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meepmoopfanfics · 3 years

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you don’t get a win unless you’re playing the game: Daveed Diggs x Reader Chapter 6 Part 2

The familiar sound of Alexander Hamilton blares through your phone speakers waking you from your deep, restful sleep. You reach over to snooze it but are almost too excited to continue rehearsals to even close your eyes again. It’s 7:30am. Monday. It’s finally here. The day you would rehearse for your dream show in front of your dream cast. The sunlight peeks through your window, shining warm, bright light on your cheeks, filling your soul with positive energy for the day. You reach over to your nightstand to flip through your script to make sure you’re able to nail all of the alto harmonies in front of the whole cast today.

You had your rehearsal outfit laid out from the night before. You weren’t one to be this organized or prepared... but for Hamilton?! You were instantly on top of your shit. You pulled on your favorite black Lululemon leggings, a camo sports bra (you’re ready for battle here!), and a cute cropped burgundy shirt from Urban Outfitters. You threw on a white Nike hoodie over top to keep you warm when you weren’t dancing. You giggled at the thought of potentially wearing your copy of Daveed’s signature Purple Oaklandish hoodie to rehearsal that you got as a gag gift from your parents on your last birthday. One day that would have to happen. Would be fangirling at its finest. Maybe you would eventually just burn it so no one saw.

Your subway ride to the Richard Rogers was not as chaotic as usual. The trains were on time and you felt like the universe was finally on your side. You stopped into the coffee shop across the street to grab a large black coffee and a classic bacon, egg, and cheese on an English muffin with avocado to get you going. You were there a little early so you could foam roll and stretch while listening to chill music. You always needed your “me” time to get into your groove before facing the day. You walked into your dressing room and were so happy to see Michelle already there, devouring her favorite Panera bagel, the cinnamon crunch. Mid-bite, she squeals at seeing you.

“Y/N!!! You have me on the edge of my freakin seat here. What in the HELL happened after brunch?”

You giggled and felt the heat come over your face.

“Let me tell you Michelle... it was everything.”

“Was it good?!” Michelle immediately blurted out.

“...yeeeeeeeah...” You said through a smirk.

“WAS HE BIG?!” Michelle yelled.

“SHHHHH” You said to shut her up while snickering.

You both laughed so hard you felt tears coming to your eyes. Thankfully there was no one else in the dressing rooms near you yet so you weren’t that worried.

Until two seconds later when you heard a knock from wall next to you.

Michelle and you screamed and continued to die laughing.

“Laaaaaadieeees!! What’s goin oooon?” Anthony bursts into your dressing room without warning. “What are ya laughin’ about?”

“Nothing, it’s nothing!” You said quickly back, continuing the laughter.

“Oh yeah?! Nothin at all to do with Diggs, right?” Anthony’s signature grin came across his face as his face turned red as he held back laughter. He nudged your arm a couple of times. “I heard the whole thing, Y/N, the walls are paper thin. But it’s chill! It’s chill!” He waved his hands signaling that he would keep a secret and would have your back. Then out of no where he whisper taunts “Diggs is after the bullet! Diggs is after the buuuulleeeeet!!!”

Thankfully Anthony’s actual dressing room was upstairs next to Diggs. Ant was only visiting the PT room to warm up.

“You’re the absolute worst!” You responded.

“Enjoy your breakfast ladies!” Anthony waved goodbye in the silliest way and headed back out.

You and Michelle caught up over your breakfast sandwiches. You showed her the note you wrote on your phone about your hookup, trying not to miss out on any details when telling her. Your attentiveness to details and your photographic memory were so helpful when it came to choreography, but when it came to remembering events, it was both a blessing and a curse. Re-reading it, however, was having you break a sweat more than if you started warming up.

Michelle then filled you in on her evening with Cedric. You knew the two of them were bound to become a thing even though she was hesitant about it. And thankfully you wouldn’t have to worry about Cedric coming on to you in any way.

Time passed and both you and Michelle warmed up together, foam rolled, and got ready to go. You started to get butterflies thinking about dancing for Lin Manuel Miranda. He was having his alternate, Javier, stand in for rehearsals so he could watch from the theater. He was going to see your every move of Act 1. You were proud of yourself for how well you knew the show and felt perfectly comfortable with your castmates.

“Alright good morning everyone!” You heard from the loud speaker that reached all rooms backstage. “You all can make your way to the stage for our first run through of Act 1! Make sure you grab your mic belts and mics from sound. Thank you! Everyone to stage, please, everyone to stage.”

“I can’t believe this is happening.” You said aloud.

You made your way to the stage. Even though you already had seen the set and the majestic view of the theater seats in the Richard Rogers, it still gave you chills every time. The intricate detailing in the set design was something you could stare at for hours and continue to find something new.

You walked out of your comfort zone to stand next to Anthony who was giving Jasmine a shoulder massage. They were so sweet and truly the epitome of what love/healthy relationships should be and look like.

You looked around at everyone chatting to each other in awe. There was Oak making Michelle and Cedric laugh as if they’d been best friends for years, Renee and Philippa giggling and rubbing each others arms to stay warm, and Leslie pacing already in his craft, perfecting every last detail to ensure he still had that Tony winning performance in him.

Stephanie was seated a few rows back to get a good view of the full stage and balcony. Andy, the choreographer, wasn’t there this week since he was working on some other projects, but he would be coming to watch soon. You couldn’t wait to dance for Andy again, your dream choreographer. She sat next to Alex Lacamoire with the “god mic” which she would be shouting out notes and corrections from during the run.

“Check check...” Stephanie said in a low, radio-esque voice. “It’s me, God.”

The entire cast and crew erupted in laughter.

“Just jooooking it's Steph. WHAT’S UP WOLF PAAACKKK?!”

The OBC woo’d, shouted, and clapped.

Then you heard a familiar raspy voice shout, just about an inside voice, “It’s too early SK.”

You looked over to see Daveed looking hella hot with his hair pulled up a-la Lafayette style with his glasses on, scratching the scruff of his freshly trimmed beard.

“It’s too early for shots out the grammy hangovers, Diggs.” Stephanie responded playfully. You hoped one day you’d get to take one out of the grammy.

Daveed looked tired, but so sexy as expected. He was dessed in a Black Oaklandish tank and red sweats, with a black hoodie tied around his waist. You instantly you got a sour feeling in your stomach. You imagined him partying out late with other women, hooking up with them after he threw back a few Belvedere shots with Rafa... wait. Your mind was making up situations that were not even real. Shit... I guess you were starting to like this idiot. You rolled your eyes at yourself and focused back on his bulging biceps to snap out of it.

Gotta pay attention, gotta pay attention. You thought.

“I can guess who he was out late with!!” Anthony softly whispered in your ear. Jasmine instantly hit him on the shoulder giving him a dirty, yet playful look.

“Oh shut it, A.” You whispered back as you elbowed him in the side.

Daveed looked over at you and Ant but had no idea what you both said. His eyes then met yours, sending a heartbeat to your core. He winked at you quickly and smirked. You winked back.

“I see you, Y/N...” Jazzy whispered. “You guys are acting like Ant and I did when we started this shindig.”

“It’s nothing, really.” You said while breaking eye contact, trying to sound chill.

“Y/N... don’t you dare lie to me!” She giggled. You were dumbfounded by her perfectly clear skin.

“Well, we’re just two super flirty people, it’s nothing, well, nothing more than that on his end I don’t think.”

“Girl just be patient. Enjoy it. He really isn’t openly flirty with many people. He sees what he likes and takes it. You’ll see. If anyone knows that, we do.” Jazzy mentioned while pointing at her and A. She then started softly warming up her vocal chords and gave you a pat on your shoulder. She was so sweet and the positive, chill energy she brought into the room was contagious.

“Lets take it from the top y'all!” Stephanie shouted on her mic.

You headed backstage to get ready for opening. You and Daveed started backstage Left together. You approached him and he gently placed his warm hand on your lower back as you passed him.

��Morning, (Y/Nickname). Merde, babygirl.” He said as you walked to your wing.

“Mornin, Lafayette.” You said as you snickered. “Loving the hair.”

He smiled and shook his little poofball on top of his head back at you as you both settled into your spots.

The piano keys pounded the same melody as you heard from your alarm waking up this morning. An unreal moment for you. After Leslie sung his solo, one by one the principals started rapping the words to Alexander Hamilton. It was hard not to mouth them under your breath. It went perfectly. Aaron Burr, Sir went through quickly since you weren’t on stage really. You didn’t get a single note during My Shot. The little moments you had together bantering with Daveed were cute and he “shoved you with love” as the chorus says during rehearsals if you know someone’s in the wrong spot. One after one, you all nailed your dances. You and Cedric nailed your partnering with only one slight mishap with the basket toss lifts in Helpless, since it was your first time using the rehearsal skirts. They were heavy as hell.

Then came time for Stay Alive. Your first moment as the Bullet in front of Lin. You counted and perfectly grabbed the bullet from M4′s rifle causing Stephanie to come on the mic and say “You better work, Y/N!” You smiled as you mimicked the bullet just surpassing Javier’s skull. You respected Javier so much because he took his work so seriously. That’s how you wanted to be known. The quick change into the British army coat was going to be difficult, but you know the dressers backstage were on top of it a and would make sure you’d get to stage on time once the show premiered.

The rest of the run through was a sheer blur of running back stage through the wings, mimicking where your quick changes would be, staring at awe at Daveed as he rapped 19 words in 3 seconds, even while completely hungover, and chugging water bottle after water bottle. This was tough stuff. Non stop was a cardio routine essentially, and pushing Chris as Washington on the moving stairs was way tougher that you thought. You didn’t want to hurt the set so you were extra gentle with it. The way Stephanie responded to the cast was so positive. You all were knockouts. She gave some notes to Michelle about her mother lift, which she corrected and perfected immediately. You were so thankful to be part of such a talented and intelligent cast who were quick on their feet and no nonsense.

“If that were in costume, that would’ve been a near perfect first run for your cast.” Stephanie said.

“EXCEPT I WASN’T IN IT.” Lin said as he snatched the mic. The cast giggled as they plopped onto the stage floor, panting from the run. “My new cinnamon rolls are perfect. PERFECT I tell you. I can feel all of your energy beaming from the stage. I can’t wait to perform with you all. This is truly an honor.”

Everyone clapped together. Just so happy to be performing after such a long time apart. You’ve never felt more proud.

“Now OBC’s... make sure we don’t let our comfortability tinge our performance okay? Remember when the material was fresh and fun? We need to make it fresh and fun for our audiences. Jazz watch the eye contact with Ant, you’re gonna ruin it for the LAM fans if John Laurens looks like he's straight.” Everyone laughed. “Also Daveed, quit milking your side moments with Y/N.”

“I noticed that too...” Steph chimed in in a tone which sounded like she had discovered a secret.

You began to feel embarrassed and covered your face with your hands.

“I was shoving with love!” Daveed shouted, trying to make the situation less awkward. He didn’t look back at you, no recognition, no nothing. Your stomach started to churn with nerves again. Could he not admit he was flirting with you? I guess it was a professional setting, but still sort of upsetting.

“Alright let’s take a twenty minute break. New ensemble, we’ll go a little more in depth with minuscule notes and changes. Wolfpack, take a half hour before music brushup with Alex.” Steph turned off the mic and people dispersed into their dressing rooms, the green rooms, or into the audience to grab snacks/ foam roll.

Your Burgundy top was slightly sweat drenched from the hard work you put in. You got back up to your dressing room with Michelle and saw your phone light up with a text.

Diggs: You looked hella good out there, Y/N. Couldn’t take my eyes off of you

Y/N: Thanks, Diggs. You weren’t too shabby yourself ;)”

Diggs: Like I said before, even though I’m not technically the bullet, I still got ammo... and you have a twenty...

Your eyes widened. A quickie? Right now of all times? You couldn't. Not with the professionals in the room.

Diggs: My dressing room in 5?

Well I’ll be damned, Lafayette’s on my side... you sung in your mind.

Y/N: Here? You sure it’ll be okay?

Diggs: I don’t share a room. Only if you’re comfortable, babygirl

You felt a pulse go to your opening when he said that. Also him calling you babygirl drew you over the edge. You also didn’t realize how much of a turn on it would be to potentially hookup in the very place the most respected people who’ve ever worked on Hamilton would be simultaneously working, unfazed at what would soon happen behind Daveed’s dressing room walls.

Y/N: I’m in

You checked yourself out in the mirror without saying a word to Michelle, made sure your flyaways were sprayed back, put some more deodorant on and gave yourself a splash of your fave perfume.

“And where the hell are you in a hurry to go to, missy?” Michelle said as you began to briskly exit out of the dressing room.

“Can’t talk, will update you later. Love ya.” You winked in her direction. Her eyes widened and she started laughing to herself as you closed the door behind you while ferociously typing a new text to get Diggs excited.

Y/N: Your shirt better be off by the time I get to your dressing room.

Diggs: Way ahead of you

Diggs: Can’t wait to hear you struggle not to moan

God damn, Diggs.

Y/N: Oh yeah? How cocky of you to assume you’d make me moan ;)

Diggs: You know I will

Diggs: And I know just how I can muffle them ;)

Fuck.

Your brisk walk turned into a light jog as you became desperate. You climbed the last set of stairs to his dressing room and stood outside of the door that was slightly cracked ajar. Here you were again, with one inch of barrier between you two. You couldn’t wait any longer.

You lightly knocked on the door and waited.

@alexander-hamilhoe

@riiyy

@lonelydance

@braidedchallah

@ohsoverykeri-blog

@roman0ffxnat

@lizzzaaaaaaaaaaa

@i-know-i-can

@vemazing

@ramp-it-up

#daveed x reader #Daveed Diggs x reader #fanfic #Hamilton fanfic #hamiltrash

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minimalisticmonstermash · 3 years

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What the Fandom (actually) thinks about the SPN Finale 15x20!

A short while ago I posted a Quiz [Which Part of Supernatural Season 16 are you?] and the post has 27 notes, so I thought barely anyone would have taken this, but it turns out actually a couple people did. And I´m so glad I did put in one free form question: “Would be please be so kind to sum up the finale in 3 words. (Or 333 if you want to...)” Because the past days I clicked through the notifications on the quiz, which is kind of tedious, but I could not stop cause what people put in there is a mood, a riot, the pure unfiltered truth, eloquent and outrageous in the best way! And so I collected the answers and tried to roughly group them. Which you can find under the cut. (If someone that took the quiz wants to be tagged or have the commentary removed please just message me!) Can you guess what the most common 3 words were?

The rare acceptance or praise not that bad // Not entirely horrible. // satisfaction and closure :D // good idea, shaky execution, ultimately fulfilling // epic love story

Grounded Truth & the well adjusted It was something // well that happened

CW & Network aka. put the blame where it (probably) belongs network fuckery afoot // Corporate Fuckery Ahoy! // network bullshit ruined everything // fuck the cw // Fuck the CW // Fuck you cw // cw ships wincest // FUCK ROBERT SINGER // Greed won

Make some Effort (@show) Lazy // half-assed fever dream // feverish dream (nightmare) // Could be better // Not comprehensible, stupid, low budget // How did buckleming do better // Fuck you, spn writers. Could have done better

Hate Crime A hate crime // literal hate crime // The hate crime // I only need 2 and it's hate and crime // subtle-but-not hate crime // hatecrime to all Homophobia Call Out Straight Gay Chicken// not gay enough // bad unsexy homophobic // Where's my gay? // horrific hetero nightmare // Homophobic queerbait bullshit // no homo shitshow // Bury your gays // silencing, erasing, ugly // Homophobic and incestual // homophobic disappointing stifd // Character assassination and homophobia // Stinky, censorship, offensive // Disappointingly heterosexual & bland You need to speak fandom for that why lamp wtf // It’s the turbo hell we were all sent to // Wheres the tapes??? Castiel centric so no cas? // So no cas? // Needs more Cas // No Cas, pathetic // where is cas // why no Cas // where was cas // yo a ti // where was castiel Bless you I released scripts for a reason

Deserving Better! Damn Right! They deserved better // They deserved better // They deserved better // dean deserved better // dean deserved better // dean deserved better // Dean deserves better // destiel deserved better // Destiel deserve better. // Jensen deserved better // dumb , idiotic , horrible and #deanwinchesterdeservedbetter

Trash, Shit & Garbage aka. The scatological truth FUCK THIS SHIT // Shit shit shit // Shit shit shit // total shit // Shittiest fucking shit// Total and utter shite. // Piece of shit // Fuck this shit // Complete utter shit // Fucking pointless shitshow // stupid As all fuck // That was shit. // A shit show // what a shitshow // An absolute shitshow // total shit show // a shit show // A shit show // total shitshow lmao // absolute shit show // A shit show // Rancid shit show // i would say it's a shitshow but that's mean to shit // Complete utter shit // fuck that shit // fuck that shit // fuck this shit // Absolute fuckin bullshit // fucked up shit // Utter shit bro // Distilled horse shit // Absolute horse shit // Absolute Horseshit. 3. // Absolute dog crap // Piece of crap // pile of crap // piece of trash // Steaming trash fire // Shit ass garbage // Gar ba ge // Fucking trash fire // Absolute garbage fire // A dumpster fire // piece of trash // unfortunate dumpster fire // Flaming pile of garbage // disaster dumpster fire // Unsatifying flaming garbage // Dumpster fire on ice. A mess. Underwhelming. Incomprehensible. Oof // I got 2: dumpster fire // Complete. Fucking. Bullshit. // Complete utter bullshit // utter gross bullshit // Shit fuck shame // hot mess inside a dumpster fire inside a train wreck

Still won´t read any praise here The worst thing // a complete disaster // so fucked up // It was terrible // it really sucked // Man it sucked // Well that sucked // Fucking sucked bro // it fucking sucked // it sucked ass it was fucked // Sucked major ass. // It sucked ass // very not good :( // it was bad :( // Absolutely fucking awful // The very worst // bad. bad. wincest... // Bad bad bad // bad poop ending // bad funni yuck // horrendous nightmare fuel // A fucking nightmare // worst thing i’ve never seen in my life // an absolute atrocity // a fucking disaster it was terrible // an absolute disgrace // Just so awful // Really Fucking Bad // Literally the worst // Real real bad // Bad stupid bad // uhh very bad // crap bad lacking // horrible rude worst // awful // bad // bad // Crap // wack Ugh. // No // UGH // Bad, messy, dumb // Bad terrible worst ugh // Oof my dude // deep deep sigh 9000+ epic failure // Small dick energy

Demands! Suck my dick // Not it motherfucker

Thinking of all of us! We all lost

Summed up in 3 Words Bitch. Fucker. Ass. // Death age heaven // Dead, married, forgotten // Sam Dead Car // Dead, Sad, & Car. // Dead, Sad, Car // Slow shambling death // burns in hell // Absurd, wtf, huh // fucking odoriferous stench.

Not Canon & Fake & Insulting insulting. not canon // Unsatisfying, degrading, noncanonical // Disgusting Insulting Fake // sad, bullshit, not-a-finale // Embarrassing, ridiculous, insulting // disheartening, harmful, horrible // Terrible. Disgusting. Hilarious // Incomplete. Unkind. Nonsensical. // Traumatising, stupid, horrendous // horrible incomplete unsuccessful // Disgusting, disrespectful, unreal

Disappointments & Complaints very big disappointment // disappointing, disrespectful, baffling // An utter disappointment // disappointment of the decade // Fruitless, regressive, insulting, disturbing, and all-in-all just disappointing // the complete unpackage // supernatural finale clusterfuck // WRONG, Horrible, Offensive // poo rehash bad // Unnecessary character deaths Betrayal & Inconsistency Stupid awful depressing poorly written inconsistent betrayal // Boring betrayal // inconsistent, monotonous mess // inconsistent disappointing mess

Denial! Aka. The wise! Finale? What finale? // What finale ? // what finale? // Finale? What finale? Ohhhh yeah 15x18 was great // you mean 15x18? // Did not happen. // What the...what?? // What finale ??? // um.........what finale? // finale? what finale. // what finale? it didn't air yet. last episode that aired was 15x18 pffft // what finale :) // Does Not Exist // It never happened // That didn’t happen // No, i refuse, there was a finale??? // what finale?? // It doesn't exist // it doesn't exist // Weird of season 15 to end with 19 episodes and an open ending // what finale? the show got canceled after 15x18 // Finale? What finale? Supernatural isn’t over. I’m not in denial, you are // an atrocity i've erased from my memory // I Can't See Suddenly. I Don't Know// Don’t know her.

Consequences & Emotions (I hope you´re all okay, have a hug!) Oh my god it was awful. Hated it. Made me reactivate in the fandom. And obses over that show AGAIN. Oh, and yeah, yeeted me to a place so dark that I got me some new scars. // Ymmmmm, fuck the finale. It got me spiraling down back to depression and self harm. Didn't make sence. Badly written. Badly executed (well, except acting) // Never wanted to claw my own face off more than watching that heap of garbage // fuckin hated it // My heart hurts // Stupid unsatisfying pain // slap inthe face // I am unhinged // Im throwing up // I am sad // i went feral // Broke my heart // hurt my feelings / I wanna die // i hate it <3 // I hated it // I hate it // Extreme rage inducing // Trauma, It was // Oh. Oh dear. // Absolute soul crushing, sucked sunshine and joy out of this world and any other possible reality this abomination exists in. It hurt so much I actually disassociated and had a real life horrible week. Luckily anger finally swept in and fan fiction ultimately saved the day. // AWFUL. HARMFUL. DEPRESSING. I HATE IT // Waste of time // My villain origin story // Destroyed rewatch value

This is unfortunately too true disturbingly pro-suicide // odd lacking empty

Valid Questions: why’d’ya do that // Why why why

WTF?! What the … “The popular 3” What The Fuck // What the fuck// what the fuck // What the fuck. // what the fuck // What the fuck // What the fuck // What the fuck. // What the fuck // What. The. Fuck. // What The Fuck // What the fuck // what the fuck // what the fuck // What the fuck // What the fuck // What the fuck?! // What. The. Fuck. // What the fuck?! // what. the. fuck. (was that????) // What the actual fuck? // 1. What 2. The 3. Fuck // 'what the fuck' // The actual fuck? // What the heck, //// What the heck // What the heck // what the hell // What the hell? // what the hell

Narative & Character Development That was pointless // Failure of storytelling // 15 years of story and character development down the fucking drain // Fuck character arcs, no free will // Assassination of character // Lost character development // character development is dead // disjointed alien mess I don't know these characters what the fuck // boring, loveless, characters are ignoring // Season 1 Finale. // From darker timeline // Awful Forgetable OOC // piece of shit all the character development thrown out the window. cas deserved better (also to be with dean cause they are in love) // Underwhelming, disappointing garbage, a slap in the face of chatacter development. // the dark ending // The Chuck ending we didn't deserve. // a dumpster fire on the level of the GoT finale - all character dev & story arc thrown out. CLOWN VAMPIRES

The Jokers among us, or those finding a laugh in the grimmest things a comedy // Just a joke

Relateable: AAAA AAAAA AAAA // AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I see what you did there and I love you 333 // 333 // 333 // 333 // 333 variations of the word fuck I especially love you 666

Rebels! 4 words (sorry): they showed their hand // The end of hope (that’s 4 words but too bad)

Didn´t watch the Finale for various reasons Haven’t seen it, // i didn't watch it out of spite // haven't seen it yet for some reason // didn’t watch it // I didn’t watch it but everything that happened because of it activated the decade-old sleeper agent part of my brain that was a spn fan // I stopped watching spn in the middle of season 12... The finale was awful from what I gathered

Hello Stranger, we welcome you here I don't actually watch SPN I'm taking this for kicks bro

The Refusal (either of the finale or the question) Nope // No thank you // no // No // No thanks, fuckers // No thank you. // No // This is bullshit // haha what? No // Please, not this // Oh god no // noooooo oooo ooo // ....no. // No. It sucks // I will not <3 // no thank you // no no no // no thank you // Lmao wtf no // Nope. Just no. Refusal is self care! No, I won't let it hurt me again. // I can't, it's too bad

The offensive Wig! Party city wig // party city wig // party city wig // Homophobic, bad, wig // shitty sam wig // party city wig // Party City Wig // party city wig // Jared's fucking wig // bad, homophobic, party city wig // The Wig™ Blurry wife Sam's blurry wife

The Nail / Rebar! ( @the-rusty-nail-that-killed-dean @therustynailthatkilleddean you are recognized) nailed by dickbar // rusty nail wins // Rusty fuckin nail. // Nail Dean Death Clown // dean got nailed // Rebar. Cas helped.

All of those Dickbar, Blurry Wife, Driving for 40yrs,Party City Wig, Drone Shot (cringe) // absolute trash fire garbage, burn the party city wig and the cw down but keep the dog

Those with crystal balls expected i guess // disappointed, not surprised

Puzzled (Yeah me too) or Undecided or Eh i don’t even fucking know // Jggfdv // Huy // Meh // Meh // meh // it was bad ??

Let´s create great fanworks!! free real estate

Defies Categories and is good stuff everything for nothing. // traumatizing, badly-written, comedic // devastating yet obnoxious // God is dead but hegemonic masculinity is still kicking // maam this is a wendys // am so glad that I was a whovian. I've dodged two bullets. // F's in the chat // >:((

I´m sorry, I failed you with this quiz quiz was wrong // Dude. Dude you gave me "liking the finale" a minute ago. I assure you; i did not. "You have found peace" bro I haven't known a SECOND of peace since that ill-begotten nightmare of a shitstorm // [[“I STILL HOPE UR DAY WAS G”:]] HOW THE FUCK DID I GET THAT I LIKED THE FINALE PLS OP THIS IS NOT A MARK ON YOU OR ANYTHIG I LOVE U EVEN IF I DON'T KNOW YOU BTU PLS THE DEPRESSIVE STATE THAT I SPENT MY LIFE IN POST-FINALE DOES NOT DESERVE TO BE SHAMED IN THIS WAY I. PLEASE. I DID NOT LIKE THE FINALE. HOW DO I GET A DIFFERENT ANSWER PLEASE

Misha? Was that you? Rancid Nut Work

Particular Stuff Fuck john Winchester // [[“ Mj”; ]]fucking disgusting shitshow [okay so that was 3 words, but MAY I JUST SAY, c*w was incredibly disrespectful to Misha, Cas, Jensen, and Dean. Misha played a Cas for 12 years, and then he's not even in the finale? and Cas gets mentioned a whopping total of 2 times after he confesses his love to Dean?? and then, Jensen. 15 years of his life on Supernatural. Jensen turned down the role to be Captain America, and his best friend is Dean, the character he plays. But then Dean dies on a rusty nail, never getting to actually live his life? Dean died how he always thought he would- and he died as "Daddy's Blunt Instrument", finishing off his dad's unfinished case. J*hn Winch*ster ab*sed him and Sam mentally, emotionally, and possibly physically too, and does NOT deserve to get a Heaven at all, least of all, a Heaven right by Deans. Dean never got to live how he wanted to and was repressed as fuck, and this is all because of his dad, the resident shit head. And don't even get me started on the queer erasure, and racism. Kevin Tran deserved better. He, after through all he suffered on Earth, deserves to go to Heaven, not be tortured in the afterlife forever. I fully believe that it's just because he was Asian. If J*hn got into Heaven, why couldn't Kevin. Also, not to mention, Charlie, Rowena, Claire, Patience, Kaia, Crowley, Donna, and Jodi, and probably countless of other queer characters who were erased. They were silenced and fuck the cw for doing that. I could add so much more, but for now, have an excellent day and a wonderful year :)] // [[“Yellowcollins”:]] hat the fuck was that literally what the fuck. I’m convinced the writers did not watch a single episode they made past season 3. There was literally not a SINGLE character from season 4 onwards in the finale. LITERALLY. NO. ONE. and what about “family don’t end in blood” that they’ve been preaching since LITERALLY season 1??? huh??????? nah fuck 15x20, this will go down and the WORST ending in the history of endings.

[cookie] < for everyone that made it that far ;)

#mmnope

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belshka · 5 years

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Complex // JJK (1)

January 16 2019

(y/n)’s POV

The clock strikes 7:00 PM. The soundcheck raffle announcement will be out soon. Why am I so excited? I must have saved the entire planet in my previous life if I got the soundcheck pass. Who am I kidding, the chance is 1 out of what, 35000? This is insane. No, this is madness. This is BTS.

It pops! The announcement post is here! My hands are cold. I saw my section, and.

And my ticket number.

My ticket number.

Should I scream? Shout? Faint? No, I take a seat on my couch. Just sit there, for 5 minutes straight, before I am able to call my friend, to break the news.

January 19 2019

This is it.

I walk into the venue, I can see the stage, and the Love Yourself World Tour banner. This is so unreal. This is massive. In just a matter of minutes I will finally see them! My heart hurts, my stomach hurts, my head hurts, yet I’m numb?

Fuck! I can hear Namjoon says hello from the stage followed by all the screams. As they walk to the extended stage where most of the soundcheck will be, I can’t help but to be mesmerized by every one of them. They’re legit god. Any arguments are invalid. I don’t know how long I’ve been zoning out until a hand shakes my shoulder from behind. “Hey are you okay? Do you need water? The security have water, I can ask for you?” Says a girl behind me. “Oh! Yes yes I’m totally fine, thanks though!” I smile back at her and bring my eyes back to the stage. Have I told you how good Jimin looks? Cause boy he looks so damn good, I actually forgot that my baby is Jungkook. They’re all my babies don’t get me wrong, even when I’m younger than the youngest but they’re still my babies. It’s been all fun and crazy how I’m able to see them like this, without make up, without the fancy clothes (although their casual clothes are still fancy). Until I notice HIM. Jungkook, with his huge ass camera, right in my direction. I -

Wait, why there is a sound of bell ringing? Am I being delusional?

Wow, I think Jungkook’s camera caught my confused and shooked face. I surely will be a meme in the BTS group chat. I try to push the weird feelings aside. You see this is weird, there is no such thing as soulmate bells or red string stuffs, or matching tattoos. I have been reading too much of fan fiction this is driving me crazy. The soundcheck ends and we are all being ushered to get back to our actual queue for the actual concert. I am so so speechless because come on, I just saw BTS! And probably gotta end up being a meme in their group chat. As I walk to find my friends, all I can think of is to call my sister, she’s also queueing but kinda far from me and my friends. “Hello?” “Oh my god, hahaha the stage is super super huge, and fuck!!! They are all so hot, sis omg, this is so unreal, I cant even believe my own eyes!” (I can’t believe my ears either) “Hahaha you had fun?” “Yes! Of course, where are you? Queuing already?” “Yup” “Okay then, I’ll see you inside!” The call ended as I spot my friends. I tell them everything, except my delulu self that heard the bell rings.

Jungkook’s POV

Another concert, another fun day. I can’t wait to see ARMY! Although I am tired from all the practices and flights, but I live for this, for the thrill, most importantly for those smiles. That I surely know are made for us, and because of us. In just a couple minutes I have to go up the stage for a short soundcheck, this is my favorite part of all because I can see them very clearly, the soundcheck was our idea, it is more intimate, although it seems unfair for those who’re not here, but this is the least we can do to get closer to our lovely ARMY. As Namjoon Hyung says hello, the crowd screams back, and I can already feel my lips forming a huge huge smile just knowing that they are here for us. I have my camera with me during every soundcheck, I feel like I have to capture every moment so I wont forget any details. The soundcheck goes well as usual, Hoseok hyung is having a little talk with ARMY as I shoot a video of him, then I move my camera to the crowd. I -

I hear the sound of bell ringing! What?! I cannot help but to find those eyes, and I finally found them, looking straight into my direction. She looks so confused, yet so beautiful. I bet she knows, I just hope she won’t go crazy. But, she closes her eyes and shakes her head. As if she does not want to believe it. I keep my eyes on her for awhile, my camera still recording her area, but I know for sure I have it zoomed in to her. She looks away first. She doesn’t believe in soulmates. I can see her head down for awhile, but I try my best not to look so obvious because I have been taught how to act if by any craziest chance I will find my soulmate like this. Which is to pretend it did not happened. To stay normal. But is it normal to ignore the existence of your soulmate? How soulmate works is weird, I don’t think the world notice it but when it comes to soulmate, you’ll never know. Every body has one, but the process is different, I don’t know about others, but surely mine is the bell.

We’re back at the waiting room, to get everything done, the make up, the script, the hair, outfits, and all. But I am still stuck. Starstruck? Is that the word? I never thought that my soulmate will be a foreigner? And an ARMY? Yes, ARMY. It feels like I’m living the best life. But also the saddest and tragic one, because I can do nothing. In this line of work, I have to stay like this. To give the best out of me. To sacrifice things. I hope in the end it will be worth the wait and sacrifice. “Jungkookieeeeeeeeeeee, why are you so saddddd?” Jin hyung asks from the couch while having his food. “Nothing hyunggggggg, just sleepy” I say as I walk into his direction and take a seat beside him. “Yah, be honest. Are you really sleepy or you found the one?” Jin hyung whispers. I can only look him in his eyes and hoping that he can read me. “Ayeeee I knew it. Which section?” He asks again. “Right side.” “Our right side or their right side?” “Ours.”

During the opening speech I try so hard to spot her, but I cant. The lights are blinding, and the size of the venue is not helping at all. I keep taking off my in ear just to talk to Jin hyung, praying that maybe he can help me spot her. As we’re about to sing Magic Shop, this is my chance to actually look for her in the pit so I walk slowly to the right stage while scanning the crowd, and I almost burst out laughing because I can see her running from nowhere into the back barricade. She’s something else. I look at her few seconds and I can see her very clearly because she is just by the barricade with her Army Bomb and her phone obviously recording ME. So I took my chance to go a little closer and I can see her friend slaps her right arm and screams something that I can’t really hear. But she’s unbothered. She’s so focus that I can tell her phone is not recording properly. Gosh she’s so funny, I can’t help but let a small giggle out while I shake my head, and walk back to the main stage. I can see her during Euphoria, I can’t really focus. She does not has her phone, I don’t know if she’s crying or not but she is standing in between her friends who are hugging her. It’s a beautiful view. Euphoria is the last time I saw her. Jin hyung spotted her during medley and Run. I’m so desperate to see her, this is my last chance. I keep on getting to the right side of the stage just to find her, until Anpanman, I can see her! I CAN SEE HER! I am so excited I can not contain my smile, I keep on dancing and hanging around the area. Last, it hits me during the closing, Answer : Love Myself, I have my in ear off and just so sad that this may be my last time seeing her. I try fight back my tears, I don’t think I sing properly, I hope no one notice. As we all walk back to the main stage, I look everywhere in her section hoping that I can see her for the last last time, shit I can’t see her. After the final bow I still give it a try, I walk a little bit to the extended stage but I still can not find her. I give up, giving my last smile before I walk off stage. And there my tears fall freely, I sit by the stairs to calm myself down because this is all too much, I have to fly to another country, leaving her, without any information. Without her knowing that I am her soulmate. My heart breaks even more, until Jimin hyung come to me and comfort me. He is truly the fairy. “Its okay Jungkookieeee, the chance will come sooner or later. You are soulmate, you’ll end up with each other. So don’t worry okay, you’ll find her. We will find her. Okay? Don’t cry, besides you did very good today!” All I can do is to let out some sniffles as we both walk back to the waiting room to meet the others for concert photo.

(y/n)’s POV

The pit is crazy, I decided to stay at the back so it will be easier for me to run around to wherever Jungkook is heading. Bitch be running wherever her bias is heading, that bitch is me. Oh fuck, this is my song. Magic Shop, I literally scream each and every word out of my lungs. When I realize where Jungkook is heading, I literally run for my life to the back barricade and thank God it’s still empty. His legs ugh, he is sweating like crazy it makes him glow even more. I have my useless Army Bomb with me, and my phone, trying to record and capture Jungkook as much as I can because who knows, this may be my first and last. But luck was not on my side, I forgot to press record. I cannot scream, but Jungkook is too close, he is too close and my friend fucking slapped my arm. I could not careless all I see is him, too close, too close. Jesus bless my pure soul cause Jungkook just giggled? Why is he so funny.

Before the concert, days before the concert. I did my research very well, I know the whole setlist and where will they perform it. The stage and all so I know right after Just Dance, will be Euphoria at the main stage. I kinda make my way towards the stage with my two friends. “hey (y/f/n), can you please record the whole performance because I don’t think I can record it..” With that being said, the lights dim a little and I can hear the intro. I got goosebumps all over my body, I can’t believe that I finally able to see it live. Woah my body will collapse soon, my tears start to fall very quick. My friends notice and laugh but they have me in between them. Most of the time I stay at the back because I want to focus on the performance, plus I’m super tired I have not eaten anything yet today so I was at the back with water from the security. But I gained my energy back during medley and encore. Anpanman! Oh my god, I can see Jungkook again! Very clear because he is always on our side. I recorded his little cute dance. The 2 hours concert feels like a minute, they are at the extended stage for Answer : Love Myself, but boy is holding back tears. I feel a pang in my heart, and my lungs are lacking of oxygen. It hurts, my eyes are burning. I know this song will always have that effect on me but I don’t know that it will be like this. They walk back to the main stage for the final final bow, I smile through my tears and when the lights bout to turn off, Jungkook walk back a little for another goodbye while scanning through the crowd. This boy, he loves army that much. He smiles before it turns completely dark and the lights back without the boys on stage. I stay for some pictures with my friends, and my sister.

I say nothing about my weird feelings and the sound of the bell cause what kind of a crazy and delusional fan am I. So while waiting for the crowd to die down a little, I sit on the grass outside the venue while looking through my videos briefly, talking about the concert. The crowd somewhere goes crazy because apparently BTS is leaving for their hotel, but I could not careless because heck I’ve spent my entire day standing and waiting, I need to sit and rest my legs. And my crazy heart.

January 20 2019

Jungkook’s POV

Today is my last day here and I have no chance to explore because I have to fly back to Seoul.

(y/n)’s POV

Today is my last day here, I explore and shop a bit at the city before heading to the airport because I have to fly back home. Thank you (country), for the unforgettable night.

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glamrockmonarch · 5 years

Text

The Flu: Ben Hardy Mini Series

Part 2. Not Meant To Be

Mini Series Masterlist | Part 1 | Part 3

Words: 4335

Summary: You are an actress and worked with the boys in BoRhap, after the premiere and press tour you wind up working on another project with one of them; Ben. As your roles are tied together you find yourselves spending more and more time in each other’s company, becoming closer than ever and developing feelings. Ben cannot bring himself to ruin what you have with another one of your friends by acting on these new found love until you get sick out of the blue right in the middle of the production and this sparks something between the two.

A/N: I tried my best but I think this one is a little rushed due to the number of events I wanted to get in here (we don’t even get to the good Mozzarella Sticks bits yet!) without making it too long... anyway, I would love your feedback on this and maybe you could help me decide if a fourth chapter would be a good idea. Let me know, and ENJOY!

You stared at Ben with tearful eyes, he looked down and licked his lips before his blue eyes full of sorrow found yours.

“I’m afraid not.” He reached up to put his right hand on your cheek.

You took a step back, a tear escaping the corner of your eye.

“We are to move to New Zealand. Your father has given his blessing and you are my wife now.”

Ben stepped closer to you and cupped your face, your chest heavied trapped in a tight corset. You felt a slow stream of tears slide down your cheek, met by his thumb. You fail to turn away to his touch although it is written on the script.

“Goddamnit!” You think to yourself. “Maybe if I tense up my neck?”

“I -“ you stuttered, “I don’t want to go.” You admitted.

Ben blinked and his eyes fell on your bright pink lips.

“CUT!” The director yelled from behind the camera, “Y/N, he is the man making you leave the love of your life, leave your home and family, you are about to leave the country forever! Is this the energy you want to give me?”

Ben stepped back and the two of you turned to look at the director.

“I guess not....but she was raised to be quiet and hold back!” You reasoned, trying to extend your back in your costume.

“Exactly!” The director grabbed you by the shoulders and shook you, “forget all that, convince him to stay! Go wild!”

Turning to look at Ben you saw him squinting at the director.

“And you,” Ben straightened up, “get out of your head, this is a tense moment. Make it count! Jack’s a villain in this moment!”

You struggled to look annoyed and uncomfortable around Ben, so the director had to intervene. You ended up ditching some parts of the script in favour of more dramatic lines.

Henry, the man directing, told Ben to go with something a lot harsher.

“Bring Percy into it.”

It was a simple instruction, but it made the biggest difference. Once the cameras were rolling again Ben was almost scary.

“I -“ you stuttered again, “I don’t want to go.” You admitted in a small voice.

Ben’s hands dropped from your face and his jaw became tense.

“Because of Percy. Right?” He stepped closer to you and you blinked in confusion.

Of course, your character was in love with a farm boy who worked for her family but she had to cut all ties to him in order to marry Mister Everleigh - Ben’s role.

“I do not know-“ you started, taking a step back.

“Oh, please Miss Jones! I am not a fool!” Ben licked his lips. “You clearly love him. Do tell me, were you expecting to have an affair with him?”

“Excuse me?” Your eyes widened. “I am offended! Mister Jones, I assure you-“

Ben cut you off again.

“I will manage my family’s business in New Zealand. And you will come with me as my wife.” He said harshly. “This... Percy boy will not be around. So forget about him. Forget about your dirty little farm and your country boy. You are Gwyn Everleigh - my wife, and you will come with your husband to New Zealand.”

You stared at Ben with tearful eyes, imagining your character’s heart to be breaking at these words coming out of his mouth. Gwyn Jones would feel her soul crushed under this burden, becoming an Everleigh and getting on that ship...traveling to another country without her family to bear some evil man’s children. Gwyn would have felt like screaming, but she would hold back because she was taught to do so.

“I understand Mister Everleigh.” You said with your voice cracking, looking down and excusing yourself before leaving through the hall with cameras following your every move.

The director cut and you let out a loud scream outside of the set. You were still in character when Ben ran outside to see what was happening with you.

Not having heard the director say cut, once Ben approached you, you lashed out.

“Don’t! Don’t touch me...” You slapped his hands. “I didn’t ask for this!”

Ben frowned, unable to understand you hadn’t heard you were not rolling anymore.

The blonde tried to touch your arm and as he did you slapped him across the face, half the crew gasping at it.

“I said don’t touch me!” I cried out.

“Y/n! Y/n!” Henry intervened while Ben held his cheek in his hand.

He blonde would hate to admit you were quite strong for your size.

“Oh, my!” You covered your mouth with your hands. “Ben, I’m so sorry!” You apologised and went to check on him.

“I like that, can we shoot that?” Henry turned to one of the producers.

You sighed and looked away from Ben.

“Shit, I’m sorry! I didn’t hear him, I just...” you admitted, “I hate it!”

Ben was confused and looked around for help, not knowing what to say. You pressed your palm against his cheek and gave him an apologetic smile.

“It got better for Gwyn,” he tried to console you, “Jack is a good man, he just...he was jealous...” Ben explained.

The director watched you talk about the scene you had just improvised and heard you go on about your character.

“She was scared!” You cried out, dropping your hand from his face, “Gwyn doesn’t even know Jack! She thought she would at least have her sisters to turn to! Now Jack is jealous? Jealous?! Of what!”

You turn to Henry and shook your head.

“And then he pretty much rapes her the second they arrive in New Zealand!“

“Hey, hey!” There was little to defend there but Ben still felt as attached to his role as you did. “He watched her kiss Percy!” Ben explained. “He didn’t mean to hurt Gwyn!”

“Well, he did!”

Before things could go any further, as usual, Henry had you go back to your marks to keep working.

“You two are gonna be fun to work with on the press tour!” Henry pat both of your backs.

It was a long week of shooting, the last one. The last scene you shot was one with Trine Dyrholm, who played your mother. It was a somewhat easy short scene, but you had to repeat it a few times before the director got all the shots he wanted.

“It’s a wrap ladies!” You were happy to hear Henry congratulate you and Trine.

You celebrated later when the whole production wrapped. Craig and Ben filmed their last scenes together and the crew cheered and clapped.

“It’s a wrap!” Everyone repeated.

You were still in costume when the boys made their way behind the monitor to hug you. Craig was the first to wrap his arms around you, having met you during readings before shooting started, he was glad to be done and promised to stay in touch with you after this.

“You better call me, Craig!” You warmed him with your eyes widening.

He laughed and turned to see Ben joking with Beth.

Everyone in the crew and cast seemed to know you and Ben had something going on between you, whether you knew it or not was something they couldn’t decipher.

“Y/N!” Ben wrapped his arms around you and lifted you up, making you hold on to his shoulders for dear life. “It’s a wrap!”

“It’s a wrap!” You grinned at each other in excitement.

Everyone was happy and sad, it was a big mixture of feelings around the set. The crew was glad it was over because they were proud of the work that they had put into the film, as the cast was too. But there was a melancholic vibe around that nobody could deny; this was the realisation that you would never be together like you had been for the past few months ever again. If there was a second part to this film, which was something possible, the crew would probably not be the same, only the main characters would get called back to take their roles and that if the characters were not written off or grown older - which could mean re-casting. It was time to face it for everyone; the production was over.

That night you had the wrap party, where you got to hang out with everyone and have a bit of a farewell. Henry, your amazing director made sure to thank his employees and you had a great time, besides, the next morning there was something to look forward to... shaving Ben’s sideburns.

Although you partied till well into the am, you woke up early and made sure to text your friends.

Gwilym was happy to hear you were free from work now, at least you would be for a couple of weeks now until you had a date for your meeting with some executives for your next big project.

“Hi, how are you?” Gwil called.

You and Gwil had been very close during the production of borhap since you played the part of his wife.

“Great!” You replied honestly through the phone and asked how he was doing in return.

Gwil had a way of speaking that seemed to soothe people, for you it was like standing in front of the calm waters of a river; hearing him talk about his projects and plans for the next few days made you feel some sense of normality, even though you felt out of place standing in your kitchen at 10 in the morning while you had been running around set at this same time for the past few months.

“I heard you are going to this fashion show next week.” Gwil inquired, he was aware thanks to Joe that it was an important trip and since Joe was his friend he had been asked to get some information from her.

Joe was nervous about asking you out, he wanted to for a long time now, ever since you were in New York earlier in the year he had been sure about his feelings toward you. Joe missed you, he wanted to talk to you, listen to your voice, see you smile, hold you, kiss you… and he knew that if he wanted to take this relationship to next level he had to get a move on. So he asked his friends to lend him a hand. Ben was supposed to get you to go where you had to go, Rami and Lucy were told to keep people away while Joe talked to you, and Gwil was given the golden task of asking if you were even interested in Joe like that.

“Yeah, Ben and I are flying there together.” You announced, your face lighting up without you noticing. “It’s a shame you aren’t coming, we will miss you!” You said.

“Aw, I’m sorry, I’ll be in America for once!” Gwil explained. “I guess it will be nice to see Rami and Lucy...and Joe…” He tried to be smooth.

You giggled at the mention of Joe; he had been adorably annoying since he heard you had confirmed your assistance to the fashion show in Paris.

“Yeah, I think Joe will tackle me the second he sees me…” You predicted, to which Gwil chuckled. “I wouldn’t blame him, he lives across the pond! Don’t we all miss his chaotic energy around?”

Gwil agreed. “Sounds like that’s gonna be a hard goodbye.” He commented.

“I mean…” You heard a car outside, “Joe’s lovely to have around, but so are the rest of you. I think I might just hide in someone’s luggage and see where that gets me…” You rambled absentmindedly with your eyes scanning the windows to look outside and see who it is.

There is a knock on your door and you apologise to your friend.

“Why don’t you text me later, we should go out for coffee or something, could tell Lucy and Ben too.” You proposed as you left the open kitchen area to go to the door.

“I’d love that.” Gwil sounded pleased.

“I’ve got to go, Gwil...but seriously, congratulations on Top End Wedding.” You reached out to the doorknob. “I’ll see you soon! Bye!”

“Thanks, bye!”

Hanging up the phone you turned the knob and waited to see who it could be on the other side of the door. Not too surprisingly, you found Ben there and let him in without saying anything. He pressed a kiss to your cheek and you gave him one back, stepping aside so he came in and closed the door behind himself.

“Time to get rid of this thing!” Ben announced once you turned to him.

He rubbed his jaw and touched his sideburns.

“Guess you couldn’t wait then.” You said.

Ben was unable to refute you, he was eager to get rid of the hair, it was starting to become too much, so he wanted the sideburns gone and a haircut to go with his polished look. You extended your hand and Ben handed you a small bag with the necessary utensils to shave. Together, you walked down the hall and into your small bathroom.

“So when are you leaving?” Ben asked from his improvised seat on the edge of the bathtub.

You prepared everything on the counter next to the sink and tried to count the days.

“I think I’m going back home next month.” You announced.

The truth was, you were not used to living in London. You just went there regularly, but you still had your home in Cardiff.

“I’ll miss you, you know?” Ben said, biting his tongue after, mentally cursing at himself for admitting this.

“I’ll miss you too, Ben.” You turned to him in your pajamas and offered him a side smile.

You noticed Ben wore a pair of trainers and sweatpants. He nodded his head and his expression mirrored yours.

Clapping your hands and sighing, you got to business and grabbed the razor to shave the sides of his head. You were careful and kept focused on not cutting him, your eyes on his face and one of your hands cupping his cheek while you run the razor down his face. Ben did not dare speak, so he wouldn’t distract you or make you move the blades wrong. It was not possible to avoid, Ben put his hands on your hips while you stood between his legs to shave the rest of his face. Once you were done you pressed the lotion on his skin and ran your fingers along his chin.

“Served, mister.” You smiled down at him and caught him staring.

Ben’s hand did not leave your hips and you were made aware of the contact as you dropped your hands on his shoulders. You remained like this for a few minutes before you gathered the courage to move.

It had been enough, too long since you deciphered the meaning of the fluttering in your stomach when you were together. You ran a hand through Ben’s hair and leant down to press your lips against his. Ben did not move, too scared, too involved to pull away.

He let you kiss him and even worse, he kissed you back. Moving his lips against yours and breathing in the sweet scent of coconut coming from your hair. You cupped his face and Ben’s arms wrapped around you to pull you closer. He would later regret it, but now he could not deny: your lips felt like heaven and he was craving for more. You parted your lips and let his tongue come in contact with yours, it was much more than it had been when you were on set. This was not a pretend kiss, this was real and it felt like it too. You moved your legs so you could straddle Ben and once you did, Ben’s arms tightened around your middle, his hands finding the small of your back and your neck.

As you pulled away for air you pressed your nose against Ben’s cheek and suddenly it all came crashing down on him.

Ben was not supposed to kiss you, he was meant to stay away from you. Joe had told him how he felt about you, this was a horrible thing to do to a friend… so ben did what he had to make it right to his friend because he owed him at least this. He pushed you away and rushed to pick up his stuff.

“What-what’s wrong?” You jumped back as Ben put everything back into his little bag.

“This.” He said, shaking his head. “Y/N, I...I’m sorry.” He blinked because he had to say things he did not feel, but he needed to make sure you would forget about this. Ben could not stab Joe in the back like this. “This is wrong… I’m sorry if I led you on…”

“Lead me on?” You frowned, “Ben…”

“You are my best friend,” Ben reassured you, although he was trying to convince himself. “You are, and I want it to be that way.”

You were shocked, embarrassed...terrified! What had you just done?! It sounded like Ben meant this, you were fooled. He looked serious, you were unable to tell if he was mad, but he did not look like someone who was making this up.

With a hand on your mouth, you nodded and then you looked away. How could you make it right with a friend who you had just kissed under the impression that your feelings would be reciprocated? You felt all colour leave your face and a sudden need to run and hide settle in your stomach making your hands shake.

“I’m so sorry, Ben!” You rushed to explain, “I...I…” You covered your mouth again. “It won’t happen again!” You frowned.

Your voice was small and shaky. Ben looked at you over his shoulder and felt sick to his stomach. Your concern was visible. He looked away again, picked up his stuff and sighed.

“Please don’t go?” You whispered.

It was too late, you had ruined everything. Ben gave you one last glance and mumbled something about seeing you later before he stormed out of the house. You were heartbroken and felt tears stream down your face the second you heard the front door close.

Ben decided he would act as if nothing had happened when he met you a week later at the airport. You did not speak about what happened, in fact, you did not even speak for days after the bathroom incident. Ben was feeling guilty about it and you were sure that if you tried to talk about it with him you would only ruin your friendship - which you felt was hanging by a string.

Without making a big deal out of it, Ben assured Joe that he would be fine asking you out and when the time came to meet up at the airport, you were past the initial shock and made no effort to bring up the topic of your status.

It was clear to the two of you that friendship was all there would be between you, even if it broke your hearts, but you dealt with it as you sat together on the plane. The flight was short and you spent the whole time talking.

“This haircut really suits you,” you said to him and then touched your own hair, “I think my manager is sending me to the hairdresser soon, honestly I wouldn’t mind.”

Ben chuckled.

“You look beautiful as it is, no need for any changes.” He assured you.

Knowing better than to take his comment as a compliment bigger than it was supposed to be, you made a mental note not to blush.

“Thanks,” you changed the topic, “I am going to New York next week.”

Ben frowned, intertwining his hands on his lap as he heard you. He waited for you to elaborate and when you did he felt his heart sink. Of course, once Joe heard of this he would be thrilled. And he himself was happy for you, although his stomach turned to the thought of you being so far away for what would probably be a long time.

“I am being offered a roll by Netflix. I’m meeting with the producers and maybe signing before coming back.” You smiled. “It’s a series, but I think…” You nodded, sucking air through your teeth, “I think it could be big. I like the script very much.”

Ben blinked and forced himself to smile, reaching out and squeezing your hand.

“That’s great! You’ll do amazingly, Y/N! You are very talented, I bet you’ll snatch some awards soon.”

You blushed at that and looked away, raising your brows and squeezing his hand back before leaning your head on his shoulder. You sighed and closed your eyes.

“I know you’ll make it big soon.” You mumbled, “so I hope we can both have what we want.”

Arriving in Paris things became hectic. You were separated from Ben to go to your hotels, an assistant helped you with your things and after a quick lunch at a local café, you were whisked away again into your hotel to get ready for the show. A “glam squad” ready for you.

You had your hair done and your eyebrows waxed, your toes pedicured and your dress ironed to perfection. With your hair and makeup all done you were helped into a dress by the same designer you were seeing that evening.

“Alright, alright, we need to go!” Your assistant said once the car stopped outside the venue.

Looking around you could not see any of your friends, so you walked through the hall on your own. Some cameras shot pictures of you and you offered friendly smiles at them, not knowing what was coming your way…

“Would you take the picture?” A voice you knew too well said behind you as the weight of an arm was placed around your shoulders.

Your brows shot up with your eyes widening. Turning your head you saw the dark hair and the long nose. The friendly smile made you feel better about everything, your confidence boosted and your still sore heart felt slightly lighter and warmer.

“Joe!” You giggled and wrapped your arms around him, letting him hold you too while the camera flashes went wild. “Oh, I missed you!”

Joe chuckled and kissed your temple before pulling away, he grabbed your hands and looked down at you, pointing at your outfit.

“You look beautiful…” He brought a hand to his chest and his brown eyes looked into yours. “Come on, we should be goin’ in there!”

You nodded and turned to wave at the cameras. Joe’s hand found yours and you smiled back at him while you walked into the showroom together. Your seats were right next to each other so while people poured in you two had a chance to catch up, ignoring everyone around you. As you laughed with joe you forgot to catch up with Lucy and Rami, although they knew of Joe’s plans and did little to still your attention.

The show passed you by in a flash. The show was great, while Joe made smart little comments on your ear and made you bite your tongue to keep from laughing out loud you set your eye on some of the pieces, ready to ask if you could wear them later for events, maybe during promotions for projects or appearances.

“Y/N, how long will you be in Paris?” Lucy wondered after the lights went down once the show was over.

Being on the front row, the smartest move from you was to wait till the people left the room before you even attempted exiting.

“I’m leaving on Monday morning, you?”

Lucy giggled and intertwined her arm with Rami’s as he talked to Ben, who had not said a word to you all night except for a weak “hello” from earlier.

“Me too… we should go somewhere! Rami is trying to find his mum a gift, thought we could help him.”

“Are you sure?” You frowned and mimicked her but with Joe instead of Rami. “Won’t I be third wheeling?”

Joe put his chin on your naked shoulder and pouted. “‘course not! I could go to…” he said smoothly, “make it a double date instead!”

You laughed at that and watched Lucy bite her lip.

You sensed the air change and tilted your head to the side to put your eyes on a curious looking Joe.

“Mozzarella Sticks,” you used his nickname, “are you for real?”

Joe had turned to Lucy when Ben explained to him that he was going to be late to the show, he was supposed to help him as you out, but he backed out last minute, so yes, he turned to Lucy for help. And here you were, caught off guard and surprised.

Still, Joe felt confident looking at the way your eyes lit up.

“I am.” He straightened up and put his hand on your thigh with the palm looking up.

His eyes fell to his hand and yours followed. With your heart shrinking, you remembered how embarrassed you had been after Ben rejected you. How could you reject Joe?

With a small smile, you told yourself that there was nothing to lose. Joe was your friend, the one who made you laugh without fail. He had made sure to ask how you were doing when you got sick and he even sent you a big bear when he had the chance, although by the time it had arrived you were back working.

“Well...” You put your hand on his and watched your fingers intertwine. “I’d like that.”

An excited looking Joe leant forward to press a loud kiss to your cheek while Lucy clapped in the background, Rami mumbling a “finally!” and a quiet Ben nodding at his friends with a forced smile.

taglist: @shanetoo @artemisiaarm @sarai-ibn-la-ahad @wint-er-voices @onceuponathreetwoone @imamazzellhoe @mrsmazzello @kyleetheeditor @godessforyou @gwilymswife

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mantra4ia · 5 years

Text

My Top/Bottom “10″ Moments of Avengers: Endgame [Spoilers Ahead]

In no particular rank…

The Good and the Legendary Moments (I had a hard time limiting it to 10, clearly there are more)

Cap’s “don’t do anything stupid while I’m gone” and Bucky’s reprise “How can I? You’e taking all the stupid with you…I’m gonna miss you.” He knows his friend well enough through all the years that he understands and accepts (and in that second, we do too) that Cap’s not coming back the fast way, that he’s chosen the slow path to the end of the line.

Sam inheriting the Shield from Rogers with Bucky’s blessing, “go to him.” Because Bucky knows that, even though they are the best of friends and fellow supersoldiers, Sam has kept an eye on Steve while Bucky was MIA, and that puts him in a reasonable position to inherit the mantle.

Post-snap “5 years later” we see Steve taking up Sam’s role as a group counselor, our first hint at the transition of roles later to come, capped off with Sam emerging from the portal with a timely “on your left.”

Hawkeye’s opening: the very real, personal, character driven moment in which Clint is with his family, and shortly thereafter the snap is dragged out of retirement kicking and screaming.

Tony’s and Stark’s intellectual interactions which began as animosity and conlcuded as a kind of mutual admiration “is this the one we win? / if I tell you, it won’t happen (almost apologetically because Strange knows what is about to happen and is letting it go forward anyway),” culminating with “I am Iron Man” and thunderous applause.

EVERYTHING having to do with Tony’s daughter Morgan. From her interaction with Jon Favreau aka Happy about cheeseburgers, to finding her dad’s suit mask, to Stark calculating time-travel while doing the dishes, then swearing, then swearing Morgan to secrecy, and most heartrendingly “I love you 3000.” Tony’s father-daughter relationship is one of those key character pieces that elevates this whole film from a Marvel capstone to a best picture.

Steve’s moment watching Peggy even though he never interacts with her, in 70s at the Pymm/Stark research facility. It’s the most poignant foreshadow of his destination to come. He doesn’t make that mistake twice.

Natasha’s character development. Five years later, even as she falls apart spinning her wheels about deep sea tectonic quakes, and she still cuts her peanut butter sandwich corner to corner as if daring “Nick” Fury to unsnap himself and say “no, let me show you how it’s done.” Two great insights into the depth of their familial relationship courtesy of the Captain Marvel film. Also a shout-out Steve’s subsequent offer to cook Nat dinner. Steve and Nat always carry great character moments, all the way back to CA:WS when she was setting him up on dates.

The small moments of battlefield humor that were just enough not to break the moment: Steve calling out to Parker “Hey Queens,” Peter engaging the Spidey suit kill mode and then him curled up in the fetal position, Wong’s deadpan “were you expecting more?” Jesus, just give Wong an entire act in the next Doctor Strange movie and I will be happy. I adore him. PS: what a pleasant surprise the way the Russos put Tilda Swinton in as Sorcerer Supreme opposite Banner. That was just the right character for the exposition on the perils of altered reality.

The overarching theme of premonitions as it deals with crossing through the quantum realm into the past, and the ensuing parallels from what we’ve already seen in the Marvel past. Specifically the ‘premonitions’ that past-Nebula had when future Nebula past through time and how they could access each others memories, which puts the interesting and poetic possibility that Tony’s dreams/visions this whole time (ex: Infinity War’s “[Pepper] we had a kid, it was so real”) were never a direct result of Thanos, but rather his travel through time. The Time Travel element also relates to parallels where Howard Stark meets “Howard Potts” and the potshots at his questionable beard. Tony meets Stark Sr. at the exact right moment when Maria is expecting and they relate to the perils and joys of fatherhood: “there’s no manual for this/ there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for this kid / you did your best”, which sets up Howard’s video journal to Tony and Tony’s post-battle video journal to Morgan as even more powerful together, in the context of each other, then when we saw the original Iron Man films. Endgame brings new depth / meaning to those historic moments.

Honorable mention to Thor who, after the “I aimed for the head” reprise, developed a sense of crippling anxiety and notable weight gain within his depressive reclusiveness, and still managed to suit up and be a hero anyway. While I didn’t necessarily like the fact that Thor dealt with his PTSD through hardcore gaming, I like the direction that the Russo’s steered him after subsequently calling him an “Angel Pirate” in Infinity War. The message, by contrast, that you don’t have to look a certain way, or step into the role that everyone expects of you (King of Asgard), or even have your shit together to be heroic - you just have to step your foot out of the door and face the day - is damn brilliant.

Honorable mention #2: Rocket’s speech to Thor “you’re not the only person to have ever lost someone.” Great BroTP, with tha dash of crossover Whovian.

Honorable trifecta: Steve Rogers wielding the Mjolnir and FINALLY. FIN-A-LLY “Avengers: Assemble!” What great standing ovation moments.

OVERALL: What this film misses in building the tension (it cycles down before it revs up), it makes up for by setting up the small, poignant character moments that show off the emotional talent of these actors in a way that I’ve never seen with this impact before: Infinity War, Black Panther, and Civil War being the runners up.

The Disappointing:

The “Smart Hulk” / Ant Man “little man” gag didn’t work for me. The autographs, the tacos, the test time travel run. It got stale very quickly.

Speaking of Ant Man, by contrast to Tony and Morgan, Scott Lang’s reunion with his daughter after 5 years didn’t hit the emotional note it was meant to. It make sense how they use Lang as perspective of “what’s going on / fish out of water” to drive the aftermath of the snap home and to introduce quantum science. But out of all the characters, I was probably least invested in him.

The female-led gauntlet scrimmage in the final act across the battlefield felt like more of a “set piece” rather than really earned emotion by comparison to Infinity War’s female tag team (Okoye, Nat, and Wanda) against Proxima, where Nat defends Wanda and says “she’s not alone.”

I didn’t like the script choice of killing the complex, Infinity War version of Thanos so quickly (while it was unexpected and paid off big time for a hot second when Thor’s said “I aimed for the head”) and taking on Past-Thanos. For me, it undermined and underdeveloped the villain. I would have wanted a deeper understanding of “The Garden” and flashbacks to Titan or young Gamora, or even more interaction between him and his daughter present-Nebula, before the war-torn Thanos gets the 1-2 chop, but I understand the choice given time constraints of a three hour film.

Hawkeye’s ronin montage: his revenge against criminals in the post-snap era, “why are you here, why did you get to survive and my family didn’t?” could have had the ability to be powerful, especially considering that Natasha has been keeping tabs on him and didn’t intervene until critical mass. But instead, I feel like it was mishandled, too thematic, it takes your out of the moment like a set piece.I loved Natasha’s bond with Clint up to and after the ronin sequence, it took two characters that I was on the fence with and got me emotionally invested in them as a team, I just hated the montage itself.

No Vision? What?! Hardly even a mention in this film except for Wanda’s wrath when she is resurrected and brings that house down on Thanos, but even then Thanos essentially said “who the heck are you and what did I do to make you mad?” completely taking the steam out of Vision’s fall. Hopefully Phase 4 addresses / fixes that.

No Loki resurrection? At the very least, no past-Loki dialogue?! Come on. I thought for a second, when Loki escaped STRIKE custody in the alternate timeline with the tessaract, that maybe the team had created a and untrimmed time branch (I still think they did, because if Rogers returned the Stone to 1970, it doesn’t fix the later botched attempt to steal it, so maybe there’s a branch reality where Loki is alive with witty trickster lines and I’ll cling to it). Then I was fooled again when Mjolnir went flying through the air I thought perhaps that Loki Odinson had returned and was worthy to wield it through his selfless sacrifice (I was only momentarily disappointed / awed to see it was Cap instead). Again, Phase 4, give me some help here!

The fact that Black Widow got no proper funeral sendoff, concluding Natasha’s long history of under-use throughout the entire Infinity Saga. Don’t get me wrong: I understand her soul stone sacrifice, and in a way I understand the people who say, “don’t take that away from her, it’s powerful.” It is. She comes from a manipulative, violent background that made her who she is and good at what she does. Throughout her history, she never had family, which she admits: “Red Skull knew my father’s name, that’s more than I ever did.” So it makes the choice more poignant that she built a family around herself and did whatever it took to keep them safe and united. That said, I wasn’t (until this film) necessarily invested in Black Widow like I am the other Avengers characters, but she’s had some great moments with Clint (I still want to see the Budapest mission, and the Iran extraction that Bucky compromised) and Rogers (Endgame: I’ve been telling everyone to move on, but not us. Winter Soldier: their getaway from Hydra-infested SHIELD) and Fury. Which is why I HATE that her only tribute was a bunch of men standing around lamenting over her (while simultaneously being oblivious to the Nebula swap, seemingly incapable of intelligent script development by McFeely and Markus around those two female characters). It would have at least been fitting if they had more regrets “why didn’t we know her better, we were supposed to be her family”, “why didn’t we appreciate her while we could” or her name added to an altered “fallen” monument. There was no payoff to her chemistry with Bruce, and no final closure with un-dusted Fury to pay his respects, which would have been a small but vastly fitting gesture. WHAT A WASTE.

Captain Marvel’s use in the film as essentially a ballistic, ship-destroying missile and her anticlimactic Thanos battle. Why use her at all in this film if it’s going to be as a plot device? She could have had potential opposite Thor, and I’ll argue that she should have been Banner’s tag-team person to bring him out of new-Asgard exile. But the Russos and writing team missed that opportunity as well. Danvers’ appearance felt hollow.

The pacing / cycle down of tension post-opening sequence was off-putting to me. I was revved up to level 10 ready to go to 11, but had to dial back down by half (ex: even though I love the montage of Tony and Nebula playing table football, it crawls by comparison to the expectations set right after Infinity War). The tonal shifts between the three acts of Endgame made me feel like I was watching two good films as opposed to the one great, legendary film I was expecting. Perhaps I came in to Endgame too pumped and needed to be more in the moment, because this displaced feeling was very strong on initial viewing, but faded the second time I saw the film.

Honorable mentions: Parts of the alternate reality “time travel” sequence really bothered me: ie the battle of New York (from A1). Hulk smash didn’t work for me, though Hulk “take the stairs” and Stark’s minor cardiac dysrhythmia corrected by Thor’s hammer were funny. Also Cap’s “I found Loki” was priceless. So I guess you have to absorb the disagreeable montages of time alterations to enjoy the good, like Banner and the Sorcerer Supreme, Howard and “Howard.”

Honorable mention #2: This movie did a hell of a job at all the couple / BroTP splitting, WTH! Steve and Sharon never stood a chance, Wanda and Vision, Banner and Natasha, Steve and Bucky, Steve and Sam, Thor and Loki, Gamora and Quill. Dammit, I hope Phase 4 at least patches up a few holes in these ships before sending in the speculated new ensemble of comics characters.

In SUMMARY: as my dislikes wane with time and my likes grow in retrospect with each saga part I rewatch, and each time I revisit A4 in theaters, I think that Avengers: Endgame, while not quite my favorite installment, will stick with me forever. What a decade! And my next great joy will be 10…15…20 years from now, when I get to meet a kid, let’s call her Morgan, who’s never seen an MCU film before and vicariously relive that first joy watching it with them. To the end of the line.

I can’t wait.

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na-na-namine · 5 years

Text

Operation: Confirm Amanda’s Love! Ch. 1

Series: Little Witch Academia

Characters: Akko/Amanda, Lotte, Sucy, Hannah, Chariot, Croix

Words: 1,540

Genres: Romance, Comedy

A/N: My super late LWA Secret Santa gift for https://twitter.com/r59k6

I’m sorry this took so long.The holiday season was rough and filled with stress and busywork. I’ll try to get chapter 2 finished as soon as I’m able, but this writer’s block isn’t making things easy.

Regardless, Happy New Year and I hope you enjoy this ^^;

————

Twas the day before Christmas, when all through Luna Nova,

Not a single witch was shopping, not even a for cola.

The candles were lit down the hallways since noon,

In hopes of presents that would arrive soon.

The witches were busy with handmade gifts,

As per tradition of the Academy's scripts.

And Akko in her coat and a red Santa hat,

Is dashing down the halls with a skip in her...

...uh, boots. That look like a... hat...

Yeah.

"Lotte! Sucy! Merry Christmas!"

Akko barges into their living quarters, startling both of her roommates. The sing-songy girl is carrying an armful of holiday-themed gift bags. Lotte places her book down to return the greeting.

"Merry Christmas to you too, Akko!"

"Pasko na naman, puta," Sucy mutters wearily in Tagalog.

"Sucy! Language."

"It's Christmas again, bi-"

Before Sucy could finish, Akko shoves a bag into her hands and then Lotte's.

"Aw, c'mon Sucy! It's the season of giving! How's about you not be a humbug for once?"

"No."

While the poison witch inspects the gift incredulously, Lotte opens her own. Inside were a bunch of sugar cookies, sprinkled with what appeared to be red and green stars.

"Wow! Akko, did you make these yourself?"

"Yep! Those baking lessons with Diana really paid off, huh?"

"I'll say," Lotte beams as she plops a cookie into her mouth. A delightful squeal escapes her lips as she savours the flavour. "Oh-my-stars, these are so~ good!"

"Eh. Six-outta-ten, too much milk," Sucy mumbles between bites.

Akko shoots her a dubious look.

"I should fill yours with raw plums next time."

Sucy's only response was a beleaguered shrug. Lotte shakes her head before smiling back to the brunette.

"Thank you so much, Akko! I wish I could give you your present now, but it's not done yet..."

"Ah, don't sweat it, Lotte. I still gotta deliver the rest of these, so you've got plenty of time to finish up!"

Lotte quickly looks over the gift bags in Akko's arms, noticing that someone was off.

"Where is Amanda's?"

Akko perks up from hearing her girlfriend's name.

"Oh, that? I'm not giving it to her yet."

Lotte and Sucy both share a confused glance.

"...Did you two break up again?" questions the latter.

"What? No!" Akko puffs out her cheeks in offense. "And what do you mean 'again'?"

"I'm just sayin- mmph!"

Lotte stuffs a half-eaten cookie into Sucy's mouth before jumping in.

"Did something happen between you two?"

Akko shakes her head before a massive grin stretches across her face.

"Nope! I'm just going to wait until Amanda gives me her present first."

"Um, why's that?"

"It's all part of 'Operation Confirm Amanda's Love on Christmas'!"

Lotte, at a clear loss of words, turns to her other roommate. Still chewing on Lotte's cookie, Sucy merely shrugs her shoulders.

"And, that is...?"

"It's self-explanatory," Akko answers with a fist-pump.

Sucy rolls her eyes. "Riiiiight..."

"Look, I friggin' love Amanda, almost as much as I love you guys! But she can be a bit of a jerk sometimes, y'know?"

"Understatement of the century- mmrph?!"

Lotte cuts off Sucy again with another cookie, her attention not leaving Akko.

"So this time," Akko continues, "I want her to be the one to find me first! That way I can be like, 'Wow, she really does loves me!' and stuff!"

Lotte shuffles on her chair anxiously. "I dunno about this, Akko. That seems like an unhealthy expectation. I mean, what if she's too busy or something?"

"Busy with what? Hitting on other girls?" Akko pouts. "Nah, it'll be fine! She'll pull through, you'll see!"

Sucy, having swallowed the cookies at last, rebuttals with deadpan disbelief.

"Or the two of you of break up agaaaaaannd she's gone."

Both she and Lotte looks on as their roommate dashes off, most likely to deliver the rest of her cookies.

"Gosh, I hope she's right," Lotte mutters with worry.

"Hrm. Knowing Amanda, there's no way she prepared anything."

Sucy gets up from her bed to walk over to Lotte's side. Her toothy grin makes the latter slightly uncomfortable.

"Um, Sucy...?"

"Anyway, I'll be getting my payback now for those cookies earlier."

Sucy wastes no time pinning the now flustered girl onto Akko's bed.

"H-huh? Wait, here? N-now?"

"Consider this your early Christmas gift."

"S-Sucy, maybe we can talk this over- mmph!"

Any objections Lotte might've had are smothered out by Sucy's lips on her own.

Amanda, being the self-proclaimed Ladies' Woman that she is, naturally expects a few girls to shower her with gifts. Tis' the season of giving and all that junk, she'd think. So if she isn't already surprised by that not happening, right now the fiery witch is receiving a gift from the last person she'd ever expect.

"The heck? Hannah England?"

The ginger witch in question has her hands extended out with a quaint present, wrapped neatly in a box. Her expression is cheerful, in contrast to her sarcastic demeanor.

"Here. For you."

Amanda begrudgingly accepts the gift, although she takes a moment to inspect it.

"You didn't rig this thing, did ya?"

Hannah's expression sours. "Merry Christmas to you too, jerkwad."

"Ha! Seeing your frowny face is enough reassurance," Amanda snarks as she tosses the gift up and down. Turning her back, she flicks her fingers in goodbye. "Smell ya later, carrot-head!"

However, she barely manages to strut three steps before Hannah speaks up again.

"You didn't prepare anything for Akko, did you?"

Amanda immediately halts in her tracks, turning her head to meet her accuser's gaze.

"Huh? Of course not."

Hannah stares and blinks vapidly for a few moments, before her lips curl into a sly smirk.

"Ooohhh~?" she hums. "I see, I see. Poor Akko..."

"Wait, what?"

"Knowing that girl, she'll be so sad that you didn't make her anything."

Amanda clicks her tongue in irritation. "Why am I the one who has to get her something?"

"You..." Hannah trails off, her eyes now glaring daggers into Amanda's soul. "...You really don't get it, do you?"

"Hmph," Amanda crosses her arms and prepares to walk away. "I don't wanna hear that from you."

"Then you'll hear it from Professor Ursula," Hannah remarks bitterly. It gets the reaction she expected, with Amanda stiffening in apparent fear.

Finally, she thinks to herself. Time to twist the knife.

"I can see it now! Akko running in tears to her precious Professor," the ginger exclaims in overdramatized acting.

"Now wait just a seco-!"

"Oh, poor Akko," Hannah says in her best Ursula impression. "Was it her? Was it Amanda that made you cry?"

Unfortunately for Amanda, those very words paint an image of a furious Shiny Chariot in her head. The same Chariot she once saw punch a massive dragon with her bare hands. These thoughts send a shiver down her spine.

"Who knows what'll happen if you piss off the professor like that," Hannah sneers, "and it'll only be a matter of time before everyone else finds out."

Against her better judgement, Amanda allows Hannah's words to sink in.

Ugh, this is why Christmas sucks. But, Akko might really be waiting for me, so...

...

...Dammit!

"I can probably stop by the town square or something..."

Hannah shakes her head. "Handmade gifts only, remember?"

"Shit, stupid rules." Amanda pulls out her wand with a new idea. "Maybe I can-"

"You sure it's a good idea to cut corners like that?"

Amanda bites her lip, the frustration of wracking her brain getting to her. Then what the hell is magic good for?

Hannah can't help but sigh pitifully. "Something like cookies would work, right? Akko's were really good, y'know?"

All of a sudden, Amanda perks up. "Cookies?"

Wait, wasn't it Diana who taught Akko how to bake?

With a new plan in mind, Amanda sets off past Hannah for real this time.

"Good luck!" Hannah cheers in near-feigned enthusiasm. "Better hope you're not too late, hun."

"Achoo!"

Chariot sneezes into her elbow, making sure not to sully the cookies she just received from Akko.

"Wow, that was quite the blast, Chariot," chuckles a voice off to the side.

"It's 'bless you', Croix."

Said ex-professor pays the advice no heed, simply content in enjoying her own Akko-made cookies.

"I gotta say," Croix speaks through bites, "these cookies aren't half bad."

Chariot nods. "Right? Also, don't talk with your mouth ful-"

"But do you know what's better?"

"Croix, no."

Reaching behind her, Croix grabs an unopened cup of instant ramen and presents it Chariot with a grin.

"Cookie ramen."

Chariot frowns disapprovingly.

"Croix, please."

The older woman merely shrugs as she leaves her seat, most likely to fetch some hot water for her ramen. Chariot rolls her eyes, her attention now on the sunset beyond the windowsill.

"I'm still worried about Akko and Ms. O'Neill's relationship..."

"Oh, those two?" Croix remarks across the room. "I'm surprised they're still together after their third breakup."

"Third?"

"I've had my broombas keep tabs. Say, where do you keep the eggnog?"

The only response she got is a thrown book to her skull.

"Ow!"

"You're a terrible person, you know that?" Chariot deadpans.

"Sheesh," Croix groans while rubbing her head. "No eggnog for you, then."

---

To be continued...

#little witch academia #lwa #lwasanta #g #gift #amandakko #christmas #fanfic #fanfiction

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jinships-ideas · 6 years

Text

BTS Run 39 - The Jin Harem

We get another rendition of MC JIN!!!

This man can do so much!

Let’s Begin!

So we start off with Jinkook standing unnecessarily close.

Great start!

Also, UNIFORM BANGTAN!!!

(To everyone who has a uniform fetish, bless our souls)

Going unnecessarily close to Jin, Candidate Number 2: Joon

He had plenty of space to avoid the close proximity with our beloved MC but Nooooooooooo

Of course, he chooses to go as near as possible

Their heads are almost if not, touching!

Somebody was being waaaay too active to perhaps garner some attention?

From who?

WHY, OF COURSE FROM OUR FINEASS MC!

Look at Hobi looking in Jin’s direction to see if he saw his awesome moves!

Our sunny Hobi just wants to be looked at and praised by the multi-talented Jinnie~

Guys. It’s a HUGE SET.

THere is NO NEED to be sticking so damn close.

(there definitely is ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) )

hmmm?

Why is Joon looking at Jin when everyone was focused on Tae who was speaking?

???

Is he adjusting his collar?

Is this some sort of mating ritual/ courting ritual in the world that I know nothing about?

That’s definitely a flirty thing, right?

Adjusting your clothes/collar (to be specific) while looking at your person of interest??

Or was he hoping Jin would help him adjust his attire like Jin has done on multiple occasions???

Again. PLENTY OF SPACE

BUT they stick themselves arm to arm

(ANd no Yoongi was standing further back so there was ample space beside Joon)

Joonie... there’s so much space so...

Also... You hand...

I wonder if he managed to touch the Jinbooty...

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Joon: YOU ARE MY MAN! LOOK AT HIM TRYING TO STEAL MY MAN! THIS BLASPHEMY! Jin: Did you say FREE?!!! Jk: INTERNATIONAL PLAYBOY IS I, GIVING COMPUTERS AWAY IS MY GAME. Get on my level losers.

Joonie SERIOUSLY, at first you were subtle and now you are just grabbing jin in broad daylight/camera view

Jin doesn’t even react to it...

Does that mean it happens regularly?

Also, look how smug Jk looks with Jin fawning over him...

Money makes the world go round, Giving a desktop away makes Jin comes to you

A mighty fine trade as Jin practically is worth the universe

A split second moment where Jin reaches out for Jk!

Jin really wants that prize huh?

But... is it really the computer he wants?

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

JINKOOK HAND HOLDING

They are NOT toning down their touchiness at all

This looks like Jin declaring his love for Jk disregarding the disapproval of his members

Joon: Really? In front of my salad? Chim:*scoffs* so this is what betrayal is Jk: Money can get you bitches but a computer can get you the universe Jin: Free = Yes

Once again, Jin is more interested in other people’s teams than his own

He is almost ALWAYS the LAST to open his team allocations and he always looks at others’ before his own

And look! Tae is once again looking in the general direction of Jin...

They are really not subtle about wanting to be on the same team

YOU KNOW THE KIM FAM IS BACK!

(if you got the reference feel free to leave a comment~)

Look how happy the Kim Fam are to be on the same team again!!!

You can’t see me but I’M SO FCKING HAPPY

Top 10 anime betrayals

Taejin happening in front of Joon’s eyes

Joon: What is this bullshit betrayal?

Jin shoving Joon away because he isn’t part of his and Tae’s Kim family tree

BUT LOOK HOW SMITTEN JOONIE IS!!!

Jin: yea back off, it’s time for Taejin Joon: *only focused on Jin touching his chest* good thing I worked out just now when I got my ass up from the floor from falling at his beauty Tae: Hi, thy name is your future husband

(ok if anyone’s curious, even though they are all ‘Kim’s, there are many different families/lineage of that surname. Some families are of a higher status/hierarchy and it’s a massive cultural aspect of South Korea.

So from what occurs in the episode, Tae and Jin seem to be part of the same family tree when it comes to their surnames <or their lineage are affiliated> which makes them ‘allies/family’. But Joon is not of the lineage they mentioned which is why he looked at them awkwardly while remaining quiet and Jin jokingly shoved him away.)

Yoonjin taking mirroring to new heights

(that may or may not be a jab at Yoongi)

FIGHT ME

(ง •̀_•́)ง

They are kind of polar opposites... the shoes, the blazer, the hair...

And you know how they say opposite attracts?

Jin trying to flatter MC jk

(the captions actually read Ohgu ohgu <오구오구> which is the sound made to appease/praise babies)

:’)

Being unnecessarily close to Jin Candidate 3: Tae

Of course Tae will take his chance WHEN he can

He is rarely on Jin’s team after all

LET TAEJIN BE A PAIR ON BTS RUN!!!

Mirror mirror on the-

Wait that isn’t a mirror!

It’s a pair of handsome men!

Look at Jinnie acting all shy when Joonie suggested leaving the MC-ing to Jin~

He looks grateful too

:’)

Joonie trusts in Jin’s abilities

Namjin is once again out for my heart

:’)

After Jin becomes the MC (again) Joon immediately suggests maintaining eye contact with the MC...

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

If that ain’t an ulterior motive...

Joon: I’m such a genius! Tae: Gazing into Jin-hyung’s eyes... *too lost in thought* JK: You sly dirt- wait... that means I get to stare at Jin-hyung too! Chim: *tsk tsk* I see right through you, you sly dog Yoongs: Oh... that’s actually a smart idea since hyung will only be looking at me when I look at him Hobi: Nice one fellow 94-liner!

JK is so smitten

Jk.. chill... All Jin did was say some words

You are way too obvious

Tae being unhappy because Jin is looking at Joon while talking and not at him

OR Tae could be practicing his gaze for his eye contact time with Jinnie~

(Side Note: MC Jin tends to always look towards Kim Team (-Jin +Jk) I assume it’s his habit but DAMN he turns to that side a lot)

Jin’s first target is Tae!!!

Tae must be so damn proud that he was the first person Jin turned to

And then there’s Jk admiringly staring at MC Jin who is so damn talented and entertaining

THE ONLY WAY TO LOOK AT JIN IS WITH THE GAZE OF AWE

with 0 hesitations, Tae declares he LIKES THE MC and that THE MC IS VERY HANDSOME

Look at Jin fake being surprised when Tae brings up how Handsome Jin is!

Honey, we know, you know, and you know we know and we know you know that you are a fineass good looking fellow.

BUT Tae’s immediate reply, which means it’s his initial thought and is 100% truthful

Jin: Why are you suddenly saying I’m good looking? Tae: It just came out? What Tae means: BECAUSE YOU ARE???

Ain’t that the truth!

Joon: What sort of cheesy ass shit did I just witness? *fingers curling from the flirtation of Taejin Tae: This man is handsome and he is mine. He will also side with me. Just watch Jin: Either ways, I got called good looking by another good looking man so I’m happy where I am

Top 10 anime betrayals pt.2

Joon: Someone stop their flirting right now or I will end them

Tae: How ridiculous! You can’t oust me from the game for saying the truth about how handsome you are!

Jin: I diddly darn well can! You’re OUT! thanks though, you are good looking too

Joon: really? In front of my salad? Taejin: *Giggling happily* Jk: I love romance

Jin: *already on his next target* Tae: I wonder if I wasn’t flirtatious or forward enough...

Joonie: *gotta be my best to charm him* JK: Wow. This hyung is incredible. Tae: The betrayal... Jin: TELL ME I’M GOOD LOOKING!!

Joon: Your wish is my command

This right here is a whipped man

Yoongs and Hobi looking expectantly but Jin went for Chim!

Chim is so flustered he immediately loses the game XD

Next target: Yoongs!

Is Chim perhaps a yoonjin shipper??

Jin called Tae and Joonie ‘V-ssi’ and ‘RM-ssi’ but when it came to yoongi, he didn’t use ‘Suga-ssi’!

He called him Yoongi-ssi!!!

Yoongi got so flustered!

His tone implied he was really taken aback by the flow of events

:’)

Result: Loses Immediately!

Hobi loses the game too BUT he managed to make Jin laugh so much

Who’s the real winner?

Kim Fam (-Jin +jk) Wins!

Joonie is the real winner though!

He got Jin to lightly hit his chest!

Lucky Joon!

Jin requesting the other team to Line up so he can hit them with the hammer

(He definitely only remembered because the hammer made a squeak as he was laughing and hitting himself with it)

Joonie and Tae taking the chance to shake MC Jin’s hand

They take any skinship moments they can have with Worldwide Handsome-nim

Jk lightly punching Jin to get his attention and to say ‘good job’

If you listen closely, you can even hear Jk saying ‘Ah Jae’<아재> as he punches Jin

Jin really looks to his right side a lot

Jk is the ONLY one to pay attention to Jin and answer him

Obedient Makane

DAMN HOBI! This is a game.

WHY DOES IT LOOK LIKE HE IS SERANADING/PROPOSING TO JIN?!!

Jk... not you too...

It’s a game...

NOT A LOVE DECLARATION SEGMENT

Tae: You can’t do this to me the 2nd time hyung!!!

Hobi tries to win the favour of Jinnie once again by seranading him

BUT Jin awards the point to Tae!

This whole episode is just ‘Flirt With Jin As Much As Possible’ huh?

LOVE IT

Hobi reaching out to try to get what he wants

Too bad his object of affection is focused on the other team, AGAIN

Hobi, reach out a little more and you can get that booty!

The way the Kim Fam (-Jin +Jk) looks at MC Jin when they guess

:’)

Endearingly adorable

Tae wanted a high-5 from MC Jin but sadly the MC was too focused on dancing to reciprocate

Thank god Nochu Came Through!!!

Nochu saved Tae from Joonie’s fate

When Jin Awarded 5 Bonus recreational points for Yoong’s Dance

LMAO this boy needs to chill

Chim and Hobi wants Jinnie’s praises too~

Look how smug the 5 recreational points holder is!

Yoongs: Don’t you know? The way to Hyung’s heart is to be funny.

The way they look at MC Jin and sing the number song~

(The song was basically Jin’s excuse of wanting them to flirt with him)

(Yoongs line consisted of him saying ‘I love you’)

at this point I must say, Yoongi is bad with eye contact with Jin... he’s been avoiding MC Jin’s eye contact whenever possible

he does NOT avoid eye contact with the rest

I wonder what’s up with Yoonjin...

Chim is so done with Hobi’s blatant seduction tactics

Too bad Jin was busy with his script

Jin gyrating his hips as he maintains eye contact with Tae

OK JIN NOT SUBTLE AT ALL

Also, TAE YOU LUCKY CHAP!

Jk enjoying and pointing at Jin’s mating ritual

Joonie judging Jin because the dance wasn’t directed at him, a fellow Wing

This time Jin’s gyrating hips target is Yoongs!

DAMN YOU YOONGS!! KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE PRIZE

STOP AVOIDING EYE CONTACT WITH MC JIN YOU SHY BUB

really? Jin is shaking his junk IN YOUR FACE and you are looking away to argue over a stupid game?

ಠ_ಠ

you might have won this round but you sooooo lost

Look at the way Joonie looks at Jin all fondly despite Jin teasing him throughout the entire ‘MC’s nonsense quiz’ round

HE IS SO DAMN FOND

also, JIN YOU MAJOR TEASE

OMG DID HE JUST?!!

<아이 러브 우유>?!!!

(It actually is a mix of eng and kor = I love milk BUT there has been dramas/shows where people used this line to confess their love...)

A-I LUBEU OYOO

I LOVE YOU

KIM NAMJOON YOU AMAZING MAN

Look how impressed Chim was at Joon’s shocking sudden confession!!!

Joonie himself was shocked at what slipped out

Jin seemed to love it too!!!

NAMJIN LIVES!!!!

Jin wasn’t even surprised when Joonie got on his knees...

Does Joon habitually go on his knees?

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

STOP TEASING THE KIMs JIN!

ISTG the whole nonsense quiz segment involved Jin teasing the Kims

This was probably one of the only times Yoongi made DIRECT EYE CONTACT with Jin...

and he is even covering up his face...

WHY DOES HE NOT WANT TO MAKE FULL ON FACE TO FACE DIRECT EYE CONTACT WITH JIN??

WHY YOU SO SHY HUH??

Also, I’m pointing out how Hobi looks appalled at Yoongi, looking at Jin

Hobi: Quit your act you fool

Jin giving hints out to Yoongi :’)

*MC’s neutrality flying out the window*

Yoongi whines about not being able to get the answers

Jin IMMEDIATELY suggests seat changes

YOU SO WHIPPED LIKE CREAM

Hobi: Your pitiful act is a NO NO

Cutie so shocked at the question Jin gives him when the rest all got easy AF ones

Jin you fcking tease

Tae: Really? You’re going to do this to me? After all the Love?

WOW! Yoonjin eye contact!

SUCH RARENEsS

Jin giving the English hint to Joonie

Of course, he gives the English hint to Joonie!

Fact: Joon didn’t even know the answer he just said ‘oil’ because he trusted Jin’s hint

*MC’s unbiasedness flying out the door*

Tae: Isn’t he just AMAJIN? Jk: You are a JINius Joon: My man is so leJINdary

CHIM CHECKING OUT THAT JINBOOTY

You thought you were slick

TOO BAD MY EYES ARE MADE FOR SUCH SUBTLE MOMENTS

ONLY JIN NOTICED TAE’s Mistake

MC Jin paying extra attention to a fellow Kim huh?

TAEJIN CUTIES

I really like how Tae angles his head, ready for the hit

It’s cute

He’s cute

:’)

Give Jin a squeaky hammer, say stupid shit, and he WILL hit you

Hit you out of affection of course

Chim doing the whole gentlemanly gesture with that tiny hand of his

He looks like a prince escorting his partner

GENTLEMAN CHIM ft.smol hand

STILL NO EYE CONTACT

Hobi turning his extra to a 100 once Jin is playing for his team

Someone wants to look good~

Jin: Let me introduce to you my- Chim: MAN. *thumbs up* I’m his man!! :D

Jin’s hand not leaving Chim through his little fit at Joonie

He’s got his hand on him

Chim still has his thumbs up

Hobi also does the head angle for Jin to hit him

He looks way too happy to be getting punished though

who wouldn’t if its Jin punishing them?

Jk taking the opportunity to place his hand on MC Jin’s godly waist

we see all JK

Joonie patiently repeating the team action to Jinnie is so damn soft?

It’s so sweet?

Namjin is goals??

Ft. Jin’s unique fingers

The anticipation they have for Jin!

They look so expectant!

Ft. Jin in a cuteass pose with his legs and just being the cutest ever

Proceeds to make the same mistake he laughed at JK for just now

It’s ok Jinnie, you still look incredibly good despite making that mistake

Seok Jin 3? YES PLEASE

1 to watch, 1 to keep, 1 to learn dad jokes from

and ALL to LOVE AND PROTECT

Jk shoving Jin away (or is he just using that as an excuse to do more touching?)

Love triangle between the Kims

The way they look at Jin

JK represents all of us out here

The look of awe is how people look at Jin 24/7

Tae: Really? You’re flirting in front of me with another man? In front of my salad?

Pretty sure Hobi forgot about the game and just went full-mode flirtatious with MC Jin

Their faces when Jin was playing round 1 of Dibidibidip

PURE JOY

??????

Well, as long as they are all happy I Guess???

2SEOK MOMENT!!!

HUGs HUGS HUGS

Chim and Hobi flocking to Jin to put their hands all over him

Hobi with the hugs, shoulder and neck touches

Chim goes for the arm and back

Sharing is caring

HOLD HIS HANDS DAMN IT

HE WANTS YOU TO HOLD HIS HANDS

JIN HAS 2 HANDS, THERE ARE 3 OF YOU

WHY AREN’T YOU GUYS BATTLE ROYALE-ing THIS OUT??

Kim Fam (+Jk) being happy while twirling around holding hands

Chim: I don’t want to see that. I would have done so much more Yoongs: *hmph* That should be me holding your hand Hobi: That looks fun! I want to join!

The lucky person who receives Jin’s gaze is Joonie!!

Lucky fella

‘Do you see my drawing?’ More like ‘Do you see my everything?’ Because EVERYONE STOPS AND STARES FOR A WHILE WHEN JIN IS THERE

Can I just say, JIN DID SUCH A MARVELOUS JOB BEING THE MC!

He made the mundane games so much better and his skills are no joke at all! Well done MC-nim! You deserve all the praises!!!

Hope you guys enjoyed!

Until Next Time~

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baconpal · 6 years

Note

Whats your opinion on the Monogatri series?

fuck man, i was gonna draw tonight, you cant just give me an ask that i could write for hours about

idk how long thisll get but just in case, usual read more time but tl;dr very very good series, absolutely recommend to any seasoned weebs out there

I fucking love the monogatari series for so many reasons. i’ll just shit out bullet points of cool shit

1. gigantic but segmented: it’s one of the longest animes i’ve watched, but if someone wanted to just watch some i’d just tellem “hey just watch bakemono and stop there for now” and they’d still watch some great content and be mostly satisfied as everything wraps up well and doesn’t have any kinda sequel bait or cliff hanger. You can watch as much as you want when you want, even down to the various arcs, even out of order if need be, so it’s incredibly convenient, which means a lot to me (i say as i marathon HxH and Ippo)

2. Fuck the Order: there’s about 3 main orders that people like to preech, novel order (the order the arcs were released according to the light novels), anime release order, and chronological order since the story isn’t told chronologically in either case, and that can get confusing on top of none of the arcs being numbered outside of bakemono and bakemono 2 (which almost nobody recommends you actually watch consecutively) BUT the part I love is ANY order works and is interesting in its own way, the order that events are presented to you can change the impact of various scenes and events, like the ending to koimono is a lot more terrifying if you have no clue that kaiki is a healthy happy boy a year later, and owari becomes a bit more confounding if you know ougi is also doing fine (even if a bit boyish), and when you watch kizumono can drastically change how you feel about araragi and shinobu’s relationship, like when they were super duper tense in nise i always felt kinda whatever, but now that i’ve seen kizu its kinda like “fuck man how arent either of you dead already”

Basically its cool as shit since everything is written without regard for order

3.Character Development (and lack there of): All the characters in the series develop pretty well, and sometimes experience multiple large character shifts that improve them from the absolute pieces of garbage they are in bake (lookin at you Hanekawa, though you were pretty alright in kizu) Senjougahara is also worth note as she’s the primary girl and is thus around a lot despite having very few arcs centered on herself

but one of the most powerful parts of all the characters is they all also never change their true worst traits, and those who don’t really are my favorite characters, and those would be Senjougahara, Hachikuji, and the main man himself, Araragi. Senjou never really is able to drop the autistic girl sitting on the fourth wall deep down within her, Hachikuji continues to constantly fill roles and play parts that don’t belong to her, up through the very end of the series where she becomes a fucking GOD for NO good reason but FUCK it i love you hachikuji, and lastly Araragi, one of the best protaganists ever, who matures quite a lot over the course of his life and all, but from the begining of kizu to the end of owari, he is just completely incapable of letting someone pathetic go without help, even if it means completely sacrificing himself and I love my stupid boy so much

4. Who’s the protag anyway?: So araragi is the protag, duh, but not all the time, and the differences in how the show works when it changes is always very interesting, as it reveals a lot about both araragi and the characters who take his role; namely, Hanekawa, Nadeko, and my fucking BOY Kaiki. Hanekawa interacts with the story much closer to a novel (to the point of analyzing chapters and such), Nadeko sees everyone around her as bubbly colorful nobodies, and Kaiki sees everyone as normal fucking people which is only strange and jarring because when Araragi is the protagonist, anyone who is unimportant to him literally does not exist or physically manifest on screen. Some would call it a lazy choice, and maybe it is, this is shaft, it wasnt the first time they did it and it wasn’t the last either (side note; i like mekakucity actors fight me pussy) but even moments full of “background characters” like Araragis freshmen highschool dilemma, everyone in class other than the 2 cute girls he knows are just depicted as names and random photographic images of shit and its very telling of his character despite never being directly said in the novels or script.

5. FUck man this shit looks good: Art is important shit dude, and monogatari consistently looks good, even if the backgrounds can be incredibly simple at times, they are STYLISH and effective and thats all they need to be, and despite being a show mainly about people talking, the characters will move and be in as many weird cool perspective shots as they need to in order to fill out a scene. Whenever the show ISNT just people talkin, the animation does not slack off. The few fights of the main series are absolutely to my taste, I love Araragi V rainy devil, and thats pretty much the only straight up fight in the show, but the Kizu movies are 3 hours of pure kino holy shit, even araragi buying some porn to beat he meat is animated excessively well and with cartoon abandon.

I know that stylish substance is still just a shaft thing, but it’s always on point in monogatari, also NO CG CHARACTERS outside of a few random shots in Kizu, which is a definitely worth pointing out considering mekakucity’s original television run exists.

6. FUck man this shit sounds good: The voice acting is impeccable, I love everyones voice so much, but the music is also of very high quality, and guess what it does that thing that i always fucking mention cus it’s awesome and should be used whenever possible anywhere: Motifing. Every character has a theme in some way due to every major character having atleast 1 opening centered on them (there’s an OP for every fucking arc and its insane they’re all fully animated too its bonkers) and theres usually a couple remixes of each persons theme used at some point, especially as like, bittersweet slow classical songs at the climax of an arc being a remix of the OP for that arc.

Kizu is also noteworthy for motifing the EDs into the other songs, remaking songs from the anime for specific classic interactions (looking at you, sharp and friend or foe) as well as just being super interesting in its use of vocal accompaniment, like the shoowap-doowap kind of stuff they throw in is very fun.

7.FUck man this shit IS good: I said early that the show is mostly just people talking, but fuck man i love listening to these people talk to each other. Everything they talk about is super entertaining and full of multiple meanings and just so much to take in that any amount of rewatching will always have me finding more to love, but since its a weeb show with references and puns and stuff, I would recommend making sure you’re atleast a decently powerful weeb who can at least UNDERSTAND some Japanese and knows a bit about anime before getting into it, also make sure you can read decently fast. It’s not Tatami Galaxy levels but stuff can move quick. (bit far into a post like this to make a recommendation but hey)

oh no i wrote for an hour about this shit bless the poor souls of any mobile users who still follow me

#long ass post #Anonymous

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yabashiri · 7 years

Text

V3 Character Memes Part 1

Kaede Akamatsu

general opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine I guess | like them! | love them | actual love of my life hotness level: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoretically hot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would bang hogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuff What, isn’t that obvious? She’s as typical Gryffindor as you get, as far as I know. best quality: Being a protag with some balls for a change? Committing a murder for the greater good? Having lost faith in humanity (just like me after Ch.1)? She’s practically perfect, save for that one plot point, which is not het fault at all. Bless your soul, Kaede, you made me love and hate DR again. worst quality: Hangs out with Shuichi instead of Maki/Iruma/Ouma/practically anyone else. ship them with: Maki, Tsumugi, Iruma (yesssss), Junko (I ship anyone with her), any DR girl brotp them with: Ouma, Ibuki, Nanami needs to stay away from: Saihara, Saimatsu fics, Kodaka, DR plot misc. thoughts: The reason I’ve wanted to play ndrv3 so much and the reason I’ve almost dropped it. The only character (save for Ouma and maybe Maki) who didn’t get worse after several chapters, the reason maybe being she fucking died. Her pre-v3 self is even better, she’s my new all time favorite excluding Junko. If Junko’s despair, Nanami’s uuuuuuugh hope I guess (though DR’s representation of Nanami is horrible), then Kaede is everything in between. Rantarou Amami

Kokichi Ouma

general opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine I guess | like them! | love them | actual love of my life hotness level: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoretically hot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would bang hogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuff Ravenclaw is a solid second choice, but look at him, he’s as much a typical Slytherin as Kaede is a typical Gryffindor! best quality: Somehow manages to be a better version of Komaeda than our garbage boy himself. He entertains me as a player, does more to a plot than anyone else ever and always stays in character. worst quality: Chapter 5, period. Writing a 300 page script while dying from being shot two times AND getting poisoned? Fucking what? ship them with: Junko (mayyyyyybe), but he’s not a shippable character for me brotp them with: Kaede, Gonta, Komaeda, Togami, Kuzuryuu, Gundam needs to stay away from: Kaito and Kodaka. Also from Komaeda, obviously. And anyone whose name begins with ‘K’ I guess. misc. thoughts: Didn’t like him at first, but oooooh boy. When Kaede left this world he was the only one to save me. The only character who tried to make this game at least barely interesting, always staying as optimistic as Kaede (!), being cynical and smart, someone to relate to. I don’t even want to know what fandom makes of him, another Komaeda I guess? But for me he is a small, tiny male Junko, though not as smart and despairing as her. One of the best DR characters, at least one of the most interesting to look at. He is not only Komaeda, but also Gundam of v3.

Shuichi Saihara

general opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine I guess | like them! | love them | actual love of my life hotness level: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoretically hot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would bang hogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuff This is a tough one. He’s not brave nor cunning, but he’s smart, though he doesn’t seem very ravenclawish... that leaves us with hufflepuff and I guess he is loyal, so. best quality: Megumi Hayashibara as his VA, also loved his design and loving it now. He is kinda relatable. worst quality: Tries to replace Kaede and fails miserably. He’s a coward, bland and uninteresting. ship them with: I don’t want to imagine that brotp them with: Hinata, he could teach him a thing or two about being simple but interesting needs to stay away from: Kaede, Maki and Kaito and v3 cast in general. But especially Kaede. misc. thoughts: I thought I’d love him for his design, talent and VA but... geez. To be frank, he does have a development, though I hate the way it happens. He acts kinda cool in later chapters, finding truth even when others tell him to stfu and vote, I’ll give him credit for it. People hate him for protag switch and while I don’t exactly give enough fucks to hate him, I don’t like him. As a character he’s not bad. As a protagonist he’s a shitty mess. I can’t really tell how I feel about him; at times he seems okay, but then I think about everything Kaede could be and he wasn’t, and it fills me with rage. If he was a character in the first installment, he could pass, but in v3 where they fucking compare him to Kaede? No, thank you.

#ask memes #v3 #new danganronpa v3 #ndrv3 #kaede akamatsu #amami rantarou #ouma kokichi #shuichi saihara

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nomanonold · 7 years

Text

#Chihoko

I woke up still sort of hungover to this BLAST of texts from my collaborator friend telling me about HO-LY-SHIT everything that had happened in the fandom over night. But mostly, Sin wanted to write the story, because once you hear it, you HAVE to write it, right?

So here you go: our take on #Chihoko

http://archiveofourown.org/works/10762548

Or read here:

No one ever accused Yurio of being a patient, understanding friend, but this morning, no one could blame him for his outrage.

The two men he looked up to most in the world, he was literally looking up to right now, as the fucking idiots sat naked on the roof of a castle yelling at the sunrise. Since when did the youngest guy in the room end up being the only responsible one?

Since they all started drinking last night, the bastards.

------

They left Ice Castle in a fit of boisterous ego. Every single one of them knew this was going to be the best production they’d ever done. Or, at least, the very most fun. There was so much fanservice and silliness, things they’d never get away with in real competition. It was professional athletes fooling around and seeing what they could really do with their bodies without ISU judgement. The triplets kept a steady slow drip of “accidental” sneak previews feeding the public into a hyper frenzy.

The event was already sold out. Every room in Yu-Topia booked. People were staying in cities two hours away and taking the train back and forth to Hasetsu just for the “Victor and Friends” ice skating exhibition extravaganza.

The hardest part was getting Yakov to agree to let the entire Russian Team come to Japan for this. After that, Phichit, Minami, and Chris were easy to bring on board. And once he had them, it was no problem for Victor to get Seung Gil, Leo, Guang-Hong, Mickey and Sara. Because the entire city was booked, everyone was bunking with Victor, Yuuri and Yuri at Yu-Topia, but quarters were already tight, which necessitated an unfortunate amount of room sharing. In the morning, many bodies were strewn on the floor of Victor’s room, being the largest of the three. Somehow, Yurio managed to keep all the potential bed-sharers out of his closet-turned-bedroom, but he slid the door open in the early morning, thinking he’d get a head start on his preparation, to see chaos.

No one was fully clothed. There were about a dozen people in Victor’s room, on his bed, on his floor, everywhere. Yurio was immediately disgusted by this display. He didn’t even know a few of these people. Everyone was asleep. They needed to be at Ice Castle in a few hours. What the fuck was going on?

Finally, Yuri spotted Yuuri: or what was left of him.

“Katsudon! What the hell hap--..?” but he couldn’t finish his thought.

Yuuri looked worse than the entire room put together. He was ass-up at the foot of Victor’s bed, face a passed-out heap on one of his folded arms. The other arm was splayed at a hard angle. He was drooling and snoring. His back was covered in sharpie marker.

To top it all off, he had a pair of too-small bikini-style men’s underwear on his head, spraying his hair into a million odd angles through the leg holes. Black, of course, and undoubtedly Victor’s.

Speaking of which.

Yuri narrowed his eyes, taking a closer look at the scrambled assortment of human flesh.

“Yuuri!” Yuri woke his rival up the best way he knew how: kicking Yuuri over onto his side and then repeatedly punching Yuuri with his foot.

“Where did you put Victor?!” Yuri exclaimed. For all the bodies in the room, none of them were the star of the upcoming show.

That was a problem.

Yuuri finally woke up, moaning, and blinked at Yuri for all of two seconds before he was leaning off the edge of the bed, grabbing the upturned waste basket by his desk, and hurling into it.

That was the last straw.

Yuri yelled at the entire room to wake up.

“Victor’s not here?” Yuuri finally managed, blinking through the pounding of his head, groaning. He was somewhere between drunk and hungover and didn’t know which was worse.

Everyone else was making similar noises, complaining and bitching and getting groggily to their feet.

“Where the fuck is Victor?!” Yuri repeated. Normally, it took a steel spatula to pry Victor off of Yuuri, and yet now, on the morning of his big event, he was nowhere to be seen? Something was off.

People started looking at their phones, trying to see if they’d heard from Victor, received a text, or if Victor was somewhere Instagramming his heart out as was his routine in the early morning.

No one had heard a peep.

“Maybe YOU did something to him, Yurio!” Georgi accused, in the beginning of a panic.

“What the FUCK would I do to Victor?!”

“You have always wanted to be Russia’s only star, get out from under Victor’s shadow,” Mila declared, her suspicion teetering between legitimate and playful. How the hell had Mila wound up in this room? The girls were supposed to take Yuuri’s room.

“Like I need any help with that, Baba!” Yuri growled.

“Look,” Mickey said, holding up a scribbled napkin that had fallen out of the waste bin when Yuuri grabbed it for other purposes. On the napkin were various poorly-scripted show names: YURI ON DARKNESS, YURI ON GALAXY, YURI ON TIGER, ME VS THE WORLD. “You even want your own show!”

“HEY!” Yurio glowered, disguising his embarrassment as anger. “Those -- That’s --- HALF OF THOSE WERE OTABEK’S IDEAS!”

Sometime during this conversation Chris - who was nowhere to be seen - had tweeted:

“Victor! Where are you?!” with winking smiles, and now everyone’s phones were blowing up. Chris had just informed the rabid, sold-out crowds that Victor was missing.

Minako burst into the room of mostly-still-asleep half-naked men: “Yuko just called! What the hell happened last night!? Where’s Victor????”

That outburst got everyone awake for real, and people who didn’t stand up fast enough for Minako’s tastes got kicked in the ribs or butt.

“Yuri-kun! What is that on your back?!” Minami squealed, pointing with one hand and clutching his gasping mouth with the other.

Minako spun her protege around. “It’s in Russian! It must be from Victor!”

She promptly shoved Yuuri into Yurio. “READ IT! WHAT DOES IT SAY?!?!”

Yurio was suddenly in too-close proximity to Yuuri’s, sweaty, alcohol-smelling, naked flesh. He growled and struggled, but the group overpowered him.

“Please, Yurio?” Yuuri finally begged, bending over and trying to do a ‘flat back’ style yoga pose to ease Yurio’s reading of the text. “We need to know where Victor is. We can’t do ‘Victor and Friends’ without Victor.”

“You know, we could always --” Georgi started, Mila beside him, but Yuri wasn’t one to be shown up.

Yuri looked away, shrugged off his captors and growled: “It says Victor will beat Chihoko. Or… overcome Chihoko.”

Almost simultaneously, nearly everyone in the group uttered some variant of: “Who the fuck is Chihoko?”

Yurio stomped towards his room. “How the heck should I know! IDIOTS! I hate all of you!” and did his best to slam the sliding door before throwing himself onto his bed with a pillow over his head so he couldn’t hear the madness outside. He did his part to help in the search by texting Victor.

The fuck have you gone?

“Oh no. This is terrible,” Yuuri clutched his forehead in the other room and tried to stand, failing, and slumping back against the bed.

Seung Gil looked nervously around the room and was happy the Victor disappearance overshadowed his own… actions… last night. He tried to further deflect attention from himself by announcing:

“Katsuki Yuuri, one thing needs to be said before we go on.”

Yuuri looked up at him with the saddest, most beaten down eyes, hoping for comfort from a younger, kinder friend.

“Put some clothes on!”

This entire time, in front of Minako Sensei and everyone else, including, OH GOD BAKA MINAMI KUN, Katsuki Yuri had been balls and dick hanging out for all the world to see.

Yuuri immediately grabbed the trashcan and threw up again.

“Okay, okay,” Phichit decided to try and save the day. “Everyone’s seen a drunk morning after movie, right?” There was bleary, non-committal nodding in response. “Well, we have to retrace our steps, look for clues! Everyone empty your pockets and try to remember what happened last night!”

“We ate katsudon for dinner.” Georgi pulled out his receipt from downstairs.

“Oh yeah,” Mickey continued to build his case against the Russian Fairy. “Victor said ‘Here’s your katsudon, kitten’ and then Yurio got pissed.”

Mila laughed and mocked with her best Yurio voice: “I am the ICE TIGER!”

Leo shuddered. “That was when things started to get… gross…”

Guang Hong looked at his phone and found a video of Chris. He hit play.

The Swiss star lounged salaciously in the middle of a Victor and Yuuri sandwich. He leaned into Yuuri, purring: “Do you want to... drink my… sake?” The tone made it clear he was talking about anything but sake.

Yuuri feigned pushing him away, leaning Chris into Victor. “It’s OUR sake, Chris.” He corrected. “It belongs to Yu-Topia.”

Leo and Guang Hong could be heard near the phone: “Ugh. Adults are gross.”

The video kept playing to prove the youngsters right. Chris snorted at the pair and turned his weighty gaze on them. “If we’re so adult for you, why don’t you go to your mums, get a nice suckle of milk, and go sleep in your cribs, hmm?” The words alone were bad, but Chris accented them with a slow swirl of his finger around his nipple and a squeeze of his pectoral.

The video ended.

Minako was flush and excused herself to go look for Chris and Victor since they both had to be out in the town somewhere.

“THAT’S IT!” Yurio burst from his bedroom. “Yuuri was jealous of Victor flirting with Chris all night and hid him away!” He pointed a finger of judgment at Yuuri as the Japanese skater pathetically tried to hop into a pair of pants. Phichit, bless his soul, was acting as a human railing for Yuuri to hold on to to stay balanced as he dressed.

“It looked more like Chris was flirting with Yuuri,” Leo offered.

“They were all pretty into each other,” Georgi sighed, enamoured by the love his friends shared. “I don’t think either Victor or Yuuri would be jealous of Chris.” Yuuri buried his face in his hands.

“Oh! Look at this video!” Mila chirped.

A far more sober video began to play, it must have been from much earlier than the Chris milking incident.

Victor and Yuuri were drinking, but slowly, and the video panned to everyone around the room enjoying themselves, fully clothed.

Victor jumped up behind Yuuri and grabbed him around the waist.

“Yuuuuri my cuuuteee piiggyyy!” His fingers began to squeeze Yuuri’s pooch over his shirt. “Your off season soft tummy is sooo squishy!” Then his hands got up under Yuuri’s shirt and exposed his tummy. “I squish it!”

Yuuri squirmed a bit adorably and whined: “Victor!! Everyone’s watching!”

This did absolutely nothing to disincentivize Victor.

“What the heck, Mila?!” Yuuri groaned as the video actually zoomed in on Victor’s hand smooshing a warm circle over Yuuri’s bare and adorably pudgy stomach.

“Poodgy poofy woofy!” Victor laughed and jiggled the flesh.

Mila covered a spit-take style laugh with her hand as the video stopped playing.

“Maybe Katsudon got jealous that everyone saw Victor being cute with him and wanted to keep him to himself!” Yurio tried to shout, but it was drowned out by the combined cacophony of everyone laughing at the video.

“No. This clue doesn’t help.” Phichit scratched his chin and did his best detective voice. “Anything else anyone remembers?”

“Oh! I’ve got one!” Leo cheered. “Oh! This is a good one! I bet this is it!”

The newest video showed Victor flirting with Chris this time. Yuuri had lost an article of clothing or two, but still had his pants on.

“Victor! Stop looking at Chris and look at meeeeeee!”

Victor’s position in the onsen made it possible for him to be facing both Yuuri and Chris at once.

“Yuuri, I AM looking at you!”

“You’re not looking enough.”

Snickering could be heard in the background as drunk-video Yuuri put on a pouty face and reached for Victor. Once he had Victor in his clutches, Yuuri’s Sochi banquet begging voice was suddenly all anyone could hear in the room. At full volume, Katsuki Yuuri wailed:

“Victor! Do it with me!”

Minami-Kun, hearing this from the recording, dropped his phone with a loud thud. His body when rigid and he didn’t even try to retrieve the device.

“Do what?” came the silver tongued reply in the video.

“That thing we do… when we drink… do that… do it with me…”

Yurio covered his ears and his growls were crescendoed to a roar of insolent rage. He knew this was all Yuuri’s fault! No one listened to him!

The video ended.

“That’s right!” Phichit laughed. “You guys came back in here and started playing Yakyuken! Oh, Yuuri-kun, you lost… BAD. You were naked in like ten minutes.”

“KATSUKI SHIT YUURI!” Yurio erupted.

Yuuri had buried his face in the pillow by this point, curled up into a ball and commenced a long, aching, moan. No had had the courage to tell him that Victor’s underwear was still on his head. Finally he admitted in a whine of pain: “It’s true… I want to disappear…”

Georgi raised a delicate finger. “I saw Victor when he left last night! He was naked when he left! And he kept saying something.” His steepled his fingers against his temples as he paced, wracking his brain. “Chin… hoko…?”

Minami went more crimson than he already was. “Uh, is had to be something else, right Georgi? He couldn’t have been repetitively saying…” he blanched, “penises, could he?”

Mila guffawed. “That sounds about right for drunk Victor!”

Yurio screamed. “Chihoko, you ass!” at Georgi. “The same thing that’s written on Yuuri’s stupid sweaty, stinking back!”

“OH!” Phichit suddenly exclaimed. “Chihoko!!!” He’d tagged that on one of his IG pics the previous night: Yuuri and Victor, waist up, though Victor had one of Yuuri’s ankles in his hands and was compressing the Japanese skater into an impressive stretch. “Look!”

“I… I have a video from then…” Minami whispered in horror. His cheeks were bright red, and he couldn’t bring himself to press play. He held out his phone in one hand, the other covering his eyes.

It looked like Minami had been trying to take a video of Yuri and Leo balancing cards, but in the background, sure enough, were Victor and Yuuri, half out of frame but their voices clear:

“Who…. is Chihoko!?” Victor gasped in alarm, dropping Yuuri’s leg. Yuuri twisted around and wrapped his arms around Victor’s neck, slurring:

“Are youuuu maaaaaadddddd,” Yuuri teased, his butt shaking in the video as he pushed Victor back.

“No!” Victor tried to scoff.

“Yess youuu arrrreeeee!”

The pair’s words escalated, but the video cut off abruptly as Yuri and Leo’s card tower fell down.

“My Victor and Yuuri got a divorce!” Phichit shrieked in horror.

Yuuri made another deathly noise from his pillow.

#Chihoko was on several people’s phones, with the question trending online “Who is Chihoko?!” The skaters were all asking one another the same question, now.

That was when Emil walked in, blinked at the sight of everyone, shook his head like clearing a nightmare, and asked: “Why is Victor naked on top of the castle?”

Even Yurio was stunned silent.

“What?” Yuuri finally had to ask.

“Victor… he’s… er….” Emil nodded the way he’d came. “He’s naked. Stretching. On the castle roof.”

“Oh, god.”

Yuuri made a move for the door, and it wasn’t until he was almost out of Yu-Topia that Emil called: “Take that underwear off your head!”

Yuuri would never forgive Phichit for this.

By the time Yuuri reached the castle, panting, out of breath, and quite certain he was still drunk, the sky was light enough that sunrise was imminent.

One story above him, the love of his life was up there stretched into a pose that mimicked one of the nearby statues. It was an impressive sight, cock and all. Before Yuuri could even open his mouth, Victor was shouting:

“IS THIS BETTER THAN CHIHOKO!?”

Yuuri blinked.

“WHO THE HELL IS CHIHOKO!” He held out his hands in exasperation towards his love: “I COULD SEARCH THE WHOLE WORLD; THERE’S NOBODY BETTER THAN YOU!”

And he saw and heard the little shriek of joy this caused in Victor.

By this time, the others had arrived, only a few stragglers still coming up the hill. Chris had run into Emil on the other man’s way to Yu-Topia and had been standing below Victor trying to talk him down for more than thirty minutes. Phichit greeted Chris with a chipper grin:

“Have you been babysitting him this whole time? You missed all the fun this morning.”

Chris smiled and flashed his phone, revealing a photo of Seung Gil laying kisses on a stunned Nishigori: “Oh, Phichit, the day is only just beginning.”

Victor caught everyone’s attention when he hailed from above: “Yuuuuuri! Strip and join mee!!!”

Chris and Phichit laughed, like Victor had made a funny joke, but Yuuri stared pure-hearted determination up at Victor and promptly started removing his shirt and pants all over again.

“Ahhhhh! Yuuri! Amazing!” Victor swooned when Yuuri finally caught up to him, walking carefully along the rooftop. “Am I shining, Yuuri?!”

“Very, very brightly,” Yuuri agreed, the first rays of the sun catching on Victor’s pale skin and making him glow.

“THIS CHIHOKO MAY BE YUURI’S PAST,” Victor called down to the assembled skate group, who had absolutely no idea how to deal with this situation, “BUT I AM YUURI’S NOW!”

Yuuri nuzzled into Victor’s naked body and bare skin.

“Oh good, everyone!” Phichit enthused. “My best friend got remarried!!!”

There was a round of clapping from the assembled skaters as Victor and Yuuri took their seats on the roof, arms hugging waists, watching the sunrise.

“I’M BETTER THAN CHIHOKO!” Victor cried out happily.

“HE’S BETTER THAN THE SUN!” Yuuri joined him, pointing at the half moon of burning light.

“I’M BETTER THAN THE WORLD!!!”

---

“Oh for fuck’s sake,” Yuri growled from the ground.

This was why he shouldn’t let those two around alcohol.

It was officially confirmed for their fans and all of their friends. Victor and Yuuri were a couple of drunk exhibitionists. Next time they called Yurio to be part of their show, he would tell them to fuck off. Fuck right off. There was no way he was getting sucked into this again. The disgusting public affection. The raunchy nudity. The uncontrollable theatrics. Up early enough to see the fucking sunrise!

Yuri huffed, surrounded by his skating family, after one of the most ridiculous nights of his life, and couldn’t entirely hide the way his lip quirked up as he looked at that horizon.

#yoi #yuri on ice #chihoko #victuuri #phichit chulanont #Yuri Plisetsky #ao3 #fanfic

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tanjalc · 7 years

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The day has come where it all finally makes sense. Through the heartache there’s clarity. The road has been walked in the manner it was intended to be walked. There’s clarity in the pain and I know I’ve got this now. I’m listening, I get it and I don’t blame anyone or regret it. Its my path, my lessons and my personal journey only I will understand. Being able to reflect from both view points with unconditional love in my heart regardless of all that has happened is being strong and not playing blame games. This is my journey and mine alone. I entered it alone, I’ll leave it alone, knowing I tried with all my might and finally understood the perpetual fight. The journey has been heart wrenching and I’ll never understand why others do the things they do. Its ok, I don’t have to as I’m unable to get it my mind is different and I can’t expect anything of anyone other than myself. I’m no longer waiting for sorry. As when it finally dawned on me that I kept attracting those in my outer world that reflected my inner world. I looked at the outer not the inner missing the key to my problems. Systematically, I removed all those from the outer that triggered me, were toxic and mirrored my inner world. However, the problem wasn’t solved by doing this. I finally realised those closest to me my core, my inner world they were the ones I needed to remove and set strong boundaries with. Those you love the dearest, your blood, your family can be the ones that will test you the most. By removing them its not out of selfishness or that you don’t love them. I love them all unconditionally. If you don’t do it the pendulum will spin and will keep going around on repeat. With different scenarios, small variations and in an eternal battle of blame and games. I will never get a sorry, I won’t get the response I think is right and I finally don’t expect it or long for it. I can’t make them and as long as I know that I’ve done all I can then I’ll stop beating myself up with trying to fix. My ideal of everyone being harmonious and loving towards one another with unconditional positive regard is a fantasy however it can be a reality in my direct family and this is what I want and this is how cycles are broken this is my job as a parent and I’m not passing it down my lineage. I’ve held this for way to long and allowed it to effect my life through my health and wellbeing, my relationships, my major life choices. I feel things differently as my soul wouldn’t be able to do some of these things. I’m a highly sensitive empathetic soul and I feel bad when the truths are dragged out. I feel like I’ve broken ones trust even though mine was and in anger I’ve blown up and nothing is gained no gratification just more pain. So I forgive relentlessly due to my empathy and wanting it to end I dismiss lies and vindictive behaviour. Some of the most horrid things one could ever imagine having done to them has happened in the last three years. Instead of support I got crucified for being honest and that wasn’t enough. I forgive, I still love. I’m not going to get even, I’m not going to defend myself, I’m walking away as I know the truth and the reality and I’m not going to sacrifice my integrity to expose there’s or try and destroy their lives by taking things that mean the most to them. The things that keep you living the angels that saved my life. Painting pictures that are so distorted they forget what they did or why they even did it. As the things being done were a reflection of their own inner turmoil and a way of protecting their own insecurities through the lies, deceit and guilt they were living and deflecting it at the one who was the weakest and most vulnerable. Instead of supporting, listening, trying to help with empathy, loyalty and love it was complete abandonment and isolation. This hurts like hell but it all finally makes sense and i forgive. Thank fully the penny finally dropped when the missing pieces were finally given. I’ve got dreams and goals to kick and they’re being lit by the most magical path. I no longer will waste my time as I’ve given enough of it and I’m going to shine regardless of the chatter as I’m now deaf to it. This is the most empowering thing I’ve ever done. I will not be a piece in the toxic cycle anymore as I’ve removed myself. I’m blessed to have those who’ve been by me, been my guides and walked beside me in both positive and negative dualities. Now, I’m free and its time to start the magical journey that the universe has intended for me. Through life there’s death it ebbs and flows, things end, new things are born and new lessons and paths are sewn. The cyclic pattern has been broken now the universe has spoken. I’m so ready for this its my time to fly and my actions and determination will dictate how high. At the darkest hour in my greatest despair I question why the hell is this happening to me. It was the final test to see how this time I would deal with it. I dealt with it differently. I was finally prepared and I revealed the lies and deception by having concrete evidence. I released what had been held inside for so long and walked out the door with the strength I finally needed. Once I made the choice I’d been evading my whole adult life I took back my power and decided to finally start living my life for me. Through that action I finally gained the knowledge to my inner peace. The missing key to the door that allows me my peace, freedom and independence was finally unlocked. This will be my greatest challenge as i can’t relapse and my boundaries need to be firm I know I’ve got this I’m never going to be subjected to this personality type again without the skills to deflect it. The rewards are all ready being revealed. I feel like I’ve just broken the final binding to an ancient seal to my potential life destiny. It’s been a path of humbleness, pain, humility, torture and so many other emotions that I no longer deserve to feel. I’ve fed them by trying to defend and reacting. I no longer will allow it to effect my world I’m not another victim and I’m taking the steps required to heal with professional assistance and guidance. The inner core is finally being dealt with and cleansed. My outer world will reflect my true hearts yearning without sabotage of thyself or others. I don’t need to defend or prove myself to anyone other than myself actions speak louder than words and silence is golden. My journey is mine yours is yours and I will do as my heart dictates you can keep doing what you do I make no judgement. You can judge me I don’t care and I don’t have the time to. Life is beautiful if you want it to be and I’m so lucky I’ve always had my girls, friends and nature to remind me. I’ll never understand why people do evil vindictive things and I don’t have to. It’s something that I’ll never get and I’m not going to try as to why or how. I couldn’t do it therefore I will never understand the thought process or reasoning to ones actions. I can only control mine by my conscience and at the end of the day I need to be able to know its me I have to live with and my soul I see reflected when I stare deep into it. It's those things you take to your grave and I’m at peace knowing my actions, my truths without guilt or acting out revenge to get even. Instead I’m walking away knowing I’ve washed the shit from my hands and with it the memories attached to it in the past where they will stay. I wish you all the best and the utmost success in your endeavours and life. Its time for me to finally close off the doors and shut this chapter of my life. I’m taking my power back and not buying in ever again regardless of the new angle that will be played. Mustering strength from within has been one of the most difficult things I’ve done at the age of 38. The time has finally come to live my life by the script I write not another’s. Creating inner peace starting at the inner core of my world. Reflecting that beauty to my outer core and creating my dream in a simple realistic and achievable manner. With a strength of character that is indestructible and the same core values I’ve always had. The difference is I’m stronger than I’ve ever been before and determined to never be a victim of another’s extremely low insecurities fuelled by a personality disorder I actually dodged. I’m beginning to believe its a choice and being self aware is the first step to making the right ones towards the recovery from this abuse. Therapy is essential on both sides of the empath/narcissist battle and the only road to healing and resolution of the narcissistic family tree. So I’m back in therapy as my kids will not be victims of this cycle. This is where it ends and the recovery begins Peace and Love. TLC

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