#gonna also look into maybe some in person classes for adults

[lucyfrostblade]

Hi! Just saw your reblog and I'm so interested in your thoughts on Fig and Kipperlilly being similar, and was wondering if you'd share?

Yes! i am always down to talk about my two favorite fantasy high characters but before we get into it, some assumptions I have made about FHJY that aren't explicit in the text but I won't necessarily be justifying here:

(under the cut)

Kipperlilly was in some form or another manipulated by porter

Kipperlilly truly cared about Lucy, and to a lesser extent the rest of her party

The biggest and most obvious similarity between the two is the anger they feel. When we first see Fig she's a deeply angry kid. She hates her mom for hiding the truth of her parentage and for wrecking their family the way she did. And while she forgives Gilear much faster than Sandra Lynn, she also starts off incredibly angry at him.

Her anger is very justified, and it's centered around the ways the adults in her life mistreated her. Sandra Lynn by hiding the fundamental truth of who she is from her for so long, and Gilear by, before the start of the series, saying that she isn't a Faeth anymore.

Our introduction to Fig is her taking that anger out on both Sandra Lynn and Gilear, and she does almost immediately see the error of her treating at least Gilear the way she does.

Brennan: You see a little tear forms in his eye and you see he says, Gilear: I know that I said some hurtful things when I first found out. Fig: Yeah, you said, “You're no longer a Faeth,” and guess what, I'm not. I'm just Fig now. Gilear: Fig, I'm sitting here with beans on my shirt. Fig: I know, I saw you ate one on the ride here. Gilear: I was hungry, all right? I've put on some weight. You ever heard of a fat elf? You ever heard of it? I've never seen a fat elf in my life and I'm here with a bad comb over and beans on my shirt. Fig: Okay, fine. Gilear: And I'm reaching out to you. Fig: I'm sorry, Gilear, I'm sorry that I got angry at you. You're just some random man, I shouldn't be mean to you.

But for almost the entire season, Fig does not forgive Sandra Lynn. She's still so angry with her that she struggles to see Sandra Lynn as a complex person right up until episode 15 "Family Fires", is unsure as to whether or not Sandra Lynn is a good person worthy of saving:

Emily: Because I am undecided on my mom. Because at first, I felt like I, oh maybe she's a good person, but now I maybe feel like she's part of this ruby plot. Brennan: Go ahead and give me an insight check. Emily: (rolls) 14. (emotional acoustic guitar music) Brennan: (sighs) Your mom has never lived up to the standard you put on her of making your life good and perfect. She never was able to protect you from all harm and suffering in the world. And maybe that's not fair. And she's probably just a person, and those photos make it look like-- Emily: She's a complex person. She's allowed to be. Brennan: Yup.

So anger, and in particular the ways it can make someone lash out, is something that Fig is intimately aware of, something that she has had to fight to control herself. The difference is that the adults in her life helped her, they supported her. Gilear, Sandra Lynn, and Gorthalax all gave her the space she needed to be angry but also helped her move past that.

Kipperlilly didn't have that. To our knowledge she only had Jawbone, someone who only knew her through Aguefort and evidently did not know how to help her in the ways she needed.

There's also the matter of Porter who, in the third episode "After the Afterlife" singles Fig out when she audits barbarian class:

Porter: Let's see what everyone else in the class, [players laugh] what do other people, what do other people kind of think? Like young lady, what do you think about rage? Fig: What do I think about rage? Porter: What do you think about it? Fig: [sighs] Well, I kind of think it's inevitable, 'cause, I mean, like, people really let you down left and right. Porter: Yeah! Fig: So you're always gonna feel rage. It's just a matter of whether or not you use it productively or just whether or not you control it or it controls you. Brennan: A small tear forms in the corner of his eye. Porter: That's exactly right. That is exactly right. That is amazing.

He sees something in her. Porter sees the rage within her, and he encourages it. But more than that, Fig's perspective that "you control [rage] or it controls you" highlights another contrast between Fig and Kipperlilly. Fig learns to control her rage, while Kipperlilly literally gives control up to the shatterstar. But they still have that same rage, just on the opposite ends of expressing it.

We also know that Fig cares deeply about her friends, and that prior to the start of the series, her former friends abandoned her when she started to grow horns. She was alone when she came to Aguefort. She was isolated from her peers and from her family. She found the Bad Kids, and she is utterly devoted to her friends. She'll do anything for them.

But Kipperlilly? Brennan said in an interview with Caitlin Tyrrell that the Rat Grinders didn't know each other before forming the party. We don't know how the party formed really, but we know that she picked out the name the High 5 Heroes.

I think the High-Five Heroes part of it is sweet, but there's actually something even a little bit sinister to it to me, of being like, "We're the High-Five Heroes." And you're like, "You've pitched a name; we all just met. We don't have anything going yet." ( source )

He calls it sinister that she insisted on the name, but I can't see it as anything other than said. It speaks to me of a kid so desperate for friendship that she's willing to force inside jokes for just a hint of that. She doesn't want to be alone, and Fig might've put up a better act, but she didn't want to be alone at the start of Freshman Year either.

The difference is who they found. Fig got the Bad Kids, people who love and care about her. She had support from her friends and from her family. Kipperlilly was emotionally in a very similar state as Fig but with none of that support, and even had people who either couldn't support her (Jawbone) or wanted to encourage this isolation and rage (Porter).

Kipperlilly is Fig if the first day of school went different, if she ended up with people who didn't understand her like the Bad Kids did and if she couldn't get the support she needed from the adults in her life.

#kipperlilly copperkettle #figueroth faeth #fig faeth #dimension 20 #fantasy high #fantasy high junior year #does this make any sense #it's very clear in my head but i worry i rambled #or drew conclusions from no where

[ghwosty]

didn't have anyone to kiss at midnight this year, that is not going to be the case next year, New Years resolution is to officially move tf on and put myself back out there

#now to decide on a dating app to use #I used okcupid a long time ago before I got with my ex (we didn't meet on there) #and never got any matches that went anywhere #I've heard hinge is decent #thing is.. I don't really want just hook ups #maybe a one or two to get it out of my system #but I'm really looking for a long term relationship #gonna also look into maybe some in person classes for adults #like an art or photography class maybe #meet other adults with common interests #also I want to hook up with in person dnd group this year so I need to start putting my feelers out for anything local #I should try local game shops #I wanna make new friends this year and link back up with some old friends too #basically my resolution is 'be more social' and 'find love'

[munamania]

i won’t screenshot the dms bc i don’t feel like opening the latest message but EYE posted on my story abt the tiktok pictured below basically about how i got horny thinking abt someone working through a difficult math problem lol don’t worry abt that anyway sam slides up bc i cut part of it out so as to avoid insta censors and my slight embarrassment lol and was like does that say c*m and i was like well yes and then he was like haha what you’re into math… girl u have to walk w the thought process 😑 which i know you’re incapable of anyway so i vaguely responded like ah yeah what being away from stem for so long will do to u and he responds with like ten messages. including. ‘you gotta do it yourself’ that’s not the point 🙄 ‘you know how i’m terrible at talking to women’ wow really ‘so i realized i can calculate the speed of cum’ ‘bc i have some data’ DID I ASK?????!???!?!!!?!!!!! hello there’s oversharing and then there’s this… does the girl you’re having sex with know you share to this extent. and then he said how he accidentally brought this up to someone irl to be like haha awk whoops and i was like yeah well there r times where perhaps we need to self censor. and then i also get a message that’s like ‘hang on im doing the math’ IM NEVER EVER EVER GONNA BE ATTRACTED TO U I HOPE U KNOW THAT SCREAAMMMMM (and u need to know bc he’s genderfluid. im only using one set of pronouns for clarity on here ok i promise im not a dick. but he thinks he’s like. an exception for lesbians basically… like he doesn’t Count…. and like look im no essentialist im all for like freaky gender sex but also at so many other turns you do take advantage of being seen as a white male so. i don’t. yeah.) he’s kind of like the creepy dude at the edge of the friend group in high school named matt who would constantly harass me and my ex but like tried to be so lowk abt it. and it’s so bad basically. ‘17mph is crazy’ i hope you fall in an intersection sorry i can’t do this anymore 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 so pissed i have to see him tmrw i should be able to watch mmxxl w scully in peace

#like. WHAT possesses a person to say all this #it’s not like i’ve never talked abt sex stuff w sam or friends i mean look at my major and shit we’re watching we’re all adults here #but like HUUUUHHHHH???? on my silly little story about wanting to watch someone do calc or some shit… shut up… #it’s actually insufferable and i need u all to know. it has not always been to #like. this egregiously bad. certainly there are some flags i missed over time even when we first met maybe but he was significantly #more chill last year.. at least as far as i interacted w him. this is like. yeah idk #and just any time we’re together in person now he launches into whatever is on his mind or he’s up to at that moment what happened to hello #how are you etc. not that i can even like stand conversation esp like. dude we haven’t talked since the day we recorded the podcast #assignment which was also egregious. why would you start off like this. hello #abby talks #i hope his other roommate like beats him up or something. wont happen but well #AND more importantly. do i wear a mini skirt tmrw if i’m seeing roommate #we’re supposed to but we were also hoping to hang outside and now it’s gonna rainnnn but we’ll see #i don’t usually go for a cunty little fit on a monday. but i could. AND i get to go to class a half hour late

[aaaaaaaaaaaa-hey-its-jude-or-bee]

HELLO!!! LOOK HERE FOR RULES AND STUFF PLEASE!!

(thanks to my lovely honey comb I found out what to call you all ❤️)

The pollen(newer people!);

.

The honey(;

@spooky-bunnys & @demonic-spooky-bunny (they're so lovely so you can go look at them!! Same person!!), (ok I got the ok for tagging Sirius guys let's GOOO!!!!!!) @cupiddoves they're here to read, 🫚 anon now as well omg

Ok so think of the creator(me, as a whole person, with all of the characters I write for around me, and you guys are the pollen and honey(but still pollen since honey no move .. but called honey yet pollen like a honeysuckle pollen because still sweet and can be consumed, and the pollen is able to like move around to the characters, think of you Sam lovers going towards Sam, surrounding him and having his poor allergies act up, yeah, and I just talk to you guys like I'm insane, how lovely right??) ok.............. Let's get to the introduction then

Introduction!!

HiHihI my name is Bee,, or you can call Cedric Or just Brian.

My pronouns are He/His/Him, and I'm a 🏳️‍⚧️trans man🏳️‍⚧️ trying to get through life, I am also currently taking medical classes and I've watched a live WRIST surgery as well(it was so fucking cool.)

I'm 🇨🇦Canadian indigenous🤍💛♥️🖤🇨🇦

I probably will write HCs, small stories and other things for you if you ask nicely (I will write them depending on the ask if it's not told)

Let's get into what I will and won't write.

What I won't write

Female readers.. YOU HAVE OTHER WRITERS WHO WILL WRITE THAT. PLEASE WHAT POINT DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND.

I DO NOT WRITE FOR FEMALE READERS OR USERS OR F!MC

First up, Noncon/Con-Noncon(BC it feels icky,,)

Rape ykyk not good at all BC wtf

Pedo

Incest

Child/adult(Like what the fuck.)

Ageplay (like?? Ion wanna write some character or reader acting as a child bff??)

Any kinks that have liquid other than cum(BC it's SPERM.)

Domestic abuse(Ion deal well with that)

Abuse

Pregnancy kinks or just pregnancy in general

Giving BIRTH???

Nothing to do with child birth or child death or anything to do with children dying or abuse or whatever.

I will not write fucking sexual assault, BC it makes me iffy.

No female parts pls,,, (like for trans ppl I'll give you a dick but I don't wanna write abt the female parts.)

In between

Age difference (Not a fresh adult BC ....creepy) I'll write like only readers 25 years of age to whatever age the other character is at.

What I will write

Fluff & wholesomeness

Smut and angst

Natural kinks (not too graphic or high...)

A little bit of choking but not full on choking.

Small knife play if you're interested in that but not fully gonna stab you or hurt you like??

Bondage is ok if both parties consent.

For the smut I might go full if you want or just small if I'm not feeling up to writing a lot of smut(depends on the character too)

MLM and TMLM yes I'll write.

Some hybrid and monster au stuff too!!

A lot of fluff and just sweet stuff BC silly :3

Ion mind anything!! But beware that some people will send smut asks so!! I'll try n just add a photo before it so you won't have to accidentally read it and I'll add words to it for you guys!!

Fandoms omg!!

Stardew valley (+Expanded)!!

Dead by daylight!!

Slashers

TF2 (I'm trying to know all characters pls bare with me for this one)

Left4dead (+2)!!

Call of Duty and Cold war!!(I love sims and Adler from cold war,,, and I LOVE Gaz sm from modern warfare,,)

Marble hornets

Animal crossing new horizons as well

Creepypasta (MAYBE... DEPENDS...)

Ok Movie fandoms.

OCTONAUTS!!!!!

stranger things

The walking dead.

Sweet tooth

Titans (with Dick Grayson and Rachel ykyk?? Not like the anime, I never seen that)

Black summer

The rain

TAU (holy shit please go watch it, it's a really good movie along with the rain and the mist but I love TAU)

The mist

#aaaaaaaaaaaa hey its jude or bee #stardew valley #marble hornets #stardew valley expanded #octonauts #slashers #dbd #dead by daylight #left 4 dead #left 4 dead 2 #tau movie #black summer #the rain #the mist #the walking dead #stranger things #tf2 #team fortress 2 #L4D #L4D2 #sweet tooth #dc titans #titans #call of duty #cod #cod mw2 #cod modern warfare #cold war #cod cold war #animal crosing new horizons

[pervertedreams]

𝐞𝐱𝐭𝐫𝐚 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭 - 𝐞.𝐦

prompt: now that eddie has passed highschool he has to pass college in order to get a decent job, (he also wants to make his uncle proud) but just like high school he’s struggling. at this point he’ll do anything for extra credit.

cw: professor!reader, afab!reader, fem!reader, student!eddie, slightly older eddie (23/25), pussy eating, desperate!eddie

don’t be afraid to tell me what you think feedback is super encouraging, and asks are always open!

minors shoo ! (not proof read)

this wasn’t his original plan if he’s being honest, he didn’t like school at all, he had a hard time doing high school so he’s not sure how he’s gonna do college out of all things. but he wanted to be the first of the munson family to have a diploma, wanted to make his uncle proud, and it was pretty damn hard to get a decent paying job with a high school diploma. he was damn there failing, education just wasn’t his strong suit. he went for mechanics, it wasn’t as hard as other majors available but he still struggled, even in a subject he liked.

the only thing that motivated him, the only thing that urged him to attend classes everyday was you, his teacher. he doesn’t mean to seem ignorant but he didn’t expect a woman to be teaching his class, let alone an attractive one. his crush on you was the only thing pushing him along. he used every excuse under the sun to have a reason to get closer to you, asking to hang out after school, asking for extra help; which he needs. he wanted you so bad, thought about you everyday. thought about the short pencil skirts you wear, and the button up that stop at your cleavage. the way your legs cross when you sit on the edge of the desk, the way your chest hangs low besides his face when you bend over to help him. and here he is after school yet again, this time begging for extra credit.

you ‘sadly’ suck you teeth, “i don’t know what to tell you, it’s a little late for extra credit.” you shrug. you’re grading a few papers before you head home, wanted to cut in some down time for later. or at least that was the plan before mr. munson came barging through your door yet again. he’s sitting behind your desk, only a few feet beside you.

“there’s no extra assignments i can do, just to push my grade a little? i need to be the first in my family to graduate. please.” his pleading is honest, big round eyes gleaming with desperation. you can’t help it when his pathetic facial expression makes your thighs squeeze.

you’ve never felt this way about a student before, of course you’ve had attractive students but eddie. something about his was so intriguing, you wanted to get to know him better, wanted to feel him, wanted to have more than a teacher/student relationship. although you both are adults, it just seems inappropriate.

you scribble a few things on the paper below you, sighing at the fact that you have to turn eddie down again. “i’m sorry.” you finally respond, but he’s silent. the gleam in his eyes slightly shift, but you can’t quiet out your finger on it so you continue to your papers.

he’s studying you, watching how you push your hair off your shoulder cause the room is a little hot and stuffy, how your crack your knuckles after writing for too long, the way you crotch at your thigh but subtly push your skirt up, giving him a little view of the cup of your ass. you’ve been rubbing your thighs together this whole time and he’s noticed, noticed how you look at his lips when he talks, the way you e eyed him down when he walks into class late. notice how you’ve always been a little more sweeter to him than the others, and maybe if he pushed enough not only could he help his grade, but help his personal needs as well.

he’s rolling his chair closer to you, you nearly jump when his knee bumps into your bare thigh, rough jeans scratching against the skin. his face is much closer now, and you hate yourself for cowering beneath his stare. he’s genuinely a sweetheart, but he does have somewhat of an intimidating look. you feel so foolish feeling this way about a student, you only have him by a year, but being the older one and the authority made you push your feelings down for eddie, but that’s slowly starting to fade the more he presses you.

“there’s gotta be something i can do for extra credit. i mean i’ll do anything.” his voice is deeper, and that shift you noticed earlier you’re now realizing is lust. the feeling of his fingertips lightly grazing the inner part of you knee makes your breath hitch. “don’t you think that’ll be inappropriate mr. munson.” you calling him mister is making his dick stiffen, only growing the already noticeable tent in his pants.

he shrugs, “we’re both adults aren’t we?” the sudden movement of him dropping to his knees makes you gasp. “please, anything miss.”

any other student you would’ve stopped them by now, way before it could’ve gotten to this point, but the way he’s on his knees literally begging. the way his head lays in your lap, how he kisses the top of your thigh, it’s making you cave. you’ve never had a situation like this before. students flirting with you? yeah of course. but quite literally begging? you would’ve never thought.

“eddie.” you’re breathless, brain already hazy from the sight beneath you, you didn’t know what to do. you did like eddie and it’s been made clear he likes you, you’re both adults, he needs the extra credit, and you don’t mind a little pleasure. why not? it’ll be a one time thing.

now it’s his turn to let out a desperate breath, the way you purr his name, he’s kissing your thighs again, lightly rubbing up and down the sides of them with his ring clad hands. chin resting on your knees as he looks up at you with greed, “fuck the credit, please just let me taste you.” even with him hunched over you can see his hard on through his jeans, your can see the curve and imprint of his length. you finally touch him, dainty manicured fingertips grazing his cheek, he’s leaning into your touch with closed eyes. this is all he’s wanted.

your lips are sealed in a straight line, still contemplating. eventually you give him a small nod, slowly opening you legs to him. “i suppose i could make a few arrangements if you do a decent job.” the way your voice runs like silk with each word that rolls off your tongue, the way the warm scent of your cunt hits his nose. he’s subtly bucking his hips into nothing, cock begging for a release but it feels much better to refrain. “thank you.” his voice is hushed, cold hands pushing at your thighs, your pussy buzzing with anticipation.

your skirt snaps and scrunches at your hips, giving him a view of your white, cotton panties. a small wet spot has already made itself known at the bottom of your underwear. he’s looking back up at you with a smug grin, “this cause of me?” he lightly chuckles at the face you give him, putting his focus back at feast before him.

he’s inching his face closer to your cunt, licking a long stride from the bottom of your mound to your clit, wetting the panties further. he tries fighting back the satisfied smile on his lips when your hips slightly buck at the contact. he does it one more time before finally hooking his finger through the sides of your underwear, and pulling them down your legs. the panties get stuck on the back of your shoe heel before he finally pulls it off, the pressure making the underwear snap in his face. he can feel his precum leaking, getting a better smell of your scent briefly, and he can’t help himself. he brings the wet mound of your panties to his nostrils taking a good whiff, your smell is addictive.

your mouth is agape, in utter shock, you’ve never seen a sight like this before, never seen a man so desperate. and it turns you on like no other. “m’sorry, i had too.”

you don’t respond, you don’t know how. he’s grinning at how he leaves your speechless, and before you even get the chance to process anything, he dives his head back in between your thighs. tip of his nose nudging your clit, and the pad of his tongue lapping and licking at your weeping hole. his head is slightly bobbing with the way his pink muscle if fucking your sweet entrance. you’re fighting it, fighting the urge to fuck his face harder, fighting the urge to roll your head back, biting your tongue so you don’t moan. you feel guilty for enjoying it this much and he can tell.

“please tell me i’m doing good.” you almost didn’t catch what he said with the way it’s muffled into your folds. “please don’t hold back on me.” that was enough convincing for you. letting the tenseness in your body loose, head finally rolling back, hips jerking harder into his face, hand reaching to tug tighter at his fluffy brown curls.

he’s desperate at that way his tonguing at your folds, cold rings sting the heat of your inner thighs. the noises he’s making are lewd, only edging you closer and closer to your finish. “how am i doing so far, ma’am.”

‘ma’am’ it was worse than miss. you replayed it over and over again.

“really good. you’re on the right track eddie.”

his eyes roll at the sound of his name, the way your drag his name out in a delicious moan, he can’t contain himself any longer. his hunger for you only growing stronger as he groans into your cunt. he brings his calloused fingers to your clit, running at the sore nub, making your entire body jerk.

“keep doing that— fuck.” your pleading is hushed, not wanting to warn or worry any of the other teachers that stick around late. “m’close.

the rumbling of his groaning vibrates against your cunt, giving you just what you needed to cum. rolling your hips harder against his face as you ride out your climax. he’s still sloppily lapping at your cunt, overstimulating you with the way you shut your thighs around his head.

his lips rip away from you as you both jump at the noise of a door knock. eddie panics as you shove him under your desk, tucking yourself in so whoever’s entering doesn’t see your poor job at fixing yourself. “come in.” your voice is hoarse and stuttered, still sore from all the strained moaning.

a tall, older man enters your class room, small pile of papers clothed at his chest. everything seems slowed with how long it takes him to reach the front of your desk.

“hey ms. y/l/n, just wanted to give you the papers you asked fo-“ the teachers heavy voice pauses, slightly stepping back to examine your appearance. “you alright, look a little flushed.”

before you get to answer there’s a small wet kiss places on your knee making you jump. you try laughing it off, wracking your manicured nails through your now frizzed out hair. “yeah of course! m’fine.” you give him a small thanks as you grab the papers from him. he stare lingers as he decides not to pry, you taking a sigh of relief when he’s finally gone.

you can feel eddie’s hands push your rolling chair out, looking up at you from his knees, mouth still slick from your arousal. “so my grade?”

#my work┊ ˚➶ ｡˚ #eddie munson #eddie munson x fem reader #eddie munson stranger things #stranger things #eddie munson concept #eddie munson smut #eddie munson x fem!reader smut #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson x black!reader

[this-here-is-not-singing]

Tagged by @help-help-i-need-an-adult to share 15 facts about myself

Thank you 🥰

I'm not good with coming up with facts about myself so I went back to the original questions 😅

Are you named after anyone?

Kinda? My irl name is the same as one of my parents friends but I don't think it was anything special like "we named our baby after you" they just liked the name

My online name is a made-up-by-@does-your-flag-mean-death female version of a character from a book I was obsessed with as a kid (Wolfsaga by Käthe Recheis)

When was the last time you cried?

I don't fully remember tbh it's been surprisingly long (a few weeks maybe?) but I'm guessing it was during a movie

Do you have any kids?

love that we're all so old that this is a valid question now lol. but no

What sports do you play/have played?

Never was much of a teamsports person but I used to do ballet in elementary school, was in a swim club and now I hike & do yoga. Also used to boulder semi-regularly before the pandemic but never got back into it

Do you use sarcasm often?

Not really? Not notably often at least I think?

What's the first thing you notice about someone?

Usually their hair. And like... a general vibe that's mostly "alternative/metalhead/nerd or not"

Eye color?

Greenish-brownish? Hazel? something like that

Any talents?

Apparently I'm talented at playing the drums at least according to my drum teacher but I can't practice at home so idk. and i think I'm pretty good at writing when it comes to scientific reports and papers. I don't think I could write prose very well but writing in a concise and easily readable way comes pretty easy to me

Scary movies or happy endings?

Happy endings all the way. If the scary movie is good it's fine but I'm just a sucker for happy cheesy endings. Nothing makes me cry more than people hugging at the end of dramatic movies

Where were you born?

Germany

Do you have any hobbies?

I play the drums, play & DM DnD, love hiking & reading and recently started crotcheting. Also gaming

Do you have any pets?

Not right now! Grew up with bunnies, had a snake for a few years and we're planning to get cats once i have a stable job

Height?

176cm I think

Favorite school subject?

Well I'm doing my master's in biology so take a wild gues haha

But looking back I also really fondly remember German class. And Theater if that counts haha

Dream job?

Researcher but also being payed well & not working overtime & with a non-temporary contract. About as realistic as my actual dreams.

And here's a bonus fact: I ramble lol so here's some people I'd like to hear from

@kitsune-sam @helianthus21 @spookyshadowfox @a-hearts-a-heavy-burden @crescendoofstars @asongaboutpirates @augusta-imperatrix and i guess @does-your-flag-mean-death (if i find out anything new about you like this I'm gonna be pissed though 😘)

#ask game #personal #tag game

[spiritshaydra]

Okay yeah gonna say screw it and just post the fullbody I finished back in November because her ref is taking too long and I wanna share my cringe ass nae nae hellspawn 😭

OKAY SO

THIS IS REQUIEM (Or just “Em”)

And she’s a Megasound fanspawn,, bear with me, I’ve never made an oc like this before so I’ve been extremely nervous to show the creature off. 💀(especially since this is the fancharacter type I avoided making at all costs when in high school despite it leading to some very interesting character development.) Eventually I just said screw it, I’m proud of the design and character work I’ve been developing since August, I’m going to show her off.

I don’t really take her all too seriously as I originally made her to shitpost because I thought it’d be funny. And like my main TFP OC Quantum, she eventually grew past that and became something more. (While still keeping her silly at the same time)

I have. A LOT. Of development for this single celled organism that prolly won’t fit in one post, so on here I’m just going to do a sort of character bio thing (based on the format of Quantum’s Toyhouse bio) to introduce her. (Maybe I’ll do a Q&A sort of thing if anyone’s actually interested in that?)

HERE WE GO:

Name: Requiem (Em for short)

Name Origin: This is what happens when you put a poetry/mythology nerd and a music nerd in a room together and have them name something. You get a name with origins in both music and literature (A music or literary composition that acts as a form of remembrance for the souls of the dead.) annnnnnd a reference to a mythological figure (the name of Megatronus/The Fallen’s weapon, the Requiem Blaster. Gee sure wonder who’s idea that was.) Unfortunately, the goblin who was given that name has a grand total of two brain cells and has as much class as a hagfish.

Gender: female

Pronouns: she/her

Species: Cybertronian

Height:  12ft approximate (for design depicted above)/ 30ft (adult; not pictured)

Alt-Mode: (Base) Cybertronian heavy bomber/ (Earth) Tupolev Tu-160 Blackjack

Home Planet: Earth

Faction: Decepticon

Pre-War Occupation: Did not exist before the war.

Personality: Requiem is loud, stubborn, rude, mischievous, a little naive, and all around a feral mess. Absolutely no filter. Textbook example of “curiosity killed the cat”. The champion of the age-old schoolyard discussion of “my dad can beat up your dad.” For… obvious reasons.

She’s easily bored and easily distracted, and thinks it’s entertaining to mess with other bots in the form of stupid pranks and barrages of questions.

Has a bit of a potty mouth and gets creative with her insults.

A fembo (but a lil mean) was told to use her head in a fight, but ended up head butting the opponent and subsequently knocking them out as a result.

As a result of (EXTREME) helicopter parenting combined with adrenaline junkie behavior, Requiem has the tendency to be an escape artist and to purposely seek out potentially dangerous situations such as but not limited to: Diving into a hurricane (to see what would happen), storm chasing (the bigger the better! Also to see what would happen), playing Icarus and getting struck by lightning on the Flight Deck of the warship (STRIKE ME DOWN ZEUS), sneaking out of the Nemesis and simultaneously smuggling all sorts of creepy crawlies and other organic critters back on board (has to be shaken out just to be sure.), being a little too interested in volcanic activity, sneaking weapons out of the armory and attempting to join the fight, and sneaking away from the ship to “explore”. Em wrangling is a very tiring objective.

If Rumble and Frenzy were alive, they would’ve definitely gotten along. (And would’ve been an unstoppable force of chaos oh gOD.)

She likes the pastel magical horse show about friendship, LOVES stickers, and her absolute favorite color is the most obnoxious eye bleeding shade of pink imaginable. (She was denied changing her PRIMARY paint job color to it for obvious reasons. Honey, that is a LOOK and not exactly a good one.)  She likes to pretend to be a gladiator. She likes to give people really stupid and bad nicknames for the hell of it. A favorite being combining the first few letters of a name or descriptor with “uncle”. She thinks it’s hilarious. A little too interested in arson and explosives. Her music taste can be described as “2012 Warrior cats amv” and “noise”. Really likes slasher films for some reason.

She exhibits several behaviors that could only be described as those of a cryptid. (…or cat.) These range from being able to sneak up on others and move without making a sound, staring unblinkingly and expressionlessly at things and other bots, climbing up and perching on top of things, noise mimicry, recharging facedown in a deathlike manner, and the worst thing being how she used to skitter across the walls and ceilings of the Nemesis as a sparkling. There were a handful of instances where she got into the vents of the ship and it was a nightmare trying to coax her back out. Oh yeah. There was a biting problem.

Requiem either hates or actively dislikes things ranging from water, being told to stay still, the thunder part of thunderstorms, the medbay, and being quarantined.

Her social ability leaves much to be desired, as she was raised in total isolation from her own age group, so she lacks most social skills as a result. Because of this, she often comes across as “weird” and as a bully, even if unintentional. Due to her isolated upbringing, she is a very lonely individual despite not exactly acting the part. Being routinely quarantined does not help that feeling of loneliness in the slightest. Em wants nothing more than a friend, or at least an acquaintance to spend time with. It’s just that, given who her parents are, that makes things impossible.

She has a very unhealthy view on death, as it isn’t exactly rare onboard the Nemesis. Surprisingly, she was actively kept away and shielded from most of the fighting as a child- however, in wartime there’s only so much one could be protected from even as the child of the highest ranking individuals of the faction.

#spirit’s oc vault #REAL Spirit refs #maccadam #maccadams #tfp #tfp oc #transformers #transformers oc #Transformers Prime #OC #original character #fancharacter #fanspawn #megasound #tfp megasound #mecha oc #mecha design #Character Design #robot #robot oc #decepticon #decepticon oc #digital art #sci-fi #science fiction #procreate #procreate art #Man this thing took fifteen hours to complete because I had to completely redo the lineart #pro tip: make sure you’re drawing on the right layer AND that you didn’t accidentally merge the lines with the sketch

[nothorses]

As an atheist who frequently despairs at the way progressive tumblr talks about us, I've loved reading your recent posts on the subject. You've articulated some stuff that bugged me but I could never quite describe, like how people think of atheism as some broken remnant of christianity rather than a valid worldview on its own.

But there's one thing you've emphasized repeatedly that I just don't think I can agree with: the idea that other people being confidently convinced of their beliefs means that we should act less confident of ours. Yes, I recognize that most religious people are at least as confident in their faiths as I am in my non-belief. But people are confidently wrong all the time, about all kinds of stuff. When anti-vaxxers, flat earthers, climate change deniers, homeopaths, astrologers, or psychics are confidently wrong, we don't take it as a reminder to humble ourselves in the face of disagreement, especially when it comes time to make decisions based on the facts at issue. Sure, we usually don't preach about it to strangers, maybe we decide it's not worth losing a relationship over, maybe we don't bring it up at thanksgiving, but we don't throw our hands up and declare it a tie because both sides wrote down an answer.

Like, let's be clear, this is a question of fact, just like any pseudoscience or conspiracy theory. The supernatural does not exist. Humankind has spent the entirety of our species' history looking for it, we would all desperately like for any of it to be real, and if there was anything there to find, we would've found something by now.

So why does the fact that a lot of people are confidently wrong about that mean that the ones who aren't have to act less confident than everyone else?

It's not that we need to be "less confident" in our beliefs; I have seen people argue that you can't prove a negative or whatever, there's stuff we don't understand yet, so we can't actually claim atheism is Definitely Correct. and like. I fundamentally disagree with that, actually. it's not something I want to get in arguments on tumblr about (can you fucking imagine) but I think the logical conclusion of "you can't prove a negative" is not "therefore, anything you can't prove isn't true is equally as valid". it's that demanding people to prove a negative is unreasonable, and the onus of proof in fact falls on the people claiming a positive.

this is also how things work when someone on tumblr claims I'm a sex freak who hates women and is also a TERF: it's not my responsibility to prove that whatever unhinged accusations some rando on the internet comes up with aren't true. it's their responsibility to prove that they are.

but here's the thing: it's not about who's right, here. that doesn't actually matter.

there are two things you need to consider here:

1. How likely this person is to listen to you

2. Whether the thing they believe actually has a notable impact on anyone else.

Anti-vaxxers believe something that directly and adversely impacts other people. Climate change deniers also do. Flat-earthers conceivably could be harmless, but the roots and execution of that ideology lead to a lot of harmful, antisemitic conspiracy theories that do harm to real life people.

But like, I don't care if Cindy from class thinks astrology is real. I don't actually have to worry about that unless she starts trying to discriminate against people based on their star signs (looking at you, white queer 20-somethings looking for roommates in Seattle).

I don't care if my mom thinks teatree oil is gonna help her... idk, whatever she thinks teatree oil does. She also takes the meds she needs and sees a doctor about stuff, and the addition of teatree oil isn't hurting her. I worry even less about adult strangers making medical decisions for themselves; that's their business, and their choice. I'll take issue with it if they deprive anyone else of necessary medical care on that basis.

#1 is harder to consider, I think. A lot of us want it to be the case that others will listen to us, and a lot of us want to believe that if our arguments are good enough and we're good enough at it, we can get through to anyone.

That's a fantasy. A very silly, very egotistical fantasy likely to drive you to frustration, and ultimately to isolation. The fact of the matter is that it's rarely about you; people decide to listen or not, and there's nothing you can do about it if they decide not to listen. Pushing the issue doesn't change that.

When people accuse me of unhinged shit on tumblr, I don't take it upon myself to prove a negative. I might address those claims in some way, and remind people to get proof of the positive first, but only if it gets to be enough of an issue that I feel I need to. Ultimately, I know the people making those claims don't care, and aren't listening; the only reason I address them at all is if they have an adverse impact on me or others.

People who believe in things we don't believe exist... well, first, they often do believe they have proof. That's just not a basis you're gonna win an argument about that on. And, also, they have no intention of listening to you- and that's fine. As long as their beliefs aren't causing them to hurt others, nobody needs to worry about it. And if they do, we can worry about the impact and the things directly relating to it instead of trying to convince every religious person with flaws to just stop being religious.

Some atheists are assholes because of what they believe. That's not a fact we can ignore, either.

At the end of the day, the goal is just to share space with others. We don't need everyone to agree with us, we don't need everyone to believe the same things, and it's a good idea, in fact, to look at those other beliefs/religions/etc. and see value in them- the value they add to the lives of those who are a part of them, and the value they add to others' through those people.

At a certain point, it doesn't matter if something is Objectively True. Oftentimes we don't know, or can't know- but that doesn't matter either. The obsession with objective truth is very much a white Western one, and it's done a lot of harm to people- entire cultures, even.

You can't be an econ major looking at this through the lens of hard numbers; you need to factor in human life, compassion, and context. It's not about who's right; it's about being a good person.

#atheism

[sh4tt3rg1rl]

TAOCC IS AMAZING, and boy has it changed since I first showed up

Aka: Elsie gets really sentimental for once

I’m gonna be honest, this is not the community I expected to end up in on this site. I joined Tumblr about October 29th and expected to end up as maaaaaybe a minor artist. At best. At the time TADC was just “that glitch thing that was blowing up that I thought was pretty good” and I was much more into murder drones anyways.

…Holy crabs, looking back on that…I had no idea what I was gonna end up getting into lol

I randomly followed the @/ragatha1 ask blog at one point, kind of confused as to what an ask blog was but hey, why not? That’s how I found Soup’s gangle blog and boy did things go off the rails. I was…so confused, I showed up smack dab in the middle of the Tiger insanity with no idea who any of these characters or people were. At that point iirc, “TAOCC” wasn’t even the name for the whole thing yet. I made Easton and was like “okay I’ll just have this goofy guy who likes sandwiches, no angst here, maybe he’ll make some friends, I really hope everyone likes him!”

BOY WAS I IN FOR A SURPRISE

I joined my first ever magma at that point as well! And I vividly remember being really confused but just doodling my sona in the corner and then people were like

“Uhhhh who the frick is Elsewhere I like your art :D”

and I was like

“Um

you what”

and thus I joined magma…a lot. Lol. That’s how I got to know soup and you (Xeya) and a few others. I felt so…weirdly new. Like impostor syndrome was in full force. That feeling hasn’t…really ever gone away, tbh.

And since then I’ve figured myself out mostly with only a few embarrassments to my name. I’m really grateful for the people I’ve made friends with, especially Fei, Star, Soup, and Xeya, as well as Kumo and Candy mods. You guys have been lovely to me, and I don’t know how I ever came to deserve that. It’s been rough at times, and I had to/still have to figure out boundaries and how to be assertive basically from scratch. This website still hurts me sometimes, and I accept that I’m a bit odd in some respects. But overall, people have respected that here much more than they do in my actual life. People have respected me here more than they tend to in real life. Before this I could share my writing and art with one person. One. I would go stir-crazy because I would make art and writing and never get to show anyone, which meant I just…spent like an entire year not doing anything. It sucked. And now I will just,..make art and characters for the funsies, and not get scolded for it. I can write incredibly florid descriptions and scenes about stuff like a freaking TOWN’S DESCRIPTION, and people will like it and tell me I’m good at this. I honestly might consider becoming a writer now when I become an adult. I learned that I can be shamelessly self indulgent when writing and people will enjoy it lol. Thank you guys for dealing with that btw lol. I will just MAKE CHARACTERS FOR PEOPLE FOR THE FUNSIES, a willingness I thought I’d all but lost. Like, I saw a 3d printer in my chem class two days ago and went “hmmm yunno what I could give a character in TAOCC a 3d printer for a head and that’d be so cool! Yunno, maybe Xeya would like it if I made that for her.” AND HERE WE ARE I’M CURRENTLY MAKING YOU A CHARACTER WITH A 3D PRINTER FOR A HEAD.

Also, you guys have no idea how grateful I am that you go along with my giant overarching plotlines. Like, my first test of the idea was Dusk’s domain and Sun’s trip to see Northeast, and then I was confident enough that people would care that I made the entire Lull/dungeon thing. The dungeon has been my magnum opus of writing, I put more work into that than almost anything else I’ve ever written. And people actually…respected that. I’m terrible at writing fight scenes, and yet I carried a fight scene for multiple hours with like…20 characters! I DIDN’T THINK I COULD HAVE TWO CHARACTERS FIGHT AND MAKE IT WORK AT ALL! OH MY LANDS I HAVE ACTUAL SELF CONFIDENCE NOW!! AAAAAAAAA-

anyways, that aside lol

it’s been wonderful, really. I feel like the pros far outweigh the cons for me, and the cons for me can be mitigated anyways entirely on my side of things lol. I came to this site looking for a community of people who would appreciate me, stupid flaws, autism, anxiety, writing and all. And I think I got that. And I want to find more, I want to keep going beyond this little bubble, but I want to always come back to this little circle of people. I don’t care how many rps or writing messes I end up in, TAOCC is always going to have a special place in my heart, flaws and all. It’s helped me get through some serious mess in my life, and being excited to come home to whatever insanity these lil guys are up to today makes me happy like almost nothing else.

From the bottom of my heart, thank you.

Thank you for letting this odd moth in, I hope I’ve earned it.

HELL YEAH YOUVE EARNED IT!!!

You've been literally one of the kindest people I've met on the site. One of the most talented too! I've never seen someone write like you and. Honestly. Genuinely. I look up to you in quite a few aspects.

You're funny, kind, caring, skilled, and a great person overall. and im SO FUCKING GLAD YOURE MY FRIEND EEEEE HUGS SPINS YOUUUU

... (kicks feet) and I heard something about a 3d printer head oc youre making for me.... (teary eyed) (/pos) (me when people do things for me. i love yall. sm. love you elsie sm sM SM SM SM SM!!!)

#xeyasks #LOVE YOOUUUU #HUGS

[nebulous-rain]

Hello! My name is Moriah and I am a junior in high school. I was wondering if I might be able to get your insight on a few questions I have?

I am in my final years of high school and am starting to think about college but I have no idea what I want to pursue. I know I love art, so for a long time I have been thinking about getting an art major or going to an art school.

I’m reaching out because I ABSOLUTELY LOVE YOUR ART and I think you are a very talented artist! I have been in love with your art for so long and I am curious and wondering how you are able to fit drawing into your life?

1.) If you are going to college for art, or went to college for art, what is it like? Do you think going to school for art or having an art major is worth it?

2.) how can I fit art into my everyday life? I’m sure you have work and other things to do in your life so how do you balance it out? (I just want to know how you can draw as much as you do!)

3.) do you do art as a hobby or a career? If it is a hobby how to you balance art, work/school, and home life? If it is a career or part-time career is it an alright source of income?

Thank you so much! And sorry if these questions might seem personal. I just want to know how other artist manage to draw and create their work and still have an adult life. Thanks again, and thank you for being a huge inspiration in my life to create the art I love! Your art means so much to me!❤️❤️ ❤️

i am going to CRY this is the sweetest message ever. i'm happy you found your niche and i'm even happier that i could help inspire that!!! i'm not sure if i'm gonna be able to answer all your questions, but i'll try to squeeze in some possibilities where i fall short:

1) growing up i definitely figured i was going to end up in art school because that's what everyone told me i should go into. but as i got older in high school i was kind of panicking cuz i really didn't want to turn my hobby into a job, and i figured out that i wanted to go into education!

but that's just me- my wife is actually going to college for graphic design sometime soon because she loves what she does. if it's something you really enjoy, and that you think you can monetize while still enjoying it, then it's definitely worth it! money is important but you need to put you and your happiness first.

2) to be honest, i haven't had the time or energy to do much art lately (if you look at my post dates you can see how spread out they've been the past year)- but this entirely depends on how you manage your time and your workload. i'm horrific at time management! so that's my problem. BUT, i think sneaking in drawing time in little ways helps a lot, as i tend to sketch small panels of a potential comic or animatic on notebooks and papers while i'm listening to lectures. i've even posted ms paint doodles i've drawn during class

i always have plans for what i'd like to draw once i have the time. it's kind of motivating, but also frustrating, and it's hard to efficiently empty my brain of ideas while still keeping up with everything else. this might be something you'll have to wiggle around once you get settled into a routine each semester!

3) i really wanted art to stay as a hobby for me. the idea of drawing and creating art every day for things i wasn't inspired to do made me really nervous, because what i really wanted was to make fanart and draw my little guys all day lol

if you take anything away from this, i think the most important thing is that if you want to keep art in your life, you will. if you desire having time to make art just for yourself, you'll find time to work that into your life, one way or another- but in order to do that you absolutely need to have a positive mindset about what you're going into, and if you can't find that positivity, maybe it isn't for you

thank you for asking!!! i'm not sure if this'll be any help, but i appreciate the questions <:')

#ask #moriah-doodles #me and my wife are just meesly 19 y/o's #so neither of us have experience working in the art field unfortunately #i wish you luck on your journey though!!!! #art can be so rewarding

[galar-abortion-clinic]

🍀🧠🥊🎓 For Jules, Mauly, and Rory! Just curious about these three!

(Jules is getting his own post since someone else asked about him, so stay tuned. Same twat time, same twat channel)

🍀 - What originally inspired the OC?

Conceptually, both Mauly and Rory are two sides of the same coin. At first I only had Mauly, but I decided to extract a few traits from her and squelch those out into their own character so that her personality wouldn’t feel so totally neutered by incompetence. She’s a little more idealized, whereas Rory is my worst fear of what I could turn out to be, or how other people might perceive me

Mauly is impulsive, brash, self-serving, and arrogant. She’s unapologetically angry, horny, and human. Rory is all of those things, but deeply insecure and constantly overcompensating. He’s pathetic and he makes me sick. Basically he boils down to “sid vicious if he were a bit less of a dick, purely because he’s subdued by cowardice”

Design-wise? Kalos’ rendition of the Punk Guy/Girl trainer class, man. I fell in love instantly. Also this one specific tank girl page:

Good shit

🧠 - What do you like most about the OC?

Mauly takes no shit. Sure, that might mean she leaves a bad taste in some people’s mouths, but she knows when she deserves to be treated better. Something I’ve always struggled with has been not standing up for myself because I’m worried it’ll hurt or inconvenience other people. Mauly says fuck those other people, It’s not my job to accommodate anyone else’s existence by minimizing my own. Her whole arc is about self-acceptance through ambivalence. “Even if i don’t love myself, i can’t change who I am. You’re not going to change me either, and you look stupid for trying”

Rory’s best use to me is catharsis. I’ve shoved all the shit I hate about myself into this guy and exaggerated it by queefzillion, and it feels reassuring to see him being knocked down a peg for behaving like a little wart. It also feels kind of nice when he still manages to find occasional kindness in spite of his many, many glaringly hideous flaws.

🥊 - What do they love to do? What do they hate to do?

Mauly was one of those kids who every adult in her life would describe as “so creative” and “a free spirit”, which is actually grown-up code for “this poor bastard’s gonna be a starving artist and we’re hiding our disappointment”. If she had the means to create more often, she’d have a lot of fun honing her craft and fully leaning into art as an outlet for her angst

Because she’s so hands-on and skilled at improvised patching and the like, she often gets stuck with repair responsibilities by the other schmucks she lives with. She doesn’t mind slapping duct tape over stuff several times over or whacking things with a hammer til it fits right, she just would prefer not being assigned that job by other people. Never tell her what to do

Rory’s nimble fingers don’t only make him a passable thief, but also a possibly-not-the-worst musician. He’s never played for anyone else, which might be why he kinda sucks, but it’s one of the few things he keeps to himself instead of bloating to give his delicate ego some padding. His songbook is loaded with edgy cringe, but its the sort of raw soul-bearing stuff that reminds you there’s a person in there. Not a great person, but a person

Anyway something he hates doing is uhhhhhh giving to charity,

🎓- How long have you had the OC?

Mauly’s been around ffffforrrrrr i wanna say maybe two years now? For a long time she was just an idea in my head, i didn’t wanna touch that idea til i knew exactly what i wanted to do with it

Rory’s my freshest OC, only been around for like a month. Not even. Could still use some fine tuning

Bonus: some VERY rough first drafts of Mauly that’re a little closer to the source material (excuse the positively grimy state of the paper, i dont take very good care of my sketchbooks)

#sewageposting #pokemon oc #sparky’s kennel: rory #sparky’s kennel: mauly

[ellen-shame]

Ten Opening Lines

thanks for the tag, @yabagofmilfs and sorry it's taken me soooo long to do!

Rules: list the first line of the last ten (10) stories you published. Look to see any patterns you notice yourself, and see if anyone else notices any.

I have not yet published ten stories so I'll do some WIPs too!

(you and me) supersede - 'Sid can’t stop pacing around the covering bed.'

2. (begging for a piece of that) bubble - 'Sid tosses his robe on the ottoman at the foot of the bed and stands gloriously naked as he pokes around trying to find his sleep shirt.'

3. Gentle Violence

'r/penguins

4/3/2010 u/UserMcLoser Rumours that Malkin is scent marking Crosby on the reg?? Apparently it’s an open secret in the league that Malkin’s courting Crosby… View full post ⬆️90'

4. Reverenced Helplessness - '“Hot in here, eh?” Sid says.'

5. (this is how you make yourself) vanish into nothing - 'Maybe it starts like this:'

6. (wow wow wow wow) that's low brow - 'Six weeks after they start - dating? hooking up? having sex every night and sleeping next to each other every night and saying things like God, you’re really beautiful in bed, not like every night but not infrequently either -

(- which is like six and a half weeks after Jamie says with incredible, gorgeous, amazing casualness that he’s into men as well as women -)

(- and like six weeks and two days after Jamie becomes the first person Trevor ever comes out to on purpose, as in like, for the sake of being open and honest as opposed to for the sake of I think we’re about to jerk each other off but I don’t want you to punch me if I’ve misjudged the vibe -)

(- well like, not that Trevor totally wasn’t thinking that coming out to Jamie on purpose might increase the chances of them jerking each other off, because that’s also six weeks and a half weeks after Trevor realises with all the abruptness of an elevator wooshing down and leaving your stomach in your chest that he finds Jamie incredibly attractive -)

(- so anyway, six weeks and two days after Trevor says to him, I think I might be gay, and then really hates that might and decides it doesn’t count unless you do the thing properly and adds, I mean. I think I probably am, and Jamie says, Okay -)

(- which is to say, six weeks after Trevor spends two days dancing around Jamie, getting wound tighter and tighter, chest pounding, lowkey feeling like he’s about to puke, wondering if it’s all in his head or if he’s right to think Jamie’s also dancing around him, and then they go up to their roof to watch the sunset and both turn to each other at the same time and kiss like they’d planned it and Trevor’s head explodes -)

- anyway, six weeks after that, Jamie calls from the bathroom one morning that he’s thinking about growing a moustache.'

7. (WIP) steelheart - 'Geno was supposed to be back at 8, but at 8.06 he texts Sid sorry late.'

8. (WIP) (don't look at me, you've got a) girl at home - 'Nolan is sleeping less nowadays.'

9. (WIP) (i'm gonna pop your) bubblegum heart - 'Auston has been put on baby-sitting duty.'

10. (WIP) Encyclopaedia - 'There's a new guy in Auston's adult literacy class.'

Comments: Hmm, I think I have a tendency to start with short little sentences that sound fairly everyday and unremarkable, but which quickly lead into the main issue of the fic. However, I definitely played around with different forms outside my comfort zone in these fics - the most obvious examples being vanish into nothing and that's low brow. My favourite might be vanish into nothing because I really enjoy writing that self-consciously plays with the fact that it is writing. I also remember really wrestling with the opening of that's low brow, very aware that I was doing something very much outside my usual style, but trying to capture the maelstrom of feelings and experiences Trevor had just gone through.

Let me know if you spot any other habits of mine! I love talking about writing.

#my fic #my writing

[a-sentient-horax]

Wednesday, January 17, 2024

First day back to class! My boyfriend was able to stay home with the puppy, but we are going to have to start finding people willing to watch him over the next four weeks, which I haven't begun yet but is going to not be fun.

I still haven't heard anything back from more than just the one law school I got into, and the one that I was waitlisted for. I have literally so much to do. Ugh. I had to go to my yearly eye exam so I could get contacts. Well that was a $500 expense that I was not ready for. I have to pay my car insurance like, right now like right after I post this. That's gonna be a cool $300 so, there goes all that Christmas money. And then, of course, school I have to pay for.

I am a bundle of nerves, I'm very busy and I have no money. Ugh.

[EDIT] Ok I am back a few hours later. I have a little more time now so I'll write a little more. I did pay my insurance (booooo) but I also found out that my boyfriend has a bunch of credits for Amazon (yaaaaaay). His chair recently broke and so he's using a lawn chair until we can get a new one for him. It's actually not that bad tbh. He got that lawn chair a year or two ago and spent some money to get a really good one that is comfortable and can hold his weight. It has cupholders as well and tbh it's not a bad solution for an office chair. Anyway, I told him to use the Amazon credits for a chair for himself. Whatever is left over maybe I will use for me, maybe I will save it for next Christmas now that I know that is an option lol.

First two classes of the day are done, which is stellarrrrrr. For one of my classes I have to download Unity. It is a programming video games class which I admittedly took because it sounded easy and now I am actually excited for it.

Speaking of, I really, really, really want to spend this year dedicating more time to my friends and my hobbies. However, it's difficult for me to form healthy habits around both of those things. So, I am on a bit of a journey right now to look for some tools or maybe just ways to help me. I know it sounds silly or like, idk like im an asshole. But i forget to text people back. And its really, really bad. I feel like a horrible friend, I lose friendships because of it. It's not like I'm purposefully forgetting to text them or that I don't think about my friends. I just, I get a text and im overwhelmed or I'm not ready to answer or I'm just not in the right headspace and so I think "I'll answer it later" and suddenly two weeks have gone by and the person I genuinely enjoyed and wanted to talk to thinks I hate them. So, yeah. I'm trying to be better, I am. It's difficult, and I would love a tool that would help me lol.

I did pay my insurance also. Even though spending large amounts of money and official adult things like insurance make me want to throw up.

#journal

[dragonofeternal]

So this year has been really, really good in terms of like... reminding/validating that I'm actually like smart and good at what I do?

Like.

First off, I got my new job which whips ass and is super fun and challenging and pays way better and where my ability to do nine million different things is like very valuable. Like oh yeah, I can reformat this word doc/that powerpoint. Do you want me to do a little bit of graphic design to make this actually look nicer? Oh, you need this video for a presentation but it's on a site other than youtube? Yeah sure, I'll rip it for you. And also just the day-to-day of being able to take good notes, and being able to help copyedit training materials, and generally being a pleasant and mostly on top of things person in the office.

THEN, I took one of Killian's creative writing classes along with them. Which, for one thing, was super fun, good teacher, nice to have an organized space/time to hang out and talk about writing. But also it was really validating to have someone outside of the internet/my inner circle of friends read and critique my work who was like... I dunno another adult/serious writer type person? Our teacher is a published poet -- Though more specifically she's prolific as a TRANSLATOR of poetry. A fair number of the translated Palestinian poets you've seen being posted around tumblr recently are most certainly her work. -- and when she realized the level I was writing at she started critiquing my work a lot harder. Still had nice stuff to say! Just also being willing to dig in and point out places where I could improve.

We actually hung out with her last night at a fellow classmate's band's show and she took both me and Killian aside for expanded critique/thoughts on our final pieces, and said some really nice stuff which included that she sees both of us as like professional-grade writers who should continue to hone their craft and who she really wants to see succeed/get shit published/etc. I'm currently letting a short story (that is... probably gonna end up as a novella orz) that I wrote for class sit before I do another draft of it, and then she's offered to do a more critical line edit for me so I can shop it around and get it published somewhere really good.

(Which is also interesting because I see myself as working very much in genre spaces and she's very in the "literary" sort of mode, and she said that she saw a lot of literary prowess and style in how I wrote which she could see getting it published in a more literary type journal. And that's like a weird/wild thought bc of my complicated thoughts on the way the literary/publishing world looks at and treats genre writing blah blah blah....)

At the SAME show, though, our teacher had brought along a friend, who is also a teacher at the community college. Said friend works for the theatre department and recognized me from volunteering to act at a one-day event last semester for Killian's playwriting class. Like this was an event where I was acting for MAYBE a grand total of fifteen minutes. And she basically said "HEY YOU'RE REALLY GOOD, WHY HAVEN'T I SEEN YOU AT ANY OF THE AUDITIONS?" So then I chatted with her some about how I've done a lot of theatre over the years but time/jobs/money meant I haven't had a chance to in a long time...

But now my job is a 9-5! So I gave her my number and I'm now basically the understudy for if/when someone drops out of the productions currently going on. Apparently they have a lot of issues with people dropping suddenly so it's likely that I'll end up doing something next semester! Which is good cuz like. Damn, do I love the theatre, and I've missed it A LOT.

I dunno just having two different people being really impressed about my creative work in a short time was really, really mood/ego boosting? I dunno. When I last did theater in Pittsburgh I ended up feeling really burnt out by the exhausting sense of always having to hunt for work, feeling like I wasn't good enough, etc... And last year I was struggling a lot with feeling like all my writing was futile/unwanted/etc... So having people remember me and be super complimentary was. Nice.

#state of the liz #long post under cut

[aline-the-cat]

WangXian Twilight AU

Cangse Sanren and Wei Changze send their son Wei Wuxian to Caiyi so he can study in the prestigious Cloud Recess University, he reunites there with his cousins Jiang Cheng and Jiang Yanli and makes friends with Nie Huaisang, the first day is normal and all, with the only weird thing being Huaisang warning him about a student, Lan something. Wei Wuxian doesn't pay attention. Big Mistake

He enters one of his classes and there, sittting next to the only sit available, is the most handsome man ever. Wei Wuxian would be swooing except he also has the meanest glare of all. Literally the guy is killing with his golden eyes (golden eyes?). Wei Wuxian being the sun he is, tries to have a conversation with the stranger to no avail, as soon as the bell rings, the guy practically runs out of the classroom, not without sending his way another killing glare

Later, Wei Wuxian will hear him trying to change his schedule (really, whats up with this guy?!)

During lunch the next day he finally learns who the fuddy duddy is thanks to Nie Huaisang: "I told you to not get on his bad side!!! Didnt I told you???"

Wwx "I don't know, maybe?? Who is he?"

Enter the five most fashionable people Wei Wuxian has ever seen (and he has live with aunt Yu and Jiang Yanli)

Wwx "okay, who are they???"

Cue Jiang Cheng groaning next to him

NHS "The Lans and the Jins, their families supposedly have been friends for centuries, and the Lans adopted the Jins after their father died, or so I heard, they are mostly together and they keep them to themselves, they are extremely hot and the only ones worth of their time are Da-ge and Yanli-jie apparently

"And do they have names or I just go 'hot 1, hot 2, sexy 1, sexy 2 and gorgeous?" Wwx doesnt realize the young adults are smirking, and one is frowning

Jiang Cheng sighs and unwillingly enters the conversation

"The one that looks like a peacock is Jin Zixuan, Jie likes him for some reason and has been the only person he has talk to that we know, the one next to him with the ridiculous but cute beanie is Jin Ziyao..."

"Da-ge kinda likes him and has manage to talk to him on several ocasions or so I've heard" Nie Huaisang interrupts

"Yes, they are brothers, the one sitting next to them is Luo Quingyan, I think she is their cousin" Wei Wuxian nods appreciatively at Jiang Cheng's words, she is hot "The tall one is Lan Xichen, he is...."

"Hot, handsome, nice, gentleman, friendly and everything good in this word??" Huaisang probes, and to Wei Wuxian surprise and amusement, A-Cheng blushes

"Shut up Huaisang! I never said that!!" He tries so hard not to scream that is hilarious "stop saying nonesense or I'll break your fucking legs!" The younger Nie just dies of laughter next to him, also trying not to be too loud, Wei Ying notices with curiosity "I was gonna say that Lan Xichen is the head of the student council"

"And gorgeous?" Wei Ying asks, prompting A-Cheng's eyebrow to quirk

"He is Lan Wangji, Lan Xichen's younger sibling and the head of discipline around campus, his punishments are lengendary so you really dont want to get on his bad graces"

Wei Wuxian openly laughs delighted, a beautiful sound that makes the younger Lan freeze for a moment

"I think thats a little bit too late A-Cheng, Im pretty sure he hates me already... but thats okay, I'll be his friend in no time!"

Jiang Cheng groans as Nie Huaisang looks at him in awed

For Wei Wuxian, the year just got much more interesting

#listen I know I have been reading more twilight hc lately #but hear me out #wangxian #twilight au #wei wuxian #wei ying #lan wangji #lan zhan #vampire lan wangji #vampire lan zhan #human wei wuxian #human wei ying #jin zixuan #jiang cheng #nie huaisang #luo qingyang #jiang yanli #lan xichen #lan huan #jin guangyao #meng yao #nie mingjue #nieyao #xuanli #xicheng #kinda #vampire au #vampire diaries vibes

[hwaitham]

waaaa it makes mi so happi to hear tht u’ve been rllie happi ! ! ! ‘ve actually been feeling vrie accomplished recently ! just feels like ‘ve been able to get so much work done 4 m classes ! which is somethimf i struggle wif an embarrassing amount . . heh . speaking of doing work for classes tho , i dn’t think ‘ve evr told u bfore but ‘ la petite fille de la mer ’ has become m token study song ! ! i only learned abt dis piece through ur bloggie but m so glad i did <3 ‘s vrie nice 2 listen to while i study bcos i cn’t rllie tell wen it ends n restarts so like . i hv no idea how much time passes while m doing sometjing which i s’ppose cld b a downside but idk ! n anyway i thimk ‘ve trained m brain to hv da motivation 2 study wen m listening to it . . ( i hv no idea how brains work so i dunno if m jus making thimgs up but like . wtv ! ) i find that it puts mi in da right headspace 4 studying if dat makes sense . . ? but ya ! i hv been Okiez ! ( i jus texted m best fwen earlier todai after basically ghosting her for 3 monfs n then 1.5 months n she’s seen it but hasn’t responded yet so m tryin not to thimk abt it aaaa i miss her idk why i hv’t been texting her (⸝⸝o̴̶̷᷄ o̴̶̷̥᷅⸝⸝ ྀི) i rllie hope we hvn’t fallen out of sync wif each othr . . ‘s gna b okie tho trust )

++ omgiez i too am looking forward 2 spring a bunnie bunchez ! n chara reruns too ! i believe your haiyi will come home 2 uuuu ! ! ! if anipaw deserves haitham cons , ‘s coco ! mhm mhm ! n yisyis i saw boff’ arlecchino n boothill ! ! i dn’t think m gna roll for either of them bcos their designs dn’t appeal to mi as much ? but if arlecchino’s gameplay is supa fun to mi i might consider hehe ! there’re also jus lotsa charas i wanna pull for on reruns ! i hv neuvi at c0r1 but m gna go for his c1 + i wnna get furina her sword ! also waiting for a wrio rerun bcos i uh . skipped him on release ᑦ( ◞ ⸝⸝ ◟ ྀི)ᐣ LOL . n re : hsr i rolled 4 both jing yuan + sparkle dis phase ! ! i cn’t rllie believe i managed to get them both but m so happi i did hehe

++ on da off chance u’ve nvr heard it , m gna rec u shostakovich’s the gadfly suite , op. 97a : viii romance <3 i wonder wat th violin solo melody wld sound like on cello ooo i bet it’d b positively magical . . .

ilu 5eviez n beyond u sweet angel girl <3 — 🌷

m beloved rosebud ,

huwwo sweetest bbie — i do hope u're having a splendid weekend so far ! ! ◟꒰ྀི◍ ´꒳` ◍꒱◞ 💝🍀 what did u get up to?? tell me all about it if u wanna :D feeling accomplished is one of the best feelings in m vrie humble opinion . . u feel joy + free + an entire weight off your shoulder + all the more capable that u cn do it again . . . i too struggle far 2 much w staying focused n getting work done in a reasonable amnt of time , so im vvv happie for u rosebud ! ! ♡ n ‘ la petite fille de la mer ’ ! ! oooh im so glad u find it to b a good study song , bcos i do too heehee :3 a staple study song for sure . . i find there isn't rllie any climax to it n it is rather repetitive in it's melody so it makes it easy to focus on other tasks while listening to it ! n Yes i sooo agree w u when u say u can't rllie tell how much time has passed listening to it ^__^

re : ur best fwiend texting sitch . . has she responded ? if not — give it some time but if it worries u then maybe reach out to her again ! ! if she's a good friend then she'll understand the reasoning for late replies . . we r all adults w vrie busy personal lives n maintaining friendships at this age shouldnt require so much effort as consistently texting u kno :C at least . . dis is how i feel . . ! i do hope things work out for u ! ! ♡♡

n' oooo ! did u see arlecchino's burst animation leaks . . 0////0 i wasnt rllie considering wishing for her but that animation js hv changed Everything for mi LOL$&^*)$(# jk . kidding . actually Nothing cn pry mi away frm haitham's arms it's alwys gonna be him >>>> . . good luck on ur neuvie + furina weapon + wriwri pulls ! ! i think bcos . . u r d sweetest girl in da world , they will come home to u ^__^ u must belieeeeeve it is true ! i sure do :3 ! ! n YIPPEE ON GETTING YUANNIE + SPARKLE ! truth b told . . i deleted hsr frm m phone a few weeks ago ๐·°(৹˃̵﹏˂̵৹)°·๐ it was js taking up too much space on m phone for an app dat i barely ever open . u know :C hoping i cn get back into it when i hv more free time !♡

n shostakovich stoppp omgie i faintly remember playing one of his suites in high school but i hv never listened to the gadfly suite ! ! i had the piece u rec'd playing as i typed up m litl love letter to u hehe — went straight into m playlist ! :D i love it so much thanku for thinking of mi + recommending it waaah ! ! !

anywhosies . sigh . sorrie i talked so much . . i never seem to kno when to close m mouth when im chatting wif u hehe ! sending u a piece of m heart w this letter — i hope u cn feeling the love radiating frm it ! ! ૮꒰๑´ `๑꒱ა

#( ˶˘ ³˘(｡˃ ᵕ ˂｡ ྀི) #making sure rosebud is d last person i tlk to before going zZzZ . . so that i may meet u in m dreams 2nigh :3 ⭐️ ! ! #pwz come visit !