#also in ep 3 the guide not understanding what anyone was doing | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

system-of-a-feather · 1 year

Text

Less moody about it cause - actually no equally moody but less bothered by it if that makes sense - but as much as I am glad to be working through the gender stuff with the system, or rather for the system until now, finding out just how deep this rabbit hole of misery goes fucking sucks and is literally draining as shit.

I think I'm getting fatigued cause I've been bearing it on my own for what, like three years? Solely to give Riku the time to focus and catch up on healing sexual trauma (which I've been responsible for monitoring and guiding them through) and so that Ray - who is our stability backbone - didn't have to endure or risk his stability for longer than needed when little could be done (cite Riku's sexual trauma being a blocking point for any genuine deep thought on gender at the time)

Like, in hindsight, and Riku pointed this out the other day, but in a polyfragmented system that is majorily transmasc, I'm the only part that has actively stayed focus on this and have kept a very intense tab and focus on it while juggling being the ferryman for Riku's sexual trauma recovery, the advocate for EPs for like a year and a half of that time, and the Persecutor Breaking-In Guy like

It's totally fair for me to "start getting burnt out" and if anything its really impressive that I am only NOW getting burnt out being the only one dealing with a topic that regularly makes me suicidal (not active but not passive either, a secret third thing - active but absolutely not doing it)

And honestly though, having dealt with that and been the ferryman through trauma processing of CSA shit for like 3 years and forcing persecutors to communicate their trauma and issues effecticely to help them, I REALLY don't get why anyone would think someone would CHOOSE to be trans or that it is anything but a group of people just trying to live life with a fucking shitty hand

Like I'm sure others would disagree, but as someone with a lot of trauma thats carried less experienced trauma holders through living inspite of what happened to them, dysphoria is literally the only mental / psychological / physical means of suffering that has ever had me **depressed properly** rather than any form of depression or hurt that immediately turns into a burning fire and rage of some sort

Literally raising myself, being a trained dog, regularly handing my dad his own ass on a plate in fights, dealing with an oppressive DID system, fucking America existing, first hand and second hand shit with sexual trauma, betrayal from the person who was supposedly our "only support" - literally dysphoria is the top dog of a beast I have ever had to push through

And the fact that some people minimize how much people with dysphoria could be struggling? It just blows me the fuck away

If you gave me the option to solve our dysphoria and all its complications in a snap or resolve our trauma and all its complications in a snap I would rapidly click dysphoria without hesitation and without consulting the system

Cause at this point I am the Trauma King. I'm the best at handling it and Im (at least one of) the best at dragging parts through Trauma Coping 101. And I'm also the dysphoria king, and as it is such a hypothetical situation would fall into my domain to make decisions on since I have the largest breath and experience with both

And it would be such an easy decision I kid you not.

But anyways, this is equally for the trauma / DID community as it is for the trans community. And for the transfolk out there, good god know your misery is valid and you arent being dramatic or asking for too much to have people respect you and make small changes to make your suffering slightly less

It shouldn't be needed, but if you need a socially normalized right to validate your hurt and need for aid, this post stands here as verification as a survivor of a shit ton of traumas that the suffering is absolutely, at the very least, comparable. If people can understand how bad it is to have to deal with PTSD let alone the shit thay gives you DID (diagnosed), there is at least one person out there that says dysphoria is more unbearable.

So what with all the American stages of transgenocide going on especially in America, I just wanted to let you know that they are the fucking atrocious people and whatever garbage transphobes say that might make you question your "choice" throw it in the fucking garbage.

Being trans isnt easy and wouldnt be anyones choice with how bullshit it can be

15 notes · View notes

thoughtsandfiction · 1 year

Text

Ep 3 of Mayfair Witches, or The One in which Rowan tries to walk to a house but is stopped by the plot.

So my major issue with Mayfair Witches is that it doesn't seem to be aware of it's own episode count, so it feels like it can have filler episodes. It cannot, and all they've been successful at doing is making me think there's not a lot of story to tell here (book fans, how dense is this story? Does it require a lot of stretching to make if a viable long running tv show?)

Not a lot happens in this episode and that worries me because we're approaching the half way mark, and it feels like we're still doing set up! I think Rowan should've gone with Carlotta. Would it be the smart choice for her? Probably not, but:

1) It would illustrate her desperation for family and answers about both her mothers (which is the whole reason she came here) 2) She asks Cip to identify the house in the picture (and later tries to go to it) but she didn't need him to do this! In Ep 2 the tour guide already told her it's The Mayfair House. Carlotta identifies herself as a Mayfair! Go with her! She is a more sure bet of having the answers you seek than stalker guy!! 3) Going with Cip is used as an opportunuty to explain The Talamasca and his powers, and do we need this right now?? We kinda get the gist of them as a supernatural bureaucratic organisation already, and Cip's powers have been demonstrated enough that I don't think anyone is hankering for a play by play. This whole thing slows down the urgency of Deidre's murder. 4.) This show needs more Carlotta/Beth Grant. There's something kooky about her performance that's made it one of the more enjoyable parts of the series. And Carlotta is the character with the most well articulated motives. She is a God-fearing (very Catholic) woman who is/thinks she is protecting her family from evil, and is fanatical about her protection (as VERY religious people often are). I want to see what her dynamic with Rowan is. It's time for Rowan really get into the woo woo shit. Also just the vibe of the aunts is so creepy. I mean, twin beds?? Give me weird adolescent sibling dynamics, yes! 5) I think Rowan meeting the Mayfairs, and experiencing the kinds of manipulation and restriction that Deidre was subjected to would be good motivation for her to run to Cip, and engender more feelings of sympathy for Deidre, and make Carlotta a viable suspect for her murder. 6) And I'm sure the Mayfairs have more of an idea about why Deidre was murdered. What is this 13th Witch thing? Why did Carlotta try so hard to keep Rowan away? Would Carlotta tell her? Probably not, but she's more likely to get some idea there than with Cip. 7) Lasher meets Rowan on the road, drugs her, seduces her, and then lures her to (what I'm assuming) is the Mayfair House. Carlotta and Catholic Hilda (seriously, what is her name?) are trying to find a way to get her to them. ROWAN ALREADY WANTS TO GO THERE! She has expressed this want! She was on her way! Why is everyone acting like she doesn't? Why are we getting in our own way?! And why get her there just to bring her back?! It's Two steps forward, two steps back! We're not moving!

Don't get me wrong, I understand why she goes with Cip. The moment is scary, and he's the only person she kinda knows. But get her to the house at some point in the episode. I mean, I would've rather heard Carlotta's explanation of what Lasher is and the evil he represents to her, and see Rowan try reckon with that, than hearing Cip repeat the vague descriptors we've been hearing since ep 1. Cip can still live his inspector gadget fantasy, cause somebody's gotta get the whodunit rolling, but this is Rowan's story. Let her drive the action! Give her things to do!

I'm gonna keep watching because I am very curious about how they're gonna write the rest of this. Most reviews I've seen and read say episodes 1-5 are meh and unfortunately that's proving to be true, but I'm nothing if not an optimist, so I'm still waiting for this story to kick it into high gear, and there are reasons for my faith. The scenes between Delphine and Carlotta are, I think, the most chilling stuff this show has done so far. Delphine's palpable fear? Carlotta's completely unsubtle manipulations? The race and class power dynamics at work? Her crushed in head?! Horro! Thriller! Good shit! It puts Carlotta up as a front runner for primary antagonist. There is something here, there's potential here. Let's hope we're done laying the groundwork and are finally going to tap into it.

Minor Asides:

So how does Lasher work?? Cause the reason Carlotta betrays Delphine is to trap Lasher, but he's still free enough to set fire to buildings, and dance around a funeral procession with Rowan??

What exactly were the Talamasca's protections? Cause Lasher could still find Rowan, and Rowan could just leave the building, so what did they actually do??

Witch hunters..... yay? I don't know. One the one hand, potential for some action and aggresive witchy woo, but one the other hand seems like a set up for Rowan to girlboss feminisim at some Men, a tactic employed by many "Show For/About Women," which can sometimes feel rote.

#mayfair witches #mayfair witches amc #the mayfair witches #rowan mayfair #carlotta mayfair #ciprien grieve #lasher #Anne rice universe #the witching hour #.

17 notes · View notes

franniebanana · 3 years

Text

CQL Rewatch - Ep 21

Note: I will be critical of Jiang Cheng in these posts. If you can’t handle that, please feel free to scroll on.

I really like this hug. I mean, if you've been reading these from the beginning, you know how much I love wangxian, but I'm really glad that Wei Ying's first actual hug after returning from the Burial Mounds is with Jiang Yanli. I'm not counting the hug with Jiang Cheng, because Wei Ying didn't hug him back. That hug was thrust upon him and he did not reciprocate. This reunion is very sweet, and tear-filled, and if I hadn't been up since 3 am, I might be feeling enough to shed a tear, myself. That being said, it's hilarious how they keep showing Jiang Cheng in the middle, looking awkward as he tries to balance joy and sadness. I get what the director had in mind, but it just looks weird lol.

But this part is also super sad, because Wei Ying again makes a promise he can't keep: that the three of them will be together forever. Now, I realize that if you hadn't read the novel or weren't familiar with the story, you should already know from the first two episodes that things do not turn out well for the three of them. However, if you're like me and have the memory of a goldfish, you probably didn't realize who everyone was in the first two episodes and even if you did, you've already forgotten long ago that Jiang Cheng was pissy and angry around Wei Wuxian and that Wei Wuxian's inner monologue reveals to us that JIang Yanli is dead. All that being said, his line about staying together forever hits a lot differently when you're very aware of how the story turns out, because Jiang Yanli dies, Jiang Cheng grows to hate Wei Wuxian more and more every day, and Wei Wuxian, of course, defects to save the Wens from slaughter. I think "let's stay together forever" is something you say and mean, but something that you know can't ever truly be. I think Jiang Yanli is old and wise enough to know that she will eventually marry and leave Lotus Pier, even though she will resist it for a while. The rest is uncertain, but I think at this point, Wei Wuxian really does believe and want to stay with the Yunmeng siblings and to stay at Jiang Cheng's side as he leads the Yunmeng Jiang Sect.

I will never not be heartbroken by this scene--even knowing how everything turns out--by how Lan Wangji looks at Wei Wuxian, how if things had been different in Yiling, he would have gone into that room and greeted him, how Wei Wuxian would have smiled at him and beckoned him inside, how they would have sat and Wei Wuxian would have talked Lan Wangji's ear off, like old friends. It's just so upsetting to me, and I can't ever shake that feeling in the pit of my stomach. I know what happens, but these two episodes, until they reconcile, really get to me. It's a horrible feeling when you want to help someone, but they don't see it as helping, and they only get upset with you. I deal with that on an almost daily basis, and I wouldn't wish that feeling on anyone. I really identify with Lan Wangji here, and I think that's why I get such a visceral reaction to seeing him like this.

I don't know if I've said this, but Lan Wangji is my favorite character in CQL and in every adaptation of this story. He is kind of my perfect character--he checks off all the boxes: one-sided love, pining, standing by the main character no matter what, practically abandoning his own family for the person he loves. I love that he has an almost child-like innocence, but he's still very wise; he's smart; he's strong; he has a strict moral code and he sticks to it without fail, even if it means going against his friends and family; he's a loner, but he loves deeply. When I first started watching the donghua and reading the novel, I liked Wei Wuxian the best, and he's still my second favorite character, but Lan Wangji has stolen my heart.

Of course, Wei Wuxian goes to this awkward dinner party, after spending three months around ghosts (and then killing a shit-ton of Wen soldiers), and all he can think about is that empty seat behind him, the one where Lan Wangji should be sitting. It's interesting how the Yunmeng siblings each react: Jiang Yanli starts to become concerned and commits it to memory. She's probably wondering why Lan Wangji isn't there, and then seeing how Wei Wuxian wistfully stares at the empty seat, she finds it even more unsettling. Jiang Cheng just seems embarrassed by Wei Wuxian here and his motivation is to get Wei Wuxian back on track so he doesn't make fools of the Yunmeng Jiang Sect in front of the other leaders. He obviously knows what happened between Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji, and I don't think he's bothered by it at all. He doesn't seem to care whether they're friends or not, and I'd say that even at this point, he'd prefer if Lan Wangji stayed out of Wei Wuxian's life altogether. He knows how close they were, and I think he also knows that Wei Wuxian would choose Lan Wangji over him if given that ultimatum. With Lan Wangji out of the picture, Jiang Cheng gets to maintain more control over Wei Wuxian than he otherwise would. Even later on at Lotus Pier, he wants Wei Wuxian around, helping him, being his right-hand man. He doesn't want him wandering around the city or galavanting off with other cultivators. Granted Wei Wuxian was drinking at the time, but I don't think that invalidates my point that Jiang Cheng wants Wei Wuxian to stay in line and stay at his side where he can control him. You know, because he sees the relationship (as Wei Wuxian suggested) as the same as their two fathers: where Wei Wuxian is in a subservient role to Jiang Cheng. Mind you, that's different from seeing him as a brother, and I think, while there's some of that mixed into his other feelings, it's a very small portion.

No screenshot, but the following scene, after Wei Wuxian leaves the dinner party, Jiang Cheng follows him out. And even here, he asks what's wrong--asks if he's upset because of Lan Wangji--but then scoffs at how that could really be what's bothering him. He says something like, "Why did you come here just to be disliked by him?" I think while he gets that they have a close bond, he doesn't really understand the depth of the relationship. He's jealous of Lan Wangji, but doesn't fully understand why. Ultimately, I think Jiang Cheng, because of his parents and the way he was raised, really doesn't understand what it's like to have a good relationship with anyone. And this ignorance isn't his fault--he's a product of his parents and surroundings, and no one, including himself, has ever tried to fix this. So, without being able to really understand how relationships work, he scoffs at how Wei Wuxian could still be upset over what happened with Lan Wangji. Jiang Cheng essentially gave Wei Wuxian what he wanted in that moment, which was unconditional support to carry out his revenge, and yet Wei Wuxian is hung up on Lan Wangji not being supportive there, and in fact being in opposition to him. Jiang Cheng doesn't even really have friends, so he thinks Wei Wuxian should just get over Lan Wangji and move on with his life, but it's not that simple. Lan Wangji isn't just an acquaintance, he's not just someone that Wei Wuxian partnered up with to fight a battle or carry out a mission--he's a soulmate, a kindred spirit (if you want to go down a less romantic route).

I rarely can say anything bad about Jiang Yanli (except how she's almost always making soup), and here's another example: Chenqing. She's so far the only one who supports Wei Wuxian having a first class spiritual tool. She immediately shows interest in the flute, even encourages him to give it a name. Lan Wangji immediately sees the flute as something bad, while she's completely supportive. And this is really what Wei Wuxian needs right now, and I love her for being there. She's also about the only person he will genuinely smile around. He gives everyone else forced or fake smiles, but not Yanli. At this moment, I think he only wants to be with her, and I can't really blame him when everyone else is either opposing him or just wanting something out of him. She really is coming from a place of sympathy and comfort that's different from how the others are handling things. Lan Wangji wants to help, yes, but he tries to force it.

Imagine being in this room, listening to Jin Zixun (I'm not even sure if that's his name lol) trash talk Wei Wuxian, wanting to say something in his defense, but being unable to, not just because it's not your place to do so, but also because you're not even sure if you can defend him anymore. I think Jiang Cheng is struggling with the same. He stands up to Jin Zixun, finally getting him to shut up by saying that it's a domestic affair for the Jiang Clan and none of his fucking business, but Jiang Cheng also struggles to find excuses for Wei Wuxian. And that would certainly be difficult, because Wei Wuxian is somewhat like a stranger now. He's similar, but he's not the same Wei Wuxian that Jiang Cheng grew up with. He's really a shadow of his former self. But Lan Wangji has the added bonus of not being able to speak on his behalf because he's not even in the same clan--who is he to defend Wei Wuxian? He can't even stand with the others at the table (can't or won't, I'm not sure), so he certainly can't speak to Wei Wuxian's honor in front of all the other leaders. I'm sure the conversation back in Yiling is still running through his mind: this is a Jiang Clan affair--and to have that repeated again to someone else. That very much puts Lan Wangji in the "other" position. He's not in Wei Wuxian's clan, therefore, it's none of his business. He should care about him. He shouldn't try to protect him. He shouldn't try to guide him. But the problem is he still cares deeply about Wei Wuxian, and he wants to help him and protect him and guide him.

These scenes are always hard to watch for me (thank god for the special edition cut). It's really hard to watch the clans doing to the Wens what the Wens have done to the other clans. As if war wasn't already terrible enough, you also have what happens to the prisoners of war. In this case, Wen Qing's sect are all healers and have little to do with the war that the rest of the Wen Clan was waging on the other cultivation clans. However, they are still treated as enemies and imprisoned. It's difficult to watch the other clans, who you want to root for, making the same mistakes and transgressions as the Wens, who we are supposed to look at as the proper enemies in the story.

As we've seen a few times in this episode already, Wei Wuxian is having trouble controlling all the negative energy that's surging through him and the Yin iron, and on some of those occasions, he's touched his old wound. As he does this here, everyone looks at him, but he just looks at Lan Wangji. This is the person he cares most about in this room, the person whose heart his closest to his. I have nothing profound to say--I just like it.

And of course Lan Wangji looks right back at him. He knows Wei Wuxian best, even better than his own "brother", Jiang Cheng. He knows what happened in Xuanwu Cave, he saw the effect the sword had on him. I feel like each time they exchange glances, they are both crying out to each other, but Wei Wuxian is too stubborn to ask for help and Lan Wangji doesn't want to force the issue and strain their relationship further.

The way Lan Wangji hesitates here before saying, "I don't know," kills me. To him, it's just further proof of how Wei Wuxian is getting farther and farther from him, how the chasm between them just keeps growing. He's upset here. He doesn't know what to do. He doesn't want to force Wei Wuxian to do anything--that's against his clan rules, but more importantly, against his own ethics--yet he doesn't want to stand by and do nothing while his friend destroys himself. I think we see Lan Wangji as a character who always knows what to do, someone who always knows the right path, but here we see how that's not true at all. This is a man who is very smart, very clever, but who is also unsure of himself. He's struggling with what's right and wrong. And he consults his brother here, hoping to get a clear answer, so that he'll know what to do next, but he gets nothing of the sort.

It would have been easier for Lan Wangji if his brother has simply said, "Wei Wuxian is wrong and an enemy," but of course he's more wise than that. Nothing is black and whit, and humans cannot be judged for what's on the surface. You have to look deep inside a person, know their intentions, and then you can judge if they are doing what's right or wrong. The problem is Lan Wangji doesn't know Wei Wuxian's intentions. Months ago, he know Wei Wuxian wanted to defend the weak, protect people who couldn't protect themselves, and live by such a just moral code. But now Wei Wuxian seems like a stranger, has murdered many, many people, and has taken cruel revenge upon Wen Chao and Wang Lingjao.

What I've noticed in this episode is that Wei Wuxian will look at Lan Wangji, but he always averts his eyes fairly quickly. It's as if he's afraid if they make eye contact for too long, he'll be letting Lan Wangji in, which he does not want to do under any circumstances. Letting Lan Wangji in means admitting what's going on as well as opening up Lan Wangji to danger. Wei Wuxian does not want anyone else getting hurt or dying because of him, so it's better to reject everyone and focus on his own clan.

Honey, I'd walk away too. It's hard to tell if Lan Wangji is about to cry or about to punch Wei Wuxian in the mouth--either one would have been excellent, but I'm leaning towards the latter. Lan Wangji had to answer Jiang Yanli. She met him by chance, but it was she who initiated the conversation. Of course, angst rules being what they are, we had to have a misunderstanding a la Wei Wuxian walking into the conversation midway and making the asinine assumption that Lan Wangji was just breaking his confidence by telling her EVERYTHING. Of course, anyone who knows Lan Wangji knows he'd never do such a thing. But when Wei Wuxian's shijie comes to him, voicing her concern and asking about him, he has no choice but to empathize with her and tell her what he knows.

I really like this little exchange. Reliving the fight on the rooftop, before they were acquainted, before they were friends--before Lan Wangji fell for him. This time when he attacks, it's not about malice, it's not about breaking the rules and bringing liquor into the Cloud Recesses--it's a man, looking at the one he loves, scared out of his mind, worried that that man is going to destroy his mind and body, using a taboo cultivation method. This fight is a love letter, as far as I'm concerned. It's an act of desperation.

Also I fucking love that around four or five people have asked Wei Wuxian where Suibian is, and each time he makes up a lie: he forgot it, he isn't in the mood, he didn't bother to bring it. But when Lan Wangji asks him, he doesn't respond. He doesn't lie, he doesn't laugh it off--whatever he does, Lan Wangji will know that he's lying, and Wei Wuxian knows that.

Other episodes: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | Or just check out the #CQL Rewatch hashtag

#wangxian #wei wuxian #lan wangji #cql #the untamed #jiang cheng #jiang yanli #mdzs #mo dao zu shi #wwx #lwj #ep 21 #cql rewatch

46 notes · View notes

meetmeatthecoda · 3 years

Text

Now that I’ve had some time to cry & mourn & actually think about that horrendous excuse for television... I have... some thoughts.

Firstly, the pace of that episode was insane. I mean, the season itself felt like we were slowly & tortuously hacking our way through a tangled rain forest, trying desperately to see the forest for the trees, but instead stuck cutting vines & branches down one by one... until we got to that finale, which felt comparatively like finally cutting away all the dense foliage only to immediately fall off a fucking cliff. You could just tell they were using the least amount of dialogue they could to move through so many weird emotions at fucking breakneck speed. I mean there was... the brief aftermath in Latvia, the 4 second plane ride to re-introduce Red’s illness after how many eps, Liz’s 3 second long recuperation, the awkward attempt at humor with the helium followed by a crash landing into solemnity at Red’s talk with Cooper, the abrupt & unsatisfying discussion with Red & Liz where he makes his rEqUESt, all the different “heartfelt” one-on-ones with Liz’s people, the fucking forced af “romance” with K**nler, the shoe-horned “chance meeting” with Beth Ryker, the most Agnes has ever talked in the history of ever, the weirdly morbid & fucking heartbreaking walk in the park, the choppy restaurant scene, to the unmentionable... end event. It went all over the place, which is very unlike TBL imo, which usually seems to stick to a theme or emotional center for an entire episode, whether blacklister or mythology driven. I think it was painfully clear how poor their planning was (when they have literally no excuse bc they knew this was coming the whole season???) & just how much shit they were trying to squeeze into one episode.

Secondly - & this may seem obvious, but I think it’s worth talking about anyway - Liz should have gotten her answers. And I’m not just saying this as a Lizzington shipper (I mean, mostly I am, but there are other reasons also!) Primarily, I think bc... literally everyone expected them. Not just bc they were advertised (it’s certainly not the first time they’ve delighted in false advertising in promos when it comes to the all-important AnSwErS) but bc THEY MADE SURE EVERYONE KNEW BEFOREHAND THAT IT WAS MEGAN’S LAST EP. It might have been mildly acceptable to play coy for yet another season finale IF she was coming back in some capacity later to eventually wrap things up, but - given that they fucking slammed the door on that possibility - THEY SHOULD HAVE GIVEN US ANSWERS. I don’t think anyone considered the possibility that they would KILL her & NOT give us answers bc it makes no fucking sense. Additionally, Liz should have gotten her answers simply bc SHE!! DESERVED!! THEM!! They’re literally the thing she’s been fighting for for eight seasons & she fucking died without them? WTF??? But, most importantly to us Lizzington shippers, Liz not getting her answers ruined the park fantasy. I think we all imagined (BC IT WAS MEGAN’S LAST EP) that Red & Liz would finally talk & Red would give her the answers she wanted. I think we all expected from the (misleading) promo that he would make some sense out of the potentially jumbled memories/visions (?) from 8.21 &, most importantly, there would be SOME KIND OF EMOTIONAL TURNING POINT, SOME CATHARSIS, AN UNDERSTANDING & RENEWED LOVE BETWEEN THEM DRIVEN BY THE AFOREMENTIONED REVELATIONS (& LOVE OF WHATEVER KIND, MIND YOU, WE WEREN’T PICKY, JUST SOMETHING FOUNDED ON RECONCILIATION & PEACE.) But - bc they denied us that - Liz was still in the dark & waiting on answers for the entire ep, unable to forgive or reconnect with her true feelings for Red (whatever you believe them to be) & this made her reaction to Red’s rEqUeSt ring very hollow & detached, the whole park bench conversation stilted & awkward (on Liz’s end) & - THE WORST PART - it made the whole park fantasy feel FALSE. It cheapened it. Like she was just indulging him, letting him walk with her & play with Agnes & enjoy one more day of life before she indifferently killed him. The one thing we expected to get, should have gotten, & THOUGHT WE WOULD HAVE NO MATTER WHAT ELSE HAPPENED IN THE FINALE was ruined. With the assisted suicide talk beforehand, the almost begrudging acceptance from Liz, the obvious morbid mindset from Red, the song in the background, the context of it all. It put an awful spin we completely didn’t expect on what should have been our beautiful Lizzington park fantasy. And I think that may be the part that hurts the most - the fact that I can only look at gifs of that scene - bc the music & dialogue & context completely undermine what Liz’s fantasy should have been, that she got for just one afternoon, when she was supposed to be happy & at peace with Red & Agnes.

Thirdly, (anyone still there? lolz) the whole “plot” of this episode was fucking nonsensical. Chiefly - & many other people have pointed this out before now - Red would never ask Liz to kill him. I simply call bullshit. No matter how hard they tried to justify it (& boyyyyy, did they try) Red has never wanted Liz to be a killer, criminal, or have to live a life like him. He has canonically said as much. I could maybe buy the whole “taking over his empire” thing as the seasons progressed, but asking Liz to live with the guilt (however slight or delayed) of killing him, after everything they’ve been through together, after she told him she loves him (seasons ago, but the feelings are still there, albeit buried deep)? And thereby launching her (& by extension Agnes) directly into harm’s way as the “new” Concierge of Crime (?), without him there to guide her from the shadows? No way. Bullshit. Also - & @iwouldlovetoeatyourtoast mentioned this first, I believe - the whole idea of it was stupid anyway bc Liz has spent the entire season chasing him, has repeatedly gotten opportunities to take the big shot, & has always been unable to kill him. It wasn’t even an engaging tWiSt to throw in at the very end bc - even when she agreed to do it - we all knew it wouldn’t happen, also bc Megan was the one leaving & not James. So, it wasn’t a surprise when she broke down at the end & said she couldn’t, so wtf was the point?

Fourthly (almost to the end, god this feels good) & this was a huge tell imo - everyone was OOC. Now you might say that’s the bitterness talking & you might be right... but you fucking try & tell me that 1) Red all of a sudden decides he’s ready for death after how long of not accepting it or mentioning it & absolutely must be killed by Liz & no one else within the next 24-48 hours 2) Liz would willingly go along with that for even a second 3) Dembe wouldn’t try his damnedest to talk Red out of assisted suicide in general & especially coercing Liz into doing it 4) Ressler would be the one to fucking figure it out & hightail it out of bed AFTER BEING ON DEATH’S DOOR WITH A BUSTED LUNG & SEPSIS FFS 5) Wolf Man Van Dyke would even know where to find Liz on a random fucking street corner outside a random fucking restaurant 6) Red wouldn’t see him behind Liz taking aim 7) THERE WOULDN’T BE A DECLARATION OF FEELINGS/LOVE CONFESSION BETWEEN RED & LIZ IN THE 14 MILLION OBVIOUS PLACES THERE COULD HAVE BEEN *PRIMARILY AFTER SHE SAYS “I CAN’T DO IT, I DON’T WANT TO” I MEAN, HELLO????? WTF, WHY WASN’T THERE AN “BC I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU TOO, LIZZIE” LIKE HOW HARD WOULD THAT HAVE BEEN, IT WAS THE PERFECT PLACE, THE LAST CHANCE, & WE FUCKING DESERVED ITTTTTTTTTTT *ahem* & lastly, & most importantly, & I’m definitely going to cry typing this... 8) if you fucking try to tell me that Red would allow himself to be pulled away from Lizzie’s dead body for a second time by Dembe or anyone else (especially when it was only the stupid task force arriving???) without simply crossing the street to load his gun with trembling fingers, pull the trigger, & join her... you’re fucking crazy.

In conclusion, bc this has gone on long enough, this was just... a hasty, sloppy, rushed, unprepared, careless ending on all fronts, no matter how hard they tried to convince us it was totally-100%-on-purpose-of-course-why-do-you-ask? (And I’m not even touching on the Redarina bait bc fuck that shit.) Like, did anyone else feel like when Red was telling Dembe that he was sure & this was what he wanted & really he’s positive so please stop asking, and when he was explaining things to Liz in almost too much detail, and when he was telling Harold this was absolutely necessary... that it was really the writers trying to convince us? It just felt so sudden & forced & heavy-handed & absurdly preventable & at the same time ridiculously unstoppable... I mean, look, whatever drama clearly went on behind the scenes? I think we can all agree that they did a terrible, awful, shit-tastic job on all fronts. And it’s just such a shame that that’s how it ended 💔

74 notes · View notes

wenamedthedogkylo · 2 years

Text

After over a week of rewatching most of Campaign 3 (and skimming for the info I needed in the episodes I didn’t rewatch in full), as well as regularly cross-referencing with the CR wiki and CritRoleStats when needed, I’m starting to put together my wholly-unnecessary, absolutely massive meta post of half-baked theories and conspiracy rambling.

As I was doing so, I realized I needed to have at least a little bit of a guide for some terms and shorthand that I’ve been using. But if I added that to the post itself, it would end up being even longer than I already know it’s going to be. And that would be a pain in everyone’s asses, including mine. So, separate post it is. Consider this...

Bree’s Glossary of Shorthand and Useful Terms to Understand Their Batshit Meta about Critical Role Campaign 3

Spoilers ahead for pretty much all of C3 up to Ep 14, so if you’re not all the way caught up... you’ve been warned.

First order of business...

The Gang

I’m still referring to the party as “The Gang” for a couple of reasons.

For most of the campaign that my meta is gonna cover, they didn’t have a name, and constantly saying “the as-yet-to-be-named whatevers” is too long. But I also don’t wanna retroactively apply a name they hadn’t settled into yet. Wouldn’t feel right to me.

Until we get truly official confirmation, I’m personally not convinced that they’ve actually settled on Bell’s Hells as their name. Even when they went to toast it, there was still some discrepancy in how they talked about it. Imogen said Bell’s Hells, Laudna said Bell’s Hellions, and no one else in the group really chimed in to say a resounding “yes” to either name. That could easily be because they were still shaken from the aftermath of the ball, and from the fact that Dorian was leaving them. But given the fact that...

Their track record of committing to a name is so shaky, I’m still not sure they’re set on it. If not everyone gives a very enthusiastic agreement, how can we be sure that’s really what they’re going with? Several of them really liked “the New Nobodies” for a bit, until Ashton finally said that they really didn’t think that was a good idea.

Finally—and this is a very personal opinion that I’m sure many people will disagree with—I just am not a huge fan of the name at present. “Bell’s Hells” feels really clunky and weird to me. I know it’s a play on the phrase “hell’s bells”, but something about reversing the words just feels kinda wrong. Now obviously if that is truly what they settle on, I’m sure I will get over it and even come to love it. After all, it’s their game, not mine or anyone else’s. So whatever makes them happy. But until it’s truly set in stone, I’m holding out hope for something a little bit better.

So until someone from the cast says something in an official post, or until they make it official in the next episode, they are still the Gang as far as my meta up to this point is concerned. Moving on!

Other Stuff

FUSCs: These are the Fucked Up Shade Creepers. We know they’re very distinct from normal shade creepers, and I don’t wanna type all that out over and over. So... FUSCs.

AeSp: Aerie Spire

CoSp: Core Spire

LaSp: Lantern Spire

LuSp: Lucent Spire

SmSp: Smolder Spire

SBF: Spire by Fire Inn (Core Spire)

WW: the Weary Way Tavern (Lantern Spire)

S&S: the Soot & Swill Tavern (Smolder Spire)

PC: Paragon’s Call

PT: Prudaj Textiles (Core Spire)

DST: Dreamscape Theater

SMG: Stone Mason’s Guild (under House Treshi)

GG: Gold Guild (under House Treshi)

The Ball: what it says on the package; I’m noting this because that event literally ever had a specific fancy name, so this is how I’m gonna address it lol

A lot of this will probably be quite self-explanatory and even obvious in context. But just in case, I thought it prudent to have it outlined somewhere for people to reference. And of course it’ll be linked in the actual post when I publish it.

... I have way too much time on my hands for all of this, in case you couldn’t tell skdjfhsdk

#Critical Role #campaign 3 #critical role meta #critical role theory #c3 meta #c3 theory #Bree's stuff #about me #about Bree

11 notes · View notes

ladyc0312 · 4 years

Text

A Jikook Guide to RunBTS: 66-80

Things in this batch start out a little slow, KM-wise, but seriously pick up around the Toronto episodes. It features the episodes where both RM and Jin ask if JK and JM are a couple, so it includes the giggly hand-push game that helped make me a jikook believer!

As usual, let me know if I’ve missed anything or should take another look at something. :)

Ep 66 "BTS in a Comic Book Cafe Part 1" (Ep: 2 / KM: 1)

The one that I can’t help but feel would be more fun if I was more familiar with the comics involved, but the guys make it cute anyway

3:08 - This is a little hard to see because they use weird angles and cuts, but JK sings a piece of a theme song and JM catches his eye and sings with him.

9:23 - JK leans in over JM's shoulder to see how many people are on the comic book page

10:18 - JM does the same when it's JK's turn

BEHIND 10:29 - JM jokes around with JK and does the playful chest tap thing

Ep 67 "BTS in a Comic Book Cafe Part 2" (Ep: 3 / KM: 1)

None

BEHIND 7:28 - JM asks JK if there's a comic book he wants and says he'll buy it for him if so

Ep 68 "Heart Pang" (Ep: 1 / KM: 0)

The one where I can't for the life of me understand the board game they are playing

None.

Ep 69 "BTS in Toronto Part 1" (Ep: 4 / KM: 5)

The Toronto one where Jikook wear matching denim shirts while going to Niagara Falls, getting lunch, and playing games

2:36 - RM says there are certain people who will struggle with the wake up challenge. JK and JM readily seem to admit it's them.

6:29 - JM hangs back (to walk with JK?) when the rest of the group starts heading for the Falls.

8:06 - There's a "teleporting" moment where Jin is in between JM and JK, then the camera cuts away, then it comes back and jikook are next to each other. They stay next to each other as they walk on.

9:52 - You can see jikook interacting in the background.

12:25 - JM takes a photo of JK and gets him to giggle, then they huddle to look at the pic.

13:56 - JM puts his arm around JK and takes a selca in the background, causing RM to ask "what, are you a couple or something? Both wearing denim shirts?" He says it fairly seriously for a line that seems like it's supposed to be a joke and they don't laugh or say anything in response - it looks like JM looks away and flips his hair while JK shifts and awkwardly rubs his forehead. You can also see a quiet exchange after between RM and JM where RM says no to something, then nods at JK. Unclear if it's related, but including it just in case.

15:25 - JK doesnn't try to distract JM while he did the staring contest like he did with Hobi. When Jimin passes, JK is the only one to clap.

18:04 - Quick moment where you can see JK start to rub the arm of JM's shirt before the camera cuts away.

18:50 - JM laughs and touches JK's chest after JK loses the rocks paper scissor game, too.

19:53 - When the other five walk away and JK is doing something with his mic, we don't see where JM is.

22:02 - JK appears to help JM with something with his camera in the foreground.

BEHIND 4:12 - After JHope scolds JK for letting Suga pour everyone's water, JK goes to pour JM some water, then puts the pitcher down. JM seemingly tries to help him out by saying it's a new trend for the oldest to pour water.

Ep 70 "BTS in Toronto Part 2" (Ep: 3 / KM: 5)

The Toronto one where the guys go shopping, pick beds, and play games

1:15 - JK slows down to walk side by side with JM.

2:00 - When JK messes up the game he was confident he'd win, JK laughs and playfully shoves at his chest.

7:23 - When JK loses a game and has to buy the others hoodies, JM sneaks a hat into the pile while JK has his back turned. RM rats him out.

8:01 - JM quietly puts the hat back in the pile, then walks over and hugs JK.

8:40 - JK walks over to Jimin to show him something (sunglasses he wanted?).

20:30 - When they're all joking around about whether they can fit four people on a bed, JK moves JM into an L-shape and then lays down nested with him.

BEHIND 0:09 - JK calls out "Jimin-ssi!" and tosses JM that hat he bought him.

4:49 - When the guys are all stretching and JM is in an inconvenient place, JK calls him "Jimin-ssi" again, essentially feels up his calf, and then pushes his upper thigh, all purportedly to get him to move over.

5:28 - JK kneels down behind JM, who's on all fours, and holds his hips to correct his position (I am literally just describing what happens in the clip, but I kind of feel like I'm writing porn, here...). JK then picks Jimin up to move him over a bit. Both giggle as JK starts to stand up and then the camera cuts away. I can't even begin to think what exercising looks like for these two when there aren't cameras on them...

6:55 - JK reads out the words on the Jimin shirt they're all wearing, which happen to be, "BTS Park Jimin, I love you! I root for you! I'm ARMY!" with a huge grin on his face. Jimin laughs - no one else does - and then jokes that they should wear the shirts back to Korea, prompting JK to tell him "bye!" and wave while giggling.

7:37 - Jimin shows the parts of the shirt design he would change by poking JK's chest, and then JK and JM share a fairly steamy look until RM interrupts.

7:52 - JK folds up the shirt so JM's face looks weird and Jimin points to him doing it and laughs. No one else does. Man, these two were really in their own world this whole Toronto trip, weren't they?

8:02 - JM tries to give JK some advice on the game he's about to play. Before starting, JK starts what seems like it's going to be a silly pose, but ends up being him dragging his fingers down his face, neck, and chest. Sadly for JK, JM wasn't looking. Happily for us, we can look as much as we want.

8:18 - When JM wins a game, JK claps for him. You can probably guess by now that he's the only one who does.

10:09 - JM steals a piece of steak, then JK does some cross-cut teleporting to come over and sink down into a chair next to him. JM overdoes making his eyes look big and innocent (perhaps hoping to get caught and scolded?).

10:35 - JM makes Jin move when he takes JM's seat next to JK I feel like just the Behind for this episode needs it's own jikook rating! And most of it is watching JK lead the guys in a workout. If you're going to watch just one Run Behind, consider making it this one!

Ep 71 "BTS in Toronto Part 3" (Ep: 3 / KM: 3)

The Toronto one where the guys have dinner, have breakfast, and play games

14:28 - Maybe nothing, but just to note it - in this and the next shot, you can see JM heading towards where JK is lying back on the couch after losing a game, then there's an abrupt cut and everyone is in a totally different position.

29:20 - JK tells JM the "super-pancake" he made is for him since he has to do the penalties.

BEHIND 6:59 - JM says that he thinks JK will want to eat and calls out for him.

Ep 72 "BTS and Mafia" (Ep: 3 / KM: 2)

The one in which we learn that BTS is so terrible at the Mafia game that it almost comes back around to being impressive

3:10 - When Jin says JK is suspicious because he isn't talking, JM defends him, saying "you know he doesn't talk much."

8:34 - JM seems to direct his appeal to be spared to JK.

18:16 - JK compliments how well Jimin is doing at the game.

20:13 - After Jimin says he's ARMY, JK asks, "do you like me that much?" Then there's a quick cut and Jin is doing a Jim Halpert face at the camera.

28:03 - Confusing maybe-moment - let me know if it's clearer to anyone else! - but after JH is sending finger heart guns, JM points gun fingers directly at JK for no apparent reason.

BEHIND 2:39 - Before they start playing, JK predicts that JM and Jin will be good at the game.

Eps 73-76 “Run BTS Drama Parts 1-4″ (n/a)

The ones where BTS spend four episodes making a “comedic” skit

01:09 - After JK explains that he had a wisdom tooth taken out, Jimin adds the info that they had to take out the whole root. 09:10 - Even though V is the "director" of Jimin's scene, JK speaks up and takes over the role, saying that directors use informal language and repeating twice in informal language "Jimin, let's go!" He continues speaking informally when Jimin messes up and JK scolds him. 11:40 - When it's JK's turn to deliver a line and he gets nervous about remembering it, JM reads it out loud for him. He also says as soon as JK delivers the line that he did the best job and adds to Hobi, "he doesn't get embarassed, I told you." 16:26 - It's a little hard to see for sure, but it looks like Jimin votes for JK when it's time to choose who should be the skit's director. I'm going to be totally honest with you guys - I didn't rewatch these episodes past this. I first saw it months ago and remember being disappointed and fairly bored through most of it past the first half of the first episode - I don't find the skit funny and the behind-the-scenes stuff isn't amusing enough to make a four-part episode about. I’m sure there are others who completely disagree with me and no judgment if you don't share my opinion! But I'm doing this guide for fun and I don't want to spend two hours rewatching them.

I don't recall a ton of jikook beyond the above - I think there's a moment in part 3 where JK is getting tired and Jimin offers to take over slating for him. So, anyone who is a fan and knows / finds more jikook moments, please let me know and I will update this guide to reflect that. Otherwise, let's happily move along. :)

Ep 77 “Food Guest Part 1″ (Ep: 4 / KM: 5)

The weirdly-named ones that are prob better translated as "food connoisseurs" but the specifics of the foods theme don't really matter because JIKOOK

07:41 - When Jin says JK and JM will be competing in a palm-push game, JM says he's already lost (because JK is strong).

07:55 - I'm fairly certain that, if you're a jikook-er, you've seen this moment. It's so unabashedly flirty a description can't really do it justice. JK and JM are supposed to be playing a game where they put their palms together and shove to see who can make the other lose their balance. JM shoves lightly at JK's chest before they even start the game, then both start giggling. Still giggly, JM asks if JK's ready and JK says he is. JM pushes at JK's palms and JK just swings his arms back as they look at each other and smile. Jin interrupts to ask, "are you a dating couple?" (that's the most direct translation - V app translation is "are you two together?"). JK and JM both laugh, the latter so hard that he spins around, thus losing the game.

17:08 - JK is staring so intently at Jimin on his knees with a blow-pen in his mouth that he completely misses RM trying to give him a high five. Jin has to call for JK to please respond to RM before JK looks away and returns the high five, laughing and apologizing. He looks back immediately after.

BEHIND 0:58 - JK gives JM a shoulder massage while holding his chest as JM makes satisfied noises. I've seen this clip in compilations before, but hadn't realized it was also from this episode. It's really the gift that keeps on giving!

4:29 - Just prior to the above palm-push game, JM reaches out to do something to JK's sleeve (I think?). The camera cuts before we see clearly.

4:31 - Slightly different angle of JM and JK giggling at the start of the palm-push game.

7:11 - Reveals that RM actually tried to high five JK and was ignored TWICE before Jin called JK's attention away from JM on his knees with a blow-pen in his mouth.

Ep 78 “Food Guest Part 2″ (Ep: 3 / KM: 3)

15:00 - JK jokingly asks what the answer is and Jimin giggles at him as the on-screen text says, "how adorable." Unsurprisingly, the others are less enamored. (JK's biggest fans = 1. Jimin 2. Run BTS on-screen text writers)

BEHIND 9:56 - JK watches JM dance playfully, then wiggles his own hips, seeming to want JM's attention. Jimin smiles and starts to say something that gets cut off.

10:03 - JK films JM as JM dances and smiles while looking into the camera. Jimin is doing silly dance, but JK zooms in on his joyful face. He quickly licks his lips as he watches.

#jikook #kookmin #jikook guide to run bts #run bts

147 notes · View notes

impossiblelibrary · 3 years

Text

Today's rant brought to you by: Queer Eye Japan, can we all just try to be as kind as they try to be?

After watching the Queer Eye Japan super short season, I wanted to google to see the overall reaction to the show, make sure that my western eyes were correct in seeing the care that was given to the culture. Were cultural taboos, other than being outwardly gay, crossed? So I find this article in the top results and other than the perspective, why tho? Tokyoesque.com had an article with a higher reading level, with surface level appreciation but at least better written.

I can't get over this hate article though. Unfounded, dumb, wrong and incorrect. Do not go forward unless you like that blistering kind of anger from me.

But the reasons just get weaker as the article extends: "Hurts the country it set out to save?" Looking for white savior much? They did not go to save Japan, they gave some free shit to like 4-5 people, think smaller.

Their culture guide wasn't gay enough.

You want to suggest any lgbt insta models or celebrities, use your platform to raises some up?

"There is a growing sexless culture in Japan for married and unmarried people, and it is perilous watching Queer Eye present this without any context behind what is driving this behavior."

Sexiness is what the fab 5 embrace, unfortunately and it was probably discussed behind the scenes of how much talking about sex was allowed or polite and the conversation of not having sex is closer to the tip of the tongue rather than the feeling of sexiness. The West is not the ones blasting that information. It is across multiple Japanese printed newspapers and online stories by now and the "context" is still being discussed and debated amongst Japanese. So I don't think any outsiders should be weighing in or "explaining" this phenomenon. We can repeat what we have been told but guessing at the reasons is not our place. The reasons illustrated by the author of the article seem lacking, a take but not the only one, but who am I to speak on that being in a sexual relationship with someone who pulls from that culture?

Kiko begins to lecture Yoko-san on how she “threw away her womanhood” (referring to a Japanese idiom, onna wo suteru) by going makeup-free and wearing drab, shapeless clothes.

The mistranslation by the subtitles fixed by this author was necessary information. But Kiko didn't lecture her on it, it was brought up by Yoko before any of them arrived, that was her theme, that was what she had decided to focus on. Meanwhile, if you watched Jonathan, he understood there was no time to spend on makeup and skincare so provided her a one instrument, 3 points of color on the skin to feel prettier. That and the entire episode being the 5 treating her like a woman on a date, not trying to hook her up, which is what they did in American eps.

"In teaching a Japanese woman, who already struggles to find time for herself, how to make an English recipe, Antoni is making great TV and nothing more."

So Antoni shouldn't have taught her apple pie because it's too exotic for a Japanese woman. (Can you smell the sexism?)

He didn't make an apple pie, altho Yoko did mention her mother made that for her when she was a kid. He made an apple tartine after going to a Japanese bakery who makes that all the time. Then highlighted the apples came from Fuji in true Japanese media fashion. Honey, American television doesn't usually highlight where the ingredients come from. A Japanese producer told him to do that. So all worries handled within the same ep. She got Japanese ingredients, had the recipe shown to her and then made it for her friends in her own house. Did the author actually watch this show or nah?

"beaten over the head with his western self-help logic. “You have to live for yourself,” he says."

The style of build up the 5 went for was confrontational but in a "I'm fighting for you" way. It's hard to describe, but the best I can say is, a person has multiple voices in their head, from parents, siblings, society, and maybe themselves. By being loud and obnoxious, American staples right there, they are adding one more voice. You deserve this, you are amazing, you are worth it. I know this is against most Japanese cultural modesty, but maybe it shouldn't be.

Sarcasm lies ahead:

Apparently: mispronunciation is microaggressions, not just someone who had a sucky school system. Yea okay, They're laughing at the language not at how stumbling these monolinguals are with visiting another country. Mmhm. Japanese don't say I love you and don't touch and that should stay that way instead of maybe, once in awhile, feeling like they can hug. Yeah, let's just ignore Yoko's break down that she had never hugged her lifelong friend after hugging strangers multiple times. Maid cafes are never sexualized in Japan ever, just don't go down that one street in Akihabara where the men are led off by the hand sheepishly blushing. Gag me. And Japanese men love to cry in front of their wives and would never break down once the wife leaves. I have never seen a Japanese movie showcase that move. Grr.

"I identify as many cultures."

So you're a Japanese man when it's convenient for you to get an article published? Are you nationally Japanese or just ethnically or culturally?

Homeland is an inherently racist word?

"After the Bush administration created the Department of Homeland Security after the 9/11 terrorist attacks, a Republican consultant and speechwriter Peggy Noonan urged, “the name Homeland Security grates on a lot of people, understandably. Homeland isn’t really an American word, it’s not something we used to say or say now.”

Yes, let's use a Washington Post article rather than a etymology professor. Yes, the google search results increased after 2001 Homeland Security was used but the word has been around since the 1660s and I've read multiple turn of the century lit on white people returning to their homeland, i.e. the town off the coast they were born in.

"But" is not disagreeing. I think the repeated offender for the author is the not acknowledging the makeover-ees feelings. But, that is how LGBT have decided to deal with the inner voices that invade from society. They are just that, not our own, they are the influence of society, and we can choose, we have to choose, to be influenced by someone, anyone else.

Karamo can't speak about being black when an Asian is speaking about being Asian, even though the Asian gay man was feeling alone. It's called relating bitches, and I'm done with people saying that is redirecting the conversation, it's extending the conversation. That's how we talk, the spotlight is shared, especially when someone's about to cry and doesn't want to be seen as crying, time to turn the spotlight.

The gay monk wasn't good enough, you should have invited the gay politician.

Yeah, causes I'm sure a politician has all the time in the world for a quick stint and cry. They picked a Japanese monk who travels to NY because they had a guest who travels to the West too. Did you want him to stop traveling back and forth? Did you want a pure, ethnic and cultural Japanese gay man who has no ties to the west to talk to this Western educated young man? Seriously?

This is just not how it works in Japan.

Being in a multi-cultural marriage between two rebels, discussions on facets of culture are plenty in my household. Culture should be respected enough to be considered but not held on a pedestal like we should never adjust or throw some things out. LGBT being quiet and private for instance. "Being seen" was Jonathan's advice, and a good one especially for a Japanese gay man that was called feminine since he was a kid. Some gay men can hide, but as Jonathan said, he couldn't hide what he was, he couldn't hide this. So fuck it. Don't hide. It's actually more dangerous for a feminine man to come off as anxious rather than gay and proud. It makes you more of a target if they think you won't fight back. Proud means, Imma throw hands too, bitch.

This is also from the civil rights playbook going back to Black America: never hold a protest or a fight without the cameras, without being seen. LGBT have found the more seen they are, in media, in the streets, the better off we are. When LGBT Americans were being "private" about our lifestyles, we died, a la 1980s. They won't care if you start dying off if they never saw you to begin with.

And hence why I think the author's real anger is from these 5 being seen dancing flamboyantly in Shibuya, in Harajuku, afforded the privilege of doing this safely because of their tourist status, cameras and very low violence rate in Tokyo, loud and obnoxiously. Honestly, they wouldn't have been invited or nominated if they didn't want that brash American-ness coming into their home, just for a taste, at least.

Here's my real anger, my own jealousy: Japan's queer community currently does not have marriage or adoption rights. US does, so we have progressed further. But we are also not that many years from being tied to cow fences with barbed wire, beaten with baseball bats and left for dead overnight. If things are so bad over there, maybe take a few pages from the civil right playbook we took so much time to perfect and produced by the Black Americans who fought first. But so far, I only hear loss of jobs and marriages, which we still have here too. Stop trying to divide us, we are one community, LGBT around the world and we are here to try to help. Take it or leave it, it's not like we're going to go organize your own Pride parade for you.

Rant over? I guess. Is this important enough to be put in the google results along with his. Hell no, anyone with half a mind can see he's reaching more than half the time. And any argument about: this wasn't covered! There are a shit ton of conversations that are not covered in the 45 min they have. They are not a civil rights show, it's a makeover show, doing their best in that direction anyway. Know what it is.

Next blog post, what research I would guess was happening behind the scenes for each of the 5? I'm pretty sure I saw Jonathan doing Japanese style makeup there...

#queer eye #Queer eye Japan #original #rant

38 notes · View notes

scream-into-the-voiddd · 4 years

Text

the writing style of dt17

Hi there I am bored and a bit sick so I have decided to go on a huge rant/ break down about the “writing style” of Ducktales 2017.

the writing on the show is fantastic and is wonderful example of masterful writing, in both character and mystery’s. So after re-watching the show (again) I have put together the basic formula that the seasons have.

first things first, I have to explain the difference between a Plot line and a Story line. now these terms in this context, means that a ‘story line’ can out live a ‘plot line’.let me beak it down.

---------------------------------------

in Season one,

the Plot line-

Magica de spell made Lena and she got close to the family to steal scrooges dime and free Magica.

with me so far, now.

the Story Line -

is about a family coming back together after years apart.

-----------------------------------------

now even when the ‘plot’ is not around the ‘story’ still continues. So each episode focuses on one or both of these elements.

How do they do that? simple, character focus.

both the ‘plot line’ and the ‘story line’ are embodied by one to two characters (as the focus)

in season one the plot focused character was Lena.

meaning that whenever she showed up in s1 the audience knew that something plot related is going to happen. Lena pushed the s1 plot line forward with every appearance, until the every last episode of s1.

she was the connection to Magica, she was the one with the ‘plot secret’ and it was reviled with her character.

simple enough.

the characters pushing the story line in s1 were

Dewey and Scrooge,

Dewey in particular was the one pushing the ‘story line’ as he (and webby) was the one most involved with finding out WHY the family had been apart so long (why and how his mother was missing).

so whenever an episode focused on Dewey the audience knew that the ‘story line’ was moving forward. the way Scrooge fits into this is what makes the writing on this show so damn amazing.

the way dt17 uses characters to play off not just each other but the story is what makes it all so impressive.

Scrooge in s1 was ‘holding all the cards’ as it were as he already knew how the whole thing happened BUT when it is revealed and the audience, like Dewey thinks we have all the answers this happens

Here (4 mins in)

youtube

we (the audience) think the story is over the truth that Dewey (we) wanted was reviled but at the last turn, we find out the story is not over, that there in another peace that was missing. why scrooge pushed everyone away in the first place. this showed that the story was not over, and that there was more to it then anyone realised. ok so we know that s1 ends with both the story line and plot line merging and then concluding at the same time. the family came back together to beat De Spell (but they would have come back regardless which is important to the story line)

ok so that was season one

Season Two

has a similar formula in that it also uses characters as focuses points for both plot and story.

The plot line-

of season 2 is, that the moon is trying to invade earth and made it into a moon.

the story line-

is about Della finding and reconnecting with her kids.

the focus of this season is a little different though as the plot is not driven by a single person like last time but a location.

the Moon

whenever the moon was given focus it moved the plot along regardless of who it was following. weather is was

- Della

- Penny

- Lunarus

-Donald

the location is what made episode plot related not just the characters themselves per say, same as s1 whenever the moon showed up the audience knew it was plot related in some way.

moving on to the Story line focus of s2 was

Louie and Della

Louie’s arc in s2 (which i will expand later) is basically him finding how he fits into the family and what his ability’s are.

Della’s as stated above is about finding and reconnecting with her boys,

Della is was connects the story line to the plot line this season as she was the character involved in both. the consultation point of both the story and plot is in the scene pictured about.

Here

youtube

this sealed the connection between Della and Louie and lead into them all ‘rejoining’ the plot.

thus concluding season 2′s story and plot.

------------------

Now with all of that in mind what does this say about s3 and how it does and does not fit this formula.

so far it does fit this formula as each of the seasons starts with an episode about the “Story Line” which focuses on one of the boy’s

what do I mean,

s1 (for sack of agreement lets say woo-woo and the Atlantis ep are one ep)

the first ep focused on Dewey and how he wanted to show how daring and bold he is but that gets him into trouble for not thinking anything through, but it also shows that Dewey is emotionally in touch with himself and others like when he tells Donald all he can do is let go and trust him.

the frist ep is the game night and how Louie feels like he doesn’t fit in and that he feels useless, but the ep shows what his, ability's really are “seeing all the angles” and how he can use it to befit himself and his family.

both of these eps shows the boy’s strengths and weakness

Dewey -

pro - Brave, adventures, emotionally aware

con- don’t think things through, brash, attention starved

-------------

Louie-

Pro- is a thinker and a planner, smart in a business way, and understands the people around him

con- insecure about his place in the family, greedy (in a kid way tho), can be manipulative

---------------

now this leads us to s3

the plot of season 3 is simple enough

FOWL wants to steal the world.

that it, how remains to be seem.

the story line is most likely set up in ep one that was about Huey,

and how his greatest weakness are

- having no guide

- failure

-anger (the duck family anger is strongest in him)

- fear of not knowing what to do/ what is out there

- his self worth is fragile (no woodchucks “no him” idea)

- making bad choices under pressure

but mostly Accepting Change (he can’t understand)

but his strengths are

- humble (in defeat)

- willing to try anything

- can admit when wrong

-smart and capable when claim

- makes good friends easier then the other main kids (as Boyd and Violet became friends with Huey much faster and both of them are good kids, unlike say Doofus and Louie and Lena (at first) for Webby, point is Huey didn’t have to change them (lena) or get way from them (doofus))

now how will this tie into the plot? no idea. but none of the other two seasons tied that in, until at least halfway through the season anyway.

but this does give us a look into the story line of this season might be about.

the next question is who is the other character Huey will be ‘bounce off of’ in the story line, and so far I think that it is either

- Donald

- Launchpad

as Lp was give plot focus in ep 3, and Donald was given character focus in both ep 2 and 5.

so atm my money is on Donald in the story line part of this season.

now what is the conflict here? or what could it be?

looking back at the last 2 seasons the story conflict is shown in each focus character.

s1- Dewey asking questions and Scrooge having the answer

s2- Louie trying to “fit into” the family/ find himself and Della trying to space her her past idea’s into the family

(ep. “Louie should stop scheming” as appose to “I will show you the scheme with/for the family”)

so if s3 follows suit the story line might be something like.

Donald wants to ‘move on’ with his life but Huey want things to stay as they are.

Donald wants to have a life outside of his family which he has not been able to do for 10 years or so, due to raising the boys by himself. but now that Della and Scrooge are back in the picture Donald can spread his wings. He got the band back together and is finding love (Daisy) so he may want to leave the house boat and travel with his friends and Daisy, without the family (not all at once tho).

so Huey might freak out at these changes as Donald is the one contain in his life. never changing always the same uncle Donald, until now

but i can’t say for sure that’s just one idea.

it could be that Huey might feel that he failed Donald somehow?

that Huey makes a bad choice under pressure and that makes Donald upset at him?

Huey could have an out burst at Donald that leads to a riff between them?

the point is, that the story line this season is going to be looking at Huey in away we have not seen him before.

Angry and unsure.

and depending on who “Huey’s nemesis” turns out to be (as hinted at by show runners) that is what will shape the rest of the season 3 ‘story line’.

is it a FOWL villain

like say Gandra or Funzo

or is it a personal one like

Daisy (for “taking” Donald away), Gosalyn (as she was meant to be in the first ep and not violet) or even Donald (idk)

but this show is just so well put together and written that whatever the case is its going to be good.

134 notes · View notes

weedwhoreswitchcraftwriter · 3 years

Text

Controversial and stigmatized beliefs, propaganda- also known as uh, complete and utter bullshit.

While I was brainstorming this morning, it got me thinking- “Why don’t I do a blog about my top three topics that I have the strongest, beliefs and experience in?”

Today, it’s time we discussed some Drugs, Satanism, and Sex (Work), where you could damn near say that I am as close to an expert on, as expertise gets.

Plus, I figured, why the fuck shouldn’t I break down the stigmatized ignorant belief systems and stereotypes about some of the most misunderstood topics to date?

Welcome to todays episode of: Satan, Sex, Secrets! Fuck Your Stigma: Ep. #1!

Get ready to get fucking schooled, because today, we are going to get raw and in-depth.

Because today, we are going to debunk the most common stigmatized misconceptions about three of the most taboo topics to date- we are talking about Satanism, Sex/Work, and some top secret truths behind these severely misunderstood topics.

Trust me, I would know, as I personally am a Satanist, Sex Worker, and Sex Advocate and Addict…

Stigma, Propaganda, Ignorance. What do these three things have in common, you ask?

They all have one for sure thing in common: they are all fucking loads of bullshit. it can come in endless shapes, and sizes. Sometimes though, it comes in the shape of someone we trust more than anything, in the news, and also in Christianity- but we will, as always, get to that later on.

Well, I suppose I should begin with what prompted me to write this piece, specifically. What prompted me to write this right now was a very motivating,(I feel motivated, anyway!) fucking email, one that speaks to every belief I have in my very existence.

Say the biggest of hellos to the newest fucking member of… THE SATANIC TEMPLE!

Now, let me be crystal clear here, The Satanic Temple, and Satanism overall, is ignorantly misunderstood as fuck. People will read or hear the word Satan-anything, and automatically lose their fucking shit, no bullshit (the people out there that have no common sense to educate themselves before establishing a “belief system”, if you can even call it that.)!

The. Satanic. Temple. Does. Not. Worship. SATAN!!!

A bit shocking, I know.

Here are some very useful facts about The Satanic Temple, as well as Satanism overall-

Let’s Talk Satanism!

Let me start this off, with some useful facts about The Satanic Temple- more specifically, facts directly from TST themselves:

“The Mission of The Satanic Temple is to Encourage Benevolence and Empathy, Reject Tyrannical Authority, Advocate Practical Common Sense, Oppose Injustice, and to Undertake Noble Pursuits.”

Now… let’s compare the mission of The Satanic Temple, vs. the mission of “Christianity”- The Seven Fundamental Tenets vs. The Ten Commandments.

The Seven Fundamental Tenets of TST are as follows: And then there would be The Ten Commandments … But first, let me just say, that is was fucking impossible to even find two versions of Christianity’s Ten Commandments!

I have some very strong beliefs on the topic of Christianity, if I am being honest here.

Although, my beliefs stem from factual evidence and experience, so I do believe I am more than qualified to share them.

Anyways, The Ten Commandments are as follows:

1. I am the Lord your God: You shall not have strange Gods before me.

2. You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain.

3. Remember to keep holy the Lord’s Day.

4. Honor your father and mother.

5. You shall not kill.

6. You shall not commit adultery.

7. You shall not steal.

8. You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.

9. You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife.

10. You shall not covet your neighbor’s goods.

From https://www.catholic.com/magazine/print-edition/the-true-ten-commandments

So, now you’ve read The Ten Commandments. Now, what about The Seven Fundamental Tenets of TST?

I am in the mood to write a little bit extra today. So, let’s get a little controversial.

i. One should strive to act with compassion and empathy toward all creatures in accordance with reason.

ii. The struggle for justice is an ongoing and necessary pursuit that should prevail over laws and institutions.

iii. One’s body is inviolable, subject to one’s own will alone.

iv. The freedoms of others should be respected, including the freedom to offend. To willfully and unjustly encroach upon the freedoms of another is to forgo one’s own.

v. Beliefs should conform to one’s best scientific understanding of the world. One should take care never to distort scientific facts to fit one’s beliefs.

vi. People are fallible. If one makes a mistake, one should do one’s best to rectify it and resolve any harm that might have been caused.

vii. Every tenet is a guiding principle designed to inspire nobility in action and thought. The spirit of compassion, wisdom, and justice should always prevail over the written or spoken word. https://www.thesatanictemple.com

The most amazing reference I have come across so far, would have to be the “Hail Satan” podcast- more specifically though, “The 10 Commandment” Episode, where real members of TST compare these two (it is actually the best fucking thing, ever.)

Highly recommend this, by the way.

Now, The 10 Commandments, on a very honest base level, is so mother-fucking contradictory, not to mention incredibly egotistically and ignorantly designed for gullible humans to fall victim to- and also? Fun-fact: no matter what religion you identify as, it is not some excuse for mysogynistic “belief systems” nor something that should be used for discriminatory actions, something used to “convert sinners”, and LASTLY- “Sinning” is something that is strictly specific to CHRISTIANITY ALONE!

Therefore, it is factually impossible to “convert sinners”, as you technically cannot be a “sinner” if you are not a Christian to begin with- therefore, it would be literally impossible to “save or convert”, anyone outside of the Christian Religion.

Personally, I would say that the latter (TST), is by far more reasonable to follow- not to mention at least TST is consistent- and justifiable at minimum!

Although, everyone is absolutely entitled to their own opinions!

Believe what ever you so desire, but do not force it upon others just because another human being doesn’t follow the same belief system as you do.

If you evaluate TST and Satanism on a base-level, it is far more realistic and reasonable to follow than most would expect!

A very good example of why educating yourself is so fucking important! Ironically, though, members of TST do not even believe in Satan, or the supernatural- at all!

In all honestly, I have always been attracted to the more “taboo/shock value inducing” type of things in life- hence, me being a Stoner, a Sex Worker and Sex Addict, Poly-addict, and now, proudly, a Satanist.

This is going to be, a several-part series!

Stay Tuned…

So, if those of you who are reading this, have any questions, or stigmas you want to have debunked- leave a comment below and ask me anything!

-Haylee the Satanic Sex Working Stoner

#sex blog #sex blogger #short story #success #writeblr #writers on tumblr #writing #witch+prompts #satan #rant blog

5 notes · View notes

0reblogufufu0 · 3 years

Text

Spoilers For IPYTM EP 3 Ahead!

Hi! I’m back from the first thirty minutes with many..mixed? thoughts, I guess you could call it? Let’s just get in to it, because there’s a lot here.

Firstly, I wanted to address more all the hate that came out with this episode. I haven’t got to the part everyone hated yet, but I can see the build up, and have heard people talking about it all day, yelling in the tags behind gifs, and posting angry faced emojis under Nadao’s Instagram posts for the series. I’ve watched a few series’ while they were still coming out, My Engineer, Still 2gether, Color Rush, etc, but I’ve never seen this much hate circulate so fast. People were so upset about the episode before the subs even came out everyone was condemning the director and saying IPYTM as well as it’s predecessor ITSAY was ruined now because of it. I’m not gonna say anyone’s opinion is wrong, especially considering all the negative stuff I’m about to say about the series/the episode, but I wanted to mention this because, whether I meant for it to or not, seeing all of it definitely affected my opinion. Now, for the review. There’s too much here, is the simplest way to describe it. There’s too much here they’re trying to accomplish, trying to establish, trying to break then make over again. I always said since the first review that this format they were going for was going to be hard to work with, but I stuck by it with hope after the first episode, because I thought so long as stuff worked in a compilation like style, even if the story wasn’t the most well developed, we at least were getting what we came for, Teh and Oh-aew’s life and relationship after ITSAY in college. But, this episode, especially compared to the others, is moving much, much slower than that, already breaking the mold, thus making it harder to work with, again. The episode, like every other one, starts with a time skip. I believe this one is 8 months, just like the one at the end of the last episode, but I can’t entirely remember. I at least want to give the series props for sticking by the problems it brought up last episode in Oh-aew and Teh’s relationship, specifically Teh’s view of the relationship in light of Oh-aew developing as a person away from things like acting and doing spur of the moment things like getting a tattoo. We’re made immediately aware that things have not gotten any better since last episode, and instead have gotten worse. Not just problem wise, but also communication wise between the two. They each have issues in their relationship that instead of relaying with one another they tell their friends in hopes of mending things. The tone jumps around so much this episode, you could sue it for giving you whiplash. Like, I understand why it is all there, but even just the framing between scenes with Teh, scenes with Oh-aew, scenes with Teh and Oh-aew, you feel it immediately each time in a way that is almost awkward, because you jump from homely stuff with Oh-aew and his friends with the backdrop of his insecurities around Teh, to Teh making the most somber expressions ever while he attempts to remember what love feels and looks like while acting. The immediate thought I had when Teh was writing in his journal was how nonchalant he mentions that he loves Oh-aew. Like, of course, something like that is supposed to be a given by now, but it hits me more as a cope than as the truth. He thinks it, writes it down without giving meaning to it, rather saying like he’s convincing himself of it, or comforting himself with the idea of things not being all bad before he adds a ‘but’ and talks about how things have changed. Compared to last episode where Teh’s fear of change causes him to blow up, here, he’s curled in on himself, hiding it from Oh-aew, while he repeats it in his mind over and over, like he’s trying to tell himself to get used to it, but he can’t. He’s obsessing over it so much he can hardly look back on things with Oh-aew because he can’t help but think ‘things aren’t like that anymore’. There’s lots of fear here, not just in the change that has already happened, but also all that he worries will come, like his feelings for Oh-aew changing any more in a way he can’t shrug off. Oh-aew is trying his best to hold things together on his end to, inserting himself wherever he can into Teh’s life to make it easier for him to find space for them in the wake of their passions being different now, and he’s stuck between thinking he shouldn’t push it and that things should be better than they are. I don’t think Teh actually likes Jai, just like everyone else doesn’t. He’s looking at Jai as a comfort, as a constant. It’s hard to think about it properly because of how the time moves so fast, but he’s known Jai for over a year now and Jai has consistently been there guiding him along the way of acting when Khim left and so did Oh-aew. He’s clinging to Jai as a constant unchanging thing, not a person. He’s looking for all he’s lost in Oh-aew, and in Khim to be in him. Now, all this is fine and dandy, on the surface, since it makes sense for the characters and is technically built to, but it’s all so shortly done and everything is going from 11 to 111 so fast you can’t wrap your head around anything concretely. All of it is there, but it is sublte, and again, not properly maintained because of the route the series is taking with time. I said this in the beginning too, that no problems would be able to last for long because of all this, but they’re still trying it and it’s not working very well because everything is fine, then it’s bad, then it’s a little okay, then it’s horrible, all the while the series jumps around over and over. It’s just a mess, really. Gonna be honest though, from the trailers I always thought Oh-aew would have relationship troubles more harshly than Teh, but, here we are! Gonna go finish up the episode now, hopefully it’s not as bad as people say.

#i promised you the moon #ipytm #I

2 notes · View notes

koizumicchi · 4 years

Note

I'm following you, and u keep talking about lipxlip and it made me curious. So I was wonder where do i start? Do i need to follow a specific order?

Hello anon and thank you for the follow!!! This may be late now but nice to meet you!!! And I apologize for this late reply!

It's a bit hard to map out but I'll do my best to make a guide :D This is long so buckle up!

LIP×LIP is an idol unit by HoneyWorks (haniwa for short). Haniwa is a music-inclined group producing their own original songs. The main members are: shito and gom, in charge with the songs, and yamako the main illustrator. There are also other support members like mogelatte and the band members, etc. Haniwa is known for their songs and the MVs they release that tell the stories of their characters. Before, they only upload their videos on nico nico douga (that's where I discovered them but correct me if I'm wrong, anyone) but they have their own youtube channel now.

LIP×LIP is a 2-person idol unit composed of Shibasaki Aizou and Someya Yuujirou. When they debuted, their last names weren't revealed so everyone got used to calling them by their first names. Aizou is the blonde with the hair tie; he is the 'wild' image of LIP×LIP, the cool guy, the sunshine brimming with energy, but in truth, he's resentful and usually seen openly angry at anyone when not in idol mode. Yuujirou is the blue-haired with uneven bangs; he is the calm side of LIP×LIP (like the moon), the gentle tones, the pretty boy; but outside his idol persona, he looks down on others inferior to him, and glares at anyone he doesn't like. Off-cam, he and Aizou don't have a good relationship; they argue and disagree with each other a lot... but they got along somewhere somewhen and are now partners or 'rivals' as they like to put it. They may be two-faced jerks, but trust me, they are valid (once you know where they are coming from) and eventually got better as a person. I'll let you in on a secret: they are soulmates but they just don't realize it yet.

That's basically the general summary. I try to avoid mentioning major spoilers but if you have more questions about them, you can try checking the wikia site and if that's not enough for you, my ask box is always open!

I knew LIP×LIP during their debut period but tbh right now I'm not exactly sure what direction should I point you to XD i guess you can start with their MVs. that's where I got to know them anyway. liplip wasn't that popular at first; they were meant to be side characters, I assume, but the fans love them too much and so LIP×LIP got too powerful and landed several collabs which lead to growing popularity.

MVs (they're on youtube dont worry, just search using their kanji titles) : 1. Romeo - debut, Feb 2017 2. Nonfantasy 3. Hitsuyou Fukkaketsu - only a short mv 4. Koi wo Shiyou - a collab so liplip isnt the focus 5. Yume Fanfare 6. Yappa Saikyou 7. Rodeo 8. Choco Kano 9. Chiisana Lion ft Minami

After Romeo, you can watch these in any order you like since they can stand on their own, except for Yume Fanfare and Yappa Saikyou - those you gotta watch consecutively.

Then there are the other MVs which liplip is featured: Heroine Ikusei Keikaku and Heroine Tarumono, among others. There's also the short drama video wayback in 2017 focusing on Aizou and Yuujirou being a bitch on this girl fresh out of a province (excuse me this makes me laugh everytime i remember it), subbed by Denzero - he has an fb page of the same name and he uploaded it there. Hopefully he hasn't deleted it. Watch it before Nonfantasy for more context.

And then there's the Docchi Kiss episode, released last year. I translated it myself, and with the help of some friends, we were able to sub it! I recommend you watch it after Yume Fanfare since it was released after that MV. You can actually watch it after Romeo (the ep is the making video after all) but I think the 'fanservice' wouldn't be that believable XD and of course the 2 drama tracks featured on docchi kiss!! I've made a sunmary of that as well!

The songs w/o an MV :'(( - Judge - Tsuki no Hime - White Day Kiss - Repaint - Fiancee (also on youtube but sung by vocaloids gumi and miku) - Seika (Yuujirou's solo) - Yellow (Aizou's solo)

I have translated these (except for Fiancee) as well, you can find them under my /translation tag. Please do not omit Seika and Yellow. I cannot stress this enough. That's where you'll understand Aizou and Yuujirou's relationship and their thoughts on each other.

There's also the light novels. I think there are about 3 now? For heroine ikusei keikaku, romeo, and kono sekai no tanoshimikatta. It isnt available atm unless you buy them of course. There are also short stories, written in Japanese but translated from Spanish by Mar @yume-fanfare, you can read them on their blog!

And of course, the big project!!! The anime film!!! Kono Sekai no Tanoshimikatta or How to Enjoy this World, to be released on 25th of December this year! It will reveal their pre-idol days, the audition, the days before and after their debut! You can check /HoneyWorksMovie on twitter for more information. and check out Haru's blog @takanenene for translation of the info. The OP and ED songs for the film, sung by LIPLIP themselves will be released on Dec 23 so we'd probably get an mv or two before that date!

Well, that ends it! Sorry for the lack of photos or direct links; our connection here isn't exactly stable for the past weeks :

#asks #tumblr mobile stop ruining my posts pls #i edited it afshdjd sorry abt that hideous format

13 notes · View notes

rigelmejo · 3 years

Text

April Progress Update, and May Goals:

*bear with me this is gonna get long.

I’m going to first just look at April goals and see if I did them, then afterward summarize everything I did this month (cause it was a lot more than I planned ToT)

Chinese study plan from April:

1. Read anything

Well, I did read. However my goal to read hanshe to chapter 80 and Zhenhun to the end of the sundial arc never happened. I did read a lot though. I ended up focusing mainly on extensive reading.

Chinese chapters read: 62 (I counted graded readers/小王子 as 1 chapter for every two that I read, but this number is probably still inflated... compared to my normal 20-pleco page chapters I probably read 31-40 of those-kind-of-chapters length wise).

Chinese stories finished: 4 (Pleco Graded Reader Butterfly Lovers, Chinese Short Stories, Mandarin Companion Journey to the Center of the Earth, 小王子 - you can tell this is where my attention went this month).

Chinese Listening Reading Method chapters done: 14.5 (4.5 Silent Reading, 2 Chapters of A History of Humankind, 1 chapter hp, 1 chapter Alice in Wonderland, iffy but like 3 chapters 小王子, iffy but like 4 chapters of the Xiao Mao cat story - I should note that for Silent Reading, 小王子, Xiao Mao I only looked at the chinese mostly so more step 2, and for the others I did step 3 as recommended). Also I realize... I should probably count this with hours instead of chapters, because hours are where the original poster about LR mentioned when milestones are hit. However, being realistic, I do not do things in hour segments so I’m not sure any tracking will be as easy as this way...

A cool thing potentially about L R Method? I found some resources recently that will make this a lot easier (Bidiread is a site that can make parallel texts for you, which made silent reading MUCH easier since the audio doesn’t perfectly match so you NEED to see the chinese even if only doing step 3, to make sure you can keep track of where you are in the text when the audio skips paragraphs). I also found Francais Par Le Methode Nature as videos on youtube with audio and the text visible (is that not simply L R method step 2 but its all comprehensible, i love that book). And I found a few files on youtube of audiobooks with english audio and chinese/english parallel text on screen (a bit backwards in process but i’m curious to test it), one youtube channel who does chinese audio with parallel texts on screen (phenomenal!), and I remembered the site bilinguis exists which is excellent for French if you wanna try L R Method (it has a few french audios with the parallel texts). Also in the case of A History of Humankind - the audiobook for once is very closely synced to the actual chapter start/ends, so it was just easier to do L R Method with.

2. Listen to Chinese Spoonfed Audio, shadowing when I can

YES I did this! I was on 11 last month, now I’m on 15. (so 4 audio this month) Yes I realize that wasn’t a lot of improvement T-T. What can I say I am not very good at being disciplined. However I did learn something interesting this month ABOUT listening to these so I think I might do it more - I listened to some in the background while playing games, then later listened to them again (also why I only got through 4 - I was replaying audios maybe 2 times). And when I listened the second time I could understand nearly all, whereas obviously when playing my game I only caught parts of it. So I suppose what this showed me is partially listening and partially focusing still may have some benefit in helping to learn the info - and well obviously its easier to make time to play audio when u don’t need to focus 100% on it.

I also did some other misc listening to random stuff without any plan: 6? audio 1 of DeFrancis Beginner Chinese Reader, 1 audio of FSI Chinese, 2 condensed audios of Guardian (which was so cool?? also so cool i can follow along so well now??), 1 dracula chapter audio (don’t even ask i don’t know either), tian ya ke audio drama ep 1.

Chinese show episodes watched: 28 (You can see here is where my time went listening wise lol - Two Souls in One is GOOD u might wanna check it out, is all I’m saying, especially if the taiwan drama Bromance was ur thing, or the anime Ouran Host Club, or even Bureau of Transformer to a degree. I watched up to ep 25 and once its all aired to the finale I’m gonna finish it.

Optional going through my hanzi book: I burned out on this, but it was a good use of my time when I felt like writing. I only wrote/studied maybe 30 hanzi, and maybe 50 hanzi+radicals in my Radical-Specific hanzi book. If I continue, I think my goal will be to just continue the Radical-book to completion. Realistically, longer term, I need to go through the freaking Alan Hoenig’s Chinese Character’s book just to get the hanzi and their rough meaning to stick in my head (and learn the pronunciations through well context and vocab how I normally do). Right now I just learn through reading, but its an issue of sometimes I just end up associating one hanzi with the new word I learned but then as soon as I see it in a new word I don’t even remember having seen it before. If I paid a bit more attention to distinguishing I might notice when I’ve seen them before or they’re new, and have more starting info to relate to the character to attach the word info onto. (its a convoluted way of me saying if I have things to connect to each other I remember better even if it makes little sense to connect them - if I know car and pet, carpet’s easier to remember even though it has nothing to do with cars, cry in french ‘pleurer’ was easier to remember once my brain thought ‘plume of tears’ even though that makes no sense. i just remember things better than seeing pleurer and having no idea what to attach it to at all - even if i heard it means cry, if i don’t have a thing to associate it with i’ll forget easier. or melancholy - i had to associate it with melons, and cholly - reminds me of words for sickness so heavy-sick +sad is how i started finally remembering that word cause wow did i look it up over and over as a kid).

---

Japanese study plan from April:

1. continue through nukemarine’s memrise courses.

Okay I did do this!! Congrats! In March I had completed LLJ 3 - Kanji, 289/318 finished in LLJ 4 Tae Kim part 1. As of April, I have completed: LLJ 4 Part 1, LLJ 4 Part 2 51/365, LLJ 5 Core Vocabulary 420/1020. So yeah! Going quite well, in that I consistently did it - I realized for me the best time to do it is playing video games oddly enough, or watching youtube - just do it in between areas, or ep scenes/videos, as a short 5-10 minute break. Since I like taking breaks from things anyway. Like audio, its hard for me to find ways to get myself to do stuff like this (except worse cause I don’t vibe with flashcards).

My goal for May will probably be finish LLJ 4 Part 2, LLJ 5, and start LLJ 6? I can dream right...

Also, a cool note: I found audio-flashcard files that people made of the Japanese Core 2k vocabulary deck and sentences, with english-japanese audio. (If anyone wants a link just let me know). So now if I DO eventually get burned out on flashcards, I could switch to using those. They would work about as well as the Chinese Spoonfed Audio files I have (which work extremely well for me - audio flashcards I just listen to are so much more suited to how I study lol). However, I’d like to stick with Nukemarine’s decks as long as possible while I can focus - they cover grammar explicitly which helps me a lot, and the reading practice COMBINED with constant audio really helps me learn the readings of words. Which is something I need for japanese a LOT more than chinese.

2. continue reading Tae Kim’s grammar guide

Ahahahahaaa hahaaa... did not do it. Nope.

What I did do that was grammar related:

Watched Cure Dolly lessons 1-5 (and will probably watch more as I seem to click well with those explanations)

Read 24 pages of Japanese in 30 Hours while transcribing actual japanese into it (and will probably continue to read it, its so short I should just DO IT in a couple days, it also fulfilled my desire to write stuff)

JapaneseAudioLessons.com - read the wa vs ga explanation, reading the portable japanese grammar notes document right now (its 11 pages I’ll finish it today). I’ve said it before but i really LOVE this resource, and they have so much for free. I absolutely recommend if a beginner wants Pimsleur or Michael Thomas or some other paid resource etc, to just go to this site, download their full lesson grammar guide (its like 311 pages like a real textbook) and go through all their free audio lessons. You will cover a lot of ground (more than Pimsleur or Michael Thomas), and all for free. In addition, I’ve bought some of their kanji teaching books and they’re overall my favorite for remembering kanji specifically (yes more than Heisig’s RTK by far, and more than KKLC - although the Kodanshi book is a good reference to have around). I’m not kidding at all when I say just try this site’s free resources if you’re trying to use free stuff, its the closest I’ve found to an audio only teaching method, or an audio/textbook-like combo, that’s this much stuff and free. (For non free, I actually liked Genki if you do everything in it).

Other misc things done in japanese:

Watched Dracula the Musical in japanese with no subs. It was super hard, but also not so hard. It changed my life. 1000/10 would recommend watching it if you even remotely like dracula OR vampires - featuring a lesbian Dracula/Mina, and more importantly a story change about who kills Dracula, and Dracula and Mina’s agency and choice being the driving force of the ending. These story changes I LOVE and I now want them in more adaptations moving forward, its what I always craved of the ending of Dracula and never got - Dracula as a person (not monster), Mina as a person (not prey), and their choices influencing how the story ends and by whom (versus Van Helsing/the establishment symbol regaining control through annihilation of the ‘threat’ to that norm). Also it gave me a new interest in Japanese plays which is cool. I did not expect to love them this much! Also gave me a boost in japanese confidence, in that I no longer feel as “scared” to try immersing in japanese or in some kinds of content that seemed ‘harder’ - and that was a big hurdle I was too afraid to do, in the past when I studied.

Watched a few more lets plays (lets guess maybe 3-5 sections of 20 minutes?). Persona 2 innocent sin (cool to see me follow along despite not knowing the game), Final Fantasy IX (this one I saved, and could definitely pick up words from since I know some of the story and the lets player read everything - I should look up FFX), random stuff.

Tried to play some games in japanese! I’m going to go with this was about 3 hours. I tried crisis core’s opening to the first save point - it was playable (I can read most of the menus), and I can follow enough text to get the overall gist - however it was draining as so much is text only (I FORGOT how much reading is in this game). Great for reading practice I suppose. Also great in that it definitely reset my expectations about what is ‘doable’ for me - however I do think KH2 is probably still the easiest game i should start trying games with (since I have so many of the controls/menu memorized and can waste less time re-reading the tutorials), and since I know so many words by memory I’ll be able to focus more on grammar (whereas in CC I was glancing through kanji trying to keep up with the live action scenes). A bit too much reading for me to tackle again for a while, it was draining lol. Then I tried persona 3 for psp - first, i like the ps2/ps3 version better ToT. Second, also somehow I could read enough to survive - but the reading again took time, a lot isn’t voiced, and there are not frequent save points. So again I just played to the first save point. That one I may try again before CC though, because a lot more of the language is daily life stuff I could glance through and speed-read-guess lol, or could actually use if I learned it. Also occassionally p3 reads out loud which is nice. I suspect the Visual Novel I got will actually be best for practice (despite me not knowing the plot at all), because I’m guessing more of the lines will be voiced. All this reading would help me more if I could hear it voiced - and I may want to watch more Lets Plays, and Audiobooks on youtube, mainly for that fact: subtitles that i can read WITH audio so i can practice listening and reading together.

Tried reading a bit! First, some mangas I had (though I only read a page of each) - mainly it was just nice to see mangas are more accessible now. they’re about as readable to me rn as manhua were in chinese at 6-8 months in. I can just about follow the main gist, more if I use a dictionary for details. Also thanks to @yue-muffin telling me, learned I can look up words on iphone in the web browser just by highlighting words and clicking “look up.” Life changing. That in combination with me finding some japanese scripts of Final Fantasy games online (and I’ve always been curious what localizations changed), and this has been a little reading I found myself doing just because i felt like it. I didn’t read much - the equivalent of several dialogue boxes (the games i played made me read a LOT more lol). but I liked that i could see their kana when i looked them up, sound the sentences out to myself, contemplate them (so intensive read). Also if you have Speech tools enabled on your phone, you can swipe down with 2 fingers and it will read the page aloud - I used to do that a little with chinese on dual chinese-englist mtlnovel pages since it WILL read both, but Pleco reads chinese better so unless i’m only-listening i switched to pleco for that. But for these scripts it works great! (occasionally it will read all-kanji titles like chinese though lol - not once its into japanese sentences though). I thought it was really cool I could basically emulate what I do in Pleco for chinese, in a normal web browser for Japanese. (Also, for websites, Idiom app seems to work ok for reading Aloud as well - possibly better - but ios iphone “Look up” dictionaries are MUCH better than Idiom app’s).

In summary basically I surprisingly enjoyed reading and might keep trying to do it just because its interesting. However in general, first: I really want 2k words done in Nukemarine’s LLJ courses (LLJ 7 would put me at 1k common words, LLJ 12 would put me at 2k so...), and I’d really like a better grammar foundation (Cure Dolly, or japanese audio lessons grammar, Nukemarine LLJ also obviously fits that task with the grammar portions, really anything). While I want to play games, again I just really realize... how much easier my life will be with a better basis of knowledge first lol. Reading I can do in bite size if I want, but playing games is Draining in between saves right now lol. While i CAN do it right now, unless its a game i really can tune out with (like KH2 maybe) then its just too intensive right now for me to tolerate too much of.

Also, again, I think doing Nukemarine’s LLJ decks as breaks while playing games/watching stuff is working great, going to keep doing that. And listening to audio flashcard files while I have dead time (like level grinding). I have been listening to the Chinese Spoonfed audio, but other options could be: the english-japanese Core 2k audio files, the Japanese Audio Lessons files (which once years ago I’d listen to while excerising). For now I’ve focused on Chinese Spoonfed audio because I know I need to FINISH something before jumping to something else lol.

---

French stuff I did in April:

Listened to 6 chapters of Francais Par Le Methode Nature (and read some of them - oh i missed this book its my fave way to learn and it finally has audio!!)

listened to some bits of audiobooks (i don’t even know why, i don’t know - dracula, frankenstein, carmilla, sherlock)

read a little of Le Petit Prince (idk 3 chapters? browsing my book after finishing in chinese and... ok my heart is still a bit ;-; ... i’m gonna need to recover from this story...)

read a bit of dracula (again... idk why... also it was kind of a L R Method step 2 attempt in that I listened to audio too, but really I mainly just... read)

L R Method: 2 Chapters of Alice in Wonderland (step 2, because I have not tried step 3 yet).

What is funny as hell to me is both how many words I look up when I contemplate intensive reading (again life changed by the fact i can just highlight words and click “word lookup” on my phone). But also how I already... know I can thoroughly read without doing it. Like... yes I can look up a word I fuzzy-know to get clarification, but even my phone auto-gives me french-french dictionary first and sometimes only (is it because my google is in french), i’ve been used to french definitions only for years.. and also like... i know when i read a whole paragraph i get whatever words were fuzzy before? just read some of dracula again today and its fine. its fine. again informational texts are easier for me - but dracula being a lot of letters ‘describing what happened’ suits me quite easily (and somehow manages to be less annoying to me than the english version). like... alice in wonderland was probably the harder for all the quick adjectives/verbs used in just one or two paragraphs when i was still re-remembering vocabulary i used to know lol. Like... in a dream world i’d love to test L R Method and see HOW MUCH it can teach a person. But like... while french would be the easiest to test it with? I kind of realize i’m also at a point in french where i have more benefit just continuing to read in french and listen in french (to fix my poor listening skills). referencing the english is not really... particularly necessary, it just usually slows me down. while i’m missing a LOT of words for fluent speaking/grammatically ok speaking - i don’t think listening reading method would really help me with that, since reading sure hasn’t. if any readng material might it’s francais par le methode nature just because it drills simple correct grammar construction, and reinforces it, and teaches grammar through context. but all my other reading materials... are more comprehension...

Anyway in SUMMARY wow i did a lot more than i expected this month!

---

Next months goals!

Chinese May Goals:

***Read anything. Great plan, has been working great. Ideally I would like to: finish Xiao Mao book one, and then either continue another Xiao Mao novel or start one of the other stories rated 2+ ease. I am considering 许三观��血记 because its about as easy as the little prince, I’ve read an excerpt and its historical fiction so generally practical. Or 流星·蝴蝶·剑 by Gu Long if I want to work on a base in wuxia words from an easier novel. Or 他们的故事 by 一根黄瓜丝儿 if I’m ready to return to it - although this one is longer (the other stories being more like 12-20 chapters) so I’d prefer to save this for later. For any of these - look words up as desired since I’ll read them in Pleco. Ideally as my ‘harder’ reading I would like to either continue hanshe (intensive reading), or continue guardian (extensive reading) - so its a matter of if I want to look words up.

***Continue listening to Chinese Spoonfed Audio (please can i Finish it please ;-;)

Optional: experiment with Listening Reading Method. With the finding of those videos on youtube, I’d like to make my life literally as easy and streamlined as possible and literally just TEST L R Method by doing it with a few of the videos I found. It literally cannot get easier than premade videos with audio.

Other optional: listen to misc audio (I would love the time to watch the tian ya ke audiodrama WITH its subtitles then listen without again), watch shows, read Alan Hoenig’s Chinese Characters (i doubt this will happen), do some of my Radical-hanzi book.

Japanese May Goals:

***Continue: Nukemarine’s LLJ courses - ideally finish LLJ 4 Part 2, LLJ 5, and start LLJ 6. (this truly can be basically my only study method if I can’t do more). THIS IS THE PRIORITY. The quicker I get ALL of this done, the more of a foundation I will have to do Anything else.

Hopefully: Continue some kind of grammar explanation beyond Nukemarine’s stuff - either Tae Kim (unlikely but i was at chapter 10 before), Cure Dolly (i’m on 6), Japanese Audio Lessons Grammar, Japanese in 30 Hours while writing japanese in (I’m on page 24). Again this is a higher priority as it will make anything else easier.

Optional: Reading in any form - so video game time, lets plays, audiobook youtube with captions, actual reading as desired (like scripts). Including this because I know I will eventually try again lol.

Optional: listening in any form - so another musical! maybe listen to japanese audio lessons, or the core 2k audio, or a lets play, etc. I find I’m probably less likely to listen to something but it might happen!

French May Goals*:

*aka if I feel like doing it because french has no real goals at the moment! -3-)/

***Continue watching Le Francais Par Le Methode Nature videos. (There’s only 33, they’re like 10 minutes long or less, its about basics, PLEASE). I remember this book took forever to read 1/3 of when i was an upper beginner, well now surely its less slow going? especially because read aloud its as fast as the speakers voice! so it is not time consuming and i’ve wanted to finish this book forever! i could at least finish it up to where the audio files match to!

Read???? Read??? Honestly I’ve just been wanting to read Dracula and Carmilla in French its a vibe I’ve been in. Its not high priority or anything but hey it might happen. If it does happen, ideally I’d like to listen to an audiobook too around the same time (maybe after, or have the page read, idk). Just because while reading refreshes my vocab, what I really want to build up is listening/pronunciation. To get to a point where I can listen and shadow would be nice.

Tied to above, try L R Method? Not a high priority, though it would be super easy to test! Just because I already started testing it with Alice in Wonderland... but that basically amounts to just reading practice with audio again, for me.

I found Merlin in french so THAT is a thing.

Honestly the only thing I really want to do ‘study’ wise in french is finish that freaking book, especially now that I can listen to audio with it. It’s a nice foundation and I’d really like a refresher/fill in any big gaps in my learning. Anything else about french written here is mostly a reminder to myself to LISTEN to audio when possible, and try and improve that skill a bit if I go and read.

---

Real fast CORE SUMMARY:

Chinese: READ easier stories rated 2+ and keep getting through some, in combination with reading the harder hanshe and Guardian. Also listen to Chinese Spoonfed audio whenever u remember! Attempt some L-R method with the youtube videos you found. Immerse as desired.

Japanese: continue Nukemarine LLJ courses. Also do some grammar study somewhere, and immerse as desired.

French: listen/listen-read to Francais Par Le Methode Nature. Also read/listen as desired - ideally combining the activities.

*in all cases, where possible, combine listening-reading or try to practice both skills. (So reading in Pleco - play audio afterward to practice, play Guardian condensed audio in down time, with audiodramas follow subs when possible, when immersing with anything try L-R like strategies to add practice with both skills).

#rant #april progress #april goals #may study plan #study plan #may goals #may #what i learned from this is... i have no fucking structure guys #im a mess i just do Whatever #only thing close to ANY structure is that with chinese im fairly consistent about reading #someone help me come up with a cleaner study plan?#or is the fact just that this is Just how i study???#do i just need to bounce and do random stuff?

2 notes · View notes

grand-theft-grotto · 4 years

Text

Jonathan S. (some similarities between Sims and Strange; a far more comprehensive list than anyone needed)

Reposted for spoiler warnings

- The names. Ofc, the names. Come on

- Academics who want to Get At the Forbidden Knowledge

- Soft voice, a little posh1

- Prematurely greying hair2

- Pre-canon experience with addiction

- Both find out, without knowing wtf they're doing, that they have magical powers and a place/destiny3 in a world far larger than themselves

- Magic POWERS

- studies with a ball of red string on hand, probably

- Dry Humor

- A Bit Dramatic

- Their curiosity keeps causing terrible things to happen

PLOT

- - - magic tunnels and roads from centuries ago, exploring at possible risk to self without really knowing what's in there

- Best friends w/ a cat-loving lady

- Although they continue to grow in power, their bastard rat mentor (who is also an academic and has similar powers but many more years in the game) keeps them in the dark, guides their studies away from or towards certain truths, and frames them for murder

- Has to save their S/O from a Manipulative Bastard who is also magic

- - - S/O is gentle and supportive of Jonathan; was raised by religious parents/a religious parent, is intelligent, patient+strong, and, when they need to be, uncompromising. They’re not thought to be of exceptional beauty4, but everything about them more than makes up for it. When needed, they stop Jonathan from being too stupid and self-destructive.

- - - Manipulative Magic Bastard has S/O under a spell where they forget who they are

- - - One or the other of them has to spend months thinking the other is dead when they’re really not and they never quite recover

(v v spoilers for mag160 and jsamn ~chapter 44, ep #5 v v)

- - - Jonathan and S/O either have or will almost certainly end up having a tragic end as a couple

- - - The stolen S/O can only be brought back when Jonathan goes into the Other Realm where Manipulative Bastard reigns. When he finally finds his love there, he has to make them remember who they are and who he is; "Jonathan? JONATHAN?"

- - - After Jonathan leads the S/O out of the Other Realm, something unfathomably worse happens very quickly (magical and using him as the conduit); said thing leaves him Marked5

- When he finally tries to leave the drama behind and live with his S/O in the peaceful countryside, he's called back into duty, leaving him racked with guilt about what he does there6

- survivor's guilt and self-destructive tendencies

(v spoilers end v)

- coded for ADHD (especially in regards to getting sucked into his work; studies obsessively)

- coded for PTSD as time goes on

- There’s a dude who hoards books with whom they have a begrudging “you’re a bit terrible but you have all the books” relationship

- There’s at least one dude who IS a book

- Starts to use his newfound power for questionable purposes, obstensibly for self-preservation; he crosses some moral lines

- Falls back into addiction in some form or another

- Lotsa guilt! He's made some decisions he can't undo and starts to wonder whether it was really self-preservation which made him do it; he wanted information from someone, so he took away their ability to rest, and he can't give that back again

- Makes sometimes rash decisions, especially when trying to help his loved ones or experimenting with something new

- becomes disillusioned with the Magic Establishment and his rat man bastard mentor

(v v spoilers for mag160 v v)

- - - (Rat Man Bastard Mentor and Manipulative Bastard were colleagues, which Jonathan finds out, outraging him. When Jon was in his most vulnerable state, Mentor Bastard withheld his help, serving his own agenda. He is beyond disillusioned at this point and just wants to Go Home, but he can’t)

(v spoilers end v)

- except for wanting to know more, he Never Asked For Any of This

1 though Jonathan Sims drops the posh accent as time goes on

2 "'Reddish-brown is such a fickle colour - there is no wear in it - I am quite certain I saw some grey in it. And yet he cannot be more than - what? - thirty? thirty-two perhaps? p.228'"

"No-one ever believes me when I tell them my age. I don’t know if it’s the already greying hair or something in my demeanour, but they always act surprised when I mention being a child in the Nineties. I will admit the last few years have aged me considerably. MAG81"

3 said destiny was prophesized or planned centuries in advance; "'Their work!' scoffed Vinculus. 'Theirs? Do you still not understand? They are the spell John Uskglass is doing. That is all they have ever been. And he is doing it now! p. 758'"

4. The only evidence for this in terms of Martin is the tone with which he says "I'm not exactly the smallest guy in the world, I know" in MAG22 and Basira assigning Tim as "the hot one" in the office; these comments don't prove Martin's beauty one way or another but imply how he's used to his appearance being treated at this point

5,6 details differ slightly between the book and the miniseries

5 refers to the Black Tower and 6 refers to the 1815 resumption of the Napoleonic Wars and Waterloo. In The Magnus Archives, both refer to the events of MAG159 and 160

I may come back to and edit this post with additional notes

#themagnusarchives #magnuspod #thearchivist #js&mn #jonathan strange #jonathan sims #multifandom #jonathan strange & mr norrell #tma #dark academia #grotto voce

10 notes · View notes

curiosity-killed · 4 years

Text

a bow for the bad decisions

canon-divergent AU from ep. 24 (on ao3)

“Shut up,” he hisses, wet. “Shut up.” Wei Wuxian falls silent and somehow that’s worse. His brother is silent, tears slipping down his cheeks, and it is worse than anything he could say aloud. “A-Cheng? Xianxian?” Swallowing, he unclenches his fingers from around Wei Wuxian’s collar and sinks back onto his heels. Released, Wei Wuxian sways and stutters back down, his eyes downcast. “What’s wrong?” a-jie asks, worry thrumming through her voice. Wei Wuxian bows his head still, leaving this confession for Jiang Cheng. Anger echoes through Jiang Cheng’s chest at the way he presents himself as if waiting for punishment. It’s what he deserves; it hurts that he thinks it’s coming.

He hesitates for a moment. As much as he scolded Wei Wuxian for the same thing, he doesn’t want to worry jiejie more than necessary. If she knows Wei Wuxian’s core is gone, she’ll not only have all that backed up worry from the war but also fresh worry every time he wanders off without one of them. She fusses over the both of them enough as is; she shouldn’t strain herself so much for them.

On the other hand, there’s no one able to persuade Wei Wuxian like a-jie. And — and he’s not sure he can keep it a secret from her. He didn’t know Wei Wuxian could; Jiang Cheng is used to being in on his pranks and lies, not kept out by them. He swallows. “Wei Wuxian’s core is gone,” he says. Distantly, he’s a little proud how steadily he says it. His voice comes out a little inflectionless, but it doesn’t shake or, gods forbid, break in a sob. Wei Wuxian’s head dips lower. His hands still hang at his sides, shoulders curved forward. He hears the hitch in jiejie’s breath, the quiet gasp, before he forces himself to look up. One hand covers her lips, the other pressed to her stomach, and she stares wide-eyed at Wei Wuxian. “A-Xian,” she breathes out. He swallows, draws his hands over his knees so that they’re both tight around the stupid flute. Jiang Cheng’s teeth grit, jaw clenching in useless anger. What right does he have to look so browbeaten, so defeated? He’s kept up this lie for years — so successfully that the whole cultivation world has no idea. Of course he would. Even mediocre, even without the golden core that impressed everyone up to Lan Qiren himself, he can bend the world to his wishes. What is impossible for Wei Wuxian? “Wei Wuxian, don’t you have anything to say?” he snaps. His throat bobs as he swallows before he shifts, straightening up on his knees so that he’s facing both of them equally. Folding his hands before him, he stretches them out and bows his forehead flat to the floor. “I am sorry, shijie, Jiang Cheng,” he says quietly. Horror shoots through Jiang Cheng’s chest at the sight. This isn’t— he didn’t— This isn’t what he wanted. “A-Xian,” a-jie says over the rustle of her skirts as she crosses the room and tugs up on his elbows. “A-Xian, stop that. You don’t need to — to apologize like that.” He rises only reluctantly and keeps his gaze down. “I can’t fulfill my duties as Head Disciple of Yunmeng Jiang,” he says, evenly like he’s reciting facts. “I am no longer fit for the title or — or position. I can leave.” “Shut up,” Jiang Cheng snaps. “Shut up. You’re not going anywhere. What the hell are you thinking? You’re our brother. Did I stop being your brother when Wen Zhulio got me?” His eyes flick to Jiang Cheng, something almost fearful in the way they dart sideways to him. He hates that as much as he hates this awful, complacent self-sacrifice. “A-Cheng’s right, Wuxian,” jiejie says. She reaches out for his wrist, giving it a squeeze. “You’re our brother no matter what. You shouldn’t have kept this from us but now that we know, we can figure it out together. We can help you.” For all that she’s never been very strong at cultivation, Jiang Cheng privately thinks a-jie knows a whole different form of magic with her words and voice. She could calm a typhoon with only the right words. Now, Wei Wuxian doesn’t look wholly convinced, but he gives a trembling nod. It’s something, at least. It’s not like Jiang Cheng knows how they’re going to fix this, either, what help they can give. A-jie’s right: they’ll figure it out together. “It’s late,” a-jie says. “Why don’t we all go to bed and we’ll figure things out in the morning?” It feels like they’re little kids again, caught throwing tantrums because they missed a nap. Still, they both rise and let a-jie guide them out of the hall, one on either side of her like overgrown guard dogs. They escort her to her rooms first, like good brothers, and she pauses at the door to reach up and cradle Wei Wuxian’s damp cheek. “A-Xian,” she says softly, “we’ll get through this. No matter what, we three will solve it together. Alright?” He gives an obedient nod, and she smiles, smoothing back his hair absently. She looks over to include Jiang Cheng in her smile and reaches out to squeeze his wrist once. He summons up an answering smile and gives her a nod. He feels heartened somehow, impossibly, by her steady calm. After saying their goodnights, he and Wei Wuxian turn back to walk to their own rooms. “In the morning, Healer Xiong should look you over,” he says a few steps in. “See if your demonic cultivation has affected your meridians or if there’s anything she can do.” He remembers, still, the burning hollow after. How it felt like emptiness was a physical thing chewing away at the stem of his heart, the fine thread of his veins. He thinks of Wen Qing, her brusque manners and stubborn care. He brushes the thought away. It’s not like she could fix his core in the end anyway. “Ai, no, there’s no need for that,” Wei Wuxian says. “I’m fine, really. There’s no sense troubling Healer Xiong, and anyway, who knows my body better than me? I can tell you my meridians are fine.” The deflection is too similar to what he said back when they first found him over Wen Chao’s wailing form. It’s said more lightly this time, but it still echoes that same words he used against Lan Wangji, and Jiang Cheng shoots him a sharp look. “Don’t be stupid,” he says. “If you actually want any chance of figuring this out, we need the best help we can get. It’s not like Healer Xiong will tell anyone anyway. She’s been with us since a-jie was born.” Wei Wuxian grimaces slightly, looking away. He worries at his bottom lip for a second, as if chewing on his words, and Jiang Cheng frowns, waiting. At last he sighs. “It’s just — I uh I used resentful energy to heal some injuries,” he admits. “Nothing bad! Just — you know Healer Xiong will see that and then give me that sad look she has like I just ran over all her herbs—” “She didn’t even yell at you when you ruined her herbs, you baby.” “—and you know how awful that look is,” Wei Wuxian continues. “It’s like she’s sad she’s somehow failed you and then you just feel terrible. It’s the worst.” Glaring at him, Jiang Cheng crosses his arms. It’s true that Xiong Chunfeng has perfected the art of looking disappointed to the point that he thinks she might have been able to stop the war if they only got her in front of Wen Ruohan at the start. Her whole face goes soft and sad, dark eyes searching like she’s trying to understand how she could have done better in order to prevent their mistakes. Just thinking about it makes his skin itch with old shame. “Fine,” he relents, dropping his arms. “But as soon as it’s cleared up, you go see her.” “Of course. Right away,” Wei Wuxian agrees readily. They continue a few steps in silence, Jiang Cheng casting searching looks out of the corner of his eye. He doesn’t remember Wei Wuxian getting hurt recently. In the war, they weren’t often fighting too close to each other, but Wei Wuxian always had his corpses and ghouls and spirits spiraling out from him like the branches of a hurricane. He frowns. “How bad?” he asks. “Eh? Oh.” Wei Wuxian’s smile falters a moment, just a flicker, before he grins and waves it off. “It’s nothing. Stop worrying, Jiang Cheng, your face is going to stick like that and then who’ll ever marry you?” Jiang Cheng jerks away as Wei Wuxian loops his arm around his shoulders, cheeks heating red. He’s a sect leader, fought in a war — he shouldn’t still be flustered by something so stupid, but he can’t help the flush that burns his ears. “Shut up. I wouldn’t have to worry if you weren’t such an idiot,” he mutters. When he elbows Wei Wuxian this time, it’s gentle, barely a nudge. Wei Wuxian is silent a moment before his arm slips off Jiang Cheng’s back. He misses the familiar warmth immediately. “Jiang Cheng, don’t do that,” he says quietly.

“Do what?” Jiang Cheng snaps back. He can already feel the shame creeping up as quickly as his brief embarrassment. All their lives they’ve roughhoused and shoved each other recklessly, using their strength because they knew each other could match it. They hadn’t during the war, but Wei Wuxian had been cold and closed off, and the distance had felt wrong. It had felt like he didn’t remember how to hug the one time Jiang Cheng had embraced him, before he was scared off by Wei Wuxian’s sharp new edges. Now — now he isn’t sure how to close that distance without hurting his brother. When they were younger, he could shove Wei Wuxian because he knew he was strong enough to shove back harder. Without his core, though, he’s missing that power. It’s what started all this in the first place. “Acting like I’m going to fall apart at any second,” Wei Wuxian says. “I meant what I said. I’m not fragile or — or broken. You don’t have to act any differently. We could just — forget all this. Go back to normal.” He doesn’t sound particularly hopeful, and Jiang Cheng swallows. They can’t go back, no matter what either of them say. They can’t go back to any of it — to before Lotus Pier burned, before his parents died, before the war and Wei Wuxian’s ghostly path. Even if he never found out about Wei Wuxian’s core, they can never go back to the way it was.

#mdzs #the untamed #untamed fic #cql #yunmeng siblings #my writing #the thesis of this story: Siblings are Complicated and sometimes wanting to help does not make you actually good at or capable of helping

12 notes · View notes

kolbisneat · 4 years

Text

MONTHLY MEDIA: November 2019

Whoa November is over! So I didn’t see any movies this month but there are so many I want to check out. Parasite! Knives Out! Jojo Rabbit! Maybe December.

……….TELEVISION……….

Daybreak (Episode 1.01 to 1.03) This seems like fun so far! Characters are great, the world seems well-established and feels like it’s been lived in for a while, and it’s really just the plot that I’m not clicking with. Most of the stuff works until it goes back to “gotta find dream girl!” It just feels...dull. Especially when compared to all the other far more interesting stuff going on. Gonna keep watching but hot dang I hope they move on from the “where’s Sam?” stuff soon.

The Good Place (Episode 4.01 to 4.05) I’m not ready for this series to end but hot dang does it feel like it knows where it’s going and how it’s going to get there. I’m just happy to be along for the ride.

Queer Eye: We’re In Japan! (Episode 1.01 to 1.04) I appreciate that they addressed the magic of translators at the end of the first ep and I wish they would’ve gone into more of it. Their “guide” was likely a choice based on social media influence and bilingualism, but it seemed like a missed opportunity to have a gay Japanese man introduce the Fab 5 to the culture. Even the comedian from Episode 3 seemed like a better fit. I just don’t know if I got the right introduction into various nuances of the culture, you know? Also this article says a lot more and in a much clearer way.

……….READING……….

Emperor Mollusk Versus the Sinister Brain by A. Lee Martinez (Page 191 of 293) Very breezy and easy read but for an interplanetary romp with a hyper-smart squid as the protagonist, it isn’t quite connecting. The book is full of alien tropes and the premise is fun, but the lead character doesn’t really get challenged and there’s little impact from events as they happen. It feels pulpy but doesn’t seem to have the melodrama that makes it read like the author couldn’t commit to the bit.

A Spell for Chameleon by Piers Anthony (Complete) I have a vivid memory of seeing this cover when I was a child and really wanting to read it. So when I saw it at a thrift store I immediately picked it up. There were some fun magical ideas in here but it is dripping with so much 70s sexism that I can’t, in good faith, recommend this to anyone. If it was maybe one or two moments then you could maybe give some leniency to the era, but every chapter has at least one moment where the author takes a shot at women. It’s real bad.

Silver Surfer Omnibus by Dan Slott, Michael Allred, Laura Allred, and many many more (9 issues/chapters in...sorry this book doesn’t really have page numbers) Okay I love it. I didn’t know what to expect but you know when you just have a gut feeling that you’ll like something? Exactly this. I knew nothing about Silver Surfer but the book catches you up and then takes you on a fun series of intergalactic adventures. When I realized it was essentially Marvel Doctor Who, I knew this was for me. I’m really taking my time with this cause I think it’s something special.

James Bond Origin by Jeff Parker, Bob Q, Roman Stevens, Jordan Boyd, Jordie Bellaire, and Simon Bowland (Complete) Pinpointing what makes a Bond story a “Bond” story is tricky. This series is a fun and engaging spy narrative, but I think showing the early days of Bond makes it read the same way Young Indiana jones felt: you know where they’re going but they’re not quite there yet. That isn’t to say it’s not great, cause it is. I suppose I’d just recommend this to those who like spy stories, narratives set during the second world war, or a combination of the two. Those are likely the same people as those who like James Bond as a character, but I think it lends itself more to the genre than the character. Great start to the series.

Delicious in Dungeon: Volume 6 by Ryoko Kui (Complete) Still fantastic. It took a weird turn in the middle and I was worried it was moving away from the characters to focus on big fantastical monsters and melodrama, but it quickly corrected course. I can’t not recommend this to anyone who likes small fantasy with a gimmick.

The Tomb of Black Sand by Jacob Hurst, Gabriel Hernandez, and more! (Complete) This was mostly for research and I love this D&D module. It’s a fun concept with nuance and one of my favourite fundamental details: the characters are doing their own thing with their own goals and have been doing things before the party shows up. If you’re okay with spoilers, check out this review.

The Wolves in the Walls by Neil Gaiman and Dave McKean (Complete) It’s interesting reading a true picture book by Neil Gaiman. I enjoy it as an adult, but I wonder if it connects well with its target audience. With that said, I loved the craftsmanship of the story and seeing Gaiman’s work stripped down to its essentials really helps to understand his approach to writing.

……….AUDIO……….

The Adventure Zone: Graduation (Podcast) Back to D&D and having Travis DM is a great change up! With that said, I’m having a hard time getting past the first ep. It introduces so many characters and so much world-building that I’m not really getting into it.

……….GAMING……….

Untitled Goose Game (House House) Fantastic, silly fun. I love the concept and the execution is perfect. I wish the game was maybe...2 levels longer, but what we do have is fantastic. Highly recommend.

Maze of the Blue Medusa (Satyr Press) The group just sorted out a major threat that has been following them throughout the dungeon. A peek behind the curtain: I’m not sure this module is connecting with the group. I don’t think there’s a clear goal and the party hasn’t really taken the initiative to make their own goals. Maybe that’s my fault and I think part of it has to do with our previous adventure being fairly bespoke and rather on rails. They loved it, but I also think it set a precedent. I need to pull back and chat with the players to see how they’re feeling.

A Red & Pleasant Land (Lamentations of the Flame Princess) We don’t get to play often but when we do, it’s a great time. The party stumbled into a genuine warzone and had their first taste of real danger. But they also landed their first true kill and it really had a lot of impact! Up until now, enemies have been whimsically changing when they “die” so to kill someone really meant something. It was a moment that really stuck with me.

And that’s it! As always, Let me know if you have anything you think I should check out and happy Saturday.

#Monthly Media #Rambles #Kolbisneat #Andrew Kolb

28 notes · View notes