#and he does NOT want to fuck this up with bond

[pit-and-the-pen]

I Can Do It With a Broken Heart (Pt 2 to unrequited love)

A/n: HERE IT IS BESTIES!!! The official Pt 2 to unrequited love! I know the poll is still live but I’m impatient. So to make sure I’m still taking everyone’s votes into account there will be an alternate ending that should be posted right after this.

Read the Alt ending here, it's pretty similar in places

I'm still absolutely blown away by how well-received the first part was. This is going to be an ongoing series, all could be read individually but the "background" will be these two fics.

Warnings: Angst, Cursing, reader suffers from depressed thoughts

WC: ~3.4k

divder by @cafekitsune

The next morning I was in Rhys office. He barely even looked up from the paper strewn over his desk before I spoke. 

“I’m going back home.” 

He sighed, leaning back into his chair. His eyes raked over me, “Does this have anything to do with why Azriel was so huffy this morning?” His eyebrow raised and I felt the anger I’d been trying to quell since last night rise its head up like a sleeping dragon.

“Fuck off. Let him be mad if he wants to be mad.” I snapped. 

“Mad isn’t exactly how I would put it,” He paused looking at me. “What happened?” The High Lord questioned. I sighed not having the strength to recount the events from last night. 

“Nothing but the inevitable.” he frowned at my non-answer but didn’t press any harder. 

“I’ll miss you. We all will.” He said finally. I nodded. 

“You all should visit.” Not an I’ll visit. No. If I could avoid it I would never step foot into this miserable court ever again. 

I was gone by mid-morning. Mor had helped me winnow the things I wanted to take with me. What they did with the rest wasn’t any of my concern. Rhys or Feyre had bought it all for me anyways, let them decide what to do with their money. 

Once I had gotten settled into my room, I hugged Mor goodbye and thanked her for her help. She just gave me a tighter hug and told me she would visit soon. 

It was two weeks before I could see Helion.Two weeks of settling back into my court that I loved so dearly.  He was visiting Dawn court for some trade agreement that needed to be signed. I came by every day, asking if he’d returned you. His second would just silently shake her head at me. And I would stomp back to my room like an angry babe. 

Two weeks of checking before I finally saw her nod her head and I had to stop myself from running into Helions office. I had the control to at least knock on the door but not much else. I quickly shut the door behind me as he called me in. 

“Sunbeam!” He called out when saw my face. “I had hoped the rumors of you moving back home were true.” He walked around the desk and gave me a brisk hug. Very out of character for him. 

“You’re not an easy man to schedule an appointment with, Helion.” I smiled warmly at the High Lord of my court. 

“If you wanted a piece of me, you only had to say the words and I would have come running darling.” There's the flirt I remember. I thought, rolling my eyes.

“But judging by your urgency in requesting a meeting that my second expressed to me, I’m going to assume that’s not what you wanted to see me for.”

My smile dropped as I braced myself for the question I needed to ask him.

“I need you to break a mating bond”

His mouth fell open. For once in my life, Helion was speechless. “I don’t know if I can even do that. Are you sure that’s what you want?” His eyes saw right through me. I threw my head back, a sad laugh bubbling past my lips. 

“Yes. No. Gods I don’t know. I just don’t want it to hurt like this forever.” I felt treacherous tears starting to fall down my face. Helion grabbed my arms gently before I could wipe them away. 

“I know you well enough to know that you don’t run away from hard things.” He held me against his chest as I really started to sob. 

“Helion. Every second that I’m away from him it kills me. I’m over here dying inside over some male who only ever saw me as a second option.” 

“Then he’s an idiot. But the mother still saw fit to make you two mates. Give it some more thought, you’re clearly still not fully decided. I’ll do some research to see if it’s even possible and if you still want to, I’ll be here to help.” I nodded my thanks into his shirt. He takes my head between his hands and uses his thumbs to wipe the tears still streaking down my face. He gives me a gentle kiss on the top of my head before I walk out of the room. 

I sat on the decision for a month. A month of volleying back and forth. Weighting the pros and cons of my choice. I had started doing my own research through the tomes in the library I had access to. My eyes widened as I finally found the information I needed. 

Picking up the book I all but sprinted to Helion’s office. I didn't bother knocking as I pushed past the door. Helion looked up from his desk and raised an eyebrow at me. 

Panting, I showed him the page in the book. “Are you sure?”

“I’ve never been more sure of anything in my whole life.” I promised him. He still looked skeptical but walked around to where I stood anyway. 

“I can’t say this is going to be pleasant.” He said wearily as I laid down on the couch in his study. “I’ve never heard of anyone doing this. I’ve seen rejection but this is cutting off the magic at the source.”

I looked into the males eyes, eyes I had known my whole life.

“Please. Nothing can hurt more than this already does.” Sympathy washed over his face and he leaned over me, placing a hand to each of my temples. It felt like the worst headache I had ever had in my life. My head was being split open and I heard the whimper leave my mouth. The pressure of his hands lifted slightly and I fought to get out the words. “I’m okay. Keep going.” I couldn’t open my eyes to see his face but his hands didn’t move. The pounding broke to a burning heat. I could feel the moment it snapped, I could almost picture the scissors snipping that tight string that connected us. One last fleeting rush of pure pain pushed through the bond. And then it was gone. My head was still pounding, I opened my eyes and saw Helion panted above me. 

“How do you feel?” He asked, helping me into a sitting position. 

“Like I have one hell of a hangover.” I pressed a hand to the bridge of my nose. Like I could squeeze out the uncomfortable feeling. “But also lighter.” My free hand going to my chest. It would take some time to adjust to this new feeling. But I could not stop the smile that spread over my face. Before Helion could say anything else, I reached up to wrap my arms around his neck.

“I can’t thank you enough.” I said into his neck. He gave a tight laugh and hugged me back. 

“You should go sleep this off. Please tell me if any of the pain gets worse.” He held my face between his hands and I nodded as much as I could. I all but floated back to my room. 

I fell into a familiar routine back in the Day Court. I took up my old job as a researcher. My days were spent surrounded by the massive libraries of my home court. People would come to us with questions and it was our job to use the knowledge at our disposal to find them answers. It kept me busy at the very least, but I did have to admit that I love doing it. I felt more useful here than I ever had at the Night Court. Pangs of sadness would rip through me when someone snarked in a way that made me think of Cassian. When someone would smirk and I could only picture Rhysand standing in front of me as he beat me in chess. The art was so beautiful that I longed to show Feyre if only to see that twinkle in eye as she dissected the colors and shading used. 

I smiled as the pang in my chest at the thought of Azriel held no pain. It had taken me some time to get used to the emptiness in my chest, I had grown so used to the hollow feeling of the unreturned bond but this emptiness wasn’t pain but instead it was like a weight had been taken off my chest. 

Someone calling my name pulled me from my musing. One of the messengers, Dia, smiled brightly up at me. “Hey sunbeam. Helion asked me to deliver this to you.” I took the golden envelope from her. I thanked her and she turned around, leaving me back to my books. 

I slid my finger under the seal and pulled out the letter. He was flirty even in a letter. He had requested that I accompany him to the latest ball he was hosting. Helion, ever the charmer, even placed boxes for me to check yes or no. I giggled to myself at the juvenile nature of it, but checked yes with the quill sitting next to me. 

The ball was just a few days away and I was so excited as dress after dress were brought into my room for me to try on. The one that ended up catching my eye was a floor length glossimer dress, such a pale golden color it looked almost like sunlight itself. The bottom was dyed a light pink color that flowed into it seamlessly. It took my breath away as I smoothed out the light fabric. It fit like a glove and I knew instantly this was the dress I had to wear. 

My reflection looked like a stranger. My hair was pinned to one side, sweeping down over my shoulder and my back. A golden tiara was woven into loose curls. Long golden chandelier earrings studded with diamonds almost touched my shoulders. The sun had created a sultry blush on the high points of my cheeks. I looked happier than I had in years. I sensed Helion's presence in my room and caught his eyes in the floor length mirror. 

He let out a low whistle and I blushed, adjusting my tiara. I walked over to him and he held out his hand for me, twirling me around dramatically when I took it. “No one will be able to take their eyes off of you, Sunbeam.” His eyes hungirly raked over me, “If you ever reconsider my offer. I would take you to bed in a heartbeat. Just say the words.” I pushed his shoulder, I didn’t doubt his words. 

“Keep your pants on Helion. We have a ball to get to.” 

“I’m High Lord. I can be late.” His pupils had dilated and I rolled my eyes, pushing him out the door before I linked my arm into his. 

The ball was as lavish as I had expected. There was much to celebrate and this was mostly to welcome the new High Lord. Eris. Beron had finally died a few months back and Eris had officially stepped into the role with grace. The autumn court once known for its cruelty seemed to be taking a new direction and as I talked to nobility from the court, it was for the better. I had gotten to know him over the years, his frequent visits to the Night Court, plus a few flirty exchanges that I always brushed off, while he was helping us during the war softened me to him. Learning the true events of that night with Mor. 

I locked eyes with Eris across the room. He had been heartbreakingly handsome when he was just High Fae but as a High Lord? His hair had grown slightly longer, just touching his shoulders. Dressed in a deep maroon suit that showed off every single one of his muscles. The permanent scowl that had been etched into his face had been replaced with a smile that radiated comfort. My feet seemed to move without deciding to. Eris kept his eyes locked onto mine as I got closer. My cheeks heated up under his intense stare. 

“Hi little sunbeam,” Honeyed words wrapped around me. “Seems like you’re no longer hiding in the shadows.” He held out his hand, eyes flickering to the dance floor. I smiled up at him and gently placed my hand in his. 

His touch was firm and the warmth of his power radiated off of him. He clutched my waist, pulling me flush to his front. I felt every plane of his toned body pressed against me and goosebumps broke out across my skin having nothing to do with the temperature in the room. The two of us gilded across the floor. I could feel the eyes of the room on us but I only had eyes for the male in front of me. 

“If I had known you danced this good, I would have pulled you out of that miserable court a long time ago.” He spoke into the shell of my ear.  “I’ll never understand what the Shadowslinger was thinking, even I could smell the mating bond on you. Plus, one look at me with those beautiful doe eyes and I would have been putty in your hands.” He nipped at my earlobe and I felt it deep in my stomach. 

“Well good thing he’s not my mate anymore.” I whispered back to him, voice breathy. He responded with a kiss to my neck. All of a sudden I felt his warmth disappear. Before I could even process what had happened, I was standing half ways across the room. Eris just smirked, eyes twinkling with mischief. 

“Stand down, you overgrown bat.” The High Lord said and that’s when I heard the growl from my side, caught a glimpse of wings and sapphire blue. Before another word could leave my mouth, I was being pulled out of the ballroom and outside to the balcony. 

I thrashed against Azriel’s grip on my arm. His hand wrapped around my wrist tight enough to bruise. 

“What the hel was that?” He yelled at me, finally letting go of my wrist.

“You had no right!” I screeched at him. Anger seethed through me. I felt my palms heat up from the light trying to escape from them. He went to grab my arm and I ripped it back from his reach. “Don’t you fucking dare.” 

“Please.” Was all he said and suddenly it was like that night all over again. Me pouring my heart out and all he could say was please. 

“Please what, Azriel? Is that all you know how to do, beg and plead. For what? Was breaking my heart once not enough for you.” 

“Gods. What do you want me to say?” He ran his hands through his hair. He looked like he was about to lose it. Good. “Do you want to hear how I was fucking terrified. How any good thing that I had ever received had been taken away from me? That when I felt that twinge in my chest, that I knew what it meant but prayed to the gods that it wasn’t that.” I went to start in on him again. “Would hearing that I looked for you in every female I came across help us here?.” 

“Stop. Just stop. I’m sure you’ve rehearsed this all before but do you actually think I’m stupid enough to believe it?” I spit out between my teeth. 

“No. Gods this is coming out all wrong.” He ran a frantic hand through his hair. I clocked the shake in them “Why did you break the bond?”

I laughed at his audacity. “Why? You have the nerve to ask me why?” My voice dripped venom, “I did it because I couldn’t stand being tied to you like that. That night..” I started, he interrupted me.

“I said the most vile things I could think of. I panicked when you told me about the bond. If you could feel it too, I knew nothing good could have come from that so I pushed you away.” I shook my head, as if I could shake his words away from my ears. 

“You seemed so shocked when I told you.” 

His head sunk down, voice small “I was shocked because no part of me believed, believes, that I deserve you in that way.” When he stepped forward, I didn’t step away. Mind too busy catching up with his words. “Please say something. “ 

I turned my eyes up to look at him. Hazel eyes soft sparkling with unshed tears. I wanted to rip into him. I truly did. Some sick part of me wanted to make him hurt like he had hurt me but I know that wouldn’t fix anything here. What is done was done. 

“You don’t get to do this to me. You don’t get to say all the right things and just have me forgive you. You don’t get to say that you love me after everything you did.” He sighed. Leaning his head on top of mine. I frowned at the contact, but didn’t push him away, refusing to melt into him. “Whatever your reason. You said all those things that you knew would hurt me, you said them and some part of you had to believe them.” 

“I know. There isn’t a day that I don’t regret everything that I said, everything I had put you through over all those years. I took you for granted and I didn’t realize how much I loved you until you were gone. Until I felt that bond being snatched away from me” I wanted to push him back but something in me let his words sink into my bones. 

“I had dreamed for so long how it would feel when I finally heard you say those words, And do you know what I feel?” His eyes glimmered with hope as I took a step away from him, out of his grasp. “Nothing. I feel nothing for you. Not anger, not contempt.” Tears slipped out of his eyes at my harsh words. “Of course I remember what it felt like before. Maybe some part of me will always love you in my own way but I’m not tied to you anymore and I have never been so thankful for something in my entire life.” He flinched like I had hit him.

“Do you really mean that?” His voice was so small it almost made me feel bad for him. Almost.

“I do.” I sucked in a heavy breath. “Look, we’ll most likely still have to see each other so I don’t want to end on a bad note. You were still one of my best friends for over a century and this doesn’t undo all of that but this,” I gesture between the two of us, “Will never be anything else but that, a friendship.” He gave me a sad smile. 

“I’ll take whatever you are willing to give me.” I turned to walk away and he reached for my arm, I grabbed his hand and gave it a gentle squeeze before I walked back to the ball that was in full swing. 

I weaved in between bodies easily. Finding Eris with ease. Despite being in the middle of a conversation, he stepped away the moment he sensed my presence. Not sparing a glance to the fae surrounding him. 

“That’s all settled then?” He asked, giving me a once over. I nodded and took his hand again.

“I believe we were in the middle of a dance?” I pulled him against me, not realizing how much I missed the feeling of his heat against my skin. I placed my head on his chest. We didn’t so much as dance, more so swayed in place. Arms wrapped around each other. He tapped my chin with a gentle finger and I let him guide my mouth up to his. The kiss was soft and sweet, like holding your hands in front of a warm fire after a day in the cold. When I tried to deepen it, he laughed against my lips. I let out a shameless whine as he disconnected our lips. As I looked into his eyes, I felt the stirring of something familiar and for the first time, welcomed it as that hole in my chest was filled again.

Tagging people that seemed excited about pt. 2

@cleverzonkwombatsludge @yearninglustfully @myromanempiree @starsandsins @melmo567 @saltedcoffeescotch

#azriel acotar #unrequited love #acomaf #acosf #acotar fanfiction #acotar #azriel angst #eris vanserra #eris x you #eris x reader #angst #hurt/comfort #eris acotar #eris fluff #eris vandaddy

[loveyourownsmiilee]

Like honestly as a Buddie shipper, what the fuck are we supposed to focus on??? What does all of this mean if not Buddie canon???

We get closer than ever this season. There’s a lot of changes in the relationship and how we interact. We’re trying to give the audience what they want.

Well, there’s something brand new for both of us. I can only say that much.

Outside of Christopher, Buck would be the second closest thing that he can have as a relationship.

And then go to Buck and say, 'I trust you with my child, and I see how much you put in for my son; this goes beyond friendship, and I love you to the core. To have that sense of vulnerability is a sense of strength that has been shown.

And the way Eddie navigates that is just kind of a no, that's just who he is. And nothing ruffles my feathers. Even if you break my ankle or maim me, it's fine. That's who he is, and I love him either way. And there's no competition for Eddie.

I don't think that the Buddie fans are wrong.

There is a chemistry there that exists just naturally, so we don't have to try and lean into that or lean away from that. We just let it flow.

Oh, 100%. 100%. I watch certain edits and I think 'Am I Team Buddie?' because there are really talented editors out there. And you know how it is.

Obviously Eddie and Ryan who plays him is obviously an attractive man.

I think with this season 7, we got a lot in store for the audience. You give them what they’ve known and a lot of what they don’t.

There’s a scene in the first episode, where Eddie reveals that he's going — or he mentions a first date, and it in fact ends up being Christopher's first date. And Buck has this moment of "Oh. I thought things were going great with Marisol...' So little moments where I felt like, 'Is there scope to play with Buck?'

They've both become quite embedded in each other's lives. "I think they've kind of bonded and connected on so many levels, whether it be work, their personal lives and then add in that kind of fun dynamic where they clearly do just get on well. I think it's just a nice recipe for a good relationship, however you choose to see it.

There's some really beautiful stuff between him and Eddie and kind of them being open and sharing things with each other that they may have been reluctant to share with—I know how that's going to be taken. But it's true. [They're] there for each other in a very kind of open and nonjudgmental way.

They get to show up for each other in different ways. Moving forward there’s almost like potential for things to come up in a not so great light. But we get to see their friendship persevering, and them being there in ways they didn’t necessarily expect for each other. And I just, it’s a really lovely journey for them this season.

Eddie doesn't really have a sense of direction, so he reaches out for the closest person, and that closest person is Buck.

And Eddie was a mess. I think at that moment, the friendship had a turning point and now has allowed Buck and Eddie to really share as much or whatever they'd want, the scariest things in the world they could share with each other. And we're going to be seeing more of that this season.

As far as [Eddie's] sexuality, I think it's pretty clear that he's tried to fill in this motherly, this wife type role—that's all he knows…"And he's a man [that] first off, he's Catholic. Second off, he's from the military. So those are very straight-edge kind of lifestyles that don't offer too much of exploring. But through the 118, he's had this epiphany each year, like, 'Well, maybe I don't know as much as I thought I did. And maybe I should be exploring a little bit more and maybe I should understand myself a little bit more and even seek a therapist, which is something new for Eddie.

He is actually starting to figure out who he is outside of 'I am an Army man who has a silver badge! ... He's way more than that. He's starting to live in that [feeling] a little bit more, and I think that's freeing to him.

At this point we can’t be reading between the lines or coming to random conclusions when every thing said is so blatantly obvious.

#buddie #ryan guzman #oliver stark #ryliver #LIKE WHAT DOES ALL THIS MEAN #HOW IS IT ALL NOT LEADING TO BUDDIE #yes I’m back with another compilation sue me #thank you for coming to my ted talk

[allsebaciel]

Something that antis who "analyze BB as media that is meant to 'cause discomfort' by displaying shotacon themes" forget is that creative texts (be they in visual, textual, or audial form) are highly psychological in the sense that you can't perfectly measure out every bit of the emotional reaction you will get from your audience.

Yes, there are writers who will specifically want to make their reader question certain moral dogmas, concepts, and ideas. There are also writers who end up writing particular concepts into their story by sheer accident.

In case of BB, though, one can't say that Yana is trying to "make her audience uncomfortable" by showing Sebaciel dynamics because nothing about it is uncomfortable. She definitely wrote it in on purpose, but claiming that it is supposed to cause some sort of a deep discussion on how Sebastian is a Bad Guy is laughable; because S/C relationship is a positive one.

Sebastian is presented - directly, indirectly, symbolically - as Ciel's only source of comfort and protection. Yes, it is a tainted liaison because it's the Devil's sacrament. It's erotic, sensual, intimate - and it's utterly comfortable.

Sebastian is the only person whose touch is comfortable to Ciel. He's among the few adults he trusts being in his vicinity. He's comfortable being alone with him. Ciel heals through his sickened bond with Sebastian. Yes, Sebastian craves him in the flesh-based, primal way. Whether you view it as erotic, beastly, or morbid does not matter: Sebastian craves Ciel. And Ciel is comfortable with that.

Yana did not fucking write it for nearly two decades to have some goddamn idiot who knows nothing about PTSD come in and say that Sebaciel is meant to be a "gross thing causing people discomfort". Sebaciel is a part of the story in the sense, "Sebastian and Ciel have A Relationship: whether it's predatory, romantic, sexual, or anything along the lines doesn't matter, but it's ultimately positive."

#text #pro sebaciel #sebaciel #pro proship #proship #kuroshitsuji #black butler

[nuttyblizzardinternet]

Ok so Clawdeen is dating Torali now? Wtf, wouldn't it make more sense if someone who was NOT Torali you know the person who bullied all her friends and ruins every single plan they have. Like Torali is a walking talking red flag, but ok sis. You know who needs to dump their boyfriend and get with someone who would actually understand and treat her better? LAGOONA idk why there hasn't been a wlw ship between Lagoona and Clawdeen because it would make more sense than whatever the hell Clawdeen x Torali is. And tbh I know how much y'all love Draculaura and Clawdeen together but there's absolutely no reason for Draculaura to date Clawdeen when she's already in a perfect stable relationship. Lagoona, however the poor girl is dating a literal coward with no spine who doesn't go the extra mile for her because of his lame ass excuses regarding his parents biasies towards Lagoona like if the motherfucker wanted Lagoona so badly he do anything for her but he's a coward and then the motherfucker has the audacity to go to a dance without her with another girl and spend more time with Lorna than he does his own girlfriend. This dude is a fucking scrub compared to the other guys at monster high even Heath would treat Lagoona better and that's not saying much because it's well........ Heath. But who has been there for Lagoona since day 1? Clawdeen, she's never given up on Lagoona not even once and their bond is stronger than Lagoona and Gill's bond. I'm surprised Lagoona hasn't broken up with Gill already because I would if I was in her shoes.

Anyways PETITION TO MAKE CLAWDEEN x LAGOONA A THING BECAUSE I LIVE FOR IT.

#monster high #Lagoona blue #clawdeen wolf #wlw ship #lesbian pride #toralei stripe #gillington webber

[fear-is-truth]

THERE’S NOTHING MORE DANGEROUS THAN A HUMILIATED JEALOUS MAN

jealousy headcanons─ kai anderson x gn!reader

WARNINGS: nsfw. mdni!! toxic relationship, degradation, manipulation, mentions of sex

when you're out together, Kai becomes possessive and jealous at the slightest hint of attention you get from others. if someone so much as glances in your direction, he accuses you of leading them on or being flirtatious. Kai also gaslights you to make you feel guilty for the actions of others, then demands you to prove your undying loyalty to him.

sometimes, during cult meetings, he pulls you onto his lap, a blatant display of ownership and control. as you settle onto him, you can feel the bulge of his crotch rub against your ass, the possessiveness in his touch as he pinches your thigh, the aggression in his voice sending a clear message to everyone present that you belong to him.

Kai leaves his mark on you with strategically placed hickeys, a physical manifestation of his possessiveness. his lips trail along your skin, leaving a trail of bruises in the most obvious places, a deliberate reminder to anyone who sees them that you belong to him.

whenever another cult member dares to engage with you for too long or watches you with lingering interest, Kai's body language becomes tense, his jaw clench and nostrils flare with barely concealed rage and jealousy.

his grip tightens around your hips as he presses you against the wall, lips crashing against yours in a sloppy yet possessive kiss. his arms form a cage around you, trapping you effectively. rage and lust war in his eyes as he pants heavily, hot breath tickling your skin as he pulls you closer, hips grinding into yours. “who the fuck does he think he is, laying eyes on you like that?” he growls, voice low and tinged with jealousy as he peppers a trail of angry kisses along your jawline. you try to protest, but he grabs you roughly by the back of your neck and shoves his tongue down your throat, reveling in the little sounds you make

on cult missions, Kai deliberately avoids pairing you up with Winter, fearing any potential romantic connection between the two of you. he’s paranoid about losing control over you and his sister. that’s why you always end up being paired with Harrison or Samuels.

he obsessively monitors your social media activity, scrutinising every post, like, and comment. to maintain further surveillance, he goes as far as creating fake accounts to stalk you online, ensuring he's always aware of your interactions and movements.

during “pinky power”, Kai uses the guise of honesty pry into your past relationships and sexual exploits, gathering information that he can use to his benefit. he makes mental notes on your preferences, all while subtly comparing himself to your past partners.

driven by his competitive nature and jealousy, Kai is fixated on being the best fuck you’ve ever had. every time you two have sex, he strives to outperform your past lovers. he studies your reactions, using his knowledge to give you mind-blowing, earth-shattering orgasms designed to addict you to him completely.

he belittles you all the time, calling you an “useless cumslut” or “incompetent bitch” making you feel inadequate and insecure. with every mistake, he reminds you that you're replaceable, instilling a constant fear of disappointing him and falling short of his expectations.

despite his harsh treatment to you, Kai strategically dangles fleeting moments of affection that keeps you hooked. he holds you in his arms and calls you his “little lamb”, sometimes even allowing you to run your fingers through his hair. in these rare moments, he knows exactly how to keep you wrapped around his finger, making you feel cherished and special. forming an emotional bond that makes it hard for you to leave him.

in the end, Kai is a toxic, controlling, misogynistic edgelord. he’s obsessed with revolution and world domination. he’s the last person you’d want to be in a relationship with. but remember the time he slapped Meadow for “wasting his time”? if you truly are nothing but a worthless, replaceable fucktoy like he claims you to be, then why would he even bother giving you the time of day, let alone dedicating hours to obsess over you?

the answer is simple: he loves you.

a/n: sorry this sucks. literally wrote this in 30 minutes

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#american horror story #ahs #kai anderson #evan peters #ahs cult #kai anderson x reader #kai anderson x y/n #kai anderson headcanons #Kai Anderson smut #kai anderson imagines #tate langdon #james patrick march #kit walker #kit walker x y/n #kit walker x you #jpm x reader #jimmy darling x y/n #jimmy darling x reader #tate langdon x you #tate langdon x y/n #evan peters x female reader #evan peters x y/n #evan peters x reader #ahs season 7 #Tate Langdon smut #kit walker x reader #evan peters imagine #kai anderson fluff #kai anderson imagine #kai anderson cult

[alastorsfuckassbobb]

Daaamn, he look low-key kinda attractive in this pic- Anyways, anywaaaaayys... Another thing on my season 2 wishlist of Hazbin, is a 👏🏿MUST-NEEDED 👏🏿 FILLER EPISODE👏🏿 At-least one!!! And before anyone says, "waaaaah!! I hate filler eps, they don't bring anything to the plot!!" Shut your weakass up. Cuz, yeah they really don't bring anything to the plot sometimes. But it does bring stuff to the characters, and their relationships with one another, and I plead, I fucking plead, they add one to the second season, either that be a beach ep. (Do they have beaches in hell? I don't know-) Or imagine this, a girls day out ep! Wouldn't that be cute? And they can finally focus on the female characters, flesh em out! They can be the main plot, either they go to a club, or bar, or just on some random adventure. And the boys can be the subplot, or other plot whatever you say, they can stay behind, and hopefully tend to the hotel. And they can bond, or something, hopefully stir up some drama, fight duel whatever. I also want to see a characters backstory, (I hope Alastor.) But it can literally be anyone, fuck! Even some random ass character like Susan, I just wanna see a human! I don't even care if it's a fucking nose. 😭 🤦🏿‍♀️ I just want to see a person.

#hazbin hotel #charlie morningstar #vaggie #vaggie hazbin hotel #alastor #lucifer morningstar #angel dust #hazbin hotel husk #huskerdust #radioapple #chaggie #wishlist #angels #demons #season 2 #niffty #sir pentious #vivienne medrano #vivziepop #vivzieverse #erika henningsen #stephanie beatriz #amir talai #fat nuggets #cherri bomb #helluva boss #girls day out #girls day #boys day #boys day out

[kel-lance]

Team Bonding: JJK students x reader x sukuna Part 3

- TW: Dead dove dont read (DDDR) Minors do not interact (MDNI): SA, Physical Assault, DubCon, NonCon, Mindbreak, Public Humiliation, Multiple manipulation, RWORD, PTSD, a lot more.

- Premise: Characters are (18+) (Reader is 21) Jujutsu College au where things are the same but they found yuuji/He ate the finger at 18/+ the start of college.

- Yuuji “came back” after two months of “being dead” and you’re in charge of the training for today for the kyoto sister event.

- Sukuna switches with yuuji in this and chaos ensues :/

After was the worst fucking thing in the world. As much as you wished you could have blacked out the reality of it, or at least the hour after but you were wide awake, laying there. Yuuji was the one knocked out, Sukuna had switched back to gave you some time to clean yourself up. (Slapping you awake, reminding you to stay awake bc of your head injuries.)

His deal was that Yuuji doesn’t find out, that whenever he came around, they would show him your homework, and if he wasn’t satisfied with it he would show them what he wanted to see. After what they witnessed, they really couldn’t let that happen again, bc they knew it would be worse if he were to touch you rather than them. 

Whenever he did want to get a rise out of you, he’d start eyeing Maki and Nobara, where you roar back to life and have more fight in you. You knew first hand how awful he was, you weren’t going to let him hurt more people. 

Yuuji, if he ever finds out, would probably off himself, and we know it’s not his fault so we can’t let that happen either. “You won’t know when I’ll be back, so do your best.” He was fucking sick.

Everyone decided to stay with you, in trios. At night you were with the girls as that didn’t raise suspicion from the RT’s. Sometimes though, the other pairs would volunteer and watch you in your room while you slept during the day, if you ever needed it.

Nobara helps you more often, and tries to help you ground yourself by holding your hand. Her thing now was to lightly apply pressure to the joints of your hands to ground you, until you leaned into her for a hug or pulled away, signaling what was going on in your head.

Maki would always keep a look out. “That was fucking horrific to watch.” She could remember how the Zenin clan were so gross with trying to sell her and her sister off. The older men would look but they didn’t want responsibility for them, let alone chance that they couldn’t chance their own being born without cursed energy. It was more of an insult to be presented Maki, as Mai does have some. 

Her own personal feelings weren’t really what was fueling it, the threat of and forced witnessing of mistreatment without being able to do anything… She’ll play his game but never let him touch you again. After speaking with Nobara, you asked to smoke to knock yourself out. 

Medicine is the best rn, your body’s healed, but your mental, it was sure something you couldn’t heal. It was a lot in the moment and you’d just want to revert back to your old ways of coping and you knew they’d understand, but they wouldn’t let you.

So just a hit or two, as much as you could hold in, until your lungs burned, that it spread up to your throat and seared your nostrils. It was a really dry cough, and you were a mess, your eyes tearing and spit was caught in your sleeve, and you tried to wipe your running nose too. These hits were the ones where you didn’t look, somehow that helped you take in more air. Maybe it was better concentration, in this case you just wanted to be unconscious. 

After they put the piece away, and asked if you wanted help in the bath. You could feel the tension as your confident, abrasive and loud self was unblinking, staring out to nothing. You had just gotten back to your rooms as Gojo came back a little bit too late, where he found you were sitting with a thousand yard stare. 

The others were so quiet, and Yuuji knocked out on the floor, he could only come to the conclusion, “Did I miss out on a really crazy fight or something?” No one responded. “Wow,” He places a hand behind his head, looking at the dim crowd. “Okay… Well, class is dismissed for today. Can someone help me bring Yuuji to Shoko? Megumi? Thanks.”

Megumi broke out of his shell shock and looked down at his friend. That look told Gojo something, but the Honored One wasn’t interested in his students’ relationships (when they’re all seemingly fresh into the drama). He’ll wait or bug it out of his somewhat son. Megs got Yuuji on his back, acting like his friend was more hurt than let on. You knew Megs was in a tough spot, and he was acting his BEST, in front of Gojo no less. He couldn’t lie unless it was jokingly, and even that was rare.  

________________________________________________________

Maki helps you stand in the shower, she’s in her underwear to help you make it more comfortable. She knew to keep testing out the water before realizing you were getting lost in your dizzy spur as Nobara comes in with her phone. 

“Nobara.” Your friend held you up and pulls you into her. “What are you doing?”

“It sounds heartless,” She started. “But I thought if we took pictures now, it’d give (y/n) more time away from Sukuna.” Maki’s hold on you loosened a bit, going back to grab at the loofa and pumping body soap onto it. Nobara continued. “I was going over our options and honestly, who knows what he’ll do next. I don’t even-“

Maki sighs loudly, asking her to stop talking. There was a pause, letting Maki think further into this. “It’s up to (y/n).” 

“It’s really not.” You thought. This whole situation wouldn’t be happening if you could even let it. “Nothing after this is going to be mine. Everything was given away in front of everyone, your entire being bare, your most vulnerable just out in daylight. You couldn’t even be glad it was just in front of your friends, what if strangers saw, or your professors, and what if they couldn’t help you too?

Maki held you and had you lean your weight on her. Nobara grit her teeth, she wanted to ask you what you wanted but obviously this was the best solution. It wasn’t to save herself, it wasn’t to save just you either. Everyone’s lives were at risk because of this horny demon.

But really, blackmail? That’s what it’s come to. That’s really the only thing that could get your people to turn on you. You thought they knew you better, that you’d rather choose to die than let the humiliation continue. Maybe it was because you missed your chance to voice your opinion, of your own body, of the situation you staggered in not so long ago.  

The shock though, the over exertion of using your reversed curse technique really was a challenge, You usually hold off the healing until after, showing off once again. The pain would make you feel alive, and let them know they were landing their punches and hits. You eye at the shower handle, to make the water temperature hotter. 

Burning, you wanted to feel clean. You wanted to have your skin melt off like a layer of wax. The places on the outside where he’s touched, honestly chop them off. You would rather have a meat cleaver cut them clean off than have any more blood pulsate under your violated skin. And the pit in your stomach, it wasn’t even a pit anymore you were sick, he left sick in you and it was spreading. Your head hurt, your vulva and the actual cylinder that makes up your core, you wanted to cut it out, or shove a hot metal rod inside to cauterize the wound, or to clean the area with fire.

Or maybe even you’d eat the rod, have it melt through your neck as you have a few seconds of searing bliss. But instead you’ll have to be okay with the hot water of the shower. Nobara notices your eyes and tells Maki that you’re cold, and to get started so they could help you to bed faster. 

The water that hit your chest was at a steady pressure, the temp rising an your skin started to blotch and turn pinker. Your body was tingling and the hot water was almost getting you to feel your body again. it was almost comforting but it just wasn’t engulfing you like you needed. You needed a feeling to wash this all away. And sure the weed was helping but at the same time, it was still so soon. 

“(Y/n), I’m going to start now okay?” Maki said behind you. Her left arm was keeping you up and letting you lean onto her leg, her right hand is on your right side, making its way down your waist and she lightly places her hand on your butt. You don’t really mind this, until her fingers came close to your entrance. Your legs lightly moved closing together. “Hey,” You look up at Nobara, who was recording. “Please (y/n), let us help you.” 

You lower your gaze, looking away defeated, you slightly open your knees, letting Maki in but not wanting to. Her finger made itself known around your core, before she tapped you twice to let you know that she was going in. Her finger plunged into you slowly, just in and out. Your body shook with the sudden movement. “Sorry.” You both say. 

She digs in deep again but keeps her finger in, it was really weird honestly. This was your friend? And your other was also “helping”? But they seem so disgusted. You didn’t like this. You wanted them to praise you, you wanted them to think you were awesome and the best and super cool. Why was this so awful? Why was this so awkward and cruel? 

They switch, Nobara is taking her fingers out of you and you can feel it come out, while maki takes her now wet clothes off and positions the camera to help clean up your face. Nobara’s holding you up in the shower, digging her fingers as deeply as she could, but as gently too to not hurt you, or make you more uncomfortable than you already are. Maki comes back in, placing her hands on your hips, moving your wet hair from the nape of your neck. 

They know you don’t like small talk, and they had nothing to say. There was nothing to joke about, nothing to bring up or gossip about, no silly joke or new grand idea to tackle in the future. For once you all were stunned into the present, facing something that they can’t control the progress of. Nobara lifts her head up to look at you; If you did look back at her, then there was something worth saving, something she knew would still be a part of you is just waiting there, for this to all go away, and she was right. If you hadn’t looked, you were worse than dead’ according to your old beliefs. 

Nobara finishes feeling around inside, cleaning out her friend’s cum from your hole. The hot water was enough to wash most of it away, the slimy feeling was just something you almost couldn’t bring yourself to just scoop out.  Maki’s lightly circling the loofa around your back, avoiding the bruised spots until she can help it. Her touch was so nice you thought, but this was getting too much for you. 

She had her fingers spreading you open while the bubbles from your shoulders come down and create a soapy sight. 

The shorter girls eyes looked at you with despair, her older classman who would do anything by themselves is needing two of their closest friends to wash them after an assault. She thought she would see one of y’all die before a man could lay their hands on either of you. She pulls her hand away, wiping the slime onto her leg to get washed off. She just wanted to get you out of this haze, and didn’t know what else to do but lean forward, and gently start to kiss you.

You don’t know if it was from guilt of not being able to help, and this was her way of healing, maybe she liked you for a while and this is her chance or her feelings are overflowing after seeing such an event, but either way, Nobara Kugisaki, your underclassman of a year was semi naked and wet, kissing you in the shower. 

Maki on the other hand, was trying to keep you both up. She noticed Nobara trying to soothe you since they had to invade your space, and she let her hand go back down. Using two fingers to search for any remains of Yuuji/Sukuna in you, she wipes away the last bits she found and let it run. She was about to stop when Nobara’s hand shot out and grabbed Maki. Her eyes told her to go back to what she was doing before, saying how you were gasping while kissing Nobi. 

She wants you to actually feel good, and have your last orgasm be less traumatic, so they were gong to help you with that before bed. They weren’t going to let your rapist be the last person to touch you, much less be the last person you think about. They’re here for you, and they were going to help you cum.

Maki’s long fingers graced the line on your back before tracing the sides of your hips. Your lips were still locked with Nobara’s your hands finding energy enough to cup at her face gingerly. You could feel her silently speaking to Maki and you didn’t care what was going on now. The weed was hitting, the steam from the shower was creating an even dizzier environment and your anxieties were washed away with the cum that stained you. 

Her steady pumping brought a blush to your face, not that your body was already red from the scorching hot water. You were honestly glad women were helping you as it would probably end u into a second panic if you were to have “woken up” in a scene like this. Her fingers were more than enough, and having to kiss your mutual friend altogether, semi to fully naked, all cramped up in this shower stall? The realization had you cum around maki’s fingers and groaning into Nobara’s mouth, they had to hold you up as your orgasm knocked out your knees from under you.

Maki wiggles her fingers, pressing on your sweet spot, drawing your orgasm to a crescendo as she soothes you by kissing the back of your neck. Nobi’s lightly kissing at your chest and collarbone, keeping u balanced and letting you ride out the feeling as long as they could keep it. As you shook in their arms, you panted out as the feeling started to fade, now being able to stand on your own. It’s been a few hours since you’ve found your head again, and it pained you to see your girls were crying. 

You con’t know if it was the whole time, but their eyes were red and pleading for your forgiveness. “I’m sorry.” They sob. “I’m so sorry.” 

#jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen #jjk #jjk x you #x reader #dark jjk #tw #tw dark content #taaotjjk #taaottw #tw dark content jjk #maki zenin x reader #maki zenin #nobara kugisaki #jjk nobara #jujutsu kaisen nobara #nobamaki #jjk maki #maki x reader #maki x you #maki x nobara #nobara x reader #nobara x you #nobara x maki

[nanamiscocksleeve]

Werewolf! Omega! Nanami Headcanons

Can't stop thinking about Omega! Nanami and how sweet and needy he would with his alpha....

🐾Omega! Nanami who craves to be bonded and have an exclusive relationship with an alpha

🐾Omega! Nanami who smells so wonderful that you can't resist wanting to breed with him, an intoxicating smell of pine and amber coming from his scent glands

🐾Omega! Nanami who submissively offers his neck to you so that you can put your mating mark on him. He wants everyone to know he's taken.

🐾Omega! Nanami who is so grateful when you let him mark you back, because he's so fucking sweet and does all the things a perfect omega should do that you can't help but want to be bonded to him. He runs his nose along your scent glands as he bites down, feeling like he might go into heat from the scent alone.

🐾Omega! Nanami who is so snuggly and cuddly and warm that you never want to sleep away from him. You inner alpha instincts want to protect him and let him know he is safe and that no one can take him from you. He belongs in your bed by your side and that's where he's expected to sleep for the rest of his life.

🐾Omega! Nanami who gets shy when he goes into heat, that haze of sexual need falling over him but looks at you with with such needy eyes. How could you resist him when you smell his heat? Of course it sends you into a rut.

🐾Omega! Nanami who whimpers and makes a nest of all your clothes and soft belongings as his heat gets stronger, humping against the pillows of your shared bed, cock painful from arousal and the need to mate with you, hoping you'll come to him soon and breed with him.

🐾Omega! Nanami who you catch in the act of humping your pillow and the sight sends you into an immediate rut. You lick his scent glands and send him into a frenzy as he whimpers helplessly under you, now rocking his erection against your thigh as you kiss him aggressively, resisting the urge to overpower him. You want to be so rough and mark him up all over but he's still your sweet little omega and you would never want to hurt him.

🐾Omega! Nanami who asks so nicely if you will fuck him. The soft way he begs makes your heart clench and your clit throb with pleasure at the thought. You make him eat you out first though, that long tongue flicking against your clit making you see stars as you almost howl with pleasure, your own rut making it hard to think straight. You cum fast, and his mouth laps up all the juices, feeling himself starting to succumb to his own heat and need to be in you.

🐾Omega! Nanami who whines and whimpers so prettily as you finally gift him your pussy, slipping his cock into your wetness. He pathetically moves his hips, movements already sloppy as he mutters praises to you. "thank you for breeding with me thank you I love you your so good to me my cock feels so good thank you thank you thank you..." he moans as he fucks into you

🐾Omega! Nanami, who you pull close as the both of you breed, telling him you love him, that you'll always be his alpha exclusively, wiping away the tears that form in his eyes from the intensity of his heat, nuzzling and biting his neck as he continues to fuck into you. "thank you for letting me fuck you," he whimpers so pathetically that it makes your pussy clench around him as he hits your g-spot so perfectly.

🐾Omega! Nanami who asks permission as he feels himself about to knot. "gonna knot soon... Is that OK?" he asks brokenly, trying to talk in between his thrusting. You kiss him so sweetly because he looks fucking adorable, his face red and sweaty as he tries to control his natural impulses. "Yes my sweet omega... Gonna knot me? Fill me up with your pups? Because I want them baby..." He'll cum so hard, thick spurts of it coating your womb as he orgasms, then a soft sigh of relief as the knot forms, keeping your bodies together.

🐾Omega! Nanami who cuddles into you once the knot has formed, feeling so secure and loved by his alpha's presence. "was that good?" he asks, needing the reassurance. You kiss him deeply and pet him. "So fucking good my love. Let's just keep going till we can't no more hmm?"

#nanami kento #nanami kento smut #nanami kento fluff #nanami kento x reader smut #nanami kento x reader #nanami kento x you #omegaverse #omegaverse nanami #omega!nanami #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen smut #jjk smut #jjk x reader smut #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader smut #banners by cafekitsune

[tartsinarat]

Here’s the boi in his 10000/10 human cosplay

fun fact at some point he had cut his hair because it became too long and hard to deal with but ended up giving himself the worst hair cut ever and decided he liked it despite everyone being like “are you sure you don’t want it slightly more even?” When I did the drawing of him in his cursed form I did it with this hair cut in mind

Originally when walking around the human realm Pip would hide his scars/eye colour by either covering them up or with illusion magic but he’s gotten to the point has lost every fuck he has to give because people already find him off putting and uncanny anyways.

He also started working at the GHS museum as an assistant curator because he’s interested mostly in finding out wtf was the deal of Caleb, Evelyn and Philip, as well as to find any knowledge he can on the portal door but he also does it because he likes sneaking the money he gets paid into Camila’s purse as a repayment for everything because she didn’t accept it when he tried to give it to her upfront because even though she really appreciated it she didn’t want Pip to feel as if he’s in debt but Pip was too stubborn and just decided to do it the sneaky way, Camila knows this and is playing a 4d chess game where she uses his money to get things she thinks he would buy himself and then gives it to him as presents.

Also Ngl Pip hates his job with a passion because Jacob just assumes that because Pip doesn’t talk much but is somewhat neutral on him that it’s an invitation to start randomly spew out conspiracy theories every time he sees Pip but because Pip honestly doesn’t have enough knowledge on humans and their culture, he doesn’t know that Jacob is crazy so he just puts up with it and is just like “huh neat, the human government is full of extraterrestrial lizards? What a delightful government :)” much to Jacob’s dismay.

But Pip doesn’t really start hating Jacob with a passion until Jacob shows him the video of Vee almost getting dissected and Pip almost losses his shit and has to drag himself away from mauling Jacob because at that point Pip and Vee have bonded enough through their similar backgrounds of being horrific magic experiments as well as just spending time together that Pip already considers them another younger sibling.

The colours he’s wearing in the first ref picture sure look familiar and may or may not be hinting something traumatic that’s going to happen :)

#the owl house #original character #toh #toh au #golden heir au #the owl house au #art #oc #owl house au #oc stuff #philip wittebane #belos

[ilovewriting06]

Mischief and Angel- Part 12

A/n: Be prepared for some angry Stiles because our boy is pissed! And doesn't he just love taking people by surprise, because he sure as hell does this chapter.

As a warning this is pretty graphic! There is a lot of blood and torture and it gets pretty bad there for a second so proceed with caution! If you don't want to read it, message me and I can give you the summary of what happens!!

---------------------------------------------------------------------

I whimper as the burning in my abdomen gets worse when my arms are chained above my head. I hear a chuckle as my wrists are locked in place, "Poor little thing. Really is a pity, I liked you, you were real feisty."

I let out a small growl as I stare into the sadistic brown eyes of Kate, "What do you want from me?"

She steps back until she's leaning against a table and I can feel the blood drain from my face at what's sitting beside her. She raises an eyebrow before glancing down and when she looks back at me, she's smirking, "I'm sure you remember this from our last meeting, don't you?"

My eyes widen as it finally registers what I'm chained to, a metal wall coated in wolfsbane, oh God not again. I can feel my muscles strain as they tug against the wolfsbane laced cuffs as Kate snorts out a laugh, "You know, last time I was here it was with Derek. It was quite a relaxing time, almost as nice as our last meeting. I plan to one up that one, aren't you excited?"

I try to swallow down my nerves as I do the only thing I can think of, "Go to hell."

She fakes a pout before sighing, "Well, that wasn't very nice."

She pushes herself off the table before pushing the table a little closer, obviously giving me a clear view of what's on the itinerary for today. I close my eyes as her fingers dance across the device in her hands before I let our a mix between a sob and scream as 900,000 volts of electricity flows through my body, but somehow, it doesn't hurt as much as it did before. I feel my fangs and claws protrude as my eyes glow their beta gold before a wave of worry, comfort, and pain flows through my body and I whimper the only thing on my mind, "Stiles."

--------------------------------------------------------------

Stiles' POV

"JESUS! FUCK!"

I grind me teeth together as I tangle my fingers through my hair and curl into myself, "Oh God, how is she still conscious?!"

"She's a werewolf."

I glance up and glare at Deaton, "No shit sherlock, I had not fucking clue!"

Deaton at least has the decency to grimace a little bit, "If you can feel her pain it means you are taking some of it from her."

My eyes widen, "Some? Some?! This is some?! She's in more pain that this?!"

He grimly nods, "I'm afraid she is enduring roughly 13x what you are experiencing at the moment."

I let out another groan of pain, this time it feels like something sharp is dragging across my ribs. I squeeze my eyes together before silently thinking about what to do. If this isn't even close to what she's feeling I can only imagine just how deep that cut was and it pisses me off that someone thinks they can do this to her. She's a literal angel, she would never hurt someone without a reason yet she's being tortured for seemingly no reason. We don't have anything they would want, no secrets, no information, no powerful amulets, or-wait, "Powerful."

I look up to see everyone looking at me in concern like I'm losing my mind before I force my way through the still sharp, dragging pain that is now on my thigh. I send more comfort and love down the bond before straightening my posture, "Power, they have no idea about me."

I'm met by empty stares before rolling my eyes, "They don't know I'm a spark, they don't know Y/n and I are mated."

Lydia's eyes light up when she understands what I'm saying but Erica raises an eyebrow, "Uh, can't they see the whole impression of teeth on your guy's throats?"

I smirk and shake my head as Lydia answers, "They can't see it."

Everyone except Lydia and Deaton look confused so I run my fingers through my hair one more time before explaining, "They aren't supernatural, which means they can't see the mating bite. Yes, they can see a scar, but to non supernatural creatures it just looks like a normal run of the mill scar. Everyone in this room can see it as the mating bite because they are somehow directly involved in the supernatural, except Dad and Melissa."

They all nod before Scott furrows his eyebrows, "Won't they get suspicious that she has a scar? She's a werewolf so she would have healed."

I nod before sighing, "Well considering what they're doing to her right now I don't think a scar is going to look that out of place at the moment."

As if on cue I gasp as something is stabbed through Y/n's thigh, "I swear to God, I'm going to kill them for doing this to her!"

I make eye contact with Scott letting him know I'm being serious and I'm surprised at the nod I receive, "I know."

I feel my eyes glow as determination and anger courses through my veins, if they think they can get away with hurting my mate, my Angel, they've got one hell of surprise coming their way.

--------------------------------------------------------------

Y/n's POV

I take deep desperate gasps for air as Kate pulls the knife out of my thigh and sets it on the table, "Why are you doing this? What do you want?"

I glance down as blood pours down my leg before looking at Kate as she speaks, "Well first of all, it's really, really fun. Second of all, you're a werewolf, and lastly, you killed me!"

I lick my chapped lips before speaking, "Clearly I need to redefine what being dead means 'cause you sure as hell seem pretty alive to me."

She rolls her eyes before scoffing, "That's because the witch that was working for us at the time revived us. She's the same witch that transferred your precious little Lola, to me."

My eyes widen in surprise as I stutter, "Y-you...Lola..."

She smirks before tapping her nails on the table, "Yes, me. Morning sickness is a bitch, especially when the only thing you want to do is kill the damned thing."

I snarl and make a lunge for her before being stopped by the chains, "If you hurt her I'll kill you."

She snorts, "Please, if I wanted to kill her now she'd already be dead. No, no, see she will die, very soon, but I'm going to make you watch. You and your pathetic little boyfriend."

I growl, "He'll kill you before you even touch her."

"Your little, True Alpha? Really? He doesn't scare me."

I let out a short bark of laughter as I rub my cheek across my bicep hoping to get some of the blood off, "You are such a fucking idiot. I'm not talking about Scott, I'm talking about my fiancée."

She doubles over in laughter as if I just said the funniest thing and I scowl at her. As she slowly recuperates from her laughing fit we're joined by Gerard. I press myself closer to the metal behind me in silent fear as Kate turns to her psychotic father, "You'll never guess what she just said."

I narrow my eyes as she repeats what I said and Gerard himself laughs, "You think we're scared of Stiles? The puny, weak, human?"

I raise an eyebrow before licking my bottom lip, "God, you guys are stupid."

They both glare at me and this time Gerard is the one to step up to their trusty table of toys. As his eyes flick over the blood covered options he speaks, "As my daughter may have mentioned, you never did miscarry, your daughter was just moved from one womb to the other. You should thank Kate really, carried the mutt for eight months and gave you a chance to meet her."

My eyes flash as I growl, "I would have got to meet her if you would have just left us alone! She's my daughter, my baby, and you stole her from me, from us. You never gave us the chance to get to know her as a baby, to get that special bonding time, watch her grow, and because of that I'm going to watch as he breaks every bone in your body and then leaves you out to rot."

Kate snorts again but otherwise remains silent as Gerard seemingly decides on a knife, a knife that he drenches in wolfsbane so strong that it's burning my nose and making my dizziness worse. I gulp as he turns and looks at me, "We were hoping to deter you from procreating, but it appears that you still plan to, don't you?"

I watch warily as he steps closer before he chuckles, "We can't have that, so I'm going to take that ability from you."

My eyes widen as I press myself back as far as I can go before whimpering, "Please, don't, please. Just kill me, you already said that's what you're going to do, just kill me!"

He hums before shrugging one shoulder, "I've changed my mind, if you survive this, you get to live."

For the first time since this started I let my emotions show as tears begin to fall and I beg, "Please don't do this! Just kill me! Anything but this, please!"

All my begging does is make both of them smirk as Gerard makes his way over, "And if you survive this, I'll make sure to end your little human in front of you so you know you really are left with nothing."

Instead of more crying and begging, I'm overcame by an anger so strong I'm literally seeing red and Lily bares her fangs and crouches, ready to pounce. As Gerard gets in arms length I do what wolves do best, I howl.

Gerard stumbles slightly from the noise before grunting, "Shut up, they won't hear you down here."

I snarl before screaming as the knife is plunged through my flesh. I squeeze my eyes shut, pushing past the pain as Lily pushed her way to the surface. I start to fight her for control but the knife is pulled down and I back down, giving her control.

As my energy is renewed my hands wrap around the chains holding my arms up before pulling my legs up and kicking Gerard as hard as I can, sending him across the room. As he hits the ground Kate grabs her gun off the table and points it at me, "Don't move or I'll shoot you."

I snarl before looking down as the knife that had been embedded in my skin falls to the ground sending a ring throughout the dingy, dark room. I watch as the puddle of blood below my gets bigger by the second and the energy within me starts to leave just as fast.

I wheeze, struggling to breath before perking up as I hear the spastic heartbeat that I could pick out of a crowd of a million people. At the sound of our mate, Lily retreats and I sag as all my energy goes with her, before looking at Kate, "My mates here."

Kate furrows her eyebrows in confusion before the door that had once been on hinges falls to the floor and I can't help but use the little bit of energy I have left to smirk, "No witch will bring you back this time, bitch."

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Stiles' POV

I groan slightly in pain before shaking it off and trying to focus. I close my eyes again and focus on the mate bond looking for someway to find Y/n. After another minute I open my eyes and glare at Deaton, "It isn't working."

He sighs as if he's been over this a hundred times before speaking, "You have to want it Stiles!"

"Want it?! Deaton it's all I fucking want right now!"

"Then believe, will it into existence."

I grit my jaw before closing my eyes and focusing back on the bond, alright Stiles, focus, this is your mate and she's in pain, and she's scared and they're probably going to kill her if you don't find her so fucking focus!

My eyes fly open as I jump off the couch, "I've got it but we have to go, now! Right now, move before I leave you all here!"

-------------------------------------------------------------

As soon as we're in the building I can feel that she's close. It's like a buzzing itch under my skin but this place is fucking huge and I have no idea where to start. There are so many different scents that the wolves can't pick out her scent.

I tap my fingers as nervous energy flows through my body when a pained and angry howl shakes the building and then the wolves are running through the halls like they have a fricking map of it engrained into their brains.

Me and all the others that aren't enhanced with super speed and super hearing sprint to keep up with them, winding through halls and descending two different staircases before we come to a stop in front of a strong metal door. I push my way through the wolves and lay my hand on the door willing the stupid thing to just fall off the hinges, and I'll be damned it did just that.

I step through the door as Kate spins around and I notice that Gerard is trying to get up off the ground. My eyes dart around the room to make sure that they're the only two here before finally letting my eyes fall on Y/n.

I suck in air as I look at the blood, the cuts, and the bruises covering her body that still haven't healed and from the looks of it they won't be healing for awhile because of the fucking wolfsbane.

Her eyes snap up to meet mine and she smiles a weak smile, "I knew you'd come, Mischief."

I sigh in relief at the fact she's aware enough to speak as I answer, "Always, Angel."

She responds with a smile and I can feel her love and relief before glancing at the others, "Get her, I'll deal with these two."

Once Scott, Allison, Lydia, and Kira run towards Y/n, I turn my eyes to the two psychos in front of me, "Now, I'm going to break every fucking bone in your body," the room is filled with loud snaps and wails of pain as they slump to the ground, "I'm going to make you feel the pain she's in," the room is filled with pained screams as I will Y/n's pain onto them, before squaring my shoulders, "And now I'm condemning you to eternal death with no chance of being resurrected, and finally, I'm going to kill you for what you did to my mate."

Gerard's eyes widen as he heaves, "You're a spark, and you're mated."

I smirk, "Damn right grandpa, two rarities wrapped up in lil' ole me."

They watch me with wide eyes as I raise my hand before snapping my fingers and watching as they turn to dust. Holy shit! I totally just Tony Starked those suckers! I guess watching Avengers last night influenced my techniques.

I feel all the power recede back to my chest as Scott calls, "Stiles, get over here!"

I feel the blood drain from my face as I rush over to where Scott is holding Y/n on the floor. I sink to my knees and pull her towards me as Scott looks at me with tear filled eyes, "Her heart is weak. We need to get her to Deaton."

I glance down at her face taking in all of her features and how she looks peaceful before nodding, "She's out cold, so she won't feel it but we need to go. I can feel the bond getting weaker."

My voice waivers and cracks on the last sentence as Scott picks her up and heads towards the door. I follow close behind begging any force or deity that's out there, please don't let her die, please.

------------------------------------------------------------

A/n- Um...so that happened and I totally only cried a little bit when I proofread it (don't be surprised if there are some mistakes, my eyes were a little blurry). Let me know what you think is going to happen and if you have any suggestions for what you want to happen!

Tag List: @ah-blossom @gabby988 @zanypaintermoon

#stiles stilinski #teen wolf #dylan o’brien #scott mccall #stiles stilinksi x reader #dylan o’brien x reader #allison argent #stiles x reader #isaac lahey #lydia martin #kira yukimura #mischief and angel #sheriff stilinski #melissa mccall #erica reyes #vernon boyd #derek hale

[pit-and-the-pen]

My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys

A/N: Part Two to Requited Love

I know people have been waiting for this. And the poll is still active but I couldn’t wait any longer. There are two endings and this is the unofficial (in terms of my ongoing Sunbeam series) Azriel ending but… just bare with me

Read the other ending Here

Warnings: Angst, Hurt/Comfort , implied smut (not with Az)

WC:4.4 K

divider by @cafekitsune

The next morning I was in Rhys office. He barely even looked up from the paper strewn over his desk before I spoke. 

“I’m going back home.” 

He sighed, leaning back into his chair. His eyes raked over me, “Does this have anything to do with why Azriel was so huffy this morning?” His eyebrow raised and I felt the anger I’d been trying to quell since last night rise its head up like a sleeping dragon.

“Fuck off. Let him be mad if he wants to be mad.” I snapped. 

“Mad isn’t exactly how I would put it,” He paused looking at me. “What happened?” The High Lord questioned. I sighed not having the strength to recount the events from last night. 

“Nothing but the inevitable.” he frowned at my non-answer but didn’t press any harder. 

“I’ll miss you. We all will.” He said finally. I nodded. 

“You all should visit.” Not an I’ll visit. No. If I could avoid it I would never step foot into this miserable court ever again. 

I was gone by mid-morning. Mor had helped me winnow the things I wanted to take with me. What they did with the rest wasn’t any of my concern. Rhys or Feyre had bought it all for me anyways, let them decide what to do with their money. 

Once I had gotten settled into my room, I hugged Mor goodbye and thanked her for her help. She just gave me a tighter hug and told me she would visit soon. 

It was two weeks before I could see Helion.Two weeks of settling back into my court that I loved so dearly. Helion

 He was visiting Dawn court for some trade agreement that needed to be signed. I came by every day, asking if he’d returned you. His second would just silently shake her head at me. And I would stomp back to my room like an angry babe. 

Two weeks of checking before I finally saw her nod her head and I had to stop myself from running into Helions office. I had the control to at least knock on the door but not much else. I quickly shut the door behind me as he called me in. 

“Sunbeam!” He called out when saw my face. “I had hoped the rumors of you moving back home were true.” He walked around the desk and gave me a brisk hug. Very out of character for him. 

“You’re not an easy man to schedule an appointment with, Helion.” I smiled warmly at the High Lord of my court. 

“If you wanted a piece of me, you only had to say the words and I would have come running darling.” There's the flirt I remember. I thought, rolling my eyes.

“But judging by your urgency in requesting a meeting that my second expressed to me, I’m going to assume that’s not what you wanted to see me for.”

My smile dropped as I braced myself for the question I needed to ask him.

“I need you to break a mating bond”

His mouth fell open. For once in my life, Helion was speechless. “I don’t know if I can even do that. Are you sure that’s what you want?” His eyes saw right through me. I threw my head back, a sad laugh bubbling past my lips. 

“Yes. No. Gods I don’t know. I just don’t want it to hurt like this forever.” I felt treacherous tears starting to fall down my face. Helion grabbed my arms gently before I could wipe them away. 

“I know you well enough to know that you don’t run away from hard things.” He held me against his chest as I really started to sob. 

“Helion. Every second that I’m away from him it kills me. I’m over here dying inside over some male who only ever saw me as a second option.” 

“Then he’s an idiot. But the mother still saw fit to make you two mates. Give it some more thought, you’re clearly still not fully decided. I’ll do some research to see if it’s even possible and if you still want to, I’ll be here to help.” I nodded my thanks into his shirt. He takes my head between his hands and uses his thumbs to wipe the tears still streaking down my face. He gives me a gentle kiss on the top of my head before I walk out of the room. 

Helion was powerful, but apparently not powerful enough to break a mating bond. Many had tried but no one had ever successfully achieved it without one or both parties dying. As much as I resented Azriel, I didn’t want to kill him, nor myself to be rid of him. So I would just keep ignoring that little golden feeling in my chest, the feeling that seemed to be growing more everyday. 

I fell into a familiar routine back in the Day Court. I took up my old job as a researcher. My days were spent surrounded by the massive libraries of my home court. People would come to us with questions and it was our job to use the knowledge at our disposal to find them answers. It kept me busy at the very least, but I did have to admit that I love doing it. I felt more useful here than I ever had at the Night Court. Pangs of sadness would rip through me when someone snarked in a way that made me think of Cassian. When someone would smirk and I could only picture Rhysand standing in front of me as he beat me in chess. The art was so beautiful that I longed to show Feyre if only to see that twinkle in eye as she dissected the colors and shading used. 

Worst of all, I truly did miss Azriel. Time had given my anger less of an edge. Thinking of him didn’t hurt the way it once had. Didn’t have me spiraling in on myself until I was nothing more than sobs. I still wasn’t ready to forgive him but I wasn’t angry anymore and that had to count for something right? And it had nothing with the small feelings I would occasionally receive from the other end of the bond. I don’t know if he was consciously doing it or if it was purely because of the depth of the emotions he felt. 

I stopped looking for ways to sever the bond between us. Content with just letting it sit unreturned in my chest for the rest of my very long life. 

Someone calling my name pulled me from my musing. One of the messengers, Dia, smiled brightly up at me. “Hey sunbeam. Helion asked me to deliver this to you.” I took the golden envelope from her. I thanked her and she turned around, leaving me back to my books. 

I slid my finger under the seal and pulled out the letter. He was flirty even in a letter. He had requested that I accompany him to the latest ball he was hosting. Helion, ever the charmer, even placed boxes for me to check yes or no. I giggled to myself at the juvenile nature of it, but checked yes with the quill sitting next to me. 

The ball was just a few days away and I was so excited as dress after dress were brought into my room for me to try on. The one that ended up catching my eye was a floor length glossimer dress, such a pale golden color it looked almost like sunlight itself. The bottom was dyed a light pink color that flowed into it seamlessly. It took my breath away as the last button snapped into place. It fit like a glove and I knew instantly this was the dress I had to wear. 

Facing the mirror, I was blown away by the person standing in front of me. I didn’t recognize her. My hair was pinned up into a flowing updo at the base of my neck. I caught eyes in the mirror and whirled around to see Helion racking his eyes over my figure.

He let out a low whistle and I blushed, adjusting my tiara. I walked over to him and he held out his hand for me, twirling me around dramatically when I took it. “No one will be able to take their eyes off of you, Sunbeam.” His eyes hungirly raked over me, “If you ever reconsider my offer. I would take you to bed in a heartbeat. Just say the words.” I pushed his shoulder, I didn’t doubt his words. 

“Keep your pants on Helion. We have a ball to get to.” 

“I’m High Lord. I can be late.” His pupils had dilated and I rolled my eyes, pushing him out the door before I linked my arm into his. 

The ball was as lavish as I had expected. There was much to celebrate and this was mostly to welcome the new High Lord. Eris. Beron had finally died a few months back and Eris had officially stepped into the role with grace. The autumn court once known for its cruelty seemed to be taking a new direction and as I talked to nobility from the court, it was for the better. I had gotten to know him over the years, his frequent visits to the Night Court, plus a few flirty exchanges that I always brushed off, while he was helping us during the war softened me to him. Learning the true events of that night with Mor. 

I locked eyes with Eris across the room. He had been heartbreakingly handsome when he was just High Fae but as a High Lord? His hair had grown slightly longer, just touching his shoulders. Dressed in a deep maroon suit that showed off every single one of his muscles. The permanent scowl that had been etched into his face had been replaced with a smile that radiated comfort. My feet seemed to move without deciding to. Eris kept his eyes locked onto mine as I got closer. My cheeks heated up under his intense stare. 

“Hi little sunbeam,” Honeyed words wrapped around me. “Seems like you’re no longer hiding in the shadows.” He held out his hand, eyes flickering to the dance floor. I smiled up at him and gently placed my hand in his. 

His touch was firm and the warmth of his power radiated off of him. He clutched my waist, pulling me flush to his front. I felt every plane of his toned body pressed against me and goosebumps broke out across my skin having nothing to do with the temperature in the room. The two of us gilded across the floor. I could feel the eyes of the room on us but I only had eyes for the male in front of me. 

“If I had known you danced this good, I would have pulled you out of that miserable court a long time ago.” He spoke into the shell of my ear.  “I’ll never understand what the Shadowslinger was thinking, even I could smell the mating bond on you. Plus, one look at me with those beautiful doe eyes and I would have been putty in your hands.” He nipped at my earlobe and I felt it deep in my stomach. But I couldn’t help that twinge in my gut that made this feel wrong. Even with all of him pressed up against me. Eris would only have to say the words and any fae in Prythian would be on their knees before them. Even I had to admit he was devastatingly handsome. So I fought against that little voice screaming at me and leaned into his touch more. 

Before I knew what had happened, I felt Eris’ warmth leave me. I shuddered at the new chill in the air. When I looked around, I saw shadows wrapped around my torso, lovingly coiled around my waist. I almost smiled at their weight. 

“Keep your hands off of her.” Azriel growled at the High Lord woh did nothing but smirk at me as I was pulled from the room onto a balcony just outside the ballroom. 

 “You had no right!” I screeched at him, wrenching my arm from his grasp. Anger seethed through me. I felt my palms heat up from the light trying to escape from them. He went to grab my arm and I ripped it back from his reach. “Don’t you fucking dare.” 

“Please.” Was all he said and suddenly it was like that night all over again. Me pouring my heart out and all he could say was please. 

“Please what, Azriel? Is that all you know how to do, beg and plead. For what? Was breaking my heart once not enough for you.” 

“Gods. What do you want me to say?” He ran his hands through his hair. He looked like he was about to lose it. Good. “Do you want to hear how I was fucking terrified. How any good thing that I had ever received had been taken away from me? That when I felt that twinge in my chest, that I knew what it meant but prayed to the gods that it wasn’t that.” I went to start in on him again. “No. Not because of that, because I knew that you were the one person who could utterly destroy me. Mor was a pass time. She was convenient and it would have made sense for us to be together in some capacity. Then Elain showed up. I saw so much of her in you, she was sweet and kind but she wasn’t you. Looking back, I don’t even know why I was so hung up on her. I’m not saying I wasn’t stupid because I was and I said some awful things to you. I said them because I knew that was the only thing that would get you to realize I would never deserve you.” 

“Stop. Just stop. I’m sure you’ve rehearsed this all before but do you actually think I’m stupid enough to believe it?” I spit out between my teeth. 

“No. I don’t think you’re stupid at all. The exact opposite. Yet for some reason you never ended up breaking the bond. Which would have been the smart thing to do. You deserve that, I deserved that.” 

That made me pause. “How did you…Did Helion tell you?” Angry at the idea of Helion running to Azriel with that information. 

“Helion told Rhys who passed it on to me. Rhys explained what would most likely happen if you decided to break it and before he could tell Helion he had lost his mind, I told him if that’s what you wanted to do I would accept that.” He said plainly. A part of me knew he was telling the truth. 

“Don’t be stupid. You would have died if I broke the bond. It wasn’t the same as rejecting it. That type of magic broke the very part of you it formed to.” I couldn’t believe the words coming out of his mouth right now. 

“I know. And I figured that if you were in enough pain to take that risk, to risk you dying, then I should be willing to risk it for a situation I had put us both in.” My mind was reeling at his words.

“That night..” I started, he interrupted me.

“I said the most vile things I could think of. I panicked when you told me about the bond. If you could feel it too, I knew nothing good could have come from that so I pushed you away.” I shook my head, as if I could shake his words away from my ears. 

“You seemed so shocked when I told you.” 

His head sunk down, voice small “I was shocked because no part of me believed, believes, that I deserve you in that way.” When he stepped forward, I didn’t step away. Mind too busy catching up with his words. “Please say something. “ 

I turned my eyes up to look at him. Hazel eyes soft sparkling with unshed tears. I wanted to rip into him. I truly did. Some sick part of me wanted to make him hurt like he had hurt me but I know that wouldn’t fix anything here. 

“You don’t get to do this to me. You don’t get to say all the right things and just have me forgive you. You don’t get to say that you love me after everything you did.” He sighed. Leaning his head on top of mine. I frowned at the contact, but didn’t push him away, refusing to melt into him. “Whatever your reason. You said all those things that you knew would hurt me, you said them and some part of you had to believe them.” 

“I know. There isn’t a day that I don’t regret everything that I said, everything I had put you through over all those years. I took you for granted and I didn’t realize how much I loved you until you were gone.” I wanted to push him back but something in me let his words sink into my bones. Because the moment I looked into his eyes I felt the other side of the bond snap into place. I gasped at the feeling I had spent so long ignoring. The bond seemed to sing in the air around us. My own sunlight flickering under my palms as I felt the sincerity of his words pump through the bond. The feeling was foreign but warm. It wrapped around me like a blanket, soothing my tense muscles. I didn’t realize how much the empty bond had been weighing on my shoulders. 

“You know this doesn’t change anything.” Was all I said and as he looked at me again, I knew that was a lie. “We can’t start over. There's no way to take back everything you said, everything you did” I said once I regained my ability to talk. His face sank completely.”I won’t break the bond. But I’m not accepting it either.” I ignored that kernel of hope I felt from him. 

“I’ll wait as long as it takes.” He leaned closer to me, taking my face in his hands. I didn’t fight him as he tilted my head up to meet his eyes. His eyes flickered to my lips but he just pressed a chaste kiss to the top of my head “I would cut off my own wings if you said it would make you happy.” He swore. A shudder racked through at the sincerity in his words. I pushed out of grasp and walked back down to the ball still in full swing. 

--------------------------

A strong pair of arms wrapped tighter around me as I started to rouse from my dreams. I snuggled deeper into the blankets tucked around me and laughed at the hand starting to creep higher up my naked chest. Rolling over I was met with baby blue eyes. Sol smirked at me as I stopped his wandering hands. “Was last night not enough for you?” I joked and he beamed at me. He rolled me over so I was underneath him

“How could I ever get enough of you?” He started kissing a trail down my neck and I groaned as a rush of desire flooded my veins. Ignoring the tug of anger that followed it. I hooked my leg around Sol’s waist and pulled him down to me. 

I smiled as I walked into work, willing the flush in my cheeks to tame itself as I settled amongst the books still sprawled across my desk. 

“Busy morning?” Aurora said, covering her mouth as she tried to hide her smile. 

“Very.” I returned, laughing at her faux scandalized look. 

“I don’t know how you manage to pull yourself away from him. If that was me I would ri-” 

“Aurora!” I chastised her. Smacking her arm playfully. My mind drifted off to the activities this morning. While we weren’t official, it had become a recurring event of Sol and I waking up tangled in my sheets. I was lucky to get out of the door on time those mornings. He kept pushing for something more solid. But some nagging part of me just couldn’t do it. I hated the idea of leading him, and that wasn’t my intention when this all started. He had caught my eye after that conversation with Azriel at the ball and it took one flirty joke before my lips were crashing against his. 

Sol was sweet and kind. He had been patient with me as I sorted out all of my own shit. Never giving me push back when I shut down the conversation of what exactly I wanted from this. Which I truthfully didn’t ever have an answer for. He put up with me pulling him into my bed night after night but I knew eventually he was going to grow tired of this arrangement. My stomach churned at the thought of now spoiled memories of his hands roaming over my body. I sighed, laying my head against my desk. Letting the cool wood calm my nerves. 

It came later than I had expected it, honestly. He was kinder than I deserved for the months I had led him on. His mate. I could laugh at the irony. But I wished him well with one last searing kiss and that was that. I truly did want the best for him, and I knew that wasn’t me. Not at my current state. 

I retreated into myself after that. Maybe there's something wrong with me. It was hard to keep those thoughts at bay. Everyone always found better things than me. Always the second choice. Those words I had spilled to Azriel had  come from the deepest part of my soul. All the cruel things he said to me were replaying in a loop until I felt tears spilling down my face. 

A frantic knock at my door pulled me from my despair. I didn’t even have time to wipe away the tears before I saw Helion standing in my doorway. His face held none of his usual charm. No, standing before me was Helion, not the playboy but the High Lord. 

“It’s Rhys.” That was all he had to say for me to take off sprinting along the halls. Helion could barely keep up with me and I wretched the door to his study open. 

Rhys didn’t so much as look up as I barreled into the office. I reached him and placed a hand on his shoulder.

“What's wrong?” And Rhys just broke in front of me. He explained about Feyre’s pregnancy. The wings that would most likely kill her. I felt my stomach drop to my feet.

“How can I help, Rhys?” I saw the pain in his eyes. 

“Just try to find if this has ever been attempted. Or if there's a way to make this safer for her.” Rhys looked like a shell of himself and I knew I would do whatever I had to do to never see him look so broken ever again. I knew what I needed to do as hard as the words were going to be to get out.

“I’ll come back with you.” He looked like I had grown three heads. “Between my research and healing, I’ll be the next best thing after Helion to help Feyre with this. Please. Let me help her survive this.” His eyes welled with tears as he just nodded. 

“I can’t thank you enough.” He wrapped his arms tightly around me. The laugh that left my lips was tense. 

“Thank me once we save her.”

“Of course. It’s the least I can do after you helped me so much.” I placed a hand over his shaking one. 

I didn’t pack much. Most of which was as many books that Helion could bother parting with. All on various topics, Illyrian anatomy, childbirth and healing. I’d been healing since I was a child. With Madja by my side, even if we couldn’t find a way to safely deliver the baby, we could prevent Feyre from bleeding out. 

Rhys came the next morning to winnow me to the Night Court. I said goodbyes for now to my new friends. Helion had given me a tight hug as he thanked me for doing what he could not. 

Feyre greeted me exuberantly, crushing me against her as well as she could at the bump jutting out from her stomach. She was glowing. From the look of her, she didn’t have too much longer to go and I felt lightheaded at the thought of how much research I had to do in not much time. 

I was standing up on the roof, looking out at the lights of Velaris when I felt him behind me. I didn’t turn around as he joined me near the railing. 

“Thank you for being here. Rhys already seems more comfortable, more like himself.” My nod was the only acknowledgement I gave him that I had heard him. He signed and stayed looking out at the skyline. 

“Look...” He started. I cut him off.

“Don’t do this again, Azriel.” There was no anger in my voice this time. Just the voice of something who was so broken, broken because of this man. “We can’t go back and change the past. We can’t start over and you’ll never be able to undo the pain you caused. “

“Let me try. Please. I’ll spend the rest of my life making it up to you.” His tone was just as raw as mine. And something in me broke. The part that was tired of pretending my feelings went away. I knew deep down in my heart that this was another chance. 

“I don’t know if I’ll be able to love you the way I did before.” I risked a glance over to him and I was blown away by the breathtaking smile that graced his face. 

““I’ll take you any way that you’ll have me” I knew he was telling the truth. It was there under the stars I realized, though it wouldn’t happen over night, loving Azriel would be as easy as breathing.

#acomaf #acosf #acotar #acotar fanfiction #azriel acotar #acowar #azriel x reader #unrequited love #azriel angst #azriel shadowsinger #azriel x you #azriel fanfic #azriel spymaster #yall please dont be mad at me

[thestalwartheart]

Currently obsessed with the thought that it's Q who won't promise monogamy to Bond. He doesn't say it to be cruel. He likes Bond very much. He genuinely enjoys his company over dinner and a glass of wine, which is far more than he can say for many of the men he's slept with. In fact, it's much more than that. Apart from having shagged a couple of times, they've become close friends too.

It's just that with Q's schedule, he's never been very good at long-term committed relationships. His work life has always been too busy for all that. He works odd hours and long shifts, and it's been impossible to make anything monogamous stick. Besides, Bond is out in the field most of the time. He sleeps with other people for work and he has a ridiculously high sex drive for a man his age (speed will do that to you). It's not always going to be possible for Q to meet his needs.

And Bond knows all of that is true. They see each other infrequently as it is. It would hardly be fair of him to cat around while Q remained a saint. Why shouldn't he go on a date and have a good time while Bond is out of the country? Q's there at the drop of a hat whenever Bond needs him--really needs him--so what's the matter with him getting his needs met when Bond's busy? Nothing.

That's what he tells Q, anyway, the minute Q mentions a date.

("Is that a problem?" Q asks, his brow furrowed.

"Of course not," replies Bond gently.)

Except there is a problem. A huge one, as Bond finds out months later, watching Q head off from MI6 on his third date in about six months. Because it stings. Bond has no right to be jealous. He'd slept with 008 in Tokyo only a few nights ago. It was good sex, but it was just sex. He wonders what Q is like when he's with other people; what the sex is like. Is it just sex? Or is it more than that? Does he feel a similar sting when he sees Bond with someone in the field?

Bond doesn't know why he's cursed with wanting monogamy when his life makes it impossible, but it's bloody infuriating that he does.

And it's also bloody infuriating he's managed to fall for a man who doesn't want a bar of it.

#00q #my fic #fic idea brought to you by how soft bond is with vesper when she's still with/getting over someone else #also brought to you by bond's pragmatism when he tells camille that of course it doesn't bother him that she uses her body as a tool #but it's also about what happens when you're so used to protecting yourself from heartbreak (cough Q cough) #because his job and his ambition have fucked up relationships before #and he does NOT want to fuck this up with bond #so better that they keep on keeping on the way they are right? #WRONG #q needs to sit down and realise that this is the first time he's felt so strongly about anyone and it's worth really trying #and bond needs to realise that he deserves to voice his desiress and have them met #today's challenge is vulnerability boys let's give it a go

[irlplasticlamb]

i’m so sorry if i seem a bit off or post less in the next week or so — i just found out my beloved 17 years old soulmate cat got diagnosed with bone cancer and he doesn’t have much time left. he lives in my family home with my parents still whilst i’m abroad so it’s double tough because i can’t be with him. i just need some time to calm down and make my peace with everything

#vic.txt #i’m just so damn sad he’s my most beloved boy i got him when i was fucking 7 #we grew up together i cried with him i laughed with him he’s been my companion my number one boy for my entire life #i know it’s silly like yeah it’s a cat not a human being but we formed such a strong bond #when i had c0vid last year he lied with me all day all night #i love him i love him i’m so fucking mad at the universe he does not deserve this fate #and he’s so old the treatment isn’t really an option #he’s fine now he isn’t in pain but as soon as his cancer progresses he will have to be put down so he doesn’t suffer for nothing #i just want to be with him when that happens i want him to know he’s not alone and that i love him very much #txt #tw: animal death #tw: animal sickness

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

i want nothing more than for Ezra & Thrawn to be not enemies, not friends, but a secret third thing - roommates

#sorry to be star wars posting on main but im star wars posting on main #i just think it would be so fucking funny #if they all get to thrawn and he & ezra are just chillin with space martinis #sabine: where's ezra 🔫>:(🔫 #thrawn: literally just turn your head to the left #but fr though has anyone... Asked if thrawn wants to be Involved??? #maybe hes done. maybe hes retired. #same with ezra #theyre busy stealing each others leftovers and fighting over the thermostat #whatever goes on in the galaxy is none of their business. they have Removed Themselves from the situation #i hope they Genuinely Dislike each other but theyre like... bonded like stray cats now #thats what trans-galactic purrgil travel does to a mf #ultimate roadtrip arc.... #i hope it made them both simultaneously worse and better <3 #i hope ezra does literally anything and thrawn is like 'this fucking kid... (derogatory. annoyed. tired. somehow emotionally attached)' #ahsoka and sabine turn up and thrawn is shoving ezra at them like Please Take Him Back Let Me Have Peace #while ezra is like 'awwww youd miss me too much (malicious. snarky. tired. somehow emotionally attached)' #of course its not gonna go like this. theyre gonna have thrawn be all like 'muahaha finally i have been rescued so that i may be eeeevilll' #not my thrawn but Whatever.... #hes a bad bitch but let him be. let him slay in retirement #and ezra's gonna be this wise jedi sage who's unlocked the secrets of the force blah blah blah #not MY blueberry boy but Whatever.... #i hope he's cloud-surfing with purrgil. living his best life #absolutely unprompted #ahsoka series #WAIT NO I WANT ONE OTHER THING #i need zeb & kallus to be gay married on lira san thankyew <3 #(also for ahsoka's lekku/montrals to be longer but we all know thats not gonna happen....) #(every day i look at live-action shaak ti and sigh) #(at least we get a stellar loth cat animatronic instead of weird cgi <3)

[symbiotic-slime]

would you guys be interested in venom/the magnus archives crossover fan art

#I wanna draw the guys as avatars #also I think it would be a fun challenge to try to make Venom visibly an avatar of the hunt #because they already look like that #but I have ideas for the others :3 #venom #venom comics #venom movies #the magnus archives #I’m going to elaborate in the tags because I can #so Eddie is 100% an avatar of the corruption #and is also the type of guy who willingly became an avatar #he’s so deranged he would be enthralled by the wasp nest in his attic #he would be a victim of the lonely though #like especially comics!Eddie #because his bond with the symbiote is so deep that like. being singular sends him into a depressive spiral #flash is an avatar of the slaughter #but he’s not deranged like Eddie his was more of a result of his situation #like being a bully and then joining the military #very slaughter coded #and yes he’s made up for the bullying so I’m not sure how that would play in?? but he still does have some anger issues #he’s a victim of the web #like one the alcoholism is classic web #and two being manipulated. like the whole agent venom arc where he was essentially being blackmailed by jack olantern #venom is a manifestation of the corruption #an avatar of the hunt #and probably also a victim of the lonely #like I think the idea of being alone as a being who’s whole purpose is to bond and connect with a host would be devastating #recently I think they could probably also be a victim of the desolation given that everyone important to them keeps fucking dying lmao #I’m kinda second guessing myself with flash because he’s just so damn normal like he doesn’t revel in war but I also want to give him one #do any of my followers know both of these. if so please help me out I’m struggling with flash 😭

[a-sketchy]

if the events of persona 4 didn’t happen, if you gave him ten years i think yosuke could’ve become the kind of guy to do fight club. yu is literally his tyler. the degree to which it maps is insane.

#does it map 1:1? absolutely not #does it fit really surprisingly well? i think so #like if yosuke went back to the city without ever have making the bonds he does in p4 #then his issues could have crystallized with him becoming the kind of miserable repressed freak necessary for that story #like. the deep insecurity in his masculinity. the way his repression of his sexuality intertwines with that. the objectification of women. #his averageness. his insecurity in his appearance. his wish for something exciting to happen. #and then his whole tangled up envy/attraction to yu and the way he sees him as a paragon of masculinity. the way he wants to be him. #rank 10 is RIGHT THERE. #yu is his fucking TYLER. #i’m so right about this #regardless i think yosuke would like fight club the movie way too much. he’d see it as aspirational #rambles #yosukeposting #p4g posting