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page150 · 3 years

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Not A Friend - (Sister to Oscar "Spooky" and César Díaz)

Request: "i was wondering if u could do a fic where oscar and cesar have a teen sister and she’s sexually assaulted and tells oscar??"

Pronouns: She/Her

Word Count: 3181

Warnings: Sexual Assault, Guns, Cursing

A/N: I usually don't do a author's note before the imagine, but this is a sensitive topic so if this might be triggering please click away.

Y/N - Your Name f/c - favorite color

Y/N sat quietly in her room, reading a book, illuminated by a white lamp sitting on her dresser.

Outside her brother, Oscar laughed with some men and her other brother, César had left a while ago on another adventure with his friends, leaving Y/N by herself in her room. Placing the book down, she moved the curtains away from her window. She looked at the gathering of Santos socializing in the backyard. Red solo cups in hand, dancing and eating. She remembered how Oscar had let her help decorate the backyard for the party only to be later excluded from it. Looking at him laughing with a with his arm around someone she betted that he had forgotten that she was inside.

She had gotten used to being forgotten and treated differently by people. Ever since she was born her brothers didn’t know what to do with her. Oscar had never expected to have to raise a brother by himself and especially not a sister. Even though she was only a year younger than César, Oscar's idea of keeping her safe was keeping her hidden.

She was only allowed to go straight to school then straight home, never alone either. If César or Monse weren’t going to a place neither was Y/N and that’s how it always was. She was especially not allowed to hang out with any of Oscar's friends, making life extremely lonely.

Glancing at a photo that was taped next to the window, she smiled at herself situated between Jasmine and Monse with Jamal, Ruby and César in the back. César’s friends were nice, but they were his friends not hers. He was the one invited to all their parties. He was the one they had tried to save, not her.

This left school to be the only place Y/N could socialize, but no one wanted to be friends with a girl from a gang. She was labeled dangerous before anything else, leaving her by herself. Always forgotten, and always alone.

That night she went to sleep feeling sorry for herself and woke up the same way. It continued the next few days until one day when while sitting in her algebra class, a new student was introduced. He was placed next to her and, ignoring the strange looks the class gave to him, he introduced himself.

“I’m Luke. Can I sit here?”

Y/N looked up at the blond haired boy. Her table partner had moved schools a few months ago and no one bothered to sit with her since. He looked nice, he had a nice smile and it made her want to lower her guard slightly, “Yeah, you can sit here.”

Luke sat next to her and immediately tried to start a conversation. He talked about how he moved from Florida. She noticed, as they talked more, how similar they were. They both had interesting families. He had two brothers, she had two brothers and they both lived near each other.

Y/N found herself laughing more than usual at his jokes. This led to the teacher having to stop class multiple times to scold them. Y/N never had a connection to someone like this, especially not on the first day. At lunch Luke went to sit with with her and -

“Who’s this?” César asked, suddenly sitting down at the lunch table next to his sister and wrapping an arm around her. Jamal, Ruby, and Monse also sat down. The table that previously consisted of two people quickly turned to six. Other kids nearby, eyed the two “dangerous” siblings sitting together.

Y/N rolled her eyes at the unexpected attention that was now forming. “This is Luke, he’s new.”

“Lukeee,” César trailed, “I’m Y/N’s older brother-”

“By a few months,” Y/N butted in.

“Whatever, I’m César, these are my friends Jamal, Ruby and my girl Monse.”

Monse laughed, “I’m not your girl.”

“Not yet,” César winked.

Y/N sighed and threw César’s arm off her. She turned to Elliot and apologized.

“Sorry for them.”

“No they’re cool,” Luke grinned. “Any friend of mine is my friend as well.”

Y/N raised her eyebrows, “We’re friends now? It’s only been a day.”

“Of course, you’re cool.”

With the compliment Y/N cheeks turned red. As childish as it was, having an established friendship with someone made her feel nice.

“This must be how César and Oscar feel all the time.” She thought.

“I don’t know if Oscar will like you having a friend that is a boy.” Ruby remarked. “No offense, Luke.”

“None taken.”

“Oscar doesn’t like anyone anyways.” Monse muttered, taking a bite into her sandwich.

“Don’t worry” Luke smiled, “I’m one of the good guys.”

“That’s what they all say,” Jamal said suspiciously. He leaned in close to Luke’s face and gave him some crazy faces.

“Okay, great talk guys,” Y/N said sarcastically, “I would love to chat with you more but lunch is about to end and I have to show Luke where his next class is. I’ll see you later.”

“Yeah I have to go, but it was nice meeting you guys.” Luke stated, before he was dragged away by Y/N.

The next few weeks Y/N spent all her time with Luke. He sat next to her in the classes they shared, they talked at lunch and while walking home after school. They even stayed up at night so they could talk on the phone. She found herself smiling every time he talked to her. Every time he offered to carry her books. He was just so nice.

One Friday afternoon, Luke came running up to Y/N, putting her items in her backpack after her last class. He put his hands around her eyes, trying to hold back his laughter.

“Guess who?”

“Mrs. Kurt, I told you we can't see each other here.” Y/N whispered.

Luke removed his hands and his face went white. Y/N turned around and started crying with laughter. She had to sit down, her face turning bright red as she continued to laugh, gasping for air.

“I don’t even want to think about you dating my mom.” He trembled, before returning to his cheerful self. “Stop laughing, I have important news. There’s a party tonight and I was wondering if you wanted to come with me.”

Y/N stopped laughing and thought about it before responding. “I don’t know. I don’t think Oscar would want me to. You know how he is about stuff like that.”

Luke smiled and picked her backpack off the floor. He then put out his hand and helped Y/N to her feet.

“Which is why César and his friends already said they are coming too. Oscar doesn’t have to know you're going as my date.”

“Your date?”

“If you want to be. I want you to be my date.”

Y/N smiled, a pink blush covering her cheeks. “I can be your date.”

“Great,” He took her hand and began to lead her out of the classroom. “It’s going to be amazing, don't worry.”

That night Y/N drank water out of a red solo cup, while sitting on the couch of a kid she had never met before. This time she was the one laughing and partying. Colors flashed around the room as more and more kids came into the house. The air was foggy with smoke and smelt like a mash of perfumes and colognes. Y/N nodded her head to the music enjoying the energy in the room.

To her surprise Luke pulled her up to dance with him. She giggled feeling his hands go around her waist. She put her arms around his neck just like she saw in the movies. Rap was blasting out of speakers placed on the ground. Somewhere someone joked about getting a noise compliment to which the crowd began shouting the rap lyrics louder. Taunting the idea, almost hoping for it so the party could gain extra excitement. Y/N shouted along with them in bliss. Ignoring the past fear she had felt once she noticed César had left. Ignoring the looks she had gotten when she first walked in the party. Ignoring how Luke had moved his hands past the dip in her back...

When she felt his hands squeeze her butt she whispered for him to stop which he did, but she still felt weird. A sinking feeling sat in her gut that this was a mistake. Suddenly the small action made the party feel like too much now. She could smell the stink of alcohol on Luke’s breath and weirdly on herself as well. How did she get drunk?

Y/N moved from Luke to where she had placed her cup. Now she could see scribbled on with a black sharpie, someone else’s name. She must have grabbed the wrong cup sometime during the party. Swaying slightly, she moved back toward Luke.

“I need to go home,” She hiccuped. “I drank someone's drink.”

In the darkness she didn’t see Luke’s small smile. “Wow, I’m sorry. Let’s get you home.”

The two exited the party and began to walk home. Y/N felt more tipsy as she walked, eventually having to lean on the blond boy. She didn’t feel really drunk, she could still tell what was happening, it was just her body felt a little out of balance. Luke seemed the same way, but before they reached Y/N house he grabbed her hips. The sudden movement left her in shock.

“You looked really nice tonight, babe.” He said, pulling her into a kiss as he ran his hands on her back, slowly moving lower onto her butt, then up to her breasts.

Immediately Y/N pushed Luke off of her, moving to wrap her arms around herself. “What the hell? I’m a Santo, pull that shit again and it's over” She yelled, backing away from Luke.

“Like you would, I’m the only one who cares enough to pay attention to you. Do you really think anyone else wants to be around you? I’ll do whatever I want. You would be an idiot to lose me.” He fumed.

Y/N froze. Luke had never acted like that before. He couldn’t truly mean what he was saying. She ran into her house and locked the door behind her. She waited a few minutes to check that he had left, which he did.

After her shower she convinced herself that Luke must have been really drunk. That’s why he acted that way, but on Monday he proved that that was not the case.

At the beginning of algebra it started off okay. Luke kept his eyes on the board and focused on his work. It was okay up to the point where he started rubbing on Y/N's leg. She told him to stop but he ignored her. First rubbing small circles on her knee. Then moving up to her thigh moving closer and closer upwards. No matter how many times she moved his hand he kept putting it back. Eventually she had to stay quiet out of fear of distracting the class, but he kept going. She begged silently for it to stop. Suddenly feeling powerless as he continued to do as he pleased for more days.

At lunch even though Luke continued to joke with César she started to go silent. It was a constant internal battle. If she pushed Luke away more, it would cause her to lose her only friend. If she didn’t she would continue to feel uncomfortable. She told herself it would stop eventually, that things would go back to normal, but they didn’t.

As more days went by Luke tried to do more things. The more he tried to do the quieter Y/N got. But luckily César began to notice. He noticed that Y/N wanted him to sit between her and Luke more. How she stopped laughing at his jokes and how Luke changed his tone when talking to her. It wasn’t always playful like it used to be.

Even though César wasn’t really close to his sister he acknowledged that they had to look out for each other. Y/N had been the one to get Oscar to let him back in the house many times. She looked out for him, and he had to look out for her.

Which is why when César and Monse accidentally walked in on Luke kissing her in an empty classroom while she tried to push him off, he freaked out.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” He shouted, pulling Luke off of her and close to his face by the collar of his shirt. “I'm Lil’ Spooky I’ll have your face in the dirt if you do that shit again.”

“César, stop what are you doing here. You’re going to hurt him.” Y/N yelled. Monse gently pulled her away from Luke, but she pushed Monse back.

César punched Luke in the eye and he fell down, crumbling into a fetal position. César continued to kick him in the stomach until Y/N pulled him away.

“You’re hurting him! You can’t do this here! César stop please!”

César turned and grabbed Y/N's arm. He led her out of the classroom and out of the school with Monse trailing after them. Y/N’s items in hand.

“I can’t believe he was on you like that. Shit, Y/N. Wait, don't cry, don’t cry, it's okay.”

Y/N hadn’t realized she was crying until he said that. Tears were falling rapidly down her cheeks. She choked back sobs, trying to keep herself somewhat together.

She was thankful for César stopping it, but afraid for what would happen next. Once they reached their house César guided her up the stairs and inside where Oscar was smoking a cigarette at the dinner table. Hearing the door burst open and crying he instantly got up. He reached for his gun, but seeing that it was his siblings he stopped.

“Shit, what the hell happened César. Why is she crying?”

“Tell him,” César said softly. Monse ran in and went to Y/N’s side pulling her into a hug.

“Tell me what. Why are you crying?”

“He 's not mad at you hermana. Él va a ayudar.”

Y/N sniffled and buried herself into Monse’s shoulder. Trying to hide her embarrassment she whispered, “My friend at school was touching me in a weird way, Oscar. He wouldn’t stop. I told him to stop, though. I did. Please, don’t be mad at me.”

“We’re not mad at you and he’s not a friend anymore, Y/N. That should’ve never happened to you.” Monse murmured.

The room went silent. Monse still slowly rubbed Y/N’s back and César stood tense. Oscar looked from César to Y/N.

“César, do you think he left school yet?”

“Uh yeah, school ended right after I pulled her out.”

“Come on,” Oscar grabbed his gun and began to walk out the door, César following after. Y/N ran after Oscar begging for him to stop.

“Don’t Oscar, don’t hurt hm. He’s my only friend. He’s a kid, it was just a mistake.”

“No no!” He shouted. Oscar turned and placed his hands on Y/N’s shoulder’s. Looking into her teary eyes.

“It’s not your fault. It’s never your fault hermana. My job is to keep you safe. I've failed at a lot of things, but I refuse to fail at that again. Get in the house and rest. He just needs to be taught a lesson. Stay with Monse. Te amo como una hija bebé espeluznante.”

He left with César, leaving Y/N on the lawn. Monse guided her back into the house. She remembered what her dad did whenever she was going through a lot. She treated Y/N the same way. Reassuring her that it will be okay. That it wasn’t her fault.

César and Oscar didn’t come back until later that night.

“We got you this,” Oscar muttered, walking into the house and tossing a stuffed bear to Y/N. “We saw the idea online.” It was a f/c bear with a heart on it that said ‘Te Quiero’ with little messages César and Oscar wrote on the back. There weren't a lot, but the few ones there were were heartfelt.

“Thank you, I love it” Y/N smiled, holding the bear close. Her eyes were still slightly red from crying.

“And pizza,” César quietly cheered. On his face was a bandage, but he moved his face so Y/N couldn’t see it. “Monse do you want to spend the night?”

Monse looked at Y/N, “Yeah I already have clothes here so I’ll stay,”

She picked up a slice of pizza. “Soo, what did you guys do?”

“We took care of it,” Oscar said, sitting on the couch next to Y/N. “He won’t mess with you again. If I didn’t have a reputation I would’ve reported it.” He lowered his voice. “You can always go to us Y/N, we’re going to protect you. If that cabrón messes with you again I’m coming for him. ”

“I know,” Y/N mumbled. “I just wanted a friend, how dumb is that.”

“You can always hang out with us,” Monse added, “We’re your friends. We love having you around.”

Y/N sighed, “I mean my own friend. I love you guys too, but it gets so lonely. No one at school wants to be near me. Soy un marginado.”

The room went silent again. Before Monse spoke up, “You know you’re really smart Y/N. There’s a school in BrentWood that might offer you a scholarship to go there. I know you could pass the entrance exam. ”

“I could get a job for the tuition,” César added, rising from his seat at the dinner table. “Oscar what do you think? You’ve been making more money lately. It would keep her safe. She is really smart.”

Oscar looked at the ceiling, a good sign that he was thinking about the idea. Y/N kept her mouth shut, trying not to get too excited.

“How would she get there?”

“It’s a long bus ride,” Monse remarked, “But it’s safe. Only a bunch of rich kids. Most of them will be nice to you, Y/N. You’re smart, you’re funny, and you’re strong. Not a lot of them are like that there. No one will know who you're related to. I can get my mom to help get you in.”

César, Monse, and Y/N looked at Oscar. He took a deep breath and released it. Pulling a cigarette out his pocket, he lit it. Breathing deep he puffed out the smoke.

“I failed you today as a hermano, if I can keep you safe I will. I’ll work on getting you there.”

Y/N smiled and hugged Oscar, feeling César join as well.

“Thank you Oscar. Thank you Cesar. Thank you Monse. I love you.”

“Yeah, yeah” Oscar grinned. “Get off me I’m going to bed. I think I’ll go to the beach tomorrow. Want to come?”

“Yes!”

Author's Note: My DMs are always open to anyone who needs it. I am also on twitter to anyone who wants to talk @/thepage150. Requests are open. You are important. You are valued. You are loved. Have a wonderful day ~c'k

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apparentlyaswarmofbees · 3 years

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Can I have headcanons for the brothers with an Mc who switches languages whenever they’re angry or arguing with someone?

I live in a Asian-Hispanic household and the amount of times I’ve switched languages whenever I’m arguing with my family is uncountable.

I am im this ask and I don't like it lololololol

I am fluent in two lenguages and know many words of other lenguages, my communication is a MESS, I am speaking portuguese but then suddenly english comes out and I say sorry for that in korean, then because my brother likes to tease me with japanese terms I end up answering it back in japanese, it's m e s s y.

I'll make this into...

Switching Leguages As a Bi/Multilingual ft. The Seven Demon Brothers

Warning: Uncensored Swearing

Lucifer

That shitty smile of his, those disgusting eyebrows that raise up as he pointedly looks at you, his entire fucking existence as he teases you for fubbling one word in your sentence with another lenguage.

It's not easy knowing more than one lenguage, you're basically a newborn who just learned to talk sometimes and Lucifer is having a great fucking time with it.

Thankfully when he has better things to do than help you dig your own grave, he let's any fubbling go unnoticed, specially if you're arguing, at those moments he may, in fact, switch lenguages entirely to match yours, which would be a pretty amusing sight if not for the fact that the two of you arguing is one of the most scary things to ever witness in life-

Speak in another lenguage while he's tired and you will make him purposefully say things like 'stop fooling around' in the same lenguage, it's pretty adorable 🤭

Mammon

He knows quite a few lenguages himself (it's usefull for scammig people) so yes he is going to tease you about it.

And then he will proceed to fubble his own words with another lenguage right after.

Seriously have pity on this man because everytime you speak one single word in another lenguage that he also knows his brain will automatically change into that lenguage and now he has no idea what the fuck he's even trying to say.

He finds it adorable if you become a lenguage switching mess when happy or excited, but you bet he's terrified out of his damn life if you do so when angry, like seriously, he is very close to shitting his pants.

Leviathan

Hoh boy he had so many mixed feelings the first time you spoke in another lenguage, his brain immediatelly shut down and he refused to accept that you could speak in a lenguage he did not understand and it was so cool he was so jealous and terrified out of his mind that if you got any cooler than this you would definetelly leave him at some point because compared to you he was less than nothing-

He secretly tries learning said lenguage so he could understand some of your mumbles, the curses under your breath and the fubbles here and there with certain words.

You know when a kid is learning new words at school and they come home and say said word to their parents or to someone else like 'I learned how to say this!' with so much pride and confidence? That's Levi to you at any given oportunity.

Also terrified when you switch lenguages while angry.

Satan

He will outlenguage you.

You know when you are trying to remember one word in a lenguage but you can only remember it in another lenguage so you end up saying it in that another lenguage and people around you look at you weirdly? Well, with Satan that doesn't last for long because now he is speaking in that lenguage and he uses such an unnecessary ammount of ☆°.•fancy•.°☆ words that you can't understand shit that he's saying even though you are most likelly fluent in said lenguage.

I can't blame you if you choose to kick him where the sun doesn't shine because although I know how much it hurts he kind of was asking for it-

And oh b o y anyone would rather be dead than deal with both you and Satan arguing in another lenguage.

Expect to hear Satan say 'meow' in like, 100 different lenguages at some point.

Asmodeus

Okay but if there is one thing that is hot as fuck is Asmo dirty talking in different lenguages, he sure has one hell of a flexible tongue.

Now that that is out there, of course he gets excited to hear you switch lenguages, and of course he will start speaking some unholy things in said lenguage most likelly right into your ear when you least expect it like the first thing he tells you in the morning at the table while you're eating breakfast.

And sometimes it's not even just to you, sometimes he will just say it out loud and everyone is suddenly choking.

Don't expect him to be anything other than extremelly attracted to you the moment you switch lenguages while angry unless it's actually something serious.

Beelzebub

You have gained +10 points of respect from Beelzebub

This man is a big baby but his twin is Belphegor so you can't seriously expect him to not be at least a bit of a tease, so he will definetelly be amused by your lenguage rollercoaster and he will definetelly point them out from time to time.

You could say there is no way you would get angry at this baby but he definetelly needs some scolding sometimes and he will be absolutelly unsettled by any lenguage switch you do while at it.

Yes you guys will manage to spend at least a full minute saying the same word to each other in another lenguage because neither of you are really sure what is the correct pronunciation

Belphegor

Speak one word in another lenguage on accident while around this cow and it will be your nickname for the rest of the week.

The more words you switch within said week the longer and the more bizarre the nickname becomes as he puts all said words together into a single one. He even mimics your accent.

He's definetelly too lazy to keep up with your rambling in a whole different lenguage while angry, and though he understands and pays attention he would definetelly rather not have to deal with switching lenguages.

Also you know those very offensive swear words every lenguage has? He definetelly uses them on Lucifer.

#in this headcanon Lucifer Satan and Belphie have the most knowledge in other lenguages #Belphie absorves knowledge like osmosis so he knows basically the same ammount as Satan #Lucifer knows a little bit less #Mammon Asmo and Beel are somewhat knowledgeable #Asmo coming in first because he definetelly interacts with lot's of different people followed by Mammon and then Beel #Levi has less knowledge because he won't be interested in a lenguage if the anime/game with it isn't interesting #but he's a damn fast learner like wow #both Belphie and Mammon know the words but they cannot for the life of them understand the grammar #Satan Beel and Asmo are the ones more inclined to being intrigued by the culture linked to lenguages #Satan definetelly focuses more on social interaction in a sociology level #Asmo definetelly also focuses on social interactions but more in a relationships kind of level #Beel is more intrigued by both the food AND the morals of each community he learns a lot from different perspectives #Lucifer is more on the 'I know this lenguage for work/professional purposes'#though Belphie takes interest in culture he actually most likely finds the lenguage barrier a pain in the ass #obey me #obey me!#obey me! shall we date?#obey me shall we date #obey me headcanons #obey me scenarios #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor

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ak8shi · 4 years

Text

FWB HQ Boys: In which you beat the player at his own game!

warnings: Time skip spoilers, mentions of sex(all characters are 18+), alcohol, stupid people in love

a/n: ahh I’m sorry I’ve been a little MIA!!! But I’m back with this pls enjoy ! I think the fandom really make germaphobia his only personality trait sometimes which makes me sad because I think he’s actually a quirky/classy dude and very functional in social situations,, I hate to say it but ya’ll would get played by him… sorry.

━Sakusa Kiyoomi

Some of you may be like ???? Omi fucks around ?? how ?? BUT he definitely does in his own way

He probably doesn’t do much in high school to be honest, he’s mostly focused on improving as a volleyball player and achieving his goals

Once he reaches pro level though,,, it’s a different story lmfao

I can see him being picky as hell about his hookups, but just because he’s a bit of a germaphobe doesn’t mean he doesn’t feel attraction or doesn’t have needs…

….He’s so hot too… girl

His hook-ups are always taken seriously though… like he’s the type that feels like he has a professional image to upkeep, so he always arranges things beforehand; he’s definitely not messy about it and sets clear boundaries

I think what makes him kind of a player is how standoffish he can be…and he doesn’t really give anyone a chance because he doesn’t think they what it takes to deal with his lifestyle lmao

He’s just like, its easier to call the uber right after, get into the shower, and wait until he can hear the front door of his apartment shut I’m screamingg

Sakusa also isn’t one to kiss and tell, even with the boys… he doesn’t think its tasteful and would rather not have Atsumu up his ass about his flings

ANYWAYS,, let’s get into this, so you know Atsumu through mutual friends and met during college, and the two of you just instantly clicked since you also were a part of the same sports medicine program as him

Atsumu signed with MSBY and you were so happy for him, but you were bummed because you were busy with PT graduate school and couldn’t really attend any of his games

A year passed and you found yourself texting Tsumu to see if he could meet up and grab coffee since you were on winter break!!

You: hey I’m back in town wanna grab coffee sometime?

Him: who is this

You: I see you haven’t changed ❤️

LMFAO, so you catch up with Atsumu and he talks about his new career and his teammates, he seems so happy :(( we love to see that!!

He invites you to MSBY’s game the following weekend, and you’re pumped to go!! Tsumu got you great seats, and he meets you before warmups to make sure you’re okay finding your way around

Atsumu: don’t take yer eyes off me <3

You:

He’s so…

You’re enjoying the match and you even go to grab Onigiri from Osamu’s stand, but you can’t seem to look away from number 15 on Atsumu’s team

He’s .., scrumptious to say the least 🥴

Like he’s so composed and calculated on the court, and you find it so funny how he rolls his eyes whenever Tsumu says something to him and how Tsumu gets so heated about it 💀

The match ends and you go down to meet Atsumu near the lockers, showing the security your family/friend pass 😌

You walk through the halls trying to locate the setter, but you can’t seem to figure out where he is

The only person in the hall is the tall, dark haired man that caught your eye earlier; he is already walking towards the exit with a mask covering his face, his duffel bag slung over his shoulder, sweats embroidered with “Sakusa” adorning his body we’re all looking..... respectfully

He’s truly so intimidating but you’re like….highkey lost… so you don’t really have another option

You catch up with him, poking his shoulder gently; he turns around and his attention on you is almost STARTLING.. like his eyes are SO dark

Him: can I help you

You: sir… if you don’t rail me, I’m gonna have to intervene‼️😈😹

After getting over your initial shock, you hear multiple footsteps rumbling down the hallway towards the both of you

Sakusa lets out an annoyed sigh, muttering about how he has to go, but before he can escape you hear Atsumu’s loud voice LMFAO

“OMIIII, where are you goin’? Its team karaoke night remember?”

Tsumu sees you and slings an arm around your shoulders, “Oh-? So I see you’ve met our outside hitter Omi?”

You glance over at Sakusa, his expressionless eyes glued to your face, then slowly trailing down to analyze the way Atsumu casually has you tucked under his arm

Atsumu nudges him, and he grumbles that he’ll meet them after changing at home before walking off in the direction of the private parking garage

You meet the rest of the MSBY boys in the uber, and find them super friendly and welcoming; Bokuto and Hinata buy the first round of drinks at the karaoke bar, but you only have one because you have work to finish the next day WE STAN

Atsumu already has a pink glow setting into his cheeks when you see the boys turn their attention to Sakusa walking through the front door, looking as handsome as ever in his dress pants and fitted white t shirt

They all shout out incoherent hello’s, and he takes the only open seat next to you with a glass of gin and tonic in his hand he smells so good god

You’re unsure what comes over you, but you find yourself turning towards him, and you just start asking him about himself and his career, and surprisingly he’s very polite and much more animated than you previously thought

His voice is like…so alluring and he never looks away from you when you talk, its like he’s absorbing every word

Meanwhile, Atsumu is stumbling over the stage with Bokuto belting Love by Keisha Cole LMFAOO😭

Tsumu kind of ‘warned’ you in the car ride over that Sakusa was a germaphobe, but you know that Atsumu tends to invade people’s personal space sometimes and it probably wasn’t as dramatic as he made it out to be

However, you weren’t expecting the outside hitter to lean over from his seat after checking the time on his phone, whispering in your ear, asking you if you wanted to meet him at his place later than night WHEW

Girl I would be sweating… and you say yes ofc because who’s going to pass up this type of opportunity-

He gives you a charming smile and is like,, okay cool, I’ll see you later then 😊 I’m dead

Ya’ll exchange phone numbers and he’s like if you need any help with my idiot teammates let me know before he takes off

You don’t tell Tsumu about your little… entanglement plans dsnjaknda but honestly he wouldn’t even remember based on the way he’s slumped against you in the uber he owes you big time

You get home after dropping off Tsumu at Osamu’s, and operation dick appointment with the professional volleyball player is put into action 😈

He sends an uber over to get you ladies do not settle for less please, and you’re BIG nervous but in a good way as in you know this dick is about to be bomb af

SO you’re standing in front of his apartment door, and when he opens it, he’s still in the clothes he wore to the bar and its like 1 am he’s so powerful

Um I feel like he would get straight to it honestly, probably starts with a little convo on the couch and then…

YOU WEREN’T AWARE HE WAS SO DIRTY,,, it was SO good too like after getting home that night you’re going through a crisis… like you had so much chemistry together for having just met, and you wonder if he feels the same way🥺

You caught yourself in sleepless states some nights, kept awake by the thoughts of the way his hands felt against your skin, the way his five o’clock shadow gently rubbed against your face when you kissed, and how he would hold you(only after a thorough shower together of course)

As it happens more and more, he lets you into his life little by little, and you notice and remember small facts about him and he often remembers a lot of the things you tell him about you, its really enjoyable for both of you

Its weirdly domestic to a point but that’s why its so good for both of you???it adds a bit of spice ??

Sakusa: can you come over tonight

You: sorry the retainer is in already <3 no dick sucking for me tonight <3

Him: I bought pastries from that cafe you like

You: say less✈️ I’m coming💃

AND he HAS jokes okay, like he’s funny as hell and very witty when his true self comes out; but he’s also a HUGE tease and he’ll say something completely straight-faced that someone else might take offense to like “you look ugly,” but you just know he’s kidding from being around him long enough and from seeing the little glint in his dark eyes

It becomes a routine thing while you’re home honestly, and you try your best to hide it from Atsumu because you just KNOW you would never hear the end of it; for all he knows, you met him that one time at the bar and that was that

Everything is going smoothly until you slip up at one of their games

You were sitting in the waiting area with the team (mostly talking to Atsumu), when he just says something that makes your short circuit

Atsumu: what kind of animal do ya think omi would be? An octopus maybe?

You: yeah I mean with those flexible wrists it makes sense

Atsumu: what the fawk🤠

He’s like… how do you even know about his flexible wrists IT TOOK ME 6 MONTHS TO GET TO THAT STAGE WITH HIM-

Oops, lmfao so you kind of tell him about everything and he’s literally shocked for you, mostly because he doesn’t want you to get hurt :(

Atsumu: So I see he’s just sleeping with ANYONE anyone

LMAO noo he definitely thinks you’re too good for him and he kind of lectures you, telling you that he had a hunch that he messes around with girls like that, but also you’re an adult and you can take care of yourself, and it isn’t like it’s a serious thing!!

Meanwhile, Omi is like going through a bit of a crisis all alone because everything around him reminds him of you or something you said when you were together

He got with people who were compatible sexually often, but he never had the urge to have them stay over after the deed; he usually immediately called them an uber and wouldn’t speak to them again

He found himself thinking about seeing you in the stands at his games, wishing you were there to cheer for him only, and he adored the way you respected his boundaries unlike many of his hookups

Atsumu probably notices something is off with him at practice

Atsumu: hey…if ya ever want to talk about somethin’-

Sakusa: no

Girl… he doesn’t disclose any of this to anyone

Its nearing the end of your break, and you head over to sakusa’s for probably the last time before you go back to school

You’re kind of at the point where you don’t think anything will happen and you know you shouldn’t get your hopes up, and it goes how it usually goes? Except he kind of hugs you goodbye and your heart goes: 🦋🦋🦋

You go back to school, occasionally texting Tsumu about your graduate program, and before you know it, like 5 months pass by and you’re back for summer!

Tsumu texts you and is like… sorry but I’m forcing you to be my plus-one tonight for this dinner thing I have to go to

So you dress up and he comes to pick you up, and you’re really not sure why you were surprised to see Kiyoomi sitting at the table when you arrive you give Atsumu a nice smack on the back of the head for not warning you

You sit down at the table after greeting everyone, trying your best to not act awkward when you shoot sakusa a small smile that he returns politely (but you don’t see it because of his mask)

Atsumu sits weirdly close to you the entire dinner with his arm around the back of your chair, and he’s just acting strange in general??? Like he’s bragging about your degree program and about your accomplishments, you just know he’s trying something funny; but you don’t really say anything because you don’t want to disrespect him in front of the team’s staff as a guest

You almost choke on your wine and you catch on when Bokuto starts making comments after Atsumu says something,

Atsumu: …so yeah, pretty much she should be our next president in my humble opinion

Bokuto: 🙈WOAH. WHAT?😍 HOW COULD SHE GET ANY BETTER⁉️🙄 OR HOTTER⁉️💪🏼💋

You, sitting there: 🧍‍♀️

He’s so bad at acting I’m crying..,, it becomes so obvious that they’re trying to make Kiyoomi jealous

(the boys plotted beforehand, trying to get Omi to ask you out officially; after you left, he literally would never shut up about you whenever Atsumu mentioned you, and it was just obvious he was in his feels when it came to you)

Atsumu: she’s studying at a café tonight for finals

Sakusa: Yeah so I’m glad you brought it up, because I’ve been thinking about it for days. Fine I guess I’ll say it. Her favorite coffee blend is French roast and she only likes a dash of sugar with a lot of cream, but it has to be hazelnut creamer or else she doesn’t like any-

Everyone in the gym: 🗿

LMAO ANYWAYS ITS LOWKEY WORKING you look over at him and his face is like stone.. girl..

The dinner is almost over and Atsumu gets up to go to the restroom with a wink I hate him, and you get up to catch a breath of fresh air outside

You sit on a bench for a minute, calming yourself down after the eventful dinner, but then you see the door to the restaurant swing open, Sakusa looking around the corner before spotting you

Your heart pounds in your chest as he walks over and asks if he can join you, inspecting the bench before sitting down, pulling his mask down as well

He eases into a conversation by just asking you how you’re doing, basic stuff, but then in the middle of you going off on a tangent about your stupid professor, he stops you

“I missed you.”

He crosses his legs, not looking at you as he takes your hand, intertwines it with his, and places it in his lap

You gaze at him, taken back at his confession, noticing the slight pinkness tinging his pale cheeks

You say you missed him too, and then he’s asking you if you would like to go on an actual date with him

You: wait are you asking me out officially?

Him: Yes. No I’m not. Yes I am❤️

SKSLD Please he’s awkward help him a little, you agree and then you hear a tap on the window behind you, you turn around to see Tsumu, Bokuto and Adriah behind you with big grins on their faces LMFAO 🤡

Kiyoomi rolls his eyes, but you don’t miss the small upturn of the corners of his lips as he hears Bokuto happily scream through the glass

#dont even get me started w this i dont want to look at it anymore ❤️#JUST TAKE IT LMFAOOOO #sakusa #sakusa kiyoomi #sakusa x reader #haikyuu!!#haikyu headcanons #hq #sakusa kiyoomi x you #haikyuu x reader

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marathoning-barbie · 2 years

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Barbie of Swan Lake (2003)

So, extra announcement at the top because this is a hellsite. I wanted to tag this post with a warning for discussions of antis*mitism, but I don’t want this post to get blocked because Apple sucks. This is also why I’ll censor a bunch of these terms even though everyone knows what I’m talking about. I’m sorry if you usually have the antis*mitism tw blocked.

My feelings on this movie are very complicated, and this review is going to be very different from the others.

Swan Lake was my second favorite as a child. To this day, I have an obsession with the ballet Swan Lake because of this movie, and in a way with ballet dancing in general.

There are a lot of unnecessary scenes in hindsight, mostly thanks to its source material (I wanna say it’s the most accurate adaptation of the first three movies, but then I remember Erasmus), and the forest animals are horrible, apart from Lila, who I actually kinda like this time around. The dancing is once again gorgeous, and I just can’t thank this movie enough for introducing me to the soundtrack of Swan Lake, and how it contributes to my interests to this day.

So let’s talk about Rothbart.

Rothbart is the main villain of this movie. Honestly, I wouldn’t mind him much usually. I actually love how weirdly supportive he is of his daughter Odille. Guy does everything in this movie just to please her. So what’s the problem? Well, let’s look at their designs:

Now, before I go on: I do not want to accuse anyone of anything. I also don’t want to insinuate that everyone who doesn’t see this the same way, who never noticed the connection or who still enjoys the movie is a bad person. I genuinely think that what I am going to bring up now was an accident — a very unfortunate combination of events. I mean, Rothbart was just his name in the ballet, and he’s often already portrayed as an owl-man in that, so why not give him a bird-based design?

Well, because you’re going to get a man with a Jewish name who looks like he jumped straight out of N*zi propaganda. He really is only a step below the Happy Merchant on sheer offensiveness level, hanging out and cracking open a cold one with the Harry Potter goblins (specifically the movie version, when they decided to film the Gringotts scene in a location that had the Star of David on a floor mural). The fact Barbie usually looks like she should be on some neon*zi meme with the 14 words does not help.

Once again, I fully believe this was an accident. His name was taken from the source material, and the nose is clearly supposed to resemble his beak when he’s in his bird-form. Unfortunately, Jewish people have historically been connected with birds by antis*mites (and there’s a good argument that the original ballet already includes some antis*mitism), so… make of that what you will.

The simple fact is that some associations cannot be removed, and it simply makes me too uncomfortable. This problem with him has been brought up online quite a bit when I looked into it, though I haven’t seen it specifically in fandom discussions on tumblr yet. However, I noticed it by myself without any influence on my first watch, so I’m shocked not a single person working on the movie ever went “Hey guys, isn’t this a little… weird?” Barbie’s creator Ruth Handler was a Jewish woman, and they really could’ve honored her memory a little better — especially considering she only died a year earlier.

I am not going to review the movie further at this point. I'm sorry this is such a short post in comparison to the other reviews, and I'll probably upload the PatP review in a few hours already to make up for it.

If you check the ranking, you’ll see that I have noted this movie in particular down as “Unrankable”. I can’t ignore either my rampant nostalgia, or how uncomfortable Rothbart makes me. If it wasn’t for all this, it’d end up fairly middling, still in the good section, but below Nutcracker. If you want to rewatch some Barbie movies, feel free to include this one, it’s a classic, after all. But if these unfortunate circumstances make it so you don’t want to anymore, I can’t blame you.

#barbie #barbie of swan lake #barbie swan lake #barbie movie review #barbie movies #yeah sorry I was just too shocked when I rewatched this movie for the first time

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juniorgman187 · 4 years

Text

i ♡ u (Spencer Reid Imagine)

Summary: Reader and Spencer are trapped in the office during a storm.

Category: Smut, Fluff Content Warning: cussing, unprotected sex/creampie, thunderstorm Word Count: 4.5k A/N: I don’t really like this imagine tbh so don’t be afraid to share your opinions

✧��ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

“It was a dark and stormy night just like this one . . .” Reid said with a spooky voice. Thunder clapped in the distance and lightning flashed, adding to the mood of the room. Reid waited for your reaction, but you didn’t have it in you. You pressed your fingers to your temples, hoping that moving them in a circular motion would somehow stimulate your brain and magically generate logical thoughts that weren’t clouded by your weariness.

“Sorry, Reid. I’m listening. Keep going.” You didn’t want to discourage him with your fatigue. You were the only one who would consistently give Reid the time of day, and you never faltered in that. At times, you were the only one who’d let him finish speaking.

“You usually love my campfire scary stories,” You knew without even looking at him that Reid was pouting out of disappointment. “I really think you should go home. I’ll call you if I find something or if I need you.”

“No, no you shouldn’t be working on this alone. I’ll be fine.” You slapped your cheeks gently to wake yourself up and forced yourself to refocus on the case.

Hotch and JJ had to fulfill parenting duties, Prentiss was away doing a custodial interview for a couple days, Rossi and Morgan both went home a few hours ago because they could barely keep their eyes open, and Garcia was most likely knocked out in her bat cave. The team had been working on this case for 24+ hours straight and it was draining, but you weren’t about to leave Reid alone to work on it by himself. It wasn’t a contest or a way to prove that you were somehow a better agent if you stayed up working with him, but you genuinely didn’t feel right delegating all of the responsibility onto him. It happened too often where Reid’s good heart and great work ethic was taken advantage of.

“Have you narrowed down the comfort zone?” You sipped at your lukewarm coffee, wincing at the unpleasant taste but grateful for any burst of energy you could get.

Reid nodded, drawing a large red circle. He was in the middle of explaining when his words started sounding like complete nonsense. “Interstate 55 miles true North latitude triangulate.”

You almost thought you were hallucinating or something to that effect, but Reid saw the genuine fear in your eyes and quit his prank. “No, you’re fine! You’re fine! I was just saying random words to play with you. I thought it’d scare you enough to realize you need to get some sleep.”

“Reid!” You chucked a pen at him that he successfully dodged. This only made him laugh harder. “You’re not gonna get rid of me that easy.” You told him.

“When was the last time you slept?” He asked seriously.

It was a huge red flag that it took you somewhere around a minute to come up with the answer since it had been so long that you couldn’t remember. You waved your hand in the air to rid him of his concerned expression. He had no reason to worry. “Really, I’ll be fine. It’s less dangerous to be running on less than 8 hours of sleep than it is to leave one person to solve an entire case by himself. I’m not going home, Reid. I’m here to stay.”

He noticed your stubbornness and thought of a new approach to neutralize the situation. “What if you and I both call it a night right now and then wake up in a few hours?”

Now, this sounded like a plan you could get behind. Without any resistance, you set an alarm for 5 a.m and flopped onto the couch just beside the round table. Reid joined you, slipping into his rightful spot behind you. You’d had plenty of platonic sleepovers that constituted sharing the same couch/bed with him, so this was nothing new. With your back barely touching Reid’s chest, you shut your eyes. It didn’t take more than ten minutes for both of you to drift off.

BEEEEEEP! BEEEEEEP! BEEEEEEP!

A loud blaring noise filled the room. It made you and Spencer wake up at the same time.

“What is that?” His voice was all raspy from where he just woke up.

The sound was weirdly familiar, but you didn’t know where you recognized it from. That’s when you looked out the nearest window and saw that it was still dark outside.

“I don’t know, but it’s not our alarm.” You pointed out. That’s when Reid eyed the clock on the wall.

3 a.m.

You quickly felt around in the dark, reaching inside your purse for your phone. When you pulled it out, the ear-splitting noise got louder, making you realize it was your phone after all, but you were right. It wasn’t your alarm.

“It’s just a flash flood warning.” You relayed to Reid, squinting at the brightness of your phone. No wonder Reid didn’t know what the sound was - his ancient phone didn’t have the feature. You grumbled, falling back onto the couch.

“There’s no way I’m gonna fall back asleep after that.” He groaned.

You hummed in agreement. “Yeah, I’m wide awake now.” Stupid flash flood warning.

You rubbed the sleep from your eyes while Reid stretched and got up from the couch. Checking the notifications he’d gotten on his phone, he said, “Garcia left while we were asleep.”

“And then there were two.”

Everyone was probably catching z’s while you two were catching the killer - or trying to at least.

So, if it was just going to be Reid’s brain and your brain functioning to work on the case, you needed some coffee.

“I’ll be back.” You walked down to the kitchen with your mug in hand and just as you were about to grab the coffee pot, a huge flash of lightning struck outside and suddenly the office went dark. The lights went out and the gentle hum of the generator shut off.

“Spencer!” You screamed out of fear. You heard the pitter-patter of his footsteps rushing to you. That’s when you saw Spencer using his archaic phone’s flashlight to find his way to you. He pulled you into a quick hug asking if you were okay, and you answered you were fine, just spooked. When you came down to pour coffee, you didn’t remember seeing anyone else, but now your stomach turned thinking about how someone might be in here with you - listening to you.

“Take out your gun,” He whispered. You did as he ordered you to, pulling your gun out of the holster. “Turn on the flashlight.” You clicked it on and handed it over to him, remembering that he didn’t have a flashlight on his gun because he had a revolver.

“Stay behind me.” He commanded. You moved back, basically hugging him from behind. You thought you were actually going to pass out from fear if you didn’t hold onto him for dear life. He did a quick pass with the flashlight, revealing no one else was in the bullpen unless they were hiding.

BANG! BANG!

You yelped in fear. “It’s just the thunder, Y/N,” He reasoned, reminding you of the ongoing storm. Oh right, there was a thunderstorm happening, too. Great. “Here take this and go back to the conference room.” He gave you his revolver and kept your gun, ushering you to walk back to the round table.

“What? Why? Where are you going?” Your small voice had never sounded so shaky.

“I’m gonna check the power box and see if I can fix it.”

Your first instinct was to shake your head disapprovingly, but then you remembered that he couldn’t see you in the dark. “No way! You’re not leaving me alone in a dark room. I’m coming with you.”

He didn’t argue against it probably because he was just as scared as you were. Reid did another quick survey of the room, using the beam of your flashlight to double check that there was no one else around.

As you clung to Reid, you made yourself sick just by thinking of all the horrifying possibilities that could happen. For all you knew, a whole group of unsubs was waiting for you at the power box, knowing you and Reid would check there as soon as the electricity went out. Would whatever happened to you two tonight become a campfire scary story that other FBI agents would talk about just like how you and Reid talk about them? The odds were not in your favor. No lights. Storm outside. 3 a.m. Just the two of you, and no offense to Reid, but if this were a horror movie, he was probably the last person you wanted to be with. Top of the list was easily Morgan, because at least if Morgan was scared shitless by the predicament, he wouldn’t show it.

While Reid led the two of you through the pitch black darkness, both of your hands were holding onto his upper arm. You’d taken cover behind him, poking your head past his shoulder just far enough to see what he was seeing but only so far that you could duck quickly if you needed to. Frankly, Spencer didn’t even seem to mind that you were clinging onto him for protection. It kind of made him feel good actually.

When you reached the power box, you released your grip on him, only realizing just how tight you’d been clutching him when you saw imprints left on his shirt from where you’d been holding on.

“Take this.” He handed you the flashlight while he used both of his hands to pry open the box.

You watched as his fingers grazed over the wires and fiddled with the buttons. Would it be weird to admit that his hands were kind of attractive? You’d never realized the largeness of them or how veiny they were, but there was something about them that made them so sexy to you.

He made a disapproving sound after further inspection.

“What’s wrong?” You weren’t actually wondering, but if you asked him, it would seem like you were actually paying attention to the situation at hand and not his hands.

“It looks like the power shut off from a larger source, meaning there could be a blackout citywide. That also means I can’t fix it.”

Hearing you’d be in the dark with no heat source was enough to snap you out of your trance.

“I have an idea.” You led Reid to Garcia’s bat cave, after a memory of Garcia showing you her collection of glow in the dark figurines replayed in your mind.

When you opened the cabinet, you smiled instantly at the sight of all the toys brightly lighting up the inside of the drawer. You knew that spending hours with Garcia listening about her toy collection would pay off eventually. Both of you carried all the toys you could and headed right back into the conference room. You placed them sporadically so that the entire room was dimly lit. Had these been candles instead of luminescent toys, it would’ve been ambient and romantic, but again - they weren’t candles.

Unintentionally, you shivered audibly when a loud wind crashed just outside. The generator went out along with the lights, so it was awfully cold in the room.

Reid was about to give you his sweater when you stopped him by walking right up to him and stealing his body heat in a hug. Rather than embracing him around his sweater, you snaked your arms under the cardigan to really feel his warmth. And as if Reid was trying to kill you with kindness, he pulled the sides of his sweater to stretch around your back and swaddled you into his sweater with him. You smiled against his chest. Not much could make this moment sweeter.

“Better now?” He asked, peering down at your face.

You silently nodded, closing your eyes as if removing your sense of sight would heighten your sense of touch. You wanted to feel his affection as deeply as you could.

“Tell me when you want me to let go.”

“Not yet.”

He laughed at your childish desire to be swaddled like this, but he was enjoying the warmth just as much as you were.

“We can’t do much work with the power out so let’s just try to get some more sleep.” He walked with you to the couch, keeping his promise of not letting go until you told him to.

With the storm outside and the flash flood warning, you two would just have to stay in the conference room until you had the all clear. You weren’t opposed to this entirely, though. There were much worse things you could do than listen to the rain in the arms of Spencer Reid.

“Okay, you can let go now but just for a second.” Your baby voice made him chuckle. He loved how you unabashed you were when asking for his attention. Reid laid down just as he did before, with his back on the backrest of the couch, and instead of having your back to him, you cuddled right up to him. While still wearing his sweater, he covered you in it again, drawing you even closer.

For some reason, even though you were beat and you knew you needed the sleep, you couldn’t seem to shut your mind off and rest. You were awake for what felt like hours. You would’ve tossed and turned all night, but instead, you kept very still so Reid wouldn’t wake up.

You’d be so focused on trying to fall asleep yourself that you didn’t even notice when Reid did. When you looked up, you saw his mouth was slightly agape, his eyes were shut and would occasionally flutter, and when you pressed your ear to his chest, he was breathing much slower than he was earlier.

“If you stay still for 15 minutes, you’ll fall asleep. Just lay in the same position and don’t move.” He mumbled. So he wasn’t asleep? And he knew you weren’t either?

“I have been staying still, but it’s not working.” You whined.

“Just try.” Reid murmured again.

You shut up and sighed, closing your eyes. This time, you made a conscious effort not to move a muscle. You even counted to 60 in your head 15 times, but after those 15 minutes, you were still awake. You weren’t even sure what was causing your insomnia. It was really peaceful to have the sound of the rain cascading down the window and the occasional boom of thunder outside. Being in Spencer’s arms was cozy, too, but there was still something keeping you up.

“Spencer? Are you awake?” You scooted up so you could see his face.

The only thing the moon was illuminating clearly was his lips. There was a distinct beam of silver light casting on his mouth, almost like it was lighting them up specifically. Like some sort of sign. A sudden urge possessed you, so without reason, you brought your hand up to his face and grazed your thumb over his bottom lip. Even with the gentle touch you were using, you were still able to feel how soft it was. You slowly dragged your thumb in a downwards motion, watching the elasticity of his lips cause it to bounce back up into its place. You nearly giggled at the sight. You moved your thumb to the corner of his mouth and followed it upwards to the natural curve of his upper lip. If you weren’t so observant before, you wouldn’t have noticed how Spencer very subtly parted his lips wider for you. Curiosity overcame you and you slowly inched closer to his mouth with your own.

“I think I want to kiss you . . . Can I kiss you?” You spoke in a soft voice, with each of your lips ghosting over his.

A moment of stillness. Maybe he was asleep. Then, a small, very small nod of Reid’s head. You smiled as he let you take control. With your hand already along his jaw, you lifted his face slightly so you could feel the full force of your kiss. You pulled him in closer to relish the soft feeling of his puckered lips. He released his grip on the sweater that was still swaddling you so he could press the small of your back, forcing your hips to drive into his. The need to be even closer was translating into the kiss. It grew hungrier - more passionate and needy. Spencer raised up from the couch, propping himself up on his forearm so he could hover over you. You followed his lead and shifted to be underneath him. With his body over you, he was able to push off his forearms and onto his hands. They were on either side of your head, forcing you to sit up with him so your lips wouldn’t leave his.

“Wait, wait,” He muttered, pulling away. You followed him with your mouth is desperation, until you couldn’t anymore, making you sit up entirely while Spencer backed away.

“What’s wrong?”

“If we don’t stop now, I don’t know if I can stop later . . . I won’t be able to control myself.”

It was in this moment you realize why you were often the only member on the team who’d actually listen to Reid. Nothing he could say would ever turn you off. Any word that escaped his lips was something you wanted to hear. His confession of being uncontrollable was no exception.

“Do you know what I want to do?” There was a newfound confidence in your tone that shocked the both of you.

“What do you want to do, Y/N?” Apparently, Spencer’s tone was just the opposite. He sounded like he was trembling with fear with anticipation.

“Guess.” You flirted.

Even in the dark, you could see Reid’s gears turning as he tried to find the right answer. He read your expression for a hint and made his guess by planting a chaste kiss on your lips.

“You’re cold.”

He quickly caught on. You were making a game out of this.

Hot and cold.

Reid made his next move with uncertainty. He slowly started moving forward to resume the position he had before he pulled away. As he came closer, you followed his lead and leisurely fell back. Every inch he would advance closer to you was an inch that you’d move back further until finally your back was pressed against the couch again and Spencer was hanging over you once more. With each of his hands beside your head, you smirked. “Getting warmer.”

This boosted his confidence. He was heading the right direction, and there was nothing Spencer loved more than to get things right.

The same moonlight that was streaming onto his lips earlier was dancing on his eyes. The hazel color glimmered in the silver light. You could see they were asking, ‘Can I?’ You answered his look with a silent nod.

Spencer reached behind him, following his hand with his eyes as he watched his fingers brush along your thigh. Looking back up at you for permission, which you granted, he peered back down, watching his fingers slip underneath the hem of your skirt. You lifted your hips up so he could raise the skirt all the way up. As if he was uncovering lost treasure, his eyes lit up when you were finally uncovered.

“Fuck me.” He cursed under his breath. This made you ooze with confidence.

You sat up to align your lips right beside his ear. With a breathy voice, you whispered,

“Hot.”

He’d finally figured out what you wanted.

The satisfaction he had in winning your little game gave him the confidence he needed to finally make a move.

Hurriedly, he dragged your panties off, leaving prominent scratches from his nails on your thighs. He threw them somewhere behind him, while you frantically unbuttoned his dress pants. You almost giggled with glee when you saw just how hard he was. You barely did anything to provoke him, but he clearly enjoyed what little you did do.

“I don’t have a -” You cut him off with a hasty kiss.

“You don’t need to worry about that.” You needn’t explain more. He got the message when you reached down and gave his shaft a few shallow strokes.

“Oh-” He was immediately caught off guard by your forwardness. “Wait, wait shouldn’t I . . . um, help you first-”

You smiled at his stutter. “Spencer, please. I need you now.”

There was that unabashed ask for Spencer’s attention that he loved so much. He made small movements until he was properly aligned with your entrance.

“Tell me if I’m hurting you.” He breathlessly uttered, while gradually pushing in.

You thought you would’ve regretted not letting him finger you before in preparation but the bliss was far greater for some reason.

The sensation was definitely new to Spencer when his eyes widened. “Oh fuck. You’re so tight.”

Meanwhile, your face contorted at the feeling of him stretching you out. It was actually more painful than pleasurable.

“Wait, Spencer - I need to change positions.” You panted.

He instantly retracted, looking incredibly sorry. “Here,” He helped you up to your feet while taking a seat on the couch. You didn’t need an IQ of 187 to figure out how to position yourself, so you straddled Spencer, hovering over his erection. Taking charge now that you knew you’d feel more comfortable like this, you reached below you to align his length. Instantly, euphoria washed over you when you lowered yourself all the way until you were practically sitting on his lap. Spencer let out a heavy exhale now that you were able to take all of him in this new position. You moved your hands out from under you and put them on Spencer’s shoulders as a way to stabilize you each time you’d come up. After a few cursory movements, you found a comfortable pace. Spencer couldn’t contain himself, he had to grab your hips in his hands and buck up before, his pelvis meeting your ass before you could even fully lower yourself again. With the tempo of motion increasing drastically because of Spencer’s participation, you couldn’t even adjust to his length anymore. Every time he’d pull out was temporary relief for the ever-growing knot forming in your stomach. You bit back a moan when Spencer curled his hips to thrust into you at a different angle. This stroke mercilessly hit that knot in your stomach, forcing a strangled noise out.

“Don’t stop, Spencer!” You were surprised at how you were even able to put together a cohesive sentence since your brain felt like it was short circuiting.

With Spencer’s curved thrusts, the knot in your stomach grew bigger and bigger. You even felt yourself clench around Spencer. He felt it, too and his head instantly lolled back in pleasure. His eyes rolled to the back of his head with him. Your skin felt prickly as sweat started dripping from your forehead. If you didn’t know any better, the generator was working again because the heat in the room was thick. Spencer’s strokes were growing slower in anticipation. You picked up the pace for him and made a conscious clench around him to help him reach his peak.

“I can’t control myself, Y/N. I need to pull out now.” He sputtered.

You made an indistinct noise that communicated your disapproval. It was the only thing Spencer needed to hear to know that it was okay if he came.

“Cum for me, baby.” You moaned, knowing you were going to follow close behind.

He dug his nails into your hips, bringing you back to reality as if it was his way of pinching you to tell you it was real. From the pain of his hands clawing into you, you almost couldn’t feel him coming, until you felt it dribble down your inner thigh. Suddenly, it felt like his warm essence made electricity surge through your body and course through your veins. With a speed faster than light itself, the knot in your stomach released. You cried out as his seed mixed with your own and cascaded down like the relentless rain outside cascaded down the window. The euphoria of your orgasm brought you to a complete stop.

“Holy fuck.” You swallowed hard. The inside of your mouth was dry from where it hung open for so long.

Spencer was at a loss for words. His silence was so unfamiliar you had to giggle.

“You okay?” You lifted yourself off of his lap to gain some clarity. He gulped hard.

“Am I dreaming?” He sounded genuinely dazed and confused, it was adorable.

Garcia’s glow in the dark toys helped you to find a box of tissues. You took one from the box and wiped yourself before pulling your skirt back down. Meanwhile, Spencer zipped up his pants and ran his fingers through his hair.

“Spencer,” You laughed a little. “You’re scaring me. Are you okay?”

He hadn’t changed his spot on the couch so you straddled his lap again, this time with more pure intentions.

You wrapped your arms around his neck, burying your face in his neck, while his hands rested on your hips again and his lips were pressing on your shoulder, leaving quick pecks.

“I’ve wanted to do that for so long.” He confessed against your skin. You leaned back so you could see his face and kept your hands behind his head to play with the hair on the nape of his neck. Enjoying your soothing touch, he closed his eyes and tilted his head to lay against your wrist. He was so precious like this. With Spencer’s head cocked to the side, a distinct beam of light was revealed. This time it was shining onto your face, almost like what it feels like when you accidentally walk past a projector screen and look at the projector light. In this instance though, the light wasn’t nearly as blinding. It was soft and ethereal. It lit up the rain falling on the other side of the window. It even displayed signs of steam coming from the inside. You could see condensation running down the pane. It had gotten so hot in here because of you two that steam was produced. That felt like some sort of accomplishment. You mirthlessly chuckled and leaned forward. With this sudden movement, your chest was pressing against Spencer’s. He was forced to lift his head back up from your wrist when he wanted to examine what you were doing. You leaned past the backrest of the couch and exhaled a hot breath onto the window to make it fog up. Spencer watched you do this over his shoulder, trying to figure out what you were doing. With the glass fogged up, you started drawing a heart with your index finger. You lazily shaded in the heart and looked back at Spencer to show off your creation. It wasn’t pretty by any means, but it meant something.

Spencer pulled a hand away from your hip to use his fingers to add to the drawing. To the left of the heart, Spencer drew a vertical line with a dot above it, and then to the right of it he drew a small horseshoe shape. You pouted your lips when you finally got the message.

i ♡ u

You looked at him before blowing another hot breath onto the already existing fog to extend it. You drew a number right beside it.

i ♡ u 2

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

#smut #spencer reid #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid fanfiction #criminal minds #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds fanfic #criminal minds fanfiction #spencer reid smut #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x y/n #criminal minds smut

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pleathewrites · 3 years

Text

boys, boys, boys

chapter 2: revelations

Summary: Does Iwaizumi have a thing for setters or do setters have a thing for Iwaizumi?

“Maybe Iwa-kun does have a thing for grey hair,” Sugawara muses, the tip of his index finger circling the rim of his drink. He’s got that signature sly smirk across the very lips that locked with Hajime's a decade ago.

“Oh my God.”

Hajime is seriously considering begging Oikawa to jump-serve a volleyball to his head and knock him clean out just so they can all stop having this conversation - ‘Hell, Tooru’s strong as hell now. Might knock the entire memory of this night right out of my brain, for good.’

“Hey, I just made out with him - and possibly gave him his gay awakening. But I wasn’t the one who convinced him to change his career.”

“Oh my God.”

“Wait, what are you - ”

“Daichi, baby, seriously, you need to go see that doctor. I am actively concerned about you developing early-onset Alzheimer's," Sugawara says, tucking a strand of Sawamura's hair behind his ear, his impish smirk melting into a fond smile, "Does Shiratorizawa ring any bells?”

“Hey, I have my own life to worry about! I’m not gonna keep track of someone else’s love life - no offense, Iwaizumi-san.”

“Hey, non-taken. Please, never think about my love life.”

Much to Hajime’s horror, Daichi’s expression turns contemplative, “Wait, actually, though -”

“Fuck -”

“… Grey hair, Shiratorizawa...” Daichi snaps his fingers and points his index at Iwaizumi with a much-too-proud smile on his face, completely unaware of the man’s rising irritation. “Yes, right! Iwaizumi, didn’t you..?”

“Ugh, God, that one,” injects Oikawa.

Hajime feels the vein on his forehead throb at Oikawa’s tone, “Kawa... why are you so shitty.”

“Well, sorry, if I don’t like the edge-lord that busted my entire future!”

“Oikawa… You are literally at the Olympics… for the second time...”

“Yeah, with you on the opposing side,” Oikawa says with a closed throat, sliding out of the booth, and heading off to the direction of the entrance doors.

Hajime sighs.

Their loss to Shiratorizawa is soul-crushing - it always is.

‘Always’ - that’s the most crushing thing, Hajime despairs, ‘We always lose to that school.’ And Hajime feels the blow, of course, he's devastated, but it’s not personal, hell, it’s not even for his team - ‘God, I’m such a shitty Vice-Captain.’

No, the absolute heartbreak he feels is for Tooru.

Hajime loves his team, he believes every single member has outrageous talent, but he knows that all their abilities combined, including his own, wouldn’t even hold a candle to Oikawa’s blinding torch.

Shiratorizawa is a school for rising champions, Abo Johsai is a school for kids with talent.

Oikawa Tooru is on a completely different level, it's a fact - he outranks his own team. It keeps Hajime up at night because he knows that if Oikawa had a team that matched his talent and ability, he would never have to experience such consistent defeat.

In times like these, Hajime feels shameful and useless, ‘How long will I hold Oikawa back?’

Hajime knows Oikawa. He knows he’s the real reason Oikawa chose Abo Josai, that because Hajime wasn’t good enough to get into Shiratorizawa, Oikawa shackled himself to a team that weighs more than he can carry. It reminds Hajime of those free-body-diagrams from physics class that Oikawa had to explain to him ten times over; Oikawa is the upward force, striving for victory at the speed of light, Hajime is the opposing frictional force, and Abo Johsai is plain gravity times mass times sine (or was it cosine?). Hajime only managed to scrape a B- in that class, so the only answer he can give this problem is that Oikawa isn't going anywhere, any time soon.

A harsh slap to his back snaps Hajime out of his thoughts. He jumps with the force of it and doesn’t even have to turn his head to know who’s hand is laying firmly between his shoulder blades. He keeps his eyes downcast, but Oikawa - a true Captain - doesn’t force Hajime to look at him when he firmly whispers, “Next time, Iwa-chan. We’ll get ‘em.”

Their coach takes the team for ramen, gives them a speech about being proud and working hard, all while Oikawa is making faces at Hajime from across the table and, slowly, Hajime begins to let himself smile.

Halfway through dinner, Hajime feels his phone vibrate in his pocket. Thinking it’s his mother asking when he’ll be home, Hajime turns on the lockscreen and sees it’s an Instagram notification. He unlocks his phone and swipes down his Notifications - Hajime had to reset his phone notifications to conceal messages ever since becoming friends with Sugawara Koushi because the boy has zero filter and he doesn’t need his mom accidentally seeing messages with eggplant and squirting emojis, encouraging Hajime to make ‘his move’, whatever that means.

EITA (@notsemisemi) has requested to follow you.

Now, Hajime is confused. He doesn’t even remember the last time he posted a picture on Instagram - he only really made the account because Oikawa started crying about, “Iwa-chan, I want to tag you in this picture, people should know that you’re capable of smiling! Everyone else has an Instagram, let me make you one, you won’t even have to do anything!” - so he’s not really sure how or why a random person requested to follow him.

'Maybe it's a spam account?'

He looks closely at the username and tries to think if he knows anyone with that name. When nothing comes to mind, he clicks on the person’s account and is met with very aesthetically angsty selfies of a grey-haired boy with sharp eyebrows and deep collarbones. ‘

He’s kind of…’ Hajime tries to think of the right words. He wants to say ‘pretty’, but that doesn’t feel right - Sugawara is pretty, Oikawa is pretty. Pretty people are soft and round and peppy. This guy is…

‘Hot.’

And weirdly familiar.

He elbows Matsukawa, who’s sitting on his right, and turns his phone screen towards the boy, “Do you know this guy?”

“Hmph?” Matsukawa’s lazy eyes roam over his screen and he swallows his food before speaking, “Yeah, isn’t that the reserve setter? He came in as a sub when Oikawa hit Shiratorizawa’s main setter.”

Like a self-conscious self-absorbed bat, whenever Oikawa’s name is merely uttered, the boy in question will hear it, no matter what he's doing, “Eh? Oikawa hit who? I swear, it couldn't have been me, I’m a pacifist!” And he proceeds to put his hands up in surrender.

The lightbulb goes off in Hajime's head, “Oh! When Oikawa jump-served the ball at that small guy’s face? With the uneven bangs?” He makes a downward sloping motion across his forehead.

“Yeah, that one,” Matsukawa points to the phone screen, “Pretty sure that’s the guy who subbed for the rest of the set.”

“Yeah…” Hajime trails, before adding softly, “He was good… Wonder why their coach didn't give him more playtime.”

Oikawa’s quick-clapping hands bring Hajime out of his thoughts, “Oh! I know what we’re talking about now! First off, I didn’t hit Shorty, he wasn’t fast enough, that’s the consequence of the game! Also, why are we talking about this?”

“Iwaizumi is on the sub’s Instagram page.”

Oikawa squeaks, “Is this about your grey-hair-slash-old-man fetish?!”

Hajime groans and facepalms, “No, oh my God, stop telling people I have a fetish, Shittykawa! He followed me.”

“Block him!”

Hajime sighs, locks his phone, and puts it away, “Just forget it.”

“Hmph. That guy’s not even first string. What does he want with our ace?”

Hanamaki joins in, “I wonder why he’s not first string, though. I’m pretty sure he’s a third year, he’s been there every time we played against them. 'M pretty sure that Shorty is definitely a second year.”

Oikawa’s face turns from snooty to serious and he crosses his arms, “He’s good, but he lacks instinct. His technique is fine, but he doesn’t have what Shorty does. Maybe if he worked harder, but from the looks of it tonight, he doesn’t want it bad enough. He’s not on Shiratorizawa’s level - maybe he was once, but not anymore.”

'Not on Shiratorizawa’s level… Sounds like we might have something in common, after all.’

That night, before Hajime goes to sleep, he accepts EITA’s follow request and follows him back.

continue to read chapter

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thatgamefromthatad · 3 years

Text

Seen these ads? (Obey Me! Review)

This is a visual novel/otome/gacha card RPG game with the same characters and themes as featured in the ads.

As stated in many of the ads this game centers around seven demon brother love interests (as well as some other potential love interests) although the game has a lot of plot elements other than just romance. Most of the ads that I’ve seen feature real art that appears in the game one way or another, and the ads tend to be focused more on the characters and theme in general rather than specific gameplay. Of the ads that do appear to show gameplay, most of the time it’s not really what you’ll see in the game but still follows fairly close to the actual game (for example, the “kiss, free, whip” ad on the top left doesn’t show real gameplay, but you can kiss or whip that character. But that specific art comes from a gacha card I believe and isn’t what you see when you do the kissing and whipping).

A few notes before I get into the full review:

I’m a lesbian, so I’m definitely not the target audience for this game, but I always try to be objective and open-minded when playing any game I’m not the target audience for (other examples I’ve reviewed in the past are Moments, which was also primarily targeted toward women who are attracted to men, Immortal Taoists, which involved a genre I had never heard of before and really had no interest in, Time Princess, which also wasn’t my favorite genre but was still a great game, and various Genius Inc. visual novels, which are targeted more toward high-school age boys as far as I can tell).

Speaking of lesbians, this game weirdly censors the word “lesbians” but not any other LGBTQ+ terms (that don’t include the word “sexual”) as far as I can tell; I decided it was enough of a one-off thing that it wouldn’t factor a huge amount in my overall review of the game, but I think it’s still something to take note of and not let off the hook since it definitely shows bias and can be offensive to players.

This game is rated 12+ on the Apple App Store, and I was pretty harsh on Crush Crush for being rated that way because I thought it crossed the line with some of its sexually suggestive content. I kept that in mind while playing this one, and personally I don’t think it crossed the line in the same way, at least not from what I’ve played so far; although it does have sexually suggestive content (most often when interacting with the character Asmodeus, who is literally known in the game as the “Avatar of Lust”), it’s much more occasional through tidbits of dialog as opposed to in Crush Crush where it involved a whole section of the game and was more interactive in nature. I would definitely still cringe at the thought of a 12-year-old reading some of this dialog, but I think it fits fairly within the App Store descriptors of “Infrequent/Mild Sexual Content and Nudity” and “Infrequent/Mild Mature/Suggestive Themes.”

Last note - there is a character in this game (Luke) who has the appearance and demeanor of a small child who you can interact with in a similar way to the other love interest characters, which concerned me for obvious reasons. I looked more into this, specifically reading into all of the different dialog options involving this character, and his responses never seem to be more than platonic, which is good. He still blushes when you give him gifts and stuff, which is kind of awkward, and it seems weird to throw a kid character into an otome game, but all considered I wouldn’t say the game is promoting anything inappropriate (unlike one of the Genius VNs that clearly involved relationships between an adult and minors).

Sorry I know that’s a lot of notes and disclaimers but I just wanted to that all out of the way as general concerns anyone might have trying this game or reading this review!

Without further ado, read my full review below:

***

(I’m trying a new color-coding system to help highlight some of the main points of my review if you don’t want to read my entire essay word-for-word lol. Pink is a positive aspect of the game, red is a negative aspect/criticism and purple is not necessarily positive or negative but just something I wanted to highlight.)

😈 Is the game actually fun? Yes! Just in terms of production value, this game is top notch: the art and character designs are very appealing, the transitions between characters’ poses and facial expressions during VN scenes are actually animated (which looks much smoother and more natural than switching between still images), the voice acting is great (although the VN scenes aren’t fully voice acted, some parts like phone calls are and the characters say different phrases during scenes and battles as well)(Note: all the voice acting is Japanese), and the music is FANTASTIC and perfectly sets the vibe throughout the game.

The best parts of this game in my opinion are the different personalities of the characters and the overall plot; although some of the characters’ personalities can be a bit one-note at times (for example, one character’s entire personality that I’ve seen so far is that he likes to eat and is always hungry), the characters each have their own charm and play off each other well. I found myself getting invested in each of the characters’ desires and goals throughout the story, even the characters I didn’t particularly like. The story is also chock full of humor which is always fun, and the whole world and backstory built around this game (the “Devildom” setting and the idea of an exchange student program with angels, humans and demons) are also unique and impressive.

I really enjoyed the multiple modes of storytelling i.e. how the VN chapters are supplemented with text messages and phone calls from characters and an Instagram spoof with additional side stories to unlock. I know this isn’t a new thing in mobile games (even Gardenscapes and Homescapes do it to an extent lol) but add the compelling characters and overall production value on top and it’s a really enjoyable experience. Since the home screen of the game is set up like it’s your phone, with the different parts of the game represented as “apps,” the game kind of creates a feeling like you’re really living in this world with these characters where you can freely scroll through their Instagram feeds and check the messages you get from them on your own time. The shop where you can buy items and premium currency is called Akuzon (an Amazon spoof) and the place where all your gacha cards are is called “contacts,” which further adds to the immersive effect.

The “dating” part of the game is pretty cute although I haven’t gotten super far so I’m not sure of the full scope of the romantic interactions. From what I can tell, in addition to the dialog, blushy faces and bedroom eyes you get from characters when you give them gifts and touch different parts of their body (above the belt lol), when you raise your intimacy level with them you get additional phone calls and messages from them (I haven’t played a lot of otome games but I think that’s how a lot of them go). I wasn’t that invested in this part of the game but I think there’s some strategy that goes with using the right combination of gifts and touches to maximize intimacy boosts and get certain dialog, which adds a whole other aspect of gameplay in addition to the main game. I also noticed that occasionally your choices throughout the VN chapters will give you a small intimacy boost with a certain character; I kind of wish this was even more integrated since most of the time I felt like no matter what I chose it didn’t make any difference in my relationship with characters. Also, I don’t think there’s a way to “officially” date a specific character, it’s more about raising the intimacy level to earn more interactions but it doesn’t actually affect the main plot.

As far as the main mode of progressing through the game, which is winning “dance battles” with teams from your gacha collection, this part of the game has its own positive qualities such as the cute chibi forms of the characters that appear on screen and the fact that some of the special attacks show a little anime clip of the character (of course it’s less exciting when you see the same clip every battle but I still thought it was a nice touch). I was a little disappointed that there wasn’t a rhythm aspect as the “dance battle” name would imply, and your main interaction during the battle itself is basically just tapping hearts that pop up and tapping the characters when their attacks are ready, but you also have the option to skip that whole interactive sequence and just get a result based on your team’s stats, so there’s not much to complain about there (especially since the battles are sort of a side note compared to the storytelling aspect of the game despite being the main element of RPG-based gameplay that allows you to progress). If you are interested in the RPG aspects, there’s plenty of that to work with (building teams, balancing attributes, managing resources/rewards to level up cards and progress through skill trees of sorts, all that good stuff) although you’re limited to an extent by how difficult it is to get a lot of gacha draws without paying real money. It’s even harder to be able to focus on both strategy and character relationships while playing for free when the same scarce currency is used for both gacha draws and gifts.

👿 Is this a free game or a “free game”? Despite what I just said, I would still consider it a free game - you can gradually save up some of premium currency the game gives out through tasks in order to pay for more gacha draws and other items, and as far as I can tell you can access the main story and the other parts of the game without hitting a paywall. I only got to the fourth chapter so far though so don’t take this assessment as gospel. Like with a lot of other freemium games you might feel pressured to pay (especially when you run out of gifts to give your lover boys, which was the biggest downer for me, or if you’re obsessed with wanting to collect a lot of cards or get a specific card) but since you don’t actually need to pay to progress I still consider it free.

There’s also an energy system where you hit a wall and have to wait if you run out, but I never ran out because of the huge amount of energy the game dumps on you when you first start, and it seems like there are a bunch of other ways to get extra energy as well. There also aren’t pop-up or watch-to-earn ads in this game that I saw.

💀 Features

Main visual novel scenes and storyline (the visual novel scenes come between dance battle stages and there are a few short side routes that branch off but still one main route as far as I can tell, I don’t think your dialog choices really make a different except for in how the characters react to you immediately afterward. Still the main storyline in itself is fun to follow and it’s fun to get different reactions out of the characters based on what you say)

Dance battles (I’m not fully knowledgeable about the minutia of the RPG system at play here but in general the outcome of the battle will depend on the level, rank and attributes of your cards compared against the difficulty and attributes of the stage you’re playing. There also “memory cards” that can be assigned to support your team and expendable temporary boosters called “glow sticks” that boost your stats for one battle. During the battle itself you tap hearts that appear to earn extra points and you can tap your characters when their power is charged up to “attack” your opponent and use special skills. There are guides online that go deeper into stats and strategies and such if you’re interested. Different stages have different rewards for completion and you can quick complete levels you’ve already beaten to mine resources you need)

Gacha mechanic and cards (the gacha area of this game is called “Nightmare” and there are a few different pools along with event pools each with their own odds and sets of cards you can get. For the default pools you get free draws periodically and I believe you get one free draw for each event pool IIRC. You also get a bunch of vouchers for draws when you first start the game which got me handful of SSRs and a couple URs to build a couple of solid teams right off the bat. In addition to drawing directly from gacha pools you can get some cards by collecting card pieces as rewards from stages and events until you have enough to get the actual card. Each card has its own set of stats/attributes, can be leveled up and has a skill tree of sorts that can be progressed through with resources mined through beating stages, although it’s more of an attribute tree than a skill tree since most of the branches just add points onto one of your card’s attributes. Some cards, the rarer ones, have special skills that can be used in battle)

One-on-one characters interactions and intimacy i.e. the “dating” part (there are two ways this occurs: 1) you can set a specific character to your home screen that allows you to enter into an interaction with them, with a refresh period in between interactions 2) the main way, which is through “surprise guests” after dance battles. These surprise guests show up frequently but not always, and they’re always one of the three team members you used in battle, selected randomly. For each one-on-one interaction you can do three actions - either give a gift, touch the character or ignore the character. Sometimes the character will also offer you a high five which counts as an action if you oblige. Different characters have different favorite gifts and touching different parts of the body can get a different reaction depending on the character and your level of intimacy I believe. Your intimacy level with a character increases depending on the combination of actions you perform, and sometimes the character also gives you gifts back like more energy or resources. There are guides for this online as well)

Text messages and phone calls (text messages are the main mode of storytelling outside of the main VN scenes - you get messages from characters or multiple characters in group chats that you respond to with preset messages or stickers similar to how you make choices during the VN parts. Some of the text messages correspond with the main plot as you progress, ex. A character texts you to be in a certain place at a certain time and next VN scene is of you two meeting at that place. I think other text messages also come up when you reach certain intimacy levels with characters. There are certain group messages that you don’t respond to where you’re basically spying on a group chat among characters and just get to see what everyone’s saying. In addition to written messages and emoji stickers characters will also sometimes send pictures. Phone calls are fully voice-acted dialog you have with another character and they seem to pop up when you reach certain intimacy levels - I’ve only gotten ones so far with the two characters I have the highest intimacy with)

Instagram spoof/“Devilgram” (Devilgram is an in-game photo sharing social media app similar to Instagram and the photos on there correspond to gacha cards. When you acquire the gacha card that corresponds to a Devilgram post you unlock a side story, but you also need keys to unlock further scenes from that story, which can be gradually earned through completing tasks and such)

To Do tasks (completing tasks on your To Do is the main way to earn premium currency in the game along with other rewards and resources. There are daily tasks, overall tasks and tasks specific to each character. Examples of tasks are completing a certain stage or number of stages, beating a stage using a team that includes a certain character or reaching a certain intimacy level with a character. There are also beginner missions when you start the game that I think stay available until you complete all of them)

Events (there are sometimes side story events called “pop quizzes” and gacha events that are available for a limited time, or sometimes an event has both a corresponding pop quiz and gacha pool. The pop quizzes are separate chapters with their own dance battles and VN scenes, and the battles will come with reward points that you can spend on different prizes. Sometimes there are unique cards you can only get from an event. Other minor types of events include log-in bonus events and events where you can get special types of gifts for your love interests. There’s also a feature where you can “time-travel” back to old events at some cost but I haven’t explored this much)

Jobs (you can assign characters to passively complete jobs that earn you a small amount of non-premium currency over time and also increases your intimacy with the assigned characters by a small amount)

Customization (you can unlock avatars of different characters to use for your profile and set the name you want characters to refer to you by throughout the game. You can also change the outfit of your homescreen character, change the homescreen wallpaper and change the homescreen background music by making purchases in the Akuzon shop or acquiring certain gacha cards)

⚖️ Ad Honesty Rating: 4/5 (just from the ads I’ve seen, especially the ones that appear to be running currently, there don’t seem to be blatantly fake ads and the ads show real art and do well conveying the theme and characters in the game. However some of the ads are misleading about the actual mechanics of gameplay and may also lead you to believe there are actual romance routes with the characters which is not really the case)

⭐️ Overall Rating: 5/5 (I definitely didn’t want to give this game a great rating just because it’s super popular on Tumblr but I can definitely see why it’s so popular. There are lots of things to do, the characters are very lovable, it’s funny, the art is great, the music is great and the lore and overall vibe are compelling and unique. It’s a high-quality game with a good story and I’ll probably keep playing it)

▶️ Ad Example:

▶️ Gameplay Examples:

Dance Battles

youtube

Surprise Guest

youtube

If you got through this review bless your heart ❤️ Special thanks to @human-watching-ads-from-devildom which is where I was able to view some of the ads since I was having trouble finding them elsewhere online and viewing some of them on the Facebook ad library.

Follow me for more reviews of those free mobile games you’re always getting ads for! Thanks for reading! 🥳

#obey me #obey me shall we date #otome games #gacha games #visual novels #full review #anime games #rpg #dating simulation games #romance games #war and peace but it’s just a review of a mobile game #sorry if there are typos or mistakes

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snowboiwinwin · 3 years

Note

Hello! If it's okay, can I ask for a "Day6 as boyfriends" post?? Thank you and take care 😘😘

Thank you very much for requesting! Hope you’re well and enjoy this little something I came up with 😘🥰

--------------------------------------------

Sungjin:

I honestly love this guy

he isn’t one to seek attention or one to speak up

but i feel like he truly cares and loves with his whole heart

he may seem a little cold on the outside but he is such a sweetheart

so please do not expect him to be huge into PDA

he might have an arm around your waist if you’re in crowded places but other than that? nothing

around the boys he is also distanced

his reputation as leader could be at risk

but when the boys tease him of how cold he acts, he sulks and defends himself but then smooches your face

just to prove a point, not because he is absolutely in love with you, lol

dates with him are always super laid back

a nice dinner at home, movies and snacks

not much but exactly how you like it

Sungjin might be distanced by day but by night he NEEDS your affection and touch

please hold him while sleeping, play with his hair and just love him

i also get the vibes from him that he is quite insecure

he might seem confident but he needs quite a lot of reassurance

just please love him and make him feel like the king he is

“Did you know, that you are the man of my dreams? Like seriously, there is no one else that has ever made me feel this way. I love you handsome, I truly do.”

*blushes hardcore and slightly slaps you shoulder* Ahhhh stop it! You make me feel all mushy and soft.... but I love you too and I’m a very lucky man to be able to call you mine.”

“Look at you, being a bluhsing mess... declaring your love for me. Cute.”

“I’m not cute, I am sexy. Now please shut up and focus on the movie.”

Jae:

dude, Jae literally screams boyfriend material

he would be an amazing byofriend

not too lovey dovey and he will roast your ass whenever there is an opportunity to do so

while Sungjin will give you cute nicknames like “love” and “babe”, Jae will just call you “dude”, “bro”, or “buddy”

but to be honest? that’s why a relationship with him would be so chill and refreshing, it’s different - in a good way

Jae is a sleepy boyfriend, so PDA is a regular occurence

he always holds you somehow

either your hands, or his body flung over yours

he is not too much into public kisses though

maybe he will kiss your cheek or your hand but that’s it

dates with him will be so fun as well

you guys will usually just play video games together

and even if you are not that much into gaming, you will be when you’re with Jae

sometimes, when you’re too tired, he will play and have you in his lap

nothing is more relaxing than leaning against him while he talks in his calm, deep and soothing voice

although he is a fun guy, he is super loving

he will brush your hair for you, tell you he loves you 90 times a day and he will constantly remind you of how beautiful you are

i feel like Jae also struggles with his confidence from time to time, so he knows how important reassurance is!

please make sure to remind him that you love him and that he is more than just enough!

“Dude, don’t look at yourself like that! You look like an absolute goddess! And I’m not just saying this because I’m whipped for you but because you truly are a blessing to my eyes. If someone dares to say otherwise, they obviously have never seen your sexy ass and need to get their eyes fixed. Sheesh, I really got lucky.”

“Oh Jae, I love you.”

“I love you too, sexy beast.”

“Please... you’re ruining the mood.”

Young K:

oh please, he is an awkward baby

super loving and so head over heels in love with you

but SO awkward

he is always a bit torn between being the lovey dovey boyfriend and being a badass guy

the boys tease him constantly, even worse than Sungjin

so sometimes you will get showered with kisses and physical touch

other times he will treat you like one of his brothers

which is fine by you, as long as you get to spend time with Brian

btw, you also tend to call him Brian, which he loves

it makes him feel like a kid in love

i mean he is in love and sometimes a kid - but you know what I mean

PDA is as I said, something he isn’t always too fond of but sometimes he loves it and will show everyone that you’re his

weirdly enough, Young K is obssessed with your butt

when you guys are cuddling

he tends to lay his head on your butt and just relax there

butt massages are also a thing

he loves you, a lot

no doubt

dates with him are always a surprise

one day you guys will just chill, maybe write songs in the studio

and on other days you will do something more active

like hiking, going to the arcade or just simply taking walks in nearby parks

he is a pretty confident guy and rarely gets jealous

so he does expect you to be the same

he wants you to feel confident cause he only loves you

there’s no doubt he would ever want anyone else

so when you get jealous, he will take it very personal

he loves you so much and you think he might be interessted in someone else?

“Babe, listen. I find this accusation very offensive. I love you so much, you are the only woman for me. Why would I be looking for someone else, when I have you? Aka everything I will ever need? Don’t let other peoples stares make you feel insecure. The only thing that matters is us.”

“I’m sorry Brian. It’s just... you could have anyone. Yet you chose me.”

“Because all I want is YOU. There’s no one else, you are my person! I love you.”

Wonpil:

omg he is literally the cutest

but probably also quite savage

idk i just find him extremely funny

i think he is more on the shy side

he isn’t too overly affectionate

so please do not expect him to show any type of PDA

not in public and not with the boys

you will get treated like another member

this might be hard sometimes

especially if you are super affectionate (like me)

but he will make sure to make you feel loved to cease all your doubts

actions speak louder than words

definitely something he lives by, no doubt

he will spoil you with nice and romantic dates

omg for dates he will go all out

he will cook, decorate the house with rose petals, light candles

the whole shabang

another thing i believe to be true is that he will treat you in a super gentle and respectful way (all the boys will, but just saying)

i think Wonpil is the type of boyfriend that will constantly ask for permission, no matter what he does and no matter how long you’ve been dating

he is way too scared to do something you will not be comfortable or okay with, so he will always make sure you are absolutely fine with everything he does

“baby? can I kiss you?”

“Wonpil, we’ve been dating for how long? 2 years? Yes, you can absolutely kiss me, no need to ask!”

“but what if you don’t want me to kiss you? and i just put my lips onto yours? I don’t want to force you.”

“Dude, as long as I am dating you, i want to kiss you 24/7! even when i’m mad, i will always crave your kisses.”

“Don’t dude me! You’re spending too much time with Jae... now please let me kiss you. Thank you.”

ugh I just love this guy

he is so cute and beautiful

and his vocals... imagine him singing you to sleep

i gotta go cry my eyes out now, cause I will never find myself a Wonpil 😭

Dowoon:

last but not least, our maknae!

he is literally so sweet and HILARIOUS

the vlog where the attempts to talk in English?

duuuude I died

so I feel like, althouhg he tends to be an awkward bean too, he will constantly make you laugh

he will make a fool of himself, diss the others, talk in English...

anything to make his baby happy!

he will also shower you with aegyo

i just feel it haha

PDA is also a no no for him, he rather saves all the love and affection for when you’re both at home

with affection i mean cuddles 24/7 in bed, kisses (even with morning breath cause nothing stops Dowoon’s love for you) and loads of head massages

ugh he is a sucker for head scratches

i can slo see him trying to teach you how to play the drums

he will even take days off, just to be able to teach you

let me tell you, he ADORES you

please do not play him

you mean the world to him and he appreciates you sticking with him throughout his crazy and hectic life

there will be moments where he just stares at you with literal heart eyes

he finds it hard to believe that he got this lucky

and please, do not ever try to make him jealous...

he will be the poutiest baby EVER

*pouts and waits for you to ask him what’s wrong*

*but you ignore him, so he starts making weird sounds*

“what? you big baby.”

“I’m hurt by you.”

“I’m so sorry that I breathe the same air as Jackson Wang. I will suffocate the next time he is close to me.”

“THANK YOU! it would be very much appreciated.”

#day6 #scenario #headcanon #sungjin #jae #young k #wonpil #dowoon #kpop

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rpbetter · 3 years

Note

Hi Vespertine. Sorry to add to the pile, I promise I will send in some writing related things to compensate later. I also misgendered that user in a comment by accident with she/her. I blocked them, but they still looked at my blog, and they made a post that said by using the wrong pronouns, which they thought was intentional and meant to hurt them, I purposefully called them a hysterical woman stereotype. Obviously that wasn't true. I was just going off a comment someone else made on my blog where they used she/her, and I thought I had to correct myself. It was a case where good intentions, even if I was not happy with the user's behavior or expected to talk to them again, I was still going to use the right pronouns, but my intentions were warped by someone with an agenda. I'm sorry to hear you're getting the same heat. I didn't use my rp blog to interact with the user or talk about them because I was sure something like this would happen, either by them or other people like that callout blog, and I think other people had the same idea. I dodged a bullet there, but I'm still paranoid. I'm paranoid I'll hear a notif and see my rp blog in a callout for this, because someone hunted it down, or a callout for trying to talk to the person who started all the drama. Nobody should be scared to talk about someone on their own blog. Nobody should be scared to talk openly, in general. Nobody should be called out for trying to talk with someone either. This culture of fear is so disturbing to me.

Hey there, Anon!

Oh, I would love that, but you totally don't have to, of course. Don't feel bad for adding on, I'm here for anything at all, and honestly, with the job I'm doing IRL right now, it's really hard for me to concentrate well enough on finishing any of the advice posts (at least, to be the quality y'all deserve). It's a hot topic, it's included so, so, terribly many people in the RPC. It's also one that's generating some great, needed conversations. So, it isn't like you're adding to anything bad, annoying or distracting me, or contributing to the inflammatory side of this.

Hell, it's got to be really nice for some of the people in messages I've received to see proof that they weren't alone in this experience. I can keep publishing the hate anons for exactly that reason, and I can promise people they aren't the only ones (in this or in any such horrible behavior), but it's different to see it coming from a third party! So, thank you for that.

Though, I am deeply sorry that you were treated to more than a ringside seat in this debacle.

It's not very encouraging to be thoughtful and respectful of other people when literally nothing you can say or do will result in anything other than more twisting of your words, and that's a big problem I have with this shit. Things like actual transphobia, intentional misgendering, actual infantalization and shit treatment of ND people, actual harassment, etc. etc. etc. matter. It's just more trivializing of real problems for the sake of blowing nonexistent bullshit up, and that is immensely disgusting to me. The fact that you damn well know someone out there has had the reaction to this behavior of, well, fuck you then, fuck trans people is really upsetting.

Like, yeah, let's be real, if you require social rewards to do the right thing, you have some problems lol but at the same time, you know who does require social rewards to develop themselves? Young people. And the RPC is largely comprised of people in their early twenties who, for a variety of possible reasons, are still at that point

Furthermore, no, it's not anyone's job to be good representation at all times, especially when that performance comes at a cost to themselves, but maybe don't go out of your way to be the person that is the necessary push in the wrong direction of someone's formative experience with people of your community. If it's costing you nothing to not clown on serious issues, but is costing the entire world another bigot for you to clown on serious issues, the choice should be a bit obvious here. Whenever you're in a safe place - physically, emotionally - and capable of that kind of logic, exercise it, damn.

It's definitely a better course of action than playing out skewed activism by vilifying innocent people, more worthy of one's effort than losing their collective shit over a very easy mistake. One that I'd say was even less avoidable in your case. AGAIN, how, exactly is anyone supposed to know this shit when they're blocked? When they aren't subverting the blocks they, themselves, put in place? I know for a fact none of them are looking at the information of the people they choose to try to drive out of the RPC, but everyone else is supposed to make zero reasonable assumptions, check and recheck blogs they have made an effort not to visit for good reason. Sounds absolutely reasonable and sane!

So, you know what? I'm going to be even more offensive here and talk for a moment about why these mistakes are reasonable.

When we see a post and reblog it, it's not unreasonable to assume that the OP had knowledge we didn't. Since we blocked the offending party, but they're discussing them. OP uses the incorrect pronouns, we end using the incorrect pronouns as well. This is not malicious intent. It isn't intentional at all, it's just having a discussion. A discussion that wouldn't have even transpired if they hadn't taken it upon themselves to (what a coincidence) take personal issue with a RPer they repeatedly took out of context and decided to shame for it, before proceeding to get an even bigger stick and pot.

When we decide to block a blog, it's our responsibility to stay off of it. Not go looking at it for any reason. That is now off-limits. When someone blocks us, it's also our responsibility to respect that decision, no matter how outrageous it was, no matter what we might need to verify. That's the issue with blocking when we don't exploit how easy it is to get around blocking on tumblr; we've cut ourselves off from any further meaningful communication, including passive communication like rules and posts. Kind of like how you cannot expect an apology to mean a damn thing when you've blocked everyone you harassed, then made that apology in a post on your blocked blog. Don't put up walls you expect people to see through, then get upset when they can't see through them.

As a community, the RPC is primarily afab. That's never a problem to bring up when someone wants to be angry about their female muse not getting equal attention and so on, but it's a problem to discuss any other time, about any other problem. Dealing with the things that we're socially raised to ascribe to as afab people is that problem. It's reflected in our behaviors, interests, and speech. We may not want to live in a gendered world, we may eschew that, but we were raised in a gendered world and it shows. One which has a lot of complications for being that, like almost everyone feeling safer around afab people by default of the All Men Are Bad, All Women Are Harmless bullshit.

We not only know that the RPC is primarily afab, we tend to assume comfort, especially in hostile situations, by assuming those pronouns in others.

And it so does not matter how much any of us like it, some people have more masculine or feminine tones. Even in text. That means neither that someone's gender identity should be disregarded nor that this text-based presentation is correct, but like every other unfair thing that exists, it's a thing. Like you, Anon, you genuinely come across in tone as primarily neutral, slight lean toward masculine. Even if I wasn't inclined to do so, not knowing you and all, I'd use they/them for you instinctively because that's what your speech is giving me. That isn't any more unreasonable than ascribing another set of pronouns based on the same information.

Oh yeah, I know, lurkers, the difference is that they/them is the appropriate choice when one does not know. I know that logically, but people aren't always operating like robots, weirdly enough. We default to a lot of instinctive behaviors, and we aren't always operating at the top rung of cognition either. Being human works like that, it's really that simple and not malicious if you're not reading that into it.

As we're all aware, it is being read into, and your experience is exactly why; you now feel worried every time you get a notif, you've been outed as a supposed transphobe, and while it is incredibly fortunate you stopped this from transpiring on your RP blog, it still transpired somewhere and has had a negative effect. If they find they correct thing or set of things, they can get so many more people to dogpile you over it. Get enough people to do that, make someone miserable enough, especially people who are already going through a hard enough time already, they'll leave.

It is a terroristic act, and it has the effect of all terroristic acts; people are afraid to exist outside of shifting bounds (that shifting is a part of the terrorism). They can't have an opinion, write any muse/topic they wish, be honest on their own blogs, support the "wrong" topics, muns, or blogs. Attacking people for a mistake, not allowing them to address it either, just furthers all of that. It's showing the community what happens when you aren't on the "right" side, even if that isn't even the case. They certainly turn on their own quickly enough.

So, of course, it's a culture of fear and it is disturbing as hell. No one has any right to make someone feel unsafe over fiction or a hobby or a difference of opinion. Everyone has the right to say whatever they want on their own blogs, to talk openly, and yes, to try to talk to others without feeling at risk.

Even if what someone says is genuinely unpleasant. This isn't the way one handles it. By all means, have a problem with something, have a problem with someone, but grow up and talk to them openly, without bringing everyone you can dredge up to join in. I have no issue with people arguing, I have an issue with bullying. If it's your whole goal to harass people without consequences to the end result of deactivation and lockstep behavior from everyone else, that's what you're doing, folks. Bullying.

If you can't win an argument, especially one your own ass began, in any other way than this, you're not engaging in an argument.

#vespertine #answered #anonymous #callout culture #rp harassment

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onthevirgeofdestruction · 4 years

Link

Dreaming While I Wake

Sanders Sides Foster Care AU - Roman-centric Angst & Hurt/Comfort & Abuse Recovery

Roman tries to be upbeat and hopeful despite all the shit that’s happened to him. And a lot of shit has. Luckily, his new foster home is with two literal rays of sunshine (and a sarcastic asshole).

Words: 3,354 Warnings: Spoilers and I’d consider checking them. Characters: Roman, Patton Universe: Dreaming While I Wake Genre: Power Angst

Chapter 20

chapter 1 for new readers - ffn mirror

“I’m so glad Mr. Hartley could find your brother and put us on the approved visitor list. It sounds like he had to pull a lot of strings to do it,” Patton flashed a smile quickly to Roman before looking back at the road. Roman fidgeted lightly with his hands and watched the road for a moment. He was still worried and was tired as shit for having to wake up early to drive out there for the visiting hours. Well, it was only a little early for the Sanders house but Roman still was the worst at sleeping. Especially when he knew he was going to finally see his brother the next day.

“Thanks again for being willing to drive me out,” Roman mumbled and curled into his jacket a bit. “You really don’t think he’ll be mad at me for not calling and stuff?” Roman asked nervously, glancing at Patton. Patton kept his eyes on the road.

“I think if you explain what happened he’ll probably understand,” Patton said plainly. That didn’t particularly inspire confidence in Roman. He side-eyed Patton for a moment, but Patton added nothing else.

“Hm, I’m hearing a maybe,” Roman said seriously, tugging at his seat belt to shift it away from his cracked rib again.

“Well, I can’t see everything, kiddo,” Patton smiled knowingly for someone saying he didn’t know. “But he’s your brother, and that didn’t go away with distance,” Roman hummed, not really agreeing or disagreeing. He wanted to believe Remus wouldn’t hate him. He just also had a ‘wildly miscalibrated’ sense of whether or not people hate him, according to Thomas. But even if his sense is off, it was a loud one and he didn’t know how to ignore it. Roman yawned and leaned back the seat a little, watching the road again.

“I know this is early for you. I can put the radio on classical or something and you can take a nap. The weekend visiting hours are offensively short and early,” Patton muttered bitterly. “You should be able to visit your kids and siblings all day on the weekend, not between 8 and 10 am. Who do they think they are? The state prison has better visiting hours!” Patton started ranting in frustration.

“I’m a 15-year-old felon, I can’t answer these questions,” Roman rubbed his head. It kind of hurt from Pat’s rambling. Or the lack of sleep. Or the knowledge there will be guards there. Or the roiling fear in him that Remus hated him now, and that he had every right to as someone in juvie while Roman had such a nice place to stay. Maybe there were lots of reasons his head could hurt.

“You’re not a felon, kiddo,” Patton furrowed his eyebrows, looking miffed. Roman just crossed his arms lightly and raised his eyebrow. “Well, not a convicted felon, anyway,” Patton trailed off slightly. “Let’s not bring up the whole drug trafficking thing at the JDC,” Patton chuckled nervously, shooting a look at Roman.

“Yeah, I definitely tell everybody about my crimes,” Roman’s tone was dripping with sarcasm as he rolled his eyes. “Thomas says I thought I was dead. That’s basically the only circumstance I ever planned to tell anyone,” Roman huffed angrily, though it was entirely at himself for letting it slip. He really didn’t like anybody knowing about it. Though Virgil was chill about it. At least that was something. Patton and Thomas, on the other hand? Roman wasn’t sure they had chill anymore.

“I suppose we should avoid panic attacks, then,” Patton said, sounding concerned and tapping his steering wheel with his fingers as he steered.

“Sure, I’ll turn off the panic switch,” Roman flipped his hand and mimed toggling a switch sarcastically. He looked out the passenger window, gripping his seatbelt in his hands both as something grounding but to keep it off his ribs again.

“Young man, I understand you’re scared and tired, but maybe turn down the sarcasm a notch,” Patton said seriously. Roman huffed indignantly, but sighed and dropped his arms after a moment.

“Sorry,” Roman mumbled and fiddled with his jeans.

“I don’t think marijuana charges should be a thing in the first place, by the way. I don’t think that in a just world you’d be a felon,” Patton said, consolingly. Roman winced and looked to Patton for a moment, deciding if he should correct him or not.

“You like honesty, right?” Roman sighed, looking over to Patton nervously. He may as well get this over with.

“Yes, I do! But I don’t like the sound of that question. Not in the context of this conversation, anyway,” Patton said nervously and gripped the steering wheel as if to brace himself.

“I guess because it’s hard to picture a teenager dealing anything harder than weed, or something? But there’s a reason I said drugs. It was just weed… at first. It… didn’t stay that way. Expenses went up. And it went from some very nice engineers who grew it outside of town to real mafia-type drug suppliers. That’s how the whole having guns pointed at me thing happened. We were kind of in over our heads, honestly. I was just making deliveries to white guys in flip-flops who’d tip well if I did magic tricks for them, other than visiting the engineers. It wasn’t that bad,” Roman swallowed. “Then it got worse, and I had to carry a gun just to protect myself and… it just wasn’t good. I’d still be a felon in a more just world,” Roman confessed quietly.

“You didn’t have to use the gun, did you, kiddo?” Patton asked, sounding deeply troubled and gripping the steering wheel enough to make his knuckles pale.

Roman held himself and swallowed heavily. “Can we not talk about this?” Roman mumbled, hating to have to remember this part. Hating himself for ever having to do it. Roman gripped his seatbelt again, unable to deal and trying to focus on literally anything else. Like the texture of the seat-belt strap and how it was weirdly sharp feeling or the signs through the window.

“I think we might need to,” Patton said carefully, but he was clearly holding back something by the expression on his face.

“First shot’s a warning shot. Second shot was to the legs,” Roman muttered. “That’s… that’s all I’m willing to say about it,” Roman said weakly, trying his damnedest not to remember.

“I suppose it’s a good thing you’re seeing a psychiatrist,” Patton swallowed. “I’m impressed at how strong you are to carry this guilt for so long, champ. At least you never intended to hurt anybody, right?” Patton said as evenly as Roman assumed as he could manage. He didn’t sound so sure that Roman never wanted to, though, and Roman felt like a dirtbag for it.

“No, I didn’t wake up thinking ‘I’m going to shoot some guy today’,” Roman said sarcastically. “I already know I’m not a good person. You don’t have to try to make excuses for me,” He added weakly and stared at his feet as the seatbelt cut into his hands from twisting it so tightly.

“Good and bad are a lot more complex than that. I know this stuff makes me uncomfortable, but your choices now are what matter. Not your choices when you had nothing but ultimatums in your life. It doesn’t sound like you wanted to make those choices, either,” Patton said thoughtfully, sounding resolute despite the shakiness in his voice.

“Learning to shoot a gun was cool,” Roman supplied weakly. There were things he liked that he knew he shouldn’t have. He enjoyed learning new stuff. He liked people cheering when he did sleight-of-hand tricks. He liked having enough money to buy his own clothes and pick what he ate and buy his own things. He liked some of the stoners. They were funny. He even liked Jet. “Jet’s a d-bag in high-pressure situations, but he was pretty chill most of the time. We hung out often, even though he’s years older than me. I didn’t hate all of it,” Roman admitted, loosening up on the seatbelt a bit.

Jet was the only person who knew, other than repeat customer stoners. But even they didn’t know it was Roman. There was one who invited him in to play Assassin’s Creed and Mortal Kombat, who saw him without the mask. Not that Roman would admit to playing those to Patton. Roman was certain that guy was just lonely and enjoyed talking to someone and probably thought Roman was older than he was. He was nice either way. He even let Roman stay with him one night to avoid a bad situation at home. There were plenty of things Roman liked about it that he knew he shouldn’t have.

“Finding joy when you’re in a terrible situation is okay and also doesn’t make you a bad person. It still just means you were trying to survive,” Patton reminded him. “You could have turned out much worse if you didn’t find ways to be happy with access to a gun and drugs. Well, you could have turned out much worse with any of those factors,” Patton said, sounding kind of strangely impressed.

“Yeah, I hope Jet’s okay,” Roman admitted quietly and looked back out the passenger window again.

“I hope he found a home that helped him out, too. But I am still proud of you for turning out so… okay, despite everything,” Patton offered, sounding genuinely pleased. Was that supposed to make sense?

“You and Thomas have done nothing but say I’m not okay since I got here,” Roman scoffed as he objected and rolled his eyes.

“Well, we had to re-evaluate where the bar was with new information. You’re okay, in a sense, for somebody in the situations you’ve been in… seeing as you don’t have a drug habit and are, well, you’re here. You still have to see the psychiatrist, though. You’re not okay in another sense,” Patton said resolutely.

“That’s so confusing,” Roman groaned and gestured in frustration. “Mr. Hartley said there’s no way to stop the state from having access to my medical records,” Roman pouted angrily. “You know I don’t want that.”

“We’re going to figure out the problems as they come. But Thomas and I aren’t equipped to help you. We will continue to be there for you and happy to assist, but you have lots of things that you need professional help to break down and rebuild into something healthier and more sustainable. For one, Thomas is really freaked out about you scratching at yourself when you panic. We don’t know how to stop that, and you can’t keep living life like that. It’s not safe or healthy,” Patton said firmly with a glance towards Roman.

“I can just wear gloves all the time like a movie villain,” Roman rolled his eyes. Patton was letting him leave them off for now, but they were in Roman’s pocket in case Patton changed his mind.

“Roman, it’s a temporary solution that you clearly don’t enjoy,” Patton said, shaking his head.

“I don’t like the reminder,” Roman sighed. “And I’m not wearing them at school. I’d get harassed non-stop,” Roman grumbled. “What if I pull a Virgil and refuse to see the psychiatrist?” Roman said hopefully, but it came out more aggressively than intended.

“We’re signing up Virgil for to talk to a psychiatrist online. We realize now that it’s dangerous to keep waiting for you two to want it for yourselves. Just because Virgil hasn’t had non-car related panic attacks we’ve seen doesn’t mean he’s not quietly at-risk while he sits alone in his room. He has trouble connecting to people, and we realize that it’s more dangerous to let go unchecked than we thought. We thought it just meant he couldn’t be around cars. We didn’t know there was a whole slew of other things that might be making his life harder,” Patton explained and used that serious parent tone.

“Thomas said that he had nine out of the fifteen things the ER doctor mentioned, and that’s without him talking to us. It will take some time to get him to talk to somebody, so setting up appointments now, even if doesn’t respond in earnest right away, is better than putting it off and it takes even longer. You boys might even need to be on some medications,” Patton said, sounding sympathetic despite the fact they were forcing this on him.

“I don’t want to go on meds,” Roman said angrily, refusing to meet his eyes and watching the rearview mirror.

“I’m on anti-depressants and Thomas is on anti-anxiety medications. There’s no shame in it. They seem scary at first, and they can be when you’re adjusting to them, but they’re there to improve your life and make it easier. It’s just like I have to take an allergy pill every day to treat cats. I could just suffer through the stuffy nose and watery eyes, but I don’t have to,” Patton admitted.

“Why in the world did you become a vet if you’re allergic to cats?” Roman asked incredulously.

“They’re just so fluffy! It’s not a severe allergy,” Patton cooed. “But seriously kiddo, kinda hoping to die quietly isn’t healthy. It might mean you have a chemical imbalance and need medical intervention so you don’t take risks since you don’t care if you live or die,” Patton said more seriously, looking sad.

“I care if I live,” Roman drawled defensively. “I wouldn’t have done anything I did to protect myself in the past if I didn’t care if I lived or not,” Roman spat bitterly, not able to even look at Patton.

“But you think things would be easier if you didn’t have to live anymore, right? That it would be nice if you just didn’t wake up one day? Maybe a coma sounds nice? Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if you died in a freak accident?” Patton insinuated and Roman bit his tongue with a frustrated exhale through his nose. “I told you kiddo, I’m on anti-depressants. I’m not in your exact same boat, but I do know a little about what you’re going through. You’re very high energy for somebody with depression, but I’m not a people doctor and there’s probably more going on than we see. Which is another excellent reason to get you properly diagnosed. So we can get you the right tools to cope and recovery for everything we know and don’t know you have,” Roman hated that this all started to make sense. He still didn’t want to do any of it. The thought terrified him. But he wished it didn’t make sense, still.

“You kinda get it, right? Is it… is it normal to still believe I’m okay and don’t need help?” Roman asked quietly.

“I think anybody who gets shut down when they ask for help long enough will eventually convince themselves they’re okay and fine on their own just to cope. But I also think both you and I know you’re not okay on some level and your brain’s just trying to play catch up with that fact since you’ve had to be ‘okay’ for so long,” Patton suggested kindly, but it still kind of hurt to hear. Roman curled in on himself slightly. Another thing he wished didn’t make sense.

“Try to sit up straight, Roman, your rib needs room to heal. I know it feels counter-intuitive when you feel vulnerable,” Roman wanted to object to being vulnerable, but he tried to straighten out, anyway. Maybe he was feeling vulnerable and not bitter. It sort of seemed like he’d have to re-learn some feelings from the ground up because he was doing them wrong.

“So, we’re almost there. Do you want to discuss what you will say to him to explain what happened?” Patton suggested genially. Roman considered it before shaking his head slowly.

“No, I’m not the best at following plans or even saying the things I mean to say. There’s not much of a point to that,” Roman sighed. “I’m just going to… try,” Roman said, kind of wishing he had something better to say. Or some way to convince Remus to forgive him. Or something better to give him. Just… he wished for lots of things.

“That’s all we can do sometimes,” Patton said brightly. It was weird how he could flip his moods like that. Roman still felt kind of off from their conversation. Maybe Patton was just good at hiding things. “Sorry that I accidentally kept you up instead of letting you nap on the way over,” Patton apologized.

“I’m probably too nervous about seeing Remus again to have taken a nap either way. I keep thinking I’m not going to recognize him for some reason. Or he won’t recognize me. But that doesn’t make any sense. And it’s not the only completely unreasonable thing going through my head,” Roman admitted sheepishly.

“It’s not unreasonable that he’d look different, kiddo, it’s been 4 years,” Patton said softly.

“What are you talking about?” Roman asked incredulously, looking to Patton and furrowing his eyebrows.

“Four years is a long time! You’ve both done lots of growing, I’m sure,” Patton possibly attempted to explain. What the hell was he talking about? Holy shit, did Patton not know? Oh, he had to see Patton’s face when he found out. Roman wasn’t saying a damn thing.

“Still. I just don’t think I would have rested well,” Roman said dismissively. He at least had something to look forward to. Remus used to love this kind of thing, too, so maybe Remus would laugh, and that would be worth it.

“All right, we need to leave our personal effects in the car according to the website. Put your phone, keys, and wallet in the glove box if you have any of them,” Patton said. Roman shifted slightly to extract his stuff while Patton pulled into the parking lot. Roman closed his things into the glove box and looked around the lot. God, this place was… depressing. It’s a giant concrete box, and it feels… wrong. Haunted, maybe. Just bad. Patton slipped his phone in the glove box and locked it before they both got out of the car.

Patton had to show his ID, and it took a bit of arguing, but they managed to find him and Roman on the approved visitor list after about 10 minutes. It was ridiculous that Roman wasn’t allowed to see his own brother under normal circumstances. Patton was right about that. They don’t have parents for Roman to come in with. Getting Patton and Roman on the approved list was probably the social worker equivalent of an act of god. Roman would have to thank him properly when he saw him next month. Maybe Patton would let him bake him cookies or something. Roman waited on one of the few chairs in the lobby until they were finally able to go through x-ray and security. They weren’t allowed to bring much to him, but Patton brought a bag of chocolates for Remus, which was nice.

The security guard brought them to a weird steel and concrete cafeteria-looking room, where they picked a table and were told to wait while they fetched Remus. Roman’s foot started tapping, and that hurt like a mother fuck, so he managed to move his nervous energy to drum on the table with his fingers. Patton tolerated the noise and offered him a soft smile every time he looked nervously to Patton as they waited. This part made Roman so restless it physically hurt. The guards made him nervous enough, but seeing his brother for the first time in 4 years was a whole new level. He fought to keep himself as level as he could with the sheer joy from the knowledge that at least, after all this time, he’d finally get to see Remus again.

Personal Taglist: @bunny222 @elizabutgayer @prinxietyforever @kanene-yaaay-o-retorno @the-sympathetic-villain @croftersjam15 @ollyollyoxinfree

the taglist repository:

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#tsss #sanders sides #tsss fanfiction #sanders sides fanfiction #tsss fanfic #ayri writes #dreaming while I wake #angst #tw guns #tw drugs #tw suicidal ideation #death mention #tw severe depression #ts roman #roman angst #ts roman angst #chapter fic #fanfiction #ts patton

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eternaljouska · 4 years

Note

"sunflower garden" and joshua for the title request thing 🌻💐💕 thanku!!

∆∆∆∆∆ Title Request 2/6 ∆∆∆∆∆

w/c: 4.3k

a/n: I am so so sorry this took a whole eon to finish. Thank you so much for requesting and waiting for this~~ I hope this is satisfactory. Also, I don’t know why this is so long when my plot is, again, questionable lololol

Sunflower is just a little price for such as little happiness. It’s gaseous, happiness. You can smell it. Before it’s gone with the wind just like that. But it’s worth it.

You wonder what would happen if you’re to give out diamond instead. Would people look at you crazy? Lord, even with the obnoxious yellow-orange flowers in your hands, people already look at you crazy.

You are out for a walk near the Han River—it’s a walk for today, not a run, not biking, but a walk—handing out one sunflower for anyone you deem needs some cheering up. There’s a little plastic tag attached to each flower; you’d take your time to write a short encouragement to hide inside it whenever you wait for the florist assistant to prepare your regular. And then you’d go on your way, hunting for gloomy people on your stroll. But that’s it, as long as the stock is still available.

There are people who’d be weirded out by your sudden involvement in their sweet miserable life. No offense. Really. You think all lives are just the same: sweet and simultaneously, miserable. Sometimes, not even sweet at all. But there are others who’d be pleasantly surprised.

There was this one kid from two weeks ago. She had cried, you didn’t know why, but you swept in anyway with your sun in the smiling flowers—please, excuse the poor attempt at replacing a knight in the shining armor. You had continued your pilgrimage after you wiped her tears dry and made sure that she smiled. But when you’re about to start on your religious self-reflection on the bridge, facing the holy sunset of the Han River, someone tugged at the hem of your baby blue sundress.

It was the little girl.

She stood in front of you, a bright smile challenging the sun behind you and a fresh baby breath posy inside both of her tiny palms. You fell on your knees and pulled her in a hug. Lord, you needed a hug. Before you pulled away, you noticed a shadow of a man standing a few feet away under the shade. It must’ve been her father, you’d thought and couldn’t help but think that sunflower needed to cost a lot more than it was.

That was the one time you’d felt the magic at its strongest. And just like humans did, you craved for more.

This kind of outing usually ends with you donating some water to the Han River. But that day, it didn’t. After the little girl ran towards the man, you’d turned around to face the sun with teary eyes. But you didn’t cry. You felt happy. And happiness was every drop of water swimming in the river in front of you. You just stood there, until it swallowed whole the dying sun.

However, today, you cry.

It’s not an ugly cry. People would think you’re a lunatic if they saw you like that. It’s just water, tears, streaming down your eyes and into the river. Your gaze follows the infinitesimal droplet giving in to gravity. You smile. You always think that you’re such a bad person. But now you feel like the best altruist, donating water for the Han River.

Lord, what a joke.

You see your tears falling to your arms hanging from the rail and then continuing their journey somewhere you can’t keep your eyes on. They rarely even fall into the river, just a very insignificant amount does. And now you’re acting as if at least a quarter of Han River is your tears.

You wish everyone was that little girl. Or her father. You wish that after almost a year doing the same set of activities would make people recognize you and finally return the hospitality with a simple hi or a ghost of an acknowledging smile. No one besides the people from the flower shop does. And as you cry, you think about why nobody’s ever walked to you to ask the reason for your tears.

Maybe they know not to meddle in such a sacred act of crying. Or maybe after almost a year, they know to let you be because you’ll stop eventually and go home. Until the day comes again for you to repeat the habit.

Maybe you should actually change sunflower with diamonds hanging from your neck and circling every inch of your arms, spending your ten-minute walk trying to blind everybody’s eyes. Maybe only that way would people see you. Or maybe not, since they’d be even more blinded to see.

You chuckle at the image of you with a pair of shiny sunglasses copying a supermodel, strutting with hands spread out to make an exhibition out of the diamonds in your possession. You’d lower the sunglasses when people look and throw one random bracelet their way and a necklace to the others. You swear you’re such a funny person, too bad nobody would stick around long enough for that side to start emerging. But then when your laughter dies, you feel pathetic. Have you been crying here because you want someone to notice? What an attention seeker.

And Joshua would have said otherwise and defended you—like he usually has—if only he hadn’t been caught completely off guard.

Joshua’s afternoon exercise is cycling from his neighborhood, around the Han River, and back home, the route only interrupted by a quick stop in his favorite smoothie shop. He rarely brings his friend with him because most of the time, they’ll very likely ruin his zen. They’d start an unnecessary race that messes with his pace and force him to pay for their smoothies and even have the nerve to blame him for the sweat their own bodies produce.

Today, he’s accompanied by Seungcheol and Soonyoung, both of which are clingy—as hell. And the amount of stress he got from his unwise decision was enough to last him half a lifetime. They had argued about who had the largest shadow—very important, he knows—and when Joshua pedaled faster to get ahead of them both, the disaster began.

Soonyoung was the first to realize his attempt to escape, and so he said, “See, Shua can’t take being close to you any longer. I know he only likes me.”

The guy reached his right in no time and Seungcheol, being the mature one that he is, raced him and singsong, “He can only tolerate you because I’m here, though.”

So that’s how Joshua wished a truck would kindly and gently run them over.

But that much stress he could handle. The additional dose they added when they started looking at you weirdly, he couldn’t.

Joshua walked out of the smoothie shop later than usual. All because his highly intelligent friends couldn’t notice the urgency of his tapping foot, the urgency of wanting to be in the right moment and in the right place. He already didn’t see you in his round about the Han River. There’s no way he’d miss you on the bridge. So he did what he knew would raise Seungcheol and Soonyoung’s interest: betting in a race.

Once they all reached the finish line, which obviously was picked by Joshua for a specific reason, Seungcheol and Soonyoung immediately noticed you and wondered aloud as to why you’re crying in front of the bridge. Soonyoung squeaked and almost shouted at you, thinking that you’re planning to jump over the bridge.

It was a fair thought. Joshua was like that the first time he saw you. He’d hesitated to say something, so he waited. He waited with bated breath until the sun completely set and you wiped your face with your hands and left. You rode a lemon-colored bike that matched the yellow of the sunflowers in your hands. You had caught him following you home, and Joshua could only stutter out his explanation. But in the end, when the shadows of worry cleared out of your eyes, you smiled instead. And with a thank you, you gift him the last of your sunflowers.

Joshua doesn’t see your bike anywhere near you, and that fact is somehow unsettling. He has come every weekend, sometimes early enough to witness you doing your sunflower patrol, to know that you only leave your bike home when you do your run. And you doing your run means that your day is worse than usual.

So today is one of those days.

And on those days, he, more than anything, wants to give you back all the sunflowers in the world.

But his friends, flanking him, are watching you with pity in their eyes. The balloon-seller who stopped Soonyoung from shouting for you earlier had told them to let you be, saying that you’ve been here a lot and perhaps just like the attention people give. It had made Joshua wondered for a split second, just how many people in the park recognize you. But it was the least of his priority. It’s the middle-aged man’s remark and Seungcheol’s question that came after he left.

She’s attention seeker or something?

Joshua would’ve defended you against the balloon seller’s comment and his friend’s question any day if it’s not for the fact that he’s too late—if it’s not for the fact that you’ve been listening to the exchange all along.

You meet Joshua’s dark orbs and grasp the worry swarming within them. It’s almost like the first time that you saw him, when you confronted him for following you home. Only back then, his worry was slightly muted by a hint of curiosity. And now, listening to the conversation of the men around him, you think you have an idea as to why he’s looking at you like he’s ready to throw himself under a bus.

The words that his friends said didn’t hit the mark, not after you just admitted it to yourself earlier, admitted that you indeed want the attention, just not the one that people have been giving you—if they even spare you any. You know that Joshua feels horrible about his friend’s question or the seller’s comments. Or maybe because of the fact that you heard them, you can never know.

You’ve seen him around on the weekends, Joshua. You’ve seen hovering around the bridge, watching you—or the sunset. And sometimes he might follow you to your neighborhood. You know you should be worried, but after that first meeting, you’ve accepted his presence in your periphery. If only he would move a little bit to your line of vision.

Joshua never said hi. He never uttered any more word after he left with your sunflower that first night. And he blames his insurmountable stupidity for that. He likes to conjure up his ideal next meeting with you, the perfect words, the majestic setting. There would be no more of that, he’s afraid. His friends have ruined it. You had met his stare for long seconds before you turned around and left for the direction of your neighborhood. And Joshua hadn’t been able to follow you because of his hellish friends. They finally noticed that his expression was made up of not only of exhaustion only when they invited him to Wonwoo’s house for games.

Joshua brushed them off, but they knew. As hellish as they were, they’re still his friends. So he told them about you. Their reaction at the end of his story, the immense guilt written in the line of their faces, was a little victory for him. But then they forced him to go to where you live and send their apology before they do it themselves since she doesn’t know them yet.

And so here he is, standing in front of a house approximately a third of his in size, but of which small lawn is in much better care than his wider one. He smiles at the variety of flowers that it has, imagining you crouching in front of each one and giving them such meticulous attention. He realizes it then that he knows nothing about you other than your love for flowers. You must have spent a lot of money on flowers alone, but the house in front of him gives him the impression that you come from a more humble family. Do you work? Or are you still in school? Do you live with your parents at all? Are they still present? Suddenly, the prospect of talking to you, trying to draw an explanation of your daily ritual, seems very absurd for him, for someone who has no clue of who you are. It seems beyond personal. It seems out of the line.

Joshua grunts and knocks his head to the solid surface in front of him and let it stay there only to realize five seconds too late just what it was that he has done. He heard the running steps first and then suddenly you’re in front of him.

Joshua’s eyes are blown wide in surprise as he takes a few scurrying steps backward.

You still have your face on the window, flipping the curtain a little bit to identify the person outside your door, but Joshua is stupefied. You were so close to him, so close that if the window isn’t there, his lips probably have had brushed against your temple. This is so not the moment for him to think about such a thing, not when he could’ve broken your glass window with his head bump. Not when you’re standing on the doorway, eyes equally wide, with your almost translucent long white nightdress.

He cleared his throat. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to—“

“Is this about your friends?” In the span of a couple of seconds, you have closed the door behind you and stood less than three feet away from him. You’re hugging yourself. The night air must be cold for you in your nightdress, and Joshua feels a knot forming in his stomach. He can’t imagine you chose to sacrifice the warmth of your house as to not let him inside is a good sign. But after he let it settled, he knows it’s the sensible option. He would be wary if you had let him in that easily, he’s still a stranger after all.

And to be frank, if you had the time to consider your action, you don’t know what choice you would choose. You had been hiding under your blanket, going over the conversation you heard and kept listening to a couple of hours earlier when there’s a glaring sound coming from outside. You had jumped out of your bed and ran to your window to see, but you weren’t prepared for the sight in front of you. It took you a fraction of seconds to put the name into its face, and without being completely aware of what you did, you had opened the door and walked a few steps towards Joshua.

He scans your stance, takes a short glance towards your house, and then stares back at you, which makes you feel suddenly conscious of how you present yourself in front of him. “Say it,” you demand, placing more force on your voice than necessary.

“I’m, I’m sorry. They’re sorry. They wanted me to say it because they don’t know how to do it. Because you don’t know them.”—he clears his throat again—“Not that we know each other, but you know, I’m more, um, familiar with you, you know. But they want to say sorry too, I mean, I come so that you can meet them, that is, if you want.” You hear him grumbles, probably scolding himself for the quality of the words coming out of his mouth, not that you think they are bad.

“Hm,” you mumble noncommittally before you continue, “It’s okay. You don’t have to feel sorry.”

“But—“

“Their words missed the mark. I do want attention. That doesn’t make it right, but… I was thinking about their words, and, um, they brought out some truth I’ve been struggling with. So it’s okay, I guess.”

Joshua doesn’t answer. He doesn’t know how to, so he just looks at you, struggling to contain the questions building up inside of him. He wants you to share that truth. He wants to know more about your sunflower patrol, but he’s not certain you would tell him even if he begs you. Lord, he wants to know. Why had you forgiven his friends’ words so easily? Why had you accepted them? He was about to burst when you finally slice the thick silence and blurt out, “You never said hi.”

Joshua blinks. And he can feel his whole body burns red with the shame washing over him. All the whys he’s asking is now turned inward. Why, why hadn’t he said something? Why hadn’t he come to you? What’s his reason? His excuse?

When he finds the answer, he let out a soft scoff. “Because I’m afraid. Because I’m a coward.”

He would never guess that you could deviate so far from his expectation, but you did. You smile and whisper, strangely proudly, “And I’m an attention-seeker.” He doesn’t know why, but that brings out a smile out of him also. But then you turn around and walk towards your house, to quickly for him to register. His smile was almost replaced by panic when you say, “It’s cold. Let’s talk inside.”

She brews him a cup of hot chamomile tea, and Joshua has the sure knowledge that the warmth within him comes not from that tea or the four walls encircling him. “I, um, I’m sorry. I was afraid you’d think of me strangely if I walked to you when you, um, you know, when you were crying on the bridge.” She laughs at that, and the sound of it warms him even more.

“And yet you follow me home after,” she taunts. Joshua’s eyes grow wide again, he always makes sure to keep his distance and to bike away once you enter your neighborhood. He’s never followed you home completely like that first night he saw you. “Don’t worry. After that first night, I don’t mind your presence anymore. But I do wish you’d just come to me and offer your company directly.”

“I’m sorry, I’m just—“

“Stop saying sorry or I’ll kick you out of my house.” Ah, right, your house. He hasn’t had the chance to look around with his nerve eating up him. But this house… The white wall opposite of the window, the wall in front of him, has considerable amount of picture frames: some containing real pictures, some with dried flowers inside. So you live alone, he concludes. The sound of a cleared throat snaps him out of his attempt to learn more about you by observing your home, and Joshua wishes he could be clever enough to try a more subtle method.

“I wanted them to be diamonds, you see,” you start, but Joshua has no clue of what you’re trying to say. “The sunflowers. I might not seem like it, but I have the money to do so. But that would attract the wrong kind of attention. Even sunflowers already did so.”

Joshua’s heart races at the realization of the direction this conversation is going. You’ll let him know. You’ll let him know. He bites his lips to prevent himself from saying stupid things that will make you stop telling him your story.

“When you do something good, is it so wrong that you wish a little something in return? I just want to be that unexpected kindness someone’s hoping to make their day better, you know, like when you have such a bad day, and the smile of the bus driver acknowledging you is like the greatest present you’ve received in your life? I can’t hope people stop and compliment me every time I have a bad day to better my mood. I used to go to this park back then when I was a child. They have a small section dedicated for sunflowers. I remember how happy I always was when I visited the park. So I tried one day, giving out flowers, sunflowers, to stranger on the street. And I keep doing it. Because the surprise on their faces, their smiles, they make me feel good about myself. Wow, I realize it now. Saying things out loud really makes a difference, huh?”

“W-what?” Joshua stutters out, caught off guard once again. “It’s not—It’s not bad that you do it to make yourself happier. It may sound self-centered, but everyone is all about themselves first anyway, right? That’s how it supposed to be. You take care of yourself. And what you do while doing so, it makes other people happy also. So that’s good, right?”

You let out a single laugh. “You think so? I just— the people who are there a lot, they say things that make me feel bad about myself. After hours of going around with flowers, I’d hear them say those things and the happiness just gone. It becomes a burden, somehow, I don’t know.”

Joshua doesn’t know what to say, and never in his life before does he feel more useless than he does at this moment. That is, until he remembers what he shoved inside his pocket before he rode his bicycle to your house. He jerks into movement and he can feel your apt attention on him. He reaches into his pocket, takes the small object out, and offers it to you.

You accept the small pin from his hand. It’s a sunflower pin with eyes and a curving lines on its face and some words engraved on the bottom part of it. I am a smiling flower, it says. It’s so pretty, so so pretty even with tears starting to blur your vision. “I’m not good with words. I’m always scared of saying the wrong words, so I resort to not saying anything,” Joshua says, his hand reaching for the back of his neck now. “When I saw that pin, you came to my mind, so yeah… Um, I know not everyone appreciates flowers, but I know you do. You… I think you’re like a smiling flower, so I hope that more than anyone, you can appreciate yourself, like you do flowers.”

You’re stunned, still looking down at the pin, but with tears clearly lining your eyes. You look up and smile at him. You notice his surprise at the sight of your tears, but you pay it no heed. You rise from your seat and he follows suit in reflex, but that action allows you more freedom to do what you want to do next.

Joshua believes he’s already dead when you wrap your arms around him, but his thundering heart crushes that belief. It’s not his current main problem, though. His ultimate problem now is where he’s supposed to put his own hands, which are now limp on his side. He raises them slowly only to find that you already let him go. “Thank you,” you whisper.

“Oh? Yes, no problem,” he answers instantly. His heart still won’t calm down, but that’s not what bothers him at the moment. He knows it’s coming. Goodbye. It’s coming any time now. And he’s not ready. He doesn’t know if he’d have the courage to talk to you again if he has to say goodbye now. Quick. Think of something. “Oh!”

“Oh?”

“The, um, the meeting with my friends? Can you, would you want to do that?”

“Ah, that,” you chuckle softly, “of course.”

Both of you share a few moments of silence until you chuckle again, “Goodnight, um…”

“Joshua,” he says. In all honesty, you already know his name, but you refuse to present yourself like a creep that you’d already know his name, in case he doesn’t know yours yet. You walk him to your door and repeat what you said, “Goodnight, Joshua.”

“Goodnight…”

“Y/n.”

“Y/n,” he speaks your name as if it’s the first time he’d heard it, and it may be so, for you don’t think even the sellers around the Han River know your name. You don’t have friends that would holler your name like crazy as Joshua’s friends, that’s why, although you imagine that that certain friends would meet you soon enough for their said apology.

Just before you close your door on him—knowing that he would not go until you do so—you call him, “Hey, Joshua.”

“Hmm?”

“You’re not as cowardice as you think you are, you know. I’ve seen you defending me against people’s comments in the park.” His eyes widen again, and you decide that is one of the cutest things you’ve ever seen. When it’s apparent that he’s handled the surprise of you knowing his small act, you say your request, “Talk to me tomorrow?”

There, there, his eyes grow even wider, and you chuckle. “Make sure that you do. Be careful on your way home. Goodnight.”

“Y/n, wait.” The closing door stops moving and you open it a little bit more to let your head out. “I know this place. The, um, the owner is my mom’s friend. She loves flowers too, has her own garden and all. But only recently did she become obsessed with sunflowers. You know, one day her youngest daughter brought a sunflower home, and she suddenly felt this renewed and expanse fondness of sunflowers.” Joshua’s stare flickers upward and finally notice the eyebrow you raised at him.

Your point? You seem to say.

“My point is, I want to take you there. I can ask for her permission and take you there,” he finishes with a long exhale.

“For the meeting with your friends?” you ask.

“No! I mean, no,” he clears his throat, “No, for, um, our talk, tomorrow. I’m going to make sure that I do.”

He smiles at the end of his sentence, and you return it. “Can we bike there?”

“It’s pretty close, yeah.”

“Alright, then. Pick me up anytime.” You bite your lower lip to stop yourself from laughing and for the third time tonight, you half-whispers, “Goodnight, Joshua.”

“It is,” Joshua murmurs after you closed your door, his smile bigger than the one on the sunflower pin’s face. “It is a good night indeed.”

#thesvttown #joshua hong #hong jisoo fluff #joshua fluff #seventeen fluff #hong jisoo #jisoo fluff #fluff #joshua hong fluff #joshua scenario #hong jisoo scenario #seventeen scenario #seventeen imagines #seventeen oneshot

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romansleftshoulderpad · 4 years

Text

Chapter Five - Origins

The Echo in the Mirror

Words: 2,503

Ship: None

Warnings: Alcohol mention, mentions of underage drinking (no-one gets drunk), Body mutation, panic attack, sex jokes

Tags: @fandermom @patchworkofstars @poisonedapples @hogwarts-my-love @opaque-puppet @omni-hamiltrash @darling-elm @jynxlovesluck @madly-handsome @strickenwithclairvoyance @limitededitionsanderssidesblog @ab-artist @sometimeswritingsometimesdying @ultimate-queen-of-fandoms2 @because-were-fam-ily @gattonero17 @analogical-mess @joaniejustwokeup @whycantihavemorethan32characters

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If there was one thing the Dormir cousins were famous for, it was parties. So, it was no surprise that Remy’s Halloween party was one of the biggest events of the year. It was also very exclusive, you had to know the right people to get in. Any regular student would have dropped everything for a chance to go. Anyone except for Logan Hamilton, who had barely spoken to Roman or Virgil in days.

It was Wednesday, October 30th and the lunch bell had just rung. “You can’t keep ignoring me forever, Logan,” Virgil said. Logan only walked away, giving him a silent message. “That’s a very rude hand gesture!” he yelled.

Virgil sighed, falling against the wall as Logan walked away. He felt a hand on his shoulder and didn’t even bother to look up. He already knew there was a fifty percent chance of it being Roman (and the other fifty percent chance of it being Remy). “He’ll be back eventually,” Roman said. “We just need to talk to him.”

“I’m trying but he’s impossible to talk to when he’s angry. We’ve really fucked up.”

“Maybe we can get Patton to talk to him.”

Virgil laughed. “You think he’d listen to Patton?”

“What’s wrong with Patton?”

“Nothing,” Virgil said. “To us.”

“To us?”

“You’re pretty oblivious, Princey.”

“Oblivious,” Roman repeated. “Are you saying Logan has a crush on me and therefore won’t talk to Patton?”

Virgil pulled himself from the wall and took Roman’s hand as they walked down the hall. “First of all, you wish Logan had a crush on you. I think you’re just looking for an excuse to change your name to Roman Hamilton.”

“Imagine marrying Logan Hamilton. I could never,” Roman teased.

“Shut up you’re getting off-topic.”

“Weirdly defensive about marrying Logan,” he teased, bumping into Virgil’s side with a laugh. He felt pain in his hand as Virgil’s fists grew tighter. “Ow. Ow. Ow. Okay, okay I take it back.”

“Even if I did have a crush on Logan, he’s straight,” Virgil said. “And you’re getting off-topic. He’s not listening to me, he’s obviously not going to listen to you, and Patton isn’t even in the same room as the table.”

“And, again, what’s wrong with Patton and why am I oblivious?”

“Logan doesn’t exactly, uh, like Patton. And if you haven’t been able to notice that, you certainly have your head in the clouds.”

“I’m king of the clouds.”

“You’re not even a prince, Duke.”

“Touché.”

“I’ll send him a text,” Virgil said. “I just... hope he’ll respond.”

“You guys have been best friends since- what? Seventh grade?” Roman squeezed Virgil’s hand and leaned into him. “He’ll come around.”

Virgil leaned into the touch, both their heads pressed together as they turned a corner towards the school cafeteria. “This is worse than any fight we’ve ever had. I don’t know what to do.”

Roman stopped dead in his tracks. He took Virgil by the shoulders and looked him dead in the eyes. (He still had to grow used to the fact that Virgil was now taller than him. The growth spurt he had hit during his sophomore year was still a surprise.) “Everything is going to be fine,” he said. “You know how I know it will be? Because if Hamilton thinks he can hurt my second best friend then I’m going to kick his ass with my new weird crazy powers.”

“And what powers are those?”

“I’ll figure it out, okay? Now, c’mon, either Logan is going to come back and we can sort out this spirit situation. Or- Or- we forget about Logan for one night and I show you and Patton how to have a good time.”

“But what about-“

“Shhh.” Roman placed a finger over Virgil’s lips. “It’s a Remy Dormir party. We’re going to get drunk off our asses and have a great time. Okay?”

“Okay.”

It was Thursday, October 31, nearly 7:00 O’clock at night. When Roman had arrived Remy was busy locking the last of the bedroom and office doors, any room that would give him a death sentence if it were trashed.

“I brought drinks,” he announced, holding two plastic bags in his hands. Patton and Emile exchanged a glance, staring at Roman with quirked eyebrows. “Relax.” He pulled a bottle out from the bag. “It’s Sprite.”

“Ro, I’m glad you’re here,” Remy said, sliding three stacks of paper plates across the counter. “I need you guys to open these.”

“Great to see you too, Rem.”

“The pleasure is all yours I’m sure. Hey, hand me that pumpkin, will ya? Thanks, babe.”

“I’m pretty sure you call me that more than your own boyfriend.”

“Everyone else is ‘Babe’,” Remy explained, “Emile is ‘baby.’”

Emile blushed, his face redder than his Steven Universe shirt. “Reeeeemmmyyyy.”

“Save that for the bedroom, baby,” Remy teased.

Roman shoved a finger in his mouth and gagged. “You two are disgusting.”

Remy raised an eyebrow and threw a tape dispenser at Roman’s head. “Oh, please, like you haven’t jerked it to m-“

“OKAY! SHUT THE FUCK UP!” he yelled, face bright red. He turned towards Patton and Emile. “Pro tip: Never fucking tell Remy about a crush.”

“I’d consider it a close matter,” he said, failing to hide a laugh. “Aww, c’mon it was years ago.”

“And yet, you’re still an asshole about it.”

“You act like you still have feelings.”

“You act like I won’t shake you off this damn ladder.”

“Ouch. Someone’s got a sore spot.”

“Ladder,” Roman warned. There was a knock on the door but it swung open before anyone could answer it.

“Sup, bitches! I brought beers!” Narcissa yelled. She wore all black with a leather jacket that could rival Remy’s own and a floppy witch hat that still had a price tag on the side. Her long black hair and choppy bangs framed her face nicely. She had a diamond stud in her nose and wore glittery purple eyeshadow.

“Eww.”

“Oh. Duke is here.”

“Ah. Draco can go fuck herself.”

The two stood silent, staring each other down for a total of five seconds before laughing and pulling each other into a hug. “Virgil pulled into the driveway a few seconds after me. He’ll be here in a few-“

“Sup, motherfuckers!”

“He’s here,” she deadpanned.

“Virgil! Virgil, look!” Roman said, smiling like a puppy. “It’s Narcissa.”

“Aww, it’s my chorus baby,” she cooed, ruffling Virgil’s hair. “We miss you.”

“Stop, stop, I spent an hour making this look perfect,” Virgil said. He was dressed head to toe in regal vampire gear with fake blood on his lips and chin.

“Lookin’ sharp, bloodsucker,” Roman complimented.

“Blood isn’t the only thing I suck,” he said with a wink. “Oh! Patton, you made it!”

“I did!” Patton said. “Any luck with, uh, you know who?”

Remy gasped as he jumped off the ladder. “Did someone take my title of You Know Who?!”

“That’s offensive to Lord Voldemort,” Narcissa said.

“Suck my dick, babe.”

“Only if you suck mine.”

“I haven’t had any luck,” Virgil said, taking a seat next to Patton. “I know he needs space, but I don’t know what to do. Our time is running out.”

“Emile,” Patton blurted out. “We could, uh, use Emile if Logan won’t agree.”

Virgil knitted his eyebrows together, glancing up and down at Patton as he wiggled in his seat. “You don’t sound too sure of yourself. Besides, replacing Logan would only make things worse.”

“You said yourself that we’re running out of time.”

“Patton, I-“

A voice escaped Patton’s throat, low and gravely, nothing like the young boy’s own. It said, “We only have tonight, Fear. What are you so afraid of?” Patton slapped a hand over his mouth.

“Your face is turning green.”

“Your arms are turning violet.”

“Princey,” Virgil called, “can we see you real quick?”

“Yeah, what’s- Oh fuck.”

“Oh fuck indeed,” Virgil growled. He grabbed Patton and Roman’s hands and pulled them into the bathroom.

It’s Thursday, October 31, nearly 7:45 at night when Logan finds himself pacing in his bedroom, his eyes going up and down trying to reread a text Virgil had sent hours ago. He couldn’t think of a response.

Logan, we need to talk.

I’m so sorry about what happened at Patton’s house and I’m worried that I'll never get to apologize enough. I know you and Roman don’t always get along, but he really does care about you. The two of us have been fighting trying to figure out what’s best for you but that’s a choice only you can make. We’ll be at Remy’s house tonight and I really hope I can see you there and properly make amends.

We found a way to summon the fourth spirit. His name is Knowledge and I can think of no one more deserving than you of that power. But above all, I want my best friend back. So, please, talk to me.

Logan practically had the message memorized by now. He paced back and forth watching time move forward as his battery drained. Should he stay angry at Virgil and Roman for trying to make this choice without him? Should he forgive them? Should he accept this power? “Feelings,” he mumbled, “the bane of my existence.

Then his phone rang. His texts disappeared as a picture of Roman in a prince costume from behind the scenes of his last play took their place. Why was Roman calling? His finger hovered over the answer button before he finally gave in and clicked it.

“You have three seconds to explai-“

“Logan! Logan, oh thank fairy godmother you answered! We need your help!”

“Is this some sort of trap?”

“No! No, seriously, Virgil and Patton are here with me! We- We don’t know what’s going on! Patton has like- like scales or something! And Virgil looks like he barely escaped the Wonka factory!”

“Roman, your eyes,” he could hear Patton saying. “They’re red.”

“Logan! Just, please, we’re at Remy’s house! Get here as fast as you ca-” The line went dead. The clocks around him slowed, time never fully halting. The room began to dim.

“Roman?” Logan asked, frantically trying to call him back. Every attempt failed. His heart was pounding in his chest. He was having a panic attack but he didn’t even have the time to pull himself out of it. He ran for his bedroom door, trying to pull it open but the handle wouldn’t budge.

“You are not needed there. Not yet,” a voice spoke.

Logan’s eyes welled with tears as he frantically pulled at the door handle. “LET ME OUT!” he screamed. “ROMAN NEEDS ME! LET ME OUT OF HERE!”

“No one can hear you now, Logan Zander Hamilton,” the voice said. “We have temporarily pulled apart from the known universe. There is no one outside that door. It’s only you and me. I suggest we have a little chat.”

Logan pressed his back against the door and fell to the ground, hugging his knees. “My- My friends,” he choked out. “They need me. They need me!”

“We need you, Logan Zander Hamilton,” he said, almost perfectly mimicking Virgil’s voice. Almost, yet too robotic. He wasn’t as caring and compassionate as Virgil always was. He appeared as a reflection in the mirror, a perfect doppelgänger to Logan but with something cold and robotic in his eyes. He looked like a man but he could not pass as human. “My friends and yours are now one.” He pressed his hand against the glass and walked through as easily as someone would walk through a wall of gelatin. And with that, the mirror seemed to bounce back as easily as gelatin without so much as a crack to prove that he had broken through. As he stepped closer, Logan could see how inhuman his eyes were. He was the cosmos hidden inside of a human shell. “Join me- Join us- and learn the secrets of your existence.”

“If- If I do this,” he asked, trying to wipe away the last of his tears, “will I be able to save my friends?”

“With the power of knowledge, you can save humankind.”

“They aren’t human, are they? Not anymore, at least. They’ve been... infected.”

“How observant of you.”

“I don’t need to save humankind,” he said, “I just need to save them.”

“Any panic or pain they are experiencing now is only at the cost of summoning me,” Knowledge said. “Whether aware or not, they have brought me to you. Neither I nor them will be at rest until I have a vessel.”

“For Virgil,” Logan said, “and for Roman. And Patton.” He stuck out his hand towards Knowledge. “I’ll do it.”

Knowledge took Logan’s hand. His human shell melted away and Logan found himself being blinded by the pure light in front of him. He expected to choke and cry in pain as Virgil and Roman had done. Instead, he found warmth traveling from his fingertips through his veins and arteries. He found warmth traveling through him in all directions. His head felt light and his chest felt full of the purest air.

Logan woke up from his bed. He slid on his glasses and looked at his reflection in his phone’s camera. His eyes held pools of stars. He was the cosmos inside of a human shell. He felt enlightened.

Logan put his phone in the pocket of his jeans, grabbed a jacket, and ran out of his house as fast as his legs would take him. When he got to Remy’s house his heart was pounding in the best possible way. He walked in, dodging students as he made his way towards the bathroom.

“LOGAN!” Virgil yelled, smiling brightly as the lights around them flickered with electricity.

“Maybe don’t destroy the lights here,” Logan teased. “You guys summoned a spirit. How the hell did you do that?”

“I, uh, think that was my fault,” Patton said meekly.

“It was Morality who started it,” Virgil corrected. “Not Patton.”

“Is there any difference?” Patton asked.

“Yes,” Logan said. “And no matter what, we must remember that there are differences between us and the spirits using us for personal gain.”

“Woah,” Roman whispered, leaning close to Logan. “Your eyes look wicked right now.”

“You accepted his powers,” Virgil said in disbelief. He smiled brightly, pulling Logan into a hug. “We’re superheroes!”

“We haven’t done anything heroic,” Logan said. “Being superhuman does not automatically make one a hero.”

“Be gay, fight crime,” Roman announced. Virgil shot him a look. “That’s going to be my motto. I’m copyrighting it as we speak.”

“You’re such a nerd,” Logan said with a laugh.

“That’s Logan’s way of saying ‘I love you.’”

“No, it’s just my way of calling you a nerd.”

There was an annoyed knock at the door. “Can you guys have your orgy somewhere else? You’ve been in there for nearly an hour,” Remy yelled.

The three of them laughed, their skin and faces slowly returning to normal. “Well, my friends,” Roman said. “Welcome to the rest of our lives.”

#sanders sides fic

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thanksjro · 4 years

Text

Last Stand of the Wreckers, Issue #1: A Couple of Nerds Nerd it Up

The year is 2009, and you are a British man in his mid-30s. You were a part of a fan club for Transformers in the 90’s, and you wrote a lot of fanfiction and comic scripts for it. The only real claim to fame you have is a novel-length fic you wrote to try and bridge the gap between Generation 1 and the Beast War era, one that a lot of people have read and refer back to. You’re pretty content with that, and don’t try to break into any sort of writing career on your own. You have a job in public service, you have a family.

One day, your old buddy Nick gets in contact. He wants some help with a story he’s working on for the current holder of the Transformers comics. It’s called Last Stand of the Wreckers.

Things are about to get very busy for you.

I’ll go ahead and say it- not any mechpreg in this one. You gotta wait until the sequel series for things to get weirdly horny, sorry to say. Also, technically only a plotting credit for Roberts here.

We hadn’t yet gotten to the point where he was allowed to rub his grubby little nerd hands all over everything.

So, let’s get to the nitty-gritty of this thing, shall we?

Our story opens on a lovely, sunshiney day on the beautiful Garrus-9.

Perfect weather for a picnic, don’t you agree?

Fortress Maximus and his cohorts are hard at work defending against the Decepticon forces, who have launched an attack on just about everything in the galaxy. This event is happening in the background of All Hail Megatron, as part of an offensive attack under the orders of ol’ Buckethead himself.

Kick-Off, another Autobot at Garrus-9, thinks that this is the work of someone on the inside, and Fort Max wants his prison intact for when they find the rat bastard who caused all this mess to happen, so he can lock that son of a gun up for a long, long time.

Then Overlord shows up.

There he is, the nastiest creature to grace the galaxy, a bitch so extra he’s apparently got to cycle through BOTH of his alt-modes before he lands on the scene to wreck shop.

Prior to Last Stand of the Wreckers, Overlord didn’t really have a whole lot going on. It’s a big part of why he was made the antagonist for this miniseries- nobody else was using him, so no risk of fudging up any continuity happening outside of it. Prior to this, he was mostly part of the Japanese Transformers scene, appearing in the Super-God Masterforce anime and manga. He had a reputation for being a bad dude there too, but not quite to the level we’ll be getting to here.

Also, he was actually two people, who were married. He is not a married couple in Last Stand of the Wreckers.

Overlord asks which one of the much weaker, smaller, and less terrifyingly kissable Decepticons is in charge, and Skyquake steps up, despite the fact that everyone is obviously nervous about the fact Overlord is here. Overlord lets Skyquake know that the plan Megatron came up with is out, and he’s got the new hotness that’ll really put Garrus-9 on a map labelled “Places That Are the Actual Worst.” Of course, Skyquake, who seems to think a guy named Overlord can be reasoned with, says that they can’t deviate from Megatron’s grand plan, and promptly is shot to death for his troubles.

And that’s a series wrap on Skyquake! Let’s give him a hand, folks!

With the little dude out of the way, Overlord’s decided it’s time to go full cowl on the Autobots, ripping them limb from limb. Literally, in some cases. It’s pretty gruesome, but then again, that’s kind of the point. This is a pretty dark miniseries, and not just because of all the violence- but we’ll get to all that later on.

With the Autobots subdued, it’s time for Overlord to really strut his stuff. He releases all the Decepticon prisoners, and promises them a grand old time of torturing their former captives. As a show of good will…? he throws them Fort Max to play with, saying that the only rule is they have to at least TRY to not kill him.

Smash cut to two years, four months, later.

Some nerds just got put on the Wreckers, and they truly are the cream of the crop.

Garrus-9’s gonna be in good hands.

The dude who’s totally copping Optimus Prime’s look is Pyro, and the little dude with the blue helmet and tragic backstory is Ironfist. There’s also Dipstick, but this isn’t about him.

Just as things look like they can’t get any more exploded, their ride shows up, and it’s time to go. They say they’ll catch Dipstick later, but that’s honestly pretty unlikely, given the nature of the Wreckers as a group.

The boys load up into the ship, but find something not quite to their expectations- instead of Ultra Magnus being there to greet them, it’s none other than Verity Carlo, human extraordinaire!

And she’s in her jammies. No real point in getting dressed for a bunch of guys who don’t even understand the concept of nudity, I guess, though I do have to question how vacuum sealed her breasts are.

Unless Verity is one of those godless heathens who actually owns an underwire sports bra.

The boys react to their first human in different ways- Ironfist has his parental instincts kick in hard, immediately ready to protect and potentially die for Verity. The others are a little less impressed, claiming that she’s some sort of stowaway who Magnus only puts up with because she’s good at playing house.

Kind of weird that these giant robots are so good at sexism, seeing as at this point, none of them should even know what a woman is.

This is the point where the big guns come in to greet our boys.

So, here’s the deal: Garrus-9’s been out of contact with the rest of the Autobots for over a year at this point, and it was recently revealed by a mole in the Decepticon Justice Division that anyone getting even remotely close to the planet has been shot down. The destruction of the space bridges means that only a few folks are able to get to the place- cue the Wreckers.

Our boys have been chosen because they’ve done a lot of good work, and protected those around them. It’s an honor to be a Wrecker, but there’s always a catch:

I’m sure it’ll be fine!

Flashback to two years ago, back on Garrus-9, and Overlord’s really enjoying his time on the prison planet, hunting Autobots for sport and scaring the bejesus out of everyone by popping out of nowhere.

This is a typical reaction to seeing Overlord when he DOESN’T intend to kill you. The guy’s a menace.

Looks like they caught their prey, and they’re feeling pretty good about it. What a nice thing for them, I’m glad they’re having fun.

How does this guy know where he’s going? His chest’s so tall.

Our Autobot isn’t going down without a fight, though, as he takes the spear they’re stabbing him with and gives the ‘Cons a taste of their own medicine.

For about two seconds anyway, then he gets wasted by Overlord.

Of course, Overlord’s an equal-opportunity sadist, and also blasts the two guys who let a wounded Autobot get the better of them. With the game concluded and a valuable lesson taught, the Decepticons retire to the base, Overlord ordering the tall-chested guy- Snare- to bring the Autobot for recycling, something that Snare doesn’t seem terribly thrilled to do.

Seriously though, has this dude ever seen his feet?

Back on Ultra Magnus’ ship, Ironfist’s gone and passed out. When he wakes up, he’s surrounded by the rest of the boys, who are really concerned about his well-being. Aww, it’s sweet that they care so much about their buddy.

Ironfist brushes off the concern, saying that he’s fine, and then we’re introduced to his deep, dark, horrible secret.

He’s a massive fucking nerd.

And so are the guys who worked on this story. T’muk, indeed. Also, this robot has... my word, are those fingerprints? Roche, you spoil us.

Ironfist writes datalogs on the Wreckers in his spare time under the screen name Fisitron - Wreckers: Declassified, it’s called. Which, you know, good for him.

Well this panel’s art direction isn’t ominous AT ALL.

Springer enters the scene at this point, also very concerned about Ironfist, to an honestly interesting degree. Almost like he knows something. Ironfist, again, brushes it off. Kup notes that Springer seems like he’s got something on his mind, which he does.

That something is the fact that he’s most likely sending these boys to die, as is the nature of the Wreckers.

Kup points out that it always feels worse when people die under your personal command, then asks if Springer’s conscience is being weighed on by Impactor at all. Springer seems like he really doesn’t want to talk about Impactor. Before the conversation can get any more soaked in implications, the two are called to the bridge.

A flashback to a month prior on Garrus-9: Overlord watches as Kick-Off brutalizes a Decepticon, Borehole, in combat for his amusement. It seems like Kick-Off’s done pretty well for himself in the nightmare hellscape that is Garrus-9, though it’s probably because he’s running on basic survival instincts at this point as opposed to any actual enjoyment of what’s happening around him.

Kick-Off wins the fight by ripping Borehole’s head off.

That’s pretty metal. Most of what happens on Garrus-9 is pretty metal. Not in a good way. But metal nonetheless.

With the fight finished, Overlord congratulates the victor, and invites him back to his quarters to pick out his prize. Kick-Off seems to be off in his own little world at this point, probably disassociating due to trauma.

Back with the Wreckers, we finally see Ultra Magnus, Verity’s put a shirt on- likely at Magnus’ request- and we see what Springer and Kup were called to the bridge for. Looks like a Decepticon ship’s been shooting out a distress signal, and it ain’t lookin’ so hot at present. Ultra Magnus attempts to hail, but it looks like too little, too late, as the thing’s hull integrity goes kaput and the whole thing explodes.

Seems like the end of that, right?

Nah.

Wow, that sure seems like it’ll be a problem. Better shoot that mysterious figure to death before they can be recognized by the cast and cause a whole slew of issues.

Aw, man! Too late. Looks like someone broke out of jail, and nobody is happy to see him.

With that character reveal, we end Issue #1 of Last Stand of the Wreckers.

#transformers #jro #last stand of the wreckers #issue 1 #maccadam #Hannzreads #text post #long post #story plotting #wreckers trilogy

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the-bjd-community-confess · 4 years

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I don’t really get it when people have to make a “But what about” counter confession.

If someone does a confession/complaint about people making offensive/tasteless/stereotypical character portrayal of a group, through dolls, that doesn’t suddenly make it all perfectly fine, just because someone from that demographic created it.

People are often well aware that not every tasteless, or even harmful portrayal has been created by someone who is not part of the demographic, people are aware that even a gay guy can create a problematic portrayal of a gay character. Just like how someone from outside that demographic can create a good portrayal of a character from a different demographic. Eg: A straight male can create a good gay male character. This, in case people are seriously wondering, is because characters aren’t just one specific label. A gay character isn’t (or shouldn’t be) just “The gay character, who’s gay.” if the character is well written, then it’s more like “This is a character, with his own personality, and story, who’s also gay.” Not to mention that research exists.

Of course there’s also people being utterly ridiculous, where people will throw a fit because: “You created a 30 yo lesbian character, but you’re not a 30 yo lesbian? How dare you, that’s UNACCEPTABLE!” Who need to calm down. No matter if they’re not-part, or actually part of that demographic. Humans aren’t a hivemind, so obviously characters can vary widely, there’s no way in Hell or Heaven, that there’s only “One true character of demographic X”. So

But if a bunch of people tell you, separately, in their own words say: “Hey, I find this portrayal of demographic X to be stereotypical in a very harmful way, I don’t like that.”

Is it really needed to come out, white knight, and go “But some people from "demographic” create these characters!“

People know, especially people who deal with this stuff. It’s also a bad argument, it’s not gonna make the portrayal better in anyone’s view, insiders or outsiders, just because of who the creator is. It also gives a vibe of "I don’t care about the other people IN the demographic, who originally said they dislike the portrayal of their demographic in those ways.”

People can be annoyed, and maybe even disgusted by portrayals of sexuality/race/ethnicity by people, without needing to be reminded that people from that demographic create these characters.

The concepts of: live and let live, and being able to critique these portrayals, are not mutually exclusive. Someone can accept that these creations exist, and leave people alone about it, while also being able, and allowed to complain, critique, and even rant about these creations in their own space, or, as in this case, on public confession blogs. It’s obviously totally unacceptable when it gets personal, or to actually harassing specific people.

Yes, someone from that group can create these characters. Maybe some people are gonna be rude about it, and get personal, but that’s not all the people who’re against these portrayals.

And it’s not like this is gonna stop people from creating these characters, portrayals of the LGBTA, different ethnic groups, and races have always existed, both by people from these groups, and outsiders, and they’ll definitely continue to exist, because there are often people who’ll like, or find these characters interesting, or easier to “connect to”, for personal reasons.

Main reason I’m saying this, is because it feels like people are, in a way, belittling genuine concerns, and discomfort of people, by saying “But think about the other people!” as if the person’s criticism isn’t valid, or their feelings should be considered offensive because SOMEONE who likes these portrayals, or does the, could read them.

It also sounds like trying to push away people’s concerns, or the feelings of people, and pitting them against each other, instead of just accepting that there are people who are annoyed by these things.

Create what you want to, but don’t be surprised when people call out the perpetuating of harmful stereotypes. Like the “trans men aren’t real men”, they’re just “men-lite soft uwu baby boys.” Or “trans women are just men in drag, with super male bodies.” Homosexuals, both f and m, “One is the man, and one’s the female in the relationship” or “Lesbians really just wanna be men, Gays just wanna be women.” All bi’s being unfaithful, and abusive. Etc. I doubt I have to go on when it comes to races, ethnicities, etc.

To cut it down:

People ranting about stereotypical/fetishitic/objectifying/offensive portrayals of their demographic through dolls, don’t need to be told that people from their demographic also create these characters. They/We know.

These characters will still be created, but maybe it’s also important to understand that people of these demographics are gonna speak out, and distance themselves from these portrayals, because they can be genuinely harmful. Especially when people who’re anti-demographic, use it as fuel to push their anti-demographic agenda.

Also, just something I do, a cheap “trick” to this is honestly the “Nothing but the character” approach, Subjective-objective. View a few characters, without knowing the creator, and decide if the characters “acceptable” or “unacceptable” in your own personal view, and knowledge of what the character is supposed to represent. Because knowing who/what the creator is, can often skew your opinion in one way or the other. So you make your subjective opinion, if a character is actually a good, and thoughtful representation, or not. (The objective, in subjective-objective means that you get just the character, the object, without the author tagged onto it.) You’d be surprised about some results you can find when doing this with other people.

Sorry if I started rambling, but it seriously feels like I’ve seen these types of defenses a lot in the BJD community, and people acting as if people can’t have their own opinions, or views on things, or if they do, they get cancelled or called out. And if you show your genuine opinion, or find something uncomfortable, people are gonna find some way to try and make it sound like you’re the bad person, and in the wrong, for not liking something. Even if you didn’t attack anyone personally, just stated your opinion on something that happens in the community.

Also, I’m NOT a native english speaker. So some stuff might sound weird, or sound repetitive, weirdly jumbled, or lacking in proper structure. “But your English isn’t that bad!” That really doesn’t have much to do with how good I am at really explaining, or getting my point across. So if something sounds weird, that’s the reason. Because through my the lens of my languages-grammar it all seems fine.

~Anonymous

#BJD #ABJD #BJD Confessions #TrueBJDConfessions #BJD Characters

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logicalbookthief · 5 years

Text

Game Night

So I actually had most of this written before 15x18, and then the episode gave us great Maggie + B team moments, so I figured, well, now I have to deliver.

Featuring drunk interns, Schmico, canon-compliant Jaggie (barely but for the sake of, yanno, canon) and teeny-tiny hints to potential future Caggie because @schmicoismysunsword has convinced me it ships.

Now cross-posted on ao3!

Maggie doesn’t make a habit of mixing her professional life with her personal one. Aside from the fact that her sisters work at the same hospital as she does, as does her boyfriend, and her ex-- Look, the point is, Maggie tries to keep her private life a private one, albeit not with the passion of Dr. Bailey.

Just -- she has the unfortunate tendency to babble. Aloud. To anyone nearby, who might be listening.

Which meant unintentionally venting to interns, who were always around, and always eager to listen. It starts with Parker, who, if not sworn to secrecy, at least has the decency to pretend he isn’t hanging off every word that comes out of her mouth. Schmitt is one of the more eager of the bunch and he happens to be on her service today.

“Game night,” she mutters long-sufferingly. “Why tonight, when Meredith and Amelia are busy, and apparently, I don’t have enough of a life where I have any excuse to be somewhere else.”

“Oh, right, the football game is tonight. Nic-- Dr. Kim mentioned that was a thing-- a thing Dr. Avery does,” Schmitt stutters, casting some furtive, flustered looks her way. Honestly, Maggie isn’t paying attention.

“I hate when I have to pretend to care about sports on TV. You know what else is on tonight? The Magicians. But you don’t see me making a night of it with friends.” Not that she has any, apparently. At least, any without kids or prior commitments.

Maggie deflates, more self-conscious than she means to be. “April enjoyed watching sports. Or maybe she was better at pretending than I am...”

Something dejected in her tone must spark a bit of nerve in Schmitt, who clears his throat. “Hey, you could -- uh, you could come out with us tonight,” he says, shrinking a bit under her stare. “Uh, if you wanted.”

“Us?” she echoes critically.

“Oh, um, well there’s me, Doctors Helm, Qadri, Parker--” All interns, Maggie mentally concludes, at the exact moment Schmitt realizes he’s asking an attending to tag along with his friends.

“Never mind, it--” Finding an extra burst of nerve, Schmitt spews out in a rush, “It’s trivia night at this pub we like and you’d make a great ringer.”

Then he goes on ahead to the next patient on their rounds, as Maggie blinks. Has she sunk so low to consider to hanging out with a couple of kids?

Except, she thinks with a wince, that sounds exactly like something Kiki would’ve said to her. After all, it isn’t as if the interns are that much younger than she is. Maggie’s so far ahead it only feels that way. She was always the kid to talk to the adults rather than friends her own age. And when she attended her first year of medical school still in braces while her peers were all adults, she had no choice but to grow up fast.

Sacrificing one night of professional integrity probably wouldn’t tarnish her career forever. And a trivia night is exactly the sort of brain flexing she would prefer over an evening of her male coworkers yelling about a ball not making it over the right line.

“What happens outside of the hospital, stays outside of the hospital,” Maggie springs on a stunned Schmitt, ending any further discussion with a firm glance. “I’ll be there at 7.”

“Dr. Pierce, if you don’t mind me saying so,” Qadri begins, and then, with the utmost reverence, “You fucking rock at trivia.”

Schmitt and Parker whoop in agreement.

“I do,” Maggie asserts, flushed with victory. And it’s probably the jalapeno poppers, too.

“I can’t believe you argued with the guy asking the questions,” Schmitt admits. “And you won.”

“Well, if you don’t have an encyclopedia knowledge of Happy Potter,” she preens. “Don’t try me.”

Helm returns with the celebratory round of shots, including one for her. Is it unethical to take shots with your interns? While on the clock, yes, definitely. Then again, it’s a little unethical to sleep with interns, too, and yet--

Maggie downs the shot.

Parker hisses as the burn of alcohol slides down his throat. “I need at least three more of those after the study session I pulled last night,” he says, winded.

“Right, your intern exams are coming up.” A swell of fondness rises in her chest as she remembers toiling over her textbooks, the ease of assessment, the pride of passing with high marks. “You guys excited?”

A chorus of groans answers her question. Oh, right. Not everyone was a child prodigy who gloried in tests. Maggie flinches and figures to hell with it, she’s already in this deep. She orders the next round of shots.

“I’ve read so much I wore out my contacts,” Schmitt mumbles, his cheek plastered against the table.

“Did you fall asleep wearing them again?” Taryn huffs at his miserable nod. “Dude, you’re going to go blind.”

“And fail your exam,” Parker adds, prompting another groan.

Maggie has the weird urge to pat his head consolingly. Luckily, Qadri does it instead. “At least if you fail you have a hot surgeon boyfriend to support you,” she mutters enviously.

“You could be a house-husband,” Helm proposes, raising her glass at Maggie and Qadri. “Because it’s 2019 and that’s equality.”

Schmitt seems to consider this seriously.

“You wouldn’t have to shave fish,” Qadri tacks on, wrinkling her nose. “No offense.”

It takes a full minute for Maggie to realize the remark is directed at her. “Oh! None taken,” she says quickly. “I take no responsibility for that exercise. Or the smell.”

“Which still hasn’t come out of my hijab,” Qadri mourns. Seeing Qadri look any amount of sad, Maggie decides suddenly, should be a crime listed under do no harm.

“I’m sorry,” she offers. “I’ll make Jackson buy you a new one!”

For some reason, that sets them into a fit of giggles.

“Drunk Dr. Pierce is the best,” Parker declares, and then blushes, bright and splotchy. “Except for, uh, sober Dr. Pierce. She’s the most wonderful, uh--”

“Careful, don’t hurt yourself,” says Helm, wryly.

“Sober Dr. Pierce would be at home, pretending to care about sports,” Maggie scoffs.

“With Link, Dr. Avery and Dr. Kim?” Dahlia grins. “Sounds like a dream.”

“Pretty sure we’ve all had that dream,” Levi snorts.

“Uh, hello?” Helm pulls a face, jerking a thumb at herself. “Lesbian.”

“Everyone except Taryn has probably had that dream,” he amends.

“Her, and me,” Maggie says blandly. Alcohol loosens her tongue almost as much as bullies and outrage. “As if our free time isn’t limited enough by his projects, and my environmental research, now Jackson’s gone and bonded with his new buddy Link, who loves sports, and camping, and nature, and -- bikes, I guess?”

“Nico says Link’s got a man-crush on Dr. Avery,” Schmitt whispers in what’s not really a whisper. Parker snorts messily into his drink, which she finds weirdly endearing.

“Please tell me Kim also has one of those secret bro handshakes with Link?” Maggie begs.

Schmitt nods. “Yeah, no, they do. He tried to show me it once, but I, um, accidently hit his chin with my open palm.”

Fits of laughter overcome the group while Schmitt flushes. “Aw. Did you kiss it better?” Parker wheedles.

“I don’t kiss and tell,” says Schmitt, tight-lipped.

“You do so,” Helm snorts, shoving him in the chest.

“Hey,” says Qadri, noting how Maggie’s spaced out. “At least if he’s watching sports and -- I dunno, crushing beer cans? -- with Dr. Link and Levi’s ortho god, then you don’t have to act like you want to hear about baseball.”

“Football,” Parker corrects.

“There’s a difference?” Qadri wonders.

Maggie would try to answer, except the implication has finally sunk in. “His ortho god?” she asks, gesturing skeptically at Schmitt.

“Yuh huh. Dr. Kim is his boyfriend,” Helm shares with relish.

“Oh!” What she means to say is congrats, yet what emerges is a clumsy, “Wow. Good job.”

Schmitt only shrugs. “I don’t know how,” he confesses in a slightly dazed tone. “Sometimes I think I died in that freak windstorm and this is just the last of my synapses firing off one last wet dream.”

“Dude, that’s dark,” Parker murmurs.

“I haven’t slept or had sex in...” Schmitt pauses, clearly wracking his brain. “What’s today?”

“Preaching to the choir,” Maggie mutters. Huh, maybe that has something to do with her mood.

“Oh, God,” Dahlia exclaims, as if she just cracked the code. “What if that’s why. What if Link is sleeping with Dr. Avery??”

Parker nods sagely. “That makes sense.”

“Oh, God,” Maggie echoes. After a couple shots of tequila, the theory seems totally plausible. “Oh, no, what do I--”

“Don’t worry,” Schmitt interjects, radiating a suspicious amount of calm. “Link is too busy fooling around with Dr. Shepperd to sleep with your boyfriend.”

Maggie exhales in relief. Then it dawns on her, what he actually said. “Wait,” she yelps. “What? He’s sleeping with my sister?”

Schmitt blinks. “You didn’t know?”

“No, I didn’t know!” Maggie gapes. “How did you know?!”

“He’s fucking the other ortho god,” Helm and Qadri chime in.

“Right,” says Maggie, slowly and with effort. “Right, okay, I’ve got to remember that detail for tomorrow. So maybe, only … one more round of shots?”

Helm’s eyes light up. “Dr. Pierce is the coolest,” she declares, and the rest unanimously agree.

Maggie Pierce has never been named the coolest anything -- the most impressive, sure, and the most talented by far -- so she can’t help the thrill that shoots through her, headier than any glass of alcohol.

“We’re taking a Lyft.” Parker has emerged as de-facto leader of the drunk brigade, voted in as least likely to order an axe-murderer for a driver. “Levi, you in?”

Schmitt shakes his head, wincing as it jostles his precarious balance. “Nico said he would pick me up if I wanted.”

Helm snickers. “House-husband,” she sing-songs at him.

“Breadwinner,” Schmitt fires back. Neither of these are insults, Maggie notes, uncertain if she should point this out.

“Ma--” Parker catches himself with another blush. “Dr. Pierce, do you, uh, need a ride?”

“Hey!” Schmitt says like he’s had a full-on brainblast. “You can wait with me and Nico can get you, too.”

“Really?” Maggie perks. It saved her the trouble of calling anyone liable to embarrass her; namely, either of her sisters or worse, Karev. “That would be fantastic.”

“Sure, he’s already at Jackson’s place,” Schmitt replies confidently. If she were slightly more sober, Maggie doubts that logic would hold up to scrutiny. As it is, it makes perfect sense to wait for Schmitt’s ortho god to drop her off at the place he drove in from.

Turns out, Dr. Kim is a sexy sight to behold, even with a proprietary arm wrapped around Schmitt, who’s too busy mumbling grateful nonsense into his shoulder to notice the adoration in his boyfriend’s gaze.

If he is surprised to catch Maggie in a similar state of inebriation, Kim has the decency to make no mention of this. Instantly, he’s her new favorite attending-level doctor. He is also a gentleman, offering Maggie his hand as she clamors into the backseat of his car, all the while still steadying Schmitt with a hand clasped over his waist.

Maggie marvels at the coordination and strength, wonders if he could carry them both simultaneously, should the need arise.

“He’s awesome at carrying people,” Schmitt brags, meaning that, whoops, she said that aloud.

Kim chuckles. “Thanks, babe,” he says, wryly. “But at the risk of oversharing, maybe don’t go into detail.”

“What, that it’s a sex thing?” Schmitt says in what he clearly believes is a whisper for their ears only, before he collapses back onto the seat, supremely self-satisfied. At exactly the same volume, he adds, “See? I can be discreet.”

“Great job,” Kim snorts, unimpressed. And yet unable to resist pressing a kiss into his boyfriend’s brow before he starts up the engine. They’re cute, Maggie thinks blearily, and hopes she managed to keep the thought inside her head.

Judging by the grin Kim shoots her out of the corner of his eye, she probably didn’t succeed.

Jackson looks surprised to see Nico at his door again, not that long after he left. “Hey, man. Did you forget something?”

“Nope,” says Nico, cheerily. “Just doing a drop-off.”

“You--” Jackson stares in bewilderment, until Nico moves aside, allowing his passenger to sidestep his bulk. “Mags?”

Maggie stumbles to the door, using one of his sturdy biceps for balance. “Thanks for the lift, Kim,” she waves over her shoulder.

He nods, still smirking as he walks back to his car, away from the bewildered Jackson.

“Mags, are you -- you good?” He hovers close behind as she carefully navigates the stairs, forgoing the temptation of the couch for the queen-sized bed.

“I,” Maggie begins, slurring with great dignity. “Fucking rock at trivia.”

The morning-after is almost worth the hangover. Watching Jackson try to puzzle out what she got up to last night -- and exactly how Dr. Kim fits into the picture -- is too funny, since Maggie deigns to tell him only the bare minimum, lest she look as silly as she feels when she walks into work with a lingering stuffiness.

“Wow. You look as though you need at least a double-shot,” says a familiar voice, rippling with sympathy, but also a fair bit of humor. “Good thing I got you a triple.”

Maggie stares blankly at Kim and at the to-go cup suddenly placed in her hands. Truly he is a kind and benevolent ortho god. “What’s this for?”

Kim grins. “Last night my boyfriend went on about how cool Dr. Pierce was, and how hungover you’d be, and that it was his fault,” he explains, obviously quite amused. “And this morning he groggily demanded I make amends by being especially nice to you this morning. Hence, coffee.”

“That is--” A level of thoughtfulness that made all boyfriends, including her own, seem like total jackasses in comparison. Nico smirks as if he knows exactly what she’s thinking and enjoys the high ground very much. “So unnecessarily sweet. Thank you.”

“No problem,” he says, and leans in, a sheepish twitch to his unfaltering smile. “I’d also appreciate if he didn’t get fired over whatever you may or may not have heard last night.”

Maggie laughs.

“Honestly, I’ve forgotten a decent amount already,” she admits, for the sake of all three of them. “Except the part about Dr. Link and my sister?”

Kim chokes on his sip of coffee. “Ah, you didn’t hear that from me.”

“No, I heard that from your drunk boyfriend,” she replies, picking up the pace to follow his long strides. “But I absolutely need to hear more from you!”

At his reluctance, Maggie pulls out her trump card. “I’ll buy you a bagel.”

Nico stops to considers her. “Multigrain, veggie cream cheese?”

Evidently, Kim has a price. Maggie appreciates in someone who is still, until further notice, her favorite attending.

Petition for more of what 15x18 gave us with Maggie and the interns? And for Maggie and Nico to become friends?? Hire me Grey’s

#schmico #schmico fic #maggie pierce #levi schmitt #nico kim #b team #grey's anatomy #taryn helm #casey parker #dahlia qadri

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