#suicidality mention cw

[much-ado-about-whumping]

Help for when you’re having a rough time

(If you're looking for my old pinned post with my whump masterlists, you can find it here.)

In light of some deeply sad news in the whump community today, I’m thinking about how many of us here struggle with mental health, sometimes including physical or mental self-harm and suicidality. Since I know lots of folks might be having a hard time right now, I wanted to share some resources that have helped me in rough moments. Please feel free to add on to this post (or make your own, if you want!) with the resources that have worked for you. 

First, a note:

Trauma, shame, and suicidality all tend to isolate - they make us feel like we’re all alone in the world, like no one else would understand us, and like the only solutions we have available to us are ones we can think of all by ourselves. In my experience, the antidote to that is connection. If you’re feeling scared or alone, you can hop into my asks or DMs if you want. I’m sure there are other folks in this community who would offer that, too. Many of us have grappled with mental health struggles, including suicidal ideation, and sometimes we can offer each other the care that can be hard to offer ourselves. Don’t be afraid to reach out if you need support.

A quick note about location: I live in the US, but about half the resources in this post are written guides you can access from anywhere. The hotlines and warmlines linked below are US-based. One or two are accessible in Canada or have an online chat or moderated forum that could be accessed anywhere. If you have good local resources from another place, please reblog and add them! (Thank you, @straight-to-the-pain, for flagging this in the notes!)

That said, here’s my absolute first recommendation if you’re feeling generally awful and don’t know what to do:

1. You Feel Like Shit (also available at its original site here)

If you’ve read a lot of ~self care tips~ in your life (and if you’re a bit of a salty bitch like me), you might be sick of being told to eat something and take a nap. (I don’t think we can hydrate our way out of long-term trauma and late-stage capitalistic hell, but thanks.) That said, I’ve found this site REALLY helpful. Personally, I have ADHD and CPTSD, a combination that makes it ROUGH for me to know how to take care of myself sometimes. This site speaks to you calmly, like a non-judgemental friend, and walks you through steps that you might struggle with if you have a hard time with executive function in general, or if you’re ill, grieving, overwhelmed, or otherwise just off your game. I pretty much always walk away feeling at least a little better, even if I don’t complete every step.

There are more suggestions and resources below the cut. Wishing everyone in this community love and care. <3

2. The 15-Minute Rule (info available in many places; after a quick google, I really like this site as a place to start)

One key principle to understanding the resources I’ve put together here is the 15-minute rule. If you’re feeling an urge towards physical or mental self-harm or suicide, studies show that the urge is unlikely to last more than about 15 minutes at its peak intensity. (Sorry I don’t have data on this off the bat - anecdotally, I can tell you that this rule also tracks with my own personal experience.) This means that, if you’re presently feeling overwhelmed by grief or pain that’s turning inwards on you, if you can stay afloat through the next few minutes, the tide of it is likely to ebb. The site I linked above has information about this concept and some great harm-reduction ideas, too. (Another resource on this that I liked in my quick search is here.)

3. Read This First (a compassionate distraction from feelings of self-harm)

I’m gonna be honest; this resource is aimed at folks having urges towards physical self-harm, but it looks like something I would find helpful with urges towards emotional self-harm, too. (It also looks like it could be handy for body-focused repetitive behaviors - BFRBs - like dermatillomania/skin-picking or trichotillomania/hair-pulling).

4. Resources from Pete Walker, psychotherapist and author of Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving

Obviously not everyone reading this will have complex PTSD (also called C-PTSD), but if you’re a person who, in general, tends to beat yourself up a lot, I’d highly recommend checking Pete Walker’s work out. If some of it doesn’t apply to you, that’s okay - take what you need, and leave the rest. This site (and the book it references most heavily) assumes you may have had parents who were emotionally or physically abusive or neglectful. If that doesn’t ring true for you, but other parts of the resources seem helpful, use them anyway! A handy place to start maybe this page on Shrinking the Inner Critic in Complex PTSD (that is, reducing the volume of the voice that screeches unpleasantness at you when you feel ashamed or scared).

As a note: this website looks VERY mid-2000s (which I kind of love). Most of the resources you want will be in the right-hand column full of links. Some of those links will open new pages, and some will automatically try to download a PDF of the article you want to read. 

5. Warmlines:

This is something I just learned today - if you’re feeling really lonely and sad, but you’re not in immediate crisis, there are warmlines you can contact! These seem to be numbers where you can call (or sometimes text) to talk with a counselor or trained peer when you need support and connection. I can’t vouch for any of these numbers personally, but as someone who has definitely thought, “It’s not bad enough to REALLY need help,” I think this is a fabulous idea. Here’s a list of warmlines you can check out in the US.

6. Specialized hotlines: 

There are lots of good crisis hotlines out there, but some may be better for your needs than others. For one thing, if you’re feeling seriously suicidal, it’s good to know the policies of the hotline you’re calling. In my opinion, everyone deserves bodily autonomy and the right to refuse care; for that reason, I think it’s important to know the policy of the hotline you’re calling as to whether or not they’ll call emergency services without your consent. Everyone has to make their own judgment call on this one, and I’m a little too (lightly!) triggered to go deep into my analysis on this right now, but I wanted to flag that it’s something to be aware of - if you’re going to call a hotline, you can try to look up their policy on calling emergency services before you contact them. You could probably even ask them in the beginning of the call. (A script: “Before we start, can you tell me what your policy is about contacting emergency services on behalf of callers?” If this is true, you can add: “I’m having some feelings of [suicidality/self-harm], but I’m safe and am not in danger of hurting myself or others.”)

With that in mind, here are some hotlines that seem promising to me, in no particular order:

A. For queer and trans folks in general:

Trans LifeLine

Available in the US (1-877-565-8860) and Canada (1-877-330-6366)

Available in English and Spanish

Will NOT call emergency services without your consent (you can read more about this policy on their website, including here)

Peer to peer support for transgender and questioning folks; also, microgrants (small amounts of money) for trans-related needs!

Does not offer text/chat-based support

I’ve never used Trans LifeLine myself, but I’ve heard excellent things about it from peers who have.

The Trevor Project:

Support from trained counselors for queer, trans, and questioning folks

Definitely available in the US; I’m not sure where else.

Offers support via phone [phone]), text message (678-678), and online chat (link here - scroll down to Start Chat)

Also offers an online peer support space, TrevorSpace, for folks ages 13-24

Their site says, “In very specific instances of abuse or a clear concern of an in-progress or imminent suicide, Trevor counselors may need to contact a child welfare agency or emergency service.” When you click Learn More, it takes you to their Terms of Service (informative, but in legalese that might be hard to parse if you’re in crisis).

Again, not a service I’ve used myself, but I’ve heard good things!

B. For BIPOC folks (Black folks, Indigenous folks, and people of color more broadly), especially those who also hold LQBTQI identities:

Call Blackline:

Available via phone or text (both at 1-800-604-5841)

Available for people in crisis. Call Blackline can also help connect you with local community organizers and officials if you need to report a negative, inappropriate, or physical interaction with police, other law enforcement, or vigilantes.

From their website:

Call BlackLine® provides a space for peer support, counseling, reporting of mistreatment, witnessing and affirming the lived experiences for folxs who are most impacted by systematic oppression with an LGBTQ+ Black Femme Lens.Call BlackLine® prioritizes BIPOC (Black, Indigenous, and People of Color). By us for us.

Here’s what I found regarding their policy on emergency services:

You do not have to provide any personal information to use the service. All calls remain private and will never be shared with law enforcement or state agencies of any kind.

Of course, a BIPOC person can contact any hotline for support, but for people dealing with racism, anti-Blackness, and other specific bigotries, I can very much see the importance of talking to someone who shares or understands that experience.

C. For folks processing bad psychedelic trips:

Fireside Project:

This one is something I didn’t even know existed! They do call- or text-based support (1-623-473-7433, or 1-62-FIRESIDE) for people processing psychedelic drug experiences, available 11am to 11pm Pacific time. I don’t have a ton more info, but their site seems really interesting and like they’re serving a unique need.

7. A soothing distraction:

One of the glories of the internet is the fact that it enables us to conjure up images of kittens at a moment’s notice. In that vein, I want to offer up a VERY cute distraction: Peptoc is a hotline [phone], or 1-707-8PEPTOC) where you can hear encouraging messages in English or Spanish from kindergarteners. How sweet is that? (Thanks to the wonderful @newbornwhumperfly for this suggestion!)

--------

Beloved whump community, I want to know about things that help you when you’re struggling. Please feel free to share them if you want.

And, Moya - we’ll miss you so, so much, even those of us (like me) who didn’t know you well. May your memory be an absolute blessing. <3

(I was going to put this in the tags, but oops, it’s going up here - I really hope this post will be helpful to someone, but it was also helpful to me to build. I feel better in a crisis when I can find a way to help - it’s how I soothe myself when I’m sad or scared. I really hope this doesn’t seem preachy or self-aggrandizing - it’s really just me processing-processing-processing. <3)

One more note: if this post makes you think you might want to follow my blog, you're totally welcome, but you should check out my note here first. This is not a DNI list; it's just a heads-up about my content, which could be inappropriate or triggering for some people.

#whump community #how to be a person in the world #ways to stay afloat #suicide mention cw #suicidality mention cw #self-harm mention cw #resources for taking care of yourself #bel talks #touchstones #sorry another disclaimer but also i know my experiences are not universal #my feelings might come from a really different place than other people's feelings #idk for instance if any of the shit in this post would have been at all useful to moya #but I'm sharing it anyway in case it's useful to SOMEONE

[lastoneout]

Ya know when people told me "when you're finally safe enough that you can leave survival mode and start to let go of and process your c-ptsd/trauma things are probably going to get really, really bad before they slowly start to get better" I thought that was reasonable. I did not understand that by "things are going to get bad" they meant "you're going to find yourself in the worst mental state of your entire life, but dw, that means it's working" and tbh I simply wish someone had been more clear.

Edit: If everyone could please take a minute and think about what it must feel like to be struggling and then have multiple strangers say to your face that they find the prospect of going through what you're going through so horrifying that they'd rather kill themselves and then stop leaving comments like that I would greatly appreciate it.

#hply fuck y'all I haven't felt like this?? ever??? #tryinf to be gentle with myself #but I truly feel like I'm made of glass #personal #negative #vent #cw suicide mention #ask to tag

[disco-asphodel]

realtalk but when i see dudes on steam or ppl on tumblr talking about how disco elysium made them feel pathetic and uncomfortable i just. i don’t know. i cannot relate to that at all. disco elysium is about an alcoholic amnesiac poet in love with a dying city who loves him back. if i had never been an alcoholic, if i had never been suicidally depressed, maybe i would think the world of disco elysium is a bleak one. but when you know what it’s like to go through that darkness and come out of it again? to fall back in love with a world that almost destroyed you? disco elysium is the most hopeful story imaginable. it sees the world for what it is and holds nothing back, none of the horror, none of the wonder, none of the love…

something about art comforting the disturbed and disturbing the comfortable i dunno

#disco elysium #harry du bois #cw suicide mention #i can only speak for myself ofc. but it’s one of the most hopeful stories i ever experienced #its like literature or something! #meta #text #my posts

[toboldlymuppet]

broken but not destroyed

WHAT A DISAPPOINTING AND HEARTBREAKING FINALE? To have the man who was abused, mutilated, and disabled for protecting the crew, to have a suicide attempt survivor who crawled on the ground, to have someone who battled depression and alcoholism, to cement his role as the 'Ship's Unicorn" (the figurehead that protected the crew) only to reduce him as someone who "had to die" because he had no more narrative feeling, what a slap to the face. DJenkins said he didn't want to fall back into old tropes and burying your gays, but there's an elder disabled queer man you just buried for what, to absolve Ed of his abuse? Izzy died thinking he DESERVED the torture done upon him. What a disgrace. Izzy fans rallied and kickstarted a S3 renewal Campaign. And many of us are heartbroken and grieving for a show who promised kindness but only justified the abuse we've gotten the past months? We stayed and hoped better because of kindness and belonging. "This show is kind" has never rang more hollow. I'll still love and create art for him, but I don't think I can trust any other queer show again. I thought this would be different. Do you want a queer show full of kindness and found family, for all queers, the disabled and survivors and the rough around the edges ones? It's not Our Flag Means Death.

#izzy hands #israel hands #ofmd s2 #ofmd s2 spoilers #ofmd spoilers #cw suicide mention #what a fucking disgrace of a show spouting about love and family #ofmd #our flag means death

[metamorphesque]

musings on June

1.anne sexton ("the truth the dead know"), 2. anne sexton ("suicide note poem"), 3. mary oliver ("august"), 4. l.m. montgomery ("anne of the island"), 5. morgan parker ("the black saint & the sinner lady & the dead & the truth"), 6. found poems: sylvia plath / peter k. steinberg ("percy key among the narcissi") artwork by hugo grenville

buy me a coffee  

#web weavings #june #summer #art parallels #parallels #quotes #literature #classic literature #anne sexton #mary oliver #l m montgomery #morgan parker #sylvia plath #hugo grenville #art #paintings #cw suicide mention #nature

[glitter-alienz]

CW suicidal ideation

he's trying 👍🏾

[start] [next] <- this is the start of an era... i have a bunch of comic wips about donnie being mentally ill <3

original under the cut

its by @mewechy but their blog got explded i think

#👽 my art #donnie is suicidal and BANNED from suicide jokes by splinter👍🏾 #tmntov #tmnt omniverse #tmnt fan iteration #tmntov art #tmnt donnie #tmnt leo #tmnt iteration #tmnt au #dib comics #comics #tmnt comic #comic #redraw #suicidal ideation #cw sui mention #cw suicidal ideation #suicide mention #suicide tw #tmnt fanart #tmnt fandom #tmnt art #tmnt #tmnt 2012 #rottmnt #tw suicidal ideation #digital drawing #digital art #my artwork

[incognitopolls]

We ask your questions so you don’t have to! Submit your questions to have them posted anonymously as polls.

#polls #incognito polls #anonymous #tumblr polls #tumblr users #questions #polls about relationships #submitted dec 9 #suicide cw #suicide tw #tw suicide #suicide mention #mental health #tw suicidal ideation #suicidal ideation cw

[swollenbabyfat]

Quiet now children

#mental health #mental illness #inner child healing #furry #healing #lol #suicide mention #suicidal ideation cw #violence mention #dove #swollen #deadname #lapine

[transjudas]

David Tennant on imposter syndrome (x)

#david tennant #dtedit #davidtennantedit #dtennantedit #usereena #the way he says 'i'm so sorry it turns out i can't do this anymore' #suicide mention cw #just in case <3

[vaspider]

Hey everybody, two quick things:

Do not send asks to the troll. Do not bother the troll. If I find out you're bothering the troll, the only person getting blocked is you.

And I can't believe I have to say this, but I have several times, for years, and I will say it again: anyone sending suibait to the troll gets instablocked if I find out. I've lived through the death by suicide of multiple friends and dealt with a family member's suicidal ideation for years. I have never nor will ever "send my followers" to bother people, and I explicitly am not okay with suicide threats or bait.

Now. Please show me pictures of your pets. :D Here's another picture of Davos.

#suicide baiting #cw: suicide mention #no more attention for the troll

[henegato]

the bulk of my job as an additional graphic designer on Renfield (2023) entailed creating a million flyers/posters/decorations/book covers for the bulletin boards & books in the gym where renfield's support group meets. most of them you will never get to see clearly, because they're doing their job - to set the scene, not steal your attention. that doesn't mean we didn't have fun with it, though! these are some of my favorites. i love making things that are "authentically shitty". our production designer wanted me to throw in the Heathers & Donnie Darko (which he worked on) references, so blame him for their inclusion!!

#renfield #renfield 2023 #dracula #dracula daily #count dracula #nicholas hoult #nicholas cage #chris mckay #cw suicide mention

[punkitt-is-here]

kill yourself

you guys gotta come up with better material. surely there's something more biting you could send me than just a bargain bin kill yourself. did you pick this up at the fucking gas station? i expect a little more from anonymous hate.

#cw suicide mention #my posts #asks #this websites hate mail game is WEAK

[salcreus]

The solution to depression is to have a real good punching session

#fionna and cake #finn the human #simon petrikov #adventure time #salty art #QWD #cw suicide mention

[babygirlificationn]

#nothing wrong with them 🔥🔥🔥 #ace attorney #miles edgeworth #adrian andrews #farewell my turnabout #digital art #fanart #art #my art :D #ace attorney fanart #aa #cw suicide mention #tw suicice mention #just to be safe. #i drew this post to supposedly celebrate me FINALLY beating justice for all. but alas it has been sitting in my drafts for a week #and i havent touched aa in two weeks. oops. anyway we are celebrating me *almost* finishing justice for all !!!! rejoice!!!!

[gascansposts]

Hi hello I am not dead I just super into dp x dc fix and now. Well… tw for death and stuff, but it’s Danny what can you expect?

Oh and also I’ve literally never drawn any of the dc people like ever so if their inaccuracies umm, excuse me I suppose? Anyways-

(Last two are the reason of the tw!)

Haha Danny <3

#doodles #art #arty art #yep #danny phantom #danny fenton #dp x dc crossover #dp x dc #dp x dc au #jason todd #tim drake #damian wayne #the wayne family #batman #batfam #danny phantom au #tw suicide mention #Cw suicide mention #tw death #cw death #ghost danny #like actually #just. #real ghost Danny #real ghost Danny au #for now #yeah I’ll explain #LATER #BOZO #AJAJJAJAJAJ

[its-arson-time]

crazy that you can say "i think telling anyone to kill themselves is bad, even people you hate" or "i think doxxing people is bad, even people you hate" and thats a hot take somehow

#arson screams #idk i just feel like the baseline level of human decency respect doesnt go away just because you hate someone #suicide mention #suicide mention cw #the rampant suicide baiting on this site is crazy #the amount of 'i think xyz creator should kill themselves' no !!! no no no