#He looks so fucking cuuuute

[pact-with-faith]

!!!! I did a tiny bit of grinding for DV for the discounted 10 pull, and he came home TWICE!!!

#photo #screenshot #leap speaks #original post #nb #omnb #beelzebub #beel #!!!! #He looks so fucking cuuuute #Ill try to queue up some stuff for the twins for their bday!

[iloveprettyboysblog]

He's Such a Cinnamon Roll 💞💕

#sebastian stan fluff #sebby stan #sexy saturday #sebastian stan smut #sebastain stan #hes so sweet #hes so cuuuute #hes so soft #hes so fine #followforfollowback #800 followers #he makes me so soft #soft boyfriend #soft bby #soft boy #big softy #i love him #he looks so fucking good ughhh😍😍🤤🤤🤤🥵💞💕💞💘💘💘 #the literal loml #the loml #heart stealer #he owns my entire heart #my bae #soft saturday #i want to run my fingers through his hair #it looks so soft #ily ily ily #my comfort person #i adore you #my mans

[another-lost-mc]

having a brainrot about how it would be if the characters turned into their animal type (is that what that's called?)

like imagine a shady sorcerer happen to accidentally cast a spell that changes them into their animal type how fucking cute and funny that would be

-🪶

a/n: that's so cuuuute. I went with the symbolic animals from their banners.

the wild side | the demon brothers + karasu

0.5k words | sfw | fluff + humor

related: the dateables' version

The Peacock (Lucifer)

How he responds to you vs. how he responds to everyone else:

He can't keep his feathers fanned out on full display as much as he wants to because he keeps getting stuck in doorways.

He walks around the house in a slow strut. Sometimes he spins around to show off all 360 degrees of his exquisitely-feathered beauty.

He doesn't notice that sometimes he smacks you in the face with his plumes if you're nearby.

The Crows (Mammon and Karasu)

They both bring you gifts and intimidate the others that try to get too close.

They're even more clingy than normal too.

It's surprisingly easy to tell them apart: Mammon's feathers are tipped with white, and Karasu's eyes have a deep scarlet glow.

The Snake (Leviathan)

He desperately wants to curl himself around your arm or leg. He'll try to keep his space if you're visibly creeped out by snakes though, he doesn't want to scare you.

An alternative you could try is wearing one of his oversized hoodies: he'll curl up inside the pocket and every once in a while he'll poke his head out and flick his serpentine tongue at you.

If you don't like that either, he'll curl up in the bottom of your closet or under your bed, somewhere dark and warm where he can still be close enough to keep an eye on you.

The Unicorn (Satan)

The House of Lamentation wasn't designed for horses or horse-like creatures.

He's the only one Lucifer won't try to chase away, his hooves look deadly.

Satan doesn't fit in your bedroom easily but he'll follow you in the hallways or inside the larger rooms with more space.

You are definitely going to recreate this movie moment at some point before the magic wears off:

The Scorpion (Asmodeus)

He's a bit bigger than most scorpions which means he's even more cute or gross depending on how you feel about them.

He's careful not to hurt you with his pincers if you pick him up.

He must be powerful even in this form because he releases sweet-smelling pheromones when he senses you're nearby.

He curls in the makeshift bed on you place on your desk for him. He's surprisingly calm even though scorpions are usually nocturnal.

His eyes have an eerie pink glow. You didn't notice it until you turned off the lights at bedtime.

(He stares at you until you fall asleep.)

The Fly (Beelzebub)

He's a bit larger than a normal fly.

He's restless and his wings are so noisy when he buzzes around you.

Most of the time you can hear the faint sound of his wings coming from the kitchen.

When he's not eating, he's usually hovering on or near Belphie.

The Cow (Belphegor)

He barely fits in your room and he snorts irritably when you raise your arms up and remind him that he is definitely not allowed to sleep on your bed like this.

He's even more annoyed because he can't go up to the attic like this either.

He just happens to plop down in front of your doorway to sleep instead. The others can't climb or go around him easily. He flicks them away with his tail when they try. He doesn't mind if you climb over him though.

read more: obey me masterlist

#obey me #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me karasu #obey me fluff #obey me headcanons #obey me imagines #obey me x reader #x reader #gn!reader #my oc: karasu #obey me oc

[doomedmoth]

Not fast, just furious

Pairing : Daniel Ricciardo x Reader

Warnings : use of y/n, smau, unhinged behavior, alcohol and cigarettes consumption, kys joke, suggestive texts, chaotic fluff, grumpy x sunshine, lando getting bullied

Synopsis : During his winter break in Australia, Daniel meets a barmaid with a big heart and a bigger mouth. When she starts following him during the races, fans are a bit unsure of how to deal with her unhinged behavior and total lack of media training. Daniel loves it.

Moth’s prophecy💡: Hi friends ! Pls be kind, it’s my first attempt at a smau and I’m on mobile, so the formatting might be weird. Also sorry if your name is Malva, it was the first one that came to mind lol.

[Instagram] yourusername just posted a photo

yourusername Walking in the club like we regulars

Liked by yourbff, melbournemirage and others

view all comments

yourbff leaving the club like an overworked mom

Liked by yourusername

melbournemirage our favorite employee 🤩

Liked by yourusername

yourusername wouldn’t mind a raise then 🤪

user1 gorggggg

yourbrother stop drinking on the job bitch

yourusername get a job before judging me bitch

*****

[Twitter] f1.driv.updates just posted

*****

[Instagram] yourusername has added a story

[Instagram] yourusername has added a story

[Instagram] daniel3.jpg has added a story

*****

[Messages] Daniel has sent you a text

*****

[Instagram] wagupdates just posted a photo

wagupdates New wag alert ?? Daniel Ricciardo has now been seen a few times with an unknown woman around Melbourne and Perth during his winter break. At first thought to be a childhood friend, sources say they met at the bar where the young woman is working, and they have been getting quite cozy 👀 What do you think ??? 📸 via Australian celebrity press

view all comments

danyfanclub she looks cuuuute

user1 anyone got her @ ???

user2 apparently he been hanging out at melbournemirage so maybe she works there ???

malva she looks messsyyyy, doubt it’s gonna last till the season starts…

danyfanclub stay mad

*****

[Instagram] daniel3.jpg just posted a photo

daniel3.jpg Aussie adventures before going back to vroom vroom

Liked by lando.jpg, yourusername, and others

view all comments

maxverstappen1 honey come home the kids miss you

Liked by daniel3.jpg

user1 what camera do you use ???

wagupdates do we spy the new girl on the 4th and 7th slide ??? 👀

user2 THANK YOU I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE

user3 sneakyyy

danyfanclub can’t wait to see her in the paddock ‼️

landojpg we missed you at karting mate 🥺

daniel3.jpg sorry, too busy drinking cocktails 🤪

*****

[Messages] Your coworker has sent you a text in Charlie’s Angels

*****

[Instagram] melbournemirage just posted a photo

melbournemirage Today we mourn the loss of our best bartender, yourusername . She had been with us for a little over a year now, and was the light of Melbourne Mirage, our pride and joy. She always won employee of the month, and not just because she created and awarded the title herself. A gathering in her memory will be held tonight at 9pm, everyone who knew and loved her is free to attend 💔

Liked by daniel3.jpg, yourbrother, and others

view all comments

yourbff LMAOOOOO

yourusername WHY THE FUCK DO YOU MAKE IT SOUND LIKE I’M DEAD I JUST QUITTED ???

melbournemirage sometimes we can still hear her voice… 💔

daniel3.jpg don’t worry I’ll take good care of her 😇

yourcoworker you better 🔪

user4 DANIEL ???

danyfanclub finally we have the @ !!!

*****

[Instagram] yourusername has added a story

[Instagram] yourusername has added a story

[Instagram] daniel3.jpg has added a story

*****

[Instagram] yourusername just posted a photo

yourusername last month stuff

Liked by danielricciardo, lilymhe and others

view all comments

yourbff damn girl, money suits you well 😍

yourusername right ???

malva wow, gold digger much…

danielricciardo thank you for getting Max to fly us around babe 🥰

maxverstappen1 as if I was not offering after every race…

landonorris why don’t you offer me after every race ???

maxverstappen1 you can walk

landonorris TO SILVERSTONE ???

user1 from barmaid to wag, girl is living the dream life

user2 smoking is not cool girl…

yourusername minding your own fckn business is tho

*****

[Twitter] paddockwags just posted

[Twitter] yourusername just posted

*****

[Messages] my sun 🌞 has sent you a text

*****

[Instagram] daniel3.jpg just posted a photo

daniel3.jpg Sorry my cat bites, I found her in the streets. She’s a good girl irl.

Liked by yourusername, carmenmmundt and others

view all comments

yourusername don’t reveal my secrets 🙄 (love you)

daniel3.jpg the world has to know ❤️‍🔥 (love you more)

lilymhe I can confirm the good girl part

yourusername I’ll be the best for you 🥵

alex_albon HM EXCUSE ME ???

danyfanclub ppl love to hate on her because she’s not trained like a nepo baby but honestly relatable queen !!

user1 boy is simping so hard

user2 she looks so fun to be around, finally a wag that doesn’t look fake

malva yeah she definitely got the street cat look…

user3 OMG GET A FUCKING LIFE GIRL

danyfanclub being this salty won’t make him like you go get a grip

*****

[Instagram] yourusername has added a story

user1 replied to your story :

Did you and Daniel break up ???

malva replied to your story :

fucking finally, so looooong

danielricciardo replied to your story :

have fuuuun, I’ll call you when my plane lands 🐶

******

[Instagram] yourusername just posted a photo

yourusername Back where everything started. I know I sound like a bitch sometimes, but to my love, my sun, my pup, I am so glad I met you 6 months ago. You turned my life around and I can’t wait for more shenanigans with you. You make any place feel like home. I love you. To everyone else, especially those who thought we broke up because I had the audacity to go home two days before him : Fuck you all ❤️

Liked by maxverstappen1, yourbrother and others

view all comments

melbournemirage we were so happy to have you back, even for just a night ! Soon a #speeddating night at the Melbourne Mirage everyone ? 👀

Liked by yourusername

yourusername stop promoting yourself on my account

maxverstappen1 glad to have met you this year bro

yourusername #mates4life

user1 I didn’t know they were so close !!

danielricciardo my love ❤️‍🔥

yourusername my sun 🌞

user2 highway looking pretty good for a nap rn

user3 goooosh they are so cute I’m gonna kms

danyfanclub FROM THE MAIN ACCOUNT TOO ‼️

malva still not buying it

This user has been blocked

yourbrother you did not have to come back so soon

yourusername jeez 🤡 at least pretend to be happy for the gifts you little shit

yourbrother thx I guess

yourusername you’re adopted

landonorris can you bring me back some Tim Tam ? 🥺

danielricciardo no ❤️

yourbff no ❤️

yourusername no and kys ❤️

landonorris damn 🥺

#doomedmoth #fanfic #rpf #formula 1 #formula 1 fanfic #formula 1 rpf #f1 #f1 fanfic #f1 rpf #f1 smau #y/n #reader #f1 x y/n #f1 x reader #daniel ricciardo #daniel riccardo x reader #daniel ricciardo x y/n #daniel ricciardo smau #dl3 #dl3 x reader #dl3 x y/n #dl3 smau #fluff #grumpy x sunshine #black cat x golden retriever #fake social media #f1 imagine #bartender! reader

[goldenamaranthe-blog]

Happy Easter: Dysfuctional Family

Charlie: (blowing a kazoo through the hotel while wearing white bunny ears and tail, carrying an Easter basket, and throwing bright colored and decorated eggs everywhere)

HAPPY EASTER, EVERYONE!!!

Hazbins: (groan collectively)

Vaggie: (slightly distracted by the tail) Hun, love the enthusiasm, but do you even know the purpose of Easter Sunday is?

Charlie: (cracks open a Cadbury egg and siphons out the innards with her tongue) Isn't it just an excuse to binge on chocolate and snuggle fluffy little bunnies and ducklings?

Angel: (clutches his pearls in ex-Catholic Italian horror) Mama Mia!

Lucifer: *Squeeeeee!* I'll be right back!

Vaggie: I guess that's a more corporate way to put it.

Angel: That's IT!!! I'm making my Mama's Italian Easter Bread! Charlie, you need to be schooled on Easter!

Alastor: Hmmm... I suppose if we're doing a full celebration, I can do a little something to liven things up. (Snaps his fingers, and everyone's clothes are transformed into various colored Bunny footie pajamas)

Charlie: (wearing hot pink bunny jammies and twirls) Oooooh! These are so cuuuute!

Vaggie: (in pastel lavender pajamas and snarling) Cabron!

Angel: (sneaky smirk as he wears a pastel pink and white two-piece pajama suit) Oh, Smiiiiiiles?

Alastor: (simply wearing red bunny ears) No.

Angel: C'mon! Hear me out! (Whispers in Alastor's ear)

Alastor: Hmmmmm.... I'll allow it! (Snaps his fingers again)

Vaggie: (baggy bunny jammies suddenly transform into a black and velvet purple, Las Vegas Showgirl bunny suit with white tail and ears, fishnets, and heels with purple wrist cuffs)

Angel: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! LOOKING GOOD, VAGS!!!!

Vaggie: (growls and tries to cover herself) FUCKING-A, ANGEL!!! WHAT THE HELL DID YOU TELL HIM?!?!?!

Angel: Does it matter? I don't have a soul to sell. (Sees Charlie) Ha! Might wanna focus on your girlfriend, Toots.

Vaggie: What? (Looks at Charlie)

Charlie: (blushing, heart eyes, panting like a puppy, and her pajamas turned into a similar Showgirl suit but red with fox ears and tail)

Vaggie: Ch-Charlie? Charlie! No. No! Charlotte Morningstar, we are in front of guests! Shit! (Runs down the hallway)

Charlie: (hearts explode around her head) Hippity-Hoppity, that ass is my property! (Gives chase)

...........

Vaggie: (rounds back around the corner while carrying Charlie bridal style) Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

Lucifer: (rides in on a tidal wave of fluff infused rubber duckies while wearing yellow ducky footie pajamas with orange webbed feet) RELEASE THE QUACKEN!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Alastor: (sighs in aroace exhaustion as a random rubber duck bounces off his head)

Angel: (slowly calming down as he wipes a tear from his eye) It's just like home~

#happy easter #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel incorrect quotes #dysfunctional family #big brother angel #moderator middle child vaggie #youngest sibling charlie #uncle alastor #bunny suit #vaggie #angel #charlie #lucifer #alastor #release the quacken #thirsty charlie #semi feral charlie #bunny suit vaggie #fox suit charlie

[moonjxsung]

Okay you’ve been doing a lot of hard hours hard thoughts etc and I just want your opinion on Minho with a soft tummy instead of abs. Like. I feel like I’m the minority on this because 🥲 the few times we got a glimpse of his tummy it was soft and cute and 🥺 I like to think he doesn’t have abs but a soft baby tummy where you can lay your head and maybe poke it and place little kisses on it.

And maybe he’d be a little insecure about it the first time you have sex because most people just assume he has hard rock abs for some reason so he’s worried you’re going to be disappointed 🥺

Feel free to insert hard thoughts about this if you’d like because this just makes me too soft to think about anything other than fluff.

In other words SOFT TUMMY MINHO SUPREMACY

~🌷~

SOFT TUMMY MINHO SUPREMACY 🗣️‼️‼️🦅

It’s so funny you say this bc this specific photo:

Literally lives on my Pinterest home page RENT FREE and every time I see it I’m like yeah ofc he looks mouth watering and sexy as fuck but his tummy def looks SOOOO CUUUUTE under that tank top :( I feel like exactly the way he gets insecure about his scar he’d get insecure about his tummy and he would constantly be making jokes about how he really needs to start bench pressing more or doing sit ups bc his abs are nonexistent. And of course he’s still super toned but he’s not six pack, you know? And the first time you guys have sex he’s probably more insecure than you are bc he hates that he can’t flaunt some sculpted six pack for you and he plays it off by laughing a ton (his cute ass lil melodic giggle) and being all “stop, you’re gonna laugh at me!” When he removes his shirt and covers his torso. And it’s literally nothing to laugh at in the slightest, like it’s just a normal torso leaning toward muscular but he’s still so soft, all his delicate little curves and the way his chest rises and falls when he laughs and his stomach frames his collar bones sooo beautifully and he just looks SO ETHEREAL. And obviously the sex is fucking amazing and it’s always amazing but it’s particularly sexy when his stomach contracts while you’re on your knees sucking him off before he cums. Or the way his abs clench when you’re riding him and he’s desperately trying not to cum just yet and you make it even harder when you sprawl your fingers out over his stomach and glide your fingertips along his skin. It just becomes such a central part of your fucking sessions together like running your hands all over his stomach and paying attention to the way his stomach sucks in a little before he cums and it’s so sexy. Not to mention cute bc when you guys aren’t fucking you’re definitely showering him with kisses and tracing little hearts on his skin there. And sometimes cuddle sessions are exclusively your head on his stomach with his shirt rolled up so that you can lay on his bare flesh and press little kisses while he talks about his day :( and he doesn’t love his body but he acknowledges that it’s quickly become one of your favorite parts about him so he stops insulting himself so much bc why would he insult something you love :( soft tummy Minho cuddle sessions could heal me I just know it

#🌷 anon #UR SO REAL FOR THIS #soft thoughts #hard thoughts #stray kids #skz #skz smut #stray kids hard hours #skz scenarios #lee know #lee know smut #ask

[earthtoharlow]

Previous Chapter

SERIES MASTERLIST

THESHADEROOM

liked by 975,085 users

theshaderoom: Look who’s back! #Y/NY/L does her first interview since leaving social media for over a year! Y/N talks about becoming a mother and dating #Drake and ex #JackHarlow

“Sometimes, I look in the mirror in the mornings and just say to myself “Oh my God! Bitch you’re someone’s mother!” It’s hard work, but I love every part of it. “

Y/L continues “it doesn’t feel like work though, having Ariel has made me look at the world with a new set of eyes. This sounds spiritual, but I really do feel born again.”

The rapper/model couldn’t hide the smile on her face when asked about Drake!

“Aubrey, brings me so much peace. After everything that happened in my last relationship, the idea of a new relationship was out of the question. Starting a family with him has made me finally understand why it didn’t work out with anyone else. He was always meant to be the one for me.”

Additionally, Y/N reflects on her past relationship with Rapper Jack Harlow.

“I’ll be honest, the day his Vogue feature came out. I immediately called him. What people don’t understand is that I was with him for 2 years, we were planning our whole lives together. I won’t go into details about our conversation but after that I sat back, watched, and cried while letting them have their moment. Which hurt a lot but I’m grateful for it because now I’m with the person I’m supposed to be with.” Click the link in our bio to read more!

view all 14,689 comments

user: aw I’m really so happy for her

user: something seems fishy about them idk

user: see how y/n can do an interview and not talk shit about Jack Harlow?! Even though he deserves it!!

user: Drake can’t keep a women so they’ll be broken up soon

user: I know Jack and all his baby mamas shaking and crying

user: no wonder Stacey is jealous of Y/N

user: she’s so mature because if my ex was slamming my name in interviews I would raise hell!!!

user: she seems to be in such a great place mentally!

user: damn she’s really a mother

THATGIRLSTACEY

liked by jackharlow, haileybieber, kimkardashian, justineskye, chrissyteigen, oliviaculpo, neelamthadhani and 783,529 others

thatgirlstacey: that look when bitches can’t keep your husband name out their mouth

view all 5674 comments

user: girl, you need to be worried about if Jack had another baby on you

haileybieber: 🤦🏼‍♀️ tell me about it

user: yeah y/n is weird

user: so y’all can talk about her but she can’t?

user: y/n didn’t say anything bad about you or your relationship

user: you lucky y/n didn’t drag tf outta you both

kimkardashian: sending you love 💕

user: ok enough about y/n girl you look good af

user: bitches stay jealous

jackharlow: love running their mouth 🙄

user: you ain’t broken up with him yet?!!

user: you won, you got the man! Leave y/n alone

JACKHARLOWSOURCE

liked by 5,790 users

jackharlowsource: Jack Harlow and Stacey James-Harlow at the “White Men Can’t Jump” movie premiere!

view all 635 comments

user: my parents

user: damn sorry to hear that

user: they’re so cuuuute!

user: Glad to see they’re still together! I was getting worried especially with reports saying they separated!

user: she’ll never leave that man, same tbh

user: he was never that happy with Y/n

user: goals

CHAMPAGNEPAPI

Liked by yourinsta, icespice, partynextdoor, chubbsview, Beyoncé,SZA, urbanwyatt, druski, and 1,425,116 others

champagnepapi: I would clear a whole town for you 🤞

view all 836 comments

celeb: that’s twin!

celeb: love y’all!

celeb: now when something happens in Kentucky we know who did it 🤣

yourinsta: don’t play bout mine 💕

celeb: wipe that white boy like a snotty!

celeb: yeah they need ass beat

YOURINSTA

liked by selenagomez, saweetie, dojacat, sza, summerwalker, urbanwyatt, flomillishit, 1dessdior and 678,367 others

yourinsta: For him it’s whatever with whoever 🤞

view all 8,457 comments

saweetie: I know that’s right bby!

user: goals

user: yeah fuck Jack and his wife!!

selenagomez: 💕💕💕

user: love seeing you so happy

user: between Drake’s post and this one, I think Jack about to get touched 😵‍💫

SZA: 🤭 kill bill

TMZ_TV

liked by 996,468 users

tmz_tv: Details are scarce, but according to a report on Hollywood Unlocked Jack Harlow was celebrating the release of the White Men Can’t Jump reboot when he was punched in the face.

According to a source, the celebrity-filled after party was going well until Jack Harlow reportedly acted rudely towards wife Stacey James for unknown reasons.

A few guest tried to intervene but the situation got worse. He was confronted about his behavior to his wife and mother of his child.

The source told Hollywood Unlocked that a physical altercation occurred between the guest with Harlow leaving with a “bloodied nose."

view all 13,678 comments

user: HOLY SHIT

user: ovo crew definitely jumped him

user: deserved

user: imagine getting jumped in front of your family I’d cry

user: drake said he’d spin bout y/n and he meant that

user: I think this is just karma

user: what a dick

user: omg can someone check and see if he’s okay

—————————————————————————-

AN: damn that’s crazy 🤪 I’ve missed toxic Jack so much so I wrote this up! Next part of this AU series probably won’t be up until Father’s Day because we still have to find out if Jack had another baby 😳 so much drama

Tag List:

(message me if you'd like to be added or removed)

@heavyhitterheaux @hoodharlow @neon-lights-and-glitter @babiefries @toocriticalharlow @mace23477 @jackmans-poison @dstark-0706 @harlowsbby @itsyagirljaz @leftapricotprofessorlover @laylasbunbunny @ilyangelsxo @comehomeimissyou @minkookie95 @harlowcomehome @jackharloww

#jack harlow x reader #jack harlow x y/n #jack harlow reader #social media au #jack harlow instagram au #jack harlow #toxic

[ashnavigatorofdreams]

Finally finished the sleepy Lucifer drawings! They were so cute I just had too 🥺♥️

If boyfriend NOT pillow, then why boyfriend wear shoulder pads?? Hm???

“Al? The fuck you waking me up so early for?” I have a H/C that Alastor like seeing Lucifer all sleepy so he wakes him up early sometimes just to see it 🥰 (ngl he looks more high than sleepy here but eh. What you gonna do 😂)

And this chibi one is cuuuute 😍

Hope you enjoyed!

#artwork #art #drawing #fanart #artists on tumblr #hazbin hotel #hazbin alastor #hazbin art #lucifer x alastor #alastor x lucifer #alastor the radio demon #hazbinhotellucifer #lucifer morningstar #radioapple #appleradio #ship art #they are so cute

[steviesbicrisis]

Stranger things rewatch thoughts

I’ve recently decided to do a rewatch since I don’t remember anything that happens before the scoops ahoy shorts™️ and all of my memories are covered in a thick layer of rainbows and unicorns thanks to Tumblr. I don’t know if anyone will be interested but I wrote down my thoughts while watching 😂 this is season 1:

Where is Steve? I miss Steve

EW STEVE GO AWAY EW

Honestly Mrs Wheeler isn’t half as bad as I remembered

Joyce best character ever I don’t make the rules

Mike your crush on will is showing, embarrassiiiing

Jonance looking cuuuute

But also Nancy this boi took pics of u naked how are u so chill about it

I’m remembering why I love hopper so much

YES SLASH THAT FAKE WILL

Nancy being scandalized by Jonathan taking a gun is cracking me up

Not Nancy crawling into a creepy ass portal in a tree like wtf dude who do you think you are? Alice in wonderland?

Steve I really hate your current friends, when are you going to ditch them and become fruity for our resident fav metalhead weirdo?

Me pulling out google translate to understand what the Russian are saying: am I Robin Buckley?

Wait a fucking minute, the Party’s bullies were just chilling in the woods, causally brought a knife with them and stumbled upon Mike and Dustin?? How in hell-

I swear to god I have no clue how Carol kept dating Tommy after he almost kissed Steve in front of her

I’m sorry Harrington but that ASS going up the ladder, wow

Hopper best dad ever 🥺

Will telling Mike he’s the one keeping them together meanwhile Dustin is literally the reason why they stayed together

Steve wanting to apologize is so cute, my poor heart

NANCY PUT THE GUN DOWN OMG

I’m sorry but there’s just no way Jonathan knew the lights were actually Joyce in the upside down, I call bs

Okay HOW DID BRENNER SURVIVE THAT??

I did not remember the Wheelers going to pick mike up at the school, what did they tell them? Did they give an explanation at all? Lmao

I cannot wait to see season 2 I need some answers

There are Christmas lights and the season ends with snow and Christmas, stranger things is a Christmas tv show #confirmed

Did Will just throw up Dustin’s future pet?

Here my thoughts on season 2!!

#I don't what this even is #but you can see my mental breakdown over steve's ass #and my bias for jopper #and dustin #if anyone likes this im gonna post my thoughts on season 2 lmao #stranger things #stranger things rewatch #random st thoughts #somehow i managed to fit steddie into this #im so good at my job

[corpsebasil]

I'm sorry but knight! Nikolaï got me hORNY—

So just think about it: like, kinda a corruption kink but the other way around? The Princess being very, VERY MUCH INTO HIM and being like "damn Imma bang that man"

And Knight Nikolaï being loyal to his duties so he's trying to not understand or see her advances, but god damn his patience and will to stay professional are wearing thin just like the clothes of the princess seems to gradually become around him uhuh

ARGBLBLBLB HAND ME THE HOLY WATER RIGHT NOW

Dear mother above—

^^^ me and you walking to his room.

Sir Nikolai isn’t a man that is unused to being fawned over. Women and men alike—nobles, citizens, who gives a shit—all want him. The man is literally sex on legs just LOOK at him. LORD.

The one person he’s surprised to find attracted to him, though, is you. Your royal highness. Aka the princess of Ravka and his personal charge. He takes his role of protecting you extremely seriously. He does a security sweep practically every time you enter a room. He keeps his eye out for any possible threats, always a step behind you. Always.

Yes he finds you pretty—who doesn’t—but the idea of sleeping with you goes against every moral fiber of his being.

It starts small when you realize you aren’t going to get your way with him at first.

DRABBLE UNDER THE CUUUUT

Oh god he’s so beautiful anyways—

“Sir Nikolai.”

“Princess.”

You’re watching him from one of the chairs in your sitting-room as he works, sorting through some documents as you’re supposed to be reading. You literally cannot focus.

The rustling of papers and the occasional shift of his body in his chair are the only sounds occupying your rooms as of now and, to your chagrin, you can’t stop staring at his hands. The way his fingers run over the documents, the way he licks his thumb quickly to flip a page, good God.

“I can feel you staring.” He says, not even sparing you a glance as he works. You scowl.

“I am not.”

He raises one eyebrow and you slump lower in your seat, face hot.

You’ve had a crush on your personal guard since pretty much forever and you know that he knows. He finds it entertaining to tease you sometimes; he’ll find excuses to help fix your hair, he holds your hand a bit longer than necessary when escorting you out of a carriage, and he especially enjoys the look on your face when you see him flirting with other women of the court.

I picture his grin like this.

Also Elliot Knight is fucking gorgeous.

He just smiles at you from across the room and goes straight back into his conversation.

You know from gossip around the court that he’s an absolute god in bed. The maids—those damn gossips—all giggle and blush as they whisper about a night with him or someone they know, their voices not quiet enough to stop you from picking up a few details while they clean.

You want him. You want him so bad it makes you look STUPID.

If you’re going to get this man on top of under, behind, down low, up high, all the positions you then you’re going to have to start being a little bolder, sweetheart. You start small: staring more openly and forcing yourself not to look away when caught. Brushing against him when you walk by just to have an excuse to be close to him. Making comments out of the blue about how you’re just so bored and touch deprived.

Poor you.

He catches on instantly.

“Princess.” He starts one evening, watching you as you approach him clad in one of your adorable nightgowns that leave nothing to the imagination. Picture Aelin’s gold nightgown, HA. His teeth are grit so tightly that he can actually feel his jaw hurt as you walk by. “Where is your robe.”

Not a question. He knows exactly where your robe is because you left it on his bed after sneaking quickly through the shared door in your chambers. He’d made the mistake of telling you he’d be right back and you took your chance. You’d be giggling like a fiend when he knocked just now, eyes dark and expression unamused.

He didn’t bring the robe, though. Oddly enough.

“It’s too hot for a robe right now.” You lie, ignoring his annoyed stare as you pour yourself a glass of bourbon from a decanter. “Besides, this dress is new. Don’t you like it?”

“You forgot the rest of it.”

“This is the newest style!” You argue, grinning to yourself as you feel him watch your back. The material is thin as hell and Saints you look fucking magical in it.

Meanwhile Nikolai, behind you, is feeling warmer and warmer the longer you fix yourself a drink. His eyes roam across your bare skin, his blood burning in his veins as he watches the slight sway of your hips. He can imagine running his hands along those long legs of yours, skin soft under his fingers.

How responsive would you be for him? Would you be loud or quiet? Calling out his name or only gasping and whining for him? Would you let him kiss your thighs before he buries his mouth between your legs? Would you let him bend you over his desk or set you on top of it?

Lord have mercy—

He licks his lips thoughtfully as he continues his observations. Surely you’re taking longer on purpose so that he can stare.

The clink of the glass hitting the counter snaps him from his fantasies before he realizes he’s been caught blatantly checking out your ass with his mouth hanging open a fraction.

Shit.

Your smile is devious and proud when you turn to face him, leaning slightly back against the table to meet his eyes.

“Something wrong, Sir?”

“Princess.” He clears his throat and glances up at the ceiling for a moment. “This isn’t appropriate.”

“I’d hope not.” You snort. You walk towards him and he stays still, every inch of him tense. He doesn’t look away as you tilt your head, chin lifted up to his in offering. He doesn’t take the bait.

“Princess.” He grits out. “Please. Stop.”

“Stop what?”

“You know what.”

“I’m not doing—”

But you shut up when his hand reaches out to snatch your wrist in an iron grip, your fingers hovering barely an inch away from his chest. The gap in his loose shirt reveals smooth, golden skin, your fingertips frozen.

You glance up with a tiny gasp and he’s watching you, his eyes darker and more serious than before.

“I cant let you start anything.” He breathes, hand tightening on your arm. “Not like this. Not with me.”

“Why?” You question, face falling as you look up into his eyes. “Why not?”

“You’re jail bait, kid.”

“What does that mean—”

“Your father would kick my ass if he saw me with you. You know that.” You huff through your nose and attempt to pull away but he holds fast. “Y/N,” he starts and your heart aches. Not ‘Princess’, Y/N. “you have no idea the things I’d do to you.”

You freeze as his head lowers a fraction, nose barely touching yours. Your breaths are unsteady as he tucks your hair behind an ear, hand framing your face.

“You’d never want to leave my bed.” He adds and the ache shoots from your heart to right between your legs. “The things I’ve thought about you.” He closes his eyes and, after a beat, whispers a quiet ‘fuck’ before practically tearing himself away from you.

You don’t even have time to protest before he’s heading back to his rooms and shutting the door behind him.

Ughhh OAJAOSK I NEED HIMMMM

#shadow and bone #nikolai lantsov #nikolai lantsov x reader #nikolai x reader #shadow and bone imagine #knight nikolai lantsov #sir nikolai lantsov #sir Nikolai

[thechekhov]

Dungeon Meshi - Quick Reacts (CHA 13: Boiled in Seawater)

What are we eating this time? 

Oh, I see. Chilchuck’s on the menu!

Don’t shun the poor boy, his ideas were good. 

Chilchuk: sees random box

Chilchuck: MIMIC SPOTTED.

oh there’s a sTORY HERE

I mean, he’s not WRONg but I definitely want them to eat a mimic.

oh no

NOOO POOR GUY

WHAT private life, Chilchuk? you’re literally in the dungeon for months on end. What do you do that ISN’T this?! 

I would DIE for sweepy Mawcille 

I don’t know why but the idea of this little coin just goin about its business is super fucking funny to me. I will 100% incorporate these guys into my dungeons now. 

run, little coin!

Chilchuck, were you trying to protect the coin from--

oof. don’t be so hard on yourself, bud. 

Marcille is still a sleepy little caterpillar and I love that for her. 

How did y’all not hear the gate slam down?

I’m also surprised they didn’t raid everything in this room. Like, there’s clearly bags and barrels and that cabinet. Did you look in them at all? How did Chilchuk stop them from opening the mimic box? Wouldn’t they be all over it?

I know foreshadowing when I see it. 

someone oiled those hinges REAL well

IT’S USING THE BOX AS A HOUSE CUUUUTE

lmfaoooooo Laios’ stupid trivia is gonna save your life

OOF that was close. Your scarf!

hold on, is the coin bug like... a baby mimic????

How loud is he yelling and why don’t they hear him?!

oooh, it’s crab stew for dinner!

Sleepy Marcille came through! She’s a good girl!!!!! 

awww only barely, honey. Only barely. 

Laios just petting it... 😂

This anger goes DEEP. Conquer your hatred by eating it, Chilchuck.

Stop re-traumatizing him, Senshi 🤣

What is dungeoneering if not bullying your companions relentlessly, day after day?

You really wanted to save that little coinbug....... Precious. 

I’m..................................................OKAY???????? I GUESS???????

........okay I kinda thought he was 19, but also, if he’s a Halfling Half-foot isn’t that still very much BABY? 

In comparison to Dwarves and Elves, I guess, yeah.

I KNEW IT. LAIOS WAS THE BABY OF THE GROUP ALL ALONG. AHAHA

#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #chekhov reads dungeon meshi

[daydreamgoddess14]

Gala pt. 2

MASTERLIST

‘Reader insert’ – They haven’t heard Ted swear before or raise his voice, when they get dressed up for a gala the first word out of Ted’s mouth is “Fuck.” - for @dadbodfanatic-x . AFAB!Reader.

Chapter 1

Did this chapter get away from me? Yes it absolutely fucking did, sorry about that!

Chaper 2

You feel more awkward than you could possibly imagine. Worse than sixth form prom where the zip burst on your dress and you had to be tied into it with your best friends shoelaces. Worse than the morning after a one night stand at Uni where you found yourself in a seminar with the person whose bed you'd slept in. Worse than spending the next three years in lectures, seminars and on nights out with that same person. Your stomach churns, the granola bar snack you'd had while you got ready threatening to make a reappearance. To your stressed mind, the only logical conclusion is that you look terrible. You must do - what on earth else would make Ted of all people swear. As soon as you're clear of the red carpet, you dart inside to the loos to check the damage. Lipstick on your teeth? A broken heel? Fuck no, a nip slip?

The dress was far, far lower than you'd normally go for. Its lowest point was lower than the curve of your breasts, so a nip slip was the most likely possibility. On a good day, you were pretty happy with your breasts but you'd really rather they weren't on the front page of the Daily Mail, and you weren't exactly sure whether this was a good day after all. Panic settled into your body like it had found a new home, making itself comfortable in your rapid heartbeat and shaking hands. You're still staring blankly into the mirror when Keeley breezes in on the highest heels you've ever seen. 

"Babe, amazing red carpet! You looked fucking fiiiiit!" She sang.

"No." You said, a little louder than you expected. 

"Umm yes, actually. And don't even get me started on Te-"

"Something's wrong isn't it, what is it? My hair? Have I got lipstick on my face?" Keeley stopped flitting around and took your hands in hers. 

"Hun, nothing's wrong - why would you think that? You look beautiful, I would kill for my tits to look like that. And where I have this boring flat pack arse, you have a bum that Kim K would probably love to clone or do coke off! What could possibly be wrong?" You frowned, panic slowly being kicked out by confusion.

"I heard Ted swear, I thought I'd done something wrong?"

"Ha! Far from it - I think you scared his words away! He only had a single fuck left to give and he gave it to you, how sweet!" She burst into giggles. You look back to your reflection. No stray lipstick, no nipples making a break for freedom, no wild hair. You looked fine, good even. Maybe edging close towards great. Not the best judge of your own appearance (ever the self saboteur), you had to trust Keeley. Shoulders down, head up, you allowed your good posture to boost your confidence. The posture correction resulted in a boob lift and waist amplification that you wished was shouted from the rooftops for everyone to discover - 'Your body is beautiful! But for fucks sake it's better if you stand up straight!' Keeley came to stand behind you, a couple of inches shorter, even in heels. She locked eyes with you in the mirror. "Fucking gorgeous. I'd do you." A peal of laughter rippled through your body and you joined her in giggling at your reflections. "See - and that smile the icing on the cake. You look hot babe, own it. If Ted isn't ready to admit it then there is an entire football team out there who I'm sure would give you a good time!" 

"Oh jesus Keeley, no! I'm too old for them - they're babies! It's been too long since I had sex for me to settle for a disappointing fuck with a footballer who only got their driving licence last year."

"So if its a toss up between sex with a footballer or no sex at all… it's a no? Be fucking for real right now! Some of them are not so young. Isaac's cuuuute." She teased. 

"Isaac is gorgeous, and trust me, I'd be ready in a heartbeat, but I think my crush on Ted might be ruining all other men for me."

"Well then tonight is recon - I'm pretty convinced he likes you, but I'm open to being wrong for one night only. We do the work, find out what the crack is and if it's a no, then you move on and spend your time on someone who does like you."

"Bish bash bosh, easy as that, eh?"

"Sure is. Now, can we please get out of this bathroom and get a fucking drink before Roy decides I've fallen down the loo?!"

You'd only been at the bar for a moment when Richard was at your side offering to buy you a drink. You took him up on the offer and clinked glasses with him before turning to survey the room. You leaned back against the bar, letting your elbows hold you up. Rebecca was holding court across the room greeting shareholders. Keeley had found Roy and they'd joined some of the other players at a table. You tried to look as though you weren't looking out for Ted, but you couldn't help but feel slightly disappointed when your first sweeping glance of the room was fruitless.

"Looking for someone?" A deep voice said to your right. Richard raised his glass in greeting to Ted and went to join his friends.

"No, just seeing what's going on. I was curious to see how everyone scrubbed up." You raised an eyebrow at him. 

"And do they pass muster?" He leaned against the bar next to you. "Like what you see?"

"Hmm. They look great, as usual," You took a long drink.

"But?"

"But there's someone else far more distracting than a bunch of pretty boys."

"Ahh," he laughed a little, "of course, you've seen the same person I have."

"Have I?"

"Well, I hope so. I mean, I hope there wasn't anyone else pouring you into that dress this evening. I'm assuming you have looked in a mirror?" The blush started somewhere at the junction of your thighs, you were sure of it. The heat of it travelling up your body, across the valley between your breasts and up your neck until it flushed in your cheeks. 

"I… umm…" You breathed out a little laugh, "I'm not sure what to say to that." You admitted. He looked victorious,

"At last. It's about time I caught you out. You do it to me often enough." 

"I don't know what you're talking about, Coach Lasso."

"Ohh I think you do. But hey, if you want an out then here it is T Swizz" He nudged you gently with his shoulder so you turned to face him, peering at him over the rim of your glass. You scan his face, taking him in and let your eyes wander to check out his suit.

"I don't think that'll be necessary, I'm sure I'll get you back." Shenanigans on the dancefloor distract you just long enough for him to look you up and down without you noticing. You'd been slightly too far away on the red carpet and surrounded by photographers. Satisfied that Moe wasn't about to try and replace the DJ, you turn back just in time to see that he'd been looking. "Busted." You whisper with a smirk.

"I don't know what you're talking about." He threw your words back at you, blushing a little. "You look incredible, you're wearing the heck outta that dress."

"Thank you, Ted. Though it's hard not to get imposter syndrome." He waved your comment away, 

"You work with these guys every day. You're definitely not an imposter."

"Hmm. Work with, not socialise with."

"You socialise with me, do you feel like an imposter standing here?" He asked, you noted a little concern in his eyes.

"Nope, I think I'm feeling pretty good standing here." He smiled at that. You could see Colin waving over to you and decided it was high time you went to see the team. "Save me a dance, Coach?" You asked coyly.

"Just the one?" 

"I'll take more than one. If we run out of time, you'll just have to take me dancing somewhere else."

The boys were in high spirits, letting their hair down with a few beers in good company always put them in a great mood. They greeted you happily, pulled out a seat for you and complimented your dress, hair, anything else they could without overstepping.

"And your-" Jan gestured with his hands around his own chest, "look absolutely am-" he was cut off by an elbow to the ribs by Isaac.

"Oi, show some respect." 

"Thanks Isaac." Behind him, Jan did the chef's kiss gesture instead, making you giggle. The evening progressed smoothly, you sat with the team for a while before moving to the same table as Keeley and Roy. Ted was at the same table but sat directly across from you. With a couple of drinks giving him more confidence, you noticed his gaze linger on you for longer and longer each time he looked over. You tried to aim for composed and indifferent, focusing on laughing and talking with Keeley. With the auction over, Rebecca was also able to relax and the three of you enjoyed a couple of cocktails together. You danced to the livelier music with the team and Keeley, the DJ churning out classic dance songs. Eventually you dropped into the seat next to Ted, hot and breathing hard. 

"Hope you're not too tired?" He teased. 

"Don't worry Ted, I've got plenty of stamina." He laughed,

"Drink or dance?" He queried. 

"Dance."

"Quick decisions, I like it." He stood and held out his hand for her, leading her to the dancefloor. You stepped into his arms, looping your arms around his neck. You felt his large hands on your waist, could feel the heat from them through your dress. You moved together, hips slotted against each other. Your fingers toyed with the hair at the nape of his neck and you heard his breath hitch. "You know there's a bunch of footballers over there probably far better at dancing than me?"

"Maybe so, but I've been wanting to dance with you for a while."

"That so?"

"Evidently I was far better at disguising it than I thought I was."

"I wouldn't say that." 

"So… am I good at hiding my ogling or… not?"

"Just because I'm oblivious doesn't mean my fellow coaches are. Let's just say Beard has been very vocal about it." You hid your face by turning away from him and looking over his shoulder to glare in Beard's direction. 

"Excellent. Thought I was doing so well." He leaned down to whisper right into your ear, the whole of the side of your neck and down into the non existent neckline of your dress completely exposed due to the way your hair had been swept to one side. 

"So it's true?" You turned quickly, his lips brushing against your cheek as you did so, making you shiver.  

"The ogling? 100% true." You held his gaze, determined not to crumble in the face of your embarrassment.  You heard Keeley's voice in your ear, a cheerleading inner monologue. You're hot, you're smart, you're funny. Trust in yourself. The seconds ticked by and you could feel your resolve weakening and your heart pounding, nerves getting the better of you despite the gin and tonics you'd been sinking all evening. Finally, his hand on your waist gripped just a little tighter, slid just a little lower and he smiled. His eyes crinkled at the corners, darkening as you took a half step closer to him. 

"Good, thought I was alone on the ogling. Weird word." 

"You haven't been! I've never noticed!" He laughed at that, suddenly a bit surer in himself. 

"Ohh I have been. Love those yoga sessions you do right in front of my window. Love the yoga pants in particular actually, though this dress has a pretty similar effect." You were astonished. This whole time you'd been absolutely convinced that he saw you and saw sweatpants and a ponytail. 

"You should have joined in."

"Now that would have potentially been very embarrassing, so no." His hand once again drifted across the top of your arse making his intentions very clear. You'd no idea how long you'd been dancing at this point, songs had blurred into each other.

"Shame, I do love a willing student."

"I'm very willing, no need to worry about that. Only question is, how we gonna get out of here without being the talk of the room?"

"Sure that's what you want?"

"Are you?"

"Do I want you to get me out of this dress as soon as possible? Yes, please."

You don't know how it happened exactly, but it certainly involved Keeley (obviously). You were looking for a suitable opportunity to duck out when she'd collared you by the bar. 

"OK babe, I've done my recon and I can say I'm like 95% confident that he's into you."

"I know hun, we talked when we were dancing. Apparently I'm oblivious." Keeley would have been put out at being beaten to the scoop had she not been so excited instead. "Anyway, now I'm trying to get the hell out of here without it looking like that's what I'm doing, I'm avoiding the lads so they don't ask me to the after party."

"Is that why Ted looks like he's getting closer and closer to the door?"

"Probably, first one out calls a cab."

"OK… ok, you go now. Right now, babe. I'll say to Roy that I'd been with you in the loos and you didn't feel well." You beamed at her, kissed her cheek and darted for the door, shooting a quick glance in Ted's direction. Hidden at the side of the building, you brought up the Uber app and called for your ride. You turned around to check the doors and walked right into Ted, your heels nearly disappeared from under you and your soul left your body. 

"Holy shit, Ted! You scared the crap out of me!" He caught your elbow and held you steady. 

"Sorry, sweetheart, ready to go?" Behind you the cab had just arrived. You didn't say much in the car on the way to his flat. He'd asked where you'd rather go, not wanting you to feel worried about having someone in your space but equally not wanting you to feel like you couldn't leave if you wanted to. You hesitated behind him at the door as he fiddled with the lock, once open, he let you in first and you took the stairs up to his floor. Inside the door you toe off your heels. "Whiskey ok?" He asks.

"Please." You've been to the flat before, he hosted games night a couple of times, but you've never been here alone. You move to look at some of the photos he's got dotted around - mostly Henry, of course, but also one of the four coaches, one of all the players from a team night out, one of you, Rebecca and Keeley from Higgins late summer BBQ. "Cute photos." He hands you a tumbler of whiskey with ice. Shyness starts to take over now that the gin is wearing off so you're glad for the booze top up. 

"How long?"

"How long what?" You wonder.

"How long has the ogling been going on?"

"Ahh. Well, I've not quite been there a year. So…just under a year."

"No? Day one?"

"Day one." You nod. No point in hiding anything anymore.

"Same." You cough a little on the drink you'd just taken.

"No way."

"Honestly. Higgy was givin' you the tour and you just looked at Beard and told him his posture was terrible. And then you tore Roy a new one about how badly he'd been lookin' after his knee. I thought any woman who walks in on their first day and straight out the gate gives Roy shit ought to be worshiped." You arch an eyebrow at that, finishing off your drink. The ice cubes clinked as you set the glass on the mantle. "And all you've done for 11 months is prove everyday that you should be worshiped." He adds, his voice barely above a whisper. You scoff at his comment, 

"Hardly. I'm already into you, Ted," you tease. "You don't need to go that far." He frowned.

"Sounds like I do if you don't believe me?" You roll your eyes but before you can speak again he steps toward you and slips one hand behind you on your back and cups your cheek with the other. All coherent thought leaves your body. "If you don't believe me, I'm happy to show you." His eyes search yours and you meet him halfway in a long awaited kiss. The hand on your back lowers and he runs his large palm down your arse and squeezes, pulling you into him. You groan at the action, deepening the kiss. Your hands take on a life of their own, running up his arms and into his hair, pulling him as close as you can. He finds your zip and pulls it gently down, the heavy rose gold dress slips down your arms and drops to the floor with a soft thud. You're immediately exposed, you weren't able to wear a bra with the dress, and your soft lace knickers don't exactly provide much coverage. He moves away from you, originally to help you step out of the dress puddle, but is distracted by just how quickly you've ended up so nearly naked. You feel your arms moving to cover yourself, but he takes your hands. You step out of the dress, he doesn't give you your hands back, he pulls you back in to him. "You never need to cover up for me, honey. Fuck, you are so beautiful."

"And you're overdressed." You move to undo the buttons on his shirt, loosening the tie first and lifting it over his head. Each button opens him up more and more to you. At the last one, you pull the shirt out from his suit trousers. He takes the shirt off, you're far too distracted by ruining your hands over his broad chest, fingertips tickling across his soft stomach. You catch his eye, his expression hard to read - somewhere between shy and nervous. "You're beautiful." You reassure him in kind, planting kisses along his collarbone. Your hands span across his back, feeling the tension in his shoulders. "Hmm. I'd love to work those knots out for you, but I think there's more important things to do first." You mutter against his lips. Spurred into action, he walks backwards towards the bedroom, pulling you with him. You find the bed eventually, landing in a tangle of limbs and Ted's clothes. His body is pressed against yours so perfectly, you wonder how you've done without it for so long. His hands run through your hair, down your neck and the column of your throat. You tip your head back to give him more access and he roughly palms your nipple, making you gasp. "Fuck me, Ted." You moan, 

"Ummhmm, that's the aim baby." You swat his arm making him laugh somewhere near the underside of your breasts, his mustache tickling the soft skin. He travels lower still, a trail of hot, wet kisses against your stomach and hips. He hooks your knickers into his thumbs and looks up at you, a silent request. You smile shyly while he rolls them down your legs. Before you can think, he's settled between your legs and is moving your thighs apart. You could swear you see stars when he pulls your hips down the bed and sets his mouth on you. Your back arches you away from him until he brings an arm across you to pin you down. His mouth is hot and his tongue teases you in ways impossible to describe. He works you up until you can hardly breathe and the only sound you can identify is his name. Your thighs begin to shake, the pleasure almost too much, but he doesn't change anything he's doing. Your orgasm feels like it's been ripped from your body and you feel a sob rise from your throat, as if the relief is too much to bear. You're so out of it for a minute that you don't see just how affected Ted is, he moans into you, grinding into the mattress. When you can finally breathe, he follows his original path back up your body. You've slung an arm over your eyes but he gently removes it and kisses you. You taste the heady mixture of yourself and whiskey. He pauses, wanting to look at you, to check in. 

"You OK?" He whispers. You nod, still not quite ready to string a sentence together. You can feel his cock, hard and straining as it presses against your thigh. You move your leg just enough so that there's a little friction and he immediately bucks his hips towards you. 

"I need you, now." He says, making you whine. You pull him back between your legs and roll your hips towards his. He quickly slides his boxers down and grabs a condom from the side table. He's back and pressing against your core in no time at all. You cup his cheek as he did to you earlier, 

"Show me." He pushes into you, slowly, carefully until he's fully seated within you. You both take a second, but the weight of his body on yours and the feel of him inside you has you craving more movement, more friction. You roll your hips again, and he drops his forehead to your chest with a guttural moan. "Show me." You repeat. This time, he listens. Slowly fucking into you but building to a desperate pace. Your legs lock around his waist. The new angle has you on the edge straight away. With only a couple of thrusts, your own orgasm lines up with his, and you're both incoherent with the intensity. His body slumps against yours, and he leaves a tender kiss just under your ear. You're still trying to figure out how to breathe when you hear a stamping from the floor above. He moves off you, you instantly miss the delicious warmth of him. He discards the condom and reaches for his boxers. The stamping again. 

"Sorry, Ms Shipley!" He manages to shout. He looks down to you on the bed, still boneless. "I'll get you some water, be right back." He smiles. While he's gone, you use the bathroom and pull on a t-shirt you find in there. By the time he's back, you're sitting cross-legged on the bed.

"Thank you." You take the water gratefully. 

"Nice t-shirt." He smirks.

"You don't mind?"

"Definitely not." He reaches for you, and you lay down against him, tucking one knee between his. He runs his hand up and down your back. "I love you." You hear him murmur into your hairline just as sleep begins to take you both. You're just about able to reply, 

"I love you too, Ted." He holds you tighter. 

FIN

#ted lasso #ted lasso fic #ted lasso fanfiction #ted x reader #ted lasso x y/n #ted lasso x reader #ted lasso x ofc

[iloveprettyboysblog]

You're So Gorgeous 😍

#he's so gorgeous #danny ramirez #hot fucking damn #joaquin+torres #joaquin torres #the falcon and the winter soldier #tfatws #disney plus #mickey garcia #fanboy top gun #fanboy #top gun 2 #top gun #top gun movie #top gun maverick #top gun fanboy #gorgeous #he looks so gorgeous #gorgeous man #hes so cuuuute #hes so fine #hes so soft #hes so sweet #hes so hot #hes so sexy #he looks so fine #sir please.. 🥵🥵 #hes so fucking hot #hes so fucking cute #hes so fucking fine

[ohnococo]

Car sex with Ino pleeeeease 💕

At this point Ino’s playlist had been repeating the same songs more times than you could count, but most of it had gone unnoticed. After you’d hotboxed his car, and after he’d decided touching you was the only thing in the world he wanted to do, your minds were only on each other. 

Once his lips are on yours, he’s always quick to get his hands down your pants, teasing at you through your panties until they’re thoroughly soaked and you’re moaning into his mouth. This time he just can’t help pulling away from your lips to bury his face in the crook of your neck, the unavoidable smile on his face keeping the kisses he presses there much lighter than they would have been otherwise. 

“Baby, you’re so cuuuute.” He says it like it’s almost too much for him. It isn’t. In fact it’s just enough to have him finally sliding his hand into your panties and playing with your pussy properly. “You’re gonna let me fuck you, right?”

Of course you were. You had wanted that from as soon as he had texted you, asking if you wanted to go for a late night drive with him. He’s always going to ask, though, pulling away from your neck to look at you with sweet eyes. He almost looks like he’s begging, like you might say no, even though your pussy was making loud squelches thanks to his skilled hands. He stops, pressing his thumb to your clit and groans when he feels it pulsing as you clench around his fingers, mentally willing him to either make you cum like this or fuck you already.

“Pretty please?”

He’s always like this when you two smoke together. You wouldn’t have it any other way.

Ahhh thank you for sending in an Ino request! I've been thinking on my characterization for him and this prompt fit in perfectly. I definitely hc an au version of him as smoking, and definitely hc him as the type to beg a little even though he's the one taking the lead.

#reminder minors and ageless blogs get blocked #my writing #thirsty thursday #ino #ino x reader

[stellasfictionalworld]

part 2.

part 3

a/n: i got so excited i decided to right a second part already. reader is referred to as cupid. 

reader x andre anderson 

cw: (i mean you’ve watched the show so) implied sex, swearing, under age drinking, fluff, use of drugs, implied sexual assault

word count: 1,606

Your roommate is Ashley Carter. You two hit it off well, she’s been taking the Performing Arts courses. Although, you’ve suggested she might as well join Hero Management since she saved your ass last year. When your Student Rating skyrocketed after your fuck fest, she was right there beside you. Excited for you, and helped you point yourself in the right direction. She helped you find a marketing team, and read through contracts to make sure you weren’t getting scammed. It made sense, considering Ashley was taking some law classes on the side with her Performing Arts courses. 

Yet she loved the big screen, and it was made for her. Her power was that she could sparkle, like literally. Edward Cullen style, without the need for blood. She very much could blind the shit out of you or act as a disco ball. Anyhow, you two made the cutest insta posts together. Cupid and Glitter. 

Your name was called as you pulled a knee-high sock. You greeted your roommate as she flopped onto her bed. 

“Look at you,” you could hear the smile on her face. “You think you’ll get to be one of them? I can see it already,” she said.

You turned to your roommate and shook your head but you had a small smile on your face.

“I’d like to get to know them first,” you said, your heart sinking. You wouldn’t be used, not again. You put on the rest of your outfit and posed for Ashley. “What do you think,” you said. 

“Cuuuute,” she said, snapping a picture. 

“Thanks,” you winked. “What are your plans by the way?” you asked. 

“I think I’m gonna see Jen again,” she said. 

You grinned widely and your brows shot up. “You’re gonna find love before I do,” you said and her face started to get red. 

“Get out of here,” she waved you off. “Go see Andre,” she added. 

“Okay, but tomorrow. Drinks and stories,” you pointed at her and she nodded. 

…

It wasn’t till you got there, that you realized this was Dusty’s place. You’d gone to other house parties, but this place was a mad(crack)house. The shit that happened here, most of the time no one would remember by morning. Your stomach churned as you followed a group ahead of you. They opened the door and you were immediately hit with the smell of sweat and weed. The mad(fuck)house was booming with life. Dancing, snorting up cocaine, makeout sessions, and other crude shit happened right in front of your eyes. Someone bumped into you and you took that as a sign to move. 

You texted Andre, saying you’d made it inside. You licked the cherry gloss on your lips as you made your way around the house. You found the drinks and grabbed the first thing you saw. Your fingers trembled as you tried to get the top off. 

“Fuck,” you muttered in annoyance. The rancid smell of vomit hit your nose already. 

“Need help with that?” someone asked beside you. 

“Yeah actually,” you looked up with a sweet smile. Your blood went ice cold when you recognized the blonde you were looking at. Rufus, you’d heard rumors about him, they usually involved non-consent situations. A part of you told you to run, but you kept up the smile. Offering him the bottle and he cracked it open with ease. 

“Thank you,” she said and took a step around him.

“No problem,” he blocked your escape, putting a hand on the kitchen counter. “You’re Cupid right?” he asked. 

“The one and only,” you sipped your drink, “and you are?” you asked. 

“Rufus, sure you haven’t heard of me?” he asked with a slightly higher pitch. 

You pressed your lips together and knitted your brows together. You were picking at his ego on purpose, it’s what he deserved after all. 

“I think the name rings a bell, do we have a class together?” you asked. 

He laughed dryly, eyeing your tits now. Chills ran down your spine, fucking wanting to run. You were in his range, he could catch you the minute you turned around. 

He started to talk again, and your phone buzzed. 

“Sorry, give me a sec,” you said and you didn’t hear a response. 

Andre

10:03 pm

just got here, where are you?

You swallowed thickly as you typed away.

10:03

Kitchen, with Rufus. 

“Sorry ‘bout that,” you said with your fake smile. 

“No worries,” he stepped closer to you. Your nose scrunched up, overwhelmed by his cologne and alcohol breath. “What do you say, we go upstairs? I know you’re kinda on break, but c’mon,” he laughed, licking his lips. “I know you’re dying for some,” he finished his sentence. You would have gagged on the spot if not for the fact he thought you wanted this. He was giving you a choice, not mind fucking you yet. 

“I just got here,” you cracked a smile, “I wanna party a little first,” you said.

He did not like that. He stared at you, hungry for the parts of you that everyone knew about. You might as well have been naked, people openly talked about your body last year. Everyone knew about your magic touch. Rufus wanted more than a taste, and you were going to give it to him. Right to his crotch. 

Before your fist collided with anything, a hand wrapped around your hip. Your brows shot up and you looked over your shoulder. Andre pressed himself against you and smiled at you. 

“Sorry for making you wait,” he said, he gave your hip a gentle squeeze. “Rufus,” he said darkly, immediately Rufus cleared his throat. He backed the fuck up and eyed you then him. There were flashes of anger and fear between each glance. Then he muttered something before disappearing with a bottle of beer. 

You let out a breath of relief and blinked away the wetness in your eyes. 

“You okay? Did he do anything to you?” he asked, staring down the hallway Rufus had escaped with. You wondered if he hoped to have laser eyes at that very moment. You took in a breath and chugged the beer. 

“He didn’t, thanks to you,” you put down the bottle and grabbed a cold one. “Thank you,” you looked up at him and he nodded.

“It’s my fault if–” he said, and you shushed him. 

“Don’t. Nothing happened, it’s all good,” you smiled.

“Right,” he took in a sharp breath through his nose, “just stay with me. I’ll make sure he doesn't even fucking look at you,” he looked down at you. 

It was sweet, he got so pressed on your behalf. You could handle yourself, but sometimes you still needed saving. Though it wasn’t the first time you dealt with guys like Rufus, considering your last year in God U. Andre simmered down but hadn’t moved his hand the whole time. 

“Let’s party, yeah?” you said. “Didn’t you say your friends were here too?” you asked. 

“Yeah, let’s go,” his shoulders had dropped, and he gave you his iconic gorgeous smile. His hand finally slipped away, but you swear you saw his fingers flinch when he let go. You followed him, and he pointed to the group sitting outside. They were sitting on picnic chairs, around a foldable table. You immediately appreciated the fresh air, it was a bit cold making you close up your cardigan. 

There were a few people outside in the pool, some chilling outside of it. It wasn’t too noisy though. The table was filled with laughter as Andre and you took a seat. They’d saved an extra seat just for you. 

“Hey,” Cate greeted you first, then Luke did, and you received a nod from Jordan. “You two okay?” she asked with brows furrowed. Her big blue eyes twinkled because of the fairy lights, she looked like a Disney princess. One who looked so hot smoking a blunt before passing it to Luke.

“It’s fine.”

“Rufus was talking to her.”

You both blurted at the same time.

Your brow shot up and immediately the mood was killed. 

“Shit, did he do anything to you?” Luke immediately asked.

“No he didn’t, luckily Andre saved me,” you bumped shoulders with him. He gave you a small smile, but something told you he wasn’t going to let this go any time soon. Cate had gone quiet with a distant look in her eyes before lighting a new blunt. She handed it to you with a small smile. You dragged out the blunt and immediately melted into your chair. 

Time passed, and all of you discussed how classes were hard. You and Cate disagreed though. Andre needed saving before his grade dropped, so in between drinks. You’d offered to help him, tutor instead of giving him the answers. He seemed surprisingly excited by the idea, saying you should. His friends were rolling their eyes and grinning. 

You were so distracted with other shit, like how the sun umbrella looked like it was melting. Jordan had given you some good shit, and you’d cried to them. Saying how good this shit was, and how grateful they were your provider. They’d toppled over laughing in their fem form with you. You both eventually just couldn’t stop laughing next to the pool. 

Then you woke up in your bed. The drapes were open, causing you to groan. You fell out of bed and shut them immediately. Then you collapsed back onto your bed. You touched your jacket, realizing it wasn’t even yours. Then you sat up. 

“Holy shit,” you said. 

#reader x andre anderson #gen v x reader #gen v x you #cate dunlap #jordan li #gen v #luke riordan #rufus is so fucking nasty #anywayyyy andre to the rescue #if you can make jordan li laugh #i think you're immediately friends #andre anderson x reader

[jennyandvastraflint]

Xena Reactions S2Ep15! (I think this is one of my faves so far XD)

The awakening. And dudes being annoying

OH NO GABRIELLE!

Shdhdhs she just sloshed water on her to wake her

I love Xena fighting with a frying pan

NOOO GABRIELLE

shdhdvd "Xena, this is our only frying pan!"

"Can we cook with your juices?"

Gabrielle is not having a good day

Shfhdhd she knocked him out again

Oof, they're having a rough day

"You pinch him I ask the questions >:)"

"Heads, we take on the giant"

"Does your village have a shop that sells frying pans?" Please XD I completely understand Gabrielle tho

Are they playing guess who

"Were you killed by a certain warrior princess?" "Yes." "Well that narrows it down..."

XENA IS HUNGYYY

"You know, a frying pan would come in handy right about now" XDD

She caught her gf an eel sjdhd

PLS XENA LIKES THROWING FISH AT HER GF (ngl Vastra definitely did that)

"Another one's fallen for you" "AGAIN?"

"No I think [chainmail] would just attract a kinkier group." sjdhdhdbd

GABRIELLE USING THE SHAKRAM FOR CUTTING

"I've learned that she works in mysterious ways" She doesn't have plan

XENA USED HER SCROLLS AS TOILET PAPER 😭

Pls...

BOOB GRAB

Hmmm... No people

Uhhhh... Is this a fangirl

"And I can read" 😂

She has no strategy yet

O_O THEY'RE BATHING TOGETHER

Gabrielle lovingly washing Xena's hair

XENA SCRUBBING GABRIELLE'S BACK

"Because I do the sensitive chats"

"I'm less competitive than you are"

"Are you sitting on the soap?"

AWWW THEY'RE SPLASHINGGG

"HEY. Say goodbye to Minya" like a dog

"Wanna trade?"

CALLISTO KILLED THEODORUS "She was in my body"

There is a lot of tension here...

"You're a genius" "No"

Gareth? I think I've heard that name before

Awww, Gabrielle giving Minya her stuff to read

OH. The one who killed Goliath's family

"How are we going to get lightning bolts?" Oh, a kite

"Maybe if I run with it" she did not hear a WORD Gabrielle just said... 😂

"Have faith, Gabrielle" NOOOO SHE GOT HIT BY THE KITE

Yay it fliessss

AAAAAAH, THE STRING. My poor Gabrielle

"I think you're denying your feelings" fuck offfff...

GABRIELLE WANTED TO JUMP HER

Damn grab her boob armour

"I just gave her some advice about handling men"

I'm still a hater of the Goliath episode... Goliath loves

Xena bored? 😂

"Cut him some slack, he's just stomped an entire army"

Him just screaming at her, and she's just like :3

MINYA

"looked so good in leather?" PLEASE 😭

They're both like ...Wat

"Don't let them die on a lost cause"

AWWW THEY COMMUNICATE (*looks at the Victorian wives who could use some communication*)

JESUS HE'S BIG

She stepped on his toes after tying the kite to his belt

"Come on, handsome" djfhdsh

I love the way they utilise perspective. They definitely had two different size bones for this.

"Goliath says Hello" AND ZAPPPPPP

Oop he's proper torched

"That bunch up there looks like a big dipper" THEY STARGAZE. OR STARGAYS!?

CUUUUTE

Bwahaha Gabrielle thonked her nose 😭😂

AWWWW, SHE KISSED IT BETTER

They're so married ajdhdhfhd I love them

#v watches xena #delightful #I made Paternoster Gang art about this #xena warrior princess #xena and gabrielle #xena #gabrielle