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#sure I was only there for this week so what's the point to get to know me or whatever
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freedom felt like summer | joel miller
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Summary | Weeks of flirting back and forth with your neighbour Joel all comes to a head when he makes sure every inch of you in covered in suncream.
Pairing | Joel Miller x F!Reader
Word Count | 2.6K
Warnings | Explicit - reader wears a bikini and uses sun cream but is otherwise a blank slate. Alcohol consumption. Swearing, flirting, and dirty talk. Explicit smut - oral (f receiving), fingering, unprotected PiV smut, creampie. No outbreak au and no use of y/n.
Authors Note | We've had a slither of sun in the UK and this is what happens. Big thanks to @undercoverpena for the shorts idea ;) I hope you enjoy! If you do, please consider reblogging, leaving comments or leaving a tip via my Ko-Fi.
Divider by the wonderful @saradika
Main Masterlist | Ko-Fi.
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There’s nothing quite like an Austin summer. Hot sun beating down, but with the new pool your parents had built when you’d moved out and their fully stocked fridge of soda and ice, it wasn’t too bad at all.
They’d gone on their annual holiday, two weeks in Mexico, which meant you had two weeks of lounging by the pool, soaking up the sun and bleeding them for their food and drinks. No responsibilities, is what you’d told yourself, laptop shut and job applications waiting, whilst you soaked the sun into your skin and made margaritas too strong once the clock struck 1pm.
The heat across your skin had dried the chlorine water quickly, coconut scented suncream slathered across every inch you could reach, not worrying about your back because it was pressed against the back of the lounger. You’re just started to drift off, eyes closing behind your sunglasses, when a voice jolts you.
“You manage to reach your back with that?”
There’s a small smirk that flashes across your mouth, quickly bitten away by your teeth as you sit up and turn around a little, looking over to the fence where Joel Miller is leaning over, pointing to the bottle of suncream on the small table next to you.
“Hard to reach there when it’s just me,” You shrug, “But it’s okay, it’s not getting any of the sun anyhow.”
He shakes his head and makes a tsk sound with his tongue against his teeth, “Don’t mean you shouldn’t try and cover it,” He says, sounding more like your dad than you’d care to admit, “The sun ain’t gonna look at that lounger and think it can’t burn you.”
“Well, I'm here on my own,” You offer, “Unless you’re gonna volunteer to smear it on my back, Miller, I'm gonna have to risk it.”
You can see him thinking over the fence, wondering if this is a good idea, much like he’s been thinking since you came home - degree done, jobs waiting - he’d flirted with you at your dad’s cookout in honour of you graduating, swapped numbers with you the day your parents left for vacation ‘in case you needed him’, and has spent the last week making any excuse to peek his head over the fence and talk to you, specifically when you’re out in your bikini, mostly when you’re dripping wet from coming out of the pool.
He holds his finger up and then disappears from view, only to come back seconds later through the gate at the bottom of your garden that connects your land with his. Your dad had been weary of it at first, but as soon as he’d met Joel, they’d hit it off, and now the gate is used more than the front door when they want to drink together.
He’s dressed simply, a pair of jeans and a worn t-shirt. Too stifling for you, you think, but you know he’s spent most of his life on building sites, so he must be used to the heat of the sun on his skin. Joel comes to a stop near the small table, but instead of picking up the bottle of cream, he opts for the half-empty glass of margarita you’d made not too long ago. He takes a sip and makes a face, which makes you laugh.
“Never understand how you women like this stuff.”
Setting the glass down, he picks up the bottle of cream and flips the lid, motioning for you to sit up, which you do, turning on the lounger so your back is facing him. The bottle of cream is really on its last legs, coming to the very end, so you can hear the bottle express more air than cream the first time he squeezes it. You hear him rubbing his hands together and then feel him step a little closer to your back.
“Ready?” He asks, voice low, to which you nod your head.
Then his hands are on you and it’s better than you ever had thought. They’re rough against your skin, but the way they’re gliding across your back is gentle. His hands drag the cream down your spine to the band of your bikini top, before he’s working it into your skin, all the way up to the nape of your neck. You can feel your head tipping forward, struggling to stifle a groan when you feel him gently shift one of the straps of your top down so he can bring the cream up and over your shoulders, his hand big enough that his fingers brush your collarbone. He repeats his actions on the other side, making sure to bring the straps back up when he’s done, then he gives your shoulder a gentle squeeze.
“All done.”
“You’re a professional at that, Miller,” You praise, “Spend a lot of time rubbing suncream into girls backs, do you?”
“All the time.” Is his dry response as you move to lay back down.
When you turn your head, he’s already walking away.
“You can stay,” You offer, “If you’ve got nothing else to do.”
He stands still for a second before he turns over his shoulder, “Let me change and then I’ll come back.”
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He’s doing this on purpose, you think, as you watch him glide under the water again, head dipping up as his arms work him down the pool where he comes to a stop, taking wet hands to slick his hair back from his forehead.
“You ever thought of having your own built?” You ask, sipping from the fresh margarita you’d made.
He shakes his head, “Thought about it a fair bit when Sarah was younger but now it would be wasted on me,” He explains, “Besides, I can always come and use yours,” You watch him bend his knees a little in the water so his chest is submerged, “Kinda hot out there, why don’t you come in a cool off.”
Joel has a point, even though it’s mid-afternoon now, the heat is still just as strong as it was when it was midday, so you drag yourself as carefully as you can manage off the lounger and plop yourself down on the side of the pool, dipping your legs in as Joel swims over. You expect him to stop, but he doesn’t, just puts his big palms on your upper thighs and spreads your legs wide, settling himself between them. You lean back, palms against the warm stone behind you, and push your sunglasses onto your head so he can see your eyes.
“Finally gonna make your move, huh?” You ask, eyebrow raised.
“Somethin’ like that.”
His palms are dragging up your thighs, resting on the band of your bikini bottoms, looking up at you like he’s waiting for permission, which you gladly give with a nod of your head. His fingers are hooking into the waistband and dragging down, you lift your hips to make it easier for him, and watch as he steps back in the water to drag them down your legs, leaving them forgotten on the side of the pool as he spreads your thighs wide. You’re not even think about the neighbours on the other side as you watch him, eyes focused on your bare cunt in front of him.
“Like what you see, Miller?” You ask, with a smirk, reaching your hand down your body, using two fingers to gently spread your folds in front of his face, dragging one up the length of your pussy to play with your clit.
You swear he growls at you, big hand gripping your wrist to drag your hand away from your core. He steps back between your thighs and uses the hand not gripping your wrist to push you back a little. Then his mouth is pressing hot kisses to your thighs, working up and across your tummy, back down the other side until you’re squirming and ready to beg.
You can feel the back of his knuckles drag up and down the folds of your cunt, “You gonna be wet if I touch you?” He asks, tone low.
“Why don’t you find out.”
So he does, using a single finger to dip between your folds, dragging down gently until he’s pressing it into your cunt, easy because you are in fact already dripping for him. You feel him work his finger in and out of you, before he’s adding a second and curling them up inside you at just the right angle to have your head tipping back and a moan dropping from your mouth.
“Gotta be quiet, Darlin’,” Joel speaks, “Do you want next door knowin’ what you’re up to?”
You’re about to come back with some smart retort when he leans forward and uses the tip of his tongue to flick gently against your clit, making it all the more harder to keep your moans at bay. Joel continues the light flick of his tongue against you whilst his fingers more in and out of your cunt, until he switches things up and wraps his lips around your clit, suckling it into his mouth whilst his fingers remain buried deep inside you, curling up in a ‘come hither’ motion to caress that perfect spot inside you.
Your hands fly to his hair, tangling deep in his chocolate curls, keeping his face flush to where he’s working you towards the edge.
“Jesus fucking Christ, Joel,” You breathe out, “Don’t stop, please, I’m gonna come.”
At your words, he doubles down, moving his fingers faster inside of you, sucking at your clit with more vigour. He pushes you over the edge easily, easier than anyone ever has before, legs shaking, skin alight, a silent scream sent forth to the sky as his mouth works you through it. Your body feels like jelly when he finally pulls away from you, but there’s enough energy left through your body that you can pull your legs from the water and get up onto your knees.
“Get out of the water, cowboy,” You murmur, bending down to press your lips to Joel’s, tasting yourself on his mouth, “I wanna fuck.”
You push yourself back from him, shuffling back to let him pull himself out of the water. His swim shorts are wet, rivulets of water dripping into pools at his feet, but all your eyes can really focus on is the outline of his cock through his wet shorts. He’s hard and from what you can tell, he’s big. It makes your mouth water, makes you want to wrap your lips around it, but it seems like he has other ideas for you. He’s dragging you up from your knees, walking you over to the low patio chairs, where he sits himself down on one and promptly drags you onto his lap, your thighs wide as they straddle him in the chair.
Your naked pussy is dragging against the wet bulge of his jeans, his hands moving your hips as you lean down again to kiss him, the endless flirting and build up over the last few weeks finally coming to a head as you let your tongue run against his, his hands lifting your hips a little so he can reach between the two of you to pull his shorts down just enough to free his cock.
You can feel the thick line of him running through your folds, wide head of his cock brushing against your clit as he moves, making you moan into his mouth just as he pulls away.
“You wanna sit on it?” He asks lowly, hands moving back to grip your bare ass, spreading you wide.
“I do.”
“Go on then, darlin’,” He speaks, “Show me what you’re made of.”
He helps raise your hips, letting you reach between the two of you to grip his cock, lining him up with your seeping entrance, sinking down just enough to let the tip of his cock notch into you. You lean your forehead against his, both damp with sweat, and revel in the fact that his mouth drops open in a sigh of pleasure just at the same time as yours does. You ease yourself down onto his cock a little more, letting the slight burn and stretch of him easing in, inch by inch, set your skin aflame.
You still once you’ve sunk down fully onto him, letting yourself get used to his length nestled inside you. You feel your cunt fluttering around him, and you know he can feel it too, his teeth sinking into his bottom lip when you start lifting yourself off him and sink back down.
“Shit, baby,” He breathes, leaning up to catch your mouth with his briefly, “You’re so fuckin’ tight.”
He makes you smile when he says things like that, it makes you bold, makes you lift up on him, almost all the way, and then sink back down, but harder and faster than before. As you move, Joel lets go of his grip on your ass and brings them to your bikini top, slipping the straps down, then pulling the material over your tits. He leans down, sucking a nipple into his mouth, rolling his tongue against it until it’s a stiff peak, switching sides to give the same attention to the other.
Once he’s given enough attention to your tits, he takes your hips in his hands, guiding your movements from bouncing to grinding, his cock sitting right within the depths of you as you move backwards and forwards on him. Joel brings a hand between you, using his thumb to draw rough circles over your clit.
“I need to feel you,” He breathes against your skin, “Need to feel you come on my cock.”
“Just…” You breathe right back, “Don’t stop, keep doing that, I’m right there.”
Joel leans up, mouth hot against the skin of your neck as he starts to suck at your skin, tip of his cock brushing just perfectly against that spot inside you as the familiar feeling at your spine builds and builds until it’s crashing over you. You bury your head in his neck, damp with sweat and the remnants of pool water, letting out the quietest moan you can manage as your pussy pulls tight around his length and you feel yourself gush against him, his thumb continuing to work you through the aftershocks of your orgasm.
“You gotta tell me where,” He mutters urgently, “I’m close baby, where do you want me.”
“Inside,” You beg against his skin, realising it was muffled, you turn your head and speak again, “Inside me Joel, please.”
It only takes a few more deep grinds of your hips before he’s gripping your hips tight to keep you still, spilling inside you, warmth spreading through your cunt and as groans your name quietly, so as not to alert the neighbours as to what they just missed in your backyard.
He pulls you close, arms wrapping around your lower back, both of you catching your breath for a moment. You press a kiss to his chest, nuzzling your face into his warm skin as his softening cock slips from your tight heats. You can feel the trickle of his cum down your inner thigh, but make no effort to move, enjoying the feeling of his arms around you.
“Same time tomorrow?” You mumble against his skin.
“Same time tomorrow, baby.”
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penkura · 2 days
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First Mother's Day
Note: I decided to do a special post in what is now my OP Men as Dads series, and do a Mother's Day headcanon/blurb post. I understand this day can be rough for some, but I hope that whether you celebrate or not, whether your mom is in your life or not, that you have a lovely day otherwise and if this isn't your cup of tea, I hope there's something else that can entertain you today. <3
If you'd like my thoughts on other OP men as dads (Shanks, Kid, Usopp, etc.), please just ask and I'll give an answer! I'll include Luffy in this despite my viewing him as a son or brother, but it probably won't be x Reader based. Requests are being worked on as well.
I am using baby Ace image to break up this and the actual content from now on lol. He's just so cute. 🥺
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Ace is going to go all out for your first Mother’s Day. He’s buying flowers, candies, and cards, all from him and your daughter. Even if you tell him you don’t want anything except a quiet day at home with the two of them, he’s buying you gifts.
He’ll likely buy you a bracelet with your daughter’s name on it, or maybe a charm bracelet with her birthstone, so you can add any more in the future if/when you have more children. Ace will try to make you breakfast in bed, but he ends up burning the bacon to the point your smoke alarm goes off, and you have to open all the windows to air out the house the rest of the day (at least it’s a nice day out). He orders out breakfast from a nearby diner to make sure you have something that morning, he’ll even try to take your daughter out for a walk or to Luffy and Sabo’s place for the day to give you a break, but you insist on going along.
“You should have the day off though!”
“Ace, I don’t want a day off. Rogue is only three month’s old, and I’d much rather spend the day with you and her than alone. That’s not a fun Mother’s Day to me.”
The three of you end up at Luffy and Sabo’s place, the two uncles absolutely adoring their niece as she coos and lets them hold her without any crying or fussing. When you get home later that night, Ace watches you get Rogue ready for bed. He knew from the start that you would be a great mother, and sometimes, he just wishes his own mother was around to see it, and to meet her granddaughter.
~~
Law has a plan that gets thrown off when your son decides to be born a week earlier than expected, on Mother’s Day itself. He still tries to do something for you, even though the original plan of taking you out for brunch and giving you a quiet day at home while you waited for your baby to be born was now out the window. He should’ve known, ever since he met Luffy all his plans go haywire at some point. At least it led to you two meeting eventually.
Once you’ve gone to sleep and your son Rosi is in the nursery at the hospital, Law slips out to quickly put something together. He has a gift for you, a mother’s ring that will fit into your wedding band, he just needs flowers, or chocolate, or something to add to it. He doesn’t really like to be cliché, but he ends up with flowers, at least they’re something pretty you can have in your hospital room and when you’re released to take your baby boy home.
The girl in the hospital gift shops tells him he looks happy, even if Law doesn’t really show it. She swears it’s just something in the way he speaks while he asks her to pull together a small bouquet for you. He is happy, beyond that actually, knowing you two have a son, you both are healthy and safe. He has a family again, his very own. The flowers and ring aren’t enough to convey his gratitude to you for giving him a family to call his own, but it’s a start. There will be plenty more times for him to do so in the future.
When Law gets back to your room, you’re awake again and in the middle of nursing your son, a nurse helping you when you need it. She notices the flowers he’s brought and leaves you both with a smile, saying she’ll come back in a few minutes.
“Where’d you get off to?”
“Had to get something,” Law comes over and presses a kiss to your forehead, giving you a smile, “Happy Mother’s Day.”
~~
Penguin has thought of what to do every day since your daughter Wren was born. He’s come up with multiple ways to celebrate your first Mother’s Day, but nothing seems just right to him. He’s thought of brunch, breakfast in bed, giving you a day out with your friends while he watches your daughter, or even a weekend trip away, leaving your baby with her grandparents, but nothing works out. Restaurants and diners he calls are all booked up already, you hate eating in bed because of crumbs, your friends all had plans either with their own mothers or their spouses and kids, and your own parents were out of town for the next two weeks.
He ends up with no real plans for the day and feels terrible about it as it approaches. Its going to be another normal Sunday for the three of you, he hates the idea of that because it’s your first Mother’s Day, it should be special, shouldn’t it?
When the day finally comes around, Penguin is up first, hearing Wren’s little babbles through the baby monitor, and going to pick her up. At nine-months-old she’s figured out how to stand up on her own, still no steps being taken by herself, but when she sees Penguin enter the nursery, she grins and starts bouncing up and down, holding the rail of her crib and shouting “da” over and over. It makes Penguin smile as he picks her up, kissing her chubby cheek which makes her squeal.
“Good morning, Wren! Let’s keep quiet, mommy’s still asleep, okay?”
“Da!”
He laughs a bit, lifting her up over his head to make her giggle again, as she reaches her little hands towards his face.
“You know…a great gift would be for you to say ‘mama’ for the first time, yeah?”
“Ma?”
“Yeah, you’re close! Now, just say ‘mama’.”
Wren sticks her tongue out while she tries to speak, Penguin helping her along for several minutes until she finally says something close to ‘mama’.
“Mm…ma.”
Penguin sighs a bit, but nods as he brings Wren down and kisses her cheek again, making her giggle as she wraps her arms around his neck.
“You two sure have been having fun.”
Both look to you in the doorway, no shortage of smiles among the three of you, as Wren lights up and starts to reach for you, trying to say she wants you to hold her. You both take just a moment too long to get her to you, and it makes her fuss and kick her legs a bit.
“Ma…ma!”
You didn’t even get her in your arms, you and Penguin both freezing in place for a moment while Wren continues to fuss and whine, almost in tears since you haven’t held her yet.
“Mama!”
“I—”
“Her first word!!” You quickly take Wren from Penguin and hug her close, kissing her cheeks and forehead telling her how proud you are of your little girl. “This is the best Mother’s Day gift!”
At least that worked out, even if he didn’t have a plan in mind.
~~
Sanji wouldn’t have waited nearly a year to celebrate you as a mother if you hadn’t forced him to. With fraternal twins to now take care of and raise, you’ve both been through bouts of exhaustion and elation over the two babies you brought into the world. Sora and Angel, your precious blessings, were nearly a year old, and you’d already started planning a birthday party for them, completely ignoring the fact Mother’s Day was a few weeks prior to their turning one-year-old.
Sanji didn’t forget, he had a plan, one that included your twins scribbling away to make cards for you, though he didn’t expect the two to be so fussy about it and mark each other up more than the papers. He learned very quickly to not give babies or toddlers markers, unless they were washable. You still don’t fully realize how Sora ended up with a bright green mark over his right eye and Angel had a hot pink line down her left arm.
The rest was simple, breakfast in bed, made by your professional chef husband of course, and whatever else you wanted for the rest of the day. If you want to lay in bed and watch TV without interruption, he’d put your twins in the stroller and take them to the park. If you wanted to turn your phone off and sleep the day away, he’d take over and leave you alone until you needed anything. Whatever you want, it’s a day to celebrate you as the mother of his children, he wasn’t going to deny you anything.
But when you do tell him what you want, after finishing off breakfast, Sanji’s a bit surprised.
“Are you…sure?”
“Mm-hm,” you nod and try to keep Sora from grabbing the butter knife on the tray, making him whine while Angel slept in Sanji’s arms, “I want to spend the day with the three of you.”
“You…do that every day though, my love.”
“So?” smiling, you kiss the top of Sora’s head and watch Angel as she starts to stir awake, rubbing her eyes with her tiny hands, “You guys are my family. I hate the idea of not being with the three of you today, so I’d rather just spend it like we always do.”
Sanji nods a bit, seeming to understand, greeting Angel when she wakes up fully with a kiss to the forehead. It makes you happy to watch him with both your children, but especially your daughter. How could he ever think you’d want to spend the day alone? Not when you had these two blessings as your children and Sanji as your husband.
“We could still take these two to the park later, maybe burn off some energy so they nap at a decent time.”
“Of course! Whatever you want, my love.”
~~
Zoro doesn’t even fully realize that its Mother’s Day until Nami says something to him. The past few weeks with your son have been exhausting for both of you, but he can’t believe he forgot that this was a thing. He has nothing planned and isn’t sure what to do. He’s running out of time, it’s literally just a few hours away before Nami offers to take you out for the day wherever the Sunny docks in the morning. Zoro will stay with your son on the ship, and you’ll get a day off from being a mom and wife, the two think it’s the best thing to give you on such short notice, though Nami does up the interest on his debt again for this.
You don’t even get to say good morning to your husband or son before Nami has dragged you off to whatever she has planned, its really just a normal girl’s day out with shopping and lunch. Most of what you buy isn’t even for you, it’s baby items that you need or clothes you think are adorable. It just ended up making you miss your son more as the day went on.
When you do get back to the ship, your son is wailing and no one has been able to calm him down, not even Zoro while he tries his hardest and lightly bounces your baby as he shushes him gently. As soon as you drop your bags you’re taking him from your husband and holding him close to calm him down.
“Shh, shh, it’s okay, mommy’s here, Keitaro. I’m back.”
He slowly calms down once he realizes its you, burying his little face in your shoulder and keeping a tight grip on your shirt. When you ask Zoro what the deal was with Nami dragging you off the ship so early, before you even had the chance to hold Keitaro that day, he explains the situation and it just makes you tilt your head.
“…it’s Mother’s Day?”
You hadn’t even realized it. That just makes Zoro feel bad that it caused your son such distress, and he and Nami both apologize for not talking to you about it beforehand. They both assumed the other had discussed it with you. You didn’t really care to celebrate, all that mattered was being with your husband and son, the rest of your day spent with just the two of them.
Note 2: Out here dropping names like I didn't say I'd make a post about that at some point lol. So, the firstborns in order of character are Portgas D. Rogue, Trafalgar D. Rosinante (called Rosi cause it's too damn cute), Wren, Sora and Angel, and Roronoa Keitaro.
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royaltozaki · 2 days
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you can kiss a hundred boys in bars
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synopsis: good luck, babe! - inspired fic (essentially sana left 6 years ago and you still can't stop thinking about her even though you're married to another man)
warnings: cheating, internalised homophobia, not chronological, implied sex, cursing
w/c: 6.4k
a/n: hi 😀 this one may not hit as many of the audiences but it was interesting to write. i zon't think i like it toooo much for how much time i spent on it (edit: the moots have made my day i do like this one a lot actually) but just one of those things i needed to get out before i was able to move on to the next thing :P weeeEEEEHHEEEE i love angst!!!!!!!
ok this one's going to be a bit different guys pls READ THIS or you'll be like what the fuck. purple text is the present. ty enjoy, that was it LOL.
▂▂⌇
you wake up with a migraine. it came not long after you married frank and it’s stayed ever since. you sit up on the bed, careful not to make too much movement or sound to wake your husband next to you. although that was pretty unlikely anyway considering how he slept.
you sigh lightly, holding your head in your hands trying to mitigate the damage.
your head starts drifting off, as it did on most nights these days. it seemed the only thing that ever worked to stop the pounding in your head was thinking about her.
▂▂⌇
funnily enough, sana was actually the reason you and frank had met.
it had happened when the both of you were at a bar after class celebrating the end of exams. sana being sana had made a whole group of friends 10 minutes upon entering the establishment. you were sitting back watching her challenge someone to down the most shots in one minute. you would have stopped her on another day but after the hell week she's been through with her finals, you figured she deserved it. and you'd be there to take her home afterwards anyway.
she's whooping and jumping around, turning back to you with a grin when she wins. the poor loser skulking away back to his friends.
frank goes up to her then. introducing himself with that kind voice of his, just making sure she had someone to go home with and look after her.
and sana adored the attention. she's flirting with that charm of hers that no one could resist. but strangely enough, frank resisted. he was a gentleman, not wanting to pursue anything while sana was intoxicated, instead, he asked who could look after her, and sana points to you.
▂▂⌇
you're not getting back to sleep. instead you silently step out of bed, grabbing your phone and the hidden pack of cigarettes you kept in the second drawer of your bedside cupboard.
you step outside onto the balcony, breathing in the cool night air, shivering a little as you wrap the blanket you left on the balcony chair around you.
you click the lighter on, the small flame illuminating the darkness of the night, the only other light source aside from the moon. you're thinking if sana's somewhere she can see the moon right now while you put the lighter to the end of your cigarette. is it night for her? was she asleep? did she ever think about you?
you bring the stick to your mouth, inhaling, feeling the roughness of the nicotine hit your lungs, and exhaling softly, watching the wisps of smoke dissolve into the night sky.
sana hated when you smoked. frank didn't like it too much either, but he was never able to stop you.
▂▂⌇
"do you have to do that here?" sana's frowning when you release a puff of smoke into the air.
"sorry. stressed." you mumble in response, cig still stuck between your lips.
"you know i can help with that. just not when you taste like an ashtray." sana's still staring at the cancer stick you're sucking on with contempt, she never hated anything but if you had to place your money on something it'd be your bad habit.
you're smiling sheepishly, taking the cigarette out of your mouth and smooshing the end until it's not burning anymore.
the frown on her face is gone immediately, she's charmed you listen to her so easily. and she sticks to her word, stepping closer and leaning in.
your lips meet lazily, she's got a hand on your cheek, the other at your waist. you're wrapping your arms around her hips, holding her against you as your lips slot against each other.
sana was an attractive woman. there was no doubt about that. the two of you had met during high school. she had caught you sneaking off for a smoke during P.E. and had somehow convinced you to go and get your nails done with her instead. ever since then you two had been inseperable.
it was after you broke up with your first boyfriend in college that you started sleeping together. you remember he had decided to call it off because he was going all mormon and was ashamed of having had sex already, calling you a 'sex-addicted whore who was sent by the devil to tempt him into the flames of hell'. sana despised that he made you feel unwanted, and even more that he blamed you for the break up. she needed you to know just how valued you were, just how wanted you were, and in her drunk dazed mind that meant worshipping you until you came crying under her. and in your drunk dazed, heartbroken, self-pitying mind, you let her.
when it happened again, and again, and again, and then not under any alcoholic influence, the both of you decided to continue seeking each other out for sexual relief whenever you were stressed, or in any sort of mood that called for sex. you stopped every time one of you started a new relationship, but you always found your way back into each other's arms eventually.
▂▂⌇
you curse lightly when you reach the end of your cigarette.
picking out another one, you’re repeating your actions, lighting it up, bringing it between your lips, inhaling, feeling it fill your lungs, and then pushing it back out.
there hasn’t been a single day that’s gone by where you hadn’t thought about sana. frank didn’t get it at first. he asked you why you couldn’t just call her, you two were the best of friends, surely it wouldn’t be that difficult to reconnect?
he didn’t know you slept with sana on the night of you and frank’s wedding. doesn’t know the countless times you’ve slept with her before that. doesn’t know sana woke up earlier than you the next day, disappearing into the early morning, no note, no text, nothing. you were too ashamed to try and contact her for weeks after that, it wasn’t until you came back from your honeymoon that you realised you were knocking on an empty door when you tried to find her at her apartment. it was cleaned out, no furniture, no remnants of her, nothing to prove she even existed. you had called her over and over, tears of desperation spilling over, holding back choked sobs that only grew stronger with each voicemail message.
it wasn't until sana's old landlord holding a 'for lease' sign in his hand comes and kicks you out that you finally realise you'd lost her.
after that, your relationship with frank started to deteriorate. what did you expect though? was it sana's fault? if sana hadn't left would you have lived happily ever after, the three of you together?
it took a long time to realise the answer to that was no. you spent years blaming sana for leaving, and when you finally came to the terms that you were the one who drove her away, it was too much to bear.
▂▂⌇
"y/n!"
you smile at the sound of sana calling you in the corridor, turning to meet her hug as she crashes into you.
she starts talking your ear off and you nod along enthusiastically, but suddenly she stops, looks down to your hand, intertwined with someone else's.
"oh. who's this y/n?"
you look over at your newest boyfriend in surprise, almost forgetting he was holding your hand and standing next to you. you tended to forget a lot of things when sana was around.
"oh this is danny. we met at that bar i told you about last week remember?"
"hmm..." she's looking up at him in scrutiny, eyes squinted and eyebrows furrowed. you can feel danny's palms start to sweat under her gaze.
"one week huh? not bad, let's see how long you last, if you go longer than a month then i'll introduce myself to you." sana says then.
"sana!" you're hitting her lightly, flabbergasted at her insinuation.
"what? your last one was like 3 days. you just keep breaking these guys' hearts y/n." she places a hand over her heart dramatically.
danny's tightening his grip around your hand, speaking up, "excuse me, i don’t appreciate you wishing doom on our relationship even before its started. and i wouldn’t want to be introduced to a slut who’s never had a real relationship before anyway.”
sana’s speechless for a second but her face morphs into a scowl quickly after, “okay danny,” spitting out his name, “first rule of being a decent boyfriend? don’t talk shit about your girlfriend’s best friends. let’s see you last another hour after that comment.” she turns to you, raising an eyebrow, “you gonna let him off with that y/n?”
you’re stuck, and danny’s looking at you expectantly.
“sana… that comment was a little uncalled for y’know… you did kinda start this…”
danny’s smirking, looking smugly back towards sana.
“what?! are you serious right now y/n? y’know what? i don’t care. your life and whatever. see you later.” she’s stomping off, your heart sinking as you watch her.
“c’mon babe, forget her. let’s go get sushi.” danny doesn’t wait for a response before he’s pulling you in the other direction.
▂▂⌇
when you wake up again the next day, frank’s gone.
you stumble to your feet, clumsily making your way to the bathroom.
it’s almost late afternoon already. you’re lucky you didn’t have work today.
sana always used to scold you if you woke up past noon. she said you'd waste the whole day sleeping when you could have been spending it with her.
these days the second option wasn't exactly viable.
you cringe a little when you catch sight of yourself in the mirror. unkempt hair, dark circles under your eyes, visible signs of ageing. you'd bet sana still looked as radiant as she was all those years ago.
your phone starts buzzing when you turn on your electric toothbrush. it couldn't be anyone else other than frank. you didn't really talk to anyone else anyway. after sana left, you became a social recluse, and a lot of your friends were technically sana's friends so without that mutual connection anymore, you drifted from them very quickly.
“hello?”
“hey y/n, is my white button-up back from the dry cleaners yet? i need it tonight for this work event.”
“… no you didn’t tell me to pick anything up.”
“what? i left a note for you on the fridge did you not see it?”
“i just woke up frank.”
“it’s 2pm.”
“yeah.”
you can hear him sigh over the phone, “alright it’s fine i’ll pick it up after work.” he hangs up abruptly after he says that.
no goodbye, no i love you, he doesn’t call you by any pet names anymore either, just y/n. well it’s not like you did any of those things for him so you suppose it’s fair. he did do a lot of those things when you were dating and early in your marriage but eventually, when you stopped responding and got more and more tired of being with him, he stopped trying as well. you can’t even remember the last time you were intimate together.
frank had suggested the both of you try out marriage counselling but you were strongly against the idea. you didn’t feel particularly excited about disclosing everything that went on with sana with frank let alone with a complete stranger. you remember that week you fought about it and you ran away and didn’t come back until a month later. frank only tried to call you once during that time.
▂▂⌇
you were standing in front of an apartment door in japan.
you weren’t really thinking when you stood at the front desk of the airport, demanding a ticket for the next flight to osaka with only a small backpack and some essentials you were able to grab after your fight with frank.
it wasn’t until you were physically in the plane that you realised you didn’t actually know anyone but sana there. and you had made that unconscious decision because being with frank was simply too… nothing, and being with sana was… everything. it had been over 6 years since you had seen her last, when she left you that quiet night in may.
though it seems fate was on your side this time. sana’s cousin just happened to be working at the airport the night you arrived, when she recognised you, she was waving excitedly, ushering you over.
“y/n right? oh my goodness i haven’t seen you in so long! not since that time sana brought you here 7 years ago right?” her accent is a little thick but you’re grateful she can speak korean regardless, you could only understand very basic japanese picked up from sana.
you’re nervously rubbing the back of your neck, “ahaha yeah… do you actually happen to have sana’s address?”
she frowns a little, “she didn’t give it to you when she found out you were coming?”
it seems like sana hasn’t told many people about your relationship with her either.
“u-um ahaha no she must have forgotten. you know how she gets… too excited she forgets the important little details.”
the cousin laughs a little in response, agreeing and quickly typing in sana’s address on your phone. internally you’re thanking all the gods and deities you know of for this stroke of luck or you’d really be stranded in osaka with no knowledge of the language and nowhere to stay.
“i have to get back to work but say hi to sana for me! we haven’t seen her much since she came back a few years ago, she’s been really busy with work i think.”
you nod, heart pounding at the tidbits of information you’re getting about sana. anything to fill in the 6 year gap you’ve been apart.
you wave goodbye, thanking her again and then you’re hailing down a taxi and showing the driver the destination on your phone.
so now you’re standing in front of her apartment door, hands sweaty and nervous, just praying she wouldn’t kick you out or worse.
you’ve been standing here stupidly, deliberating when, how, if you should even knock. when there’s a slight commotion to your left, the sound of a bag of groceries dropping and a light gasp.
“y/n?”
it’s very cinematic when you turn, sana coming into view for the first time in so long is like finding water in a desert. you’re drinking her in hungrily, her darker hair, smile lines, perfect nose, she looks just as beautiful as you remember.
“sana…” you’re voice is hoarse with emotion.
she’s taking slow steps towards you after picking up her groceries. one… two…
“what are you doing here?”
“i-i- u-um i-“
“how did you get my address?”
“u-um i saw y-your cousin at the airport and she recognised me and i- i may have asked her for your address... i'm sorry! i would have called or like let you know but... y'know... i-i couldn't really do that..."
she considers you for a little bit, looking you up and down, her face stoic.
"...did you come here for something then?"
"i- um- well not really it was k-kinda an impulse decision. u-um frank and i fought and i just- i don't know i went to the airport and i found myself here i guess..."
you notice how her hand tightens at the mention of frank's name, the slight sound of the crinkling of her grocery bag.
"and what did you want me to do about that?" she's pushing past you now, taking out her keys and starting to unlock her door. you begin to panic, scrambling for words.
"i- sana please! i- i'm sorry! i'm sorry okay?"
the jingling of her keys stops, but she doesn't look back at you.
"what are you sorry for? i'm the one who left remember?" her voice is bitter and a little shaky, you realise she's not facing you because she's trying not to cry. you ache to hold her.
"i… i’m the reason you left though. right? it took me a long time to realise but i’m sorry i wasn’t able to be true to myself and i’m sorry you were a casualty to that. i missed you sana…." your voice is quiet, you feel your own tears welling up in your eyes.
“… what weren’t you true to yourself about?”
you take a big inhale, breath shaky when you let it back out. “that i love you.” your voice is tiny, you just confessed your love for the woman you’ve spent most of your life with, the woman that’s occupied your mind every second of every minute since she’s entered your life. the woman you were too scared to admit you loved, who waited for you to do exactly that only for you to enter a loveless marriage with someone else. you can only imagine the pain you’ve put her through. it would be nothing compared to the last 6 years without her. and the last 6 years without sana were undoubtedly the worst of your life.
sana’s sniffling now, unable to hold back her cries.
you inch forward and tentatively place a hand on her shoulder. when she doesn’t move it, you shift closer again to wrap your arms around her loosely.
suddenly sana’s turning and burrowing her face in your neck, you feel her wet tears stain your skin, but also your own start to run down your face. you're surrounded with sana sana sana, her smell, her sounds, the feel of her against you when you tighten your arms around her. you missed this so fucking much. you missed her. and for the first time in 6 years, you finally felt like you were home again.
▂▂⌇
after you've finished your morning routine, you lazily trudge into the kitchen, discarding the small note frank had told you about, and pouring yourself a bowl of cereal.
you sigh into the empty house. frank wanted kids of course, that's why you bought such a large house in the first place. he had dreamt of the whole white-picket fence family and you were excited to share that with him and sana. she had helped you design the place, decorate it when you first moved in, she was meant to move across the street and you were going to grow old together and watch as your kids played around and became the best of friends, just like the two of you were.
now though? you hated this house. it just felt so much more empty. you and frank had tried for kids, although that only really drove you further apart. sex just became more of a chore than something you enjoyed, and when people know you're trying to get pregnant? suddenly everyone has their 2 cents on what you should eat, what types of exercise you should do, the latest superfood that was meant to make you more fertile. everyone seemed to have more control over your own relationship, over your own body than you did.
eventually, the small amounts of love you and frank had for each other, fizzled out. and you decided you didn't want to raise a child in a loveless marriage, that wouldn't be fair to them. frank, even with his endless optimism and kind soul, agreed.
▂▂⌇
that night in japan, for the first time in six years since you saw sana, you were able to kiss her again, to feel her bare skin against yours, to taste her as she writhed and cried out your name above you.
you woke up before her the next day, sun sluggishly making its way past the horizon. you watched as her breaths came in and out, soft, her expression at peace, not clouded with anger or sadness at you. you traced the lines of her face, recollecting every single hair, every mole, every perfection and imperfection on her, so she'd always be with you in your memory.
she stirred after a while, blinking softly and you wait for her to come to, fingers tracing soft lines over her side.
you feel her freeze under you, breathing picking up, just barely noticeable but you were sharing the same airspace. her eyes meet yours for the first time that morning and you're committing the brown irises to memory now as well.
"you didn't leave." her voice is laced with morning fatigue.
you only hum in response, continuing to trace random shapes into her skin.
"why?"
you take a moment to think about your answer. years ago, you would've been terrified with the idea that someone would've found out about the two of you. that someone would know your dirty little secret. and that secret was that you were in love with your best friend. it was different for sana. sana was flamboyant, and proud, and happy. it wouldn't matter who sana liked because that didn't take away from her personality. she was still valuable as a person. you weren't like that though. you were always just sana's best friend or danny's girlfriend or frank's girlfriend or whoever else you dated at the time. the moment you deviated from that, a new label would be stuck on you, and people would pity sana, talk about how she could do so much better, how you were a witch who lured sana in. so you were selfish. you took from sana, and you never gave back. because sana was perfect in your mind, and she didn't need anything else.
"i'm sorry. there's a lot to be sorry for and a lot i need to make up to you. but at the core of it all, i love you sana. these six years without you have been hell. and i'm sorry it took that long for me to realise this, but i love you, not frank, not anyone else, just you."
you feel your eyes begin to tear up, heavy with emotions, sana's mirroring you, her bottom lip slightly quivering.
"what happened with frank?" her voice is a little shaky.
"we fought. i didn't want to deal with him anymore, my feet took me to the airport, and i ended up here."
sana sighs then, turning away from you and lying on her back. "so you're still together?"
"well... i- no but-"
"how is this time any different then y/n?"
"i- i- it's over, me and him. seeing you again has affirmed that for me. there hasn't been love between frank and i for a long time. i never loved him the way i love you. i'm ending things as soon as i get back. i promise sana. please- please believe me." you're scrambling a little, you couldn't afford to lose sana again. not after you had just gotten her back.
you can see tears running down the side of her face. you hate yourself for making her cry. that seems to be all you ever made her do.
"okay."
"okay?"
she turns to you again, wiping at her eyes, "okay. i really shouldn't but i love you too much and i've missed you too much to say no."
"really?" your perking up, disbelief clear.
"you keep asking me that and i'll change my mind." she teases, smiling for the first time.
you're overjoyed. rolling onto her and sweeping her up in a kiss, hoping your actions convey your feelings for her better than your words do. she's laughing into you and god have you missed that sound. you attack her sides immediately, almost desperate to hear it again, to make her feel something other than the sadness you've caused her. you make a promise to yourself in that moment, that you'd never, never make sana cry again.
it took you only a month to break that promise.
▂▂⌇
"hi, frank's wife right?"
you resist the very strong urge to roll your eyes, instead nodding politely and listening as the woman who approached you launches into a conversation about her husband and how he and frank got along at work and really you couldn't care less.
you were at the work event frank had mentioned in the morning. he did end up picking up his own dry cleaning and you saw him briefly at the event when you first showed up, only saying a quick hello and kissing your cheek before he was off again mingling and entertaining guests.
you had intended on just sticking to the bar and making use of the free-flow alcohol but now this woman was talking to you about her kids, and whatever else and you really just want to throw your drink in her face and yell at her about how to read a room.
you spot frank in the corner of your eye, surrounded by a group of women. you knew he had slept with other people ever since you stopped accepting his advances and affection. you're honestly surprised he hasn't asked for a divorce yet.
but frank was kinder than you. you were still his friend before you were his wife. he still cared about you and didn't want you to be left alone. you couldn't seem to convince him you were fine alone. you learnt to be fine when sana left. although lately, even he seemed to see you less as a friend and more and more, just as his wife.
▂▂⌇
"i still can't believe that time you thought danny was a good choice for you. and you defended him too!" sana was laughing, slapping your arm playfully.
you whine in response, "i told you i was sorry for that alright!!"
she's still laughing when frank comes back to the two of you, looking at you inquisitively and gesturing vaguely towards sana. you shrug, helping him set the food he had ordered for the three of you on the table.
"what's funny sana?" he asks, sliding into the booth with you and picking up a burger.
sana's waving a chip around now, pointing at you, "just talking about y/n's shitty taste in men."
frank fakes shock, looking at you with an exaggerated look of hurt, "me?"
you laugh, hitting him lightly, "not you dummy."
"yeah you're one of the good ones franky. probably the only good one out there."
"aww thanks sana."
sana grins, digging into her food.
you smile at the two of them. your two favourite people in the world. when you first met frank, you were skeptical of him. you were sure he was only trying to be friends with you to get with sana. so imagine your surprise when he had actually been plotting with sana behind your back to ask you out. you had said yes of course, he was a sweet guy, attractive too, and most importantly, sana liked him.
you ended up hitting it off, and the three of you were almost inseparable after that.
it wasn't until about 7 months into your relationship that sana started distancing herself. she would say she was busy, turn down more offers to go out, start hanging around a new group of people.
you heard from frank later that they had some sort of disagreement, which was why sana had started avoiding you. you were hurt by this though, because sana was still your friend. she was yours before you were frank's, and even when you were frank's you were still hers. didn't she know that? she had to.
you intended for her to know that when you cornered her, a late afternoon on a friday when the three of you used to go out for ice-cream as a reward for the week's end, but she had been staying behind to study or always had something else on instead.
"why are you avoiding me?"
sana's eyes are everywhere, her movements skittish as she tries to look for an escape before giving up and huffing. "i don't know what you're talking about."
"yes you do."
"no i don't."
"stop this sana. frank told me the two of you fought. if you don't want to be around him fine. that's your choice. but that doesn't mean you get to avoid me too."
she looks at you then, eyes fiery, "is that what he told you?"
you nod, "i don't understand sana. i don't care that you fought. i can seperate us and my relationship with frank. you're still my best friend."
"we fought because he told me he felt like i was stealing you from him."
"what?"
"yeah. he said he never got to spend any time with you. i was always there. he felt like he was the one who was third-wheeling our relationship."
the words third-wheel and our relationship swim around in your mind, "w-what? that's impossible!"
"is it really though y/n?" sana's voice is soft now.
"what do you mean?"
"i mean, is it really impossible for you to see us that way? frank obviously did, and he felt threatened by that."
"w-what- sana what are you talking about?"
she sighs a little in frustration, and then suddenly she's yanking you forward by the collar and planting her lips against yours. you react automatically, kissing her back, hands immediately going to her waist as you revel in the feeling of her soft lips against yours. it was always so different kissing sana compared to all the other guys you've been with. you chalked it up to the fact that sana took care of her skin, her lips, the way she smelled, all of that made kissing her that much sweeter.
but then you remember frank and you're pulling away, breaths heavier than they were mere seconds ago. "what the fuck sana?!" you're whipping your head around, looking to see if anyone had seen the two of you. it seemed to be clear.
sana's chuckling lowly, wiping at her lips, face downcast.
"what were you thinking?! i'm with frank! you set me up with frank!"
her eyes meet yours again, and you're taken back by the glassy look on her face. she's whispering, "i know. i know and i hate myself for it. i thought- i thought if- i thought i could get over this if i saw you happy with someone else. and then you were! and i just felt worse y/n. and then frank could tell and that was the last straw i guess. i needed to be away, away from you so i could get make these stupid feelings go away. i'm sorry y/n i'm so so sorry."
you're dumbfounded, staring at her blankly when she starts sobbing, hands coming to wipe at tears falling faster than she could catch them.
you don't understand what this means, what you felt, all you knew in that moment was sana was crying. the person you cared about most in the world was crying and you were the reason for it. so you do the one thing to make her stop. you tilt her chin up, heart breaking at the sniffles and the watery eyes, and you press your lips against hers again.
you end up where you've ended up so many times. legs entangled, sweaty bodies on sheets, heavy breathing, and minds lost.
▂▂⌇
you couldn't stand being inside anymore. it was suffocating.
you breathe out smoke as you exhale, the cigarette end still burning.
you watch as someone makes their way outside, shuffling around a little in their pockets and cursing when they realise they don't have a lighter.
the person looks towards you and you hold out yours. you help them light the end of their cigarette and nod when they mutter their thanks, inhaling the smoke into their lungs and standing awkwardly to the side.
it's a few minutes here in the cold, and you're almost finished your cigarette, about to throw it away when the stranger speaks up.
"do i know you from somewhere?"
you pause, looking back, you don't think you recognise this person. "you must have me confused for someone else, i'm sorry."
"wait... no you're sana's best friend right!?"
you drop the cigarette in your hand in shock. it had been a long time since someone had said that name out loud. she only ever lived in your head, it was hard to believe she was someone to other people too.
"right yes of course i remember now! i'm momo i was sana's roommate in college. although you probably don't remember i think we only really met like once. sana was always with you around campus and posted you a lot though so i remember you."
you vaguely recall the woman as she chatters away excitedly.
"right... momo... it's nice to meet you. i'm y/n."
momo grins, "have you spoken to sana lately? i don't think i saw you at the wedding, although i may have just been drunk." she chuckles a little at herself, not realising the way your face drops.
"wedding?"
momo looks at you a little in confusion, "yeah. last month? sana got married in sapporo."
your head is spinning with the new information. sana was married?
“woah you feeling okay?” momo’s reaching out for your shoulder, steadying you. you didn’t even realise you had lost your balance.
“i-i- yeah sorry.”
“you sure? are you here with anyone? anyone i can call?”
“no. it’s okay, thank you though.”
“yeah no problem.”
she’s shuffling back again, sucking on her cigarette.
“sana and i haven’t spoken in years. i was just a little surprised is all.” you speak up when you feel a little steadier on your feet.
“oh shit! i’m so sorry y/n i had no idea!”
“it’s okay, it seems no one really does.” you laugh a little bitterly.
momo doesn’t know how to respond to this, flicking her eyes between you and the door.
“it’s fine though. i’m happy for her.” the words taste vile on your tongue. is this what sana felt when she watched you walk down the aisle on your wedding day?
momo softens a little, “she is happy.” she offers you a kind smile, tapping out her cigarette and mumbling a quick thanks before heading back inside.
once you're sure she's gone you let yourself break down. sobs wrack your body as you hold your hands over your mouth trying to quiet them. you can barely see through the tears streaming out of your eyes. this was it. you'd finally lost her. you couldn't cling to the delusion that somewhere out there, some of her still belonged to you, some of her happiness, her memories, her love. you'd lost all of that now.
▂▂⌇
"what was that y/n?"
"what?"
"don't fuck with me right now. that was frank wasn't it? on the phone just then?"
you sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose, "what do you want me to say sana?"
"that you're keeping your promise. that you're going to return to him, break up with him, and then you're going to come back here to me. and then we can finally start our lives together."
"it's not that easy sana."
she explodes, "what do you mean?! it is that easy y/n! you told me when you came here that you and frank were over. have been for years. and now you can't tell me that same thing?"
"i don't- no sana-"
"what? what y/n? what’s your excuse now? do you have to make sure your job is secure? after you've spent a whole fucking month here you expect me to think you still care about that? do you have a child with him? is that it? is he sick? what other possible excuse is there for 'it's not that easy sana'?!"
"you don't get it! you can't say that to me sana!"
"what?! what don't i get?! tell me y/n, let's sort this shit out right fucking now. tell me why you can't be with me."
"it's not- that's just the way i am sana! i can't-"
"you told me you loved me. was that a lie then?" her eyes are brimming with tears, anger evident and your heart breaks again. you promised, you promised her and you promised yourself that this wouldn't happen again.
you're quick to step in again, trying to stop her from crying the one way you know how, brushing her cheeks with your thumbs and kissing her.
she doesn't let you get away with it this time though. she rips away from you, placing a hand on your chest and pushing you back lightly, keeping you literally at arm's length.
"don't do that." she's chuckling, her laughs mixed in with quiet sobs, "don't think you can just kiss away your problems. that's not how real life works y/n."
"please sana, please just-"
"what? you want me to be okay being your secret again? you want to be able to go around in public with frank only to come home to me? you can't have both y/n! i'm not going to do that again for you!"
you’re both crying now, standing across from each other in sana’s apartment, a place that’s felt more like home to you in a month than your place with frank has felt for you in six years.
your voice comes out in a hoarse whisper when you speak up, “i can’t- i can’t feel like this sana.”
sana’s wiping at her eyes with the sleeve of her sweater. then she’s turning on her heel and heading into the bedroom.
you follow her, you’d follow her anywhere, but your heart sinks when you realise she’s going around the room picking up your belongings and shoving them into your bag.
“w-wait s-sana, what- what are you doing? stop please-“
you’re almost begging, scrambling after her trying to pull her back but she’s stubborn, she’s able to fill the bag within a minute and then she’s pushing it into you, and out the door.
“please! sana please i can’t lose you again don’t do this please- you’re my best friend sana.”
she’s managed to successfully push you out the front door now, still crying. “but you’re not mine y/n. you were never my best friend. you were always the love of my life. and you can’t be that for me anymore. so leave. please. don’t try and find me again.”
“n-no sana please d-don’t-“
“you’d have to stop the world just to stop what you feel for me y/n. but you don’t realise that. and i’m sick of loving someone who can’t give me all of that love back.”
and then she’s slamming her door shut in your face, the both of you sobbing on opposite sides of the door, hearts shattered a second time, and later, when it happens a third time, it’s only the sound of yours breaking.
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dr-felitas · 3 days
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cellphone love story — osamu dazai
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*+゚synopsis: recently, someone's been spam calling you to the point that you’re fed and pick up the phone, only to be greeted with someone by the name dazai who has been continuously trying to reach his dead friend. the calls however don't end here, rather, your (call) history with dazai starts to extend - slowly but surely forming a bond over time; the phone.
pairing: dazai x reader (gn) |wordcount: 2.5k (this was my personal hell)  | content & warnings: fluff, mentions of odasaku and very very very small mention of chuuya, more than friends less than lovers at the end (can also be interpreted as lovers, but that's just what i had in mind yall), brief mentions of drinking, light angst if you squint, not proofread its 5 am yall…. ; oneshot
a/n: sorry that i havent posted anything in the past few days (eight days to be exact i think..) i hope this will somehow make it up :,)
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you can't keep count anymore.
this is the third - no, maybe fourth time today the unknown number has called you. at some point they have to realize that they’ve gotten the wrong number, right? 
it all started about one and a half weeks ago when you changed your phone number and received a new one. ever since that day someone has been continuously trying to call you. unfamiliar digits lit up on your screen as you were out with your friend, you ignored them, after all who were you to accept a call from an unknown number?
but, over the course of the evening the calls didn't stop, eerie and annoying ringtone constantly piercing through your ears until the calls took a halt at midnight. relief washing over you.
to your mishap the calls didn't stop there. sometimes they’d wake you up from a peaceful slumber, groggily pinching and rubbing your eyes before swiping the call away. other times your phone would ring at a work meeting where you had to awkwardly excuse yourself and turn off your phone.
admittedly, you're at fault for not blocking the number. all of your friends suggested that you should, reasoning it with the fact that the caller probably has some dirty schemes and motives and that you should just try and not get in touch with weird people like them. 
which brings you to your current predicament, sitting on the couch with your favorite show playing in the background as you text a friend, until a certain but familiar series of digits show up on your phone screen. do they never know when to stop?
your fingers hover over the decline button and then over to the accept button, debating and contemplating if you should decline the call but you don’t. the pads of your fingers press down on the accept button and you wait. 
you’re greeted with silence, what the hell? your patience runs thin, streaming like arid sand grains through an hourglass until they meet the bottom and gather there together with the others. it's been like thirty seconds into the call now, at this point they should've probably said something, at least a quiet hello. an exasperated sigh leaves your mouth and you begin “seriously? you’ve been calling me for the past week now and suddenly i pick up your calls you don’t say shit?” you complain.
“goodbye odasaku.” a sigh leaves the strangers mouth, a man you notice. “i suppose this is my sign to stop grieving and mourning over you.” his voice slightly quivers and the male chuckles sorrowfully. you can’t distinguish if it’s melancholy or relief that lace the bitter words. 
you’re left with confusion, so many unanswered questions lie at the tip of your tongue but you don’t dare to utter a word. “apologies.” he speaks up once again, this time with a steadier voice. “you’re probably confused, my name is osamu dazai.” he politely introduces himself. even though you’re unable to see him and can’t see him nor his expression, your intuition tells you that he’s slightly grinning, that a ghost of a smile graces his lips, although a rather sad one. 
“this phone number belonged to an old friend of mine.” dazai respires. a shaky “odasaku?” you whisper and let out a breath you yourself didn’t know you held in. “yeah, sakunosuke oda.” he hummed smilingly. “he’s gone.” dead, dazai wants to add but he refrains. 
“his voicemail always played when i dialed his number and called.” he whispered. “it was pleasant to hear his voice, knowing that there are still fragments of odasaku out there. he understood me like no other, i miss him.” dazai meekly confessed in a hushed tone. “but those days are over, i suppose it’s for the better.” the male on the other line sighed.
an umpteen amount of words prickle on your tongue, they itch to be released and said, you wanted to say something - anything. but before you’re able to properly gather your words and form a sentence, dazai cuts you off.
“please excuse my intrusions in the past week. have a good rest.” a shrilling sound echoing through your living room symbolizes the end of the call and you’re left dumbfounded.
-
strident noises awake you from your sleep. you toss and turn in your sheets as you mindlessly try to find your phone, rolling over to lay on your side as you find it and tightly clutching it, gripping your phone as you’re greeted with a bright screen and a row of digits. dazais number, you realize.
no, you didn't save his number nor did you memorize in which order the digits were aligned but his phone number's unfamiliar digits have become quite familiar now. you check the time: 0.52 a.m. what was dazai doing at such time and why was he calling you out of all people? especially after he hung up on you a month ago.
“hello?” you groggily yawn. “ah.” a female voice on the other line yelps, she sounds relieved. “are you odasaku by any chance? could you pick up mr. dazai please?” the woman asks in a demure manner. “what’s the situation?” you rub your eyes, trying to stay awake. “well, mr. dazai is intoxicated - he’s drunk and is currently slumped over the counter.” she whispers into the phone. 
“if that doesn’t bother you of course, i can also call someone else!” she hurriedly says. you're slipping out of your sheets to get out of your bed and move towards your hallway, loosely throwing over a thin jacket and checking its pocket if your car keys are in there. “it’s fine, can you tell me the location?” you tiredly ask. “yes of course. it’s bar lupin.” she replies. you check your phone and step outside your door moving towards your car “got it, i’ll be there in 20 minutes or so.” with that you end the call, get inside your car and put your hands on the steering wheel.
-
carefully you take a step inside the narrow bar, taking off your hood and immediately spotting dazai whose head was currently laying on the surface of the front bar. he was poking at his glass of whiskey, the ball of ice being almost fully melted. “dazai.” you call out. he turns around, hazel eyes meeting yours. 
only then can you admire dazai for the first time. his dark brown is tousled and unkempt but it continues to gleam in the orange light. his arms are wrapped in bandages and there's a long beige, almost khaki, coat draped over his body. you can’t help but think that he’s kind of pretty.
“what are you doing here?” dazai asks in a fatigued tone. you show him your car keys and wag them in the air “here to pick you up.” you reply nonchalantly. “why?” his question is barely above a whisper. 
why are you helping him? he doesn’t understand - he wishes to understand. the first impression you’ve received from dazai was when he was calling you non stop and now your second impression is him slumped over bar lupins front bar. dazai can’t tell if you’re just naive or really trying to be helpful out of politeness or rather out of kindness. 
a certain kindness he’s only ever received from odasaku. helping someone like him out of kindness with no hidden intentions, offering a helping hand, smiling with utmost fondness. 
“as if im leaving a somewhat nice drunkard alone. i’m not inhumane.” even though your answers are full of nonchalance, dazai can make out a certain sincerity that lies in your words. 
his eyes can only follow as you tilt your head towards the door. “let's get you back home.” you gently smile. 
-
dazai wakes up to the sound of  birds chirping and sizzling oil. he’s warm, a soft blanket covering his body only then dazai realizes that this isn’t his bed, that he’s not lying in his futon. he looks around before his gaze lands on the bedside table which had a glass of water atop it, marked with a little sticky note that said “drink this, you’ll feel much better and come find me in the kitchen :)” 
he can’t recall everything that happened yesterday, it all went past him like a blur the only thing he remembered was that you came to pick him up. dazai grabbed the glass and gulped it down in one go, some of its content seeping down his chin and wiping it away with his sleeve before sliding out of the bed with the glass in his hand to return it to you.
finding your kitchen wasn’t hard, it was located right next to the dining room where a variety of dishes were placed on the dining table. dazai enters the kitchen, without you noticing and sees you whisking up two eggs with a pair of chopsticks before speaking up “here.” dazai coughs and places the glass on the counter near the sink to express his gratitude. 
“oh, it’s no problem.” you shoot him a small smile. your hand reaches over to the salt and pepper  to season the eggs with before carefully putting the egg mixture into the hot greased pan. admittedly dazai feels a bit out of place - useless (when was he ever not) so he offers to wash your dishes which you happily agreed to. 
besides the sound of sizzling fat and water running down the faucet, it's quiet in your kitchen. “how’d she know whom to call?”  you’re the first to speak up, eyes still concentrated on frying the eggs as you hum a small melody.
“the bartendress?” dazai asks in response. 
“yeah.” 
“well, odasaku’s number, which is your number now, is one of my emergency contacts, i suppose she just called you first.” dazai shrugs his shoulders, his hands still focused on rubbing away the dirty spots on your plates. 
“i see.” 
“if the old man, my favourite bartender by the way." dazai winks. "if he would’ve been here he would’ve called mackerel.” dazai lets out a small laugh, probably the most sincere laugh he let out in the past few weeks.
“mackerel?” you ask, soft voice laced with confusion.
“an old friend of mine.” dazai smiles sadly. “odasaku and him are both my emergency contacts.” he chuckles. 
dazai doesn’t talk about the topic much further and neither do you, assuming it’s a sensitive topic for him. “i’m done, how about you?” you look over to dazai who’s currently washing his hands off with lavender soap. “mhm, me too.” he hums in agreement at which you can smile at.
dazais eyes trail after you as you leave the kitchen and move to the dining room, setting down all the plates and pouring two glasses of water. “sit down and eat up.” your eyes sway from his eyes over to the chairs. only then does dazai notice that his beige coat is neatly folded on one of your dining chairs. it makes his heart jump lightly. 
he sits down and takes a sip out of his glass, waiting until you start to eat first before he gets to. he smiles contently as you happily chew on your food. “does it taste good?” he cringes at himself when he realizes just how awkward that question is, he feels like a teenager again that was always wary of what people thought of him. 
“it tastes amazing! wanna try?” you slide the plate over to dazai, offering him to take a piece. “sure.” he agrees before taking a small bite. you weren’t lying when you said that it tasted amazing. “you're right, it tastes so good.” dazai says ecstatically. “told you so! my cooking is not to be underestimated.” you laugh and dazai can’t help but laugh too which makes him cough uncontrollably, putting a hand over his mouth so he doesn’t spit out anything on your table cloth but continuing to laugh.
“oh god dazai, are you okay?” you rush over to his aid and put your hand over his back to slide over it, hoping that it’ll somehow soothe his coughing. dazai manages to muffle out a “i’m fine, really.” between his coughs and laughs which you can only sigh at but can’t help the smile that finds its way onto your face and plasters itself on your lips.
-
calls with dazai have become more frequent now, although he sometimes still remains a mystery to you, it feels like he’s grown quite comfortable around you. 
he told you more about himself (vice versa), talks about his work at the armed detective agency and sends you recipes the both of you could recreate. not only calls with him became more frequent but also visits. 
at least four out of seven times a week dazai rushes to your place after work (you should probably call it your shared home now due to dazai leaving his stuff at your place like scattered objects on the floor).
for example, today: dazai walks into your kitchen like he owns the place. he sets down his belongings onto your couch before stepping towards the kitchen where he already finds you chopping the vegetables for the curry. 
he notices that you’re on the verge of tearing up as you continuously chop the onions into small bits and grabs a tissue before sneaking up behind you and scaring you. “boo.” his mouth forms a little “o” and you slightly jump before setting the knife down and putting your hand over your heart. “you scared me!” you complain even though dazai can see the playful glint in your eyes.
“sorry, sorry.” he laughs before wiping away the small droplets of tears that managed to escape your eyes. 
his calloused hands brush over your soft skin, it’s intimate - romantic even. you softly sigh against the tissue, the object that separates the two of you. the action makes your face lightly heat up and you’re sure that dazai noticed it too from the way he’s smirking. 
“aw, was i able to fluster you?” he coos at you smilingly, which in response you can only huff at, eyeing him with a look that says “you already know the answer.” before turning around to continue where you left off.
in the meantime dazai pulls out another cutting board and starts to chop the carrots. it’s quiet, it’s always quiet when the two of you cook together, but neither you nor dazai mind. the smell of aromatics that nip and continue to linger in the air and the sound of your jazz playlist which sometimes gets outplayed by the sounds of cutting or frying food, are more than enough. it’s just like the first time the two of you shared this space together, a certain nostalgia suddenly washing over him.
“thank you” he whispers, barely loud enough to not get overplayed by the music playing in the background. 
“for what?” you ask, longing for an answer.
for the times you’ve picked me up at bar lupin, for the times you’ve cooked me warm meals, for the times when you took care of me. 
“for everything.”
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this is dedicated to my odasaku person @azullumi (don't die pls i need u and ur fics HHDDISISISIS). you've always told me that you liked odasaku a lot and that some day you also want to open up an orphanage which i find really endearing. what i mean by "you're my odasaku person" is not "wow we're literally so odasaku and dazai coded" but no rather it's because you also play such a major role in my life (not just cause of the age gap between oda and dazai and u and me..). you're always there when i need you, you're always there when i needed you and i hope that you'll always be there when i need you. but the same thing goes vice versa; goes for me. azul you're someone whom i've randomly met and if i never made that one comment or sent that one ask or if you never sent that one dm i would've never written this. you're someone who reassures me and soothes my worries with simple words, when i'm feeling down you're the person i turn to because you're the only person who really understands and somehow relates and thus i'm always able to trust and follow your judgement and advice. i never feel judged or belittled by you or treated as someone whose only an immature kid, no you treat me as a normal person, like a friend. which makes me feel seen - acknowledged even. to be loved is to be seen. i could go hours when it comes about talking to you and what impact you have on my life, but i suppose that's for another end note dsjsdsuusus. you're so dear to me. i love you a lot azul <3
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© TOORURS 2024. stealing, copying, translating, reposting my works on other platforms, feeding them to ai is not permitted.
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tkwrites · 3 days
Text
Please - Quinn Hughes x ofc
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gif by 40ep
Title: Please
Author: Tory / @tkwrites 
Relationship: Pre-established: Quinn Hughes x Sarah Roberts
Summary: After they finally move in together, Sarah follows through with Quinn's request for her to edge him.
Warnings: smut (18+ only), unprotected sex (wrap it up unless you're in a consenting relationship!) p in v, fingering (f receiving), oral (m and f receiving), edging, orgasm denial, slight domination, sub Quinn
Word count: 2,600
Comments: The idea for this came to me in the wee morning about two weeks ago. I started writing right away, and it kind of took on a life of its own. It's beyond smutty and a little outside my usual wheelhouse and comfort zone. All the same, I hope you enjoy! If you do, please let me know by commenting, reblogging, or sending in an ask! Your feedback gives me so much inspiration to keep writing.
Please
A Quinn & Sarah Snapshot
“Sarah,” Quinn begged, “Sarah, please.” 
She ignored him, continuing to trace her mouth over his left thigh. 
A moan that was thoroughly pornographic — laced with frustration and desire — left his mouth. 
“Sarah,” he said again, hips shifting up. 
He was going to die. She was going to kill him if he didn’t get some relief. 
Looking past his hard, weeping member, she found him flushed and sweaty, mouth contorted into a sort of pleasured grimace as he held on for her. 
A pang of guilt twisted her stomach before she reminded herself he wanted this. 
Still, she decided, it had been enough. 
She was moving. Thank god, she was moving. Her stomach brushed against his cock as she crawled over him, and he breathed a deep sigh. It wasn’t as good as her mouth or her core, but at this point, anything touching, anything garnering even a little bit of relief was better than nothing. 
Her mouth dipped to his neck, and he whimpered, gripping the silk ties to keep himself from rutting against her. He’d made that mistake earlier in the night, and it had resulted in a sharp admonition, a disappointed look, and caused her to not put her mouth on him again until he’d made her come another time. 
The memory of it made him tremble. “Sarah, please.”
She pulled away, looking into his face as she swept his sweaty hair back. “Please what?” she asked innocently. 
“Can I come? Please?” 
A soft smile spread over her lips, and hope ignited inside him. 
It wavered when she paused, a thoughtful look on her face. 
“I don’t know,” she said, finally. 
He didn’t know how much longer he could possibly last. 
When he’d asked her for this, he hadn’t expected…well he wasn’t totally sure what he’d expected. He certainly hadn’t expected her to slide into the part so easily. Sarah could be sassy, but it wasn’t her usual way of being. He couldn’t deny that seeing her this way brought out a heavy, thick desire in him he’d never experienced. 
He’d never been edged before, never dominated like this, but he’d thought about it so often in their many weeks apart that summer. This fantasy of her in charge made its way into the regular rotation when he was missing her. When he finally moved back and she finally moved in, he asked her for it, the prospect that it could become a reality too consuming to resist.
Now that it was really happening, he had no idea where all his restraint was coming from. He supposed all the conditioning for hockey probably played a role. 
“Do you think you deserve it?” 
He nodded fervently. 
“Tell me.” 
“I’ve been good,” he said, voice even more husky. 
“You have been very good,” she consented but didn’t do or say anything else. 
He would have to plead his case. “I made you come so many times.”
“How many?” she asked, mouth dangerously close to his ear. 
The lustful haze surrounding his brain made it hard for him to think. He couldn’t forget how close her skin was to his, how hot her breath felt on his cheek. 
“How many, Quinn?” she repeated as her tongue trailed from the bottom of his ear to the bottom of his neck. A streak of fire whipped down his spine. 
The first time had been on his cock right at the beginning of the night. She’d tied his wrists to the bed, one near each corner, with two swaths of silk she seemed to produce out of thin air. She then climbed on top of him, lubed him up and sunk onto him without any kind of preamble. 
He had thought watching her ride him without being able to touch her — forced to watch her slip and circle her own fingers over her clit — while holding himself back as she fluttered around him, squeezing him within an inch of his life, was torture. 
It turned out he had no idea what was to come. 
A short while after that was the rutting incident. He’d almost shot off, slicking himself through her soft, smooth center as she kissed his neck torturously slow. The pleasured noise that left his throat couldn’t be stopped, and she’d darted away with a rebuke before he could actually come.
As his penance, she’d untied his right hand so he could get her off as she knelt next to him, knees spread wide so he could see her glistening core take his fingers so well. Watching her come undone, head thrown back, one arm behind to hold herself up while the other hand massaged her own nipples, he swore he could have come right along with her without her even touching him. 
His train of thought was interrupted as the palm of her hand slipped over the front of his hip, trailing a soft touch by the base of his shaft. His whole body twitched.
“How many?” she repeated.
Pride washed over him, remembering the way he had brought her to climax before she tied his hand down again. He’d begged her to clean his fingers, desperate to taste her. Instead, she’d hovered over him so he could drink her nectar straight from the source. He’d thrust his tongue into her and felt like he might just waste away if he didn’t get his dick in her soon. 
How long ago had that been? It felt like hours. 
“Three,” he gasped. 
Sarah could practically see his thoughts as the fascinated, hungry expression he wore when he watched her come ghosted over Quinn’s beautiful face.
“You’re sure?” 
He nodded fervently. There had been at least three. He forced his mind into coherent memory, trying to decipher if he’d fantasized one of them. 
“I could have sworn it was four.” 
“You would know better,” he conceded quickly. Maybe he’d missed one, too concentrated on not coming himself. 
She hummed, looking him over as she trailed a hand up his chest. His skin had taken on the most beautiful pink flush in the hazy light filtering through the rain splattered windows. His chest rose and fell in steep little jerks. He really was rock hard, pre-come dripping and dribbling onto his pelvis, sweaty and slick. 
Despite being tied down for so long, he still resisted the restraints, pulling the silk taut before fatigue would set into his arms, and he had to rest for a moment. It was as if he couldn’t help himself. Like the desire to touch her was just too strong. As he went through this routine again, dropping back to the mattress panting, she decided it had been long enough. 
“You’re such a good boy, Quinn.” 
She’d never imagined those words coming out of her mouth, but when he told her he liked it as they started talking about this whole edging idea, she’d found them easier and easier to say. Especially after seeing the pride and pleasure that took over his face each time they left her lips. 
He whined and nodded his agreement. 
“I think you’ve earned some relief,” she said. 
Thank god. His chest caved in a deep sigh. Oh, thank God.
“Do you want my mouth?” 
He nodded. 
“Or my pussy?” 
He nodded again, biting his lip as if the very idea of having her wrapped around him was bringing him too close to the edge. 
“You can’t come in both.”
He’d been hard so long, it felt like he might just stiffen right back up so he could. If only. 
On second thought, that might actually kill him.
“M-mouth first,” he finally managed to say, “but I want to come inside you.”
“Okay,” she agreed, “Okay.” 
She shifted back to kneel between his legs, and he ventured to ask, “will you untie me?” 
“Not yet,” she said before fastening her hot mouth to him. 
She sucked the pre-come off his shaft, her tongue flat against him in long, slow strokes, savoring the taste. 
A groan rang through the room, loud, earnest, and laced with relief and gratitude. 
When she took him deep and his hips jumped, she didn’t even admonish him. He’d earned a little bad behavior. He’d been so patient. 
She worked back to his tip, suction and tongue so intense it felt like she might just suck the very life out of him. God, if he could, he would let go in her mouth right then.
His eyes rolled back, lashes fluttering when she pulled off him with an audible pop. Restraint he didn’t know he had somehow held him back from coming.
She straddled him. He felt beyond grateful. Beyond turned on. Beyond anything he’d ever felt in his life. He felt like his skin might just melt off, it was so hot. 
Forcing his eyes to stay open, he watched her lower herself onto him, watched himself disappear into her tight heat, watched her mouth fall open in a silent scream. 
He was already pulsing. Or maybe that was her. It was hard to tell whose body was whose when they were fused together this way. 
She leaned forward to work the tie on his left wrist undone. 
Taking advantage of her position, he sucked one of her nipples into his mouth, relishing the shiver that ran through her, right to her core. If he got enough pleasure flowing through her veins, she would come faster, and he wouldn’t have to hold on as long. 
She sat back up, shifting him a little deeper.
His eyes rolled back. “Sarah, please —” 
“Just one more time,” she whispered. “As soon as I come, you can.”  
Sarah was already so sensitive. Too sensitive, really, to be taking him again. She hadn’t planned on coming four times. She hadn’t really planned on anything other than teasing him, but it became obvious how much he enjoyed watching her come as he held himself back. So she’d come. Once on his cock, and twice on his fingers. She’d planned to be done then, thinking she’d suck him off as a finale, but the way he’d fought to get his fingers to his mouth, begging to taste her, made desire ripple to life in her once more. 
Taking advantage of his prone state to fulfill a fantasy of her own, she lowered her center to his mouth. As his tongue thrust into her, the bridge of his lovely nose had pressed against her clit, bringing her to a climax that was beyond anything she’d experienced. 
Now, his length was inside her again, rigid and twitching. Electricity shivered through her, walking a thin line between pleasure and pain. 
“Quinn,” she breathed. 
He moaned. 
“Quinn, you need to be really gentle.”
His head jerked in a nod. “What do you want?” he rasped. 
God, his voice lit her on fire. How could this much desire be coursing through her again? “Make me come, Quinn.” 
“Fuck,” he breathed reverently.
She’d only untied his left hand. He was glad to have it below his head, but it felt like a useless tool. He fumbled, trying to make the non-dominant, blood starved fingers work the way he wanted them to. Winding to the apex of her thighs. He ghosted his thumb over her, barely touching. 
“Oh,” she moaned. 
Once he found the right spot, on the sensitive underside of her clit, he rested the pad of his thumb there, providing direct, gentle pressure she could move against. Her eyes rolled back and she flexed around him. He devoured the pleasure that rolled across her face. 
Just a little while longer, he told himself. Just a few more seconds. Then, a few more after that.
“Fuck me, that feels so good, Quinn.” 
God, he wanted to be the only one who got to fuck her for the rest of his life. 
It didn’t take long. She was so sensitive and so turned on from the whole night that it felt like he just needed to flip a switch, and she was coming undone again. The look he was giving her: loving, lustful, and proud was the final catalyst, sending her careening over the edge.
As soon as she constricted around him twice, he was gone. Done for. 
Shouting his pleasure, he came harder than he ever had in his life. His whole body tensed, hips thrust up, desperate to get more of himself inside her. 
“Quinn,” she moaned. “Oh, yes.” 
She collapsed on top of him.
Feeling the release of his orgasm unknot his muscles, he tried to catch his breath. It was a good thing he didn’t have practice the next day. He would need time to recover from this. 
A while later (time had lost its importance) she pushed herself up, hands on either side of his shoulders. 
He whined but didn’t try to stop her as she lifted her hips. 
They both hissed at the loss. 
Before slipping off the bed to clean up, she leaned over and undid the other tie. Smoothing her thumb over the soft inside of his wrist, she murmured, “you did so good. You were so good to me, Quinn.” 
He made a pleased little noise. 
She slipped off the bed, going to the bathroom and cleaning herself up before coming back to him with a glass of water. By that time, he’d recovered enough to sit up against the headboard.
“Do you want to take a shower?” she asked.
How could she think about something so mundane? He was busy trying to relive the entire evening. He gulped the water and thought about her noises, the way she felt. 
Remembering it made him twitch with desire. It wasn’t too surprising when it hurt a bit.
Once he took a deep breath and let it out again, mirroring the same thing he did after winding down from a game, Sarah knew he was ready to talk. 
“Do you want to shower?” she repeated. 
He should, but his legs felt like lead. Screwing up his determination, he gulped the last of the water before nodding. 
“Did I do okay?” she asked as he slipped to the edge of the bed, his hand trailing over one of the silk ties. 
His eyes darted to hers, worried she somehow thought different. “You were perfect.” 
And she had been. Bossy and assertive, but her same loving tenderness was still there, under all that. She was still Sarah, she’d just put on a costume for the night.
Once the water was warmed up, she pulled him into the shower with her.
He let her soap him up, loving her gentle caresses with her loofah. She was even using her vanilla soap, and the smell surrounded them, replacing the sweaty, musky smell of sex with the lighter, sweeter fragrance he associated so much with her. 
When she moved on to washing his hair, he practically moaned as his fatigued legs shook. “You’re going to put me to sleep,” he murmured. 
Sarah giggled and continued scratching her nails over his scalp. 
He rinsed off and took over the loofah to soap her up, carefully memorizing the contours of her body. 
Finally out of the shower, they did the after shower things, and Quinn helped Sarah replace the sheets. 
Settling back into the soft bed, Sarah asked, “Do you feel okay?” 
“Never better,” he said, a dopey little smile taking over his face.
She pressed a kiss to his forehead, pulled the blankets up, and brought him against her for a well-deserved night of rest. 
Want more Quinn and Sarah? Check out the Sanpshots Masterlist
To read all my fics, check out the Fanfiction Masterlist
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munsonsmixtapes · 1 day
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lmao i’m a lil embarrassed for asking but i can’t help it now that i saw you said to send in a request. can we have more virgin!eddie x experienced!reader? maybe she’s teaching him how to eat her out properly and she’s surprised by how into he is and how eager he is to please? with some cute puppy eddie fluff pleeeease 😇 lol doesn’t have to be this at all tbh, just anything with that pairing fr 😅
No need to be embarrassed, lovely! I absolutely love this request and pairing! I was actually thinking about writing more about them, if people are interested!
virgin!Eddie x experienced!reader
cw: oral (f receiving)
This is a continuation of this post!
After your first time with Eddie, you had made it a very regular thing. It didn’t matter whose place you ended up at, but you’d always end up in bed together. You’d be tangled up in the sheets either until the early morning or until you couldn’t walk, whichever came first.
And there was never any foreplay or much kissing involved either. You’d just get straight into the act, desperate to have Eddie’s dick inside you every single time. And you were addicted to the feeling, loving how confident he was becoming after you had been sleeping together for a while.
He was now shameless about the noises he made and it almost seemed like he was making them supper loud because he knew just how wet it always made you. He was getting really good, almost better than you which you didn’t think was possible.
There was something about being with him that felt so different from being with anyone else. He actually seemed to want to enjoy his time with you as opposed to the others who were just looking to take whatever it was that they wanted from you. Eddie was actually concerned about making you feel good and wanted to be sure that you were enjoying it just as much as him.
You and Eddie were in your bed for the third time that week and but found yourselves only making out. No clothes had been removed and the two of you seemed pretty content with just kissing while sensual music played in the background.
His lips moved with yours and your mind started to wonder what his mouth would feel like on your cunt. You knew he hadn’t eaten anyone out, but maybe you could have taught him. Maybe if he told him exactly what to do, he’d be able to do it, making you feel so much pleasure.
You pulled away from him and looked at his face. His pupils were blown and his lips were pink and swollen from all the kisses you had shared. He was so adorable that it hurt with his big brown eyes that were always filled with so much love and his hair that was always messy even after he had just brushed it.
“I did something wrong, didn’t I?” He was always asking that and it made you feel bad that that was always a thought in the back of his head. Even if he did do something “wrong” you would tell him nicely and help him correct it.
“No, no,” you shook your head and moved your hand up to wrap one of his curls around your finger, twirling it around the digit. “I was just wondering if maybe you wanted to…eat me out?”
Eddie nodded his head vigorously and his eyes went wide. He was definitely more up for it than you had anticipated and that made you feel better about the whole thing.
“I can definitely do that,” he nodded again. “But…I don’t know how.”
“I could coach you through it,” you told him, a small smile kicked up at the corner of his mouth.
“You’d do that?” Of course you would have.
“Mhm,” you replied. “Do you want to?” He wanted nothing more and was getting so hard thinking about having his head between your thighs.
“So bad, baby,” his hands squeezed your hips. “You have no idea.”
You both sat up and Eddie got off of you, unsure where to place himself and you took him by the hands, wanting to have a discussion before anything started. You wanted to make sure that he knew that he could back out at any point and that he didn’t have to do it just to please you if he wasn’t enjoying it.
He nodded along as you spoke, taking in every single word as if they were very important to him. All of the talks you had had about consent were just as important to him to listen as they were to you to speak them.
“Alright, um, you’re going to want to get on your knees at the foot of the bed.” He listened and quickly got off the bed and lowered himself to his knees on the rug underneath him. You followed and placed yourself in front of him and took him by the hands.
You guided them up to the band of your panties and he slowly pulled them down your legs before setting them on the floor. He then slowly rested his hands on your knees and spread your legs, maintaining eye contact with you the entire time to make sure that it was okay. His eyes then drifted to your sopping wet pussy and you could see his cheeks blush.
“You’re soaked,” he let out a chuckle.
“Mhm,” you bit your bottom lip. “And it’s all for you, baby.” His cheeks flushed even more and you thought it was funny that you could make him do that just form a little comment. “Whenever you’re ready, drape a leg over each shoulder.
He did the action so quickly so you could tell that he was eager to get to it. He had definitely wanted it just as much as you did and that made you even more wet.
“Now when you get your face into it, use your tongue and lick back and forth to start.” He buried his face into your pussy and you let out a gasp as his nose brushed the sensitive skin.
He licked back and forth and you clutched the blanket underneath you as pleasure rolled through you. He kept going and you told him to suck on the spot which he did, eliciting a moan from you. He licked and sucked and you gripped the blanket even harder as your back arched in euphoria.
“You taste so good,” he told you before diving back in and you felt his teeth graze the sensitive spot, wondering where the hell he had learned that, but before you could ask, another moan fell from your lips.
“Sh-shit, Eddie.”
“You like that?” He laughed, loving that he was able to make you come undone for a change.
“Fuck, do that again.” He was quick to oblige and shoved his face back into your cunt, grazing it with his teeth once more and you reached your climax, letting out what Eddie thought was the loudest moan he had ever heard and was eager to hear it again.
“Could eat you all night, darling. Swear to god. Taste so fucking good.” He then replaced his teeth with his tongue, shoving as much of the muscle as he could inside of you and your back arched again as your knees pressed against his head.
Your moans has been muffled by your knees, but he could still hear them clearly as he continued to lick, suck, and graze it with his teeth. You had been eaten out more time than you could count, but this one was definitely the best out of them all. First off, he seemed so eager to please you, wanting to make you feel good. And he also loved the way you tasted, making sure to let you know while others didn’t seem to care enough to.
That was the difference. Eddie cared. He cared so much and always felt the need to tell you how much he was enjoying himself while making sure that you felt the same. It was all so important to him and that made you feel special even though you knew he would have done the same for anyone else.
Eddie removed his face from your cunt and you sat up, your breathing still labored as you looked down at him. You noticed slick dripping from his chin and just as you were about to let him know, he made direct eye contact with you and ran his tongue along his chin, getting every last drop before pulling his tongue back into his mouth.
“You’re so fucking hot,” you told him and pushed him to the ground before pressing your lips to his in a bruising kiss before licking into his mouth. “And by the way, you can eat me out anytime you want.”
“Oh, I intend to,” he grinned and you pulled him into another kiss, neither of you bothering to get back into the bed as you removed your clothes for the first fuck of the night, knowing that Eddie could please you just as much as you pleased him.
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absolutebl · 2 days
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This Week in BL - We Are Surprised
Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.
May 2024 Wk 2
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Ongoing Series - Thai
Wandee Godday (Sat YT) ep 2 of 12 - Oh it’s fucking great. It could all go horribly south, of course. But it’s awesome at the moment. Messy gay and one of them is already pining? Got to love it. Including the negotiation.
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I’d love a good sex negotiation, it’s almost as good as linguistic negotiation. This show makes me happy. All that said, it’s moving awfully quickly for a 12 episode run. Not sure what’s gonna happen on the backend. 
My Stand-In (Thai Fri iQIYI) ep 3 of 12 eps - I’m still enjoying it but I’m ready for him to die again now. 
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We Are (Weds iQIYI) ep 5-6 of 16 - Toey is going after the Namgoong Award for Best Wingman this year, I see. And in exchange, literally all the rest of the friends are going to be his wingmen. It’s adorable. I also like that Phuwin got to be the aggressor for the first kiss. I like that this is mostly just boys flirting, and not really any prescribed seme/uke stuff. In general, I think these last two episodes I improved the show in my regard a lot. But then middles are always GMMTV's strong point, it’s whether they can stick the landing that’s an issue.
Two Worlds (Thurs iQIYI) ep 9 of 10 - Apparently we have the Frodo walking into Mordor episode. Also the sides were cute. In Thailand (like Taiwan) all gangsters are gay, apparently. 
Only Boo! (Sun YouTube) ep 5 of 12 - It’s cute but very cringe and dorky. Silly singing. Terrible pickup lines. Still, that was a ridiculously charming confession.
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Ongoing Series - Not Thai
Unknown (Taiwan Tues YouTube & Viki) ep 12fin - Oh so good. Very few shows that feature one-sided long-term pining of this kind can resolve the unevenness of that power dynamic into a more stable and equal footing with such class. We really got to see the object of the desire turn completely around and become equally besotted. An age gap, stepbrothers trope like this one is hard enough but at this length? Very well acted boys! Unknown managed to show the older brother softening in a believable way that’s pretty unusual in narratives of this type.
All in all?
Unknown is a wonderful BL with a pitch perfect portrayal of long term pining, age gap, and the stepbrothers trope. The acting and chemistry are ON POINT (especially from the leads) which made the resulting characters very believable. When it dwells in intimate family drama, it's stunning. It's slightly less successful when it leaves the home and goes gritty. It's few flaws are the result of curtailed length. It could have used more breathing room to deal with side plots, characters, and companion character development. The editing was occasionally choppy and packed with flashbacks that broke the emotional tension. Still, those are mere quibbles. This is an excellent show that I know I'm going to be recommending a lot. 9/10
Finally Taiwan hits another one out of the park.
About.
Damn.
Time.
Blue Boys (Korea Sat YouTube) 4 of ? - Oh it’s so good, and they are so tortured and it’s just charming and I can’t EVEN. I just love it. I love that Korea is giving us this right now. You’re an idiot if you’re not watching this show, it’s truly spectacular.
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At 25:00 in Akasaka AKA 25 Ji Akasaka de (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 4 of 10 - Well well well Japan. I see how you kneed. I enjoyed this episode better than the first two, and I am way into our Bad Boy second lead. I can already feel myself succumbing  to the syndrome. Next week = the obligatory onsen ep! 
Living With Him AKA Kare no Iru Seikatsu (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 5 of 10 - Omg most adorbs failed linguistic negotiation. 
Boys Be Brave AKA Roommates (Korea Thurs Viki) ep 5-6 of 8 - I love the side couple. It’s a shame we’re finally getting some truly great class conflict and it’s relegated to crumbs.
Love is like a Cat (Korea Mon Viki) eps 11-12fin - Well that was a waste of time. There was no connection (of any kind) between the leads. The language thing was hella weird and likely added to that. The past history of the Korean character was necessary to know from the start, its lack throughout, meant there was no depth to his character. They tried to tackle all the interesting stuff in the final 2 eps. AND they even killed the dog. I never thought I'd type this sentance, but Peach of Time is better.
I don’t know. 5/10 I guess
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All in all:
A disappointing lackluster and barely cohesive BL about a jerk Thai actor (speaking Thai) who has to work for a Korean animal rescue cafe as a publicity stunt. It's difficult to believe the leads like each other, let alone fall in love. The acting is stiff, the characters lack motivation and cohesion, and there's not much to recommend this show beyond some pretty visuals. Also, they kill the dog. All in all, a disappointing and unsuccessful joint venture that mostly highlighted that between Thailand and Korea the style of BL, narrative approach, language cadence, and acting techniques all clash.
It's airing but...
Lady Boy Friends (Thai WeTV grey) 16 eps - reminds me a bit too much of Diary of Tootsies only high school. Not my thing. DNF unless it turns a corner and is truly amazing.
You Made My Day (Thai YT) ep 1 of 5 - mini series staring the I Will Knock You couple Tar & Bom, started but I couldn't find it. I also didn't try very hard.
A Balloon's Landing (Taiwan movie) trailer - A frustrated Hong Kong writer, Tian Yu, meets a Taipei street gangster, Xiang (Fandy Fan from HIStory2: Crossing the Line), and the two of them embark on a journey to find the Bay of Vanishing Whales. Along the way, they discover unexpected twists and turns and close bonds, which brings out the message that "there is always someone like you in this world who is waiting for you. This released to cinemas in Taiwan, no word on international release.
Memory in the Letter (Thai WeTV) - it's done, tell me if I should bother?
Fan's Only Corner
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Someone asked in a comment (which tumblr promptly ate) about group sleepovers in BLs. It's happened a few times but the only one I can recall being noted and particularly lovely (and VERY college) was in Nitiman. There's also one in Lovesick.
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Next Week Looks Like This:
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5/16 Blossom Campus (Korea Thurs Gaga & iQIYI) ep 1 of 6 - Strongberry doing classic uni BL! Weeee!
5/19 OMG Vampire (Thai Sun ????) ep 1 of 10 - LeeFrank are back - not unlike the undead (as it were). But how do we feel about it? Unsure given their track record.
Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.
May Releases
VBL (Taiwan) is releasing 4 'Special Episode' epilogues to their 4 2023 shows every Friday this month on Gagaoolala, Viki & Viu. Not sure on search terms or how to find these. (Or, frankly, if we need them.)
5/10 – You Are Mine
5/17 – VIP Only
5/24 – Stay By My Side
5/31 – Anti Reset
5/25 The Time of Fever AKA Unintentional Love Story 2 (Korea movie) trailer - HoTae & DongHee are back but unfortunately not in a cinema near me. Side couple from Unintentional Love Story, same actors, same character names. I love them. I NEED TO SEE THIS.
5/28 My Biker 2 (Thai movie YT?) - trailer
5/31 The Time of Huannan (Taiwan movie) - May not be BL
THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS
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LOVE a smile kiss. Love it. Two killer kisses from PondPhuwin. Elegantly done, boys. Thank you very much.
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I love them a lot all of a sudden. (All We Are)
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It's hard to give MaxTul a run on their crown as best bodies in BL, but boy these two are giving it their, erm, best. (Wandee Goodday)
(Last week)
Streaming services are listed by how I (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are a pain.
The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly @renafire
If ya wanna be tagged each week leave a comment and I will add you to the template. Easy peesy.
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fairykazu · 2 days
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the battle for the bill with gaming masterlist ++ cw: friends to lovers, pining, first date
it was his first ever date with you, at a dim sum restaurant that recently opened in liyue harbor. he spent like weeks just planning one date just because he was nervous on how you would react or reject him. he had to ask other people for opinions or eavesdrop on your conversations with your friends on what kind of guy you like.
but instead of spiraling even further, thankfully, he let his friends sway him to believe that you like him or believe the fact you like him back in a form of manifestation.
maybe it worked because you agreed to the date with no questions asked. 
gaming was so chill about it and everything. he just casually mentioned that he finished his kung-fu practice and that he booked something, and it was an invitation only.
it was during the afternoon or rather, a couple hours until the reservation’s time was up. the day was windy but when he saw you, it gently danced around you and the leaves that were up in his face were just flying atop of your head, not even hitting you in the face. 
(and mind you, this is not overly exaggerated… the source? gaming.)
“so, how did you accidentally book for two?” you asked as you stared into his brown eyes, making him nervous by the second. 
“i was supposed to go with my uncle but since you're here with me, wanna come with?” gaming said with a wink. it was more like a nervous twitch than the flirty wink but hopefully you took it the other way. 
you looked at him as if you thought he was lying. he swore he could feel himself getting more dizzy as his palms got more clammy. are hands supposed to be this sweaty? maybe the archons shouldn’t have given him a pyro vision because clearly, he’s meant for the hydro one. “sure. when is it?” 
holy shit, he didn’t even think about it even working. he sputtered out, “it’s a date! i mean, date, six! i mean! ohmygod. new dim sum place at six, you're pretty. it’s a, uh, friend thing!” 
you laughed in response. maybe you were tricking him into a prank where you totally accept and ditch last minute. or even, you were laughing at him not with him and you are planning to talk behind his back or something. he knows you wouldn’t have done that but the idea of rejection is catching up to him. “see you on the date, gaming.” 
you walked off and the wind hit him in the face again. but it didn’t even bother him this time because oh my god, it worked. he meant, of course it worked! manifestation is real. “oh my god. thank you, morax, thank you all the archons for this luck. i thank you.” he got on his knees and started to cry. then he quickly got up because too many people were looking at him and he was getting a tad embarrassed at what he just did. 
and of course, he had a plan:
step one: act like a gentleman, and you will instantly be swooned by his charms.  (plan created by liyue squad . . . call 555-LUV-CUPIDS for advice on looove! ). 
he really tried but you managed to be one step ahead of him. he picked you up in a kar, a new invention from fontaine that just dropped in liyue. he quickly opened his door, sliding across the bonnet of the kar, an audible squeak was heard from the inside of the car. 
you watched him roll off the car, he brushed off the dust off his clothes just before he opened your door, his hair, once slicked back, was back to his normal fluffiness. “for you, my lady.” he said, in a formal tone. he tried to practice a fontainian accent but it did not go as well as he thought he did. xinyan pointed out he sounded more mondstadtian-ist-something than french. 
you laughed, it was elegant and pretty and he swore his knees turned into jelly, he stiffly got up, teeter tottering away from the car. “ahem, shall we?” he extended his hand to you and you accepted it. 
you were glowing. you looked stunning in your dress and maybe he says this a lot in his head. but if you were walking down the sidewalks, he would see you, get blinded by your beauty and crash his kar into a building. his cause of death? you but he’d be grateful because his last image before he died was seeing you. 
“gaming, you ready?” 
“born ready… i mean, of course, i am. c’mon lets go.” when he was about to open the door for you, you held it open, “shall we?” 
“haha, we shall.” 
the waiter welcomed ga-ming into the restaurant, escorting the both of you to your table. 
you leaned into him, it was so close! did he appreciate it? yes, he really did. he liked the smell of your perfume. it was very jasmine like, floral and pretty. can you even smell the word, “pretty”? yes and it was you. 
“gaming, i thought you said this was a new place and that you haven’t tried it yet?” you asked as he froze up. he had to be dragged by you to the table. 
(note to past gaming, from future gaming: he didn’t say all that. YOU WERE LYING!!!)
“uh, surprise?” 
he felt his time come, this is what he was made for. the gentleman, the best way to swoon someone by pulling their chair out for them. he was ready. he could feel the angelic spotlight shining on his shoulders as he reached for the chair. he remembered what he was supposed to say, “for you?” or “cmon sit down.” or… something like that. 
shit, did he forget his training? 
but you beat him to it, you pulled out a chair for him, tilting your head to him. instead of protesting, he sat down immediately. he didn’t put up a fight at all.
he cringed.
 it was pitiful! he was like a dog! 
he was so going to get you back for this. 
totally. 
(...not!)
step two: flirting !!! 
gaming blinked at his friends who somehow pulled a blackboard from the closet. “what do you mean by, “flirt” with them?” he asked as xiangling pointed with a ruler, 
“well, you know, just flirt with your natural charm.” the swordsman bursted out laughing, wiping a tear off his face. eyes still watery, xingqiu quipped back, 
“if he had natural charm, you’d think he’d be with them by now.” 
gaming scrunched up his face, burying his face into the pillows. muffled, “i do! i mean, i am going to charm them!” 
xinyan sat next to him, he scooted more into the pillow. if he tried to scoot more, he’d roll into the cushion. “gaming, just serenade her.” she made a strumming motion as he sighed, “i don’t think i have that skill set.” 
xiangling added, “don’t be a buzzkill, i see how they look at you, i think you’re fine.” 
“if anything, just manifest it.” 
gaming threw the pillow from his face, hitting xingqiu in the process, ignoring the blue haired guy storming to him with two pillows in both hands. “you’re right! i’ll manifest it.” 
he tried his best to remember his lessons of how to know to flirt or whatever but he forgot already. he stammered, “so the weather am i right?” he wanted to kill himself. if he was able to clone himself, he’d kill the other in a heartbeat. he laughed nervously as you smiled,
“pretty cool. gaming, do you have any recommendations from this place? or does xiangling know you’re betraying her by going to this place?” you asked. it’s true, when xiangling was planning this date with the crew, she mourned the location of the date not being at wanmin restaurant. 
“i like the xiao long bao with the pork but we can switch out the meat if you like or really, we could go the vegetable ones. yes, xiangling knows and she thinks i'm a traitor.” gaming said with a dejected sigh, making you giggle. 
yes! side quest accomplished. 
“that’s disappointing, gaming, why didn’t we go to wanmin restaurant?” you asked despite knowing the full reason why. everytime you encountered anyone from the liyue squad, there was always a kamera flash in the corner and somehow it’s always xingqiu. gaming nervously laughed, pulling his collar from his neck, 
“well, you know how they are, i think, they’d fangirl or something.” 
you laughed again and everyday he thanks the archons to let him live in this generation because then he could see you everyday. “like that group?” 
gaming’s face dropped as you laughed a little harder, “sorry, sorry, i was just messing with you.” 
the brunette laughed it off too despite his whole demeanor tensed up in fear, “gee, if you’re going to do that, give me a warning ahead of time.” he quickly grabbed the glass of water, sipping on the straw. 
you tilted your head, “it wouldn’t be just as fun then, i like how cute your expressions are.” he started to choke midway drinking his water, you quickly rose out of your seat and patted him on the back. 
he swallowed, “thank you?” he hoped his blush wasn’t noticeable. unfortunately it was, his blush spread to the tips of his ears. 
“of course!” 
gaming devised a new plan, he called it, screw the hundred step plan by the cupids. he will just go with the flow! well, actually, he’d go for step number ten: pay for the meal. after you two finished dinner, you were getting your wallet from your bag but gaming stopped you, “allow me.” he fished out his lion shaped pouch from his pockets. 
“i’ll pay for the bill, gaming, it’s fine.” you insisted as he declined your offer. grabbing your bag and slinged around his body. “name, i took you out, it’s my treat. you can pay me back next time.” 
“sorry but our schedules don’t always line up perfectly like this, gaming. you know this so you should just let me pay for our meals. it’s not much.” 
“you shouldn’t go out of your way to pay for the meal! and look,” he gestured to your bag, wallet still in it. “you don’t have mora on you, so i’ll go pay.” he raised his hand up, getting the bill. 
“i have a card.” 
“name, really, i can pay. you can pay me next time, okay?” he tried to bargain with you but you kept going. luckily, he built over defense about paying the bill for years. “don’t play that game with me, gaming. it’s okay, i can pay.” 
“oh my god, name, is that international pop idol, robin?” gaming shouted as you whipped your head around. “where!”
he quickly sneaked out of the table, tip toeing to the front. despite being out gentleman’d by his date, you have won the battle but he will win the war. until he saw a familiar figure in front of him, paying for the meal already, he dropped to his knees. 
internally screaming no in his heart, a mighty soldier has fallen and it was him. the one who betrayed his love and out-gentleman's him, was you. he didn’t even know how you did it. are you secretly related to sonic the hedgehog? 
he wouldn’t mind actually… that’s besides the point. how did you even… ? (he was actually tiptoeing and you just sped past him).
 “gaming, c’mon, get up.” you said, lending a hand. nevermind, all is forgiven, he is holding your hand right now. thank you, gods, i have lived. one day i will live again when i meet them in every universe and slash or life. “i paid already.” 
“how?” 
“magicians don’t reveal their secrets.” you replied with a smile. just before gaming was going ask to elaborate, you quickly kissed his lips.
he melted into it, only standing still and shaking as he held up a thumbs up. "okay!"
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notafragilething · 2 days
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Late Night Buck & Tommy Rambles: Vertigo Week
Happy Sunday evening. I'm on the cusp of an insanely busy week but I wanted to spend my last calm evening sharing some of my thoughts on Buck and Tommy with all of you. So let's get into the highlights of the weekend.
Let's start with the hospital kiss Instagram reels data. Right now the video is at 921k and 83k in likes. It did get passed by the Happy Birthday Gavin post but who can blame that. But strangely enough, it still holds the 9th overall place because the video of Oliver making a basket on set of episode 4 is now gone. I'm really not sure what happened to that one. With that said, there is now only a 26k difference between it and video 8 and I do think at some point in the coming weeks it will pass that. I'm probably not going to be checking this everyday anymore since the views has slowed so much (which is to be expected). I'll probably check in once a week until it hits a million or until another Tevan reel is posted.
The Vertigo Poster nonsense that happened late last night and early this morning. I already made a post talking about this here so please go check that out if you want to know my thoughts on it. But to quickly summarize: it was made by a friend and posted on Tim's private Facebook. I'm not personally going to be putting much thought into it or using it for any theories because I don't think there is anything more to it then being a fun spoof poster made by a friend.
After seeing the second round of interviews with Ryan coming out on Friday I am now fully confident that marketing is doing a hard-kill on pushing Buddie. I was predicting this in my last ramble but now I'm fairly confident I was right. Ryan repeatedly hit the same key points in multiple interviews by explicitly saying that Eddie is straight. At this point, that seems to be intentional and seemed to be a talking point that marketing wanted out there. There also seemed to be far less buddie questions so I'm fairly sure they're not approving or limiting how many interviewers can ask.
Next weeks episode prediction: We will not be seeing Tommy...and possibly not Eddie or Buck. The summary only focuses on Bobby's storyline and the preview only showed him (and Athena). This might be an episode where the rest of the cast isn't there and is solely focused on what is happening with Bobby and Athena. If it does include the rest of the cast, it looks like there only going to appear in very short segments and are definitely not the focus. Which does mean the Eddie storyline is either on pause for next week or marketing is really, really killing anything involving Buck or Eddie.
Final thoughts: I don't predict anymore interviews with Oliver or Lou until the finale. Probably not anymore for Ryan either that haven't already been done. Marketing in general seems to have massively pulled back after the mess with the bachelor party. I think we won't get anything about this week until Thursday (just like last week).
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rejectedbytheempty · 20 hours
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Hey could you write something about older Ghost with a younger curvy wife, and potentially having sons together (only if you’re comfortable with that). Rn I’m obsessed with dilf Simon living his domestic best life lol
okay, so i have no clue why this took me so long. anyways, forgive me, i’ve never written for ghost before so most definitely will be ooc. also kind of a newer writing style for me, let me know if it sucks balls or not !!
When you first met Simon, it was at a bar. Your eye had been drawn to the big, hulking man with a skull mask nursing a glass of whiskey. It surprised you that when you went up to talk to him, he was a blushing and stuttering mess. He stumbled over his words, accidentally spilling his drink all over you when he went to shake your hand. He apologized profusely and immediately went to take off his shirt so you didn’t have to wear a bourbon stained top. It was only after you blushed and turned away that he realized just what he did. He looks back on that memory with a grimace but you love telling it because you knew you found the man you wanted to spend the rest of your life with.
After a few weeks of dating you, his team had noticed a difference in his demeanor, he was.. happy? It took constant jabs from Johnny and Gaz’s puppy dog eyes for him to finally come clean. Pulling out a picture of you made all of their jaws drop. Johnny immediately asked “What’s that bonnie little thing doing with you?” But after a slap to the head by Price, Soap shut up. Simon pretended like it didn’t bother him, like he hadn’t already thought that himself. A couple of days later, he tried to break up with you. For your own good, he had too much baggage, and he was older than you. He would ruin your life, he decided. Too bad you didn’t agree, practically slapping him upside the head like Price did to Soap. That was when Ghost well and truly fell in love with you.
A year later, he proposed. You had said yes, of course. The hardest part had been pretending to be surprised. It wasn’t hard to figure it out when he was shaking like a leaf all throughout your fancy dinner. Then, on your wedding day, he was the same nervous ball of energy. It took a talk from Price to get him to calm down. It was a small ceremony, but you both preferred it that way, it was more intimate. By the time you both got to your vows, both of you were crying, choking on your words to the point where you just moved on to the kiss. After the ceremony, Simon swept you up into a bridal carry. He was able to pick you up with ease, which you never got over, even after all this time. As he carried you down the aisle, he was only looking at you, his brown eyes glinting with tears through his balaclava.
Simon was gone for long periods of time on deployment, but when he came back to you, he was all over you. Constantly at your back, grabbing at your curves and burying his face into your neck. He loved spoiling you, constantly buying you things, whether you liked it or not. Even if you mention something in passing, it’ll be on the dining table with breakfast the next morning. When Simon is away for his missions, you guys send letters back and forth. Sometimes you include little pictures of yourself, some more raunchy than others. One time while Gaz was looking for Ghost, he found those letters sitting out on a desk, including the pictures. Gaz turned beet red when Simon walked in, muttering apologies in a squeaky voice before running out of the room.
It had been about six months since your wedding when you found yourself bent over the toilet. One positive pregnancy test later and Simon was pacing around the room. He hadn’t expected it to happen this quick, he wasn’t sure if he was ready. Panic seized him, images of his father flashed in his mind. It took you coaxing him to the bed and rubbing soothing circles on his back for him to calm down. You had reassured him that he wasn’t his father, that he was an amazing husband and would be an amazing father. Simon sat there for a moment and then put his hand to your stomach, leaning down to touch his forehead to yours. You were right, as always, and he would be there every step of the way, for you, and for your child.
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AITA for lying to my friends and causing someone to end their life?
🫐☎️🧼 
So I can find this later
Trigger warning for suicide. 
In this situation I'm aware I fucked up badly multiple times, but I want to know for sure whether I was in the wrong. I went through the FAQ to check that this submission is okay and sorry if there's something disqualifying it I didn catch!
I (minor) was active in an online group where I made some online friends. The group was for preteens, teens, and very young adults (13-21.) I befriended one person, Blueberry (fake name, because emoji) and we became close over a few months. At one point they admitted they had a crush on me I didn't feel the same, but we agreed to stay friends and it didn't affect the friendship.
One thing about this group is that it was aimed at mental health. Me and this person had similar problems with depression and suicidal thoughts (both actively suicidal) and often talked when one of us was in a dark place. When Blueberry turned 18 things took a turn for the worst. Multiple times a week they had panic attacks (they were in the process of getting diagnosed with OCD and bad intrusive thoughts) or crisis and attempted several times. I got overwhelmed. Instead of establishing a boundary like I should have, I started ghosting them for a few hours if it got too bad. It got to the point I'd log on once or twice a day to check in, but instead of ever chatting, the conversation always ended in their next plan to kill themselves. This one was my fault, as we'd had casual convos about this stuff in the main group. I and others did what we could to help, like providing support and helplines. Blueberry did contact many and it saved them lots. 
By this point Blueberry had done lots of other risky stuff. They lashed out and blocked a lot of mutual friends, made a fake account to pretend to be a young teen at one point (but deleted it when I asked), and other things. I didn't want to lose them as a friend so I covered for Blueberry when it was exposed. I should point out Blueberry was never mean to me they were really nice. They liked to learn about my interests and complimented me and others lots and I tried to do the same (learn about what they liked, tell them I was happy to hear from them, etx)
Obviously people of the group felt betrayed when they found out Blueberry was catfishing them as this younger teen. In Blueberry's own words, I was "the only one they could trust." Blueberry admitted again that they wanted to be more than friends, but since they were now 18 and I was still a few years younger than them I asked to just be friends because the age gap was uncomfy. They were okay with it. The next day, Blueberry said goodbye to me and deleted their account. I was really upset by this and we talked one last time where I wished them well and said how much I'd miss them but didn't think something was seriously wrong because Blueberry and me had discussed them leaving the group before because it was hurting their mental health. 
Later a friend of both Blueberry and me reached out about their behavior the days before they left and some conversations I hadn't seen. All of us are pretty sure they didn't just delete their account—they killed themself. The goodbye message proved this. I was upset and angry that they were dead, said sorry to the group for lying to them about Blueberry catfishing, and left the group.
I think I may be the asshole here because I was really selfish here in not wanting to address Blueberry's really creepy catfishing (pretending to be a young teen, which knowing that they had romantic feelings for me could have led to them befriending people lots younger than them which is bad) because I didn't want to lose the friendship, and also because if I hadn't ghosted Blueberry using mental health as an excuse I don't think they would have killed themselves. If I am the asshole here, what could I do better next time if I have a similar problem again? 
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carmenberzattosgf · 2 days
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carmy somehow manages to keep the tattoo hidden from you until it’s properly healed and when he finally reveals it he’s so happy that you like it!! you gently touch it and that’s what makes him lose it—taking your clothes off and settling you on his thigh saying “make yourself feel good f’me. that’s your initial on it, yeah? so it’s yours. i’m yours.” doesn’t help that it feeds into his thing for marking, feeling how wet you are against his thigh -💫
Oh my beloved 💫 anon your thoughts always HIT. I’m thinking Carmy legit keeps one of those big bandaids on it until it heals, blaming it on getting hot oil spilled on him in the kitchen or something if you asked about it. More under the cut!!
You’re in the bathroom, finishing up brushing your teeth when he calls for you in the bedroom. “Baby, can you come here really quick?” When you enter the room, Carmy’s sitting on the edge of the bed, wearing only boxer briefs. “Will you rip off this bandaid for me?” He says, pointing to the large bandaid that’s covering a spot on his thigh. “I don’t wanna do it myself.”
“It’s been on there for like a week now. Are you sure you want me to? It’s going to hurt like hell.” Little did you know that Carmy has been putting on the bandage every day at the restaurant before heading home. That way, the tattoo could properly heal. You walk over to his feet, kneeling in front of him. Carmy swallows deeply, nervous as you peel up the very edge of the bandaid.
“Yeah, I’m sure. Just count to three and go for it.”
“Alright. One, two, three—“ Carmy doesn’t even flinch. Your eyes shift down to his thigh and you finally see it. It’s your initials in cursive script right in the middle of his thigh. The tattoo isn’t huge. Honestly it’s quite dainty compared to his others. “Carmy— is that?” You look up at him in complete shock.
“Mhm. Uh— do you like it?” He scratches the back of his neck nervously, awaiting your answer.
“Of course I do! You got my initials on you, Carm. I love it.” You begin to reach your hand out to touch it before pulling back. “Wait, can I touch it? Is it healed?”
“I got it two weeks ago. It should be all healed up.”
You’re careful as you run your fingers over the lettering. Goosebumps rise on his skin from your touch. “It’s so pretty, Carmy. Thank you for getting it for me.” Without a wasting a second, you lean down to press a delicate skin on the inked skin.
There’s something about you on your knees in front of Carmy, kissing his thigh, that gets him hard in a matter of seconds. Carmy pulls you up quickly. You know from the second you see the look in his eye, and the bulge in his pants, what he’s thinking. “Need to take these off,” he mumbles as his hands push into the waistband of your pants. “Can I take these off?” His movements pause as he waits for your permission. His blue eyes are completely blown out as they look up at you.
“Y-yeah. Please.” As soon as the words leave your mouth, Carmy pulls down your sweatpants and underwear in one go. He grabs your waist, shuffling you towards him to stand with his tattooed-adorned thigh in between your legs.
“Sit,” he instructs. His strong hands at your side urge you to sit down on his thigh. You whine when your soaked core meets his skin, right on top of your initials.
“Carmy—shit.”
“Already so wet. You must really like seeing your initials on my skin. I’m marked up forever now.” His voice is rough, completely filled with arousal. “I want you to ride my thigh and make yourself feel good for me. Can you do that baby?”
“Mhm,” you respond. Your hips move eagerly on his thigh. Your slick makes the movement easy. Your eyes are drawn to the sight below you, Carmy’s tattoo completely covered in your arousal. Carmy notices where your eyes are locked, and his follow suit. His hands tighten on your hips, watching as you desperately grind on his thigh.
“That’s your initials right there. All yours. I’m all yours, now,” he whispers into your ear before moving down to press kisses to your neck and jaw. You’re already close, cunt throbbing against him.
“Carm, fuck. I’m—I’m close,”
“Let go then. Make a mess all over me. Soak your initials.” Carmen’s words send you over the edge as you cum on his thigh. Your legs shake as your head falls into the crook of his neck. “Good job, baby. Did so good for me.”
When you have the strength again, you lift up your head and plant a huge kiss onto Carmy’s lips. “I love you so fucking much. Thank you for getting this tattoo. It means the world to me.”
“Gotta show people who I belong to somehow,” he laughs.
“Let me try and show you just how much it means to me, yeah?” You say, slowly sinking down to your knees in front of him.
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dumpywrites · 3 days
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Tears and Poetries - Namjoon / RM
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Prompt: “You look familiar, like that one guy from BTS.”
Prompt request: HERE
Genre/tags: Fluff, comfort, idol Namjoon, non fan reader 
Pairing: Namjoon x reader
a/n: Come back to me got me feeling all inspired soooo yeah :)
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It was late. Frankly you did not bother to check the time but you knew it was at least way past twelve. You just needed some air. Late night polluted air might not be the right option, but it was the best you could have at the moment. Getting out was the only coping response your mind could think off. Getting out from where exactly you could not be sure. 
Work life had been a real shit-show. You were on your fifth revision for your company project and your manager still would not accept your draft. While life? Life had been pretty exhausting. Recently your mother had been pestering you about wanting you to achieve more, comparing you to her friends’ sons and daughters, while also underestimating your own accomplishment. 
And not even two weeks ago, a guy who you were seeing just admitted that he apparently had a girlfriend. He really just dropped that info to you like a bomb, as if you did not spend time with each other the past six months. True, you never really put a label on whatever you both had, but in your head you were single and so was he. Until he told you that he got a girlfriend and had dated her for a month already. 
The wound still felt fresh especially with all the external problems added to the equation. Bearing the feeling of unwanted, unimportant, and never enough at once, was hard. Even labeling it as only hard sounded like an understatement. 
So you ran. Theoretically speaking you did not run away, you just took off from your apartment randomly to wherever your feet and your worn off sneakers took you. And they took you to a random spot near a river. 
You sat down on the dirty grassy ground, not minding how your shorts could get dirty from it.  Just sitting down and looking at the night sky, as if the cold breeze would calm you and do anything besides giving you a possibility of catching cold. 
Five, fifteen, maybe it was around half an hour you had been sitting there with empty thoughts, just letting the cold air hit your skin, when you suddenly heard a sound of a bicycle stopping and footsteps approaching. 
“Hello? Are you alright there?”
The deep voice started you and made you look back in an instant. There was a tall and quite big built guy standing with his bicycle. He had a buzzcut from the very faint image you could see due to the low light. 
Although skeptic, you decided to answer. “Yeah, don’t worry.”
“You sure?”
You realized how shaky and stuffy your voice sounded. It probably was not a very convincing “don’t worry”. And when you did not voice another reply, the person parked their vehicle and slowly walked towards your direction. 
“Hey! Stranger danger!” You said, backing off from where you were seating. 
The guy stopped in his tracks but did not walked away. “Do you mind if I join your pondering session? Who knows two great minds might think alike.” 
You stayed still in your position, eyes searching for his in the very confusing lack of light. You could barely make out of what he looked like. 
“I’m not a creep, I swear!” He threw his hands in the air. “There’s a police station nearby if you wanna shout as loud as you can, they could hear you from here.” 
He took your silence as a green light and stepped closer until he reached a spot on your left. He cleared his throat and sat down next to you. 
There you could eventually fully saw his face. The first thing you noticed was the nicely shaped nose, and his plump lips, then his dimples which showed when he politely smiled at you. 
The first ten minutes was spent in complete silence. You did not expect the man to whip out a notepad and pencil and just started writing. A story? Poem? Or song? You tried your best not to sneak a look. He was even humming at some point when he wrote, and it was strangely enough, soothing. 
“What are you writing?” You finally asked, the suspense was killing you. 
“Thought you’d never ask.” He replied with excitement. “I’m writing a poem. Though I’m starting to think it’d sound better as a song.”
“You’re a singer or something?”
The man looked at you in disbelief for a good second before chuckling. “Sorta.”
“Am I suppose to know you?” You eyed him back with the same questioning look. 
“Dunno.” He shrugged. “Maybe it’s a good thing that you don’t know for today.”
You looked at the guy suspiciously, which earned a laugh from him. “The more I think about it, I think I’ve seen your face somewhere…”
“Oh yeah?” He said, a light tone of nervousness was visible in his voice. 
“You look familiar, like that one guy from BTS.”
He almost choked on nothing. “I’m sorry, what?!”
“Yeah, that one dude from BTS.” You repeated. “Although I don’t think any one from them has a buzzcut… Idols always seem to have either colorful hair or beautiful long locks.” 
“Really…” The man voiced out, sounding unsure. 
“Are you perhaps an indie artist? K-hiphop? Don’t tell me you are a DPR member that I somehow don’t know about or something…”
“Okay, enough about that it’s not important.” He dismissed. “You wanna take a look of what I’ve written?”
“Uh, sure…”
You leaned a bit closer to him and peeked over his notes. He took his notepad nearing it to your side so you could read better. Despite the low source of illumination, you could read the delicately written words. It was deep and meaningful. Whatever he wrote on that paper seemed a little too real to just be a song, it almost felt like it came from true experience. 
“You sound like you went through hell to get to where you are right now.” 
You commented, you were not aware of how reading through his words affected you until you could practically hear your heartbeat. You clutched at your chest, trying to calm it down. 
“I’m not only talking about the sufferings.” He pointed out. “I also mentioned about the journeys in between.”
His expression brightened as he explained further. You found it really attractive for some reason. 
“The feeling of loss, left out, were there alongside the feeling of excitement, growth, and wanting to change for the better.” He grinned. “And I think life needs that small bits of flavor to complete us as human beings… Wouldn’t have loved myself so much without all my struggles and flaws.”
You gazed at the guy in front of you in awe. “Guess you’re right.” You finally broke into a smile. “That was beautiful though, almost got me tearing up.”
“Thank you.” He grinned, showing his dimples. “What about you though? What’s on your mind?”
“It’s kinda lame…” You nervously laughed. 
“I’m listening.” He scooted closer, making your knees touched. 
“There are a whole list of messed up things happening in my life right now, but I guess I could name one or two…” 
You took a deep breath and the guy in front of you patiently waited for you to speak. 
“Basically my mom’s been yelling at me saying stuff about how unsuccessful I am for my nine to five job, while getting bullied by my manager at work, and not to mention, how I just got dumped by a guy who I was seeing for six months.”
“That’s fucked up…” He looked at you with wide eyes. 
“You tell me.” You replied sassily. “I mean I guess for the most part it wasn’t really about the problem itself. I’m aware of how perfectionist my manager could be and multiple revision is expected. My mom never really feels content with anything, so that’s also expected. And that fucking guy leaving me? It was probably for the better…”
“Hey.” He grabbed your shoulder suddenly, catching you in a surprise. “Don’t downplay your feelings like that. You’re allowed to feel sad when other people treats you like utter shit. It’s valid.” 
There was something about his words that triggered an emotion within you. Unknowingly, a tear escaped your eyes, followed by more next. 
You leaned backwards to free from his grip, only for him to lose it but proceeded to take off his knitted sweater, revealing a black oversized t-shirt underneath. He took it off with one hand before shoving it through your head so you could wear it. 
“It’s chilly. You might catch a cold.” 
Hesitantly, you rolled the sweater through your body. You felt the neckline stained with tears and wondered if it was his polite way of helping you wipe your tears. You thanked him and he told you to continue. 
“I don’t know what else to say, I don’t want to trauma dump on you.” 
“How are you feeling though?” He asked, eyes gently looking at you. 
“I just… I felt unwanted? Unimportant and undesirable? It happened all at once and it got me connecting strings. The root cause of my problem felt like it came from me as a person and I felt sick…”
He gazed at you and quietly nod, allowing you to continue. 
“I came here because it was loud and deafening in here,” You tapped your head with a grin, trying to lighten the mood. “And I’m glad I did. Not only did I manage to tone it down a couple notches, I also get an exclusive song preview from a top star!” 
Both of you laughed in unison. You were the first to break the eye contact due to the sudden invasion of butterflies in your stomach. It might be dark and late at night, but your eyes could not lie about the beauty of the stranger in front of you. 
The silence was soon broken by a buzzing notification from his phone. It was on silent mode, but the multiple vibrations got him shuffling his hand on his pocket, fishing his phone out from his cargo pants. 
“Damn, I gotta head back. Someone needs me in the studio…” 
“At this hour?!” You argued immediately.
“Yeah, unfortunately.” He ran his hand through his short hair in a frustrated way. 
“What’s your name?” 
You both stopped and looked at each other, dumbfounded. Both of you asked the same question at the same time. Laughter filled the air once again. 
“You first.” The guy gestured. 
You got up and he followed right after. Now looking at how tall he was compared to you, spelling out your name felt a little bit harder. Your heart was beating in an abnormal rate. You finally managed to tell him your name and you patted yourself internally for not voicing out like a squealing hormonal teenager. 
“I’m Namjoon.” He said with a huge contagious smile. 
“Now where did I hear that name—“
“Can I have your number?” He interrupted. Glancing at his phone screen, a small groan escaped his lips. “It’s almost three, you have to go home.”
“Oh.” Your lips formed a small O shape. “Sure. Here, give me your phone…”
You both then exchanged phone numbers. 
“I want to take you back to your home so badly but I really can’t…” Namjoon sighed. “Besides, my bicycle can only do so much…” He chuckled. 
“It’s okay, I live nearby.” You smiled. “You take care, though.”
“Yeah, you too. I’ll text you?”
“Yeah.” You nodded happily. “Thank you, Namjoon.” 
“Don’t mention it, I’m really glad we met today.” He nodded at you before retreating to where he parked his bicycle. 
“Wait!” 
You followed, running to his direction. You stopped when your arms barely linked behind him, hugging him tightly. It was bold of you but it just felt right at the moment. 
“Thank you so much, I mean it.” You said with voice muffled a little by his clothes against your mouth. 
And you did. You meant it, it felt really nice having someone who actually listened to your problem and seemed like he cared about it too. 
He hugged back. “You’re not unwanted, okay? You are loved, please know that.”
You nodded and broke off the hug. A big smile plastered on your lips and he mimicked it. “Okay, you may go now.”
You both bid your goodbyes and that was how you found yourself smiling and giggling at three in the morning, by yourself, on your way back to your place, all while hugging the sweater that you forgot to give back. That encounter was weird, but in a very good way. It almost felt like the universe sent you an angel knowing how down you were feeling. In a peculiar way, it almost felt like he saved you. You went to sleep easily that night. 
The next morning you were awaken by a text notification popping up from Namjoon. You smiled like an idiot to yourself before opening it. 
“Good morning! I hope you slept well. Did you arrive safe yesterday? Sorry something came up, I wished I could stay longer.”
You quickly replied to him. “I slept good. Probably thanks to you, hehe. No problem though! Maybe we could hangout again someday? I need to return your sweater after all :)”
After typing the text and sending it, suddenly a curious thought filled your head. His name did ring an unknown bell. Namjoon did mention that he was a singer, an idol maybe? You could not be sure. You tapped your Google app on your phone and started typing his name followed by the word “singer” behind it. 
Maybe this was your cue to be more aware of the Kpop industry. You had your fair share of listening to K-hiphop, and were even an avid listener of groups like Epik High and Balming Tiger. 
So how come you failed to notice that last night you in fact just hugged Kim Namjoon, aka RM from the internationally well known boy group, BTS???
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Thank you for reading! 🌙
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a/n: this was a rather short one but i hope y'all like it nonetheless <3
Prompt request: HERE
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xkaidaxxxx · 2 days
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UNBELIEVABLE
KATSUKI BAKUGOU X CHUBBY READER
Mentions: Club, Virgin reader, Alcohol, Jealous kats, Fluff
Reblogs are appreciated <3
“ It’s unbelievable. I can’t believe she said yes! Ugh she’s the best” Kirishima said with his heart full of love. “Yeah Yeah Yeah we get it you have a girlfriend. Quit rubbing it in.” Denki replied, rolling his eyes. “ The rest of us are single as fuck.” Sero said. You felt defeated as well. 
You like Katsuki Bakugou. Sure he’s loud, explosive, crazy, has a hard time expressing himself, and is reserved but you like all those and more traits are very cute. You know he has his own little ways of saying thank you, sorry, or that he cares. You like the way he laughs and smiles, which is rare. His cooking is amazing. You love the way he always pushes forward and doesn’t allow anything to stop him. You’re basically head over heels for this man. Little did you know he likes you just as much as you like him. It is so insane how neither of you knows it. The girls tell you and you always say “ You guys don’t make me delusional.” You thought that way because you didn’t consider yourself beautiful. You’re a chubby girl. You hate your stomach fat. You hate the stretch marks. You hate when you sit down, your fat rolls. Katsuki thought otherwise. He loves your stomach rolls, He loves the way your costume shows off your thighs. He thinks your stretch marks are cute. He always says he wants you to squeeze his head in between your thighs. He knows there's so much more to love. He wants and needs you so bad. He is willing to do anything for you to be his girlfriend. He's on his knees at this point.
As time went by you did notice yourself spending more time with him. He threw hints at you. You did miss a few but then connected the pieces later on. 
“ Hey!! Come on dance with us!!!” Mina yelled over the loud music. You took your last 3 shots. “ Finally girl !!!” Momo yelled. You had 2 horrible weeks. You were desperate to have time off and have fun. You were all dolled up. You straighten your hair and put on simple makeup. The dress you wore was a bit short. It hugged you beautifully. The heels made you look even more sexier. Some guys were checking you out. Including Katsuki. You finally let yourself free. You danced like no one was there. Mina and Momo danced with you. A guy dances up behind you. He placed his hands on your waist. You couldn’t give 2 fucks. Katsuki was losing his mind. He was so jealous his small explosions said it all. The guy ran his hands down to your thighs. “When are you going to confess to her!? You’re dying right now! Go claim her!” Izuku said, smacking his head, over the loud music. Usually Katsuki would blow up at him but he was so focused on you. The topic. “ What if I just make her drift away!?” Katsuki asked. “Oh wow. I didn’t know that Katsuki Bakugou was such a loser!” Izuku said, knowing exactly what he was doing. “ Yeah what a pussy!” Kirishima yelled, pushing Katsuki’s button. He went to the dance floor and gave the guy a nasty stare. He was getting way too handsy. You only allowed it because you want experience. You’re a virgin, You never had a boyfriend before, zero dates, you haven’t even had your 1st kiss yet, you just started drinking like a month ago, and this is your 3rd time at a club. You dancing with a guy and a bit sexually is NEW. The man stood his ground against Katsuki. That didn’t stop the explosion boy. He leaned down to your height and kissed you. You gave in and kissed him back. The guy saw how you guys were making out. He left. You knew it was Katsuki you were making out with even though you were drunk. You danced the night away. 4:25am hit. “ Let's get out of here pretty.” Katsuki said. You nodded. When both got to his apartment it got crazy. He pushed you against the wall after he closed the door and locked it. You made out like it was the last time you’d see each other again. “ Mhm fuck.” He said carrying you up stairs. He set you on his bed. You giggled as he took your heels off. He smiled at your drunk self. Now Katsuki knows you're inexperienced. “ Kkaattss!” you yelled. “Yeah I’m here,” he replied. He respectfully was babysitting you as you showered. He stood facing the wall asking if you were good. After drying up and changing into clothes he lent he blew  dry your hair and soon after that you were laying on his bed. Still drunk. He was surprised how you even managed to shower thoroughly. He then took his time to take a nice warm shower. “ Kats!” you laughed like an idiot then suddenly went quiet. Once he was changed he turned the lights off and got into bed. “You good?” he asked, playing with your hair. “ Wish. You- were h-herruu actuchily.”you said slurring your words. You touched his hair gently. He pecked your forehead. 
The following morning you woke up to him holding you. “K-Katsuki?” you questioned. “Yeah?”he replied. “W-what am I doing here?” You lifted the sheets, fully clothed. You sighed in relief. “We didn’t do anything…It’s unbelievable,” he replied. “ What is-are you calling me a slut? That I’m easy or something!?” you said you were upset. “It’s unbelievable that you’ve always been in my heart and in my mind. Now you’re waking up here in my bed. You’re mine.” He replied holding you. You blushed. “ I like you so much, kats.” you confessed. “I like you so much Y/n.” he replied. You both felt complete and happy.
Why don’t we- unbelievable
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toxicbg · 3 days
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YOUR BOY — k.taehyun
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warnings: sub!taehyun, camboy!taehyun, possessive!reader, yeongyu are together for plot purposes, reader is lowkey entitled and cocky, mommy kink, ruined orgasm, vibrator, oral (male receiving), inaccurate pegging i was too lazy to write the prep just pretend, kinda aftercare
a/n: i lowkey wrote this high so if you think it’s shitty it probably is.
it was beomgyu’s fault. taehyun would stand by that sentence. beomgyu challenged taehyun, dared him to create an account. it wasn't taehyun’s fault, it was peer pressure.
so taehyun did what beomgyu told him to do, he'd never give them his username. but he was going to last as a "camboy" for a week just as beomgyu dared him to.
he enjoyed it a lot more than he thought.
at first he was tense, trying to act as serious as possible, but once the comments started rolling in, the praise just made him melt. next thing he knew it was a week later and he was whining and shaking with a vibrator focusing on the tip of his cock.
but this one subscriber stuck out the most, always praising him and degrading him in the best ways. he always thought he'd break down if anyone degraded him, but the way they accompanied the words with praise drove him nuts.
while most of him enjoyed this, he'd find himself thinking too much with his friends. hoping that his favorite subscriber wasn't some old bald guy.
"what's got you all spaced out?" soobin’s voice shakes taehyun back to reality. it was saturday, taehyun and the five of his friends were at this secluded area in the woods near the local park.
yeonjun was to his left, throwing his baseball from one hand to the other. kai was on his right, cheering on what soobin was staring at in front of him, book discarded due to the fight to his right. the fight being between you and beomgyu because god knows what at this point.
"can you two go one second without your hands on each other?" yeonjun’s question was rhetorical, but the suggestive under tones had all heads snapping his way. taehyun looks to his friend in shock, yeonjun knew he had a crush on you. why would he say that?
"nope," beomgyu releases his death grip on your hair, smirking down at you. you reciprocate the look before bringing your knee up to his crotch.
the silent area was now filled with everyone's — spare beomgyu’s — laughs. "that was too far," beomgyu groans, letting his body finally fall all the way to the ground.
"y/n, gimme your phone," yeonjun snaps his fingers in your direction, making a "gimme" motion when you look at him.
"one second," you make sure all of your special tabs were closed before handing him your phone, thankful he didn't know much about technology. just the basics and how to use tiktok.
"i'm gonna go take a leak," kai gets up, taehyun muttering something in agreement before getting up and going in the opposite direction.
a few moments pass of silence, beomgyu sitting back up once he regained all his strength, tackling you down immediately after.
"uh, i don't think i was meant to find this..." yeonjun trails off, a laugh escaping him at the sight of the same website beomgyu had dared taehyun to join on the screen.
"holy shit!" soobin laughs, grabbing the phone from yeonjun’s grasp. he started to go through your following, but amongst only seeing one, the three boys decided to stalk him.
"beomgyu! what is it?" you knew what it was, pretty much. a part of you still having a small bit of hope it wasn't that website.
their eyes widen at the sight before them, videos upon videos of a certain boy. one who joined at the same time taehyun was supposed to. this was definitely taehyun, or this boy had a scarily similar room.
now, the video was quite zoomed in, reason on how you hadn't noticed it was your taehyun yet. but, yeonjun and soobin had been to taehyun’s house many times before.
"click it," beomgyu tells yeonjun, his boyfriend looking to him as if he'd lost his mind.
"definitely not."
"why?" beomgyu laughs, pouting when you take your phone from yeonjun’s hands. you groan at the sight before you, maybe from anger that they saw, maybe from the pretty sight before you.
"i'm not letting you see a boy naked," yeonjun rolls his eyes, picking up his book. "besides me."
“cmon, i don't like ta—" yeonjun slaps a hand over beomgyu’s mouth. he wanted to see how this would play out. how you would find out it's taehyun. how taehyun would find out you watch him.
"you don't like who?" kai asks, he and taehyun walking back towards the four of you.
"uh, better question," soobin sets his book down once more, "why'd you two come out at the same time? snogging?"
taehyun looks at his friend with wide eyes. he and kai frantically shaking their heads, causing the other three to burst into a fit of giggles.
"oh yes, because you're in love with someone else. 'forgive me kai, but we can't!'" beomgyu mocks taehyun’s voice, placing a hand over the right of his chest dramatically.
"beomgyu, your heart's on your left," the boy quickly moves his hand at yeonjun’s comment.
"in love with someone else? who?" you inquire, a smirk playing on your lips. while you tried to act your normal, witty self, 'female beomgyu' as you were called by your friends, you mentally frowned at the idea of taehyun liking anyone but you. he was yours.
but so was that boy you watched every night, hand between your legs. but you imagined it was taehyun, he acted so much like him, it was fine.
"none of your business," taehyun quips, a little too snarky for your liking. but you bit back a response, deciding that the pretty boy you'd be seeing later that night would ease your anger.
you didn't talk to taehyun the rest of the night, knowing he hated it. he looked guilty, sad that he hurt you. not that he did, he just pissed you off.
that night you practically pounced on your pillow, sitting with it between your legs as you hurriedly unlocked your phone. you were a big late but so was he, at least he wasted no time, already jerking off when the live started.
you began to grind on the pillow below you, using one hand to keep it in place and the other to give the boy commands. this became a usual thing, you practically being his partner in this. you got to be the only one controlling him, people enjoying it, and what you commanded him to do. and he got paid with everything you did.
it was a win for everyone.
you were still pretty upset with taehyun denying you, ordering the boy on screen to do so many different things in the next two hours, vibrators, dildos, even a cock ring at one point. he looked absolutely spent. his legs were shaking and he couldn't stop the whimpers coming from his mouth every time he moved.
you were finally satisfied after seeing your boy cum over and over again, just imagining it was you punishing him for speaking to you that way, with that tone.
the next day you were woken with a call from beomgyu, saying something about yeonjun and kai having homework and soobin having baseball practice so he, taehyun, and you could go wherever you wanted without their 'supervision.'
you agreed immediately, soobin and yeonjun were practically helicopter parents, you’d take any chance you could to go have fun without them present. not to be offensive.
once you'd gotten dressed, you met the two boys at the end of your neighborhood, having all lived in the same neighborhood your whole lives. that's how the five of you became friends.
"so, y/n," beomgyu starts, throwing his arm over your shoulder. taehyun’s happy face quickly turned to a pout at the sight, even though deep down he knew beomgyu was doing this to get a reaction out of him.
"you look absolutely stunning today," beomgyu compliments, throwing a wink at you. you shake your head with a scoff, pushing his arm off of you.
"cut it out gyu, you have a boyfriend," you laugh, the three of you beginning your journey around town. beomgyu chuckles before grabbing a cigarette from his pocket.
after lighting it and taking a long drag, he said something that neither you or taehyun would expect, "we're both into trying new things."
taehyun laughs at this, clearing his throat when beomgyu gave him a look that told he was being truthful. "didn't expect that one," you giggle, taking the cig from his fingers.
the rest of the day consisted of going to a park, a cafe, and many other places, but at every spot, beomgyu had to stop and tell you just how beautiful you are. and now here the three of you are, at your last stop of the day. you told your friends you had a headache, when in reality you knew your boy was streaming in less than an hour.
beomgyu brushes a strand of hair from your face, "y/n—" beomgyu was cut off by a whine, followed by a quick 'shut up' from taehyun. your eyebrows shot up when the noise came from taehyun’s mouth.
beomgyu smirks at your expression, he wasn't yeonjun, he knew the two of you needed a push before either of you found out about the other.
you furrowed your brows before realization dawned on you, no wonder it was taehyun. a few weeks ago you adjusted your settings to 'near me,' your camboy — or well, taehyun — popping up immediately.
"taehyun, can you come home with me?" you ask him suddenly, earning a double take from the boy. beomgyu rubs his hands together before getting up.
"i need to go...see yeonjun," beomgyu pushes his chair in, slapping some cash down to pay for his side of dinner.
"i thought you said—"
"bye!" beomgyu interrupts taehyun before waving. he didn't waste time dashing out the diner. he was lying, obviously. he'd probably just go home and play a video game with his brother.
you stand up, throwing your side purse on and motioning taehyun to follow you. "why do you want me to go home with you?"
"i change my mind," you push yours and his chair in, laughing when his curious smile falls. "it wasn't a suggestion."
taehyun’s face reddens at your dominance, a light smile returning to his lips. "but-”
it wasn't a question," you repeat, throwing down your money and walking away. you hear taehyun following quickly in suit and you grab his hand before running out the diner.
"s...slow down!" taehyun stutters, attempting to keep up with you. despite playing baseball like the rest of his friends, he still found himself running slower than you. maybe it was the way you were treating him, driving him crazy. not to mention that he was supposed to be streaming minutes from now.
you push him into your empty house, thankful your parents were gone since the night was probably going to go as you thought. your boy wouldn't come on stream in time, proving he's taehyun.
you lead him to your room, practically throwing him onto a nearby chair. the next hour consisted of the two of you on your phones, taehyun occasionally trying to ask you something, but you refused to comply every time.
you laugh when your phone clock reads '11:00 pm,' and the stream never started. not to mention the amount of times taehyun made an attempt to leave.
"taehyun, it's an hour after," you smirk, you'd caught him. you found your boy. taehyun looks at you, eyes blown and a red coat of embarrassment on his cheeks.
"an hour after what?" taehyun gulps, eyes widening when you make your way towards him. you pull up his profile before shoving it in his face. you swore he couldn't get redder.
a whimper leaves his lips, tears beginning to brim his eyes. "please don't tell anyone!" taehyun pleads, hiding his face in your neck with shame.
"as long as i'm in your videos from now on," you smile at him, lifting his head from it's spot. taehyun looks up at you with confused doe eyes, cheeks still red with embarrassment.
"w...what do you mean?" taehyun stammers, his lip trembling. you coo at him, running your fingers through his hair. his eyes began to flutter shut, but snapped open when you tug at his hair.
"i've been waiting to show people who you belong to."
taehyun whimpers at your words, "you've been watching me?" you nod, bringing up your blank profile for him to see. his breath hitches, his top tipper had been you the whole time.
he leaned forward to kiss you, a hand pushing him back into the chair. he throws his head back and let's put a noise of protest.
"i'm in charge here taehyun," the boy — your boy — nods at your words.
"can i kiss you?"
you brush his hair back with a nod, "such a good boy." taehyun squirms at the praise, bringing your body onto his, locking your lips together in a messy kiss.
his hands were gripping your hips, your fingers entangled in his hair. he kept trying to buck his hips up in hopes you'd comply and give him what he wanted, but the two words 'bad boy,' had his lips trembling and his movements stopping.
taehyun backs away from the kiss, the words upsetting him and the lack of air causing his head to spin, and not in the good way you made it spin. "i wan' be a good boy," taehyun whimpers, his chin placed on your chest thanks to your position.
"you do?" your face was plastered with faux sympathy, taehyun was already too far gone to realize this, believing you were being merciful with him. he nods, letting his head fall to the side.
while the sight was adorable, you instructed him to log in to his account on your computer. despite him saying he didn't have his good camera, you promised him that the people wouldn't care, they just wanted to get off.
taehyun was still embarrassed, the feeling only growing when he realized you were going to fuck him on stream.
"why're you all shy now, tyunnie?" you run your hands through his hair. his finger hovers over your mouse, the little arrow hovering over the big button with uppercase 'start streaming' letters staring at him. "y'weren't all shy before when you were showing your pretty cock off to hundreds of people at a time."
taehyun looks at your face, you looked angry, disappointed even. "why are y'mad?"
"because, tyunnie. you're my boy, and you were giving everyone else a show as if you didn't belong to me already," taehyun whimpers at your words, his cock stiffening in his pants.
"m'sorry, mommy," taehyun apologizes, his voice a pretty mix of a moan and whine. "y'better be sorry. y'gonna be sorry," you lean over, quickly pushing his finger onto the mouse, the clicking sound being the loudest noise in the room.
viewers flooded in, all surprised by the sight of not only taehyun, face in frame, teary and red, but a pretty girl right next to him. comments came left and right, 'why didn't you tell us you were so pretty?', 'who's the hottie?', and 'why are you late?' the first one, and many others like it, boiled your blood.
"gonna answer them, tyunnie?" you ask the boy beside you, his eyes never leaving you. a small 'huh' left his lips before he looked to the chat.
"oh," his voice was small, quiet, afraid he'd say something bad and you'd punish him. he watched with glossy eyes as you walked towards you closet, the sight of you bending over causing a groan to leave his lips.
"i told you to answer them, taehyun," your commanding voice rang through the room, comments left and right telling him to obey, as if he'd listen to them. he was too focused on you, and he'd probably get punished if he listened to anyone else.
his focus was on the comments now, trying his best to ignore the sound of things being moved around behind him.
"s...she's my..." taehyun trails off, not knowing what to call you at this point.
"tyunnie here, is my boy," taehyun sighs when you take back control, his mind too fogged with thoughts of you that he couldn't focus on anything else. his eyes widen when he realizes you'd stripped down to your underwear, the lace of your bra and panties clinging to you in the best ways.
you smirk as you read the comments, people interested in taehyun actually being controlled in person, not by a random commenter. your ego just kept growing at the comments, one specific one from one specific person sticking with you. you had to show the viewers what you could do now.
you lean down towards taehyun’s ear, "gonna be a good boy?" he nods, a squeak of surprise emitting from his lips when you slap his cheek. "use your words."
next to taehyun stood you, holding a box with toys, causing the boy's eyes to widen. "are you using that on me?" he asks, his voice high-pitched and barely over a whisper as he points to the blue strap-on that sat on the top. you just give him a smile before ordering him to take off his clothes.
he suddenly felt very exposed, despite being naked and doing various things for, as you’d said, hundreds of people before, your figure above him made him a lot more nervous.
you watched him in awe, he was so much prettier in person. yours eyes widen at the sight of his cock, tip an angry red. he was so much bigger in person, too bad you probably weren't going to be able to have him inside you tonight.
"good boy, always obeying me, hm?" you praise, straddling him. he nods with a whine at the feeling of your clothed pussy on his bare cock. he quickly corrected himself by muttering a small 'yes.'
you smirk at him, your good boy. "m'gonna have so much fun with you. my little toy." taehyun squirms under you from hearing your words, accompanied by the sound of your hand rummaging through the box.
once your hand wraps around your vibrator you bring it towards the camera, your face held something between a smirk and evil smile before you looked back to your boy.
"ready, baby?" you slide your hand down his chest, leaving goosebumps in your wake, a shiver traveling down taehyun’s spine.
"yes, mommy," he makes a fist from frustration, lack of relief. you turn the vibrator on the lowest setting, getting off of his lap and between his legs. you lowered the head of the toy to the slit of his cock, his body jolting at the feeling. his hands gripping the sides of your desk chair, eyes squinted shut as moans and whines left his lips. it didn't make it better when you'd occasionally pick up the vibrator and kitten lick where the toy once was.
"tyunnie?" your voice causes his eyes to fly open, and his head to fall down to look at you. "yes, miss?" he pants, the feeling almost distracting him from being able to talk.
"i need you to keep your eyes open, 'kay? good boys have manners," you tell him before taking the head of his cock in your mouth.
"yes, yes, yes, yes, okay! fuck!" a mix of a moan and a laugh leaving taehyun’s lips. his body felt so hot, the feeling and thought of you driving him mad that he couldn't take it anymore.
"m'gonna cum!" he shouts, throwing his head back. a light slap to his thigh reminding him that only bad boys disobey, his head snapping back down.
"really? but you just broke a rule tyunnie...i don't know if you should," you look at him with disappointment, fighting a smirk when tears brim his eyes.
"m'sorry, m'so sorry," taehyun sobs from both disappointing you and his ruined orgasm. he kept repeating the words over and over, the occasional 'mommy' thrown into the mix.
"get on the bed, taehyun," you command, the boy scrambling up with a sniff and disappearing from the camera's view. you switched the stream from the computer to your phone, grabbing the strap-on that caught your boy’s eye earlier.
you throw the phone down, muting the mic of your phone. "y'okay, baby?" you caress taehyun’s cheek, a rapid nod from him soothing your worries. he felt himself getting closer to the edge just from how you were treating him in this moment, he was so deep into subspace he barely knew anything besides the word 'mommy.'
"okay, baby, m'gonna need you to tell me," you brush the hair sticking to taehyun’s forehead back. "yes, mommy." taehyun whines, with a laugh you slide the harness up your legs.
you grab the camera, flipping it to taehyun and unmuting the mic just in time for you to push into him. his eyes fly open and a cry rips from his throat at the stretch. "y'okay, baby?" taehyun nods, the word 'yes' tumbling from his lips over and over like a prayer.
you began dragging your cock in and out of him, giving him slow strokes to calm him down. his head was lolling, the rule you made completely lost in his mind. you didn't care anymore, the sight before you so pretty, it wasn't worth ruining.
his eyes screwed shut, and his mouth formed an 'o' shape when you sped up, moans, giggles, and whimpers leaving his lips. he felt he couldn't escape you. he could feel you everywhere, hands on his thighs, then his chest, then his arms. the thought and mental image of you floating through his mind.
"m'gonna cum," taehyun breathes out, his voice was raspy. you leaned down to kiss him, camera still focused on his lower half.
"go ahead, baby, cum all over my hand. make a mess for me," you quicken the snap of your hips, sobs leaving your boy as he came all over your hand, some landing on his stomach.
you didn't spare another second on the stream, ending as fast as you could. he was your boy, no one was going to see him longer than they had to.
"thank you, mommy," taehyun pants, a smile on his dry lips that he was repeatedly wetting with his tongue.
"s'not mommy anymore, tyunnie, s'y/n," you lean down to kiss him, the boy bringing you towards him, chanting the word 'more' against your lips.
"no, tyunnie, don't wanna push you," you laugh, slowly pulling out of him. he took advantage of his strength, wrapping his legs around your waist and pushing you back towards him. a moan left his lips when you pulled out completely, leaving him feeling empty.
"time to get you cleaned up," you walk him towards the bathroom connected to your room. you begin running his bath and sat him on the toilet. his head fell back, hitting the overhead cabinet. he furrowed his brows before looking to you.
“you didn't get anything..."
"didn't need it, tyunnie, promise," you grab his cheeks, pressing a kiss to his lips. he laughs, placing his face into your chest and wrapping his arms around your torso.
"thank you, y/n," he kisses the flesh of your breasts, taking your right nipple into his mouth. you sigh at the feeling, combing his hair with your fingers.
"you're welcome, my boy."
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bad idea, right? // theodore nott x fem reader
part 2 for but daddy i love him!
playlist: bad idea right? - olivia rodrigo
"im sure ive seen much hotter men but i really cant remember when!"
summary: you agreed to go out with theodore nott and you did infact go on a date with him! however ever since your date with him youve been doubting your judgement.
y/n used , part 2 , gryffindor granger reader , swearing , mention of dr*gs and alcohol , not proof read
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its been a week since theodore nott confronted you in that classroom. and its been a day since the date you went on with him. it was nothing too special ,just coffee in hogsmeade and overall it was great!!...except from when some guy in slytherin came over asking if theo wanted his 'weekly supply of the good stuff'.
you had almost gagged on the spot. being a muggleborn , throughout all of your muggle education you were preached about the evil of drugs. so when theodore smirked and whispered something to the guy before showing him off.....you got the ick.
and its been 24 hours since then, and youre going crazy about it.
"girls , i cant condone drug use!! that shit is fucked up!" you screeched as you paced a hole into the carpet of your shared dorm.
lavender , parvati and hermione all stared at you with concern , having listened to you panic and rant for the past half an hour.
"y/n we know! but i mean you cant even know that it was what youre thinking! cmon you were the one that protected his character like he was a saint a few days ago!!" hermione argued back, trying to calm you.
"before , i knew he was doing drugs!! WEEKLY!" you cried , collapsing onto your bed as the three girls stood up and surrounded you.
"i mean...whats so bad about that?....the gryffindor guys do it at parties all the time-" lavender started before parvati threw her a harsh glare , making her stop her scentence.
"its more about that its making me question if i really know him well enough to commit to dating him!" you groaned , face down into your pillow.
"y/n i think youre being dramatic! you like him too much and now youre scared. its okay lots of people get like that dont worry!" hermione sympathised.
you paused at this , eyes widenening at the thought that this was likely very true. you did like theodore. a lot. maybe more than you found comfortable. and now you were finding a way to shut out the overwhelming feelings.
at this epiphany you sat up , eyes wide and mouth dropped open.
"youre right mione. i think im gonna take a small distance from him and...firgure it out!.... yeah... figure it out.." you mumbled quietly as you got up from your bed , your friends staring at you wearily , "i mean theres always hotter guys out there and it was always a bad idea...right?".
you looked at your friends with red cheeks and a hesitant expression , they stared back as you took slow steps towards the door before bolting out of it , running down the stairs before they can stop you.
"y/n-!" parvati shouted trying to stop you before the girls stood in stunned silence , "ive never seen someone change mood and mind so quickly..."
"shes going to avoid him , isnt she?" lavander said knowingly as the other two girls noddly grimly.
"yeah...she definetly is." hermione sighed.
----
and that you did! youve been avoiding theodore nott like the plague for three whole days and it was driving everyone around you insane.
ron. he had been walking with you in the corridors , slowly commuting to potions when you eyes spotted something in the distance with great suprise and terror. the next second you sprinted the way you and ron had come from. leaving ron extremely confused and left to walk to potions alone , and getting points taken off by snape when he was the only late person.
harry. you swore that you would watch him practice quidditch and give him pointers on how to improve his technique - you were the old gryffindor seaker before you quick months after joining. but after finding out slytherin and gryffindor were sharing the pitch that day , you never bothered to show up. harry was mad at you for days , knowing the reason was your avoidance of theodore. yet you denied it and said you were ill.
hermione. you were studying with hermione in the library , both of you equally focused on the task at hand , until you perked up at the sound of a deep familiar voice walking towards you and hermiones area of the library. you gasped in suprise before ducking under the table , spilling a pot of ink in the process all over hermione pages. she gasped also , but in pure horror , and thankfully was able to cast a spell to clean the ink before being distracted by someone standing infront of the table you were studying on.
theodore. if anyone could be described as going insane at your constant avoidance , it was theo himself. he had been practically ripping his hair out everytime you avoided his eyes , or walked in the opposite direction when he approached. of course he had noticed , there wasnt a single moment he didnt notice you. and every time you left or ran away , he became more and more desperate.
so now he stands infront of you sister in the library , fist clenched in the deep desperation to see you; to know what he did wrong.
"where is she granger." he said through gritted teeth.
"nott , im actually quite busy cleaning the ink off me , so a little more context to who 'she' is would be great in this moment!" hermione argued in a annoyed tone as the smoothed down her recovering parchment.
"y/n!" theodore replied in more of a shout , making hermione jump and loud hushes echo through the library in response.
"oh!...oh...shes right h- ow!" hermione screeched as you hit her from under the table shaking your head furiously , "yknow what ive had enough of this , you WILL talk to the boy and you WILL sort this out. everyone is sick out it y/n so come out NOW!"
hermione pure fury and demanding tone made you cower at your older sister , before slowly coming out from under the table with deep embrassament.
theo watched as you came out and stood infront of him , head down , "theodore-".
you words were cut short as he grabbed your wrist and dragged you out of the library , avoiding your protests and tugging.
he dragged you in the same manner , through the dungeons and through the slytherin common room , until you reached what you supposed to be his dorm.
then he pushed you infront of him , the back of your legs hitting the wood of a bed frame as you stumbled for balance , watching him pace the room.
"you have to tell me what i did , please PLEASE tell me what i did because i cannot go on any longer with you avoiding me!" he stammered.
you silenty watched as he try to push out his words , the consequences of your actions setting in.
"i-..i got second thoughts-"
"WHY!" he shouted back , walking towards you.
"because - because... YOU DO THE GOOD STUFF!" you finally stammered out as he stared back , dumbfounded.
there was a short pause of silence as he blinked in confusion , "...what the fuck is the good..stuff?..."
"DRUGS!" you finally let out with a sigh of relief , like a weight had been lifted off your chest.
"you-..i-...what the fuck?!" he breathed out in shock , eyes wide , "i- i dont do fucking drugs!"
"oh yeah? then who was that boy on our date? he asked if you wanted your weekly supply nott!" you shouted, angered by his denial.
he stared into your eyes with pure confusion before seeming to peice things together in his mind , his exression dropping.
before he laughed hysterically , holding your shoulder for support.
"what...why...why are you laughing?" you asked, bewildered.
"the good stuff..is..its not drugs!" he let out between loud laughs , "its fucking chocolate!"
your jaw dropped as you stared at you bankly , "what- what do you mean?!"
"this boy in our year - in slytherin - he gets chocolate from his mum every week , he hates it and doesnt want it to go to waste every week..so he gives it to me because i really like it!" he continued to laugh through his explanation as you cheeks reddened in embarrassment.
"what-...i-..who the fuck calls chocolate the good stuff!?!" you screehced in pure shame , theodores wheezing drowing out your feelings as you begin to laugh with him.
after a few seconds of theodore collecting himself he grinned and looked you in the eyes , holding your face softly , making your breathe hitch and giggles cease , "i cant believe you actually thought that.why would i ruin my godly body with that stuff?"
you smacked his arm as he smirked and winked , both of you laughing , "i guess i just...i got scared , truthfully , i like you a lot theo and i guess i was just begging to not...falll for you."
"so you avoided me? rather than speaking to me?" his eyes saddenned as your heart shattered at the sight.
"im so sorry teddy , ive- ive never had a boyfriend before im new to this feelings and- its terrifying it really is!" you desperatly tried to reason to him , words speeding out of your mouth.
he softly ran a hand through your hair , eyes seeping with adorations as a soft smile found his lips, "i know. dont worry i get it. just...dont avoid me ever again - just talk to me, okay?"
you nodded swiftly as he smiled brightly at you.
"now...how about we lay down and just...talk. then you can really get to know me and never misjudge again..sound good?" he whispered.
"sounds like heaven." you smiled back at him , his lips finding yours much softer than your first exchange , with much more love and delicacy.
for the next few hours you did exactly that , talking and talking. you talked about everything- you even told him your favourite film , of course its the little mermaid.
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