#this literally connects to the victim blaming mindset | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ferie-anon · 3 years

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🐿🌱Mini Astro Observations 🌱🐿

Cancer placements sometimes can develop a victim mentality and might pin the blame on others (when its their own fault) and using whatever reason to back it up. This is when underdeveloped tho, and once they handle their emotions better and channeling it out healthily it won’t be a problem. Thus when underdeveloped, the victim mentality is like something they go to when feeling “defensive” or unable to properly handle the emotional conflict/argument or their emotions running strongly throughout the moment.

Taurus moon ppl in general are the chillest ppl they can be, they just vibe with others/with friends when they meet up. Ppl may often feel welcome to talk/relay their worries to them or there is a sense of reliability or warmth they feel with them, they feel grounded and supportive in their own emotions and decisions that you admire and seek comfort/advice from them. Earth energy brings dependability to the moon, so they are able to be emotionally comforting or helping to stabilize a conflict/issue mentally or realistically.

A undeveloped or not matured virgo moon can create for a very toxic mindset at times, as virgo moons naturally have the tendency to want control or aim for perfection over certain things, if undeveloped it can create a very toxic attitude towards others, like they may demand a lot, nitpick too much or come off as too controlling.

Aries placements and virgo rising look good in short hair, I see a lot of aries energy don short hair so well or get their hair cut and also dress casually or “not super dressed up” but still look put together and an icon. Virgo rising may like short hair and they look great with it as it rlly accentuates and shows off their neat yet youthful vibes and their facial features. Plus short hair is easier to take care of so they may also have an easy time with that.

Virgo placements may look good in formal attire, neat attire, and suits/any professional wear (dress shirt,pants, blazer, business suit etc). Or also they may enjoy having some neat style/neat coordinating in their looks and dressing, like it will always look put together in a well or well thought out. (Like coordinate color palette, balance the look, neat accessories -bags etc)

Earth mercuries can be dry texters sometimes, when they just want to respond bluntly, simple, and direct. It especially irks air mercuries haha, but earth mercuries are just very straight forward/rather keep it simple and not draw it out long with explanations and details. But air mercuries live for the discussion and continuing conversations, so both elements have their contrasting differences yet positively.

^Continued from earth mercuries part: Which is why the difference in energies spent upon communicating where air mercuries can spend a lot of time online texting or talking, whereas earth mercuries would not have the energy/want to waste their time with a long conversation sometimes.

Gemini placements can literally find anything/search for it or has a record or can pull it out to show you. I have 2 gemini sun friends who literally screenshot and keep all the history of their messages and don’t delete it becuz either they wanna look back or keep the texts lol. Also my other gemini sun friend also can find anythingg lmao or she will be able to invest the time and effort to find/extensively search the information through google online or any social platform/media.

Often, 12th house in a certain placement can make that certain trait be unnoticeable/not present at first meeting or glance till they get to know you better. Ex: if you have Sun in Aries in 12th house, ppl may not think you act like an aries or have those qualities till they’re closer to you and see.

Sun in 12th individuals have a lot of say, are very knowledgeable as they gather and absorb information and knowledge and connect them together (12th house’s rules of the unseen, spiritual realm, secrets, hidden info) but these natives may not be heard of a lot or not express their full thoughts and insights at first as it can often be overlooked at first or hidden in some way of their bright expression and ideas as sun is in 12th. The sun embodying the personality/native’s self and expression can be hidden to others at first. Ppl with sun in 12th may have others surprised at the amount of expressing and how deep their perspectives go, as others don’t notice these qualities at first.

It’s my first astro observations and it’s not a lot I hope you guys enjoyed it ✨🐿🌱💖🐥

#post #astro observation #astro observations #astrology #virgo #taurus #cancer #signs #zodiac signs #12th house #aries #gemini #moon #air signs #ferie anon

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plan-d-to-i · 2 years

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I did a great foolish thing and reacted to an anti-jfm article. Now more anti-jfm articles are under my reaction and I can not forgive myself. I also want to answer everyone or just die😭

Why do people behave as if Fengmian is a bitch because he has all the power of the world and does not stand in the way of their love (yzy)? ... sorry im just tired

Ahh I'm sorry! I guess you're talking about this post. I completely understand the irresistible urge to engage when you see something so false. Sadly there's little point in having a discussion with people who reason things out like that. If they could have understood, they would have understood already. I would say just ignore them now, since you said your piece (and beautifully so) unless you're fine with an infinite back and forth that will lead nowhere. As for the post itself...

"she's not the ONLY villain." - strong start... who is saying YZY is the oNLy villain in mdzs. This was just a weird opening that makes zero sense and does a good job prefacing the absurdity that will follow. People don't think she's "the only villain" they are just tried of others excusing her tantrums and saying she's justified when the story itself makes it clear she's not.

"There was resentment within her heart. She simply wanted to let out the rage, even if it made no sense. All the rest were quiet as they endured her temper." (Chapter 52)

"her husband is just sitting there exhibiting such clear favoritism" - lol this line was written by jc and yzy ...

"so you're only here to break up this engagement if Wei Wuxian doesn't approve?" - Clearly JFM broke off the engagement because Jin Zixuan was making it good and clear he did not want to be married to YanLi or see anything of value in her, and as her father JFM didn't want her to be locked in a marriage as miserable as his own. He prioritized her happiness over making politically advantageous connections. In the setting of the novel that's an extremely loving, kind thing to do for his daughter. The fact that Jin Zixuan's one braincell then decided he wanted YanLi is not JFM's fault. In fact as the author of the same post goes to contradict themselves "ultimately I think that worked in xuanli's favor and was good for them" lol ... 🌝

"It matters that she does things specifically TO the protagonist" -yes that's how antagonists work...

"And we really can't discount the misogyny in giving JFM a pass that she doesn't get" feminism doesn't actually = giving abusers a pass and victim blaming, but go off op give us nothing.

"Who immediately was like "hey son say goodbye to your dogs (the only gift I have ever given you)" - ah let's wrap an absurd assumption in a clear innacuracy- Literally nowhere does it say that puppies were jc's onLy gift. Even using some weird reductive mindset of "if it's not written clearly it didn't happen" unless jc popped out of YZY holding a sword that's immediately discredited. OFC jc is more logically likely as a privileged Clan heir to have received other gifts that are just not mentioned bc the author assumed readers come to the story with a bare minimum of common sense... Item two, let's not forget that JFM sent the dogs away on the second day after WWX, who had been mauled by them throughout his childhood struggling for food, suffered for an entire day and still, understandably couldn't overcome his his phobia.

"Immediately, his hands went up to his face and he wailed, soon bawling his eyes out. He was in Jiang FengMian’s arms the entire day, not coming down no matter what. On the second day, Jiang Cheng’s puppies were given to someone else.

This angered Jiang Cheng so much that he threw a big tantrum. No matter how much Jiang FengMian comforted him gently"

novel: "No matter how much Jiang Fengmian comforted him gently."

op: "Like what kind of asshole says to his small child "say goodbye to your dogs here's your new brother! ok sleep tight in your new shared room I'm off to bed byeeeeee.""

.... idk ig some weird random imaginary one in op's mind

"JFM isn't strict, he just doesn't care."-

"The founder of the YunmengJiang Sect, Jiang Chi, was born a rogue cultivator. Jiang clan members valued openness, honesty, levelheadedness, and unguardedness, all of which conflicted with Lady Yu’s personality. However, Jiang Cheng’s appearance and temperament all resembled his mother’s. He hadn’t ever been to Jiang FengMian’s liking. Since birth, he taught him in many ways, yet he still couldn’t change..." (Chapter 56)

JFM is trying to shape the future Clan Leader of the YunmengJiang Clan to uphold the principles and ethos of that Clan and live by its motto. jc makes no effort to change or learn, preferring instead to pick up his mother's self absorbed, self serving, deeply classist views that resonate with his own nature. In what world would this translate to him earning his father's whole hearted approval?

"Jiang Cheng, “It served you right to be bored to death. You shouldn’t have played the hero and you shouldn’t have cared for such a hell of a thing. If in the beginning you didn’t…”

Suddenly, Jiang FengMian spoke, “Jiang Cheng.”

Jiang Cheng paused, knowing that he had said too much. He was quiet at once.

Jiang FengMian didn’t look as if he was blaming him of anything, but his expression had turned from calm to more solemn, “Do you know in which ways what you just said is not appropriate?”

Jiang Cheng’s head hung low, “Yes.”

Wei WuXian, “He’s just angry and speaking without care.”

Seeing how Jiang Cheng’s mouth and heart were still at odds, how he still felt defiant, Jiang FengMian shook his head, “A-Cheng, there are some things that can’t be said even if you’re angry. If you said them, it means that you still don’t understand the motto of the Jiang Sect, that you still don’t…” (Chapter 56)

We're clearly shown how even in the present, even after he'd already "tried in countless ways" to teach jc, JFM is still gently trying to guide him when YZY busts in and accuses him of not caring. jc is also shown again refusing to take in his father's words and instead agreeing with his mother's rant. He hurts WWX right after that scene to "teach him a lesson". The lesson being the exact opposite of what his father had tried to convey:

"As he spoke he slapped right at the middle of Wei WuXian’s chest. Although medicine and bandages had already been applied to the branded wound, being slapped out of the blue still brought immense pain. Wei WuXian roared, “Jiang Cheng!!! Come to your death!!!”

Jiang Cheng ducked from his strike and shouted, “You’re hurting so much now, but why did you play the hero back then?! Serves you right! Teaches you your lesson!”

Wei WuXian, “Was I playing the hero?! I had no other choice either, I was moving faster than I could think!"

And to be clear, JFM is literally just trying to teach jc to be a better human being, something that's actually important when someone will be handed a measure of power and influence over others. Something jc fails at miserably at as a Clan leader, as people are too terrified to go to him for help and he's teaching Jin Ling to murder and to cheat even by putting others in harm's way. It's just easier for jc to complain he's not getting praised because his father doesn't like him than to admit he needs to improve his character. Imagine if we just didn't take the words of clearly abusive people and characters, like YZY and jc at face value...

#mdzs #answers #canon jiang cheng #yu ziyuan #madam yu

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jitterbugjive · 3 years

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Something I wish more people would understand is how unhealthy and misguided I was in my early 20s. I came out of a life of mental and sexual abuse, for a bit I had a much older boyfriend than me that I didn’t realize until fairly recently was grooming me since I was 14. I was a hyper sexual teenager due to the exposure I had in childhood and I sought people out constantly to ERP with, even adults, without really thinking anything was wrong with that. I had an old friend who started running away from home to look for random adult men to sleep with so my understanding and feelings towards that kind of situation got all twisted and confused and I didn’t know how to help my friend. I had another friend who was pulled in to a 3 way by another minor and an adult, and the other minor was also the sort who actively looked for adult men who would be sick enough to sleep with her. And my best friend had a sister who was also exhibiting this behavior despite my friends’ many protests, because their mom didn’t give a single fuck about anything. I had an older babysitter, by older I mean in his 60s, who would bring up conversations about sex with me and show me porn on TV from when I was 10-13. I was dealing with unchecked PTSD which made me overly reactive, prone to fits of anger and anxiety.

My point is, back then I didn’t have any kind of professional help or anywhere I could go for answers on things I didn’t understand or had a limited understanding of. When I ask the question ‘what do you do if a kid is seeking out adult sexual attention’ it’s not because I’m trying to blame kids for this, it’s because it scares me when kids are unknowingly, maybe even knowingly, exposing themselves to danger for whatever screwed up reason they may have. And no one wants to talk about that kind of situation, so I couldn’t find any answers. I couldn’t find an appropriate way to process my feelings on the matter, my understanding of it, the way I viewed it, I couldn’t find what the correct way to feel or deal with it was. Again, because no one wants to talk about it. With my naivety and personal experience, I at first held resentment towards kids like that, because I remember being put in danger because of them or they put my friends in danger, and those kids seemed very sure of their choices even when they were perfectly aware it was wrong. One of them I knew, even as an adult, didn’t ever think anything was wrong with what they did, they didn’t come with that regret you hear most people talking about. I regret the way I’ve reacted to these situations and I regret the way I phrased things when I was trying to come to terms with this issue that I’d been honestly traumatized by.

Another thing I didn’t understand in my early 20s was appropriate boundaries, because I wasn’t given appropriate boundaries as a kid I only knew one big basic thing: Don’t do anything sexually explicit with minors.

And when it came to RP, I thought that meant PG13 content was okay. I thought if there was a fade to black, or a time skip, or an implication, it wouldn’t be a bad thing. Now, there are literally only 2 instances I can think of where there was any sort of implication of sexual acts between characters with a minor, I still made sure nothing explicit was shown or explored and I was of the impression that I was just letting the other person have fun because that’s what they were in to. And that was a mistake. Not as big of a mistake as it could have been, mind you, but I’d never cross that line. I thought I had a good line drawn in the sand but I didn’t really understand where it was supposed to be. Because if we’re gonna be honest here, looking back I know now even romantic fluff RP between an adult and a minor isn’t okay, even if it’s through characters and not as ourselves.

I know now how much of an emotional impact RP can have on a person, considering most of my romantic relationships started with RP. When you have a character you deeply connect to interacting with someone else’s character, it’s really easy to start mistaking your character’s feelings for your own. You could believe because your characters get along so well that maybe the two of you can get along romantically too. I’m not saying that RP shouldn’t lead to romance, but that it can easily blind a person from how their RP partner really is. So it’s dangerous to RP with kids like this. I should know, my abusive ex that groomed me until I turned 18 in order to date me certainly had me convinced we were meant for each other just because our characters clicked and my character happened to be a representation of myself.

Something I’m really ashamed to admit as well is a serious misjudgement on my part, where for some reason I assumed bodily fluids weren’t NSFW. Probably because I’ve seen people get away with censoring out naughty bits but leaving the spunk in an image, or just drawing the character with spunk on them or something. Point is, people were getting away with it not being flagged as porn, and my dumb brain was like ‘okay so it’s not that bad’. I need to make something clear here, I don’t entirely remember what happened or why it happened, but it’s true that Bedeviled Derpy had a post that showed spunk in 2 of the images and it was drawn from some sketches of mine by a teenager. I don’t believe I would have requested such a thing, I certainly didn’t script it to say ‘draw spunk here’, in fact the sketches don’t show any indication of a mess anywhere. I just remember being given the finished images with the spunk being added, and I was dumb enough to think “oh yeah this is totally okay for a SFW blog” and my brain didn’t even register like ‘hello yes a child drew this maybe ask them to remove the spunk also spunk isn’t sfw or child friendly in any way shape or form’

Some people, maybe only a handful, or more, I don’t know, but some people have this assumption that my mindset in all of this was like “Hahaha I’m taking advantage of a minor” and that’s just... not it?

I’m a colossal dumbass, I admit that, and I was really irresponsible, but it was NOT because I had any intentions on preying on a child. I just don’t do that.

The things I said and did, I did out of ignorance, and most of the bad stuff people talk about me saying was from 5+ years ago, before I got any help, before I had anyone to walk me through these incredibly complex emotions and opinions that were ingrained in my head since childhood.

I just wish that people could see I had no malice or ill intent, I wish people could realize they’re way overthinking my actions and taking things a lot more personally than they were ever meant to be. Maybe if they could see this for what it is rather than assuming I’m a villain who purposefully did everything wrong, they could learn to move on in a healthy way.

I understand I did a lot of harm and there’s no undoing that.

But I do NOT deserve to be accused of pedophilia. Pedophilia has literally ruined my life and my perception of the world. I’m a victim too, and just because I became an adult doesn’t mean I suddenly know right from wrong. That’s not how becoming an adult works. You’re allowed to make mistakes as an adult, being an adult doesn’t mean you won’t make mistakes any more. Yes it’s easier to say to someone ‘you were just a kid, it was a mistake, you didn’t know any better’, but adults have a hard time knowing ‘any better’ too. We’re always growing and learning and I’d like to think people are smart enough to see that I have grown in to a better person.

I hope people can find it in their hearts to forgive me, but I fear some people are too far gone down the rabbit hole of being convinced that everything was on purpose and from malice, that I’m some evil mastermind who thrives on manipulation and taking advantage of kids. I’ve only ever associated with 2 minors since becoming an adult and I have no intention of associating with any more that aren’t directly connected to my family or my friends.

Anyone who actually knows me would know I have a 0 tolerance for IRL pedophilia, when I found out a member of one of my groups was showing nudes to minors he was immediately kicked out and I kept tabs on the situation to make sure he’d be caught by police. When a member in my server was exposed for ERP and orbiting with a minor, I kicked him out too.

I worry about kids to a point that it’s part of my PTSD, I have anxiety attacks just worrying about how a kid might be getting harmed, the last thing I want to do is bring harm to them.

And I did cause harm, I didn’t know that was what I was doing, but I did, because I wasn’t mature enough to understand how to interact with kids as an adult. And again, I’m just incredibly sorry things had to even come to this. I’m not lying when I say I think about this every single day, and sometimes spiral in to really bad anxiety because of it. It affects me heavily.

I want to move on.

And I want the people affected to move on too.

Because dwelling on this isn’t going to do anyone any good.

#apology #important

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chryuhwan · 3 years

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helloooo i’m sol (21+, they/them) and this is yuhwan. he’s an old oc revamped too many times so if he seems familiar... my b dude i’m attached i guess. anyway, i’m excited to be here! please like this post if you’re interested in plotting and i’ll hit you up. i’m not on twitter and pretty sparse on discord, so i prefer tumblr im! but if that’s difficult for you, we can figure smth out! i have a short (haha) tl;dr under the cut, but you can also read up more on his BIO and PROFILE pages.

RUNDOWN

TRIGGER & CONTENT WARNINGS: physical abuse, underage drug/alcohol consumption, (attempted) suicide (lmk if you want a redacted summary!)

BASICS — born and raised in busan up until the tender age of seventeen, when he was sent (“exiled”) to seoul to live with his aunt and uncle and attend hannam. the catalyst was a rebellious phase turned lifestyle (a lot of really reckless decisions involving drugs, alcohol, vandalism, swiping money from the tithes & offerings, u name it) and his parents deciding they a) didn’t want to deal with that and b) didn’t want that to reflect on their reputations. he’s been in seoul ever since and has never stayed in busan for longer than a couple of days.

ON RELIGION & FAITH — the only son of the head pastor of a well-known megachurch in busan, yuhwan was raised under the strict and watchful eye of his obsessive parents! he’s not religious anymore by any means, but faith (or his lack thereof) has shaped a huge part of his mentality. his lack of belief in a higher power is the foundation of his ‘if i have the confidence to own up to the potential consequences of my actions, then i’ll do whatever i want to’ mindset. he’s not going to be discouraged by a god that doesn’t exist!

ON SEOUL — hates it. yep. he hates seoul, but he doesn’t really have the drive to try to find somewhere he does like because he hates busan too. when he was sent to live with his aunt and uncle, he was treated pretty poorly (still flinches when people raise their hand at him), like a glorified punching bag. hannam wasn’t any better, and the military was nice in the way prison cells might be. he hates cramped things and the only decent jogging path he knows runs him right by the bridge he almost jumped off of after his military service ended so. you know. you win some, you lose some.

ON HANNAM — hated it. yep. straight up hated it. he was pretty good about being friendly around virtually anyone who held his attention for more than a couple of seconds, but yuhwan hates the idea of hierarchies! finds them downright stifling, and he doesn’t like the idea of being placed in a box, etc. hannam felt like an oppressive social pyramid and he thought that kinda sucked so as friendly as he was on the outside, he had zero interest in making friends and has probably only willingly kept in touch with a handful of people since graduating.

ON GOSSIPS, RUMORS, AND SECRETS — he’s a tabloid writer. once a regular editor for a small newspaper, he gave that up and decided to sacrifice his morals for a higher paycheck. he blames his mom because she, as the pastor’s wife, had a lot of access to juicy gossip and liked to tell yuhwan about it. yuhwan’s probably the least trustworthy person he knows. he’s careful to keep the secrets of people he cares about, but as it turns out, he doesn’t really care about that many people. he’s friendly, open to listening, and honestly not that bad at giving advice etc., but be on your guard. wouldn’t want your dirty laundry to be aired out for the world to see, after all.

ON THE PRESENT — he’s minding his own business. really. like i said, he’s probably kept in touch with some people, but otherwise he’s not really interested in the busy lives of almost-strangers unless they’re going to get him a bonus on his next paycheck. yuhwan very much so marches to the beat of his own drum. he doesn’t care much about the world around him and only cares when it inconveniences him. like a kite without a string, he’s floating wherever the fuck the wind’s going to take him!

ON HIS SECRET — after graduating from high school, and then university, and then finishing military service, yuhwan thought he might literally lose his fucking mind if he didn’t set himself free in one way or another. ultimately, he decides he won’t be able to coexist in peace with his parents unless they change. and because they won’t change of their own volition, he submits an anonymous tip about his father’s embezzlement of church funds. in the end, it doesn’t destroy his dad’s legacy or anything; the church is still up and running—but it’s an ordeal that takes months, years of being humbled by the weight of the world. he doesn’t feel bad about it. his mom gossips less and his dad’s less of an asshole, after all. makes family gatherings that much more bearable when they’re all tired of existing!

CONNECTIONS

BEST FRIEND — just one. no dramatic childhood friends story or anything like that. just one person he actually really genuinely sincereeeeeely liked from hannam that didn’t take any effort or slow build to figure out. probably the only person he really trusts in this big, bad city. you’ve got a huge weapon in your hands! he’s not used to putting this much trust in others. (+1000 if in a two-day relationship that ended terribly. ‘i would never date you again, but i’ll still die for u’ kinda vibes)

HANNAM FRIENDS — there won’t be many, but! anyone? anyone?? he was a friendly, easygoing person (still is, tbh) during his hannam days, but was definitely a free spirit who did whatever he wanted. if you could keep up with his pace, then he might have liked your company. he’s not a fan of overly serious people unless they have the patience of a saint! (trust me, you’ll need it.)

HANNAM... NOT FRIENDS — he’s not so conscious of his surroundings as to have enemies himself, but he definitely did get pushed around for a little while when he was first getting settled. and he’s also definitely spoken out of turn and said some rude shit (not on purpose) (he just doesn’t have a filter) here and there. want to hate his guts? please do. negative energy’s welcome in this house!

COUSIN — a similar-aged cousin, also the child of the aunt and uncle yuhwan absolutely fucking abhors. they might have a contentious relationship. might even be a positive one. either way, they lived under the same roof for a few years!

TABLOID VICTIM — got a little fame to your name? have a nasty scandal you didn’t want to get out? well, now it’s out. and sensationalized, too! maybe you know it’s him who leaked it (and wrote the article, while we’re at it). maybe you don’t!

BUSAN BUDDIES — and i use the word ‘buddies’ loosely. grow up in busan? have religious parents? religious yourself maybe? well, maybe you bumped into each other then. yuhwan had the reputation of being a prim and proper pastor’s son, amiable and cheerful and so so devoted, up until he was suddenly sent to seoul. all of his bad habits and reckless adventures were largely done behind his parents’ backs (until he got caught, at least!)—you know of them? partake in them, maybe? or maybe you didn’t know, and you’re wondering why the fuck he came to seoul in the first place

BLACKMAIL — he’s not above using underhanded tactics if they’re made available to him. sometimes he doesn’t even need a big reason. maybe he found out a secret of yours and he wants a secret you know about someone else. he’ll hold it over your head! call it a little game of cat and mouse!

#thank you for the welcomes! will get to them soon #chrintro

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fireemblems24 · 3 years

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Speaking as a Hongkonger who has friends wrongfully arrested and worse, killed, just for supporting the independence and autonomy of our homeland, I, along with many of the people I know who have played 3H, am absolutely disgusted by Edelgard's "your homeland belongs to me because it used to be a part of my country and what you think doesn't matter, so my war of conquest is justified because I say so" mindset. It also reminds me too much of the CCP for me to ever truly enjoy Edelgard's character

Add the oppression of free speech, secret police, art sanctioning, propaganda, demonising religions and religious persecution, scapegoating a minority race which led to the genocide of their people, hiding parts of history to justify yourself, a meritocracy with a dictator on the top who has all the power in the country concentrated on them and no term limit as well as being the one who chooses the successor, assassinations of people who oppose them, putting down rebellions bloodily, starving your people for a war of ego (let’s be real, the only reason why Adrestia wants Faerghus and Leicester back under their reign is because the Emperors’ ego is hurt by how certain people don’t want them to be their leaders), calling people of a foreign nation fighting for their country traitors, victim blaming all the defenders hurt by her war, experimenting on people to be used as weapons, organ harvesting of a certain oppressed race and writing out an entire nation out of history which destroys their culture because she refuses to acknowledge their sovereignty plus, you know, all the brainwashing Edelgard is doing to your character and all the other Black Eagles, I have to say, unapologetically, that I absolutely loathe her. From what I’ve heard and seen from the polls on the gaming forums in our parts of the world, Edelgard is immensely unpopular, if not the most hated character in both Hong Kong and Taiwan, and interestingly, China as they also have experience with Imperialism in WW2 unapologetically, especially since this game came out during the height of the political turmoil in HK, made me vomit. Ironically, seeing how Faerghus triumphs over Adrestia in the end despite being in shambles at the start, despite the hopelessness and the powerlessness the Blue Lions felt, how they manage to overthrow the tyrannical Cornelia (seriously, she also reminds me of Carrie Lam, the Chief Executive of HKSAR. I mean, evil incompetent puppet leader installed by the tyrannical conquerors?) by working together, AM actually brought me the hope I needed during my darkest times. (ask ends)

This is pretty serious and heavy and there’s a lot to unpack here. There’s a very good chance I’ll miss something, and I’m really underqualified to discuss some of this I feel.

First off, I’m so disgusted about how people in power have treated China lately, turning a blind eye to atrocity after atrocity. I stand with Hong Kong, and I’m so, so sorry you’ve had to go through that. I literally can’t even imagine what that’s like.

I can easily see why someone who’s dealt with what you have would have such an overwhelmingly negative opinion of Edelgard. I wouldn’t be surprised at all if countries who do most of the Imperializing have a better opinion of her overall and the ones who have suffered at the hands of countries doing the Imperializing have an overall more negative one. I think I remember someone saying there was some poll saying South Korea wasn’t a fan - and not at all surprised they’d react badly to her - written by the Japanese no less. And while I do feel there’s more to her character and beliefs, I feel it’s highly tainted by this very black/white portrayal of her conquering.

But that’s quite the laundry list of accusations against Edelgard. I’m not going to touch on all of them except to say I’ve definitely seen her do some things (enabling human experimentation, scapegoating a minority race, etc . . . ), but I don’t really remember anything about art sanctioning or starving her own people. Regardless though, just her “I will enforce my enlightened beliefs on your country because I know better than you and it’s for your sake” getting portrayed straight-up and unironically is enough. You wouldn’t even really need any of those other things to have some eyebrow raising about some of the decisions IS made in the writing room about her.

That said, I’m glad the Blue Lions route was such a powerful and uplifting story for you. I’m always amazed at the power fiction can have even though I’ve experienced it myself. The Kingdom is by far the biggest underdogs among all the players in all routes, and I’m so looking forward to the cathartic moments when I inevitably take down Cornelia and eventually triumph over the Empire too. Blue Lions going to such a dark place is going to make the victory all the sweeter and more meaningful.

I’m really glad you sent this ask, and I hope I didn’t leave anything out. It’s really amazing how much this game connects with people for better or worse.

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gwynpool · 3 years

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it’s 2AM and i just finished Rule of Wolves (spoilers definitely up ahead)

first, to inform everyone, i read the spoilers when it got leaked in twitter cuz i can’t help myself. (it’s a sickness, i know) i think this is important since it definitely influenced my perspective upon reading the book. also, this is my first time being early in a party so yay me! going in ROW was easy for me because i started King of Scars the day before book 2’s actual release date so everything’s fresh.

secondly, this is really long so i’m sorry. i just have a lot of feelings and need to write it all down. on with the rant.

King of Scars was wonderful to me since it gave me my favorite Shadow and Bone character and the girl who i used to hate for being a mean girl but who I now admire with every ounce of my being. It also introduced a new ship that I am now obsessed with and is ruling besides my love for Jude&Cardan. Not to mention, it gave us Nina, whom though i’m not entirely a fan of due to all my love focusing on Kaz and Inej, allowed the connection between Shadow&Bone with SixofCrows.

Moving on, ROW was a ride and whirlwind of emotions. unfortunately, it wasn’t always the best kind.

I love the fantasy elements of it (tho it was a huge leap especially with the saints power thingy) and the politics because i am a sucker for scheming and stealing thrones.

the zoyalai teasing and angst was painful but in the best way since slowburn is what keeps me going.

nina finding comfort (and attraction, apparently) from hanne made my heart flutter because i haven’t gotten over matthias but this allowed a sort of closure and next chapter for our waffle-loving queen.

the promised wedding by leigh wasn’t what i expected but i’m not complaining since david&genya deserved nothing but happiness.

almost everything seems going well (aside from the fact that aleksander was ressurected apparently)and then everything crashes and burns and i just have to wonder why?

so the promised funeral alongside the wedding one, immediately comes after two? three? chapters as they were attacked during the afterparty of the wedding. and guess what? leigh killed the fcking groom.

the thing is i already knew he was going to die (with the spoilers and all) but i did not expect it to come immediately after the freaking wedding. not even halfway through the book!

being spoiled, i think, took most of the pain from the event but it doesn’t lessen the fact that it was completely unnecessary??? like though the characters grieved, nothing much was affected from his death? also, don’t talk to me about the character development for the survivors from this tragic event because there. was. absolutely. NONE.

and then we have the fricking darling ressurected. i love him in the first book of the grishaverse though i knew he was still a villain, don’t get me wrong. and my heart ached but was also relieved with his death in the third. he also inspired one of my all-time favorite fantasy villain(antihero?) in the form of Adelina Amouteru in the Young Elites series.

Ceased to be a Darklina fan and am now shipping Aleksander with Adelina because their power tho? like clings to like and they are both imbued with unfathomable darkness. somebody write fics please.

but bringing him back was what for exactly? leigh bardugo preached on how toxic the darkling character was and how we really shouldn’t like him in terms of agreeing with his ideals and yada yada. and yet she brings him back because apparently, he’s the only one paying her bills.

his conversation with alina tho had me expecting some darklina crumbs with fan service on the side since the stans were all raving about it on twitter *vomiting noises from toxicity* but i was surprised since it just further reminded us of how he truly is a villain in his very core and would do anything to get what he wants. so all in all it wasn’t entirely awful and it actually made me like Mal a bit. (never was a fan of him but that’s my issue, not the character’s)

setting aside the darkling issue a bit, the POV from Mayu was skippable. i mean obviously it still needs to be read for the Shu politics and the khergud existence but it just made me want to go to the next pov. Same goes for the “the monk’s” POV since you all know how i feel about him and the cult with it’s assembly and shit ended up also being unnecessary towards the end. honestly, i could do without the journey of the starless saint and his cult.

i truly enjoyed the fjerdan plot to my surprise and i like how nina kind of went through the last of us 2 circle of hate journey. it was definitely difficult knowing her pain and all that she went through and still choosing to be the better person. and yet, i can’t help but be more proud of her development. also, the supposed death of hanne got me going for a second and was actually ready to storm leigh’s home to fix her mistake. thank god it was plot twist. that’s all i have to say on the nina POV because i don’t wanna ruin my good feeling on this.

the crows cameo gave us a mini heist and it just made me miss reading their adventures. also the suli scene tugged at my heart.

imma skip zoya’s transformation but it utterly made me feel amazing and i have never been more glad that she’s kind of overpowered. she deserves it so fck all them haters. you can choke.

nikolai’s revelation and decision for the ravkan throne was not all that surprising, even without my knowledge of the spoilers. i honestly had a feeling that he was always his best self when he was strumhond and he only chose to fulfill the duties of the king because at that time, there was no other choice. so him giving up the throne to his beloved soldier, summoner and saint was a quite satisfying choice of route. there has been some others who would contest nikolai’s decision to step down as something unnecessary in the grand scheme of things but i would stand by my belief that nikolai made the best choice for ravka and for himself. not to say that i didn’t want to see both the queen and king side by side ruling but what are fanfictions for?

zoyalai is canon and endgame. finally. i can die now.

now the last two chapters was a toss up. for the first one was the darkling’s sacrifice. okay, so i was also spoiled by this from twitter but when i was reading the book, i keep expecting it to be brought up and it wasn’t. so i honestly thought that maybe that spoiler was a prank. lo and behold it was not and it wasn’t until the very last end. so the buildup was goddamn awful. the whole concept of the thorn wood and sort of atlas moment was just no. like you’re just springing this up now? when we’re supposed to be tying up loose ends but making sure it had history and buildup to well, back it up.

also leigh outright writing genya saying it was not a redemption for the darkling and him being unapologetic about his crimes (basically being a truly evil asshole) doesn’t remove the fact that it still comes off as a redemption arc especially with what is now the synopsis of SOC 3 but ill get to that. he still was the one who did a heroic deed and that fucks me up because it was just devastating to me after making peace with his end in ruin and rising. not because i was hurt that he died yet again boohoo but because it kind of invalidates everything that alina, genya, zoya and countless other victims went through.

on a side note, the darling stans on twitter who keeps defending his actions, i would really advise you to reflect on your decisions cuz it is honestly unhealthy. also, you lot talking smack about nikolai and zoya refusing to sacrifice their lives? stop twisting the story to suit your toxic admiration, nikolai was even first to offer up his life and would do so if it was actually possible. so just go hide in your darkling cocoon and stop hating on other characters to justify your favored aleksander.

the very last chapter aka coronation was good because it gave us inej ghafa cameo as captain of her ship and bonding with our resident privateer and also genya, alina and zoya bonding. but it was bad because apparently the darkling chronicles is still not over and now we’re supposed to grant him death like that’s going to make everything okay? i know forgiveness and breaking the circle of hate and revenge is a huge theme in this duology but honestly, this is just too extreme. with nina it was understandable and the people she hated were born of twisted mindset and circumstances but the darkling? hahahah no. he is a literal immortal who was delusional so now that he’s paying for his crimes, you want to allow him death because you have nightmares? zoya, goddamit no! same to you genya and alina. and so this will be the plot for the third six of crows? why can’t we just stop making this about him. now he gunna steal kaz’s thunder? over my dead body.

in the end, i gave this book 4 stars in goodreads because if i ignore the darkling plot, it was a really good use of politics and fantasy merging in a storyline. i can’t fault leigh for choosing to do this since it’s still her book so i definitely don’t have a right to dictate what i expected from this. also, i have a half a mind to believe that she fell in love with ben barnes and had him in mind writing this so i really cannot blame her because i have been under that man’s charms since prince caspian came out. the spoilers i read made me more open in reading this (backwards thinking but eh that’s how i roll) so i’m not at all crushed by what transpired. it was just weird and was lackluster in its attempt to give ravka some sort of peace. frankly, i just want to read the third six of crows book to maybe find some sort of calm in all this craziness and also delve in some zoyalai fanfiction because it was a long time coming.

shameless promotion but if you guys want to check out my nikolai duology spotify playlist, here’s the link:

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thyandrawrites · 4 years

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Stop. Saying. That Hawks. Will die here.

I'm trying to live in denial and all of you pessimists are making it difficult, so here's a list of reasons why I think that won't happen:

1. Keigo's name literally means truthteller. Hori has made it a pattern for his names to always relate in some way to the character, and Hawks is still the only one who needs to act on the foreshadowing of his.

2. Keigo has been set up as the bridge between Enji and Dabi, and has already brought them to collision once. It makes sense from a narrative point of view, considering his own past abuse and his admiration of an unsuspecting abuser, that he will eventually learn the truth about who Dabi is and how Enji played into that.

3. If Dabi kills him, and the building crumbles, Dabi essentially said goodbye to his and Twice's only chance to get out of there alive. And Dabi still has his vendetta plot to act on so he cannot die here, either.

4. There have been multiple cases of foreshadowing that Hawks will meet Shigaraki and he hasn't yet.

5. Shigaraki and Hawks are written as foils so they need to meet each other eventually. To balance out each other. Both of them were taken in as kids by people who used them as tools, twisting their entire mindset to think of themselves and their own emotions as something that holds them back from their goals. Hawks is a character that craves genuine connection, and Shigaraki is someone who will always make a home for all the rejects and misfots that society will not accept. Hawks has been told that his individuality doesn't matter, that he should get rid of it because when he slows down people die. Shigaraki never valued his comrades for the strength of their powers, but only ever as people. And Shigaraki has been lacking a purpose, and let himself be brought forward by an indiscriminate desire for destruction, but he lacks a purpose. Hawks can give him one. Together, they can destroy the institutions and the people who victimized them both.

6. Twice is still there (if Dabi hasn't accidentally roasted him too), and Twice doesn't like internal conflict amongst his friends. He still blames himself for brining Overhoe to the lov, resulting in the loss and injury of comrades. Doing this for a second time is not a way to set up growth on Hori's part, it's overkill. If Hawks simply remains a friend turned foe until the end, Twice will keep blaming himself, and will keep persisting in his toxic mindset of having to prove that he's worth staying with the lov, that he has to pay them back. For Twice's character arc to make sense, Hawks needs not only to survive, but to turn into an asset for the lov, but this time for real. As a friend.

7. Twice and Hawks are also foils. Both of them have 0 self esteem and think that sacrificing themselves for others is what they need to do. We already know from Twice's arc in mva that this mindset is what's holding him back from finding true happiness and will eventually be corrected by the story, so since Hawks' mindset is the same, it stands to reason his will be corrected as well.

8. Hawks' wings catching fire was foreshadowed forever ago, so we all expected this to happen eventually. The Icarus symbolism and all that jazz. But you're missing a crucial point. Twice, now, it was Enji's fire burning them. One,

And two, directly in-story:

So the Icarus foreshadowing is that Enji is gonna melt his wax wings and bring about his metaphorical fall from grace. Not Dabi. It was never about dying but about reaching clarity. And you know what a bird with flaming wings is?

A phoenix. Aka a symbol for rebirth.

9. Hawks' entire character is based around the concept of self-sacrifice for the greater good. Killing him here, after he sacrificed his own future with the league for the sake of a victory for the heroes, after he literally cornered himself like a martyr, confessing his betrayal to the man he hurt the most, is like killing him in the middle of his character arc. Characters are supposed to grow and evolve and be challenged throughout a story, not be handed everything they want without any narrative losses. Having Dabi burn him and rough him up for his betrayal is narrative punishment for what he did, but narrative punishment cannot work if the character dies 5 minutes later before he can drive home that loss and grow from it.

#Bnha #Bnha meta #Bnha spoilers #Meta:hawks #My post #Bnha 265

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deantransgressions2 · 3 years

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13x02 the rising son

21 transgressions. enjoy.

#1: dean criticized sam for wanting to protect jack, and then devalued jack’s entire existence to an “it”.

sam: “look… losing mom and cas, that’s a lot to process, dean, especially on no sleep. and the kid...”

dean: “the “kid”? come on, man, you know how this plays out. kook, when we try to bend the rules, pretend that the bad guys aren’t so bad or that things will get fixed, that’s when people that we care about get hurt. and then we end up doing what we should’ve done in the first place, which is end the problem. so this time, let’s start with the obvious. soon as i find a way to take care of… it.”

time tag: 3:17

#2: after sam failed again to make dean see jack as a child, he tried to make dean see jack as an asset. dean refused to listen or consider any of sam’s insights, and admitted that he is giving up on family, which is something he claims he would never ever ever ever ever do.

sam: “dean, “the problem” might be our only shot at saving mom.”

dean: “mom’s gone. there’s no fixing that.”

time tag: 3:44

#3: jack was happily watching scooby doo and bothering nobody, so of course dean walked over and scolded him, then turned the tv off. apparently watching tv is illegal now yall!!

time tag: 9:03

#4: told jack to take the couch and threw a bible at him. luckily, sam isn’t a child murderer and made sure jack felt welcome. sam = good dad. but, dean winchester is already worse of a father than john was. you hate to see it.

time tag: 9:11

#5: dean criticized jack for eating the exact same way he does. mocking a 3 day old child just for the sake of it, just to make himself feel better. he is pathetic. idk why jack and sam put up with him these next 3 seasons.

dean: “you can slow down, you know. that’s stuff’s not gonna disappear.”

sam: “ever seen you eat, dean?”

time tag: 10:02

#6: yells at jack for copying his movements. he’s 3 days old...3 days old. 3.

time tag: 11:35

#7: sam has been rooting for jack to not be evil. he is focusing on WHO jack is not what he is. dean, however, is counting on jack being evil so he can murder him. the confirmation bias is real here. any instance of jack showing humanity dean just tunes it out. this conversation should remind you of dean’s view of sam in s4/5

donatello: “yes, well, not so much anymore. but, uh…look at you. the waves of power… so intense.”

dean: “maybe less human than we thought.”

donatello: “fascinating. you know, i’ve met your father. your power’s nothing like his. not dark, not toxic.”

sam: “that so?”

dean: “not yet.”

time tag: whole time but 15:58

#8: he was a dick to the tattoo artist for no reason expect that he loves to take his anger out on others.

time tag: 16:44

#9: when in doubt blame sam! when in doubt accuse sam! when in doubt manipulate sam! wooohooo!!!

sam: “so you heard donatello. no evil vibes from jack.”

dean: “proves nothing, except that you’re way too attached to this kid. you need to see this for what it is, okay?”

time tag: 16:54

#10: lessons from our sexist macho man icon:

jack: “it hurt.”

dean: “okay, see, sometimes, things hurt, so you just man up and deal with it.”

time tag: 17:21

#11: some more of dean refusing to listen to other’s correct observations of jack, because there is no changing his mind that jack is evil. he doesn’t need proof that jack is evil, because he doesn’t want it. he wants to murder jack regardless of who he is. dean only cares about WHAT jack is. sigh. 2x03 i miss you.

time tag: 18:43

#12: dean claimed that since cas loved jack, jack is therefore responsible for his murder. even though it was literally lucifer that murdered cas, not jack. so, using dean’s logic: sam and john killed mary, sam killed jess, dean killed john, sam killed dean, sam and dean and bobby killed jo and ellen, dean killed sam, dean and sam killed cas multiple times, sam and dean killed kevin....etc etc. do you see how fucking stupid dean is being rn?

sam: “okay, look, yeah, jack is on lucifer’s family tree. but we don’t know if that dna is stronger than Kelly’s, or his connection with cas.”

dean: “oh, you mean the connection that got cas killed?”

sam: “i’m just saying, jack doesn’t have to be evil. we can teach him not to be.”

time tag: 18:53

#13: dean called jack ‘the devil’ which made jack so upset he ran away. this is a transgression obviously towards jack, but also towards sam. dean said that a 3 day old child (who literally hasn’t done anything wrong) is the devil. he said it in front of his brother who was tortured by the ACTUAL devil (and michael) for centuries. it’s insensitive and fucked up beyond belief for dean to use his brother’s abuser to try and manipulate him to conform to his beliefs on jack.

NOT TO MENTION that dean is the only member of team free will with absolutely no supernatural abilities at all. he does not understand jack. he does not understand lucifer. dean is the LAST person who should have a say in if jack is good or evil.

time tag: 19:25

#14: this is a abuse apology. many victims of abuse are manipulated to apologize for them and sympathize with them. this is a prime example of that:

sam: “dean doesn’t hate you. it… look, sometimes the wires in dan’s head get crossed and...and he gets frustrated, and then he mixes frustration with anger, and...and fear.”

jack: “why would he be afraid?”

sam: “because dean feels like it’s his job to protect everyone.”

time tag: 20:45

#15: did the writers include this scene to emphasize that dean is john (but worse)....because that’s exactly what it did.

bartender: “i hated my old man. I ran away myself. see, my mom would never stick up for me. but…you know kids. no matter what, they still want the old man’s approval. well, that’s how it was with me, just…”

dean: “you know, that’s, uh, that’s how it was with me, too.”

i’m not sure what dean is referring to here because based on what the bartender is saying, sam would relate more to her story than dean but ok! sure! pity party time needs no logic

time tag: 22:17

#16: sam had to seperate jack and dean in order to protect jack. sam felt that jack was safer with a man that had no soul (donatello), over his own brother. and he was right!

time tag: 23:11

#17: dean made fun of sam and jack by calling jack sam’s “new pal” as a way to not only degrade jack, but also ridicule sam.

time tag: 27:08

#18: dean is angry that sam isn’t blindly following along with his plans for jack’s death. and everything sam tried to say to get dean out of his child murdering mindset goes in one ear and out the other.

sam: “point is…if you and i are gonna do this, keep jack on the right side of things, then...then we have to be on the same page.”

dean: “okay. well, that’s the problem, though, sam, ‘cause we’re not on the same page. like, at all.”

sam: “all right. you know what? i know what’s going on here.”

dean: “oh. okay. well, please, tell me, what’s going on here?”

sam: “you thinking mom is gone and cas is gone, and that jack can’t be saved. dean, after everything we’ve gone through… we just lost people we love, people who have been in our lives for a long time. everything’s upside-down. i get it. but we’ve been down before. i mean, rock bottom. and we find a way. We fix it because that’s what we do. and jack w-wants to do the right thing. jack’s scared to death of who he is, and he’s scared of you.”

you know who else was scared of their father figure? dean. and sam. and now jack. dean stans can hate john all they want but the truth is dean is far worse. they both deserve a special place in hell together

time tag: 27:19

#19: the mental gymnastics it takes to come to this conclusion about jack. to ignore any and all proof that jack isn’t evil. it’s shocking how strongly dean holds onto hate and his need to kill.

sam: “dean, wait a second. the kid came through for us today. jack saved us.” dean: “no. no, whatever that was, that was a reflex. it was a sneeze. maybe next time he sneezes, he kills us. goodnight.”

time tag: 39:32

#20: dean drove jack to self harm. dean then proceeded to angrily tell him off and call him names for doing so.

dean: “okay. what the hell? give me that. you...don’t be an idiot. look, a, this is not gonna do anything to you, okay? and b, you… what the hell?”

time tag: 40:35

#21: this is psychological abuse. this is child abuse. this scene is as bad as the panic room of s4. disgusting. and some people actually ship this man with this child’s father (castiel). get help.

dean: “you know, my brother thinks you can be saved.” jack: “you don’t believe that.” dean: “no, i don’t.”

jack: “so… if you’re right?”

dean: “if i’m right… and it comes to killing you… i’ll be the one to do it.”

time tag: 41:07

#13x02 the rising son #this episode took me like 2 hours to do oh my GOD #heavy #spn #dean negative #dean critical #jack kline #<3 #tw verbal abuse #emotional manipulation/abuse #tw self harm #pity party tag!#controlling #gaslighting #hypocrisy #sexism #belittling #anti dean winchester

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thisdreamplace · 3 years

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i would like to know your opinion on the eiypo. specifically when it comes to people being abusive, or racist, etc. i see a lot of times some coaches will blame people who naturally are the victims of that & that they created that. personally it bugs me. or say you live in a toxic household, i see how the reflection could be you giving your anger away, but what if you stay calm, & just don’t allow people to affect you? of course the others are still acting those toxic ways, but if you say you’re a victim of that stuff, would you consider that the victimizing that people use when you want someone to act the way you want them too? through manifestation. like i see people say things like abusive people are only that way because you assume it. i understand the whole concept of attracting partners who are abusive cuz u feel you deserve that, & that is something that a person can change so they can attract better & not settle. but what about children? like a child who went through that, couldn’t it just be cuz they were young, it’s not there fault. but growing older they need to take responsibility on there own needs, & surround themselves with more positive people or people that they vibe with better? i hope this made sense, it’s something on my mind, & i’d like to know ur opinion if that’s okay:)

Everyone is you pushed out is really a sensitive concept for reasons such as you explained. It can be heavy. So I will try my best to explain it all.

So right off that bat, eiypo is not a blame game. It's not a "this is all your fault" type of approach. I think people who greatly misunderstand the law often see it that way, and it puts them off. But no, that is a huge misunderstanding. As within, so without. That's all it means. When you speak of "creation" in this way, you're doing so from a egotistical lens. You have to understand manifestation isn't special. It's natural and automatic. Most of the population isn't consciously creating their reality, it's happening automatically based off of their conception of self. So, no one is creating harmful scenarios through choice. It's happening automatically, based of their foundation which I'll explain more later. I think that's important to understand.

Another thing I want to say is you're seeing eiypo through a very law of attraction based understanding. And honestly, the law of attraction and eiypo don't really mix well, for the very reasons you're confused about. You talk about people being victims when they're choosing to be calm but still having to deal with abusive behavior. The mirror of life isn't surface level. The 3D isn't reflecting your actions, it's reflecting your core concept of self. Your core beliefs that live within you. So it doesn't matter if you're nice, quiet, and calm on the surface. If you think people can be abusive and you feel insecure or unsafe on a deeper level, well you may end up experiencing that type of undesirable circumstance. Did this person ask to experience that? No. This isn't about victim blaming and keeping that mindset isn't helpful for anyone. However, the 3D can only show you what lives within you. That's the way the mirror works.

And then you talk about people attracting certain types of people. Once again, that's a misunderstanding of eiypo and it's sounding very law of attraction based. You're not attracting any type of person. It all goes back to life being a mirror. When you hear someone say that "people show up how you assume so" it's a literal statement. So, the truth is, no one is this horrible type of person. Everyone, at their core, is love. What happens is, based off your self concept, you may manifest an unlovely version of a person. Is this person showing up abusive because that's just who they are? Nope. They're showing up that way because on some level, you assume that type of person exists and you believe that's a possibility for you to experience. The difference between what I'm saying and what you're saying is that, if you wanted that person to fully change, they would. If you went within yourself and decided "no, I am worthy. I only experience lovely versions of people. I am deserving, the people around me treat me with respect, etc etc etc" That person you once called abusive would change with you. They would become lovelier, nice, more caring, and respectful. They have no choice but to mirror your inner world. Because the more you choose love, the more you allow the illusion of fear based experiences to dissolve and you allow love to shine through. Because that's the real meaning of everyone is you pushed out. It's not a "you attract what you are." Instead, you experience what you are, within.

It's not about manipulation. You don't need to say a word to anyone. You change yourself within, a real change. And you know that since eiypo and this world is a mirror, everyone and everything in it has to reflect this change. It's a lot more deeper than just attracting certain types of people and that mindset allows you to keep avoiding full responsibility. You're not going to run from undesirable people, if you're choosing to keep believing undesirable people exist. You're always going to be met by who you are, as this world is a mirror. So why do that? Choose to believe in lovely things for yourself and for everyone.

When it comes to children, once again, it's not a blame game. Especially when it comes to children. How can anyone even think a child is choosing to manifest something undesirable? That's so weird to me. Most people don't even know the depths of manifesting, let alone a child knowing it. As a child, you're simply more subject to what is happening around you. Of course, no child knows any better. Through our childhood experiences, we begin to build our self concept which leads to the world we manifest automatically. That's all. Jen from I Am Love says that, when our Godself decided to come to this life, we already agreed to go through everything we experience. So therefore, once again, no one is at fault. It's not a blame game. We are put into these experiences at birth and eventually, the point is that we are meant to remember who we really are. We start dissolving all these illusions we thought were real and begin taking back our power. We dissolve this illusion of reality.

So to be clear, no one is purposefully choosing anything. Even we are ourselves pushed out. What happens is that, on a certain level, people believe bad things can happen and bad people exist. In that way, we become open to undesirable experiences. It can be that unspecific. It's not about seeking out more positive people that you vibe with. It's about understanding none of that is real anyway, behind every unlovely circumstance is love, and it's up to us to allow those unlovely illusions to dissolve. We do this by remembering who we truly are, God of our reality. Everyone is you pushed out, means ultimately, there is no separation between us and others. We are all one and connected. This is why people mirror us at all. Because ultimately, they are us.

So further, there's not even a point in wondering about other people and what they're manifesting or how. Because this world is a mirror of you anyway. You're going to be stuck in a trap of assuming and wondering about others, and you're never going to get a concise answer because it's all just mirroring you anyway. So focus on your own world. Focus on lifting yourself up and lifting up everyone around you. Make your world heaven on earth, because you have that ability. Rather than continuing to perpetuate undesirable experiences because you think people are separate from you. They aren't.

I hope this clarifies things for you and helps deepen your understanding of what eiypo really actually is. 💖

#eiypo

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craniumdemon · 3 years

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My mind is a very odd place right now. I'm in such a great position as far as moving on with my life is concerned even with the way that the world is falling apart around me. I've been able to make friends and move on in many ways.

That girl that I fell in love with about 4 years ago has just informed me that she's having a child with her husband. I'm totally conflicted on this but not for the reasons of being a former lover. I've had to admit that she has borderline personality disorder. I've pushed her as far as I could from such a distance away to promote a healthy mindset for her which I know only went so far. When she stopped hyperfixating on me she went downhill. She's got the last stage of all of the things that she's ever wanted. I know she's lied to me a lot. I've called her out for it many times as well and I've gotten to the point of acceptance but this is the person that she is. But this horrible thought is popped into my head that she never really cared for me in the first place and then I was nothing more then a means ticket to fix.

First and foremost please understand that I'm never blaming you for this. I don't think you're ever going to read this I know that most of the people that we had as mutual's have either stopped following me because I wasn't keeping up with the status quo of keeping my Victim Points. I also would call people out knowing that they were doing things that were wrong and only putting half of the information for their situation online to be able to play up and justify their actions. There's literally only one person who follows me on here that we were friends with four years ago.

I fear that you never loved me. I think that's the part that cuts the deepest for me. It's not like I stopped caring for you and it's not like I think I ever will because I know you in ways that none of your friends ever well. But I also know and I've come to grips with the fact that there are ways I will never know you because I've never gotten to see you in person. We would Skype for hours at a time for 5 or 6 days a week. We would talk about our hopes and our dreams. Your husband was ignoring you to the point where you could send me selfies with him in the background or do NSFW actions that you would either record or do you on Skype literally at arm's length away from him. I was in such a horrible place with my abusive wife but I didn't pay attention to any of the red flags that you gave off. I'm not blaming you please understand that. We both had been in a dark place.

You were able to get the house, the car the cats the husband and now soon the child. The thing that I fear the most for you is the idea if you're doing all of these things just a scratch that itch. I can't explain to you how or how much I care for you. I can't explain how it feels to look at your face and see the ghost of a woman that I fell for after 6 months of talking with almost everyday on Tumblr or Skype. It didn't happen right away I wasn't for lust. And then we had another year to year-and-a-half of a massive fire a flame between the two of us only to have your husband catch you finally. He blamed it on the guys that I didn't I want you to screw around with for experiment sexually with. I wanted you to tell him the truth but I've come to realize you could never really do that. Whether or not he actually was hinting that he would kill himself if you left.

At this point none of it matters, you're impulsive actions have chosen your life and the only thing that I can do is hope for the best. I fell in love with a woman who I am starting to feel truly never existed.

To be completely honest I do have to put in something that I have to smirk about. A bit of my dark humor because if it wasn't for the stupid pandemic I would have come to visit you. I would have hidden in a hotel room nearby your home and you would have come to visit me when your husband would be gone. The part that makes me chuckle and give off a little smile is knowing that you're asexual and that you hardly ever have a sex drive. The time frame that I expected to come visit you was around the time that you conceived. So if this pandemic didn't exist, I would have visited you and there could be a very good chance I could be having my kid and not his.

We would of had an international love child. I would be stuck with somebody compulsively does whatever they want and then progressed those actions only to do a lot of self-harm and I'd be raising one of two of my children alone.

Let's be honest though I've never been able to stop you from harming yourself. I can do the, "what if" but it's not like that's actually going to do anything. The fact that the one time I did try to get a hold of one of your friends and they told me that's just how you are and then I would have to learn to accept it and they even said that it was perfectly fine that you did physical self harm has made me realize that you don't always surround yourself with good people.

So now I have the great debate. Do I stay your friend? I know things about you that not even your primary school friends know. I don't say this in a threatening manner. I say this more because there's going to be a time where do you fall into darkness again and I can't help you. I told you that I knew that you were pregnant before you told me, I knew about the times that you cheated on me and could actually tell you word for word what you did with the other individual. I knew that when you were talking with somebody but it wasn't a good person and that you were giving in to desires that you regret later on. Hell I remember contacting you to ask if you're okay because you were fighting with your husband and I could sense it. I can't have that kind of a connection with you anymore and I know for the most part it's gone. ( I say this but I've known you're pregnant for probably about two months. It's actually in my stories that I've written in Archive of Our Own where the Dutch woman is working and having a kid)

So what do I do? I have to try to figure this out but the only thing that I can hope is that your car got a good life for yourself even though it's not with me. I'm so proud that you've been able to get your feet up. I guarantee I would have kicked your ass into a higher gear to get things done. But that's more because I live up to certain traits that I knew that you fell in love with.

In closing, I love you that won't stop. It's changed and it's not a bad thing but remember, you need to take care of yourself.

Your's always,

Your living version of Danse

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buzzdixonwriter · 3 years

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TROTS AND BONNIE Review

Trigger Warning: This will review a work that often addresses human sexuality, emotional / physical / sexual abuse, and adolescents’ views on same. Be advised.

. . .

When I was growing up in the 1950s and early 1960s, two old comic strips that remained popular were J. R. Williams’ Out Our Way and Gene Ahern’s Our Boarding House, both started in the 1920s and, from their daily panels and Sunday pages, never moving out of that decade. My favorite cartoons on local kid shows were Fleischer Brothers Betty Boop and Popeye cartoons, many of which took place in urban / suburban settings heavily reflective of 1920s and 1930s America.

So when I first encountered Shary Flenniken’s Trots And Bonnie I instantly recognized the flavor and style of the strips.

The content, on the other hand, came straight out of her underground comix pedigree, with the refreshing point of view of the female gaze instead of the admittedly too often misogynistic male cartoonists of the milieu.

Flenniken is one of the best artists and writers to come from the underground era, displaying a confident early mastery of the form (don’t listen to her protestations she really wasn’t good at the start of her career; she clearly ranked among the finest of the underground comix artists).

But the sweet and innocent look of Trots And Bonnie belies the frank and frequently shocking honesty of Flenniken’s work.

As cartoonist Emily Flake notes in her introduction, “that’s the terrible power of children, the monstrous innocence that makes them capable of anything, a state of being we fatuously describe as ‘pure.’”

Innocence is not synonymous with purity in the world of Trots And Bonnie because the cast lack the moral and cultural filters we acquire as adults. They are reporting on reality as they see it, and as with all children (and the elderly, and drunks) there’s nothing to stop them from commenting on the foibles of hypocrisy of humanity, nor is there a single iota of shame to hold back their expression.

And when you add the impact of puberty to that mix, holy &#@%, you have no room left for pretense or propriety.

Hold on to your hats, folks, ‘cuz it’s gonna be one helluva ride.

One helluva ride…and a hilarious one, too.

If modern audiences can get past the admittedly often shocking visuals and situations, they’ll find some of the most brilliant coming-of-age comedy ever penned.

The truth is always an absolute defense, and Trots And Bonnie dishes it out lavishly. Brava to Shary Flenniken for having the courage (or honesty, of lack of filter; take your pick) to pen it, to the original underground comix and National Lampoon to publish it, and to new York Review Comics to bring almost all of it back (Flenniken herself opted to withhold a few strips that she feels might be construed now as hurtful or insulting).

Flenniken is the daughter of a military family, growing up in a variety of climes and places before her father retired in the Seattle area.

She reached adolescence and young adulthood during the hippie era, and the earliest strips cast a fond eye back on that time.

An original member of the infamous Air Pirates crew, she and fellow underground comix artists gained immediate recognition skewering Disney icons. Air Pirates Funnies and Paul Kassner’s The Realist generated no small amount of tsuris for the House of Mouse in the late 1960s / early 1970s but The Realist, true to its name, possessed to good sense to adhere to the unofficial so-called “one-time fair use parody” rule while the Air Pirates pressed their luck with Air Pirates Funnies #2, resulting in the Disney legal department descending on them like an anvil dropped from orbit.

Crawling away from the wreckage, Flenniken kept contributing to a number of underground venues, creating the first Trots and Bonnie strip for the 1971 underground comix Merton Of The Movement.

Trots and Bonnie (soon joined by Pepsi, a beguilingly sweet looking elfin-like child with the heart of Germaine Greer, the reproductive organs of Karen Finley, and the mouth of an interstate trucker) popped up in several single page strips and short stories until NatLamp recruited Flenniken in 1972 to be a regular contributor and (briefly) an editor.

NatLamp proved to be the perfect venue for Flenniken and her characters because the magazine possessed the economic mojo and suicidal “Who gives a &#@%?” attitude to publish Trots And Bonnie while at the same time providing a perfect audience of proto-incels who desperately needed some consciousness raising, especially if said consciousness raising arrived in the form of a kick in the groin.

Trots And Bonnie’s tenure at NatLamp lasted slightly more than two decades, but a big hunk of that era saw the Reagan culture wars raging, not to mention much of the country becoming obsessed with a literal modern day witch hunt in the infamous Satanic panic (an apt subject for Flenniken’s characters, but one she wisely avoided, thus following the old military adage, “Never draw fire on your own position.”).

The already edgy material in both NatLamp in general and Trots And Bonnie in particular threatened to be perceived as too edgy by law enforcement, legislators, and judicial authorities who seemed either unwilling or incapable of distinguishing between photographs and video of actual sexual assaults and rapes committed against real children as opposed to crudely drawn Xerox copied mini-comics made by outsider artists with audiences that might possibly number in the dozens.

Flenniken’s willingness to honestly recall the turbulent emotions of early adolescence resulted in stories and strips where prepubescent kids engage in activities and discussions that would be acutely problematic if done today. Again, the utter lack of self-consciousness in Flenniken’s characters swerves her work away from the low grade smut ground out by many of her male contemporaries and flung open a window on how adolescent females perceived the world around them.

The stories are wildly transgressive, and like all transgressive art can only be understood in the context of their time and mores. Flenniken’s art carries a sweetness that leavens out the most horrendous situations (she gets astonishing comedic mileage off a story about a woman raped by a police officer, never once blaming or exploiting the victim but lambasting the culture and mindset that makes such a crime possible).

The fact these stories are told from a vibrant feminist / sex positive point of view makes them relevant to this day, and Flenniken’s ability to draw both truth and humor from dysfunctional families, emotional abuse, and drug use keeps them from being one-note exercises.

Most importantly, Flenniken comes across as strongly pro-child, even while honestly depicting her own characters’ failings and misconceptions.

She always brings a genuine emotional connection with her characters as adolescents, neither glorifying nor patronizing them.

One of the most notorious Trots And Bonnie strips finds Bonnie looking at herself in a mirror, fantasizing she’s famous actresses of the past.*

At the hands and brush of Norman Rockwell, this theme tries for poignant but lands in schmaltz, looking down on an anxious child studying her reflection in a mirror; in far too many bad novels by sub-par male writers, it’s borderline (and often not-so-borderline) pornography.

At the touch of Flenniken’s deft pen, it’s honest and sweet and shockingly frank but it never depicts Bonnie as a figment of the male imagination but as a character and personality all her own.

Flenniken has not done any new Trots And Bonnie strips since the last ones published in NatLamp in 1993.

To be honest, I think that’s a good thing.

The characters are of their particular time and cultural gestalt, it may not be possible to recapture that lightning in a new bottle, and rather than diminish the old, perhaps it best remains a perfect artefact of its era.

Mark Twain tried repeatedly but could never transport Tom Sawyer and Huck Finn out of antebellum Hannibal, and to use an example more contemporary to Flenniken’s work, the Fabulous Furry Freak Brothers resolutely thwart all efforts to move them out of San Francisco during the Summer of Love.

You can’t go home again, as Thomas Wolfe famously observed, but that only applies if you’ve successfully left home. At a certain point, if you haven’t moved beyond your old confines, you never will.

Flenniken’s honest frankness could have turned into a big crosshair on her back during the cultural wars, but to paraphrase John Lennon, life happened while she was making comix.

She married twice, divorced once, widowed the second time. While she never completely withdrew from professional illustration, she no longer sought out the high profile gigs.

Trots And Bonnie from New York Review Comics is the first extensive English language compilation of her strips and stories, a very handsomely produced volume designed by Norman Hathaway.

The strips are meticulously presented, making it possible to enjoy Flenniken’s fine line work and exquisite character depictions in greater detail than every before. It’s a genuine delight, sure to thrill old time fans of the original strip and quite likely to win a new generation of admirers.

But brace yourselves, noobs, this ain’t your grandma’s Betty Boop…

* It should be noted that for all its apparent revolutionary newness, the counterculture of the 1960s and 1970s, the crucible that forged Flenniken’s point of view, also enthusiastically embraced the past. W. C. Fields and the Marx Brothers became cultural icons to a new generation, Betty Boop regained her old popularity, old movies were rediscovered and reimagined, African-American spirituals and blues sprang from new voices, obscure books and novels from earlier decades and centuries became the new cultural touchstones.

I’ve posted elsewhere on how the boomer generation enjoyed a unique conflation of new technology and old media to produce a brand new synthesis; there has been nothing like it since even with astonishing advances in technology. When old media is rediscovered and reinterpreted in this era, it too often tends to be in the form of irony, which mocks that which it cannot understand.

Give those old hippies their due -- they got the &#@%ing point!

#Shary Flenniken #Trots And Bonnie #New York Review Comics #comics #underground comix #Air Pirates #National Lampoon #NatLamp #cartooning #counterculture #hippies #1960s #1970s

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linkspooky · 4 years

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Akaza and Doma - BFFS

Akaza and Doma are the only two of the upper moons with any kind of relatoinship to each other, namely in how much Akaza despises Doma, and how despite that Doma pretends to be his friend. For both of them it’s more like a hollow imitation of a connection than any genuine feelings between them. That being said, despite the fact they have no true feelings for one another the characters are heavily connected in story. They may not be best friends forever, but they are best foils forever. The reason Doma and Akaza could never get along is because they both believe the same thing, that there is nothing enjoyable about life and no meaning in continuing to live. The difference is Akaza had the love that made his life meaningful and lost it, whereas Doma never had any to begin with and has no idea those feelings even exist.

Which is why despite the fact that they do not get along, the two of them complement each other. They were made for each other in fact. Made to reflect each other. LET’S TAKE A LOOK UNDER THE CUT.

1. Akaza Lost Everything

Both Doma and Akaza believe that their lives are primarily meaningless. However, they come to this conclusion through completely opposite paths. They both live empty lives, but Akaza attempts to fill that emptiness with pursuing strength whereas Doma just embraces that emptiness. Which is why Akaza needs to reject Doma, because he is a reminder of the emptiness Akaza is constantly running away from.

We see this in Akaza’s introduction and his fight with Rengoku. He is absolutely baffled why Rengoku would choose to die, when he could live forever and become stronger. Akaza believes when someone dies, something is lost that cannot be replaecd. For him life is meaningless because it is fleeting, but once again as I will get to later this comes from Akaza’s feelings after having lost everything. Even his own memories of what he lost are gone at the moment.

Akaza is someone who cannot appreciate the beauty of life the same way Rengoku can, because he is unable to live with the losses. Akaza’s idea of strength is basically a child’s idea, being so strong you never lose and die, being so absolute in your strength that nobody can take anything with you. However as Rengoku says that’s not true strength. What Akaza has is a tremendous weakness and cowardice, because he is so afraid of losing things he cannot go on. Unlike the people who are individually crawling out of the wrekcage of the train but still trying to survive, no matter how physically strong he is he lacks the will to try and live with the losses like those people.

Akaza’s vew of the world itself is rather black and white. Remember, he is essentially a stunted child who lost everything when he was on the precipice of growing up, and then was taken advantage of and forced to stay immortally in that state forever. His mind has stagnated for years so it makes sense that he cannot be at the same level of maturity that Rengoku is.

Akaza’s view of the world is so simple, the strong ones, and the chosen ones are the ones who find happiness. Those who are not strong, or chosen, will lose everything.

Therefore it’s impossible for someone to attain happiness if they are weak. Once again, Akaza’s ideas are centered around the fact that if he personally was strong enough he would never lose anything, and also the pre-supposed idea that he should have been strong enough to protect what he had before. This is a mindset that does not allow himself to cope with the loss in any way. There’s no healing, there’s no forgiving himself for not being strong enough, all he can do is continue to lose.

The pursuit of strength that drives him is ultimately empty. He has long forgotten why he wants to be stronger. He lost his reasons the moment he lost everybody he wanted to protect, but beyond that it’s because Akaza could never accept those losses in the first place. Because he sees everything as coming down to strength in the end, he cannot accept that sometimes bad things happen. There are some situations where you cannot help but lose things no matter how strong you are. However, Akaza clings to the idea of his own strength because he has nothing left. He wants to fight, because otherwise he would be a weak man who has lost everything, prolonging a life he does not even want to live anymore.

Akaza takes far too much personal responsibility for everything. Even though he’s a child just trying to survive in a cruel system, he blames his fathers illness, and his inability to help his own father on himself. If only he were stronger, than he would not be suffering this way, that is the narrative Akaza has clung to his entire life.

Akaza also has a pattern where he continually wants to suffer to protect the people that he loves, but he does not understand at all that the people who love him would never wish this pain on him. As it’s shown in the flashback, Akaza’s father told his son to live, but Akaza himself doesn’t understand his father’s wishes and says he would have endured any kind of beating for his father’s sake.

Genuinely in his heart, all Akaza wants to do is live for the people that he loves. At the same time he cannot do that, because the people he loves also love him in return and would never wish to see him suffer in that way.

It’s important to remember Akaza had almost no agency from a young age. That he was continually forced to deal with being poor, having absolutely no secure household, being homeless, basically no control over his own life at all adn always being at the mercy of adults. The reason Akaza cannot stand the feelings of weakness is because he’s been made to feel weak his entire life.The reason he wants strength is he wants the security he does not have.

The difference between Akaza and Doma is that Akaza was shown the love Doma never even received, and was given a chance to heal. In a way though that made him worse, because after coming back from losing everything he was forced to endure losing everything again. Which is why they both came to the same conclusion, that their life is worthless and empty. That they meant nothing in the end.

Akaza lost everything in a situation out of his control, so he took that to mean if he had strength he would have the agency that was taken from him as well. However once again, they were killed in a poisoning incident, not a fist fight. What Akaza cannot stand is that he will one day lose people. The idea of losing people makes any kind of connection he tries to form meaningless, and he thinks the promises he made those people were all lies.

Which is another common point between Akaza and Doma. Despite the fact that they find their lives to be empty and don’t want to live, they keep on prolonging their lives, and it only makes the wounds in them worse and fester. Because they themselves cannot accept what is lost within them, what they are missing.

When Akaza says he hates weak people, he comes to the realization what he hated was his own weak self who could never do anything for the people he loved. That he could not go on living without them, or try to follow the words they left behind. He believes everything he did in life was a waste, and he broke all the promises he made to other people.

However to the people who loved him in his life, Akaza’s own promises were not meaningless. The love he had for them did not go to waste. They accept him, even after he became a demon, even after he died. There love for him did not go away. It’s not gone, even if it’s lost.

That acceptance of his loss, instead of continually trying to fight against himself to prove that he’s not weak is what finally allows Akaza to return to his old self. What gives him the love he so desperately needs is not a show of strength, but rather a show of weakness which is where his true feelings reside.

Which is again, yet another similarity between Doma and Akaza. They both act very childish, proud, and arrogant on the surface but they themselves despite all of their flashiness are weak, damaged people who live their entire lives trying to cover up and deny this weakness.

However they are opposites in their ends, as Akaza always had a home to go back to, whereas Doma never had those things in the first place and never acquired them in life.

2. Doma has Nothing

Specifically what seems to bother Akaza about Doma’s behavior is how he pretends to care about other people. Especially since Akaza himself is driven deep down at heart, by how much he cares about and wants to love and be loved in return by the people in his life. The genuine connections he made to people and how deep his feelings, and also his wounds run have always been Akaza’s strongest trait. It’s because he cared so much about others, that the loss of them was like losing a part of himself, his eyes, or his heart, or one of his limbs. It’s a wound he can never heal from, only let it rot forever.

Which is why Doma pretending to care about other people would be such an affront to him. Doma just plays around with the emotions that drive Akaza the most.

However, Doma and Akaza’s ideologies when they are the demon slayers are almost identical. They both believe that because death exists, because suffering in life exists and loss ther is no meaning in life. However, Akaza came to feel that way after he was dehumanized in his life over and over again. Whereas, Doma never had those connections from the start. Never in his life was he treated as a human.

I don’t think people take seriously what a dehumanizing environment being raised in a cult is. Despite the fact that Akaza was smart enough to realize that his parents were using him, he was still an abuse victim that was taken advantage of by his parents. He was still a child who was used over and over again. The reason Doma feels no genuine feelings is because he’s had several adults since he was born, always place their worries on a mere child.

Doma literally even says that he constantly had other people’s emotions dumped on him when he was a kid. People don’t realize how formative the development of children is, you cannot learn to develop healthy emotions of your own if your emotions are not treated as valid by the adults around you in your life. Doma is not a born sociopath, he’s stunted emotionally and egocentric like a child. The exact same way that Akaza clings to his childish belief that if he was stronger all the misery in the world would go away, Doma clings to the belief that none of the misery in the world matters because everybody is going to end up dead in the end. This is once again, both of them trying to cope with a reality that foisted everything upon them and denied them continually any humanity at all when they were both children.

Akaza and Doma both became demons as a result of nobody in their life treating them as a human, or if they did in Akaza’s case he lost those people. They were continually dehumanized by the environment around them.

Doma knows his parents are using him, but he still clearly is reacting to being raised in that environment. Despite the fact that he does not believe in the cult, his entire life is centered around the cult because there is really nothing else for him. He was shown no other way of living, just used by selfish parents and abandoned.

It’s not that he has those feelings, it’s that Doma has never been shown anything genuine. ANd by the time he was an adult he stopped looking for the genuine thing believing it no longer existed. What Doma wants is what everyone else has, and the same thing Akaza wanted. They both wanted to live in this world to connect, to have something that made their lives feel less empty.

Neither of them want to be demons at all. They want to be human, they want to feel what everyone else has. However, Doma was constantly dehumanized by his own parents, and raised in a dehumanizing cult and Akaza lived in a world that dehumanized the poor and crimminals for just trying to survive.

Doma believing that the bonds between other people have no meaning at all, is a response to that. He wants to feel what everybody else does, but he cannot. Therefore, he chooses to believe that the feelings of other people are empty because the alternative is admitting that he is empty and lived his life for nothing. The same as Akaza, who believved that other people besides him were weak because he did not want to admit his own weakness.

What they both want is a child’s view of the world. Doma wants a world where nobody is suffering and nobody feels pain, and believes that only the emptiness of death absolves these things. Akaza wants a world where he is so strong he never has to endure any loss at all. However, what both of them are unable to do is simply keep on living as people. They are unable to live as people in a world with loss, in a world that is frigid and sometimes lonely, and so they choose to live on as demons instead.

When Doma accuses other people of never having a happy moment in their lives, he’s really just talking about himself.

What Doma is doing here is playing the part of a fictional villain. He’s responding to an irrational world by using a narrative. If he is a villain, if he’s an evil monster in a story book then he’s no longer a person. He doesn’t have to feel like he’s inferior to everyone else, that he’s missing something.

Doma’s death is even sadder beacuse we learn that both of his parents were only in his life to take advantage of him, and exitting his life he could not feel anything for the two people who did not love him in the first place. Doma doesn’t feel sad or lonely, because he was never shown the opposite in the first place, there was never a point where he felt happy, when he was accepted by someone.

Doma points out that he could try to keep living, but unlike Akaza who accepted his death Doma just sort of doesn’t care enough about being alive to even try. It’s not the afterlife for Doma that’s empty, it’s life itself.

Unlike Akaza he had no home. For him, nothing was gained and nothing was lost. However his last request even to Shinobu shows that what him and Akaza wanted was the same thing all along. Just one single connection, proof that they were alive, that they mattered to someone. They both wanted to become human again through the connections they had with other people.

#akaza #doma #kimetsu no yaiba #kny meta #kimetsu no yaiba meta #upper moon #upper moon demons #kimetsu no yaiba theory #kimetsu no yaiba analysis #meta

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kehideni · 3 years

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I think it’s time i rant why i ship the Commander with Caithe.

And not specifically MY commander, but the general commander character. (which is why i don’t care that my Commander happens to be male)

I don’t even know where to start... i guess for clarifications:

I personally don’t feel either way for Caithe. I guess i like her but she wouldn’t be on my top 10-20 favourit character list.

When i first played Guild Wars 2(yes my main character is my first ever character) i played through with the mindset that i am this charr and i will make the choices that i think will save the most lives(lel.... later on i learned it didn’t matter). So when i plowed through the personal story of the Commander i was in the mindset of “I AM A CHARR!!! AND IN THIS WORLD OF CONSTANT BATTLE I AM THE DEADLIEST WEAPON OF ALL!” (also mild Denalien influence but Denalien is intertvined with my being so... let’s not go into that)

I LOVED that Rytlock was badass and unflinching and angry i guess in simpler way: Charr = GW2′s version of orks(WoW) which means Rytlock = Thrall but actually badass.

By pure coincidence i made the choices that made me meet with mainly charr characters and it made me believe it’s because i chose charr that i meet charr. Later on i learned that... no... i just chose the paths that made me meet charr.

Queue in the story instances from 10 to 80, and past-kehideni notices a pattern. Rytlock is not the one that your character connects to the most.

I know, the letters you get are all from Rytlock when you are a charr, but the one other person Arenanet pushes your Commander to connect with is- you guessed it- Caithe.

Twilight Arbor- now you would argue Rytlock Logan and Caithe but Rytlock leaves before you start fighting any nightmare court and Logan after just a bunch of spiders. Canonically, it’s just the Commander and Caithe. Nothing actually that i’d noticed when playing through because the Commander only asks questions from Caithe that i’d want to know anyway. However this instance literally has established a connection between the two that later on gets referenced in a throwaway speechline with someone you’ll be surprised by. We’ll get to that.

Sorrow’s Embrace- Eir, Zojja and Caithe: the Commander asks Caithe for information (of course, who else. Not like they can ask Zojja at that moment, but these are all just starting off things)

Honor of the Waves- Eir and Caithe: the Commander tells Caithe to shut up and let Eir come to the right conclusion herself which makes me laugh to this day xD (This is where my personal meme comes from “Shut up, Kyle Caithe!”)

Ruined city of Arah- the Commander sasses Caithe. Basically in the story instances the Commander and Caithe work towards the same goal, to reunite Destiny’s Edge.

Things happen in the between though: There is this quest where Trahearne and the Commander enter a vision of the Pale Tree. In there, the Pale Tree tells the Commander that they MUST reunite Destiny’s Edge and this is where Twilight Arbor greets back a bit.

When you walk past the members you hear them talk to each other, blame each other.

Caithe however stands out because she isn’t talking with one of her friends, she talks to Faolain. The crazy part is that in this vision you are not supposed to AND can’t talk to any vision-npc.... that is except for Faolain herself. But let’s see what happened beforehand:

Narratively speaking when a character says they are alone and tired, it’s supposed to elicit protectiveness from the viewer and/or empathy.

“So here i am a bulky a** charr, why is her love life any of my buisness?” - very emotional quote from kehideni of the past

Aaaaaha... sure whatever you say Trahearne, but wait.. because here comes the kicker. The ACTUAL kicker where past-kehideni went

“Wait jus- hold on just a minute here...”

Faolain that was awfully possessive of you, i’m a big a** charr. What competition would i be in this future-vision to you? And then the Commander says “I won’t let Caithe fall into nightmare.”

A little bit of extra:

“Pft... whatever... you’re just her ex.” says the Commander. :v

In Arah Caithe thanks you for saving Destiny’s Edge (also interestingly she is the chosen companion npc as she’s the one that resses you if you get downed) and at the end of the fight she says that all of Tyria is in the Commander’s debt. Ok ... casual stuff. She’s been thanking the Commander left and right that day. As if she didn’t drive home the fact that she’s grateful she thanks the Commander once again at the end party and also is the one to suggest the Commander should go after the rest of the Elder Dragons too.

The next you meet her is the Aetherblade path in Twilight Arbor, the narrative distances Caithe from the Commander. By this time canonically they are friends, duh. So it’s like a friend has a side the Comm didn’t know so far. Nothing interesting yet, let’s hurry on.

She attends the summit, of course she does. You can’t talk with her.

In Echoes of the Past Comm saves her, their talk is still friendly but distanced. I do want to note that Canach and Caithe are so similar in attitude xD

Tangled Paths: Comm goes up to her to talk and she says “don’t mind me” and proceeds to follow you around and friendly-mocks you as “boss”. We know NOW why, but not back then. This is important because not long before this i realised that the Comm can’t possibly be me. It’s MassEffect’s case of Commander Shepard. You controll them but they are their own character and your choices have only slight weight in the story because the Commanders’ choices are already set in stone by the actual writers. What you CAN do is write the WHY parts, and this is soon the part where my writing interferes with actual canon but you’ll see my reasonings.

When the Comm talks with Caithe she’s the most civil with them among their allies. (We later learn it was to keep the Comm. in the dark.)

The beauty of this scene is that Caithe WILL learn why a mother can’t keep their eyes off of their children.

“Is that a problem?” “Not for me.” Still can take this line as civil but kinda funny line in hindsight. (Get it? Because it will be a problem for them.)

So Caithe’s betrayal happens, and the Comm is FURIOUS!

Lol my charr is too tall, but the shot was meant to place the Comm face to face with Caithe because in the next shot she looks them in the eye and goes for the egg.

When Marjory notes that Caithe is a Sylvari the Comm goes defensive “So? What are you trying to say?” Their friend would never do that- is what narratively they want to convey, but later on in HoT the Comm reacts so harshly to her betrayal i took the wheel a bit.

I mean let’s add up what the Comm knows: Mordremoth created the sylvari, he has mental access to them, he can mind controll them, fool them if they are too strongwilled to do his bidding. Caithe is a sylvari with a strong will. If she betrayed them it’s not of her free mind. It’s like the victim-blaming when a girl gets drugged and they take her body to do as they please. Try as she might she wasn’t clear in the head but she made it clear later on that she didn’t want to betray the Comm. Why would she after all she can be thankful for to the Comm?

So what gives? Well in my mind, the only way to rectify Anet’s nonsense writing(they should really stop reading GW2 reddit forums, not a good place to be influenced with) is to give the Comm a reason to take it to heart a bit too much, say... if they were harboring feelings for her. In my mind it adds up.

So HoT happens, and Caudecus is making his move.

Where next you meet Caithe: Out of the Shadows. (fitting title for her, huh?)

I’m just gonna link the video with timestamp, that whole part is reconciling:

https://youtu.be/AABguDwhieE?t=2612

At this point the writing of GW2 seems to take a chillpill so i go with the flow. The Comm realising that he overreacted inspects himself: Why? This is the part the Comm realises that “oh sheet, they got them feels.”

Aurene hatches, Caithe is there.

The first time the Comm is voiced in LW and he jokes around with a character it’s with Caithe.

Comm: “I’d feel better if someone i knew was watching the chamber.”

Caithe fishing for the one line that would reassure her that the Comm talking with her actually means that they are ok with her now: “Someone you trust?”

Comm: “Yeah, so... could you ask Taimi to get her right away?”

Caithe relieved her relationship with Comm is safe: “You’re joking with me, i take that as a good sign.” They talk around a bit more, they are healing and that’s adorable.

Later on she thanks the Comm for letting her prove herself to them by looking out for Aurene.

Path of Fire happens, she’s like throwaway-ly mentioned by Taimi.

I was all, “Well, goodbye Caithe you got Zojja’d, it was a good headcannon while it lasted” but THENNNNNNN ARENANET THROWS ME THIS

Like... are you fkin’ kidding me. This line alone means that she’s been stalking the Commander IN STEALTH ATLEAST since they met Zafirah in Sun’s Refuge!!! THE BARE MINIMUM SHE SAW FROM STEALTH WAS THE COMM GOING IN ON A SUICIDE MISSION, HOW ABOUT SOME HELP YOU CONNIVING VEGETAB- sorry... my personal annoyance at her came out.

Back to story, after this All or Nothing happens where the Comm and Caithe are confirmed parents of Aurene. When Aurene branded Caithe only the Comm asked if she was still herself, not even Rytlock nor Logan, the actual two people who know her longest. The Comm and Caithe are constantly paralleled next to Aurene as her “champions” because dragons apparently don’t have parental bonds*sarcasm* :V

Requiem happens and Rytlock himself says he sees it now. Coincidentally as of writing this he is going through the very same trauma Caithe and Comm went through when Aurene died.

Caithe calls for Comm to return to her because she needs them, and the Comm tells everyone they should go and spend whatever time they have with people they love. Implying that Aurene is who Comm loves but then again Caithe is there too. The 3 of them were going to spend the last of their lives with each other. (not saying they don’t love the rest of the group, but had they decided to leave, the 3 would still stay together.)

As from War Eternal to till now their co-parental connection is getting stronger.

#guild wars 2 #Caithe #The Commander #sylvari #charr

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ploppythespaceship · 4 years

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In Defense of Will Riker

Riker gets such an unfair reputation in the Star Trek fandom. So many people genuinely can’t stand the guy, which is their right. He can be a somewhat boring character with a strange and even nonexistent character arc. But a lot of this dislike stems from the idea that Riker is a sexist, misogynistic creep who is actively trying to get into the pants of every woman he meets. Which is so far from the truth, I don’t understand how it’s still the perception.

First of all, we’ve done this song and dance with Kirk before. Enjoying dating and sex does not make someone a creep. If everyone involved is a consenting adult, it shouldn’t matter who you’re dating and/or sleeping with.

Secondly, TNG goes out of its way to show that Riker is a great guy. If you actually go through his episodes and look at how he treats both the women he works with and the women he’s interested in, you’ll see that he always treats them with respect. And in instances where he has an easy opportunity to take advantage, he never does it. Because Will Riker is a gentleman who drinks his respect women juice.

I’m so sick of this argument that under the cut I’ve compiled all of Riker’s important relationships with women on the show to demonstrate exactly what I mean.

I pulled most of these from the relationships section of Riker’s Memory-Alpha page, which is pretty thorough, and a few just from memory since I rewatched the whole show pretty recently. I don’t think anything relevant has been left out, but feel free to let me know if you think of something else. I’m all for some civil discussion of these things! Emphasis on civil.

Deanna Troi

Starting with the big one! The very first episode establishes that they have a romantic history, and have since split up. The details of their relationship are pretty scarce, but it’s clear that they had an intense, intimate connection. Initially they’re awkward but professional around one another, and this eventually softens into genuine friendship. They are close, possibly closer than anyone else on the ship. But Will never, not once, pressures Deanna into romance with him. He is entirely respectful towards her. In a few episodes they’re possibly shown to be dating again (it’s unclear) but Deanna gives no indication of being uncomfortable with this arrangement. When they officially get back together in the films, their feelings are clearly mutual and neither is being pressured into anything.

Frankly, Will and Deanna are an excellent example of a healthy relationship with one’s ex, respecting boundaries while maintaining closeness. The two of them are always shown supporting each other. It always bugs me that people think there’s something insidious going on here. Will isn’t just trying to get back into her pants. He genuinely loves and respects her.

And it’s worth mentioning that in “Second Chances”, when Deanna is interested in dating the alternate version of him (later known as Thomas), Will clearly isn’t thrilled about it, but also respects her decision and does nothing to intervene. When she talks to him about it, he is very clear that he does not expect her to ask for his opinion or for his approval, and that as long as she’s happy, he supports her.

Tasha Yar

Frankly they don’t have many distinct interactions that I recall, but Riker treats her the same as he treats everyone else on the crew. He is respectful of her, her rank, and her position.

Beverly Crusher

Not a hint of romance in their relationship. They are friends with a healthy connection built on mutual trust. Again, he is respectful of her, her rank, and her position.

Kathryn Pulaski

You can copy paste everything I said about Crusher, tbh. They’re friends and quite respectful of one another. Nothing untoward happening here.

Lwaxana Troi

Lwaxana flirts with Riker sometimes. Cause she flirts with everyone. Though she leaves him alone a bit more since he’s involved with her daughter. And yet again, Riker is entirely respectful of her, though he does gently have to tell her to back off at times. Eventually they settle into the classic son-in-law / mother-in-law relationship.

Beata (“Angel One”)

Does this episode suck? Yep. Is this relationship awkward as hell? God, yes. Is Riker being misogynistic? Nope! He actually goes out of his way to be respectful of this matriarchal society’s customs, even wearing an outfit that many in his culture would consider demeaning. Not to mention, Beata is primarily the one coming onto him, not the other way around. He’s simply reciprocating. It might be poor judgment, but it’s again entirely mutual and consensual.

Minuet (“11001001″)

Riker goes into the holodeck to relax, and then meets a nice holograhic lady to help him do just that... and people get mad that he enjoys that? Minuet is programmed specifically for this. Not to mention the Bynars literally designed her to be irresistible for him. Of course he’s gonna be besotted with her. And, issues of hologram sentience aside (Trek hadn’t delved too deelpy into it by that point), this is once again entirely consensual.

Minuet does pop up again in “Future Imperfect”, sort of, simply because Barash needed to choose a figure to serve as Riker’s late wife. With someone unable to distinguish holodeck memories from real ones, Minuet would seem like a perfectly reasonable choice.

Brenna Odell (“Up the Long Ladder”)

This is an entirely consensual one night stand. The feelings are clearly mutual. Even while they’re bickering, it’s obvious there’s an attraction underneath it, on both sides. Again, their fling might be poor judgment, but absolutely not misogyny.

Yuta (“The Vengeance Factor”)

This is one of the few episodes where I can see why their relationship might make some viewers uncomfortable, but I also think it’s the most telling as to why Riker is not the creep people assume him to be.

The cultural and status differences between them place Riker at a clear power advantage compared to Yuta, which makes for an imbalance. Yuta is a servant, and her entire mindset is that of serving others. Having a relationship on equal footing with someone like Riker is entirely foreign to her, and she struggles against her instincts to follow all of his wishes without question. That being said, Riker does basically everything he possibly can to address and negate that imbalance. He does his utmost to respect her and her position. He doesn’t force her into anything she isn’t ready for. Any time she tries to fill the role of a servant for him, he stops her to explain that he wants her to be his equal. You could argue that this relationship is inappropriate regardless, because the power imbalance still exists whether he wishes it to or not, but I think it’s important to note how dedicated he is to not taking advantage of this girl.

And of course, at the end of the episode he is forced to choose duty over love and must kill her, but it’s hardly his fault that she’s a secret assassin.

Lal (“The Offspring”)

He flirted with her while unaware of who she was, and stopped immediately upon realizing. And she kissed him, not the other way around. Just look at his face! He clearly didn’t expect that. He did absolutely nothing wrong here. Using this brief scene against his character is just absurd.

Commander Shelby (“The Best of Both Worlds”)

For some reason the consensus in this episode is that Riker is rude to Shelby because she doesn’t want to sleep with him. And that’s just a complete and utter misread of the episode.

First, there is absolutely no indication that Riker is romantically interested in her. Nor does she does not reject his advances, because no advances are even made. Second, Riker gets short with Shelby at times because she has been assigned to work under his command, and she’s questioning his decisions and generally being difficult to work with. It’s literally his job to call people on things like that. That being said, he’s never particularly rude to her -- at least, no more rude than she is to him. They also grow into mutual respect by the end of the episodes, to the point where he trusts her to serve as his first officer.

Lanel (“First Contact”)

( TW: rape mention )

Quite frankly the next person to point to this episode as evidence of Riker’s misogyny is getting slapped. She. Raped. Him. Full stop. He needed to escape, she offered to help if he slept with her, and he agreed because at the time it was the only way to save his life. Consent under duress is not consent. He does not appear comfortable with the arrangement, and his joking afterwards is forced. So let’s just stop holding this episode up as proof of Riker’s sexism, mkay? He was undeniably the victim here.

Carmen Davila (“Silicon Avatar”)

There’s not much to glean from their brief interaction where Riker asks her to dinner, but again: feelings are mutual. Everyone’s consenting. Nothing untoward happening here. Besides, she’s killed not five minutes into the episode, so it doesn’t particularly matter.

Etana Jol (“The Game”)

Riker’s having a fling with her on Risa. Because that’s what you do on Risa. You go vacation and have fun, and if you so choose, you can find someone else there wanting to have fun. And you have some sexy fun together. That’s just how it goes on Risa.

Also, she’s revealed to be playing him and literally brainwashes him to access the Enterprise. So the situation is not entirely within his control. Again, let’s not blame the victim here.

Ro Laren

There’s clearly sexual tension between them in some episodes, which mostly comes across as bickering. Riker is sharp with her when he needs to be, as a commander, but also tells her when she’s done a good job. The only time they sleep together is in “Conundrum”, when all their memories are erased. Therefore they’re unaware of the context that a romantic relationship isn’t entirely appropriate. When they remember again, they are awkward but respectful of one another, and now have a stronger friendship for it. And I’ll say it for the umpteenth time: mutual and consensual.

Soren (“The Outcast”)

This episode is controversial as hell, and it’s always a tricky one to dive into. But as far as Riker’s relationship with Soren is concerned: there’s honestly nothing bad happening here. He is respectful of her culture and is impressed by her as a pilot and scientist. Though he clearly has feelings for her, it’s unclear if he would have been the first to pursue them, because she confesses hers for him first. Before then, he was entirely professional with her. Only when their mutual attraction is confirmed does Riker actually pursue a relationship with her.

(Side note, that conversation is also when she comes out to him as female.(Yes, Riker was attracted to her before knowing she was female! At the time he believed her to be androgynous/non-binary. Which makes him canonically not straight.)

Additionally he is 100% respectful of her gender -- one of the only people to do that, in fact -- and does what he can both to respect her culture while also supporting her and her journey. He’s genuinely gutted when she’s forced to conform to the expected gender of her society, and isn’t allowed to be who she truly is.

Don’t get me wrong, this episode is a hot mess in many other aspects, but Riker’s treatment of Soren is one of the few things it got right.

Kamala (“The Perfect Mate”)

Is this episode super uncomfy with an almost laughably sexist plot? Oh yeah. But can we blame Riker for anything? Not really. Kamala can read men to make herself everything they desire -- the perfect mate, as the episode’s title says. Naturally this extends to her scenes with Riker as well. She flirts with him, comes onto him, and he’s clearly very into it. They kiss briefly, he’s tempted -- and then he stops her, because he knows this isn’t appropriate and she’s promised to someone else.

Let me say that again: Riker has a perfectly willing woman in front of him, who is literally doing everything in her power to be as appealing to him as possible. She is right there for him to have if he wants. Which he does. And he still tells her no, to keep a clear professional boundary between them. It would have been so easy to take advantage of that and later say she was too irresistible. Yet he didn’t.

Amanda Rogers (“True Q”)

Amanda is a young girl, 18 at the oldest, when she arrives aboard the Enterprise. She’s pretty enamored with Riker, cause she’s a kid who doesn’t have a great sense of what’s healthy/appropriate and what’s not yet. Riker is very aware of this, and does absolutely nothing to encourage her. He sets boundaries where appropriate and is obviously just waiting for her crush to die down, so he doesn’t have to hurt her feelings. When Amanda really starts to make moves on him, he very clearly tells her no. She actually starts to force him to play out her romantic fantasies using her Q powers, though she stops when she realizes it’s not real and isn’t right. Riker does nothing wrong in this episode.

Rebecca Smith (“Genesis”)

There’s nothing to go on here except that they had a date in the holodeck. Everything seems on the up and up. She’s not even shown onscreen, just mentioned in a couple lines of dialogue. I’m just including her for the sake of being thorough.

tl;dr

All of Riker’s relationships are either entirely consensual, or non-consensual with him as the victim. In several situations he could easily have taken advantage of someone, but never does, instead choosing to set clear boundaries. I have been thinking and scouring through Memory-Alpha and I genuinely cannot find a single instance in which he behaved in a sexist or misogynistic manner. That isn’t to say it never happened, I certainly can’t remember every moment of a seven season show. But it’s hardly a defining character trait for him the way many seem to think.

There are plenty of other reasons to dislike Riker. He can be immature. He rather stupidly stays in the same position for a decade because he can’t be bothered to take his own command the way he should. He can be a bit dull as a main character. The way he gets into chairs looks very stupid. But he is not sexist or a creep. *drops microphone*

#star trek: the next generation #star trek #the next generation #william riker #will riker #personal #i spent way too long on this pls validate me #mostly prompted by people genuinely hating this guy #to the point where they add onto other people's riker posts with hate #which is not cool at all #anyway

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