#i have not looked into whether men and women can train together and honestly i will not we are suspending disbelief

[theghostofashton]

wip wednesday

thank you to @welcometololaland @strandnreyes @paperstorm @carlos-in-glasses @sanjuwrites @lemonlyman-dotcom @alrightbuckaroo @heartstringsduet for the tags <3

it occurred to me that i am planning an olympics au and this is an olympic year (aka the perfect time to post one) so i have picked this story back up as i wrap up the you saw the truth in me sequel. here's a bit of that:

“It’s not you,” Marjan says quietly. She beckons him closer so she can whisper in his ear, then continues, “He’s not really talking to any of us. We’re not sure why.” “Oh,” TK says, unsure if that makes him feel better or not. “He looks great, at least.” He’s only been back in the gym for a few months, TK knows. The recovery was long and Carlos took some time off afterward, but no one would ever know that from how comfortable he already looks. His transitions are fluid, as if he’s moving through water as he does his skills, and his handstands are perfect. TK’s never seen anyone do them better. Marjan shrugs. “He’s practically lived here for the past couple weeks. Dude doesn’t know when to quit.” That doesn’t feel particularly strange – TK’s had his own fair share of injuries, and after his last one, a strained rotator cuff, he was itching to get back into the gym. The only thing that kept him away was the doctor’s warning that reinjury would put him out of training for much longer than a few weeks. He knew he’d have his work cut out for him once he was cleared. Marjan adjusts the strap on one of her grips and nods over to the bars. “Could you spot me?” He smiles and nods, and then lets her lead him over to the chalk bucket sitting a few feet away from the bars. She starts chalking up her grips, and TK turns, as if an invisible force is pulling his focus, back to the high bar, where Carlos is swinging once again.

no pressure tagging @bonheur-cafe @lightningboltreader @reyesstrand @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut @louis-ii-reyes-strand and anyone else who wants to share!

#i have not looked into whether men and women can train together and honestly i will not we are suspending disbelief #apologies to any gymnasts out there this will not be very accurate that is a promise #olympics au #tarlos #911 lone star #wip wednesday #neha writes

[gmariam19]

I once started a post-TROS story where Finn and Poe went to a very intolerant planet to negotiate a treaty, but they were rejected and sent away because the ambassador assumed they were a couple. I thought it was interesting to explore, that a galaxy as big as theirs can't possibly be all friendly and accepting. How does one create a galactic alliance with so many different species with so many different beliefs? I don't know, and the story got stuck. In part because I wasn't sure how Poe would feel about it--would he understand the need to still work with them, or would he be too angry to set aside their differences? I'm still not sure. But it was also a way to get Finn and Poe to talk and admit their feelings for each other. I mean, if a bunch of strangers saw it, how could they avoid finally facing it?

I've left off the first part as it was a bit much, and I've made Poe more unsure about how he feels about it, but I still sort of like Finn and Poe's conversation and would like to finish it. So here's the beginning in hopes that sharing it kicks a bolt loose in my brain and I can wrap it up this week. Thanks for reading!

The meeting had been a disaster – he’s been kicked out off plenty of planets, though never as a general - yet it is Finn’s question that stops Poe in his tracks as soon as they walk through the door of their room. "Why aren't we a couple?" Poe feels like he's been kicked in the chest. He steps back, mouth working soundlessly until he finally manages words. "What are you talking about?" Finn shakes his head, waves his hands in that way he has when he’s agitated. "What I said. A bunch of strangers from another planet thought we were together and told us to leave. Half the people we know wonder why we're not and have placed bets on us. So why not?” He's right, and Poe is one of the people who’s wondered the same thing; maybe he should get in on the betting pool. "Is this really the time to talk about this?" he asks instead. "I don't know!" Finn exclaims, throwing his hands up in the air. “I barely know what just happened!” He's clearly frustrated, but Poe is more confused. What is really bothering Finn—the failed negotiations on Allu, or Poe? "Look," Poe says, trying to stay calm even though his heart is pounding in his chest. It's not the time, and definitely not the place. "I think we should probably head out and talk about this somewhere else, once we're not still upset about the negotiations. But you have to believe me, it doesn't bother me that they thought they were together, not one bit. It's…flattering, really, an honor, that they would think…" He stops himself before he goes too far. "That they would see that in our relationship," he finishes. Finn narrows his eyes and points his finger at Poe. "Except for the part about it mortally offending them. Pack up, then. We're not finished." Poe nods, a nervous feeling settling into his gut. He feels like they are about to hit the tipping point, whether they are ready or not, and honestly, Poe's not sure he’s ready. He's known Finn for over a year and known for months that he has feelings for the other man. He's not nervous or ashamed of them; though his serious relationships have been very limited, they've involved both men and women. He's…cautious. Worried. And maybe more than a little scared. It’s the depth of his feelings for Finn that scares him. Finn has an amazing future—he's already started some Jedi training—and it will, inevitably, pull him away from Poe one day. The old Jedi didn't have relationships, and Poe doesn't want to hold Finn back. If Finn even felt the same way, which most of the time Poe has no idea. Sometimes there's a spark, a moment, and he thinks Finn might feel the same, but most of the time…most of the time they are friends. Best friends, and co-generals. And Poe is not sure what Finn might want from life, what growing up as a Stormtrooper has given him in terms of how Finn sees things like sex, relationships, family. The few times they've talked about it, in general terms, Finn admitted he’s not sure what he wants, what’ss normal, what’s even possible in a galaxy that is free. Poe has always tried to let Finn figure things out for himself, and would never pressure him to do something, or be someone, that he wasn't. So they pack quickly and leave, and the tension is thick, though Poe still isn't sure where it's coming from: their failure with the negotiations on Allu, or something more personal. Maybe a little bit of both. He can't help but feel like he's let Finn down in some way, and half dreads the conversation they need to have. He dreads it so much he suddenly wants to get it over with, and starts with an apology.

#finnpoe #poe dameron #finn #stormpilot #star wars

[iliveiloveiwrite]

travel books and romance novels // Colin Bridgerton

Summary: Colin visits the library for research into his next trip; he didn’t expect to find you.

A/N: Colin’s desire to travel honestly reflects my own. For purposes of the fic, I have aged Colin up - it’s more to fit the plot line of Book Four which is his book anyway. I’m not sure how to feel about this fic, I'm happy with it but I’m not at the same time. I’m not being too harsh on myself however, this is my first time writing for Colin and I haven't got to grips with his character yet. I hope you all like!! <3

Pairing: Colin Bridgerton x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Colin is very cute, pining, mutual pining, strangers to friends to lovers, female reader, she/her pronouns, marriage proposal, happy ending.

Word count: 4k

Colin Bridgerton had spent over two decades of his life on this planet and had yet to find something or someone he loves more than travelling. The bug first bit him in his early twenties; desperate to experience a Grand Tour – a tradition of which that had strongly died out in the past century. He had read about it so often; dreamed of it nearly every day that eventually he put the idea forward to Anthony and his mother, Violet.

Though Violet was apprehensive at first, she warmed up to the idea once Colin gave her permission to choose some of the countries he would visit. Anthony held no qualms; having travelled to France and Spain before tragedy forced the family title upon his shoulders. Being able to travel would forge Colin into the man he should be; it would give him experience, and plenty of stories to tell his children and then eventually, their children.

Upon arriving back in London after his second trip away, Colin found himself glad to be home. He had sorely missed the sounds and smells that accompany London; the clipping of horses hooves and the constant chit-chat of men and women. It was home; it would always be home.

However, as he stepped off the boat or the train, Colin always wondered the same thing. How long would it be until he craved adventure once more?

------------

A month.

Colin lasted a month in the company of his beloved family before he was desperate to head off on his next adventure. However, he had no clear destination in mind. He had visited Europe, toured the Mediterranean and had hopes of crossing the Atlantic one day soon, but for now - to save his mother’s poor nerves - was content to remain closer to home.

He wasn’t one to visit libraries himself, usually sending a list of books with a servant whenever they visited the place, but this time he fancied the walk to stretch his legs. He had decided that research was the best way forward into finding his next destination, his next adventure. The library could offer such a thing.

It truly was a thing of wonder; so many books and serial publications at home in one place. The library at Bridgerton House was well stocked and Colin knew he could walk in freely and take whatever he would need, but there was something attractive about going out to find exactly what you need. There was also the added bonus of a lack of interrogation from his much-loved mother.

A huff leaves his body as Colin is pitched forward; barely catching himself before knocking into one of the shelves. Turning, Colin readies the words he wants to fling at the person who had yet they die in his throat when he finds you standing behind him with an apologetic look on your face, close to tears.

“Mr. Bridgerton!” You gasp, bowing your head politely and in apology, “I hadn’t meant to walk into you.”

Colin smiles, brushing down his suit jacket, “It’s no worry, Miss (Y/L/N). No harm done.”

“I hope not,” You reply, biting your lip.

His smile grows wider at the note of concern in your voice. “Truly, Miss (Y/L/N), no harm done.”

“Nevertheless, I apologise.”

“What are you reading?” He asks, nodding at the two books in your hand, changing the subject.

“They’re romances,” You admit shyly, “I read to my aunt twice a week. She rather enjoys them.”

“And you? Do you enjoy them?”

“There are some that I enjoy, yes, but I prefer books with adventures if I’m being honest.”

“Adventures?”

You nod, “I like them very much. What do you read?”

Colin frowns; confused at the question. You gesture to the shelves of books surrounding you, “What do you like to read, Mr. Bridgerton? We are in a library after all.”

“Non-fiction,” He replies, nodding his head to the stack dedicated to true life accounts of travellers. “I’m here doing research.”

“Research?”

“For where I want to travel to next,” Colin clarifies; walking towards the stack, all the while knowing you’re following.

“Have you an idea?”

He shakes his head; disappointed at the admission. For his last two trips abroad, he had known exactly where he wanted to go and what he wanted to do and see. Now, however, he was struggling for ideas.

You nod your head; seemingly understanding the predicament Colin has found himself in. Holding close the hardcover editions of the romances your aunt loved so much, you take a step back from the third eldest Bridgerton.

“I hope you find your location soon, Mr. Bridgerton,” You murmur in farewell, turning away from the tall brunette.

“I hope you enjoy your romances,” Colin replies, watching you walk away. Fleetingly, he wonders if he will see you again.

------------

The library remains just as silent as the last time Colin visited. The books he had borrowed heavy in his hands as he returns them to the attendant who nods in thanks. Distantly, he wonder whether he will run into you again. Since meeting you last, he hadn’t stopped thinking about you.

Colin barely knew you or your family; didn’t know much about your lineage or even whether you knew of his, yet he had not stopped thinking about you and the way you held your books so close to your chest, as if protective of them and what they held even if you didn’t own them. He couldn’t explain the urge he had to get to know you. Colin felt certain that if he wasn’t to see you in the next day or so he was to go mad from the unknown.

Luckily for his sanity, he spies a familiar head of hair amongst the shelves, and he cannot help the surge of happiness that runs through him when he recognises you reading the spines of the books. “Miss (Y/L/N)!” Colin calls out in greeting; rushing over to you.

“Mr. Bridgerton,” You smile, “How have you been? Have you decided on your next destination?”

“I have not though I’ll think of something soon.”

“I look forward to finding out. I’m sure Lady Whistledown will report on it.”

“I’m sure she will,” He drawls; his contempt for the author of the gossip sheet well known amongst family and friends. “How did the romances go down with your aunt? Did she enjoy them?”

Nodding your head, you explain, “Very much so. She usually stays awake for a chapter or two before falling asleep, but this time she stayed awake for close to five. I’m here looking for more books by the same author.”

“Would you like some help?”

“Only if you aren’t too busy. I wouldn’t want to pull you away from something more important.”

Colin shakes his head. “I would be happy to help.”

It takes the better part of an hour. Colin proving to be a distraction to your thoughts as you trawl through the shelves in the library. His very presence throws your mind into overdrive; overthinking his intentions for helping you, but also noticing just how handsome he truly is.

“I think we have enough for now,” You eventually comment, finding it hard to keep the sadness out of your voice as you realise that your time with the Bridgerton is up.

“Are three books enough?” Colin asks warily, as if he doesn’t want the time spent together to end either.

Sighing, you nod, “It’s enough to keep her occupied for a while. It takes us a few weeks to get through one book with me visiting her only twice a week.”

Colin nods understandingly, “Then the other romance novels must be for you.”

You raise an eyebrow, “I much prefer adventure novels though I did tell you that the first time we had met. Though I suppose I didn’t make that much of an impression.”

“I can assure you; you did. I just couldn’t help but notice that you must read far quicker than your aunt so surely you must read the other books you have borrowed.”

Caught out, you avert your gaze back to the books in your hand. Colin tries not to smile in triumph but fails miserably. “How often do you come here?” Colin asks, “Do you borrow books for your aunt alone, or do you read to another relative?”

Pursing your lips, you think over your answer. “I only read to my aunt and I suppose I come here at least once a week, usually on a Wednesday.”

Colin nods, “I shall see you next Wednesday then.”

Watching the Bridgerton walk away from you, you cannot help but wonder what exactly you had gotten yourself into.

-------------

The friendship that develops with Colin Bridgerton felt entirely natural; as if at some point in your lives your paths were always meant to cross, and a friendship was to begin. Colin finds you in and amongst the stacks of books the following week; a triumphant grin on his lips and his eyes bright with happiness when he finds you once again in the romance aisle.

He starts to offer you suggestions of books to read, meeting you at the library week after week; all the whole continuing his research into where he wants to travel next. He hasn’t settled on a destination, yet he comes to realise that this is the longest he has remained in London in years. Usually, Colin would return home, manage a month with his family before taking off again. A routine his mother has come to despise despite offering her blessing for every trip.

Weeks continue to pass and whilst his family know that Colin has become infatuated with someone, he isn’t ready to share you with them yet. He isn’t ready for the inspecting glances and interrogations from his mother, brothers, and sisters. For now, Colin was more than content to share you with the romance books you swear you don’t love as much as you truly do.

------------

The café is busy and getting busier from a lunch rush when Colin sits down across from you. His hair remains a mess despite how often he runs his hands through it in an attempt to flatten it; his eyes are bright as he smiles widely at you.

“I thought you were going to be late,” You admonish, but there’s no heat behind it.

Colin takes a sip of his tea, “I could never be late, not for you.”

“You’re a flatterer.”

“And you’re a romance fan, no matter how many times you try to deny it. Tell me, what are you reading right now?”

You purse your lips, deciding whether to relay the information to him, but the longer you wait, the larger his smile gets. “Definitely not those novels,” You comment, “There is romance in my latest book, but I am reading it for the adventure. It has pirates if you must know, very adventurous.”

Colin laughs, reaching for one of the small cakes on the stand.

“I don’t know how I stand your company,” You complain, trying your best to calm your stomach long enough for you to enjoy the food on your plate. The butterflies raging there were making it rather hard.

“You like me, that’s why.”

“I suppose that is more judgement on me than it is you.”

Colin’s only answer is to wink before returning his attention to the food on his plate. For a while, it is silent between the two of you. happy smiles are exchanged between you both and quiet laughter when you both reach for the same cake; Colin, ever so gracious, lets you have the cake. Instead, he tops up his tea and then yours from the teapot.

“I would like to visit Russia next; I think – St. Petersburg,” Colin declares, breaking the silence once and for all.

“Truly? You would travel so far?” You ask, eyes wandering to the globe on the table in the corner of the room, a display item. Centred on England, Russia could not be seen for the distance between them.

“I’d travel to all four corners of the earth if I could,” Colin admits, voice honest.

You sit back in your chair, eyes wide with wonder at the prospect of travelling even outside the county without a chaperone. “I’d love to travel.”

“It is a marvel,” Colin smiles, thinking back to his trips through Europe and the Mediterranean.

“The only chance I’ll get to travel is on my honeymoon which will be a marvel in itself,” You reply, picking at an invisible thread on your skirts.

“Why?”

You sigh, “Mother doesn’t hold much hope for my marrying. She believes that I have been out for too many seasons and have nothing left to offer that could possibly entice a man into courting me, never mind proposing.”

Colin finds himself gripping the arm of his chair in an attempt to keep his anger at bay. Such words leaving your mouth should be a crime. You have plenty to offer. However, at the sight of your slumped shoulders and sad eyes, Colin realises that you believe the words of your mother; that you truly have nothing left to offer.

On a whim, Colin asks, “Are you attending the Duchess of Hasting’s ball tonight?”

Shaking your head, you explain, “Mother isn’t one for huge events no matter the title of its holder.”

Colin surges forward, grasping your gloved hand, “Come, please. My sister won’t mind. I’ll have her add you to the guest list and send a carriage for you.”

You remain silent as you think over his proposition, ready to turn him down and return to your life of safety but the determination in his eyes and the joy in his smile leaves you nodding your head instead.

“Alright,” You agree, “I shall wait for you carriage.”

------------

The London home of the Duke and Duchess of Hastings could only be described as grand. Candles line the way to courtyard in which the ball would be held; they provide a romantic atmosphere, providing many a dark corner where young couples could sneak away from their chaperones.

Upon your announcement, you find yourself walking through the large crowd of people, unwittingly searching for the familiar head of brown hair. He finds you first, however, smiling widely as he notices you in the crowd.

Colin excuses himself from his conversation; making his way over to you as fast as he can without bringing too much attention to himself.

“You came,” Colin breathes as if in disbelief that you stand before him. His eyes run over you; taking it all in as his heart races. He hasn’t felt like this before; he hasn’t ever known anyone to make him feel like this. Colin feels as if he wants to show you everything, introduce you to everyone, but also keep you for himself should anyone want to steal you away.

“I said I would,” You smile, heated from his attention.

“You look beautiful,” Colin states truthfully.

“Thank you,” You answer, “You look very handsome too.”

“Would you care to dance?” Colin asks, a hand outstretched and waiting.

Smiling, you nod your acceptance. You take his offered hand, letting him leads you to the dancefloor where many other couples are readying themselves for the opening notes of the dance. Out of the corner of your eye, you spy Anthony’s eldest brother getting ready to dance with his wife, Kate. He offers Colin a smile and a nod to which Colin’s shoulders relax somewhat. You raise an eyebrow at the brunette only for Colin to shake his head; nothing you need to worry about.

Colin’s hands find themselves in the correct position son your body as you reach for his free hand, resting your hand on his shoulder. The music soon starts up and Colin begins to lead you round the dancefloor in a flurry of spins that leaves you giggling. His face lights up at the sound of your laughter, soon finding himself joining in.

“Stay for one more dance?” He asks as the music dies and you pull away, desperate not to let go of you just yet, happy enough right now to feel your hand in his and your body pressed so close.

“I’d love to,” You answer honestly, letting yourself be pulled back to the dancefloor where Colins hands soon start to feel like home on your body.

By the end of the second dance, you begin to feel dizzy from the spinning. Smiling gratefully at Colin, you apologise for having to bow out. He dismisses your apology with a wave of his hand, “Shall we get a drink? I’m sure I saw some lemonade not too long ago.”

“Lemonade sounds perfect. I seem to have worked up quite a thirst.”

“Then by all means,” Colin declares, bowing dramatically at the waist, “We must get the lady a drink.”

Laughing softly, you follow Colin to the drinks table where he hands you a small glass of the cold drink. He goes to take a drink from his own glass but is distracted by his mother calling his name. Colin apologises before leaving you in the company of his sisters, Eloise and Hyacinth.

“Good evening, mother,” Colin greets, dropping his head to kiss her on her cheek.

“Two dances in a row?” She asks as greeting, curious to know just who has distracted her son in this manner.

Colin ducks his head; not ashamed to have been caught out in his feelings, but ashamed that he hasn’t introduced you to his family as of yet. Across the room, despite the music, he hears your laughter. His attention rests on you as he watches you laugh at something said by either Eloise or Hyacinth. Your smile is wide as you try to cover it with your hand; trying to be polite but neither sister care that much as they continue to make you laugh.

You’re beautiful, he realises. He’s known it all along, of course, but with that smile on your face, Colin cannot help but desire to be the one who brings such a smile to life. He wants to be the cause of your smiles and your laughter; the reasons why your eyes crinkle in the corner. He wants it all; he wants it with you.

“I think you know why you haven’t set off on another adventure,” Violet states pointedly; eyes dancing between her son and where you stand, talking to Eloise and Hyacinth. A mother always knows.

Colin’s eyes don’t need to follow his mother’s; they had been on you since you excused yourself from him. He’s finally ready to confront what he had known along. “I think I know too. Do you approve?” He asks; realising he sounds like a child desperate for his mother’s attention.

Violet Bridgerton smiles, brushing Colin’s cheek softly with a gloved hand. “I think you suit each other perfectly.”

The smile that breaks over Colin’s face could only be described as blinding as he takes his mother’s hand from his face, kissing the back of it before leaning in to kiss her cheek. Against her cheek, he whispers, “Thank you, mother.”

Violet nods, eyes lined with tears as she watches her third eldest son walk away from her. She would be the first to admit how well suited you both are; the need for adventure alive in the both of you. She shakes her head fondly as she watches her son make his way over to you; holding out his hand, asking you to dance to which you graciously accept.

Violet begins to walk the outskirts of the ballroom; feeling nothing but pride and happiness for each one of her children and elated in the knowledge that there was soon to be another marriage in the Bridgerton household.

-----------

The morning after the ball is a pleasant one. The weather wonderfully warm as the sun shines through the windows; heating the drawing room pleasantly. Turning your face, you take in the rays, careful not to risk too much exposure.

Your latest read remains open on your lap as you continue to bask in the warmth of the sun. So far, the book has captured your attention and has failed to let it go. The heroine of the novel too relatable personality wise for you to take a break long enough. At this point in the novel, she had offered an ultimatum to her suitor – he can join her on her next escapade, or he can find another woman to marry. You could only hope he would join her in her next adventure; their comradery was too perfect to end so suddenly.

However, after the events of last night, you found it hard to focus on the book long enough to turn the page. Instead, you found yourself reading the same line over and over again, desperately trying to lose yourself in the witty prose of the author.

But your mind focused on last night: the music, the dancing, the company. It had been a dream; it felt like a dream – only your mind could cook something up so perfect, yet deep down you knew you had experienced every second. You were certain you were still dizzy from the spins you had taken when dancing with Colin.

Biting your lip, you think back to the three dances you had shared with the third eldest Bridgerton. Three dances – could it be true? Shaking your head, you answer your own question. It was true; you remember every moment with crystal clarity. Three dances with Colin had to mean something; it had to mean he felt something for you. Your heart begins to race as you think of the possibilities

“Miss,” Your Butler states, interrupting your daydreaming, “A Mr. Colin Bridgerton is here to call on you.”

“Show him in,” You answer, standing from your window seat, brushing down the skirts of you dress. Biting your lip, you could only hope that you looked presentable.

“(Y/N),” Colin greets as he enters the room, a large smile on his face. A bouquet of red roses and lady’s breath in his hand that he offers to you.

“They’re beautiful, Colin. Thank you,” You whisper, eyes darting around the room for a vase. They would be put in there after Colin had left.

“I’m glad you think so.”

“What did I do to deserve flowers though?” You ask, a teasing note in your voice.

Colin smiles, “I know where I want to travel to next. I came to tell you.”

A pang of disappointment rushes through your body soon followed by upset. Placing the flowers on the nearest table, you do what you can to avoid his gaze as you ask, “When do you leave?”

“That’s the thing,” He starts, shifting nervously, “I have something to ask of you before.”

“What?”

“Travel with me. Come with me,” He all but pleads, reaching for your hand, “As my wife.”

Your eyes widen as Colin’s grip on your hand tightens. “What?” You question, breath coming in a hurry. “What are you asking me, Colin?”

“I’m asking you to marry me so we can travel together. I’ve seen the world once; I want to see it again with you.”

“I have to admit this isn’t what I expected today,” You ramble, trying your best to not look into his eyes. The moment you do, you’re done for.

“(Y/N)…” Colin interrupts, cutting off your nervous rambling. “I need to know an answer, love.”

It’s only then that you let yourself look into his blue eyes; reading the emotions written over his face. He was promising you adventure; the likes of which you had only read in books. Colin was promising you a future full of love and laughter; a dream you had hoped for since you were a young child.

Suddenly, as you look into his blue, blue eyes, it’s all clear.

“Yes,” You whisper, somewhat breathless but entirely ready to begin your future with the man in front of you, “Let’s see the world together.”

********

Bridgerton Taglist: @heloisedaphnebrightmore @dreaming-about-fanfictions @now-its-time-for-a-breakdown @janelongxox @aspiringsloth20 @wallwriterstuff​

#colin bridgerton x reader #colin x reader #bridgerton fanfiction #bridgerton #colin bridgerton #colin bridgerton imagines #colin bridgerton imagine

[hops-hunny]

What’s in a Name?

Pairing: Blaise Zabini x Chubby!Reader

Pronouns: She/Her

Word Count: 3.6k

Request: N/A

Summary: When two beautiful people fall in love, everything can go right. Or, the one where Blaise gets the girl of his dreams.

Warnings: None?? Mentions of past self hate, positive use of the word fat.

A/N: I had so much fun writing this. Enjoy!

Fat. It was a word (Y/n) had thrown at her from a young age but had grown to become neutral with as she got older. See, the (y/h/h) was fortunate enough to grow up in a household with her dear aunt Marlene who brought her up on the principle that ‘fat and ugly were not synonymous’ which she found herself quite fortunate of. You see, Marlene herself was an extravagant woman. She never stepped out of the house unless she was runway ready, long acrylic nails, hair curled in the prettiest of waves, and a face of makeup that could put anyone to shame. Marlene found her niece to be reminiscent of herself when she was younger. But, she also knew no matter the great example she showed her and the encouragement she’d give her, the world around her would affect the way she viewed herself until she reached a certain age.

However luckily for (Y/n), that age was when she hit the ripe age of 14. She was sick of it. Sick of feeling like a prisoner of her own body. Sick of hiding from mirrors, sick of wearing clothes that fit her like potato sacks just to hide the figure that she was naturally born with. Why should she have to feel bad because the world wasn’t ready to accept her for who she was? Why should she have to hide away due to a bit of extra weight and fat? So, after a long night of crying she decided from that day forward she would do her absolute best to at least accept her body for what it was. She didn’t wanna skip meals anymore just to make everyone around her comfortable. She didn’t want to avoid clothes that made her figure less of a figure. She wanted to live and be free in the body she was currently in.

If she could go back to where she was when she was 14, she’d tell herself she had exceeded that limitation. She was far beyond just accepting herself for who she was, she loved who she was. (Y/n) found herself falling in love with a new thing about herself every time she found herself blessed with the fortune of time to look in a mirror. Whether it was the way the rolls of her back reminded her of the ocean or the bumps and lumps around her hip area that were reminiscent of clouds, she loved every bit of herself. Even though it took her time to get there, she didn't regret it one bit.

Her confidence and demeanor attracted a lot of positive attention wherever she went. Her friends adored her and so did many other people around the castle! There was always a few wronguns here and there but that goes without saying. Even if you change your outlook on life, in a society where fat is a sin there will always be your self proclaimed saints. The more popular opinion shared throughout the castle though was ‘if she could find love in herself, why shouldn’t I be able to as well?’. Although it’s hard for one girl to change the world, she came quite close to it, always offering a shoulder to anyone in need and a helpful word of advice to anyone on the path of self acceptance and love.

There was one person who noticed her much more than that. Some would say it was a crush but no, it went quite deeper than that. He found himself being absolutely enamored by her. Her confidence, her positivity, her ever radiant beauty. All those things he found to be addicting, entrancing. Never had he come across a woman of any sorts who was so sure of herself, so proud to be in the skin she was born in. (Y/n) knew who she was and honestly? It was fucking hot. Blaise Zabini wasn’t one to make wild claims which is why when he thought about how he felt, he was very sure of the feeling. He absolutely adored the goddess that was (Y/n) (L/n). So why was it so hard to say it to her?

The way she made him feel had him in a whirlwind of emotions. A lot of the times, he was infuriated. Not by the way she made him feel, but the way she made him act. Blaise was always a hit with women from all houses around hogwarts. Why wouldn’t he be? When you’re a tall, dark, and handsome man with oodles of charismatic charm and yes, a fat load of cash, who wouldn’t wanna be yours? He could have any woman he wanted wrapped around his finger before he even opened his mouth. But around her, around her? His mouth would close as soon as it opened. He’d feel a rush of heat move to his face and his ears would start ringing. What was this feeling? This feeling that made him act so idiotic. This feeling that had him awake late at night, wondering what it would be like if he only said-

“Hi.” his head snapped up at the sound of a familiar warm voice. The same voice that made his heart race wildly, the same voice that made him act like one of those stupid fucking Hufflepuffs. All nerves and scurrying to find something, anything to say. There she was right in front of him, looking uncharacteristically shy. She had her arms behind her back one hand gripping at her other wrist as she looked up at him through thick lashes. “Have I wronged you in any way?”

“Hm?” he hummed out, still dazed as he looked down at her with a soft look present on his face. He cleared his throat slightly, pulling at the collar of his shirt that was suddenly too tight. Too constricting, too-

“Have I wronged you? I always see you staring at me quite a bit.” she repeated, gaining her confidence back some. God was he always this bloody gorgeous? Well, to her he was. She had her eye on him ever since she’d ran into him on the train back in first year. “I know I’m quite pretty, but I don’t think your girlfriend would appreciate that. No?” she questioned, taking a step closer to him. She felt her hands grow sweaty at the smell of his aftershave, a sharp smell in comparison to her own strawberry body mist.

Was she flirting with him? He couldn’t tell. Why couldn’t he tell? He always could tell. Many upon many times he found himself rejecting women before they could even get the chance to confess how they felt. So why now, why with her could he not? Was this- was this nerves? “My girlfriend wouldn’t appreciate that. I-I mean I don’t have a girlfriend!” he stumbled out, cursing under his breath slightly. He felt himself grow quite warm as he heard her giggle. He looked up at the sound once more wishing he hadn’t. She looked radiant in the glow of the late evening sun. Her round cheeks prominent as her face turned up in a smile before she quirked a brow at him.

“Ah I see then. You don’t have a girlfriend but you were staring?” she questioned, feeling a bit guilty about how she was enjoying the usually calm and collected boy lose his composure. His face fell straight before processing what she said. (Y/n) could see a whirlwind of emotions happen behind his eyes in such a short period of time. ‘Isn’t it funny that only a few years prior this would have been me? I can’t wait to tell Rose-Marie about this later.’

“I-I.. you know what? Yeah I do stare at you quite a bit. More often than not, I find myself staring at you.” he closed the distance between them, her soft frame pressing against his tone one. He lifted two of his fingers up to her chin, lifting her head softly. “How could I not? You’re an absolute work of art. Only the most worthy of men should be able to gaze at such a rare beauty and I find myself to be very worthy.” he whispered softly, his dark umber eyes staring into the (h/c) haired girl’s (e/c) ones.

It */was crazy how with such few words, he could make her feel so breathless, so woozy. Was she awake right now? The moment she had been waiting for since first year was currently right in front of her. The years spent dreaming, pining from a distance all gone in a few words. She smiled up at him, placing a soft hand on the man’s toned chest. Even through his clothes she could feel that he had a nice build to him. “I suppose you’re worthy. I mean look at us, we’re both beautiful. Imagine the gallery of art we’d be together.” she said, confident in her words as she bat her eyelashes. (Y/n) would be damned if she was the only one left breathless and flustered after this exchange.

“Well, why imagine dear? I’ll be taking you to Hogsmeade this weekend.” He said, turning around as he began to walk off. She was stunned. Was this the infamous charm she had heard him having? As much as (Y/n) had heard about how charming and suave Blaise was, she had never heard of him asking anyone out for a date. Knowing this gave her her own boost of confidence.

“You will be? What makes you so sure I’ll be there?” Blaise froze, turning his head back at the girl’s teasing words. He smirked. She really was something else.

“Oh I know. I wasn’t the only one staring all this time, I saw you too.” he winked laughing some before turning around walking off. (Y/n) felt herself smiling some as she shook her head before her eyes widened.

“Wait, what am I gonna wear?!”

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There was exactly 30 minutes until Blaise was meant to arrive and (Y/n) was nowhere near ready yet. See, she had planned on being ready early, even going as far as to get up at the time she usually did for class. However, after an impromptu dance session in her underwear her luck had run out. She wasn’t completely unprepared though, her hair had been done the night before and her makeup not taking much time, the main cause of concern was her outfit. 

The problem wasn’t a lack of clothes, it was quite the opposite. She had so many clothes that she had absolutely no idea of what to wear! She frustratedly slammed her fist on the pile of clothes in front of her letting out a few choice words. In a moment of defeat, she looked up at her empty wardrobe- wait a second. (Y/n) quickly scrambled to her wardrobe, slipping and sliding on the sea of clothes that lined the way before quickly yanking out the clothes covered hanger. On the hanger was a two piece set.

 The top was a wisteria purple crop top with puffy short sleeves, the skirt the same exact shade with a ruffle hem. “This is perfect! Where did this come from?” she said, checking herself out in the mirror. The outfit clung to her plush body, every curve visible and apparent. The girl smiled, smoothing her hand over the outline of her stomach that was apparent through her skirt. Years ago she would’ve been bothered by the entire concept of the outfit but now the outline of her figure made her smile like an old friend. She quickly put on a pair of white chunky sneakers, accessorizing the outfit with a few necklaces and rings as well just in time to hear a knock on the door. She did another once over in the mirror before quickly running to the door pulling it open to reveal Blaise standing there. She felt her face grow warm at his appearance.

He wore a form fitting maroon sweatshirt that he had rolled up to his elbows, a pair of jeans that weren’t skinny but fit to his figure in the most flattering of ways, and a pair of expensive shoes from some brand she couldn’t even begin to try and pronounce. In his hands were a bouquet of flowers composed of forget me nots, baby’s breath, and daisies. Blaise was in awe. He had seen her outside of her uniform a plethora of times but knowing that she had dressed up so nicely just to go on a date with him made his heart soar. “Wow, you look breathtaking. Look at you!” he hyped her up, grabbing her hand. He held their entwined fingers above their heads, signaling for her to spin around. “Lovely, absolutely divine. I can’t believe I’m going on a date with a deity.” he said, smile growing more as (Y/n) grew shyer.

“You’re not so bad yourself, Zabini. You look great, maroon is definitely your color.” she gushed, closing the door to her room. She looked down at their still entwined fingers, squeezing his large calloused hand with her small chubby one before bringing her gaze up to his face. Unsurprisingly, he was already looking at her.

“Thank you, dove. Let’s get going shall we? I’ve got a ton I wanna do with you and such a short amount of time. Let’s get to it, shall we?”

“We shall.”

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The first place they arrived at was a building she had seen many times during her visits to Hogsmeade but had never been in. It was an old brick building with a paintbrush on an old rusty sign above it.

“An art store?” she questioned, looking up at him confused but not against his choice. They both walked in, a sound of a bell dinging as they did so. She looked around in awe at the abundance of supplies. The store was sort of stuffy and crowded but that was a part of its charm. Blaise scratched at the back of his neck nervously as he watched her roam around.

“Yeah I don’t know if I mentioned it before but I enjoy doing art in my freetime. I thought I’d take you to one of my favorite places first.” He said, walking up behind her as he placed a hand on her shoulder. “A-and well, everytime I imagined going on a date with you, I always pictured the two of us showing each other our favorite hidden gems. We can leave if you wa-”

“That won’t be necessary. This is really cool and I’ve always wanted to learn more about art! I’m more of a reader and writer myself.” she said, grabbing his hand. Blaise let out a huge breath that he didn’t even know he was holding in in the first place before dragging her off in the direction of his favorite brand of oil paints. The two walked hand in hand, exploring his favorite parts of the store. When he’d see something he used himself or was familiar with, he’d explain it to her, rambling off about it excitedly.

Blaise wasn’t normally the type of guy to speak many words but being around (Y/n) brought out that side of him. It wasn’t that his friends were bad per say, they just weren’t very fond of listening to things that didn’t pertain to them which he was more than fine with. However, it was nice having an outlet to share his interest for once. He loved that she would ask questions about things and even let him talk about his own work. Most girls he talked to never really cared to listen to what he had to say, often spending more time kissing him breathless than listening to the words that flew from his lips. But (Y/n) was very attentive, listening to everything he had to say, eyes full of the same excitement he held.

“Alright, I think I’ve bought everything I’ve needed from here. Your pick, where do you wanna go?” he questioned, grabbing the girl’s hand again as they walked out of the small art store. He offered the old man behind a small smile before turning his attention back to his date. (Y/n) thought about it, humming as she tried to figure out before her eyes lit up.

“I have the perfect place! Come on Blaise, you’re gonna love it.” she exclaimed before taking off down the street, dragging him along with her. He smiled fondly at her letting her lead the way.

“This something I could get used to.” he muttered, trying his best to keep up with her pace.

-----------------------------------

About 10 minutes later, they arrived in front of what looked to be a bookstore. Blaise looked around, swiping his fingers across the dusty books. “Welcome to the place where I spend most of my time when coming to Hogsmeade. It may look like just a bookstore but you’ll see why it's not in just a minute.” she said. Blaise watched as the girl got on her hands and knees and began to crawl making a ‘spspsps’ noise. He was confused, rightfully so but he didn’t question her actions. All of a sudden, a floof of white fur came crawling over to the girl purring as she scratched behind its ears.

 “It’s a cat bookstore! How cool is that? There’s a bunch of these little guys just running around here.” she said, standing up with the kitten in her hands. Blaise’s heart beat wildly at the sight. She looked too cute with the kitten in her hand, holding it gently against her soft chest. He was brought from his thoughts as he felt something brush against his leg. He had to stop himself from losing it at the sight of the little calico cat brushing against his leg.

“Hi there little guy.” he cooed softly, reaching a hand down to pet the cat’s head. The cat jumped up to meet his hand before it could land, nuzzling its fuzzy little head against the boy's head as he purred loudly.

“That’s not the only thing. They also carry some muggle literature too! Don’t tell anyone though, it’s a secret.” she said, placing the kitten down as she began to browse the books on the old wooden shelves. 

“Don’t worry, I won’t.” he promised, eyes never leaving her curvy figure. She looked right at home in the book store, reading the titles like they were old friends. “I’m a bit of a muggle literature fan myself. Ever heard of Shakespear?” he asked. (Y/n) looked at him with wide eyes before nodding. She would’ve never expected that from the man, knowing how against all things muggle related purebloods slytherins were. He walked over to her tilting her head up as he looked into her eyes. “ What’s in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell just as sweet.” he whispered, dragging his thumb along her bottom lip. Her breath hitched slightly as she began to scowl as he walked off laughing some.

“Jerk! That was not funny.” she said, punching him in the arm as she glared up at him.

“Wasn’t supposed to be, love. You just look too cute when you’re nervous!”

---------------------------------------------------

It had been a few weeks since their date and (Y/n) was starting to grow nervous. She and Blaise hadn’t been on another one and it confused her deeply. She had an amazing time on their date, in fact it had been the best one she had ever been on! Did he not feel the same? Maybe he had commitment issues? It couldn’t have been her. No, she had done everything right. She spoke well mannered, bantered back and forth with him, and she looked bloody amazing.

She sighed, opening the door to her dorm. It had been a long week. She threw off her robes before turning to her dresser before gasping. On top of the dresser laid a huge painting surrounded in a beautiful antique golden frame. She hesitantly walked over to it, brushing her fingers along it before looking at the note attached. Opening the wax sealed envelope she began reading the note out loud.

“My dearest rose, how are you? I apologize deeply for my lack of presence. Not being near you for so long deeply hurt me so but it was not in vain. You see, after spending such a lovely time with you that day, I felt extremely inspired. Your beauty deserves to be captured in something far more grand than a simple photograph so I painted you this. I hope to see you soon. To my greatest muse, Blaise Zabini.” she smiled as she read the words, goosebumps going up her arms. Blaise was indeed a talented artist. In photo realistic detail was a large painting of her smiling with the white kitten from before in her hands. She was lost for words. Never had someone done something so amazing for her. “Do I really look this beautiful? Is this how he sees me?” she asked no one in particular.

“It is and you are. You’re absolutely gorgeous.” she jumped at the sound of the deep voice. Turning her head she saw the man she had been thinking of for weeks. Slowly she walked over to him, smiling before wrapping her arms around him hugging him tightly. Blaise froze for a bit, not used to receiving such gentle forms of affection. He pulled back before placing a soft peck on her lips.

“Let me take you out again tomorrow, yeah?” he asked her in a soft tone. She simply nodded before standing on her tiptoes initiating another lovely kiss. Blaise wrapped his arms around her soft waist, bringing her closer to him.

“I really am one lucky bloke.”

#blaise zabini #blaise x reader #blaise x y/n #blaise zabini x reader #blaise zabini x you #blaise zabini x y/n #harry potter imagine #harry potter imagines #plus size reader #chubby reader

[lilxberry]

The Guilt Of A Lover - Natasha Romanoff

Synopsis;

You tend to be quite off-put by other women when you’re with the love of your life, even feeling guilty when there truly is no need to for you to feel so. Natasha herself tells you as such.

Warnings: Lil’ bit of language. Jealous Natasha. Oblivious and paranoid reader. Pretty much it tbh.

Words: 2,072

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Reader

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You sat there, admiring your red headed girlfriend as she took down yet another agent in training. You were always in awe of how he body moved when she was up against an opponent. Plus, you had a great view of her ass right now so were as happy as can be during your break from training. 

Natasha looked at you and sent a cheeky, subtle wink towards you. You grinned at her like a fool. She was in every way the perfect woman for you. She’s the woman 

Just as you stood up and took a final gulp of water from your bottle, ending your break, one of the trainees, a young blonde girl, steeping in front of you, blocking your path.

“Hey, I was wondering if you could train with me and help me out with my stance.” Josie-Jessie-Jade, you hadn’t really cared to remember her name, asked as she played with a strand of her hair, twirling it around her slender, manicured finger. A tell-tale sign of flirting which you hadn’t noticed.

But Natasha did.

The girl had been flirting with you non-stop during the training sessions you helped lead. She had always found an issue which you just so happened to be the only one who could fix it. ‘Not like there’s any other superiors she could ask.’ Natasha thought bitterly as she watched on from the corner of her eye.

“Uh-sure. Why don’t you get into position and I’ll see what needs you’re doing wrong.” You instructed the young girl who giggled as she turned to get back on to the matt.

Once there, she plants her feet atop the cool surface, raising her arms out in front of her and bending her knees ever so slightly, sticking her ass further out than nessicary. 

You sighed heavily through your nose as you witness her positioning. ‘How did this girl even get as far as she has with S.H.I.E.L.D..’ You leisurely walked towards her, noting what she should do to make improvements.

“For starters, your knees are bent too much, that can throw you off balance.” You tap her knees until you’re satisfied with the amount they’re straightened. You proceeded to move her feet so they face a more efficient direction. Lastly, you moved to behind her, ready to correct her flimsy, half-arsed positioning of her arms.

“Your arms should be more bent. Bring your elbows towards your body, this will help you protect yourself.” You gripped her elbows with a gentle but firm grip, pulling them back inwards towards her torso. 

As your arms reach around each side of her, she pushes herself back into you, her back being forced to come into contact with your chest. “Like this?” She feigns innocence as she asks in a sickly-sweet voice, puffing her chest out, making them fall into your line of sight. 

You clear your throat and quickly detach yourself from her, making sure you advert your gaze from her eyes as she turns around. “Yeah, just like that. Keep practicing.” With that, you walk out of the training room hastily, leaving Josie-Jess-Jade confused and frustrated.

Natasha notices your quick departure and frowns, concerned about the one she loves. 

She turns her gaze towards the younger girl, a burning anger in her eyes as she stares for a moment. Natasha swore she would find out what was wrong later. 

Oh boy, she sure did. 

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Natasha had yet to see you all day after training had concluded. She could tell something had upset you and had a possible reason as to why you were so quick to exit the room.

Ever since you two had started dating, you had always been mindful and concerned of your girlfriend, putting her before yourself. She knew that you hated the idea of hurting her or betraying her and whenever you thought you had, you would be over cumbered with guilt and then profusely apologize after some time to scold and punish yourself with horrid thoughts.

For as long as Natasha had known you, you had never betrayed her once. The multiple occasions you’ve said you had done so was purely an overreaction on your part. 

--- flashback ---

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to look at her. You know I’d never look at anyone else in the way I look at you. I’m so, so sorry. Please forgive me.” You spoke as you buried your face into the crook of her neck, holding her tightly, afraid that if you loosened your vice like grip around her waist for a millisecond, she’d leave in an instant. You’re breathing was erratic, clearly panicking about whether she’ll leave you ‘cause of your ‘slip up’.

“Y/N, seriously, you’ve done nothing wrong.” Natasha soothed into your ear, stroking your hair gently. “Just because you happened to look up from your phone the same time as that girl bent down, it doesn’t mean you messed up. It’s not like you were actively looking at her tits baby.” She cooed, trying to add humour into the situation but you clearly felt just as guilty as you did before.

“Babe, the fact that you looked away instantly just shows you not only have respect for me and our relationship, but to other women as well is one of the reasons I love you but please stop feeling guilty for something that’s not worth it.” Natasha continued.

You planted a small kiss upon Natasha’s shoulder before fully raising your head to look down at your girlfriend. “I love you.” You spoke quietly, afraid what would happen if your voice raised even a decibel higher.

Natasha looked into your eyes, still seeing the guilt you hold behind them and sighed. “I love you too, Y/N. Now, how about we finally head down to the living room for movie night?” She smiled as a small smile had broken on to your face also.

“Sure.” You grabbed her hand, interlocking your fingers with her before leaving your shared bedroom and heading to the elevator, ready to wrap your arms around your girlfriend on the couch whilst you and the rest of the Avengers watch Short Circuit.

--- end of flashback ---

Natasha has always loved your honestly and dislike towards disloyalty within relationships but sometimes, she felt as though you sometimes overreacted when someone flirts with you. 

She hates how you beat yourself up when you feel guilty about something you couldn’t have done anything about in a situation you were thrown into unwillingly.

As she walked along the hallways of the compound, she noted Steve, Bucky, Sam and Clint further up in the direction she was headed towards talking. Once Natasha got closer to the quartet of men, she asked of your whereabouts. 

“Last I heard, she was down in the lab, sitting quietly with Bruce and Tony.” Clint had answered his friend. The other three men nodded in agreement.

Natasha smiled in thanks before making her way towards the main lab that usually occupies Tony, Bruce and yourself.

finally reaching the lab, she was about to open the door when she heard the voices of the three of you talking clearly.

“I still feel bad, man. Whether something was on accident or not shouldn’t be an excuse for that.” You said in a solemn, guilt-ridden tone. “What makes you think she’ll say yes to marrying me if I’m constantly looking at other people!”

Natasha’s breath hitches at the mention of marriage. You wanted to marry her. A huge grin made its way on to her face, cheeks nearly splitting at how far her lips had upturned. The rest of your conversation was all but muted to her as she thought of being your wife.

Before the three could continue with their conversation, Natasha had opened the door and alerted you and the science bros of her entrance. She smiled widely towards you whilst you looked like a deer caught in the headlights of an on-coming truck. She paced quickly towards you then surged forward to connect her lips to yours.

Your eyes had widen in shock before quickly closing as you melted into the kiss, responding to the affection with just as much emotion. You held on to her hips with a feather-like touch, as if afraid she’ll break whilst her arms snake their way around your neck, pulling you deeper into her kiss. 

Before either of your lungs could collapse in on their selves from lack of oxygen, you broke apart. She grinned up at you as you looked down at her with a dazed expression embedded into your features. You hadn’t even noticed the pair of scientists leave their lab to give you two some much needed alone time.

“So, you wanna marry me, huh?” Natasha whispered in a playful tone. The blissful and content expression was quickly wiped off of your face as she said that and was quickly replaced with a deep red blush and a look of embarrassment at the fact that you had been caught red handed.

“I-uh-I,yeah, I uh-I’ve been meaning to ask you for a month now but I guessed it was never the right time.” You chuckled and smiled sheepishly down at your girlfriend.

“Or is it because whenever you plan to ask, you “mess up” and have to apologize.” Natasha had added air quotes around mess up as she truly believed that you have never done so once. Obviously, you’d beg to differ.

You looked down guiltily, scared to look the red head in the eye. “I’m sorry. I know I messed up again. She asked for my help and then I just kinda saw them. I’m so sorry. I get if you want to bre-”

You were cut off by Natasha gently pressing her soft lips to yours, them moulding together perfectly. She pulled away just as quickly as she had initiated the kiss and leaned her forehead on yours. “Ask me.” She whispers, eyes searching your own for something neither of you knew truly what for.

“What?”

“Ask me. That is, if you still wan to marry me.”

Realisation quickly crossed your features. It was almost comical how your eyes had widened and your mouth drop open into an ‘O’ as you frantically search your pockets for the velvety box.

Soon enough, you found the cuboid container and grasped it into your hand as you retracted it from your pocket in a tight grip. You dropped down on to one knee and cleared your throat at least 20 times before you attempted to speak. 

“Natasha,” The clearing of your throat had apparently not mattered as your voice had still broken into a higher pitch when you spoke her name. Quickly clearing your throat of the dry lump, you attempted your proposal once again. “Natasha, will you marry me? I did have a whole speech about two papers long but I forgot it, sorry.” Your sheepish smile barely concealed your nervousness as you waited for an answer.

“Yes, Y/N, yes I will marry you.” Natasha spoke as she nodded vigorously. You were stunned for a moment before speedily recomposing yourself and pulled the ring from the box to place upon your now fiancé’s finger. 

After you slipped the simple yet elegantly beautiful ring upon her slender, pale finger, she tugged you up with a huge burst of strength before once again plummeting her lips on to yours, kissing you feverishly, conveying both of your love for each other.

The kiss was soon broke and both your eyes had opened to reveal each others beaming smiles towards their loved one. “I think we should tell the others.” Natasha suggested.

“We already know. congratulations. Now, don’t fuck in my lab.” Tony spoke, soon followed by a scalding from Bruce and congratulations from the rest of the Avengers.

“Maybe we should do Banner and Stark a favour and keep their lab sanitary.” You chucked as you spoke. “There are a million places more comfortable that a lab for those kind of activities.”

“Well then, lead the way.” Natasha spoke with a hint of playfulness.

You smirked and grabbed the back of her thighs, signifying her to jump, which she did so gracefully, wrapping her legs around your torso and your hands move to hold her up by her ass. “Yes ma’am.”

And with that, you left with your fiancé to consummate your engagement with the love of your life, leaving behind the guilt of a non-existent issue.

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Yo I am in love with every female marvel character I swear

My first Natasha fic which I really enjoyed writing

I hope you enjoy

And as always, constructive criticism and requests are welcomed and greatly appreciated :D

#natasha romanoff #natasha x reader #natasha romanoff x #natasha romanoff x reader #x gender neutral reader #gender neutral reader #jealous #jealousy #fluff #marvel #marvel fic #marvel fanfiction #marvel fandom #marvel fluff #mcu #mcu fic #tony stark #bruce banner #steve rogers #clint barton #bucky barnes #sam wilson #the avengers #black widow #black widow x reader #x reader

[lydias--stiles]

the smile you gave me (it’s magic)

juke | meet-cute au | tw: alcohol + annoying men in bars | written for @alexjulies as we have the same headcanons about luke

What Julie Molina was about to do was horribly unfeminist and Flynn would hate her forever, but really, it was all the man’s fault - as usual.

She rejected his advances three times now in the last hour. The bartender gave her a drink on the man’s tab and she sent it back, the man brought it himself (introduced himself as Levi) and she politely declined once more. The third time he asked her to dance and then she fled to the bathroom. Julie wasn’t the biggest partygoer, occasionally joining Flynn for happy hour - like today. Her friend was late however, due to an emergency meeting at a magazine she worked at and Julie had to endure the bar alone. Grave mistake. She should’ve just waited at a McDonalds or something; even if she’d look out of place in her cocktail dress.

im there in 15!! hang in there <3 <3

Julie groaned. Great. Fifteen more minutes in a smelly bathroom stall as women outside were drunkenly crying in front of the mirrors and babbled about their own grievances regarding men. For such a universal problem, she had hoped all men would’ve taken the hint by now.

No, she didn’t want to dance. No, she didn’t want a drink. No, she wouldn’t give her number to someone that kept pushing and coming into her personal space. Levi could fuck off. It was bad enough how he had given her a suggestive once-over like he was deciding whether he wanted brunette or blonde tonight.  

The reminder angered her, pushed her out of the stall with a scowl. Was she really going to let a dumb man (nay: boy) ruin her night before it even started? Her songwriting session with Hayley Williams had gone really well and she deserved to celebrate that! She deserved to end her day on a high note! A quick look in the mirror to assure her make-up hadn’t smudged, she marched out the bathroom back into the dimly lit bar.

Her eyes scanned the room, relieved to not catch Levi close-by. Did he give up and leave? Was he cornering another girl? Whatever. As long as he wasn’t bothering her, she’d be able to breathe and maybe forget about the altercation.

If he did bother her again, she’d use her privilege as a girl and yell at the top of her lungs that he was harassing her. Surely then security would kick him out, right?

Over by the bartop was clamour, two men pulling each other into a laughing embrace as one hauled their backpack over their shoulder as the other dropped it. Changing shifts, Julie noted, halting on the man that had arrived. Well then. The theory that bars only hired attractive people seemed to be correct, the guy straight from a CW show. Mussed up brown hair, sharp features, big eyes, cute smile. A ten out of ten.  

He shrugged his red shacket off, fully black outfit beneath and began washing off discarded glasses. His muscular arms made her throat dry up; he wasn’t attractive, he was hot.

(Oh God. Was she just as bad as Levi, gawking over a stranger? But wasn’t part of his job that girls were supposed to gawk over him? More tips and all that? Julie decided she shouldn’t feel too guilty.)

Her feet moved on their own accord towards the bar, sliding into a leather high stool and wondering what she’d order as she waited for any of the bartenders (him?) to approach her.

Luck was on her side, the new bartender pressing his hands into the counter, brows raised expectantly. “What can I get you?”

Her lips tutted, debating between a margarita and a strawberry mojito. Both were appealing and at a marginally low price. “What’s better?”, she asked. “Margarita or mojito? Honestly.”

He grinned. “Honestly?”

“Yeah.” She crossed her arms atop the counter, a brush away from his hands. “I’ve bartended before. I know you have to lie a little.”

His muscle tee shifted around as he chuckled, slivers of tattoos peeking through on his chest. Her eyes averted, hoping she was a bit more subtle than she felt, and kept them trained on the stacks of whiskey in the glass rack.

His fingers drummed on the wood. “The mojito, then.” Leaning in as if imparting a secret, he added: “We’ve been buying the cheaper tequila. Gotta pay those bills.”

Satisfied at his reply, she gave him a pleased nod. “Okay. A mojito, please.”

He pushed himself off with a click of the tongue, as if he auctioned her something, and turned to grab the ingredients. As he poured the rum into a tall glass, he fell into casual conversation she was all too familiar with.

“You here alone?”

“Waiting on a friend.” Eager to distract herself from the reason why she waiting, and what caused her to wait in a fucking bathroom, she asked: “What’s the tattoo?”

The bartender paused for a beat, as if momentarily forgetting he was inked up, and then tugged his shirt out the way to showcase more skin. Had she not been so curious, she’d focus on the fact that he was defined as hell. The tattoo was a detailed sun with an ocean wave drawn inside. More uncovered: a play and pause button, ‘now or never’, a stick and poke tattoo of a lightning bolt. It was as if she herself doodled onto her skin and then left it there, but it somehow worked. It was personal. Maybe she was also a bit intrigued since he seemed especially interested by music. Granted, it was LA. Everyone was some type of artist with varying degrees of success. Still - she was curious.

“They’re cool,” she complimented, him going back to making her drink with an appreciative grin.

“Thanks.”

“Was the lightning bolt a drunk decision?”, she teased. The only instance someone got a stick and poke tattoo was when they felt chaotic or impulsive.

His grin widened, throwing crushed ice in the glass. “That obvious? Yeah, me and my boys all got one. This whole idea of-” He waved his hands around, trying to find the right words. “-bonding us together for life, I guess.”

Warmth thudded in her chest at his story, endeared by the way his voice became lighter when he talked about his friends. They must be like brothers to him.

As he placed the completed drink in front of her, she contemplated her answer. She’d rather keep talking to him than wait for Flynn in silence. “That’s nice. Having friends like that, it’s special.” Twisting her wrist, she showed her own tattoo. “I got this one when I turned eighteen.”      

They were two, small butterflies dancing on the inside of her forearm. When her mother passed away, she always knew she’d get something to commemorate her. Doodles of butterflies marked her skin in high school, finally becoming permanent when she was allowed to. Knowing everyone inevitably asked about the why, she continued talking.  

“It’s, you know, it’s about metamorphosis and beauty and transcendence and I just-” She caught herself before blabbing her sob story to a stranger. With a chuckle, she muttered: “It’s a reminder that change is good.”

When Julie looked up at him, she was struck by the wonder on his face. He didn’t look as confident as he did before, probably taken aback by her sudden spiritual spiel about butterflies - or by her, in general. The thought let a quiet thrill course through her.  

He snapped out of it, a smirk falling on his lips as his nail chimed against the glass. “It’s on me.”

“Is that a move?” Her head tilted, amused.

“You want me to lie or be honest?” The man leaned across the counter again, much closer this time. “Cool tattoo, by the way.”

She laughed, biting back a silly grin from blooming. This was his job, she reminded herself. Act all cute and get her to buy more drinks so that eventually, her tab would be enormous. It was like winning once at a game of poker and then becoming cocky.

Coy, she ripped her gaze from his and sipped on her drink. She’d let him simmer for a bit.

That was when it happened. Her unfeminist deed that would make Gloria Steinem shudder. Levi, the devil reincarnated, shot her a smug look from the other side of the bar. Swerving past people to the beat of the music, he tried approaching her again.

Julie groaned behind her glass, her good mood instantly shattered once more. Why couldn’t this idiot take a fucking hint?!

“Damn,” bartender mused, “I thought my mojito skills were good.”

The brash words tumbled out at a rapid pace, her need for a solution trumping her pride. “There’s a guy coming onto me right now and you need to help me ward him off. Please.”

He grimaced. “Yeesh. Ex-boyfriend?”

“Worse,” she bit. “A fool.”

A stressed smile pinned itself on her cheeks as Levi sidled beside her, one arm bracketing her left. Her back tensed as she shot a quick, pleading look at the bartender. He zeroed in on Levi, mouth curled downwards.    

“There you are,” Levi grinned. “Thought you left.”

Julie didn’t entertain him anymore. “I’ve told you. I’m not interested.”

He dismissed her. “I see you got yourself a drink? What is it?”

“I’m not interested,” she snapped, eyes flickering once more to the bartender. Was he really not going to help her?

It spurred him into action, his arm reaching over to create a barrier between Levi and her. “Dude, you heard her. Back off.”

Levi snarled. “Can you not? This is between me and her.”

“No, actually,” he exclaimed, blunt. “I’m her boyfriend.”

Her vigilance got her acting swiftly, shifting her expression into a believable nod and placing a hand on his outstretched arm.  

“He is?” Levi was gobsmacked, a hint of anger lacing his voice.

“Yeah,” Julie bit, silently thanking him when he played along and enveloped her hand with his. Her final strike spit his venom right back in his face. “So can you just leave us alone?”

The man rolled his eyes with a scoff, kicking one of the stools and mumbling a string of curses. “Bullshit…”

When he was out of sight again, having stormed off like a petulant child to a shadowy corner, Julie let out breath of relief. “Finally!” Shooting the bartender a bright smile, she kept babbling. “You have no idea how annoying that is. And smart idea - the boyfriend card always works!”

He squeezed her hand, worried. “You sure you’re okay? That was fucked up.”

“Yeah…” She trailed off, the soft touch reminding her of his words from before. Squeezing back, she watched as the pinch between his brows vanished. “I’m okay.”

They kept their stare for a beat, the revolving pop music and excited chatter merely background noise. Neither have let go of their hold on each other. She didn’t want to either; his hand was warm and gentle and a calloused thumb absentmindedly caressed her skin. Levi should learn from this.

Sometimes, a connection just happened.

He let go first, collecting himself into a casual stance that was far more amusing than it should be. Ducking beneath the bar and grabbing a beer, he tapped it against her glass with a cocky nod. “My name’s Luke.”

Julie matched his expression. Luke. Luke, the bartender. It fit him perfectly. “I’m Julie. Are you supposed to be drinking on the clock?”

“I work in a bar,” Luke deadpanned. “It’s expected. And I’m sure Jack can handle it.”

“Why would he have to serve alone?” she inquired teasingly, eyes glimmering with challenge. If there was one thing she loved, it was getting the upper hand in a fun game of flirting.  

He lifted his bottle with a wink. “I’m drinking with you.” A pause, his gaze matching her intensity. Damn. He was a good opponent. “Unless you want me to go?”

She shook her head, took a sip from the mojito and wiggled her brows. “Cheers to warding off annoying men, fake boyfriend.”

“I better get some good karma from this,” he joked. “Cheers!”

(Later that night, she’d realise Flynn never came by. When she asked what happened, Flynn told her she had walked in and saw Julie completely wrapped up in a conversation ‘with that cute bartender’ and left. The joyous announcement that Julie got his number made her friend screech over the phone.

Julie went back to the bar many times. Drinking and talking bled until deep in the night, once till closing time and then he walked her to her apartment. He didn’t resist when she kissed him, his lips kissing back with hunger.

It didn’t take long for the ‘fake’ to be scrapped from that label.)  

🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸🍸

@blush-and-books @willexx @bluefirewrites @ourstarscollided

#as an apology for last night's angst #here's something lighter lmao #juke #jatp fanfiction #julie and the phantoms #otp: i think we make each other better

[b0rista]

— ❝︎ 𝐘𝐎𝐔 & 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐑𝐈𝐎𝐑 𝐓𝐑𝐈𝐎 𝐈𝐍 𝐀 𝐌𝐎𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐍! 𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐁𝐄𝐑 𝐂𝐈𝐓𝐘 𝐀𝐔. ·˚ ༘

♡︎ : the atmosphere i'm going for is frustratingly difficult to describe djjfjg the word "somber" doesn't really do it for me, but it's pretty much these emojis 🌑🌨🎞💸🚬⛓🔭

lowkey just wanted to put this trio & y/n (aka the loml) in a really dark, gloomy, modern metropolis type of place full of cold weather, inner monologues, and cigarettes JFKGK

ALSO my insp was the reiner + annie fanart in the center of the divider i made!! i really wish i knew the artist, but i couldn't find them :(( definitely NOT taking credit, it isn't my art whatsoever. but LOOK AT THEM UGH THE AESTHETIC

to balance things out, i wrote the reader as female! && characters are aged up to their early twenties.

the bunch of you met through your college courses— of course, the three of them had known one another since childhood, but you managed to weasel your way into their close-knit friend group. ever since then, you all share the melancholy city life.

during your guys' campus days, reiner worked for his master's in kinesiology. it isn't that big of a shocker that he aimed for something that pertained to his bulkier build,, mans grows up to be an absolute unit, lmao. wanting to maintain an above average salary, he used his education to earn himself a place in the certified training department. currently, he's a personal trainer of many clients, all of which he does his best to maintain.

bertholdt majored in philosophy, and worked toward his master's degree. with his intelligence, he got it. while all three of you (reiner especially), urged him to pursue non-profit professionalism, praising his skill and all around ability to do so, he lacked the confidence to push for it, and ended up going down another path. currently, he's sticking to the safe road, aiming to become a professor in the very course he excelled in. he's yet to get there, though— right now, he's a professor's assistant. it's less tiring, at least. still, he was capable of becoming something better.

as for annie, she majored in political science. unlike the other two, she worked to obtain a bachelor's degree. with that being said, she attended college for a little longer. eventually, she got her degree, and while she was a little lost after graduation, she made her way into the policy analyst game. she had the writing skills, sOmewhat of the drive, and while she's the youngest worker in her office, she's also the brightest. they're all also terrified of her, she speaks .6 words a day.

of course, what you did is entirely up to you! if you took two or three years to get your degree, you likely graduated alongside the boys. if it took longer, no worries, annie's degree took quite a bit.

now, the four of you are living in the same city, and you're all experiencing that said city's constant mournful, dingy atmosphere. the aesthetic is calming, actually; the weather is never nice, it's a rarity that you ever get an actual glimpse of the sun. no matter the season, so long as it isn't summertime, layers are a must. rainfall is a weekly occurrence, as well as the occasional thunderstorm. the merged stench of coffee grounds and burnt oil linger within the streets of the city, simply adding to the melancholy. basically, the general scenery is dark, cold, wet, and quiet. it's a gloomy place,, definitely comparable to forks, washington, but more of a metropolis than a town.

even with all of that being said, you and your friends have a good time. honestly, if you didn't all have eachother, you'd all probably go mental.

while reiner and bertholdt have their own seperate apartments, you and annie share a place. the rent was cheap, especially once split between two homeowners. two bedrooms, one bathroom, and a single kitchen & living area. it was too good of a deal to pass up. fortunately, you and her are compatible roomates.

with that being said, of course, it's often that the four lounge around at your guys' apartment. bertholdt always makes sure to check in before visiting, while reiner has the sour habit of showing up unannounced. you've both had to deny him a key, despite his pleading. you love him, but not that much.

sometimes, the two of them crash in your living room. typically, it's reiner on the couch while bertholdt takes up the floor, waking up the next morning in whatever flamboyant position he'd folded himself into during the night. every now and then, you and annie forget to head back to your rooms, and you crash right there with them. before you all fall asleep, you're typically all huddled up near the glass doored balcony, allowing the rainfall to serenade the four of you into a deep slumber whilst sitting within the crisp remnants of cigarette smoke and freshly opened liquor.

in a way, it's funny, because you all have a tendency to do that on a work night. just the four of you, sitting in your living room, drinking your alcohol, coating your furniture in the brisk stench of pure, solicited nicotine, watching your very own city drown within the darkening sky's tears as little to zero words are even spoken. when it comes to you and your friends, that's something that can never be contradicted; the quiet. these were how you spent your evenings together, especially after a rough day— silence, smoking, and the most peaceful sorrow imaginable.

of course, when you aren't wallowing in your own self pity, you're known to get drinks together. there's this certain booth in a local pub, it had burnt burgundy seats made out of leather. it's your guys' booth, and whenever you go out for a drink or two, that's where you sit. it's way back in the corner, where none of you can be bothered. one time, a couple of rascals had stolen it, and they refused to move. without a second thought, annie slammed one of those motherfucker's faces into the table. in suite, reiner took care of the other one, yanking him from the collar and kicking him to the floor. you and bertholdt only watched,, you were laughing, poor bert simply dragGed his palm down his face.

hey, at least you got your seats back! absentmindedly, you etched your initials into the bottom of the table with your pen. without a thought, the other three did the same, marking the corner as their own. don't fuck with that table, you'll be slaughtered.

when winter hits, it hits mercilessly. it's insanely aesthetic, seeing your group standing on the side of the busy street, all absolutely layered up in buttoned up winter coats and thickly knitted scarves. because they're both unnecessarily large, you depend on them for warmth every now and then. the amount of times you've buried your face within reiner's side while sitting on the subway during the midst of wintertime is stupid. as for bertholdt, he occasionally takes off his very own coat, draping it over you or annie's shoulders whenever either of you are seen shivering. he doesn't mind getting a cold, so long as you're warm.

speaking of the subway, your city has one. it's a pretty average way to travel, and due to none of you actually owning your own vehicles, it's where you go whenever walking or taking the bus isn't an option. the only one who isn't allowed to ride the subway alone is you. there was instance where on your way home from work, you had a run-in with an unpleasant bystander with the means to hurt you. ever since then, a code has been set where if you want to travel underground, you do it with one of them.

^ one time, you didn't listen, and you went by yourself anyway— unfortunately for you, reiner was boarding the exact same stop as you, and gave you quite the scolding. however, it's only because you're special to him. to all of them.

you and annie are actually closer than you'd imagine. being one of the only female friends she's ever been able to keep, you've grown to be an important figure in her life. of course, she'd never admit that to you, but you know. some nights, the two of you lean against one another on the sofa while black & white reruns play on the television, ultimately sending you both to sleep.

once a week, you have lunch with bertholdt at the university he assists at. you know just how glum the work makes him, and fortunately, you showing up every single sunday with coffee and sandwiches never fails to brighten his day. sometimes, you're the only one that can get him through the week.

bert's crush on annie is still very much a thing, even in this universe. of course, he's older, and for the most part, he's grown out of it. still, he stares. not as much as he once did, but he does. you and reiner only watch from afar, quietly sullen that he'd never quite gotten the guts to act on it.

bertholdt is also the group's umbrella holder. it's constantly raining, and due to his height, he's the one holding the bigass umbrella over the four of your guys' heads. when there isn't an umbrella, you just sort of seek refuse underneath his arms, which he gladly gives you. reiner and annie don't really mind, they get wet. it is a thing where you're all rushing to get out of the rain, the two men shielding the women's hair from the storm with their jackets as they run for shelter.

you all smoke. well, actually, whether or not you smoke cigarettes in this scenario is entirely up to you. if you'd like, ignore this part. anyway, cigarette sharing is a given. while reiner's preferred brand of darts is far more lucrative and more likely to kill him (he's dead inside, it fits), he won't hesitate to snatch a cigarette from in between the tips of your lips, bringing them to his own. it's something all of you do, even bertholdt. sharing is caring, you all say. you tend to do the same thing with wine glasses, or beer bottles.

it's practically gotham city, you're all dead inside grownups, god isn't real.

irllydidn'tlikehowthisturnedout-

#attack on titan #aot #shingeki no kyojin #snk #aot headcanons #aot au #aot scenarios #reiner braun #bertholdt hoover #annie leonhart #aot x reader #attack on titan x reader #modern aot

[white-chalk-sapphomet]

I was wanting to go for a skilled trade (plumber or electrician) but I've been discouraged from like, all sides bc "being trans and trade workers don't mix" 😒 do you have to face a lot of bullshit?

Honestly, it just depends! When I first started out, I was prepared to keep my head down and follow the 'don't ask don't tell' procedure, but when I was delivering my referral from the union to the counselor at my electric company, she was talking about how some guy in the company would look cute in makeup or drag. So out of curiosity, I basically asked if she thought I'd have any issues as a trans woman, or if I'd have an easier time being closeted.

And she started talking to me about one of their older apprentices named Joel. She said he was one of the best hardworking apprentices they had, and for the longest time she never even put together that he was a trans man. He started experiencing some kind of health problems and just stopped coming in one day, but he's still missed and thought well of.

At my school on my first day, I DMed my training instructor and basically asked him "hey, I know you were talking about feeling dignified and respected regardless of background stuff earlier, but do you think I would get harassed to the point of interfering with my studies if I'm out as a trans woman here?" And during break, he pulled me aside to a spare room and said it was up to me and what I was most comfortable doing.

He said that unfortunately there are still quite a handful of shitheads in the industry. But that if anybody in the school ever made that my problem, that he would make it their problem and remove them from the program. He mentioned one trans guy student who was there some years before who had relatively no issues with harassment. And a different student who got homophibic slurs yelled at him. The guy responsible for harassment was promptly kicked out, but the student being defended felt traumatized enough that they wanted to drop out.

And he shared an anecdote about the employee who was helping their family purchase a new vehicle. One day they came in to be helped, and the representatives new name was Cindy.

I would say in these situations, I'm very fortunate that I'm not the very first trans person a lot of these people have met. But in any industry or anywhere I go, I do have to tend to act as though I am gonna be the first point of contact people make with a trans person and inform their impressions about other trans people whether I like it or not.

For me that unfortunately usually means I can't be too sensitive. As long as my dead name isn't used, I put up with wrong pronouns until I'm positive I've earned everybody's respect. Sometimes they'll ask questions about trans stuff and I do my best to explain a concept or dynamic to them. There is unfortunately still a lot of shop talk between men, but I've had to bite my tongue about some things until I have more equal footing.

I haven't felt too inclined to wear makeup to the construction site, but I'll probably wear it to the company Christmas party or out with other coworkers. I work a strong work ethic and learn as much as I can, and they appreciate having me on the team. At the end of the day, they've agreed that I'm one of them and they'll take care of me/have my back and won't let anybody start shit with me either. If I ever did have any issues, I would be able to take it up with HR, or find work elsewhere through the union without too much trouble. Within the IBEW is also the Electrical Workers Minority Caucus (EWMC) which is meant to help provide resources/organize for women, racial minorities, and lgbt workers within the industry.

So I'd like to say that each time we can make a good impression on somebody, these industries do become more inviting to others like us. I would say that regionally things may be different from one place to another. With my city, I wasn't sure what to expect, so I've always been proceeding with caution. But in the trades, hard work/caring about your job really does go a long long way.

#answered #long post

[quazartranslates]

Welcome to the Nightmare Game II - CH23

**This is an edited machine translation. For more information, please [click here]**

[<<< Previous Chapter | Table of Contents | Next Chapter >>>]

-----

Chapter 23: Star Death Reality Show (VI) {cw: discussion of menstruation}

Mark and He Yi were still here!　　

Lara's conclusion greatly surprised everyone, but what she said was justified. Everyone knew that she wasn’t talking nonsense. Even now they could go outside to check and compare the footprints one by one. But there were always people who didn't want to see Lara show off.

"You said they’re still in the house, but where are they?" Janet shot out. "This house is only so big. If they were still here, they should have heard our voices, but there’s no sign of them. Where are they?"

Lara chewed on her lip and whispered, "I don't know."

Janet smiled contemptuously with a look that seemed to say, "That’s all you are".

"Qi Leren, did you find anything before you left?" Xue Jiahui asked suspiciously.

As the last one to see these two people, Qi Leren was unfortunately surrounded by all the contestants. He shook his head solemnly: "Everything was normal at the time."

"Ah, it would be great if we could ask the audience watching from outside. Compared with us, they should already know the situation clearly." Xue Jiahui, a skeptic, smiled bitterly and showed concern. "Well, let's search Annie's house. This place isn’t big, we should find them quickly with so many people."

Annie, who had been silent, suddenly looked up: "Miss Xue, if you want to search my room, please come up with a search warrant. Or do you want to wantonly violate the legal rights of a citizen?"

Janet, like a shark smelling blood, quickly changed her target: "Why? Do you have something to hide here?"

Dr. Lu tugged at Qi Leren's sleeve, curled his lips at him, and mouthed, Look, a catfight!

At this scene, the four women fought for ten minutes around the topic of whether or not to search the room. Janet always stood on the front line of tearing at and quarreled with Annie, one attacking the other's religious beliefs, and the other arguing with her for civil rights; Lara insisted on searching the house to look for the people, and her position was consistent with Janet's, but Janet choked her back rather than helping her, which made her very helpless; Xue Jiahui was anxious to find the people, though she was willing to make peace. She said a few words but couldn't stand the argument when it rose to personal attacks. She closed his mouth silently and showed an anxious expression.

The men present were helpless, obviously not wanting to get involved. It always looked like a loss when you quarreled with women in front of hundreds of millions of spectators. It was expected that if you didn't win the fight, it meant "you can’t even beat a woman". It didn't taste right, so it was better not to go into this muddy water.

Qi Leren didn't try so hard. His ears had been trained by Chen Baiqi for so long. He was now more patient than before, and has learned to observe more and be less impulsive. At the end of the day, he discovered some secret relationships between the NPCs: aside from the obvious tit-for-tat between Lara and Janet, there was Xue Jiahui's vague love for He Yi, Janet's warming to Alex's attitude, the ambiguity between Lara and Francis, and even Mark's unexpected obedience to Annie. Many details weren’t easy to find if one wasn’t looking, but they were revealed by the NPCs’ words, facial expressions, and even body language.

Finally, Du Yue, the young man with a sense of justice, lost his cool: "Stop arguing! What’s important right now is to find them. What can we do without finding them? Qianbei, let's do it!"

With this said, Annie ignored everyone and went straight to search the house.

Qi Leren sighed. Young people nowadays... were really impulsive, but this wasn’t a good idea either.

Annie paused, just wanting to loudly reprimand them, only to suddenly be choked by the dust thrown up as Du Yue lifted a rug. She immediately covered her nose and mouth, coughed, and ran out of the room awkwardly. Janet couldn't stand it either and fled the dusty room again.

Dr. Lu laughed crookedly and gave Du Yue a thumbs up: "Nice work."

Realizing his mistake, Du Yue touched the back of his head, smiled stupidly, and continued to search.

"Are you looking for a basement?" Francis asked.

"Ah... Well, since they’re one in Jing Siyu’s house, maybe there’s one in Annie's house too?" Du Yue said.

"It makes sense. Let's pull up the rugs and look for one," Francis agreed.

"Would they have gone into a basement?" Alex shrugged. "Don't waste your time. Maybe Lara made a mistake."

After that, he went out of the room to see Janet, who was dusting her body and complaining loudly that she didn't have any clothes to change into. Unless she found some clothes hidden in the village, she would have to endure the mess. Alex talked with her about finding supplies later.

Francis and Qi Leren turned the house upside down, and Lara and Xue Jiahui joined in. After an hour passed, every corner of the house was turned over, including the walls, on the ground, and even under the bed. There were no signs of He Yi and Mark, and there was no indication of a basement or hidden room. They had disappeared from the house into thin air.

While turning over the bed, Qi Leren noticed some fresh blood on the pillow where Mark had been lying, and he estimated that it was from a scrape on Mark's injured forehead.

The only thing that made him feel strange was what Dr. Lu found. He found a bandage and bloody cloth in the trash can. The blood on it had dried up and hardened, but it could be seen that there was also relatively fresh blood on it. When he pointed this out, Annie showed a strange smile: "This is something for temporary emergency use."

"Are you injured?" Qi Leren stared at her and watched her expression.

There was a hint of ridicule on Annie's face, and there was a hint of mischief—like a secret pleasure: "No."

"Then where did this blood come from?" Francis asked.

"From me." Annie's mouth curved higher and she watched them with interest, looking malicious. "The endometrial wall sheds and is excreted through the vaginal canal. Usually we call this menstruation."

Dr. Lu shook his hand and bandages and cloth fell to the ground, the word “stunned” clearly written across his face.

Annie's smile became more and more cheerful: "Please don't litter everywhere, pick it up and throw it into the trash can, thank you."

　　……

　　……

　　……

The search ended in failure, and the group of people who found nothing left Annie's house to discuss what to do next. While they were talkative, this discussion was really useless. Annie refused to participate in the next activity on the grounds of period cramps and went back to her room to rest.

Because of Mark and He Yi's disappearance, this group didn’t act separately, but searched the village together in a circle. Dr. Lu also muttered to Qi Leren. He felt that Annie had a problem, and Qi Leren asked him why.

Dr. Lu's expression was strange. After a long time, he said, "...Because I suddenly remembered that period blood shouldn’t coagulate."

“…………”

"Because there are many active enzymes in period blood, it prevents coagulation, so looking back, that should not be from menstruation."

Qi Leren felt that he had gained new knowledge, and the same was true of Du Yue's expression.

However, this was only Dr. Lu's guess. He himself said that he was talking about healthy menstruation. If the endometrial wall sheds off, there would be blood clots and so on. Qi Leren felt that he didn't want to know so much, but he couldn't control Dr. Lu's chattering mouth.

He hoped the audience wouldn’t misunderstand Dr. Lu because of his "knowledge".

After this was said, the few people continued to look for supplies and really found some that were hidden.

Dr. Lu, the EX luck guy, also found two small bags, one of which was given to the Qi Leren, who put a bottle of water and some compressed food in it just in case. Although the item bar meant that he didn’t lack materials at all, it was difficult for him to explain the origin of these things to the ubiquitous cameras. Du Yue, who wasn’t given one of these bags, honestly carried the heaviest backpack, which contained the three’s personal belongings. He worked hard and was stupid, Dr. Lu whispered in Qi Leren’s ears, and he felt that Du Yue was born with a lack of brain cells.

In the afternoon, several people went to visit Jing Siyu again. She was still unconscious, but her breathing was gentle, her heart was beating was normal, and there was no bump on her head. Generally speaking, there shouldn’t be any serious problem, but to be on the safe side she was left in Jing Sixue's house—although it violated the game’s rules of one person:one house, she didn’t care much under the circumstances.

Looking for someone like this was fruitless. The snow on the ground was trampled dirty, and it was slippery and easy to fall. The group of people simply cleaned up, took snow shovels that were unknowably old to clean up the snow in front of their houses, and made several paths leading to the central church that were convenient for walking.

At 8 o'clock in the evening, Qi Leren turned off the floating micro-camera that followed him and walked to Dr. Lu's house. Du Yue had come earlier than him and affectionately called out "qianbei" as soon as he saw him.

"Are the cameras off?" Qi Leren confirmed again.

"Off, but those fixed cameras outside can't be turned off. They’ll be able to tell that you came to me," Dr. Lu said.

"It doesn't matter, as long as our conversation isn’t recorded. After all, what we say will expose the difference between us and the NPCs," Qi Leren said. "What do you think happened today? Where did He Yi and Mark go? "

"I don't know, I also find it very strange," Du Yue said.

"They turned into butterflies and flew away," Dr. Lu said with a lack of seriousness, giving a small laugh.

"Seriously." Qi Leren stared at Dr. Lu and said, "Let's start from the beginning. By now the story has progressed to the point where the monster in Pandora's Box has escaped. I don't know where it’s hidden, what kind of form it has, and what’s special about it. Speaking of this, let's go to the church later. We’ve been working with the others today, so I haven't found a chance to check the stone in the church."

"It doesn't matter if you don't check it. The task prompt said that it had cracked, indicating that it hatched before we could move freely." Dr. Lu was well aware of the nature of this game, and that it wouldn’t give players the chance to stop the plot from starting.

"Say, with your years of experience in playing games, what kind of monster do you think it is?" Qi Leren asked.

Dr. Lu snorted and proudly said: "There are three possibilities. The first one is that the monster is a type of psychological agent, which will make people become mad, hallucinate, and finally make us kill each other. It’s quite common in Japanese games. The second possibility is that the monsters are physical attack types, and they will eat people. The more they eat, the more they need to eat, and then they’ll eat us up one by one. The third possibility is that this monster is parasitic, similar to the monsters in the Alien series. This routine is that it will constantly look for a host, and we still have to die."

Du Yue's handsome face wrinkled as if he had eaten something bitter and he looked hopefully at Qi Leren: "Qianbei, I don't want to die..."

Qi Leren's heart said: ...It's no use looking at me, I'm only a little better than you.

However, he had to keep a mentor-like expression on his face: "Don't worry, this task only has a C-level difficulty, it won't be too hard."

-----

[<<< Previous Chapter | Table of Contents | Next Chapter >>>]

#Welcome to the Nightmare Game #欢迎来到噩梦游戏 #danmei

[dimigex]

New Altered Reality Chapter!

A03 / FF 

I think it’s been like . . two years since I updated this story XD oops. The story is linked at the top if you want the full chapter and/or story. This is only a portion of the new chapter because it’s over 6k words 

"Why don't you go train for a little while? It might take your mind off things." Rin made the suggestion as gentle as possible, ignoring the frustration that seethed just beneath the surface of her calm. She wanted the apartment to herself for a few hours and desperately needed Kakashi to stop fussing over her. Then, she'd be able to relax the way that she was supposed to. The man's constant attention put her on edge.

Since the doctor's appointment four days ago, Kakashi had been acting like a brooding hen. When Rin stood up to get her book from the bedroom, he'd jumped to his feet and offered to go instead. He didn't want her standing long enough to cook or clean, so he'd taken over those duties as well. While Kakashi was decent in the kitchen, he'd kept everything bland and refused to add any salt to the dishes. If the man mentioned her blood pressure one more time, Rin was fairly certain that hers would rise to dangerous levels when she yelled at him.

At Rin's words, Kakashi glanced up from the book in his lap. The man's brow furrowed as he marked his place with a finger. "What if you need something while I'm gone?"

"Then, I'll get it myself," Rin answered. She moderated her tone to placating rather than annoyed. It was more difficult than she expected. "I'm hardly an invalid, you know?"

"The doctor said you needed rest." Kakashi argued for the umpteenth time, as if Rin had forgotten it, as if he would give her a chance to forget it.

Rin held up her hand to stop Kakashi's next arguments before they could form. Slowly, she counted to five under her breath. The idea of laying in bed or on the couch for even one minute longer made her physically ill. She had done everything that she was supposed to: drinking glass after glass of water to keep herself hydrated, keeping the lights dim and the room quiet, resting on her left side whenever possible. There had been a dozen tiny things that might make a difference, or might not.

While that scenario would sound like a dream for some women, to Rin, it was a nightmare. She missed the days when training and missions kept her mind and body racing. When she was in the village, Rin kept herself busy wherever the hospital needed an extra set of hands. She hadn't chosen her specialization yet, but she was leaning toward pediatrics. Most medical nin worked in triage and emergencies, but there were plenty of quiet days as well. Rin liked the idea of helping children feel better rather than focusing on battle injuries.

Rin realized that her mind had drifted from the topic at hand and brought her eyes back to Kakashi. She couldn't help but appreciate the changes in her husband in the past few days, even when they annoyed her. In some ways, he was more like himself and others, he was totally different. Rin could manage the symptoms of her pregnancy; she'd done that when morning sickness left her more or less living on the bathroom floor for two months. But, she couldn't handle the hovering worry that radiated off of Kakashi.

"Why don't you go see if Minato has an update on your team?" Rin suggested, pushing into a sitting position.

Apprehension entered Kakashi's eyes. The man still hadn't been able to explain his nervousness over the chunin exams, no matter how much he tried. Rin almost felt bad for bringing up the memory, almost. Team Seven was the only distraction that could get Kakashi out of her hair for an hour or two. Sensing the man's wavering resolve, Rin pushed. "I'm just going to take a bath anyway. A cool one," Rin amended when Kakashi opened his mouth. He had been reading one of her many books about the dos and don't of pregnancy; Rin wished that she'd thrown them out once she finished.

"I'm sure he would have sent someone if there was news," Kakashi countered. His voice lacked its usual certainty, however. He wanted to know what was happening with his students as much as Rin wanted some time to breathe.

Rin nodded, running a hand through her hair. "Probably, but it would be good for you to get your mind off this mess." She gestured around the apartment. "Besides, if I need you, I can create a clone to find you. I still know how to do some things."

Over the past few months, Rin had been developing her chakra control. Once her pregnancy had been confirmed, she'd been removed from active duty. With missions off the table, she spent more time at the hospital. Even so, Rin was only permitted to assist with certain cases, so she spent her free time working through exercises that improved her control. Hopefully, that would allow her the freedom to study more medical ninjutsu after the baby was born. If she'd learned anything from being on a team with hotheaded Obito and reckless Kakashi, it was that a medic was always necessary.

"You promise you'll come find me if you need anything?" Kakashi's voice held a note of uncertainty that surprised Rin. When she nodded, he tucked a strip of cloth into the book on his lap and placed it on the table. "I won't be gone long, but maybe you're right. I'm sure there are rumors about teams finishing the second exam by now."

"Take your time," Rin offered, schooling her face to impassivity. If she looked hopeful at the free time, Kakashi would see the trap. He stood, stretching the stiff muscles in his back, then glanced in her direction. A slight frown appeared on his face.

He's debating whether or not to kiss me, Rin realized with a start. While Kakashi had changed significantly over the past few days, the hesitancy about displaying emotions with her remained. Honestly, it didn't bother Rin as much as his lost memories did. Kakashi had always been private and reserved with his affections. Deciding to meet him halfway, Rin caught his hand with hers and squeezed. Kakashi exhaled in relief.

"Go on," Rin prompted, dropping her fingers away. "I'll be good, I promise."

A smile tugged at the corners of Kakashi's mouth as he stepped closer. To Rin's surprise, he leaned in and pressed a warm kiss to her forehead. An unfamiliar explosion of heat washed through her chest at the gesture. "I'll bring dinner home," Kakashi continued, completely unaware of the effect he had on her. "Don't even think of trying to make it while I'm gone."

"Promise," Rin laughed, hoping that her smile disguised the fact that she had just been considering that very thing.

When the door shut behind Kakashi, Rin glanced at the calendar on the wall. She calculated how much longer she'd have to endure Kakashi's worrying before life could get back to normal. If everything went perfectly, they would meet their son in twelve weeks; Rin could hang on that long. She didn't have a choice.

When a brief knock sounded on the office door, Minato glanced up from the paperwork in his hand. Shikaku slipped through before he had time to answer, and Minato's heart leaped into his throat. "Has there been news?"

The second chunin exam was coming to a close, and there still hadn't been any word of Naruto's team. Minato knew that his son and his teammates were talented shinobi, but the exams were designed to be taxing. He'd seen just as many groups fail because of bad luck as poor skill. With the relative peace in the shinobi nations, fewer genin were advanced to the next rank. Minato agreed with the changes, but he could still remember all too well how quickly the ninja wars had started.

Shikaku shook his head as he shut the door behind him. "None about Team Seven."

Minato understood what the man wasn't saying; there were more important things to worry about than Naruto's advancement. Shikaku's son was also competing in the exams, he had to be wondering about the same things as Minato, but Shikaku remained detached. He stayed focused on the other matters that required his attention to keep the village running. Shikaku had been an excellent pick as Minato's second in command, and Minato didn't know what he would do without him most days.

Dipping his head in understanding, Minato pressed a thumb and forefinger against his eyes to stave off a headache. It had been a stressful week. When he wasn't torn between worries over Kakashi's memory and Naruto's performance, Minato had been dealing with chaos of having multiple villages together. There had been half a dozen fights to break up, tempers that needed soothing, and the exhaustion of hosting delegates. He cringed. "What is it this time? A broken nose over which kage is the strongest? Blood feud over the death of a distant relative? A comment taken the wrong way?"

"None of the above." Shikaku didn't crack a smile at Minato's attempted levity. Whatever he had come to say must be bad. Minato waited in silence. "I wasn't sure what to make of the report, so I brought it to you immediately. Someone made an attempt against the village barrier."

Minato shifted, mind flashing back to Kakashi's warning about Orochimaru. Even so, he forced himself to think logically rather than responding with a knee jerk reaction. "Did the Anbu tasked with that portion of the village find anything out of the ordinary? Which team was it?"

Again, Shikaku shook his head. "Obito's team deemed it a false alarm, something bound to happen with this many foreigners in the village."

Minato nodded without answering. Technically, his advisor shouldn't know the names of the men and women in Anbu, but Obito's presence hadn't been easy to hide, especially from someone who worked closely with Minato. Shikaku had been an effective jonin commander because he knew the strengths and weaknesses of every jonin in the village. There were few who weren't under his purview at some point, but Minato had no doubt that the man knew them as well. He wouldn't be good at his job if he didn't.

"Was there any evidence to suggest otherwise, anything at all?" Minato hated asking the question, but he couldn't afford to be lax with village safety during the chunin exams. There had been too many warnings to write this off as a coincidence. Though, he knew that if Shikaku had more information, he would have supplied it already.

Shikaku's sigh spoke volumes. He'd been under the same pressure as Minato the past couple of weeks. "No, everything appears to be in order."

Minato wondered if Shikaku had been thinking about Kakashi's warning when he brought that message. As much as Minato wanted to, he hadn't been able to keep that solely between himself and Inoichi. He relied on Shikaku too much to withhold such critical information. Even so, he held back as much as he could about Kakashi's memory loss. Until he figured out the cause, the less that everyone else knew, the better.

Tapping long fingers against the polished wood of his desk, Minato considered. He wanted to hear the report from his Anbu, but that would require summoning Obito. Or, perhaps, he could get by with asking Tenzo about it. The remorse that Obito had shown for what he did to Kakashi wasn't enough; the boy needed to realize that his behavior would not be tolerated. Minato decided to summon Tenzo once Shikaku left and get the full report on the disturbance. Though, he suspected it was a false alarm.

Sensing that he'd only skimmed the surface of Shikaku's reports, Minato nodded. "What else?"

A wry grin twisted the jonin's commander's face as he glanced down at the notes in his hand. "Uchiha Fugaku has requested a private meeting with you." Minato's eyebrows rose at that, wondering who Fugaku would want to talk about, one of his sons or Obito. It wasn't like the clan head to meet with Minato for something minor.

Minato dipped his head in understanding, then Shikaku continued his thought. "He requests a private meeting in the Uchiha compound."

The locale didn't surprise Minato. Fugaku must have found out something about the mystery surrounding Kakashi, but it wasn't something he wanted to risk being overhead. Which meant that it probably touched on some clan secret. Having the Hokage come to the compound instead of the other way around would raise the clan's opinion of Fugaku, at least. There were still some people, particularly in the Uchiha clan, who wished that Fugaku had become Hokage instead of Minato. Hopefully the man's information would be worth the hassle.

Minato glanced at the clock. It wasn't quite noon, and he was already longing for home. "When am I supposed to be there?"

Shikaku consulted his notes to be sure he was correct before speaking. "Tonight. Your schedule was too full to allow time during the day, and with the second exam ending in the morning, there wasn't another opportunity."

Fugaku didn't want to wait that long, Minato realized after a moment. He dipped his head in understanding; there were a million loose ends that needed to be tied up before the final exam could begin. Even problems as important as this one had to wait. Minato rubbed at his temples in frustration, then gestured for Shikaku to continue. "What else?"

(Full chapter and story available on A03 and FF, linked at top of the post)

#Dimi writes #Altered Reality Update #KakaRin #Kakashi #Rin #Full chapter available on Archive and Fanfic #This update is ridiculously old and I'm sorry #Hopefully this will give me inspiration to keep going

[blackvelvetwriteson]

Hi, could I get a one shot fem! black reader x Kakashi, please? (can be nsfw or fluff, it's your choice)

Hey there! Thank you for the request 🥺🥺 I had a bit of a roadblock with this one simply because I couldn’t think of a prompt, BUT I eventually thought ‘why not write about the holidays’ so I got into a groove with it! Once I got into it, it was a really fun write! I hope that this is what you expected and/or lives up to your expectations! 

𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐈𝐃𝐀𝐘 𝐁𝐋𝐔𝐄𝐒

                                            (  ~ Kakashi Hatake x Black Female                                                                   Reader Insert ~ )

GENRE: Fluffy Fluff!                                                                  

FANDOM: Naruto Shippuden

TRIGGER WARNINGS: There really are none for today, it’s pretty fluffy for today!

SUMMARY: Reader-Chan wants to celebrate the holiday season this year because she never got to, but she doesn’t necessarily know how to approach Kakashi about it since he never celebrates the holidays (or ever even heard of them for that matter.

WORD COUNT: 4303

(Headers are mine, but the art inside of them are not! Please don’t steal or repost without credit!)

     For some reason, you were in an incredibly festive mood this time around. Maybe it was something about how the gilded sunlight made yours and Kakashi’s home feel more… Well, home-y. Maybe it was the remnants of your food that you’d made earlier for your lunch still lingering around the house, or the kids of the village running around outside of your windows, whether subliminally training or not undeterminable, reminding you of your youth. Time had gone by so fast, and already you’d been in Japan for about two years and a half. You already knew that, in general, the people of the area didn’t celebrate Halloween, and actually it was a week AFTER Halloween would’ve taken place in America, but something about today… Something about today made your festive bone quiver and you decided to do SOMETHING to celebrate. 

Since you’d picked up on the shinobi not celebrating American holidays like you were used to, you avoided asking Kakashi about it. Come to think of it, he never really did anything you were accustomed to besides the staring thing; and when you got together he tried to give you food related nicknames. You had to sit down and explain to him why it wasn’t okay and why it made you uncomfortable and then he thoroughly apologized and left it at that. He didn’t really have any nicknames for you, and from research you found that most women in Japan (and men) only go by their given names with -chan/san at the end which was cute, but if everyone had to call you that then it’d lose meaning and it wouldn’t be as cute.

Even still, though, you decided that today would be the day that you participated in the festivities of the holiday season that, in America, would be fast approaching. The only question for you was who you were going to dress up as and suddenly a thought formed in your head as you popped up from the couch and scurried to your guys’s room. You’d dress up as your hero, your boyfriend Hatake Kakashi! He wouldn’t expect it, you’d be able to see how everything fits, AND it’d be cute- at least you thought- and it’d give you something to do so that the crisp, perfect day didn’t go to waste.

You sifted through the closet with eager eyes as you hummed softly, some of your curls coming loose and falling down by your face, your dark brown beautiful eyes twinkling as you pulled out the parts to the outfit he wore from day to day, your eyebrows knitting a little as one corner of your lip lifted a little. “This man, so help me black Jesus,” you whisper softly noticing how much heftier your wardrobe was than his. He had the same outfit to go over about 5 or 5 times, black sweatpants, black shorts, and 3 different headbands all crushed, neatly, together on one side of the closet while your clothing took up the other half. You shook your head and closed the door with your hip once you were sure you had everything you needed for your little plan. You looked it over excitedly, your slender auburn fingers contrasting almost perfectly against the colors of his uniform. “Damn… I never noticed that till now,” you laugh softly as you remove your shirt and start to pull on articles of the outfit, trying to mimic exactly how you saw Kakashi wear his so you didn’t accidentally disrespect him. Of course he only had 2 masks and a shirt with a mask that you’d sewn onto it, and you decided not to mess with any of it. You didn’t want to hide your face at all whatsoever, especially behind masks that might’ve well have been your boyfriend’s comfort items. You had pretty much everything on, the worn out navy blue bringing everything together, the green brightening your pretty almost black eyes. You giggle softly as you look in the mirror and decide to do something with your hair before it dried completely- you’d taken a shower only 30 minutes prior and your hair was a little damp. You scurry off to the bathroom with the bandage and garter in one hand, your yellow hair pik in the other. You looked extremely excited, for once taking a moment to completely love and indulge in yourself. Being in an area where your existence was offensive to others to suddenly going to a place where absolutely nobody looked even close to you was an extreme shift, but Kakashi made it okay, literally brawling with anybody that so much as looked at you the wrong way. You had a small bit of tummy, but he loved that about you; and it’s not like it slowed you down any, made you unreliable, or made you any less attractive than you were. In fact, to some people it wasn’t even really noticeable unless you were wearing certain things. You also had to drop the American style and adopt the Japanese locale and honestly, while that was a HUGE shift, Kakashi helped with that too. Sometimes you’d get yourself in trouble with how you spoke though; that American lingo that’d been generationally passed down to you finding its way showing up and showing out, especially when someone wanted to make fun of your hair, or your physique and compare you to the other local girls, most noticeably Ten-Ten, Lady Tsunade, Sakura, and Hinata. They argued that the more pale girls were more attractive; because you could play in their hair and you wouldn’t have to worry about one slowing you down- at which remarks you stuck the shit talkers to a tree with your kunai for hours after you thoroughly cussed them out and ribbed them a little, telling Kakashi what’d happened so he could go cut them down. On the flip side, the kids absolutely adored you and loved when you were out so they could play tag or ask you unnecessary questions or get some treats from you.

You quick-washed your hair in the sink and started to blow-dry it deciding that you’d give yourself an at home blowout so that you could complete the look. Being the multitasker you were born into being, you found something to prop the blowdryer up while you piked your hair out quickly, smiling as you watched your hair fluff up, watching your coils straighten and then get bigger until it couldn’t anymore. Then it hit you; Kakashi hadn’t seen your hair blown out except once and that was while you were braiding it back and his eyes were fixated on your fingers as he wondered how a person could do that. At this point, your hair was halfway done, and while you let the tool dry your hair even more, you attempted to wrap the bandage around your thigh and it only BARELY made it, your thigh utterly choked in the process. You looked down at your leg and then pensively looked at the garter and decided that wouldn’t fit around your leg and you let out a frustrated sigh. “That man, is fine as fuck, but why he built like a bean pole,” you huff quietly as you let the bandage loose from trapping your thigh before your mind wandered to him. “…. Aight so maybe he got a LITTLE bit of muscle, but we aint talkin’ about that right now,” you laugh softly before looking at your phone seeing that he sent you a text signifying that he was on his way back from training for the day and that he was fine. You smiled cheerily at your text and tilted your head some at yourself, using your pik to fluff your hair out more before you scurried back to your guys’s room and snatched one of his spare headbands up, securing it quickly and tactfully. You looked at yourself in the mirror, your hands coming up and sliding into the arm holes of his navy green vest. You turned to one side, then to the next, then finally you looked at yourself from a front profile and your eyes glistened a little. “You’re… so heroic,” you mumbled under your breath before you heard some clatter coming from outside of the room.

“Oh right… You can do that,” you say as you open the door and watch him freeze completely in his spot, his eyes slowly raking over you from head to toe then back up again, his stoic expression unchanging from what you could tell. “H-Heyy… Honey,” you smile nervously as you wave with one of your gloved hands. He walked towards you and slipped one side of the headband over one of your eyes and then he stifled a soft grunt under his breath.

“It’s Kakashi. We’ve talked about this,” he said softly before he looked over his shoulders, his hands sliding in his pockets again as his back straightened out some. “….Why are you wearing my clothes,” he asked with a slight edge to his voice, meanwhile you were still frozen in place, your legs starting to quiver some. You didn’t know why he was being so cold to you and it made you just a little insecure. “Particularly… Those,” he said as he stared at the wall below the TV you both had, his legs crossed as he leaned back into the couch.

“Damn so you not gonna say ‘hi.’ Or ‘I missed you,’ or nothin’ like that hm? Well… My bad, I guess I’ll just go take it off,” you say softly, the spirit of the day becoming crushed. He mused softly and his head only tilted a small bit. He didn’t even look at you and you noticed this. The whole time you were here… The whole time you were together the only thing you wanted was his eyes on you and his praises. You were struggling and it was on you for the most part because you hadn’t reached out to him for help. He was a real big one for “say what you mean or need,” or something like that. You LOVED the idea behind the last stretch of the year; the days designated for giving thanks, hanging out with the ones you love, amazing food, and gifts, and movies, and music. All of it… But having come from where you had, you never really had good times or a good chance to make memories. Now that you were old enough to have someone of your own and actually be able to create memories, you wanted to… But instead you’d been trying to force it out of your life to make your man happy, however you weren’t having it anymore. You just didn’t know how to bring it up.

“Mm.. What’s-“

Before he could even finish speaking, you’d vanished back into your guys’s room and shut the door behind you. He sat back in the seat and he let out a low drawn out breath and then stood up. Within one second he vanished from the living room and appeared right in front of you with his arms crossed.

“I asked why you were wearing my clothes, not that you had to take them off,” he said as he looked blandly at your hurt expression. “And I was trying to ask what was up with you,” he said as he reached one hand out and gently tipped your head up, his free hand reaching for where your bangs covered your eye but then he stopped as he usually did and he tilted his head some. “May I?” He spoke from behind his mask. You push his hand out of the way and move your hair out of your face by yourself, your sharp eyes peering into his. This time his eyebrows rose a bit more noticeably and usual and he waited for you to talk so he could listen, his hands now in his pockets.

“Yknow… I’ve tried to work what is normal to me out of my system… And when I was younger, that would’ve been… Easier. But now, it’s not… Kakashi, when you don’t look at me it makes me feel undesirable… Because nobody else looks at me unless they’re making fun of how flat and wide my features are… or how damn burnt I look even though this is my natural skin tone! I just… Want you to call me your baby once in awhile damnit! I want to call you *mine* and not just… Ka-ka-shi. Everybody calls you that… And… I get jealous when I see the other people hanging out with you, the cooler people with the sharingan variants, or the cool eyes and the people with the slim builds, or the people with the advanced shinobi skills that are greater than mi-“ You hadn’t noticed that while you were talking, Kakashi pulled his mask down, then you were interrupted with a kiss. It was a soft, but soulful kiss; the kind where one of his gloved hands had you by the chin and the other by the back of your head. The kind where you could feel his body heat completely wrapping you up. The kind where you felt his trembling breath break his completely calm composure. Your hands were gently pressed against the back of his arms, one of your hands at his elbow as he pulled away and allowed his eyes to slowly open. His shadow was cast down onto you and you saw his eyes squint a little, his smile hidden by the mask he’d pulled back up after the kiss. On the other hand, your eyes were wide and your lips were barely parted, your eyes glistening as you looked over his mostly hidden smile. Your knees buckled under you and he helped make sure you didn’t fall, his chest pressed against yours.

“You done?” He asked as he helped you stand upright again. You were dazed just staring at your man and he smirked a little as he pulled his mask down again still standing close to you. “I see… You want everyone to know that you’re mine and vice versa? That’s it? That’s why you’re wearing my clothes today…? You want me to… Call you mine? Right?” He spoke quietly, he was ONLY talking to you, his deep voice getting a little more hoarse as he continued to drone on, his hands on your hips pulling you closer to him, his intense gaze still cast into your eyes. You swallow hard and nibble the inside of your cheek. “You want you to call you my baby? My beautiful, perfect baby girl? Hm? Is that why you’re acting out? Or… You want me to show you that I care more, right? Maybe… You want me to make dinner once? Or bring you flowers? Or watch you train? Or… Cheer you on? Right? Perhaps tease you a little… Or hold you this close all the time?”

You nod slowly and then look away already knowing what this was sort of leading up to but his slender fingers forced your gaze back on him.

“Look at me when I’m talking to you, baby,” he said softly as he tilted his head a little. “If you wanted that… Why didn’t you just say so? I can’t read minds… And I’m still relatively new to this whole… Romance scene,” he said softly as he gently stroked your cheek with his thumb. “You know this. I’m a little… Dense? I’m not sure if that’s the proper word. But…. You’re just… Ugh… I didn’t know that me hanging around people made you jealous- perhaps it’s in my best interest to just tell you how much you mean to me all of the time. You’d want that too, right? I know you would,” he said softly as his fingers gently trailed up your back. “Or… Maybe you want to have a little bit more sex? Is that apart of it?” The question made your eyes wide, skin burn with an invisible blush, and your jaw drop a little. He let out a hollow laugh in turn, gently pushing your jaw up to close your mouth with the tips of his fingers. “Baby steps. I got it. For now, let me just say this: You’re beautiful… All of your scars, curves, marks and all. Those coffee colored eyes of yours are so much more… Stupefying than any sharingan I have seen and will ever see…. The little spark they get when you’re determined, or that soft glisten when you get embarrassed,” he said as he looked over your whole face. “Your body… Your whole body… Is amazing… You don’t have to be slim to be an amazing shinobi; and so help me, my beautiful queen,” he says softly as he leans down so he’s eye level with you. “If you ever discredit yourself like that again, I’ll work you out so that you’re not able to move for the next week. You’re right on the fast track to be a fine shinobi- possibly even the greatest at that. Well… Not greater than me, but that’s another story and another conversation,” he said quietly as you were pushed back onto your bed while he stood over you. “Are those idiots getting into your head again?” His eyebrows furrowed a little as his hands slipped back into his pockets.

Finally you were able to find your words again and you crossed your legs out of habit. “Y-Yeah… For… Like… The past 3 weeks they’ve been telling me that I’m too slow… Or I’m too… Wide… Or making fun of me and my eyes, or making fun of how dark I am… Or making fun of my hair! My damn hair! It hurts… A lot… And we’re together, but I don’t want to be known as that abnormal girl that calls on her boyfriend every time she needs saving. I got it… Aight? I can handle that… But… That’s why I need YOUR praises…. To validate me I guess… I already know I’m THAT… girl… But I want to hear it from you… I want you,” you mumbled softly. “And the reason I’m dressed up like this is because I’m dressed up for Halloween- In America it’s a day where people dress up and do their makeup and hair and have fun at parties or go trick or treating to get candy and stuff! I’ve always loved it despite not being able to… Participate much,” you say softly as you rub your arm. “I dunno, I guess I just wanted to celebrate the holiday season this year- even if we never do it again, I at least want one memory of a great holiday season with mine… With you,” you say softly. He listens to everything you say with an opaque grin on his face.

“If that’s what you wanted, then why didn’t you just say that?” He said softly as he climbed over you, his hips barely resting in your lap as your heart skipped a beat. He pushed you to lay down on the bed and his hands rested right by your head, your eyes peering up at him with a soft grin rested on your face.

“I-I d-didn’t w-want to get told no… I d-didn’t want to… Bother you with something that seemed so insignificant… I didn’t want you to think of me as weak,” you say softly as he gently kisses your neck. You shuddered a little and bit your lip as you tilt your head up some.

“Well now’s your hot seat,” he huffed quietly against your neck. “Tell me what you want, tell me everything you want, and I’ll do it until you tell me that you don’t want it anymore,” he said as he looked back into your eyes, your hands rested against his chest as you thought for a moment before speaking again. “W-Well… I want you to call me your baby and vice versa… Or come up with a nickname or something… I want you to watch me train and root for me, I want you to let everyone know who I belong to, but allow me to show who you belong to, too… I want you to tease me and hold me close… Everywhere… I want you to go on dates with me and do holiday stuff with me… I want you to make me feel wanted and loved… I just fucking want *you* Kakashi…” you say softly as you look up at him. Upon gazing, you notice that his expression had soften significantly, and the hold he had on you was more protective than ever. “A-And I guess more s-sex would be cool,” you say softly and he chuckles quietly in return. You reach one of your hands up and gently cup his face, your thumb gently caressing his cheek. “You know… You should smile more… You’re quite handsome when you do… Well I mean you’re fine as hell either way, but I like it when you smile… And laugh like that…” you say softly as he leans his head into your hand a little more. He kisses your clothed palm and smiles just for you and suddenly you took on a breathless expression, your eyes halfway open as he blushed a little and you just took this moment to adore him, everything about him. “That’s what you want from me? Okay,” he said softly before moving to pin your hand weakly to the bed above you, his eyes both gazing into yours- well as much as he could anyway seeing as your hair practically swallowed your face leaving your bottom half of your face exposed for him. You could see him just fine, he just couldn’t see you… And for the moment that was fine. His gentle lips pressed against yours from above and your eyes fluttered shut as usual when this happened. You felt a little touch starved because he didn’t like contact very much, but he was warming up to it a little more. You wrapped one of your arms around his waist and pulled him closer, and then the two of you melted into each other on the bed in a fit of grunts, deep, passionate, soft kisses, dulcet giggles coming from the both of you, his hand wandering up your waist up the natural curve of your body as yours tried to find where his clothing allowed you access to his skin. You found it, your warm fingers contrasting against his lukewarm skin. He jolted a little and let out a groan before looking at you again, nibbling your lip gently before he pulled away. “You’re amazing,” he whispered quietly and breathlessly against your lips as you tried to control your breathing again.

“Says one of the most notable and historic ninja warriors of all time,” you say with a soft chuckle, moving your hair out of your face so you could look at him and so he could look at you.

“You know… Paths like that carry plenty of… Skeletons in the closet, right?” He said softly as his gaze intensified only a little bit.

“Yeah, and? You still made it… Everyone looks up to you… You’ve killed people and seen plenty of your own killed… And people that couldn’t handle it… Y’know… But, Kakashi Hatake,” you say softly as you turn his head back towards you and your own expression hardens a little. “No matter what, I’ll still love you like the day that I met you… Just like that day you first came to protect.. Well the other person- after they were bullying me… After you checked to make sure I was okay… Baby I love you, and as long as you love me too, I’m gonna be on your side. I’m your woman- I’m your queen, right? A queen needs her partner in royalty, and this house is our kingdom. You’re my king, and unapologetically mine… And I’m the same for you,” you say quietly as you sit up and smile a little. “I know you haven’t been sleeping, Kashi,” you say softly as you gently kiss his lips. “I’m not a super heavy sleeper… You’re safe now, though,” you say softly as you run your fingers through his hair. “Let me go make dinner tonight and… C-Can I decorate?” You whispered softly, expecting a no as you turned and gently pushed him to make him lay on the bed and he chuckled softly, gently grabbing your hand.

“If decorations are what you want, then I don’t have a problem with it,” he said softly, kissing the back of your hand gently. Your skin burned with an invisible flush and you pulled the covers up on him, trying to make the room just a little more homey so that he could sleep better.

“I… Wow… Um… Okay,” you say softly, lighting a candle and setting it on the nightstand, standing in the doorway. “I d-don’t know if I said this already, but I’m gonna make a hot pot for dinner… And I’ll go see if there are any pumpkins in the area… I’ll make us some pumpkin bread and make some cookies for the kids,” you say with a beaming smile, looking at your sleepy man who was already cuddling a pillow on his way to sleep. He admired your soothing voice, able to relax for the first time in a long time, and how the golden sun gave you a gilded glow that made your skin twinkle and your eyes illuminate the room. He had never felt so lucky to have someone as good as you to him, and that was the last thing he saw- or thought- before he slipped off into dreamland and you disappeared behind the door to excitedly start dinner.

#black velvet x naruto #requested writes #kakashi hatake #kakashi hatake fluff #kakashi x you #kakashi x reader #kakashi x black reader #kakashi x black female reader #kakashi hatake x female reader #black velvet asks #jenesis answers

[smellycinnamonthundahfudge]

The Black Widow Essay

one of em anw, lol

i'm just gonna start with the very beginning of the film, cause start to finish, they put so much detail in and you can tell everyone really cared to make natasha's story as full & vibrant as they possibly could.

them showing how early on she liked dying her hair or was used to it, even as a child?

as well as such innocent sweet things as this scene

all possibly subtly hinting these girls’ physical capabilities and their dark upbringing or who they really are as spies???

just, how seemingly normal child like things could be subtle hints toward something darker??

but it was STILL something innocent and sweet nevertheless whether they were able to do that cause of their training??

LOVED THAT.

the fact that NAT HAD FRIENDS??? WHEN SHE WAS A KID???

so important to me...

(cause they didn't really need to add that,... but they did)

how the whole operatives pretending as fake families made perfect sense cause they do it all the time in spy movies…

and how yeah, if there were child spies, then they could be used for spy families,

but this was the first movie that DARED to talk about the complexity of it all…

of a fake family being the only family that you had.

I bring this up because I just fucking love it and it reminds me of what they did in wandavision

rushed holidays and birthdays and normal family occasions all in one, because that was all they could get…

the idea of fake empty families in both bw and wv and jac schaeffer being involved with both of em??? gods im in love hahahah

in other spy movies, it’s just so plot focused…

they’re disguised as this to get to this and blablabla

they don’t dare to talk that they were more than their mission

that they have interests hobbies hopes dreams AND LIVES, beyond their work

(say what you will about captain marvel, but I will repeat, it was the first to show women had lives interests hobbies dreams beyond the work that they had...)

i just... the spy families thing is always so plot-centric, but this one, the infiltration aspect had an emotional side to it since it meant that they could all get a reprieve from their normal horrific lives

that's what i ADORE from this film, when they do something, they always hit for the most emotional, most moving, compelling way it can be told or shown

because, all this time we’ve been told, she’s a child assassin, she’s a child spy, she started when she was young dadadaaa

in other movies, they probably could’ve explored this by showing the violence

what was done to her, to show the meaning of what they did to her…

but you know what I absofuckingtutely die for??

they showed the meaning of the violence through this

that BECAUSE of what was done to her…

she could do that

SHE COULD PROTECT SOMEONE ELSE FROM SUFFERING THE SAME FATE AS SHE DID

all, in the first FIFTEEN 15 FUCKING MINUTES…

I just love how the never endless mention of the child assassin thing

the heaviest meaning of that was so beautifully shown like this…

like, YEAH

THIS.

THIS IS WHAT BEING A FUCKING CHILD ASSASSIN MEANS.

SHE’LL STEAL YOUR GUN, SHOOT TO KILL

ALL TO PROTECT HER INNOCENT, YOUNGER, SISTER

oh wait, I also just love the action of the plane scene

it had so much stakes, I was genuinely panicked and fearing for all of them..

melina was shot, nat was flying the plane, yelena was a terrified baby, alexei was even hanging from the freaking wing…

it wasn’t just weightless action, random kicks and punches on screen…

it was a family fleeing for their lives.

I just wanted to commend the incredible stakes the creatives made sure to put into the film’s first action scene is all.

they could have phoned this in and just have hopper punch some dudes

but they WANTED you to root for this family

they WANTED you to feel scared for them, care about them.

THEY CARED.

the first action scene nat ever did, was to protect her sister…

they could have shown her take down some men following after them…

but they DECIDED for nat to show her full capabilities… when it would matter most.

THEY CARED.

AND… NO ONE, NOT NEARLY ENOUGH PEOPLE ARE TALKING ABOUT IT.

you know what I love about the budapest reveal??

they could have just kept it at the clarifying what actually happened thing

and all of us in the audience can revel in the fact that

shooting it out with the hungarian guard and blowing up a building

was in nat’s eyes

just like a literal alien invasion of floating monsters descending from a portal in the sky

just… bask & appreciate the comedy of this guys…

nat’s so funny, I cant…

no okay, they could have just kept it at that…

but they decided to add WHAT HUMANITY THEY COULD IN THAT BACKSTORY.

and they had nat & clint play tic tac toe in the air vents they were hiding out on…

they didn’t have to do that, but they did…

and not enough people appreciate it enough.

people are already talking about how excellent and wonderful it was, the conversations and commentaries on choice are and I’m only here to say YES MORE OF THAT SHARE IT TO EVERYFREAKING ONE GODDAMN IT

in most marvel movies, the female character & the hero usually just either butt heads or the female just helps out the hero in whatever they need to do, they’re the infallible support structure that keeps the hero up

I think… this is why the dynamic between yelena and nat, hits so goddamn hard…

your pain makes you stronger

so much of this film talks about how their pain made them stronger, the best example of this I believe, is the scene in cuba

what I said about the child assassin repetition all concluding to that “I will kill you all, DON’T TOUCH HER” scene…

her pain was LITERALLY what enabled her to do that.

but I bring back the film’s crux line, cause it’s what I think truly separates and makes yelena and nat’s dynamic so much richer more complex and beautiful to me…

the pain of their past.

nat’s insistence of their time together in america not being real, and her dismissing everything in her past as a widow of the red room as horrible and just something she needed to get away from…

it reminds me of a scene from a show my family watches,

new amsterdam. in it, a woman, escapes a house of neglect and abuse. but she also left behind her younger sister in that household, and naturally, feels deeply guilty about it.

but, her therapist said to her, “you saved the only person that you could.”

and, … I can’t think of anything better to fit nat’s situation.

her dismissal of everything in her past as horrible was a fucking coping mechanism…

it made leaving everything behind, easier…

“it wasn’t real, so there isn’t anything to hold onto” nat herself says

she saved the only person she could… herself.

sigh…

most marvel movies usually just have its theme as “be who you were meant to be”

tony, thor, quill, & rocket learned selflessness

peter parker learned to appreciate what HE had, and not focus on what he was escaping from and to

steve figured out who he was in a new world

t’challa reckoned with the sins of the past

(scott’s just a dad)

carol learned to own her power and who she truly was

but nat??

yeah, sure, she could also fall under that theme.

but I just… I honestly believe the abuse, the pain she endured… makes her arc so much more meaningful and poignant…

because it wasn’t just the hero struggling, then the female side character reassuring them & giving them the strength they needed to be who they needed to be

it was her reckoning with what she did…

it was her shutting off yelena who cared about her, because she didn’t want to think about what she left behind

it was her, keeping her heart… when her mother could not.

how despite melina felt she was a rat in a cage

what SHE taught nat, was what kept nat alive…

the pain nat escaped, still found its way to her, in that because of that pain, she caused pain to the little happiness that she had in her past

she caused pain to yelena, because it was all she could associate to her past, which she NEEDED to escape

pain was inflicted on her, and she inflicted pain too

she also just casually stated her mother throwing her out like garbage

was I the only one who was utterly shaken by her statement??

to only then after say, she thought of her everyday even if she didn’t admit it to herself

(don’t even get me started on this search & importance of her past to her being fucking hinted in the place she died, vormir, where she learned her father’s name.

how even after she defeated dreykov… she still didn’t know it, til then…)

I just…

the creatives put so much effort into making nat’s story so full of heart, humanity, and meaning…

the humanity of tic tac toe over hiding out from an army

playing in the yard and colorful dyed hair hinting the dark upbringing

reckoning with what one did to survive…

black widow, is such a heartfelt humanely painful and beautiful film…

it isn’t just another spy movie

it isn’t just another marvel movie

they talked about abuse in it, guys…

they acknowledged it, unflinchingly

the good, the bad, all of it, the entire truth of it…

that alexei wasn’t allowed a chance to be forgiven for what he did

that he can wash himself clean, and that they give him their forgiveness, for HIS benefit…

that it was the very pain inflicted on them, that enabled them to take their abusers down

You think I can’t take a punch?

it was literally her pain threshold & strength that enabled her to break free from dreykov's control

her capability of severing the nerve borne from the training she endured

her pain was literally what made her stronger

they made sure to show that oksana and antonia wouldn’t be forgotten

they let the other widows do their part

and the ones the family saved, came back for them and saved them too

even antonia, as taskmaster, had someone who cared about her. the young widow who told her to smile, went to her when she was no longer controlled.

it was fighting for control, it was looking & focusing on what WAS there

just like how nat learned to accept that not all of her past was horrible,

I want to show you how this movie shows that not all of how nat was treated in the mcu was horrible

the thank you for your cooperation scene, yes

but, one parallel that I haven’t seen anyone bring up yet is this one…

nat did her job, and it’s how they took down hydra

nat did her job, and that’s how they took down the red room

because of nat’s intelligence, due diligence, they had the intel they needed to take down hydra

and to find and save the other widows…

because that’s precisely why I would die for this film…

they. care.

they remembered that small, for most people forgettable, thing that she did- BUT WAS ACTUALLY THE KEY TO THE WHOLE THING

AND MADE DAMN SURE TO SHOW & HIGHLIGHT ITS IMPORTANCE IN HER FILM.

(her copying the data needed to SAVE THE OTHER WIDOWS IN THE WHOLE WORLD WAS GIVEN THE FOCUS & ENERGY NEEDED TO HIGHLIGHT THAT SCENE'S SIGNIFICANCE CAUSE W/O THAT DATA, THOSE WOMEN WOULD BE LOST)

they KNEW that HER COPYING THAT INFO in the lemurian star in tws IN THE FIRST FUCKING PLACE is HOW NICK FIGURED OUT HYDRA’S PLAN

AND DECIDED TO FUCKING PARALLEL THAT TOO IN HER FILM CAUSE THEY KNEW THAT DESPITE HOW SMALL THAT SCENE WAS, IT WAS ACTUALLY THE KEY TO THE ENTIRE THING

they know the significance that nat’s story has, how it’s about abuse, and what it does to people

it makes them want to run away & dismiss everything that happened as purely horrible

sometimes, it makes them betray people (like melina & even to some extent, nat…)

they did all this in a marvel movie

the importance of choice, control, autonomy, of women’s lives, every aspect of it

the mundane, their intelligence, their pain, their relationships, their humor & happiness & love…

this was a marvel movie, starring women, produced by women, written (jac schaeffer, wv creator too), directed (cate shortland), and edited (leigh folsom) by women.

this was an excellent beautiful painfully heartfelt luminescent movie, from start to finish.

so much care compassion complexity & love, woven into the story

they cared about what nat DID manage to do in the mcu, not that she was forced into the sidelines

(though, honestly, I think that line about nat never letting herself be alone long enough to figure out what her story is was such an interesting & cool way of acknowledging it…)

nat never spoke much in the films, and they went with it, she’s not the inspiring speech type, she herself says

behind the scenes, they were making nat look as cool as possible with those poses

but in this film, they made it HER character trait

that SHEEEE, WANTS TO POSE LIKE THAT.

I just think that’s so funny… a cute character trait of her wanting to pose all the time and denying/not acknowledging it??

I think it’s a sweet & funnily humanizing trait of hers :’’’))

they made her funny like that, heh…

most mcu movies, they have arcs, they have great interesting moving stories…

I just think this film is chockfull of love over natasha romanoff, a hero, an avenger’s story…

they put so much in to give her as full of a life as they could… a complex, heartbreaking, painful, happy, tragic, loving, human life…

most mcu movies… they’re so plot focused. find this, follow that.

for me, this film wasn’t.

it was women getting their control back.

behind the screen, and on screen, it was women getting their control back…

after a decade and more of getting bits of meaningful crumbs here and there, the creatives of this film gathered all those up, and built a full complex life and story from it…

it dealt with something so real and tragic but also beautiful and full of love.

I don’t think most mcu movies did this.

and it’s why I wrote all of this.

give credit where it’s due.

black widow is the most heartbreakingly painful and beautiful film marvel’s ever made…

it was a full and concise and finished and complete story, start to finish, about the hero who’s earned it, the goddamned most.

acknowledge what they did with this film.

it’s what they, nat & the creatives, deserve.

acknowledge it.

they didn’t work this hard to give nat such a meaningful loving & complex life and family and story, only for it to be called lesser

than films who tackle their themes in much shorter times

and with themes that aren’t as rooted in reality

acknowledge what they did.

acknowledge it.

I’m not really that knowledgeable over what framing and lighting really means…

but I think those details mean something

how their life at ohio, playing in the yard was flickered with sunlight, and fireflies

how it turned to night when they were forced to flee and return to russia

how it was night when they first entered the red room

but then there’d be more and more light as nat had progressed with their plan, with beams of light, flashing through the window behind her

and then once the dust had settled, the sun was rising on them, the survivors.

but… the most poignant & meaningful of all these lighting shots that I found…

was nat’s endings,

when she said goodbye to her family…

it was almost like, she was saying goodbye to us too…

with daylight, shining all around behind her, as she walked away and whistled her goodbye

this happening with her goodbye to her family

and with her official final shot of her, heading into the horizon, to her destiny

saving the universe, and saving her family

they cared so much to give her these beautifully poetically luminescent images of her, guys…

my heart breaks as I don’t see anyone else acknowledging this…

so please… acknowledge it.

acknowledge, what they did.

acknowledge it.

#*mic drop* #lol hahhahah #black widow #natasha romanoff #love #women #marvel women #women of marvel #scarlett johanssen #cate shortland #jac schaeffer #leigh folsom #marvel studios #marvel cinematic universe #marvel #:') cries #:') #florence pugh #yelena boleva #black widow movie #black widow 2021 #black widow film #natasha and yelena #melina vostokoff #rachel weisz #nat romanoff #ca:tws #captain america: the winter soldier #captain america the winter soldier #long post

[alj4890]

And Then I Left You

(Thomas Hunt x OC*Amanda) in a what if to the And Then I Met You

A/N Amanda is back in Cordonia. Thomas decides to do something to make certain his feelings for the duchess are true. The only thing is, his tests cause problems.

@krsnlove​ ​ @my-heart-beats-for-ya​ ​ @aworldoffandoms​ ​ @flyawayboo​ ​  @trappedinfanfiction​ ​ @everythingmarvelsherlockspn​ ​  @sophxwithers​ ​ @kate-mckenzie​ ​ ​ @twinkleallnight​ ​ ​ 

Masterlist

Chapter 4 Missing You

Private Airfield, Cordonia...

"What are you doing here?" Amanda smiled as Drake hugged her.

"I was in the area and thought you might like some company for the ride home." He reached out to take the majority of her bags.

"I would." She followed him over to the town car.

Once they were on the road and the privacy barrier was raised, Drake turned toward her.

"So?"

"So what?"

"Are we going to talk about why you came home earlier than you planned?" He asked.

Amanda lowered her eyes. "You know why."

"I have a few theories."

She let her head fall back against the seat. "I thought it wise to do so."

"Because?" He prodded

"Because I...if I'm going to be a part of this social season, then I might as well get back into the swing of being a noble again"

"Amanda." He folded his arms. "Why did you really come home?"

She dropped her head in her hands. "If I tell you, you must promise me you won't tell anyone."

"I won't."

"I mean it." She looked up at him. "Not even Liam."

"I won't." Drake repeated.

"I knew I needed to leave because I was falling in love with Thomas.” She admitted. 

“You were what now?” He mumbled in disbelief.

“I know.” She rubbed her right temple. “I’m ridiculous.” She closed her eyes. “I was so close to admitting to him everything, including my having to come back here for Liam’s social season.”

Drake sat there in stunned silence.

“He wouldn’t have returned my feelings.” She added. “Thomas is, I mean, I’m nowhere near his type.”

“How do you know?”

“I’ve seen the women he once dated.” Amanda explained. “They’re gorgeous--”

“You’re not ugly.” Drake reminded her.

“Sophisticated--” She continued.

“You’re a literal duchess.” He grumbled. “You have traveled the world, talked to people in positions of power, have been trained in every proper form of--”

“And talented.” She finished.

He merely stared at her with one eyebrow raised.

“What?” Amanda asked.

“The man is making a movie from your novel, your bestselling novel.”

“Drake.” She muttered in a frustrated tone.

“I’ve never seen you like this.” He tilted his head as he watched her hands clasp together, only to go to fiddling with her purse strap. They then clasped together with a death grip.

“Yeah, well.” she gestured toward herself. “I did it again.”

“Did what?”

“Fell for another friend!” She snapped. “A friend that only feels friendship for me.” She folded her arms and slouched in her seat while turning away from him. “I shouldn’t be friends with men.”

“Come on.” He scoffed. “You never fell for me or Liam. And your thing with Maxwell was what, a crush? I mean if you fell for Thomas then you must not have really been in love with Maxwell.” 

“I guess.” She grumbled. Her irritation turned to melancholy. “It’s different this time, Drake.”

“I can tell.” 

“How?’

He rubbed a hand down his face. “For one thing, you were willing to tell him. You never wanted to admit it to Maxwell. Second, you ran away.”

“Is it running away when I simply came home?” She asked.

“You ran away from him.” He corrected. 

“I did.” She rested her head against the window. “I wanted to stay with Thomas. I had actually planned before Leo’s abdication to miss this social season.”

“There you go.” Drake pointed out. “Your willingness to not come home proves that this is different.”

“I’ve never felt this way before.” She admitted. “And nothing can come from it.”

“Why not?”

“Well other than my belief that he doesn’t feel the same, Thomas never dates those he works with.”

“But you’re not working with him now. Right?”

“I still am. When he comes here to film, I will need to show him around, possibly do some rewrites and all.” She grimaced. “And he said he would like to work with me in the future.” Her eyes narrowed in thought. “Perhaps that was his way of telling me there can’t be anything between us.”

****************

Hollywood, California...

It had only been a week since she left, yet Thomas felt Amanda's absence more than he anticipated.

Every part of his home seemed to hold a memory of her. Each time he entered a room, he expected to either hear or see her.

The past few mornings, he had even put her kettle on while preparing her teacup with his coffee.

"It's merely a habit that I will break." He grumbled to himself.

But, he didn't want to break it.

He didn't want to go back to how life was before she came to work with him.

"Hey boss." Holly greeted as she came in. "Addison's running late but is bringing breakfast to make up for it."

He merely grunted while pouring her a cup of coffee.

"Thanks." Holly cradled the mug between her hands.

She glanced over at the tea kettle whistling. Her eyes followed Thomas as he hastily set it to the back of his stove. When he simply stared dejectedly at it, she cleared her throat.

"It's weird isn't it?" She took a sip of her coffee. "Not having Amanda here."

"Yes." He mumbled, taking his coffee over to the bar.

Holly waited an extra beat before prodding a little more. "You know, when you first proposed her living here while working on the screenplay, I honestly expected it to be a disaster."

A ghost of a smile appeared briefly on his lips. "I'm still surprised how easy it was to live with Amanda."

"Especially since she was a total stranger." Holly added.

"I'm glad I did it." He admitted. "It was one of the best decision I've ever made."

Holly pulled a barstool up and sat down across from him. "You two seemed to mesh well, all things considered."

Thomas lifted an eyebrow in silent question.

"I mean, your personalities are different. Well, only to some extent." She corrected. "More that you ended up complimenting each other. Her positive outlook clashing peacefully with your sometimes disillusioned views was interesting to see." Holly smiled at him. "In fact, I think she rubbed off on you."

He snorted softly. "It was impossible to remain in a bad mood around her."

"We noticed."

He narrowed his eyes at her. "I noticed that you and Addison were noticing. Don't think I was ignorant of your not so subtle nudges to try and push Amanda and me together."

Holly rolled her eyes. "Heaven forbid we try and put you with someone whose company you actually enjoyed."

"It could have ended badly." He reminded her.

"It could have." She conceded. "But it also could have been something great." She shrugged when a look of alarm crossed his face. "It's obvious how much she adores you."

Thomas hesitated. "She is a kind person to everyone."

Holly nodded. "True. But think of everywhere we took her. All the people she got to know." A smirk settled on her lips. "And yet, Amanda always gravitated back to you."

"That--that can easily be explained with the fact that our cohabitation made me a person she could be at ease with." He stuttered.

Holly shrugged once more. "She never once flirted or even hinted at wanting any of the guys Addison and I introduced her to."

Thomas felt a raging jealousy flood over him. "Yes, I know all about you trying to set her up with others while trying to put us together."

"Well, you wouldn't act on the mutual attraction you two obviously share." Holly snapped. "So we decided to try and make a romance happen with some of our other friends because we like her and wanted her to stick around."

Addison walked in on the two glaring murderously at one another.

"Happy Monday!" She greeted, settling a box of doughnuts, cinnamon rolls, and danishes between them. "I brought treats to help set our week off on the right foot."

Thomas grumbled a thank you then told them he was going to work in his study.

"What would you like?" Addison asked him. "One of each?"

"I don't care." He poured another cup of coffee, took the plate she had prepared, and told them he didn't want to be disturbed.

Once the door was slammed shut, Addison whispered. "What happened?"

"He misses Amanda and I used it to try and make him see why he does." Holly picked through the offerings Addison had brought in, choosing a cherry danish and a powdered doughnut for herself. "That and I may have lied a little that we tried to get her to fall for other men."

"Holly!" Addison gasped in delight. "You did? No wonder he looked like he wanted to murder you."

"Yeah, well. He is going to be miserable until he makes up his mind." Holly muttered.

Addison peeked down the hallway to his study to make sure they couldn't be overheard. "Do you think he will actually do something now that she's gone?"

"Who knows?" Holly got up to add more sugar to her coffee. "They say absence makes the heart grow fonder. Let's hope it does so quickly for these two."

***************

Thomas spent the day secluded in his study. Though he worked on developing a plan to begin shooting The Earl's Undoing, he took numerous breaks to sit and debate whether or not to call Amanda.

She had called him to let him know she had made it home safely. Then he managed to find reasons to call her each day. Sometimes the call was about where something was he had, "misplaced," and others were wanting her opinion on a possible scene in the movie.

Those barely lasted five minutes before they began to talk about other things.

Thomas had never enjoyed talking on the phone, much less texting. He preferred speaking in person so that he could see the facial expressions and gestures.

Yet, he willingly spent hours on the phone with Amanda and even encouraged her to text him.

Today though, he thought through all that Holly said, which incidentally kept him from calling the one he wanted to hear from most.

Could we have something more that wouldn't end badly?

He leaned back in his chair, rocking back and forth, to contemplate his future.

What if what I feel is simply from being used to having her near? Shouldn't I make certain that my feelings toward her are genuine? Only a fool wouldn't use this time to test what my heart truly wants.

He stilled. Opening the middle left hand drawer of his desk, he dug around until he found a slim black book.

He flipped it open and scanned through the many names that he had once considered dating.

Scratching out the ones who were currently in relationships with other people; he picked up his phone, took a deep breath, and began the process of making plans for the next few weeks. Drinks, dinners, the occasional escort to a charity or awards event...all were eager for some time alone with him.

Thomas grimaced at not feeling that sense of excitement he felt just from merely seeing Amanda's number light up his screen.

"This is good." He said to himself. "This will prove whether or not what is in my heart is truly how I feel towards--"

His phone lit up with a text message.

Unable to fight a grin at seeing some images Amanda had sent him of her home, he called her right away and settled in for what would be his favorite part of the day.

****************

St Orella, Cordonia...

"Hudson said you wanted to see me." Amanda stepped outside and grinned. "Are you grilling steaks?"

Drake smirked proudly. "In thanks for letting me stay here instead of being stuck in the palace."

She sat down in one of the lounge chairs and gazed about the expansive grounds of her home. She had always loved the views of the rocky cliffs with the crashing waves. The salty sea air held a bitter bite to it that wasn't found along Cordonia's southern sandy beaches.

Her happiness being home was bittersweet. She was still surprised how at home she felt at Thomas's. It had happened from the moment she stepped in his home and had seen all he had done to make her stay comfortable. She hoped that when he came here to film that he would feel the same way about hers.

"Still like yours medium?" Drake interrupted her thoughts about Thomas.

"Hmm? Oh. Yes." She blinked. "Thanks."

He cut his eyes to her. "Thinking about Hunt again?"

"No." She tried to lie. "I was thinking about how little work I had to catch up on."

"Right." He snorted. "That always causes a dreamy look on your face."

She stuck her tongue out at him before giggling at his own childish response. "Fine. You caught me. He's hard to forget."

Hudson came outside. "Pardon me, your grace, but Lord and Lady Beaumont are here."

Amanda stood up, to only be nearly knocked down by the hugs the couple swept her in.

"Why didn't you tell us you were home?!" Maxwell asked.

"We would have thrown you a welcome home party!" Nadia added while squeezing her tight.

"I was planning on telling you today." Amanda gasped for air. "I knew neither of you would have been happy with my needing to work before a party." She stepped back and smiled warmly at them.

It was such a relief to see them and not feel heartache or longing of any kind. Drake was right. She really had only had a crush on her best friend. She no longer had to feel guilty for such misguided feelings with Nadia trying to develop a close friendship.

At least this part of her life was as it should be.

"I smell Walker marinade." Maxwell leaned over to see what Drake was brushing it to. "We were planning on stealing you away for a night out. The Cordonian clubs haven't been the same since you left."

"And we can't wait to show you our new home." Nadia added.

"How come I haven't seen it yet?" Drake asked.

"We finally finished decorating it." Maxwell explained. Pulling his Nadia into his embrace, he continued. "My talented beyond measure, artistic wife wanted everything to be perfect before anyone came over."

She gave him an affectionate peck before turning to Amanda and Drake. "How about after dinner you both drive out to our place and then we'll have a fun night dancing?"

"I don't dance." Drake reminded them.

"Fun night drinking top shelf while watching us dance." Maxwell corrected. "Our treat."

Drake cocked an eyebrow at Amanda.

"Sounds like just what I need." She replied with a genuinely happy smile.

If anything, it would hopefully distract her from being tempted to call Thomas again.

*****************

The weeks went by slowly for the two. Thomas began his series of tests to see if perhaps he wasn't just lonely for someone rather than someone specific. While he did that, he continued to call and text Amanda, even doing so on his supposed dates.

Though he didn't tell her anything about them.

Each date ended the same. The women either hinted or came right out and said they wanted to do this again soon and Thomas quickly nixed that idea. The idea of having to spend even more time with these women made him nearly sprint to his car, leaving his dates in shock at his reaction.

He thought he was doing rather well at keeping these dates hidden from those closest to him. The few times he had bumped into someone he knew, he hurriedly explained that it wasn't a date. At least, not in the true sense. The last thing he needed was for Addison and Holly to become angry at his choosing these other women over Amanda to take out.

But then Ryan caught him at dinner with Eva Wooley.

The renowned Scream Queen of Cinema called the actor over.

If only Thomas had not been surreptitiously texting Amanda, he might have been able to come up with a plausible reason for being out with the actress.

"Well, well." Ryan grinned at the two. "Isn't this a cozy booth?"

"Why don't you join us?" Thomas insisted.

The idea of having to sit through another hour or so of Eva saying what he would need to do in order to keep her satisfied in a relationship was grating upon his nerves. He would gladly latch onto Ryan as a lifeline and use him to get out of the restaurant.

"I suppose I could sit down for a minute or so." Ryan quirked an eyebrow at Thomas's silent pleading while Eva puffed up in irritation.

"I only wanted to say, hi, Ryan. Don't let us keep you." Eva grumbled. "We are only trying to have a romantic dinner. Aren't we Tommy?"

Gritting his teeth, he corrected her for the fifth time. "Thomas."

"Romantic dinner, huh?" Ryan didn't bother to hide his surprise. "You two are an item? Since when?"

"Tommy called me...how long ago?" Eva cooed.

"Nearly three weeks ago." Thomas glanced down when his phone vibrated.

Reading Amanda saying that she missed him brought a smile to his lips.

Ryan craned his neck to see what he was doing. Catching Amanda's name on the director's screen, he settled back with a relieved smirk. Now he could have some fun.

"So?" Ryan rubbed his hands together. "What's next for you two crazy lovebirds?"

Thomas's head jerked up. "What?"

"I have a few ideas." Eva leaned forward with a sultry smile.

"Heh." Ryan choked down his laughter. "I can tell when I'm not wanted."

Thomas grabbed his arm and yanked him back down. "Nonsense! Eve was just--"

"Eva!" She snapped.

"...asking about our upcoming movie." Thomas continued, ignoring the lithe beauty's irritated outburst.

"I don’t care about your movie." She huffed. “It sounds boring.” Her eyes narrowed when his attention drifted down to his lap again. "What are you looking at?"

Ryan coughed in his drink. "Yeah, Tommy? What are you looking at?"

"Excuse me, a moment." Thomas slipped out of the booth and headed toward the bar.

Along the way, he called Amanda.

"You know, you don't have to call just because I send a text." Amanda teased. "I promise my feelings won't be hurt."

"I wanted to." Thomas sat down and ordered a scotch. "I'm surprised you're awake at this hour."

"Ah, that would be Nadia's doing. She is determined I be fitted with new ballgowns. She also insists we start the morning fittings bright and early. If she wasn't so sweet, I would be calling her horrible names by now."

"Nadia?" He paused in sipping his drink. "So things between you and Maxwell..."

"There's nothing there." Amanda explained. "No lingering longing or wishful thinking. Nothing but friendship."

He didn't realize how relieved he would feel, knowing she truly didn't have feelings for anyone back home.

"Good. I--" he hesitated, "I didn't want you to suffer with a lost love."

Her chuckle brought a smile to his lips.

"That is very sweet of you." She settled back against her bed pillows. "It sounds busy wherever you are. Big night on the town?"

"Just dinner out." He corrected. "Dining at home hasn't been the same since you left."

"I've had Drake here since I came home." She explained. "He didn't want to be part of the rush of preparing for the social season at the palace." A slight blush stained her cheeks. "Even with Drake here, offering to cook and all...I miss our meals together." A slightly nervous laugh escaped her. "He never wants to talk movies or books with me."

"That is a shame." Thomas glanced up and saw his furious date storming over. "Amanda, let me call you back."

"Of course--"

He quickly ended the call before she finished speaking.

"What in the hell are you doing over here?!" Eva hissed.

Thomas held up his glass and shook it. "I needed a drink."

"Our waitress would have brought it to our table." She leaned closer to whisper. "You're embarrassing me in front of everyone here!" She gestured toward the people looking at them. "Do you know that I am trending on Twitter with the #barbeatsEva?!"

"I don't understand a word you said in that last sentence." He shrugged. "I needed to make a phone call. But now that you mention it, I should leave." He paid for his drink then went back to their table.

"You are not leaving!" Eva sniped, hot on his heels. "You are going to sit down, order dessert and act like you are falling in love with me! I will not allow my fans to believe you prefer sitting alone at a bar to my company!"

He laid down a few hundred dollar bills for their server, then turned to face his date.

Thomas wondered what possessed him a year ago to even consider getting to know such a shallow creature. All she had done was talk about herself from the moment they met up this evening. She didn't care what he liked, nor was remotely interested in anything about himself.

"I suppose this explains why I decided to step behind the camera." He replied. "I'll never be a good enough actor to convince anyone here that I even like you."

Eva stood there with her jaw dropped before swiping up her things and hurrying after him.

********************

The next morning, he came downstairs to find Holly and Addison completely livid.

"Is something wrong?" He asked, already feeling a sense of trepidation at their silence.

Addison tossed one magazine after another down on the kitchen counter.

He blanched at the photos of him with different women splashed on the covers.

Holly held up her iPad and hit play.

"In Entertainment News, Thomas Hunt has abandoned his seclusion with a bang! Ever since Amanda Bridgerton completed the screen play of The Earl's Undoing, the reclusive director has been making up for lost time. He has been seen on romantic nights out with several actresses and personalities. Could one of these be his next personal leading lady? Sources close to--"

"How could you?!" Addison cried out. "Amanda is in love with you! She admitted it the night we took her out and she drank too much. And then you just go out with people like Eva, Gina, Kerri, and too many that I can’t stand! And Simone? Really, Thomas? Of all the people in Hollywood, you chose them?!"

He stilled. "Amanda said she was in love with me?"

"You could have been with Amanda all this time." Holly shook her head, not bothering to hide how disappointed she was. "But you chose these superficial women instead." She turned her back on him. "I hope they were worth it. Now Amanda will probably find some noble or diplomat and quickly settle for him to keep from letting us know her heart is broken."

He searched his pocket for his phone. "I'll explain to her why I did this."

"What possessed you to go out with them?" Holly asked.

"Because I--" he frowned when his call went to voicemail. "I wanted to make certain my feelings for Amanda were strictly for her and not just because I was lonely." He grimaced when his call went unanswered again. "I didn't want to start something with Amanda unless I knew I was completely committed to her."

"Oh." Addison's glare slowly dissolved. "Couldn't you have figured it out a different way?"

He briefly closed his eyes, refusing to snap at her. He sent a few texts pleading that Amanda call him.

Ryan's appearance in his home caused the three to jump in surprise.

The actor cocked an eyebrow in question. "What? Didn't you tell me to come over first thing to try on my costumes?"

"I completely forgot!" Addison sent her own text to Amanda.

Holly shushed Ryan while she too begged Amanda to pick up her phone.

"What's wrong?" Ryan noticed the magazine's. "Oh."

"She's not answering anything." Thomas dropped his phone on the counter and lowered his head.

"I'll try her home!" Addison stepped away from them and called St Orella. "Mr. Hudson. Hi! It's Addison. I was wondering if I could speak to Amanda."

Ryan shook his head. "She's even ignoring my text."

Thomas ran his hands down his face. "Perhaps she is busy and hasn't had a chance to see these yet."

"Oh." Addison's shoulders slumped with Hudson's explanation. "I understand. I'll try again later. Thank you." She set her phone down and sank into a chair. "She's home but unable to come to the phone."

The group of friends remained silent, each trying to think of a way to fix this.

For the first time in his life, Thomas was at a complete loss.

#and then i left you #thomas hunt #choices red carpet diaries #choices the royal romance #thomas hunt x oc #choices thomas hunt #thomas hunt x amanda #thomas hunt rcd #rcd thomas hunt #trr drake #drake walker #trr maxwell #maxwell beaumont x nadia park #maxwell beaumont #trr #and then i met you

[classic80sand90smovieloves2]

Spike having a crush on you would include~

(Not my gif)(sort of requested by anonymous)

(Spike was one of my first crushes and he will forever hold a spot in my heart)

- The entirety of your relationship: Enemies to lovers, slow burn, 500k words.

- When Spike falls in love he falls hard. For him it’s not just a simple crush, he is absolutely irrevocably in love with you.

- You’d have to be someone who he’s occasionally forced to interact with whether that be a friend of Buffys or a hunter yourself. At the start of your “relationship” you hate each other and for good reason but then one moment he sees you in a different light and it’s all over for him.

- After that he’s more or less hopelessly devoted to you.

- Lets make one thing clear: he makes it very difficult for you to get rid of him. You could absolutely hate him and he’d still force you to be around him, like showing up to your job where you can’t turn him away or barging in on something you can’t make a scene at.

- He’s kind of a masochist especially when it comes to you. Beat him up, be aggressively sarcastic, tell him to shut up; he likes it.

- But as much as he likes aggression he’d also flock to a woman who treats him kindly when no one else does. If you were to show him the smallest bit of affection or kindness he would gravitate towards you whenever you were around.

- He really wants to get on your good side and be respected by you. He can’t help but tell you how he thinks him doing this or that should count for something and that you could at least be friendly to him even if you hated him.

- A lot of his decisions are fueled by how many good boy points he’ll get. Praise is honestly like a drug to him and he thinks a lot of the things he does deserves praise since he used to be evil.

- He very proudly tells you about the good deeds he did with Buffy.

- You’re the only thing that keeps him doing good and holding on. You’re the reason he can keep himself together in even the toughest of situations.

- He gets a bit shy at times, unsure of what to say around you and not wanting to make a fool of himself. Other times he’d get all sarcastic and tease you, trying to deflect from how he really feels or how much your annoyance by him bothers him.

- If you were to blatantly show your distaste for him, he’d insist that he never liked you anyway and try his best to insult you although they’d always be weak.

- He gets really defensive about things involving you or how he feels.

- After he gets embarrassed he just tends to turn around and walk off, not wanting to “make a fool of himself” any longer than he has to.

- He’s very protective. Even if he previously hated or wanted you dead, he couldn’t bear to see you hurt. He’d go after anyone who made you upset or injured you.

- Always tries his best to comfort you even though he hardly remembers how it feels to be human and have human emotions. He’s out of touch but he’ll give it a shot; patting your back and/or assuring you everything will be okay. The first few times around it will definitely be weird having him try but you’ll get used to it.

- He uses any excuse he can to visit you or make you invite him over.

- Makes up stories to get you to come over to his house and hang out with him because he doesn’t think you’d agree to be around him if he didn’t.

- Very affected by the thought of you naked or in some form of undress.

- Steals your clothes or pictures of you, like genuinely breaks into your house and steals them. Look he doesn’t exactly have a moral code, alright?

- He’s moody and obsessed and morally gray; but he’s a vampire without a soul so don’t hold him to his actions too much.

- Would he write poetry about you and his feelings? Yes. Would it be awful? Maybe, but never to you if you were to read it.

- Opens doors for you, walks between you and the street, offers you his coat when it’s cold. Chivalry may just be dead after all.

- Chances are, you’ll know he likes you way before he admits it and/or the two of you end up together. He can’t help but show how obviously into you he is.

- He gets very jealous when another man is around you. He’ll blatantly insult your boyfriends, male friends, or some guy that’s hit on you.

- He plays dumb when you question him about his feelings or actions, not wanting you to catch on to how he really feels in fear of rejection.

- Everyone thinks you’re dating from the way he acts with you. He always has this pleased smile on his face after they say something in regards to your “relationship”.

- He gives you such fond loving looks, especially when you aren’t looking at him.

- Nicknames, most of them will annoy you.

- Using the excuse that he’s training you to fight/defend yourself to get close to you.

- He thinks nearly everything you do is cute. Anything that shows just how mortal and naive; compared to hundred year old immortals, is precious to him.

- He falls way too easily for your flirting. You could sound so sarcastic but he’d still just love hearing you say the words, even if he knew you weren’t serious. A part of him would still hold on to the hope that you were.

- Everyone else is aware of his feelings for you and what he’s trying to accomplish even if you aren’t. They try to get him to leave you alone but they’ll never succeed.

- He would try to use his accent to his advantage after hearing about how women like english/british men. He’d probably try to get Buffy to tell him if you happened to like accents and she’d just give him this warning look.

- Raised eyebrows and smirks are a very common method of flirting for him.

- Playing with your hair is also a common flirtation/intimidation method, whenever he can get away with it that is.

- Sometimes he would just flat out flirt and try to proposition you without any subtly. If you react negatively then he’ll just tell you to “take a joke” or undo his words by saying something rude.

- He lies awake every “night” thinking of you, he just can’t get you off his mind. His dreams are invaded by thoughts of you whenever he does manage to sleep.

- He imagines being with you all the time. Daydreams; or rather nightdreams I suppose, about a relationship with you and the idea of you loving him just as much as he loves you.

- Being around you is honestly torment for him. Not having you for himself is absolute torture. At times he’d feel as though he’d rather die than live in a world with you and he wouldn’t be afraid to tell it to your face.

- He would do anything to make you love him. Whatever change he could make, he’d make. Whatever thing he could do, he’d do. He’d go to the ends of the earth to find something, become something, that would make you want him to be yours.

“What wouldn’t a man do to be hers?”

- He insists he’s changed; that he can be good and that if you’d just give him a chance you’d see.

- He’d genuinely cry if you rejected him, especially if you did it cruelly. He loves you too much to stand it.

- How he would ultimately confess all depends on the kind of person you are or the circumstances you’re under.

- At times he would just try to kiss you instead of verbally telling you how he feels. He might have to try a few times before you realize what he’s trying to do or before he gets it right.

- Other times he would just confess. He’d tell you he loves you straight off the bat. There oftentimes isn’t a lot of debating on whats the best thing he could say to express his feelings, he just goes straight for it and moves on from there.

- And then there would be the times that he would indirectly show his feelings and finally confess with a hopeful question.

“A DATE?! YOU ARE OFF YOUR BIRD I MEAN, do you want it to be?”

- If you were silent or not keen on him liking you, he’d try to rationalize his feelings and how it isn’t strange for you to fall for each other. He’d insist there’s something between you and; more often than not, you can’t deny it.

#buffy the vampire slayer #spike #spike imagine #spike headcanons #spike headcanon #buffy the vampire slayer headcanons #buffy the vampire slayer imagine #buffy the vampire slayer imagines #buffy the vampire slayer headcanon #90s tv show #90s imagine #90s tv show headcanons #90s tv headcanons #90s tv show imagine #90s tv series

[a-girl-must-have-a-new-name]

When Jon had first met Gendry he had taken an instant liking to him. Maybe it was because Starks and Baratheons were always meant to be friends. Or maybe it was because there was something about being two bastards thrust into roles they never thought they’d have to worry about that brought them close. All Jon knew though was that he wanted Gendry by his side. He trusted him as much as Davos and that meant a great deal.

Still it was hard to remember all of that when you catch the man you’ve been calling a friend sneaking out of your younger sister’s bedroom early in the morning.  Jon could only watch on in complete silence As Arya his sweet wild young sister pulled Gendry back into the doors threshold long enough to place a kiss on his lips quickly before shutting the door on Gendry’s stupid face. Jon moved out of the way not wanting to be seen, as he had to control his conflicted emotions. On one hand Jon wanted to use longclaw right then and there to run through Gendry. On the other hand Jon knew he was being a hypocrite. Hadn’t he done the same with Ygritte? With Danny? The threat of the white walkers loomed over them and no one could say confidently how long they had for this world so who was he to stop his beloved sister from any happiness she could receive?  

Besides he knew Gendry’s worth. He was a good man, a good friend. And he had known of Gendry’s and Aryas’ history. well only a little bit. Neither mentioned much of their time together, only that they wouldn’t have been alive if it wasn’t for the other. But obviously there was more to it than that. 

So Jon began watching them. Watched when Arya, who was so different from the little girl he’d left behind. Who seemed to carry all the darkness and secrets of the world on her shoulders, would smile and joke easily when Gendry was around. Jon was glad to see that, that easy happy nature was still in her. He watched how the sullen look that seemed permanently etched on Gendry’s dirty face would instantly melt away as Arya drew close. The looks of adoration and protectiveness he sent her way told Jon all he needed to know. However that didn’t stop him from needing to hear it for himself. 

“You, I need to talk to you.”  Gendry stiffened for only a minute as he felt the weight of Jon’s hand on his shoulder. Looking around to see the concern etched on his king's face Gendry could only nod in agreement.  Instructing the men working tirelessly in the forge to continue on with making the dragon glass weapons, he followed Jon out into the biting cold. 

Jon was silent for a while instead of speaking out right he opted to walk with Gendry inspecting the on goings of the castle as he did. Pausing now that they were alone overlooking their surroundings at a gate post Jon caught Gendry smiling to himself.  

“What’s got you laughing?” 

“Just how similar you and your sister are.” Gendry watched as Jon’s eyes softened, at the comparison of his beloved sister. However Jon held back his smile as he forced his famous scowl and eyed his friend warily

“I hope not too similar, after all as much as I like you Gendry I don’t want you in my bed.”  At Gendry's sputtering and choking  Jon had to turn away to keep from chuckling. 

“I- Your grace it’s not. I mean” Gendry was panic stricken looking around wildly whether for a trap, or even a possible escape route Jon didn’t know but he held back his smile for a few more moments enjoying his friends' panic. However when it looked like Gendry was contemplating jumping over the wall to get away from him Jon finally gave him mercy.   

“It’s fine Gendry. Am I happy it happened like this? No. but I won’t try to stop you two. Besides it’s clear to me how close you two are.  You said that Arya and I are similar, correct?” at Gendry’s nod Jon continued. 

“Yes we are similar, but it’s always been more than that. Arya’s been the one person that I could always count on, the only one I’ve ever been able to be completely honest with and up until now I thought it was the same for her.” 

“I-” Gendry was struggling to come up with words however Jon continued on knowing he had to get this off his chest. 

“But I know now that it’s not. I can’t begin to imagine what the both of you went through together. Nor what Arya dealt with while she was in Braavos. I know my sister well enough to know that those are things she will keep from Sansa and myself, and won’t dare speak with Bran about. But  She trusts these secrets to you Gendry. So I will trust you with her.” 

“I promise I have no intention to ever leave her or hurt her again my king.”

“I believe you Gendry and I am happy that it’s you she’s chosen. But be warned if we all survive this, you two will have to tell Sansa about what you two have been doing and I suspect she will be less accepting than I am. At the very least a wedding will be demanded.” 

“Oh she knows already.” Gendry spoke with such casualty, Jon wondered if he had misheard him.

“She knows?”

“Yes, she uh- she caught us a few weeks ago.” 

“Weeks ago?” Jon wondered just how long he had missed the signs,  He tried to ignore the annoying thought that came to him suddenly along with the memory of Ygritte’s laugh, yes it felt like she was laughing at him even now. 

“Yes, she actually handled it even better than you, I think the only thing she was truly upset about was the fact that she caught us in the grain room. Complained about contaminating the food preserves.” Gendry laughed as he patted Jon on the back walking away from the stunned man.  Not realizing his revelation left Jon mortifyingly paralyzed. It wasn’t until breakfast the next day when Danny questioned why he hadn’t touched his meal, on top of her overall concerns over his general tiredness that Jon  could come out of his stupor. Though only because he could hear the low chuckle of Sansa sitting across from him. 

He blinked blearily at his half sister, trying to ignore the mounting headache he was becoming oh so familiar with when dealing with Sansa. Who for her own part smiled deviously at him as she passed half of her food over to him. 

“Yes Jon eat up, we can't have you losing your strength. Right Arya? It would be horrible for Jon to train today on an empty stomach, yes?” 

Arya, who up until that moment was not so secretly flirting with Gendry from across the hall, turned to look at the two of them studying Sansa’s mischief and Jon’s discomfort before grinning wolfishly herself. 

“Of course, only some one stupid would train on an empty stomach. Also Jon I know for a fact that this meal was made with a little extra love, so you should really try and finish it.” Jon, who had taken a sip of ale in a feeble attempt to deflect began to suddenly choke, gasping for breath as Arya ignored him and continued. “ Wouldn’t want to hurt the cook’s feelings.”

“They’re right Jon.” Danny addressed giving him a stern once over, “You shouldn’t waste this food. Especially with how little everyone has.”  Jon exasperatedly looked around the room. Bran was sitting at the opposite end of the table being of absolutely no help yet looked suspiciously as though he too was in on it and enjoying the show. Looking out into the hall he spotted Gendry, who had clearly been trying to listen in and at least had the decency to blush before shrugging his shoulders as if to say “Eh what can you do?”

 Jon feeling like a petulant child brought the gruel closer towards him as he pushed the food around with his spoon waiting for a chance to toss it to Ghost. As he waited he thought that maybe going up against the Night King wouldn’t be so bad, he’d have to be more merciful than this lot.  

  Arya having had her fun and seeing that Jon was at his limit rose asking Sansa and Danny to join her. Claiming she wanted to train with them for a bit. Both women readily agreed,  all thoughts of food wasting forgotten.  Relief and gratitude flowed through Jon. This was why Arya would always be his favorite. He silently nodded his head in thanks to her. She winked at him before turning away, as they stood to leave Sansa turned to Jon once more. 

“If you must know, I had the bags they were rolling around on removed.”  Jon looked skeptically at the bowl before him before turning to eye Sansa. Jon eyed her searching for deception when he felt secure enough that her words were the truth he took a giant spoonful, then another. It wasn’t good at all but food was food. Sansa, satisfied to see her brother eating, began to leave wanting to catch up with Arya and Danny. Only pausing long enough to say one final thing. Mirth glinting in her tully eyes. 

“Honestly, Jon it’s not that big of a deal, at least you aren’t Bran, imagine he has to tune them out all the time. Why just the other day he caught them in your room.”

“Excuse me?!” Jon spat out gruel flying across the table as he looked accusingly towards Gendry who had suspiciously disappeared right after Arya. Looking towards Bran only to have his brother stare back blankly at him, giving nothing away. Jon cursed, pushing himself out from the table and away from the hall looking for longclaw. Forget what he had said last night. He was going to kill both Gendry and Arya, favorite sister be damned.   

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I did it! didn’t think I’d get it done to be honest.I won’t lie  I’m very happy with the way it turned out. just wanted something light and fun to get me back in the mood again! Hope y’all enjoyed it as well!  

#gendrya fic #Gendrya fanfiction #jon snow #jon snow fic #Sansa Stark #Arya Stark #Jon and Arya #daenerys targaryen #bran stark #Gendry Waters #arya x gendry #game of thrones #game of thrones fic #ASoIaF #no danny vs the stark girls here #no mad queen #just love and jon torment #which is always fun #arya stark fanfic #Stark Family #everyone is out to tease jon

[cursedlemonade]

To The Sun chapters 1-5

FIRST DRAFT of To The Sun. go easy on me here

Chapter I

“Are you crazy?!” I was carrying a child, maybe six or seven years old. I didn't respond to them, only roughly handing the kid to one of the many bystanders watching the whole scene unfold. It should have been simple. There was a house fire, we went in to get the woman trapped inside. It was routine for us to rescue people, we were called the Guardians for a reason. “Rose, are you okay?” Atlas got up in my face. Ashes sticking to their face and small pieces settling on strands of their blonde hair. On the way out a board had fallen onto my arm, I didn't dare look at it. It hurt to breathe, I was still coughing so it wasn't like I could talk. My arm felt like it had been set on fire along with the building. They caught me by my arms, releasing me to fall to the ground when I yelped from the pain.

“That looks bad.” a man said. He came to stand at our sides while Atlas sank to their knees to try and help me. 

“No shit.” Atlas mumbled it, only loud enough for me to hear. I could tell they wanted to snap at the man, but that was a sure fire way to get screamed at by someone in a couple of days. 

“Is he okay?” I choked on my own words, making them barely audible. God, I can't let another person die like that, not after everything. I was blocking out the pain, I was worried about that little boy. He bit me when I first picked him up, I still had the mark on my thumb. 

“He’s going to be fine, some smoke inhalation but not much of it.”

We had gotten the woman out of the blaze, but she was unconscious. It wasn't until we were leaving the building that I heard a child cry for help. Atlas was my partner, and I gave them no warning that I was going back in. I had lost enough people lately, I wasn't ready to let someone lose their child. Especially not when it was because we were not fast enough. 

“Can you stand?” Atlas kept eye contact, taking one of their hands to lift my head to keep my eyes on them. I nodded, though I'm not sure how far my legs would have carried me. A few seconds later I leaned forward, resting my head on their shoulder. My breathing was heavy, I had barely been able to breathe for five minutes. “I'm carrying you, you won't make it all the way back to Algiz and we need to get your arm looked at as soon as possible.” 

“That was so stupid!” Archer said from the doorway, leaning on the frame. “I can't believe you risked that much! You could have died!” I wanted to laugh, he was right.

“She saved a life, Archer, calm down.” Alana was sitting next to me, treating the blackened and blistering burn on my upper arm. She calmly wrapped the cloth around my arm, careful not to put too much pressure on it. “I’m not exactly happy she went in there without Atlas either, but you have to think about the situation. You know you would have done the same thing.” 

“I would have told Atlas where I was going.” Archer was pacing between my bed and the doorway, clearly frustrated and worried. I knew he would be, I was his best friend. 

“It wasn't that bad.” Atlas cut in from their seat next to me, letting me squeeze their hand while Alana finished her work. “I was busy, I wouldn't have been able to go in any way.” Atlas wasn't really ‘busy’, they were just checking on the woman we had pulled out of the fire. She was unconscious, we were in the middle of nowhere and no one knew anyone in the house. We had no way of knowing that there was a child until he screamed. I still remember that rush I got. There was no hesitation, I just turned around and ran back inside. Bad idea from everyone else's point of view, but I would rather die than let a child burn to death. 

“Can someone please explain to me what on earth even happened?” Archer yelled, frustration clear in his voice. “All I got was that Rose ran into a burning building and she didn't have any backup.”

“So you're yelling at an injured girl when you don't know the full story?” Alana chuckled and rolled her eyes. “I didn't get much else either. It was Atlas and Rose who were there.” her voice was naturally much higher than archers, but still lower than mine. She always had a certain tone in her voice that made her equally as approachable and terrifying. She seemed so calm, but you could tell she wouldn't hesitate to hurt you. 

“I'm worried! I don't know!” Archer yelled back, moving to stand in front of me and look me over. I was covered in ash and dirt, along with a little bit of blood. I had a few small burns and bruises, but other than the big one on my arm I was okay. He grabbed under my chin and moved my head around a bit to check over my face. I laughed, I thought it was nice that he worried about me, but this was a little much. I'm sure I looked worse than I actually was though. 

“Crystal is going to kill both of you if she sees you touching her face, at all,” Atlas said, letting go of my hand as Alana put my arm down. Atlas was there with me, they were one of my closest friends too. I was close to everyone in the room, and I was more than happy that my three best friends were the only ones there while I looked like I was going to die. That's how Archer was reacting anyway. Atlas looked annoyed with Archer’s behavior, and honestly, I was too. 

“I think this is a special situation. It's not like I'm kissing her.”

“If you kiss me I'm going to break your jaw.'' I smiled up at him, trying to reassure him I was okay. Archer and I grew up together, we were incredibly close and I think we always will be. We both grew up in Maxten, a small town in the western mountains. I say small town, but it was more like a collection of villages that formed a central city. We lived off of the forest and rarely got any help from others. We loved our little society, but we were constantly plagued with war and infighting. 

When we were kids, Echia had only recently become a country. It was barely five years old. Borders were still being disputed, especially Maxten. We split off from Tristain, who was in our west. They claimed that they had Maxten, to which our former queen serenity said that it was stated that echia owned maxten. She came to Maxten a few times, asking if we wanted to be part of Triastin so that there wouldn't be any more conflict. A majority of us said no, but she was willing to hand us over to preserve lives. I understood it. 

Conflict still happened though, Triastin and Echia troops marching through our streets was a common sight, fights and death were also fairly common. My own father fell victim to a battle in the streets. We were the one place that knew how to fight, most parents trained all of their children to fight. we needed to know that living in the mountains, to begin with. Eventually, a lot of us got sick of it and started to plan to fight back. We were part of Echia, whether Triastin liked it or not. Men and women together, along with quite a few teenagers, managed to push Triastin troops out of our city completely. That's when Triastin gave up when they realized they were getting push back from the people. Echia was already becoming known as a force to be reckoned with because of how many of us fought in the civil war that gave us our country, our queen being blessed by Isa herself, and how well she kept herself together after her son was assassinated. We were the ones to start to break gender norms back when we were still part of Triastin, back when women stayed home and the men fought. When Serenity stepped up to lead and her people followed, it changed people. Of course, in places like Lacrynes and Bleotha, it was still an issue, but it was better now. In Othala it was never a problem, the people farther south never saw a separation over your gender. I couldn't imagine growing up in a world where men and women were treated as different species. 

A few months prior we were alerted to a fire in Maxten that seemed to spread remarkably fast. Some people blamed mountain guardians, dragon-like creatures. But even if they were the fire god's guardians, they had no abilities of that sort. My people worshipped him mostly, and we were always blessed by him and his remaining guardians. They were thought to be extinct, but we knew they weren't. We had all seen one. We were called in late when as guardians we should have been the first ones alerted. We existed to deal with emergencies, our whole faction existed to help people. We were almost always dispatched to deal with these things, why was it so different? When we got there we could see royal guards, palace guards. They came from the same place but they had already been there for hours. 

There were seven survivors. Many of them said that the fire seemed to have started around the river, which was what was cutting off the spread of the fire, but also cutting off the escape. Most of the survivors were children, led by a teacher. I had an older brother and a sister-in-law. They had a son who was seven, and we found no sign of any of them. 

I remembered falling to my knees in front of the river, the light from the fire reflecting off of the surface of the water turning everything a golden hue. I started crying, as silently as I could. I felt like a failure, even though it wasn't our fault we were late to that fire. I remember Crystal hugging me, and I let her. Even though we nearly hated each other, she still chose to comfort me. She chose to comfort me, even though her lover also had family in Maxten. He wasn't fond of them, but they were still his family. 

“So what happened?” Alana asked calmly, pushing me slightly to sit back down on my bed. Her voice snapped me back to reality. She picked her basket up off of the floor and started collecting the numerous ointments and rags off of the bench I had been sitting on. “You two were the ones there.”

Chapter II

“You scared me so bad, Rose.''Archer sat down next to me with a heavy breath. It upset me that he was so distressed over an injury that was ultimately minor. Yes, the initial action was stupid and risky, but a burn on my arm wasn't as bad as it could have been. He worried about me a little bit too much. 

“I know, I'm sorry.” 

“I'm proud that you saved him though. You risked your life though, and you got hurt.” 

“We’ve run into burning buildings before, we both know I would have been fine.” his expression softened. He had slight bags under his eyes, some wisps of his dirty blonde hair hung in front of his face. I knew I had worried him, he had become increasingly more overprotective of me since the disaster that took our families. 

“That was before Maxten. You came in here sobbing, and not from your arm. You don't cry from physical pain anymore.” well he was right about one thing when I get hurt I swear, I don't cry. After we made sure everything was okay, and that the mother and son were safe it hit me that we very well could have just saved two people from the same fate my mother and brother had to suffer through. 

“I know, but I didn't let that get in the way at that moment. It only hit me afterward.” he paused for a moment and sighed. 

“I trust you not to get yourself killed, but that really scared me. Please be more careful next time, or at least give whoever you're with some kind of warning. Eye contact isn't a warning.” 

“I know, but I kind of panicked.”

“I understand that. Do you want someone to stay up with you tonight? You know as well as I do you're not going to be able to sleep for a little while.” That was true, I had been having nightmares pretty often since the disaster at maxten. Running into a fire wouldn't have helped a streak of nightmares about the exact same thing. 

“Maybe. I don't want you getting in trouble with your girlfriend.” Archer and I never had feelings for each other. Even in childhood, there were never children's crushes on each other like half our friends expected. We just didn't click like that, and most people understood it. Keyword, most. His girlfriend hates me, she thought I was trying to take him from her. She was clingy in her own right, borderline controlling sometimes. He loved her though, and she made him happy. I wanted him to be happy, he was my best friend. I understand why Crystal thought there was a connection between us, the way Archer acted around me sometimes gave that impression. Like the times he would run to me after a battle just to grab me by my shoulders and make sure I was okay. Then again, I would do the same for him. That rarely happened, but the few times Crystal saw it she took it in the way most people probably would. We explained to her multiple times that it just wasn't the case, I had even explained that I had feelings for another member of the guardians, and definitely not him. 

Archer and I sat down in the small commons room. Three long benches were surrounding a table. Three or four people could fit on each bench, making it easy for 12 people. There were only six of us though, so normally it wasn't too crowded. This time it was all four of us who were home. Atlas sat facing the fireplace on the wall, their heels resting on the table. Alana sat across from us, taking the leather brace off of her left wrist to get ready for bed. Atlas already looked half asleep, and all of us were urging them to go to bed. Archer sat next to me, watching as I stared at the fire. 

“Well, I'm going to bed before I pass out over here,” Alana said, getting up and walking by Atlas. She hit them lightly in the head, before yelling at them to go to bed. They got up, more like they stumbled up, and followed Alana down the hall. Archer got up and walked to the kitchen, opening a cupboard and getting up on his toes to reach. 

“Do you want anything?” 

“Do you have any dried fruit?” he chuckled, grabbing something from the top shelf and tossing it over at me. I looked down in my lap to see some dried pears in a small glass container. “This is in glass, why did you throw it at me?” I laughed, taking the top off and taking a bite. 

“Because I would have laughed way too hard if it hit you in the head. The sound it makes is great.”

“Not if it breaks!” he turned to me and smiled, grabbing some sunflower seeds from the lower shield and shutting the cupboard. The room was warm, Atlas’s paintings covered the walls, some of them painted directly onto the wall while others were hung up and painted on canvas or wood. I remembered walking in from patrols with Robyn or Thorn and seeing Atlas sitting cross-legged on the floor with a palette on their knee, paint on their hands and face as they painted a river or a sunset. A few of Alana’s paintings were there too, but she was much more gifted in embroidery or writing. She could describe something so well you would feel like you were there. Once, I asked her to write down what she noticed about an old Acristan ruin when she had to move through it. She wrote down everything, describing every single detail. Of course, Atlas tried to draw it and got incredibly close despite never being there. Alana could spend hours writing a description of the texture of a wall. A majority of the books on her bookshelf were all journals. 

All of us had parts of ourselves in this room, be that something more noticeable like a massive painting on the wall, or something as simple as an old key Crystal found in her room under her nightstand. Personally, I didn't have much. Most of what this room would remember me by were dumb stuff I had done, like when I fell and cut open my arm on the wall. There was still a stain on the corner, even though we had tried to get rid of it. Crystal was the one who convinced us to leave it saying it told a story. The story was that I was chasing Thorn with a spider and I tripped over air. My head hurt so bad after that, and Thorn felt so bad. 

“How are you feeling?” Archer asked, sitting back down next to me. 

“Better. My arm doesn't hurt that bad anymore. Alana did well.”

“Has she ever done badly? She’s skilled.” We both turned as we heard the front door open, and saw Thorn walk in. He had dark spots on his clothing from the light rain, blue cloth over his face, and bags under his eyes. His hair was messy and his eyes had dulled from their normal bright blue. 

“Tired?” I asked with a smile, getting up to take his coat from him. I knew he was exhausted, it was drawn all over his face. I wondered what kind of stories he would be able to tell, but he would be able to wait until morning. 

“I had quite a day.” Archer got up too, watching as I walked over to the hooks on the back wall and hung up Thorn's coat for him. Thorn sat down on the bench across from where Archer and I had been sitting. His shoulders sank as he pulled the cloth down away from his face, revealing a new bruise on his jaw. 

“Got hurt again huh?” I asked, walking back over to the seating area. Most times I would have jumped over the back of the bench and awkwardly landed to sit down, but with one of my arms half out of the function, I made the decision that it probably wasn't a good idea. 

“I see you didnt have amazing luck either.'' I laughed, but Archer didn't seem to find it that funny. I liked Thorn, he always made me laugh, but we weren't close. He seemed closer to Crystal, they had very similar political beliefs. Archer was also a little jealous, but at least he didn't take it out on Thorn as Crystal took it out on me. He saw that he had me, so Crystal should be allowed to have Thorn. It still frustrated him though. 

“Well this was my fault.” the fire crackled, making u all look down at it for a split second. I stared for a few seconds before Thorn's voice snapped me out of the rabbit hole my brain was going down. 

“Is it a cut or what?”

“It's a burn. It should be healed in a few weeks.”

“Well, it's better than blood loss. I fell, so this is my fault too.” For a moment I wondered what he fell down, but knowing him he probably tripped over nothing and fell into a rover or down a set of stairs. That's one thing Thorn and I had in common: we could run through thousand-year-old ruins and be fine, but fall in the grass and break an ankle. 

“Is that why you're back so late?”

“Yeah.” he sighed. “You know Crystal is going to be pissed if she comes back and you two are sitting next to each other right? I don't see anything wrong with it but she will see it as confirmation.”

“Speaking of which, do you know when they’ll be back? I want to talk to Robyn.”

“Yeah, stay alone in a room with him for a few hours and that will evaporate Crystal’s suspicions.” sarcasm rang in his voice, a joking smile appearing on his face. “But no, they were supposed to be back tonight too but a storm is heading in from the south so they're probably being held back.” 

“Dammit. I miss him.” Archer looked down at me with a joking smirk on his face. “No. Not like that.” It definitely was like that. He knew it, Crystal knew it. I'm pretty sure everyone knew it. 

“You seem nervous.” Archer’s voice almost made me jump, I had been focusing too hard on the drawings. 

“I am,” Thorn responded, taking a breath. “The revolution in Kai is growing, I'm just worried this might turn into a real civil war.” 

“It’ll be fine, Thorn. We’ll figure this all out.” 

“You two still don't even know what side you're on.” he let out a laugh under his breath, but I knew he was serious and frustrated. 

“I want to stay neutral until something else happens.” I sighed, my voice had become much darker. I knew it had, and I wanted him to know this is something I didn't want to talk about. “I don't want to accidentally support the wrong side.” 

“I understand that Rose.” he took a deep breath. “I'm going to bed.”

Chapter III

I opened my eyes, groaning as the sun shone in through the window. I was laying on my stomach, holding my pillow in my arms while my head rested on the mattress. My room was warm, the stone walls were covered in Atlas’ sketches of Acristan ruins. On the back wall was a large bookshelf next to my desk. It was a dark oak wood with intricate little carvings and designs. We all had one similar to it, but each one had different objects resting on the shelves. My desk was a mess, a pile of books on one side, sketches and rubbings and other pieces of paper scattered around with my journal on top of it. Two more journals I had already filled sat in the corner, each handmade with leather covers. I learned how to book bind with Archer, though he never picked it up as a hobby like I did. I made Alana journals when I had time; she would fill them up quickly and said she liked looking over at her own bookcase and seeing the line of different types of stitches I used to secure the cover to the paper. 

I got up, quickly getting dressed in some casual wear. Casual for us anyway; Dark pants with a button up shirt. My sword was sitting next to my bookshelf, though if I left the building at all I was required to wear it on my hip. I had metal guards on my forearm that covered part of my wrist. We had to carry our weapons and wear them just in case. Just in case something went wrong during the day and we didn't have time to get ready. I didn't take it very seriously until Maxten, that's when I started to stay prepared everyday. Everyone else did too. They said the wrist guards were in case we had no time at all. We were trained to use them to block and even to attack in some situations. If you could ball up your fists the right way you can use the piece of metal that was supposed to protect your knuckles to cut someone. Only if you hit them hard enough to break the skin though. Either way, it's going to surprise them to get punched and a piece of metal will pierce their skin. Or you could use them to block hits, and how to keep ourselves steady. This training would usually come from someone who was an older member of the guardians, but due to Talia being paranoid, we didn't have any senior members. So the captain of the guard taught us, even though he was our age. 

The last set of guardians were suddenly ‘relieved of duty.’ It's suspected that Talia may have either not trusted them, or simply wanted a new set of guardians. For a few months the country was left without us, until they found Crystal sparring a group of guards in Algiz, and found Thorn a few weeks later in the tustin guard. They were both phenomenal warriors, especially for their age. I watched Crystal spar general Rowan and win once, though she had been practicing for a long time before that day. She was so tired when she got home she basically collapsed on her bed. Atlas and Alana were found together after dealing with a kidnapping situation, where Alana literally broke the man's skull. That woman had no fear. Atlas was the one who got the three kids out safe before the rest of the guards got there. Crystal was included, being called in to check it out. She always said that Alana had a fire in her eyes that she couldn't ignore, and that she refused to leave without Atlas at her side. Next was Robyn, who they found in bristol. Alana never said anything about what happened in Bristol, and he never told me so I don't know. All I know is that he quickly became one of the most reliable Guardians, to the point he was usually the one to transport messages from Talia. Archer and I were brought in next, being a mixture of Thorn and Alana's situations. We were both in the guard, I climbed the ranks quickly and was asked by Alana to join. I said I wasn't going without Archer, and she agreed. She told me a few months later she only let Archer come with me because she saw something of herself in me, and after hearing her story I kind of understood it. Kind of. 

I walked over to my desk and picked up the stack of books, looking over which ones I would need and which ones I wouldn't. One on the Acristan language, one on how their religion differed from ours, one on different ruins and materials used to build them… one of the books had a jumble of maps tucked between its pages. I put that one back on the desk, moving to put the others back on the bookshelf next to me. My desk was still covered in papers, and some of them were important so I would have to look through them all to decide where to put them. 

I heard someone clear their throat behind me and jumped. Needless to say they startled me. I was a bit too focused on what I was doing and had just woken up. I turned around to see Crystal standing in my doorway, a dead, stone cold look on her face. She also wore a cloth mask over her face when she was on duty, but it was pulled down to her neck.

“So what happened last night?” I knew that tone in her voice, I had gotten to know it all too well. Jealousy with a hint of anger and sadness. I groaned under my breath. Here we go again. 

“I got hurt, if you didn't notice.'' I lifted my right arm up, pointing at the bandage with my left. She rolled her eyes, leaning against the doorframe. The air in the room suddenly felt heavy and thick. It was almost suffocating. She was pissed. 

“I thought I told you to stay away from Archer.” she pushed some of her hair out of her face. It was long and blonde like Atlas’s, but a little more golden blonde than theirs. 

“And I thought I told you it wasn't like that; we grew up together. If we felt that way about each other, he wouldn't have started dating you. He's not that kind of person.” Maybe that was a little too far, and I regretted it as I said it. It was true though. Archer and I had joked about dating in our earlier life, but always admitted to each other we had no feeling towards each other. It annoyed me to no end that I wasn't allowed to befriend a man without everyone trying to make it seem like there is something more than friendship there. 

“I know he's not, and it's you that I'm worried about. You've got a pretty face and you're good at keeping secrets.” She took a few steps closer to me. She was a little taller than me, but not by much. I kept eye contact, looking into those ocean blue eyes of hers that pulled so many men and women. Here I thought she couldn't make me feel more uncomfortable. “This is my last warning. Stop ‘spending time’ with my lover.” 

“Leave it be, Crystal.” I smiled upon hearing Robyns voice. He was always there to help me out in these kinds of situations. I heard his footsteps approaching in the hall as Crystal cursed under her breath. Robyn stopped in the doorway, glancing at me before fixing his eyes on her. “They're just friends. It's not that deep.”

“I can't just leave it be! How would you feel if your girlfriend was around another man like that?” She turned around and approached him, but he didn't react at all. 

“If I had one, I really wouldn't mind it. I would trust her.”

“I trust Archer! I don't trust her!” he sighed, looking over at me. His eyes were partially lidded, heavy bags resting under his eyes. He brought his hand up to his face and pinched the bridge of his nose. 

“Crystal please, just drop it.” I don't understand why she still did this, I had admitted to her I had feelings for Robyn. I had also admitted to her that even if Archer did feel that way for me I would turn him down, and that I knew I didn't feel that way about him. At the same time though, I wasn't going to abandon my best friend because his girlfriend was a little crazy. Crystal muttered something under her breath and left, her footsteps echoing down the hall. That was over a lot faster than I thought it was going to be

“Well that was something.” I laughed, watching as Robyn took a few steps into the room. He closed the door behind him, turning to me with a tired smile. 

“I have been dealing with shit like that for a week.” he chuckled. “I am so sick of her. I can't understand how Archer stands it.'' I shrugged, an awkward smile spreading across my face. 

“To each their own?”

“I guess so. I'm sorry for not noticing earlier, normally I'm not far when she starts.” he turned to fully face me, glancing at my arm. I didn't even say anything, I just let him start asking questions. “What happened?”

“I'm going to assume you already know what happened.”

“I really don't, Alana told me to be careful of your arm and that's all.” 

“Well long story short, house fire, there was a kid and we didn't know, I went in to get him and got hurt.” He sighed, sitting down on my bed. “But I'm fine. I should be fully healed in a few weeks. It doesn't even hurt that bad anymore.'' I sat down next to him. 

“You're going to be the death of me, Rose.”

“I wouldn't be surprised.” Robyn smiled, relaxed and calm. He was home, finally.  

“Oh, I grabbed this for you on the way home.” He reached into his bag and pulled out a small hardcover book. The cover was leather with a small symbol, the symbol of Dagslys. It was a sun with seven flames coming off of it. “It's a newer translation of Victoria’s journal, you mentioned how your copy was pretty old. I saw it in Tustin and thought of you.” 

“Thank you!” I excitedly took the book from him, a wide smile spreading across my face. He smiled too, watching me flip through the pages and look them over. “I’ll have to read this later.” he had short blonde hair and honey brown eyes. I adored his eyes, they were beautiful. They were this beautiful golden honey color in the center that faded to a dark brown around the edges. 

“Do you want to come on a walk with me today?” he asked, his voice almost a hum. It was calming. Before I could respond we were interrupted by shouting. It was one distinct voice, screaming about something we couldn't even decipher from where we were. “That sounds like it's going great!'' We both got up and rushed to the commons.

Chapter IV

 Crystal was standing in the kitchen, shouting at Archer who was frozen in place. He was tapping his finger nervously on his thigh, his eyes were staring into the corner. He was trying hard to avoid eye contact.

“Look at me dammit! I'm talking to you!'' Alana was standing not far away, trying to speak. After a few moments of almost unintelligible yelling Alana finally got sick of it. Crystal’s face was red, her eyebrows tilted so far down her eyes had started to become hidden by her eyelids. Her eyebrows were a light brown, different from her blonde hair. 

“Will you shut up!” Alana was so much louder than Crystal could ever be without screeching. I wanted to go get Archer; I could tell he wasn't doing well, but Robyn held me back. He grabbed my arm, causing me to turn to him. He was upset by this too. He wasn't as close to Archer as I was, but Robyn cared about all of us. “They didn't do anything! Stop being a controlling bitch and leave the man alone!”

“You might make this worse, Rose. It might be about you.” He had a point, even if I Didn't like it. Archer loved her, and the last thing I wanted to do was cause a larger problem than I already had. As much as I wished he would break up with her, he loved her so much. At least from how he talked about her to me… that's the only knowledge I had, other than their arguments. They kept their relationship pretty private, even from Thorn and I. Something told me that this wasn't about the relationship though. Or at least I wasn't what started the problem. 

“Who are you talking to?! You don't even know what I'm talking about!” Crystal screamed, turning to Alana. Archer backed up, sitting against the left wall and sinking down to the floor. I started to walk across the room to him, but Crystal turned to me. “Stay back. He’s mine.” she had a low growl in her voice, a sound an animal would make to warn other predators to stay away from their prey. 

“Crystal, you need to calm down.” Alana was trying too hard to stay calm, I could see it all over her face. I knew Alana well, it was very difficult for her to control her anger. She was working on that, and she had been for a long time. 

“No! I'm not calming down! I'm sick of it!” 

“Good, we're all sick of this. This is ridiculous.” 

“What are you going to do? You can't touch me and you know it!” 

“Don't test her Crystal.” Robyn spoke cautiously, slowly making his way to me. I was now the one frozen. I didn't know what to do. Archer looked like a wreck, he was about to break down crying. I saw the tears in his eyes. I wanted to help him but I couldn't help him from here. If I wanted to get up closer to him I would risk angering Crystal more, but if I stayed here I felt like I was abandoning Archer. Crystal's hands were balled up into fists, her muscles tense. The shirt she was wearing didn't have sleeves, and I could see how tense she was. 

“I'm not scared of her!” She had venom in her words, mixed with rage and confusion. Even for Crystal, this isn't normal. She wasn't acting herself. “Archer is with me! He should be listening to me!” Maybe this was just her, maybe this was her I never got to know. I never saw her away from Archer’s side. If this was what she really acted like… No wonder he started acting so much differently. 

“Please, calm down. You're not making the situation any better!'' Alana spoke fairly calmly, a comforting tone for anyone else in the situation. It gave me the impression that maybe she would be able to get this under control. That was all torn away though when Crystal threw a punch, hitting Alana square in the nose. She stumbled back a bit, her hands coming up to her face. She pulled her hands away a few seconds later, looking down to see blood on her fingertips. Crystal must have realized what she had done, because she suddenly looked terrified. Alana hit her back, a sickening crack silencing everything else in the room as Alanas first came into contact with Crystal's nose. Crystal barely moved, stepping back a few feet before she grabbed Alana by her hair and threw her to the ground. Alana pulled her down with her after grabbing her ankles. Alana hit her head on the stone floor, almost knocking her unconscious. Thorn and I made quick eye contact before rushing in to break it up. 

Usually we wouldn't have to break up a fight, then again usually we were sparring. Not fighting to hurt each other. Crystal and Alana could, and would kill each other if we didn’t try and stop them. 

Thorn grabbed Crystal by her shoulders, picking her up and holding her hands behind her back. Crystal fought back a lot, shoving Thorn off of her and trying to come after Alana and I. I had been on my knees trying to help Alana up, but she was dizzy and her wrist was definitely broken from the fall. I don't know how she handled it, but just based on how it was positioned I knew it was broken. Robyn grabbed Crystal by wrapping his arms around her, keeping her arms at her sides. She screamed and tried to bite him multiple times before Thorn was able to get a hold of her and keep her. I didn't stay much longer, getting Alana to her feet and helping her to her room. 

Alana’s room was filled with plants. A few plants were sitting on a table in front of her windowsill. I recognized most of them, like chamomile, catnip, lavender and rosemary. A small pot of wild violets sat on her nightstand, the flowers slightly wilted and the leaves yellowing. It smelled like a greenhouse, the smell of lavender and rosemary drowning most of the other smells out. Alana sat on her bed, holding her sleeve over her bleeding nose. The purple fabric was being soaked with the red liquid.

“I’ll grab you a rag; don't touch your wrist.” she laughed, looking down at her arm. 

“I can't even feel it yet.” Part of her wrist was red and swollen. By the crack I heard when she landed I expected to see it broken, but at the moment it looked like a sprain at most.

“That's an amazing sign.” sarcasm rang through my voice as I quickly walked down the hall back to the commons. There was a stack of folded white pieces of cloth that were always sitting on the counter. That's the only place I knew for sure there would be clean ones. 

Crystal was sunk on the ground in Thorn’s arms, sobbing. She looked so tired and weak. I almost said something but Thorn motioned for me to stay back. She was deeply upset, and it was deeper than just her relationship. Archer was nowhere to be found either. knowing him, he went to go take a walk around the garden for a bit, and Atlas followed.

“Is Alana alright?” Robyn asked quietly, following me as I grabbed two rags off of the neat stack in the back corner of the counter. 

“Her wrist is messed up, we should probably call a doctor. She won't be able to deal with that on her own.” I muttered, before starting to walk back to Alana's room. He followed. Our footsteps seemed ten times louder in the almost silent building, echoing through the stone hallway. “She might also have a concussion.”

“Calling a doctor for our doctor.” he let out an awkward laugh. “Sounds about right.” 

“It could have been worse.” I muttered, running my finger over the smooth fabric in my hands. “Is Crystal okay?” 

“No serious injuries, though I'm going to guess that her nose is broken. A few bruises… I don't think she's okay though. Physical injuries aside.”

“Oh I wonder.” I sighed, “I've never seen her cry.”

“Me either, and I've been here longer than you have.” This day took a turn for the worst so early. Robyn stopped as we approached the doorway. “I'm going to go get a doctor. Can you stay here for the time being?”

“Of course.'' In truth, I would have rather been out looking for Archer. I knew where he would have gone, and I knew how to comfort him. I couldn't just leave Alana alone though, especially with broken bones and a possible head injury. Alana could act like it, but she did not deal with pain well. 

“I’ll be back in a little bit. Make sure no one kills each other while I'm gone.” 

Chapter V

“I don't know!'' I laughed, turning around in my seat. “I was being stupid! As always!” Atlas laughed, falling backwards on my bed. Their shirt was in their hand next to them. I was able to see the scars across their chest and stomach. I knew some of the stories, but others I had no idea of. Every night we were stuck together on a patrol. We would tell the story of a scar, but Atlas had many more than me. There was one across their chest they said came from a training accident, a few on their shoulder from an animal attack, and a nice size scar from a burn on their stomach. It made their skin around their side and stomach seem much lighter than the rest of it, almost white. 

“You were like ten! Don't they teach you not to go by that river!?”

“Of course they do! I was just one of those kids that thought I was invincible!`` I turned back to my desk. Papers and notes spread across it, everything from the rubbings that Thorn gave me to messy scribbles by old friends. Sketches from Atlas and descriptions from Alana. My desk was a mess. I had pushed away the nightmares I had a few nights prior. They almost never got that bad, it was just a special night I suppose. 

“I understand some kids have no fear, but who tries to swim in the Sowilo river for a dare? It's all white water.”

“A dumb twelve year old.”

“Ah, so this only happened ten years ago!”

“I will throw you in the river.”

“You couldn't if you tried!” Alana and Crystal were shouting at each other in the commons, which had begun to happen more and more often. My door was closed, and we were all the way down the hall but we should still hear them. At this point no one was even going to try and stop them unless they started getting physical again. I would assume Archer and Thorn were both there making sure that didn't happen. Archer had barely left Crystal's side. I couldn't tell if that was because he was worried about Crystal getting hurt again, or if he was afraid she would hurt Alana. 

Archer and I grew up together in Maxten, and our lives weren't exactly perfect. I grew up with my Mother, Father, and older brother. My father was killed when I was child in a conflict involving Triastin soldiers and Maxten’s Guards. I remember staring at his dead body in the river, and that image was forever burned into my brain. I was only seven. My older brother was ten, and he started taking care of me from that point onward. My mother supported us, along with help from the community. Maxten was tight knit, that's how I met Archer. 

When I turned 13 I joined the guards, something my mother was very hesitant to let me do. At this point Echia had completely claimed Maxten, and Triastin had given up trying to take it. It wasn't worth the resources anymore. I met Archer there. We were around the same age, fighting together and causing some mayhem around the village. We became close fast, very fast. He stayed at my house a lot, despite that we didn't have much. His parents didn't pay attention to him, and my mother welcomed him as family. It was another mouth to feed, but it was also more company. 

Atlas and I stopped speaking the second we heard another voice enter the argument down the hall. Why was Thorn yelling? He wasn't always calm, but he rarely argued with people. He preferred educated debates, not screaming matches. Atlas and I made eye contact, both of our expressions dropping to curiosity more than anything else. Their eyes were a bluish silver, freckles speckling their face as if the gods had painted them on their cheeks. Their features were slightly covered by their hair, which was still pretty messy. 

“Do you wanna-” they cut me off pretty quick, rolling over to grab their shirt from the side of my bed and quickly slip it over their shoulders. 

“Yes please.” 

“Very eager to see some drama are we?”

“Hey, it's been a little too boring around here for the last few weeks.”

“Only because the two people that constantly start drama almost killed each other.” it might have been a little too soon to joke about it, it was a serious situation. Infighting could be the downfall of the Guardians, it had brought them down before. The very first set of Guardians under Serenity’s rule fell apart, it would be fitting if that happened to her daughter as well. I hoped we could keep each other together though. We were needed, especially now. Civil war or not, the entire country was struggling. Floods were becoming a problem as it began to rain often, and this budding revolution had caused major conflicts with Bristol and Tustin. Bristol supported the revolution, while Tustin believed it was a sad attempt to make history. 

We left my room and began our walk down the hall, taking our time as the shouting stopped being so destroyed by the echo. 

“We don't know who did that yet! It could have been a natural disaster, maybe even an accident!” Alana was clearly trying to deescalate the situation, but Thorn seemed pretty dead set on keeping it up. Crystal stood in the kitchen with her arms crossed, Archer standing next to her with an annoyed expression on his face. Crystal looked satisfied by what I could only guess she started, maybe to pay back. Archer looked like he was either ready to cry or punch a wall. 

“It was those bastards in Kai! They have basically taken the city!”

“First off, no they didn't. Felix stepped down willingly to allow them to move it because he believed in their cause. Second, one of the only leaders that have stepped forward claims to have grown up in Maxten. They wouldn't have done this!” Instead of being angry, Alana looked like she was trying to reason more than trying to argue. She had promised me to try and learn to control her temper, the situation with Crystal wasn't the first time something like that happened. The other times it was Alana who caused it, too. 

“They could easily lie about that, especially when so few people are left to confirm that claim! It could just be an alibi.”

“True, but that's why no one has picked a side yet! That's why we shouldn't be picking sides! Talia could also be blaming them to try and-” Crystal quickly cut her off. 

“We all know Talia wouldn't do anything like that. She's barely 18, I don't think she could even think of that. She doesn't have advisors either.” her voice was bland and dry, almost robotic. 

“It could still have happened, and we need to think of every outcome! We can't just base our beliefs on suspicion.” 

“There is more evidence against Kai. we need to do what's best for the country!”

“Talia is barely an adult, with no advisors, and no one to keep her in check! I'm not saying what they're doing in Kai is a good idea but we need to change something!”

“Talia is doing great-”

“If Talia was doing ‘great’ we wouldn't be doing this right now! It's obvious she's done something wrong!!” At first we all were silently saying to let them handle it themselves, but I could tell Alana was starting to get to her breaking point. Stepping in now was a horrible idea but I was going to do it anyway. 

“Both of you need to take a walk.” I stood between the two of them, keeping eye contact with Thorn. I don't know how he got so worked up over politics, especially when everything was so murky at the moment. “This is stupid. No one knows what's going on. We don't need another concussion.'' Everyone fell silent for a moment as Thorn stormed out the door, Crystal following him and Archer being pulled along. I turned and waved at me with an awkward smile on his face before he was tugged out the door. 

“Well that was something.” Atlas walked over to Alana and I. She laughed under her breath, shaking her hands as if to shake off her anger. 

“Tell me about it. That was stupid.” she said with a smile on her face. “Hey, I didnt hit him though!”

“Good job! You didn't get in another fight!” Atlas laughed, patting Alana lightly on the back. 

“Thank you, I try.'' Robyn came out of the hall, confused and worried. 

“What just happened?” he asked, running his hand through his hair as he sighed. 

“Thorn almost hit Alana.” Atlas said with a chuckle, tying their hair up with a small leather strap. 

“What? Why? I thought they got along.”

“Politics!” Alana put her hands up, almost like she was showing him an object. She laughed, but I could tell she was still a little shaken up. I silently wondered how much sleep she had gotten. Bags rested under her eyes, dark circles around them. Exhaustion was etched into every inch of her face. That was a normal thing to see with Robyn, he had trouble sleeping. Alana never had much of a problem with that though, I had never seen her like that again. 

“Oh what fun. Politics.” Robyn sighed, grumbling something under his breath. “Though I'm not sure if all of this is simply ‘politics’ anymore.  I heard enough to understand what you were arguing about.” he glanced over at me. I was fidgeting with my hands , picking at the skin around my fingers and rubbing over scars and scabs on my knuckles. I had hoped he wouldn't notice, but he knew me well enough to know I didn't like hearing so much about the disaster that killed my family, everyone I knew and destroyed my home. 

“You're right, but I'm calling it that anyway.” she let out a quiet sigh, so silent you could only see the movement of her chest. “Though ‘current events’ would be a better phrase for it.” 

“Someone should try and save Archer.” Atlas said, crossing their arms in front of their chest. 

“If you are expecting me to go steal Crystal’s boyfriend from under her after all that, you've got the wrong idea. I love him, but i'm not going to get myself killed today.'' I said. A playful smile spread across my lips, but I was faking. I honestly just wanted to go sit in my room for a little while, try and process what was said in the argument I had just heard. 

“You have a good point.” They pushed some stray hairs behind their ears. Their hair was still a little frizzy on top, but was overall pretty straight and well brushed. “I think I might be able to steal him without causing too much trouble.”

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