#the things that make me happy are things that remind me how insignificant. in the grand scheme of things. i am LMAO 🙈🙈🙈

[cosmictheo]

𝐢 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐚 𝐛𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬 | 𝐧𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐲𝐚𝐦

(gif credits to @peace--n--love)

— summary: ao'nung calls you the way neteyam usually calls you, which makes him feel jealous and insecure, but that finally pushes him to confess something he has been feeling for too long. — pairing: neteyam x female!na'vi!reader — word count: 2k —warnings: pure and comforting fluff, ao'nung being ao'nung (an idiot), love confessions, jealous!neteyam, neteyam being the purest and most beautiful angel.

* Neteyam is aged up, for obvious reasons, of course; he is 19 years old. * Sluyang means flower.

neteyam's playlist i made for inspo

writer's note: english is not my mother tongue, so please forgive me if there is a grammatical error. hope you like it!

You liked to observe the beauty that Eywa gave to Pandora, you were still surprised by how beautiful the forest and the places it could hide, even after having grown up there and having been all those years among its leafy trees, even so, the forest hid secret and beautiful places, worthy of being seen and found by only those chosen ones.

Your mother was sure that you had a special connection with Eywa, practically since the day you were born and opened your eyes for the first time, green as a pair of emeralds. She told you that you had come into the world for a purpose, that you were Eywa's chosen one, in fact, those were her last words to you before she passed away in your arms, haunted all her life by an illness from which she never got better. And since then, Jake and Neytiri had taken care of you, accepting you into their family as if you had always been one of them. You soon became close to their children, especially with Neteyam, as you were close in age.

And because of that special fascination you had for the forest and nature in general, Neteyam made a habit of always bringing you things from his many explorations and hunts, things that reminded him of you; flowers, leaves and even rocks, bright and beautiful, out of the ordinary, that stood out among everything else, just like you.

“You don't have to, 'Teyam.” You always said every time he came to you once again with a new gift. But he would simply shake his head, offering you a charming and gentle little smile, ever so kind, ears slightly bent and gaze so bright every time he met yours that it seemed to dazzle you, leaving you completely mesmerized.

With a coy smile you tried to avert your gaze from his, analyzing the object now in your hands. “Really, it's not necessary.”

“I like to do it.” He would simply reply, seeking your gaze with his big, captivating, coaxing eyes, as if it were something insignificant, something that didn't matter, something that wasn't like the nicest thing anyone had ever done for you. And you would do nothing but grin at him. You couldn't stop smiling, your cheeks felt almost numb, but you were happy, content, he made you happy. And you knew that this, in the long run, would bring serious consequences, not so good, you supposed.

And now, in the huge ocean, when you thought nothing would surprise you anymore, Eywa seemed to turn every assumption you had upside down. Jake had taken you with him and his family to the place where the Metkayina Clan lived, leaving the Omaticaya behind, leaving the shelter that the forest offered you, to now be surrounded by the ocean; salt water and sandy land.

They had been kind enough to accept you into their home and to show you their ways, noting the great difference from your own, but, apparently the younger members of the clan were not as friendly to strangers as the older ones.

Ao'nung had been rather harsh with you, especially Kiri, whom they had addressed as a freak, as they had nicknamed her, and from there, the problem grew larger, for you and Lo'ak had taken up against them in her defense.

“Look at her.” Ao'nung called out, following Kiri like prey, looking at her with big, disgusted eyes. “Is she a freak or something?”

“Don't call her that.” You stated in a not at all friendly tone, scowl and defiant eyes looking up at the chief's son, pointing at him with your index finger and thus causing him to move backwards. “You have no right to call her that, did you hear me? The Chief's son or not, I'll kick your ass.”

With a tilt of your head, you stated the threat, making him snort ungraciously, looking at you with a raised eyebrow.

“For such a pretty little girl, you sure have a big mouth.” His big eyes narrowed as he spoke, demonstrating a smug attitude as he heard a couple of snickers from his little friends at his words. “You are one of us, little flower. Why you waste your time hanging out with these aliens?”

“Hey!” Lo'ak exclaimed, appearing at your side, fists clenched and face angry. “Don't call her that, get away from her!”

“Please, leave us alone.” Kiri grumbled behind your back, hearing how now, you were the target of annoyance from the little group.

Your mouth hung open wide, totally offended now, feeling the fury shake your body from head to toe, your tail wagging angrily as you lunged at him at the same time you heard an 'oh uh' from Lo'ak.

But your movement was halted as you watched as a body larger than yours stepped between you and the bully, leaving you in view of nothing but a broad back you knew all too well and blocking Ao'nung's smug, sneering face from your view.

“That's enough.” Neteyam said in a stern tone, deep voice and tense body, always as diplomatic and calm as ever, braids moving under the command of the wind and his head, which rose slightly, giving him a more stern and much more menacing stance. “As long as we are here you will treat my family with respect and call no one by other than their names.”

His head moved so that he could look at the faces of the little group that had formed, friends of Ao'nung, as silly as he was, apparently, but who, in Neteyam's presence, seemed to have been brought back to reality and put back in their places. They were not so foolish after all, they knew that against him they would have no choice but to flee. Cowards.

“(Y/N) is just fine for you, got it?”

“Whatever.” Ao'nung replied, rolling his eyes and starting to walk, bumping his shoulder against Neteyam's as he walked past him, his eyes met yours for a couple of seconds and he offered you a smirk, making you grunt and by the time you could take a step towards him, a hand found itself on your forearm, stopping any act of violence you had planned to do.

“Cowards.” Kiri spat, rolling her eyes.

When you looked back, Neteyam was looking at you with eyes, dark, but now filled with concern, his fingers barely caressing your skin before he pulled away from your arm.

“Are you okay, syulang?”

You rolled your eyes, sighing heavily. “I'd be better if I'd beaten that skxawng—”

“Hey.” He interrupted you, noticing how your ears were still bent and your tail twitching behind your back and he laid both of his hands on your shoulders now, in an attempt to reassure you, giving you delicate petting strokes. “It's okay, it's all over now.” His gaze traveled to his siblings behind you, moving his head and face transforming to one of authority, chin up. His voice came through loud and clear, almost scolding. “Home, now. You've had a lot for today.”

Lo'ak lifted his hands, looking incredulous. “But they were bugging-”

Neteyam was quick to interrupt him. “Home. We will talk to father later.”

The younger boy let out a snarl and without further ado, began walking back to where his family was staying, followed closely by Kiri, who kept a glum face, arms crossed over her chest.

And now, all of Neteyam's attention landed on you, as it naturally did, as his body always seemed to do instinctively, even though he didn't even intend to, he always focused on you, as if you were the center of the universe, the sun of his world, the core of his heart, the magnet of his mind and the horizon of his eyes. He saw you. He had always seen you. And practically everyone in his family knew, perhaps everyone on the whole planet, except for you, of course.

Neteyam had expressly refused any offer or even, even idea from his parents to find him a Tsahik as his position as the future leader of the clan, it was his duty and it behoved him to follow to the letter the duty that rested on his shoulders as the future chief, but now, all that had been left behind with his leaving. Now all he cared about having was you. All that mattered was you.

With a beautiful sunset behind him, he began to speak to you once again, hands gently running over your shoulders and arms, becoming more attentive, affectionate, but still concerned. His brow furrowed slightly and you knew immediately that a scolding was coming now. “What were you thinking, hm? Fighting them all?”

He was always like that with you, especially when you were alone together. Neteyam never felt he was enough for his father, and he too never seemed to be satisfied of him, let alone see all that his son did for his family, for his siblings and for him, but with you, with you everything was different, he could be different, he could be himself and he knew that was enough for you, you made him feel enough, you made him feel special.

“If that's what I had to do for protecting Kiri, Lo'ak and their family's honor, of course.” You answered immediately and with your words, sounding so sure and affirmative, Neteyam felt his heart be flooded with a most familiar warmth, an emotion quite well-known to him whenever you were near him and said things such as those, always putting others before yourself, putting the welfare of his family before yourself.

A smile tugged at Neteyam's lips, admiring you with bright, big eyes, his hands trailing down your shoulders, sliding down your arms to your hands, taking them between his own tenderly, fingers toying with yours absentmindedly as he watched the clear size difference.

“He called you little flower.” Neteyam stated after a silence of a couple of seconds, twisting his head. His jaw was clenched and ears barely tilted back. “I call you that.”

You bit your lower lip, holding back the smile that threatened to curve your lips at his clear display of jealousy. He was upset about it and you had to reassure him. Your fingers caressed his wrist, tracing imaginary lines down his forearm. “I like it better when you do it.”

“I sure hope so.” He smiled again and tugged on your hand, inviting you to walk with him, both of your hands tangled between his arm, and he didn't waste a second in drawing you to him. “I want to show you something.”

. . .

Neteyam had found the spot walking along the local beach, it was a bit far from the place where his family was staying and it was far from the town in general, but that made it a perfect location. It was a small bay, surrounded by coastal vegetation, a couple of palm trees and soft silky sand, but what was really amazing, was the glows of bioluminescence under the clear ocean water, algae of all colors, small animals swimming, with the sunset light bathing exquisitely over the turquoise sea.

It was beautiful, of course. But your reaction at the sight of it was even better; mouth half-open, eyes huge and amazed, face in wonder.

“'Yam… it's beautiful.” You murmured in a soft, barely audible tone of voice, but he was right next to you, as close to you as possible, so he could hear you perfectly. His fingers were intertwined with yours and he pulled you with him across the sand to the perfect place to sit.

“Yes it is. I found it as I was passing by... I immediately thought of you.” His gaze lowered with a hint of embarrassment flashing across his pretty face. “I know how much you love nature, all the things our great mother has given us, so, I thought, you would like it.” He stated and then shrugged, attitude becoming quite braggy now. “I've seen more beautiful things, though.”

You rolled your eyes, pushing your shoulder against his in amusement as you wrapped your arms around your knees, admiring the scenery in front of you. “Don't lie now.”

“I'm serious.” He laughed, looking up at you, analyzing every expression on your pretty face. “I'm no liar, you know that.”

You raised an eyebrow, turning your head so you could look at him now. “Really, huh? So what have you seen? What possibly have you seen prettier than this?”

Neteyam smiled thinly, stirring his arm lightly, his hand passed down your back, resting on the sand, fingers fiddling with it. “Something prettier than this?”

“Hm.” You hummed, looking at him curiously.

His ears perked up, gaze dropping to his lap, steeling himself inside, trying his hardest to calm the nerves that were practically eating him alive. And then, he moved his eyes up your body, until he met yours. “I'm looking at it right now.”

Your breath hitched and your mouth parted, feeling your body freeze. Your arms fell to either side of your body, adjusting your position.

“Nete…” You whispered in a shaky voice.

“Yes, sluyang?” He tilted his head softly. “I'm being honest.” He swallowed saliva, his hand trailing up your arm, caressing your shoulder and tracing your jaw, down to rest on your cheek, fingers tracing every inch of skin he could, arranging your hair and tucking it behind your ear. “I've always seen you as the most beautiful thing…” His lips trembled, faltering for a few moments. “I see you, (Y/N).”

You closed your eyes and rested your forehead against his, nuzzling his nose against yours. “I see you too, Neteyam.”

He closed his eyes too, caressing your face with his. “When that idiot called you flower and treated you that way… like you were nothing.” His hands cradled your face now, and you rose up to face him, completely silent, breathing agitatedly. He was breathing in an agitated way too, looking frustrated, disturbed. “I was furious. They should respect you. Every one of them should know that you are mine and they should treat you as such, as my equal, as my mate.”

You opened your eyes to find his eyes already on you, your fingers stroking his arms subconsciously. Your lips brushed his as you opened your mouth to speak in an agitated voice. “I want to be yours, Neteyam.”

“I can't pretend anymore.” He declared between shaky breaths, gaze traveling between your eyes and mouth as he shook his head. “I don't care what anyone else says, I don't want anyone else. I have already chosen. I just want you, (Y/N)... I was made for you.”

“Then just take me.” You murmured against his lips before joining them with yours in a needy, agitated kiss that felt as if everything at last, made sense, as if life had been created just for this moment, as if you had been brought to life just this moment, for each other.

It felt as if all the constellations had aligned for you, as if you had all the stars just for you, and that was given just once, you knew. Everything made you feel as if Ewya had created you for each other. You were made for each other and perhaps the Great Mother had aligned the whole universe for it, for you.

“I am yours.” He promised. “I always have been.”

Your legs tangled between his as you landed on his lap, being drawn in by his arms chaining themselves around your body, massaging your waist, tattooing his touch on your skin.

“Forever.”

#avatar x reader #neteyam x reader #neteyam x y/n #neteyam x you #neteyam imagine #neteyam one shot #neteyam sully #sully family #neteyam x female!reader #neteyam x f reader #avatar: the way of water #avatar #avatar: twow #neteyam sully x reader #neteyam x female reader #neteyam #na'vi reader #lo'ak sully #cosmictheo

[itsvelyria]

"non-sexual acts of intimacy with the f1 boys"

Charles Leclerc

being there for each other. after a bad race, you'll be right there in the garage waiting with open arms or his phone will be lit up with a bunch of messages from you. a bad day at work? he's running a bath with your favourite sandalwood bath salts and your fluffiest towel is hanging on the heated rack. he is one constant presence you can always count on to be there, to smile at you and tell you it's going to get better, and vice versa.

Carlos Sainz

he finds comfort in physical contact, that means his hands are either on your lower back guiding you through crowds, or on your thigh during midnight cuddles on the couch, or simply just interlaced with yours. his family and friends are used to him drifting away from them, weaving through people to drape his arms over your shoulders from behind in greeting. he likes the reminder that you are right there with him, grounding him.

Danny Ricciardo

he loves your mornings together. being an f1 driver doesn't get him a lot of days at home so when he does, he enjoys waking to daylight slipping through the cracks of the curtains and slipping out of bed to make coffee for two. the aroma wakes you up and when you pad into the kitchen, rubbing your eyes, he thinks he might be the luckiest man in the world to be able to witness it. oftentimes you two sit there in silence, just relishing in each other's presence and sharing a quiet moment.

George Russell

its the little things he brings back from every trip or every outing, the excuse of "it reminded me of you" rolling off his tongue. the chrysanthemums outside the flower shop he passed by, the strange pink shell he saw at the beach. he shows them to you with such pride, the tiny burst of happiness in his chest when you laugh and admire the present, turning it over in your hands. every present he gifts another reiteration of your significance in his life and just how often he thinks of you throughout the day. what could be more of an indication of love than that?

Lando Norris

children at heart, you two love teasing each other — his messy curls that are sticking up in all directions when he wakes or the light foam moustache on your upper lip from the cappuccino you just drank. but you never take it too far and he finds it easy to just be himself around you, to be able to laugh everything off. its the intimate level of comfort and understanding that shines through all your playful banter and jokes that makes him never want to leave your side.

Lewis Hamilton

he really loves hearing you talk, it's like music to his ears whenever you're telling him about the bus you missed or raving over your new favourite song. the man hangs onto your every word, letting them sink in as he gazes at you with lovestruck eyes. and he's always there with the perfect response — how to deal with a difficult client at work or just filing your words away in his album of you in his brain.

Max Verstappen

remembering the littlest most insignificant things about you. he got you a first print copy of your favourite book after 3 months together and since then, he's surprised you every so often at just how much he knows you. sometimes orders for you at cafes and restaurants because he knows exactly how you pick items on the menu. you once told him about how you hate cracked phone screens so he has a bunch of them in his drawer and changes them for you. the sight of him squinting while trying to line up your phone screen makes your heart swell with adoration.

#f1 imagine #f1 headcanons #f1 fluff #f1 x reader #formula 1 fluff #formula 1 x reader #charles leclerc fluff #charles leclerc x reader #carlos sainz fluff #carlos sainz x reader #daniel ricciardo fluff #daniel ricciardo x reader #george russell fluff #george russell x reader #lando norris fluff #lando norris x reader #lewis hamilton fluff #lewis hamilton x reader #max verstappen fluff #max verstappen x reader #my writing #itsvelyria #formula one fluff #formula one x reader

[vigilantethot]

random headcanons about being Miguel O’hara’s housewife <3

Pairing: Miguel O’hara x fem! Reader

this is mostly SFW

Disclaimer: This is my first fanfic I’ve written in yearsss so pls be easy on me haha. Also the reader is black coded. 

It’s no secret that Miguel works too much. He is under tremendous stress all the time, so it makes total sense that he needs his home to be a safe space, and a calm sanctuary. 

Its also no secret that Miguel is a control freak. He has a schedule that he MUST abide by or he’ll go crazy.

As his wife, you have a HUGE part in his routine.

Miguel takes pride in providing for his loved ones, and early into the relationship he told you he wanted you to have to worry about nothing, to just do whatever your heart desires whether its art, reading, or just laying in bed all day. 

When you first got engaged to Miguel, it was super hard to get used to his schedule, it seemed like he was never home, and you often found yourself feeling useless and insignificant to him. 

Upon communicating this with Miguel after he was late for dinner the third time that week, he instantly made changes to accommodate you into his life. You were his life after all. 

He quickly made sure to start including you in his day, even if he’s at work. The last thing Miguel wants is for you to feel useless, and he would do anything to make you happy. 

Treating you like a princess makes him so happy. Everything you want, you get. Miguel has more than enough resources to cater to your every whim.

Found a new hobby that you’re going to spend hundreds of dollars on only to get bored of it and keep the supplies in your hobby room to collect dust? Sure, go ahead and get everything you need, he just wants you to find your passion!

Now lets get back to the routine: 

You two always started your days in bed, limbs tangled, your head on his chest, his hands rubbing your back.  

After a quick cuddle session, and maybe a little more than that, you two make your way to the kitchen, where you brew coffee, make his breakfast, and discuss your plans for the day. 

Miguel never leaves for work without kissing you at least three times, he says its to “clear his head.”

Miguel likes to keep tabs on you all day. He is a very possessive and overprotective man, and he will go to great lengths to ensure your safety. 

He's constantly texting, asking what you’re doing and how you’re doing. Always asking if you ate (if you didn’t you would be in BIG trouble, it seriously pisses him off when he thinks you’re not taking care of yourself.)

He also has a few cameras in your house, for “safety”. Mainly its just to watch you throughout the day to admire you/check in on you. 

He also always has your location, just in case. 

Miguel calls to check in at least twice a day. Hearing your voice and hearing you talk about the fun things you’ve done calms him, and reminds him why he works so hard. 

You really don’t mind how overbearing Miguel can be, he makes you feel loved and safe. 

Miguel loves to hear about your excursions throughout the day. You just got your hair done? be prepared to send him 100 pictures, and he will save every single one. 

Seriously, his camera roll is just you. 

You went shopping? He wants you to model everything you got, even if its just a bonnet. 

He loves anything you do to your hair, whether its a sew-in, braids, or just cutting it all the way off. He’s so lovesick he would still look at you with heart eyes if you had a bowl cut.

Before he met you, Miguel would never leave his work under any circumstance. But on the days where you go to the salon and look so pretty, he couldn’t resist taking a long break just to see you in person. Of course your fresh hairstyle would be tousled and unkempt by the time he’s done showing his appreciation for your beauty. 

When Miguel gets home, his full attention is on you. 

He loves to come home to you, with your apron on, music playing and the wonderful smell of whatever you made him for dinner. 

After showering and putting on cozy clothes, you two enjoy dinner and just talk about anything and everything. His eyes full of love and adoration as you tell a funny story about something that happened to you that day. 

He always helps clean up after dinner, often splashing you with water of putting soap bubbles on your nose while washing dishes. He can only show this side of himself with you, and that’s why his love for you grows more and more each passing moment. 

After dinner, you two normally unwind on your huge, comfy couch that he custom ordered just to be able to accommodate the both of you. 

You two spend the evening cuddling and watching TV, with him pressing lingering kisses on your neck until he takes you into his huge arms and takes you to bed, where the night can continue ;)

A/N: feedback? requests? message me :)

#miguel x reader #miguel o'hara #miguel x you #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o'hara x black reader #spiderman x reader

[abibliophobiaa]

Chapter Five: One Bed

summary: you and eddie have to share a bed, and things start to take a new turn. (7k words)

eddie munson x pregnant!reader || strangers to friends to lovers, unplanned pregnancy, and then they were roommates, forced proximity.

masterlist | previous chapter | next chapter

——

“Just a warning, these nights get loud,” Chrissy expressed, maneuvering around where you sat near the kitchen island, bouncing Melody on your thigh. “And just think, in a few months we’ll have another little girl here to add to the chaos.”

“Don’t remind me,” you groaned, already dreading the idea of getting her out once all was said and done. “I miss the days when we thought storks delivered babies to your front step.”

“It’ll be all worth it once she’s here.” Chrissy giggled airily at that, placing bowls of chips around the table, tutting when Melody’s hand reached out to try and grab some. “How are things going with you and Eddie? Living together, sleeping just down the hall from one another…”

“I don’t know what that look is in your eye, but it seems diabolical,” you mused, taking a sip of your water perched on the table beside you. “Him and I are friends.”

“Friends who seem very cozy as of late.”

“We’re living together and…so what if we enjoy the company of one another —” You paused as her lips curled into a devious smirk. “— not in the way you’re thinking. We just spend a lot of time together lately.”

“I think the way he dotes on you is sweet,” she said, reaching her hands out to grab Melody. Hoisted the baby up onto her hip. “You know he talked about you a bunch after Halloween. You must have made a good impression on him.” She sing-songed the latter half, a mischievous little glint in her eye that looked out of place on her sent your way. 

Flashes of that night danced across your vision. Those brief introductions at the table. The way you’d spent hours talking and laughing with one another. The moment beneath the awning where you’d almost kissed. Food shopping with him. His fingers on your form as he undressed you, inside you as they drew out your pleasure, mouth hot and fervent against your own. The way he mapped your body later with his lips, how he’d lavished you with his words as he rolled you beneath him that second time, your hands tangled together in bed sheets near your head, eyes locked on yours as his hips rolled into yours.  

The night was seared into your brain. Imprinted on your mind. Intimate in a way you’d reeled from, a spark different than anything you’d had with Paul — or anyone for that matter. A complete stranger, and yet something had felt so different that night. So ‘impression’ deemed too insignificant of a word to express what that night signified. 

For one, it marked the beginning of something new, now nestled within, just beneath your breast. 

“I just think it’s less complicated this way,” you added, glancing down at your midsection. “She’s most important. She needs both of us.”

“And what about what you want?”

“I’ve had enough run-ins with love to know it’s likely not in the cards for me,” you told her sourly. 

“What if it’s just a matter of you not having met the right person?” Chrissy asked, placing Melody in her high chair. “You know, before I met Steve, I’d been dating someone else. My parents loved him. On the basketball team, town golden boy, involved in his church and charity. Perfect, by their standards. But what they didn’t know was that we fought — almost every day. He didn’t make me happy; or I thought he did, until I met Steve.”

“You never told me how you met Steve.”

“At a roller rink,” she giggled, glancing over your shoulder to where her husband and the father of your own child were drinking beers together in the living room. “He’d bumped into me. Literally crashed into me. We spent the day with me icing my head and him icing his cheek. But we talked for hours. And he was funny and sweet and charming and I just knew it was him. Right away.”

“That’s — that’s really sweet, Chrissy…”

“How does Eddie make you feel?” 

And there it was. The question you’d been avoiding, because it meant admitting to the fact you simply weren’t sure. You knew you liked him, but liking him meant putting yourself in a vulnerable situation.

“We’ve only known each other a couple of weeks —”

“Time doesn’t define the importance of something, silly,” Chrissy said, dropping down onto the chair beside you. “Right now, at this very moment, how does he make you feel?”

You glanced his way. And, like he always seemed to, he had this uncanny way of knowing when you needed him. Ever present, with that seemingly constant glowing smile on his face from over Steve’s shoulder where he sat. A question burned behind his gaze, but you shook your head, and he relaxed back against the couch no longer on alert. 

“Good. Heard. Seen. Cared for,” you rattled off, wanting to cover your face with your hands. Wanting to hide from the gnawing fear burning in the back of your mind over the reality of it all. “But it doesn’t matter, because what if we try and it doesn’t work and now Elena has two parents who don’t even like one another, or can’t even stand to be in the same room together?”

Chrissy curled a hand around your shoulder, those bright eyes of hers meeting yours sympathetically. “What if we imagined the reverse? What if none of that happens? You won’t know if you don’t try.” 

Another time, another place, another day — those had been the words spiraling in your mind the day you left him back in his hotel room. Another person — someone who would offer him the rose-colored glasses, the giddiness of relationship, the joy of love. He was deserving of so much; the world, really. 

“I’m not just saying this because he’s my husband’s best friend,” she started, voice lowering into a quieter whisper, “but he’s a good man. The best of the best. What if you opened up to the idea of…simple like? Not even love.”

What if you opened up to the idea…to simple like? Could it really even be simple? It seemed like such a juxtaposition to your current reality. Yet, the words knocked around in your head all the same, wonder already forming in the catacombs of your mind at the mere possibility. 

However, before you could give it any life, the thought was disrupted by the doorbell, to be shelved away for later. 

  ——

  The arrival of the fondly named “kids” came with an air of chaos. Friends who traveled from near and far to come visit, all wrapped together in one room. Max and Lucas, on holiday here in Hawkins, now residing in California together. 

Will and Mike arrived a little later, holding hands and a package of Oreos that you immediately opened and snacked on, much to their shared amusement. 

El, who you had previously met, was visiting her step-brother Jonathan and Nancy in the city — the same woman you’d already contacted, thanks to Eddie’s suggestions, and were now waiting to hear back from. 

Their initial reactions to finding out about Eddie being Elena’s father were met with amusing degrees of excitement and many questions — but overall, they were all over the moon for him. It made your chest ache to see him so happy, the way he proudly talked about his daughter before them all, the fondness behind his eyes as he spoke. 

You remained at his side through it all, overjoyed to simply be there with them, laughing when they’d dove into a story about a time Steve, Robin and Eddie had taken the kids camping, and Eddie and Steve had the not so brilliant idea of trying to spook them before bed. 

“To be fair, we were only fifteen at the time,” Mike explained from beside Will. “Which should really show you what these assholes are capable of —”

“Hey, watch what you’re about to say,” Eddie began, waving a finger in Mike’s face. “That is your mother and father you’re talking about.”

“Who’s mother?” you asked, laughing when Steve pinched at the bridge of his nose. 

“Steve’s mom,” Robin explained, appearing in the doorway with Vickie. “And your guy over there is dad.” 

Neither of you bothered to correct Robin on that comment. 

“So maybe we’d told them a little campfire story about bears in the woods before bed,” Steve started, curling his arm tighter around Chrissy’s shoulders. “What’s the problem with that?” 

“Well,” Dustin interjected, leaning out of his seat from where he sat next to his soon to be bride. “Here’s the thing — we were on high alert. Started stocking up in case we needed to fight off a bear.” 

“Wasn’t our fault Eddie is an idiot and started growling outside of our tent and maybe got sprayed in the eyes with hairspray,” Max said, bursting into loud giggling when Eddie cringed beside you, as if recalling the memory like it had happened moments ago instead of years ago. 

“That shit hurts, okay?” Eddie grumbled, and you patted his kneecap teasingly. 

“The scream he let out,” Lucas added, and the rest of the group laughed in agreement. 

“I do not scream.” 

“You do, man,” Steve said solemnly, earning a glare from his best friend. “It was so loud. Thought the police were gonna be called.”

“Sorry,” Eddie began, rolling his eyes, “who was it that used Farrah Fawcett spray in the first place? Because that’s where these little asshole gremlins got it.”

“Hey — it works!” Steve shouted. “Don’t knock it until you try it.”

“Steve, my friend, I walk out of the shower and my hair looks like this. I don’t need products to enhance what I was naturally blessed with.”

“Bet you’re doubting your decisions to procreate with him now, aren’t you?” Mike joked, flicking his gaze between the two fighting men. 

But you only laughed, because you weren’t doubting it at all, but instead thoroughly enjoying yourself.  Especially now as Eddie interrupted their stories meant to embarrass him and suggested they maybe start their game before it got too late and they’d have to call it a night. 

Eddie on a normal day was…breathtaking, beguiling, intriguing. Different from most you’d ever encountered in all the best ways imaginable. Appreciated for all he was simply because he marched to the beat of his own drum. He loved life and enjoyed it to its fullest. He never once put on airs, tried to be anyone but his fullest self. Had accepted Eddie Munson as Eddie Munson years ago. 

You’d known as much from conversations with Steve, Chrissy and Robin over dinner. Eddie’s face bright red in a blush whenever they recounted stories from their younger years. And over the span of several weeks, you’d gotten to know it for yourself as well. 

Eddie was Eddie. 

Perfectly, wonderfully atypical. 

But seeing him like this — in his element, surrounded by his loved ones, weaving a tale that left you enraptured. Left you leaning out of your seat, as if lured by some unseen vision, his words wrapping around your heart. Your mind. 

Chrissy grinned to herself at the sight. A little flash of it you’d seen, twisting those pretty pink lips. But you’d chalked it up to the fact Eddie Munson was a natural born storyteller. Inspired by the many books his mother had read to him as a young boy, even now. Even so, what a lovely thing? To be graced with it so intimately like this, to see his inward love so outwardly on display. 

Later, after the campaign had wrapped up and everyone left for the evening, you sat beside Eddie in the passenger seat of his car. Regarded his face illuminated by streetlights as you passed them by. Glimmers of dark eyes, full lips, those freckles cheekbones. 

Long, torturous moments passed in silence, fueled by Chrissy’s comments and insinuations. Fueled by the questioning of what would happen if only you played the tape deck forward. Would you crash and burn or take to the wind and soar? Would you risk it all for the sake of your own want, or play things safe for the needs of the third party in this increasingly complicated situation? 

“Are you —”

“Can we go somewhere, Eddie?” 

You’d both spoken at the same time, laughing awkwardly as you’d done so. Rushed utterances of the first things that stumbled into your minds. Eddie’s ringed fingers gripped the steering wheel tighter, shifting onto the side of the road with his right blinker. 

Once settling the car into park, he shifted in the seat your way, worried lines marking his forehead. “Is everything okay?” 

“I just…” What did you want, though, really? “I’ve been having a hard time sleeping.” Not quite a lie, and yet not also the full truth as to your whirring thoughts. 

“Do you want to go for a walk around our neighborhood?” he suggested, turning the car back on when you’d nodded. “I know you mentioned you were having a hard time a little while back, but I didn’t realize how bad. How long has this been going on?”

“Couple of weeks,” you grumbled out, leaning your head against the window. “Doctor said insomnia is another thrilling side effect of all of this.”

“I’m sorry,” he huffed out, though it was hardly his fault at all and you both knew that, drumming his thumb along the steering wheel. “You could have told me, though. I’d have tried to help you.”

You shrugged, shifting on the seat a bit so you were facing him. Noted the determined line of his lips, his bare arms moving as he steered. “Where are you going? This isn’t the way home.”

“I’m thinking we need dessert for our walk,” he said, the turn signal clicking as you waited to make a left turn into the parking lot. “Chocolate?”

“Mmm Oreo sounds really good right about now.” 

“So I have something to ask you and I know it’s kind of out of the blue and last minute and I meant to ask you beforehand but we had Steve’s today and it kind of got pushed to the side.”

“Is this why you’re buttering me up with a milkshake?” 

“Maybe.” He said, a little teasing glint in his eyes, the red stop light bathing his skin in the bright glow. “Okay, so, Wayne’s place is getting work done. Something with a burst pipe and he can’t stay there for a couple of days.”

“So you want me to stay with Robin or something —”

“No, no,” he urged with a hand on your forearm. “I just need the guest room for a couple days.”

“Oh, okay.” You nodded, considering. “I can sleep on the couch for a few days.” 

“What? Sweetheart, no. I’m not — I’m not making my pregnant —” He paused, catching himself, swallowing thickly. “I’m not making you sleep on the couch.” 

“Yeah, but I’m not taking your bed,” you argued, “so I guess we’ll have to share.”

The words spilled out in a rushed breath. You’d not even really thought about what you said until the words were already there, out in the open, exposed for the taking. 

“I mean, we’re adults,” you continued, shrugging. “We can sleep in the same bed without it being weird.”

“Okay,” he said, nodding evenly, mulling over your words, “that was easy then. You’ll sleep in my bed. With me.”

And that — that had your stomach turning. Twisting in that giddy, roller coaster, butterfly type of way. The way that had your fingers curling around the edges of your seat as Eddie parked the car and rushed into the opened diner to grab the two of you your sugary treats. 

He returned as your heart settled back into normal rhythm. Opened your door and thrusted your drink into the air, muttering, ‘For the lady’ with a bow that had your cheeks heating up.

It only took another few minutes to pull up in front of Eddie’s home, your door opening so you could hop out as soon as he’d shifted it into park. Tugging your hoodie tighter to your body, you walked along the sidewalk and waited as he hooked his keys onto his belt loop, locked the car, and joined you beneath the street lamp. 

“After you,” he said, practically bouncing on his heels as you began your loop around the neighborhood. 

“You know, there are so many stars here than back in the city,” you muttered after a while, pausing with your drink outstretched in hand, head tipped back to take in the sky. “It’s just another thing I don’t really miss about back home. I feel so much more…I don’t know, connected? To myself and those around me. Without all the hustle and bustle.”

“Never thought about that,” he breathed out, hand guiding you closer to him on the sidewalk so you wouldn’t stray too far into the road. “I guess it’s easy to take for granted when I see it all the time.” 

“Did you know there are two to four hundred billion stars in just our galaxy alone?” You tilted your head over your shoulder, catching the way the moonlight illuminated Eddie’s features. “And there are something like hundreds of billions of galaxies. Fun things you pick up when you work at a high school library.”

“I did not,” he admitted, lowering his head to take you in. His eyes lingered on your face, on the lines of your lips, and you swallowed the thick knot forming in the back of your throat. “Anything else you learned while at my old high school?”

“The worst lunch days are definitely Wednesday,” you sounded off, sipping your drink, “O’Donnell always has mustard on everything while we have lunch and Elena hates it. Which means I hate it. Uhm, they definitely need a wider selection of novels, and their cataloging system could use some major work. Oh — and the vending machine near the nurse’s office has the best snacks.”

He laughed, a bright, happy sound that had you nearly bouncing on the balls of your feet. “Sounds about right.”

“You know, tonight was actually really fun.” You tipped your drink lid into his chest, smirking slightly. “I saw a different side of you tonight.”

He followed as you trailed onward again, the sound of his shoes pounding against concrete to keep up in your ears. “A good side? Come on now, sweetheart. Can’t leave a guy hanging like that.”

Nose wrinkling, you snorted. “I liked it. You had a very…commanding presence. The kids enjoyed it, too.”

“So she likes commanding —”

“Hey —”

“Kidding, kidding.” Eddie held up a hand in surrender, waving his cup in the air with a big flourish as you halted on the sidewalk in front of him to allow him to catch up. “Honestly, I’ve been doing that for so long, it’s become something I look forward to. Back in high school I’d run the club, and that’s when I ended up meeting the guys. Mike, Lucas, Dustin and Will. Took them under my wing a little bit — you know how it is, teenagers are shitty.”

“Teenagers are shitty,” you agreed, sounding a little morose. “I was lucky to have Micah at that point. So it never felt like I was alone. But those years can be isolating. I can’t imagine. I’m sure they were so happy to have you there for them.”

“Yeah, well…they’re now attached to Steve and I. Like our own little band of shithead gremlins. But we love them.” 

“I can tell you do,” you said, thinking back to when Max had hugged him goodbye and he’d patted her head. Looked up at him like she’d admired him. “They love you too. The way they talk about you is really sweet.”

“Now they’re all grown up,” he said, rubbing at the back of his neck. “Which reminds me…Dustin is getting married in a week and he suggested today that I might ask you to come with me.”

He looked at you out of the corner of his eye. A nervous little bounce in his step. Noticed that he’d dragged a hair along his lip, trying to hide himself from you. 

A knowing smile creeped along your lips. “Like…as your date for the afternoon?”

A date — you could do a single, solitary date with a friend. 

 He glanced down at his feet, exhaling deeply. “Yeah, exactly like that.”

“I’ll have to buy a dress,” you said quickly, putting the poor man out of his misery, “but I’d love to.”

“Okay.” He nodded, grinning softly to himself. “Ah, awesome. Perfect. Can’t wait.”

You continued like that for a while. Simply walking beside one another, talking about anything and everything beneath the stars. Simply basking in the presence of another person as the moon glowed brightly above. 

Eventually, when you’d finished your shakes, you both decided to head back to the house, but neither of you seemed keen to separate for the night. 

Eddie spoke with you on your bed, your feet in his lap, his hands rubbing at your sore calves, until you started to doze off against your pillow. 

Stayed with you until you finally fell asleep. 

  ——

  Wayne was on his way out of the house for the afternoon when you whirled around, Eddie’s apron tied around your waist, your sous chef beside you with his hair pulled back. You’d been working together for an hour now, making penne alla vodka that you couldn’t help but lean over and smell the sauce that was currently simmering in a pot. It should be illegal to smell so good, you thought, hip brushing Eddie’s as you moved around him to grab the shredded cheese. 

Tonight was the first night of your arrangement. Sleeping beside Eddie in his bed. Platonically. No funny business to be had by any means. Sure — Wayne would be working the night shift and gone for most of the time you’d be sleeping beside Eddie, but you’d cleaned out the guest room to allow for him to sleep in there, making sure the man knew this was his home as well as yours. 

Not that you’d had any say; nor could you quite pinpoint the moment when Eddie’s home had become yours too. Found yourself saying things to him in conversation when out and about from time to time, simple remarks of “let’s go home” and “oh, it’s at our place” and even the night you’d walked under the stars with Eddie, back in the car, when you’d said “this isn’t the way home.” 

And even so, here you were, hosting at the place you called home with Eddie. 

Weird to think how a few weeks had changed everything. Nearly twenty-three weeks along, and living with Eddie for a little over a month now.  

“You two went out of your way to do all of this for me?” Wayne mused, chomping at a piece of garlic bread (that didn’t make you run for the toilet this time, luckily enough), seated across from the two of you when you all finally settled down for dinner. “Didn’t have to do that.”

“You’re going into work,” you said, offering him a grin, “we wanted to make sure you were fed.” 

“Thanks little lady. Ed.” He took another bite and picked up his fork, nodding his head your way. “How is my grand baby treatin’ you?”

“Pretty much moving all the time now,” you sighed, Eddie pouring you another glass of water when yours emptied. “Eddie will have to show you her room. He did an amazing job with it.” 

“I’d love to,” he agreed, clapping his nephew on the shoulder. “And thanks for letting me stay with you two. Sorry to steal your bed.”

“It’s fine, seriously!” you huffed out with an amused snort, pushing your chair back as you finished up your plate, reaching over to grab Eddie’s as well. “Do you want me to put a pot of coffee on?”

“Nah, this here is fine,” Wayne said, polishing off the rest of his plate and adding it to the plates you began running water over. “I’ll grab some when I get to work. You two have a good night now.”

As Wayne slipped out for the night, you raised the dial on the radio Eddie kept in the kitchen. An older Frank Sinatra song was playing, hands buried deep within the sink, when he’d sidled up to you and began drying the dishes you laid into the drying rack. 

You hadn’t even asked him to, but it had become a routine of sorts as of late. These little things he’d do, if only to spend a little extra time with you. That foot rub last night as you watched a movie; the lingering hug in the doorway last night before bed; helping you fold laundry on laundry days; the delighted way he’d rubbed the knots out of your shoulder after work simply because he said you deserved it. 

You worked in comfortable silence. Each time you finished a dish, you handed it over to Eddie, and he placed them in their proper storage places. It wasn’t long before you’d finished, and the music still played between the two of you, a soft and gentle tune that had you humming to yourself.

Neither spoke as you shut the light after leaving the kitchen. Nor as he offered you the bathroom to change, and you slipped inside the small, dimly lit room with a shaky exhale. Hands rested against your lower back, feet carrying you back and forth along the carpet, eyes catching on your reflection in the mirror. 

This was stupid — wasn’t it? He’d seen you fully bare before him before, and he’d enjoyed what he’d seen. And yet, the prospect of slipping into a pair of sleep shorts and a tee shirt had your heart racing. With shaky fingers, you reached down and plucked your sweater up and off your body, pausing at the sight of your form reflected back at you. 

He’d liked you before. But you wondered what he thought when he saw you now, every day feeling a little less like yourself, body a home to someone else as of late. Then again, it didn’t matter, you reminded yourself. Just because you’d developed feelings for the metalhead didn’t mean he’d felt the same. 

With a deep sigh, you snatched the Corroded Coffin tee you’d plucked from your dresser and pulled it over your head, and then reached down to tug on some pale sleep shorts. Once satisfied, you finished up your normal bedtime routine and slipped back down the hall, knocking on Eddie’s bedroom door for entry. 

“Come in,” he called out, and your eyes immediately zeroed in on the bare chest that greeted you near his bedside table. 

He was tucking away a pair of his socks into the drawer, head turning over his shoulder, eyes widening at your appearance. You mentally cursed, feeling self conscious. 

“What are you wearing?” 

“A shirt,” you groaned, rushing over to your designated side of the bed, wanting to get the night over and done with. 

“Why do you sound upset?” he asked, dropping down onto the bed behind you, palm coming up to curl around your shoulder, rubbing it soothingly. “What did I say, sweetheart? I can’t fix it if you don’t tell me.” 

He grimaced as you shoved a pillow over your head. “You just looked at me funny. I know I don’t look the way I did the night we hooked up —”

“Hey hey hey, breathe.”  You groaned into your pillow, the sound muffled by Eddie’s laughter. “I looked at you ‘funny’ because there’s a ridiculously pretty woman wearing a shirt with my band’s name on it, who happens to also now be laying in my bed, okay? And remember what I said that night? You’re out of my league — that’s still true now.” He paused, feeling your shoulders relax a bit at his light hearted, if a little self deprecating, joke. “Come on, Buttercup, look at me for a second, okay?”

You rolled over in the bed, pillow falling with it, and he lowered himself down onto an elbow, running a constant and comforting line across your bicep. “Looking.”

“Just — you’re wearing that,” he repeated, toying with the hem of the shirt to stretch the logo across your chest. “The matter of my attraction to you has never changed, if anything it’s…grown because I don’t think you realize what it does to a man when he looks at the woman carrying his child, and now that same woman is laying in his bed.”

“Oh,” you squeaked out, cheeks heating rapidly. “Okay.”

“Yeah — oh, sweetheart. Wanted to make that clear, so there’s no confusion here.” 

He rubbed at the back of his neck, tops of his cheeks flaming red, moving over to his bathroom. Pleasure swooped low in your belly — curled, tumbled and spread it as you caught him adjusting himself in his pants on the way. 

  ——

  “Nancy sent in one of my children’s books,” you said, crawling into bed on the second night, tugging the blankets up and over your shoulders. Eddie slid in beside you, head resting on the pillow, hair spilling in a halo around him. “She said it was really good. She thinks I should hear back soon hopefully.”

“It is really good,” he reassured, rubbing your arm comfortingly. “I wish you could see that. I’m so damn proud of you.” 

“I don’t know.” You shrugged, shuffling closer to him. “My ex, Paul, kind of — well, he didn’t think writing was something one could turn into a career. Kind of discouraged it, which is why I’d put it on the back burner for a while. It’s hard to think that it could ever turn into anything. Or it was…until I found out I was pregnant. And suddenly everything changed. I want to do the best for her, be the best for her.”

He thumbed along your bicep, offering you a soft smile as you continued, “One of the things I admire about you is how you’re just…unabashedly you. There’s only one Eddie Munson and he’s just who he is and you’re literally watching your dreams come true. It’s made me realize it can happen for me too.”

“First of all, your ex is an idiot for not encouraging your dreams. I hate how society says if it’s art you’re interested in it’s not practical and not valid. Sometimes I wish I could give a giant fuck you to all the teachers who said I wouldn’t amount to anything because I preferred music over school,” Eddie started, those umber eyes catching yours in the lamplight. “But I’m glad you’re trying because I don’t doubt for one second that you have a gift. I believe in you.”

“Can I hug you?” 

“Always, Buttercup.” He shuffled even closer, his stomach pressing into yours, dark eyes glinting with vibrancy. “Looks like there’s some di —”

“Do not finish that sentence!” You laughed, shifting until you were comfortable enough, forehead pressing into the curve of his chest, arms looped tight around his waist.  

His eyes softened then, lips settling into a firm line. “Look, I know — I know we didn’t plan for this to happen the way it has, but our little girl really has the best mom.”

“You really think so?” He hated the sound of your voice. The lack of confidence behind the tone. Felt his heart cleave down the middle. 

“Absolutely. Why…do you doubt that?” Eddie frowned as you tugged him closer, fingers twined in the back of his shirt. 

“I…my parents weren’t around much. Always too busy, too worried about other things than quality time spent with me,” you admitted, chewing on your bottom lip. “I’m afraid when she gets here I just won’t know what to do. Won’t know what she needs when she’s crying, or how to change her diaper, or how to tell what she’s thinking. I didn’t have an example of all of that, so what if I’m terrible at it?” 

“Can I be honest?” Eddie asked, tipping your chin up with a finger. 

“Shoot.”

“I’ve never changed a diaper. Or been around a newborn other than Melody. Even then, I’d kind of waited until she was less fragile to hold her. I’m scared as shit, too,” he said, locking eyes with you. “So we’ll figure it out together, okay?” 

“Okay.” You weren’t alone. Despite everything, you weren’t alone. Eddie and you would figure everything out as a team — two people navigating the unknown. 

“Also, we can’t change how we grew up. But we can make sure we try harder for Elena to give her the best.” 

“I don’t know how you do it,” you said, pressing your fingertips against his sternum, feeling his pulse race beneath. “Always knowing what to say.” 

He chuckled, a low, raspy tired sound. “I'm flattered you think that, but I’m just figuring it out too, you know? All I know is I’ll never be the way my dad was to our daughter, and the rest I’m sure will come along with her just being here.”

He paused, glancing down to where the two of you were connected, saying, “You have me.”

“You have me too, Eddie.” 

  ——

  Tossing and turning. Eddie felt you tossing and turning all night, annoyed huffs of breath falling from your lips every time you flipped over onto the opposite side to try and get comfortable. He’d realized quickly you never did, though. 

“Hey,” he whispered, testing to see if you were presently awake. A displeased groan fell from your parted lips, body flopping back over so your face was mere inches from his on your separate pillow. “Can’t sleep?” 

“I’m uncomfortable,” you admitted, mouth turning downward in a sour frown. “It’s not even like I’m not tired. I know I’m tired, but my mind feels all restless. And so is she.” 

At that, Eddie pulled back the comforter and lowered his head to your middle, palm spreading over the hill of it. “Hey, behave in there, okay? Your mom is trying to get some sleep.” At your laughter, he shifted back onto his pillow. “Turn over.”

“What?” 

“Turn over. I’ll rub your back and we can talk until you fall back asleep,” he said, immediately noticing the curve of your brow in confusion. “My mom used to do that all the time when I’d have nightmares. Figure it’ll work the same.”

“But you need sleep,” you argued, knowing he had taken an extra weekend shift tomorrow at the shop that he needed to be up early for. 

“I’ll make an extra cup of coffee in the morning. Right now though, we both need sleep,” he stated plainly, “but I won’t be able to if I know you’re unable to.”

With an exasperated sigh, you rolled back over, hips wiggling very innocently as you got comfortable, and yet in a way that had Eddie swallowing the thick knot in the back of his throat. 

The past few days, being so close, sharing a bed — he’d said it would be easy, a simply platonic situation, but he’d felt anything but. Wanted so badly so many times to lean over and kiss you, to see if he nudged that part of your neck he’d discovered on Halloween night you’d make those pretty sounds he’d strum from you over and over again. 

But he knew better. Respected your wishes and boundaries. Knew he wouldn’t press the matter unless you decided you wanted to take a leap again. He’d decided it from that moment weeks ago now, where you had suggested the two of you remain friends for the sake of Elena. The ball would remain in your court; forever, if you’d decided that was what you wanted. 

With a thick swallow, Eddie raised his fingers up to your trapezius muscles, fingers curling around the breadth of them, thumbs digging into the space below. At the first deep exhale from your lips, he rubbed in circles, watching as your body slowly melted into the blankets further, breathing becoming deeper. 

“Eddie?”

“Yeah, sweetheart?”

“What’s your favorite color?” you asked, and his cheek twitched. 

It became a game of sorts these few weeks. Various questions intended for getting to know one another. Either him or you would pick a question or a topic and talk. Sometimes for hours a night, simply listening to the other. Eddie could listen to you prattle on for ages — had known as much some weeks ago now. 

“Red,” he said, palms sliding down the planes of your back, grin curling upward at the breathy moan that left you. “What about you?”

“I’m not really sure,” you admitted, curling your palm beneath your head. “It kind of changes every day. Lately it’s yellow, but tomorrow it might be cornflower blue.” 

“Cornflower blue, huh?” he chuckled, fingers digging into your lower back. 

He mentally berated himself when your hips arched backward a bit, nearly falling into the cradle of his lap. Now wasn’t quite the time to get a hard on. It had been bad enough having to slip out of bed before you woke each morning before you realized the effect you had on him — an effect that went far beyond normal morning wood. 

“What is one thing you wish you spent more time doing as a child?” 

Eddie paused for a moment, chewing at his bottom lip. “I…maybe I’d have taken more pictures with my mom. I’d always been an asshole when she tried, especially when I got older. They always came out so blurry. The few pictures left of her I have are like that.” 

Your fingers reached backward to circle his wrist, pausing him in his movements. “I’d like to see them sometime.”

“Definitely,” he promised, resuming his massage. “What about you?”

“Mmm, reading more books, probably. Funny, seeing as I’ve worked in a library setting for a few years now.” Your head turned over your shoulder. Eddie’s breath hitched at the softness behind your eyes. “If you could become a superhero, how would you like it to happen? Like…what’s your origin story. I feel like I’d want to have, I don’t know, realized I was impervious to fire or something. Would be pretty cool.”

“Easy,” Eddie said, mouth tipping into a smirk, “I plug into my amp, get a little electrocuted, get electric powers.”

“A true rock god.” You giggled, and it sounded like wind through the chimes you'd installed on the front porch. A swift punch to his gut, a hand wrapped tight around his heart. 

You continued like that for another half hour. His fingers dragging long lines over your back, your eyes closed as you tossed question after question into the open air. Eventually, you began to drift. Body pulled further and further into an oncoming rest, yawns spilling from your gently parted lips. 

For a while, you remained silent, and Eddie wondered if you’d fallen asleep. But you flipped over to face him, closer now than you had been before, and curled your palm beside your face. Close enough he could reach over and brush his lips along your every knuckle. Wanted to, he realized. 

“If you could change that night. Halloween. Would you?” 

He watched the worry as it crossed along your features, the fear over his answer to your question plaguing your mind. The question you’d been building up to with all the lighter ones. Exhaling deeply, he reached over and brushed his fingers along the back of your hand, head shaking slowly. 

“No, because I’d have never met you. And with Elena, it’s not what we planned, sure. But…in getting to know you, I care about you so damn much, Buttercup. I like waking up to you humming in front of the coffee pot, waiting for it to finish brewing. Or when you yell at me for tossing something colored into the whites. I like cooking with you in the kitchen and I even like our couch talks when I rub your damn feet.” Your eyes, glittering with unshed tears, flickered up to his face, and he brushed the moisture collecting there from your bottom lash line. “You’re one of the most important people in my life now, I hope you realize.” 

“You’re one of the most important people in mine,” you whispered back, lacing your fingers with his. “I think the massage worked, by the way.”

He smiled, watching your eyes start to droop a bit. “Tired?” 

“Mhmm,” you hummed, fingers tightening in his. 

A long sigh spilled from you, eyes shutting, and he immediately missed the sight of them. The glow of your irises in the dark, uniquely yours, and strikingly beautiful. Gentle fingers lifted to run along your cheek, your breathing starting to even out a bit, becoming deeper with every passing second. 

“Can I ask you one more question?” It was spoken quietly, so softly Eddie had almost nodded off himself when you’d finally asked. 

“Anytime.”

“Can you hold me?” 

Hesitant, you sounded so hesitant, fear of rejection evident in your voice. Another reason why he hated Paul. Because you’d deserved the world and he’d gone and taken advantage of your heart. 

“Always,” he reassured, heart racing as you rolled over and shifted backward a bit, his own body coming to rest along your spine. Like this, your backside rested in the cradle of his hips, your head rested along his bicep tucked beneath a pillow, and his arm swooped low around your belly. “Is this good?”

He ached with the warmth of it. With the way you leaned down and nuzzled your head further into his arm, the way your body fitted perfectly against his, how you felt so relaxed and comforted by simply being near him. Beautiful. You were so damn beautiful, like a fucking angel in his arms, and he realized how lucky he was.

“Goodnight, Eddie,” you whispered.  

With you in his arms, his hand splayed over where his daughter grew, he realized what he really held in that bed. 

“Goodnight, sweetheart,” he whispered back, dropping the softest of kisses to your temple. 

His family — not the one he’d been born with, and maybe not the perfected image of one, but family all the same. 

He’d never take that for granted. 

  ——

please let me know what you think. it quite literally makes my day, as well as other creatives, so just throwing that out there. i also have just loved talking to you all every week. it’s been the best. also, stay tuned for next week, with chapter six titled ‘the date.’ getting closer to the end here. 🩷🥹

#daylight!eddie #lunaloveseddie #eddie munson x reader #Eddie munson fanfiction #eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x f!reader #eddie munson x pregnant!reader #dad!eddie munson x pregnant!reader

[simp4wom3n]

The Quiet One Pt III

Pairing: Tara Carpenter x fem!reader

Summary: After moving to New York with Tara to escape their past, y/n finds themselves desperate to keep her girlfriend safe, especially when a new killer is on the loose. ~ Word Count: 7.526k ~ Warnings: Scream VI spoilers, graphic descriptions of blood and gore, swearing (I think that's everything)

A/N: Hi!!! part 3 is finally here!! i'm sorry it took so long I have actually been so fkn busy its a lil painful I won't lie. This one also took a while to write so hopefully you guys like it - and yes there will be a pt 4 coming soon. &lt;3

Pt1 ~ Pt2 ~ Pt3 ~ Pt4 ~ Pt5

A packed frat party with dizzying lights and deafening music wasn't the typical place you chose to reflect, yet here you were, sitting on an old couch, drink in hand, dressed in a pirate costume with your fellow crewmate nowhere to be found.

Moving to New York was easily one of the better decisions you had ever made. Escaping the small town of Woodsboro that provided you with nothing but nightmares felt like a breath of fresh air. As a matter of fact, the only thing you were glad that Woodsboro gave you was Tara.

You had been dating since your shared 3-day nightmare over 6 months ago, and your relationship grew stronger every day. That was at least until something shifted. Something in the way Tara looked at you had changed. The usual squeal of happiness at the sight of you was replaced with an almost irritated sigh. Your presence becoming more of a burden for the girl than a blessing.

Sure, you were overprotective. How couldn't you be? She was quite literally all that you had left. Sam, Mindy, Chad. They were all there, but none of them knew you like Tara did. None of them loved you like Tara did.

After the two of you were Richie and Amber's 'pin cushions', you ultimately decided you were sick of being the loner that everybody could take advantage of. The small, insignificant girl that everyone laughed at and made fun of. The weak punching bag that gets stabbed and shot on repeat.

Instead of relishing every opportunity to be alone, you now practically hate to be alone, the horror of the attacks leaving deep and permanent wounds. You rarely distanced yourself from Tara. When being with her was impossible, going to the gym with Chad was your next best option.

Although you didn't see the point at first, you quickly realised that the extra muscle would not only help you regain the strength you'd lost due to your extensive wounds, but it would also improve your ability to protect Tara, or more specifically, beat the shit out of anyone who tried to touch her.

Unfortunately, your overbearing need to protect Tara landed you in this position. Painfully reminded of what should be by Mindy and Anika's cuddling less than a few metres away from you, you blankly stare at the array of drunk teens in front of you, singing and swaying to the music whilst probably eyeing up their next hook-up.

"You alright there, y/n?" Anika's sweet voice breaks you out of your drunken haze, your sour mood and distant stare evidently not as concealed as you thought. "Yeah, fine... I'm getting another drink" You chug the rest of your drink, the poorly mixed liquid burning the back of your throat as your face scrunches at the taste, before you push yourself up off the couch, not particularly interested in a drunk heart-to-heart conversation.

Stumbling your way through the crowd, mumbling "excuse me"s and "sorry"s to every person you bump into, you make your way towards the kitchen to steal what was left of the cheap liquor.

Your muffled apologies were cut off when a strong shoulder barged into you, almost knocking you off your feet. Your drunken gaze quickly turns towards the inconsiderate asshole who ran into you, your face scrunched in annoyance until your eyes catch a glimpse of a familiar bandana.

"Tara?" Her clearly intoxicated eyes met yours briefly as she was dragged through the crowds, her arm being pulled by a dude you presumed to be an egotistical frat boy. Every ounce of alcohol left your system as you sobered up instantly, your feet quickly following their trail despite having to shove past a few unhappy partygoers.

"Tara!" you exclaim as you catch up to them on the stairs, where Tara walks in front of the jackass, willingly leading herself into an inevitable death trap. Her head turns to face you, a look of disappointment on her face that you try to brush off. "She's good down here." You sarcastically smile at the boy, grabbing Taras's arm as you gently try to pull her back down the stairs.

"Come on, let's go" "No, y/n... It's fine, I want to" "Wha-" "See y/n... she wants to" The douchebag smirks as he firmly grabs ahold of Tara's other arm, forcibly dragging her up the stairs as she loses her footing. Her grunts of pain cause every last bit of your patience to evaporate as you run up the stairs after her.

"Get your fucking hands off her!" you yell violently, yanking him down the steps by the shirt. His back collides with the wall, forcing him to stumble before regaining his footing and charging towards you. "Get the fuck off of me!" he yells, but you hold your ground. "You want to go motherfucker? Ok." Tara's protests from behind you go unheard as you uppercut him hard in the chin, his head jerking backwards as he falls to the ground in agony, blood spilling from his lips.

"Touch her again, and I'll send you to the hospital next time", You threaten him, your eyes catching a glimpse of Sam appearing out of the crowd, a slight smirk on her lips at the scene in front of her - she loved the new you.

"Y/n?!" Your focus is stolen from your moment of victory as you turn around and are met with a furious Tara. "Are you fucking kidding me?!" She scoffed in disbelief, shaking her head before she carelessly pushed past you, her shoulder bumping into you.

"Dammit"

"Tara! Will you stop?" you called after her as she continued walking quickly away from you, the rest of the group following behind you. Was the punch a little overboard? Maybe, but at the end of the day, that dude had it coming.

"I cannot believe you did that.", she yelled at you, her tone laced with irritation. "That guy was a dick. He was going to take advantage of you!" "So?!". Your jaw dropped as she finally faced you, her face purely showing frustration. No sarcasm, no guilt, nothing. You couldn't believe what you had just heard. The thought of Tara consciously allowing herself to be dragged away by some guy that would undoubtedly take advantage of her, or worse, infuriated you.

"So?! What the fuck do you mean so?!" "Maybe I didn't care because at least I would finally get away from you!... I mean, look, y/n... you're looking out for me, I get that, I appreciate that, but you never leave me alone unless it is physically fucking impossible for you to be there... you have to let me go." Her harsh tone softened the more she spoke, perhaps realising the words that were falling from her mouth as she stared into your tear-ridden eyes.

"Let you go?" you grinned wryly as tears streamed down your cheeks. "How do you expect me to do that, Tara? I love you... You are literally all that I have left. You are all that I care about. I-I moved to fucking New York because of you, like... I-I can't."

Despite Tara's gaze softening at your cries, your heart cracked as you realised that you were hanging onto her by a thread. Uncontrollable sobs began to escape you as your hand attempted to keep them in. A mixture of embarrassment and guilt washed over you as you turned on your heels and ran off towards the apartment you, unfortunately, shared with the gorgeous girl you were running away from.

In times like these, you resented the fact that you shared a bedroom with Tara.

Before you ran away, you thought you saw a flash of guilt in Tara's eyes, a thought which helped somewhat soothe your racing thoughts as you verged on the edge of a breakdown.

She was right. She always was. You never left her alone, that was true, but you couldn't let her go. You just couldn't. It had been months since Dewey was brutally taken from you, and you still have nightmares about it. She knew that. She was the one who used to comfort you when you would wake up in a cold sweat, the pictures of Dewey lying dead on the floor fresh in your mind.

You used to think you had no love to give, but now it seemed you had too much.

The rest of the group had returned to the apartment shortly after you barged down the door with tears streaming down your face. You had taken cover in Sam's room, knowing that Tara would similarly seek the comfort of your shared bedroom once she got home.

When you heard the front door slam shut and the shuffling of footsteps outside the closed bedroom door, you shot to your feet as you checked over yourself in Sam's mirror, hoping to wipe away the remnants of your recent meltdown, the weight of Tara's words still pulling on you.

With one last deep breath, you turned the door handle slowly and softly, a slight creak escaping its worn hinges. When you poked your head around the corner, you noticed your bedroom light was on, and the door was wide open, which you took as a sign of Tara's presence.

Slowly padding softly across the wooden floor into the living room, you spot Mindy sitting on the couch as Chad and Sam move around the kitchen. Mindy's kind eyes land on your dishevelled figure as you sluggishly approach her, falling back into the sofa next to her with a distant look on your face.

"You alright there, matey?". Your brows furrowed slightly at Mindy's odd choice of wording before realising you were still in your pirate costume. You chuckled slightly as you wiped at your eyes, your head nodding subtly as you gave the girl a small smile.

You sat silently for a moment, the sound of cupboards opening and closing echoing from the kitchen as Chad appeared to be searching for something. "Go talk to her.". Your eyes shifted back to the girl sitting next to you, a knowing look on her face as she smiled at you gently. You glanced toward your bedroom, watching Quinn exit the room before Chad entered, closing the door behind him.

Your jaw clenched slightly as your gaze returned to Mindy, a hesitant look on your face. "I don't think that's a good idea." You spoke softly, knowing she was upset because you wouldn't leave her alone, so there was no point. "Oh, come on, you know you want to. Just go. Go, go, go." Mindy shooed you off the couch and towards your room, your eyes landing on the door as if you were about to enter your worst nightmare.

Your hesitancy to enter caused Quinn to beat you to it, opening the door suddenly, mumbling something about her phone. You stood back, waiting for her to leave so you could try and talk to Tara. Or at least that was your plan until you heard Quinrn say something that made your heart sink.

"Did I cockblock you?"

The rest of the conversation from the room didn't help as your eyes were welled with tears. What the fuck was Chad doing with Tara in your bedroom for Quinn to say that. You harshly bit your lip in an attempt to calm yourself, an attempt which failed miserably as Chad exited the room and saw you, his face immediately stricken with guilt.

"Fuck this"

Before he could put together some fake apology, you were already turning around and bolting towards the front door. Grabbing your jumper and keys from the nearby hooks, you slid your shoes on as you shakily undid the many locks keeping you trapped inside this godforsaken apartment.

Ignoring the worried look from Mindy, when you finally got the door open, you practically jumped out of the apartment and slammed the door behind you.

Sobs wracked your body as you ran down the decrepit stairs and out the door onto the dark street. You knew it was prime time for a Ghostface attack, but at this point, you were happy to be the live bait.

Dragging your heavy feet up the winding stairs, your energy has completely depleted after your last hour of wandering through New York's streets. You didn't even have the power to think coherently, your mind completely blank as you scaled the stairs towards your apartment.

After aimlessly staring at your feet as you trek towards your door, you only pick your head up once you reach the top of the staircase. The front door was wide open. An unfamiliar figure stood in the doorway watching the TV whilst what appeared to be your entire friend group watched with them.

Sniffling and wiping away the tear tracks from your cheeks as you stalked towards your door, you entered slowly and rounded the male figure, a person you now recognised as 'the hot guy next door'. You looked at him queryingly before your eyes scanned the rest of the room, everyone looking glaringly concerned.

When your gaze finally lands on the TV, your heart sinks as you read the headline. Another ghostface attack. "What the fuck is going on?" your voice causes everyone's heads to turn towards you, some of them unaware of your presence until now. Your posture shrunk even further as everyone glared at you - some were soft, whilst others were deadly.

"Where were you?" Tara asked, a mixture of anger and concern laced in her tone. You hesitated. You didn't feel like voicing to the whole room how you had walked around aimlessly whilst sobbing and attracting weird and worried stares from random people.

"Just on a walk. Needed some fresh air." Your voice was quiet as you spoke, your eyes never leaving Tara's. She noticed how red and puffy yours were, how tears had stained your cheeks despite your blatant attempt at hiding it.

"Impeccable timing", you heard Chad mutter quietly, probably thinking you wouldn't hear it. Your gaze shifted to him as you looked at him insulted. The fact that he was even insinuating that you could have had something to do with it made your blood boil.

"Pack a bag. We leave in ten." "Sam, wait, Sam!". Sam walked quickly into the kitchen, Tara hot on her tail. You were too focused on the idea that now, because of your sulking, everyone in this room no longer trusts you. Tara might not trust you.

With a blank stare, you drag yourself further into the living room before collapsing on the couch Tara had previously occupied. You instantly brought your knees to your chest and buried your head in them, tears beginning to resurface as it appeared the world hated you more than ever.

Surrounded by Tara's perfume, you tried and failed to wrap your head around the returning nightmare that was brewing. Not only were you losing your grip on your beloved girlfriend, but you were now likely about to face up against another psycho who wanted nothing more than to see your and your friends' bodies dead in the ground.

As Tara and Sam's argument migrated back into the living room whilst Quinn phoned her dad, the sound of Sam's phone ringing echoing through the room caused you to flinch, your body beginning to involuntarily shake.

When she hung up on the caller, you breathed a sigh of relief. Unfortunately, your relief was short-lived, as you noticed Sam's face drop after she talked to Quinn's dad. She hung up the phone with a sorrowful yet determined look on her face, "I have to go to the station", she spoke as she moved to leave the apartment.

Before anyone could stop her, she was out the door, yet your eyes shifted towards Tara's sporadic movements as she searched for her jacket. "I'm going with her", she finally spoke after noticing everyone's questioning eyes.

As she reached the apartment door, she looked over her shoulder at you expectantly, almost anticipating that you would follow her. On any other day, you would, but at that moment, you selfishly decided that you were too hurt to follow after her.

After all, she didn't want your protection. Right?

You missed the look of disappointment on her face as you averted your eyes from her, instead choosing to focus on the TV. Clenching her jaw and nodding subtly, Tara turned back around and ran down the stairs after her sister.

You soon realised that letting her go was one of the worst decisions you had made to date.

They had been attacked. Of course, they had been attacked. The one time you let your emotions get the better of you, Tara almost ended up dead.

You knew the world hated you.

When you had gotten the call from Quinn's dad about the attack, you had never run so fast. You sprinted straight down to the station, desperate to see your girlfriend and make sure she was ok, even if she didn't want to see you.

When detective Bailey finally released them, you sat anxiously in an old and uncomfortable chair at the entrance to the station, your leg bouncing vigorously as your teeth dug into your bottom lip.

The sound of approaching footsteps caused your head to whip upwards, your eyes landing on Tara and Sam, visible injuries nowhere to be found on either of them.

You got to your feet quickly, standing impossibly straight as the girls finally reached you. You took a second to scan Tara, double and even triple checking that she was ok. That she wasn't hurt.

You wouldn't forgive yourself if she was.

Releasing a shaky sigh of relief, you softly nodded, whispering, "I'm glad you're ok", before turning on your heels and heading towards the door. Tara's face scrunched slightly at your behaviour, unsure why your usually confident and over-the-top personality was so... dull?

She kept her gaze on you as she followed you out the door, only to be surrounded by a bunch of reporters. Microphones and cameras were shoved in your face, and questions were hurled left and right.

You had to fight the urge to put your arm around Tara's shoulders, your head and heart at war as you still failed to comprehend how Tara felt. Whether she still loved you or not. Whether she would welcome your touch or not. You had no idea.

With the end of the sea of paparazzi finally in sight, you were seconds away from escaping until a familiar voice filled your ears.

"Gale Weathers. Channel 4."

The three of you simultaneously spun around with shock and disgust on your faces. "Do you ladies think you're the reason the Ghostface killer has come to the big apple?". You scoffed at her words, earning a raised brow from the woman.

Sam humourlessly chuckled in disbelief before you watched her swing a punch at Gale. The crowd of press gasped as Gale somehow dodged the hit altogether, a smug smirk making its way onto her face. "Nice try, sweetie, but I've done this dance before."

Your want to wipe that smug smile off her face was satisfyingly fulfilled as Tara punched her straight in the face, knocking her back as another gasp filled the air. You couldn't help but smile as Gale turned around, her mouth agape while holding her cheek.

"Stay away from us.". Regardless of your current problems, you had never felt more in love with Tara as she walked away without another glance in Gale's direction. The smile still lingered on your lips as you moved to follow the girls away from the cameras. To your dissatisfaction, Gale followed.

Listening to Gale try to justify herself for writing about what happened in Woodsboro all those months ago just made you more infuriated. 'Those fuckers can die in anonymity' is what she had said.

Yet look at her now.

When Sam mentioned what Dewey would think, you immediately tensed up, your gaze dropping to your feet as you sucked in a breath. Knowing that any mention of Dewey's name triggered you, Tara's gaze momentarily lingered on you before she returned to the conversation.

You zoned out of the rest of said conversation, only picking your head back up when Sam and Tara started to walk away. You watched as they headed towards a taxi while you began to walk back to the apartment.

"Y/n? Where are you going?" Tara's soft voice caused you to turn back, her eyes questioning you as her brows frowned slightly. "I-I was just gonna walk home... you kn-" "Get in." Tara interjected, earning a surprised look from you. "I-" "Y/n, get in the damn taxi." "Ok."

Just like before, she still had complete control over you. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn't say no to her. You watched as the two sisters entered the taxi before you rounded the car and followed on the other side. With the three of you in the back seat and Tara in the dreaded middle seat, avoiding physical contact with Tara was impossible as your shoulders and thighs brushed against each other.

Nothing but the faint hum of the radio filled the backseat as the vehicle drove away from the station. This distance, or lack of it, between you and Tara, was both comfortable and unsettling. You hadn't taken your eyes away from her hand, conveniently situated on her thigh, barely inches from yours.

The need to grasp her hand grew too strong for you to resist, so you gently brushed her pinky finger with yours before proceeding to intertwine your fingers. You mentally sighed at the softness of her delicate hand as soon as it was within your grasp.

Holy shit, you had missed her touch.

With the back of her hand facing upwards, your fingers gently moving against her knuckles, you studied her scar, which had served as a daily reminder of what the two of you had gone through together.

"I'm sorry I wasn't there... I should've -" "It's ok." Your eyes finally met hers as she gave you a warm smile, reassuringly squeezing your hand. "But what if you got hurt?" "I didn't... that's all that matters." Your eyes had begun to water slightly, the guilt of letting her go resurfacing as you looked her dead in the eyes. She gently leaned in and kissed your cheek sweetly before allowing you to rest your head on her shoulder.

Maybe everything was going to be alright after all.

"Ok nerds, listen up."

Mindy's monologue. A staple of the so-called 'franchise' you were tied up in. The whole friend group gathered on the grounds of your college, preparing to hear the numerous rules that undoubtedly come with the new title of this fucked up nightmare you were all living.

"Rule one! Everything is bigger than last time."

Great. Already off to a fantastic start. As Mindy began to explain what that meant, you grew increasingly concerned, not for your own safety, but for Tara's.

"Rule two! Whatever happened last time, expect the opposite."

Even better. Now, It apparently made no difference whether you had gone through this once before or not. To be honest, the idea of a serial killer following the conventions of a movie was still absurd and utterly terrifying to you, knowing full well what kind of fucked up shit happens in horror movies.

"And Rule three, no one is safe."

If your heart wasn't already racing, it was now hammering out of your chest as the gravity of the situation became clear. Tara shifted next to you at Mindy's comments, evidently similarly disturbed by the new rules.

But what frightened you the most was what Mindy said next. "Any of us could go at any time... especially Sam and Tara.". You had never felt so sick. You could feel beads of sweat dripping down the back of your neck as you nervously turned towards your girlfriend, fear overtaking your features.

Her eyes met yours briefly with a matching look of concern as Mindy started listing out the suspects. You had to admit Mindy was really good at this whole monologue thing, naming all the apparent suspects and their motives with ease.

That was until she looked in your direction.

"And finally, y/n.". You looked at her with wide eyes before your head rapidly scanned everyone else to see if you were the only one who didn't expect this. "The jealous girlfriend of the Tara Carpenter... who is also now, apparently, jacked.". You shook your head in denial. There was no way this was happening.

"Mindy, w-what? How come I'm a suspect? I mean, I was there for Woodsboro like you guys were... w-why?" you said, gesturing to the so-called 'core four' completely confused. A sense of betrayal was beginning to rise within you as Mindy continued to look at you with an almost sympathetic smile.

"Never trust the love interest," she said, shrugging her shoulders. "And besides, you have literally nothing to lose." Your mouth fell open. You inhaled sharply to keep your tears at bay, the comment being a ridiculously low blow from someone who typically looked out for you. "No parents, no Dewey. Even before the Woodsboro attack, you had no friends."

"Mindy!?" you heard Tara protest from next to you, clearly upset by her words. You sat in silence for a moment, processing what Mindy had said, and as much as you hated to admit it, she was right.

"No... she's right," you spoke sadly as you nodded your head, "But that's also why it wouldn't be me. I love Tara. I couldn't do anything to hurt her... ever.". You could feel Tara's eyes on you as you stared at Mindy, practically begging her to believe you, not that it mattered, seeing you weren't the killer.

But as far as everyone else was concerned, it very well could be you.

You were still slightly shaken from the group conversation a few hours ago, the realisation that you had nothing to lose playing on your mind as you sat on the couch with Anika. The 'core four' were too busy laughing whilst preparing dinner in the kitchen, whilst you spoke drearily with Anika.

"Have you guys talked about it?" Anika spoke, referring to your fight with Tara the other night. She did her best to comfort and guide you through your suffocating thoughts, your heavy bags under your eyes speaking volumes after another sleepless night. "Not really, no." "Why not?" "I don't know... We haven't really had the time, but I'm also just scared to bring it up."

Despite your new tough(er) exterior, you were still just as soft on the inside as you were before your meek existence got flipped on its head. "Well, I know for a fact that she loves you, and you love her. Your Y/n and Tara, you'll power through." Anika speaks softly, a playful smile playing on her lips as your head bobs gently, letting her words soak in.

"Yeah, well. I sure hope so." You finally move your gaze away from the girl sitting across from you, your tired eyes now landing on the TV screen as the news plays. Just as you begin to relax and enjoy the rest of your night, a new headline flashes across the bottom of the screen, erasing any traces of joy from your face.

'Sam Carpenter Named as Prime Suspect'

"Um, guys?" you shouted from your seat, loud enough to reach the others in the kitchen, whilst leaning forward to grab the remote. Turning the volume up as you hear footsteps enter the room behind you, your face scrunched in confusion as a video of Sam plays whilst the reporter's words make her out to be a psycho.

You risk a glance behind you. Sam's expression was completely blank as the light from the TV flickered on her face. You felt bad for her. You truly did. You struggle to grasp the fact that your friends didn't entirely trust you, and here she was with the entirety of New York being told she was the killer.

You were so preoccupied with the idea that the news dared to make this a story that you didn't notice Tara's eyes shifting to you. Her gaze has been drawn to your worn face. Your ordinarily bright eyes were heavy and unfocused as you stared in bewilderment at the television. She felt terrible about what she said to you a few nights before, and her heart only broke when she discovered how much damage her words had caused.

When Sam hastily turned the TV off and left the room, Tara's eyes left your figure briefly as she watched her sister move to sit solemnly at the dining table. She sighed defeatedly, the effects of Ghostface on the two of you shining brighter than they ever had before. Tara spared you one last worried glance before she followed her sister out of the room.

Chad and Mindy ultimately followed the girls, leaving you and Anika in stunned silence. The air in the room became unusually silent, the old pleasant chat between the two of you suffocated by the apartment's new tension and terror.

You sunk deeper into the couch as you pulled your legs up to your chest, the thick air ultimately releasing slightly as the sound of laughter flowed through the living room from the dining area. Tara's laughter rang in your ears, a sound you had so desperately missed.

You thought you felt her stare on you earlier, but you were too terrified to face it, your conversation with Anika still fresh in your memory. You leant your head against your knees and slowly closed your eyes, the general sound of genuine joy filling your ears as your breathing slowed and your body relaxed for the first time in ages.

You take a moment, revelling in your newfound tranquillity, to think on the emotional rollercoaster you had been sentenced to ride. Tara's love for you had never been questioned, and it wasn't her you didn't trust the night you stormed out. You knew she'd never cheat on you (or so you hoped), but you were unable to avoid what was staring you in the face.

Both at the party and in the comfort of your own home, someone you trusted and some random frat boy had come disturbingly close to finally severing the thread on which you dangled from the end of. You were holding on to Tara with your life, completely and totally unwilling to let go.

You heard the laughter slowly die before a harmony of notifications dinged throughout the apartment. You felt your phone vibrate in your pocket as you and Anika exchanged a confused glance. Hesitantly pulling your phone out of your pocket, you blinked in numbed horror as a photo of Quinn being attacked by Ghostface opened on your screen.

With the previously unheard sound of groans and bangs filling the apartment, you and Anika bolt up from the couch as the others run into the room, eyes focused on Quinn's door. Tara runs towards the door, but you instinctively grab her arm and pull her back towards you.

The feeling of her skin on yours makes your heart skip a rapid beat. You attempted to hide how her touch had affected you as you stepped in front of her, happily offering yourself up to essentially be her meat shield.

Despite your scars burning at the thought, you would much rather be the one to get stabbed if it meant Tara would be ok.

The noises of a struggle ceased as you all stood frozen, your eyes locked on the bedroom door. The silence was deafening. Your dry lips parted in silent terror, unsure whether to breathe or to scream. A single drop of sweat slowly crept its way down your forehead, the suspense reaching an all-time high.

"Run."

You recoiled in horror as the door burst open, Quinn's mangled and bloodied body being thrown out. Anika let out a piercing scream as the body collided with her, taking her to the ground with it. You try to ignore the gruesome sight in front of you as you focus on helping Anika up off the floor.

"Y/n!" Your head whipped around at the sound of Tara's distressed scream. "Wait, Y/n! Come on!" You watched in horror as Chad dragged her out the front door, leaving the rest of you to try and fight off the killer that was standing in front of you.

"Shit. Tara!" When you had Anika back on her feet, you instantly tried to follow your girlfriend. If Chad were to have learnt anything from what you had gone through, you would think it would be to not split up. That is the number one rule in legitimately every horror movie.

"Rookie."

You made the fatal mistake of assuming they were foolish enough to allow another person to escape while scrambling towards the door in a rush to avoid the killer's gaze. The others in the room watched in horror as the masked assailant slashed their knife upward, slicing directly through your left eye.

A grotesque scream erupted from your chest as you fell back onto the floor. The left side of your face felt like it erupted in flames, a powerful throbbing, making it impossible for you to think as the world spun around you. With your good eye, you watched as a steady stream of blood poured out of your gaping wound, which spanned from your jaw and through your eyebrow.

The left side of your face was paralysed with pain unlike any you had felt before. You tried to apply pressure to it with your shaky hands, but the moment your cold fingers touched your split flesh, another broken scream escaped your lips as a wave of nausea washed over you.

Mindy and Anika's screams flew straight over your head as you kneeled on the floor, the taste of blood flooding your senses as the pool of blood underneath you grew wider by the second. You didn't notice Sam's arms hauling you up off the floor until her face came into your now-restricted field of vision.

"S-Sam," you sobbed, her eyes widening and her face turning pale as she saw your profusely bleeding wound. She didn't say anything as she carried your broken form into Quinn's blood-splattered room with Mindy and Anika. She let you go the moment you walked into the room, closing and locking the door behind her to keep Ghostface from following you.

The banging on the door shook the entire room as you worked hard to slow your breathing. As you stood up, the adrenaline in your system began to kick in, and the banging at the door ceased as Sam's troubled gaze met yours.

"Y/n! Bathroom door! Hurry!" Sam whispered desperately towards you as she maintained her iron grip on the bedroom door handle. Turning your head too hastily towards the door, your vision blurred from blood loss and genuine blood falling into your eye as you lurched towards it as swiftly as you could.

As you passed through the bathroom, your hands left bloody handprints on the walls, your journey delayed by the disgustingly disfigured body of one of Quinn's many lovers - you could never tell the difference. With tears dripping from one eye and blood from the other, you returned your focus to the open doorway.

As your eyes left the mangled body, the sight of the infamous Ghostface mask made you jump as yet another scream left your lips. Your reflexes were quick as you reached for the door, trying to close it before the killer got in, but in your weakened state, they easily pushed the door back open, knocking you back as you stumbled into Sam.

They took another swing at you, thankfully missing as Sam pulled you away before you lost another eye. The two of you quickly retreated into the bedroom before you successfully slammed the door shut. Mindy joined you in trying to keep the door shut by fiddling with the lock while Ghostface proceeded to kick it down.

The room shook violently as you and Sam pushed a dresser towards the door, hoping it would serve as a better barricade. Finally getting it in front of the door, you and Mindy stood firm as you continued to resist Ghostface's merciless attempts to tear the door down.

You could feel your adrenaline beginning to wear off as the paralysing pain returned to your face. Peering down, you noticed how your blood had stained a large amount of your skin a dark crimson colour. 'That's a lot of blood.'.

Scrunching your face in pain only caused another wave to hit you as you whimpered. "What are we gonna do, f-fuck." You whispered to yourself brokenly, closing your eye as you tried to ignore the fact you were being violently shaken by someone who wanted nothing more than to kill all of you.

With your only good eye shut, you failed to notice as Sam opened the window and pulled a ladder across from her boyfriend's apartment until she yelled, "You guys go first!". Your eye snapped open at her words as you took in what was happening.

You stayed silent as Mindy argued with Sam, eventually leading to Sam crossing the ladder first whilst you continued holding your makeshift barricade. Once Sam had crossed, Mindy looked towards you. "Go, Mindy.", you spoke assertively. She tried to argue with you, but you were having none of it. "Mindy, go! I've got the door. Just get across the fucking ladder!".

Despite your vision being impaired by your own warm blood, you watched with a ghost of a smile as Mindy and Anika exchanged a sweet kiss before Mindy climbed out the window. You suppose that was one positive about everything that was happening. As far as you knew, Tara was safe, and that was all you needed.

The banging at the door grew louder as Mindy cautiously climbed the ladder. Your frail body was being pushed around by the shaky door as you yelled furiously, "Mindy! "Please hurry!" When she finally made it to the other side, you groaned and turned your attention to Anika, who was bleeding out on the end of the bed.

"Anika, go.". Her wet eyes shot up to yours, looking at you as if you were insane. "Go, Anika. Please.". A few extra tears slipped from her eyes at your words, your complacency at being left alone to die hitting her harder than she expected. You gave her one final nod before she started climbing out the window.

Your grip on the door was slipping with each passing second, the constant banging and rattling eventually leading your feet to slip on the pool of blood that had accumulated beneath you - whose blood? Nobody knows. As you plummeted to the floor, the door shattered behind you, your gaze immediately moving to Anika, who was still less than halfway across the ladder.

"Shit. Shit. Shit." you mumbled desperately as you watched Ghostface finally stalk through the doorway with you in his sight. That was at least until he heard Anika's whimpers from outside the window, causing their masked face to follow her cries. Their head tilted menacingly as their path changed, no longer walking towards you but stalking up behind Anika.

You could hear her panicked cries from your place on the floor, and despite your natural relief that you weren't the chosen target, there was no way in hell you were letting them touch Anika.

You scramble to your feet as Ghostface stabs their knife into the window sill, grabbing the back of their robe and pulling them away from the window with every ounce of strength. As you swing your arm at them, missing their head and instead hitting the headboard, they stumble back into the bed with a grunt.

You didn't quite calculate how you would fight them, seeing you were basically blind, but that probably would have been a good idea.

"Dammit," you mutter worriedly as you trip backwards, your bruised knuckles doing no good as Ghostface stands back up and elbows you directly in your fresh, gaping wound. A hoarse scream escapes your throat as you collapse onto the ground in agony.

Your agonising screams could be heard across the ladder, forcing those on the other side to panic even more. When they saw Ghostface reappearing at the window, their shouts and pleading grew louder as they tried to urge Anika to come across.

Waves of pain shot through your entire body as you curled up on the floor, sobbing hysterically as you couldn't move no matter how hard you tried, absolutely paralysed by the pain.

As you tried to lift yourself off the floor, the sound of Anika's screams resonated in your ears, combined with the violent shaking of the ladder. At this stage, you were crying violently, knowing that if you didn't hurry up and get your shit together, Anika would be their next victim.

All because you couldn't handle the pain.

You leapt off the ground in a final fit of rage, lunging at Ghostface to throw them off-balance until they eventually backed away from the ladder.

It wasn't until now that you noticed the lack of Anika's screams.

Your face paled as you briefly looked out the window. Your blurry vision was met with a glaringly empty ladder and a completely distraught Mindy. Your lips began to quiver as your eyes met Mindy's, the tears that fell down her cheeks telling you everything you needed to know.

Your heartbreak quickly turned into pure rage at yourself and Ghostface.

Your breathing grew thin and ragged as you turned back to the tall black figure, your body shaking with rage. You could almost feel their arrogance from where you stood, evidently relishing seeing you distressed.

They ripped their knife from the window sill before tossing it playfully in their hand. You, on the other hand, remained unfazed, solely concerned with the idea that this mother fucker was going to suffer for what he had just done. You rapidly ducked as their knife swung towards your head before smashing your fist into their masked jaw, their shrouded form staggering backwards at the impact.

"You. Fucking. Asshole." You spoke as you continued to throw punches at them, your rage fuelling every last bit of energy you had left. Ghostface appeared to be taken aback by your sudden outburst, at a complete loss as to what to do with their knife remaining useless in their hand as they try to protect themselves from your furious blows.

With one final punch to the face, their body crashed into the wall behind them, as they fell unconscious. With tears falling consistently down your face, you gave the killer one last look as you stood up and backed away towards the window (you never trusted them to actually be unconscious). The others began yelling your name in relief and desperation when they saw you, assuming you were dead after single-handedly defeating the madman.

Their calls broke you out of your rage-filled trance as you sucked in a large breath before looking across the ladder towards them. The pain was beginning to resurface as you felt your knees start to buckle underneath you.

"Y/n! let's go, come on!" Sam called out to you, desperation laced in her voice. You climbed out the window with one last glance at the body before you. As Anika's body came into view, you felt yourself holding back a gag. The sight of her body, combined with your weakened state, almost made you pass out and share a similar fate.

Your gentle whimpers accompanied you as you carefully climbed the shaking ladder, Sam and Mindy's beautiful voices promising you that everything would be OK - you had no option but to trust them. As blood flows from your agonising wound onto the ladder's rungs, you crawl with as much focus as possible.

Closing in on Sam's boyfriend's window, the girls both reach their arms out to you as they grab onto you and pull you into the apartment. The three of you collapse to the ground in a heap, clutching each other tightly as if one of you might slip away if the others let go.

"Tara and Chad are on their way", you heard Sam's boyfriend say as you continued to sob into her shoulder, her hands carefully avoiding your face. You remained in that position as you felt your body begin to go numb as your blood and adrenaline continued seeping from your body.

Feeling your body go weak, Sam pulls your head back gently as she goes to help you lie down. Mindy and Sam gently place you on the floor, lying on your back, your bloodied and distraught face facing the empty ceiling.

"Holy shit, y/n!"

Your girlfriend's distraught voice did not affect you as your single eye started drifting shut slowly. As blackness starts to encroach, you catch a final glimpse of Tara as she appears next to you, her face stricken with worry as her hands hover near your disfigured face.

"Y/n!?"

Tag-list:@nitchxhdc @emeraldevan @looseheartedlady @the-night-owl-blr @badassjaguar @txmxav @oh-thats-cute @blckrwidow @cacciatricediartemide @flaiire1805 @rainbow-love4ever @fall-08 @simp4nat @natashadeservedmore @livingforwaddams @alexkolax @ssinfulprayers @wifeyjennaortega@thenextdawn @zhasmindoesntknow @faunusrubyrose @harleyspunchingbag @yourmamacom@rockwyn @androgynouscloudenemy@padf00ts-l0ver @wol-fica @captainbeat @sophiexoxo-lol @perfectartisanwerewolf

#tara carpenter #tara carpenter x reader #tara carpenter x fem reader #tara carpenter imagine #jenna ortega #jenna ortega x reader #jenna ortega x fem reader #jenna ortega imagine #scream 2022 #scream #scream vi #scream 6 #simp4wom3n

[mellowsaturns]

the act of giving

BUCKY BARNES X FEM!READER

summary: bucky takes note of something you said and days later, he shows up at your front door with a surprise

warnings: fluff

wc: 640

— — —

Bucky was on a mission.

He liked to think it was the most important one yet. It required both balance and strength, combined with the tricky skill of good hand-eye coordination so he doesn’t fail and ruin the whole thing.

The mission?

He was trying to carry a very heavy bouquet of flowers while navigating the streets of New York City. All so he could surprise you.

He secretly ordered the arrangements of red, pinks and purples days ago, after you casually let out how you thought the act of gifting flowers was romantic.

So here Bucky was, trying his best to not trip over his own two feet. Highly trained ex-assassin aside, the thought of you was enough to make him weak in the knees and he couldn’t have that—because these flowers were for you only, not the grimy concrete grounds.

When he finally reached the comforts of your home—the one he spends most of his time at—he knocked.

It didn’t take long for you to open the door. “Oh!” you said in surprise, “I’m sorry, I think you have the wrong address, I didn’t order any flowers.”

Bucky couldn’t help but chuckle from behind them. He peeked his head out slightly. “Surprise, doll.”

You gasped. “What—Bucky! What is this?!”

“It’s for you,” he said, voice bashful.

You flushed. “When did you have the time to even… How did you… Oh my God…” you trailed off.

You let him in and after he sat them down on the table you couldn’t stop the wide grin spreading across your face. It complemented your living room so well. “Am I missing something? Is today a special day?”

“Does it need to be a special day for me to get my girl some flowers?”

“Bucky! These aren’t just some flowers! You got me a whole garden.”

He frowned. “You don’t like them?”

You shook your head. “No! I love them. I love them so much. They’re gorgeous and they smell lovely. I’m flattered,” you assured. “But why?”

“You said the other day you thought gifting flowers was romantic,” he answered.

The other day… Ah. You were scrolling through social media when you came across a picture of tulips. Then you said out-loud that you thought the act of giving someone flowers was romantic. Even though you were resting your head on his lap when you said that, you were talking mindlessly to yourself more than anything—you didn’t even know Bucky was listening to you. Moreover, you didn’t expect your boyfriend to actually show up with a bouquet so big that even he had trouble getting it through your door.

The sudden thought of him picking up such little details made your heart flutter.

Bucky lightened up the moment he saw that expression on your face. You must’ve been surprised he remembered such a small insignificant moment, Bucky concluded.

“You know I’m always paying attention, doll.”

You started tearing up the second the words came out of his mouth.

He cupped your face with his hands. “Hey,” he said, voice soft and gentle. “Why are you crying?”

You sniffled. “Because you’re so damn sweet. I have the best boyfriend in the world.”

He pulled you into his embrace and chuckled.

“I love you so much, you know that?” you mumbled into his chest.

How could he not? You’re always taking care of him and reminding him. Doing these little things for you was the least he could do. He loved seeing you happy and would do anything to see that radiant smile of yours that outshone every star. He would give you the world if he could, but it might require some planning, so for now… it’s outrageously big carnations, roses and orchids.

“I love you more,” he said, before pulling you back and placing a tender kiss onto your lips.

— — —

a/n: yes this was inspired by those pics of seb carrying flowers. i couldn’t help myself.

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes drabble #bucky barnes imagine #sebastian stan x reader #bucky barnes

[gyusimp]

°•300 followers gift! •°

⚠️Warnings: NSFW, MINORS PLEASE DNI!, Smut content, Very explicit content, Dark content, Kidnapping at Kyogoku house, Stockholm syndrome, submissive reader, Female reader, Insults, Inappropiate languaje, Canon Gyutaro. Read at your own risk.

I reached 300 followers! I promised a good smut so here's a gift from me to all of you for being so amazing. I have no words to thank all your support and kind words since the beginning of this adventure on Tumblr, writing for Gyutaro makes me very happy and it also makes me happier to know that I am contributing a little to this fan club of his. Thank you very much so enjoy! 💚

Special thanks for @mrsshabana and her interesting suggestion 👀

It had already been a long time. were they days? Weeks? Months? You don't remember, but since that day your life took a 180 degree turn. You entered the Kyogoku house with the hope that you could have a better life than you've led up to now, even if it meant selling your body as if you meant nothing. They say that money is not everything in life, surely someone who never lacked for anything said it and now here you were, in your training to learn to be a refined and elegant girl capable of attracting clients with something more than just your physical.

It was easy for you to be accepted, you were one of the few most beautiful girls that existed within the Entertainment District, the house would grow enormously with you so if they didn't accept you it would be stupid. Your beauty had saved your life but it had also condemned you in a way, without you knowing it. You didn't even imagine it.

He had seen you. At all hours of the day, although you could not see him he could watch you, from the dark depths of the shadows he watched you. Every step you took, every word you said he could hear you and hell, you were driving him crazy, just looking at you made him want things that had never crossed his mind before in all his long years of life. Would he just keep watching you or would he do something to change his reality?

His selfishness took him too far this time. You were perfect, you were his and he would not allow you to be contaminated by the dirt of any insignificant worm. You were clean and beautiful, he wouldn't let anyone get their hands on you until it was his turn. If someone was going to try you, it would be him, if someone was going to stain you, contaminate you or desecrate you inside this house, it would be him and no one else but him. He wanted that just by seeing you, everyone would know that you were his and no one else's, that you belonged to him, that every corner of your body screamed his name.

Gyutaro Shabana.

That was when his sister let him do as he pleased, it would be easy to invent a rumor about the girl's escape or murder, it didn't matter. Like her, her brother always got what he wanted. He took you all to himself, he owned you in the darkest and most secluded place in the Kyogoku house, the place furthest from all human contact that no one had the slightest idea existed, where he could remind you that you were his when he wanted.

The first few days were difficult, this client took you all to himself and it seemed like he would never let you go. That twisted idea had no place in your head, you cried, you got angry but no matter how big a scandal you made you couldn't escape from his side.

Those days are just memories now, vague memories where you still can't understand how your way of thinking changed by being by his side. As if you felt anger and frustration when you saw him, you went from wanting him in the same way and doing whatever this man could think of. It would be enough for him to snap his fingers to have you on your knees in front of him completely at his will, because you were his.

Summer was just arriving, the nights, despite being windy, were still hot and irritating. You were in the same place you had been since he took you in trying to find a way to deal with the high temperatures in the environment. Small amounts of sweat began to dampen your body under your clothes, your loose hair was a torment and that feeling between your legs was too annoying. It wasn't because you felt aroused, just the heat made your panties feel very wet for some reason and that was starting to irritate you. When suddenly, he appeared.

Your heart skipped a beat at the sight of him, your heartbeat quickened, and thrilling joy blossomed from the depths of your chest.

"Gyutaro-sama!" You squealed with excitement.

He walked towards you and you just greeted him as usual. You sat on your knees with both hands resting on the ground in front of you as he continued to move closer to you. You looked at him happily, waiting for his return greeting. Gyutaro watched you from above, from head to toe. He noticed the big blush that was painted on your face, how little hairs stuck to your forehead and shoulders due to your sweating and then he looked down at your chest. Your kimono was slightly open because you were trying to freshen up a few minutes ago, which left the beginning of your breasts exposed, making Gyutaro start to feel hard.

He cupped your chin in his thin, bony fingers and forced you to look into his eyes.

"It's hot in here, don't you think?" he asked, with a lazy smile.

"O-Of course, it's quite annoying!"

He kept looking at you "It's different for demons but..." he placed his thumb over your lips, touching them with his fingertip noticing that they were a bit dry. "I suppose you'd do anything to get some water, wouldn't you?"

Water. That would be the solution, you were dying and you didn't know why but Gyutaro had given you the answer. You were probably dehydrated so that was what would get rid of this unbearable heat.

"Yes! You're right!" You answered agitated. "You could get me some, right? You are very good to me, Gyutaro-sama. Could you get me some water?" You asked, eager to hear an answer as you rubbed your face in the palm of his hand as if you were a cat happy to see its owner after a day without seeing him.

Gyutaro laughed after hearing your request. "Of course! You know I can give you whatever you want, as long as you do your part...would you do what daddy asks, sweetie?" He asked.

"Y-yes! Of course I do!" You responded excitedly, almost jumping in place to get closer to him and hold his hands. "You know I would do anything for you, I'm yours!"

Gyutaro watched you with a mocking smile, he thought you were desperately pathetic and that turned him on too much. He loved seeing you so desperate and surrendered at his feet, willing to leave you in his hands so that he could do what he wanted with you.

"Then you'll have to take care of this." Gyutaro took a part of your hair to pull it and bring your head closer to his hip in an abrupt way, to bury your face in his crotch making his length crash against your face. "Look what you've done, my little slut…you'll take care of it."

Gyutaro pulled your hair again and forcefully threw you to the ground so that you were lying on your back. He didn't wait another minute to loom over you in an imposing way and watch you eager to do with you what he wanted.

He took the red ribbon around his neck and took it off, took your hands and tied them above your head to hold you steady. Immediately after, Gyutaro grabbed the collar of your kimono with one hand and pulled it down with all his might to open it, ripping your obi and the rest of the garment leaving you completely naked since you weren't wearing any underwear. Gyutaro looked at you carefully and made fun of you when he saw your extremely flushed face, trying to cover you but your hands were tied.

"What a pathetic and poor girl...I will make you feel like never before." He said between laughs.

Gyutaro settled on you and took your knees with both hands to separate them and open your legs wide, finding your cunt naked and already very wet. He licked his lips and without wasting another minute he pounced on you to start tasting you.

Gyutaro squeezed your thighs hard, making you moan shakily the moment his tongue made contact with your slippery folds. Your hips moved in circles to one side and the other to try to get more pleasure than what Gyutaro was already giving you. You could feel his tongue and teeth running all over your wet vagina, he didn't take breaks, he just devoured you completely like there was no tomorrow. After his mouth had been in each and every one of the corners of your core, he separated from you with a snap coming from his mouth after having made one last suck.

You could feel how wet you were between your legs, a part of your juices had trickled down your butt, wetting your thighs and crotch, mixing with Gyutaro's thick saliva. When he separated from you, a transparent thread was the only thing that united him between your pussy and his mouth. His lips were wet, drops dripping from the corners of his mouth to his chin and he wiped them away with the back of his hand. You felt very aroused and the best of all is that all this was just beginning.

You gave Gyutaro a submissive but daring smile, letting him know you needed more from him. Sometimes, he just bothered you, stimulating you for a while, making you believe that he would fuck you, but actually, he ended up getting up and leaving on purpose, leaving you irritated and desperate. The times when this happened, you usually ended up masturbating, but it was nothing like when Gyutaro did it to you.

"Aren't you going to continue? I thought you wanted to" you said, feigning sadness. "I need more of you and you know it..." your legs stayed open on your own and you weren't going to close them. Gyutaro was in front of you so your intention was that your open and wet cunt was under his gaze to seduce him. "Sure? You don't want to continue?" You asked, you started rubbing against the futon you were lying on to tease him, Gyutaro untied your hands and you lowered your fingers into your pussy. "I'm yours, Gyutaro...see?" You took your labia and spread them wide to expose your wet folds and swollen, throbbing clit to begin rubbing it with your fingers slowly and carelessly until your movements became faster and more rushed as you began to feel more pleasure. "Don't you want to do this? Don't you want to touch me and do everything you want to me?...that's what I'm for!" Your voice was desperate and a bit demanding begging for him. "I told you you could do whatever you want to me so here I am, see?" You said, and you spread your legs more showing Gyutaro your vagina. "Th-this cunt is yours Gyutaro-o...aahh...it's all yours and you can do whatever you want, whatever you want but I-I need you inside, I need you inside of me...j-just take me and do what you want, open me as wide as you can and fuck me until you can't anymore...fuck this little pussy and make me feel complete! Do it Gyutaro-sama!"

Gyutaro removed your hand from your vagina before you could cum on your own, grabbed your hair and turned you to place your chest on the futon, exposing your back. He took you by the waist with both hands hard and put them under you to squeeze your tits making you gasp. Gyutaro came closer to you and lowered one of his hands towards your pussy to insert his fingers directly into your wet hole. Every time Gyutaro moved and arched his fingers inside you there were wet sounds that caused you to get more and more wet.

Your eyes were blank and a thread of saliva ran down your mouth to your chin while you couldn't stop moaning desperately.

"I love to make my whore happy!" Gyutaro said, full of pride in himself. "Do you really want me to do everything you said? Well...you asked for it."

Gyutaro took his hand out of your pussy with another loud sound caused by your juices, he took your hip and made you lift it up, leaning on your knees but without letting your tits come off the futon, arching your back. The only view Gyutaro had now was of your ass so in awe of the view he gave you a hard and painful spank that made you moan. Your ass was on top so he didn't have a perfect view of your hole unlike when he just spreads your legs to fuck you. Gyutaro lowered his hand to your pussy again and began to touch you "looking for your hole" while with the other hand he pulled out his hard dick dripping from his pants and when he finally knew where to enter, he rammed you and penetrated you the first time making you scream with a bang painful pleasure. Your hands were clinging to the futon trying to hold you steady but Gyutaro was too strong and moved too fast. "Is that okay? Is that how you wanted me to fuck you?" he asked sarcastically. Gyutaro cupped your pussy with both thumbs and spread it open to expose your swollen folds. "That's how you wanted me to fuck and open you, right bitch? To fill you up and make you dirty with me, to stain you and make you impure! Are you enjoying it now? Is your pathetic cunt better now or will it still be dripping and writhing for me until i destroy it?!" He spoke mockingly.

You were dying in every way, this hurt as fuck but the pleasure that Gyutaro gave you was completely indescribable, his thick cock was demolishing you but that was what you wanted and you didn't care that your legs and your entire cunt hurt tomorrow and during some days. This is why you were by his side, right? Gyutaro took you by the hips as he dug into you, squeezing your ass and showering you with insults and dirty words, he pulled your hair up to see your expression and your eyes rolling up non-stop moaning until he kissed you abruptly without stopping moving. Gyutaro kept going until he realized how tight your pussy was, your body began to shake and your hair was a mess mixing on your face with your tears, sweat and saliva. Your entire cunt trembled and after feeling that perfect sensation of burning and pleasure at the tip of your clit, you cum. You cum all over Gyutaro's dick just like he did inside you, his release so great that it began to overflow through your folds until it seeped out of your vagina and trickled down your crotch, thighs and knees until it dripped onto the futon and created a small thick puddle under both of them. This orgasm was a relief for you, after having come all you could do was fall on the futon without caring how you got daub in your semen and Gyutaro's. Your eyelids were starting to feel too heavy until you started to close your eyes.

You couldn't even get the water that Gyutaro had promised you because after that amazing fuck, you fell asleep or passed out even with Gyutaro deep inside you. Maybe you had reached your limit but... are you sure that Gyutaro too?

#gyutaro x reader #gyutaro #gyutaro smut #gyutaro shabana #fem reader #smut #minors do not interact #minors dont read #not safe for minors #kny smut #demon slayer smut #kimetsu no yaiba smut

[are-you-still-writing-that]

Yandere Alphabet: Chrollo Lucilfer

That man was one of the first villains I ever truly found interesting, just because he himself doesn´t know who he is. That was such a funny thing to me. Like, considering everything he has done, and he doesn´t know the reason for it? I´m so glad, that the Phantom Troupe will be returning in the latest Manga Arc, though I know they won´t make it out of there alive. I always enjoyed seeing them, after they were first introduced to us. So, I simply had to do something for their boss.

Chrollo Lucilfer

He is the head of the spider, the leader of the Phantom Troupe. A man who is a phantom himself. A man who laid his entire self into a group of people. Who holds onto anything that live has for him with a tight grip. Who is so afraid to let go, because then he knows, those things would be lost forever to him. He is taunting, and when he has the chance to be smug he will be as well. He has problems to see you like a person, but oh dear he still loves his treasures so very much.

Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

There are two very clear ways in which Chrollo will show his affection to you. One of them is loud and acted and the other one is far more quiet and honest. He will shower you in some of the jewellery he stole or anything else that either caught your eye or his. He plays it up for an imaginary audience. The other, more true to him, way to show affection is far more quiet. Sometimes he will read out a poem that reminded him of you, otherwise he will simply seek out your company. Otherwise he makes it clear, that he listens to you every once in a while.

Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?

He doesn´t mind killing, because over the years he simply got used to it. It´s nothing special for him, just another thing, that needs to be done. Though he still tends to be quick about it. There is no need for him to spend more time on something insignificant as that as needed. It´s hard to piss him off enough to make it messy and even then he is more likely to just be clean while murdering someone brutally. In the end, he is more likely to play mind games.

Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

In the first few moments, maybe even days, he would ignore you. He doesn´t do this out of malice, but out of a misguided sense of care and, well let´s call it empathy. He knows, that this is a lot for you, and so he thinks the lack of interaction will help you settle better. Though, there isn´t really any kidnapping happening because he will move into your own space and keep you there with him. He gets a bit petty, when you insult him and tends to give back as good as he gets.

Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

He is a charmer, a born manipulator. Chrollo gives you the illusion of choice over and over again without you even noticing, that it isn´t really choice you can make. He manipulates the situation your in very carefully, as he doesn´t want you to notice this either. He tailors every situation, so that it will fit to his desires, so that his will will prevail.

Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

He doesn´t make himself vulnerable with you. He doesn´t want to be like that with you either. He barely knows himself, so how could he even show you the parts he doesn´t show anyone else either. He doesn´t know. He bases his personality on the people around him. He becomes whatever is needed for the people he holds close to his heart. So, if he had to be honest, he is quite happy never baring his heart and soul to you either. Maybe he doesn´t even have one.

Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?

He very quickly grows annoyed with you but still tries to hold back and treat this like a fun game. Though, he will lose his patience with you at some point and show you what he is capable of. He regrets it almost immediately and apologizes to you. Without a moment´s notice the mask of the charming and kind man is firmly back in place.

Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?

Though he sometimes thinks that your attempts are kind of funny, he still would like it better if you would stop doing it. He looks at you in those moments, as one would, watching a beloved pet do something stupid over and over again. He knows that there is no real chance that you will be getting away from him. So he thinks of it as being hilarious, but would prefer you settle down with him.

Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

He can change his personality at the drop of a head. Chrollo is very good at acting. The moment you realize that, a shiver will run down your spine and a chill will settle in your bones, that will never leave again. He makes it clear, that the way he appears to you is decided on a whim of his. There is also the lurking disregard of human life, his or others, that also carries over into his every action, that tends to freak you out.

Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

He can´t imagine any kind of future with you. He carries the beat of death in his heart. And he is satisfied with whatever he already got with you. He reached out to you with open hands, and he managed to catch you as well. At the moment he is content.

Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?

He is confident in himself, when it comes to you interacting with other people. He knows, that he is able to twist himself into a personality that is everything you could ever want from him. And he also knows, that he is the only one that can do this to such an extent. So he doesn´t really get jealous, though he still wants to be the centre of your attention, and will do what he can to keep that position.

Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling?

Chrollo will be as gentle as he can with you. He likes to adore you. Most of the time he tries to act overly sophisticated, while he generally isn´t. Reading you poetry, comparing you to some of his favourite figures in literature, and quoting you some of his favourite lines as well. He acts almost sweet with you

Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

He is a picture perfect gentleman around you. Polite, careful and attentive. He intrudes into your spaces without really crossing any lines at the same time. The meetings seem coincidental. At least at first. They occur to often to be chance. But because he depicts himself as non-threatening you will let it slide. This is how he gets close. Involving you in several conversations just so, that he can learn more about you.

Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

Considering, that he has a habit of basing his entire personality on other people, there is always a mask in place, that he can never get rid off. He feels empty inside. He is the amalgamation of what all the people he ever loved needed from him. And so he becomes what you need from him as well. But over time more and more of his other personality traits will slip in as well.

Naughty: How would they punish their darling?

He goes all quiet when he is angry. It´s a slow anger, that he keeps a tight leash on. It´s something, that is vicious and barely noticeable at the same time. It hardens his face and wipes every emotion out of his face. It makes him cold and cruel. It makes him creative.

Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?

When he moves in with you, no matter what you have to say about it, he also takes control over your life. Well not completely. Only when he is around. He still travels a lot, as he did before. Always on the move. It´s rare, that he demands that you will come with him. He likes it better when you are safe at home, where nothing can really happen to you. When he returns to you though, he craves to be the centre of your attention. He wants you around, and to interact with him. You won´t have single moment truly to yourself, when he is near by.

Patience: How patient are they with their darling?

Chrollo likes to display himself as a patient man. He isn´t really, but because he holds on tightly to this image it makes him quite patient anyway. No one needs to know, that he is clenching his jaw and his body tensing with annoyance. With you, he tries even harder to patient and charming and most of the time he is even quite successful.

Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

He will mourn the loss of you. It feels to him, as if he lost another piece of himself with you. He has laid loving you, adoring you, as an important foundation of his personality. You were something, someone, that he based his personality around again. You were as important to him, as his spider is. And now he lost you. His grief overwhelms him and he doesn´t know what to do. So he throws himself back into being the head of the spider.

Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?

He can never regret reaching his hands out for something, that he wants. He knows, that he needs to take what he wants, because the world will never offer it to him for free. There is nothing there that he should regret. He sometimes feels almost melancholic though, when he realizes that you aren´t as carefree as before, that he made you change. That he is the cause behind this change.

Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?

He grew up with nothing. Life taught him over and over again that if he wants to have something that he will need to take it. It taught him that if he wants to keep something he will have to fight for it. Over and over again these lessons were drilled into his skull. Over the years he would find peace in his eventual death, because he laid his life into the hands of his spider. It´s strange for him to feel so strongly again.

Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?

It disappoints him to see how you loose your composure that quickly. In the end though he will be far more interested to observe this new facet of you. It makes you appear more human that something like this seems to pull out such a strong reaction from you. Though if he notices that you start to pull back is when he will pull you out of your fit again. No need to loose that shiny personality of your now.

Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?

He will invade your space, instead of forcing you to stay in his. There won´t be a chance of him kidnapping you in a traditional sense. Also, he will be well-liked by most of your peers, because he can play of normal and charming young gentleman very well. Another thing that differentiates him is that he will never be able to open up to you. No matter if you try or not.

Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?

He has an unfortunate habit to shift his personality to fit better into any situation. He always tries to be the most charming version of him that he can. In the end Chrollo lacks an identity that he can rely on. There is no sense of self that can help him to steady himself. This doesn´t mean that he necessarily easy to shake up, but it´s something that can be achieved. Something that can be exploited to manipulate the situation to your favour.

Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?

Chrollo wouldn´t hurt you directly. He has enough self-control to avoid that. But what he will do is threaten everyone you love with a pleasant smile on his lips. He doesn´t care about other people. He doesn´t have the energy for it either. His priority is you. Not whoever you hold dear. He also won´t mind to render them apart if it ensures that you will stay at his side. Or at least won´t act out in an obvious manner.

Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?

He is someone that sees you as an immeasurable treasure. He wants you as soon as he sets his eyes on you, and is not willing to change his mind over you either. While he doesn´t outright worship you, he still puts you on a pedestal. After all you make him feel alive. A feeling that he very deeply treasures and will chase after. He tries to be charming at first, and will try to win you over like that.

Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?

He doesn´t really pine in the first place. He sees you, recognizes that he wants you, then he takes you. There is no period of time, where he just can´t stop thinking about you. His desire overtakes him quickly and completely. Like it always does. And he has learned early: To get what he wants, he has to take you. Nothing comes for free after all, and while patience is a virtue, there is nothing, that can hold him back.

Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?

He would threaten to do this to them. Though he would never actually do it. He makes you aware, that this could be a possibility, without the intention to do it. He likes you. He thinks, that they are interesting. So, why would he break that? Sure, there is some beauty in all the broken things of this world. Doesn´t mean you have to break too. But there is no sense in letting them know that. He likes the fear in your eyes, when he tangles the empty promise over their head.

#yandere #yandere chrollo #yandere kuroro #yandere alphabet #xreader #hunterxhunter #hxh #chrollo lucilfer #kuroro lucilfer #kuroro rushirufuru #Quwrof Wrlccywrlir #yandere headcanon #chrollo headcanons #kuroro headcanons #chrollo x reader #kuroro x reader #yandere hunterxhunter #yandere hxh

[afatedstay]

Sometimes, we just need a little push PAC

Sometimes, we just need a little push. A little nudge to remind you that you are the creator of your own life. In this PAC reading, we'll be uncovering what it is that you need to be reminded of in this season of your life. We have three piles to choose from. You can either choose whichever image, card pile, or crystal calls out to you. Here are the card decks that I'm using today: Magical Spirit Oracle, Tea Leaf Fortune Cards, Tarot of the Divine, and Angels for the Modern Mystic. Happy reading!

Pile 1, Pile 2, Pile 3

🫧 Pile 1 - Citrine

hi pile number one! your leading message today is to protect your energy. learn to set boundaries. perhaps there are people around you that drain you - it's best to limit their access to you. after all, your energy fuels your creativity, life, dreams, and happiness. don't waste your energy on undeserving people or insignificant things. are you having difficulties at work or school? I'm seeing that you're feeling burnt out and tied down to a profession or craft that no longer serves you. unfortunately, no one can save you from this feeling but yourself. you know within your heart what to do, but you're being held back by fear. fear of rejection or abandonment or even failure should not stop you from getting what you want. i'm hearing you're getting in your own way. trust your intuition and follow through. trust that you'll be able to have the discipline to successfully carry out what your heart desires - whether that's traveling, moving out, telling the truth about something you've been hiding for a long time, switching careers or majors, or ending a friendship/ relationship that you know is no longer working! this ten of swords, pile one, shows me that either you or someone close to you is betraying you. if it is a friend, family member, coworker, or acquaintance, you need to sever ties with them. if they are not lifting you up and pouring into you, then they are taking from you. they are stealing your energy, draining you of ideas and dimming your light. and if this is you that's betraying and backstabbing yourself, well, you need to separate from that part of you and sever those ties to the idea that you aren't good enough to follow your heart, not ready yet, not experienced enough, not the right person for what you desire. you are exactly who you're meant to be and you're meant to have everything you desire.

temperance brings back that balanced energy. you're trying to choose between heart and mind, when you need to make a balanced decision between both heart and mind. do some shadow work. journal. find out what it is that is at war within yourself. use both your emotions and your logic.

the angel of discipline is here to tell you to put in the effort. you have the feeling and the desire, but you don't have what you want just yet because you haven't put in all the effort you know you need to yet. what are you waiting for? there will never be a perfect time. you will never be 100% ready. put yourself out there! if you feel like you're lacking in self-discipline, ask the angel of discipline to help give you that motivation and focused energy you need to succeed at your plans. remember: small steps are still steps in the right direction! :)

important themes: good luck, hope, discipline, feel your feelings, blue, green, 3, 47, 17, f, m, e, l, balance, mushrooms, backstabbing, tuesday, travel, family, birds/ doves, mushrooms, festivals, celebration.

affirmation: i am spiritually and energetically protecting myself.

🧸 Pile 2 - Smoky Quartz

hi pile number two! this pile is so into themselves - it's giving inner work and healing! your pile feels so light. the big takeaway for you today is that you are like a phoenix rising from the ashes. the wheel of fortune tells us that what goes up must come down, such is life, and the awakened dead card shows me that no matter how many times it feels like life has kicked you down, you're resilient. you get back up and you do it better. even just getting out of bed in the morning is a display of strength. i'm hearing give pile number two their flowers - they deserve it. and you do! you deserve to celebrate yourself - pat yourself on the back, life is not easy, but you're living it every day.

i'm also seeing tension with family. this could either be immediate family, distant relatives, or found family - those people you chose to be in your life that feels like family to you in every way but blood. i'm seeing a choice you feel like you have to make between what's best for you vs. what's best for your family. what i can say is this - when you're healing like you are, the most important mindset to have is to be selfish in your recovery. this doesn't mean be mean to those who support you, it means choose yourself above everyone and everything else. after all, this is your life, no one else's, and you will never be able to make everyone happy.

i'm seeing that you're going to find that perfect balance between the two things in your life you care most about - whether that's work/ school and family or your desires for your life vs. their plan for you. you will learn what needs to take precedence and then you will prioritize. and you will reach this safe and comfortable balance that you are happy with.

this pile feels so warm and comforting - like the universe is cradling you while you're figuring everything out. just know, the universe has your back and wants to co-create with you, you just have to put in the work too. call on the angel of peace if conflict with others is causing tension and anxiety. let this angel help you find a harmonious resolution. remember: you've got this, and no matter what, you are not alone.

important themes: captain marvel, ocean, lake, river, foggy morning, boomerang, green thumb, spiders/ spiderweb, balance, turtle, resilience, feeling lost/ astray, destiny, peace, communication via phone call, rays of sun, j, o, m, 53, 11, progressive progress, red thread of fate.

affirmation: i honor all of me. my past, present, and future selves.

💡 Pile 3 - Amethyst

pile number three! your energy in this pile is giving very much bad b*tch! some of you must've forgotten who you were, but that's okay. it's time you remember you are that b*tch. it feels like some of you have lost yourself and you may feel like you haven't been in alignment with yourself for a while. and that's okay! life is about following different paths and experimenting. it's okay to get distracted and wander for a while.

maybe you forgot your purpose in life or got "lost" in a different path, desire, person, or mission. but this is how we learn. by experiencing and getting to know all the things we are not, we discover and evolve into who we are meant to be. i'm seeing that through this period of your life that you feel stuck or lost in, there is a man appearing that will be watching over you and making sure you're taken care of. this can be romantic for some of you, or perhaps parental for others. i'm seeing a man who may have passed looking down on you as part of your spirit team for some of you. it could be a father figure or older brother. someone who was (or is) a leader in your life - as seen by the emperor card.

the queen of coins could be your higher self, there to support and guide you gently in the right direction. she represents being grounded and teaches you how to navigate this world and help yourself. wow, pile number three. above all, you are not alone in this lifetime. you have people surrounding you in the physical and spiritual realms that are there to remind you of who you are at your core. you are bright and limitless.

there are no limits to how much you can create and manifest for yourself in this lifetime. if you feel you're stuck in a rut or there's a block in your energy (i'm hearing artist or writers block) - reach out to the angel of possibility to fill you with inspiration.

important themes: leaps and bounds, greatness, achievement, growth, shedding light on secrets, balance, finding love, feeling at home within yourself again, following your heart and your intuition, grounded, anchored, darling, calliope, muses, hercules, writing, journaling, love, love, love, self love, self trust, glowing, 13, 27, 24, l, i, f, k, s.

affirmation: i am remembering a lesson of my soul. i am returning home.

i hope you enjoyed this reading; if you did, leave a like! 🥹 my dms are always open to anyone who'd like to talk, and my suggestion box is open to anyone who'd like to leave a suggestion for my next reading! (and tips are open too for anyone who feels like it haha) have a lovely and wonderful day/ night whenever you're seeing this~ 🥰 - Tiff ♡

#pac reading #pac #pick a pile #tarot #oracle #pick an image #spotify #explore #Spotify

[mlove44lh]

Don't hurt yourself

Chapter 8 - Redemption

Masterlist

Previously chapter

Warnings: angst, swearing, mention of loss

Words: 9,247

there are probably some mistakes in the translation. I'm a bit rusty. Soryy

“I had my ups and downs, but I always find the inner strength to pull myself up. I was served lemons, but I made lemonade. My grandma said "Nothing real can be threatened." True love brought salvation back into me. With every tear came redemption and my torturers became my remedy. So we're gonna heal. Me and you.”

Day 0

“I've dreamt about this for so long that I cannot even recall when this idea first took root within me.

I've memorized and held in my mind every tiny detail of this day. I've spent hours envisioning how it would unfold, researching without even having someone in mind to share this dream with.

And yet, even with all the planning and rehearsing every step in my mind for this perfect day, I never anticipated it would be as perfect as this.

The sky is clear and without clouds. And even though the wind is present, it's almost imperceptible on my skin, even with my arms uncovered.

Just for this weather in the middle of November, I could already consider this day a miracle, as evidence of a love that will be eternal and is already perfect.

The veil gently sways around me. I catch a glimpse of my guests through the sheer fabric that surrounds me. I know I have all my family and friends present, and I'm overjoyed that everyone is finally gathered. But I couldn't look at anyone else now except my future husband, who awaits me at the altar with a smile that assures me everything will be okay in our new life together.

And I believe him with a confidence I didn't know existed within me.

His dark eyes shine like never before, a privilege I've never witnessed. I know I grip my father's arm with a certain strength, but I need to feel the tension in my fingertips at least to prove to myself that I am still alive, and this is not a dream.

What reassures me is knowing that, even though I am a dreamer, I could never fantasize about such perfection.

It's as if my entire life has led up to this moment.”

Day 2,520

I waited for something. Something big, like in the movies. Something that would make me change, that would make everything fall into place perfectly so we could leave it all behind.

Even after all that, I waited. After the disrespect, after hearing from the mouth of the most despicable person I've ever known all the horrible things he was capable of doing, after being called scandalous for a behavior I know was unforgivable. Even after all of that, I waited for something.

But that something never came.

Real life is cruel, and these kinds of things don't happen. Sometimes what seems real is indeed real; sometimes the one pulling the trigger is the same person who vowed to protect you. And this kind of betrayal is the worst of all.

I was forced to stop believing in my personal fairy tale when the prince charming drove a knife into my chest.

I was yanked out of my perfect life, and the jolt was so strong that I don't know how I survived.

I look at my ring finger and even though the wedding ring is no longer here, the mark will probably last for a long time, as a visual reminder of all this.

The room is cold, and I feel his gaze on me, which makes the feeling of suffocation even bigger. My gaze remains low; this is the last place I want to be.

The door opens and the silence is cut by the mediator who introduces himself and then sits down between the four of us.

My heart races as I realize what is about to happen.

"We can begin the hearing."

Day 365

"I didn't think it could get any better after we got married, but I've never been so happy to be wrong.

The year has flown by, and all our time together has been precious. Even though Lewis isn't always present, when we're together, it feels like all the challenges of jet-lags and sleepless nights become insignificant.

One of his hands blocks my vision while the other guides me gently by the waist. I feel Lewis laughing behind me, while I become more restless than ever.

The hustle and bustle of London is miles behind us. Lewis drove, which is unusual since I'm usually the one behind the wheel.

I have no idea what I'll find here, so I eagerly await the revelation I've been waiting for hours.

"You know I hate surprises."

"I know. But you're going to like this one." He stops walking but keeps his hand over my eyes.

"It's our first wedding anniversary. It had to be something big."

"Something big?! Lewis, I got you a watch."

"And I loved my new Rolex. And this gift isn't exactly just for you; it's for both of us.”

Lewis removes his hand from my eyes; it takes me a few seconds to adjust to the brightness. The sunlight illuminates a large field surrounded by greenery. The weather is chilly, but the sunlight makes everything seem warm and cozy.

In the midst of two tall trees stands a house with a white-painted facade. Windows adorn the front of the house, along with some flowers planted around the residence.

It's a beautiful, delicate home, large enough for a family to live in, yet not so grand as to be intimidating. It's the perfect refuge for a lifetime, surrounded by the people you love.

I spend a few seconds observing the facade. Lewis steps away from my side and comes in front of me. His smile is huge, and I can tell by his expression that he's waiting for me to say something. But I wouldn't know what to say when I don't even know what I'm looking at now.

"What do you think?" His expectation implicit in his words.

"Lewis...” It can't be this, he can't have just bought a new house for us. “What is this?"

"Wait. I want you to see inside."

His hand fits into mine, and Lewis practically drags me inside. My excitement is so overwhelming that I can hardly think straight now. This is so much more than I expected.

The living room is spacious, and the wooden beams make everything cozier. The furniture is already arranged, and it's as if they've taken every detail from one of my dreams.

"There's a pool outside." He opens the large glass door, revealing more outdoor space. “We can put a big table here for when we have guests.”

His words come out quickly, like an excited child with something new, his eyes shining like two stars as Lewis divides his gaze from me to the entire house. He doesn't take long to return with his hand in mine, leading me to the second floor of the residence.

The master bedroom adopts a lighter tone than the rest of the house, covered in wood. The white paint on the walls makes the room even more spacious. Everything looks clean and new.

"You really did this?" My voice comes out almost in a whisper, and I then feel the urge to cry that hits me. “Lewis, it's perfect.”

"It's ours," he says. His voice is lower compared to minutes ago; the excitement seems to have eased. "I planned over the last year."

"This is... I'm speechless. It's perfect. But how would we do this? I mean, with our work and everything else."

It would be madness to move to the countryside from London at a time like this, even though it feels like a dream.

"I may have anticipated things a little. But we can come in a few years. This could be the house where we'll grow old together and raise our kids. It's the perfect place. We just have to wait a bit, and in the meantime, we can come whenever we want some time alone. 45 minutes from London and no neighbors for a few blocks sounds good, right?"

I can only smile. The idea of having a family by your side and growing old together is still something that can truly move me.

"Yes. It sounds perfect."

He smiles.

"Come on, I want to show you one last thing."

I can barely take in the details of the room before being pulled again.

Lewis opens the door to the room next to ours; unlike the others, this room has no furniture. A large window is situated in the middle of one of the walls, illuminating every corner of the room. I stand still at the door while Lewis finally calms down behind me.

"There are two more rooms like this, still empty." I feel the excitement within me as soon as I realize where Lewis is going. "We'll set them up together, at the right time. For our children. Let's fill this house with happiness, Y/n."

I turn to him, and I feel some tears escaping from my eyes. I couldn't be happier about this surprise.

I press our lips into a kiss that takes a while to break, just so I can speak before returning to him.

"This is all I want.”

"There are no children in common between the couple, and the divorce seems to be agreed upon by both parts. If there is no impasse with the last proposed agreement, I believe there is no need to extend this hearing."

‘Divorce. Agreement. Both parts.’ It looks as bad as it sounds. How could there be agreement on something as painful and profound as this? That's not what happens, I'm not here because I want to, I'm here because I need to be here, I'm here because I owe it to myself and the part that died inside me. I owe this as justice to the girl who believed so much in fairy tales. So no, there is no agreement whatsoever with this situation.

I glance at my lawyer and gesture to speak with him, but it doesn't become necessary. His throat clearing draws the attention of the few people in the room.

The proposed divorce agreement in the document I left with Lewis that morning was denied, as were the other two made by my lawyer. It seems there was some kind of impasse between what Lewis desired and what his representatives sought.

So, I waited for the counterproposal, and when it came, I tried to come to terms with it. There was much more for me than I asked for in the previous agreements, and much less than what I could receive if I had the slightest interest in a legal battle. The perfect agreement between a remorseful man who thinks money buys karma and the lawyers protecting his empire.

But overall, it wasn't that bad, except for one detail.

"There is a disagreement from my client regarding the agreement proposed by Mr. Hamilton."

They look at us with curiosity. Lewis raises his gaze full of doubt, which meets mine.

"And what would that be?" The mediator settles into his chair, leaning towards us.

I could vomit if I had ingested anything. I wish I could just accept anything proposed and leave right away. But I don't want to leave with anything other than what already belongs to me, and I certainly have no interest in something that would keep me tied to Lewis in any way.

I know this is another thing I shouldn't do. Especially if the hypothesis in my mind proves to be true. But I don't care anymore; I have every right to use the shell of a bad person at least once.

I have the right to escape from him.

"My client is no longer interested in the shares related to Mr. Hamilton's companies. As well as the residence in London. We would like to present a counterproposal, where the shares would be transferred back, and the house would be entirely in his name, if there is agreement, of course."

I watch my lawyer pass new papers to the mediator, who carefully examines each one.

I want to disappear from his life in every way possible; I won't heal if I don't distance myself from him. Continuing with the shares in my name would put me in moments like this. Trapped at a meeting table with him by my side. And the house would only remind me of everything that never was. I don't even want to drive past it, even though it's a new residence; it's infested with ghosts for me.

"What?!" Lewis diverts everyone's attention, even from the mediator, who is still examining the papers in front of him. "What are you talking about? These shares are rightfully yours, Y/n. We earned this together." Hearing his voice in person after so many weeks makes me want to cry.

"Mr. Hamilton, please. Only your lawyer has the right to speak at this moment, okay?" The mediator's voice becomes slightly louder to draw Lewis's attention.

There's a lot of disbelief in his gaze, while mine overflows with sorrow.

If only it were just businesses and numbers, the only things we conquered together, all of this would be infinitely easier.

"Don't do this. The shares are yours too, you know that."

Lewis completely ignores the mediator and continues speaking directly to me. His gaze reveals pleading, as if he's seeking redemption and the only way to achieve it is to ensure I end up with millions in shares.

It's tempting. But we're talking about a woman with a wounded ego and immense pride. So, thanks, but no.

"Mr. Hamilton, please."

The mediator seems a bit nervous. Meanwhile, his lawyer becomes restless and leans in to speak with Lewis.

"If she's giving up willingly, you should consider it. We're not talking about something small, Lewis." His lawyer's voice is low, but within this tiny room and with everyone else silent, it would be impossible not to hear his words.

Lewis still looks at me, and I still look at him. I haven't opened my mouth to respond to him, and I don't intend to. All I want is to leave this place soon with what I want, or rather, what I don't want.

"I don't care about that." Lewis responds to his lawyer, but still looking at me. I could even say there's a hint of anger in his expression, if only I still knew this person in front of me.

Day 1,397

“Waking up to the smell of coffee at home is one of my favorite things because I know when it happens, he's home. And it couldn't be any different; he promised me he would be.

My arms wrap around him as soon as I find him in the kitchen. His bare torso is warm and makes me feel at home like nothing else ever came close to achieving.

His hands hand me a cup of coffee, and our lips come together in a kiss full of the longing that seems never to go away, no matter how close we are.

"How is it possible for someone who hates coffee to make the best coffee I've ever had in my life?!"

Lewis laughs before placing his hands on my waist.

"You say that because you're in love with me and like everything I do. Literally, everyone who's had my coffee didn't like it."

"That's because they don't know how to appreciate the strongest coffee that has ever entered their system." Laughter echoes through the apartment. "But seriously, honey, as much as I love it, you have to go easy on the amount of grounds. I could stay awake for days if I had more than one cup in the morning."

His hands tighten around my waist enough to make me sigh. I place my mug with the hot liquid on the counter and soon bring my hands back to his bare back.

I see the smile fading from his face, replaced by a serious expression.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing. I was just thinking."

"Want to share that?"

"I'm not sure you'll like the idea very much." A shy smile returns to his lips and my curiosity rises. "I know that wasn't the plan. But I can't stop thinking about it."

His eyes are no longer in contact with mine.

"Come on. Tell me."

"Well." He seems anxious, perhaps genuinely concerned about my reaction. "I think, maybe. If you want. We could start trying to expand the family."

My smile drops.

Not because I don't want this, but because I want it so bad that just the idea of Lewis also wanting it even before what was planned between us makes my stomach churn with happiness. I don't know if it's because of Lewis's strong coffee or my excitement, but suddenly I become aware of my accelerated heartbeat.

"I mean. If you still want to wait, we can. I know you have your work, and..."

"No!" I interrupt his train of thought. "I just wasn't expecting that right now." I have to think about the words before I can say them. "Lewis. Are you serious?"

I pull his face back to mine and force him to look at me. We are so close to each other that Lewis must be able to feel my own heartbeat against his chest.

"I've been thinking about this for a while. I know we agreed to wait until after Formula 1, to move to London and start our family. But I don't think I'm going to retire anytime soon, and I want a family with you now. And I know it will be crazy to have a child in the middle of all the travels and chaos of our life, but..." His smile grows even wider. "It will be our child, right?! If there's someone who could handle all of this, it's him. Or her."

My excitement is so overwhelming that I can hardly think of anything to say.

I know my eyes overflow with happiness and emotion, and I see Lewis's eyes mirroring the same.

I pull him closer to me, pressing against him with no desire to let him go anywhere.

"You know how much I want this." I pull him into a kiss that ends up being a bit messy due to our excitement.

"Is that a yes?" Lewis separates us for a moment to speak.

"Of course!"

"We'll take a break so that Mr. Hamilton's lawyer can review the counterproposal and to calm things down a bit.”

I watch both of them stand up. Lewis leaves the room almost running, while his lawyer follows him with the new papers in hand. I feel numb, I need to tap my feet on the floor a few times to make sure I won't fall when I stand up.

“Y/n. Are you sure about the counterproposal?” Adam, my lawyer, turns his chair towards me. His voice is low even though there's no need for it. Since there's no one else in the room. “I know you have your reasons, but we're talking about over fifty million. That could become much more over the years. Giving it away like this to him could be a mistake. You could at least sell them.”

"No. I don't want anything more from him, Adam." His expression reveals what he doesn't say, which makes me feel the need to justify myself. "I'm not saying this just because I'm hurt, I'm saying this because I really want out of this, I don't want to deal with anything related to Lewis anymore. And I know it may sound crazy, but every penny coming from those shares would only make me feel even worse. So yes, I am positive about my decision."

"Alright. I understand." His compassionate look kills me. I turn away from his expression to avoid dealing with that pity stamped on his face. "I think they'll agree, there wouldn't be a reason to delay this any further."

"I hope so." I don't wait for a response, leaving Adam in his place and stepping out of the room in search of fresh air.

Day 1,716

"I promised I wouldn't disappoint myself this time. I thought it would be easier not to see what I wanted for the seventh consecutive time. But no. Every month, it just hurts more.

I stare at the small plastic object in my hand as I feel a lump in my throat.

A damn red line.

One. Just one.

I feel Lewis's arm around me and his face resting on my shoulder.

We started trying a few months ago. We knew that if we waited for the perfect moment, it would never come. We travel all the time, and Formula 1 takes up a good part of Lewis's life. Besides, it's a dangerous sport.

But the desire for our children proved to be so big that any potential problem seems microscopic in comparison. We have a serious relationship and stability, as well as plenty of willingness and love, what could be missing?!

So, I stopped taking the pills and waited for it to happen. But it didn't. Not in the first month, not in the second, it started to bother me in the third. But I didn't imagine it would reach the seventh unsuccessful attempt.

I try to contain myself and pretend to myself that everything is fine. We're young, we have plenty of time to make this happen. But the frustration is written all over my face.

"We can keep trying,” his voice comes out muffled because his face is resting on me. “It's the best part anyway,” he jokes.

A soft laugh escapes my lips.

“Yeah. Maybe next time, huh?”

I take the test out of my field of vision and look at Lewis. He adjusts his posture and nods while looking at me attentively.

Maybe he's waiting for some kind of outpouring, or even restrained tears. But there isn't any. Not because I'm not feeling sad, but because it wouldn't make sense right now. Especially when he's just minutes away from leaving home for another one of his countless work weekends. A tearful wife wouldn't be the best thing to leave on his mind before all the concentration needed for a Grand Prix.

“We could consult with a specialist if you want.”

He stands up and goes to his suitcase.

“No. I don't think it's necessary now.” My face betrays my words. The question of why a pregnancy hasn't happened yet has been weighing on my mind for months. “We can wait for some more time.”

He sighs.

“Alright.” His hands rest on the handle of his suitcase. “I have to go. Will you be okay?”

“If I say no, will you stay here with me?” Compassion fills his eyes, making me immediately regret what I just said. I truly wish he would give up work sometimes, but I would never ask him for that. Not wanting to be inconvenient, and already knowing the answer. “I'm kidding. Go, go save the world, number forty-four.”

“You're my world.” Lewis walks over to me and plants a kiss on my forehead. That makes me smile. “See you on Monday.”

I go down the dozens of stairs arranged in front of the court. I sit down on one of the steps before reaching the end of them.

The streets are bustling. It couldn't be different on a Tuesday morning. I try to focus on the lives of people swiftly passing by, hoping to distract myself from the lump in my throat.

There are so many things on my mind that I can't even concentrate on one of them. It's like a buzzing is taking over me, leaving no room for anything else. Neither my expectations for a new life, nor the object kept in my bag, nor the hypothesis that should be consuming me, nor my marriage dissipating while I watch it all, nor my exhaustion. None of this is enough to make me feel anything.

I notice his presence beside me through my peripheral vision. He sits down, leaving almost no space between us but without touching me. I don't move to look at him or to move away from his figure. I remain focused on the people walking in front of us, wishing at this moment to have the life of the lady strolling peacefully with her dog through the streets of Monaco.

"How did we get to this?"

Of all the things I expected to hear from Lewis after weeks of not talking, this would be the last of my assumptions.

I don't think much before responding to him.

“I don't know.” I feel his gaze on me, but I still don't turn to him. “I don't think it happened at a specific moment. If only we could attribute it to one exact thing, it would make things easier.”

I can hear his breath next to me; he seems shaken, restless in his place.

“Y/n, if I could go back and undo what I did...”

“It wouldn't change a thing.” I interrupt his speech. I couldn't bear to hear Lewis's lamentations, especially at a moment like this, where I'm so detached from my own self that I'm not even aware of my emotions. “Our marriage ended before you cheated me. It ended long before that, long before losing our child. It happened, I don't think it's a good idea to keep tormenting ourselves thinking about what could have been. Because it wasn't. Simple as that. We're here today.”

He stares at me; I know he's looking into my eyes, and from the position of his body leaning towards me, I can deduce that he longs for my reciprocity. But I don't want to, and I can't look at him right now. As much as all my instincts honed over these years are begging me to go towards him.

“What if we kept trying?" He doesn't even believe in his own words. The sentence comes out like a final sigh.

“We tried for a long time. But we gave up at some point. We kept giving up on small things until they turned into huge things.”

This is the end. I know that. I've had it in my mind for a long time, and I'm sure of this decision. But it should hurt less. I should at least have the ability to breathe or to face my — still — husband.

I don't feel my words coming. I just feel the need to say them, maybe because I need a conclusion. Or because I got used to sharing everything with him, and that's still something that needs to go away.

“I don't feel happy to be here today. Maybe I should have fought more, and you too. But despite that, I know this is the right decision. And even if you don't admit it, I know you agree with me. There's no point in thinking about what could have been done when, in the end, we're here today. And nothing will change that.”

Finally, I gather the courage to look at him. He looks like a complete stranger, a totally different person than he used to be.

His gaze, which was always the thing I loved most about him, now doesn't have the same effect on me. Everything about Lewis seems off. And even though I'm close to him, I don't feel him here.

The person by my side has become a stranger. I'm overwhelmed by grief for someone who is alive and in front of me but is nowhere near who they used to be.

I stare at him for a few seconds before speaking again.

“That's the only regret I have. This habit of deceiving ourselves, the complacency we let take over our marriage. Because if we had realized earlier, if we hadn't let it get to this point where we both ended up hurt, then I would remember all these years with immense happiness. But that's not what happens. I can't even look at you because it hurts so much.” I watch tears invade his eyes right in front of mine. I feel anger and regret at the same level. “And that's the part that kills me. Knowing that the best years of my life will be the most painful to remember.” Only when I stop to breathe do I realize that I'm also crying. I let the tears flow freely down my face as I continue my train of thought. “I don't know if this feeling will change. If with time, it will get better, all I know is what I'm feeling today and what I'm living today. And I've decided that from now on, this is what I'm going to focus on. The present.”

He doesn't say anything for some time.

We stare at each other without any intention whatsoever. There's nothing to be said that would make any difference.

“I'm sorry.” I barely recognize his voice, just like the rest of his being.

“I know. Me too.”

Day 2,125

“The notification sound on my phone breaks my focus from the TV program. I grab the device resting on the couch cushion and check the notification. As soon as I read the message, my boredom is replaced by another wave of hope, as it has been happening every month for over a year.

The notification arrived, and Lewis is home today, things that almost never happen at the same time. Maybe this is a sign that this month will finally be the one that works.

Everything is seen as a sign for a desperate woman.

I jump off the couch and head towards our bedroom.

Lewis is lying down, his attention fixed on the large TV, airing the same program I was watching in the living room. The realization leaves me confused, and even a little sad. Why would he prefer to stay away from me than do exactly the same thing he's doing here, next to me?!

I swallow my wounded ego and ignore the unpleasant feeling that this understanding left me. After all, what we need to do is much bigger than my tantrum.

I climb onto the bed and approach him. Lewis doesn't bother to move.

I straddle his lap without any difficulty. My kisses start on his lips and are instinctively reciprocated by him, but his hands remain inert. I grind on his lap in an attempt to stir something. Nothing.

I move my kisses towards his abdomen, and it's only at that moment that Lewis takes some action. Not the one I wanted, of course.

“Y/n. Love. Not today, okay?*

His hands come to me, not to enjoy more of my touch, but to stop me from continuing. This irritates me, but it doesn't prevent me from continuing. I return to his neck and distribute kisses on his skin, with no intention of giving up what I need.

“Come on. It'll be quick.”

I lower my hands to the elastic of his sweatpants while still showering him with kisses, but my movements are interrupted by him.

“Y/n, stop! I said no.” His voice is loud, which makes me stop immediately.

He moves away from me abruptly. Lewis gets up without any care for how he leaves me on the bed.

I feel embarrassed like never before, anger comes in the same dimension.

”Lewis, what the fuck?!”

“I'm tired of this shit. What do you think? That I'm a damn robot you can press a button and get whatever you want? That's ridiculous.”

“I thought you wanted this too.”

Lewis's breathing is audible; he's restless as he stares at me.

"And I want to, but not like this. When was the last time we had sex because we were horny, not because we're obligated to fuck every time your phone notifies you about your fertile period, Y/n?"

"I don't know, Lewis. I'm trying to get what both of us want here."

"Yes, you're trying that by becoming the coldest person on earth. What's the next step? Do you want me to come in a jar and hand it over to you?"

"That's actually a good idea. It would make things a lot easier."

Sarcasm slips out of me effortlessly. I feel anger rising in my body. And anxiety too.

"For God's sake!" He enters the bathroom but leaves the door open. I hear the running water from the tap for a few seconds before he speaks again.

"What the hell do you want, Lewis?!" My voice erupts in a scream.

He comes back quickly to stand in front of me.

“My wife!" He yells too. "That's what I want, Y/n. Can you bring her back?! Or has this obsession taken her away too?"

My frustration is so intense that I feel my throat burning with tears that want to fall. We've never shouted at each other, never fought like we are now. Everything feels like a horrible and senseless chaos.

"I had a terrible weekend. And you didn't even bother to ask how things are. I asked you to come with me to the Grand Prix, and you chose to stay here, probably to consult with another doctor to tell you exactly what all the others have said, if there's any other doctor left in Monaco that you haven't consulted. You're so blinded by this idea that you forgot to keep living your life."

A humorless laugh escapes my lips.

"Oh, poor little thing. You had a terrible weekend? I had a terrible year, Lewis! And I'm not crying because no one came to console me or anything like that. I'm trying to do what I should, what both of us want. You don't have the right to judge me for that." I get out of bed and walk towards the door. Frustrated and overwhelmed by guilt. Today could have been the day, but it wasn't. It wasn't because he didn't want it. "Grow up, Lewis. And if you want someone to pat you on the head, go find someone else, because it won't be me."

It's the last thing I say before slamming the door behind me.”

“I think we should go back inside.”

His voice breaks the silence between us, which has lingered for some time. We stopped talking minutes ago, but we didn't feel the need to move away from each other.

I think we both know that this is the last time we stay together like this. There's no guilt in wanting to prolong this moment, as sad as it may be.

I nod as I look back at him.

I know this was the opportunity to finally tell him what I believe is happening, but I simply can't. It was too hard to get to this point, and sharing my suspicions would only hurt him and further delay the inevitable. I don't need to subject him to that, because if I'm truly right, I know this issue won't be something that lingers for long. And if I can spare him from this additional pain, that's what I'll do.

"I'll sign the papers. If that's really what you want."

"No. That's definitely not what I want, Lewis." I stand up alongside him. "But it's what we have to do if there's still any respect left for what we both lived together."

We enter the grand courtroom together, taking small steps. We walk side by side without any hurry towards the cold room that awaits us, not saying a word. No need for more lamentations. Certain of what will happen, uncertain about the future we hadn't imagined without each other.

I return to my seat, my heart racing as everyone settles in.

"My client agrees to the counterproposal," his lawyer breaks the silence.

"That's good. Now that both parties agree, you may finally sign the documents, please," the mediator seems almost relieved.

The knot in my throat chokes me. I want to escape from here, I want to cry like a baby right now. This hurts like hell. I didn't think I would have a breakdown at this moment, not when everything is so close to ending.

I try to hold myself together, to keep my breathing in check and not show how close I am to bursting into tears and screams. I think I do well in that, as the only person who notices my instability is the only person in the room who is in the same situation as I am.

His red eyes betray a nearly palpable pain.

It shouldn't be like this, it shouldn't be ending this way.

We promised we would die together, old and gray, in our house with the white façade surrounded by flowers in London.

It wasn't supposed to end in a cold room at the first instance court in Monaco. This is so damn unfair.

Lewis takes the white papers that were handed to him by his lawyer. His hands shake, but only I notice. He doesn't avert his gaze from mine, not for a second, not even as he picks up the black pen placed in front of him. He wants to be sure. He wants one last confirmation from me.

Day 0

"Our hands fit perfectly. I instantly feel calmer with his touch. I step away from my father as I approach my fiancé.

“You look perfect.” He whispers in my ear as he gets close. The emotion in his voice is clear. Lewis plants a kiss on my cheek before turning to my father.

They shake hands. My father pulls Lewis into a half-hug, I know something is said in the midst of it by the older man, but I don't hear what. Just the possibilities that pass through my mind are enough to make me laugh.

Lewis doesn't take long to turn back to me; now his attention is entirely mine.

"Ladies and gentlemen, family and friends, we are gathered here on this special day to celebrate the love and union of two souls who have decided to embark on this journey of life together.”

The celebrant begins to speak. My heart races, and the smile on my face feels like it will stay there forever.

Lewis looks more handsome than ever. His happiness manages to make him even more beautiful, as if that were possible. I want to look around, see if the flowers arranged are the ones we chose, or if everyone we invited is present. But I couldn't, I couldn't look anywhere when I have the best thing in my life right in front of me. Moving his mouth and telling me "I love you" without making a sound. Just for me to know, just to make it clear.

“Marriage is a unique moment, as it is the union of two individuals who choose to share their dreams, joys, and challenges side by side. Today, Lewis and Y/n, you are taking an important step in your lives, a step that represents the promise to love and care for each other, regardless of the circumstances. The journey of love is marked by highs and lows, but it is the partnership and complicity that will help you overcome all obstacles together. Love is the force that binds your hearts, making you stronger, braver, and more willing to face any adversity. Now, I ask for everyone's attention for the vows of the newlyweds.”

Anxiety consumes me even more, but I am excited to finally be able to say the words I have been holding inside me.

I turn to Alessia, who stands behind me. She hands me the small piece of paper I entrusted to her earlier.

I try to breathe a few times before starting to pronounce the words written by me on the lined paper.

“I think it's not news to anyone here how much of a dreamer I am. Everyone who knows me has heard about my fantasies at some point.” My laughter is accompanied by that of my guests. “Many of them I judged and was aware of being impossible. After all, I know that nothing can be perfect.” I take my eyes off the paper and lock eyes with Lewis for a few seconds. “I never thought I would be so happy to be wrong.”

I try to hold back the tears as I speak, but I know my emotion is implicit and one step away from taking over me.

“You showed me that my unrealistic dreams are not only possible but even better than in my imagination. Love transcends what I thought was impossible. Your love showed me that even the bad parts are worth it if I have you by my side.” Lewis smiles in a way different from the usual, tears fill his eyes too. Which only makes me even more fulfilled. “I never imagined that I would marry that guy I met by mere chance on a night out with my friends. Not because I didn't like you right away; because I think it's clear how I was already won over by you before even knowing your name.” His laughter echoes within me. “But because I imagined that when I found the love of my life, the feeling would be different. I would be afraid, anxious, uncertain at times. After all, that's what my mind and all love stories make us believe. That it has to be complicated to be real. But that's not what happened, everything between you and me was natural, it felt right from the beginning.”

I need a few seconds to breathe, look at our guests for a brief moment, and can capture all the emotion present in the room.

How is it possible for a moment to be so magical? How could all of this result in anything other than the perfection of a life together? I thought I was sure of something until now, but this feeling shows me otherwise. There is nothing within me greater than the conviction of the right decision for the love of my life.

“I took a while to realize that this is the essence of true love. The kind that happens fluidly and unconditionally, without pressures, fears, or insecurities. In you, I found the security and comfort I didn't even know I was looking for. Now, looking back at everything we've been through, I realize that every step that brought us here was guided by destiny. Every moment we shared, every laugh, every tear, everything was part of a carefully written plot for us to find each other in this perfect fairy tale.”

“And, my love, I promise to keep cherishing this feeling that binds us. Because it was by your side that I learned that true love doesn't need to be complicated or uncertain. I thank chance, destiny, and all the forces and entities that brought us together. I am blessed for this, and there are not enough words to express my gratitude at this moment. May our love continue to grow, to blossom, and may we face every challenge together with courage and complicity. Because if I'm by your side, I know there's nothing to fear, and we'll be fine as long as we're together.”

I articulate the last sentences while looking into your eyes; they are already engraved in me even before writing them.

Lewis presses his lips together; there are a few seconds of silence before we laugh at each other. In a mix of tears and happiness.

Knowing that it's now his turn makes me more anxious than minutes ago when I started my speech.

“Oh God.” He whispers with a choked voice. “How do you expect me to say anything after that?”

“Just breathe. I'm right here.”

Our hands connect again. I tighten my grip on him, waiting for the time Lewis needs to prepare.

Eventually, Lewis brings his hand to the pocket of his pants and takes out a folded piece of paper.

I notice the tremor in his hands. But his smile remains intact.

“Y/n…” He looks at me for a few seconds before returning his gaze to the paper. “I could spend hours here telling you how certain I am that you are the love of my life. How you showed me a life that I never imagined would be mine. Or how you taught me so much that I don't know how I survived before I met you.” The hand holding the paper tightens with a certain force, but his expression, in contrast, brings me peace. “But there are not enough vows of love to tell you what I would like now, Y/n. I don't think there's a combination of words that comes close to expressing what I really want, what I feel inside me. That's why I'm not going to try, not at this moment, not in this way. I will show you, every day, what no phrase at this moment could. And that's my promise to you.”

I feel an euphoria that could be mistaken for anxiety; each word of his envelops me in a way that I even feel numb, as if floating in an almost immortal state while I listen to him. Everything within me echoes that this is the moment, the pinnacle of genuine happiness. It's the moment I intend to remember every day for the rest of my life.

Simply, the best moment of all.

I even make an effort to set aside the awareness of my emotions a little. I'm not sure what could happen if I completely surrender to what I'm feeling. It's like a nirvana, and I hope it lasts forever within me.

Lewis pauses for a few seconds before continuing.

“You are the best part of me. I am my best version when I have you by my side. And for that, I promise to cultivate each of these things that move us, promise to take care of this love and never let it go away. I promise to remember every day how lucky I am to have a wife like you, even in those moments when you drive me crazy wanting something and not being sure what, and thinking I should be a deciphering master.” Everyone laughs, tears mixed with happiness on our faces. “No. It's okay, actually your ability to confuse me is one of the things I love about you.”

“You are light. You are happiness. You are peace and a storm at the same time; you are my foundation, the love of the life of someone who never believed in fairy tales. You are my fortress, and I hope to be yours. So, I'll be here, always right here, by your side. Making sure you are always content, always supported, never alone. Never alone.” He emphasizes the last sentence. His eyes glued to mine. “I love you.”

His gaze, intense and suffocating, seems to penetrate my skin, but I maintain composure, hiding the storm unraveling within me. Any gesture from me could end up prolonging this unbearable moment, and honestly, I don't know if I could endure another hour in this room.

I resist the temptation to look away and, instead, just nod slightly. In the ensuing silence, I try to capture every detail, every line on his face, as if this were the last time I would see him. His eyes, which once shone with love, now reflect only the shadow of what we were. His Adam's apple moves, and his gaze shifts away from mine, finally releasing me from this anguish.

The fingers holding the pen are tense, white from the applied pressure. The fine tip touches the paper, leaving a trail of farewell.

A final uncertain glance.

The last second as wife and husband.

I can't believe it ended like this.

But that's how it ends. Not with a bang, but with a suffocating silence, marking the end of something we swore to be eternal. The last trace of our connection fades away, and now all that remains is the journey unfolding before me. A life now redefined by the absence of what once was us.

[…]

I enter the apartment, and exhaustion takes over my body.

It's still mid-morning, but it feels like days have passed since I woke up.

My new home is nothing like the previous one; it's a simple apartment with three bedrooms that seems to have the perfect size to avoid feeling cramped but also not so large as to leave me lonely.

The apartment of a single woman.

The walls are predominantly white, with a single exception in the living room. I painted one of the walls blue on my first day here, a choice that now seems too impulsive. I look at that wall and feel a twinge of regret, but the idea of repainting it is simply inconceivable.

I don't even like the color blue.

Suddenly, I become aware of the object I tucked into my bag days ago, and for the first time since the purchase, I feel anxious about the possibilities it holds.

I close my hand around the strap of my bag and walk to the bathroom, no hurry, but my heart beats unevenly.

I lock the door behind me, even though I'm alone, a habit I haven't lost even after leaving my parents' house.

My breath would be audible even if the house weren't in the absolute silence it finds itself in.

I do what I've done at least two hundred times in my life; there's no need to look at the instructions. At this point, it has become muscle memory. The ritual unfolds in silence, marked only by the subtle sound of paper and plastic.

With care, I return the test to its place in the small box. Hesitation hangs in the air, a prolonged pause before facing what I already know. The urgency to find out competes with the reluctance to confront. I'm not ready; I don't want to relive all of that again. The fear inside me grows to proportions I've never experienced before. If I had the slightest strength, I could have a breakdown now.

I leave the bathroom, seeking more space, trying to alleviate the suffocating sensation. The small box still in my hand.

The indicated 3 minutes have passed; the instructions say to disregard after 15 minutes. I have 12 minutes, 12 minutes to avoid the answer, 12 minutes where I still pretend not to know anything, where I can continue to delude myself for another brief interval. 12 minutes that allow me to postpone the inevitable confrontation, as if ignoring the clock could freeze the reality that may await me.

There are tears. Tears that I don't know if they're of sadness, joy, or a complex combination of both. Each drop seems to carry the weight of a journey, mourning the past loss, the uncertainty of the future, and the unexpected surprise of the possibility of a new life forming.

There's a trembling smile playing at the corners of my lips. It's a smile marked by vulnerability, fear, and resilience. The irony of discovering this right after the divorce seems to hang in the air, but there's also a flame of courage that ignites within me. A strength that arises from the need to face this chapter alone.

There is confusion. My heart feels like a maze of contradictory sensations. The duality of emotions manifests in thoughts that collide, in doubts intertwining with fearful hopes. How to balance the fragility of a new life with the pain of a previous loss? Or rather, two losses?

There is fear. It feeds on the vulnerability of being alone. The specter of the past loss still looms over me, a shadow that whispers fears. The uncertainty of what is to come.

There is happiness. Happiness that arises from the understanding that life, despite its painful twists, goes on. A new life, an opportunity to start over, even if the scenery seems daunting at first glance. It's the hope that ignites in the face of darkness.

I gather the necessary courage and hold the object firmly. I take it out of the box.

There are two lines.

[…]

Life unfolds, it happens, even though I may want to stop it at times. Choices and changes, at times, leave eternal scars. And if it hurt enough to leave a mark, it means it should always be remembered.

Before me, there is a blank canvas, a path never treaded before, where I carry my baggage and memories that I'm not sure will fade so quickly.

The pain makes room for resilience, a chance for redefinition. Life shows that the ability to move forward is the source of overcoming, even when the future is unstable and uncertain.

Even in the quietest corners of my story, there is a subtle melody that continues to play, reminding me that, despite everything, life persists, transforming into an eternal flow.

Life metamorphoses, flowing like a river that, even in the face of obstacles, finds its way, reminding me that persistence is the essence of existence.

However, this same persistence, although it is the force that makes us move forward, can also be the cause of pain, of giving up, and of exhaustion.

Learn when to say goodbye.

N/a: OMG I´M BACK!😭

I won't even justify my absence. I simply couldn't write for a long time. But I hope it was worth it. Here it is, the last chapter, finally. I hope to be able to write again and bring more stories. Thank you to everyone who followed and had patience. ❤️❤️

#au fanfiction #lewis hamilton #lewis hamilton fluff #lewis hamilton smut #lewis hamilton x reader #daniel ricciardo x reader #daniel ricciardo #f1 #formula 1 #george russell

[loserdiaz]

hi :) 81 for the spotify wrapped drabble prompt?

hiiii :))) 81 was habit by louis tomlinson <333 (this might have gotten away from me oop)

You're the habit that I can't break. You're the feeling I can't put down. You're the shiver that I can't shake.

Buck and Eddie aren’t a thing, not really. They’re friends, best friends, in-sync on a level Eddie has never experienced with anyone else. Buck's his favorite second person after Chris and Eddie— he loves the guy unconditionally. That's the truth.

He doesn't really know how they got here or how has Eddie let it get this far, but they have sex. Occasionally.

There's also the fact that Eddie is pathetically, embarrasingly, stupidly in love with Buck and he would marry the man on the spot if he asked (he hasn't, much to Eddie's secret disappointment). But those are just tiny, insignificant details that he's been too much of a coward to let Buck know of.

Eddie tells himself he'll quit it. He'll call off whatever implicit sexual deal he has with Buck and walk away (figuratively, of course. he wouldn't really walk away from Buck— Eddie doubts he could even if he wanted to. As in, it would be emotionally and physically and spiritually impossible for him to or whatever.)

But he'll walk away from the sex part of their relationship. From this friends with benefits thing they kinda fell into without Eddie really meaning to.

He'll do it! He swears!

The thing is— Well... Buck is really good at sex. In a mind blowing, toe curling, Earth shattering, makes you come undone at the seams, ruins you for anyone else ever kind of good. (Maybe part of it it's that Eddie's in love with him but still, the guy has skills alright) And it makes the walking away plan kind of hard to pull off.

It all comes to a halt at Athena and Bobby's renewal of vows.

It's a small, simple ceremony they do for their seventh anniversary— It's really sweet, teeth rotting and all. Eddie is happy for them, truly.

It also reminds him of everything he wants and can't have.

It makes him so terribly upset that he can't even focus on Buck trying to quickly blow him in the bathroom while everyone is dancing outside. Which Eddie never thought would be possible but apparently it is.

He tries not to let it show but his mind keeps conjuring this picture of Buck wearing a fancy suit standing in front of Eddie with a ring in his hands and a beaming smile on his face. He keeps imagining him reciting wedding vows and then them coming home, a white picket fence, a tiny baby, a dog running in the garden and ruining their neighbor's flowers.

He sees their future, so clearly that it hurts.

"Stop. Buck, stop." He chokes out as he pulls away and quickly zips his pants up.

Buck looks up at him with wide, worried eyes. He's still on the floor on his knees and Eddie can't think straight but he also can't breath and he feels like screaming, like punching the wall (which he won't do because he has at least some control on his emotions, thank you very much— and also because he's sure Athena would absolutely kill him and get away with it.)

"Eddie? What's wrong?" Buck asks, a small crease forming between his brows and Eddie's gaze can't help but to zero in on his still wet with saliva and a little bit of precum, soft lips.

It's really not fair how beautiful Buck is.

"I can't do this anymore. The— friends with benefits thing we have going on or whatever." Eddie runs his fingers through his hair as he clenches his jaw and looks away from Buck.

"W-what? Why? Did I- I do something wrong?" Buck stutters out as he stands up, trying to catch Eddie's eyes with his.

"No, I just— I don't want this. I don't want it to be like this." Eddie makes a vague gesture with his hand between them.

"How do you want it to be, then?" Buck asks and there's a tentative, shy but hopeful tone in his voice. It's tinged with possibility, Eddie thinks but that might be wishful thinking from his part.

He might be a little drunk and too tired of holding back, though, so he just blurts it out.

"I want you, Buck. All of you." He licks his lips nervously. "I want to come home.to you and I want to wake up in the mornings with you, and I want to be able to kiss you and touch you just for the sake of it, without having it led to sex— Which is great, by the way. I just— I want more."

Buck looks stunned, gaping at him with his mouth hanging open like he wants yo say something but he isn't sure what. Eddie doesn't give him the time to figure it out.

"And it's okay if you don't. Want that I mean." He swallows thickly. "I'll get over it, we'll be fine—"

"No."

"W-what?" Eddie's heart stutters, fear starting to brew inside his chest.

"Please don't get over it." Buck says and takes a step closer. "Please don't get over me." He whispers and closes the distance between them.

This kiss tastes different than all their other kisses. Eddie realizes with startling surprise that Buck's been holding back— this kiss is a cosmic event on itself but it's also soft and tender and full of emotion. It isn't as biting or demanding as the ones they've shared before.

It tastes of promises and of future.

It taste like home.

#demieddiediaz #evan buckley #eddie diaz #buck x eddie #buddie #buddie fic #911 fic #911 abc #911 on abc #april writes

[myseungsunglove]

The love we share | Hjs

Pairing: Han Jisung x reader

Warnings: fluff

Word Count: 660

𖠫Summary: The many ways you and Jisung express love for each other is something special. It’s something you never knew you needed and are endlessly thankful you have.

✎WIP✎: No particular thing planned right now. Send in asks or requests and we can see if it sparks any thoughts. No promises, but it might get me going!

◠ ◡ ◠᭚ιαᵕ̈

「© July 8, 2023 by mysweethannie」

You aren’t the type of person to say the words I love you often. You reserve those three words for meaningful situations. You want those eight letters to leave an impression when you utter them, so you kept them locked away in a vault like the precious treasure they are because for whatever reason you feel your resources are limited and you have to use them wisely so as to have enough to give to those most important to you.

Han Jisung is the complete opposite and seems to have an endless warehouse of I love yous to give. What confuses you the most about that is no matter how many times he says those three words, you know and feel just how much he means them. They aren’t just eight letters thrown around haphazardly. Each moment they are used is specifically picked and important. It just so happens that Han finds most moments rather important, no matter how small or insignificant they might feel to someone else.

“I love you so much,” he mumbles softly against your temple, pressing a firm kiss there as you brush your teeth each morning.

“I love you immensely,” he boasts confidently when you awaken sleepily from an afternoon nap wrapped in his arms.

“I love you endlessly,” he whispers gently as he makes love to you on a rainy summer night.

“I love you completely,” he assures you when you express your doubts about yourself on hard days.

“I love you so much,” he reminds you, even though you’ve been arguing.

“I really love you,” he tells you when you make him laugh so hard he just might cry.

“I love you the most,” he responds when you do finally utter those three words to him one night when you think he is fast asleep.

“I love you the most in the whole world,” he confidently declares when getting down on one knee and asking you to be his forever.

“I completely, madly love you,” he breathes against your lips, capturing your lips with a passionate and reverent kiss.

It’s not hard to understand and believe that Han Jisung loves you with everything he has. While you may not say those words as often, you show him just how deeply you love him with your actions.

I love you so much shows when you bring him dinner in the studio when he has been working tirelessly on a new album.

I love you immensely shows when you pack his bags for him when he is preparing to go on tour.

I love you endlessly shows when you cling to him in the night like you never want to let go, your bodies joined together in love.

I love you completely shows when you are there for Jisung during his hardest and most anxious times, holding him close and telling him all the ways he makes you whole and is enough just the way he is.

I love you so much shows when you resolve to not go to sleep angry but are determined to understand each other in your hardest times.

I really love you shows when you can’t stop laughing at Hannie’s completely ridiculous self, his joy bringing you more happiness than you could ever possibly imagine or understand.

I love you the most shows when you surprise him on tour when he is feeling the most exhausted and really needs you by his side.

I love you the most in the world shows when you put Han’s precious face between your hands and tell him “yes, I’ll spend the rest of my life with you. Loving you.”

I completely, madly love you shows when you tell him you’re pregnant with your first child and you can’t stop crying because of how excited you are to finally get to see him be a dad.

It’s not hard for Jisung to understand and believe that you love him with everything you have. They way you love each other is exactly what you never knew you needed so desperately.

#stray kids #stray kids x reader #han jisung #stray kids fluff #han jisung x reader #han jisung soft hours #han jisung oneshot #han jisung fic #soft thoughts with mia

[bambieyedoll]

request - hcs of protective bella ramsey taking care of reader :)

hi, love ! i’m so sorry for making you wait. this was so cute to write. thank you for the request, i hope you like it. ♡

bella would be there for you, no matter what.

if you needed help with something, they would happily provide you that help even if it was for something small like opening the door for you.

the fact that you relied on them made them feel proud and gave them a sense of protection over you.

you’d be a bit babied when you’re together.

just small things while you’re cuddling in their room. they would ask you about your day, if you wanted or needed something and reminding you that you could ask them for anything.

“it’s alright, love. i’m here for you”

if you suddenly get a fever and you’re told to stay in bed for a while, believe bella would be there for you.

they would give you soft touches with the back of their hand on your forehead, neck and cheeks.

always careful not to hurt you in any way.

bella would gently help you sit up and lean back against your pillows when it’s time for your medicine.

they would take care of everything for you and loved doing it, really. it was a way of showing you how much you mean to them.

“god, you’re freezing” bella said while holding both your hands trying to warm them with theirs. “let’s get you back to bed” their soft loving gaze over you while guiding you back to your bedroom.

some nights, you’d forget to add a blanket and the cold would make it hard for you to sleep comfortably.

bella would notice this and they’d silently place a fluffy blanket on you both, smiling when you stop moving in your sleep, keeping you close.

their protective nature would also apply to social media and the bad side that came with it.

bella would be against reading the comments people made about you and your relationship.

they would want to protect you from it.

making some type of deal with you and always reminding you that those were insignificant bored people with nothing else to do with their lives.

if you did read something negative about you by any chance, they would quickly reassure you. staying by your side and having a much needed talk about it.

would provide you hugs and cuddles afterwards.

“no, don’t shy away from me, you’re adorable!”

as your couple, bella personally made their responsibility to keep you happy and safe.

it would completely crush them knowing you’ve been hurt by some type of comment you heard or read.

the days you went out, just for a walk or on a date, bella would make sure to hold your hand while walking the streets.

sometimes people would surround you, asking for photos and autographs and they’d happily provide them but always making sure you’re by their side.

glancing at you almost every five seconds.

after that, bella would guide you pulling you closer by your waist while making your way though people.

one day, you were getting ready to go meet with your friends while bella just admired you from the couch.

“it’s cold outside, babe. please, wear a jacket” they would ask, genuinely worried.

after putting a jacket on and making sure you don’t forget anything, you’d make your way to the door waving goodbye with your hand but would stop when you hear bella’s voice calling you.

“you sure don’t think you’re walking out that door without giving me a kiss first, do you?” their puppy eyes looking at you.

you’d giggle and make your way back to them before leaning down and softly grabbing their chin to properly kiss them goodbye.

“i’ll miss you, go have fun”

#bella ramsey #bella ramsey x reader #fluff #bella ramsey x you #bella ramsey headcanons #bella ramsey x y/n #fanfic #request #lgbtq

[opultea]

Maybe It Was Always You

Xiao x GN Reader (No pronouns)

Romantic - Oneshot - Fluff - SFW

Word Count: 1.2k

Note: Loved loved loved writing this, my favourite writings are always secret character analyses lol (hope you enjoy!)

Perhaps Xiao had always wanted to love you.

Maybe he could admit that whenever he looked at you from afar, something deep within him would light up at the way you smiled, and then recoil as he reminded himself that he could never allow you to smile that way for him. But that was as much as he could ever admit.

Xiao took pride in his ability to stamp out any desire, any traces of mortal consciousness in his heart that made him yearn for worldly comfort. He did not need such frivolity. He was a Yaksha for Archon's sake; a creature of battle, an instrument of war. His heart had no room for simple temptations. He had no room for his heart.

So what was the tightness in the chest he swore was hollow? How could you fill him with more air than he thought possible to breathe? Maybe Xiao had always wanted to feel. Perhaps he never let himself stray too far from his position of duty because he couldn't know how. However gruelling it was to slay and strike and punish, it was almost comfortable. Xiao knew all of this well.

He knew not of how to speak to you.

"Which tea would you prefer Xiao?"

What kind of question was that? Why would a weapon like himself have any preferences? Was this a test of some kind? A cruel joke? How should he know what tea you'd like best? Of course you would make this difficult, you always found a way to make things difficult for him. Why was it always so hard to breathe around you?

"Does it matter?" He settled into his usual scowl. What he knew couldn't hurt him, right?

"Well, I guess not," You smiled warmly. You were always so warm. "But isn't it nice to indulge in little things that make you happy now and again?" Xiao clicked his tongue.

"Adepti do not indulge. Why would we ever have a need for such insignificant things?"

You took a moment to ponder the question, taking it as the genuine misunderstanding of someone who was used to an outsider's perspective rather than as criticism. You knew Xiao well enough by now to understand what he truly meant when he said such things.

"Well, I think that it's important for everyone to have things that bring them joy, no matter how insignificant they are. It makes living a little easier when you can rely on even the smallest things to make you happy,"

"Ease has never been the goal of my existence," Xiao argued, though the soft croak in his voice revealed what his words could not.

"Maybe not a goal, but you surely still need rest and recuperation?" Deciding Xiao was not going to pick a tea flavour, you plucked the one closest to you and began to brew it. "Like right now, we're having tea and chatting, even if it's not classically productive,"

"It is not... this... I would not call this an insignificant thing." That made you smile wide, your head tilting affectionately.

"Well for the record, you make me happy too Xiao,"

Maybe Xiao would never know if the racing in his chest was normal.

It was not uncommon for you to visit Wangshu Inn, but it felt as if the frequency of your visits had increased as of late. You would always start by greeting Verr Goldet, but the boss never kept you long before she ushered you upstairs, sneaking a knowing look toward the balcony.

For your first few visits, Xiao had not always been there, often out attending to his eternal duty. When the vigilant Yaksha returned to find you waiting on the balcony for him, it took him a moment to unfreeze.

“You need not waste your time waiting,” Xiao huffed.

"Well I come here mostly to see you, I think it would be a bit useless if I left without even accomplishing a hello,"

"You-" Xiao's reflex rebuttal caught in his throat. You came to see him. Maybe he would never figure out why that made his whole body feel light. "Then, the next time you come, call my name. I will arrive."

Now, you visited what felt like every other day, and each time you climbed to the tallest point of the inn and called the name of the Conqueror of Demons, he would dutifully appear. You both learnt to expect each other, and neither would dream of breaking the silent oath of commitment. Perhaps Xiao was pleased with the synergy you had created together.

It was a regular visit for you when Xiao asked that fateful question.

"Why do you persist?"

The night air was cool and crisp, the light breeze from the north still carrying some of the sweetness from its birthplace in Mondstadt. The two of you stood leaning against the railing of the balcony, savouring the time together. You blinked at the question, staring openly as if your gaze would be able to permeate the Adeptus’ mind.

“I’m sorry?”

“You endlessly approach me with conversation, as if I am like you,”

“And what am I like?”

“Mortal.”

You knew that Xiao had trouble accepting friendship; he had once told you that he was a weapon as if it was a fact of the world. But did he honestly still believe himself nothing more?

“Xiao,” you breathed softly. “I come to you because you make me happy, because I want to, because I desire your companionship. Is that not reason enough?”

Xiao turned his head away just enough that you couldn't see his face, but it did not do much to hide his ebbing emotion.

"It was never a good idea for you to interact with me, let alone so casually. I warned you as much." Xiao's head bowed slightly, as if his mind was tired from attempting to comprehend you. "And yet you persist. You come and you make me feel this way, and then you go and you make me feel even more. So why? Why are you doing this to me, to yourself?"

Xiao finally turned back to you, brow furrowed and eyes searching, maybe even hoping. You stepped closer, not wanting to scare him but wanting desperately for him to understand.

"Because you deserve to be loved, Xiao,"

His eyes widened in response, his whole body alight with confusion at the foreign thought. But somewhere just below the panic sat an old desire, a desperate part of him that craved the tenderness in your voice.

Perhaps that was all Xiao had ever wanted to hear. Maybe you were the only one his waking heart would ever allow to speak it. You, with your soft tones and gentle sincerity, your understanding nature and your persistence. Maybe your love was all he had ever dreamed of.

When you carefully opened your arms and stepped a fragment closer, Xiao was surprised at his willingness to accept the gesture. For a rare and incredible moment, he did not feel the weight of the world upon him. Only the comforting weight of you around his soul.

Perhaps you were all Xiao ever needed to feel free enough to love.

#fluff #genshin impact #genshin x reader #gn reader #no pronouns #sfw #genshin impact x reader #romantic #gender neutral reader #genshin impact x you #Xiao x reader #xiao genshin impact #Xiao x gn reader #alatus x reader #mutual pining #oneshot #xiao x reader oneshot #genshin impact x gn reader

[magicaa777]

𝑳𝒊𝒍𝒍’𝒔 MANIFESTING CLASS 101 -

In this post i will share with you all my tips and best tricks for wanting to manifest ANYTHING. Some of these tips are small and might seem insignificant but don’t let that fool you. THEY WORK.

Reminder ❗️

- these are things that work for me ! if you don’t agree with anything then keep that to yourself. thank you <3

Trick-Tip 1

journaling !!!!!!!!!

- I keep a journal that i call "everyday life/gratitude" and i try to write something small in it everyday. i always always write something about gratitude

example of what format i write in;

- someone/something i’m grateful for.

- A prayer or Angel numbers (depending on what your main belief is, i personally use both.)

- i draw some cute little things that make me happy

- finally i write something i want. BUT instead of saying "I want this, I want that" i say " I already have this, I already have that".

Trick-Tip 2

BELIEVING I ALREADY HAVE IT!

now, if you want to manifest something you must STOP saying stuff with "want" in it.

if you constantly want want want.. your going to get it but not now. because you want it it’s going to come eventually but not instantly.

when your manifesting or saying affirmations start by saying "have" if you start believing you already have it then you do.

Trick-Tip 3

MY YOUTUBE PLAYLIST!

this playlist has taken me quite a while to create but it has some of THE MOST !!!!! helpful videos about manifesting.

some of my favourites from this playlist

- How i manifested my mans - Anila Sita 101

- If you’re ready to give up on manifesting, this is for you. - Here Nor There

- Law of attraction… You’re doing it WRONG - Adonis Bjornson

- How we manifest - terrycolewhittaker

Trick-Tip 4

I often listen to vibration frequencies, it helps me calm down and helps my higher self focus on my manifestations

One of my all time favourites!

Trick-Tip 5

Believe Believe Believe.

You must believe ANYTHING can/will happen to/for you.

i know it’s so hard sometimes to imagine your dream life and it’s actually your reality now when your reality is … not so the same. i understand but please when i say BELIEVE. believe in yourself and believe in how powerful you are !

You are so powerful and you CAN do anything. you CAN manifest anything/anyone.

BELIEVE ! ♡︎

yours truly, 𝑳𝒊𝒍𝒍 .

#it girl #manifesting #girlboss #itgirl #law of assumption #law of attraction #law of manifestation #gaslight gatekeep girlboss #aesthetic #law of the universe #magicaa777 #manifesting manifesting manifesting #affirm and manifest 🫧 🎀✨ ִִֶָ ٠˟ #777 #loassumption #loa tumblr #loablr #loa blog #loa success #loassblog #loa

[pumpkzsafeplace]

baby pumpkin tips: how to care for a caregiver.

caregivers are one of the main aspects of regression and are sometimes referred to as superheroes for how much hard work they put into making sure their little is safe and looked after. but, they’re human too and deserved to be looked after and treated as such so here are some pumpkin tips to how to make them feel as special as they make others feel <3.

-> take over the routines ✅

if you do weekly plans with your caregiver like I do with mine, one cute thing that I tent to do is take over responsibility of your little routine. it can be a little difficult to do at first, but honestly the reaction of both confusion and proudness on your caregiver’s face is worth all the struggle <3.

-> give them a day off. 💤

caregivers practically work around the clock to ensure we’re happy and looked after, and sometimes it can get to them physically and mentally. not that we’re too much, it’s just that so many big feels can get a little bit too overwhelming sometimes.

so, giving your caregiver a day off from the usual responsibilities could help your dynamic so so much <3. you wouldn’t have to not speak to them, but you could simply hang out as friends or partners instead for that day & make some adorable memories <3.

-> plan a caregiver day. 🧡

another cute thing I’ve done is changed the plans for a day without daddy knowing and instead of our usual routine one weekend, we ended up having a caregiver’s weekend instead. this does kinda fall in the line of giving them a day off.

however instead of the both of you doing nothing- a caregiver’s day is a complete day dedicated to their likes and hobbies. for example, my daddy loves video games and the cornetto trilogy movies so i planned out weekend around that and make cute little snacks and some cocktails <3.

-> make them smile. 😊

most caregivers have learned how to burry down their emotions and ignore their needs to ensure that their little is happy and healthy.so, now- it’s our turn to look after them and make them happy and healthy, so check in on them.

ask how they are, and how they’re doing, ask if there is anything you can help with- anything at all, no matter how small and insignificant. remember to compliment them too, tell them you know they’re doing their absolute best and you’re proud of them <3.

-> give them a gift. 🎁

if you’re like me, then to show affection- you like to give gifts. now, i’m going to let you in on a baby pumpkin’s secret- home made and personal beats expensive and bought every single time. one of my daddy’s favourite gifts he’s ever received from me in our three-year relationship and dynamic is a homemade video I made him that captured our best moments throughout our relationship. now, he’s loved everything i’ve ever gave him- but that video is the one present he always goes back to <3.

-> remind them how special they are. 💟

any caregivers reading this, i just want to applaud you on your amazing efforts every day from the bottom of my heart <3. i know just how hard you all work just to ensure we’re looked after and happy, and i know how much you bottle up to keep yourselves strong for us <3.

you’ve do so so so much for us every day and sometimes we tend to take that for granted, so behalf on all littles, I just want to say we are so so so so so happy to have you in our lives- we wouldn’t be the same without all of you.

you’re all important, you’re all special and you’re all valid <3.

#sfw age regression #safe agere #sfw agere #sfw little blog #agere community #sfw little post #sfw little community #agere blog #age regression #agere little #age regressor #age re safe space #age re blog #age regressive #agere #agere lifestyle #sfw regression #age dreaming #agere positivity #agre regression #agere post #sfw little stuff #sfw interaction only #sfw littlespace #sfw furry #little community #agere caregiver #sfw caregiver #caregiverlife #caregiver little