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sharlsworld · 2 months

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birthday girl - f1 grid

⍟ charles leclerc x fem!wolff!reader

⍟ it’s an f1 holiday, y/n wolff’s birthday. a series of birthday posts made by a bunch of people involved with f1.

fc: various girls from pinterest

warnings: none really tbh just a age gap (it’s my fathers fault for making me like this)

authors note: idk what i’m doing i’m bored out of my mind and have nothing better to do. lmk if i should keep doing these or not, p.s there’s google translated french and spanish 😭

charles_leclerc

liked by carlossainz55 and 6,938,012 others

charles_leclerc Mon cœur, mon amour, mon trésor, there truly aren’t enough words in the human vocabulary to describe my love for you. I’ve had my eye on you before we even spoke to each other, there’s no doubt in my mind that we will spend eternity together. Here’s to another year around the sun, happy 22nd birthday chérie, my love for you is infinite. ♥️

yn thank you honey, i love you bigger then the sky 💘

↳ charles_leclerc My love for you is everlasting chérie ♥️

landonorris you two make me sick

↳ yn good stay stick

scuderiaferrari Happy birthday y/n! Wishing you a year full of happiness and health beautiful girl! ❤️🥳

♥︎ by author & yn

sharls_lerklerk “there’s no doubt in my mind that we will spend eternity together” the highways lookin real cozy 🥰🥰

charlotte2304 Happy birthday beautiful y/n I love you to the moon and back 💞

♥︎ by author & yn

yn you really like those faceless pictures huh? 😭

↳ charles_leclerc I just love your hair so much chérie

arthur_leclerc and to think that 4 years ago you were blushing at the fact she even looked at you

↳ lorenzotl He still does

lordperceval him not responding to anyone’s comment accept hers 😭

lewishamilton

liked by glenpowell and 5,182,732 others

lewishamilton My honorary sister, i’ve known you since you were 10 years old and it’s been so amazing watching you grow into such a good person. Thank you for always supporting me, baking me sweets and making sure I don’t get growled at for eating so much sugar, celebrating with me, watching roscoe, and always being there for me no matter what. Happy birthday y/n, I couldn’t have asked for a better honorary sister than you. I love you to the moon and back ❤️

yn thank you so much lew, your the big brother i never got. i love you so so much 💞

♥︎ by author

beloved.hamilton i hold there sibling duo so close to my heart 🥹

mercedesamgf1 Our paddock princess!! Wishing you the happiest birthday sweetheart 🥰💙

♥︎ by author & yn

futurewag822 i love how everyone loves y/n cause same 😭

georgerussell63 Awh you old sap, happy birthday y/n i love you lots thank you for always being so sweet and supportive 💙

♥︎ by author & yn

↳ yn thank you george i love you 💞

carlossainz55

liked by olliebearman and 1,092,566 others

carlossainz55 Mi querida amiga, feliz cumpleaños! I wish you nothing but the best in life, i’ve never met someone as sweet, welcoming, caring, and funny as you. I will always cherish our friendship, I cannot wait to make more memories with you in the years to come. Te quiero mucho mi querida amiga ❤️

yn thank you carlito i love you bunches ❤️

♥︎ by author

hoeforsainzzz i want to be like y/n when i grow up no cappy 😭

charles_leclerc Why do you have so many pictures of me and y/n?

↳ carlossainz55 It’s my job as the third wheel mate

↳ yn your the best third wheel carlito

landonorris all i got for my birthday was a “happy birthday lando!” 😐 but she gets a WHOLE PARAGRAPH

↳ yn just say your jealous

carlossainzoficial Feliz cumpleaños y/n! Enjoy your special day ❤️

↳ yn thank you better carlos ❤️

↳ carlossainz55 wow.

landonorris

liked by tomholland2013 and 1,223,704 others

landonorris happy birthday short stack, your one rude but funny, mean but pretty, ruthless but kind hearted girl. thank you for making me feel tall, if you ever find yourself single one day, you have my number 😉 i love you bunches y/n ❤️

charles_leclerc thats not funny 😐 no one’s laughing.

yn thank you norizz 🥹 i love you many bunches more ❤️

↳ charles_leclerc don’t make me lock you in the room all day

mclaren Happy birthday to our favorite guest! Your welcome anytime y/n 😉🧡

↳ scuderiaferrari No. She’s not aloud to leave us ever.

↳ mercedesamgf1 Are we forgetting who raised her? 🤣

↳ yn guys stop there’s enough of me for everyone 🤗

↳ charles_leclerc N O.

alex_albon she makes charles look tall

↳ charles_leclerc My ego is hurt

landolove all the admins fighting over y/n made my week 😭

oscarpiastri Happy birthday y/n 🧡

↳ yn thank you osc ❤️

lilymhe

liked by alex_albon and 907,125 others

lilymhe wishing my best friend an amazing birthday, i’m forever grateful for f1 bringing us together. i’ve never had such an amazing friend like you, i hold our friendship so close to my heart. i love you past the moon and beyond the stars ❤️

yn i love you lily ❤️

↳ lilymhe i love you more 😘❤️

alex_albon happy birthday ig, your pretty funny ig. your a good friend ig and amazing baker ig. I GUESS i love you. ❤️🙄

↳ yn i guess i love you 🙄 thank you ig ❤️

charles_leclerc lily you are not invited to dinner tonight. i would like to spend the night with my girlfriend and not watch her spend the whole night with you and kika

↳ lilymhe just mad your girl loves me & kika more then you 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

↳ francisca.cgomes bro thinks that’s his girlfriend 🤣🤣🤣🤣

↳ yn can’t wait to see you lovely ladies tonight 😉

↳ charles_leclerc PLEASE stop

↳ pierregasly we’re BEGGING

↳ alex_albon on our KNEES

francisca.cgomes

liked by pierregasly and 920,104 others

francisca.cgomes my dearest friend, you’ve helped me more in more ways then you’ll ever know. i’ve been so lucky to call you my best friend since we were little girls, i love you so so so much y/n. happy birthday big booty judy ❤️

yn i love you for infinity kika ❤️

♥︎ by author

↳ francisca.cgomes i love you more then infinity ❤️

pierregasly happy birthday to the biggest pain in my ass i love you ❤️

♥︎ by author & yn

↳ yn thanks for always distributing my beauty sleep pear i love you more ❤️

landosfootfungus i want to be y/n

↳ danielricciardo me too 😔

charles_leclerc big booty indeed

♥︎ by author

lilymhe our little girl is growing up on us 🥹

↳ francisca.cgomes times flying 😔

iheartyn big booty judy 😭

liked by maxverstappen1 and 20,077,284

f1 Before the day is over we would love to wish our paddock princess a very happy 22nd birthday! We hope your day was filled with nothing but love and happiness, we hope your day was as perfect as you are! 🤍

yn thank you admin 🥹❤️

♥︎ by author

maxverstappen1 Happy birthday to the biggest pain in my ass. I love you more then you know y/n ❤️

♥︎ by author

↳ yn max…this is the sweetest thing you’ve ever said to me 🥹❤️

olliebearman Happy birthday y/n, thank you for being so kind and baking me so much sweets i’ll definitely get a talking to about 😂❤️

♥︎ by author

↳ yn don’t worry ollie i won’t let your trainer growl at you 😭

fernandoalo_oficial Happy birthday to my favorite girl ever ❤️

♥︎ by author

↳ yn nando stop 🥹 I LOVE YOU

↳ fernandoalo_oficial I LOVE YOU MORE Y/N 😂❤️

danielricciardo Happy birthday sunshine, i love you lots. Pretty glad to know someone like you 🌞

♥︎ by author

↳ yn i love you more danny ❤️

yukitsunoda0511 Happy birthday y/n thank you for always making me laugh ❤️

♥︎ by author

↳ yn thank you yuki ❤️

i got lazy towards the end 😭 lmk what you think.

#charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc smau #f1 x reader #fernando alonso #daniel ricciardo #lewis hamilton #lando norris #yuki tsunoda #pierre gasly #f1 smau #alex albon #carlos sainz #charles leclerc imagine

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exrellian · 2 months

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Replaced MC AU

Authors Note: the amount of support I’m getting is insane and I am so thankful! I didn’t expect my first series to blow up like this! Comment if you would like to be added to the tag list (which is something I never expected to have) and of course, enjoy part four!!

TW: none really except MC and ??? Shit talking the brothers and royals

Part 1-Part 2-Part 3-Part 4(you are here)

Someone who feels the same way

??? POV

“Chef! There is someone sleeping in the alleyway next to the restaurant!” A demon said, “if you let homeless people just sleep outside people are going to stop eating here. This is a prestigious restaurant, not a homeless shelter.” The noble demon scoffed at the other

“I will go take care of it.” The chef sighed, grabbing his coat and umbrella from his office before exiting the restaurant and checking the alley beside it. Sure enough, there lays a boy, looking to be physically around the same age as the chef, and he looks like shit

“How long do you plan on sitting in the alley? Humans get sick easily.” The demon spoke, moving his umbrella to cover the soaked boy

“You gonna eat me?” the human asked, not even moving his head up to look at the demon

“Eat you? Ew.”

“Don’t mess with me, I know how demons are.” The chef shook his head, leaning against the wall across from MC

“If I was going to eat you I would have done so already. Aren’t you the precious little exchange student? Weird to see you without one of your guard dogs.” He scoffs as he mentions the seven lords

“Please don’t bring me back there. Who knows what they will do if they found out I was causing a noble demon trouble” MC sputtered, still not making eye contact with the mystery demon

“Ew.”

“Ew?”

“Those lords are as incompetent as the young prince who rules them.” The demon replied with a roll of his eyes “I’m Lawrence by the way. Why don’t you come into the restaurant and get cleaned up, the back room should have some spare clothes since yours are… gross”

“Are you sure your boss would be okay with that?”

“My boss? No, he won’t mind” Lawrence tosses his jacket at MC, still covering both of them with the umbrella

“If you’re sheltering me with an umbrella why do I need a jacket?”

“Put the hood up, hide your face and, since I wear this jacket often it should mask your scent as a human. A lot of noble demons are dining here, if you don’t want the lords knowing you’re here you best hide.” Lawrence explains, helping MC up off the ground

“Why are you helping me? You could have killed me at least five different times now”

“Because you looked pathetic. And I can’t have homeless people outside the restaurant, it will make it look… poor”

Small time skip

MCs POV, first person

I finished getting changed after successfully sneaking in… but now what? Sure I’m all cleaned up but was it all just to go out onto the streets again? Sure I could go to Purgatory Hall but who knows if they have been manipulated by Amelia too. I need to get a job and find a place to stay, even if I just hotel jump until the end of my time here…

“The uniform looks good on you.” A voice spoke from the door behind me “ready to get working?”

“What? Your… offering me a job here? But how will I go unnoticed!? And I’m a human, so won’t the demons be inclined to avoid this place with me working here!?” I ask, shocked at the sudden declaration that he was giving me a job

“An illusion spell, I put it in the uniform before you get changed. To me and any other demon you look and smell like a demon. No one will recognize you like this.” Lawrence explained, it’s as if he was prepared for this

“Oh… well I guess that makes sense, but why offer me a job? This just doesn’t seem right, you are a demon correct? Why help a useless human this much?” I asked, not fully trusting in this random demons intentions

“You ask so many questions, it’s annoying. I just felt like it, that’s all. This is my restaurant so I can give anyone I please a job.”

“Your restaurant!? You own this place!? The lords came to eat here many times, saying this was the fanciest restaurant in the Devildom!”

“If I could ban them from coming here I would. I had to work overtime any night you all came. That gluttony demon is a real problem for any restaurant he comes to. And don’t get me started on that prideful fuck, he can rot for all I care, he had the gall to tell me I was being too conservative with the serving sizes, at my own damn restaurant” Lawrence rants on and on, it was almost comforting to find someone who hates them as much as I do now “the only tolerable one is the young lords butler, at least he seems to have a shred of respect, unlike the other eight. Not even the prince can respect other people enough to not shout everything he says like he is the most important being in the three worlds”

“You seem to really hate them, don’t you?” I chuckle a bit at his tangent, not expecting someone who looks and acts like he does to go on such a heated rant

“Hate is such a… gentle word. I loathe them, they think they are the best demons ever because one of them was born into power and the other seven used to be angels. Well that doesn’t mean shit in the long run, and they will learn that sooner or later when their little exchange program backfires and the Celestial Realm fucks over both the Devildom and the human realm by extension. If there is one thing I loathe more than the nobles here in the Devildom, it’s the celestial realm” he sighs “we have gotten off topic, do you want the job or not? I live in a two bedroom apartment above the restaurant that you may stay in until you have made enough money to get your own place out until the exchange year comes to an end. Truthfully it would be foolish of you to refuse” he was right, it would be incredibly stupid to turn down this offer.

Tag list; @t-misaki @melpomenelurks @gallantys @skei2p @terodactu @atomsminecraft @cutest-tenshi

#obey me #obey me angst #replaced mc #obey me replaced au #obey me oc #obey me mc #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #obey me simeon #obey me solomon #obey me luke

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ohtobeleah · 3 months

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Was It Over? // Jake Seresin

-> Chapter Eleven: [The Man]

Summary: When Jake and Jensen go head to head over who means what yo you, things escalate to new heights, so much so that Jake lashes out and says something that may not be forgiven.

Warnings: Sick!reader. Breast cancer diagnosis. Jake Seresin x F!reader. Angst, hospital & medical inaccuracies. SLOW BURN ROMANCE/ Inaccurate medical information. Relationship turmoil. Mentions of religion. JEALOUS JAKE!

Word Count: 5.6K

Author Note: This chapter brings the total word count of this series to 50k....I cannot believe that an idea that began as a one-shot has turned into this. Thank you all so much for your support on this one. xxx

Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist

There was a brief moment right before your shower where Jake was able to step out into the hall to call his sister Jasmine. He knew the call he was about to make was going to be neither short, nor pleasant. But he also knew that deep down, you weren’t mentally prepared to tell your children you were sick. But the pair of you had to start somewhere. And that somewhere was Jake’s sister.

“What the FUCK is going on!” One single ring. One dial. That's how long it took Jake's sister to answer, hell, Jake thought it would have been sooner but he gave her a little good grace for potentially having to step out of whatever family dynamic she found herself in. “Mum said Y/n’s sick?”

“Did she say it like that?” Jake replied unamused as he found an empty chair to sit on in the waiting room area down the hall. He didn't want to stray too far away from your room. Although he knew that you were with the nurses, he couldn't find it inside himself to leave. If Jake tried hard enough, he could still see your bed socks at the end of your hospital bed.

“Uh–” Jasmine's apprehensive silence confirmed all Jake needed to know. “She may have said it with a little hope in her chest, mentioned the words dropped and dead in the same sentence of wishful thinking.” Jake couldn’t say he was surprised after the way Janeen had spoken so poorly about you directly to his face. He couldn't really imagine what she’d been saying to other members of the Seresin family. “But what's going on? I'm keeping an eye on the kids as much as I can but holy shit mum's just on a warpath–”

Fuck: Jake knew leaving the kids behind was a bad idea on his behalf. The guilt of running off on his children in the middle of the night was beginning to eat him alive. The idea of lying to them about your condition only made that guilt harder to rationalise.

“Okay, can you just promise me you won’t tell the kids?” Jake groaned into the phone. “Y/n doesn't want them to worry so she doesn't want to say too much.”

“Jake–” Jasmine's voice changed, the serious nature of the conversation at hand was beginning to shine through with ease. “She's alright, isn't she?” Jasmine asked as Jake let his elbows rest on top of his thighs. This whole situation, the newly found world of which you were living in was begging to give Jake the head spins. Keeping up was exhausting, but this wasn't about Jake now was it. “This is Y/n we’re talking about, she has to be alright.”

Unbeknownst to you, Jake had been reading all your files, all your reports, everything and anything he could get his hands on about your diagnosis. After all, he had been named your emergency contact not long after showing up. He’d made a convincing case. Jake knew a lot about your current situation. He knew the odds, chances, risks and possibilities.

“She's been diagnosed with Stage three A, triple positive grade three invasive doctoral carcinoma.” Jake explained to his sister who on the other end of the call, sat watching his youngest try to eat the sand from the sandpit Jake himself used to shit in as a child. “The oral chemo they had her started on caused a stroke, apparently it's a common side effect, to me they shouldn't be pumping people full of that crap if its gonna cause a fucking stroke forty percent of the time.”

Jake knew the silence on the other end of the line was due to an overload of information getting caught in his sister's cerebellum. It was a lot to take in, hell Jake still hadn’t really been given an opportunity to take it all in. since he found out he’d been go go go. He knew an impending moment of weakness mixed with overall exhaustion was coming. When that moment would come he wasn't sure.

“You’re lying–” Was all Jasmine said. Jake wished more than anything he could say he was.

“Fucked up thing to lie about Jas–” Jake responded softly as he listened to the hustle and bustle of the hospital wing his sat in. “She hadn’t been feeling well for a few months, Doctors say it's aggressive, feeds off her hormones and stuff.” Jake didn't understand a lot of it, but he was trying his best to navigate a field he wasn't an excerpt in. “She's in for a preventative double mastectomy on Christmas Eve. It would've been earlier but the strokes kinda set her back a few days.”

“Jake– I don't believe you, the kids–what about the kids, what do I tell them?” Jasmine couldn't comprehend the devastation this would cause on the already struggling family dynamic. You and Jake were meant to be, everyone knew that. But this whole separation, the miscommunication and overall fractures within your marriage were all major contributing factors as to why love just couldn’t be enough.

“Don't tell them anything, please, for the love of God Jas don't tell them anything, I just–” Jake let out a sigh of frustration as he ran his hand free hand through his hair. God he needed a haircut. “We just need a little time to process what's going on and Y/n–she's been doing this for too long on her own, I can’t keep letting her down so just, take a moment to breathe for me.”

“Holy fuck you aren’t kidding about any of this are you?” Jasmine with all her good graces and problematic marital issues of her own, looked over at where her husband sat with hers and Jake's father. The sight was enough to send a shiver down her spine. The man who raised her was not someone who Jasmine ever wanted her brother to become. Losing your wife to such a disease that was as unforgiving as it was inhumane could potentially be an origin story bubbling under the surface of Jake's skin.

“Jake–You don't get to turn into dad if this ends anything less than Y/n walking away from this cancer free Jake, your kids deserve to have a dad that won't treat them like burdens and mistakes.”

***~***~***~***~***~***~**

“Watch your step alright?” Our skulls are designed to cushion our brains. Our rib cages are specifically moulded to guard our hearts. The human body is built to protect our most vulnerable parts. At least, that’s how it’s supposed to work.

The way in which Jake helped to guide you out of the bathroom with his hand pressed firmly against the small of your back made your heart skip a beat. You held tightly onto his forearm with one hand and in the other? Was your IV poll, still pumping you full of antibiotics and fluids.

“I got it.” You tried to focus on just putting one foot in front of the other. That's what this whole thing was about right? This battle, this fight. It was all about putting one foot in front of the other. With Jake by your side, albeit with some underlying resentment still to be discussed, you felt as though those steps, small but meaningful in their own right, were made with intent and purpose to keep fighting. “Shit the air-con feels so weird on my head.” You chuckled to yourself as Jake shut the bathroom door behind the both of you.

“Yeah holy shit it's like–” As Jake's eyeline faltered from you to the figure standing over near the door, his heart sunk into his stomach. His face turned to stone as the green in his eyes, usually an emerald colour, darkened to something more pine-like. The half finished sentence that left your husband's mouth and tailed off into complete and utter silence was what got your attention the most. It wasn't like Jake to not say what was on his mind.

“What's up?” As you turned your head slowly, you saw the man who had been nothing but a pillar of support for you to lean on since your diagnosis. It was the man who had kept you above water when you felt like you’d been drowning in a sea of unprecedented mortality. “Jensen–” The shock and excitement in your tone was something Jake couldn't miss no matter how much he wanted to. “You came?”

Jake made no attempt to move as you shuffled forward, he stood still with his heart hammering inside his chest. He stood completely still as his thoughts carried him away into a world where nothing made sense to anyone. Into a world where he didn't have you, a world where for the last year he’d tasted of that very misery and hated every last second of it.

“I uh–” Jensen held out the bouquet of sweet peas, peonies and pansies he’d brought for you. The overwhelming colours and signature scents captivated the entire room with their freshness. “I wanted to stop by, see how you were doing, hope I'm not intruding?”

The body tends to adapt quickly to new circumstances and pressures it’s put under. It knows how to protect itself. But it can’t close off completely, or well—we’re not really living are we? Biology tends to override our fears, so we leave the door open, just a little…hoping like hell that it's worth the risk.

“Oh no, no we just finished up some DIY haircuts.” You beamed, the smile that ignited across your face was a smile Jake hadn't seen in years. A smile so pure and full of love that it couldn't ever be faked. “Jake, this is Jensen.” You introduced the two men who had played significant roles in your life, having no clue that they had both already met one another in the hall. “We met at the doctors office, as unfortunate as that sounds, it's been really nice to have someone who just, knows.” Jake slowly but surely aided you over to your bed before he made his way over to where Jensen stood watching idly. Assessing the situation unfolding before him. “Jensen convinced me to go to a few of those CCA meetings, although not my cup of tea–it's nice to know that that support system is there.”

Jake eyed Jensen and his bouquet of flowers off as he stepped closer and closer with a look Jensen couldn't quite read in his pine green eyes. The betrayal of love often has boundaries that people end up living with for the rest of their lives. For Jake, his betrayal and the consequences of his emotional ineptitude inside his marriage was starting to play out right before his very eyes.

He saw the potential that there was in fact another man. And oh boy did he hate it.

“And Jensen, this is Jake, my husband.” Jensen took subtle notice of the way you introduced Jake to him as your husband, not your ex-husband like you'd been referring to him as since the two of you first met. Something had changed, Jensen could sense it. But for as much as Jensen could sense the chemistry between you and Jake, Jake could see the way your eyes lit up with overjoyous surprise when you realised that the flowers Jensen held in his hand were in fact for you. “Are those, are those for me?”

“Oh–yeah.” Jensen beamed as he walked a little further into your room. “I thought they might bring a little light into your room but it seems that you have it pretty well decorated.” It was the small nod to the Christmas lights that hung around your room that made you smile even brighter as Jake made his way back over and helped you into bed. You could tell there was tension brewing just from his quietness alone. “And the new haircut suits you, good thing you don't have a weird ass head huh?”

“Hey Jarred–” Jake interrupted before you had a chance to reply, the way he intentionally called Jensen by a different name rubbed you the wrong way. The frown that cast itself across your face left little to Jake's imagination, but as he made sure you were as comfortable as could be in your bed, he kept going. “Nows, probably not a good time–”

Jensen looked around your room carefully, he knew the system well and what times were more common than not for nurses to do their daily rounds and check-ins. He knew that by the looks of things you had just showered and were probably settling in for the afternoon. If Jensen was correct in his assumption as he looked back towards where Jake stood at your bedside, he would assume that he couldn't have picked a better time to drop by.

“Seems like a pretty good time to me man, besides, why don't we let Y/n here make that call.” Jensen replied calmly as he went about finding a place for your flowers to go. Jensen could have played the safe card, he could have chosen to be the bigger person and not mention it, but he didn't really have a hell of alot to lose. After all, he was a dead man walking. What was the harm in stirring the pot a little where he still could. “Honestly, I didn't expect you to be here if I'm being completely honest.” Jensen smirked as he turned back to face Jake. You felt like your heart was about to explode right through your chest as you looked back and forth between the two men who had seemingly gotten into a mines bigger than yours contest on either side of your bedside. “Didn't think you knew your wife was sick–”

The silence was deafening as Jake thought about all the ways he could kill a man in one single motion. The rage he felt inside his chest was red hot jealousy. Jensen could practically see the steam spewing out of Jake's years.

“What my wife decides to share with me has nothing to do with you–” Jake growled, you could just see the way he was grinding his teeth. Jake's jawline had never seemed more profound. His knuckles were almost entirely white as he leaned against the railing of your hospital bed. Lowered down for convenience of getting in and out.

“It does when I’ve been the one listening to how much she wishes you loved her the same way she loves you.” Jensen shrugged. “Come on man, don't play this game, don't pretend that I don't know what been going on–”

“Enough!” You couldn't have shouted it slider if you tried. “Both of you, my god we’re all supposed to be adults here?” You sighed as you looked at Jake and then over to Jensen. Something was off with him, this wasn't the Jensen you knew. He seemed off, very off. “Can you two just back up, let's start over.” However, it was a plea that fell on deaf ears.

Remember that impending moment of weakness mixed with overall exhaustion Jake mentioned earlier? Yeah– about that. Guess it was coming around the corner sooner rather than later.

“Nah–” Jake shook his head as he let out a sigh. This was bullshit, you really had him fooled. He really did think that there was a possibility here that maybe, just maybe, the two of you could fix what he had unintentionally broken while focusing on your health. “Nah, I'm not gonna put up with this dickhead.” Jake hissed as unclenched his hands from the railing on your bed. “I'm gonna go get a coffee, try not to catch each other's cancer cells while I'm gone.”

“Jake, don't leave!” You begged as you sat up a little straighter in your bed. “Please—“ The panic that followed was something otherworldly as you watched Jake round out of the hospital room that had become your home away from home. “Please!”

Jensen was if anything, enraged. He hadn’t helped the situation but he never would have left your side after making a remark so thickly lacquered with jealousy. He didn't think Jake would react the way he did, so quick to make assumptions. The small gift Jensen still held in his hand was quickly placed on your bedside table.

“I’ll go talk to him—“ Jensen pressed his lips together as he let his hand fall gently to your shoulder. “My fault, I shouldn't have said what I did, I'm sorry.” Jensen didn't pretend to not see how upset you truly were. He understood what it was like to feel the weight of the world crushing your spirit. “He didn't mean what he said Y/n.”

“He did–” You sighed as you wiped away your tears. “He asked me when he came to take the kids to his mum's house if I was seeing anyone–”

Ah, Jensen thought to himself as he stood by your bedside and listened.

“He wants to get back together, fix what's broken, change.” You sighed as you looked over to the open door that Jake hadn't long before walked out of. “He probably thinks you're more than a friend.” In another life, perhaps Jensen could have been more than just a good friend. In another universe somewhere he hoped that maybe you never had this unforgiving disease. But this wasn't another reality, this was right now.

“All the more reason to fight for his girl.” Jensen cooed as he leaned in to kiss the top of your now very smooth head. “I'll go talk to your husband.”

You caught onto the not so subtle subtlety of the way Jensen teased that title. Husband. Jake Seresin was still very much your husband. He was the very definition of a man who was supposed to be at your side through thick and thin. But right now? You were doubting his ability to fully comprehend what was happening to you. Jake’s focus shouldn’t have been on Jensen and who he was to you. But yet you couldn’t not defend him.

“He’s not a bad guy, he’s really not—“ There was an awkward silence that lingered in the room as Jensen chose to take in what you’d said. “This is all just so much for him to take in.”

“You don’t need to explain your relationship to me.” Jensen wanted to say that if Jake was such an alright guy, then you wouldn’t have left. He wanted to remind you of all the conversations the two of you had had over the past few months. All the times you’d cried about the man who didn’t value your time, your energy, your love. “But a woman like you should never have to beg a man to stay.”

“I left him.” You felt the need to remind the man who stood at your bedside with an ora surrounding him you didn’t recognise. “I stopped begging him to love me a long time ago and you know that.”

Jensen could have thrown the fact you just called out after Jake back in your face, that you’d begged your husband not to leave. But he wasn’t that mean. He was just looking out for you. Someone had to. Someone had to make sure this Jake guy had his priorities in check and that you were at the very top of that list where you belonged.

“I know—“ Jensen pressed his lips together into a fine line. “But that guy just walked out the second things got a little more complicated, what’s gonna stop him from throwing in the towel if your health declines more than it already has?” Jensen shrugged his shoulders like he wasn’t being nasty. It was his version of tough love.

“I’m sorry—“ You scoffed as your face contorted into that of a frown mixed with frustration. “Are you, are you testing Jake?”

“Cancer is one of the world's most leading causes of divorce.” Jensen added like it was a statistic you should have known. He knew you knew it. “I just wanted to see how well he handled a little external pressure.”

“You’re—“ Before you could finish your sentence, Jensen was smiling down at you from ear to ear.

“A menace, I know, but I’m a menace that only has your best interest at heart.” Jensen explained as he sat down beside you for only a brief moment. “Your fight isn’t with Jake right now, he shouldn’t be fighting you or anyone else in your life that may come and go.”

“Jensen—“ You knew Jensen hadn’t been well, but he hadn’t explicitly told you how bad it was. There was something in his eyes though, the way he looked at you like he was looking at you for the last time that had you worried. “What’s going on with you?”

“I’m just making sure if you’re letting that man back into your life that he’s gonna stick around when things don’t go the way he wants them to.” Jensen smiled softly as he picked up your hand to bring towards his lips. He left a fleeting kiss upon the palm of your hand and let out a sigh he wasn’t aware he was holding in. “I’ll go track down your sook of a husband, make sure he’s aware that you’re hopelessly devoted or whatever you wanna call it.”

“Please be nice—“ You pleaded gently as Jensen stood from your bedside. “Please.”

“Anything for you Y/n.” Jensen replied, he knew that this would be the last time he ever saw you apart from in his own version of heaven. “Anything for you.”

***~***~***~***~***~***~*

Jake Seresin had never been a fan of hospitals. That mentality first started when he broke his leg in kindergarten and needed a full cast, but it grew with him well into adulthood. Jake had never liked hospitals, even when all three of his children were born he still hated them. Not even the love he had for his children could override the hate he felt towards the sterile environment that gave far too many infections to people to be considered ‘normal’

“Seresin.” But Jake had never hated hospitals more than he did the second he heard his last name being called from just a short distance down the hall. Called by a man who Jake would happily like to never see again. “The hell is your problem?” Jake caught the sight of the man who’d brought you flowers coming right towards him with a fire burning in his eyes. The man you had kept somewhat a secret from Jake. Much like your diagnosis.

“My problem is asking me what my problem is.” Jake groaned as he took a sip of his shitty ass hospital coffee. “Don’t you and my wife have things to talk about?” Jake asked as he took a few steps away from where Jensen had stopped in his tracks. “Things I’m not privy to as it seems? Like her health or new love life?”

“You don’t even know who I am to your wife!” Jensen barked loud enough to have Jake stopping in the middle of the hall. The six foot something aviator turned slowly on his heels to give the almost matching in height bald dude the time of day he seemed to crave. “But I know all about you, because I’ve been there for Y/n while you’ve been busy playing part time parent across the country.” Jensen had nothing to lose, he was just a dying man who had no time left to cherish.

Jake wasn’t about to stand here and take this. He didn’t need some guy who’d stepped into your life to tell him what to do. You were the mother of Jake’s children, you’d always be that to him regardless if he could fix what he broke.

“Get out of my face before you need a plastics consult.” Jake growled through gritted teeth all the while Jensen grinned. He was standing his ground as Jake continued on his defensive. “Because so help me god, you may feel like god right now with your self-righteous heart and knight in shining armour attitude, but you sure as hell won’t feel all high and mighty when you meet him.”

Jensen didn't want to fight with your husband, but he did want to make it known that time was forever fleeting, and if Jake kept going the way he was there would be no time left to fix what he broke. You needed someone to be there for you, Jake had to be that person.

Because Jensen couldn’t be that guy for you anymore, he had no fight left to give you. He had no fight left in himself.

“You know I sympathise with you Jake, I do, it must be hard being the guy who broke your own marriage to a woman who loves so fiercely and so much.” Jensen started as he let his elbows rest atop his sweatpants clad knees. “And now having to deal with the fact that said wife is dying must be a lot to work through.”

Jake remained speechless as his eyes lingered down to the man who was almost out of breath from his walk through the halls. He held his half drunk coffee cup in his hand with enough rage coursing through his veins that Jake was actually surprised he hadn’t crushed the flimsy cardboard vessel.

“But you know what the worst part of all that is? Is that your priority isn’t your wife, or fixing your marriage—“ Jensen continued on. “No, it’s on the guy who your wife chose to confide in when you were nowhere to be found.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” Jake replied with a hiss in his tone that mimicked the deadliest of snakes. “I couldn’t give a shit who you are to her or what you want, because she’s my fucking wife—mine!”

“And yet here you are arguing that point with me in the hall when you could be at her bedside appreciating all the small moments you’ll be lucky to look back on one day.” Jensen grew more heated as Jake took a few strides his way, towering over where Jensen sat. “You threw a fit the second I stepped into that room without using any critical thinking skills you aviators claim to have in the heat of the moment.”

“She told me she wasn’t seeing anyone! Come to find out that that’s—“ Jake didn’t get a chance to finish his sentence before Jensen intervened that train of thought.

“She’s not! You’re wife fucking love’s you!! She kept her prognosis from you because she was so scared you didn’t love her back enough to fucking care! And you’re hung up on the idea she’s seeing someone? Me!?” Jensen scoffed as he stood, the few strides he took towards Jake were made with intent behind every single one. Enough to have Jake stumbling back every so slightly. “Here’s a concept for you man.” Jensen pressed his index finger into Jake’s sternum. “Maybe, just maybe, if I was sleeping with your wife, she’d remember her worth.”

“You really don’t know what you’re talking about.” Jake sighed, there was no way he was entertaining this delusion any more than he already had. “I think you should leave.” The idea of you being with another man sent Jake into a blind rage of jealousy that saw no reason. But at the end of the day, he was the one who walked out on you. He’d strayed too far from your hospital room and couldn’t see your bed socks anymore.

Fuck….

“Maybe, maybe I should—“ Jensen agreed. “And hell I don’t even know you at all, but from what I’ve managed to piece together? it’s that you're a crap husband who doesn’t have the emotional capacity to handle the fact his wife could lose this battle.” Jensen retaliated with a stone cold expression. “But something I do know is that no amount of prayer or candles or begging will reverse time, so put your ego side and focus on the fact your wife needs you now more than ever before and if you leave her side the way you did today ever again, trust me when I say you’ll regret it every day of your life.”

“Y/n isn’t dying—“ Much like Jensen was taking his fear of the unknown out on Jake, Jake was just about ready to let loose on the guy who was picking apart his very character. Sure, Jake recognised he wasn’t the best husband, but he also knew you weren’t dying. Not right now, not while he wasn’t by your side.

“I wasn’t either, but as it turns out we all have an expiry date.” Jensen replied. The atmosphere and energy surrounding the two men who were going head to head suddenly shifted. “Some sooner than others, but we all have one, and when yours is up yours is up and there ain't nothing you can do you extend it.”

“You’re—“ Jake couldn’t bring himself to say it.

“A walking corpse.” Jensen finished the sentence he knew Jake was trying to speak into existence. Although he didn’t care to beat around the bush. “So trust me when I tell you that wishful thinking does shit when your body decides it’s had enough.”

“Does Y/n know?” Jake's first worry was how this news, how this detrimental turn of events, would affect you. His heart forgot how to beat inside his chest when he watched Jensen shake his head in response.

“She needs to focus on her own journey, and before I go I need to make sure she has a support system because for a while there I was all she seemed to have.” Jensen explained. There it was, the truth of the matter.

Jake saw it clear as day, the care, the worry, the intention to make sure you had someone there for you because Jensen wasn’t going to be there anymore. You may not have slept with the guy standing before Jake but if Jake knew anything, it was the look of a man who was unequivocally in love with you. He saw his own reflection of Jensen's eyes.

“Go back, apologies, and you fix your marriage man because that woman? That electrifying woman who sees the good in everything doesn’t deserve to go through this alone—and you turning your back on her the second someone made things a little difficult for you isn’t a good representation of the husband she deserves.”

“You love her, don’t you?” Jake asked as he took a second to truly take in Jensens whole argument. The world seemed to go on around them, with doctors and nurses carrying out their daily duties and rounds. Family members walking to and from rooms visiting loved ones. But for Jake and Jensen? The world stopped when it came to you. “You’re in love with my wife, say it.” Jake couldn’t hide the pain in his voice. “Tell me you love her, then this all makes sense.”

“Maybe—“ Jensen tried to play his love for you down into something that was just a social construct. “Maybe I love her, but I don’t get a chance to explore that, you do though.” Jensen was truly trying to hide the pain in his eyes, but Jake could see it all too easily. Jensen knew that. “So if not for yourself, for her, pull your head out of your ass man—“

“I never stopped loving her though.” Jake sighed out in frustration as he sat down on one of the plastic hospital chairs that lined the hallway. Jensen followed soon after, both men decided that the heat of the argument was settling into something more valuable. “I just—I lost sight of what I had.”

“That’s just not a good enough excuse.” Jensen replied as he let his head fall back against the wall. “Listen, I don’t plan on coming back after I leave today.”

Jake didn’t respond, he simply waited for Jensen to explain. But the explanation never came and Jake never pressed. If anything he was kind of relieved in a selfish way.

“If you truly want to fix what’s broken, if you really want to fight for her and be by her side when she needs you the most, you’ll get up and you’ll go back in there and you’ll be the guy who gets to hold her like no one else does.” Jensen pauses momentarily before he continued on. “Because there’s better guys out there Jake, and she shouldn’t have to settle for one who doesn’t appreciate what’s right under his damn nose.”

“Is this your way of telling me you’re a better man than me?” Jake asked cautiously, a part of him didn’t want the answer to be yes. But Jake needed to know what the man sitting beside him truly thought. You saw something good inside him, inside both of them.

“I’m not a better man than you Jake—“ Jensen sighed as he stood from his chair. It was getting late, he had said his peace, he had put the fear for a dying man inside Jake Seresin. There wasn’t much more Jensen could contribute to your life besides what he had already given.

“I’m just a man who’s run out of time and has nothing left to lose.”

***~***~***~***~***~***~

Tags: @blindedbythelightt @starset21 @tayl0rhuynh @mamachasesmayhem @marvelogic @itsmytimetoodream @maverick-wingman @kodzukenmaaa @eternalsams @seitmai @nota-professional @jessicab1991 @hardballoonlove @senawashere @fanficfandomlove @withahappyrefrain @dizzybee03 @maisie-rebloging-blog

@goldenseresinretriever @a-reader-and-a-writer @sunlightmurdock @shelbycillian @memoriesat30 @accioprocrastination @the-aspiring-fanfic-writer @athenabarnes @eternallyvenus @emma8895eb @kmc1989

#was it over? // jake seresin #tw: cancer #jake hangman seresin #jake hangman seresin x reader #jake seresin x reader #jake seresin fanfiction #jake hangman imagine #jake seresin imagine

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absolutebl · 3 months

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This Week in BL - Alan & Jeff Forever!

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

Jan 2024 Wk 4

Ongoing Series - Thai

The Sign (Sat YT) ep 10 of 12 - I am a little concerned that this is getting too big for its britches, rather like Phaya’s recently recovered snake… shall we say? Adding in yet another character at this juncture isn’t the best idea. Still, I love how this show makes me cackle laugh with grandmas + Yai and then TENSION.

It’s a wobbly kind of balance but a balancing act is happening nonetheless. It makes the pacing of this show good. It may be all over the place but I'm never bored.

Pit Babe (Fri iQIYI) ep 11 of 14 - No trash talk this week, I was charmed & delighted. Who knew I would actually enjoy this show? Certainly not me. (not much of a...) Trash watch happening here.

Cooking Crush (Sun YT) ep 8 of 12 - I am pretty much skipping most of the 3 chef friends, and all of the side dish action (sorry Neo). And with OffGun apart for most of this ep, it didn’t hold together since they are the glue. Sigh.

Last Twilight (Fri YT) ep 12fin - Okay let’s talk about it.

Mhok should have gone off with someone else. Day treated him like shit and never once apologized. To assume an apology isn’t necessary is to pity Day in the exact way he didn’t want. (On a complete aside, one of my favorite Thai restaurants back in my mispent youth was in Hilo, HI… ah memories) meanwhile the "passing escalators trope" activated in the land of malls (it’s been a while my old friend).

Anygay, I hold that Mohk was not a fault and Day was the one who needed to apologize.

Although they did have one of BL's BEST ever face touch moments.

In conclusion:

The story of a blind man and his caregiver falling in love. Mark is great. JimmySea are spectacular. The support cast is GMMTV-good. And for the first 3/4 this BL was something rather special. But it was let down by its ending (for which I entirely blame the author). In order to like this show you must buy into the premise that Mhok was in the wrong and caused their breakup. If you don’t believe that, you won’t like this BL. Also "fixing a disability = true happiness" is gross messaging. For me, endings counts for a lot and this one was ultimately “happy” but felt like a failure. 7/10 and I was sorely tempted to go as low as a 6/10, so it should count itself lucky

I dithered my darling BLabies... I dithered A LOT over this one. But JimmySea alone held this one up.

GMMTV we gotta talk. You're fielding some of the world's best pairs right now. It's time to get them equally good scripts.

For Him (Thurs iQIYI) ep 9 of 12 - This installment had too much of the side couple in it. Although it was nice to see First/Dream (Twins) again. He's still a cutie, even playing a straight.

My Universe (Sun iQIYI) ep 23 of 24 - I have to say I’m very glad we are on the last installment of the series. Narcissistic hairdresser starts seeing a spirit in a mirror. Turns out to be a friend from his youth who he thought was dead. This one is kinda sweet, and I find the premise interesting. Is the kid actually dead and a spirit? Or is there something else going on? I am intrigued. And I like the actor playing the kid in the mirror. I suspect this will be sad tho.

Time the series (Thai Gaga) ep 3 of 10 - I don’t exactly know what is going on. And frankly I don’t particularly care, either. So far nothing seems to be happening, and I really intensely dislike one half of the main couple. DNF welcome 2024 here we go

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Love For Love's Sake (Korea Weds iQIYI) 1-2 of 8 - based on the Manhwa Love Supremacy Zone by Hwacha (they should have kept the original title). I adore the premise. IRL person has been sent into fictional universe to save a side character from doom. Fantastic. Every fanfic author's dream. Also, I love that our POV was the bad boy in high school so there’s also a redemption arc going on. I adore this kind of isekai (if you wanna call it that). Puppy/cat pairing too!

Although I Love You and You AKA Sukiyanen Kedo Do Yaro ka (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 3 of 10 - Oh my goodness they too cute. Basically dating. Although only one of them realizes it, and he is such a drama queen. It’s GREAT. Also they are both so damn gay. I love the supportive bestie trying to cope with the girl who has a crush on his gay bff.

Happy Ending (Korea Tues YT) 1 of 3 - Strongberry is back and it’s very them and very atmospheric and cute. I’m enjoying it.

Sahara-sensei to Toki-kun (Japan Fri Gaga) ep 7 of 8 - Japan giveth and Japan taketh away again. Look, I just like the lost love teacher/teacher couple better. I'm assuming they'll have to do a time jump in the final episode to make this one work at all.

I am SO GLAD we have KBLs back on our screens.

It's done

What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Gaga) 10 eps - will binge when I have any spare time. 2024 is crazy busy for me so far.

The Servant and the Young Master - from Vietnam so I assume it's on YouTube. I never even noticed. Anyone?

Began Beginning (Myanmar YouTube) - Is TRUST Entertainment bringing us the first ever Burmese BL? I don't know if it's really the first, but @heretherebedork vouched for it, so I will give it a watch through.

Beside You (Thai ????) - a 3 ep short that's supposed to have aired but I can't find it.

It's Airing But...

[NO INTERNATIONAL] Cherry Magic (Sat YouTube) ep 3 of 12 - yeah Japan put the smack down on our boys. Sadness. You can use a VPN if you like. Read all about it here.

Ossans Love Season 2 (Japan Gaga) - 5 years later, will anything have changed? This is Japan so… probubly not. I won't be watching this. I disliked Season one and actively hated the follow ups. No thank you.

Playboyy (Thurs Gaga) 14 eps - Dear Playboyy, it's not you, it’s me… I hate you. You’re about as deep (and as palatable) as a shot glass of cum. While I'm sure you’re someone’s kink, you're my weakest link. Goodbye. I DNFed this at ep 5. Frankly I'm impressed with myself for getting that far.

The Whisperer (Sun ????) 10 eps - Ends next week. Thai horror BL that ALSO involves cheating (what joy is mine). I don't think even the perfect single dimple can motivate me to watch. Word is... it's terrible.

7 Days Before Valentine (Weds WeTV) 10 eps - Giving me Luminous Solution vibes. I'm waiting to binge if safe.

Dead Friend Forever (Thai Sat iQIYI) - horror, meh, tell me if it's worth my time?

In Case You Missed it

All my year-end round ups:

TOP 10 BL Trends of 2023

Top 10 BL Secondary Pairs of 2023

2023 BLs Best Trope Execution Awards! TOP 10

All the BLs Announced for 2023 that didn't happen

BL 2023's Best:

Back Hugs Thailand & Elsewhere

Cute Bits of Domesticity

Boys Feeding Boys

BOOP!

Best Cuddles

Heads in Laps

Touching Head Touches

Thailand Put His Head on Your Shoulder

Put Your Head on My Shoulder (not Thailand)

BEST KISSES (not Thailand)

BEST KISSES FROM THAILAND

Next Week Looks Like This:

2/2 City of Stars AKA Fueangnakorn (Fri YouTube?) 10 eps - An actor falls in love with a programmer and the narrative intends to “explore the ramifications of being public figure in the social network era who must endure critics, bullying, and defamation.” Looks like another Lovely Writer/Call It What You Want sort of thing. But helmed by Star Hunter? Chaos will ensue.

2/2 Anti Reset AKA Anti-Reset (Taiwan Fri Gaga?) 10 eps - from Vidol (who aren't doing us very proud right now) - Human and robot find love.

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Say what you like about this show (and I have) they do some very gay cuddling. (Him the series)

I LOVE THEM SO MUCH.

This show, damnit, so close to being genius. (Last Twilight)

I don't that's a hardshi,p grandma ... although it may be a hard ship... get it.

I'll stop now.

(The Sign)

(Last week)

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princessofmarvel · 1 year

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Wonderland

summary | renfield sees a woman that catches his eye and knows that he shouldn’t speak to her, but he finds that he just can’t help himself.

pairing | robert montague renfield x fem!reader

wc | 1.2k

warnings! | none! maybe some cursing and not really proof read but it’s just fluff lol

genre | fluff!

author's note! | I saw renfield on sunday and just knew that I needed to write for him lol, especially since there are only a few fics on here about him, most of them are written by the amazing @youlightmeupfinn so definitely go check those out! this is a part of my “swift series” (where I write fics based on taylor swift songs) so if you have any requests for the swift series (or for just something that you would like for me to write) please send them in! I would be happy to write about them! and as always, I do I have really bad OCD that causes me to write in some random capitalization, and punctuation, but I think that we don't have to worry about that in this fic lol. and let me know if there are any mistakes, but please be kind!

Renfield was taking a stroll down the streets of New Orleans, he tells himself that it is to relax and to clear his head but in reality he was trying to figure out what to bring his master to eat that night. He didn’t want to bring him anyone innocent like he so desperately wanted, that's why he joined the support group in the first place, to bring those people's monsters to him. To bring people that he wouldn’t have to feel so guilty for. But, his boss didn’t like the taste of those people too much.

He spotted a coffee shop that doubled as a bookstore a few paces down and decided to slip in to sit and think about this. That was when he spotted her. Someone he knew his master would actually praise him for bringing back to the lair. She was the most stunning beauty he had ever seen. Sat in the back corner with a latte and what appeared to be a new romance novel that she was on the last few pages of. She was perfect.

Renfield ordered some tea and took a seat not too far from her, but not so close that he would seem weird. He knew he couldn’t bring her to him. No matter how much his master would appreciate it. No matter how much praise he would get for doing such a good job, he just couldn’t do it, it couldn’t, wouldn’t be her.

He wanted to speak to her, he knew he shouldn’t though. He knew that he should never involve someone like her in his life. But, he also knew that if he had the chance to, that he would regret for the rest of his life if he didn’t

The girl then got up and moved towards the bookshelf. He watched her as she spotted something on the very top shelf that she wanted. He watched as she frowned to herself and huffed and she tried to reach for it but couldn’t. He knew he shouldn’t do this, that this one simple and kind gesture would end up leading him down a rabbit hole, but his feet thought for him as he stood up and made his way to the bookshelf and reached up and grabbed the book she wanted and handed it to her.

“Thank you so much! I wish these things weren’t so tall.” She said as she looked up at him. Her voice just added to her appeal, it was soft and you could tell she was kind just from the sound of it.

“I agree, It’s like the person who invented them just wanted a cruel laugh.” He said before he could stop himself.

“Yes! Exactly! Oh I’m (Y/n) by the way.” She said as she put her hand out to him, his body taking over his mind and shaking it.

“Robert Montague Renfield” He said as he shook her soft hand.

“That’s a nice name, sounds fancy.” She said which earned a chuckle from him. “I noticed you’re alone, would you like some company Robert?” She asked. He could tell she was nervous to ask, but seemed like she wasn’t asking out of pity, but out of genuine interest in talking to him. He found himself saying yes and following her back to her table in the corner.

The two spoke for hours, she asked about where he was from, which led to him talking about how hard it is to find good tea in america. He asked about the new book she had picked up, which was ‘Alice in wonderland’, which led to her talking about her love for the 1951 animated movie (He made a mental note to watch it later). They just laughed and talked for hours. Then the conversation led to work. He found himself telling her about having a narcissistic boss that worked him to the bone. And, it never seemed like he really Appreciated it. Then he accidentally let it slip that his boss made him feel like he was undeserving of happiness. He regretted it immediately because he saw how sad it made the girl look.

“Oh Robert, that's just not true. Everyone is deserving of happiness.” She held up her hand to keep him from interrupting and stopping her. “I know it seems like sometimes you don’t, maybe because you’ve done some things that you regret, but as long as you make peace with those things and accept those things, to know that they were the wrong things to do. And, you work to better yourself from them. Then there is no reason why you should not deserve happiness.” She said to him with a smile.

Then he realized that her hand was laying on top of his from across the table. She must have realized that she had done that because she pulled her hand away and seemed slightly embarrassed.

“Thank you, you don’t know how much I needed to hear that.” he said while looking at her. He felt like he needed to change the subject, in fear of making things awkward. “So, what do you do for work?”

“Oh, I uh, work here actually.” she said finally looking back at him after feeling embarrassed. “Oh god i seem pathetic, I swear I have a life and friends, I just like to come here when I have some time to relax.” She said while letting out a small laugh.

“You don’t seem pathetic, I would do the same if my work place was as relaxing as here.” Renfield said while giving her a soft smile.

“I actually go in later, wait what time is it?” She checked her phone and jumped up out of her seat when she saw the time. “Oh my god I was supposed to start an hour ago, and I’m here, Linda why didn’t you say anything?” She said turning around towards the older woman working the register. Who in return gave her a wink and a smile before tending to the customer now in line, the first in hours.

“I’m so sorry Robert, I have to go.” She said as she gathered her things. He knew he shouldn’t, but he needed to see her again.

“Perhaps we could do this again sometime?” he said, folding his jacket over his arms.

“I would love to, you could give me your number and we could plan something.” The girl said with a smile.

“Oh, I don’t have a phone.” He said, which he immediately regretted since he knew in this day and age was weird. “I broke it yesterday, I was going to replace it tomorrow.” He said quickly thinking of something. “But, I can pick you up here this weekend, if you would be interested.”

“That sounds great, what time?”

“I was thinking maybe around 1:00? I hear the weather will be nice on Saturday, so I thought maybe we could have a picnic.” He said, knowing that doing something during the day would mean that his boss could not interrupt it,

“That sounds wonderful, It’s a date.” She said while making her way to the registrar. “I’ll see you then Robert.”

He smiled and said goodbye as he made his way out the door and onto the street, the sun starting to go down. He had realized what exactly he had done. He knew that he couldn’t let his boss find out about her, and he also knew how hard that would be to do. But, knowing that he would get to be with her, made how hard this would be worth it.

“Oh fuck me.” he said making his way back to his boss, but with a smile on his face, something that hadn’t truly been there in a long time.

#renfield #renfield imagine #renfield fanfic #renfield x reader #renfield fluff #robert montague renfield #r.m. renfield #renfield fic #renfield movie #nicholas hoult #nicholas cage #ben shwartz #awkwafina

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olderthannetfic · 2 months

Note

I have a question. There's a book series I really want to read, actually have been excited to read it for months. Today I found out the author is a horrible person, like, really horrible. Is it still ok if I read their books?

One of my friends(A) said it should be ok and they think you can read someones book but still hate the author. My other friend(B) suggested I pirate the book, so the author doesn't get money??

I kinda agree with A, but I see so many people who think if you read a book written by someone who wasn't a good person, makes you a bad person and they are very loud about this. So I wanted to know your opinion.

LOL. Hang out with actual adults, not people who think you get villain cooties from this.

If someone is awful in the wrong way, it may make the book less enjoyable. That's reasonable.

If someone uses their money for horrible things, one may wish to deprive them of more of it.

I personally also think it makes sense to use my limited free time on things I wholeheartedly support.

But it really depends on how much free time you have and what kind of "horrible person" the author is. Are they shitty in relationships? That's sad, but unless it shows in the work, I don't care. Do they donate fucktons of money to anti-queer political causes? FFS, don't give them any of your hard-earned cash. Are they an asshat to fellow writers or their fans? Don't talk about the book and give them publicity and legitimacy.

Hating the author or not hating the author doesn't do shit.

Evaluate what harm the author causes and whether you think that you reading their work will further that harm.

Is it enough to not give them money? Is it better to not give them brain space either?

It depends!

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hypexion · 2 years

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There was no Chloé Bourgeois Redemption Arc

It’s time to for me to write about the so-called “Redemption Arc“ for Chloé Bourgeois, of Miraculous Ladybug infamy. Many people claim that such a thing existed. These people are wrong. While Miraculous Ladybug may provide the illusion of such an arc, that’s all it is - an illusion. And like all illusions, it falls apart once you touch it.

There’s also some questionable takes in regards to exactly how responsible Marinette is meant to be for Chloé’s “redemption”, which need to be tackled since they help feed into the illusion. And also because I find them deeply offensive. To me, personally.

A neccesary preface here is that I’m not saying Chloé is incapable of redemption. What I am saying, however, is that during seasons two and three of Miraculous Ladybug, the redemption arc people claim existed clearly did not.

Redemption 101

In the most basic sense, a redemption arc is a type of character arc where a bad character decides to stop being bad and start being good. Along the way, it’s generally accepted that they need to atone for their bad actions, and perhaps do something to reverse the damage such actions have caused. A critical component required for this to work is that the character both understands that their actions are harmful, and so decides to act in a better way.

Probably the most famous redemption arc in western animation is Zuko’s, from Avatar: The Last Airbender. Zuko begins the show as an antagonist, directly attempting to capture Aang, the Avatar and Last Airbender. Doing so will allow the Fire Nation to win the war, and also complete their genocide of the Air Nomad people. However, Zuko realises that supporting the Fire Nation’s bid for world domination is harmful to others, and himself. By the end of the series, he has rejected the worldview of his father, grandfather and great grandfather, and indeed helps Aang defeat the Firelord. Along the way, Zuko find a way to help not just Aang, but also Katara and Sokka, who are also victims of Fire Nation Imperialism. Zuko earns redemption not through the decision to be good, but by performing good, and in many cases, reparative actions.

Honestly, from this basic definition, I think it’s pretty obvious that Chloé hadn’t even started the first step of a redemption arc by the time she betrays Ladybug in Miracle Queen. She never accepts her actions are wrong, makes no attempt to change them without an ulterior motive, and generally continues to do bad things for bad reasons. But in spite of this, the claims of this mythical redemption arc don’t just exist, they are considered generally accepted. Why? It’s complicated, yet simple.

Chloé Who?

On a basic level, Chloé Bourgeois is fairly generic character - the “mean girl“ school bully, who torments the protagonist, Marinette Dupain-Cheng. In keeping with Miraculous’ superhero genre, Chloé admires Ladybug, Marinette’s superhero alter-ego. How ironic! Generally, Chloé acts as a minor, civilian-level antagonist to Marinette, who gets in the way, while being clearly much less of a deal than Hawk Moth. However, due to the mechanics of akumatization, Chloé’s actions often spiral into larger, supervillain-shaped consequences. Because while she may fit into the bully archetype, there is one thing that makes her somewhat atypical: a reach that extends far beyond the school setting.

André Bourgeois is his daughter’s primary enabler. As a rich person and Mayor of Paris, he has a significant amount of influence. Influence he makes freely available to Chloé for basically any purpose. No grudge is too petty, no problem too small when it comes to indulging her whims, and no bridge is too big burn. Nobody who theoretically has the authority to say no to Chloé actually can, because her father is implicitly approving her every action. It’s hardly a shock that Chloé is consistently terrible when she faces no consequences for her actions.

But there’s one last piece in the Chloé puzzle - Audrey Bourgeois. Chloé really wants her mother’s approval, but her mother lives in another country. Audrey is also a terrible person, a character who is literally defined by her vileness. She has Chloé’s attitude, and André’s level of influence, and like her daughter, immediately throws a tantrum when she can’t get her way. The attention Audrey gives towards her daughters is primarily negative, and that’s when she actually pays attention to them. Thus, Audrey provides Chloé with a Tragic Backstory, and some much needed Sympathy Points. This, of course, forms the foundation of the Redemption Illusion.

The thing about Chloé’s relationship (or lack thereof) with her mother is while it explains her behavior, it doesn’t excuse it. The harm she inflicts is no less because of it, and many of her actions cannot be ignored due to it. I think there’s a pretty obviously piece of bad logic here. Many characters who undergo redemption arcs are often sympathetic villains. Chloé is a sympathetic villain. But that doesn’t mean that Despair Bear, the episode that introduces this sympathetic side is the start of, nor the foundation of a redemption arc. If anything, Despair Bear shows the primary reason why Chloé isn’t on the path to redemption - her attempts to be “nice“ are motivated entirely to maintain her friendship with Adrien, and once she has what she wants, she immediately reverts to her normal behaviour. This theme of apparently good acts being done for selfish reasons will be repeated later.

Marinette: Victim, Not Victimizer

An important part of the Redemption Illusion is how it ultimately revolves around not just Chloé, but Marinette. Chloé is nothing but negative towards Marinette, but at the same time admires Ladybug... who is Marinette. This isn’t Alya style “wow look how cool and heroic she is“ style admiration, however. No, Chloé, in a sense, wants to be Ladybug. First by pretending to be her, and later via the Bee Miraculous, which would seem to put her on the same level as Ladybug. But since Ladybug is Marinette, this can only lead to conflict.

While Chloé has perpetrated many on-screen acts that are selfish, obnoxious and downright cruel, something that manages to slip under the radar is her pre-Origins treatment of Marinette. Sabine’s comment about how long Marinette and Chloé have been in the same class indicates that the latter has been bullying the former for at least three years. This has evidently damaged Marinette’s self-confidence, since even after being Ladybug in part one of Origins, she still thinks she can’t do it, and tries to give it up. She also doesn’t dispute Alya’s rather hasty assessment of Chloé as evil, and immediately assumes that Adrian is a bad person because he’s friends with Chloé.

Marinette’s relationship with Chloé is already poisoned at the start of the show. And it’s entirely Chloé’s fault. She didn’t have to bully Marinette. Being cruel to Marinette wouldn’t earn Chloé her mother’s approval. All it achieves is making Chloé feel better, by making Marinette suffer. Three years of bullying isn’t something you can ignore. It’s not something Marinette can simply “get over”, even as Ladybug. She probably hates Chloé, and every drop of enmity is earned. But how can I know this all from the limited picture painted by Origins, and the glimpses into Marinette’s pre-Ladybug life? I don’t. This isn’t something I needed to find from the text or subtext of the show. So then, how do I know?

I know because I lived it. When I was Marinette’s age, I was bullied. A lot. It hurt. But what people don’t want to acknowledge is that being a victim of bullying doesn’t just make you sad. It’s deeper than that. It made me angry. At the perpetrators, and the staff who let it happen, no matter how many times it was brought to their attention. It’s took me years to realise just how much it affected me, how my aggressive behaviour in certain online spaces might be connected to it. In Marinette, I see a part of myself. So when I see people claim that Marinette is somehow to blame for Chloé’s actions, that “Marinette should have given Chloé a chance“, it makes me a little angry. If someone told me I should be responsible for making my bullies better people, I’d tell them to fuck off.

Attempting to shift the responsibility for repairing Chloé’s bad behaviour on to Marinette is simply victim blaming with extra steps. Yes, Marinette is Ladybug, hero of Paris. But Marinette is also Marinette, a long-term victim of Chloé, and someone who Chloé continues to try to abuse, even if the efficacy is no longer there. It’s also not really fair to Chloé, either, when you think about it. Marinette is positioned to think the worst of Chloé, meaning she’s likely to see any regression on Chloé’s part as proof that the whole endevour is pointless. For Chloé to escape her toxic behaviour, she needs help from someone she hasn’t caused significant damage to.

And as with the rest of the Redemption Illusion, you have to ignore a lot of the text to make the idea that Marinette is somehow to blame seem reasonable. Marinette shows more compassion to Chloé than Chloé does to anyone in her entirety. It simply doesn’t help, because Chloé doesn’t want Ladybug to be nice to her, she wants Ladybug to accept her as an equal. And when that isn’t given, Chloé isn’t above trying to take it, with disasterous results.

Bad Bee-haviour

A key point in Zuko’s redemption arc is when he joins Team Avatar. This is when he truly abandons the ideals of Fire Nation Imperialism, and chooses to work directly against them. It’s not the end, but a midpoint. And it’s not a reward - it’s a duty, a commitment to help Aang defeat Ozai. I think it’s worth noting that Zuko actually gets weaker due to this, as he can no longer draw on his negative emotions to firebend. Only by helping Aang discover the pre-imperialism version of Firebending does he regain the ability himself. Rejecting the negative brings Zuko so far, but to be complete he must embrace a positive alternative.

Chloé’s transformation into Queen Bee is her anti-Zuko moment. She doesn’t work to attain it - the Bee Miraculous is literally dropped into her path. It gives her power, yes, which she immediately abuses. Queen Bee doesn’t exist to do good, like the other four heroes at the time. No, Queen Bee exists to exalt Chloé. Becoming a hero doesn’t move her to toward redemption. If anything, it moves her away from it.

It all comes back to Chloé’s first act as Queen Bee. In an attempt to prove that she’s “exceptional“, she transforms and tries to find a problem to solve. But when she can’t find one, she chooses to create one. By paralysing a train conductor, which ends up creating a problem she can’t solve. If it weren’t for Ladybug and Chat Noir’s timely intervention, a lot of people would have been injured, or even killed. All because Chloé wanted to seem like a “hero”. It’s an act so callous that it should have marked the end of her career as Queen Bee. It’s instant, irrevocable proof that she can’t be trusted with a Miraculous, because she nearly murdered a bunch of people with it.

But even if you ignore the train incident, being Queen Bee clearly doesn’t make Chloé better. In both Stormy Weather 2 and Miracular, her cruelty is what triggers an akumatization. In Animaestro, she forms a truce with Marinette entirely for the purpose of harassing Kagami. These are not the actions of someone trying to be a better person. Indeed, they look very much like the actions of a person who doesn’t think they need to change, and is thus continuing as usual.

Yet in spite of the lack of actual progress, Queen Bee is perhaps the keystone of the Redemption Illusion. She wants to be a hero. So it is assumed that if she wants to be a hero, she must be good. I suppose this line of argument sounds convincing, if you only consider it on the surface level. The problem is that it falls apart when you actually examine Chloé’s actual behaviour after becoming Queen Bee. Which is mostly the same as her behaviour before, except sometimes she tries leveraging being Queen Bee for status or bullying. This is because her motivation for being a hero isn’t heroic - it’s selfish.

Malicious Queen

Of course, the Redemption Illusion eventually collided with reality in the form of Miracle Queen. When Hawk Moth offers her the Bee Miraculous, Chloé doesn’t hesitate to take it, and is then willingly akumatized. While I do think this could have had a little more setup, it’s an action that’s entirely in-character for Chloé. She’s selfish, she’s cruel, and she’s unwilling to change. But Ladybug couldn’t be bullied or blackmailed via Chloé’s normal methods. So when Hawk Moth offers her a way around Ladybug’s No, of course she takes it. She accepts akumatization because she believes that the best way to prove her superiority to Ladybug is by harming her. The same way she harmed many other characters up to this point. (Including Marinette, who is Ladybug.)

Some people attempt, in the usual poor manner, to deflect Chloé’s responsibility for her actions onto Ladybug. Gotta keep that victim blame train going, I guess. The logic is that because Ladybug chose Kagami to help fight Heart Hunter for selfish reasons, Chloé is magically absolved of her guilt. I can’t disagree that picking Kagami in order to break up her date with Adrien was a bad thing, but in the grand scheme of things, it’s not that bad. The fact of the matter is that Ladybug probably wasn’t going to bring back Queen Bee, no matter the situation. It’s not her job to make Chloé a better person, and it’s not her responsibility to stop Chloé from making bad decisions.

Marinette made a dodgy decision because of a teenage crush and suffered massively disproportionate consequences. Chloé decided to help a terrorist because she felt entitled to the Bee Miraculous, and could still go back to her incredibly privileged life afterwards. It’s Marinette who had to live with the consequences of both their actions, becoming Guardian far earlier than she should have. A consequence that only occured because Chloé decided to help Hawk Moth. Once again, Marinette is not the problem; Chloé is the problem.

Ultimately, Miracle Queen is entirely in-character for Chloé, because Chloé has never been a good person. The Redemption Illusion persists, however, because people seem to have blended her few sympathetic traits with her occational (and temporary) good actions to create a version of Chloé who doesn’t exist within the show. Along with one last act, that really isn’t as heroic as it might seem on the surface.

The One Where She Isn’t Akumatized

In Miracular, Hawk Moth tries to akumatize Chloé and fails. Up to that point, akumatization had been presented as 100% effective, with no attempts to resist being successful. This is occationally used to suggest that Chloé is becoming good, which ignores basically all information the show provides about akumatization.

Throughout Miraculous Ladybug, succumbing to akumatization is never considered to be an immoral act. Indeed, the reasons for akumatization vary, from completely unjustified selfish reasons, to justified selfish reasons and more community-minded reasons. But no matter what a victim’s starting intentions are, Hawk Moth twists them around until he can make them into a supervillain. People are even akumatized over stuff like “kids don’t respect panthers“ and “ice cream was wrong“, which aren’t really things you can appy a moral judgement to.

Since being akumatized is not a moral failure, it follows that resisting is not a moral success. While breaking the akumatization is impressive, with very few people achieving it, that doesn’t mean Chloé gets merit points for it. Indeed, Chloé resists akumatization on the basis that she believes she can still be Queen Bee. She rejects Hawk Moth’s offer not because it’s the right thing to do, but because she thinks she doesn’t need it. Which is why once it becomes clear that Ladybug won’t be giving her the Bee Miraculous, she willing accepts akumatization.

But the real killer problem is that Sabrina is able to be akumatized into Miracular because of Chloé’s actions. When Lila’s fake Ladybug dance fails, Chloé takes it out on Sabrina, in a way that’s just, look, here’s the exact quote:

PLAY? With you!? Who are YOU anyway? You don't have any powers! You're a nobody! I'm a superheroine, okay? I'm Queen Bee! You and I have NOTHING in common! Go away!

That’s a horrible thing to say to someone, especially a friend! She explicitly ties Sabrina’s worth (or lack thereof) to having powers. And the real kicker? This is the last thing she does before the failed akumatization. Out of context, Chloé resisting akumatization might seem heroic. With this context? It’s anything but.

The Overdue Conclusion

Ultimately, a Redemption Arc is a narrative process for developing a character. It’s a trope, a storytelling pattern. The key element of such an arc is change. A static character cannot undergo a redemption arc (or indeed any arc), because the arc is the process of transformation, of becoming a better person. Not just on the surface, but in a fundamental way. A post redemption character is, in some ways, a different person to who they were before.

During seasons two and three of Miraculous Ladybug, Chloé does not change in such a way. She’s just as cruel and spiteful after becoming Queen Bee as she is before. She does bad things for bad reasons. Her motivation for being Queen Bee is entirely selfish. Indeed, while there is some feeling of a divide between Marinette and Ladybug, Queen Bee is simply Chloé with superpowers. And while she may be a victim of abuse from Audrey, that doesn’t mean she is excused from abusing others herself.

Chloé’s tragic flaw is her desire to be exceptional, in a way that places her above other people. This is why she fails to change. In the narrative of Miraculous Ladybug, the exceptional that matters is to be exceptionally kind, exceptionally couragous, exceptionally selfless. Character traits which Chloé displays sparingly and insufficently, because she believes she is above them. But without humility, there can be no change. Without change, there can no redemption. And while others might provide a catalyst for such a change, ultimately it must come from within.

The concluding point is that I still don’t think there was a Chloé Bourgeois Redemption Arc, but I can sort of see how you’d fall into thinking one existed. But when you actually examine the character’s behaviour, the illusion quickly crumbles. At this point, the whole thing has clearly taken on a life of its own beyond the source material, and is perhaps unstoppable. Will my long, somewhat rambly Tumblr post make much of a difference? Perhaps not.

But there are harmful ideas attached to it. As long as people try to make Marinette responsible for Chloé’s actions, it adds, however slightly, to the notion that the abused are responsible for the actions of their abusers. In many respects, I don’t care that strongly about these particular fictional characters. Yet other people do, and in doing so I see how they distort the role of victim and victimizer, and I care about that. I understand that it’s not a big serious issue, but it matters to me. So I’ll say my piece, and move on to other thoughts.

#miraculous ladybug #ml meta #ml fandom salt

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hiemaldesirae · 15 days

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i have less than 24 hours left before i have to go through one of the most stressful days of my life so. heres a list of my fav radiostatic fic recs in no particular order

clarification: by radiostatic i mean fics where vox is 100% not the dom in the relationship. most of these dont contain explicit sex though, and im not recommending any straight porn fics here because you can easily find those with a click and search through the bottom vox tag lmao

most of these fics are unfinished, so be warned that i will not take accountability if you get attached to these without them being finished properly. in fact ill just laugh at you because then we'll be suffering together

now, that aside- starting off strong with some of the more popular fics:

RHTVS / Radio Healed the Video Star by Aspiring_Forest_Witch

notes: LONG fucking fic. like this guys almost 700k words long fic. one of the best things ive ever read in my life though and it has a plotline thats frankly more engaging than the actual showing of hazbin on amazon. so. you know. if you have the time to read it Please do you wont regret it

Unraveling Emotions by Xaelei

notes: one of my favourite fics ever on god. started my brainrot for dad!husk, portrays one of the most scrumptious radiostatic dynamics and is generally so very well written that i might end up trying to recreate one of the scenes in comic form. genuinely in love with this fic and im so glad i can say i was the first comment on this fic because my God its such a treat to see new chapters drop for this. unfortunately i havent had the time to write out a detailed comment as of now but if someone wants to let the author know that im still in love with their fic and will continue supporting it until i drop dead go ahead for me

Safe with Me by rillyrillo

notes: the prequel and main fic of this series is human radiostatic, though the sequel is set in hell. it comes with gorgeous gorgeous art and frankly one of the most exhilirating endings ive ever had the pleasure of witnessing play out. i recommend you guys check out their other fics too, the art continues in them + their radiostatic is written wonderfully across all universes!

A Month of Rut by Vylad

notes: this fic is very self indulgent to me. i love the way radiostatic is written in this one because theyre very soft and sweet, but others may not prefer it if theyre looking for freak4freak radiostatic. if you just want something to indulge in and relax with at the end of a heavy day though this is my #1 rec. i read this sometimes when i find myself crying at night lmao

Down, Up, and Back Down by CowboyEnthusiast

notes: made me sob like a baby. 10/10 no notes whatsoever read it for yourself because you WILL not regret it. i genuinely am always at a loss for words whenever i reread this because it is among the most gutwrenching but beautiful and poetic works that ive ever read and i think it deserves some recognition

Mind the Gap by ZLynn

notes: again, to reiterate, i do very much dislike the abusive!staticmoth portrayal i see in a lot of fics. but in this one... it's written so perfectly, i can definitely see it actually happening. i enjoy the way that val does still seem to care about vox, albeit in his own twisted way that eventually breaks and fractures their love and trust, and its just. Ugh. So fucking good

+ with the less popular but still wonderful depictions of radiostatic that i love to indulge in:

i'll give you a show (cause it helps fill the seats) by dead_and_dreaming

notes: absolutely shameless plug from me for my dear mk's work because i cant stop thinking about the way that she's portrayed al here. its actually insane how fucked up that stupid little deer is and i just. i really fucking love the way that their alastor is written, it's genuinely probably my Number One depiction of alastor ever. i demand more of this stupid little freak RIGHT NOW!!!!

Any of the fics by Rachello344 in the Hazbin Hotel Fandom Tag on their profile

notes: so remember when i told you guys i wouldnt be linking straight porn. looks away... okay in my defense though i read the smut for the characterization and their unique dynamics. its sooo interesting to see how their radiostatic is explored here and im honestly refreshed by the depiction of their relationship. im here for it !!!

The Read 'Em and Weep Series by TooManyPseudonyms

notes: so from what i was able to piece together (everything flies over my head when im reading, forgive me for my low media literacy) this is an au set before the hotel where (in the first work) al and vox are in a qpr relationship. in the second work this evolves into a romantic relationship, and the exploration of their dynamic through this is just... Yeah. please read it its 100% worth your time and so underrated it hurts my heart

Uneasy by Saezs

notes: this fic is one of the first radiostatic fics i read (the others being RHTVS and... i think i tried the 666 series, but it didnt appeal to me lol) and its actually just wonderful. i really love saezs's genderfluid vox and how supportive the other vees are of them <3 their portrayl of the characters puts a smile on my face whenever i reread their work

Heat Waves by HappyPRAWN

notes: i'll be fr dsmptsd hit me like a truck when i read the title but it is such an interesting debut! only at one chapter as of me making this post but the way the author wrote this is so engaging and it really makes me wonder what they have next in store for the fic

Do I have your attention now? by Chi_Chi25

notes: wow no way we have the same name... anyway ahem. ill be completely honest this ones a bit of a guilty pleasure for me. this fic is a bit fragmented and short, so for people who click off fics when they see imperfect grammar this one may not be for you. however if you can look past that, it has an engaging storyline and quite the juicy concept :)

Killer Ex by FanGirl48

notes: gorgeous, gorgeous little human! radiostatic oneshot. i love the relationship that vox and al have here... the reasons why they both stayed away from each other even though theyre still so very clearly down bad for each other... anyway. i think about this one a lot and i still go back to reread it sometimes lol

Negotiations by FanGirl48

notes: i didnt realize until i started making this list that this fic was also written by fangirl48.... go off queen keep feeding us (me). this one was a fic recommended to me initially by link nonny, and i can 100% vouch for how good it is. its got appletv interactions, radiostatic plus lucifer trying to navigate heaven, angels... basically everything needed for a very varied and well packed with flavour story

The diary of a Serial Killer by ShippersCave

notes: okay im running out of brain juice at this point but. yeah this fic is soooo self indulgent to me. this ones another human au, with al as a serial killer and vox as the journalist trying to conduct interviews with him. its got SUCH a good dynamic between al and vox, i encourage you guys to check it out and give it a chance even if youre not really into human aus.

My heart's been pierced by Cupid by ShippersCave

notes: pirate/siren au !!!!!!!!! RAAHH !!!!! i dont have to say anything else for this if thats not enough to get you to click then i dont know what is

System Shutdown by Swoolie

notes: i cant believe i nearly forgot about this one LMAO... vox goes onto a temporary hiatus and everyone goes crazy about it. im not really sure if this counts as radiostatic frankly because of the way its tagged but its so good i think you should give it a read anyway

Together in Radio Static by Anonymous

notes: QPR media husbands radiostatic au !!!! i love this one especially because it opens off with vox slapping alastor across the face for leaving him LMAOO (deserved)

What Has Been by Tianren

notes: another human au (YEAH YEAH I KNOW. JUST HEAR ME OUT OKAY i swear im cooking) look, as someone with religious trauma deeper than i can properly express and the worlds fifteenth worst parental issues, the depiction of vox in this fic just really hits home. i really adore the exploration of voxs past and how the themes of religious guilt and cults are woven in so far- and it blends very seamlessly with their human au, despite the characters eccentricities

you're too sweet for me by awestruck_atrophy and moonbeanies

notes: basically, vox and al make a deal where vox tries to help him out of the shackles or whatever that are bound to him because of his stupid dumbass lusting for power. its very intriguing so far and i love the setup and worldbuilding the authors have done, so you should check it out if you want a unique perspective on radiostatics relationship

candlelight by curtailed

notes: the best way i can think of to describe this one is like... fake marriage but instead of fake marriage its. fake roommates??? the author probably puts it better than me tbh. its super interesting so far, i cant wait to see where this one is headed especially with how unique its premise is!

Zero Day by Anonymous

notes: this one is like those time regression manhwas. you know, the ones where the protag goes back in time and proceeds to try and avoid everyone who made their life miserable- only to fail because for some reason now they're paying attention to them more than they would have had they stayed the same person. its certainly very promising, though! i do love indulging in time regression stories, especially when the mc is someone i love like vox. i really cant wait to see which direction this one is headed in :)

Never as Good as the First Time by IComeForFanficsNowin403

notes: okay. so, uh. um. so- this one is in spanish. HOWEVER its premise (serial killer alastor meets television star (?? i think. its not quite clear) at a party hosted by rosie, moves into his neighborhood to keep an eye on the pretty prey) is just so unique i honestly think its worth the experience to pull out google translate and try living the machine translated life. really. give it a chance. also its got beautiful art to go along with, so.. you know. thats just a bonus!

+ honorary staticmoth and one-sided/past radiostatic fic rec:

Freak-A-Zoid by Femalefonzie

notes: this fic deserves every single piece of praise its ever gotten because good lord. its SO good. i was not seeing the radiostatic twist come in, but it *is* mostly staticmoth. and also a/b/o but i mean. who *hasnt* indulged in a little bit of a/b/o before honestly

there are other fics that i personally like to indulge in, but i frankly wouldnt recommend to anyone else because they're either the kinds of fics that i myself can only bring myself to read after ive spent 8 hours at work crying into my pillow and need to look at something entertaining, or when im starved of content and cant be bothered to cook myself so i pull out the translator and start going at it. (technically i should know how to read french by now but. urgh. anywway..)

#ran rambles #radiostatic fic #radiostatic #fic rec #fanfic recommendation #hazbin hotel #honestly ive probably forgotten a few bangers but my brain is melted by now #if anyone wants to add their own recs feel free. these are just my personal likes #ive read stuff by arctic and addicted ofc but those ones are basically known by everyone afaik lmao. swm is known everywhere too #but thats a bit diff because it is part of an expanding series. so #anyway i didnt like some of the more popular fics like 666 or addicted but i know many people like those #and for good reason too because theyre wonderful! just not to my personal tastes and thats fine

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shegeekery · 2 months

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Reparenting Loki

I want to talk about a dynamic in the Loki/Mobius relationship (in the Loki TV-series) that I've seen touched on but not really discussed in depth.

Note to Lokius-lovers: nothing I say here in any way precludes a healthy romantic relationship. They're both consenting adults, after all, and this wasn't a formal therapist-client relationship.

There's a technique in therapy called "reparenting". The idea is that trauma and behaviors caused by bad parenting can be addressed to some extent if the therapist assumes the role of a "good parent".

I think we can all agree that the "All-Father" was crap as an actual father. Odin knew that Loki took after him even more than Thor did, but many of those shared traits were things that he tried to hide from everyone, while Thor better represented the image he wanted to project. The result was a cruel favoritism, which was picked up by Thor and the rest of the Asgardians. Frigga's love and support wasn't enough to counteract that cruelty, particularly in a strongly patriarchal society like Asgard.

Side note (because I'm that kind of geek): there were so many similarities between Odin and Loki (Odin's friend and blood-brother rather than his son) in the old Norse myths that some scholars have suggested that Loki was at one point simply an aspect of Odin. There's also evidence that the stories as they came down to us were manipulated by the Christians who committed them to writing to shoehorn Loki into something more like the Christian Devil.

Anyway, getting back to our guys... Within the context of the TVA, Mobius represented an authority figure to Loki, who had a long history of rebelling against (or betraying) authority for obvious reasons.

I think the first turning point in the relationship for Loki was:

Loki: I am smart!

Mobius: I know. Loki is rarely left speechless, but his only response to Mobius's simple affirmation was a very un-Loki-like "Okay..." He didn't know how to respond because he wasn't used to that kind of thing, particularly from someone who had power over him. It happened again with:

Loki: A villain.

Mobius: That's not how I see it.

The dynamic between these two people throughout Season 1 was like that. Mobius's genuine love (whether you read it as romantic, platonic, fatherly, brotherly, or a mix of any or all of these) for and non-judgmental acceptance of Loki was apparent from the start, but of course Loki's experiences during his very long lifetime made it nearly impossible for him to trust that until Mobius's actions convinced him that it was real. Learning to trust Mobius also allowed Loki to see himself in a new light.

For his part, Mobius consistently modeled what a good father would have been: loving and accepting, yes, but still able to apply "tough love" when that was warranted. Mobius didn't put Loki into the bad-memory loop to punish him because he was angry (though he was angry, or at least a bit hurt and disappointed). He was just trying to force Loki to acknowledge a truth about himself so that they could move forward — and it worked!

Mobius's instincts and experience as an actual father to two boys, one reasonably well-behaved and the other a mischievous troublemaker, served him well in this, even if he didn't consciously remember his life on the timeline.

Mobius all but confirmed this when he said:

Mobius: I see a scared little boy, shivering in the cold...

It's also significant that when Loki brought this up later, he called it "patronizing", which we usually use to mean "condescending", but can also mean "supporting" and has its root in the Latin word "pater" (father).

I see the hug in episode 1-5 as a sign that the reparenting had taken hold, and that Loki, while not completely healed (it would take a lot more than that!), was at least in a place where he could trust someone, accept love/friendship, and think beyond his own wants and needs.

By Season 2, the relationship between the two men was evolving into one of equals, but even then Loki still occasionally looked to Mobius for guidance. Mobius's approval had become important to him. When Loki witnessed the firm but compassionate way in which Don dealt with two boys who were so like himself and Thor (despite being a stressed-out single dad rather than a god-king with tremendous resources at his disposal), he had to have seen that this was at the core of who Mobius was. Moreover, Loki — and any viewers who had similarly survived a traumatic childhood full of emotional abuse and neglect — probably guessed that Don himself was a survivor who was determined to see to it that his boys would never have to deal with that. If that was the case, then Mobius didn't just see his own son in Loki. He saw himself and couldn't help but empathize.

Don wasn't perfect. His frustration with his younger son was very evident, but Loki, observing, could see the love that lay under it. He may even have thought of times when Odin was driven to anger by Loki's actions and realized that the anger didn't necessarily mean that Odin didn't really love him. Learning to forgive what can be forgiven is another aspect of recovering from childhood trauma.

It's worth remembering that Mobius knew Loki in much the same way we do. We got to see the things that Loki never let anybody see: the fear, the vulnerability, the pain, the longing, and the sadness. (Doesn't hurt that TH can turn a simple reaction shot into a freakin' soliloquy!) The difference is that, while we only get to see the highlights (and lowlights) of Loki's life, Mobius had access to all of it and he had centuries to study it.

Mobius literally knew Loki better than anyone else in (or out) of the multiverse. How could he not love him? And for Loki, knowing that somebody who knew him that well genuinely cared so much for him (same with Sylvie, who understood him in ways that only another Loki could and vice-versa) had to have shaken him to his core and made him rethink a lot of things. The fact that it was Mobius to whom Loki turned in episode 2.6 when he thought he might have to kill Sylvie shows how much he still looked up to Mobius in many ways.

This was a show about redemption, yes, but also about healing from childhood trauma. They did an amazing job with it.

#loki #loki laufeyson #loki series #loki mcu #reparenting #lokius #mobius #childhood trauma

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jeonghaniehaee · 3 months

Text

svt reblogs

master post

reblogs consist of various fics i’ve found that i personally enjoy and hope you do too 🦢

read at ur own risk! some works are 18+ and not meant for younger audiences

there will be some bias towards other members mainly cause i personally read theirs more

order will go: name/link + author, synopsis, and my notes

please support the writers by reblogging their works! everyone in general would appreciate 🕯️

seungcheol:

dad of the year @/wondernus

seungcheol accidentally reveals he has a daughter on a first date and doesn't know how to tell you that his daughter is a dog

notes: i loved this one so much it was just so 💕💞💘💗💓💖

your cherry flavored kisses @/hannyoontify

as his mom always said, kisses are the best kind of medicine for boo-boos

notes: omg sosososo cute 🥹 i loved this one oh so much you can’t believe it

hello tutorial @/97-liners

it’s your final year of college, and you’ve been elected president of your sorority. this is all great and fine, but as the semester goes on, you find yourself having repeated run-ins with the president of the fraternity next door in a series of unfortunate coincidences (that might not actually be coincidences, as you come to discover).

in which you’re trying to deal with your crush on seungcheol in a normal way, but the meddling kids are making it harder than it needs to be.

notes: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THIS IS LIKE ALMOST ONE OF MY FAVORITE FICS OF ALL TIME I LOVE IT OH SO MUCH!! please read this it’s actually perfect ive reread it so much just cause of how much i love it. THIS FIC IS THE EPITOME OF MY LIFE. THIS WRITER DESERVES AN OSCAR AND EVERY SINGLE AWARD IN THE WORLD

boyfriend texts @/lololololchips

notes:so cute and sweet ☹️🫶

fifteen to forever @/gyuswhore

Fifteen was the age you had met Choi Seungcheol at a school hockey game. Forever was the age you would find yourself spending with him.

notes:THIS FIC IS ACTUALLY SOO SWEET I LOVED IT SO MUCH. must read fr💯💯

jeonghan:

nothing new @/luvhhannie

no one would’ve thought that unspoken feelings would’ve been the best for you and jeonghan

notes: hanahaki is such a painfully good au and this fic just perfectly captures it!! i would recommend it wholeheartedly

to live again @/viastro

it’s been years since your last milestone birthday; a time when everything still felt right in the world with youth and ambition. now that you’re older and times have changed, would you dare take a chance to save someone else in the past at the cost of your own future?

notes: oh. my. GOD. this fic is oh sosososo good and i loved the slow burn too. i never expected to have such a lasting impression on a fic but this one is just *chefs kiss* i love it so much, it’s definitely somewhere at the top of my fav fics

ode to you @/lovelyhan

if there's one thing you've learned from all the lives you've spent together, it's that jeonghan isn't always someone you'll end up wanting. he can be crass. he can be secretive. he can be nothing short of vexing. but in the end, he's everything you need him to be. or: 25 lives in which you find and don't find jeonghan.

notes: this story was so cute and i love how it was created 🥹 i really liked it and i hope yall will too cause this is a great read, and every single life was so good

proud @/blue-jisungs

hi this is a req ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ i am SUCH a strong believer that jeonghan babies u no matter what or when. even in front of his members n theyre js like erm get a room?

notes: this is super cute and fluffy, also scoups 😭😭 so funny

my heart is beating for two @/seuonji

you’re a worker at the daycare and of course, your main priority is the safety of the kids. how’d you deal with an unfamiliar face trying to pick up one of the kids one day?

jeonghan becomes fond of the daycare worker he met the other day, seems like fate is on his side through this journey, or is it?

jeonghan becomes fond of the daycare worker he met the other day. they finally exchanged numbers! how does it go on from there?

notes: all three parts are all sososo good and i loved reading each one. this story is so cute and i just loved reading it and i reallly recommend it🥹

daisies @/viastro

the best type of revenge is to hurt the person that means the most to them. aka, in which jeonghan is in charge of making you fall in love with him, just to break your heart.

notes: OMG THIS IS SO GOOD!! i really enjoyed this and i loved reading the whole thing 🫶🫶🫶

beef @/wondernus

in which yoon jeonghan (the random guy you gamed with) found your twitter account, prompting the largest and ugliest twitter beef you've ever been in.

notes: this is so. incredibly. funny. i literally never knew i needed this fic in my life its just so good 😭

the selfish dilemma @/joonsytip

It was love at first sight ever since you laid eyes on Jeonghan. To him, you are the annoying co-worker who keeps asking him out. No one is new to your courting agenda which only pisses off Jeonghan but what happens when you stop, all at once....

notes: this series is incredibly good and i loved. reading it. i really recommend cause it was a great fic and it still stands as a great one

love café @/chocosvt

while you’ve spent the last few months pretending the love café doesn’t exist, you realize you need its services now more than ever. this brings you face to face with jeonghan, the son of a luxury fashion designer who’s got money to burn. your exchanges are strictly business. until they’re not.

notes: LOVE CAFE ACTUALLY MAKES MY HEAD SPIN I LOVE IT SO MUCH. THIS WRITER WROTE IT PERFECTLY I ACTUALLY ADORE IT SO MUCH!! PLEASE READ I LOVED IT 🙏 JUST EVERYTHING AHHH, IF YOU DONT LISTEN TO ANYTHING ELSE I SAY LISTEN TO THIS LOVE CAFE IS GREAT

the long way @/trblsvt

it was just like any other shoot. go in, pose, drink water, don't get food on the clothes, and don't joke around with the staff. easy. except it wasn't that easy.

notes: i loved this one so much it was a perfect read and it’s just 😭🫶

the christmas boyfriend @/rubyreduji

when you tell your mom the little white lie that you have a boyfriend, you don’t expect it to evolve into bringing your friend with benefits home for christmas. what can go wrong?

notes: this is actually one of my TOP favorites of all time and of jeonghan fics. if it’s not even first, that is. i loved this so stinking much it’s not even comprehensible. PLEASE im begging you read this. i loved it so much. even if you aren’t reading this at christmas time, it is still a perfect fic and i absolutely love it. one of my first (maybe also my last 🤭) top fics

iris beauty @/wonunuu

you and mina have been best friends for as long as you remember. after your parents passed from a horrible car accident, mina’s parents kindly took you in, tending and caring for you as their own. at such a young age, you have learned the meaning of debt as this is your constant feeling towards your best friend and her parents. to compensate, you have showed them undoubtable loyalty, respect, love and kindness, just as they have showed you; you do everything they tell you without question. so when your best friend asks you to pretend to be her in meeting a guy she has been talking to online, your loyalty and trust are tested when you unintentionally develop feelings for him.

notes: this smau is genuinely so good and one i will read over and over again no matter how long it is. the storyline is mapped out PERFECTLY and i mightve read this all in one sitting…

how many times does it take to get smarter?

how many chances are too many chances? @/veethefreeelf

Jeonghan and you start a fwb relationship after years of being best friends. He only has two rules: no feelings and no kissing. Who’s going to break the rules first?

It’s been 6 months since the night you and Jeonghan went your separate ways. You’re sure he has moved on and you… are working on moving on. Nothing can go wrong, right?

notes: AHHHHHHHHH THE ENDING IS SO CUTE OMGGGGGGGG HAHAHAHAGAGAHAHAHHQHQHQJAHA. PLEASE READ IWHQHQGAGQGQH SO GOOOOOD

joshua:

isohel @/toruro

fairytales can be rather misleading, can't they? when you and your mother are ripped away from your life at the castle, you spend over a decade resenting the royalty. so naturally, when you find prince joshua at your doorstep, you’re more than eager to shut the door on him. but as your life takes twists and turns, you happen to find yourself in the arms of a man you never thought you'd have to see again.

notes: THIS MODERN ROYALTY AU IS JUST. PERFECTION. i believe this is a must read for all carats🫡 i loved it so much!!

untitled @/som1ig

you waited for him, and he still came, unbeknownst all odds

notes: ong this is so sweet and i loved reading this. it’s so good 🫶 (short but sweet)

you were beautiful @/viastro

a modernized cinderella au. in which you and joshua meet through your love for boba popsicles, but end up living out your very own complicated, mess filled, cinderella story.

notes: ONE IS SO BEAUTIFUL AND EACH MOMENT MADE ME WANT MORE. the angsty parts.. the fluff.. this one is defff a top read!! i recommend it to all (even non-joshua stans but idk if i trust u if u arent one even in the slightest 🤨)

so beautiful @/blue-jisungs

whipped prince!joshua

notes: AGAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA IM TOO HAPPY OMGGGG JOSHUA IS PORTRAYED SO GOOD AS A BF OMG AHAHAHHAHAHH AGHHHHHHHHH🙏🙏

jun:

hoshi:

wonwoo:

gamer bf! wonwoo hc @/blue-jisungs

notes: ngl i thought it would be how he would be like a discord mod bf.. (💀) but in reality it was vv cute and nice 🙌

for the books @/trblsvt

wonwoo's students seemed intent on matching him up with a fellow teacher. he didn't really want to stop them, it was too funny for him to break up their fun. plus, he didn't mind the certain someone he was being "set up" with.

notes:this one is a good one!! very nice and the students are 💯 top tier

take it easy (slowly carve out my heart) @/savventeen

wonwoo's assignment: become your husband and bide his time until given the command to kill you. a simple mission, really — one that shouldn't have been hard. except, he never accounted for the fact that he might actually fall in love with you. too bad he's the perfect little soldier.

notes: in my own words, “this made me truly sob. made me wrench my heart out. this is amazing angst. this is the only kind of amazing angst i want to read now ♾️♾️♾️”

to my youth @/viastro

in a world where everyone finds out who loves them within a 10 meter radius through the app love alarm, confessing your feelings without the use of the app is no longer considered normal. however, you refuse to download it in hopes that you’ll be able to fall in love without being dependent on love alarm.

notes:ngl in general ALL of viastro’s smaus deserve to be read fr.. like this one is so cute!! wonwoo in some of the moments just make me 😍😍 also the angst was fr sooo good

woozi:

dokyeom:

mingyu:

minghao:

seungkwan:

vernon:

dino:

multiple:

camp half-blood @/som1ig

the camp half blood is a greek demigod training facility located on the north shore of long island. this series is about thirteen of its residents.

notes: i was SUCH A PJO FAN that these fics like actually cured me. i love every single one!! another must read fr 🤭

svt reaction to having a gf that’s cold on the outside, sweet and caring on the inside @/haecien

notes: this one is so cute! i loved each one and i thought it fit them well too 💕

thoughts ??? @/hanggarae

one shot smau’s about svt being horrifically down abysmal in chronological order

notes: naw these are all super funny and great to read and support when you want to have a good laugh 💯

bf texts from maknae line when they’re on tour @/holdinbacksecrets

notes:overall just vv comforting texts between reader and maknae line 🫶

it’s complicated @/lovelyhan

one commoner, two princes, and three tales far too complicated to comprehend.

notes: currently only the dino and joshua one are uploaded (waiting SO painfully for the jeonghan one) but even though them being long might make you not want to read them, every single word was chosen perfectly and both stories just blew me away i loved them so much, definitely in my top 10 fics

you still sleep with plushies (vocal team) @/blue-jisungs

notes:what can i say these hcs are just really cute

untitled @/nonranghaes

jihan finds you bundled up

notes: LMAO this one is just overall cute and some parts are def funny too

take a pic! @/cheolism

text messages of u asking ur boyfie (hyung line) for a pic <3

notes: these texts are soo funny and the pictures are chosen with care, i legit could tell, AND YOU COULDNT HAVE STARTED WITH THOSE CHEOL PICS LIKE WHAT 😫

inflection point @/lovelyhan

you love yoon jeonghan. no, scratch that. you fucking adore yoon jeonghan; so much that the moment he asks you to be in an exclusive set-up with his current partner, you accept the offer in a heartbeat. what you fail to consider, however, is who your boss’ boyfriend actually is.

things make a turn for the worse (or the better?) when jeonghan leaves you with the most insufferable person on earth. but maybe a few weeks alone is exactly what you and seungcheol needed after all.

after reconciling with your first love, all seems well in your relationship thus far. but when you notice jeonghan distancing himself from you and seungcheol, you're determined to get to the bottom of it.

notes: AHAHAHHAHAHHHHHAHHHHHH INFLECTION POINT IS SO. GOOD. I RECOMMEND EVERYONE READ IT CAUSE I LOVE IT SO MUCH!! the story is great, the story writing is even better, and it is just overall a superior fic 🙏

svt when you call them a new pet name @/lovingseventeen

notes:i actually adore this fic so much it is so cute and it’s just 🤧🥹

“saw this and it made me think of you” @/babyleostuff

notes:this one is GENUINELY so funny like how’d you find all these pictures 😭😭🫶

teasing you over your crush on them - hhu, vu, pu @/hanniehaee

notes: i loved each one and especially the style they were wrote in 🤧🫶

accidentally ditching you on your bday - hhu, vu, pu @/hanniehaee

notes: THE ANGST IS ACTUALLY SOOOOO GOOD OMG. idk if yall knew this but i used to be a diehard straight angst fan and this really reawakened that part of me. i loved how it went and the part 2 was definitely great also. (p.s. the first time i read i cried, and it’s been a while since ive cried cause on angst so i loved the pain🙏)

amortentia @/http-mianhae

love stories at hogwarts with 13 particular people

notes: currently, only 95 line is there, but each fic is perfect. it’s a hogwarts au love story, and i especially love each one. every single one is perfect and captures everything oh sosososo well. i’m really excited for future updates !!!

svt hospital @/taeyegu

four different departments, four different love stories, all in one hospital; hospitalplaylist!au

notes: omg.. this sooo cute and super funny!! i loved each one and they genuinely made me smile and laugh

have something to add? send in a request and i’ll put it in 📦

want me to make a different groups recommendation list? add in an ask too 💌

57 notes · View notes

kkcauseway · 4 months

Text

Oh Baby P3

Chapter summary: The end is nigh, what you've been waiting for is finally here. Baby is coming! and you have the best support, Joel really is so good at everything he does. It's a hard labour but Joel helps you through it in the best possible way. Chapter warnings and content: Tw-childbirth, pregnancy, waters breaking. Breast/nipple play, I guess pregnancy kink kinda? Unprotected PinV, Caring!Joel, Parent!Joel. Joel being the best girl dad. Events of after the outbreak. Word count: 6.6K Authors note: Part three we made it! The end of an era eeek! i really hope you enjoy reading this!

Series Masterlist I Main Masterlist

You’re sat up in bed when Joel finally wakes. Its only six, but it’s like he can sense when something isn’t right. You’ve been awake for a while, but he must’ve felt your presence leave the room to make the tea or felt as you slipped back into bed but didn’t get yourself comfortable next to him again.

“You okay Baby?” he questions sleepily on seeing that you’re sat up in bed with a cup of herbal tea, visibly tired, but unable to sleep.

“She’s awake so y’know what that means” you groan stroking your stomach with one hand when your back spasms. “And of course, I’ve been having the nightly occurrence of pains” you roll your eyes.

“Oh, y’gonna be okay today?” he sits up studying you.

“Yeah Baby” you reach out to stroke his cheek, “I’m more than-”

“Used to them by now” he finishes for you. “Yeah, I know Baby I just hate you being like this. Y’know this patrol today, I don’t have to go, Tommy and Maria both said I didn’t need to do anymore especially with how you’ve been.”

You chuckle, “I know Joel, but you’ve also been losing your mind being cooped up, don’t try, and lie and say you haven’t, cus you have. I’ll have Ellie with me all day! You’ll be back before you even realise you’ve gone, trust me I’ll be okay, so stop worrying.” You chuckle, but then wince the laughing causing your boobs to bounce. “Fuck my boobs are really sore” you whine.

And Joel knows exactly what that means he needs to do. In about one of the only ways, he can make you feel better.

He sits up in an instant. Dirty smirk on his face. “They just need a lil bit of loving s’all don’t they?” So, he bends to draw his tongue over your nipple twirling it round and round before biting softly, he then does the same on the other.

He begins to massage them in his warm large palms causing you to moan and writhe. “Needy again aint yah Baby? Never known someone who needs to fuck so often.” He chuckles taking one hand away to find its way to your core. Stroking his fingers through the slick of your wet cunt before spreading it to you clit and circling. Setting a pace that has you nearing release almost instantly.

“Mmm Joel” you whimper.

“Such a good girl, I’ll make you feel good don’t worry” he squeezes your breasts harder. Taking them back into his mouth as he puts more pressure on your clit, whilst shoving a finger in and out of your tight hole.

“Ugh, g- gonna cum Joel.”

“S’it good girl give it to me!” he demands into your breast, not letting up his pace.

You lose yourself after hearing his gruff voice once more. His ability to make you feel things you never thought you’d be able to leaves you forever wanting. So really, it’s his fault you wana fuck all the time.

“Fuck me” you whisper when his fingers eventually leave your core. Still shaking post orgasm. Your whole body already begging to be filled once more.

“Yeah? S’that what y’need?”

“Yeah” you whisper.

He helps you to lie on your side then before slotting in behind you lifting your thigh ever so slightly as he aims himself at your aching cunt. He pushes in all the way on one agonising thrust. Bringing a hand round to touch your breasts once more “I’ll make you feel better Baby.” He whispers into your ear as he begins to move.

“Ugh Joel” you moan.

“Come on Baby know you’ve got another one in there for me.” He coaxes moving slowly within you holding you tight as he finds a new, deeper angle.

🩷

Once satisfied Joel then helps you to get ready for the day. It’s Tuesday and as arranged you and Ellie are watching Ted so Maria can go to her important council meeting and of course as per, Joel and Tommy are out on a patrol. The pains you had through the night every so often left you completely restless. You definitely feel as though they’re different, even if it’s only a slight difference. Looking after Ted will mean you have your hands full, you’re already glad of the distraction and it’s not even begun.

On his insistence Joel slowly walks you over to Tommy and Maria’s. Not satisfied until you’re content in the house. There’s no sign of Ellie when you first arrive but it’s not long until she knocks. “Sorry overslept” she utters out of breath when Joel opens the door to her.

With Ellie as your personal ‘aide’ for the day, him and Tommy leave for their patrol and then it isn’t long till Maria goes to meet the council. Explaining they’re determining someone’s fate, on if they get to stay in Jackson or not after an incident on a previous patrol.

🩷

You lap up every second of your nephews company. Enjoying him being crazy till he tires himself out and then all warm and snuggly.

You’re snuggling with Ted on the sofa after having some lunch. Ellie offering to wash up. He’s curls up round your bump, his head resting against your chest as he watches a cartoon. He’s sleepy but fighting it. You can’t wait to do this with your own baby.

“Heyyy!” Ted suddenly shouts lifting his head to look down at your stomach.

“What’s up Teddy?”

“The baby kickeded me!”

You laugh “They’re just sayin’ hi! They know that their cousin Teddy is close.” You stroke your belly, and he follows the pattern you draw with his own palm. Content for a second until his crazy three-year-old mind begins whirring again.

“Why am I the baby’s cos-un?” he questions looking at you.

“Why are you the baby’s cousin?”

“Yah!”

“Well remember I told you this before, your daddy and Uncle Joel are brothers, aren’t they?”

He nods “yeah, I love my Uncle Joel and my daddy, they’re the bestest!”

“Yeah, they are huh? Well, they are brothers and you’re daddy’s baby aren’t you and then this baby is Uncle Joel’s baby. So that makes you and this baby cousins.”

“Is it fun?”

“Fun being a cousin?”

He nods looking to you curiously.

“Oh yes, the most fun! When I was your age, I loved my cousins more than anyone else in the whole wide world! We had weekends where we used to make blanket forts and eat loads of sweets!”

“Yay! I’m so ‘sited! I want the baby to come now! Can they come now?” he looks to the bump once more.

“They’ll come soon don’t worry, but right now they want a snack! Do you want one too?”

“Yes peaseeee!” you smile at one another then before going on a mission to find food.

🩷

Throughout the day you notice the pains you have seem to be slightly different, but you’re so distracted running around after Ted that you don’t take too much notice. It’s always in the back of your mind though that this could potentially be ‘it’, and it’s an exciting prospect.

The day is over before you know it and with Maria arriving back, you tell Ellie she can go and meet Dina if she wants, which of course she does. She jumps at the chance. Anyone would think she hates your company, but then you remember what it felt like to be young and in love-which she definitely is (even if she wont admit it to you), and so you can’t blame her for the way she behaves.

With Ted finally down for a nap you get started on cooking with Maria’s help. Getting some lovely food ready for your boys for when they get back from their exhausting day on patrol. You find this to be the best opportunity to finally relay your feelings to Maria.

“Maria, I think there’s a chance I could be in labour? Maybe I’m not sure. How did you know you were in labour?”

“What? Why are you thinking that?” she startles. “And my waters broke it all started there for me, but not everyone’s waters break right away.”

“Well, these pains today are definitely seeming to be different. Only a little, but they seem to be in more of a pattern too. And they’ve never been in a pattern before.”

“Oh, how exciting! It might be especially if you say there’s more of a pattern.”

“Guess we will have to wait and see huh?” you giggle so excited at the thought it could be.

You leave Maria to go to the bathroom a short while later, with a real sudden urge to go, but stop in your tracks along the way, not even making it out of the kitchen. You feel something trickle and find yourself gripping your stomach.

“Maria!?” it comes out squeaky.

“Yeah?” she turns from the stove to look at you. “What’s wrong, what’s up?”

“How long till the boys get back?”

“Erm only about an hour or so now why?” she looks to her watch then back to you.

“I think my water might have just broke.”

“What really are you sure? You, okay?” she’s quick to be at your side walking you over to a chair and helps you to sit.

“Yeah, I think so. Like I said I’ve had pains off and on all day and I knew they felt different to my usual but of course I wasn’t sure, although it was in the back of my mind, but this now I can feel it leaking out of me. Oh God this is actually happening.” You laugh. Finding yourself not panicking, but everything seems to be hitting you at once and you can’t seem to stop talking. Always one for nervous chatter.

“Okay just take a breath!” Maria laughs “Are you okay? You need anything?”

“I’m fine, excited, nervous” you laugh. “I’m gonna, ouch!” you moan briefly feeling a spasm in your back. “I’m gonna go put a pad on, cus otherwise this chairs gonna get all wet, I’ll be back” you wink.

Maria helps you to stand holding you when your back spasms again.

It’s whilst you’re in the bathroom that you have your first proper contraction. You sway your body side to side as you breathe softly, rubbing at your hardening stomach. You can’t believe it’s finally happening. That the day is finally here after waiting and praying for so long, you can’t wait to finally meet your baby. It makes you smile. You’re at a point in your life that you always dreamed of but never though would happen. Especially with adding the end of the world into the mix. You’ve never ever been happier.

After sorting yourself out you walk back to the kitchen smiling at Maria upon entry.

“It’s definitely happening, had a proper contraction in the bathroom.”

“Amazing… Man, it makes me want another one so badly! Think Ted would love a little brother or sister, don’t you? I’ve radioed down, they’re only 30 minutes out so won’t be long, don’t worry I didn’t say why I was asking would give Joel a heart attack if I did” she chuckles. “But we’ll keep an eye on you, call for Jen if we need her, if not, let’s get some food in you and then you and Joel can go to the clinic afterwards, okay? Unless you feel like you need to go now, if you do we’ll go I’ll drop Ted with Ellie at Dina’s?”

“No honestly, I’m fine for now, the second we need to go, we’ll go. I’m starving though, can’t wait to eat!” you giggle.

“That’s good you’ll need all the strength you can get, so a big meal will work wonders. You just stay comfy here I’ll finish the food.” She smiles at you rubbing your shoulder.

🩷

Dinner is served just in time for when the boys make it home. Ted is now awake from his nap, being fed by his mother as Tommy strides in walking straight over to her to give her a kiss. “Hey Sugar.”

“Hey Babe.” She utters against his lips.

You quickly stand to go and find Joel, whose by the door taking off his boots.

“Joel” you utter softly.

“Hey Darlin’.” Evident relief in his face upon seeing you after a long day.

“Hope you’re feeling brave.”

“What, why?”

“My water broke.”

“What?”

“My water broke not that long ago.”

“Shit” he jumps up “Do we not need to”-

“No not yet” you cut him off. “Second we need to go to the clinic we’ll go. I just don’t want to be in there for any longer than I need to.”

“Okay Baby, whatever you wana do, you promise me you’re, okay?” he pulls you in for a hug.

“Contractions are about 15 minutes apart roughly me and Maria have been working out. It’s obviously going to be a long labour and they hurt, but I’m fine. Very, very glad to have you home though” you kiss him.

“My gorgeous Baby, I love you.” He utters pulling away briefly before kissing you again even harder. “Still can’t believe you’re makin’ me a daddy again.”

“Well believe it” you whisper. “Come on lets go eat before it gets cold.” You smile as he puts his arm round you as you begin walking back.

“Fuck...” you suddenly whimper. Your whole-body tensing and you seek Joel instantly. Turning your body into him as you moan through the pain.

“You got this girl” he holds you close as you moan through the pain, “just remember to breathe” he coaxes.

When the pain depletes you stand and look him in the eye “They aren’t that bad yet, I’m okay I promise” you smile as he smiles back at you. He places a delicate kiss to your forehead as you close your eyes from the feeling. Opting to wrap his arm back around your waist as you continue walking into the room, you note how worried he seems already.

“Jeez y'look like you’ve seen a ghost!” Tommy jests upon seeing his brother.

“No ghosts, I just told him my water broke!” You announce excitedly.

Instantly Tommy’s face changes, to an expression identical to that of his older brothers. Just as you expected.

“Exactly brother.” Joel laughs. “Now do y’get it.”

“Man, family’s gonna be expandin’ again, can’t wait!” Tommy mutters big smile on his face before he begins eating.

“Me too” You reply happily sitting at the table with the help of Joel.

“Unc Joe, the baby kickeded me today!” Ted announces when Joel takes his seat.

He gasps dramatically “did they now?”

“Uhu” He nods.

Joel chuckles lightly. “I’ll make sure to tell her off” he winks to his nephew who tries to wink back but blinks.

“Hey where’s Ellie?” Joel interrupts the silence not long later.

“I’m surprised it took you so long to notice haha, where d’you think?”.

“Need I ask, they’re obsessed with one another I swear” he shakes his head laughing.

About an hour after Joel makes it home it’s clear it’s time for you to go to the clinic. Contractions now around ten minutes apart, but with your waters already broke you decide rather to be safe than sorry. So, you pack up what you need and make the journey over.

🩷🤍🩷🤍🩷

Two hours after arriving:

“Fuck it hurts Joel!” you moan.

“I know Baby, I know, you just keep going, you’re doing so good.” He pushes on your back as you lean over the bed.

You breathe in and out the way you’d read to in the preparing for childbirth books Joel had found on one of his patrols.

“Good you got this Baby; y’know exactly what you’re doing.”

“I’m just so tired Joel” you whimper letting out a long sad sigh through the pain “why won’t she just come out!”

“She’s coming, I promise she’s coming, just taking her sweet time; wants to make an entrance. Come on you’re her mama after all, she’s gotta at least try t’be as dramatic as you.”

You laugh, Joel actually manages to make you laugh as the pain finally beginning to subside.

“God help us if she’s like me” you jest rolling your eyes.

“Well, I for one hope she’s just like you, would love to have two of you around to keep me company.”

“Yeah, then add Ellie into the mix, you’re gonna have your fuckin’ hands full Miller!” you laugh.

“Can’t wait” he mumbles instantly. And boy does he mean it. His life will be complete once he has his three girls, even if one of them is looking down on him rather than living life with him.

With the pain now completely subsided you stand up straight, leaning back against Joel’s chest as he cuddles you tighter to him with the squeeze of his arm.

You rub a hand over your protruding stomach.

“God I can’t wait to meet her.”

“Me too Baby, me too.” Joel brings his right hand to your stomach and strokes, his left arm still holding your chest to squeeze you ever closer to him.

“She’s our biggest blessin’ ‘sides Ellie, and of course my Sarah, ain’t never been more excited than when she was born, even if I was shitting myself. I can’t wait to do it all again.”

Joel openly talks about Sarah to you now, it took a while, but he always tells you there’s no one he trusts more than you, and you see Sarah as your daughter too now in a way, never having had the pleasure of meeting her, seeing her gorgeous face in person breaks your heart; you keep the picture he has of him and her out on display constantly. But God you know just how much Joel cherished every single second of fatherhood; that girl never wanted for anything. It makes you smile knowing this baby is going to have the world’s greatest dad.

“Me too I can’t wait. Man I can’t believe we’ve finally made it here.” You finally add placing one of your palms over Joel’s knuckles and you both just stand there. Stroking your bump. Embracing the last moments before the bump is gone and the baby is here. A whole new future awaits.

Joel rests his chin on your shoulder, eventually talking softly into your ear. “Shall we get you comfy before it’s time to go again? Or are you okay staying like this Baby?”

“Erm, I think I’ll get back on the bed actually, yeah. If I sit, will you sit with me, hold me? You’re about the only thing keeping me sane right now.” You laugh before you look at him, your beautiful eye gleam that he fell in love with still evident, even though you’ve been doing this for hours.

He smiles “Course. You know I will Darlin.” He kisses the tip of your nose.

He then helps you to climb back onto the clinic bed and with you sitting in a somewhat comfortable position he toes off his boots and climbs to sit behind you, he spreads his legs to make room so you can get yourself comfortable; head resting on his chest, hands stroking your belly. Joel begins to play with your hair, gently tickling your scalp with his fingertips.

It’s silent for a moment. So comfortable.

“Don’t you think it’s crazy that we made her. That she’s a part of us?” you utter softly; content.

“I know it’s the craziest thing, thought the exact same with Sarah, n’when I held her for the first time and her eyes looked up at me it’s like she recognised I was part o’her. And I just couldn’t believe I made her; well partly. That she came from me.”

“She was so lucky to have had a daddy like you.”

“Think you mean, I was lucky to have her. She was absolutely perfect. The love of my life. I’d never known love like it, didn’t know my heart could hurt that much with this need to protect, to love. She was my Babygirl, will always be my first and she was my entire world. Just like you are, and Ellie is andddd” he reaches down to your belly poking it, “this girl is.”

You chuckle lightly.

“What we gonna call her?” You question as it goes silent once more.

“I don’t know Darlin’ you got any ideas?”

You sigh solemnly “None, yet.”

“Well let’s see her face first, I’m sure when we see her it’ll click.”

“Yeah, I hope so, or maybe Ellie could help pick?”

“I love that idea” he chuckles lightly.

“I can’t wait to- ffff - fuck- holy shit- ugh Joel!” you begin to curl into yourself as the pain waves over you.

“Okay Babygirl, you’re okay just breathe, breathe, good girl. I got you; I got you” Joel strokes your cheek with one hand the other hand being squeezed by yours.

“Fuck- Joel it really hurts. Holy Fuck!”

Maria walks in then with Jen the midwife of Jackson following closely behind, placing on a fresh pair of gloves; obviously coming back to check you once more. Maria observes how you’re curled into Joel. Screaming in agony.

“Oh dear!” Maria says softly as she runs to your side grabbing your other hand and letting you squeeze.

“How we doin?” Jen questions.

“It hurts so much, fuck Jen! How have some people here done this like five fuckin’ times… fuckin’ lunatics!”

That raises a laugh from everybody.

“I know honey I know, it’s so worth it though I promise.” Maria adds.

“Hey, look at me sweetie” Jen asks, and you look up at her the pain still ripping through you. “Just remember the breathing exercises I told you about, okay? Big breath in, hold for four, then out.”

You nod before copying her, eyes watering.

“That’s it, goooood, see you know what to do. You’re a fighter mama.” She smiles at you in praise.

It takes a minute or two longer for you to fully recover from the pain. When you finally spread back out alleviating some of the pressure in your back, you look to Maria with a pained smile as Joel continues to caress your belly.

“I can examine you again now if you’d like, see how you’ve progressed?” Jen suggests.

“Yeah, okay please, I just need her out” you whimper.

She nods makes her way over to you after washing her hands thoroughly but quickly, wanting to ensure the examination is over before you’re in pain again, asking you to put your heels to your bottom, legs nice and wide apart. You do so swiftly and take hold of Joel’s hands.

“Just some slight pressure okay just take a breath for me.”

You wince as she checks you. Gripping Joel’s hands in your own tight.

“Okay good eight centimetres look at you go girl! Racing through! Won’t be too much longer now okay.”

“Oh, thank God!” you cry.

“Nearly there!” Maria praises before adding “Oh by the way, I just came back in to let you know Ellie’s right outside, she’s there with Dina.” You follow her finger as she points, looking through the small window in the door and find Ellie and Dina both pacing outside “They’re both refusing to leave. Ellie asked if she could come and see you, I said I’d ask you?” Maria continues.

“Yeah, course she can come in, she doesn’t have to ask!”

Maria nods at you with a smile before she walks back outside of the room and fetches Ellie, you watch through the small door window how Ellie gives Dina a kiss on the lips before parting from her. You shift slightly on Joel’s chest in as much as an effort as you can to look up at him.

“So, they’re an actual thing now- finally?”

He looks down at you a smile on his face as he begins to caress your cheek.

“I don’t know Baby, but they look pretty cosy to me.”

“I hope so, Ellie deserves to be happy. Dina’s so good for her; I think they complete each other”

“She does Darlin’ you’re right. And yeah, I agree Ellie seems much calmer with Dina. If that’s at all possible.” He chuckles before he kisses the top of your head.

With Dina and Ellie parted, she walks in, and comes straight to give you a hug.

“Hey Els, you okay?” You kiss the top of her head before she pulls away shocked.

“Why are you asking if I’m okay? Course I am, you’re getting ready to push an entire human out of” she gestures to between your legs. “How the fuck are you?”

“Well Joel’s a pretty good help. So that’s something, but fuck it hurts.” You half laugh half moan.

You try your best not to swear in front of Ellie but a whole human is about to rip itself from your body and if that doesn’t give you a free pass, well then nothing does…

“You best be helping her out properly Dino? Don’t wana hear no reports that you’ve been slacking on the job” Ellie looks to Joel then, pointing her finger.

“Dino?” he quizzes. “That’s new” he chuckles.

“Yeah, well you know being born during the Mesozoic era kinda comes with the nickname.” She says giving a nonchalant shrug.

You laugh then, but you’re the only one, Joel’s face remains straight, emotionally untouched. There’s no reaction whatsoever. Eventually he urges “Hmmm, remind me to bring that back up later.” face still unreadable, but it’s clear he’s joking around.

“Sure thing old man” she winks.

“Enough with the old, s’like you wana send me to an early grave.” He sniggers lightly the seriousness forgotten.

“Yes sir” she salutes. “And may I just add I do not want to do that, you might be old but you’re gonna live forever, please and thank-you.” She smiles and Joel salutes her back understanding and accepting of her demands, like he’d ever leave his girls!

She reaches for your belly then, slowly, and gently caressing it, as she takes a seat on the stool next to the bed.

“So, how’s my little sister doin?”

“Yeah, she’s good, planned her escape well, just a shame I’m paying the price in the way I am” you sigh.

“She’s doing great, they’re both doing great” Jen adds in from the side lines with a smile looking over her shoulder briefly before focusing back on prepping everything ready in the room.

“Hey anyway,” Ellie begins, cheeky smile on her face as she chuckles lightly “you chose to get in this mess, so you gotta get back out of it. Not that I wana think about how you got in this situation… ew” she grimaces.

“Well, she’s got you there hasn’t she Darlin’?” Joel adds softly.

“Yeah, I know, but hey you can’t say you aren’t happy we chose this” you tap her lightly.

“Definitely, I’m super happy can’t wait!” Ellie almost bursts as she replies.

“Exactly!” you shout back.

You wince as another pain begins to take over. Rather than curling into yourself this time you begin to straighten yourself out, sitting upright in your place on the bed. Allowing your upper body to rock slightly. Joel sits up with you adjusting so he can properly access your shoulders as he begins to rub. You scream as the pain rips through you, Ellie grabs your hand, and you squeeze “ahhh fuck fuck fuck fuck” she’s quick to add.“Sorry!” you manage to moan back through gritted teeth.

You pant and pant as your body feels paralysed from the pain. It seems to go on and on, and it leaves you traumatised. Beads of sweat run down your forehead and your eyes well with more fresh tears.

When it eventually begins to ease you drop back against Joel, completely and utterly exhausted. Finally Letting go of Ellie’s hand.

Joel shushes you as you weep quietly; you take quick deep breaths.

“Fuck Joel, I just want her out!” you cry.

“Soon Babygirl I promise soon.”

You then look at Ellie, “I’m so sorry El, I didn’t meant to hurt you.” That makes you cry even more. You really didn’t mean to squeeze so hard; she didn’t deserve that.

Fuck your spiralling. Everyone knows you had no intention of hurting anyone.

“You didn’t hurt me, just didn’t realise you could grip so hard I was shocked, you’re even more badass than I thought” she responds.

All four of you laugh then.

🩷🤍🩷🤍🩷

2 hours later

Ellie is gone, shooed away when every other word of the sentences you were stringing together became expletives. The pain unbearable and you don’t want Ellie to be witness to you in this state. Maria has gone back home to her beautiful family showing her face for support a few times before you begged for her to go on home to be the mama she deserves to be, rather than having to be witness to this. It’s just you and Joel. So utterly in love. So desperately in need for one another; to be close. Jen close at hand the whole time but it’s just you and Joel, in your love bubble. Nothing else in the world matters but this moment; cherishing your last moments together before the baby comes.

🩷

It’s on the next examination after a particular awful pain that you finally hear what you’ve been longing for “You can push, you’re there!” It’s music to your ears, you let out the biggest sigh of relief, as does Joel.

“Y’hear that Darlin’?” he chuckles excitedly.

“She’s coming” you whisper panting hard.

“She is Baby, she’s comin’!”

“Let me know when you have a pain sweetie and let’s get this show on the road! Soon as that pain hits start pushing into your bum. Don’t want any noise okay you focus all your energy on pushing down, getting this baby out.”

You nod smiling at her slightly still panting.

“It’s coming!” you shout breathing speeding up.

“Okay great sweetie listen to your body and just go with it, push this baby out let’s go!” she encourages.

“C’mon Baby you got this!” Joel screams in encouragement from behind you. Still cradling you the way he has been for hours. His knees are bent as are yours your body fitting into the shape of him. He makes you feel safe, he makes you feel as though you have the energy to keep going even when you’re desperate to quit.

As the pain comes over full throttle you push giving it absolutely everything that you’ve got. It’s silent as you squeeze and squeeze. Face getting redder by the second, but you can feel what’s going on and it keeps you going, pushing till you’re desperate to take a breath.

“Good!” Jen shouts in praise. “Big breath in and go again if you can, let’s get their head out!”

And so, you do “Come on Baby, doing so well m’so proud of you!” Joel encourages gripping his hands over your thighs tighter pushing your knees closer to your chest to help as you push, just as you’d requested.

The second push gets most of the head out and you give once more, not allowing yourself a rest till you know this babies head is free from your body. With one more all mighty, slightly noisy push, you gasp in relief as you feel the head pops out. Your whole body relaxes. You’re panting hard, beads of sweat swimming on your forehead. Joel releases his grip on your thighs in case you decide to move in any way.

“Well done, that was absolutely wonderful!” Jen adds rubbing your knee in praise. “Take some nice deep breaths for me now, wait for the next contraction okay, well done!”

“Can I feel her head?” You question looking into Jen’s eyes your vision blurred as tears threaten release.

“You don’t need to ask, they’re yours course you can” she smiles.

You quickly bring a hand between your legs, gripping your tiny babies head. “Is that hair?”

“Sure is!”

“Oh Joel, you need to feel her and all her hair.” You turn your head to the side as much as possible to try to gain eye contact with him.

He looks down at your sweaty face, the tired replaced with a newfound energy at knowing this is all almost over. “Can I?” he questions you. He’d absolutely love to, but only if you’re certain.

“Yeah” you whisper.

He manoeuvres himself slightly so he can reach over you without shifting you too much, coming to bring his hand to grasp his tiny new babies head.

“Oh” he gasps wetly.

“Doesn’t she feel beautiful” you utter quietly still panting.

“So beautiful” he whispers.

“Oh fuck” you whisper before beginning to pant, “I can feel it coming!” you suddenly shout, the next pain taking hold.

Joel is quick to remove his hand, sitting back in the bed and grabbing your thighs once more, this time your hands join his, willing your legs to be as open as possible to get this baby out promptly.

You push again feeling as the baby much more easily now begins to slide from your body. You quickly gasp between pushes.

“One more big, big push and baby will be here!” and that’s all you need to hear.

You push for a final time screaming the roof down with this one. Your body wills and the baby is out. And then it’s all over. Your body heaves, so relieved, so drained, so excited.

You’re quick to release your thighs along with Joel and you sit up, him following resting his chin on your shoulder as Jen hands you your screaming baby. You cradle them against your chest as they squirm and scream at their first look of their new world.

“Oh, she’s here, she’s here!” you cry. As Jen grabs a towel wiping the baby over as you hold them close.

“M’so proud of you” Joel mutters quietly allowing himself to release the tears he’d been holding.

“Oh, I know shhh” you hold them close to you willing the cry’s to settle down which they do quickly. “Good, shhhh there you go.” You move the baby to be cradled in your arms then; tiny body and face squishing into you as they’re already on a mission to try to find food.

“Guess we should confirm it’s definitely a girl huh?” Joel practically whispers.

You chuckle wetly slowly moving one of the cute bundles legs so you can check. Going into a fit of giggles with that you see.

“Well would y’look at that” Joel chuckles lightly. “Another daughter. How lucky am I!”

“My beautiful baby girl” you whisper to her crying.

“Daddy do you wana cut the cord?” Jen questions after a few minutes.

“Sure.” He quicks takes the scissors from her, and the cord is cut, she’s separate now, her own person.

“Lemme move Baby so you can lie down with her, okay?” You nod as he moves from behind you slowly on the bed helping you to lie back against the pillows. He stands at your side, cooing over his brand-new healthy, pink, content flesh and blood. His smile so wide it hurts.

“We’re just waiting on the placenta okay sweetie, I’m just gonna push on your belly a little, okay?” Jen asks but you’re not paying that much attention, besotted with your new daughter.

“Okay” you nod, wincing at first touch, jumping slightly from the pressure. “Jen wait a sec” and she stops instantly.

“You, okay?” she’s quick to ask.

“Yeah just” you turn to look at Joel. “Will you cuddle her daddy? Whilst we do this I just don’t wana hurt her if I flinch or something.”

“Music to my ears Baby, gimme my daughter, we need some daddy daughter time.” He grabs her gently ensuring she’s still wrapped in the blanket shushing her as she groans; but not before taking off his shirt so he can have some skin to skin contact with her, opting to grab another blanket to further wrap her as he holds her close.

He sits just for a moment with his newborn daughter as she looks to him, and he looks down on her studying the features of her father. It doesn’t take long for her to begin smacking her lips together, desperately needing food. Thankfully, the placenta has now been delivered and so Joel is quick to return his daughter to your chest once Jen has propped you up better with the pillows so nursing will be comfortable.

As soon as you take your daughter back from him, he’s there at hand to help you to ease your daughter into feeding at the breast. No help is needed from Jen as the child latches almost instantly. Guzzling away once a steady flow is being released. It isn’t without winces from you which keep making Joel jump, but you assure him it’s all because it’s new, you’re not in pain just in shock. You’ve grown and birthed an entire human. A human you’re now responsible for. And god she is gorgeous.

She’s out cold after a feed, lying against your chest snoring softly, you and Joel both can’t keep your hands off her.

Joel hears you sniffling softly, and it suddenly dawns on him that you’re crying.

“S’wrong baby? You in pain?” you can hear just how worried he is.

“No, no I just- hiccup- I just am so in love with her, and it’s making me cry and I can’t stop.”

He shushes you gently, kissing your temple “I know Baby she��s so beautiful. You did it! You did it so well, brought her safely into this world!”

“I can’t believe it’s over, after everything we went through.”

“It’s not over Baby, this chapter might be, but we have so much now that’s only just starting. The beginning of so so much!”

“I know, I just I’m so happy and so excited… where’s Ellie, I miss her, and I want her to meet her sister?”

“Jen went to get her. I said don’t bother going to Tommy’s she will be with Dina” he chuckles lightly.

“Haha yep one thing about that girl is, she’s so predictable” you laugh back wetly.

🩷

Its about twenty minutes later that Ellie is back, ecstatic at the prospect of meeting her sibling.

“Holy shit, I can’t believe that they’re actually here!” she exclaims as she first enters the room. She runs straight to your bedside admiring her sleeping sibling.

“Ellie, meet your sister” you utter softly.

“Sister? Damn you guys were actually right all along. Haha that’s brilliant. Oh, by the way I brought her this”, she offers over a blue t-rex stuffed toy. “Gotta make sure she’s as educated as me, start her early.”

“What she’s out of the womb maybe three hours and she’s already due a lesson?” Joel remarks.

“Hey, you can never start them too early!”

You chuckle.

“You wana hold her?” you question kissing your daughters head when she stirs slightly.

“Erm, I- I mean yeah I do, but I’m a bit out of practice with holding a baby.” She utters slightly embarrassed “I don’t know if it’s a good idea. I don’t wana drop her.”

“Trust me it’s second nature. Y’wont drop her.” Joel utters standing to allow Ellie to sit in his chair and he then begins to carefully pick your daughter up, shushing her gently when she grunts. She settles fast in her daddy’s arms. He bends slowly to lower his daughter into his older daughters hands. Releasing her only when he sees Ellies confidence shine through, and she settles into the comfortable feeling of having a baby in her arms.

Joel takes a step back coming to sit on the edge of the bed holding your hand as you both watch the sisters bond with one another. Eventually she opens her eyes and stares curiously at her big sister, Ellie brushes one of her fingers over her sisters eyebrows and smiles softly.

You stay like this for a while, content, happy, complete.

“So, what’s her name?” Ellie questions quietly.

“Well, this is the thing” Joel utters and Ellie looks to him curiously.

You add “we thought maybe you’d like to name her?”

“Me?” she’s shocked.

“Well why not?” Joel adds.

“Because I -I mean, seriously? You actually mean that?”

“We actually do” you nod.

“Well, there was actually a name that came to me the second I saw her, but I presumed you’d already have one picked out, so I didn’t say anything.”

“N’what name was that?” Joel quizzes

“To be fair it would fit for a boy too… so maybe I’d have thought it if it was a boy?” it’s clear she’s nervous to say.

“Just spit it out” Joel chuckles.

“Frankie” She announces “I think Frankie Miller sounds perfect.”

“Frankie” Joel whispers.

“Oh, Ellie, I love it.” You mumble trying to hold back tears “so beautiful.”

“Yeah, I thought so too. Well, there we go then! - Frankie Miller, welcome to the world!” she coos down at her sister whose eyes beam up at her. You and Joel are still transfixed on watching the two sisters bond.

“Welcome to the world Frankie baby” you whisper.

“Happy birthday Babygirl” Joel utters smiling.

#joel miller #the last of us #maria the last of us #pregnancy #sarah miller #angst #fluff and smut #tommy miller #after outbreak #Oh baby #Part three #pedro pascal #pedro pascal character fanfic

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qpenpals · 2 months

Text

First of all, support Shubble and support all victims (which is a statement that while said a lot, seems not be followed as frequently, however i hope those who read this abide by it)

Second, I don’t support wilbur soot/william gold, and I don’t think that anyone should after this.

Third, while this situation is not about me, i have feelings and opinions about it that i would like to share, but even if you don’t read anymore,

Please watch shelby’s vod, and maybe try checking her content out, because while i don’t frequently watch her, i enjoy her streams and maybe you will too! her new hardcore series sounds great :)

This is quite long, but honestly this is kind of just for me to collect my thoughts, however if you read to the end thank you<3 im touched :)

ALSO ABUSE TRIGGER WARNING

Alright, so I have loved wilbur soot’s content for a very long time, 4 years or so. I watched the streams and listened to his music from the start. His content is entwined with many of my fond memories.

Earlier today, I had a breakdown over this whole situation, because, as I’ve been quite busy with school, my job, and other assorted things in my life, I found out about this morning. I had woken from a nightmare about my previous abuser. Who i will be talking about a lot more of as they really impacted my views on this situation.

However this nightmare had left me in a fragile mood, my girlfriend was still sleeping and i didn’t want to wake her, so to comfort myself i went to read one of my bookmarked fanfictions, this fanfiction, while i dont remember the title is one that i’ve found comforting for a very long time, so much so that when im stressed my partner has it saved to send to me so i can calm down.

It was a fanfiction about quackity and tubbo, wilbur soot was mentioned maybe 5 times, and the author had deleted it.

This caused me to try and find out why, so i went to their page and they had posted a temporary fic explaining what had been going on.

My first reaction had been disbelief, I then went to research everything. It was a lot to process.

I watched shelby’s vod. Before this i had mainly been disconnected from what i had seen, taking it it but not with any of my own feelings or thoughts really, just processing.

Shelby’s situation hits really hard for me because a lot of it mirrors my own abusive relationship of a few years ago. The wording Wilbur used against her, sounds like what my old partner would use against me. His actions, such as her having to clean and taking care of food, and amenities, were things i had to experience.

Abuse TW:

My old partner would physically abuse me through biting as well, he would claim that he just liked knowing i was his, and yet, like shubble, if i ever used our safe word, which happened so fucking often, he either wouldn’t listen, bite down harder on my neck, or fucking smile at me before letting go.

This got to the point that multiple times he had drawn blood from my neck, that i still have scars from today. And as i watch Shubble talk about her story which is ever so close to mine, I wonder that if I had watched this before, maybe i wouldn’t have stayed in that relationship.

I proceeded to stay in this relationship for 2 years before i realized how much harm he was doing to me, because i truly believed he loved me, because of all the lovebombing he would do.

End of Abuse TW:

And yet i felt pain aside from sympathy or memories, when learning of this, as the content Wilbur had put out had actually helped me out of this relationship, his music was pretty much all i listened to the months of healing after i got out and it helped, the art is good, and yet the author is one i cannot respect nor support in anyway now that i am aware.

i’d suggest watching this tiktok by @lasmanburg that really explains my thoughts and feelings on this

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTL1tb5Wg/

Right back to the content. I don’t believe that we should throw it all away, i don’t think that people should be deleting their art, fanfiction, or anything based on Wilbur. Because in the end it’s all art that we have created and interpreted and though the man who inspired it is horrible, all that has been made does not reflect his actions, but instead love and creativity from vast multifaceted community.

One can continue their writing and work because they are the ones creating it, not him, and besides most interpretations of him stray quite far from the source anyways

I think that one can continue to engage in his content as long as one does not directly support him, such as pirating his music, but personally at least right now listening to his music which brought me so much comfort-makes me feel sick. So think i’ll be taking a step back.

I don’t really know how to end this, i just needed to get my thoughts out honestly. I have therapy in an hour. I hope all of you who’ve made it to the end have a wonderful day and drink some water. I wish shelby well, and i’m glad she has been able to share this situation. And with that, I must now leave :)

#lil summary in the tags #alright so basically i don’t think people should delete their works based off of wilbur and that as long as one does not support him direct #engaging in previous content is okay #however i will likely not be posting about him anytime soon #also go check out #lasmanburg #because their videos have really helped me put my thoughts into words and i think their content is pretty swell #also if they are currently reading this hello! i hope tagging you isnt a bother #and if you’re uncomfortable i will remove it!#wilbur soot #william gold #shubble #tw abuse #i speak!#wilbur situation

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leveragehunters · 4 months

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okay, I have to ask — how do you like your kobo ereader??

I’ve been eyeing one for a while bc I really *don’t* want a kindle, but also *so* many people have a kindle that it feels like it’s the only real option

Holy crap I LOVE IT. It's so much better than the Kindle. (Also: this got long)

I decided to upgrade my old Paperwhite (it was a second gen, so pretty old and small) and I almost got a new Paperwhite automatically (cause I felt much the same as you).

But the Kobos were on the same page and since I'm trying to be less impulsive, I started poking around and they are so good.

I went with a black Libra 2 and it's like the software was actually designed for human beings, unlike the Kindle software, which I think was designed for no one except the devil.

I side-load only and keep all my books organised in collections. The only way to do collections on the Kindle is manually, one book at a time, or jailbreak (and I'm not sure you can jailbreak the new Paperwhites, plus it's such a PITA).

On the Kobo, I can build collections from within Calibre, super fast and multiple books at a time. You can also do them manually on the Kobo, but even that is SO MUCH EASIER than on the Kindle.

The actual screen reading experience is basically identical (you can even side-load the Kindle font if you want it), since e-ink is pretty much e-ink, but it has few extra 'while you're reading' tweaks, like setting the all around margin size of the book (great if you switch between books and comics) and controlling the presence of, and info in, the top and bottom bar (pages left in book, pages left in chapter, percentage left to go etc). It also has a brightness and a warmness setting, so you can tweak those til they're just right for you.

I'm loving the physical page turn buttons so much - way easier than having to swipe the screen. I can hold the Kobo in one hand and just page forward with my thumb. It's also a teeny tiny bit lighter than my old Paperwhite.

I also love that you can 'archive' any books you've bought from Kobo, so they don't show up on the e-reader (you can still get them from Kobo later if you want), unlike Amazon where they're always right there unless you delete them forever. Like I said, I side-load everything, I don't want to see the Amazon-displayed copies. I don't want to see the Amazon displayed ANYTHING.

Kobo also doesn't advertise to you. Even in a non ad-supported Kindle, the home page of the new Kindle software shows trending and suggested books. It's bloody advertising. The home page on the Kobo shows you things about your library, with a discrete text invitation at the bottom to find new books or make a wishlist. There is a 'Discover' tab where you can see suggested books and such, but you have to actively go there, which means you're seeing it because you want to see it.

It's very intuitive to use - there's tabs down the bottom that do what they say on the tin and the settings are clear what they do. If it goes to sleep on 'Books' it wakes up on 'Books'. If you have authors sorted by last name it shows them all sorted by last name (this was endless aggravation on the Kindle which seemed to have an 'I do whatever the fuck I like' approach). It displays a cute little 'sleeping' when it's asleep along with the cover of what you're currently reading (you can turn that last one off).

It natively supports a decent assortment of file types: KEPUB, EPUB, EPUB2, EPUB3, PDF, FlePub, MOBI, PDF, JPEG, GIF, PNG, BMP, TIFF, TXT, HTML, RTF, CBZ and CBR.

I cannot recommend the Kobo Libra 2 highly enough. It's the damn bees knees and I wish I'd gotten one years ago. I can't ever see going back to the Kindle.

Some pics and Calibre details under the cut (which doesn't seem to be working, darn it).

(yes I have been rereading the Kitty series)

The Calibre plugins I grabbed are below, but tbh honest you don't really NEED any of them:

I also converted my library to kepub, which isn't necessary, but gives you some nifty extra reading features.

To create Collections on your Kobo with Calibre

Decide what Calibre column you want to use for setting your Collections (I use tags, because I don't use it for anything else, but you can also make a new column in Preferences or use one of the others).

Make sure your Kobo is ejected then go to Preferences in the toolbar, locate the Import/export section, then click Sending books to devices.

For Metadata Management, choose Automatic management.

Click Apply.

Remain in Preferences, locate the Advanced section, then click Plugins.

Expand Device Interface.

Scroll down and select either Kobo Touch Extended, or if that's not present, KoboTouch.

Click Customize plugin.

Switch to the Collections, covers & uploads tab.

Checkmark Collections.

For Collections columns, enter the name of the Column you're going to use for Collections.

Checkmark Create collections.

Click OK.

Close Preferences and exit and restart Calibre.

Fancy up your library by putting your books in Collections and when you're done, Send to Device and those collections will be there, all nicely and satisfyingly organised on your Kobo.

#Kobo #Calibre #lemonsofjune #long post #no alt text #I love my new kobo SO MUCH #SO MUCH

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svnaaaaaa · 7 months

Text

Monte Carlo : Charles Leclerc AU (Part Three)

pairing : charles leclerc x fem reader

summary : amélie wants to go for an adventure, y/n confused by charles.

warning(s) : jealous charles, death of a mother (love your mother children)

previous : part two

next : part four

masterlist

author's note : hey guys, thanks for the love and support of this series. i love you guys!!

tagging : (if you want to be tagged in, let me know)

recap :

"you remember miss thomas yes?" fred asked, making y/n snapped out from her daydreaming. "uh yea, amelia yes?" charles asked, making y/n laughed a bit which caused charles to look at her weirdly. "it's amélie." y/n corrected and charles nodded his head yes, not realizing that fred have left them alone. "uh right." charles said and y/n looked at him. "it's uh, nice to see you charles." y/n said as she held out her hand for a handshake. "you too amélie." charles reached out and shooked y/n's hand. "charles, it's time." a man, probably one of the engineers pat charles' shoulder and said quietly where charles replied with a nod and turned back to y/n. "i uh, i have to go now." charles informed, y/n nodded her head yes. "good luck charles." y/n said as she smiled genuinely.

charles, who felt weird with tingling feeling inside his heart, made a small smile at y/n's way and left her be, still smiling.

"so you think that your plan won't be in fluke?" xavier asked as amélie laid onto xavier's chest, kissing it. "i don't think, i believe so." amélie replied, smiling deviously towards xavier, making him chuckled. "you look so cute with devious mind my darling." xavier pointed out, hugging amélie's shoulders. amélie giggled at xavier's praise. "you think so?" amélie asked as she reached for xavier's lips. "i know so mon cheríe." xavier replied, kissing amélie's lips.

right after the free practice 1 ended, y/n who still feels the adrenaline rush running through her veins, couldn't dare to leave the site yet, waiting patiently for charles. "oh, are you lost miss?" y/n turned around to the voice and saw a man in red suit, same as charles. "wait, are you in the same team as charles?" y/n asked back, making the man confuse, wondering if she knew charles then how come she doesn't know him as well? "uh yes, my name's carlos." carlos introduced himself, holding out his hand for y/n to shake. smiling, y/n reached for carlos' outhanded hand to shake. "y- amélie." y/n said almost spilling out her identity.

"were you waiting for charles?" carlos asked. "i uh, not really. i was just, hanging out here for a while." y/n replied as she just looked around, looking for some familiar faces but failed. "oh, do you want to join me to the hospitality then?" carlos asked and y/n nodded her head yes. "i would love to!" y/n replied smiling, finally a friend to hang out with. "so were you enjoy the race?" carlos asked as they walked side by side with people surrounding keep patting carlos here and there. y/n nodded her head yes. "yea, usually my father came along with me but since i came here all alone, i realized how enjoyable a race can be." y/n replied, making carlos smiled at y/n's response. "your father?" "oh, he's beau thomas. one of your team's sponsorships?" carlos think of the name for awhile and it hits him. "oh so you're amélie thomas?" y/n chuckled at carlos' question and nodded her head yes.

"yes i am but please, just call me amélie."

"got that."

both carlos and y/n started to walk their way to the ferrari's hospitality until they heard a voice calling for carlos. carlos and y/n turned around and saw charles walking towards their way. "mate, fred was calling for you." charles informed as carlos looked confuse. "ah right, be right back amélie." carlos told y/n. y/n smiles at carlos and nodded her head yes. "okay, i'll be waiting." y/n replied and carlos left y/n and charles standing where y/n and carlos stopped after charles stopped them.

y/n looked at charles, at the same time charles turned his head to y/n's way which makes their eyes met. y/n looked away with a tint of blush started to show upon her apple sized cheeks as she could feel immediate heat within her body. same goes to charles as he looked away as well. "where were you and carlos going to?" charles asked as he was scratching the back of his head. "it's uh, to the hospitality." y/n stammered. and she couldn't even believe that she was stammering. ever since a child, she never stammers. even as a baby.

"uh shall we?" charles asked and y/n nodded her head yes, as charles leads the way. "you know, you seem different than the last time i met you." charles told her, making y/n looked at charles. "maybe because, that wasn't the real me." y/n replied and charles looked confuse at her response. "then what is the real you?" charles asked.

"you will know about it sooner or later."

after the free practice 1, y/n off to the office since they will be having a meeting regarding the auction party.

"uh miss thomas?" a french accented lady called as she entered the office room. y/n looked up and saw one of marie's assistant in monte carlo, bringing in a package in her hands. "what is that janice?" y/n asked while janice entered the room and placed the package on her table. "it was sent by miss marie herself regarding the auction party." janice replied. y/n nodded her head yes. janice excused herself and went out of the room.

y/n took the package and opened it. she looked at a box of jewelry. she took the box out of the package box and placed it on her table. "knock, knock~" it was grace. y/n looked up and motioned grace to come in. "so.. since you will be going to the race for another two days, is there any you know, cute guys?" grace asked as she took a seat infront of y/n. y/n looked at grace weirdly and chuckled. "if there is a cute guy, he probably taken already miss martin." y/n informed her, making grace slumped in the seat, pouting. "you know, it is not every day you get to see guys sitting in weirdly designed car, cruising in circles for god knows how long it takes." once again, y/n chuckled at grace's remarks, she just know what to say i guess, y/n thought.

"maybe if you are lucky, i'll take you there for you to see yourself yeah?" y/n said. grace glanced at the jewelry box on the table. y/n also looked at it and sighed. "sent by marie." grace took it in her hands and opened it. her face seemed brighten up, same goes with her eyes. "oh my lord, this is so beautiful." grace said as she admired it. grace took it out and placed it around her neck. "do i look expensive?" grace asked as she blinked her eyes, making y/n giggled at her antics. "you do madam." y/n replied in her fancy, high class voice that she copied from movies she watched. y/n's office phone rang and she picked it up. "hello, this is y/n thomas." y/n answered.

"heyya sis!" y/n recognized the voice and smiled. "noah!" y/n exclaimed and it was a cue for grace to went out of the room office, silently.

"so i heard you're not in monte carlo, ames." noah said as he entered in the hotel room that amélie residing in. "well, tadaa. congrates genius." amélie said, sitting on her hotel couch. "why are you here anyway, to tell me off?" amélie asked as her eyebrow rose at noah's way. noah sighed and sat next to amélie, wrapping his right arm around amélie's shoulders. amélie leaned her head on noah's shoulder. "you know who i saw on tv isn't you right?" noah questioned, making amélie chuckled. "of course you do, you're noah. the only one who could differrentiate us aside from mum." amélie said. "what were you thinking?" amélie sighed, staring at noah's face. "i want to be free, i want to go on adventures like you and y/n." amélie told him.

all her life, amélie has been the child that their father doted, more specifically, the child that most likely to inherite the company. maybe because of how she's the only one that have french names, or maybe because she's the only one who stayed and bonded with marie and accepting her. nevertheless, amélie's the only one who most likely to permenantly stay in nice.

noah brushed amélie's head and kissed on top of it. "you know that you could always ask father for a break, i mean, how long do you want to pull the good, obedient child act?" noah asked, and amélie pulled away from noah. she sighed. "you don't understand noah." amélie said, looking at him all serious. "mind telling me that?" noah wondered. amélie keep her lip tighten which making noah laughed at her antics. some old habits don't die, thought noah. "well then, how long are you going to stay in here?" noah asked.

"why?"

"well since i am on my break for two months, how about you and me going for an adventure of your life?"

"amélie!" y/n turned around and saw carlos calling and waving his arm at her way. y/n smiled at carlos' way. "hey you." y/n said as they hugged friendly. "it's qualifying day eh, are you nervous?" y/n asked right after they pulled out of the hug. carlos made a confuse face at y/n which makes her laughs and then carlos shook his head no. "not really, i am confident." carlos replied, which makes y/n snorted at carlos' response. carlos giggled at y/n's reaction which could cause a misunderstanding if they don't know what these two were talking about.

for example, charles leclerc.

who has been watching from the ferrari's hospitality as he was about to enter the garage where he bumped into pierre, who asked him who's the girl that carlos talked to. charles rolled his eyes around, which confused pierre, luckily saved by one of alpine's engineers called him for a briefing for free practice 3 before qualifying starts later on.

charles couldn't get his mind out of his head regarding what was carlos said to y/n that made her laughed so genuinely. last year, she was so cold to him that made him had a bad first impression of her in france but now, she was so, nice and felt like an angel has came down from heaven as he could imagine a halo shining bright on top of her head, alongside a pair of angel's wings behind her, which was so bright in white that could blinding him because it was so big for a pair of wings. not realizing that he found her such a beautiful lady that he couldn't wait to show to his maman and brothers. wait, charles shooked his head no and saw that y/n was looking at him.

y/n, who has been eyeing charles while talking to carlos, thinking to herself that what was charles thinking that made him so .. beautiful even if he was daydreaming. "you want to go to the hospitality?" carlos asked which made y/n looked at him back, nodding her head yes. "sure, let's go shall we?" y/n asked and they both started to walk to the ferrari's hospitality which caused charles panicking where he stood up and left the premise. both carlos and y/n confused by charles' attitude, which the engineers also confused by charles, just let him be thinking he might want to go to the toilet in the last minute before practice started.

"hey mum, how are you doing?" noah asked as he and amélie kneeled down at the grave of irene thomas, the children's mum. irene's grave is placed in america, since there was where she came from, also her family wants her to be here instead of wasting money to visit her grave. "after all these years, i still miss you mum, we all do." amélie added, as sniffles started to came out. even if years passed by, it felt like it was yesterday these children find comfort in irene's warm hugs and how her scent was their favourite scent in this world.

and why marie herself can be a mother but never a mum to them.

"who is there?!" both noah and amélie turned around and saw an old man, who is angry at them. both of them were confused with this man. "this is our mum's grave and we're her children." noah said calmly. the old man looked confuse, dropping down things in paper bags that was in his arms. "you're irene's children?" the old man asked. amélie looked at noah and vice versa, noah looked back at the old man. "who are you to our mum sir?" noah asked, tried to be rational as he never seen this man with his mum before.

"i'm her dad."

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