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faetreides · 2 months

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i'd really like to know if he'd have any types of kinks or a type?!!

like from what I've read from you, maybe it's just my impression, but does he find chubby people more attractive? (self-insert hihi)

or just kinks he'd have; like, modern!coryo screams corruption kink (maybe even a virgin!reader 👀), and things like degradation/praise, as well as a pretty big dom situation 👀

anyways, love your stuff!

I can't help coming back to your modern! coryo au literally everyday, I'm in love 🫡🫠

CW: implied-ish plus sized reader but i use “chubbier” so it’s a bit ambiguous i guess but that’s how i picture them, don’t like don’t read

First of all, thank you so much for loving the au, it's kind of getting demotivating a bit to see the fandom slow down but I'll ALWAYS have modern! coryo brain rot. So, I guess someday I'll be shouting into the void lmao.

I do think that when it comes to preferences, he does prefer chubbier people. He's one of those guys that likes being able to just really grab and slap anything and everything because you've got more than enough meat on your bones. Also, idk how to quite explain it, but I think he enjoys what he believes is a more realistic (?) body, like he'd deadass get so offended if you thought you had to shave or cover up stretch marks. He comes from a very superficial world where the beauty standards are impossible to achieve (edit: i’m NOT talking about being skinny being impossible, i’m talking about general beauty standards and having an unrealistically proportioned body like the ones in media, i’m aware that skinny people exist) . It's like how for a while, Aphrodite and other similar goddesses were depicted in media as very skinny but when you look back at how they were actually worshiped, there are statues and carvings and etc. with belly rolls and all kinds of versions of bigger bodies. That's what reader's body reminds him of, gets him feel closer to God and all that.

I'll get to some actual kinks in a second, but I do think he likes more of a reluctant person. He's someone that is built for the chase and that really revels in the wooing process, he'd never been in love before you, so the rush of intense feelings kicks his adrenaline into overdrive. It's a sort of predator/prey thing without being a full-blown kink, Coryo stalks and he circles around you until you're given such a small window of escape that you already missed your chance by the time he decides that he's done waiting around. You have the whole cutesy 'will they? won't they?' thing going for a bit until you just don't anymore.

In my head, modern!coryo's reader is a virgin for that exact purpose lol like he does have a fuck boy past that's typical for his place in society, so I just love the idea of sex suddenly becoming so "special" to him now that he's possessed with the need to mold your experience around him so you could never be satisfied by anyone else. I think he'd want to keep some of that shyness and insecurity no matter how much experience he gives you, so he can reassure you and praise you and tell you to suck on his fingers so the stretch of his cock won't be all you can think about.

He does favor praise over degradation but when he does degrade it's more... positive (???) in his eyes, calling you dumb because he wants you know you don't have to be smart, saying you're his slutty whore because he wants you to feel comfortable enough being as nasty as possible with him, etc. No matter what name he calls you, he's adding 'my' in front of it. The words will be the same, but his tone will change based on if you're driving him crazy (basically if he gets jealous for no reason again)

I also think that's he way more of a Dom type, he'll never go into extreme type stuff and he's more of a gentle Dom depending on the situation that led up to you fucking or making love. My modern!coryo is never going to let you have more control than letting you ride him (and you always end up getting tired, so he has to take over, which he is more than happy to do!). His control issues are severe like they are in canon, he's exhausted trying to hold himself back from just losing it on everybody. So, having a stress toy of an s/o that he can micromanage and love without limits does wonders for his mental health.

He's obviously obsessed with spanking/LIGHT impact play. The only bruises you'll get will be from him squeezing you too hard or littering your body with hickies, he'd bite you to pieces too but he likes to think that he has some sense of decorum.

He could get behind silk bondage, whether it's patterns on your body or spreading you out on the bed with your ankles and wrists tied to the bed frame. But he wouldn't do it because he wants to keep you from touching, he just wants to love you properly without you hurting yourself because you got shy and squirmed all over the place.

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jodjuya · 1 month

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I'm officially a hater. Every Halo game since the very first one is full of bullshit.

My many problems with Halo 4, as I experience them:

FOUR VIDEO GAMES IN A SERIES! FOUR DIFFERENT CONTROLLER MAPPINGS!!! MICROSOFT WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU???

What is the compass needle even pointing to on 117's assault rifle? we're adrift in open space...

WHY ARE THERE MOTHERFUCKING QUICK TIME EVENTS IN THIS GAME? FUCK YOU!

"these Covenant seem more fanatical than the ones we've fought before" - how the fuck can you tell??

Why did they give Cortana baby-face and big tits?? Pick a direction, Microsoft!! She can be prepubescent or postpubescent but not both of them simultaneously!

Why am I supposed to feel any sort of emotional attachment to Cortana anyway? She's just a Microsoft Clippy with blue boobs stuck on 🙄

"I'm the only AI generated from a clone" I'm vibrating with rage at how goddamn stupid that is.

I THINK YOU LITERALLY HAVE MORE PRESSING PROBLEMS THAN RETURNING TO HALSEY TO FACTORY-RESET YOUR AI WAIFU, MASTER CHIEF! YOU ARE EVADING HOSTILE ALIEN FORCES ON A RANDOM PLANET GOD KNOWS WHERE! JUST GET A NEW AI WAIFU WHEN YOU GET HOME! FUCK

"[Unknown alien transmission]'s behaviour is odd!" - how the fuck do you know that Cortana??? This is your first time encountering this transmission, how do you know it's not supposed to be like that?

Maybe the reason all these aliens are so hostile to you, Master Chief, is because the very first guy you saw you punched in the jaw and threw down an elevator shaft! Would it kill you to just try saying "hello" first?

Lmfao @ Cortana calling out the Chief for the exact same thing literally seconds later

"Requiem! At least we know where we are now!" - my guy you have no fucking idea where you are

WHY THE FUCK DOES HALO HAVE CINEMATIC 3RD-PERSON MELEE ATTACKS NOW?! JUST CLOBBER THE FUCKING GUY AND MOVE ON!

This is something I really disliked in Halo 3 too, but those invisible barriers that hard block you from taking vehicles indoors, even if you do manage to scrape them past the non-invisible barriers. Let me drive a Ghost indoors!

Why can't they maintain my weapon loadout on either side of a cutscene? Halo 3 handled this really well.

But here in Halo 4 I take my lovely SAW and my lovely Fuel-Rod Cannon into a cutscene and come back out of it with an assault rifle and pistol. 😒😒😒

• Seriously, why does Cortana have the face of a nine year old child and the body of a twenty-nine year old woman?! Am I taking fucking crazy pills here??

I can forgive video game developers being horny, but not when it's this gratuitously bullshit

(and the voice of a 59 year old woman, going by the game's opening cutscene of Dr Eugenics' interrogation lmao)

The new forerunner enemies are cool enough, but it really feels like they copied Borderlands' homework with their design.

Why is Cortana so blithely confident with all her info-dumping about these random alien creatures she's never seen before in her damn life? And why is master chief taking anything she says seriously when he knows she's going through AI-Alzheimer's???

The Didact is bullshit. Who the fuck is this guy? why does he call himself a "Forerunner" when that's 'our' word for them? and how does he indentify us as "human"? Also why's he so mad at us for freeing him? This is all so very stupid.

Wow. ANOTHER escape sequence involving driving fast through some exploding superstructure? Come on, Microsoft, it's all very well and good to rest on your laurels but this is just masturbating with them... I swear to you on my mother's life that having an original idea isn't nearly as painful as you seem to think it might be...

Even more being stripped of my good weapons and reset back to basic bitch assault rifle + handgun

"the greatest enemy ever faced by the forerunners: you" - bitch you've been extinct for like 100,000 years what the fuck are you even talking about???

"the Prometheans, they're human" what the fuck are you even talking about?? Who the fuck are the Prometheans??

Genesong, evolutionary acceleration, thousands of lifetimes' worth of planning? What in the flying fuck is all this nonsense? When and why did Halo become "What If Star Trek Was About Using The Power Of Friendship To Kill God"?!

Look, Microsoft, this shit isn't fucking rocket science. I shouldn't have to take an undergraduate degree in Halology to understand the fucking story of a video game. I shouldn't have to go read god knows how fucking many spin-off novels there are just to know basic facts about your game like who in the flying fuck are all these goddamn Elder God alien species you're name-dropping. I should just play the game and have knowledge of the game from playing the fucking game. Jesus fucking christ pull your head out of your arse and stop jerking yourself off and start making some goddamn sense!!

Why can this Space Orc Big Bad use The Force like Darth Vader anyhow??

Why is defeating Space Orc Big Bad a fucking quicktime event???

Lol get vaporised, idiot

Why was nuking his spaceship another quicktime event? Just make the whole thing a cutscene, christ 🙄

Master Chief finally makes it to The Waifu Dimension (via nuclear bomb?????) and his first thought is "how do I escape from here?" instead of "oh cool I can finally kiss my holographic waifu"

And now he's just, like, chilling out in orbit around earth, perfectly fine and unharmed?? after setting off a nuclear bomb in his lap with his own two hands?????

Hey, so why was I fighting digi-struct robots for the entire back-half of this game anyway? Isn't Halo supposed to be about fighting The Covenant and The Flood?? 😒

Also, didn't the Covenant have an internal schism/civil war last game?? Like, that was the whole plot of the whole game. Why are the Elites back in the Covenant again; are we just not going to bother with explaining that?

Holy fuck I hate this fucking game. Really glad I only paid seven bucks for it.

Things I liked about Halo 4:

It looks pretty

No more dual-wielding. Fun concept, sure, but it made the games' control scheme fucked to shit. Really felt like Bungie made all of the enemies into utterly gratuitous damage-sponges to compensate for MC's higher DPS too, and that sucked.

The weapon rebalancing, in general. The new Needler kicks ass.

No more dragging around a giant posse of allies with me everywhere. I feel like that was another big contributor to the enemies needing to be so heavily-buffed with sponginess.

Really glad the Brutes aren't in this game. Those guys were the fucking worst.

The items from Halo 3 were mostly useless and just served to clutter up the game. Forgot they were there most of the time, and kept activating them by accident when trying to reload. Glad to see they've been fucked off/heavily retooled. The new active-camo gadget is useful and fun without being overpowered; I really like how well they've balanced it. All of the other gadgets are fairly middling though.

The new machine gun is great! (SURE WOULD BE NICE IF I WAS ABLE TO KEEP IT FOR MORE THAN HALF OF ONE LEVEL THOUGH)

I laughed when I saw a grunt sprinting at my Ghost with a lit grenade in each hand. Some real Serious-Sam-type nonsense right there 😂

Stomping around in the Mantis mech was extremely fun

The sticky-bomb handgun was pretty fun.

Final verdict: Microwaved Slop.

I'll eat it if I'm hungry enough, but I won't enjoy it.

#Halo 4 #jodjuyas video game reviews

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formashimataichi · 2 years

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Reading chihayafuru and why does taichi keep going on with "is this all i am" thoughts is beyond me, like bro is good in 10 other things school topper ig and Chihaya has been constantly working all the time since middle school ofcourse she will be better than him, arata has also been practicing crazy since he was a kid under a former meijin. I don't understand tchi arc sometimes like ofcourse everyone has expectations from parents, most asian households have that torture, to top this all off he's rich lmao. Like chihayas mom is literally scared her daughter will have unstable life because this field isn't like other sports..

Sometimes even comparing him to leero retro also don't seem to be fair, taichi is so good in short amount of time , why the narrative makes him seem like an underdog of sorts. He is kind and changed a lot since middle school is the model student but he can be self centred. There's a guy Going blind and karuta all he has in the series there are women who are juggling family and a queen title so the whole fandom coddling taichi with oh poor baby makes no sense.

that's why i really enjoy his interactions with suou the most, like the whole "you ignore what you're blessed with" shtick (apologies if i'm misremembering the exact wording of the line, i'm too lazy to go and check the translation). there is so much in taichi's life for him to appreciate and cherish but it always gets bogged down in his own insecurities and his belief that if he can't be great at this one thing he won't be able to actually maintain those connections that he desperately wants to keep. i don't think you can really view his insecurities as mutually exclusive of his desperation for companionship. he's always afraid he'll be left behind if he can't catch up and it takes him a while to realize that this is a community that will always have a place for him regardless of how he performs, bc they recognize that he has a passion akin to the rest of them. i'm not personally a fan of comparing taichi's problems to other characters' problems bc i think each person deals with their own slew of issues that is worthy in its own right. being pressured all your life by your parents to do well and being dismissed otherwise is something that can seriously mess with your head and debilitate your forays into passions thereafter. esp when that factors into the relationships you form with people bc you're constantly being forced to leave behind the endeavors that are meaningless, and thereby the friends who are attached to them. i don't think it's realistic to say that bc he's good at other things he should be content when it's clear karuta is the thing he specifically wants to be great at, esp bc it keeps him connected to his friends. but at the same time, i also love how the narrative addresses taichi's privilege and weaves it together with his tendency to be self-critical anyway. he knows he has to change and be better and question his priorities and that's what really draws me into his arc. he knows there are aspects of his attitude and behavior towards others that are unfair and borne of jealousy and he doesn't like that about himself, so he tries however incrementally he can to mold his perspective into something more constructive and less vindictive. his constant devotion to improvement is inspiring even if it's a slow work in progress, and i like that he has setbacks and doubts himself constantly. it's very realistic in its non-linear portrayal imo

#i think this is why i kind of sit on the fence between the two sides of fandom lol #i'm not really a fan of coddling him but i'm not a fan of diminishing his issues either #obv many of these characters have arcs that intersect but i think it's helpful to look at each character #as possessive of their own distinct arc too. like each person has problems that are worth addressing and growing from #but idk i'm also generally really drawn to characters who behave questionably but are immediately self critical #i like that awareness in a character and i like that it makes them miserable enough to want to be better #asks

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defjcm · 2 years

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[8:43pm] “eric, stop!” you shriek, one of your hands tightly holding the door frame of your house for dear life as the cold night bites at your skin, causing you to shiver.

“babe listen. do this for me just for a few minutes.” he says, wearing a stupid grin that you adore so much. and you know he purposely give you that smile of his because he knows you can’t say no to that. the snow that falls for the first time that night dusting his hair and the stars that rest in the sky behind him makes him look more enchanting than he already is. “please?” his tone is more hopeful this time and you find your grip that’s stopping you from taking a step outside loosen as you fall into his warm embrace.

“you’re crazy.” you tell him but you’re smiling anyway, causing eric to smile instantly as the same exact thought comes to his mind. why on earth would he drag you outside to dance in the middle of winter?

the matching christmas pyjamas and thick jacket that the both of you wear obviously not enough to fight the harsh winter but somehow being in each other’s arms is enough to make you feel warm inside. your right hand now on one of his shoulders while he gently holds your other hand. “back,” he instructs while you move your feet according to his words, “and front.” eric’s smile stretches even wider when you stumble, finding amusement in your struggle and completely in love with the way you agreed to do this with him despite you not knowing how to do a simple dance; slow even.

his arms that wrapped around you pull you close to him that you could almost feel his heartbeat matches yours; quick but steady. and eventually becomes the silent rhythms that the both of you dance to.

when you finally look into his eyes, eric is already staring at you with hearts in his eyes. but after a mere second, the both of you finally burst out laughing, realizing the second time how stupid it is to be outside right now, “eric, we need to go inside! i’m freezing.” you playfully smack his chest, the laughter that escapes your lips is soft and sweet to his ears, causing him to laugh along with you.

“gosh, always against me being romantic.” he teases, eric’s warm hands that’s holding yours now leaving just to cup your cheeks as he gives your forehead a kiss and lets his lips linger on it for a little while before pulling away. “hot chocolate and warm cuddles after this?” he asks, his thumb rubbing circle in the softest way possible on your skin, causing you to nod wordlessly; in pure awe of his existence as if you didn’t call him crazy a few moments ago.

it is crazy; how madly in love you are with eric sohn. and it’s even crazier when he spells it out for you as if he can hear your thoughts at that moment, “i love you. i feel like i didn’t say that enough.” he smiles.

main masterlist

note: another rushed timestamp im sorry :( but this was inspired by a video i watched where this guy literally went out of his car just to draw hearts on the thick snow for his gf & idk i just feel like eric would do such silly things LMAO. but anws, take care & dress warmly! <3

#the boyz fluff #tbz fluff #the boyz scenarios #tbz eric #eric imagines #eric sohn #the boyz drabbles #eric fluff #the boyz imagines #the boyz timestamps #tbz scenarios #tbz timestamps #tbz imagines

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delicrieux · 3 years

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☆ﾐ 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚊𝚢 "𝚘𝚑"

PART 8: CAT BOYS

... it’s late into the night and y/n is streaming with one of her new friends, sykkuno. running on caffeine and redbull is apparently not enough because she falls asleep on his shoulder 45 minutes into their cyberpunk gameplay. at that exact moment, twitter goes up in flames.

─── corpse husband x reader, sykkuno x reader (because i was threatened by thirsty anons) ─── soc. media + written fiction! ─── word count: 1.8k author’s note: here it is...what yall been asking for. literally had to add a new part for this but i loved this idea sm i couldnt just nOT NOT do it. i tried writing this with the same energy as the smau lmao so expect chaos as always. hope you enjoy it and as always lmk what u think! hopefully yall wont go too feral, but tbh thats prolly too much to ask for xx EDIT: srr for the fucky format tumbler dot com is being lame

ultimate masterlist. ҉ myso masterlist ҉ previous. ҉ next.

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Such a back and forth continues for the better part of the day as you get ready. Corpse only whines a bit when you forget to text him back - you are packing, and your prestigious cat ears you bought from Amazon for 10$ deserve exquisite care - which only fuels your seemingly bottomless hunger for mischief, leading to you sneakily ignoring him more. When your phone lights up with a message, you giggle, giddy with excitement. Your laughter only gets louder and more erratic, to the point where Rae had busted down your door and threw her Hello Kitty plush at you - one you’d gotten her, mind you! - and told you to just “Shut the fuck up!”

Ungrateful. You know not everyone can appreciate your sense of humor, or stand your hyena like cackle, but that was uncalled for and you told her as much. Noting the mess your room is in (more than usual, that’s for certain), she leans onto the door frame, crossing her arms over her chest, pretty brown eyes twinkling curiously, “Where you off to?”

“So I had this idea-” You start, but are promptly shut down with a raise of her palm.

“Already know it’s a bad one.”

Insulted, and hurt, you clutch your heart. As if she had not mocked you enough today, “Rae...The hell, that’s so mean...” You mutter, face scrunching into a soft frown, “I only wanted to tell you what me and Syk thought of.”

“Oh?” Intrigued, she raises a brow, “Continue.”

“Gee, thanks for letting me this time.” You mumble, rolling your eyes, “So. We thought we’d stream together. The catch? In the same room! We’ll be playing Cyberpunk. Gotta cash in while the hype is still up.” You add, making her snort, “And, ya know, the whole cat boy business...We’ll be wearing matching cat ears. Admit it, I’m a genius.”

She’s quiet for a moment, mulling over your words; you can practically see the gears in her head turning. She glances around the room, then briefly at you, strangely apprehensive. “You sure that’s a good idea?”

Well, that is definitely not what you expected her to say. You figured it’d be more along the lines of you’d be one ugly cat. “Huh?” Is all you manage to stutter, “What do you mean?”

She gives you a look, one all people give when something is so plainly obvious, “Y/n. You do know the stans will go wild, right? And you do remember our conversation involving Corp-”

“Nope!” You exclaim cheerily with a bright smile to match. You don’t want to think about that. The relationship between you and Corpse is strictly platonic, and besides, seeing Twitter loosing their shit is always funny, and you never miss an opportunity to mess with your fans. Sykkuno is also a good friend, albeit a new one. This supposed flirting from Corpse’s end Rae deduced was nothing more than her projecting her feelings onto the situation. She always liked shoujo anime and was probably thinking one was happening right in front of her. Not a chance. Corpse was just being a friendly crackhead. Your energies mesh beautifully.

Like, beautifully in a strictly friend way. Absolutely nothing more than that.

She gives up, naturally, arguing with a wall would be more productive than arguing with you. You’re such a (Zodiac sign).

“Well,” She mumbles, ticking her head to the side, leaning off of the door frame and turning to leave, “Don’t say I didn’t tell you so.”

Your grin melts as soon as she leaves. Glancing at your bag, you shove your last necessities in with newfound hesitance.

Nothing bad will happen, right?

...Right?

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It is well past the generally set “appropriate” time to hang out, but since quarantine, what is appropriate anymore anyway? You’ve never been in Sykkuno’s apartment, but now that you’re here it’s...strangely him. Every corner seems tailored to his specific requirements. It’s cozy, and pleasantly warm - it’s a bit chilly in LA, as surprising as that is.

He’s even shyer than you remember him being. And a whole lot more awkward, but in an endearing way, a way that makes you want to laugh and try to reassure him that it’s just you and he has nothing to worry about. While you hung out only once, the history you share is rich and tender. From him following you on Twitter and subsequently prematurely ending your stream, to kidnapping a stray cat affectionately named Juan. His long lost brother, Juan (no the Second, just Juan), lives in your Minecraft server.

His stream room is sadly bare. There’s an appalling lack of merch or fairy lights. Not even led-lights. It’s a good thing you brought your own. As you try to decided which color would be best - his signature lime green, reminiscent of his adorable Among Us astronaut, or, perhaps, mischievous violet? - he boots the game and tweets out a quick “streaming with y/n in ten mins! come one come all!”

“You should probably tell your fans, too.” He mumbles, looking somewhere above your shoulder. You settle with cherry blossom pink. Glancing at him, you shrug.

“Ah, do it for me, please?”

“Oh!” He hiccups, “Uhm, I wouldn’t want to pry and I don’t know your password and-”

“It doesn’t have a password.” You had removed it, knowing something like this would happen. Bless your foresight, you did not want him to know it was demonspiitinmymouth. Before he could protest further, you rush to the nearest mirror to put on your cat ears and make sure they aren’t crooked. You look absolutely adorable. The cat boys in your dms will go feral. Hell, you might just go feral looking at yourself! Sykkuno is not ready. No one is. This will be a stream to remember.

When you return (with flourish of course), he’s anxiously fidgeting by his computer, his own little cat ears, one’s he wore for the Halloween stream, peaking out from his silky brown hair. You have to suppress a squeal. When he catches you gaze he gives the kindest, sweetest little smile.

“They, uh--” He points at you, then decides it’s rude to point, bringing his hand back to his lap, then clutching his mouse, lastly releasing a sound stuck between a chuckle and a wheeze, “suit you, uhm, a lot!” He finishes with a resolute nod, quickly spinning in his chair and away from you.

This is the reaction you desired. All is going according to plan. Is this what God feels like? If not, then you pity her. She’s missing out.

Taking a seat next to him - he had been gracious enough to haul you a spare chair from the kitchen - you draw closer, and he, instinctively, shrinks away with another nervous chuckle.

“You have, uhm... I-I didn’t look!” He quickly chimes. You raise a brow, “Uhm, unopened messages? From Corpse? He texted you when I was tweeting! I didn’t mean to look, I’m sorry-”

Instantly, you recall the famous vine with the scandalous “daddy chill” line, though refrain from saying it aloud. You love havoc, but you’re not evil (Rae would ardently disagree with you, though). Instead, you just shrug, “’S fine, don’t worry. I’ll text him back later. Let’s start?”

He nods, but doesn’t look at you. Granted, you don’t think he glanced at you even once since you returned, “...Okay. Ready?”

“Ready!”

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You’re much too immersed into the game and Sykkuno’s twitch chat to even check what’s happening on Twitter, but your estimated guess is that everyone’s going crazy. The stream chat is unruly as well, but missing the signature Twitter spark. Most of the chaos is bravely lead by your fans. Sykkuno’s, much like the man himself, are too nice to scream so unabashedly.

Perhaps you excitement had been a bit too taxing, perhaps drinking 5 coffees and 2 energy drinks today and not enough water are to blame for the sudden drowsiness you’re feeling, but you can’t focus on the swimming chat or the abundance of cut-scenes at the starting point of the game. You steadily draw nearer and he, more composed in front of his audience, doesn’t react. About ten more minutes of hoovering by his shoulder and muttering soft commentary, and you feel yourself slipping.

The last coherent thought you have is a few choice words directed at caffeine itself for having the opposite effect of you at the worst time possible.

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You float in oblivion for perhaps ten minutes at best. Once you awake with a startle, you shower Sykkuno in shy apologies and he quickly reassures you that it’s fine and that he didn’t mind at all!

“Though,” He adds after a thoughtful pause, “not sure if it was very, uh, comfortable?”

His stream chat spams uwu and variations of similar kind. The stream continues for a few more hours before the both of you wish everyone a good night.

While you planned on wreaking absolute havoc, this sudden falling asleep was unexpected. You pondered the consequences of such an innocent, unplanned act whilst ubering home, fearing to check your phone which by now was blowing up with not only Twitter notifications but also Rae’s angry messages that vaguely read “what the fuck y/n”. Within the past two hours she had left 57 messages on all platforms collectively, including 7 calls.

Corpse’s last text was over three hours ago.

Now that’s strange. Worry festers quickly. Briefly glancing at your surroundings - the pretty glimmer of passing street lights, neon signs, familiar buildings - you decide that it’s time to check what kind of nuclear explosion you’ve caused.

Your heart drops to the bottom of your stomach as you scroll past the hundreds of tweets and mentions. Scan through Rae’s messages.

You had failed to prepare ahead. Every explosion of such kind is followed by nuclear winter. And Corpse’s lack of messages feels especially cold.

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Not you smiling like a fucking idiot reading his last message! You shrink into the backseat, afraid the driver will accidentally look into the rear-view mirror and see you a bit too happy before asking questions. Good news? Yeah, but it’s not like it’s his any beeswax! In the words of Rihanna, just shut up and drive.

This argument had not yet happened, but you’re preparing, just in case.

As you think up of potential scenarios, your eyes drill into Corpse’s goodnight text. You’ve looked at it enough. Time to turn the phone screen off. Leave the app, at the very least. When the screen dims you instantly press on it to wake it up. This is embarrassing. Maybe the deadly amount of caffeine really did mess you up, big time. Your heart races in your chest, painfully almost. You feel a bit sick. Worst of all, you can’t stop smiling.

A notification from Rae makes you snap out of it. Ah, one more demon to deal with.

However, before you talk to her, you really need to tell Twitter that you’re not with Sykkuno. And apologize to Sykkuno as well.

At least Corpse doesn’t hate you.

Fucking hell, just exit the chat you idiot!

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tags (in italics is those i couldn’t tag! make sure all’s ok w your settings!) : @littlebabysandboxburritos - @fairywriter-oracle - @tsukishimawh0re - @ofstarsanddreams - @bbecc-a - @annshit - @leahh19 - @letsloveimagines - @bellomi-clarke - @wineandionysus - @guiltydols - @onephootinfrontoftheother - @liamakorn - @thirstyfangirl - @lilysdaydreams - @pan-ini - @mxqicshxp - @tanchosanke - @yoshinorecommends - @flightsandfantasy - @liljennyx3 - @slashersdream - @unknown-and-invisible - @sinister-sleep - @fivedicksinatrenchcoat - @mercury–moon - @peterparkerspjsuit - @unstableye - @simonsbluee - @shinyshimaagain - @ppopty - @siriuslystupid - @crapimahuman - @ofthedewthesunlight - @mythicalamphitrite - @artsyally - @corpsesimpp - @corpsewhitetee - @corpse-husbandsimp - @hyp-oh-critical - @roses-and-grasses - @rhyrhy462 - @sparklylandflaplawyer - @charbkgo - @airwaveee - @creativedogs - @kaitlyn2907 - @loxbbg - @afuckingunicornn - @fleurmoon - @yeolliedokai - @truly-dionysus - @multi-fandom-central707

more tags are in the comments bcs tumblr only allows me to tag 50 people max 💙

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jesslockwood · 3 years

Text

SOUR | T. Holland

Word Count: 1.7k

Pairing(s): Tom Holland x Actress!Reader

Warnings: angsty af, swearing

Summary: y/n and tom broke up, and when tom comes around with his new girl 2 weeks later, y/n is sour.

A/n: I was hesitant to post this due to everything going on with tom lmao but yk, fuck it lol. anyways lmk if you want a part two cause I this was pretty short and I have ideas! also I didn’t edit this much lol so sorry for the mistakes!

His brown guilty eyes were enough to know that he moved on, in two weeks to be exact, after you broke it off. He was spotted recently with a girl he said he was just friends with, what a damn lie.

You try to not let the tears out as you see them making their way on the red carpet of the movie premiere. He looked you straight in the fucking eyes, yet couldn’t even give you a heads up he was bringing a date tonight. You worked together for six months yet he didn’t have the decency.

He betrayed you. He didn’t cheat but he betrayed you.

You had even mentioned her by name before, yet he said you were paranoid and had nothing to worry about. What bullshit.

She was just a new trophy for him, one that he’d put on the shelf later, or smash like it like you were broken.

It started out so sweet and innocent. You had met working together and had started dating under the radar, and you fell in love with him so quickly, even at his worst, but it didn’t matter. He moved on with you still in the picture and that’s what hurt the most. But he would never see or care about how much you hurt. He wasn’t sorry.

Isn’t it funny how someone you thought could love you the way you loved them, was a damn traitor?

He played all these twisted games with your mind, thinking that he felt the same way about you, or at least cared.

God, you wanted to scream, she was sleeping in the bed you lied in and made with him. But she couldn’t care less, she got the prize, a shitty one at that.

You didn’t get it, he couldn’t have fallen in love with someone that quickly, not after what you had.

All you had done for Tom, it didn’t apparently matter to him, cause he’s dating her. He gave you his fucking word, that you were the one who meant something to him, you guessed he just used you.

She was gorgeous too, and she made you feel so small, unimportant and the paparazzi all turned to them, and barely any was paying any mind to you, the star of the movie. It sounded selfish but you put the blood sweat and tears into this movie, and all she had to do was walk with the man you put blood sweat and tears into, and she had all the attention.

He just had to bring her and was showing her off like a new trophy. God, you hated him. You hated him for hurting you like this. And yet, if he asked for you back, you would probably jump at the chance.

He seemed so genuine and true when you had first met him. Brown doe-eyed, attentive and listening to every word you said like it was the most important thing in the world, then things got ugly. He would play all these twisted games with you, making you feel like nothing one moment, and then his everything the next.

He even gave you his fucking word and a promise ring that he would always love you, But Isn’t it funny? He’ll never feel sorry for breaking you.

Suddenly one of your friends, well tom’s brother, wraps his arm around your waist, whispering to you, asking if your okay, before the paps get a few snaps in of the moment. Harry starts leading you away from the commotion before you cried. No one had asked you that until today. Which kind of shell shocked you, because you weren’t and he was the first person who seemed to care.

Harry at the moment couldn’t care less about the out-of-character way his brother was acting, especially towards you. Yes, he loved his brother but hated how he was acting. He couldn’t see how he could treat someone as lovely as you like that.

Tom didn’t even notice the way you were destroyed. He let you go, Harry couldn’t understand why because tom seemed so happy with you, until nearing the end of the relationship.

“Thank you, Harry.” you sniffle, once reaching the inside of the building.

“You shouldn’t be thanking me. I should be apologizing for my brother.”

You smile weakly at him. He wipes the tears from your eyes, before suggesting,

“After they have you up on stage for the thank you’s and stuff, we should just ditch this and go back to my hotel and get room service and raid my candy stash, if you’re up for it.”

“I’ll think about it,” you say with a more genuine yet sad smile.

“Let’s get in there, shall we?” he puts his arm out for you and you link yours in his.

What you didn’t realize is that tom saw harry wiping your tears while doing an interview, and saw you link your arms together when he got inside. To say he was fuming doesn’t even cover how enraged he was.

Once getting in, you realized you and tom would be sitting next to one another, something you truly wished you could get out of.

“You’d better wish me luck.” You point to the seats.

Harry got the bright idea to just take his brother’s spot. He wouldn’t care anyway, he had his new girl Zabrina.

You and Harry had a small conversation about what both of you had been up to after he was Tom’s assistant for filming. You saw him almost every day when you and tom would hang out, harry being the third wheel. You had spent a decent chunk of time with him and definitely preferred the company over being alone, or with your ex.

“I can’t believe you dropped your SD card down the drain! Photos are your life, so you should have paid attention!” you laugh with him.

“Harry, You’re in my seat.” Tom interrupts, with a scowl on his face.

“Can’t you just move down one? Y/n and I are talking here.”

“Tommy I can’t see from that seat!” Zabrina pouts like a child.

“If she can’t see why do I have to sit there? I actually worked behind the scenes on this movie!”

“Harry, don’t make me-”

“You know what! Harry and I were leaving after we thank everyone. So you two lovebirds can have the whole row!” you say venom seething from your mouth.

“There you go, Tommy. Have a nice night you two!” Harry follows up, really sick of the attitude his brother was having.

Tom’s face turned red under the makeup he had on. He was enraged. His brother was betraying him.

“Have a nice time, fucking around” he said, seeing red. he saw your face soften, from anger to confusion, to sadness. You didn’t think he thought so low of you.

“What the fuck tom! We aren’t-”

“It’s not worth it Harry, he’s not worth it,” you say sadly. Standing up, Turning to go towards the stage.

That hit tom with a pang in his chest. He was just trying to get over you, to move forward. But maybe that was the problem. He just left you in the dust (peter parker is that you?) to navigate the way you felt over losing one of the best things you ever had. God, you wished you didn’t fall in love with him before he betrayed you. You wished he just would have thought it through before he ruined you.

Your director motioned over to you and Tom to go up on the stage.

“I’ll meet you outside, Y/n/n.”

That was tom’s nickname for you. He came up with it and he was the only one who could call you that. You were his and he was yours. But yet he knew that long-distance was so fucking hard. He couldn’t put you or himself, so he found someone who was fine with the distance. Zabrina barely paid attention to him unless he wanted attention for herself, but he didn’t realize how he broke much more of you than the surface showed.

“She’s really pretty, I hope she makes you happy,” you mention bitterly, hoping in a terrible way, he’d never be as happy as he was with you.

Before Tom, you scream out no one would make him happy as you did. Your director cut tom off.

After your director said thanks to everyone and the film started you grab your bag from your assistant, before heading to the exit, tom hurriedly tried to follow you, being caught by Zabrina, asking Tom to take a selfie with her, so she could commemorate her ‘prize’ when truly, Tom was using her as a rebound.

“Zabrina, I need to talk to harry!” he whispers yells.

“Why? He literally is taking to your wretched ex?” she says with venom in her voice.

Tom jogs around her, trying to get to you and Harry, While Zabrina dramatically calls after him.

He was too late, though, he saw you from the doors, you were already getting in your getaway car, with Harry. He ruined everything.

Harry and you were sitting in the limousine that was rented for you, before harry states, “He’ll be the one who crying, I promise you.”

“I always knew this is how He’d leave me. He found someone more exciting, and better than me. I was used a discarded like nothing.” you laugh through the tears.

“You’ll find someone who finds you exciting Y/n, and you’ll be their whole world.” he comforts you.

“Good for him I guess, but it’s like we never happened. Like what the fuck is that?” you ask.

“He’s acting like a damn sociopath.” harry shrugs.

You laugh at that one.

“So what do you want to watch Y/n?”

“Would you hate me if I said legally blonde?”

“Not if we can watch fight club after.”

“You have a deal, Sir!”

Tom however was stuck, watching you and him on screen. Reminiscing of how he fucked up.

It was getting close to an intimate scene, probably his favorite one he’s ever done. All he could think about was someone else getting to touch you, and be with you, he wanted that but at the same time, he couldn’t deal with all the shit of being with you. The relationship was too good, so much that Tom thought sometimes he didn’t deserve someone like you. It was probably crazy of him for thinking like that, but he couldn’t bring you down with him, not when he was so fucked up. He wished he could be the one but he couldn’t so he just hoped you were okay.

Tags:

@spideyspeaches

@greenorangevioletgrass

@queenofthepouges

@minejungwoo

@keithseabrook27

@lolooo22

@webmeupspiderdaddy

@harryhollandsgirlfriend

#tom holland #tom holland x reader #tom holland x y/n #tom holland imagine #tom holland fanfic #Tom holland fic #tom holland fanfiction #Harry holland

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angelmichelangelo · 3 years

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I’m gonna speak over anon because I’m literally terrified of phannies coming after me even though I’ve rebranded, I still get hate anons from them even now which is crazy. Anyway. It’s honestly a relief to read a respectful take on why someone’s left the phandom. Your words put my exact feelings into articulation and I think my main emotion is just... disappointment? I feel like dnp hold their audience at an arm’s length now and for good reason. It’s impersonal, and after what we put them through I think they deserve that. The fact that people are still trying to keep some kind of momentum going, hyping up cookie-cutter content or you know, making aus about a literal REAL BABY just doesn’t sit right with me. It feels good and healthy to move on. They aren’t interesting now. Seeing people running full time phan blogs makes me actually uncomfortable. Because I don’t feel like it’s really about dnp so much as clout seeking half the time these days.

anon you are always MORE than welcome to come talk to me about all of this stuff lol (i have a lot of feelings ok?)

and you’re totally right. one of the weirdest shifts for me that kinda gave me the final push to leave was the fact that dnp stopped caring about their audience. and the thing is, dnp always seemed different to other youtubers because they had this connection with us. twice daily livestreams, one a week upload from the gaming channel, twice monthly updates between them… take 2018 for example, if you asked any phannie they’d probably agree that it was the best year for us all because it felt like dnp were on this emotional wavelength with us where it was like: ‘okay this is the content we like and this is the content we’re getting’ and it was so perfectly balanced. it never felt like they were just pumping out content for the sake of it. they could take a boring ass game like ‘google autocomplete’ and make a real good video out of it. that was the content and the dan and phil i enjoyed.

and now??? dude. the mere idea that phil went ahead and deleted all his lessamazingphil videos to reach a larger audience is just…….. if i cared more i’d be mad. they so clearly want a different audience now. im sorry to the phannie moots that follow me still but that’s just what i see. phil’s content went from lighthearted jokey funtimes to ‘oh my god you’re a 30 something year old man making content on the same level as fuckin troomtroom and you’re still making butthole face thumbnails to appease the algorithm.’ and that’s just heartbreaking bro. what the fuck happened. i was around for the cereal tasting video (i never watched it i don’t think i’ve watched a single video since last year) and like………… the hype it got? for a low quality looking buzzfeed quiz type video is just… yeah. dude, this goes beyond the argument of ‘BUT JENNA MARBLES MADE THESE VIDEOS!!!! SHE DID IT AND EVERYONE LOVED IT!!!’ and the difference between phil and jenna was: jenna put a whole lot of fuckin effort into those videos to make them unique. not just: trying on makeup! but instead: ‘trying on makeup and then squirting eye drops into my eyeballs to make myself cry to then see which one is best for dramatic crying purposes!!’ there was a whole spin on the take that i’ve never seen phil EVER do. sorry to this man but he really…… isn’t as creative as he used to be. he falls flat every time in his videos and it makes me laugh when i see the same 😯 face in his thunmbnails with the most boring looking video idea painted in bright colours. this is the same man that was making those wacky ass videos in 2009? could have fooled me. are we sure he isn’t working for buzzfeed or something because that’s the vibe i get from him lmao.

and dan. ohhhh dan. OH DAN! he’s fed up of his audience too. at least he’s got the balls to at least half admit it (or maybe he’s just stupid idk lol) but yeah. he’s not coming back to youtube, or at least, in a way that’ll bring him back the views. he doesn’t care, and he hasn’t cared for a long time. i’m not sure what the hell he’s doing and like i said: to those running phandom blogs, you’re tough dude. you’re tough as hell because how anyone can scrape together content for this man is beyond me lmfao. he either wants: real intelligent smart people audience from his book (i have so much to say about that i could write a fuckin book) OR he wants: gay 30 year old men audience from his…. *sigh* his weird horny tweets he makes once a month. im sorry but WHAT?! THIS is a man that people want to stan????? AND ANOTHER THING: that hideously awkward livestream thing he did for AIDS… did nobody else think it was just SO HORRIFICALLY out of touch for him to making SO MANY “im such a horny slut i slept with so many people i got so many diseases”…. for a charity stream…….. for AIDS????? im sorry but how gross. that…. that fucked me off so bad im sorry but what the actual fuck is wrong with this man?? his content it all over the place and frankly i thought it was all awful. if this man ever does do a stand up comedy show like he’s been alluding to then holy shit THATS maybe the funniest thing he’s ever said in his life because that man ain’t funny (and he never had been im sorry i always was too scared to say that in the pits of phandom hell but yall need to hear it: he’s not got a single funny bone in his body and really honesty? neither does phil. they’re only ‘laugh worthy’ because they’re acting like the mf chuckle brothers).

that’s the impression i get. dan and phil have never been more disconnected from their audience. their merch is horrific like seriously what the fuck phil why are you charging your fans £70 for something i could get in primark for £15?! because again: their merch was always a plus for me (not that i ever bought it personally) but it was nice to know a youtuber wasn’t just slapping their name on a shirt and going DONE! it always had a theme or a connection to them, their brand, an inside joke or whatever. now phil is making…. couch club merch??? what the fuck is that? also side note: when i went onto their website to take a look at it i actually cried laughed at the fact that he’s selling the socks separately. phannies, you’re in deep i tell ya. oy vey.

so yeah im probably gonna piss everyone off with this huge rant but frankly idc anymore lol phandom is probably gonna die out anyways because how can you keep a wholeass fandom afloat on the algorithm appeasing content squeezed into 10 minutes and a man that is too embarrassed of his audience to ever give a shit about them. like, if u like their shit and u wanna keep ur blog about them: go for it everyone should enjoy what they wanna enjoy but also this is my opinion and if anyone wants to come crying to me about it like ‘b-b-but emmy YOU were a phannie once! ur just a jealous ex-phannie doing what all ex-phannies do which is be mean a bitter!!!!!’ like…… ya. why do you think everyone that leaves phandom starts being honest about them? because in phandom dnp can do no wrong 😌 and in phandom you must be nice to smol bean phwiw lester and danny howell 😌 otherwise all the big phannie account will come and eat you 😌 lmfao but yeah that’s all i have to say i guess. boy, this felt theraputic as fuck. and also im sorry you’re getting hate anons, i get a few filter through as well like… idk, phandom is just insane to me and now im like the final girl in a horror movie, standing in a pool of blood like: oh shit. i’m alive! lmfao

thanks for the ask anon, take care <3

#low-key let me start drama in the phandom #for good times sake #lord knows they’re bored out of their minds over there!#im kidding i uh i wish u all the best? good luck? idk man #IDK #ask #anon #phandom #<- putting it in the tag for spice LMAO

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daaziscoolbesties · 3 years

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[REPOST] MY 2K WORD COMMENTARY/ANALYSIS OF RANBOO’S LORE STREAM

‼️‼️This post contains lore spoilers from Ranboo’s 4/23 stream, “The Enderwalk Saga. Chapter 1: The Lessons”. If you haven’t seen that stream don’t read ahead unless you want spoilers‼️‼️

disclaimer: this isnt really an analysis as much as a bunch of commentary and half-baked theories.

-on the way to the mansion he was sort of talking to himself saying stuff like "i'm good i'm good" which m a y be a normal thing but also maybe it's not and it flew over our heads cause he talks to chats and donos like that so often

-again, this one may just be a normal thing but when he was climbing up the stairs in the mansion looking for foolish, he repeats some of his words like down to the exact same tone of voice and everything. 12:42, "this mansion is way too big actually. this mansion is way too big actually." (why the repeated actually? seems odd to me but again it might just be a normal thing that i haven't picked up on). (right after) "okay okay lemme find him lemme find him" again repeated words in the e x a c t same tone.

-does everyone know about ranboo's silk touch hands ability thing? or was that just a techno and ranboo main character moment. bc if it was, how would foolish know that ranboo could pick up the full cake after it'd been partially eaten. unless everyone on the sever knows about that in which case this means nothing. but if they d o n t know... how would foolish know? ranboo wrote about it in the do not read book so maybe if it's not a publicly known thing maybe foolish got his hands on the book and read it??

-14:53-ish, they're talking about the war room and how it was for tubbo or whatever and ranboo says, and i quote "he prepares for lore but he's never gonna do it." now funny thing is at first i couldn't tell if he said "war" like in reference to the war room or "lore". but after playing the clip over and over i can say with ALMOST 100% certainty that he said lore. there is a definite L sound at the beginning of the word. which either means a) this was a slip up (doubtful bc he said later that there were no mistakes), b) he broke the fourth wall because they were supposed to be rping at that point, or c) i'm completely wrong and he said "war" which leads down an entire other road of possibilities

-15:17 "are you a book reader?" "*checks inventory for do not read book* uh yeah i'd say i'm a book reader-" dunno how i didn't catch this the first time I HATE THAT DAMN BOOK

-15:18 there's blue in his hotbar. where did he get the blue.

-16:40 "it's like a metaphor- i have two minds: i have my normal self, my normal little shift-dancing self, and then the builder one. the builder one is demanding. it's a very demanding mind." ranboo then lets out a weird sigh after this. i feel like what foolish was talking about was an indirect(?) parallel to ranboo in and out of enderwalk, there's how he normally is, trying to do best for others, and then there's enderwalk, meeting up with bad guys and "demanding" things (its very late as i write this i really don't know what i'm talking about)

-17:11 "you have your panic closet" i'm sorry his what now 😀 no but seriously how the hell did i miss some of these

-18:04 "you're asking me if i remember?" very funny ranboo thank you for making jokes in these trying times

-18:25 WHY DID HE GET OUT THE AXE WHEN STARING AT THE BEE

-19:38 why did foolish hold the grass block- most of these observations probably mean nothing but- h u h - is that- i'm too tired for this

-19:54 "i never properly thanked you for the deal you made with me" so foolish got something out of this deal, we're not sure if ranboo did. "the green cardboard box" again do you mean dream's house- but seriously the only people i can think of on the server that are associated with green are dream and sam. and i have no idea what cardboard box could be referring to. foolish got a lime colored shulker from drista

-20:30 "we're supposed to only talk about it at a certain location" hmm now where would that be? panic room maybe? cause like usually after doing a big thing in the enderwalk state ranboo wakes up in the panic room so maybe? the deal was that they only talk about it in his house

-21:52 how does ranboo receive(?) the lessons? like are they whispered to him in his mind or is he seeing them as words in front of him like we see? hmm

-"Lesson 14: If you have the opportunity to gain a favor, take it." "gain a favor" don't you usually ask people for favors though? how does one "gain a favor"? anyways i'm pretty sure lesson 14 has to do with the deal foolish was talking about. (the deal explained because i now have info: at some point a bit ago foolish met up with ranboo and asked to make a deal, he'd gotten a shulker box from drista. the deal was that ranboo would have ownership of the box, it would be under his name but foolish rents/borrows it indefinitely. ranboo negotiated that if he took ownership of the box he would get a "war favor" from foolish where if something happens that creates sides, ranboo can ask him a favor that could change his side. but why would foolish want ranboo to have ownership of the shulker you may ask? well i have an answer for you. a theory actually but still. basically since drista technically isn't supposed to give out shit on the server if someone where to have that stuff then they may get in trouble. foolish wants to be able to use the shulker but if it gets found he doesn't want to get in trouble, so he can blame it on ranboo seeing as it's under his name.)

-22:16-ish "i still have this from when you *can't understand whats said here*" well i guess that sort of explains why he had the grass block? idk man (info update: he had the grass block from when ranboo threw it at him telling him to calm down like what ghostbur does with blue)

-31:35 "i figured out how to cause it" how to cause the enderwalk state

-38:30 "ninety three lessons" I STILL DONT KNOW WHY HE KEPT SAYING NINETY THREE AND NOT NINETY FOUR AND ITS DRIVING ME CRAZY LMAO

-39:01 "it's all for the greater good" okay well when are you gonna start thinking about yourself and not everyone else for once huh. self care bitch.

-40:31 he started holding the axe when he was looking at sam- gonna say it i really don't like that axe ahahah- WAIT A DAMN MINUTE THE AXE IS NAMED "axe of ender" I DONT LIKE THAT I DONT LIKE THAT AT ALL

-41:53 is there something?? physically keeping him from telling sam??? or maybe it's sort of like his enderwalk state taking control to make him shut the fuck up??? so many questions and approximately zero answers

-43:18 ranboo raising his voice legitimately scares me 😀👍

-"Lesson 27: Do not reminisce on what you have lost for it will weigh you down." showed up when he was thinking about and REMINISCING about the community house 👀👀

-"Lesson 53: Never fully trust anyone." showed up literally after he said that he thinks he can trust the other people on the server enough to tell them about what he did

-"Lesson 67: Leave no evidence of what you have helped with." this is different from the others because there doesn't seem to be at least a semi-direct connection to it? unless maybe at the time ranboo was near something he may have "helped with"? not sure about this one

-"Lesson 94: DO NOT LET THEM KNOW WHAT YOU HAVE DONE" yeah yeah i get it i get it he's fucked up some shit in enderwalk i don't feel like analyzing this thanks

-OH OH NOTICE HOW HE SAYS "REMEMBERING" WHEN THE LESSONS SHOW UP. IMPLYING THAT THIS ISNT A NEW THING, ITS HAPPENED BEFORE AND NOW HES REMEMBERING IT. MAYBE HE WROTE DOWN THE LESSONS WHEN HE WAS IN ENDERWALK AND NOW THAT HES BEEN EXPERIMENTING ITS BEEN EASIER FOR HIM TO REMEMBER THOSE ENDERWALK MEMORIES

-okokok the experiments are that he's been e x p e r i m e n t i n g on how to purposefully induce the enderwalk state. and we know now that it wasn't from the pain of the water because on the stream afterwords he said that it's caused by the intense fear of something happening. and so the "side effects" of the experiments is that since he's in enderwalk more often(?) he starts remembering more things from it

-OH MY GOD WAIT "there is a reason sam, there's so many reasons, theres ninety three of them" (44:47) WHAT IF EVERY LESSON IS TIED TO A QUOTE UNQUOTE "reason" THAT RANBOO THINKS HES A BAD PERSON/NEEDS TO BE LOCKED UP BUT HE SAYS NINETY THREE INSTEAD OF NINETY FOUR BECAUSE THE NINETY FOURTH LESSON DOESNT HAVE A REASON YET/HE DOESNT REMEMBER IT HAVING A REASON

-dude honestly the whole sam part hurts so much this man is scarily good at acting

-46:46 "i cant put you in the prison you wouldn't be able to see michael anymore" bestie that's the point he doesn't want to accidentally hurt michael or tubbo in the enderwalk state—

-okay but there's no way that sam couldn't tell that ranboo was at least TRYING to confess to something- i feel like he definitely knows more than he's letting on because usually like when people do bad shit or admit to doing bad shit he's like in Prison Guard Mode™️ (he literally cut off ponk's arm because he stole some keycards or something) and whatever and idk what he knows but he definitely knows something and is trying to protect ranboo. or he's trying to manipulate him or smth either one works—

-50:38 "you are a good person" "i am?" you can hear my heart shatter. "yes you are" "i don't think so sam" "i do, even if you don't" "i really don't think so" and there it goes again

-51:25 hello badboyhalo i see you to the left of ranboo

-52:44 "but then my curiosity got the best of me" curiosity killed the cat, bitch

-52:54 "there's ninety three, ninety four, ninety- theres so many reasons!" SEE!! NOT ONLY ARE THERE THAT MANY LESSONS THERE ARE REASONS THAT CORRESPOND IM S O SMART—

-52:56 "i don't want to remember anymore!" *quietly brings forth my theory that when ranboo loses a canon life his memory gets wiped*

-53:13 "ive opened pandora's box" isn't the prison?? literally called pandora's VAULT??? so this m a y be a stretch but i'm thinking that maybe this could be taken in the literal sense that he "opened" the prison and let dream out (the sirens at the end of quackity's stream confirm that dream is indeed out)

-53:42 mans just straight up walked through a ghost i—

-55:37 so are we just gonna ignore the eleventh page of the book? "he's alive, but hopefully soon dream won't be"??? alright nevermind it's most likely bc when tommy came back he recruited ranboo in his plan to kill dream

-55:47 notice how he writes "what am i?" as opposed to "who am i?" no elaboration here idk what it could be

-56:08 just so it's clear for anyone who doesn't know- he's wearing armor at this point, and i'm like 90% sure that when he wears his armor water can't hurt him. and i saw someone say somewhere that like with splash potions when thrown it turns into a gas-like thing? so again, it didn't hurt him, he didn't get hurt. he said in the chill stream that he wasn't comfortable making it where his character had to hurt himself to do that. the thing that causes the enderwalk isn't pain, it's intense and sudden emotions like fear and stress. thank you for coming to my tedtalk.

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writingtoforgetreality · 3 years

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Basement Of No Hope (Rob Benedict x Reader)

[Actors-Masterlist]

Summary: Louden Swain had a few upcoming gigs & you decided to rent a house in the area. Jason & you tagged along, being the opening act for each show. The house was big, six bedrooms, enough for everyone. When you could not agree on who would occupy which room, you let a good old game of rock paper scissors decide for you. Today was your lucky day, apparently.

Words: 2,430

Warnings: language, mentions of nightmare (I had to bring some angst in there, okay?), Rob being dramatic af (other people write songs about heartbreak, dude, but it’s alright), strong dislike of basements (from personal experience lmao), soooo much fluff it’s kinda disgusting

Inspired by: “Basement Of No Hope” by Louden Swain (aka Robbie & his dramatic ass writing a song because he lost a game of rock paper scissors – no, really…if you haven’t watched the video, pls do, it’s hilarious)

If you like my work & wanna support me: a coffee would be highly appreciated ❤

You were at the airport in Nashville, currently waiting on your luggage. The flight had been rather relaxing, you even managed to get an hour or two of sleep in. Rob’s shoulder was used as a pillow but he did not seem to mind. Here you were, with the Swain boys & Jason. The following nights, Louden Swain had multiple gigs lined up, all in the area. They had asked Jason & you to join, to be their opening act. Having a few songs on your own & being more than comfortable to perform next to Jason, you agreed. Of course you did. Rob & you were…something, after all. Neither of you knew what you were but you were something. Best friends, but you were best friends with all of the boys. The only difference was that you did not want to kiss them when you looked them in the eyes. Rob was the exception. Everyone was aware of your crush on him. Everyone but him, it seemed.

Two vans were waiting for you all. They were supposed to bring you to your accommodation for the next few days. Rob, Jason & you were occupying one car while Billy, Stephen & Mike seated themselves in the other. Most people were confused because you only ever hung out with men but you did have girlfriends, too. Well, they were Rob’s friends first but you guys hit it off immediately. Besides, it was great to hang out with people who shared your passion for music. Your music career was still in the starting blocks but you had released your debut EP not too long ago & luckily, a lot of Louden Swain’s fans loved your music as well.

It was late when you arrived at your destination. Lazily, everyone dragged their suitcases inside, putting them in the entrance area. The moment you wanted to grab your stuff, Rob beat you to it, sent you a wink & left you standing outside, dumbfounded. He could be such a dork. After shaking your head & chuckling quietly to yourself, you followed him inside. Looked like you were interrupting a heated discussion. Listening to it for a few moments, you could make out that apparently, they were arguing about who would get what room to sleep in. Rolling your eyes, you were annoyed by their childish behavior. It was moments like this where you asked yourself if they were grown ass men or defiant children. Today, it was the latter.

“Guys, guys, guys. Can y’all turn it down for a second?” your voice was loud but not loud enough for them to hear you. Crossing your arms over your chest, you tried again, this time literally yelling.

“GUYS! SHUT UP FOR FUCKS SAKE!” like a switch, the discussion died down & five pairs of eyes were looking at you.

“Thanks. Okay, let’s try this again, shall we? Billy, what’s the matter?” knowing Billy was usually the one to keep it cool in situations like these, you turned to him & waited for his answer.

“Really? You’re asking him?” Rob chimed in. Rolling your eyes once more, you focused on Billy, waiting for his explanation.

“So, there are six bedrooms for six people, right?” you nodded, signaling him that you understood & he continued. “Stephen checked all of them. They are okay. All except one. The one in the basement. It’s…creepy.” he finished. Letting out a quick laugh, you were not sure if he was kidding or not. But his look told you that he was being serious.

“You’ve got to be kidding me…” you mumbled under your breath.

“No, really, (Y/N). You gotta check it out. It’s bad.” Jason spoke up & motioned for you to follow him. Heading downstairs you were shocked to say the least. Okay, you had to admit, it was not luxurious whatsoever. The exact opposite. When you made your way back to the entrance area, the boys were waiting for you reaction.

“Okay, I get it. But guys, come on, it’s late…Can’t we just go to bed &, I don’t know, deal with this later?” an exhausted sigh escaped you.

“Sure, you can take the bedroom in the basement then.” Stephen suggested.

“Forget it. I won’t sleep down there. Dude, I’m scared of basements, you know that.” being annoyed at Stephen for even bringing this up. Good Lord, this was bound to be a long night.

“Let’s play rock paper scissors to decide.” Mike said after a few seconds of silence. Rob eyed him carefully, not really knowing if he was serious or not. But before you had enough time to tell them how stupid Mike’s idea was, the other four agreed with him.

You were standing in a circle, ready to beat the boys. As long as you did not have to sleep in the basement, you were good to go. Literally every other room would do. Stephen shortly explained the rules. Getting in position, you started with your first round. The first round ended quickly. Everyone won against Rob & when the realization set in, you all started laughing so hard that tears made their way down your cheeks almost instantly. Rob cursed & complained about how everyone had cheated which made this entire thing even funnier. He was pissed. Like, deeply pissed. And even though you felt a little amount of pity for him, the majority of you was just happy that you did not have to reside in that creepy ass bedroom downstairs. Rob grabbed his stuff & made his way downstairs, not longer caring about the rest of the game.

“Go fuck yourself.” was the last thing you heard from him. Again, you all ended up laughing like crazy. This was too good to be true.

Billy lost next, followed by Mike & Jason which left Stephen & you for the final battle. The first round went to Stephen. You won the second one. The last one would settle who would get to sleep in a nice king-size bed. The second place would get a great room, too, so whatever was about to happen…it would be a win-win situation. The others were circling you, cheering for the both of you. Stephen told you to close your eyes, he would do the same, so that the others knew the outcome before you. The damage was done, you went for scissors.

“Guess (Y/N) gets her well needed beauty sleep.” Billy joked & you opened your eyes. Stephen lost with paper. But before you performed a little winning dance, you made sure to playingly slap Billy for his awful joke.

“No need for beauty sleep, the princess is always looking flawless.” swaying your hips when you left for your earned room, carrying your suitcase with you. It was only then when you realized how heavy you had actually packed. In no way would you ask any of the guys to carry your luggage upstairs. Well, there was one person you would actually ask but this certain someone was residing in hell aka his incredible basement bedroom for the time being.

Wanting to experience the softness of the mattress as fast as possible, you quickly went to the bathroom to take a quick shower & to brush your teeth. You wrapped the towel around your body & walked back into your room to search for a suiting t-shirt to sleep in. In the end, you decided on one of Rob’s old shirts you stole from him a while ago. He was never wearing it anyway & it was freaking comfortable, so why not? Pushing it over your head, you did not bother with pants. The shirt was too big on you & you were in this room alone. A yawn escaped you & only a second later, the warmth of the bed was embracing you.

It did not take long before you shot up from your bed, breathing heavily. Shit, another nightmare. Usually, you could handle them just fine. Especially when you were with other people, they pretty much disappeared. You were confused why you had experienced one now. Unfortunately, or fortunately, you could not remember what it was about but since your heart was beating incredibly fast, you assumed it had been a bad one. There was no way you could be alone for the rest of the night. It was not something new to you to share a hotel room or a bed with one of the guys. Sometimes it was just easier, especially at Conventions, to share with another person in order to not take up too many rooms. Mostly, though, you did end up with Rob.

Looking to your door, you were contemplating going to him. But nope, that was not happening. He was sleeping in the basement & while basements themselves creeped you out, the thought of actually having to walk through the entire house by yourself scared you even more. Checking your phone for the time, you were shocked when it read 3:00 am. Shit, if you were not about to tell anyone about your nightmare you might as well not get any more sleep this night. The upcoming gig came into your mind & you knew you had to be well rested to perform perfectly.

It seemed like your hands were moving by themselves & all of a sudden you were calling Rob. Which was stupid, really. He would not hear his phone when he was asleep but you were desperate & still pretty shaken up from your previous nightmare.

“Yeah?” his sleepy voice interrupted your thoughts.

“Robbie?” your voice was small & you did not think it was possible, but your voice cracked by just saying his name. Damn nightmare.

“(Y/N)? You alright?” hearing bedsheets shuffling, you assumed Rob was sitting up. His voice was filled with concern. He knew you would not call for no reason, especially not in the middle of the night & definitely not when you were in the same house.

“Um…I-I had a nightmare & I just…I don’t even know why I’m calling you. I’m sor-“

“What room are you staying in?” right, he did not know because he was too pissed off to stay for the rest of that stupid game.

“The one with the king-size.” you mumbled, not really sure what he was getting at.

“Got it.” the call ended & you were left confused. Would he come to you?

The door squeaked open slightly after a soft knock. Your eyes had adjusted to the dark & you could see Rob’s silhouette in the doorway. He began walking over to you & took a seat on the bed. Immediately, you could feel his arms wrapping around your frame & pulling you close to his body. Being in his presence calmed you down in an instant & for a while, he just held you without saying anything.

“Looks like you won the game.” Rob’s whisper broke the silence in the room. You let out a chuckle & he did the same.

“Yeah, & you’re lucky enough I saved you from that hell hole. I’m sure that bed was uncomfortable as shit.” pulling away, you looked at his face. The darkness did not hide his features & you were happy that he was here with you right now.

“It was, which is why I haven’t slept yet.” he admitted with a laugh.

“You serious?”

“Yep. Doesn’t change the fact that I’m fucking tired…Do you wanna talk about it?” his eyes locked with yours & that was the point when you were sure that you were in love with him. The way he cared for you, genuinely cared, would forever be a mystery to you.

“I can’t remember what I saw but it was…bad.” sighing frustratedly. “I just knew I didn’t wanna be alone & I sure as hell didn’t wanna wander around the house all by myself. That’s why I called you.”

“Do you think you can go back to sleep?” because he would have stayed awake with you if that was what you needed.

“Yeah, now that you’re here…” if it were not for the dark room, Rob would have seen your blush. He simply nodded & pulled you down with him. His arm was draped over your waist & he hugged you close to his chest. A soft kiss was pressed onto your shoulder & this simple action sent goosebumps down your skin.

“Goodnight, (Y/N).” he mumbled into your neck.

“Night.” you whispered & soon enough, the both of you were fast asleep.

A loud voice woke you from your peaceful slumber. Whoever it was was about to get punched.

“Wakey, wakey, sleeping beauty. Billy is making breakf-…Robbie?” of course it was Jason. He knew you could not stay mad at him & this man had never learned how to knock.

“Do I even wanna know? Um, you know what? I don’t…Anyway, breakfast is about to be done. At least I don’t have to go to the basement to wake Rob now.” the last part sounded farther in the distance because Jason was already turning around & walking out of your room. You could feel a chuckle behind you & soon, you found yourself laughing with Rob.

“Good morning, slept well?” turning around in his arms, you stared into perfectly blue eyes. When he saw you, he could not help the smile that was forming on his face.

“How could I not when you were literally next to me?” you blushed at his words. He could be so cute sometimes, it really was disgusting.

Getting up from the bed after a few more minutes of just enjoying being in Rob’s arms, he let out a whistle.

“My shirt looks good on you.” you brushed off the warmth that was spreading on your cheeks with a shake of your head.

“I’d hurry up, Robbie. Billy’s pancakes are to die for. Your fault if you’re too late.” you winked at him & put on some sweatpants before leaving Rob alone in the room. The two of you had spent nights sharing a bed before but there was never cuddling involved. Usually, you would stay on your sides & that was about it. Tonight changed everything. He knew you could tell as well. And that change was for the better. It was bound to happen. Literally everyone but you knew it would happen sooner or later. And here you were, after so long of keeping your feelings pushed down, finally moving into the right direction. All of it happened because a damn game of rock paper scissors...

Published (04/01/2021) by Cathy

Tags: @chelseashurley, @traubellianfirebuilder (thanks for your support <3)

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twoidiotwriters1 · 3 years

Text

Déjà Vu (Or are we losing our minds?) -Modern!Shirbert

A/N: That’s right! I’m starting a new (old if you ask the fellas in Ao3 lmao) AWAE series!! I was waiting to have enough chapters and now that day is finally here! I hope you like it -Danny

Words: 3,961

Next Chapter

Chapter One: Make Your Own Decision.

'Two souls don't find each other

by simple accident.'

Gilbert wasn't a morning person.

Medical school was a pain in the ass, he didn't need to say that to anyone– He didn't like to complain at all if he was honest, after all, it was thanks to school that he was going to become a doctor. Still, he missed the lazy mornings on his bed, no worries in the world apart from what his father would make for breakfast.

That was years ago, though. Now he was an adult (or the closest thing to it, anyway) and he had bills to pay, he didn't have to pay rent and that was certainly a good thing, Bash and Mary were a gift sent from heaven after his dad had died, but he still helped around their house, along with the schoolwork he worked on relentlessly while trying to ignore the uncertain future knocking on his door almost every day.

After all the sleepless nights pacing around the kitchen, lights on and coffee maker ready to go, memorizing things and finishing research papers, he's pretty sure this isn't exactly healthy, but if he's bound to have similar routines for the rest of his life, he might as well get used to it.

He tries not to think a lot about that, his future, that is. All around him friends start to settle down, move out to their own places, find love, travel, having adventures while he spends all his weekends locked in his room learning about a new subject that is just as thrilling as any date he could possibly have.

That's a lie, of course. He longs for a break, an excuse to run wild and free just one night.

Luckily for him, that opportunity comes this Friday.

___________________

Anne's in love with the early sunlight, that warm, clear light that slips through her window every morning to announce a new day with no mistakes in it yet was about to start.

She loves the quiet, how time slows down for her while she pours a second cup of tea for her morning readings before heading to school. She loves the muffled noises Diana and Cole make while getting up, letting her know she has to hurry if she wants to start her routine on time.

She's a simple young woman (a very new one at that, if she was honest) and the little things still manage to give her a thrill that parties or any kind of social interaction simply can't.

That's half a truth, of course. She misses the weekly reunions with her Highschool friends, the bike rides with Jerry, her old neighbor, whenever they needed someone to rant about stupid things and none of their friends was around to do so.

Despite all this, she is fine. Anne follows the path to her dream: to become a successful writer for all kinds of people, to tell the stories that people need most at the moments when all hope seems lost and love is scarce.

However, when her Highschool friends text her and Diana about a much-needed reunion, she didn't have to think twice before replying with 'Oh god, YES.'

___________________

The Orchard was fairly known for its homely 'aesthetic' as some would call it, which attracted the younger people that needed a break from their crazy student lives. The diner had originally belonged to Gilbert's dad, but when he passed away, it fell onto Gilbert's hands and him, not wanting to close the place that had so many memories of his childhood, decided to add Bash's name into the papers.

Their dads had been good friends most of their lives, and although Gilbert and Bash aren't the same age, he thinks of him as some kind of older brother who always helped him get through the hard times, especially right after his father was gone. It was only natural that Bash owned half of the diner, after all, he loved the place as much as Gilbert, for his father had worked there in the bar while Mr. Blythe served the costumers.

The two lousy boys had dedicated most of their free, youthful time, to run around the place like they owned it. Now that they did, it was pretty much the same, only that this time they run around placing food on the tables and scribbling people's orders.

After a few months of hectic confusion, Bash's mother practically forced them to hire more staff, since they had their hands full and Gilbert was breaking under the pressure that it was to keep the business going the same as his career.

They hired one of Gilbert's old friends and a few students that lived near the diner. Moody Spurgeon, Prissy Andrews, Charlie Sloane, and the Pauls (They weren't related, they just happened to be named Paul).

That Friday was the last before their winter break, so it was packed with tons of eager students wanting to eat their money away now that most of them were returning home for the holidays. This meant two wonderful things to Gilbert:

One, the diner was going great.

Two, he was getting the well-deserved sleep he'd been lacking for months.

Excluding that night, because that night he was going to get utterly shitfaced with Moody and company after their evening shift.

___________________

"I've never heard of that place before," Anne replied distractedly as she kept grabbing things from the table and putting them inside her bag.

"Students love that place, Ruby says they serve the best food and she's always there, but Jane says she's actually crushing on one of the waiters, though Ruby refuses to either confirm or deny..."

"Ruby's always crushing on someone, though," Cole replied. "If she's still going after all this time, the food must be worth it as much as any cute boy."

"I honestly don't care as long as there's enough room to sit and have a long, long chat with all of you," Anne smiled dreamily. "I've missed them so much! Even Josie– And you know how often she tends to get on my nerves!"

"You wouldn't be missing them so much if you could put the books down every once in a while to hang with us," Diana rolled her eyes. "Honestly Anne, it's a miracle you're not blind or wear glasses at all after all the hours you stay with your face glued to the pages."

"I'd look awful with glasses!" Anne grimaced. "I hope my eyesight stays the same for the rest of my life."

"Well then, take care of your eyes and take a break from those books. Leave your bag here, you won't need it," Cole grinned.

Anne's eyes landed on the bag laying on top of their table. That bag was used for one thing only: To carry as many books as possible in case she got bored, so she could read at any time, any place. Also to carry her keys and pads, but those weren't as important.

"But... what if the girls arrive late?"

"You can talk to us, or are we too boring for you now, Miss Literate?" Diana teased.

"You know that's not it," She rolled her eyes. "Okay, if you want I'll leave the books."

"Perfect," Cole clapped once and got up excitedly. "Let's go!"

___________________

"Gilbert, come back to earth and take this to table three, will you?" Charlie hissed, putting the plate in front of his nose and waking the boy abruptly.

"Sorry!" He jumped, walking hurriedly to said table.

When he got back, Charlie was still there, examining his face.

"Are you sure you want to go out, man? I can tell you're worn out, maybe you should take a–"

"No!" Gilbert growled. He cleared his throat and continued on a much lighter voice after noticing this. "I- Uh, I'll be fine. I'll sleep all I want tomorrow, but today I really want to go out, before you and the boys go back to your homes for Christmas."

Charlie nodded with uncertainty.

"Maybe you should change places with Bash? The kitchen might keep you alert instead of sitting here and wait for people to call you over."

"Yeah..."

"I'll get him," His friend decided, walking back to the kitchen.

Gilbert heard the entrance's bell ring and turned to see Ruby Gillis and a few other girls enter.

Ruby was a good and constant client. He was glad about Bash taking his place because he believed that Ruby had a crush on Moody, and the waiter always took her orders no matter the table she was in, he didn't have enough energy to watch them ogle at each other.

"You okay, Blythe?" Bash patted his back once he and Charlie reappeared behind him. "You're sure you want to go out? With that look, you're likely to scare all the ladies away instead of getting a date for our Christmas party."

"Very funny," Gilbert scoffed. "I'm fine, I just need to stay active."

Before either Bash or Charlie could reply, he rushed into the kitchen, missing the exact moment when three new costumers arrived at the place.

***

"I see why people love it here," Anne said. "I feel cozy just by looking at it!"

"Yeah," Cole agreed, frowning slightly. "We are going to a bar after this, aren't we?"

"Cole!" They replied.

"I'm just asking!" He exclaimed. "It's lovely and all, but I'm not spending my last weekend away from my maniac siblings eating a freaking burger."

"It's likely," Diana retorted. When she noticed Anne's eyes widening, she quickly added. "No one will force you to get drunk, I know you hate how... uhm– Well, how crazy you get."

"I love drunk Anne!" Cole laughed. "Last time I saw her we were playing truth or dare and she was dared to kiss one of my friends, but then I convinced Josie to change the dare and after that Anne grabbed me by the collar and whispered very loudly. 'Thank you Cole. I actually want to kiss you now' and when I reminded her I was gay, she retorted 'Oh, sorry Gay, I thought you were Cole' "

Diana and Cole chortled, Anne shook her head in horror.

"Drunk me is terrible!"

"No! Only her puns are."

"Can we just get a table, please?"

"Oh!" Diana grabbed her arm, pulling her to a distant corner. "They're here already!"

The next few hours passed way too fast. Anne, finally reunited with her best friends, felt as if she was finally coming back to life.

As Diana had predicted, they decided to go to a bar a few streets down the road from The Orchard. A place their waiter, a young man named Moody and who Anne suspected was the waiter Ruby had feelings for, had recommended to them, casually letting them know that he was going to be there after work with a few of his friends. Ruby practically dragged them to the bar as soon as they paid the bill.

"Bet Ruby ends up declaring her love to that waiter in less than an hour, and ends up spending the rest of the Holidays mourning because she scared him away," Josie whispered audibly to Jane and Anne. The former sniggered and nudged Josie's arm. Anne frowned worryingly towards her friend, really hoping that wasn't the case.

___________________

"Who's ready to lose all memories from whatever happens tonight?" Paul asked loudly over the music, placing a bunch of drinks in front of the group.

The boys answered by chugging down drink after drink, getting clumsier as time went by.

Gilbert was having a blast, most of his days he wishes he could go back to being a teenager, slightly more different than the one he was. One that wasn't all that quiet and reserved and bitter about his dad's fate.

He longed for his lost youth, where he would attend parties and go to prom looking sharp, accompanied by a pretty girl beside him. All those teams and clubs he had to leave to stay home and spend the last days of his father's life next to his bed, all those gatherings he missed with people from other places because he had to get the best grades so one day he could be a doctor, so he could save the people he loved... so he didn't have to live through the uncertainty and the uselessness again.

Tonight he was finally getting that, he could pretend he was still just a boy, a stupid boy who didn't know how to drink and most certainly would end up throwing up half his stomach out of his body, but a happy boy at least.

"You know," He yelled to no one in particular. "Did you know, that you guys are my best friends?"

The boys replied with words of appreciation, patting his back harshly. Charlie even hugged him.

"I mean it!" He continued. "These last few months have been shit. There, I said it. Shit."

"What you need," One of the Pauls said, he wasn't as drunk as Gilbert, but he was definitely almost there. "What you need is to get laid."

The boys erupted into mayhem, agreeing with Paul. All of them except for Gilbert.

He frowned, not understanding what they meant.

"I said I'm not tired," Gilbert shook his head, his whole body losing stability and crashing against Moody, who held him in place as if it was normal to lose your ground while sitting on a chair. "I don't need to lay in bed just yet."

"I meant sex," Paul retorted, chugging down half of what he had in his glass.

"Oh," Gilbert sat back, eyebrows raising as if he'd never thought about it before. "Well, that's different."

"You need a break," Charlie slurred. "Or is the good doctor too much of a saint to touch a strange girl?"

"I'm not," Gilbert huffed, drinking what was left of his drink. "I can have sex. I like sex!"

"But Gilbert, you've never had–" Moody started, but was soon cut off by Gilbert's sudden movement.

The young man stood up, leaning on the table and losing all the color on his face. The rest of the group moved away as Moody grabbed Gilbert by the shoulders and straightened him up.

"Gilbert?" He asked, slightly coming back to his senses.

"Bathroom," He said quietly.

"Alright," Moody gulped. "Be right back, guys. Gilbert needs a moment."

___________________

Anne spent the majority of the night talking with everyone, and the problem with that is that she gets thirsty when that happens. Which is a dangerous thing to be at a bar.

Still, Cole -what a great friend he was- made sure to always keep her glass full so she could take sip after sip without having to wait.

She knew she was far from sober when she found herself in the middle of an argument with Josie and Tillie about zodiac signs. Anne was talkative on the daily, but after a few drinks she was simply unstoppable- There was no soul on earth or heaven that could follow her train of thoughts, and right now she wasn't even sure she was following them herself.

"I have to pee," She said, interrupting her own story and sliding out of their booth to stand up.

"I'll go with you," Ruby said, impatient to have an excuse to stand up and look around for Moody, she'd barely touched her drink all night.

"Okay, but it's not like I need help or anything," Anne rolled her eyes, accidentally stepping on Tillie's foot. "Woops! Sorry, Tillie!"

Cole watched her along with Diana, both raising their glasses and making a silent toast for their friend. Anne was finally having fun after such a dull term and it was simply amusing watching her act so recklessly during her drunken state.

"Don't stay for too long Anne," Ruby warned her. "Last time you fell asleep inside the stall and Diana had to crawl underneath to get you out!"

"It wasn't my fault!" She replied loudly. "I hadn't slept at all that week, and the alcohol makes wonders to my insomnia."

"I think you've had enough for tonight as well," Ruby grinned. "I'll get you a cold glass of water once where back in our table, okay?"

Anne nodded, silently making her way into the girl's toilet. Since it was just one bathroom, Ruby had to stand outside, leaning on the sink and examining her reflection on the mirror. Two men, one dragging the other, walk past her in a rush and opened the boy's bathroom harshly, the one who'd been dragged quickly fell to his knees and started vomiting his guts out.

"Oh my god!" Ruby gasped, covering her mouth in horror. "Is he okay?"

"He's fine," The guy said without turning to see her. "He doesn't drink this much often, that's all."

The young man stood up once he made sure Gilbert was doing fine on his own, not choking or anything, and turn to meet the blonde's eyes.

"Oh," His cheeks reddened. "Hi!"

"Moody!" She exclaimed happily. "You weren't lying, you came here after all!"

"Yeah," He smiled. "We wanted to give our buddy Gilbert a good night before we return home. Now I'm not so sure about it..." He grimaced at hearing his friend's grunts and gags.

"I'm with my friends as well, but I..." Ruby blushed lightly, even that she managed to make enchanting. "If you have time, we could seat together for a moment? Just the two of us?"

"Right now?" Moody asked in surprise.

"Well, no," Ruby peered over his shoulder at the boy's bathroom. "Not if you can't, I see your friend is feeling terrible..."

"He'll recover," Moody brushed it off. "He's studying to become a doctor, you know? I bet he'll see his way out now that the alcohol's out of his system"

"You're sure?" The girl inquired.

"Are you able right now?" Moody looked behind her to see the girl's door. "Were you waiting in line or is one of your friends there?"

"A friend, she's also wasted," Ruby said, pondering her options. "But... I guess if she managed to walk all the way here on her own... she can walk back just fine?"

Moody's smile widened.

"We better go get those drinks, then?"

"Sure!" Ruby exclaimed, holding Moody's wrist and dragging him back to the bar.

A minute after her friend had left, Anne walked out of the toilet, mid-conversation with a Ruby she didn't know was no longer there.

"... and the toilets here are so comfortable, I almost felt tempted to have a nap right there, but a promise is a promise– See, Ruby? I didn't stay for too long!" She looked up to find the spot empty, her confidence falling. "Or perhaps I did..?"

Lightly stumbling her way over to the sink, she focused on washing her hands before going back. Her reflection looked back at her and smiled happily, putting some strands of loose hair behind her ear and failing to notice the boy's door opening.

There was a small slate on her right with the words 'Wash your hands before you leave! :)' written with purple chalk that she found adorable. She picked it up to examine it further when a body clumsily crashed against her side.

"Woops!" The man said, not looking up. "Sorry."

Anne raised her brow for a second before turning her attention back to the slate.

Gilbert washed his face and hands, the world less blurry than before but still awfully intoxicated. Paul's comment came back to him and feeling the girl's presence behind his back he decided it was rather convenient.

"Excuse me," He asked, looking up and facing the girl's reflection. "Can I ask you something?"

It took her a moment to realize he was talking to her, the man kept staring at the mirror instead of turning to face her, but she could sort of see his face under the dim lights looking back at her though, and since she was feeling rather chatty, she obliged.

"Sure, what's up?"

"Do I look like I need sex?"

Anne laughed.

"Dunno, why're you asking?"

"My life sucks," Gilbert shook his head casually. "And I'm about to have the worst hangover ever."

"That makes two of us, dude."

Gilbert tilted his head, turning to see her now, taking in her appearance.

"You would have sex with me?"

"Excuse me," Anne frowned. "I barely know you!"

"Yeah, but am I attractive?"

"It doesn't matter, I wouldn't have sex with a stranger."

"Very well, then imagine that I'm not a stranger," Gilbert rolled his eyes, having to hold on to the corner of the sink so as not to lose his balance. "Would you do it?"

Anne started to imagine, she imagined a great deal so she could give a precise answer.

"Well, I'd have to know your medical records cause I don't wanna get any diseases, and then I'd have to find you likable because looks aren't everything– and if I'm having sex with you I probably want something that lasts–"

"Nevermind," Gilbert snorted. "I think we're both better if we don't have anything at all."

"Why's that?" Anne asked irritatedly, this guy was making no sense to her.

"You overthink a lot and I already do that way too much for my own good," Gilbert explained.

"Oh, so you'd rather take advantage of a dumb girl, is that what you're saying?"

"That's what you're saying," He scoffed. "I only asked if you'd have sex with me in a hypothetical scenario but you rambled on with the rest, Carrots."

"I was giving an honest reply," She stated. "And don't call me, Carrots. You sound like a child."

Gilbert laughed loudly at that.

"Better a child than a grumpy librarian," He walked up to her, grabbed a strand of her hair and pulled lightly, with a taunting voice, he added. "Carrots."

Anne's fingers gripped the slate harder than ever as she flung it to the man's head. It was small and thin, so it didn't cause severe damage, but the slate broke in half with a nasty 'crack' that pleased her a bit too much.

"How dare you!" She yelled in drunk anger. "I don't know who the hell you are, but I'm certain no one would have sex with a jerk!"

She stormed off, giving Gilbert no opportunity to apologize. Although he didn't seem to mind that much at the moment, the things around him spun once more and he had to return to the toilet to vomit what was left of his evening drinks, dreading the following morning.

___________________

Anne, Cole, and Diana returned home with rosy cheeks and loud laughter surrounding them. The trio intoxicated in happiness and many, many margaritas and shots.

"Best night ever!" Anne yelled as she let herself fall on the couch, kicking off her shoes.

"Told you it was going to be fun!" Diana grinned, laying beside her.

"My favorite part was to find Ruby making out with the waiter when I went to ask for the check," Cole cackled. "No wonder why she abandoned you in the bathroom!"

"Don't even tell me about it, I had the most unpleasant encounter–"

"Oh my god!" Diana sat up, looking at her phone with wide eyes. "It's four in the morning! We have to be back in Avonlea in less than eight hours!"

Cole and Anne groaned.

"Can't we have a nap first? We packed all of our things already!" Anne whined.

"Please?" Cole fell on the couch opposite to them. "I'm exhausted!"

"Fine..." Diana sighed. "But I'm certain my mom's gonna kill me for arriving late."

"What can she do? Forbid you to go to their Christmas dinner?" Cole chuckled. "Just sleep, Diana."

"Goodnight, guys."

"Goodnight!"

"Sweet dreams," Anne mumbled, half-asleep.

–––––––––––––––––––––––––

Next Chapter –––––––––––>

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thisdreamplace · 3 years

Note

The friendship situation you’ve changed for yourself,,, I related SO much. Your previous situation is where I am in my life right now. I did have quite some friends pre lockdown (before finding about the law), which made me think that what I want is here but then it slowed down and reverted back to the old situation after moving back to my town. Could you talk a little in depth of your change? Were i am one of a kind, i am their favorite, i am the best they ever knew/had, your affirmations?

I will try my best to explain what I did in depth!!

So basically, I want everyone to realize it’s possible to change even the “worst” parts of your life. Because I cannot stress enough how this was such a “problem” area in my life, for basically all my life. Like, my lack of satisfying relationships with people coupled with the fact I had an incessant need to feel and be treated as special, had me in a constant rock bottom. I guess you can say I really got through this by playing out the victim mentality until I couldn’t anymore. Like, I guess I really had to get it out my system. That doesn’t mean all y’all will. But I’m the kind of person where I must allow myself to feel what I feel, so it makes sense to me why it was sort of a dramatic experience releasing the old story lmao So my point in mentioning that is, you can feel terrible and feel like you’re going nowhere and life will still change for the better as you persist. This is why persisting is so important.

So anyway, I finally got all the crying and victim mentality out of my system. This is where I can say things started to change, because what happened was I got so tired of the hard days/nights that I moved into acceptance. Like, “you know what, maybe things are literally so opposite of what I want to be experiencing right now but that’s just gonna have to be okay. Because I can’t keep living a life that is so focused on the circumstances, that I can’t even have a good day if the things outside of me aren’t to my liking.” It just wasn’t okay with me anymore, so I started accepting things instead... for me. Not in a giving up way, but in a my peace of mind is so much more important type of way.

So anyway, by this point in time I was tired of affirming so I cannot tell you that I was out here affirming because I wasn’t. All I really did was accept things and intend for things. I tried to consistently see myself in a high regard. This looked like seeing something I didn’t like but being like “okay. whatever. It is what it is. I don’t need this thing to be happy anyway.” I know some people are good at the whole, aggressive “no it’s MY way, period!” kind of thing, but for me it just makes me feel worse so it’s better for me to just chill tf out and allow things to be, while focusing more on the inner work. I would try to focus on bringing myself up in my mind, instead of looking for the outside validation. I had to be careful and make sure I didn’t do this out of resentment. I had to shift into seeing taking responsibility as a lovely thing that must be done, because within the law there is no one to change but self. The more I allowed myself to accept that, the more it became easier to just focus on changing myself.

I wasn’t perfect. You don’t have to be this perfect person who never gets hurt or upset. I would try everyday, to walk as if I am the person who has it all within. That I am the Goddess of the world within and I am loved by all. But that doesn’t mean everyday was great. That doesn’t mean that plenty of times I felt like I just wanted to run away from the world. Some days I didn’t even want to think about the law. Some days I just simply couldn’t stand to be around others, but I had to go out into the world anyway. And in that way, I was bold. I felt terrible but I was bold enough to dare to think, “you know what. I have nothing to prove. My interactions with others can still be amazing because I am loved no matter what.” And I got through it, even if I didn’t feel like I could. I am big on being loved for me, without even trying. I want to be regarded as the upmost greatest for simply breathing. Not for becoming someone I am not, so I emphasized this heavily on the harder moments.

So, a bit of self-acceptance and love is at play here. Because, I learned two things that really helped me: consciousness is the only reality, of course. But also that the inner self is the artist and the outer self is the painting. So, if the inner self feels punished, the outer self will end up being punished. If the inner self feels embarrassed and terrible to be who they are, the outer self will feel these effects in their experiences. Do you see what I’m trying to say here? I really started to give myself the acceptance and love I wanted for so long, in a comforting way. So, this looked like immediately forgiving myself for the things I did say and the things I didn’t say. Immediately accepting myself even if I did look like a fool in front of someone. If I did/said something I am not proud of, I simply reminded myself to not make the mistake again, instead of punishing myself and harshly judging myself within. Just giving myself that space to be accepted and loved for all my moments, really played a big part in my opinion. If I want to experience a world where I am so loved for just being me, well then I must begin with my inner world and give myself that gift. Even when I am crying and so upset, I remind myself that I am accepted like that. People don’t turn away from me or become tired of me. They love me fully. Relaxing into the fact your Godself is the epitome of unconditional love helps with accepting this kind of love for yourself, at least it did for me.

Some days, I did fully go back to the victim mentality. The biggest thing was though, no matter what, I knew I couldn’t stop persisting. Some days, doubts would creep in telling me people don’t mean it. Back in the day, I used to run with that. A person could have told me they loved me 100x and as soon as they left I would go back to obsessing over the fact they probably hate me now and are over me. So, now I make a point to do the exact opposite. I am so comfortable talking about the compliments I get because I try my best to not let them slide. I take them to absolute heart, because this is my reality now. So I accept all the beautiful and lovely things, even when I feel scared to believe it. Accepting the lovely moments in full really helps you realize the law works and is responding to your inner efforts, in my opinion. Seriously, I take every little good thing and milk the hell out of it. The same way I used to do with the undesirable things. Try it, it works wonders for your confidence.

Anytime little things may have happened that made my insecurities creep back up, I would just do a self-reassurance/validation kind of thing in my mind. Especially now, since I am understanding/accepting more and more that consciousness is the only reality... it’s a lot more easier to see something that is happening in the 3D that kind of hurts my lil sensitive baby feelings, and not let it bother me on a deep level. Like, ouch. But I don’t have to identify with it. It’s not even true, because only love is true. And if it’s unlovely to me, it simply isn’t the truth. Only love is true. With this understanding, I can keep moving, staying within the story that I prefer. Because I know that unlovely illusion is my old story. I know I am the best, the greatest, the most wonderful. And in good times, my mind may try to resort to the “they don’t really mean it” game and I remind myself, nah. They definitely do mean it. People mean every word they say to me and they don’t hesitate to show they mean it either. That is my story within and I don’t need an outer reason to stick to it. I stick to it because I like it and it makes me feel good. That’s the only reason I need for persisting.

So uhhh yeah, I don’t even know if any of that makes sense. But to sum it up:

There is no one to change but self. There really is nothing crazy and extraneous you need to do. As you can see, I had plenty of off days and still got what I wanted because I persisted. The only type of technique I did was the lullaby method, where I repeated an affirmation to fall asleep. But I only did that for a couple weeks because I get bored of the same affirmations. Oh, and of course I meditated. And I can say a heavy focus in my meditations is feeling loved. But I guess the biggest thing I did was just change the way I see myself, regardless of what the 3D would show me. And I just persisted in my new self concept, without needing outer validation.

I tried to not make this all over the place but not sure I did well. haha Hopefully this is helpful!! 💖

#i am

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marveloussupernerd · 3 years

Note

Hey! I SWEAR I’LL STOP SENDING IN REQUESTS lmao but I really really enjoyed your jumin Halloween charity fic and recommended making a part two for Christmas time and you said to remind you in December and here we are! Obviously you don’t have to do it but I wish you a happy holidays nonetheless take care!

Aw literally don’t worry about it you are the absolutely sweetest and I love writing things for you !! Thank you SO MUCH for reminding me I’m all excited to write this now

Holiday Charity Stream (pt1) - Jumin

Summary: after the insane success of your Halloween live stream for charity, you’ve been asked to hold a Christmas one. This time there are fun games and some RFA guests too

This time you were ready for the event. Last stream was a little slow going because you weren’t used to such a large, diverse audience, but this time you felt a bit more confident. It was helpful too that the RFA members were going to be guests on the livestream, taking some of the slack off you.

Baby-wise things were going pretty well. You had just started your second trimester, thank goodness. Your morning sickness was gone and you even had a little bump to show for it. This was something people were always so excited about! But you chose to dress up in an oversized sweater. You didn’t want to feel self-conscious; even if you were pregnant, people always talked.

Shaking that thought from your mind, you made your way onto the couch next to your husband to get ready to start your stream. You were now streaming on five international channels and YouTube. It was exciting to see how much everyone enjoyed the last one!

“Are you feeling alright?” Jumin asked, placing a kiss to your forehead, resting a hand on gently on your stomach. “If you don’t feel well at any time, we can take over. It’s okay, really. Everyone will understand.”

“I know.” You smiled at him. “But I’m feeling really good actually. Super energized. Excited to raise some money and have fun.”

He chuckled, smiling fondly down at you. He was dressed in a cute Christmas sweater as well; you had convinced him that sweater Jumin > suit Jumin, at least for these livestreams. Made him far less intimidating. He said he was starting to look and dress like a dad. It made your heart flutter.

Jaehee came over and set a glass of water next to you. She had been shoving water down your throat all day. You half-glared at her. Any more water and you’d probably drown. You knew she was just looking out for you as a friend though.

“Don’t pout like that,” she fake-scoffed. Jumin straightened up upon hearing her tone. He must not have fully understood you and your friend’s dynamic. “Mr. Han, please make sure she keeps drinking. The lights are hot and I don’t want her to get sick.”

“I’m fine,” you rolled your eyes. You grabbed her hand though, shooting her a smile to let her know you were teasing her. “Thanks for watching out for me Jaehee.”

“We’re starting in 2. I’ll make sure everything is in order.” She excused herself, leaving you and your husband sitting in front of the bright lights and the camera.

“No big surprises this time, huh?” Jumin asked. The tech people came over and started hooking microphones on the two of you.

You leaned over to look him in the eyes. “I don’t think I could pull another one on you. What would it be? Twins?”

“I don’t know if we could handle twins,” he teased.

“I wish we would have gotten the baby’s sex by now. That could’ve been a fun thing to share too.” Oh well. Gender reveal parties were usually toxic anyways.

“Have you ever thought about keeping it a secret? Not finding out until they’re born?” He asked. The people moved away, finished with their job. There was a gleam in Jumin’s eye.

“Hmmm... if you want to then we can do that. Gonna be a pain to theme the room though.”

“Worth it.”

The cameraman started counting down the start of the stream, grabbing your attention. This time you’d open up the video.

“Hi everyone! Happy Holidays from the Hans! We are just so excited to be spending the holiday season with you and your family, and raising money for such a great cause.” You went on to explain a little bit about today’s charity, an organization that made gift packages for the Low income children in the city to make sure they got presents on their special holiday.

“Remember, please give what you can,” Jumin chimes in. “Also, I’ve heard word that those who donate a certain amount will be able to send us a message.” He looked over at you. “That’s kinda cute.”

You giggled. It was cute. “Today we’re going to have a few very special guests from our organization, the RFA, with us, and lots of fun challenges and games. It seems my poor husband has been living under a rock and missing out on a lot of fun holiday things.”

He chuckled again, rolling his eyes playfully at you. A top donation came in already! It was a news site. They thanked you for supporting such a good cause and then asked how far along you were.

“Oh! I’ve just entered my second trimester.” Your hand instinctively rested on your stomach. “I have the tiniest bump, but it’s one of those things where you swear you can see the difference but aren’t sure if it’s just you going crazy.”

Jumin’s hand joined your own, linking his fingers with yours. “It’s been very exciting. We’re anxious to meet the little one, but we’ve got a long way to go.”

“Now, for our first guest of the night, we have the musical actor Zen! Let’s all give him a warm welcome through the screen,” you segued.

Zen walked out onto the set. He was wearing a high necked black sweater. He looked very posh. The color contrasted well with his pale skin and hair. He looked all ready to go, but walked in with caution.

“Hi Zen!” You got up to go over and give him a hug. Jumin and him awkwardly shook hands. “We had to have you here first while the set was absolutely clear of any cat allergens.”

Jumin looked over at the camera, rolling his eyes, somewhat playfully. “He’s allergic,” he explained.

“Well I appreciate that.” Zen focused his attention on you, taking a seat next to you on the couch, you squished between the two men. “I’m so happy to be here today. What fun thing have you got planned?”

“Well, I thought we could do a finish that lyric, Christmas Carol edition! Jaehee picked the songs, so I don’t even know what’s going to play, that way I could take part in it too.” You had thought long and hard about different challenges that would highlight everything so wonderful about each of the members, and you’d be an idiot not to have Zen do something related to performing. Jumin didn’t have too bad of a voice either. It was a nice warm baritone. You liked it when he thought you were asleep and sang to the baby, soft enough that you could just barely hear. He really was the sweetest man and oh no you were definitely flushing.

Zen nudged you gently with his shoulder. “What a great idea! I’m excited to crush this one.”

Jumin quirked an eyebrow, chiming in: “Oh no, I’m going to crush this one.”

You decided to let them have their little rivalry. You were certain Jumin wouldn’t win, he never listened to the radio. Zen was a maybe, but you were semi confident in your own skills. You listened to holiday music all the time, especially in your childhood.

Jumin got the more traditional Christian ones. Oh Holy Night was all his. There were way too many verses for you to remember. Away in a Manger? Nailed it. Zen focused on the classic Christmas songs: Jingle Bells, Frosty, Rudolph. When things got a little newer and sometimes a bit more vague, that’s where you really stepped it up. Rocking Around the Christmas Tree, Christmas Wrapping. Dammit! Zen stole All I Want For Christmas Is You. That’s okay. Last Christmas, The Chipmunk Song. Thank goodness you were forced to watch the glee Christmas specials by one of your friends; they really covered all of these.

“It looks like it’s a tie.” Zen commented, looking down at the scoresheet. You and him had an even number of wins, Jumin trailing behind.

“No, you must’ve forgotten.” Jumin took the pen and paper and glanced at it. Zen was right. “Uh- my wife and I obviously count as a team. So we win.” He scratched his neck awkwardly. You and Zen just laughed, brushing him off. You’d have to force him to endure the Glee Christmas special eventually as well; it was the best way to learn all the songs.

You gave Zen a present to thank him for coming (a bountiful bouquet of roses), and sent him off. Time to answer some viewer questions while you waited for the next guest. Another glass of water was set next to you.

“What does Elizabeth the III want for Christmas?” You read off the question list. “Oh! I guess we can bring her out now that Zen is gone, huh?”

One of the workers let Elizabeth out of your bedroom and she strolled over to you, stretching then jumping on the top of the couch.

“If only I could talk to her to find out,” Jumin sighed wistfully. Oh no. You had to change the topic before he got another business idea.

“I’m sure what she really wants is a nap! She sure does love napping.” Your draw for attention was not subtle, but to Jumin it was. Jaehee wiped a bead of sweat off her forehead from behind the camera.

“And!” You added, cutting Jumin off before he could even think to say something, “speaking of animals, our next guest is currently studying to be a veterinarian. This is Yoosung Kim!”

Yoosung came onto the set, tripping over a cord that luckily was not connected to anything important. Jumin stood up quickly to make sure the poor boy didn’t fall, and Yoosung’s ears turned bright red out of embarrassment. “Sorry, it’s really bright up here.”

“I’m feeling the exact same way, trust me. Yoosung, do you wanna know what game I’ve planned for us this time?” You asked, trying to smooth over the embarrassment Yoosung must have felt.

“Sure!”

“We’re all going to be making gingerbread houses! Yoosung, I know you’re a good cook, so I’m going to leave one house to you, and I’m going to team up with Jumin to see if we can even attempt to build something that stands up,” you explained. The chef came in and placed the cookie pieces on a tray in front of you, white frosting already in piping bags and bowls of candy laid out.

“All the gingerbread is fresh-made. I’ve never built one of these but I’m quite excited to try,” Jumin grinned. He was being so sweet and enthusiastic about the stream; it was nice to see him so open to broadening his horizons.

You had ten minutes on the clock. When they started, you immediately got to work, explaining to Jumin how to do it. At first, he tried to stand up the pieces without any frosting to connect. Then you told the poor sweet boy that that is not how they work. You got to work piping a thick layer of frosting on the edges of the pieces to stick together, and left Jumin to hold them in place while the frosting hardened.

You glanced over at Yoosung. How did he glue everything together by now!? He was just one person. You tightened the top of your frosting bag, piping snow onto the roof. “You wanna line the top in candy? I think it’ll look cute,” you suggested to Jumin. “I’ll do the windows while you do that.”

Jumin nodded, grabbing gumdrops and nestling them into the pile of frosting on the roof. As you were piping a window into place, part of the roof fell on your frosting bag, squirting frosting all over the side of the house. “Jumin!” You squealed.

“Sorry. I think I pressed too hard.” He sounded stressed. He grabbed the roof and tried to stick it back on. “How much time do we have?” He asked Jaehee.

“Thirty seconds.”

“Thirty seconds!?” You exclaimed. “Hurry Jumin stick it back on!!!” You desperately tried to scrape the excess frosting off the wall of the house. Looks like you were losing this one.

“And time!”

You set the frosting bag down. You couldn’t stop giggling. You glanced over at Yoosung’s. It looked so good it could have been on the front of the ‘build your own’ kits. “Look at ours!” You told him, trying to contain your laughter.

The second you all turned to look the roof caved in and fell again. “It... has a skylight.” Jumin explained, trying to make up an excuse for why you would be missing HALF the roof.

“Why is there all that snow on the one side?” Yoosung asked. He seemed genuinely confused.

“Uh... blizzard came in from the North,” you explained.

Jumin chuckled at that one.

“Well that’s an awful place to have a skylight then. Wouldn’t it snow all over the house?” Why did Yoosung think this design was intentional? Did he hear all your frantic squealing?

“Uh... creativity.” Jumin shrugged. “We don’t need a judge. You can send the judge away. We can just give this one to Yoosung.” His cheeks were bright red; he obviously did not want to show off the current house, fully in shambles because of the two of you. It was honestly hysterical.

“And for your prize Yoosung we got you a LOLOL gift card!” You cheered, handing the card to Yoosung. He thanked the two of you for letting him join and gave you both a quick little hug. He was the absolute sweetest.

“We’ve got another comment this time around,” Jumin informed you, grabbing onto your hand and shifting closer to you to get more comfortable.

“Okay, you wanna read it?”

Jumin scooted closer to the screen so he could read it better. “They say ‘Hi! I love you two so much. You seem like the sweetest couple. Will you be my mom and dad?’” Jumin turned to look at you. “I don’t quite understand how that works.” Back to the camera. “You want us to adopt you?”

“Oh! Thank you for the message. Uhm, Honey, I think they mean like ‘internet mom and dad’” you explained.

“What’s that?”

“No adoption necessary. Just like... you know what? I don’t know how to explain it. I’d love to be your mom, so long as you don’t expect me to do anything ,” you told the camera, smiling widely.

“Sure okay. Then I can handle the role of dad.” Jumin shrugged. “We’re going to go for a five minute break now and then bring back some more guests for even more fun activities.”

You were super excited to bring in Jaehee and V. You were going to ask them to be the baby’s godparents. It was so exciting and so special, but right now, your main focus was that during this break you had to pee.

Part 2 coming soon :))

#mystic messenger #mysme #Jumin han #// OOOPS FORGOT TO ADD TAGS #// SHOUTOUT TO THE FOLLOWERS WHO ALREADY SAW THIS LOL #itsannaslife

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ajokeformur-ray · 3 years

Text

I watched Joker tonight and typed out my thoughts as they occurred to me. Unedited; typos are guaranteed. I did this a few months ago and really enjoyed looking back at my thought process and I wanted to do it again so that I can look back and know that what I feel is real and true in my darkest times.

You're welcome to skip this; it's under a cut for ease of doing so. Warnings for occasional sexual comment lmao. There’s no self shipping in this, I don’t think.

word count: 2, 575.

I’M SOBBING and I’ve only just pressed play.

Heart squeeze Chest much ow

THERE HE IS

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Nooooo baby omg don’t pretend - let yourself hurt if it hurts. Don’t pretend.

Carnival Carnival Carnivalllllllll 😍😍😍😍😍

I am a Simp for one clown and his name is Carnival

Someone help him, I????

That sign hit Arthur as hard as my love for him did ksksksk

MY EYES BE LEAKIN💔💔💔💔💔

bb nooooo

Oh honey let me kiss those bruises and replace the marks of violence with love, hm? You’re safe with me.

Breathe, my love. Don’t fight the laughter. Let it out, let yourself go.

Screams into a pillow because????? much sad must kiss

“have you been keeping up with your journal?” LIKE HE HAS TIME

oHHHHH boi’s close to losing his shit

Do it, Artie. Give ‘em hell.

“I think I did” YOU TELL HER!!💖💖💖

I want to be his cigarette. Where’s Satan??? I got a new deal for my blackened soul which he took at half price😂😂😂😂

I’d have my hand between the door and his head so fuckin fast I swear

“I just don’t wanna feel so bad anymore” yep SAME

ohhhh peekaboo🥺🥺🥺

this makes me giggle ksksksk i watch this scene when i feel sad bc it always makes me happy for the time it’s on

he’s so good with kids; he doesn’t have to try and think about what’s funny, he just does it, he’s himself and it works

FUCK OFF LADY CAN’T YOU SEE HE’S STRUGGLING????

give

him

back

his

card

casually wrinkling my nose against tears lmao

ohhh the way he looks up at those stairs from the bottom

i can feel his exhaustion

me too, my love

step step step step

god i wanna get him the fuck outta gotham

and into my arms and a soft, warm blanket

“eat. you need to eat” LITERALLY WHAT I TELL MYSELF EVERY DAY IN HIS VOICE BC OTHERWISE I JUST WOULDNT EAT???? I’m losing so much weight asdfghjk its not enough tho

SUPAH RATS

Did Arthur come up w that joke or was it actually a Murray joke????

HIS VOICE IS SO SOFT IM CRY??🥺🥺🥺🥺

“I WAS PUT HERE TO SPREAD JOY AND LAUGHTER”

YOU DO BABY, YOU DO!!!! EVERY FUCKING DAY!!!!

go deepthroat a cactus randall - youre already a bit of a prick so🙃🙃🙃

“THE GUYS THINNK YOU’RE A FREAK BUT I LIKE YOU”

HOYT. YOU CAN GO SIT ON A CACTUS TOO

FUCK OFF

😡😡😡😡

“WHY WOULD ANYONE STEAL A SIGN”//”WHY DOES ANYONE DO ANYTIHNG?” HOYT YOU’RE SO FUCKING ILLOGICAL HERE IM????? ERIKA DOES NOT (ALSO WILL NOT LMAO IM A STUBBORN BIITCH) COMPUTE

Can arthur fuck me like he pounds the trash/????🥵🥵👀

those dark curls.... that crooked tooth... must kiss.🥺🥺🥺

pennys casual cruelty makes me so fucking angry

foreshadowingggggg ~ *JAZZ HANDS*

ugh the way he dances with that gun im👀🥵🥵🥵

he enjoys the power of it and his breathing gets deeper asdfghjk

clumsy baby omggggg i just COOED 🥺🥺🥺🥺

okay maybe im stupid but i genuinely dont understand this “senior who needs to graduate” skit i’m??? how is being an intro to western civ student funny im???? someone explain???

but also dont bc fuck that guy lmao arthur’s hilarious

true millenial humour (and brit humour lmao we’re dark asf)

THE WAY ARTIE TWIRLS HIS FINGERS AROUND HIS HAIR AND DANCES IN HIS SEAT IM???🥺🥺🥺

wanna curl up on his lap at night when hes writing and go to sleep with a

blanket around our bodies🥺🥺🥺🥺

when arthur wears a shirt at home you KNOW it’s a daydream

THAT CROOKED TOOTH IM WANT KISS.

WAIT IS IT CALLED STAND UP COMEDY BC YOU STAND UP... AND ITS COMEDY???

23 FUCKING YEARS, PEOPLE... TO REALISE THAT🙄

WHEN CARNIVAL CAME ON SCREEN I NTHE HOSPITAL I MADE A PORNOGRAPHIC NOISE LMAO I LOVE HIM SO MUCH

IF YOURE HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT, SHOOT MURRAY

WOOPS WRONG LYRICS

😂

“doctor of laughter”🥺🥺🥺🥺

doctor i have a case of the Big Sad can you... do an exam? 😉😏

NO BB DONT BEAT YOUR HEAD UP THERES PRECIOUS CARGO IN THERE

in what world does chucking cold greasy chips in a girls hair being “nice”???

lmao fuck these guys

ohhh honey breathe. dont fight it, my love, just breathe.

my heart’s breaking for you, you sweet thing🥺🥺🥺

i love you so so so so so so so much ugh you’re an actual fucking angel

just breathe darling

i need to get you a cup of tea with honey in it, your throat must be so sore

ohhhh baby im so sorry

i’d take every single punch if i could

i’d die for you

i wish i could protect you

i wish i could look after you

and take all those hits

and kill those guys for you

im so sorry

sobbingggg

YES GOOD MAN THANK YOUUU

KILL THOSE ASSHOLES LMAO DESERVED IT

yeah i have a grey morality... im similar to deadpool in that way tbh

carnival comin’ to kill your insecurities

8 bullets in a 6 chamber???? mm-hm

DONT FORGET YOUR BAG THATS EVIDENCE

AND THE WIG

RUN BABY RUNNNNNNN

GO GO GO GOOOOOOOOOOOO

RUN LIKE THE WIND BULLSEYE

THE SOUND OF HIS FEET SLAPPING THE PAVEMENT IM👀

OOOOOH JOKER’S WAKIN’ UUUUUUP

fuck he’s so hypnotic

the way he runs his hand down his lower stomach asdfghj🥵

must kiss the inner tendons on his wrists and lick the blood off his face

must kiss

he moves like water

fuck hes so fluid

bathroom scene = the scene in which my heart and vagina clench at the same time

im WANT

T POSEEEEEEEE

“i still owe you for that, dont i?”

PUNCH OUT IS MY FAVOURITE THING E V E R

D O N T S M I LE

UGH I FUCKING HATE being told to smile if i don’t fucking want to so BIG mood

PLEASE SHUSH ME THE WAY YOU JUST SHUSHED PENNY IM???

but also dont lmao bc i’ll think you’re mad at me and i’ll hide in the bedroom for the rest of the day lmao i’m sensitive✨✨✨

i wanna sit on his lap and still his bouncing knees

“thats not funny”

fuck off penny yes it is

I JUST CHOKED ON MY COFFEE IM???

“but i do” god the P O W E R

ugh that fucking sexist piece of shit comedian can choke “women look at sex like buying a car” 🤢🤮🤢🤢🤮

chauvinistic pigs can die thanks

his lil trip upstage im cry🥺🥺🥺

ohhh baby. just breathe, darling. it’s okay to be scared. dont fight it. just breathe.

he and i both cover our mouths when we laugh/smile in the exact same way and it makes me feel closer to him

how can they think hes laughing at himself when hes literally gagging????

people only see what they wanna

the Penny imitation is👌👌👌

s m i l e

i remember when i came home from seeing this for the first time, i got home and dropped to my knees to cry in the bathroom. it was such an emotional release and so much love and i played smile to try to make myself smile but i only made myself cry harder lmaooooo ~

smile and thats life are my go-to songs if i gotta cheer tf up

danger sign = neither works

he looks so soft after his “date”🥺🥺🥺

“thats life” yeah but murray you dont even leave the studio so how do you know????

ngl arthur’s anger scares me.

anyone so much as raise their voice at me and i’ll cry really bad and i will shut myself away for the rest of the day and quiet anger terrifies me so his banging abt in the kitchen would freak me tf out😲

angry bb😭

he controls his anger so fast though omgggg ~

that soft please sends me

idk where it sends me lmao

down below probably

BARE FACED CARNIVAL OMG THIS SCENE IS SO CUTE

I LOVE THE MATCHING COLOURS ON ARTHUR AND BRUCE TOO ???

okay but the implication that arthur always carries a clown nose on him is🥺🥺🥺

hes such a good clown im?????

lmao im enjoying the show more than bruce is skskskk

arthur’s lil chuckle makes me🥺

his HUMMING im??? soft?????

his brows are so strong and dark omggg ~ he’s so beautiful

OKAY i’ll be honest i’ve seen this alfred/bruce scene and the thomas bathroom scene later on and the penny flashback scene a 100 times and i still dont fucking understand what did or didnt happen regarding arthur’s parentage im????

ive seen interpretations to say he is thomas’ son and some to say he isnt and i still cant decide so? im stupid i guess 🙃

“a clown thing?” the s a s s

“it’s exit only” yeah so’s my ass🙃

if i was there in the hospital room i woulda turned that tv off as soon as i realised what clip was gonna play

murray’s cruelty is d i s g u s t i n g

lmao hes an asshole

arthurs lil clap from joyyyyy ~ 🥺🥺🥺

did i say murray???

i meant m u r r a t

🙃🙃🙃

sneaky baby

wayne hall either has super bad security or arthurs v quick on his feet

🤔🤔🤔🤔

he looks so good in red omggg ~

f o r e s h a d o w i n g

arthurs smile when hes watching chaplin is how he smiles when we all gush to each other abt him and ourselves!!!

hes so cuuuuuute🥺🥺🥺🥺😭😭😍😍😍🥰🥰🥰

“told me what”

ohhhh honey🥺🥺 im so sorry. “crazy” is a trigger word for arthur; it made him start laughing in the bathroom with thomas

“touch my son again ill fucking kill you” yeah?? touch my arthur again and i’ll fucking kill you🙃🙃🙃🙃

^^^ that ones a joke do not come at me

the clerk in arkham was nice to arthur - he, gary and sophie are the good gothamites.

none of it was enough to stop his descent into joker, though, and i’d even say it was too late right at the beginning of the film, too...

his sock puppet thingy “they cut all those” is such a Joker thing to doooo ~

the way arthur’s laughing in the hall at arkham turns into sobbing is gut-wrenching omg the poor thing😭

i wanna hug him and protect him and help him to process this in a healthy way

sweetheart, if i could take all of your pain and put it onto me... i so would. i’d do it in a heartbeat.

i wanna get you into a hot shower, make you some food and sit and listen to you. we can either sit in silence or you can talk to me, my love, and you will be heard and understood and loved.

“i had a bad day”

IT’S OKAY I DIDNT NEED MY HEART ANYWAY OMG YOU POOR SWEET INNOCENT THING IM LOVE YOU🥺💔

THAT ENTIRE LATE NIGHT SCENE LAUGH/SOBBING GOT ME -

💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

i just wanna hold you and protect you and help you and love you

I’m so fucking sorry, darling. i wish i could take it all away from you

“i havent been happy one minute of my entire fucking life”

NO ONE SHOULD LOOK THAT ANGELIC AFTER COMMITING MATRICIDE IM????

get

that

fucking

gun

away

from

your

face

boi dont test me ill fucking go feral or - no, tell you what, i’ll point the gun at me and see how you like it

im looking respectfully at the green speckled undies scene....👀👀👀

“coming” 😏😏😏

“my mum died im celebrating” and “i stopped taking my medication” and you STILL stayed in the apartment with Arthur????? dudes those are 🚨🚨🚨 signs

woe betide anyone who underestimates arthur fleck lmaoooo

randalls death scene makes me laugh every time omg i feel so vindictive

get WRECKED

i wanna lick the blood off his face. i really want to

ngl i think i have a blood kink...

“dont look just go” ME WITH MY ACNE WHEN I SEE IT IN THE MIRROR 😂😂😂😂

JOKERJOKERJOKERJOKER

ASDFGHJKL

ERIKA.EXE HAS STOPPED WORKING

JOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERJOKERRRRRR

😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 MY BABY MY MAN OMG THERE HE IS IM CRY???????😭🥺😭🥺😭🥺

my mind is literally blank rn im just staring and crying and smiling so hard my face hurts????? im love him so so so so much

sweet thing’s so used to pain he gets HIT BY A CAR AND KEEPS GOING????

I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU

hghhhhhhhhhhhhhh

euirrrrrrgkjbgkfbirsghigrbugr

*incoherent keyboardsmash to portray utter love*

ohhh baby no dont cry. oh honey😭 i wanna sit on your lap and kiss your tears away

“i love dr sally”

you have a WIFE at home

“DO YOU REMEMBER?” THAT WAS YOUR CUE TO APOLOGISE LMAO GET FUCKED MURRAT

he’s so CUTE

omgggg ~

my hearts gonna give out its SQUEEZING SO HARD IT HURTS

YOU MOCK THEM, BABY!!! THEY GOT IT COMING

“i wanna get it right” hes so passionate

my comments have deceased in number bc im just too starstruck and in love to even think clearly lmao

jokers all i know rn and this is the most peaceful ive felt in WEEKS

im sobbing

ugh fuck this hurts so BAD

youre speaking the truth, darling. im so so proud of you and i love you so much

“THEY COULDNT CARRY A TUNE TO SAVE THEIR LIVES” LMAO INSIDE JOKESSS

literally sobbing right now ugh what the fuck youre in so much pain and in the middle of a breakdown and no one saw you

ugh baby im so sorry, you deserve so much better

you tried so hard and you were gonna fall no matter what

IN THE WHITE ROOM

“hi” baby they cant hear you but im COOING 🥺🥺🥺🥺

you’re so fucking cute

say the word and ill burn gotham to the fucking ground for you

i wanna sit atop that car and cradle your head in my lap and wipe the blood off your face and help you stand up and be there for you and and and😭😭😭😭😭😭 i love you so so so much.

i’d be so much worse off without you in my life. you brought a splash of colour which has never dimmed or faded. it never will.

b l o o d s m i l e

im wearing my inside on the outside now and it still hurts

angel💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

i see you and your pain. i love you.

i see you, angel.

his genuine laughter is🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

that cute lil “ksksks” he does im🥺🥺🥺

i always laugh with him omg the two of us are laughing together ugh its the closest i will ever get to sharing in his joy

t h a t ‘s l i f e

i love the hallway daaaaaaaaaaaaaance ~

them hips dont lie😉😉😉

i love you i love you i love you i love you omg the sun’s like a halo ugh i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you im singing along to thats life while i type out how much i love you at 220am lmaooooo ~

i l o v e y o u

#erileck #<- ref tag #arthur fleck #joker 2019 #erika talks

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redxblueihateloveyou · 4 years

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Actually for me it's pretty weird that the most popular ship in Free! is Makoharu. I mean, they give me like zero romantic vibes, if not Rinharu I would've definitely shipped Sourin. It's the main reason I hated Sousuke when I watched 2nd season for the first time - I saw him as a threat for Rinharu (now I just don't like him that much, but I decided to let Rin has his best friend, lol). Maybe it's just me loving rivals to lovers :)

Well.. for me Free! was never that kind of anime where there are other ships, but honestly after several years of watching anime and lately discovering that people ship Wei Wuxian with Jiang Cheng I kinda lost my faith in people lol And yes, I also truly don’t get those ships, where there are zero romantic vibes, but I got used to seeing this already.

I think I’ve talked about Makoharu only once, I usually don’t do it cause as a ship it’s so illogical to me that I just don’t see the point of wasting time on this lol I feel like it’s gonna be long answer so I’ll split it and after “***” I’ll talk about my bro-rinharu-shipper Sousuke.

I’m not gonna throw a debate if it’s the most popular ship or not, but I just want to say that I don’t think that it's really called shipping Makoto and Haru, since firstly, let’s talk about Makoto as a character (which is the main problem in this whole thing tbh) cause from what I saw the Makoto the MH fandom created has nothing to do with the real Makoto. Like the dude is scared of dogs, ghosts, bees, water and I forgot what else; covers his eyes when he sees anyone even in swim trunks and gets embarrassed easier than a nun (apparently you can’t even unbutton the collar of your freaking jacket!!!!!!!!!!! oh lord!!!!!!); crumbles under everyone in this anime including Hiyori and can’t even talk back.

And suddenly like half of this fandom thinks that Makoto is a dominant top apparently. We seriously laughed our asses off seeing that, I mean even my mom (who’s a teacher btw). I’m like... I have a sister who’s majored in psychology and I myself in literature (like I seriously promise we ain’t stupid) and we just seriously don’t understand.. In what Tarzan’s ass does he suit this description? Dude can’t even answer properly while being offended. Like maybe they like Makoto’s twin brother? Because real Makoto does not have any dangerous dark side, seriously, this ain’t “8 dogs of the east” lmao.

I appreciate their friendship at times, but I never was a fan of him, because I don’t really like people who treat everyone equally (friends and strangers) and think that some asshole deserves as much love as the closest friend. I just don’t understand this life position and don’t like those “world peace” guys anyway. I mean, that fish died moment in the books was when my brain died honestly. Like I get it, dude is sensitive, but... seriously?

And for me being kind is not really a personality. I mean, hell, sometimes it’s no good to be kind. There is a fine line between being kind and being a mop you know.

And sometimes his behavior is really cringy to me. Like during the funeral and during Haru passing out in the book and during many things that are very serious. I just don’t think he’s the person you can rely on at times. I mean at first I thought he’s a steady shoulder, but somehow in all serious situations he doesn’t do anything useful.

Like I might be in the minority here, but to me when you know very well that you panic in the ocean you don’t go there trying to save somebody, it’s not brave, it’s just plain stupid (like it’s not like the tent was far, it was fucking next to him, all he had to do is wake up a pro) so by the end we had to rescue two instead of one, just because he’s dumb af.

He also panics a lot which I really hate on people. I’m sorry but like panicking ppl are the only worst. It reminds me of one of my life situation when my sister was badly hurt and we needed to keep our heads cool to act quickly and do what was necessary asap. And I’ve seen ppl behave like Makoto in situations like this and man it’s seriously no fun, it’s annoying. Like when you need to help somebody and someone panics beside you it pisses you off. And he does it even in little things like when he yelled Haru in the ear while driving JUST BECAUSE A CAR IN FRONT OF THEM BRAKED I mean omfg I would seriously yell “shut the fuck up, you pussy!”

And it all honestly keeps getting worse and worse like the way he’s written, his behavior just buffles me so much. Makoto in s3 just murdered me tbh. Like he didn’t help with anything, he didn’t bring anything to the plot, you can just erase him, he only sat there anyways. And the way they pulled his “dream” out of his ass was just a second-hand embarrassment tbh. And he’s not even Haru’s emotional support anymore. He’s just... I don’t get it. There were literally scenes where he was third-wheeling or just forced into that looked laughable.

Which brings me to the second point. From what I saw many of Makoharu fans are mostly Makoto fans, so they just want what’s good for him, and since he has no life goals whatsoever (like after he dropped his “I dream of making children like swimming” thingy like a hot potato and was like “training children.. but look at Rin and Haru” I really lost my last marbles watching him) they apparently don’t care for what Haru’s dream is and that he said openly that he wants a future with Rin.

Like I get that everyone has their tastes, but like what.. two people who are crazy about each other since twelve and blossomed a dream of having a future together and the thought of being with each other got them through and they finally have what they wanted.. this is not a trend anymore? Mutual romantic love is not a trend anymore? Like I even without novelization can see that (and I quote Rin word for word here) that “every time he sees Haru his heart beats so fast he can’t calm down” and quote “Haru sees Rin and he’s shaking, he closes his eyes desperately trying get rid of the image, but the pain in his chest doesn’t go away”.

I am personally very happy that Rinharu are finally together and will be doing what they wanted in their life by each other’s side, cause they’ve been dreaming about it for too long, they’ve been thinking about it for years. So not wanting them to have that is very weird for me. And the argument that Makoto somehow better than Rin for Haru is so invalid, I always laugh. I guess it depends on what you want for yourself. But honestly like you guys better find someone who make you want to reach for the stars and make you heart skip a bit everytime you see him.

So I as a huge fan of Haru want my boy to fly and now I have all the canon proof for those who were blind that Rin is the only one (been said) who makes him feel that way. So all those anons who kept writing to me how relay with Sosuke, with Rei and what baffled me the most swimming with Ikuya was just as emotional for them can finally shut it (lmao I’m sorry).

***

Now... Sousuke, my bro, the first Rinharu shipper on the village who helped them to get together is a threat? Okay. Well, I actually like s2, there are some dumb episodes but s2 actually to me showed how rinharu relationships are different from anyone else. There are literally two whole episodes and several scenes of how the bROMANCE prevails over BROmance.

Sousuke and Rin have typical brothers relationship. From their secret handshakes “parent trap” style to the fact that they draw them exactly the same with his real brother. I mean I don’t know if anyone noticed, but in 3x11 they drew Sousuke doing the exact same teasing move with Rin, that his older brother did to him in 3x01, and it’s definitely not a coincidence. Which means he treats him like his little bro, and not just that. I have lots of proof.

You know, I had a friend back at university who had an older brother who she was very close with and she kept telling me about how he kept testing her boyfriends if they’re good enough... I mean Sousuke was doing it with Haru since Rin has told him that he has found his one and only. And it never ever looked like he was possessive of Rin and was like “he’s mine”, it was always like “he’s yours so make sure you make him happy you loser”, he even stalked Haru to see if he still swims alright which is really funny (like okay dad), so by the end of the season when Rin lovingly looks at Haru and says it was all worth it, Sousuke looks very content like he was sure that they’re all good now.

And that moment like in Yakusoku where Rin dropped Sousuke as soon as he saw Haru, I honestly don’t think it’s the kind of jealousy people think it is. It’s like if I asked my sister “do u want to see the new avengers movie” and she’d answer “sorry, I already promised to go with my boyfriend” (not that this would ever happen, but let’s imagine that she found herself her nanase) I would be fucking upset too, but I would kinda get it (if it’s a love of her life I mean). Or like literally imagine you lived with your best friend for years and suddenly she wants to move in with he boo. I mean it happens sometimes. But it’s not the jealousy really, he’s just sad because he knows that he needs to let Rin go and he won’t spend as much time with him as he did before. Sousuke knows how much Rin loves Haru, plus after he saw that Haru is as good as Rin told him, he started to like him himself so he was worried about both of them.

And I love Sousuke, he’s our godmother. I’d rather have him on the international team than Ikuya but he sadly he doesn’t swim breaststroke or back and we only have one butterfly and one freestyle spot xD

I’m sincerely saying as a person with two siblings that I really don’t see it. It’s just there’s a huge difference between brothers and lovers. And you can’t call Harurin bros. It’s just laughable. Even if you haven’t read anything and just watched the anime.

I mean I think it’s easier to see if you try to imagine Haru in Sousuke’s place in any Sourin scene and see how it would’ve went then. Like do you remember when Sousuke asked for cola and Rin went to get one and there was only one can left so they rock-paper-scissored it and Rin won and drank it?

Now imagine if Haru was there in Sousuke’s place. I can tell you 100% that Rin would’ve just given him the can. And then he would’ve looked at him with that face he makes when he’s content just by watching Haru eat, you know.

I mean it just how I see it. And there are a lot of comparable scenes in s2 that bring me lots of evil joy, but I won’t tell lmao.

But as I said before to me there’s a huge difference between bromances and bromances. So I mostly don’t get most of these ships. I don’t understand anything in this world apparently lol but I only see Rinharu since the first time I’ve watched it, and then I’ve read everything and realized that I’m right, so I’m ok with all this xD

#answered #lissara22 #rinharu #Free!#free! road to the world #harurin #I know it looks like i hate makoto but i don't i just don't understand what to like there tbh lol #sorry not sorry #thanks for the english btw love #rin matsuoka #nanase haruka #yamazaki sousuke

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