with embarrassing moisture between your thighs and countless doubts hanging over your head.
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"C-Channie! Oh, Channie, fuck!"
Your cries of pleasure were unparalleled as the pretty boy you liked to call your best friend slurped at your cunt like a starved man.
You weren't sure how long he had been at it, nor were you sure how you'd ended up in this situation, but you had no complaints. His tongue between your thighs was pure heaven, especially with the pathetic whines the boy kept letting out at your taste.
"'sso good, princess. Cunt's so tasty ... Been wanting it since I met you ... Been waiting for you for years," he mumbled against your cunt, getting back to licking and sucking immediately.
While your heart was unsure what to make of such a heavy statement, your body responded with desperation. To have a man yearn for you like that for years was doing wonders for your cunt. It made you gush like crazy, beginning to grind against Chan's face in such a depraved way.
"Just like that, fuck. Fuck my face just like that," he groaned, the vibrations of his voice causing you to grind even harder against him.
"C-Channie! It's so good ... So fucking good, oh!"
He seemed to get off on your praise, you realized, as you felt ruckus on the bed beneath you caused by Chan canting his hips against your mattress and moaning incessantly into your cunt. The knowledge of your taste alone making Chan lose himself in such a way was enough to drive you towards your high, getting closer and closer by the second.
"Gonna make me cum, princess. Got such a pretty fucking pussy," he managed to breathe out despite exerting all his efforts into fucking the mattress.
Surprising to no one, Chan claimed your orgasm on his tongue just moments later, somehow managing to talk you through it and make the experience even more swoon-worthy than it already was. Chan had managed to make you feel a way no one had ever before, making you ache for him with just his words.
It had all ended far sooner than you would've liked, but it was fine. You knew that with a few kisses to his ear Chan would give you whatever you wanted without question.
Yet before you could even get to enjoy the entirety of your high, it was abruptly taken from you the moment your alarm began ringing, awakening you from what you hadn't realized was just slumber.
Waking up from a wet dream was already embarrassing enough on its own, but waking up from a wet dream about your best friend whom you swore you weren't into like that was a new level of low.
As much as you tried to brush it off as some sort of fluke or meaningless dream, you knew better. You had never thought of Chan in such a way, much less imagined him in that context, so it was safe to say that Chan had been right. His plan was working.
~
The following hours were spent on alert (and still incredibly horny). You thought about calling up your boyfriend to help you out, but the thought in itself felt dirty. How could you ask your boyfriend to take care of a problem caused by your best friend? There was that, and the fact that your brain would probably not be satisfied by your boyfriend right now.
You needed to get Chan out of your system.
You knew that if you called up Chan and explained your problem to him he'd come running immediately, no questions asked as he helped you relive your dream. Such a thought had your head spinning and your knees feeling weak. Except you had a moral compass that was preventing you from doing so. So, you spent the next few hours extremely sensitive and attempting to take care of yourself in any way you could think of.
Unfortunately nothing compared to your dream. Nothing felt as warm and loving as Chan had felt. There was not a single thing that could bring back that feeling of want Chan had towards you; a feeling you were so desperate for. This led you to spend the rest of the day sexually frustrated, unable to reach your high as you felt something was thoroughly missing.
Even when your boyfriend stopped by to see you after work, things had gone awry. You'd received him at the door in a desperate manner, dragging him in with you and inciting him into fucking you. You didn't care if you had Chan in mind anymore, you just needed some satisfying release. Sadly, your boyfriend did not match your energy, opting to slow you down and have his way with you in his own way. This led to yet another unsatisfying release to add to today's tally. You were unsure if you could even call it a release, as it felt entirely underwhelming and had been mostly accomplished by your own hand.
Going to sleep, still sexually frustrated, you cursed at yourself for letting Lee Chan get in your head.
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Spending time with Chan after your incident was nothing less than incredibly awkward.
Despite Chan being fully unaware of what had gone down in your subconscious, you couldn't help the blush that would take over your face any time the two of you made eye contact. He had all the power at the moment.
You had also made the mistake of discussing the occurrence with your closest friends, Seungkwan and Soonyoung. Purposely, you had not mentioned the name of the culprit behind your wet dream, but it had not been hard for your nosy friends to figure it out on their own.
"You had a sex dream about Channie?!", Soonyoung had all but whispered, causing some old ladies across the diner to look your way in judgment.
Fortunately not too many people were present at the diner you were currently hanging out at, but it didn't really help the embarrassment you felt at the words even being uttered. This was the only time in which you could see your friends without Chan's presence, so you couldn't be too picky about the setting.
"Soonyoung! Shut the hell up!", you whisper-shouted at him, throwing a rolled up napkin at him in punishment, "I never said it was about Chan."
"Please. Who else would it be about? Sure as hell can't be about your vanilla boyfriend. And anyone else like Mingyu or Wonwoo would be too obvious for you to be so embarrassed about it. It has to be Chan," Seungkwan butted in nonchalantly.
"I- It's- my boyfriend is not vanilla!"
"You didn't deny it! It was Channie!", Soonyoung was far too excited at having guessed correctly.
Giving up, and knowing you needed some external input on your predicament, you nodded in shame, admitting to your sin in order to maybe get some advice on the situation.
"What do I do? I ... I can't stop thinking about it. Fuck, I can't even look at Chan in the eye anymore."
"Was it good?"
"Soonyoung, stop! That's not the point."
"He has a point. Not really worth ruining your relationship over some mediocre head," argued Seungkwan.
"Shut up! It- Fuck, it was so good," you groaned into your hands in utter embarrassment.
"Dude I knew Chan would be good at head. It's in his eyes. I'm telling you, people with those big doe eyes are freaks in bed," Soonyoung couldn't seem to stop spewing his headcanon of Chan at you.
"Or at least dream-Chan is," agreed Kwan.
"What do I do?! It won't leave my mind. I- I've already tried fucking it out of my head, but even then-"
"Hold on. You had sex with your boyfriend while thinking about Chan? Does he know?"
"Soonyoung!"
"Man, he'd pass out if he heard that. Do you know how many time's he's walked us through his sex dreams?", cackled Soonyoung.
This obviously caught your attention, making you widen your eyes and fastening the speed of your heartbeat.
Chan had had sex dreams about you too?
I mean, it should've been obvious considering the amount of dirty innuendos and straight-up proposals he's given you these past few weeks, but you had never actually thought about it in depth.
Fuck.
Chan wanted to fuck you.
The thought made you gulp and press your thighs together, actions your friends thankfully did not catch onto.
"He, uh, he's told you about his sex dreams about me?", you asked with a complete lack of confidence in your voice.
"God, don't even get him started," grumbled Seungkwan, slurping his almost empty americano before continuing, "It's Hoshi who keeps instigating him into telling us every excruciating detail."
Soonyoung nodded in confirmation, "Dude, he gets nasty," he whispers as if it was a sin to utter out loud – despite having previously aired your own sex dream to the whole diner.
God, were you interested in knowing more. But you couldn't blow your cover. You were far too horny and pent up already. Hearing about how your sexy (yes, you were at the point of shamelessly admitting it) best friend giving it to you in the nastiest scenarios imaginable would probably make you combust in front of your best friends and every other unsuspecting person in the establishment.
With dry lips and wetness already gathering between your thighs, you simply hummed in acknowledgment and moved on with the conversation, eventually managing to change subjects without giving away your cover.
~
Never in your life had you ever had such urgency in getting home.
Upon locking your front door, you immediately ran to your bed, undressing yourself in the process and getting ready to rid yourself of the ache between your legs that had been bothering you since that wretched dream.
You knew that you wouldn't be able to satisfy yourself as well as you wanted without Chan's aid (you'd tried endless times just a few days ago), but trying was better than nothing.
Getting yourself started was easy. All you had to do was remember the very vivid image of dream-Chan slobbering between your legs, begging you to use his face however you saw fit and claim your orgasm as if it were a god-given right.
But imagination wasn't enough.
You had half the mind to call up Chan right there and then and crying to him to please come and take care of you. The repeated knowledge that Chan would likely come to you with no question nor judgement made the task of holding back even harder. It made you cry at the frustration your fingers were giving you; they just weren't enough. Not even after the endless attempts these past few days had you been able to calm the fire between your legs. The last time you saw your boyfriend – just after your damned sex dream – had been yet another failed attempt. It seemed like nothing could truly get you there.
That's when you thought of the perfect thing.
Chan always had the tendency of either taking you home himself or sending you a short voice message to ensure you had arrived home safely – always insisting on one in return. This message always contained Chan's raspy voice after a long day of shenanigans, usually calling you one pet name or another as he checked in on you.
No matter how ashamed you felt at it, the burning between your legs did seem to diminish upon turning up the short voice message he had left you just last week. His words, accompanied by his voice, did wonders for your imagination.
"Hey, babe", it had started, "Just wanted to check in on you and make sure you got home okay. Need you to send me a message back as soon as you can, yeah?"
This had been enough to start you up again, the usual 'babe' nickname and the soft command causing an effect on you it never had in all your years of friendship.
"You looked so pretty today," he sighed, "Did I tell you that? Need to be telling you that every day. You're gorgeous. Don't even know how such a pretty girl puts up with us," he chuckled.
Oh, Channie ...
He'd always been so sweet to you. Such a fun friend, but also such a sweet boy who'd always coddle you and treat you better than anyone else. You could almost picture him swooning at you as he reminisced on the pretty dress you'd worn that day.
You couldn't think of anyone else who thought of you that fondly. Yet you were currently too busy using an unsuspecting Chan to get off after days of being pent up due to that same boy.
"Miss you already, gorgeous. Should've taken you home myself, ugh," he groaned at himself, "That way I would've at least gotten a goodnight kiss," he paused, chuckling, "on the cheek, of course."
It was probably just your horny brain talking, but had Chan been in front of you at that moment, you would've done far more than just kiss him. You didn't know where all this sudden lust for Chan had come from, but that dream had come with an epiphany. Maybe you'd been attracted to your best friend all this time.
"'Kay, Imma leave you now, okay, princess? Message me back when you're ready for bed, alright? You know how I worry. Goodnight, beautiful. I love you," he ended the recording with a soft kiss.
The short voice message wasn't enough to work yourself up to an orgasm, so you revisited as many of his old messages as you could, recalling some specially soft ones he'd send you where he'd call you all the petnames known to man and praise you enough to make you blush.
You also thought about what Soonyoung had said, how Chan's dreams about you would get nasty. You thought of every nasty thing the man was probably itching to do to you. You thought of how easily you'd let him if he was here at this moment.
Throughout it all, you pictured Chan and the actions that would accompany his words if he were in the room with you. You imagined the soft touches and the praise he'd spew endlessly at you. The eyes full of genuine love – mixed with a little lust – that would watch you as you came undone.
And come undone you did. It wasn't as good as it would've been with the real Chan present and taking care of you, but it sure beat the multiple unsatisfying orgasms you'd had in the past few days.
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"We broke up."
Those were your opening words upon approaching the usual table you shared with your friends.
This time Seokmin had decided to join.
"You what?"
"Because of Chan?"
"Really?!"
All responses were delivered simultaneously, making you groan as you sat down, knowing you were in for a lengthy interrogation from the three nosiest men you knew.
You covered your face in your hands and exhaled before unmasking yourself and facing your friends with seriousness in your demeanor.
"Didn't feel right when I kept thinking about Chan," you started, "He understood, which made it worse. Said he'd been too busy with work lately, was thinking of taking some time apart anyways."
It had been a few days since your wet dream about Chan. After your lonely escapade the night after – the night with the cursed voice memos – you had gone over to your boyfriend's place to end it. You hadn't hung out much in the past few weeks. There had been no spark for a bit. The goodness of your short-lived relationship was probably just the honeymoon period, which ended around the same time Chan decided to make his interest on you known.
It was all too much to deal with, so breaking it off seemed easier.
"Wow," aired Soonyoung.
"Yeah. Wow. How are you feeling?", asked Seokmin.
"I'm fine. Just, you know, feel kinda bad. I didn't want to be with someone if my heart wasn't fully in it," you mumbled, a little solemn.
"Does Channie know?"
"God, no. I've been avoiding him since," you eyed Kwan and Soonyoung, "uh, you know," you didn't want Seokmin to be yet another one of your friends to know about your sexual escapades in your slumber.
"Oh, you mean the sex dream?"
Your stare turned menacing, facing the only two possible culprits, "Who told him?"
"It was Soonie!", Seungkwan revealed immediately.
"Wait! No, I-"
"Did you tell anyone else? Oh my god, does Chan know?!"
"No! I only told Seokmin, I swear! He asked why we were meeting while Chan's working, so I told him."
"Don't worry, I won't tell. Scout's honor."
Seokmin held an innocent pinky towards you. Already done with the situation, you halfheartedly intertwined pinkies and moved on.
"So ... Channie?", Seungkwan asked once more.
"What about him?", you feigned curiosity.
"Playing dumb isn't gonna help things."
"What, do you want me to tell him about my dream?"
"That'd be kinda weird, man, I don't know," added Seokmin.
"I think it'd be hot."
"Soonyoung, shut up!", you told him for the nth time since the subject of your 'crush' on Chan had first come up.
Seungkwan side-eyed them before continuing, "No, but you like him, don't you?"
Did you? Did you actually like Chan?
Before Chan had showed interest in you, you had never considered it. Ever since you'd met him, Chan had always been nothing more than your best friend, your partner in crime. You had never felt as safe and comfortable with anyone as you had with Chan, and that was still the case. No boyfriend had ever made you feel as at ease as Chan always did.
His crush had brought out something in you. Had it been any other friend who suddenly revealed their feelings for you, you would've reacted in horror. But it was different with Chan. For some reason, you didn't feel put off by it, nor did you try to chase him away for his feelings for you. It wasn't one of those situations where the boy suddenly decides to pursue his girl-friend and ruins the friendship altogether. This had opened pandora's box for you, making you realize that Chan's affections would've always been welcomed by you.
Even if you jokingly rejected him or told your friends you had a boyfriend, it was all simply due to your moral compass. You weren't a cheater, so you couldn't take Chan too seriously even if you wanted to. But now you were single, and now you had to figure out if you really wanted Chan in the same way he wanted you.
"I know that I want him, but I need to make sure that I want him, you know? I'd never want to hurt his feelings or jeopardize our friendship just because I was horny one day."
"So you're scared it might just be that you're sexually attracted to him?"
"No, it's just ..."
"You want to know whether or not you like him and not just the attention he gives you."
It was surprisingly Soonyoung who had deciphered it.
"Y-yeah. Fuck. Does that make me a narcissist?"
"Nah. It's better to be sure. You've been friends with Channie since forever. It makes sense for you to wanna be cautious."
"You should probably stop avoiding him, though. He's, uh, starting to notice," revealed Seokmin.
"Yeah, he won't stop whining. Just put him out of his misery already," said Soonie.
"Okay, I guess I'll talk to him next time I see him."
You didn't really feel ready for it, but the time to confront Chan would have to come sooner or later.
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Next time you saw Chan was actually far too soon for your liking. Just the following day you found yourself at yet another house party; a small gathering among your friend group and some other people. It wasn't anything too big, so you knew that you'd inevitably bump into Chan.
It had only been about a week since you last spoke to Chan, but that had been a week too long. Throughout the duration of your friendship, the longest you ever went without constant communication had been three days, which had been a total accident on both your parts. The two of you would at least text once a day, even coming to have an unbroken streak of endless texts.
Fuck, you missed him.
Chan obviously must've noticed your lack of communication these past few days. You weren't even sure why you had decided to keep him in the dark. It wasn't just the wet dream (which was still haunting you, but had moved to the back burner for now), and it wasn't your breakup either. You were just confused about your feelings for the boy, but punishing him by icing him out had been far too much. Now you felt guilty.
You felt extra guilty when you finally spotted Chan across the party, sitting alone on a loveseat while he attempted but failed at discreetly looking over at you. He looked like a wounded puppy as he did so, pout on his lips and furrowed brows. It made you want to kiss the pout right off his face.
It was easy to tell that he wanted to approach you, but was simply trying his hardest to respect the boundary you had seemingly put up out of nowhere. This meant that you'd have to be the one to talk to him.
Then you took action, throwing away the drink you had been nursing and walking over to him, ignoring his shocked expression when you wordlessly grabbed his hand and pulled him to an empty room in the shared house. You locked the door and turned to him, unsure on what to say first.
Chan was the now the one to surprise you, immediately trapping you in a bear hug and burying his face in your shoulder, loudly breathing you in.
He didn't let go for a couple of minutes, even nudging you to keep hugging him back when you went to pull away.
When he finally let go, you finally had the chance to look at the boy for a moment.
Yeah, you liked him.
You had missed him far too much to be able to deny it.
You liked Lee Chan, and you were ready to let it be known to the world.
But then he started speaking.
"I'm so sorry," he started, utterly confusing you as to what he could be apologizing for, "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable, I, fuck. I must've crossed a line with my flirting, and I never meant to. You're my best friend, and I need to respect you, an-and I need to respect your relationship. I thought that maybe somehow I could get you to see me as more than a friend, but it was stupid of me to assume you'd drop your boyfriend just because your dumb friend suddenly had a crush on you – which, uh, isn't the case, by the way," he looked down, embarrassed, "I've liked you since we met. So much. I assumed Hoshi must've told you by now. Anyways, I, uh, I'm really sorry. I'll stop. I will never bring it up again, just, fuck, please don't be mad. I'll take anything you give me. If friendship is what you want then I'll be the bestest friend you've ever had, just-"
It was impossible to take his senseless rambles anymore. You were getting too emotional at the thought of having put Chan through this turmoil when you had spent the last few days tending to the ache he had caused between your legs and subsequently breaking up with your boyfriend in order to figure out your feelings. It made you feel equally embarrassed and ridiculous, yet the effects of your silence made you begin to tear up at the apologetic boy in front of you.
Interrupting him, you hugged him again, somehow even tighter this time. This thankfully shut him up, allowing his body to lose its tension and letting himself become limp in your hold.
After some more moments of silent hugging, you were the one to pull away this time, giving him a sympathetic smile as you raised a hand to caress his cheek. It made you soon the way in which he leaned against your palm and gave you the sweetest smile known to man.
"Channie, you did nothing wrong ... I'm sorry for cutting you off like that, that was so wrong of me. I should've talked to you and told you how I was feeling. I wish I was half as confident about my feelings as you are, but I just felt so-" you paused, not knowing what you were even trying to express, "a-and then I just started avoiding you to avoid my feelings all together. I'm sorry."
"No, you have nothing to apologize for," he put his hands on your shoulders to ensure you were understanding his point, "I should've respected your boundaries. I never even should've tried to pursue you when I know you have a boyfriend, it was so-"
"had", you clarified, shy.
"what?"
"I had a boyfriend. We, uh, we broke up a few days ago."
"You ... Fuck, was it because of me?"
His eyes were like saucers, but you could see a small hint of a smile that he quickly wiped off when he realized the context of the situation.
"I want to say no, but ... yeah, I did."
Still feeling unbelievably ashamed at the memory of what had first led you to consider breaking up with your boyfriend, – a stupid wet dream you still couldn't get out of your mind – you avoided eye contact. Now you knew that that had only been the catalyst of realizing your feelings for Chan, but it still didn't help matters much, specially knowing that Chan would find out sooner or later.
"God, I'm so so sorry-"
"Chan! Stop apologizing! It wasn't because of anything you did. I just ... I realized some things these past few weeks and .. I realized we weren't really right for each other," you took a breath, "Not when you were all I could think about."
"Y-you ...?"
"I'm going to be candid, okay? Just, please don't interrupt."
He nodded, giving you the green light.
"A little over a week ago, uh, something happened. And then I couldn't keep you out of my mind. I tried talking to the guys, I even tried using my boyfriend as a distraction, but nothing worked. I started avoiding you because I just felt so awkward realizing I was beginning to develop feelings for you. It was wrong of me, but I needed time. I broke up with him because it didn't feel right to be with someone else while you were the only person I wanted around."
Saying it felt like a breath of fresh air. Not only were you admitting it to Chan, but also to yourself. Your friendship with Chan had never been your average friendship. Even before he had decided to begin shamelessly hitting on you, he had always been the sweetest and most caring boy you'd ever met. Sending you voice memos every time you went home alone, always being in charge of getting your drinks, driving you wherever you wanted, being overly affectionate with you any time he felt you might've needed it. The boy had always been the perfect match for you, you just couldn't grasp it until he began to literally shove it in your face.
"What made you realize it?"
Not expecting him to question you, but rather just accept your sudden change of heart, you hadn't thought of how to explain to him that a sex dream was what had brought you to this epiphany.
But what did you have to lose at this point? Most of your friends already knew, and to be quite frank, you still wanted Chan extremely badly. Telling him wouldn't be the end of the world.
"I, uh, I had a dream about you ..." you muttered, eyes avoiding his own.
His already wide eyes widened even more, a smirk forming itself on his features as he tilted his head in question.
"Uhm, care to repeat that for me?"
"Chan, shut the fuck up. You heard me."
"I didn't! Just tell me. Please?"
With a sigh, you repeated yourself, this time a little more clear, "I had a dream about you."
"Uh-huh. What type of dream?"
"Chan!"
"Princess, please. I embarrassed myself for you for weeks. I pined for you for years. Just give me what I wanna hear," he pleaded, somehow cocky in the way he did so.
"Fuck, fine. I had a wet dream about you. I dreamt about you between my legs, giving me the greatest orgasm I've ever experienced and begging me for more. I dreamt of your pathetic whines while I ground my cunt on your face. And then I woke up before I could cum. I spent the entire day trying to get that feeling back but nothing worked, Chan, nothing. I couldn't look you in the eyes after that so I just avoided you."
Finally giving him the most candid version of the events made you feel a weight leave your shoulders, specially upon realizing that the boy who currently held your heart had been rendered unable to use this as ammunition against you as you watched his cocky expression turn into one of lust.
"Oh," he breathed out. Taking a few moments to regain his composure, he spoke up again, "W-was that it? Or do you, uh, do you also like me back?"
"I like you, Chan. So much. The dream was just what made me realize that I wanted you in every way imaginable."
A decisive expression now took over his face, nodding to himself before moving closer to you, taking up all your personal space.
"That's all I needed to know," he declared before claiming your lips in a heated kiss.
Chan kissed you with everything he had to give. The kiss immediately grew lustful, with Chan licking into your mouth for access the second you made the smallest sound of surprise. And, fuck was Chan a great kisser.
His tongue was practically making love to yours, rendering your legs weak and shaky. Thankfully Chan realized this, pushing you to the nearest wall so that he could continue to take over all your senses.
Scratching and pulling at his hair, you caused Chan to moan against your lips, only making you whine in return. Chan took this as a sign to move forward, beginning to grind his expert hips against your own. Already hard, Chan's clothed cock felt like heaven against your burning cunt. You had begged for a proper release for days, and you were now afraid that some light dry humping would be enough to take you there before you could finally relive your dream.
But did you care? Did you care enough to halt Chan's movements when they were already making your eyes roll back? Your body made the decision for you, pushing your hips against his own and making him release a gruttal groan against your lips.
"N-need you so fucking bad ..." he breathed against your lips, barely able to get a word out as you insisted of licking into his mouth as he spoke. This made him groan again, "Princess, please ... You're gonna kill me."
Pulling away, you grabbed his hands and placed them on your breasts, making eyed at him as you spoke, "Channie, just touch me. Don't care what you do, just ... just take care of the problem you caused."
He whined at the feeling of your body at his palms, immediately groping and feeling up every inch of your body before trapping your mouth in another heated kiss. His hands soon became too desperate to feel you through your clothes, carelessly unwrapping you from every piece of clothing he could. He left you in your underwear, having thrown off your dress and holding onto your hands so you could haphazardly kick off your shoes. Chan's clothes joined soon after, with his own hands throwing off all but his boxers.
Before he could claim your lips in a kiss again, you grabbed him by the hand, leading him to a nearby couch in order to sit him down. Sitting on his lap, you kissed him again and again, thoroughly enjoying how liberal his hands were in the way he touched you.
Finally throwing off your bra, you felt up your tits a bit as Chan watched you with a pained look in his face, mouth open and eyes glued to your breasts. His lips attached to your tits immediately after, going crazy in the way he suckled and bit at them.
"You're so fucking gorgeous," he mumbled against your tit, "Fuck, dreamt about you every night ... This pretty body and all your pretty noises. Can't believe I get to have you now," he kissed his way back up to your neck, hands never halting in their caressing of your body.
He pulled away to look into your eyes – though his eyes kept dropping to your lips, "You're embarrassed about your dream?", he chuckled, "Want me to tell you some of mine? Hmm?", he began to manhandle you, positioning you so that you could lay horizontally on the couch and he could lay above you, "So fucking nasty, baby, it'd make you blush."
"Channie ..."
"Gonna do so many nasty things to you. Want me to whine for your pussy? Oh, baby ... Gonna beg for pussy every day, shit," his hand went down to rub your wet cunt through your panties, "'sso wet," he groaned, "Gonna lick it all up again and again. Need to suffocate between these thighs," he made his way down your body as he said this, eventually coming face to face with your cunt.
Leaving a kiss on your weeping cunt, he licked through your panties, causing you to arch your back for him and throw your head back. The warmth of his tongue could've been enough to claim your orgasm, but somehow you persisted.
Chan became desperate for you quickly after that, removing your panties and lifting your thighs so that he could finally bury himself between your legs the way you'd been wanting him to for so long.
"Channie, fuck!," you cried, pulling at his hair while pushing his head further against you.
"Use me. God, just ... Grind that cunt against me ..."
And so you did. You took advantage of your pretty best friend's desperation for you and employed your own desperation for him. To any outsider, you must've looked like the image of depravity as you used Chan for your pleasure, but Chan was just as depraved. You could feel the couch shake from under you, indicating the way in which Chan ground against it as you claimed your orgasm on his tongue.
Riding your high was an incomparable experience. No one had ever made you feel as much pleasure as Chan had. Not even dream-Chan lived up to reality.
You could've sworn you lost consciousness for a few moments after your high, feeling completely weightless when it had finally died down. Your ability to think only came back by the time Chan had climbed back up your body and kissed at your chest once more, smiling at you when he finally reached your lips.
Instead of sharing a sweet moment with him, you claimed his lips once more and licked every last bit of your essence from his mouth. He groaned and allowed his tongue to mingle with yours in such a nasty manner that it made you blush when you remembered that Chan was nothing more than your best friend less than an hour ago.
"Let me fuck you," Chan pleaded when he finally managed to pull away from your greedy lips.
"How do you want me?", you asked as your lips tried to reclaim his yet again. Fuck, he was such a good kisser.
"Fuck. I get to choose?"
You couldn't help but be endeared by him. Also incredibly turned on by how much he clearly wanted you.
Without another word, he repositioned you so you'd be on your hands and knees, running his hand down your back to press the arch of your back a little deeper. He groaned at the sight of you arching your back as deliciously as you could, wiggling your ass as you looked back at him with a cheeky smile, lip trapped between your teeth.
"I've been waiting for this for years, shit. I'm not gonna last."
That made you giggle, continuing to press yourself up against him to get him to break.
"Just fuck me, Channie. Promise it's gonna feel so good."
"Yeah, baby. Gonna fuck you so good."
His tip then finally made contact with your cunt, being dragged up and down your folds as you whined at the feeling. He finally began to penetrate you after becoming too desperate himself.
"You're so fucking warm ..." he breathed out.
Sighing out at the fullness, you pushed back against him, encouraging him to begin fucking into you. Chan took no time in following your lead, adopting a desperate pace almost immediately.
The sounds of skin slapping took over the room, only accompanied by sighs and moans of pleasure from you or Chan. The occasional whiny praise also left his lips every so often. The needy way in which he fucked you had you reeling. Chan had the ability to make you feel extremely desired and like getting to fuck you was the greatest privilege known to man. The way his hands caressed you and his pleas for you to 'please push it back on him' made the experience all the more dreamy to you.
Dream-Chan truly stood no chance to the real one.
"Princess, gonna- fuck, gonna fucking cum. W-where can I?", he grunted from behind, his thrusts somehow becoming even more animalistic.
There was no moment of hesitation in your voice – though shaky from the way in which Chan rutted against you – when you gave him the green light to cum inside you. His groan upon your confirmation only made your back arch even more. Chan's want for you continued to make you feel lightheaded.
Halfway through his own orgasm, Chan triggered your own through the way his hand dipped under you and toyed with your clit. After only one day with you, your best friend already knew how to get you there immediately. He talked you through your orgasm, giving you endless praise about how beautiful you were, how he didn't deserve such a pretty bestie to fuck so good, how he'd beg for you day after day if necessary.
Upon your highs wearing down, Chan managed to reposition you so you could lay next to him. (though almost entirely on top of him) He held you close to him, soft in the way he ran his fingers up and down the length of your arm, enjoying the goosebumps forming. His hand would eventually go over to your face and caress your cheek while his nose rubbed against your own. Treating you like a doll, Chan made you swoon yet again.
"I love you."
Then the world stopped.
"I'm sorry I didn't say it before. It wasn't just a crush. I'm in love with you. And ... and I want you to be mine. Will you be my girlfriend?"
It was all whispered against you, with a soft smile accompanying the whispered words.
"I love you too," the words left your mouth so naturally you were sure they'd been stuck there forever, "Yes, Channie. I'll be your girlfriend," you couldn't help but smile as you said those words.
"Fuck, thank God," he breathed out, hugging you to him, "I never would've gotten over you if you said no. The guys never would've heard the end of it."
He made you laugh, as per usual.
You knew things would only change for the better, so you weren't scared about the change in dynamic that was to come from letting Chan out of the friendzone. All you felt was excitement to finally be with him without guilt.
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content: established relationship, chan's pov, banter, smut, oral (m receiving), mentions of lingerie, teasing, dry humping, riding, etc.
wc: 695 (teaser); 1773 (full drabble)
sneak peak:
Chan had waited for this moment for years. The moment he finally had you all to himself and the moment that would start the rest of his life with you.
Sleeping with you last night had somehow surpassed his craziest of dreams – and he had dreamt about it a lot.
The feeling of your soft skin under his fingertips, the way you moaned against his mouth as his tongue suckled on yours, the sight of your bare body, the feeling of your hands caressing every inch of his body, the taste of your wet cunt ... fuck. He could go on forever reminiscing about you and how obsessed with your touch he had already become.
It had only been a bit over a day since he had woken up next to you on that couch. Granted, the sleep had been slightly uncomfortable, but he had gotten to feel your warm skin against his own as he slept, so it had been worth it.
After some sheepish reaffirmation of your feelings for one another, you had redressed and left the shared house, pinkies intertwined as you went home. Sadly, you had busy days, so you weren't able to see one another at all throughout the following 24 hours. But! You had agreed to see each other tonight for a quiet dinner at Chan's apartment – courtesy of Mingyu's cooking.
Opening the door to his apartment, Chan's chin practically hit the floor when he spotted you in that dress.
Chan had seen you in all types of getups throughout all his years of knowing you. He had obviously seen you in the prettiest of dresses, the tightest and most sinfully tailored pieces. But nothing compared to the pretty little thing you were currently donning.
It was a black slip dress. It wasn't too tight nor too loose. The fabric barely covered his favorite parts of your body, making him reminisce on how they looked without anything covering them at all. You were also shamelessly donning the few hickeys he had left on you just one day ago. Chan was convinced you'd been sent on this Earth to ruin him, to make him a shell of himself and rid him of any ability to act as a functional human being.
The dinner went quite well. You and Chan were far too used to each other for it to go anything but perfect. Your usual banter was present, though Chan now had the privilege of running his hand up and down any sliver of skin he could reach as you teased him about one thing or another. He enjoyed the innocent touches he could give you without any sense of guilt you might be taken by some loser who didn't deserve you. The right to touch you was now entirely reserved by him, just as it should've always been.
It was all perfectly innocent until it wasn't.
Eventually moving to the couch to entertain yourselves with some streaming service, you cuddled against each other. This was an ordinary occurrence between you even as friends. Sure, the cuddling was now a little extra close – with you practically sitting on his lap – but it wasn't anything too intimate so far.
It seemed like this wasn't enough for you, though. It didn't take you too long to move onto his lap, now sitting on top of him while his arms wrapped around your middle. Chan chose to just follow along with whatever position you wanted to cuddle in, just happy to be there at all. Your hands would play with his own, clearly not attentive to the movie at all.
Innocently at first, you rubbed your own hands up and down his arms. This later came to you leading his hands to rub up and down the expanse of your thighs, coming up high enough to lift up most of your skirt. This then evolved into you dipping one of his hands to rub against your panties.
Chan's eyes rolled back when he felt the warmth of your cunt under his hand, already moist and ready for him. You kept pressing his hand against you, so Chan took the hint to play with you.
...
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959 notes · View notes
miniversse · 1 month
Text
⭑ “flaws and all” ⭑
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⭑ bang chan x female reader
⭑ content includes: sex, oral (f receiving, m receiving), releasing, weed, body insecurity, scars, established relationship, non idol chan, non idol reader, pet names (baby, channie), build up
⭑ note: if you want to jump to the nsfw content, i have placed a dash indicating the beginning of it, but the build up is worth it! (this piece is low key chan worship hshshs)
⭑ minors dni
⭑——————————————————⭑
it was 02:34 am. you and chan lay in his bed, the dim purple light of his room illuminating his peaceful face. the room smelt of your boyfriends weed and black musk fragrance, two scents intertwined with one another in your mind. his raspy voice makes an appearance over the faint music playing…
“what do you love me for, y/n?”
his question pierced the silence between you, and you answer him with as much honesty as your physical state can offer.
“a lot chan, a lot. maybe your voice, your face, your personality, your dedication, your patience, your love. a lot”
he turns to face you, eyes red and heavier than ever, but oh prettier than ever. the corner of his lips slightly curve upwards for a slight second and he fidgets with his earring. you didn’t lie when you said those things to him. no matter what chan did, he was perfect to you.
“so… you’re telling me you don’t care about the scar on my back? my unhealthy addiction to weed? my anger issues you have to deal with? my unbelievably long work hours? my body changes?” he takes another smoke of his rolled joint, ironically, before continuing. “i mean, i don’t know. there’s a lot of shit you don’t have to deal with, ‘yknow?”
“i know chan, but people aren’t close-minded like that. of course i see more good in you than bad”
“but that’s the thing y/n, i don’t want you to see bad in me”
“baby” you stop to place a hand on his hair, raising his bangs up only for them to fall back down.
“i love you, flaws and all”
-
it’s almost like a spell was casted as he grabs you and places you above his body, connecting his lips with yours. they felt warm and plush as always. his kisses were hungry and full, taking you all in with every time you connected. his tounge dances with yours, the sounds of your make out session bounce across his walls. he kissed you until he couldn’t breathe anymore. disconnecting
from you with a string of saliva.
the way his eyes looked into yours spoke enough for you to understand how much he appreciated you. he grabs your neck from behind, lowering your head down to make your ear parallel to his lips.
“if you love me flaws and all, show me. yeah?” he whispers to make sure only you could hear him. he plants a kiss on your ear before letting you go, letting you be free, letting you do everything you desire to do, because you fucking loved him.
within a few swift moves, you both remained in your undergarments, making out again while you touch around his member, feeling it harden and rise.
“let me get on my knees”
he lets out a breathy chuckle as you get down to the cold floor on your knees, waiting for him to adjust by the edge of the bed. the music had stopped by now, but the drunk party goers outside filled the silence, and soon will your moans
your fingers wrap around the hem of his boxers, sliding down the fabric that was in a losing game with his cock. you couldn’t wait and so couldn’t he, so you begin to lick the precum forming from his swollen cock. his head darts back quickly, using you hair as a handle. your tongue glides down and up, until he’s fully coated with your saliva. your mouth then takes his cock in, struggling to fit it all. but chan begins to thrust his hips, forcing it down your throat. he whines and moans endlessly.
“mmh, baby. fuh-king shit.”
you pick up the pace, knowing that pulsating was signaling his release. your tongue glides over his member while your mouth reaches to the end of its length, gagging through the process. and at last, your mouth felt warm and heavy with his release. you swallowed it whole, licking any excess off of him.
“shit, shit, shit, fuuckk.” his jaw was fixated on being open as his head fell back, the veins on his neck making an appearance.
“baby you’re, mh, so good”
“i can be better”
you push him back up to the mattress, laying on top of him and letting him strip you bare. his fingers left hot trails where ever he touched you. and both your cores were empty and desperate. your hand makes way to his back, tracing his scar several times until chans eyes grew heavier, and hungrier.
“leave it baby, focus on me”
“it’s apart of you, channie. no one else can have such beautiful marks”
he licks his lips and smiles, his cheeks turn a soft pink, and you know you’ve brought him back to the chan you know.
he guides your waist closer to his member, raising your body above his cock and looking into your eyes for any hesitation, but they only showed love and desperation to have him inside you. he pushes your body down and you synchronize in grunts and moans. he stretches you out while passionately placing kisses on your chest. his hunger doesn’t hold back as he helps you ride his lower torso.
“y-you’re flaws make me love you even more. in my eyes, th-they are perfect imperfections-s”
he didn’t stop to react or to say anything, rather he took more control of you, making you slam into him faster, harder and more lovingly. you moaned into his ears and he did the same. chan would whimper from time to time, and it made you reach your climax even faster.
“come with m-me baby, ok?” he groans into your ear
“mmh, but i’m a-almost there”
“y-yeah, a-almost there”
his hands give in, and he leaves the rest to you. you’re legs begin to shake and your bodies prepare to release. you slam into him one last time, and your arousals commence together, your releases dripping out of your pussy. he lifts your body off and lays you down on the mattress, his head moving down to your swollen, pulsating pussy.
“let me taste us”
his tongue follows a straight, strict path from your vagina to your clit, taking pauses to swallow whatever gathers in his mouth. your eyes roll to the back of your head as he sucks and licks cluelessly. with no shame whatsoever, you come again and straight into chans mouth. his laugh vibrates in your pussy as you moan sweet nothings to him.
it’s back to how it was, except it was 03:11am, you and chan lay in his bed, naked. the dim red light of his room illuminating his flushed face. the room smelt of sex, your boyfriends weed and black musk fragrance, three scents intertwined with one another in your mind. his quite snores keep you up all night, but so does your tireless finger tracing every curve of his body.
“you’re art, chan”
658 notes · View notes
youn9racha · 9 months
Text
no thoughts, aside from the thought of chan just looking up at your sleeping figure as he sucks onto your sensitive buds, mouth encapsulating and creating suction sounds while his other hand occupied the other breast. despite your sleepy state, your mouth spilled a bunch of quiet moans and whimpers, eyes scrunching at the pleasant electrifying sensation surging through your slumbering veins.
"chan..." your voice was barely a whisper, unsure if you were dreaming or if its reality. he lets go of your nipples and got closer to your face and hushing you while his hand gently placed itself at the side of your face, his lips just inches away from yours.
you could sense his hot breath against you, causing you to crave him even further.
"go back to sleep, baby," he whispered against your lips while the other hand dipped down past the duvet and met with your dripping hole, slender fingers just teasing the right area where you want the most pressure.
"let me take care of you..."
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zeroeightzeroone · 5 months
Text
lover of mine - bang chan
genre: angst, hurt eventual comfort
pairings: idol!bang chan x female reader
warnings: none
notes: if this looks familiar, it was originally posted to my secondary blog @zerothreetwentyfive so i'm republishing everything here on my main blog.
wc ~3k|moodboard
。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ 。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ 。 。・:*:・゚★,。・:
"i'll never give you away, 'cause i've already made that mistake,
if my name never fell off your lips again, i know it'd be such a shame.
when i take a look at my life, and all of my crimes, you're the only thing that I think I got right."
lover of mine - 5 seconds of summer
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you always thought that the next time chan would be making you cry would be at your wedding ceremony.
initially, you would try to hold in your tears, just enough so that you weren't full-on sobbing and ruining your makeup. eventually failing as the tears flow freely listening to the man tell you the moment he fell in love with you, the moment he knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life with you and the promises he vows to keep forever. chan's eyes would never leave yours as you exchanged vows; in that moment, only you and chan existed, the proclamation and celebration of your love were the only things that mattered.
instead, here you are crying over chan. sitting in the driver's seat of your car, sobbing over the man who once said he wanted to spend the rest of his life with you, now not wanting to fight for that future anymore.
"you're doing it again."
the sound of your best friend's voice snaps you out of your thoughts, attention now on the girl sitting across from you, "huh?"
she reaches over and places her hand on yours with a sympathetic smile on her face. no words are needed from her to make you realize what you were doing whilst zoning out; fiddling around with your ring finger. a habit you picked up after chan proposed, and a habit that hadn't changed even without the band on your finger; your fingers instinctively moving to spin and twist a non-existent ring.
"right," you clear your throat awkwardly.
your hands slipping out from under hers, sliding them under your thighs hoping that maybe sitting on your hands would work against the habit.
"how are you?"
the word 'lost' feels like an understatement. the word couldn't encapsulate even a quarter of your feelings.
you felt directionless, overwhelmed by the constant switch between emotions: anger, frustration, sadness, and denial, it left you exhausted. day by day, you only grew more emotionally drained, the desire to feel nothing only intensifying.
the mere thought of the dimpled man gave you whiplash, your heart and your head conflicting with each other and your feelings pulling you from one end to the other. you couldn't pinpoint exactly how you felt about him.
god, you wished that you didn't even think about him.
you wished that you weren't plagued by the thought of him at every waking moment. everything reminded you of him, everything brought you back to the memory of how easy it was for him to let you, the person he proclaimed to want to spend the rest of his life with, to watch them walk out the door, to just give up without a fight.
why couldn't it have been easy for you too? why couldn't you just let him go the way he did you? forget him like he meant absolutely nothing?
as much as you wished it was, you knew it wouldn't be easy to move on from chan.
your early adulthood started with chan, moving in with him almost a year and a half after you started dating. he became a part of your routine and you became part of his; there was a time when your day didn't feel complete without hearing a goodnight from him or getting that goodnight kiss. your lives were intertwined, and your future plans were intertwined.
you believed chan was your future. he made you believe that you would write the next chapters of your lives together, that you two would be side by side on the road to forever. you envisioned your future with chan, without him you've hit a crossroads, struggling to navigate where to go from here. you were scared.
scared to learn what the future holds for you, scared to take a step towards a future without him.
on top of all that came public attention.
the news about your breakup hadn't been confirmed by chan or jyp entertainment. regardless that didn't stop the speculations and rumours that came with the lack of seeing you and chan in public together, seeing you without your ring, and other proofs fans would dig up. the algorithm also working against you as whenever you refreshed social media, the first couple of posts would be news articles, headlines and what have you, discussing the speculations.
'did stray kids' bang chan and his long term girlfriend call it quits?'
'fans of stray kids speculate bang chan and his partner have called off the engagement'
'netizens react to alleged proofs that bang chan and long term girlfriend have split up'
'breaking: did stray kids' bang chan and girlfriend split up? here's why fans are wondering about the status of the long-term couple'
your comments were flooded with questions regarding the rumours, mourning fans hoping that they were baseless and haters congratulating you on setting the man free. you wondered why the news hadn't been spoken about by chan or any official representatives but the speculations drove you to log out of social media. the realization that one day the articles and headlines will change from 'speculations' to 'confirmations' the anticipation and anxiety driving you insane.
you look back up to your friend, your lips pursed together in a small smile as you reply:
"i'm fine."
"chan hyung!"
the boy pulls the pillow up and over his head, trying to block out the noises from outside the door. hoping that the longer he ignored, the realization that he wanted to be alone would sink in and everyone would leave him be. that hope was short-lived as the door swung open.
"chan hyung!" changbin calls from his spot at the door, "you need to eat something."
from where he's standing, changbin watches chan groan out a response from under the pillow, making no effort to get up and go eat something. changbin's eyes drift to the older boy's bedside table, a picture frame is lying face down (probably a photo of you), and sitting on top of the frame is a gold band with a large diamond: your engagement ring. the sight of the band sitting on chan's bedside table and not on your finger has a small frown adorning changbin's lips.
"hyung, i know it's hard but please. you need to take care of yourself too," the younger boy sighs, "locking yourself in your room won't do anyone good."
of course, it wasn't easy for them to see chan in such a state.
chan had always been the one putting up a strong front, walking around with his head up no matter the circumstances as the leader. but these past couple of weeks, whenever chan was out of the public eye he'd walk with his head down, dragging his feet, no words leaving him. almost like he's being forced to be anywhere outside of his bedroom.
the members in the other dorm were curious about their leader, wondering how he'd been holding up but chan stopped replying to the group chat. it got to the point where the members made a chat without chan, using that to ask jisung, changbin and hyunjin how the older one was doing.
for as long as you were in chan's life, you were also in the member's lives. the news of the breakup came as a shock to them as well. they were all curious as to how you were doing too, but were hesitant to ask you directly for fear of making things harder for you. you met all of them through chan, and seeing their names pop up on your phone may just be another reminder of your ex.
changbin's eyes are on chan as the older boy takes the pillow off his head, slowly sitting up on the bed, feet hitting the floor but making no move to stand up. instead he's slouched over, head in his hands and sighing.
"do you, uh…" chan's voice barely above a whisper, "do you think i made a mistake?"
changbin shuts the door behind him hearing chan's question, realizing right now his friend needed someone to talk to before, maybe, going to eat something.
leaning against the door, he replies, "what do you mean?"
"w– was proposing… a mistake?"
"do you feel like it was a mistake?"
chan shakes his head, "no."
"did you mean everything you said when you proposed?"
"yes."
"then it wasn't a mistake."
chan lifts his head out of his hands, head turning to the younger boy leaning at the door. even in the dim purple lighting of chan's room, changbin can see how glossy his eyes are, how the bags under his eyes have gotten more prominent since yesterday.
"was… was letting her go," chan's voice shaky, "a mistake?"
changbin pushes himself off the door, making his way to sit next to his hyung on the bed. a comforting hand moving to chan's back.
"that's a question only you can answer," changbin's lips are pursed to one side, a sympathetic look in his eyes as he continues, "did it feel like a mistake at the time?"
"i- i thought i was doing the right… thing," chan's voice pitches higher at the end, questioning his own answer, "when i came home, an–and saw the dinner table, full of food she made for us. when she told me everything she was feeling, the look i-in her eyes."
chan loves your eyes, it's by far his favourite thing about you.
looking into your eyes had him falling in love with you before he even knew it. looking into them made it feel as if he was looking into your soul, almost like your eyes could tell him what your words couldn't. chan's day would immediately be flipped upside down just at the sight of your eyes, a shitty day becoming the best day when he caught a glimpse of those radiant, warm pools of life, your eyes sparkling with a zest and excitement for life that sent a wave of comfort over him. whenever he looked at you, that glimmer of hope in your eyes made him feel like everything would be okay.
but that night, the look in your eyes that night is seared into chan's memory. haunting him whenever he closes his eyes, whenever his eyes fall on your ring sitting on his bedside table.
that night when you told him just how lonely you'd been feeling, how you felt like he was treating you like the help and not as his fiancé; those words knocked some sense into chan. the harsh reality glaring him down: he had been falling short in your relationship. he had been so blind to that fact for who knows how long, listening to you had chan wallowing in guilt.
at one point chan felt like he was a third person watching everything go down, but it felt like he was watching you and a whole different person. he wondered why he wasn't saying anything, why he couldn't move, why he couldn't feel anything other than guilt eating him alive.
when he looked into your eyes, that's when everything came crashing down.
the eyes that once gleamed up at him, washing a wave of comfort and reassurance through his body were boring into his own. the contrast had his blood running cold. the sight of your hollow and dull orbs gazing up at him, even the sources of light around you did nothing to bring back that sparkle. the way your eyes looked incredibly sunken in, tired, swimming with distress as they searched his. he wondered how he hadn't seen the change before.
a change that happened because of him. the light in your eyes is gone all thanks to him. he wanted to be the one to preserve and make sure your eyes light up for the rest of your life, but instead he's the reason you look defeated. he couldn't handle the guilt eating him up at the sight.
"i-i broke her," chan whispers, "you could see it in her eyes how my shortcomings, the ones i was too blind and stupid to notice… that broke her. i broke her."
changbin doesn't say anything.
"i thought it would be better for me to let her go… get her away from me who was sucking the life out of her," chan's hands run through his hair, "she deserves so much more than me."
the older boy cries. his thoughts, feelings, everything just clouded with you.
"hyung," changbin's tone is soft, feeling out the atmosphere, "don't you think that it's sucking the life out of her even more, to be away from you?"
this time chan is the one who doesn't say anything.
"she wanted you to stay, she wanted you to convince her to stay."
"convince me to stay… please."
"i'm sorry."
"yes. from what you told us the day after you broke up, she does deserve better."
changbin's words send a dagger to chan's heart.
"but don't you want to be the one she deserves?"
chan's head turns to look at changbin.
"you need to work to be better, to be the one y/n deserves. that's what she wants, she wants you hyung."
"… m-me?"
"she wouldn't have said yes to marrying you if she didn't want you for the rest of her life."
your plan for the day was to wake up around noon, order some takeout or ransack your best friend's freezer for some food (and ice cream), chill on the couch and watch some netflix. instead you're jolted awake, at ten in the morning, by pounding at the front door.
rolling your eyes in annoyance, stretching your arm out, feeling around before grasping a pillow and clutching it over your head, trying your hardest to block out the noises and fall asleep. hoping the longer you hold out, it will give off the illusion that no one's home and come back later. a couple moments pass, a sigh of relief falls from your lips when the knocking stops, allowing you to loosen your grip on the pillow around your head.
maybe the neighbours got annoyed and kicked whoever that was out.
at the silence, you roll onto your side and shift your body around to get comfortable in the mattress. another long breath leaving your lips once that optimal position to fall asleep in is found, closing your eyes and getting ready to be lulled back into dreamland.
now you think someone is fucking with you.
the knocking starts up again, for a second you thought you'd fallen asleep and the knocking was continuing in your dreams but no. sadly, you weren't lulled back into dreamland like you hoped, the pounding in your head making it apparent that this was indeed, reality.
on top of all the things happening in your life lately, being woken up by a stranger relentlessly hammering the life out of their fist on your– actually, your best friend's– door is the kicker to a great day. a whine leaving your lips as you roll out of bed, pouting as you trudge to the door of the guest bedroom and continue your trek down the hall, towards the front door.
sure, you wouldn't have minded if your best friend, the person who lives in this unit, was actually home to answer the door. alas, she's at work whilst you're here; straightening out your pyjamas and plastering the fakest smile on your lips whilst you undo the locks, twisting the doorknob and swinging the door open.
"hello, mis—"
your jaw drops. posture immediately straightening due to the wave of tension that rushes through your veins, your mind comes up with two options: hide behind the door or run. your heart begins to race in your chest, tears threatening to spill at any moment but your feet are cemented to the ground. any urge you had to run away and hide quickly depleting at the sight of the man in front of you, a bouquet of flowers in his hands.
"chan… wh-what are you doing here?"
there he is: the man of the hour.
in front of you, in the flesh. standing a couple inches away from you clad in his usual all-black attire. you're avoiding his gaze but can't seem to pry your eyes off the bouquet in the man's hold.
a medley of red and white roses, baby's breath peeking throughout the arrangement.
"i- i needed to see you," chan's voice comes out husky.
shifting awkwardly on your feet, you sigh, "how did you know i was here?"
"multiple calls to your best friend and a long speech," he uses his free hand to scratch at the back of his neck, a nervous smile on his lips.
'she's getting a long speech from me too.'
"okay, well…" you clear your throat, "you saw me so bye."
you go to shut the door but chan stumbles forward, holding it open as he stands in the doorframe. the gush of air from his sudden movements gives you a whiff of his cologne. that along with the closer proximity has a lump forming in your throat.
"w-wait, i wanted to talk too."
"y-you spoke and so did i so, bye," you choke out, trying to close the door again but to no avail as his body blocks your way, "please chan, what more do you want from me? don't make this harder for me."
chan reaches forward at the sight of a tear falling, wanting to wipe it away but you flinch away from his touch. your reaction has chan recoiling, he shifts awkwardly on his feet. you go to turn away from him.
"i made a mistake," he states, his words coming out rushed.
you gulp, angling your body towards the man again. this time your arms crossed over your chest, your gaze still falling away from his face. chan's throat clears when he realizes that you're not going to speak.
"that night, i shouldn't have let you go," he continues, "i should've told you, said something, said anything to convince you to stay… but… fuck. i- i was scared."
your eyes glance up at his face, only to look away just as quickly.
"you're probably thinking, of what?" chan runs a hand through his hair, "but listening to everything you said, everything that i was stupid, ignorant enough not to notice, all those things that i did– or, uh didn't do… that hurt you. it scared me to tell you i wanted you to stay."
your eyebrows furrow in frustration, this time your gaze stays on his face, making no move to wipe the tears running down your cheeks.
"listening to you, hearing how much i hurt you. i- i thought it would've been selfish of me to tell you to stay," chan's voice cracks, tears falling from his eyes as well, "i thought i would hurt you more if you stayed… that you didn't deserve that, y-you deserved so much more than me."
"god, chan.…" a bitter smile on your lips, "you saying nothing, letting me leave… a-and not fighting for me, for us! fuck… that hurt more than anything."
the memories of that night have your heart aching. whimpering as the tears continue to fall, the sight has chan's gradually getting heavier in his chest. he wants nothing but to pull you into his arms and to never let go.
"i know… i know. baby, i'm so sorry," chan's cheeks are soaked with tears but he makes no effort to wipe them away, "i'm so fucking sorry. i thought i was doing what was best for you, but i fucked up, i fucked up big time."
your eyes lock with chan's. glossy, tear-filled orbs gazing into each other, at that moment the tears only build until the both of you are crying a river in the hallway.
chan quite literally launches himself at you. throwing his arms around your body and pulling you into his chest. instinctively, your arms wrap around his torso, nuzzling your head into his shirt. bodies trembling and shaking as the both of you cry in each other's arms.
chan soaks up every single thing about this moment; the warmth of your body radiating onto him, your face nuzzled into his chest, the smell of your hair, the way your hands grip the back of his shirt, the feeling of your body pressed up against his. he isn't even sure that you'll take him back. regardless, he knows he wants to work his hardest to ensure he'll have you in his arms every day for the rest of his life.
in his arms, he holds the person who has been with him every step of the way and supported him day in and day out. the biggest mistakes chan ever made took place on that day: not convincing you to stay, not telling you how he loves you with his entire heart, and holding your engagement ring in his hand while he watched you walk out.
chan wants you to be so much more than just his past and present, he wants you to be his future, his forever. he's always wanted that but he failed at showing you, instead hurting you in ways he was completely ignorant of.
"i love you," chan cries, you can hear his heart racing in his chest, "i love you so much. if you let me, i'll work every single moment of every day to show you that. when i told you i wanted you for the rest of my life, i meant it. i mean it with my whole heart. i fucked up–majorly, but i swear to you! i swear i'll show you that i'm the one you deserve, that i can give you that life you deserve."
chan looks down at you, enveloped in his arms as your gaze naturally lifts to meet his eyes.
chan's heart skips a beat.
there it is.
that sparkle.
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myseungsunglove · 4 months
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Say that again | Bc
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Pairing: Bang Chan x reader
Warnings: fluff, almost smut but mostly just alluding to it.
Word Count: approx. 800
𖠫Summary: After watching Chan’s episode with the Felix and him playing with the twin girls, your mind is sent reeling by thoughts you’d never really entertained before. You voice those thoughts to Chan and find yourself quite surprised by his response.
✎A/N✎: I am not responsible for my sleepy thoughts. The thoughts that prevail and demand to be written BEFORE the damn stories I already have outlined. I guess be thankful you’re getting anything at all at this point. *laughs nervously* Also, domestic Chan makes me so weak and thus this fic was born. Not super edited because I sleepies.
◠ ◡ ◠᭚ιαᵕ̈
「© December 28, 2023 by myseungsungheart」
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“Babe? Did you hear me?”
Chan’s voice shakes you from your thoughts. You’d entirely lost track of the conversation. Mainly because your mind was wondering to places you really never had let it before. The two of you had just watched Felix and Chan’s episode with the twins. Watching Chan with those precious little girls had really stirred something in you that you genuinely thought you didn’t want.
“Hmm?” the sound leaves you as your eyes meet his and he smiles softly at your dazed look.
“What’s going through that pretty head of yours?” Chan asks, a hint of concern in his voice as he reaches out and brushes his hand lightly against your jaw, this thumb caressing your cheek with care as he holds your gaze.
You find that words don’t immediately spring forth, so instead you lean forward and press your lips against Chan’s. He melts into the kiss, his arm snaking around your waist and pulling you closer to him on the couch, your mouths moving slowly together as the graze of his touch causes goosebumps to break out on your skin.
“That doesn’t really answer my question,” he chuckles against your lips, pulling away reluctantly and looking into your eyes again.
You sigh. It’s deep and meaningful. Chan can tell whatever you aren’t saying is weighing heavy on your mind.
“That bad, huh?” he asks hesitantly, letting go of your face to grab your hand instead, interlacing your fingers together. “Whatever it is, I’m always here, baby,” he assures you.
You close your eyes briefly, stealing up all the courage you can muster for the next sentence you’re about to utter. It really could change everything and your heart flutters at the thought. Your husband is a busy man, with producing music and working with the boys non stop. Is this really something he’d want? You haven’t talked about it in so long because you really thought you didn’t want this. Now, you are questioning everything you once thought.
“I think I want to you try to have a baby,” you say and it comes out all in a rush as if the sentence was just once giant word strung together.
“What was that?” Chan asks, his brows knitting together in confusion as he chuckles quietly at you.
“I want to have a baby,” you say, this time more slowly and with more certainty. “I know we haven’t talked about it in a long time because I thought I didn’t want that, but…”
Your words are cut off by Chan’s lips crashing into yours, the kiss raw and hungry, his tongue pushing into your mouth as he pushes you back against the couch and hovers over you. He pulls away breathless, his chest heaving, his eyes full of love and hope. Not the reaction you anticipated.
“God,” he whispers, leaning in to kiss your jaw. “Please,” he continues, the trail of kisses moving along your jaw to your neck. “Say that again,” he all but begs as his lips hurriedly kiss up along the column of your neck and back to your mouth.
You reach out for his face then, holding it mere centimeters away from yours and speak again.
“Let’s have a baby,” you whisper.
“I thought you didn’t want,” he starts but you cut him off.
“I thought I didn’t too, but really I just thought I’d make a horrible mom. Didn’t want to end up like mine, you know?”
He watches you carefully, brows knit together again as he stays hovered over your body. He’s shaking his head, but you power through.
“But watching you with those girls made me realize I could do absolutely anything with you by my side. You’d be such a great dad and god i want that for a kid. I want someone to feel so lucky knowing you’re their dad. I want our kid to know that,” you finish, your eyes darting back and forth between his.
“You’re wrong about one thing,” he counters, kissing your lips gently before speaking again. “You’re already great at loving people. You love me for god knows why. You love those seven crazy men I call my members and take care of them. You would make a great mom, of that much I have never had any doubt.”
You pull his lips to yours once more, your fingers running into the hair at the back of his head and hold him to you. You’re crying and you’re not sure when that started.
“Please,” you beg as Chan’s hips settle between yours, his desire for you evident as he presses in closer to you. “Chan,” you can’t stop the breathy moan that escapes you.
“I’d take on the world with you, do anything for you,” he says, pulling away from your lips long enough to look into your eyes. “Including starting a family,” he adds, his hips rolling into you and causing your back to arch up off the couch. “How about we see if we can’t make that happen, hmmm?” he says against your mouth, his hands now freely roaming your body.
“Yes,” you agree, your head spinning. “I love you,” you remind him as his hands move to remove your clothes and make your’s and his dream a reality.
“I love you more,” he assures you, before kissing you deeply once more and giving you everything you’ve hoped for and more.
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vcrnons · 5 months
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DINO 'Wait' Official MV
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chrisbangs · 6 months
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Bang Chan .:. 락 (LALALALA) Inkigayo [231112]
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lvllylix · 9 months
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Melody of Love
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Title: Melody of Love
Song: Mine by Bazzi
Pairing: Chan x reader
Word count: 838
Warnings: curse words, slightly suggestive lyrics
Summary: Chan decides to surprise you with a heartfelt birthday gift – a song he writes and records. The lyrics convey his feelings, and the special moment shared between you two becomes a memory you'll forever cherish.
A/N: Unfortunately, I don't have any songwriting abilities so the song is pretty much just the same as the original. I also wrote this for my birthday but I'm not really sure how happy I am with it. Feedback is always welcome.
--
Your heart raced with excitement as the sun dipped below the horizon, casting a warm orange glow across the city. It was your birthday, a day you had been looking forward to, and you couldn't help but feel a tingle of anticipation in the air.
The day had been filled with surprises, from breakfast in bed to a heartfelt letter from your friends. But as the evening approached, you found yourself at your favorite park, surrounded by fairy lights that twinkled like stars.
The soft strumming of a guitar caught your attention, and your gaze shifted to where Chan, your boyfriend, sat on a blanket adorned with candles. His fingers danced across the strings, creating a gentle melody that floated through the air.
A warm smile tugged at your lips as he continued to play, his voice joining the melody in sweet harmony. The words of the song were familiar yet different, with a touch of Chan's unique style. It was as if he had written it himself.
"So many nights I've been thinking about you, girl," Chan's voice was a soothing caress, his eyes locked onto yours. "You got me going crazy, it's all about you, girl."
As the melody unfolded, your heart swelled with emotion. The lyrics resonated with you deeply, reflecting the journey you and Chan had taken together.
"And I know that you don't know it, but you're fine, so fine," Chan's voice held a tenderness that made your breath catch. "And I promise that I'll show it every time, so let me be your man."
Tears gathered in your eyes as the sincerity in his words wrapped around you like a warm embrace. The crowd around you seemed to fade into the background, leaving only you and Chan in a world of your own.
The chorus of the song filled the air, and Chan's voice grew stronger, his eyes shining with love.
"You're so fucking precious when you smile, hit it from the back and drive you wild."
A heat crept up your cheeks at the boldness of the lyrics, but it was the way he looked at you as if you were the only person in the world, that made your heart race.
"Girl, I lose myself up in those eye-eye-eyes, I just had to let you know you're mine."
As the song reached its conclusion, Chan's fingers slowed on the guitar, and the last note hung in the air like a whispered promise. The park was filled with a moment of silence as if the world itself was holding its breath.
And then, as if on cue, the people around you erupted into applause, their smiles and cheers filling the air. You could feel the weight of Chan's gaze on you, his expression hopeful and vulnerable.
With a shaky breath, you walked toward him, your heart pounding in your chest. As you stood in front of him, Chan set the guitar aside, his eyes never leaving yours.
"You wrote that?" Your voice trembled with emotion, your heart a symphony of feelings.
Chan nodded, his smile filled with affection. "Yeah. I wanted to tell you how much you mean to me, and I thought a song might capture it better than words alone."
Tears spilled over, and you cupped his face in your hands, your thumbs brushing away the moisture from his cheeks. "Chan, that was the most beautiful gift anyone has ever given me."
He leaned into your touch, his eyes closing momentarily as he savored your warmth. "I'm glad you liked it."
Pulling him into a tight embrace, you held onto him as if afraid that the moment might slip away. His arms wrapped around you, and you could feel his heartbeat against your chest, a rhythm that mirrored your own.
"You know," you whispered against his ear, "I've loved you since the moment I met you."
Chan pulled back slightly, his eyes locking onto yours with a mixture of surprise and adoration. "Really?"
You nodded, your fingers trailing gently along his jawline. "I didn't think you felt the same way."
A soft laugh escaped him, his gaze intense as he leaned in, his forehead resting against yours. "Trust me, Y/N, I've loved you from the very beginning."
And then his lips were on yours, a sweet and tender kiss that carried all the unsaid words and unspoken feelings between you. In that moment, you knew that Chan's song was more than just music – it was a melody of love that had been playing in both of your hearts all along.
As the stars emerged in the velvety night sky, you found solace in each other's arms. Chan's song continued to echo in your heart, a reminder of the love that had brought you to this moment, a moment you would forever cherish.
And so, under the blanket of stars, you and Chan shared a kiss that spoke of promises and dreams, a kiss that sealed your hearts together in a melody of love that would last a lifetime.
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blu-joons · 2 years
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BEST FRIEND A.C.E. A⇴Z HEADCANON ⇴ Kang Yuchan
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A ⇴ ATTENTION
Quite often Yuchan would give you his attention without even realising that he was doing it. His eye can’t help but look, and his ear definitely can’t help but listen for your laughter whenever he knows you’re around.
B ⇴ BICKER
When the two of you bicker, you usually use others around you in hysterics too because of how ridiculous you can get towards one another. No one can ever really believe the things that come out of your mouths when you bicker as you both have a determination to try and outlast the other when chatting.
C ⇴ COMFORT
It’s the one time that Yuchan is serious around you, when you need comforting. He knows as your best friend that he needs to be there for you, and he absolutely is. He won’t laugh or joke, he’ll give you a comfortable space to feel as if you can talk about what’s on your mind and also feel supported by him.
D ⇴ DISAGREEMENTS
On the rare occasion that the two of you argue, they never usually last for too long. Yuchan especially will make the effort to talk to you and understand where things weren’t wrong so that you both could fix it. The two of you had a pretty good understanding of one another anyway, but when a disagreement did arise you made sure to find out where things went wrong so you could learn something new about each other.
E ⇴ EARLY YEARS
Because you met in a professional capacity, the two of you found yourselves talking mainly because it was your job to. You tended to keep the conversation very strict between the two of you at the start, but that wasn’t what Yuchan wanted. The more time that he spent with you, the more time that he spent trying to get to know you better, encouraging you to relax and be friendly rather than professional.
F ⇴ FAMILY
Yuchan’s family were big fans of you, they were constantly reminding him not to let you go. They only ever wanted what was best for Yuchan and having you as a best friend was definitely one of those things. Every single time that they saw you, they made sure to remind Yuchan of just how great they thought you were, and he knew too that he was lucky, without them having to drill it into him.
G ⇴ GETTING TOGETHER
When the two of you hung out, you’d work off of impulse, neither of you ever really knew what you wanted to do. You loved to just see what took your fancy, whether it was something local, or if you fancied a drive heading further out to the outskirts of the city to see if you could find something new to get up to.
H ⇴ HABITS
The two of you had a habit of knowing exactly when the other was going through a difficult time. The lack of smiles on your faces would speak volumes straight away to one another, but even just when you were speaking to one another on the phone you could tell straight away when things weren’t alright.
I ⇴ INSIDE JOKES
His funny antics especially left you and Yuchan with many inside jokes between you both, as you never let him forget the ones where he left himself feeling embarrassed especially. You loved to use them to get Yuchan to do things for you as he never wanted anyone else to know about his humiliating moments.
J ⇴ JEALOUSY
Getting jealous wasn’t something that happened very often for Yuchan, he didn’t care about most of your other friends as he knew that he would always be your best friend and that no one else would be better than him. If someone wanted to try and get close to you, Yuchan often couldn’t help but just laugh at them as he knew that they would never get anywhere near threatening his role as your best friend.
K ⇴ KICKS
Yuchan got a kick out of making you jump, he was constantly hiding and jumping out on you to make you laugh, or scream. You were constantly on your toes as you never quite knew where Yuchan would come from as he kept finding new places to hide, spots that he knew that you’d never expect him to be too.
L ⇴ LOVE
He loved how well the two of you worked together, Yuchan always had fun whenever he was with you. Even if you weren’t at work and doing something silly like trying to win a toy at the arcade or deciding on how to organise your snacks so that they fitted in the cupboard to hide them from everyone else, the two of you were a great team, there were never any arguments or cross words at each other.
M ⇴ MEETING
The two of you first met when you were hired as a dancer for one of the group’s stages. You were shy to say the least when you first met as you’d heard several of the group’s songs, but Yuchan especially made you feel welcome and showed you the ropes which was how your friendship started.
N ⇴ NONSENSE
Most people saw Yuchan as the funny guy, but you saw that to a whole new extreme, he didn’t care what he looked like around you, he would embarrass more than he did around anyone else when he was with you.
O ⇴ OBSESSION
Yuchan was obsessed with your laughter, it was always a sound that he welcomed. Your happiness was something that Yuchan was particularly fond of and something that he always wanted to see with you too.
P ⇴ PRECIOUS MOMENTS
The moments that meant the most to Yuchan were the ones when the two of you were up on stage together. He especially loved when you danced more alongside him, being able to see your smile and your passion in dance often gave him the motivation to perform a little bit better too so that everything went perfectly.
Q ⇴ QUESTIONS
He never shied away from asking you for advice, most people knew too that Yuchan relied on you a lot. Even if it was a stupid question, Yuchan knew that you’d always try and answer it seriously for him.
R ⇴ RANDOM FACTS
Whenever he introduced you to a member of staff, he would introduce you first as his best friend, and then as a dancer. He did it mainly because he was proud to be able to call you his best friend, but also slightly as he wanted to make sure that none of the staff members tried to get too close to you.
S ⇴ SUPPORT
Your encouragement was one of Yuchan’s favourite things because you always made things sound so positive. He especially loved it if you were working with him as you could support him right before he went out on stage which was usually when the nerves started to eat away and trouble him the most.
T ⇴ TRIPS
One of the advantages of having you working with the group meant that you went on many of their group trips too. Yuchan loved nothing more than when he saw you on the list of dancers flying out with them.
U ⇴ ULTIMATE
He couldn’t wish for anyone better than you, you were the best friend that he had dreamed of having when he was younger.
V ⇴ VISITS
Quite often Yuchan would visit you at work and see what it was that you were getting up to. If you were working on something for the group, then he would never say no to a sneak preview of what that was.
W ⇴ WISDOM
He was like a box of advice for you, Yuchan always had something to say to try and make life just a tiny little bit easier for you.
X ⇴ XXXX
For the most part the two of you were quite affectionate, however if you needed not to be for some reason then you’d absolutely respect that. You knew when it was alright to joke and when to behave yourselves.
Y ⇴ YOU
You were his pride, he loved showing you off and bragging about how talented you were.
Z ⇴ ZZZ
The moment it seemed even just the tiniest bit unsafe for you to drive home, Yuchan would make you stay with him. He refused to let you put yourself in even the slightest bit of harm by driving late at night especially.
---
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ihave-atummyache · 5 months
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everyone is a little toxic
Stray Kids Imagine
summary: toxic traits of skz
sfw! mean!skz toxic!skz but nothing crazy fr. suuuuuper angsty
-OT8
5.7k words
ik i said that i would post it all in one part but mwahahahha😈 there will be a pt 2. later gators
pt2:
Bang Chan: Overworks himself then takes it out on you.
You scoop the meal you just made into a bowl and stare at the steaming food, your lip between your teeth. It is for your boyfriend, Chan, who has locked himself in his room to keep working on a track. The same track that practically had him in tears last week.
You know if you go in and bother him, there is a fifty-fifty chance of him snapping at you. He often does when you 'bother' him while he is working. It isn't your fault that you get concerned for your extremely overworked boyfriend!
You let out a deep sigh and pick the bowl up before making your way over to the room that was set up as an office for him. You knock gently on the door twice before letting yourself in. He often has headphones on and doesn't notice you when you knock so you always let yourself in.
"Channie?" You question, walking towards his hunched figure at his desk. You glances over at you when he senses your presence but doesn't bother taking a headphone off or even trying to talk to you.
You bite down on your lip and debate walking back out of the room and not even talking to him or offering him food. He has been locked up in this room for almost 24 hours. He neglected coming to bed last night and instead has been sat in front of his computer.
"I made dinner," you comment as you reach his desk. He knows you’re there but chooses to pretend he first notice you. Once you're beside him, he dramatically rips his headphones off and slams his hands on the desk, making you jump.
"What, y/n? What could you possibly want right now?" he snaps at you and you bite down on your lip, feeling tears wanting to well up at the embarrassment he was making you feel for trying to take care of him. Your cheeks and neck burn with a deep blush.
Chan’s eyes are bloodshot and glassy. His face is flush and his hair is sticking up in every direction, an obvious sign that he has been running his fingers through it over and over again.
You were right, you should have turned around and left. But its too late now. You're already in the room and you're already getting yelled at so you might as well accept it, even if it does break your heart.
"I-I made you dinner," you stutter out and break eye contact with him, opting to look at the bowl in your hands instead. It is still steaming hot and the steam is hitting your nostrils, making your own stomach growl. You know this is one of Chan's favorites so hopefully it'll act as a peace offering.
"Oh my God. Get out! If I was hungry or if I wanted you in here, I would have called for you," he snaps at you again and pulls the headphones over his ears again, turning to face the computer screen.
You feel your face heat up more in a mix of anger and embarrassment before you slam the bowl down on the desk beside him. You try not to notice that the liquid sloshes out of the bowl slightly and lands on your hand, immediately burning you.
You turn on your heel and storm out of the room, slamming the door behind you. By the time you reach the kitchen, angry tears are running down your face and your even angrier hands are trying to wipe them away.
Lee Know: Short tempered
You know Minho has a short temper. Everyone knows that, but it doesn't excuse him going off on you for absolutely no reason. You often are the object of his anger because you are together so much and you’re usually able to just brush his outbursts off.
However, sometimes you just can’t let them go.
"Hm?" You question, pulling your headphones off. You had seen your boyfriend talking to you but only caught the end of his sentence by the time you removed the headphones. He rolls his eyes at you, obviously annoyed.
"I hate repeating myself, y/n. You know this," he raises his eyebrows at you and you blink at him a few times, waiting for him to say whatever it was that he had said.
"I said," he starts, attitude dripping in his tone, "Do you want to go to that new restaurant for dinner tonight?" he asks and you nod.
"Yes of course. When do you wanna go?" you ask and stand up. For some reason, you miscalculated exactly how close you were to the table and your knee hits the table, knocking your glass of water over and making it roll off the table, shattering all over the floor.
"Are you kidding me? Why is it so hard for you to do simple tasks like listening and watching where you're going?" Minho snaps at you before walking towards the kitchen. You roll your eyes and opt to not reply.
You squat down to pick up the glass and somehow one of the shards cuts your finger, right where it meets your palm. You let out a hiss and drop the glass on the ground bringing your hand closer to inspect it.
The cut isn't too deep but it is in one of those spots that seems like it will never stop bleeding. You stand quickly as the blood drops from your hand and lands on your mess. As you walk towards the kitchen, you are dripping blood and don't notice.
"Did you seriously cut yourself?" Minho's tone is impatient with you again and you nod, walking towards the sink to rinse the cut out.
"Let me see it," he demands and you shake your head, letting the water run over the cut, another hiss leaving your mouth at the sting.
"Stop being so fucking stubborn," he grabs your wrist, a little too harshly, and yanks it from under the water to look at it, making you stumble into him slightly.
"Stop being so fucking mean," you reply and snatch your hand from his grip. He scoffs at you and rolls his eyes, slamming the towel that was in his hand down on the counter beside him.
"If I'm so fucking mean, then clean your own damn mess," he spits at you before leaving the room, his heavy footsteps indicating that he is making his way to your shared bedroom.
You let out a frustrated yell and grab the first aid kit from under the sink. All you did was ask him to repeat himself and drop a fucking glass and he's acting like this is the end of the world.
"Y/n! You got blood on the floor. You couldn't have at least stopped that from happening?" You hear Minho's voice again and you ignore him, not feeding into his temper anymore.
You hear his footsteps making their way towards the kitchen again and slam your hands down on the countertop, definitely making your cut bleed much more than it was before.
"You don't hear me talking to you?" He questions and you turn around facing him. A look of disgust and annoyance covers your face.
"Oh fuck off, Minho. Yell at somebody who gives a shit," You snap and push past him, letting your shoulder hit him a little too hard, and making your way to your bedroom, slamming and locking the door behind you.
Changbin: Arrogant
"Who was that?" You ask, setting your purse down as you enter you apartment. Changbin comes in behind you and helps you slide your coat off, placing a kiss to your bare shoulder.
"I met her a while ago at an award show," he replies and you nod, toeing off your shoes. You aren't one to get insecure or jealous, especially with the way your man is all over you, even in public.
But something about this girl just really rubbed you the wrong way. The way he unwrapped his arm from your waist to shake her hand made your stomach flip. Her lingering touches and flirty eyes, all while you were standing right there.
"She seemed a little touchy," you comment and Changbin shrugs, ultimately disregarding your comment.
"You only met her once?" You clarify again as you follow Changbin into the bedroom to change your clothes.
"Mhm, she used to have a thing for Hyunjin I think," he comments, loosening his tie and sliding it over your head. You let out a little 'ah' and pull your dress off, replacing it with a t-shirt and sleep shorts. You make your way into the bathroom and grab a makeup wipe, starting to remove your eye makeup.
"Why are you acting so weird? You aren't jealous, are you?" Changbin's voice sounds from the doorframe and you look over at him before looking back into the mirror, shrugging.
"It isn't that I'm jealous,” you clarify, “It's more like the principle of her overstepping obvious boundaries that you wouldn't push with someone who is in a relationship," you try to explain.
"It wasn't that serious," Changbin once again shrugs off your feelings and you turn to face him, crossing your arms across your chest.
"Are you even listening to me, Bin?" your voice is laced with frustration.
"Of course I am. You're jealous because some colleague was being too nice to me," he turns to walk away and you scoff. 
"Do you listen to anything but the sound of your own damn voice?" you suddenly snap at him and he freezes before turning back around to face you. He opens his mouth to speak but you interrupt him before he can start.
"Whenever I tell you about my feelings or try to have a conversation like this with you, you just brush it off. I'm not jealous, Changbin. It's the principle of it all. And if I was jealous, you definitely aren't doing anything to help my insecurity," your temper has ran out and his eyebrows drop into a furrow, seemingly confused about your sudden outburst.
"I just don't understand why you are coming for me like this when I didn't do anything," he says, his own tone starting to reflect yours.
"What I'm trying to say is-"
"No I get what you're trying to say. I just don't understand why you're so mad at me," he tries to clarify and you turn back towards the sink.
"Then you obviosuly don't get what I'm-"
"Y/n you need to calm down," He interrupts you and you scoff, slamming your hands down on the sink.
"Stop fucking interrupting me! You are so fucking arrogant. Oh my God! You can't even actually listen to me for five fucking minutes without having to have your own input," you snap and he takes a step towards you so you're face to face in the bathroom.
"Sometimes you're wrong, Changbin. Whether you like it or not. Get your head out of your ass," you push past him and go towards the living room.
Hyunjin: Perfectionist
Hyunjin's most toxic trait is something that has been forced upon him in his career. He is convinced that everyone, especially the public has to think that he is perfect.
The perfect man, the perfect idol, the perfect boyfriend. This sometimes causes huge strains in your relationship because you can't tell what is real and what is a facade that he is putting on for the public eye.
You and Hyunjin are on a date and got into a small argument. It wasn't even an argument as much as you were just bickering with each other. He had picked this Italian restaurant and the portions were huge so you two decided it would he best to split a dish. However you couldn't decide and started to bicker back and forth between two dishes, trying to decide which to get.
"We can literally make that at home, Hyunjin. We should get something that we can only have in an authentic restaurant like this," you try to reason and Hyunjin rolls his eyes.
"You already decided on white wine, which doesn't go with the dish you want at all," he replies and you throw your hands up a little in frustration.
"Whatever, Hyunjin. Get what you want," you snap at him and before he can snap back at you, the waitress walks up to the table. He plasters a huge fake smile on his face and tells her the order, getting what he wanted and the white wine that you wanted.
"Now everyone is happy. Stop being a crybaby," he mumbles and you scoff, pulling out your phone. Your Twitter is getting notifications and you open the app.
Someone had taken a video of you and Hyunjin in the past ten minutes and posted it to Twitter. It already had over 1000 likes and you laugh at the video.
It showed Hyunjin saying something to you before you roll your eyes and fall back into your seat, crossing your arms. Then Hyunjin runs a hand through his hair, obviously annoyed.
"What's funny?" Hyunjin's voice pulls you from the video and you look up, turning your phone to face him. The smile on your face drops when you take in Hyunjin's face, obviously not amused with the video.
His jaw clenches and he clears his throat before turning in the direction that the video seemed to be taken from. The person recording was obviously long gone and he turns back to face you, a sigh leaving his mouth.
"What's wrong?" you ask, putting your phone away and resting your chin in your hand to look at your boyfriend.
"Nothing's wrong," he mumbles and you let out a small chuckle. You already know what's wrong. You reach for Hyunjin's hand across the table and he lets you grab it.
"Jinnie, relax. It's okay! There's nothing wrong with us disagreeing from time to time. It's natural and everyone likes seeing this real and raw side of you. You know that," you try to reason and he nods as the waitress approaches the table with a bottle of wine and two glasses.
The waitress pours your wine and neither you or your boyfriend say anything besides a small 'thank you' and even after she leaves, the silence between the two of you remain. You take a sip from your glass and look over to Hyunjin. He is zoned out, his finger tracing the rim of the glass and he's focused on something on the table.
"What's going on in that pretty little head of your's?" You finally break the silence and Hyunjin's eyes shoot up to meet yours immediately.
"That looks like we don't like each other," he mutters in a small voice, not much more than a whisper. You let out a sigh and adjust in your seat, uncrossing your legs and leaning towards your boyfriend. Before you can say anything, he's shaking his head at you.
"Stop it. Your body language is weird. Now we know someone is watching us, we need to act like we like each other," he speaks up, his eyes darting around the restaurant. You feel a little pang in your chest at his words and suck in a sharp breath.
"Act like we like each other?" You inquire, an eyebrow raised. He shoos you with his hand, still looking around the room.
"You know what I mean, y/n. Let's not start a scene. We have already caused one," he dismisses you and you scoff, taking the napkin from your lap and slamming it on the table.
"Whatever, Hyunjin. I'll give them something to spectate about," you spit at him and stand from the table. You grab your belongings and turn, making a beeline for the door. You barely hear Hyunjin calling in a whisper yell behind you before you reach the door and pull out your phone, ready to call a cab.
Han: Wandering eyes
Your first thought when you get to your house is to turn on the T.V. and see your stunning boyfriend at his award show. Your relationship was still under wraps so you weren't allowed to join him at his award show, at least not yet. You turn on the T.V. and realize you missed their red carpet so you take to Twitter to see what you missed.
Before you can even type his name into the search bar, you see that under trending is your boyfriend's name. He must have looked really good if he's trending away from his group. You click on the 'Han Jisung' hashtag and your heart immediately drops.
He wasn't trending because of how good he looks, he's trending because he was caught by a million cameras checking out another idol. Bile creeps its way into your throat and the tears spring to your eyes before you can even stop them.
This may seem like an overreaction to most, but this is not the first time that your boyfriend has been trending for his wandering eyes and flirty behavior. Just a week ago you two had gotten in a huge fight about how just because you're a secret, doesn't mean he needs to act single.
You thought that it got through to him but it obviously went in one ear and right out of the other. You lock your phone and frustratedly slam it down on the couch beside you. You let out a groan and let your head fall into your hands.
"Han fucking Jisung," you whisper out to yourself. You fall back against the couch and cross your arms over your chest before deciding to train your eyes on the ceiling. It only lasts about a minute until tears have started running down your face.
About two hours later, you hear the front door of your apartment open and you roll over in bed, not ready to explain to your boyfriend why your eyes are so puffy and red. He obviously didn't go to the after party so that gives you a little reassurance, but not much.
"Baby? Are you asleep?" you hear your boyfriend's voice and pull the blanket tighter around your chin before shaking your head. You hear him make his way over to the bed and he places a kiss to the side of your head. He smells like his shampoo and soap which means he either showered at the venue or went home before coming to see you.
"Did you watch the show?" he asks and you feel all of your emotions over the situation bubble to the surface. You let out a scoff.
"No, Jisung. I was too busy scrolling through your trending video from a million different angles," you reply coldly. He doesn't seem to pick up on your tone well and settles in the bed behind you.
"I'm trending?" there is pure excitement in his voice and you almost feel bad for him. Almost. You sit up straight in the bed and turn to face him. His bare face is illuminated by the faint glow of street lights outside your window and he really does look stunning. If you weren't so upset with him, you would surely be jumping his bones.
"Yeah. You're trending. Not for what you, your company, or your devoted girlfriend would like you to be trending for, however," you snap at him and grab your phone from the side table. You pull up his name under trending and toss your phone at him.
He flips it and you see him obviously scrolling through the tweets. His eyebrows are dropped in focus before they relax and a small smirk takes over his face, making your jaw drop.
"Does this make you happy, Jisung?" you question, hostility dripping from your tone. His eyes dart up to yours before they're back on the phone again. You glance over at your screen and see that he is watching a video of himself that is from an angle that you can see the exact asset he was assessing on the singer.
"You have got to be kidding me," you snarl at him and stand from the bed, ready to sleep in the living room.
"What? Can you blame me? She has a nice-"
"You have a girlfriend!" you interrupt him, your tone much more hostile than you intended and he's slightly taken aback.
"I know! I'm a guy. What do you expect?" his absurd defense just pisses you off more and you can't help clenching your jaw. He locks your phone and throws it onto the bed next to you.
"You are unbelievable." You spit before storming out of the room.
Felix: Belittling you/making you feel inferior
You sigh again. Your work computer has been acting up and you have done everything you can to try to make it work. You're trying your absolute best to not have to resort to calling your IT desk at work, but it seems to be your only option.
"That's one sigh too many. What's eating you?" you hear your boyfriend's voice behind you, giving you some comfort but frustration still racks your body.
"My computer is being dumb and I really don't want to have to call IT. I've tried everything I can think of and it still won't work!" you exclaim out, slamming your hands down on the desk. You feel his hands start to massage your shoulders and a gentle kiss is placed to your temple, obviously trying to calm you down.
"I just don't know what to do, Lix. On top of that, I have a report that I need to present on Friday!" you complain again and tilt your head back to look at Felix. He turns his attention from the computer screen down to you and presses a quick kiss to your lips.
"Do you want me to have a look at it?" He asks and you shake your head before sitting back up to look at the screen again.
"In all honesty, I just want to go to bed and not even think about this mess anymore," you confess and rest your head in the palm of your hand.
"Have you tried plugging it in?" Felix asks and you have to stop yourself from rolling your eyes at him. You were already frustrated and you don't want to be sent over the edge and snap at your boyfriend.
"Yes, Felix. I tried to plug it in," you reply but the exasperation in your voice is impossible to miss. You run your hand through the front of your hair and sit back up again, ready to try a few more things so you can work on your project.
"Have you tried restarting it?" It was meant to come out as a helpful question but you can't stop the scoff that leaves your mouth in response.
"I'm not an idiot, Felix," you snap at him but he doesn't say anything else for a few beats of silence.
"Did you put it to sleep or hard reset it? Do you know the difference?" he asks and you turn in your chair immediately to face him. Maybe it was the underlying belittling in his tone that sends you over the edge but you all but spit out your next response.
"Actually, Felix, I do know the difference and you are so not being helpful at all right now and in all honesty, you're pissing me the fuck off," you stare at your boyfriend, who is obviously taken aback by your outburst.
"How am I pissing you off?" he questions and you stand, letting out a humorless laugh. You turn and close your laptop before making your way over to your bed.
"You keep talking to me like I'm some kind of idiot. I'm not dumb, y'know? You always do this if you think you know more than me about a topic," you rant and he raises an eyebrow at you, still confused. You roll your eyes and slide under the blanket, turning your back to him.
"Whatever, Felix. Goodnight," you snap but it doesn't take long for you to feel the bed behind you dip from his weight.
"Don't go to sleep mad, angel," he reaches out to touch your shoulder but you shake his hand off. You turn to face him and regret fills your body at the face he is giving you. He looks like a guilty puppy and you let out a sigh. You lean over and press a quick kiss to his pouty lips before pulling back.
"I'm not mad. I'm just..." you pause, searching the ceiling for the right word, "Annoyed, frustrated, tired. I just want to go to sleep and we can talk in the morning. Sound good?" you try to reason and he nods but the sad puppy look is still plastered on his face.
Seungmin: Cruel
Seungmin loves you. So much. More than he has loved anyone else before. He knows it, you know it, his friends and family know it. However, sometimes he isn't as nice to you as he probably should be.
It isn't always what he is saying or his actions, as much as it's his tone. Today is one of Seungmin's more unkind days and you noticed it as soon as you woke up. He spent the night at your house last night so it was nice to see your boyfriend first thing in the morning.
He is always up before you and today was just like any other day. When you open your eyes, they're met with the chocolate ones of your adorable boyfriend. You hug him a little closer and he grumbles at you, his morning cranky still evident.
"Good morning," you whisper out, leaning up to press a kiss to his jaw line. He mumbles back a quiet response and you try to pull him closer to you, wanting to savor the cuddle a bit more but Seungmin's body stiffens, pushing you away.
" 'S too hot," he groans and pushes you away completely, getting up from bed. You whine at him and he chuckles slightly, heading towards the bathroom. You get up and follow him, running your nails up his back.
"I love you," you speak out again, voice still raspy, before placing a soft kiss to the nape of his neck. You want so badly to wrap your arms around his waist and relish in his warmth for a little longer but you refrain.
Seungmin glances at you through the mirror and you stare back, waiting for him to mirror the same words back to you. He puts his toothbrush in his mouth and a frown finds its way onto your lips. He notices and pulls his toothbrush from him mouth.
"Love you too," he shortly replies and it stings a little. Not only did he not say 'I' but the response was robotic, rehearsed. It felt like it was what he was supposed to say more than an expression of his feelings. It seemed like he didn’t even want to admit he loved you in all honesty.
Later that same day, you find him on the couch and plop down next to him. He glances over at you then back to the T.V. again so you scoot closer. He has been neglecting you all day and you finally found the perfect opportunity to cuddle up with your boyfriend.
You silently hoped that a good cuddle would make up for him hurting your feelings earlier and would offer you some much needed reassurance. You wrap your arm around your boyfriend's arm and place your cheek on his shoulder. You immediately feel him shift away from you and your heart drops.
"Do you have to sit so close to me? I don't feel like being touched right now," his evident irritation is enough to make tears want to spring to your eyes. It makes you want to curl up into a ball and cry out of embarrassment and the rejection of your boyfriend.
"You're being mean," you mumble out as you push away from him and settle onto the other side of the couch, turning your attention to the T.V. instead.
"How am I being mean? Maybe you're just being too sensitive," he shrugs before standing from the couch and grabbing his glass from the coffee table.
"Seungmin," you warn but he doesn't listen, instead walking into the kitchen to refill his glass. Your eyes burn with the tears that are begging to spill so you stand and decide to go take a shower to cry by yourself.
"Where are you going?" Seungmin's voice rings behind you and you feel the first tear fall so you decide its best not to turn around.
"Shower," you mumble out and continue walking towards your bathroom. You can't help the sniffle you let out as more tears fall and you quickly step into the bathroom and turn the shower water on as more tears fall from your eyes.
I.N: Gets distant
"How is Innie doing?" Your best friend asks over the phone and you bite down on your lip. She knows when you're lying and will call you out on it so you opt for a more neutral answer.
"Busy. How is your boyfriend?" you quickly try to change the topic but she is much smarter than you're giving her credit for and doesn't let you switch the conversation.
"He's doing it again, isn't he?" she questions, her voice full of sympathy and you can't stop the sigh that leaves your lips. Too ashamed to admit out loud that your boyfriend has went distant on you again, you just nod.
"Babe, you can't keep letting him do this to you! You need to put your foot down," she insists over the phone, obviously frustrated with your boyfriend's antics. It may seem like you aren't frustrated to everyone else, but that couldn't be further from the truth
You hate when Jeongin decides to disappear and not talk to you for days on end. You hate when he comes back and acts like nothing happened. You hate how defensive he gets when you call him out on it. You hate it.
You open your mouth to reply when you hear your lock code being punched into your door. You sit up on the couch as soon as the door opens, revealing a very tired looking Jeongin.
"Hold on. I'll call you tomorrow, okay? We spoke him up," you look at your best friend through the screen and she shakes her head muttering a quick 'love you, make good decisions' then ending the call. You look over at your boyfriend and he walks towards the couch, immediately crawling in between your legs and placing his head on your chest.
His arms wrap around your waist and you let out a sigh, laying back on the couch so your boyfriend can lay on you. You reach up and run a hand through his hair, getting a whiff of his shampoo.
"I missed you," he mutters against your chest and squeezes you a little tighter. You let out a breathy chuckle.
"And whose fault is that?" you reply quietly, still working your fingers through the tangles in his hair. He stiffens a bit on top of you then turns his head to rest his chin on your chest. You lock eyes and feel like you could melt into him.
"I've been busy," he tries to excuse but barely a beat passes before you reply.
"You could've told me," this is usually how these conversations go. You would let him reply at this point but your best friend's words are ringing through your ears, 'you need to put your foot down'. So you take a deep breath and speak again before he gets the chance.
"It's been a week, Jeongin. I haven't gotten a text, a call, a visit, nothing. It has been seven days. You do know you're my boyfriend, right?" you ask and his eyes drop for a second before meeting yours again.
"I said I've been busy," he repeats himself and you shake your head, sitting up and forcing him to sit up as well.
"I said you could've told me. How hard would it be to take 30 seconds from your busy schedule to send me a text and tell me you're busy or you miss or you love me or...anything at all!" you finish the sentence, throwing your hands in the air.
"Why are you being so demanding? You know distance makes the heart grow fonder," he tries to defend himself once again and you scoff. You stand from the couch, moving to the chair to try to create space between the two of you.
"Don't try this bullshit with me, Yang Jeongin. If you don't want to be together anymore then let me know now. Don't disappear on me and claim you need space. We're adults. Act like it," you point an accusatory finger at him and he stands, now towering over your seated figure.
"Why are you trying to force me to break up with you? Do you not want to be together anymore?" he flips the question on you, anger in his voice. You open your mouth to answer but honestly, you don't even know the answer. So you tell him just that.
"Honestly, Innie, I don't even know anymore," you whisper out, looking down at your hands. You're picking at your fingers as silence falls on the room. Then before you know it, Jeongin's knees buckle and he's on his knees in front of you, his face in his hands and his body shaking with the violence of his sobs.
"I-I," he tries to speak but you stop him, dropping to your knees as well and pressing your forehead to his. You let your eyes fall closed as his tears soak your hands. Before you know it, tears are leaving your eyes as well.
"I don't want to break up," he whispers out and your eyes open to find his already trained on yours. You let silence fall between you two for a minute, just looking into each others eyes before you let out a sigh.
"I think you should leave," you finally speak up, breaking the silence.
970 notes · View notes
stayteezdreams · 7 months
Text
Spoiled With Love
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Plot: Chris decides the best way to spend your birthday is by spoiling you as much as he can
Pairing: Christopher/Bang Chan x Gn!Reader
Requested by @thunderous-wolf
Warnings(?): Use of pet-names and a lot of fluff
Words: 1.4k
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You rushed to the door with glee before yanking it open. Your smile turned to amusement as Chris stood at your doorstep, arms full with various bags and boxes.
"Wha- Chris, this seems like a lot more than just breakfast."
Even while struggling Chris had a bright smile on his face. "It's your birthday, I'm spoiling you!"
Moving aside as he came in, you let out a chuckle, "It's too much Chris!"
He giggled, "It's not all breakfast, it's other stuff too, which you will find out about later."
Placing everything down on the kitchen counter he grinned before turning to you. Stepping forward he pressed a kiss to your forehead, then to your cheek, then to your nose, before finally kissing you on the lips.
When he pulled away you grinned at each other. "Happy Birthday baby."
You smiled before pecking his lips in return. "Thank you."
Grabbing you by your shoulders, he spun you around before leading you towards the living room. "Now, go hang out in the living room while I set things up."
"What? Don't you want help?"
"Nope, it needs to be a surprise."
"But-"
He plopped you down on the couch before pointing a finger in warning at you. "No buts! And no peeking."
You pouted before a smile broke out, "Fine, I'll wait here."
He grinned and nodded before running back into the kitchen happily, making you giggle.
Not long passed before you heard the sound of toppling objects and a few whispered curses. You peered towards the kitchen before calling out.
"You sure you don't need help?"
"Everything's fine!" He yelled back, obviously panicked, making you roll your eyes and chuckle under your breath.
Your stomach was filled with butterflies as you wondered what exactly Chris was doing. He always tried to spoil you, especially on occasions like birthdays. And as many times as you told him there was no need, it always made you feel special.
A hundred tik-toks later, and the smell of food filling the living room making you hungry, Chris finally appeared, a bit breathless but smiling. "Alright, it's ready!"
You grinned as you stood up, taking his hand that he had reached out towards you. As you followed him into the kitchen, you grinned at the sight in front of you.
Lied out across the kitchen counter were trays of various foods. Pastries and fruit you could tell came from somewhere expensive, your favorite breakfast foods, and coffee all set up for the two of you to enjoy.
At the edge of the table sat a beautiful bouquet of flowers, balloons, a large card and a few bag and boxes you figured were the presents you told him not to spend too much on.
Turning to Chris you hugged him, "Thank you, I love it. It all looks so great!"
He pecked your nose, "I'm glad. The card is signed by all of the guys."
You smiled as you looked over at the card.
"And the presents are for later." He added on.
You let out a dramatic gasp, "What so I get to look at them, but not open them?"
He nodded and you pouted, "Mean."
He chuckled, "Lets eat before it gets cold okay?"
You nodded as you sat own, his hand resting on your leg as you picked at various foods.
"Where are these from?" You asked with a groan as you ate a delicious scone.
"Not telling!"
You glared at him, knowing it was because he didn't want you to know how much he had spent on you.
"But it's so good, I might want to get some more!"
"I'll buy you as many as you want." He countered and you playfully glared at him, making him chuckle.
You quickly gave up, knowing you wouldn't win and read through all of the messages from the boys in the card as you ate. You smiled at each message and joke, and felt your chest grow warm.
When you were full from all of the food, you helped pack up the rest of the pastries and fruit for later. Suddenly, Chris wrapped his arms around you from behind and you grinned before you squeezed his arms with your hands.
"Okay, you can open one present, but just one okay?"
You grinned at him and nodded. "Do I get to pick?"
He nodded and you waddled over to the presents as he remained attached to you.
He giggled as you hummed, trying to decide which one to open first. Grabbing the biggest box, you drug it towards you and he chuckled.
"I knew you'd go for that one."
When you finally got the box open, you found it was full of all of your favorite teas. Some bags, some loose leaf. You grinned and looked over at him.
"These are all my favorites!"
"Of course they are!" He said with a grin, "Any time you tell me something is your favorite I make sure to remember it."
You felt warmth fill you as you pressed a kiss to his cheek. "You're too sweet. Thank you."
He caressed the side of your face, "You're welcome baby. I love you. Do you want to have some before we go?"
"Go?" You asked perplexed and you saw realization cross his features.
"Did I not tell you we were going out?" You shook your head and he hissed, "Oops."
"Chris!" You said half-serious as you lightly smacked his shoulder.
"Sorry sorry! But I promise you'll enjoy it okay?"
You hummed under your breath, as excitement secretly coursed through you.
The surprise trip consisted of an hour long drive filled with laughter and karaoke. When you arrived, it was at a large and beautiful nature park. You walked, and talked, took photos, ate ice cream, saw various animals, and had some drinks at an outdoor cafe before having lunch at a nearby restaurant Chris had reserved previously.
You climbed back in the car after a few hours, a few trinkets and a plush Chris bought you in hand, ready for the ride back home. Which seemed to pass much quicker than the ride there, though you weren't sure if you preferred that or not.
By the time you had gotten home, you were already starting to build up an appetite for dinner, which you knew would be shared with the others, who planned to come by later to celebrate with you.
Chris had told you previously, that the day was just for you and him, while the evening could be with everyone. You were perfectly okay with the idea, as you loved nothing more than spending time with Chris. And so far your birthday had been perfect.
Back home, you sat down on the couch as Chris ran off to the kitchen. You were confused by this, until he came back out with your presents in hand.
He grinned at you, "Time for prezzies!"
"Prezzies?" You asked with a laugh and he just chuckled.
In the first two presents, there was cute stationary for your office, and some of your favorite fragrances. The next two presents made you feel more emotional however.
The first was a jacket that matched one of his. It was one you adored, but often complained about being too big for you to properly wear.
When you pulled it on, his familiar smell washed over you. "You sprayed it with your cologne?"
He nodded with a smile "So it'll be like you're wearing mine."
You grinned, kissing him on the cheek. He slid over the last present, something in a small bag. Inside was a beautiful bracelet, as you admired it, Chris pulled up his own sleeve, to reveal he was wearing a matching one.
"You got us couple bracelets?" You grinned, feeling a bit emotional.
Chris noticing this, cooed at you before pulling you into his chest, "So cute." He teased.
"Shhh" You shushed him but wrapped your arms round his neck and pressed another kiss to his cheek. "I love it Chris, I love everything, thank you."
"You're welcome baby."
"I love you."
"I love you too."
The rest of the evening went just as well, when the boys showed up with their loud cheers and various out-of-tune birthday songs. You received various presents from them, ranging from a painting by Hyunjin, to a creepy doll from Lee Know that you were certain was haunted.
To end the night, Chris brought out a beautiful cake for you that he had apparently hid in the fridge to surprise you.
You couldn't feel more special, spoiled, or happy than today, and you knew it was all because of Chris. Well, and a little bit because of the boys, but you'd never give them too much credit, you'd never hear the end of it
xx End xx
<3 <3
General Taglist: @otsilliak
Stray Kids Taglist: @laylasbunbunny, @skz1-4-3, @prettymiye0n
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hannieehaee · 6 months
Text
18+ / mdi
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content: chan's a fucking loser (not rlly he just rlly likes u <33), smut, f reader, handjob, sub!chan
wc: 884
part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4
masterlist
loser!chan whose eyes indiscreetly stick to you whenever you're in the same room. the halls, the cafeteria, gym, your shared chemistry class. you name it. all his friends (and yours) notice his hopeless stares while you do mundane tasks around school, except you.
or that's what everyone thinks
what he doesnt know, however, is how your eyes are looking back at him whenever he takes a quick break to look away in the name 'subtlety.' this endless cycle finally comes to an end when fate (your chemistry teacher) manages to put you in the same room alone with him.
"hey .. are you okay?", you ask after a good ten minutes of fruitless one-sided conversation as beet-red chan avoids eye contact while sitting on your bed.
due to an act by the gods above, you and chan ended up in the same group for a chemistry assignment. 'group' putting it lightly as its just you and chan alone in your room attempting to work out the assignment together.
getting him here was a miracle in itself, seeing as he would not make eye contact as you tried to come up with possible meeting times that worked for the both of you (surprise, he had an open schedule to meet whenever you desired)
after spluttering for a few seconds, chan comes to his senses and finally makes contact with your gaze when he replies to your question.
"me? oh! i- yes, sorry, just trying to work out the assignment," he responds, looking away immediately after.
"chan," you call out again, "look at me."
he powers through the effort that it takes to keep his eyes on yours for more than a few seconds, "y-yes?"
seeing his anxiety-ridden responses and lack of confidence when speaking the shortest of statements to you does something to your confidence, emboldening you to scoot closer to him and begin creeping your hand towards him.
"channie .. can i call you that? channie?", you put on your sweetest voice to ask.
"m-me? oh. yes. call me whatever you want," he somehow manages to splutter even more, his skin heating up at the unexpected pet name.
your hand creeps further towards his thigh as your body leans towards him even more.
his semi-crossed legs seem to naturally unwind themselves at the proximity of your hand, eager for whatever his years-long crush seems to have in mind for him.
"is it okay if i touch you channie?", you question, hand now in his upper thigh, gracing back and forth lightly.
"o-oh," he breathes, "are you sure? i- ive never-"
"its okay, channie," you interrupt, "just say the word and i'll stop. but i think it could be good for your nerves? dont you think?", you reason, scooting up enough for your chest to grace against his shoulder.
"y-yeah .. maybe ..." he breathes out as he closes his eyes when your hand finally makes contact with the spot in his pants thats been burning since you first welcomed him into your bed, originally sitting across from him in the tiniest shorts known to man (at least according to chan).
you place your empty hand on his warm cheek, directing his eyes towards you, "channie~ why wont you look at me?", you pout, "you stare at me all day but when i have you in my bed you wont look my way? thats so mean ..." you trail off, sticking your hand in his pants, feeling around before you finally wrap your hand around his aching length.
"ah ..." he moans. "you saw that? i'm sorry, youre just so- oh-" he cuts himself off as you speed up the pace of your touches, enjoying the way in which his head falls to your shoulder, one of his hands reaching to hold onto your arm in a fruitless attempt to try and keep a hold of his composure.
"shh, it's okay baby, i understand. feels too good to even look at me, doesnt it?", you interrupt in a mocking tone.
"i think- oh, i think i'm gonna cum. god, please ..." he lets out as he continuously lets out warm puffs of air into your neck as he nears his end far too soon.
"already?", you giggle. "oh, channie, you must be so deprived, you poor thing," you grin at him as you direct his face towards yours with your free hand.
"please .. please'" he breathes against your mouth, close enough to kiss but not enough. "please just let me. i'll do anything. anything."
you drip at his unwarranted (but very much appreciated) begging, almost feeling bad at the sudden desire to deny him just to extend the experience even longer, but his heavy breathing against your mouth and the wetness of his dick on your hand begin to make you delirious, licking into his open mouth as you give him the greenlight to cum.
"thank you. fuck, t-thank you," he continues to breathe as you shove your tongue into his mouth while he reaches his peak, attempting to catch your tongue in his.
finally, you peck his lips as he recovers from his high. grinning at his useless attempts to kiss back while he catches his breath.
"feeling less nervous now?", you giggle after a while of staring at his boneless form as he tries to process what just happened
a/n: this is my first time writing smut ever so any feedback is appreciated c: thank u for reading hehe (this was not proofread btw 😭)
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