#Here are the Names For Each Side of a Right Triangle | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

luvhaos · 2 years

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elevator pitch | ml

pairing: frat boy! mark lee x f! reader genre: college! au, frat! au, fluff, angst word count: 9.1k summary: you hardly talk to any of the members of nu kappa tau until you go to one party and now, all of a sudden, they’re all so eager to chat with you and tell you all about their “brother,” mark lee. (alternatively: four times mark’s friends tell you about him and one time you ask them about him). warning(s): alcohol use and underage drinking, cursing, backstabbing, sort of but not really love triangle author’s note: the handful of frat parties that i’ve gone to inspired this but unfortunately, no cute frat boys like the ones here. also this is not proofread so please forgive any mistakes playlist: crash landing by nct 127 • nonsense by sabrina carpenter • disaster by conan gray • be by my side by crush

GROUND ZERO

You and Yuqi glance at each other and then back to Minjung and her pleading puppy dog eyes. “Please,” she says again, pouting for extra effect.

Yuqi asks, “What’s the real reason you want to go to the NKT party?”

“I told you!” Minjung says, “I want to get a feel for the party scene here! And aren’t you two supposed to want to show me all the university has to offer? You’re being bad upperclassmen!”

You squint at her and ask, “It wouldn’t be because of that guy you told us you met on orientation, would it? What’s his name? Jimin?”

“Jisung,” Minjung corrects too quickly. “And no, that’s not the reason. I really, really just want to go to a party! Come on! Please!”

You sigh, “Okay, okay. You know that we need to know a brother to get into this party, right?”

Minjung frowns and asks, “Do you know any?”

You shake your head but Yuqi, begrudgingly, replies, “A friend of mine is in NKT.”

Minjung perks up and you sigh again. It’s not that you hate frats or going to frat parties or even frat guys. You enjoy a good party with free booze, though you could do without the sweaty basements and red and blue lights, and you even have some friends in other frats. It’s just that NKT leaves a sour taste in your mouth when you recall that your sister got her heart broken by one of the members. To add insult to injury, she was a senior and a member of NKT’s sister sorority while he was a sophomore at the time, so it was embarrassing to her as well. You don’t remember his name but you’re sure that if you hear it, you’ll know who it is.

“Ground rules,” Yuqi tells Minjung, “first of all, we all stay together. No wandering off with people you don’t know. Second, don’t take a drink from a stranger and steer clear of the jungle juice, just covered drinks. Lastly, we’re out of there by midnight because you—” Yuqi pointed at Minjung, “—have an eight AM tomorrow.” Minjung makes a whiny sound at the back of her throat and Yuqi glares, which makes her quiet down. “Got it?”

“I got it, I got it,” Minjung says, nodding emphatically. She hugs you both quickly and asks, “Can we get ready together?”

“Of course,” you reply. “Doors usually open at ten, so we’ll head over a few minutes after.”

The evening rolls around quickly, and you’re standing in your dorm with Yuqi and Minjung. You’re pretty sure you heard your roommate, Sihyun, talking about going as well but you assume that she’s primping in another dorm.

You and Yuqi patiently wait for Minjung to finish tapping glittery eyeshadow to the corners of her eyes. You glance at yourself in the mirror on the back of your door and adjust the strappy top you have on. Yuqi smooths her hair down in the mirror as Minjung chirps, “All ready to go!”

The three of you make your way to Greek Row, where there’s already a small line outside the NKT frat. You already recognize one of the bros on screening duty — Johnny Suh, vice president of NKT. He’s in your leadership seminar and he’s pretty friendly, though he perpetually seems to forget pencils and pens. He is a very good public speaker, though.

As you shuffle forward in line, you take a look at the second member, holding the door open for people to stream in. You think he’s far too pretty to be a frat bro, all delicate features and lithe limbs. He offers sweet smiles at those who pass, giving you one when you and your friends make it to the front.

Johnny recognizes you and gives you a grin. “I didn’t know you partied.”

“Just don’t come here,” you say and you expect him to be offended but Johnny just laughs good-naturedly.

“Hope we don’t disappoint,” he says.

Yuqi’s friend, Yukhei, pops his head out from inside and calls out, “They’re cool to come in, Johnny.”

“Don’t worry, I already know,” Johnny says with a conspiratorial wink at you. “Jungwoo, you can let them in.”

The pretty one, Jungwoo, nods and says, “Have fun!” as the three of you pass.

Okay, so maybe NKT isn’t as bad as your sister made it out to be; the saying goes that one bad apple ruins the batch.

Minjung immediately tugs you and Yuqi over to the bar station, where you recognize two other upperclassmen, Doyoung and Kun, serving drinks. Kun’s the one who comes over to the three of you and he asks, “What are we having tonight?”

“Beers,” Yuqi says, “if you have any.”

Kun taps a finger against his chin in mock contemplation and turns to the fridge behind him. “I think we’ve got something like that.” He hands you three cans of Coors, and you thank him before wading through the crush of warm bodies to a space where the three of you can stand comfortably. You and Yuqi share a look when you see Minjung peering through the crowd, standing on her toes.

“Looking for someone?” you tease, taking a sip of your beer.

She flushes a little but it seems she’s found Jisung. She waves and he notices immediately, straightening and heading toward your little group, another three brothers in tow. “Hi,” Minjung says coyly.

Jisung returns her grin and then introduces himself. He lets his upperclassmen introduce themselves as Ten, Jaemin, and Mark.

You find yourself staring at Mark. He’s cute, with his backwards baseball cap and doe-eyes and high cheekbones. He meets your eyes and you look away, out into the crowd. You take in the writhing bodies and the thumping beat of the bass-boosted Waka Flocka Flame song blaring over the speakers that threatens to blow out your eardrums. You see your roommate, Sihyun, in the crowd and she sees you too. You raise your hand in a wave and it seems like she’s about to return the gesture but then, suddenly, she looks just to your left and frowns. Her gaze narrows and she turns abruptly from you.

What the hell was that?

Minjung nudges you and interrupts your train of thought. “Sorry, what was the question?”

“Can you be Mark’s partner for beer pong against me and Jisung?” You open your mouth to say no but you can’t resist the second round of Minjung’s puppy eyes and you know Yuqi sucks at pong, so you agree and let Mark lead your group to the table, where red solo cups are set in triangular configurations at each end.

You and Mark take one side while Minjung and Jisung take the other. You play rock-paper-scissors to determine who goes first, with Mark suffering a stunning loss against Minjung in the game. As Jisung lines up a shot, Johnny comes up next to you, off door duty now. He asks, “What do you think? You going to come to more parties now?”

“Depends on how this round goes,” you say.

“Well, then fair warning,” Johnny snickers, “Mark sucks at this.”

“I do not!” Mark huffs but all Johnny offers is a conciliatory pat on the back before leaving to mingle with other guests. Mark looks a little panicked while he assures you, “I’m not bad, I promise.”

You laugh and pat him on the arm. “We’ll see, Mark. We’ll see.”

As the game progresses you see that Mark is not… bad, per se, but he’s definitely not the best player. Neither is Minjung but Jisung, on the other hand, is a monster at the game, getting four consecutive ping pong balls into your cups and one plops into a corner cup. You return the favor, sinking five balls in a row. “Whoa,” Mark says, eyes wide and delighted. “Nice job!”

Minjung misses on her turn and Mark misses on his. Jisung sinks two more and you get one more in. You both sink some more shots, leaving both your teams at one cup. Mark’s getting in position to take his shot and you grab his elbow. “Here,” you say and you reposition him. “And just a gentle flick of the wrist. It’ll go in. Promise.”

Mark gazes at you for a second longer than you expect him too before he gulps heavily and nods. He follows your instructions perfectly, just flicking his wrist. The ball bounces and bounces and bounces right into the last cup.

You and Mark cheer and onlookers applaud you two while Minjung and Jisung groan. You raise your hand for a high-five before you see that Mark was readying himself to hug you. You lower your hand and pull him into a hug, patting his back. He smells surprisingly nice — clean and a little citrusy.

When you two part, there’s a bit of an awkward silence that falls between you as the crowd disperses and Yuqi makes small talk with Ten and Jaemin. Mark lifts the baseball cap off his head, ruffling and smoothing out his dark hair before sliding the hat back on. He finally says, “I’ve, uh, never seen you at one of our parties.”

You hum, “Yeah, that’s why Johnny’s on top of me about if I like the party.”

Mark nods. “Then, how’d you get so good at pong if you don’t go to frat parties and stuff?”

“Frat parties aren’t the only place to play beer pong,” you say, finishing the beer you had placed down at the start of the game. “And I never said I didn’t go to frat parties, just not to NKT ones.”

Mark scratches the back of his neck. “Right, right. Uh, can I ask why?”

You shrug. It’s not like you’re going to tell him the real reason, so you just reply, “Didn’t really have a reason.”

“Aren’t you friends with Johnny?”

“I’d say we’re more good acquaintances. Besides, he’s older anyways so I don’t see him outside of, like, one class we share.”

“So, you’re a…”

“Sophomore.”

“Really?” Mark lights up and you can’t say you don’t like the way he lights up. “So am I!”

“That’s cool. Have you picked a major yet?”

“I think I’m going with English. What about you?”

“Probably polisci,” you say.

You and Mark make a little more small talk before Yuqi’s tapping your shoulder, looking a little apologetic, though you don’t understand why. “We’ve got to go,” she says, but she’s more telling Mark than you. “Minjung’s got a morning class tomorrow so we need to get her back.”

“Yeah, totally get it,” Mark says. Yuqi nods and moves a few feet over to pull Minjung away from flirting with Jisung. “Let me walk you guys out.”

As the three of you set down Greek Row, Mark calls your name and you turn. “Yeah?”

“Uh… just… I’ll see you around.”

You wave. “See you around.”

(You don’t look back, but Mark stands in the doorway until he can’t see you anymore).

THE FIRST PITCH: JOHNNY

Your alarm jolts you out of a dreamless sleep. You flail for your phone, frantically tapping the screen to shut it off. Sihyun’s already dressed but she’s gazing at you in a way that you’ve never seen before. She says, “I didn’t know you were close with Mark Lee.”

“Who?” you ask. Your mind is still half-asleep, and you’re honestly not in the mood for whatever tone she’s giving you right now.

“Mark Lee. You talked with him the whole time at the party.”

“Oh.” You slide off your bed and slide on your hall slippers, grabbing the small bag filled with your morning routine things. “I just met him last night.”

She squints at you but only gives you a terse “Okay” before she’s leaving for her classes. You roll your eyes at her retreating back.

You go through your morning routine, still rubbing sleep out of your eyes. You don’t have class until nine-thirty, so you figure you can go take a walk off-campus to grab a cup of coffee. As you get dressed, your phone buzzes on your desk and you check the text.

Mingi: CAN WE PLZ GET COFFEE AND SMTH TO EAT BEFORE CLASSES TODAY NEED CAFFEEINE

Yunho: Caffeine**

Yunho: And yes, please let’s get something to drink

You: yes please you two read my mind

You’ve been friends with Mingi and Yunho since orientation since you were all part of the same group. They had known each other since they were kids but you all immediately bonded the moment you met them. You’re in a couple of classes together but unfortunately, your leadership seminar today is not one of them. They’re also in Alpha Tau Zeta, which is the frat you frequent the most because of them.

You meet the two of them in your dorm lobby and Mingi immediately throws an arm around your shoulder. “Finally! I’m starving, let’s go!”

He doesn’t give you a chance to say anything as he rushes you out of the dorm and in the direction of your trio’s favorite cafe. “Did you see that picture from the NKT party last night?” Yunho asks you.

“No, I was there with Yuqi and Minjung yesterday but we left early,” you respond as Yunho whips out his phone to show you Jungwoo’s — the pretty one’s — Instagram, where there’s a picture of Yuqi’s friend Yukhei on top of the roof with two other guys, all with a can of beer in hand.

“I can’t believe you went to a party not at ATZ or SΛT.” Mingi clutches a hand to his chest. “Are you cheating on us?”

You give him a playfully apologetic stare and say, “Please forgive me, Mingi. I lost focus.”

Mingi clicks his tongue and sighs, glancing at Yunho. “What do you think?”

“I think we can overlook this transgression,” Yunho says but he narrows his eyes at you and adds, “Once.”

“My heroes.”

You make it to the cafe in record time, unsurprising given that Mingi had you all basically power walking to the place. You’re slightly out of breath as you order, and you glare at your friends when they snicker about it a little.

“How was it though?” asks Yunho as you wait for your orders.

You tilt your head at him. “How was what?”

“NKT’s party.”

“It was cool,” you say. “Not super different from Alpha Tau’s,”

Your friends give you fake offended glares so you add, “ATZ’s are better because you two are there, though.” Once their egos are sufficiently stroked, you say, “Met some cool people. Do you guys know Mark Lee?”

“Yeah!” Mingi’s so enthusiastic that you jump a little at the volume of his voice. “Really nice guy and super chill.”

“Are you close with him?” Yunho asks.

You shake your head and say, “You know, Sihyun asked me that this morning but no, I just met him yesterday.”

Mingi and Yunho frown at the mention of Sihyun and share some unreadable glances with one another. You’re about to ask about what sort of telepathic conversation they’re having but the barista calls your name and you let it go as you pick up your bagel and iced latte.

You part ways with your friends when you get back to campus, since they’re both heading to the Science Center. You’re walking over to your class in Jeong Hall, when you hear someone call your name. Johnny strides over to you, only needing a few steps to reach you. “How’re you feeling?” he asks.

“I’m fine. Honestly, I should be asking you that. Looked like the party got crazier after we left.”

“I’m all good,” he says, shoving his hands in his pocket as you both make your way over to Jeong Hall. “Can’t say the same for some of the others. I think Mark’s incapacitated in bed today.”

“Yeah, he drank a lot during pong and I’m sure after too.”

Johnny nods and holds the door open as you go to your class. You thank him and, in a surprise turn of events, Johnny takes his seat next to you in your seminar classroom. He says, “I know Mark kind of sucks at beer pong but he’s really good at ping pong.”

You blink at him. “That’s pretty random.”

Johnny shrugs. “Just saying that he’s not always bad at games.”

“Noted?” Johnny just smiles at you and you turn to the front as Professor Lim enters the classroom.

“Good morning, everyone! Did you all have a good weekend?” There are indistinct mumbles and Professor Lim moves on. “I’m glad. I know I mentioned it last week, but you were all supposed to prepare elevator pitches for today as if you’re recommending a friend be hired for a position. Remember, you have about thirty seconds to convey the most vital information to the other person. Pair up with whoever’s next to you and then I’ll call on each pair to come to the front of the class where you’ll present your pitch to your partner. Does that make sense?”

“Yes, Professor.”

She claps her hands. “Perfect!”

“Guess it’s you and me,” Johnny says cheerfully. You smile at him and reply, “Guess so. Did you prepare a pitch?”

“Nope!”

You probably shouldn’t have expected something else.

“So you’re just winging it?”

“Flying by the seat of my pants,” Johnny hums.

“I’m jealous,” you sigh. “I don’t think I’d be able to pull that off.”

Professor Lim calls pairs up to the front of the class. Namjoon and Jongin go. Joohyun and Chan. Then, it’s you and Johnny.

“I can start,” Johnny says.

“Alright.”

Johnny rolls his neck and stretches before he nods at your professor. She gives him a thumbs-up and starts the thirty-five second timer — thirty seconds to give your pitch with a five second grace period.

“I know that you’re hiring,” Johnny begins, “and I have a friend of mine who would be perfect for the position.”

“Tell me about them.”

“His name’s Mark Lee and he’s one of the most well-rounded people that I know. He’s an excellent writer, a good multi-tasker, and he’s bilingual with Korean and English. He’s a responsible leader but also a really good team player. Not to mention, Mark can sing, dance, and rap too, and he’s also pretty handsome. He’s five-foot-nine so he’s not too tall but also the perfect height for hugs. And while he may be lacking in some skill areas like beer pong and alcohol tolerance, he makes up for it with his skill in table tennis as well as his enthusiasm and dedication.”

Johnny finishes his pitch right at the thirty second mark. Peeking over your shoulder, you meet Professor Lim’s eyes and clearly, you’re both equally perplexed. The rest of the class is also confused but Chan starts the polite applause and the rest of your seminar class follows.

“Thank you, Johnny,” Professor Lim finally says. “That was… interesting, to say the least. But I will say you had some persuasive points. However, the pitch was unfocused towards the end.”

Johnny nods, unbothered, and thanks your professor for her feedback. You’re trying to go over the basic points of your own pitch of Yuqi for whatever imaginary position there is, but all you can really focus on is wondering just why Johnny’s giving you all these random facts about Mark Lee.

THE SECOND PITCH: LEE TAEYONG

“You’re a lifesaver, you know that?” Hongjoong says as you climb into the passenger seat of his car.

“No problem,” you say. “I will say though that I’ve participated in more Greek life events this week than I have in my entire college career.” Hongjoong chuckles at this as he pulls onto the street.

A few weeks ago, through Mingi and Yunho, Hongjoong begged you to go with him to some Greek event for board members of each frat and sorority at your university. You’re not a hundred percent sure what it is and it doesn’t really matter given that you’re just there to ward off Hongjoong’s ex-girlfriend, who was the head of one of the sororities. You don’t know Hongjoong as well as you know other members of his frat, but he’s been pretty nice in all your interactions together.

The event is hosted in an upscale hotel downtown in one of their event halls. Hongjoong helps you out of his car like a gentleman and shows the invitation to the event to the bouncer, who lets the two of you in and directs you down the hall.

“This is the fanciest place I think I’ve ever been,” you say.

“Me too,” Hongjoong says. He leads the two of you into the room, where there are already a bunch of people mingling in semi-formal attire. You see a few familiar faces: Joohyun from your leadership class is a sorority president, and everyone on campus knows Jackson Wang, the recruitment officer for Gamma Omega Tau. You also spot Johnny with some of his frat brothers in a small circle, talking conspiratorially in their huddle.

Then, you see Mark across the room, talking to a group of people. You can hear his laugh across the room and you wonder why he’s not with the other NKT members.

Hongjoong taps you gently and you snap to attention, sheepishly saying, “Sorry, sorry, zoned out for a minute.”

“No worries.” He nods at the waiter in front of you, patiently holding a tray of hors d’oeuvres out to the two of you. “Want anything to eat?” You take a piece of toasted bread with some high-end cheese spread on it and thank the waiter.

You and Hongjoong make your way into the crowd. He introduces you to some people but their names are a little jumbled in your head. You forget how many frats and sororities there are on campus.

You’re at the drink station, waiting for the bartender to finish with the group of sorority sisters in front of you. You catch a glimpse of someone who you swear looks just like Sihyun. Someone comes up next to you and you look over at him. He’s unbelievably handsome, his face all sharp lines and angles but somehow, there’s a softness to him too. He smiles warmly and says your name. You stare at him, shocked and he just giggles, “Sorry, I know you don’t know me. I’m Taeyong, the president of NKT.”

You almost choke on your saliva. First Jungwoo, then Taeyong… were frat boys just getting prettier nowadays? He leans against the bar. “It’s nice to finally put a name to a face. You’ve been a topic of discussion lately.”

You chuckle nervously, “Only good things, I hope?”

“Nothing but,” Taeyong replies. He glances at your dress and says, “I like your dress. It’s a nice shade of blue.”

“Thanks!”

He adds, “Mark’s favorite color’s blue.”

Just when you thought you met a normal member of NKT, he starts talking about Mark again. Then, Taeyong says, “I think his tie is that color, actually.”

All you can do is offer a small hum of acknowledgement. What are you going to do with that information? The bartender finally takes your order and when you get your drinks, you make a bee-line for Hongjoong.

“Here.” You hand him the drink. I’m going to use the bathroom,” you tell Hongjoong. He nods at you and you ask a waiter directions to the restroom.

When you get inside, you lock the door behind you. This bathroom is nicer than your room back at him.

You look at yourself in the mirror and at your dress. Mark’s favorite shade of blue. You smooth the skirt down before unlocking the door and stepping out of the bathroom.

You crash right into someone.

“Shit!” You both say at the same time and you immediately know the voice. “Sorry, Mark.”

“No, no, I’m sorry! I should have been paying attention,” he says and he helps you up. His touch is warm and sturdy. When you stand, Mark gives you a once over that makes you feel a little warmer than usual and he says, “You look great!”

“Thanks, so do you.”

“That, uh, that color looks good on you.”

“Thanks. It looks good on you too.” Mark glances down at himself, as if he’s just realizing that he’s wearing a tie the same color as your dress. He looks at you again and you both laugh a little.

“That’s a crazy coincidence,” Mark says.

“Yeah, it is.” You pause and wait a few moments before saying, “I won’t keep you from your business any longer.”

Mark’s quick to wave your concerns off. “No, I just had to take a break. Events like this are kind of tiring.” He then raises an eyebrow at you. “You’re not on the board of a sorority, are you?”

You shake your head. “I came as Hongjoong’s date.”

Mark frowns and his shoulders slump a little. “Oh.”

You don’t know why, but you hastily add, “We’re not dating or anything. I’m here to scare off some ex-girlfriend who is on a sorority board.”

Mark straightens up again. “Got it. That’s cool of you.”

“I guess so. But these heels are killing my feet.”

“You should take them off.”

You snort, “And have a bunch of judgy sisters and brothers look at my feet? No thanks.”

Mark laughs. He laughs loudly at that and you find that you really, really like making Mark Lee laugh. The two of you make your way back to the main room and you can’t find Hongjoong. Mark gets swept up in a conversation with a few friends from another frat, disappointingly enough.

You wander over to a less crowded corner where a few friendly sorority girls are standing a few feet away. They include you in their conversation, introducing themselves as Chaeyoung, Dahyun, Jiwoo, and Heejin. You make small talk with them and they’re all super sweet, asking to exchange Instagrams with you and telling you that you should all hang out sometime. As the five of you talk, you see that there are people making their way to the dancefloor at the center of the room. The music starts to pick up into something more catchy. The girls ask you if you want to dance with them but you decline, content with watching from the sidelines and waiting for Hongjoong to find you again.

It’s Taeyong that comes over to you again. “Not a dancer?” he asks, motion to the crowd.

“Just not into right now.”

“Mark’s a really good dancer, you know.”

“I know, Johnny already told me.”

“Johnny told you what about me already?” Mark comes to stand next to you and your bare shoulder brushes against his suit jacket briefly, but it’s enough to send some shock down your spine.

“That you’re a good dancer.” Taeyong’s giving Mark a look that you can’t decipher but Mark seems to understand it, turning to you and asking, “Do you want to—”

Hongjoong rushes over to you, whisper-shouting your name. His and Mark’s voices overlap and you’re left to wonder what Mark was about to say. You definitely know what Hongjoong’s scrambling to you about. Taeyong and Mark watch on as Hongjoong sidles up to you and slides an arm around your waist.

A minute later, his ex-girlfriend comes sauntering over, eyes narrowing immediately when she sees you. “Who’s this?” she asks Hongjoong, pointedly ignoring you. You let Hongjoong spin whatever story he concocted. You’re more concerned with the evil eye Sihyun is giving in your direction.

THE THIRD PITCH: DONGHYUCK

A week passes and you’ve a) gotten zero new anecdotes about Mark and b) not spoken to Sihyun at all, not for a lack of trying though. She’s icing you out, that much is obvious but you don’t know what you’ve done wrong.

You’re sitting in the library, trying to write a paper for your comparative politics class but your phone has taken up most of your attention for the better part of an hour. As you mindlessly click on your friends’ Snapchat stories, your screen shifts and a picture of Mark lights up your screen. He’s handing his card over to a cashier at what seems like the convenience store on campus, and there are five guys standing behind him, clearly unaware of the camera. You recognize Jisung and Jaemin in the photo.

What the fuck?

You reopen Snapchat. A few seconds later, another photo of Mark drops. This time, he’s got a guitar on his lap but instead of playing it, one of his arms is outstretched, clearly trying to take the camera from the photographer.

You just put your phone screen-up on the table and lo and behold, another AirDropped photo comes through. This time, Mark’s sitting beside one of the boys from the first photo, pointing at something in a book opened between them with a pencil.

You peer around the library. It’s massive, and people are on all sorts of devices so it’s impossible to discern who’s sending you photos of Mark.

Then, a notification banner drops. donghyuck ☀️(@haechannie) has requested to follow you.

You rub your eyes with the heel of your palms before letting out deep sigh. You open your app and tap on the follow request, surveying the profile. Your eyes land on the bio and it makes sense because Donghyuck has “NKT” in it.

That explains it all. You accept the request and ask to follow him back, which he accepts seconds later. His profile opens to you and you see various photos of NKT brothers. Mark appears in most of them, along with one, some, or all of the boys from the first photo. You tap on the most recent photo, dated to the NKT party you were at. Mark is passed out on the couch and Donghyuck took a selfie with his sleeping form. You have to suppress a snicker.

There’s an alert about a DM from Donghyuck and you go to your Instagram DMs.

donghyuck ☀️: hi :)

you: hi you: were you the one airdropping those pics?

donghyuck ☀️: yeah that was me donghyuck ☀️: just wanted to show you some of the sides of mark donghyuck ☀️sent a photo donghyuck ☀️: leader mark donghyuck ☀️sent a photo donghyuck ☀️: musician mark donghyuck ☀️sent a photo donghyuck ☀️: tutor mark

you: whats your angle here?

donghyuck ☀️: 🤷that’s for us to know and u to find out

you: do you mean us as in you, taeyong, and johnny or us as in your entire frat?

donghyuck ☀️: 🤷 donghyuck ☀️: did you know that mark can skateboard? donghyuck ☀️sent a photo

You massage your temples and exit out of Instagram, turning your notifications off. What were they playing at?

“That’s kind of rude of you.” You jolt when someone speaks from behind you. You whirl around in your chair and Donghyuck has his hands crossed over his chest, phone in hand. “I’m just trying to give you high quality Mark Lee photos.”

“What is with you and your frat’s obsession with Mark? Are you secretly a cult to him or something?”

“I’ll never reveal our secrets.”

You roll your eyes and start packing up your stuff. There’s no point in staying here if you can’t focus. Donghyuck doesn’t make a move to stop you but he says, “I’m serious though. Mark’s a really good guy, even if he’s annoying too.”

The last part makes the corners of your lips twitch upwards. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

As you leave the library, you nearly run into Mark a second time. You just manage to stop before you do but Mark just laughs, “We need to stop meeting like this.”

“We do.” You open your mouth to ask Mark something. You’re not sure what you want to say really, you just know that you don’t really want the conversation to end there.

But Mark says, “I’d love to stay and talk but I’m actually meeting up with a classmate for coffee and I’ve already kept her waiting.”

Something in your stomach plummets. “Ah, sorry, don’t mean to keep you.”

“You’re not!” Mark is quick to say but you shake your head and say to him, “I’ll see you around.”

“We’re throwing another party this week,” he says quickly. “If you’re interested.”

You give him a small smile and walk away with a knot in your stomach.

Later that night, as you lay in bed, reading, your phone buzzes with a bunch of notifications. You flip your phone over.

JOHNNY (@.johnsuh) has requested to follow you. Taeyong (@.tytrack) has requested to follow you. Lucas (@.wongyukhei) has requested to follow you. Ten (@.perfectten) has requested to follow you. Jisung (@.pwarkjisung) has requested to follow you. Jaemin (@.najaemin0813) has requested to follow you. jungwoo (@.jungwoogie) has requested to follow you.

There are fifteen other follow requests, you guess they’re all from all the NKT brothers. But two names stand out to you.

MARK (@.marklee99) has requested to follow you. YUTA (@.nakamotoyuta95) has requested to follow you.

You sit up in your bed abruptly and shoot a message to your sister.

You: sorry to bother you but what was the name of that frat guy in nkt that you hate?

She answers you pretty quickly. Yuta. Why??? DId you meet him?

You sigh and you’re about to press ‘decline’ to Yuta’s request, but instead your finger hovers over Mark’s request.

He just met a classmate for coffee, that doesn’t mean anything. Guys and girls were allowed to be friends. And besides, he’s not your boyfriend. He’s not your anything. You don’t know him, despite the fact that all the factoids from his frat brothers make you feel like you do.

You hit ‘accept.’

THE FOURTH PITCH: YUTA

You bring Yuqi and Minjung to the party Mark told you about. You had already asked Yuqi to do you a giant favor and keep an eye on Minjung while you went to hang out with Mark and she agreed emphatically.

As you enter the frat house, Yuqi pushes you a little. “Go get your man!” Minjung shoots you a thumbs-up.

You stumble around the frat a little, bumping through the mass of people jumping and grinding to whatever rap track is playing. You spot familiar faces but only give them small waves if they see you. You’re on a mission to see Mark Lee.

Taeyong and Ten are on bar duties tonight, and you catch Taeyong’s eye immediately. “What can I get you?”

“Just two beers.”

“Two?” he asks with a raised eyebrow as he turns to the fridge. He pulls out two cans and asks, “Who’s this one for?”

“Take your best guess.”

Taeyong grins at you and nods approvingly, saying, “Mark’s either out back or still in his room, so I’d check either one of those places.”

“Where’s his room?”

“Upstairs, down the hall and it’s the second door on the left. You can’t miss it, it has a big sign that says ‘Keep out, Lee Donghyuck.’ He’s one of our—”

“I’m familiar with him,” you say. Taeyong gives you a look that’s half-curious, half-worried and you just say, “I’ll explain another time.”

You decide to head to the yard first, where Yukhei is doing a kegstand aided by Johnny. You scan the crowd for Mark, but only see his friends. You’re about to head back inside when the door swings open behind you and you knock into someone.

“Sorry,” he says and when you look up, you see the face of Nakamoto Yuta. You two stare at each other for a few seconds before he says, “You remind me of someone.”

You bite back some scathing remark and coolly ask, “Do I? Who?”

“Some girl I knew a few years back.”

You say your sister’s name and Yuta only looks mildly surprised and replies, “Yeah, that’s her. Sisters?”

You cross your arms and nod. “We are. I know what you did to her.”

Then it’s your turn to be surprised when Yuta looks perplexed by your statement. “What I did to her?”

“Do you really screw so many girls over that you can’t even remember what I’m talking about?”

Yuta’s eyes narrow at you. “Don’t make assumptions, you don’t know me. I genuinely have no idea what you’re talking about. If anything, she fucked me over.”

“That’s ludicrous.”

Yuta rolls his eyes. “If you don’t want to believe me, you don’t have to, but I’m not going to stand here and argue with you about this.” He gives you another once over and says, “You’re the girl Mark likes, aren’t you?”

Despite your simmering anger, your heart skips a beat at the mention of Mark. You nod and Yuta says, “Johnny, Taeyong, and Donghyuck spoke pretty highly of you, but I’m finding all of it hard to believe right now.”

All you can do is scowl at him. Yuta sighs and says, “Look, Mark really, really likes you. It’s been kind of annoying, honestly, to hear about you twenty-four-seven in the house. My friends all said you were a good fit for Mark, and I trust their judgments given that this shitty interaction between us is from some misconception you have about what happened between me and your sister.”

“Where is this going, Yuta?”

“Mark’s one of my best friends. I don’t want whatever you think of me to color that.”

“It hasn’t.”

Yuta nods and motions back at the house. “Mark should be in his room. When you’re done making out with him or whatever, come find me and I’ll tell you what really happened between me and your sister.” He brushes past you, going to where there’s a crowd gathered around Johnny and Yukhei.

You go back inside. You’re unsettled by what Yuta told you. What could your sister have lied about and why would she? You walk up the stairs to the second floor of the frat, trying your best to remember Taeyong’s directions. A big sign that says, ‘Keep out, Lee Donghyuck.’

Mark’s door is open when you get there. Mark’s sitting on his bed and in his lap is your roommate, Sihyun.

As fucking cliché as it sounds, you drop the cans of beer. Mark’s head whips over at the sound and his eyes grow huge. He calls your name but you’re already bolting downstairs, cans forgotten. You pass Taeyong and Ten at the bar and don’t see the worried look they share with one another.

You find Yuqi and Minjung coming out of the bathroom together and you tell them, “I’m going to head back.”

“What? Why?” Minjung asks. “Did you talk to Mark?”

“No,” you say tersely. “He was preoccupied.”

Even over the music, you hear Mark yell your name again. Yuqi takes Minjung’s hand in hers and places her other one on your shoulder, navigating the three of you to the door.

You feel sick. You’re physically nauseous. You want to throw up.

Yuqi leads your trio in a power-walk-worthy pace, getting you back on campus in no time.

The back of your eyes are starting to sting with tears and your head is spinning. You ask Yuqi, “Can I crash at your dorm?”

Yuqi agrees without question and ushers you up to her dorm. She sits you down on her bed as the tears start to gather on your waterline.

“What happened?” Minjung asks softly. You tell them everything and as you do, it all makes sense to you now. This must have been some fucking sick, drawn-out joke planned by their frat — have one of the NKT brothers flirt with some unsuspecting girl and then crush her heart. There was probably a bet on it. Mark’s probably cashing in whatever reward he won, laughing with Sihyun as she sits on his lap.

Sihyun. You understand now why she was so nasty for the past week or so.

You wonder if Johnny, Taeyong, Donghyuck, and Yuta are all having some big fucking laugh with Mark and Sihyun at the frat.

Minjung looks as distressed as you feel and Yuqi looks like she’s about to punch the wall.

“This is what I get,” you say, “for trusting an NKT brother.”

INTERLUDE

You reject all the NKT brothers’ follow requests on Instagram. You block Mark on the app and when you go to block his number, you realize that you don’t have it, which somehow makes you sadder.

You feel stupid, both for trusting the NKT frat and falling for their fake-nice bullshit but also for falling for a guy you barely knew anything about. Maybe you felt like you knew him because of all the things his friends told you about him. Maybe you just convinced yourself that you did because you wanted to.

Maybe you were just a fool.

Two weeks later, Mingi and Yunho try to get you to come to an ATZ frat party as a way of detoxing from the NKT one, but you decline. You don’t want to risk seeing any of them and you think that you’re done with Greek life forever.

You’re basically living at Yuqi’s dorm, ever so grateful that her roommate, Miyeon, is one of the loveliest people you’ve ever met and letting you invade their space for the time being until your room swap request is approved. You put it in two days after the incident after hearing Sihyun, very loudly, brag to her friend about what a good kisser Mark Lee is. She also kept giving you smug, self-satisfied looks that made you yearn for the days of her chilling glares.

You hated to admit how much you missed Mark. Despite your limited interactions, he wormed his way into your heart. You thought you had something, something that would lead somewhere. You thought you were special but now, you scoff at the thought.

It’s kind of awkward in your leadership seminar class, given that Johnny’s in it. He tried to talk to you the week following the party but gave up after you iced him out. He respected your personal space as well, sitting as far from you as he could. At least he looks somewhat guilty — maybe there is a conscious in his icy frat boy heart after all.

You’re taking a walk in the park by campus, headphones on and music blasting. Midterms season hit you like a truck and it’s been a constant slog of work. On top of the residual effects of the incident, your mind needs a break.

You don’t hear who’s calling your name until someone grabs your shoulder and slides your headphones off. You scream as your fight-or-flight instinct kicks in, your arm shooting forward to punch whoever hit you. You knock them squarely in their own shoulder and when you get a good look at your assailant, you practically growl, “What the fucking hell?”

“Okay, I admit, not the smartest thing to do. Sorry.”

Fucking Nakamoto Yuta.

You don’t answer him and snatch your headphones from his hand, going to put them back on when he shouts, “Wait!”

“Christ, what do you want?”

“I want to talk.”

“Not happening.”

“You’re talking to me right now.”

You glare at him but you don’t leave. Yuta says, “I know you’re probably thinking this was some cruel prank or something like that. But I just want to let you know that it wasn’t.” When you don’t say anything, he continues, “After that night that first time you came to one of our parties, Mark couldn’t stop talking about his really pretty beer pong partner and how stupid he was for not getting your number or asking you out right there. He honestly wasn’t even sure if you liked him too, so some of us came up with a plan that, whenever we had the chance, we’d tell you about Mark and try to gauge how you felt about him. He didn’t know about it and, in hindsight, it was kind of dumb but we were just trying to help him go out with someone he genuinely really liked.”

You stare at your shoes and Yuta says, “None of that was fake. And I still don’t know what the fuck happened with Mark and that other girl but I know that he sure as hell doesn’t like her.”

Your next question throws Yuta off. “Can you tell me what actually happened between you and my sister?”

“Did you listen to anything I said before?”

“I did, but I need to know about what happened with her in order to decide if I trust you on this.”

He sighs, “Fair enough. The long and short of it is that I was a new pledge in NKT when I was a freshman and your sister was a junior in Kappa Delta. We talked a couple of times at parties, I thought she was nice but I wasn’t looking for anything serious since I had just broken up with my high school girlfriend before coming to college but I guess she read more into it. When I turned her down, she got really upset and said that I led her on and gaslit her and spread all these rumors about me being emotionally manipulative.” Yuta runs a hand down his face. “It was a hard freshman year for me and if it weren’t for the guys, I don’t think I would have gotten through it as successfully as I did. So that’s the story. Do you believe me?”

You consider what he said for a moment. Now that you think about it, your sister’s story always did seem to have gaping holes in it. Moreover, she was never really good at taking rejection, given that she was the favored child between the two of you.

“I do.”

Yuta looks a little shocked but he nods, sticking his hands in his pockets. “Okay.”

You stand there in silence for a beat longer and he says, “Will you go talk to Mark now? He’s kind of a wreck right now.”

“Right now?”

“If that works for you.”

You nod and you and Yuta walk out of the park and down towards Greek row. He lets you both into the NKT house. It’s weird to see it in the daytime but— “It’s much cleaner than I thought it would be.” There are even nice paintings and artwork hung up on the walls that seemed to have been hidden under the red and blue lights NKT lit their house in during parties.

Yuta snickers, “Yeah, Taeyong and Kun are kind of neat freaks so they make sure we clean after all parties.” He has you go ahead of him upstairs and you’re standing in front of Mark’s door.

You turn to Yuta. “I’m not sure—”

“Mark!” He bangs on the door.

“Yuta, go away! I’m not in the mood to cuddle.”

You shoot a glance at Yuta, who’s unbothered and undeterred and he says, “There’s a visitor for you.”

More quietly, Mark grumbles, “I swear, if it’s Sihyun again, I’m actually going to kill you for letting her in.”

“As if I would do that.” Yuta opens Mark’s door before Mark can and shoves you inside, slamming it behind him. Now, Mark’s room is what you think of when you think of a frat house. There’s clothes slung all over the furniture, shoes in weird places, and take-out containers covering the desk. And Mark looks… rough. He’s still in his pajamas and it seems like hasn’t shaved in the past two weeks, if the five-o’clock shadow was anything to go off of.

Mark stares at you, as if he can’t believe you’re there and the rawness of his expression breaks your heart a little. He notices you looking around the room and says weakly, “I would have tidied up if I knew I had a guest. Not that I think you’re judging me or anything. And not that I have a ton of guests that need me to tidy up, it’s mostly just friends of mine who know how messy frat houses can get and—”

“It’s okay, Mark.”

His mouth snaps shut and he says, “I’m so sorry about the party a few weeks ago.”

You lean against his door and cross your arms. “I just need to know, Mark. All your friends kept hyping you up to me, Yuta even told me flat out that you liked me. I need to know if that was real, if any of it was real.”

“It was all real,” Mark says. “Everything I felt—feel—for you is real. I’ve honestly never felt this way since, well, this is the first time, really. I know we don’t know each other well, but I know there’s something here. A connection.” He looks at you with those dark, doe-eyes and says, “I really like you.”

You bite your lip. “And what about Sihyun? What was that about?”

“Jeez,” Mark groans, dragging a hand through his hair. “I’ve met her a few times at parties, she was always kind of touchy but I guess… I didn’t really think it would go anywhere. Then, she invited me to coffee with her — that’s the friend I was meeting when I ran into you — and I think she read into it a lot. And there was the party and I was in my room getting ready to— well, it doesn’t matter — but I was in my room and she comes in and tell me that someone spilled their drink on her dress and because I was the only one she really knew well at the party, she wanted to know if she could borrow something and when I said yes, she sort of climbed on top of me and told me she liked me and then you walked in and… and you ran off and I pushed her off and tried to go after you—”

“Right,” you say. You know the rest of the story. “So, you’re not into Sihyun.”

Mark shakes his head. “I never was and especially not now.” He makes a face and you laugh a little. Mark relaxes and laughs with you too, and you remember how much you like his laugh.

“What were you getting ready to do in your room?” you ask.

“Sorry?”

“You said that you were still in your room, getting ready to do something, when Sihyun walked in. What was it?”

“Oh.” Mark blushes a little. “I was going to ask you on a date. I was going to ask if you wanted to go to the restaurant a few blocks from here.”

“The one with the really good burgers?”

“Yeah, that one.”

You check your phone time and say, “I could go for a burger now.”

Mark perks up. “Seriously?”

You smile at him. “Yeah.”

“Okay! Cool! Yeah, um—” Mark glances down at himself. “Let me just put on some real clothes and shave and then we can go?”

“Sounds perfect.” As you turn to wait outside the door, you say, “Mark?”

“Yeah?”

“I really like you too.”

SIX MONTHS LATER: YOUR QUESTION

“I’m sure you’re wondering why I’ve called you all here,” you say, eyeing the five men at the table.

“I’m on the edge of my seat,” Johnny says, sliding forward on his chair. You roll your eyes and Donghyuck and Taeyong laugh.

Yuta says, “I assume it has something to do with Mark.”

“Correct. Points to Yuta.”

“Hey! You didn’t say we were getting points,” Donghyuck says, pouting.

“Is it about him winning that writing competition?” Jaehyun asks.

“Exactly. See, Jaehyun, this is why you’re my favorite.” Jaehyun chuckles, the dimples in his cheeks deepening. Mark introduced you to Jaehyun a couple of weeks after you started dating and it’s safe to say that you became fast friends. Along with the other men in the room, Jaehyun is a self-proclaimed Mark expert, hence the group meeting.

“What present would he like?” you ask. “I’m trying to convey ‘Congrats on winning this competition’ and also ‘I love you.’”

The five of them stare at you and Taeyong grin, barely hiding the giddiness in his voice. “You’re going to tell him you love him?”

You nod and your friends cheer. Donghyuck says, “You could give Mark a rock and he’d love it because it’s you.”

“I’m not giving him a rock, Donghyuck.”

“What about a nice journal or something like that?” Johnny suggests.

“That’s an idea, but I want to make it special.”

Everyone is quiet for a minute but then Yuta says, “I have the perfect idea.”

Mark holds your hand as you stroll through the park after having a nice dinner at the same restaurant you had your first date. “Can we sit?” you ask him, pointing at the bench.

“Sure!”

The two of you take a seat and you turn to him, saying, “I want to say again how proud of you I am for winning that competition.”

Mark waves you off. “Babe, I already told you it’s not that big a deal.”

“Baby, it’s one of the most competitive competitions out there!” Mark flushes with embarrassment and you laugh, leaning over to kiss him. He cups your cheek and pulls you closer, and you want to stay like that forever but you reluctantly pull away to continue speaking. “I got you something.”

Mark’s eyes widen. “You didn’t have to!”

“I wanted to.” You reach into your bag and pull out his present, wrapped into brown paper and tried neatly with string.

Mark gingerly unties it and gawks at the notebook. “This is real leather,” he says, running his hand over the cover. He looks at you worriedly. “This must have cost you so much! You really didn’t have to—”

“I told you that I wanted to and you deserve it. Open it up.”

Mark opens it and reads the inscription you got printed inside.

My dearest, Mark, Congratulations on winning the writing competition! After many sleepless nights, your hard work paid and I’m so proud of you. You work hard every day to do your best every day, whether it be at school or at work or for us, you do everything with all of yourself and it’s one of the many, many things that I love about you.

Our start was definitely unconventional but even through that, the connection we felt was still stronger than whatever threatened to sever it. It’s been six months since we started dating and I couldn’t be happier. Every day, I wake up and am thankful for you.

I’ll write it here first before I say it: I love you, Mark Lee.

His mouth lifts into a grin and he looks up at you with sparkling eyes. You say to him, “I love you, Mark Lee.”

He ghosts his fingers over the same words in print. Then, he leans close to you and softly and shyly murmurs, “I love you too.”

#mark lee x reader #mark x reader #nct x reader #nct 127 x reader #nct dream x reader #nct u x reader #nct mark x reader #mark lee #nct #nct 127 #nct dream #nct u #nct imagines #nct fic #nct scenario #nct 127 fic #nct frat au #nct frat

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birdofmay · 1 year

Text

I just saw one of those "autism isn't linear, it's a spectrum" posts again and one picture was that how much the traits are pronounced could look like this:

[ID: two golden circles filled with the spectral colours. There are five white dots in each circle, each for one of the five categories: "sensory", "language", "executive function", "motor skills", and "perception". One dot is connected with its neighbouring dot by a black line, making it a simple polygon. In the first circle, it's almost a triangle, in the second circle it's a pentagon. Unfortunately my maths isn't good enough to tell you the name of the pentagon, but the bottom and the right side appear to be of equal length. /end ID]

And yeah, exactly, to use the outdated terms "high functioning" and "low functioning" - this individual here would be considered high functioning. Some traits are very pronounced and in fact very disabling. That's why "high functioning" dismisses the struggles of those autistics.

But they are considered high functioning because there are many traits that aren't that pronounced.

To illustrate that, this here would be someone considered low functioning:

[ID: The circle from above, but now there's a black line subsequently drawn within the circle, almost bordering the golden line. There are no white dots, but just imagine that the dots are on the outer edges, meaning that the traits are very pronounced. /end ID]

And you do see the difference, right? Every trait is very pronounced, very disabling, there's nothing that's not on the outer edges.

Sure, low functioning doesn't make sense when it's applied casually to every autistic with intellectual disability, or when it's applied to everyone who has some traits that aren't very pronounced - and unfortunately that was the case way too often.

But I just wanted to illustrate "severity" to you.

This is why I was diagnosed with "severe autism", because none of my traits are "weak" enough to compensate for the pronounced traits.

I don't like functioning labels either, I especially think that high functioning is very harmful if it's applied to an individual by others because it ignores that many of those autistics still have needs that need to be met and still struggle and (often) still in fact are disabled.

But you do see the difference, right?

My language skills got better over time (as you can read), but I still can't speak. My motor skills got better over time, but I still need people to help me with BADLs. My perception got better recently - I now sometimes hear when people call my name. But everything else? My perception is still shit.

That's the difference. That's why "high functioning" dismisses struggles but at the same time definitely is different from people diagnosed with severe autism. You can't even compare your bad days with our good days. Our life is completely different because we don't have those "weak traits" in the circle that you have.

Right.

And we definitely need to talk about the "neither nor" category of medium functioning and medium support needs, but that's for another day. This autism acceptance month maybe 😁

#long post #me trying to be informative

984 notes · View notes

itsmealaiah · 5 months

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Heyy could u do one where 2016 bill and y/n are on vacation with the band and they are best friends but they both get turned on?? tyy I love your writing

after his lil "photoshoot" in Bali, i'm so excited about this req! ❤️ 🫶

You drive me absolutely mad

God I wanted to get more done BUT I COULDN'T

thank you for the request love 🤭 so hot fr

hope this is good! tags/ warnings: hard-on, p in v, fingering, head (both), bill being hot, begging, cursing, screaming. MDNI ⚠️

Synopsis: with your little tiny bikini barely covering your chest and bottom, it drives bill completely insane, tearing you away from the beach where you were spending the day.

Bill's POV:

The warm sand pressed against my bare chest as I stared out at the ocean, the salty air filling my lungs. It had been a long, tiring year with the band, constant touring, recording, and the relentless attention from fans. I needed a break, a real one. That's why I brought her with me on this vacation.

She lay on her stomach a few feet away, her petite, curvy figure hidden beneath a tiny, blue bikini. The bottoms barely covered her hips, the sides revealing just enough of her ass to drive me wild. The top cut into her flesh above her breasts, leaving her stomach, back, and shoulders bared. It was enough to drive any man insane.

I sat up, stretching my arms above my head as I let out a sigh, watching her. The sun gleamed off her tan skin, her hair splayed out behind her, tickling the sand. She looked so peaceful, so content. And she was all mine for the next week.

I couldn't take my eyes off of her tiny bikini, the way it clung to her curves, revealing practically everything. My cock twitched in my shorts, growing harder and harder with each passing second. I licked my lips, already imagining what it would feel like to have her beneath me, her legs wrapped around my waist.

Without thinking, I called her name, my voice barely above a whisper. She looked over her shoulder at me, a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. "Yeah?" she asked, her voice lazy and sweet.

"Come here," I said, my voice rougher than I intended. She rose to her feet, making her way over to me, her steps slow and graceful. As she approached, I couldn't help but admire the way her hips swayed from side to side, drawing my attention to the tiny triangle of fabric covering her pussy.

I stood up, towering over her, and wrapped my arms around her waist. "You're teasing me so much, love," I groaned, burying my face in her neck. She giggled, her breath hot against my skin.

"Well, what do you want me to do?" she teased, wriggling her hips suggestively. "I'm just relaxing." I closed my eyes, trying to steady my racing heart. I couldn't take it anymore. I had to have her. "Come on," I growled, "let's get out of here."

I picked up our beach stuff and the towel, taking her hand in mine. She followed me, her steps slow and curious. "Where are we going?" she asked, her voice laced with anticipation.

I led her back to the hotel room, pulling her along by the hand. I couldn't wait to get her out of that tiny bikini and have her underneath me. Once we were inside, I slammed the door shut and pushed her against it, my body pressed against hers. "I need you," I growled into her neck. "Right now."

Her breath came out in little gasps as I took one of her wrists in my hand and pinned it above her head. "Oh, Bill," she moaned, arching her back. "Please."

I leaned in, kissing her neck, sucking on the tender skin. "Please what?" I whispered, my voice thick with desire. "Please take me inside you?"

She nodded frantically, her hips grinding against mine. "Yes," she breathed. "Please." I released her wrist and reached down to untie the tiny bikini bottoms, tossing them aside. Her bare pussy was finally revealed to me, and I groaned at the sight. I leaned in, taking her nipple into my mouth, sucking hard as I thrust my hips forward, pressing the head of my cock against her entrance. She cried out, arching her back further as I slowly pushed inside her.

Her tight, hot flesh engulfed me, squeezing me so tight I thought I might explode. "Fuck," I moaned, moving harder and faster, fucking her against the door. "You're so tight, so perfect." I released her breast, moving down to suck and nibble on the other, and she let out a keening cry.

Her nails dug into my shoulders as she arched her back, meeting my thrusts with her own, her hips moving in a rhythm that drove us both wild. I gripped her ass, squeezing as I buried myself deeper inside her, feeling her inner walls massage my cock with every move. "Oh God," she moaned, her voice raw and desperate. "Don't stop."

I didn't want to stop. I never wanted to stop. I wanted to lose myself in her, to feel her body move against mine until we were both reduced to nothing but pleasure and sweat. She was everything I'd ever wanted, everything I'd ever needed.

With one final thrust, I let go, my body shuddering as I came deep inside her. She cried out my name, her orgasm crashing over her in a wave of heat and pleasure. I held her tight against me, feeling her body quiver with each tremor that ran through her.

We stayed like that for a long moment, her breathing ragged and uneven, my heart still racing. I couldn't believe how right this felt, how perfect she was in my arms. I pressed my lips to her forehead, her cheek, her neck, drinking in the scent of her skin and the taste of her kiss. She looped her arms around my neck, holding on as if she never wanted to let go.

Finally, I pulled out of her, the wetness between us making a wet, sucking sound as I slid free. She looked up at me, her eyes glassy with desire, and I could see the question in them. "Come on," I said, reaching down to pick her up bridal-style. "Let's get comfortable."

I carried her to the bed, laying her down gently on the cool sheets. She stretched out beneath me, her legs spread, inviting me closer. I kissed her again, softly this time, my lips lingering on hers as I moved between her legs. I parted her wet folds with my fingers, exposing her swollen, sensitive clit. She arched her back, moaning into my mouth as I teased her, circling her bud with the tip of my finger.

Her hips bucked up off the bed, seeking more contact, and I obliged, thrusting my finger deeper inside her. She cried out, her nails digging into my shoulders as she came apart beneath me. I continued to work her, my other hand braced against her hip, feeling the tight muscles of her ass flex and release around my finger. She tasted so good, so sweet and salty, and I couldn't get enough.

I slid my finger from her pussy, bringing it up to her lips. "Suck," I whispered, and she opened her mouth, taking my finger into her mouth, sucking hungrily as she looked up at me with hooded eyes. I reached down between her legs again, finding her swollen clit and teasing it with my thumb. "That's it," I groaned, watching her body respond to my touch. "Feels good, right?."

She nodded, her eyes closed as she focused on the sensations I was creating. I continued to tease her, circling her clit with my thumb while using my other hand to spread her lips apart, exposing her sensitive entrance. "You're so wet," I murmured, leaning in to lick her, tasting her sweetness on my tongue. "God, I love the way you taste."

Her hips bucked up off the bed again, and I moved closer, thrusting my tongue deeper inside her. She cried out, her fingers tangled in my hair as she came hard around my mouth. I sucked and licked her, relishing the feel of her tight muscles contracting around my tongue, her juices coating my mouth. When she went limp, I moved up her body, kissing her deeply, tasting ourselves on each other's lips.

I propped myself up on my elbow, gazing down at her as she lay beneath me, her chest rising and falling with each ragged breath. She looked so beautiful, so satisfied. "That was…wow," she whispered, her voice still shaky. "I never thought…"

I smiled down at her and leaned in to kiss her again. "Neither did I," I said truthfully. "But I'm sure glad we did." I moved between her legs once more, parting her folds with my fingers. "How about this time, you take care of me?"

She propped herself up on her elbow, her gaze traveling the length of my cock. "You're sure?" she asked, her voice husky with desire. I nodded, my heart pounding in anticipation. Slowly, she lowered herself down, taking the tip of me into her mouth. Her lips were soft and wet, and I groaned as she began to bob her head up and down.

The feel of her warm, moist mouth engulfing me was unbelievable, and I couldn't help but thrust my hips forward, deepening the contact. She moaned around me, her hand wrapped around the base of my cock, guiding me in and out of her mouth. The sensation of her tongue swirling around the head of my dick was almost too much to bear.

I reached down to touch her hair, running my fingers through the silky strands as she continued to suck me deeper. Her eyes met mine, and I felt a shiver of desire race up my spine. She looked so fucking sexy like this, so confident and in control. I couldn't help but lose myself in the sensation, feeling my orgasm building inside me.

I moaned her name, my hips bucking involuntarily as I neared the edge. She must have sensed it too, because she increased the speed and pressure of her sucking, her tongue flicking against the head of my cock in a way that was driving me wild. I felt a sharp pulse of release coursing through my veins, and she took me all the way in, her throat working as she swallowed my climax.

She pulled back, her lips and mouth still wet with my essence as she looked up at me with a satisfied smile. "Better?"

A/n: love you all, take care!

requests open!

#bill kaulitz #itsmealaiah #bill kaulitz fanfic #tokio hotel x you #tokio hotel x reader #tokio hotel #bill kaulitz smut #bill kaulitz x reader #bill kaulitz x reader smut #bill kaulitz x you

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corriganatheart · 1 year

Note

When will you publish the next part of if he was mine can’t wait so excited

if he was MINE Pt. II/ João Félix x reader

Synopsis: You’re secretly in love with your best friend, who is in a toxic relationship.

Pairings: João Félix x fem!reader x Mbappé

Genre: One sided romance, and love triangle.

1 month after the World Cup

“Bro, come here. I need to spill something,” Achraf Hakimi says as soon as his best friend, Kylian Mbappé, enters the locker room. His other teammates, who pay no attention to the duo, were too busy talking and preparing for practice to care. It has also become customary for Hakimi to tell Mbappé the latest gossip, and most of the time, it is useless, so no one really cares about his “teas.” “If this is about babysitting your kids so you can have some quiet time with your wife, I reject,” Mbappé says immediately, knowing his best friend's motives. “No, you asshole, this one is even juicier,” Hakimi says and pulls his friend's arm before anyone can hear. Glaring at Neymar, who was curiously staring at the duo, Hakimi leaned into Mbappé’s ear, “Y/N has requested I give you her number,” he said while wiggling his eyebrows. Mbappé surprisedly yelped back, but he was grinning. “Seriously? Then what are you waiting for?” Mbappé excitedly says and shoves his phone to his friend. The others saw a shift in Mbappé’s mood and looked at each other, wondering what the gossip was about this time. “Do you know why they're not friends anymore?” Mbappé asked. Hakimi looks around the locker room and leans in, “they got into an argument about Magui again, and he’s back with her.” Mbappé stares at his friend in disbelief, it has been a almost a month since the drama started, and there were rumors that João has finally moved on, but now he’s potentially back with her. That can’t be good.

“What the heck are you guys talking about this time?” Neymar asked while approaching the duos, Messi following behind. “Oh, you know, the usual,” Hakimi sassily said, causing Neymar to roll his eyes. “You need us to babysit your kids again so you can get laid?” Hakimi angrily throws a water bottle at Neymar, causing everyone to laugh. “You guys are the worst kind of teammates!” Shrugging, Neymar waits for Mbappé to answer his previous question, but the man just shrugs. “You’ll know it later. It’s a surprise.”

1 week later

Breaking news: João Félix's best friend Y/N, who was once caught up in cheating allegations with him, has moved on. She was caught dining with PSG star Kylian Mbappé and was seen leaving the restaurant together, holding hands. Mbappé, best friend of teammate Hakimi, was seen cheering when Morocco beat Portugal in the quarter-final. Could Mbappé hang out with Y/N to add more fuel, or could this actually be a true romance?

2 minutes later

The Golden Boy: I can’t believe you would do something like that to spite me. I have been trying to talk to you for a month, and you pull this shit. Now my name is brought into the drama because you’re known as João Félix's best friend; leave me out of this drama. Good luck fucking that womanizer.

Incoming call from Kylian

“Hey,” you said, leaning up against your bed.

“Tired yet, bèbè?” He asked, and you could hear video games being played behind him and a couple of his friends snickering and teasing him in French.

“No. I saw the articles; I didn’t expect them to come out so soon,” you shrugged. Mbappé laughs, “that’s how fast the paparazzi are. Sometimes they know shit that even I didn’t know about myself.”

You smile and hear the background noise finally getting quieter, meaning he’s now in a secluded area. “I had fun tonight,” he says, causing you to smile. “Same; thanks for dinner.” Mbappé hums, and you hear him sigh a relief. “Look, I mean what I said about being interested in you, but I get it your feelings aren’t going to go right away. And I would be up for this relationship,” he says. You stay quiet and think about the potential of harming Kylian and João’s feelings. During the dinner, you talked about what happened because Hakimi had spilled the tea. And Mbappé understood that you’re doing this to get over João and make him jealous. At first, he was disappointed, but he likes you, so he volunteered to fake date you. “That’s going to be a lot of drama, you know. I don’t want you to be harassed for it.” Kylian didn’t say anything for a quick minute, but then he cleared his throat. “As embarrassing as it is to admit this, dating you would also clear up rumors about my sexuality. People have been saying weird shit that I’m into men, but let me tell you, I’m really into sleeping with Women.” You laughed because you’ve seen TikTok’s being made about that, and you wouldn’t even care if he was or wasn’t. But you had an idea that he’s pretty straight because so many women have complimented his style in the bedroom.

“You can always back up whenever you want,” you said. “I don’t want you going into something that will potentially harm your reputation.” Mbappé shrugs, obviously finding no harm in faking a relationship with you. “Same goes for you. If you feel like you’re falling for my charms, feel free to back out,” he teases. You laughed and thought of all the possible consequences that could happen. Mbappé is said to be a womanizer, but he has not made a move on you like you thought he would, but he is a flirt. If anything, people would assume you guys are just casual and wouldn’t be surprised it didn’t last. On the other hand, your friendship with João might never be the same. He was already upset that you were photographed with Mbappé, so imagine if you confirmed your relationship with him, you might never be best friends again. “Hey, ima let you get some sleep,” Mbappé says softly. You smile because his voice is just so charming, and if your heart didn’t belong to someone else, you would’ve folded immediately. “Thanks, Kylian, goodnight.”

Breaking News: João Félix and Magui Corceiro confirms to be back together. The duo took a short break after a cheating scandal but seemed happier than ever from the Instagram pictures that Magui posted.

Kylian: Fly out to watch us Saturday? 🥺

You: N meet your nosy ass friends? Lol

Kylian: you are bound to meet my circle anyways😏 we are dating remember?

You: “dating” I suppose I should be supporting my “bf”🤔

Kylian: awe you hurt my feelings with those quotation marks 😓 I got a t shirt for you btw🥰

You: 😲 is it Neymar’s?

Kylian: fuck no! you’re wearing my name

You: jk😝 ig I’ll see you Saturday then!

Kylian: okay bébé🙌🏼 I’ll book you a plane ticket, and you’re staying at my place. 😌

You: why the heck would I do that? 🫥

Kylian: because I am ur man. And besides it’s safer for you to stay with me. 😇

You: fine. but no funny business👀

Kylian: what funny business?🤔

You: don’t act all innocent Kylian.

Kylian: ahhh😱 Y/N! I am a child of god🙏🏻🛐. Why would you think I’ll do such a thing?😤

You: 😑…….🙄

Kylian: hahahahha promise no funny business. Unless you of course ask. I am a gentlemen, I would never say no to a lady😶

Kylian: hello???

Kylian: bébé come back!!

Kylian: alright fine ig u do have a life. See you Saturday love❤️

“Can you believe it?” Magui asked while zooming into the news article of Mbappé following you on Instagram. “They might actually be dating.”

João stares at what his girlfriend is referring to and immediately looks away when the photo of you and Mbappé holding hands appears again. Ever since you guys basically ended your friendship, he hasn’t been the same. Every day and night, he would think about what you said and the possibility of you being together. All these years, you’ve hidden those feelings, and looking back, it was pretty fucking obvious that you are in love with him.

João groans and lies back on the couch as his notification goes off. Ever since Magui posted the photo without his permission, he has been getting text and hate comments. Everyone thinks he’s a sore loser for getting back with his ex, but even he didn’t know they were back together until he woke up in bed with her. Last week when he finally decided to give up on speaking to you, he went out and drank with his friends without knowing that it was a setup and Magui was there. Everyone ended up taking shots, and the next thing he knew, he was in bed with Magui doing everything he could to get you out of his mind.

You were his best friend, everything he ever wanted in a friend. But the idea of dating you never crossed his mind because he did not want to lose you. João knew he was always attracted to you, but he shoved the thought deep inside his heart because he didn’t want to ruin the friendship. If he had known that you liked him for a while, maybe things would’ve been different; perhaps he would’ve considered it. But then he met Magui, and she became his world. She was everything he wanted in a girlfriend, but he still needed you. There were so many arguments in his relationship about you, but he couldn’t choose just one because you’re his best friend and she was his dream girl. But since you left him, his feelings have been very complicated, and he wasn’t sure. He has missed you more than ever, and even the idea of being with his dream girl wasn’t enough. He needed you, but he didn’t know how to tell you without hurting everyone else.

“Babe, I’m talking to you,” Magui whines, frustrated that her boyfriend has been drifting off lately. “Sorry, what did you say?” João asked. Magui frowns and rolls her eyes, “I asked if you knew she’s been sleeping with Kylian?” João just stared at her, wondering where she got the idea of you sleeping with Mbappé. He knew you were friends with Hakimi, but you’ve never mentioned it to him about Mbappé, and you tell him everything. “She’s not like that, so it has to be serious,” João says bluntly, the thought leaving a bad taste in his mouth. “Oh please, do you think Kylian Mbappé would want a girl like her?” Magui asked with disgust. João narrows his eyes, not liking how she is talking about you. “A girl like her?” João asked for clarification. “Yeah, you know, hoeing around footballers to be relevant,” Magui shrugs. João sits up and glares at his girlfriend, “like what you did when you were with me?” This causes Magui and himself to be shocked because he has never mentioned their past. When João forgives, he let go of the pain, because he doesn’t want confrontation, but he has had enough of her treating him like trash. “Honestly, I don’t fucking know why you cheated on me so many times. The idea never occurred to me once, and the fact that you did it so many times only shows how little you care about me and this relationship.” João aggressively stands up and grabs his jacket and car key. He then starts heading to the door, but Magui wraps her arms around his waist, hugging him. “You know how much I struggled because you keep having her around. Things will change because she’s not here anymore. You only need me. It’s me, you need and want. I love you so much, João; no one else but you.”

These were the words he had always wanted to hear from her. She was everything he wanted, but being treated like shit can only reach a specific limit, and he has reached it. But before he let her go forever, he needed to confirm something. João turns around, and without warning, he presses his lips on Magui’s. She accepted it with a moan, mouth savoring the way he lusted for her. She holds on to his t-shirt and starts backing up to the couch, wanting to dominate him. João let her, and the next thing she knew, he was on top of her, looking down at her, anger and confusion written all over his eyes. “You taste like shit. You don’t taste like the girl I fell in love with. I deserve better than you. Go find someone else to be your puppet because I am done,” he says disgustingly. She whimpers, but he doesn’t care; he gets off her and starts walking away, never looking back.

Saturday: PSG vs. Borussia Dortmund

Hakimi: Fuck you for not telling me that you were coming.

Y/N: Hello to you too. And it was a last min decision lol.

Hakimi: whatever. Anything happened last night at Kylian’s house? 😉

Y/N: no you sinful child. we slept like a baby.

Hakimi: whatever😒 anyways party at my place after the game.

Y/N: bruh u confident asf

Hakimi: bitch if I lose I’m not going to eat ice cream and cry. I’ll just party and drink in misery 🥳

Y/N: damn are you always this pleasant before your games?

Hakimi: my bad😬 I haven’t been laid for two weeks, so I’m in a pissing mood.

Y/N: I can tell. Since I’m in town, I’ll just babysit so you can have ur date night.

Hakimi: Fr? Awe you’re the best! I’ll make sure to dedicate a goal to u😉

Y/N: yeah whatever. Goodluck!

You join Hiba and her two sons in the VIP section. They’re sporting Hakimi’s number as you wear Mbappé’s t-shirt. Hiba had told you that Hakimi had told everyone you’re here to cheer for Mbappé, and the whole team has been teasing him. You’re sure they probably asked about João too and wondered if you guys are still friends. If anything, this was entertaining to them because Mbappé has never publicly brought a “girlfriend” around them.

“Look, it’s Jude Bellingham’s wife and their two twins!” Hiba said excitedly as she pointed at a really attractive lady with two adorable children. “Wow, they’re so cute,” you said in awe as you watched the little girl jump up and down, wearing her father’s shirt. The boy stood there like an adult with his head high, and he looked just like Bellingham. “They’re young, but they seem to be happy and have the perfect family,” Hiba says with a huge smile. “It doesn’t matter when you find the right person.” You mumbled. You then look at Jude Bellingham, who is staring at his wife and kids in awe. He looked so in love, and you hope one day, you’ll find someone that looks at you like you’re the most perfect thing in the world. (Reference to Jude Bellingham x reader “If I Should Stay”).

As you admire how Jude Bellingham looks at his wife and kids, you think of the chances you could have if you let go of this ridiculous feeling for João. Maybe you’ll find someone who loves and looks at you similarly. Maybe your Mr. Right is waiting for you while you chase after a guy that doesn’t want you. You smile sadly, and then your eyes drift to the PSG side to see Mbappé staring up at you. His eyes smile at you, and his mouth curves upward when you make eye contact. Your stomach twists, and your face heats up from his stare. You awkwardly wave, and he places four fingers on his lips and sends them your way. The crowd starts going wild, and you’re left stunned as Mbappé smirks and walks away.

Your phone was going off wildly as the news made it around that you’re attending PSG’s game and are supporting Mbappé. Everyone has concluded that you two made it official because, on his first goal, he dedicated it to you by sending a heart your way after he scored. The crowd obviously went wild, and people were telling one another the news, and you’re now labeled as Kylian Mbappé’s girlfriend. Even though this is fake, you couldn’t help but feel drawn to him. He was flirtatious and knew what he was doing. It almost felt real, and for a moment, you forgot the purpose of faking a relationship with him.

“You know he’s down bad for you, right?” Hiba asked while staring at you. You awkwardly chuckle and shake your head, “it’s nothing that serious,” you mumble. Hiba smiles and looks back at the field. “I have known Kylian for years, and he has never brought a woman around us. If he is showing you off for the world to see, it’s obvious he wants you and wants to tell everybody to back off.” You stare at Mbappé, dumbfounded about what Hiba just said. You’ve known the man briefly, but you realize he has known you for years because of Hakimi. Everything Hakimi knows about you has been passed on to Mbappé, who later took an interest in you. For someone whose always hyper and happy, he is one of the most mysterious people you’ve ever met. From pursuing you secretly to fake dating you, he has a side of him you don’t know but want to know.

“You enjoyed the game, bébé?” He asked as soon as you entered the PSG waiting room. “Yeah, it was good. Congratulations,” you said and hugged him. He gladly accepted it, causing his friends to snicker and whistle in the back. “Kylian, you going to introduce?” Neymar asked with a smirk. Mbappé glares at him, “this is my girl, Y/N.” Your face once again heats up from the sound of that. “Cute name for a pretty girl,” Neymar says and shakes your hand. “Mbappé’s a lucky guy.” You giggle, causing Mbappé to glare at you and Neymar; it was pretty cute seeing him jealous. “That’s enough,” Mbappé warns, causing Neymar to shrug and back off. “Oh, come on, be mature,” Neymar says while rolling his eyes. Ignoring Neymar’s comment, Mbappé quickly grabs his stuff, along with his car key. “Let’s go. I got some plans for us.”

“You assholes, don’t forget about the after-party!” Hakimi calls after you and Mbappé as you guys rush out of the room. “Use protection!” You heard someone else shout, causing Mbappé to laugh and you to blush. Like expected, a couple of paparazzi were already waiting outside to catch a glimpse of you and Mbappé. Mbappé and a couple of his security guided you to his car; many people were already snapping photos and screaming their questions.

Y/N how do you feel about João Félix and Magui getting back together?

When did you and Mbappé meet?

Are you guys official?

How do you feel about João Félix unfollowing Magui?

You entered the passenger seat, staring at the person who shouted that question. It has been a while since you’ve been on social media, so you haven’t heard the news of João unfollowing Magui. If it were true, you would be shocked because that is a step to moving on, and he has never taken that step. But then what would be of your relationship with him? Would you guys be friends again? And what would happen to your fake relationship with Kylian? Would you guys have to end it faster than expected?

“You good?” Mbappé asked while staring at you. You smile and him and shake off the weird feelings. “Yeah, just a bit overwhelmed,” you smiled. Mbappé tucks a strand of hair behind your ears, “you looked great, by the way. How was your first time experiencing being a WAG?” He grins while pulling out of the parking lot. You chuckle; being a girlfriend of a high-profile sportsman was better than you expected. Besides sitting in a VIP seat, the experience of watching someone you are with play the sport they love was unique. Of course, this experience wasn’t new; you’ve been to a lot of João’s game and has supported him, but you were never the person to whom he dedicated his goals. “Hey, don’t let them get to you. I know exactly what to cheer you up!”

“Kylian. Omg, when did you do this?” You asked while looking at the setup in front of you. It was beautiful. He has a huge comfortable couch on his balcony with pillows and blankets laid out. A coffee table was placed on the foot of the sofa, with all your favorite snacks and drinks. Five feet from the couch stands a movie theater screen. Candles were light and lined up on the edge of his balcony, and the Eiffel Tower could be seen from his balcony. It was incredibly beautiful.

“Achraf parties always end up with everyone passing out, so I wanted us to spend time together,” Mbappé says while guiding you to the couch. You still admired how beautiful everything looked; you almost wanted to cry because of his effort. “Come on, I don’t want you getting cold,” he says, and you lay on the couch as he lays next to you and covers the both of you with a warm blanket. The movie starts, but you guys don’t focus; both of you want to get to know one another on a deeper level. “Tell me about you, Y/N,” he says while grabbing the bucket of popcorn. “Tell me things people don’t know.”

“Are you asking for my favorite color?” You laughed, causing him to smile softly. “I will take whatever you give me,” he says, and you didn’t miss your heart jumping. No wonder people call him a womanizer; he knows exactly what to say. “Well, people don’t know that I’m secretly in love with my best friend…former best friend,” you said. Mbappé nods, waiting for you to continue. “Ahum, people don’t know that I’m insecure about being labeled as João Félix's best friend or now Kylian Mbappé’s girlfriend.” Mbappé stares at you, not looking the slightest offended by what you just said. “And people don’t know that I have a very important position at my job. I’m not just a pretty face.”

The movie plays in the background as you continue to tell Mbappé about yourself, even things that João might now even know, and not once do you think about the drama that is occurring in your life. “And yeah, that’s how Magui ended up hating me.” Mbappé watches you fidget with your fingers and bite your lips, his heart pounding from your effect on him. “Why do you like him so much? Why do you….love him,” he asked seriously. You glance at the screen and then back to Mbappé, “because he was the only person I ever had.”

Mbappé stares at your uncomfortable form, and he softly rubs his thumb across your cheeks. “I wish I have met you earlier,” he says softly. “Maybe then, I would be an option.” You gulp, realizing he’s referring to being with you without a reason. You’ve known he’s interested in you, but you thought it was just an interest that would disappear after spending some time with you. “If you were this sweet to a fake girlfriend, I can’t imagine how you would be with a real one,” you muttered. Mbappé smiles and gently places a kiss on your forehead. “Why don’t you find out?”

You stare at him; he carefully examines your face, waiting for you to say something. Mbappé asks you to be his real girlfriend, but what about João? Your history with him hasn’t been resolved yet, and after hearing that he has unfollowed and dumped his girlfriend, things might change. Would he apologize and ask to be friends again? Your feelings for him are still there, and it wouldn’t be fair for Mbappé. You needed to resolve things with João first before thinking of another man. But the way Mbappé was looking at you only makes you want to forget about João and leave everything behind. Clenching your pants, you slowly lean forward while staring at his lips. Mbappé does the same, and just when you guys are inches apart, your phone rings.

You awkwardly back up and reach for your phone. Looking at the user, your heart starts beating fast. Mbappé glares at the username, knowing who “The Golden Boy” is. Without meeting his eyes, you answer the phone. “Hello?” You asked. “Y/N, I need you,” João says; your heart beats fast because he sounds broken like he just finished crying. “Fuck I miss you so much; I need you right now, please,” he begs. Because you were used to responding quickly to his pleas, you immediately jumped up from the couch and started walking away when Mbappé grabbed your wrist. “Stay,” he says, and there’s pleading in his eyes. Your voice was stuck in your throat, and you listened to João’s pleas for you to be there for him and Mbappé’s eyes begging for you to stay. “I’m sorry,” you mumbled and pulled your hands away before exiting the balcony, leaving Mbappé behind.

Getting into the taxi, you glare up at Mbappé’s home, the balcony now dark. He didn’t come down when you hurriedly packed your belongings and booked the earliest flight home. You feel guilty, of course, but you’ve known this man for a short time, and you’ve known João your whole life. Although your friendship wasn’t perfect, he was there for you when you needed him, and you weren’t ready to let that go. With a heavy heart, you look away from Kylian Mbappé’s place and look forward to your journey home.

2 weeks later

Breaking news: Kylian Mbappé and Y/N officially call it quits after only a few weeks of dating. Many fans were suspicious of their relationship and suspected they were only short-term. Mbappé is now only focusing on his career and has no interest in starting a new relationship, whereas Y/N has reconciled her friendship with João Félix, and many fans think that might be the reason for the breakup.

Part III is coming! Are we team João Félix or team Kylian Mbappé?

Part III

@poopyloofy @simpingmyassoff @smiley-roos @untitled23430 @ts1mp0ne @forevernightmare @sad1esgf @kakuchosbff

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softhairedhotch · 7 months

Text

this is a bit more of a specific one but hope y'all enjoy <33 comfortember day four: warmth

aaron hotchner x gender neutral reader (reader is the same height/taller than aaron in this!) you and aaron share each other's clothes. word count: 1.1k warnings/content: pet names, fluff, wearing each other's clothes, established relationship, all that cute stuff.

comfortember masterlist here! also on ao3.

stolen clothes

One day, when Aaron is out on a case in a colder state and you're stuck in the office as usual, he sends you a picture that has you grinning like a fool. It's a mirror selfie of him wearing a quarter zip he bought you a few months back, one specifically bought so that you'd stop stealing his ones out of his go-bag when it gets slightly colder. You laugh at the irony and admire the picture–it's a dark grey and fits him perfectly, making him look even more devastatingly handsome, something you didn’t think was possible. You save the photo and message him back, telling him how handsome and pretty he is wearing your clothes and smiling to yourself knowing he’s blushing on the other side of the screen.

If it weren't for him sending you the picture, you'd have found out he was wearing it eventually anyway. An hour or so later as you sit on your lunch break, your phone buzzes with a notification from a group chat you have with Emily, JJ, Penelope, and Derek.

Hot(ch) Gossip

JJ: Is Hotch wearing a new quarter zip?

Penny: is he?

Penny: send pic

Penny: now

Derek: Baby girl, it's just a quarter zip. What's the fuss?

Em: It's a new one!

Em: He only has like 3 outfits!

JJ: She's right.

You: it's mine

Derek: What? How do you know?

You: he sent me a pic of him wearing it :)

Derek: Ew!

You: he had the rest of his clothes on, derek!

Derek: Oh

Derek: Well that's cute

Derek: I guess

Penny: awwwwww it is!!!! squeeeeee!!!

Penny: send a pic!!!

[Emily attached a photo.]

You: oh look at him!!

Penny: he's so cute in your clothes!! ahhhhh!!!

You: send me more pics whenever you can ;)

Derek: Oh, hell nah.

[Derek left the chat.]

Penny: we've traumatised him

You: nah, he's just too afraid to admit he finds aaron just as attractive as i do. he's jealousss

Penny: LOVE TRIANGLE LOVE TRIANGLE LOVE TRIANGLE

read by everyone.

You laugh at the messages and download the picture of Aaron to keep for later, admiring him for a second before sitting back at your desk with a big smile on your face.

After that, the team–mainly Emily and Penelope, although Dave gets in on the action occasionally–love to send you candid photos of Aaron wearing your clothes when on a case. It’s their daily entertainment. You’d let him know, of course, if it wasn’t for the fact he looks so cute in all the pictures, completely unaware and looking grumpy in your clothes, and making your entire day.

A few weeks later when you’re in the kitchen making dinner for you and Jack, your phone vibrates with a message. Glancing at it, you find yourself smiling immediately at the sight of Aaron’s name. He’s sent a picture attachment and you already know it’s going to be a picture of his bed as proof that he’s getting some much-needed sleep while out on a case.

However, to your surprise (and pure joy), it’s a picture of him tucked into bed with his pillows propped up behind him and covers bunched up under his chin. He looks adorable. Upon closer inspection, you realise that it looks like he’s wearing one of the old shirts you wear to bed, and you laugh as you realise you didn’t lose it like you thought you did. You send him a message asking if it’s your shirt and he tells you it is, promising to send another picture.

Almost five minutes later, your phone buzzes in your hand and you feel the butterflies erupt in your stomach at the sight of him. He’s smiling awkwardly into the camera, the phone held at an odd angle above his head, but the shirt is more visible and it’s most definitely yours and, of course, he looks as beautiful as ever. You smile and decide to reply with a picture of yourself to show that you’re also wearing one of his shirts.

He types for a few moments before giving up and deciding to call you instead. “Hello.”

“You’re supposed to be going to sleep, Mister.”

“I know,” he replies, a smile obvious in his voice. “But I wanted to hear from you.”

“Good,” you grin, moving the pan off the hob and turning the heat completely off, “because I wanted to hear from you, too.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah… So. When did you decide to steal my shirt?”

Aaron laughs over the phone and your chest grows tight. “It wasn’t planned, I promise. But when I was repacking my bag, it was just there on the side and… Yeah. It smelled of you and I couldn’t help myself.”

“You’re lucky you’re cute, sweetheart, because I was going insane trying to find that shirt earlier. It was there on the bed this morning and then when I checked a few hours later, it was gone!”

“Sorry, I felt like being a bit of a thief today. Don’t let my team know, they’ll arrest me.”

You let out a loud laugh at that. “God forbid they find out you stole your partner’s shirt. I better not get a picture of you in a jail cell, Hotchner.”

“What if I was still wearing your shirt in the picture?”

“Hm… maybe I do wanna see it, then.”

He laughs alongside you before asking about your day and how Jack’s been.

A few days later when Aaron is home and the two of you are getting ready for bed, he grabs one of his pyjama shirts from his go-bag. You reach out to stop him, giving him a sweet smile. “What?” He asks, cocking an eyebrow. “You want me to sleep shirtless? I would but it’s pretty cold.”

“No,” you laugh, shaking your head. “Well… yes. But no, I want you to wear this.” You hand him the shirt you wore to bed last night with a smile. “I think you’ll look cute in it.”

He smiles at you and takes it from your hand, giving you his shirt in exchange. “Then you better wear this one. Wanna see you wear it.”

You take it from his hand and throw it on, feeling giddy as the smell of him washes over you. He looks over you fondly before throwing on your shirt and taking the few steps between you to wrap you up in a hug. You bury your face into his shoulder as he presses a soft kiss to your cheek, holding you for a few moments longer before gently tugging you into bed. He rests his head on your chest and sighs, feeling content. Pressing a soft kiss to the top of his head, you wrap your arms around him and revel in the warmth of his firm body against yours.

The two of you fall asleep like that, in each other's clothes, feeling safe and warm and loved.

tag list: @criminalskies @hotchs-big-hands @ssahotchnerr @citrusiove @mrs-ssa-hotch

#love you guys #hope you enjoy #aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner x gender neutral reader #aaron hotchner fanfiction #comfortember #comfortember 2023 #writing events #cas writes

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torialefay · 5 months

Text

☀️ Everyday Idol 🌙 (Chapter 1)

✨ possible bangchan x reader (f), possible jungkook x reader (f); (however, this is a bangchan-focused fic)

✨ friends to lovers? possible love triangle? future angst and smut??? definitely fluff.

✨ summary: JYP Entertainment launches a new show and y/n somehow gets recruited. Even though she doesn’t particularly care about the outcome of the show, she does particularly care about one of the artists she met: Chris from Stray Kids. Does Chris feel the same or will a potential relationship with one of his friends overcome what y/n feels for him?

✨ author’s notes: this is my first ever post, yay! i know i have a lot to improve on, so bear with me as i figure out all of the fun stuff. leaving this as a stand alone for now until i find out if anyone is interested in this becoming a series. any feedback is super helpful! taking suggestions as well 💜

✨ warnings: cursing from time to time. gets a little emotional towards the middle. that should be about it hehe.

“Holy shit.” You stared down at your phone. A notification highlighted in tones of pink, yellow, and purple clued you into the fact quickly that it had been an Instagram notification. But the words you were reading seemed to not register.

Message request from abcedfghi__lmnopqrstuvwxyz.

Wait, hold up. That’s weird. There’s no way this is his real account… Hold on.

You hurriedly clicked on the notification to open the app. It brought up a white screen with a short message surrounded by the grey Instagram text bubble.

Hey! I was wondering if you’d want to hang out sometime before you go back? We can do whatever you want. I’d just like to see you again.

You hurriedly screened your eyes back to the top of the page. In bold letters: JungKook. Right underneath, the username sprawled again: abcdefghi__lmnopqrstuvwxyz.

You clicked the name and went to their profile. As bright as the sky and as plain as day, a blue checkmark next to the username. What the fuck?! There’s no way. You felt your heart start to race and your eyes shot up, looking to see who was around. You went back to the message, clicked again, and sure enough, it took you back to the same verified account. You felt your breathing start to quicken and the nerves set in. The nerves- what were they from? Excitement? Nervousness? Confusion? A mixture of them all?

“Oh God, what do I do?” You whispered to yourself while shooting your head up. Skittish all of a sudden, you examined your surroundings. You had been in the JYPE dance practice room. Light wood-colored vinyl flooring laid underneath your feet, while red walls surrounded you all the way to the ceiling, where a huge JYPE logo was attached and acted as the bright overhead lighting. You still aren’t really sure how you ended up here. Well, I guess you were, but you still couldn’t believe it. One minute, you were on a 4-week vacation to Korea, and the next, you were here- standing in a practice room for JYP Entertainment.

Merely 2 weeks ago, you had been walking along one of the busiest streets in downtown Seoul with your friend Anna. The two of you had been inseparable for the past 2 years, meeting each other in medical school in the States and relying on each other and your friend group to get you through every waking moment of it. From exam study sessions to making sure the other had woken up in time to make it to the lab, you wouldn’t find one of you without the other. Which is why you were extremely thankful that both you AND Anna were politely paused on the side of the street, being offered the opportunity of a lifetime. JYP Entertainment planned to make a new show, Everyday Idol. The concept of the show was to recruit everyday people- people in various different jobs with various different lives- to spend one week as a JYP trainee. After 2 or 3 weeks, a performance would be held. It was speculated even that JYP himself would be at the finale to make evaluations and possibly ask a select few to continue their training at JYPE. That part of it is still hearsay. No one knows what happens after the final evaluation, but it didn’t matter to you anyways. Both you and Anna had another calling- one in the medical field. You weren’t here to become an idol. You weren’t even here because you particularly liked singing and dancing. You were just here for the experience of it all… and maybe also a little because you had heard that JYP had some very handsome artists who would be involved in the training, judging, and making of the show. You told yourself that was just a bonus, but let’s be honest, it was really the deciding factor of whether you would go through with this or not. You never expected though to meet Jungkook as a friend of one of the JYP artists, but again, that was also just a bonus.

So now, here you stood. A confused mess, darting eyes across the JYPE practice room that you had finally started to feel comfortable with. One final glance at your phone. Where was Anna? You had to tell someone, right? Talk to someone before you did or said anything crazy. Flights of ideas ran through your head. You started to walk toward the exit door as fast as you possibly could without anyone thinking there was something seriously wrong. Anna had to be around here somewhere. At the cafeteria, more than likely. You two had gotten separated a short while ago, but you were sure that’s where she’d be. You paced hurriedly down the long corridor and down the 2 flights of stairs to the level holding the cafeteria. Upon getting there, a quick scouring over the room showed the strawberry blond waves of Anna’s head at a long table. She was seated at the end next to Felix. Felix was a member of Stray Kids and was also Anna’s mentor throughout her week of being a trainee. The 3 of you, well 4 really (counting your own mentor, Changbin) had gotten really close. You were introduced to the other Stray Kids members as well, as you had all gone out for drinks. Some members you got closer to than others. Like Chris for example. You felt so lucky to have really cool and down to earth guys to help you along your way. They were so much fun and made hard things seem a lot easier. But no matter how awesome they were, they weren’t Anna. You zoned in on her and quickly made your way over.

“I am quite literally not doing that,” you heard Anna say, while side-eyeing Felix.

“But think about how memorable it would be. They would never forget you at least. And as your mentor, it is my job to make you stand out during the finale. I mean, just think about it,” Felix was wide-eyed, making a rainbow motion with one hand across the sky.

You interrupted the conversation by arriving at the table. “What are we thinking about?” You asked, with a faint panic sound in your voice and out of breath.

Anna just rolled her eyes again. “Go on,” she said, head dipping down to motion toward Felix.

A huge grin spread across Felix’s face. You could tell he was about to break character and start laughing any second now. “Well, I was thinkinggg, you know since you guys are gonna be doing ‘Charmer’ for your group performance, that Anna and maybe some others should draw on some fake abs since we have to show ours too.” Felix laughed and waited for your expression. You relaxed into the joke, thinking about how iconic it really would be.

An annoyed smile crept across your mouth. Finally giving an eye roll of your own, you responded, “As much as I do think it is a main selling point of the performance… yeah, I’m with Anna. No way in hell I’m doing that.” You looked at Felix with raised eyebrows and laughed. Thinking about it, Felix really is such a cool guy. I’m glad he’s Anna’s mentor, and now, a friend.

“Touché,” he grinned and looked down. Damn y/n, hold up. You almost forgot you’re supposed to be panicking right now.

“Anna, I need you for just a sec,” you blurted out quickly, while grabbing her by the arm and elbow at the same time. She stood up swiftly and you rushed a few steps to the next table over. Although it was a long table, no one else was sitting there, and you thought it would be fine. You hurriedly plopped down into the seat, pulling her with you. “Look who the fuck just messaged me,” you excitedly tried to keep your voice down.

Anna took the phone and focused on it, squinting her eyes. Again, you could tell that she was clicking the account’s username and icon. Then re-reading the message, back and forth, back and forth again. You saw her expression go from confusion to utter shock, jaw dropping open. She set the phone down face up. “Holy shit y/n!!!” she all but squeeled. It was loud, and you could tell people were now looking your way.

“Shhh,” you scolded her, bringing both of your heads down closer to the table and establishing a low tone. “No one can know. I do NOT want this getting out, okay?” You paused and felt your heart skip a beat. “Anna, I don’t know what to do.”

“Don’t know what to do?!” She borderline yelled yet again, raising her body up in the air with her proclamation.

“Anna!” You hush-yelled at her, bringing her body back down again. “Please, for the love of God, we have to be quiet. No, I don’t know what to do.”

“Bitchhh, message him back and say ‘hell yes!!!’. If you don’t, I swear I will.” You could tell she was so excited for you and she could not keep the cheesiest smile from spreading ear to ear across her face. Her eyes were lit up.

“I just don’t understand,” you spoke quietly. “He was literally such an asshole when I met him. Just arrogant and rude. Thinks he’s hot shit. He made me feel like I was the most irrelevant person ever. Like why is he even messaging me? I genuinely do not understand.” You had only met Jungkook a couple of days prior, through your new friend Chris from Stray Kids. They had been hanging out in Chris’ living room when you had gone to pick something up from Changbin. The interaction between the two of you was brief, but long enough for you to know that Jungkook was not your cup of tea. Now Chris on the other hand… Chris was something else. Chris was the exact opposite of Jungkook. The fact that they could even hang out in the same crowd baffled you. You could think of 100 ways to describe Chris, but no single word felt like it did him justice. On second thought, ‘perfect’ might do it. Did you hope that HE would be the one sending you a message wanting to hang out? Maybe. Did you have somewhat of a crush on him? DEFINITELY maybe. Okay, definitely. But you didn’t mean to. And how you ended up with that conclusion in the first place… Well, it’s a long story:

The way that JYPE had Everyday Idol set up, you would start preparing for the show 1 week before the actual filming and training process started. You had to come to the company building everyday to go over contracts, meet your mentors, tour the buildings, all of that good stuff. Although that was only an orientation week, it was one that was very important. You got to meet several artists and make so many connections. Since both your and Anna’s mentors were from Stray Kids, naturally, you met the other members and became friends with them as well. They were a super friendly group of guys and made you feel much more comfortable about going through this whole process. Each member had their own quirks, which you learned at a group dinner where every member came with their mentee. Some much-needed drinks were downed that night, with resultant memories made. One thing you learned for sure- Koreans LOVED their drinking games, and they really did bring people closer together. Well, at least it did for you. It brought you closer to Chris.

Chris wasn’t always the drinking type. He was overtly responsible for the wellbeing of Stray Kids after all. But that night was a night to cut loose and get to know new people. You and Chris bonded almost instantly. First, you found out that he had a dog, Berry, who happened to be the same breed as your own. You cut up all night about how the 2 dogs sounded like something out of a children’s book- “The Adventures of Berry and Bella”- Bella, your baby Cavalier of course. He showed you Berry’s pictures, and you showed him Bella’s. They looked almost identical. When Chan made a remark about them being long-lost sisters, you felt your breath get taken away for a split second. You being Bella’s mom and Chris being Berry’s dad… it sounded like some “The Parent Trap” shit. You were feeding into it though. You jokingly asked if he called her “Barold like Harold” and Berry was just a nickname. You later found out that he grew up loving classic rock, just like you. Apparently he got it from his parents, just like you. Minute after minute, you kept finding more similarities and never-ending things to talk about. By around 2-3 AM, everyone else was ready to head out and go to bed. But for you, it felt like time had flown by. You silently hoped that Chris had felt the same way- that he had felt the same spark in the conversations. That he had held onto every word you said, just like you did to him. That he was desparately hoping that the night could last for just 5 more minutes. That he wished you would invite him over just to chat some more.

But these were things you could only hope for. You knew your place and you knew that it had to be called a night. You said your goodbyes and gave Chris a hug. You’re not sure if you imagined it, but the hug seemed extra long and extra warm. You tried not to read too far into it... That was hardly the end though. You two became friends, joking with each other whenever you ran into the other, like at his apartment that day with Jungkook, and always mentioning to the other that a group of you were going to dinner if the other wanted to join. All casually though. It didn’t matter that you found him extremely handsome. You never went out of your way to seek out Chris again, nor did he you. That is, until you found yourself as the last of the new Everyday Idols cast to remain in the JYPE building. Anna had gone home early, having a migraine but already having finished up what she needed for the day. You finished the day out until the others left, staying back to talk on the phone with a friend. It was Sammie, one of the girls in the close-knit friend group with you and Anna. There were 6 of you who had become the best of friends during medical school. And although you had the closest reliance on Anna, the other girls were about as close to you as any people could be. You had all consistently cried together, stayed up all night together, and hyped each other up, not letting anyone quit for the past 2 years. The kind of mental toll that medical school puts on people is pure psychological torture, and you felt sure that none of you could have withstood it without having each other.

“Hi Sammie!!! How are you?!” You were so happy to see her name pop up…. No response. You heard a lot of background noise and looked down to see that instead, it had been a group call. You were on the line with Sammie and Anna, as well as your other 3 best friends. Sniffles was all you could distinctly hear. The light lit up around her name, showing that the noise was coming from her line.

“Sammie, are you okay?” You heard Anna ask reassuringly. There was worry in her voice. You could tell that Sammie was trying to muster up her voice, but nothing was coming out.

“Sammie, please tell us what’s going on. Is everything alright?” You questioned her. There was definitely worry now in your voice too, but how could there not be?

“Guys, I just got my score back. I didn’t pass,” Sammie cried into the phone. You felt your heart break. You had all just taken the first level of the USMLE, the first exam in the series for your medical degree. You all knew Sammie had been struggling. She had to move her test date back by a month. But when everyone else had gotten their passing results, you knew Sammie’s passing score would could back the following month. I guess it turns out that it didn’t. And you all knew what that meant. Your throat got caught. Dead silence…

“Oh Sammie, no. I’m so so sorry,” you whispered in a hushed voice, straining to get the words out. You felt water welling up in your eyes. You sat down on the floor, criss-crossed, ready to settle on the phone for a while and braced yourself for the rest of the conversation. Your back was propped up against the wall-length mirror, but your entire upper body slouched over so as to shield your face from the world. All you heard on the other line was sniffles… still.

Finally, your friend Nia broke the silence. “It’s okay buddy, we are still so proud of you. We all tried so hard. It will be okay. Things just have to get shifted back a bit is all. It will be okay, I promise.” You made a mental note of how Nia said ‘things just have to get shifted back a bit.’ We all knew what that meant. Sammie was automatically going to be put on probation now. She would also automatically not be allowed to continue on with the other third years… She would not be allowed to continue on with us. If she failed again, she would be kicked out of medical school entirely, any hope of becoming a doctor shot out the window.

You could hear a rustling noise coming through on Sammie’s line, and you knew it was the sound of her using the sleeves of her sweater to wipe away her tears. “No, I know. It will be okay. I’m just- I just-“ you could hear the stuffiness in her voice and how close she was to breaking. “I can’t lose you guys,” she choked out, letting out a low, slow cry once it had been said. That one got you. ‘I can’t lose you guys’ rang in your head. You lifted your head up and all the way back, taking in a deep breath and blinking slowly to try and halt any tears that were trying to escape. You needed to be strong. For Sammie. Let her know that it was okay- that we would be okay. Things would be different, but we would always be friends. Hushed cries and sniffles could be heard from the other lines, with your other friends intermittently offering up their words of comfort. Once the line had gone silent for a moment, everyone sat in solitude. Not a word uttered, not a falling tear heard. Even though you wanted to believe that nothing would change, that you could all continue on the same as you had been for the past 2 years, you knew the reality of it. You knew how brutal medical school was, and how wrapped up everyone HAS to be in their own life and at their own level if they have any chance of making it. You know this because your friend group of 6 started out as 9. People just simply did not make it. People failed out, got so far behind that they couldn’t catch up, struggled so badly with their mental health that they couldn’t continue foreward, you name it. With Sammie risking that, and definitely falling behind to the class behind you, there was no denying that things would not be the same. It’s an unspoken rule that you cannot say that though. It’s an unspoken rule that you have to be cheerful at a time like this. Tears were streaming down each of your cheeks thinking about having to move on without her and how her heart must be breaking to see all of her friends continuing, leaving her by herself..

“We’re never gonna leave you behind, okay?” you cried out, wiping your nose with the sleeve of your jacket. You would try your very best. She cannot be one more who doesn’t make it. Your heart wouldn’t be able to handle that. You felt so guilty. Tears of sorrow were now replaced with tears of guilt as you covered your mouth to try to muffle any noise coming out. This continued until you felt numb. Until everyone on the line felt numb.

After another minute, everyone had soothed themselves and were starting to offer more encouragement. A weight of emotional exhaustion could be felt over the phone. You each ended the call with how much you love each other, miss each other, and promised each other that nothing would change. Even though you knew it would. With one final sniff and wipe to your cheeks, you ended the call. It took just about everything in you to stand up from the floor and stabilize yourself. You stood there for a minute, just trying to look straight ahead and get your footing. You gathered your things and exited the practice room into a long hallway. You headed first to get a cup of water, all too aware of how dehydrated the crying had made you. Once you reached the machine in the break room, you swiftly but shakily grabbed a cup and pressed the button to let the water down. With your other hand, you cupped your forehead and leaned over onto the same side’s elbow, hoping to get some pressure on your head and to get some congestion out. You felt pitiful- looked pitiful too.

Inhale, hold… Exhale, hold… Inhale, hold… Exhale, hold…

“Long day?” You heard a familiar Aussie voice chuckle from behind you. You leaned up now that your cup was done filling and turned around to face Chris. He had been stood there, just gazing towards you with his hands tucked into the pockets of his black sweatpants. You figured that must have been his signature look- a black hoodie and black pants. Come to think of it, you didn’t recall ever seeing him in something else. The moment he saw your face, how puffy and red you looked, his expression completely changed. Did he look worried?

“Yeah a little bit,” you tried to say with a sheepish smile, but a small crack came out. It was okay enough. Holding firmly on your cup, you looked down, took a long drink of the water, then lowered your hand again to start your trek out of the building. As you stepped past Chris, your arm brushed the fabric of his hoodie.

“Y/n?” He questioned abruptly, making you turn halfway around at a slow speed. You popped your head to the side a bit and looked him in the eyes but couldn’t muster up the energy to verbalize a response. You stood there waiting for him to continue, still with a worried expression evident on his face. “Are you okay?” He stared a hole right through your eyes.

You weren’t. Not really. But you didn’t know Chris enough to dump any of that on him. He’s here late too; you were sure he was busy and had plenty of work to do. Even though you did like to vent and talk things out to relieve the stress of it, that wasn’t something to do with someone who doesn’t deeply know you. That will be an activity for you and Anna once you get to the hotel. With all the strength you had, you lifted your head up high to meet his gaze. You lightly bit your cheek and feverishly nodded your head up and down. “Yeah, I’m fine.” Shallow breath in and out. “Thanks though.” You offered another low smile and turned on your heels to leave.

“I’m serious, you know. If you need someone to talk to, I’ll be in my studio. I’ve been through this before too, yeah?” You heard him call out behind you as you walked. It made you hault and think on what he said. ‘I’ve been through this before too.’ … Oh, he thinks you’re upset over the training process- over the show and the practices you’re having to do and classes you’re having to take. You wanted to do well, yes, but you couldn’t care less about the outcome of the show. You didn’t want to be an idol- you probably wouldn’t even take the offer if it was given to you. ‘Not that it would be.’ But you had another calling, one that you loved and that you deeply cared about. One that made you feel like you made a difference in the world and could actually help people. Sammie had that calling too, or that same feeling at least. You weren’t sure if her chance was gone now.

“It’s not about the show or the training. I just- I’m sorry, I don’t think you’d understand,” you quietly muttered, only half turning back. The exhaustion and lack of emotion in your response was evident. You started making your way again toward the company building’s exit door.

“Try me,” you heard Chris call, sounding half stern but half playful.

You paused for a long moment, contemplating. You had to admit, it was a bit tempting. “Fine,” you gave in. You crossed your arms on your chest after you had turned your body around. You let out a breath that you didn’t even know you’d been holding in and walked forward towards Chris. “Can we go to your studio?”

———————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————

“It just feels like I keep losing the people that I care about. I feel so hopeless, like there’s nothing I can do to help them,” you were lightly crying, holding onto a pillow and looking down so as to shield your face. “And I know it’s ridiculous. And I know it’s not my responsibility to make sure that everyone makes it through. But that’s my friend, you know? And I know that she can do it, she just needed more time. When she pushed back her testing date I told her to call me if she needed any help… God, why didn’t she just call me? Why didn’t I call her? I knew she was struggling, but I didn’t bother to do anything… Didn’t do anything to help… I mean I know it’s not totally on me, but GOD I feel like I’m responsible. We always worked through everything together for studying. She was the reason I even made it through the first two years. And now it feels like I’m abandoning her and there’s nothing I can even do about it. Fuck, I just feel… I feel so guilty. So so guilty. And it’s like, if this happened to her, then when is it my time? Ya know? Like she is so smart. Smarter than me. I just, I don’t see how I can do this,” you kept rambling and rambling. Chris had led you a few doors down to his studio, where you both had plopped onto his grey leather couch. Each of your bodies were turned toward the other, one leg up on the couch, so close to touching one another’s knees. You didn’t mean to ramble on like this. Honestly, you knew you were emotional, but not to this point. Feelings and emotions came out that you didn’t even register you had yet. Guilt being a big one. Chris didn’t say anything while you were talking. He just sat patiently, nodding along to what you had to say. He looked into your eyes with such conviction as you confided in him, looking like he was trying to search for something there that he hadn’t yet found. Once he realized you were done with what you had to say, he took a breath in and began with his words.

“You know, I felt like that too before,” he said, scooting in slightly to bring his face closer to yours and lowering his voice. “It’s not so different, being a trainee and being in medical school. You kill yourself trying so hard each day, only to see the people you love not make it. It hurts. It hurts a lot.” He tried to ignore the fact that his voice was going in and out, plagued by a crack that he couldn’t stifle. His brow began to furrow as asense of seriousness came over him. “And it makes you turn cold, to want to hide away and recluse those emotions. Trust me, I get it. And I’m sorry you’re having to go through that. I’m sorry to your friend as well.” His eyes were big, something was in there- it looked like genuine hurt.

Tears were welling in your eyes. You broke eye contact with Chris to look up and over to the corner of the room. To look at anything else so you didn’t start letting tears stream again. You clicked your toungue, then ran it across your teeth before taking a gulp. Once you had calmed yourself to the point you didn’t think you would cry anymore, you looked back down to a sweetly, patiently waiting Chris, who still had just as much concern on his face. “What do I do? What did you do when you felt like this?”

You could see him almost smile in a way. Or blush maybe. His eyes lit up the teeniest bit. You could see it. There had been new look on his face. Was it endearment? Whatever it was, he must have liked when people asked him for his advice or trusted his judgement. The expression was fleeting, and he went back to his prior worried face. “There’s nothing you can do besides try to learn to be okay with it. I know that’s probably not an answer that helps very much, but there really isn’t much you can do to fix it, yeah? It will be okay.” You had looked down by this point, so Chris leaned down to meet your eye level, locking you in. He extended his right index and middle fingers to hold the bottom of your chin, slowly but delicately bringing your face back up to normal with his head following right along. He never broke eye contact. He started to whisper. “Hey, you’ve done nothing wrong. Sometimes things happen, things that we can’t change. And if we spend our whole lives worrying about those things, then we will never move on to what we are meant to do. I know it must be hard seeing your friend not move on with you. And I know how discouraging it feels to think that it’s just a matter of time before you’re next. But you have to keep your head up and keep going. You can still be a good friend. You can still be a supporter and a helper. You can still be a confidant. But you can’t forget that this is your dream too. And as harsh as it sounds, sometimes you’ve just got to do what you’ve got to do to stay alive… Whether that means push your feelings aside or not. You still have your other friends to go through this with, yeah? Let them be your rock, and you be theirs. I can’t promise you that you’ll all make it through together. But I can promise you that if everyone works hard enough, they will make it through… You will make it through.” You had a few stray tears rolling down your face with Chris’ words. Somewhat because of the situation, yes, but the words did help. They made you feel reassured. More than anything, they made you feel seen. Made you feel like someone understands the pain you felt, even if it was a bit ridiculous to be so worked up. A small smile crept up. You looked down, then back up at Chris with an approving nod.

“You’re right,” you took a deep breath out. Your hands reached for your eyes to wipe at them and then went right back down to your lap. The mood had quickly shifted in the room from something serious and uptight to calm and relaxed. “Thank you Chris, really. Even just letting me get everything out made me feel better, but I do really appreciate your advice. I really value the way that you think. Really. Thank you.”

Chris blushed. He reached for the back of his neck to hold it, feeling obviously shy. “Don’t say that,” he looked down, smiling. “It’s no problem.” He put his arm down and looked up. “You feeling better?”

“Yes, thank you,” you chuckled. You instinctively went in for a hug, which Chris reciprocated. The moment he locked his arms around your back, he felt so warm… so comforting. It was like his warm words had been personafied into an action, the everyday expression of a hug. Something about this moment just felt right. You leaned in even closer, deepening the hug. Chris picked up on your cues and gently reciprocated, pushing you closer into his chest as well. He started to rub your back, making contact with your hair and neck, ever so slightly. You let out a small sigh and melted in. You felt his breath hitch, his heart stopping for just one second while he seemed to tense up. Just for a split second though. He soothed down into your grasp as well and started to rock into the hug, rubbing larger circles onto your back. You stayed like that for a few more moments, just enjoying each other’s body heat and the calm silence that remained in the building since you were the only two left. You wished you could stay like that for the next hour, but then again, you knew if you didn’t pull away soon, things would start to feel awkward. You slowly started to pull your arms back and away from his back and waist, dragging your hands lightly along the black hoodie as you went. Chris matched your actions and untangled his limbs from around your body, pulling away from your side and upper back. It was slow. It was meaningful. You weren’t sure if it was intentional, but he continued to slowly drag his hands away until one was resting on your waist and the other on the opposing side of your neck between your ear and jaw. For just a split second, he held his position, then slowly pulled his hands completely off of you. He smiled but looked down while pulling his body back, from only inches away to now a couple of feet.

You returned the smile and looked down to your hands folded in your lap. “I appreciate you Chris. I really really do. I know you’re super busy, so it means a lot to me that you’d take the time to listen to me. Hopefully one day, I can return the favor.”

“I’ll never be too busy,” he said under his breath while still looking down, almost like he didn’t want you to hear it. “People like us, we’ve gotta stick together, yeah? The world is hard sometimes, but we can lean on each other to make it a bit easier… Plus, we’ve gotta stick it out so Berry and Bella can have some play dates the next time you come back,” he giggled and looked at you endearingly. Something about that comment made your heart swell. “You will come back, won’t you?” He raised his eyebrow and gave you and over-dramatic expression, like he was wanting to get a laugh out of you. This man lol.

“Of course I’ll come back. Our long-lost daughters will be dying to meet each other, I’m sure.” You cracked a smile. A genuine smile. “Plus, people like us have to stick together, remember?” You lightheartedly asked, mirroring what he had just told you.

“Yeah, yeah we do.” He smiled and looked straight into your eyes. You could have sworn he was closer now than he had been a few seconds ago. Or maybe you wanted him to be. You could have reached out, pulled him into another hug. It would have felt natural. Well, to you at least. You didn’t want to out-hug Chris for the night. Plus, I’m sure you were somewhat swayed by how handsome he is, which factored into it. You shifted your position back slightly.

“I better get out of here and get back to the hotel. Anna thought I was headed back like 30 minutes ago. I know she’s probably as stressed as me about everything going on,” you stood up off of the couch. Chris followed suit as you shuffled past him toward the door.

“Tell her what we talked about and hopefully it can calm her down some too.” Chris caught your waist with his hand as you went to open the door. “Do you want me to walk with you back to your hotel? It’s late, and I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable or anything.” You turned to face him. What a cutie. He was probably just saying it to be nice. Also probably because you were still a distraught foreign woman about to wonder the streets alone after midnight. Still cute though.

“That’s okay. It’s the opposite direction from your apartment anyways, so I wouldn’t want to put you out that much.” You knew from meeting up with Changbin at their apartment that it would probably take around 30 minutes for him to get back to his place if he accompanied you to yours. Just seemed like a bit much at this time of night.

“I know, but I promise I don’t mind.” … Wait hold up. ‘I know?’ How did he know where your hotel was? You didn’t think you’d mentioned it. Old conversations started to scan through your mind, trying to think of any time you may have mentioned it to him. Nothing you could think of. Maybe you had drank too much the night everyone was together. Maybe a bunch of other Everyday Idol contestants were staying at the same place. Whatever, not a big deal.

“It’s okay Chris, really. But thank you. That’s very kind,” you smiled warmly at him. He took it openly. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Yeah, of course!” He exclaimed, sounding a bit off. Almost… nervous? One more quick exchange of smiles and you were off. Once you had reached the cold air that hit you outside of the confines of the JYPE building, you silently thanked yourself for telling Chris you’d be alright on your own. You didn’t want him to see you with your teeth chattering, lips getting chapped, and nose about to run from the cold. The only thing that kept you thawed while on the trek back was thinking about Chris’ kindness. The fact that he even offered to walk you to your hotel made your cheeks heat up. Did he mean anything else by that? You were sure not. He’s just a good guy. But you couldn’t help but let your mind wander just a little bit. I wish he was my good guy. Maybe he could think that too?

————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————

And that is why, here you were, arguing with your best friend over whether or not you should respond to a message from Jeon Jungkook, of all people, wanting to see you. I mean, you weren’t blind. Jungkook was cute, yes. But having his first words to you be: “Heyyy there,” while smirking and definitely looking at your tits instead of your face, didn’t exactly make you want to see him again. How could that even be an option when you could only think about Chris? Sweet, sweet Chris.

“Okay, so he was a little bit of an asshole,” Anna started. “But you literally only talked to him for like 2 minutes. How do you know he’s really like that? What if he was just putting up a front trying to seem cool? Obviously he’s interested in you, I mean he Instagram messaged you for God’s sake. I’d bet he was just nervous and didn’t know how to act around you. I think you should give him another chance.” You pondered this for a second. Jungkook was weird around you for sure. But knowing what you now knew, you guessed it could be from putting up a front with you. You guessed that could be a possibility. The more you thought about it, the more you thought Anna’s points were valid. What about Chris though?

“I guess you have a point,” you gave in. Anna looked at you with a smirk and an “I-told-you-so” expression. “But even if that was the case, I don’t… I’m stuck.” You leaned down closer to the table and lowered your voice even more, as if it were possible. “I think I have a little crush on Chris.”

“It’s about fucking time you said it!” Anna laughed, her voice growing louder. “I just knew you and Chris had something there since the night we all met for drinks. Ahhhh my bestie has a little crush!!!” She reached out to grab your cheeks. You turned red and swatted her hands away, pulling them down onto the table, bringing the rest of your body with her.

“Keep it down,” you scolded her. “It’s a one-sided thing. I don’t want anyone to know please, it’s low-key mortifying,” you scoffed while saying it, looking around the room to see if Anna’s wonderfully “robust” voice had grabbed the attention of some wondering ears. You didn’t see anything. “But even if it is one sided, I don’t want to ruin my chance before I even get one. Jungkook and Chris are friends. Surely, he’d find out.”

“Okay… So let him.”

“Huh?” You questioned, not sure what she was getting at.

“Let Chris get jealous.” She was being so serious. “It’s not like Chris has tried to make any kind of move on you since you’ve seen him. And neither have you. I mean you literally saw him the other day when you met JK and he said absolutely nothing out of the ordinary. In my book, JK is at least trying. Just go for it. See what happens.” You contemplated her words. “Maybe Chris will get jealous and confess his love to you,” she said taunting, opening her eyes really big to tease you. “Or maybe… maybe you’ll find out Jungkook is actually a pretty cool guy… And a guy who’s really into you and willing to make a move at that.” Damn, she is really coming through with some good points today.

“I’ll think about it,” you smiled back. You looked down to check the message again, only to realize what time it was. You both needed to get going to a meeting. You motioned down for Anna to look at the time.

“Come on, we better go.” You both stood up and turned to walk toward the exit. You passed by Felix’s table on the way through and looked over to give him a smile and wave, so as to say goodbye. Instead of the usual wave back, he just looked at you and smiled, brows raised high on his face, almost teasingly. He gave you the expression of knowing something that he shouldn’t. Or maybe HEARING something that he shouldn’t. OH SHIT. Your eyes shifted to Anna, wide as they’d ever been; however, she didn’t seem to notice and walked along without a care in the world. Your eyes darted back to Felix for a split second, hoping he’d looked away and you were misreading things. Surely you were just paranoid. His eyes met yours, still with the same gleefull smile. He let out a small chuckle, held the eye contact for one more second, and looked down at his phone, suddenly typing away. FUCK.

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✨Continue to ➡️ Chapter 2

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promise-you-doie · 7 months

Text

Like a Butterfly | P. Wonbin

Summary: Love is like a butterfly, a rare and gentle thing, how lucky of you to have found it twice. Pairings: Shotaro x Reader Wonbin x Reader words: 15k Genre: kind of a love triangle, fluff, angst. Warnings: mild cursing, suggestive. that's all. :)

Poetry has been around since the beginning of time. It knew many forms and emotions. You loved it because it had no rules, no restrictions. anything could be poetry. That was the beauty of art.

If you had a Time Machine you would teleport back to the time when life was simpler. You didn’t have the stress of school, the weight of peoples opinions or the inconvenience of being somewhat an adult.

Luckily you didn’t need a Time Machine, you had Wonbin. Having his arms wrapped around you was your form of escapism.

His fingers intertwined in yours and you feel yourself chasing all the heat his body has to offer as you push yourself as close as physics would allow you to. You love him, you’re sure of it.

You love the beautiful melody of his voice, the lovely shapes in his face. The brightness of his smile, the softness of his hands. and sometimes you think you love the way he loves you, but he doesn’t. That’s the issue.

You often find yourself daydreaming of an alternate universe in which he cared for you the way you care for him. It wouldn’t be too different from the one you’re in now. Only difference is you wouldn’t have to hide with him.

The two of you could love each other aloud, you could kiss him in front of your friends. Hold hands during the day.

But those were just daydreams. This is reality, and In your reality you were sitting on the opposite side of the food court watching Wonbin smile and giggle with a girl who wasn’t you.

Over time you’d gotten better at keeping your emotions tamed.

“Girl? You got beef with the broccoli?”

Well… you were still working on it.

“It's just not-“ you stab the broccoli a few more times before you give up and just throw the fork down.

“Is something bothering you?” Shotaro asks softly. Hearing his voice only eases you down. You could never be upset around him, not when he’s giving you a look like he’ll do anything on the planet to make sure your smile never fades.

It wasn’t just his eyes that were telling you that, it was everything about him. It’s just how he was.

“I’m just so stressed with midterms coming up. I can’t fail, my parents will kill me.” You partly lie.

“Want me to come over later, we can study together. I’ll make sure to get the cherry ice cream that you really like.”

His suggestion is enough to erase whatever distress you were feeling.

“Thank you taro.” You smile at him

“Oh you two are so cute. Just date already.” Giselle laughs watching the two of you interact with each other.

You wished it were that simple, you would just be happy with Shotaro like everyone expected you to. But the only dilemma to this obvious solution, was that you only kinda liked shotaro. But you really like Wonbin.

As if he could hear your thoughts, the devil with a sly smile walks over to your table stirring up your emotions once again. Smirking as if he knows how upset he’s made you talking to that girl.

“What’s going on over here?”

“Nothing that concerns you?” Winter dismisses him.

You try to ignore him but you can’t help but feel his gaze burning into you like the rays of the sun. Usually you loved it, but right now his intense contact made you wanna crawl up into a ball and vanish.

“Who’s the girl you were flirting with?” Ningning asks

“He probably doesn’t even know her name? It’s a new girl everyday with him.” Karina adds

Hearing it all made you want to throw up, but you keep your calm. Simply picking at the food on your plate trying to tune out the conversation that's happening right before you.

You’re so immersed in your food that you don’t even notice that everyone’s stopped talking and is watching you brutally stab at the chicken.

“Oh that poor chicken.” Ningning whispers.

After a few short seconds you break out of your own bubble and look up at your group of friends, quickly taking notice of horror on each of their faces.

“Sorry, I gotta use the bathroom.” You say dismissing yourself from the table.

“Damn, if she’s this scared for midterms. There’s no hope for the rest of us.” Sohee deadpans

“To be fair, there was never any hope for you.” Winter snickers.

The table breaks off into a new conversation, completely missing when Wonbin sneaks off after you.

“Where are you heading off to?” You hear Wonbin in some distance behind you.

“Class.”

Within a split second his hand is on your wrist pulling you back towards him until you’re face to chest.

“We have some time.”

“I’ve gotta get to class, Wonbin.”

“What’s up?”

“Nothing, I’m just-“

“You know i know better”

You couldn’t tell him the real truth. That it bothered you seeing him with someone else. That you were jealous but you had no right to be because the two of you weren’t even dating.

“It’s just a lot right now.”

“You usually come to me about these kinds of things.” He says softly and it makes you melt, almost as much as his subtle touch to your cheek.

“I've just been a little too busy lately.”

“Then I’ll just come over tonight, we can talk all you want.”

The offer was tempting. The only thing that could fix you was laying for hours in his arms and talking until you mumbled yourself to sleep just as you always do.

“Can’t. I’m studying with shotaro tonight.”

“Then I’ll just stop by afterwards.”

“I’m gonna be late for class.”

“I’ll see you later?”

“Goodbye, Wonbin.”

Laughter echoed throughout the living room where you and shotaro remained. Textbooks, notebooks, pens and snacks took up the space between the both of you. Keeping the mood light and easy.

“Okay let’s see…” you pause for a moment to search for a question you were sure he wasn’t gonna get.

“What is the term used to describe a process that is both catabolic and anabolic?”

“Amphibolic.”

“No fair, you cheated.”

“No i didn’t.”

“Did too!”

“Did not.”

In the middle of your childish bickering you hear your phone ding. Your first instinct was only to ignore it, and switch your phone off. But you quickly get a change of heart when you see that Wonbin is the reason for the notification.

Wonbin <3: still studying?

Wonbin <3: I miss you

Wonbin <3: Can’t stop thinking about you

Each message sends a new wave of butterflies, it’s almost sickening how you allowed him to have this effect on you.

You: I’m trying to focus

Wonbin <3: I’m sorry baby, continue studying.

“Sorry, Karina’s nagging me about her new shoes.” You made up.

“Actually it’s getting pretty late, do you wanna call it a night?” He asks as he’s already closing the books, knowing what your answer is gonna be before you get a chance to say anything.

“Um. Yeah, we can continue another time. I’m getting pretty tired.”

“So I’ll see you in class.”

“Of course. Drive safely. Text me when you get home.”

“Goodnight.”

“Goodnight, shotaro.” You smile warmly at him and it lingers for a few seconds before he finally leaves. You can’t help but hold your smile even after you close the door to your apartment and reach to clean up the small mess on your floor. It’s only a few books, highlighters and a set of keys that you assumed were yours at first but after picking them up you quickly noticed they weren’t.

Just as soon as you come to the conclusion of who the keys could belong to you hear a knock at the door.

“I picked them up as so-“ your eyes widen the moment you notice that it’s not shotaro but Wonbin standing on the other side of your doorway. Within two seconds you pull him in and check the hallway to make sure that no one saw him coming to your apartment at 11 pm at night.

“What are you doing here?” You whisper, shout, as if people can hear you through the walls.

“I wanted to see you.”

“What if he saw you?” And the moment the words leave your mouth there’s another knock at the door. You only have five seconds to think and in those five seconds you push Wonbin out of view and breathe before you open the door.

“I left my keys.”

“Yeah, I picked them up just a few seconds ago.”

“I also wanted to ask if maybe you’d want to come with me to the fall festival tomorrow.”

You fix your lips and you’re about to accept his invitation when you hear a loud noise coming from Wonbins direction.

“Did something fall?”

“No yeah it’s just a painting I’ve been trying to keep up. But it keeps falling.”

“Do you need help with it?”

“Uh no i think i might just return it, but yes i definitely want to join you tomorrow.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. I think it’ll be fun.”

“Good, so uh I’ll just text you when I get home.”

“Drive safe, good night.”

“Goodnight.”

The second you close and lock the door you’re scolding Wonbin yet again.

“Are you trying to get us caught?”

“It just fell.”

“Oh just fell my ass.” You yell at him but you can’t remain serious when he’s looking down at you with his dark Diamond eyes. Or when he gives you that smile that you absolutely hate (love).

“I’ll be more careful next time.” he smirks.

You wanna scold him about there not being a “next time” but there’s only so much you can say when your lips are occupied with his own.

His hands are tugging and your waist to pull you closer to him and naturally your hands wrap around his forearms. Your conscience is telling you this is wrong and you need to end whatever it is that the two of you have going on. But your heart completely disagrees as you’re pulling him even closer to you like he’s gonna disappear under your grasp.

You find yourself in this position too often. You wished you could say you hated it, but that’s just not the case. It’s almost sickening how weak you are for him. All he had to do was say your name and you’d fold for him time and time again.

His fingers are twirling around in your hair, your legs are horizontally crossing his and cheeks are pressed against his chest. By now your eyes are getting heavier and heavier, and the warmth of his body doesn’t aid in your sleepiness. Nor does the way his chest vibrates every time he speaks, and especially not when his voice is soft and soothing.

“What got you upset this morning?” He circles the question back around after hours. You don’t wanna remember the way she smiled at him or the way she brushed her hand against his arm. And you especially don’t wanna have to tell him about your frustrations so you sum it up to. “Just something the girls and I were talking about.” Hoping he wouldn’t ask any more questions about the matter.

Eventually you shift your body so you can just lay over top of him, and comfortably fall asleep on his chest. The rhythm of his beating heart and the way his body rises with each breath he takes is more than enough to have you drifting to sleep once again and when you’re hanging on to a single thread of energy he kisses atop your head and whispers for you to sleep well.

“Are you here by yourself?” That’s the single question that landed you here in the first place.

You’re sitting alone in an almost empty library. There’s just you, a few other students and the librarian. It’s quiet, that’s why you loved it. perfect place to go and get set on all of your academics or just escape from the noises of everyday life.

You’re so interested in your book that you fail to notice Wonbin walk in, and immediately gravitate over to you.

It’s not until he speaks that you lift your head from the contents of your novel to meet his eyes, and a pretty smile to match.

“Are you here by yourself?” He asks

“Yeah, I just needed to clear my head.”

From there is when you both begin a conversation, you realize that he’s easy to talk to. The conversation just flows like the crystal clear water of a river. You talk enough to have just wasted 3 hours of what was supposed to be alone time. But you feel as if you’d rather have spent time talking to him than doing anything else.

Overtime he becomes the person you can go to just to talk. Talk about any and everything, but somehow conversations led to prolonged kisses and touching each other in ways you wouldn’t want from anyone else.

“I’ve never kissed anyone.”

“Really, never?”

“I mean well, I kissed this guy in freshman year of highschool. but it was so weird I don't even wanna think about it.”

you stopped talking when you noticed him watching your lips. For a good few seconds neither of you said anything. The only noise to fill the air was the background noise of the T.V.

“First kisses are usually always awkward, mine was.”

you gasp a little when his focus shifts from your lips back to your eyes.

“yeah, I guess so.”

“So I'm guessing you haven’t dated anyone?”

“no, not yet.”

“How come?”

“I just don’t have the time, not with school and stuff.”

“but you have time to talk to me.”

“That's because I like talking to you.”

“you do?”

with each sentence that leaves his mouth you hear the tone of his voice get softer and softer. you couldn’t remember when it started, when you started liking him. or when just the sound of his voice became so intoxicating to you, but what you did know was that there wasn’t anything you could do about it.

so when he gently slipped his hand under your jaw and hooked around the side of your face, and kept eye contact with you as he got closer and closer until you felt his breath brush upon your lips. you only closed your eyes, you didn’t have the willpower to fight him off and even if you did. you wouldn’t want to.

because your second kiss was way better than your first, it was unclear why though. was it the quality of the kiss, or was it the person you shared the kiss with? you were unsure, and as much as you wanted to find out. you couldn’t, it couldn’t happen. not again.

being with wonbin broke so many of the friendship rules and you knew that. which is why you never told your friends and you never kissed him again.

however the conversations never stopped, talking to him was how you managed through busy weeks and frustrating assignments. you were too busy for leisure time, let alone relationships. so how did you make time for him? how did you manage time to sneak around with him?

“you just take this 4 and multiply it by the 7 down here.” you ask

when you look up is when you finally notice how close he was. you stop breathing for a few seconds looking down to see that if you moved just a few inches you’d be touching his fluffy pretty lips.

but you blink out of your fantasy, you’d already made it clear that what happened before, can’t happen again.

“are you keeping up?”

“no i think i got lost, could you run it over one more time.” he’s just barely whispering now, and staring at your lips.

“yeah, umm you just…”

before you could explain anything he moves the hair from covering your face, using only his index finger to push it over your shoulder so he could see you a little more clearly.

“wonbin…” you whine lowly and it causes him to laugh in a way that gives you butterflies.

“yeah?” he asks innocently.

it’s his smile, it’s his smile that makes your heart beat outside of your chest. it’s his smile that makes you act the way you do. it’s his smile that posses you to kiss him back when he lays his lips on yours.

“We can't take this any further.” you say once you push him off of you

“okay.” his lips are agreeing but his hands aren’t obeying. sliding past the skin of your thigh in a way that makes you dizzy.

“I won't do anything you don’t want me to.”

“it’s not that i don’t want to…”

“then tell me what it is?”

“you can’t flirt your way out of this assignment.” the words come out in a whisper as you take his larger hands into your own, to stop him from sliding up and down your leg.

the rest of the evening went smoothly. only small touches here and there. but nothing that you felt like would jeopardize the friendship. but when he leaves and you fall back on your bed all you think about is how perfect his lips felt on yours or how electrifying his hands felt on your skin.

you know that the friendship is beyond jeopardized by now. you don't know when the damage began, if it was when you shared the first kiss? or if it was when you rolled off your bed to answer the door after wonbin had left, only to find that he was back. and he was thinking about you just how you were thinking about him.

“Why are you still here?” you question but he doesn’t answer. He walks in the more you back up until he’s far enough to close the door behind him.

“Can I kiss you?”

“no.” you wish you had the strength to say that. no, more like you wished you could say that and actually mean it. but he stands over you looking down at you in a way that makes you forget everything else.

“please.”

What started as a kiss ended as the two of you wrapped in your sheets.

you shielded your face in his neck from all of the embarrassment you felt, knowing that it was far too late to just stay “friends”.

“We can't tell anyone about this.”

“I won’t say a thing.”

he agrees as he lays a sweet kiss on the side of your head.

you thought that this was the lowest you could go. having sex with him and lying to your friends. but you found a way to go lower, you fell in love.

you fell in love with him, and you fell in love with sneaking around with him. kissing in hidden hallways, lingering gazes in front of your friends and cryptic conversations.

that’s why everytime he comes over you can’t help but give in to him. anger doesn’t exist when you’re around him and you wanted so deeply to hate him. but you just can’t

Within 30 minutes of Wonbin waking you to tell you he was leaving to get ready for school, your alarm went off, telling you that it was now your turn. Not ready to get up yet you snooze your alarm for 20 more minutes.

After twenty minutes pass and your alarm goes off again you roll out of bed and throw on the first thing you see. Which happens to be an oversized black zip up hoodie and a pair of jeans.

“Is that Wonbin’s hoodie?” Giselle asks the second she she’s you.

“Hmm?” You finally look down at the large garment you’re wearing. Nearly widening your eyes when you realize it is in fact his hoodie.

“No. Girl why would I be wearing Wonbin’s hoodie?” You laugh off and she follows after you

“I thought it was for a second.”

“Anyways I heard shotaro finally asked you out on a date.”

“It’s not really a date, we’re just hanging out.”

“Hanging out alone? It's definitely a date.” She re-adresses and continues

“It’s about time, you guys move like turtles.”

By the time she finishes her sentence you’re standing right out front of the door to the class.

“It’s just a little hang out.”

“Talk to someone who doesn’t know any better.”

“Goodbye Gigi.”

“Bye girl.”

The second you walk into class you catch a glimpse of the very girl that had her paws over (not) your man yesterday morning. But you don’t get much time to think because shotaro calls your name and signals you over to take a seat next to him.

“Hey.” You smile before you take a seat.

“How’d you sleep?”

“I slept pretty well.”

“So we’re still on for tonight.”

“Yeah of course.”

He smiles and turns to the teacher when she begins to speak. You wanna pay attention to the class, but all your focus goes to the brunette beauty sitting far across the room.

She’s talking to her friend and she starts to smile, you see just how pretty her smile is. Which you hadn’t noticed yesterday. She’s gorgeous and you hate it. You hate how pretty she is, you hate that you’re now so fixed on her because of one minor interaction between her and someone that you weren’t even supposed to be with.

Each time you try to pretend she isn’t there, you find yourself taking more and more peaks of her. By the end of the class you’re now hating yourself and wanting again to just disappear into thin air.

You leave class immediately, wanting to head to the bathroom and take a small break but Wonbin has other plans as he stands outside of your class to pull you aside the second you walk out.

“Why haven’t you responded to my text?”

“Huh?” You question clearly confused about what it is he would even be messaging you about that was so serious it warranted him standing outside of your class like a fool.

“Didn’t you get my messages?”

“No, I haven't checked my phone.”

“Wow, nice to see that you guys are finally talking. Sometimes i forget that you two know each other.” Shotaro speaks from besides you.

“It’s just there's nothing for us to really talk about.”

“I think we’d have more conversations if you didn’t ignore me.”

To that you just laugh off, hoping that Shotaro didn’t catch the sarcasm in Wonbin’s statement.

“Well I’ll leave you guys to talk, I’ll be in the library.” Shotaro points as he walks off and you fix your legs to follow after him but Wonbin takes your wrist and pulls you back to him.

Only for you to quickly pull it away. “What are you trying to do?”

“Sorry, wouldn’t want your boyfriend to catch us.”

“He’s not my boyfriend.” You say first

“And secondly i didn’t say anything when you were fucking that girl with your eyes yesterday.”

You wanna die when he smiles down at you, finally pulling out the answer that you’d been trying to hide.

“Is that why you were so mad?” he mocks.

“No, I wasn’t mad. I don’t care. do what you want.”

“To be fair you’re not being so discreet, walking around campus with my hoodie on.”

“I didn’t realize it was yours until I got to school.”

“But you still have it on.”

“I don’t have a shirt on '' you whisper shyly enough for him to hear. The way he smiled at you makes you debate on whether you wanna kiss him in front of everyone or run and hide.

“Well you look good in it.” He says playing on the strings of the hoodie.

“Can I see you later?”

“You know you can’t.”

“Right, you have a date.”

“It’s not a date.”

“Then go tell him that.”

“No. Why would - I don't have time for this. I have to go study.”

“Study hard.” You don’t give a response, you just roll your eyes and walk away.

This is a date. There was no point of lying to yourself anymore when you knew the answer. Shotaro’s handsy, not in the way that makes you uncomfortable, but in the way that if a stranger were watching they’d think that you were a couple.

Of course you don’t mind it when he slides an arm around your waist and pulls you close to him whenever a stranger passes by you. Or when he slips his hand over yours to lead you through the different activities.

In fact you think you might actually like it. The mood with shotaro is so light you feel like you're just floating. You’re happy, and you know you can most definitely get used to this.

“Look.” He says to grab your attention. You turn around and see he’s holding his phone to take a selfie with you. So easily you hold up a pose to match his expression and watch as he takes a few flicks.

He swipes through the pictures in front of you so you can see the results. Leaned against him with your arm looped around his.

“These are so cute.”

“You like them?”

“Mhm, send them to me.”

“Okay what do you wanna do next?”

“Um~” you hymn while looking, scanning around the area to see what catches your eye. Each station looks fun and interactive but when you see a coffee stand that has hot chocolate, your mind is made up immediately.

“Let’s get hot chocolate.” You look up at him and he’s looking down at you with his dark orbs.

“Hot chocolate it is.”

He leads you to the hot chocolate station and stands with you in line.

“Which one do you want?”

“Pumpkin with whipped cream.”

You wait in line, your arms remained tightened around Shotaro while he placed the order. You only pull your arms off of him when the person working the stand passes you your cup of hot chocolate.

“Oh look, it's Wonbin.”

Hearing his name is enough to perk your ears up. You hadn’t thought about him the whole night, and you really don’t wanna start now.

You follow Shotaro's eyes to see Wonbin standing not far away from you. He doesn’t notice you standing there until Shotaro calls out his name and signals him over to you.

Wonbin sees Shotaro first and then he sees you, shaking your head back and forth with widened eyes hoping that he’d take the hint and stay where he is. But he doesn’t, of course he doesn’t.

“Hey I didn't know you guys would be here.” Wonbin lied straight through his pretty lips.

“We were just hanging out.” Shotaro responds on your behalf

“I’ve been looking for you. I got our hot chocolate.” The same girl from yesterday stood right in front of you again. Wearing the same smile she had prior and a look in her eyes that tells you that she really really liked Wonbin.

“Thanks.” He says retrieving a cup from one of her hands and using his other hand to hold the hand he just freed.

You feel sick again, just as you did yesterday morning. The worst part is that you know that he knows because of the way he smirks darkly at you.

“Oh these are my friends.”

“Oh I know you guys, we have biology together. I always thought that you made the cutest couple.”

You smile and look up at Shotaro who’s also smiling.

“They aren’t dating.” wonbin sternly corrects her before she gets a chance to finish her sentence

“Wait really, you should y’all are so cute together.” She compliments again. Completely oblivious to the way wonbin turns his head and rolls his eyes.

“Wouldn’t they be perfect together?” She looks up at Wonbin for an answer.

“Yeah, I couldn't imagine her with anyone else.”

“Thanks everyone tells us that we should get together.” You smile up at shotaro hoping to make Wonbin at least half as upset as he made you.

“We should leave you love birds to finish your night.”

“Actually I think it would be fun for us to go through the haunted maze together.” You loop your arm back around Shotaro and smile at Wonbin.

“Oh my god, yes.” Wonbin’s date jumps and sequels.

The night was fun before and you had expected it to get even better, clinging on Shotaro as you walked in front of Wonbin and his date through the maze. Tightening your hold onto his arm each time another actor popped out. Or giggling about how brave he was, knowing that wonbin got to see everything.

You just wished that you could keep up the act for the entire night. Or at least not visibly roll your eyes when you hear a small voice behind you go “this is so scary, can I hold your hand.” It took everything in you not to turn around to see what was going on behind you.

The more you hear the conversation going on behind you the more you cling to Shotaro. Half attempting to make him jealous and half hoping that if you spent more time worrying about Shotaro you’d spend less time thinking about wonbin and the girl behind you, and not what they were doing.

Not that there was actually anything happening, wonbin was too occupied with watching you laugh and smile with Shotaro to even care about the girl that he invited simply to see you get mad again. Her hands on him went completely unnoticed as he poked his tongue through his cheek to stop himself from making any comments aloud.

When all of you finished the maze you were annoyed and so was he, but both of you were stubborn. So he wore a pretty fake smile when he wrapped his arm around the girl beside him and you did the same, intertwining your fingers with Shotaro's and smiling up to him about how fun the maze was.

You weren’t even trying to piss Wonbin off anymore, you were just trying to keep up the act that you started. Unsure of who you were doing it for. Were you trying to convince Wonbin, Shotaro or yourself?

The night ends off with you in the passenger seat of his car, after he arrives at your apartment.

“I had so much fun, taro. Thanks for inviting me out.”

“I’m glad you enjoyed yourself, I actually wanted to talk to you a little bit.”

“Yeah? What's up?”

“Well actually I’ve been thinking about this for a while. I just didn’t wanna make a fool of myself, but I was talking to the guys about it, and they said I should just do it. I don’t wanna make things weird though and actu-” you’re watching him in adoration as he rambles on and avoids eye contact with you.

“Do what?” you ask through your giggle

“Well I really like you, Y/N. I’ve liked you for a long time now and I like talking to you, spending time with you.”

“Yeah.” you speak gently, that’s what makes shotaro take a deep breath and finally look at you.

“I just wanted to ask if you’d like to be my girlfriend?.”

“I-“ you begin to speak but he’s quick to cut you off before you could even answer him.

“You don’t have to give me an answer right now, just think about it and let me know when you’re ready.”

“I’ll definitely think about it.” You reach to give him a kiss on his cheek.

“Goodnight.”

What an eventful night, you think while walking into your apartment. Easily your feet shuffle to your bed and allow yourself to fall back.

Shotaros question leaves you confused. You wanted to say yes. It seemed like the obvious answer, and you would have agreed to his proposal the second he asked but the only thing standing in your way is Wonbin.

You turn in your bed and curl into a ball, taking the black garment beside you and using it as a pillow not noticing that it’s Wonbin’s hoodie until you recognize the large print written behind the hoodie.

Just as you throw the hoodie across the room there’s a knock at the door. It’s small and kinda shy so you think it’s shotaro and for the second night in a row you’re mistaken as you open to find Wonbin standing directly parallel from you.

You have nothing to say to him, you’re mad at him, you think. But you’re not entirely sure. You feel like you’re supposed to be upset and you’re supposed to be kicking him out of your apartment. You try to find the answer by just looking at him, but when you see him you see Wonbin. You love the man you see in front of you, and you hate that you do.

“Where’s your date?” You ask

“Probably at home.”

“Does she know you’re here?”

He invites himself in fully and closes the door behind him.

“I bet you'd like to know.”

“You were all touchy feely earlier, I’d think that you really liked her.”

“I don’t even know her name.”

“You’re a sick man,”

“You’re not any better, baby.

You knew you were just as bad. You were well aware. Both of you are using innocent people as pawns in this twisted game you liked to play.

“I’m not as bad as you.”

“So you don’t mind me telling shotaro about this?”

“Why would you do that?”

“Why shouldn’t i?”

He’s so close to you, that you feel his heat radiating on to you. But he’s not as close as you’d like him to be. That’s how you knew you were worse than he was. Because even with everything that just transpired tonight you wanted nothing more than to wrap your arms around his neck and kiss him until you're out of breath. Until his lips are red and swollen, until you finally understand what’s holding you back from fully committing to shotaro.

The question goes unanswered when your lips are tangled in his, not an inch in between your connecting bodies. Only thing to pull you away from each other is when you hear a single ring from your phone, telling you that someone texted.

You know who it is, and so does he. But it doesn’t stop you from pulling out your phone to check the message from shotaro telling you to sleep well.

This isn’t right, you feel at this exact moment that this isn’t right. You look up at Wonbin, your eyes easily finding him. Thinking that maybe this will set you straight. But all it does is remind you of how you got here in the first place.

Within a split second your lips are back on his again, they never leave. Even as he leads you to your bed to lay you down gently.

“This is the last time we’re doing this, so you better make it count.”

“Yes ma’am.” Is all he whispers in your ear before he begins leaving kisses down your collar bone.

Mornings after spending a night with Wonbin were the exact reason that you kept this going for so long. There’s nothing in the world more comforting than the beating of his heart mixed with sounds of chirping birds and light of the morning sun sneaking into your apartment.

There once was a time when you’d swore you wanted to lay here for eternity. But something today is different, because with the birds chirping and the sun dimly shining and his arms wrapped firmly around you. It just doesn’t feel the same, you can’t tell what’s changed.

But you know that the more you lay in bed with him the more you feel wrong.

“You’re awake?” He peeks down at you with sleepy eyes. The ones you loved waking up to, at least you used to. You don’t know what’s switched in you, but honestly you don’t wanna know. Now you finally have the strength to end this cycle that you’ve started.

His eyes are trained on you and you sit up and lean against your headboard.

“You should go.” You didn’t mean for it to come out as a whisper.

“What?”

“I want you to leave.”

He doesn’t ask anymore questions but you can tell he’s confused. You’re watching him in silence as he slips his clothes back on and you grab one of your favorite oversized band shirts to throw on.

“Can I call you later?”

“You won’t get an answer.”

The room goes silent again, while he collects his shoes, wallet, and phone and makes his way to the door.

“Wait.” You stop him before he walks out.

It’s almost fun to you when you see him turn back to you with shadows of hope ghosting over his expression.

“You forgot this.” You tease,

walking to him with his black hoodie.

“Goodbye, Wonbin.” You reach to plant a chaste kiss on his cheek.

Nobody notices how your eyes are glued to Wonbin when he takes a seat directly across from you. He pretends like he’s so focused on what Seunghan has to say but you know that’s not the case because when he laughs he looks at you.

It doesn’t occur to you until now that this whole kind of breakup thing isn’t going to be easy at all.

“So Y/N how’d your date go yesterday?” Karina turns the attention to you. You feel all eyes turn to your direction and including Wonbin’s who’s looking you through his eyebrows.

“We had a lot of fun.” You turn to shotaro hoping that maybe it will take your attention off of the man sitting across from you.

“Did you guys kiss?”

“You know they didn’t, they still act like 2nd graders when they touch hands.”

“Be careful, she’s not as innocent as she looks.”

Wonbin laughs while looking at you.

“Wait what? Y/n did you finally lose your virginity?”

The question causes you to cough aloud. Sure you weren’t innocent, but you definitely did not want to talk about your first sex experience in public to all of your guy friends and especially not with shotaro and Wonbin.

“I um… yeah, remember I told you guys.”

“Oh yeah, the guy from earlier this year. That you said made you wanna baby trap him with how good it was.”

“I don’t think I said all that.”

“Mm mm you said more.”

“I remember cause she was like-“

“Okay, that’s enough.” You stop them. Not only because it was a topic you’d rather not talk about in front of shotaro but also because the man that you wanted to “baby trap.” Was Wonbin

“Whatever happened to him?” Giselle asked

“She probably got bored and dropped him.” Wonbin snickers under his breath, not even bothering to look at you.

“Well, actually. I realized that we weren’t good for each other, and that I needed to be with someone who was good for more than just sex.”

“Amen girl.” Giselle adds

“Aww and now she has shotaro.”

“Honestly it sounds like an upgrade. What a douchebag.” Winter says while looking down at her food.

“But let’s be honest? Do you even like shotaro?” Wonbin blurts out. It takes not even 30 seconds for you to jump up and drag Wonbin away from the table by his wrist to a place where the rest of your friends can still see you but none of them can hear you.

All heads are turned towards the both of you as you yell at him for his unnecessary comments.

“What are they talking about?” Winter questions

“Don’t worry guys, I can read lips.” sohee says

“Okay she said something about the weather.”

“What the hell is wrong with you?” you ask frustratedly

“I just asked a question, but it clearly got you upset ” He smiles down at you.

“It’s none of your business.”

“Maybe not, but I feel like he deserves to know.” Wonbin gestures to shotaro who walks up behind you.

“What’s going on with you guys?”

“Nothing, we had a small argument yesterday and now he’s acting like a baby.” You answer shotaro while watching Wonbin.

“Do you need to talk it out?” Shotaro asks

“There’s nothing more to say.” Wonbin says nonchalantly while walking back to the table and grabbing his bag, throwing it over his shoulder while making his way past you.

“I’ll see you around.” Is all he says before walking off and leaving you and shotaro by yourself.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah.” You look down and notice shotaro’s hand is loosely wrapped around yours. You don’t really know when it got there but you figure that that’s the reason Wonbin decided to cut the conversation.

“I’m fine, sorry about all that.”

After the entire incident with Wonbin you really only see him around campus. Neither of you are brave enough to talk to each other or at least apologize.

No matter how many times shotaro has explained to you that he didn’t find offense in Wonbin’s question. Or that he just wants you guys to work it out because he hates seeing his two close friends fight.

Part of you wants to just be honest with him and tell him what the whole fight was really about. But the rest of you thinks about the guilt you’ll feel when you see his reaction.

As far as the rest of the friend group went, things were pretty awkward. They’d only have one of you around at a time to avoid any blow up again.

As time goes on, the more you’re reminded that you guys had that rule about not dating within the friend group. And with each passing moment you feel guilty, because you never intended for things to get this far.

Even though this situation was extremely stressful you still had Shotaro’s question lingering in the back of your mind and with everything going on the answer seemed even clearer than ever.

Especially if Wonbin was no longer in the picture.

“So shotaro asked me to be his girlfriend.” you start

“It’s about time.” Ningning speaks

“When?” karina asks

“2 weeks ago, after we went to the festival.” you answer

“And what did you say?” giselle asks

“I didn’t give him an answer yet. He told me to think about it.” you respond

“What is there to think about?” winter questions

“I don’t know, we just had that rule about dating within each other and I didn’t wanna break it.” You lie.

“When we made that rule, it never applied to you and shotaro.” karina says, rolling her eyes

“Girl, two weeks is long enough to think about it, call him right now.” ningning says picking up your phone and throwing it in your lap.

“I can’t do that.” you argue

“Yes you can, and you will.” ningning states

“I’ll just text him.” you mumble

“No, you need to call him.” giselle says sharply

Ignoring them, you open your messages and begin to type out your message.

You: I’ve been thinking about it a lot. And I think I'm ready to finally be your girlfriend.

The second you send the text you throw your phone down on the bed. Hands shielding your face as if it could aid in the embarrassment you feel. The girls all squealed as the message was sent.

“Girl what are you scared of, he asked you.” ningning says laughing

“I know but it’s still scary, what if he changed his mind.” you say

“I’m sure he didn’t.”

Right after winter speaks you hear three bells come from your phone. To inform you that you got three new messages from shotaro.

The anticipation is killing you alive. On one hand you wanna know what he said and on the other you’re too afraid to pick up your phone.

“Girl answer the phone.” giselle says

“I can’t.” you say pushing the phone away from you

“Okay fine, I’ll do it.” Karina picks up the phone to read the messages. That’s when you finally uncover your face and watch their reaction carefully.

If their faces weren’t enough to tell you that something was wrong, the collective “oh.” Should’ve done it for you.

“What? What’s wrong?” you ask

“Umm you might wanna see this yourself.” karina says with a tight smile

They passed your phone back so you could see what was happening.

Wonbin: when you said you wanted to end things, i didn’t think this is what you meant

But honestly I’m glad you finally texted me, I really missed you.

I'd like to see how this works out

“Wow“ you sat there staring at your phone screen

“How did you even do that?” winter says, her brows furrowed

“I don’t know, I had both of their contacts pinned and I guess I accidentally chose the wrong one.” you stress

“Chose the wrong one?” giselle asks, her brow raised

“Wait, why would you even have Wonbin’s contact pinned? And what does he mean to end things?” karina asks, looking to the other girls

It’s true what they say. What’s done in the dark comes to the light. No matter how good you think you are at hiding. The truth always comes out eventually.

“Umm.” you trail off

You try to figure out how to say things while the four girls sit there waiting for an answer.

“We’ve been talking for a while.” you mumble

“Talking like how?” they start

“Did you guys have sex?” winter asks

“We’ve dabbled.” you mutter

“Literally what does that even mean?” ningning says, squinting at you

“Yeah.” you sigh

“How many times?” Giselle asks

“Uh like 3 times.” You’re not sure if it’s accurate but 3 is the first number that pops up in your head, and you start to nod your head when you see a couple of the girls nodding in agreement.

“Okay that’s not too bad.” giselle responds.

“A week.” You finish.

They let out a collective “damn.” Which told you that its definitely a lot.

“I didn’t know he had all that in him.” Karina says with widened eyes

“Oh he’s definitely got all that.” The thought makes you smile a little.

“Wait, you and Wonbin? As in the pretty boy who would flirt with a plant if it had eyes.”

“Yeah~”

“How did this happen?”

“I don’t know, I don't know one day we were just talking. Next day… he was in my bed. I thought that it’d be the first and only time but-“

“You just couldn’t stay away.” giselle speaks what you were thinking, causing you to shake your head in shame.

“How long have you guys been.. Y’know seeing each other.” winter questions

“Since like February.” you answer

“That’s 9 months.” Winter calculates

“Oh you sneaky bitch.” Ningning shakes her head

It takes but only a few minutes for other truths to be revealed.

“Is that why he blew up at the table? He’s the guy you wanted to baby trap?”

“Yeah.” You look down

“And you did have his hoodie on that day?”

You didn’t have anything to say for yourself, you were just ashamed.

“I can’t believe you lied to me. To my face.”

“She’s been lying to all of us.”

“Hold up… you said you had sex in your bed…” Ningning pauses “in this bed?” She points down gesturing to the bed.

“Yeah? Why?” Your question is answered when they all immediately jump off the bed and scream.

“Come on guys, I washed the sheets.”

“When’s the last time you guys hooked up?” winter asks

“Well I wouldn't call it hooking up, I’d say more love making, we have emotions between us when we do what we do.”

“Answer the question.” they yell at you collectively, you’ve always found it amusing how in sync they were.

“When I went to the fall festival with Shotaro.”

“Was this before or after he popped the question?” giselle asks

“After…” you say while looking to the side.

“Wow, you’re evil.”

“Poor shotaro. You’ve been cheating on him this entire time.” Ningning sighs

“We were never dating.” you say

“Yeah and you never will with this type of behavior.” She adds

“You and Wonbin? I’m still trying to imagine it.” Karina says

“I Can Girl, and it is not a pretty sight.” Giselle responds

The voices of the other girls are drowned out when you stare at the messages that Wonbin sent you. “I missed you.” Pops out the most to you. You bite your lip thinking about being exclusive with him.

While you’re still reviewing the text you see the text bubbles arise leaving you anxious to see what he’s about to say next.

Whilst going over the messages there’s a knock at the door. You along with all of the girls towards the door and they all turn to look at you.

“I think it’s your man.” Ningning teases

“God I hope not.”

“Well hurry and answer it.” Winter rushes you

Your feet drag towards the door, not really wanting to face him right now and especially not when you have your girls watching you.

However everything goes out of the window when you see his face. You don’t remember why you were fighting and start to question how you thought you could go without seeing him like this again.

“Oh guys, it’s wonbin. Ha ha.”

“What are you doing here?”

You don’t need to look to know that the girls are watching you like you’re on drugs. So instead of carrying this act on further you just stand back and let him in.

“Just.. come in.”

“You know what, now that I’ve seen it. I totally get it.” Karina admits

“Me too. They’d have the cutest babies.” Ningning exclaims

“Babies?” You question

“They’d be annoying too, please wear protection?” Winter adds

“Our babies wouldn’t be…” you stop when you realize what it is you’re saying. “There aren’t gonna be any babies.”

“Sure.” one of them say sarcastically

They all make their way to the entrance and start to leave. The last one to go is Ningning who looks at both of you one last time and says.

“No, you definitely chose the right one.” Before smiling at you and leaving you to answer Wonbin’s new set of questions.

“What’s she talking about?”

“We were talking about my apartment unit. I was questioning whether I got the right layout or not.”

Wonbin was right, you weren’t at all as innocent as you looked. Your ability to come up with a clever lie on the spot was a talent that you praised yourself on. All the practicing was really paying off.

“What made you change your mind? about us?” He placed his hands on each side of your hips and asked.

“Well we were talking and I realized that I couldn’t hide it anymore.”

Boyfriend Wonbin was completely different from hookup Wonbin. PDA was his love language, which you were still getting used to.

The campus is full of students just trying to go about their day and get to their next activity. You easily blend in as one of those fairly busy students. Just making your way down the campus field when you hear your name being called from behind you.

“Let me walk you to class.” He says while cuffing your hands with his.

You hesitate to answer.

“Um okay.”

As soon as those words leave your mouth his fingers are intertwined in yours. Now walking through campus just simply holding hands has your heart racing.

Constantly looking over your shoulder to see if there’s actually eyes on you or if you're just hallucinating.

When your relationship was hidden you imagined things like this, holding his hand in public for everyone to see. Claiming him as yours. But now that you had the opportunity you were paranoid.

You’re not sure what you’re scared of until you see the girl who’s name you never learned, talking with her friends right in front of your class

“Text me when you get out of class.”

“Yeah.. okay.”

You say while still eyeing the brown haired girl opposite of him. You don’t know her but you feel extremely guilty about what you’ve dragged her into.

you only pull your eyes away when he uses his first two fingers and guides your face towards him. “I'm right here, baby.”

“don’t call me that, what if they hear you.”

“hear what? me talking to my girlfri-“

the second you begin to hear the “g” word you push your lips on his to shush him up. it wasn’t the best thing to do but it just happened instinctively.

and now you were beyond embarrassed.

“I'll see you later.”

When you turn away to go into class he pulls you back and places a softer kiss on your lips.

“Study hard.” he cheers you on as you walk into the classroom.

“Do you have yesterday's notes, I left my laptop with Wonbin.” Shotaro nudges you.

“Yeah, of course. how is he by the way, it’s been a while since we talked.” you ask.

“really? I thought he said he was with you a few days ago?” he questions

“Umm, now that I think about it. We did hang out a little. I forgot about it for a second, sorry.”

“I'm glad you guys are getting along again.”

you feel it again, the guilt.

“I mean things are still a little awkward, we’re not that close.” You lie again.

“It’s still progress.”

It was definitely progress just not in the way that he thinks.

Your hour and 30 minute class felt like an eternity. With shotaro right beside you and wonbin’s former date in front of you, you felt like the walls were closing in on you.

The second class is over, you make a run for it. Quickly tossing your bag over your shoulder and scurrying out before shotaro or anyone else could stop you. But as soon as you step out of the classroom door you’re met with a smiley Wonbin waiting patiently for you.

“How was class?” he asks while slipping his hands into yours and swinging his arms back and forth.

You’d love to just sit and talk with him, but only of course in the privacy of your apartment. Not here where Shotaro could easily see you, holding hands with the one person that you just told him you haven’t heard from.

Wonbin observes when you gently pull your hand from his and back away from him. “It was okay, I’m kinda busy though now. So I’m gonna-”

“Wonbin, what are you doing over here? Isn’t your class across campus?” shotaro walks out with an unknowing smile hanging between his cheeks.

“To pick up-”

“He said he was here to give you your laptop back.”

You stop him mid sentence and wrap your arm around his shoulder to stop him from grabbing your hand again. You can feel the heat of Wonbins eyes watching you but you try to ignore it as you keep focused on shotaro.

“I don’t have it with me.” he says confused,

The two of them standing in front of you at the same time makes your heart pound outside of your chest. Scared that Shotaro might reveal that he asked you to be his girlfriend, or that wonbin might uncover that you’re his girlfriend.. So what would anyone do in these kinds of situations? Lie. You were already doing that a ton these days.

“That’s interesting, well we’ll see you later. Wonbin and I have a project to finish up,” you say in a hurry, pulling Wonbin away by his wrist before either of them could question anything.

Spending everyday hiding and lying to everyone was more tiring than you thought it'd be. But despite all of that there were a few positives to this relationship with your newfound boyfriend.. Things like sitting with legs horizontally across his lap while he goes over the notes for his history class.

There’s nothing to be said, it’s completely silent other than the sounds coming from the world outside of your apartment. You liked it this way. Just being in silence with him, skin on skin, heartbeats in sync. Your fingers playing in his hair out of habit, watching him carefully review the contents of his lap. When you notice a little black leather book hanging out of his bag.

“What’s this?” you say while leaning over to pick it up. Wonbin only looks up at you and then towards the book that you’re leaning to get and immediately he reaches to get it before you do.

“Just a notebook.” he says, holding it away from you.

“Well let me see it, it’s pretty.”

“It’s nothing.”

“Just let me see it.” you whine while pushing yourself further over top of him just to reach the notebook in his hand. By the time you finally get to the notebook, you let out a small giggle of victory. And run on the other side of the room.

The book isn’t too big, just big enough to fit into the palm of your hand with a small latch on the front and some small pattern art indented onto the front and the back. You don’t think to open it until he says “Okay, you’ve seen it. Give it back.”

“I’m not done looking.” you tease inspecting the book more, unlatching the hook to read the contents inside the book.

“Ooh Is this your poetry? I didn’t know you write.”

He’s talking but you don’t hear anything he says when you begin to read a random page of the small book aloud.

Fragile like a butterfly, soft like the petals of a healthy rose. You're stuck in my brain like lyrics to a catchy song. If you were a book I'd read you over and over again. If you were a movie I'd watch you repeatedly, but you don't have to be a book or a movie for me to enjoy watching you, reading the scriptures of your eyes like literature. feeling the texture of your skin as if you were made from braille. holding onto your hips as if the flesh of your body was the only source to eternal life. breathing in your scent as if you were made from the finest perfume.

cherishing you now, because I know I'll never find anything better.

“Aww you’re so romantic.” you tease again before finding another random page to read.

What do you call this?

the feeling I get in my stomach when I see you? the emotions I feel when you kiss me. the pit in my stomach when I see you smiling with someone else.

Is this what love feels like?

What do you call it when I start to smile to myself when I see something that reminds me of you.

when there's no one else in the world that makes me feel the way you do.

Is this what love feels like?

What do I do when you don't feel the same way? when loving you feels like self-inflicted torture. when you're both the remedy and sickness.

I hope this isn't what love feels like.

“Wait, is this…”you begin asking but trail off when you realize it's probably not what you’re thinking.

“All of these are about you.”

“Why?” you say the first thing that comes to mind, but retract shortly after you redirect the question. “I didn’t know you felt this way?”

You keep your eyes on him even as he stands up and walks over to you. “You really couldn’t tell?”

“How could I, when you’re always talking and flirting with someone new in front of me. Or that girl from the festival? You know you don’t really do a good job at showing people you care for them.”

“Okay so how do you feel?” he redirects the focus onto you.

“I really really like you obviously?” he’s looking at you but you’re trying to look everywhere else but in his direction. He’s watching you like he’s waiting for you to say something else, and you both know what he’s expecting you to say.

“I love you. I really love you. You don’t need me to tell you that.”

“I do, I need you to tell me everyday.”

By now you’re speechless. Not because you have nothing to say but because you have so much to say you don’t even know where to start. You could tell him that you’ve been in love with him for so long that it felt like forever or you could tell him that he’s crazy for not knowing how you felt about him. Or you could just kiss him, because that should be enough to say everything all at once without saying anything at all. And that’s what you choose.

As more time goes on you feel that Ningning was right. You definitely did choose the right one, there wasn’t anyone else that fit you better than wonbin. Shotaro was close but he just wasn’t the same. You don’t know what it is about him that you love, but being with him just puts your mind at ease.

you’d gotten more comfortable with doing a couple things in public. things like holding hands, and kissing. that is of course until you spot shotaro walking up, that’s when you pull your hand away and make up some silly lie that you have to get something from your car.

or other times where you didn’t have time to run away so you just have to push wonbin away and lie about his hands being sweaty.

you were getting more creative with the lies.

“today we should go for frozen yogurt.” wonbin speaks while swinging your arms together.

“ooh i’ve been wanting ice cream.”

“I said frozen yogurt…“

“oh my god what is that?”

“what’s what?”

“I think I just saw a huge rat run that way, we’ll just have to take the stairs.”

“a rat?”

“yeah it was huge, come on. this way.” you try to hurry and pull him away but he isn’t budging. still searching for the rat that you claimed to have seen.

“where?”

there wasn’t a rat, it was just sohee. walking towards you with a bright teeth showing smile and glistening eyes. like he always does.

“Hey guys.”

“Sohee~” you drag out his name, as he approaches you and wonbin. By now you’d given up on trying to break physical contact with Wonbin. He shifted his hand from yours to wrapping his arm around your waist, and rested his chin right on your shoulder.

“Have you seen Shotaro?”

“No. I don’t think so.”

“Oh, He’s looking for you. By the way, how did you do in the history term?’

“I aced it.” you giggle excitedly.

“That’s my girl.” You blush when wonbin kisses your cheek as a reward.

“What about you?” Judging by his face you can tell that he didn’t do too well but you still wait for his answer giving him the benefit of the doubt.

“I think it’s time for me to find a new life path.” he trails off closer to the end.

“Oh come on it couldn’t have been that bad.” you say hopefully

“The professor told me to start looking for a new life path.”

“Oh…” both you and wonbin say at the same time.

“I’m thinking about maybe just starting my own bakery.”

“I didn’t know you baked?” wonbin adds

“I don’t, but I mean how hard could it be?” He finishes with a shrug of his shoulders

“You’ve burnt french fries in the microwave.” You remind him.

“I thought the tin foil would make it heat up faster.'' Sohee defends himself, but he really doesn't need to. You were there when Karina told him that putting foil in the microwave would save 99% of his time. And did he believe her? Well, yes. Yes he did.

“yea…” you start but you don’t really have anything to say. Sohee wasn't the brightest but he was adorable and he had a good heart.

“Anyways, I’m going to join the rest of the crew in the food court. You guys coming?” He asks

“Yeah, we’ll be there soon.” You answer.

“Kk bye.” he says while walking past you towards the food court.

—--

“Have you guys seen Y/N?” shotaro asks while sitting down at the table with his tray of food in his hands.

“I haven’t seen her all day, I don’t think.” Giselle answers while picking up her phone to see if you responded to the message she sent you earlier.

“Neither have I.” Ningning confirms while looking around the area.

“Did she come today?” karina ask

“I hope so, I asked her something a while ago and i’m waiting for her to give me an answer?” shotaro admits. His statement makes all the girls look at eachother, trying to come up with a way to cover for you without looking suspicious. Luckily just in the nick of time sohee walks over to the table with seunghan.

“Sohee, Have you seen Y/N?” Winter asks before he could even take a seat.

“Uh yeah she was with wonbin.” Sohee says without a second thought.

“Those two have been real close lately.” seunghan adds

Ningning, karina and winter all exchange looks while Giselle looks to shotaro to make sure he doesn’t pick up on what’s going on. “They’re not as close as you’d think.” she defends you

“Yeah, are you sure they were together?” Ningning questions, even though she knew the answer.

“Yeah. positive. I told her that shotaro was looking for her, and wonbin had his arm around her which I thought was weird but maybe- OW.’ sohee stops when Karina kicks him under the table.

“Are you really sure it was Y/n?”

“I’m very sure.” he says while looking around the table to find everyone giving him unbelieving stares. “Guys, come on, I know Y/n when I see her, I’m not stupid.” he looked around once again hoping that maybe someone would believe him but instead the table just burst into a collective laugh.

“Says the one who mixed bleach with ammonia and layed on the floor for five hours because you thought you were dead.” ningning giggles

“Says the one who thought Antarctica and amnesia were the same thing.” Giselle adds.

“Says the one who microwaved their fork and killed our microwave for the fifth time.” Seunghan comes in.

“What is it with you and microwaves?” Winter questions and causes the table to erupt in laughter again.

“Okay so I’m not mr einstein.”

“Far from it.” Suenghan says under his breath

“Like galaxies away from it.” winter mocks

“Oh come on? You guys have made mistakes too.”

“Yes, but none of us have put toothpaste on a cracked phone because a random youtuber told us to.” Winter responds

“I just know your guardian angels are stressed.” Karina laughs.

“Should I just call her?” shotaro speaks up and the whole table goes silent. The girls are trying to figure out what to say to keep him from stressing out too much over you, and sohee is still trying to think of a comeback that won’t get him clowned again.

“Yeah, or maybe just text her. She might be busy right now.”

You don’t know if “busy” was the word you’d use to describe what it was you were doing with wonbin in the janitor's closet, but you could definitely say you were too occupied to answer any phone calls, including one’s from Shotaro.

“Yeah, I’ll just text her.” he agrees lowly while pulling out his phone and shooting you a text. You heard your phone vibrate but you simply ignored it as wonbin continued to kiss you, pushing you further against the wall knocking down the brooms and mops beside you.

After missing 20 minutes of your next class you finally get time to read the messages on your phone. Which makes your heart drop, you wonder if you’re ever going to get to a point in your relationship where you don’t feel guilty for being with wonbin.

Taro:) : Are you busy?

Taro:) : Can we talk?

You don’t even know how to answer him when you’re right beside wonbin. Who’s watching you read the messages with a frowned expression written all over your face.

“What’s wrong?” he asks while reading the text on your screen.

“Nothing.” you mumble while clicking your phone off and placing it in your back pocket. “I just have to hurry and get to my next class. I’m not usually this late.”

“What does he wanna talk about?” wonbin asks, not giving you the chance to escape the topic.

“I don’t know. It’s probably an assignment or something.”

“Assignments don’t usually make you this upset.”

“I’m not upset.” you shout just a little, enough to startle the both of you.

“I’m not too convinced.”

“There’s nothing wrong, I just have to go before I’m even more late than I already am.”

“Okay then let me walk you there,”

“I’m fine going by myself.” while walking away, your steps come out more like stomps as you get away from him. You didn’t mean to take your frustration out on him, you just needed time to yourself to think. There was only a matter of time before Shotaro asked for your answer, and you just didn't know what you were going to tell him.

You just didn’t expect that time to be now, as you run tight into shotaro not too far from where you left Wonbin.

“Hey? You’re here.”

“Yeah, Sorry I’m really late for class.” you rush, trying to avoid eye contact with him.

“Can we talk on the way?” He stops you so you can’t rush off again. He’s looking at you like he really needs to talk but you don’t know how to say “No.” Already knowing exactly what it is he wanted to talk about. “We’ll have to talk after class, I’m already super late. I’m sorry.” You slowly run holding up your hands together as a way to say sorry.

You think you’ll find peace in your history lecture. Maybe learning about events that were completely irrelevant to you will make you forget about the web of lies that you’ve wrapped yourself into. However your thoughts are going a mile a minute, trying to think about how you’re going to approach Shotaro after class.

Anxiously tapping your pencil at your notebook, watching the numbers increase each time the minute changes and changing focus from the lecture to the small black notebook peeking out from under your other notebooks.

You’re trying to avoid its non-existent gaze on you, but it’s basically screaming “read me, read me.” so you obey. Slowly reaching to pick up the book and unlatch the hook. Going to read the very first page.

Being with you is like listening to the waves crash upon the shore's surface at night. Peaceful and calming, but I never know when the waves are going to crash too close. Serenity and excitement, you're like the different shades of green. like spring rain and winter snow, you're the beautiful parts of life that no one would ever want to live without.

Well that wasn’t a good idea, you think to yourself as you're now on the verge of tears in the middle of class. Yet it still doesn’t stop you from reading more confessions from the book. Turning pages as the seconds went by with more and more tears streaming down your cheek.

You find again that Ningning was right, not that you really needed any more convincing. But now it’s just too obvious, there’s no one else for you other than Park Wonbin and with that your mind's made up. Once you see Shotaro again, you’re just gonna be completely honest with him. No more lying, no more hiding and no more leading him on. You’re just going to tell him everything.

“Yeah sure you can come over tonight.” You smile at Shotaro.

Well that wasn’t the plan. It seemed so much easier when you were only thinking about it, but seeing his face light up when you called his name, and the excitement that lingered in his voice when he asked to come over got the best of you. That feeling of shame teasing at you once again.

So now here you are, alone in your apartment with shotaro. It’s funny to think that you were just here in this same place with wonbin the night prior. Actually funny isn’t the word you’d use to describe it, maybe more like nauseating. The way he’s looking at you, the way you wish it were your boyfriend here filling his place instead. The way you feel the words sit heavy on your tongue but you just can’t seem to say them aloud.

“I’m dating Wonbin.” you think to yourself over and over again. If you think about it long enough you’ll just say it eventually. But you don’t, it never comes out. In fact nothing really comes out. The room is filled with awkwardness, you feel it and shotaro does too. The kind of awkwardness that you’ve never felt with shotaro before and you don’t know how that makes you feel.

Well you know it doesn’t feel good, that’s for sure. You never wanted your relationship with wonbin to change your relationship with the rest of your friends and especially not Shotaro. But things happen, and it’s funny how they do. Because Shotaro was here first, you had a crush on him for the longest time, when did it change from you and Shotaro to you and wonbin.

“You missed it, everyone was making fun of Sohee and microwaves today.” Shotaro speaks up trying to cover the weird silence, but you don’t help when you only laugh lightly.

“Do you remember when he thought he had superpowers and could see at night.”

“And he fell down the stairs.” you finish his sentence off. “Yeah that was so funny. He’s so funny.”

It’s not as quiet anymore but god is it still really awkward. You know all of this could be solved if one of you addresses the elephant in the room, and you hoped it would be him because you just didn’t have the balls to do it.

“So…”

“Yeah.” you hurriedly speak, assuming what he’s going to say.

“There’s an art exhibit tomorrow happening near the school.” You can’t help the way your heart drops when he begins to talk. “I already got 2 tickets, hoping that maybe we could go together.”

“Fuck.” you think. That’s definitely not what you were expecting him to say, and now you’re trying your best to control your facial expression. This should’ve been the time for you to come clean, for you to just lay it all out. But you’re a coward, so instead you give him a small smile and agree to go on yet another date with him.

Was this cheating? You’re not sure but it’s definitely debatable. Going on a date with a friend that you knew was very into you while you had a boyfriend. But does it count if he wasn’t supposed to be your boyfriend in the first place?

It was wrong, that’s for sure. But to be honest, when have you done anything right? You see the way he leaves your apartment with a hopeful expression. Knowing that he’s gonna go back to his place and think about you.

And that’s the very thought that keeps you up all night.

“You look like shit.” Ningning says as she approaches you. She was right, you had bags under your eyes, you’d thrown on a random t-shirt and you didn’t even bother to fix your hair this morning.

“Thanks.”

“Sorry, I mean. Ooh you look like shit, what happened?” she says in a gentler, more sincere tone this time.

“I just couldn’t sleep last night.”

“Damn, ya’ll went all night?” she whispers this time.

“What? No. I just couldn’t sleep.” you choose to leave out all the details as to why you were up most of the night.

“Are you going through withdrawals?”

“Withdrawals?”

“You know…” she motions her arms into a humping motion “withdrawals.”

“Why is everything about sex with you?”

“I don’t know actually?” she turns her head to the side as she actually begins to think about your question.

“Anyways, what are you doing later today?”

“Shotaro and I are going to see the art exhibit?”

“You and Shotaro?” she asks with one eyebrow cocked up.

“Like a date?” she continues.

“I think that’s what he thinks.” you sigh.

“So, you still haven’t told him yet?”

“I just can’t find the right words.” your lips go into a pout.

“I’m. Fucking. Wonbin. Three words.” she says putting an emphasis on the first three words.

“It’s not that easy?” you throw your hands up.

“Okay so how are you going to tell wonbin?” she asks, referring to your date with Shotaro.

“Tell me what?” wonbin walks up behind you casually wrapping his arms around your waist and greeting your cheek with a kiss.

“Tell you about how much she loves you” Ningning gleams.

“That I have a date with Shotaro.” You state bluntly.

“A date?” he asks, pulling himself away from you.

“Well he thinks it's a date.” you add before he could get too upset.

“And I think it’s my time to go.” ningning says, pointing her thumb in another direction before sneaking off.

“Why does he think that?” Wonbin asks, and you could see that he was very obviously getting irritated.

You take your time to answer him, not knowing exactly how to put it.

“I haven’t told him… about us.. Yet.” you drag out, while playing with the hem of your shirt, and avoiding eye contact.

“And why not?”

“Well he asked me to be his girlfriend.” you admit looking to the side.

“And?”

“I still haven’t given him an answer?” you spill out yet another confession.

“Do you like him?”

“Not anymore.” you look up gaging his expression.

“Not anymore?”

“Well, to be honest. Shotaro had asked me to be his girlfriend, and he told me to think about it. And when I thought about it I figured that I should just be with him, because I didn’t think that you really cared about me so I went to text him but I accidentally texted you and now we're dating.”

“Wait, what?”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for this to happen. But I don’t like shotaro like that. I love you, it’s been you for a long time.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?”

“I’m really sorry wonbin, please understand.” you plead, reaching for his hand but he’s quick to snatch it away.

“Have fun with Shotaro, Y/N,” is all he says before he walks away.

Great, you looked and now you felt like shit. You really didn’t mean for any of this to happen, and now you don’t know what you’re gonna do. You also don’t know why it took this for you to realize just how much you really loved wonbin. Because seeing him pull his hand away from you and the pain in his eyes was enough to knock the wind right out of your lungs.

You’re walking with Shotaro through the exhibit seeing art that’d usually have you in awe, but at the moment you just don’t have enough energy to really care about the beautiful pieces in front of you. Just small hums here and there when shotaro expresses how interesting he thinks everything is. It only takes a few bland answers for him to finally stop you and ask what’s wrong.

“You seem down? Is everything okay?”

“Yeah…”

“What’s wrong?”

Before you thought of Shotaro as a lover, he was your friend. You used to feel comfortable telling him anything, and you missed that. Really because right now, you could use your friend.

“Wonbin broke up with me.” you let out, and he pauses before he says anything.

“What do you mean?”

“I haven’t been completely honest with you.” you say

“Okay?”

You wanna tell him everything, but you don’t know where to start. So, you start at the beginning. You tell him that the both of you have been seeing each other for months, you explain everything that happened after the festival, and you tell him about the contact slip up.

“Umm, wow.”

“I’m sorry I should’ve told you all of this sooner, I just didn’t wanna ruin anything.”

“So you like, really like Wonbin?”

“I do yeah.”

“Then why are you here?”

“Huh?”

“Go get him, go.” He rushes you off. And you listen to him, heading towards the exit with your phone in your hand, and Wonbin’s contact on your screen. You tried calling him a few times but it went directly to voicemail each time.

When calling doesn’t work you decide to just show up in front of his apartment. You had a game plan on the way there but everything went out of the window when you were standing there face to face with his door. You hold your hand up to knock but you don’t, instead you just keep your hand up contemplating if this is a good idea or not. After a few seconds you tap the door a few times with your knuckles and wait to see if he’ll answer the door.

When he doesn’t you knock again, and gasp when he opens the door on the second knock.

“What?” Is the single word that leaves his mouth when sees you.

“I told Shotaro about us,” You say quietly, hoping that it would be enough for him to forgive you.

“Us?” He questions, and that’s when you audibly hear your heart drop and shatter. Tears are threatening to fall and your hands begin tugging at your clothes.

“Please don’t do this Wonbin.” you cry.

“I’m only correcting the mistake you made.” He speaks bluntly showing no reaction to your tears.

“I already told you that I only want you. I only agreed to date him because I thought my feelings for you weren’t reciprocated.” you explain.

“How do you expect me to feel knowing that you never had intentions to be with me, knowing that you were going to choose him instead?”

“You can’t blame me for having my doubts,when before we got together you were flirting with every girl on the campus.”

“Only to get a reaction out of you.” he confesses

“Why would you do that?”

Wonbin had a horrible way of communicating, so rather than just telling you that he really wanted to be with you, he talked and entertained random innocent girls where he knew you could see him. Thinking that if you got upset you’d do something about it. Plus he loved seeing you get all mad and possessive over him.

“I don’t know, I just wanted to know how you felt.”

“I love you wonbin, god I really fucking love you. If you’re ever wondering how I feel just ask me. I hate seeing you with someone else-” You stop for a moment when you notice how he’s looking at you. His expression is very different from the one he had when he opened the door a few moments ago.

It’s softer now, he’s watching you like he can read the words that leave your lips. It's similar to the look he usually gives you when he's listening to you talk about something you care about, but this one is more intense.

“It makes me wanna rip my heart out of my chest.” you finish.

He’s not saying anything, and it scares you. Part of you wants to read his mind, find out what he’s thinking. And the rest of you? Well, you want to disappear.

“Please say something.” you almost whisper, feeling the urge to cry again after your first set of tears begin to dry.

Instead of saying anything he gradually gets closer to you while maintaining eye contact, and it has your heart racing because he still isn’t saying anything. The only time your heart calms is when he gently places his lips on yours and pulls you into his apartment by your waist.

This kiss feels different than all the other kisses you’ve shared, this time you didn’t feel like you were doing anything wrong, it was romantic and honest. Filled with passion and pure love, the kiss feels like the kisses described only in fairy tales.

“Does this mean you forgive me?” you ask when you break the kiss, smiling at his pink soft and swollen lips.

“I forgave you the second you knocked on the door.”

183 notes · View notes

viewlumia · 3 months

Text

Nothing will be more weirder than the Ninjago fandom acting like Cole was in love with Nya throughout Rebooted.

Through the entire Love Triangle ordeal, he never actually acts for Nya, instead only reacting to Jay. Observe:

Blackout

In the previous episode, The Art of the Silent Fist, there was a scene between Cole and Nya. Throughout that episode, Nya was struggling with her newfound feelings towards Cole (given to her by a machine I might add but that's a conversation for another day). Nya talks to Cole in that scene and it ends with them holding hands and Cole jokingly saying "Don't tell Jay."

Why am I bringing this up? Because I honestly have trouble looking at that through a romantic lense. I often see people use this as evidence even though it doesn't match up with how the show would later indicate romance (they looked at each other so they're in love now! Chemistry, what's that!) More importantly, Nya never actually articulates her feelings for Cole in this scene. This is crucial when getting to Blackout. In Blackout, after Pixal blurts out that Cole is a perfect match for Nya, not Jay, who entered the room at the time, his first instinct is to attack Cole as soon as he saw him! From the POV of Cole, this looks like his friend calling him names and a whole lot of other things seemingly out of nowhere, he never actually heard about the "Perfect Match" results and that combined with the previously mentioned scene leaves us with a Cole who isn't in love with Nya and is only focused on Jay.

The Curse of The Golden Master

In this clip, after the ninja head into the sewer like a certain other group of color coded ninja, Jay gets into another spat with Cole after Cole dared to *checks note* look out for Nya's safety. This causes the two to get into an argument and ignore Nya falling from the broken ladder.

Now this scene on it's own doesn't mean much, but when paired with the other episodes mentioned, it starts to paint a bigger picture. This scene is a tipping point for Cole, going from someone clueless about his situation and fighting with Jay to letting this petty, near one-sided rivalry get in the way of the task at hand.

This scene is honestly the perfect representation of the Love Triangle in Rebooted: it was never really about Nya, she was just a stepping stone to get to Jay yelling at Cole over a situation he has no idea he's even in. Cole isn't out of the woodwork either as he begins to ignore Nya solely so he can insult Jay, but hey, it can't get any worse right?

Codename: Arcturus

It got worse.

In Codename: Arcturus, we see Jay, Cole, and Nya at the movie theater to "prove who Nya should go out with." Now, you may ask "doesn't that sequence end with both Jay and Cole asking who Nya will date and her kidnapping a cleaning robot?" yes, it does! But the important thing here is that it wasn't even Nya's idea in the first place ("Hey, it wasn't my idea to go on a double date to decide between you two.") Interesting thing of note, this is the only episode in the entire season where it's actually shown Cole fighting for Nya's affection, but even then it's not really about her, it's about getting back at Jay more than anything.

I know someone will come in wondering about "authorial intent," the intent in question being that Cole could be a potential love interest for Nya moving forward, but while I can see the intent, I can also acknowledge that what actually landed on the page and later the screen does not match the intent at all. Instead of Cole falling in love with Nya and getting into a spat with Jay that way, we got Cole treating Nya like a stepping stone to get back at Jay, disregarding her feelings in the process.

TL;DR: Kai should've knocked Jay and Cole upside the head for being weird about his sister

#I did not intend for this to become an analysis but here we are #I would love to hear your thoughts and rebuttals on this anaylsis #please i need human interaction #honestly i formatted this really bad so hopefully this makes sense #ninjago #ninjago analysis #cole brookstone #jay walker #nya smith #nya jiang #jay ninjago #nya ninjago #cole ninjago #ninjago cole #ninjago nya #ninjago jay

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yojeongin · 1 year

Text

happy together | m.l + l.dh [FINALE]

→husband!lee haechan x reader x bff!mark lee

genre: smut, angst, hurt, marriage au, love triangle, forbidden affair, friends to secret lovers, 90s/00's au

synopsis: with you by his side, mark's convinced things are finally going his way. his mind is set on his plans but haechan has plans of his own that also include you.

warning(s): ADULTS ONLY, MINORS DO NOT INTERACT! toxic marriage, mutual infidelity, morally grey characters, jealousy, distrust, possessiveness, fingering, finger sucking, unprotected sex, public sex, oral sex, mild sadomasochism, hair pulling and scratching kink, accidental voyeurism, biting kink, pet names, lots of making out, manipulation, all parties purposely hurting each other, smoking, mentions of death.

wc: 29.5k+ || soundtrack || ao3

part 1 | epilogue

disclaimer: this is purely fictional; in no way am I condoning this behavior, trying to offend anyone, nor is it meant to place such image on the idol, these are ONLY characters. read at your own discretion.

an: legend says ella y yo by don omar y romeo santos was made after hyuck confronted mark about the affair lmfao. ik I said morally grey but... they border on evil atp kinda. the epilogue will be mark centered, there's no hyuck or happy together yn but mark's actions there will be consequences of what happens to him here. don't be confused it will be mark x reader just know epilogue yn isn't the same as happy together yn lol.

The leaves had long fallen by the time you and Mark continued what started that afternoon at the lake. From early October to late December with a few days left of 1999, all that’s left is the inquiry of how the year would end.

But right now that didn’t matter to either you or him. Not when he had you perched on the counter. The cold ceramic against your ass makes you squeal with every single one of his thrusts. His upper half was bare. Shoulders littered with red marks from your fingernails and teeth prints elicited by his every stroke.

Mark felt swollen and warm inside you. Every movement made the both of you hyper-sensitive knowing an orgasm was soon to come. Your clothed upper half absorbing all his sweat and yours. Almost rasping his chest to a burning extent but he doesn’t complain, as long as you’re close.

His breath tickled your neck; the hairs on your nape stood whenever his lips landed on the flesh; restraining themselves from juvenile markings. Your lips parted whenever his teeth nipped the skin. His tongue eased the slight pain from his actions to repeat them until you pulled his head by his hair, bringing his mouth to yours.

With every tug of his hair, Mark’s pace increased and your whining became louder; pulling your hips closer to his. His hands were warm against you, perspiration making his clinging easy. Soft to the touch and in need of more.

“Fuck I’m going to—“ he halted, feeling spurts come out in strings while you held him closer to you. “Yeah?” You ask, kissing the side of his face. Your insides coil in pleasure with every thrust along the friction of his pelvic bone against your clit.

“I’m going to cum!” He exclaimed, holding even tighter to you. Every time you two found yourself in this situation he held you like this, scared that if he didn’t you’ll feel like he didn’t need you enough. Almost as a tactic to make you crave his touch and affection.

You caressed his hair, hand dropping its grip to let your fingers cradle his head as he thrusts within you. Pistoning at a cruel pace but anything for either of you to reach your highs. Feeling him within your walls, touching every crevice with his cock.

In a matter of seconds with a few more thrusts from him, you felt yourself come undone. Your moans mixed with whines that he swallowed when slotting his lips with yours, ensuing in a sloppy kiss. He came second, pulling out when he felt he couldn’t hold off anymore and ropes of cum latched themselves onto your thighs.

Even after, he didn’t pull away from you. His left arm wrapped around your shoulder and his right around your waist, grasp as tight as before. Yours was loose on him, arms trembling while trying to cool off; Breathing heavily against his bare hot skin.

It was then that it dawned upon you two that the buzzer and the home phone were ringing maniacally. You tried pushing him off to see who was this desperate to get in touch but he didn’t budge. His fingers only dug into you. Your eyes widened at his actions. This has become quite normal in the past months that you’re starting to accept it but not too fond of it.

The home phone that stopped ringing and his own abandoned one beside the both of you began with anger rooted in. Mark swallowed the lump that had gotten stuck in his throat when seeing the caller ID. He threw you a glance, putting his finger up to his lips as advice.

“Hyuck? What’s up, dude?” His hand pushed you closer to him.

“Where the fuck are you guys at? I’ve been calling, ringing the buzzer, leaving voicemails, even paging you both, and not one response. What the fuck?”

He paced around feeling defeated by the cold; phone to his ear gripping it without a fear that the plastic would pop off. You could hear him; so much anger in his voice, exasperation from the unknown. That desperation made your insides flip, satisfied with his frustrations.

“Oh sorry, we’re in the room working on a piece. The music was all the way up.” Mark‘s fingers began caressing your skin, hoping you’d make a noise but nothing came out of you. He wasn’t lying about the music or the piece but that was long before you two had decided to act on any carnal instincts.

“Can one of you buzz me in? it’s fucking cold and there’s no one in the lobby. I couldn’t find my keys in the morning either.” His chattering teeth product of this horrid winter in the city. His words had made you realize the bathroom window was open and along the honking of cars outside, the biting breeze entered in swirls. Piercing your exposed skin the longer Mark held you there while working to remove the smell of sex.

“Uh, yeah— yeah, give us a few secs to wash off. It got messy, ha.” He looked at you, but your eyes were nowhere insight. “Alright, plea—“ Mark didn’t let him finish. He ends the call, tossing the phone towards the wall and letting the already chipped-off paint smear itself more.

He didn’t move; cooling down before he was to let you go and begin to clean off. Looking into the mirror behind you. Mark didn’t want to admit it but he was beginning to hate the act of sneaking around and fucking his best friend’s wife on the time windows he wasn’t home. It didn’t help that after a month, Hyuck was coming home earlier than usual, decreasing his time with you.

Mark knew he shouldn’t have gotten attached. Even when he used the excuse of Hyuck being a complete shit to you; on a moral scale, Mark would be in the wrong too. Especially when you’re his childhood best friend’s wife.

But with all that moral guilt, Mark wasn’t sorry for being with you. He loved the feeling he got when sneaking around. He loves when he’s buried deep in you, hearing you moaning, and whining for his touch. He loved knowing you smiled and laughed because of him and not because of Hyuck who would only cause your mood to deteriorate.

Yet with how much he loved all that, he hated that you were still Hyuck’s despite how much Mark told himself you were his. His piercing hatred-filled glare through the mirror and towards himself said it all.

With one last push at his chest, Mark separated himself from you. He watched you clean off his dried cum in a rush, complaining about how much of a hassle it was. Pulling out body wipes to remove the lingering smell of sex and sweat off of you; leaving no sign behind for him to see.

Mark watched you through glaring eyes. With every passing second he stood bare before you, his chest compressed. Feeling his emotions trying to suffocate him more and more. Reality did its best to make him see the bigger picture he’s avoiding. In addition he receives your exasperated hand motions and expressions for him to get out of the way and start getting cleaned up.

The door was left ajar on your way out. He could see from the slit your jumpy steps to spray yourself with perfume after changing shirts and the house with a spray that sat on the kitchen counter after buzzing in Hyuck.

When he saw you coming closer to the bathroom again, a sort of relief washed over him but it was taken away when you harshly closed the door. Depriving him of what you’re doing to make the apartment comfortable for him: your husband.

He stood motionless for a second. The surrounding noise filled his understanding of what was behind that door. A timer was ticking in his head, the tapping of your shoes replaced the ticking. Every second became louder and his chest trembled knowing the outcome.

Mark heard his breath, shaky and unstable while his eyes widened. The scent of air freshener crept in through the bottom slit of the door. Filling his nostrils the second he heard the front door shut; that loud boom shutting off the timer.

He sighed heavily, eyes shutting tight while simultaneously lowering his head in frustration. The muffled words of the pair pushed him further into these deep feelings he was harboring.

“God fucking damn it.” He curses, enticed by the sound of your voice calling Hyuck ‘honey’. His head turned towards the door, jaw clenching but that’s all he could really do. At the end of the day he was living under his roof and eating his food.

He reached for a hand towel, wetting it to pay away the staining sweat and dry cum that lay on his thighs. Pent-up frustration still lingered, enough to toss it with too much force into the hamper as he put his clothes back on.

Mark leaned over the counter again, mimicking the position the both of you were in before his best friend’s arrival. He still felt your warmth, it always lingered around. His gaze fixates on itself through the mirror.

That noticeable damage stress causes slapped on his face, muscles visibly tense. All his thoughts were the same lately: You. That's all he thought about. Whether it was positive or negative, you’re the only one crowding his thoughts.

He takes a hold of the doorknob, a soft sound emitting that causes Hyuck to turn towards the closed room. You don’t turn to it, fixated on flipping through the channels of the television. Your hand on your hip, and some small humming slipping along.

He was aware of the hesitance of the one behind the door. Becoming alert, he raised himself from the couch. Enough to not draw attention from you, when he saw that the knob was turning and the door was now ajar; his hands took a hold of your waist pulling you towards him.

While Mark looked at the happenings before him with disdain, you dismissed the older male. Laughing with your husband about him startling you; complaining about the lingering pain from his grasp. He held you tightly, back to his chest, and for once in the past years, he felt comfortable.

For the past month or so things had been going too good to be true with Hyuck. At the beginning in which you and Mark began this rendezvous, you both continued to bicker and argue with hopes of completely ruining each other. As time progressed, you stopped inciting arguments with him. You still wanted his downfall to continue but for now, ignorance was bliss.

You ignored him and kept the peace for the most part, too tired to continue the cycle he still tried to keep up. It was comfortable at this point. But when he began to feel foolish and embarrassed that you didn’t continue or follow along, he took it as a small victory, a glance that things were turning for the better. Quite honestly he felt good, not feeling neglected anymore was nice.

But Hyuck was no stupid man. With something like that, there’s always an underlying factor. Especially when it comes to your mercy. Though his inkling began the night of your anniversary dinner, he began to notice the lingering touches. And at times you still argued you’d always run off to Mark’s room, refusing to get out. Making him drag Mark towards your shared room so he wouldn’t sleep in the same room as you.

Though he never actually caught either of you doing anything. That pang in him worsened as the days progressed. And seeing how much you preferred being around his best friend was killing him. He hated seeing how you laughed and had a conversation with Mark but not him.

He hated seeing you smile at Mark but become cold whenever Hyuck came home. It didn’t help that you always smelled like Mark. Whenever he arrived, the smell was prominent enough that it even intoxicated him when you two slept.

He began coming home earlier in late November. Always pretending to fumble with the keys to give you both time to become decent if he was to catch you. But every time he opened those doors you’d be in the kitchen or lounging on the couch. Alone.

Those times he’d sigh in relief. Eyes searching for Mark just to find him on the balcony smoking with a look of angst that kept getting worse as days passed by. He felt foolish each time, angry at himself for doubting you both of ever betraying him. Only he was sick enough to ruin you, he should know better than to think of you in that light.

But it never got easier. Jealousy is consuming him daily even when he keeps telling himself there’s nothing to worry about. His jealousy is not too different from Mark’s. While Hyuck might enjoy your affection and present love, Mark was hating how quickly you changed the roles. Now it was him you treated like worthless trash and only had around for a quickie. If anything he now felt neglected.

“Did you find your keys?” Mark asks, settling on the free couch across from you. Hyuck turns to him, his smile falters. Both men ported that subtle defiant glare with each other. He shakes his head, turning from him to you, and presents you with a smile, making one of your own form too.

He liked this. This was comforting even if he knew nothing ever lasts between you two.

“Haven’t looked for them yet.” He answers, nuzzling his face in the crook of your neck. He pauses for a second to glance at Mark again. His scent strongly lingered on you even if you thought the perfume could drown it out.

Mark looks at you momentarily, hoping you’d decide to get out of Hyuck’s grasp to at least show some care but that was wishful thinking. “You should’ve rung other tenants, they probably would’ve let you up.” He remarks of his long wait, turning to the TV in hopes it would aid him in ignoring you both.

He hated this, it was unbearable.

“I guess.” You look between both of them, repositioning your legs on Hyuck’s lap and hooking your arms around his neck. He holds you tightly, hands taking a grip of your thighs and waist. Mark tried not to see the way he caressed you. His fingers glided over the fabric of your skirt and looked at you as he teased the idea of them going under.

Getting fed up from your quiet giggles and his best friend, Mark stood up ready to head towards the rooftop but Hyuck stopped him. “Where are you going?” Mark looked between his hand and your face, seeing how you did nothing to avoid his gaze. “Smoke, why?” His foot begins to jitter the longer he remains there.

“Let’s eat first. I have some news. ” Hyuck answers, helping you both off the couch. His hand clutches yours, pulling you towards the dinner table. Mark followed suit, sitting across you while boring daggers into your eyes as Hyuck warms up the food that had gotten cold in the trance of waiting.

“Are they bad ones?” Mark questioned, glare not dropping trying to figure out if it was disinterest or guilt in your mirroring gaze. “You’re home earlier than recently and even brought food.”

Haechan granted him a chuckle, the microwave’s buzzing muffling it. “You can’t let anything slide.” Shaking his head, your husband took the seat beside you. “Not bad at all actually.”

Mark didn’t seem to enjoy the answer, opting to gather the drinks. While it went unnoticed by Hyuck, you couldn’t help but feel the hostility weighing down on your shoulders. To ease that, you decided to pry for an answer as well.

“No but actually, why are you home earlier?” You ask, preparing his plate despite his protest. This was so different that the quick change-up still felt foreign to all of you but mainly Mark. It’s almost mimicking the life you two had while newly weds.

He turns to you with a stoic look, swallowing the piece in his mouth. “Why? You don't want me to? Was I interrupting something?” You muster a nervous laugh, kissing his cheek to deflect. “Not really. We were working on last-minute touch-ups for Mrs. Oh’s commission.” You squeeze his hand and elicit him to smile in return, dropping the hostility.

“I know it’ll turn out great.” Oh, he was so full of shit and you knew it. He can act all he wants but his feelings towards your art will never change. “How’s the painting going, Mark?” His focus shifts to the quiet man. Mark had that same angry look plastered on his face, obvious that he wasn’t enjoying himself.

“Good. Your wife is of great help.” He raised his beer bottle, guzzling the liquid as if his life depended on it, without a care for his liver. Hatred seemed to be the only thing that filled your husband’s body upon the sentence spilling from Mark’s mouth.

His slow chewing and persistent glare towards the older male made this tense dinner worsen. “That she is.” His voice had deepened when the words cascaded. It was ruining your night how obvious they were being. But if they weren’t going to act upon it and grant you entertainment, then you’ll have to shift that tension.

“Hyuck, you never answered my question.” You turn to him, dropping your grip from the fork and leaning back on the chair rest. “Right, well. I’ve been working with them for a while–”

“You’re quitting?!”

“Let me finish, love.”

He grins trying to hide his dissatisfaction with your interruption. His hand takes a hold of yours, squeezing it. “I’ve been overworking myself. Working overtime to the point it’s been a big reason our marriage is the way it is…” You don't meet his gaze, it drops just like your stomach knowing what he could mean.

Not only does it cause sadness but it also irks you that he’d drop that in front of Mark. Sure he knew you guys weren’t doing good but why bring it up now that you’re both ignoring it?

Regardless he continues. “What I’m getting at is that I have some hours accumulated and I’m taking three months off.” Both you and Mark turned to him startled. Three months was a lot for a simple vacation and when you think about it, he’s not that pleasant when he has free time at hand.

“That’s a lot of time, Hyuck. What do you even plan on doing?!” He could hear the concern in your voice, you still weren’t ready to see him day and night. Mark seemed to have your sentiment at heart. He too was thinking of how awkward and uncomfortable things will be with him at home.

Yet all Hyuck could do was laugh wholeheartedly until it turned dry and low, glaring at you both. “You two don’t seem to want me around.” His fork hits the plate with a loud thud, your eyes rolling at his attitude. Just when things were nice, he always had to sneak in his tantrums.

“It’s not that, you just haven’t had time to yourself in so long. What do you even plan on doing?” At that second Mark felt warm. The tone in your voice reminded him of how you would talk to Hyuck months prior. It gave him hope that you two would cut the crap and go back to argument after argument. At least then you'd run to him for comfort.

Donghyuck pouted, nodding in agreement. “Yeah... That’s why we’re going on a trip.” He pats your thigh, a smile creeps on his face. “A family friend has allowed me to use one of their homes. I thought it’d be nice to spend New Years there since we spent Christmas here.” He looked around for a reaction, a little annoyed that neither gave him one.

“Well?” He raised an eyebrow, smile faltering.

“When do you guys leave?” Mark questions, a dumbfounded expression on his face. Hyuck pressed his lips together with a twinge of guilt the longer he looked at his friend. Has the hostility been so bad that he's not including himself? Well… Mark’s best interest wasn’t that at heart.

“Tomorrow and you're going too.” He points his finger for visualization. In the second Hyuck’s gaze drops to search for his napkin, Mark and you both turn to each other. Mark questioned what would be of this relationship while you wondered what your husband was planning or if he truly was clueless. Nonetheless, the biggest concern was how your little game would continue with Hyuck around 24/7 now.

Donghyuck’s plans only seemed to interfere with Mark’s. Even more now that he was thinking about all the things he planned on revealing as a surprise. Mark didn’t have three months. In fact, at the beginning of the year he had to start moving into his new apartment. Having you two help him move in was going to be the reveal but now everything was ruined.

“Are you okay?”

Your genuine concern broke both of them out of their trances. Mark turned to you with his big round eyes, feeling his chest warm again; in awe of your simple actions. Hyuck’s chewing slowed down when he looked between you and Mark; confused and scared at the same time.

“Mark?”

“Um… yeah it’s just–”

Fuck he missed hearing you say his name endearingly.

In that instance he gave you a sly smile, scratching his head in discomfort. “I actually can’t stay the whole three months.” A sort of apology settled in his eyes knowing you're both confused.

“I already found an apartment and I wanted it to be a surprise for you guys when I start moving in… I get the keys on the second.” He chuckles nervously, avoiding your gaze but turning to his best friend.

You knew that day would come. In fact, your fear of him leaving is what led to both of you starting this affair. Yet you didn’t think it would be this soon. What was once hostility between your husband and his best friend now transferred between you and Mark.

Maybe you didn’t care too much that he was leaving anymore but you did care that he hid something that big from you. It’s like he didn’t know you at all. Surprises were never your thing and if he had pulled that on you when the time came, you’d be absolutely furious with him.

“Did they give you hell for the working situation?” Hyuck’s voice interfered with your internal monologue, turning your gaze from Mark to him. “Kind of… I mean I’ve shown them proof of freelancing with the paintings and even if that wasn’t enough, I’ve managed to get Taeyong’s help in being a co-signer for payments. Just until I finally settle with the artist studio.”

“It’ll be sad to see you go. Right, y/n?”

“Right.”

“So does that mean you’ve gotten a job?” Hyuck excitedly questions, forgetting the remainder of his meal. Mark’s body sways at the mention, a smile forming on his lips. “Yeah…” He spoke, trying his best to not seem too excited.

While the two seemed to be celebrating, your mood had soured. He found an apartment and chose his location but didn’t tell you any of it and then complains that you’ve changed. He truly wasn’t any better.

“What location?”

“Huh?”

Hyuck hums in confusion, seeing your expression. “I want to know what location he chose. Yasuki gave him two options. So which one?” There your husband lets out a confused chuckle, shaking his head and leaning back on the chair. “Why haven’t I heard of this?” He laughs a bit more, pushing his plate away from him.

“Because you’re never home.” Your hostility was ruining the night now. What started with them was ending with you. It was not helping Hyuck’s feelings when it came to you and his best friend. When he thought it was a simple delusion, your reaction to knowing Mark was leaving left a bitter taste in his mouth to the point he was blaming the meal.

Mark cleared his throat, sitting up straight. “I’m going to give digital work a try. So that studio— it’s an hour away.” He gulped turning to you in fear of how you’d react. It wasn’t that far from each other but you still weren’t processing that he was going to leave you.

An awkward air surrounded the three of you. While Hyuck went back to eating and you played with your food at this point, Mark cleared his throat trying to rid of that anger that filled him earlier. As much as he despises your recent treatment, it pained him more to see you sad because of him.

“So, what time do we leave tomorrow?”

“Not too early. There’s still some errands I have to run before we leave the apartment alone.”

Hyuck lifts his head, answering Mark before rising from his seat. “Are you done?” Your voice cuts through. You were used to him leaving the table whenever but you didn’t want to be alone with Mark right now. At most you knew he’d cling to you as a means to ask for forgiveness and you didn’t want to deal with it.

He hums, taking his plate and washing the remains himself. It’s been a while since he’s done anything to help around the house. The action alone causes some irritation with you despite knowing you should be glad. “I’m waking up early tomorrow so if you excuse me I’ll go wash up and sleep after the game.”

Making his way to the bedroom and soon after back out to the bathroom; Hyuck closed the door behind him feeling that chilly breeze from the open window. Everything seemed fine but an ominous feeling enveloped him upon looking at himself in the mirror. The light fixture above emits a green hue to compliment the dark tiles.

He couldn’t point his finger at it but being in this space and in the position of him leaning against the counter was causing that ache in his chest again. If he remained any longer he could see himself form scenarios in which he wouldn’t be happy and he rather not disrupt the peace you all reside in. For now at least.

As soon as Hyuck turned on the shower, Mark joined him in opening the faucet to finish washing the dishes. “Just leave them there.” Your monotonous voice filled his ears. Head turned to you with a hum as he scrubbed the last remaining utensils.

“I'm already finished, don’t worry about it.” He tried smiling. “Jesus fucking christ seems like everyone can do things themselves now.” You didn’t give him time to respond, opting to walk towards the living area. Flipping through the channels to get some watch time before Hyuck either forced you to watch the match or subtly shoo you away.

Mark looked at you dumbfounded. He knew you were upset with him, enough to make him regret ever not telling you the news when he heard them. To an extent Mark knew you didn’t like things being hidden from you (though you adored hiding things from them). But he had justified his actions by hoping you’d be ecstatic by the time the reveal came.

In his mind, he pictured you happily helping him move into his new apartment. Happy to see him finally start his life all over again with hopes this time he wouldn’t fail. Sometimes he wished you’d end up moving in with him. Leaving Hyuck and this faux persona you’re both creating nowadays.

But by the looks of how you’re taking in the news, he should’ve planned better. Things between you two became complicated and mostly carnal. So he’s been trying to avoid making you upset but nothing was working. He was becoming a burden to you in his eyes and he was starting to feel frightful.

“I’m going to go smo—“

“You do that.”

Your fingers threaded through your hair like his had earlier, not granting him even a direct look. Cutting him off after deciding to just watch the remaining minutes of the match before the one Hyuck wanted to watch.

Mark’s mouth was left ajar, speechless at how easily you blew him off without remorse. This same thing has become quite recurrent every time he upsets you and as much he tries not to, each time you leave him feeling useless to the point he’s stuck to your hip doing anything you want.

He nods in disappointment, taking his box of cigarettes and keys, making his way to the rooftop. With the door closing behind him, you sigh in annoyance with what life is bringing your way.

By half time, Mark had come back ignoring that bubbling jealousy as you caressed an angry Haechan whose body you enveloped as comfort given his team was losing. Three hours later he had woken from his slumber to the faintest sound of the television still on in the living room.

Curious and with a dry throat, Mark stood from the bed making his way to the living room, opening the door as quietly as he could.

“Today through this exclusive TV offer you can get twelve fascinating issues of Zoobooks for 19.95…”

Distracted by the advertisement, you hadn’t noticed Mark approach you in awe after realizing the shirt you’re wearing is his. Small details like this made him forget all those abrupt outbursts you’d throw his way that only made his heart ache. If only he knew how many of these Donghyuck has endured.

His arms wrapped around your waist pulling you to his chest. Lips landing tenderly on your neck and leaving playful pecks. Your low giggles made his heart swell, hands taking a grasp on his own to loosen his grip and let you turn to face him.

“Hyuck you should be asleep…” You drag out the ‘e’ once face to face with the older male, your smile falters upon the realization. His mirrored yours; smile dropping, eyes filled with despondence, and a knot in his throat.

“Oh… it’s you.” To an extent he could hear the pity in your voice, subtly apologizing for confusing him with your husband.

“What the fuck do you mean by that?” His sadness had become anger, that same knot choking him to a physically painful extent. Despite that, your pity had subsided and boredom was evident.

“What if it was him and I said your name? I don’t want either of us to die before the New Year.”

In his entire anger, he hated that his only thought upon your words was: ‘I wouldn’t mind dying with you.’

With that thought alone Mark was beginning to feel frustrated with how easily his emotions ranged because of you. Nevertheless ending his turmoil of emotions, you pulled him down to the couch with you. Encasing his lips with yours once situated to give him some peace of mind.

A kiss was always enough to calm him down. Pulling you closer to his body and resting his hands on your hips as you both continued this lustful kiss. Sighing into the kiss once he felt like he needed a breath of air; one of his hands traveled to hold your face carefully. His warmth radiated to your cold cheek.

“What are you doing up this late?” He whispers, repositioning himself to the armrest on the right and pulling you to his body. Mimicking the position you and Hyuck were in earlier.

“Last minute cleaning before we leave tomorrow.” You took the remote control from the coffee table, disrupting the once semi-comfortable position. “I’m starting to regret it knowing he hasn’t packed anything yet. Have you?”

“Not precisely. I had packed everything for when I started moving into the apartment—“ and he knew he fucked up right then and there.

Your body became tense against his, hard enough that he feared you had become a statue. Shutting his eyes in regret; Mark started beating himself over not being careful with his words. He had gotten so used to speaking freely with you that he was beginning to fear he’d have to censor his vocabulary now.

In a frenzy of panic, the words escape his mouth with fear: “Move in with me.”

There was no denying his words had startled you. Removing his grip from your body to face him, the questions brewing in your brain engrave themselves into your face.

While Mark worked with that nervous laugh that escaped him involuntarily, his hands reached for your face to plant short kisses onto your lips in hopes they’d ease both of your emotions.

“Are you serious?”

“Yeah!”

A peppy feeling in his chest. “I mean it’s smaller than this place but I think you’ll like it.” Your eyes scanned his face, a layer of blush flushing it the longer you stared. The effects of being stared at by someone you love.

“The terrace is spacious so you can have all the plants you want. The bedroom can be your studio and we can have the bed in the living area.” He was so happy and blinded by the scenarios of having you in his home as his wife that he couldn’t see the gears turning in your head.

How willing were you to follow through?

An amused laugh escapes your lips. Mark felt the airy comfort of acceptance to which he mirrors your laugh, kissing you now that he’s satisfied.

“Sounds like a plan, huh? You can do whatever you want while I work for us. I mean I like you and you like me. We can start from square one, I really like you, y/n. Go with me, what else do we need?”

You knew what was needed but for now, you’ll bask in his boyish delight and kiss him like many times before; igniting his hope.

Mark took your kisses as confirmation. Hopefully a few days from now you both will find yourselves running off and leaving this stagnant life. It could be true, this may be your yearned fresh start.

He held your body closer, pillowy lips encasing yours to swiftly place them against your jawline. He created a path amongst your cold skin. A fluttering feeling brewing in your stomach the closer his lips got to your neck.

His tongue lapped at the flesh, drawing circles until he kissed it to create a tingle to run up your spine. Mark was always delicate when kissing your skin. Yes, he wanted to show Donghyuck and everyone what he did to you but for respect towards you, he restrained himself.

“I’ll make sure you’ll get clients no matter what. You can even work remotely from the apartment or not at all if you don't want to. I'll do fine enough.”

His warm whisper traveled up your skin to your ears, booming within your head but not much in a pleasant way.

“Is that what you want?”

“Yes…”

The word left in a groan, hands moving your hips to make you grind against his growing bulge. Quite interesting how easily he can get turned on. He was too enthralled with the way your body felt against him and his hopes to start a new life that he didn’t notice a wave of fright wash over you when hearing the slight creaking from your bedroom.

Not wanting to worry the man beneath you, you smiled, taking his face into your hands. He returned the smile wider, leaning in for one final kiss of the night. Your unexpected moves of getting off him creating a whine to slip from his lips.

“Good night, Mark. Remember to pack up before he finishes his errands.”

You didn’t give him time to return the words or feel frustrated with the mention of his best friend but it didn’t matter. All he cared for was the new life both of you were set to start together.

Fear had always plagued you upon entering this room even before Mark arrived. Whether it was because you knew an argument would brew or because you’d have to sleep in it alone. Things are different now. Now the fear stemmed from entering the room after your rendezvous to see Hyuck staring at the door until you entered, ready to lash out for these years of misery.

But in this reality he wasn’t staring at the door. He sat on the bed, back towards you while looking outside the vast window. Curtain pushed to the side that made copious amounts of neon lighting enter your shared bedroom. His figure had made your heart stop, begging for clemency at the fright he gave you.

You feared he heard you and Mark speak let alone any of the noises any of you could’ve let out from making out. While your heart banged against your ribcage to be let out, Hyuck restrained his bitter chuckle. That familiar smell swaying its way to his nostrils. At least you were in the room with him now.

“Can’t sleep?” Your words didn’t elicit a response from him, if anything he could barely produce a sigh. With no response you approached him. Climbing on the bed, feeling the mattress sink under your knees, complaining about your abuse until you reached him. Wrapping your arms around his waist like Mark had done to you earlier, lips laying on the crook of his neck to take a whiff of his musk.

“What were you doing?” He asks, avoiding your own question. He didn’t need an answer, he knew perfectly what you were doing. Now that he had you this close, that pungent smell of Mark on you suffocated him. It didn’t help that the walls were thin and he could hear both of you murmuring. He may not have heard actual words but it was enough to know you two were together.

His head turned to look at you upon not gaining an answer. It’s not that you took a while but he wanted to familiarize himself with your face whenever you were lying, just like you knew when he lied.

“Cleaning before we leave. I don’t want to come back to a dirty house.” You answer, kissing his cheek with a smile right after.

Fuck. There’s no incriminating factor. Perhaps you're used to it by now.

Hyuck hums, sighing once again to rid his nostrils of Mark’s lingering scent. It was painfully intoxicating his loins. If he didn’t do anything about it, he feared not waking up tomorrow morning. Death by heartache.

Shifting in his spot, Hyuck takes a hold of your body, laying you slowly underneath him. The image before you made your heart swell, giddy excitement filling your entire being. He didn’t do anything besides hover over you but that remorseful look in his eyes made you feel inherently nice.

You didn’t want to feel this way. As much as you act civilized and occasionally loving towards him and in front of Mark to put up a facade, you are still angry and hurt for what he did to you nearly two years ago. You still hated him with your entire being but sometimes the nostalgia of happy moments took over you and made you miss him like crazy.

You knew you hated him. But despite how much you hated him you will always have that parasite in your system that’ll force you to remember the times he’s made you happy. And now that you found yourself with him hovering over you and looking at you lovingly, you seemed to cave.

When you thought he was leaning in for a kiss, his lips landed on your forehead. A tender and soft kiss is what he laid on your skin, taking in the scent of your hair rather than Mark’s. At least this would help ease his aching heart.

Hyuck wondered if this feeling is what you felt when you found out about him and that girl. He never saw you cry about the situation but instead saw you tear down the house with any argument that ensued due to the subject. Perhaps he should be the one to act that recklessly. After all this was between his wife and his childhood best friend but he knew he wasn’t brave enough for that.

In contrast to his inner turmoil, you found the action sweet. Trying your hardest to avoid that feeling of giddiness he was causing you. You two stayed like that for a few minutes, enough for his own scent to rub off on you from how close he held you. Satisfied, Hyuck pulls away, a gush of cool air getting between your bodies to remind you of that lost warmth.

“Don’t overwork yourself, you’ve done a good job keeping the house clean.” His voice still held that sleepy hoarseness, making his praise fill you even more with satisfaction. While he laid on his side again and whispered a sweet good night, you took the opportunity to turn to him and steal a kiss.

For the first time in a while, you initiated the kiss. Catching him off guard, Hyuck opens his eyes surprised before easing into it. Reminded how sweet kisses from you were and how much he had missed them all this time.

Pulling away with a smile on your lips, Hyuck returns it amused. “Good night.” You whisper, laying your head on his chest while his arm wraps around your shoulder pulling you closer to him. You two may feel hurt for the actions you’ve both taken but for tonight you’ll play along with those emotions that crave the comfort of puppy love.

The next day came quicker than expected. All of you had different illusions created regarding your relationships and Mark seemed the most excited about the ones he’s created. Not that you wanted to ruin that hope but you needed time to think about it. On one hand it’d be a perfect way to finally ruin Donghyuck and make him pay for what he’s done to you but on the other it was such an abrupt proposition that you’re still trying to process it.

And for the past three hours, you’ve sat calmly in the passenger seat of your car now that Haechan finally finished his errands, road trip in process. Both of you hand in hand with the radio working as the only source of sound. Even with that, Mark’s bitterness couldn’t be taken away. The image of you being so loving towards the man you fought with daily was consuming him in the worst way possible.

Can one forget everything said that easily?

He tried distracting himself with anything he brought but even that couldn’t do anything for him. His glare shifted from you to Hyuck anytime someone talked. For the past hour both you and your husband had been passively debating on what to eat before arriving at the vacation home. Mark had given up his rights to make decisions, not caring much about what he ate. If it was for him, a good cold drink and a cigarette would be considered a meal.

“I don’t want to eat pasta again this week.” you whined, fingers squeezing his. A low grunt left your husband’s throat, rolling his eyes at how hard it’s always been to get you to choose what to eat. “Then let’s stop at a rest area and buy something from those restaurants?” His voice got louder, not enough to be considered aggravated but enough to make Mark shake his head with a grin.

“And eat in the car?! We still have two hours left, I don’t want the smell to stay!” Mark covered his face with his hands, laughing silently seeing you let go of Haechan’s hand. You pout in dissatisfaction while Hyuck ran his fingers through his hair, a huff of annoyance escaping him.

It wasn’t long until the sun went down and due to his busy morning, he didn’t get to eat breakfast or lunch. Poor guy was on the brink of fainting from starvation. “We should’ve ate while you were putting gas.” The words escaping you had traveled to Hyuck’s ear, leaving behind a bitter tone.

Raising the hand that was in his hair, he turned to you irked. His face was red, mouth agape in disbelief since you were the one who didn’t want to eat in that area. “I told you and you didn’t want to!—”

He was abruptly cut off when a popping sound was heard, dissipating any anger and laughter from anyone inside. Right now, you all felt confused and scared realizing it was the sound of a tire the second the rubber began flopping on the concrete and the drive was no longer smooth.

“Just what I need, Jesus fucking Christ.” Your husband mutters, opening his door angrily to get out and inspect the damage. You looked at him with the same expression he gave you before beginning his berating but now you followed behind to see what happened. With everyone gone, Mark is left alone in the car, realizing this could get much worse.

“Pop the trunk, let me get the spare out.” Donghyuck states, patting the metal and looking at you a bit tired. But your ashamed grimace was putting him out of ease.

“What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

“I don’t have a spare…”

He rubbed his face, sighing in frustration. “Are you being serious, y/n? Why don’t you have a spare?!”

"I— we took it out to transfer the first batch of canvases to Mrs. Oh's house, we just didn't bother to put it back in..."

He wanted to yell at you. To start an argument in which both of you would tell the other to die without saying the actual words. He wanted to walk away and leave both you and that traitor alone with the car just as long as he was far away; but he couldn’t.

Things have gone well and last night had given him hope too. Haechan knew he couldn’t ruin things this fast over a tire or being hangry. The only rational thing to do is sit down and act like he was fine, like it was all fine and under control.

Taking a seat next to Mark, the both share a brief look before sitting in silence, defeat washing over your husband. Mark didn’t give any input and you yourself didn’t know what to do. Only thing that came to mind was comforting Hyuck.

That in mind, you push his legs together, taking a seat on his lap and making him face you after wrapping your arms around his neck. He looked beautiful in your opinion. His plump lips formed a pout, lids heavy from exhaustion. Even when dull you adored his eyes.

“Does your phone have signal? Can we try calling a mechanic?” He shakes his head, grunt sounding more like a whine while protruding his pout more. “Yours?” You mimic his response, pulling him closer by the neck.

Mark saw everything from his peripheral, knuckles turning white the tighter he held his book. His heart was screaming, aching, and threatening to explode if you kept being this blatantly affectionate in front of him. Did you have no shame? No remorse? What were you playing at to love him just last night but rub in his face that another man could have you publicly?

The nail in the coffin came when you leaned into Haechan, slotting his lips with yours and kissing him tenderly. Turning his head to an angle towards you both, his eyes squinted and lips parted with aversion. The image seemed too familiar. Was it from last night or the afternoon in this same car that started this affair but he too felt betrayed now.

Having enough of watching you kiss away your husband’s stress, the older male made his way out of the car, slamming the door causing both you and Hyuck to separate. His gaze turned to his friend, panting to regain air but before he could question anything you kissed his swollen lips once more, holding him for dear life.

“Better?”

“Much better.”

Hyuck smiles at you, kissing your cheek before helping you off his lap. He wouldn’t have minded staying like that for a while but his subconscious told him to go to Mark. To talk to him while he remained agitated and with swollen lips: evidence of your adoration. It may be malicious but why shouldn’t he when everything pointed to his betrayal.

“You good?” Your husband raises his eyebrows, thumb swiping against his red swollen lips. An action Mark watches bitterly. “Just taking a smoke.” Placing the stick between his lips, the older pushes the box towards his friend as an offering. Hyuck takes it, leaning against the car waiting for Mark to pass him the lighter but the latter turns it on with his own. In the instance that their heads came together and tips of the burning cigarettes touch, a flash goes off making both of them turn startled.

Haechan blows off the smoke, ruffling his hair when realizing it was you that took a picture of both. No one said anything. You simply smiled at them, rolling the film for whatever was your next target.

For the following half an hour you all remained silent with the exception of your camera whenever they did something you liked and occasionally the radio if anyone saw it fit to turn it on.

The sun was threatening to fall and worry finally settled; the three of you throwing worried glances to each other. When the universe had enough of you all acting useless; the presence of an older woman cleaning her hands on her worn out apron stood before you three.

“What seems to be the problem?” Though sounding hostile, she meant well. Clearing his throat, Hyuck stood from his position on the seat he had settled on not long ago. “Hello… Our tire popped and we don’t have a spare. By any chance do you have service to call a mechanic?” His hands rub against his jeans, smiling at her in hopes that would help.

She simply chuckles, shaking her head in disbelief. “Who doesn’t carry a spare tire driving through here? Have you seen the potholes?” Her chuckle turned into laughter, mocking the three but nevertheless she didn’t mean any harm and instead asked them to follow her.

“There’s no mechanic for another two hours and the one we have has been out for the past week but my son and husband should be here from work in around ten minutes. My son has spare tires and you can work it out with him. How does that sound?”

There was no other choice. All of you had to be gone soon if you wanted to enjoy the remaining days of 1999 and Mark’s stay with the two of you. Nodding, Hyuck agrees, eliciting a smile on the woman’s face that invites the party to her home.

The car was left on the side of the road but the vast windows of the home allowed all of you to view it for precaution. The walk from the vehicle to the house was a bit far with the troubles of wet dirt from past rain and some stray thorns but both men tried their best to make your path clear.

It was much colder upon entering the home. The walls were freezing and the lights dull. The house was lovely but that ominous feeling was creeping on Mark enough to hold your arm and pull you closer to him. You mustered to side eye him, confused on his actions but pulled away when Hyuck turned to you both. A subtle dissatisfied look on his face.

“Spending New Years at the beach?” The lady questioned in order to create conversation. “Yeah, sounds like a good idea so far.” Haechan smiles, looking around when taking a seat on the plastic covered couch. The older lady that soon introduced herself as Magui had gone to the kitchen to continue cooking dinner.

She had confessed that her husband and son left her alone the entire day. Most of the time only seeing them when they came back and when making them lunch. Seeing yourself in her, you searched for a sliver of sadness but who figured some people don’t mind the life you have. She spoke highly of the men in her life so maybe that was the key to her happiness.

“Are you staying with family for the New Year, Magui?” You egg the conversation, sipping on the hot chocolate she handed all of you now that it was getting colder. “We’re spending it with my family. They live in the next state over. Today is their last day of work for the year so we leave early tomorrow.” Her smile became warmer the longer she spoke to you all, feeling more at ease herself.

“Are you all spending it with your family?” Truth be told she wanted to know what was the deal between the three of you. She was an older woman, the more wiser and she could see the glances both men threw you. Were you with the beautifully tanned honey haired man or the brunette with gracious cheekbones? Both of them made their infatuation clear but only one of them would be presented as your partner.

Mark shrugged, giving her a shy smile. “Just us three.” Haechan answers, taking your hand into his. There her answer went. Parting her lips to let out an ‘ah’, she nods at the reveal.

“Seems a little lonely doesn’t it?” It did but none of you would want to admit it. After all the past years you’ve spent it with Hyuck’s family so this was a change of pace. “Not necessarily. I only have them.” Mark answers, his eyes shifting from her to both of you.

He had his family but his brother and mother were cowards that did anything his father said. He, like you, spent Christmas and New Years with Hyuck and his family, that’s the most he’d see his best friend in a busy year.

“Yeah… well his family too but he wanted to change it up this year.” You laugh nervously, squeezing your husband’s hand who only raised his eyebrows as a response. You, like Mark, didn't have a good relationship with your own family.

Not too long after your mother’s death, your father remarried a woman you could only describe as a geriatric cunt. Preferring her over you: his own daughter, things hadn’t been the same as they were when you were younger. Years of neglect had gotten to you and you treated him as nothing more than your creator.

Well, that’s your version but in reality all these years you treated your father horribly for trying to move on. Yes, he loved your mother but he knew he couldn’t take care of you and your brother alone and his current wife was a delight. Even after all these years of your reproach, they still loved you dearly and tried their best to keep in touch.

As the years progressed you ignored your father’s advances on fixing this damaged relationship but he kept trying. You couldn’t understand why your brother had forgiven him but you couldn't. Maybe because you refuse to acknowledge you were in the wrong in wanting your father to cope the same way as you did. So if you were miserable he should be too.

This year he had invited you all to his home once again for the holidays. He knew you spent it with your Husband’s family but it never hurt to try. Whenever you didn’t answer his emails, letters, or fax he’d resort to Hyuck who’d only reply with: ‘I’ll let her know.’ Knowing full well the answer will always be no.

Donghyuck never blamed you for trying to stay away from your father. He saw how Mark’s own relationship with his was and he didn’t want to push you either. All he could do was stay by your side and offer you comfort despite not agreeing with you. At least he knew his family would always produce warmth and love for his loved ones.

Soon enough screaming from outside took everyone’s focus. Magui knew it was her husband and son; greeting them ever so lovingly and kissing their cheeks as a welcome; her face lit up in joy.

Maybe in another universe this could be you and Hyuck. Maybe.

“So?” The older male spoke with a gruff voice, hand turning to the three of you sitting on the couch as he took his spot on the recliner chair his wife sat on earlier. Presumably none of you were sitting there by the time he arrived. “Their tire popped right outside.” Words came out choppy while chewing on a piece of potato, making sure it was well cooked.

“Chivi go change it out, get one of your spares.” Magui ordered her son who stood with no hesitation. Cocking her head towards her son while looking at your husband; he stood up to follow him, pulling you with him in the process. Not trusting to leave you alone with Mark even when there were eyes all over.

You began freezing the instant you crossed the threshold, your jacket doing nothing to warm you. You didn’t complain much. In a way you did prefer being with him for the time being, still feeling awkward around the older couple back inside.

“Ah. Yeah… Horrible burst.” The one called ‘Chivi’ speaks, raising his eyebrows while releasing a small laugh. With a flashlight he pointed at how horribly ripped the rubber was, flaps barley hanging close together. “My spares are used up and old themselves so I recommend you change it as soon as shops open again and get a new one. It’ll last you a good few weeks but it’s best to be cautious. Are you okay with that?”

Anything was okay than staying stranded in a small town nearing the middle of nowhere. All he wanted to do was get to the home, shower, and rest for the remainder of the night. He was exhausted and hungry, he wanted a break.

“Yeah, yeah that’s fine. How much would it be?” Haechan nods exasperatedly, hand reaching for his wallet but Chivi stops him. “Nothing! Actually, can you go get me a pack of tortillas and a large bottle of coke? I forgot to get them and ma’s gonna kill me if she finds out.” He laughs, finding this comedic.

You let out a giggle yourself. After waiting a good 10-20 minutes and night had finally caught up to you, all this family asked for was the essentials to their dinner. It may be the simplest of requests but you found the family endearing perhaps because you were still fixated on the fact that in another life you too could’ve had this sweet family with Donghyuck.

“Sure, no problem.” He heard your voice for the first time this night, smiling at the confirmation. He handed Hyuck the keys to his truck, rushing you both while giving directions to the nearest grocery store that seemed to be 15 minutes away if you went straight ahead.

When arriving the both of you got the items rapidly with barely any exchange of words, exhaustion weighing down both of you. Besides their requests both you and Hyuck opted to get them a cake. It was minimal and perhaps the most random thing to give but you wanted to show your gratitude to the family in case they didn’t take payment for their help.

On the way back, he cracked the window open letting the cold air in, making you turn to him a little peeved. “Cold?” He taunts, tongue pushing against his cheek before chuckling. “Very. Feel.” Taking his hand onto yours, Hyuck pretended to shudder at the contact of your cold skin but didn't let go.

“We finally have some time to ourselves.” He deviates, holding your hand against your thighs which you covered with a blanket you were able to get out of the car before leaving. “Yeah, I suppose so.” At least the first night out without any argument and ill words thrown at each other besides your make up anniversary dinner.

From time to time he’d turn to you, seeing as you watched the trees blur away but focused on how beautiful you looked. The way your lips shined from the lip balm, your nose with the faintest hint of blush from the cold, and the way your eyelashes batted against your cheeks whenever you blinked.

If it wasn’t because of the darkness, he’d think you’re glowing. You didn’t look as miserable and dull as you did months ago and before Mark’s arrival. That only made him feel guilty and incensed; being aware that his best friend has been able to liven up your life. Just Mark and not him: your husband.

Haechan’s hand begins to smoothen out the creases of your sweatpants, his hand progressively getting higher on your thigh enough to make you feel a tingling ache between your legs. His hand became warm enough that it almost felt like you didn’t have cloth between you two and he was directly caressing your skin.

“What are you doing, Hyuckie?” your head rolled to face him, sultry eyes begging him to not stop even if your voice tried to act like it. “I never got to fully taste you that night, princess.” A smile crept on your face as his hand inside your sweatpants, pushing away the fabric of your underwear.

There was always sweetness and comfort in the way he called you said nickname. You always surrendered under him whenever he said the word. If only he knew the effect it had on you, he’d exploit it to have you eating from his palm.

“We can’t—” You choked up, his fingers pushing through your cavern, enveloping them with your warmth. He held a smirk on his face, biting his inferior lip to repress a mischievous chuckle. “Not here…” You moan, he curled the digits once reaching as deep as he could, slowly moving them within you.

“We can’t fuck in someone else’s car.” An airy breath left your lips, panting the while he continued to move his fingers, tips gracing your g-spot. He knew your body well, no one but him.

“Why not?” He whines, fingers leaving your body and making you cry from emptiness. His hand reaches his plump lips, smothering them with your essence as if it was lip balm, licking it off after seconds and rejoicing from joy at the taste he longed for.

Your eyelids fluttered at the image, feeling tears well up on your waterline. “Lay your blanket in the back, we can there.” He sucks on his ring finger, biting at the skin, teeth dancing across the flesh to leave behind a red trail before drying them off on his neck.

In your seconds of contemplation his phone rang angrily inside his pocket; removing his attention from you. You wouldn’t deny that it bothered you, it had ruined the mood and both of you couldn’t ignore it as your pager kept buzzing when the calls went unanswered.

It felt like Deja Vu for the one on the other end.

“Mark–” “Mark.”

Hyuck shakes his head with a chuckle, not surprised that even when gone he’d interrupt another intimate moment. “We’re taking too long apparently.” Turning to look at his disappointed face while he sped off to the house; you couldn’t help but feel his frustration. He didn’t talk after that, leaving the reminder silent.

On arrival you took it upon yourself to break that silence, cupping his cheek into your cold hands making him look at you. “When we get home, okay?” You kiss him, easing his irritation. He nodded in agreement, his own hand on top of yours and pulling you closer to him to deepen it.

He swiped his tongue over your lower lip, you parted them to give him access and when his free hand traveled under your shirt; your pager buzzed again causing him to laugh into the kiss. This time bitterness won.

“Let’s just go.” He sighs, unbuckling and rushing out the truck. You shared his sentiment, picking at your lips on the way inside the house; his hand holding yours tightly.

The four inside turned to the creak of the door, desperate hunger slapped on their faces. “There was a long line, sorry.” Your husband excused, handing them the still warm tortillas and soda bottle.

“Sit. Eat Before you all leave.” Magui offers; a warm smile on her face while serving her son first. The three of you didn’t want to burden the family any longer but they insisted until you all agreed.

While conversation was made and you all enjoyed the meal after extensive hours of unwilling starvation, you all finally bid your goodbyes and thanked them again for their hospitality. In a matter of seconds that brief encounter was gone but the experience will always stay.

The remaining two hours were spent in complete silence considering you knocked out as soon as you got in the car and Mark held resentment for you not answering and crossing that threshold with swollen lips letting him know what you two were truly doing. Donghyuck himself was tired and didn’t have it in him to throw jabs at the older male in the passenger’s seat (both of them convincing you to just sleep in the back until you arrived).

Around midnight you all had arrived. The scenery was familiar to Mark, enough that he sat up straight to analyze every architectural detail of the house. From the geometrical protruding walls, huge clear windows, and the creaking play set that had given him many burns going down the slide as a child.

This was Mark’s— his father’s beach house. The same house his father banned him from years ago after one of their petty arguments. One neither could recall anymore but till this day they still remained angry.

He wanted to be glad that he was staying here as a way to stick it to his dad but knowing the man gave Hyuck access when he never gave it to anyone, not even his favorite child, made his blood boil. What had he done for his friend to gain his father’s trust till this day?

“Can you get some of the bags while I take her in?” Donghyuck interrupts his thoughts.

It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair that he gets to have you and his father’s admiration. Hyuck didn’t have a bad relationship with his own father. Why was he so adamant on taking his dad too? He was already brainwashing you by the way you’ve been acting so what else could he take from him?

Mark bitterly took in the items, throwing them all against the well kept couch. While your husband tucked you in (occasionally hearing your sleepy complaints about wanting to sleep), Hyuck returned quickly to help Mark unload. Stepping foot in the living room, he watched his friend’s actions.

The older looked vexed, gripping tightly to old framed family pictures. He appeared in some, miserable as one could be and the ones he ever smiled in he was a toddler with no recollection of ever loving his father.

“Neat, huh?” Haechan interrupted, extending his arms to signal at the house. Mark hummed, not lifting his gaze taking his own bag. “Why didn’t you tell me it was this house? That the family friend was my dad?” He questions minimizing the distance between the two.

The younger shrugs giving no importance, “Thought we’d spend the last few days where we always had fun.” He smiles almost sincerely. It’s true that Hyuck wanted to spend the end of the year at a place full of fond memories but after what Mark has done, tormenting him a little won’t hurt.

Mark sighs, pressing his lips tightly together while nodding; leaving his friend alone in the living room as he makes his way to his old bedroom. The only unkempt and dirty one in the entire house.

Early morning Donghyuck had woken up with a cold spot beside him that belonged to you. His mind raced with ill thoughts and fury was consuming him. He called out for you but gained no response. That began to elicit scenarios in which if he stood and went to Mark’s room you’d be there.

Shaking his head to not get ahead of himself, he calls out your name again, putting on his sandals to roam around the house and search for you. He searched upstairs, in the kitchen, the living room, extra bedrooms, and even considered barging into Mark’s. But he didn’t want to see it with his own eyes. He didn’t want to see you two in anything compromising and ruin his sanity.

Instead he went downstairs to continue his search, aiding his thumping heart from the ache of the ‘what if’. If there’s something Hyuck keeps in mind from all the things you’ve said it’s: ‘Who seeks, finds.’ And he didn’t want to find, at least not yet. He was glad that when stepping foot in the warm lower layer, he found you floating about in the grand indoors pool.

His heart relaxed as his face muscles did, sighing in relief to know his suspicions were wrong. How glad he was to be wrong for once. Making his way to the edge of the pool, he rolls up his sleeping pants, removing the sandals and dipping his feet in the warm water.

It took you a few seconds to realize he had arrived but seeing his face unconsciously made a smile appear on your face. “Morning,” You coo, swimming his way. He returns the smile basking in the sweetness of the moment.

If this had happened months ago you’d glare at him before deciding to get out of his presence. You would’ve never spoken to him in this way months ago but now you were acting like everything was behind you. Whether it’s your own guilt or being tired of the cycle, he was going to appreciate the small things.

“Morning, princess.” He lets out with a groggy voice, caressing your cheek the instant you get close. “Slept well? I didn’t want to wake you, you looked really tired yesterday.” He musters a nod, yawning away his remaining sleep.

“Is it cold out? Why aren’t you at the beach instead?” You shrug, swiping away droplets from your face. “I’ll get ready and we can go if you want. There’s this secluded area Mark and I would always go. I think you’ll like it, this time it’ll be just us.” He winks, standing to shake off the water that clung to his legs. You nodded, watching him make his way out to leave you in solitude again.

You two hadn’t been this close in the longest time and it was concerning how sweet he was. Even when you two ‘made’ peace and started to act like nothing was ever wrong he didn’t go out of his way to be this loving. The most came to occasional kisses on the cheek and holding hands but he had taken a drastic turn that night he announced his long break.

That night had shifted things for everyone and you couldn’t get past your uneasiness. You knew it was because of Mark, it was obvious in the way he spoke to his friend that Hyuck saw something and he didn’t like it. You weren’t stupid, you can see the way they look at each other compared to earlier in his stay.

For the most part they always tried to defy or avoid each other and the times they acted like best friends, the moment would be ruined when either made a sly remark regarding you. You wanted to believe Hyuck did it for the kindness of his heart and not to brag but that doubt won’t leave your mind anytime soon, not until Mark’s final day and you decide if you’ll join him.

But in the meantime you’ll enjoy the affection Hyuck’s giving you. Despite spending the most intimate time with Mark he had dialed down on his sweetness and allowed his libido to take over. Sure occasionally he’d act like the sweet boy from earlier but he was a man nonetheless and your cute walks around the countryside turned to him taking you in the back of the car because he couldn’t hold off much longer until getting home.

You liked Mark. You held him dear to you, he was still that sweet boy you met half a year into your relationship with Donghyuck but he barely acted like him anymore. He was animalistic and possessive, wanting to keep you near him at all times and you didn’t know how to process that. You understood his love for you to an extent but the man you first slept with that afternoon wasn’t the same one that held you roughly against a sink just two days ago.

Not to mention that aside from his libido he became a clingy cheese ball that if you spent too much time with him, you’d scream how much of a bore he became inside your head.

Minutes later, Hyuck had come out with the remaining items you needed, taking your hand in his and dragging you out the dock that led directly to the beach. With the exception that he took a detour between large boulders until you both ended up by the beach completely isolated from anyone else.

The view was beautiful; for miles on end all you could see was the swaying dull cyan waves, clashing against the sand and whatever boulders were closest. Walking a little further up to the sand, you set the blanket as Hyuck the remaining items. Both settled beside each other waiting for the chilliness to calm down before dipping in the sea.

As the minutes of silence passed it was to be noted how estranged you two became to one another. What in past years would have been multiple conversations in by now had become subtle glances and shy giggles when caught. Almost like the beginning of your courtship. To anyone seeing you two; they ought to think it was a cute occurrence, but to you both— it was eating you alive seeing how dull things became.

“Are you cold?”

He breaks the ice, opening a container of strawberries, taking a bite of the red fruit. “A little.” You confess, looking from him to the tides that purposely spray you. He took the opportunity and came closer, wrapping his arm around you and pulling you to him; enveloping you in an embrace that in fact was warming you.

He hums, resting his head on your shoulder basking in your scent. Glad that for once in a long time he couldn’t smell his friend on you. “Are we staying here the three months?” You question, hoping that initiated a type of conversation.

“You don’t like it here?” “I do. I just want to know what plans you have.”

He lets out a sigh through his nose, fingers dancing across your arms.

“You know I don’t like saying my plans out loud. Your grandma scared me off.” He chuckles, allowing his lips to grace your skin as if it was an accident, creating goosebumps; Donghyuck can’t help but grin.

The most you could do was bring his hand up to your lips, placing a tender kiss on his soft skin. Feeling your lips on his flesh made his heart flutter, becoming warm until he saw a familiar accessory wrapped around your wrist. That beauty he felt had dwindled in a matter of seconds.

Donghyuck recalled seeing a similar one on Mark’s wrist just last month. That same shade of blue that faded with the pass of water and beads began wearing out. For someone that’s spent weeks analyzing you two, he was beginning to beat himself up over this small object.

“You’ve been getting closer to Mark, haven't you?” He takes your hand, bracelet in view. You tensed until he showed the key element. A hum ended up leaving your lips, nodding whilst nervously teasing him.

“I stole your best friend.”

“But he’s my best friend.”

His voice may be playful but his heart ached.

“Maybe come home early and you can have him back.” You smile mockingly, turning so he could see it. His hand drops from your wrist, landing on your thigh. “I don’t think that’s a problem anymore.”

You knew what he insinuated but you weren’t going to let that ruin this small peace you are feeling now. “You know we miss you, right?” Lies. You and him knew it was a lie but if it wasn’t for the tone that delivered such words, it would’ve consumed him.

Instead he found himself biting his lower lip, your sultry eyes scanning his face and feeling his hand inch further up the exposed skin of your thigh. “How much?” He asks, face getting closer to yours, enough to smell the pool’s bleach in your hair and the coconut lip balm.

“Hyuckie, we can’t here…” His fingers went beneath the fabric of your bikini bottoms, intruding your walls carefully just like last night. This time there was no reason for them to be interrupted. “You said we could when we got home,” He kisses the shell of your earlobe, words falling hot against your flesh.

His lips began a trail from there onto the crook of your neck, nipping lightly and leaving a warm sting. “I haven’t been able to feel you fully for so long, I’m surprised you’re not dry.” You felt yourself gulp at his words, beginning to pant from the adrenaline of both this rendezvous and the possible meaning of his words.

He fully separated himself from you, laying you on the blanket before hovering over your body like a few nights ago. The exception being that this time he delved into a deep and animalistic kiss. His lips felt desperate against yours, both your tongues immediately waltzing with each other. Holding onto his neck and torso to keep some control.

“Won’t someone see?” “It’s private property, princess.”

Donghyuck was drunk with pent up arousal from months of no contact and the irritation of what you and his best friend have done behind his back. You were his and Mark was his best friend. Two separate things and he was not going to allow either of you to merge into one and leave him behind.

Your nails softly clawed his skin, leaving red trails to indicate how much he was pushing. You didn’t dislike this, in fact his lascivious side has always been what you enjoy. He groans against your mouth from the sting of your actions, biting your lower lip to elicit a cry of your own.

Both your pained moans turned to pleasure giggles; he licked your lower lip before both your tongues connected and his hands untied your bikini top. Sliding from your skin and letting him feel your perked nipples against his own.

You felt sensitive under him, it wasn’t helping that his hand traveled between the both of you to undo the knots of your bottoms as well. Pushing off the fabric to let him rub circles on your clit without any restraints. Your eyelids fluttered at the contact, pulling him even closer to what he already was.

“Not so shy now, huh?” He laughs against your mouth, nipping your bottom lip before leaving a trail of kisses from them to your neck. The instant he penetrated you with his fingers, he bit your neck causing a pleasured yelp to leave your lips. “Oh, you dick.” You moan, moving your head to give him more access.

Haechan laughed at your words, continuing his abuse on your flesh and making sure those juvenile markings were dark and visible. He could do this to you and proudly. Only him.

Delving in the pleasure of his long fingers moving at a gratifying pace, you urge him to add another one in which he complied, scissoring and stretching them within you to continue hearing your moans. You loved his fingers. He was the right amount of rough that made your legs shake with even the least amount of effort.

Curling his digits; the deeper they were within you, the louder your moans became. It didn’t help that his aggressive praises made your head spin. The likes of:

“Your cunt was made for me.”

“No one will ever know how to fuck you this good with just their fingers.”

and “If you’re shaking like this with my fingers, I can’t wait until you’re full of my cock and cum.”

All of which made your eyes roll to the back of your head with the imagery of what that was like.

But you weren’t one to let him just talk without action. “Then fill me right now. Bruise me with no end.” Your eyes met his, a thin amount of tears threatening to slip. The same sultry eyes and voice defied and taunted him waiting for consequences.

He didn’t grant you the satisfaction of a primary orgasm, instead he pulled his fingers out to leave you aching and whining from emptiness. His body separated from yours and that breeze he protected you from earlier attacks while he removed his swimming trunks.

Sitting up to look at him, your chest felt warm seeing his hardened dick spring in fervor almost as if it had a mind of its own when in your presence. You too were glad to see it; after so long and in this state, the one thing you wanted was to have it in you no matter what entrance.

And like a famished species, you crawl your way towards him. Holding onto the back of his thighs to pull him closer to you. The action made him stumble but he laughed at your desperation. Hand going to your hair, threading his fingers through it and holding your head firmly to look at him.

“Want a taste?” He takes a hold of his heavy sex, taunting you by slapping it against your cheeks and watching your agape mouth chase after it. You nodded hurriedly, leaving behind any shame and pride just to taste him once more.

Pulling your head closer and watching your mouth open more, Haechan lets his tip grace your lips before pushing your head away. Eliciting a pained whine; he crouched down to your level, his tight hold on your head not leaving and making you look directly in his eyes.

“No. You don’t deserve this much.” His words were low and full of hatred, his eyes boring holes onto your own. If hell was real, you had just seen it through them.

Dropping his grip from your hair, he helped you get on all fours. You could feel both of you sinking further into the sand and the blanket doing its best to not allow it to get near you two but his rugged actions weren’t helping the poor thing.

Instead once you were positioned before him, he pushed your top half further down, enough for your head to lay on your arms and your lower half lifted to his crotch. As much as he didn’t want to grant you any more pleasure, Hyuck couldn’t hold himself back when he saw your glistening cunt under the sun, begging him to taste you.

Your legs spread enough for him to see every crevice full of the arousal he caused. Fuck it. This was for him, not for you and he wanted to grant himself the pleasure of tasting you again.

Just when you were going to whine and beg for him to fuck you, you felt his lips attach to your cunt making you moan louder than you have in a while. He grunted at your reaction; it was music to his ears, hot enough to travel to his angry cock and twitch with precum spurting out.

He felt your legs shake, not even his tight hold on them could make you stop. Haechan’s tongue swiped from your entrance to your clit, collecting your juices there and sucking on the bud to take them into his mouth. Proudly swallowing what you made for him. He hummed directly against your cunt, the warm vibration sending you overboard.

“Hyuckie…” You moaned that sweet name again, his cock twitching at your cracking voice. He didn’t want to succumb to you, after all you’ve put him through the last thing he wanted to do was please you but damn that would happen regardless when fingering and eating you out was his favorite thing to do.

His nails dug into the skin of your ass cheeks, harsh grip eliciting a yelp as he continued to delve into the taste of your arousal. A delicacy if you ask him. Tongue teasing your entrance to the point just enough of the tip penetrated you.

You tried your best in touching yourself or at least rubbing him off with your feet but he always pushed you away, grunting at your disturbance. Feeling his tongue lap at your folds, circling around your clit, and sucking on it harshly then softly. Becoming a pattern that throws you into a frenzy.

Feeling your stomach coil and your legs start to give up on you, you begged him to just finish you off. To let you cum since he hadn’t done so when he was fingering you but he didn’t budge. Instead he continued his assaults on your sex; his face had pushed further in and you could feel how his soft rosy cheeks collected your cum on them.

You wanted to see his face badly. To see how you’ve stained it and glisten in the sunlight. If he already looks beautiful, you believe your essence will make him even more so.

“I didn't want to treat you and look where you have me. You’re so lucky I love you.” He grunts, laying his tongue flat on your cunt. You laugh at his statement but hear it become a moan at that. His warm, soft, velvety tongue licking away your own mockery.

You feel his hand come flat on your ass, whipping your head to look at him but his cold glare didn’t allow for any words to leave your mouth, not even the moan that was product of his harsh treatment. “Are you close?” He grins, separating himself from between your legs. Fingers collecting your arousal and pushing it into his mouth.

Nodding feverishly, you bite your lower lip. Watching him thoroughly suck on his nimble fingers, not leaving a drop behind. Your breathing was labored and you could feel sweat accumulate where his hands had been holding you; you were no longer cold. Donghyuck’s actions alone elicited shaky moan after moan but what caused them to come with no end was how beautiful he looked behind you.

His caramel locks stuck to his forehead, perspiration threatening while his honey skin glowed under the sun’s rays. The same rays that made the lower half of his face glisten with the layer of your cum he was graciously licking at. The longer you looked at him, the longer you noticed how his lips were swollen red and his fingers pruning up.

He didn’t lie when he said he loved your taste.

What you intended to let out as a moan came out as a cry. Feeling your heart heavy and needy but most of all your stomach felt sick. Twisting and turning in hopes that he was to finally fill you up like you had asked.

You were also needy and the image behind you made that worse; you felt desperate. The kind where you could throw a tantrum for not getting what you want and what you want is his cock to your hilt. Letting his frustrations out on you.

“Is my baby needy? Are you that needy?” He mocked. Pouting his lips to grip your hair again, lifting your head slightly before leaning in and pulling you to him. You nodded with a whine, chasing his lips but even that he denied until you sighed in frustration.

“Tell me how much you want it.” He pecked your lips, taunting you every time he pulled away. “Tell me how much you need and want my cock…” His grip tightened on your hair, a cry leaving your lips against his own. He swallowed it, tongues connecting instantly in a sloppy kiss.

“Only mine.”

He growls in a low voice against your lips. Glaring directly into your eyes with the tightest grip on your hip and hair. And though he searched for any guilt from you, he was met with your own angry glares, getting fed up with his elongated foreplay.

“I do want it. I’ve wanted it for so long but I was not going to give you the satisfaction of touching me just yet. Call this your actual Christmas present.”

Your voice filled with its own pent-up irritation, glaring at him the longer he kept you from feeling good just because of his jealousy fits. Here he could see you hadn’t put it all past you but instead ignoring it until he fucked your brains out. He didn’t know whether to laugh or continue his bitterness but what he did know was that his dick was hard and hurting from his own restraint.

“And I beg that you release all your frustrations out right now because my abstinence better be worth it.” You let out through gritted teeth, eliciting a bitter and angry chuckle from him. “Because one of us has to be loyal.” Your pupils shake, enlarging the second he releases his grip and harshly pushes your head away.

Your labored breath became louder every second he shuffled behind you. His tight grip on your hip pulling you towards him whilst his tip rubbed against your delicate cunt. For a moment he halted any of his actions, the background noises becoming overwhelming and your throat betraying you by releasing silent cries. At least only you could hear them.

But he took that silence away, letting strings of spit slide from his tongue to your entrance and using it as extra lubricant before penetrating you. He was different from Mark. While Mark was long, Haechan was girthy and with just the first few centimeters in, you could feel the stretch his fingers hadn’t granted you.

Those earlier cries became louder, struggling to cover your mouth the longer he pushed himself in you. It wasn’t painful but it felt foreign . It had been months since he’s been in you that your body was beginning to forget how he felt. While he hadn’t moved just yet, his pretty groans became the source of your satisfaction.

It didn’t take him long to start moving. His strokes were slow but long, rugged if you will but they knocked pretty disgruntled noises out of you and that was enough for you both.

While he thrusted into you, his hands moved from your hips to your waist all the way to your breast. His warm hands enveloping them, massaging and squeezing softly.

His hands were soft in comparison to Mark’s that became calloused the longer he continued with harsher techniques in his projects. They’re also warmer, was it because of the sun coming out or his body temperature; you found yourself to rejoice in his touch.

In that instance his thrust became harder, fingers toying and twisting your nipples before pinching them. First softly then hard enough to elicit a masochistic cry. “Hyuckie!” You yelp in pleasure, hair covering your pretty face. He lets one of his hands fall from your tit, reaching for your hair and pushing it away just to see how your features contorted for him.

Just like you enjoyed seeing his soiled face, he liked seeing your expressions from pleasure.

“Scream my name all you want. No one’s here but you and I!” Donghyuck laughs, kissing your sweaty skin with each of his thrusts. But it wasn’t just you two, there will always be Mark.

Having woken up minutes prior; Mark’s habit of searching for you early in the morning led him to tip-toe around the house searching for any sign of you — and your husband to avoid problems — but when he had no luck even in the pits of the basement, he knew there was only two options at hand.

One: Hyuck and you abandoned him for the grocery shopping you both had mentioned in the car ride. Or two: his dear best friend had taken you to the beach. And given the car and keys were where they had been placed last night, the clear choice was the latter.

Not giving it much thought and only pulling the sweater he tossed on the couch the night prior, Mark groggily made his way behind the house. Dragging his feet and blocking the incoming sun rays with his hand. Struggling through branches and pesky rocks; Mark knew he’d be disappointed the second he saw you two but he didn’t expect to be heart broken.

At most Mark expected to see you two hold tightly like you had been when arriving to Magi’s house or holding hands while walking along the shoreline but here he was hiding behind a boulder, freezing from the shade and breeze, and witnessing his best friend fucking you.

Donghyuck no longer held you from behind, instead he had helped you onto your back. With one leg up on his shoulder and another around his waist, the position made him go deeper than before. All Mark could focus on was your moans. They were so genuine and raw that it broke him when he heard you utter: “Fuck, I missed you...”

He didn’t notice when his mouth had gone agape or when his chest began feeling heavy but Mark felt sick and no one could fix that. It didn’t help that Hyuck took your lips with his, ensuing in a passionate kiss that held both of your anger and desire whilst spewing vile on how you were his and his alone. The only thing holding him up is that you didn’t confirm his statement.

Mark wanted nothing more than to stomp where you two laid and tear Hyuck apart from you. To feel his clenched fist come in contact with his perfect cheeks and not stop until that crimson liquid he’s always been scared of told him to stop. He wanted to keep his best friend away from you and tell him to never come near you again. Scream how you were his and his alone— just like Hyuck was claiming for himself.

But he couldn’t move. His feet had sunk in the wet sand and his legs felt weak. He only had the willpower to move a few more steps and it was either his impulses or head back home and slump in the comfort of his room. Yes, Mark has decided to wallow his sorrows privately.

With a knot in his throat, Mark dared not look behind and instead walked as quickly as his wobbly legs allowed him. His hope hadn’t dwindled but it had been hurt.

While Mark tried maintaining his composure, not allowing his world to come crashing around him for the second time this year, both you and your husband remained clueless. Too enthralled with the pleasure and satisfaction you both granted each other.

Holding off for months was beginning to catch up with Donghyuck and it showed with the pained cries he’d spill whenever he felt himself close. Each thrust he gave, you could feel spurts of precum shoot into you and slide against your walls, just for them to coat his cock and push it further in.

You had lied about your abstinence but sex was sex and you had been craving his touch for a while. You just had to settle for Mark for the time being. Whimpers and moans escaped your lips, begging him to swallow them every time you’d pull him by the hair, connecting your lips in sloppy kisses.

Amused by your reaction, Haechan laughed into the kiss, teeth nipping your lips and occasionally tongue before caressing it with his own to soothe the sting. He wouldn’t let the kiss last for too long, opting to see you whine from the separation. It’s the least suffering he could cause you in the meantime.

“Close?” He questions, his palm holding your upper thigh close to his waist. By this angle his pelvic bone began creating friction against your clit. Fingers digging into the flesh of your thighs, mouth leaving a trail of kisses from your lips to neck and chest.

His teeth teased your nipples, scraping them along the warm flesh to deliver a sharp bite that resulted in you crying masochistically, pushing his head further to have him do it again. Your free hand scratched his back, digging into his flesh and moaning along his pained groans.

Even in sex you two had to hurt each other.

“Finish me off, Hyuckie. I can’t last longer and I know neither can you…” You mewl, tugging his hair to let him know you wanted his attention. He looked up at you through lashes, moisture clinging to them, perhaps in the process his eyes watered.

Words wouldn’t leave his pretty plump lips though. Instead he nodded, leaning in to capture your lips between his, rushing his thrusts and making them rougher. You liked feeling him stretch you out more, feeling him squeeze in as the perfect fit and feel his tip kiss your walls. Coating them with his cum was your favorite part out of it all.

A few more thrusts and heavily passionate kisses, your walls began clamping around him. Causing poor Donghyuck to feel sensitive at the pressure. It wasn’t long until he came; thus when he felt your legs shake around him and your grasp tightened, he knew his ecstasy was near.

Crying and whimpering against his lips; your eyes shutting harshly at that tight knot in your lower stomach. Hyuck’s thrusts were getting sloppy, within seconds you felt him at your hilt and you couldn’t hold off much longer. That knot had loosened completely and sent you overboard, gushing around him with a loud moan, holding him for dear life against you; small praises and cooing leaving your lips.

“You know my body so well, I could have you like this forever…”

Your voice was the catalyst. With your heavy panting against his lips, Hyuck didn’t hold off anymore and allowed himself to come. You along with him whimpered at the feeling of being filled up with his load; a wave of pleasure washing through you both until it faded and all that was left was a tingling sensation that didn’t leave your bodies.

Opting to stay in that position for a bit longer, both your breathing had calmed down. Your nails didn’t rake harshly against him and his teeth no longer nipped at your skin sadistically. Now the kisses were soft to avoid speaking. Both knew if any words spilled, they’d leave an ache.

The minutes passed, all that was heard were waves crashing against each other and the boulders. It was warmer now and perhaps much later, enough for your friend back in the house to be awake. Hyuck was the one to take the initiative in getting off of you and cleaning you off with some of the water he packed.

He didn’t speak and neither did you, the most you could muster was to look at him in silence, his soft touches creating a complex feeling in your heart. At that moment you too wanted to just leave and go back inside.

“Did you eat breakfast?” “No. I went straight to the pool.”

He hums, putting his trunks back on and stuffing the towels in the beach bag. “Mark is probably awake. We can get something on the way to the market if he hasn’t made anything yet.” His voice was hoarse, with some laced pain on it. You gave him a side smile, tying back the swim suit and placing a beach dress over.

“He’d smoke a pack before eating breakfast. Sometimes I have to force him to have a proper meal.” You giggle, shaking off the sand from the blanket you two laid upon minutes prior. Haechan forces out a laugh, his smile quickly fades.

Right. You took care of Mark.

Donghyuck had expected this experience to make him feel better about his marriage. He wanted to think this was meant to settle the peace between you both but instead he felt worse. His chest felt warm and heavy and his eyes threatened to spill tears. Some had during the act but he did his best to not weep.

He fully understood the marriage turning this way was his fault, you had told him so many times even insinuated it way before he met the catering girl but that didn’t hurt as much. He was comfortable enough with how things went on between you two before Mark arrived. At least if it meant that it was him the one you’d think about. The only one you’d both love and hate.

What did make him feel this way was hearing you come into the room after 3 AM and smell like his best friend. How often you spend time with Mark and enjoy his company. And worst of all is that you hadn’t put anything behind.

The reason you had been civil with Donghyuck was simply because Mark was there to satiate your needs. It had only gotten to this point of accepting his touch because you were starting to get bored of Mark just like you had with him not too early into the marriage. Or so he thinks, that is was your actions are making both believe at least.

There were only a few steps left to reach the top. While Hyuck was contemplating this bond, you seemed the most aloof. There was some brightness to you and a careless attitude. On one of those steps you turned to look at him, his face was getting red and you knew it wasn’t from the sun. Something was bothering him.

It’s not like you cared to know but that gloominess was interfering with your relaxation. Stopping on your tracks and pulling him along, Hyuck throws you a confused look. You didn’t say anything yet, you simply smiled at him softly and caressed his warm cheek. He eased into your touch, feeling your soft fingers dance across his taut skin.

“I love you, Donghyuck.”

As much as he’s yearned hearing those words, this time he doesn’t know how much to believe them anymore.

“I love you too.”

They came out in a whisper, one you swallowed upon connecting your lips one last time that moment. He didn’t want to think much about it. There was a chance you were lying or that like him, you loved him in a baneful way.

Yes, that is most plausible.

He wasn’t the only one to hear your profession of love. Poor Mark had lounged around the back porch with a pack of cigarettes to his side. Like said before it wasn’t too long until you two reached the top and though you didn’t intend for Mark to hear or see everything he has this morning— it just happened.

Reaching the top by the time Mark let out a puff of smoke in desperation; a sigh at most. Smelling that familiar stench, you both turned to see him lying upon the white outdoors couch his father had decorated with.

“Morning.” Hyuck breaks the ice, giving his friend a tender smile that you mimic. Mark didn’t dare look at you both for too long, nodding in return while taking a sip of his drink. “Morning; Where were you guys?” He questions with a little pep in his words, trying his best to hide any negative emotion.

“Wanted to swim for a bit but the water was cold. Hey, did you have breakfast already? We can catch something to eat on the road before we get everything.” Mark lifts his cigarette with a smile before taking another drag, both you and Hyuck looking at each other remembering your conversation.

Hyuck chuckles with a nod. “Alright, gonna shower and we can leave after everyone’s ready, yeah?”

“Yeah.” “Sounds good.”

He let go of your hand that second, not waiting for you to follow behind as he rushed to the bedroom’s bathroom. Despite the interaction, his feelings were still a painful turmoil and if he looked at either of you for too long in the moment, he’d end up breaking in front of both.

Locking the door, Hyuck looks into the mirror before him. The bags beneath his eyes looked darker than before and his face had started to sink in. He didn’t look ill but he did look tired and sad. His cheeks weren’t as beautifully round in the time being and he knew that wasn’t good. After all, his round jumpy cheeks are your favorite thing about him. Maybe if he gained them back your ‘i love you’s’ would have real meaning to them.

He couldn’t contain it anymore. In the instance his thin fingers touched his equally thin face and let out that cry he’s been holding in this entire time. His tears felt boiling hot against his skin, the rivers of salt water wounding his face but that ache in chest was worse.

Donghyuck knew he still loved you. Hell, if he loved you through all the times you had called him useless, the times you avoided him during periods he felt like hell, and witnessed the times you made your own father cry by the way you treated him; then why wouldn’t he love you now that he accepted you yourself had an affair with his best friend? His brother.

He wondered how much he loved Mark too. Mark the boy he spent years of childhood with all up to college when both parted ways. The boy he’d let stay at his house every time his father reprimanded him for the smallest things even if they weren’t a mistake.

Mark was his wedding witness, the boy who approved of you when you two started dating and told him you were the perfect match. The boy who helped him find the perfect ring and arrangements. Mark and him have experienced many things together but sharing a lover is not one he thought they ever would. Especially not one he’s tied to by law and heart. As painful as it is.

Donghyuck bit into his fist before doing so into a towel, his silent sobs absorbed by the cloth. This was the best he could do without having you two hear him.

And while your husband is breaking to pieces in the shared bathroom, you make your way to the kitchen. Upon getting a water bottle, you felt the touch of two warm hands on your hips pulling you close to his body and turning you around to face him.

Mark didn’t show much expression, instead he pressed you against the cold steel doors. Looking at each other for a few seconds, he took initiative in connecting your lips. It shouldn’t have taken you by surprise the way it did but slowly you began to ease into his touch. You could taste the mixture of his cigarette and the orange juice he had been drinking.

Holding onto his shoulders, Mark’s own hands began to caress your body. One hand rested on your waist and the other went underneath your dress. He felt the warmth between your thighs. His fingers begin to caress the skin and make a silent gasp leave your lips. He took that opportunity to snake his tongue in your mouth.

By the time he pushed the fabric of your bikini bottoms to the side, his fingers prodded your entrance making your gasp become audible this time. When you were to moan his name, the man before you halted his movement. He separated from the kiss as well, looking at you directly the second he felt the globs of cum cling to his fingers.

Scooping it, Mark pulled his fingers out looking at them before you. He noticed the dark marks your husband sealed onto your skin. You were panting but there was no sign of regret on your face. Instead he was received with:

“What do you expect? He’s my husband.”

A threatening smile on your end tried to form but Mark couldn’t produce any words. He felt speechless and too hurt to even say anything. His face held a mixture of disgust, anger, and sadness.

With the simplest of words, you always manage to hurt them.

“Mark come on,” You call out, trying to get a hold of him but he avoids your touch. You softly scoff at the action but kept trying to at least ease the tension. “Come on, don’t be like that.”

He didn’t know what to say. Mark knew you were right, Hyuck was your husband but that didn’t stop his heart from breaking any less. All this time he hadn’t mind since you two openly hated each other but the quick change up was affecting him.

“Honey— Oh? What are you guys doing?”

Hyuck had come out of the restroom once his eyes had depuffed and he looked fine again. By the time he reached the kitchen he saw you two stand close to each other, a tense ambiance surrounding.

Mark threw you one last glance, “Nothing. I’m going to shower.” His voice sounded deeper and with that he walked away and to his own bathroom, leaving you alone with your husband again. Rather than tense, this one was awkward.

“The shower is ready, let’s go.” Haechan’s voice was laced with irritation.

The day you had been looking forward to this entire trip had come: New Year's Eve. The weather was finally thinking about the beach resident’s and decided it would be good to have the last day of the century be sunny all throughout. It may be December but a new millennium deserves a beautiful welcome.

Despite Mark’s gloomy demeanor, the both of you had been trying all morning to get him out of his room. Every attempt had been a failure and though neither of you showed it, Hyuck was beginning to get annoyed about the ordeal. Specifically your attention getting directed towards the older male. You may have been trying to balance your attention to both men but their selfish demands were making things harder.

“I’ll go try again and if not then I guess we can just go.” You give your husband a side smile, handing him the dishes to dry from your late lunch. He turned the instant they were in his hands, rolling his eyes at your insistence. “Just give him space, it’s the house that’s putting him in that mood. Makes him think too much about his old man.” But he knew his dad wasn’t the only reason he was this temperamental.

A low sigh escapes your lips, walking towards him and enveloping him in a back hug. “I don’t want him to end the year like this.” Your lips fell onto his neck, warm and soft on the flesh. He hated how much he enjoyed it. He doesn’t say anything, he simply shrugs with a low groan.

Donghyuck himself hadn’t been pleasant after the beach rendezvous, if anything he had gotten distant and silent. He always did this after sex but the worst part is that it drew you towards him in hopes to get more than a few words out of him. To get more affection. His affection.

While in the past he did it out of his selfish ways of obtaining gratification, this time he did it to avoid seeing how worried you had been for Mark. After the shower, you all had lunch in town and even browsed around the area, getting groceries for tonight. But while at it, he didn’t miss your subtle glances towards his friend who trudged behind the two of you.

If he left you two alone for just a second, he’d come back to the image of you whispering something to Mark who in return said nothing or hummed. It was no different for the remainder of the day whenever he was around but when it was just you two, it seemed like you remembered he was the one you married.

It’s not that you wanted to comfort them. You just wanted the reassurance that they were still eating from the palm of your hand and their little hissy fits were annoying you. At least for Donghyuck, he didn’t leave your side often and even now he was doing what you wanted him to— just reluctantly. As always.

As for Mark, he was being a nuisance. He was brooding like a teenager that didn’t get the car he wanted and was taking it out on all of you. Didn’t he understand that you were still married? You have to fill your role once in a while and if he hadn’t been so clingy for the past few months, you probably wouldn’t feel the need to try and get a breath of fresh air with Haechan.

Your worried facade fell the second you got out of Hyuck’s view and walked towards Mark’s bedroom. You didn’t knock, you had gotten used to walking in his room unannounced that he didn’t think about it either when he heard the creaky hinges.

“Move.” His sprawled limbs unconsciously responded to your words, scooting to one side of the bed and relaxing the second your weight dipped the mattress. All this time you hadn’t crossed the threshold of his bedroom. Compared to the one you and Donghyuck slept in; Mark’s was smaller with a horrid brown carpet and green walls.

His night stands were small of a bright yellow wood that did nothing to look good in the dark room. As ugly as the layout was, there were many trinkets of his childhood. From the multiple baseball lamps, cowboys, toy soldiers, and comics stacked on a desk that complimented the nightstands.

You’d say the most exciting part were the glowing stars stuck to the ceiling but by now they probably didn’t work anymore. His Poison Girl Friend, Depeche Mode, and Soda Stereo posters were wrinkled and on the brink of falling from the walls.

In every corner there were noticeable traces of all the years he was able to stay up until the last time his father told him he wasn’t allowed anymore. The most notable was the CD he was listening to now; the soft melody of Sade’s voice unconsciously making him stare intently at you.

‘I gave you all my love, I gave you all that I have inside and you took my love. I keep crying, I keep trying for you. There’ s nothing like you and I, baby…’

“I thought you didn’t like sports.” You smile up at him, scooting closer and closer but he doesn’t budge. His lips don’t move and his eyes tear away from you, glancing quickly at his lamps before looking up at the ceiling.

With no response and your patience beginning to run out, you turn to him. In a few quick moves your hands encased his face and brought your lips to his, landing a soft kiss against them. As angry as he was, he would never deny you a kiss. His mind, soul, and body took over allowing him to return it, shifting to where it was comfortable.

His hands took a hold of your waist, holding to you for dear life. His body missed you and it showed with the way he caressed you. His large hands slowly make their way under your shirt, squeezing your sides while his teeth softly nip your lower lip eliciting a gasp granting him access to your mouth and slipping his tongue.

“You can’t keep doing this…” He moans against your lips, deepening the kiss and bringing your body closer to him. You wanted to ask what he meant but it was quite obvious. Mark didn’t follow up, rather basking in the comfort of your body and mouth. Enjoying the sweet taste of the blueberry parfait you had for lunch, on your tongue.

He missed this. He missed having you all for himself, having you near him. Today’s kiss felt nothing like that day and as much as the memory pains him, he’s going to enjoy these few minutes.

His tongue caressed yours one last time before both your lungs decided they needed some relief. Panting when separating, Mark kisses the side of your mouth before admiring your features. “You’re forgetting about me now that he wants to touch you?” His voice was much harsher than he intended but that deep rooted anger seemed to be winning.

Your smile falters, “Are you still mad at me?” The mixture of annoyance and worry interlacing in your voice. “He’s still my husband, Ma—” He cut you off with a scoff, throwing his head back and opting to lay on his back once again. “So what? Suddenly you care that he is? What about all these months you’ve been with me?” He didn’t dare look at you, he was afraid you’d have that pout that always made him cave.

“Why are you even acting this way all of a sudden? Out of nowhere you two like each other again? Do you want me to remind you how I saw you two the day I arrived at the apartment?” He tried to shut his mouth but it had a brain of its own. Mark was beyond annoyed with your actions and neglect.

“I guess we just made peace for now.” Your meek response brewed a scowl on his face, shaking his head in response. “What about our plans, y/n? I already told you to go with me. You were so miserable before I got here, do you really want that again? I leave tomorrow. I thought you didn’t want me to leave. Isn’t that why this all started? I’m the only one here for you.”

Mark didn’t seem to hold back any longer. Envy and rage were consuming him the longer he held everything in. He was right, without him, you and Hyuck would probably live like strangers til now with only arguments as communication.

With a heavy heart and gloom look on your face — hiding your frustration — you come closer to him. Returning that chaste kiss on the corner of his lip and wrapping your arm around him as you lay your head on his chest. “Don’t be that way, Mark. I don’t want to end the year and start a new one with you like this. I’m here now aren’t I?”

Truly you wanted to let out a scoff but your words seemed to do it for him. He was convinced worry had washed upon you.

“I need you. You know that, right?” “You need me?”

“More than anything.”

You wanted to tell him he was an idiot but you were glad needed you. Yeah, he was now going to use that.

What made it better for him was that Hyuck had just passed by and saw the way you clung to Mark’s body. He was able to see the life drain out of his best friend’s being. His color became dull and his face dropped. You couldn’t hear it but Mark fully heard Haechan’s heart break and stomach drop at the image.

It was his turn to rub it in his face.

“What’s going on?” His shaky voice made you separate from Mark, sitting up in panic and a thumping heart. But God were you good at hiding your emotions. When your eyes had met with Hyuck’s you threw him a quick smile, stretching your hand out for him to take. He was hesitant, not wanting you to see how shaky he had become but he took it nonetheless.

Mark hadn’t sat up to see what you two were doing but he could feel the movement on the side of the bed and the dip on the large mattress when you had pulled your husband onto it. Your attention was again taken away from him, as was your touch.

How quickly his spell died within you.

“Telling Mark he should enjoy the last day. It’s either that or welcome the century a loser. His choice.” You joked. Hyuck released an airy laugh, shaking his head. “You want to get out of the house, dude? Some of the locals just dropped off an invite for a beach New Year’s party.” His soft hands reached to envelope you the way you had Mark.

“If you guys are cool with it.” It’s all he musters. “Then it’s settled. Now, I need all of you to finish cleaning around and get ready for dinner.” You playfully glare at both, in return Haechan smiles, kissing you tenderly as a response; Mark a spectator to his demise.

While cleaning around his bedroom and the rooms you had told him to, worked to distract him in the meantime. Those same ill thoughts gushed through his brain the minute he was done getting ready. Looking at himself through the mirror. Glancing at his every detail, Mark sighs in hopes that tomorrow his plans flourish.

From times Hyuck stayed home during the weekends it was never this bad. You always avoided him and opted to spend time with Mark but things had taken a turn this time. Your husband stuck to your hip and you didn’t seem to mind. Especially not after telling him you loved him.

Regardless if there was something Mark had, it was hope and he hoped that tomorrow by this hour you two will be putting away your items into a moving truck to place in his new apartment. This millennium is going to be a new start for you both. Together.

In the process of making his way to the living room, Mark saw no sign of either of you. Smoothening his dress shirt while picking at the side dishes. All these hours of malnourishment were finally getting to him. He just hoped you didn’t scold him for not eating or for messing up the presentation of your dish.

This was something else that seemed to make him realize how much Donghyuck was impeding what you two had. Never in the past months have you let Mark skip meals but these few days, you barely checked up on him. How can things go south so quickly? While Mark internally complained about the changes, your husband calmly sat on the same couch Mark had lounged on that awful afternoon.

Donghyuck sat pensive, a cigarette in hand and a six pack on the glass table. Worry and sadness were visible but Mark didn’t pry. His mind only cared for his problems and feelings about you. He couldn’t care less that Hyuck legally had you.

Mark’s only solace were your passionate kisses and tender words from earlier letting him know you were there for him. How you didn’t make excuses on why you held him earlier the second Haechan saw you two. Or how before this trip, you’d always run to him rather than Hyuck when in need of company.

You wanted him, not Donghyuck. He’s sure of it.

“Invite next time.” Mark laughs, playfully slapping off his friend’s feet from the table so he can pass by. Sitting besides the younger of the two, Mark glances at him, an awkward smile following behind. Donghyuck returns it while handing him a bottle and the box of cigarettes he found on your night stand. You didn’t smoke but it seemed like you kept some for Mark.

“It’s been a long run, dude.” Mark continues. Despite holding resentment, Donghyuck will always be his savior and best friend. “It has, hasn't it? Almost thirty years together.” The honey brunette laughs, blowing smoke out and taking a swig of his drink. “It kind of sucks we didn’t get to spend the time you were with us together. Sorry about that.”

Donghyuck’s head hangs low, the cigarette between his lips dropping ashes on the floor. In a sense Mark shared that sentiment. Deep down behind the rancor and hate, he loved Donghyuck. Even if Donghyuck himself wondered how much he loved Mark.

“You leave tomorrow and all I can take away from your stay is this trip.” Despondency held tight onto his words. What he truly took away was his betrayal but sometimes he was a coward and opted to stay silent. “Really wish we did more.” He sighs, Mark’s gaze floods with apologies.

Mark didn’t understand why his guilt was manifesting itself now. Maybe because it was just them two and your presence didn’t cloud his judgment. The possibilities are endless but when it’s just them two— Mark is aware that Donghyuck has always been there to take care of him. Kinda like you take care of him.

While in the past he was aware he slept with his best friend’s wife and was wrong in a sense. Now it was punching his chest while screaming that he was an asshole. He didn’t know whether to take responsibility or blame his father’s home for cursing his existence. Maybe if you three didn’t stay here things would’ve been different and he’d gone back to not feeling as much remorse.

“We have an entire lifetime to do things together, Hyuck.” Mark finally gets a word in, exhaling through his nose while his fingers thread through his hair. A smile tugged at his lips, turning to his friend to deliver. The other returns it, a contagious chuckle plaguing both.

“Remember when your dad bought the play set and placed it by the beach between the boulders?” The image of younger Mark and Donghyuck around the ages of seven running around the slippery sand painted itself on Donghyuck’s brain. He closes his eyes, those warm hues of the summer’s sky were memorable.

Mark laughs, taking large gulps of his now warm drink. Sticking his tongue out from the disgusting taste. “And we turned it to face the beach because we thought the slide was long enough for us to slide all the way into the water. Just for you to slip on the steps and I slid straight into a boulder—”

“And we both broke our arms!”

The two said in unison, laughing at the memory. This is one of the things they could share. “Some stupid seaweed stuck to my foot and it made me slip. I just remember screaming on the way down and waking up in the room with the cast already on.” Donghyuck speaks through laughs.

Mark mimics the action, the smoke of both their cigarettes getting to him. “Dad was so mad when Taeyong ran screaming about what happened but he was more concerned with the fact that he dropped his bucket of crabs inside the house than us.” Mr. Lee has always cared more about the materialistic aspect than his own family, even at such an early age. Regardless, that was the only time he’s seen Mark’s father care for his friend.

“It’s kind of surreal I’m not gonna see you guys anymore until who knows when. I’ve gotten so used to you; it’s a little different from when I used to see you all the time as kids and growing up but living with you has changed everything.”

“How so?” Donghyuck was curious what he meant. Yes, things have changed but he wanted to hear his friend’s reasons. “For starters, I got closer to y/n.” Mark had no malice in his words but Hyuck didn’t see it that way. He was already on edge for the way he saw you two earlier and all the occurrences in the past month so the mere mention of you was throwing away that sweet moment they just shared.

Haechan’s tongue pokes at the inside of his cheek, shoulders tensing while glaring at Mark. The older one doesn't notice just yet. As his eyes rake Mark’s figure, they spot a familiar piece wrapped tightly onto his wrist. Compared to your bracelet, Mark’s was worn out and a few threads from ripping off. The beads had lost their color and the once bright blue was now faint, almost gray.

“I can tell.” There no longer was warmth to Hyuck’s voice. It was hoarse and deep, clogging Mark’s eardrums and forcing him to look at his younger friend. That intense and angry glare confusing him but when it comes to you, even he can’t help but get defensive.

Mark squints, taking the last sip of his drink and tossing the bottle to the side. “I’d say she probably took your spot as best friend.” He jokes but it doesn’t translate well with Donghyuck who bitterly chuckles. “She said the same before she gave me these.” Pulling down the collar of his shirt, Hyuck points at the slowly fading markings on his neck.

That’s when things came crashing upon Mark. His comfort and happy bubble had burst and reality flooded around him. Why would Donghyuck just blatantly hurt him like this? Rub in that he could show off your love publicly while he had to hide it.

“Looks like I have a new best friend.” Mark ignores the action, inhaling harshly against the cigarette butt not caring about the stinging warmth against his fingers. “But you’re my best friend.” Hyuck whines, his voice playfully pitched but his eyes dark and sharp.

“And if I replace you?” Mark taunts the younger, raising an eyebrow in defiance. When Hyuck was to answer, the clicking of heels distracted them. Turning to the interruption, the two gawked at your figure. The glare of your sparkling dress was brighter than the lightbulb outside. If anyone saw, they looked like moths attracted to a light source.

While fixing your hair delicately, the two admired how the fabric hugged your every crevice. How it wasn’t long enough to cover your legs, the legs they loved so much. And when looking up directly at your face, makeup only enhanced how beautiful they already found you.

“Can one of you zip up my dress? I just did my nails.” You explain walking closer to them. Naturally Hyuck was going to stand up to do so however Mark had beaten him to it. Smiling at you who in return ignored it while blowing at your hands, fanning them to quicken the process.

You didn’t care who had taken the responsibility but they did. While Mark basked in the joy of doing these small things for you, Donghyuck glared at what happened before him. He couldn’t directly see how Mark slowly pulled at the small zipper. His fingers traced patterns on your back to have a feel of you just one more time. Even if it was this simple. And when he found the metal to reach its end, disappointment wasn't too grand as he was able to enjoy your body again.

“There.” Mark says with a smile pulling away. He hadn’t fully forgotten about the younger male but he would much rather enjoy your presence. “Thank you.” You return the gesture, throwing him a soft toothy smile.

How he loved your smile.

“You look beautiful, honey.” An aggravating voice cut through the moment. Pulling you towards him, Donghyuck takes you into his arms after spinning you around. You giggle at his comment, patting his chest to calm the giddiness.

“You think so?” Your eyelashes flutter trying to avoid his gaze, glad the blush from makeup could disguise the warmth rising onto your face. “You’re the most beautiful woman I know, y/n.” He confirms in a husky voice, his lips slotting with yours in a quick tender kiss to not ruin your lipstick. Not that it matters, in minutes it’ll be gone with the final dinner.

Reluctantly separating, Donghyuck chuckles when your eyes meet. Satisfied with the shy smile slapped across your face. “Right, Mark?” He looks at his friend, head lifting slightly just to see how his body will react.

It was to say that Mark had been taken aback. Worst yet, when you turned to look at him, a sheer blank expression was there in comparison to how you looked at Donghyuck just seconds prior.

It’s fine. It’s fine, you have to put up a front — like you have with Hyuck — before you two leave tomorrow and leave this smug asshole behind.

“Yeah. Truth be told you are, y/n.” His voice had dropped an octave. Taking the box of cigarettes from the table, Mark turns on his heel towards the house. “I’ll get the wine from the basement.” Leaving you two behind and the clanking of his dress shoes following him.

The interaction had soured the mood. When minutes prior you two happily kissed, right now Donghyuck was battling with his tongue to keep itself shut. But not even biting it was going to make him avoid the following conversation.

Once inside and placing the plates for dinner; Hyuck’s tongue had won the battle against his teeth and the brewing venom slowly slips. “Y/n?” He calls out, smoothening the cloth napkins. You don’t spare him a glance, humming in response with a scowl when noticing Mark’s traces in one of the side dishes.

“I know you and Mark have gotten close but could the affection dial down?” Your attention was now fully on his words. While you enjoy knowing he’s growing weary, a part of you feels annoyed at his request. “What do you mean?” Your actions stopped, attentive to whatever he has to say towards the subject.

He looks at you momentarily before placing the cutlery. His shoes try their best to distract with their squeaky sound. “There’s hugging him as a greeting and then there’s hugging him while laying in bed. Or him zipping you up. There's a limit to things y/n.”

The cascade of silent meek words had instead furthered your irritation. Turning to fully face him, indignation smothered your face. “Why? Do you not trust me?” He refuses to look at you, resting his weight on his extended arms against the table.

“I didn’t say that.” “Sounds like it.”

He feels your persistent glare, the radiating heat burning holes into his flesh. Hell, he could see the smoke wafting towards his eyes to keep him blind. However Donghyuck musters a deep sigh, rubbing at said organs with defeat.

“I just want you to care for my concerns.”

Mark’s presence didn’t allow for your vexatious response. For the most part you were glad; this was bound to go south with you throwing in his face what he’s done. The cycle will never end. At least for now you’ll rest assured that he’s aching like you’ve wanted him to.

Subsequently the dinner was tough to go through. While small talk made itself present, it was never long enough unlike the clinking of glasses, cutlery, and the background noise of the TV informing you all of how in hours the transition to the new year will be made. Things followed that way until you all got ready again and made your way to the beach.

While it wasn’t crossing the line to Mr. Lee’s property, it wasn’t far enough for you all to drive there. With around three glasses of wine down, two shots, and the beer bottle in each one of your hands; claiming you two were being boring, Mark had managed to tranquilize the ambiance and get you two to relax.

Through giggles or full on cackling, both men argued while recalling yet again another one of their anecdotes in this same beach. Most of them being of the torment they made Mark’s older brother Taeyong endure.

“You guys suck. I know what it feels to see their pet be made into a meal.” You pout at the story they had just finished telling. A butterfly effect had taken place that summer when the boys broke their arms. To tease the older of the three; Mark and Donghyuck had tossed his pet crabs around the beach. Through tears and whining from Taeyong, Mr. Lee had forced them to chase after the few they could salvage.

But their chances were slim and given the play set was already in their search area, the faith of the youngest two had been told. Mark’s and Donghyuck’s malicious actions led to a temporarily long painful period. Sadly to say that even Taeyong suffered from the happenings. Mr. Lee had already been angry at the boy’s actions regarding the crabs and when his eldest son had rushed in exasperatedly to the point he dropped the bucket of said pets inside the home— their faith had been sealed the instant Lee senior blamed them for everything.

That afternoon arriving from the hospital, Taeyong’s pets had become a delicious meal for the Lee family. Much to Taeyong’s disapproval and hunger strike that week.

“Come on pretty girl. We were like, what? Seven?” Hyuck defends in between laughs, his arm wraps around your shoulders to leave a sloppy kiss on your cheek. You scowl at the action, a smile following suit when he leaves another one to tease you.

While Mark wasn’t enjoying the view, he didn’t want to sour the mood. You all had finally been able to go back to what you’ve all known and he knew how much it meant to you to end and start the year well. If he has to cut off his tongue and gouge his eyes out to keep the peace, then so be it.

“I would’ve cared but those little shits always pinched me any chance they had.” Mark spews jokingly, pinching Hyuck softly to emulate the pets. Comically exclaiming his pain, Donghyuck adds a quick jump to his step. Alcohol was getting to them but you won’t complain. Behind the remorse, you wanted to see your boys happy too. At least for now.

“Yeah, well it’s not fun being excited for your meal and suddenly while you’re almost done your family drops the fact that you’re eating your pet made into a pot roast.” The memory of Lola, your cow will always live in your heart. Even if she was a cunt.

“Pot roast sounds so good right now.” Donghyuck’s jesting insensitivity made Mark almost choke on his beer, coughing through laughter while you shove Hyuck off you. “Oh come on!” He laughs, trailing behind you until he grasps your waist and pulls you close to him.

He tries to contain his laughter but it escapes regardless. You weren’t mad to say the least, you just enjoyed teasing him in a different way. Resting his chin on your exposed shoulder, the honey brunette turns to kiss the crook of your neck. The smell of alcohol embedding itself on your skin.

“Isn’t Lola the one who kicked you? That you fell into the mud?” But no one could win against his mockery. “Well…” This time you couldn’t help but laugh along, the melody from your throat letting the other two know it was fine to laugh too. “It was a really good pot roast.”

Through laughter, jokes, teasing, and more drinking; within minutes the three of you found yourselves by the shoreline viewing the ebullience of every partygoer. String lights amongst every pole, clumps of people drinking and dancing amongst themselves. For miles all you could see were masses with glasses reading ‘2000’ or mardi gras beads.

Greeted with sparklers and beaded necklaces around your necks, the three of you swished the wands around. The yellow sparks fly off and dwindle quickly. “In case our bank accounts get drained or locked in a few hours… Cheers!”

It hasn’t been the easiest year or for that matter the best last years of the decade but if for just this night you’d all ignore your wrong doings then you’ll be assured that there’s something out for you. Seeing Donghyuck prance around with his best friend, the happiest smiles on their faces would have made you feel as giddy in the past but alcohol is treacherous.

While it treats them well, it’s tossing you around. Playing with your heart and brain, mocking you for what the universe will do to this friendship. You won’t deny that having Mark stay with you had brought back peace and happiness initially. But after a while of giving yourself to him, he became a bore, almost like you had drained him of any fun.

Donghyuck had turned out that way long before his friend arrived. Maybe it was because of work and the exhaustion it piled on him. But he was more silent and avoided you, especially whenever he knew an argument would happen. It may have bothered you but you failed to see that your constant berating had made his light dwindle.

Seeing them act so freely amongst themselves, laughing as if nothing has happened stabbed your chest over and over. It wasn’t guilt or sadness. On one hand you hated seeing them this happy while you weren’t but on the other, you’re glad that at least they can enjoy their company until the older one leaves. And after so long this is the first time you’ve seen them cling to each other lovingly. Like the brothers they were before all this.

But life will never grant you the gift of happiness. You’ve made too many mistakes to have that now.

While the hours passed in which you’d all laugh, danced, and sang about the bliss of life; Donghyuck parted momentarily from you two to get more drinks leaving you alone with Mark. The latter took this opportunity to close the gap Donghyuck had been occupying. Sliding his way to you and pressing himself against your back.

The sensation caught you off guard, exasperatedly looking around to make sure your husband wasn’t witnessing this. “Not here, he’ll get back soon.” You swallow the lump in your throat as your hands battled on whether to push him off or let the drunken lust win over.

A breathy sigh expelled from his lips, softly nipping where Donghyuck had kissed you upon arrival. “One last dance of the year, baby. You’ll kiss that asshole when the clock hits midnight let me have this at least.” The coarseness of his voice made your eyelashes flutter, the sensation of his chapped lips drawing you further into temptation.

Maybe falling victim to your needs one last time wouldn’t hurt.

Your hips began swaying against his own, pressing your back further into his chest whilst he held you tightly. Both dancing to the sensual melody without a care of the outside world. The trail of his fingers against your exposed skin left a boiling feeling. Your blood attracted to his touch like the first time.

You looked up at him through lashes, giggling when his own stare was glued to you. Mark himself chuckled when your eyes met, smiling while biting his inferior lip and leaning down to capture yours with his. Temptation had won against your restraints, forgetting that your husband wasn’t far away.

But a harsh tug made you stumble and the painful crack of Donghyuck’s knuckles against Mark’s cheek brought the two of you back to reality. Shock filled your body and your breathing felt short. It was all crashing down on you at the worst time. Twenty minutes till midnight, this will be your end.

“What’s your fucking deal, asshole?!” Mark angrily reproaches at his friend, holding his cheek, wincing with every touch. “What do you mean what’s my fucking deal? You’re kissing my wife, you dick.” Haechan pushes against Mark’s chest, making the latter stumble. He might be angry but a taunting chuckle leaves his lips.

“One of many times.”

“What did you say?!” Earning himself another push, this time nearly tripping over his feet. When he stabilized himself, he returned the gesture to the one assaulting him. “One of many times, dickhead! On your bed, couch, bathroom, kitchen, car, hours ago!” Definitely, Mark extends his arms in an open invitation to continue.

“If you weren’t such an asshole she wouldn’t have looked for someone else that could treat her better.” He gnaws the inside of his mouth, wincing again when accidentally gracing his cheek. Alcohol had proven to betray Mark. Hours earlier it was his best friend and aided him in loosening up but now it was spewing all his wrong doings and rubbing it in his brother’s face.

“Hyuck, it was just a kiss. Please, don’t make a big deal.” Your attempts at calming the situation had failed, instead making him grow angrier. How can it be just a kiss when Mark just confessed about your affair? “One fucking kiss? You stink of him almost every night. But no only I’ve fucked up!”

Donghyuck clicks his tongue, shaking his head with irritation. “If anything she’s only doing it to piss me off. She only fucks you to get it out of her system. This whole time she hasn’t run to you now that she has me. Her husband.” His venom clung to Mark, etching down every single one of his words onto his mind.

No. No, Mark knows you love him and you wouldn’t just use him. You love him. That word: husband. Husband can only mean so much when the people in the party are happy and not miserable like you all are. But why does it hurt every time it’s said without correlation to himself?

“You guys are fucking unbelievable. The year is about to end and you’re ruining it for me. You just had to be men, claiming and possessing as if we don’t have our own say. Useless as always!” Your angry words cut through their direct dialogue; turning to your figure walking away from the scene. People had started to pay attention however you’ll be damned before you’re the joke of any town.

They weren’t of any help, the two argued as they followed behind. Not too far to lose or not be associated with you. Regardless they’ll drag you down with them even if they don’t intend to.

“I’m tired of you throwing that word around as if it had any meaning to you. The same person that forgot his anniversary and left her crying and came back smelling like whores with cheap lipstick stains? Do I have to remind you how you threw the shirt away instead?”

You had reached your wits ends. In the instance Mark’s words left regarding your husband’s second plausible affair, you stopped in your tracks to look at both. The fiery pits of hell decorating your pupils and rivers of agony pooling at your waterline.

“But you reproach me about hugging mark? Are you fucking serious, Hyuck? Again?” A sob tried sneaking into your words, clutching onto your mouth to not let your voice betray you. You didn’t look back at them, if you knew anything about either is that Mark would smugly turn to Haechan and mock him while the latter tries to beg for more time.

Again. Donghyuck had been unfaithful to you in the past and just this night Mark was first hearing about it. Any guilt from earlier into the affair was now gone. If he could, so could you. The news might have killed him earlier but now he rejoices in knowing that no morality will stand between you and him anymore.

Donghyuck takes your hand into his. As much as you tug to get away from him, his grasp shows to have gotten stronger. “I haven't done anything! At most they threw themselves at me, you know the meetings are always at clubs, y/n. Please… I said I wouldn’t do this to you again, I promised.” The sob you failed to expel, he did instead.

You tried avoiding his sad puppy dog eyes but his touch will always be a weakness of yours. Regardless, you won’t let him see your vulnerability. Mark had witnessed it and instead he was using it against his friend’s neglect. They were all the same.

“You haven’t done anything?” Your voice slips between your gritted teeth. He shakes his head exasperatedly trudging behind while you continue until you’re finally by the sliding doors of the porch. “Just like you didn’t do anything with your catering girl?!”

The increase in tone of your voice catches both off guard. Confused but intrigued, Mark watches as you pull your arm from Haechan’s grasp while he’s left with trembling eyes. “I wish the cheek kisses were more than just that…” Hearing you recite the words, Donghyuck knew it was back to square one.

“Y/n, stop.” He begs, walking to reach you but you back away. “I want to hold you again and again. To wake by your side like last night. To feel your warmth and kisses until we both die.’ I want to hold you… feel your warmth until we die. You’re so full of shit.” The lump in your throat wouldn’t pass, it suffocated you with every passing second but it hurt more reminiscing the contents of those letters than dying from asphyxiation.

While he may be part of this, Mark was out of place in this instance. He was just another spectator now like all those masses outside.

“You can recite them all you want but I never lied to you about what happened.” His voice was apologetic with a lingering sadness after every word. “Right.” You roll your eyes, finally reaching for a glass of wine to sedate your anger.

“Yes! I never lied to you about what went on unlike you! You said it was purely platonic between you two. Indignation all over your face when I brought it up then and today and you still want to act like I’m the only liar.” Even now you couldn’t find it in yourself to admit you were wrong. At least not anytime soon in this lifetime.

Raising your glass with a shrug, “Okay, I fucked him. So what? You fucked her too. We’r–” “I never fucked her for fuck’s sake! Listen to me for once! I never fucked her! Kissed from time to time and slept in the same bed but we never fucked! You didn’t want to console me, so she did.”

Mark had been the shoulder you cried on when Donghyuck’s actions broke your heart but now you’re leaving the stubbornness behind to understand he had his own shoulder to cry on.

“You're supposed to be my best friend, my ride or die and instead you’re fucking my wife! You’re supposed to be my fucking brother!” Donghyuck screams out in a sob, turning on his heel to see a stunted Mark. The older of the three needed a long time to process what he was hearing.

Time has run out for you all. It was too late to forgive and forget. The fireworks illuminating the dark outside and screams of glee embedding itself into all of your minds. January 1st, 2000: The end of the world to many but for you three in particular.

All there left was disappointment and sadness. This isn’t how you wanted to start or end your year but consequences will always come to those with malicious intent. Even if it refers to revenge.

“Always have to ruin everything.” You spit out, glaring at your husband and directing it to Mark. The words stung in Donghyuck’s fragile heart. Enduring years of your vicious words was making it harder for him.

Things went for worse when you took Mark’s wrist into your hand, dragging him towards his room. The younger’s heart began beating achingly at the image before him. His ears went hot and he felt light headed seeing his friend comply with you.

“Wh- where are you going?” His question went unanswered.

“Y/n! Where the fuck are you two going?!” Panic constrained his mind. Many scenarios played in his head and they all ended the same way. With you and Mark intertwined on the smooth sheets of the bed. Caresses and kisses over nude flesh while he could do nothing about it.

All through the transcript of dragging Mark to his bedroom and locking the both of you inside, Donghyuck hadn’t stopped his whining and crying. Begging you to not do anything stupid and for you to stop this torment.

Truth be told, you believed that your husband hadn’t slept with the catering girl but it did hurt to know he went to someone else for comfort. While it is your fault he caused those extremities, you couldn’t help that rage within you. Bringing up the subject made you feel like that sixteen year old when your father’s way of coping with your mother’s death was by remarrying another woman.

Why couldn’t any of them just cope your way? Why did they always have to resort to other women? If they couldn’t deal with how you wanted them to, you had to make sure they felt your pain, one way or another.

The banging on Mark’s door kept getting louder by the minute. Donghyuck’s grueling cries begging you to get out of there brought a sense of peace while Mark felt terrified. He’s never heard Haechan beg like this for anything, not even as a child when he threw tantrums.

Moreover, Mark’s senses began to calm down as Donghyuck’s banging did too. All that’s left was hearing the younger sob through the wall begging you to not do something stupid and to think about the marriage. Under the impression that you had dragged his friend to fuck under his nose, Donghyuck was distraught and broken.

Once and for all, Mark felt triumph. He was the one you dragged inside with you. The one you’re laying next to even if it’s just to stare at the old glow in the dark stars stuck to his cieling. It was him you’ve chosen and that’s enough for him to know you loved him. Him, not your husband.

At what point did he go wrong? He’s always loved you even through insults and arguments that made his self esteem die. All he needed was someone to care for him in his lowest point and the person he needed most left for a three month work period. Leaving him to rot and wallow in the pain of mourning.

While he may not have loved the seaweed girl, he liked that she was there for him. But maybe that’s where he went wrong. Using her and giving her hope led to his bad karma and here he was, begging his vengeful wife to not fuck his best friend, his brother for who knows how many times. To spare him of any more pain but it was hopeless. Hope is a dangerous thing for a man like him to have.

Haechan had lost a brother that year and now he’s lost another.

The seasons had come to an agreement and decided to stick to what they’re known for. It was the coldest and gloomiest time to begin a millennium. In contrast to yesterday’s heat, today the prickling wind wouldn’t stop torturing your cheeks.

Streets were empty and stores had at least a handful of people. Everyone was either rejoicing the world didn’t end or hung over from all the alcohol that coursed their bodies. You only hoped many didn’t start it the way you three did.

“Welcome in! Order when you’re ready!”

The diner at the train station was the most packed compared to any other store you’ve passed by. While the elderly waitresses greeted everyone that went in, Donghyuck and Mark found each other sitting silently in one of the booths. You had decided to order some coffees but the line was longer than expected.

Nothing went past subtle glances and sighs. If it wasn’t for the no smoking inside policy, Mark would’ve pulled one out by now to aid his restlessness. As the seconds passed and you didn’t come back, the older of the two sighed one last time and finally decided to open his mouth.

“We didn’t do anything last night.” Hyuck doesn’t question or care to continue. Unlike him, Mark’s conscience was corroding. If you were to leave with him in minutes, he wanted to make peace with his oldest friend. There’s a chance his father will keep him around and whenever he sees the two of you at functions, he doesn’t want things to be awkward.

He shifts in his seat, leaning over the table. “I’m sorry things turned out this way. She’s just– I don’t know, she’s great.” He fondly chuckles yet Donghyuck’s chuckle was anything but that. If you were to follow Mark's plan, then Haechan hopes Mark can endure the hell you’ve put him through.

“I don’t care, Mark.” The eldest stops to look at his defeated friend. Hyuck had been playing with his wedding band while Mark talked and though it may cause a twinge of jealousy, it shouldn’t be long until he himself has one. RIght?

“I don’t care how things went. All I know is that you’re a fucking traitor. I could’ve expected this from anyone but not you.” Mark tries to apologize but Hyuck’s dark glare shuts him up. With all the pain he’s caused him, why is he acting like everything should be alright between the two? Maybe Mark and you did deserve each other.

“You know you’ll always be my best friend right? My brother.” Mark’s words weren’t malicious but after everything, Hyuck can only stare at him before letting out a scoff that comes out as a chuckle, granting Mark a grin of disbelief. “Yeah. I believe you.”

Mark responds with a smile but the sour taste in his tongue can’t be scraped away. He’s aware Donghyuck is being sarcastic, he just hopes in the future that he’ll forgive him. As much as this unknown feeling pains him.

“Here, I didn’t want to prepare them and have you two annoy me if it was too sweet.”

Nonchalantly you included yourself in their conversation as if last night’s scenario was nothing but a nightmare. Early in the morning you had woken them up, sweet talking both of them with a bright smile on your face. Things might have gone south but after a long restless night you weren’t going to let your year go to waste because of them. This is about you and you alone.

Consequently this is what Donghyuck was thinking about. How soon you were going to ignore any of your wrong doings and sweep them under the rug. You were going to force him to forget any ill word you’ve thrown at him for the sake of your peace without regard for his own.

He may be selfish now since the period of you finding out about his affair but he had learned from the best.

Regardless he couldn’t take it anymore and sought his way out towards the restroom where he could have some time alone. If he didn’t have at least five minutes he’d burst your bubble and it was best to not awaken that hurtful beast within.

Neither of you spared him a glance; raising your cup to be polite towards Mark, you take a sip of your coffee, biting your tongue after the liquid burnt it. “Do you want me to go get your ticket while he’s gone?” Mark breaks the ice again, his spoon swirling the mixture of liquids.

“Hm?” Your confusion catches him off guard, mirroring your knitted eyebrows as you take another sip of the coffee. “Train ticket, y/n.” He nervously chuckles, the spoon in his hand clanking against the table. His words didn’t ring a bell in your mind and all it caused was for an anxious whirlwind in his chest to form.

“For what?”

“You’re leaving with me aren’t you? I mean, you stayed with me last night while he cried his heart out. That should mean something, right? It was your answer, right?”

His voice pitched increasingly the longer you gave him a blank stare. “That’s just a normal argument. Why? Did you get scared?” You giggle, throwing him a smile, acting like you didn’t just burn your tongue for a second time now.

He tried his best to avoid the feeling of hate and sadness. In his brain you were just joking around with him. A part of him reassured him that at the last minute you’d tell Hyuck he could go to hell and you’d accompany Mark’s journey for eternity after. He was so sure of it after all he’s witnessed. But worry and doubt would never failed to fuck with him.

“Y/n… Last night you– I love you, y/n.”

“How low can one get to sleep with his brother’s wife? I don't see that as love.”

The sentence had cut deep in him, enough that no type of medication could cure the ache in his heart.

“We had plans, y/n for fucks sake.” His voice cracked, lips trembling ready to cry. “No, you had plans.“ It slips through gritted teeth, his eyes sharp like your tongue that spewed venom into his heart.

“If you took a second to listen to those plans, you’d realize how selfish and self centered they are.” You were beginning to get angry. Mostly for the fact that he’s bursting the bubble Hyuck was avoiding. The facade was over, Hyuck knew about you two, and Mark wasn’t being mindful of your own feelings.

“How?”

“How? I move out with you and start a new life in which I’ll be staying at home and you’ll work. How familiar does that sound?” The wind gushed outside, slapping the windows in order to make Mark put some effort.

“It’ll be different…” he cleared his voice, it was meek and silent, an obvious restraint in wanting to admit it wasn’t too different from what you have right now. “How is it going to be different, Mark? Tell me how.” The whirlwind in your own chest contradicted his. While he felt anxious you grew annoyed.

“So are you leaving with me today or not?” Mark raised his head, finally looking you in the eye. There should be a part of you that preferred him regardless, no? After everything you two have experienced and the way he’s made you feel, why wouldn’t you choose him? He needs you for fuck’s sake.

Placing your cup down to look back at him, a grimace of annoyance decorated your lips. “You haven’t learnt anything have you?” You leaned over the table, feeling the lifting wood poking your ribcage. “My grandma always used to say: If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans.“

“God can laugh but I still have my plans. Now it’s up to you if you slip out of his grasp and move in with me. I’ll figure out how to make it different eventually. I’ll be waiting for you.” His eyes betrayed the harsh tone in his voice but Mark wanted it to be clear that he’d do anything to cater to you. Even if it meant that you’d break his heart from time to time.

Mark looked outside the window, sand from the beach danced across the platform entrance. Like Donghyuck, he couldn’t bear being in your presence now. Accidentally bumping into the table while he stands, Mark makes way towards the door, not before throwing you one last glance.

However you weren’t too keen on putting others over yourself.

“Donghyuck is my husband.” You spat, back angrily hitting the cold plastic booth backrest. In his desperate agony, he fumbled out the door with those same words ringing as loudly as the entrance bell.

The mentioned man had gotten out not long after Mark had left, questioning his whereabouts but dismissed by you asking him to walk along the shoreline while you all waited for Mark’s train to arrive.

After speaking with Mark in which he took refuge in the platform benches, it allowed for both you and Hyuck to take the opportunity to bask in the presence of each other.

What was there to say? Any argument and reproach had been screamed last night, enough to hurt everyone involved but mainly him.

For someone that wanted to avoid a horrible start of a new age, you had failed and all that was left was the mixture of resentment and anger towards the two men in your current life.

Hyuck similar to you, shared those sentiments with the exception he wasn’t too angry. Rather than so he was sad. Sad at the fact that his best friend, his brother, could've done that to him. To smile and laugh under his roof while fucking his wife and not feeling guilt whatsoever. In fact the bastard gloated as if you had chosen him instead.

While he had no room to judge, he still had the right to feel horrible about this now confirmed betrayal. He wondered if you felt this pain when you found out. You had expressed your anger through destroying the house and becoming cold towards him until Mark showed up but that was about it. He never had the chance to see you cry about what he had done and he believes he never will.

You did cry of course. Despite the way you treated him and tossed him around, ignoring his cries for help, you still loved him. You loved how attentive and kind he was. You loved that he stuck by your side after your lashings and the nostalgia of how sweet he was when pursuing you. So to realize that there was a possibility of him doing all that for someone else broke you.

Why would he confess profound love until his final breath just to go on and have a fling with the next girl that gave him attention while you’re gone? Well it was easy and while he started telling you last night, you needed more.

Stopping in your tracks, feet away from the platform and people; you turn to the ocean, watching the increased height of the crashing waves. Their splashing kisses your skin and the wind makes your hair dance across your face.

When noticing, Hyuck turns his body to you, tucking away the strands behind your ear. His warm hand lingered for a few seconds on your cold damp cheek, staring with sorrow embedded into his pupils. It’s fascinating how often your bodies contradict each other. He didn’t say anything, all he did was look at you, eyes flickering across your stoic face. Many things crossed your mind but your face never showed it.

Up until he dropped his hand and stood beside you to be consumed in the whirlwinds of today’s weather; your voice interrupted his silence. No thoughts in his head but now the melody of your voice swirled around in his cranium.

“Do you think in another universe we could’ve been happy together?”

You didn’t turn but he does, the confusion on his face easing when the question washes over him.

“Perhaps when we learn to fix our mistakes and flaws.” “What flaws? Yours?” “Right.”

He laughs exhaustedly. In this universe or any other, he didn’t believe you’ll ever be able to accept that you’ve also fucked up. It was notable that you were able to admit you and Mark had been fucking but even that you blamed on him. He wouldn’t complain, there’s no doubt that you did it out of spite but regardless he knew what he was talking about.

You couldn’t wrap your head around last night’s information. Maybe because your affair consisted of pure carnal desire but you couldn’t understand how Donghyuck didn’t take that approach with the catering girl.

“W-why her?..”

There was no intention for your words to come out shaky. What you feared was your walls starting to crack at this information. On his part, Hyuck didn’t want to speak much anymore. He knew if he told you more, you’d be upset and he feared you’d throw a fit again but your insistence by holding onto his arms and hesitating to pull him close was enough.

Glancing at you with worry, he sighs. His head drops and turns to the sea hoping it could swallow him. “My brother died a week before and you left, y/n. You left me for three months when I needed you most and you barely answered any of my calls. And I know you didn’t just leave for work, I know you didn’t want to deal with me but she did.”

Your world came crashing down on you. He was right, you did leave to not deal with his emotions to get away from him and to avoid the feeling of grief all over again. When his parents had come over to tell him the news it reminded you too much of your mother’s death. Sad part is that when you came back he too had replaced you with another woman the same way your father did with your mom.

At the end of the day your plan had backfired on you. You didn’t know how to comfort him nor wanted to, dealing with the strong emotions of others was never your thing. But till this day you’re paying the consequences as he is.

“She listened and comforted me. I guess I confused it with love because the second you came back all that flooded my mind was you regardless that you left me or all the times you called me useless for not doing things your way. You could add that to the reasons. She was nice, if I made a mistake she wouldn’t berate me and instead helped me with it. Why did you change, y/n? You were so sweet and suddenly you just… dropped the act.”

To hear it come from his mouth crushed your heart. To an extent you knew your actions would have led to this outcome but you always put the blame on him.

You shrug, throwing him a quick glance. “I’ve always been like this, Hyuck.”

“No, the girl I fell in love with was sweet and playful. You became mean and cold after we got married.”

“You changed so much too. Once you started getting promotions you became such a pompous ass. Constantly staying out for meetings till 2 AM, always smelling like alcohol, and lessening the help at home. Then after the affair you gave up so fast in trying to amend anything that you became worse and that’s when the constant fighting began.”

He couldn’t forget of course. He still recalls you shredding to pieces the book of poems he wrote to you and binded. He felt his heart go when you had done that; watching his hard work and feelings just thrown away over a petty argument of who would walk the dog next. Sad to say when those poems were destroyed the dog went out next. Every fruit of your love withered little by little.

Donghyuck took refuge in his job to stay away from you. Despite how in pain he was, he still had hope things would get better, that maybe you’d forget and try to work it out again. By the time Mark had arrived, that hope had died out and he was tired of the cycle that he just mimicked your way of treating him.

Nevertheless in the past months that you changed how you treated him, it blossomed again. Of course, good things never last and when his suspicions kept being thrown at his face, he understood what life had brought upon him.

He hums as a response, sighing loudly in the process. “I don’t think we can be happy any time soon but at least this is making us actually talk about it now.” His deep voice adds, turning to you to get a sweet answer but he was simply met with a cheeky smile and: “So we’re even now?”

He laughs finding it unbelievable. No apology or anything of the sort. Some things won't change too fast but regardless his sentiment was similar. “Yeah. We’re even.”

A relieved smile spreads on your face, nodding in agreement. “Till death do us apart.” No matter how much you two confess your disdain for each other, you’ll always be together. Call it sadomasochism or exhausting familiarity but you and your husband are sticking together.

All these years you were waiting for Donghyuck’s downfall and having him confess it has been happening all along had alleviated that weight on your shoulders. You had done it and he was paying for hurting you. Some sentiments never change but even with that information, you aren’t satisfied. What you two had was ruined and everyone involved ended up losing.

The locomotive was louder than expected. In addition the conductors and ticketing people were heard even from where you two stood. This was it, Mark’s time was over with you two.

Cocking his head for you to follow him; with hooked arms, the both of you make way to the bench where Mark sits nervously. His legs shake from either the cold or wondering if you’ll still leave with him. Even now that he sees how close and happy you and Hyuck look together, he’s willing to convince himself it’s another front.

“Got everything ready?” Hyuck calls out for his friend. Mark stands from his spot, nodding as he releases the smoke of his millionth cigarette. “Yeah, yeah. Just–” He lifts the stick between his fingers. “Can’t have one in there.” Mark chuckles, his vision removing itself from you two.

“I’ll call you guys when I get to the apartment. Taeyong and mom are going to help me get the paintings out. Do you want me to do anything before I leave the key?” It was mostly directed at Donghyuck, that sliver of hope clinging tightly. You were the one to speak instead.

“Maybe water the plants if they’re not dead yet.”

In recollection of what you two did together, Mark had remembered the plant you two helped sprout. The last time he paid attention to it, it was bright and green. Now he imagines it dull and dead.

He nods with a tight lipped smile, inhaling from the warm cigarette butt. Silences lingered momentarily but Hyuck was the one to cut through it. “We’ll see you for your housewarming, alright?” Mark nods, standing when you two stopped clinging to each other.

“Take care, okay?” “Okay.”

The hoarseness in his voice threatened him the longer he clung to Donghyuck. This was it for the two of them and he had thrown it out for lust. His only rock was leaving him. When it came to you, the hug wasn’t tight enough, something in his heart told him that you’ll be joining him soon.

But little by little as you and Donghyuck make way down the steps and out the platform, he wonders how much longer till you run back inside to get your ticket.

His hope had dwindled slowly back at the diner when you had cruelly crushed his expectations. Up until now that flame was left but not seeing even your locks had turned it off. All that is left is the delusional idea that you’d actually fall through with the plans he made for the both of you. Chances fell slim the closer last call came around.

There was no trace of you or Hyuck outside the station, all there left was the cold winter with the addition of families or couples enjoying themselves oblivious to his pain dispersing through his entire body.

His teeth shattered while he shivered, the cigarette in between his lips doing nothing for comfort or warmth; Mark was alone and cold. The only source of physicality came from the ticket staff to let him know this was the last call before the train left. He nodded, giving one last look around, feeling his face scrunch up after ridding of his cigarette.

The cold bit him harshly, tears smeared his face holding back his sobs now that reality had settled. His cold hands wiped away the boiling streams that burnt his cheeks but it only made his skin ache more. He didn’t care if people could see his sorrow painted on his face. All he has now are memories, paintings, and pictures.

He will never see you two again.

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