#no one is doing well at all and it gets worse before it gets better hjgkhl | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

peachdues · 1 day

Text

COMPASS

bad boy!Sanemi • gang AU • NSFW

A/N: Peach?? Not having any self control when it comes to writing a fic?? It’s more likely than you think.

This was supposed to be a bad boy!Sanemi takes your virginity drabble that spiraled into a meta-analysis of Sanemi’s self hatred that then blew up into a fic with plot. All of those elements are still present but surprise!! Enjoy 24k words of my brain rot.

Inspired by @homo-homini-lupus-est-1701 ‘s wonderful meta analysis of Sanemi’s self hatred and his scars.

CW: 24k • explicit sexual content • MDNI • gang-related violence • mentions of blood and broken bones • mentions of murder/death • loss of virginity • creampie • vaginal fingering • some angst

I have plenty more of this AU written, so if y’all want more, just let me know 🫡

There are three rules to surviving life in the Corps.

The first is simple: once you’re in, you’re in.

Never outwardly confirm or deny rumors; let others talk, but don’t even think about opening your fucking mouth about the things you see or the whispers you hear.

And don’t be stupid enough to think you can cling onto any vestiges of your old life. There’s no splicing your life within the Corps with the one you’d had before. No separation. You’ve whored yourself to their cause, and for better or worse, you’re there until either someone important says otherwise or you end up in a morgue.

This is especially true for someone like Sanemi, so hopelessly entrenched within the organization that he’d allowed himself to be branded at the age of seventeen upon his ascension from rank-and-file street member to full-blown Hashira — the elite of the Corps, just short of the higher-ups who ran it.

The hot sear of iron between his shoulder blades had hurt like hell, but it was a welcome pain. A reminder that he’d not only outlived his father, but had actually made an impact, enough to be noticed and entrusted with more strenuous duties.

Each Hashira is assigned to a particular field. Uzui, silver haired, boisterous and extravagant, deals in bodies — mostly women, but men too, and he runs all of the strip clubs and escort services west of center city. Kocho, a child prodigy in chemistry, leads an intricate narcotics network.

And then there’s Sanemi: the debt collector.

Largely monetary debts — collecting on behalf of loan sharks, gambling debts, or that which is owed to his fellow Hashira, when their customers forget that there are no friends in business.

But the brand seared into his flesh has nothing to do with money — it is a reminder that above all, he is to ensure debts of another kind are paid.

Life debts.

In the three years since his initiation, Sanemi has only had to carry out this oath twice. Both had been scum, responsible for the deaths of innocents.

Their executions had been quick and without fuss — or much mess. A quick trip to an overpass abridging the Wisteria River. A march to the barrier in the dead of night, when no other cars were out and about to see or hear pleading sobs and bargains for their pathetic lives. A bullet to the head would quiet them, and Sanemi would let the rapids below take care of the clean up for him. Job done.

But even though the spray of their brains hadn’t touched him, their blood still stains Sanemi’s hands.

He will never be able to wash them clean.

But this is the life he chose, so Sanemi will endure the consequences — for the sake of his brother, the only living person on earth he gives a damn about. For whom he’ll do anything — be anyone — if it means Genya does not have to pick up a gun and sell himself to the very gang that owns his elder brother.

The second rule is simpler: no patterns. Patterns signal comfort and comfort may as well be a target on your back, begging for someone to come and take their shot (or several).

And finally, the third and arguably the most important rule, is don’t get attached. Keep your circle small so there’s less collateral to be used against you — against the organization that owns you.

This rule applies to both Corps members and civilians alike.

For the longest time, Sanemi Shinazugawa found Rule Three to be the easiest one to follow. He has his brother and no one else. His parents are dead; he has no friends beyond those in the Corps with him, and he knows better than to get overly invested in any of them. His inner circle is as tight as it can get.

But then he’d chosen your bookstore to hide in and that’s when everything falls apart.

“Fuckin’ Christ,” Sanemi mutters, anxious eyes tracking the large hand on his watch as it ticks the seconds by.

They were late.

The job was simple, and well within Sanemi’s capabilities. Maeda, a local dealer in stolen goods, had run up a sizeable bill at one of Uzui’s joints that he’d yet to pay. And while the slippery lech was quick to come sniffing whenever news spread that Iguro, a fellow Hashira, had managed to hijack a semi-truck full of luxury items, he was surprisingly difficult to connect with when it came time for him to pay for company he couldn’t get elsewhere.

He glanced down at his bruised, swollen knuckles and smirked. Sanemi couldn’t say he loved that his worth was measured in the number of bones he could break, or the amount of teeth he could punch out, but he’d be lying if he said he didn’t relish the chance to smash the pervert’s face in whenever the opportunity arose. Nor could he deny the rush of satisfaction he’d felt when he’d thrown open the steel door of the Maeda’s small office, crowbar in hand, and watched the snot-nosed pervert piss himself, stumbling over his words as he’d begged for mercy Sanemi hadn’t been hired to give.

The stupid, greasy fuck.

By the time he’d finished, Maeda had been little more than a quivering, helpless lump curled in on himself on the sticky, slate floor. His office had been left in shambles, drawers yanked out and emptied, only to be thrown aside (or cracked over the vermin’s back as he sobbed). But he’d had found the money, right down to the last dollar, just as he knew he would.

And that’s how Sanemi finds himself standing in the alley tucked behind Maeda’s small warehouse, Uzui’s payment split into two rolls that he’d shoved down into boots. All that was left was for the two junior Corps members he’d brought along for watch to bring the car around, and then they’d return to the abandoned factory that served as their headquarters.

Normally, this would have been a solo job, and Sanemi would already be on his bike, speeding off to safety. But he’d received an order to take along two, new Hinoe so they could get experience with higher level jobs.

Conveniently, his instructions had omitted the part the fact that the two lugs were utterly useless, bumbling idiots, contrary to what their recent promotions otherwise suggested.

Because neither of the two juniors are anywhere to be found. Nor is there any sound signaling that his getaway ride is approaching.

Sharp, lavender eyes scan the alley before him, but to his dismay, it remains empty — disquietingly so.

Leave it to a couple of rookies to set his teeth on edge.

Sanemi’s eyes drop down to follow the large hand of his watch as yet another minute ticks by. It’s been six minutes and their window had only allowed for four.

He knows how to be patient when the circumstances call for it, but now is not one of those times.

One minute, he decides, shifting his weight between his feet. They get one more fucking minute and then he splits —

A sudden screech of tires at the opposite end of the alley makes his stomach flip. Sanemi looks up just in time to see his escape car grind to a sharp halt, its rear jolting up as the driver slams on the brakes.

The passenger door flings open, and one of the Hinoe stumbles out, his feet barely connecting with the pavement before the car guns away, the side door flapping open.

The familiar howl of police sirens accompanied by distant shouts is enough for Sanemi to know this simple little debt collection has now gone tits-up.

“Pigs!” The Hinoe who stumbled out of the getaway car calls to him. “Pigs!”

“Shit,” Sanemi growls. No doubt Maeda’s bruised ego sold them out. He should’ve taken the time to smash the asshole’s phone.

He’ll be dealt with later — and with relish. But right now, Sanemi needs to get the fuck away.

Part of following Rule Three means not worrying about your fellow comrades when the cops come. None of them are stupid enough to actually risk talking to law enforcement about the Corps’ operations, but the fewer of them who get caught, the better.

So Sanemi takes off, adrenaline pumping fast and jot in his veins as he hears the swine behind him split off. He can’t be sure, but he can make out two, maybe three pairs of footsteps trailing behind him.

He scowls; shaking one cop is a breeze; having to shake off three is a bitch.

He hurtles over a pile of wooden crates and shoves a stack of delivery pallets over behind him as he runs, darting down random alleys and side streets that he knows will eventually lead him to a safe house.

The backstreet he shoots down is a fork, but only the path straight through will lead him to a rust yard of abandoned warehouses and shipping containers that Sanemi knows like the back of his hand. He could lose them there, could vanish between freights and wait the bastards out, and once clear, he could slip back into the district marking the outer territory of the Silo and get back home.

Iron pumps hotly in his veins. Almost there, almost there —

A car skids to a stop at the end of the middle ting of the alley, police lights flashing and alarms blaring.

No good.

“Fuck.” It isn’t the end of the world, but the blocking of the alley meant he had to reevaluate his escape. While he’s familiar with the path now obstructed by the police cruiser ahead, he hadn’t the chance to fully scope out his only other two options — the side streets to the left and right.

Without much thought, Sanemi darts sharply left and prays to whatever deity is listening that he hasn’t fully fucked himself.

Only one shop remains open; a tiny hole in the wall, tucked in between two old apartment buildings at the end of the street — one that borders the city’s western wing.

It’ll have to do, he decides, especially as the police sirens grow louder with each passing second.

He explodes through the front door, wide eyed and panting. Vaguely, it registers to him that this is a bookshop — a thankfully empty, cluttered bookshop.

But his abrupt arrival does reveal that the shop is not totally empty. There is one other — the store’s lone employee, who startles out of her seat behind the clerk’s counter, nearly knocking over a small cup of coffee.

He regards her for a moment, and she him, with matching expressions of wariness and shock at the presence of the other.

Behind him, the police sirens grow louder; more urgent.

It’s now or never. And, because he’s desperate enough to try, he risks a move he knows better than to take.

“You got someplace I can hide?”

——-

You blink, stunned as you stare at the frantic, pleading man anxiously looking between you and the door behind him.

His name registers dimly in the back of your mind. Here. In your store. And, evidently, on the run, if the distant echoes of police sirens growing steadily closer to your store is any indication.

Sanemi Shinazugawa.

You know him; you’d known him most of your life, even if you’d never spoken to him. You’d gone to the same school in your youth — all thirteen years of it, in fact. He’d been an abrasive loudmouth in the hallways, but a quiet, even polite boy in the classroom.

You know he’s from the Silo — a worn down, derelict part of the City that housed only the poorest residents. A cruel nickname meant to mock the poverty of its population.

But the Silo was also well known for being the epicenter of operations for the notorious group known only as the Corps.

It was the Corps who owned a majority of the City, its reach extending from the Silo, through the West and East wings, and all the way into Midtown. And, as was the case with most leeches, the Corps relied on the most desperate and hungry to carry out its biddings, offering some level of protection and security for the poor souls who needed it most.

Hence, its presence in the Silo.

So you hadn’t been surprised when you’d heard Sanemi had joined the Corps. Most kids from the Silo did; what had surprised you were the rumors that he became a high-rank member by the ripe age of seventeen, before he’d even graduated high school.

You shudder to think what he had to have done — what he’d become — in order to achieve such status and notoriety.

If he’d been anyone else, you wouldn’t have helped; you would’ve screamed, alerted the police to his presence, maybe even outed him as a suspected Hashira.

But you owed him.

Years ago, before either you or your siblings could drive, you all relied on the city bus to get to and from school.

But one afternoon, when you’d had to stay late for a club meeting, your little sister accidentally got on the wrong bus. Rather than being dropped safe and sound a block away from home, she’d ended up in a bad part of town that just so happened to have been the stomping grounds of the scowling delinquent now shoved under your cabinet, contorted between boxes of blank receipt rolls and stacks of returns.

Had anyone else found your sister, there would be no telling what would have happened to her. The Silo was not a place known to be kind to lost little girls.

But it was Sanemi who discovered her, sniffling and red-faced at the dilapidated bus stop. And though he’d been nothing more than a scrawny ten year old, he’d put your sister on his back and carried her not just the six miles back to safe part of town, but the additional two that led right to the front doorstep of your parents’ home.

You’d watched him curiously from the stairs as your parents profusely thanked your sister’s white-haired savior. They’d offered Sanemi dinner, or at least some sort of reward for his efforts, but he’d only waved them off, briskly telling them it was “no big deal.” As though carrying a six-year-old nearly eight miles was par for the course, as far as he was concerned.

His eyes had flitted over to you once during the exchange, briefly lingering before he turned and left, a single hand held up in casual farewell.

You’d been ten at the time. And now, here you are, twenty years old, running a shabby bookstore, and the opportunity to pay him back has finally arrived. The chance to show your gratitude for sparing your sister of a fate he himself, had not been able to escape.

Quickly, you motion him to you and without explanation, you cram him under the clerk’s counter, holding the cabinet door shut with your knee just as the police burst through the store entrance.

There are three of them, and they do not bother announcing themselves to you. Instead, they begin to prowl through your aisles, flashlights out and guns drawn while they comb the quiet corners of the store, searching for signs of anything that did not belong; anything misplaced.

A bead of sweat slides down the back of your neck, but you keep your face and your stance casual. Below the counter you cross your fingers, hoping and praying that the criminal stuffed inside your cabinet isn’t stupid enough to try and shift.

One officer rounds back into the main part of the store and locks in on you, stiff and anxious behind the counter.“You haven’t seen anything suspicious?”

“I’m sorry, sir. I don’t know what you mean.”

The cop grimaces. “You haven’t seen anyone who looks out of place? Maybe seems like they’re running?”

You feign an easy, sweet smile, even as the leg holding the cabinet door shut begins to tremble. “I’m afraid you’re my first customer of the day, sir.”

The officer grumbles under his breath something along the lines of not your customer, but he questions you no further. He only waves to his comrades and the three of them shuffle out through the door, one muttering into the walkie strapped to his shoulder.

Several moments pass, tense and thick. The silence is broken only by the sound of your heart hammering against your sternum. You remain still, fingers curled tight against the counter’s edge listening for any sound signaling the cops have returned, that their stiff departure had been a ruse to lull you into a false sense of security, as they waited for you to reveal your deception.

But all remains quiet. And you cannot stomach the silence any longer.

“They’re gone,” you mutter, finally moving aside to let the cabinet door below you swing open.

There’s a faint thumping and a few, muffled curses as the scar-speckled fugitive unfolds himself and spills free from the under-cabinet.

In a way, Sanemi still resembles the boy of your memories. His eyes and hair have always been distinctive: a shocking contrast of violet framed by thick, dark lashes that do not match the mop of silvery-white atop his head. But it’s the faint scowl he wears as he stands, the tinge of annoyance that tugs at the corners of his mouth, that scrunches his pale eyebrows, that feels familiar.

That expression, a portrait of vague irritation with the world around him, was one you came to know well — at least, at a distance. One that remained constant even as you grew; his default.

However, it is still not nearly as memorable as the shy embarrassment that had turned his cheeks slightly pink, had made him cast his eyes down as your parents showered him with gratitude.

But that earnest bashfulness is nowhere to be found now.

He wears a patterned, short-sleeved button down. Though rumpled and a tad dirty, you suspect the top three buttons were left open intentionally, rather than being the product of whatever scuffle he’d found himself in before he decided to make it your problem.

You try not to linger on the very obvious hint of the well-defined muscles revealed by his open collar. Nor do you let yourself consider the bulging mass of his biceps as he runs a hand through his cornsilk hair.

He has scars he’d not had in your youth — jagged, silvery lines that cut halfway across his cheek and forehead. Yet their presence does not dull his good looks.

A scrawny ten year old no longer; Sanemi Shinazugawa is now tall and roguishly handsome. But his infuriating good looks aside, your debt to him has been repaid; now, he needs to get the fuck away.

“Can’t thank ya enough,” he shoots you a devilish smile as he straightens his shirt. “You really saved my ass —“

“Get out of my store.” You order, your voice hard. “Take your trouble somewhere else and leave me out of it.”

Sanemi’s eyes narrow at your use of the word trouble, but he says nothing. Instead, he only rounds the counter with a loping, infuriating swagger, his hands shoved in his pockets.

“As you wish, Princess,” and you bristle at the sarcasm dropping from the word. He pauses to scan the shelf marked New Releases. “Just need somethin’ for the road.”

He snags a small novel — a fantasy story, judging by the cover - and he tucks it under his arm.

“Later,” he calls, waving a lazy hand over his shoulder.

You stare after him, slack-jawed and incensed. “You have to pay for —“

But the door bangs shut behind him, and Sanemi Shinazugawa disappears into the night.

—-

By the time Sanemi returns to his shabby apartment, it is well after midnight. He’d met up with Uzui and forked over Maeda’s payment. Though, the Corp’s head pimp hadn’t been particularly pleased that his money rolls had been shoved deep down in his boots, his nose wrinkling as Sanemi dropped the crumpled, slightly damp wads of cash into his waiting, magenta-nailed hands.

As it turned out, Maeda hadn’t sold them out. Rather, one of the Hinoe had stupidly gotten into a scuffle with some brash, young teenager and in his anger, pulled his gun on the kid.

Right in front of two, marked cop cars.

One of the idiots had been caught and cuffed, and was now spending his evening locked in the damp, cold jailhouse pending bond. The other — the driver — had managed to escape, though he’d been carted off to Iguro for punishment.

There’s a reason he prefers working alone, he thinks bitterly as he kicks his boots off. He fucking loathes incompetence.

He pulls his gun free from its place in his waistband and sets it gently atop his ratty kitchen table. Sanemi then trudges over to his futon, collapsing heavily on it with a groan. A shit day, he decides, pulling the stack of cash he’d received as his cut for the job free from his pocket, thumbing through it. A shit day with shit juniors.

He shifts against a lump that sits under his ass. Frowning, he reaches into his back pocket and pulls out the book he’d swiped from your store and turns it over in his hands. Surprisingly, it has managed to remain in pristine condition despite its rather unceremonious storage in his pocket.

Your face flashes in his mind, but before he can fully appreciate it, your words echo in his ears.

Take your trouble somewhere else.

Sanemi scowls, tossing the book onto his coffee table, annoyed. The implication underlying your use of trouble and the venom with which you’d spoken it is a thorn in his side he cannot ignore.

You know what — who — he is. In Sanemi’s world, that’s a liability.

Though, in fairness, he can’t really be surprised that you do. Gossip is a free commodity in this town, and it’s a coveted one. It wouldn’t be a stretch to conclude that you’d overheard one of the rumors about him and his ties to the Corps.

What concerns him is he doesn’t know what your connection is, if any, to his world. Maybe you’re really just a girl in a bookshop who paid back a decade-old favor.

Or maybe you’ve got an in with them.

The Corps isn’t the only gang operating within the city; there is another, crueler and far more violent that had arisen west of the Silo.

The Kizuki.

In the last six months, the Kizuki have managed to overtake the Western Wing, nearly expanding their reach into center city.

Their takeover had been swift; practically achieved overnight, following the systematic execution of every known Corps members in the area. And their violence hadn’t been limited to active members; the Kizuki had brutally maimed and murdered anyone tangentially connected to those Corps members.

Neither women nor their children were spared. And now, it seemed the Kizuki had set their sights on the Silo.

There are whispers that they’ve expanded into their operations into the neighborhood adjacent to the one in which the bookstore sits. That alone is enough to make Sanemi suspicious — perhaps you’re in league with them, and you’ll hand him over the moment it’s most convenient for you to do so.

Admittedly, that theory seems doubtful. You’re a bookseller. Not the kind of girl he knows is prone to becoming involved with the seedy underground world of organized crime. And your apparent disdain for him and his trouble only supports that theory.

But that’s an assumption, and in his line of work, assumptions are precarious; risky. Too much so for comfort.

Either way, he doesn’t know, and that uncertainty is a breeding ground for the parasite that is doubt. Toxic enough that were it to take root in his brain, his judgment could be compromised, leading him to mistakes he can’t afford to make.

Sanemi doesn’t tolerate blind spots. He will keep you on his radar until he determines the threat you pose and once he knows its severity, he’ll decide how to proceed.

He eyes the book he’d swiped from your store. He likes reading, though he hasn’t had much time for it lately (or, ever). But, if he’s going to hang around you while trying to identify the threat you pose, he might as well have a strategy for getting you to talk.

Sighing, he grabs the novel from his table and thumbs to the first page as he pads into his kitchen, in search of something to quell the grumble in his stomach.

—

His inquiries into you and your life reveal shockingly little.

You work at a bookstore. Your parents sold off your childhood home and retired to some beach down south. Your siblings are spread out across other cities and don’t visit home often, if ever.

Only you remain, abandoned by your family to fend for yourself in a crumbling city with only a shabby bookshop that sits on the furthest end of an otherwise safe street to keep you busy.

Truthfully, the bookstore probably is more interesting than you, at least on paper. But it’s that dirge of information that piques his interest; makes him look at you more as a mystery worth unraveling.

Besides, the smart thing for him would be to keep a tab on you until he can confirm you are in fact, as boring as you appear.

Or so he tells himself.

The image of a ten-year-old you peering at him from your parents’ stairwell flashes through his mind once more.

He’d felt your gaze burning a hole into his head, and shyly, he’d looked back at you, only to find himself unable to look away. Only your mother’s prodding about him joining your family for dinner had broken your temporary enchantment over him.

The memory of how you’d looked at him — a mixture of curiosity and awe highlighted by a faint blush in your cheeks when he’d met your stare head on — remained fixed in his brain for years after.

And though the two of you never spoke, you always smiled at him whenever you locked eyes in the school hallway or cafeteria. A real, genuine smile.

He wonders if he ever smiled back and finds himself irritated that he can’t remember if he had. He should’ve; especially now when it seems as though he’s unlikely to ever see that gentle, radiant smile again.

Sanemi’s phone pings and all thoughts of you come to a screeching halt. The message that flashes on his screen — instructions, only by way of an address and an amount — chase away the images of you and your sweet smile, like a hand scattering smoke.

With a sigh, Sanemi dials the number for two, lower-ranked Corps members to serve as scouts. With watch secured, he shoves his phone into his pocket and runs a tired hand over his face.

He wonders what will kill him first — whether it will be a bullet or whether it will be because there’s nothing left of him to whore out on the Corp’s behalf.

Ultimately, he knows it doesn’t really matter. He won’t die as himself; as Sanemi, the boy from the Silo who wants a life that’s anything but this. He’ll die only as Shinazugawa the Hashira. He’ll die under the mask he’s forced to wear so often, he wonders if it hasn’t yet bonded with his skin.

But as long as he remains in one piece, he must continue on as a puppet in this this tedious show. So, Sanemi grabs his gun from where he’d placed it on atop the cheap plastic of his kitchen table and he tucks it into his waistband.

And by the time his apartment door slams shut behind him, Sanemi has slipped the mask down over his face, and he is Shinazugawa once more.

—

Two weeks pass before he ends up back in front of your bookstore.

Sanemi doesn’t really remember how he got here. He awoke well before sunrise to his phone chiming with orders that he go collect on a sizeable gambling debt owed by one of Iguro’s regulars, an owner of some pawn shop.

The sun was already high overhead when he finally left the pawn shop, knuckles bruised and arm aching. He’d kicked his bike into gear in a familiar daze, one that always slipped over him after he completed a job. A kind of numb quiet that settled into his bones, a dull static in his brain that did not fade until the tremor in his hands subsided.

That paralysis needs to be broken. Contrary to popular belief, desensitization was not an ideal state of being for someone like him. It made him apathetic and careless to the world around him, and that was little better than painting a giant target on his back, begging his enemies to come and do their worst.

So, when the numbness still lingered by the time his bike roars past a rusted water tower that marks the outer limit of the Silo, Sanemi knows of only one cure. His go-to.

His bike is still hot by the time he lifts his phone to his ear, just outside his shithole of an apartment.

He doesn’t know her by name — only by description, as told by the series of emojis that accompany her number on his phone. But it’s surprisingly easy to charm her, though perhaps that’s because she’s looking for an escape just as much as he is.

Less than ten minutes later, the girl pulls up beside him in the parking lot.

Her hands are already roaming down his chest and playing with the buckle on his belt as Sanemi unlocks his door and pushes her inside.

At some point between the front door and his bedroom, the girl has stripped herself of her outer clothing, leaving her only in her undergarments as she tugs Sanemi down by his neck and into her kiss. She’s licking and nipping at his lips in a way he’s not sure he likes, but he allows it because his cock is painfully hard and throbbing where it strains against his pants.

And, after all, he’s the one desperate for relief.

“I’ve only got ten minutes,” she warns, kicking off her underwear as she falls back onto his bed. Sanemi only smirks as he slides his hand down the length of her leg, gripping her by the ankle and flipping her to her stomach.

He shifts away long enough to quickly wiggle free of his pants. He grabs a condom from his nightstand and rips the foil with his teeth. Fingers toying with the girl’s clit as she moans into his mattress, Sanemi rolls the latex down his cock. Protection secured, he reaches for her again, yanking her by her hips until her backside is flush against him. One hand pushes down between her shoulder blades while the other snakes up her neck, and Sanemi nudges the tip of his cock up against her entrance.

“Don’t worry, darlin’,” he winds the long tresses of her hair around his fist and gives her a sharp tug. “We’ll be done in five.”

—-

Even an hour after he tossed the girl her clothing and not so casually suggested she leave his apartment, Sanemi still feels restless.

He cannot shake the images of the afternoon from his mind, and so, Sanemi resorts to walking.

He does so without thought as to destination or the rapidly setting sun. Sanemi only focuses on the activity itself. One foot in front of the other; pace even and quick, each step accompanied by a flash of that day’s sins.

The crash of a garage door as it slammed back against the wall. Wide eyes that quickly filled with panic at the sight of him and the flash of metal tucked against his hip.

Step.

A plea; a desperate promise to pay, one that he’d heard a thousand times from a thousand different mouths. None of them ever seemed to understand their word wasn’t worth shit when they’d already defaulted on their obligations. Yet still, they begged.

Step.

The breaking of teeth beneath his fists.

Step.

The crush of bone under the iron pipe he’d found discarded on the garage floor. The agonized futility of trying to scoot back and away from him, despite a shattered leg.

Green; the color of the money he’d found stashed in a duffel, the debtor’s desperate attempt to hoard the wealth owed to the Corps.

Step. Step. Step. All the way down the street leading until he finds himself on a distantly familiar stretch of pavement that ends at the bookstore’s front steps.

For a moment, he lingers outside the shop, hesitant. He should turn around; there is no reason for him to be here. His investigation into you is not a priority by any means, especially where whatever poking he has done has revealed so little.

The book he lifted from the New Releases shelf is tucked carefully in his jacket pocket. He doesn’t know why he’s carried it around with him, all this time. Sanemi finished the novel the very night you’d helped hide him from the cops.

He should leave; but then his feet carry him up the walk leading to the store, and he’s pushing the door open.

His arrival is punctuated by a cheerful ring of the old bell nailed above the door. At first, the store appears deserted; but then you pop up from under the counter, surprise coloring your features.

That surprise melts quickly into cold disdain that makes something in his chest flutter as he strolls toward you. With every step, that numb haze of his disperses and instead, Sanemi feels himself returning to normal the closer he brings himself to you.

“This isn’t a library,” you chide when he plops his borrowed novel back down on your counter. “You have to pay for the books here.”

It’s incredible how easily he is able to slip back into the skin of the suave, smug playboy, and your adorable glare only makes him smirk. “I brought it back, didn’t I? Look — didn’t even crack the spine.”

“It doesn’t matter,” you reply coolly, snatching the book up and tossing it on a small cart marked Restock. “That loss came out of my paycheck — which is scant enough.”

That piques his attention. “Didn’t you say this was your store?”

His question makes you turn pink, and you’re quick to put your back to him, pretending to shuffle through new releases waiting to be shelved. “I work here,” you mutter quietly, but when you turn back around, you stick your chin out, defiant. “But I am the only employee, so it is my store, in a sense. The owner doesn’t ever come by.”

You wrinkle your nose. “So yes, lost profits affect me, and me alone, you thief.”

Sanemi cocks his head, his eyes running over you in consideration.

You’re beautiful; he’s always found you cute, even as a kid, but the transition between your teen years and adulthood have been kind. Even if you’re glaring at him like you would a crushed bug stuck to the bottom of your shoe.

But your words strike a chord in him. His job is to collect money from those greedy lowlifes who waste it; who use money to carry out their bad deeds, who use it to fuck over others.

He doesn’t take it from those who need it; from those who are barely scraping. by. Sanemi knows the agony of having to choose between keeping the lights on or feeding a hungry stomach far, far too well.

“Fine, here,” he tosses a random novel on your counter and a crumpled twenty dollar note. You ring him up, eyes flicking up to glare at him every so often as you count out his change.

He only continues to watch you, the heat of his stare ignites an itch under your skin that makes you squirm.

Your restlessness boils over. “What?”

“Nothin,” he shrugs. “Just think it’s interesting that you of all people are still lingering in this shit hole.”

Your head snaps up, your task of totaling out his change forgotten. “I live here, idiot.”

He snorts. “Didn’t you want outta here? Do somethin’ different?” He leans forward, elbows propped on your counter as he rests his chin on his fist.

“I don’t see how that’s any of your business.” He’s dancing dangerously close to a sore spot of yours — that you are alone in your hometown, working at a failing bookshop, with no one and nothing to justify your stagnancy.

“This can’t be your dream life.”

You don’t have to answer; you know that. But his line of questioning is puzzling. Because, no matter how casual he manages to keep his tone, his nonchalance is betrayed by his eyes, sharp and inquisitive.

Like he’s waiting to dissect whatever answer you give him.

Sanemi continues. “It’s strange for people not to want for more — to not dream about somethin’ different.”

“And who are you to say I don’t?” You bristle, slamming your cash drawer shut with more force than necessary. “I have a dream of my own. Just because it’s not one you would pick for yourself doesn’t mean it’s wrong.”

He blinks, taken aback. “Woah, woah, I never meant any offense.” He pushes back from the counter. “My bad.”

His response feels genuine but your ego is already bruised. Stiffly, you finish counting out his change and drop it into his waiting palm.

You slide his book across the counter. “Have the day you deserve.”

His surprise morphs into amusement at your iciness. So haughty, he winks. “You too, Princess.”

You turn aside in clear dismissal. He makes a show of taking out his wallet and stuffing his change inside, but your pointed ignorance of him means you don’t see him toss another note on the counter.

He’s already halfway out the door when you call after him, urgent. “Sir, you dropped your —“

“Nah, I didn’t,” he raises his hand in farewell as the bookstore door bangs shut behind him, leaving you to stare open-mouthed after him.

Clutched tightly in your hand is his crisp, one hundred dollar note.

—

His next visit is unplanned, but not in the way that Sanemi avoids routine. It’s unplanned in that he’s annoyed and it’s partially your fault, so that means the onus is on you to fix it.

You’re in the process of double checking delivery logs to ensure all your new inventory has arrived when a large thud against the clerk’s counter startles you.

You frown. It’s him again — all ivory hair and silvery facial scars that somehow are less imposing than the irritated scowl he wears.

“This book was shit,” he scoots the novel across the counter to you with distaste. “I want a refund.”

You level his pout with a frosty glare of your own. Wordlessly, you lean over the counter and tap a single finger against a laminated sign duck-taped to its edge.

Return-exchange only. No refunds.

“But it was shit,” he repeats, as though that will somehow spur you to change a policy you didn’t create. “You let me waste twenty bucks.”

“I did nothing,” you rustle the pages of your delivery log in pointed dismissal. “You’re the one who decided to buy a book before checking it out.”

You glance down at the discarded novel. “Figures,” you scoff. “He’s not even an author. He uses ghost writers and takes all the credit.”

“Woulda been nice if you’d told me that before you let me give him my money.”

You hum idly as you cross off the log’s boxes for new releases. “I suppose I was too stunned that you even knew how to read. Guess I wasn’t really paying attention to your shit choices.”

“Oh?” And you glance up to see Sanemi smirking at you. “The Princess has claws, does she?” He leans against the counter, propping his cheek under a loose fist. “So, what are your recommendations, gorgeous?”

“I’m not your Princess,” you snap imbuing the nickname with as much venom as you can muster. “Call me by my name or call me nothing at all.”

His eyes drop to your name-tag, pinned neatly on the front of your sweater. That insufferable smirk of his only widens. “Alright, alright. What are your recommendations, Y/N?”

The syllables sound rich and honeyed and suddenly, you wish you’d let him stick with Princess, as grating as it was.

Because your name should not sound so sweet, should not roll off his tongue so seamlessly, as it just did.

You’ve never been one to indulge in rumors. But in this city, as economically fractured as it is, gossip is a currency everyone keeps in their back pocket. And though you keep your head down and mind your own business, even you have heard the rumors swirling around town about the eldest Shinazugawa child.

Rumors that he has ascended the ranks of the same Mob that claimed the life of his deadbeat father long before the bastard was shived in the back for a debt he’d owed (their words, never yours).

Rumors that he holds a unique position within the gang, known clandestinely only as the Corps, and that position requires him to do things most won’t speak about.

But the rumor that screeches to the forefront of your mind has nothing to do with his alleged status with the Corps. It’s his reputation as a flirt; a rumored womanizer, through and through, that is a splinter under your skin.

Determined to pick him out, a wicked idea blossoms. “Fine, here.” You stalk purposefully to the section marked Literature. Your finger drags down a line of titles before finally settling on one. You pull it free with a soft grunt, the book sitting thick and heavy in your hand as you dump it into Sanemi’s.

“Read that.”

His eyes flick between its cover and you, incredulous. “This ain’t a book; it’s a brick.”

“It’s a classic,” you counter. “One that examines age-old question of destiny versus free will, generational curses.” Your head cocks to the side, a challenging smirk tugging at the corner of your mouth. “Love and lust.”

His eyebrow raises and you cross your fingers. If he falls for it and ultimately ends up hating the book, then perhaps he’ll decide your taste in reading material is indeed shit, and maybe then he’ll leave you alone.

Sanemi considers you for a moment but then he takes the bait. “If you say so,” he sighs. “But if it’s shit, I’m taking my refund.” And then he leans in close, so close that you can feel the warmth radiating off his body.

His breath is hot against your ear. “Regardless of your shitty little policy.”

You refuse to let him see how much he’s knocked you off-kilter. “So I can expect to be robbed? Will it be at gun or knifepoint? Just so I’m prepared.”

His chuckle, low and dark sends goosebumps skittering down your arms. “Worse,” he promises before he draws back. His grin is wolfish, all teeth and feral hunger. “You’ll owe me a date.”

He looses a low, appreciate whistle as he steps back and takes his eyes over your rigid form. “Though, I might just take you out anyway.”

“You assume I’ll say yes — or are you planning on kidnapping me? I’m sure you’re rather proficient at it, given your occupation.”

Something dark flashes across his face, and it’s enough to make you step back, a sudden fear creeping up the back of your spine.

Stupid, you chastise yourself. You never know when to keep your mouth shut.

But the shadows in his features recede as quickly as they appeared, and Sanemi’s mouth eases back into that same, cocky smile.

“You’ll say yes, Princess. You won’t be able to resist the temptation.”

“Temptation?” You force out a laugh. “And what makes you think I can’t?”

Sanemi’s eyes find your current read, open flipped over on the counter, marking your current page.

It’s a mystery novel. Your third of the month, born of a new hyperfixation on the genre.

You want nothing more than to wipe that smug grin of his clean from his face. He gives an affectionate snake of his head as he turns and makes his way toward the door. “Habits, Y/N. It all comes down to habits.”

You should throw it at his head, but Sanemi exits the store before your hand can find its spine.

——-

Over two weeks pass without so much as a whisper from the enigma that is Sanemi Shinazugawa.

Loath though you are to give him that sort of credit, you cannot deny that he utterly confounds you. He is everything you expected while simultaneously nothing at all what you’d imagined. He is brash and cocky, and he struts around with an insufferable self-importance that can only come from years of being at the top of his game (no matter how he got there).

Yet, he also reads. Enough to have opinions, even decent ones, about certain authors, and he’s open minded enough to accept your recommendation even if it feels as though he has an ulterior motive for doing so.

And, he’d been bothered by the dock in your pay as a result of his mischief; so much so, that he’d slipped you more than enough to make up the loss. That is the action that puzzles you the most, even weeks later. You’d assumed that someone like him, so used to ensnaring people into various schemes, wouldn’t have given two shits if he’d stolen money from some broke girl at a bookstore. After all, his business was all about money — and the lengths some would go to keep it.

Yet he’d paid you back — paid you more than you needed, if you were honest.

Since that day, you’ve had your ears tuned to any mention of his name, any whispers of the mysterious, scarred gang-member who has occupied nearly all the open space in your head. You’ve managed to glean small things here and there. That he’s a Hashira, and Hashira means he’s only one step below what is known ominously as the Master Family — the heads of the entire organization.

That he’s rather feared, even among seasoned Corps members; that he’s known for his swift brutality.

That he’s more than just a flirt; he’s a virile lover. Not picky in the slightest about who warms his bed, though no one has ever been able to pin him down longer than a handful of one-night stands.

You stop poking around after that particular revelation, embarrassed that you now know exactly what makes him so popular.

Apparently, his flexibility pairs well with his near inhuman stamina. And he’s said to be very well-endowed.

It’s more information than you care to know, but you can’t deny that your curiosity lingers.

You brush aside your inquisitiveness as nothing more than a natural side effect of your own inexperience. And you’ll be damned before admitting that your interest in Sanemi Shinazugawa isn’t limited to rumors of how good he is in bed. That, perhaps your curiosity stems from something deeper, from a desire to know if that bad boy persona is authentic or a mere facade, and boy on the stoop still lurks somewhere beneath his mask.

—

“You look like shit.”

You startle up from where you’d been resting your head on your arm, wavering between consciousness and sleep.

You know that gravelly voice before you lay your eyes on him, and your irritation is quick to flicker to life.

Nearly a month has passed since your last encounter, and for a moment, you’d thought you’d been freed from his nuisance. But now, Sanemi stands in your store, wearing a half-amused expression on his stupidly handsome face.

“Is that the only descriptor you know?” You ask miserably, hands working quickly to smooth down your mused hair. “Is everything either shit or not-shit to you?”

Sanemi shrugs. “Pretty much,” and he holds something out to you, waiting. “Here.”

It’s a to-go bag from a cafe two blocks away. One known for their almond croissants, for which you have a particular penchant.

Your stomach grumbles fiercely. You’d foregone eating breakfast when you realized you’d overslept your alarm, and had to rush out of your apartment to ensure you’d be here in time for the weekly delivery truck.

The sweet scent of butter and sugar wafting from the bag makes your mouth water.

But this is Sanemi Shinazugawa, and you should think to know better. “Is it poisoned?”

He rolls his eyes. “If I wanted to drug you, sweetheart, I’d pick a far more convenient way to do it — and one that didn’t involve me getting up at the ass crack of dawn for some overpriced pastries.”

Warily, you accept the paper bag, and Sanemi surprises you again by handing you a to-go cup of coffee. He watches as you, ever the dramatic, sniff tentatively at the lid and frown, apparently dissatisfied that you can discern nothing but the rich, aromatic scent of espresso.

Sanemi takes a deep drink from his own cup. “It’s a thank you. For that book you recommended,” He smirks. “It wasn’t shit. It was good.”

You fish a pastry out of the bag, and nearly drool as you behold its buttery, flaky goodness. “You sound surprised.”

“Maybe I was. Your success rate was only fifty-fifty. I had every right to be skeptical.”

“You’re the one who grabbed that last book,” you take a large bite out of your croissant and you fight to keep yourself from moaning. “That had nothing to do with me.” You swallow thickly before taking a large sip of coffee to wash down the pastry. “So, no date, then?”

The smile he gives you is almost apologetic. “Sorry, beautiful. I don’t actually date.” And you nearly double over at the bewildering taste of disappointment creeping sourly up the back of your throat. “Gotta keep things casual in my world.”

The once-over he gives you is razor-sharp. “And you don’t look like a casual girl.”

You resist the urge to cross your arms. “You seem awfully certain, Shinazugawa.”

“Experience,” he offers easily. “I know casual women.” He turns his head away before quietly adding, “And you ain’t one of ‘em.”

It’s odd; you know of his rather wild reputation among women, and yet he seems almost embarrassed by its acknowledgment. But as you’re slowly learning, Sanemi Shinazugawa is a conundrum you haven’t yet been able to pick apart.

You could throw it in his face; you could spew some barb about his experience, rub your salt right into his obvious wound. You have no reason to spare his feelings, not when he’s been such a consistent pain in your ass.

Your eyes drift to the empty pastry bag and coffee cup before they find him again, and suddenly, you don’t see the swaggering, cocky Corps member with a reputation for being just as dangerous and violent as he is flirtatious.

You see only the boy on your stoop; the one who’d gently removed your sister from her place on his back and handed her back to your tearful, relieved parents.

And it’s because you cannot stop seeing that boy, that you offer before you lose the courage to ask, “So, friends, then?”

Sanemi whips back to you, surprise coloring his features that quickly melts into a smile — a real, genuine smile.

And thus, Sanemi Shinazugawa, ruthless member of the Corps and a ranked Hashira, befriends a girl who runs a bookshop.

—-

In retrospect, Sanemi knows he’s probably fucked himself.

His only intention in visiting your shop after that first day had been to discern what level of threat you posed to him, if any, and to address it accordingly. Befriending you was never his goal. After all, he prided himself on his staunch ability in following the unspoken Rules of the Corps — number Three, in particular.

But he has always interpreted Three has a warning against forming bonds within the Corps. And though he knows it’s good practice to keep his circle outside its operations small as well, he rations he’s entitled to indulge his curiosity in you. He doesn’t have friends, not really. Just Genya, and his little brother lives well over an hour away, enrolled in a school in a far better — far safer — city.

It would be nice to have someone a little closer to home that he could relax around.

Yet, he can’t recall whether Rule Three would bar him from associating you outside work hours. Caution would dictate he shouldn’t, but Sanemi never claimed to be a careful man.

He never visits the same day or at the same time. Rule Two says no patterns, and though he’s steadily blurring the lines of Rule Three with each passing day, he convinces himself that as long as he abides by the first two, he won’t be in as deep shit as he, in theory, could be.

It starts out slow; tentative. Despite what he’d thought otherwise, you’re not nearly as prim and haughty as you’d tried to make him believe.

You’re sweet. Genuine, in a way that’s rare for him to encounter in his world.

Gradually, he begins spending more time with you. At first, your relationship is confined strictly to discussions of books. You swap favorites, debate which author is at the top of their genre, and you occasionally needle each other over your respective guilty pleasure: yours, bodice rippers. His, fairytales.

He spends a great deal of his free time at the bookstore, though he’s never consistent with his visits. You never ask him about it, and for that, he’s grateful. But eventually, your conversation turns to other interests — movies, shows, music — and each new mutual interest only further enamors him with you.

And when you invite him over one day after you close the shop to watch an old movie you’d swiped from the store’s limited collection, he can’t find it in him to tell you no.

The first time he visits your apartment, he is appalled.

For starters, the neighborhood you live in isn’t the safest. It’s not the Silo, by any means, but it’s an area he frequents as part of his job and that fact alone sets him on edge. He knows what kind of people linger here; knows that they tend to borrow cash that ends up in Uzui’s business — another Hashira.

And when he sees the shoebox you live in (a studio, you’d proudly boasted, as though the distraction of exposed brick and industrial piping made up for its shit location and shit security), Sanemi finds himself clutching his proverbial pearls.

He supposes he can see its appeal — you’ve certainly turned it into a home.

You’ve made a small living room out of a single couch, thrifted coffee table, and a faintly stained rug. Your TV is laughably small, but he supposes it gets the job done.

A small kitchen stands to the right of the entryway, and there is a bathroom to the left. You have a wall of closets with folding doors, and the wall directly opposite of him boasts three large, arched windows. Sanemi supposes during the day, they provide enough natural sunlight to negate any need for any overhead lighting, of which you have none. But he can’t tell if they open from the outside, so he resolves to furtively check once you’re distracted.

Your bed stands on the furthest wall, tucked into a corner and laden heavy with colorful pillows and plush throws. Books are stacked everywhere — in shelves, in corners, by plants and furniture. All well-worn and loved, their spines cracked and covers stained.

It’s lively; warm. And it has you written all over it. That alone is enough to slightly endear the place to him.

But it’s still a shit apartment in a shit neighborhood.

Worse, your door is little more than a flimsy piece of wood that latches with a single turn lock — the easiest to break, if someone was determined enough to try. He tells you as much and you roll your eyes, brushing aside his concerns as though he’s not precisely aware of what kind of filth might linger around the corner.

The next day, he brings over a deadbolt, a chain, and a drill. He bats off your indignant protests as he installs it on your door. And, because he’s petty, he forces you to sit through a painfully detailed demonstration of how to properly latch and unlatch the chain once he’s finished.

The weeks blend seamlessly into months, and Sanemi finds himself spending more and more of his free time with you. It doesn’t matter whether you’re working at the bookstore or enjoying a night of brain-rotting entertainment on your shitty little television. He just wants to be near you, and he finds himself unable to stay away.

Four months into your friendship, you start a weekly movie night, though the date is always subject to change. Still, Sanemi finds himself craving more of that precious time with you. The hours spent in your store or at your apartment fill a void in his chest he hadn’t realized he’d been harboring, and it’s a fullness he quickly becomes addicted to.

It is an odd thing, this new ritual (never routine) of his. The alternation between visiting the scum indebted to the Corps, to feel bones crush and snap beneath his hands or the iron of a spare crowbar, or blood griming to his knuckles, only to return to your bookshop or apartment, cheap beer and greasy takeout in hand, isn’t the kind of switch he imagined he’d ever make. But you make taking off his Hashira mask so damn easy, and every time he leaves he finds it more difficult to slip back on.

With each passing day, he learns you more and more. He gathers information like a dragon hoards its jewels, each new tidbit a precious gem that he tucks safely away in a mental box labeled with your name.

He learns that, while he prefers tea, you prefer coffee, but you’re picky about your order. If it’s hot, you want it black or with only the faintest splash of cream. If it’s cold, however, you want every sweet syrup and topping known to man, even though it only makes you crash like a freight train once the sugar high wears off.

He learns you think cooking means pouring yourself a bowl of cereal and calling it a day, and it’s a revelation that makes him have to walk away and collect himself, lest he start lecturing you on the importance of proper nutrition, just as he does with his brother.

In exchange, he opens up about the more sacred aspects of his life — namely, Genya. He confides in you the great pride and adoration he has for his little brother, and admits his deep-seated fear that Genya will somehow be pulled into his violent, hostile world of his. And each time Sanemi begins to feel that anxiety rear its ugly head, threaten to settle into the marrow of his bones and send him into a spiral, you’re always there to pull him back.

Sometimes you ask questions, and Sanemi tries to answer them as best he can. But there are some subjects he can never touch. Never wants to.

He can’t tell you whose blood stains his knuckles or is splattered across his shoes. He can’t tell you where he goes when his phone vibrates late at night or at random during the day. He can’t tell you what his fellow Hashira do; the specialties they oversee.

Sanemi does make a point to assure you there is one sacred creed by which they all abide: no kids. This seems to put you at ease, as though this tepid moral line somehow absolves him of the other shit he’s guilty for.

It’s selfish, this thing he has created with you. He knows that. And his blossoming friendship with you likely breaks more than one of the sacred precepts of the Corps. But you’re the first person he’s met since his initiation who knows what he is and doesn’t cower in fear, and that makes him desperate to cling onto you. You know what an ugly, beastly creature he is, and yet you do not run away from him. Even when you probably should.

So, he makes a promise. He won’t show you the Shinazugawa who belongs to the Corps; a formidable member of the Hashira, known because of the things he can do to others to make sure they pay their debts. What he does to them when they don’t.

With you, he wants to be Sanemi; only Sanemi.

And so it goes, for the better part of a year, the two of you learning one another, pretending the ease you feel in the company of the other is merely the product of two people relieved to find a friend in a city that cautions against such ties, and not something in danger of becoming more.

As though the metamorphosis hasn’t already set in.

—

“You never told me what your dream was, y’know.” Sanemi says one night while you finish up inventory at the store.

“What dream?” You hum as you scan the shelves reserved for non-fiction releases, your lips pressed into a firm line as you run your pen down the entries of your log.

He leans against the bookshelf, arms folded across the considerable mass of his chest. “Your big dream — the one you bit my head off for insulting that one time.”

You look up long enough to roll your eyes at him. “Where’s this coming from?”

“Dunno. Curious.”

“Thought you’re not supposed to ask questions in your line of work.” And you shoot him a sly grin. “You ought to be careful.”

Sanemi snorts but he nudges your foot with his. “I’m serious.”

Your eyes dance back and forth between him and the log before you. There’s no real harm in it, you decide. After all, he’s the only friend you have. “I want my own bookstore.”

“Yeah?” He raises a pale brow and waves his hand vaguely around behind him. “Aren’t you practically running this one? That ain’t enough?”

“I don’t own it, though.” You frown, setting your clipboard down. “I just work here. You’ve seen my paycheck.”

And he had, having found a paystub when he’d gone snooping under your counter. You would’ve been furious at his invasion of your privacy had you not been so mortified at the way he’d stared in horror at the pitiful figure reflecting your earnings after two, grueling weeks of work.

His insistence on bringing you meals at any and every opportunity afterward only compounded your embarrassment.

“I want something that’s mine — that I own.” You continue. “I’ve begged the owner to let me organize author meet-and-greets as a way to promote the store for months, and he always says no. If I owned my own store, I wouldn’t need anyone’s permission.”

You pull your bottom lip between your teeth. “I wouldn’t have to live under anyone’s thumb.”

Something shifts in the way Sanemi watches you, a certain profundity creeping into his eyes.

Your cheeks heat. “I know it sounds stupid —“

“It doesn’t,” Sanemi says earnestly. “Wanting your freedom can never be stupid.”

You soften then, as understanding passes between you. Of course he would know all about that — arguably better than anyone you know.

Sanemi clears his throat. “So, a bookstore?” And he gives you a broad smile as he pulls out his wallet and tosses you a twenty dollar note. “Consider me your first investor.”

—

Sanemi spends the rest of the evening watching you work, fascinated by the way you meticulously organize your store shelves, and count the cash in your register. When it comes time for you to heave boxes of excess inventory to the back storeroom so they can be shipped back to their distributors, Sanemi plucks them from your hands, batting off your protests as he carries them for you.

By the time closing arrives, every new shipment has been unpacked and its contents have been shelved.

You flick off the overhead lights in the main store, relying on the backlight of the exit door to light your way out. You tug on your coat and find him watching you, expectantly. “Are you walking me home?”

“Tch. Don’t I always, when I can?”

You grin and it’s enough to chase away some of the sourness twisting in his gut. He shouldn’t do it, as often as he does. He’s risking enough as it is by constantly redrawing the lines around Rule Three to justify the way he’s beginning to bend the parameters around the rule against patterns. But it’s dark and late, and you don’t have a car, and he’ll be damned if he lets you brave the walk home alone.

Better he’s there to protect you from the dangers he can anticipate and see than to stick to his code and risk your harm from those he cannot.

Thankfully, the journey back to your apartment takes no more than fifteen minutes, even when he stops to thumb free a cigarette from the spare carton he keeps tucked in his jacket. You wrinkle your nose at him in mock-disgust as he lights it, the smoke curling out of his mouth reminiscent of a fire-breathing dragon.

He wouldn’t do it if he knew it truly bothered you. But you’d once shyly confessed you liked the faint smell of tobacco that clung to his jacket, especially in cold air like this. So he only shoots you a wink as he brings it to his lips and takes a long drag.

Besides, he thinks as he looses a slow exhale. He needs something to help him take the edge off; to guide him in making that transition between Hashira and Sanemi.

He escorts you all the way to your front door, the two of you trading quips and jokes. And Sanemi savors how utterly extraordinary something as ordinary as walking you to your door feels. Almost as if he’s ordinary, the way he so desperately wishes he could be.

You fidget with your keys, sliding them into your lock. “Did you finish that series I recommended?”

Sanemi grins. “Last night. I think it was your best suggestion yet.”

You duck your head, a bashful smile spreading across your pretty lips and its sight fills him with a golden warmth.

Your door gives way and you turn back to him. “‘Til next time?”

It was what you always said; you never asked him when you could expect to see him again, and he appreciated it. Appreciated not having to explain himself, when most outside his world would likely demand he try.

“‘Til next time,” he confirms, returning your smile with one of his own.

You hover in your doorway, fingers drumming on the frame, eyes roaming his.

“You never told me yours — what your dream is.”

He should leave. You’re treading in murky waters, ones made dangerous because he almost wants to tell you — tell you the truth, at that.

That he dreams of more. More life. More stability. More everything. He’d settle for anything, really; anything at all.

As long as it was more than this.

But Sanemi only responds with a wry grin. “To wake up in the morning, Princess. That’s all I can ask for.”

———

Sanemi’s answer lingers with you long after you emerge from your shower, warm and toweling your damp hair.

To wake up in the morning, Princess.

He’s full of shit and you know it.

Over the course of the last year, you’ve learned a handful of crucial details that make up Sanemi Shinazugawa.

You’ve learned he loves matcha, but he really loves the expensive kind. While you can’t afford to buy the high quality powder, you make do with what you can afford at the grocery, and you make it for him as often as you can.

He drinks it every time, bitter dregs and all.

More importantly, you’ve learned what it means to have a friend involved in the Corps. Not that he’s merely involved with the notorious gang — at least, not any more than the two of you are just “friends.”

Town gossip aside, Sanemi’s affiliation with the Corps is made obvious by his own actions. Like the way the two of you only ever hang out at the bookstore or your apartment; how he never invites you to visit his place, over in the Silo.

Or how he insists on scoping out your apartment every time he comes over, his eyes alert and sharp as his hand lingers at his hip, ready to pull out the gun you know he keeps tucked into his waistband at all times.

It’s evident in the way Sanemi never sticks to a consistent schedule. He varies the days and times of his visits at random, never allowing himself to settle into a routine, even if that means going an entire week or longer without seeing you.

But perhaps the most significant detail you’ve learned about Sanemi over the year of your friendship is this:

He wants out. Dreams of it, even.

This revelation does not come from the scarred Hashira himself. It is the product of months of observation, of studying how his face darkens when his phone pings! while you’re watching some sitcom on television, or when he sees a familiar face pass by your shop window, and suddenly he has to leave because he must be Shinazugawa again, and you won’t see him for the rest of the day.

It is evident in the way he talks of his younger brother, who, by all accounts is a star student and athlete, with a promising future in collegiate archery.

Sanemi is saving every penny he can to send his brother — Genya — to school, far, far away from the Silo. The conviction with which he speaks of Genya’s future, full of college and internships and promise, breaks your heart, because you know Sanemi hadn’t anyone to want those things for him.

Sanemi does not speak of any future of his. You suspect it’s because he doesn’t believe he will have one.

That has to be why he answered your question with his vague desire to wake up every morning. It was an easy answer. One that relied on you making certain connections between his life and his words and deduce that he truly had nothing more to live for other than life itself.

A cop-out, is what it is.

But his reading habits betray his darkest secret — betray the truth — and that’s exactly how you know his flippant answer is utter bullshit.

The book Sanemi carries around the most is a series of classic fairy tales, bought off your sale table a few months back. He’s read the whole thing cover to cover, but he keeps a bookmark on one specific page, and periodically, you catch him flipping back to it.

He made the mistake of leaving the book on your coffee table one night when he excused himself to use your bathroom. Realistically, you knew it was no big deal to flip through it, but somehow, the thought still felt like an invasion of his privacy.

But your curiosity got the better of you so you snatched it up, and thumb quickly to the bookmarked page, desperate to know which story has so captivated him.

You opened to the first page of of a tale — an old French story, about the daughter of a merchant who is sent to life with a beast in a distant castle, as penance for his theft of the beast’s rose.

You smiled to yourself; you were familiar with the story. You know how it goes — the beast everyone believes to be the villain is saved by the woman, and revealed to be a handsome prince. And the two live happily ever after.

Your smile faded as you recalled how the woman saved her Beast. True love’s kiss, or something along those lines.

True love.

And as Sanemi returned from the bathroom and plopped down next to you on your couch to watch a rerun of some old sitcom before he has to leave for the night, you mulled over Sanemi’s apparent fascination with the tale of the beast and the beauty.

And that’s how you drew the series of conclusions which enabled you to see right through his thin facade.

He wants out.

He wants a happily ever after. He doesn’t think he’ll get it.

And, above all, he dreams of love.

—

If any doubt lingered as to the magnitude of his ties to the Corps, it disintegrates one night, about eight months after he’d first burst into your bookstore.

It is well after midnight, but you are still awake, too engrossed in a new fantasy novel to pay particular attention to the lateness of the hour when your phone buzzes on your bedside table.

Sanemi’s name lingers above the notification, which reads simply, Outside.

You untangle yourself from your blankets and pad over to your front door, hastily tugging on a pair of sleep boxers over your underwear.

You open the door and the flutter of excitement you’d felt upon seeing his text is chased away by shock at the sight before you.

There is a bruise forming along Sanemi’s cheek that you almost would have mistaken for dirt if not for the swelling. His hair is rumpled, his clothes in disarray. Though it winks away the second he sets his gaze on you, you swear you were able a cold fury in his eyes; foreign, and violent.

The fury that belongs to a Hashira, not to the friend you know.

Wordlessly, you step back and allow him to limp past you.

“You got liniment?” He rasps, plopping heavily down in your kitchen chair. “And water?”

“You mean icy-hot?” You’re already filling a glass from the tap that you set on the table next to him before you retreat to your bathroom to rummage the cabinets.

You return a few moments later, tub of minty topical gel clutched in hand. You nearly drop it when you realize that Sanemi has stripped himself of his shirt already and is now bare from the waist-up, his forehead resting against his arms where they’re propped up on the back of your chair.

You’ve known for a long while that Sanemi is well-built (obscenely so).

Once, in the early days of your friendship, you’d snapped at him to button his shirt properly if he insisted on hanging around your store, dramatizing over how obscene it was for him to prance around with his chest half-exposed.

Sanemi had only grinned at you before he unbuttoned two more, revealing a generous glimpse of infuriatingly toned abs. Your open-mouthed, scandalized stare was met only with a wink.

He kept his shirt like that for the remainder of the day. You’d hardly been able to look at him without flushing a deep scarlet that only seemed to inflate his already generous ego even further.

But, you’re only human. And as the months passed by, and your friendship with the scarred mobster grew, you found yourself sneaking the odd peek every now and then. A glimpse of pectoral here; a hint of his rigid v-line when he stretched his arms over his head there.

And now, here he is, sitting in your small kitchen area awaiting the relief of the icy hot clutched in the tub that grew more slippery between your rapidly sweaty palms, every mouth watering inch of his upper body on display.

Beautiful. Your mouth goes dry at the sight of him. Sanemi is unbelievably beautiful.

“Need ya to rub it into my shoulder, if you don’t mind,” his voice is muffled against his arm. “I hate asking, but I dislocated the damn thing and had to reset it — fuckin’ hurts, now.”

You know better than to suggest he go get an x-ray. No hospitals, he’d once explained. Not unless you’re bleeding out.

You also know better than to ask how he dislocated it, and so you only pad silently over to him, grateful he’s turned away from you so he cannot see the tremble in your hands or the blush creeping across your cheeks.

Eager to give yourself something to do besides ogling, you focus on unscrewing the lid on the jar of liniment, your nose wrinkling under the burn of its stringent odor. You scoop a generous amount of the salve into your palms and warm it between your hands.

“Motherfucker,” Sanemi hisses as your hands spread gently across his shoulder, your fingers gingerly massaging the topical into his swollen joint. “Shit stings.”

“You’re lucky it’s not broken,” you chide, carefully prodding along the joint in search of anything that may be amiss — an odd lump or gap, signaling something hasn’t been reset properly. “At least, I don’t think it is.”

“Your medical expertise is astounding,” Sanemi drolls, but he winces again as your fingers press against a particularly tender spot. You step away from him with a huff and fish your phone out of your pocket, hands still slathered with ointment.

“I’m not a doctor,” you shoot back. “And since you refuse to go see one, the best I can do it give you the advice of the internet.”

You ignore his grumblings as you search for treatments for dislocated joints. You tap on the first link that appears and scroll, eyes narrowed as you read.

“You’re in luck. It seems like you won’t die,” you say dryly. “But you’re going to have a nasty bruise.” You purse your lips, eyes scanning the article on your phone. “And this says you’re supposed to rest — not overexert the joint.” You reach to tug playfully on a lock of his hair. “I don’t suppose you’re actually going to do that, though.”

He twists and flashes you a mischievous smirk over his shoulder. “You know me too well, Princess.”

You roll your eyes and snort, tossing your phone onto your table in favor of reaching for a discarded kitchen towel to wipe off the excess icy hot from your hands.

You’re about to tell him to put his shirt back on and stop flaunting the muscles he just can’t seem to help but show everyone he has when your eyes snag on a mark that rests squarely between his shoulder blades.

You wouldn’t have noticed it but for the shiny redness surrounding it, a clear contrast to the rest of his skin. But the longer your stare at it, the more clear its abnormality. The mark is puffy and raised, but there’s a distinct pattern to it that makes the hair on the back of your neck curl.

A brand, you realize with horror. Someone has branded him like cattle.

Your finger reaches to trace over the ridges seared into his skin before you can think the better of it. Sanemi twitches under your touch, a small shudder skirting down his spine as he tilts his head back toward you.

“Ugly, ain’t it?” His tone is unreadable. “Like a collar, ‘cept it’s permanent.”

Though he tends to err on the side of caution when it comes to discussing the Corps, you at least know what is role is within it. He told you: debt collector. Mostly monetary debts.

But the brand has nothing to do with money. No, the symbol burned into his skin — the one that stands for Kill — is a neon sign of a reminder that Sanemi’s duties can and do entail another kind of collection.

A chill snakes down your spine. You’d had your suspicions, of course, you’re not stupid. But seeing it confirmed by a brand of all things is a lightning rod through your chest.

Sanemi must sense your stare against his back, and you hear his rueful smile though you can’t see his face. “Guess it’s fitting, since I’m their dog.”

There it is; confirmation of what he is, as though it were possible to forget. You don’t know why you’d held out in letting its weight settle over you. Nor do you know why your brain had refused, for a moment, to reconcile the Sanemi who brought cheap beer and greasy fast food to your apartment for a night of trash television and book reviews with the one before you now, branded with inexorable reminder of what his duties are when he steps outside and debts go unpaid; when scores go uneven.

Your eyes slide to his gun, resting atop your table. It may has well have been smoking.

“It’s barbaric,” you murmur. You never offer much of an opinion on the tidbits of information about his life he shares with you, unwilling to make him feel as though you aren’t someone he can confide in.

But the sight of the brand scorched between his shoulder blades stokes something ugly and angry within you. You’re grateful his back is to you so you can furtively rub your hand over your prickling eyes before he can see you do something stupid, like cry.

He tilts his head back until it rests against your abdomen. “Thank you,” he murmurs, his eyes drifting shut.

You freeze for a moment, your anger temporarily suspended against your uncertainty of whether you should step back or remain. You’ve touched Sanemi a thousand different ways — you’ve grabbed his arm, smacked him upside his thick head, and elbowed him more times than you can count.

But this; this is something far different from your teasing nudges of the past. This small gesture feels infinitely more tender. Gentle.

Intimate.

Sanemi has never not been the picture of cocky brashness, especially around you. His priggish smirk was a constant, only ever dampened by the occasional alert on his phone — the one that meant he had to stop being yours for the night, and go be theirs.

But this Sanemi? This peaceful, eased, vulnerable version of your best friend is wholly uncharted territory. And perhaps it’s because he looks so unguarded this way, his face relaxed and his eyes closed, that you feel so flustered.

You brush his hair away from his forehead. At the first graze of your fingers along his scalp, Sanemi leans further into you with something akin to a moan.

Hot; everything feels so damn hot, the air in your apartment suddenly too thick. Too oppressive.

Yet, you don’t stop; your fingers keep raking through his hair, surprisingly silky.

You think he may have fallen asleep in your chair, but after another moment of your hands carding through his hair, Sanemi stands. You step away instantly, and you avert your eyes while he pulls his shirt back over his head, cursing softly as he works it over his injured shoulder.

Sanemi turns to you and clears his throat roughly. “Thanks again. Don’t know what I would’ve done without ya.”

You wave him off with an exaggerated eye roll, eager to conceal the redness in your cheeks. “Oh please, I’m just your neighborhood book supplier and occasional first aid nurse.”

A sudden sobriety passes over his features, clouding over that all too familiar smirk with something heavier.

“No,” he murmurs and his hand absently lifts to tuck a stray lock of hair behind your ear. “No, you’re more than that.” His palm lingers against your cheek and his voice quiets to a hoarse whisper. “Much more.”

For a moment, you wonder if he’ll lean in; if he’ll show you whether his lips are as warm as his touch.

His eyes drop briefly to your mouth and your stomach somersaults at the thought he might be considering it, too. But the clouds part and Sanemi withdraws from you with an affection flick against the tip of your nose.

And then he turns and leaves.

You sink back against your door after you close it behind him and slide to your floor. You remain there for a long while after, your mind little more than a gnarled tangle of brambles you can’t begin to pick through. But even despite the complicated mess of thoughts and emotions knotted together in your head, one thing stands clear: you’d wanted to kiss him.

And for a moment, you swear he’d wanted to, as well.

An old rumor, one you hadn’t considered since your very first interaction with him, resurfaces in your mind. The one that had less to do with him in the Corps, and more so involved his activities outside of it.

The rumor that he cycles through the bodies he uses to warm his bed more frequently than you change the sheets on yours.

Your cheeks heat, and you shake your head to clear away the sudden, intrusive images of Sanemi tangled in the throes of passion with some faceless stranger that fill your imagination. You don’t care what those blasted rumors claim; you know him. And what’s more, you know that what you feel for him is stronger than anything you’ve ever felt toward anyone.

You’re in love with Sanemi.

It is his face you see at night before you fall asleep; it’s his touch you imagine in those secret moments in your bed or in the shower, when you’re desperate and aching.

It’s he who makes you feel most at ease; the one person you feel truly sees you, thinks you’re actually worth something.

You’ve never really known love before. But it’s because you’re such a novice that you know your feelings are true; powerful. You know what he is — what he thinks he is. And you know that you will never want anyone else; you can’t.

You won’t.

—

Three rules. That’s all he had to do, was follow three simple fucking rules.

Don’t speak. No patterns. And don’t get overly attached.

It had been easy, so easy, to follow them. If there was one thing Sanemi believed he could pride himself on, it had been his steadfast adherence to the Corps’ rules. Number three, in particular.

Until you. Until the day he’d chosen your bookstore to hide in.

Because that was when Sanemi decided that those rules were really more like guidelines; malleable. He’d let himself cast them aside out of a desperation for human connection. And he’d justified his carelessness by convincing himself that as long as he maintained some semblance compliance with the unspoken code of the Corps.

Sanemi had built his own set of rules around the foundation of his friendship with you, a wall of stone around the glass castle meant to ensure you would not be cut by its shards should it ever shatter.

He would not be your liability, nor would you be his.

But now, he’s too deep; Sanemi knows he’s gotten in way too fucking deep with you.

Until this moment, he imagined he’d managed to toe the line of this internal code that applied only to his relationship with you, save a handful of instances when he’d let himself blur it.

As it turns out, he’d been dead fucking wrong. Because he’s pretty sure you just asked him to cross the last major boundary he’d set for himself when it came to you.

So, Sanemi only gapes at you. “What?”

You huff, impatient. “I want you to fuck me.”

You say it like it’s the most obvious thing in the world — as though you haven’t just ripped the floor out from beneath him and sent him falling directly on his ass.

If he didn’t know you were dead serious, he would’ve laughed in your face. And that’s how he knows he’s fucked.

You’re a virgin; he knows that, because you’d drunkenly confessed it to him two weeks prior, tipsy on the cheap beer he’d brought over for your weekly movie night together.

Admittedly, he’d been surprised. You were beautiful — not that beauty was a requirement for a good fuck, but you didn’t seem the type to go for random hookups, unlike him. Still, he would’ve thought you’d had some prior relationship where the opportunity would have arisen.

As it turned out, you’d never been in a relationship, either.

Between long gulps of your drink, you’d asked him to fix it and he’d turned you down — his tolerance for watery beer far surpassed your own, and Sanemi Shinazugawa wasn’t the type to sleep with someone who couldn’t fully consent.

So he’d let you down — but not before he kissed you. It was only once; soft, the way you deserved to be kissed. His lips met yours and suddenly, the gaping hole in his chest felt smaller; fuller. Kissing you felt like coming home, even though Sanemi was sure he’d never fully known what home truly felt like.

And then he parted from you with an affectionate flick on your nose to cover the way his heart clenched at the visible disappointment in your eyes.

He’d boldly kissed you twice more after that night — one a quick, cheeky peck when you went in to hug him, an act done more to fluster you than to sate any desire of his, no matter how he craved more of you.

The other happened only three nights prior, and it was anything but soft and sweet.

One of Sanemi’s fellow Hashira, Kanae, hadn’t been seen in several days, and no one had been able to get in touch with her. When she’d missed a scheduled patrol of one of the neighborhoods in the Silo, he and another member, Iguro, had been sent to check on her.

They’d found her in the kitchen of the small home she’d shared with her two sisters with a hole in her head and her brains splattered across the floor.

Curled under the protective stretch of her limp arms, had been her two sisters, both bearing matching bullet wounds to their skulls.

Kizuki, most likely. They were the only ones brave enough to target someone as high ranked as Kanae.

Their blood had still been fresh, and the stench of decay and rot hadn’t yet set in, which only told them that the girls had been held for several days, forced to endure unknown horrors at the hands of their murderers.

He hadn’t been particularly close with the woman, but as his rank equal, she’d had his respect. But now she and her adolescent sisters were nothing more than smears of brain matter and skull fragments to be scraped off the linoleum of their kitchen floor and quietly buried. Forgotten.

The hours passed by in a blur once Kocho’s death was called into the higher-ups, and Sanemi didn’t remember cleaning up the scene anymore than he remembered the solitary trek back. His mind and his body disconnected, and he only snapped back to reality when he realized he was standing in front of your apartment, unsure of how or when he’d begun walking in its direction.

He knew he should turn around and go home; there was nothing you could do for him right then, he shouldn’t bother you —

His fist was pounding on your door before he could think better of it.

Despite the late hour, you’d greeted him with a broad smile and a shy hi. Your hair had been damp, and he could smell the floral sweetness of your shampoo still mixed with the steam from your shower as it spilled into the hall.

Safe; you were safe.

Your door had still been hanging wide open as Sanemi surged forward, trapping your face in his hands to crash his lips down against yours, his kiss heavy and hot.

You’d broken away long enough to ask, “S-Sanemi — what —?”

“Shut up,” he’d snarled, slanting his mouth back over yours, his teeth nipping at your bottom lip. He’d half expected you to shove him away, perhaps to even aim a knee right at his crotch, yet you’d only buried your fingers in his hair and tugged him closer.

He backed you up against the wall opposite of your entryway, though he’d moved his hand to cup the back of your head to keep it from banging against the exposed brick.

You moaned into the kiss and Sanemi lost whatever shred of sense he’d managed to cling onto. His tongue swept along your bottom lip, and the hand cupping the back of your head loosely pulled at your hair, tugging your head to the side and signaling you to open up — to let him in.

And you did. And the first brush of his tongue against yours as he licked into your mouth ignited an inferno within him that he did not know how to tame.

His hands pushed under your sweatshirt, seeking out the comforting warmth of your skin. Higher and higher they rose, until they came to rest against your ribs, and Sanemi realized you were bare — completely bare — beneath your hoodie.

That you’d allowed him to toe so dangerously close to a line neither of you could cross had clouded every bit of his judgment. The thought that he’d only have to move his hands mere centimeters to touch you in a way no other had before had sent him reeling, and his hips were beyond his control when they pinned yours against the wall and ground into you.

But your single gasp into his mouth broke the spell, and with more regret than Sanemi knew he should feel, he broke away, leaving you both breathless and panting.

Without a word, he’d turned around and stalked right back out of your apartment, closing your door firmly behind him.

He’d sent a text only a few minutes later — a single, ominous reminder to you to lock your door, deadbolt and all.

He hadn’t the stomach to explain his cryptic warning; not as the sight of Kocho remained burned into his retinas.

So, yes, he’s blurred a few lines when it comes to you. But those had only been kisses; heavy touching aside, he’d never allowed himself to go further than that.

No matter how much he wanted to.

And it’s because he knows he can’t cross this last line — can’t open you up to risk more than he already has, that he meets your expectant stare with a rueful smile.

“You’re better off asking someone else, Princess. You don’t want to get tangled up with someone like me.”

Never mind that you’re already tangled up with him — but he’s managed to uphold this last boundary, and Sanemi has convinced himself that as long as it remains in place, he can’t ruin you the way Kocho and her young sisters were ruined.

“I don’t want to ask someone else,” you fold your arms across your chest and cock your hip out, defiant. Normally, Sanemi finds your stubbornness endearing, if not adorable, but not now; not when you should know better.

A low growl of your name is his warning. “You don’t know what you’re asking —“

“It’s you I want. I don’t care what the rumors say, I don’t care what anyone thinks — including you.”

The sincerity in your eyes nearly scalds him. “And I am not asking as a friend. You and I both know this is more than that.”

He wants to throttle you. Not literally of course, he could never — but he wants to shake the sense you’re so clearly lacking back into you until you see; until you understand.

Of course he wants you. He has wanted you for months — so much so, he hardly can focus on anything else. And he’s pent up. He hasn’t had the stomach to fuck anyone else. Not since he began falling asleep and waking up to thoughts of you and your touch, of how you might look under or above him, wanton and desperate. Or how you might feel in his arms; on his tongue.

Really, it’s been quite a blow to his rather wild reputation throughout the Silo. But God knows he has tried to fill the you-shaped void in his heart, but nothing — no one — has come close.

More than anything, he wants you to be his, and for him to be yours. He longs to be the Sanemi who takes you out on dates, who kisses you freely without the compulsive need to check over his shoulder, to make sure there aren’t any enemies watching and plotting to strike him right where he’s weak. He wants to be the Sanemi you come home to after a long day at the bookstore. The one with whom you plan a future, utterly and completely yours.

But he can never be just Sanemi. He is nothing more than the property of the very organization he’s sworn allegiance to; the group whose brand he bears on his skin.

He is not good. He is a curse that will infect you, a poison to your life.

He will rot you from the inside, out.

His friendship with you is selfish. He knows that — he’s always known that, and yet he did not stop. It is selfish because he deluded himself into believing he could actually be someone else when he was with you. Someone worth befriending; perhaps someone worth a little more.

You were right to call him a thief, that day. All he does is take your time and affection when he knows damn well he won’t give you anything in return, no matter how he wishes he could.

Sanemi won’t label that thing he holds deep inside his heart which is formed in the shape of your name; not when it could so easily doom you both. But he knows his feelings for you are dangerous, and he cannot allow you to sniff them out.

Because if he does, then this only ends one or two ways: either he lets you in only for you to abandon him once you realize the truth of what he is, or you’re used as a weapon against him.

In either event, he loses you. So it is better to cut this off now, to force you away before either of you become more invested than you already are.

He will not hurt you, but neither will he allow himself to be hurt by you.

You take a step toward him, and the soft whisper of his name sounds like a holy prayer on your lips and that’s how he knows this is wrong.

Your obstinate refusal to recognize him for what he is is a needle digging into his skin, one that whittles away at every wall he has managed to build around his heart, that damnable, soft, dangerous thing that he will not allow you to find; he cannot.

You’re confusing your roles. He is the vulture and you are his prey, not the other way around. he is not here to give. He is here only to take, and you will let him and then he will leave.

And he will not be the carcass you pick clean only to discard once you’ve had your fill.

(A lie, but it’s one Sanemi almost believes. Almost.)

But Sanemi knows you; he knows you better than he knows anything else. You are a constant he has become far too dependent upon, and you are precious — far too precious to him to continue to indulging.

He knows you are too good, too loyal in your feelings to forget about him, even if he disappeared from your life entirely.

A clean break. it is the only thing that will force you to forget him and move on, find another, someone good and whole and not a broken, misshapen thing like him.

He will show you who he really is. He will show you that he could never be just Sanemi, and he sure as hell can’t ever be yours.

Better; you deserve better, so he will become worse.

He advances on you, his step heavy and imposing, and you have enough sense to scurry back from him. But he is too quick and soon he has you caged against the wall of your studio, literally backed into a corner.

“You want me?” He is scathing and he loathes himself for it, but he can’t stop. Not when he’s desperate to save you from the blight of himself.

You shouldn’t; you can’t.

But you nod, damn you. Wide-eyed, you nod and he resents the certainty reflected in your gaze.

His mouth twists into a cruel sneer. “You want to say you’ve had a taste of the lowlife, huh?“

Your eyebrows knit together. “Sanemi, that’s not —“

But he can’t stop his venom. “Bragging rights, that’s all you’re after, right? You want to be like one of the characters in your stories — the good girl who makes an honest man outta the good-for-nothing villain.”

“Stop it,” you bite, and your eyes harden. “You’re acting like an asshole.”

You’re angry. Good. Sanemi knows how to deal in anger.

“Hate to break it to ya, sweetheart, but I’m not acting like an asshole. I am one.”

Your hackles raise, and you step away from the wall and toward him, bold in your fury. “I know you want to believe you are, but you’re not —“

Sanemi’s hand shoots out to grab a fistful of your hair. “Is that so?” You yelp as he wrenches your head back, your neck straining. “Then maybe I oughta bend you over and fuck you like I would any other cheap whore. Then you can tell me what you think I am.”

Your eyes water as the grip in your hair tightens.

Good, he thinks savagely. Let you see the monster he truly was, let you know he was his bastard father’s son, and that he’d be no different, no different at all. He’s a brute, and you don’t want that, you don’t want him —

“You can do whatever it is you want,” you manage, you throat tight. And Sanemi’s eyes blow wide at the soft, watery smile that forms on your lips despite the tears that escape the corners of your eyes. “Do to me what you like; I don’t mind, as long as it’s you.”

All at once, his ire with you and your bewildering devotion to him melts away, leaving nothing behind but a deep well of guilt, bitter and acerbic.

It isn’t that you think he might take you forcefully and harshly; after all, he’s only shown you he’s entirely capable of doing so.

It’s that you would let him. Without a shred of doubt, he knows you would offer yourself to him to use however he wants, and that you’d do it with a smile not unlike the one you’re wearing right now, soft and earnest.

Fuck, you just did.

And it’s that realization that has Sanemi’s hand loosening from your hair, his eyes softening. An errant tear escapes down your cheek and he moves to brush it away, but you close your eyes the moment you spy his knuckle nearing your face.

You do not flinch, but you are steeling yourself in anticipation of expected cruelty, and the front he’s put forth crumbles to dust.

He is a monster, but not for the reasons he’s used to justify this ugly display of his. He’s a monster because he has made you believe that this treatment is acceptable — an unavoidable cost of intimacy, no matter how fleeting.

Worse, he’s done the one thing he’d sworn never to do to any woman, let alone someone as good and as dear as you.

He’d only wanted to disgust you; enrage you, so that you would kick him out of both your apartment and your life, right out on his sorry ass like he deserved.

But this is worse. He has frightened you.

He recoils from you like a kicked dog. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

He stands awkwardly as you stare at him, wide-eyed and uncertain, and each second that ticks silently by only amplifies the oily well of guilt in his stomach.

He clears his throat. “I’ll go,” he says roughly, too ashamed to meet your eyes. “‘M sorry, I didn’t —“

Your hand grabs his bicep, anchoring him in place. “I want you to stay.”

“You don’t owe me anything —“

“It’s not about owing you,” you interject, lifting your hands to take his face between your palms. “I want you. I want this.”

You prove your point by taking his hand and guiding it to your waist. You hold it there, mouth set in a determined line as you inch closer to him.

“You deserve someone else,” Sanemi can’t stop the admission from rolling off his tongue. “Better.”

But you’re already shaking your head, as though you somehow know different. “There is no one better; I only want you.”

Idiot, he thinks as you rise up on your tiptoes, your arms winding around his shoulders as the distance between your bodies grows narrower. You’re an idiot.

You can’t possibly believe he’s as good as it gets. He’s used you as a distraction this whole time, a chance to forget the things he’s done and what he’ll be required to do in the future. Surely, you must know that.

He will hurt you; it’s in his nature. It’s unavoidable. He can’t be what you deserve.

But then your lips brush gently against his and the last of his resolve crumbles.

Sanemi melts into your kiss. He brings one hand to cradle the side of your face as the one braced against your waist shorts, until he wraps his arms around you and tugs you closer to him.

This kiss is gentle in every way the last was not. Sanemi’s lips are soft moving against yours, his hands almost hesitant in how they hold you. For a moment, he imagines himself not as the selfish, hard brute he knows he is, but instead as the gentle, giving lover he wants so desperately to be. One who is worthy of someone as kind and vibrant as you, and not the trash you’d be better off leaving out on the street.

The tentativeness with which he kisses you tempers some as his tongue flicks out against your bottom lip. You answer his silent request with enthusiasm, your fingers burying themselves in his hair as you haul yourself closer. The moment Sanemi’s tongue sweeps into your waiting mouth, you buckle against him with the sweetest sigh he’s ever heard. One of pure relief, as though you’d been burning and he was your balm.

Ironic, considering he’s only adding gasoline to this fire between you.

But there’s nothing he can do now except allow the flames to consume you both.

Soon, the shy curiosity with which he explores your mouth gives way to a mutual hunger, evident by how he feels as though he’s boiling alive while you gasp and sigh into him, your fingers tugging pleadingly at his hair.

You want more, and he needs you, too.

His nose nuzzles against yours as he bends down, his hands running along the bare expanse of your legs. The ground beneath your feet disappears as Sanemi gathers you up easily into his arms.

One of your arms is looped around his neck while your other hand cups his face, turning it toward yours as he carries you to your bed. Your thumb smooths absently over the scar that cuts across his cheek and then your lips seek out his once more. His kiss is as gentle as the hand squeezing your waist, his fingers slotting into the gap between your sweatshirt and the top of your sleep shorts, stroking your skin.

He lays you out upon your mattress, grateful you’d at least purchased a full bed rather than some shitty twin. Your hands untangle themselves from his hair and instead seek out the waistband of your sleep shorts, but Sanemi covers them with his, halting you.

“Don’t,” he murmurs between quick, messy kisses. “Let me — please.”

Before you can respond, Sanemi sits back and grabs a fistful of his own shirt, yanking it over his head.

Your pupils blow wide at the sight of him and he feels himself hesitate. Sanemi has always felt an easy self confidence when it came to stripping in front of his partners for the night. He’d always been quite proud of his physique, relying on his considerable muscles to mask his deep loathing of his scars.

But in front of you, all sense of self-assuredness goes flying out the window, and suddenly he feels too exposed. His eyes drop to scour the planes of his chest — have his scars always been this prominent? This thick?

“Holy shit,” your soft sigh snaps his attention away from the howling inside his head. For one, petrifying moment, he thinks that you are as disgusted with his body as he is, but then he sees the pink flush staining your cheeks.

Your eyes roam hungrily over him and your tongue darts out to wet your lips. You meet his gaze and your pupils are blown wide with desire — rich, hot need for him.

Your voice is little more than a sultry whisper. “Come here.”

He moves eagerly to cover your body with his, his hair rumpled and his eyes bright as his lips press hurriedly against yours. Your hands smooth over his pectorals and tease down his abdomen until he’s panting, but the moment your nails rake along the skin on either side of his navel, Sanemi moans.

More. He needs more.

He hauls you up from the bed, straddling you across his lap, his hands notched behind your knees as they press into the mattress. You reconnect your lips in a heated kiss, one hand playing with the ends of his snowy hair, the other dropping down his back, settling over the brand seared between his shoulder blades. Covering it.

Yes, he thinks as he nips your bottom lip, urging your mouth to open so he can slide his tongue in to dance with yours. Yes, this is fitting. Because in his ideal world, his life with you would come before any other — including his with the Corps.

Sanemi’s lips begin trailing hotly down your jaw, pausing when he reaches your neck. He finds a particularly sensitive spot with a nip of his teeth that he soothes with his tongue, and he hums in approval at the faint, breathy whimpers that squeak past your lips as you tilt your head, offering more of yourself to him.

The ache burgeoning in his groin in response to your display is enough to drive him insane; he has never wanted anything in his life as badly as he wants this — you.

As his mouth continues its heated path, his hands find the hem of your hoodie. With a gentleness that surprises even him, Sanemi begins charting your skin with his fingers. With every new plane of your body he explores, he pushes your sweatshirt up, up, up, until he guides it over your head.

He tosses it to the side, not caring for where it lands. His attention is focused solely on you as you fall back against your bed, now bare from the waist up.

“Beautiful,” he marvels, eyes running over the slope of your shoulder and tracing the curve of your breasts. “So fuckin’ beautiful.”

He savors every hitched breath, every chill that ripples over your skin as he explores your body with his mouth and hands. Over the years, Sanemi has become well acquainted with the magic of the female body. He’s always liked how soft women were compared to him. He isn’t a picky man; he’ll celebrate them all, regardless of their shape or size.

But you? Celebration isn’t enough; you deserve nothing less than outright worship.

“You feel so damn good,” he mutters against your breast before closing his lips over your nipple and sucking hard. You bow off the bed with a keening moan that gutters out into something more ragged as his hand covers the other, pinching and rolling your stiffened bud between his fingers.

He could spend all night like this, lavishing your soft mounds with his mouth. But Sanemi knows that won’t be enough to satisfy the hunger gnawing at both of you, so with a tinge of regret, he forces himself to move on, descending your body in alternating kisses and nips.

He reaches the waistband of your shorts and his eyes flash to yours as he tugs on it with his teeth. The hot exhale of his breath below your navel sends goosebumps across your skin. Sanemi’s fingers inch below the hem of your shorts until he loops his hands around the waistband, and he yanks them down your legs in a single, fluid motion.

His eyes rake down your body, taking in every beautiful inch. A blush forms on his cheeks as he realizes all that separates you from him is your simple pair of black underwear.

He sits back, eager to join your near-nudity. His hands are quick, if not a little clumsy, as he finds his belt buckle. The instant the metal clicks and the leather around his hips loosens, Sanemi shoves off his pants, eagerly kicking them off your bed until he is left in nothing but his briefs.

Your eyes fall to where the evidence of his desire protrudes stiffly from between his legs. Sanemi watches your throat pulse as you try to stifle your small gulp, your thighs tensing beneath him in an effort to press together.

He can sense your nerves; can see by the way your eyes dart anxiously between his and the rigid tent in his briefs.

With a gentle smile, Sanemi leans in and soothes your unease with his lips. “We’ll take it as slow as you want. I’m not in any rush.”

“N-now?” You murmur between kisses, and he nearly seizes at the hesitant, questioning brush of your fingers against the underside of his shaft.

“Not yet,” he groans against your mouth. “I gotta make sure you’re ready first.”

“I am ready -“

“Not like that,” he cuts off your protest by ghosting his fingers up the covered seam of you. Sanemi circles his finger around where he thinks your clit is, and he smirks when your head tips back against your pillow, your mouth widening in a silent o.

“Found you,” he croons, repeating the movement again until your legs begin to twitch beneath him.

He makes quick work of your underwear, tossing them over the side of your bed without much thought. The sight of you bare beneath him nearly stops his heart dead in his chest. His eyes drop to the neat thatch of curls resting at the apex of your thighs, and his mouth waters.

You blush under the intensity of his appreciative stare, and your legs twitch, as though you mean to close them.

A hand sliding between your thighs restrains you from doing so. “Uh-uh,” he tuts. “Can’t hide from me now, sweetheart’.”

He smooths his hand down the length of your leg until it hovers just outside where he’s most eager to explore. The heat radiating from sends his pulse skyrocketing.

One, tentative finger circles your entrance, testing. Sanemi leans in to capture your lips with his as he pushes in, swallowing your soft gasp with his tongue that he slides into your parted mouth.

A moan vibrates in his chest in time with a faint whimper that sounds in the back of your throat as Sanemi begins exploring you. You’re tight; almost impossibly so, clenching and pulsing around the single finger he gradually sinks inside you, pushing deeper with every gentle pump of his hand.

The thought of your tight, wet heat constricting around the aching length of him just as you were around his finger makes him dizzy with want.

He won’t go down on you, he decides. Not tonight. Not when he’s throbbing this badly after just a couple of fingers; not when your breasts are so plush and soft pressed against his chest where you’re already arcing up into him, sending his mind wild with thoughts of how you’ll move under him; how you’ll moan.

His lips are hot against your neck, trailing down past your collarbone. Left behind are a series of purplish-maroon whorls blooming beneath his mouth, your skin quickly becoming a tapestry for him to display how badly he wants this. You.

You cling to him, one hand buried in his hair, pulling and tugging at him as the other clutches wildly at his shoulder, your fingers digging hard into his muscles. Your teeth are buried into your bottom lip in an effort to stifle your whimpers, but a needy whine slips out as Sanemi sucks one, soft breast into his mouth, his tongue flicking out across your pert nipple.

Another finger slides into your entrance as his thumb works your clit, and before long, you’re vibrating beneath him, unrestrained in how you moan and cry out for him so beautifully.

“Sanemi! I think — oh, I think I’m -“ but then he crooks his fingers, brushing against a rough spot deep within you that makes you writhe. You thrash back hard against the bed, your hips grinding against his hand with abandon.

He smothers a curse into your skin. You’re close and he knows it; can feel it in the way your walls flutter and pulse around him. And as desperate as he is to study how you fall apart, it’s too soon.

“Not yet,” he pants against your breast, circling your nipple with his tongue before imparting a final nip at the soft flesh and drawing back.

Remorseful, he pulls his fingers away from you, leaving you panting and flushed under him. But the hot, searing flames of desire burning beneath his skin intensify still, as he takes your hand and guides it between your legs.

“There. Feel how wet you are?” His voice is husky with want. You peer up at him through heavily lidded eyes as you nod, a whimper vibrating in your throat as Sanemi grinds your hand against your sensitive flesh.

“For you,” your voice is syrupy and warm, and damn if Sanemi doesn’t feel like he could get drunk on it. “It’s all for you.”

His tone sharpens into something possessive; hungry. “That’s right,” and he pushes your hand firmly against your clit and rotates it, eliciting a deep moan from you. “Because you’re mine.“

It’s not fair. But he wants to pretend like it’s true, if only for a while.

Once your fingers are sufficiently shiny with your own wetness, he brings your hand to his mouth, his tongue peeking out from between his lips. Slowly and languidly, he drags it up the side of your digits, and his eyes burn into yours as he slides your fingers into his mouth and sucks them clean.

It takes everything in him not to moan at the sweet taste of you that floods his tongue.

He’d made the right decision in not going down on you. If he had, he’d never be able to pull away; not until his face had become so adorned with your essence that he could not comprehend anything that wasn’t you. Not until you were trembling under him and begging for a break.

The first time you cum will be on him; with him. So as much as it pains him, he resists your temptation.

But not before you know; not before you understand exactly how wild you drive him. How much you threaten his sanity.

“Jesus Christ,” he rasps as he pulls your hand away from his mouth. “Here.”

His hand his gentle but firm as he grips your chin, squeezing your jaw until your mouth parts. The question in your gaze dissolves, your eyes instead rolling back into your head, as Sanemi slides the two fingers he’d just had between your thighs, still covered in your wetness, past your lips.

“Go on,” he orders, his other hand brushing your hair from your face. “Taste how fuckin’ perfect you are.”

The moan that slips free from your lips is one he wishes he could bottle up as your tongue caresses his fingers, your cheeks hollowing so fucking perfectly around him as you dutifully clean yourself from him.

Fuck, you’re trying to kill him.

But some of the burning he feels ebbs as the sobering weight of what’s to come settles over him; the magnitude of what he is about to do. Because no matter what happens after, nothing between you will be the same. Whatever else you are after tonight — whether that’s something or nothing — you will never be just friends again.

Sanemi supposes the punishment fits his crime; this is what he gets for getting in too deep with you, even if it means losing you entirely.

He chases away those thoughts by running his hands down your sides before he pulls back, leaving you in favor of shucking his briefs down his thighs.

Finally bare, he’s quick to drape his body over yours once more, his hands smoothing up and down your sides, unable to quench his need to feel your skin against his. But a foreign uncertainty stills him, and his eyes flash to yours, hesitant.

“Are you sure?”

You answer only by reaching to grip the back of his neck, tugging him down to meet your lips, your kiss feverish and urgent.

He doesn’t have a condom but he’s in too deep now to stop. In a way, what is about to happen is new to him as well. He’s never fucked anyone raw before. No matter who he’d had in his bed, no matter how much they begged him or assured him they were on birth control, he’d always been sure to have protection on hand.

Children are a gift, but he’d be damned if anyone tried to come after him and demand he raise one in his fucked up world. Either Sanemi got out or he never became a parent; there was no middle ground.

But once again, he is blurring boundaries where you were concerned, and Sanemi doesn’t think he knows how to stop himself from having the full taste in the indulgence that was you.

“It might hurt a moment,” he admits against your mouth, his voice raspy. “But I promise I’ll be gentle — as gentle as I can.”

You stretch to kiss him again, your lips soft and warm and everything he loves. “I trust you.”

You shouldn’t, he wants to say. You shouldn’t, and you should run far away from this — from me.

But Sanemi knows you won’t just as much as he knows he doesn’t have it in him to try and chase you away, and so he only kisses you back, slow and indulgent.

He breaks away from you with a soft groan and sits up on his knees. His back straight, Sanemi’s hands curl around your hips and he tugs you forward until your backside is flush against his thighs.

The heat radiating from you pulls him in like a magnet as he lines the tip of his cock up with your entrance. A vein above his brow ticks, the only outward sign of the battle raging within him as his self restraint wars with his tantalizing urge to impale you on the thick, throbbing length of him, desperate for the sweet relief only your body can give.

Every inch of him trembles as Sanemi presses his hips forward. “Fuck,” he exhales shakily, pushing his tip past your entrance. “Fuck.”

His head falls back and the muscles in his throat strain. Some small, needy sound leaves him and the fingers on your hip tighten nearly to the point of pain.

The noise registers in the back of your mind, and vaguely, you recognize it as a whimper. You wonder whether he makes that sound for the others; somehow you doubt it, given that he does it again, only now in the shape of your name.

The rumors always said he never asked for names; he was a one-and-done kind of man. A great fuck, but not someone to go to if you were looking for comfort; softness.

Once again, Sanemi is nothing but a collection of contradictions, especially where you’re concerned.

Sanemi hisses as he slowly eases into you. Despite your wetness, you’re impossibly tight, and your body is a live wire hell bent on pushing out his intrusion.

With a deep groan, he falls forward, one arm shooting out to land near your head to catch himself before he can crash into you. His weight carefully braced above you, Sanemi shifts, widening the stance of his knees. Your legs slide up his waist, locking at your ankles at the base of his spine.

His cock is barely a quarter of the way inside your heat when he pulls out. A whine of protest mounts in your throat, but it quickly flickers out when he presses his leaking tip to your clit and grinds. A soft moan slips out of you when he repeats the movement again, and your thighs widen, your hips tilting up to allow him easier access.

Sanemi circles the head of his cock once more against your sensitive nub, coating himself in more of your sticky wetness, before he slides back into your entrance. This time, your body parts more easily around him, sucking him in rather than trying to squeeze him out.

“There you go, that’s it,” his breath is hot against your ear, his lips trailing silkily across your jaw. “That’s my girl.”

Halfway in, Sanemi brushes against that thin barrier that separates him from the rest of you, and he stills.

He pulls his head back from your neck, and moves his hand out from between your legs to cup your cheek.

“Ready?” His thumb strokes over your cheekbone, tender and soft.

There is a tightness building in your abdomen, a foreign pressure that isn’t entirely unwelcome, but neither is it wholly comfortable. You brace a hand at your side, balling your sheets into your fist as you steady yourself, flushed and panting beneath the scar speckled man holding rigidly still above you.

Your eyes flick up once, and you see the tightness in his jaw; the tremble in his limbs as he fights against the urge to relief the friction mounting where you are joined.

You swallow around the lump of anticipation lodged in your throat. Your breath is shaky, but at last, you manage a single “Please.”

With a groan, he grips himself around his base and slowly, he presses forward. There is a sharp prick that shoots deep in your lower abdomen as Sanemi surges past that thin inner wall.

You cannot stop your cry of discomfort from ringing out anymore than you can stop the surprised tears which escape the corners of your eyes as the sharp pain between your legs intensifies.

But then Sanemi’s lips are there, kissing away your tears, and the hand he’d used to guide himself into your body skims along the outside of your thigh, hiking your leg higher up his waist before it drops to rub gentle circles into your hip.

“I’m sorry,” he murmurs between soothing caresses of his lips against your cheeks and across your eyelids. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

He coos his string of apologies as his cock continues to push into you. On and on he sinks, his length endless, and you begin to think your body will split in two before you find the end of his.

Just before you reach your limit, Sanemi stills, fully embedded in your heat. He pants through gritted teeth, his jaw locked against the way you’re constricting around him so tightly it’s nearly painful.

It’s unreal; not only does Sanemi realize how much fucking better sex feels without the restriction of a condom, but he’s also bashed over the head with the realization that you were made for him. For nothing, no one has ever felt as incredible as you.

Nothing in his life has ever felt so right.

Sanemi has always been someone who fucks fast and hard. He’d had no objective other than to escape for a few, blissful moments in the body of another as he pretended not to feel the hollowness in his chest, or the throb of his own self-loathing.

With you, however, he wants nothing more than to relish every movement of your body against his, to savor your every gasp and sigh; to learn what makes you lose control.

You are no temporary distraction; he wants to know you.

He drops his forehead against yours and waits, allowing you to adjust to the intrusion of him.

He trails his lips across your collar bone and down to the twin swells of your breasts, sucking softly at your plush skin as you fidget and squirm beneath him. One broad hand skirts down the outside of your thigh until he finds your knee, and gently he guides your leg around his hips. The other he leaves relaxed against the bed, your foot resting somewhere against his calf.

When your eyes flutter open and find his, he knows you’re ready. So he moves his arm out from between your bodies and winds it instead around your waist, deepening the arch in your back until his chest is flush with yours.

His lips press to your forehead, a silent warning that he is about to move.

And then Sanemi begins molding your body to the shape of his.

He starts slow. He doesn’t withdraw far from you, instead focusing on rolling his hips against yours. Each churn of his groin pushes his cock deeper into your warmth, and soon, your timid whimpers melt into soft moans as your initial discomfort gives way to pleasure.

Encouraged by the way your body starts to relax in his embrace, Sanemi tests drawing his cock out a few inches before plunging back into you.

Before long, the room fills with the lewd sounds of skin slapping against skin, and Sanemi’s moans join yours as he rapidly becomes lost in the euphoria of your wet, tight heat.

One of your arms jumps to lock around his ribs, your nails sinking into his skin as you anchor yourself to him.

His hand snakes across the sheets in search of yours. When he finds it, fisted against your sheets, he pries your fingers loose, winding them with his and he wraps your arm around his shoulders.

“Tighter,” he gasps. “Hold me tighter. Please.”

Your fingers dig into the muscles of his back and Sanemi groans his approval.

And then he’s rolling to his side, pulling you along with him until you’re stretched out across the length of your mattress, chest to chest.

His hand grips under your thigh, tugging it over his hip as he rocks harder into you. “Talk to me, angel,” the hand under your thigh moves to splay across your rear, pushing and pulling your hips in time with his as he grinds. “Tell me how you feel — tell me what you want.”

You cry out, mournful, as Sanemi draws out his cock nearly to its tip before he plunges back into you.

The fullness you feel is overwhelming. You can’t stand that empty feeling, even for a moment. So you hitch your leg higher around his hip, and dig the heel of your foot into the firmness of his ass, limiting his movements.

“Closer!” You gasp. “I — I need you closer.”

He needs that too, he decides; craves it. He doesn’t want to feel any space between your bodies. He wants — he needs — to be so enraptured with you that there is no point in trying to separate. That way, he might get to keep you for just a little longer.

Sanemi’s hand massages your backside, his cock throbbing with every push into you. “Deeper,” he confirms between throaty groans. “You want me deeper?”

You bury your face into his shoulder. Your teeth sink into his skin and with a moan, you nod.

He can do that; is more than happy to, as a matter of fact.

So, with a faint snarl, Sanemi grips the fat of your ass and spreads you wide, and he begins thrusting, hard.

The new angle allows the tip of his cock to bump up against a sweet spot deep inside you. Sanemi’s eyes narrow at the way your head drops back, a loud cry tearing from your throat.

Determined to hit that point within you again and again, he shifts his hips under you while hiking your leg higher up his hip, his fingers digging into the curve of your ass.

It’s a success; soon, your wails echo throughout your studio, punctuated by every punishing slap of his skin against yours.

Really, he can’t give less of a damn at how thin your apartment walls are. The sounds pouring from your mouth are the prettiest fucking thing he’s ever heard.

Something hot and electric mounts quickly in your stomach with each of his frenetic movements. You’ve come before with your own hand, but this — this is something different. Something far more intense, something that threatens to rip you apart from your very sanity until you know nothing but him.

You try and tell him you’re losing control but all that comes out is a pitiful whimper.

But he knows; he knows exactly what you need.

“I’m here, baby, I’m here. I’ve got you.” And with that, Sanemi rolls you back underneath him, settling into the cradle of your thighs and pushing his cock faster and deeper into you. His arms gently unwind yours from his shoulders, and he brings them up over your head, one large hand pinning them down.

“I’ll take care of you, sweet girl,” he promises, and he weaves the fingers of the hand keeping you pressed against the mattress with your own. “Just keep your legs around me.”

Your thighs squeeze his waist in silent answer, your mind far too suspended in the throes of your pleasure to do anything else.

With his lips trailing along your neck leaving hot, open-mouthed kisses in its wake, his free hand slides between your sweat-slicked bodies. He wedges it between where his groin is pressed to yours, and he searches along your sensitive, swollen folds, seeking the spot between your thighs that made you tremble and whine for him earlier.

You jolt under him as his fingers find you again, that foreign, electric sensation sparking deep in your abdomen. “Sanemi —“

“It’s okay,” he murmurs sweetly, pressing down on your clit until you arch further into him with a gasp. “It’s gonna feel so good, baby, I promise. Just focus on me.”

Each rotation of his hand against your sensitive bead matched the deep, pointed roll of his groin, with Sanemi capping the end of every powerful thrust with alternating pulses of his thumb. The pressure he uses mounts with every churn of his hips, and the moan vibrating in your chest as another surge of sticky wetness gushes from your thighs is the sweetest sound he thinks he’s ever heard.

A broken chant of please please please stutters its way out of you, spurning him to go faster; hit deeper.

And Sanemi only knows how to oblige you.

“You’re doing so fucking good, sweetheart. Just keep letting me take care of you —- that’s it.” He curses as you clench down around him, crying out in approval at his praise. “Yeah, yeah. You’re my fuckin’ girl, aren’t you?”

A single wail of his name is your only response, but it’s enough of a confirmation to damn you both.

“You are,” he affirms, his voice taking on the timber of a growl. “Mine. You’re fuckin’ mine.”

His thrusts grow sloppier with every second, though each is punctuated by a silent, recurring chant of mine, mine, mine. Though your eyes are closed, Sanemi can spy a faint sliver of white peeking out from between your eyelids.

You’re close; he can feel it. And he knows, as the walls of your cunt flutter and tighten around him, that your climax will be his undoing.

The hands he has pinned against the mattress over your head flex as you twist and writhe beneath him. your head tosses from from side to side, and the vibrato of your cries rises octave by octave. Every muscle in your body is tense; you are a live wire thrumming with a need to come apart that he knows you do not fully understand.

Sanemi grunts as he fucks you harder into your bed, no longer concerned with keeping his weight off you. He will show you; he will show you how to shatter, and then he too, will break.

But he needs to see you, first.

“Look at me,” his voice beckons you back from the precipice of ruin. “Look at me, Y/N.”

Your eyes open to meet his and suddenly you’re right back at that edge, only this time, you’re falling freely over it, plummeting down a drop that has no end.

“S-Sanemi —!” It’s all you can manage before the knot steadily building in your stomach unravels. Your back arcs sharply away from your bed, and Sanemi ducks his head to smother his own cry against your breast as he takes its tip into his hot mouth.

Your hips jerk and twitch against his, your cunt seizing around him with force that threatens to squeeze the life out of him. Above you, your arms strain and pull against his grip as you writhe and sing for him.

“That’s it baby, that’s it,” Sanemi’s praise is muffled against your sternum, though it is strangled as he nears his own end. “Fuck!“

He’ll have to buy you the morning-after pill tomorrow, he realizes as you continue to come apart so beautifully on his cock, a soft chant of his name the only thing on your lips. He will not force you to bear the consequences of his own selfishness; he will not saddle you with his burden.

But he’s also not strong enough to pull out; not when your body feels like it was made for him, not when your sweet cunt is gripping him this hard, is this wet — all because of him.

He is selfish and he is weak; it’s a toxic combination, and yet he knows cannot stop.

Sanemi’s hips snap a final time against yours, pushing them up and away from the mattress, pressing deeper than he thought possible. His eyes roll back as his own orgasm rocks through him, powerful and blinding, and the growl that built in his throat melts into a strained groan.

He holds you in place, his cock pulsing in time with your cunt while the two of you ride out the waves of your climax together, his cum steadily filling you with his warmth. Your hands skirt down the length of his arms, blindly searching for his hips. When you find him, you pull and tug, a faint whine sounding from the back of your throat. Sanemi answers your plea with a broken moan of his own and he rocks against you, your hips circling with his until he finally lets you collapse against your mattress, limp-limbed and exhausted.

He follows you down, smothering you with his weight as he clings to you like a lifeline, his face buried in the crook of your neck.

“Fuck, you did so good, sweetheart. So fuckin’ good.” He moans into your ear before he pulls back, his eyes searching your face as he pants.

One hand cradles your jaw and his thumb strokes repeatedly over the flushed curve of your cheek. “You okay?”

You don’t answer right away, your eyes shut tight, and Sanemi feels panic bubble hot in his stomach. The hand cupping your face tightens with his worried call of your name, his fear rearing its ugly head, ready to rip him apart, to turn him into the horrid monster he’s always known he was —

“I love you,” and then you’re peering up at him, eyes round and shining with emotion he does not deserve to feel. “I love you, Sanemi.”

It would’ve hurt less if you’d shot him.

Whatever wall remained around his heart cracks and crumbles under the weight of your confession. Sanemi does not answer, cannot find the words to adequately capture the depth of his feelings.

Instead, he snatches you up into his arms, crushing your body against his.

He kisses your lips and then your cheek. One hand cups the back of your head, his fingers burying into your hair as he presses your face into his chest. His arms tremble as he holds you close, every hard ridge of him cradled against your soft curves. He feels your smile against his collarbone, and the way your fingers dance up and down his spine that makes him melt.

It hits him, then. You aren’t waiting for an answer — you said it only so he would know, and you’d not expected anything in return.

All you’d done was give while he took and took. Your body. Your love.

He doesn’t deserve any of it.

Whatever or whomever came after this would never compare to you. Truthfully, Sanemi doesn’t think it would be worth trying anything different. Everything now began and ended with you — including him.

He twists his head to kiss you again and again, your lips meeting his with a sleepy enthusiasm.

He pants as he breaks away. “‘M gonna pull out — might be uncomfortable for a second.”

You wince at the sudden stab of cold left behind by Sanemi’s retreating warmth. He shifts back onto his knees and slides his hands down your thighs, parting them.

A low whistle blows past his lips. “Damn, I made a mess outta you.”

For a moment, Sanemi can’t tear his eyes away from the sight between your legs; the sight of him trickling out you, staining the sheets below. But some of that hot, possessive pride that wells in his chest tempers at the small smear of blood staining your inner thigh.

His fingers massage your legs in silent apology. “Let me clean you up.”

Your hands shoot to grasp at his shoulders, a pleading whimper on your lips. “Don’t leave — not yet.” You bite your lip, your eyes wide and anxious. “Please, can you just hold me for a bit?”

Sanemi’s eyes soften and his heart throbs painfully in his chest. He can’t imagine leaving you; not now, not ever. No matter how stupid and selfish that makes him.

He’d be lying if he said he didn’t know the source of your anxiety — or that you didn’t have reason for it. Sanemi isn’t known for lingering.

But this is different — you’re different. You’re not some temporary distraction. You’re everything. His everything.

“Shhh,” he maneuvers you easily atop him, settling you in against the length of his torso, his hands smoothing up and down the column of your spine. “I’m staying right here, sweet girl. I’m not goin’ anywhere.”

He seals his promise with a gentle kiss against your forehead before laying his cheek against your temple, cradling you to his chest.

Finally, you relax against him, convinced. He lays with you for a long time after, one hand on the back of your head, his fingers rubbing against your scalp until you fall asleep on against him, safe and sound and warm.

Minutes pass, or maybe hours. But Sanemi’s head does not quiet, not even under the soothing sounds of your deep, slow breaths as you dream.

He must have lost his mind. There is no other explanation for the way he’s disregarded every rule, every boundary he’s ever made sense of, all in the name of you. In a single evening, you managed to obliterate every last defense, every barricade he’d safely cowered behind, and now that the castle has fallen, he isn’t quite sure what he’s supposed to do with the rubble.

What he does know is that there’s no putting things back to how they were.

His eyes search your sleeping face because if you were able to make him question nearly everything that made sense in his life, then surely you must also have the answers he needs to re-strike balance in his tilted world. Maybe they lie among the lashes that tickle your cheek, or in the occasional twitch of your mouth between your deep inhales.

But Sanemi is only left feeling more confused the longer he watches you. Because, despite the way he feels vulnerable and exposed at how easily he has been stripped of his guard, he can’t quite bring himself to believe it was entirely your doing.

His eyes widen. There’s his answer.

Perhaps you are not trying to sink your nails into his flesh to peel it back, to demand he be stripped to the bone for you to inspect, to scrutinize and use as you please.

Perhaps that is what you’ve done to yourself, and you’re waiting to see if you will join you; to know if he can volunteer his vulnerability, rather than wait for someone to come and force it from him.

He cannot make any promises. He has spent so much of his life cowering behind the armor he crafted out of his scars and his sneers and barks that were always more ferocious than his bite, that he does not know how to take it off. He does not know how to navigate the world without its weight, both his safety net and his chain. And there is an understanding in your eyes that signals you know that, too.

But he can try.

He mouths I love you against your hairline — he does not voice it, not yet, though it’s what he feels. But your love is a compass that just might point him down the road the leads to a life he so desperately wants; to you.

And he’ll get there, maybe.

In time.

LIKES, REBLOGS, COMMENTS APPRECIATED!

#demon slayer #sanemi shinazugawa #kimetsu no yaiba #kny #kny x reader #kny fanfic #kny sanemi #sanemi x reader #kny fic #demon slayer fanfic #demon slayer smut #kny smut #shinazugawa sanemi #sanemi x you #sanemi smut #demon slayer sanemi #kimetsu no yaiba sanemi #sanemi x y/n

416 notes · View notes

hidtired · 2 days

Text

Unfortunate Timing [Part 2]

(Daryl Dixon x Reader) Masterlist

Description: You found out your pregnant early into your relationship with Daryl Dixon. To make matters worse? The apocalypse happens a few days later! (not fully canon)

4.2k words

Warnings (Pregnancy, gore, abuse, violence, fluff, walking dead stuff, ect.)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 etc.

A single moment can change your life, change the world. Everything only seemed to get worse. The quarry was a group of survivors that had formed. You and the Dixons were outcasts, at least it felt like it. The girls seemed to see you in low regard being pregnant. The men were no better. They saw you as a burden. The feeling of people talking behind your back stressed you out. Being pregnant also didn’t help. You felt tired all the time, also being plagued with morning sickness. Which is a stupid name when it happens all day. Throwing up in a world were food is now limited also leaves you uneasy.

You also see that stress weighing on Daryl. It wasn’t long ago he struggled with the fact of having a kid. Now seemed even more terrifying. He was becoming short tempered, to his credit only snapping at you once but regretted the way he almost made you cry. “No! I won’t take a break I have to keep going out there for food! You’ve been throwing up half the shit I’ve already gotten for you!”

He didn’t mean for it to sound like your wrong for doing so, he knew you couldn’t help it. He saw the glassy film come to the corner of your eyes. His heart tugged. You were in your tent you shared, sat on the sleeping bag with your head shamefully down. “No, no. Come on…” he angled your face back up to met his. He sank to his knees in front of you. “I know you can’t help it. M’ just trying to say you need more. I just want to make sure you’re gettin enough.” You had asked him to stay because he was rarely around. He was out alone looking for food and you couldn’t help but see every time he came back a little more on edge. He was getting into his head to much out there.

He knows you’re having a hard time. With being pregnant at this moment in time how could you not. You had tried to talk to the mothers of the camp for advice on anything, they didn’t bat an eye to you. You had looked for support and were denied it. He saw that you were being treated like a Dixon. Something he was familiar with, and something Merle also understood. Merle became more chill around you. No more sexual comments or sexist remarks. Doesn’t mean he is any less better to be around. He treated you like a sister you thought. He still was an ass. Making mean comments or complaining about something you did. But he had become family.

Andrea was your biggest pain. She seemed like she had something to prove. She hated the traditional female roles that had been pushed onto the girls. You understood her disliking for Merle but she attached that to Daryl and you as well. She didn’t say outright mean things but subtle jabs. Week after week it was chipping at your demeanor.

So here you are now, you think almost 3 months pregnant. Seeing Daryl was the highlight of whenever he appeared. You sat in your tent with him getting ready for his 2 day hunting trip for a deer he knew was near by. He signed feeling your eyes on him, “Yer breakin my heart with that look.” Your smiling face replacing your sulking one, “I’m just missing you already.” You stood up, “You should see something before you go.” He turned to you questioningly. You pulled your shirt up over your stomach and turned to the side, “I know I haven’t seen myself in a mirror for a while but, I think I’m showing?” You looked up from your little bump that you could see spotting the surprised face he was making. He gulped before talking, “Ya sure are…” he walked closer placing a hand to your tummy. You saw his teeth were clenched. He felt the weight of pressure crushing him,

“We are doing are best, that’s all I could ask form you.”

He left for his hunt a little less stressed. You also saw Merle off later into the day with the first group run to the city. “Hey do me a favor and don’t get yourself killed.” Merle turned to you, “And have those freaks naw on m' sweet ass?” You chuckle as you walk away, “Let’s just hope you remember your ass from your elbow!”

The day progress like any other. It had just become the afternoon when the sound of the radio chirped on. It cause some disagreement about making a sign to warn others about the city. You just went back to minding your own business. You helped boil water taking notice of Lori trimming her son’s hair. You spoke up noticing the displeased look on Carl's face, “Going for a mohawk Carl? Or maybe you’re thinking bald.” His nose scrunched up at the thought. You laugh at the reaction, “Bald people run faster.” Carl smiled, “Nuh-uh!” You shook your head and shrugged, “How do you know if you won’t try.” He looked to his mom, “I’d rather have hair than be faster!” He said it to his mom like he tried convincing her to not make him bald. Lori smiled at her son, “Ya me to, but if you keep moving you might be bald at the end of this.” He straightened and stilled, but he still spoke, “I hate haircuts…”

Shane came and sat down looking at you briefly. “One of these days you’ll be missing your mother’s hair cuts.” Carl rolled his eyes, "I'd like to see that day!" It had initially shocked you that Shane wasn’t Carl's dad. You always assumed for how close they were and how often they would walk into the woods together. Then it put a gross feeling into your mouth that his father had only recently died. Shane was his apparent best friend and coworker. But it wasn’t necessarily wrong, you just didn’t like to think about it often.

After finishing with boiling water you handed it to Carol. You felt sweaty and all around unpleasant. You needed a nap. You said to Carol that you were going to lay down if they needed to find you. You woke up to arguing. The group that went out had radioed saying there was a problem. Everyone was scared for their respective family that had gone to the city. You felt a pit form in your stomach. The hormones in your body already swarming causing you to be unable to control them. You picture what happened to your Aunt in front of you. Sometimes it still feels as if the blood was still on your face. The thought of knowing she was one of those things walking around somewhere. Maybe they all were already dead let her. You weren’t exactly thrilled about Merle as a person but, you knew deep down he was another person to help protect your baby.

You decided there was no use in stressing yourself, so you went and distracting yourself with chores. Laundry, moving fire wood to our fire pit, took a walk near the perimeter, which now leaves you here at the waters edge. You used the cool water to help with the swelling in your feet and ankles. Week after week you had the sense that being pregnant is going to really suck farther down the road. You fiddle with your knife while swaying your feet in the water. Lost in your own world when an echo starts to ring out throughout the quarry.

The car alarm got louder so you slipped your shoes on and walked back up to the camp. You saw a red car and Glenn standing outside of it. Shane opening the hood and pulling something to stop its beeping. People were yelling at him for answers when a van appeared, ‘so everyone made it back.’ It was a relief to stop the constant thought of the worse. You couldn’t help but notice Merle nowhere to be seen. But that thought was pushed aside when you heard Carl scream,

“DAD!”

You watched with a smile at the reunion of the Grimes family. Also taking notice of Shane making a weird face. He probably was feeling sick to his stomach and you thought it kinda deserved. He did persuade his grieving wife. The thought was interrupted by T-dog coming toward you with a concerned face. You clicked something was wrong, then started to look around. Merle was still no where. The sinking feeling of realization hit you. T-dog watch as understanding washed over you. A hand over your mouth, “W-where is Merle?” A few others turning at the mention, Lori’s husband taking the most notice. T-dog spoke first, “He was putting all of us in danger. He was cracked out of his mind.”

You squeeze your eyes shut, ‘I told him to behave.’ You inhale trying to calm yourself, “He dead?” T-dog shock his head. You nodded looking at all the pears of eyes on you. Your eyes were shiny but nothing fell. You huffed and walked back to your tent. While you were upset about Merle being gone it wasn’t about that. It proved how fucked this new world was becoming. A world your child would have to be in. Suddenly being pregnant with them seemed like the safest place for them. Your thoughts of how it would suck later in pregnancy and 'couldn’t wait for it to be over' stopped. Your child is the safest it will ever be in its life. That terrifying thought scared you.

It wasn’t until later when the sun began to set that you had calmed. It was cold and you wanted to sit by a fire. People were surprised when you appeared and sat with them. You had over heard parts about what happened to Rick. But at the sight of you got them talking about Merle. It was Dale who brought it up, “Who is going to tell Daryl Dixon about his brother?” Rick glanced to you then back to Dale, “I will. I’m the one who handcuffed him.” Then T-dog shook his head, “Nah I dropped the key, makes this one mine.” Based on that information you started to piece what happened on the run. That thought stalled to a stop when Glenn stated, “Not to make it about race but maybe a white guy should tell him?” Is that what they thought about Daryl? They just assuming he is like his brother? You huff in anger, “Really Glenn? He is not racist. He’s only the person that, you know, been feeding all of you.” Glenn turned sheepish at your harsh tone. You stood, “But you know, leave his brother for dead seems like a good trade for how much he has been doing for all of you people!”

You visible deflate mood switching on a dime. You move a hand to your small bump, “Sorry I know you probably had a good reason, Merle is a hard ass.” You sunk back down enjoying the fire too much to go to bed. Rick’s voice spoke calmly, “Your pregnant.” He stated it more as a realization. You look to his shocked face, clearly thinking of how unlucky a timing it was to be. You chuckled speaking sarcastically, “Keep up with those observations and you’re sure to make detective.” His eyebrows drawn in by thought, “Merle was the father?” Disgust washing over your face, “Ew. God I take it back.” Everyone was surprised at your blatant dislike for Merle. They knew Daryl was the dad. You start to clarify, “Daryl is the dad.” You took notice of there original reaction, “Look I don’t like Merle anymore then you probably do. Half the time I don’t think Daryl does either! But he is still at the end of the day my family now.”

Peoples lack of trying to talk to you has put there own version of you in there head. They thought you were quiet and jumpy. Questioning if they did talk to you they would do more harm then good like with Carol. Now the few talks they’ve had or heard from you made sense. You were out spoken and just tired from being pregnant. You stood up again feeling awkward. “I’m going to bed, figure out what to say to Daryl. Maybe watch out for a punch or two.” So you walked off to bed. You were happy you could see Daryl in the morning, but the thought of him learning of his brother broke your heart. You tossed and turned most of the night with the thought.

The light shining through your tent lead you awake. Still trying to cling to as much sleep while feeling drowsy. Then you heard Carl and Sophia screams. You sat up and tried to get to your feet causing a wave of dizziness. The shuffling of stomping feet telling you people were running over there. You slip on shoes taking a moment to become alright with gravity again. Amy and Andrea walking away when you walked over a voice caught your attention, “Its gotta be the brain, don’t youall know nothing?” You smiled glad Daryl is back. When you turn the corner however you weren’t expecting a walker and deer to be sprawled out dead on the floor. You made eye contact with Daryl when the smell of the walker pulled a gag from you. The smile being wiped from your face as a hand comes to your mouth. You immediately turned back around and walked away.

Daryl was well aware of how sensitive your senses have become. You can’t handle anything raw at the moment. He noticed a week into the quarry how you would look at something raw, something that never bother you before, and it would make you queasy. Speaking of raw he should probably get the squirrels ready. He sighed watching you walk away with a love sick hopelessness washed on his face. Something that people have never taken notice of before. So he called for his brother to help, so he could get to you sooner. That's when all hell broke loose.

You heard the calls for Merle hearing Daryl walk back. Then you saw all the guys surround him. Then you watched him place back and forth. You knew that was a coping thing he did so you decided to stand closer. By the time you had walked over he threw the squirrels he’d caught at Rick. You didn’t even have a moment to yell his name when the former policemen jumped him and pinned him. Shane putting him in a headlock and Rick getting in his face. You yelled in displeasure,

“Get the hell off him!”

It was the loudest anyone has heard you, also the angriest. Shane had glanced to you before releasing his hold on him. Daryl sprung back up frustration clear on his face. When he turned to make sure you were behind him you caught a glimpse of his eyes becoming glassy. T-dog chimed in from the earlier conversation you didn’t hear, “It’s not his fault, I dropped the key.” Daryl’s voice strained, “You couldn’t pick it up?!” T-dog looked down guilty, "Well, I dropped it into a drain. But before I left I chained the door shut." Daryl shock his head and started to back up, "That supposed to make me feel better! Hell with all of y'all, just tell me where he is so I can go an get him." You hated to see him upset. You weren't expecting Lori to pipe p and volunteering her husband to take Daryl there. Rick said he was planning to go back anyways saying it was wrong for anything to suffer like that. Shane being the typical hard ass and self employed leader strongly disagreed. With a few others joining it was decided, they were going to get Merle back.

You were finally alone with Daryl again. He still seemed riled over everything but also you could see he was getting emotional. He was turned around facing away from you. You slowly wrapped you arms around him, holding him from behind. He slowly turned into you resting his chin on your head and arms going over your shoulders. You felt him release air, sinking into you. He try's to hide it but you see he is exhausted. You saw he felt like he had to prove something to you, or maybe just to himself. He released you with avoided eye contact. He took a moment with you and collected himself but, he was still a man on a mission.

You watch as Daryl throw things into a bag and refusing to met your eye to avoid whatever look that would break his heart. They were about to take off back to the city and into danger, so you stopped Daryl by putting your hands to his chest. He spoke before you could, "Look I have ta go get him, I know you don't want me goin-" You cut him of by grabbing his face, "When you see him again you tell him I warned his dumb ass, and when you get him back here I'm going to chew him out for this!" He looked at you stunned. You use your grip on his face to drag him into a kiss, "And you better comeback here without a scratch!" He smiled at you, eyes soft, he kissed you again.

"Yes Ma'am."

They had left hours ago and you had that uneasy feeling again. You respected Rick more then anyone else at the camp and he just got here. He was a decent guy but feel bad watching Carl's worried expression. Lori even flipped that he was going right after she herself said he was. Mood swings on that girl, and your the one whos supposed to be pregnant. Jim was off digging which concerned a few. It led to him tided to a tree for his own safety. Granted it was the only eventful thing that would probably happen today. Unless a swamp monster dragged itself out of the water you and all the girls were doing laundry in. Although Ed was a close to one. It was a welcome distraction all the same. To have girl talk again was essential to any girl and none can say other wise. Most of the girls seemed like they could now talk to you and it was a relief.

Although Andrea kinda still sucks the life out of fun, "So how did you end up pregnant?" Most girls look over to her wet laundry in hand and displeased looks by the question. You tightly rung a shirt and looked at her in the eye, "Well, I think your a little old for the birds and bees talk." That gained an eye roll from her but chuckles from the others. You smiled before giving her the answer you are sure she was trying to dig for, "I found out a day before the fall." The thought making you think of your Aunt. You continued on anyways, "Daryl and I hadn't been dating that long I'll be honest, so it wasn't exactly planned. Then I thought it was the end of the world." You look around to the thoughtful faces around you and shrugged, "Turns out I was a day off on that though." It was lighthearted from there, mentions of things that they missed from before. Carols unexpected and less then innocent choice sent waves of laughter throughout the lady's. That fun was crushed by the swamp monster known as Ed.

It lead to something you didn't expect. His sexism rubbing everyone the wrong way. Making Andrea questioned what he did instead of sitting on his ass doing nothing. Which while true and agreed with it lead to him to try to take Carol away and most likely go hit her. When Andrea challenge Ed in doing so it left a sinking feeling in you. You were uncomfortable with confrontation, probably do with the way your parents had treated you. Even with the sinking feeling you try and pull Carol behind you. The exaltation of his action were unpredictable, "Think I won't hit some pregnant whore?!" That was the first swing. It almost fully landed grazing your cheek. Carol had used the arm you had on her to tug you back before he swung. The frightened yelps and yells grabbing the attention from those farther. Carol now stood slightly in front of you, your cold damp hand moving to your warmed cheek he clipped. Ed now focused on his wife slapping her and trying to drag her away but the other girl now stepping in and clung to her. You didn't even see Shane before he pulled Ed backwards and began to lay punch after punch into him. Everyone but Carol were stunned into silence. Carols cry's and the grunts coming from the men filled the air. So many Jim wasn't the only thing that was going to happen today.

Everything was tense after that. With the amount things gone wrong and the still missing members that went to the city, moral was low among the group. Later in the evening Amy and Andrea had gone fishing catching dinner. The sun drifted closer to fully set as the fish was cooked with one question still in there minds, 'Where were they?' The smell of the fish left you gagging and need for fresher air. You found you way back to the water to dip you again swollen feet. It wasn't a unusual thing you did, you did it often. Knife in hand and legs swaying in the cool water. The light dissipated making you aware you should get back soon. You had heard laughs by the camp so moral was rising from the stressful day. You used your cold hands to press to your reddened face from almost getting flattened out by Ed. Daryl would will not be happy about that. You had pulled you feet from the water shaking the water off them to put your shoes on. Then the day got even worse. A scream ripped threw the air making you turn to the sound. You see outlines of figures in the dark. You feel fear crash into you.

'Walkers...'

There were even two coming closer to you from the woods to the side of the water. They had almost snuck up on you if you hadn't looked around because of the scream. A tremble was in your hand as you gripped the knife you had. You slowly back away, hearing gunshots off in the air. Daryl had taught you this for this moment. He had grilled this into in fear that maybe he wouldn't be around to protect you. The first walker was a thin women, the other a male missing its arm and limping. You lunged the knife into the women's eye. Your knife breaking by the blade as the women fell over dead. The snapping of the metal was like slow motion, the other walker steps away from you. You step back bare feet getting hurt by the jagged rocks. You had looked down spotting a larger rock and hurriedly pick it up.

You remember the motions Daryl had showed you for self defense but had never practiced them with him. He didn't really like the idea of rough housing with his pregnant girlfriend even if it was for your defense. You reached and tugged the one arm the walker had and tripped the thing in the motion. It was flat on the floor about to get back up and grab at you. However, rock in hand you threw downward blows one after another even after the thing stopped moving. Blood splatting all over you shirt and down your arms. The buzz of adrenalin causing your hands to violently shake when you stopped swinging. The urge to cry was strong but you notice the now slue of gunshots that had increased stop. The silence broken by the yell and worried cry for your name.

"Y/N!!!"

Your body fluttered at the sound of Daryl. Still bare foot you ran up the gravel hill and yelling back to him with a emotional in your voice, "DARYL!!!" You had made it to the top getting to see him wipe around to your voice. His crossbow dropped to the ground as you both booked it toward each other. He didn't know what to think when he couldn't find you after the last walker fell. The inability to find you cracking a desperate hole into his chest. When he heard you and saw you running to him relief flooded him. As he ran panic rose again seeing you dripping in blood. Inches apart he heard your desperate sobs before crashing into one another. He pulled you off your feet lifting you into him. His voiced stuttered out, "Are you bit?! Are you ok?!" You voice quivering as you sucked in a breath. "I'm alright-t." He felt you shaking like a leaf and whispered into you, "I've got ya, nothin is gonna hurt ya." You had barred your face into his neck now crying in relief. Daryl helped you get cleaned up, that night you clung to him while everyone 'slept'. A moment can change everything, and it was clear to everyone after today.

They were no longer safe here and things were only going to get worse.

Part 3

Feedback welcome and requests open!

Do you want to be on the taglist? Then leave a comment saying so! Taglist

@daryldixmedown @aureolinb @the1eyedmonster16 @lettersfromyourlove @felicisimor

@daryl-dixons-left-hand @sokkasimp101 @darylssextoy69 @ddixon99 @itwasntaphasema

@iluvme9 @lunajay33 @twisteduniverse5 @thestonedwriter

#daryl dixon #daryl dixon x reader #daryl fanfiction #daryl imagines #daryl x female reader #daryl x reader #norman reedus #twd daryl #angst #fluff

200 notes · View notes

dazaiandhislovelybandages · 2 days

Note

Hey girl! Since you write 2 of my fave genres and saw your're accepting requests I hope that maybe this message reaches you and you will give my idea a try. It is of course some angst to fluff with Gojo x reader. Both in their 20s (let's say JJK0), reader is pretty new to the Jujutsu world but just as strong as Satoru, super funny and sarcastic but very chill (so a bit his opposite if you will). Shoko, being close with the reader notices that she has feelings for Gojo and she doesn't confess because of fear of rejection. Things get worse when reader *thinks* she sees him flirting and tries distancing herself and wallow a bit. So maybe at the end either something happens and Gojo confesses (in his own emotionally constipated way) ooorrr Shoko *helps* out a bit by having a talk with good 'ol Gojo (or both *wink*). Either way, you take this idea, turn it, twist it, do whatever your magical talented self wants with it and you have all the love from me (you have it nevertheless ^^). Thank youu

Misunderstandings Can Often Be Helpful {Gojo Satoru}

A/n: thank you for requesting, I hope you like it

Pairing: Gojo x fem!reader

Trigger Warnings: none

Everyone who knew Gojo in a relatively more personal level could see it. Geto leaving hurt him. His wounds were still fresh and bleeding but he was now the strongest. Alone. The word didn't even feel right, refering to himself as the strongest when he had been so used to saying "we" since Geto was supposed to be always there with him. His best friend. His one and only.

But life went on and soon a new student was announced. With the only exception that you were no regular student. After the arrival of Yuta in Jujutsu Tech, Gojo had naturally expected you to be more around the first years age. The shock on his face when he learnt that you were just a few years younger than him would forever remain imprinted on your meomory... and on paper since Shoko managed to take a picture of him.

When the principal told him about you, Gojo expected to see someone with no abilities whatsoever. He knew of course that you were almost on the same level as him power-wise and from Yaga's sayings, you had no idea how to control your powers. It went without saying that he had been assigned to be your teacher since he not only was the only one who overpowered you but because he was the only one knowledgeable enough to help you understand and control your powers. That was what he told Shoko anyways.

What he didn't expect however was to get his ass kicked both physically and mentally. And all that on your first day there as well.

"Whoah, were are you going?" He quickly stood up, stretching his back. The last kick you had given him behind the knees had been enough to make him realise that turning off his limitless was a wrong decision.

"To get some water, I assumed we were taking a break? You seemed really friendly with the floor." You opened the door, ready to walk out.

"Do you usually assume a lot of things?"

"It appears as such. I assumed you were stronger in physical combat."

Now that was a hit below the belt. Apart from Geto and occasionally Shoko, no one ever had the balls to call him... weak. Gojo Satoru wasn't weak. He was the strongest!

"Damn that would have looked great on camera..." Shoko shrugged, blowing out the smoke from her cigarette.

"Are you kidding me? I don't even have time to respond! It's one sarcastic comment after another!" Gojo chuckled before shouting a 'time out' for the first years.

After that day, Shoko took a great liking in you, mostly because Gojo seemed to be getting gradually better emotionally. In fact, she went to properly meet you the very next day. And the rest was history.

You and Gojo were the only reasons why she would stay up late in her office, waiting for your training session to end, just so she can catch up with all the latest gossip brought by none other than the new strongest duo.

But Shoko was no fool. Be it after training sessions, after missions or even after some casual nights out with the two of you, she had quickly picked up on the way you looked at Gojo. It wasn't really admiration. Hanging out with his annoying ass had brought your ego to the same level as his. It wasn't the expected teacher-student dynamic either. That had long been gone after you managed to give him a black eye (accidentally obviously) during your early days of training.

It was something else, something she could say was a developing crush on the world's most annoying human being. But it was fun seeing it. Gojo knew your favourite drink by heart and would order it for you before you could even open your mouth. You would slightly blush when he would pass it on to you after the waiter mistaking it for his order. On extremely rare occasions she would catch your apologetic expression as you brought him to her office after landing him a hit that wasn't supposed to hurt him at all. Not to mention how she would notice you looking at him during your breaks. Yes, that was what sealed the deal for her.

The only problem was... Shoko knew Gojo and most importantly, she knew the reputation that surrounded him and if not the reputation then... the crowds of women. Not to be mistaken though, Geto was surprisingly far more popular with women back when Gojo and him were teens.

"You're here alone? That's a new one." She patted Maki's back, signaling for her to leave as Gojo entered the office.

"Yeah well... y/n left right after practice ended." He groaned and laid down on the cold metal bed Shoko had. "She did strain her leg though so I don't know why she refused when I offered to take her to you."

Shoko's alarms went off. You, refusing help from none other than Gojo Satoru? The guy you had a crush on for the last year now? Sure, there had been a few times here and there when you refused to help each other out of pure banter but at the end of the day, both of you walked into her office together.

"What's with that smile?" Gojo raised the left side of his blindfold just to side eye Shoko. "It's creepy."

But Shoko's life had just gotten a new meaning because the very next day she was ringing the doorbell of your apartment. She knew it was Saturday, you didn't have any missions and no practice time with Gojo so this was the perfect time to learn what had happened the night before.

Shoko wasn't someone who liked gossip. Scratch that: she wasn't someone who liked to work in order to learn the latest gossip. To his credit though, Geto always brought her something juicy. With him now gone, she was counting on you and Gojo.

"It's... 8 in the morning... what are you doing here? Why are you even up so early?" You let out a yawn and stepped aside to let her walk in your apartment.

"I need to know everything." She removed her shoes and her coat. "And when I mean everything, I mean even the tiniest bit of sweat that ran down Gojo's exposed forehead that made you not come to my office yesterday." With an air filled with nonchalance, Shoko took the ashtray you had bought specifically for her and walked towards your balcony. She knew you didn't like the smell of smoke in your house. "Come on! I need words coming out of your mouth sweetheart!"

You would have made up an excuse. Shoko knew you would, she could practically see it forming in your head but she knew you weren't going to say it. Because she was your best friend and you were hers and in the past year, the two of you had shared more secrets with each other than she had with anyone else. Yaga's hemorrhoids? You had discussed that in your first week there. Yuta's crush on Maki? Been there, said that.

"Um... I just... does he have a girlfriend?"

"No? Why?"

"Because... like..." And then you finally caved in, taking the closest chair and placing it next to the one Shoko was sitting on. "Two days ago, after we had returned from our mission, I filled in the paperwork and as I was heading to Yaga's office I saw him talking to a woman... and she seemed both serious and flirty?"

"How did she look like?" Shoko asked a little hesitantly, hoping you weren't talking about the one she thought you were talking about.

"Tall, blonde hair, she was holding a helmet."

Her assumptions had been correct. "Yuki? Tsukumo Yuki?" She turned to look at you with wide eyes and a cigarette that was hanging so loosely from her fingers that could fall in any moment. When you didn't respond, Shoko bursted out laughing. "Are you shitting me? Yuki is a special grade sorcerer. She would never... god... anyways, I have to go to the office."

That was a lie. Shoko wasn't going to the office.

Conveniently enough, yours and Gojo's apartment were as close as a fifteen minute walk so when she finally reached the fifth floor of his flat, she wasn't breathless.

"If you don't confess to that poor girl in the next hour, I will personally call her and tell her that her contact name in your phone is love. With a red heart."

"It's almost nine in the morning what are you doing here? Why are you even up so early?" He let out a yawn but unlike you, he didn't let her in so Shoko just pushed her way in. "No matter the case, I don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh you do. You have bought her kikufuku over a thousand times. Kikufuku that were meant for you!"

"I am a person who likes to share." Gojo leaned against the kitchen bar.

"He is lying." The old lady that he had hired to clean his house on Saturdays spoke, walking out of his bathroom. "He keeps following me while I clean and talks about her. I even sent her a gift on her birthday since aparently I know her better than her own mother."

Shoko's eyes widened at the sound of this new information and it wasn't long before she started throwing the apples on the kitchen counter at Gojo.

It took Gojo three minutes to put on some nice clothes and he could swear that if Shoko was tall enough to reach him, she would be dragging him to your house by his ear.

"What's-"

"Have fun!" Shoko pushed Gojo inside your apartment and before both of you could protest, she closed the door and glued her ear on it so she could listen to every single word, every single comma said between the two of you.

"How's your leg?" He asked. If anyone were to grade him right now, maybe he could get a D- for the effort.

"I'll live."

"Um... so..."

Was he nervous? Gojo Satoru, nervous. Let me rephrase that: Gojo Satoru was nervous while talking to a woman?

"You have made huge progress this past year. And I appreciate that we..."

The truth was that not even Satoru himself knew why he was so nervous. He had performed this speech for months in front of his mirror even though he knew how unlike himself this was. Gojo Satoru never rehearsed love confessions because he never needed any. The girls confessed to him, not the other way around.

"We?"

"Please calm down a little. I am trying to remember the highlighted part at the corner of the page."

No, he hadn't written anything down. Hell, he had never even completed one rehearsal of this supposed love confession. But humour came naturally to him; it was the only way Gojo knew when it came to dealing with stressful situations. Especially after Geto left.

"I am glad we are the strongest um... together."

"Sure." You brushed it off, unaware of the amount of effort this poor guy was putting into confessing.

"Great, I'll pick you up at 7."

"For what?"

"Our date?"

"What date?"

"The one I am taking you on because I just confessed and this is what couples do?" A small pause followed and Gojo could practically feel the sweat staining his forehead even though he wasn't really sweating. "No?"

"8 works better."

#gojo x reader #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru #gojo satoru fluff #satoru gojo x reader #gojo jjk #gojou satoru x reader #jjk gojo #jujutsu gojo #satoru gojo #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen masterlist #jujutsu kaisen #gojo x you #writing #anime and manga #anime #manga

99 notes · View notes

eggyrocks · 2 days

Note

Hi!! I really love your work and congrats on getting 500 followers!! i was wondering if you could write #83 with mattsun?? thank you!!

yes yes yes i love this prompt fhjdkjkhlj i hope i do it justice

500 follower special: #83 “It’s always been you.”

mattsun x gn reader, friends to lovers, party setting, language, not proofread

written content masterlist

They picked a bathroom to hide in, them and Matsukawa. Outside the closed and locked bathroom door, is a crowd of drunk people listening to loud, bad music with the lights off. But inside that small, cramped bathroom, they sit with their back against the edge of the bathtub, legs stretched out towards Matsukawa, who leans against the opposite wall, his legs resting on top of theirs.

They like it better like this. When it's just them.

"Oikawa's gonna be mad at you," they say casually, holding a plastic cup up to their lips as they speak, trying to hide their self-satisfied grin. "This is the third person he's tried to set you up with that you've bailed on."

Matsukawa snickers, arms loosely crossed over his chest. Out there somewhere is his 'date,' probably bored and probably looking for him. They almost feel bad for whoever it is. They would feel worse if Matsukawa hadn't explicitly told Oikawa not to do this again.

And maybe they're just a little too overjoyed that he's here with them, again, instead of Oikawa's matchmaker experiment, to feel bad. Maybe their chest is fluttering at the idea that they're Matsukawa's first choice for company.

"Who cares? He's always up in arms about something," Matsukawa shrugs. "He'll get over it."

There's a knock on the door. Three loud, impatient bangs. "Occupied!" they call out to whoever's on the other side, not looking away from Matsukawa as they do.

From the other side, there's a groan, and retreating footsteps. Neither one of them feel too bad; they've got several other options, in a house like this.

"What about you?" Matsukawa asks, nodding his head in their direction. "Didn't you ditch the guy you came here with?"

That they do feel a bit bad for. The what's-his-name they showed up with seemed nice enough, they figured. And they had resolved before showing up to this stupid party that they would at least make an honest effort to stay by his side for the majority of the night.

But all it took was one look at Matsukawa from across the room, and they abandoned all of their resolve. All he had to do was smirk, and they were trailing behind him, obedient.

It always ends up like this. Just them.

"Eh," they respond with a shrug of their own, placing their cup on the floor beside them. "I don't think he's really my type."

Matsukawa scoffs. "You say that about everyone. I'm starting to think no one's your type."

Heat creeps up their neck. "Yeah, well you reject every-"

There's more knocks on the door, these ones more aggressive. Matsukawa lifts a leg off of theirs and jams the heel of his foot into the door. "Occupied," he says, voice low and not too concerned.

"Oikawa's looking for you two fuckers," the voice from the other side of the door, and they immediately recognize it to be Iwaizumi's. "And if he keeps annoying me about it, I'm gonna tell him where you are."

"Got it," Matsukawa calls back, eyes still heavy on them as he speaks. "Thanks Iwa."

They can hear Iwaizumi scoff as he retreats. Matsukawa gestures for them to continue. "Go on," he instructs.

"I was just saying," they continue, almost wishing they didn't have to; it's a dangerous line of conversation, "you can't really talk, since you've turned down every single person that's ever been interested in you."

And there's this sort of shift in the way Matsukawa looks at them. He lowers his gaze, and he leans forward, just a touch. "Have you ever thought," he starts, his voice shooting right through them, "that maybe there's a reason for that?"

They're not sure if their desperation for him is making them imagine something that's not there, for if there's a new light in his eyes, that he's looking at them differently. They swallow. "You're picky, is what I always thought."

Matsukawa sighs, and leans back against the wall. "Nah, you're way off."

"Well, then tell me," they insist, and now they're the one inching closer. There's a light knock on the door once more. "Fuck off," they spit out unceremoniously. "What's the reason, Issei?"

He raises an eyebrow. "Why do you wanna know so bad?" he questions.

Their face flushes, and they suddenly feel caught. They force themself to relax, shoulders slumping. "I mean, I dunno. I guess it's just...interesting."

Matsukawa removes his legs from theirs and sits cross-legged in front of them, inching closer. "What's so interesting about it, then?"

The small space of the bathroom suddenly feels much hotter than it did before, like the bright, yellow lights are heating up and burning them. Matsukawa does not once look away from them. "Is it so bad to wanna know things about you?" they question, unable to think of anything else reasonable when he's looking at them like that.

He looks over the details of their face, eyes roaming from the bridge of their nose to their shinning eyes to the curve of their lips. They feel like they can't breathe, when he looks at them like that. "I guess not," he answers softly and evenly. "It's you."

Their mouth feels like it's full of sand. "What?"

Matsukawa reaches forward and loops his fingers around the belt loops of their jeans, and he pulls them closer, sliding them against the tiled floor until their nose almost touches his. The sudden proximity makes their breath catch in their throat.

"I don't want them because they're not you," he says, eyes lowered.

Their eyes are wide and fixed on his, heart beating rapidly in the base of their throat. And they've lost all grip on their thoughts, head now full of buzzing static. All they can focus on his Matsukawa, and the way their body reacts to him.

"The reason I reject everyone is you," he tells them. "It's always been you."

For a moment, his words hang in the air. They don't settle in. They won't really settle in for a while. All that matters to them now is the way Matsukawa is looking at them, eyes intense and unwavering, "Issei," they finally breathe out, able to manage it because his name is one of the few comprehensible thoughts spinning in their head. "I want you."

The words come from them without much consideration of their meaning or implication, but it's true. They do want him. They've always wanted him. And it doesn't take much else for Matsukawa to smirk, and reach his hands up to cup their face, gently pulling them in closer.

And then-

"You two!" Oikawa's voice from the other side of the door rings out, accompanied by his fists slamming against the wood. "I am so sick of you two! Get out here and socialize with everyone else for once! God, with the amount of them you guys have been hiding you better've hooked up by now!"

Matsukawa doesn't even react, like he doesn't even hear the words of his friend as his eyes flutter shut, and his lips finally crash against theirs.

an: another one down....im afraid i'll be writing these forever......(also first time writing mattsun pls let me know what u think im afraid lmafo)

taglist: @wyrcan @thechaosoflonging @publicbathroompanic @bedeater @rottingt1tz @rintarawr @deluluforcarlos55 @ahseyy @localgaytrainwreck @cherrypieyourface @baskin-robinhoods @polish-cereal @iheartamora @ferntv @eclecticeggknightpsychic @httpakkeiji @does-directions @pinkiscool @michivrse (complete form linked in navigation to be added pls, send me a msg if you would like to be removed)

(my first time remembering to tag ppl in written content <3)

#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu #haikyuu fluff #hq x reader #hq x you #hq #mattsun x reader #mattsun x yn #mattsun x you #matsukawa issei #hq matsukawa #matsukawa x reader #matsukawa fluff #haikyuu matsukawa #matsukawa issei x reader #matsukawa issei x yn

100 notes · View notes

polly-pocket13 · 2 days

Text

Give me a chance to show you how beautiful you are

bakugou katsuki x fem!chubby!reader

tw: weight, self-doubt, self-hate, eating disorder, cursing, acne, bad english and bad grammar

a/n: just a friendly reminder that you are enough and beautiful just the way you are.

You are standing in front of your mirror and looking at yourself.

You sighed.

Your skin is getting worse again.

You gained weight.

Your tights are too thick.

Your belly is too chubby.

Your arms to giggly.

Slowly, your eyes started to tear up.

Why couldn't you be like the other pretty girls?

Those girls with the flat stomachs and clear skin.

Those girls with beautiful tights and slim arms.

Those girls who always look and act like a real lady.

Those girls who always seem perfect.

The next day, you started eating less and exercising more.

You began to isolate yourself from others and feel more and more ashamed about yourself.

Like right now, you were in your room again and stood before your mirror and looked at your imperfect body.

“Y/N? Is everything okay?” you suddenly heard Bakugous voice behind you.

You didn't even notice that he knocked or entered your room.

“Bakugou, what are you doing here? Of course, everything is alright.” you told him and forced yourself to smile.

“Y/N, stop fucking lying to me. I can see that something is wrong, and I can see how, you force yourself to smile. I have known you long enough, to recognize a real smile.” he grumbled.

“I don't know what you mean.” you said to him.

“Don't play dumb, Y/N. Please tell me what is wrong.” he spoke to you.

“I am fine.” you lied again.

You weren't fine at all.

“Fine? You look to me like the absolute opposite of fine.” he said to you angrily.

You were overwhelmed with emotions.

You slowly started to speak, “Can't you see? I am the problem. How I look. How I act. Everything about me is just imperfect.”

You started to cry again.

“Who the hell told you such a bullshit. Tell me so I can break his nose.” he told you aggressive.

You replied quietly, “Kacchan, just forget it.”

“You don't want me to know? Well, then I will find out myself. It can't be that fucking hard to find an asshole without eyes.” he slightly shouted and wanted to leave your room.

“It was me, okay! I tell my self everyday I am not enough! So if you want to break someone's nose, feel free to break mine.” you said to him.

He immediately turned himself to you. A second later, you could feel his arms wrapped around you.

Now, you started to cry even more.

He pulled you closer to him.

He whispered in your ear, “You are the most beautiful woman I have ever met in my life.”

“You only say it because we are friends and I am crying. You don't mean it.” you mumbled.

“Tsk, stupid gorgeous Woman. Why don't you believe me? I would not fall in love with you if you were not the most perfect human being in the world,”

he started tell you.

“I wished you could see yourself through my eyes. Then you would see that you are perfect from the bottom to the top.

You would see how your eyes sparkle, when you talk about something you love. How you smile makes everyone else smile too. How you just make everyone else to a better person, especially me. You would see how all stare at you if you dress up in your pretty dresses. Damn it, Y/N yo drive me crazy every day. Your curves, your beautiful thighs, your soft belly. Just fucking everything.” he ends his “speech”.

You were shocked. You just stared at him for a moment.

“You like me? Like, really like me.” you asked him.

“Typical Y/N. I told you lots of other important things and you just remembered one. Yes, I like you. Like, really like you.” he answered you.

“I think I like you too, but I can't see myself through your eyes. I am just imperfect for me.” you told him.

“Give me a chance to show you how beautiful you are. Okay?” he asked you.

“Okay.” you answered.

Since that day, he has been proving to you every day how beautiful you are to him.

And you slowly start to believe him and love yourself as you should because you are truly beautiful just the way you are.

#bakugou x reader #katsuki bakugo x reader #bakugou x you #bakugou x y/n #bnha x you #bnha #mha x reader #bnha x reader #boku no hero academia #bakugou x reader angst #mha angst #mha bakugou #bnha angst #bakugou katsuki #bnha bakugou #bakugou angst #bakugo fluff

86 notes · View notes

knightyoomyoui · 15 hours

Text

[SMUT COMMISSION] TWICE Jeongyeon x Male Reader - "Just The Way You Are"

Word Count: 15,169 Tags: virgin sex, BODY WORSHIP AND POSITIVITY, dominant and submissive, roleplay, honeymoon, rough sex, vanilla sex, angst, fluff, smut etc. WARNING: contains smut, R+18, mature and sexual content, curse words

Here's my very first commissioned fic featuring our lovely angel Yoo Jeongyeon of TWICE requested to me by @devittobushi, a huge thank you once again for giving me the opportunity to write a commission for you! This has one objective in mind, and that is show lots of love and appreciation for Jeongyeon's current appearance through YN who will stand as Jeongyeon's best man in this story , so for those bitter body shamers of her... yall ain't allowed here with us who will still support her all the way along, unless yall wanna change. In addition, this marks my LONGEST one-shot work EVER, surpassing my Dahyun x Male Reader oneshot "Everlasting Love" from TWICE: Book Of One-Shots x Reader with 13,056 word count. Enjoy reading and I hope I did well on my first commission fic!

START

It was 9:29 PM in the evening. You are a veterinarian who is operating the only open and available pet clinic through a street in Seoul. Tonight,you are entertaining your last client who happens to visit your place to seek some assistance regarding his pet dog who is a chihuahua having some stomach issues.

“How is he, doctor?” The owner named Mr. Park asked nervously after you finished checking-up his dog, putting down your stethoscope.

“She is stable now. Nothing need to be worried about, sir.” You calmly said. “It wasn’t that life-risky, but it could’ve went worse if you didn’t happen to rescue her on time.”

“Yeah, good luck that it was my day off today that’s why I got to stay home and be with my Blossom for today.” The owner explained how was he able to atleast send her dog to the clinic. “Anyways, how is the result doc?”

"So, like I said, it was that much worse, but this isn’t a joke either. This has to be treated immediately,” you said as you felt sympathy for Blossom. “May I ask you something? Do you happen to notice something unusual about your dog that made her be like this? ”

He shook his head after quite a while of posing himself and thinking deeply. “No, Doc, I don’t remember at all. She was just fine to me, as from what I can see about her, how she moves from the last few days, but unlike earlier... she just started moaning and barking deeply enough to make me panic and scared for her.”

“Hmmm okay.” You nodded, but your theory wasn’t satisfied yet. “Did she occur to inspect something from outside your place?”

“None. My dog is too meek and quiet. She wasn’t that kind of pet that is so active enough to be a pain in the ass.” He replied. “Why, was there something wrong about it?”

“What about his eating habits, still nothing?”

You remained silent as you watched Blossom sleeping while free from pain. “She eats a lot. I mean literally SO MUCH that she exceeds the average amount of dog foods she had to consume everyday.”

“How much she ate in a day?”

“Four? Sometimes it gets higher than that.”

“Jesus, now it makes sense.” You cursed under your breath. “Oh you hungry softball, you better chill a little bit.”

You patted her belly and caressed her head before you returned your focus at her owner.

“Blossom has stomach issues, Mr. Park. It may have not been for their overexposure to waste and mess but instead for her overpassing the limit on how should a dog in a breed like her should regularly eat.” You revealed to him the specific details of your findings.

“She may have eating delicious and fitting dog food for her body but that doesn’t mean she can just take it all as much as she wants.” You continued. “Blossom’s overeating made the symptoms to form and turn into gastroenthritis.”

“I really thought at first she is pregnant.” He gasped.

“No, sir. Her belly bloated because of too much intake of food, and the undigested inside her stomach causing it to pile up and not letting the blood and the oxygen flow around their body. Their digestive system might got disturbed the more this keeps going on. It might also get infected with bacterias from the waste of all those she took and could make her gastric worsen.”

“And now that she’s here, that should mean it got prevented, right?”

“You have to less worry for her, I made her comfortably rest because I couldn’t imagine how painful it is for her to hold it in.” You said, glancing at Blossom’s sleeping state. He huffed in relief at the good news.

“I just have one advice for you, monitor and control what she eats next time. It might lessen the risk other having stomach issues, okay?”

“Got it. Thank you very much, doctor.” He nodded and bowed down in respect for you. “I’m really glad that there’s a place here already where I can go and prevent travelling far away just to search for a pet clinic.”

“You’re welcome, sir.” You humbly responded.

“Actually, lucky for you I was about to start packing up until you showed up. Talking about perfect timing.”

He chuckled and shook his head. “Yeah, it was really fortunate of me to have something like this located nearby at my place, and it is the only pet clinic too.”

Those words effectively motivated him, and you preached of them because he felt like he had a bright purpose that had to be done in a place where something like this unique of a service, especially for the residents who own pets at home to go through once there was a sudden emergency.

“Anyways, I’ll just gonna pick up the papers to seal this deal up. Please wait for a while.” You gently said as you left the owner have some alone time with his beloved pet.

You returned back from your office carrying the clipped papers containing infos about Blossom’s condition, consent from the owner that the patient must stay here for continous check up and lastly the bills of the medication he has to pay for.

He signed all of them and ended their brief meeting with a mutual agreement. He lavished you again with lots of gratitude before he bids goodbye to his let and left the place, leaving you alone again in your own personal space.

“Cmon, Blossom. Let's get you somewhere safe and comfy,” you said as you carefully carried the chihuahua and placed her in one of the vacant cages filled with blankets.

After you successfully didn’t disturb her peaceful rest, you decided to divert your attention now to prepare yourself for going home. You switched the placard from "Come in, we’re OPEN" to "Sorry, we are CLOSED" so that no more clients would appear and beg to make another request at the very last second.

While putting back all the things to their necessary spots, your vision garnered attention by the appearance of a black van stopping from your client. It became more familiar when a woman stepped out and bid farewell to her fellow staff.

She turned around and started walking towards the door. Sporting furrowed brows and a confused smile, you had to witness her figure becoming more visible as she opened the door and removed her bag to be placed on one of the seats.

There she was, your girlfriend, standing in front of you. One of the idols and members of the worldwide popular K-Pop girl group TWICE is Yoo Jeongyeon herself.

“Good evening, my YN! ”She slowly walked at you, and you were startled when she immediately hugged you while in her baggy coat. She buries her head on your shoulder, and you watched her submerge herself into your contact.

“Hey, my Jeongie.” You rubbed her back. “You look really tired. You should’ve gone home already and gotten a rest rather than coming here, especially since you’re doing dance practices for your group’s comeback. Save some more energy. ”You reprimanded here with pure concern audible in your voice, as you mentioned how busy and working hard for their new single More and More.

“Ehh, why do you sound like you don’t want me to be here.” she sulked. “Well that’s why I came here for, you’re my battery YN.” Her voice was muffled, but you can already guess that one of your girlfriend’s usual behavior is to either tease you or she gets easily sulk and sad at whatever that has something to do within her actions that wasn’t entirely right makes her disturbed.

“No, ofcourse I love to see you too and I’m glad you’re okay. I just hope you could’ve thought of yourself for now because you needed it. I just care about you, Jeongyeon. You know that because that’s how I love you so much.” You caressed her long blonde hair, feeling her silky length sliding between your fingers as you pressed the side of your head against her.

“Sweet as always, heh.” Jeongyeon smiled and wiggled her face more at the broadness of your shoulder and seethed in your fragrant scent. “But you said it anyways that what’s important for you is my own sake and what should I do about it. Well, I decided to come here and see you because I can’t be alone there at the house while waiting for you. I can’t rest at ease without having you on my side, you know that.” Your clingy and soft girlfriend spoke about her defense.

“Do you really miss me that much? We just saw each other earlier in the morning.” You chuckled.

“That wasn’t enough, okay? We haven’t been able to spend some time together because of how busy we’ve been. You can’t blame me for needing you.” She reminded you why she was this eager tonight to have your affection. You smiled, as you appreciated how you felt so important for her life right now.

“I love you, Jeongyeon.” The only words you can reply at your loss of other words to tell. You hugged her tightly and kissed her temple.

“Love you more, my YN.” She giggled kissed you in the cheek.

“You good now?”

“Mmhhmm.”

“Alright, we can continue this at home sp lemme fix these up and we’re all good to go.” You said, breaking your embrace with her.

“Let me help you-”

“Nope, you stay here missy and rest. I can handle this.” You know how much of a clean freak your girlfriend is and you appreciate her consideration to help you, but like you said, her own sake is what that matters the most for you.

She must be really exhausted. You can feel how her heartbeat and her breathing were all racing. And if you say that, you mean that at all because obviously you and anybody should not underestimate how hard it is to be a K-Pop idol, and you have always alluded Jeongyeon for carrying such a heavy career.

Although before she was able to reach the seat, she paused and asked you again. “Uhh YN-nie where are the boys?”

“At the back, sleeping.” You pointed with your thumb.

“Owkieee” She went first to head through the direction to your office. You returned all the things back to their respective locations before you followed her and watched her from the doorframe.

Jeongyeon has cautiously opened the cage and pulled the tray to expose her two boys, which are technically her two pet dogs named Nanan and Peanut, both quietly sleeping, along with the rest of the pets here slated to be under your supervision and care while they are receiving treatment.

She has entrusted it to you to take care of them since her other pet, a cat named Bomb, is already with her parents. She was supposed to take them to her sister Seungyeon, who usually guards them, but sadly, as an actress, she is currently busy filming her upcoming TV show. Her other sister, Seoyeon, couldn’t do the same since she’s mostly focused on officework.

Fortunately, she has another special person in mind who has this quality that he shares with hers and finds it a huge green flag for her ideal man that she can trust for her pets. That’s one of the ways you were able to win her heart one day.

Unbeknownst to her, as you continue to watch your loving girlfriend act like a mother to her two kids, it makes your mind travel back to that one unforgettable memory that serves as the beginning of how you and her ended up to what you two are now currently in your relationship status as a couple.

FLASHBACK

1 YEAR AGO

You were busy treating one of your patients when the chime rang, signaling that the door had been opened by somebody. Your head turned to the open pathway as it stole your attention.

Leaving your medication station, you left to see your new client.

Stepping out of the doorframe, you stopped as you saw that the client turned out to be a woman. She was wearing a mask with an outfit composed of a mint-green t-shirt with leggings and some clean-looking rubber shoes. Her dog was in her arms.

“Good morning, maam. Are you gonna set an appointment?” You greeted the lady.

“Good morning too, doc. Ahh yes, please.” She nodded and slowly rocked her pet dog in her arms.

“How can I help you?”

“My dog is sick. He’s burning in fever and I don’t have anyone else to take care of her. I’m a busy woman these days.” Her voice was fully of softness and worry as she looks down at her poor dog.

“Wait a second, please. I’ll just gonna return my patient back to her cage.” You said before you made an instant action regarding her concern.

After doing what you said, you returned to the woman and instructed her. “Follow me, please.”

You and the lady ended up at the medication station to conduct a brief check-up on her dog. After removing the thermometer, you checked to see the temperature, and the result got you worried for the dog too.

“104 degrees Fahrenheit. That’s high. She does have a fever,” you said, placing the back of your hand against its body. “She’s very hot at the moment; we have to give her medicine immediately to decrease the heat in her body.”

The woman nodded, and she just let you do your own thing as part of your expertise as a veterinarian. You injected something into the dog, and its speedy breathing somehow calmed down.

“This should do. It’ll get her to take it again after 7 hours.” You informed the lady.

“Thank you so much, doc.” She bowed in gratitude.

“Okay, follow me so that you can log off and we can process the papers.”

You and her went to your desk next. She was sitting in front of you at the guest seat. “May I clarify something? Are you perhaps alone right now in your property?”

“Yes, but actually I somehow stay sometimes on my other houses than my own dorm, my sisters and my parents.” She answered. You muttered to yourself that this lady is very rich.

“Are your sister and your parents aren’t available to manage her… oh wait, what’s your pet name?”

“Peanut.”

“Cute. I see why you came up with that name.” You joked as you remembered her color, and you immediately understood the point of the origin. She also chuckled at how guilty she was.

“Okay so why was there nobody to atlesst assist Peanut for the meantime? Are all of them unavailable?”

“Yes, doc. My sister is busy also at her work and my parents… well they also do have business on their own but mostly my mom is already guarding my two other pets. I just don’t want to bring more burden at them so I decided to take Peanut here.” She explained.

“Good idea. I can assure you that Peanut will be back on her good condition again.” You said confidently. Her cheeks widened, indicating that she must be smiling behind the mask at your positive words.

“Can I get your name, maam?”

“Y-Yoo Jeongyeon.”

You were about to land the ballpoint of your pen onto the chart when your brows furrowed as it clicked on your sense that hearing that name hit you a familiarity.

“Come again?”

“I know you heard me, doc. You must be recognizing me now.” She giggled shyly.

Your mouth agaped and let out an ‘ooh’. “What a pleasant surprise. This has to be the first time I get to face a famous celebrity visiting my clinic.” You laughed. “You’re Jeongyeon of TWICE, am i correct?”

“Yes.”

“Pleasure to meet you.”

“This won’t do help anymore anyways.” She removes her mask. Her full visual is now visible to you, and wow she must be also the most beautiful client you have ever encountered so far in your time here.

The hand that you’re presenting at her for a handshake flinched as soon as you saw her face in full display. Jeongyeon accepted your hand, and your body shivered at her warm touch passed on you.

“Pleasure to meet you too, doc. I could tell this might be your first time… or you’re a fan?”

“Ahh… sorry for this but I’’ll go with the first one.” You cautiously said on her, fearing that she might get offended at your explaination after. “Not actually to consider myself a fan, I do have listened to some of your songs and it’s pretty good but I’m just not that invested much at K-Pop” you said in an apologetic tone.

“No, it’s fine doctor. I’m actually glad that I can atleast be able to have a conversation with somebody by just being simply as myself and not this famous image that I’ve built for myself.” She said.

“You’re right, and if that’s what makes you comfortable, then I would be willing to give you that, Ms. Yoo.”

You and Jeongyeon proceeded to finalize the necessary informations before you made it clear to her that Peanut must stay here for an estimated 3 days since you still have an available slot left for pets to remain at your workplace for stricter guidance and medication.

Jeongyeon agreed on that and appreciated your service again before she bids your farewell. Once she left, you breathed out deeply, astounded that you had just interacted with an idol and, at the same time, had such an attractive lady like Jeongyeon.

The next day, Jeongyeon went to visit again at an earlier time compared to yesterday to gain an update on Peanut, and fortunately, you brought some good news. Although Prsnut is still sick, you informed her that she is now stable and that her temperature has improved.

After getting to look at Peanut, who is resting, Jeongyeon decided to spare her breaktime from her work by engaging in some conversation with you, away from the honorifics, and rather as two people genuinely getting acquainted with each other.

They explore topics like Jeongyeon sharing her interest on opening a pet clinic too if she wasn't an idol because she likes animals too, particulary dogs and cats, you being not that much of a K-Pop fan, and some other common and difference between each other.

That’s where she learned as the mood shifted when you brought up about the fact that he's unsure if his clinic will remain here for long when Jeongyeon expressed her interest to come back here again because you told Jeongyeon that his rent exceeded due and he already got a warning from the landlord. He wanted to pay but he is struggling to attain the required money, now that it gotten higher than the previous amount of rent.

You also added that you are currently trying to search for other vacant places where you can move your clinic to escape the heavy rent.

Jeongyeon was saddened by it and hoped that things would go well for him. Little did you know, though, that when she returned again for the last day to pick up Peanut, she actually took note of it and surprised you with a reward for helping her.

“Uhm n-no Miss Yoo thank you so much for this but… I can’t accept this. This is too much, I’m just doing my work.” You respectfully refused her offer.

“No, you deserve it, that’s why, and I can see that you are a gooand easygoing with. We can be friends if you’ll even like that more.” Jeongyeon grinned and shrugged. Her invitation to welcome you to a much more explorable and closer connection with her has shocked you to the core.

You must be one of the luckiest people in the world because, despite being a stranger, you had no idea that, as you crossed paths with a huge name like Jeongyeon, you didn’t expect at all that you'd be able to make friends with her. All you knew at first was that this whole thing was just going to be a one-off experience.

“That’s why I’m doing this. I can respect your refusal, but you know I would like it better if you’ll give it more time to think and… accept this.” She smiled and handed you a card. “This is my number, contact me when you make up your mind.”

She just left you speechless as she exits your clinic. You gulped and let out a gasp as you view Jeongyeon’s business card in your possession. Remembering her advice, you did contemplated about the offer for the entirety of the night. The next day, a one call away was all it took for Jeongyeon to get the go signal.

You and Jeongyeon visited the place, and it did match your liking. What she did after overwhelmed you when she said that she'd be the one to buy it for you, and all of the embarrassment and humbleness overflow at Jeongyeon’s initiative to help you.

But you have no choice but to accept; after all, this is already such a wonderful free treat coming from a kind-hearted woman like Jeongyeon. You accepted it, and Jeongyeon made the payment. Now she has also assisted you to relocate with the help of some movers and establish this place your official new clinic.

Because of this wholesome exchange that you and Jeongyeon made possible, this became the gateway to an opportunity when, as days went on, their bond grew until they started to feel something more for each other. That’s when Jeongyeon realized that there was another reason why she was so open to getting closer to you: she finds you interesting.

Then one day, being a true man, you were the one who submitted and initiated the first move by confessing what you feel for her despite anxious and fear. It was all washed away when Jeongyeon shockingly accepted, marking the beginning of their relationship as a couple. BACK TO THE PRESENT

You took Jeongyeon home right away after closing the clinic. Reaching your own safe haven together, you act through your words that you will help your exhausted girlfriend relax by giving her a proper massage before joining her on the bed for a deep slumber.

A week later, they have already reached the D-day for their comeback release titled More and More. You attended their first scheduled music show performance to promote their new title track and the album, belonging to the ones who were committed to appear at the studio very early in the morning since that’s the scheduled time for the idols to tape their performance before the live voting hours later.

As much as you wanted to accompany your girl at the moment, you knew that she’s getting assisted right now by her staff. You were feeling so enthusiastic and motivated to do everything for Jeongyeon today, and what came after surely didn’t have yourself to blame for why you’re being like this.

Exactly as they achieved their first win based on the combination of both live voting and the other criteria's result, it also coincided as your first anniversary together, making this day with her even more special.

Rushing through the backstage after one of the managers helped you to pass through the guards, you met Jeongyeon and greeted her with a tight hug and a proud kiss for her additional achievement today.

“Congratulations, Jeong. Oppa’s so proud of you, darling.” You said very close to her ear after kissing her in the temple and stroking her hair from behind. Jeongyeon’s breathed deepened and you felt her body trembled at her chuckle.

“Thank you, YN. Another thing for us to celebrate, isn’t it?”

“Yeah we will. So better wrap up your schedule for today because we are going to spend this day really well.” You said, staring at her with an excited grin. “Have you already told your managers about it?”

“Yeah I did. They allowed me. However, since they’re gonna move the rest of what we’re supposed to do today onto the next day, our schedule will be heavier.” Jeongyeon frowned at the consequences.

“O-oh no… wait, are you sure you’re still up-”

“Don’t worry about me, and us oppa. The girls are fine with it. They know how important this day is for us. Right, girls?” Jeongyeon acknowledged her sense of having others listening to your conversation with her at the moment and she was right. As she turned her head around, you and her caught the girls peeking at the door with their busted reactions.

They all gestured with thumbs ups and nods, even sending their congratulations for your first anniversary with Jeongyeon. You thanked them before facing your girl back.

“Time is running, let’s get going shall we?”

Jeongyeon hurriedly went to their dressing room and packed her things before she joined you and left the studio along with the bodyguards to shield you both against the fans who might trap you two in a stampede.

As you escorted Jeongyeon to the car, you thanked the bodyguards before entering too and awakening the engines to drive off through your first destination.

From afternoon to evening, you and her went to Gwangjang Market since her request was that she would love to have a food trip with all the street food they could get. You understood immediately her love for street food, so you granted it, taking her there and letting yourself get dragged along to wherever food stalls could attract her.

In the middle of a cold evening, you and Jeongyeon strolled along the uphills, where the scenery of the city was almost visible. Standing on one of the balconies, you savored this peaceful moment with the most precious woman in your life with some random talks about topics that can amuse both of you until it went to the most important aspect of why you brought her here.

You handed a box at Jeongyeon. When she opened it, her eyes lighted at the sparkling object laid neatly in front of her. It was a necklace that Nayeon recommended for you to buy when she shared that Jeongyeon was staring the most at this one while they were shopping. Even though she can buy it easily, she decided not to because their purpose on that time was to buy things that they needed the most in their dorm.

“YN… this is beautiful. I- I really appreciate this, you really searched for the place just to get this for me?” Jeongyeon’s expression went mellow for you.

“You know I will do everything just to make you happy, Jeongyeon.”

Jeongyeon hugged you and kissed you in the cheek. “Thank you so much, babe. I’ll wear this often.”

“Oh you better be. It suits you.”

“But wait, you think you’re the only one who has a gift prepared?” She smirked and slowly placed the box of the necklace on her bag.

“And what do you have for me too, missy?” You returned the same gesture as her.

“But first, let me drive this time. I want to show you it by myself.”

You had no issues with her request, and you just let her sit in the driver's seat while you’re the one on the passenger list this time. Jeongyeon parked the car in one of the parking lots in a hotel building, and you just kept yourself silent, keeping your questions as to why the two of you went here.

Reaching the final storey as they exit the elevator, you were perplexed as to why there’s only one room left. Jeongyeon pulled out the keys and unlocked the door. The interior of the unexpectedly huge and spacious room made your jaw almost drop to the floor.

“J-jeongyeon, w-what are we doing in here? Is this y-yours?” You said as you roam your eyes around the surrounding of the room.

“Correction: ours… but technically, it’s mainly for you, YN.” Jeongyeon placed her bag on the couch and gripped both of your arms. “Because this whole place was effectively bought and signed in for ownership under the name of… YN LN.”

“W-what?” Your eyes widened at Jeongyeon’s reveal. “You s-serious? Does that mean-”

“Mmmhhmm… this is all yours, mister.” Jeongyeon hummed and nodded. “You don’t have to travel farther from our house to your clinic because is this just few roads away from there. No more hassle for you.”

“This is… wow. This is awesome. Thank you a lot, truly. You’re making me feel like I’m the luckiest guy in the world.”

“Well you must be. Not only you own such a luxurious place like this but it will be never compared to that one rare and outstanding thing that you possess the most, and that is my heart. And I’m glad that you’re handling it with care, my love.”

“I just can’t broke it. I can’t seem to hurt you, Jeong.” You tucked her hair behind her ear. You and Jeongyeon shared a passionate kiss again before Jeongyeon pushed you to speak something in addition.

“Since we now live together here… that means we can do whatever we want here tonight, right?” Jeongyeon smirked as her voice slowly gets lower along with her touch from your shoulder slipping down to your chest.

“J-jeong…”

“And this place is yours, then that means you’re the one in-charge…” She starts to remove the buttons of your polo.

“Jeong, are you sure you want to do this?”

“Yes, I trust you, YN.” was her only response. She has fully spread your clothing open, revealing your pecs and toned abs. Her breath got stuck in her throat for a while before she licked her lips. “It will be my first time too with you, so be gentle for me oppa, please.”

Confirming that she is indeed prepared to initiate this kind of activity with you, you have decided to join along with her plan. “I promise you that, baby. Oppa’s going to take care of you tonight.”

You pulled her head towards you to land another kiss, but it was still passionate until it got mixed up by some little intensity and heat built up from both parties. Reaching for the zipper on the back of her black dress, you pulled it down and slowly removed it from her body while your lips were still entangled with hers.

Dropping the dress on the floor, she is now only sporting a black laced bra on top, her warm, milky skin now in contact with yours. You released from the kiss, allowing her gasp from your hands wandered around her back and arm, along with some slight squeezes there.

Kneeling down on the floor, you unhooked the only button present that holds her waistband before pulling down her skirt onto her ankles. Looking up to her, you saw the distinct shy blush formed in her cheeks as she stared at your face on an equal level with her panty-covered pussy.

Helping her take off the skirt from her ankles as she lifts both her feet, your hands then ran through the length of her astonishingly sculpted long legs, enough to qualify for a model’s quality. The movement ended exactly at her bubbly ass, giving it a light squeeze and inserting your finger inside the hem of her pants, moving it again back and forth.

Jeongyeon yelped at your fingernails raking her sensitive ass. Standing back up to your feet, you cupped her cheeks and kissed her again shortly before you grabbed her arms and led her to join you on the bed. Sitting first on the mattress, you silently instructed her to stack herself next on your lap.

Facing you with her sexy body, Jeongyeon starts to grab both sides of your head to kiss you deeply and nuzzle onto your neck, peppering it with some sucking and licking, wanting to show you that she owns you. You did the same thing for her to return the favor, inhaling her pleasant smell and dragging your lips across the surface of her neck and her dazzling collarbones before you kissed each inch of her shoulders.

Your fingers tugged against the strap of her bra; it slid down to the cups until it located the clip on the front. Unhooking it, you set off the bra from the sides, revealing her perky B-cup-sized breasts for you, ready to be indulged by her admirer.

Not wasting any more time, you quickly sucked her pinkish nipples, giving them equal treatment as you gnawed her tits left to right. Jeongyeon mewled as she savors the feeling of your tongue coating her nipples with saliva. To add more satisfying feeling, you joined her hands in action by groping both of her milkers while you patiently devour them.

As you buried your face in her wonderful cleavage, your hands then went at her back and ass to massage them until the wetness forming under Jeongyeon’s pants encouraged her to start grinding at your crotch.

Jeongyeon pushes you to the bed, laying you down on the mattress. Having her on top of you, she immediately had her sight next to your pants, still distractingly covering her prize.

Unbuckling your belt and tugging your pants away, she left you with your boxers remaining.

The view of the outline of your hardened length made Jeongyeon dazed in lust and desire of having you to herself. To satisfy her craving, she finally unveiled your veiny thick cock standing at 8 inches proud for her. She licked her lips deliciously at its delectable size.

“Fuck, you’re so big, baby. Woah, I don’t know if this will fit inside of me.” She ran her finger nails on the underside of your shaft. You cursed out at how sensitive your cock is at the ticklish feeling of what Jeongyeon is doing.

She just cackled devilishly as she noticed pre-cum starting to drip out from your crotch. “Oh, no. We can’t just let it waste like that. Lemme clean it up for you, baby.” She starts to lift your cock with her slender hands and licked the puddle of pre-cum on your skin.

Her eyes then marveled at the humongeous size of your cock around her fist, rattling it like she’s handling a toy.

“Mmmhh… so fucking big, baby. I always wanted to taste something like this. Now I’d love to definitely keep you by my side more.” She starts to lick your head, cleaning the remaining dripping pre-cum on its slit. Your breaths became heavy at her pervy actions.

“J-jeong.. ah shit, that feels so good.”

“Do you love this? Your hot girlfriend sucking off your long, thick cock?” She starts to gently pump onto your meat.

“Yeahhh… ahmm” You nodded as you swipe some hair blocking her eyes.

“I’m going to empty your balls, baby.” Jeongyeon then began to take you inside her mouth, her mouth slurping around your girth.

You are floating into Cloud 9 until her loud gag snapped you back into reality, and as you looked down, Jeongyeon has now almost swallowing your entire length, a mission success still for an impressive deepthroat.

“It fits both into my mouth and hands, can’t wait to feel our bodies mashed together.” She then starts to fasten her blowjob, spreading the mixture of her spit and your pre cum along the skin of your hardened cock.

Jeongyeon went under to also share her attention on your full heavy balls. She slobbered on each of your testicles, arising her anticipating to have your load get emptied for her. As she returned to give you more deep sucks and tight pumps, you felt that familiar tightening of your stomach and crotch.

“Fuck my mouth, baby. I know you’re getting close.” Jeongyeon mentioned it as soon as she felt your cock twitch inside her mouth. It urged you to hold her head as a handle and start moving your hips upwards as you fuck her face, her throat getting penetrated by your girth.

As she furiously tapped your thighs, you stopped moving and let your cock slip out of her mouth to give her a break, breathing deeply and tears forming in her eyes. However, she was still enjoying it. She even slapped your meat on her face, making herself look really needy.

She returned your cock back to her mouth, giving you a few more suckers before you alerted her that you were about to reach your end. “I’m cumming, Jeong! ”

Jeongyeon felt her mouth then filled with thick and creamy white substance or simply, your cum saved up for months of not ejaculating. As you take your cock out, Jeongyeon had some few cum dripping out from the side of her lips before she licked it off with her fingers after she swallowed your cum empty in her mouth.

“Damn, Jeongyeon you are so daring, aren’t you?”

“Only for you, YN. I just can’t resist how hot my boyfriend is.” She said and licked your still hard cock clean.

“Same thoughts we’re sharing, then.” You kissed her on the cheek before pulling her closer towards you and switch position, now she’s the one laying on the bed.

“My turn, baby.” You removed her panties down from her legs before you spreaded it, taking your first look at her glistening pussy ready to be taken and had its virginity invaded with the cock owned by man it adores.

You buried your face deep through her slit, tracing it with the tip of your tongue. Jeongyeon sighed loudly at the pleasure it provides. You flicked her clit repeatedly, tensing her lower parts more.

“Mmhhmmm… f-fuck, baby yeah that’s it, make that talented mouth of yours show how can it to me~” Jeongyeon bit her lips and gasped at the feeling of your sweet suckle on the fat borders of her pussy. Your tongue then went back to work inside her walls, wiggling it and bumping it on each sides.

“Oh god i’m cumming, haaahh I’m cumming on that handsome face YN!”

Jeongyeon lived up to her words, squirting her love juices straight at your face, while you try to catch some of the fluids to drink by your mouth. Sweet and tangy for your impression, it still paid off to witness your girlfriend now lost in the sensation of sex, riding her orgasm off with eyes shut off.

You kneeled between her legs and dragged the tip of your cock again to her slit. “Are you ready babe?”

Jeongyeon nodded whilst feeling a bit nervous. “P-please, YN be gentle…”

“I will, baby. Just say if you need to adjust okay? I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

“Yeah, but don’t get me wrong YN. I really love to do this with you. I want this to finally happen.”

“Me too, Jeong. Now we all have the time in the world to fulfill our desires.” You said before giving her one last nod as you start pushing your length slowly inside her pussy. Jeongyeon shuts her eyes off and groans a bit at the pain.

“Babe, you okay?” You asked her with worry.

“Yeah, just give me a bit of time to adjust.” You nodded and waited for her signal to proceed. She did, and you started to move once again. Her groans and yelps trying to take your size more transformed into moans and whimpers of pleasure as you performed your fifth and more gentle thrusts at her.

“Goddamn, Jeongyeon you’re so tight!” You grunted and gritted your teeth at how perfectly it strokes your cock as it compressed your girth.

“And you’re so fucking big inside of me, baby. You’re almost touching my womb, I can feel it poking me!” She said as she spreaded her legs even wider.

You held her ankles as you tried to speed up your jams, sending Jeongyeon delighted at your attempted aggressiveness while in a missionary position. Letting her legs wrap around your body, your hands are then planted on her bouncing tits.

“Ugh ugh ugh aghmm… yeahhh hnnghh~” Jeongyeon lets out melodies of delight out of her mouth at the heavenly pleasure of your cock banging her tight pussy.

Your strokes went slow as you tried to tease her next, making her whimpers louder. As you felt that curling feeling again, you laid your body on top of Jeongyeon and kissed her once again, your tongues dancing along to the rhythm of your movements.

You were now fucking her at such a rough pace, your balls slapping the bottom of her ass, sending her rocking crazily on the bed. Her breasts are now squished within your pecs.

“O-ohhh fuck yes there! You’re hitting the spot oh so deep, baby…”

“Jeongyeon, shit… I’m about to release it!”

“Do it outside! I can’t get pregnant yet!”

You take out your cock. As an alternative way to make your cock feel like its still ravaging her pussy, you lift up her legs and pressed them together. Inserting your cock between her juicy thighs, you continued your pace and your length sliding through the surface of her cunt made Jeongyeon feel the satisfying effect of it too.

“Shit, I’m cumming again Jeong!”

“Give it to me!”

On one last push, you blow your second load, splattering around her torso, mostly at her breasts, lips, and stomach. You gave off a few strokes in her thighs before you let go, laying down beside her on the bed.

Jeongyeon scooped your cum on her body as much as she could catch and swallowed it once again with pure will. She hummed in delight at its delicious salty taste. You and she stared at each other, exchanging both amazed and hilarious chuckles.

“I can’t believe we just did that.”

“Yeah, me too. You were really serious about getting this moment happen.” Jeongyeon laughed at your joke.

“Thank you for being my first time, YN.”

“I’m much grateful as you are, Jeong. To have it with such an amazing woman like you, especially, the only one that my heart prefers.”

You kissed her again before Jeongyeon starts to sit up. “I have to clean myself. You really did made a mess out of me, huh.” She teased you as she points at your cum dripping on her tits.

“That’s what you to do me for being so hot.”

Jeongyeon rolled her eyes and playfully pushed you to the side. She offers her hand at you. “Come on, join me to the bathroom and get clean up.”

Well for that initiative, you have no intention to decline, especially when its an another opportunity to appreciate your bodies further. Stepping into the shower, you and Jeongyeon shared some more affectionate touches under the running water flowing down to your bodies, the lust and love you have devoted to your lives have became uncontrollable to resist.

During the bath, you and Jeongyeon helped yourselves clean up, rubbing your bodies with some sneaky squeezes at the intimate parts until it became sexual again.

You cupped and massaged Jeongyeon’s breasts from behind with soapy hands while Jeongyeon knelt on your knees and gave you another round of blowjob before ending the shower and getting dressed back up. You and Jeongyeon then slept together on the bed to end your special day.

That was the last time you saw Jeongyeon at her full and sincere energy. Another week has passed since you suddenly noticed that something was wrong with Jeongyeon after you observed that she often complains about her neck and back aching a lot, even at some minimal movements.

Being a concerned boyfriend, you tried to investigate her workplace through her co-members, and you learned from them that they also noticed Jeongyeon enduring that pain. What’s surprising was that it was already happening since their preparation for More and More, and it just got more serious now that they were preparing for their next comeback.

Later that night, while she was using her phone, you decided to break the silence by confronting her about it. “Jeong. Can I ask you something? ”

“What is it?” She sounded dull.

“Is your neck giving you a hard time?”

Jeongyeon’s fingers stopped from scrolling through her phone as she got surprised at your question regarding her condition.

“H-how can you say so?”

“Jeong, I’m not blind, and I mean it when I often tell you day by day that I care for you.” You answered. “How would you think I wouldn’t noticed about it? I look at you, checking up on you time to time and then I often caught you wincing like you’re in pain. It bothered me and I decided to ask from your members if-”

Your words were cut off when you heard Jeongyeon sob. You rushed beside her and hold her hands. “Jeongyeon, why?”

“I-It hurts, YN…” she said between her sniffs, placing her face on your shoulder. It broke your heart to hear her poor voice clearly in pain.

“Why were you not telling us about it? The girls even said you were holding it in since your preparations for More and More. Was that true?”

“Y-yes…”

“Good grief, that long?” You were astounded at her revelation. “Why did you keep it as a secret? You could’ve told us about it.”

“Because I don’t want to miss the promotions, okay! ”Jeongyeon’s voice rose, making you flinch. “I don’t want to disappoint the fans, and I didn’t want to stop because I don’t want to put all my efforts and hard work I poured into this all to waste.” Her cries begin to get louder.

You remained silent as you let her express the thoughts disturbing her. “These days, I feel like I haven’t been receiving much recognition for what I’ve been doing just to entertain ONCEs, to the point that I don’t even know if some are just too hard to please or if there’s really something wrong with me. But to include that possibility, then that means I have to do something about it in case it’s like that too.

So I practiced hard and cooperated with the staff and my members to the best I could, because I want to avoid myself getting seen as someone who's just not enough for the group.” You helped Jeongyeon wipe her tears off her eyes. “And now, it frustrates me that my stupid neck won’t want to get along with what I am trying to achieve, but I’m trying not to let it get in my way, even if it’s hurting me really bad every day.”

You sighed and rubbed Jeongyeon’s shoulder to comfort the weeping woman. “Jeong, if that’s what your perception is about what the other fans hold their opinion about you, then they are not real fans as what they claim themselves to be. You can’t force yourself to be the best because you’re already at your best at what you do. And do you know one of the indications why I am saying that? And that is because you have us who love and support you, along with those real fans that you entertain with your charms and talent.

So don’t get brought on with their negative comments or impressions about you, because it doesn’t matter as long as you are not stepping on other person’s reputation. You are doing a great job, Jeongyeon. Please, don’t stress yourself now okay?”

Jeongyeon continued to cry again after hearing your words. You resumed your comfort before voicing out your request.

“We have to get you look by the doctors tomorrow, okay?”

Sadly, it was found out from the results of the x-ray that Jeongyeon is suffering from a herniated disc on the back of her neck. The company then learned about it and advised Jeongyeon to stop attending practices for now, as one of the priorities of JYP Entertainment is their idol’s health.

They were unsure at first if Jeongyeon would make it until the promotions for ICSM, but unfortunately, it was confirmed that Jeongyeon wouldn't be able to participate when they went for a check-up again with the psychologists on Jeongyeon, and this time, it showed that she is much more likely suffering from an anxiety disorder due to the effect of her herniated disc.

Since her hiatus requires her to stay at home for now to began her recovery, you then saw how Jeongyeon was badly dealing about it as she became even more down everyday not being able to join the girls on the promotions.

As usual, you have to do your role as a boyfriend by promising that you'll be there on her side always to help and console Jeongyeon.

And you were exerting everything to provide what Jeongyeon urgently needs right now. Thankfully, she is easy to instruct because she listens responsibly, like when it comes to taking her medications on time and trying to find some ways to distract herself while resting through some of her favorite hobbies at home: playing Legos with her dogs, cooking, and others.

However, occasionally the one thing she can’t avoid is her guilt and worry about her group being incomplete, and the fans missing her are killing her inside. She still holds herself responsible for the unfortunate circumstances that her group has to overcome because of her situation.

It was evident from you that there’s something that disturbs her inside. Her mood swiftly changes when she feels like the flow of the good mood you have been sharing with her has run out. It became one of your challenges for her that you must keep the ball rolling whenever you’re spending time with Jeongyeon.

Just like what she does for you, she was also following the doctor's advice that she must not tire herself too much from other heavy activities, restricting her more from going outdoors and performing some of her heavy interests like doing workouts, mountain climbing, etc.

The unavailability of those had made Jeongyeon change plans during the course of her break; thus, she decided to find a solution to relieve her stress through some freak cleaning and frequent eating to satisfy and recharge her energy.

With the combination of medications and the amount of food she daily intakes, you can observe the difference that her anxiety and injury have brought to your girlfriend. Jeongyeon began to gain weight while her mood remained unbothered.

On the first week of January, Jeongyeon's mental health slightly improved thanks to your proposal to celebrate Christmas and New Year with you and her family.

She then made a request and the company tested if she is able to go back now on stage by granting her to participate in promoting with the members, and since they have an upcoming schedule to perform their recent comeback in an award show that will have no crowd in attendance due to pandemic protocols, that opened an opportunity for Jeongyeon to join her members at least once.

Hugely accepting the offer, the members were emotionally happy for Jeongyeon, brought by longing and their support for the recovering woman.

“Unnie, I missed seeing you around!” Chaeyoung said as she ran through Jeongyeon and hugged her quick.

“You look like you’re getting better, unnie. How are you doing these days?” Dahyun asked her.

“Doing well. Thanks to YN.” Jeongyeon smiled shyly.

“Ahh, you’re so lucky that you have such a caring boyfriend like oppa.” Sana said as she pouted while letting out cute noises.

Jeongyeon then noticed that Tzuyu was just smiling at watching her co-members reconciling with her. She probably guessed that Tzuyu is embarassed to check up on her personally while being surrounded with her unnies, as she knew her unnies usually teases their savage maknae to be such a cute softie baby instead.

“Tzuyu-yah.” Jeongyeon called her, snapping her senses back as she startled.

“Won’t you say hi to unnie? I’m sad, my Tzutzu doesn’t want to have me-”

Tzuyu’s eyes largened and her expression changed into fear. “Ehh!” She shook her head and dashed at Jeongyeon, not giving a damn anymore to her playful unnies but in her surprise, the girls just clapped and awwed at them. Tzuyu got slightly shy that her thoughts were wrong and the girls were waiting for her instead to make a move.

“Sorry, unnie. I just don’t know what to say, but it’s really great to see you again with us.” Tzuyu said. Jeongyeon understood her immediately. She knows that Tzuyu wasn’t that vocal on advices and sharing sympathy when in comes on consoling someone. She rather speaks louder using her affectionate actions.

“I missed you too, Tzuyu.” And the youngest member delighted at her words.

“We really didn’t expect that you’re gonna do this, Jeong.” Nayeon said, referring to the offer. “We’ve heard that you’re keeping progress on your health and we’re not forcing you to do this, okay?”

“I know, but I had this urge in me that I wanted to give it a try. I don’t know what it is, but I couldn’t stand seeing us incomplete and not the same OT9 that the fans adore much. I don’t want them to experience again what happened when Mina took a break before.” Jeongyeon said and looked at Mina who weakly smiled and nodded understandably at her.

“So don’t mind me with this, what matters is that we can give the fans what they want before we release another album again.” Jeongyeon motivated her members.

“You’re so brave, unnie. Thank you for doing the same thing what I always wanted for ONCEs.” Mina said to Jeongyeon, remembering the time she wanted to make a surprise appearance to see ONCEs in personal while being on a hiatus also during Feel special era.

“I guess it makes us the same too, huh.” Jeongyeon smirked and Mina grinned while nodding.

“Alright, we’ll be there for you, unnie. As a leader, I must do my responsibility to guide my members for safety, and if you have any instances that you feel nervous, just hold my hand during the show okay? I’ll stand by your side like I’ll always do.” Jihyo stared at Jeongyeon who started to blink her eyes rapidly and bend her head away.

“Agh Park Jihyo even you? Why are you guys being like this, I don’t want to cry!” Jeongyeon whined. The girls laughed and they locked their beloved sister in a group hug. Meanwhile, you just returned from claiming your orders at the delivery guy waiting on the outside of the building.

You stopped at the door of the dance practice room and smiled as you watch the wholesome sight of the group, not wanting to interrupt their moment.

The event has occured, and Jeongyeon’s surprise appearance definitely shocked the fandom to the core. Her return became even better when they also won an award too. While she is watching their performance, her curiousity led her to peek at the comments and they were all positive coming from the heartfelt fans.

Although, the ocean of positivity has met its shore when Jeongyeon landed next to the Naver site, she saw some articles about her return that wasn’t actually favorable from some netizens.

They have noticed that Jeongyeon's endurance and stamina decreased compared for before, reasoning it out due to her sudden change of figure, making Jeongyeon hurt and offended by some rude comments about them.

She shut her device right away and revisit what happened to her during the event. She knows also to herself that she’s not 100% but she gave her best because what’s important to her is to entertain the fans again like she loves to do.

She tried to forget it and acted like nothing happened when you returned to the living room to spend the night away resting with her.

She then accepted to return back from hiatus by joining her members promote Alcohol-Free. It only lasted short though when it was spotted that there are claims that she’s hurting herself from the way how she’s exhausting heavily while performing, giving the netizens a mixed reaction again based from her condition.

Her secret didn’t last long also when you caught her viewing the sites related to what happened earlier. You snatched the tablet and turned it off to spare Jeongyeon from what she have seen.

“This is why I told you to stay away from engaging in social media apps too long, Jeong.” You said to her. “It won’t do no good to yourself.”

“I didn’t even meant to see them, but I knew already that I’ll be receiving complains like I used to.” Jeongyeon said while she’s laying sideways, away from you.

“Jeong, just don’t get brought up by their useless pathetic comments. They just can’t appreciate people’s hardwork, that’s why.”

“That’s it. You said it yourself. How can they appreciate what I’m doing if maybe… my hardwork wasn’t enough yet.” Jeongyeon said before you noticed that she slept after while you are advicing her not to think like that.

You sighed and joined her to the bed, cuddling her into comfort.

She wasn’t lying when she said those words to you last time. It drove her to grind for improving herself on practicing their Japanese track Perfect World to prove herself, only to cost her getting affected too much by the comments she saw that not only lifted up her motivation to excel but caused her emotional state to be depressed, halting the progress rather.

Her condition got worse, with the doctors and the company putting her back for a short hiatus again, which caused her to miss the dance practices for The Feels. It was like something inside had snapped. Her behavior and mood also changed drastically for you; your kind words of assistance weren't working enough anymore to convince her that she’s going to be okay again.

Through the first two weeks of her hiatus, you can see from Jeongyeon that she’s acting differently whenever you try to interact with her. While yours were gentle and kind, hers was rather the contrast of how you treat her.

She would just answer you with a blank face, minimal words, and a and a robotic and bland tone that would lose your enthusiasm to talk with her.

Sometimes you would just catch her staring into the unknown, and as much as you wanted to come up to her, you knew she'd silently request that you leave her alone.

This is not the Yoo Jeongyeon you knew and loved. It’s not right anymore, you thought to yourself. You know you have to do something to end this because this ain’t something she is incapable to do, both for her personal well-being and for the people around her who're impacted by it.

This urge has pushed you to confront Jeongyeon regarding her unusual antics, unintentionally leading both into an altercation.

Not because of what you said, but from what you have just heard from her when surprisingly, she was the one who initiated to break the silence during your dinner with her.

“By the way, I’m packing my things tomorrow, YN.” Jeongyeon said, taking one of her last scoops on her food.

“Packing your t-things?” You stopped moving your spoon through the plate. “Why, where you going?”

“Back to my parent’s house.” She blandly replied.

“Oh. We better sleep right after this then. Let me escort you tom-”

“Not needed.” She simply rejected. Your brows started to meet.

“Jeong, you know it’s not safe for you to go outside on your own. You’re still not well, the fans and media can just-”

“It’s not your problem anymore.” Jeongyeon’s hands gripped tightly on the table. Your stare went deeper at your girlfriend.

“Not my concern? Jeong, I’m your boyfriend.” You huffed. “Come on, what exactly is wrong with you? W-why these days… I feel like you’re trying hard to… push me away. Was there a problem? Don’t you need my assistance anymore?” You made a direct approach. It has became impatient and insufferable already for you to hold these thoughts that’s bothering you everyday.

“Or was it still the same?” You sighed heavily and scratched your forehead.

“It’s not.” Jeongyeon muttered. You were barely able to catch what she said.

“Say again?”

To your astonishment, Jeongyeon looked up and gave you the same intense stare, but her aura was different from yours. Gazing into her eyes, you had the impression that you were witnessing her most vulnerable state of being tonight as she attempted to disfigure herself with this act of hostility and coldness.

“I want to break up with you.”

Your body froze, looking at her in fright, heart and mind rambling and constricting at the same time just absorbing that sentence you thought you will never going to hear from her forever.

“W-what…?”

“We’re d-done.” She said to you and twitched her head away to avoid staring at you. “You don’t have to look up for me, I’m giving you freedom now to do whatever you want to do.”

She stands up and was about to enter her bedroom when you stood up and hit the table hard. “You can’t be serious, Jeong! Just like that?”

Jeongyeon stopped on her steps, her back facing you. “After everything I’ve done? Jeong, I’m not stupid. This isn’t the best of you, we both damn know you never want to say that.”

“I mean it, YN! Was I not obvious enough why I don’t need you now? What else you want me for you to understand!” She yelled as she turned around to look at you. You just stood there and stared at her bursting out her frustation at you.

For the first time, your eyes dwelled with tears made by the anguish in your chest after receiving those words of despise coming from someone you love the most out of anyone that you never know would express herself that she will end up hating you.

“Jeong…” You called her breathily. She was dumbstrucked seeing you emotional because of what she did. “W-what happened to us?”

She remained silent observing your stability shatter into pieces. “I’m not gonna be fooled by your acts, Jeong. You’re just saying that because you’re tired… but you don’t meant with all your heart because I know right there, I’m the one you will always love to be with.”

You slowly walked across her and Jeongyeon lowered her head to avoid gazing at your broken state closer. “You can’t just leave me with “why?”. How about me, huh? I do get tired, trying to fix you, but did you hear me wanting to break up with you?”

You raised your chin and made her look at you. “No. I didn’t stopped, I NEVER stopped, because I can’t abandon you. I can’t bear seeing you helpless because of the same thing. I love you, Jeongyeon and that… is what I mean a lot.

Don’t let me go, please. That’s all I’m asking for.” You cried as you held her hands and hold it tight. “Just tell me what’s the problem, and I’ll carry it too. We have to solve this together, I can’t let it cost you. You’re the only one I have left.”

Jeongyeon couldn’t control her own tears as she got defeated easily by your pleads of sorrow, demonstrating your unwavering and loyalty of your unbreakable love for her.

She felt pity immediately thinking about you losing her, and knowing that she has became very important aspect of your life, it’s cruel for her to apply a worse circumstance on other people than her own suffering.

Jeongyeon raised your hands together and gave yours a deep kiss. She laid her head on your chest and sobbed heavily in your arms. “I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to hurt you too.”

You hugged her closer to you and keep yourselves soothed in your warmth creating by this burning affection you share for one another. “It’s fine. I know everything must be so hard for you, but please don’t ever consider removing me or others who are willing to stay by your side and guide you to recovery.”

“It’s not that I don’t want others who care for me, it’s just that… I’m just scared, that I might just hurt and displease you because of how I’ve changed.” Jeongyeon began to explain while you wipe your tears in her face.

“That made me began to hate myself these days. I feel like I’ve losing my worth into people lives and rather becoming a burden. And I’ve tried to distance myself from you because I thought… I might just making you suffer too much to take care of me, and i feel like I’m unattractive to be paired with you. You deserve better, so I made a plan to slowly make you quit.”

She said before she broke down again brought by guilt and regret. You continued to ease her emotions off, patting her head and caressing her back.

“Jeongyeon… everything that you said, that’s not happening at all.” You gave a feedback. “You may have confessed that people might probably dislike you for how you look now compared from the previous that they’ve grown accustomed to recognize you… but I’m not.

Jeongyeon, you don’t know the level of fear I’ve got when I heard you breaking up with me. Let’s say, one of those is because you think you’re not pretty as before in my eyes anymore that concerned you. But no…”

You traced her visuals with your fingertips, Jeongyeon felt chills as she stared at your eyes encapsulating primal desire as she felt her face being admired by the man she adore.

“How about I do something… to prove I’m not letting go easy, and to make you know how you will always be the epitome of my ideal woman in my eyes.”

You catched the back of her head and pushed her into yours, colliding your lips together. You walked and guided her through the bedroom, shutting the door with your feet before you continued engaging into a wild kiss with Jeongyeon.

You removed your T-shirt and pants, sparing your boxers as the only piece of garment left worn. Jeongyeon sought that as a signal to get rid of her own clothing too, but you hold her hands to prevent her from doing.

“Don’t. All you have to do is watch and submit. Because tonight… is all about you, my love.” You kissed her again before rotating the blushing Jeongyeon, facing her through your full body mirror.

“Look at you, such a masterpiece.” You whispered in her ear as Jeongyeon watched you stroking her hair from behind. Your hands went lower, sliding it across the sides of her figure. “Shall I start doing a breakdown of what I observe that makes you understand… how special you are?”

Jeongyeon just nodded, very flushed at your sudden change of demeanor. You may have caught her response, but that wasn’t enough for her. “Cmon, baby. Don’t be shy, use that pretty voice of yours. Make me hear it.”

You whispered to her ear while you wrapped her waists and pushed her closer to you. Jeongyeon whimpered as she felt her ass bump into your boner. “Yes p-please… let me know.”

“Good. Let’s start with your face, babe.” You squished her plump cheeks and gave it both kisses, making Jeongyeon’s blush intensely. “Back from the time I’ve saw you in my clinic, the first thing my mind commented was how exceptionally beautiful you are, Jeongyeon.”

“Sure, there may be other women around there who are also beautiful but… yours is just… unique. And I don’t lie when you’re the one I still wanted even after all this time, because my heart only prefers the beauty you possess.”

Jeongyeon smiled at your endearing compliment. You kissed her on the temple before moving on. Your sight was on her neck, massaging and sniffing on her scent. “These smooth, milky neck and shoulders that you always expose from me. That’s why I love laying my head or burying my face onto your skin, makes it better whenever I miss having your touch on me.”

You peeked to see Jeongyeon shutting her eyes and savoring your touch. “Don’t close your eyes too long, baby. I want you to see everything.” She complied, and then she realized that you’re starting to lift her shirt up, holding the hem.

You smirked as you teasingly slowed down your hands beginning to cover her cups before you planted them suddenly, yelping Jeongyeon. You kneaded her boobs gently through the bra. “So soft. Whenever I catch you changing up and get to see you in your favorite set of lingeries, not gonna lie, it makes you so hot, Jeongyeon… especially today.”

“These nice tits, so flawless and pearly, contrasting to the color of your enticing black bra.” Jeongyeon heard you groan while groping her boobs, turning her on.

“But ofcourse, nothing gets better when I see them uncovered, for my eyes only. .” You sensed the clip on her front and unclicked it, exposing her packed set of breasts laying neatly on top of her ribcage. “Goddamn, they’re so perfect.”

You resumed to knead them again, making sure that you give them equal attention. Jeongyeon starts to gasp and whine as your fingers twists and pull her nipples. “You say your body gets ugly, but it just became better for me Jeong. Look at your tits, they’ve became bigger… perkier… and heavier.” You said while playing at them, jiggling them in your palm.

“Makes me wonder, if I put a baby on you today and make your pregnant, wouldn’t these get even more bigger. And God… getting these huge jugs filled with milk, I’m afraid our baby won’t be getting everything of it, because daddy have to share instead, I may even couldn’t control and won’t spare a drop.” You whispered seductively as your hands circling her tits intensified, now matching it with your crotch humping the outline of her ass.

“Please… fuck YN I’m about to lose it, hurry…” Jeongyeon said as she felt her panties getting soaked now by her juices.

You understood what she meant, your hand went to her bottom. “Oh goodness, you’re really soaked down there. Couldn’t wait to fuck you, huh?”

“Y-yes…”

“But hold it a bit longer, we’re not through yet, baby.” You chuckled devilishly. Jeongyeon whined as you left her crotch and slowly kneeled beside her, your hands went attention now to her tummy that gained some fat due to the effects of her medication.

“You call this ugly but I take it to be cute, instead. I can’t wait to lay my head on these fluffy tummy of yours whenever I’m bored, baby.” You said as you pinched her belly and wiggled it. “Those bodyshamers who will dare to berate you will definitely feel my wrath, Jeong. Nobody can insult you.”

Your fingertips then reached the waistband of her jogging pants. “Ah yes, we’re getting closer to the main event.” Jeongyeon continues to watch you work on her lower part, pulling down her pants. She stepped out from it and there she is, all left with nothing but her matching white panties.

“There’s another thing why I love your body even more, Jeong… is through these.” You ran your hands, inspecting her long legs and giving her thighs some squeeze, eliciting an ‘ahh’ from Jeongyeon. “You have gotten way even thicker this time, Jeongyeon. I think I’ll get addicted burying my face and willingly die onto these meaty, juicy thighs compressing my head.”

“T-that’s harsh. I-I still want to keep you.”

“Course you do, nobody can appreciate you better than I do.” Jeongyeon looked at you and blushed.

She watched you again at the mirror, caressing the length of her legs before you playfully bumped your finger at her core, letting out a lewd sound from her. “Y-YN!”

“And lastly, this.” You repeated it again, making Jeongyeon close her legs for a while before you removed her panties, and Jeongyeon is now fully naked in front of the mirror.

You kneeled again, rubbing your face on her ass and burying it between her crack, sniffing on it. “Y-YN… it’s d-dirty down there!”

“I don’t care, but you still smell so intoxicating, Jeong.” You gave a kiss on each of her cheeks before spanking her.

“Ahh!”

“Do you love me smacking these fruity butt you got, Jeongyeon?”

“Y-yes…”

You slapped it again. “God you’re so perfect. Sculptured and blessed by the gods with a perfect combination of huge tits and firm ass. Thank heavens for making me the luckiest guy in the world, thinking that I can have this all by myself.” You whistled. “And you think I would have the guts to find another woman when I already have mine as the best.”

Jeongyeon’s heart is blooming at your continous praises for her body and beauty, effectively boosting her confidence.

“Spread those legs, baby. Let me see that dripping cunt of yours.” She followed you, and there she showed her pussy tainted with her pre-cum.

You traced it and catched some of her fluid, sending chills again on her body as she felt her folds scratched by your fingertips. Your way of licking her juices off your hand just makes Jeongyeon’s arousal even higher.

You cupped her pussy and inserted two of your fingers inside her, pushing and pulling it to trigger her walls. She started to hold on to you to maintain balance. “Ahhh mhhmm…”

“Say, Jeongyeon. You’re just begging to be fucked now, aren’t you?”

“Y-yes…”

“Louder, say it clear.”

“PLEASE FUCK ME YN, I can’t take it anymore…”

You speed up the face of fingering her cunt. “More. Give me more.”

Jeongyeon bit her lips and gasped at the feeling of her pussy being invaded by your slender fingers. “Ah I-I’m coming…”

“You do? Release it first. Don’t be shy squirting in front of your loving boyfriend.”

With few more rams, Jeongyeon sprayed her juices on the floor and onto your hand and feet. You felt Jeongyeon heaving deeply, but you didn’t let her rest as she suddenly felt your cock grazing her wet pussy, realizing you have stepped out of your boxers already, making both of you now naked on the mirror.

“Do you want me to fill you up so bad and make you a mommy, Jeongyeon?”

“P-please, I don’t care. Just give em all to me.”

You catched her face and lean it closer to you, breaking character. “Control your hormones, babe. You can’t get pregnant yet, still have career to maintain right?” Jeongyeon got embarassed, realizing how horny you have turned her already. You chuckled. “But, I get you. Promise, I’ll give it to you in the future, I’ll give you as much cum as you want in any of your holes but first, I just know where to put it for now.”

You licked her jawline and nibbled at her earlobe before raising one of her leg and point your tip at her. Jeongyeon’s eyes widened before it transformed into arousal and delight that she’s about to get fucked by your enormous cock. “You’re gonna be loved tonight, Jeongyeon. All you have to do is watch me.”

You sink her into your length and Jeongyeon lets out her first moan as you begin to plunge into her slow in a one-legged standing position.

She wrapped her arms around your head and kissed you. Your other hands went on playing her tits as you continued fucking her.

Your pace increased, now creating smacking sounds resonating around the room. Jeongyeon watched herself getting bounced feverishly in your arms. Few deep pumps and she was shocked that you released and drop her to the floor, releasing your cum into her face and her upper chest.

Jeongyeon understood what you have meant, you did have found some alternative technique to atleast not let your cum turned to waste. She scooped some of it and have a taste before you leaned forward and presented your still stiff cock on her.

Jeongyeon didn’t hesitated to put your cock inside her warm mouth, giving your shaft some cleansing with her saliva. She gave you a usual impressive blowjob, she looked at the mirror to see your satisfied expression while patting her head like a good girl, motivating her to perform better.

Jeongyeon lifts your cock and went next to your hanging full balls. She sucked gently on each testicles, nibbling on your foreskin and rolling her tongue at its roundness.

Jeongyeon didn’t hesitate to put your cock inside her warm mouth, giving your shaft some cleansing with her saliva. She gave you your usual impressive blowjob, and she looked in the mirror to see your satisfied expression while patting her head like a good girl, motivating her to perform better.

Jeongyeon lifted your cock and went next to your hanging full balls. She sucked gently on each testicle, nibbling on your foreskin and rolling her tongue at its roundness.

Entering her asshole, you fucked her slow which made Jeongyeon moan and grit her teeth at how big you are inside of her. You also joined her moans and curses because of her tight she is, but the perfect grip that she has around your girth is what effectively makes her ass stroking your cock even more pleasurable.

You started to fuck her faster, her ass id now being pounded against your crotch. Maintaining your hold on her waist, you took a short time to let go one of your hand to give some few smacks on her asscheeks again.

“Do you like me fucking your precious peachy ass, baby?”

“Yes, fuck! You’re about to tear me apart with your big cock, YN!”

“You can take it, right? You must be going crazy right now feeling my cock fill up your tight ass.” You said as you continued to hammer her.

“Ugh yes, you can do whatever you want YN. Your cock is the only one I need fucking me.”

“I bet you do, because look at how compatible our bodies together. You’re so perfect around my cock, and I’ll be using it to please you whenever you want!” “Oh yes! Harder baby, pound me!”

You fucked her faster at full speed, testing your energy and Jeongyeon’s until you reached your climax, firing more seeds inside of her ass. As you released, Jeongyeon watched you smack your creamy dick in her cheeks before she felt that ticklish burst of your cum overflowing her hole.

Reaching for some tissue, you wipe off some of your cum before you pick up Jeongyeon and make her sit on your lap. To make sure she can still get a full view of the sexual interaction that both of you are engaging in, you positioned her as a reverse-seated cowgirl. Lifting her up, you slammed her, then back down on your cock, fucking her again into a nice slow introductory pace.

Jeongyeon just lustfully and gratefully watched you perform your intimacy stored solely for her, kissing her neck, playing with her huge breasts while caressing her tummy.

She was indeed feeling loved and honoured tocherish such an awesome man like you who is returning the same exact amount of how she wants to experience what love is supposed to be.

Her smile went wider and bigger as she has continued to cooperate and join with the flow of your intercourse with her. She is simply enjoying having her time alone with you tonight, appreciating your way of servicing her to overcome and forget her personal problems even for a moment.

On your observation, you sensed Jeongyeon beginning to add some movements of her own as you continue to penetrate her underneath. She was now grinding and rolling her hips to stimulate her walls and stroke your cock in other angles.

Her moans have gotten constant and repeated, lifting your hormones to encourage pleasuring her as much as you can provide for this wonderful woman sharing a bed with you tonight.

“You seemed like you’re liking this now, Jeong. I can feel you moving now on your own.”

“Yeah… fuck mhhmm you’re right. You never fail to get me hooked on with your big cock impaling me, baby. I can feel every inch of you filling me up so good. Don’t stop… ugh hngh~”

“Oh don’t worry, I still got a lot left in me, baby.”

You leaned back and laid on the bed, letting Jeongyeon now ride you on her own. Enjoying the view of Jeongyeon bouncing erratically on your lap, all you had to do is to gasp in amazement at how your girlfriend becomes even more skilled at sex when gets hornier.

“Fuck you’re so big, YN. I would love to have you invade me everyday.” Jeongyeon continues to praise how great your cock makes her feel. She twerked and rolled her hips more, eager to receive your load for her.

“Jeongyeon, I’m about to cum!”

She gets off from your lap and formed like a ball between your legs, she pumped your cock a few times before your seed aimed at her mouth and tongue, taking a taste of your addicting creamy load once again.

As she let go of your cock, she laid beside you to take a minute of rest. You still have enough stamina left. You repositioned Jeongyeon so that she could still be visible in the mirror. You turned her aside and slid underneath her body.

Now in a 69 position, you have an excellent view of her streaming wet pussy and her freshly fucked asshole gaping with your newly unloaded batch.

You gave each peck on the flesh of her vagina’s exterior before flicking and poking her clitoral area to stimulate her on the edge. The more you kept on teasing her, Jeongyeon was matching your game with her hums around your cock and repeated hollow sucks on your mushroom head.

Kneading her thighs and spanking her plump ass one more time, you lifted Jeongyeon a bit to signal her that you'd be moving again. She lay prone on her side, and you went behind her to insert your cock back in her pussy this time.

Fucking her again in a spooning form, Jeongyeon combs your head as she whimpers and refreshingly sighed at your mouth sucking her tits while you press her legs and fuck her pussy from behind. Your other hand was directing her boobs on your face to add more stimulation on her intimate part.

You paused to fuck her pussy when you come up of an idea that interests you. Jeongyeon suddenly felt the warmth of your shaft between her thighs, and just as she discovered, you have now ejaculating yourself between them.

You grabbed her hand and placed it in front of your tip. Moving your hips as your stomach begins to curl up for a familiar climax, you released your sperm with most of it landing onto her palm.

Jeongyeon made a show by staring at you as she licked your sperm through her hand, turning you on at her sexy and sensual gesture. Her mischievous smirk inspired you to get up from your knees and straddle her torso.

Squeezing and fondling her huge tits for a short foreplay, you grabbed your cock and sandwiched it to her succulent bosoms. Performing a titfuck while she’s under you, Jeongyeon tries to catch your head with her tongue to please you further. Thankfully, with your massive length and width, she was able to grab a taste of your irresistible meat.

Now giving a rough pounding on her abused tits, you didn’t give a damn anymore if you’re getting aggressive. You ain’t stupid to catch her needy look looking up at you, challenging you to give everything you have because she’ll fall for it more.

Couple more strokes and you mounted her face by pushing your cock deep in her, depositing your load that flooded her inside.

Jeongyeon swallowed again, ensuring that none would be left wasted as a way of replacement for not being able to have her pussy filled yet with your baby batter that would make her womb fertilized.

As you let Jeongyeon rest again for a while, you went your attention on her hypnotizing tits, sucking and gnawing at them like there’s no tomorrow. Having a glimpse of hee now watching you do your own thing, you sensed that she must be now back on track.

“Can you still keep up, baby? We can stop now if everything’s enough for you.” You said as you gently knead her breast.

“How about you?”

“Well I can still do more. You’re just so attractive tonight, Jeongyeon. How would I say this? Hmmm… oh yeah, I can’t stop me.” You winked at her before Jeongyeon wheezed and laughed.

“Witty.” She rolled her eyes at you and chuckled.

“That makes us even.”

“You’re so good tonight, you know. You make me wanna say more and more, because I’ve been craving to have this again with you.” She said as she patted your face.

“Wait, is that another reference again?” You squinted your eyes at the guilty and sheepish Jeongyeon acting like she didn’t got caught. You pinched her nose. “Ahhh!”

“You dork.”

“It hurts!” She pouted and touched her nose. “Just continue eating my tits, you pervert.”

You wheezed and shook your head as you played again with her breasts until you remembered something. “But seriously, I’m happy that I can make you laugh again.” Your eyes went tender for Jeongyeon as she just watched you become serious.

“This is what I just want to see from you. Being here as my girlfriend while I’m convinced that you’re doing fine. Your smile is one of the things that calms me down and keeps me going through the reality of life. You can’t blame me why its such a big deal for me to lose it, how more if I… lose you completely.” Your tears escaped again from your eyes and Jeongyeon wipes it off.

“I’m really sorry, YN. I became selfish not thinking that you’re struggling as me too. And to involve others with my worries and fears only to get their feelings hurt… especially you. I don’t think I should have a nerve to pity myself for what I’ve done.” Jeongyeon apologized.

You reached for her hand and lock it in your grasp. Laying beside her, you cuddled her and laid her head on your chest where your heart only beats for her. “I don’t care how many times I would be going to make this known for you, I still and will love you in just the way you are, Yoo Jeongyeon.

Your body figure doesn’t matter to me too much because the reason why I love you is because of how kind-hearted you are and I feel like I own you too much since the beginning.” You said to her.

Jeongyeon remembered that she was there for him in ups and down, to provide him that would require saving like for example: his pet clinic before. And now she also realises that you were doing the same for her. You also became the special person who will do anything to stay by her same most of the time, bringing her back to when they first met.

You didn't treated her as Jeongyeon from TWICE but simply as by herself, as a normal human and Korean citizen named Yoo Jeongyeon, like she always wanted to receive from anybody whether they may be part of the fandom or not.

“How fitted a woman’s body wasn’t my qualification to make you my girlfriend. Even if I marry you in the future, it’s not because I’m in love only because of the way you look, but because you fulfilled my dream and I devoted myself to give your soul and existence a meaning to my world.”

Jeongyeon kissed you directly through the lips and hugged you tightly. “I love you so much, YN.” That’s what all it took to show her utmost respect and value for your role.

As you and her go on for another heated kiss, you felt your cock being woken back up by her thighs poking your shaft.

Bumping into her folds, you spreaded it wide again as you inserted it back inside of her, fucking her passionately before you and her both go on into another multiple number of positions, basically them having sex around the house, shooting a gallon more of cum in her mouth and ass until you and her are too spent. You and her then slept together at dawn, with your dry flaccid cock still tucked into her snatch.

Because of that moment you shared with her, Jeongyeon slowly starts to recover from her anxiety, trying to be confident and love herself for her new figure and become not much bothered by the hate comments.

She then goes to hang out more often with her family, members and her boyfriend. It made her successfully return and fully participate for the upcoming comebacks like Talk That Talk, Set Me Free and One Spark while also attending endorsements and doing modeling again to spread body positivity and break Korean beauty standards.

And in April 2024, the media, the K-Pop community, and especially the fanbase of ONCEs across the world were surprised to learn about the announcement that Yoo Jeongyeon made.

You and her officially tied the knot at a chapel in Ulsan, and many acquaintances, friends, and relatives from each other attended to witness the grand wedding. The couple were very honored and grateful for their attendance. The event became the headline of numerous news stories and articles.

Both excused themselves and rented a hotel room to celebrate their marriage in private during the honeymoon trip. There, they fucked each other's brains for hours, granting your sworn words that you’ll be making her a mommy in the future by finally pouring everything you have in store through her fertile womb, which ultimately led to Jeongyeon giving birth and welcoming your first child into the family.

Now that Jeongyeon has accomplished all the dreams that she has shared with you to come true, the idol is proud and fully assured that their love is truly unconditional and that she claims you as the perfect man for her who will always accept, believe, and stand by her no matter what happens that might attempt to bring her down.

THE END

#twice #twice jeongyeon #jeongyeon #yoo jeongyeon #twice jeongyeon x male reader #jeongyeon x male reader #jeongyeon x m reader #twice x m reader #twice oneshots #twice au #twice fanfic #commission #commission fic #kpop oneshots #kpop au #kpop fanfic

66 notes · View notes

dazed-and-confused23 · 14 hours

Text

Dear Hearts and Gentle People 13

Summary: You are kidnapped in the middle of the night while the two of you are camped out a little too close to fiend territory. Cooper finds you and makes them pay the price for taking you in the first place.

Pairings: The Ghoul | Cooper Howard x Female Reader

Warnings: Angst and Violence. Dark themes. Cooper is not a happy camper. Forced drug use and sexual assault but no rape. Blood and death.

Masterlist

It's been a week since the fiend leader Motor Runner and his crew of misfits had captured you. It'd been in the middle of the night, Cooper asleep and you on second watch. Your mind was already drowsy, and you hadn't been paying the best attention to your surroundings when you'd wondered off to take a pee that night. Four of them had jumped you, stuffing a dirty sock in your mouth and spraying some type of chem in your face that made you pass out within seconds.

Since then, they've kept you hopped up on a concoction of drugs. It was mostly a mix of jet and med-x, drugs that made you feel calm and foggy brained. Motor Runner had learned quickly that he couldn't touch you unless you'd been double dosed and restrained, wrists lashed behind you as you kneeled by his throne made of human skeletons They'd taken your clothes early on, leaving you in nothing but the thin underclothes to protect your modesty.

Cooper had woken that morning and found you gone, but your things still left behind. Panic and anger had set in immediately, and the ghoul gathered everything up before he started to follow the tracks that led into the destroyed city that surrounded the Strip. It was slow going. The ruins were rife with all kinds of surprises, and he'd had to fall back more than once after getting overwhelmed by a gang of fiends.

However, he'd finally arrived at Vault 3, and nothing was going to stop Cooper from getting you back.

You swayed side to side, high as a kite, and so drugged up that you weren't sure which was was up and which was down. The world spun around you, making you feel sick as bile curdled in your stomach. Motor Runner was saying something, but you couldn't be bothered to pay much attention. Your hearing felt muffled, but you could feel the vibrations of some type of explosion going off further up the Vault.

"Hear that, bitch? Sounds like someone actually tried to come save you. It's soo fuckin' bad that they'll never make it down here."

A gritty hand grabbed your jaw, and cool metal was pressed to your temple, digging in hard enough that it cut into your flesh. Blood wells up and drips down your chin to mix with the other disgusting fluids and gunk that stains your front. Your jaw aches, but you know better than to fight against what the fiend leader wants from you.

Cooper tosses another grenade down the hall, a terrible grin on his lips as the fiends scream in pain, shrapnel shredding through their flesh and sending blood splattering the walls. His side arm flashes in the dim red lighting of the vault, and Cooper relished in the carnage that he leaves behind him. The fiends deserved worse than death, and he would happily be the one to deliver their silence.

They put up more and more of a fight the deeper he went inside the Vault. The ghoul ducks into an abandoned room and quickly reloads, sliding rounds into the chamber with steady hands before he ducks back out into the hallway to blow away three unlucky men that'd been charging down the hallway with pool sticks.

One of them gasps for air, but he's still alive, so Cooper stops for half a second to haul the man up, slamming him against the wall. The bounty hunter's face is stained with red, and the fiend howls in agony when Coop digs his his finger into the bullet wound on the raiders' side.

"Where the fuck is she?" He spits and shakes the man when all he can do is cry, "Answer me you son of a bitch!"

"Down! Motor Runner has the bitch!" the man eventually screams and Cooper puts him down like he would a rapid dog. On he went, dropping fiends and tossing explosives when he could. The walls were painted red by his actions, and the entire vault looked like a murder scene by the time he'd made it to the lowest level.

Tears fell from your eyes as Motor Runner used your mouth, his heavy cock sliding in and out as he takes pleasure in using you. He grunts and moans like an animal, and you have never felt so shamed and disgraced before in your life. You gag around his length, and a sick combination of precum and drool drips from the side of you mouth to mingle with the blood already there.

This is the scene that Cooper arrives to, his features pulled down into an awful snarl as he points his hand cannon at Motor Runner. He takes you in, your bare chest, and the thin panties you wear that hardly cover anything. The fear and broken, defeated look that you wear across your beautiful face.

"Ha! Nice job gettin' down here, Rotter!" The fiend leader hisses and snaps his hips, vulger curves spewing from his lips, "Just in time to watch me cum down your cunt's throat."

Cooper hears you whine and watches you clench your eyes shut. He can hardly see through the film of red that covers his vision, so raged filled that his hand shakes from how tightly he holds his side arm. Motor Runner still has a pistol pressed against your temple, smart enough to not take any chances.

"She ain't yours, Fucker," Cooper snarls right back and takes a couple of steps forward, only to stop when the raider jerked you around to kneel in front of him, on display like come kind of fucked up prize. The fiend scoffs at him.

"Doesn't look like it's your cock in your mouth right now, does it?"

Even drugged and out of it, you can still register what's going on, and hateful shame fills you up to your core. With a vault full of fiends, fighting back had felt hopeless, but seeing Cooper made rage build up and bubble over. Motor Runner had made a mistake when he pulled his attention away from you, and you took your change the second You felt the barrel against your temple go slack.

Cooper watched as Motor Runner's face went white, a silent scream falling past his lips as you bite down as hard as you can. Your teeth pierce his dick, and blood wells up in your mouth as the fiend rips away from you. You fall back, jaw aching at you hit the ground with a thud. You grunt when the back of your head hits the concrete floor, and you see stars.

The ghoul dashes forward, grabbing you the arm to haul you to his side while the fiend wallows on the floor, his hands grabbing at his dick that hangs limp between his legs. Cooper fishes out his knife and cuts the rope around your hands, and you move before he can make sure that you're okay.

You fling yourself on top of the fiend, pinning him down with your knees on his shoulders as you wrap your hands around his throat. You use every ounce of strength you have left, squeezing and watching the life fade out of the man's eyes before you roll off his cooling body, laying on your back as you cry and stare up at the ceiling.

Cooper carefully picks his way over to you, crouching by your side and gently gathering you up and in his arms. You don't fight him and only cry harder when you pick up his familiar scent when you shove your face in the crook of his neck. You shiver and shake, relief filling your body as your ghoul holds you tightly.

"I'm sorry it took me so long to get to you, babygirl," Cooper rumbles, but you shake your head. You didn't care, the ghoul had come for you, and that's all that mattered. He gathers your frame up and stands with a soft grunt.

"Let's get outta here."

#cooper howard #fallout #fallout prime #fallout tv series #cooper howard x reader #x reader #the ghoul x reader #dear hears and gentle people #angst with a happy ending #kidnapping

44 notes · View notes

svcredveins · 24 hours

Text

Fast heartbeat file time. It’s a 5 minute one! 🫀

Honestly, I’m not that proud of this one, and it sucks too because previously I recorded a fast heartbeat file and it sounded a bit better than this; there wasn’t much thudding or creaking either, which in this one, is kind of annoying. The other one unfortunately did not record because of a recording failure (somehow my phone was low on storage) so all of that nice recording went to the bin haha.

I had to turn the volume way, way up to the max for this one in my editing program because of how muffled my stemo was with bad quality. My apologies for that.

Next time, I’m going back to my phone. I love hearing my little lady’s valves pump blood through her chambers, but with the stemo, it was just so muffled that it just was thudding to the motion rather than focusing on what’s going on with my little lady. Also another issue with the stemo is it’s about a half a second behind real time. It threw me off as I get her pounding after doing squats; felt like I had two hearts beating in one body, it was kind of odd.

Anyway, my apologies for the run down on that, but on the bright side, I did to another fast heartbeat file.

Any other good recommendations? I don’t want to say that I’ve wasted my money on it, and I’m probably doing it wrong but I don’t know. No matter what I do it seems to still be muffled, actually, worse than before. To clarify, I had it on the custom filter so I feel as though that doesn’t pick up my little lady as well as the actual heart filter does, maybe that was my issue but I don’t know haha. I tried though despite the creaking and thudding being worse in this one. Ah well. I’ll try again at some point and see if I can get it less muffled and more focused on my little lady, but for now for another fast heartbeat file, I’m using my phone; my valves are even better picked up there, but yeah, I tried anyhow :)

#cardiophilia #heartbeat #cardiophile #cardiophile thoughts #stethoscope #self stething #beating heart #female cardiophile #female heartbeat #fast heartbeat

39 notes · View notes

madangel19 · 2 days

Note

Okay okay, so hear me out.

The ghoulettes (either one or all, doesn't matter which) and Phantom, right?

Phantom is sick for the first time topside and it's bad.

Bad because they try to hide it for so long they collapse. It's not their fault really, they don't really know what sickness is.

They wake up in Cirrus' room and the girls nurse them back to health!

Ooo, I like :3

Content: Fainting and some angst from poor Phantom

Words Count: 767

Phantom groaned when another wave of unease washed over him during practice. It had been happening all morning and he had no idea what was happening. Did he eat something bad? That often happened when one ate tainted meat, but the food in the ministry had been perfect so far.

He tried to focus on his guitar, but the more he played, the more pain and unease took over. He could see the concerned looks from his pack members whenever he messed up. That was to be expected since he was new, but when he saw Copia looking back at him, he felt even worse. There was plenty of time to get better with performing. These songs were new to him and he needed more practice, but he had been doing so well over the past few weeks.

“Let’s take a ten minute break,” Copia said when they were done practicing Kaisarion. He gave Phantom a knowing nod before going over to drink some water.

“Hey, are you okay?” Dewdrop asked, walking over to him with two water bottles in hand. Phantom didn’t realize just how thirsty he was when Dewdrop handed him the water bottle.

“I’m fine. I…I just need more practice,” Phantom replied, taking a sip of the water.

It suddenly hit him like a break and he coughed violently, dropping the water and spilling it. He tried to steady himself, but he was quickly on his knees, alerting the rest of the pack and Copia. His ears were ringing and his vision grew foggy as the ghouls surrounded him. He felt a hand on his back easing him to lie down and all went dark.

Phantom groaned, slowly opening his eyes to a dark room. His head was pounding and there was something cold on his forehead. He tried to move his hand to feel what was there, but his movements were sluggish. He felt high, but it was a bad kind of high.

A soft chirp filled the air and he noticed movement in front of him. More chirps and chitters surrounded him and he noticed three figures surrounding him.

“Hey there, Bug. You gave us quite a scare back there,” a familiar voice cooed as one of the figures got closer.

Phantom blinked and Cirrus took form before him. She smiled at him and placed a hand on his forehead, taking off whatever it was that he had there. It looked like a wet towel.

“What…What happened?” Phantom asked, his voice weak.

“You passed out on us, sweetie. Looks like you caught a nasty bug,” Cumulus said, appearing on his other side with another towel in hand.

“A…bug? Did…Did I get…bit?” Phantom questioned.

Cirrus and Cumulus exchanged worried glances before turning back to him. Cumulus put the rag on his forehead while also caressing his skin with perfectly cool fingertips.

“It’s not an actual bug, honey. You got sick real bad. It happens with new summons, but you’ll feel better in a few days with rest. I know it feels scary, but you have us to take care of you,” Cumulus chimed, her smile sweeter than anything.

“I…I gotta practice. The band needs…me…,” Phantom murmured. He couldn’t be laying around in bed when he should be getting better at performing. If he wasn’t good enough, then he would surely be sent back to the pits. The very thought terrified him.

“It’s okay, Phantom. We have plenty of time before the tour starts. You just rest and we’ll be here for you. Swiss will make you your favorite snacks whenever you feel like eating. How’s that sound?” Cirrus said, patting his shoulder.

“What if…What if they send me…back?” Phantom asked, feeling tears well up in his eyes.

“That’s not gonna happen, Buggy. All of us have gotten sick at some point and we were never sent back. You’re staying here with us no matter what,” Cumulus said, leaning in to peck him on the cheek.

Phantom let out a sigh and relaxed into the bed. Cirrus and Cumulus continued to chitter amongst themselves as they worked on tucking him into the bed and making him comfortable.

“You need anything, Bug?” Cirrus asked.

He wasn’t quite sure what he needed until a wave of drowsiness took over him and his eyelids grew heavy.

“Just…sleep,” he murmured.

“You rest up as much as you can, honey. That’s the best thing you can do now,” Cumulus said.

Phantom smiled up at them as he slowly closed his eyes. The last thing he heard was them humming softly together as they sat on either side of him.

#the band ghost #ghost band #nameless ghouls #nameless ghoulettes #phantom ghoul #cumulus ghoulette #cirrus ghoulette

33 notes · View notes

heliads · 1 day

Note

Can you do Peter Pan x reader OUAT? Peter goes to the modern world with Emma, Snow, David and them as they are looking for someone. He meets this girl and takes an interest to her. He’s never seen someone with facial piercings, and dyed hair before, they come to realize she is the girl they’ve been looking for.

'magic finds magic' - peter pan

masterlist

Peter Pan is leaving Neverland. Worse, he’s leaving Neverland alongside Snow, Emma, David, and Hook. In terms of traveling partners, this has got to be the lowest of the low. However, the sand in Peter’s immortal hourglass is running out, and his first attempt at prolonging his life with the heart of Henry Mills didn’t exactly go according to plan. It’s this or nothing, even though Peter is starting to wonder if it would be better to just die than put up with these people any longer.

Never in his life did Peter Pan think he’d be working with the good guys. But never in his life did Peter think he’d be dying, either. A few compromises will have to be made in the name of preserving Peter’s everlasting life, and if that means he has to put up with some princesses and pirates for a few days, so be it. In no time at all, his immortal life will be restored, and he can go back to Neverland and put all of this behind him. Hopefully.

Peter was supposed to die back on Neverland. He was running out of time, anyway. He had set up the perfect scheme: kidnap Henry, disorient the boy’s rescuers on his island long enough to win the Heart of the Truest Believer, and cut the organ out of the boy’s chest if necessary. He’d almost gotten away with it, too, except he was foiled at the last minute. Heartbreaking. So unlike him.

For some reason, though, he hadn’t been left to die in the caverns of Skull Rock. Emma and the others had needed him, for some odd reason, and although none of them trust him in the slightest, they do trust Peter’s single-minded selfishness to keep himself alive. So they claim, at least, and so they had gotten a spell to give Peter one more week of life in exchange for help. If this plan works out, Peter will have a way to continue his immortal life without needing to murder Henry. If it doesn’t, or if he betrays them, he’ll die anyway.

He can feel it now, the pang of his close call with death. There’s a pain in his chest that wasn’t there before, a certain weakness in his lungs. Peter gets tired more easily. He feels– well, he feels like Henry and Emma. He feels mortal. Like he could die at any moment.

Peter has, obviously, thought about double-crossing them, maybe even triple-crossing them, but it’s no use. He feels shakily mortal right now, and Peter does not much enjoy the possibility of his own demise. This is the closest he’s ever come to being beaten, and Peter hates the feeling. He’ll have to play along for now, but after that, he will have his revenge.

First, though, Peter has to do what the others want. They’ve been careful to reveal as few details to him as possible, but the idea is solid. There’s a magical person somewhere in the modern world, in a city far from Storybrooke. This person is like the embodiment of a true love’s kiss spell, designed to renew hope in storybook characters through small acts of power that ultimately drive two needed people together. They’re like a guardian angel of those on the brink of destruction, which is exactly what Peter needs right now.

Peter has plenty of time to mull this over. They’ve forced him into a terrible, small room with awful carpets– an apartment, Emma called it– while they talk out what to do with both him and their missing spell-person. Peter is trying to focus, but he’s getting stared at by Henry Mills again, which is absolutely ruining his mood.

“What do you want?” Peter asks, glaring at the boy.

Henry just goggles back at him. “Don’t you feel bad for trying to kill me?”

Peter snorts. “Why would I do that?”

Henry shrugs. “You pretended you were my friend. I know you like the other Lost Boys on your island, I thought you would have felt bad for killing one of them. I guess not.”

“I don’t feel bad about killing someone so I would live,” Peter says, then wonders why he’s arguing with a child. “Go preach your morals to someone who wants to listen.”

“The others are busy,” Henry pouts.

Peter eyes him unhappily. “And what, I’m your best option for polite conversation? You really are desperate, aren’t you?”

Henry rolls his eyes. “I’d say you’re desperate. You’re the one who’s still talking to me.”

Peter can’t really argue with that, so he deftly changes the topic of conversation before Henry starts looking proud of himself again. “Tell me about our target again. You said you saw them before?”

“Only in a dream,” Henry admits, “but it was a clear dream, I swear. I saw a girl who looked about your age. She seemed like any other teenager, but there was something about her that was different. The way she spoke, maybe, or the glint in her eyes. She was magical, I’m sure of it. She can save Storybrooke.”

“And save me,” Peter reminds him. “That’s the important part.”

Henry rolls his eyes again. If he keeps that up, they’re going to get stuck like that forever. “Yes, I know, you’re only interested in keeping yourself alive. So long as it helps us find this girl, though, I don’t care.”

Peter leans forward. “What’s your plan for finding this girl, then? A little scouting party? This city is big. You’ll never find her.”

Henry shakes his head. “Magic has a way of finding magic. Somehow, our paths will cross.”

“That’s a terrible strategy,” Peter grouses. Why is he entrusting his life to this boy again? He remembers something about having no other options, but it doesn’t seem as good an excuse right now.

“Ask the adults, then,” Henry tells him, and gestures towards the miniscule apartment kitchen, where Emma, Snow, Hook, and David are currently huddled around a table, talking in hushed voices about what to do.

Not wanting to mess with the kid anymore, Peter pulls himself to his feet and heads over. “Tell me you have a plan,” he says.

The adults look up at him. “Find the girl,” Hook says shortly. “That’s our plan.”

Peter scoffs. “You could search this city for months and not find her. What if she doesn’t want to be found? If this girl has any brains at all, she’ll know that people will want her magic and she’ll hide. It’s what I would do.”

Emma sighs. “We don’t even know if this girl knows that she has magic. She’s probably just living an ordinary life, and we’re about to drag her out of it with all of our trouble.”

“Don’t tell me you feel bad for her,” Peter scolds her. “You want this, don’t you? So go get it, or I will.”

Snow tries to tell him to calm down, but David, so quick to anger when it comes to Peter, surges out of his chair. “How about you do something helpful and think with us instead of just insulting us?”

“I will do something helpful,” Peter informs him. “I’ll find her first.”

With that, he lunges for the apartment door, and is out of the tiny room and down the hall before they can stop him. Peter hears the thunder of footsteps after him, but he hurries down the stairs and out of the building. He has the advantage of being quick on his feet; if Neverland taught him anything, it’s how to run when you don’t want to be found.

Peter emerges into the bright sunshine of the city and stops dead in his tracks. He’s not used to the modern world, how the knives of its buildings slash up into the sky, how loud it is with those cars and signs and people. Peter swears he can even see metal things in the sky, soaring along predestined paths. It’s all so much compared to the world he used to know. No wonder some of the others had a hard time adjusting. His mortal heart lets out a pang of sympathy.

The door of the apartment building flies open, revealing Emma and the others hot on his trail. Peter curses under his breath and takes off in one direction, hurtling around pedestrians and shooting down the sidewalk. He heads for smaller streets, hoping to lose them in a swarm of alleyways. The others, more used to the terrain of the modern city, are gaining on him, and Peter is just starting to think that he’ll never be able to shake them when someone grabs him and pulls him into a nearby building.

Peter’s first instinct is to defend himself, but when he isn’t attacked, he realizes that the stranger is only trying to help him. There’s a window just to his left, and Peter watches Emma and the others appear seconds after him. They didn’t see him enter the shop, and keep sprinting down the road in the direction they thought he’d gone. Peter waits a few more intense moments, then decides that he’s lost them for good and turns back around to see who’s gone to the trouble of rescuing him.

He’s greeted with the sight of a girl about his age. She’s eyeing him cautiously, although the corners of her lips begin to prick up with a wicked grin. “Sorry for the rough introduction, but you looked like you needed some help,” she tells him.

Peter lets out a short laugh. “I’m glad to be rid of them, that’s for sure.”

The girl arches a brow. “What, did they catch you shoplifting? I’ve never seen people run that fast unless they were getting chased by the cops.”

Peter narrows his eyes, trying to figure out how on earth he would lift a shop, then decides it’s probably some slang term he doesn’t know. “Something like that,” he says evasively.

He studies the girl’s face to see if he’d answered correctly, and, judging by her impressed grin, he had. “Nice,” she says. “I’m Y/N, by the way.”

“Peter,” he replies. He gets the urge to introduce himself as he usually would– Peter, Peter Pan– then remembers at the last second that Emma had warned him about telling people who he was. Apparently, telling people he was a fictional character in their world wouldn’t go over too well.

“Peter,” the girl repeats. “Nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you, too,” Peter says, and realizes belatedly that he means it. He feels like how he had at the start of it all, when the Lost Boys had first started appearing on this island, but this feeling is far stronger. He wants to get to know this girl. He certainly doesn’t want her to leave.

“I’m new to the city,” he says abruptly. “Any chance you could show me around?”

Y/N laughs, surprised. “You’re new and you’re already in trouble? You’ll fit right in, Peter.”

He grins, in on the joke a half beat late. “I like to have fun, that’s all.”

“Well,” Y/N says, starting to lead him back towards the door of the shop, “I like fun, too. Maybe we should stick together.”

“I’d like that,” Peter says, then wonders why he’s being so honest all of a sudden. When he sees Y/N’s smile– real this time, not sarcastic or joking, but genuinely because of him– he thinks he knows why.

The two of them step back out into the light. “Where to first?” Peter asks.

“I was going to ask you that,” Y/N replies. “What do you want to do? Sightseeing, maybe? We can get some food, or just talk.”

“Anything,” he says. He’d follow her anywhere. The feeling in him right now is like nothing he’s ever felt before. The pain in his chest, Peter realizes with some surprise, is gone. He feels immortal. Like living in this one moment could last forever.

They end up spending the next few hours together. Y/N shows him around the city, taking Peter to her favorite spots. Peter stares at the vast cityscape and finally starts to understand why someone might choose the modern world over the natural one. He’ll always pick Neverland first, of course, but seeing the world through Y/N’s eyes, it makes sense.

The two of them get along like a house on fire. Y/N’s got this rebellious streak to her that fits in perfectly with Peter’s, well, Peter-ness. No joke is too dark, no sarcastic comment too caustic. They feel the same. Peter doesn’t think he’s ever met someone who thinks so much like him.

As the sun starts to set in the sky, Peter feels his spirits sinking. He doesn’t want to let go of this day, not when he knows it can never happen again. He’s supposed to be finding Henry’s spell-girl, but all Peter wants to do is spend more time with Y/N.

His mood is especially ruined when they turn a corner and find Henry Mills walking towards them. Peter’s eyes widen and he tries to steer Y/N back in the direction they’d come, but it’s too late. Henry lets out an audible gasp and starts hurrying towards them.

“Peter,” Henry calls out when he’s close enough to talk, “We’ve been looking for you all over! Where have you been?”

Y/N glances at Henry dubiously. “Who’s this?”

“My little brother,” Peter blurts out.

At the same time, Henry chimes in, “My friend from school.”

Peter shoots the younger boy a quick glare, then turns back to Y/N. “Both, actually. He’s my step-brother. Recent marriage. We’re still getting acclimated. Our family is a little chaotic.”

“You can say that again,” Henry mumbles. Peter fights the urge to butcher him.

While Peter silently advises himself on why murder would be bad at a time like this, Henry stares openly at Y/N. All of a sudden, the boy’s mouth hangs open. “Oh my gosh, it’s you.”

Y/N’s brow furrows. “Excuse me?”

All of a sudden, Peter feels a sick sensation in his stomach. It couldn’t be. It couldn’t.

“You’re the girl from my dream,” Henry announces. “We’ve been looking for you.”

Y/N looks back at Peter. “What’s he talking about?”

The open, carefree expression, which had been on her face all day, is starting to be replaced with deep, unsettled fear. Peter hates to see it directed at him. “There’s something I need to tell you,” he begins. “Something about yourself.”

“You’re sounding a little creepy right now,” Y/N warns him. “Get to the point.”

“Alright,” Peter says. “You’re magical. So am I. We need your help to break a curse and save my life. How about that?”

Y/N shakes her head quickly. “This is crazy. Magic isn’t real.”

Peter can’t lose her, not like this, so he leans forward and holds out his hand. A ball of light appears inside his cupped fingers, glowing and bright. It’s a simple charm, one of the first he learned, but it has the desired effect.

Y/N stares at it, transfixed, and when she speaks again, her voice is hushed. “That’s impossible.”

“Nothing is impossible,” Peter says. “Not magic. Not even the fact that you would find me in this city by accident. Magic is drawn to magic.”

Y/N’s eyes slowly raise to meet his. “This is real, then. I have magic.”

“You have magic,” Peter confirms. “Come with us, we can show you. They’re good people, Y/N. You can trust them.”

It’s the closest he’s ever come to honesty. For once, Peter isn’t playing a game. He isn’t trying to trick Y/N over to his side. He just wants her to be safe, and he knows that isn’t through lies.

Y/N smiles at him. “I trust you, Peter. That’s enough for me.”

She reaches over and takes his hand. Now that he’s focusing on it, Peter can feel the slow loop of her magic when they touch. It feels like power, but more than that, it feels like life. A life with her, maybe. A life for both of them.

ouat tag list: @loveanimals0000, @eclliipsed, @w1shes43, @lost-ender

all tags list: @wordsarelife

28 notes · View notes

neet-elite · 1 day

Text

↳ EVENT 06. M!Kylar (Incest)

Pairing: Big Brother M!Kylar / F!Reader Genre: Smut 18+ WC: 2,509 Warnings: incest, bath sex, yandere, creampie, cockwarming, stockholm syndrome, riding, breeding Prompt(s): 07 — incest Event Masterlist: CLICK HERE!!

A/N: i dunno what inspired me to take a softer approach to this request, but i've been enjoying writing the really loving requests... so i hope that this is still enjoyable !! i also think kylar suits this prompt the most, so it was super fun to explore!!! tysm!

After a long, exhausting, and humiliating day of school (or as Kylar likes to affectionately call it, imprisonment), there is simply nothing better to cap the awful experience off than to indulge in some alone time with his favourite little sister. His only little sister, the light of his life, the sole joy he experiences in this shitty world and his shitty life. To say that he relies on you for all of his comfort and happiness would be an understatement— he saps it. Leeching off of you from the moment he enters home, calling out for your attention before the front door is even closed. And the fact that you're none the wiser only encourages him to use you some more, forever pushing you to your limits to hopefully break you in as his own.

And tonight is no special exception. Away from prying eyes, in the safety of four thin walls, he begs for your affections once again. Dragging you into his room to spend the night together, just like always. And it's comforting to know that even after all the bullshit bullying he has to endure during the day, he can always count on his precious little sister to make it all worthwhile. God, he'd go through near death beatings daily if it meant he got to wrap his arms around you at the end of it all, nice and snug and soft, pretty little sister in his arms for him to coddle and coo at. Because he loves you so much, he's willing to endure whatever it takes to keep you out of harms way; so much so that he willingly puts himself into dangerous situations just to make sure you don't need to leave your shared home for any reason.

The world doesn't deserve your kindness. The town is unworthy of your cuteness, undeserving of your sweetness. Or; perhaps he's just being a selfish big brother, right? Keeping you all to himself, locked away in his tower for self serving reasons.

Like to be the only one to hear your barely audible little whimpers, how soft and pretty you sound right now, especially when his knuckles brush against your wet cheek and you shiver into him. Fuck, feels so good, doesn't it? He knows he does, playfully biting down on his bottom lip— unchecked confidence flowing through him now that he's only with you. It's funny, actually, how no one outside these four walls would assume just how cocky he can get, reserving that side of himself just for you. It's only fair, he thinks. He gets to see sides of you that no one else does, and in return, you receive authority over every aspect of your life, all in an effort to keep you safe. An innocent enough want, though he's well aware of just how degenerate he can get. How far he can twist relative honesty.

It's the least he could do for you, considering all you've got to do is exist and he's happy. Do you even know the things he goes through for you? How much trouble it is to actually keep you healthy and secure? It's like keeping a pet, only more rewarding when you take hold of his hand, little fingers locking with his own before dipping them back under the water together.

So cute! You're so fucking cute it pains him, heart hurting at the way your silky skin rubs against his own, tits pressed snugly to his chest, secured only by the warm water surrounding him. The skin on skin contact just gets to him— it's one of his favourite ways to spend time with you. Naked, bare, ignoring the moral implications of playing with his baby sister in such a disgusting way; he plays with you in far worse ways anyway. But the connection coursing through him, from your fingertips to his own, is unmatched. Causes his cock to tremble inside of you, his eyes instinctively rolling and then squeezing shut at the tight fit inside of your cunt.

It's bath time! he'd ordered you once home, pants already tenting from the way you excitedly started running the water at the mere mention of some valued bath time with big brother.

C'mere, sit on my lap he'd encouraged you once getting in the too hot water, but a little burning isn't gonna stop him from hanging out with his baby sister, now is it?

Wanna sit on it? he'd asked you once feeling you squirming around, wiggling your baby sister butt on his fat cock like routine. It's not the first time he's impaled your angel cunt in the water, and it certainly won't be the last. A regular enough occurrence at this rate that he knows cock is what you're after when he mentions bathing— not that he's any better, looking forward to getting you wet in the bath just so he can shove his dirty big brother cock inside of you again and again— routine.

It's only natural, he thinks. Given that you're disallowed from seeing anyone else, let alone any other suitors, that you'd want to explore things like sex and orgasms with your big brother. Which is luckily all according to his plan, to seclude you enough to make you think that it's your choice to date him. Greedy cock twitching inside your pretty little hole as you idly rub a thumb up and down his held hand, allowing him to slide down the tub just a little to reposition his cock at a better angle inside of you. If he keeps you all to himself like this, leaving you no other choice but to date and fuck and kiss and marry your big brother, then he can die happy.

"What did you do today?" He mundanely asks, but it's more of a grunt than anything else. Winded by the unfairly tight squeeze of your cunt, wrapped sooooo nicely around him, God, he'd kill for that cunt, yknow?

You take a second to answer, clearly preoccupied with not shifting around too much as he feels you tense up on his cock at the sound of his voice. Pretty baby, big brother will always protect you, okay?

"The usual," you yawn, and he has half a mind to pull out of your pretty pussy to instead stuff your open maw full with cock. "Mostly waited for you to get home, Ky."

Oh, how the affectionate nickname you've taken to calling him goes straight through him, fat beads of precum staining your insides all gloopy as a proclamation of love. His pretty little stockholm sister, are you even away of the things you do to him? How the banality of it all, taking a simple bath with you, is the lewdest part. Cock pulsing against your squishy insides while your tits ride against his chest, primal need dictating him to let go of your hand in favour of placing both hands on the small of your back. A little pressure added there to really make you feel the weight of your words, and by extension, the weight of his cock.

Your reaction is immediate, a sharp little squeak that he wants to force out of you again and again— but there is joy to be had in taking things slow, too. Like how when he lifts a hand up to your soaked hair to pet at, he's privy to the view of your wet cat like stare back at him, pretty pout and all. He leans down, giving you a chaste kiss on the lips as a reward for being so cute for him. "Don't you get bored of waiting for me every day? Aren't you doing something else?" He tests you, resting his chin at the top of your head to force you into listening to how hard his heart beats for you; in time with how fast his cock pulses with need.

"I— No... Seeing big brother again is my favourite thing!" You protest, and it's difficult to remain in his calm, cool, and collected big brother composure when you're whining so prettily for him like that, a little moan at the end from the way he rolls his hips against your own in the face of your absolute devotion.

Perfect, he thinks. You're already his, so he can do whatever he wants to you, right?

And while having you cockwarm him is one of his favourite pastimes, he'd be lying if he said he could do it all night. Much to his disappointment, though he tries every single bath time to do just that, your high pitched gasps and sweet little sighs coax him into movement without fail. A gentle back and forth to begin with, moving you up and down his cock with ease more so than moving himself— you can always count on big brother, okay?

And yet, domesticity calls to him. Begs to keep the slow pace, to let you hump him mindlessly once he's kickstarted your movement. You're a good girl, you know to keep moving, yeah? A simple up and down while he twirls your wet hair, gently cupping the back of your head with one hand, the other finding home on your ass to pinch and tug on your cheek. There's not a thought to be had in that dumb little sister brain of yours, is there? And there better not be, given how hard he works to make sure that there isn't. Rock hard cock stroking your insides gently, at your own pace, a satisfied hum escaping him when you huff and puff up and down his length.

"Good answer— ah—" he rewards you with a rushed moan, wrapping his body even tighter around you to get as close as possible to his little sister, wanting more than anything to melt into you, become so connected through the leaking precum dirtying your insides that all you can think about is him— because all he can think about is you, it's only fair! Even if you've proven yourself thus far to surround your world with him, he doesn't think he'll ever be able to get enough of you. Convinced by your devotion to thrust his cock up just a little, enough to knock you off balance and further into his greedy hold. "Waiting for big brothers cock?" He urges you to continue, to fuck his perverted length faster, fuck yourself stupid on big brother, okay baby?

You let out a muffled mhm!, moaned directly against his chest, heat rising to his cheeks from how cute you can be when doing something so immoral. You actually enjoy fucking big brother? Gross, he sneers internally. Only, the fact that you take part and also relish in something as vulgar as this tugs on his heart. Has his mind reeling with affections for you, grabbing a greedy fistful of your ass to aid in your bounces up and down.

Water splashes around him, the pace of your tiny humps quickening the harsher he grabs you. To the point that he has to use both hands on your pretty body, literally picking you up and letting you drop back down on his cock with insatiable need.

"Fuck, I can't— you're too good at this." he half laughs, sinking further into the water so as to allow you enough room to properly straddle him, every bounce you make on his fat cock leaving him more than a little breathless as he struggles to keep up with your thirst. Chest tight with the sight of you indulging yourself to his cock, using him just as much as he uses you on a daily basis. Oh how he loves it, to be at the receiving end of your adoration, your warm cunt sucking him further in with ever fuck, prompting his hips to hump upwards out of sheer desperation to match your sibling fucking energy.

Greedy as he is though, his hands settle possessively on your hips. Aiding in your movements in a selfish manner, forcing you to grind your puffy clit against him every time you slam your ass back down against his lap.

More than anything he strives to make you happy. Everything, literally everything he does is for you. Guided by your smile, aided by your laughter. He loves you so much, didn't you know? It's why he's helping you fuck yourself dumb on his cock, thoughtlessly thrusting in tandem with your humps, moaning out for you just as much as you sob his name. Over and over, his favourite song.

And like the good big brother he is, he knows when you're close. Takes over the job of fucking when you grow too weak to continue, despite the water splishing over his face. He'd drown if it meant you got to cum, honestly.

Rather than state the obvious, he focuses solely on helping you get there. Cooing and tutting and staring at your scrunched up pretty expression. He'll have to give you so many kisses afterwards for allowing him the privilege to see that cute face later on. Helping you grind your hips down on him in a way that his groin rubs your clit just the way you like, preferring to keep you seated there as your nails dig into his chest for slippery stability, taking to fucking his cock as deep as possible from your stationary seated position. He's barely moving, relying on the twitches and throbs of his cock inside for stimulation. But fuck— baby sister cunt feels so good, how your insides squirm around and suck his cock off so well, pretty whines spilling for him in abundance.

He stares at your face, only so that he can watch you fall apart on his big cock. Because the cut off sob you let out, followed by a gasp of his name before your moth falls open in a silent beg is so cute, fuck, he can't stop himself from cumming too. Not when your hole wraps tighter than ever around his intrusion, bullying his way inside your cunt to shoot his load as deep as possible, aiming to breed his baby sister bitch as payment for sticking by him when no one else would. Promising a future you've yet to learn about simply because you're too cute to hold back, painting your insides sticky white to mix with the bath water when he inevitably pushes some out with deep thrusts.

Gushy little cunt, still spasming around his length when he's done filling you up. It's a good thing you're in the bath with him after all, quietly cooing to you in soft privacy to get up, let him clean you while you're here. There's no one here to tell you how wrong it is for him to not only breed your cute hole, but to also clean it up afterwards with his fingers sneakily entering to scissor around a little.

And he hopes to keep you this way. Dumb, obedient, and oblivious. It's when his favourite little sister is at her cutest.

#500 event!#kylar the loner #kylar smut #dol smut #degrees of lewdity smut #dol fanfic #degrees of lewdity fanfic

32 notes · View notes

rookie98writes · 3 days

Text

How Could You? —Chapter 3—

Part of the For Your Own Good Series Prev Chapter → Next Work

Relationship: Hatake Kakashi x fem!Reader

Rating: General

Warnings: the angst continues! canon rewrite. self-ship coded; please see author's note on series page if you are unfamiliar with plot-significant characteristics of reader.

Word Count: 4.4k

Work Summary: After waking from Itachi's Mangekyo Sharingan attack, Kakashi finds there is still a lot of work to do; in rebuilding the village, restoring trust within his team, and in being honest with you. But will his efforts strengthen those bonds, or will everything only get worse?

AO3 Link

After a few more well-wishes to Naruto for a quick recovery, you made a half-hearted excuse to take your leave. You just didn’t feel like you belonged there. Sakura had left after telling Naruto her intentions to come along in the future, and Lady Tsunade started looking over Naruto’s chart and giving him updates on the others from the mission, while he and Shikamaru told each other highlights of the fights they both endured after being separated. But they were all…smiling. Naruto was describing one of Orochimaru’s henchman—some guy who used his own bones as weapons—and he was smiling. Laughing. Joking.

He had been on the brink of death a few times from the sound of it. But he only smiled and became more resolute. Same with Sakura, and even Shikamaru. It just didn’t seem right. You’d always known that shinobi were essential for the safety of the village, but for these kids to be reacting like this? And then Kakashi’s complete dismissal of you was the cherry on top.

You ended up wandering the village. You didn’t think your father or Ayame would be of any comfort. Neither of them would be able to actually be able to offer any insight, or probably even understand where you were coming from. You tried to see Iruka, but he was out on a mission since the village was still overworked. Most likely, Shikamaru would be given another assignment soon, considering his injuries were minor. Kakashi might have already been sent back out if Shizune had been able to find him.

You were nearing the big tree in the village center when you heard someone shout.

“Y/N!” Gai ran over to you.

“Oh, hello Gai.”

“I just returned from a mission, and I was just about to get some delicious dumplings! Please, come join me! It will be my treat!”

“Oh…I’m not sure I’m such good company right now.”

“Nonsense! You're better company than anyone! Please, I insist.”

And insist, he did. While you knew that Gai would be the absolute last person to ever force you into a situation you weren’t comfortable with, he linked his arm with yours and led you toward the dumpling stand with so much speed, you were tripping over your own feet. But this might be the best option you hadn’t considered. With Iruka’s absence and Kakashi’s evasion, Gai would probably be a uniquely perfect sympathetic ear.

The restaurant wasn’t too crowded when you arrived, and Gai continued herding you until you sat down at a booth in the back corner. The man looked completely in his element, greeting both the waitress and chef by name and placing an intimidatingly large order without even glancing at the menu. You were about to skim through to find something befitting your ruined appetite, but the taijutsu master plucked your menu from your hands and gave it to the waitress without a thought.

“Don’t worry,” he smiled. “Those combination platters I ordered cover every single type they serve here! Today, we feast!”

His enthusiasm was pretty infectious. As heavily as everything was still weighing on your mind, you couldn’t help but smile along with Gai while the waitress came by and gave you each a glass of water and a tea.

“Ah, there’s that springtime smile!” Gai took a full sip of his beverage before slamming it down on the table with his standard level of gusto. “Now, Y/N, tell me. Why would you ever say you aren’t good company?”

“Well,” you started tentatively, using one finger to draw a meaningless pattern in the condensation on your glass and avoiding eye contact. “Kakashi and I kind of had a fight.”

“Ah, Kakashi,” Gai sighed. “Sometimes my rival’s blood runs too hot for his own good.”

“It’s a little more complicated than that.” You took a sip of tea to collect your thoughts. It wasn’t easy to summarize everything that had happened, since Gai didn’t even really know the entirety of the mission to recover Sasuke. But you did the best you could, starting with Sasuke leaving in the middle of the night and all the events that happened as a result: the five-man recovery squad, Kakashi running after them, the state of everyone when they finally made it back to the village.

Gai’s order started coming out of the kitchen, but the man didn’t take his attention off you as you got to the immediate issue: Kakashi suddenly turning ice-cold, telling you all those heart-breaking things. You couldn’t maintain eye contact, but the array of dumplings was a great distraction. Turned out, you were hungrier than you realized, the smells of the food making your mouth water as you spoke.

“Eat something,” Gai encouraged you, “please.”

You smiled gratefully and gathered a few different types on your plate. “Thank you, Gai.”

“Anything for my rival’s beautiful and passionate girlfriend,” he beamed and popped a dumpling in his mouth. His face went through a range of emotion; bliss at the flavor of the food, then empathetic as he remembered what you’d been saying. He swallowed the full bite heavily. “I know how Kakashi can be,” he started. “Please, allow me to apologize for his actions!”

You shook your head. “I’m not upset with him; I’m worried about him,” you explained. “He’s blaming himself for what happened with Naruto and Sasuke. He acted like he had just abandoned them, when nothing could be further from the truth.”

“He has always put the full pressure on himself,” Gai agreed, “even when we were children.”

“I just hate how hard it is on everyone.” You ate another dumpling to try and squash the despair rising in your chest, but it wasn’t quite enough. “I saw Naruto before I left the hospital. And he’s just so determined to go back out there after Sasuke as soon as he’s healed. He’s so upset with himself, that he couldn’t get Sasuke to come home. And those other boys who went with him. Shikamaru is upset that his mission failed, and Sakura is a wreck even though she’s trying to hide it. And Kakashi…”

“He lashed out,” Gai nodded solemnly, a knowing look in his eye like he had been in your shoes many times.

“He said I have no idea what it means to be a shinobi, and after seeing those kids, I’m starting to wonder if he’s right.”

Gai sat thoughtfully for a minute, taking a sip of his tea before he stared at you meaningfully. “It’s true that Kakashi is right more often than he’s wrong,” Gai grinned. “But in this case, he’s undeniably mistaken. With your compassion, you have everything it takes to understand what it means to be a shinobi.” His look was just as compassionate as he claimed you to be. “Kakashi will realize that soon. Otherwise, people will start to say that I’m the smart one.”

You laughed despite yourself, finally feeling the weight lift from your heart. “I love him so much. And I don’t know how to help him. He says he wants to be alone and I can understand that but…I don’t want him to think that he really is alone, you know?”

Tears gathered in Gai’s eyes as he beamed a giant smile in your direction. “So beautiful,” he wailed, the tears beginning to fall and soak into the dumplings on his plate. “Kakashi is so lucky to have you, someone who cares so deeply for him and understands him. I truly believe that you are the perfect match for him.” He snatched you into a tight hug and you could feel the river of grateful tears flooding your shoulder.

His outburst distracted the majority of the restaurant, and even though they weren’t particularly busy, you felt heat in your cheeks as you noticed all the attention on you. “Th-thanks Gai,” you stuttered.

Gai leaned off of you, looking slightly chagrined. “I apologize. It just fills my heart with so much happiness to see how passionately you feel for my best friend and eternal rival!”

You couldn’t help but smile at the exuberant shinobi. Even Kakashi’s detached tone as he spoke of his friend couldn’t disguise the effect that Gai had on him or the fondness they had for one another. You had to admit that it moved you.

“Well, I’m just glad he’s had you all this time.”

Fresh tears welled in Gai’s eyes, but he forced them back. “Like I said, I know how Kakashi can be. But that just means I also know why he can be like that. And I have seen so many people give up on him.” He put his hand on your shoulder, absolutely beaming at you. “It makes me very happy that you are different.”

He ate another dumpling and you smiled. “Thanks for bringing me here, Gai. You and I should spend more time together.”

“ABSOLUTELY!” he pulled you into another hug, nearly knocking the wind from your chest as you laughed.

The rest of the meal just continued to lift your spirits, you and Gai sharing easy conversation and funny stories with one another as more and more of the feast of dumplings disappeared. You shouldn’t have been surprised, but Gai attacked the platters with the same level of enthusiasm as he did everything. Before long, you were both reaching your limits (although you suspected he would happily eat twice as much if this were one of his rival contests).

Gai excused himself to take care of the bill, waving away your offer of ryō so quickly you were worried his wrist might snap. As you waited for him to return to the table, you overheard the conversation of two men sitting a few tables down.

“Did you hear?” one asked his friend. “Sasuke Uchiha abandoned the village to join up with Orochimaru. And that kid Naruto nearly died trying to bring him back!”

Your posture stiffened at their topic. The man spoke so casually, it churned the partially-digested dumplings in your stomach.

“Man, I get that they don’t have any parents, but someone oughta take responsibility for them. Don’t they have a sensei or something?” the friend responded.

The guy scoffed. “Hatake?”

“Hmph, that explains it. Cold-Blooded Kakashi strikes again.”

“Ha, he ran out of friends, so now instead of Friend-Killer, I guess he’s Kid-Killer Kakashi!”

“HEY.” The exclamation was out of your throat before you even had a chance to think about it. But you wouldn’t have taken it back even if you had the chance.

The men both looked unimpressed by your interruption. “What?”

“Don’t talk about him like that.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Kakashi Hatake. You don’t know him at all. So get his name out of your mouths.”

The men shared an amused look, like they were speaking to a child. “Excuse me?” the first man asked, turning back to you and resting his chin on his palm.

“Kakashi isn’t cold-blooded. He was out of the village on a mission when Orochimaru lured Sasuke out of the village, and Naruto was gone before Kakashi got back. But he didn’t waste a second before going after them, even though he had just been through hell. So how dare you talk about him like that? Just who the hell do you think you are?!”

“Us?” the guy laughed. “Who’re you, Hatake’s cheerleader?”

“I said…get his name out of your disgusting mouth.”

“Hey now, what gives you the right to make assumptions about my mouth?” the man sneered, leaning closer and meeting your challenge. “You haven’t been properly acquainted with it.”

“That’s enough!” Gai bellowed, appearing out of nowhere and diving between you and the man to create a human barrier. “Y/N, you don’t have to listen to this.”

“Now hold on, she and I were having a conversation. I’m just dying to know why someone like her would bother defending that worthless—"

You launched yourself at the man before you even considered the consequences. Thankfully, Gai’s superhuman reflexes caught you before you were able to make any contact and likely hurt only yourself. And even better, you surprised both of the jerks enough that they finally shut up.

Gai set you back on your feet and gave you a quick look to either warn or ask you not to try something like that again. It really shocked you how quickly Gai could switch from carefree to serious without losing a hint of credibility. Quickly coming back to your senses, you folded your hands behind your back and looked at the floor.

“Now,” Gai began, looking back at the men at the table. “Simply apologize to my friend, and we’ll be on our way.”

“Why should I apologize?” the man scoffed. “She’s the one who jumped into our conversation, then got all hysterical. The way I see it, she oughta apologize.”

Like hell I’ll apologize. Gai must have felt the way you bristled behind him, reaching back and placing his hand on your arm to ground you. “Don’t worry about these guys, Y/N. They aren’t worth it. Let’s go.”

He waited to allow you to leave first, keeping himself between you and those assholes in case either side started up again. The men must have realized who they were dealing with and decided to leave well enough alone, keeping quiet. You did offer the workers of the restaurant a genuine apology as you passed them, but they waved it away as though you hadn’t caused a scene. Still, as you made your way back to the center of the village, you felt that one more apology was necessary.

“I’m sorry Gai. I should have controlled myself better back there. I’m not even really sure what came over me.”

“I know exactly what came over you,” he beamed with pride. “All of the hot-blooded feelings you have for Kakashi sent you rushing to his defense, and it was a joy to see. But to ensure your safety, I had to put a stop to it.”

“You were right to.” You smiled and hugged him. “I think I’m going to head home. Get my adrenaline back to normal. I’m not sure how shinobi keep this up all the time,” you laughed.

Gai responded with a loud guffaw and a clap on your back. “Thank you again for your company today!”

This time, you pulled him into the hug. “Thanks for everything.”

⁂

Obito…

Kakashi’s hair hung limp in his face as he stared at the Memorial Stone. His feet were planted in a spot so familiar, he could feel the indents of his sandals in the earth. Proof of how often he had to admit his shortcomings.

“I’m sorry, Obito.” Kakashi spoke evenly and quietly. “I’m no better of a jōnin than I was when I let you down. And now, I’ve let down the last member of your clan.” His breath hitched. “Obito, I let down everyone. I still haven’t learned how to protect my comrades. I’m still…I’m still losing them. I’ve lost my entire team. Again.”

Kakashi’s hands trembled at his sides. “I thought things would be different. I thought I could live up to what you said. I tried…I tried to teach them the same lessons you taught me. The way that Minato-sensei taught us. My students remind me so much of our team. I should have known exactly what they needed. But I failed as a sensei. I wasn’t cut out to teach them. I couldn’t even recognize that Naruto and Sasuke were on the brink of killing each other. I was…”

Naïve. Distracted. In love.

“I was happy, Obito.” The honesty opened a chasm in his chest. “I should have known it couldn’t last. But I didn’t, and it cost those kids everything.”

That. That was the crux of it.

Kakashi had made peace with the fact that you were too good for him, and his time with you would certainly not be endless. He had been prepared to be with you for as long as you wanted him. But it had gotten to the point where he needed to make that call for you. If he had accepted the truth sooner, stopped delaying the inevitable, maybe he could have prevented what happened to his team.

If he had just let you go, been less selfish, put all his focus on his students…this visit to the Memorial Stone could have been completely different.

“RIVAL!”

Not now…

Kakashi turned to see Gai walking up to him with that big, stupid smile he always had. Kakashi aimed his most withering stare at his rival, but Gai chose to take no notice, walking up as though Kakashi had invited him.

“What is it, Gai?”

“I had a feeling I would find you here, Kakashi.”

“…Is there a problem?”

“No, not at all. But I heard what happened. And I just wanted to check on you, see if there was anything I could do to help.”

Unless you know where Orochimaru is—where Sasuke is—what help could you possibly be?

“Also, I ran into Y/N in town.”

Every one of his nerves lit up at your name. “Y/N?”

“She was upset, Kakashi.” Gai softly chastised him. “I know that what you’re going through is horrible. But please, don’t take it out on her.”

I never wanted to, he mentally defended himself. But I had to.

“What’s done is done, Gai,” Kakashi answered. “It’s over between us.”

Gai seemed confused. “You…broke up with her?”

“Well, no,” he admitted. I couldn’t force myself to do it. “But I did pick a fight. And after the way I spoke to her, she would be justified in cursing my name.”

Gai started laughing. Kakashi looked at him with fury in his eye, but Gai held up a hand to beg his friend and rival to show mercy. “I’m sorry Kakashi. I don’t mean to laugh. But actually, it’s quite the opposite.”

“What?”

“When I found Y/N, I could tell she was upset, and I invited her to lunch. While we were preparing to leave, she overheard an off-color comment about you. And Kakashi, she went up to the men and responded with a white-hot youthful outrage that I didn’t think someone of her stature would be able to produce! Defending you with the passion and conviction of a woman who’s witnessed her lover hang the stars themselves!”

What the hell is she doing? Kakashi was torn. The idea that you felt strongly enough to defend him tugged his heart in all different directions. Whoever this was that you overheard, Kakashi was sure this would just be the start of it. He had understood the importance of being entrusted as the mentor to the last surviving Uchiha and the nine-tailed fox jinchūriki, and although he could think of a hundred reasons why he wasn’t fit for the job, he had agreed to the Third Hokage’s request, only to fail even more spectacularly than he could have imagined.

Soon, the entire village would be saying all the same things. He would never ask or expect you to take on that animosity. It terrified him. But more than that, it angered him. Infuriated him; that you would be subjected to such hostility—that people would direct even a small portion of that disdain toward you—because you still cared for him, despite the terrible things he had done.

Well then. The answer was simple.

If the problem was that you cared about him…he would make you stop.

“Kakashi?” Gai addressed him, pulling him from his thoughts. “What’s wrong?”

“She shouldn’t have done that,” Kakashi responded, his voice low and simmering.

“Rival, she—”

“I don’t want her to do that.”

Gai blinked a few times before softening his expression. “She loves you, Kakashi.”

“She shouldn’t do that either,” he snapped. “I don’t wa—”

“RIVAL.” Gai cut him off. “Don’t you dare say you don’t want her to love you. I won’t allow you to lie to me.”

Kakashi looked again at the memorial stone. His eye locked onto Obito’s name automatically. His old teammate, now only an etching on this monument, because of mistakes Kakashi had made and could never take back.

“I told her I love her…right before I left for that mission.”

Gai’s voice softened. “Kakashi, that’s wonderf—”

“No. It isn’t,” he argued. “Everything fell apart after that. Things I should have been able to prevent. I don’t want her to be dragged down by my mistakes.”

“Well, she—”

He faced his friend with venom in his uncovered eye. “I won’t let her.”

Kakashi ran, leaving Gai and Obito behind. He could hear Gai’s objections, but he wasn’t about to turn back and give his irresponsibly goofy friend the opportunity to try and change his mind.

He heaved a sigh of frustration. Why were you making this even more difficult than it already was? He had been an absolute jerk to you back in the hospital. He had taken your offers of help and reassurance and thrown them back in your face. When you’d heard whatever grievances the man at the dumpling shop had, you should have joined right in.

Not that the thought of you striking up a conversation with a new man didn’t turn Kakashi’s stomach inside out. His feet skidded on the ground. It had been hard enough accepting that you wouldn’t be his anymore, but he hadn’t considered that there would be nothing stopping you from giving yourself to someone else. Could he honestly stand it if he saw you hand in hand with someone new? Smiling that perfect smile at some other man?

A selfish instinct kept him perfectly still. Maybe he should change his mind. Maybe this was his chance to take it all back. He could just apologize, and you would stay by his side, offering him all your love without question. Sure, the rest of the village would still hate him. But he could keep you.

And then everyone would turn on you, as well.

No. This was the only way he could protect you, and that was what he wanted more than anything. He just hated that that meant he had to be even more cruel. It was sadistic, that protecting you meant hurting you. But it had to be done.

He couldn’t be selfish. He’d already had far more of you than he deserved to have. He would do it quickly; hurt you one last time, so he couldn’t hurt you any more in the future.

With his mind set in stone, Kakashi was able to track you down easily. You were just walking through the park, seeming a bit listless in the way you moved.

“Y/N.”

You whipped around at the sound of his voice. “Kakashi! H-hi.”

The look on your face could have broken his heart all over again. You were surprised to see him, but more than that, you looked happy. Hopeful, like you thought he had sought you out to take everything back.

And here he was, getting ready to hurt you all over again.

“I need to talk to you.”

A tremor ran through his body when he saw the soft, secure look in your eyes. You nodded and willingly stepped closer to him, blind to the fact that he was a danger to you. Like he wasn’t a threatening, cold-blooded monster.

Wordlessly, he quickly guided you to his apartment. It was close and private. Not to mention he wouldn’t invite himself into your home, especially under these pretenses.

As soon as he whisked you inside, he shut the door to block out the unnecessary hatred and negativity that nipped at his heels. He was about to create enough of that himself; he surely didn’t need help from the rest of the village. Kakashi refused to turn and look at you, frustrated by what he had to do.

“So…” You blinked a little nervously as he failed to speak. “What did you want to talk to me about?”

He sighed, letting his head fall against the door. “Gai told me what happened. In the dumpling shop.”

“Oh,” you blushed at the memory. “I—”

Abruptly, he turned to face you, cutting you off before you had a chance to continue. “Don’t do anything like that again.”

“I…I’m sorry…” you stammered, taken back by his tone. “I didn’t mean to embarrass you.”

“That’s not—” His fingers curled into tight fists before he pushed his hitai-ate up and pulled his mask to his neck. “Just…stay out of it, Y/N.”

“But…” The look on your face went firm and defensive. “Kakashi, he said that you—”

“I don’t care what he said.”

“I do care!”

“Well don’t!” he thundered. Your mouth dropped open, stunned that the two of you were falling into an argument again. “You shouldn’t have done anything, Y/N. I don’t need your help, and I don’t need your pity. So just leave it alone.”

“It isn’t pity, you—”

“Stop.” He could feel the way his stare was wearing you down. “Stop defending me, stop taking my side.” It hurt like a blade, inwardly acknowledging everything else that you would stop. Stop loving me. “Just stop.”

You held eye contact for longer than he would have expected of anyone else, but he knew just how persistent you could be. “Why?” The question escaped your mouth on a shaky exhale. “Why wouldn’t I take your side when you’ve done nothing wrong?”

Kakashi turned back to the door, hiding the pain that was threatening to show through the cracks. “That was all I had to say,” he finished, opening the door to let you walk out of his life forever.

“Kakashi…” You walked up to him, putting a hand on his shoulder. He refused to turn, wishing to just block out your words. “What are you doing? Please, talk to me.”

“There’s nothing else to talk about. You should leave.”

“I know that you feel guilty for what happened to Sasuke and Naruto. And I know I can’t understand it but…can’t we just talk about it? I don’t expect to resolve everything tonight, but I don’t want to leave you like this again.”

He had to say it. It was for your own good, and you weren’t going to give him a choice. He had used all his usual tricks on you; acted as immature as the arrogant child he used to be; the reason people saw him as cold-blooded. But you were refusing to see him that way. So he looked away, and said the only thing you couldn’t misinterpret, no matter how badly he wanted you to.

“I’m telling you to leave me, Y/N. For good.”

► masterlist

#kakashi x reader #kakashi hatake x reader #kakashi angst #kakashi fanfiction #kakashi x y/n #reader insert #rookie wrote

27 notes · View notes

rainbowonice · 19 hours

Note

I'm barely hanging by a thread with this show.

The amount of PR that Oliver has done about Bucks storyline and Buddie has been overkill. To the point, where of Buddie doesn't happen after talking about it so much that headlines and clickbait have been created, they're going to look like they've just been shipbaiting to pull in the viewers!

Tommy and the homophobe/transphobe need to go. Lou's weird "thriving" video gives me the impression they're deffo not thriving! And the other one needs to go for obvious fucking reasons!

The whole Bi storyline would've been better coming from Eddie. They could've had Buck single and Eddie discovering himself like it was originally going to be. It would've been so much more interesting to watch!

But I do think the fact that the season only has 10 episodes has put a damper on things, too!

oh i agree with everything!!! it's definitely giving shipbait (for now) i feel like Oliver is saying unhinged Buddie stuff because, in his prospective, they can't really call him out for queerbaiting anymore, since Buck is canon bi now. But I really hope I'm wrong and that he actually knows that Buddie is endgame or something!

I'm still conflicted about Lou video to be honest, I'd rather if he wasn't there at all lmao but if he's there just to make things awkward and they are really NOT thriving then i Could be ok with it. for the Edy situation... idk how she even got in s7 to begin with, i know it's because Natalia actress wasn't available and Tim didn't want both of them to start off as single but they could have just went with a replacement and no one would have noticed 💀 big hope is that she will be bones before the season finale tho! No one likes her and the foreshadowing about them breaking up has been crazy (never date someone you met on a call, bobby convo etc)

Anon you have no idea I've been terrorizing my bestie about EddieTommy for WEEKS i still wouldn't like Tommy as a character but it would have made so much more sense and it would have been way more groundbreaking than BuckTommy! if episode 100 have zero haters I'm dead I REALLY HATE the whole execution and how they switched characters and keep making Buck and Eddie interchangeable cuz that will never be right and it will never sit well with me for various reasons (racism is the racism). And I've been wanting Buck to be single for the longest time let the man be alone and get to know himself for the love of God!

This season worst problem is that they are writing it as they go and they are really rushing things and you can really tell that they have no idea where the plot is going and the season being only 10 episodes make it so much worse :( hope season 8 will save us from this hell but if the last 5 episodes of the season don't get any better idk if i will survive to watch season 8 they are really making it hard for me and I've been watching the show since 2019!

Also i want to thank you for sending me your thoughts! I got so excited when i saw an ask in my inbox 🥰 this is a safe space for hating! I'm a yapper and a hater!!

#911 spoilers #911 on abc #buddie #anon ask #eddie diaz #evan buckley

25 notes · View notes

drivesystem · 3 days

Text

Tigers Prey

Warnings/kinda: degrading, harddomhongjoong, mentions of blood, names {whore, cumsleeve, cumtoy}

MINORS DNI.

Summary: y/n is known for being a trickster within their sector and ran into general Hongjoong, who started to get curious of them and ending up cornered him into a deal, but of course, it wouldn’t;t be this long if y/n won.

Word count: 11.7k words

This one is a very long one and I feel like i have missed a lot of things when it comes to warnings or tags and if so please to tell me and I will dit it and make sure everything is up to date. I wanted to make this long because I enjoy writing long and descriptive pieces of writing but I do get too off tracked and end up writing more then needed and feeling like I either started to rush or I was writing to much of a scene that I felt the need to hurry and get to the other scene before it was just more then needed to be or just less. But overall I hope you guys do enjoy it and want to read more while I try to figure out how to work tumblr and make my account fitting to my linking and reflective of my writing!

Who doesn’t love a little good menace in their sector every now and then hm? Someone who can make you laugh and feel slightly better about all of the situations that are happening around the place you have to call home, right? Well, welcome to sector 8, one of the furthest sectors from the dune empire. Where the most ruthless were known to be created here and if they ever got out of those crimson red walls it was over for everyone who was in their line of sight. During the day, it was said that the emperor would send out some generals to look over the sectors. Mainly just to come back with a daily report and see if anyone needed to be in prisoned for their actions or harsh statements against the royal house. Something not a lot of people would walk away without having a scar to tell the story, if they ever got t walk away at all. But since no one truly seems to mess with sector 8, their left alone to do as they pleased, slightly having a lot more fun than the others simply due to the fact that it takes a long time to get down here. Having to walk through the quiet yet busy streets of the first 3 sectors, then walking through sector five where all of the clothings are made by hand per request, it’s always so busy there no matter what time you go. Sector 6 is more so if hunting per says, where the spears and arrows are made, sometimes the Royal guards will come down there to get their own weapons made and crafted.

“Your getting old their old man! Come on we’re not even halfway through the sector yet!” His voice cheered as he ran with a small bag of treats. It was just some corn that he would hold over a fire in order to make popcorn at home. But that was it, something that only costed around 2 coins, 2 for a small bag and 4 for a large bag. The vendor was an old-time friend of y/n’s someone they could always joke with, and people would know it by now and never saw a problem with it. So why would anyone go out of their way in order to make it worse? “And you’re jumping around in order to move somewhere else!” The man yelled back in a Happy yet playfully annoyed the while watching y/n jump around on the dirt.

His smile was enough to make even the most stubborn of me and women smile and feel joyful. To lose that would be like losing the sun after so long of enjoying its warmth. But today was no regular day, there was no warning for it either so no one could prepare for this. But there was a. Dangerous jingle slowly getting closer to the sector, one that brought fear and made many people hold their heads down. And when the post watchers saw the man in the blood red kimono, they knew what they had to do in order to keep everyone safe. One of the smaller watchers had run to a bell, listening to the music be loud as people were banging on the drums and rang the bell, looking like it was part of the music before it was all slowly coming to a stop. Leaving the lively and busy streets to be quiet and with people holding their heads down and the large wooden gates slowly moved opened.

Showing the man with a scar over his left eye that had a whole story behind it. The tiger general, a man who looked short enough to be so king and cheerful, someone who would lend you a hand if you asked for it. Was someone who could cut you in two before you could ever begin to beg for help. His hair was was long silky black, it almost moved like water with each step he took. Being held high in a ponytail yet it still reached to his lower waist. His clothes were always clean without a speck of dust of them. Sewed to fight his body in a way that looked so tight, yet he was able to move with such ease and grace it didn’t look like a tiger but a swan. He didn’t have much of anything on him but his sword. They saw there was enough blood from his battles to make his own sword, making it the first sword made out of blood.

The sound of the bell had reached everywhere, making y/n’s smile fade before hiding with the corn vendor, yeosang. The two were around the same age. With yeosang only being a couple years older than y/n, but also more protective of him. Yeosang knew how scary the general could be and never wanted y/n to meet that fate. The vendor was towards the edge where the forest laid bare and untouched by many people. The wooden vendor looking beaten and old, but it did the job it needed to do and that was enough for yeosang. He made sure Y/N was hiding in a spot close to under it since he didn’t have a back side. There were a little hole people could hide if they weren’t supposed to be out. A spot yeosang dug up first before ever making his little vendor. “Yeosang…why- “y/n started, wanting to pout and whine before looking at the shush tester on yeosang face before letting the old rug cover up the hole underneath his feet. Everyone could hear the sound of his men behind him. The sound of the armor clanging together was enough to make everyone return back to their jobs lookin scared and worried.

“Now now why is everyone so tense? I was just hearing that amazing music and joy from back there.” The general started, showing a twisted little grin while looking at each vendor, seeing how everyone was more tensed. Shoulders were raised and they were more focused on their jobs then before. After all some had to skin the fish, some had to take out the bones, some had to peel the corn and peas, cleaning the shows and making the instruments to create such beautiful music that rang loud. But not loud enough for the royal court to hear from their home. People always used to say that the most innocent and colors are the most dangerous and poisonous to be around. One touch and smell and you’ll be dead before you can even realize it.

“Now now proud people of Dune, I won’t bite you... without a reason.” He stated, watching how some kids were staring at him, but their mothers and fathers were trying to hide them without looking fearful, some kids were still playing with a ball made out of bamboo in order to entertain themselves. “I’m just here for my daily check up, come now.” Watching his guards check the vendors, even the corn one but found nothing, just like always, right? Y/N was there, listening to his endless taunts that always had some remains of fear control with each step he took. Making a crunching sound that sounded like the bones he broke and grinned. “Sir, there is nothing strange here.” One of the guards' states, listening to the general do. A taunting clap, it was slow, yet hard and powerful. “Good for them, maybe they can get some of the leftovers too from the palace. Oh, they would love that now, wouldn’t they? He taunted, knowing that he would give them almost next to nothing. Not to be rude, but just to see who would take it in the most brutal way possible. Who was willing to kill for their next meal?

“Anyways, let’s get going, we still have people to check on, don’t we boys?” Laughing at the end of his sentence, he turned on his black heels before marching his way back home. Yeosang looked down and slowly helped y/n get out of the hole, dusting them off but still trying to keep them hidden. But the general could smell someone new here, someone who didn’t have that scent of fear but knew causing a scene was not his style, at least not in the denser sectors. But of course, what’s the fun in confronting them when everyone can see you, hear and even feel you? He has to do this in his own way, hiding his face so no one can see him and try to give up covers. But for now, he needed to head back, the tiger general simply walking back home. He preferred it more then getting on his horse and letting everyone just see him.

Plus, it helps him learn about people, he can read them better this way and even now. With those trying to hurry and get out of his way so his path is clear, he can see those with fear, lust and even excitement in their eyes. Something he grew used to after so long of being here with everyone, and having to learn about people in order to find out who’s who and what could they have possibly done in order to get on his radar in a bad way. “Yunho, when we get home, take me to San unless something happened to where the emperor needs me, alright?” looking over his shoulder with his head tilted back, looking up at the taller male.

Yunho was a man of few words when out in public, his posture was straight and stern with eyes that had no life in them. No color, no emotions in them whatsoever. His hair was kept long per the general's orders. It was kept in a long ponytail as well, the hair was always frizzy whenever he went out, some say it acts like a cat's fur or when all of the hairs stand up on your body and point to a direction. His lips were almost always in a line whenever he was out f the walls of his only home. His clothes were sewed by hand with a color as bright as the sun, with different colors like red, and a difficult orange color to get ahold of when the sheep were cold or there wasn’t enough to feed them. His sword was always kept within its obi sash. With a bright yellow tie on the handle of it. He was one of the very first that the general took in under his own rule when he was invading another kingdom years ago.

But returning back to y/n, they were sitting on the vendor table, flipping a golden coin while kicking their dirt covered feet. Watching yeosang close for the night. It was clear he was on edge, yet y/n was more so carefree, after all the generals didn’t see them so why should they be worried about him? “You’re getting yourself tensed up, it’s gonna give you away you know?” y/N started, trying to lighten the mood as they always try to do but it was clear that yeosang was more worried this Time. The guards were looking around so closely and intense that it was enough to shake him. If it was any other day he would be just fine, trying to joke around and see who can smile and just feel more relaxed as the sun started to set. “Y/N… he had Yunho with him, that alone is enough to make people want to bow to their knees and hope they don’t get dragged away for public humiliation.” Yeosang stated, letting out a stressful sigh, knowing y/n just wanted to make things better, less tense filled and more relaxed before anyone went to sleep. But it just wasn’t working.

“I know you mean well, I truly know that you do, and it makes me happy to see.” He started, looking over to his friend who had a bittersweet expression on their face, it was hard to remained positive when the threat was constantly looking at you in the eyes. With nothing more then blood lust in them in a way that would make anyone shake if they could, not even just shake but tremble even. Setting the copper coin on the table, y/n had jumped down since yeosang had blew out of the candle, it was one of the last ones on the street that was still lit. They still had to walk down the furthest side, the upper parts of the electors were for the shops and materials for those to see and to buy. The very back was where the living sections were. It was hard to be there when everyone was almost just stacked on top of each other, all squished in the three houses it took since there wasn’t enough wood t make more. Sure, they were surrounded by the forest, but if anyone were to cut from it without a Royal order, they were killed.

y/n would walk yeosang over to his bed since they were further apart, everyone had assigned beds and spaces and to switch or move without permission resulted in a slap on the back. “Get some rest and please, if you sneak out don’t you date go to far out understand? I keep hearing someone walk when I try hard enough and-“ “Yeosang you’re stressing yourself out and then you won’t be able to sleep an then you’ll be cranky in the morning before you get to close. I’ll be alright.” Yeosang could only look at his friend, something felt wrong, too wrong for him t comfortably be able to sit down and rest the way he needs to before the morning comes. Holding his blankets he watched y/n skip to the robe, since everyone was still resting or trying to fall asleep. But y/n is a night owl, why fall asleep this soon when there’s still time to kill?

Walking passed the last sector house, there stood nothing in their way. It wasn’t like they would go dar, they were simply just there, enjoying the cold and crispy air around them before taking another crunchy step forward into the think grass. The moon was covered by the clouds, yet it always made for one of the more exciting nights. Walking passed some of the taller trees, y/n was simply walking down the stone made path they made simply by leaving stone rocks so they could make their way back to the pot before it was too late, after all everyone needs to have their own little rest now, don’t they? It wouldn’t be any fun if he was just as tired as everyone else now, would it? There wasn’t much to swing from sadly and since it was dark there was no telling if anything or anyone was in the trees just watching them or if there were any traps still set by the guards. But that’s part of the thrill, isn’t it? Not knowing who or what’s out here and if anything could kill you or injure you in a way that it would take a while for anyone to see or hear you? Let alone find you. “Hm… I could’ve sworn the lake was as lot closer, why does it feel so far away now?”

Looking around and trying to listen the sounds of little water ripples, there was nothing close that could make any sound. There was only silence, too quiet. Yet there was just a pair of eyes that burned like a predator watching their prey in the dark night. Watching how helpless they look, knowing that there’s something, just someone there watching them and their every move yet trying to find their predator was the hard part. Because where are they? Are they on the ground with them? In the trees watching them like a bird would. Maybe if y/n didn’t move then no one would be able to find them, right? After all, if you stay still, they’ll hav do to look for something else if you can hide good enough, right?

This was making the person smirk watching y/n look around, it was like the moon was out and this person could see every move y/n was making. How their shirt hair was moving around in a slightly frantic manner, their eyes darting around while they simply just stood there in their torn up and dirt covered clothes. It wasn’t that far, but y/n had to get back, and so they started to walk before it turned into a jog. There was someone moving after them, making quick running sounds to sound like a tiger chasing their prey finally after waiting for what felt like hours. But just before Y/N could make it, seeing yeosang holding up a candle to try and bring them over, yeosang’s eyes filled with horror after seeing who was behind y/n/ But he couldn’t scream. Because just as y/n was tackled to the hard ground, his mouth being covered by a cloth and his body being held and squished by someone else. Someone had covered yeosang’s mouth, letting the candle fall onto the ground before they stomped on the ground. The only sounds were their muffled struggles and muffled cries as the two struggled to get free from their captors. Who could they be? Who could be here this late just waiting for something horrible to happen? For the time to strike and take them away.

Y/N was lifted up over a shoulder, his legs were tired and so were his arms, but yeosang was freer. “Try to fight and your friend will get hurt too, understand?” The guard said in yeosang’s ear, feeling the wet tears fall on his hand before yeosang quickly nodded his head, being dragged along the sides of the crimson red walls. Yeosang was panicking, he couldn’t see but this man sounded cold and serious and whoever had y/n was more ahead while he could see his body thrashing around. It was a sight he never wanted to see in his life. But why was he taken? Why wasn’t he just threatened to keep his mouth shut or he would be killed in front of y/n as a punishment for them to understand.

“Please…Please what is-“ “You wait. To speak.” The guard said, making his grip tighter around yeosang before they were walking through more sectors. People were asleep and even then, those who were awake were keeping their eyes closed. Yeosang could only whimper in the painful way, feeling his side while his lungs gasp for air. But y/n is stubborn and refuses to go without a fight, this isn’t the first time they’ve been tied up, but they can get out. It just takes time and trying to not alter the man, it could only be one, but y/n is willing to take chances, after all why give up so early and easily when there’s so much more fun to have? By the time had reached sector 4, y/n had managed to break free before jumping on the sides to jump on the wall, getting on top before looking down with adrenaline and fear in hi eyes. He looked down to see the general, with a burning passion in his eyes that would make even the scariest kids sit down and never look him in the eyes again.

The look was screaming murder, but his grin was showing interest. But he also saw yeosang under the circle shaped lantern. He was scared but he was also being dragged by a guard. Someone who was more buff then the actual general himself. His eyes were filled with tears while his body was shaking. The guard had very short hair, he was new and was able to keep his hair as short or long as he wanted to until he’s been with the general for a year, then he would have to keep it long and learn to fight with it. The guard's eyes were filled with something unlike the others. He was trying to make his eyes stone cold like the others he’s around, but it wasn’t guilt in his eyes either. His clothes were black, they had to be the training clothes that most of them had to wear. But it wasn’t the time to be staring. Yeosang was trying to shake his head, telling y/n not to do this, it’ll only make things worse for the two of them and that’s something he didn’t want for him. “Take your choice home, I get to have some fun it seems. If tell the emperor I’m playing with my prey.” He said, watching the guard not before having to throw yeosang over his shoulder before walking back.

Yeosang wanted to scream, telling y/n to stop but the grip only made him gasp for air in pain before y/n started to run along the walls. Listening to the sounds of the general getting faster and faster, but so was he. If he kept going, he would be caught in no time, having to struggling more against someone who would make it harder to move and harder to do anything in that way. So just before the arms wrapped around y/n, he had jumped down into the water. The running was fast, but it was also said to do so, by the time the general had climbed up on the wall he was already running. It was tiring but the adrenaline was pushing them through. Staying in the water and trying to hide the water bubbles, it was too dark in the night to see anyone or anything, but they needed to go. “Smart move to be under the water. I can’t see you since this water is still murky.” The general teased, walking around some before jumping down t the shallow end, slowly moving his shoes while listening and looking around.

“But someone as such as you aren’t ready for water like this. It burns your eyes awhile your lungs just…scream for air. Yet if you come up too fast for air the water will give it away before your gasp for air. You’re at a loss here, little cub.” He taunted, letting himself have a nice chuckle before walking around more, almost disappearing while walking in the water, not even making a sound. y/n’s eyes were burning, they were floating but couldn’t come out for water, not without giving up, but they were close. Feeling the dirt get closer before slowly crawling out. There weren’t any sounds coming from the water, not a drop, not a little trickle before taking off in the woods. He had to leave yeosang even If he never wanted to. But there was not getting caught today, not now and not ever. Running through the woods, yet then finally hearing the faint sounds of someone running after them. It was almost in a taunting type of way, chasing directions ever so slightly in a way that was to throw y/n off before they were tripped over a rock.

Rolling down the hill before hitting a tree, letting out a painful cry of pain before slowly opening his eyes only to see the general standing above them, not even out of breath or tired to say the slightest. If anything, all he did was a simple head tilt before crossing his arms. “I enjoy these types of people. You know how to make it fun, you almost got away from me, twice.” HE started, watching y/n try to move away, but where could they go? “Tell you what, little cub, since it’s clear you’ll just keep trying to run and get away from this, why not make a deal with me, hm?” He started, leaning down closely but not so far as to where they would tip over the edge and fall over to join them, but even then, the general is a gentleman, he sticks to his word. “Why in the hell would I trust you! You took away yeosang who literally has never done anything wrong in his own life!” y/n yelled, watching the man let out a little chuckle that sounded like a man who’s lost his own mind only to have rebuild it again.

“Well, yeosang was wanted by someone for a while but he won’t be hurt, not by hand that is. Now back to you, stalling will just make me change my mind ruin you in ways n one would live through.” He stated, softly titling his head to the side some before holding up one hand. “If you could make it back to the sector within 2 days, it would’ve been three if you waited. Then you will be let off and able to visit yeosang as you please. But if I catch you before then, you have to come with me with no fights. You’ll be my bride.” He finished, he could see the horror written all over his face, either one sounds horrible, but what would be the point if y/n was caught? Being stuck in a room like a dog waiting for someone to come and feed them water? “If I win, I get to see yeosang and the sector gets treated better!” “Say that and I’ll make it one more day when the sun rises. Do we have a deal?”

It took a while before y/n could respond, it was obvious anything but a yes or a no would lead to less time, soon y/n wouldn’t have much of a choice in the matter. “One…Two…” hearing that countdown made y/n start to run, stumbling some while getting further away, only taking a left turn to hopefully throw him off, after all he still needed to get somewhere safe to rest. He only has about one day, but even then, so much can happen during that time. And that’s something the general was hoping for. After all who doesn’t enjoy a good game of cat and mouse. Running as fast as they could for a a while it was clear how far they were from home. The woods were denser, yet it was still quiet, but the sun was rising. There’s no way it could already be daytime this quick right? It was just dark, and everyone was resting!

But the day was hard, it was like every move was the last before getting caught by the general. From walking further to the trees to trying quiet, slowly moving around to find some water. Y/N was out of breath and tired, you could see some scars from falls and some bruises from the falls and crumbles, with the hopes that the general didn’t find him. But he still had to make it home, make it before anyone else could find him and take him a way. He knew the way, he just needed to turn around and make a run for it. That’s all he needed to do, and he was free from this mans twisted game. So, there he was, trying the withering piece of cloth around his waist before running through t he tall grass. Knowing he was close to home, he had to be right? He didn’t go that far like he thought he did.

His feet were burning from bleeding and all the rocks and sticks that poked him, his lungs were burning, and his stomach was growling so loud it felt like he was giving himself away it the man who was never too far but also never too close. The sky was still bright like it was just early morning, it felt like forever when not being home, not messing around with everyone and not even being with his best friend, it all was coming to and end and hopefully y/n was winning. But they couldn’t make too much noise when running, but one thing they weren’t used to, was the weight if everything crashing on them. “No…No please… I’m almost there…”

Y/N gasped, seeing everything get blurry and dizzy but he could see the sector. Where the guards were waiting and so was yeosang, who looked fearful yet almost broken. He was shaking as he saw his friend trying to emerge from the forest, but they were losing. “No…. Y/N YOUR THERE! BEHIND YOU!” He cried out before feeling the hand on his shoulders squeeze them harshly. Ignoring the people watching them since no one was allowed to help him get free, he had to get there before the general did. But he failed, and the last thing he saw was yeosang fall to his knees in pain before everything around him went dark. His body hitting the itchy grass while his feet were covered in more blood while everyone was watching. Hopping Y/N would get up and give out one last push, but there he was.

Walking behind y/n wit his hands behind his back yet that same large grin on his face while swaying side to side in a teasing way. “Oh, so close yet so far, it’s hard to run when your feet are bleeding oh that’s not good for your friend now is it, yeosang kang. Or should we change it to Choi?” The general taunted, picking up y/n like they weighed nothing and kept walking closer to the guards, all of them being men he has trained himself, all six of them. He was humming while rubbing y/n’s back in a slow manner, almost like he was waiting to dig his claws into it and tear into some of the flesh just to leave the perfect kind of marking. “After a deal is a deal and when they wake. They will be in my chambers, and I will be there to watch him. You, however, have your studies to attend to, Choi.” The general let out a twisted little chuckle once again before walking through the old village. Watching people hang their heads down with their hairs hiding their faces.

They lost two people today, one of them being someone who caused them laughter and someone who was either shy or sassy, sometimes even both. The youngest guard was holding yeosang’s hand and making them walk besides him. No one could look, but only in that sector. Once they made it passed the others of course people were staring, after all they started to think he had caught two criminals, and they were being taken a way from their sentencing. Which would be the case if the general wasn’t so interested. “Please… his feet are turning blue...” Yeosang whispered as they made it to the second sector. “Jong-ho did the little kang say something” The general asked, titling his head over while walking up the stairs leading to the crimson red doors. Jong-ho, the youngest general had looked over to yeosang, watching the older man trying to keep his shoulders high but it was hard when the stare was so…empty yet dark. Maybe it was only an act around the others, right?

“I’m not sure, did you?” he asked, looking down to the older male. “The more we stand here the more he’ll bleed, now we can’t have that now, can we?” The general was enjoying his taunts, seeing the look of fear, confusion and anger written all over yeosang’s face before walking up the stairs, allowing some of the blood to trickle down to the stairs before reaching the tall red doors. There were so many gold dots on the doors in order to make every animal that each of the 7 generals presented with the dragon above them, symbolizing the emperor. Watching the doors slowly open, the general walked inside before looking in the red eyes of the emperor. The emperor of the lakes, and the blood that runs in them. Seonghwa Park. He stood there close to the entrance, the sun slightly lighting up his honey tanned skin along with his long purple hair that seemed to only get longer as the years went. They saw so much blood was spilled on his eyes during all of the fights. His clothes were always the best, of course. A rare blue made from the closest sector, with white clothes and his favorite light blue robe to make him stand out.

“I see you’ve finally returned, Hongjoong. Nurse, attend to the…” “Bride or cup, emperor park.” Hongjoong, the general answered while letting the silent nurse slowly take the man and quickly walk over to the emergency med tent. Leaving the men to their own conversation while yeosang kept his head down, after all without permission. He wasn’t allowed to look at the powerful man in front of him, he could only listen to his chilling, yet soothing voice speak through the walls around them. “Clearly their a bride. You never play with your pretty this badly unless you want them alive under your terror.” The emperor said, watching Hongjoong walk closer to him till they were walking side by side with jong-ho tailing along, waiting for his dismissal. “Why of course, someone the people are willing to hide from me? How could I grow curious of a feisty cub who thought running form me was the smart answer?” he questioned, watching the older man smirk in approval.

“I taught you well it seems, now what about little jog-ho? You let him keep a prize?” “Oh, you know, he grew curious to know who was hiding them and had a feeling the little corn stand was a little more…loose then the others and decided to ask me a question. If he was right about the stand, he could keep the owner, and if he was wrong, I was free to punish him. Good thing he was right, hm?” Jong-ho could only nod his head in agreement, something yeosang never knew about. He was a target from the start of it all whenever they had their last visit, which was around months ago, and even when he thought he was being careful he was wrong. Maybe it’s true that none of them are human or yeosang wasn’t as smart as he thought he was. Yeosang could only look over before they stopped walking, they were inside the locked doors of the red palace, or blood palace as most call it out of the ears of those inside.

The infamous red color was everywhere, with each hall being dedicated to each member, with the largest being only for the emperor, of course. Leading to his main house where his living quarters where along with any concubine he picked. Both male and females, no one was safe from his eyes once he picked you. Hongjoong was next to his, somewhat, the tiger was painted above the hallway with eyes brighter than his own. “Jong-ho, you’re dismissed. Hongjoong, the boy has been taken to your room, you’re lucky they aren’t sick.” Hongjoong gave a deep bow before walking down the dark hallway, enjoying his to be dark and barely lit before entering his room. It was a grand room for anyone to be able to enter with his rather large circular bed in the middle.

The sheets were as white as snow, opposite of how he is rather with red covers and pillow covers to match it. After all, like this he could hear everything from every corner that there was around him. It was easier this way sine it also never messed with the wooden floors he had. To the right was a door to his bathroom that was slightly opened, he had given his maids permission to clean him, well the butlers rather. He never let the girls see what was his to see under all of those clothes. After all, why would they? His bathroom was almost as large as his own room. With a matching ceiling and floor to his own room. The tub was sunken into the floor with buckets there to let out all of the water and simply use it for the plants within the garden, after all water can never truly be wasted if someone is careful enough. There mirror was slightly large in frame, but it was there, along with wooden carved cabinets with the freshest towels for cleaning and for drying. In the hot filled water was y/n, still asleep but getting cleaned in ways he never was before.

His hair was even cleaned and picked of anything that was still left in there, like bugs, dirt, any lice if possible. He was getting scrubbed so hard anyone would find it uncomfortable, but it needed to be done, the water itself was so dirty but there was progress being made. Even his teeth were being brushed yet he was still asleep, it was estimated h would be asleep for a couple of hours, enough for everyone to get things done without a fight and having to witness the brutality of the general, something no one liked to have dealt with anymore. “We’ve cleaned him as best as we could general, this will help with his recovery.” One of the butlers said, looking over to the general's feet while scrubbing y/n back still, hearing his slow claps of approval which made everyone slow down. “Wrap him in a towel and let me dry and dress him. Afterwards someone will take his measurements and make the clothes for him, along with the dress, he will be wedded to me within this week or the next, whenever the dress is done and the flowers are ready, understood?” He said titling his head to the side and watching everyone nod while doing their request fast and the way he liked.

Soon y/n was back in his arms, still limp like a rag doll, but they were alone once more with no one to hear them, or really no one to stop them. Hongjoong was gentle with the drying part, caressing every body part and making sure it was all dry before getting them dressed in a rather large shirt, it was all he had. Letting the male rest on the round bed while he simply stared at him. To think someone like this had caught his eye after so long of not being interested in anyone, no matter who tried wit their own creative way no one was able to. Yet here he is, looking over his prey like it was too perfect to eat, but not perfect enough to spare the torture.

“So... I had lost the bet then, haven’t I?” Y/N asked one of the maids, watching them take the measurements as needed before slowly nodding her head. It was all she could say, after all what could she do? Hongjoong had ears and was on the move, listening to every word somehow being spilled among people in ways some would say is the world of a demon. “He brought you here 2 days ago to be exact.” “Two days ago? I was out that’s long?” “Your body was extremely weak due to all of the sudden movements and possible high nerves and tension. You never had the time to rest and calm down the way you needed to, when you passed out it was the only way your body was able to recover from the stress and fear of it all. Now, what color would you like the dress?” She held up a wooden board with the strings attached to it all stretched out, not giving y/n much time to recover from the shock of it all.

It was clear she had to hurry, not because she was scared but because she knew that the general would send her out if she wasn’t fast enough to get the information she needed. She had all the measurements, all the numbers needed and now she just needed the color. Which wasn’t much there could be made with the little amount of time. “Does it truly matter what color it is? Won’t he just make it a different one?” “He said this is among the few things you have control over sir. The ones on here are the ones we have enough to make the dress with.” There was blue, red, gold and purple, white was used too much for some weddings if possible and Hongjoong wasn’t going to allow such a basic color, he needed something bold, something fierce and show to show his own marking without even tainting the actual body. “Then I guess… purple will do.” y/N answered, trying to swallow the pride in his own throat while standing tall.

He lost the bet fair and square and even then, this is the home of the emperor, running away would end in death before anything could get out of those walls alive, even with a limb attached correctly still. The maid simply bowed before holding her items and leaving the room, allowing y/n to look around at the place. The windows were always uncovered to show the sky and the moon when it rose, along with the best view of the garden, well one of the best views of the garden. There was a wooden stand with Hongjoong armor on it with one of his many swords attached to it. The closet was small since he never wore much, but he had one made for y/n to be another large extension since he had an extra room, he never saw the purpose of.

“Ah, I see you’ve accepted the deal terms and didn’t put a fight. Good, good, little Choi was so worried about you. It almost made me pity you.” Hearing that voice was like a low roar brushing against someone’s ear before realizing who it was. The two met eyes and it was like a wave of dread washed over the room with y/n trying to remain unafraid, something that would only unfold in ways he never knew were possible. “A deal is a deal and I lost fair and square, what could I have done to make a difference?” “Steal a pair of shoes.” He added, walking into the room and allowing the doors to close with a loud bang as always. Watching y/n try so hard to be brave in front of him, like it will make a difference in it all. “I don’t steal from other sectors. I would’ve been taken much too early.” “And we would’ve had this part over with, don’t you think?”

His smirk was annoying, taunting at the most with a pleasure for this, he could see the anger trying to boil out, the rage of a cub trying to take on the bigger tiger to make a stand, but the cub knew better then to do so. It would mean death without fail. Hongjoong had walked closer, talking long strides over while watching y/n’s shoulders only get tenser and tender with each passing step. Till he was at their level, trying not to flinch as the general pushed some of the hair away from their eyes to be able to stare more directly into y/n’s eyes. “You have a sharp t tongue, something that can be toned to make people listen. But you don’t know when to let the venom sink in, you get too heated and tense, it’s almost like teasing a predator with their food. You give in too easily.” Hongjoong said, in a tone that was almost caring and gentle, something no one hears in public.

“But, as my partner, you’ll be able to learn when to let the drops of poison fall into the preys hands and watch them fight to survive. After all, you hav to learn how to survive me. And that’s never easy. Don’t you agree?” His eyes showed interest for once, but it was twisted, his hand was slowly wrapping around y/n’s neck and squeezing it, not enough to choke him but enough to make him gasp for air while still having a smaller airway to it. “I’ll break you so perfectly no one can put you back together, not even Choi can. You’re mine to ruin, mine to paint and mine to do as I please till, I know you’re ready. You’ll learn just like your friend will have to.”

“You’re insane general. You’re so twisted you think this will make me break? I will never.” Y/N spat back, trying to seem like he had some kind of control of the situation, but it was working, it will never work against someone like this. “Oh, but you already have my dear, you’re trying to get the high ground from me, trying to dig those baby fangs into my neck and let out venom but it’s nothing more then a tingle, a little feeling that fades away. Let me teach you.” He mentioned in a tone that no one could ever be certain was genuine, like eh would actually teach him how to be like him. Like yn would ever allow themselves to ever sink down to their level in such a way. “Now that your awake and well, we can finally start to plan things, who knows maybe even little yeosang can finally see you after having to wait so long to make sure you’re safe and sound, somewhat.”

“Y/N…” slowly turning around the two finally met after what felt like a week durning this time. Y/N was standing outside of the red gates, the look in their eyes was a mixture of dim bravery yet defeat at the same time. Wearing a simply red dressed stitched with gold jewels and bells that rang with each movement, the dress was made to fit and hug yeosang’s every curse and highlight every part that was visible for the public eyes to see, even yeosang’s birthmark under his right eye was shown for those to see but not to touch with their own hands. He was the only person allowed to visit y/n before the start of the wedding. This was the first time the two of them were meeting after so long of not ever being able to see each other due the situation. Y/N’s tired eyes reached yeosang’s own tired eyes. The bags were slightly hidden due to the blush and makeup from everywhere else. The dress was the color they requested, knitted by hand with purple with golden beads sewed into it, the front and back parts had traces of tiger claws in the designs with the gold shoulder pieces.

“We can run ourselves out of this situation, can we yeosang.” Y/N asked, seeing the look on his face answer the whole question without having to say a single word. “Y/N… of course we can’t. This isn’t out territory anymore. This is something not even I can help hide you from.” With hints of soft crackles in his voice, yeosang could only give you an air hug, since touching would mess with the dress and the jewels, and there is almost no time to fix them the way it needed to be fixed. “I have permission to walk and give you away, since we don’t have parents. But, it’s time to go. I hear the drums.” Yeosang stated, watching y/m slowly stand up straight and take a deep breath while facing the doors, watching them slowly open to revel a handful of people, the entire open yard was filled with people. Each section had a few people from every sector to witness this, and those from their sector were closer to the stairs, watching the two of them slowly walk closer and closer to the stairs.

Where jong-ho was waiting to walk the pair of them up further. The outfit Jongho wore was still black from the last time the two of them met. Since he still had to earn his own claws before getting his own suit of his choice. But he had his sword in its oba sha, tied with the golden thread before standing to the side, he had to walk behind the pair before he was allowed to do anything else for that manner. Each step was like a cracking echo within the silence that could never be drowned out no matter how many screams were heard trying to cover it. The only other sound was the drums and calls of a singer. Hongjoong had a grin no one could wipe of his face. Wearing a mixture of blue and red to match, showing the swirls of the colors that were chosen.

“Brave and prideful like a swan, yet as colorful as a poisonous creature, it’s beautiful.” With his infamous head tilt, he was enjoying this, letting his touch burn like fire while standing before those who can’t do anything about it knowing it would lead to their deaths within the hour, not even within the hour but within the seconds, no hesitation. Just a swift and quick execution for everyone to see. The vows were simply, after all, all they had to do was repeat after the emperor before it was time for the celebration between the two of them with a promise of yeosang and jongho maybe being the next ones to be wed, after a longer time period of course. Allowing the pair to be newlyweds just for a while longer and allow everyone to witness the transformation of someone they wanted to protect slowly turn into someone who grew claws and developed a taste for venom.

The celebration was grand with some trying to enjoy it, dancing to the music and quietly enjoying the food around them enough to try it forget why this was even happening within the first place. Yeosang and y/n were able to sneak away, not outside but just a place for themselves and not feeling the dead eyes of the ones who caught them in the first place. “You know, for a bastard that enjoys taunting he knows some good food choices for this.” Y/N mentioned while try eat the chicken, yeosang wanting to smack them but knew it was not the place to do so. Can’t have any watchful eyes trying to ruin their fun already. “What- you love chicken try it. I’m surprised you’re not trying to steal my piece of chicken just yet.” Yeosang could only roll his eyes before trying to take a bite. Letting the soft crunch ring in his mouth before giving y/n a light smack on the back, letting the two of them chuckle like before whenever they were teases to each other.

“I hate that you’re right and that you know I like chicken this much. You still owe me a piece of yours I hope you know that.” “Hey, you waited to late it’s almost gone!” “And I’m older than you let me have a piece!” The two kept trying not to laugh so much, this was one of the only ways they could still hav fun with each other and not feel like one of the others is slowly going insane without the other. It was hard to hide given their attire but if they could get the chance then why waste it? They needed up sharing some of the food with each other. Hanging over whatever piece of chicken had ripped off the bone and gave it to each other. “Gonna tell me if mister bear cub is vicious as he’s trying to live up to?” Curiously was getting the better of him. After all, everywhere he went, yeosang was following after and almost looked ashamed of it,

But it was like a secret, watching yeosang look around to see If either of them was around or looking for the two of them before speaking in a low voice. “You wouldn’t believe me when I tell you he doesn’t even allow himself to sleep in the same bed as me, let alone actually facing me whenever the maids get me dressed, he never looks if I don’t say anything. He still doesn’t!” it was like watching a pair of friends gossip and giggle about a crush that one of them have on someone. But of course, since yeosang doesn’t know what is true or what is an act is going to be fearful of what could happen within the walls between the two but of course this was still leaving y/n to be alone with someone who could tear them in two without any recourse whatsoever and still enjoy the screams of mercy and for help around him.

“Mister Choi and Mister Kim, the generals are waiting for you, it’s time to go.” One of the guards said, one that neither of them had much of a pleasure to meet, Choi San. Some believe that he was the older brother of jongho before learning that the two are actually from different families and different sectors. San being form sector 6, and jongho being from 5. Both with very different experiences when it came to certain things around them, but it was still fun to mess with people in public sometimes. SAN’s choice of clothes was different form most, he was known for wearing nothing more then a long black coat, showing off the ink markings he had written all over his body, not entirely but still enough to show. His chin was sharp, some say it was sharp enough to break a sword before it could kill him and that twisted look of pleasure in his dark brown eyes were strong enough for everyone to see and enjoy better then most.

“And who are you, exactly?” It slipped out of yn’s mouth, raising an eyebrow simply out of habit, watching a smirk appear on san’s face before standing up strength. “General of the west Choi San, some say I’m the shadow general. Now we can’t keep the bride and jongho waiting now, can we? You still have a duty to fulfill tonight, and he doesn’t like to wait much longer for it.” He answered, enjoying the realization hitting their faces at once leaning who they were talking to. Yeosang looking more embarrassed and looking away while standing up while San shook his head. “Now now don’t be embarrassed you two haven’t met me before. I was out of the walls and sending a message to one of the uprising empires, making sure they know who not to mess with, don’t you agree?” He still ha the smirk on his face before walking the two over to their respected partners. San didn’t have anyone to be with before bowing at the two of them and leaving, going to enjoy more drinks.

“How do you always manage to get the attention from those in stronger power when you’re being sassy?” Yeosang whispered, trying not to laugh when seeing y/n’’s face, the look of his lips and the look in his eyes, making yeosang look away while trying to make sure that nothing else was going to happen here. But it was safe for now. After all the two of them had made it to their parents and were able to stand there, feeling somewhat less tense since everyone was still here, giving a false sense of sec I try. “Now what has you grinning so much San? Already having fun with your drinks of choice?” Hongjoong asked, crossing his arms while San hummed, walking over to grab another drink of juice while shrugging his shoulders, making yn start to make another face while yeosang was trying to pinch their back. It was like two classmates looking at each other and trying not to laugh at something when the teacher is being serious about something.

“Just enjoying the night, after all we all know how the tonight will end with you two and to be quite fair, captain. I rather not be hearing that when trying to rest, we all I know it’s going to be a long while before any of us a can get some rest. Well, of course the emperor will be able to rest like nothing is happening, but the others aren’t a s lucky.” Hongjoong gaze slowly turned over to y/m who was trying to remain serious and not giving up. But their face was slowly turning into something when hearing how the night will go. It was the realization back to the real world and the current time. Once those two get into that room and their clothes are off there will be no resting for a while, only the sounds of the two newlyweds. “Goodnight captain, mister Kim.” San had given each of them their respected bows before Hongjoong slowly held y/n’s waist, guiding them back up the stairs to their own shared hallway that was soon to be changed to symbolize the two of them, and no longer just one being the general.

“You seemed to have enjoyed your time with yeosang, we couldn’t find you two for a while, I thought you tried to run again, dishonoring the deal now, were you?” It was a taunt, but also and honest question. After all the two of them were supposed to enjoy a dance before spilling, but as soon as Hongjoong let him go, y/n was nowhere to be seen. It wasn’t until he sent San to go and find the two that they were able to find them. Seeing them smiling and trying to hide more facial expressions with their friend yeosang but other then that, there was nothing that the two of them were doing. “I am a lot of things, but I can honor a deal. Besides, all we did was sit together and talk.” “What about, hm?” Opening the door, Hongjoong walked them walk in and instantly be surrounded by the butlers who helped y/n get dressed slowly start to undress his bride in front of him. Slowly starting with the jewels and hairpins before just slowly going down to the ears, the neck, the wrist, the waist and the ankles. Before very carefully and slowly raking off the dress. It was weird to y/n. He wasn’t allowed to wear a suit which is something he was used to and even envisioned for his own special day. But it was today where he was in a dress instead, something he was able to pull off better than he ever thought he could.

“Why does it matter to you? Need something to tear into my before you make me unable to leave this room?” Y/N was trying to be his old self while the dress was slowly being removed to revel what was under, which was just a loose white shirt with white jeans. It was a lot to have under something so delicately made but it also needed to be taken care of. It seemed those couple of days leading up to know was wearing off on them, or y/n was prepared for what was about to come, Turing over to see that Hongjoong was getting undress while the others were closing the windows. Locking them tight before leaving with the clothes, simply leaving them by themselves before the door was locked for the outside. All it took was that slight head tilt from the general, showing his sharp teeth with a wicked grin.

“Now now where’s that mouth now? You were so busy being sassy that you forgot your place? You’re my fucking cumsleeve from now on and I will fuck and fill every hole you have.” Hongjoong groaned out, keeping one of his hands tight on y/n hair while bucking his hips with no mercy. Looking down and seeing the tears building up in the males' eyes while he struggled to breathe. Gagging with each movement with sloppy sounds being muffled Because of the length that was inside of his mouth. Hongjoong was not small, despite his height and he wasn’t thin either. He was long, and he was thick. All he could listen to be the gags and muffled cries of the male below him before deciding it was time to yank the male's hair back. Listening to the gasp for airs from the male, the coughing and the cries along with the spit coming down their Jaw. His body was bare with no clothes whatsoever, they were thrown close to the door and would be left there. His shoulders and neck were almost covered in purple and red marks with some teeth marks here and there scattered across their shaking body.

Their eyes were getting red and filled with tears, were they tears of pain? Tears of pleasure? No one would know, because Hongjoong had pushed his dick right back inside of y/n’s sore and swollen mouth. He was redder than a cherry, at least his length was, his face was dripping with sweat, not a lot but it was getting there. His eyes were filled with lust and hunger and the smirk on his face was filled with pleasure. But of course, he wasn’t going to end the night here, no he wasn’t even letting himself release the way he wanted to. “Use your fucking hands you. I want to hear you gasping for hair while trying to breathe.” Yanking them back off and watching them get to work. Y/n used both their hands and was quick to jerk off Hongjoong, watching the burning red tip twitch while their face was covered in tears while they were panting simply trying to breathe before their eyes were closed, feeling the white strings jump t their face and hearing the loud groans.

“Please…Fuck…Please.” Y/N whispered not caring if Hongjoong could before just sucking on the tip of it, jerking off the rest with their eyes closed and broken moans while feeling Hongjoongs hands run through their hair before pulling them back on his lap. Watching them gasp and look down before leaning their head up t let Hongjoong suck on their neck, leaving more purple hickey’s. His hands were being rough while squeezing whatever he could grab while listening to the moans coming from above. It was like watching the yarn come undone from someone using it to sew something.

Y/N’s hops were moving on his own above the tip, pulling his neck away and looking down at the man. His eyes being filled with pleasure and want, meeting Hongjoong’s eyes filled with hunger and desire. “Oh? You want to be used little fucktoy? Is that all you can think of now is my dick inside of there with no prep? No nothing but my dick going inside of your tight fucking hole?” Hongjoong started, watching y/n quickly move their head but knew that he needed permission, and if he rushed he wasn’t getting it. “Then beg for it. Let me hear you crumble for it and you’ll be used the way you it.” It was the last push he wanted to give, something to hear y/n say before he was going to fully make them not only be a dangerous person but also someone who crumbles under his touch whenever they want, and wherever he wanted to have it.

“Sir please…please use this fucktoy that you clearly wanted so bad that you were willing to chase for. Fuck I’m so empty I just want to fill it- oh fuck sir!” Y/n cried, shaking more whilst being thrown on the bed, their head being forced down into the sweat covered sheets, his hips were being held up in the air before he felt the pain of something going inside of their ass. The look in their eyes, it was like watching their eyes go cross eyed while their knuckles were turning white while their head was being forced up by the man behind him, listening to the sound of their hips slapping against each other while hongjoongs groans were as loud as y/n’s moans pleads. “Gods if I could you pregnant I’d have so many children the others would have to prey me off of you and even then I will fill you up till I’m done. Understand me?” Hongjoong said, feeling his release come but his hips never stopped, even when he watched y/n’s body was crumbling and shaking more, trembling so much and yet the liquid was being spilled onto the sheets and close to the floor.

It was a beautiful sight that no one could ever see, capture of even mention and it made Hongjoong simply give a sloppy kiss to him. Their tongues were being entangled into each other with drool coming down their chins with the sweat being stuck to each other, letting the slapping sounds get louder, letting the thrust get faster and harder. Leaving y/n’s bum only to get redder and redder before the pair ended up coming undone once against. Both of their body’s shaking against each other before Hongjoong leaned up straight and watched some of the juices slowly pour out before he slowly pulled out, watching the rest slowly come out while y/n was twitching. His eyes were closed yet his tired and shaking hands was slowly keeping his ass apart.

“You got filled twice and you still want this dick?” Hongjoong answered, panting but pushing himself back inside before hearing the weak sound of a broken moan, pulling out and flipping y/n on their wet back before going back inside. Holding their legs by their thighs before folding them up to their shoulders. Making sure y/n was watching Hongjoong fucking them, watching their dick go inside and out with the wet sounds and some of the juices still going around while y/n was holding his ankles. Looking from the show before to the look in hongjoongs eyes, both of their eyes were filled wit lust and want before another wet and messy kiss was being taken place. It was driving them crazy before the two had released once again, but both of their bodies were tired, drained and not being able to even move. Y.N’s body had completely fallen against the bed while Hongjoong fell on top of him. The two of them were panting, covered in sweat and cum and wanting to rest. They can shower and clean up in the morning, but Hongjoong was still inside and ended up falling asleep just the way he was. After all, why would he leave this?

Extra:

The woods were quiet, nothing else was being heard and it was quiet anyone would’ve thought someone, or something had died, and this was the way of the forest to mourn the death of it. “You’re going well dear, but you need to keep your eyes dim, the more you have emotion in them, which gives you away.” Hongjoong answered, leaning against he trees while cutting an ample before hearing the sounds f the bushes rustling before looking back to see a bunny. Confused, but then looking up to see y/n kneeling down with a smile on his face. His clothes were black now, but they were still baggy, but it was comfortable and able to be silent better within the area. His hair was long to his waist, and it was still blacker than the night sky. Watching Hongjoong give a proud yet small smirk on his face before taking a bite of the apple, putting away his dagger before keeping his arms out. Watching y/n fall down into their arms and wrapping his leg around hongjoongs waist.

“I did it! I get to choose tonight’s feast, don’t I?” They asked, watching Hongjoong grieve a playful thinking look while carrying them back the walls. “Yes dear, you do. And no, it can’t be chicken just so you and yeosang can fight over the biggest piece.” Hongjoong added, watching y’n’s smile turn somewhat dark but still happy even. “Oh, don’t worried, it won’t only be fried chicken.” “Y/N Kim, I will fuck you against one of the tresses.” “Oh, that’s a treat!” Hongjoong only rolled his eyes before looking around, they were still far from the palace before giving y/n that look. Watching their eyes lit up before getting down and turning around, holding not a tree, their clothes were always made with a little cut in the back for Hongjoong to use whenever he saw fit. Hongjoong got closer and untied his ribbon some so his pants were slightly hanging down but enough for his length to pop out before pushing in from behind.

Watching Y/N’s eyes flutter close with a quiet moan leaving their mouth while listening to the soft sounds of their hips slapping, but it was also muffled because of the clothes. “Gods you're such a whore for my dick even out in the woods.” “You made me into the best cumsleeves you ever met now, didn’t you? Ooh, sir please just right there.” Biting their lip with their eyes still closed while Hongjoong smirked with a lip bite. The two of them were known for their sex drive, the two of them would even have little quickies like this before meetings and not caring if others heard or knew about it. “Fill me up the way you like!” The cried out a little louder before letting out a pleased sigh coming from the both of them. Feeling the cum slip inside and even trickling down y/n’s thighs before the two stood up. Smiling before enjoying a heated kiss, with only tongues being used while still trying to figure out what to eat.

#hongjoong #fantasy #seonghwa #ateez san #ateez smut #gayness #fanfic #ateez fanfic #ateez imagines #ateez scenarios #yeosang #prey #mxm smut #mxm romance

20 notes · View notes