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return-of-a-space-cowboy · 3 years

Note

Yandere halloween ask yandere mad scientist! Bruno uses mind control chip to get darling to be the perfect spouse?

This ask right here made my mouth froth, I love Stepford wives so this ask just rolled along perfectly. Anyway enjoy!

This love

(Yandere mad scientist Bruno X female reader)

You had always thought so highly of Dr Buccirati, you were his apprentice after all but there were times that you thought he just went a little too far with his work and this was one of them.

As he explained to you about how he made a chip that could modify an animal's behaviour. How the chip was planted in the rat's brain that you were holding.

"See (Y/n), look at how tame she is now" he said as he petted the poor creature's head.

"What do you intend to do with what you have learnt?" You asked with anger in your words.

"I intend to have the chip used to help with the conservation of the many animals that are close to being extinct. The animals will have the procedure and be put into captivity, they'll have no more issues with stress or aggressive behaviours which allows for them to be safely cared for and less risk during the reproduction cycle" he explained.

"So what you are saying is that you're going to be suppressing their natural survival instincts so they become domesticated?" You asked with a bitter taste on your tongue.

"That's exactly it, they'll have a safe place to repopulate and have nothing to worry about" he answered as he expressed his delight but it only made you grit your teeth in anger.

"I'm disgusted by what you are doing! You're essentially performing a lobotomy on these poor animals! You're playing god and taking away the emotions of a living creature!" You yelled at him.

"I've helped you work on some crazy things before… but I cross the line here!" You continued as you put the rat down in her cage before folding your arms at Bruno.

"Come on (y/n), you're overreacting… what I'm, no what we are working on is going to change history. So many species will be saved from becoming extinct. we will be two of the greatest scientific minds the world has ever know" he held your shoulder and lightly massaged it as he tried to convince you that there was no wrong in it.

"I don't know why you insist that this is a joint effort but I don't want anything to do with it, if people figure out how it works then it won't be long before this is used on humans… how many corrupt governments do you think would love to have this kind of technology used on their own people?" You rebuttal.

you glared at Bruno as you could see his usually calm demeanor wearing thin. He had his hands gripping his short black locks.

"(Y/n) the truth is that I love you, more than I could love anyone else. I want you to be by my side and I want you to be my equal…" he as his grip on you grew tighter.

"You are so intelligent and so beautiful… I just want you to do your best" he continued.

You pulled away the male with a shocked expression plastered on your face.

"Bruno… I didn't know you felt that way about me but I'm afraid I don't share the same feelings, I just don't think the chemistry is there between us" you told him before you headed to your bedroom.

🧪🧪🧪

You had decided you needed to cut ties from Bruno and finally begin your own work. You don't think anything could keep you working with him now. You began to pack your clothes back into your suitcase.

"(Y/n) are you planning on leaving now?" He asked as he rested himself against the door frame, he seemed to have recollected himself but to you something was off about his almost carefree tone.

"I intend to leave tomorrow" you said as you sat on your bed and folded your clothing.

"Don't you think you're blowing this out of proportion, can't we put the breaks on just talk about this over some tea..." he said as he slowly drew closer to you.

"I understand that you're upset and I didn't make things much better" he continued calmly before violently grabbing your hand causing you to fall back onto the bed before you heard a metallic click. You screamed as you tried to pull your hand back to find it was handcuffed to the head of the bed.

"What the hell?!" You screamed at Bruno who was now on top of you.

"I'm sorry that it had to come to this but I can't let you leave" he said.

"I love you too much to let you go… you're too good for this world" he continued.

You felt your stomach twist horribly and your vocal cords seize up. Your eyes were wide with horror.

"I dealt with my unrequited love for so long, I tried to just to put my feelings aside for you but I feel like if I keep it up any longer I'll explode" he rambled you tried to push him with your free hand but he was quick to hold it down.

🧪🧪🧪

It had been a month since he'd locked you up. You were curled up with your knees to your chest, you could see every little mark he'd ever left on your body, you still felt the sting that each love bite left on your skin. Today was cold and the chain and cuff around your ankle made it worse as you shivered in a silk nightgown.

You flinched as you heard the front door open. You had hoped that maybe that was anyone but Bruno, someone that could free you from this place. You heard a pair of footsteps draw closer, your hope dying as the same pattern tore into your brain… you knew he was home.

"(Y/n) I'm home" his voice was cheerful as he opened the door.

"I'm sorry I was later than usual… I found so many things I thought you'd like" he explained as he walked in with a large bag in his hand before placing it on the bed. You were hesitant to look but his sapphire eyes stared at you in anticipation, making your skin crawl.

You grabbed the bag and the first thing you pulled out was a 50s style white and black polka dotted dress. You looked at Bruno with a forced smile on your face.

"Bruno this is really nice but I've never really been a fan of dresses" you told him. He didn't respond. You pulled out another similar dress before picking out various boxes with golden jewelry till there was one more box inside, however it was rectangular in shape unlike the others. You pulled it out only to gasp in horror as you gazed upon the packaging of a pregnancy test. You looked back at him.

At this point you knew something was wrong, your stomach was telling you.

"What's going on?" You asked him with shakey words.

"I just need you to take it" he responded.

"Why?"

"I need to know whether or not you're pregnant, it's urgent"

"Urgent, what's urgent?!" You yelled at him.

"You're being extremely vague, it's scaring me" you replied, unsure of what was so urgant. You really hoped you weren't, having to live knowing your child was of his blood.

"Just take it please, wouldn't you like to know as well?" He begged.

You had a bad feeling about this but if you knew now then you could try to do something about it if it did come back positive. You let out a defeated sigh as you unboxed the test.

"See you didn't need to make such a big deal about it dear" he said in a light hearted tone as he walked towards the bed and unlocked the shackle on your leg and allowed you to go to the bathroom.

You felt the relief wash over you as you saw the results. It was negative, perhaps you were getting yourself all worked up.

"(Y/n) dearest, what's the results?" Bruno asked from outside the bathroom door. You opened it and showed him, his eyes lit up with joy as he hugged you which was very odd indeed, you assumed he'd had baby fever… if that was the case shouldn't he be disappointed.

You recoiled as you felt a sharp jab on the inner side of your elbow. You saw the now empty syringe in his hand.

"What are you doing?!" You screamed as you stumbled back from his grasp. He looked at the syringe and let out a content hum before his eyes returned to you.

He contemplated on whether he should tell you or not but at this point you couldn't do anything to stop him so there was no point in hiding it.

"I remember back on the night you tried to leave fondly, in hindsight you gave me the most brilliant idea" he explained.

"That whole talk on how my chip could work on humans was really inspiring, so I'm going to do just that… if you won't love me like this, then I can just make you love me" he continued as a smile grew on his lips.

The shock hit you as he explained it all, it horrified you to imagine it. It shook you to the very core. Everything else seemed like a luxury in comparison to losing everything.

"Bruno, please don't do this! I love you so much!" You screamed as you draped your body over him.

"My dear I love you so much… I'll stay with you forever… I'll give you as many children as you want, please oh please don't do this!" You were practically sobbing as you tried to pull on his strings.

"I'll do anything for you, anything at all!" You continued as you felt everything becoming numb, he had you in his hands and he could do anything he wanted to you.

"Please Bruno, we can put this all behind us and start over… you never imprisoned me, you never did those things to me… we can be the happiest couple!" You pleaded to him as your eyelids grow heavy.

"Please… please… I won't be the same person you feel in love with if you do this…" your screams turned into a mutter and as you tried to fight off the deep abyss of unconsciousness you swore you could see a glimpse of your whole life with every slow blink.

🧪🧪🧪

"What you've made is amazing Bruno, you should be proud of your work" the man in front of Bruno complimented his work.

"Thank you sir, to be honest I wouldn't be here showing you this if it wasn't for my wonderful wife" he said as he beamed with joy.

"Oh, your wife must be an amazing woman to help you" the man replied.

"Yes she is. She always gave me the right idea when I was unsure, she'd be here with us right now if it weren't for the upcoming baby. She's just been so ecstatic about it since we found out" he stated as he had his head in his hand. He was over the moon with joy, he couldn't talk to someone without bringing up the fact that he was going to be a father soon.

"Oh congratulations, how long till it's due?" The male congratulated him.

"Oh it's close, we're expecting around October… It's hard to imagine that I'll be a father in two months"

"And how's the lucky lady feeling about this? My wife was pretty worried before our first" he asked.

"Oh she's been great, she's been taking it all in stride. I haven't seen her sick or having any mood swings like what most of us tend to expect" Bruno chuckled as he slumped back into his chair.

"We should probably get back on topic… I should probably explain how these chips work in detail"

#yandere jjba #yandere jojo's bizarre adventure #yandere x reader #yandere bruno #bruno x reader #halloween au

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mggpleasedontlookhere · 3 years

Text

liar liar pt. 2

request: I have a request, the reader is dating Spencer, and she and JJ are the ones that know that Emily faked her death. I’m thinking of it taking place in “It Takes A Village,” and she has to deal with Spencer being upset with her, like he was with JJ, but it has a fluff ending? Thanks!

for: @flklrevrmre

word count: 2,192 reading time approx: 9 mins

a/n: i hope you enjoy this ending ;) and i’m elated to have so many new friends on my taglist.

masterlist

pt. 1

My ring finger traced the circumference of the wine glass I was drinking out of, while my eyes followed the marble trails of Rossi’s countertop. The team was giggling and chatting amongst themselves as I secluded myself. My thoughts were captured by my insecurities, paralyzing every fun bone I had in my body. Occasionally, I would contribute to their conversations, but only enough that I didn’t make myself seem bereaved.

After a while, it became apparent that I wasn’t participating in the festivities, which conjured Emily and JJ to step away from the group, joining me. “Hey…” JJ eased into small talk, stuffing her hands into her pocket as she approached me. I replied with a light smile, their presence uplifting my current state.

I knew what they wanted to say. I knew what they were going to ask.

Spencer.

“How are you holding up Y/N?” Emily hesitantly brought herself into the conversation. They both gazed at me with doe eyes, tenderness evident in their touch as they resided beside me.

I took my lip in between my teeth, shaking my head as the fatigue had finally caught up to me. My chest throbbed from being sore all week, my shoulders were frail from being uneasy all the time, and my heart burned with self-reproach. With every passing day, I felt my limbs grow limp and my soul go numb. In contradiction, the two halves of my brain battled one another till my doubts were left to torment me further.

With the silent response, JJ and Emily shared glances of disquietude, pondering their next steps. “Y/N?” JJ called out softly, laying a tender hand on top of mine. “You took a burden alone. That doesn’t mean you have to go through it alone,” she murmured, nodding to Emily.

“Y/N, I can’t help but feel like this is my fault,” Emily lamented. “I just...tell me that there’s a way I can help.”

“There’s nothing either of you can do…” I smiled bitterly, glancing at both of them. I squeezed JJ’s hand, feeling a film cast over my eyes. “And Emily, you had to protect Declan,” I empathize, using my other hand to pull her into a side hug. “I would’ve done the same.”

“I can tell,” Emily looked at me with somber reverence. “Especially for what you did for Spence.”

Another pang hit the center of my chest, making my ribcage sting. The mention of his name made my skin crawl instead of making my heart flutter like it used to. I wordlessly winced at Emily’s notice, trying to conceal it the best I can. “And I would do it again,” I declared, meaning every word. “I’d burn the entire world if it meant making sure that he isn’t alone. I...I know what it feels like to be confined in your head--it’s something me and him share. It’s a merciless place.”

“You really do love him, don’t you?”

“More than I can ever fathom.”

I stared at the ceiling, letting my tears travel back inside of my head. I shut my eyes, feeling a deep burn envelop my eyelids from all the crying I’ve done previously. “I spoke to him,” Emily brought up.

My attention instantly shifted to her, prompting her to elaborate. “I spoke to him when we wrapped up that case in New York,” she explained. I unknowingly leaned over, listening intently to her story. “We had a conversation about everything--you. I won’t get into details because that’s between you and Spencer, but I did encourage him to come tonight.”

My nerves did small somersaults, unable to process the new piece of information. “Are you sure?” I falteringly asked.

“I’m sure he’ll come.”

But he didn’t.

A few hours had passed, and there was no evidence of Spencer’s attendance. With another disappointment, the burden of my thoughts pried at my most vulnerable parts.

I had enough.

I rose from my seat, bidding everyone adieu as I excused myself to the backyard. Amid the formalities, I assured everyone of my well-being and that I would return soon. Their persistent objections were loud, loud enough to stifle the opening of the front door as I stepped outside.

I felt the cool air caress my shoulders while crickets chirped a nightly symphony. The moon glowed with elegance, and stars painted the sky in an ethereal light. From a distance, it looked as if the planets were mere neighbors greeting one another.

It was beautiful; it took me out of the confines of my mind.

Chatter can still be heard in the background, but somehow it blended nicely with the lively sounds of night creatures. Although what I didn’t realize was the thump of approaching footsteps behind me.

“Hey,” muttered a hushed voice.

The instant I recognized the presence, my entire body stiffened. The inside lights cast a shadow on the wooden porch I sat on, displaying a lanky silhouette on the ground. I couldn’t bring myself to move, let alone speak. My tongue was pierced against the roof of my mouth, petrified to unpack the situation at hand.

He responded to my silence with a reluctant step towards me. Even in our circumstances, I can still feel his presence lingering on the soft skin of my back, making the little hairs stand. Our proximity was slowly closing in with every soft thud until he was eventually situated next to me.

I unconsciously looked over my shoulder, opposite of him, to avoid his curious stare. I shut my eyes, isolating myself in my mind in the hopes that this was a dream. But the frequent trembles of my stomach told me otherwise.

“Y/N?” he called out delicately. “Y/N...please,” he attempted to brush my hand with his fingers, but by instinct, I retracted them with swiftness. A bolt of electricity shot up my arm from Spencer’s touch, a cruel remeberance of the fervor we used to share. My fingertips shivered at the loss of contact, but the static sensation remained.

“Y/N, I know that you probably don’t want to talk to me--and you have every right to…” he babbled. “...but I just--please just listen to me.”

But I refused, every word that fell from his supple lips made the echo in my head boisterous.

I was a mistake.

I bit the inside of my cheek, feeling my abdomen clench in misery. The sensation traveled deep into my chest, pulling me in different directions. My throat cinched up, and the coldness wandered all over my body. Every muscle in me cried out in anguish, unable to persevere through the exhaustion that I’ve let consume me.

“Y/N-”

“Please just go…” I whispered, choking on the aching sobs rising in my esophagus.

“I’ll leave...I promise,” he muttered in a pained voice. “But just...please, let me say this.”

Newfound tears threatened to spill over my eyes, the sorrow in his voice creating a void in me. With the little compassion I had left, I turned around facing his direction. Although I didn’t dare to acknowledge his gaze, instead, I settled my attention on the wood below.

“I know that it’s hard to get through to me, and I know I get stuck in my head,” he began, lowering his head. “You and I both know how hopeless it gets being alone there.”

He twiddled his fingers as he spoke, an implication of his distress. An infinitesimal part of me still yearned to comfort the man, to ease his worries away, but I didn’t have to courage to do so.

“When I get into that space, I get...I get frightened by the doubts that my mind conjures up,” he admits. “Everyone looks at me as the genius--the expectation given to me. But, only you and JJ look at me for who I am instead of who I must be for the team.”

His voice started to crack in between his words, his deliverance laced with dejection and bitterness. I rang my fingers over the textured floorboards, distracting myself from the swelling ache in my heart.

“But you Y/N…” he whispered, gazing at me with a rueful adoration. “You alone bring so much light into the obscurity of my mind. You...you make all my pains go away with nothing but a glance of your smile, ” he chuckled pitifully. “Y/N, you-”

“You told me I was mistake…” I croaked, ignoring the sharp twinge in my throat.

I finally met his gaze with a weary expression. His hair was slightly disheveled, and the bags encompassing his eyes were prominent. But it was the torment evident in them that was the most striking. His irises failed to gleam of their usual autumn hazel, and the golden specks scattered across the tender hue were dull.

“I...I know,” he struggled to admit. “But, I was wrong-”

“You...you told me I was your biggest mistake,” I reiterated, my voice coming off shaky and unstable. “Reid, you…” I paused, my pitch elevating as a whimper loomed to escape my lips. “You hurt me...so much, Reid.”

I scoffed, my vision going blurry from impending tears. Spencer hung his head in remorse, combing his hand through his curls as he attempted to keep his composure. An uneasy silence ensued that not even the blissful sounds of wildlife can mask the tautness in the air.

“I...I know,” he muttered quietly. “JJ, she told me the truth after our...after what happened at the station during the case,” he confessed. “You did all that...you took all the blame, just, so I had someone to be there with me.”

I sighed, shutting my eyes at his admission. “I didn’t...I couldn’t bear the thought of you going through it alone,” I affirmed.

“But you…” Spencer paused, shaking his head at himself. “You...did it all alone.”

All of my guards fell at the utterance of his words. My heart throbbed, and my chest ultimately gave out. Suppressed sobs wracked my entire being, slipping past my tired lips with ease. My head felt faint, and my shoulders slumped. Agony coursed throughout my body, feeling it prick every inch of my skin.

Spencer shifted next to me in an instant, engulfing me in his arms. There I wailed and cried every tear that was humanly possible. I set free the entrapped painful sentiments I’ve burrowed under my stubbornness, and I let the numbness drift out of my body. All that was left was the carcass of my grief and an apprehensive heart.

“I’m sorry Y/N...I’m so sorry,” Spencer repeated, cradling me back and forth while he tried to mask his whimpers.

For most of the night, we stayed in each other’s embrace as the moonlight graced our figures. My face was delved into the cleft of his neck, and his chin laid snugly on my head. The rise and fall of my chest was still erratic, but it was in a much healthier state than before. Our combined breathing was the only distinguishable sound floating in the air after we had steadied ourselves.

The party inside was subdued, and the chatter was nonexistent. The lights were still on, but it seemed that the team had moved elsewhere to celebrate their festivities. Before long, the quiet around us ceased as Spencer broke the silence.

“Y/N?” Spencer whispered.

I nudged my face further into his neck, prompting him to continue.

“What I said...the horrible things that I told you, you have to know that they’re not true,” he lamented, taking my balled-up fists into his palms. “Y/N, you’re far from a mistake. The biggest mistake I’ve made to date is making you believe that,” he croaked.

“Spencer...what you did-”

“Wait--just--let me finish,” he nodded, playing with my hands. “Y/N, you bring color into what I see...yo-you bring color into everything that I do,” he professed, stumbling over his words. “You make it easy to wake up every day and do what we need to do because I know I get to wake up next to you.”

His lips began to tremble, and his hands began to shake. Instinctively, I cupped his hands and brought them close to my chest.

“I…I love you...so much, Y/N,” he whimpered. “And I hate myself for making you feel like you were comparable to anyone else, or that you were insignificant.”

I pressed small kisses to his knuckles, knowing that it would calm him down. I felt a pang hit my torso in Spencer’s discomfort, igniting the part of me that longed to console him. I observed the collapse of his stature and the decomposed state of his demeanor, his appearance visibly in plight.

“Truth be told, Y/N. You are the most significant thing in my life…” he whispered. “You make me whole.”

As he finished his declaration, tears welled up in both our eyes for the last time. “Spence…” I breathed, basking in the warmth that his eyes radiated, despite his desperation.

“Loving you...is one of the greatest thing I will ever do.”

taglist: @rexorangecouny @howdycharlie @honeymilk-4 @linthebinbag @andreasworlsboring101 @ssareidbby @kyleetheeditor @tclaerh @jimilogy @lulwaxim @jhillio @m3ssytrash @haylaansmi @meowiemari @ashwarren32 @spencerwaltergubler

‘liar liar’ taglist: @lieswithoutfairytales @foreveryoungxx3 @goldentournesol @l0ve-0f-my-life @kenny-0909 @andiebeaword @hercleverboy

tags that don’t work: @crazymar15 @nighttimerain123

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ot5ismyhome · 3 years

Text

2. Falling

To read from the beginning click here.

*****

Wanda woke up from her sleep screaming. She looked around her trying to figure out where she was. Slowly the reality set in. She cradled her head on her knees and started crying. She had dreamed of Pietro dying again. The pain was raw and powerful. Every time the pain felt like it was the first time. Every night she dreams of him dying in different ways. But always one thing was the same. She would be standing a few feet away. Not able to do anything. Useless. Her bedroom door opened and Steve walked in. He would always come when she woke up screaming. He sat near her and put an arm around her. She leaned into his touch on instinct. He held her as she cried. He never asked any questions. She sobbed uncontrollably till her eyes ran dry. She wanted to spend the whole day curled up in bed. She didn’t want to do anything.

Wanda had lost the will to care about many things in her life. Throughout her life, she and Pietro had been together. It had always been them against the world. Now she stands alone. She didn’t know who she was. They had always been ‘we’ and now suddenly she lost it. She felt she never knew the meaning of ‘I’. She didn’t know how to process that. She didn’t know how to accept that. She had lost a part of herself and nothing could make her whole again. She desperately wished for a second chance. If she could only travel back in time. Or if only this was a nightmare, she would wake up any minute now.

The passing of time didn’t bring any solace to Wanda’s situation. It’s been a month and there was no end to nightmares. Her abandoned phone lying on the night table caught her attention. She plugged into charge and switched it on. As soon as she opened her, the wallpaper of her and her brother filled the screen. She went through the gallery. It was filled with photos of her and Pietro. She couldn’t believe how much her life had changed. She, Pietro and Thompson regularly visited various bars. She lingered over the photo taken at Steve’s party. Her eyes started stinging. She kept scrolling and stopped at the photo they had taken two years back on their birthday. The twins had thrown a small party and invited their friends to Jupiter Disco. Something struck inside her as she pulled on a simple outfit and made her way out into the city. The cold evening wind stroked her bare face adding a red blush to her cheeks and neck.

Wanda entered the bar and looked around. She had no idea what made her do it but she went along. She perched on the bar stool and ordered a drink. She ordered drinks after drinks and drowned it. She didn’t know how much she had been drinking but the alcohol wasn’t bringing any solace. She wanted to relive the happy memories but her alcohol meddled brain felt numb. She wanted to feel Pietro’s presence. She wanted to be engulfed in his hug and feel safe. She wanted to hold him back and protect him. Her eyes started watering; she pressed back her tears and drowned her drink. When the bartender cut off her drink and replaced it with water, she wanted to shout at him. She got up from her bar stool but stumbled down.

Wanda woke up the next day, her head throbbing in pain. She saw a jug of water by her bedside table. She poured herself a glass and drowned it. She swallowed an aspirin with water. She made her way to the living room. It was deserted. Steve would have left for the company she thought. She went into the kitchen. She wanted to resist it but huger overcame her. She hadn’t eaten well for the past week. She went through the fridge looking for something to eat. She saw a sticky note saying ‘Breakfast. Please eat’ on the top of a covered bowl. Wanda opened it to see berry salad. She devoured the food, not minding to chew.

Having no memory of the previous night didn’t bother her much like it should have. She spent the day lounging on the couch flipping through various channels not interested in anything. She fell asleep on the couch only to wake up in the late evening. The house was plunged into darkness. She didn’t mind turning on the light as she went to her room. She pulled the first dress she could reach from her closet and changed. She locked the door on the way out and went to Jupiter Disco again.

…..

Steve smelled the alcohol as soon as he entered the house. He found Wanda crying in Pietro’s room, hugging his shirt. He thought to talk to her about her new addiction to prevent it from growing but seeing the broken trembling figure in front of him he couldn’t bring himself. He was glad that she had found her way home instead of passing out in the bar like the day before. His heart pained when he saw Wanda in that state. He decided to talk to her the next day. But Steve became caught up in work in his office and was spending less time with Wanda. Her trips to the bar continued as she paid no heed to his words.

Steve got a call to pick up Wanda from the same bar. This time she was conscious and waiting for him. Seeing him she stumbled towards him, but was steadied by the woman next to her. She had blonde hair and a strand was coloured purple. Her eyes shone bright, showing that she was sober. She steadied Wanda and helped her walk.

“Steeeeeve, you came” Wanda drawled.

“Yeah, kid. Now let’s get in the car. Let’s go home” he said softly. He turned to the new woman and offered her thanks. He opened the door to the passenger seat to let Wanda in. As she was going to step in, she was stopped by the other woman.

Steve looked at her quizzically, trying to understand what is happening.

“I could only let her go, if you prove you’re her friend” she said sternly.

Steve took out his licence and extended it towards the woman. “You can check her phone; I will be in her emergency contacts” he offered.

The woman gave a nod and returned it. “I know. I was the one who called. Just wanted to make sure, she will be okay.”

Steve gave a small nod as he helped Wanda into the car. Wanda was almost passed out when he tried to talk, so he let it slide again. It had been about three months since Pietro’s death. Wanda was falling into the pit of alcoholism and Steve wasn’t able to stop her. It pained him to see her waste her life away. He had tried to talk to her multiple times about therapy but she always shuts him down.

…..

As Steve came out of the café with Bucky, he can’t help but feel a pang of jealousy.

After parting ways with Bucky in the café, Steve drove home. On his way he got a message from Koenig that the manager of Jupiter Disco called. Steve arrived at the bar to see Wanted sitting in the side walk staring into the distance. The security was eyeing her warily. Seeing Steve, she jumped to her feet but lost her balance and collapsed down. She started laughing and didn’t try to move from the road. He quickly picked her up and supported her.

The manager came out and walked directly to Steve.

“Mr. Roger, I didn’t expect you to come in person,” he said sounding surprised.

“What’s the issue?”

The manager filled in on the happening. When the bartender had cut off her alcohol, Wanda had put on a fight. She had tried to punch him and grab the bottle from his hand. They had called the security to escort her out. Having discovered, she worked at The Roger’s Innovative, the manager had decided to give Steve a call before involving the police.

Steve’s anger grew with each passing second. He couldn’t believe that Wanda had gone to this extent and he partly blamed himself. He said to the manager that he will handle the situation. As soon as they got in the car, he wanted to shout at her instead he bit his tongue. He waited a few minutes to calm down.

“Wanda” he called her. His voice was neutral showing no emotion.

Wanda ignored him staring out of the window.

“Please don’t ignore me. I want you to listen to me” he said a bit firmly. She turned to look at him. Her eyes showed she was indifferent to his words.

Steve tried to push his luck to make her see the mess she was right now. He tried to talk sense into her but it was to no avail. She ignored him other than the occasional glances she threw in his direction. When they arrived at her apartment, she got out and quickly made her way upstairs. Steve wasn’t ready to give up so he followed her.

“Are you going to respond something?” he asked as he closed the apartment door. He tried to hide the annoyance in his words but it was slowly creeping in.

Wanda who had been silent the whole ride, broke down. She let her anger get the better of her. His pestering throughout the ride had been annoying enough. She hoped he would leave her alone once they arrived at her home.

“WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO SAY? I DON’T THINK THERE IS ANYTHING TO TALK STEVE. YOU ASKED TO GO OUT AND LIVE MY LIFE. I AM DOING THAT. I AM HAVING FUN. IF YOU WANT TO STOP ME YOU CAN AS WELL TRY BUT I AM NOT LISTENING TO YOU”

“I’m telling you for your own good. You need therapy.”

“MY OWN GOOD? DON’T YOU FUCKING ACT LIKE YOU CARE ABOUT ME. I’M NOT READY TO ACCEPT THAT LIE FOR EVEN FOR ONE MORE SECOND. YOU DON’T CARE ABOUT ME. YOU DIDN’T CARE ABOUT PIETRO. YOU NEVER CARED ABOUT US. IF YOU HAD CARED ENOUGH YOU WOULDN’T HAVE LET HIM DIE. HE DIED BECAUSE HE TRIED TO SAVE YOU. IT WAS YOU WHO SHOULD BE DEAD. NOT HIM. Not him” she whispered the last part again as she sank to her knees.

Every word out of Wanda’s mouth stung Steve like million needles striking his body at once. He would be lying if he hadn’t blamed himself for Pietro’s death. He had come to accept that it was out of his control and he wasn’t responsible for the kid’s death. But her words still hurt him.

Steve softly rested his hand on her shoulder to console her.

“Don't,” she said curtly, jerking away. She got up and went to Pietro’s room and locked herself in. Steve decided to not follow her and give her some space.

*****

Chapter 3

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symphonyofthewrite · 4 years

Text

If These Walls Could Talk (Ch5)

Fandom: Castlevania Netflix

Summary: Vampires do not have reflections, and castles do not have hearts. But Dracula is no ordinary vampire, and Castlevania is no ordinary castle. If castles can fight, maybe they can think too.

The series, and Adrian’s childhood, told from the perspective of the castle.

Notes: FYI for anyone who’s been following the story here ( @symphonyofthewrite ) this is currently the most recent chapter!!

A HUGE thank you if you have, by the way!!!! 😘

If you can comment and/or reblog as well that would make my week!!!

Chapter Summary: “You really don’t understand the act of forging. He’s not dead. We make life from death here.” “And you make soldiers for Dracula, which is one reason why he invests so much in you despite your…humanity. …Dracula brought us all here to fight his war, Hector. All the vampires under his reign.” “The war. Not his war.” “…Hector do you think this war is going well?” “We’re hardly losing.” “No, of course not. But it seems chaotic, undirected, as if we were lashing out at humanity without any real plan beyond wild destruction.” “I think wild destruction is what he wants.” * “Are you still my friend?” “Always.” “Then know that you may be alone.”

Chapter 5: “War”

The Castle does not like these guests Dracula has let in.

It knows many of them; has housed a number of them before. But that was before. Before the Life. Before the Light. And it no longer likes the death and the dark. It no longer likes the way these guests squabble, and talk of death and war as if it’s not at their beck and call. It feels like it’s infested with bedbugs, bitten a hundred times in its place of rest, itchy till it can’t fall asleep anymore.

The war room is always the most jittery and loud, housing the war its named after.

They have brought their war with them. The Castle must and will fight Dracula’s war, but only Dracula’s war. Dracula may think they fight his war. But the war they bring is their own, more insidious, having its own branches, trying to choke out its master’s goals. There is descent. Secrets fluttering on silver tongues, like moths in the halls, congregating around any light here. Viruses, lies contaminating its walls. Betrayal against its master, who was gracious enough to invite them in.

Its master wonders to the walls who his friends are—as well he should, for he has so few—and the Castle wishes in its numb state he never let them in. Why couldn’t he have just stayed with his boy, and let the light reach him?

Godbrand’s voice comprises much of the war in the war room; all thirst, and little to no thought. Very much a vampire, the undeath in him attempting to steal the life of everything he comes into contact with. So human; his words comprised of bloodthirst, fists full of fire.

Camilla’s dagger-sharp footsteps in the halls, the towers, like pinpricks, like tiny little bites. A parasite that wriggled into Castlevania’s heart, attempting to make it beat to her duplicitous rhythm. The queen, who walks in stride with the cold, the death, and the dark that took the Castle so long to grow out of the habit of wearing. They are like a loyal shadow at her heels, clawing at the walls. The Castle liked her once, for the same reason it doesn’t like her now.

She challenges Dracula and all the life he ever managed to find.

There are other vampires too—some with names, others toy soldiers—but they are hardly worth mentioning, for there are little more than smoke and noise, mist and shadow.

…Well, maybe the Castle doesn’t dislike everyone.

Castlevania likes Hector. Likes the sound of Hector hammering the death out of things in its dungeon. It may not be the golden life, it may not be warm or tender, and it may make demons for war, but it is life of a sort. The boy is kind and gentle, and he likes dogs, and sunlight.

It is nice to have dogs and cats scampering and yipping in its halls. Hector is right when he says they are far better than people. Dracula never let Adrian get a dog, and this kind of pure, gentle life is the closest thing to sunlight they can get in this night-shrouded place. In the same token, Castlevania wishes it could bottle up the sunlight and bring it down into the dungeon to him.

Castlevania likes Isaac. Very much in fact. Isaac is loyal to its master, and loyalty is a rare commodity in these infested halls. He may be the only who still has it. And that is a kind of life too. The Castle snatches a smile when it sees the two speaking as friends, glad there is, at least, someone left its master can speak to.

It is because the Castle likes Isaac that it doesn’t like the sound of Isaacs whip. Self-discipline isn’t so bad of a thing…but the Castle knows of pain now. The Castle wouldn’t have cared before, but now it knows what little boys who believe in love deserve; it knows that good masters never whip their servants, their children, or their castles. And ‘doesn’t like’ is not merely a preference now, because the sight of Isaac’s blood…it hurts. But Isaac lived too long in the sun, and now he prefers the cold and the dark. And Death has claimed him for its own, just like it claimed its master, wrapped its strings around him, and he will be a living death though he is still alive. He grew up in the sun, now he belongs in a dark place…but the Castle doesn’t want to be that place anymore.

Maybe Castlevania likes them because Dracula likes them. They’re the only creatures in the Castle Dracula likes; the only two who are human.

The only people he’s ever truly liked are at least half human.

Why can’t he see that he doesn’t hate humans? He just hates bloodthirst.

Godbrand grumbles, he questions, and demands for things that don’t belong to him.

Camilla schemes, and denounces them all as less than livestock.

Hector tries to discern the most humane way to put humanity down.

Isaac beats his back bloody, and he tries to be a friend to Dracula after all.

And Dracula sits in his study and doesn’t smile anymore.

He makes the fire as bright as he can, and no matter how bright and warm the fire is—no matter how much the Castle tries to refine all the light Alucard filled the world with into this one room, fill the emptiness, resurrect the death—it can never warm him. He needs to be held. The Castle cannot do that. Only the boy or his mother could. And they are too far now.

The walls watch him, and wait for him to talk to them again. And the walls, for the first time, wonder—(and hate themselves for wondering)—if the word isn’t undead anymore.

Life was once a part of the undeath, hidden in the corners and crevices…but is death a fact of the unlife now?

There are fights, words and fists, like tumors, like cysts. Unlike the humans who once banged on the Castle’s door for vampire blood, Godbrand takes the vampires out to feast on the wine of human veins. Camilla latches her teeth onto Hector and he becomes host to her lies; the sun-and-dog boy taken in by the parasite, and Castlevania would shout at him not to listen, that she doesn’t have his best interests at heart, to listen to its master still…if only it could talk.

Godbrand dies with a whip around his neck and flames in his chest. The brutality dies at the hand of the boy who believes in love. And the Castle wouldn’t have cared before, but now its complicated. It is glad for a little less noise, but the blood and the death make its stones crawl, and it hates to see it all on the hands of a young man who should have been appalled at such an act. Now its sad, sad for Isaac’s sake. Because he’s just a young man, like Adrian.

Castlevania misses the boy, and the days of sunlight. Prays that he will return, with dancing gold at his heels.

They mentioned Alucard, once. In a way Castlevania hasn’t heard his name spoken before. After all those years of his little feet toddling upon its stones, the sun stinging slowly and quietly; they say his name, like it’s a threat. It’s sound causes unease when they were always so sickeningly confident. He is not a threat, an enemy, within the war, but a threat to the war itself. His name could end this war.

And the Room snatches an inkling of air at the sound of his name, tries to cry out, but only croaks a frail war call—a war call against this war. The Room tries to smile through the pain, because if that’s true it reflects him; he stands against the cold, the dark, and the death, like the Room always did.

Castlevania prays he will stop this war, this dark, this death, this hungry emptiness, and he will save his father. But it is losing hope each curtained sunrise.

The Room, breath stolen from its lungs, unable to cry out, waits. The kind of anticipation as when this new life was going to arrive in the first place, but there is no apprehension this time. The Room was not alive, then, and this is a living waiting. It waits with feeble attempts to remove the claw around its throat, breathless cries upon its ever-silent lips. Waits for its master to come home—for its master is not home, and it is not a home without its master.

The Room waits, and without breath things start to become rather funny.

At first it’s Godbrands remarks, then it’s Carmilla’s schemes. Then its Hector’s pets, and Issac’s unyielding loyalty. The death, the darkness, and the cold, cruel injustice of it all. They should make the Room’s walls boil with anger, and at first they did, but now it wants to laugh instead.

Hypoxia, they call it. When, lacking oxygen, everything is just a little too funny.

The Room is hypoxic.

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i-am-the-gay-shit · 5 years

Text

My only Sun - Chapter 1 ‘1st Encounter’

Already back with another Maylor fanfic... This couple is a sin. And I love it. I wanted to try a story, so here is the first Chapter of ‘My only Sun’! This is a vampire story, don’t worry Brian doesn’t sparkle, and is set in the 60s-70s. I hope ya’ll like it :) There is some kissing, but nothing too sexual! There will also be hints of Deacury later!

Click this link to be directed to the full story

Darkness was all his kind ever knew… It was their curse. A way of punishment for desiring the unnatural. Deep down, he knew this was his fault. He wouldn’t have had this stupid curse if he were smarter… Well… He was smarter now, but what’s done is done. He couldn’t take it back. The burning in his throat. How his teeth ached and body pulsed when that hunger took over. The only nice thing about this curse was his enhanced senses.

Hazel eyes gazed up at the waning moon. He could hear the wind running through the leafs and smelled the burning of gasoline from the nearby town. Closing his eyes and focusing, he could almost see the people talking and running across busy streets. Their fresh blood pumping…

“Brian. There you are! I told you to wait for me by the house.” A slightly annoyed voice pulled Brian from his thoughts.

“Ah, Freddie. Sorry… Just got a bit captivated.” He answers, still staring at the moon. The others footsteps almost move soundlessly.

“It’s quite beautiful tonight. But we must move with a bit more haste if we would like to feed tonight.” Freddie sighs. Noticing how the younger, yet taller man shifted uncomfortably. “Yes, dear. We both hate it, but I’d rather feed than become some mindless zombi. We may be dead but I refuse to look like that.” The older continues, patting Brian’s shoulder.

The younger man knew there was truth to what was said. Though he didn’t enjoy killing others… It was better to have one person die then countless because he didn't want to feed… And he could already feel his teeth ache. The hunger rising quickly.

“Yeah…” He clears his throat. “Lets go…” He says before following his friend.

He had met Freddie about 90 something years ago and they just… stuck together ever since. He knew the man was many years older, having this same curse probably before Brian was even born. But the man still stayed so lively and taught him that everything was okay… Well… He taught Brian almost everything if he was going to be honest. How to zone into different sense, control his strength, control his hunger... everything. He’d probably be dead if it weren’t for Freddie… Well… not dead… but might as well call it death…

“My. This city is much more lively then the last time I strolled through!” He hears Freddie exclaim, so he looks up and is almost blinded by the light of the city. Cars drove down the streets, people walked alongside, stores along every corner… It was not how he remembered his hometown…

“London… It has changed through the years…” Brian admits softly. He couldn’t help but miss his home… Even with the different scenery, London always had this...this… aura… about it… He loved it. He wished he could stay here forever…

“Well, come darlin’. The sun isn’t going to wait for us.” Freddie sighs, latching himself dramatically on the taller man’s arm before pulling him toward a busy pub. “This should do us well, don’t you think?” He says, looking around at all the different people. The smell of alcohol, sweat, drugs, and sex filled Brian’s senses making him cringe his nose. But the smell of the blood under all their skins made his entire being ache.

“Yes… Should be fine.” He agrees before moving away from Freddie and making his way to the bar while Fred moved directly to a crowd of people. That was one big difference about the two men. Freddie liked to dive right it and pick his poison, while Brian liked to sit back and choose from a far. Though, Freddie also had a gift of seduction and boy did he use it.

He watched the way Freddie moved and flirted with everyone. He also noted that the older man had no shirt on under his leather jacket making him roll his eyes. No one could ever change Fred. He was who he was. Brian admired that about the older man and wondered if he would get so old that other people's opinions wouldn’t matter to him.

But it was hard to grow confident when you couldn’t even see your own reflection. Never knowing how you looked or hardly having memories of your own appearance before the change. The only thing he knew for sure was that his hair was unruly, curly, and went to his shoulders. He thinks he remembered Freddie comment how his eyes were hazel. Other than that, he knew nothing about his own face…

“Oy. You gonna buy a drink or just sit around.” Brian turned to a cranky old bartender and offered a polite smile. He could feel the annoyance off the old man.

“Sorry… I’ll take a guinness, please.” He says softly watching the older gentlemans eyes roll before grabbing a cold guinness and popping it open.

“That’d’ll be 5 pounds.” The man practically spits, but Brian doesn’t change his smile. He reaches in his pocket and pays the man before taking the bottle with a small thank you. Looking back, he spots Freddie making out with some guy in the corner.

“Well, he’s making quick work for this…” He comments to himself before looking around the pub. Scanning the people before his senses were engulfed by a strong presence. Looking over to the entrance he saw stunning young man looking around the pub before walking in and leaning against the bar, not far from Brian.

“Hey, Mister. Grab me a Stella Artois.” He had to practically yell to the bartender thanks to the loud music. The old man just let out a grunt before turning to find the product. The blonde man leaned against the bar and gently knocked the wood in a small rhythm before he glanced at Brian. Their eyes locking. He felt an uneasy feeling settle in the young man… yet he also detected a hint of curiosity.

“...Can I help you?” The young man asked, cocking an eyebrow slightly. Brian hadn’t even noticed he was staring till now. But he couldn’t help it. The man was stunning. His ocean blue eyes were so inviting and his blonde hair fell to his shoulders in a slight wave. The way his lips parted naturally. And the smell that surrounded him. God… That was enough to set Brian off.

He watched the young blonde take the bottle for the old man and set some money down before facing Brian completely, waiting for an answer.

“I-... Sorry. I didn't mean to stare or come off rude. I’ve just never seen anyone with a strong presence like you.” He answered honestly. The young man eyed his a bit suspiciously before letting a small smile dance onto his pretty pink lips. The uneasy feeling slowly fading and was replaced with an intrigued feeling.

“Really?” Was all the younger asked. Brian flashed a small and nodded. “Well… I haven’t heard that before.” The blonde sighs out before taking a swing of his own drink, slowly settling himself beside Brian. Their shoulders touching ever so slightly making Brian’s throat clench

“...What’s your name.” Brian asks softly, looking down at the man. Ignoring the burning inside him.

“...It’s Roger.” Roger says, looking up at the older man with a small smile. “And yours?”

“Brian…” He answers.

“Well, Brian. I haven’t seen you around. You from around here?” Roger asks, tilting his head ever so slightly.

“Uh… I grew up around here… A long time ago though… I moved away because of-...Well… Complications.” He said slowly making the younger laugh softly. What a beautiful sound it was…

“‘Complications’? Well. I sure hope there’s nothing keeping you way now.” Roger smirks up and the older man. A flirtatious tone to his voice. Lust slowly building in the young man. Brian couldn’t help but smile. Humans were so easy to get riled up… Especially the young ones. He could almost remember how it felt…

“I don’t know… There are still complications… but it would be hard to stay away if I had something better to keep me here.” Brian flirted back watching those blue eyes darken and pink lips smirk more.

“I think I know something that could keep you here…” The blonde hints with a small lick of his lips, not showing a single ounce of shyness. Brian can’t help but stare at the now wet lips before clearing his throat.

“Can I buy your next drink?” He asks before tearing his eyes from those lips and to Roger’s eyes.

“Hm… I don’t know, can you~?” Roger teases. And oh, Brian knows he’s already caught up in the young man.

“I can bloody well try if you’ll let me. Stella Artois, right?” Brian smirks, sipping his guinness. The blonde smiles and sways slightly.

“Yeah… Stella Artois.” He confirms.

They stood at the bar for almost 2 hours and about 3 to 4 drinks. Brian could feel the others senses being numbed by the alcohol. He also felt the lust rising through… both of them to be honest… But his hunger also built up and he couldn’t take it anymore. Taking Roger by the arm, he lead him over to a more secluded part of the bar before pushing his against a wall and kissing the younger deeply. Tongue already plunging into the sweet, wet cavern of the blonde man. He felt the others arms fly around his neck to pull him closer. Those hands taking and gently pulling at the olders brown curls.

Brian’s senses overflowed with the sweet taste and smell of the pretty blonde. Gently grabbing those thin hips, he pulled away from the sweet lips before kissing and licking down his chin. Making his way to the others long, pale throat. Kissing down till he hit a perfect spot. The smell of the others blood was the strongest here, and oh Brian almost lost all control. He was able to keep control, but couldn’t help that throaty growl before licking at the special spot. Opening his mouth against Rogers neck, he felt his fangs brush against the soft skin making him groan. Though when it came time to bite… He couldn’t… He couldn’t bring himself to hurt the pretty man. His soft moans filling his ears and fingers playing with his hair.

If he bit him… The man… he could very well never see the light of day again, if his hunger was that bad… He didn’t want to kill him… He didn't deserve it… Not like this…

“Br-Brian..? What’s wrong?” Roger asked softly, confused as to why the older man came to a stop. Brian shook his head before pulling away.

“I-...Roger. You’re such a nice guy… I… You don’t deserve this. To be taken advantage of in a bar…” Brian says softly, looking away.

“Bri… What do you mean…? It’s… You’re not taking advantage of me.” He says quickly.

“... I’m sorry, Roger.” If only you knew how much danger you were in, you’d think differently… Brian thought before turning away. He started to walk, but felt Roger grab his arm.

“Wa-wait!... I-... I enjoyed tonight… Really….” Roger confesses. “I never thought I’d meet a nice guy like you here… And… god you’re too nice… Any other person wouldn’t of cared about taking advantage or not… I… What I’m saying is-... Will I at least see you again?” He asks, those blue eyes shimmering with Hope. Brian felt the worry and want inside the young man.

“I…. I can’t make any promises, Roger…” He said softly, watching the hope shatter and feeling sadness replace the others emotions. “But-... But I’ll try… okay…?” He says quickly.

“...You’ll try..?” Roger asks again, slight hope building back up as the older nods.

“Can’t promise, but yes, I’ll try…” He confirms before turning and leaving the pub. Not even waiting to look for Freddie. No. He needed to soothe this hunger, but he couldn’t be so close to that sweet scent...

#maylor #brian may #roger taylor #freddie mercury #john deacon #deacury #vampire #fanficiton #queen band #queen #queen fanfiction #gay #brian just wants to protect roger #brian just wants happiness #brian just wants #my only sun #brian has a thing for blondes #eventual smutt #gay-shit fanfiction

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smhtaehyung · 6 years

Text

when all daisies disappear🌼|| chapter 8

• masterlist

• Pairing: taehyung x OC (mental hospital au)

• Genre: angst, fluff, eventual smut, romance

• Word count: 4.3k

• Warning: swearing, will contain themes such as suicidal thoughts, depression and mentions of physical violence. Some of the backstory for Taehyung’s character is taken from the BTS concepts during the hyyh era. If you feel uncomfortable with the topic of mental illness, I advise you not to read further.

•••

chapter 8 ➸ 404 🌼

That night, after our kiss, sleeping seemed like it lasted for years. I completely dissappeared and forgot about all the things that worried me, and worried Taehyung too, because I did care a lot about that. I completely forgot what would happen in the morning once Taehyung feels the aftermath of our touches. The aftermath hit him violently the next day.

I woke up that evening from a tiring afternoon nap to hear Taehyung's hurried steps to get out of the room. My mind shot awake as I stood up, and without a thought, went after him. I saw him enter the toilets, so I rushed there. Taehyung was leaning over the toilet seat, almost throwing up, looking completely pale. "What are you doing?" I questioned, still feeling dizziness from waking up. I read a lot from Taehyung’s face in that moment. Taehyung felt so unlucky that I caught him. "I have to get it out of my system." He spoke, talking about the burden of touching me last night. As much as it hurt me, it hurt him too. The entire morning he looked all pale and couldn't contain his breaths. As the day passed he couldn't handle it anymore so he waited till I fell asleep. Touching him again started being a really bad thought once I saw Taehyung, sticking fingers down his throat, probably regretting what we did.

He coughed and tried to throw up, sticking his fingers deeper down. I wanted to hold him away but I couldn't. I couldn't physically hold him away and I couldn't make him stop if that's what he needed to feel better. I understood that. One of the nurses got to us and panickly questioned the situation. "What is happening here? Jia did you do something?!" She questioned, making me feel upset that that was her first thought. "It's my fault. Not hers." Taehyung defended me, spitting into the toilet. She sent me a warning glare and kneeled down to Taehyung, keeping her distance to not upset him. "You should get off the cold floor, Taehyung." She spoke, trying to comofort him. "What are you trying to do?" She asked, furrowing her eyebrows in worry. I stood by the door, not being able to move. I moved one step back and looked down the hallway, in a flash getting distracted by a taller guy who was standing next to the reception desk, waiting for a visitation pass. A lollipop was sticking out his mouth, and his eyes were covered by wearing a dark blue cap. Taehyung's voice interrupted my thoughts, my head flinching back to him scrunched on the floor. "I felt nauseous, so I wanted to throw it up." He said. "Are you feeling okay? You shouldn't force yourself to do that. We can get some food in you and you'll feel better. Do you need anything?" She tried to comfort him. Taehyung sighed and got up. I slightly walked backwards, catching that lollipop's guy attention. "I'm okay. Thank you." Taehyung softly spoke, forcing himself to smile a little bit. He locked eye contact with me, before he exited the toilets. "You have a visitor." She casually spoke to him as they walked out. Taehyung's entire body stiffened as he swallowed a hard lump in his throat. I stared at Taehyung with fear and worry over his reaction. He looked at me in a comforting manner, locking his eyes with mine. "There he is. Is he your friend? Would you like to talk to him?" She questioned, pointing to the same guy at the reception I observed. She wanted to make sure Taehyung was okay with whoever that person was.

Taehyung's eyes wandered around before finding him. I noticed they both stared at each other intensively, with a pained expression on their faces. Taehyung sighed and spoke up, trying to focus. "Yes, I'll be in the interaction lobby." He spoke. She smiled and started walking towards that guy, who still couldn't keep his eyes off of Taehyung. "Rat, are you-" I worriedly asked, but he cut me off. "Later." He started walking. "Taehyung!" I pleaded, but he didn't stop his steps. "I'll explain everything later, okay? We can talk about..last night too." He said over his shoulder and continued coldly walking. "Taehyung!" I called out for him again but he ignored me. I sighed and felt my eyes water. Once Taehyung was out of my sight, I turned around. The guy that was his visitor, heard me desperately call out Taehyung's name. He stopped in slight shock. I stared at him and began walking. I walked past him, ignoring his stares. He observed me for a second before he began walking to the interaction room. "Jiyu, who's that? You gave him the visitor's pass-" I stopped Jiyu as she was walking past me. "He's a friend of Taehyung's. Why?" She asked, slightly puzzled at my curiosity. "He doesn't really seem like he is his friend." I whispered. Jiyu tried to hear but the noises from behind us were too loud for a whisper. "What did you say?" She questioned. "Nothing important." I said and started walking down the hallway to the interaction room. "Jia. Don't do anything. Let him talk to his friend." Jiyu pleaded, with a voice that didn't carry much hope. "Don't worry. I won't." I quickly said and continued walking.

I took a few deep breaths before I entered the room. There were two of our older male ward mates lazily playing table tennis. Minjee was holding her earmuffs as she saw me walk in. There was a very numb looking girl sitting on the couch with a remote in her hand. I walked in and immediately caught Taehyung's attention. I casually ignored him and plopped down onto the couch, taking a remote from the girl's hand, switching the channel. "I'm not going to steal your earmuffs, kid. These yellow ones look very pretty on you." I complimented Minjee in an unusually bright tone. She slowly removed her hands from her earmuffs and widened her eyes, surprised by my compliment. "Th-thank you." She smiled, looking all shy. "Awww. You're a cute kid, Minjee." I said and gently nudged her arm in a friendly way. I glanced at Taehyung, who was observing me the same way his friend did. I ignored it, trying to seem casual. "Chocolate?" I pulled Taehyung's candy bag out of my pocket and offered it to Minjee. She gladly accepted it, a bright smile appearing on her face. "Now you steal from me?" Taehyung playfully scoffed in disbelief, to which Minjee just laughed. I giggled at her cuteness and stroked her hair. Maybe it was this softer phase I was going through, or the influence of Taehyung that made me think that I also forgot to give Minjee another chance. She was just a girl, not much older than I was when I got here. Minjee will be 13 next week, and such a simple thought about her age reminded me of all my birthdays here. With that thought in mind, I started thinking about how it would have been if I had an older female friend that would be like a sister to me. Since I didn’t have that, why wouldn’t I try to offer that to Minjee?

"Klepto." Taehyung teased under his breath, thinking I wouldn't hear him. "Rat." I said in a serious tone, focusing on the TV screen. After a few seconds, I observed Taehyung and his friend from the corner of my eye. Taehyung spoke, changing a mood to a more serious one. I couldn't make most of what they were saying, so all my questions were left unanswered. I did notice Taehyung felt more uneasy with each second, and that made my heart race with worry.

🌼🌼- Taehyung's POV -🌼🌼

Many thoughts went through my head when Jia entered the room. Was she doing this because she was curious about Namjoon or if this is just one of her games to provoke me? I tried not to stare too much at her and Minjee who were eating my chocolate candies and seemed like they were getting on pretty well. I smiled for a second but then looked at Namjoon, who swirled the lollipop with his tongue to the other side of the inside of his cheek.

"Taehyung-ah, I'm sorr-" Namjoon tried to speak, but I looked away. "Why didn't you answer that call?" I asked in a cold tone. he swallowed a hard lump and spoke. "I was scared." He quietly said. "I didn't know it would all end up this way." He said and I scoffed in disbelief. "I didn't want to run away-" He started speaking but I cut him off again, not letting him explain. "Why did you do that to me then?" I asked, my heart dropping each second passing by. "Taehyung-ah-" He spoke but I kept on talking. "If you came here to aplogize, then you should leave, hyung. I don't want to hear that from you. Liar." I said as I looked down. Namjoon's eyes watered. "C'mon Taehyung don't be like that. Remember how good it used to be." He said and slid a polaroid picture of all of us across the table. He also pulled out a blue spray can. All those painful memories flashed through my mind. I felt myself growing weaker, hating all of what had happened. Every beautiful memory now seemed so painful.

All the regret. All the pain I went through, hoping they would heal me. At that moment it was all great. I even forgot about what I had done when I was too occupied running. Running to our sea, without any thoughts of what would wait for us if we ever fell under the pressure.

If we could only turn back time. I wish I could be forgiven for the sin I made. For the blood spilled. How come my big sinner wings appeared in only a few short seconds after what I had done? Why did a curse immediately follow my bloody hands? I guess I deserve it all.

"Reminiscing about memories won't make me erase your failed promise to be by my side. Especially during the trial." I said, staring at him with disgust in my eyes. "I know." He said and looked down, not knowing what to say for it all to change to better. "What else do you want?" I asked in a rude tone, almost snapping at him. I turned my head slightly to my left to catch Jia staring at me. She quickly turned her head away. I observed her pretty eyes that focused all too well on the TV. Her soft hair. Touching her hair last night made my body and mind travel to many bad places, but a part of me craved for her. A part of me still wants to remember what physical affection feels like, even when I know I don't deserve it. "Jin hyung came by the gas station yesterday. He asked a lot about you." Namjoon spoke so timidly, making me remember my last bad encounter I had with hyung. A bad memory flushed my mind. All the bad memories we all experienced after we stopped going to the sea and after Jungkook's car accident.

"I don't want to see hyung." I directly spoke. "Taehyung, you don't really think that Seokjin hyung hit Jungkook, right?" He questioned, trying to make it seem absurd. "I don't know." I spat out, becoming more agitated and frustrated by my thoughts. So much pain washed over me, the more I thought about the past. And thinking about the past always led and still leads me to think about my biggest sin. My biggest regret and a trauma that caused me to be this abnormal creature who dreads physical contact.

Pain. I caused so much pain out of basic anger and fear. I was so angry watching him hurt his own blood all those years, yet I never thought I would do such a thing. Every touch started to hurt from that moment. I don’t think I could ever forget my sister’s screams of terror and the blood that gushed out of my father’s stomach. I remember my life after that. At first, when my friends would touch my shoulder in a comforting way, I would grip my teeth, feeling uncomfortable and not worth enough of any affection by any human. But soon that simple uncomfortable feeling turned into a phobia and pain.

So much pain. And the blood. The blood that covered my clean white t-shirt and my frail hands that were bound to be filthy forever. They will never be washed enough, no matter how many showers I take or how many times I sanitize my hands. The blood and murder I carry on my hands will forever be here.

"Can you go now? I'm not feeling well." I said and looked away from him. He tried to reach for my shoulder but stopped himself when he remembered my phobia. "I'm sorry, Taehyung. I didn't know it would all end up like this." Namjoon spoke and stood up. "Just leave me alone to rot in here. I don't deserve any better." I furrowed my eyebrows and whispered, to which Namjoon tried to comfort me. "Don't. Just leave." I spoke before he could, still looking away.

"I'm looking after her. The best I can." Namjoon said, talking about my sister. I could never look at her again. Not after she witnessed what I had done. The biggest trauma of them all, during all these years. "At least you're doing something." I said. "I'm sorry Taehyung. If you can ever forgive me, come meet me and we can all go to-" He tried to speak but I couldn't listen, so I cut him off. "The sea. I know." I furrowed my eyebrows and showed coldness. He sighed and spoke after a few long seconds. "Bye Taehyung." He said and started walking, leaving me with a spray can and a polaroid picture. Two damaging memories in such random objects.

🌼🌼- Jia's POV -🌼🌼

I heard a quickened steps as I turned my head to Taehyung. His friend got up and left, his eyes full of tears. Taehyung still sat on his chair, the expression on his face completely cold. After half a minute, he stood up and picked up a spray can and a polaroid picture his friend left, leaving me confused. He hurried down the hallway as I jumped up from the couch to follow him. He went to our opened room, kicking it with his leg to close it once he was inside. I timidly walked there, swallowing a hard lump in my throat. Collecting the courage before knocking, I breathed in and out. I softly knocked on the door. "Taehyung?" I spoke, slowly opening the door. I went inside and closed the door behind me, making the room escape the noise from the hallway. Taehyung held the spray can in his hand, and the polaroid picture in the other. "I don't think those are sanitized, Taehyung." I spoke, trying to break off the mere silence that was followed by my timid posture and his rapid breaths. "It's no point. I can't escape from it. From them. I can't. Why am I trying so hard?" He questioned himself, shutting his eyes over the loudness of his mind.

It made me think that Taehyung enjoyed misery because the feeling of guilt he felt. "Rat, please. Calm down." I softly spoke, walking over to him. I kneeled down and felt powerless because a touch wasn't comforting for him. And all I wanted to do was to hold him and stoke his hair.

"It's okay." I softly spoke, feeling my voice break and my tears water. Taehyung felt pain in his chest as he shut his eyes. He was going through one of his traumatic episodes again. I widened my eyes in shock. "I'll go get the nurses." I spoke in panic. I stood up but Taehyung stopped me by grabbing my arm. "Don't." He said as I gasped at sudden contact. He shut his eyes in a tight line and pulled me onto him, making me straddle his lap. He immediately attacked my lips, pressing soft kisses. I knew exactly right what he was doing in that moment. Kissing me and touching me was a punishment he wanted to put himself through. I immediately picked upon the feeling of guilt he felt and his groans of pain.

Taehyung's hands started stroking my thighs as he deepened the kiss. He started kneading the soft flesh hungrily, enjoying his pain and misery. I quickly moved away from him, standing up. I felt a tear roll down my cheek. "Don't hurt yourself like this, please Rat." I said, feeling my voice break again. He leaned his head against my stomach as I stood up. His arms were around my hips, not wanting let go of the misery. I felt myself completely breaking, so I moved away. "Stop hurting yourself!" I raised my voice and walked a few steps back.

Taehyung wiped his cheeks that were wet from his tears. "I don't deserve it. I don't deserve y-you. I should have been tak-taken away." He stuttered, trying to breathe. "Taken away? Taehyung, what are you talking about? Who was the guy that visited you?" I kneeled down again, trying to look into his eyes.

"A friend of mine. A liar. He didn't do it. He didn't pick up the phone. He let them take me." Taehyung whispered to himself, panically holding his hands over his ears. "Who is them? Who took you?" I softly questioned. "The police." He breathed out. "He didn't-didn't pick up the phone." He repeated in panic. "Taehyung. Why were you arrested? It happened multiple times didn't it?" I questioned, trying to figure it all out. My hand instinctively wanted to cup his cheek but I stopped myself, fighting that caring and affectionate urge. Taehyung spoke, nervously switching the topic after he saw my hand flinch back. "Why do you want to comfort me? How can you touch me? Can't you see how gross I am?!" He breathed out and in a flash got up and started walking around the room, trying to collect his breathing, unsuccessfully.

"Taehyung, tell me what you did. Please. What have you done so bad that ended up being this trauma? Why do you think you're gross?" I softly questioned walking behind his every nervous step. Taehyung kept shutting his eyes as I noticed his hands were shaking. "You're going to run away from me. You will leave me too." Taehyung was now crying, not wanting to tell me. "I'm not going to leave you. Just fucking tell me already, I can't handle this!" I screamed out, feeling miserable. He shook his head, avoiding eye contact. I got so much closer to him and grabbed him by his neck. He quickly moved my hand away as I spoke. "Fucking tell me-!" I raised my voice again, but quietly stood once Taehyung's raspy scream interrupted me.

"I KILLED MY FATHER!" He screamed out, inches away from my face. Then it was silence. In that deafening silence, an interesting thought made its way to my brain. A thought of everyday version of Taehyung, a clean, pure boy that dressed in white and took care of daisies as if he was one of their kind. He did have a tragic backstory and sad days when even his precious daisies gave him no meaning to this life we live in. That's Kim Taehyung. How could you ever imagine that exactly that boy, that lovable boy with perky ears, committed such a crime? Could you have guessed? No one could. That boy murdered another man. Now that boy, who committed such a sin, feels unbearable guilt. That angry boy who killed his father probably didn't think that his once fragile touch would cause so much pain. That was his touch that carried a curse. A curse and a misery no one would be able to understand.

"What-?" I asked, my facial expression stiffening. “I-I killed him. I stabbed him with the glass bottle.” He said and continued with an unbelievably pained expression on his face. Tears streamed down his face, saying all this out loud to me. “I don’t deserve any of this. They dragged me out of the water, you know?” He was whispering, trying to explain. “I didn’t mean to do it. He abused me and my sister for years, how could I have not snapped when I saw him?!” Taehyung’s voice broke as he raised his tone. “Calm down, Rat. It’s okay-” I tried to comfort him because I didn’t know what to say from all the shock. “It’s not fucking okay. I’m a monster.″ He flinched and covered his eyes with his hands. Taehyung stared at his hands and rubbed them against his white clothes. He had a sudden thought and headed for the door. “Taehyung, where are you going? Please calm down, please don’t go.” I pleaded for him, trying to make him stay. “I don’t deserve the comfort y-you want to offer me. I’m a monster. I don’t want to hurt you. Stay away from me, pl-please.” Taehyung spoke, suddenly changing his fear of losing me to a fear of hurting me. He walked through the door, opening the doorknob with his bare hands. Even in those smallest actions and details, I hated seeing him hurt himself like that.

He stormed down the hallway as I tried following him. People walked right past me, so I completely lost track of him. I started crying, some people noticing me. I walked to the art room, bumping into worried Jiyu. “Ji, what’s wrong? Why are you crying?” She quickly asked, stroking my shoulders. “I need to find him. I don’t know where he is. Tae-Taehyung.” I explained. “What do you mean you don’t know where he is?” She asked. “He ran-ran out of our room, he told me about his dad. He-he said it to me.” I barely explained, words caught in between my tongue and teeth. Jiyu widened her eyes but tried to stay calm, just so she can calm me down. “Okay, he must be here somewhere, Ji. Don’t panic.” She softly spoke and walked with me. Some nurses were confused, so Jiyu explained to them why I was crying. Whilst she was talking with them, my brain functioned quickly. The washroom. He probably went there. To “clear off” the blood, like the last time.

I started running towards the washroom, my mind blocking any sounds from the hallway noise or Jiyu calling out my name. I went inside and saw Taehyung’s figure. My brain was right, the sight of Taehyung’s scratched out red skin made my heart cave in inside of my chest. He stood under the running shower, shirtless, only in his pajama bottoms that he didn’t seem to mind. Scratching his skin with the rough sponge, his back was turned towards me. “Taehyung.” I spoke, my voice breaking. “Leave me alone! I need to clear off the blood. I need to!” He screamed. Not wanting him to irritate his skin till it bleeds, I ran over to him. “Taehyung, stop. It’s okay-” I tried to speak. “Don’t say that!” He shouted, making my knees buckle. He turned towards me, hyperventilating, mainly because he realised no water from this world could wash out the blood he saw. Without a thought, I went under the shower with him, trying to stop his hand that was holding the sponge, but he slapped my hand away. He shut his eyes in a tight line from the sudden contact. He kept on rubbing his skin. Desperate to keep him safe, I distracted him with a kiss. I kissed his lips, to which he stiffened. He pulled away, trying to move back. I held onto his neck and he clenched his fists, hating the contact, but easing to it to feel his beloved misery.

“Shhh, It’s okay.“ I said, leaning my forehead against his. He slid down to the wet floor, crying his eyes out. I turned off the water, my other hand around his shoulder. He wanted to break free but I held him tightly, his head pressing to my chest. He tried to push me away but he couldn’t, so he just cried onto me. Jiyu and the other nurses worriedly came inside and gasped when they saw us. Taehyung began holding onto me, letting me comfort him. “You’re not a monster, Taehyung.“ I softly spoke, stroking his wet hair. “I’m not going to leave.“ I said and kept on talking as he softly breathed. “Don’t rub your skin like that. Don’t hurt yourself, okay?“ I whispered, softening my grip but as he calmed down, he still held onto me tightly. Taehyung nodded and didn’t let go of me. Jiyu stared at us with pain plastered onto her face. I looked at her and looked down, not being able to explain anything. “Taehyung, sweety? Let’s go take care of you.“ She softly spoke as the other nurses walked closer. Jiyu stared at me as I nodded and tried to move away, but Taehyung was holding onto me, tightly. “Taehyung-ie, let me go.“ I softly spoke as he rested for a second before pulling away, his arms stiffening. I got up with him and the two short nurses guided him to the medical office. I looked over Jiyu’s shoulder, catching eye contact with him before he went out of my sight. His eyes were bloodshot red and his cheeks wet. His hair was wet too, making his perky ears poke out more through his hair. He stared through me before completely getting me out of his sight. “Jia.“ Jiyu spoke to me, making me snap back my attention to her. “How is he able to touch you?“ She asked, her face full of confusion. “If you’re thinking it’s enjoyable to him, it’s not.“ I answered, my eyes burning from crying. “I’ll explain everything.” I spoke up. “When he explains it to me too.“ I said and looked down to the wet floor.

part 9

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ofhxrror · 7 years

Text

OFHXRROR’S RP GUIDE: HOW TO PLAY A CHARACTER WITH EPILEPSY.

While I have nothing against the other rp guide’s who tell you what epilepsy and some of them explain it great, they feel like that’s all they are doing explaining it. So here is an rp guide coming from someone who has GE for those who want to play a character with it. ( below will have what GE is, what it can feel like, how it can effect the people around you, how to roleplay a grand mal / tonic - colonic seizure, and the long term + short term effects of a seizure. )

UPDATED: 06/16/2020

What is GE ( Generalized Epilepsy )

GE is a type of epilepsy that comes with no primary cause and comes from the whole brain rather than it stemming from one part of the brain, it also mostly happens durning childhood ( but can happen in adulthood just when that happens their’s less of a chance that you will grow out of it ). There is two possible outcomes with this type of epilepsy, Option One the patient stays on medication for two years and at the end is able to be taken off those meds without any trouble thus for some reason is now cured of GE; Option Two however is more common and likely they stay two years on medication but still have trouble thus aren’t cured of GE.

Symptoms of GE ( what it can feel like )

This is my personally experience with GE but before I was on medication this is what it normally felt like to me which scary enough often felt close enough to an aura ( aka a warning sign to a seizure ); - Numbness / Out Of Body Moments - Tasting Copper / Blood - Random Dizziness / Lightheadedness - Getting Nauseous - Sleepiness - Headaches - Anxiety / Worsen Anxiety - Depression / Worsen Depression - Myoclonic Jerking: which fun fact is another minor form of seizing, I developed this over a very short period of time and it comes even though I am medicated.

How GE might effect your Muse

GE is one of those things that can effect people in so many different ways that it’s hard to guess which ways you muse might be effected so here are so suggestions; - your muse might just hole up in a comfy place out of fear of having a seizure at an unknown point ( me for like a month after my first one ) / place or they might keep living their life giving GE a big fuck you and just shrugging it off ? - if your muse already has anxiety and / or depression think would they get worse for having this in their life? - your muse might draw away from people due to just panic and stress or would your muse lean on the ones that they have more? - if they have anger problems they might get worse because they might feel like the world if screwing with them? - if they are super prepared they might wear a medical alert bracelet or carry a card with them at all times that says they have GE now. I didn’t leave my room for a month unless it was to shower, I did all my school work at home, and my depression shot through the roof after my first seizure. But then after awhile I missed people so I got out again and it was scary at first so I clung to those I could trust like a baby monkey. Now I’m not scared at all of having an attack because I trust the people around me which leads me too...

How GE might effect the people around your Muse.

Okay this will hit people hard or soft from what I’ve seen there is no two ways about it folks, if they have seen your muse have a seizure it’s going to hard and if they haven’t seen your muse have a seizure it’s going to be soft. Right after my first seizure my mom didn’t leave my side and then when I had a seizure around a guy I was seeing he didn’t let go of my hand. But when I tell people I have GE it’s “okay so you wanna get pizza later.” but sometimes it’s “okay so if you have a seizure what do you want me to do.” So it just makes a difference on what type of personality your muse’s people have, plot it out, ask your the other muse’s owner “does this work?” and if not keep plotting till you find something that works.

How to roleplay a Grand Mal Seizure.

You’re muse is overworked, or is lacking sleep, or is just unlucky whatever the case you want to roleplay a seizure. Well here the info you will need labeled from start to finish from a good amount of research and memory: START; your muse might get something called an aura which could be a number of things, for me it was always the taste of blood like loads and loads it followed my right hand jerking out of my control ( a myoclonic seizure ). For your muse it could be anything ranging from numbness, to a headache, to nausea. These can last anywhere to ten mintues to an hour and half but they don’t last much longer than that because next is... MIDDLE; if your muse is really unlucky they might just skip right to this part which is when the seizure happens, which durning a bunch of things can happen. Now these have two phases which are known as the tonic phase and the colonic phase which is the reason for the name. During the tonic phase your muse will lose consciousness ( though sometimes people don’t and are awake which isn’t rare but is really uncommon ) and they start to tense up, often making loud moaning sounds as air is being force out of their lungs. If your muse is standing or sitting they will fall down due to the fact that their skeletal muscles are tensing up, this phase is the shortest. In the colonic phase your muse will start to convulse, which can be as light or as violent as the seizure goes on. The eyes will roll up into head and often if your muse is not not biting down on something the tongue / lips will get bitten ( sometimes to the point where it might get bitten off, meaning do not have or let anyone put their muses hands in your’s mouth because they will lose them ), the lips may turn blue. finally it’s over but now comes the .... END; when your muse wakes up they might not know where they are or who they are but they will get it all back shortly, it helps to have someone remind them. vomiting and crying are also side effects due to the large emotional stress it does apply to the brain / body ( I experianced vomiting, crying, panic and huge amounts of tiredness due to the seizure, it took the nursing staff telling me what happened for me to be okay. )

Long Term + Short Term effects of seizures.

Even one seizure can effect your brain so your muse will have both Short Term and Long Term effects to struggle with, I know this fact very well. The shorter effects of the seizures can be:

- Amnesia / Confusion - Suttering - Crying / Violent Sobbing - Vomiting - Low Emotional Thresh Hold - Short Term Memory Loss - Shaking - Cuts / Broken Bones / Bruises - Sore Muscles - Intense Sleepiness

Long Term effects can be:

- Suttering - Trouble With Memory - Worsened ADD / ADHD - Twitching / Jerking / Shaking Hand Motions also know as myoclonic seizures. - Confusion - Sleepiness - Lack Of Appetite - Weight Loss - Coma’s / Death / Brain Bleeds

Why do you want to roleplay this?

Finally I have to ask this question as someone who lives their life with this curse, it’s truly a hellscape some days and honestly it’s no fun waking up some mornings with your head spinning and arm smacking you in the face. My body does not feel like mine, it’s possessed by some creature that I cannot get rid of because modern medicine doesn’t have a fix yet. Please think about that when you add this to your character, I just want you to know all the points of epilepsy that while yes most people with the disease can live normal healthy lives, it’s not fun and it sucks. I’m not trying to be an asshole I just wanted to underline how serious it really is and make sure you aren’t just sticking your chara with this illness for brownie points.

thank you for coming to my ted talk!

#rp help #rp guide #rpc #seizures tw #epilepsy tw #medication tw #( mine. )#( rp resource. )

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mggpleasedontlookhere · 3 years

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adams

request: Hi! I have a request, could you do one where the reader is a part of the BAU team, and she’s dating Spence, and she’s watching him interrogate Cat Adams, and she has to hear her say that she’s pregnant with Spence’s baby? Thanks!

for: @mggbler

word count: 2,965 reading time aprox: 11 mins

a/n: so i’m back? also another thing, if you are requesting an imagine, id really appreciate it if you had your username listed as it will be much easier to tag you, but it is whatever you’re comfortable with <3

masterlist

My fingertips drummed against the cool concrete frame that lined the two-way window. My feet were firmly planted on the hard floors of the prison as I gazed intensely at the scene before me. An ember lit aflame inside of me as Cat Adams tantalizingly edged closer towards Spencer, diminishing the proximity between their faces. Every tedious inch she took, I dissociated farther and farther away into my headspace; although I could still hear her pretentious tone through my earpiece as she brushed her fingers against Spencer’s eyelids.

“Close your eyes”

This is bullshit.

“Good, now keep them shut. Sit back and relax”

I turned my head aside to look away, pinching the inner crevice of my elbow to regain my sense of reality. My composure was noticeably calm on the exterior, something I’ve picked up in the years of working at the BAU, but the expanding coil of indignation continued to wind as time passed.

My patience had always been one of my greatest virtues, yet Cat Adams was able to deteriorate that virtue with her nonchalant fingers softly grazing the skin of Spencer’s hands, the licking of her lips as she whispered suggestive words on his neck, and that flame in her eyes that convinced her she was all-powerful.

“Now when you open your eyes...I want you to look at me like I’m the first woman you’ve seen after being in prison for three months”

I breathed through my lips, reassuring myself of Spencer’s affections. Yet an insurmountable amount of insecurity peaked into the bottom of my stomach, clawing its way up to my throat. I felt restrained within my own skin, combating the urge to pick and pry at the flesh.

“If she touches…” I muttered to myself, biting the inside of my cheek as my words trailed off into uncomfortable anticipation.

“You’re here! You’re really here” Cat celebrated, welcoming Spencer in her chaotic delusion. A mischievous grin appeared on her lips, Spencer fabricating a benevolent facade as he let himself grow comfortable in her scheme.

“There is nowhere else I would rather be” Spencer replied with many endeavors, sending a chilling shot through my chest.

It’s fake...it’s all fake

“You’re good at this...you’re so good at this” Cat shook her head, gazing at Spencer with much admiration and recognition. “I almost believe you don’t want to kill me” She teased.

“I don’t want to kill you” Spencer hastily admitted, replicating Cat’s gaze of fervor. As ironic as it seemed, it became a game of cat and mouse. Who would concede first?

“What if I let your mother die?” Cat blurted out, gauging at Spencer’s reaction to her explicit words. But to no avail, Spencer expressed no tells or twitches that would give away his robust collectedness. “Then would you kill me?” She continued.

Spencer stared at her with an unimpressed look, unfazed by the mention of his mother. A small smirk resided on the corners of his supple lips, raising his eyebrows in a lack of interest as if the lifeless walls of the room seemed blasé.

“Oh...my mistake” She paused, chuckling to herself as a devious Cheshire grin appeared on her lips. “What about Y/N?” She spat.

How did she…

The once present smirk on Spencer’s face faltered, yet he remained his fortitude. He closed in on her, peering at her in suspicion. “What about Y/N?” Spencer reiterated, using reverse psychology to throw her off.

Cat pushed herself off the edge of the table, leaning back into her chair with an impervious attitude. “Cut the crap Spencie, I know about your little romance” She taunted humorously, rolling her eyes as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “I know about the little pet you keep around” She badgered, causing a chink off of Spencer’s armor to be revealed.

My fists clenched beside me, absorbing the evident frustration coursing through my veins. I cringed as I bit down on the muscle of my cheeks, the taste of metal coating my tongue momentarily. I kept myself grounded for the sake of the interrogation, but if the life of Diana and Spencer wasn’t on the line, I would be the one interviewing the psychotic bitch myself.

“I thought we were supposed to be talking about my mother” Spencer breathed out, leaning back in his chair to cover up for his slip in character.

“You know what’s the best part, Spencie?” Cat leaned over the table, ignoring the words Spencer had previously spoken and hovered a few inches away from his ear. For a moment she deviated her focus from Spencer and directed it towards the two-way glass. Even in the split second, she broke away from her main target, you could see the mischief and ego festering in the pit of her eyes. “I know she’s watching us...I know how much it’s killing her just watching us” Cat seduced, trailing her fingertips suggestively up Spencer’s arm.

Spencer tore his shoulder away from her roughly, pulling up the cuffs of his sleeves in a sensible manner. “You said you wanted to play a game earlier,” Spencer reminded her, battling the urge to prove Cat wrong and reassure the woman on the other side of the glass. “Is it the same as last time?”

“Oh Spencie…” Cat sighed, retracting herself back to her seat. Suddenly her stare drifted back to the two-way glass, and with as much authority she can harbor, she peered through the mirror with much affliction. “I can’t wait till she finds out about Mexico” She blurted out in faux innocence.

This pricked at Spencer’s ears, leading him to profile the words that spilled out her mouth. “What happened in Mexico?” He inquired, pressing her on the missing fragments of his whereabouts that lead to his arrest. She simply tiptoed around his request, taunting him as she refused to take her blazing eyes off the glass.

A loud bang reverberated off the walls. This caused Cat’s attention to halt as it shifted towards the source of the ringing sound, only to find out that it was Spencer’s hand harshly slamming against the table. “What happened in Mexico?” Spencer reiterated once again, but this time his tone barely held back the chagrin clouding his rationality. The booming volume of his usually gentle voice complimented the aftershock of the wood beneath his palm as it still rattled underneath his force.

“Are you getting a little aggressive Spencie? I didn’t even know you were capable of that” She mocked, tucking her arms to her side while her hands roamed the circumference of her stomach. Spencer glared at her incredulously, deciding that he had enough of her drudging ploys. He pushed his chair back, making the motion to get up and leave the room, but before he had the opportunity to stand up, two words were revealed into the already perturbed air.

“I’m pregnant,”

Spencer froze in his spot, taking a moment to breathe before shaking his head and proceeding towards the door. I scoffed in disgust, waiting for Spencer on the other side of the door. Even for Cat this was low.

I can’t imagine anyone using pregnancy for their own gai-

“...actually we’re pregnant, Spencie”

Everything stilled. Oxygen refused to fill my lungs and my blood ran cold. The same seemed to occur with Spencer as his feet were motionless like he was stuck in a fragment of time. The words kept passing through me like waves echoing from a cymbal, only this time it was endless. No matter what I did, the words never resonated in my head. I became deaf, some may say that I was in denial. But I heard it. I heard it slip past as a whisper on her lips.

I felt numb for what seemed like an eternity. But it was that same numbness that I wished never went away, so I wouldn’t have felt the overwhelming sickness that came after. My stomach boiled with an uncomfortable sensation. The ringing descended into the quiet of my mind as clarity began to flood my consciousness.

That’s not...that’s not possible

Cat did it. She found a way--a loophole.

Can it be possible?

I suppressed the paralyzing thoughts into a small compartment of my mind, letting a small murmur of reason dictate my actions. With naive hope, I rushed to a guard to request a Cat’s health records with much haste. After the small interaction, all I could do was wait.

Wait for answers. Wait for the truth.

Yet again my virtues were being tested. I thought the first time I would harbor an immense uneasiness over pregnancy, it would be my own. I was imprisoned in my own doubts and speculation, but I can’t even begin to comprehend the thoughts that are permeating the dark place of Spencer’s mind.

What does this mean for me and...

No, I can’t think like that. She’s probably lying.

But what if…

I shook the thoughts out of my head, focusing on the grey-tinted walls that surrounded me. I forced myself to fixate on how the overhead light reflected on the shiny tiles beneath my feet, while I let the background noises of an operating prison engulf my sense of hearing.

But nothing could ever prevent my buried thoughts from climbing out from the back of my subconscious. Nothing could stop the anticipation that coursed through my veins, threatening to stop my heart altogether.

Nothing could’ve stopped me from knowing.

The cold zing of the walls was the only thing that tethered me to reality. I felt the way my hip bones would shift under my weight as I sat motionless in the hallway. I felt the pressure and ache that began to build under my knees as they were pressed against my chest. A heavy film cast over my eyelids, making it exhausting for me to keep them open. There was an agonizing shackle tugging at my chest, restraining me from taking a fresh breath. I was battered and beaten, not physically, but mentally.

With two words, Cat Adams had managed to send me spiraling down a sinkhole that I didn’t know how to get out of. I was stuck, encased in my own headspace. I didn't know what was worse: being in prison or being imprisoned by the person you detested the most.

I thought the worst was over when she confessed to her pregnancy. I thought the anguish that I experienced hit its climax. But little did I know that the growing hole in my chest only consumed me further when I found out she was telling the truth.

In bold letters, ‘pregnant’ was displayed on the front of her health records. Now they were measly tossed to the floor in a flurry of confusion and anger.

A choked breath emerged from my esophagus, finally feeling the full impact of the circumstances that I was in the middle of. I was furious, dazed, and somber simultaneously, and I didn’t know if it was for me or Spencer.

Spencer…

Does he know it's true? Would he know?

He wouldn’t have chea…? No, he wouldn’t

As if it was the answer to my inquiries, the clatter of footsteps resounded from the head of the hallway, the clacks against the floor growing in volume as they approached me. Stunned by my own senses, I didn’t even notice the sight of grey fabric coming in from my peripheral view.

It was only until I heard the rhythmic beat of the footsteps faltering in a slower pace till they stopped completely. Suddenly, a tender hand apprehensively reached out from beside me. Warmth instantly radiated off its palm as it battled with the chilled temperature of my skin. Then, a voice, belonging to Spencer, followed the small gesture in a quaint and reserved tone.

“I…” He paused, intertwining his fingers with mine. “I know I haven’t talked about Mexico--or prison for the matter. I know that sometimes I close myself up in a box and hideaway, and you tell me it's okay if I’m not comfortable,” He swallowed his words for a moment, staring at his sprawled-out legs in front of him as he struggled to find the right words. “But I also know how much it hurts you when I do…” He uttered out. “I know that it hurts you when JJ’s the only person I can talk to about what happened” He turned his head to gauge my reception, but all I could bring my attention to was the soreness in my chest at his mentions.

“Did you know?” I meekly whispered.

“I don’t...I don’t know” Spencer answered unsurely. His voice seemed depleted of any assurance he carried with him when it came to his knowledge. I guess that was a common denominator between us in the present circumstance. “I don’t...I don’t know what she did” He sucked in a sharp breath, careful to let his words teeter around the break in his voice.

“She’s really pregnant Spence…” I muttered, squeezing the clutch he had on my hand. “It’s gonna be okay Spence. I know you would never…” My voice trailed off into the uncertainty of my words, yet the hope that was latched onto me prevailed. “There’s more to this, I know it” I stated with much determination.

“What if it’s...it’s mine?” He gasped, a melancholy air following his statement.

“Well, you didn’t, you know-”

“No, I--I would never” He finished the sentence, racking his head for clues.

“Then there has to be someone el-”

“She did something,” Spencer cut me off. “When I was in there, she told me that Lindsey--she got me to…”. By the wavering of his voice, I knew where this was headed. “A-and she told Lindsey to pretend that she was you…” He scoffed, shaking his head in self-reproach.

“Spence…” I tried to stop him from his own demise, but I knew the second he started sputtering words, there would be no mercy to it.

“She started mocking you and my mom, and that’s when...I don’t--I” He paused, licking his lips. “I felt so angry--more than I’ve ever had in my life--and I just,” He retracted his hand from mine in an instant, brushing the stray hairs away from his face. “I pushed her Y/N. I pushed her against the wall and I started--gosh--I started choking her Y/N”. The structure of his tone fizzled out into a meek mumble, an indication that he was battling his internal demons.

The guilt and agony on his face were enough to devastate an entire colony. So much weight and history hung on the surface of his shoulders that it was starting to deteriorate. “I’m...I’m scared that this is who I am now” He lamented, picking at the small pebbles that littered the floor.

“No, don’t say that” I protested.

“Y/-Y/N, you don’t know…” He sighed.

“I do know” I affirmed, reaching out to clasp his hand in mine once again. “I know you had to do things in prison, things you aren’t proud of, but anyone in your position would have done the same-”

“You wouldn’t have”

“Yes. Yes, I would have Spence” I remarked. “If someone threatened my life, if...if someone threatened my chance of seeing you again...”. I placed a gentle hand under his chin, making our eyes meet. “You bet your ass I would. It doesn’t make you a bad person” I finished my spiel, looking into his dull eyes in the hopes he would recognize that I meant every word.

“Then why do I feel like this? I’ve let down the team, my mom, and you…”

I cupped his face in my hands, although he refused to look at me in the eyes. “Spence,” I breathed. “You have not done a single thing to disappoint anybody” I shook my head as my voice trembled under the weight of the conversation. “If you disappointed anyone, then why is the entire team working to get this psychotic bitch on death row? Why are they trying to save your mom? Why do I love you?” I professed, every endearing word flowing out of my lips with ease.

Silence encompassed both of us, but the dense atmosphere still created an evident divide. Suddenly, he met my eyes with his solemn ones, but something was different. A minuscule glint of prospect flashed in the pool of his irises. The color and life began to emerge from the dreariness of his countenance and the warmth of his skin began to crimson his cheeks. A relieved gasp escaped my lips as he peered at me with much endearment.

“Do you really think that?” He whispered. I nodded in response, taking my bottom lip into my teeth as I took in the beauty of his rejuvenating presence. From there I knew Spencer would slowly fill up again. I knew it was going to be hard, but I also knew that I wouldn’t hesitate to take every step with him.

“I know that everything isn’t clear right now Spence. But I think--I know--that you’re the only person here that can solve this”

“You’re wrong” He breathed.

I stared at him with a baffled expression, encouraging him to continue his position.

“I can’t...I wouldn’t be able to do all of this,” He rested his hand on the apple of my cheek, caressing the supple skin with his thumb. “...not without you”

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