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crow-stars · 1 year

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❝CHOCOLATE KISSES, VALENTINE'S WISHES❞

❦summary; as the day of st. valentine approaches near, one can wonder how the students of nrc plan to celebrate

♪the characters in this story; riddle rosehearts, azul ashengrotto, jade leech, floyd leech, kalim al-asim, jamil viper, silver, gn!reader

✎word count; ~3,755

❀what do the ghosts say?; romantic relationships, bullet point format, giving of chocolates and other sweets, blushing/flustered students

☛the author's notes; nothing to note...

☪look at the catalogue?

❝RIDDLE ROSEHEARTS❞

♡ cough stunted child cough

♡ Riddle has never experienced a valentine’s in his life, I’m sure of it.

♡ We all know that Riddle wasn’t allowed anything sweet like candy and wasn’t even given the luxury of a proper birthday cake

♡ So we can probably assume that stuff like valentine’s day? Boy knows basically nothing about it

♡ Riddle’s probably gonna get a bit of whiplash when he gets cards and chocolates for the first time

♡ He’s definitely someone who gets stuff more than receiving them. That doesn’t mean he won’t get anyone anything, but it’ll be something on the smaller side

♡ When he first got a card, he thought for a second it was some type of love confession because of the pink cover and hearts across it. He questioned the person and everything, who was very confused, before leaving

♡ Had to have card giving and what happens during valentine’s basically explained to him by Trey and now that’s a prominent memory in his mind

♡ But, now that he’s more well versed, Riddle doesn’t get surprised by cards anymore and just accepts them with a light smile

♡ Now, when getting a card from you, he’s going to be grateful about it and then thank you before going on his way. Maybe if he’ll invite you for tea later on, just as a special type of thanks

♡ When the words are just something you’d see on a usual valentine’s card, Riddle will express his thanks to you.

“I’d like to thank you for the card you’ve given me. Your words mean a lot to me and the decoration on the front is quite cute. If you’d like, you can join me for tea later on.”

♡ If the card is sweeter in words and more romantic in theme, Riddle will flush red like the brightest rose and words are going to get stuck on his tongue

“H-How... ah, what’s the word? Ch-Charming? What, flustered? Of course not, it’s just— Don’t look at me like that, I’m not flustered!”

♡ I feel like he’d have a valentine’s tea party, not on unbirthday party scale, but definitely something the dorm gets excited for.

♡ And, just for this one day, he’ll allow a small lax in the rules

♡ Now, if he’s spending the day with a lover, the day will be planned down to the smallest detail

♡ He’ll meet you at your dorm at the beginning of the day and greet you with a bouquet of roses

♡ Riddle is going to be very romantic towards you throughout the day, so expect lots of loving gazes, maybe a few pecks on the cheek, and random ‘i love you’s during the day

♡ He’s not going to be completely suave and smooth with it though, he’s still going to have a small blush as he does all this. Gotta remember that he’s not the best at romance stuff, so just go along with any slip ups! (b ᵔ▽ᵔ)b

♡ Definitely would ask Trey for help on making something for you, if he aims to. Doesn’t want a repeat of the oyster sauce tart from the unbirthday party

♡ The treat will be super cute too, lots of pretty decorations and fit to your tastes

♡ You two will also have a tea party to yourselves in the rose garden, sitting close to one another as you spend the last moments of the day with each other <3

❝RUGGIE BUCCHI❞

♡ Oh he relishes in valentine’s

♡ It’s probably one of Ruggie’s top holidays for many reasons

♡ Valentine’s means lots of people needed someone to be an errand runner, which means some extra cash in his pocket, and lots of goodies and sweets for him

♡ To be honest, I don’t think anybody is getting anything. Ruggie is going to get stuff and that’s it

♡ I bet that he’ll be running some service where he’ll deliver valentine’s cards and stuff

♡ And then working at the Mostro Lounge because they’re definitely running a promotion

♡ When Ruggie gets cards, he’s probably the type to look at what's inside first before actually reading the card

♡ Granted, when you give him one, he’ll still thank you, but Ruggie won’t apologize if he seems a bit greedy. Once he has what he wants he’ll read what’s inside

“Shyeheehee, I wonder what’s inside? Ooh, a gift card! Nice! Eh? Did I read what’s inside? No. Lemme do that though...”

♡ If what he reads is more romantic, he might value the card almost as much as what’s inside. Almost.

“Oooh, such sweet words huh? Makes me almost like the card more than the gift card. Maybe I’ll even give you a discount for my services, haha!”

♡ He’ll keep the card for a while afterwards and read it on any bad days he has

♡ Ruggie will probably send back all the treats to home and share with the neighborhood kids, like he does with christmas break

♡ If he gets any flowers, Ruggie probably won’t do much with it, maybe sniff it a bunch if they smell especially nice. The other stuff is going to be used as compost or something of that nature

♡ Valentine’s won’t be super different if you’re Ruggie’s partner, but it’ll be different too

♡ He’ll be busy throughout the day, so no long moments together on that day.

♡ Perhaps some chaste kisses if he manages to run into you, a brief nuzzle if the two of you are lucky

♡ I think that Ruggie would make you the exception to his ‘all get, no give’ valentine’s rule

♡ Ruggie will definitely save up to get you something good, take up a few more shifts at his jobs if the thing he wants to but for you is a bit pricier

♡ But you’re going to be gifted that item, whether it be a necklace, a nice box of chocolates, or a customized flower bouquet, you’ll be getting it

♡ Once the hectics of the day is over, you will be getting peppered with kisses and affection

♡ And once you’re both settled on the couch with a warm blanket, the two of you will be sorting through all the stuff Ruggie got like it’s Halloween trading time and then eat the spoils together <3

❝AZUL ASHENGROTTO❞

♡ *with a top hat, fancy glasses, and a cigar* BUSINESS! if you understand this reference, kisses kisses ❤ (ɔˆз(ˆ⌣ˆc)

♡ Anyway, Azul will be milking valentine’s with so many promos, coupons, so many

♡ He’d probably be running a valentine gram service, if the school isn’t running one already

♡ Azul is going to be advertising the Mostro Lounge like crazy, you’ll be seeing posters literally everywhere

♡ Man will also probably be having a special menu of themed items

♡ Okay, but BUSINESS aside, Azul won’t be doing much on valentine’s

♡ He won’t really be giving much to anyone, that’s for sure

♡ But he’d be really surprised if he gets a card and it’s not some joke from the tweels or a card from his mom

♡ I like to think that his mom would get Azul little cards for valentine’s since he was a kid, so even in NRC, she’ll still send him something

♡ Anyway, getting anything from anyone else is going to fluster the poor mer, but I think it’ll be a little boost to his self esteem

♡ Once getting a card from you, he’ll keep up appearances and still be professional. (he will give you a coupon)

“Ah, a card! How nice of you. Here, I believe I should give you something in return. Yes, it’s a coupon for the Mostro Lounge, make sure to come!”

♡ But, if your card to him is going to be very sweet and romantic, a blush is going to spread across his face and that professional exterior will crack

“E-Ehem. Yes, I’ve read your card. It’s v-very... mmm— gi-give me a moment.”

♡ Azul keeps all the cards he gets, even the joke ones Floyd and Jade get him from time to time. I just think he likes to read any cards he gets and relive the memories that are attached to each card

♡ First time he got chocolates from someone, I’m sure that Azul got a bit teary eyed

♡ He doesn’t eat all of the chocolate, he has a diet that he keeps to. But he’ll eat some as a treat for all his hard work and give the rest to Floyd and Jade, since they also deserve some treats

♡ I think Azul is someone who actually really likes chocolate covered fruits, so he’d definitely prefer gifts like that

♡ Spending valentine’s with Azul as his partner, however, will be quite different for both him and how he runs the lounge

♡ He’ll still be running the lounge promotions and all that, it’s just that he’s going to have a special spot reserved for the both of you later on in the night.

♡ Azul is going to go all out and be like a proper gentleman, getting you flowers, chocolates, and a card that expresses his adoration for you

♡ Will be complimenting you throughout the day, like a lot

♡ There might be a bit of teasing from Jade and Floyd, but I’m sure it’ll be fine

♡ And when the dinner comes around, Azul is going to do his best to be romantic, trying to feed you your food, kissing your hand, caressing your cheek, everything

♡ The best part about the dinner? You both have the lounge to yourselves <3

❝JADE LEECH❞

♡ A menace; pt. 1

♡ He doesn’t really care for valentine’s, but he does think that it’s such a fun time to people watch

♡ I believe that both Jade and Floyd are on the neutral side of valentine’s. They don’t see a great purpose in the holiday, but don’t really mind it either

♡ And if the mood tries him, he’s going to be doing a bit of pranking, a forged love letter here, a single rose on someone’s desk there. The likes of stuff like that

♡ It won’t be on the scale of Floyd’s though, but I’ll get there when it’s his turn

♡ Anyway, Jade’s going to be busy helping out Azul with the promotions at the lounge, so there isn’t much else he’ll be doing during the day

♡ Though, a little personal headcanon of mine is that Jade watches soap operas that have super over dramatic romance plots. I dunno why and there’s no real reason for it, I’ll be honest, I just like to think it does and it’s fun

♡ Moving on, if Jade gets any freetime during the day, he’ll go and watch a soap opera or two

♡ Now, when getting cards, Jade’s not going to give much of a reaction to the giver of the card, but he’s going to find it amusing

“Ah, a letter. Hmm... How nice. What do I think about it? Well, wouldn’t you like to know.”

♡ If the letter is romantic, Jade’s going to get that rare surprised face of his, eyebrows raising and eyes widening a fraction. But then that sharp grin of his will spread

“Oh my, your letter is quite romantic. Ehehe, this is quite a welcome surprise.”

♡ He’s going to be teasing you quite a bit once getting your card, whether romantic or not

♡ Now to switch to partner stuff!

♡ Jade is definitely, most likely going to give you some type of plant or mushroom as a gift with a little note

♡ Chocolates? Nah. Bouquet of flowers? Nope. Mushroom

♡ Will definitely walk around with a hand on you somewhere like your hip, holding your hand, anything like that.

♡ I think he’d also be one to take you out on a date on Valentine’s

♡ Maybe a niche little cafe, or a nice picnic in the botanical gardens

♡ Though, he’d probably do an inside date rather than a date out in public, that would fit Jade more

♡ Oh wait, maybe a beach date! That’d be very romantic! Wading in the water together or swimming if you’re in the mood

♡ Yes, beach date with Jade, final answer

♡ Definitely would still be a picnic though

♡ And as the sun sets, the two of you will be relaxing together on the picnic <3

❝FLOYD LEECH❞

♡ A Menace; pt. 2 with a capital M

♡ Also doesn’t really care for the holiday, thinks it’s just boring

♡ Like Jade, he’ll play jokes on people during the holiday, but as I said before, he’ll take it a step further

♡ Like, Floyd will be leaving purposely messily written loves letters that no one will be able to decipher and it’ll be just a whole day for a lot of people trying to figure out where those letters came from

♡ He loves to watch it all go down to shit

♡ But for most of the day, Floyd will be wandering around, not much for him to do

♡ Even though Azul is trying to get him to come for his shift at the lounge because it’ll be busy

♡ But he actually really likes getting stuff like chocolates and other stuff from people, whether willingly or just doing it out of courtesy

♡ If he receives a card, Floyd’s going to think it’s pretty funny and will read the whole thing aloud, regardless of if it’s romantic or not

♡ Just imagine his grin after reading a whole letter from you outloud, Floyd’s face is going to feel like it’s splitting open

“Hey, look at you with your cheeks all puffed out! I should call you pufferfish now! Hahaha!”

♡ Even if your letter has more romantic words, he’s still going to read it aloud, but will be more physically affectionate with you

“Aaah, your card’s so cute~ I could just squeeze you until you pop! Eh, you don’t want me doing that? No fun...”

♡ Basically, after being given a card by you, he’s going to be clinging to you like a suckerfish. So good luck with that

♡ And Floyd is going to be especially clingy with you if he’s your boyfriend

♡ Surprisingly, he’s going to get you flowers and chocolates. From where? Don’t ask, but ignore that student over there

♡ Also, be prepared to get bitten a lot throughout the day. The other characters will give you kisses during the day, Floyd will give you bites during the day

♡ A little nip on your neck here, a chomp on your arm there, you know how it goes

♡ Floyd will also be carrying you for a majority of the day, you don’t have much choice

♡ But if you really want to, Floyd will take you out on a date and if he gets a few good couple of kisses, he’ll behave

♡ Though, what I think his ideal date would be staying inside with you and watching shit movies

♡ And then he can end the day with you in his arms <3

❝KALIM AL-ASIM❞

♡ Oh

♡ Ooooh boy

♡ Valentine’s is so hectic with this boy, lemme tell ya

♡ He’s going to be organizing so much shit to do, like there’s gonna a big party, a whole bunch of shit

♡ And Kalim has a whole line of gifts and treats lined up from everyone

♡ As everyone knows, Kalim’s gonna be a huge giver, so of course all the gifts he’s gonna get for his friends are really customized to their tastes

♡ Also expensive

♡ He’s also going to be throwing a party for the dorm to celebrate the day

♡ I think that Kalim would also make cards, but only for people he feels particularly close to

♡ And they’ll be super sweet too, like you gotta take a second to look between him and the card to properly register it all

♡ Getting a card from someone is going to get Kalim really happy and energetic and he’ll want to show his thanks immediately

“Oh, a card? For me? Ah, thank you so much! That reminds me, your gift is still at Scarabia. C’mon, let’s go!”

♡ But if he gets a romantic card, Kalim’s gonna be a bit flustered, but still keeping that energy up

“Aha, I love this one! Makes me feel really nice and warm... Thank you!”

♡ I think Kalim would definitely be that type to always give a lot to his friends, but when it comes to things being genuinely given to him, he gets super giddy about it :)

♡ Also someone who would like chocolate covered fruit. Or maybe one of those people who likes spicy sweet kind of things?

♡ I would like to tell you that, when you celebrate valentine’s with Kalim as his partner... get ready for a hectic day (ノ*°▽°*)

♡ Be thankful Jamil is there to rationalize with Kalim and get him to tone down, because that boy would have a whole parade if he was allowed to

♡ But, for you, he’ll tone the theatrics down and settle with smaller things

♡ He’s still going to give you a large bouquet of flowers in your room with a letter, that’ll be the only thing that Kalim will dig his heels in about

♡ You will be pampered and given the best of the best throughout the day

♡ Kalim will usually be lovey dovey with you, but valentine’s will only amplify this

♡ He’ll be relentlessly affectionate and refuse to let up. He’s going to be holding your hand any chance he gets, kissing you, hugging you.

♡ Congrats! You have a Kalim attached to your hip for today

♡ Don’t worry though, all of it will kind of wind down towards the end of the day

♡ Kalim will take you back to Scarabia and the two of you are going to be having dinner together

♡ Then, after dinner, a flying carpet ride should be in order <3

❝JAMIL VIPER❞

♡ Tired™

♡ He’s going to be a mess

♡ Realistically, Jamil is going to have to be dealing with Kalim today, so there won’t be a lot of time for himself on that day

♡ But, he deserves a break, so for this section, Jamil isn’t being overworked by Kalim on valentine’s! :D Aren’t I nice?

♡ Jamil will still be a bit tired on valentine’s

♡ There’s probably going to be a lot of cards and letters that are being sent to Kalim, so Jamil will be sorting through all that, as well as making sure that nothing Kalim receives is poisoned

♡ Because of all this, Jamil doesn’t have much time to truly enjoy the holiday

♡ I do think that he has some memories from when he was younger of getting cards at school and stuff, so I think Jamil likes looking back on those memories

♡ Jamil will just treat valentine’s as a normal type of day, he’s not going to be doing anything special

♡ Though, if he gets a card, he’s going to be a bit surprised, but I think more like a pleasant surprise for him

♡ Like, if it’s nice enough, Jamil will keep it for sure. Even if you get him one, I’m sure that he’ll mistake it for something for Kalim

“A card? You know that Kalim’s right th— for me? Oh, thank you, I guess.”

♡ Now, when getting a card that’s more romantic, Jamil will definitely try to pin it off as some mistake, even if his name is right there. But one can’t ignore the way his eyes refuse to look into your eyes (๑˘︶˘๑)

“Okay, now I know there must be some kind of mistake. You must have meant this for Kalim. No? Don’t lie— Don’t tell me to look in your eyes, I-I am..”

♡ Jamil isn’t used to being given much, so I don’t think he’d know how to respond other than trying to pin it off as a mistake or some ploy

♡ And yet he’ll still be feeling warm inside when he looks at the card

♡ Honestly, with Jamil as your partner, valentine’s spent with him won’t be that much different

♡ But he will be finding opportunities to rest with you at any chance he gets before having to leave

♡ I think that Jamil would make you something, like your favorite snack or a dish of his that he knows you like

♡ Just giving you something that he’s made with his own hands would make him feel happy

♡ You’ll probably giving to him more than him on valentine’s, though I think he does deserve it

♡ At the end of the day, Jamil’s just about ready to crash, but I think he’d love to crash into your arms haha see what i did there (´･ᴗ･ ` )

♡ The thing that Jamil would love to fall asleep to is you running your hands through his hair as he falls asleep <3

❝SILVER❞

♡ Hmm...

♡ I think, that for Silver, valentine’s doesn’t mean that much to him

♡ Lilia definitely would have tried to get Silver into it, as it’s a holiday that humans came up with, but he just won’t get into it

♡ Silver will get the gist of the holiday, but that’s it

♡ Regardless of this, Silver will do his best to participate in any valentine’s activities that may be offered, to sort of get into the spirit of the holiday

♡ Though Lilia is still going to be trying to get Silver to participate, even after all these years

♡ Definitely someone that’s a giver and will be making cards for people

♡ He won’t put a bunch of effort into stuff, maybe go to get some heart shaped lollipops and put a pretty ribbon around it

♡ But other than that, Silver’s day won’t be that different

♡ If Silver gets a card, I think that, first off, he’s going to be disoriented or just kind of staring at you

♡ Disoriented if you woke him up, but staring at you if you somehow managed to catch him while he was awake.

“Wh- huh? A card? Oh, thank you. Read it? G-Give me a second, let me get my bearings.”

♡ If and or when Silver reads the card and it’s a flowery, sweet type of card, I’m sure he’ll get pretty flustered

“Mmm... I like your card, it’s nice...”

♡ Either way, Silver’s still going to be a bit spacey, so give him some time, alright?

♡ Spending valentine’s with Silver as his partner will be a bit different, but not all that different

♡ Most of the activities done by the two of you will be pushed by Lilia

♡ Of course, Silver won’t be fully listening to his father’s advice, but he’ll keep some smaller bits in mind

♡ Like, he’s still going to get you some flowers, but a smaller bouquet and flowers he personally picked himself!

♡ His animal friends helped him find some good ones, so make sure to pet a squirrel or two

♡ And there’s going to be a date prepared as well and Silver’s going to be trying his damn hardest to stay awake

♡ But, at the end of the day, Silver is going to have you in his arms, napping with one another <3

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regular-lord-reckoner · 3 years

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i got a raise today !!

#it’s an extra 56 cents an hour so...i’ll take it!!#got my evaluation today and it was really good #all of the categories were on a scale from 1 to 10 and i got all nines #despite having no problems or areas to improve but that’s just one of those things #i did get a 9.25 for ‘taking on additional responsibilities’ so there’s that XD #cause holy shit yeah #once the first of the year is over i should have less on my plate #but we’ll see!#for now i’m just grateful for the extra cash :3

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rainy-day-coffee · 3 years

Note

May I request headcanons for Jade, Epel, Ruggie, Azul, and Lilia who have a crush on a very clumsy reader who tends to trip a lot on random things? (Btw I love ur writing!)

FIRST OFF-

Thank you so much!! TwT I’m so glad!

Second off, I hope you enjoy this! Jade’s part was especially fun to write!

A clumsy crush!

He's very amused to say the least

You may be his crush but you certainly aren’t safe from his teasing

"Ah yes, I remember when I first learned how to walk as well fufufu."

He may be a gentleman, but he is a mischievous gentleman all the same

He’ll be sure to keep an extra close eye on you, he can’t have you littered with bruises and cuts all the time. That simply won’t do

Would entrust your safety with Floyd but his brother tends to bring more trouble with him than help, so that option is not on the table

If at any moment you volunteer to help at Mostro Lounge as a part-timer, Jade will have you work the cash-register and only the cash-register. It’s not because you would most likely trip and ruin someone’s food, Floyd sometimes does it on purpose so that’s not the issue. He just doesn’t want you to potentially drop some glass and embed the pieces into your skin

When you point out the fact that he seems more present in your daily life, he won’t try and deny it

Jade’s an opportunist. He’ll see this as excuse to get closer to you

He’ll help you out of the goodness of his heart, but he does expect something in return for his “hard work.” Perhaps you’d be willing to accompany him on a date as a reward?

He’ll be sticking to you like glue from now on

Vil’s lessons can wait, he needs to make sure his crush doesn’t fall and hit a lamp post on their way to Ramshackle dorm

May or may not beg Rook to keep an eye on you as he’s dragged away to do some yoga

He’s never had a crush on someone around his own age before, he really isn’t sure what he can do to help you

Tries all sorts of things to get you as far away as possible from any and all dangerous situations! Need to get some lunch? He’ll do it! Carrying some items? He’ll do it for you! Teacher asked you to run an errand? He! Will! Do! It!

Speaking honestly, it may get to a point where you’ll need to sit with him and talk about it. Tell him you appreciate the help but are perfectly capable of taking care of yourself as well

He’ll still keep an eye on you, but it will be much less intense. He realizes that he underestimated you, and he, more than anyone, understands what that feels like

That being said, he will invite you more often to his “ditch-Vil-to-mess-around” moments! He hadn’t done so before out of worry

There’s a sort of metronome in his head; one side represents his constant worry for your well being, the other side assumes you know how to handle yourself. The pointer moves between both sides at rapids speeds until it short-circuits and stays on the “worry” side

At first he simply brushed off the fact that you fell about 3 times in the span of 4 hours. However, the next day you had tripped over nothing and nearly fell out a window. Thankfully, he caught you by the arm before it happened. Now this is when the alarms in his head started going off

He can’t do anything about your clumsy nature. However, he can do everything in his power to prevent you from being in dangerous situations

Will help you a lot without asking and will expect something in return too. You may be his crush but his give-and-take motto isn’t exactly easy to shake off. Don’t worry though! He won’t ask for too much, he simply wants you to help him study for an upcoming exam! He hasn’t worked up the courage to ask you out on a proper date yet so this will be the most he can do for a while

If you help him with his chores around the Savanaclaw dorm as another method of “payment,” he will be so grateful and probably fall a little more in love with every chore you two do together

On the outside, he is as calm as ever. On the inside, he is in a constant state of panic.

Seeing as he is almost always busy, he’ll entrust your wellbeing to Jade. He’ll be teased immensely for it but he’s willing to bear with it for your safety

One time, he tried to catch you as you tripped over the carpet in his office. He miscalculated and you both tumbled to the ground. You fell on top of him, much to his embarrassment. He turns red every time he remembers that instance

He would try getting you to sign a contract if it weren’t for the limits of his power and knowledge. No matter how you look at it, he can’t come up with a potion to help your situation. But he can still certainly try!

Will be nervous if you ask to work at Mostro Lounge. He doesn’t want you to get hurt while you serve food! If you insist enough, he’ll let you work. He’ll let you run the cash-register or make food and drinks in the back. He’ll be right there beside you to help!

Like Jade, he’s an opportunist. He’s been helping you so much lately! Surely that merits a nice dinner with you, correct?

.....He’s trying his best to pursue a romantic relationship with you, he just doesn’t have much experience

He finds it endearing!

He’s definitely one to tease you! He also has some snarky remarks saved for different occasions

"I suppose you're falling for me, my dear~"

“Lilia, I nearly fell down a flight of stairs.”

He’s worried for your well-being, of course. But as long as you’re near him, he can simply catch you with his bats at any time. He’d never let you get hurt on purpose!

It’s the moments when you’re not near that have him stressed. He can’t be close to you all the time because of his duties as vice dorm leader, and he certainly can’t force you to stay beside him either

Came up with a solution for it though! When he’s not around, one of the other Diasomnia members can keep an eye on you for him!

The Diasomnia group basically adopts you. Imagine what you will with that information!

#twisted wonderland #twst #twisted wonderland x reader #twst headcanons #jade leech #jade leech x reader #epel felmier #epel felmier x reader #ruggie bucchi #ruggie bucchi x reader #azul ashengrotto #azul ashengrotto x reader #lilia vanrouge #lilia vanrouge x reader

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travellingarmy · 3 years

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║Childe║Changed

Requested from Wattpad.

Female reader as requested.

Word count: 4.1k

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Liyue is a prosperous city that attracts many and all sorts of people from business-related work to thieves who wish to earn extra cash. Everyone goes to Liyue with something on their mind that they hope to find in the city. There's even you- a normal person and a vision user- who came to Liyue all the way from Qingce village to look for a job. Everyone in Liyue all came with different reasons, but was all tied to Liyue.

Originally, your goal was to make enough money for a lifetime and then return to the mountains and help the elderly care for the fields and other needed work. That's just how your character was, but then an unforeseen event occurred and now you were in Liyue for a person.

"(Y/N), can you go pick up a batch of qingxin flower near Qingyun Peak? I'd ask Qiqi, but I sent her already to look for another herb." Baizhu enters the back room where you were sorting out the herbs in alphabetical order. "Sure, Dr. Baizhu. I'll do it right after I'm done these," you said.

"Thank you, (Y/N). Sorry for troubling you. I would go if I was fit for such exhausting travels, but you know how weak my body is," he said and you nod in understanding. He was the great doctor, but can't even heal his own illness. You didn't care about that as it wasn't your business and depart for the pharmacy when you were done at the back.

Looking at the sky above you and the position of the sun, you could tell that you will return late at night even when you run. You left from the sight of the city with only a satchel for the flowers. It was dangerous, yes, but you can fully protect yourself just as Qiqi can with her petite stature.

You were exhausted even before seeing a qingxin flower, but you did not stop. If you did, you'd have to camp the night out in the wilderness and that was something you were never fond of. Right now, you could tell that it was somewhere 3-4 in the afternoon- soon to be evening- and you departed from Liyue around 10 in the morning. "Please, Geo Lord, let me find these flowers soon," you say a quick prayer before stepping foot in the mountain area.

As if Rex Lapis had heard your little prayer, you found enough to satisfy Baizhu for two weeks at least, but the time it took was too long and by the time you decided it was enough, it was seven at night. You cried when you thought about how long it took just to reach the outer edge of Jeuyun Karst. "No! I am not camping out here!" you say out loud and determinedly made your way down the mountains- a bit slower when descending- and use what little energy you had with your determination to push dismiss your aching feet.

However, it seems that Rex Lapis didn't allow your travel back to be safe as you were soon facing a Lawachurl. "For the love of..!" Your sword appeared on your right hand and made sure that the satchel was sealed shut before engaging to fight the beast.

The beast, although bigger and most likely stronger than you, had a slower reaction time and decided to use that as an advantage so you dodge its fists and jump when he smashes the ground, but then, a sudden jolt of pain shot through your whole body when a stone came at you. You dodged it by a hair's length but collapsed soon afterwards. "My damn feet..!" Your body- especially your legs- was exhausted from the nonstop walk which made your reflexes a bit slower.

The lawachurl made it's slow approach towards you with its towering stature. You thought of a quick escape, but you just needed your body to co-operate with you. "Come on. Move!" You were pushing your exhausted legs past its limits, but knew it was your end when it raised its two arms that was to crush your smaller frame.

Your body suddenly jolts with energy and you found yourself suspended in air. You took this chance and use your vision to enhance your sword and bash the lawachurl's head open. It cried out as you jump away from it and watch as it disintegrated like any other wretched beast. You were left panting and scratched up, but you were happy that none of the flowers had fallen out.

"Ho~ What's a beauty doing out here so late at night?" A voice suddenly made its way to your ears and turned to your right, your sword blocking your body. The owner of the voice suddenly appeared before you and clashed his make-shift weapon with yours in an instant. "Oh? You've got quick reflexes even when you're exhausted. I should praise you for that."

"What are you doing?" you say through gritted teeth and push your sword. Then to your relief, the person jumps back a couple metres away, their weapon disappearing, and you sighed as you collapsed on the ground, your sword disappearing. "Haha, sorry to scare you. I was passing by and saw that a beauty was in a pickle," they said. "I was deciding whether or not if I should help you out, but you already took care of it." They shrug and puts their hands on their waist and grins at you.

You look at the person before you with a cautious gaze. They were male with ginger hair, blue eyes, and foreign clothing, and by the looks of it, he was somewhere near your age. "So, you're saying that you saw me, but didn't bother on helping me right away?"

The male looks at you and shrugs again. "I was going to help you since you're cute, but like I said- you already took care of it."

"And if I wasn't cute, you'd just leave me here to die!?" You were exhausted, but still manage to pull the look of disbelief. You waited for a reply, but instead, got a change of topic. "Anyway, what are you doing here so far from safety?" he asks and made his way towards you, his weapon out of sight as to not make you alert.

"None of your business," was all you could say in your exhausted state. "Ouch, no need to be so cold," the male says, though not even trying to mask hurt. You were tired of talking to the irritatingly brunette and wanted to return to the pharmacy. Slowly, you pushed yourself off the ground and took a step slowly. But, your body failed in fulfilling that and you fell forward and into the arms of the man, his hands holding your arms out of reflex. "Oh, don't tell me you've fallen for me now--" He stopped his teasing when he noticed that you were out cold. "Ah, what am I going to do?"

When you awoke, you found yourself facing a ceiling and feel the the comfort of a soft pillow and mattress and a warm blanket covering your body. You slowly sat up, hissing at the soreness and pain that washed over your body with a now conscious mind. The first thing you notice when looking at your hands and arms was that they were bandaged up and even feel a bandage on your left cheek.

"Good morning, sleeping beauty. It's about time you woke up," an irritating voice comes and greet you and chuckles. You recalled the fight with the lawachurl and the brunette who suddenly jumped out of nowhere and pick a fight with you. You turn your head to the right and see the same brunette at a small table, sipping his drink. The sun shone from behind him which made him look as if he was glowing. Now that it was daytime, you can properly see his face and was almost taken aback by how charming he looked.

He could see how your irises expanded at the sight of him which made him smirk. "Oh? You suddenly interested in me now?" he teasingly say and you suddenly broke out from the trance you were in just now. "Don't joke around with me," you said, remembering to what you has awoke to. "Anyway, where did you bring me?"

"Straight to the question with such a demanding tone. That's quite new to me," the brunette says. "Anyway, you can call me Childe, but I rather you call me babe." He chuckles which really upset you and you didn't mask to hide your frown. "I don't care who you are. I want to know where I am."

He looks at you and sighs. "Man, you're going to be a difficult one, aren't you? We are at Wangshu Inn," he finally answers. "I don't know where you live so I brought you here and bandaged you up. On that note, you should thank me."

You looked at your hands and then at the brunette who rested his cheek on the back of his hands and a leg crossing over the other, grinning cheekily at you. "Thank you." You got up, your body still aching from the fight. You see that you were still fully clothed and you mentally sighed out of relief before snatching your satchel on the nightstand beside the bed and leaving the room and soon the inn.

"(Y/N), I was worried when you didn't return last night and was about to send Qiqi to help you," Baizhu greets you at the pharmacy. "Qiqi was worried," Qiqi greets as well, wrapping her arms around your legs as a mean for a hug.

"Sorry, Doctor Baizhu. I had ran into some trouble and was tired to walk back last night," you said. "Oh, and I gathered a lot of qingxin flower for you." You took off the satchel off your shoulders and handed it to the doctor. "Hope these are enough."

"I'm sure it is. Thank you, (Y/N)," he said and puts the satchel full of qingxin flowers on the counter. "Alright, why don't you go ahead and rest for two days to heal your wounds? He looks over at your bandaged arms and face. You were grateful and thanked him before leaving the pharmacy.

The second day, your body wasn't hurting as much, but your wounds were still wrapped up in bandages which you changed when you got home. You found yourself lacking of food so you were out early in the morning on grocery shopping. "Ham.. Eggs.. Milk.." you read your list loud enough just for you to hear. But, since your eyes were glued onto the thin sheet of paper, you didn't notice a person suddenly appear before you and block your way before bumping into their chest.

"Ah, my apologies. I wasn't looking ahead," you say and rub your nose. "Hoh~ Well, what do you know? I thought you looked familiar and I was correct. Seems like we meet again." The all too familiar voice spoke above you, making you freeze up on the spot.

Slowly, you raise your head and see none other than the male from two days ago. "Is it just me or are we possibly fated to be together? Do you remember my name?" he asks, a grin forms on his charming face. "I'm afraid I don't," you said half-heartedly and excused yourself before brushing shoulders with him as you walk away. But, he grabs your elbow and stops you from walking any further. You look over your shoulders and give him the 'what gives' kind of look. "Well, since you forgot, I'll remind you again; my name is Childe," he says and leans close to your face. His eyes were a deep blue even under the light and felt as if you were drowning under water, where the water was an alluring colour of a pretty, deep blue. You were mesmerized, but notice that there was more to what the little pond you had found in his ocean eyes which made you much alert. Childe notice the fiery flames in your eyes suddenly on guard and he chuckles before straightening up.

"So, what's your name?" he asks. "I'm sorry, but I don't believe we're on the comfortable terms to know each other's names, sir," you stated. Your words are constructed to be polite, but your tone says otherwise. "Aw, you're going to play it the hard way with your saviour?" He forces a pout that was definitely not going to make you feel guilty so you stood there just staring at the brunette. He laughs and puts a hand on his hip. "Very well, I will do whatever I can to make you tell me your name."

You were about to turn your head and walk away, when a voice rang out across the streets. "Master Childe~" A high-pitched, flirtatious voice calls his name, drawing you both behind him. By the way they dressed, you could immediately tell that the female before you two was one of the many scums that could be found in large cities and that being said, you know exactly what kind of person the man whom called himself Childe is like.

"Master Childe, I've found you~ Did you know how sad I was when you didn't show up for two days?" The female clung onto the male's arm, completely dismissing your presence. Now that he was distracted, you took this chance to slip away from him and do your grocery shopping.

However, just because you slipped away today, didn't mean you slipped away forever or that you can do it the next time, and with that in mind, Childe was seen hanging around you- well, more like pestering you. But, with time, you soon came to accept the fact that the man wouldn't stop any time soon and told him your name and exchange words with him.

Of course, you had your doubts and had your guard up around him, seeing as he had a scum following him around almost daily, but you soon realize that you could see past the one part of him that didn't make up even one percent of him.

In months, you felt something in your chest that you know was wrong, but you couldn't help it as it dealt with him.

"Hey, (Y/N), wanna go on a little date for dinner?" Childe asks, approaching you out on the streets. When he said 'date' you know that it wasn't an actual date; it was a thing he said meaning to buy you lunch or dinner as a friend.

"You'll have to wait for an hour for me to get off work," you said, making your way up the steps of the pharmacy. "That's not long at all, apropos to getting your name, that is. I can wait," he said and gives you one of his dorky grin. You shooed him away and he did just that, off to reserve a seat for the two of you.

The hour felt long and made you impatient that it even shows. Baizhu looks over at you and smirks, knowing the reason had to be related to the young man he had been seeing occupying most of your time and mind. "(Y/N), since your shift is close to an end, why don't I let you go now? It makes no difference and Qiqi is here to help out if needed," Baizhu said, seeing as you face light up. "Really? Thank you so much Doctor!" you cheer, not even hiding the fact that you were indeed impatient to see Childe. You made haste around the counter and leave the pharmacy.

"Where is (Y/N)?" Qiqi asks, coming out from the back of the building, holding some sort of plant. "She just left, Qiqi," Baizhu answers and see that Qiqi became sad and pouted. "Qiqi was going to ask her if she'd search for the cocogoat with Qiqi.." Baizhu chuckles and put a hand on top of the little girl's head. "Sorry, Qiqi, but she's on a date."

"A date? What do you mean?" With that, Baizhu was now occupied trying to explain to the best he could as to what a date meant in the said case.

Just a few metres in front of you, you see Childe's back towards you as he chatted with a Liyue local. You were about to call out his name when a girl suddenly steps into view, blocking you from getting close to Childe. "So, you're the one hanging around Master Childe, huh?" was the first thing she said and looks at you up and down in disgust. "I don't get it. I mean, you don't even got the parts to be Master Childe's best."

Oh dear.. You know the girl all too well as she was the one you saw running to Childe and throwing herself at him. Childe has many more of the scums around him, but this one was around him the most. You bet that she brawled with the other scums because she wants Childe all to herself- well, his money.

"Hey, look, I'm going to be really nice here and tell you politely to leave Master Childe alone. He doesn't have time to loiter around someone who's body is of no use," she says and gives you a wicked grin, putting a hand on her hip to show dominance. You were unfazed and gave her a blank expression. "I'm sorry, but who are you to decide who I can and can not hang out with?" you ask.

"Hah, don't get on my bad list, girlie. Just so you know Master Childe slept with me the most," she states proudly. The words did hurt you, but it didn't make you cave into a cowardice. You kind of guessed he has slept with many women, considering how he had scums all over him. "Okay, I get that you're a scum, but you haven't answered my question."

You could see that the girl was already breaking and you couldn't help but snicker at how easy she was. "Listen here, I bet you haven't even gotten a taste of what Master Childe can do, considering how small your breast is," she laughs, looking at your average ones. "And I bet once he's gotten a taste of you, he'd be done and leave you."

You honestly didn't know where this conversation was going, but you stayed calm and hear her. "Oh? Then, tell me how I should please him to make him stay with me for- let's say.. Forever?" You cross your arms, still not letting her get to you.

"Psh, you think he'd stay with you even if I tell you?" She was hysterical, her face twisting to make her look like a witch. "Look, I'm sorry, but I really don't have time to talk to you. Have a good day," you said. You were about to brush shoulders with her when she grabbed hold of your arm and weakily throws you back. "Hey, you're not going anywhere until I know you're not going to hang around him."

"Sorry, but I can't comply to your wishes as it was your 'Master Childe' that came onto me," you state, grinning with your own wicked grin.

The girl snaps and lunges herself at you, but before she could even lay her long nails at you, you pulled out your sword and point it at her throat, just mere millimetres to lunging it in. Your face was still cool as ice, but the girl's mocking face turned to horror. "Listen, scum, I don't have time for idle chit chat as I have a date with your Master Childe," you said and lean to her ears so that only she could hear what you had to say next. "I don't care who you are, what you are to him, and I know that you can't even touch me so you best behave before my patience runs out and I plunge this sword at your pretty face. I'm being nice here and have pretty high patience so you best run along now."

The girl nodded frantically and runs past you. You turn around and watch as the girl disappears from sight. "Maybe you should call me Master," a voice whispers, feeling their breath tickling your ears. You turn around and was faced with the grinning ginger. "That is not going to happen."

"Maybe some day." He shrugs, which you immediately said no to. "Haha, but you said this was a date so that's a step close, no?" Your face flushed, forgetting that he was close by and had heard what you said to the girl. "Gah, I was just trying to let that girl feel mad," you said.

"Oh? You sure you don't want to call this a date?" he asks, giving you that glimmering eye look. "You can call it whatever as long as I get a free meal," you say and brush past him.

"Well, I know another way for you to get a free meal, but I wouldn't call it a date," he snickers and your lightly dusted face heated up quickly, knowing what he meant. "Shut up!"

"What? I was saying that we can always hunt," he lies, acting innocent to frame your impurity. "If you're not going to take me on that 'date', then I'm going back to the pharmacy," you said. He chuckles and fall in step with you, leading you the an expensive restaurant.

After the meal, you two were walking along the docks in silence, the ocean in the background was shimmering and wondered if it was a million noctilicious jade instead of pure water.

"So, what did you talk about with that girl from earlier?" Childe suddenly asks in a light tone. Your mind suddenly thought back to the event that had occurred with the girl and what she said about Childe sleeping with her. You wanted to ask, but you felt as if it wasn't right since it was his life and you didn't even know how to approach such question. "I'm sure you already know," you said.

"No, I don't so do enlighten me, since it was about me," he says. Then, you thought that it was the perfect time to add what you wanted to ask and took the chance. "Eh, nothing much. She kept on bragging how you slept with her multiple times though," you managed to slip in and shrug, playing it cool.

"Woah, woah, woah! She said that!?" Childe stops on his tracks and you turn to look at him. "That girl.. I swear that I haven't slept with her, or anyone for that matter!" Childe says, seeing his eyes look almost quite desperate to reassure you.

Your heart felt lighter, but decided to go on with the teasing. "Oh, really?" He nods almost instantly and you had to conceal your laughter. "Well, she said how you good you tasted and how well you did in bed to the point that I believed in it," you said, covering your mouth with a hand to hide your devilish smirk.

"You don't believe me?" he asks. "Nope," you said, not giving in to his saddened eyes. Then, almost in an instant, Childe walks closer to you and grabs your shoulders harshly. "Hey, what are you--" Your lips were sealed with his own. His lips was soft which caused a spark to jolt within you and making your legs almost became like jelly, giving in to the kiss.

Your hands were on his chest as he wraps an arm around your waist and the other on the back of your head. His tongue easily slipped past your lips and was now in a battle with yours, but that battle had ended sooner than you wished for when he pulls back and found the both of you panting. "I swear to you, (Y/N), that I didn't sleep with her," he says in a low voice.

To his surprise, you laughed. "I was just teasing around with you. Of course, I believe you," you said and smiled. The brunette stare at you in disbelief and when your laughter died down, you were kind of worried if you made a mistake in doing that. Then, he brings his lips back to yours with much more tenderness and you wrapped your arms around his neck, bringing him closer to you.

He pulls away again to your disappointment. "You are the only one I'd ever sleep with," he says, his wrap around your waist becoming tighter. "Then you better ditch those other girls or you're sleeping with no one," you joked before bringing him for another kiss, this time being longer.

---

#childe x reader #genshin impact #female reader #genshin #genshin impact oneshots #genshin childe #x reader #childe oneshot

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angelanika · 3 years

Text

How Bizarre Pt.3

<<<Part 2

Chapter Warnings: Toxic Relationships, Sugar daddy/baby relationship, cheating, cursing, implied sexual activity, depictions of racial discrimination

Your new job is how you would describe as very...eventful.

While most of the girls catered to Mr.Hara in more thrilling ways, you took it upon yourself to look after Prince and actually do some tidying up around the place, which Mr.Hara was extremely grateful for.

And being the generous magician that he is, he then materialized said gratitude into dollar bills.

One Saturday evening after you had tucked Prince in and all of the girls had left, you placed a steaming plate in front of an exhausted Mr.Hara who instantly pulled you into his lap.

The house was eerily quiet for a place that’s usually buzzing with excitement but you kinda enjoyed the peace.

You made yourself comfortable as he holds you tight against his broad chest and rests his head on your shoulder, letting out a deep sigh.

His sleek, black hair was untidy and a few top buttons of his shirt had been undone but overall, the man just looked SEXY.

“Rough day?” you ask softly.

“Yeah,” he groans. “Thank you for the meal princess.”

“My pleasure.”

You hop off his lap to allow him to eat and he ushers you to sit down next to him.

As he finished, you sprung up to collect the plate but he stopped you and told you to just sit back down for a minute.

You were confused.

“So,” he finally began,”My wife is coming back tomorrow.”

Well isn’t this fucker just full of surprises...

“WIFE?!” you exclaimed, “You told me you were divorced!”

“Divorced……..in my mind.”

This bitch.

You felt totally betrayed, stupid and almost disgusted with yourself. You wanted to slap him across his cheek, spit in his face and walk out right then and there but... you didn’t.

You knew that finding a new job that paid just as well quickly would be extremely difficult, especially when the employers here were always reluctant to hire...people like you…

You basically had to fight for your last job and even after all that struggling, they still didn’t pay you well.

Mr.Hara watched the anger wash away from your face, being replaced with that of just annoyance and uncertainty of what to do next.

Taking notice of your semi-cooldown, he figured it was ok to continue, “She was dealing with some international relations for the Hero’s Commission abroad and was gone for quite a bit, but as i said, she’ll be back tomorrow so I have to make some changes.”

You rolled your eyes and sighed, plopping your exhausted body down in the luxury dining chair, holding your aching head in your hands.

“Ok, so what does that mean for me?” You asked without even looking up.

Mr.Hara adjusted in his chair a bit and cleared his throat, “ahem well obviously I can’t have all the girls here anymore, so I let them go.”

Your face flew up, “Even Lada?”

“Yes, sorry, I know you two had gotten close.”

You only sighed and dropped your head again as he continued.

“But I would like for you to stay if you don’t mind.”

Seeing that you were the only one who really worked around the house and took care of Prince, it made sense.

With his wife around, his little “maids” are gonna have to actually do some housework and that’s where you come in.

“My wife will probably try to cut your pay but don’t worry, I’ll still top up your account and such. So what do you say princess?”

You remained quiet.

“I understand if you want to go,” Mr.Hara said quickly during your silence, sitting up and reaching for your hand, “but it would be a real help if you sta-”

“fine.” you whispered.

Relief washed over the unnecessarily attractive man and he was finally able to relax back down in his seat.

But just as he slouched back down, you swiftly jumped up.

“But if she’s a bitch then I want extra,” you argue.

Mr.Hara immediately laughed at this and dragged you into his lap once more,

“Well I guess I’ll be paying you extra princess.”

* * *

The next day, just as he had promised, Mrs.Hara arrived.

She had long manicured nails and shiny jewelry to match. Her silky dark hair rested by her slim waist adorned with an expensive diamond clip. She looked a tad younger than Mr.Hara himself but her stare was just as intimidating.

The minute she stepped through the door, the whole atmosphere changed drastically and it was plain as day that their relationship hadn’t a single drop of romance.

You wondered if it arranged for connections or convenience or something like that but then again, that ain’t none of your business.

"Welcome home," Mr Hara stated plainly.

“Mm thanks" she boredly replied.

She huffed while taking off her brown fur coat, to which he makes no effort to assist and you laughed to yourself at the thought of how eager he is to remove other women’s clothing.

"Where's Rosalina? I need a massage."

"Actually…” Mr.Hara began, “Ms.Rosalina was getting a little old and had served us well for years so I let her go."

Mrs.Hara glared at him.

He then grabbed your shoulders and presented you in front of her.

"This is Y/N L/N, our new maid"

The terrifying woman finally acknowledged your presence.

She eyed you up and down and up and down.

The sass in you was aching to do the same to her and turn up your nose, but u suppressed to urge.

"Hm," she finally says, "at least she looks the part."

TF SHE MEAN BY THAT?!?!

"Ok Y/N, I'm not comfortable with you touching me just yet, so fix up a plate for me quickly, I'm starving. I don't care what it is."

"Ok," you said ready to walk off.

"Oh and one more thing....its Yes Mrs.Hara"

As you strolled passed Mr.Hara to slip into the kitchen, you quickly tapped his shoulder and whispered, "Remember. Extra."

* * *

It had been a little over 2 months since Mrs.Hara's arrival and you were balancing working at the house and the daycare pretty well.

When you finally arrived at the mansion one Friday to complete your evening work, you immediately noticed a missing luxury car from the massive driveway.

"Mrs.Hara," you spoke, "should i prepare the dinner table for you and your husband now or will he be out a bit later?"

She straightened up from her lounging position on the couch and looked up from her phone to face you.

"Oh yeah, about that. I kicked him out."

Huh?

Your soul left your body.

Fly high y/n 🕊

"W-what do you mean you kicked him out?" You damn near shouted. Your voice laced with desperation and your eyes wide and shaky.

Mr.Hara was the only reason you kept this job, the only thing getting you through this job!

She turned to you with a raised brow, confused as to why this would bother you so much.

"I caught the old dirtbag sleeping around so I kicked him out," she explained calmly.

"Frankly I knew he always had other girls in our bed and I was with other men," she laughed, "but I got tired of it, you know, so I kicked him out."

You felt sick.

"P-please excuse me," you mutter.

Mrs.Hara only gave you a small nod before plugging back in her earbuds and turning to her phone.

You dashed towards your small chambers and immediately took out yours.

"Please pick up! Please pick up! Please pick up!" You chanted into the device as it rang.

The number you have dialed is unavailable. Please tr-

Fuck...

“Come on you dirty bastard! Pick up! Pick up!”

The number you have dialed is unavailabl-

FUCK!!

You probably tried to call Mr.Hara’s phone at least 74 times that evening and each time there was no answer.

You didn't have anyone to ask for a possible new number.

The extra cash suddenly stopped being deposited into your account

And honestly, now you were just tired.

Rumour has it that he left everything behind to go live his best life in the tropical paradise of Jamaica soaking up the sun, sand and sea and fully enjoying the Caribbean girls and culture.

You laughed to yourself as you thought about all these bizarre events that took place throughout the year and landed you where you are now.

All you could do was laugh at this point.

You looked back at the list Mrs.Hara had left on the table for you this morning, mentally ticking off "Make Lemonade" as you placed the 2 jugs in the large refrigerator.

"Ok y/n," you said to yourself, "time for the cupcakes! Ouuu Prince is gonna love these!"

As you zoomed through the kitchen, as busy as a bee, Bakugou was on the other side of town casually strolling through the hotel you had left just hours before.

“Did you enjoy your stay, Ground Zero?” asked the polite lobby boy as he opened the large glass door for the hero.

“Yeah Yeah Whatever,” Bakugou grumbled while pulling up his dark sunglasses.

But he was in a better mood than most days and was feeling generous.

Before he slipped through the door, he stopped and pulled out his wallet, “And uh, here’s a tip- WHAT THE FUCK?!”

Lobby boy: 👁👄👁

“WHERE TF IS MY MONEY?!”

“Umm sir...we’re gonna need you to lower your voi-”

“STFU and take this,” Bakugou yelled while shoving a $20 bill into the boy's hand.

The boy went on to thank the Pro Hero but Bakugou was already storming out the door and throwing himself into his car.

“I’m sure I had a few other hundred bucks in here, where the fuc-……...THAT BITCH!”

It all finally came back to him.

“THAT SNEAKY FUCKING BITCH! Ohhhh when I get my hands on the slu-”

*Brrrrr Brrrrr*

Bakugou continued to curse under his breath as he aggressively shifted around in the car to grab his phone from his back pocket, “Tch. What is it shittyhair?!”

“Hey Man!” Kirishima chirped, “Just reminding you about the kid’s birthday party today.”

“HAH?! The fuck you talking about? It’s my day off!”

“Uh well no, not really. You agreed to show up for the kid’s party today at 4, remember?”

Bakugou finally took a glance at the notifications on his phone, revealing the 20+ reminders from his assistant and notes in his calendar.

Oh yea this shit to make him lOoK bEttEr iN tHe pUbLic eYE.

“AGHHH!! Fine...I’m on my way. I just need to go home and grab my costume.”

“You’re not at home?”.

“No shittyhair, I’m at a hotel.”

“What are you doing at a hote- OHHH!” Bakugou could practically hear Kiri’s smirk through the phone, “so you finallyyy got laid, huh?”

“Shut the hell up! It hasn’t been that long shittyface!”

“Its shittyhai-”

“WHATEVERTHEFUCK”

“Haha alright man,” Kiri laughed, “Just hurry up ok? I’m pulling up now and these people are LOADED!”

Bakugou started up his car and put Kirishima on speaker as he began to drive.

“Yeah ok whatever, just send the address.”

“Alright man, will do…...wait, HOLY SHIT Bro!”

“What is it?!” Bakugou barked.

“Aye man, make sure you dress well! The maid setting up here is SMOKING HO-”

*Beep* Call Ended

“Tch. Fucking dumbass…”

A/N: wheww what a piece of drama! Sorry if this seemed rushed, I really wanted to get the backstory out there, without taking away from the main plot 😅 Thanks for all the support, sorry for the wait but sit back, things are gonna get heated🤪

Taglist:

@jazzylove @blkirishima @lovinthesiz3 @lasnaro @starrylustrousastraea @thanx-idonttry

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blueaura · 3 years

Text

Lost and Found Ch. 6

A/N: I finally finished it! I apologise for the delay but GISH (that’s all I’m gonna say). Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter. It’s after midnight here, and I have class in the morning so I’m off to sleep. Thanks to everyone who’s read it this far. As always, any tips and suggestions are welcome. Feedback would be amazing. Thank you and happy reading!

Summary: Sam and Dean meet a young hunter who is a little rough around the edges and they reluctantly take her under their wing. But she might be a little more connected to them that any of them realise.

Word Count: 2.1k

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Y/N waited patiently. For 3 whole minutes.

“You want me to trust you, right?” It was a rhetorical question but the brothers still nodded, looking suitably chastised.

Dean sighed, frustrated at his lack of control in the situation. He looked at Sam who just looked worriedly at Y/N, which reminded Dean that she had been crying and he should probably check if she was alright.

“Let’s go inside first, you’re not even wearing shoes,” Dean said lightly, trying to subtly get Y/N out of the cold. She eyed him suspiciously but agreed to go inside. Her feet were cold but Dean didn’t have to know that. The door closed behind them as they made their way inside.

“You doing okay?” Dean not-so-subtly tried to change the subject, but Y/N was just not having it. She merely looked at the hunter and raised her eyebrows, waiting for a response to her previous inquiry.

He looked frustratedly at his brother and sharply exhaled, feeling the exhaustion catch up to him.

“Our friend thinks you might be in danger,” Dean started slowly. “He isn’t convinced that you being here on the same hunt as us is a coincidence. Which, you know, I can’t really blame him. Coincidences aren’t too common in our line of work. Even more so if we’re to believe the whole paternity… aspect of the situation – yes, I know nothing is confirmed yet,” he interrupted before she could protest. She glared at the wall angrily.

“Look, we have to work under the assumption that it is true for the moment, at least until we know more. It’s better to play it safe instead of having a false sense of security. Now, you being related to us makes you a target, so we need to keep you safe. So, you need to decide now – you wanna come with us or are we putting extra security measures at Jody’s?”

“Who’s this friend of yours? And how do you even plan on ‘knowing more’? Last I checked, you were still legally dead!” she burst out. “And just to remind you, I’m not some helpless child. I’ve survived on my own for years, I don’t need your protection.” She knew she was being spiteful, but she pushed down the pang of guilt that was creeping in.

Sam waited for Dean to explode. He knew his brother very well and Dean didn’t do the ‘talking reasonably’ thing for too long. He was actually proud of Dean for keeping his composure for so long. He knew that if it was him who was in danger, Dean would have knocked him out and dragged him to the bunker if necessary. He could just imagine how well that approach would work with Y/N. So, Sam waited to see how his brother would react, prepared to jump in and salvage the situation if needed. But again, Dean surprised him.

He walked up to where she was sitting on Sam’s bed and knelt in front of her, forcing her to look at him instead of the wall. “I know you’re good at taking care of yourself, alright? You wanna cut out the bullshit and get real with me for a second? You’re strong and resourceful, yes – but kid, this is a different ball game we play here. Hunters who have had years and years of experience don’t survive long in our world. I just want to keep you safe, that’s all. Just… work with me here Y/N.”

“We promise we will figure everything out. Just come with us, please,” Sam chimed in, puppy dog eyes in full effect.

Y/N’s nails dug into her palms as she tried to process everything. She felt Dean’s hands take her own, rubbing over the crescent shaped indents she created.

“As for your other questions – Our friend is Cas, or Castiel. He’s an angel, and I believe he can help with the whole getting answers thing. He can explain how later, if you agree to come back home with us. What do you say, kiddo? We taking a road trip home to Kansas or am I ringing up Jody about setting up a guest room? It’s your choice, but I for one need to know if I should be summoning Sandra’s ghost and yelling at her for not telling me about my daughter.”

Dean’s voice was gruff with emotion and Sam almost felt like he was intruding a private moment, but then Y/N looked at him – with Dean’s eyes, he realized – and he felt the familiar protective instinct flare up, only a thousand times worse. He’d always been the little brother, the one who needed to be protected, and while he felt protective over his big brother, he also knew Dean could take care of himself. So, this new dynamic was something of an adjustment, and he wondered if Dean had felt like this his entire life. He couldn’t imagine how he hid it so well.

“Fine,” the soft voice broke the tense silence in the room. Y/N refused to make eye contact, even with Dean kneeling in front of her. His knees had started to hurt but he didn’t care. He was close to a breakthrough and he could feel it. The words registered with the brothers and Dean’s hands tightened over Y/N’s as they waited for her to continue.

“I’ll go with you… but only for now. I don’t promise anything. I can’t. And, if it isn’t working, I’m out. Those are my conditions,” she somehow got the words out, hands shaking even in Dean’s grip.

Dean wasn’t happy with it, but as he looked at Sam, he knew this was the best he was gonna get for now. He opened his mouth to agree with her, even if it was just to get her to the damn bunker and to safety, when she continued.

“And can we press pause on the family talk? I need to talk to your friend first before I make a decision on that subject,” her voice was barely there, but she ignored Dean’s clenched jaw in favour of getting the words out. She needed his reassurance that he wouldn’t pressure her to take whatever angelic DNA test he had in mind. Maybe she would feel better after talking to the angel, which – she couldn’t believe she was gonna meet an actual angel – but until then, she didn’t want to hear about it. She needed to process the information first.

“Please,” she said before Dean could interrupt. Even Sam looked bummed at her request but her at least understood where she was coming from. He had, after all, seen her epic break down earlier. She forced herself to ignore the hurt look in Dean’s eyes and tried to remind herself that – no, she didn’t care about these guys more than any other tentative friends, but it was hard. The hurt vanished and hid behind the classic Dean mask, as he tried to smile back at her, and she felt even worse if that was possible.

“Well, we have a long drive ahead of us so let me know if you change your mind,” he cleared his throat as he stood up and walked to the fridge in search of another beer.

“We’ll head out in the morning after breakfast. That reminds me, you hungry Y/N? None of us technically had dinner. I can run out and grab us something,” Sam tried to diffuse the tension in the room.

Y/N was hungry. They had split up during the day and she had been running low on cash the past couple of days, making her skip lunch that afternoon. So, the last thing she had eaten was the breakfast the Winchesters had provided for her. She usually had a better control of her hunger – life on the streets wasn’t the best for a young girl – but the boys had been feeding her regularly during their time together, barring that afternoon, so her body had grown accustomed to the food. Which was why, as soon as she was reminded of it, her stomach grumbled loudly, making Sam smile as her face grew red with embarrassment. She didn’t want to take advantage of their generosity, so she just told Sam to get whatever he wanted to eat. She would be grateful for any food they provided for her.

“Get extra food today, Sammy. I worked up an appetite earlier.” Dean had found it odd that Y/N never asked for anything but now it made sense. He knew that the kid wouldn’t let them know if she wanted more food, he recognized that particular trait from his own childhood – which made him want to throttle Sandra. The Sandy he knew was cold and calculating, but she also had a good heart. He couldn’t figure out why she would raise a kid in the hunting life, and if she was alive, he would have been tempted to knock some sense into her. It didn’t seem like she was the most affectionate mother either, if Y/N’s reactions were anything to go by. He didn’t miss the flinch when he grabbed her hands earlier, and the thought of her hurt made him see red.

Sam merely nodded at his brother’s request, seeing through the thin excuse. He looked at Y/N and decided to forgo his normal healthy food in favour of some greasy goodness instead. The kid deserved a treat. Grabbing the keys for the Impala, he walked out and the door shut behind him, leaving Y/N and Dean awkwardly standing around in the room.

“How did you know her?” Y/N’s voice seemed to echo in the room. Dean instantly knew who she was talking about.

“I met her when I was seventeen. She saved my ass actually. I was on a hunt with my Dad and it was just us that day. It was ghouls, I think. Dad was knocked out and I was outnumbered but then she came in and kicked their asses. She was a brilliant hunter you know,” Dean smiled softly at the memory.

“Anyway, we got to talking and realized that we had a lot in common. So, we kept in touch. We would get together when we were in the same town but both of us knew we didn’t want anything serious. Honestly, I never pictured her having kids. She didn’t seem to want any at that time but I guess people change.”

“No, they don’t,” she replied as a tear slid down her cheek. She had cried more that day than she had in the past four years and it frustrated her to no end. Normally, she knew how to numb herself, but something about the Winchesters made her want to tell them everything and she hated it, hated feeling so weak. If this was what living with them was going to be like, she wanted out already.

Dean’s heart dropped at Y/N’s words. He hated that she grew up feeling so alone and he promised himself that he would give that kid a home, regardless of whether she was his.

They sat in silence after that, but surprisingly it wasn’t uncomfortable. Y/N was almost dozing off again when Sam returned with the food. The heavenly smell of burgers jerked her wide awake and Dean tried to hide his grin at her reaction.

She waited until Sam and Dean had taken their fill before moving to take a small portion of fries with her burger, making the boys look at each other worriedly. Clearly, things were worse than they had imagined. They had a long road ahead of them.

After dinner, it was decided that they would move out first thing in the morning and Dean proposed getting some shut eye. Neither of them wanted to let Y/N out of their sight but one raised eyebrow from her had them surrendering and she went back to her own room to sleep. If the brothers got up periodically to check on her throughout the night, she didn’t have to know that.

The next morning, she nervously picked at her duffle bag as the brothers handled the check out. This was it, her last chance at backing out. She could make a run for it and they wouldn’t know until it was too late, but her feet remained planted to the ground. Sam walked out first, Dean following closely. No backing out now. Dean opened the trunk and threw their stuff in, and they all shuffled into the car – Dean in the driver’s seat, Sam beside him and Y/N sat stiffly in the back seat.

Sam turned around to look at her, silently asking if she was alright. She nodded slightly but continued to fidget in her seat. Dean caught her eye in the rear-view mirror and held her gaze for a minute before he started the car. Over the loud rumble of the engine he said, “Let’s go home, kiddo.”

Chapter 7

TAGS: @vicmc624 @carisi-sonny @zizzlekwum @geekqueen5 @mondefantastique @lemondropirwin @hamildork @mrswhozeewhatsis

If anyone else would like to be tagged, please send me an ask (: Thanks for reading!

#supernatural #supernatural fanfiction #spn fanfic #dean winchester #Sam Winchester #dean winchester x reader #sam winchester x reader #dean x reader #sam x reader #castiel #castiel x reader #platonic relationships #Cee tries to write

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itbe-jess · 3 years

Text

Maslophobia: Chapter 8

Captured recorded audio of Karl Rodriguez having phone conversations with the formal Paradise Critter performers before their disappearances, including Karl’s himself.

Stevie: Yes?

Karl: STEVEN! How you do, how you do?

Stevie: Okay, who the hell is this?

Karl: What, you don't remember your old work buddy, Karl Rodriguez? Of Karl's Paradise?

Stevie: Oh, you. Just to state one fact: We aren't buddies. We just did work. The only time you've ever treated me like a friend was when I wore the freakin' dog costume. Second of all, what do you want?

Karl: Well, the REAL question is, what do YOU want?

Stevie: What do I want, what?

Karl: With your life, I mean. Have you ever considered getting into acting again? I just had the thought you were a man who looked into a brighter future.

Stevie: Well, I've been putting a lot of thought into it, continuing showbiz. What I want is more than just to hide my face behind some puppet costume. I wanna act. I also wanna write, and create.

Karl: That's interesting!

Stevie: But what I really wanna do is direct.

Karl: Oh! A little showbiz humor there!

Stevie: [*Chuckles*] Yeah. Say, Karl, I have another question.

Karl: Shoot.

Stevie: Why the fuck are you poking into my business like this?

Karl: Well, bet you haven't noticed, but I'm still doing work at Tam Studios!

Stevie: Great. How about telling me something I should care about?

Karl: No no no no, you don't understand, Stevie. I wanna help you pave your career way!

Stevie: What?

Karl: Help you find a new line of work! Tam is beginning the productions of an upcoming crime drama!

Stevie: Keep talking.

Karl: They're cast-calling for a slender, Caucasian man in his 20s, with flexible movement. I convinced them to put you up in that position, cuz I saw deep through those doggy eyes that you had potential. And it wasn't one of those non-speaking, background roles. No sir, this is supporting character we're talking.

Stevie: That's great! Hard to believe I've gone to a great start just by wearing a dog suit while somebody else dubbed over my lines! And if this role peaks, I could probably land myself in another rol- Hold it, hold it. Why do all this for me?

Karl: Well, I'm gonna let you in on a little secret. You have always been my favorite, Steven. The others did a fantastic job, but you knew how to bring life into a character.

Stevie: I am, aren't I? Well, I do hold a few charms, here and there. Knew they'd come into full effect soon.

Karl: So, do you take the job?

Stevie: Hell yeah I want the job! And I'd like to thank you for it!

Karl: No need for that! Just doing a favor for my favorite performer! Come over to my place for your script, and I'll explain the details to you over coffee.

Stevie: Make mine extra dark.

Karl: With pleasure!

_____________________

Karl: Hello, hello?

Debbie: Hello, who is- Karl? Karl, is that you?

Karl: In the flesh! But as of right now, in the voice. And while you're still listening to it, Happy Birthday!

Debbie: Awwwww, that's awfully generous. But my birthday isn't until two more days.

Karl: It is? Ooooooh, damn.

Debbie: What is it?

Karl: Seems I've over looked the calender. At least I didn't miss it yet.

Debbie: And it's a good thing you remembered what month it was, too.

Karl: Yeah. Still pretty embarrassing. I even got you a gift.

Debbie: You got me a gift?! Karl, that makes me... ...pleased as punch! Though you really didn't have to go through the troubl-

Karl: Oh no no no, I felt like it, since you are my favorite.

Debbie: Really? I didn't know that! I mean, the most you've ever talked to me was when I was Vinnie Van Goose, with the head on and all.

Karl: Well, the others are special, but if they knew you were my favorite, they would feel less important. You really knew how to bring life into a character more than they did.

Debbie: Oh wow. Though I feel bad for being the favorite. The others worked so hard.

Karl: What they don't know, won't hurt 'em! It's okay! Now, why don't you come over to my place and you can collect your gift? You can either take it to go, or eat it here.

Debbie: "Eat it?"

Karl: Hope you brought your sweet tooth.

Debbie: Oooooh la la, zat sounds deleecious, vahtre ahltesse. [*Chuckles*]

Karl: [*Chuckles back*]

Debbie: That was a really bad impression of the character I played.

Karl: I thought it was decent. So, you coming to get your gift, or what?

Debbie: Hell yeah, I'm going to get it! On one condition, though.

Karl: Hmm?

Debbie: Don't eat it all before I get there. [*Giggles*]

Karl: That's a promise I'm willing to keep! Don't worry! I won't even dip my finger into the frosting!

_____________________

Scott: Who is it?

Karl: That can only mean one thing: Do you recognize my voice?

Scott: K-Karl? Karl! Oh, Karl, you happy-go-lucky son of a bitch! [*Laughs*]

Karl: What, were you expecting someone else?

Scott: Ehhhh, either Mom, or someone I owe money to. [*Laughs*]

Karl: [*Laughs as well*]

Scott: You can't be my mother, sooooooo are you calling me up to pay some acting penalty fee?

Karl: There's just no end to your wisecracks, huh Scotty? Don't be ridiculous. You worked for me, so I'm the one who should be giving you money! Speaking of which, did I ever tell you that you were my favorite?

Scott: I am?

Karl: Sure! None of the other performers knew how to bring life into a character more than you!

Scott: Really? Well, to be honest, I didn't think there was anything special about my character.

Karl: You didn't think-- Look, Scott, he was one of my favorite Critters. When I was designing him, I put a little bit of myself into this character's traits. And to have a person make him animated was a happy experience.

Scott: Wow, Karl. That's...

Karl: Trouble finding the right word?

Scott: Yeah. Kinda. Just feels really neat to be appreciated. Even at a simple task.

Karl: Say no more, my friend! All you have to do is accept your award! No speech please.

Scott: Award? Okay, Karl, this is a little bit much.

Karl: Not really much. Just a bonus check.

Scott: Bonus check? I-I really can't accept this, Karl.

Karl: Please, I insist. You were my favorite Critter, and I wanna show my thanks for such effort you gave.

Scott: I'm not currently having any financial crisis, and I can't take money from you after how nice you've been. Couldn't you thank me in another way? Like, lunch, or dinner-

Karl: Actually, I'd be more than happy if you joined me for this afternoon's brunch, and we can catch up on times. Tomorrow. At my place.

Scott: If that will make you happy, I'll be there.

Karl: Delightful! I'll make sure brunch is still warm when you get here!

_____________________

Drew: Hello?

Karl: Drewwwww! Long time no see!

Drew: KARL! [*Sighs*] Thank God, you're the one to call!

Karl: Gosh, I really wasn't expecting that kind of reaction. You miss the show, too?

Drew: Well, no. Not that it was a bad show, or I hated doing the job! I mean, I loved playing Saxxo!

Karl: Well, Saxxo was my favorite! In fact, so were you! Nobody could bring so much life int-

Drew: Okay thanks I appreciate it Karl! Say, you wouldn't happen to know any positions opened at Tam, do you?

Karl: Tam is currently not looking for any actors at the moment.

Drew: Shhhhhhhh-shit!

Karl: Is everything alright?

Drew: Of course not. Rent's rising, and I have three more days until me and my wife lose the apartment! I just got to find a new job and pay off the rent! Need the money fast! I-I'll do anything!

Karl: Oh my. A debt situation. Does Mary know about it?

Drew: No. And I can't let her know.

Karl: Have you been gambling again?

Drew: [*Awkward silence, then takes a deep breath*] All I ever wanted to do was to treat her to the best romantic getaway in her young life! She thinks I don't pay more attention to her, and I've been less ardent ever since we got married. I love her so much, I really do. I felt like words aren't enough to express how much she means to me, so I thought, perhaps I could show her in another manner! Just wanted to earn a little extra cash, and look what a fine mess I've gotten us into! First it will be our place, next my fucking marriage! You're my only hope, Karl!

Karl: You have my sympathy, old friend. Believe it or not, when I was young, I used to do a bunch of crazy stuff to impress a girl. It's surprising how love can make anyone do anything. Tell you what: I'll give you this check for 100 grand. That way you can both pay off the rent, and give your woman the best dinner, plus a gift.

Drew: Gee. 100,000 dollars. That's a lot of lettuce.

Karl: I was gonna give you this anyways. It's my "Congratulations" gift for all your hard effort at Tam.

Drew: Thank you, Karl! God bless you! I swear I'll pay you back somehow!

Karl: You can pay me back now. ...at my place for some coffee, and we can catch up on our times. Always wanted to have a full conversation with my favorite Critter star.

Drew: Alright, I'll be there. Just as long as we're not getting a little too touchy. What time?

Karl: You can be here right now, if you like.

Drew: I'll go get the car keys!

Karl: Take it slow, Drew. You only live once.

_____________________

Karl: Howdy-do! Nice to hear from you!

Beatrice: Oh hey, Karl! Haven't heard from you since the show's cancellation. Which, by the way, I'm sorry for your loss.

Karl: Heyyyyyyy, no need for pitty. I'm over that now. I've become grateful that they continued to let me work at Tam Studios. Oh, and how far are you due now?

Beatrice: 3 months and 15 days. I made sure to keep track.

Karl: That's wonderful! You know, if Karl's Paradise ran a little longer, you could definitely hide your pregnancy with all that space in your costume.

Beatrice: That's true, though I don't think my doctor would recommend it. The suit is so hot, it's like a walking sauna. Whew! I get all sweaty just thinking of it.

Karl: A hun in the oven with a bun in its oven. That's one for the books. Listen, I've been thinking of you lately.

Beatrice: You know I'm married, Karl.

Karl: No no no no, not like that! I meant thinking about how good of a job you did playing Yum-Yum. You made her feel so warm, and loving. I knew during that one audition, you were her. You surely brought life into that character.

Beatrice: Okay, thanks, but doesn't her voice actress deserve some credit, too?

Karl: Shanna was spectacular, but I don't think she could take on such a physical role. How you handled Yum-Yum was what made you my favorite.

Beatrice: Me? Your favorite? Hah hah, I didn't know you thought that way of me. Though, you always appeared enthusiastic whenever I was in full costume.

Karl: That's how much you thrilled me! Seeing Yum-Yum become animated was a sensation to behold! We show creators take great pride in our works, you know.

Beatrice: Interesting. Well, see you next time, Karl.

Karl: Woah woah, wait! Take these words to mind before you hang up! Please?

Beatrice: Guess I can stay on hold for a little longer.

Karl: Great! Like I said before, I've been thinking of you lately. I know I didn't show much excitement when you first openly confessed about the baby. My favorite deserves better. So, I went out of my way to get the little tot a gift!

Beatrice: A gift? Aww, Karl, you shouldn't have. It's a little too early to start receiving gifts.

Karl: Oh, I insist! Besides, in three days, I'm off on a little business trip, and won't be back in a couple of months. So, I thought of giving you the gift now!

Beatrice: Oh, that's nice! Are you gonna drop it off here?

Karl: No, frankly, I don't know where your location is. I was wondering if you could come by my place and pick it up. You still have the address I gave you and the other performers, right?

Beatrice: Yeah, but... I'm not sure if I wanna go. I've never been to your place before, and I find it weird to come over to another house just to pick up a measely present.

Karl: C'mon, Beatrice. I'm no stranger to you. Besides, I just baked cookies.

Beatrice: Cookies?

Karl: Your favorite. Chocolate chip, soft, and with ooey melty chocolatey goodness.

Beatrice: [*Short silence*] Okay, you win! That's an offer I can't refuse! I'll just have a quick trip, grab a couple of cookies, take the present, and leave!

Karl: Atta girl! I'll get a doggy bag ready!

Beatrice: Don't try to make a pass at me!

Karl: Wouldn't dream of it, Yum-Yum.

_____________________

Clifton: Karl, what the hell is this?

Karl: Cliff! I see you got my message!

Clifton: Yes, and whatever it is, I want no part of it.

Karl: Jesus, why the bitterness?

Clifton: Not only did the Karl's Paradise experience left me humiliated, but it also hurt me seeing my daughter get terrified of a character I played. The show gave her nightmares twice!

Karl: Ooooh, I'm sorry to hear that. But if it makes you feel better, this isn't about the show. It's about a whole new start.

Clifton: Baby, n-not now. Please. Daddy over here busy.

Karl: Pardon?

Clifton: Oh, I wasn't talking to you! I was talking to Beth. You know, my daughter? And what is this "whole new start?"

Karl: I'd like to propose a new proposition. It pays more than your previous gig.

Clifton: "Pays more." Is it another acting pursuit?

Karl: Why yes! Tam is starting the production of a new crime drama, and they're cast-calling for a black-American male, with a tone body, and flexible movement.

Clifton: They're looking for a black man in a program about crimes? Pfftt, I certainly don't like the sound of that.

Karl: Oh no, it's not what you think! I mean they want someone to play one of the lead heroes! I talked to them about giving it to you. Don't you wanna take a step further into your acting goal?

Clifton: Well... Yeah, and it all sounds really great! But I don't think I'm ready to hit that road yet.

Karl: Huh?

Clifton: Well, the crime drama thing seems a little bit... How should I put it? ...complex. Right now, my acting experience is limited. All I did on Karl's Paradise was put on a suit, move around, and grab things. I didn't even get to speak my own voice. Literally. I think I should take it slow for the time being. Tell them I'm gonna have to pass up.

Karl: C'mon, Cliff! Never say die unless you try! This job will mark the beginning of your big break!

Clifton: I don't know-

Karl: With all that money, you could provide your family all what they deserve! You've always talked about how they mean the world to you! Your wife will always be happy, your mother will live more healthy, and your daughter could be enrolled with the best educational systems! You could even buy a bigger house! If you feel you're not ready, we could have training lessons over at my place! I even got a copy of the script!

Clifton: Why does it matter so much to you whether I get the role or not?

Karl: I kept this between myself and I for very long, and I think I ought to let it out now: You have always been my favorite, Cliff. The character, in which you portrayed, was very important to me. When I first designed that character, I projected some of my attributes onto him. Then, you had put on the suit and made him animated. I knew you'd be the one. He was exactly how I pictured him in my head.

Clifton: Well, I would admit I did do a good job, but I wouldn't call it a stellar performance.

Karl: Don't beat on yourself, Cliff! In my opinion, it WAS a stellar performance! And dare I add, you are a family man, right? I'm a sucker for families! Especially children! That's why I gotten into children's entertainment! To make them glow in happiness!

Clifton: [*Inaudible mumbles*]

Karl: What was that?

Clifton: I, I said, I guess I can give it a shot. The money would do me and my family good. The bills need to be paid, and Beth has been twitterpated for an Easy Bake Oven.

Karl: Great! Come visit whenever you're available! I'll put on a fresh pot of coffee!

Clifton: Tomorrow. I'll let my wife know.

Karl: Oh, no no! Cliff, we don't wanna ruin the surprise!

Clifton: Man, if I just sneaked to some place without telling Janet, she'll get the expression that I'm seeing another woman!

Karl: Don't worry! If she gets suspicious, I'll cover for you! It's all in my hands! Trust me!

Clifton: Alright. But one more thing: If I don't nail this role, do not pester me over a new career ever again.

Karl: Cross my heart and hope to die!

_____________________

Karl: Hello, Rebecca!

Rebecca: Oh my god- Karl! You have every nerve calling me up! You of all people!

Karl: I know! Did you miss me?

Rebecca: Like I miss a kidney stone! Good-fucking-bye!

Karl: Wait, don't hang up!

Rebecca: If you're calling me because your show's been picked up again, no use talking me into it! I've never been so embarrassed in my life! My friends still won't let me live it down, and my brother-in-law keeps making long distant calls just to tease me about the damn shark! And I couldn't stand looking at those costumes, even my own! What the hell were you thinking?

Karl: I just thought you suited the role so much. The way you brought life into the character really made you my favorite!

Rebecca: I don't care, and I was talking about those costumes! How could you not see how terrifying they were? You gave a goose teeth! A goose with teeth!

Karl: They're not that bad! Just wanted to give them a little cartoony-ness in their appearances!

Rebecca: Karl, they made kids cry! They're THAT bad! It's like they came from Sesame Street Reject Hell!

Karl: [*A moment of silence, then, angry breathing is heard*]

Rebecca: You still there?

Karl: Yes. I'm still here. The reason I called was to ask you a favor regarding the show. Also, it's still pulled off the air. I'm making a biography based on experience working on Karl's Paradise. I interview you, and you give me all your views on the show, whether they are positive, or negative.

Rebecca: Forget it. Now if you excuse me, I have to hunt a new job. One where I possibly don't have to show my face.

Karl: I'll pay you!

Rebecca: What?

Karl: The exact same amount as your salary from Tam! Please! Just come to my place, answer a few questions, and you'll never see my face again!

Rebecca: [*Sighs*] You're a sad man, Karl. Alright, I'll do it. Throw in a couple of snacks, with some iced tea, and you have yourself a deal.

Karl: Lucky for you, I always bring out the refreshments to guests!

_____________________

Sam: Who is it?

Karl: Double-K, that's who. [*Giggles*]

Sam: Oh, hi Karl! Didn't think you'd call me all of a sudden. Are you still down over the show's cancelization?

Karl: Nahhhh. That's all in the past now. I'm working on a new project at Tam, and it's far better than my last one.

Sam: Ohhhh. Glad to hear that you've moved on. I must say: Although Kar- [*Sneezes*] Excuse me...

Karl: No, bless you!

Sam: Thanks. As I was saying; Although Karl's Paradise wasn't the best experience I ever had, it sure was a fun one. I actually started to take a liking to Mama LongLegs.

Karl: Yeah, you were always cut out for her. When you showed up for that audition back in '88, and you first put on that suit, that was the day my Mama LongLegs was discovered. You nailed every aspect of her character, minus the voice.

Sam: And you know something funny? I didn't think I'd get the role with my height and all. Mama LongLegs could've been given to any one of those women under 5'8. Nice of you to care more about personalities than looks.

Karl: Wise Miss you are. That's why you've always been my favorite.

Sam: I am? Oh gosh, I don't know what to say...

Karl: How 'bout "yes?"

Sam: Excuse me?

Karl: I mean, how's about coming over to my house for a couple of photoshoots? ...in costume? The other cast is involved as well. Even though the show is cancelled, they're still giving me the right to merchandise it. All I need right now is your approval.

Sam: Oh. Well, sounds fun!

Karl: It sure is! I'll even put on a fresh pot of coffee!

Sam: I'll be there! Also, [*Jokingly tone*] for this photoshoot, I won't be taking anything off, will I?

Karl: I'm not that kind of man! Don't worry, you'll be fully covered! You're just wearing the costume, and that's it.

_____________________

Leon: What's up? I don't really care who you are. Just get down to the skinny. Blah blah blah blah.

Karl: Leon, it's me.

Leon: You're gonna have to be more specific. I don't know any "Me's."

Karl: Karl Rodriguez! Don't you remember?

Leon: Ohhhh yeaaah, the Karl's Paradise man. What's the big idea giving me this ring while the show is cancelled?

Karl: Well, to clarify-

Leon: Even if it's not, I don't think I wanna come back anytime soon. Like, that whole show, I don't mean to hurt your feelings, is kinda bogus.

Karl: I know, but-

Leon: Man... I wouldn't have stayed if it weren't for the money. And the free Dunkin' every morning. As for those costumes... wayyyyyy fucking creepy to the max. They'd make great props for a halloween haunted house, though. Wish I could've took mine with me.

Karl: Are you finished?

Leon: Shoot.

Karl: *Ahem* As I was saying; what you just mentioned is exactly what I called for!

Leon: You're gonna pay me? You're gonna buy me Dunkin'?

Karl: No, but how would you like to take your costume home with you? You can scare the shit out of kids every halloween, as much as you want!

Leon: Ehhhh, it isn't money or greasy donuts, but it'll do. I'll take it. Alright, when are you gonna deliver it to me?

Karl: Ha ha ha ha. No, you have to come down to my place and pick it up. Because, frankly, I never did get your address.

Leon: Whatt... No way. I am not getting off my ass, driving a mile block, just to pick up a damn costume. Forget it. The thing would probably eat my soul while I'm sleeping anyways.

Karl: There's Dunkin' in it for you! Along with an iced coffee.

Leon: Dammit, Karl. You know my weakness too well. I'll get my keys.

Karl: That's the spirit! Hey, did I mention you were always my favorite?

#The Banana Splits Movie #Remake #horror #Masklophobia #original characters

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aggedyann · 3 years

Text

Making Himself Worse

“It’s almost like you’re trying to make yourself worse,” Tim fussed, watching Ethan sneeze while pulling his scrub top over his head. “Bless you.” He sighed.

“I’m fine.” Ethan tried to sound reassuring, but his congestion belied him.

Tim sighed. “You’re not getting better. You’ve been sick all week.”

“It’s just a cold.”

“That kept you up all night.”

Ethan couldn’t argue that point. His cough had certainly been persistent, and when it had given him a break, he’d woken himself up sneezing.

“I’ve got to go to work.” He explained, patiently. “Full schedule that would have to be rebooked. Diabetes class to teach today, too.” He cleared his throat against the hoarseness.

Tim sighed. “Don’t forget to take your voice.” He called after Ethan as he left the room, pretending not to notice as he flipped him off.

Tim pulled the blankets over his head and tried to go back to sleep; it was 5:30 am after all, and he’d been out late celebrating the show getting picked up for another 13 weeks. He could hear Ethan sneezing his way around the bathroom and then the kitchen and wondered how many sneezes were due to Ethan’s typical morning sneezes and how many were from his cold.

He heard the front door close without Ethan popping back in to kiss him goodbye. Momentarily sulky beneath the blankets, he rolled over, covers over his head and went back to sleep. If Ethan wanted to be a stubborn ass, so be it; he was the one who’d suffer the consequences.

“Hatshoo!” Ethan walked into the staff office and swapped his hoodie for his scrub jacket, immediately burying a sneeze in its sleeve.

“Thought you would have called in today.” Toby said in lieu of bless you.

Ethan grabbed a tissue off his desk. “I’mb finde.” He sniffled.

“Fine is spelled with an ‘n’.”

This was met with a glare from Ethan over his tissue as he blew his nose. “I’m fiNe.”

“You’re here?” Lisa walked in and dropped her purse on the chair next to him. Ethan pretended not to notice as she handed over cash to Toby who whispered “told you.”

“It’s just a cold.” Ethan rasped, sitting down at his workstation.

“God, your voice is shot.”

“Thanks.”

“Yeah, how am I supposed to teach with the voiceless sneeze machine?”

“Shut up, Toby. I’m not that bad.” Ethan glanced up at the white board with the room assignments. “I’m in 10? I thought I was in 7.”

“We moved you in the corner. That way only Neely has to listen to you sneeze all day.”

“Lucky me.” Neely commented, walking in and sitting down in front of her computer.

“Sorry.” Ethan apologized. Neely had been working with him all week, and had been more patient than the others in putting up with his coughing and sneezes.

She shrugged. “After 3 years of your hay fever, I’m used to it.”

Ethan shot her a grateful look. At least she wasn’t betting on if he’d call in.

“How are you feeling?” She asked.

He shrugged. “It’s a cold. I’m ok. I’ll rest up this weekend.” He assured her as Tiffany walked in.

“You’re seriously here? You can’t even talk.” She stepped over to Toby and slipped him some cash.

Ethan muffled another loud sneeze in his jacket collar. “Ahshoo! It’s just-“

“A cold. We know.” Toby finished for him. “I’ll see you at 2.”

Ethan grabbed his tissues and the box of masks he’d been using. “Anyone else got any comments?” He snipped. “If not, I’m going to get to work.”

2:15 diabetes ed. Ethan could all but breathe a sigh of relief. Well, if his clogged sinuses would let him. He blew his nose again, attempting to clear out the congestion, dumped hand sanitizer on his hands, then took a long drink of water. Taking a trip to the fountain, he set his water bottle under the automated water dispenser and filled it, then headed back to the room.

Toby hadn’t given him too much hell after the first class, so Ethan knew he had it coming after this one. He sucked hard on his cough drop as Toby brought the half dozen participants in.

He pulled his mask down as Toby introduced himself as the dietitian, and when given an expectant look, spoke up for his introduction. “I’m Ethan.” His voice cracked, and he saw his teammate bite back a smile. He cleared his throat. “I’m Ethan. I’m the diabetes educator. As you can probably tell, I’ve got somewhat of a cold.”

A laugh, disguised as a cough from Toby.

He turned to glance at Toby. “Hope I haven’t given it to you.” He managed a syrupy tone despite his hoarse voice.

“Never better.” Toby came back in the same tone. “Would you like to get started?”

“Hah-Ahchoo!” Ethan hesitated, turned around and sneezed powerfully, tucking his masked face into his elbow. Sniffling, he straightened up, sanitizing his hands again.

“Bless. Now that that’s out of the way?”

Ethan provided a quick overview of diabetes, the differences between type I and type II and that this course would focus on type II. He switched to medications, being interrupted by a second, equally powerful sneeze, this time blessed by the entire class. “Ahtshoo! Excuse me.” He managed, blushing. “I’ve got to change my mask.”

Toby jumped in. “Let’s take 5. Ethan’s portion gets a little dense. He’s almost done though.” Ethan shot him a relieved glance and ducked off to the empty staff office. He managed to clear his nose slightly, clearing his ghost of a voice and slipped a new mask on.

He finished his spiel on medications and switched over to assisting Toby with creating carb counting plates for 45 minutes, only interrupting Toby once with a poorly timed sneeze.

Toby transitioned back to him for the second hands on portion of the class. Checking blood sugars. Ethan grabbed the kit work had assigned him and began to demonstrate, narrating as he set up the machine, wiped his finger down, poked it, and placed the blood on the strip. “138.” He read, when the meter beeped.

Toby frowned. “High for you.” He whispered.

“Sick.” Ethan whispered back. “This cold is kicking my ass.” As if to prove his point, he buried another harsh sneeze in his forearm.

“Bless.” Toby frowned again, then began handing out meters.

He provided back up as Ethan made his way around the table, making sure each student was able to check their blood sugar, noticing for the first time how pale Ethan was. How pronounced the dark circles were beneath his eyes. A twinge of guilt briefly passed through him for betting on Ethan showing up, and, like Ethan, he couldn’t be more ready for 4:30.

It was pouring rain when Ethan left the clinic. He walked the two blocks to his car, wishing he’d brought his jacket instead of his hoodie – he was soaked. “HahShoo!” He sneezed freely, aiming it towards the ground, as he unlocked his car. It was a slow drive home…the rain and an accident on the freeway slowed traffic, doubling his commute time. Ethan, drenched, shivered and sneezed the entire drive home.

At the apartment, Tim was beginning to fret. Ethan was typically home by now. He reached for his phone to try calling, when he heard the door open, followed by a loud “Ahshoo!” announcing Ethan’s presence.

He looked over to see Ethan, wiping his nose on a wad of rain drenched tissues. Ethan was soaked from head to toe. Tim grabbed the box of tissues, handed it to Ethan, taking the useless wad of tissues from his hand.

Ethan took fresh tissues and blew his nose. He looked up at Tim, shivering.

“You’re drenched.” Tim stated the obvious.

“It’s pouring rain.” As did Ethan.

“Go get out of those wet things. Take a hot shower before you make your cold worse. I’ll have soup ready when you’re done.”

Ethan nodded, swiping at his nose with the tissue. His sinuses were still blocked, but the chill had caused it to start dripping. He grabbed clean joggers and a sweatshirt, then slipped into the shower.

Tim began heating the chicken soup he had made earlier. He could hear Ethan sneeze from the shower and winced. He definitely sounded worse than when he’d left this morning.

20 minutes later, Ethan was out of the shower and in dry clothes, making his way to the kitchen. Tim set a bowl of soup before him. “This should finish warming you up.”

Ethan ate the soup, beginning to look drowsy.

“You’re worn out.” Tim commented gently.

Ethan clapped his napkin to his nose. “Hatshoo! Yeah.” He slowly admitted, shivering.

“And still chilled. I know it’s just after 7…but…��

“Laying down sounds nice.”

“We can watch a movie in bed. Maybe take the NyQuil early…I’ll wake you for your snack.”

Ethan nodded, coughing as Tim placed his bowl in the sink. “Go. I’ll be right there.”

Ethan was under the covers when Tim came in carrying an extra blanket and the thermometer. He dropped the blanket over Ethan and scanned the thermometer across his forehead. “99.6.” He sighed. “I told you you’d make your cold worse. If you leave this bed this weekend, it’s for the couch.”

“Ahshoo!” Ethan smothered another harsh sneeze into a tissue.

“Bless you. You want to watch your favorite?”

Ethan shrugged, yawning. Tim found “Jurassic Park” in their video library and put it on, laying next to Ethan, relaxing as Ethan’s sneezing grew sleepier and less frequent until it was replaced by congested snores.

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nicistrying · 3 years

Text

this is gonna be a long work rant re: my post yesterday about closing up with my manager and not wanting to fuck up so feel free to scroll on past, I just need to vent somewhere 🙄

I got in at 3.30 after he asked me to start early and he said there was quite a lot to do. I thought I could probably get a reasonable amount of it done. Started with helping my friend get our usual work on frozen out of the way which took from 4-6pm. He'd asked me to work the chiller, change over a deals cabinet and put some tickets out by 9. It'll be tight but if I go fast enough it is possible!

Started working the chiller and some guys turned up with a cherry picker saying they needed to fix the air con but couldn't start working until we closed at 9, and would be working for 2 hours. So my manager comes to me and asks me to stay til 11 bc there have to always be at least 2 staff. The other 3 people who were in all live further away and don't drive so I said I would.

Working the chiller somehow took until 8.30, manager did the deals changeover bc time and I took my break bc I was starving.

9pm comes around and we can't find his keys to get into the office to get into the safe to be able to bring the tills to cash up. We found them by 9.20 so I ran down to empty the tills, but the keyring that these tiny keys are on is broken so they keep falling INTO the counter caches (deep metal boxes with fiddly bits in them which are intentionally difficult to get your hand in. Thankfully I have tiny hands and managed to get them out after a few tries and a lot of cussing).

I could not for the life of me get the safe open even though I KNOW how to do it, and have opened it several times before. My manager is laughing to try to calm me down but I'm just getting really panicky and embarrassed bc I've already told him he makes me really nervous and I always fuck up when he's there. He came to show me something earlier and I got flustered and he's standing there laughing saying why are you going red. It's not that he's intimidating or anything, I just really want him to know I can do my job but bc I want that so badly I end up fucking up. He eventually has to open the safe for me and I finally start cashing up at 9.30 and everything is going fine, he's left to do other stuff, 3 tills are pretty much balanced, I get to the last one and it's £10 over. So I text him to come in the office. He recounts it and it is indeed £10 over so he declares it.

He asks me to count the safe and I'm so panicky by this point that I have to count everything twice bc I'm so convinced I've miscounted somewhere, I give him my numbers and he puts them into the computer. The safe is now £30 over and we have no idea why. So he has to start counting everything again himself and I'm just sitting tensed up in my chair by now, just panicking and thinking if I don't do anything I can't do anything wrong, but he'll think I'm not capable of doing it myself, so I ask what I can do that's actually useful. He remembers about stuff on the shop floor that he'd forgotten about, so I go do that while he finishes recounting. He comes out at 10.45 and says he figured it out and the wrong money was in the first till I did by myself 🤦🏼‍♀️ So I'm extra embarrassed and feel dumb as fuck.

I tell him this and that I'm worried he just won't actually be able to leave me to ever close up by myself, and he tries to make me feel better by saying I can just do early shifts instead. I didn't really say anything back bc I kind of took that as confirmation that he agrees I probably can't do it. I know that's not actually what he meant bc he just kept saying I'll get better etc etc but I just felt so shit and it was such a knock to my confidence (which I did not need) bc I know I can do all of it myself, I've done it all myself before and been totally fine because I was in with deputy manager who is super chill about everything and just lets me get on until I ask a question. Which is what he did last night too, he even left the room so i would panic less but I still fucked it up.

We finally leave work at 11pm. He showed me his baby car seat in the back of his car all ready for when his baby boy arrives (not due until July. It was adorable). Matthew pulls up to pick me up and I tell him I fucked up. My manager is super nice about it and says 'she did not fuck up she just freaked out everything is fine she's fine she just needs to calm down' and I give him the finger because he was also very much freaking out. We all laugh and say goodnight.

I get in the car and have the actual panic attack I've been trying to hold off all night and cry to Matthew for a good 10 minutes solid when we get home.

I've woken up this morning still feeling a LOT of residual stress and anixety AND I came on which explains the whole fucking thing but I can't really tell my manager that. I thought about texting him to apoligise for having such a shitty attitude but I'll just leave it bc the less I say to him the less weird shit can come out. I'll laugh it off on Friday when I see him. I just feel bad bc at one point I told him I didn't want the keys or the responsibility any more and that he should give them to someone else. He laughed and told me to fuck off lmao and said I don't have a choice bc he's told his bosses he's training me and this other guy and he insisted I'll be fine eventually but ugh. I'm annoyed at myself for having such an awful attitude but I now know it was partly down to hormones which is kind of a relief but kind of just sucks. Trying to look on the bright side, I'm just grateful that he recognises that I have such low confidence and is willing to work with me like this rather than just giving me the keys and hoping for the best.

It's 9am and I have a lot of housework to do before I go back into work at 12 and I just feel so anxious and overwhelmed by it that I genuinely want to call in sick. I can't do that bc I'll get into a depression spiral if I'm sat at home by myself and I'm hoping that once I'm there I'll be okay bc deputy is in charge today and I love her. Might actually go in early just to ask for reassurance tbh.

I have a lot of other stuff I really need to do and organise for the weekend but I can't think about it right now bc even getting up and washing the dishes feels overwhelming atm. Hoping I'll feel good enough to text some people and make some plans when I finish tonight. 🤞🏻

#sorry for the rant #matthew has already left for the day and i was just thinking about it all in circles #i actually feel better for splurging it all out somewhere #personal #anxiety #stress #mental health #work #confidence

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kittybellestark · 4 years

Text

This is kinda an endgame fix-it of sorts. Tony is alive.

After the snap Peter and May were poor.

They were lucky to get an apartment with two bedrooms. They really were. And it was still in queens which was nice. But they were starting from scratch.

The government was useless. Well, maybe not useless, they were doing they’re best with the missing people from five years ago suddenly return. They had to deal with all of the deaths caused by the return, as well as all the now displaced people. Undoing the death certificates, finding any missing people. The government was doing a lot.

But it didn’t feel like it. Those who were snapped out of existence didn’t have their savings anymore. Or their jobs. They were entitled to ‘financial compensation,’ but that could take years to get, and would probably end up costing more then they’d get.

So, May and Peter were currently poor. And while their apartment seemed nice enough, it was pretty run down. They were lucky that Pepper had lent them one of the Stark’s many homes in New York until they found a place for as long as she did. With Tony having been in a coma for as long as he had been, and is still dealing with recovery, it felt wrong to intrude in such a way.

They’re new apartment has already been broken into twice. And May and Peter were currently sharing a cellphone where they bought minutes as they needed. May was finding small jobs here and there that was enough to cover the bills. And Peter was chipping in where he could.

Then the ceiling in May’s bedroom started to collapse. And while typically this would be the part that Tony would swoop in and save the day, May and Peter currently had no way to reach of to him, and Tony was still deep into recovery, still not permitted to even stand on his own.

Peter and May started putting money aside where they could to get the ceiling fixed. It was April and school had been cancelled until at least September to deal with the influx of students. So Peter got a full time job as a bartender while he isn’t actually old enough to serve or drink his ID is technically doesn’t say he’s too young either. And May finally found a full time position working for a non-profit that pays well enough to help relocate people after the snap.

May’s mattress is brought over to Peter’s room, (because the living room is too small and doesn’t have a couch yet, only too foldable chair and a little table in between) and they become roommates.

After 3 months they still don’t have enough money to fix the ceiling and Peter is feeling antsy.

May likes to sleep with the lights off, and Peter doesn’t want to tell her that the dark makes him think about the battle, or space, or the time he crashed an airplane, or when he was trapped under a building.

May goes to bed early because she has to wake up early, which means that Peter doesn’t get to be alone very often.

Peter misses having privacy.

He misses getting changed in his bedroom.

And crying without worrying about waking up the person a few feet away.

He misses having a place solely his own.

Peter understands why this is happening. He gets it. He knows they’re poor right now. Peter knows that they can’t afford to fix the ceiling. And he feels guilty. And selfish for wanting a place of his own.

He feels so selfish when he looks down at the pizza him and May just ate -because they were both over tired and their stove broke- and sees it as a luxury. Sees the money that could have gone to giving him his room back. He feels selfish for putting money on their shared cellphone so that he can check the internet to see if Ned or MJ were also snapped. To see if the news knows about Tony’s recovery.

Peter feels guiltly and horrible for just wanting to be alone for longer than a shower. He just wants to be able to be alone.

When Happy spots Peter when he’s walking home from work at 3am, Peter feels guilty for taking the offer for the ride home. He’s wasting Happy’s money. He’s wasting Pepper’s and Tony’s money. He feels like a burden.

“How come you haven’t come round to visit boss yet? I thought you too were close.”

Happy doesn’t want to say that he misses the kid. Doesn’t want to tell Peter he’s concerned over the hallowed cheeks and sunken eyes. He wants to see if Peter is okay, but without the kid feeling like he’s put on the spot.

“Don’t know where he is.” Peter responds simply with a shrug.

The way Peter slurs his words slightly along with the raggedy look of the kid are some massive red flags for Happy. Peter isn’t going off on some tangent about anything and it isn’t right.

“If you called I could have given you a ride.” Happy tries to sound nonchalant, looking at Peter in the rear view mirror, the kid doesn’t even perk up.

“Gotta have a phone for that, Happy. And your phone number.”

Happy pulls over to where the Parker’s used to live. Where things were good and happy and there was no snap. And there was no missing out on five years of life or sharing a bedroom, it was just another day.

“You guys still live here?” Happy asks, hoping for something to turn the conversation around, hoping for something, anything.

“No, but I can walk the rest of the way, it’s no big deal.”

“Not happening.”

Happy pulls back out onto the road taking Peter out of Queens to visit Tony and Pepper and Morgan. Hopefully that’ll cheer the kid up. Morgan is the cutest kid, so it’s impossible to be upset by her. And now that Tony is doing better it’s bound to have Peter rambling in no time.

“Happy, Happy, what are you doing? You need to pull over. C’mon man, not cool. I gotta work tomorrow. Let me out!” Peter tried the open the doors to no avail not thinking to unlock it.

“Peter I’m just taking you to the Lakehouse, just for a night.”

“I have to work tomorrow Happy, I can’t not go. Just let me out.”

Peter felt desperate, and selfish. Tears were in his eyes and he was seconds away from crying. He couldn’t miss work. Couldn’t miss out on the money that went towards his privacy. Towards having his room back.

As Happy turned to pull into the driveway for the Lakehouse it was turning to 4am and the kitchen light was on. Peter felt the tears escape and he couldn’t call May, or his job and they needed the money.

“Happy, please.” Peter tried again.

Happy and Peter both got out the car, Peter trudging behind, dreading the idea of intruding on someone else. He didn’t want to be there and he was sure he wasn’t wanted.

They both walked in, gathering the attention of Pepper, who was making food in her pajamas. Pepper looked up and smiled at Happy, not seeing Peter who has hidden himself behind Happy.

“Look at who I found wandering through the streets of Queens.” Happy pulled Peter out from behind himself to show off the boy to Pepper.

“Wandering through the streets? Peter, honey I know you’re enhanced but it’s not safe to be walking through Queens in the middle of the night.”

Pepper moved and gave Peter a hug, surprised at how skinny he way. He wore enough layers that it wasn’t that obvious in any place other than his face, but when she squeezed him. All there was, was bones.

Peter didn’t respond verbally, only a slight shrug, and that was so out of character for him it nearly had Pepper reeling.

“Let me make you some breakfast.” Pepper nodded to herself before moving back into the kitchen to make Peter some food too.

“I really shouldn’t be staying long.” Peter broke the silence finally when Pepper got him to sit with food infront of him.

“You just got here, honey, there’s no rush. We missed you.”

Peter doesn’t really believe her.

“I have to go to work. I can’t miss work.”

Pepper gives Peter a look. A look that he’s received multiple times from May, the look a parent gives when they’re trying to figure out if their child is lying. It’s the squinting eyes and the frown, with the one corner of the mouth turned up.

“I’m sure you can take the day off.” Pepper’s tone has an air of finality to it. “We’ll get May here tomorrow. It’s been too long since we’ve last seen you guys.”

Peter shrugged, feeling tired and defeated. Fighting Pepper is a battle Peter doesn’t ever want to take up. Sometimes you just need to accept your losses. This is one of those times.

“Can I use your phone to call in then? I’m supposed to work at noon.”

Peter held onto his head with both of his hands, already coming up with an excuse to why he can’t come in.

“Didn’t you just finish your shift? Why would you work at noon.” Happy snorted, clearly not believing Peter having a job.

“It’s called working a double. My shifts are 12pm-2am. Now could I please call in?”

“I’ll call for you honey, where do you work?”

Ah, shit. This wasn’t a turn that Peter was expecting. He didn’t think that he would have to tell Pepper where he’d work.

“Death & Company.”

“Excuse you?”

“I work at Death & Company. That speakeasy styled bar where we all wear bowties and suspenders. It’s pretty rich people stuff, I’m sure you heard of it Pepper.”

“Peter, impossible. You’re sixteen, they wouldn’t hire a minor.”

“Except the fact that my ID say’s I’m 21. I just happen to be the type of guy that they like to hire. Also the tips are really good.”

“You can’t work there. I won’t allow it. I’m sure May and Tony would agree with me.”

Peter groaned, dropping his head onto the table. He didn’t want to do this. He was tired and missed having privacy and he was doing something good. Sure, maybe he got the job for selfish reasons. And maybe he’d stay a little later most shifts and have a drink or two with his coworkers. It’s not like it’s illegal anymore. Might as well reap the benefits of being a legal adult while still 16.

“May actually knows where I work and is grateful that I’m helping out while not in school. Four months ago it would have been a problem, or I guess five years ago, but now we need the extra cash. Besides, you don’t own me, I’m not your child, I’m technically a legal adult and therefore can work at a bar. The last time either May or I have spoken to you was right after the snap, and the last time I talked to Tony was during the battle. You didn’t give us anyway to contact you, and the only reason I’m here is because Happy brought me here even though I asked to be dropped at home. You can’t just decide to show up in my life now and tell me what I can and can’t do. You haven’t been here and you don’t get to choose to be here for me now.”

“Peter, I’m so sorry that we’ve ignored you, but there’s been a lot going on, we’ve just got Tony back home and he’s able to do things again, and there’s Morgan and the company too. It’s been a lot.”

Peter felt tears in his eyes. He didn’t like doing this. He didn’t want to, but he might still be a little drunk. It’s been exhausting and he hasn’t gotten to talk about it with anyone, and now Pepper is here and it’s convenient.

“We’ve been threatened with homelessness multiple times, we’ve been robbed twice, our roof has caved in, we have one phone where we buy minutes when we need it, we don’t have hot water, our appliances barely work, May is working two jobs that don’t pay anywhere’s near as much as her old one and I’m working as well and sometimes we have to choose which utilities are more important to us. May had to talk a week off of work last month because she got the flu, knocked her down pretty good. I wanted her to go to the hospital because her fever hit 105 degrees, we couldn’t really afford it before everything either, but it would have been doable. Now she didn’t want to be brought to the hospital because it’d be cheaper for her to die and wouldn’t lead to me being homeless. We had our electricity and water shut down for a little while because of that.” Peter took in a big breath, trying to reign in his frustration, trying not to take it out on Pepper. “I understand that you’ve been through a lot these last few months, years even, but so have I. It isn’t your fault, but you’ve also not been there, so please don’t try to force yourself into a situation you will never understand. I need my job. May needs me to have my job. This isn’t about what you or Tony want, it isn’t about what you do and don’t like. It’s about what May and I need. And that happens to be me working at a bar for the unforeseeable future.”

The two sat in silence, and Happy backed his way out of the kitchen. It was clear that Pepper was processing Peter’s words. It was a lot. He couldn’t blame her for that. Or for her not being there. It happens. Life gets in the way.

“Okay. I’m sorry. I’m really sorry Peter. I’ll call them for you. Just the one day, and then you can go back to work if you’d like. For now why don’t you go to bed sleep a little bit. Then you can see Tony and meet Morgan.”

‘Meet Morgan.’ Because Peter hasn’t done that yet. Because Peter hasn’t been important enough to meet her before. Or important enough to see Tony. Maybe Peter just isn’t important. He’s an intern. Just an intern. Always will be an intern.

“Sure, tha-that’s fine.”

“Okay, you can take the first bedroom on the left. On this floor.”

Peter nodded with a mumbled thanks, moving out of his spot and to guest bedroom. When he entered the room it was obvious it was made for visitors. There wasn’t anything personal in there. Queen size bed, white comforter, white pillows with a colourful quilt. A tall dresser and desk, an ensuite bathroom and walk-in closet.

It was too much. Way too much. It’s probably a memory foam mattress. He doesn’t deserve this. He wanted privacy, not to abandon May in a time of need. Peter just wanted his room back, not to be sicced on Pepper or Tony when they’re also in a time of need. All he needed was his creaky twin size mattress on his nearly okay bed frame, in his dingy bedroom that totally didn’t have mold or mice. All he needed was to be able to go to his own bedroom at night and be alone, not in this knock-off hotel room.

May deserved it. Not him. May deserved better than him. Better than what she got.

“I need another drink.” Peter groaned, closing the door behind him and through the room. He opened the window, throwing himself and his bag outside.

The fresh air coming off the lake helped calm Peter’s nerves. The sun rose in colours of pink and orange and red. There were still stars in the sky and the moon too.

Peter found himself being drawn to the docks. He sat down at the edge, pulling out a bottle of whiskey. The bottle was still mostly full, so he took a swig hoping for it to solve any problems. Of course it didn’t. It never could, why would it start now? Just because Peter was seated on the Stark’s dock, using up valuable resources, money and space didn’t mean that anything would be solved. It just meant that the sinking feeling in his stomach grew heavier and heavier.

He should be at home. Dreading work, but grateful for the extra money. He should be in his shared bedroom with May. He should be doing more. May should be the one swept off her feet and given a day off. Why should he have anything good? Why should he be sitting here, privileged, when others are struggling much worse than he is.

He takes another swig.

It doesn’t burn anymore. Not like it used to.

“You know, Whiskey was the first drink I ever had. Mind you, I was six years old and told I needed to drink it to show how grown up I was. I’m sure there’s a different reason as to why you’re drinking.”

Tony’s voice shock’s Peter’s system. There’s electric currents and his vision whites out for a second, he nearly drops his bottle. Peter can’t stop himself to turn around, finding Tony standing there, keeping himself up with a cane, his right arm a prosthesis, and healing burns up his face. Tony has a sad smile on his face as he carefully maneuvers himself to sit down next to Peter.

“I know that look.” Peter says carefully. “It’s not your fault.”

“Peter, you’re drinking.” Tony huffs, pulling the bottle from Peter’s hand.

“Don’t put this on yourself. It’s not like I drink all the time. Only after my shift sometimes. I’m legal, technically, and it’s not hurting anyone. Controlled environment with other adults. The whiskey was a gift from the owners because I bring in the most customers.”

Peter laughed, it was a heartbroken, self-deprecating laugh. The tips of his ears were red, and Tony noticed how Peter’s eyes were bloodshot and filled with tears. Tony was surprised to see that Peter was also skinnier, his cheekbones and jaw more prominent, his collarbone popping more and his spine visible through the sweater.

“So then why?” Tony asked, testing the waters a little bit.

This was the first conversation he was having with Peter after five years. Their first conversation and it isn’t one of happiness. Tony finally gets to talk to his kid and he’s scarred he’ll push Peter into closing off.

Peter considers his answer. “Well I’d rather be dead and I can’t do that to May because that’s selfish of me. And I don’t have any privacy and we can hardly pay any bills. I don’t even know if Ned or MJ were snapped or finishing college. It’s been five years and I don’t really fit anymore. I just feel so selfish for wanting my own bedroom.”

Tony felt like an asshole. Of course Peter would be struggling with adjusting to a new world. He should of reached out sooner, though Tony wasn’t very lucid these last few months, finally weened completely off the pain medication this week.

“Can I hug you, kid?”

Peter nods, sobbing once he’s held in Tony’s arms. Tony rubs Peter’s back hoping to bring any comfort to the kid. Being alive for the last five years has been hard, trying to mourn the loss of half the world, move on from what once was, and then try and reverse everything to bring back Peter.

“Ned and MJ were both snapped as well. It was one of the first things I checked when I made it back. And I don’t know how much it helps but I literally invented time travel to bring you back, not for the greater good, but because I’m a selfish man who wanted my kid back. I know that there is no excuse for why I’ve not been there since you came back but I’m here for you now and whenever you need me in the future. I’ll put my number and Pepper’s and Happy’s and Rhodey’s number into your phone so you can call any of us whenever you need.”

Carding his fingers through Peter’s hair helped soothe Tony and he hoped it would also soothe Peter. Having a crying boy in his arms made him more like a failure than he already thought himself to be.

“I don’t have my own phone. May and I share, and we hardly ever have enough minutes. I wouldn’t deserve it anyways.”

“No, no, Kid you deserve it so much more than anyone else, and you deserve everything good. You’ll have a phone by the end of the day, with so many minutes you wouldn’t know what to do with any of it. Whatever you need, I’ll get it for you, but I need you to promise that you’ll only drink on special occasions or parties and not when your sad, or angry, or upset in anyway.”

Peter sobbed, his whole body shaking in Tony’s arms, he tries nodding, though the way that his body is shaking it made it hard to decipher, but Tony knew, he always knew.

“I don’t know why I thought things would be like normal. It didn’t really click that it’s been five years, but then it really was, and May and I don’t have anything and I went to space and died then came back to life and was thrown into a war. I can’t even sleep anymore, especially not in the dark. I don’t know why I thought things would be the same. Everyone moved on, the world moved on. There’s no room for me anymore.”

“Okay, okay, Underoo’s. It’s okay, I know it’s hard and what you’re feeling I’m sure a billion others are feeling too, and that doesn’t make you any less deserving of your feelings. We’re going to find a place for you in this new world. We’re going to help you the best we can. You’re my kid too, and I’m so sorry I haven’t been there for you, but we’ll do this together, however you want to. You get to call the shots here. You have a room here for as long as you want it and forever after that, we’ll get you and May set up wherever needed. I love you, Pete.”

For the first time in a while Peter feels like things will be okay. He’s here with Tony and the world isn’t ending, and he has a room and someone who can tell him that it’s okay. He’s not happy, but he’ll get there.

#peter parker #irondad #spiderman #spiderson #tony stark #iron man #avengers #tony and peter #tony and pepper are full on supportive parents who love their son #pepper potts #pepper stark #post endgame #endgame fixit #depressed peter parker #tired tony stark #tired dad #suicidal peter parker #may parker

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blankdblank · 3 years

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Hobbit Soulmate Pt 43

4.28 million, check in hand Richard was on his way to the bank and certain of what to do the cash was split, deposited with the rest used to pay off the remainder of the funds owed on the new home. A small portion and mostly repaid soon enough by the funds wired to his account from the couple who bought his old home. All those memories of Tiffany and years alone struggling between parts now replaced by hope imbued into the walls of the new home that you would build a family inside of. No matter how the year was split between your homes and trips to the ranch he knew your children would not want for any affections or adoration and soon have a cousin to one day play with.

He had to be careful though as daydreams would often lead to his smiling return from work already hearing echoes of the future babies rushing to greet him while you hummed making some intriguing mixture for the meal you and your youngest still propped on your hip we’re whipping up one handed for him. Daydreams were always bittersweet but precious all the same while he felt lighter than he had in decades. He wanted to be there for your show, knowing how hard Chicago had been on you, yet thankfully before Kong this was just a single show that he would be able to purchase a copy of to keep and watch at his leisure, one day with those same one day to not be imaginary babies.

They would beam with pride seeing how he adored you and the success and strength you had in just your little finger using your resolute love as their example. So very much how he saw his own parents, a love he’d never dreamed capable of possessing and passing down to his babies. You would get there, if not for the patience of the ficklest of mistresses, time. For now he had his dreams of you, one in particular of the first night you would share in his bed inside your new bedroom. One he’d share with only you upon your arrival. Not even a diary he’d entrust with the sweetest of murmurs he’d trace through your hair while you slept. Secured by the gentlest of kisses to your cheek and temple until they were broken by that beloved groggy smirk and turn over to foil the last half of his ocean of endearments and proclamations of his undying love he’d yet to bestow upon you.

Sharp and loud a shriek had left your lips and behind the door you’d just closed the delivery man turned around and knocked on your door again, “You okay Miss?”

Opening the door you smiled hastily replying, “Yes, sorry. News from work.”

“You’re not laid off are you?” He asked on a pained tone.

“No, paycheck I’ve been waiting on.”

“Oh that’s a relief,” he sighed out, “Been the bearer of bad news all week.” Retreating again to head back down to his waiting car.

Your neighbor opened the door poking his head out with spoon in mouth from his bowl of cereal making you say, “Sorry, paycheck.”

With his mouth half full he replied, “Oh that’s good, got a child support summons last week myself. Don’t know who Charles A. Sullivan is but he owes 67 grand in back child support.” Inside he went to your chuckle filled mutual retreat back to your apartments.

From his own doorway your dad leaned out smirking as you anxiously smiled waving the pages, “Got paid,”

Out he stepped to accept the papers he knew you were going to try to give him and his eyes flinched wider seeing the figure on the page. “This says 4.28, million, dollars.” His eyes flinched up to yours again, “This is from Bard?”

You nodded, “That’s my cut of the box office. Yours is behind mine.”

He turned the page and exhaled having to sit on the stool behind him eyeing the $3 million check he’d gotten from his smaller albeit hefty percentage as one of the main stars of the film not expected to do much as far as earnings went. “I have, I can’t have this much money, I had, what, five lines.”

You shrugged saying, “They didn’t expect much or we might not have gotten that much. Now you can retire,” you squeaked out anxiously still trying to remain calm leaning back against the wall across from him half in the kitchen you’d been prepping breakfast before the fated knock.

Curtly he chortled and rumbled back, “Damn right I could.” Long and slow he let out a breath saying, “I certainly could.” Quietly you got back to making the meal that you shared and then made another trip to the bank. The same tellers were much happier to see you both again, a moment the manager there was a bit taken aback by the amount on the checks from the same film company from before. A fact that stirred up a conversation between them in your leaving on how actors might actually get paid after you’d shared most of your roles didn’t pay till they were out of theaters and it could be a huge gap between filming and its release. All of which making them a bit more grateful for their stable paychecks and slightly dull jobs to being big movie stars.

It was beyond odd to be heading back to ballet rehearsals. With hair wound back in a braided curl happy bun at the loss of half of your bobby pins somehow and in a halter style leotard underneath knee length sweats you pulled a flannel and your leather jacket on over it shouldering your bag to head out for your unusual trip to the elite ballet company. Mingled through the crowds quite easily the trip was managed and all the way up to and inside the front doors you held your cool facade. But once those doors shut the aloof grin on your face stiffened to a stoic expression under the weight of the many staring eyes in the building of Grecian statues of men and waifs galore with feet stuck awkwardly out like geese in between. All whom watched your tiny out of place self strolling right through the gaps between their groups to follow the directions your Professor had given you.

From the lift however the mood didn’t change. And right at home you found your way into the designated room strolling right to the wall of cubbies. There jacket, flannel and converse were folded inside with socks next rolled up containing your subtly removed engagement ring that you shoved inside your bag’s hidden inner pocket you’d added yourself for all your expensive things in case someone got nosy while you worked. Your new ballet slippers were pulled out and once the bag was added to the stack in the cubby to the bars you went to pretend you had to already been warming up at home to keep your mind distracted until the others arrived.

They certainly weren’t yelling. But when the crowds did start to arrive the Director commented and watched while you chatted with five of your former dance classmates from Julliard and one from Oxford. Back at the bars to fill the main ballet cast around the mainly vocal and acting supporting cast members in the sea of silently stretching and gossiping extras waiting to hear their first assigned steps for the opening number. You could all hear one say, “I can’t believe she permed her hair before coming here. I’m gonna make that girl sweat out those curls.”

The bile in their voice caught by more than just you and turned more than half of the heads in the room of dancers, mainly those of the dancers of color, who took up at least half of the cast with similar curly hair or even tighter curls than yours, to see which Director to avoid speaking to unless necessary. Behind him however Mr Tarl strolled past him saying, “Good luck with that those are her natural curls dickhead.”

Into the room he came while the Director scoffed and said he’d be back later leaving his partner that was wide eyed catching all the cast glaring at the leaving man’s back. “Alrighty, I see we’re all here so let’s get right into it.” He said and waved you forward, “Ariel and Flounder.” Nodding in your pop up onto your feet across the room you hurried to the young teen’s side to hear your intro while those playing your on stage relatives and Sebastian gathered next to hear theirs mingled with the majority of extras. The male cast around Prince Eric on the ship would open the show, however markers for the transition had to be gives first before you were moved aside to watch them and wait, you would blend in on the background and then fade out of the floor to the side to wait again. Ariel’s sisters and Sebastian would come next before you would come again with Flounder and Scuttle.

While some might have worried you got the least attention it was clearly shown to not be needed as you took right away to what he seemed to want going through the day with little alterations from the first try of the steps. Something the pair of Directors were floored by and took notice of your classmates that seemed to have a knack for that as well having been so used to his style of teaching. For waves most of the ballet would be those leaping with ribbons with ebbs and flows in deep sways and off kilter moves added by the ship crew who would rock to the imagined shift of the fake boat they were on between leaps from mark to mark for their roles in ship tasks. A tape playing of the music helped to give hints to the songs you had all been given copies of days prior gave a simple idea of the flow of the show you were not singing just yet to rest your voices until the vocal rehearsals.

It wasn’t that hard of a set of steps. Even to the tap dancing number you had with the seagulls after being turned human. However the struggle came from what restrictions the costumes would give at having to do a lot of upper body movements and smooth arches with your joined legs in the ample lifts and team work steps around later what would include sections that you would be suspended by long blue ribbons of cloth to get the proper effects. Every other day the dance rehearsals would have you in vocal rehearsals while the extras would have theirs today and every day between yours.

One week bled into two and with the newer musical version of the film meant for Broadway the show took on a new life and proved to be easier than first described to you. The most free beginning with the transformation scene when your tail would be removed and the dancers circling you with colored cloths for the magic spell. They would give cover for the hand off of a sort of toga dress Sebastian would help tie the back up for you to hide the leotard the loose wrinkled fabric would be stitched to that would be eased over your mostly sheer top leotard with fake shells to cover your breasts that secured around the neck. They would carry off your tail skirt in their prance away leaving you in the faked moment of struggle to gain control of your new legs. Trailed by two steps and a collapse to be hoisted up by Flounder and Sebastian to get you onto the staircase to be brought in later acting as the path to the surface of the water.

Nights found you soaking your feet and eating what you could before early trips to bed to get some sleep to be ready for the cameras that the documentary team hired to film this could easily pick up on any hint of troubles you were having.

This wasn’t the first time your grandparents would have come to New York but this was big. You had paid 1.25 million into your house and had the other quarter left to drop when you were done with your apartment and around the breakfast table on the Saturday before the big show you had to mentally work out the times today all your appliances were coming you’d picked out three days prior. Washer, dryer and several fridges were coming and while you continued to paint the final upper floor walls their base color down to Lee’s walls he’d bought the shades he wanted leaving the cans inside the basement until you got through the rest of the house to help him paint there liking your skills at house painting.

All tasks helping to distract you from the tabloid fodder. You were the main topic, how well or terribly you were supposedly doing with assumed weight fluctuations from a so called terrible diet as if you weren’t taking full care to remain well fed and weren’t restricting yourself so for the normal body type for the stage. Someone else might have snapped and turned their heads in the store to read those titles alone but you never did ignoring any and everything except for an adorable magazine on puppies to help your dad pick a breed for the dog he’d wanted to get options on. Money always came next and with it came the topic of how much you were making the show was quick to shut down saying that everyone was volunteering their time for free and that was where it shifted for the start of the second week.

Drastically headlines seemed to shift to that news that broke while you were snapped in pictures through your open uncovered windows carrying more supplies up the stairs to head to the third floor where while the top floor walls dried you wanted to get started on the murals on the walls of the nursery. Patches of sorts like off a quilt to be lined with frames of stars and compasses and tiny treasure pathways and x’s were signature scenes from the children’s story to be painted in later while your dad and Lee got started painting his basement until the break for lunch when you would join them again.

Lunch was brought by the Landlord who smiled taking a tour seeing how it was all tying together, and gladly taking the task of guiding the delivery men down to the basement to install one fridge, stove, dishwasher and the washer and dryer so you could eat. Fridge oven and dishwasher were next for the main floor with two fridges and ovens heading up to the higher floors stirring curiosity to the cameramen below as to how many kitchens you were planning on having. All of this attention however seemed to only attract more as by Tuesday you had offers from several house renovation centered magazines requesting the first tour of the place when you had completed it.

“Thank you so much,” you said handing over the clipboard with sighed delivery sheet once all was installed properly from the now empty truck.

“Hell of a place you got here Miss Pear. Been a real pleasure to get a peek inside.”

Making you smirk at the head guys’s turn to join his crew back inside the truck to head back to the shop. “Thank you.”

Lee behind you smirked asking, “So, appliances, utilities and half of our stuff, um, what were we waiting on to move in again?”

To which your dad added, “Cable’s installed tomorrow along with the internet and home phone.”

Lee, “Plus cable tomorrow.”

Rolling your eyes you turned around saying, “Just hire the truck and crew to help move.”

“Yes!” Lee said turning to high five your widely smiling dad on the way back inside to get painting his apartment again.

“Guess you can buy that big screen too dad.” You said as the doors shut behind you.

“Already did, arriving tomorrow. Along with yours and Lee’s.” Earning a squeaking hug from the lanky body crashing into him out of excitement while you giggled at his proud smile for holding back more surprise gifts he’d planned weeks prior. Saving his hug for later when you could head to bed again dozing off next to him while he watched the shows playing on your staticky rabbit ear using tv for a sort of going away party for this place you never even got the chance to choose to move into in the first place.

Lost to thoughts on why should you really get the chance to pick when you wanted to move out you turned around to head inside. One more day of packing and hoisting everything up and down more flights of steps and that would be it. You could turn in the keys and pay off the brownstone to keep your word and Rich could mail his copy of the keys later. Very soon you’d have to go to sleep in a still halfway done home of your own and all you selfishly wanted was Richard to be done fake loving other women in England to be here and hoist you up in his arms for an oh so stereotypical picture of his carrying you over the threshold.

You supposed that could wait for the England home, this would just be yours for now and you could tolerate how badly you wanted to cry at the weight of it all while the duo moving in with you were oh so happy for this new beginning. Two huge checks and this tiny break once this show was over could be used to mull over whatever this slump would turn out to be to ready for that freeing sight of New Zealand that brought with it a whole new weight, another blockbuster smasher of a film with your face in the front of the poster right next to a giant ape.

You could do this, you kept repeating it over and over all while it felt like swallowing glass and coughing it up again into the shapes of chains of flowers at how somehow you still felt helpless and alone. You found out soon enough these thoughts were just a mental warning flag from your body something was coming as your stomach seemed to clench all of a sudden and you were off to the adorable guest bath under the stairs to hurl up everything you ate. Fever followed within moments and your dad was tucking you up in his arms to start the end of your night inside the ER. The Landlord took on the task of locking up swearing he’d take charge of helping Lee finish up his floor while you were being taken care of.

Your dad couldn’t care less about the show, merely wanting you to be better again, holding strong to ensure you weren’t going to be looked over and sent home without an answer. It was just a fever and nausea to them at first glance but something about this stirred up memories of his losing your mom like every time you had a fever before.

It wasn’t your appendix and you weren’t dehydrated and once laid flat didn’t feel the urge to throw up anymore. A blood pregnancy test came back negative in the time they waited for a body scan that showed you had an ovarian cyst that burst. You knew it was there, the lone little parasite now spontaneously exploded in its own little reaction to your internal turmoil no doubt as all you’d done was sign a clipboard and try to walk back to your basement apartment. Just in case ectopic pregnancy was ruled out.

And to the cameras outside you came walking out a few hours later just in time to get a warm hug from Lee while sharing what happened and how you were fine, if not a tad bit sore and amply tired and ready for bed. Once the house was all locked up again back to the apartment you walked where your dad to carry you up to yours seeing your energy had dwindled again fully at ease with making supper then curling around you all night. And on into the morning for a decided easy day of you gently helping Lee to finish painting while your dad handled the crew of delivery guys and the second that installed the cable throughout the house to the four floors set for it that mingled with their apparent friends from the internet and phone crew.

There would be a mounted phone in the kitchen with a voicemail attachment to go with two table top phones for your dad’s and in your private living room as your bedroom didn’t have the right outlet for it and Richard’s study would be his sanctuary and the ring might bother his thought process. To go with that the second outlet there would be used for where your laptop could sit that your dad could help to move your desk from your bedroom later. Each phone now with the number written on a slip under the clear slot under the receiver for the speed dial card mainly empty you could add to later.

The sick day, for your relief, pushed back the move day to have you at your peak past the show date. The next night to be exact, which Lee was readying for by boxing his stuff up already and focusing on small trips to the shop to pick out some spare small essentials he might want to decorate his new place he went ahead and left there using his key he smiled brightly every time he used it. Richard along with friends and family who called were calmed down leaving the latter to hope that this lost cyst might ease your monthly troubles in the future since its arrival and lone decision to make said monthly cycles dreadful for you.

Sunday passed however and Monday came again, to everyone once again staring all the way up to where you found Mr Tarl and Mr Combs who both asked, “Are you alright?”

“Ya, ovarian cyst burst. Doctor cleared me. I’ve stretched and danced a bit over yesterday doesn’t hurt till I try to get into a handstand for a cartwheel other than that I’m good.”

Mr Combs chuckled at your try to make them relax and said, “Just let us know if you need a break at any time.”

“Thank you.”

Over to your friends once you’d filled your cubby you walked saying, “Oh stop, had to drop in for my yearly hoof and horns maintenance.” Luring chuckles and grins from those around you who in school knew of a nickname from an instructor who called you a goat in your first week assuming limits on your skills who you proved wrong right away. “All good and polished now for the big show.”

“Did I push too hard on moving into the new place?” Lee asked you on your way up from just getting back again after the practice.

Turning your head you spotted him by the mailboxes answering, “Are you, is this about my cyst?”

“I’ve been pushing too hard. We’ve been painting non stop, appliance hunting in those warehouses and you’re trying to do the show and your grandparents are coming soon.”

“Lee,” you giggled out, “You didn’t make my cyst burst as much as I’ve been behind your appendix throwing its own tantrum.”

That had his grin easing out, “You’re sure this isn’t too fast?” he asked walking with you up the steps, “I mean you moved here on your own now I feel like I’m nudging you out of your bigger place.”

“I didn’t move in here.” You said making him pause and you looked up at him, “You remember? I went to Oxford and when I got back my things were moved into the bigger place that Mrs Henderson was moved out of. I want to move, it’s a fantastic place, but I wanted to be a bit selfish for at least a couple days with my daydreams.”

“Daydreams on what?”

“Call me selfish but I wanted to buy it and fix it up with Rich here too and to have him here for that first night in, but he won’t even see the place until October at the latest. Even my grandparents are going to see it before he does. I want to move in, it just, feels a bit, big. It’s a freaking house, five floors and I don’t even have a vacuum.”

That had him chuckle and move in to claim a calming hug from you, murmuring in a press of his cheek onto the top of your head, “We’ll go vacuum shopping tomorrow if you like.”

“I don’t even know what to look for in a vacuum.”

Pulling back he said resting his arm across your back, “Come on, let’s go see if your dad can answer that question. And if it makes you feel better you can carry me over the threshold.” That had you giggle through his own chuckle.

First fittings were today post dance practice before your vocal practice. Again just the dance had you close to wiped out and once the fitting was over at the vocal training you took up the offer of one of the wheeled stools to rest up some from the lingering discomfort you were feeling. Truly it wasn’t very painful compared to the exhausting rehearsals that now on top of this was tearing the wind from your sails but growing more tolerable with the end goal in sight. Added to the supplies a vacuum was brought to your new place and cross legged on the couch from Canada in your living room you sat having assembled said appliance watching the show your dad switched on for you seeing how tired you were.

There was just a little bit of work to be done to Lee’s apartment they assured you they could handle while you rested, both knowing you’d most likely nod off under the blanket he had laid across it after it was moved in. And sure enough when they broke for a meal they found you stretched out underneath that blanket lost in a deep much needed nap. And gently the hand smoothing over your back woke you helped you to be draped around your dad’s back for the walk to your apartment where the dinner in the crock pot was waiting for the three of you. Lee had seen you tired and nodding off before but this was something different and slowly he began to see just how rough this health speed bump had slammed you into the ground. At least you were bouncing back, that gave him some form of comfort while he watched you slip back to your usual self just in time for the big day.

Wednesday was the first try on the actual stage and Thursday Lee and your dad both stole two of the seats in the crowd of relatives of the other cast mates to see what you had pulled together in such a short time. The pair again awed by another impressive show you had chosen to be a part of. The same seats that the following day they both smiled seeing your Grandparents coming to join them once spotted with creeping grins at the intriguing take on the popular tale. Like always their presence was not missed. Proved by more than one dancer among the extras who perked up hoping to make a good impression all through to the end of the work day when you smiled.

An adjustment of a twist was given to your engagement ring that was freshly added again on your way from the locker room that enabled you to change from your leotard and sweats to a t shirt and shorts spotting your grandparents waiting there for you.

“Babushka, Babu.”

The pair of them both gave you tight hugs and your grandpa said gladly in Russian, “We missed you, precious Bubble.”

She asked, “How are you feeling?”

“Much better now, back to myself again.”

She asked, “And there were no more cysts?”

“No, just the one and I have an appointment when I get back from New Zealand to get scanned again to see if another grows or if it was just a one off.”

Your Grandpa asked, “Time to feed you.”

That had you smile and say, “I thought I might show you something first if you’re up for it.”

Your Grandma answered, “As long as we can take you to eat afterwards have to get your strength back up.”

Your dad smiled saying, “We could always order something when we get there.”

Grandpa looked between you asking in your turn to lad the way out, “There is food there?”

“Oh I think you’ll love it when you see it.” His question died however to his creeping grin at your arm looping under his and all the way from climbing into the car their driver opened for you to the address it pulled up on you could see their minds working to find out where you were taking them. The pair spoke to your dad while Lee listened to a message from one of the actors in his own play whose call he’d missed. The stop outside the brownstone however had them utterly baffled in the slide out of the car to join you on the curb. Your words however seemed to make it click for them, “I told you about that place I was looking at?”

That turned their heads and her lips parted taking in the whole building you gestured to, “This is the place?”

You nodded and asked, “Wanna see?” Their heads nodded and you giggled turning to show them inside. Once again your dad explained the outer gate on the stoop they approved of for spare security to the mudroom you left your bag inside of on the built in bench along the wall granting them a moment to prepare before you opened the front door and the full tour really began.

From the reading hideaway that turned out to be a bit awkward looking until you’d unpacked your books you’d bought in Canada filling a shelf at least gave a hint to one day being loaded with books that even they could adore the idea of for you. The half covered windows they mainly loved as, just like in your tour, still cast the place in a gorgeous glow, passing the steps to the living room you pointed to your chandelier saying, “Liv Tyler gifted me this chandelier, the old tenant hung stuff on his and it left this huge crater in the floor when it fell. And this place has these great beam arches and some of them are used for these half walls,” you said leading them into the living room where they admired everything from the carpet to the intricate fireplace their fingertips stroked along on their way to admire the milky glass you had talked about.

Grandpa, “Interesting furniture arrangement.” Taking notice of the couch still in the center of the room with the tv out a good distance from the wall as well.

Grandma, “And, is this eggshell for the walls?”

“Oh, that’s just the primer coat,” earning nods from them. “We’ve only painted the basement the colors Lee wanted yet, everywhere else had patchy drywall and needed the basecoat before we could paint whatever color we eventually decide on. I was thinking an indigo or navy for here, then go lighter on the way back.”

Grandpa, “That would be lovely.”

“Yes, we just have our things from Canada here so far, the rest is gonna be moved day after tomorrow, got a crew helping us and everything with the truck. It looks so much better in here with the new flooring in. Had huge gouges and welts in the floor where he’d smashed holes in the tiles and walls had been torn out, but I think I picked well on tiles and such and Rich loved the idea for the carpet shade.”

Onwards into the dining room you led them exciting them even more as your dad said, “Used to be two small rooms here we tore the walls out of to make this space bigger, adds another guest bath down here, and the kitchen was just laughable. Had to be ten by ten, if that with no dining room.”

“They tore the cabinets out and smashed the countertops too, but I got them to build me this really cool island, and there’s the bathroom tucked back here,” you said with a smile. Leading them from the bath hidden partly by the ends of the built ins and the half wall for a puzzling empty space now explained as a mini hall. From the cute bathroom they admired the silver and blue color scheme they followed you to the spacious pantry through the door in the middle of the built ins and out again to get a better look at the kitchen. “Brand new tile counters, good for heat and easy scrubbing, plus easy to repair if one does ever break.”

Grandma, “Very beautiful. Counter damage can be a nightmare.”

Your Grandpa led the way to the newly tiled sunroom, “You have a yard?”

“Little one, bout 30, 40 feet by 25.” you said in the way out onto the patio for a less than awe striking scrap of green spreading through the upturned tiled courtyard. “Haven’t decided on how to work the yard yet, but we were thinking of pulling back the tile for more grass space when we do have the courtyard redone.”

Grandpa, “You could have a nice garden here, and that is a nice tree, rather small.”

Your dad said, “I don’t think it’s very old, but it should grow over time. L said it flowers in the spring, so should be pretty, nice purple-ish ones.” Joining them on the walk back in where she led the way to the hall to the basement making Lee grin and follow along to give the tour of his impressive apartment he’d be renting before their trip back up to see more.

The bath under the stairs had them smiling for what hint of a theme you might be trying to match up to it for the rest of the place and up you went. A bed frame and mattress had been set up for your dad’s room you’d painted his decided color so he wouldn’t have to move the bed again and from the office to the guest room. There they paused to inspect the beds you had designed. Four Queen sized beds with one simple tug revealing in sliding drawers under the bottom one two spare twin sized slots for two more guests if need be surrounded by two rows of cubbies and shelves to fill the gaps to the ends of the walls had your grandfather asking, “Did you have these specially built? Or did they come with the house?”

“I designed them, actually.” You said in a hint of a bashful tone to their creeping smiles at seeing a glimmer of that engineering degree of yours coming to some use in all this construction making them wonder which other pieces you had come up with reminding them of your ingenious island downstairs they had admired for all its features. Along with several tiny features un-thought of to increase storage space where little more could be squeezed out.

Grandmother, “Impressive. This design could put many double beds sold now to shame.”

Your dad said leading the way out of the room, “Got another set upstairs. Wanted to get them in while the flooring and shelf units were going in to not piss off the neighbors more than necessary. Whole crew was amazed by her design and how precise her measurements came down to a simple photo copy onto a blueprint for the build.”

And onto the living space they had to admire how much space you were granting your father. An action they took as one of great respect for him almost drawing tears to their eyes. They knew how much you loved him and in this western culture that seemed at times to abandon their elders you shown a blatant disregard for that norm and even had granted your best friend a safe home as well in your free space too.

Up again they went to the more bland floor with just the interesting layout and curved wall shapes. “The second set of beds is in here.” Up until they reached the book nook that you led them past almost making them sigh at having to see another guest room. “And this one was clearly my favorite and gave me the best idea when I first saw it.”

Straight through the bathroom and into the closet you walked exiting the open sliding doors for their jaw dropping view of the framed sketch coated walls above the few built in shelves and benches under the wall near the window and the chandelier above a few rolled up rugs and a toy chest you’d found in a second hand shop. Your Grandma asked, “This looks like a children’s room, is it?” Looking straight at you now.

“We are planning ahead, no babies yet, obviously, but we did agree it’d be best to at least know where we wanted to put them when they do come. All reminding them of the wishes of their daughter on a pirate themed nursery of her own one day. “Mom had some Peter Pan sketches for me, so I have these mural sketches I’m gonna fill in in a few days and I was thinking a silvery blue for the walls. And I found this really cool pirate ship chandelier.”

The pair simply hugged you widening your grin in their silent moment of utter glee knowing babies had been planned for and they would one day see their great grandbabies both in person and pictured inside this nursery. “It is beautiful,” they said releasing you again before asking, “Where will you sleep?”

“Top floor.” Continuing the tour to the stairs for another stunning open floor plan. All the open spaces were looked at with a pause in the study you said, “I thought Rich might like this, so he can keep his work research here and have his own deflating spot after roles to pace or do whatever in to get into a character.”

Grandma looked at you, “He is very serious then in his craft.”

“Yes,” you said with a smile, “He might have to play death destined whores often for tv bits right now but one day he’ll get a role he can really sink his teeth into. He’s much more intense on stage. Ooh, like North and South when it comes out, he played it so well. I think next spring, ish, it’ll be out on BBC. I’ll warn you.”

Onto the bedroom and master suite and closet you showed them deepening their smiles spotting the boxes on the seemingly new mattress there beside the bed frame kit yet to be put together. Both taking in the odd wave to one wall on the other side of the staircase that limited where you could put your bed. “This wall is kind of odd but I think maybe a chair or something could go here, for night reading or something. And I was thinking maybe plum and grey for in here. Rich likes that scheme from my apartment now.”

“And you are moving in fully after the show, how much is this house?”

“1.5 million,” gaining a plotting nod from the pair on means of shifting funds your way if necessary.

She asked, “This seems large. We have looked at realtor listings here before. Is this large for this part of town?”

You nodded, “25 by 60 feet. 1500 roughly a floor for 7500. Huge compared to what I’d have ever dreamed to land. But L and Dad have been plotting a while. Which is good most spots on this block are closer to 3 million or even higher but it was so trashed we got a good deal, put one and a quarter into it so far not counting renovations, and have agreed to pay off the final quarter when I turn over the apartment.”

“I’m so proud of you,” she said instantly deepening your anxious grin to a pleased one, “This is an incredible home to begin in. Richard approves?”

“Yes, he’s only seen it in pictures but he helped to pick the first try for colors while he came to stay in Canada when I went back. So we’ve sort of worked on it together. I also have pictures of the new place he got in England, his brother moved and he wanted to be closer to his parents and since I graduated I don’t need to be so close to Oxford. I could just take the train if need be. He even picked a kids room there we said we could mirror the one here to sort of give them a sense of familiarity for when we bound around until we settle.”

Grandpa, “Great plan. Always useful to have an anchor for babies.”

“So where did you want to eat?” You asked and they smiled all the way back to the stairs where your grandmother paused eyeing the door on the side of the half walls around the stairs topped with milky glass panes. She eased it open and you said, “We have those at the ranch in Texas, barn door to keep kids off the stairs.”

That parted her lips as you showed her that it closed with a knob up top locking the door into the walls for a secure guard against baby tumbles. Your Gramps said, “I did not even notice this.”

“Five floors wanted to make sure we get these in with the other builds so they wouldn’t go forgotten. Plus the plastic ones they sell can give out, these are in the walls and mounted on the rails top and bottom.”

She eased the door back open again flat against the wall and walked with you now sharing second glances at each flight noticing the secure doors that doubled the safety of the unborn grandbabies you would be raising at least partly here. All the way down to the car feeling so much more at ease over what sort of home you might have chosen to claim for yourself out here and what that meant for your future.

They had chosen a hotel to stay in and while you savored your last night in your tiny bubble the inevitable morning crept closer and groggily you woke and readied yourself for the day. Though this time with fiery red hair that after a trip back to the salon the Queens had helped you with some fiery red hair dye that would wash out over the next few weeks in time for your trip back to bleach yourself blonde. Heading out in exactly the shorts and shirt your hand first fell onto once you’d eaten to start the final fitting and makeup process for the set pictures with the cast. Again your hair was straightened out by the amazed makeup crew that was glad to not have to use the assumed twelve cans of temporary hair dye that now could be scattered throughout the cast of extras that were eating up more than expected. Just a few extensions were added by means of a few stitches into the braids they were woven into around the bottom half of the back of your head that in case your curls did come out again the length wouldn’t be too noticeably changed. It was another bold look for yourself taking the others aback each time they spotted you adding this to your portfolio of identities you had assumed.

A speech was eventually given and soon enough from a place readied behind the lowered curtain for the first scene to your cast bows the spectacle was through and you could now wade through the night of flashes and press that had come to speak to each of the dancers to fill in the picture to flood the papers with. It was a stunning haul for the charity and partly in thanks to the deep pocket names yours had brought in. Losing you from the roster lured some investors from London. All who had personally flown here to add to the donation tin to spite the company that spurned you with promises to return praising your performance to build up more steam in the disc sales when they were available.

All in all you were glad to have taken the role for charity and once the extensions were removed, you’d washed the hairspray out of your hair and sat comfortably in your boxed up apartment a grin slid across your face in the mental goodbye to your trusty apartment that had seen so much of your dramatic little blip here.

One more night was taken on your old soon to be guest bed until the bright and early joint hour long unloading process of taking all you’d managed to get up to your place down to the truck to join Lee’s scattered boxes and desk he had. The guys locked up the truck and with a tight hug to your former landlord and new neighbor the keys were traded along with the final check and he chuckled letting you be on your way to the brownstone you beat the truck to.

Obviously used to the hefting of furniture up and down stairs the crew mentally planned each piece out and while you guided the furniture up to where it was going while holding boxes of your own your dad and Lee both handled the rest of the boxes. Word soon got around and the moving van had curious people peering in the open truck with a bit of disappointment not seeing anything fancier than some old furniture and boxes to go with the new appliances and tv’s you’d been photographed in accepting the delivery of. Yet the truck was soon emptied and the pleased team handed out handshakes accepting the cash you paid with. Pleased you had helped to streamline the process with a plan of your own making this one of the simplest moves they had done in this area with others they recounted for each other on the stroll back to the truck now locked up again. Moving the boxes though was half the battle, leaving the curb inside you went and got to unpacking.

First in your kitchen you unpacked your supply of dishes from the apartment having already put your supply from Canada in the kitchen on your floor, leaving your bedroom for later knowing you’d no doubt cry when you got there. Everything was in the middle of the rooms easing things even more for the crew who were told you would be painting more to explain it. But all your dishes and appliances you assigned new homes to joined the food in bags you unloaded into the fridge and pantry. Away from the table you moved the chairs extending the middle portion of it to scoot the chairs back readying the place for guests in the future.

The soaps and cleaning supplies you had were next, with the bottle of detergent taken down by Lee to the laundry room on his way to unpack his things while your dad was already on his way up to his own floor. Hefty and left in the middle of the reading room now housing your armchair from your apartment the boxes of books were next. With each empty box forming a pile you’d move to the garage for use later and in a make shift system more of the shelves were filled and the sight warmed your heart at their having a home now not just lying on the floor like before.

Up to Richard’s study you went, passing each guest bath you had decorated with small touches to make them usable to guests in the future, to unload the box of books and journals he’d left in New York either by design or chance and then gave in and went to your room. Along with your violin case the boxes from your closet along with the two bags you now traveled with were unloaded with the few shirts Richard had left with you, each you gave a quick hug to and settled on the shoe cubby and underwear drawer comprised island in the center of the room to be cuddled up in later. Stealing a once over in your way out all your things around the bed including your aquarium lamp you’d have to find the right home for later on.

Shaking off the vast space for just you down the steps again you went to pull together the first lunch in the place that would kick off the next round of painting. Again once you’d rinsed the dishes now added to the washer the windows were opened as the navy paint was opened and on the tarped living room floor brushes were grabbed to begin the final touches to this floor. Room by room the colors wanted were added breathing life into the place. Subtle shades of crème were used in the undecided space to not have white walls that just the base coat alone stood out too boldly against the navy you’d chosen that was matched by a single strip of bare wall inside your reading hideaway to go with the brilliant cherry wood shelving.

Dinner broke the painting and while the floor aired out you ate watching a film on your dad’s floor planning the next steps for the following day for him and you while Lee had some plans with a friend coming back to town.

“So when is trash day again?”

“Wednesday,” your dad answered. “The bins are in the garage, they pick up on that middle street.”

“I will remember that.” You said wetting your lips to add, “Ok before we get settled for night one, let’s have an honor code for toilet paper in the guest toilets.”

Lee, “Why are you looking at me?”

“You’re across from me, anyways I have the smallest bladder but if we see it’s running low in the guest baths we get a new roll for it even if we have to buy a new pack for the pantry.”

Lee nods, “I’m good with that. Speaking of bladder,” he said popping up to use your dad’s bathroom after a consenting point and nod exchange between him and your dad.

Once alone your dad smirks humming out, “I give him a week before he’s stealing toilet paper and towels from the guest bathrooms.”

You smirked replying, “Oh now, he’s got his show he’s rehearsing for, clearly he’ll be using theirs too. I give him two.”

“Might as well buy twelve packs for each bathroom with the rest of the supplies.” Making the both of you chuckle to yourselves finishing your meal with Lee once he’d returned. Once the food was gone your floor was tackled.

With your room a lovely plum color on two of the walls and the wall leading to the bathroom around the fireplace and the wavy wall were painted a lovely dark grey that while wet almost looked black but dried in a softer tone. The grey already was in your closet that proved as a test of the shockingly dark shade you were glad to duplicate in the bedroom. Midnight blue was used between the built ins for Richard’s study to make the wood pop as the accents that along with the light from the window helped to keep it from seeming too dark for him to be able to feel comfortable to work there. Dark teal was your alternative shade that from the mint accents in your kitchen colored your living room to finish off the colorful floor that with the left over white walls on the walls outside your bedroom and the study painted crème to help separate the different areas.

Pt 44

#Richard Armitage x Reader OC #Lee Pace x Reader OC #Moving In #Tour of Grandparents #The Little Mermaid Musical Ballet Charity Show #Rehearsals #Filming #Hospital Trip #Medical Issue #Recovery #Work Through The Pain #Grandparents Visit #Home Improvements Shown Off #Painting

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totaldramafan-lauri · 3 years

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Eurovision 2021 Opinions, Predictions, and Rankings

DONE.

I really cut it close this time, but I got a couple days to relax until the contest! >.<

God, I missed Eurovision so much that I think I rambled a bit too hard....XD So, if you don’t have the patience to read all of this, I don’t blame you! I mainly just make these for fun, heh....But if you do read this, PLEASE be warned that I have some very unpopular opinions this year. It’s not as bad as some other years, but there’s a few things in here that will probably confuse people. I’m not trying to piss anyone off, I’m just sharing what I think of the songs and that’s all. I can’t even vote, so.....yeah!

Also, uh....be warned for excessive gushing, because I like the VAST majority of songs this year. There are only two that I’m indifferent to, and none that I outright dislike. And even the two songs I’m indifferent to, I managed to say some good things about, so I don’t outright bash any of the songs! I’m not a critic, I’m just a big Eurovision fan being happy talking about Eurovision.

Ummmm, anything else, hmmmm.....well, the rehearsals have been done, but I don’t watch those cuz I like going in blind. I like being surprised. So, I have no idea how any of the songs will be staged, keep that in mind.

Now, I think I said everything! Into the rambling!

(In alphabetical order by country)

Song: Karma Country: Albania Thoughts: We start our list off with a song that...I wish I liked more! This song is pretty good - I like the music (though the instrumental breaks are pretty busy, with a lot of noise at once) and the vocals are excellent, but...it's a pretty standard Albanian entry in that it lacks that extra wow factor for me. In fact, when I say "standard", I mean that when I haven't heard it in a few days and I try to get in into my head, I'll sometimes confuse it with "Ktheju tokës" (their 2019 entry). And I know that isn't fair to it, but the fact that I can't make it stick in my mind really says a lot to how little of an impact it made on me in the long run. "Ktheju tokës" WAS good, and this song is good, but man do Albania really have trouble standing out in this contest (with the one HUGE exception, of course <3) Prediction: I don't think this will qualify for the final, but I wouldn't be surprised if I was proven wrong. Albania have surprised me multiple times in recent years. I kinda don't wanna be surprised this time, since it could be at the cost of a song I like more (and yeah, it probably will be), but I still wouldn't rule it out. This song does have a chance. But for now, I'll say no, it won't qualify.

Song: Technicolour Country: Australia Thoughts: Time to take off your clothes- wait, that's not it? It's "cloaks"? OK then, if you say so...Not only is this a very cool and unique song, but it's also pretty catchy! It's kinda hard to put into words how I feel about this song. When I first heard it, I liked it OK but I also feared that it would grate on me after a bit, but thankfully, it didn't! In fact, this song grew on me, just the opposite of what I thought. I enjoy this song quite a bit now! The singer's voice is really good. She has impressive range. And there's nothing else this year that sounds like this. So, while I don't love it, I definitely like and respect it! It's an impressive entry from Australia, and I'm sad that they have to preform remotely. I hope that doesn't hurt them too much... Prediction: Oh, I wanna say they'll qualify so bad, cuz they deserve to! And even when their entries don't get love from the televote, they still get carried to the final by the juries, so....I think they might! C'mon, it's a good song and it deserves to do well! I don't even love it that much and I can still see the talent and appeal of this song, so yeah, I'm gonna say it'll qualify! The betters are underselling this! Might not do that well in the final, but eh, at least it'll be there.

Song: Amen Country: Austria Thoughts: And here we come to one of the weirder things this year: like 2015, there are two songs with the same name, leading to some confusion. I'll get to Slovenia's "Amen" way later, but for now all I'll say is that that's the one I think about more BY FAR. To the point where poor Austria here gets completely overshadowed by it. XD And that's really unfortunate, because this song is pretty good! It's very emotional, even moreso when you read that it's based on the deaths of the singer's daughter and aunt. It definitely hit me harder after I realized that it wasn't just a breakup song...and actually about death...The lyrics are also very good, especially the repeating of "Tell me, is this what you wanted?" which is a line that kinda hit me even on first listen? It just sounds so...sad, yet angry, especially with how he sings it...Though I will say that the opening lyric simply being "Amen, I guess" could be easily made fun of...but I'm not gonna do it. Not to this song. Even though it's far from one of my favorites, (and in terms of sad family songs doesn't come close to "You Let Me Walk Alone" levels), it's a good song. Prediction: I don't think Austria really have that much of a chance....but that doesn't mean they're doomed. They could touch hearts with this song, or they could be overlooked, could go either way. I personally think, um.....they won't qualify. Just cuz of the competition.

Song: Mata Hari Country: Azerbaijan Thoughts: Should I be annoyed at how blatantly Azerbaijan recycled their 2020 song? XD Well, I'm not! If anything, I find it funny that they included the line "Just like Cleopatra", which I took as full-on self awareness.....And I also don't mind because the song is awesome, so yeah. I can't help it, I'm a sucker for this stuff! I don't care how many times the song's name is yelled, it still sounds soooooo good! The instrumentals are amazing! The one before the end is easily the best part of the song. Y'know, where she just says "Let's go" and then the beat goes crazy? Perfect. This is a very solid borderline favorite for me. My only real gripe is that...uh, it's "goddess", not "godless"...I can clearly hear her pronounce an L and it bugs me. XD Prediction: In true Azerbaijan fashion, I think this'll be an easy qualifier. It's not a front-runner, but it's a very memorable song and there isn't really anything else like it in the first semifinal (maybe Israel if you squint? But that's a stretch) In the final, hmmmm....maybe it'll place in the middle somewhere? I don't think it'll do as good as "Truth" at least. That's my prediction.

Song: The Wrong Place Country: Belgium Thoughts: Not only is this a grower, but it's also the biggest grower of the bunch for me. Every year, there's that one song that I start out mostly indifferent to, that I do NOT expect to like as much as I end up liking it. The "O Jardim", the "Roi". This year, it's this one. It took me a few listens, but now I really like this song. I can't even explain why, it's just....cool! I like the dark, somber atmosphere of this song, and how it doesn't cross over into overly moody. It's just cool. And I like the lyrics, too. They flow really well, and I like how much detail there is. The whole thing just works so well....well, except for the line about the Johnny Cash t-shirt. That's just baffling. And that's the lyric they end the song with...but other than that, it's a great song that tells a story, with the atmosphere to match, and I really like it. Prediction: The only reason I'm not saying this is an easy qualifier is that the first semifinal is gonna be a bloodbath. XD I just went down the list, counting all the fan-favorites that would normally be shoo-ins, and I counted ELEVEN songs. There's GONNA be outrage that day, I just know it. Personally, I think Belgium could still do it, but it'll be really tough. I want them in the final, but my opinion doesn't matter here. Them making it will probably take a lot of effort, honestly, and...it could go either way. If I had to give an answer to what I think will happen, I'd say that they'll barely not qualify. But I'd be more than happy to be proven wrong! (As long as that doesn't mean losing Croatia in the process)

Song: Growing Up Is Getting Old Country: Bulgaria Thoughts: This one's....difficult. Not the MOST difficult song to rank (that's Cyprus), but man, it took me a while to figure out what I felt about it. In the end, I've decided that I...kinda like it. I'm putting it right at the bottom of the "like" category. Now, I know that a lot of people love this song, so just let me explain: I don't normally enjoy this kind of vocal. I didn't care for "Sebi" two years ago cuz it bored me, for example. This song at least builds a little bit, but it's not that exciting. Musically, this song doesn't do much for me, and that's why I'm ranking it so low. BUT....I love the lyrics. This is such a relatable song. Growing up does indeed get very, very, VERY old, and I worry about it all the flipping time. I do wish I could run from those worries. I like the reference to anxiety. I like lines like "Playing Tetris with my feelings, tryin' to keep them all inside". I like the switch to “Getting up is growing old”. It's really clever. Not to mention, her lethargic vocals actually FIT this subject. She's tired. So, I do appreciate this song for, well....speaking to me, even if I don't love it like so many others do. Prediction: Will definitely qualify without much issue. I can also see it doing pretty well in the final, like....Bulgaria have been in the top five twice in recent years, so this could possibly put them back up there? I personally don't think this song should be that high, but hey, this isn't about my feelings, this is my prediction. Uhhhh.....top ten.

Song: Tick-Tock Country: Croatia Thoughts: The first of my top seven favorites! Ohhhhh MAN did this song blindside me! When I first heard it, I remember the chorus letting me down! It was mostly due to not being what I expected from the pre-chorus, I guess I expected the music to burst with emotion or at least be louder.....but after only two or three listens, it grew on me completely, and I found myself trying to learn the lyrics and sing along. This is NOT another "Icebreaker", that’s for sure. I love the whole thing as it is and I wouldn't change a thing about it. This song is so! Darn! CATCHY! That chorus is incredibly infectious! Man, that beat is so flipping good! And when it switches to Croatian for a chorus, mmmmm good stuff! As someone who actually really enjoyed "Crazy", I still say this is Croatia's most solid entry since.....geez, 2010? Hope this one is more, um, successful than that one ended up being... Prediction: Oh no, oh no, oh noooooooo~....I really hope this doesn't end up underrated like Croatia's entries tend to be, but something tells me that I shouldn't be....TOO worried? ....OK, I'm still worried. XD The first semifinal is LOADED with awesome songs, so unless the staging for this is really really cool, it MIGHT struggle to stand out? Keyword being "might", cuz this is still a very good song....Maybe just being a good song will be enough! Of my two favorites in that semifinal, I'm more worried about Slovenia than Croatia, honestly. At least Croatia have an upbeat song. I'll try to be optimistic, and predict that it'll qualify. A lot of people seem to like it, so why not? However, if it doesn't qualify, I won't be too shocked....There's a lot of fan-favorites it's gonna have to compete with to get through. XD If it does make it, then I can't see it doing THAT badly in the final...

Song: El Diablo Country: Cyprus Thoughts: Hoo boy, here we go....So, this is easily the hardest song for me to rank. I'm sure that after I post this, I'll already be second-guessing my placement for it. But for now, here it goes......I love the chorus to this song just so much! It's SUCH a good thing to belt to, and I wish I could. I even love the "OooooooOOOOOOOOHHH~" after it! She has a GOOD singing voice! ...Too bad she barely uses it. Yeeaaaahhh, I'm...not very crazy about the rest of the song. The speak-singing verses, I got used to after a while, but they're still just ehhh. And the pre-chorus where she's just panting in the back with no other music? The bridge, where there's that stupid "I love El Diablo" chant that sounds like a playground taunt? Annoying. It feels like she's trying WAY too hard to be Lady Gaga, complete with throwing in words to another language for no reason other than to sound ~spicy~. As a fan of Lady Gaga, I'm sorry, but you're not doing a very good job! As I've said before, it's hard to come up with a concrete answer for how I feel about this song, because it has stuff I like AND stuff I don't like! And not only that...it's a BIG divide between the two. I don't just like the chorus, I LOVE the chorus. It's a SHORT chorus, but I love it! There are times I enjoy the song despite my complaints with it....but there are other days where I don't have enough patience to deal with stupid panting and "I lOvE eL dIaBlO", so really, I'm super torn here. I know this song's very popular, and I can see the appeal, I just wish I liked it more (especially since I've really liked the last few entries from Cyprus). Prediction: This song's currently in the top ten in the betting odds, so I think it might do a lot better than I expect. I personally don't think it's a top ten song, but it'll at least qualify for the final. And maybe do pretty well. Left side of the scoreboard, maybe? Cyprus are NOT an underrated country anymore, and the song's got a lot of energy, and it's definitely memorable, I'll give it that.

Song: omaga Country: Czech Republic Thoughts: Another song that has me conflicted, but not nearly as much as Cyprus'. My opinion on this one is a lot more simple: love the music, kinda iffy about the lyrics. This feels like it's sung by the kinda person that Destiny from Malta warns the ladies to stay away from. "You say you're still mad about the things that I did, but I don't know what I did". "Why don't you come over and have it? Why don't you let me have it?" I'm not the only one who thinks he's being really pushy, am I? I do think this song's just meant to be playful, but, uh....it doesn't come off that way to me. I mean, I guess I like the rhyming of "apocalypse" with "on my lips", that's pretty clever and I've never heard it before? But...overall, the lyrics honestly kinda creep me out. It reminds me of someone who just will not take no for an answer even when it's obvious that his presence isn't wanted because he thinks that she's just "playing hard to get". And she's not playing hard to get! He outright says that he did something to piss her off! Dude, leave her alone! Even if you're playing dumb saying you "don't know" what you did, that's not a reason to keep pestering her! ....But, *sigh* I can't be too mad at the song. When you get down to it, the most important thing in a song (especially in Eurovision) is the music, not the lyrics, and...this song sounds fantastic. It's really catchy, with a nice fun party vibe. I do enjoy listening to this when I don't think about it too hard. It's probably the most fun I've had listening to a Czech entry, so I still like it for that. This isn't a song worth being mad over. (Except the title. That title is so flipping stupid. Just say "oh my god", it's not hard. But that's a nitpick, pffff) Prediction: I kinda don't want this song to qualify since there are others in the second semifinal that I'd prefer to make it instead. Despite liking it, this is still one of my more least-favorites in that semi. XD But I still say this has a fair shot of qualifying, despite being performed early. But with the competition in the party song department by Serbia, Moldova, and San Marino, and their fairly low amount of fan attention, I'm gonna say no for this one. But I won't hate it if it qualified (as long as it doesn't push out Greece or Finland, which I don't think it will).

Song: Øve Os På Hinanden Country: Denmark Thoughts: Heck YEAH to Denmark sending a song in Danish! It's great to hear uncommon languages in Eurovision from countries that normally send songs in English! And dare I say that that's not my favorite thing about this song? Because this is another of my favorites! This song's been getting a flack for being "dated", and....yeah, maybe it is, but so what? I never claimed to have perfect taste, and I LOVE this kinda thing! 80s music is back, I say! Gosh, this song is so HAPPY! Well, uh, I can't even understand it, but it feels happy. And the instrumentation is so flipping good! The horns, the strings, UGH! I can't not smile while listening to this. If you don't like this song, that's fine, it's not for everyone...but I really appreciate Denmark for trying something different this year, especially since it turned into something that's completely to my tastes. Prediction: Yeah, uh...the odds don't look good for Denmark. Performing last, after so many people have made up their minds? With a song that's already not popular at all? Yeah....if they DO manage to qualify, I'll be VERY happy, but I don't think it's gonna happen...Man, most of my favorites are in danger this year...Eh, I'm used to it. But I'll say that they COULD possibly do it, due to nothing else sounding like them!

Song: The Lucky One Country: Estonia Thoughts: Oh look, another one of my favorites! Wow, what an emotional gut-punch this song is....these lyrics are seriously SO good. "Why'd you have to go and mess it up? Why'd you have to make what was unbreakable / Shakeable, unsaveable" "For a little while, the fates were with us / Wonder why they had to turn against us? / I could make a wish, but there is no use" "Thought I had a cloud over my head / It had to be my fault that it kept raining down, until, now, I figured out / That if I had the nerve to say goodbye, I could look for clearer skies up overhead" I....think that's enough, but holy crap, this song's mix of heartbreak and optimism is just PERFECT. "You broke my heart, but maybe that's a good thing, maybe I'm the lucky one because you're awful and I don't have to put up with it anymore." It's emotional, it's bittersweet, it's powerful...and it SOUNDS powerful too! Those quiet verses bursting into that chorus is great! This song is so flipping good! Why is it so underrated!? ...Oh yeah, cuz people who want emotion are to distracted by Switzerland's entry, I guess...or maybe it's just me, but eh. While I don't love it quite as much as my top three, this is a very solid fourth placer for me. Prediction: This song isn't qualifying, and I've accepted it. It's gotten very little attention (the music video is one of the ones under 1 million views), it was dead last in the betting odds last time I checked, and to top it off, it's being performed second in its semifinal, which won't do it any favors. I really do wish it could surprise me, but I don't think it will. I'm not getting my hopes up.

Song: Dark Side Country: Finland Thoughts: OH HECK YEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHH! Finland once again appealing to my tastes! OH MY GOD do I love this song! People have been heaping praise on this song left and right, so I can't say anything that hasn't already been said....but I'll praise it anyway! This song is so flipping intense! It manages to be dark while pumping me up for action, and being the best song at doing that this year. There's not much to say about the lyrics because I BARELY pay attention to them while listening (which is pretty much the only reason this isn't my number one), my brain just turns off all analytical thinking in favor of "HOO HOO HOO HOO EVERY PSYCHO IN THE SCENE HANDS UP AND FOLLOW ME" without caring about the actual words. I just love the music and vibe so much that it pulls me in so well! It goes so hard! That great hook that starts the song off also gives the song something catchy about it, too! Also points for including the line "We don't wanna grow up", that's great too. This is a song that you put on just to pump yourself up and feel awesome. The lyrics are pretty messed up, which makes me not wanna sing them out loud, but that barely counts as a point against it. It fits with the song's tone, and just....man, I remember how blindsided I was when I first heard it. That was my first clue that this would be something special. I'm also really happy that this song is getting attention because boy is that not true for a lot of my other favorites. XD Prediction: Despite Finland being one of the most underrated countries in the contest's history, with consistently poor results despite sending good song after good song...This one got popular, and most of the attention has been positive, to the point of it being just outside the top ten in the betting odds last I checked! So, I'm gonna be cautiously optimistic here and predict that they'll qualify without much issue. They're one out of only two of my favorites (the other being Greece) that I feel like I don't have to worry about. The song does a good job of standing out, which should help it a lot. As for how it'd do in the final...well, I want it to be in the top 10, but after whatever the frick happened with "Monsters" I'm convinced that Finland HAVE to end up underrated in some way...The only thing I can really say is that it'll probably give them their best result in years (since coming 11th that one time in 2014)? But that's all I can really say.

Song: Voilà Country: France Thoughts: If I can sum up my feelings about this one in one sentence it'd be....this is the new "City Lights" for me. Y'know, the Belgian entry in 2017? Got wildly popular, but I never fully understand why? Just found it kinda boring, and was indifferent to it? Yeah, copy and paste that here. In a year occupied by some really fun, happy pop songs, some really powerful ballads, and even a couple hardcore rock songs...a song like this is one of the favorites to win. And I'm sorry, but I don't...get it? Am I stupid? (Well, you'll probably think I'm stupid once we get to my number one but-) Why are people going nuts over this? This is one of the more boring songs of the year if you ask me! But that's being too harsh, cuz I CAN see that there's talent here. The vocals are nice, and I do give it points for growing on me at least a little. At the start, this was my least-favorite, but it's not anymore. I at least appreciate it for building at lot. I almost feel myself come close to liking it toward the end, when it's at its fastest. But that still isn't enough for me to see it as the potential winner that so many people see it as. If you like it, that's great! But even though I see the talent here, I can't jump on the bandwagon. I don't dislike it in the slightest, though. I will say that I'll take another "City Lights" over another "Amar Pelos Dois" any day of the week. At least if this song wins, I can say that it won't taint my view of the whole year. I'll just be like "cool, good for them". Prediction: I'd much rather Malta or Switzerland win over this, but I still can't rule out the possibility, which just how many people love this song and are rallying behind it. I can see the juries drooling over it too. If this does win, I'll see it coming, that's for sure. The possibility over a big five country that's not Italy doing so well feels weird, I'll admit...They're usually so underrated cuz they don't have to go through a semifinal. XD But back to my prediction, ummm....it's gonna do really well, I can't deny that. But since I consider myself Team Malta (or Italy) here, I'm gonna go with my gut and say that it won't win. Top five, though.

Song: You Country: Georgia Thoughts: Meh.....this one's probably my least-favorite, but not by a LOT. In fact, I far from outright dislike it. There are times when I find it kinda relaxing to listen to. Between this and my least-favorite in 2019, I think this one's less boring, which is a good point in this year's favor! It's more like...something's gotta be in last place, and this song's still pretty boring by comparison to everything else. But it's still a simple love song that has some nice lyrics, it's not annoying, and there's nothing wrong with it...well, there's nothing wrong with the SONG, that is... Prediction: Not qualifying. Yeah, this is an easy one. XD Now, um, I haven't SEEN this, but multiple people have claimed that the singer has said some really sketch stuff, which resulted in this already forgettable song....pretty much being a guaranteed flop. Granted, the video doesn't have quite as many dislikes as others (like.....P-Poland's....I'll get to that later), but it's still got a lot. If Georgia do qualify, I can easily see people getting upset. But I don't think it's gonna happen.

Song: I Don't Feel Hate Country: Germany Thoughts: OK, so....this song. This flipping song. By all counts, I should find it annoying. I really should. It's a song that reeks of passive-aggressive, better-than-you energy and I normally hate that! No, stop acting like you're sorry for me, you condescending prick! ...But dang it, I can't be mad at this song. I just can't. It just wouldn't be Eurovision without the resident goofy joke song, and this one fits the bill. Taking this thing seriously would make me look stupid. Not only that, but...I dunno if this is just me being very easily amused, but I just find this song funny? Like, actually funny? It's made me laugh multiple times! The lines that did so being the backing vocals going "SAY WHAT? He did not just say that!" followed by "Yes I did, and I feel sorry! I don't feel hate, that's the whole point of the song!" And even the stupid thing toward the end where it goes "So you can wigglewigglewigglewiggleWIGGLEWIGGLEWIGGLE-" It just puts a big dumb smile on my face, I can't help it! And the attitude of the singer goes down a lot easier when I think of him singing this to actual hateful people who lash out with bigoted comments, so that's helped it for me. If you don't like this song, I completely understand why. It's not for everyone! But it gets a thumbs-up from me (and not a middle finger) Prediction: I...don't know how this song's gonna go over with people? Will it annoy, or will it amuse? Will it be the next "Hatrið mun sigra" or the next "Moustache"? According to the betting odds, and the fact that it's Germany, I'm leaning more towards the latter. I don't see this doing particularly well. I can see the televoters liking it more than the juries at least, but it's still gonna be towards the bottom. I do think they'll do better than last or close to last, though. This song does have a lot of personality, that's for sure!

Song: Last Dance Country: Greece Thoughts: This song is breathtaking.....as in, whenever it comes on, it makes me stim so hard that I'm literally out of breath when it ends! And that's a really....really really good thing! Dear GOD this song is so awesome! Easily a top three choice for me. I already talked about why I love it before, and everything I said then is still true. I'm ever-so-slightly biased because I love songs that make me think of scenarios, and visualize them...especially when it's of, uh....w-well, uh....ideas of the comfort ship variety....And this song makes me think of dancing with my F/O (fictional other), feeling on top of the world, but also terrified of the moment ending, as she has to leave soon, so I hold on to her, not wanting to let go, wanting to savor this feeling until the dream is over....Uh, s-sorry for getting all poetic and stuff, but....I LOVE this song even beyond that bias! Listening to it is more of a rush than the song literally named "Adrenalina". The chorus BLASTS you with so much raw energy, it really DOES make you feel like you're dancing for your life until your lungs give out! You can feel the happiness, and the desperation, just so much...Truly, "Last Dance" is the PERFECT title. The verses aren't quite as strong as the chorus, which is the ONLY reason this song isn't my number one, but that dang chorus is enough for me to fall head-over-heels in love with it anyway. EASILY the best Greek entry for many many years. They've really, truly outdone themselves. Prediction: This has gotta qualify! Even if it doesn't get the awesome staging it deserves, it's still gotta qualify! This is one of the most popular songs in the second semifinal! Well, according to the betting odds anyway.....but c'mon! My energy SHOULD go into worrying about Poland and Estonia, so let me be right about this....let Greece be a shoo-in like I'm sure they are! I dare say that this could even finish on the left side of the board in the final! Unless some other songs REALLY surprise people live, but....for now, that's my prediction and I'm sticking to it!

Song: 10 Years Country: Iceland Thoughts: I wonder how Iceland feel about being the "projected winners of 2020". XD It's kinda like being an "honorary" winner, and....yeah, this country that's never won before, but has come second twice? They could've done it finally! But it didn't happen. It's like....is it a good thing to know that, or not to? Maybe a bittersweet mix of both....but the good thing that came out of it is that their artist got to come back this year with this song. My first word to describe this song is cute. It's a very adorable idea, being thankful for your spouse of ten years, and writing a song about it....Couple goals, honestly. XD That's enough for me to like it, cuz that's just so wholesome! But this is also a fun disco song, and it definitely stands out among everything else this year. So, thumbs up to Iceland yet again! Only other thing of note for me is that when I first heard it, the line "How does he keep getting better" led me to think this song was about a gay couple, and....it's not. He wrote it for his wife. I just find it kinda funny that I misinterpreted it that way, heh....(and it's not the only song that I misinterpreted, wait till we get to Portugal) Prediction: People love this artist and people love this song. It's gonna qualify. Not a winner (unfortunately for them), but it'll still do very well.

Song: Maps Country: Ireland Thoughts: Yet another grower. This is a really fast-paced song that I imagine would make good running music, and the lyrics are pretty good! I really like the line "My soul is a map, my heart is a compass, I am the road" for some reason...dunno why, but it sticks with me. Also, can't go wrong with strong drums! I just like the mood of this song overall, too. Happy, uplifting....freeing! Gives of the feeling of an explorer setting off to parts unknown, which is something that no other song this year does. Makes it unique! Whenever this comes on, I enjoy it a lot, but I sadly can't rank it any higher. It's still definitely one of Ireland's more solid, fun entries in recent years, up there with "22". I still like "22" a bit more since it was catchier, but this song is no slouch and I wish it got more attention. Prediction: *in the tone of Deerie from Helluva Boss* Yeeeeeaaaaaaahhhhh, no...Sorry, Ireland, but I think you're doomed. I really like this song and I want it to do well! Ireland have had such bad luck in the past, too! But they've got no chance in the first semifinal. A miracle would have to happen for this to qualify. It's really unfortunate...

Song: Set Me Free Country: Israel Thoughts: Pretty catchy! I like the rhyming flow of the verses a lot, even if I still can't fully understand the lyrics (which....I dunno whether to blame on her voice or me not liking the song quite enough to wanna sing along to lyrics that go by so quickly). What I could make out is well-written, though - if Estonia's entry is about the heartbreaking parts of breaking up, this song is about the liberating parts. I'm free, now I can dance! "Set me FREEEEE~!" That part is so good. Sadly, this song isn't an absolute favorite of mine...partly cuz the "Imma, imma, aaaaahhh" parts are a bit repetitive and slightly wear on me, but mostly cuz of competition. It's one out of many upbeat, catchy songs this year, and not the best of them. Prediction: Ehhhh, this can go either way. I wanna say it'll qualify, though. Israel have been on a roll in recent years, and this song is good enough to continue that. I wouldn't call it a front-runner by any means, but it'll at least make it to the final and not bomb.

Song: Zitti E Buoni Country: Italy Thoughts: With very few exceptions, rock songs tend to...not do very well in Eurovision. Even when the songs are very good, fans of the contest just don't gravitate towards rock as much as the poppier stuff, and that's fine! Everyone has different tastes in genres, and rock fans and Eurovision fans might not overlap very much. But dang it if I still don't appreciate them showing up and loving it when they do! And especially loving it when they're as good as THIS! This song is SO good! I might prefer the Finnish entry in terms of intensity, but they're not really that comparable. This still goes REALLY hard, manages to be catchy at the same time, and I love every single turn it takes. That part where he sings really really fast, and especially that awesome bridge, ugh, it's all so good! It's not a favorite of mine PURELY due to loving other songs more, but this is one I like more every single time I hear it, and I've been bumping it higher and higher up through my borderline favorites until finally giving it a solid spot. This song's been getting a lot of attention and that makes me very happy, cuz it deserves it! Italy have topped themselves yet again. Prediction: Despite being a big fan-favorite, I don't think this is a winner....mainly due to, well, being a rock song in Eurovision (I HAVE heard the very rare complaint about it, like, saying the chorus is too loud, and....it's a rock song? That's the point???), but also....it's kinda the Italian curse at this point? XD Every single time Italy have a fan-favorite song, they just barely don't win (I still haven't forgotten how much of a shoo-in they seemed to be in 2017 before....well...people lost their minds). They do however, manage top five finishes, and I think it'll be the same thing here. I would love if it won, since I like it more than the three betters' favorites, but I'm not holding my breath. XD

Song: The Moon Is Rising Country: Latvia Thoughts: MAN this song's awesome! OK, so, you might've noticed that there are a few songs this year that have the same message: "I'm a woman and awesome". There's nothing wrong with that kinda thing at all, especially when said songs are all different in their own way! This one right here stands out RIGHT off the bat with a super powerful voice that cuts through everything and commands your complete attention, and DANG does it work! The lady's voice is outstanding, and the beat's not bad either! It's kinda repetitive with the "Padada-papa-rade" parts, but that's barely a problem when the rest of the song kicks so much butt. You got something to say? Say it to her face, coward! When it comes to the "I'm a woman and awesome" songs, I like Azerbaijan's slightly more. It's more fun. But this is a very solid song that I really enjoy, and I'm happy Latvia sent another song I like this much, with one of the best voices of the year. Prediction: Sadly, for as much praise as they've been getting on YouTube, Latvia aren't getting much love from the betters, so I have no idea how they'll do. It's very split. I wanna say that they have a chance, cuz they've got a VERY strong singer and I can also see some interesting staging to go along with it, but that's just speculation. XD Also, it's Latvia. When do they ever catch a break? So....this really could go either way, and of course I'd like them to qualify, but I'm gonna say they barely won't. Not every good song can be in the final, that's the sad truth of having so many slots.

Song: Discoteque Country: Lithuania Thoughts: Dance song for introverts, let's go! This is a fun, silly song with a good beat, and lyrics that encourage having fun by yourself ("Not like that, pervert!" - Sir Pentious, Hazbin Hotel), and....that's about it! There's not that much to talk about here, cuz with this song, what you hear is what you get. And that's fine, not every song needs to be picked apart and analyzed to explain why it's enjoyable. However, despite how much I love synth music, this song doesn't really hook me as much as other songs do. I understand the appeal, I understand why it's a fan-favorite, but to me, it lacks OOMPH. Musically, it just, kinda....stagnates? With the exception of that weird scatting part. And I think my biggest issue is that the lyrics, well, uh....immediately date it to this year, let's just say. I try to get around this by calling it a dance song for introverts, and that's how I usually think of it at this point, but yeah, it's kinda still an elephant in the room. But I still do like this song, I just don't love it. I'm happy that Lithuania are getting the attention they were denied last year, though. Prediction: Despite opening the show, I think this will be an easy qualifier, one of the songs to beat. I can see this being another top ten finish for Lithuania (maybe it'll finally break "We Are The Winner"'s record from 2006? We'll just wait and see).

Song: Je Me Casse Country: Malta Thoughts: Ohhhhhh MAN do I wish I could rank this one higher. If I wanted, I could bump it up to borderline favorite, but...I already have five of those! XD But dang it, Malta, a country that's never won Eurovision, finally pulls out a fan-favorite song (again, that is *cough*theyshould'vewonin2002*cough*), and I AGREE with that! Like the Italian entry, this is a song that gets better every time I listen to it. It's SO much fun! Not to mention the singer, Destiny - MAN, what a voice! One of the best voices of the year, I'd say (though I'm not surprised, since I loved her 2020 song too). Apparently she's a former Junior Eurovision winner? I'd believe that! I can praise her and this song for so long, and it's not even one of my favorites: I love the lyrics a lot! I'm all for positive messages, and this song manages to have fun while also doing that, AND taking jabs at sexists along the way with great lines like "I'm too good to be true, but there's nothing in it for you!" and the cute "Excuse my French~!" I love the fun swing instrumentals! I love the choir during the bridge! This is just a REALLY good song that deserves all the praise, and I'm so so happy for Malta. I'd best describe this song as "'Toy', but less jokey" (well.....lyrically. Musically, they're not that much alike, but....yeah, you get it) and I like it for for that! Prediction: Could this be Malta's year? A lot of people seem to think so! And....honestly, I'm all for it! I think this could be a very worthy winner. Not to mention, that of the current top three with the betters (this, Switzerland, and France), this is easily my favorite, so....I guess that counts as me rooting for it, unless some other song pulls a Conchita and shoots up the board after being heard live. For now, I'd say this is my pick to win (although my heart is still with Italy TTvTT) At the very least, it's a shoo-in for the final, cuz this is a singer who's been in this kinda environment and will probably sound great. I'd say at least top five!

Song: SUGAR Country: Moldova Thoughts: Moldova's back at it again with their silly antics! I absolutely love "Stay", but it's pretty clear that their entries get more buzz when they're being fun and weird. This song is neither the most fun or the weirdest of this year, but I still appreciate it all the same. Apparently this is the lady who sang in "Loca"? I remember that song....I don't think many other people do. Eh, I still like it, with its catchy rhythm, and its....weird rhymes....but this song is a vast improvement! I like the fun, flirty vibe to it. Sadly, however, with how many upbeat songs there are this year, this is one that kinda fades into the background compared to its competition....well, at least to me. It's good, but not great. I remember calling it a weaker version of the Azerbaijani entry in my first impression post, and that was way too harsh, but I still wouldn't rank it high. Prediction: However, I DO think this could qualify fairly easily. In the second semifinal with most of the mid- to low-tier songs with the betters (and really only Iceland, Finland, Bulgaria, and Switzerland being the ones to beat), this is one of the ones I think has a better chance of standing out. However, I've done this with Moldova's entries WAY too often....Loving them, predicting they'll qualify, only for them not to...I don't love this one, but it could be the same story here. For now, I'm gonna predict they'll qualify, though. I have no idea how they'll do once in the final, however...

Song: Birth Of A New Age Country: The Netherlands Thoughts: What a unique song! A language we've never heard before in Eurovision, incorporating the singer's nationality and culture into a song that sounds like nothing else this year. I'm honestly a bit surprised that this song isn't getting more attention! It's not one of my favorites, but I like it quite a bit. And not just for uniqueness points (that isn't enough to make me LIKE a song, just enough for me to RESPECT it), I honestly like how it sounds. The vocals are great, the beat is catchy, and the lyrics are very well-written. What was that about host countries never trying? XD Prediction: I want this song to do well, but I don't think it will....Well, I don't think it'll flop, but it won't be near the top either. Maybe in the 10-20 range. I do think the juries will like it.

Song: Here I Stand Country: North Macedonia Thoughts: So.....I feel like I SHOULD find this song boring, since a lot of people do, but...I like it. I don't LOVE it, but I like it! The lyrics are nice and....kinda hit home for me? At least a bit. The message of "keep pushing on, no matter what happens, don't let them break you" when coming out of a bad experience....It's nice. Kinda hard to fully explain without getting personal, so I won't. Not to mention that it has a good buildup, which is what I love in my ballads. In fact, maybe it's just me, but you know what song this reminds me of? "Home". At least musically. And I liked that song too, I thought it was underrated. Also, this has nothing to do with the actual song, but the video, but....even though I HATE being reminded of last year's cancellation, I like seeing the singer's thought process when writing this song. Even if people will probably think it's a pity party, I appreciate this song a fair bit. I know I'll probably look stupid for saying I think this song is more interesting than "Proud", but eh, that's FAR from my most unpopular opinion this year, just wait.... Prediction: Considering it's this year's "Home", and "Home" was so underrated that I believe it probably wouldn't have been in the final if it wasn't from the host country....Part of me wants to say that this song's doomed. Macedonia are normally one of the unluckiest countries in this contest's history no matter how good their songs are, and having one year where the juries loved them probably won't buck that trend. A lot of people are gonna overlook this song for being a fairly standard ballad, and yeah, it kinda is. So I don't think it's gonna qualify.

Song: Fallen Angel Country: Norway Thoughts: I loved this song from the first time I heard it. It was the first song of the bunch that I memorized the lyrics to. I like singing along to it. But I was certain, like DEAD certain, that it wouldn't go above a guilty pleasure to me. At first glance, this sounds like a really cheesy boy band song from the 90s, which is why I thought people were gonna eat it alive, and I was gonna have to attempt to explain myself for liking it (like I'm gonna do for the Polish entry). I grew up with this kind of music! I like it! And it's catchy! And the lyrics are just SO good! Feeling like you're not good enough for the person you love, and thinking that there's no way they can be happy with you, are feelings I really really relate to...so it's no wonder I jumped on those lyrics and etched them into my brain as quickly as I could. Helping that is that my current crush IS female, so I can easily sing this song while thinking of her...but even with that, I was still very hesitant to rank this song super high. After all, the reasons I had for liking it were purely just bias, right? That doesn't mean it's a good song, and people are still gonna make fun of it! I can see why they'd make fun of it! ....That's what I thought, but then I saw that it was ranked highly in the betting odds. And I no longer felt like I had to regret liking it anymore. And THEN, the music video finally was released, and HOO BOY, was this song so much deeper than I (or nearly ANYONE) thought...This isn't just a love song. It's about TIX's feelings of self-loathing. About being mistreated for a disability. It was his story. I was SO shocked at how wrong I was, and now I....kinda feel bad for projecting myself into it? I still can't help it, but....no, it's not about that anymore. I love this song fully and unironically, and I will never call it cheesy again. If you don't like the sound of it, or take it at face value, that's perfectly fine. But I love it. While this doesn't QUITE break into my top seven favorites, it's a very solid eighth. Prediction: Please qualify please qualify PLEASE!! Since it's in the Bloodbath Semi and fan-favorite songs WILL be cut, I'm really really hoping for this not to be one of those. This deserves to be in the final! I'd even say that this deserves it more than Slovenia and Croatia (songs I actually like more)! B-but...ugh...I can't say for certain that it'll be safe, that's the thing...but, haaaaah, OK, I'll predict it'll qualify. I think I'm overreacting. Norway have a pretty good record. I can see the people who like this song being enough to make it do pretty well, though it's definitely not a winner.

Song: The Ride Country: Poland Thoughts: You ever have a song that you can't focus on anything during? Like, you're focusing on something else with music playing in the background, but then that one song comes on and you just HAVE to take a break so you can listen to it because it's just SO good that it steals all your attention? That's me with this song. "The Ride" is right, it IS a ride, a ride I NEVER wanna get off of. And considering the only other Eurovision songs to effect me in that way have been flipping "Time" and "You Are The Only One" ("Stones" came close to doing that too, but I could at least still play during it cuz it was such good action music), then it should come as no surprise that yes, this is my favorite song of the year. And yes, I KNOW how stupid I probably look saying that. This song has NOT been a popular choice, but to heck with it! I can't help what music I like! This song is just so flipping catchy and fun, it's got a nice beat, and I've loved it from first listen! I'm not sorry! Heck, it's even kinda atmospheric in a way, in that it's a good nightlife song, giving off the feel of an amusement park at night with all the rollercoasters lit up with LEDs as you feel the wind in your face, no cares, no worries....just turn your brain off and sing along. I even like the lyrics, particularly "It doesn't matter if I stumble and fall / I'll make it through, I'll never touch the ground". It's enjoying life, it's the feeling of flying, it's feeling on top of the world, it's escapism. Have I defended this silly song enough? Point is: I. Love. It. This is the first time a Polish entry has EVER topped my list, which by default makes it my favorite entry from them ever, and I'm happy to give them love (they've been my second-favorite twice, but one of those barely counts cuz it was in a weak year and also a song that sounded bad live, so....yeah, my former favorite Polish entry was their 1998 entry, which....didn't do well, but uh, that's then not now ^^;) Prediction: This is what I've been dreading....for a song that makes me wanna leave all my stress behind, it sure does stress me out thinking of how much HATE it's getting, oh boy oh boy! Though, from what I've picked up, MOST of the hate has come from fellow Polish people who are upset that it wasn't who they wanted as their entry? So...that's not accurate to how everyone else thinks? Well, that's what I've seen, at least....This song's still not doing very well in the betting odds, and also, being an electronic song, the possibility if it sounding worse live than in the studio is....definitely a possibility.....S-so....yeah....Sadly, as much as I love it, I can't trick myself into thinking it has a chance....It's probably not gonna qualify....If it does surprise me (which HAS happened before with favorites I thought were doomed!) I'll probably flip out!! Unlike Estonia's entry however, I don't think it's AS doomed, might stand out more, and a small part of me wants to hope...The fact that the semifinal it's in, the second, is the one with the less fan-favorites, does increase its odds ever so slightly...b-but uh, I don't wanna get too hopeful! I don't want my heart broken again like with "Look Away" two years ago (which I LEGIT thought had a chance XD)

Song: Love Is On My Side Country: Portugal Thoughts: Kay, so first, before talking about my thoughts, lemme share the hilarious misunderstanding I had about this song for the first few times I heard it: I normally don't watch the videos, I only listen to the playlist in the background as I play video games or do other stuff. Even the first time I heard the songs, I didn't watch the videos, I just had the music playing in one tab and was focusing on typing on Tumblr. And....I thought this song was sung by a woman. True story. I thought it was a woman with a very unique voice, and I was gonna praise the song for that. But nope! Took me WAY too long - about over a WEEK, the time I decided to start reading comments - for me to learn the singer's a man. OOPS. XD But at least it kinda makes sense for me to think that way? With lyrics like "I never thought I'd be queen", he's clearly telling the story of a woman. In fact, I learned that it's the true story of a woman he met (I forget the details though). So yeah, I thought that was kinda funny, but how do I actually feel about the song? Well, it's a grower! I was worried that it'd stagnate for me and I'd end up indifferent, but the unique voice combined with a subject that I normally like (staying optimistic in bad situations) won me over. I don't love it, but it's nice and has good lyrics. You really feel bad for the woman (seriously, leaving home at sixteen?) so it's effective. I wanna believe love is on my side too... Prediction: This one's tough, cuz a lot of people do love this song, and it does a good job of standing out by being the slowest song in its semifinal, I don't really think a lot of people will gravitate toward it? And that it just barely won't qualify? But it could really go either way. I'm gonna predict it won't qualify and that it'll be the "robbed" one people will be upset about in the second semi. But maybe I'm just saying that cuz that semi will already be painful for my favorites, too...and I'd prefer Poland, Denmark, or Estonia's slim SLIM chances to come through over this.

Song: Amnesia Country: Romania Thoughts: This song is just a whole mood. I could just end my thoughts with that one sentence, cuz that really just about sums it up. XD Self-love is something I've always struggled with, and I've been trying really really hard to get better at it this year. Without getting too personal, there was something that happened a few months back that made me realize just how badly my hatred for myself was effecting people around me, and that I needed to lighten the crap up before it comes off the wrong way and....I-I bring others down with me....But after all that, it was HARD. It really did feel like I.....lost myself trying to have it all. But I'm slowly learning to better myself, and this song spoke to me because of that. "If you feel what I feel, don't bring yourself down, you're not alone, not alone now". It's simple, but it works. Admittedly, I respect this song more than I like it, but I do like it. There are just a lot of songs I'd prefer to listen to. And the POV switching from first to second-person confuses me a bit (she says that YOU'RE not alone, and then that SHE lost herself, and then goes back to YOU'RE not alone? Who's the one with the amnesia?) but that's just a nitpick, and I've heard much worse English in Eurovision than that. This is still a good song with a very good message that I needed to hear. Prediction: Even in the bloodbath that will be the first semifinal, I do think this song's mostly safe? Mostly...Romania haven't had the best of luck the past 2-3 years, but their record is still mostly hits, and this song's still the favorite of people. But some favorites are gonna get snubbed, and honestly, I wouldn't mind if it's this one. There are songs I like more. But for my actual prediction, um....I think it'll qualify.

Song: Russian Woman Country: .....Russia Thoughts: This one's a grower. I can't deny its catchiness. Sometimes it's gets in my head completely randomly, particularly that slow part with the...is that a choir? Um, background singers. That part (I don't wanna butcher Russian lyrics, sorry! >.<) But, even with that, I don't fully love this song. I know it's gotten a lot of attention, but to me, it just....doesn't hit very much? I thought about it, and I came up with this: this is a song by a Russian woman, for Russian women, and ONLY Russian women. It's about how strong they are, and how they should rise up against their country's sexism and- it's all very specific to Russia? So, I can't really enjoy it as much as the people its aimed at, and that's fine, because, well, it's NOT aimed at me and I shouldn't pretend it is! I'm not even in the target audience for this whole dang contest! XD So, my opinion DOES NOT reflect what I think of the quality of the song. The song's good. It's very catchy. There's nothing wrong with it. I just can't relate to it, which make it my personal least-favorite of the "I'm a woman and awesome" songs of this year. (What happened to Little Big tho?...) Prediction: Yeah, they're gonna easily qualify, even in such a stacked semifinal they're safe. They've been shooting up the betting odds recently, so I feel like they could do very well, maybe even finish in the top ten. Russia's like Sweden in that if their entry is popular, its guaranteed a spot toward the top. XD

Song: Adrenalina Country: San Marino Thoughts: Holy CRAP is this one heck of a grower! When I first heard it, I was more confused by the sudden appearance of Flo Rida of all people to really think about if I like the song. And for a while, I didn't even think I liked the rap all that much? I do like plenty of mid-song raps, but this one I felt didn't really fit the song all that well. Like it was just pasted in there from another song entirely. But, a few listens later, and I started rapidly liking this song more and more. Fitting for its name, there's just nothing but energy here. It's a great song to put on to just....pump me up! The whole thing's just dripping with a sense of pure fun. The instrumentals are great, it just sounds so good! In terms of growers, this is a close second to the Belgian song. Also, while I'm not a huge fan of Flo Rida normally, comparing past Sanmarinese entries I will say that his rap is a LOT better than the rapping in "Who We Are" was, that's for sure! Prediction: This song doing so well in the betting odds is.....honestly amazing. XD This is the most hype San Marino's EVER gotten, which I think could qualify them for the final? But also, maybe not...with San Marino, you never know. They are helped by Flo Rida's name recognition but there's NO way he's as big in Europe as he is in America (and even in America, I haven't met that many people who are actually fans of Flo Rida), so...is it enough? I think it very well could be! It's a very good song, and Senhit's been in Eurovision before so hopefully she knows what she's doing on stage. Also, this is a song that better have cool staging with it! But for my prediction....screw it, I'm gonna predict they're gonna qualify. I even say this as I have favorites in the second semifinal that they're definitely gonna push out, but ah well...

Song: LOCO LOCO Country: Serbia Thoughts: Yet another super fun, upbeat song! And while I don't love this song as much as others (Poland's, Denmark's, and Azerbaijan's entries, even San Marino's at this point), this is still one of my more favorite of that type, and I....honestly couldn't tell you why! It has a lot of energy, but it sounds different enough to stand out. And it's catchy while not being in English! I kinda wish I could learn Serbian so I could sing along to this...XD It also grabs my attention from the very start. I dunno why, but I love that "Hur- Hur- Hur- Hurricane!" followed by the beat starting, I find it to be a cool and infectious way to pump me up for the song. Overall, one of the songs that I don't think about a lot, but when it comes on, I enjoy every second...Oh and also it has one of the most exciting key changes of this year so there's that too. Good job to Serbia! Prediction: I think this one's a fair bet to qualify! However, it's not guaranteed. They're not attracting THAT much attention in the betting odds (which surprises me a bit), but the second semifinal seems to be where MOST of the lower-ranked songs are (sadly, says the person with three favorites in it), and among those, I think Serbia will most likely make it. The song stands out a lot. So I'm gonna predict they'll qualify! But if they don't, ah well, it could be to make way for a song I like more (hopefully...I wouldn't wanna say goodbye to this song to make way for the Czech or Austrian songs), so I wouldn't mind THAT much I hope. As for the final, they're definitely not a front-runner, so I could see them ultimately stuck around the middle. Unfortunate since I like this song a lot.

Song: Amen Country: Slovenia Thoughts: Where to start with this one....This is one of my favorites, and it's in the same way as "Stay" in 2019 and "Mall" in 2018 where I have a hard time really articulating why. It's a song that makes me FEEL, and it's hard to convey that in words, so yeah! This song just....hits me so hard in the gut whenever I hear it, so I love it! It's effective at its job! Even the big thing that I thought would hold it back for me - being a religious song - didn't hurt it at all in the end. The lyrics are ambiguous enough that it doesn't JUST come off as preachy and religious and that's all. It can also be taken as a song of rising above tragedy...The most religious thing it does is mention the heavens casting you out, and that can be taken in multiple ways. But if it is meant to be religious, that's fine, I've already made the decision to love it. I'm agnostic, so I don't outright hate religious music if it's not trying to shove messages in my face. The moment I fell in love with this song was one day when I was feeling really down, was listening to the playlist to unwind, and then this song came on right after Romania's entry (which I already talked about relating to a lot). When I heard the chorus, I literally teared up. THIS is the song that made me cry this year. Not Austria's or Spain's (the songs literally about dead family members), but this one. Is that...something to be ashamed about? XD I just....really love the lyrics...."The storm's relentless, but everybody knows, everybody knows we're born to the fight"...It really just sounds so uplifting, and yes, spiritual. And even beyond that, I just like how the song sounds! I love ballads that build, and this one BUILDS, with such a soaring chorus. The vocals are outstanding, too! That's one powerful voice! I also really love how, after you think it's over, it comes back for one final chorus, that's probably one of the best parts of the song. This song makes GREAT use of the recorded backing vocals, making the choir sound absolutely massive, a lot more than it'd be live. It really makes it sound so big and grand....Uh, I've rambled about this song enough, haven't I? Uhhh, point is: This is my favorite ballad of the year and I'm not sorry. I think it's underrated as heck. Prediction: And because it's underrated as heck, and in such a packed bloodbath of a semifinal crammed full of fan-favorites battling to the death, I....don't think....it'll qualify.....I'd obviously LOVE it too, but the competition's so flipping strong, and....I-it's still just a ballad, so it's not to everyone's tastes...I-I've come to terms with that fact, and if Croatia make it, I'll try not to be too bummed when this doesn't.

Song: Voy A Quedarme Country: Spain Thoughts: At first, I was pretty indifferent to this song, but it slowly grew on me, and now I like it. It builds just enough to keep me interested. It's still low tier compared to everything else, but I can appreciate it all the same. It sounds so emotional that I went into comments to see if there was some kind of story attached to it, and, uh....let's just say that there is, and....it's depressing. But it did make me respect the song even more. There's not a lot to say here, but that doesn't mean it's bad. It's just....overshadowed, I guess. Not a standout song, but it's genuine, and I like it just fine for what it is. Prediction: Oof...Spain once again find themselves overlooked, and even though the song's fine, I can see why. I can't see this doing very well...If flipping "La Venda" ended up an underrated flop, a song like this isn't gonna get Spain outta their rut. I really do wanna see them do well! But this isn't the year for that.

Song: Voices Country: Sweden Thoughts: Dang it....they did it again. XD Part of me wanted to be bummed that we didn't get The Mamas again, cuz they would've been my favorite last year, but....Sweden know what they're doing, and what they brought us was still really, really good. Like.....REALLY good. Are the lyrics on the generic side? Ummmm.....maybe? I have said that this is a relatively "safe" entry, but that doesn't mean it's not really good. More like...there's been a lot of songs with similar lyrics in Eurovision. But that doesn't take away from the music at all, which is awesome. The chorus is nice and big, the vocals are good, and the little bagpipe bits are such a neat touch. There isn't any big standout elements to me, and it's nowhere near "Too Late For Love" level, but it's just a very solid song. And.....dare I say, better than that other popular song that mentioned a million voices. Prediction: Do I even need to say anything here? XD It's a popular song from Sweden. It's gonna qualify and place in the top ten! Done!

Song: Tout l'Univers Country: Switzerland Thoughts: Switzerland are riding the high from "She Got Me" and have once again sent a big fan-favorite song! Except this time, it's one of the predicted winners! What do I think of this? Well....it's a good song. I love powerful ballads, and this one adds drums, which I also love! But at the same time....I'm not nearly as crazy about it as other people are. Don't get me wrong, I LIKE it, but...I feel like we already got this kinda song with "Arcade"? I mean, there are differences, but its got a very similar sound with a similarly big chorus. But then again, I do think that just calling it "'Arcade' but in French" would be WAYYYY too harsh. It's not a copycat, it's very much its own thing. It just seems to be a coincidence. Also, even compared to this year's songs, I enjoy Slovenia's more? If I want a powerful song, I'd take that over this. MAYBE if I understood the lyrics, I'd like it better, but even so, this song doesn't WOW me, even if it's good. I'm happy for Switzerland, but....dang it, I can't say the O word here, cuz I hear the appeal and don't wanna come off as mean to a song I DO like aaaaaaa- Prediction: Even though it's not a personal favorite, I'm not gonna deny that this song could possibly win. I feel like the juries would adore it on top of all the attention its already getting. So, yeah, it's definitely making it to the final and doing very well. As for winning, I....honestly don't think so, but only cuz of how strong the competition is. So, I'll just say that right now, it's looking like this song will give Switzerland their best result in a long long time, doing better than "She Got Me" and (tragically) "Cool Vibes". It's obvious that in terms of how I'd rank the big favorites, I'd personally prefer Malta winning, but I would prefer this to France, so it's in the middle. But even putting my opinions aside, I really can't see it pulling off the win, at most coming really close.

Song: SHUM Country: Ukraine Thoughts: Like with Malta and San Marino's songs, this is a song that, while not a favorite, gets better and better the more I hear it. I should really think about it more often, cuz this song is REALLY cool! My first instinct was to compare it to "Fire Of Love" from two years ago (a song that wasn't popular even though this song is?) but after some time, I realized that that isn't a fair comparison. Literally the only similarity is the vocal style. Everything else is different. But man is this song fun! I could look up what the lyrics mean, but I don't really feel like the lyrics matter here as much as the music does. This song is clearly about the beat. I love synth music, and I also like bouncy stuff that I can rock along to, and this song is as bouncy as can be! The lyrics do repeat, but weirdly I don't find that repetitive at all. And once I got used to it, I started to love the speed up. It's a really exciting end to the song. Talk about going out on a....high note! Haha! S-sorry.... Prediction: Yeaaaahhhh, there's no doubt that this song's gonna do very well indeed! People love it, and for good reason! It's a sure qualifier for the final, and could very well finish in the top ten.

Song: Embers Country: United Kingdom Thoughts: And finishing off this list is yet another upbeat happy song! God, I love how many of these there are this year....This one is far from the best of its kind, but it's still a lot of fun. The vocals stand out, the lyrics are nice and uplifting, and it's definitely the UK's bounciest entry in quite a few years. It feels like finally getting that uptight friend of yours to loosen up and party, y'know? XD I don't have much to say about this song, but I do like it. Prediction: What happened to "Bigger Than Us" was unfair, both its placement in the lineup and its treatment by the televoters, and it's pretty much cemented my idea that even if the UK send one of the best songs of the year, they will NOT catch a break, and that just sucks! (well, the exception being 2011, where it was the JURIES that screwed them over instead! Still did good for their standards tho) And also, like I said, this isn't the only song like this this year, so it's bound to get overlooked in favor of more popular (and even better) party songs. I don't think it'll be LAST, but it won't do particularly well. Definitely more toward the bottom than the top.

Aaaaaaaand there we go! That's all of them! Geez, despite having less entries then the past few years, this still was a LOT of rambling....so if you skipped ahead, I totally understand why. XD But if you did read all that, I'm happy you did! But I'm also sorry, pfffff. But now, the important part, my rankings!

Favorites:

1. Poland 2. Finland 3. Greece 4. Estonia 5. Denmark 6. Slovenia 7. Croatia

Borderline Favorites:

8. Norway 9. Italy 10. Azerbaijan 11. Latvia 12. Sweden

Like:

13. Belgium 14. Malta 15. San Marino 16. Serbia 17. Ukraine 18. Iceland 19. Ireland 20. UK 21. Cyprus (today at least) 22. Australia 23. Netherlands 24. Moldova 25. Romania 26. Germany 27. North Macedonia 28. Portugal 29. Israel 30. Lithuania 31. Russia 32. Switzerland 33. Czech Republic 34. Albania 35. Austria 36. Bulgaria 37. Spain

Indifferent:

38. France 39. Georgia

#eurovision #opinions

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georgescatcafe · 3 years

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vermillion — 3

rating: t warning/s: period-typical homophobia pairing/s: georgenap genres/tags: cowboy x city boy au, rancher sapnap, rich george, coming of age, slow burn word count: 3,306 summary: When Sapnap gets sent into the city to get quick cash for his family’s struggling ranch, he’s not expecting much from the experience—lights aren’t very blinding when held up to the Sun, and he’s not exactly there to play around. But then he meets George, a boy built on money, who quickly sweeps in not just paying customers but also Sapnap, leading him into what any ruddy country boy would call the mouth of the Devil: high society. Cue a summer spent by each other’s side while feelings run unbidden, uncaring of deadlines and restraints.

It should be enough for the pair—and for awhile, it is, right up until it isn’t.

+ao3 +masterpost

;;

George’s parents aren’t even home. They get inside, George unlocking the door and calling out a tentative greeting only to be met with silence. Nick turns to him.

“Dinner, maybe,” George says. He readjusts Nick’s bag from where it’s started to slide down his arm. “Come on. I can show you to your room.” Nick doesn’t have a room, not yet, he knows, but he follows George anyway when he starts walking out the foyer and past the living room, er, both living rooms. He can’t help but crane his neck when they pass a doorway leading to what looks like an open dining room and adjoining kitchen. He bumps into George then, the other having stopped at the base of a staircase to wait for him.

Nick stutters out an apology.

“It’s fine,” George replies. “I can give you a proper tour in the morning, if you want?”

Nick will have to head out earlier, to set up at the market. “Maybe,” he says.

George smiles.

Nick’s room is apparently the first room on the left.

“The bathroom is right at the end of the hall,” George says, “and my bedroom is basically right across from yours.” He points at another, slimmer door. “Linen closet if you get cold. Or if you want to switch out your pillowcase or something.” And another door. “Another guest room. We don’t have company, but sometimes my parents strike unexpected deals and we end up having someone in there. If they’re at some dinner tonight, that might happen.”

“You’re going to tell them I’m here, right?”

George hasn’t stopped smiling, but it’s dull, eyes dark and shadowed, cheeks strained. “They’ll know; don’t worry.”

“I can stay in my truck,” Nick tells him. “It’s fine.”

“But you don’t have to,” George says. “Seriously, don’t worry about my parents.” He nods to the bathroom. “We’ve got extra toothbrushes if you need them. I’ll be in my room. You won’t have to look at me anymore.”

“I like looking at you,” Nick says and then wishes he didn’t because the smile finally drops from George’s lips only for the shadows in his eyes to expand and cover his entire face. “I didn’t mean that,” he adds.

“Yeah,” George replies, “I know you didn’t.” He turns, heading towards his room. “Anyway, I’ll be in here if you need me.” He tries a smile again. It’s weak, and Nick feels bile rise in his throat. He’s not sure brushing his teeth will make the sensation go away. “Goodnight, Sapnap.”

“Night, George.”

When he spits for the nth time over the sink, the tangy sharp taste remains. Being right is always fun until it isn’t. Nick splashes water over his face, cold and stinging. When he looks up, his eyes are bordering red. He squeezes them shut before pressing his fingers into them. When he pulls his hands away, his eyes are only even more red. Whatever. He takes his toothbrush and heads back to his room.

He can’t help the glance he sends to George’s door as he passes. The lights are off. He bites back the sigh threatening to slip out and keeps walking.

;;

Despite the bed which is comfortable as hell, sleep doesn’t come easy. Every creak from downstairs puts Nick on edge, and a couple of times he hears creaking right outside his door, and he’s left to wonder just what it is George is doing out there. If it’s even George walking around. The room he’s in is big, with a high ceiling and tall windows, even for a second-storey bedroom, and it leaves him feeling open and exposed, and part of him wonders if it’d have just been better to sleep in his truck, in that market parking lot. Yeah, he was equally exposed there, but he was also in the middle of the city where shouting could wake up pretty much anyone. And he wasn’t the only one asleep under the open sky. Here, George is his friend, but that’s a new term, and Nick doesn’t plan on meeting George’s parents, not really. Here, he’s basically on his own.

Nick rolls over, tugging the sheets higher, tucking them right under his chin. It’s fine. He’s fine. It’s like first sleepover jitters. He just needs to get over it.

But there’s voices now, from downstairs, and his ears strain as he tries to listen is. It’s all accented, so it’s hard to pick out if George is among the voices. Definitely his parents, though. Nick groans, finally just giving a rough jerk to the sheets and pulling them fully over his head.

And the damn footsteps, again and again, going past his door. Seriously, what the fuck is George doing? If he didn’t hate the idea of meeting George’s parents, especially when he’s the way he is, he’d go out there and force the other to stop, marching him back to bed and tucking him in himself.

In the least weirdest way possible.

Eventually, the voices die down, and with them, so do the footsteps. Nick lets out a breath. When he looks over to the window, he’s grateful to see it’s still dark out. There’s still a chance for more than a couple of hours… hopefully.

;;

Morning is not kind to Nick. He wakes to birdsong, sunlight on his face, and that’s well enough, but it’s when he goes downstairs, planning to leave a note for George and his parents, thanking the family for their hospitality, that he sees a note is unnecessary.

“Um,” he says, and then, “good morning, sir.”

George’s father looks nice enough, if you look past the air of frigid coolness X from him while he butters a slice of toast. “Good morning,” the man replies. “Are you Nick?” The name comes out after a hesitation, and it makes Nick want to slam his head into the sparkling granite counter, embarrassment flooding him when he realizes George probably introduced him as Sapnap.

But all he does is smile and nod his head. “Yes, sir,” he replies. “You’re George’s father?” At the affirmative, he continues: “Thank you for letting me stay here. I know it’s probably inconvenient, and I’ll be out of your hair soon.”

“It’s alright,” George’s dad offers a polite smile. “George said you’re a Pappas?”

“Yes, sir,” Nick thinks he’ll be using that phrase a lot, “son of Glenn Pappas.”

“I’ve spoken to him once or twice,” the man thinks for a moment, “has your father ever mentioned a Davidson family?”

“I think I’ve heard that name, sir,” Nick replies. “I’m guessing you’re Mr. Davidson?”

“Guessed right,” Mr. Davidson replies. He spies the clock over the stove. “Well, you know us working men, I’m off. Take George with you when you go. I tell him he’s inside too often.”

Nick nods as Mr. Davidson takes a final sip from the mug that’s been sitting on the counter, placing it delicately in the sink before bidding Nick goodbye and disappearing out the doors and out the house. Nick stands alone in the kitchen before heading back upstairs to wake George.

George does not rise after the first knock, nor the second nor third.

Finally, Nick opens the door.

“George,” he says. “Wake up.”

The lump on the bed groans, shifting before settling again.

Nick sighs. “I had to talk to your dad. You have to wake up. George, what the hell.”

The blankets fall away as George sits upright, rigid. “You what?”

“Yeah,” Nick replies, “I went downstairs because I need to go to the market soon, and your dad was down there. He told me to take you with me.”

“Good,” George says at that, finally climbing out of bed, his lounge pants catching on his toes with every step he takes towards what Nick assumes is the closet. “Not good that you met my dad, though. You’re okay?”

“I didn’t want to,” Nick admits, “but he knew Pa, so I guess it went fine?”

“Stockyards, remember?” George sends him a smile oddly bright for someone who didn’t want to wake up a minute ago. “Anyway, get out.”

“What?” Nick takes a step back anyway.

“I’m going to get dressed,” George tells him, disappearing into, yup, the closet. “Get out.”

“Oh my God,” but Nick still exits the room, shutting the door behind him.

George comes out a couple minutes later, tugging a jacket on over his shoulders.

“You’re going to get hot later,” Nick says, but George waves him off.

“I’m cold now.” George leads the way downstairs. “Now come on, I’m fucking hungry. What do you want from McDonald’s? There’s one on the way back to the market.”

;;

Nick watches in both admiration and horror as George orders half the breakfast menu then proceeds to eat that and drink a large orange juice. Normally, it’d be just admiration, but George is so skinny—there’s no way he can just fit all that in there without dying. But he does, and when Nick still hasn’t exited out the parking lot after thirty seconds, George turns to him with a cocked brow.

“Weren’t you the one wanting to leave early?”

So Nick drives.

;;

The day passes much like the last, but with less awkward pauses and hesitation. Banter comes easy between the two of them, and George brings in customers while Nick leaves them satisfied with their purchase. The day’s inventory depletes quickly, and for that, Nick allows them an early dinner, the two of them packing up the truck and heading out before the sun’s even thought about reaching the horizon.

As they sit nursing sweet tea and picking at their pasta, George gives a sigh. “You can stay the night again,” he says.

“Do you want me to stay the night?” Nick asks.

George shrugs. “I don’t know. I mean,” he blinks, staring into his paglia e fieno before winding the fettuccine around his fork, “I like your company. I just mean—I don’t—I don’t know what I mean.” He takes a bite of his food. “Do you feel like you’re intruding?”

“No,” Nick replies, “I feel paranoid. Dissected, maybe.”

George nods, stabbing again at his pasta. “Yeah,” he says, “yeah.” He sets down his silverware finally, the metal making a small clink against his plate. “I’m sorry about that.”

“Can’t help it,” Nick says. “Oh, uh, what were you doing last night? I heard… were you pacing?”

George picks up his fork, and with the action, the pasta-twirling starts again. Nick refrains from reaching across the table to still his hand. “Yeah, that was—I went downstairs a couple times, and a couple times I was going to see if you,” he laughs, quiet, embarrassed, cheeks an obvious red, “were all settled in and stuff.”

He wasn’t. “I was,” Nick tells him, offering the other a smile. “No checking-up necessary.”

George smiles back.

;;

It takes a couple more nights at the Davidson’s before Nick meets George’s mother. Equally nice as her husband, equally frigid. “You must be the Pappas boy,” she tells him. “Nick, correct?”

“Yes, ma’am,” he replies, “and you’re Mrs. Davidson?”

She smiles at him, and Nick finds himself smiling back, though he keeps a good few steps between them. “George says he’s been working with you,” she continues, “at the market downtown?” Nick nods, and she nods too. “Good. He needs to get out more.”

“He’s definitely out more now,” Nick says, and she smiles again, tighter at the corners, though. Right. He straightens. “I’ve told your husband but thank you again for letting me stay here. I’m sure it’s inconvenient, but—”

“If Harry said it’s alright, then it’s not a problem,” Mrs. Davidson interrupts him. “And we’re equally grateful you’re getting our son out of the house. Out of his room, honestly.” She shakes her head. “Always did wonderfully at banquets.” Elegant fingers rub at the pearls on her wrist. “He’s very good at speaking when spoken to, that means.” The smile she wears now is soft, gentle as the light from above the stove.

Nick isn’t sure whether or not he’s supposed to laugh. He tugs at his shirt collar. “Well, I’m glad to help. He’s a great business partner.”

Wherever Mrs. Davidson is, it isn’t with Nick. Her murmured yes is as much a dismissal as Nick thinks he’ll get. He bows his head and wishes her a goodnight. He doesn’t hear a reply.

;;

“Your ma is nice,” Nick tells George when he gets upstairs, finding the other sitting at his desk in his room. “Is it really not a problem? Me being here?”

George leans back in his chair, pushing himself away from the desk. “Yeah,” he finally says. “It’s not. We’ve got the space, anyway. You went three days without meeting my mum.”

“Not as much luck with your dad,” Nick says, and George laughs. When George pulls himself back into his desk, fiddling with the various knickknacks there before scratching his pencil across a notebook page, Nick wonders about what his parents said.

George talked about having friends—talks about having friends, even. He didn’t sound close to them, not really, didn’t even sound like he enjoyed having them, but he had them. Has them. Nick frowns, taking a seat at the foot of George’s bed before falling back onto the soft duvet. George doesn’t glance up from his writing.

“Are you going to see your friends at all?” he finally asks. “I mean, I know you said you don’t want to bother, but still….”

At that, George straightens, setting down his pencil and turning to look at Nick. “Anna and Blair are in Paris; Vince, Theo, and Gordon are back in the UK; Beth and Seraphina are in Switzerland. Everyone else is either away on summer internships or partying at South Beach.”

“And the people you named… are you close to them?” George sends him a look and Nick is quick to revise. “As close as you can be, I mean.”

“Sometimes,” George says before frowning. “Why? Do you want to stay at a hotel or something?”

“Stop acting like it’s the end of the world if I sleep in my truck,” is what Nick tells him first, and then, “and no. I was just curious. Before, you were by yourself, and now it feels like you’re always with me. I know you said you can’t really trust your friends, but you don’t even have plans with them.”

“It’s unconventional, yeah,” George says, turning back to his desk, “but it’s fine. I like what we’re doing at the market, and I like my friends in small doses. You, that exception.”

“Probably because I’m not someone that would leave you behind for South Beach,” Nick replies, and George allows a small laugh at that. Nick grins. “Alright,” he says, “I’m going to go get ready for bed. See you in the morning?”

George nods and lifts a hand in a wave. “See you in the morning.”

Right before shutting the door, Nick pauses. George does too. When they look at each other, Nick opens his mouth, words on the tip of his tongue, before he realizes he doesn’t even know what those words are. He shakes his head, closing the door quietly behind him.

;;

He’s practically forgotten about the conversation when George brings it up again. “My parents,” he begins, “what’d they tell you?”

Nick freezes. “Nothing,” he replies, slicing a liver, eyes locked on the organ. Can’t afford to mess up and all that.

“Sapnap,” George says. “They told you something.”

“They didn’t!” Nick bites his lip and squints, lining his knife up again. Really, he’s got to get this cut right. He does.

“Nick.”

He puts the knife down. “They just said that you don’t go outside much and that I help with that. It’s really not a big deal.”

“Nothing with my parents is ever not a big deal,” George sneers. “I can’t believe this. So what—I fucking hate my friends, what about it?”

“Nothing about it!” Nick tells him, packaging the sliced liver. “Really, I was just wondering if you really didn’t have any plans. I think this is something that’s not a big deal.”

“No, no,” George sinks to the floor, squatting, palms pressed over his eyes, “it is a big deal.”

Nick frowns, lowering himself to pull George’s hands away from his face. “Everyone likes a little alone time, and you’re, like, living in a pit of snakes. How is it a big deal?”

George glares at him. “Let’s just say it’s not a very good look when you’re inside all day, and when you’re not inside, your usually with girls that you aren’t having an affair with.”

“You’re a teenager; how the hell would you have an affair?”

“It’s the thought that counts,” George replies, flat. “I look fucking weird! To my parents and to all their stupid business partners! Especially here. We literally work with oil companies and ranchers, Sapnap.” He jerks his arms free of Nick’s grasp to cover his face again. “No wonder they stopped putting up a fuss about you—you make me look good! I’m actually working, getting work experience, and to have a friend like you, a real, rugged, gritty guy—oh my God.” He drags his hands down his face to look up at Nick. “That’s so dumb.”

“So I make you look like a man?” Nick asks, and then blinks, shaking his head. “Also, stopped… putting up a fuss? So they didn’t approve at first?”

“Of course they didn’t approve,” George hisses. “I never do stuff like that, what I did with you, they were—not terrified, but you know.” He widens his eyes, lips set in a stern frown. Nick nods, though he’s not sure he knows. George continues anyway, “It’s messy. Families are messy.”

“Yeah, they are,” Nick agrees, though his was always pretty neat. Oh well. “But it’s fine,” he tries a smile, though the frown doesn’t leave George’s face, “I didn’t think anything of it, and your parents are happy with you—I see no downsides.”

“It’s the principle, Sapnap,” George tells him, but finally, he gives a small smile too. “It’s fine.”

“Do you want to maybe get off the floor now?” Nick asks, and George nods.

They rise, and Nick clears his throat. “Uh, I don’t know how good that was for business.”

“Sorry,” George replies, “I don’t usually… do that.”

“I know,” Nick says. When he smiles, George smiles back, zero hesitation.

;;

The next day, George asks him how long he’s staying. Nick frowns down at his street tacos. “Until all the meat sells,” he says, “and then I’ll go home, get more meat, and stay until that sells out.”

“All summer?” George asks.

“All summer,” Nick replies.

George stares at a point past Nick’s shoulder. “Huh,” he says. “Well, you’ve been here a week. Are you going home soon?”

“Give it another week.”

George nods. “How many trips are you thinking?”

Nick shrugs.

“Do you think I could go with you on one?”

Again, Nick shrugs.

George narrows his eyes before huffing. “I want to see the ranch.”

“It’s got the animals you sell and grass,” Nick says. “What are you hoping for?”

“Consider it my South Beach,” George replies.

“Go to Galveston, then,” Nick retorts.

“Take me to Galveston, then.” When Nick looks across the table at him, George is serious.

Nick sighs. “Do you mean it?”

George doesn’t reply.

Another sigh. “Maybe. Can’t you drive?”

“My mom doesn’t want me to risk it,” George tells him, and the statement is so ridiculous it makes Nick choke on his next bite of taco. “What?” George asks, brows furrowing. “It’s true!”

Nick swallows as best he can before taking a drink of water. “I know,” he replies. “That’s what makes it so terrible.”

;;

#snf vermillion #georgenap #sapnotfound #snf #fic #fanfiction

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snarkwrites · 3 years

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02 | upside down; steve harrington

Notes:

I suck so bad. I meant to post these before I left to go on my little trip and life got hella busy. But, I didn't get around to it. BUT BUT.. I am now. They're not really that edited, so yeah. I was happy with what came out, despite this turning out to not be a slow burn type thing at all like I originally wanted. So for all those hoping for a slow burn, oopsies?

OH.. And before I forget, chapters one, two, three and potentially four take place BEFORE the actual series starts. ;P

Summary:

She moves back to Hawkins and manages to turn his life completely upside down. In the best of ways.

But how will everything play out between them? Also, can they handle all the weirdness ahead? We shall see.

Warnings:

LOOSE CANON COMPLIANCE AT BEST, TOTAL DEVIATION AT WORST - this is just an up front catch all because sometimes, things happen that I don’t particularly care for (the senseless death of Barb, anybody?) and if you’re one of those canon only people, this is here to warn you that this is not the fic for you. LANGUAGE, OCCASIONAL GORE, MONSTERS / FANTASY ELEMENTS, TEENAGE DRAMA AND SHENANIGANS - Obviously, teenagers are going to do stuff. They’re at that point in their life where not every decision they make is the best one. So if you’d rather skip over this kind of thing (teen drinking, fighting, etc) then yeah.. you’ve been warned. THIS IS NOT A SLOW BURN, I REPEAT NOT SLOW AT ALL / EVENTUAL FILTHY GOOD NESS - because lets be real.. we’re all wondering when we’re gonna drop the plot and get to the good stuff. When this chapter occurs, I will flair it with an M. In the meantime, if you’re not into slow burn or mutual pining, then you’re probably not going to care about this.

Other Parts

[ SOUNDTRACK | part one]

Other Stuff

[ FAQ - TAG LIST DOC ]

Tagging:

There’s nobody on my list yet but… If you wanna be tagged for this, tell me pls. It will make me overjoyed.

Throwing out a no pressure tag to @RAMPAGEWRITING and @TWISTNET as well as @CHASINGEVERYBREAKINGWAVE just because. No pressure though bbies!

TWO.

Monday came with no sign of Steve. Then Tuesday. By Wednesday, I felt like I was about to lose my mind. Still no sign of him.

It was now Thursday afternoon. And honestly, I’d put the whole thing out of my head. Started to convince myself that I’d been right about Steve Harrington and his intentions after all. Nana Ginger had gotten Jonathan to come and help out by bussing tables in the dining area for an hour or two so I could go over the books for her with no interruptions. When I caught sight of Steve’s silver BMW pulling into the parking lot, I was perched atop the counter in the gas station doing just that.

With Billy Idol blasting quietly from a little boombox nearby.

I raised a brow when instead of coming in like usual, Steve wandered around back. Out to where Nana's boyfriend Hank was working in bay 3 of the garage behind the place.

“Oh. Oh no. Steve, why the hell…” I muttered to myself. Sitting the ledger to the side as I tiptoed carefully to the door that lead out into the garage from the front of the buildings attached. I pressed my ear against it, trying to listen.

All I could really make out was Hank laughing out loud. And Steve asking what was so funny about what he’d apparently asked. Then Hank telling him verbatim, that he didn’t know if he could trust him as far as he could throw him while pointing out that he’d been a teenage boy once too and that he knew exactly where this was all heading.

My breath caught in my throat. I waited on Steve to offer some form of rebuttal. Seconds later, he finally did. “ You’re actually completely wrong about me, sir. With all due respect.”

“If you can get her to say yes to a date in the first place, kid, by all means. But if you hurt her, you’re not gonna have anywhere to hide. We clear, kid?” Hank said this as loud and as plain as day. Clearly enough I could hear it completely through the door separating the two areas.

Steve muttered something else I couldn’t quite hear and in a mad scramble that had Jonathan nearly doubling over in laughter, I was trying to perch myself back on top of the counter at the front of the gas station. Balancing the ledger on my lap. Trying to force myself to concentrate on running numbers.

My reading glasses started to slip down the bridge of my nose and swearing, I pushed them back up. Eventually taking them off to unfocus my eyes and give them a little relief from strain. Jonathan spoke up from nearby.

“Hear anything interesting just now, Jen?” he gave me a teasing smirk and I grumbled, playfully flipping him off as I gave a soft smile. I nodded. “Yeah. I guess I have to at least consider saying yes to Harrington’s constant asking me out. I mean… takes a brave guy to talk to Hank.”

“You’re definitely not wrong there.” Jonathan muttered, chuckling quietly. Digging around in the pocket of his apron and tossing me a cassette tape. Smirking. “I made it during the countdown last night.”

“Oh?” I turned the cassette over in my hands, smiling. “I’ll put it in right now, give it a listen while I’m doing the rest of the books. Hey, do you need somebody to give Will a lift to Mike’s on Saturday?”

“If you don’t mind?” Jonathan asked.

“Not at all.” I grinned, adding quickly, “I’m supposed to drop Dustin Henderson off there too. Figured since they’re going to the same place and I’m gonna hang out with Nancy for a while, why not?”

“Thank you.” Jonathan gave a grateful smile and an idea kind of formed. I smiled and mentioned casually, “Ya know, Jon.. If you really want to thank me.. You could talk to Nancy sometime.”

Jonathan eyed me with a raised brow. I held out his mixtape and added, “She loves The Clash.”

“Really?” his brow raised.

“Just take my word for it, Byers.”

“ You’re sure you don’t mind me giving her this?”

“Why would I? I told you to, silly.” I laughed, shaking my head. Jonathan was being called to the back dining area again by my Nana, so he hurried off and I stood, stretching. Slinking down the aisles of the gas station, over to a cooler.

I grabbed myself a Diet Pepsi and dug around in my pocket for the money to put in the register to cover it. Once I’d popped the top against the counter, I settled back on top of it, getting back to balancing the books.

I heard a throat clearing from the doors about ten minutes later. The smell of cheeseburger and french fries wafted straight to my nose, making me groan quietly as my eyes fixed on Steve and then promptly lowered to the grease stained brown paper bag he held in his hands as he grinned at me, nodding to the glasses perched on my nose.

“Fuck.” I scrambled to take them off. Steve stepped into the gas station completely, walking towards me. A teasing gleam in his eyes as he shook his head. Stopping on the other side of the counter, in front of me. “You don’t have to do that, Jennie. I’ve seen you wearing glasses before, remember? The red framed ones you had in kindergarten.”

I cringed, laughing a little. Leaning in slightly. Gazing at him almost helplessly as the bits of conversation I’d overheard between him and Hank out in the garage earlier replaying in my head.

Remembering that tonight, if he asked me on a date yet again, I was going to say yes. And not just because of some silly dare given to me by Barb and Nancy. Because I couldn’t keep fighting Steve Harrington off the way I had been if I wanted to, to begin with.

I was leaning closer where I sat. It occurred to me when Steve chuckled quietly. Stepping between my legs, the way they dangled over the counter on his side. He sat the grease stained paper bag to the side and he bit his lip, gazing up at me.

“Your grandma told me to come and drag you out of here. She told me to tell you not to worry about waiting the tables, she’s trying to help Jonathan get some extra cash on the side. She also said don’t argue.” Steve flashed me another one of those charmer grins and I swallowed hard. My mouth opened and closed for a second or two because I just couldn’t think of anything clever to say. Weird, because normally, I have plenty to say. Constantly.

Out of habit, my fingers drifted up to the dainty cursive nameplate that hung on the silver chain around my neck. I toyed with the lettering as I pretended to mull it over, just to be slightly difficult.

So I could feel better about giving in when I inevitably did.

“C’mon, Jennie.” Steve pleaded. Eyes locked on mine. Gaze dropping briefly to my lips and lingering there just long enough that I could feel my breath when it caught in my throat.

I finally managed to get my mouth and brain working in tandem and licking my lips as I gazed at him, I muttered quietly, “It’s Jen.”

“Maybe I like Jennie better.” Steve leaned in just a little. A teasing gleam in his eye and a flirty tone to his voice as it dropped lower. Quieter.

And when Hank’s throat cleared from the door between the garage and the front of the building, I wanted to puddle into a pile of goo in the linoleum tile.

“Interruptin somethin, Jaybird?” he asked the question so casually.

Steve looked like a deer in headlights. He pulled away just a little and despite myself, I pouted.

Satisfied that he’d interrupted things between Steve and I, Hank smirked a little, dragging an oil stained hand over shaggy brown and gray hair. Gazing at us both. Giving Steve that universal gesture that clearly spelled out “I’m watching you, kid.” before going to a cooler to grab himself a six pack of beer, counting out the correct change in bills and coins and handing them to me.

I grabbed hold of Hank’s hand. “Nana is gonna have a fit. I know that’s not super glue I see holdin skin together, sir.”

“It is, Jaybird. Because if I don’t get that damned Chrysler off my lift, I’m gonna burn her to the ground.”

“Oh Hank.” I shook my head, clucking my tongue at him. Digging around for antiseptic and a bandage, holding it out to him expectantly as he withdrew his hand. He chuckled and shook his head. “It’ll be fine, kid.” he waved away the antiseptic and the bandage and made his way into the garage area again, making me shake my head.

Taking the time to pull myself together decently enough that I wasn’t a stammering mess when I glanced at Steve again.

“C’mon. Please?” he asked again.

I tapped my chin, pretending to think about it. Slipping off the counter. By this time, he’d stepped in close all over again, so me slipping off the counter had us body to body. His hand settled in the curve of my hip and I barely restrained a gasp.

“Okay. Alright. I’ll leave with you.”

He grinned brightly. Holding the door open for me after I clocked out and placed my timecard in the slot with my name on it. I ducked my head into the dining area and my Nana’s only response was to smirk and wink at me. Shooing me out of the diner.

“Get her outta my hair, kid!” my Nana smiled as she called out to Steve, who was standing right behind me. His hand at my lower back. The second I realized this, I could feel myself burning up all over. Just the simplest touch.. Felt comforting. Intimate. And me, being of dirty mind, well.. Me and my dirty mind, we took that and ran.

Jesus Christ, of all the times for my hormones to manifest, it’s now? When I’m trying to break 2 prior generations of questionable romantic choices? I wanted to shake my head at myself. I reminded myself calmly that just because my Nana and my mom did the things they did, that didn’t mean I had to cave in and repeat. I am my own person, after all. And apparently right now, that person is giddy with… Thoughts.

“Gladly, ma’am!” Steve called back, laughing.

He pushed open the door and we stepped outside. When he opened the passenger door, I sank down into the seat, leaning back against it a little. Steve wandered around to the driver side, getting into the car. Starting it.

“Where are you taking me?”

He chuckled. “ I think you’ll like it.”

“Steve.” I pouted, “A hint?”

“It’s outside.” was literally all he’d tell me.

“Well that really narrows it down.” I teased with a laugh.

He parked at this old park we all used to play at after school. Just as the sun was starting to go down.

We got out, wandering over to an old picnic table. Sitting on top of it, digging around in the bag for our food.

“So.. That dumb carnival is this weekend. Starts tomorrow night, I think.” Steve hinted after a few minutes. I nodded to where carnival workers were already setting up a midway a few feet away from us. Taking a bite of my burger, I mentioned casually, “I thought about going. But Nancy’s grounded again and Barb’s got that date with some guy Logan.”

“You could go with me.” Steve chuckled as he said it.

I smiled, taking another bite. “I could.”

“Would you?” he asked a few seconds later. Adding quickly, “Tonight isn’t a real date. Tomorrow. That would be.” flashing me that charmer smirk.

I nodded. Smiling as I spoke up. “ Yeah. I will. Hey… since I don’t have to go back to the diner…” before trailing off and gazing down at my legs . Reminding myself to have boundaries and restraint. But all the mental reminders in the world just weren’t cutting it. At all.

He reached out, curling his fingers beneath my chin. Making me look up at him. “What were you going to say, Jennie? You can tell me.” he coaxed. Biting his lip as he gazed at me intently.

“I was going to ask if you wanted to go swimming with me. There’s this little place out by my Nana’s out in the woods I go to swim…” I gave a soft laugh. I had to laugh at myself, it was pretty much all I could do.

Look at me. Going overboard.

“Yeah.” he nodded, smiling. We finished our food, and after, we wound up driving around a little. And about an hour later found us walking through the woods. Well, he was walking, glancing around warily, swatting at spider webs that he almost walked into a time or two and I had hold of his hand, practically dragging the poor guy.

We stepped out onto the sandy bank and he chuckled. Dragging his hand through his hair as he gazed down at me. “We don’t have suits or towels.” he mused, stepping closer to me. Staring me down all over again. I could feel my breath as it caught in my throat because if you want me to be honest?

I hadn’t thought this through properly. And was now freaking out silently. Just a little bit.

But I did my best to shove that out of my head and play it cool and calm. I went for turning it around on him, hoping to fluster him like his observation had flustered me just now.

“I know Mr. Lady Killer’s not worried about somebody seeing him in his Calvins.” I teased, sticking my tongue out at him. He chuckled. Going for his shirt, tugging it over his head. Letting it settle on a branch nearby without tearing his eyes off me for a single second as he did it.

“Did that look worried to you, Jennie?” he muttered, stepping closer. His hand at my hip as he gazed down at me. Waiting.

I cleared my throat, gesturing for him to turn around. He did, but as he did so, he joked that I was the one who was worried. Which to me, sounded like a challenge. So I tapped his shoulder so he’d turn around after lowering my shirt.

He eyed me, a brow raised.

“Challenging me, Steve?” I questioned, giving him an amused laugh as I reached down, tugging my shirt up and over my head. Letting it settle on the branch next to his polo shirt.

Steve sucked in a sharp breath and muttered something to himself, closing the distance between us. His hand settled on my hip again and he laughed quietly. Leaning down a little bit so that we were face to face, his forehead against mine and one of his hands cradling my face.

My heart was pounding. Hard and fast. So fast that I thought it might break out of my chest. I went to lick my own lips and my tongue brushed against his mouth. His fingers dug into my hip lightly and he muttered huskily, “ I see you still can’t turn down a dare, Jennie.” only half teasing. I shrugged, biting my lip as I gazed up at him. Trailing my fingers over his chest mostly just so I could ignore the way my hands were shaking and I was wet, getting wetter by the second. I glanced over my shoulder and nodded at the water. “If we’re going to swim, we should get in.”

Steve cleared his throat, nodding hastily. Stepping away, bending to tug off his sneakers and nearly tumbling over in the process. Making me giggle softly as I pulled off my boots. When my pocketknife and my mom’s old lighter fell out, he eyed me and then nodded to the items on the ground.

“A knife?”

“A girl’s gotta be prepared.” I shrugged it off. Steve tugged down his jeans and while I told myself I wasn’t going to peek or stare, I wound up failing at this miserably and got so distracted watching him that he was able to turn around my own words on me as soon as he kicked his jeans free at the ankle.

“If we’re going to swim, Jennie… we should get in.” he gave me a playful smirk as he said it, stepping closer all over again.

My hand shook as I lowered it to the button on my cut offs. As soon as I’d shed those, I took off for the water full speed. Nearly tripping on a stump in the hill leading down to the water. Steve’s arms shot out and he caught me, pulling me back upright. Pulling me hard enough that when he did, I found myself pressed against him completely.

He chuckled quietly, raising a hand. Pulling a leaf free from my hair.

“The water’s not going anywhere, Jennie.”

“I know.” I answered, my breath catching in my throat when our mouths brushed against each other’s just a little more with each word spoken. His fingers dug into my hip a little more and he took a shaky breath, asking the question quietly, “If I kissed you right now…”

My heart was hammering away in my chest but I managed to answer, “I dare you, Steve...No… I triple dare you.”. The hand he’d placed on my hip was tangled in the hair at the back of my head, pulling my mouth all the way against his mouth. His tongue swept out, outlining and then parting my lips. Massaging my tongue. Slow. Deep. Savoring the moment, even after we both clearly started to get light-headed from lack of actual oxygen. His hand moved up and down my body, settling on my lower back. Pulling me up to tiptoe slightly. The kiss broke long enough for both of us to properly breathe and then his mouth found mine again.

When it finally broke completely, Steve dragged the back of his hand over his mouth. Taking a few deep breaths. “Yeah.” he chuckled to himself.

I raised a brow. “Hm?”

“That was exactly how I thought it’d feel.” he mused, adding quietly, “Wow.”

My stomach churned and I tensed up a little. He chuckled, shaking his head. Placing his lips against my forehead. “It’s not a bad thing. Not at all. I mean.. It wasn’t for me?” he was the one who looked anxious now.

I muttered quietly, “ I definitely wouldn’t mind a repeat. A few repeats, actually, if I’m being honest.” while still quietly reeling from the intensity of it all. Melting myself against him, my fingers dancing slow over his chest. He sucked in a breath, catching hold of my hand. Tilting my chin so that I had to look up at him.

“You’re blushing.” Steve was teasing gently. Rolling his thumb over my bottom lip, leaving it quivering.

“I’m not!” I pretended to be offended by what he said, pouting a little. But I knew I was, I could feel my cheeks burning hot. I stepped away and turned my back, taking off at a run down the hill. Hitting the cool water with a loud and obnoxious splash. Steve dove in behind me, swimming over. Surfacing behind me and pressing against me from behind. I turned to face him and when he splashed me and dove out of the way, I sent up an obnoxious spray of water in his direction, making him yelp because he hadn’t been expecting it.

After about an hour of swimming around and walking the creek down further, we made our way back up to the bank, flopping onto the sand.

My restraint was well out the window by now. If I even thought for a second I was going to fight off the magnetic pull I felt to Steve, I was mistaken and I knew that now. I settled my head on his shoulder and he looped an arm around me, and we lounged around lazily, watching the sky get darker and darker.

Talking. A lot.

I realized that it had to be getting late and I sprang up, holding out my hand. Steve grabbed hold, pulling himself up. After we’d gotten redressed, we wandered up the hill and out of the woods, over to where he’d parked his car at the end of my nana’s driveway..

When he went to walk me up to my front door, we wound up body to body. My arms raised, settling around his neck. My back met the front door and he pulled me into another long and drawn out deep kiss that had us both breathless when it broke.

“Kind of don’t want tonight to end.” he admitted as he gazed down at me. I nodded, definitely agreeing. “Me either.” I admitted quietly, muttering the words against his lips. The porch light started to flicker like crazy and I smiled into the kiss, wiping my mouth as I finally managed to pull away.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, right?” Steve asked, reminding me that I’d agreed to go to the carnival in town with him. I smiled and nodded. Pausing in the doorway of my grandmother’s house to steal another quick kiss before finally making myself go inside.

I leaned against the door, pulling myself together and my Nana called out from the kitchen, “Well? How did it go, Jennie Bird?”

I wandered into the kitchen, sinking down in a chair at her kitchen table. Smirking at her as all I did to answer her endless stream of questions was to shrug.

“You’re no fun, girl. No fun at all. I wanted to hear juicy details.” my nana reached out, pulling a leaf from my wet hair, holding it at me, smirking as she did so. “Any reason you’re all wet and dazed, bringing half the forest up in my house?”

“We went for a swim down at the creek.”

“Mhm.” my nana teased, laughing softly. “I know you’ll use your head. God knows one of us Brown women needs to, neither me or your mama, god rest her, could ever manage it.” she nodded to the phone on the wall by the doorway. “Might wanna call Nan and Barb. They’ve been calling all afternoon, wondering where you were. They both told me tell you they wanted full details.”

“No listening from upstairs, Nana.” I teased as she shrugged. “Makin no promises, Jennie Bird. You know me. I’m a nosy old broad.”

I grabbed the phone and managed to make the cord stretch to the living room, where I sprawled out on the old couch, legs over the back, telling Nancy and then Barb everything that happened that afternoon.

At one point, while I was talking to Nancy, I smiled to myself when she went into a good ten minutes of gushing over Jonathan walking her home from the library earlier. And giving her a mixed tape.

To be fair, it’s about time he finally talked to her. I was beginning to wonder if I’d have to shove them both in a closet and walk away.

“So… how’d it go with you and Steve tonight?”

“So many sparks.” I gave a dreamy sigh as I spoke, making Nancy laugh. Toying with the necklace and smiling softly to myself as I continued, “ Between you and me? I needed the dip in the cold water…”

“You went swimming?”

“Mhm.” I answered, taking a deep breath. “He’s taking me to the carnival downtown tomorrow night.”

“Oh my god. Get out. Really?” Nancy laughed.

I rolled onto my stomach, twisting the phone cord around my fingertip. Laughing softly as I explained exactly what transpired when Steve showed up at the diner earlier. By the end of it, Nancy let out a low whistle. “He really sacrificed himself to Hank.”

“Mhm. Left me with no option but to say yes. We know how my nana’s boyfriend is. It takes… a brave one to even attempt that.”

“Confession… I may or may not be meeting Jonathan at the carnival tomorrow night too. And Barb mentioned earlier that she’s going to come to it after the movie ends over at the theater, with Logan.”

“Group date?” I asked, giving a giggle. Raking my fingers through my hair as I reached for the Diet Tab I’d gotten myself before grabbing the phone, taking a sip of it.

“Yes. Group date indeed.” Nancy answered. I could hear her mother yelling at her to hang up, and I let her go, calling Barb.

“Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, you are not going to believe what happened to me this afternoon, Barb.”

“Your nana told us you left with Steve earlier. How’d that go?” Barb asked in a teasing tone. “I told you he liked you, you realize this, right?” she added.

“All I’m saying is I needed that swim to cool me down. I needed it badly.” I giggled. Agreeing reluctantly when she reminded me that she’d been telling me he liked me all month long. I rolled onto my back, twisting the cord around my fingers again. “Hey, are you and Logan gonna stop by the carnival after your movie?”

“Yeah! Did Nancy tell you? I told her to tell you so we could all meet up or something.”

“I am dying for funnel cake. And maybe getting stuck at the top of the Ferris Wheel like some cliche romance novel…” I muttered, giving a soft laugh at the end.

“Aww how cute!” Barb teased.

I took a few more sips of my diet Tab and smiled to myself. Excited about tomorrow night. Barb spoke up again, “Wait… you said you and Steve went swimming…”

“We did.”

“What was that like?”

“Oh, it was interesting. Very,very interesting.”

“You’re no fun girl!” my Nana’s voice cut through the call and I groaned inwardly, lowering the phone to call up the stairs to my Nana in her room, “Seriously?”

Barb was laughing. After my nana hung up, we talked a little more and I told her about Steve going out to the garage. WIth all the tools. And my nana’s boyfriend Hank… to ask him if he could take me on a date.

“He did? And he’s alive? How?”

“I don’t know, actually. Hank’s always giving him shit when he comes into the diner, I did not see it going the way it did. But.. I’m glad it did. Ah, I had such a good time tonight.”

“He’d better be good to you or I’m coming for his knee caps.” Barb teased, going quiet for a few seconds. Her mom must have come to her door to tell her she needed to use the phone, because she had to get off. After I ended the call with her, I wandered up to my room, falling across my bed.

What.A.Night.

#steve harrington fanfiction #steve harrington fanfic #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington fic #steve harrington imagines #my writing ; steve harrington #my fics ; steve harrington #my fanfics ; steve harrington

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kareofbears · 4 years

Text

desperate as that sounds

Five times Ryuji ran for Akira (and one time he ran for himself.)

—

read on ao3 or below the cut :)

It’s 4:45 am with the weather sitting at a brutal -3 degrees when Ryuji really starts wishing that he brought another jacket.

People are lined around Akihabara by the hundreds outside of closed electronic stores, and the sun has yet to even rise. Some people are yawning, some are clutching their rapidly cooling coffee in a death grip, and most have dark, purple bags underneath their eyes—proof of the battle scars that they’ve acquired. Every person here had the same goal in mind: To get what they need and get out as quick as possible.

As it turns out, if everyone has that same mindset, it creates the violent, yearly November tradition that is Black Friday.

Glancing around, he notices that people came in packs, teams. Teenagers and pre-pubescent kids are all scuffling around, hyping themselves up and creating strategies for the war to come. The more seasoned veterans of the yearly massacre came in pairs—the smaller the group, the faster you move, the move land you cover.

At the biggest electronic store in a region that’s already been nicknamed ‘Electronic Town,’ he is fourth in line—an impressive feat, especially for a first-timer. But it came with a heavy toll: he is completely and utterly alone.

”Skull, do you read me?”

Well, physically alone, anyway.

“Loud and clear,” he replies, readjusting the mic in his ear. “Not that I mind, but what’s with the codenames?”

Futaba scoffs. “You think Black Friday is just about the physical aspect? Foolish boy—the psychological aspects are half the battle. If I get you into the mindset that we’re in a Palace, then you’ll get into infiltration mode, and you’ll be OP compared to the nerds out there.”

“Ooo, I like it! Your brain is effin’ galaxy sized!”

“I do what I can for my faithful pack mule.”

“I’ll try not to take that personally.”

His deal with Futaba had been a simple one. She helps Ryuji navigate the horrors of Akihabara during Black Friday in exchange that he acts as what is essentially a drug trafficker sans the drugs. Despite her rigorous societal training she’d undergone with the Thieves, something about entering a borderline stampede still seems somewhat unappealing to her. Besides, he doesn’t mind. He’d always wanted to do something nice for Futaba anyway, and the store that has her computer thing is the same store that holds what he needs.

”Five minutes to go,” her voice crackles into his ear. ”Infiltration route—go!”

Their deal had also come in with an intense tutorial session that ended up lasting until one in the morning. “Floor 4, down 3 aisles, 8 steps in, turn right, second shelf, grab a box that says ‘GTX graphics card.’ Pink, if possible.”

“A+, Skull! You know, if you can memorize that, I seriously don’t get why you’re failing English verbs.”

“Please, this is actually important.”

Futaba cackles. “Now you’re speaking my language. With your legs and my navigation, this’ll basically be a Tuesday afternoon in Leblanc.”

People around him are starting to straighten up, some going as far as to remove the extra layer of clothing and shoving it in backpacks for maximum speed and minimum restrictions. “Damn, people here look more intense than some dudes in my track meets.”

“If you’re throwing out portable chargers with 30-hour battery life for only 800 yen, you’d be a little intense too.”

Ryuji scoffs and begins to stretch, being extra sure to get his right thigh. “I’m plenty intense. Just last Saturday, I almost beat the Big Bang Burger challenge.”

“Pretty sure Akira beat that on his second week in Tokyo. You know, you still haven’t told me why you’re bothering with this whole Black Friday mess. I didn’t peg you for an electronics type of guy, and your phone is as crappy as your posture.”

“Rude! But I can’t argue with that.” He starts to run in place, and for a brief second, he wonders if he should’ve packed a protein shake.

“Well, too late now. If your thing sells out because you didn’t want to give your Navi information, that’s on you.”

“Gimme some credit, Futaba,” an employee who looks equal parts sleep-deprived and terrified approaches the glass doors. “Ain’t no way in hell I’m failing either of us this morning.”

The glass slides open, and as if sunlight was released from the captivity of the clouds, or perhaps a meteor just broke through the earth’s atmosphere, the people start pushing, shoving, and flooding inside. The crowd looked both impenetrable and unwavering; an unstoppable force and an immovable object rolled into one giant stream of desperate shoppers.

Ryuji spares a split-second to crack his neck. Mission Start.

The moment he breaks through the initial threshold, people who were only one step behind him suddenly became ten, twenty, thirty. Weaving through crowds and aisles with the precision of a seamstress, Ryuji evades it all with ease.

”Skull, status report.”

“Smooth sailing, Oracle!” He ducks as an overly buff businessman turns around with a 3-metre pole used for studio lighting threatens to bash his head in. “You’re totally right about the codenames, by the way. It’s almost like I’ve got Captain with me.”

“Right?” She laughs. “It’s all about the mindset.”

Ryuji turns, and finally gets to the stairs—the most brutal section and the biggest gamble. It’s the reason why it was essential that he’s one of the first in line. Once the stairs get jammed with people, it’s game over. Making a mad dash up four flights of stars, he thanks any God that may be that Palaces are fantastic for rehab.

He makes it to the top, panting. It’s empty, save for a few nervous-looking employees. He hopes the smile he throws their way came off as ‘pleasant and grateful for their service’ rather than ‘a delinquent asshole who might steal loads of shit.’

“Down 3 aisles, 8 steps,” he mutters to himself as he quickly scans the fourth floor. “Turn right, second shelf,” eyes landing on his target, he grins. “I effin’ rock.”

”You got it?”

“Of course I did!” He fist pumps before swiping the box. In his excitement, he nearly runs over to give a random employee a high-five. “Alright Oracle, you’re up.”

”I love you so much in a non-weird way. Okay,” he hears the clacking of keys on the other side of the mic. “What do you need?”

“Two words: game console.”

The clacking stops. “You’re joking.”

Ryuji snorts. “I ain’t waking up at 3 in the morning for a joke.”

”Those are hard enough to get as is, and on a day like this—”

“So you can’t do it?”

In the same way every one of the thieves know they could bait Ryuji with a few choice words, it’s a lesser-known fact that Futaba is quite nearly as bad when it comes to open defiance. “Jerk. Of course I can.”

“Then let’s do it!”

“Ugh, fine!” The clacking resumes, more vigorously. “Yikes, only 3 left. Make it quick!”

“Got it,” he replies. He turns around and his stomach drops as he sees people rushing in. “What floor?”

“Third.”

Ryuji groans. The stairs, with people packed in like sardines, are a circus. It would take at least two minutes to try and go down a single flight of stairs. The elevator is even worse, and he honestly wouldn’t be surprised if it had already started to malfunction. Only one choice, then.

He takes a deep breath. “Pray for me.”

”Godspeed, soldier.”

Ryuji, like a wild animal on the loose in the streets of Tokyo, jumps on the handrails and begins his descent that way, begging to the skies that he doesn’t slip and create a domino effect that knocks down a dozen people.

In thirty seconds flat (with no small amount of cursing from both the customers and himself) he jumps off and lands (tumbles) onto the third floor, grinning triumphantly. Eat your heart out, Sumire.

“Oracle, I’m here. Almost broke my ankles. Where to?”

”Straight ahead,” she replies. ”Only one left, though. Better make it quick.”

His eyes land on the last game console, and he sees someone making their way towards it. “Not a problem.”

Ryuji sprints.

Throwing every societal rule and common courtesy into the air, he makes a mad dash and, somehow, miraculously does not bump into anyone or knock down any huge shelves.

In approximately 3 seconds, he grabs his treasure and yells a very loud but completely genuine “sorry!” over his shoulder as he half runs back to the stairs, face red for multiple reasons.

Delving back into the sea of the crowd, trying to navigate himself to the cash register, he sighs. “I’m going to hell.”

”Mission success, then?”

“I had to steal it from some guy! I feel so bad. What if he’s like, buying it for his long lost son or something?”

”Whatever! That’s just part of the Black Friday spirit. Congrats! At least you finally got a game console.”

“Huh? Oh, I already had one.”

Static crinkles in his ear, before, ”WHAT!?”

“Ow! Don’t yell!”

”You already had one and you still did this shopping run?”

“Yeah…?”

”Why?! Are you gonna sell it? Are you one of those sleazy men who take advantage of the good will of gamers, Sakamoto?”

“Hell no!”

”So—“

“Oops, almost at the front of the cash register. I’ll drop off the goods at Akira’s. Talk to you later, shortie.”

Click.

”Wha— Hey! Ryuji!” Silence. “Ugh!”

————

After a much-deserved nap, Futaba climbs up the stairs to Akira’s attic.

“The star has arrived!” she says in lieu of a greeting. “Where’s Ryuji?”

“He left,” Akira answers. He’s looking at something on his worktable. “Your stuff is on the bed.”

Futaba whoops and snatches up the little plastic bag. Peering inside, she sees an adorable GTX hot pink graphics card, and a note. In a horrific scrawl, it writes: dont tell him plz ;)))

She looks up quizzically when her eyes land on Akira’s desk: A shiny new game console.

“Um…”

“Hmm?” he looks up. “Oh, Ryuji dropped it off. Said his mom won it at work, and since he already had one, he gave it to me. Nice, right?”

She opens her mouth, before closing it with a clack. Just two weeks ago, Ryuji had asked Akira in the group chat if they could play video games at his place. Sometimes, it’s easy to forget about Akira’s situation: false accusation, an attic for a room, no definitive meals, not even a proper bathroom in the building, but Akira plays it off like it’s easy. He answered by making a joke that he’s too poor for something like that when you can buy faux battle axes and realistic shotguns instead. Everyone had forgotten about that interaction.

But apparently, Ryuji hadn’t.

He’s an idiot, Futaba thinks. To which boy she’s referring to, she’s not sure.

“Yeah,” is what she says instead. “It’s nice.”

====

The dust motes flying around the attic of Leblanc are lovely. Swirling in senseless formations, floating through the still air like snow. The way none of them collide with each other, as if they have some sort of motion detector that tells them to move out of the way. It’s pleasing to look at.

It’s a shame Ryuji doesn’t give a single shit about them at this moment.

He’s sitting on Akira’s bed, back pressed against the window sill with his hair tipped up, staring unfocused at the wooden beams, eyes glazed over. He’s been like this for the better part of the day, and now the evening is slipping by him. Time continues ticking on like a rigged bomb; an ongoing reminder of how many seconds he’s losing, and how much more he can lose.

He’s considered moving. To walk around the room, shift the dust that’s surely settled on him. Getting up, stretching his legs, outwardly expelling some of his trapped, balled up energy is a good idea. Healthy, even, if those shitty YouTube videos he’s watched on his phone about anger management were on to something. But he can’t. He shouldn’t.

Amidst all the uncertainty and the wound-up anxiety that has currently made permanent residence deep inside his core, he knows that if lets his joints unlock, he’s going to fucking lose it.

Slam a fist inside the dry wood, tear up a blanket, throw the adorable ramen bowl he gave Akira against the wall until it shatters into a hundred pieces. He’s so terrified of ruining this room that he won’t even give himself the option. And Ryuji would rather let hell freeze over than scare Futaba again in his fit of fucked-up rage that comes with the package that is Sakamoto Ryuji.

So he’s stuck on the bed for God knows how long.

Footsteps come up, and he doesn’t need to look down to know who’s going to chew him out. If it’s not Akira that’s going to chide him out of his stupor (which it isn’t, even though Ryuji would do anything if it means that Akira’s back here with them), then they’d send in someone who’d drag him out of it with her nails perfectly manicured.

“You look terrible.”

“Screw off,” Ryuji spits automatically, and he cringes inwardly. Ann doesn’t deserve the sharp end of his horrible mood. It’s not her fault that it feels like his insides feel like they’re trying to eat their way out.

She ignores him and moves to hop on top of the old work desk. The wood creaks underneath her. “You’ve been here all day.”

“I know.”

“Did you sleep last night?”

“Yes. No.” He feels Ann’s stare burn into the side of his face—a ghost of Carmen’s presence. “I don’t know.”

“He wouldn’t want to see you like this.”

Irritation swells in him. She’s never learned to take a hint in her life. “Really? Are you seriously saying that?”

“Are you saying he would?”

“I’m saying he’s too busy having the living shit beat out of him to see me like this.”

His body twitches, and that’s all he needed for his resolve to break down. He jumps from the bed, feet landing heavily enough that he’s sure they can all hear him from the floor below. Unconsciously, his feet pace around the small room; quick with agitation but heavy with dread. Anything to distract from doing something stupid.

“You’re worried about me, what, not sleeping? For lying down on this damn bed for too long? Screw that. Akira’s being grilled like cheap meat for the past couple of days and you’re expecting me to act normal about it? That’s bullshit.”

Bad. This is bad. His fingers are already curling in his fists, eager and all too willing to be used. He settles for balling the edge of his shirt instead.

“He isn’t here. That’s the fact, isn’t it? And what the fuck am I doing about it? Freaking out? Trying not to throw a tantrum about it like some kind of stupid kid? Am I really this messed in the head that everyone on the team is—-is hiding from me like I’m some kind of—” he cuts himself off.

Delinquent.

Ryuji takes a deep breath, fully inhaling and slowly exhaling. He focuses on the dust motes again. In and out. Countdown from ten. He can do this. He can get a grip on himself. Thank God it was Ann that came up—if it had been anyone else, he doesn’t think he can put his pride aside as easily. (Unless it was Futaba. God, he loves her so much.)

For a while, it was silent except for his breathing; it stuttered occasionally, but eventually it evens out. Ann only watches from her perch.

When he feels stable enough, Ryuji drops to sit on the hardwood.

“Okay?” she asks. Ann never babies him when he gets like this—she’s good that way.

“Okay.” And he really is. Not completely, of course not. His nerves weren’t strung as tight, but he still feels a heavy weight right in his stomach.

She hops off the desk and goes to sit in front of him on the floor. Crossing her legs, Ann waits. They regard each other for a long minute.

“He’s the toughest guy I’ve ever met,” he says. It feels weird saying this out loud, instead of repeating the mantra in his head like a broken record. “If anyone can handle this, it’s Akira.”

She rolls her eyes. “Duh.”

“He’s going to be okay.”

“I know that.”

“Sooner than later, his dumb ass is going to be walking through the door downstairs.”

“You bet he is.”

“And I get to yell at him as much as I want.”

“Get in line.”

“I’m not going to lose him tonight.”

Ann reaches over—slowly, giving him plenty of room to shift away—and places a hand on his knee. “You’re not going to lose him tonight.”

Ryuji laughs, a little breathy but still genuine. He prods at her hand. “When’d you get so good with me, Takamaki?”

“I do the Lord’s work around here, free of charge.” She grins, before her tone drops again. “Can you do something for me, though?”

“Lay it on me.”

Ann pulls back and leans on a propped hand, her blue eyes piercing. “When Akira comes back, and he will—”

“And he will. No doubt about it.”

“Obviously. He’s the best person for this. But when Akira comes back, he’s…” Ann gnaws on the inside of her cheek. “He’s not going to be okay, Ryuji.”

Somewhere in his mind, he already knew what she was going to say. While the biggest of his worries is that he’d never see Akira walk through the doors of Leblanc again, there was a quieter fear. A very specific fear, one that Ryuji knows all too well. Because stories don’t just end at the climax of a single event—they keep going. It’s the fear of what happens once he does see Akira.

The aftermath.

The bell chimes downstairs.

His heart lurches, and he makes the briefest of eye contact with Ann before he’s gone.

He’s the toughest guy I’ve ever met.

It’s like his feet have a mind of their own.

If anyone can handle this, it’s Akira.

In an instant, he’s scrambling towards the stairs on all fours before pushing himself up.

Sooner than later, his dumbass is going to be walking through the door downstairs.

His hand finds its hold on the old wooden railing as he sprints his way down. More than once, he almost trips and bangs his head into the wall.

And I get to yell at him as much as I want.

Rounding the corner, he jumps on the landing, ignoring the sharp pain that shoots up his thigh. He ignores the stares from everyone else. Looking up his breath catches in his throat. Gray eyes meet his brown ones. He takes one step forward, and then another. And then he sprints the rest.

He’s going to be okay.

Ryuji stops himself right in front of him, an arms-length away. Akira’s face looked like it’s been through hell and back. Split lip, black eye, bruised cheekbone. An intense fury flares up his spine when he sees the grime and dirt up along his temple.

He hesitates.

As much as he wants to reach forward, close the gap, to make sure that this boy that he can’t afford to lose is real… he can’t do it.

Because he knows what would happen if he tries to cross a boundary that isn’t ready to be crossed—he might not be ready. Ryuji could hurt him by touching any injuries he doesn’t know about (God, how much more is he hiding in there? He’s this close to either throwing up or throwing a punch). But what he’s most scared about, what he’s terrified of doing, is touching Akira in the state of mind he’s in right now. For someone to grip him, grab him, even just brush past him right now, it might be too much. Judging by how beat up he looks just from his face? That does shit to people. That changes you.

Ryuji would know. So he keeps his distance.

Akira’s eyes turn dark, and for a second, Ryuji is terrified that he must’ve overstepped a boundary.

Then he throws his arms around Ryuji, the force knocking them both back by a couple of steps.

“Akira?” he asks, bewildered. Never in their friendship has he seen Akira act like this. It sends alarm bells ringing through his head. “What—”

“Don’t,” Akira cuts off, voice hoarse and quiet, so quiet that even this close, Ryuji is straining to hear him. The arms around him tighten. “Don’t be like that. Please. I can’t. Not right now, Ryuji.”

It hits him all at once. And in his sixteen years of living, Ryuji doesn’t think he’s ever been stupider.

Akira’s been trapped in an interrogation room with nothing but a bunch of make-believe police officers. He got the shit beat out of him, had to stage his own suicide.

And Ryuji just tried to push him away.

He lets his arms wrap around Akira tightly; not too tight, but enough to make sure he won’t slip away from him again. (Never again. Not if he can help it.)

“I’m glad you’re back,” he whispers. Tilting his head up, he stares at the soft lighting of Leblanc, forcing his lungs to breathe evenly—not for fear of losing his temper, but for fear of exposing the tears silently streaming down his face. “So fucking glad.”

Akira doesn’t answer. He only buries his face deeper into Ryuji’s shoulder.

Ann was right—Akira isn’t okay. Not for now, not for awhile. It’s up to Ryuji and everyone else in their group of friends to fix that. That’s fine. They’ll all take as long as they need. He isn’t okay right now, but he will be. They can work on that.

But one thing was clear.

I’m not going to lose him tonight.

====

Summer in Mementos is pretty gross.

Granted, it’s always nasty in here—there’s a perpetual air of moisture, like the inside of a whale, if Ryuji had ever been in one (he’s basing that off of an American movie Ann showed them last week; he didn’t even know it was possible for a fish to get lost in the ocean). There’s also the ongoing sound of trains passing by them on loop, and to him, trains are just inherently cramped and humid and always too sticky for his liking.

Of course, there’s the disgusting, weird amalgamated Shadows that litter every level of Mementos. At least in Palaces they sort of resemble something from the real world, but he guesses they didn’t even bother with these ones. The worst part of all this is that right now, it’s hot, but not hot enough for the Shadows to process a heat wave.

So essentially, they’re fighting with additional bucket loads of sweat, but with none of the usual reward that comes with it.

Well, not that they needed it.

“Fox.”

“As you wish.”

Yusuke’s boots skid to a halt as he points his katana at the fast-moving Shadow, the tip perfectly still. “Your assistance, Goemon.”

They’re on their weekly Mementos grind, the list Mishima keeps updating finally too long to ignore. (Akira hates it when things pile up. It’s a big reason why Ryuji hastily cleaned up every time he wanted to come over. Now though, he doesn’t even bother.)

The current All-Star team includes Yusuke, Makoto, Ryuji, and Akira, with the rest of them keeping a close eye in case they need a quick shift in strategy.

From his katana, black ice crawls in the ground beneath rusted train tracks, the air suddenly chilly despite the humidity that was there a moment ago. Frost shoots forward, encasing the legs of the Shadow only to shatter with a strong jerk forward. It roars, the ear-piercing sound causing the scattered debris around them to vibrate. Akira clicks his tongue.

Strong against ice. Easy fix. Ryuji mouths the words along with Akira when he says, “Panther, you’re up.”

“Finally!”

Ann darts in, high-fiving Yusuke as he rushes out. Ryuji can see Makoto pat Yusuke on the back, sympathy etched on her expression and Futaba mussing his hair. He always took it the hardest when he had to be switched out.

Akira’s gloved fingers brush the edge of his monochrome mask. “Come, Principality.”

As if a human version of justice has been summoned down to earth, the winged statue floats for a moment, eyes filled with scorn as she casts a simple, yet effective memory loss spell. The Shadow shakes its head aggressively. It works, but it won’t hold for long.

“Skull.”

“Don’t mind if I do!”

He grins and sprints right, squeezing into the Shadow’s blindside. It tries to twist around to take a swipe at him, but Ryuji is too fast—he slides right between its legs to confuse and disorient it. Once it seems like it completely lost sight of him, he raises his hand to grip the edge of his black mask. “Come on out, Captain!”

It’s a classic tactic; make the enemy lose focus, stun it, and stop it.

A pirate straight out of the Caribbean materializes from the embers of his mask—Captain Kidd in all of his glory regards the Shadow with a look of disdain before sparks fly from the hull of his ship, and an intense streak of lightning bursts forth, shocking its target like something from a regrettable movie about torture, knocking it down to the ground, a buzz perceptible even from here. He might have overdone it.

Ann whistles. “You didn’t even let me get a chance with it.”

“You can have the next million Shadows we bump into, I promise.” He calls Captain back into his mask, fragmented pieces forming together impossibly quick. “We good, Leader?”

Akira nods. “Just let me get the loot,” he smiles at Ryuji. “Awesome voltage on that last one, Skull.”

A grin stretches over his face before he can stop himself. He won’t deny it—getting a compliment from Joker was always something he filed away for later.

He’s too busy feeling pride surge through him that he can’t even bother to get ticked off when he hears Morgana scoff. “It doesn’t matter how good that attack was; he got in the way of Lady Panther’s finishing blow. That’s a crime in my eyes.”

“But doesn’t that just mean he saved her from doing anything?” Makoto raises an eyebrow. “Technically, he prevented any danger from befalling her, right?”

“Queen, as a gentleman, I have an obligation to tell you that that is a sexist notion.”

“You did not just say that.”

Something makes Ryuji pause. Immediately, his eyes flicker around them automatically. He tunes their chattering out, and finds himself tapping his foot, a slight jitter overcoming him. His nerves are trying to tell him something. Or maybe he’s imagining it? Is it just an aftershock from the intense lightning he cast out? No. It’s been too long since he’s had any problem with electric moves, and he’s never had problems from ones that he threw out himself.

Something was wrong, and he can’t put his finger on it.

He rattles his brain trying to figure out what it is. No one’s hurt, everyone’s safe and together. Well, mostly together, since Akira’s still approaching the Shadow—

A cold sweat drapes the back of his neck. Akira is still approaching the Shadow.

The Shadow hasn’t disintegrated yet.

“Akira—!”

The name slips past his lips, codenames forgotten. In slow motion, Ryuji sees Shadow’s body tense, its mouth frothing with what looks like liquid magma made from pits of hell—specializes in curse, and a strong one at that; Ryuji can feel the potency of its malignancy from where he’s standing. He watches as Akira stiffens, fingers twitching towards his mask, ready to retaliate, or at the very least, defend. And like a domino effect of bad luck, Ryuji feels bile rise to his throat.

Akira is good at what he does. Infuriatingly good. Took the whole Metaverse bullshit like a fish to water. But even he can’t switch Personas the same moment he summons them.

Principality would crumple like tissue paper against the Shadow. And Akira along with it.

You’re too late, a voice whispers in his head. You wouldn’t make it.

A heartbeat passes. And then Ryuji is flying.

It’s never too late, screams back something stronger, something unshakeable. Not ever. Especially not for him.

His boots hit the ground like the first strike of lightning amidst a storm—impossibly fast and unexpected. Lungs wheezing and legs throbbing, he crossed the distance in the span of a breath.

The Shadow throws the curse at Akira, red and black and filled to the brim with intensity, and Akira’s eyes can only widen, pupils dilated wildly to the point where there’s only black—a mirror of what’s about to hit him if Ryuji isn’t fast enough.

He doesn’t hesitate.

Ryuji shoves Akira, hard enough that he crashes onto the ground and he can hear the breath forcefully leave his lungs, and suddenly Ryuji can’t hear anything at all. His fingertips are fire and ice, his sense of surroundings have completely dissipated. Any energy in his body is being drained, like a dam cracked into millions of pieces—and all he’s left with is air. Vaguely, he can hear a choking noise, a broken sort of sound.

The blow is not just a violent one—it never is, with curse attacks. Instead of just feeling his skin bruised or blood running down his temple, he also feels himself get weaker, his mind growing heavier. An attack on the mind and body; a perfect cocktail of fucked up.

The last thing he sees before he loses consciousness is the glint from Akira’s knife slicing through the Shadow’s throat.

====

Tokyo is currently at a wicked thirty two degrees.

The sun radiates scorching temperatures down from the sky, the concrete eagerly absorbing every bit of its heat, making something akin to walking across hot coals. It’s hot enough that a mirage is visible to the naked eye. It’s hot enough that every ice cream store has a forty-minute line-up. It’s hot enough that no birds were flying, in fear that they may truly be fried by the sun above them.

Basically, it’s hot as hell.

“Ryuji-chan, pick up the pace!”

But Haru is more vicious than any conceivable temperature.

Looking like a survivor who was lost in the desert for several days, Ryuji lets out a half-garbled battle cry and sprints the last dozen meters. Haru clicks her stopwatch.

Sitting on a lovely lilac blanket, she tsks from underneath the shade. “Three seconds slower.”

“Ugh!” he collapses beside her on the cool grass. If she looks at him from a certain angle, she can see the steam positively radiating off of him. “I’m going to beat the living shit out of the sun.”

“You know I’d support you in anything you do, Ryuji-chan, but I don’t think you’d be fast enough to catch it,” Haru says. She hands him a cold water bottle. “Drink slowly.”

He rolls over so that he can squint up at her. “You’re mean.”

“I’m harsh,” she corrects, shaking the bottle in her hand. “There’s a difference.”

He takes it. “Have you done this before?”

“Helped someone train in running? No. But,” she rummages through her pastel pink tote bag, and proudly shows him a handful of books. He squints at them. “Since I’m so new to the group and everyone has such broad interests, I decided to try reading up on them! Did you know that drinking cold water after running results in less dehydration than drinking warm water?”

Ryuji stares at her. “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“For saying you’re mean. You’re not mean. You’re real nice, Haru.”

She smiles at him and pats his head, despite the overflowing heat and moisture settled on top. “You’re very sweet Ryuji-chan, but that’s not going to make me go easy on you.”

“Yeah, yeah, you’re the tough-love kind of coach.” Ryuji sits up, cracking open the seal. Chugging down the water, he makes eye contact with Haru before slowing down substantially.

He dumps the rest of it on his head, sighing and shivering in relief. “That’s the good shit.”

“Why not wait for the sun to go down a bit?” she suggests. “The heat is really scorching, and there’s still plenty of time to keep training later.”

“Nah,” he stretches his arms behind his head before he stands again. “I gotta keep going while I still can.”

Haru frowns. “Overexertion isn’t going to help anyone.”

“Don’t you worry your fluffy head! I may be stupid, but I know when to stop when I gotta.”

“I really think you should rest for a bit.”

“I will when I’m done, I promise.”

“You looked rough in that last lap—”

“Haru,” Ryuji is grinning, but his tone leaves no room for argument. “I’m going to keep training.”

They stare at each other for a few moments, before Haru’s shoulder sags slightly. “Alright.” He’s about to say something when she cuts him off. “But only if you tell me why you’re so insistent.”

Ryuji shrugs. “If that’s what it’ll take to prove it to you, then sure. It’s kinda stupid, though.”

“I’m sure it’s not.”

“Oh, wait till you hear it,” he laughs, a little shy. “So you know how Mona and Futaba are, like, the Metaverse experts? And Makoto is the big brain? And Yusuke does the whole calling card part?” Haru nods, and he continues. “Well, I’m not really… anything. Ann already took the role of moral support and there’s no way in hell I’m the ‘brain’ in anything. Jeez, last time I picked up a paintbrush was in kindergarten. So I figured, I’d be the fast one, you know? The one that can get to someone fast enough to help them out.” Ryuji’s grin turns into something softer; less edge and more fond. It does something to her heart. “And if it’d help ‘Kira down the line, then it’d be worth it, right?”

Haru stays silent.

“Anyway! That’s enough of that cheesy shit.” He moves back to the track, running shoes scuffing at the concrete. “Wish me luck, maybe I can actually catch up to the sun this time. Teach it a lesson.”

“Ryuji.“

Looking back, he gives her a curious look. “Yeah?”

Haru hesitates.

I never once thought you were stupid. You’ve given so much more to the team than you can imagine. You have no idea how many times you’ve helped Akira without even lifting a finger.

“I have a cooler full of water behind me, so… please try your best out there.”

Ryuji gives her an enthusiastic salute. “Yes ma'am!”

He runs off, the sun continuing to beat down him relentlessly.

====

Somewhere in the back of his mind, Ryuji knew they were all going to die someday. It’s inevitable. The circle of life, the winds of time, la vie en rose, etc.

He just didn’t expect it to happen at the age of 16, on the sinking cognitive ship of their next Prime Minister, wearing a wack-ass leather outfit surrounded by his panicking friends.

“We’re going to die!” Futaba wails, knees shaking uncontrollably to the point where she can hardly keep standing. “I don’t know how to swim!”

“It’ll be fine,” Akira spits through gritted teeth. He’s far tenser than anyone else, red gloves formed into fists and eyes constantly darting around to see what can save their lives. “We just need to focus.”

Makoto points to something on their right and shouts, “There! A lifeboat!”

Sprinting down the slowly escalating ramp, their eyes widen at the single lifeboat propped at the very top of the bow—which is slowly approaching a ninety degree angle. They all had one thought in their minds.

“We’re not going to make it in time,” Yusuke says, quietly.

Akira bangs his fist into a nearby column. “To hell with that. There’s no way I’m letting us die here.”

A heavy silence falls over them. The air is practically crackling with electricity and pure agitation, but there’s also a determination between all of that. Everyone’s overcome with a need to protect their friends and teammates, but they were at a loss of what to do. A quiet realization overcomes the group—there wasn’t going to be a miracle to save them.

Ryuji’s eyes land on Akira. He’s scanning the area, Third Eye activated but unable to pick up anything that isn’t the lifeboat. There’s no panic in his clear, gray eyes, but the terror in it is the most prevalent out of anyone present.

It hits Ryuji, all at once. The boy in front of him may be his age, and even younger than some members of their group, but he is undoubtedly the leader of the infamous Phantom Thieves. Every decision he made had led them here, in this moment, in their imminent death. And if he lets them all get taken, whether it’s through the ocean or the approaching explosions behind him, the truth of the matter is Akira feels that he would be responsible. That it’s his fault that a cognitive boat would take the lives of his friends.

Yeah. That’s not happening.

Ryuji clenches his eyes shut for a few seconds and slowly opens them. He begins to jump in place, hyping himself up.

“Skull…?” Haru asks, brows furrowing.

“Hang tight, guys,” he says, taking quick breaths. He can do this. “I’ll nab the boat.”

A chorus of gasps and heated objections rang through the air, and Akira steps forward, more shaken than Ryuji’s ever seen him. “No. Skull, please—”

Ryuji throws him a wobbly grin, more for Akira than himself. In one smooth motion, he jumps down and hits the ground running.

“No!”

Immediately, he feels his knees and thighs begin to protest, only intensifying the further he sprints up. For a minute, if Ryuji closes his eyes, he can imagine that he’s in a meet. A race. That the screams he hears behind him are his track mates, and not teammates, friends, best friends that would die if he failed to get to the boat fast enough.

He pushes himself even more.

It’s a miracle that he gets to the raft before his legs give out, and he feels a satisfying crank underneath his palms when he rotates the lever. As he throws a thumbs up at his friends, seeing them safe, healthy, alive, he feels relieved beyond words.

He makes eye contact with Akira, and he really should’ve expected the explosion that comes next.

====

His ceiling has seventy-nine plastic stars.

Ryuji stares up at it from his bed, arms crossed behind his head; they’d long since lost their cheap light. It was raining hard outside, enough to rattle against his window like pebbles calling for his attention. He ignores them.

It’s been years since he got those stars—dating all the way back in middle school. He got into a bad habit of sneaking out in the middle of the night to look at the sky from the roof of their apartment building. It scared the shit out of his ma when she finally caught him, scolded him to hell and back. By the end, they found a compromise: she’d buy him a crap ton from the hundred yen store, and they’d stick it up together. When they did, it kept falling down, so she went back and bought him a bottle of superglue. Now you can’t take them off, even if you tried to use a little scraper.

It bothered him, for a while. Young boys were cruel, and anyone who came to visit always poked fun of him for it. It wasn’t until he visited Akira’s room one day, saw how pleased he was that Yusuke bought them for him that he couldn’t help but revel at his own stars again, after all this time.

Ryuji twists his body sideways, ripping his eyes away from the plastic figures. Enough of that.

His eyes have long adjusted to the darkness that surrounds him, allowing a clear view of his room in the limited moonlight. Laundry splayed around his tatami mat from his sprints training today, gaming controllers scattered on the center table from when Akira came over a few days ago. That was a blast. He helped him beat a boss he’s been stuck on for weeks, and Akira beat it like it was nothing, it was the coolest shit ever—

Ryuji forces himself to flip over to glare at the wall. Sleep. That’s a better idea.

He takes a deep breath, forcing his breathing to go steady. There’s lots to do tomorrow—school is a drag, but they plan on meeting up at Leblanc afterwards. The thought allows his muscles to relax. Really, the atmosphere of Leblanc is just so pleasing to him. The warm lighting, the run-down booths, even the smell is a welcome presence. Well, that’s mostly because Akira drags it with him wherever he—

Slowly, his eyes open.

It always comes back to him, doesn’t it?

He rolls onto his back, in a position to stare at the stars again. The rain hammers on.

Ryuji’s a dumb kid.

It’s not a self jab, it wasn’t manifested by some sort of long-standing insecurity. It’s a fact. He’s never been good with a book, never done anything half-decent by picking up a pencil, his mind was never programmed to listen and retain information in long classes. It’s definitely not like he’s the brains of the Thieves, never a strategist of some kind. His ma encouraged him to take on a tutor in the past, and he’d rather bite a finger off than spend her money on wasted potential, so he found himself wandering the streets of Central Street as a way to pass time.

Ryuji’s a dumb kid, but even he knows he’s irrevocably, completely, stupidly in love with Kurusu Akira.

He sits up and ruffles his hair, frustrated. There are too many things wrong with that sentence, too many things that can go wrong because of that sentence. Of course, he finds the one thing that can mess up the unshakeable foundation that he and Akira built for each other. He must’ve really pissed off some God upstairs for him to have a hell-bent queer awakening with his best friend.

No, that’s wrong. It was the furthest thing from hell-bent—it was soft, it was gray, it was raining, and most importantly, it took its time.

They were halfway through Kamoshida’s Palace when Ryuji realized it; the sheer amount of power that hindsight gave him made him pause long enough to get clocked out by a Shadow.

Doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter. It can’t matter, because he would never, ever do anything to fuck up what he has. Not again.

Wait, no, that’s not true. Even before Kamoshida, he’s never had something like this. He’s never had someone like him. He’s never had someone who’s so entirely on the same wavelength as him, who’d have his back even when his was against a wall. Kurusu Akira is…ethereal. Out of this world. Cool as fuck. (Hot as fuck, too.) If you lined up the entirety of Tokyo and told him he could pick one. One person out of the whole lineup to be his friend, he’d have his answer in a heartbeat.

See, now that isn’t something that changed with hindsight—Ryuji’s known that he’s been in love with Akira since before they completed Kamoshida’s Palace. And when he figured it out, he didn’t feel shock. His eyes didn’t widen, his heart didn’t start thumping like crazy. It’s more like he just scratched his head in a huh kind of way. It felt like his life had been waiting for that day in April, like everything was at a standstill until he finally met Kurusu Akira. It made sense. Everything just makes sense when Akira’s involved.

Which just makes this all the more fucked up.

He knocks his head back against the wall, eyes stuck on the raindrops’ rapidly moving shadows on his bedroom floor. Karma. That’s probably what’s happening. The world still hasn’t forgiven him for losing his shit, so they decided to make him pine for the only person that he can’t afford to lose.

He can’t even stomach the idea of trying to get over it, to try and put distance between himself and Akira. He spent a lifetime waiting for a miracle, for someone who didn’t know existed. He’s not giving up a single second of time with him. That’s probably why the world relentlessly shits on him; he’s selfish enough to keep the feelings that he has. But he can’t bring himself to regret that decision. Not with the way his breath hitches in his throat whenever Akira walks into the room.

Ryuji’s in love with his best friend, and there’s absolutely nothing he can do about it. He’s accepted it. Just like how the sky is blue, or that he well and truly hates Calculus. It’s a factor of life.

The rain seemed to fall harder, droplets sounding like rigorous hail against the windowpane. He lets out a long yawn.

Ryuji’s in love with his best friend, and there’s absolutely nothing he can do about it.

That’s not the reason why he can’t sleep at night.

Akira is a quiet guy. He gets his point across with as few words as possible, as if each letter costs him fifty yen to say out loud. So he speaks through his expression; a quirk of his brow, a tilt of his head, a certain smile is enough to carry half of the conversation.

And, every once in a while, Akira gets a look.

It comes up at the weirdest times—when the two of them baton pass in the Metaverse, when Ryuji eats ramen too fast and gets sick, when he helps an old lady cross the street. Plenty of times it’s because Ryuji is doing something incredibly stupid (like when he said that the square root of sixteen is six, because if you just get rid of the one, then that makes sense, right?), or when they’re laughing so hard neither of them can breathe. But sometimes it comes up in quieter moments, too. The two of them talking quietly in the attic at Leblanc, or when Akira confesses that he’s relieved Ryuji’s always there for him. (As if there would ever be a time where he won’t be.)

The look is subtle enough to miss but easy to find if someone knows what they’re looking for. The usual attentiveness that resides in Akira’s eyes disappears, in its place a softer gaze; his pupils get dilated, and the edge of his eyes get all crinkled like Valentine’s tissue paper. A half-smile rests on his lips, never quite turning into a full-blown grin, but that’s okay. For some reason, it all reminds Ryuji of the moon. Of soft moonlight. Of streetlamps on empty roads.

Ryuji’s in love with his best friend, and there’s a small, tiny, infinitesimal chance that his best friend might love him back.

His eyelids slide shut, though he knows that it won’t be enough to let him rest.

Realistically, he’s probably wrong. Akira isn’t in love with him, and he’s only seeing what he wants to see. With every eligible person seeming to fall in love with him at some point in time, how would it even be possible that Akira would love him?

He rubs his eyes, desperate to get rid of the unending fatigue that’s plagued him for months on end. It doesn’t work.

Bad excuse. Akira does love him, just like he loves everyone he encounters and befriends and ends up risking his life for. Ryuji’s surprised Akira hasn’t passed out yet, given his bleeding heart for the entire population of Tokyo.

Lightning flashes and thunder rumbles as he rubs his eyes harder.

But what if he wasn’t wrong? What if the signals he’s seeing aren’t based on misunderstood yearning?

When his eyes start to burn, his fingers move up to his hair.

There’s no way in hell he’d ever risk losing his best friend. His partner. His Akira. It’s not something he can gamble. It’s not worth it.

He begins to tug, hands shaking, and he can barely feel the sting of pain from nearly pulling his hair out his scalp.

It’s not worth it. He decided that in the very beginning.

Ryuji buries his face into his palms.

But he is so, so exhausted of being tired.

Lightning flashes, and for a split-second, his room is bright.

Fuck it.

By the time thunder rumbles through his apartment, he’s already out the front door.

His sneakers squelch against the wet concrete, soaking his unsocked feet. He’s sprinting fast enough that the street lights around him blur, and he can feel quick breaths getting pulled out of him. It takes him a few seconds to realize that he forgot to wear a raincoat, but he doesn’t care.

Akira is his best friend. Akira accepted him, flaws and all. Akira loves him, one way or another. That’s what held him back. He can’t risk losing that.

Ryuji quickly checks both sides before running across the street, wiping the rain off his brow, and keeps going.

But that’s what should’ve pushed him into confessing sooner. Because if that’s all true, then that can only ever mean that Akira would accept this part of him too, right?

He jerks out of the way as he almost barrels over a fire hydrant, making him step into a deep puddle. It doesn’t slow him down.

Maybe he would’ve realized it sooner if he wasn’t too fucking tired to think straight.

His lungs begin to complain, his breaths turning to wheezes, but he ignores it in favor of going faster.

Too late for that now. All the matters now is to talk to—

He skids to a halt.

In front of him—eyes wide, hair drenched, no shoes—stands Kurusu Akira.

Ryuji’s mouth falls open, and for a minute, he almost laughs. Of course. He should’ve known. Just as he’s willing to sprint to Akira at an unholy hour in the night…

He smiles sheepishly at him, and Ryuji feels his chest constrict in the loveliest way possible.

…Akira would do the exact same thing for him.

The rain slows, and the thunder ceases for a moment. The world pauses long enough for both of them to speak in the same breath, the same heartbeat:

“I’m in love with you.”

#fic tag #akiryu #pegoryu #fanfic #writing #ryuji sakamoto #akira kurusu #persona 5 #persona 5 royal #mine #desperate as that sounds #and yeah man thats a jon bellion song #fic

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