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mc-i-r · 9 months

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Disposable Heroes

Part one, Part two, Part three, Part four AO3 link

A/N: hi yes so sorry for how late this is, it turned into a huge monster of a fic that I’m still working on but I figured posting the first part wouldn’t hurt. This is based on this post by @liightsnow, @acowardinmordor, and @00biscuit while back and I decided to expand that concept a bit and here we are. I'll be tagging anyone that seemed interested in the concept at the end of the fic! Warnings are below but I just wanna say that Steve is struggling with his sexuality in this one so most of it comes from that. This will absolutely have a happy ending, just not right now. Enjoy the angst!

Tw: internalized homophobia, homophobic language, mentions of canon violence, dissociation, panic attacks

———

It’s a Sunday afternoon when he realizes it. Steve is sitting on his couch, eating a shitty frozen meal and watching a random movie on TV when it hits him. The kids haven’t asked him for a ride in two weeks. Two Saturdays have passed and there was not one call— either on the phone or over the walkie— from any of the kids. Not even Dustin, who has seemed to make it his life’s mission in the past couple years to annoy Steve into an early grave.

It’s not like he hasn’t seen them at all. He still practices basketball with Lucas on Thursdays, even though the season is long over. His weekly dinners with Claudia and Dustin are still going strong every Wednesday. Joyce seems to invite him over for dinners every couple weeks. From the outside, everything seems fine. And maybe it is, but Steve’s noticed things.

See, he’s not as stupid as people think he is. He may not be academically smart but he can read. However, instead of books, it’s people. He can read their micro-expressions, notice little signs in their body language that help him understand the person. He can tell when people are nervous when they avoid eye contact, can tell how anxious they are when they distract themselves by picking at their fingers. It’s how he’s so good with the kids. They’re in the stubborn stage of their teenage years, the time in which the only answer you’ll get is ‘I’m fine. Leave me alone’. But he can tell if there’s something on their minds, if there’s something eating away at them.

He can tell that Mike’s anger and pointed barbs are directed towards himself, how he’s struggling with something he can’t quite admit to himself yet. How Max is frustrated with her body, with accepting help, because she’s always had to rely on herself and putting that much trust in someone else has never been an option for her until now. How Lucas is trying to find joy in doing something he loves again, because his love for basketball has been ruined by Carver and his trusty band of assholes. How Dustin is trying to deal with almost losing Eddie, how he’s processing the feelings of almost losing a brotherly figure along with one of his friends. How Will is hiding part of himself, struggling to accept it in the same way Mike is. How El is trying so hard to find her new normal, to adjust to getting her life— her father— back.

There’s another thing he’s noticed, however. It’s that the kids are obsessed with Eddie. Steve from a couple years ago would feel jealous of Eddie, and would try to hold it against him. Now, though, Steve just feels… sad. The kids constantly talk about how cool and badass Eddie is for still being himself despite all the shit Hawkins has thrown at him. They talk about how Eddie takes them places, gets them little trinkets for their nerd game, and takes them fun places. Eddie does all these little things for the kids, lets them just be kids, and really, Steve can’t be mad at him for it. He tries to let them have fun, but his constant worrying overwhelms them. It brings them down. Eddie doesn’t do that. He joins right in with them, basking in the fun and letting himself go. Steve… can’t. Not with all the shit he’s seen. Letting his guard down is something he can’t afford to do anymore.

He sighs down at his meal, chucking it on the coffee table as he loses his appetite. His glasses land next to the disposable plastic tray, sliding across the finished wood surface from the force of his throw. He rubs harshly over his face, hands digging into his eyes until he sees stars.

Steve knows he’s not perfect. Hell, it took an interdimensional monster trying to kill him in order for him to realize that he could be a better person. That the only person truly able to change his life is himself. He used to think he had no choice in his life— whether it was his parents' high expectations of him or his friends trying to mold him into their perfect little plaything— but he knows better now. He knows that he shouldn’t have become King Steve, that he shouldn’t have hurled all his hate and anger towards other people who didn’t deserve it. He knows he shouldn’t have called people names or slurs, that he shouldn’t have spray painted lockers or ripped up books or shoved people against hard asphalt. He knows that, but knowing it was wrong doesn’t erase the fact that it happened. That Steve did those things and hurt people.

Part of him knows that his past is what made the kids turn towards Eddie. Why wouldn’t they? Steve was a bully, thought he was hot shit in school and made it everyone’s problem. Eddie was simply himself. His unabashed, unashamed self. He stood on cafeteria tables, made dramatic speeches, and shared his opinions to anyone and everyone who would listen. He’s so genuine and so, so much better for the kids. He teaches them how to be themselves, how to shove off the hate and embrace their weird side. He’s perfect for them, and Steve knows deep down that this is good for them. The kids need a good role model, one they can rely on, and Eddie has his herd of little sheep to teach and protect. It’s perfect. They’re perfect.

Steve remembers the time last week at the Byers-Hopper house when their little obsession truly became real. They were waiting for the bread to finish baking in the oven, and Steve saw that Will was seated alone in the living room. Joyce and Hopper were in the kitchen, talking and keeping a lookout so the bread wouldn’t burn. Jonathan and El were listening to music in his room, the synth and guitars echoing down the hallway. So, Steve decided to finally talk to Will. It’s not like they don’t talk ever, just… not much. Will is quiet, blends into the background, and Steve never felt like the kid would be comfortable with him trying to get in his business. However, he needed to ask the question that had been on his mind for a while.

Steve sat down on the couch next to him, keeping a fair amount of distance between them, and rested his elbows on his knees. Will was reading a comic, the cover full of bright colors and words, not paying attention. Steve sighed, pushed his glasses up, and ran a hand through his own hair.

“Hey, um… can we talk for a sec?”

Will startled a little, like he didn’t realize Steve was there, and closed his comic. He nodded, and Steve tried not to feel bad about the hesitation in his eyes.

“Is there something going on that I don’t know about? Like with the others?” Will’s eyebrows furrowed, a confused expression taking over his face.

“Um.. what do you mean?”

“Just… have I done anything to them to make them mad? I just… I don’t know, I feel like I’ve done something but I don’t know what,” Steve confessed. He must have looked as distraught as he felt, because Will seemed to soften at his explanation a bit.

“Why do you think that, Steve?” Will asked softly, and Steve had a moment of realization that Will seemed years older than he looked. Steve sighed, and explained that the kids haven’t really been hanging around him much and instead like to spend time with Eddie. He’s quick to clarify that he doesn’t mean anything bad by it, just wants to know what happened. It was Will’s turn to sigh, and he looked at Steve with something akin to sympathy.

“Steve, I don’t say this to be mean but… Eddie just relates to us more, you know? He shares more interests with us, and he seems to get us better,” Will expressed. His eyes widened and he hastily added, “it doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you! Just… it’s nice to have somewhere else to go, you know?”

The rest of the evening was spent with Steve silently eating his dinner, Will’s words echoing through his head as he munched on half-burnt bread.

Steve decides then, TV dinner half-eaten and work vest still on his shoulders, that he’s going to make this better.

The next day, Eddie comes into Family Video to pick up some movies, definitely for a movie night judging by the titles— he seriously doubts a metalhead would willingly watch The Goonies, The Dark Crystal, and Ghostbusters by himself on a Saturday night. Eddie bounds up to the register, movies in hand, and does a dramatic bow as he presents them to Steve.

“I wish to borrow these, my liege,” Eddie declares, his voice deep and in a horrible mockery of an English accent. Steve scoffs and rolls his eyes, unable to hide the small grin on his face at the other man's theatrics.

Eddie looks so effortlessly pretty, his hair tied back in a ponytail and his tattoos exposed through the large arm holes in his homemade tank top. Steve shakes his head to get rid of those thoughts and takes the movies to check them out, ignoring the late fee balance on Eddie's account. A glance at the man in front of him, who is bouncing on his toes and looking around the store, gives Steve an idea.

“Hey, is Hellfire still going on?”

Eddie snaps his attention back to Steve, looking a little startled to be asked such a thing.

“Uh… yeah, it's still going on. We have to play in Gareth’s hot ass garage since school is out but we’re making it work. Why d’you ask?”

“Oh, uh… the kids complained awhile back that they didn’t have a good spot to play anymore and I was just wondering,” Steve explains. Eddie raises an eyebrow at him, and Steve can feel him staring. Can feel him looking at him closely. Too closely. He clears his throat and looks back down at the counter, pushing his gold, wire-framed glasses further up his nose. “I uh… I actually wanted to offer up my place? My parents aren’t home much”— more like never— “and I’ve got plenty of space for the gremlins and the other guys. Plus, my A/C works and I’ve got a shit ton of snacks. I’ll stay out of your hair and-“

“Actually uh…” Eddie cuts him off with a strained voice. Steve looks up to find his face contorted like he ate something sour, and he knows what his response is going to be before he opens his mouth. Eddie wipes a hand over his mouth before shoving it in his pocket. “Yeah, the other guys just… really wouldn’t want to be there.”

Steve nods— tries not to let the denial sting— and looks down at the movies in his hands. Ignoring how they shake, he sets them on the counter and slides them towards Eddie.

“That’s okay man, I get it. I need a break from the little horrors anyway,” he huffs out, the words digging their way into the pit in his stomach. He puts on his best customer service smile and looks up at Eddie, finding him looking a little wary. Eddie hesitates, as if debating with himself on whether or not to say anything, before rapping his knuckles on the counter in a little rhythm and picking up his movies. An awkward smile finds its way to his face, and Steve thinks it strange and out of place. It’s so.. un-Eddie-like. The pit grows deeper.

Walking backwards towards the entrance, Eddie throws a little salute his way before turning and swinging out the door. A belated “see ya, Harrington” drifts through the closing door in his wake.

Steve slumps over the counter when he’s gone, holding his head in his hands and feeling the childish urge to cry make its way up to his eyes. Even after everything— after walking through hell together, dragging his lifeless body out of the Upside Down as his blood dripped down his back and soaked through his clothes, standing vigil at his side until he woke up two weeks later— Eddie still seems to hate him.

But Steve… he feels the opposite. He has this overwhelming desire to be with Eddie. To hang out with him in the back of his van, drinking sodas and eating snacks as they look out over Lover’s Lake while the sun sets. To talk to him until the early hours of the morning until there’s nothing left to say. To go for drives late at night and listen to his loud music on the radio while holding hands over the center console. He has feelings for Eddie he’s never had before. Not for any past romantic conquests nor any girl. Hell, not even for Nancy. He’s never felt this intense need to be near someone before, and it scares him. It truly terrifies him.

He’s not homophobic— his platonic soulmate is a lesbian, for Christ's sake— but the fact that he feels this way is just… wrong to him. How is Steve Harrington, ladies’ man and charmer extraordinaire, into dudes? What is he, like, half gay? It just doesn’t make sense, doesn’t seem right, for him to feel like this. He sighs into his hands, digging his palms into his eyes until he sees stars. He can’t be thinking about this now, he can’t be thinking about this at all. He needs to shove it in the box in the back of his head where all the hard feelings go, waiting and festering to be dealt with later. He needs to, but he doesn’t know if he can.

Fuck, he needs to talk to Robin. Shit- can he though? What if what he’s feeling is a fluke or something? What if it’s just in his head because he’s desperate? What if Robin thinks he’s making fun of her and won’t take him seriously? It’s not fair of him to throw all his problems on her, even if he thinks she could help. It’s not her job to look after him, to take care of him. He can do that himself. He can figure this out himself.

Distantly, the words of Richard Harrington play in his ears. About how being gay is wrong, how it’s a disease. How it’s a sickness that slowly takes over until there’s nothing left. How it’s a disgrace.

He remembers sitting in the living room with his parents on a rare occasion in which they were home, watching the news channel as it talked about an epidemic spreading through young men. His father scoffed at the screen when they started talking about potential cures.

“Cures? They should just let those fags die. They brought this on themselves, you know. Typical of them to complain about the fucking consequences,” Richard had spat out at the block TV, standing to refill his bourbon. Steve had clenched his fists at his side, his already stiff posture straightening still. He felt angry at his fathers words, something pure and burning in his gut.

He didn’t know what it was at the time, but maybe he should’ve known. Maybe him being queer shouldn’t be as much of a surprise as it feels. Maybe he’s always known and just couldn’t bring himself to admit it. Maybe that anger he felt at his father’s words was partly on behalf of himself, too.

A wince shudders through him as he remembers how that night ended.

Steve had stood up from the couch, watching the dark liquid flow into the crystal glass in his father’s hand.

“What’s so wrong with being gay? I don’t understand how you could just.. hate people like that. Hate them for just existing,” Steve countered. His father had frozen at his words, slowly setting down the decanter with a solid ‘thunk’ against the metal tray where it belonged and turned to face him. His face was slowly gaining a reddish hue, a sign of the anger rising within him.

“What did you just say?” He demanded, voice scarily calm but laced with an icy rage. Steve swallowed.

“What… What's wrong with being gay, sir?” Steve hesitated, voice failing him. Richard had downed the glass of bourbon before throwing it at Steve, the crystal shattering on the mantelpiece behind him and sending shards flying.

“What’s wrong, Steven, is that you think it’s okay. No son of mine will think like that, not on my watch,” his father boomed, taking long strides towards him. Steve didn’t dare move, only watched his fist grow nearer as he punched him high on his cheek. He fell to the floor, arms trying to protect his head but it was no use. Richard had ripped his arms away, gripping the front of his shirt and making Steve hover above the ground.

“I didn’t raise a fucking fairy, Steven,” he spat. “A faggot.” Steve recoiled, physically feeling the vitriol his father aimed at his face. Richard had sneered, pulled him close and whispered, “Never forget that, Steven,” before shoving him harshly onto the ground and walking away. Black had clouded the edges of his vision, and he laid on the plush rug until it cleared up. He looked over, found his mother silently watching the TV and sipping her wine, and begged with his eyes for her to help him. To say something. Anything. She didn’t, and Steve had to haul himself off the floor, grasping the couch when his vision swam, and stumbled his way to his room.

The rest of that weekend was spent in his room, gingerly cleaning his face and the couple places where glass had cut him on his arms with a wet washcloth and soap. It was the first time he had ever gotten a concussion. He was fifteen.

He remembers replaying the fight over and over again, feeling like those barbs were directed towards him, too. In hindsight, maybe they were. Maybe his father just knew. Knew he was queer long before Steve ever did. Maybe that’s why he’s always so angry with him, so… disappointed. A groan escapes him and he runs a hand through his hair. He’s been thinking way too damn much for it to be this early in the day.

God, he really wishes Robin was here. He knows he can’t talk to her, but it would be nice just to have someone here to keep him from spiraling and drowning in his thoughts. He pushes himself off the counter and goes over to the cart where the returns sit, hoping that busying himself will occupy his thoughts. He sets a few on the shelves when what Eddie said earlier barrels into him full-force.

“Yeah, the other guys just… really wouldn’t want to be there.”

Jesus fucking Christ, he’s stupid. Of course the other Hellfire guys wouldn’t want to be at his house, they probably still see him as King Steve. Most people do, nowadays. Only the ones he went through hell with know he’s different now, that he’s changed. So really, he can’t fault them for being against the idea of Hellfire at his house. He wouldn’t believe it either if he was in their shoes.

Then again, wouldn’t Eddie or the kids try to convince them he’s different? That he’s not a dick? Shit, he’s been through four apocalypses, three concussions, and survived Russian torture— surely they would give him the benefit of the doubt, right? He’s dropped the bad influences out of his life, found better friends, better family— or can he even say that anymore?— to be with. Wouldn’t they try to stick up for him? Or... is he just not worth it?

Steve clenches his eyes shut, willing his bubbling emotions back down, and grips the movie in his hands so hard the plastic begins to creak. The little voice in his head, one that sounds suspiciously like Robin, tells him to breathe. He does. Deep inhale, hold, long exhale. Over and over and over again until he’s calm, until his head is clear.

He knows what he needs to do now: apologize. If it's one thing Steve Harrington knows, it’s how to apologize. Hell, he’s done it more times than he can count. He knows how to repair burnt bridges and how to get past the tough exterior of a person to pull at their heartstrings for sympathy. He knows the key; he just has to make himself useful. If he can provide things for the kids, for Eddie and the Hellfire crew, then they’ll want him around. That’s how it’s always been. That’s how it is with his parents, with school, with his past friends, and now his current ones. He vaguely recalls his junior year art teacher saying that, "once is an accident, twice is a coincidence, but thrice is a pattern." Which means this, this is something he has to make right.

With a plan solidified in his mind, he goes back to work refilling the shelves with movies, brainstorming ideas to get his family back.

Over the next week, Steve becomes a one man show. He offers up more rides, more movie nights, more free reign of his house and his pool and his car and his money and himself just to make the kids happy. He picks up extra shifts at work just to get extra spending money for them, knowing that they go through twenty bucks in no time.

But… it doesn’t work. Because bit by bit, ride by ride, movie marathon by family dinner by game night by post-nightmare phone call, it becomes painfully clear. Everyone puts on a mask around him. One that says they’re happy to see him, that they’re glad he’s here, but he knows it’s a lie. This, really, shouldn’t be much of a surprise. People don’t stick around him much, so why did he think this was any different?

Maybe it’s because he was finally himself around them, he finally opened up and showed a bit of his true self, and was still rejected. Still pushed away. He wasn’t cowering behind a mask this time, he was just Steve. But it wasn’t good enough. He wasn’t good enough.

To their credit, it starts off slow. Casual comments that are cut off quickly, kicks under dinner tables and pointed throat clearing. It’s one instance during game night where it all clicks.

The Monopoly board is spread out before them in the Byers-Hopper living room. Steve, of course, is losing. He’s not good with investments and savings and he keeps landing on the goddamn ‘jail’ space but he doesn’t really care, not when he’s finally having fun with the kids. He groans when the dice make him land on one of Mike’s properties, shuffling his fake cash to pull out the tax money.

“C’mon this game is totally rigged. How the hell am I losing to a bunch of teens?” He grumbles as Mike proudly snatches the money from his hand. Max snickers from her place beside him, her pale blue eyes rolling as she looks at him.

“You know, if you actually used your brain then maybe you wouldn’t be losing. Ever think of that?” She quips, and Steve huffs. Leave it to him to be called out by a fifteen year old.

“I’m surprised there’s even a brain in there to begin with,” Dustin states. He’s seated across from Steve. “I mean, why else would he have-“

His comment is cut off by Lucas smacking his arm. Dustin looks at him like he’s about to protest when Lucas raises his eyebrows, looking pointedly from Dustin to Steve and back again. Steve can’t hear from his position so far away, but he swears Dustin mutters “shit” before crossing his arms and looking down at the board. Steve looks around at the rest of the group, noticing how none of them seem to want to look at him, choosing to focus rather intently on the cardboard before them.

The rest of the game is filled with awkward silences. Steve can feel them looking at him when he’s occupied, and it makes him feel like shit inside.

It’s on the drive home when it hits him. He is the one that doesn’t fit into their group, into their family. They’re slowly but surely removing him and replacing him with Eddie. With someone who fits. With someone better. It hits him so hard, so fully, that he has to pull over on a quiet street to sob in his empty car.

The first time it's fully solidified in his mind is at a barbecue at the Byers-Hoppers house. Robin can’t come, her aunt from up north is visiting for the weekend and she has to stay home. Steve walks through the house, planning on saying hello to Joyce before joining the party outside. He finds Joyce talking low to Eddie in the kitchen and he pauses in the doorway, watches how Joyce laughs at something Eddie says. How she places her hand on his arm as her eyes crinkle with the weight of her laugh. Eddie is smiling, open and wide, with a flush high on his cheeks that stains his skin pink. His dimples are on full display and it takes pure willpower for Steve not to go and poke at them, to settle his thumb in the divot of his skin.

Joyce leans close to Eddie and says something under her breath, making him blush purely red now and shush her, causing another wave of laughter to ripple through the both of them. The kitchen is filled with warmth, the afternoon sunlight streaming in through the sheer cream-colored curtains that line the two windows as laughter fills the room. It’s light, it’s happiness, it’s love. It’s something Steve hasn’t felt in years.

Steve knocks on the doorframe, waggling his fingers in greeting. They both turn to look at him, and all that warmth from before flees the room. If he hadn’t just seen the thin rays with his own two eyes, he could have sworn even the sun went down as well. He feels a stab of pain in his heart, so sharp it makes his breath stutter. He fights to put a smile on his face, briefly clearing his throat and praying his voice doesn’t sound as faint as he feels.

“Hey, Ms. Byers. Eddie,” he greets. Steve runs a hand through his hair, just to give himself something to do. “Just wanted to say hi before I go outside.”

Eddie’s face has gone completely slack, the only thing convincing Steve he didn’t hallucinate the entire exchange earlier is the flush that had yet to leave his cheeks. In fact, Eddie looks even more red now that he’s made his presence known. Joyce, to her credit, has a small polite smile on her face.

“Thank you, Steve, that's very kind of you,” she replies. She casts a glance at Eddie out of the corner of her eye, something Steve has noticed a lot of people do to each other when he’s around. “You go on outside now, okay? I’m sure the kids are missing you.”

Steve holds back his remark of “yeah, I actually doubt that” and nods, leaving the two of them in the kitchen as he continues down the hallway. He tries hard not to let the harshness of their quick whispers dig further into his already injured heart.

Once outside, he’s greeted by no one. Dustin and Lucas are discussing something rapidly to one another, Dustin gesturing wildly with his hands as Lucas nods along and adds details. Max and El are sitting on a lawn chair together, Max seemingly teaching El how to braid her hair. Mike and Will are sitting in the grass a bit away from the group, shoulders touching and heads bowed together as they talk quietly to one another. Steve smiles softly at them, knowing.

He makes his way over to Hopper, who is manning the grill with a beer in one hand and a spatula in the other. Steve waves and gives him an awkward little smile, and Hopper nods his head, pointing towards a cooler with his beer. Steve grabs one, popping it open and taking an, admittedly, big first swig. Hopper doesn’t notice, or at least doesn’t comment, and Steve looks out over the people he still considers his family. He catches Dustin’s eyes, hoping to have someone to talk to, but the kid only looks away and continues his conversation.

So now Steve is here by himself, slowly nursing a beer, and trying to keep his emotions in check.

It’s just that… he doesn’t know what he did. Was he too overbearing or did he not care enough? Was he too pushy or too distant? Was he just annoying them? Was he just an inconvenience? Did they ever really like him or did they just put up with them out of necessity? Or because they felt bad?

He takes another sip of beer, hating the way it tastes on his tongue but it’s better than the bile slowly rising in his throat. All he wants is for someone to see him, to see who he truly is and like it. To stick around. To stay.

And it’s true, he does have Robin, but sometimes she can’t give him what he needs. Call him a romantic but Steve wants that love, that connection, that intense feeling you get with a partner. He craves it more than anything. He wants to touch, to taste, to feel someone else.

Eddie. He wants Eddie.

A voice interrupts his thoughts.

“Kid, will you go get me a plate for the burgers?” Hopper asks, his gruff voice shoving all of his mushy thoughts aside. Steve nods, sets his beer on top of the cooler, and makes his way inside. He silently dreads ever walking in that room again, dreads having to feel the chill from before. However, the scene in the kitchen is drastically different this time. Joyce is by herself, Eddie nowhere to be seen, and is mixing together slaw in a big tupperware bowl.

Steve knocks on the frame again and is met with a small smile from the older woman. It’s infinitely more warm than the one he was met with when he got there, and he thinks it’s partly due to the lack of a certain metalhead in the room. Joyce sets down her spoon, wiping her hands on a nearby towel, and holds her arms out.

“C’mere, honey,” she murmurs, and Steve tries not to let her soft tone get to him. The last thing he needs is to cry in front of everyone. He walks forwards into her hug, leaning down a little to wrap his arms around her properly, and sighs when she rubs her hands up and down his back. Steve clenches his eyes shut, taking in stuttering breaths that he knows she can hear but thanks every god out there that she doesn’t comment on it. She taps her hands twice on his back and pulls away, reaching up to push some of his hair off his forehead and Steve wills himself to not lean into the touch too much.

“Sorry for not saying a proper hello earlier, I was a bit preoccupied. Eddie- well, that’s not my thing to tell but he needed some help with something and… well, you get it,” she smiles, laughs a little, and Steve smiles back.

This. This is what he wishes he could have with his parents. This lightness, this love. He never will, he knows that, but the little moments like this with Joyce, the way she hugs him and cares for him, are ones he treasures. Ones he wishes he could have everyday. Joyce is a wonderful mother, and part of him wishes he could have her as his own. Hell, she’s been more of a mother to him in the four years he’s known her than his mother ever has. But he knows that isn’t fair. It isn’t fair of him to put his parental issues on her or anyone else. So he doesn’t, and shoves his hands in his pockets instead.

“It’s okay, Ms. Byers, I get it. Sorry to interrupt you two, though,” he apologizes. She waves her hands in a shooing motion.

“Oh don’t apologize for that, honey, it’s okay,” she smiles, then hesitates. “I do want you to promise me something, okay?” Steve nods, and Joyce places her hands on either side of his face. “Promise me you’ll be careful with people, be gentle. Not everyone can be treated the same, some people… they’re special.

“Sometimes, it’s better to listen. Promise me, Steve, that you’ll always listen, okay?” She asks, and Steve has to swallow before he responds.

“I promise, Ms. Byers,” he replies, and she pats his cheek. Her smile has grown, and her eyes have softened.

“I love you, Steve, you know that, right?” Joyce asks, and it’s like the world has stopped moving. He didn’t know that, not really. Sure, he knew she liked him but he didn’t know she…

He doesn’t realize he’s tearing up until Joyce coos at him, wiping away a few stray tears that have escaped with her thumbs.

“I-I didn’t know you- I’m sorry, I don’t-“ Steve stutters out, but Joyce shushes him.

“You don’t have to apologize, Steve, it’s alright,” she insists. Her thin arms pull him into another hug and he buries his face in her shoulder. The angle is a little awkward, but it’s a comfort Steve hasn’t had in ages so he stays. “It’s gonna be alright.”

Her small hands rub up and down his back as he holds back tears. He regulates his breathing, taking in deep breaths and letting them out slowly, until he’s sure he won’t cry. He pulls back from the hug and wipes at his eyes, sure that they're red-rimmed and a little puffy, but Joyce only smiles that warm smile and pats his cheek again. Steve smiles at her, the first genuine smile he thinks he’s had in awhile, and it feels good. To smile and know it's real.

Joyce turns to the counter behind her and picks up a plate, handing it to Steve. His brows furrow, and he hesitantly takes the offered crockery.

“How did you-“

“I had a feeling,” she interrupts him with a wink. “Now go on before Hop burns the yard down.”

Steve smiles and goes back outside, handing the plate to Hop and ignoring his grumble of “took ya long enough”, before picking his beer back up and taking a much needed swig. A few minutes later, they’re all eating. Eddie has joined Dustin and Lucas in their rambling, all three of them loudly talking over one another. Steve watches them; wishing, wanting, yearning. Joyce bumps her shoulder into his, making him swivel his head to look down at her. She smiles, almost knowingly, and Steve blushes. He clears his throat and looks away, focusing on fixing his burger rather than whatever the fuck that was.

He sits alone away from the group, catching occasional glances from Joyce, Dustin, and Hopper. Joyce is concerned, he can tell that much, and part of her almost looks sad. Dustin looks conflicted, like he can’t decide if he wants to be mad from a distance or just come right up to Steve and say it to his face. Steve wouldn’t be surprised if he did the latter. Hopper, to Steve’s complete unsurprise, looks uninterested and, frankly, fed up with this whole situation. Steve doesn’t blame him, he is too.

After the food is gone, and dessert is served, Steve heads inside to help clean up. He washes dishes quietly with Joyce, while she dries them and puts them away. As he finishes up the last plate, Will comes into the kitchen.

“Hey, Mom? The party wanted to play some board games, is that okay?” He requests, and Steve can feel Joyce soften beside him. She smiles.

“Of course, honey. Make sure you ask the girls what they want to play, too, okay?” Will rolls his eyes and smiles, a mannerism Steve notes he definitely got from Mike.

“Got it, Mom,” he replies, and runs off. Steve turns back to the sink, realizing he’s been scrubbing the plate well past the point of clean, and rinses it off.

“I um.. I think I’m going to head out, Ms. Byers,” he begins. He hands the plate to her. “I’ve got a shift tomorrow and uh… I don’t want to intrude or anything.”

He doesn’t mention that he doesn’t want to repeat the last game night, where everyone kept glancing at him like he was a bomb set to explode at any moment. He doesn’t say that he can’t handle their stares for any longer than he already has.

“Oh, are you sure? You’re welcome to stay here as long as you want to,” Joyce offers, but Steve shakes his head.

“I really should be going, sorry.”

“Alright, dear. Let me walk you out,” she insists, moving to take off her apron.

“I’ll walk him out, Joyce, don’t worry about it,” Hopper's gruff voice interrupts from the doorway. Steve swallows and nods, drying his hands off on a towel. He looks at Joyce, seeing her share a glance and a smile with Hopper before looking back at him. He smiles, finally beginning to think that maybe… maybe things will be okay.

“Thank you, Ms. Byers. For everything,” he expresses. He leans down to give her a hug, her arms quickly hugging him back.

“It’s alright, dear. You come to me if you ever want to talk, you hear?” Steve pulls away from the hug.

“I will, promise,” he hesitates. Steve looks down at his hands, shaking from where they’re clutching each other, and takes a breath. “I… I love you too.”

He looks up right as Joyce pulls him into another hug. He laughs a little, and she pats his back before pulling away with a “be safe”. Hopper clears his throat from the door and Steve takes a step back, nods to Joyce, and follows the other man outside.

They step out on the front porch together, and Steve is prepared to continue walking to his car when Hop places a hand on his shoulder. He stops, and turns to find the man looking at him seriously.

“Son, I want you to promise me something,” he grumbles, and Steve begins to feel a strange sense of deja vu. While Joyce’s tone was soft, Hopper’s is deep and leaves no room for hesitation. He vaguely has a thought that this is what his father would have been like if things were different. If he were different. Steve nods.

“Promise me you’ll fix our shit, alright? I don’t wanna get in the middle of… whatever the hell this is but promise you’ll be better, okay?” He commands, and all the thoughts Steve had earlier about thinking things would be okay fly out the window.

“Y-yes, sir,” he stutters out. Hop claps his shoulder, mumbles a “get home safe”, before pulling a pack of smokes out his pocket and lighting one up. Steve turns, shoves his shaking hands in his pockets, and walks to his car.

Getting in his car is a blur of unconscious actions. He’s driving down a barely lit backroad when he registers that his eyes are stinging, and something warm and wet is dripping down his cheeks. He pulls over on the side of the road, shifting his car into park, and he sits there. He reaches up with a shaky hand and wipes his cheek, his hand coming back wet and shining in the faint glow of the moon. The sight breaks him, and an ugly sob rips its way out his throat. He chokes on an inhale as tears fight their way out, and he hugs his arms around himself as a sad semblance of comfort. His forehead finds purchase on the steering wheel, and his tears stain the leather before dripping on his lap.

He cries because he knows he’s the problem, that he’s the one fucking up. He cries because everyone thinks so, everyone knows. The kids know. Eddie knows. Joyce knows, but she’s just too kind to say it to his face. Hell, even Hopper knows. He cries because he doesn’t know what he did wrong. He cries because he doesn’t think anyone really wants him to fix it.

It’s the second time on a drive home from the Byers-Hopper house that he has to pull over and cry.

He struggles to inhale a deep breath and sits up, harshly wiping his tears away with his hand, uncaring that it rubs his skin raw and red. Sniffling, he puts his car in drive and goes home. Toeing his shoes off at the door is the only thing he thinks to do before he stumbles his way upstairs and collapses on his bed, snuggling into the thin comforter and falling into a fitful sleep.

After a slow shift at Family Video the next day, Steve returns to the darkness of his home with a plan. He can still be useful. They may not have to know, but he can still do something to help. To try and save them before they need to be saved. He can be a preventative measure for them, can stop them from getting hurt before they even know they’re in danger.

He shrugs off his work vest, throwing it on his desk chair as he searches his closet for an old sweatshirt. He finds one, the front adorned with white block letters that read ‘Tigers Swim Team’ and tugs it on. His nail bat finds purchase in his hand as he tucks a flashlight in his back pocket. The walkie Dustin gave him is hooked in his belt loop, just in case. He leaves all the lights on in the house and shuts the door, skirting around his house to begin his walk in the woods.

After four bouts with the Upside Down, he doubts that they’re in the clear, that it’s finally over. He thought it was the first time, then the second, and by the third he was skeptical. Now, though, he doesn’t know what to think. He wouldn’t be surprised if there was a round five, or six, or seven. Hell, he wouldn’t be surprised if it never stopped. But each and every time, they were unprepared. They were surprised, and it nearly cost them every time. But if Steve could prevent that surprise, give them all a heads up before it becomes a big problem, then maybe— just maybe— it’ll come in handy. He’ll come in handy. He’ll be useful again.

So, he walks the woods of Hawkins. His feet crunch the dead leaves piled underneath trees as he trudges through the woods. The flashlight shines long shadows on the ground in front of him, lighting up the pale gray bark of trees and making the eyes of rodents and raccoons shine amber and red.

A rustle sounds a few feet away and he jumps at the noise. He pauses and stands still, listening for the shrill chittering of demodogs or the heavy, thudding footsteps of a demogorgon. He waits, and his flashlight reveals a small fox walking out from behind a tree. He lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding and continues walking.

His feet carry him to Lover’s Lake, the water lapping lazily at the shore with the warm summer breeze. Out here, the lights from town are distant, making the stars shine brightly and reflect in the water. Steve stands there, watches as the artificial light of his flashlight reveals the small ripples on the surface of the water, and waits.

He waits for a lumbering figure to emerge out of the murky depths, to claw its way onto the shore and stalk off into the woods. He waits for chirps muffled by water and splashing to sound in his ears as four-legged creatures swim to the beaches. He waits for the screeches of demonic bats to echo off the trees around him as they fly out of the water and take to the sky. He waits, but it never comes. The lake stays silent.

So he walks.

He follows the road leading to the lake out, letting it take him to the highway that leads out of town. His feet stop as they come across a crack in the road, the crack he took in the other world to get Eddie home safely. The crack that is closed over with black tar, leaving a dark line on the ashen gray asphalt. He remembers clawing his way out of that crack, Eddie’s lifeless body over his shoulders as he slowly bled out.

Nancy had driven her station wagon over, opening the back so he could lay Eddie down as they rode to the hospital. She had asked Steve to drive so she could patch him up, but he refused. He couldn’t leave Eddie, not when he finally got him out. Not when he was barely hanging on. So she threw the first aid kit she had stashed in her car at him and drove to the hospital. Steve had done his best to stop the bleeding, the stark white cloth immediately turning red when he pressed it to Eddie’s skin. They almost lost him. But they didn’t. He’s alive.

Eddie. Eddie.

His head swivels to the forest next to him, the one that leads straight to the trailer park, and he runs. He jumps over fallen trees, feet thudding against the dry earth and leaves as his breath picks up. Orange street lights shine through branches as he draws nearer, and he only slows his pace when he breaks out from the line of trees. His feet swiftly take him to the sight of Eddie’s old trailer, the vacant lot standing out against the fullness of the park. The wooden front steps are still there, partially broken and shifted. The grass has yet to grow in fully, bare spots of dirt showing through the green. His shoes crunch on the gravel as he takes a step closer, inspecting the ground and poking at it with his bat as if it would move. As if the gate would open up just by him being here.

It doesn’t. Steve steps back.

He turns to leave the park, eyes wandering and finding a familiar cream-colored van parked at a trailer a few rows away. Eddie and his Uncle were granted a new trailer for their trouble, really the bare minimum they deserve after all the shit they went through, but they took it in stride. Eddie and Wayne spent the first few weeks after spring break making it into their new home once Eddie was released from the hospital, and Steve had done his best to help them out. But he knew they needed time alone, time to heal, so he let them be. He hasn’t been back there since then.

He kicks a stray piece of gravel, watching as it tumbles a few feet away and disappears into the grass, as he makes his way out of Forest Hills. Houses blur by as he walks the residential streets, only stopping when his own comes into view. Steve sighs, and walks up the concrete driveway, through the large wooden doors, and into the silence of his house. He doesn’t bother taking off his shoes, reveling a little in the dirty footprints he leaves behind on his mothers’ ornate runner that covers the length of the hallway. The analog on the stove tells him it's a little past three in the morning, and he sighs. Grabbing a glass from the cabinet, he fills it up with water before shuffling out of the kitchen. He flops on the couch, sips his water, and waits.

He waits for the sun to peek over the trees in the backyard, casting long shadows on the curtains that cover the windows and glass doors. He waits for the warm rays to shine through the large window in the living room, the one that faces the road, and light up the rug that rests under the coffee table in soft hues of yellow. He sits his empty glass on the table. He waits. And he gets up.

He goes upstairs, changes his shirt, and grabs his vest. Steve slips the walkie off his belt loop and places it on his desk, the flashlight landing right beside it. He props the bat next to his chair, and Steve looks at it, looks at the bent nails sticking haphazardly out of the wood and how it splintered in places from too much force. How some of the nails are covered in dried, blackened goop and dirt. How it's sharp and dangerous, a weapon. How it’s chosen to protect.

At this moment, Steve feels like the bat. The rough wood is his exterior, the splinters through it are the cracks. The holes in his facade. The places where people got too close, where people hurt him. The nails are what makes him strong. They’re the kids, Joyce and Hop, Eddie and Robin. They’re his family. They mold him into a weapon meant to protect, to keep them safe.

But just like Steve, the bat isn’t needed until it’s necessary. Until the world is ending. But until that time comes, the bat is left out of sight. It’s hidden away, moved from place to place just in case, but never used. Never wanted.

Steve walks out the door.

His shift at Family Video passes by like every other day, slow and full of know-it-all customers that never seem to understand that he can’t magically summon movies out of his ass whenever they ask. Robin comes in around lunchtime, and they spend the rest of their joint shift making fun of the ridiculous movie covers that adorn various romcoms. He goes home alone, sheds his vest, and once again walks the town of Hawkins.

He does it again the next night. And the night after that. And the night after that. Until it’s been a week and Steve hasn’t slept for more than a couple hours a night. He doesn’t mind, just means there’s less nightmares to wake him up before sunrise.

Less nights where chittering and the thuds of heavy footsteps strike fear down to his core. Less nights where the chill of fog and night air pierce his skin, warring with his senses against the hot breath hitting the back of his neck from deadly flower-shaped mouths. Less nights where the harsh scraping of monstrous nails against rusted metal and the echoey bangs of heavy, meaty bodies against solid bus walls fill his ears. Less nights where he can feel the thick, choking air of the tunnels, can feel the wispy particles filling his lungs and coating the inside of his mouth.

Less nights filled with muffled Russian echoing in his ears, the harsh texture of rope around his wrists, arms, and chest. Less nights where the sickening crunch of fists against bone and the metallic taste of blood in his mouth linger for hours after he’s awoken, shallowly breathing and pleading to be let go. Less nights where he can feel the blood in his teeth, coating his tongue and dripping down the back of his throat, and he has to run to the bathroom to puke the phantom feeling away.

Less nights he wakes up alone, empty house hollow around him. Less nights he cries to himself in the silence of his room, wishing, hoping, yearning for something. For something to happen, to change. For something to get better. For him to get better.

On the eighth night, he finds his feet have taken him to the edge of Hawkins. The brown road sign reads ‘Leaving Hawkins! Come Again Soon!’, and it stares at him from a few feet away. He looks past the sign at the stretch of road that disappears around a curve, trees following the line of asphalt and distant street lights lighting up their leaves with an orange glow.

He thinks about what it would be like to leave Hawkins, to pack up his clothes in his car and leave town. To follow the road and go around that curve, to not worry about ever coming back. No one needs him here, not anymore, so what’s holding him back?

Maybe this will fix him.

Robin might miss him for a bit, probably curse him and his whole family when she figures it out, but she’ll move on. She’ll find someone better. Hell, she’ll probably go to Eddie too. They already have some sort of secret friendship thing going on between them anyway. Really, he wouldn’t blame her.

Eddie probably wouldn’t care. Shit, he might even throw a party celebrating the fact that he’s gone. Steve snorts at the thought, closing his eyes and taking a breath.

Would it really be so bad if he just disappeared?

But then there’s the kids, left behind with no one to protect them. Sure, Robin and Eddie and Nancy are here, but Nancy is off to Emerson in the fall, Robin surely bound to follow in similar footsteps, and Eddie has made it well-known that he’s getting the hell out of here. If everyone is gone, who will be here to protect them when it comes back?

He rakes a hand harshly through his hair, pulling a bit at the ends and hating how greasy it feels on his fingertips. He can’t think like that, he’ll just worry himself into a panic and that’s the last thing he needs right now; a panic attack on the side of the road. He turns around, walking back towards town as the sky fades into light. He gets home right when sunlight begins burning the tops of the trees and collapses on the couch, sleeping until his noon shift.

He’s exhausted when he gets home, having to close up Family Video after a ten hour shift by himself, but he knows he can’t sleep. Not now. So he does what he usually does now when he gets home and grabs his essentials for his rounds, something that’s become routine for him.

He shrugs off his work clothes, replacing it with what has become his patrol outfit; the old swim team sweatshirt and a faded, ripped pair of light blue jeans. The sweatshirt is filled with holes, the baggy sleeves having caught on briars and branches alike, that allow the white of his shirt to show through. The jeans share a similar fate, the knees scraped up and the denim fraying from the unhemmed edges.

His white Nikes are stained a gray-ish brown from the nightly treks through the woods, small bits of leaves and debris sticking to the laces and in the grooves of the tread. The flashlight finds its place in his back left pocket, an extra pair of batteries landing in his front pocket after an incident a few nights ago where his flashlight died on him out in the middle of nowhere— he was forced to stumble through the woods until the sun began to rise and he was able to find his way back home. He didn’t sleep that night.

The nail bat is crusted with dried bits of mud sticking to the slowly rusting metal, shredded bits of leaves and undergrowth tangled in a green and brown mass. Clumps of dirt litter the floor under the bat, and likely mark a line in the hallway from his room down to the front door. Steve hopes it's still there if his parents come home.

It’s dark outside, only the street light at the end of the driveway illuminates the concrete and stepping stone pathway to the front door. Steve steps out on the front stoop, taking a deep breath of cool summer night air, and starts walking.

He walks out onto the street, uncaring at this point if anyone sees him or not. What does he have to lose? Hopper would probably tell him he’s stupid— something he’s well aware of at this point— and tell him to go inside. Or maybe he would drive him home, take the bat, and leave.

A small, traitorous part of Steve wants Hop to find him. Wants him to ask what the hell he’s doing walking around at night alone in the dark. Wants him to coax him in his old beat up truck and take him back to the Byers’ house. Wants some of Joyce’s hot chocolate as he sits on the couch and explains what he’s been doing, what’s been going on. Ask, desperately, why everyone hates him. Wants them to tell him he’s wrong, that no one hates him. That it’s just a misunderstanding.

But it doesn’t happen. All of that is a lie.

It’s a lie Steve has secretly been telling himself under the cover of darkness alone in his bed, lying awake and exhausted but unable to sleep. It’s a lie he tells himself when he sees any of the kids so he can act normal, act okay. It’s a lie he tells himself when Eddie grins at him, wide and gleaming, eyes sparkling with the afternoon sun beaming in from the storefront windows.

It’s those grins, those looks Eddie gives him sometimes that almost convinces him the lie is fake. Like Eddie is sharing an inside joke with him, only Steve doesn’t know what it is. Eddie doesn’t come around often but when he does… god, it’s like he’s the only one in the room.

Eddie looks at him with his whole body, always focusing on him so wholly and touching in some way. A hand on his bicep, an arm slung around his shoulder, even his arms wrapped around his waist one time. He was friendly, they were friends, until he wasn’t. Until Steve did something stupid that he still can’t figure out and Eddie is avoiding him.

The crunch of gravel under his sole brings him back into his head a little. He looks up, finding the pale orange glow of a lamp through a trailer window, and curses. His feet have brought him to where his mind always seems to go these days: Eddie.

He stands outside of the trailer, watching the way the little bits of weeds around the base shift and sway in the wind. The sky is filled with patches of clouds, light gray ripples standing out against the black sky from the glow of the moon. Steve isn’t completely sure how he got here, only that he started walking and didn’t really… stop.

Wayne’s truck is gone, leaving only Eddie’s cream-colored van among the gravel and grass. Which means Eddie is home and, judging by the light in the window, awake. Steve has a fleeting thought that he should turn around, walk back home, and try to forget he ever came here. Try to forget that he didn’t mean to, that his head and his heart are traitorous beings that have conspired against him to bring his body to the one place— one person— where he isn’t welcome. He tries to move, to will his legs and his feet to catch up with his brain and the urge to run. But they don’t. They stay frozen to the ground, rooted in place as if they belong here. As if he belongs here.

A voice cuts his thoughts off, one that he could pick out in a crowd full of people. His eyes snap to the front door of the trailer, now open and spilling warm light onto the wooden steps that lead down to the gravel drive. A figure grows near, tall and lanky and Steve feels like he’s trapped. His thoughts get louder, yelling and screaming at him to run run ruN RUN RUN-

Hands on his shoulders. Eddie’s face in front of him.

Eddie looks panicked, his dark eyes wide and dancing around as if searching Steve's face for… something. He must not find it, because the two little lines between his brows appear and his mouth starts moving. It’s all muffled, like he’s trying to talk through glass. Steve blinks.

“-ington? Steve,” Eddie’s pleading voice finds his ears as he shakes his shoulders, the fog in his head dissipating as the strained way his name falls from his lips. Steve hums. He blinks again.

“Oh,” he breathes out, voice barely louder than a whisper. Eddie is here. He’s in front of him. He can see him. He’s here and he can see and Steve shouldn’t be here he needs to go-

“Stevie, are you okay?” The fear in Eddie’s voice cuts off his train of thought— something that seems to happen a lot nowadays— and Steve feels every sensation return to his body. The heavy hands on his shoulders, soft and warm and missing their signature rings. The distant chill of the night air on his exposed bits of skin seeping away at the small amount of space between them. The faint puff of air on his face from the man before him. The fact that all of those things are from Eddie.

Steve clears his throat, swallows. Tries to focus his eyes on Eddie’s face.

“I’m fine, Eddie. I um.. sorry,” he trails off. He tries to smile, at least give something to reassure him, to keep him from asking questions. Steve doesn’t think he could answer them.

To his surprise, Eddie lets out a breath of relief, the fear dissipating from his eyes as they clench shut and his head drops. His shoulders move with his lungs as he takes a breath before looking back up at him.

“Jesus H. Christ, you scared the shit outta me, Steve. Thought…” he trails off. His voice wavers. “Thought you were gone. Like… like her.”

Oh. Chrissy. Fuck.

“Shit- sorry, Eds, I didn’t even realize- fuck, I’m so sorry,” Steve pleads. He takes in his surroundings, realizes he’s been standing out here, alone, for who knows how long. He needs to leave. “I-I should go.”

Eddie’s brows furrow, and he tilts his head. “You don’t have to leave, Stevie, it’s fi-“ he cuts himself off.

Steve looks up at that, unsure of when he stopped looking at Eddie, and takes in his pinched expression. The one that’s trained to the ground. The one that’s trained towards-

“What the fuck is this?”

Shit.

“I-it’s not what it looks like, I swear!” He begs, voice sounding unfamiliar even to his own ears. It’s raspy and breaks after a few words. When was the last time he really spoke to anyone today?

“I don’t wanna hurt you, Eds, I really don’t- please, believe me,” he pleads. “It’s just for protection! I don’t-“

“Why are you covered in mud, Steve?” Eddie cuts him off, voice strange and cautious and his hands tighten their grip on his shoulders. Steve knows he doesn’t look the best, knows that his clothes are dirty, but he looks down at himself anyway. His eyes focus on a leaf stuck to his shoelace. He shrugs.

Eddie moves in front of him, a quick thing that Steve suspects is him shaking his head. He mumbles something he can’t hear, voice only a rumble in his throat but Steve knows enough to know that people only talk under their breath when they’re mad. When he’s done something wrong.

He pulls away. Eddie’s hands drop off his shoulders.

“I-I should go. Sorry for bothering you, an-… and keeping you awake,” Steve stutters out, clearing his throat when his voice breaks. He chances a look at him, finding concern written on Eddie’s face. It softens when they make eye contact, and Eddie shakes his head.

“I wasn’t asleep, Stevie. Don’t really, uh.. sleep much, these days. I usually just wait around for Wayne to get home to catch a couple hours. Doesn’t feel safe here by myself, you know?” Eddie confesses, mouth turned upwards in a small, sardonic smile. Steve nods. He does know, he’s never felt safe in his home. With or without people. He’s been going through it for years, long before the events of ‘83. He doesn’t say any of that though, doesn’t think he has the right to.

Eddie steps towards him, closing the bit of distance Steve made between the two, and rests his hand on the arm holding the bat.

“Come inside, Steve,” Eddie requests, voice low and soft. Eddie’s smiling at him. It’s that soft, small, Eddie smile. One that Steve has only seen a handful of times. It’s asking him to say yes, and Steve… he’s weak. So, so weak.

“Okay.”

Eddie’s smile grows.

His hand wraps further around his arm, tugging him towards the open trailer door and Steve feels betrayed that now is when his feet decide to move. He follows Eddie, watching the way he’s glancing at him the entire time. Eddie pauses at the doorway.

“Steve,” he whispers, and Steve looks at him. His hand travels down his arm, causing goosebumps in its wake despite the layer of fabric between their skin. It pauses over the hand still gripping the bat, thumb brushing along his knuckles. “Let it go.”

Steve looks at him, searches those dark brown eyes for fear or hate or anger but finds none. He only finds care. Concern. Love.

It’s terrifying.

He loosens his grip and Eddie takes it from him, the comforting weight of the bat replaced with the warmth of Eddie’s hand. He props it just inside the door to the trailer and leads him over the threshold by the grip on his hand. He’s led over to the couch where a hand on his back urges him to sit down. Steve does, and instantly sinks into the well-worn cushions.

“I’ll be right back, okay? Just gonna get you some water,” Eddie informs him, squeezing his hand briefly before releasing his grip and turning the corner to venture into the kitchen. Steve watches him go, the way the baggy and worn band shirt hangs off his frame. The way his sweatpants are bunched up at the ankle as if they’re too big for him. The way his hair is pulled into a messy bun at the back of his head that swings a little when he walks away. Even now, he’s beautiful.

Shit. He’s so gone for this man.

Eddie returns with a glass of water and flops down on the couch beside him, pressing the cool surface of the cup into his palm. He takes it with a shaky hand, his other joining it to help stabilize the glass. It doesn’t work.

He takes a small sip of water, the liquid feeling like heaven against his dry throat. They sit in silence until Steve finishes half the glass. Then, Eddie speaks.

“Why were you outside at two in the morning, Stevie?” His voice is gentle, and it makes Steve want to cry. He swallows.

“I- I don’t know,” he deflects, lies. Anything to not talk about it.

The harsh sound of a mock game show buzzer startles him, and he turns to find Eddie with his hands cupped around his mouth. Steve grins and lets his head drop, and Eddie nudges his shoulder. He takes a deep breath, focusing on the surface of the water in his hands.

“I have to keep them safe, Eddie,” he confesses. Eddie stays silent, hand gently rubbing his forearm. “It’s what I need to do. What I have to do.”

Silence stretches between them, then, “who, Steve? Who do you have to keep safe?”

‘You,’ he wants to say. ‘You almost died. It’s never been that close before, not in the four years this shit has been going on. You and Max almost died, and I wasn’t there to protect you. I wasn’t with you and Dustin to keep you both safe, to help fight off the bats and urge you through the gate. I wasn’t with Max and Lucas and Erica, wasn’t there to fight off Carver and save Max just a little bit earlier. I wasn’t there, but I should have been. Carver should have beat me to pieces, not Lucas. It should have been me the bats got to, not you. It should have been me, it should have been me, it should have been me.’

Hands fall over his as Eddie takes the glass from him. He didn’t realize his hands were shaking that bad in his revere, causing the water to spill over the sides and onto the brown carpet below them. The glass thunks on the coffee table before Eddie rests his hands over Steve’s, stills their shaking.

“Hey, talk to me, Stevie,” he practically begs. “What’s going on in that head of yours?”

Steve looks at him, sees the worry in his eyes, and wets his lips with his tongue. Doesn’t miss the way Eddie’s eyes flicker down at the movement. He clenches his fists.

“Please don’t tell Robin,” he pleads. If she found out about this, if she knew, he wouldn’t be allowed outside alone ever again. She would worry about him, keep him under lock and key to make sure he wouldn’t do anything stupid. She would stay with him during the night, insert herself firmly by his side until she was sure he was okay. She would make him sleep in his own bed, trapped between his own walls. Trapped in his own house. He can’t stand that place, can’t handle the echoey walls and empty rooms. Can’t stand not being able to do anything for anyone. Can’t stand to be useless.

He’s just wasting time right now. He shouldn’t be here, talking to Eddie, when he could be checking the gates. He should be out there trying to save people, not himself. He should be trying to save his family. He could already be too late. It might have already come back while he was distracted and they could all be gone. It could have been waiting until he was occupied, waiting for an opening to strike. They could be in danger right now. They could be dead.

“Alright, I can do that. I won’t tell her but… Steve, why-“ Steve cuts him off by standing up on shaky legs, hands clenching and unclenching at his sides. “Steve?”

“I need to go, Eddie, I need to- they could- I need to go,” the words tumble out of his mouth, words he isn’t quite sure even make sense but he doesn’t care. He just needs to get out.

Steve walks over to the door, eyes locking on the bat propped there, before he hears Eddie stand up behind him. He turns to find Eddie holding his hands out in front of him like he’s trying to placate a wild animal and, at this moment, he kinda feels like one. His heart is beating too fast and he can feel his breathing quicken. His throat closes up as panic claws its way upwards and clouds his vision, muffling his hearing. Eddie’s mouth moves but Steve can’t hear it through the cotton in his ears. He backs towards the door, hating the fear in Eddie’s eyes as he does so.

His back hits the wall next to the door and he turns, hand finding the rough wood of the bat almost instantly, before he runs out the door. The small “sorry” he lets out is an afterthought, thrown over his shoulder right before the trailer door slams shut behind him and his feet crunch on gravel as he runs towards town.

His blind panic takes him to Dustin’s house first, finding all the lights turned off save for the faint glow of the hall night light through sheer curtains. He stays there for a minute or two, waiting for the sign of flickering lights. Nothing comes.

A couple streets over, he stops in front of Lucas’s house, finds the same thing. Dark. He stands there and waits. No flickering. He runs.

The Wheelers. Dark. He waits, no flickering. He runs.

The Byers-Hoppers. Dark. Waits. No flickering. Runs.

Max. Dark. Waits. Dark. Runs.

Robin. Dark. Waits. Dark. Runs.

His house. Light.

They’re safe. He collapses.

He sits heavily on the front stoop, bat falling to the ground and knocking against the concrete with a thud. His knees come up to his chest and his arms wrap tightly around them as he rasps for breath, the air coming in short, quick bursts. His fingers dig into the soft flesh of his calves, hard enough to leave bruises. His forehead rests heavily on his knees and his eyes sting, welling with tears as the fear slowly fades away.

He sits outside, struggling for breath until the sun begins to rise, and waits. When the sun finds its way over the trees, he makes his way inside to get ready for his opening shift.

The bat finds a new home in his trunk.

Taglist: @tea-beloved @starry-eyedlune @hyperfixationgoddess @zerokrox-blog @nicovania @invisibleflame812 @chaoticvictorianspirit @justforthedead89 @dacremontgomeryay @vhelt @adhdsummer @nerd-and-nervous @i-have-three-feelings @mimicori @remuslupinisthevoiceofgod @solliesolesito @romanticdestruction @vanillatwist @bowl-o-queerios @grimmfitzz

(If you want to be added or removed please let me know!)

#steddie #stranger things #pre steddie #eddie munson #steve harrington #stranger things fillet #stranger things drabble #stranger things fanfiction #stranger things fic #things get better for Steve i promise #hes just having his angsty time right now #robins part is next tho so stay tuned for that #disposable heroes

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theorphicangel · 4 months

Text

#1 “you can stay as long as you want.” | miguel x reader

the boyfriend series with miguel o’hara. | series of fluff, angst and smut with bf! miguel.

cw: none, fluffy.

“I still don’t understand how, for the entire movie, he doesn’t catch on that she’s the killer?”

“I know right, it’s stupid.” Miguel hums a a re-run of a classic slasher movie played on the television in front of you.

It was a late Friday night, the both of you were too exhausted from the past week of work to head out for a proper date. So instead you and Miguel settled for a movie marathon at his apartment.

Empty boxes of your favorite takeaway lay disheveled on his coffee table in front of the couch, your stomach fully satisfied with the meal. It doesn’t take much to get your dopamine running, you think. Him and food was all you needed to get yourself happy.

“I think if this shit played out in real life, me and you would have caught onto her in no time.” You note, as the killer on the screen preys onto their next victim.

“Oh, one hundred percent, we’re a dream team.” Miguel stretches out his exhausted limbs, a silent yawn following from his mouth. And as he does so, an arm magically ends up around your shoulder, pulling you in closer to his body.

“Wow. Smooth O’hara, real smooth.”

He smirks. “I try my best, mi amor.”

The two of you fall into a comfortable silence as the movie plays on. Having watched the movie before, you know what’s to come as the rest of the film comes as a total cliche. You can’t help but let your mind wander. Simultaneously, your hands become restless, fingertips fiddling with each other.

“I should head home soon.” You announce, keeping your eyes on the screen ahead.

Miguel hums, his fingertips tracing circles on your arms ever so gently.

You should head home but you don’t really want to. The thought of getting up from this couch is a headache in itself and the thought of driving home at the hour with traffic and dealing with god-awful drivers makes you want to bury yourself into the earth. You really don’t want to head home, but you probably should.

Through the shadow of your expression, Miguel can read the exhaustion on your face. As well as you, he really doesn’t want you to leave. Not when the two of you are so comfortable like this.

“Hey.” Miguel whispers, causing you to turn your head to look at him. “You can stay as long as you want.” He says. “You know that right?”

Your heart swells immediately at his words, a spark of love set off in your body like a sudden firework.

“I know.” You smile before continuing. “But I probably shouldn’t, I have tons of work to catch up and briefs and—”

“But I want you to.”

Miguel doesn’t mean interrupt your work ethic but for the past week he’s been yearning to see you. It’s hard enough that you both have busy lifestyles, meaning that finding time to see each other is rare. Not to mention how far you live away from him. It’s moments like this, when you have to leave, that Miguel just wants to be totally selfish.

So that’s what he’s doing. Being selfish for once.

“If you’re sure.” you confirm.

“I’m always sure.”

You snort to yourself at his comment. “Then why’d you take fifteen minutes deciding what to order earlier?” You nudge your elbow into his side gently, teasing him further.

Miguel rolls his eyes, now more at ease to wrap his large arms around you. “You’re a little alborotadora, aren’t you?” [troublemaker]

“Maybe.” You respond with a playful tone, adding a kiss on his cheek. Your hand moves up to cup his cheek. The action is soft and tender, as if he were the most delicate thing in the world. And you knew he was, especially when he let you into the most intricate parts of his soul. Something that he rarely gave people permission to do.

“Okay,” you murmur. “I’ll stay.”

reblogs are much appreciated! thank you for reading and thank you for being here!

#angel writes #miguel o hara x reader #bf!miguel #atsv miguel #atsv headcanons #spiderman atsv #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel spiderverse #miguel x reader #spiderman astv #spiderman 2099 x you #miguel o’hara fluff #miguel o'hara fanfiction #miguel o’hara drabbles

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ot8archivesblog · 3 months

Text

Party

꒰ ͜͡➸ Pairing: Minho x Female Reader

꒰ ͜͡➸ Genre: College AU, Smut

꒰ ͜͡➸ Warnings: (Obviously) NSFW content, alcohol, mentions of drugs, cigarettes, smoking, drinking, explicit content, overstimulation, fingering, pet names, praise (like good girl)

꒰ ͜͡➸ w/c: 3,5k

꒰ ͜͡➸Masterlist

So I read this request a day ago and thought of it as really interesting because I'm currently writing a story which is similar to that, so I wanted to give this specific scenario a go.

You haven't mentioned which Gender the Reader should have, so because of the roommate being female (and as far as I know there are no mixed rooms) I will assume that the Reader is female as well.

This is actually my first attempt to write NSFW so I hope it'll be good and let me know how you think of it.

Have fun <3

(Not proof read because it's 1 am and I was too lazy so please excuse any mistakes <3)

Request by @the-unknown-daisy

Your bag hit the ground the moment you finally closed the door to your dorm room.

Your best friend was currently sitting on her bed, painting her nails, while you let yourself fall onto your bed.

"Everything okay?" She turned her head to you for a second, taking in the little ball you had curled into, before she went back to concentrating on the task ahead.

She knew you had been like this for a few weeks now and she didn't know what was bothering you.

You normally always talked with her about stuff like that, but this time you decided against it. Exam stress was getting to you and you felt as if you weren't doing enough, but it felt stupid to voice it like that.

You knew she would understand and support you, but you still didn't confide in her.

She had been so happy these past few weeks, always meeting up with Changbin and spending time with him, that you didn't want to spoil her mood with yours.

Changbin is a really nice guy and he was making her so happy, sometimes you envied her.

Of course you wished them nothing but happiness, but it often happened, that when you saw them interact, you wished to be able to have someone like that in your life too.

You weren't lucky with boys though. All your relationships had ended on a bad note and you were just annoyed by it at this point.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Are you getting ready for something?" Stupid question. It's Friday. There would obviously be a campus party somewhere.

Students could barely contain their desire to drink and party all week, of course no one would miss the weekend parties.

Normally you would go as well, not as often as your best friend, but also quite often. However you didn't really feel like it the past few weeks and you didn't want to drag anyone down with you.

"Yep, the party is at Changbin's dorm this time. I would have either spend the night with him or at a party anyway so it's pretty convenient." Your best friend answered, while she finally closed the bottle of nail polish.

"You're coming with me, by the way." She nonchalantly added, as she blew on her nails.

"Wait, what? When did I say yes to this plan of yours?" You tilted your head, confusion taking over your features.

Had you promised to go?

"Well you didn't. But I told Changbin I would bring you along. You've been quite down these past few weeks and I wanna cheer you up." She got up from her bed and went over to yours, sitting down next to you.

"Plus you know Changbin's roommate?" Of course you did. Who didn't know him.

"You mean Lee Minho?" Her face lit up at that.

"Exactly! Isn't that enough reason to come? He'll be hanging out with Changbin, I'll be hanging out with Changbin and you'll be hanging out with me." She beamed at you and you could only sigh.

Of course, like everyone, you thought that Minho was very attractive. Hell, their entire group of friends was. But you still felt rather down and meeting someone like him in this condition, wasn't going to get you any plus points with him.

You turned to your friend to tell her that you didn't want to come, when you noticed her smiling down at her phone.

"I'm Telling Changbin you're coming! He missed having you around too." At that point you couldn't say no any longer.

She was being so happy over the fact that you could spend the night together, that you didn't want to let her down again.

"Fine, I'll come."

The last few hours had been spend with getting ready and by now, you were already tired.

You didn't know how you'd get through the night, but your best friend was convinced that if you looked hot, you would certainly feel hot and she wasn't wrong.

You did actually feel better, if you didn't think about the tiredness seeping into your bones. An energy drink would fix that.

Your best friend was wearing a pretty white top, that stopped right above her belly-button and a short pinks skirt with high heels.

Her makeup was close to that, but not too much pink.

While you were wearing tight black jeans and a black top that had only one sleeve and also stopped right above your belly-button. However it was also V-formed, showing more of your cleavage than your besties top did.

The dorm wasn't too far so you made your way over there, slowly strolling through the night, which was immediately illuminated by the party lights.

The music was already at full power and you could nearly hear it on the entire campus.

Professors thankfully never minded, so they could keep doing their little parties.

You followed your friend, never letting go of her hand as she lead you inside the dorm, finally meeting up with Changbin.

"Hey baby, you're here." He pulled her closer by her waist and planted a soft kiss onto her lips, which probably would have turned more passionate if you hadn't been standing next to them.

"Hey there little one, I missed you." The taller male greeted you by ruffling your hair up.

"Missed you too." You replied while your eyes scanned the room.

It was already extremely full and it was only 11 pm. You didn't want to know how full it could get.

You had been to quite a few parties but you were always amazed how many people actually fit into these dorms.

They weren't small but they weren't exactly big either.

Changbin had been playing beer pong with some guys until we had interrupted him. So he resumed in doing so, while one of his arms was securely wrapped around your friends waist.

"Binnie." Your best friend whined and he chuckled.

"Sorry guys, finish without me." He turned to her and kissed her, before leading you two away.

"Minho just wrote me telling me he's on his way back with Chan." Changbin commented as he made his way through the crowd and into the kitchen, offering us something to drink.

"Where did they go?"

"They went to get the others. Jeongin was at his parents for a few hours and Chan and Minho went to get him." The older answered, while giving us two glasses.

Not even seconds after he had given them to us, the crowd outside got louder.

"Seems like they're back." Changbin chuckled and went to meet up with them. We followed him closely.

"Hey, look who is finally out of her prison." Chan joked as he side-hugged you.

You had become friends with most of them after your best friend started dating Changbin so this was pretty normal behaviour.

"Sorry, sorry, didn't know I was missed so much." You chuckled as you leaned into Chan's side, when your eyes found Minho's.

You never knew what he was thinking. Could never figure him out. He was a mystery to you and many others.

Chan left first, going to greet some friends while Changbin, Minho, your friend and you made your way to the terrace to get some air.

A lot of people were out here as well but you all sat down on the couch.

"Let's play a game." Someone suggested and everyone agreed on truth or dare. The typical party game that everyone loved to participate in when their brains were non-functional.

You were sipping on your drink while the game commenced.

Till now you had been playing it safe, mostly taking truth, as you knew not many would pick up on it due to being drunk. However someone did pick up on it.

"Three time in a row. You have to pick dare." Minho said as he leaned back on the couch, his eyes fixed on you.

It had been Changbin who had spun the bottle, so why was he interfering?

You said but complied, picking dare this time, which made Changbin grin.

"Kiss Minho."

You were left speechless for a moment. Of course you knew how the game worked, but you hadn't expected this from Changbin. He always went easy on you, which is why you hadn't really been worried when the bottle picked you.

"What, never kissed anyone? I won't bite unless you want me to." Minho commented, a smirk finding its way onto his lips.

You got up from your place, walking over to Minho.

People were sitting next to him so you couldn't do so to kiss him. While you were still contemplating what to do, his hand found your waist and pulled you onto his lap.

"Not so shy." How could you not be, when you were about to kiss the Lee Minho?

Your thighs were on either side of him, as his hands still kept a steady grip on your waist. You leaned in closer, stopping right before your lips could touch his.

At this point both of your eyes were fixed on the others lips and you could feel his smirk on yours.

"What are you waiting for, Princess?"

That's all it took for you to connect your lips.

The kiss was slow at first. Your lips still finding the perfect rhythm to move against each other. However, it didn't take long before the kiss got more heated. He bit your lower lip, asking for entrance which you immediately complied with.

His tongue found its way into your space, exploring your mouth while you tilted your head to deepen the kiss.

It didn't take long for his tongue to find yours, his hands moving up and down your waist at this point while you could feel that you were sitting atop his member, as he got hard.

Your hands found their way into his hair, holding onto him as you moved your hips for a second, making him bite your tongue at the movement which made you gasp in return.

You both parted from each other, a delicate string of saliva still connecting your lips to each other, as you tried to breathe in as much air as possible. This being the only reason you parted in the first place.

The game had commenced while you two had been shamelessly making out and you finally realised that you two weren't alone.

You immediately got off his lap and went back to your place, however your lips were still burning with the feeling of his on them.

The game got boring soon and most disappeared back inside, including Changbin and your friend, while you were now sitting next to Minho, still outside.

He was smoking a cigarette right now, accompanying it with a glass of vodka.

You never really smiled but at this point and the level of drunk you currently were at, you were curious.

"Let me try."

Minho turned his eyes to you, the cigarette still on his lips. He seemed to contemplate it for a moment, until a smirk formed on his lips.

"Sure, but allow me to try something." You didn't really mind. He is Changbin's friend so you trusted him as well.

He took a deep drag of his cigarette, before his long fingers found their way onto your chin, pulling you closer without a word. They put slight pressure on your chin, which made you part your lips and you immediately understood, parting them a little more.

He came closer to you, your nose nearly touching his as he leaned his head to the side, to blow the smoke inside of your mouth. You inhaled, but he didn't give you a lot of time to think as his lips smashed onto your again.

The smoke not being the only thing that went into your mouth as his tongue followed suit. You held onto his shirt, returning the kiss while his hands found their way to your ass, squeezing them for a second before he lifted you onto his lap by your waist.

You immediately adjusted to the situation, sitting up slightly. Your hands finding his neck as you returned the kiss. Your tongue finding his, the fight for dominance not taking long as Minho immediately won it.

You both parted again, out of breathe. It was way too hot between you two. And you both wanted nothing more than to taste the other.

Without a word he picked you up, your legs wrapping around his torso as he carried you to his room.

His room was a no-go zone at parties like these. Everyone knew that. The moment he entered you noticed that the room was empty. He closed the door behind you two, locking it before he resumed his way to his bed, letting you fall on it.

Minho didn't wait for another second, his lips were on your neck this time, as his hands found your waist again. His lips were leaving butterfly kisses all over your neck before he finally found a spot he was satisfied with.

His lips latched onto the soft skin and he sucked on it. Gaining a sweet moan from your lips. He grinned, finally letting go of the skin, admiring the dark hickey that was forming.

"You're okay with this, right?" He asked, just to be completely sure, before you two went any further.

Your nod was more than clear, however that wasn't enough for Minho.

"I need your words, Princess." Those words went straight to your core and it needed a lot of self-control to not cum untouched.

"Yes, please." You didn't need to tell him twice. He removed your shirt from you, his hands immediately unclasping your bra as well as his lips found their way onto your chest.

Soft butterfly kisses littered it at first, before his mouth found one of your nipples catching them between his teeth. At first he softly licked it, watching goosebumps erupt all over your skin before he softly bit it, again pulling a moan out of your throat.

Your sweet sounds were going straight to his member but he tried to control his desires, wanting to prep you enough for him.

You could feel yourself getting wet and it only got worse the more he continued. You needed to feel him inside of you, but you could barely form thoughts, let alone words. Everything felt so good for your touch starved body. And it didn't help that Minho was so perfect at everything he did.

He stopped torturing your breasts, continuing his journey down, a soft kiss on your belly-button and you felt his teeth on the hem of your pants. His hands skilfully opened them before he pulled them down and threw them away.

Just as he had done with your shirt and bra.

"Already so wet for me. What a good little, Kitten." A whimper escaped your lips the moment you felt his hand on your inner thigh, moving closer to your heated core.

"Minho." You managed to moan but the boy only smirked as he moved your drenched panties aside to let one finger graze your folds. He was only rubbing them slowly, but this was enough for you to arch your back already. His fingers felt so good, you could barely wait for them to finally enter you.

"You want me so bad?" He looked up at you as you nodded as much as you could. "I will need your words, Princess."

"Yes, please Minho-..." A moan escaped your lips as his finger entered you. Your hands found the blanket behind you, as you had nothing else to hold onto.

He moved his finger slowly at first but the moment he felt you losing your mind his pace picked up, hitting all the right places.

You were so close to your release when you felt a second finger entering you. You pushed your head into the mattress, trying to ground your thoughts but everything felt so hot. You could barely wait any longer.

"I'm so close." You whined which only made him pick up his pace.

"The cum for me, Princess." Seconds passed after his sentence before your orgasm came crashing down on you. He helped you ride it out until he pulled out his fingers, licking them clean.

"you taste so good." He chuckled.

"You made such a mess, only because of my fingers?" You blushed. "Let's see what a mess you'll make for more." He knew he prepped her enough so he finally got rid of his clothes as well, letting his member finally out of its confinement and you understood why he had to prep you so good.

His member was a sight to behold and you could feel yourself getting wet again only at the sight of it.

He got on top of you, pulling a condom out of his drawer before you stopped him.

"It's fine, I'm on birth control." You needed to feel him inside of you, without a condom.

"Are you sure?" He asked, wanting to be completely sure that you were okay with this.

"Yes."

He threw the pack of condoms away, not wanting to waste another second on them before he connected his lips with yours again.

The kiss was as messy as the first ones but this time you could feel him positioning himself at your entrance.

He broke the kiss, his eyes finding yours. Analysing if there was any doubt before he pushed the tip in slowly.

Your warm walls immediately welcoming him.

"Fuck, you're so tight." He moaned as he slowly kept pushing his member deeper. You were holding onto him, your nails surely leaving marks on his back as your back softly arched. You needed him inside of you, all of him.

He finally bottomed in, giving you a moment to adjust to his size before he pulled out nearly completely only to push it inside a little more forcefully this time.

His groan and your moan mixed as he kept a fixed pace. Your back arched as his member hit your sweet spot every time he pushed it back inside of you. His hands holding your hips so that he could burry himself as deep as possible.

You felt so good around him, your pussy clenching around him as you felt yourself getting closer.

One of his hands moved to your clit, softly rubbing it as he thrust into you, making you scream his name out in pleasure.

You were happy it was so nosy outside, or everyone would have probably heard you two. It was impossible to contain your moans.

"I'm close." He notified, hid hold on your waist tightening.

"Please come inside." You moaned, wanting to feel the warmth of his cum inside of you, to fill you up with it.

"You you want me to fill you up with my cum?" You didn't have to look at him to see the grin.

"Such a needy, whiny brat. If I had known this we would have done this earlier. So good for me. You better take it all. Every drop." He chuckled as his thrusts got sloppier and harder.

You were close, your pussy clenching around his member which made him groan.

"Clenching so good around me, such a good girl."

This only threw you over the edge, your pussy clenching around him as you arched your back, your orgasm hitting you like a truck for the second time.

He helped you ride it out, his thrusts not faltering as his pace only picked up, indicating that he was getting closer to his release.

You felt overstimulated, your pussy was burning as you tried to match him but there was no need, as he came only a few moments after you had.

His hot cum filling your walls as he held your hips still to push his member as deep inside of you as he could.

His back was arched as he threw his head back, your pussy so tight around him that it felt as if it was squeezing every drop out of his members.

"So greedy." He chuckled as he pulled out, admiring the mess you two had made.

"I told you to take it all, Princess."

He teased as he noticed some of his cum sliding out of your hole, only to push int inside with his finger again, making you moan in the process.

Your clit was extremely sensitive and every touch felt burning hot.

"Min, mhh." His eyes focused back on your fucked out state and he grinned, pulling his finger out of you and in front of your lips.

"Taste our mess." You immediately parted your lips taking his fingers into your mouth and licking them clean.

"What an obedient Kitten."

You were exhausted at this point, hoping that he wouldn't make you leave now, but it seemed as if he had no intention to do so.

He pulled you closer to him, covering you both with a blanket.

"Rest for now, let's clean this mess up later." A soft kiss was placed onto the back of your neck as you back was pressed to his chest, his hands secured around your torso.

It didn't take long for your eyes to shut and for you to fall asleep next to him.

No one had ever made you feel as good as Minho had, and you were certainly hoping this wasn't the first and last time you did this.

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doki-doki-imagines · 4 months

Note

Hello :3 I have an idea for a request.

Mk1 boys (Bi-Han, Kuai liang,tomas, liu kang, kung lao, Raiden, johnny, kenshi, syzoth and shang tsung) with wife pregnant reader (Any month, depending on what you want) wake up in the middle of the night craving something and scared to wake them up Because they are already tired and streets from their work and she start sobbing silently and the boys will wake up , what their reaction will be what will they do?

And what will they do when the reader says something like 'I'm fat I look big'

I know it's random and stupid But I read it from a manhwa and I really liked the idea

Soooo please 🥺🥺🥺

author note: the please with teary eyes got me. Also pregnancy cravings are "only" in the first three months, so reader is in that stage.

Bi-Han:

-He is a light sleeper so he heard your first sigh clearly.

-Bi-Han already doesn’t sleep much so go straight to the point or he’ll just go back to sleep (probably in another room).

-You do, and now he is in the kitchen in the middle of the night preparing milk and cereals.

-“Here you go.” He sits in front of you, eating his own bowl.

“Mh, Bi-han?”

“Could you put ice cubes in my milk?”

-He looks at you like you just said some crazy stuff, but he knows better and just does as you asked him. A happy smile now on your face pulling the corner of his lips upward.

-But then, while you are both enjoying your bowls in silence Bi-Han hears you sniffing again, fat tears rolling down your face.

“Now you’ll leave me because I’m fat and have terrible taste in food.”

-His spoon hangs in the air, mouth still open, hair resembling a bird nest. Bi-Han faces drip with annoyance.

-Then he pushes your spoon in your mouth, icy milk and cereals hitting your tastebuds.

“If you have to open your mouth do it to eat and not to say dumb shit. Now go back to eat, I’d never thought icy milk could taste this good…” He replies, pinching your cheek after you gulped down.

Kuai Liang:

-When he comes home and hears you cry, Liang runs to you worried for both you and the baby.

-“What happened fireball?”

“You were out working and-“

“And??”

“And I’m here crying like a whale because I want some marinated and grilled squid.” You let out in a single breath, before going back to sighing and crying.

-The breath of relief Liang let out moved continents.

-Liang isn’t a great cook, but he knows his way around the grill, so his chefs are lucky that Liang didn’t have to wake them up in the middle of the night.

-He looks at you eating with joy, his face laying on his fist, raising the apple of his cheek up.

-But then you get teary…what is happening?

-“You’ll leave me, right?” You say after you let out a sob.

“No, why?”

“Look at me eating like a pig! I’ll get fat and we won’t have sex anymore!” Tears roll down your face and Liang really doesn’t know what to say.

-“Even if you get fat I’m sure you’d be pretty cute.”

“Okay, then-“ You stand on your feet, chopsticks thrown at the table while Liang looks at you with the widest eyes ever. “Fuck me now!”

-…Liang? Hello? Are you still there?

-He can’t really understand what is going on, but Liang decides not to rack his brain over it, his warm hands already on your hips.

Tomas Vrbada: -He was already awake when you started crying, so he asks immediately what’s wrong.

-“I don’t want to bother you, you always work so hard but-“

“?”

“I want smoked salmon.”

-Ahhh Tomas' first experience with his partner’s cravings.

-He searches in all the fridges of Shirai Ryu but can’t find anything. Tomas is ready to catch a salmon with his teeth like a bear and smoke it himself to make you happy.

-And that’s exactly what Tomas does.

-The sight of him shirtless, mauling a salmon with the moonlight making the water droplets on his chest and back shine…was a sight that sadly nobody witnessed.

-“Tommy this tastes so good, it is so juicy and…fatty.”

Tomas feels the storm coming.

-“You’ll want me even when I’ll become as fat as a salmon?”

Tomas nods and gulps, knowing full well of the doom incoming.

-“Why are you lying?! Men are all the same!”

-If something, seeing his partner belly round with your offspring can just make Tomas hot under the collar. But it’s not like you’ll listen to him.

-He just waits head in hands for this outburst to calm itself, tiredness knocking you out. Tomas hopes sooner rather than later.

Liu Kang:

-You know what is the best part of defending the hourglass? Looking into it to anticipate his partner’s cravings!

-So you’ll never have to cry because Liu Kang is always ready to give you the craziest food ever.

-“Ohh Liu, you really are the best. Always ready to give me the food I crave…” Bad silence, Liu Kang starts to have goosebumps. “I know the game you are playing, bastard!” You push Liu Kang away from your arms, running away from him.

“What are you talking about, dear one?”

“You want to make me fat so you’ll have me all for yourself! You egoist! You selfish bastard!”

-Yeah, Liu Kang is a bit selfish. Yes, he wants you all for himself kilos more or kilos less. But he has to admit that it wasn’t his plan.

-“You are mistaken, dear.”

“Mh??”

“I always want you all for myself.”

“Ah! Even now!?”

“Absolutely.”

“Then take this-“ You finally run back into his arms, lips smashed against his ones. You try to pull him off, but now there is no way that Liu Kang will let you go.

- It’s time to show you how hot he finds you.

Kung Lao:

-Good luck with him because Lao is a heavy sleeper.

-He’ll notice that there is a problem the next morning when you see your puffy and red eyes.

“I didn’t want to bother you, but I had insane cravings last night.”

“Next time wake me up. I don’t mind.” He says hands on your shoulder before going to work.

-So, when the next night you try to wake him up, the need for cabbage stew is making you insane.

-Keyword: try.

-World could end and Lao would still be snoring.

-Next time is better to have cravings during the day because at night you’re on your own.

-Meanwhile, during the day Lao becomes more or less your butler…at least.

Raiden:

-“Hey sweety, don’t cry. What’s wrong?” Raiden turns around to look at you, index finger stroking your wet cheek.

“You must be so tired.”

“Yeah, a little. But I want to listen to you. What’s wrong?”

“I want to eat dango.”

“At this hour?”

“Please, Raiden.”

-He chuckles but lifts himself from the bed. But now Raiden thinks “Where I can find dango at this hour??”

-Raiden has a guardian angel; Madame Bo, with her insomnia problem for once being useful.

-And the lady will be more than happy helping Raiden's pregnant partner to fulfill one of their cravings.

-Not for free, tho…

-You won’t cry about weight with him. Even if your mind is hazed by hormones it still works well enough to know that he’ll always love you.

Johnny Cage:

-Another heavy sleeper, but if you push him around enough he’ll wake up.

-“Ehi babe, what’s wrong.”

“Johnny-“ He hears you sigh and finally wakes up, worried that you may be hurt.

“I’m in the mood for cream and strawberries, but at first I didn’t want to wake you-“

“Shhh babe-“ He presses his index finger on your lips “I’m here to help you.”

-He comes back soon, a cup filled to the brim that makes your eyes shine with joy.

-“Oh look, you have some cream here.”

His thumb brushes the corner of your lips. Then Johnny wanted to lick it, already smiling at his next action.

-But you move faster, your lips circling his thumb and licking it clean.

-Johnny looks at you, doe eyes looking back, your lips on his thumb, your nice and soft body next to him…

-The cup of strawberries will be soon forgotten.

Kenshi Takahashi:

-He comes back home from a mission and hears you crying. Kenshi is terrorized.

-Kenshi already has anxiety about leaving his partner alone at home, pregnant. Hearing you cry made him crumble.

“Are you fine!?”

“Oh, Kenshi!”

You run to him and hug his middle, he keeps you tight in his arms.

-“Please tell me, what happened!?”

“I’m sorry I don’t want to worry you. It’s nothing serious.”

Kenshi still isn’t calm.

“I just have a crazy craving for takoyaki with honey.”

Okay, his breath is calming down.

-He just returned home, every muscle screaming in pain, but for his partner, he’d do that and much more.

-Thankfully you always liked takoyaki so Kenshi had some ingredients at home, the others got bought in a nearby combini.

“Kenshi you are a real life saver.”

“It’s just my job.” He replies kissing the crown of your head, hands sliding down to massage your tummy.

“But next time just tell me you had a craving, I lost some years of my life.”

-Are those sniffs he is hearing? Oh no…

“I-I’m so sorry Kenshi-“

-He’ll never get used to mood swings.

Syzoth:

-His wife didn’t suffer from cravings, but Syzoth is ready for anything.

-Syzoth more or less always knows when your hormones are gonna hit, so he tries to put limit the incoming “damage”.

-The real problem is that Syzoth doesn’t know anything about human food! You are on your own. Ask your friends, you will have better luck.

-“You search for someone else when I’ll get fat, I know it!”

“You just want to knock me up!”

Syzoth knows your mind isn’t working well, hormones going crazy.

-But he also knows how to calm you down!

“I’d love you even if you became a worm, firefly.”

“The idea of you carrying our baby always fills me with joy.”

-Syzoth will also become more touchy-feely, his hands like to wander…

-Unless you get a crazy mood swing you’ll never doubt his love for you.

Shang Tsung:

-The diva won’t stop being a diva even if now you are pregnant and need his help.

-“Shang Tsung, please can you bring me orange juice.” You sob out, finally giving in into your cravings.

“I also want to conquer the world, but nobody will do it for me.” He replies back, eyes still closed.

-He gives in at the nth sigh. Shang Tsung may not be so unaffected by you.

-He returns soon, a glass filled with orange juice. But he doesn’t sit next to you.

“Anything else before I go back to sleep? You know I don’t like my sleep time being interrupted.”

“No Shang Tung, thank you.”

-He sighs and lies down, you soon follow him.

-“You don’t love me anymore, right?”

A heavy breath leaves his nose.

Damn you.

-“Are you trying to make me laugh? We both know who is the good liar here.”

“That’s why you may not love me. You lied the entire time!”

-Shang Tsung isn’t ready for this conversation.

-His lips end on yours, tongue intruding into your mouth, a moan escapes your throat.

-You may not trust his words, but Shang Tsung hopes he’ll fuck you good enough that his emotions will be understandable through your thick skull.

Bonus:

Tell us about the manwha!

476 notes · View notes

eleganzadellarosa · 7 months

Text

Coparenting

pairing: babydaddy!Jaehyun x fem!reader

genre: angst, fluff, smut (MINORS DNI)

warnings: dom!Jaehyun, slight breeding kink, daddy kink, rough sex, make up sex, hair pulling, spanking, manhandling, fingering, oral (f receiving), dirty talk, pet names (baby, my girl, sunshine, baby mama(he literally calls her this once as a joke), baby girl), slight pussydrunk Jae, mentions of underage drinking

word count: 10,373

AN: I wanted to write something for Jaehyun and this plot came to me so I wrote it out :) enjoy and thanks for reading! <3

You: You really fucked up this time Jae

Jae: I don’t know what to say…

You: Maybe sorry? You never actually say sorry

Jae: I’ll be there for you both, you know that

You: Whatever Jae, you know where to send the money

You kept the last text messages you sent each other to read them whenever you felt yourself falling back into an unrealistic fantasy, just to remind you why you broke up in the first place.

You were young, he was young. 19 to be exact. It was freshman year of college and one thing lead to another and you decided to keep the baby. He wasn’t against it but deep down you both knew you weren’t ready for parenthood quite yet. You had 6 years of dating history with him, having met him in your first year of high school. It wasn’t until you got pregnant that his personality changed and it lead him to do stupid things.

“You’re going to be a dad soon Jae, you can’t just act like that’s not a thing.”

“Who said I wasn’t? I’m literally just trying to live my life as a normal 19 year old! We’re not getting this age back so you can’t be mad!”

He didn’t understand at the time and you haven’t spoken to him since you broke up to know if he’s matured in any way. You loved him and you know he loved you, but there was no way you could handle the stress of him changing so suddenly.

“Come on baby, you have to come put your shoes on now” you called from the kitchen as you packed the small lunchbox into a backpack not much larger.

Being a single mom was difficult but you loved your daughter enough to look past all the hardships. You worked your ass off to make sure she went to a good school to get the best education since you didn’t have the luxury of staying home to teach her yourself.

She runs into the living room across from the kitchen and sits on the floor by the front door to slip on her shoes. You smile to yourself when you see she’s getting the hang of putting them on the correct foot.

You grabbed her backpack and your lunch bag and rushed to put your shoes on as well. You checked her outfit one last time before walking out the door.

It was routine to take her inside and to her classroom, making sure she made it safely and to greet her teacher every morning.

“Hi Mia! Let’s all say good morning to Mia!” the teacher waved both her hands to get the kids’ attention.

“Good morning Mia!” they all shouted in unison and a few of them ran up to hug her.

You stopped her to exchange your goodbye kisses before she ran off with her friends. “Thank you so much, I will be back later to pick her up.” You waved to her teacher as you walked toward the door.

“Of course, you have a great day!”

It was also routine for you to make a quick stop at the local cafe for a hot drink before work, usually choosing anything that goes good with two shots of espresso. When you walked in, a mixture of cinnamon, nutmeg and every other fall scent filled the air, making it clear of the changing seasons.

The man in front of you stood tall and browsed the many options on the overhead menu. “Must be new”you thought. Ever since you moved to this small town, you’ve grown used to seeing familiar faces, so someone not knowing what they wanted from the menu in such a popular cafe was strange.

He was handsome from the back. Dark chocolate locks slightly slicked back minus the few strands that fell to the front and a great sense of style. He wore a simple brown turtleneck under a black jacket with black pants and shoes to match. He looked expensive. You stopped staring at him so intensely when he finally spoke up to order.

“I’ll go with the pumpkin spice latte, and add two shots of espresso please.”

Funny, that’s exactly what you planned on ordering. Great fashion sense and good taste? Now you were curious if his face matched his handsome image from the back. To your dismay, he went straight over to sit at one of the corner tables by the window, back turned toward you.

“Hey, great morning we’re having! What can I get ya?” the cashier at the front greeted you as she always does, seeming to always have a smile on her face.

“Uh, I’ll actually order what he did” you pointed in the dapper man’s direction and she nodded her head as she pressed a few buttons on the screen.

“That’ll be $3.75”

You took your card out of your wallet and tapped it against the card reader. You went to sit at your favorite seat and wait for your order to be called.

“Pumpkin spice latte, two shots of espresso!”

You looked up from your phone and watched the barista push two identical cups forward on the counter in the pickup area. As you approached your drink, you looked over to see the man still sitting in his seat. He must not have heard them call out the order, but taking a quick glance at your watch there was no way you had time to be a good samaritan and make it to work on time.

You picked up your latte and walked toward the door, taking one last look back to see if you would witness him getting his drink before you fully stepped out. Surprisingly, he got up from his seat and turned around to go over and retrieve his order. You felt cold, body frozen with your hand on the “push to open” door. Your hands were trembling, drink barely secure in them. Your heart dropped.

There he was, in the flesh. The father of your child and the man you once called “the love of your life”. You moved to this town to start a new life and get away from having possible run ins with him, but seeing as he was standing in the cafe you visited everyday like clockwork, your plan to stay hidden had been ruined. You quickly turned around before he looked in your direction and pushed the door open.

You stared at the road in a daze, driving with your limbs on autopilot. It’s going on 5 years since you’ve seen him last and could have gone the rest of your life without doing so.

You had to admit, seeing him made you realize how much he blossomed more into an adult in such a short amount of time. You missed him, but had to think of the text messages that still sat in your phone today. You could never let yourself fall down that hole again, especially for your daughter’s sake. You hated Mia not knowing her father, but it was best for now that she didn’t get attached to someone who might not stay.

You parked your car in the lot, hands still gripping the steering wheel, your head falling forward on the horn. It was going to be tough getting through your shift today with the anxiety bubbling up in you. What was he doing here anyways? To you, he had no business in this small town. There was nothing too exciting about the place and it seemed to house mostly people 30 and above.

Whatever he was here for, you hoped it was only for today and you didn’t have to go through seeing him on a regular basis.

4 o’clock came sooner than you expected, probably thanks to how unfocused you were all day. Right now your daughter was the only thing on your mind and you wanted to pick her up quickly so she didn’t wait longer than need be.

“Mommy mommy! Look, I got a sticker!” she runs up to you with her arm extended to show you the sticky image on the back of her hand.

“Wooow baby, it’s so nice! Who gave that to you?”

“Mrs. Burgess! She said I did really good on my writing my name today!”

You smiled and patted her on the head, picking her up and planting a kiss on her cheek.

“Great job my Mia, mommy’s so proud! You have to show mommy how you write your name later okay?”

She nodded and wrapped her arms around your neck as you opened the back passenger door for her to sit in her car seat. After strapping her in, you slid in the front ready to get home and end the day.

“Mommy, next week is parent’s day! Everyone made paper flowers for their mommies and daddies.”

“Ooo a surprise for mommy? I can’t wait to see it!”

“Yes! I made one for daddy too so tell him to come too!”

You froze in your seat, taking a peek at her from the rear view mirror. “Mia…daddy’s not here remember?” you swallowed thickly, hoping that she would skip over her mistake and leave the conversation alone.

“Why can’t daddy come this one time? I want to give daddy his flower.”

You were stumped. As much as you tried to prepare yourself for this day, your mouth was sewn shut. You didn’t want to contact him, you didn’t want to see him, you just didn’t want to get hurt again. You weren’t even sure if he had the same number if you did want to shoot him a text. You were the one to break up with him because of his antics and you were also the reason why he had never come to visit. From changing your number to moving to a whole different city, you tried to erase your identity from his memory.

It wasn’t something you wanted to worry about and you hoped your daughter would simply forget by the time next week came around.

The next morning, you went back to the cafe, heart not racing until you look over at where he sat yesterday. Thankfully no one who matched the description sat there now and you considered yourself off the hook. What were the chances he had actually moved to this city and yesterday was one of many days you’d run into each other?

“Hey Emma, same as yesterday please!” you smiled at your normal cashier and went to go sit in your usual spot after you paid.

“Y/N?” The voice sounded unsure, cautious, in disbelief. When you turned around, his eyes matched the tone of the words that left his mouth. “Oh my god, it really is you! You look…good.”

Your mind was going haywire. Jaehyun was standing merely inches away from you, looking just as good as he did yesterday in much more comfortable attire.

“Hey Jae.” you said weakly, “Yeah, you too.”

“I uh…would have paid for your drink if I knew it was you.” He smiled his signature smile. That damn smile and those stupid dimples. It took everything in you to not slap the look off his face. “C-can you talk? It’s been a while.”

Admittedly you didn’t have to be to work for another hour and a half, so you had time since it was only 30 minutes away and traffic was still good. You were indeed curious what he wanted to talk about but didn’t want it to turn out like it did the many times you played it out in your head. It wouldn’t hurt to try though.

“Uhhhh yeah sure.”

He smiled as if he high-fived himself for getting you to agree and he followed you back to your table after grabbing the drinks.

“How have you been? I hadn’t seen you around and now I know why.”

“I’ve been good, just working. And yeah, I’ve been here. How have you been?” You looked down at your cup and let your thumbs play with the sides.

“I’ve been good too. Working mostly, nothing special.”

You nodded your head and gave him a small smile, having the courage to finally look up at him.

“How’s the little one?” he asked hesitantly but you knew it would come out eventually.

“Mia? She’s good. She’s in kindergarten now.”

His eyes widened and the grip on his cup got a bit tighter. You forgot he didn’t know the name you chose since you moved before you went into labor and never got the chance to discuss any of those things.

“Wow, I see I missed a lot…”

“Yeah Jae, you did.”

“Well if you don’t mind, I can change that. I’m actually in the process of moving here in like 2 weeks. I can take her to school some days and watch her too to take something off your plate.”

Fear welled up in your chest at the mention of him taking her since it felt like he would never bring her back. “I’m actually not comfortable with that at all. I’m not sure she needs someone so unstable this early in her life.”

He raised an eyebrow, “what is that supposed to mean?”

“Well I don’t know Jae, I was alone my entire pregnancy so I’m not sure I can trust you to be there for her.”

He looked down and his jaw shifted, mouth hanging from the scoff he let out. “I know what I did was wrong and I’m very sorry about that, but you moved and changed your number before you even had her so what the hell was I supposed to do?!”

You knew he was right but you hated that he dismissed the reason you left in the first place. This conversation was a bad idea just like you thought it would be and you didn’t want it to last any longer than it needed to. You stared at him with a deadpan expression and stood up from your seat. He grabbed your arm and sat you back down.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for that to come across so harshly. I just wanted to be there for the both of you and that wasn’t the easiest thing. I know I made some mistakes but I would never leave our daughter like that.”

“My daughter and I don’t know if I can trust that Jae. I don’t want to see her sad.”

“I promise you I wouldn’t want to see either of my girls sad. Give me your number, I can text you when I get settled in and we can discuss this some more.”

It felt like the energy in the earth shifted while you handed him your phone. That “my girls” shit you completely ignored and had no time to fall for one of his tricks. Why did it have to come to this, you not trusting anything he says?

When you got in your car and drove off, tears streamed down your face. In some way you felt defeated like he broke through the defenses that you so effortlessly built. It was scary, him reentering your life right after your daughter mentioned the parent event at school.

A week passed and you had forgotten all about parent’s day until the morning of when Mia told you “not to forget to tell daddy to come”. She never worried about this man before or maybe you were so stuck on keeping him away that you didn’t notice how much she wanted him around.

Ding

Jae: Hey, I just wanted to ask if you could send me some pictures of Mia? I don’t want to go crazy and ask for all of them, but I wanna see her from day one.

You stared down at the text and then looked at the date. According to him at the cafe, he should be here next week and you knew he’d want to see her. You also knew that if you told him about Mia’s flower for him, he’d be over asap. Not yet you thought. Him meeting her would have to wait until he got here and until you were ready. For now, pictures would have to suffice.

Jae: She’s so gorgeous 💕

Jae: She looks a lot like you I think but she definitely has my dimples!

The comparison made you sick. You knew it was his kid but you tried not to see his side of it. Fuck, this was gonna end so badly, you could feel it. One more week, one more week before you had to deal with whatever he threw your way and truthfully you weren’t ready to catch it.

It was time to pick up Mia and attend the parent’s day event. You walked inside the classroom and smiled at all the other parents and teachers that you passed by. Seeing all the couples made you realize just how single you were and you lowkey wished Jaehyun was here to make it not feel so awkward.

Mia’s eyes lit up when she saw you and ran over with your flower in one hand and his in the other.

“Did daddy come too?!”

You chuckled awkwardly and shook your head. She looked up at you for a few seconds before bursting out into tears, shocking you and everyone else in the classroom. You quickly picked her up to shush her but her feelings were hurt and you would be trying to comfort her for a while. Your poor baby, you hated doing this to her but she didn’t know how scary the whole situation was.

Maybe it was only scary for you and she would be just fine with everything if he decided to leave again. You missed him. His presence, his laugh…his dick. The relationship was going so strong and one small mistake messed it all up. Boys are so stupid you said to yourself while you rubbed her back and fought the tears building up in your eyes.

He never told you what day exactly he would be here but when the next week hit, your anxiety increased tenfold. He probably felt so good about himself for knowing you anticipated his call, text or even seeing him in the cafe again. You actually hadn’t seen him since the last time and you guessed it was because he had a few more things to sort out before he moved.

Ding

You looked down at your phone when you heard the notification. His name shines brightly on your phone and your palms get sweaty.

Jae: Hey Y/N, I just finished moving all my stuff in. I wanted to take you and Mia out to the park this weekend if you weren’t busy.

There it was. The time you knew was coming but still didn’t fully prepare for. He was once again taking control of the situation and you detest not being able to gain it back.

You: Hey Jae, sure what time and which park did you want to meet at?

He turned his read receipts on for you, so you knew he checked your message almost immediately. He gave you a time and place and said to also let him know if you were down for lunch. You felt the slight warmth in your heart, feeling like you did back when you used to date. This is exactly what you didn’t want to happen. You didn’t want your feelings for him to come back just because he was around again because you knew it would cloud your judgement.

If he messed up again, you would have the pleasure of telling him “I told you so” which gave you something to look forward to. When you got home and told Mia that "daddy wanted to see her", she almost went through the roof with how high she jumped. She even went to school and told all her friends about it. You had never seen her so excited for something and you hoped he didn't let her down.

When the weekend approached, you stood in front of your mirror staring at your outfit for too long. In reality, you weren't really looking at your outfit, you were stuck in another daze not mentally ready for what the day had to bring. You chose something between casual and cute just in case the park got you dirty. An oversized argyle sweater tucked in a pair of light blue jeans. As for your hair, you settled on some loose curls.

"Come on mommy, let's go see daddy!" Mia was already by the door putting on her shoes.

"Are you sure you're ready to see daddy?" you spoke to her as you straightened her clothes and added bows to her two pigtails. If she said no, you would have made up any excuse for her, but seeing how she couldn't sit still while you added her accessories meant that her backing out wasn't an option.

Ding

Jae: I'm omw there now, it's not too far from me so it won't take me long.

You: Okay, we're otw too.

You took your last deep breath before walking out the door. When you stepped out the car with Mia, she immediately ran over to get on the slide. You took a seat on the bench across from her, keeping an eye on her around all the other kids. You watched her aimlessly, thumbs twiddling as you waited.

"Hey."

You turned to see Jaehyun walking up to you with a bag in hand. He was dressed in a plain black tee covered by a burgundy cardigan, black jeans and black sneakers. God he looked so good, why did he have to be so damn fine?

"Oh hey." you smiled and waved lightly.

He sat next to you on the bench, knees touching.

"I brought Mia a gift. I'm not really sure what she likes but she always had a bear with her in her baby pics, figured she'd want an upgrade." He reached into the bag and pulled out a small plush rabbit, something you knew Mia would love. He reached in for something else, and pulled out a small box, handing it over to you. "I got you a little something too."

You raised both your eyebrows in shock and grabbed the box from him. You opened it to see a spa voucher for a full body massage and under it was a small dainty necklace with a single diamond on it. You loved simple jewelry liked this and apparently he remembered.

"Oh that's so thoughtful of you Jae, I really love it. Thank you."

He look relieved that he properly guessed what you'd like as a gift. He opened his mouth to say something but got cut off by Mia.

"Daddy! Hi daddy!" she came running over to you both when she saw him sitting next to you.

Your heads shot in her direction and you looked over at him, the biggest smile spread across his face. He opened his arms and she crashed into the hug as he picked her up and sat her on his lap.

"Hi Mia! I'm so glad to see you, you look so pretty!"

"You look pretty too daddy, I'm so happy you came! Since you didn't come to my school, I'm going to give you your flower now!"

He looked over at you confused and you felt guilty for not telling him about the special day. She reached into her bag that sat next to you and pulled out the paper flower similar to the one she made for you. His face brightened and he leaned over to grab it.

"Wow Mia you did such a great job! Daddy has something for you too!"

Her face lights up and she jumps up and down. "Daddy has a gift for me mommy!" You laugh at her excitement and nod your head. She squealed and spun around with the rabbit he gave her and thanked him multiple times in a short minute. She went over to hug him again and kissed him on the cheek. "Thank you daddy! She's my favorite!"

He laughed and rubbed her head before she sped off, back to whatever kids she made friends with.

"It's kind of unbelievable."

"What?" you didn't know what he meant but patiently waited for his answer.

"I can't believe we have a kid together and she's already this big. 5 years seems like such a long time."

"It is. A very long time actually." You caught a lump in your throat when you were forced back to the reality of the situation. Seeing him and Mia interact so well together makes you wish you could turn back time and start things off on a better foot. Jaehyun was a great guy and you knew that, but you couldn't forgive him for his immaturity back then.

You sat on top of the toilet, hands shaking and eyes watery looking at the positive result on the pregnancy test. You didn't mean for this to happen and didn't think it actually would happen. It's not like you and Jae never fucked raw, but his pullout game was usually top tier. You both got too caught up in the moment and he came in you with no hesitation. You thought everything would be fine since you immediately went to the bathroom, but the double lines staring back at you told you a different story.

You were scared, not because you didn't want a baby with him but that was a plan you made for years down the line. You were both freshmen in college and this would ultimately throw a few wrenches in both your plans. You knew he would be understanding though and that helped ease your mind some.

You: come over after the game, we gotta talk

Jae: 👀 uh oh babe, don't scare me like this. Is it bad?

You: not exactly...

You: just come over when you're done

There was a knock on your dorm door within the next 10 minutes and you know he stopped the game of basketball he was playing with his friends for you. Your feet dragged you to the door and you opened it, Jaehyun out of breath on the other side. His shirt was missing and sweat dripped off his body.

"What's wrong baby? Is everything okay?" he asked walking in and closing the door behind him.

You hated that the moment couldn't be better than you telling him in the living room of your slightly run down dorm. You grabbed the test out the pocket of your red pajama shorts and held it up so he could see it.

"Jae, I'm pregnant."

His eyes grew to the size of tomatoes as everything sank in and he stood there stiff as a board. You were starting to get nervous when he didn't say anything and wasn't really sure how to handle his reaction.

"Jae say something, you're scaring me..."

"I-oh my god...I mean baby I'm so happy but this is just so sudden."

"You came in me last month Jae, there was always a possibility. And you don't really look happy."

"I know baby, I know, I just didn't think it would actually happen." He pulled you into a hug a rubbed your back. "I'm happy for us, I really am and I know you'll be a great mom."

This all came as a shock to you too so his reaction wasn't far fetched. Everything that followed after is what surprised you. He barely ever spent time with you anymore and he was always out sneaking drinks with his friends. Jaehyun was never a fan of alcohol but the news of your pregnancy seemed to unleash a new side of him and you hated it.

One night a friend of his texted you to come get him because he was so drunk and feeling up on every girl at the party. It was disappointing and embarrassing, his behavior was outta control and he never had an explanation for it. You got to the party and saw him hugged up on some random girl who was taking advantage of the attention. You went over and tapped him on the shoulder.

"Ooooooooh, hey babe. I didn't know you were invited." His eyes were droopy and he slurred every word. He grabbed around your waist from the couch he sat on and leaned his head against your stomach.

You pushed his head off and dragged him by the arm, pulling hard as he resisted.

"Get the fuck off me! Why are you trying to ruin this for me?"

The words came out harshly and you couldn't help but think he wasn't talking about the party when he said "ruin". Most people stopped to look at the fight brewing between you and Jae, and you felt the heat rise in your face. Tears threatened to fall when he shoved you away again and walked off, leaving you to stand in the crowd by yourself.

It was that night you made up your mind that he wouldn't be the partner you thought him to be and you had to move on without him. That's the night the messages were exchanged and you changed your number not long after, not waiting to hear whatever shitty excuse he came up with.

As you sat on the bench with him looking at the daughter that formed from you two, you wanted things to be different. You wanted to be able to lock your fingers with his and know that he was going back to a home you shared.

All of it was as true as a pig flying. As if being able to feel the shift in energy from you, Jaehyun looks over and watches how you watch Mia in a daze, eyes showing sadness he’s never witnessed. He wanted to pull you in for a hug, kiss your forehead and rub your back but he knew the reason behind that sadness was him.

He hated what he did to you and how he acted. Everything was just so sudden and truthfully it scared him. The idea of being a dad but the expectation of being a GOOD dad. He was fucking terrified and he made the wrong decision of trying to drink and party his fears away.

Before he could apologize you were already gone. Dropped out as if school no longer mattered, or most importantly, him. He loved you more than words could describe and he messed it all up, possibly never having the chance of getting it back. Not being able to handle the sorrow you tried to conceal, he suggested you all went for lunch since Mia had been playing continuously for the hour you had been here.

“Come on Mia, let’s go eat with…let’s go eat.” you stopped yourself from referring to him as “daddy” simply because you’re not sure how long this relationship would last and it would feel weird calling him that all of a sudden.

Mia runs over and grabs Jaehyun’s hand and looks up at him with a wide smile. He looks down and returns the smile and tightens his grip. He looked good as a dad and it was something you never doubted, just unfortunate circumstances that made you think otherwise.

“You guys can ride with me and I can just bring you back here to your car when we’re done. Is that okay?” He looks at you as he stands at his car, hand resting on the roof of the driver’s side.

Before you could speak, Mia shouted excitedly that she wanted to ride with him so there was no way you could say no especially since you weren’t ready to have him be alone with her.

He smiled and jogged over to the passenger side where you thought he’d be opening the door for Mia but opens your door instead. You turned around to thank him as you got in, but he was already buckling her in the backseat. It felt weird not being the one to drive around wherever you needed to go but it felt nice at the same time. Being a passenger princess eased your mind some and you felt like a chore had been crossed off your list.

“Everyone buckled in?” He hopped into the driver’s seat and looked in the rearview mirror at his daughter before looking at you and you give him a nod.

You kept your eyes on the road as best as you could but they would occasionally slide over and watch him drive. You rolled your eyes for constantly letting his looks distract you. You couldn’t help but notice how much more toned his body seemed under his clothing, and remembering how your nails would dig into his back while he roughly thrusted into you.

Ugh. You clenched your jaw and shooed the image in your head away, sitting in silence for the remainder of the ride. When he pulled into the parking lot, his arm instinctively reached behind your seat to boost him up high so he could see as he parked. You didn’t expect to blush so hard, but having him this close and smelling his cologne had you sidetracked.

“Daddy you’re a good driver, I’m going to drive like daddy when I get big!” Mia exclaims when Jaehyun opens her door and unbuckles her.

He chuckled and smiled as he picked her up, “Thank you baby, daddy will teach you okay?”

He carries her to the door of the restaurant and opens it for you. When you enter, you can feel his eyes watching you. After sitting down and ordering, there was a slight awkward silence besides the few times Mia would think of something she wanted to tell him. You and Jae ordered pasta and Mia wanted a sandwich.

"Daddy can you cut my sandwich please? It's too big." She pouted as she pushed her plate closer to Jaehyun's side of the table.

"Mia, honey you have to do some things yourself…”

He waved his hand dismissing whatever you just said. “No it’s okay, I’ll cut her sandwich for her especially because she asked very politely, good job Mia.” He patted her head and grabbed her plate.

Just watching their interactions showed you just how much Mia is falling in love with being around him and you can’t help but want to cry. You want this relationship between them to work, you don’t want her to feel the sadness you did. A part of you also wants you and Jaehyun to work but you brushed it off as a rekindling feeling because you haven’t been with anyone like this in a long time.

“How’s your food? I saw this place had good reviews so I’m hoping it lives up to the expectations.”

“Oh, it’s actually really good. I’ve never been here before so it felt nice to try somewhere new.”

“Oh really? How come you’ve never come here?” He leaned forward, chin resting in the palm of his hand, attentive and ready to listen.

You stared at him for a second. Gosh he’s so gorgeous, you see why you started dating him in the first place. But it was this moment now, the way all his attention was focused on you that made your heart flutter and you suddenly felt 19 again. He had always been so good with listening to whatever problems you had and never made you feel like you couldn’t talk to him. You missed that and with the lack of friends in the past few years, it felt good to have an adult to hang out with.

Being a single mother made you have to put in the extra work so you never stopped to make friends. It was your fault but it didn’t help knowing that you were only overworking yourself to keep your mind off of him. You wanted him to hug you, hold you tight and tell you everything was okay. That all the years you spent apart were worth it and necessary.

“Uh, I don’t know. I guess I usually just don’t have time for myself.”

“You don’t hang out with your friends?”

You smiled awkwardly. “I…don’t have any friends. I’ve been working a lot since Mia was born, so I don’t really have time to make friends. And I also don’t have a babysitter nor would I trust a random person to watch her.”

Although he tried to hide it, there was a gloominess in his eyes as he listened to you. "I understand and I'm sorry you went through so much. I'm serious when I say I will always be here for the both of you no matter what. I lov-I care about you and Mia so much and would never do anything else to hurt you. I promise." He grabbed your hand that rested on the table and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

You caught how he almost said he loved you. Did he really or was he just saying that to make you trust him? The feeling felt foreign after so many years and you weren’t sure how to handle it.

“I had fun today daddy!" Mia rushes over to hug him and he picks her up and squeezes her tight.

"Aww I'm so glad you did, daddy had fun too. I'll come see you and mommy again soon okay?" He put her down and watched her run back to you. He walked over to hug you also, hesitating a bit but went through with it when you didn't back away.

It was more like a side hug because he didn't want to make you uncomfortable, but it was a hug nonetheless. You surprised yourself letting him get so close but even with the 2 seconds his arm wrapped around you, it felt so nice to be in his arms again. He was softening the walls you built up and it made you feel stupid for letting it happen so quickly.

"Thank you for taking care of her for so long, you're such a good mother. I'm going to keep my promise to the both of you, I'm very serious about this. You have my number, so don't hesitate to call me and ask for anything. I'm right here and from now on I will always be here."

You bit on the inside of your lip and focused your gaze toward the ground. You weren't sure if you wanted to slap him then hug him or just hug him. You waited this long to have someone by your side to make you feel like you weren't alone in all this but it still made you feel so uneasy, and truthfully it was stressful. You were going to trust him this time and see where it got you, already preparing yourself for the worst.

In the next few weeks, he kept in touch to either check on you and Mia or to ask if you needed anything from him. You were growing soft to him, falling in love with him all over. You felt like you were finally getting the attention you'd been missing all this time and it felt weird knowing it was coming from him.

Today, he was coming over to help with grocery shopping. You told him he didn't have to but he insisted on helping and carrying the groceries in the house so you wouldn't have to move a muscle.

"That's what I'm here for" he said when you told him you'd been doing it by yourself this whole time. "You don't have to worry about that type of thing anymore with me here."

Shopping went well until some jerk decided to hit you with his cart because you stood in front of something he wanted.

Jaehyun went over and shoved him on the shoulder. "What’s wrong with you man?! You couldn't just say excuse me?!"

The man went to shove Jaehyun back but he slapped the guy's hand away before it connected. "Maybe tell your stupid girlfriend to read the room and not stand in front of stuff, asshole."

"Hey man, watch your mouth around my daughter and don't talk about my girl like that.” He took a step closer to the man. “You better apologize before I fuck you up."

A blush painted your cheeks hearing the conversation between the two men. You looked over at Mia whose lip was pouting as she tried not to cry. You hurried to the front of the cart and hugged her against your chest to shush her. They argued continuously and you saw Jaehyun's hand ball into a fist. You went over and rubbed his arm to hopefully ease his anger.

"Jae it's not worth it, people like him don't deserve your time.”

His jaw clenched and his fist unclenched. He goes to turn around and the man says one last thing to tip Jaehyun over the top.

"Yeah man listen to your girlfriend, she's a keeper. If you don't fuck her, I will."

Jaehyun turns around and punches the man in the face, causing him to stumble back against the shelves. Both you and Mia scream and you stop Jaehyun from landing another punch. Security comes to further break up the fight and ask about what happened. Thankfully there were witnesses who vouched for Jaehyun and the guard let him off the hook while escorting the belligerent man out the store.

Jae went back to pushing Mia in the cart and thumbed away her drying tears. "I'm so sorry Mia, daddy didn't mean for you to see him that way. He doesn't like for anyone to say bad things about his girls." He looked up at you and offered an apologetic smile.

Back in the car, you noticed his knuckles slightly bruised as his hand rests on top of the gear shift. You looked up at him and could tell he was still slightly annoyed by the situation from earlier. You placed your hand on top of his and his expression softened.

"Thank you for earlier, for protecting us. I don't want you getting yourself into trouble over anything like that though."

"Y/N I know, I'm sorry. I just couldn't handle him talking about you like that."

"Jae...I'm not even your girlfriend though."

"You're special to me and the mother of my child, so it doesn't really matter." he says as he backs into your driveway. He looks back at you, slightly leaning onto your armrest. "Don't ever think that someone will be able to talk crazy about you in front of me."

You quickly avoided his gaze and unbuckled your seat belt. "I have to get her inside so she can eat and get ready for bed, it's late."

He sighed to himself and pressed the button to open the trunk. "Okay I'll get the bags, just get Mia and open the door for me."

He helped you bring in all the bags and even put the groceries away. This was his first time being in your home and it truly felt odd.

"Daddy, are you going to stay and eat dinner with me and mommy?"

He stopped playing with her and looked up at you, who looked back at him.

"Uh, I'm pretty sure mommy is sleepy baby, maybe another time? You have to get to sleep soon after you eat."

She pouted her lips and looked at you. It wouldn't hurt to have him stay since he was so nice and helpful today.

"No, I'm actually fine and I would love to repay you for your kindness. Stay with us for dinner Jae."

He looked down at Mia and they both smiled. He kissed her forehead and got up to come into the kitchen with you. "Well at least let me help with dinner." He grabbed your waist and slid past you to get to the fridge. "Lemme know what you need and I'll cut, chop or whatever else for you."

For dinner, you made chicken parmesan and caesar salad. He did a lot of the prep work and set the table after. You caught yourself blushing a few times having him stand next to you and from the overall interactions.

"Come on Mia, let's eat!" you had to get her attention since she was fully focused on whatever storyline she made up for her dolls.

"It smells so good mommy, I'm so hungry!"

Jaehyun chuckled and you smiled at her compliments. "Well daddy helped too so you have to tell him that too."

Her mouth formed a small "oh" and her eyebrows stood in shock. "Daddy's a chef!"

You both laugh at her choice of words and get settled at the table, ready to eat. Dinner was a success, everyone had perfectly clean plates and bowls. Maybe it was because you were happy, but dinner just tasted so much better. Maybe you should have him over more often.

"Daddy...do you love mommy?" The sudden question from Mia made both you and Jaehyun quickly look up at her, you almost choking on the drink you were sipping.

"Why do you ask Mia?" Jaehyun is the first to speak up after the slightly long silence.

"Well...you always tell me you love me but you never say it to mommy and mommy never says it to you. But you should love each other because that's just how mommies and daddies are."

He chuckled nervously, unsure of how to respond. He cleared his throat when he felt your eyes on him, waiting to see what he would tell her.

"Yes...I do love mommy. I will always love her so don't you worry okay? Come on, let's go get ready for bed. I want to say goodnight to you before I go."

He got up from the table and took her in the bathroom so she could brush her teeth. You leaned forward, elbows resting on the table. You wanted to pull your hair out. Knowing he still had feelings for you made this so much harder. You loved him too, you know you did and you never doubted it. It was just still so hard to accept that he wouldn't do anything to mess up whatever you had now.

After cleaning the dinner dishes, you went and sat on the couch and opened a bottle of wine you had stored for a few months. You set down your glass and pulled out the cork. You weren't much of a drinker, but tonight you were in need.

You turned around when you heard the door to Mia's room close and saw Jaehyun tiptoeing away from it. He put his finger to his lips to tell you to stay quiet.

"She's asleep, she was so tired." He came around and sat on the couch with you, eyeing the bottle of wine on the coffee table. "Mind if I stay for a drink?"

You shook your head and pointed to the cabinet containing the glasses and he grabbed one before reclaiming his spot on the couch. You both sat in silence having finished your quarter full glasses a while ago. You looked in the direction of Mia's room and looked back at Jaehyun, both of your elbows resting on the back of the couch.

"You mean a lot to her Jae, I can see how much she loves spending time with you."

"What about you?"

The question threw you off guard but you should have expected it after he confessed his feelings at the dinner table. "What about me?"

"Do I mean a lot to you? I know I messed up a lot in the past, but I'm really trying Y/N."

Your eyes met his again and if there was one word that would describe the way he looked at you, it would be genuine. You knew he was telling the truth and you knew he expected an answer.

"I-I...I don't know Jae, honestly this whole thing has been terrifying and I can't help but want to keep my guard up. I've been so alone these past few years that accepting you back into my life scares me so much. I just don't want to be alone again..."

He grabbed your face in his hands and softly kissed your forehead. "I know, I know and I'm sorry. My babygirl didn't deserve that and I really want to make it up to you. Just trust me and let me take care of you and Mia, let me be in your life again. Please."

You felt stuck, stuck in between wanting to hate him and wanting to let him love you, leaning more toward the latter. Perhaps it was the tiny bit of wine in your system, definitely not enough to get you drunk, but enough to give you confidence.

You leaned forward and kissed him, heart beating fast enough to power a machine. When you leaned back, he looked at you with an unreadable expression. The alcohol immediately left your bloodstream and your face burned with embarrassment.

"Jae I'm sorry, I shouldn't have-"

He pulls you back into the kiss, hand dragging you in by the waist. He put his all into it and you were starting to feel dizzy. The last time you kissed him was before you had Mia, so to say the kiss had your body heating with lust was an understatement.

He tugged at you and pulled you into his lap, your arms immediately wrapping around his neck. His hands were everywhere, never stopping in one place for too long. He slid his hands under your shirt, playing with your boobs for a quick second before tossing the shirt over your head. He broke the kiss and looked at your chest like a kid in a candy store. You wanted to cover them with your hands, but he slipped a hand behind your back to unclasp your bra before you could.

Your breasts fell free and he wasted no time in letting his lips wrap around your nipple. His hand came up to massage the other one and your hands came up to tangle in his hair. After not being with him for so long, you forgot just how much you missed the sex with him. He was always a giver and always made sure you came even if he didn't. Eventually his hands traveled down your back and landed on your hips. He rolled his hips up into you and you both moaned into the kiss.

You reached down between your bodies and palmed him through the pants he wore. He ground up into your hand and you felt just how hard he was. As you began to fiddle with the waistband, he shifted and eased you down onto the couch as he moved between your legs.

"Jae-"

"Shh shh baby, let me take care of you tonight. Let me show you how much I missed you."

He kissed his way down your stomach, placing a kiss on each side of your hip bones. He slipped off your skirt and panties in one go, a string of your arousal sticking to your underwear.

"Fuck, you're so wet..." He bit his lip and dragged a finger through your folds, playing with the slippery mess between them.

He bent down to connect his lips to your pussy. He made a few circles around your clit with his tongue, earning moans from you, before slipping a finger in. You gasped and your hips bucked involuntarily. He moved them faster and faster, holding your thigh down with the hand not in use. You can tell he was enjoying this just as much as you were with his heavy breathing and the way he slightly humped the couch beneath him.

He then used the hand holding down your thigh to rub circles on your clit as his tongue joined his fingers.

“Jae, I’m so close!”

Your legs tried closing but he used his elbows to stop them.

“Cum for me baby, let it out.” The vibrations of his voice sent shockwaves through your nerves.

The simultaneous stimulation sent you over the edge and your toes curled almost cramping your foot. He brought his hand up to his mouth and sucked his fingers clean, never breaking eye contact.

He moved up your body to trap you in another kiss, this time your hand finding a way to his nether regions. You dipped your hands into his pants and into his underwear to stroke his length. He stopped focusing on the kiss for a few seconds and rutted into your hand.

“Jae, please fuck me while my mind is clear.”

He quickly removed everything from the waist down and now you both lay naked on the couch. He tapped his dick on your clit and rubbed it through your folds a few times to get it wet. He eased into you and cursed under his breath. It’s been so long that you forgot just how big he was, stretching you to new lengths but it felt so good.

“Fuck, you’re so big.”

“Did you forget already?” he laughed with his brows furrowed as he concentrated on not cumming too quickly. “Fuck you’re so fucking wet.”

You grabbed onto his biceps as he got balls deep, feeling so stretched and full. You moaned when he started thrusting into you slowly, bucking your hips to match his speed. He grabbed onto your waist and sped up his pace, skin slapping against each other.

“Fuck Daddy that feels so good~” you tried to stop your eyes from rolling back from the pleasure.

“Shit, if you call me that again I might get too rough.”

You looked up at him through hooded lids, his lip caught between teeth as he tried to keep it together. But you didn’t want that, you wanted him to fuck you into an empty headspace. You wanted to forget everything he’s ever done wrong and trust him as he is now.

“Fuck me harder Daddy, don’t hold back.” You wrapped your legs around his waist and you could see the switch in his eyes.

He pulled out of you and flipped you over with ease. Now you laid in a “face down ass up” position ready to take whatever he gave you. He rubbed his hands up and down your body, grinding his dick against your folds.

“Gosh I missed this pussy so much…” He lined himself up and slammed back in making you gasp.

This angle and the speed he chose truly did make you feel like he was fucking your thoughts away. By this time you were basically screaming, not able to make full sentences. He grabbed a handful of your hair and pulled you up as he bent down and whispered in your ear.

“Not too loud, you don’t want Mia to wake up and hear how much of a slut you are.” He tugged on your hair harder and thrust into you harder, your moans getting louder. He landed a slap on your ass and covered your mouth with the other.

“Fuck Jae! I’m gonna cum!” You tried moving your body forward to give yourself some time to breathe, your heart pumping like you were on a treadmill.

The hand over your mouth slid down and wrapped around your throat and he was back at your ear.

“Stop running and take this dick. Let Daddy fuck the stress out of you.” He reached down with his other hand and rubbed harsh circles on your clit. He felt your walls squeeze around his girth and he knew you were close and he wasn’t too far himself. “Cum for me baby, I know you want to.”

“Oh god Jae! It feels so fucking good~”

Your toes were curling, your walls were clenching and your vision was dimming. Your orgasm was approaching quickly and you knew it would be mind blowing. His thrusts were getting sloppier so you knew the way your pussy sucked him in had his head spinning.

“Fuck, where you want my cum baby?”

“Inside Jae, please!” You knew you hadn’t been on birth control in a while but something in you made you feel safe enough to choose the most dangerous answer.

He loved fucking you raw, but getting to also cum inside did something to him. Telling him that seemed to power his thrusts, they were now like he wanted to split you in half.

“Missed Daddy so much you want him to fuck another baby in you?” His hips were starting to stutter, you felt way too good around him. “Fuck, please cum with me, cum all over me baby. God you feel so good around my dick.”

His hand moved from your clit to go up and squeeze your nipple while he bit down on you shoulder. The mixed pain and pleasure pushed you to your orgasm and you squeezing around him pushed him to his, both screaming out each other’s name. He pulled out and watched his cum drip out of you, the sight alone could make him hard again.

Him inching out of you was just as euphoric but your body had no strength to keep itself up for another round. You laid there evening out your breaths with a smile spread across your face. You heard him shuffling around behind you and eventually he came back with a warm towel to clean you up.

He placed gentle kisses down your spine and rubbed where he left a handprint on your ass. “I’m sorry if I was too rough.”

“You were rough, but you know that’s how I like it.” You chuckled and built up enough strength to sit up and look at him. He looked amazing all fucked out and sweaty, you wanted to pounce on him again. “Thank you for helping to ease my mind.”

“I want to do that for you more often, I wanna be your man again Y/N. I’m sorry for everything I said and did to you to make you feel like I didn’t love you anymore. I love you so much and I will spend the rest of my life making sure you know that.”

You quickly wiped the tears that threatened to fall and looked away from him. He pulled you into a hug and rubbed your head and back. You wrapped your arms around him and fully embraced the hug. There was no holding back now, you accepted him and was ready to give him another chance.

“Don’t go, stay with me tonight.”

“Of course baby, I’m never leaving you again.”

Over the next few months, Jaehyun frequented your home, whether it was to run errands with you, drop Mia off from school or just to spend time with the both of you. There were days you also spent nights at his place. The sex was also constant. No matter where or when, he would have you bent over or pinned up against something as he slammed into you.

You loved every second of it, having him by your side on the daily again. He often brought you and Mia around his job to meet his coworkers whenever they had events, even making friends with one of the other families who had kids around Mia’s age. He showed you off like an art piece, one that only he possessed. You were his to keep and everyone else barely had the privilege to look.

“Hey baby mama, so the office is having a party to celebrate the collab of our international partnership and I want you to come with me.” He stood behind you with his arms wrapped around your waist, peppering kisses on your neck as you stood making your cup of tea.

“Haha ew Jae do not call me that. Of course I’ll go baby, when is it?” You turned around and wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him.

He sighed happily. “I will never get tired of your kisses babygirl. It’s next week and it starts at 8 and I know you’re worried about a babysitter for Mia, but Tracy said she could watch her because she didn’t want to go.”

It didn’t hurt to let her watch Mia, this would be the first time you and Jae did something together without her. You thought about it for a few seconds more then nodded your head. He smiled brightly and kissed you again.

The venue was classy and you understood why Jaehyun told you to get so dressed up. You didn’t have anything to wear so he took you shopping the day before to get everything you needed. With him by your side, you felt like a billionaire. You wore a long black draped collar dress that was made with a sparkly fabric, a slit going up your right leg.

Jae loved it on you, bending you over in it when he came to see it on you in the dressing room. Speaking of him, he wore a plain black suit with a matching tie and white button down. He looked good and with the way his hand kept rubbing your ass, you knew he’d take you somewhere later to fuck you.

Everyone commented on how great you two looked as a couple as you walked to your table. The event wasn’t very long so there were only standing tables with drinks and small hors d’oeuvres. His boss stood in the middle of the large open space and tapped the microphone to get everyone’s attention.

“First and foremost I’d like to thank everyone for coming. Today we celebrate the long awaited partnership with Korea in order to expand our company. It is thanks to all of you that we were able to achieve such a wonderful thing and hopefully we continue to grow.” He turns to look in the direction of you and Jaehyun. “We have also gathered here today for something else special, so if you would all please turn your attention this way.”

You were confused and when you went to turn and ask Jaehyun what was going on, you looked down and saw him on one knee. Your eyes widened and you covered your mouth with your hands. You blinked back as many tears as you could while he spoke.

“Babygirl, I know we’ve gone through some rough times, you more than me, but I’m going to continue to keep my promise to you and Mia for as long as I live. You are my sunshine, my rock, my everything and I love you so much. You are the one I want to spend the rest of my life with, not as your boyfriend but as your husband. Y/N will you marry me?”

There was no fighting off the tears this time and you nodded your head as you continued to say yes. The whole room filled with cheers as he placed the ring on your finger and stood up to pull you into a kiss. You hugged him tight and his hand rested on the small of your back.

“Yay mommy and daddy are going to get married!”

Shocked, you turn around and see Mia all dressed up. You look up and see Tracy waving at you from the other side and you wave back. Jaehyun picks Mia up and holds her between the both of you.

“See, daddy told you he would love mommy forever.”

#nct jaehyun #nct #nct 127 #nct jaehyun smut #jaehyun

672 notes · View notes

catsfor2 · 1 year

Text

hit me, part 2.5 (bonus baby)

wc: 1.1k, unedited warnings: swearing/language a/n: im sooooo tired so im sorry if this stinks. but anyway. I hope you guys like it regardless. ALSO wanted to also remind everyone that my requests are wide open ;)!! tags: @elliewilliamsmunch@intrnetdoll@me-and-your-husband@3zae-zae3@milahnoz@elliescumm@dragonasflowercrown@starpix@nopealoupe@annamommyy@muthafuckingstargirl

-j

part 1

part 1.5

part 2

Another meek chime rings out from your bed, calling to you, forcing you to slam your textbook shut out of frustration.

You’d been studying for maybe four hours at this point. It was far past dark, the sky now an opaque charcoal. Your eyes are aching. Your back is sore. It was time to take a break.

You hop on your bed, body weight causing it to gently bounce you up and down a few times.

You click your phone on.

New message from (+14556768854)

Image from (+14556768854)

New message from (+14556768854)

You hesitantly open it up, eyes squinting and head shunned like it might be something unsavory.

(+14556768854)

hey

can u tell me if this looks serious

IMG_5354 [Click to Download]

pls respond

y/n

Your heart lurches.

These texts were from Ellie.

Instantly on edge, and you frantically poke the image link to see it, tapping it repeatedly as if that would speed it up. It buffers, agonizingly, and you prepare yourself to see a grotesque and mangled amalgamation of colors in the next few seconds.

It finally loads.

You scan it quickly, studying and prodding the image with your eyes.

Your mouth flattens.

It’s…just a picture of her flexing.

Your thumbs type at an alarming speed.

that was not fuckijng funny

You throw your phone back at your mattress, deciding to ignore whatever nonsense Ellie will respond with.

It chimes immediately.

You regretfully pick it back up, still angry, and open to read what she says.

lol

“…Fucking stupid…” you mutter, already typing at your response.

im serious

thats not why i gave u my number

why then

You roll your eyes, memory already recalling a couple of days ago, where you very clearly and very obviously told her why.

for emergencies

or if u need me for something important idk

i dont wanna see your thirst traps

You knew that last part was a lie before you even typed it out. That picture she sent was not what you were expecting, but it still turned your insides to mush. It still had you a bit uneasy, nauseous even. Ellie had power over your body like that.

hmmm

i have an emergency

really bad one

You wait on her answer, skeptically, watching those three dots dance around in circles.

im hungry

You let out a sigh.

Then you click your phone off, throwing it elsewhere, and dejectedly gazing at the textbook sitting on your desk. Your professor would want you to, right?

Your phone interrupts you again, noisily snatching your attention with its sounds and jostling your focus from the book.

The sounds don’t stop.

Fuck, you think. Your phone is ringing.

You jerk to pick it up, fingers fumbling it, until finally you’re able to click ‘answer’ and bring it to your ear.

You’re quiet, hoping Ellie will speak first.

“Hi.” a voice says, and you quickly connect that it’s just Ellie’s, sleep riddled and raspy.

“…Hi.”

“So…what’d you think?”

Your eyebrows crease.

“Of what?”

“'Of what?' Of my fuckin’ progress, that’s what! Anthony has me eating, like, six whole chickens a week.” she boasts.

“Oh. I didn’t really…see?…I guess? I don’t know…”

“I mean—I’ve gained almost 30 this year.”

You remain confused. Is that a lot…?

Ellie must understand your silence for what it is and continues.

“Pounds, princess. Muscle. I’m getting fuckin’ huge.”

Oh.

“Okay—I got it now. Um…congrats, then.”

“What, that’s it? That’s all you got for me?”

“I—I don’t know!” you defend, voice coming out a bit louder and higher. “Your muscles look—like, big, all the time! I can’t tell the difference!”

She laughs loudly into the receiver, and you can’t help the smile you wear, hearing it so amplified in your ear.

“You need more pictures? I got more pictures.” she assures.

Simultaneous with her voice, you feel the sharp vibration and hear the dingy chime of your phone.

“Just took that one. You should look at it.” she adds, tone low but casual.

You deeply blush, feeling exposed despite being so alone in your bedroom.

“…Okay.” you agree, sliding the phone off your face to open it up.

A mirror reflection of Ellie’s back fills your screen, stretched and taut into a flexed pose. Her arms are out beside her head, clenched impossibly tight, in effort to completely portray her physique. Your eyes flick down, noticing in the image that she’s wearing only boxers.

She just took that picture?

The air in your room feels warmer, hotter than ever, so you strip down to a tank top and underwear. It feels wrong, almost. Talking to Ellie with this much skin showing. Her not knowing.

“Hello? You there?” Ellie loudly repeats over the speaker, audio fuzzy and weak.

You grasp your phone back up, stuttering out a response.

“Yeah—yes, here. I’m here.”

“'Kay. Your turn.”

You almost drop the device completely.

“My turn?”

“Fair’s only fair, right?”

“…Ellie…” you protest, skin burning with even the idea of her seeing you.

“C’mon, please? I took mine already, you can’t go back.”

You say nothing, whole body sweating, hoping and praying she’ll just forget about it.

“…I wanna see you.” she admits, voice warm and fuzzy through the speaker.

Your cheeks erupt red, a sense of burning flowing throughout your whole body at her words. You curl up, thighs squeezing at themselves, and try to answer.

“But—I’m…I’m in…pajamas.” you whisper, looking down at your bare legs and sheer top.

“You are? Even better.”

“I—I don’t know—”

“You really don’t have to. I’ll live, princess. I promise.”

Your body relaxes entirely, a breath of pure relief leaving your lips, as well as a forceful yawn. Ellie must’ve heard it through the phone.

“Aww—you tired? Should I hang up?”

“No! Don’t hang up! I want to keep talking! I was studying before so I’m a little—a little out of it but—”

“Nope. I’m hangin’ up. Princess needs her beauty sleep.”

“What—no, Ellie.” you argue, albeit lazily, as the energy you have left is truly running low.

“I’ll be here in the morning, won’t I? Good-niiiight—” she lulls, drawing out the last word.

“No! Don’t hang up! Ellie!”

On the other end of the phone, there’s only quiet.

An abyss of silence.

“…Ellie?” you try, voice small.

Nothing.

Your mouth purses, frustrated, as you listen to the absent noise through the speaker.

Still nothing.

You flip over, hostilely pulling the comforter over yourself and crashing your head into the pillow. You feel cold, but you know an extra blanket or some layers wouldn’t make you any warmer. Only she could.

Before you can shut your eyes, the chime sporadically rings out again, and you find yourself rapidly grasping the phone from your mattress.

Immediately you unlock it.

(+14556768854)

sweet dreams

dont let the bed bugs bute

fuck

bite *

call you tomorrow

Your eyelids finally shut, the weight of the day keeping them closed indefinitely. Your limbs go lax, succumbing to exhaustion.

You permit yourself to fall asleep, now knowing fully, that you will have the sweetest of dreams.

#ellie x reader #ellie williams #ellie tlou #ellie fic #ellie williams x reader #lesbian #tlou #tlou part 2 #catsfor2

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dxmoness · 6 months

Text

─────── NEW ROMANTICS.

✩ ིྀ ! WE'RE ALL BORED, WE'RE ALL SO TIRED OF EVERYTHING ! •˙ ⌗

𓂃 ࣪ c. henituse + boredom has its own solutions ˖ 𖦹

“this is so boring.” cale groans as he fiddles with the piece of parchment in his hand. his eyes linger towards the female who was indulged in reading something about mystics, that he could have sworn she said was a stupid book that was nonfactual yet still read with an engrossed desire.

“Oi. Earth to name, i am in dire need of some affectionate company over here.” he seemed sarcastic in saying it, but in his heart he really did. the female did not move an inch, immediately realizing the depth of her reading he decides to take a different approach or entertainment and just simply admires her from where he is.

he sighs deeply before he buries his face in the books and sleeps. only now did name notice him, a small smile flickered on her delicate lips as she looks for something he could lay his head on that wasn't a hardbound book.

she takes off her own coat, not at all minding the freezing frostbite of air she felt as she folds it up and places it under his head, slipping off the book and replacing it in a quick motion.

proud of her work, she made the decision to return to her book. before she could, cale’s hand shot out and kissed her soft fingers. his lips grazing on her knuckles brought more than enough colour to her pale skin.

embarrassed as she was, she gave him a playful swat and left. leaving a chuckling cale behind.

✩ ིྀ ! HEARTBREAK IS OUR NATIONAL ANTHEM, WE SING IT PROUDLY ! •˙ ⌗

𓂃 ࣪ j. agriche + how to get away from political marriage ˖ 𖦹

for some reason, her best friend jeremy had the sudden idea to meet her in the woods in secret and she hasn't the foggiest idea why.

but like the good friend she is, she went anyway. she enters the quiet midst of the forest. her eyes look warily around her, noticing a whine of a horse she follow the direction of the sound.

she finds jeremy, sitting on his horse. his blue eyes seem to shine when he sees her. he slides off and takes her hand, kissing it gently.

“lovely to see you've come, my beautiful lady.” you could swear it almost sounded sincere, but that is simply uncertain due to jeremy being an agriche by heart.

“yes, yes. what's the meaning of this?” she responds, her response seemed to make him flinch.

“i’ve upset you, my lady. that was not my intention.” jeremy murmured. “but let's get straight to the point, i'm here to let you in on one or my schemes.” he could tell this peaked her fragile line of interest. “i need you to be my pretty mistress.”

“what?!” she is stunned to say the least. and she had every right to be.

he gave a small smile to her outburst. “my father wants me in a political marriage and i do not like the woman i’ve been paired up with.” “so you're asking me to helo you break here heart?” name asks and he nods. “are you insane? sign me in.” she grins and jeremy chuckles, patting her head.

in the end, the fake relationship for heartbreak turned to a real one that they consummated quickly.

✩ ིྀ ! PLEASE TAKE MY HAND AND PLEASE TAKE ME DANCING ! •˙ ⌗

𓂃 ࣪ h. niccolo + a dance with the marquis ˖ 𖦹

it all went by so fast, the marquis spoke with her and a moment later took her to dance. his fingers intertwined with hers, his arm on her waist. the two of them swayed gracefully on the dance floor.

their dance seemed to catch everyone's attention as everyone seemed mesmerized. it ie understandable. even she is. the marquis is beautiful, breathtaking. words could not describe his elegance, his looks. he is an angel that descended from heaven.

and to be dancing with him? that is a high honour for her. she is absolutely in awe. also quite panicky. she didn't want to do any wrong, especially not with him as her partner.

he suddenly carried her and spun her around moving her down, they spin and twirl for ages. when they finish, he guides her to the quieter parts of the party. his eye filled with love and admiration as he kisses her on the hand.

“thank you dearest. it was a lovely time to dance with you.” hie voice is soft, gentle, soothing... his purple eyes is fixated on her own. his hand slipe and caresses her cheek. “you look ravishing, my lady.”

this brought a flush of colour on her cheeks. “thank you..”

“no problem.” he smiles and kisses her cheek so suddenly. “please excuse me now, lovely. i’ll see you again sometime, yes?” he asks, and she nods.

✦. ⊹ ˚ dedicated to @bertry3 !! gift no.2

guests — @lombxrdi , @achy-boo ,

@crownxie , @histxricaldrama ,

@yevene , @nyrwve , @hikamins : ˚⊹ ᰔ

────────────────────

take inspo or translate my

work! none of the chars i

write for are mine unless

stated!

#manhwa #manhwa x reader #jeremy agriche x reader #twtpflob #twtpflob x reader #the way to protect the female lead's older brother #the way to protect the female lead's older brother x reader #trash of the count's family #trash of the duke's family #trash of the count's family x reader #cale henituse x reader #your throne #your throne x reader #helio niccolo #helio niccolo x reader #helio tropium x reader #— the skillfulness of the deities. . . . written works ♡#— a field of dreams and desires. . . . manhwa ♡

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callmerainman · 2 months

Text

Accidentally In Love | sinner!Adam x fem!sinner!Reader

PART 1 | PART 2

plot. You and Adam became friends with benefits. The lines of your situationship are blurred. Even more so when you and the First Man get closer and closer. What will it take you to understand that you and Adam are falling in love?

word count. 3.8k

tags. enemies to lovers, sinner!Adam, friends with benefits, sexual content, p in v sex, Adam Has a Heart, falling in love, Reader has wings, Reader is Lucifer's Royal Guard.

TW! this chapter contains an explicit sexual scene, MINORS DNI

taglist. @kaces-mind @call-me-nyxx @serendipitous-fernweh @plutodestr0yedme @luvvnightingalee

a/n. here it is, final chapter! Thank you for reading this silly little fic, I'll for sure write more about Adam soon! Hope you enjoyed it <3

"and now I go and spoil it all by saying somethin' stupid like I love you"

—

It’s karaoke night for you and Adam. Yeah, karaoke night. At first it started off as a joke. One time, after an usual afternoon of strenuous intercourse, you and Adam found yourselves singing “Out on the Tiles” by Led Zeppelin. You had decided to put on some music in shuffle to try to muffle up your obscene sounds that both of you understood you couldn’t contain. Next thing you knew you and Adam were performing an improvised gig on the already ruined bed of your room.

“I’m so glad I’m living and gonna tell the world I am” you sang out of your lungs, holding an imaginary mic.

You pointed towards Adam, prompting him to finish the lyrics. Smiling, Adam clenched his hand in a fist to pretend to be on the mic too. He leaned backwards, throwing his head back.

“I got me a fine woman and she says that I’m her man” he sang back, enthusiastically.

This singing shenanigans would happen so often that you decided to set your own karaoke night on Fridays. You and Adam stole a karaoke machine from a bar and installed it in his room. And now he’s holding you by the shoulders, vigorously shaking you in a playful manner as you can’t stop laughing.

“Feels like you’re dying, you’re dying” he sings with all the air he could gather.

You bend in half, this time a real mic in your hand “Youuuuuuu, your sex is on fire”.

Adam mimics a guitar riff with an high pitched voice as you sing along to Kings of Leon.

“Consuuuuuumed, with what’s to transpire!” Adam goes, crouching onwards himself.

Something definitely changed between you and Adam. You still don’t know what it is but it’s pacifying you.

—

The other patrons at the Hotel noticed, even though a bit later. Your relationship was so obviously sexual that none of them really stopped to think if there was more. Until signs started to show.

One time, all of you were watching a movie downstairs. You had forced Adam to participate even if he didn’t want to and was suggesting to have another karaoke night instead. But in the end, you both plopped down on the couch next to each other with everyone and got comfortable in front of a romantic comedy Charlie put on. At first, you and Adam tried to keep your facade of annoyance. You and him were so dense, you didn’t think the others knew that you two were fucking, so you had to pretend to still hate each other. But, as the movie progressed, you and Adam lost your purpose of showing a fake resentment. You glanced down and noticed the tip of your fingers resting really close to Adam’s. His fingers, weirdly enough, were moving in a jerking motion, stroking the fabric of the couch back and forth, as if he was nervous. You moved your fingers closer. With unusual uncertainty from his part, Adam slid his fingers even closer to yours, making them touch. And you and Adam held hands. You decided not to mention it, staring at the TV with your face on fire and his cheeks colored in a red hue. Your hands stayed intertwined the whole movie, and when it ended you separated quickly, again naively thinking that nobody noticed. But, during the movie, Angel had definitely noticed. The spider demon let out one of the loudest gasps in his life as he covered his mouth with four hands. When you and Adam went upstairs later, everyone was still hanging out in the common room. And Angel raised his shoulders and arms.

“Are y’all blind or did you see what I saw?” he asked, almost irritated.

“What?” Cherri asked while mindlessly scrolling on her phone.

“Like, (Y/N) and Adam holding hands?!” he exclaimed, his arms dramatically falling flat on his sides.

“They’ve been fucking like two horny rabbits for months and this is where you draw the line?” Husk questions, raising a red eyebrow.

“Fucking is one thing, holding hands while watching a romantic movie is another!” Angel protest.

Cherri chuckles “It’s obvious by the amount of sex they have that there’s more”.

“Obvious?” Angel questions “Uhhh, hello?? Hate sex is a thing!”.

And that wasn’t the one and only time. Seems so obvious to everyone now, except to you two. It’s in the way you and Adam snuggle during movies, or when you’re cooking and he hugs you from behind, resting his chin in the space between your horns. It’s in the fact that you don’t call each other names anymore unless you’re having sex. Or when you fly around the city together pulling pranks on people, and sing your hearts out during karaoke. Now it’s not only in the way you two wildly wrestle under the sheets. It’s in the goofy way you try to sweep it under the carpet.

“Uh, we’re going upstairs uh to…FIGHT! Definitely not to have sex! Because we hate SEX!” Adam stopped “No wait, I love sex, I mean-“

“We’d HATE to have sex with each other!” you say, trying to back him up.

“Exactly, not with such a stupid cunt!”

“Hey, too much” you whisper, elbowing his side.

“Oh shit I’m so sorry babe”

And everybody looked at you the most unconvinced, inexpressive poker face. But Charlie, underneath, felt that it was heartwarming. Even if Adam whispered in your ear a “can’t wait to fuck your brains out” when displaying apparent affection, she knew that something was going on and it was nothing but beautiful. This is the purpose of the Hazbin Hotel, after all.

—

Honestly you have no idea what you and Adam are right now. First, you were just a Royal Guard who had to surveil the First Man on Earth, the Exterminator. Then you became his friend with benefits. Now sex is still here, but maybe you’re more friends than anything? Or more. Nothing was defined. You never set boundaries. You had your fair chances of getting intimate with other people, but it felt so wrong so you never went for sex. Adam felt the same. When Cherri brought everyone to the club to have a night out, he had his opportunities to have sex with other girls. But he just didn’t feel like it was right. Especially not if you were in the club with him.

“You can do what you like, you know?” you suggested him in his ear one of those times, in a space between the bar counter and the dance floor. But Adam just shook his head.

“Nah, don’t really feel like it. I mean, yeah that bitch with the black top was all over me but she’s not my type”

He tried to play it cool, not looking at you in the eyes. But in reality, Adam was just checking around to see if your friends were looking. And when he made sure that they were out of sight, he cupped your face in his hands and kissed you deeply. It was unexpected coming from him, sure, but you let yourself melt in his kisses as music bumped in your ears. Something was happening.

—

“Here you are” you say.

Your hair is flowing, moved by the slow but firm flapping of your wings. You’re suspended meters and meters high, just in front of the Hazbin Hotel sign. Adam is sitting on the “Z”, holding his golden guitar in his hands. He looks kinda annoyed.

“I was just practicing guitar” he says.

“And I’m still a Royal Guard on duty”

“If your duty is going at it with the one guy you were supposed to surveil, then you’re already doing a great job”

You roll your eyes and scoff “Funny, very funny Adam”.

“Alright, you can hear me play something” he gives in.

“As long as it’s not Wonderwall”

“The fuck no, I fuckin’ hate the Oasis!”

So, with another flap of your wings, you gracefully land next to him. You expect Adam to go wild with one of his exaggerated, over-the-top and ego-boosting guitar solos. But instead, Adam quietly starts a finger picking, quite tune. It’s not a specific rock song, just a chill, peaceful chord progression. Adam starts humming a tune, eyes closed. You press your elbows against your knees and rest your cheek in the open palm of your hand, looking at the view. Pentagram City is a mess, for sure. But with Adam’s unusually calm vocalizing, and his presence, it feels like home. You peek a look at Adam. He’s still keeping his eyes closed, it’s the first time you see him so calm, and not his loud, immature self. He’s beautiful. You realize that your face is hot. And you can’t see it but your pupils are dangerously dilated. You press your lips together, and you feel your heart pounding in your chest. Oh you know what’s happening. Maybe you should make it stop. You try to take a deep breath. You’re so in love with Adam.

Adam is lost in his own thoughts and music. He was so comfortable in your presence as he strummed that he almost forgot you were there. He opens his eyes, he just wants to take a quick look at you before closing them again. He realizes that he’s done for the moment he sees how you’re looking at him. With shining eyes, dilated pupils, a fond smile on your face. He doesn’t really realize what it means for you, neither do you. But now his heart is beating at unprecedented speed. Shit, shit, shit. It’s not the first time it happens with you. One time, he felt this way when he woke up before you and saw you sleeping naked next to him, cuddled in his arms. The other was when you held hands for the first time during movie time with the other guests. But this time he’s feeling it on a whole other level. You’re so beautiful. And you’re standing by him listening to his tunes despite the man he is. The one who did so much harm but it’s trying to get better. Adam doesn’t know if he actually has gained any redeeming qualities, but one thing he’s sure about is that at least with you he is a better man. He thinks back on when you two used to argue non stop, resenting each other’s presence. It looks like a far, distant reality that never happened, if anything it’s at least a joke. Adam is so in love with you.

—

Sex still represents the majority of your relationship with Adam. Unlike your feelings, it never changed. Always so loud, fun, satisfying for sure, and unhinged. You and Adam could unleash your personalities at best under the sheets, and that was the best part of it. But this time, something is out of place. Not in a bad way, at all.

Adam is on top of you, placed between your spread legs. His wings are wide open, covering your naked bodies and encapsulating them in a small space reserved to only you two. His thrust are firm, but also slow and sensual, which wasn’t really his style. He’s holding your face with both hands, as he’s mesmerized by your deep moans of pleasure. You cling onto him with nails and legs, holding him as if he was about so slip away. You open your eyes, and catch him staring. He would usually say something sarcastic, like asking the fuck are you looking at. But instead, he looks lost in a profound state of blissful hypnosis, his pupils dilated and mouth slightly parted. Then, Adam plunges forward, still sliding in and out of you with slick sounds. Your breathing becomes even more irregular, hips jerking under his body as waves of pleasure hit you. You tug at Adam’s hair in the spot between his horns. With one hand, Adam firmly holds your hip, while the other has its fingers entangled in your hair, lightly pulling them.

“A-Adam…please I’m so close” you stutter. You would never beg usually, but this time it’s hard not to do so.

What surprises you is the way Adam responds. He would have usually bragged about you begging for him to make you reach your climax, reminding you how much of a whore you are for him. And you would have protested by flipping the roles and making him a mess under your body. But Adam just sinks his face in your neck, whispering.

“I know baby, I know. I got you” he says, interrupted by a moan “Fuck you’re doing so good I swear”.

His movements in you become more erratic, sloppier, and his breath hotter against your ear. The fingers plunged in your hair start stroking your scalp, you try to suffocate your moans of pleasure in his shoulder. You come first around his shaft, whispering quietly his name until you come down from your high. Adam climaxes second, emitting a low, strangled moan in your neck as his wings twitch. You take some time to realize how good it was, your chests rising and lowering with every breath, holding each other. It’s when your mind clears that you realize how atypical of a sexual encounter that was for you and Adam. It was…sweet? Really intimate and not in the physical meaning of the word? Adam never praised you in bed, and you never spoke to him so gently asking to make you finish. And the way he looked at you was absurd, to say at best. With a cherry colored hue on his cheeks, and a light in his eyes you rarely saw in him.

“Ah shit that was great” Adam chuckles, collapsing next to you.

The pride in his face says it all, maybe you were wrong before. You mentally shrug.

“Yeah” you roll on your side, facing him “but I’m so hungry right now”.

Adam sighs, looking up at the ceiling “When I was in Heaven, there was this place that delivered the best fucking ice cream your taste buds could ever graze. A mountain of it. Great for after sex I swear. I miss it”.

Adam takes the opportunity to talk about Heaven more. He’s clearly being nostalgic. He misses it. And while you like hearing him waffling about all the crazy concert he performed, the best restaurants, theme parks and clubs in Heaven, you can’t help but frown. A small smile still lingers on your face, but you ask yourself if Adam really belongs in here. A part of you says of course yes, the other is unsure.

“You know” you say, scooting closer to him “I’ve never really asked myself about how life in Heaven would be. But it really sounds like a beautiful place”.

Adam nods, twisting on his side to face you “Oh fuck yeah it was, I wish I could…”

He interrupts himself as he meets your face, pressed against the pillow. A small, comprehensive smile is gently placed on it, and your eyes are stuck in his own with a visible shine.

Oh no don’t look at me like that.

Adam’s grin disappears, he looks away and tries to play it cool as always, glancing around the room. He clears his throat.

“Yeah I mean, Heaven was great but under a certain perspective…” he trails off.

You wait for him to finish, and he can’t escape your eyes. He finally reciprocates again, getting lost into them.

“Hell is not half-bad, for some reasons” he says.

Adam doesn’t realize it, but now he’s smiling too. His eyebrows are arched upwards in adoration as he ponders on every inch of you. Your now relaxed expression, your glimmering eyes, your naked body covered in white sheets, your head slightly plunged in the pillow. Suddenly, Adam’s smile fades. His eyes go wide, and his heart skips a beat. A wave of realization hits him.

“Holy shit (Y/N) I’m so in love with you”.

Both of you jump in surprise, moving away from each other as the mattress bounces under your bodies. You clench the sheets, and you feel your heart pounding. Where did that come from?!

“What?!” you exclaim.

“WHAT?!” Adam yelps back, incredulous of his own words.

He didn’t mean to say it out loud, he didn’t even mean to say it in his mind actually. You can feel his own panic on your skin, as every inch of your body figuratively catches fire. You don’t know what to say. Adam sits up, covering his face with a hand in embarrassment.

“Fuck! I’m so sorry I ruined everything!” he exclaims, voice panicky.

“Ruined what?”

Oh no. It takes you a second to realize what you said. Adam’s hand files down from his face and looks at you. And you see something you thought you would never witness on Adam’s face. Pain. Adam is hurt. His mouth is slightly open, his breath suspended, his eyebrows knitted. You used to call him many names when you two argued. An asshole, a dirtbag, a dickhead, an irresponsible, immature jerk. But Adam never batted an eye. It’s the first time you see an unmistakable, terrible flash of pain in his face. You feel horrible. You sit up, your mouth open and about to say something. It’s hard to gather the right words after saying something so wrong. You extend a hand towards him, but Adam leans back, away from your touch.

“Adam fuck that’s not what I…” you say, voice shaky.

Adam shuffles away from you again, his face full of regret, embarrassment and clearly pain. He shakes his head, proceeding to get out of bed. He starts looking frantically for his clothes, putting them on as quick as he can. No words come out your mouth, your mind too confused and full of things to process. In just a matter of seconds, Adam is already dressed.

“I-I’m sorry, I gotta go” he stutters, looking at you for a split second.

“Adam, wait! I’m sorry I didn’t mean to sa-!”

You don’t have time to finish what you have to say. Adam had already opened the window of your room, and in the blink of an eye he flew away. Shit, shit, shit! Why did you even say that? That came out so wrong. But you couldn’t help it, you were so taken aback by his sudden confession. You mentally punch yourself in the face. Physically, you limit yourself to drag a hand down your face and groan loudly in your palm. You try to give yourself some time to think, you don’t want to hurt Adam even more. You spend some minutes with your face smothered in your pillow, suffocating sounds of pure frustration. After you gathered your thoughts together, you finally get up from the bed. You put your clothes back on, and head towards the still open window. With a strong flap of your wings, you sprint upwards. As you thought, Adam is sitting on the Hotel sign. He looks pissed. His lips are tightly pressed together and his eyebrows are knitted at the corners. He notices you but doesn’t look up.

“Adam, c’mon…” you say, as kindly as you can.

You keep floating in front of him, the wind generated by your wings making Adam’s hair slightly flow. He doesn’t look at you, he’s just staring at his own knees. For a solid minute you two don’t say anything. Silence has never been a thing between you and Adam, but you respect his wish. Suddenly, Adam breaks it.

“It’s not like you have to pity me” he mumbles.

“I’m not pitying you”

“Um yeah? I just ran off like a pissy school girl and here you are looking at me like a lost child”

“Adam-“

“You know how much time has passed since I last said those words?”

You don’t say anything. Adam finally looks up at you, his eyes a mess of emotions.

“Centuries” he says, spiteful of himself.

Your eyebrows arch upwards in surprise, your forehead corrugated. Your stomach burns, as you can finally feel every emotion Adam tried to hide under sarcasm for so long.

“Centuries?” you ask.

“Yeah, and I know I’ve been literally fucking around for a lot of time so it’s actually my fault, but I can’t say that I don’t mean it once I say it”

“Adam, my question was genuine”.

His mind stops in his tracks. You look weirdly calm. A bit unsure, of course, this is your first very serious conversation. But you’re still collected and he envies you.

“I really wanted to ask you what did you think you ruined. Because I’ll admit it, and I don’t wanna hurt you even more, but I don’t know what goes on in your head. We have all this sex, but also some care, but we also bicker. It’s confusing. I don’t even know if monogamy is your thing. But you showed me care. Sometimes, you still are a bit of a jerk let’s be honest. But I felt care too”.

Your stomach is twirling around, but you can’t stop your flow of consciousness. You wanna know what Adam means, what the First Man wants from a sinner he swore to hate not so long ago. Adam strokes his hair with a hand. His blush intensifies.

“I myself don’t really know what we are. If you know please fuckin’ tell me. What I know is that I feel something, love if that’s what we wanna call it. I mean, look at you! You sing along to rock songs with me, you know how to fight and look so badass while doing it, and you’re hot as fuck too! But if you don’t feel the sa-“

In a sudden movement, you zip towards Adam and grab him by his robe to push him on your lips. He lets out a muffled sound of surprise, but quickly closes his eyes to reciprocate the kiss. It’s calm, sweet, your lips and tongue are moving in tandem in such a tender yet passionate manner. It’s full of care, whatever it is. When you pull away, you look at each other in slight embarrassment. But you push it back immediately.

“I would have never thought I’d say it to you, but I do love you, Adam. Even if you’re still not perfect at all, you’re still a dickhead let’s admit it, I feel something for you. And I don’t expect you to suddenly become a better person just for the sake of being with me, but right now I’m sure I love you like this”.

You had blurted it all out in a single breath, still close to Adam’s face after your kiss. And finally, he smiles. Not with his usual teasing, shit eating grin. He smiles genuinely.

“I still don’t know if I’ll be a redeemable man, or if I want to become one. But at least with you I feel a bit of a better man”.

You smile back at Adam. He looks like a whole other person compared to how he was when you met. He still is his old self. But you came to love him. You and Adam lean forward, capturing yourselves in another deep, thoughtful kiss. Your wings meet, grazing each other as they close around you two. After a while of getting lost in your affection, you separate and playfully smirk.

“C’mon you whiny baby, why don’t we go downstairs to join everyone for movie night?” you suggest.

Adam groans and rolls his eyes “Us being a thing doesn’t mean that I have to participate in every fuckin’ activity of this Hotel”

“Uhh, yeah it does? I’m still in charge of forcing you to join. Now get your lazy ass off of there and let’s go”

“Okay, finee but can we have sex again after?”

“Of course we can”

“Hell yeah”

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel fanfiction #hazbin hotel x reader #adam #adam x reader #sinner adam #writers on tumblr #hazbin hotel adam fanfiction #hazbin hotel adam #adam x you #adam fanfiction #enemies to lovers #adam hazbin hotel #adam hazbin x reader #reader insert #x reader #vivziepop #hazbin hotel x you #adam x y/n

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kjdkive · 10 months

Text

it's always been you.

pairing: jungkook x reader (afab)

genre: slowburn, brother’s best friend

warnings: cursing, jungkook being so boyfie

summary: when you get stuck on a date with a total asshole and you need someone to pick you up who else are you gonna call in a new city where you only know your brother and his best friend.

a/n: if you actually like it, tell me if you want a part two cause im honestly thinking about writing one. and if you are gonna read it, you can tell me and i’ll put you in the tag list <3 and also you can always send me an ask if you have any idea for me to write. and also i got this from a “someone write this” tiktok but decided to put more of my stuff in it. if i find the user i’ll let you know

i hate men, i really do. i’ve been single for a while, for the same reason. don't get me wrong, men are really hot and sometimes smart, it's just my bad experiences with men that aren't helping. i moved to a new city for an internship and talking to my friends back home they convinced me to “put myself out there” that maybe “i’d find the one” as if i had time.

now that i think about it, i was so stupid for listening to them because now i’m here, stuck on a date with a total asshole i found on tinder. it was good at first, not gonna lie. i swiped right, we matched, he made sure to compliment me: call me pretty, beautiful, majestic even and we even had actual conversations. so i said “why not? what’s the worst thing that could happen?”

the date was going well... until it wasn’t. we were talking about what we wanted to do with our futures which is a total important question on a first date.

“i don’t know, i feel like if i get married i wouldn’t let my wife work, she has to take care of my kids, be grateful that i put food on her table and take care of me.” jisung, my date, said while trying to grab some pasta from his plate.

i was shocked, i thought he wasn’t gonna be like that. “what do you mean? your wife is not your mother to take care of you and kids are a two-person job.” i told him.

“oh god, don’t tell me that i just made angry your feminist heart.” he laughed “it’s true, though, what i’m saying. are you finished? let’s go back to my place.”

“i’m not finished actually, and back to your place?” i asked him.

“yeah, well, i paid for your food so the least you can do is go back to my place.”

oh, dear god. what have i gotten myself into? but i really was not in the mood to get in a fight with a man that won't understand why what he's saying is totally wrong.

“uhm, i’d like to ask for dessert.” i told him.

“but you'll have to finish it fast, i wanna go already.” he rolled his eyes.

i ordered a chocolate cake just to make time while i excused myself to the bathroom and called my brother for help. “why are men always like this?” i ask myself while dialing my brother’s number. it's either they’re mysoginists or they’re cheaters. last time i got a cheater now i got a mysoginist. wow me.

one ring, two rings, three, four, five… nothing. damn it. i call again, begging the universe for him to pick up the phone and come get me because i was scared to leave alone, i mean i am new in this city, i don't know the bad neighbourhoods and i am not too familiar with the public transportation here. also, this horrible guy was gonna be my ride back home but my brother doesn’t pick up and now i’m doomed.

“fuck you, taehyung, wherever you are.”

the only other person i knew in town was my brother’s best friend, who’s probably with him so i should call him because yeah that seems reasonable, right? but what if i bother him? what if he’s not with my brother and i called him for nothing?

"hello?" i hear a voice from the phone. apparently, i'm so stupid i dialed accidentally.

"hi, jungkook, how are you? it's y/n."

"hey, are you okay? is everything alright?" he asked, sounding more aware, more awake.

"uhm, yeah, just... i went on a date with this guy but he turned out to be an asshole and he was supposed to be my ride back home so i was gonna ask you if taehyung was there with you so he can come pick me up."

"text me the adress and don't move from wherever you are."

"jungkook, don't—" and the sound of him hanging up made me not finish my sentence.

i text him the adress and put my phone back in my purse again, wash my hands and go back to the table where i see jisung on his phone and a piece of chocolate cake in front of him. i sit down and start eating it, really slowly, trying to make time until jungkook come get me.

"can't you be faster? i told you i wanna leave." jisung asked me.

"well, you know already i am a slow eater."

as i am biting the cake i hear a voice behind me.

"let's go now."

i turned around and it's him, jungkook. his outift was not helping, or his voice, or his tattoos, or his piercings, or his hair for how handsome he looked right now. it had been a while since i had seen him, he had less tattoos and longer hair.

"y/n, what the fuck?" jisung asks angrily as we both stand up.

but as i am standing up and getting near jungkook, jisung tried to grab me from the arm. "do not fucking touch her, you hear me?" jungkook told him, while grabbing me from both arms gently and getting me to stand behind him. and jisung sat down, defeated, not giving it enough importance to make this a problem.

jungkook took my hand and also took me out of the place, making us both walk to his bike in the parking lot.

"jungkook, thank you and i'm so sorry for that, i just didn't know who else to call, i know no one here."

"you don't have to apologize and neither thank me, it's alright." he said, giving me a sweet smile as he put a helmet on my head.

"thank you."

"what did i just say?"

i laugh. "you're right. okay but..." i see him already sat on his bike "can you not go so fast, it's my first time getting on one of these and i'm kinda scared, not gonna lie." i ask him while sitting behind him, putting my hands around his waist.

"just enjoy the ride, doll, nothing to worry about."

he doesn't give me time to respond because he's already putting his foot on the gas (if that's what you say about bikes, because i have no clue how these ones work) and i'm already cursing him out.

i feel the air hitting the little part of my face the helmet is not hiding, and i let myself rest on jungkook, hugging him tight, resting my head on his back and feeling safe. well, now this wasn't so bad. we stopped at a red light and i felt his hands caressing my legs. it felt good, really good. i couldn't lie how much i was enjoying this, how much i didn't want this moment to be over.

"would it be so crazy if i ask you to go faster?" i ask him.

the light turns green and i feel the speed already. i let out a squeal as i hug jungkook even tighter. i felt so alive.

and then it was over.

he parked and we both got off the bike.

i try to take off my helmet and as soon as i do i feel a pair of hands over mine "you don't take it off like that, silly." jungkook giggles.

"my hair must be a mess." i said, as i try combing it with my hands.

"you're more than alright, y/n, don't worry." he tells me, while he also runs his hand through my hair giving me butterflies.

butterflies... what?

"well, thank you."

"you're more than welcome. but this is where i go back."

"don't you wanna come upstairs? have a drink or something with me. i haven't seen you in a year." that came out faster than expected and i don't know from where this courage is coming from. i'm not usally like this with jungkook, at the end he's not really my friend, he's my brother's.

he looks at his bike and then at me "uh, yeah, i'd love to."

"you got yourself a sweet appartment." jungkook tells me as soon as he enters and starts taking off his shoes.

"thanks, i got really lucky. you want some wine?"

"ew? you don't have beer?"

i grab him one and pour myself a glass of wine.

"god, i don't know why i went out with that guy, actually he seemed fine at first, you know?"

"and i could see from miles away that he was a dick, his posture, his vibe. i don't know how you didn't notice."

"well, i'm sorry, mr. vibes." i rolled my eyes, playing with him.

we get to talking, an actual really enjoyable conversation of what we were both doing here, how i was doing with my intership and him with his promotion on his corporate job at a really young age. we were both doing amazing, and we were having a really good time. and there was this feeling again, of not wanting it to be over. not once in our lives have we been alone, my brother was always there or just someone. we never got to do something alone even when we were younger and jungkook went to my house for dinner and my mom asked us to set the table so this was a new one. he also looked so handsome tonight, making those weird butterflies worse.

"i'm sorry, that was a really long story. but i've been wanting to thank you again for picking me up and saving me from that prick. i really needed that." i tell him while i get myself more comfortable on the couch. "i hope you weren't doing anything important and i interrupted you with my annoying problems."

"i was hanging out with some friends back at my place, actually." he says, while putting his head back on the couch, letting me see his neck and that little tattoo behind his ear.

"what? jungkook, oh my god, i'm so sorry i wouldn't have called you if i—"

jungkook laughs, standing up from the couch.

"are you going back to your place? god, i'm so sorry." i stand up with him.

"shut up." he laughs again.

"what? no, i mean it."

"shut up, y/n."

"what? why?"

"i did have some friends hanging out back at my place and yeah, i was busy." he starts, while walking slowly towards me "but that didn't matter as soon as you called me and told me you needed me. because whatever you need i'll run through heaven and hell to give it to you, walk the whole planet barefoot if you needed me to."

our faces are just milimiters apart from crashing into each other's.

"it's just because i'm your best friend's little sister." i tell him, almost whispering.

"no, it's you over your brother anytime." he grabs my face, his thumbs caressing my cheeks. "it's you, y/n, it has always been you."

i prepare myself for the kiss, a kiss that's going to change whatever dynamic we had for years. but there's no kiss, just a soft touch of his upper lip against mine.

"but we'll talk about it later, when you haven't come from a shit date."

he grabs his jacket and lets himself out of my appartment.

i want to say something back, tell him that leaving me like this it's unfair, but nothing comes out of my mouth, just my hand moving to my mouth trying to remember the lingering touch of him against me.

i was left there speechless.

#bts #bts fic #jungkook smut #jeon jungkook #jungkook drabble #jungkook fluff #jungkook #bts smut #bts fluff #bts x reader #bts jungkook #bts imagines #bts idol au #jungkook fanfic #jungkook i love you seven days a week #bangtan

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peachesofteal · 10 months

Note

i am running around in CIRCLES for the baby trap au. how does darling treat them after she figures it out??? i’m SO IN LOVE WITH THIS

I am running in circles for YOU, Keri, because I love you so! 🩵🩵🩵

Quick note: Every ask is like a fresh AU unless there’s a link. I posted one recently that had Simon basically tranquilizing Darling, that doesn't happen here. It's fun to explore every avenue for the baby trap au, and that's what I'll be doing with these asks, unless the ask is specifically referencing something.

18+ Minors DNI. Mature themes. Pregnant reader.

Dinner looked absolutely foul.

You'd almost, almost, feel bad for thinking it, if you weren't too preoccupied with the tampered birth control that you found in the bathroom drawer earlier. You'd almost feel guilty for sneering at Johnny's cooking, a meal you usually love, but you can't stop thinking about that little foil packet, with it's little sad beige pills all lined in a row, sitting harmlessly in the bathroom drawer, untouched for three months now.

Three months. The number is startling to you, the realization that you are actually three months pregnant with a baby. A small human. That you're growing. That you thought, was total accident. That you thought, was just an innocent occasion, something that happens, sometimes.

Surprise! It's not. It's not at all, if that perfectly pressed piece of foil had anything to say about it, the way it was already lifted from it's edge screaming at you like you were stupid.

And maybe you were stupid. Stupid to think these boys actually loved you, stupid to think they actually cared about you at all. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

You can't even rationalize it, this choice, this decision they made. Can't begin to understand it. How could do they do this? How could they decide this for you? Force this upon you?

Johnny clears his throat, expectantly. Like they're waiting on something, and you jerk your head up to glance at the two of them.

"Did ya hear me?" He asks and you shake your head.

"Sorry, uh I was thinking." Your fork pushes the potatoes around on the plate and he frowns.

"No appetite?" Bingo. You can play this off as morning sickness. It's not really lying, considering you feel sick to your stomach anyway.

"Not really."

"Can I make you something else?" He tries, and he looks so eager, so hopeful. So sweet. It confuses you. How could this man, this person that you love, do something so, so wrong to you?

"No, thank you." Simon cocks his head, and you try not to shake in the chair. Simon will know. He'll know something's up. He reads you too well.

"Something on your mind?" He asks, and you shake your head quickly. Too quickly.

"N-no. Just thinking about... baby stuff." Johnny brightens, so happily, like a fucking clam, and you can't help the scowl that crosses your face. They're so fucking happy. So happy, that they took your choice away. Took your autonomy. Like it didn't even matter.

The change in your attitude does not go unnoticed.

"Hey, what is it?" Simon presses, and your fingers tighten around the fork, edges digging into your skin until it bites.

"Nothing, for fucks sake." You hiss, unable to stop yourself, unable to put a damper on your emotions, or your mouth. "Can't I have my own thoughts every now and then? You don't have a right to everything I'm bloody thinking all the time, you know." Johnny freezes, like a deer in headlights, watching you warily while Simon visibly tenses, biceps flexing beneath his t shirt.

"Darling-" He tries, and his tone is truly remorseful. Like he's sorry for setting you off.

You let the fork clatter to the plate when he continues, cutting him off. He looks surprised, mouth slightly agape, while you stare at him from across the table. The air in the room is thick, stagnant with whatever is simmering under the current, whatever it is that's waiting to strike.

"I'm going to lay down." You announce, standing up from the table as fast as you can.

Too fast.

The room spins, and you lurch, before finding your balance, hand thunking against the table to steady yourself. Johnny's up out of his seat in a blink, his reflexes too fast, and he's got an arm around your waist to steady you.

"I've got ya." He moves to pull you into his side, to provide you support, but you blow out a breath and push away.

"I'm fine. Just tired." you don't snap, but the words are brusque, and he flinches. You've never refused his affections, or attentions, ever in the history of your relationship. You close your eyes to take a deep breath. "I want to lay down." He steps away, slowly, and you can feel their eyes on you as you walk into the bedroom.

You slam the door as hard as you can, and then lock it, for good measure. It won't keep them out, but it will give you some privacy for a little while, at least. Enough time for you to have another cry, before you have to face them, and what they've done.

#peaches asks #peaches writes #baby trap au #ghost x soap x reader #tw pregnancy #soap x ghost x reader

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semisolidmind · 5 months

Note

i know it's all about the lion's den AU rn and as usual I am FEASTING on the content (excuse the crumbs) but there's an idea that won't leave me alone-

what if Peaches was not human, but an immortal from the beginning? How much would change? I know the whole appeal of these AUs - I mean, that's why I love them and I absolutely love this lil corner of the fandom. but I've been kinda diving into the whole immortality biz in Chinese myths for my oc, so now I'm curious.

Peaches could be someone cultivating and practicing Xian (i hope I'm using that right) for years, or consumed pills/elixir of immortality somehow, or a demon who is oddly very kind and empathetic - would the bois still love her just as much? How different is the dynamic now even if Peaches retains her core personality traits?

love your work! and hydrate before ya diedrate

ive been thinking about this, and i kinda like the idea of immortal reader being an attendant of the heavenly peach orchard.

not super high up the ladder, but not at the bottom either. her powers are limited to helping plants grow just a little bit, creating temporary barriers, and being able to float the way all celestials can. the higher-ups figure that since no one is bold or stupid enough to steal from heaven, they don’t need any extra security in the immortal peach groves.

you can take a guess as to how reader meets the monkeys.

they show up to the orchards, ready to fight their way to the peaches, but instead of some overpowered celestial soldiers guarding the orchard, it's....one immortal maiden. just the one. but she doesn't seem all that powerful, soooooo...

...maybe she'd agree to let them take a few without too much trouble?

the monkey bros go the "oh don't mind us we're just a couple of cute lil monkeys, here to cause adorable and harmless mischief" route in their approach to getting reader to let her gaurd down.

they approach her while she takes a break from pruning some dead branches. she's understandably surprised and suspicious about these two seemingly normal monkeys who've snuck in, but... they are pretty cute. and tame; they let her pet them and give them scritches. perhaps they're one of the heavenly official's pets. reader supposes that they can stay for a while.

wukong and macaque play their parts, get reader's guard down, and steal a couple dozen peaches each. reader notices, but there's not much she can do beyond shooing the monkeys out with a broom (and her soft heart barely allows her to do that). she knows that if she reports it, those cute lil monkeys will be hunted down and killed.

she supposes she could put in a request for higher walls around the grove, or more barriers (she still wonders how the boys managed to get through the first ones), but with how slowly things get done in the bureaucracy...it'd be a very, very long time until it was even brought up in court.

besides, even then....they're monkeys. animals. she won't place blame on them for being what they are. those little cuties probably had no idea that the immortal peaches were any different from the ones on earth.

she could never stay mad at their adorable lil faces anyways.

---

reader, despite what you might think, has a pretty laid back job. once all her chores for the day have been completed (those magic trees don't really need much beyond the essentials to do their thing), she has a good amount of free time to sit and, you guessed it—read.

macaque (because of course, he has to be the first one to fall in every au) decides, on a bored whim, to go visit that nice attendant they stole from not too long ago. perhaps he'll collect some intel while he's up there.

he finds her after a bit of searching. reader sits in a secluded corner of the grove, leisurely turning pages and enjoying the shade. macaque, still disguised, sidles up to her. reader notices, seeming surprised to see him before her face morphs into... a rather adorable pout. perhaps she thinks she's being intimidating.

'damn, no wonder the bureaucracy didn't think they needed any more security,' macaque thinks sarcastically. such a fearsome maiden they've chosen to guard the immortal peaches.

while reader takes a minute to admonish him about stealing, it isn't long before she sighs and gives up on her lecture in favor of scratching him gently behind his ears. he churrs low in his chest. her whole demeanor is as soft and sweet as the peaches she guards (her hands as well, he notes, pressing into them).

macaque laughs internally. a fearsome maiden, indeed.

macaque manages to wiggle his way into reader's lap, pulling her attention from her book. she knows she should be trying to scare him off, but...just—just look at him! he's so cute, and she's too pulled in by how cute he is to notice the oddly powerful aura he seems to exude (far too powerful to be a normal monkey). he enjoys her touch for a while longer before he hears the far-off call of his annoying brother, wondering where he is. he bumps his head into reader's hand by way of goodbye before running off to shadow away more secretively.

reader watches him go, sighing. she really should shoo him away next time.

---

macaque keeps coming back. and reader continues to be unable to kick him out.

with very few visitors and no one else to talk to, reader begins to tell him everything that she overhears during the day; the officials don't think anyone is listening when they air out their gossip as they walk by the orchard. she doesn’t know it, but she’s saving macaque the energy of using his powers to gather this intel on his own.

the six-eared demon makes a habit of showing up to the grove to laze around with his favorite maiden and listen to her read, using “spying” as the excuse he gives his brother for why he's been running off so often. reader seems to have accepted that he won't be leaving her alone any time soon, and he takes full advantage. macaque comes to think of reader and the secluded corner of the grove as his own little peice of heaven.

of course, sooner or later, wukong joins in. he's a bit angry that macaque didn't just say he was visiting the peach orchard and it's attendant; he wouldn't have minded, he would've come with! macaque doesn't bother trying to explain that he didn't want to share.

but share he does, seeing as wukong greedily takes all the attention from reader he can get. the monkey king finds himself enamored with the maiden who's hands and heart are as soft as the fruits she tends to. he won't admit it (it may hurt his carefully crafted "ruthless demon king" image if he did), but wukong is a cuddle bug when it comes to reader. everything about her is just so soft, and she's so kind, and she always smells like peaches—he could spend hours laying on her chest as she reads.

he just feels so...peaceful, with her.

the boys are entangled in reader's life, visiting whenever they can and butting into whatever she happens to be doing. they see her day to day happiness (brief conversations with the lower maids she's friends with), and her struggles (the two monkeys bore witness to the officials taking their anger out on reader over something trivial, their rage towards heaven growing stronger). the two grow more and more attached to her as time goes on.

and so they begin to work a small abduction into the grander scheme of their plan.

---

sooner or later, the monkey warlords properly raid heaven. they and their demon army storm the jade palace, murdering servants, footsoldiers, and as many officials as they can. the monkey king and the six-eared macaque lead a massacre so bloody it stains the palace walls red. wukong especially holds back none of his rage, getting caught up in his hatred for heaven and zealously continuing to shed as much celestial blood as he can.

during a lull in the chaos, macaque, covered in vicera, makes his way to the immortal peach grove. with the battle coming to a close and the demon forces being driven back, now is as good a time as ever to snatch up a special “peach” for himself and his brother.

he finds said peach preoccupied with a gallant attempt at protecting herself and a few lower maids from a demon soldier, using a series of barriers. the soldier breaks the barriers almost as fast as reader can make them, rapidly pushing her and her companions into a corner. reader puts up a brave fight, but she's a celestial attendant, not a celestial warrior.

macaque calls out to the soldier, halting their attack and telling them to regroup with the others and prepare to move out. the soldier complies, crassly assuring the women that they’re about to be nothing more than bloody pulp on the garden wall. no one has ever gone against the shadow general of the demon army and lived.

macaque waits until the soldier is out of sight before leisurely approaching the still quivering group of maids and their determined, but exhausted looking guard. reader tenses as he steps closer. she feels a horrible sense of dread crawl down her spine when she gets a good look at him.

the dark fur, the shape of the mask marking on his face...reader feels tears start to bead at the corners of her eyes.

this entire time, she'd been petting and coddling the six-eared macaque. the second in command of the dreaded demon army has been sitting right in front of her and she had no idea. reader can barely keep her breathing steady.

and if this is her dark-furred companion, then the lighter-furred one must be…oh stars.

…she let the monkey king in.

she practically threw open the doors for him. she didn’t report them when she should have, she knew there was something strange about them but she was so sure they were just normal animals—oh stars above, if the jade emperor ever discovered this, she’d be executed.

but…but reader steels herself. she can deal with that later. her friends are counting on her.

now, she’s certainly not expecting the blood-covered demon general across from her to be open to bargaining (he could just kill all of them now, but reader gets the feeling he wouldn't be merciful enough to end it quickly). and he knows exactly what leverage he has over her, she can see it in the smug look on his face.

but she tries anyways.

“let them go, please,” she begs breathlessly, arms shaking from the strain of maintaining her magic. the least she can do is buy her friends a moment more. “do whatever you want with me, but they are blameless.”

macaque chuckles, the sound reverberating lowly between the trees. whatever he wants, huh? oh, sweet peach. she should know better than to give him so much leeway.

“that is tempting. if that’s the case, then perhaps you’ll go with me willingly,” he muses, tail swaying slowly. his fangs glint dangerously when he smirks.

“don’t fight, and no harm will come to them. that, and your secret will be safe with me. honest."

reader doesn’t believe him. she can’t, but she and her friends are so low priority that calling for help would be useless. if the demon army has been as effective as the screaming would lead her to believe, the celestial host has much bigger problems than rescuing a gardener and some lowly maidservants. and with the chance that she’ll be seen through and blamed for every gory death that's happened beyond the walls of the peach groves...

she doesn’t have a choice.

reader slowly, cautiously lowers her barriers, despite the worried cries of the maids behind her. they cower closer together as reader takes a slow step closer to macaque.

with a flick of his wrist, reader is struck by a sleeping spell so potent she falls into macaque's waiting arms like a lead weight. the demon gathers his beloved into his hold with a gentleness that doesn't fit his gory visage.

he sinks into a shadow, leaving the maids to clutch each other and cry at the loss of reader and the near loss of their own lives.

---

reader wakes up days later in the royal bedchambers of the stone palace. she startles at seeing the monkey king and the six-eared macaque laying on either side of her, stripped to just a loose pair of pants each. she herself has been changed to a comfortable silk robe, her own clothing nowhere to be seen.

reader feels a cold sludge in her gut. she scrambles out of the pillow pit, kicking a few into the face of one of her captors as she goes. she checks herself over, looking for bite marks, claw marks, anything to indicate the two demons sharing a bed with her had violated her in any way. she looks, and breathes a heavy sigh.

she finds nothing.

"we figured we'd wait until you were awake to start marking territory," the tired, yet still somehow smug voice of the monkey king chimes from behind her. reader turns to see the demon leveling an amorous look her way. his gold and crimson eyes burn like fire in the low light.

reader ignores him in favor of falling to her knees and burying her face in her hands. now that she has a moment to think, her failure has decided to take centerstage; she was the one who let the monkey king into the jade palace, she let him steal the immortal peaches, she's the one who carelessly shared all the gossip that told them when the best time to attack would be, she's to blame for all the lives lost—

"hey. y'know we would've raided heaven even if we hadn't met you, right? it's not your fault," macaque says, propping his head in his hand to look at her. he doesn't have the decency to hide how he's sizing her up, poison purple eyes glowing whilst tracing her curves. reader shrinks into herself a bit more.

"yep. don't feel too bad, peaches. i was never gonna spare any of those bureaucrats in the first place," wukong adds. "and besides, none of those guys cared about you anyway, so why feel bad?"

reader sobs, pressing her hands to her eyes. she knows. she knows how callous the officials could be, but that doesn't mean they deserved to die. it doesn't mean the servants and foot soldiers who were only following orders deserved their fates.

she hears movement, then feels a set of strong, furred arms wrap around her. wukong rests his head on her shoulder. he nuzzles his nose against her neck. she feels his warm breath and the glance of deadly sharp fangs when he speaks.

"they didn't deserve the mercy you seem to think they did."

---

wukong places a seal on reader's powers. what little defense she had against them is gone with the placement of a brand-like marking in between her shoulder blades (and a few more along her shoulders made with his teeth).

reader can't do anything. wukong won't let her leave, and even if she could, the heavenly court will have her executed if she goes back. so, she remains on the monkey king's mountain.

she didn't think she'd share a fate with the precious fruit she'd failed to protect.

#bad end wukong #twice as bad au #immortal peach au #i guess??? cause shes an immortal???#this got waaay longer than expected #got tired and couldnt figure out how to end it #dialogue is hard

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