Every morning I check my phone hoping for something. I don’t have anything to wait for. But I still do. And every morning it’s nothing there.
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Thinking about it today... Moody's "Constant Vigilance" state of mind is a very difficult one to live with.
And while in "Harry Potter" this unmerciful imperative was directed at the reality of war in the Wizarding World, the real world's current social atmosphere and the increasingly hostile interactions between people even without being in a state of war - religiously, ideologically, politically, sexually motivated - make my ears ring with Moody's "advice". No matter if it is a friend or a foe I must deal with, I feel that without being constantly on alert to watch out so that no one may hurt or harm me, withiut holding the steering wheel firmly in my hands, I will lose myself to others. The innocence of the early years of childhood and teenage years is definitely gone.
This is, if anything, one of the central points where I identify with Severus Snape (and hence hold on to this fandom, as an escape while not actually being one, since it reflects much of my inner reality). One doesn't have to walk the same path to understand how it feels to lose one's innocent outlook on life and others, to lose trust, to experience gut-wrenching failure to the extent of wishing one's own existence away, to know what it's like to be betrayed, and used and left behind. And still cling to some sort of hope or at least, redemption...
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Mfw skilled artists, writers, and creators in general get overshadowed by untalented people who's only talent is having good way with words and having a bunch of money to bribe people with
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there is something unique and deeply special about monkey d luffy as a protagonist. he’s overwhelmingly ADORED by the fandom. he’s consistently the most or at least top 3 most popular characters in the whole series. peoples takes about him are gushingly positive. and that’s… really uncommon.
a LOT of fandoms i’ve witnessed or been in have a tendency to favor characters other than the main character. especially in anime. the main characters are often written as a blank slate for readers/watchers to project onto, but that makes them not as interesting and so they don’t get the fan attention.
but luffy is so far from that. and he’s ALWAYS been this way. we love him so much. he’s the heart of the story and the heart of the fandom in every single way. and i think that speaks to how well-written he is as a character. he’s fun and charming and complex and interesting and he makes us laugh and cry and cheer and hope and love. he’s able to inspire so much joy in people, both in his world but also in this one. and i think that’s really special. i feel so grateful to have found this story that means so much to me, and i’m so grateful that luffy exists.
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[start id: a black and white drawing cropped from p.29 of the Usborne Guide to Computer and Video Games (1982). The image shows a chessboard with lights and mechanical arm built in.
Image caption reads: "The robot arm on this chess-board makes all the computer's moves, and removes your pieces when the computer captures them. If the computer loses the game, it flings its arm about, flashes its lights and shrieks." end id.]
I assumed this emotionally dysregulated chess robot was just a 1980s fever dream, but apparently it exists, and glories in the name of "The Novag Robot Adversary":
Quoth the gorgeously Web 1.0 (but still updating in 2023?!) Chess Computer UK:
The Novag Robot Adversary is the most iconic of chess computers. There are several reasons. Firstly, for a product of 1982, its startling futuristic appearance. Secondly the robot arm which in terms of robotic character, comparative speed and range of movement is extraordinary for a consumer product. Thirdly the variety of functions - including autoplay, automatic setting up of the pieces for a new game, trace and review, best move, sound, lights, printer support, and not forgetting the tantrums produced by the ‘emotions’ button which involve waving of the arm, flashing lights and noisy sound. These functions all contribute towards a very impressive and entertaining machine, which was outstanding when it was first sold, and has not been bettered since.
That page also has videos of the machine in action, including this heart-rending footage of it losing its shit:
I am inordinately happy to learn about this.
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"I am glad you are here with me.
Here at the end of all things…"
(lotr quote + romance dawn trio, yes i like to make myself cry ❤️🩹)
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spending all day watching our favourite movies together, losing track of time as we laugh and cry and cuddle.
the sun goes down but neither of us want to move, silence hanging as we absorb the last moments of comfort.
"can we do this again tomorrow?"
"you have work"
"not if you say yes..."
goofy grins light up the room, you quickly start searching for another of your favourite movies, i hold you tight just to make it difficult.
we dont say it, but we both feel it.
we cant stop feeling it.
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