#i mean i could incorporate it into the story somehow

[yakkitylylac]

hash tag writer struggles be like

#IF HORNET IS 15 WHEN THE INFECTION RETURNS THEN THAT MEANS THERES LIKE A 14-15 YR GAP BETWEEN THE TWO WAVES OF INFECTION #AND ERNESR IS LIKE 11 OR 12 WHEN LURIEN BECOMES A DREAMER #MAKING HIM #CHECKS CALCULATOR #27 #WHEN LURIEN GETS REVIVED #WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #LIKE IM SURE I CAN ADAPT TO THIS BUT LIKE IVE NEVER REALLY THOUGHT MUCH ABOUT WHAT ERNEST IS LIKE AS AN ADULT #I NEED MORE EXCUSES TO WRITE PARENT CHILD FLUFF NOOOOOOOOO #i mean i could incorporate it into the story somehow #like with lurien being all "oh geez i really missed out on your entire childhood/teenage years didnt i haha. sits in a corner and cries #hhh #WRITING IS HARD! #brambles #hk #generation loss

[jimmy-dipthong]

How long will the japanese wikipedia article for goncharov last?

And how big is the internet, really?

I was in a wikipedia hole recently and I happened to notice that the Japanese article for Goncharov is the only language variant that is completely in-character.

Every other language specifies it as “Goncharov (meme)”. Japanese lists it as “Goncharov (1973 film)”, and formats the introduction as if it were a real movie:

Goncharov is a 1973 mafia film set in Naples, Italy. Produced by Martin Scorsese, the main cast includes Robert De Niro, Al Pacino, John Cazale, Gene Hackman, Cybill Shepherd, and Harvey Keitel.

— Wikipedia (my translation)

The rest of the article does go on to acknowledge Tumblr’s influence in Goncharov’s popularity, but every mention of this influence frames it as reviving the popularity of the supposedly real film. On two occasions the word 再燃 is used (the first kanji means “again” and the second kanji means “burn” - it means “rekindle” and can be similarly used in the metaphorical and literal sense, just like the english word “rekindle”).

Goncharov became particularly popularity on social media as a result of a reblog of a Tumblr post in August 2020. The post depicted shows the title of the film (Goncharov) in place of a brand logo on a shoe, which were described as “knockoff boots”. The image post and the comment attached to the reblog, mocking the fact that the original poster had not seen the film, became an internet meme. In November 2022, a poster made by a fan of Goncharov was uploaded to the internet, and the film’s popularity resurged. Various fan-made content about the story and production began to spread on Tumblr and other platforms. Goncharov has been widely covered in the media as an example of how fandom is born on the internet, with many prominent figures, including Scorsese himself, leaving comments.

— Wikipedia (my translation)

It’s clear the article is trying to adapt the real history of the meme and incorporate it as much as possible into the fictional history of the film. The rest follows quite similarly, and includes more analysis of how Tumblr culture created the “reignited” popularity, how Elon’s acquisition of Twitter resulted in an exodus of users to Tumblr which may have contributed to the increased awareness of the “movie”, etc. Though most of it is directly translated from the english, enough of it is original (such as the attempts to reconcile both real and fictional histories) that I suspect the article’s current state is intentional.

To get back to my initial question, how long will this article last like this?

Remember the whole Scots Wikipedia debacle? An american teenager had basically used simple word replacement to translate over 23,000 articles into Scots. Some people noticed this, but not many, and not loudly enough. It was only after a well researched reddit post pointed out the scale of the damage that people really took notice and action was taken. The wikipedia editor had apparently been doing this for 7 years before the reddit post was made.

If 20,000 articles could go largely unnoticed for 7 years, I imagine a single article could easily evade similar detection. Realistically, how many Japanese speakers are going to even hear about Goncharov and make it to the wikipedia article? Then, how many of them are going to do more googling and find out it’s all a hoax (or know already)? THEN, how many of them are going to tell a wikipedia admin that the article is a lie, or publicise it somehow in a way that forces the editors to update the article?

I think the reality is that although the internet may appear to be a massive open town square (or several), it also has side streets, and side streets of side streets. I feel like the number of active members in each online hobby or interest group are really quite small, and then they get divided between platforms, and even further divided into subgroups. I think if one decided it was something one wanted to do, it would be quite easy to become one of the most prevalent members of any online community you chose just by devoting the time and energy to it.

It’s also kind of shocking how much internet content is inaccessible on account of it being in a different language. English reigns supreme in terms of sheer volume, but there is original research and journalism and entertainment and art in every language, that hasn’t and might never be translated into english. For example, I found it very difficult to find any english sources or research for my post about the evolving conjugation of 違う, but I easily found several japanese papers and websites. In fact, if you google “違くない adjective or verb”, the first english result that doesn’t just handwave it as “informal” or “slang” is a tumblr blog with my post on it!

It’s a small internet indeed where my little hobby language blog is, according to google, the prevailing english source on what is quite a remarkable change in Japanese grammar that’s been happening since the 80s.

I think the Japanese unreality version of the Goncharov wikipedia article will stand for many years to come.

(below link shows the article at time of writing)

#langblr #japanese #japanese language #language #goncharov #the internet #long post #essay #日本語 #jimmy blogthong

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Remember the Pokémon trainer ask with having pokepastas in their team? Could I maybe request something angsty?~ basically can I get headcanons of Arven and Kieran’s reaction to finding out Trainer got in a accident and was suffering from VERY lethal injuries and in panic missingno..basically messed them up into a pokepasta trainer,kinda corpse looking and now in never ending pain because of the raw wounds that never fully Heal but ofc take medication to numb the pain down and look out now for they’re friends so they don’t suffer the same fate? :))

Oh btw have a nice day or night!!! Remember to drink water!

Arven

From the moment he, Penny, and Nemona discovered your team enjoying a picnic...he always wondered how you got something like Missingno on your side.

But since it nearly corrupted his damn pokedex trying to just get information on it AND you were reluctant to share your past, he figured you'd just say "don't ask questions you don't want answers to" and end the convo right there.

He definitely wouldn't let Mabosstiff near it.

Last time he went near a Pokémon nobody should've known about...he almost lost his companion.

From time to time, he catches glimpses of your wounds (not during picnics ofc), bandages, and the medication Nurse Miriam prescribed to you, and suggests you save some of the herbs for yourself.

And they do help with your pain management when incorporated into tea or sandwiches (especially the salty herba mystica, which relieves your aches for a little while).

They're not miracle cures, but it's something.

Eventually, there comes a point where you know Arven wants to understand how you acquired Missingno, why you have so many ghastly Pokémon by your side, and why you were determined to defend him and the others down in Area Zero.

So you sit down and explain how you found it by accident in Kanto, caught it, and realized it was simply a lonely creature who wanted a trainer it could love and protect. Like any other Pokémon.

Yet you didn't realize the extreme lengths it would go to achieve that goal....until you nearly suffered a lethal wild Pokémon attack (it was in the dead of night, and you were ambushed while chasing after what you thought was a shiny).

You were bleeding out, bones broken and gaping wounds all over your body, and unconsciously begged for help-

And Missingno somehow heeded your call, escaping its pokeball and reviving you.

But in doing so, you were brought back as a zombie..one who still remembers the pain of that night and often cursed the glitch for not letting you die.

In time though you've made peace with it, knowing you were stuck this way now and it wouldn't let you go...

To the point where it erased its own pokeball from existence and became a constant presence around you, invisible aside from a few occasional glitch particles.

Yet you knew Missingno didn't mean any ill intent--all it wanted to do was save you.

Now you vowed to save others so they didn't suffer the same fate as you, whether that be haunted Pokémon left abandoned in some town or atop a mountain or your human friends in Area Zero.

Your pains aren't as severe now thanks to the meds, and you're grateful for Arven introducing you to herba mystica.

You were afraid he was gonna be freaked out by your story (or not believe you), but..while he finds it horrific and sad at first, he understands you better and is simply glad you're here now.

He's also happy to help his buddy manage their pain better, even if the remedies are only temporary.

Kieran

You had to bandage and conceal a great deal of your wounds so nobody at BB Academy got concerned, with DISABLED giving you a consistent best Heal Pulse to ensure your chronic pain wasn't debilitating).

Even so, Kieran assumes you got better over the past year and is desperate to battle you and win Missingno..something he vowed to acquire after realizing he'll never get Ogerpon.

You try explaining that it's literally impossible for you to surrender it, and it's too dangerous to bring it into a battle anyway, but he thinks you're just lying to him again and bragging.

In the back of his mind, though...he kept wondering why you had so many injuries..

Ofc..he's too focused on being stronger than you to ask you.

But after seeing Missingno come out (in its Fossil Aerodactyl form) and literally glitch Terapagos' beam out of existence and use Cut on multiple falling rocks---he was amazed.

You finally invite him to your dorm to talk after the mochi mayhem events, knowing he deserved some answers.

He sees the pain meds littered all over your countertop, and you finally reveal to him why you need those, why you look the way you do, and why you keep Missingno around:

Basically, after catching and befriending it, you got attacked by some wild Pokémon, and they would've left you for dead had it not intervened.

You made it feel loved, cherished, never using it as a weapon or an infinite item dispenser...and it couldn't watch you bleed to death.

So it saved your life, but it came with a great cost: neverending physical pain with your wounds never fully healing.

You used to curse Missingno for not letting you go, trying to release it several times to no avail, and just being miserable in general.

Yet once you realized it attracted more misunderstood, tortured, and damaged Pokémon to your side..you came to forgive it, knowing it was just like them despite its uncanny appearance: a creature who just wanted to protect its trainer.

Now you take medication (and a few leaves of herba mystica) to numb the pain down, so it didn't hurt as much as it did before.

You wouldn't want anybody to have a brush with death like you did. Not even your worst enemy.

That's why you went so far to protect your friends in Area Zero, especially Kieran.

After hearing your story, he felt so torn up and guilty--and convinced he was being "overdramatic".

You were still suffering all along, for years..and he had no idea, only thinking about himself and his selfish ways and how his pain couldn't possibly compare to-

But you stop your friend from spiraling, holding him and letting him cry out all of his renewed guilt, telling him that his own suffering was valid, too.

He was starting to look like a corpse with the dark circles and paler complexion....and it scared you.

Seems like he took "I wanna be like you" a bit too literally.

But you're glad Missingno saved you--otherwise you never would've gotten the chance to meet him and help him become more confident in himself (ofc you wish things were different before and didn't require you shattering his confidence first).

Since that conversation, Kieran starts taking better care of himself and makes a promise to protect you.

Not from physical threats per se as you're basically immortal, but from rude stares and whispers of how "creepy" you are.

He tends to hug you a lot and lend you his jacket for warmth if you ever get cold in class or in the polar biome.

It does help with the chills you get so often, and makes you feel grateful that you two were still friends despite everything.

#we are baaaaack with pokepastas #clanask #anonymous #pokemon x reader #pokemon sv x reader #pokemon scarlet x reader #pokemon violet x reader #pokemon arven #pokemon kieran #pokepasta x reader #missingno #tw death #tw body horror #headcanons #platonic

[pianocat939]

…

(I ended up studying for like 5 hours today on foreign language idk why, but yeah- I’ll try to get a request done. And start on Ch. 1 of monster series)

I make way too many alternates but…

Just listen.

Mean girl Donnie.

Tw: implied/explicit threatening, implied bribery maybe?, very disorganized thoughts, blackmailing, controlling behaviour, degradation, please read with caution just cuz’ the relationship is pretty toxic…in a controlling way

Like not the popularized, blonde and have a group kind of mean girl-

I mean like…

Super smart and super rich Mean girl Donnie.

He’s on the way to valedictorian, (and will be). He has a lot of power within the school, whether it’s being leader of multiple clubs or a student president.

He’s super fucking rich. (Somehow…) He’s wearing Dior, Prada, Saint Laurent, Swarovski, Burberry- Anything you can imagine of luxury.

He never looks bad. Ever. He’s always looking perfect. He could be wearing a really dashing purple suit and loafers one day. And another day be wearing hot pink and white sweater and skirt- like he wears all kinds of clothes. But he never looks bad.

He doesn’t have a minion group. He solely believes in his independence. [His brothers…he doesn’t put much notice on them, he’s a more notable being]

Let’s say MC is like. Just there. Not unpopular or popular…just there.

Their life is pretty mundane until they accidentally bump into Donnie while he was fixing his- idk lipstick or eyebrows- causing it to go wild on his face.

He’s immediately offended, confronting them why they have the audacity to ruin his perfect makeup/brows.

[his appearance (feminine or masculine) changes every day so either situation works]

MC ends up getting a life of hell from then on.

Wether they’re accused by teachers for no reason, or wondering why their friends or more on edge when talking to them. Their school life isn’t exactly hell…but isn’t great either.

At some point, they can’t tolerate it and ask Donnie what he did. Only to end up unraveling a horror story of a dictator.

He’s blackmailing them, threatening that he’ll expose it to everyone, and anything. (MC didn’t even do such a thing, he just managed to fake it).

Poor MC can’t help but accept his deal by being his “minion” for the next month.

In the morning, MC has to basically chauffeur Donnie to school, in a flashy ass Bugatti.

They have to carry all his stuff, and follow him around. They can’t go through their normal schedule, they have to follow his.

They have to participate at all his extracurricular events, meetings, whatever.

.

.

.

Until a few weeks later, the things they have to do change.

They have to wear the clothes he’s picked out for them on whatever day. [it’s always matching in colour or style with his]

They have to call him any form of endearments he wants. And gets pissed if they don’t.

[Now I know he isn’t for physical touch, but for the sake of the alternate bear with me]

On days he wears lipstick, he covers them in kisses on their face, staining their cheeks all over. And they can’t take it off, because of his annoyance. So the entire school knows.

They have to follow EXACTLY the same schedule as him, even outside of school. Like…maybe not doing the exact same thing, but waking up, sleeping, and all like the daily things have to be aligned with his.

They have to call him every night and talk with him…keep him company. (Which MC soon realizes Donnie actually thinks of MC as a significant other, just in a controlling way.) He gets quite lovey-dovey during the midnight calls.

“MC…you’re the only person I like touching at all~ I mean…you look so stupid walking around covered in my lipstick stains hihi~…”

They sleep over at his house every weekend- they’re just basically incorporated into his life.

…

By the end of the month, the entire school just considers MC as Donnie’s lover…and MC can’t deny the title no matter what. The school believes Donnie more than MC.

——————————————————

(This brain rot turned out a lot longer than I thought oops-)

You know, we got rich mean girl Donnie,

How about Dumb Pink Squad Leo? Like, the actual stereotypical mean girls.

- Celina

(I need help from my thoughts lmao)

#rottmnt #tmnt #yandere #yandere rottmnt #yandere x reader #rottmnt x reader #yandere tmnt #tmnt x reader #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #donnie x reader #yandere donnie

[mirai-e-jump]

TV Guide Dan Vol.50, January 2024 Issue ft. Ohsama Sentai King-Ohger Cast Members Sakai Taisei x Masato Yano Interview (translations below)

Publication: January 26, 2024

"Please introduce the character the other is playing in Ohsama Sentai King-Ohger."

Sakai: Yano-san plays Racules Husty, the big brother of Gira Husty, who I play. At first, we were led to believe that he was a bad guy who hurt his citizens, but unknown to Gira, he was carrying a huge burden on his shoulders, and was deliberately behaving in a way that made him look like that. Gira may have lost his childhood memories, but I think he respected Racules in those days, and even now is of great importance to Gira.

Yano: Gira is the younger brother of Racules, but at the same time, he's a mysterious being. Somehow, he can communicate with the Shugods…For the rest of the story, it felt like he was moving forward with innocence, but gradually, he gained leadership, moved the hearts of those around him, and became the driving force for the previously broken up Royal Sentai to become one. Furthermore, he's also been gaining more and more dignity as the new king, and now he and Racules have resolved their differences and are fighting together.

"Outside of your roles as brothers, what's the relationship between you two like?"

Yano: (with a solemn expression) We normally don't get along very well.

Sakai: (with a straight face) We fight alot.

Sakai & Yano: (laughs).

Yano: No, we're just joking. That's not the case at all.

Sakai: Yano-san takes very good care of me. He cares about me, asking, "Are you eating properly?," and also gives me advice on acting.

Yano: I'm not offering anything major. I just say, "Here's what I'm doing."

Sakai: For example, in running scenes, Yano-san breathes loudly with, "Haa, haa" to make the sound easier to pick up. Since Gira has many running scenes, I try to incorporate this in my own way.

Yano: I believe that each actor has their own way of creating emotion, so I often talk about the technical aspects. For example, it's better not to blink during important scenes, as it could distract the viewers. If there's no dialogue in a scene where you're close to a character's face, I'd suggest that you express your feelings by clenching your teeth or swallowing saliva.

Sakai: He teaches me these things in a way that's easy to understand. Furthermore, Yano-san has so many variations to his performance! He's always been a great help.

"Speaking of, what do you usually call each other?"

Sakai: I call him "Aniki."

Yano:…You've never called me that once though.

Sakai: Ahaha! Just now, I got scared~.

Yano: I immediately started thinking about the best way to respond to your joke.

Sakai: Actually, it's "Yano-san."

Yano: For me, it's "Sakai". Sometimes I call him "Taisei." Like when we go out to eat.

Sakai: It makes me happy to be called Taisei by Yano-san. From now on, I want you to call me Taisei!

Yano: You prefer Taisei?

Sakai: Yeah, but Sakai is fine too. I've been called that since I worked together with Yano-san in the drama "Shinyu wa Akujo."

Yano: Everyone called him Taisei, but I intentionally chose Sakai.

Sakai: Eh? Was it to make me feel special?! I'm so happy~!

Yano: Well…that's right! (laughs). What does Ikeda Masashi call you by?

Sakai: You mean by everyone?

Yano: Why'd you respond like that? (laughs). Sakai is like this, and sometimes I can't get through to him. The other day he asked, "What did you eat for dinner?" and when I answered, about 3 minutes later, he asked me the same question again.

Sakai: I wanted him to respond with, "How many times have you asked that?!" (*he wanted to do a bit with Yano)

Yano: Absolutely not. I could tell by your face. Sakai has a different kind of expression when he's like that.

Sakai: Eh? So you can understand such subtle changes! Yano-san is the mood maker on set. When he's on standby in front of the cameras for a monologue scene, he makes strange faces right up until the actual performance (laughs).

Yano: Hey, hey, that makes it seem like I don't take my job seriously! Well, it is true that I make strange faces (laughs).

"We've heard from your co stars that Yano-kun is lonely, and that he posts the most in the King-Ohger cast's group LINE…"

Yano: It's a misunderstanding. There's a reason for that. It's a common occurrence among actors, but even if you create a group LINE with your co stars, after filming begins or after some time passes, no one says anything. I don't like it, so I post frequently, but no one ever responds…

Sakai: I often have trouble speaking up because I'm too considerate of my seniors.

Yano: Sakai doesn't really say anything. Rather, he doesn't return private LINE messages.

Sakai: That's not true. I reply as soon as I see them!

Yano: You didn't reply the other day.

Sakai: I might've been working.

Yano: Let's just leave it at that (laughs).

"Since you play brothers in this work, we'd like to ask what kind of household chores you'd share if the two of you were to live together."

Sakai: Leave the toilet and bathtub cleaning to me!

Yano: Are you good at it?

Sakai: I'm the type of person who makes things beautiful when my "switch" is turned on. However, folding clothes and vacuuming…I don't feel like doing that.

Yano: Well then, guess I'll do it.

Sakai: Please also take care of the cooking!

Yano: How strange! (laughs). Because, Sakai, you have a rice cooker at your house, and yet you eat precooked rice packs, right?

Sakai: Cooking rice is a pain…

Yano: I really don't understand that feeling.

Sakai: Everything depends on my mood (laughs). If I feel like cooking rice, I'll cook it.

Yano: So, on days when Sakai feels like it and cooks rice for me, I'll have to say "Thank you~!" out of consideration. How annoying~ (laughs).

"(laughs). In the future, if you were to work together again as actors, what kind of production would you like to work on?"

Sakai: I'd like to play a yakuza role.

Yano: I see. Your role would be something like, "Even though his face is cute, his face is calm when he kills," does that sound good?

Sakai: That's good!

Yano: Well then, I'll play the role of the detective who hunts him down. There was a drama like that, right? It was…"Informa," featuring Morita Go-san and Kiritani Kenta-san!

Sakai: Ah!

Yano: Sakai would be in Kiritani-san's position in that drama. Or, I'll be in Kiritani-san's position and Sakai will be in Yokohama Ryusei-san's position.

Sakai: That's really good!

Yano: Personally, I'm looking forward to it. What kind of work will Sakai first appear in after he graduates from King-Ohger? I think it's really important to make that first step. What kind of production do you want to be in?

Sakai: I have almost no experience in acting, so I'd like to play any kind of role.

Yano: Then, if you had to choose between comedy, romance, or serious, which one would you prefer?

Sakai: Are they genres I can do? In that case, I'll do it.

Yano: No, don't just say "I'll do it." I just gave you choices.

Sakai: I see, my bad (laughs). If I had to pick, I'd like to do a serious one. Also, comedy.

Yano: You chose two (laughs). And they're completely opposite genres.

Sakai: I'm greedy (laughs).

#handsome 😳 #they really love messing around #ohsama sentai kingohger #kingohger #super sentai #gira husty #racules husty #racles husty #masato yano #yano masato #taisei sakai #sakai taisei #toku cast #tokusatsu #kingohger cast #my scans #my translation #tv guide dan #king ohger #ohsama sentai king ohger #on the first page #pretty sure brother food means brotherhood #their loanwords are similar so maybe a mistake #also rice cookers are great please use them

[nesonkin]

My perspective on shipping characters that are canonically aroace (romance and/or/xor sex repulsive) as someone who identifies as aroace is simple. It's totally OK, but it's glaringly obvious when you do it without any regard to a character's orientation.

Because to me, it's just infinitely more interesting to explore one's struggles and desires when it comes to relationships with respect to their position on the aroace spectrum, than if I were to read yet another story where someone is magically okay being in a relationship with that one person.

To me aspec characters are primed for some interesting introspection on what a relationship is, what attraction is, what it means to love someone (all the different kinds of love) and how you choose to express it because those are the things that aro/ace people often have to think about in this amatonormative world we live in. For clarity's sake, I do not mean to suggest that non-aspec stories can't have those questions and themes too. Just that in my experience, I could not live a day without having to debate these topics with allos.

And that's not even going into non-partnering and loveless aces that are just as important part of the community as those that may seek companionship.

I hope all of this makes sense because I totally understand if this may come off wrong somehow. In short, if you're aspec, then you probably already get it, and you're off the hook. But if you're not my advice would be to pay attention to aspec experiences and learn to incorporate that into your stories, headcanons, or whatever. It always helps to learn something new.

#aromantic #asexual #aroace #aspec #shipping #this post was sponsored by the Alastor shipping discource #in which both sides have good points but I can't completely agree with one or the other #amatonormativity #i really debated posting this

[ktempestbradford]

Ancient Egypt and Ostrich Feathers

Have a question for the Egyptologists and knowledgeable fans of Ancient Egypt about ostrich feathers.

(btw is there an Egyptologist Tumblr community? I follow @thatlittleegyptologist but don't know of any other accounts. HMU!)

When I was in Egypt last month I went to the Grand Egyptian Museum to take the very limited tour of the atrium they offer now. It... wasn't worth the money. Anywho, our tour guide did his best to make it seem valuable by talking a LOT about each thing he showed us.

Next to the colossal statue of Ramses II that dominates the atrium there's a table showing the emblems of royal iconography. The sun disk, the nemes headdress, cow horns, and a feather. He asks us if we know what that last one is and I or someone says it's the feather of Ma'at. Correct! Do we know what bird it comes from? The ostrich, someone else says. Why did they choose ostrich feathers for Ma'at and also certain crowns?

On this trip I had gone to the Nubian museum and thus had just seen several pieces of art from pre-historical peoples that utilized ostrich eggs, including a famous one that had three pyramids etched into it along with some animals. So I said something like: The ostrich has been an important animal even before the pharaohs. They relied on it for food and made art with the eggs. The tour guide (Mark) said: That's an awfully materialistic view. No, that's not why.

Now... I know I'm not an expert even though I know a lot about ancient Egypt. But "a materialistic view"? Like somehow it's not enough that ostriches provided food and probably were used in other, important ways? Why do you think Hathor is represented as a cow and there are cow horns incorporated in crowns? Because they look cool? wtf?

Mark then goes on to tell this story. Back in the dawn of civilization in Egypt the Egyptian man didn't have much to do during the day. (eyebrow raise) So he started collecting feathers from all the birds that flew above him in the sky. (...um... wait...) He would collect and then count the barbules and do you know what he discovered? Only the ostrich had the same number of them on both sides. That's why this is the feather of balance and justice.

Friends. I have never wanted to scream SHENANIGANS or at least CITE YOUR SOURCES so much in my life. Like... what?

Leaving aside the implication that ostriches were somehow flying above ancient Egyptians or that there was some point where men didn't have a dang thing to do all day but count the little hairs on feathers, I feel like this explanation is complete hooey. I mean, it could be that all or some of an ostrich's feathers have the same amount of barbules on either side of the middle bit. You might even be able to convince me that this isn't true for any other bird that someone from the Nile valley 6,000+ years ago had access to. But I'm going to need a ton of supporting evidence that this is the sole reason why the feather of Ma'at is an ostrich feather and not for the "materialistic" reasons I cited.

Also, I'm sorry, but I'm real sure predynastic Nile valley dwellers were far more concerned about food and shelter than coming up with complex reasons for using a certain kind of feather to represent a metaphysical thing.

However, I could be wrong! So I'm asking: is there evidence for Mark's version of events? Is this, you know, written somewhere in a papyrus or on a temple wall or another place? I would honestly love to read any papers on this subject, whatever the background on it.

As to the Grand Egyptian Museum, I really hope that whoever they hire to give tours when the whole thing opens are better at this than Mark. I wasn't impressed with his tour overall and eventually gave up listening to him once I saw that there was a gelato place open for business inside.

#Egyptology #Egyptologists #Calling for Egyptologists! #Egypt #Ancient Egypt #I need to know if Mark is right #okay kay what I really want to know is that mark is wrong

[utilitycaster]

hi! I'm sorry if you answered this already and I missed the post, but what are your general thoughts on the party being split for so long?

Short answer: I think it's great. I think the best way to answer this accurately is to cover some of my past complaints about the campaign, and discuss how this split is addressing the vast majority of them. This is also, I suppose, serves as an argument for why it's worth getting caught up with Campaign 3 for anyone who fell off of regular watching.

I'll begin by saying that I understand the desire to have something akin to Campaign 2 but in Marquet: a group of people deeply tied into the lore and fabric of the setting and yet displaced within it, finding each other. I still would have liked to see that story. I do not fault people for being disappointed in not getting that, particularly given what Marquet means as a setting, and this still is not that campaign. But pretty much all of my other complaints have been addressed by the apogee solstice and the party split and so I'm not here to mourn what I know didn't happen, and instead to talk about how the last ten or so episodes have been banger after banger.

I said this elsewhere recently but my issue wasn't that the campaign was building up to the apogee solstice setpiece; it was that it took about 30 episodes to even reveal that was what the buildup was for, and yet, somehow, 35 episodes to finally be done with Treshi. Which meant in turn that the party was constantly kind of shepherded from place to place. Even the sidequests were mostly part of the buildup - Heartmoor Hamlet is a good time, and achieves quite a lot in only a handful of episodes - but it is, ultimately, mostly there to wipe out Ashton's debt which would be a detriment to getting to the main plot. The modular, party-driven nature of Campaign 2 just wasn't an option, since they could have quite possibly avoided the solstice (akin to how Campaign 2 completely avoided the Augen Trust plot and required a drastic reworking of the Lucien plot). But because it started so early, it was hard to get a sense of what would actually motivate the characters so that they could be guided more naturally by hooks they'd be likely to take, since they were doing fetch quest after fetch quest with a wealthy patron (I love Eshteross with all my heart but that kind of figure early in the story is tough to incorporate; more on that later) and getting lore dumped at by NPCs and never really had to scramble or take weird jobs killing rats in the sewers or even share rooms in an inn with people they didn't already know before the story started.

Which is the second part: the party did not really mix that much. Imogen and Laudna came in codependently joined at the hip, and Orym and Fearne were also quite close. Ashton and FCG had a looser arrangement, and Chetney was the only true free agent. So a lot of the time, the party felt like three groups working together with tenuous bridges rather than a coherent party, and they never quite had either the downtime to cohere, or the massive crisis to force them together. This party has actually seen quite a lot of death, but Bertand's happened too early, and while Laudna's didn't quite reset to the status quo, it also occurred just as the Treshi plot had ended and so the timeline was becoming even more accelerated. The seeds of something were there, but they needed something more to actually take root.

Enter the apogee solstice and the party split. This has fixed basically everything:

The fact that the solstice happened means that now we're in damage control mode. There's a clear motivator for the party, but one that they genuinely care about rather than one that requires the DM being like "and THIS NPC wants THIS thing."

It also forces the party to develop those relationships outside of the friend they started with. The obvious first reason is that the groups are split up along those lines. That is not an accident or a cruel joke; that's fucking necessary, frankly, to get the party to bond. As my meta about Laudna and Orym points out, not having their emotional support prior colleague - even by sending - and frankly, yeah, not even knowing they're alive, for certain, is what will make these characters actually grow and change. As we saw, the same is true for Fearne, Imogen, and FCG.

It notably removes the spotlight from Imogen, which is good, because the cool development happens after the character-focused arc, when they can process, rather than during. She's still Ruidusborn, but what that means is very different from what it meant pre-ritual.

Then there's the practical element of travel. This party probably isn't going to be teleporting nonstop, but they did have comparatively fast travel in the form of a skyship from very early on, and in another three levels Fearne will have transport via plants, and Imogen can take teleport as a cast spell the level after that, and then we'll never get to see much of the world...but if you break teleporting a bit? You send them into the middle of the wilderness? Yeah, they're going to need to have those watch conversations that were far too few and far between early in the campaign.

And allies! This party's doing it backwards. They've lost Eshteross; Keyleth's fate is unknown to them; Ryn is a statue; Beau and Caleb's fates are similar question marks. After so much time of having patrons and friendly wizards telling them what to do? They're alone, and they have to survive by their wits and by leaning on each other.

The fact that we've got guests is good both because we get to see different facets of the main cast's characters through their responses to these new companions, and because we're getting to fill some of the gaps in the party (people with more longstanding relationships to deities; people with 20 INT scores). It also pushes Bells Hells, in some way, closer together, by having to assert that they are part of a group with shared experience. And it's just a delight to have them.

This is also just fun for fans in that we're getting to see some of the most wished for locations - the Mighty Nein's time in Uthodurn was brief and very focused, and everyone's been clamoring for Molaesmyr and Issylra. For all that Vox Machina and the Mighty Nein fought world-wide threats, they were largely contained to a specific region, and I think this is really setting the stage for how big a deal the apogee solstice really is, by flinging the party across the world and showing how everyone is affected.

Anyway: love the party split. I honestly would have been happy with one or two more episodes of the other party and am looking forward to a similar length arc for this party, and honestly, even then, it might take a few episodes for them to reunite, and I think they'll all be better for it.

#answered #muthserra #critical role #critical role spoilers #two other thoughts that are personal/hunches and don't fit above #first is that my guess is still that this is the last full-length campaign so pulling out all the stops for locations & guests is smart #(i would love to be proven wrong but. suspect i am right) #and second is that my favorite ships are in the same groups for the most part so i'm vibing

[viridianevergarden]

I dont know why but I feel like if we get azriel and gwyn, it would be just another acosf. like I love the warrior girls but can we just get something different?? 😭

I’m with you. It would be another ACOSF and yet no longer than Frost and Starlight tbh.

All that would need to be done is for Azriel to magically get over Elain who he is obviously more down bad and whipped for than Mor herself.

And then proceed to get closer to Gwyn and get feelings for her?

And if we really want to give people grace and even attempt to give that type of book some length and substance then we could somehow incorporate Gwyn as a savior of Illyria with Az? Somehow do something regarding Koschei and the prison? (Even though she isn’t Made and quite literally wouldn’t be able to do shit to help).

It is the absolute weirdest and the most diabolical, worst writing I could ever imagine with the way the current story is set up.

My thought is this:

People have a near criminal obsession with enemies to lovers and strong badass “I will cut you down with my sword” type of fictional women.

They think that because this has been SJM’s forte since the start of her writing career, that she’ll continue to recycle it Every. Single. Time. Same with mates always being endgame. And that’s wrong.

By all means, enemies to lovers and strong fictional women is my bread and butter but…

Elriel’s current relationship and potential that’s been built through the course of 4 books has been fabulous.

They are such a unique and completely different turn for SJM.

We need something new. Something that SJM hasn’t really experimented with.

And that’s elriel.

Almost every ship that SJM has written involves strong women + enemies to lovers in one.

Give us friends to lovers, give us that forbidden love trope, give us that miscommunication trope, give us that soft and traditionally feminine woman who is strong in her own femininity and ability to love softly and quietly. Give us a couple who defies all odds, the gods, and Fate itself just to be with one another.

#acotar #pro elriel #elriel #pro elain #anon ask

[nalyra-dreaming]

Nalyra,I would like to know if you have ''advices'' for us non book fans?

Is there things we have to keep in mind before entering the 2nd season? The writers are obviously following the books with some adaptions and there is a good probability of chances that some of the show only won't understand some directions.

I just want to be ready and open to what would happen.

Thank you.

Hey!

So... it's good to remember that while they're following the second half of the book, they are also incorporating things from other books as well. Rolin is taking from TVL, QotD, TVA and at least Prince Lestat as well. I would also say he is taking from Merrick (the adaptions you mentioned).

That means that, base-story-line-level we are following the second half of the book. BUT - and here it gets (a bit more) difficult ^^- the "Devil's Minion's" parts in both past and Dubai will be interwoven, as well as more things from the "Prince Lestat" era in modern Dubai.

For non-book fans... a lot of these references will fly over your heads. That's not necessarily a bad thing!

But... if you want to know the big whoppers that will happen? (I'm putting this under the cut, so SPOILERS AHEAD!)

Armand and Daniel bitching at each other is part of their relationship, as will likely be explained in episode 5 and (likely?) 8

Claudia and Madeleine will die, tried ostensibly for Claudia's murder attempt against Lestat and Louis making Madeleine, but actually they are simply in the way of Armand: "I could not prevent it" (yes, he could)

Louis will stay with Armand though he knows he killed her

Armand (book canonically) influences and mind-controls Louis

Claudia's diaries contain a very heavy twist, which will likely be put into the trial scene

if it's not clear by now, not all we saw in s1 was the truth (and s2 won't be either in parts at the very least), and we know they will revisit episode 5. Whatever they will do there, that will be heavy.

Armand (book canonically) chops Claudia's head off to sew it onto a grown vampire's body, and when the result is grotesque, he puts her into the sun

Louis tries to commit suicide in Merrick, I believe that will happen at the end of s2

That event will somehow be mirrored with something happen to Daniel, imho

S3 is "The Vampire Lestat" so we have to get there somehow, meaning Lestat will show up somehow

These are the main things.

There are... a lot more details, obviously. I have speculated a lot :)

This season will leave the "family" setting behind, and fully dip into the world of the VC vampires, and the old covens are not cute. Them taking from the other books opens for a LOT of possibilities.

But these... are the main events that I think will happen.

Please feel free to ask if you want more details or have further questions!

So soon now!

#Anonymous #ask nalyra #iwtv s2 #iwtv #amc iwtv #interview with the vampire #interview with the vampire s2 #amc interview with the vampire #interview with the vampire amc #iwtv amc #the vampire chronicles #vc #vampire chronicles #future season speculation

[humaudrey]

Things my Rewrite Will Fix About Descendants - Kingdom Names

I'VE DONE IT!!

Anyway, one thing (there are multiple though, let's be honest) that particularly irked me about the Descendants franchise would be the names of the kingdoms. While "Auradon" has a nice ring to it, some of the names of the other smaller kingdoms/locations leave something to be desired.

So for my rewrite series, Barriers (and for my second rewrite WIP that has yet to be named), I decided to rename the ones I didn't like.

Charmington -> Edenwald, Snow White and Florian's Kingdom

First of all, if any of the kingdoms were going to be named "Charmington", why wouldn't it be the kingdom from Cinderella? Originally, I wanted to swap Charmington for Cinderellasburg, so naturally, the old Charmington would need a new name. I wanted the name of the kingdom to reference the Enchanted Forest in Snow White, so Eden was the first name to come to mind (meaning paradise, but also referencing the Garden of Eden in the story of Adam and Eve from the Bible, which also parallels well to Snow White being the first Disney Princess). But "Eden" felt somewhat incomplete. Eventually, adding the "wald" (meaning forest in German, which is where the story of Snow White originates) at the end gave it a much more fitting name imo.

Cinderellasburg -> Charmont, Kit/Charles/Henry/Christopher and Cinderella's Kingdom

Don't get me wrong, I love Cinderella (somehow even more now than I did before), but why would they name a region after some commoner? Yes, her story's inspiring, but not inspiring enough to rename a kingdom in her honor. Having the kingdom named "Charmington", where the Charmings rule felt fitting at first. But, the more I looked at "Charmington", the more "Charmington" felt like a clothing store or a medieval amusement park. I wanted to incorporate "Charm" as a prefix , and took the suffix from "argent" (meaning silver in French, which is the color of Cinderella's dress) and changed the e to an o.

Auroria -> Aetheria, Aurora and Phillip's Kingdom

I almost left "Auroria" alone because it sounds so pretty and ethereal and whimsical. I could believe that either Aurora was named after "Auroria" or "Auroria" was named after Aurora and I was willing to let that be that. All I did was add ia to aether, and that sounded prettier to me lmao.

Auradon -> Beaumier, Adam and Belle's Kingdom

This one is specifically for my second rewrite. In this fic verse, all of the united kingdoms are still called "The United Kingdoms of Auradon". However, Adam and Belle are not the monarchs ruling over all the other kingdoms, therefore their specific kingdom needs a name. I wanted the name to be French inspired, and the name "Beau" felt fitting given it means "beautiful" or "handsome" like "Belle". "Beau" is also a nice little callback to the writer of the original fairytale in 1756, Jeanne-Marie Leprince de Beaumont AND to one of the villages the setting is based on, Ribeauvillé. All I did after that was research names of places that had "Beau" in the name, and I came across Beaumier Hotels.

And nothing for Seaside, because A.) All of the other names I came up with sound too corny (and I don't like Tirulia) and B.) Seaside's growing on me.

#disney descendants #descendants rewrite #my fic series: barriers #auradon #cinderellasburg #charmington #auroria #for future reference #things my rewrite will fix about descendants

[emmies-agere]

Can you do a cg!hero hc with a regressor that uses alot of gear?? I love ur writing!!

—🎀

hi 🎀 anon! of course :) i tried to just write general caregiver hero headcanons while also incorporating the gear prompt, so i hope that was okay. i hope you like it— have a nice day! <3

caregiver hero headcanons! (with a regressor that uses a lot of gear)

•hero is a very patient and kind caregiver! he’s always looking out for you and his voice softens when he speaks to you, in a way that it does for no one else

•he’ll do a bunch of cheesy things, like waking you up from a nap with a stuffie attack, or arranging your meals to look silly (making a smiley face with blueberries, using cut in half sandwiches for cat ears, cooking pancakes into hearts, etc.)

•speaking of which— you would never go hungry around hero! he makes three meals a day and probably knows every snack recipe ever... somehow...

•he loves using pet names for you!! his favorite are honey, sweetheart and baby.

•hero wouldn’t mind that you used a lot of gear! he’s happy that you have things that help you and make you feel more comfortable in your regression.

•it makes it easier for him to bring spare items of things! like if you slipped away from home or something. he has a bag of little gear in a nonchalant pocket of his car, so if you ever needed a paci, plushie, or toy— you’ve got it!

•would absolutely help you shop for any little gear. unfortunately, he doesn’t trust you with online shopping when you’re regressed, so he always makes sure he’s there to supervise haha!

•he’ll tell you which items he thinks look nice and help you with keywords that help you find exactly what you’re looking for!

•hero would do any activity you wanted when regressed! you wanted to play tag? you two are running in the backyard! you want to bake cookies? he’s got an apron on before you can even get to the kitchen. you want to do his makeup/play dress up? doll him up, kiddo! he’s got no shame about it and he loves spending time with you <3

•sometimes, he’ll come home from a grocery trip with a few little items for you. he knows how much they mean to you and he’s sure to pick out color schemes, textures, and items you really like!

•i think he would be a very comforting caregiver. if you tripped and scraped your knee, he’d calmly clean it up and stick a band-aid on you. if you ever ended up regressing from stress or discomfort, he would ask if he could hold you before wrapping his arms around you if you said yes, hushing you gently and rubbing your back.

•on the same topic, i think he’d be pretty physically affectionate! he understands if you don’t want him to touch you or if you’re sometimes just not up for it, but if you are, then trust that he’ll be kissing your cheek, holding your hand and never turning down cuddles <3

•definitely reads you bedtime stories. he’ll sit at the edge of your bed/curl up beside you and read you a story. he’s particularly fond of goodnight moon and the very hungry caterpillar!

•he’d gently remind you about things, like to not put your fingers in your mouth and instead ask him for a paci, or when you should maybe stop eating sugar so you don’t get a stomach-ache

•overall, hero is a very sweet caregiver. he only wants the best for you and will always be there if you need anything. he loves you very much <3

#age regression #age regressor #agere #agere blog #fandom agere #sfw agere #sfw #safe agere #sfw interaction only #age dreaming #omori #omori age regression #omori agere #hero omori #agere imagine #agere headcanons #agere writing #omori headcanons #omori hero

[drawnfamiliarfaces]

Say what does HoM means and will there be other heroes joing the AU?

Heroes of Millennium AU aka HoM AU aka AU about my HoMies ! lol i probably should tag it with a full name before abbreviating it everywhere xD

Hm, that depends:

Like am I planning there to be more than 9 for the 'main' cast? No. I would probably go crazier if I had to figure out how to fit everyone/thing together lol (I'm already struggling because in addition to 9, each of them have like 3-4 supporting characters + antagonists and im still floundering with figuring out plot details xD).

If you are asking if there are other shows/protagonists that would make appearances in this AU, than Yes! There are a couple of other 'heroes' that would appear in some story parts/stories, in various capacities. I have several levels of involvments for them (from 'vital to AU's ecosystem' to 'cameos just for fun' kinda stuff).

Though I have to say right away, im aiming to involve shows more from the same era, so its less likely the 'newer' shows (most shows from 2013 & up) would appear in any important way (so, like Star vs Forces of Evil and Steven Universe would be more of a small AU cameos than actual full-fledged crossover). And some of the shows from the same era are too hard to incorporate in the AU because they are already too self-sufficient, so e.g. DC universe shows (Static Shock, Teen Titans, Justice League & etc) and the like, won't be appearing in the main AU.

Im not that good at making AU,s so I could never somehow mash all of those together and not go insane xD so im trying to aim my ambitions low.

But hey I have great hope to at least pull off some of my ideas. ;D

#que? #hom au #heroes of millennium au #hom au Q&A

[spikeface]

the terror you long to look at

Written for @teenwolf-meta’s Meta May Monday theme: Ties. 

Despite my frustration with the show’s handling of the anuk-ite’s mythology, I really liked the idea that, in the finale, it lures people into looking at it by becoming someone they long to see--but, at the same time, because the anuk-ite is a fear monster, someone they’re terrified of. I was frustrated, however, by the fact that the shape it took was either never explicit, or depended on who was doing a cameo for the finale. Here would be my picks for what the anuk-ite would look like, for the people who had to face it, if casting and time weren’t an issue:

Peter Hale would see Laura Hale. I didn’t dislike that the monster took the form of Malia, for Peter. She’s definitely someone he longs to see, and I’d interpret the fear aspect as either shame for when he’d hurt her or her loved ones, or simply fear of the fact that she sees through him. I think it would have meant a lot, however, if they’d shown explicitly that he misses Laura, and is afraid to face the fact that he murdered her even as he longs to see her. His murder of her starts the entire story, and it would have been an interesting way to incorporate it into the show’s finale.

Malia Tate would see Kylie Tate. We don’t actually know what form the anuk-ite took for her, which makes me mad, because it would have been such a good time to explore her grief for Kylie. One of the first things we learn about Malia is that she’s haunted by her sister’s death most of all, and is still, in some way, looking out for her. No matter how much time passes, she’s always going to.

Jackson Whittemore would see Matt Daehler. This one’s a little shaky because s2 ends with Jackson very clearly growing out of the headspace that made him a kanima, and literally growing away from it. But 1) they made him part-kanima again in the finale so I’ve decided that means he’s still got Baggage and 2) even if he moved on from being the kanima in general, Jackson never got to confront Matt specifically. Matt--this guy he had this intense and toxic relationship with, who represented everything the deepest part of him wanted--just disappeared from his life, only to be found dead in water Jackson could have saved him from. I think Jackson is terrified of somehow running into Matt again. I think he’s even more terrified of the idea that, on some level, he’d be happy to see him.

Ethan would see Aiden. How could he not? Of course he longs to see his brother, his literal other half and the one who felt what he felt all his life, whose life Ethan felt in turn. At the same time, we see in both 3a and 3b that Aiden’s passion for violence disquiets Ethan, even though he knows he’s protected by it, and in Motel California, Aiden also represents everything Ethan most fears, what he’d kill himself to escape. 

Derek Hale would see Paige Krasikeva. I loved that we got a cameo from Haley Webb, but I maintain that Jennifer was the weakest choice for Derek. It’s not that I don’t think memories of her haunt him, but Derek already confronted Jennifer—multiple times, and in ways that literally had to do with “seeing” her. I definitely don’t think he longs to see her the way he’d long to see Paige, the girl he was manipulated into forcing the bite on—a mistake we know still haunts him. He was rattled to lose even the blue eyes that represent his guilt about her death. I think that even now, his longing to see her would frighten him, since his desire for her once led to her death.

Scott McCall would see his own murdered body. Ok, stay with me on this one! I loved that they did a cameo with the nogitsune wearing Stiles’ body, and I think that ranks near the top of Scott’s fears, but I don’t think he’d be tempted to look at him. Conversely, I think he’d long to look at Allison, but I don’t think that desire would terrify him.

I think the desire that most terrifies Scott is the one for his own death. Scott has struggled with suicidal urges since at least 3a, and Tyler Posey has discussed how, by the time Scott’s murdered in s5, he was “ready to die.” Scott’s death is the end of the relentless struggle his life has been since he was bitten, freedom from all of his perceived failures that haunt him--like the nogitsune taking Stiles’ body, like Allison’s death. It would be so fitting for him to confront that in the library, where he was originally murdered--where his murdered body once lay on the ground, the one part of himself he’ll never be able to see. Unless he looks now. 

It would also fit really well with @daughterofluthien’s excellent meta about the meaning of Scott’s self-blinding in the finale. If the anuk-ite represents Scott’s desire to die, then the mutilation represents, ironically, his rejection of that desire, and would foreshadow his similar rejection of the lure of death in the movie, when he growls at the nogitsune: “I’m not ready to die.”

#teen wolf #peter hale #malia tate #jackson whittemore #derek hale #scott mccall #teen wolf meta #twmeta #twmetamay

[theconstantsidekick]

Captain America: Civil War ft. Static (6) | s.r

Pairings: Steve Rogers x Stark!Reader, Tony Stark x Stark!Reader (siblings), Bucky Barnes x Stark!Reader (future)

Genre: Angsty city babyy!

Summary: Steve and Y/n try to hash out their different stances on the Accord, in a small car, with Sam and Bucky right there in the backseat. It goes as well as you would expect.

(These scenes incorporate y/n, codename—Static, into the pre-existing story as a character without making drastic changes to the plot or mythos. All the major plot points from the MCU remain in place with the addition of the reader as Static, who is not only a Stark but also enhanced. Whatever events from the canon aren’t mentioned, take place without much change.)

Warnings: Swearing, Mentions of Past Trauma, Mentions of Traumatic Political Events (Bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki, The Chernobyl Disaster), Mentions of Gory Deaths, Mentions of Violence Against Animals.

a/n: this was gonna be a lighthearted chapter to act as an interlude from all the angst... that is not what it ended up becoming. If anyone wants to correct me on something, hit me up. If I have said something cruel or hurtful, let's talk it out. I assure you that was never my intension.

Captain America: Civil War ft. Static (5) | Captain America: Civil War ft. Static (7) | Series Masterlist | Age of Ultron (Static Origin Story) | The Avengers (ft. Static) | Captain America: The Winter Soldier (ft. Static) | Static Verse Masterlist

“You can ask,” she says calmly.

The sound of the old yet sturdy Volkswagen hums calmly in the background. It’s not harmonious or anything but it does provide a sense of comfort, he thinks.

And you best believe he does need a whole lotta comforting right about now. 

“Ask what?” Steve asks, playing dumb and failing at it.

“Whatever it is that you want to,” she answers simply. She’s looking out the window of the passenger seat. Steve can’t see her face to be able to read it… Well, that’s not completely fair. Even if he could see her face, he’s almost certain he wouldn’t be able to read it. 

Ever since Ultron, ever since she opened up about her past, he’s noticed her change. She’s different now… or maybe, he thinks, maybe she’s more herself than she has ever been before. This isn’t to say Steve was great at reading her before but she seemed easier to grasp, closer in a way. That’s not all, though. He always knew she was a competent fighter, but now he’s entranced by her every move. It’s a dance. He used to be awed by her skill before, the motions were quick and effective but now? Now watching her fight, he can see the fluidity and ease. No one on the team has that. No one Steve has ever fought has that. There is a sense of comfort in the way she handles herself in battle. The movements are precise and practiced, like she’s done it countless times before… she probably has. 

All this sucks for Steve because ever since Tony suggested the accords be signed, every single conversation with her feels like a battle. And he’s not ashamed to admit it, the woman he loves is a better fighter than him. 

“I don’t know what you’re—”

“Just ask what you wanna ask, Steven,” she cuts him off swiftly.

See? 

Better than he’s gonna get any time soon.

Sighing he asks, “Why are you here? With us I mean? I thought you didn’t agree with us.”

“Common man! Don’t drag us into this!” Sam protests from the back seat. “We’re very happy to have you here,” he adds politely while looking at Y/n. “The Frosty Fighter agrees, doesn’t he?” He looks over to Bucky next to him, urging him to agree. When there is no response, Sam elbows him in the chest.

“Ouch!” Bucky exclaims. “What?”

“We’re glad Y/n is with us, aren’t we?” Sam prompts.

In the rearview mirror, Steve can see Bucky sit up awkwardly, every move a sign of his discomfort over the situation.

But Sam’s insistence is inescapable, so softly he replies. “Yes.”

And somehow that makes Y/n chuckle.

Huh, he thinks.

“Fine,” Steve concedes. “Why are you here? With me?” He asks again.

“Because you can’t handle Sergeant Barnes alone,” she replies.

Uhh, what?

“I was able to contain him back at the headquarters.” Steve might not have had as many hours on the field as her but he’s not incapable of taking care of his friend!

She, to his surprise, chuckles again. “It wasn’t a comment on your capabilities, handsome… You just have a habit of letting your emotions take charge when it comes to the Frosty Fighter.”

“And you don’t?” Steve challenges abrasively.

She finally takes her eyes off the passing scenery outside the window to look at him with what he, with his poor reading skills, determines to be controlled rage. His challenge is met with a daunting stare. 

“I do too,” she answers. “That’s why you’re here.” She looks away again.

Okay, maybe he needs to reassess his approach. He adjusts uncomfortably in the driver’s seat, bracing himself to come at the situation from a different angle; a more tactical one.

Before he can though—

“But you don’t think Tony’s right either?” Sam asks. 

“Nope,” she replies.

Bucky beats Steve to the punch, asking, “Then who is?”

“Me.”

“We should all just give up?” Steve questions, incredulous. “Stand by and watch while people need our help? When we can do good?”

“No…I suggest you look away, Steven. Take a vacation maybe, somewhere warm—considering your history and all,” her replies are so painfully nonchalant, it puts Steve on edge.

“Damn it Y/n, I’m being serious!” He explodes.

“So am I.” Her seeming lack of interest in the conversation irks him unfathomably. “Didn’t you hear what Vision said?”

“You believe we’re the reason behind all this?” Steve’s beyond incredulous at this point.

“I believe in escalation,” she counters. “If there is someone out there who wants revenge, who wants to stop us—like this psycho fake doctor we’re currently dealing with—they can’t just use the usual methods.” She turns to him then, “You have to understand putting down any of us isn’t easy. If someone wants to stop you, it’s not gonna be as easy as a knife to your gut. You’re a superhuman, my guy. Tony is packing a fucking arsenal on his chest. And Wanda??? Do you even know the extent of what she can do with her powers?”

“No, but—”

She cuts him off, “Neither do I, but from what little I understand, she’s as close to unstoppable as it gets. Same for Vision. And that’s to say nothing of Hulk or Thor! I mean he’s a God, can he even DIE??” She sounds almost as if she’s about to explode.

But at some level, he does understand where she’s coming from. The Avengers are dangerous… but only to their enemies.

Exhaling loudly, he tries to gather his patience to respond with some sense of consideration. “So what? We just give up because someone out there is waiting to be instigated? Have you thought that maybe that is inevitable? If there are people like us, itching to become heroes, the inverse must be true as well. There have to be people out there ready to exploit the system through whatever means necessary. Correlation does not equal causation. Not always.” He looks at her then, “If we all take a collective vacation and stop helping people is there a guarantee that the violence dies down?”

“I am not saying we quit helping. I am not inclined to think in extremes like you or my brother,” she answers, her voice calm once again. “I just think we should pick and choose our battles.”

“That is all the more reason for us to oppose the Accords—”

She cuts him off again, “Yes, yes. That’s why I didn’t sign them!” Her head falls back, she closes her eyes and adds, “But when I say we pick and choose I mean threats that cannot be handled by humans… I mean that the Avengers should stop shoving their noses in political matters—human matters. If another giant hole opens up in the sky, I’ll come running, till then? Avengers are better off taking a vacation.” She looks out the window again. “Maybe Tahiti? I’ve heard it’s a magical place.”

“How is that fair? Why should people who are suffering because of their governments or insurgents, or terrorists be excluded? Why don’t they deserve our protection?” Steve challenges.

“You’re oversimplifying again,” she says calmly. “It’s not about them, it’s about us.”

“How?” Sam asks. Belatedly he realizes, for a minute there Steve completely forgot Sam and Bucky were in the car with them. 

“The Avengers, as a team, predominantly comprises of American citizens… And even the ones who aren’t Americans are led by a man who wears star-spangled tights and goes by the name Captain America. Do you seriously not see the issue in that?” She looks back at him.

“You think our actions reflect on our country?” He questions.

“You don’t?” She throws back. “You seriously don’t see how us, flying around different nations, doing whatever we want without giving a shit about their laws and their needs isn’t going to seem like an act of showcasing dominance by a nation that is a global superpower?” 

“I’m not blind to the implications, Y/n. I understand what it looks like at a cursory glance. But there’s a lot more to it. We are not just agents of our country; we surpassed that title a long time ago. We are so much more than that. Countless humanitarian missions, assisting during natural calamities, providing aid to refugees, all of that cannot simply be overlooked in favor of what it says on our passports. As a team, the Avengers are a symbol of hope,” Steve argues.

“You cannot be that naive, man. You wear the American flag like a costume, you don’t think the other countries might see your actions in their land as interference from a foreign nation? You think they care about the semantics? You think any common person would?” 

“I’ll ditch the uniform.”

“Sure, Captain America”

“I’ll ditch the name too.”

“Are you acting dense to piss me off, or did the Frosty Fighter get a good hit in there somewhere?”

He rolls his eyes. “I want to help people. I don’t need a title or a suit to do it. I just want the freedom to help the ones in need.”

“That sounds sweet and all, but it’s as ignorant as it gets.” 

“You’re confusing ambition with ignorance.”

“You think if you change your name, and pick a new outfit, it will stop? You think that’s all it’ll take? You’re a fucking weapon, Steve. We’re all weapons. That’s the cold hard cocksucking truth. People might see us as heroes but at the end of the day, they all know that is what the fuck we are. I am not saying that’s a bad thing… or a good thing either. I am just saying that when other nations see you, going around, breaking bones with a light punch, they will also want one of you, all for themselves. You’re Mattel’s best selling Barbie, Stevie boy; everyone wants one for themselves to dress up, play house with and command armies with. There will always be a dumb fucker out there trying to recreate whatever the fuck you are.”

“It’s not my fault you are the way you are, Y/n,” he bites back, just as fierce as her. “You’re an alien, you could’ve been set off sooner or later even if Hydra hadn’t gotten around to it.”

He can hear her jaw clench. “Yeah, maybe,” she says dismissively. It’s an act, a defense, he knows it. It’s gonna be followed by a punch in the gut, an offense. “But can you say the same thing about Frosty Fighter back there?”

The car screeches to a halt on the empty backroad they’d been sailing through. Steve can smell the burnt rubber on the road, but it’s hard to care about it right now.

Slamming the door upon exiting, Steve walks over to the sidewalk. Pacing a little, he waits for her to follow suit.

The moment she does, “You know Y/n, sometimes you say shit to be right, to win an argument without weighing the consequences of your words.” His words are fuming, just like him.

“Is that a threat?” She asks, almost jovially.

His steps halt with his back to her. “You’re crossing a line, Y/f/n.”

Despite all his claims of not being able to read her, in this moment, he knows exactly how she’s reacting despite not looking at her. While his eyes are set on the patch of sparse greens, he can almost feel her provocation leaving her body.

“You’re right,” she relents. “I’m sorry.” He knows she means it. “I went too far with the last two, I shouldn’t have,” she says calmly, so he turns to look at her. She kicks the ground, looking surprisingly similar to a kid caught with an orange tongue when explicitly told no more juice pops. “It’s frustrating. I never thought there would come a day where Tony would ask me to sign away my freedom.”

“I think,” he looks up at the sky, “I think he’s just trying to make amends somehow. It’s not the best way to go about it but he’s trying. I can’t blame him.”

“I can,” she counters. “He knows what it would mean for me. He’s still proposing it. I blame him completely.”

“And yet, you keep insisting you’re not on our—” 

She promptly cuts him off, “Before you start your shitty little spiel about how that is why I should stand with you, I’d like to let you know, you are only doubling my said frustration. It is beyond me how you cannot see how much damage the Avengers have caused—are capable of causing still!”

Hands on his hip, her frustration mirrored on his face, he says, “Why did you even join the team if you think so?”

“Because of Tony.”

“That’s all? That’s all it ever was? You never, not even for a second, believed in us? In what we do?” He’s desperate right now.

She shrugs. “I know we are capable of good, Steve. I am not saying we aren’t. But you cannot overlook the impact. The Superhero game is a hair’s breadth away from privatization and if that happens, we are all doomed.”

Exhaling loudly, his head falls.

The sun’s too bright, he thinks. 

“I don’t think heroes, real heroes can be bought off,” he counters. “If there even came a point where there could be heroes for hire, they wouldn’t be heroes, not really. They’d be—” he can’t think of a word.

“Soldiers?” 

Somehow, the challenge in her eyes is brighter still.

Before either of them can say anything to that, Sam gets out of the car and comes to stand in front of them. “Did you guys forget we’re wanted fugitives? Or having this couple’s tiff in broad daylight is just like a death wish I wasn’t told about?”

Couple’s tiff?

“This is not a couple’s tiff.” He runs a hand through his hair in frustration. “This is a discussion about Y/n’s fundamental lack of faith in us as heroes,” he accuses. 

“No,” she counters. “First of all,” she looks at Sam, “This is a blind spot, Steve might be naive but he’s not an idiot. And second of all,” turning to him she adds, “this is not a discussion, this is an intervention for Steve, the jerkface who supports capitalism.”

“What?!” Steve’ completely lost by this point.

With carefree steps, Y/n walks over to a boulder and sets herself atop it. Slowly then, she begins to stretch. “Do you know about the Nuclear-Proliferation Treaty?”

Completely confounded by the change of topic, all Steve can do right now is respond, “Yes. Signed on 1st July 1968, the treaty was negotiated to prevent the spread of nuclear weapons and weapons technology, to promote cooperation in the peaceful uses of nuclear energy.” 

She nods in acknowledgement. “Do you know why it was signed?”

“I just told you why.” It’s been a long, long day and it’s barely the afternoon. So yeah, Steve relaxes, leans back on the car. He lets his body fall loose. He isn’t entirely relaxed, not really. He’s just a little too tired to keep his guard up in front of his friends and his girlfriend, despite knowing for sure whatever comes next will be just as hurtful as any enemy attack . 

“No, you told me what the treaty’s function was supposed to be… or tried to be. I’m asking you why it was signed. Do you know why?”

“I’m guessing you’ll tell me.”

And that, out of all the things, makes her chuckle, “Fear.” Their eyes meet. “When The Manhattan Project started, it scared the shit out of every nation that was aware of its existence. Then on 6 and 9 August 1945, when the 509th Composite Group of the United States Army Air Forces dropped those newly minted bombs on Hiroshima and Nagasaki, respectively, everyone and their mothers collectively shat their pants. Which, I mean, can you really blame them?”

“What’s your point?” Sam chimes in.

She looks up at the sky. “The point, Samuel, is that any weapon that strong will instill so much fear in the hearts of men, that it will either result in an all-out relinquishment of the weapon or—”

“Everyone’s gonna want a weapon of their own,” Sam surmises.

Sam receives a wink and finger guns for his correct answer

Then she looks at Steve. “Those bombs were so fucking scary that the only defense these fucked in the head politicians could come up with was creating one of their own. Which obviously led to multiple countries testing and developing a nuclear arsenal of their personal collection. It got bad enough that they needed to come together and be like, ‘Yeah ok. We fucked up. These are way too many weapons and if they get in the wrong hands we’ll end up never needing a sequel for Planet of the Apes cause we’ll be living it.’” She sits up straighter. “We’re just like these weapons, Steve; that’s what I mean when I say we’re nuclear. We’re incomprehensibly powerful weapons and the accords are like a (not so) pre-emptive NPT.” Shaking her head she adds, “Now, I’m not trying to negate or diminish Japan’s war crimes from that period. I never will. It was a war. There were crimes. Not much logic to it than that. All’s I’m saying is that the justification for the use of such weapons, of us will always be shaky and terrifying.”

His jaw clenches.

He understands. He isn’t so naive that he cannot see where she’s going with all this but, if he doesn’t believe that people like Sam, Natasha, Tony—if people like them weren’t going to fight for they believed in, if they didn’t fight for people who can’t fight for themselves the world would be a much worse place for it. The Avengers are capable of a lot of bad but he knows they are capable of a lot more good. They haven’t been able to save everyone but they have always given their all, on every single mission. They have always been ready to lay down their lives for what they believed in, and that kind of faith cannot be bad. That kind of pure devotion cannot be evil.

He knows it.

“Just because you are not capable of seeing the potential we have to do good, doesn’t make us weapons. Just because you don’t believe in us, doesn’t mean we’ll forsake our promise to help people, Y/n.” He stands up straight. “We aren’t that easily swayed.”

She nods halfheartedly. “You know about Chernobyl?”

“Another history lesson?” Sam chides. 

She smiles again. “Something like that.” She looks at him, “Do you?”

He nods. “Yea, I read up on it.”

“I was there,” she says easily, as if she’s talking about some concert she attended back in the day.

“You were at Chernobyl?” Bucky’s question comes as a surprise to both Sam and him who were otherwise too focused on Y/n. However, she seems to have been expecting it almost. Walking over, Bucky comes to stand right opposite her, an arm’s length away from him.

She shrugs just as easily and says, “Howard, Peggy and I thought it would be wise. Someone with…my ‘set of skills’ was ideal to assess the damage, understand the situation, and help if necessary. It wasn’t a S.H.I.E.L.D. mission or anything, we were just worried. If it had been a mission, there would’ve been motives, and we didn’t want that to be the case for a situation that sensitive.” She pauses for a second. Despite the heavy subject matter, there is a hint of a smile on her face. She’s reminiscing, Steve realizes. It makes his stomach churn. “But yeah, I was there. I saw all of it. I saw the people that were affected, the children that were born, the first responders who were brought into the hospitals for radiation poisoning because the officials didn’t have the guts or common sense to admit to their fuck up.” Closing her eyes, she sighs. She is done reminiscing. “They were rotting away. Not slowly, not graciously; they were rotting away from the inside out in the most painful way imaginable. It was the most gruesome thing I had ever seen, and it wasn’t even an act of war. It was a mistake, an error, something that was overlooked due to lack of resources.”

The moment is too heavy for anyone except her to be able to break it.

“Did you read about the units sent out for clean ups, to minimize damage?” She asked.

“The units to clean up the spill—”

She shakes her head. “There were units sent out to the neighboring areas around Pripyat. These were soldiers who were ordered to exterminate any and all living accelerants.”

“Living accelerants?” Steve asks.

“Their job was to hunt down all the wildlife in the area. Whether it was farm animals, stray cats or pet dogs; they were all collected and… put down,” Bucky is the one who answers, surprising the group.

“Ten points to Frosty Fighter,” Y/n comments, still seeming a little astounded. “It was nowhere close to being the worst tragedy to come out of the incident, but it was the most unassuming one. They were in the blast radius and were suffering from radiation poisoning as well, but it’s not like they could do anything about it.” Sighing once again, she pauses for a second, before continuing, “The impact the Avengers tend to have is similarly severe, it too leads to completely unassuming tragedies.”

“I don’t think that’s fair,” Sam speaks up. “Chernobyl was built in secret, hidden away from the U.S. as well as their neighboring nations which is why their Government refused to ask for aid. If they had been open about it, countless lives could have been saved but they were too busy trying to save their own asses.” He crosses his arms and levels her with a look, “Whatever we do, we do it to save people. We do it to make things a little easier, more manageable. It’s not the same”

“No, it isn’t,” she admits. She seems… he doesn’t even have a word for it—worn down? That’s the closest Steve can get to describing her right now. “But the reactor blew up because of negligence… human error. The devastation was a result of hubris… we know a little something about that, don’t we?”

“We made one mistake,” Steve contends. “I am not trying to diminish it, but we slipped up once. And we rectified it immediately. Shouldn’t we at least be given a second chance?”

“Why?” She argues. “And honestly, that one mistake was more than enough. The repercussions of that one mistake will be felt for decades.” Exhaling audibly, she shakes her head. “Look, we live in a carefully crafted system. Human society as a whole is a result of ages and ages and ages of strife and discord and compromise. It’s a delicate structure, disrupting which doesn’t take a lot. The mistake we made… It sure was disruptive, seeing as multiple nations came together to impose the Accords onto us.”

He feels a distant desperation now, to prove to her that he’s right. “We cannot overlook the destruction we caused. We have to be held accountable for it, of course. But we have done a lot to protect this society as well; we fought off Loki and his aliens, we are still dismantling HYDRA but bringing their existence to the light wasn’t exactly a small task. We are capable of helping this system flourish,” he tries. “We just need another chance.”

“Despite our extraordinary powers, at our core, we are just human…ish. We are more than capable of repeating our same mistakes,” she says easily, calmly, almost as if she knows there is very little point to this debate. Why is she fighting me then?

“But we are also capable of learning from them,” he states with full faith. “This can be an opportunity for us to step back, reassess, and get better.”

And that somehow seems to be the last straw. 

“Listen to me, okay?” She’s instantly on her feet. Her tone has changed all of a sudden, to something more urgent, more earnest. “The system that we currently have isn’t the best… There are flaws in it, fundamental ones, but it works. It works well enough that we’re not inciting a nuclear war. It’s functional, not perfect but functional; and people had to fight for it to become what it is today. It took countless revolutions, inventions, wars, civil disobedience movements and about a million protests to get where we are right now… And people did that. They did it all by their lonesome, without any help from us. What I’m trying to say, what none of you seem to want to listen is that people will always, always keep fighting for what they believe in. They will succeed in making things better.” She’s vibrating with sheer confidence. “Utopia might not be achieved by next week, but people will keep at it till the day they do… Isn’t that enough?”

Now what you have to understand about Steve is that even though he is technically a hundred years old, he hasn’t lived for a hundred years. Everyone knows that but not a lot of people understand it. He hasn’t lived through every decade leading to this one. He was stuck on ice. When he went in, the world functioned a lot differently than when he came out. And that is where he and Y/n are complete opposites. 

While she is, for all intents and purposes, younger than him, she has lived a lot longer than him. It makes him feel a sense of disconnect to her… maybe he always will.

“It feels fairly insincere for us to have the power to help them speed up the process but choose instead to sit back and watch, don’t you think?”

“No! No, I don’t think so.”

Steve’s at the end of his rope. “Come on, Y/n! Do you have so little faith in us that you cannot even imagine that we might be able to make the world a better place? Do you believe in us at all?”

She chuckles then. It’s followed by a pause. Her hands are on her hips while she looks down at the ground. “You know about a week after the reactor blew up at Chernobyl, they realized that the nuclear material was melting through the concrete and was about to make contact with a pool of water underneath. The water was supposed to act as coolant but in this case would cause a fucking radiation-contaminated steam explosion upon contact. So what’s the plan, right? How to stop it? They needed people to dive into 20 million liters of poison water and turn a couple valves to drain it.” She looks at the three men then. “And before I could even think of breaking my cover to volunteer, three men—three normal, everyday men stepped up.” She’s smiling. She looks… proud? “Funny thing is, these were men who knew exactly what could happen to them. Of the danger this mission posed to them. Going in there was like inviting Death over for dinner and they did it without a single ounce of hesitance. They weren’t superhuman or of alien origin, trust me. I checked. They were just… people. Normal people who knew what needed to be done and decided to do it.” She clicks her tongue. “It’s not that I don’t believe in us, Steve. I do. I just believe a lot more in them.”

The words hang in the air. They stay there with nothing but the sound of the cars whizzing past them on the road.

Their silence is only broken when Steve's phone chimes.

Pulling it out of his pocket, he looks down at it. “It’s Sharon. She gave us a location, it’s 15 minutes from here.”

“We should head out,” Sam suggests.

“Yeah. Yeah, we should do that,” Y/n agrees, already getting back in the car. But before she can—

“You know, Steve’s just like them, right?” Bucky speaks up from where he stands behind her.

“What?” She asks, a little lost.

He meets her eye to eye. It’s the first time he’s had the courage to do so. “The scrawny little kid from Brooklyn—he’s just like the people you say you believe in so much.”

She nods. “He was… And most of his fundamentals still are… But power changes you. It changes where you stand. He has a good amount of it now,” she looks over at Steve, “unlike the kid from Brooklyn.” Her eyes fly back over to Bucky before she adds, “I believe in him more than he believes in himself, I just don’t think he understands the fact that his stance has to change with him.” Pointing back at Sam, “Now that one’s a whole different story. If he were the one opposing me, I would’ve lost by now.” With that she gets in the car.

Read the next part here. Find the series masterlist here. Find other Static Verse works here.

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[robininthelabyrinth]

prompt 1: I'd love to see a niecest fic (where it is truly mutually requited, no hypnosis mindbreaks required; I'm a terribly softhearted romantic & just want to see them happy~) that incorporates your characterizations of the saber spirits somehow? Like, Baxia and Aituan, idk, end up like... bonded somehow by their masters getting together and that... maybe helps balance the qi deviations or IDK I WANT THEM TO BE HAPPY *cough* ok. yes. something. prompt 2: ohhhh I know. Jiang Cheng gets some sort of temporary story-convenient amnesia and assumes that (probably still a small child)!Jin Ling is his son, Jin Ling maybe... doesn't correct him for a bit? ("Wait whose kid is this. Did I give birth to a kid somehow. I mean I guess that might as well have happened, sure.") prompt 3: turns out Wen Qing was also being kept secretly alive but imprisoned by the Jin sect all this time, and Jin Ling discovers her in the aftermath of canon. Chengqing y/y? ANYWAY please feel free to select any of these that may strike your fancy, do not feel obligated to pick more than one or any of them, actually. (also I'd appreciate not having my name published as the prompter of any of these, if you don't mind. I don't think you do that, as a general rule, but just in case you might have.) P.S. I adore your work; every day that you post something is a day considerably brightened for me. and also the other days, because I do a lot of rereading. <3 <3 <3

prompt 1: I'd love to see a niecest fic (where it is truly mutually requited, no hypnosis mindbreaks required; I'm a terribly softhearted romantic & just want to see them happy~) that incorporates your characterizations of the saber spirits somehow? Like, Baxia and Aituan, idk, end up like… bonded somehow by their masters getting together and that… maybe helps balance the qi deviations or IDK I WANT THEM TO BE HAPPY cough

ao3

So. We're doing something about this, right?

Baxia stirred. Slowly, like a great big old rumbling beast that was actually quite fast when it wanted to be, which knew that there was nothing in the world that could hurt it and anything foolish enough to do so was destined to a terrible fate of being played with and then demolished. Cruelly. Viciously.

Without remorse.

Yes, she said with admirable patience. We will do something about...'this'.

Oh good, Aituan said, amazed, surprised, and relieved that he'd survived this far into the conversation. Baxia was scary, all right? There were masterless sabers less scary than her. Daughter of the dragon, one of the best-forged blades in the sect, and she'd been used to her full potential, too - basically the opposite of Aituan in every way shape or form, really. It's just, you know, my human's been leaking again and I hate it when that happens.

Nie Huaisang might have some faults as a human, Aituan would allow (mostly because Nie Huaisang would similarly allow, and even seemed a bit proud of), but he was an excellent master. Sure, he might not cultivate Aituan all that much - it was kind of amazing Aituan had a personality at all rather than being a lifeless hunk of metal - but that was fine! Aituan, infected by his master’s shaping, didn't especially want to be constantly cultivating anyway. They didn't need that, the two of them. They were chill.

I thought he'd stopped leaking in the bed once he'd reached the appropriately age..?

Not that type of leaking! Leaking from the face, I mean. Salt water.

Ah, Baxia said. Yes, my human does that, too. Quite a bit. I'd assumed it was a regular part of their function.

Aituan thought about what he knew about the senior Nie brother, who was a highly emotional sort of person - inclined towards wet eyes for a myriad of reasons, such as joy, sadness, rage, a bit of passing beauty, and even something Nie Huaisang very fondly called 'allergies'. He could see how Baxia might have reached that conclusion.

Well, my human doesn't do it very much at all, he said. Not for real, anyway. Only when he's unhappy.

Baxia didn't say anything.

This will make him less unhappy, Aituan added, because he might be a mute piece of metal, but silence was a little intimidating when the silence was Baxia's. That shit had weight, and heft, and maybe stabbing power. He thinks revealing the extent of his desires will lead your master to reject him.

Absurd.

I know! Your master is doting and meticulous with his affections. He would never turn his back on a beloved one.

Nie Mingjue had the stubbornness of a saber in that way, and Aituan meant that as a wholehearted compliment. 

True, Baxia said, sounding satisfied - like any saber, she approved of people speaking highly about her master. Not to mention that the underlying 'issue' seems rather...pointless.

I know! Aituan exclaimed. I mean, I have no idea why humans are so hung up on all that grinding and grunting stuff -

I believe it's associated with human reproduction. Maybe.

Only when you have compatible male-female pairs, but you don't see humans stopping with that, do you? Aituan sighed. His master was something of an expert on this subject. Males, females, multiples, solo...you know, I think they do it for fun. 

Baxia rumbled thoughtfully. Like training?

...I think they think it’s more fun than training, Aituan said, and tried to ignore Baxia's silent skepticism. Most humans, anyway; not necessarily yours. Humans are weird, okay?

The silence turned agreeable. That was something no saber would disagree with.

Anyway, put that aside. Let’s just take it as given that humans like grinding themselves against each other instead of against a proper whetstone, and that my master happens to very much want to grind against yours in particular. And yet he's tormenting himself and making himself unhappy and refusing to do anything about it because - you won't believe this - because they were forged by the same maker.

That’s the reason? Surely you jest.

I'm not, Aituan insisted. I asked my human about it specifically. That's the reason.

Baxia was displeased. That's ridiculous, she said. That's it? That's the cause of all this fuss?

Aituan was just happy someone finally understood his perspective about this whole fiasco. Nie Huaisang had a penchant for the dramatic, but he seemed quite earnestly distressed by this little non-dilemma, even after Aituan had assured him - having checked with Baxia - that his brother adored him unreasonably and would do anything he wished. He hadn't exactly appreciated Aituan's disbelief when he'd explained the issue, either - in the end, he'd just said that it was probably something sabers couldn't quite grasp. 

I thought it was something serious, Baxia complained. The way my master has been carrying on, you'd think he was doing something evil in even wanting to do it. But there's no evil here! We would know!

Naturally. They were Nie sect sabers, forged and cultivated to fight evil from the very start; no one knew evil better than they. 

And it's not as if my master's predecessor was any better. Look at the unusual ingredients he chose to use in forging his sons! Each one stranger than the next!

This was true. Nie Huaisang had once grown a tail in his sleep - Aituan had suppressed it on his behalf, naturally, and he was fairly certain that his master still regarded the entire event as a bad dream brought on by snacking excessively on that imported cheese from the south, but it had definitely happened. 

The old Sect Leader Nie had a lot to answer for, really. 

It would seem to solve a lot of problems for them to pair off together, Aituan agreed. They're a known quantity for each other, and it keeps either of them from bothering anyone else with their nonsense. They’d be able to pick forging ingredients for the next generation on the basis of logic rather than emotion. And they both want it! There's literally no problem here!

None at all that I can see, Baxia proclaimedwith a very reassuring tone of finality. We will fix this.

Yes!

And we will fix your cultivation as well.

Ye- wait, what?

My master’s cultivation has begun to exceed my own, Baxia explained. Humans don't have a consolidation period - they just keep growing even after they reach a breakthrough point. If he continues to grow at the current rate, he will exceed my reach within ten years.

That…wasn't good. It was in fact very bad.

The Nie sect practiced a complementary cultivation style, human and saber cultivating side by side along the path of the Great Dao. If the two ever fell seriously out of sync, they would increasingly risk qi deviation. Such a tragic end had been the fate of the Nie sect seniors whose sabers now rested in the saber tombs, and would likely consume their own masters eventually, absent some plan...

...which it sounded like Baxia had.

You are a weak cultivator, she said. Your master is, too. If we redirect my master's cultivation for the purpose of strengthening you and your master instead of increasing his own strength, it would add at least two dozen years to the timeline - and that will be enough for me to finish consolidating my own power and reach my own breakthrough, letting me match him once more. My master and I will then be able to cultivate side by side through the next period. 

Huh. That meant work for him, which Aituan didn't especially want, but much less work than if he were doing all the cultivating himself. And it'd be good for his master, not needing to worry about losing his brother at a young age...

All right, he said. Say, how long is the next period? Until you run into another consolidation period and we need to start worrying again?

Baxia considered the question. Not terribly long, she said. Perhaps 200 years? Perhaps 250?

That seemed reasonable enough, right? How long did humans live, anyway? 

Well, whatever. It was more than ten - his master ought to be thanking him (and Baxia!) for putting in so much effort on his behalf. 

That's fine, Aituan said. All right, we're in agreement. So...now what? 

#mdzs #baxia #aituan #nie mingjue #nie huaisang #lots of headcanon references #my fic #my fics #rather silly