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zhuhongs · 3 years

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Ever since I watched Your Name Engraved Herein two weeks ago, I have wanted to talk about Jiahan as whole but in particular this scene right here that starts around the 40 minute mark.

CW’s: discussion of religion, internalized homophobia, violent homophobia, choking, and lack of consent. Generally, the same cws as in the movie.

Read more bc it’s uh.. 2.7k

all images are described in alt text

As soon as I watched this scene I just knew it had to be really significant and now rewatching YNEH, I realize that this is a major ideological turning point for Jiahan as a character. From this point on he slowly begins to accept that he’s gay and starts to consciously act on his feelings for Birdy. However, I must first add some context and insights on Jiahan’s prior behavior before I dive into this scene as a whole. At the beginning of the movie, we see that while Jiahan feels different from the rest of his roomates, he still sneaks out with them when they go hook up with girls, despite not showing any interest in the girl he’s with. He feels very different from the rest of his friends, but still goes along with them due to peer pressure. Later, he tries to dissuade them from violently hazing the gay student, Xie Zhenhong, (his name is never said in the film but it says so on his uniform shirt, and that what I’ll refer to him as for the rest of the post) but is reluctantly influenced to gang up on the student as well. He closes his eyes while he’s about to strike the bat down on the student, until Birdy rescues the student-- and Jiahan in a way-- from what is about to play out. After this, his friends accuse him of being in the same stall as Birdy (which he was) but he denies it, not wanting to explain why he was there and the ensuing taunting from his friends.

While its obvious that Jiahan has feelings for Birdy, he isn’t confident enough to pursue them outright. Birdy is the more confident one in both their friendship and in his sexuality, not caring about how anyone perceives him and does what he wants regardless of the consequences. Jiahan is the one worried about societal stigma and goes along with things he doesn’t want to do. However after this encounter with the gay underclassman pictured above, Jiahan become more brave and honest about his feelings towards Birdy. Interestingly enough in the scene directly after this, Birdy begins to conceal his true feelings for Jiahan and pursue a straight relationship with Banban. He doesn’t do this hurt Jiahan, as he does reciprocate Jiahan’s feelings, but to discourage him from coming out and becoming a social pariah for being gay. Birdy himself doesn’t mind being an outcast, but he does not want to see the same thing happen to the one he loves. So instead of letting Jiahan do that, he tries to discourage Jiahan from ever pursuing him by getting a girlfriend and suggest Jiahan does the same. In the same day, both Jiahan and Birdy come to opposite realizations about their feelings for the other, thereby changing their dynamic for the course of the movie. Someone else has picked apart Birdy’s scene in their own post. If you haven’t read that analysis, please go read it, because its really good at explaining Birdy’s character since most of his story isn’t directly revealed to us. We must read inbetween the lines and piece it together, which can be confusing on a first watch.

Anyways, now we can focus on Jiahan. At this point in the movie, Jiahan is trying to understand why he’s upset that Birdy is showing interest in a girl in their band while dealing with his own internalized homophobia and denial over his sexuality. He then turns to the only out gay person he knows -- Xie Zhenhong, who he sees in the cafeteria with new bruises on his face. He looks at Jiahan with a smile. This makes me feel like Zhenhong probably picked up on Jiahan and Birdy’s feelings for each other since last year, when he saw them exit the same stall in the bathroom. Having been the Distinguished Out Person in a group before, I can definitely relate to the way Zhenhong reacts to Jiahan. It the typical “oh honey, you don’t realize it yet, but I know you’re gay” reaction.

Jiahan waits outside the cafeteria and calls out to out him from behind. At first Zhenhong ignores him as we can see that he smirks a bit when he first speaks. He definitely heard Jiahan but doesn’t answer him until he repeats himself a few times. Zhenhong purposely stops when the two are in front of the stained glass window, away from others. Jiahan’s word choice towards Zhenhong is also interesting as he addresses him as “學弟” which is a term for an underclassman. To my understanding, it’s not overly formal nor is it overly familiar, however it is the nicest way that anyone has addressed him all movie. Jiahan than asks him who gave him those bruises, showing concern for his well being. He then reveals why he stopped Zhenhong saying “Actually I want to ask you, when did you start liking boys?” This really seals the deal to Zhenhong that Jiahan is talking to him to try and sort out his own feelings towards Birdy. While his suggestion that Zhenhong perhaps “see a doctor” or “consider getting a girlfriend” read as a microaggression to most viewers, Zhenhong himself can tell that Jiahan is asking him this in good faith. And perhaps, this might be the most understanding anyone has been towards him since Birdy helped him out prior. Before he responds, he looks up at Jiahan and fixes his bangs. This all stumps Jiahan whose eyes dart around, speechless. Zhenhong then circles his arms around Jiahan’s neck, a very intimate gesture, and studies him for a moment. We cannot see Jiahan’s face at this moment but he does shuffle slightly, his body language nervous and confused, but not upset. After looking at him, Zhenhong then goes in closer, assumedly to kiss him. At this point, Jiahan physically stops him and grabs him by the throat. However, Jiahan’s face doesn’t seem to be angry, if anything, his face looks more scared and confused-- akin to a ‘what are you doing?’ moment.

Initially Zhenhong’s choice to kiss Jiahan read very...strangely to me. Why would the screenwriter, as a gay man that grew up in the 80’s, choose to include this? What was there to gain? To me it seemed like it was reinforcing the stereotype of gay men being overly flirtacious and viewed as predators. Why show a nonconsentual attempted kiss at all? I thought about it a lot, both for this scene and the following one with the old man and later between Jiahan and Birdy because it seemed?? Odd to me?? Isn’t that a disservice in representing gay men? I don’t fully have the right answer but I feel like by writing the scene like this, it goes to demonstrate how Jiahan still isn’t fully comfortable with being gay. And also that lgbt people, especially teens, aren’t always going to be good rep. Liu Kuang-hui wasn’t writing the movie to be an perfect, morally uplifting, santized gay narritive. He was writing something that spoke to his real life experience as a gay man in 1980’s Taiwan. In real life, people do questionable things and good narratives are supposed to make you question characters and their actions and judge for yourself whether what they did was right or wrong. The narrative isn’t looking to condemn Xie Zhenhong for doing this. Xie Zhenhong is ultimately a victim of violent homophobia, that will not hide himself or his sexuality despite the violence he faces. He isn’t perfect, nor is Jiahan, nor is Birdy, nor is anyone in the film.

Although now having rewatched this scene upwards of eight times in writing this, it feels like Zhenhong didn’t assume this action to be without consent. Of course, no words were explicitly exchanged about kissing, and I’m not trying to make the case that it’s okay to kiss someone without their consent, that’s harassment. However, Zhenhong did gave Jiahan time to express his discomfort before proceeding. Zhenhong first got close to Jiahan by brushing his bangs, Jiahan did not say anything or look visibly uncomfortable. He then put his arms around Jiahan’s neck, and stared at him for a good ten seconds. At this point, Jiahan had time to say he was uncomfortable. As we know it, consent does indeed entail a verbal, understood yes from both parties. However given the context, I can understand why Zhenhong thought that Jiahan was consenting at that moment. However the moment Jiahan revoked his consent Zhenhong stopped trying to kiss him. Zhenhong shouldn’t have gone in without getting verbal consent, and Jiahan could’ve done something other than grabbing him by the throat. They were both in the wrong. Violence shouldn’t have been the reaction, nor should’ve kissing someone without their verbal consent. The lines were very blurred, and proper communication could’ve resulted in a better interaction but like I mentioned above, I don’t think the writers wanted to portray the scene in that way. The intent was not to say that Zhenhong’s actions were romantic or something to emulate. It was very purposeful in showing to interplay of homophobia, gay desire, and religion.

The scene is set up like a religious confession. Zhenhong purposefully leads Jiahan to the stained glass, a metaphor for his religious guilt. He doesn’t look Zhenhong in the eyes, his voice is hushed, and body language nervous, and troubled-- it communicates to Zhenhong that he thinks he may be gay and wants either reassurance that he isn’t or acceptance that is. Regardless, it’s a very vulnerable and intimate moment. Jiahan is facing him like ‘hey, I know my friends were bullying you and I wanted to save you but was too much of a coward and almost took part in harming you. I’m sorry. I know you saw that me and Birdy were in the same stall together, and that you saw me just telling him not to talk to the girls, and neither of those are heterosexual things to do. Please, help me.’ He’s asking Zhenhong to pass judgement on him, is he gay or not? By virtue of even asking that question, they both know the answer -- Jiahan is in love with Birdy, but whether Jiahan can accept that or not is up to him. In a way, Zhenhong is testing Jiahan to see how honest he can be with himself. By approaching him like that, he’s testing to see whether Jiahan can accept being intimate with a man or not. It’s not a good or ethical test, but it sure is effective. Because in his head, Jiahan is coming to realize that he doesn’t mind a man being close to him in a romantic way. Although, he isn’t fully there yet. He still grabs Zhenhong. But as Zhenhong stares at him despite the hand around his throat, Jiahan really has to think about his actions. Is that what he really wants to do, or is that what he’s been taught to do? It illustrates his internalized homophobia perfectly. Jiahan is literally staring gay desire in the face, rejecting it, while in front of his religion. Zhenhong finally answers Jiahan that “he has always loved boys since he was little, it’s never changed.” Upon hearing that his grip loosens and he pulls away. And the fact that we can hear him well means that Jiahan was never choking him, his hand was there, but not gripping. Zhenhong pulls him in closer and tilts his head, and says “and it never will.” Zhenhong’s words are very deliberate. It’s as if he anticipated this might happen and knew exactly what to say. He wants to carve it in Jiahan’s brain that no one chooses to be gay. They always are and no amount of denial, like the kind Jiahan is showing, will change that. He then finally lets go of Jiahan, who is speechless, he thanks him, and leaves. Jiahan, however, stays there for a second, processing everything that has happened, and breathes heavily before the scene cuts to later that day.

Finally, I would like to examine exactly what Zhenhong’s “thanks” even means. Why would Zhenhong be thanking Jiahan? On the surface, it lookslike Jiahan waited for this guy to finish eating, then asked him invasive questions about his sexuality and suggest he should get help and then almost choked him. This should count as a microagression at best and an attempted hate crime at worst. But, as I just dived into, this wasn’t a bad faith jeer by Jiahan in order to bully Zhenhong, this was a genuine cry for help made by a deeply confused teenager. I feel like the “thanks.” at the end of the scene was perhaps just as puzzling to me as when I thought about why the staff would have that scene play out like that in the first place? I think his thanks is conveying many things. Firstly, thanking him for not actually hurting him and allowing him to have a semi normal interaction with a student of the same gender. As far as we know, many, MANY different students have tried to hurt him in the new semester alone. Hell, we literally do not even know his name as everyone refers to him by the q slur or some other derogatory term, which speaks a lot to how he is treated. He also may be saying thanks for actually asking him about his sexuality. While Jiahan still followed it up with a suggestion he see a doctor, he still genuinely wanted to know why rather fully assume he has something wrong with him. Also, I feel like he might be thanking Jiahan for being brave enough to actually confront his sexualtiy and ask Zhenhong for help in the first place. Zhenhong really seems to be alone as the only gay student at the school but now knowing that Jiahan is realizing thathe’s gay as well, might make him be hopeful that things may slowly begin to change. Sadly, this interaction is the last time we see Xie Zhenhong all film which sucks because I really liked him. And I feel like it would’ve been really nice to see him after the time skip or at least have Jiahan mention him because this moment was one of the things that really made Jiahan start to accept his sexuality. A cut scene with Father Oliver also contributed, but I really wish Xie Zhenhong got more narrative than being the only out student that was then violently bullied. But, I acknowledge that MANY scenes were cut from the film for length so I can’t complain to much.

Oh god, that was a lot to say about a scene that was literally a minute and thirty seconds long. In conclusion!! I just had a lot of things to say about this scene and the scenes surrounding it. I think Jiahan is just a very painfully relatable character for many LGBT viewers and he was incredibly relatable for me which is why I felt the need to spend my day off writing this as opposed to doing homework. This scene is incredibly rich on many levels and I really appreciate YNEH as a whole for not spoonfeeding the viewer information and letting us interpret and question the scenes on our own and come to our own conclusions about the characters and yea. There’s so much going on and a lot of nuance and idk how to properly convey a lot of my thoughts but I tried really hard bc i really do love this movie. I really was puzzled by this scene at first, but now having examined it, it is my favorite scene in the movie. If this scene was changed in any way to make it more palatable, it would’ve been nearly as impactful which was a hard decision to come to, but I stand by it. I don’t know if I feel the same about other scenes but I will be reviewing YNEH as a whole in a different post. I have much more to say but my thoughts on this scene were far too long to not make it a separate post of its own. In essence, YNEH is about growing up and accepting yourself in all ways. Not all of those things are pleasant but if you cannot accept those things about yourself, you’re doomed to be miserable until you can live life unburdened by your own and societies limitations. Goodnight, my fingers hurt.

#i think im like . the only one thats ever refered to that student by name on tumblr dot com.. that ive seen #your name engraved herein #刻在你心底的名字 #chang jiahan #long post #🐌.pdf #also i rewrote and reworded this sooo many times to get it to sound the way i want fjvjdjdjs bc this movie has so much to talk abt and word #it right bc like yea.. yk... bc like... yea #its 1am... gn

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soukokuwu · 4 years

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Hi there, I really love your writing. Can you write a scenario where Dazai's black fem s/o who works at the ada and is encountered with a racist client who makes it pretty obvious that she doesn't want the s/o there because of her skin colour and s/o is feeling pretty down at it. Something similar recently happened to me so I kinda just wanna read some damn scenario about it, thanks.

HOME IS NOT A PLACE. genre; pairing. fluff; dazai x reader word count. 1,675 synopsis. dazai comforts you after an unnecessary hardship. warning. brief discrimination author notes. i’m so sorry to hear that happened to you (& i know i took very long with this, i apologise.) i’ve had similar discrimination inflicted upon me too so i hope you don’t have to experience it again & that you’re feeling better by now. <3

The nerves of some people.

A pair of chocolate beads observe silently, intensively, as the callous words spill out of thin, dry lips.

“I don’t want someone like her to serve me.”

Sip.

The old woman eyes you top to bottom.

“I demand someone else, someone... normal, at least.”

He catches the disdain in her voice. He’s sharp as a tack. Beside him the weretiger watches, cowering as he feels the ominous energy emanating from his superior. He’s seen Dazai angry, furious, but never like this. Never... silent. In this moment, the brunette is absolutely livid.

Dazai’s hands are placed on the table, balled tightly into fists. His eyes are trained on the client you’re trying to appease — she’s too wrapped up in her own head to notice him glaring. As he expects. People like that are often ignorant.

Normally he’d hate to get caught up in things like this, prefers to leave it to Kunikida, but the blonde isn’t around and it’s you she’s speaking to. He’s not going to keep mum when it comes to you. How dare someone insult his girlfriend for something that shouldn’t even matter?

Dazai loves you, he knows you’re way too nice to stand up for yourself, and Naomi is already killing herself trying to appease this witch. He notices the way your nervous fingers are fumbling with each other, the way you press your lips together to stop them from trembling, even the way your feet are tucked under the table brushing against each other. You’re scared, and your head is hung so low... you’re ashamed?

The line has been drawn a while ago. But now he absolutely can’t stay still. Not when it’s leaving you feeling so horrified.

He stands up, forcefully kicking the chair back against the wall with his knees as he does, and everyone in the room goes quiet.

All eyes are on him. His bangs are messy, covering his eyes, and lucky they are, because whatever expression lay under there it isn’t for everyone to see. Even the usually chirpy Kenji is stunned into silence, a wave of fear flashing across his features.

“Oh? Has the whiny granny finally shut up?” Dazai hums.

He’s fully aware that everyone in the room feels even more uncomfortable than before. As they should be; he doesn’t use this tone much, if at all, around them. It’s a tone most associated with who he used to be, a tone that incites a flashback to his port mafia days.

But in the midst of everything, you snap out of your seat and scurry off, your head in your hands. And Dazai watches as you run out of the office. Should he deal with the lady first? Or should he get to you? He doesn’t much know the ‘right’ ways of a relationship, but a nudge comes in from Naomi.

“Don’t worry, we’ll take care of this,” Naomi assures him, a newly invigorated motivation after seeing his strong reaction.

Dazai mumbles a “thanks” before he excuses himself to find you — shooting one last warning glare at the old lady — and he knows just where you are.

Something cold is pressed against your cheek and you jolt. Dazai pulls it away with a chuckle and waves the cold can of juice in your face.

His features are much softer now than it was before, and you ease up a little when you realise he must be so worrried to have come up here to find you. When you take the can from him, he settles down quietly beside you and looks out at the view, and you two sit there wordlessly.

You are on the rooftop of the building right beside the ADA office. This is your hideout, a safe, convenient space for when you really need an escape from anything. And today is one of those days. Rare as they may be, you expect some people to react that way. Because sometimes humanity is flawed in the worst ways possible.

In an ideal world you wouldn’t be feeling this way. In an ideal world, everyone here would be able to accept you for who you are — not what you look like, not where you’re from. In an ideal world, you’d be free from the judgemental, free of the discrimination.

But this isn’t an ideal world. This is earth. This is life. What can you do but accept it? What else can you do other than tolerate what’s thrown at you? You think back to the harsh words spewed by the woman before — the one targeted at you because of your skin tone.

A rush of memories flood your mind.

Unwelcome looks from classmates. Sneers wherever you went in school. The way your name was associated with the sentences “why is she here?” and “she looks weird”. It was like sentencing you to be a social outcast over something you couldn’t control. You’d been forced to spend most of your schooling days alone, project groups being the bane of your existence. Where you thought it’d be an opportunity to make friends, it just gave the other kids additional chances at mocking you. The worst part was you couldn’t even talk to anyone about it. You had your doubts talking to school counsellors, they could easily be one of them. You didn’t even dream of telling your mother either, being a single mom was hard enough, you didn’t want to pile on more problems.

But it lightened up as you got older and people got more mature. Didn’t mean it stopped completely, though. You still had to welcome several unwanted glares and finger-pointing. But at least the name-calling stopped. And what you didn’t hear wouldn’t hurt you. It got better when you finally stepped out into the adult world. People were generally more accepting now, and you didn’t once feel left out in the ADA. They were all kind, for the most part, and never once did they discriminate against you. All they cared about was your work ethic, and they all generally accepted you for who you are. They didn’t give a damn what you looked like.

They accepted you for you, and that was the greatest gift they could have bestowed upon you. To the others it may have been nothing, but to you it meant everything.

There had never been a day where you were forced to confront your old fears. Until today. When that lady ever so subtly insulted you. It was like every doubt that ever crossed your mind since you were a kid came flooding back to you, the questions of whether you really belonged here, whether you should just give up and move away. But where? This is your home, for as long as you can remember.

“I love your eyes.”

Dazai’s sudden declaration stuns you, and you tilt your head towards him with a curious gaze. He isn’t teasing you, you knew that much. If he was, he would wear that wide, silly grin of his. No, this time his smile is… endearing, comforting.

“I love the way your smile reaches your eyes.”

A pair of hands reach out to cup your cheeks, and you can feel yourself getting nervous. He usually never speaks his feelings. Why is he doing this now?

“Look at me, belladonna,” he coaxes, and you listen. You’re met with earnest chocolate eyes, and you keep looking into them, even as they inch closer and closer towards you. He stops the moment the tip of his nose touches yours, and you feel your breath hitch at your throat.

“You are a beautiful person, my love,” he assures you, voice low and steady. His eyes are still staring straight into yours, and you can just make out his beautiful hair flowing in the breeze. “I’ve thought that ever since the first time I laid eyes on you.”

You chuckle, remembering the first day you stepped foot in the ADA office. Dazai had stumbled over all googly-eyed and took your hand, already confessing his future love with you. And he was right, because look at you now. And all the sounds muffle together as you continue gazing at your boyfriend as he lists down all the things he loves about you. From things as small as how your hands feel in his to the way he absolutely loves how he can be completely himself (or as much as he can be) around you.

“Shut up.”

Without even thinking, you find yourself tilting heavenward, pressing your lips onto his. It’s something he welcomes, by the way, his hands moving from your cheek to your neck and kissing you deeper.

You know exactly what he means by saying all of that. And you find it cute, how his way of comforting you is quite a roundabout, yet why does it still work? But you find the answer when you pull away, that first moment when you open your eyes — really open your eyes — and meet his. He’s right.

That lady’s opinion didn’t matter. It hurts, you know he’s not invalidating it, but he just knows talking about it further would just frustrate you more. Besides, he’s been with you long enough to know; if you want to, you would talk about it, and he would listen. As he always does. Even when it’s about things you considered trivial or stupid, he always gives you the time of day, always tries to make everything better.

He’s right — she doesn’t matter. To you, the one that matters most, is him. And you’re grinning silly just thinking of just how much he loves you, and how easily he makes you feel better with just his words. The lady and her biting remarks are well behind you now, as he envelops you in his arms, giving you an important confirmation: Dazai would always have your back, would always protect you.

Because you can have a myriad of doubts, but one thing is for sure.

Dazai is your home.

tags. @yokelish @gogolparadise @fyowyn-writes @smoochi-dazai @animatedarchives

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dragetunge · 3 years

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HICCUP AND ASD

Underdeveloped Social Skills: Despite being the outcast of the village it is often hard for Hiccup to keep social conversations with people. He still is unsure of how to bond with people despite the wars ending and adjusting. The few people he can hold conversations with are in this order. Gothi, Gobber and Fishlegs and Toothless. Outside of those few people he cannot find an appropriate way to socialize with them.

Difficulty with Nonverbal Behavior: Hiccup doesn’t keep eye contact with people. Looking them directly into their eyes is just something he can’t do. There are a few he can because of how well they accommodate him but in most conversations Hiccup looks anywhere and everywhere but people in the eye. He’s more comfortable looking dragons in the eye than people.

Trouble Expressing Emotions: Hiccup’s real emotions are always masked. He has no issue speaking with hands about how he should be feeling but whatever he’s really feeling he puts up a façade to the entire world. One of the few people who know how he is actually feeling are very few an limited. Those close to him such as Toothless often reflect Hiccup’s true feelings.

Lack of Coordination: Even before the events leading up to the loss of his left leg he’s been overly clumsy. Falling over his own feet to strikes of his hammer missing completely and hitting his hand. Becoming disabled these things only become worse. Unbalanced and more uncoordinated he struggles for months to find a balance.

Routines: Hiccup is very stuck in a set of routine. From the time to he wakes up in the mornings to the time he lays his head to sleep. Everything happen at an exact time at a particular place. Disruption in this causes him distress. When a routine has been disrupted it will become very apparent in Hiccup’s features.

Limited Range of Interests: This is a big one for Hiccup. Anything outside of smithing, tinkering, exploring and dragons this boy has no interest in it. Dragons are one of the few beings who first accepted Hiccup in who he was. Toothless reflects his more carefree self the part of him that wants to explore and seek new things. Its nothing insulting if he doesn’t engage with you. Please don’t take it personally.

Behavior: During early childhood erratic behavior was something Hiccup was known for. Seeing Stoick mostly ignored him insisting it was because he was acting out it wasn’t the case. Things at a younger age irritated Hiccup to a point his behavior would worsen and he would try communicate that to his father who played it off as an over reaction. Gobber would be one of the few to see something was upsetting Hiccup when Stoick wouldn’t. Into adulthood this only worsens. With more stress and strain Hiccup has been known to snap more often. Not because he wants to but because after it helps release the tension building he didn’t know was even building prior to it.

Self-Absorption: From time to time others have pointed out Hiccup acting self-absorbed. That he thinks about no one or anything else outside of dragons and that is absolutely not true. There are times in conversation where is prone to “zoning out” especially if that conversation is not entirely inclusive or keeping him in the loop. He tends to think about anything and everything else but what is being in said of front of him. An issue that comes up a lot when he becomes Chief and doesn’t exactly hear what someone is telling him or asking him for advice on how to handle certain situations.

Communication: When it comes to communication Hiccup is known for his sharp tongue. Its just because he doesn’t think with holding the truth is beneficial to anyone. This often comes off as him being cold-hearted or non-caring.

Creative Ability: This just speaks for itself. See what Hiccup has created. This boy will not stop nor will he be stopped. His creations are unlimited.

Tics: Prior to losing his leg, Hiccup has other form of tics that some people have picked up on. Often seen tapping his foot in a repetitive or fast motion. This comes out in times of frustration. In times of unease Hiccup taps his middle finger on the bone on his wrist on his left arm. Hiccup doesn’t harm himself but he does gnaw on his fingers if they’re near his mouth.

Stims: These are big. In times of great joy there is a small noise Hiccup makes that people don’t think comes from him. It is him its a small squeak / squeal. Long periods of rest or sitting on village councils Hiccup can be see rocking to keep himself entertained. Hand clapping can be heard but not in the same way you think. He uses his main fingers and closes them against his palm with his thumbs to make a clapping noise without both his hands meeting. After becoming physically disabled another stim Hiccup adopts is squeaking his prosthetic on purpose. He likes the noise it makes and it brings him joy.

Relationships: When it comes to meeting new people there is little to no interest. When it comes to those close to him its often hard for Hiccup to express feelings to those he becomes infatuated with. Relationships seem overly hard for him but with persistence it’ll become easier for him to be himself and show himself as he is truly around those he is comfortable with.

#dragetunge #🔥▓◤ALWAYS A TRAINER: Headcanon◥#🔥▓◤A PEACEKEEPER I REMAIN: Musing◥#my headcanon #listen half of the stuff hiccup does is what i do #so #tw; long post #if it needs more tags please lemme know

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dutchdread · 3 years

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What is Love? Baby don't hurt me.

This article sets out to define different types of love in a meaningful way, and argue why the specifics surrounding Aerith and Cloud makes it so that the commonly accepted romantic version of the emotion can't apply. __________________________________________________

Whenever you talk to anyone, it's important to be on the same page, and one of the most important parts about that is making sure that you're speaking the same language. I am sure we've all had moments where we were arguing with someone only to discover that you both believed the exact same thing, but that you simply used a different word to describe said thing.

"That's what I've been saying" "No, that's what I've been saying!" "Well what are we even arguing about then?!"

When that happens, you're not arguing about the topic itself, you're arguing about semantics, about language.

An argument about whether or not what Cloud, Tifa, and Aerith felt for each other would fall under "love" is a debate about language, not FFVII, and I am not here to have a conversation about language. Unfortunately, before I can actually have a conversation about FFVII, a conversation about language is apparently needed.

Love is an incredibly broad term, used to express what we feel about our family, our pets, our friends, our "lovers", and even our favorite songs, weather, and food. So why the hell do we ask "who did Cloud love" as if love is some singular binary system?

I can never prove that what a character feels isn't love, I can only assert that I personally wouldn't use the word "love" to describe said feeling, and explain why I wouldn't. When we ask "does Cloud love Tifa or Aerith", we are presupposing a concept of "love", and asking who it applies to.

"I pity you, you just don't get it at all, there is nothing I don't cherish"

But it applies to both, and it applies to Barret, and Marlene, and Denzel, and everyone. Because love is far too broad a term to start with, it's a catch-all. Instead of starting with a preconception of what love is, and seeing who has it, we should describe what people actually have, and see what their individuals shapes of love look like.

Even so, I will do my best to describe what I mean by romantic love, as opposed to a crush, or infatuation, or attraction, so that when I say "Cloud and Aerith don't (and can't) romantically love each other", that it's clear what that assertion means to me.

I'm going to tell you a story, a story that, admittedly, doesn't make me look good, but which will hopefully provide context for what I think love is and why.

When I was younger I wasn't the most popular kid, back then I assumed I was unattractive, as an adult I realize its because I was socially awkward as fuck (I was actually cute as heck if I do say so myself). However, by the time I got to highschool I had made a best friend and had managed to figure out and fake social conventions enough that I could at the very least solve my issues through humor instead of violence. The change from typical village kids to a wider pool of potential friends also enabled me to finally find people who were more like me. Even so, the whole social outcast part was still ingrained deeply enough in me that I was mostly putting on an act in front of people, saying whatever I needed to say in order to get a certain reaction, in order to be liked, rather than just being myself. I had had crushes before, when you're alone it's easy to really fall for someone, and hell, I was always a sucker when it came to love stories, but my childhood had basically left me too nervous that I'd say the wrong thing to ever actually say the right thing when I really liked a girl. However, generally being the life of the party left me with a string of girlfriends I didn't care too much about. Even so, I eventually met a girl that I was instantly smitten with, the most attractive girl I knew and somehow I managed to start dating her, and hell, I even thought I loved her. I dated said girl for several years, but without going into spoilers I'll just say that I left that relationship pretty jaded and and disillusioned with the concept of love. I felt like I had done everything I could and love in general was bullshit and was honestly pretty done with women in general. Ironically my new pessimistic attitude made me much more successful with women than I had ever been before, by that time I was known as someone who was fun to party with, and unlike the majority of people my age I was in incredible shape and still had all my hair. However, while I enjoyed my newfound popularity there was a part of me that really resented it because I realized that what women seemed to react positively to wasn't what I imagined love to be like and I hated that. I hated that when I used to be kind and filled with notions of "true love" no one was interested, but now that I was disinterested and clearly manipulative women seemed to throw themselves at me. During that time I basically stopped looking for a meaningful relationship and just decided to have fun until my life would, inevitably, fall apart.

Eventually though I got a girlfriend who I didn't deserve and was much too good for me. However, when I did I was no longer interested in building a relationship and I was pretty certain that it would eventually fall apart anyway like everything else. As a result I mainly cared about what I could get from her, I didn't act like a proper partner and I when I thought about "fixing the relationship" I was thinking mostly about what she could do to be a better girlfriend, honestly, part of me actually resented her for not being my ex. When talking about our issues the general terms were "I'll do this, but only if you fix that". Without going into details, the general gist is that we had a horrible start to our relationship and that affected everything that came after it.

Eventually though this girl who I once mainly saw as just another temporary part of my life became something more to me, she became a more complete person. I mellowed out, and started appreciating her more, I decided to get us to work on the relationship but the damage was basically already done. She'd given up on me ever wanting to settle down and had started distancing herself from me emotionally and eventually I became sick of fighting for the relationship by myself and we broke up. Afterwards, free of pressure, I sat back and l evaluated what I wanted in life, I thought about myself, and her, REALLY thought about her. The good parts, and the bad. And I realized that all the things I was annoyed about were honestly absurd. I decided I was going to fight for her, not just "try to fix the relationship" by figuring out what worked and what didn't, but I just decided I was going to properly appreciate her, be the best boyfriend I could be, and not ask for anything in return. And let me tell you, that change in mindset changed EVERYTHING for me. Within months I became absolutely smitten with her, when I first started the relationship I was honestly annoyed if we met up and didn't have sex, now just sitting on the couch under a blanket with her became the highlight of days, even the things I once saw as negatives became a precious part of the puzzle that made her her. My biggest regret in life is still that I couldn't be the person she made me back when I first met her. (and concerning looks, she is honestly so much more gorgeous than the ex it's not even funny, how did I not see that?). The point of all this is that love isn't automatic, it's not something that happens without your consent, it's the result of actions, of decisions. When you choose to take the time to look at your significant other, and soak up and appreciate who they are and what they do, when you put in the effort, that's when love grows. I've gone from being sick and tired of someone I had been with for years, to being absolutely infatuated with them, simply by making a decision. I could not have made that decision had I not been myself, that decision would have been false. Looking back, all those earlier girls I've been infatuated with, that wasn't love, I didn't even know who they were, I barely knew who I was. No matter how much passion I felt in the moment, no matter how much fun I had in the times we spent together, now I don't even remember their names.

Love isn't your heart beating faster, it's not that instinctive nervousness that comes with talking to a cute girl you just met. It's a complete and deep appreciation of a person, un understanding of who you are, who they are, and what that means to you. Love is what I feel for my brother, who is as much a part of me as my own arm, without whom I would not be me. Someone who isn't just another person in your life, but is a part of what you consider to be your life, without them your life could not be the same, because they're an absolutely crucial part of it. That doesn't happen in a week, because you can't really learn who someone is in a week, even if you could see all of it, you couldn't internalize it. You can always imagine living without them, because you were, just last week. There are people who meet their soulmates sure, and say they knew within a week, but had they never seen that soulmate again, they would not still be pretending they were "the one" years later, and if they were, their friends wouldn't be saying "that's love", they'd be saying "that's an unhealthy obsession". Cloud and Aerith barely knew each other, both when it comes to time, as well as to how much they actually knew about each other. Cloud had no idea of who he was or what was important to him in life, he was unable to be honest with others or even himself, so how would he ever be able to meaningfully make an informed decision to make the kind of emotional commitment that's the cornerstone of love? He didn't know himself, nor did he know Aerith, to whose feelings he was canonically oblivious and whose entire life was a mystery to Cloud. How can we say that Soldier Cloud is capable of knowing who he loves when he's not even aware of the the gigantic Tifa shaped area of his identity. Can Soldier Cloud determine what he values and why without the knowledge of what he's gone through in his life? Sure, but can Soldier Cloud make that determination for the real one? No. Soldier Cloud, and his emotions, have no relation to that of the real Cloud. The real Cloud must determine what people mean to him all by himself. And when it comes to real Cloud, it is pretty obvious who is the biggest part of his life, the person who defined it from the time he fell for her as kid, right through when he became a soldier to impress her, and up to and past the moment he started raising children with her. For Cloud it's pretty obvious who he has the deep personal understanding with, the girl who filled his sub-conscious, and was literally in his head with him, the girl who is stated to understand him best, and who has a shared story with him, having experienced both the good, and the bad, alongside him. Who was there with him when he was a child, who was there with him in Nibleheim, who found him when he lost his identity and gave him a new one, who was with him when Aerith died, who was with him when he broke, who was with him when he was catatonic, who was with him and helped him find himself again, who was with him during the last night underneath the highwind, who was with him at the end in the north cave, who he started living with afterwards, who waited patiently while he went to find himself, and welcomed him back with a smile. I am sure Cloud liked Aerith....but he LOVES Tifa.

#Cloti #shipping #Love #Tifa #Cloud

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broadwaycutie16 · 4 years

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Earlier today, I watched a video by TheTake on YouTube, exploring and deconstructing the “Nice Guy” trope in popular media.

Basically, the trope explained the Nice Guy trope and how toxic it really is, devaluing the girl’s feelings in a relationship and promoting male entitlement. Now, I’ve heard many people in this fandom complain that Adrien Agreste is the embodiment of this trope. The underdog sweet boy, pining after a girl who has rejected his feelings multiple times, persisting in his romantic advances towards her despite her making her disinterest clear.

While I must admit that Adrien does check many of the boxes for the standard Nice Guy, I quickly remembered who else in the show, besides him, checks out many of the same boxes, and perhaps a few more than him. Someone who exhibits many of the same behaviors of the Nice Guy, but whose less-than-healthy attitude of love is often overlooked and/or pardoned by most of the fandom, while they bash Adrien for similar behaviors.

Can you guess who it is?

It’s Marinette Dupain-Cheng.

I know what you’re thinking. How dare I accuse Marinette of such a toxic mindset! She’s the hero of our story! She fights off the bitches that are bad for Adrien and yet he doesn’t even give her the love she deserves! Adrien is the one who should consider himself lucky that she adores him! Hashtag Marinette Deserves Better!

But you see that right there? That, my friends, is what makes Marinette Dupain-Cheng, in my opinion, more of a Nice Guy than Adrien Agreste.

The whole purpose of the Nice Guy trope is to make us root for the underdog. Because who doesn’t love a good story where the loser that everyone expected to fail spectacularly ends up winning it all in magnificent fashion? Almost every movie has it’s underdog. With sports movies, it’s the unathletic wimp with a skinny, small, and/or weak body. In high school movies, it’s the outcast weird kid who’s been ostracized by the popular crowd for their unusual interests and/or attitude. In romantic comedies, the underdog is the hopelessly romantic Nice Guy who adores the girl and worships her like a goddess, as opposed to the cooler, more aloof, more sociotially successful man who takes her for granted. And since the cardinal rule of feel-good films is that underdog must end up getting what he’s been wanting throughout the whole movie, the movie then directs the story narrative to favor the Nice Guy’s desires, manipulating the audience to cheer him on and, in the process, blatantly dismiss all his unhealthy behaviors and obsessive traits, like stalking the object of his affections or trying to edge out any competition he has.

Sound familiar? That’s because that’s exactly what many Marinette stans who are also Adrien haters do.

I’m not saying Marinette is a bad person, but as far as Nice Guys go, she has shown us many red flags. She often stalks Adrien, trying to sneak into parties she has not been invited to just to see him, or following him to his house when he goes to study with one of her enemies. She often tries to keep away any girls she sees as competition for Adrien. With Chloé and Lila, it’s semi-justifies, because they can be total bitches. But not Kagami.

Is Kagami kind of cold? Yes. Can she be competitive? Absolutely. But she is not evil. Many Adrienette shippers often hate on Kagami, saying she is a stone cold bitch who will stop at nothing to “steal” Adrien away from Marinette. They misinterpret what she whispered in Marinette’s ear during Frozer. Kagami said, “The reason you cannot stand on your feet is your hesitation. I never hesistate.” Adrienette shippers translate this to, “He’s mine, bitch. Back off, or I’ll kill you.” But what she’s ACTUALLY saying is, “I know you like Adrien, but I like him, too, and I’m not gonna just back off out of curtesy while you fumble the ball. So if you want Adrien, you’re going to have to win him from me fair and square. That means you have to suck up whatever insecurities you have and really work to win him over.” She knows Marinette loves Adrien, but Kagami loves him, too. And she’s not just gonna wait around for Marinette to get over her nervousness and ask Adrien out of curtesy. She’s telling Marinette that if she wants Adrien, she needs to get herself together and go after him while he’s still available.

Kagami is not a bad person. She is simply lacking in social experience to properly express her emotions and desires without coming off as an ice queen. And yet, many Adrienette shippers view her through the same toxic lens as many fans of romantic comedies view love rivals of the Nice Guy. If the rival is even the tiniest bit self-serving or emotionally detached, they are automatically dismissed as bad people and therefore, less worthy of the main love interest than the Nice Guy. Thus, viewers are quick to pardon any attempts made by the Nice Guy to sabotage or undermine his rival as a necessary evil, something that must be done so that “true love” can prevail. Like say, I dunno, setting the rival up to be humiliated at a fancy party, despite all that they did to supposedly deserve such treatment was show up to said event, which they were invited to, and act friendly towards the main love interest, because they ARE friends?

If the scenario seems familiar, that’s because that’s exactly what Marinette tried to do to Kagami in Animeastro.

One thing I’ve noticed about this fandom, is that people seem to have a double standard when it comes to Marinette’s negative behaviors vs. Adrien’s. In Glaciator, Adrien seems to accept Ladybug’s rejection, claiming that her friendship was what mattered most, then takes back everything he said in Frozer, acting salty towards Ladybug for her earlier second rejection. After that, the whole fandom was on his case, calling him a jerk and a liar.

Am I happy Adrien went back on his word like that? Of course not. But in that same episode of Frozer, Marinette accepts that she may not be more than Adrien’s friend, and even helps him on his date with Kagami, despite her heartache and despite how everyone thought she was crazy for doing so. Super sweet, right? Except when Animeastro happens, she goes back on her mature acceptance and teams up with her worst enemy, all for the purpose of embarrassing the same girl who she supposedly accepted Adrien might like instead of her. Funnily enough, no one in the fandom seemed to give her any flack for that, despite the fact that it was an exhibitation of the same possessive, hypocrital and selfish behavior that Adrien displayed earlier on, which everyone hated on him for.

Many Marinette fans are projecting the same toxic, biased mindset onto her that fans of romantic comedies project onto the Nice Guy. They excuse any negative behaviors done by the protagonist, insisting that it’s for the greater good, all while hating on the love interest for not immediately falling into their arms. They prioritize the needs and feelings of the Nice Guy/Marinette while completely disregarding those of their love interests.

Marinette stans insist that she deserves Adrien’s love more than anyone else, bashing Adrien for overlooking her in favor of other girls. After all, Marinette has done so much for Adrien, while all Ladybug does is reject him in favor of some other guy, despite how he’s put his heart and life on the line for her. That means he should just cast aside his feelings for Ladybug and settle for Marinette, right? Well, by those standards, shouldn’t Ladybug do the same? After all, Chat Noir has risked his life for her several times and made it clear he adores her, while all Adrien has done is ignore her feelings in favor of other girls, even though she’s been right there the whole time. If Adrien should ignore some of Marinette’s stalker tendacies and easily-jealous nature, shouldn’t Ladybug be able to overlook some of Chat Noir’s less-than-acceptable behaviors?

Marinette fans often share the mindset of Nice Guy stans of romance as a moral issue, harboring the idea that goodness and unwavering affection should automatically earn romantic feelings. They believe that being nice to someone automatically means they owe it to you to love you back. Sadly, life isn’t that clear cut. Love is often given to someone, whether they deserve it or not. It’s both the best and worst part of it. This close-minded, morally black-and-white mindset is given to fans by the Nice Guy, as it’s his expectation that his being kind to the girl and showering her with romance should mean that she should know he is the one for her.

Sadly, this thinking by the Nice Guy is often hypocrital in the movies, because the same Nice Guy is attracted in his crush at least in part to some sort of superficiality (ex. she’s beautiful, popular, dresses well, is the Cool Girl who drinks beer and watches sports while looking hot in a tank top and short shorts). He says she’s superficial for not wanting a dork like him, but it’s not like he’s looking around for some socially-awkward, plain-faced girl on his own level or lower and falling for HER because of HER kind treatment of him and the intensity of HER feelings. Fans get upset when Adrien the teen heartthrob doesn’t give Marinette her due attention, but it’s not like they’re clamoring for her to settle for Nathanael in “Evillistrator” or Nino in “Animan”, even though they had intense feelings for her and were kind to her.

Because of the partial superficiality of the Nice Guy’s attraction to his crush, he has this fantasy built up in his head. He puts her up on this pedestal, much like the pedestal Marinette puts Adrien on. It gets to the point that he’s in love with the IDEA of her, this image of a perfect angel that he’s made her out to be, and not the real her. He refuses to admit that she is flawed, much like how Marinette overlooks Adrien’s doormat attitude and overwillingness to forgive, seeing him instead as the perfect boy who can do no wrong. This is a set up for disappointment later on, as when the love interest does not do what the Nice Guy expects from her, like instantly return his love, the illusion that he has so carefully crafted for his pleasure is shattered, and everything goes downhill.

Many people blame the love interests for not instantly favoring the Nice Guy once he’s shown his romantic dorky side, thinking they should pick up on the feelings right away, like it’s their job to know who they should be with immediately upon meeting them, that it’s their fault they miss the signs. But this misconception shifts blame away from the Nice Guy for not properly acting on his feelings. This is where the Nice Guy becomes his own worst enemy. He automatically convinces himself that he’s below the girl’s standards and gives up before he even tries. He hesitates to act on his feelings, much like Marinette is so certain that Adrien is out of her league that she lets her insecurities get the better of her and avoids confessing to Adrien or even talking to him because she’s sure she’ll mess up before she even tries. Then when the girl doesn’t immediately realize that she is loved, despite getting no clear signs or even the words “I love you”, she is blamed for leading the Guy on, much like how Adrien is blamed for not recognizing the mixed signals from Marinette as affection.

Even after Adrien has told her that he loves another girl, Marinette still decides to keep pursuing him, much like Chat Noir kept pursuing Ladybug even after she told him she loved someone. Yet, while Adrien is bashed for not immediately accepting her choice and working to move on, Marinette is pardoned from not accepting Adrien’s feelings in the matter. Viewers excusing all her Nice Guy traits while prosecuting Adrien for displaying all the same traits is what makes Marinette, in my opinion, more of a Nice Guy than him. Because the Nice Guy is usually the one that shippers root for, despite the warning signs of their behavior and the fact that the love interest has said flat out that they are not into them that way.

Do I think that Marinette is a bad person? No. Do I condone Adrien’s behavior over hers? Absolutely not. But these are fictional characters. We can’t control their flaws or talk some sense into them anymore than we can change the past or rewrite the movies that have sold us this one-sided mindset. I don’t hold their flaws against them and act like their imperfections define their whole character. I focus on the good they do, and if the characters forgive them, I forgive them, because they’re the ones who choose who to forgive, who to love, who to be friends with. So kiss off, Adrien salters. Y’all are a bunch of hypocrites. Peace out.

#adrien agreste #adrien x marinette #adrienette #marinette dupain cheng #miraculous ladybug #miraculous season 3 #miraculoustalesofladybugandcatnoir #miraculous salt #ml salt #adrien sugar #adrien deserves better #anti Adrien salt #Adrien stan #adrien protection squad #ml fandom salt #salters salt

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ruined-my-dramatic-entrance · 3 years

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Hat’s Off to You

Platonic fluff, a bit silly or OOC but not a crackfic lol, 1659 words TW: S!Janus

“What’s going on here?” Patton asked as he popped up.

After rolling his eyes and a moment of hesitation, Virgil replied, “Princey brought up some dumb idea about Janus having some weird secret hidden under his hat and now he and Logan are debating it.”

“Well, what’s all hat about?” the moral side inquired further with a grin.

Though Patton had expected Virgil to at least smirk at this, the latter instead protested, “Please, just get them to stop for now or something…”

“Okay, kiddo. Sorry about Pat — uh, I mean that,” Patton corrected himself quickly before turning his attention to the other two.

“I still think it’s probably something weird and evil, like some devil’s horns or — or pointed ears,” Roman insisted, gesturing to the vague areas that those body parts would be placed on himself.

“If Janus were to be hiding something underneath his hat — which I still have very significant doubts about — then it would probably be a result of his half-snake composition, such as a lack of hair on that side of his head, covered by scales,” Logan chimed in with an even tone.

“Well, yeah, maybe, but it still could be something… much more sinister that reveals how Thomas truly visualizes Deceit in his mind,” the prince suggested with a deep curiosity.

“Wouldn’t that be you, Roman?” Patton asked with an innocent smile.

“Wha—? No, I’m not a liar! I’m an actor but I am not Deceit,” Roman dismissed, clearly offended.

“No, that’s not what I meant, and I was talking about Janus, not evil,” Patton said, subtly reminding Roman to be kinder about the side in question. “I meant that the way Thomas views Deceit as a concept would be your creativity, kiddo,” he explained.

Roman paused for a moment. “I… suppose you’re right,” he agreed.

“That would make sense, though it would still have the influence of how Thomas feels about the concept of Deceit in genera—” Logan tried to elaborate, but was cut off by Roman.

“By Artemis’s beautiful bow, I think I know!” the creative side exclaimed with a wide gesture.

“You’ve… decided on a guess?” Logan prompted, frowning slightly in curiosity and pushing his glasses backwards as he scanned Roman with his eyes.

“Oh, brother, what is it now?” Virgil groaned, pulling his hood up over his head.

“That’s the spirit! What do you think, Roman?” Patton encouraged excitedly.

“Wolf ears,” Roman answered simply, as if the answer was obvious.

“Uh… might’ve misheard you there, Kiddo,” Patton fretted, leaning in a bit closer in hopes of understanding Roman’s words better.

“That… is an interesting guess. I suppose I could see some reasoning for this,” Logan mused, placing his knuckle against his lips in thought.

“Please tell me you’re not actually considering this, dude,” Virgil pleaded, pulling his sleeves over his hands.

“No, no, I’m serious!” Roman persisted, holding out his hands in a “wait” gesture. “From my best understanding of how Thomas views deception, he gets consistently stuck on the phrase ‘wolf in sheep’s clothing’ and sometimes he imagines liars as having certain wolf traits,” he finally explained. “Though, he usually only does that past 3am,” he added with a slight shrug before looking towards the rest of the group for approval.

“In addition to that, Janus does seem to... work alone, if you will, with his varying goals for Thomas — a lone wolf, perhaps,” Logan elaborated, “Wolves are also regarded for their intelligence and have very complicated social dynamics, maybe tying into Janus’s ability to use charisma to his advantage. Symbolically, wolves are also regarded as confident, which he definitely exhibits.”

“Come on, you don’t actually think Janus would have something as… as stupid as that,” Virgil disagreed, rubbing the back of his neck. Logan narrowed his eyes at the way he stumbled over his words.

“Virgil, I expected you to be less… concerned about this matter — furthermore, to mock him for it,” the logical side deduced, tilting his head slightly in confusion. “So… either you’re embarrassed about something similar or something is wrong here,” he declared, causing the room to fall silent for a few seconds.

“What’s wrong with Virge, Logan? Don’t just leave it all… ominous like that! It’s scary,” Patton fretted, looking at the side in question with worry.

At that moment, Virgil showed up, shoving aside the “Virgil” that had been there before, who was pushed into the wall and reverted back into his true form.

“Did someone say ‘scary?’” Virgil asked nonchalantly, giving Patton a quick glance before returning to glaring at Janus.

“Deceit!!” Logan yelled, pointing at Janus.

“Yes, yes, we’ve noticed, Logan, no need to sound the alarm, especially not so loudly,” Janus remarked.

“Virgil!” Patton and Roman exclaimed in unison with smiles.

“What was he doing here? What did he say?” Virgil asked, voice serious and impatient.

“Nothing much! Since I got here, he was just denying some of Roman and Logan’s theories about what’s under his hat,” Patton recounted.

“Yes, padre is right; that’s all the snake has done, nothing particularly evil or sinister,” Roman confirmed with a slight nod as if his valiant watch had kept Janus in check, whereas in reality he hadn’t really noticed.

Virgil snickered. “You mean ‘cause he’s insecure about this?” he asked with a mischievous smile as he managed to snatch Janus’s hat, revealing a pair of… dark wolf ears.

“Hah! I knew it! I called it! That was me, I was right. Got it before Logan,” Roman announced proudly before clearing his throat awkwardly and growing quiet to listen.

“Only because it was your interpretation of symbolism,” Logan muttered under his breath, petty.

“Aww, you’re like a teddy bear!” Patton commented with a gasp, “Or a puppy! Why would you hide this? We wouldn’t make fun of you for something so cute and nonthreatening!” He paused suddenly, realizing that he had just spoken the exact reason. “Ohh…” He grimaced slightly in guilt.

“Yes, well, isn’t this lovely. This is exactly what I wanted, Virgil, thank you,” Janus complained in annoyance, shooting the man in question a pointed look. “It’s obvious that this is totally a part of myself that I like and wanted to share with the group.”

“Janus, we won’t make fun of you for it, especially if you’re so insecure about it,” Patton reassured, looking around the room for agreement and receiving nods from everyone… as well as muffled snickers from Roman and Virgil.

“Grandma, what big ears you have,” Roman murmured quietly under his breath, unable to resist the temptation.

“What does it matter anyway? It’s clear I’m viewed as but a beast or a — a monstrous creature. Why would words make that any different?” Janus retorted to Patton, both his eyes and his phrasing giving away his hidden sadness.

“Well, Janus, you of all sides should understand the power that words can hold,” Logan reminded tersely.

“Regardless, Thomas could have at least chosen something scarier rather than just… an amalgamation of different animal symbols out of confusion,” Janus griped, gesturing into the air in frustration.

“Weird is better than scary if it’s constant. Trust me on this one,” Virgil insisted, though his expression turned to one of slight… sympathy?

“Trust isn’t exactly my strong suit,” Deceit responded, casting an unpleasant glance across the rest of the room. “I wonder why?” he added sarcastically.

“It’s not my department either but…” Virgil trailed off, sighing. “I can’t believe I’m going to say this to you of all people,” he muttered. “But… I know what it’s like to feel different and unnecessary and — and like you’re built to just be weird, to just be the outcast,” he admitted, avoiding looking into the half-snake’s eyes. “I know what it’s like but… it’s not like that here, not with them. Not with us,” he assured, fiddling with his sleeves.

“I think we all owe Janus an apology,” Patton pointed out. “I’m sorry for not respecting your privacy,” he said, looking at the aforementioned man with empathy.

“I apologize for my earlier behavior. I was curious but not considerate,” Logan chimed in concisely.

“I… suppose I’m sorry too,” Roman agreed, though he opened his mouth to say something else and closed it a moment later.

“I guess I shouldn’t have… done that,” Virgil mumbled, handing Janus his hat back. “But you shouldn’t have impersonated me either.”

“Very well, very well… I’m sorry for taking your place and deceiving you,” Janus replied, “though it did take them quite a while to catch on…”

“It is indeed odd that Janus’s impersonation of you is much more accurate than of me or Patton,” Logan commented, frowning again in contemplation.

“And that Virgil already knew about Janus’s ears,” Roman added, looking at Virgil in confusion.

“Well, I —” Virgil began nervously.

“— The little brat has done this before, you see,” Janus excused as he interrupted the anxious side. “It was terribly irritating,” he recalled about the false event, examining his nails through his gloves. “And yes, I’m afraid that the emo is the simplest to mimic -- it’s dreadfully easy,” he mocked, though said emo looked up at him when he realized that Janus had just… covered for him and his past as a dark side. That was not anywhere near what Virgil had expected.

“Ah, that would make sense,” Logan accepted with a slight nod.

“I, for one, still can’t decide whether his fluffy little ears are scary or, uh, adorable,” Roman admitted.

Janus scoffed and examined his nails through his glove. “If you’re disturbed by this, wait until you find out what Remus hides under his mustache,” he pointed out.

After a beat of silence, every other side in the room turned to him in a mixture of surprise, fear, and disgust, all exclaiming some variation of “hold up,” “wait,” or “what?!” Except for Patton, who simply remarked, “Well, I suppose we must-ask him later” with a chuckle.

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instasiswetrust · 3 years

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The hand around Nea's neck tightened, words choking up and dying inside her throat. Eyes that used to be blue now glinted red in the dim atmosphere of her kitchen, illuminated only by the light coming from the setting sun. No mercy or compassion could be found in those eyes, just a deep-seated hatred that scared her down to her very core.

"I think that's enough of your inane babbling, Nea." Dwight's voice was a purr, low and dangerous, filled with thinly veiled intent. She still manages enough spite to glare back at him.

"Now, now darling, no need to be like that." Dwight clicks his tongue like a disapproving parent. "None of this would've happened if you'd kept your dirty little mouth shut instead of talking shit about MY BROTHER."

The slap comes as a surprise to her, a second going by before the pain finally hits. She tastes something coppery and metallic at the back of her throat and realizes she has bitten her tongue. His hand around her neck has relaxed just enough for her to speak again so she does.

"It's not shit if it's the truth, Dweet." She sneers, eyes hard and flinty with anger. “Your beaner of a brother is a filthy slut who likes to suck PsychoMyers dick - Ack!"

"Shut. Up." Dwight watches her choke on her breath as his hand tightens once again. He's about done bothering with this bitch, and if he wastes any more time he was going to be late for dinner. And while mom could understand murder quite easily, being on time for dinner was a mandatory rule.

Without letting go of his holds, he turns to glance at the boy sitting on a stool by the kitchen island, watching him with an enraptured expression. There are two points of red high on his cheeks, and the hunger in his eyes sends a tentative shot of arousal through Dwight's spine.

"David, the bleach if you will?" The boy shook his head like a dog would before opening the cap of the gallon next to him and handing it over to Dwight. "Thank you."

David only offers him a shaky nod, his gaze shifting briefly to what Dwight thinks might be his lips before returning them to his face. It's a little funny how out of everything, this is what gets to David.

Turning back to Nea, Dwight doesn't even bother being flashy or dramatic. He forces her jaw open and pours the bleach, watching her choke on it. It burns her eyes, her throat, and the stench is absolutely disgusting but he doesn't stop until the gallon is half-empty and Nea Karlsson lies limp in his hold.

------

After the party, when he had called Nea out on her bullshit in front of everyone and promptly vomited on her expensive Adidas sneakers, he had assumed he wouldn't ever hear about the cheerleader clique again. Had even been fine with that. David was with him now, and he would always have Danny in his corner. He could let Nea think she had won, just this once.

Thing was, bitches never quite learn how to keep their mouths shut.

Dwight had gone to her house planning to fake an apology, David in tow telling him how it was a waste of time bothering with someone like her. But of course, Nea had had to mention Danny. Make fun of his little brother, of Michael, even mock Joey, and Susie. His friends. His pack. His family.

He remembered everything of course, to the smallest detail. How he had forged the note saying Nea was running away with another Alpha, thinking she would be hated if she stayed. David helped him carry the body to Max's pigpen. The way David's cock tasted on his mouth and the muffled sounds he had made as Dwight sucked him off in the back of his car.

It had been fun. The kind of heady high he had only felt once before when he had to clean up one of Danny's scenes because he had gotten himself stabbed.

And of course, no one at school suspected a thing. The student body ate up Meg's fake note so easily it was almost laughable. Dwight had assumed that had been it, and focused on his grades, filing everything that went through with Meg, Nea, and Kate to the back of his mind.

That was why Kate’s call took him by surprise.

"Dwight, please, you have to help me." Kate's pitchy, worried voice begged almost as soon as he accepted the call.

Dwight knew Kate, had become accustomed to the different shifts in her voice that marked her emotions more clearly than her expressions did. She wasn’t just worried, she was terrified but there was also an undercurrent of guilt there that made him take her words with a grain of salt.

"It's 11 pm, Kate. My heat only broke yesterday." He said flatly, not at all in the mood for her bullshit. Despite his heats being a mellow affair, his body was still sore and he wanted nothing but to bury himself back in his nest.

"Please." She was begging now and Dwight swore he could hear Ace's and Ash's drunken babble in the background. "Meg left me alone with Ash and Ace as one of her pranks, and they are really drunk. I'm... I'm really scared Dwight, please."

Oh. Yeah okay, he couldn't say no to that. Out of the three of them, Kate had always been the nicest, relatively speaking. She went along with whatever the other two told her to do sure, but that was about it. He was gonna regret this later for sure but right now all he knew was that he needed to get her out of there.

"Fine, okay. Lemme grab my mom's keys and I will be there. Text me your address in the meantime."

She thanked him profusely before cutting the call and Dwight sighed. With luck, Uncle Herman might be awake and could lend him two bottles of vodka laced with sedatives.

------

It had only taken a day. Just one. Now all the school was gossiping about how much of a slut Dwight was, having spent his heat with not one but two Alphas.

Ash and Ace had no proof of course, other than their words but this was high school. The veracity of things didn't have to be proven for people to believe them and as it was, Dwight had become an absolute social outcast in the last party. If the star Alphas of the football team claimed it was true, of course, it was.

"Danny, leave it. They are not worth it." He said for the second time as a group of cheerleaders went past their pack's table and made faces of disgust at Dwight.

"But Dwickyyyy ..." Danny pouted, and Dwight knew this was his brother's best front. Knew that there was fury and venom in his brother's dark eyes. Knew there was already a plot brewing there too. "I d-don't wanna."

But Dwight was adamant about this, shaking his head again and turning to face the whole pack who had different expressions of anger among them.

"No one gets to lay a hand on those two, you hear me? I will personally deal with them, myself. Is that clear?" Some of them nod, but others like Frank and David still snarl. This made Dwight frown, holding their gazes until they lowered their heads. "Good."

It was only later when Dwight was heading out of the locker room after a particularly tense cheer practice, that things started to get out of hand.

"What the bloody fuck did ye say about my boyfriend, ye git?" David's accent was unmistakable but the kind of vitriol that filled his voice was completely new to Dwight. It had him instantly separating from the team and making his way over to the source of the commotion.

There was a throng of people gathered around the base of the bleachers making it unable for Dwight to properly see what was happening. He was about to push his way through when the crowd suddenly parted, giving him a perfect view of the bloody mess that was inside.

Ace was bleeding profusely from a broken nose, his left eye was swollen almost shut, Ash was next to him, knuckles scraped and bloodied. He seemed fine, for the most part, his lip was split and there was a smear of bloody saliva on his cheek. Dwight didn't care about them though. It was who he saw in Joey's arms, nearly unconscious, that caused him concern.

From what he could see David had ended up almost as bad as Ace, blood running down his nose, lip split, right eye already swelling up, and knuckles scraped. If the way he seemed unable to walk straight on his own was any indication, Dwight fears he might have a concussion too.

"Fuckers started it," Joey said as soon as Dwight was close enough to listen to him. "Caught up with us just at the start of practice and started spouting shit about you. Bet they just wanted to get a rise out of him."

Dwight sighed, helping Joey sit David down by the benches. The younger Beta left to go pick up their things and Dwight busied himself cleaning off the blood caking his boyfriend's face and knuckles. He was frustrated, bordering on angry, and David must've scented it off him because he managed to frown despite the obvious pain it put him in.

"Ain't gonna say sorry for showing those gits what they get for slagging you off." He rasped, having to stop midway to spit a gob of congealed blood into the grass.

"Wasn't going to ask you to," Dwight said simply, prodding at his nose with careful fingers to make sure it wasn't broken. "But you need to trust me when I say I will take care of it."

"I trust ye, sweetheart. But I can't just sit back and do nothing when they come looking for a fight." David shot back, wincing slightly despite the softness of his boyfriend's touch.

"Technically, you can." David gave him a glare that Dwight matched with equal intensity until the Alpha looked away first. "Look, I'm not mad at you. They provoked you knowing full well you would react. I just hate it when you get hurt because of me."

"...Even if it's kinda hot?" David grinned.

"Even if it's kinda hot," Dwight confirmed, offering him a small smile.

-----

Three days later, Dwight finally enacted his plan.

He'd left a note for Ash and Ace to find, inviting them to the cemetery so they could reenact their threesome fantasies with him. The idiots had believed it all, hook, line, and sinker. It was almost funny how easy it had been.

Flattering clothes, and heeled boots, things that would look sexy but would be easy to clean afterward. Danny had done his make-up, something deadly that would match his leather gloves, brimming with excitement because Dwight finally got to enjoy a little murder.

So now he waited patiently for them to arrive, sitting primly on a headstone like the image of a proper Omega one would see in cheap romantic novels. David waited in the car, parked by the entrance of the graveyard, only because he had refused to allow him to do this without any backup.

At last, the two of them appear, looking awkward and nervous and a little drunk already. They reek of interested Alpha pheromones, which in turn threatens to make Dwight throw up but he kept his pleasant facade for now.

"Boys, you're here! Fantastic. We can finally start this." He chirped, voice high and happy.

Ash and Ace smirk, step closer, crowd him in the middle of the two like Dwight would try to escape or something. It irked him but he remained calm, rising a bit to wrap his arms around their necks and pull them closer. Neither of them noticed the thin syringes until it was too late.

"What the-" It was the only thing Ace managed to get out before he stumbled on his feet, falling on his ass. Ash didn't even manage to say anything before his knees gave and he fell to the ground face first, body a messy heap.

They were still conscious of course, his mom's special brew numbing their limbs but allowing them to stay awake. It was not something that showed up in general toxicology reports either, and thus had quickly become Dwight's favorite.

"You tried to rape Kate, almost got away with it even, had I not come help her out. Not satisfied with that, you chose to slander my name in front of the whole school." His voice was flat, emotionless, clinical. Rage simmered under the surface but there was no point in letting it drive his actions. Passion crimes were always the easiest to spot, and Dwight was not about to get caught over two idiots like these.

"That was the biggest mistake you could make." He positioned Ash's body so he was sitting with his back to a tombstone, facing Ace. Their terrified eyes stared at him horrified but he once again felt nothing, his mind an unperturbed lake. "Don't you think so too?"

When he was satisfied with how the two of them were posed, he slipped a folded note inside the pocket of Ash's varsity jacket, glad that his leather gloves would leave no remaining evidence on the soon-to-be corpses.

With the same overwhelming calm, he pulled out his custom-made colt 45, a gift from his mother. It was black with a white grip, engraved with golden vines over the barrel. A pretty little thing he rarely ever used, but it seemed fitting this time.

No more words left his mouth as he placed the gun in Ace's hands, making sure he'd got a proper grip on it before raising the gun to Ace’s head. There was no dramatic pause before he pulled the trigger, no tentative build-up. One moment Ace was alive, the next the left side of his head looked like hamburger meat.

Dwight made sure that none of the blood had gotten on him before moving over to Ash and doing the same thing. Worldless and instant. There was no point in stalling or watching them try to beg for mercy.

Once he'd triple checked the scene was flawless, he silently made his way back to the car where David was waiting for him. The swelling in his eye had gone down at last but he still looked worse for wear. Still, he grinned when he saw Dwight slide into the driver's seat.

"All done?"

"All done," Dwight confirmed, allowing his body to relax. He required a serious shower and even then he wasn't sure he would be able to scrub the hideous Alpha scent those two had covered him with.

"C'mere..." David murmured, pulling him closer so he could nuzzle firmly at both sides of Dwight's neck, marking him with his scent. It wasn't enough to completely dispel Ash's and Ace's scent, but it managed to take the edge off and settle Dwight's stomach.

"Thank you." He said honestly, pressing a kiss to his boyfriend's uninjured cheek. "Um..."

"What is it, darlin'?"

Dwight didn't want to appear needy or like he needed to be babied after kills. But the way Ash and Ace had crowded him, rubbed their scent over him, bothered him greatly. The Omega in him protesting with the hostile scents.

"Do you think you could stay over tonight?" He asked quietly, face once again tucked in the crook of David's neck. "I'm not bothered after killing them, it's just... I feel dirty with their scent all over me."

David hummed, threading his fingers through Dwight's messy hair. "Sure, sweetheart. Ye just need a little scenting, I can give ye that."

#adopted au #dbd #dead by daylight #dwight fairfield #david king #nea karlsson #ash williams #ace visconti #drabbles #dwight and danny are brothers in this au if that wasn't clear #alpha/beta/omega dynamics

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musedysfunctixn-m · 3 years

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Kanna Kuwajima - Demon Slayer: Kimetsu no Yaiba OC

“This is the Land of the Rising Sun, I will not allow your existence to desecrate this beautiful nation. Let me guide your soul to the after life.”

Aged 21 years old ( different ages can be played upon request )

Member of the Demon Slayer Corps

The current Thunder Hashira/Pillar

Kanna is a woman who stands at 167 cm ( 5′6″ ), she is characterized by her rather athletic build, though has plenty of distinct feminine features that are very striking. She is able to use a sword with a straight edged blade since she has enough physical prowess to decapitate a demon little to no problems. Despite a lot, Kanna is very agile, which can give her an advantage in any sort of conflict with ease. She has an hourglass body figure, though it’s rare visible, usually covered by her haori and uniform, she is the kind the that wears a skirt rather than the standard uniform pants. Her hair is black, often compared to the dark stormy sky during a thunderstorm at night, it progressively gets lighter and descends into a light yellow at the tips. It’s usually held in pigtails and pinned with two lightning pins. Her eyes are an orchid purple, making them very striking, though her hair seems to be her most notable feature when it comes to everything. To end this all off, she has a creamy peach skin complexion.

It’s not hard to see that she is a Thunder Breath Technique user, having mastered all of the forms that there are, much like Zenitsu and Kaigaku she was trained by Jigoro Kuwajima aka Gramps, who happens to be her biological grandfather. With her advanced sword skills, Kanna relies heavily on her instincts when it comes to anything combat related, as a result, fights are more than usually always in her favor since she can anticipate a whole lot. Fighting and combat are incredibly difficult because of this since she’s often described as being extremely unpredictable.

Kanna has the most wonderful people skills and truly cares about the happiness and well-being of others. People see her as a giver. Her primary way to evaluate people and situations is externally and this means that she considers everything based on how well it fits into her values systems. This makes her incredibly patient, understanding and kind. Because she has an outward focus on other people, she sees possibilities where others see obstacles. Kanna tends to have a natural ability to love, nurture, and care for others as well as bring out the best in them. She thoroughly enjoys seeing other people happy and having a good time. Kanna is extremely unselfish, but some may think she uses natural people skills to manipulate others. Kanna gets her nickname “The Protagonist” (and “mentor” or “teacher”) because she supports others. She genuinely cares about bringing out the best in others, and will use her skills to do so. People with her personality type will feel challenged by spending time alone. Being extraverted, this can seem like a punishment rather than the opportunity for rest and reflection that it really is. She finds herself filling her life with non-stop activity and more relationships than she can reasonably handle to avoid this discomfort. It’s essential that she consider her own needs to avoid burnout and being taken advantage of by others. Compared to other extraverted personality types, Kanna has more difficulty expressing her opinions and letting people get to know her at an intimate level. When she does express her beliefs, it’s not likely that they will be too personal. The main reason for this is that Kanna doesn’t want to alienate anyone. However, she then runs the risk of feeling lonely even when constantly surrounded by others because it’s hard for her to reveal her true self.

At a young age, Kanna’s home life wasn’t easy by any means, often being quite rowdy and causing trouble for her parents. As a child, she was incredibly outgoing and very much acted like a tomboy, being far from refined like her parents wanted her to be. She was often subjected to having her social interaction limited because of the way that she ended up acting around other children, even though she was nothing but friendly. Time and time again, she got told that no one would want her or accept her for the way that she ended up acting. Eventually a breaking point was reached and it all came crashing down when her father and mother openly ridiculed her out in public. Kanna was only 7 when this all happened. Not long after, she ran away to live with her grandfather that her family no longer associated with. A friendly traveler was able to help her get their safely without getting harmed or anything.

From that time forward, she trained with her grandfather, the retired Thunder Hashira. There were no problems teaching her from such a young age especially with her strong fighting spirit. She learned very quickly and had little struggle when it came to the various Thunder Breathing forms, being a very promising Demon Slayer in the making. Much like everyone else, at age 15 she went to Final Selection upon approval from her grandfather that she was very much ready to move forward. Before the Final Selection process happened, she briefly met both Giyuu and Sabito who were also there. She did happen to be quite chatty with them. Of course, she didn’t hear of the tragedy until much later on. After about a year of advancing her skills and mastering them, Kanna filled the vacant Thunder Hashira position. Through the years, she had the opportunity to go back and visit her grandfather, meeting both Kaigaku and Zenitsu. It was very much intended for Kanna to take Kaigaku on as her Tsuguko, but this didn’t happen due to constant clashes in he and Kanna’s personalities. Zenitsu becoming her next consideration, though she very much waited on him to get a better hold on himself so that she could.

She is seen to have good relations with all the other Hashira and she always tries her hardest to stay in the good graces of all of them since they are her allies. Despite having two biological siblings that Kanna has never met, she has plenty of self proclaimed ones. Primarily Shinobu and Mitsuri, very much acting like the elder sister to the other two female Hashira. Of course, Zenitsu being the other one, mostly since she promised her grandfather that she would keep an eye on him and look after her. So, it’s not uncommon for her to periodically check up on him, even if she comes off as somewhat overbearing and he doesn’t want to have her around, she still puts forth the effort to try, even if it ends up being a major pain. When it came to the whole situation with Tanjiro and Nezuko, she remained heavily unbiased and didn’t really offer a proper opinion, though she very much understands the situation and fully supports Tanjiro having his sister around.

SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT!!!

Just like all the other Hashira, Kanna very much struggled with the death of Kyojuro and it was hard for her to cope since it was so sudden. If anything, she just struggled to come to terms with the fact that one of the strongest Hashira had ended up dying. It was just hard for her to wrap her brain around. However, when the time came, she readily accepted Yūna into their Hashira ranks, mostly because she was sure that her predecessor would’ve wanted her to fit in rather than be some sort of outcast. Once again, Kanna willingly added the other girl to her list of self proclaimed siblings. She and Yūna becoming a duo. Prior to the Red Light District Arc, she did offer Zenitsu a lot of encouragement when it came to the mission he would be participating in. Also including how important and crucial he was to the mission that he was about to go on. She was there to bid him farewell and good luck before he left with Tengen.

When it came to the final training before the final battle, Kanna worked with Yūna to make a stealth training exercise, just so that everyone wasn’t so spread thin. Admittedly, she and Yūna made the exercise very difficult, since it was stealth and it was meant to be hard since it would be such a huge asset. Nothing can compare to the amount of strenuous training that she undertook just to make sure that she was prepared. Though, more than anything it was used to cope with the unexpected passing of her grandfather, who had committed seppuku. Such a thing was incomprehensible to her, especially since he had the person who practically raised her after she had up and left her parents. In the end, it kind of broke her will to fight anymore with the fear that she would lose a lot more because of the final battle that lie ahead. Yūna was the one who helped her pull it all together, since she knew as well as anyone that they would probably need all the strength they had to achieve victory.

During the final battle, Kanna was constantly drifting between different fights to help the best that she possibly could. Mostly being caught up in the fight that was happening between Zenitsu and Kaigaku then attending to Zenitsu’s wounds the best that she possibly could before she moved onto the next fight. It was extremely exhausting, but she did all that she possibly could to help with what was going on. Along the way, she did sustain a fairly life threatening injury, but kept fighting despite how bad that it was. Of course, she fought alongside the few remaining Hashira as everything came to a close. She nearly succumbed to her injury and spent a long while just recovering from it, though it allowed for a lot of self reflection on her part and she was frequented by Yūna and Zenitsu throughout her recovery process. With the three others, she attended the last Hashira meeting before seeking to live a peaceful life at her grandfather’s estate that he left to her.

#( ─┄°♕ ooc; shut up del )#( ─┄°♕ tw; death mention )#( ─┄°♕ kanna kuwajima )#( ─┄°♕ yūna hosotaki )#( ─┄°♕ demon slayer: kimetsu no yaiba )#( i just )#( i just love kanna man )#( she's so strong and amazing )

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donotexterminateupgradepudding · 4 years

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Lucifer Morningstar is an introvert. A very awkward and unusual introvert.

In an attempt to not create a bunch of random side-blogs, I’m just going to drop this here. Sorry Doctor Who/Torchwood fans.

With the whole covid-19 thing, I’ve been trapped at home more than I had anticipated recently and I was looking for something a bit more fun and frivolous to watch so I finally gave Lucifer a go.

I honestly don’t know why it took me so long to get to this, my brother had watched it when it was on tv and had mentioned it in passing several times. Suffice to say, once I finally gave into Netflix, I found it to be quite an enjoyable watch.

What really struck me in the serious is how it becomes obvious that Lucifer is an introverted character who is hurt. Wait - what you are thinking? He’s an introvert? Oh man, he’s totally a huge introvert.

Let me walk you through why he’s clearly an introvert despite a quick glance at his outward actions.

1.) Hiding in plain sight.

An interesting aspect to his personality is how he hides in plain sight. When he moves to LA, he rents the building that houses Lux and his penthouse suite. Lux is a place where he is surrounded by people, if he wants to partake in revelry all he needs to do is go downstairs and party with people in the club. However, he can also retreat to his place easily which is surprisingly well stocked with books and another piano for him to play in private. I doubt all of his books are for show, he frequently denies thinking deeply about things, but he always seems to be one step ahead of others which has always implied to me he plays the “I’m smarter than I look/act” card. Early on in the show, he occasionally invited people up to his place to party but it wasn’t a common experience. Think of the pizza delivery guy being invited to stay and party.

Despite his love of drinking, drug use and sex, he makes it quite clear that drinking and drug use rarely have an effect on him for long. He is rarely hung over or wasted since his metabolism clears the alcohol too quickly for him to feel it and on multiple occasions he states he mainly drinks as he likes the taste. One of the few times he was high was after he smoked a massive amount of pot at the teenage delinquent recovery farm as indicated by him sitting at the detective’s desk eating potato chips and dipping them in nutella realizing it was an amazing flavor combination. For him, drugs seem to simply be something that is fun and a way to amuse himself and based on his drinking, it is mainly a way to meet and socialize with people.

As far as the sex, it is clear that he uses his casual hook-ups as a fun distraction. To avoid any possible intimacy with others, he hides behind the fact that sex is a pleasurable act and by keeping his sex life 100% casual, no person in his or her right mind would even consider dating him. He has made himself impossible to be seen as possible long term boyfriend in a steady relationship. He likely struggles with his own angelic power to pull out people’s desires and his ability to seduce them. Since his default is to have people literally throw themselves at him, he likely sees most of them acting in response to his powers and necessarily to him as a person. As he wants people to follow their desires and free-will (as he simply removed the inhibitions that were present and did not create them) he gladly indulges them as well as himself. If I were him, I’d be like “well why not?” an attractive person wants to sleep with me, sure do it, no harm, no foul.

I found it most telling based on how sensitive he is to his sexual reputation as well as his ability to meet his current sexual partner’s needs. First off, when a random kid pretended to be him, he was incredibly upset that his imposter lacked his skills. He’s Lucifer Morningstar, he has skills and a reputation associated with them. Secondly, when the detective decided to interview his previous partners for the past 8 weeks (all 92 of them) two things were very obvious i.) he went to great lengths to make sure no matter what he did, that person had the most amazing sex of his or her life ii.) not a single person he slept with saw it as anything more than an amazing night of no strings attracted sex. His actions did not inspire them to want more of a relationship from him. How his facial expression become quite sad as all 92 of them stated it was just empty sex showed how alone he is. Another unusual trait is that he has been the most sexually responsible angel ever. Granted, the vast majority of angels were never going to have sex in the first place, yet he has a much more responsible track record than Amenadiel. It is clear that he has had sex with thousands upon thousands of humans over the years and he never once resulted in a human-angel pregnancy. This may also be linked to the fact that Amenadiel by default, desires a ‘normal’ regular relationship while Lucifer has been avoiding having a “normal” relationship. It would imply that if he found someone to have a kid with, he would be in a “normal” long term relationship with that person.

Overall, his first career on earth was to make sure he had an establishment that represented what he felt others perceived as his core personality, that as the devil, he would have to surround himself by partying and temptations. Owning Lux is a way for him to keep up appearances and maintain his public persona as well as his persona that is seen by celestial beings. Lucifer is a classic example of a character who is totally alone in a crowd.

2.) Few close friends

Another true introvert trait is to have a small tight knit group of friends. Lucifer fits to this exactly. He has excellent social skills, and again due to his former job and his nature, yet does many actions by smooth, polite and calculated actions - from a distance. His job of granting favors is based on how he knows someone, who knows someone, forming a vast network he has to draw upon to make sure that the favors work out the way the person would like them to. He doesn’t do the favors though because he cares for the person, more than he seems to do it to pass the time until he finds a job with more meaning.

It is starting his second job as a civilian consultant for the LAPD that his preference and need for a small friend group becomes obvious. The most obvious one is his relationship with Chloe.

Chloe Decker: He is first intrigued at why his powers do not work on her, his immediate physical attraction to her as well as seeing her as a kindred spirit also drew him to her. She is the outcast of the department and he knows all too well what it feels like to be the literal outcast. As a result of their common situation and the fact he can’t sway her, the two of them can speak openly and honestly. Granted, the biggest issue with his relationship with Chloe is the fact that she denies the obvious truth that he tells her even though she has seen enough evidence that he likely is not some random British guy living in LA running a high end nightclub.

As their relationship deepens he begins to find comfort in the fact that despite his inability to influence her, she still appreciates his company and values him as a friend and a work partner. Even though he panics and holds her miracle status against her at first, he comes to realize she can’t be held responsible for something she has no control of and is unaware of. Linda time and time again tries to get him to realize that he keeps her away due to his absolute fear that she would reject him. Since she’s the only person who could accept him as is, it means her acceptance of him is the biggest risk to his own heart in regards to her.

In part, his complicated relationship is tied to his fear that she would reject him, so him loving and caring for a single person as he does for her is too risky. He’s a seriously hurt dude, he’s terrified of being hurt anymore by someone he cares for. Chloe really takes a long time to realize how deeply he is hurt. I get that she’s his opposite but I do felt out of all of the characters, she got short end of the stick in regards to character development. Everyone else has had major changes and realizations yet she only sort of struggled with Lucifer’s identity in the first half of season 4 and she was off her “mark” when she was a bit preachy with him. Thankfully, she stopped that bit and realized that he more needed her to listen to him and to support him. It really got that concept that sometimes you need to just be there for someone and not try to fix it - since Chloe is a fixer.

Mazikeen: She is his right-hand woman. The only demon to leave hell to follow him to earth, she first acted as his personal assistant, running the day to day operations of Lux and also working as a bartender. Despite all of their conflicts, they care deeply for each other and have each other’s back.

The hardest part of growth in their relationship is when it went from master-servant/boss-assistant to more that of peers. Even as he began to change in how he worked with humans, he keep their relationship as their default from hell. He really hurt her feelings since she developed feelings and both of them are terrible at expressing them to others. They have a relationship and work dynamic that they had for thousands and thousands of years - it is pretty impressive that they are learning and growing in a relatively short time period to respect each other and mature.

I found the most emotionally moving parts between them to be in season 3 when Chloe begins to get involved with Cain/Pierce and he expresses his worry that at least he has her and she’ll never leave him. Maze interprets this as him being selfish and treating her as his number 2. She lashes out at him and all he does is look back at her in return is hurt as he almost quivers. Since she was his right hand woman in hell, she is the person with whom he has had the longest and most trusting relationship with since being cast into hell. Did he phrase things in a way that helped in the situation - no. But was he telling her his honest feelings that he really does feel like she is someone who is always there for him and supports him - yes. When she goes behind his back to work with Cain/Pierce, he’s hurt and feels betrayed. Sure, some of it is karmic payback for the times he’s hurt her, but after his failed experiment with Abel, he has every right to not just pop willy-nilly between earth and hell.

I have the vibe that they will eventually settle into a sibling like relationship treating each other the same way he interacts with his angel siblings like Amenadiel and Azrael.

Ella Lopez: So far Ella has been the only human friend that he has worked with with whom he hasn’t used his angelic charms on. He was uncomfortable around her at first; she’s religious, she’s outwardly friendly and very much into giving hugs. Ella “wastes” her time on what he would see as pointless pleasantries in the office. Yes, Lucifer will lay on the pleasantries, but his always have a purpose - Ella’s are just her being nice. He did like her opinion that the devil got a bad rap, but then she kept thinking he was a method actor in addition to being a nightclub owner.

Despite their obvious differences the two of them are both very straightforward people who have a strong sense of personal justice and are dedicated to solving the crimes. He quickly begins to joke around with her and with her four older brothers, she finds no issue with dealing with his antics - it is more like par for the course.

The fact that Azrael also couldn’t help but become friends with her seems to indicate she has some sort of personality that celestial beings really like, especially those who have the shittier jobs e.g. Lucifer running hell and punishing and Azrael being the angel of death dealing with, well, death. The fact that she made sure Ella would become friends with Lucifer was really sweet and even though he was at first upset since he doesn’t like people trying to manipulate with him, he realized that Azrael’s action was in right place. She got her favorite brother and favorite human to become friends since she knew they would get along even if she couldn’t be with them - you know, having the whole angel of death as her day job.

His love of Ella as a friend though came out when her older brother Jay was in town and mixed up in the illegal diamond cleaning. Yes, he brought his own feelings with his older brother into the mix, but he was correct. Jay is not the absolutely perfect brother, he was involved in shady stuff. I think when he confronted Jay was one of the best scenes in regards to him standing up for and protecting his friends. He made it very clear that if Jay ever hurt Ella again he’d be in trouble as he knew how important it was to her to continue to see her brother in her own most positive light.

I really get the vibe that they feed off of each other being goofballs - Ella was a nerd and picked on as kid and had a lot of issues to deal with. He’s the cast out son, they are both outcasts on the rebound and they like to have fun with each other. This really comes to a head in season 4 when Lucifer, Chloe and Ella go to the nudist colony. Chloe is a complete stick in the mud and by the time she turns around the two of them are naked and ready to go. As adults on their own and away from their family and their former “teenage” issues they finally get to be who they want to be and I just think their dynamic duo antics are adorable. She is the friend that will do silly things with him while Chloe remains too, well stoic. When Ella has her crisis of faith, Lucifer doesn’t fan the flames instead, he’s confused how to react so he doesn’t tell her what to think.

Trixie: She immediately loved Lucifer from the moment she met him. He is incredibly awkward with her. He’s not sure to do with her little kid hugs, he tries to not hold her hand when they investigate the elite private school. Yet, no matter how frequently he calls her a little urchin and doesn’t understand why she likes him, she grows on him.

I personally loved her bedroom sign in the first season - “Trixie’s room - no boys allowed - except for Lucifer.”

Trixie is a classic example of kid radar seeing people for who they are; she accepts Lucifer and Maze with no judgement, she just sees them as these rad adults whom she can play with.

I really liked when he tried to buy her the new doll since she destroyed her old one - in a way he respected her kid logic - did it teach her a lesson - no. But it was a logical extension as a means to an end. He came from a background of illogical parenting so to speak. He dealt with rules that didn’t always make sense it is clear he spent too much time pondering them thus leading to his current situation.

Does he like other children still? Not really, he still didn’t know what to do when he touched a kid’s head with a little pat as his backyard picnic with Cain as he wiped his hand on his sweater. Yet, since he has gotten to know Trixie through his interactions with her it is clear that he likes her.

Dr. Linda Martin: Dr. Martin is my fav female character on the entire show as she is a compassionate, caring and intelligent individual and a secret badass. Her relationship with Lucifer started how all of his interactions with people who desire him do - with her wanting to sleep with him. Over time, she realizes that she can’t and shouldn’t be sleeping with him and he also begins to realize that he can work with her without having to pay her with his body and pay her the normal way - with money. He learns to treat himself with more respect and not just give away himself to her. Showing a bit of a shift in how he sees himself with those he actually knows.

I think she really was his first example of how to have a normal human transaction with well, a human. She is incredibly patient with him and even when he reveals his true self to her, she is able to accept him with a little nudge from Maze. Despite being overwhelmed due to his families odd demands on her and almost killed by his very upset and stressed out mother, she protects him as a client and as a friend.

Sure, he always interprets her advice in interesting ways and she knows him well enough to realize that he avoids things and is in denial but she always still cares for him. He also does frequently figure out what she wants him to realize - he just likes to make it more difficult for himself. I wonder if the more that they got to know each other, his ability to influence her waned as she saw him as more than a playboy and he saw her as a doctor who could help him and later as a good and trusted friend.

Most importantly, she never gives up on him and truly believes in him despite all of his detours and distractions. When he has his identity crisis in season 4, she is the first person he shows his devil wings to. This comes from a place of deep trust in her and even though she can’t help him, she is there for him as a friend.

I don’t think he’d ever admit it to her directly, but Lucifer likely understands that Linda’s friendship with Maze has helped Maze grow as a person - er demon - and her advice has helped him in how he interacts with her learning how to change his relationship with her from boss-assistant to more that of peers and friends.

Dan Espinoza: Oh yes, despite all of their stupid male ego headbutting, Lucifer is friends with Dan and he does care for the man. When they first met, Dan was definitely a being a bit of a dick to Chloe; mainly by keeping his own secrets to protect her even though it drove her nuts. If anything bothers Lucifer more it is people lying and hiding things from him. Lucifer is almost pathological with telling the truth and not lying; and well Dan was not the most honest at the beginning.

So of course, he received full on Lucifer hazing; once the police admin punished him by demoting him for messing with evidence he slowly became more sympathetic to Dan. He did use his skills to get Dan to admit that he wanted to correct his mistakes and when Dan started to lose it with Azrael’s blade, he saw that Dan was a stronger and more complicated man than he wanted him to be. If Dan were a simple man, driven by simple desires and actions, Lucifer could write him off. But Dan isn’t, his biggest change is when he realized he needed to stop calling him Detective Douche and actually call him Dan, in part due to Dan standing up to his teasing.

Was it right for Lucifer to keep up his petty antics for so long? Likely not, but Lucifer learned that some of Dan’s actions and personality traits are actually good things and his day shadowing Dan was annoying for poor Dan, but at least allowed him to realize that not everyone is the same.

Lucifer also has been more honest about his feelings in front of Dan than many others - when they went to get a favor from the Russian mob boss, he freely admitted his own hatred for himself and how he hurts everyone he cares about. If he said that in front of Chloe or Ella, both of them would rush to tell him it isn’t true and he’s being too hard on himself. Instead, Dan kept his distance and realized that both of them think the grass is greener on their side of the fence. Lucifer is secretly jealous of Dan’s more simple approach to things and Dan thinks Lucifer truly is careless and wishes he could be a flippant as he appears to be.

Dan really is a reminder how how Lucifer is unable to open up to others and make himself more vulnerable. Unfortunately, this results in Dan frequently getting hurt and he makes epic bad decisions in season 4 out of grief over Charlotte’s death, blaming Lucifer for all of his pain. But no matter what happens, it is clear that Lucifer would not wish for bad things to happen to Dan as he is a good guy and a capable detective.

Is their friendship a perfect one? Far from it, but both of them really do try to care and support the other guy as long as they aren’t pissed off at each other. It likely doesn’t help that Lucifer’s friendship with Dan is pretty much his only one with a normal human guy. He’s got plenty of angelic brothers and Cain really isn’t normal by a long shot so it makes Dan even more important to have him in his circle of close friends. As a 100% totally normal dude, Dan acts frequently as the ‘in’ to understanding (or really lack of understanding) what is happening.

Eve: I just finished re-watching season 4. I’m still not sure where I’d place Eve in all of this. She’s only in season 4 so far and based on her actions, I’m not sure I’d call her one of his close friends. If anything she was pretty much an impediment to all of his relationships - albeit maybe not quite on purpose . . . she’s a woman who still hasn’t figured out who she is despite realizing she needs to not define herself in the context of a relationship.

Sorry for not having more thoughts on this, I need to ponder it more.

What I will say is that their relationship issues stem from the fact that he is an introvert and she’s an extrovert. He realized that Eve was a “bad” influence on him and he struggled to express his feelings to her. The fact that it takes him shouting out at her that he “doesn’t like who he is when he’s with her” was painfully difficult for him to say. It is clear that he cares about her deeply and he wants her to be happy. Yet, he can’t and really doesn’t want to deliver on her actions or feelings. The worst part is that it tears him up inside since in a way he saw her as a possible long term partner which was a big deal for him.

3.) Works either alone or in small groups.

When it comes to his role with the LAPD, Lucifer’s modes of action are not that of a typical extrovert. He is either working closely with his partner Chloe, or occasionally with Ella or Dan. He is never part of a large group nor is he taking a typical leadership role. Due to his need to protect others and his need to get answers as quickly and directly as possible, he frequently goes off on his own. In part, this is so that he can take full advantage of his angelic powers and immortality, but also to protect those he cares about. Sure, he walks into a Korean gang headquarters and tells them to come out, but he doesn’t try to chit chat or smooth things over with them. He goes in, finds the head boss and pretty much strikes a deal with him that he can’t refuse. When he wants an answer his methods are far too direct. Find suspect/target/person and just question them or threaten them and then question them. There is no charming and social games. He can’t be bothered with banal pleasantries when he wants to know something. If Lucifer were a true extrovert he would want to talk to others and feed off of the energy he gets from being with them - yet - he never has shown this. He sees getting information as a task he needs to complete as quickly and efficiently as possible.

Even though he is hurt when Chloe and Cain become closer and begin to hang out or work cases without him, he still shows up and does work to help out with cases. He also is good at working by himself and is able to work things out when he applies himself.

He also has an excellent sense of intuition when reading people. Of course, one of the major aspects of the show is that he projects his own issues onto others. This leads him off of what they are doing sometimes, so his read isn’t quite right. But he is perceptive when he sees odd behaviors and is able to connect things without full information. This is both what he did with Ella’s brother Jay and more importantly with Pierce/Cain. He invites him for a drink and then stabs him with the knife. He looks incredibly nervous after he kills him as he can’t kill a human as an angel - he keeps switching between trying to be calm and have a drink while he waits for him to wake up with a nervous sweat. Did he know for sure Pierce was Cain? No, hence the nervousness until his intuition was proven correct was his true feelings on his gamble.

Furthermore, when he does work with Chloe or others, he always has their back and will go to any length to work with them. This to me indicates that he finds working with a select few people with whom he can trust is how he is most comfortable and he doesn’t need to be the center of attention and the one in charge like how he was in charge of hell. It is clear that by the end of season 4 even though he returned to hell it wasn’t because he enjoyed to or wanted to - it was because he had to protect everyone he cared about. He also has a natural chemistry and ease working with Chloe where even in tough situations they instinctively know what to do and how to act.

4.) He expresses himself through actions.

Lucifer is an incredibly hurt individual. He was punished by having to take a job that he didn’t even want or even desire and most of his family abandoned him. He’s terrified to open up and show his true feelings and pain to others as they would take advantage of it as a weakness to hurt him further. Honestly, I think he still doesn’t quite understand how his actions landed him in hell. He was questioning the establishment and it is clear he thinks deeply about rules and how they influence others. Anything he thinks is illogical he ignores as he can’t be bothered to care to follow those rules and conventions. I think about how he made Chloe rethink the “swear jar” for Trixie - he pointed out rules without a clear basis don’t make sense.

Since he struggles to express his feelings in a way to help others. e.g. mainly in his denial/fear to tell Chloe he truth does two things; i.) he makes it about him or ii.) he tries to demonstrate through his actions.

The making it about him method, is a subtle way where he wants to know how to solve his own problem to help him understand or interact with others. But since he doesn’t want to say for example “I need to figure out how Cain can die since I promised him and I am true to my word.” he instead hides behind the idea of “I need to find the author’s killer so I can read how she got over her writers block.” By extension, since the manuscript is an instruction guide, he thinks he’ll learn something so that he can follow through on his promise. It is a very obtuse way to act, but since he hides behind his narcissistic facade no one will understand he’s not doing it for himself.

As far as his actions, he really shows it when he reorganizes Chloe’s desk; he realizes that she deals with all the paperwork and since she is capable she gets even more paperwork piled on to her workload. He cleans up her mess and anal retentively arranges her pencils and makes sure the right angles on the files are all lined up. He also found a method of filing that makes more sense to him and it inadvertently helps her find the missing piece of evidence for their most recent case. I liked how he color coded everything. Did he need to add the picture of him in his underwear as her backdrop? Hell no, but he figures out that since she likes him, what’s wrong with her seeing a part of him that she likely will never see.

This also gets him into trouble; again, buying the doll for Trixie, trying to out perform Cain in gifts for Chloe and always seeing things as a competition. He wants to give people physical proof of his care for people without actually saying it. Specifically he wants to express his care through a tangible amount of some sort of physical object.

5.) He hides behind his narcissistic behaviors.

As Lucifer struggles to come to terms with himself and expressing his feelings he has hid behind his narcissism. What is a great way to keep people away from you and keeping your distance from them? Being completely self-absorbed with yourself that no one would ever want to be friends with you. His narcissism is a HUGE turnoff for the vast majority of the population.

It is so clear that he wants to develop close relationships but he’s so afraid of hurting others and even more so hurting himself. He’s hid behind his hedonistic behaviors and his self-absorbed actions for thousands of years. He really is a very particular person; he is constantly adjusting his sleeves under his suit coat, his shoes are always perfect, he moisturizes and his hair is styled elegantly. He likes things arranged elegantly and it shows how important control is to him. If he is 100% in control of everything, again he’s protected from being hurt.

As he works at the LAPD and forms his important friendships, his appearance changes. In the first season, he wears black or dark grey suits, his shirts are white, black, dark purple, dark blue and grey, if I recall correctly. He keeps his look simple and professional, almost cold. His matching pocket squares are also basic and mainly a single solid color with few patterns.

Yet overtime, he becomes more adventurous in his appearance, he starts wearing more light blue shirts, he begins to add in more color with burgundy, forest green, and even a caramel colored suit. His pocket squares become more interesting with patterns and more color combinations. With the increase in color and variety he appears much more approachable and has more of an air of friendliness even though he still only cares for his small group of friends.

A case that was a real struggle for him was with the online dating app for “fabulous” people - Top Meet. He wanted to continue to judge people based on superficial appearances, as it has been his own wall and it has served him well. When they ultimately confront the killer, his own knowledge of nature and narcissists allows him to save the day by tossing the head sculpture at him and the detective can apprehend him.

His car serves as both another front and also shows how he longs for few intimate friendships or relationships. He’s got that lovely little Corvette and it is a two-seater. He doesn’t drive a giant, flashy car that can fit lots of people. Instead, he has a small almost cute (I personally think it is cute) car that only another person can sit in. He only wants to ride with one person at a time as he values his close relationships. Yet, having a car that only can fit one other passenger shows a part of his narcissistic front - that only a person who he’d see as worthy would be able to ride with him.

Overall, by looking at how Lucifer chose to have a job on earth in a nightclub where he could simply hide was the first indication he’s an introverted character. The longer he has been in LA, the more close friendships he has formed and they are very important to him as well as his oldest friendship with Maze. When he realized that Maze was attracted to Eve, he noticed it, but hasn’t made mention of it yet (likely that will happen in season 5). The fact that he noticed it meant he really has stopped seeing her as his right hand woman and more just as an individual with feelings. His close friendships really show that he’s an introvert not an extrovert. It is obvious that he gains meaning and connection from these close relationships in a way he never experienced before. His preference for working either alone or in a small team also shows that he is much more comfortable as well as his preference to express himself through actions as opposed to using words since that is much harder and more uncomfortable. Lastly, by hiding himself from all others behind a self-absorbed image he has been able to keep others away from him for thousands of years.

The major point about his character growth is learning that having a small support group of real friends and family he can find what he’s been looking for. A place to belong and be accepted.

#lucifer tv #lucifer #lucifer morningstar #chloe decker #mazikeen #maze #linda martin #dr. linda martin #dan espinoza #ella lopez #trixie decker

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mylovelyfandoms · 4 years

Text

Chan’s Backstory

The Symbol of the Raindrop

Basic Information

A/N: I read over Hansol’s Backstory and I realized I accidentally wrote that they spoke English so sorry about that...

Warnings: The word ‘condom,’ teenage pregnancy, abandonment, bullying, guilt, and I think that’s it??

(GIF not mine)

- It all started with a young couple

- It was the first day of summer for their school, so they went to a friend’s party in celebration of their freedom

- Everything was perfect

- But then, one shot too many and a three year old condom later, the girl started to feel off

- For a couple of days, it was just a feeling in her chest

- But then, she started throwing up at routine times in the morning

- She started to feeling tired and fatigued even when she wasn’t doing anything

- The girl told her boyfriend, but he just brushed it off

- But she was still suspicious

- So she went to the local pharmacy and bought the one stick that would determine the rest of her life just by peeing on it

- And there was a plus sign

- Once she told her boyfriend, the young couple agreed to run away together, terrified of what their parents would do if they found out

- So they took all the money they could from their savings and just started driving

- They drove all around the land of the unaffected and ended up a couple of towns down where no one knew who they were

- They had new lives

- And nine months later, the girl went into labor

- The two went to the local doctors and prepared for a natural birth

- But the girl spiked a fever of 40 Celsius

- So they rushed her to the operating room and started on a C-section

- When they finally managed to cut her open and take her baby boy out, they nearly dropped him back in

- The baby’s skin was burning like he was on fire

- So he must have caught her fever

- It wasn’t exactly the only diagnosis they had for this baby, but it was definitely the one they hoped was true

- The young couple were lucky enough to stumble into a hospital that was accepting of the affected

- They kept him in the NICU (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit) for a couple of days to keep an eye on him

- And a week later, his temperature was back down to a normal baby’s and they were able to take him home

- They named their baby ‘Chan’ and loved him to bits and pieces

- They had a nursery for him with dinosaur wallpapers and stuffed animals

- Chan’s dad was a little obsessed with dinosaurs

- The three of them were a happy little family for a good year until their parents found them

- Chan’s grandparents were furious

- They were disgusted with the baby and forced the three of them to go home

- And once they did, there was a lot of arguing

- The adults were trying to drill it into the young couple that there was a possibility that Chan could be an affected and wanted to bring him to get tested

- But Chan’s parents refused

- They were a part of the younger generation and detested the way that the adults outcasted the affected

- They wanted to keep Chan safe no matter what

- But with some horrible luck, Chan started to cry and scream at all of the arguing

- When Chan’s mother walked up to him in an attempt to calm him down, he swung his hand, his body glowing orange as a flame hit his mother’s face

- She cried out and fell to the floor, but that only made Chan cry even harder

- Chan’s father immediately ran to his girlfriend’s side and tried to soothe her

- Chan’s father went with his girlfriend and her family to the hospital, leaving his son with his own parents

- He trusted that they wouldn’t do anything, but boy was he wrong

- Chan’s grandparents wrapped him in a blanket, placed him in a basket, and made their way to the soldier base

- They set him down in front and banged on the doors, turning around and left him behind

- Upon seeing him, the soldiers brought Chan in to start testing him in ways they should never do to a baby

- Once they learned Chan was able to manipulate fire, he was sent to the closest facility to that base

- The other affected that were watching the newcomers were horrified when they saw a baby in the group of new kids

- And since he was brought in so young, he couldn’t work yet

- So he grew up in a cell

- He was basically adopted by the oldest ones in his cell since none of the soldiers were going to take care of him

- But he was still too young to understand anything that was happening

- He barely even understood what was going on when he turned three and all of his caretakers were taken away

- All he knew was that he was left behindagain

- Two year later, he was brought into the testing room again

- Chan was confused to say the least when he wasn’t able to make fire like he had been before

- And then he was absolutely bewildered when he was able to lift a piece of the floor up just by stomping

- He was then brought into the next room where they held him down and lifted his shirt, drawing a tattoo at his lower abdomen

- He didn’t even scream or struggle

- He was used to the pain already at this point

- Almost right after, he was thrown into work

- He was herded into the rest of the ‘E Raindrops’ as the soldiers called them

- There were a couple of people he recognized from his cell so he tried to go up and talk to them

- But then they were taken away by the soldiers for socializing when they weren’t supposed to

- That was the first time Chan was beat

- From then on, the rest of the affected avoided Chan

- They didn’t want to get beat just by talking to him

- Even if that wasn’t the case

- But that never stopped Chan

- He kept trying to talk to people around him in the cells or during mealtime

- Never at work anymore...he learned his lesson

- But his reputation preceded him so people either snapped at him to leave them alone or just ignored him

- Some kids eventually started to mess with him for the fun of it

- They knocked his food tray out of his hands, knowing that he would either have to eat it off the filthy floor or starve

- They knocked him over when he was focusing on his work

- They even beat him when they were out in the courtyard

- And of course the bullies never had to worry about the soldiers because they were probably just watching with amusement

- So eventually, Chan just stopped talking to people

- He stopped going up to them and asking if they wanted to sit together at meal time

- He just sat quietly and didn’t even speak up when the bullies messed with him

- So one day, the same group of bullies were doing what they usually did

- They were trying to corner Chan since it would be easier to beat up the poor kid

- When they were barely a foot away, the biggest bully lifted his arm, ready to pummel the younger boy

- But then, as if it were an angel sent down to protect him, someone landed right in between the bullies and Chan

- Chan was honestly confused as to where this boy came from, but he pushed the feeling away and was just grateful

- There was a strange look on the boy’s face, Chan observed

- The boy was facing the left, staring straight at the building in front of him with confusion before looking back down at the strange bracelet on his hand that was shaking

- The bully’s fist connected with the strange boy’s arm and immediately he yelled out and retracted the hand as if he was just burned

- The strange boy turned to look at him as if he just noticed the bullies for the first time

- “Oh! I’m-”

- “Let’s get out of here!” The biggest bully shouted, running away with the rest of the kids following after him

- Chan stared at the boy in shock, but he never turned around to face him

- The strange boy just shrugged and turned to the right and started to run in a speed that Chan didn’t know was possible

- For the next couple of days, word spread about how Chan was protected by the strange boy

- No one touched him

- Chan was relieved and he wanted to find the boy, just to talk to him and thank him

- However, Chan didn’t even know where to start

- So for the next week, he sat down by himself like he usually did, but this time, there was no fear that someone was about to take his food

- But one day, he was sitting alone in his usual spot when a group of older elementals that he had never seen before approached him

- “Get lost, kid. We’re going to sit here.”

- “But why do I have to go?”

- The older elemental scoffed. “Because we don’t want to sit with some brat. Now scram.”

- Chan knew better than to oppose anyone

- People had just stopped bullying him

- So, he picked up his tray and started to walk around the dining hall, looking for an empty place to sit

- When he finally approached the end of the elementals table, Chan saw him

- The strange boy

- He was sitting alone just like Chan had for the past couple of years

- Chan took a breath, suddenly feeling nervous about meeting his saviour

- “Hi, can I sit with you?”

- The strange boy snapped his head up and stared at Chan for an uncomfortably long time

- His expression was confused, so that’s when it dawned on Chan

- ‘He doesn’t know who I am’

- So quickly, he had to make up a reason as to why he needed to sit with the boy

- “The older elementals won’t let me sit near them.”

- The strange boy nodded and gestured to the empty seat in front of him with a piece of stale bread that he had been eating

- Chan’s body flooded with joy

- This strange boy was the first person to ever let him sit with them

- Trying to hide his excitement, Chan dug into the food

- He then looked back up at the strange boy when he managed to calm down a little

- “What’s your name? I’m Lee Chan.”

- Chan had a couple of memories from his life on the outside

- The elementals that took care of him had asked him what he remembered and made sure that he held onto it

- Something about ‘keeping him human’

- So Chan knew his surname

- The boy in front of him had a soft smile

- “My name is Hansol, but you can call me Vernon. It’s my middle name.”

- “Oh.”

- Chan started to think

- ‘If he can get called something other than his first name, then so can I. But what?’

- Chan smiled, a small memory from his life on the outside flashing in his mind

- “Well in that case, you can call me Dino.”

- Vernon let out a soft giggle, but Chan could tell that it wasn’t mocking like all of the bullies...it was kinder

- “Why Dino?”

- Chan brightened up

- He always loved his own thought process, but no one ever talked to him long enough for him to tell people about it

- “Because I’m an earth elemental, and the way I stomp around to manipulate the earth makes me feel like a dinosaur.”

- Vernon let out another giggle and this time, Chan joined in

- Chan talked on and on and Vernon listened with great interest, chiming in every now and then

- And that’s how their dynamic was everyday

- Chan would talk and Vernon would listen

- The few days that Vernon did feel like talking, Chan made sure to pay extra attention, just so his new friend felt comfortable with him and didn’t leave

- So Chan finally had a new friend

- But unfortunately for him, the bullies picked up on the fact that Vernon was harmless

- So they started to pick on Chan again

- But Chan would never admit it

- He just brushed off the bruises and cuts as beatings from the soldiers

- One day, Chan and Vernon were sitting at their spot at the bench as per usual

- Chan was talking about his day, making sure to leave out the part where he was shoved to the floor by bullies of course, when someone took a seat next to Vernon

- Chan stopped mid-sentence, looking at the taller boy who had a bright smile on his face

- He offered a hand to Vernon, and Chan immediately felt a jolt of jealousy

- Vernon was his friend, why couldn’t he find another one?

- “I never properly introduced myself. My name is Mingyu.”

- Chan’s heart dropped a little when Vernon took Mingyu’s hand and shook it

- Suddenly, the feeling of being left behindthat was once a memory came flooding back to him

- Mingyu then turned to Chan with the same bright smile and offered him a hand

- “What’s your name?”

- Chan raised an eyebrow at the hand and hesitantly took it

- “Dino.”

- “That’s so cool! Did you know that some dinosaur tails were over 45 feet long? That’s like at least five of me!”

- Chan forced a smile on his face

- The only connection he had with the outside was his small knowledge of dinosaurs

- He didn’t even know where he knew it from, but he did

- “Yes. I did.”

- Eventually, Mingyu just became a part of his life whether he wanted him to or not

- Chan remained civil with Mingyu because he didn’t seem like he was trying to take Vernon away, but he could never be too cautious

- There were times where Mingyu wasn’t around

- Sometimes he had gotten in trouble again for being so clumsy

- Other times he was somewhere else in the dining hall, being the social butterfly Chan wished he was

- The fact that Mingyu was effortlessly able to make friends just made Chan like him less

- But still, when Mingyu was away, the atmosphere felt weird

- It was like there was something missing from them

- But Chan just ignored the feeling

- He didn’t like Mingyu and he was pretty sure that nothing he did would ever make Chan like him

- Especially now as Mingyu stood before the two with his hands on another boy’s shoulders

- Another boy just meant it was more likely that they would take his friend away

- And taking his friend away meant that he didn’t have safe place to go to after the soldiers beat him or when the bullies messed with him

- “Hey guys! This is my new friend, Junhui. He just got transferred into here from Facility C!”

- Chan glared holes into the side of Mingyu’s head, but the tall boy didn’t notice

- “It’s nice to meet you. I’m Vernon, that’s Dino.”

- Chan whipped his head over to his friend and saw Vernon smiling at the new boy, bringing a pout to Chan’s lips

- The new boy didn’t quite seem to notice, instead taking a seat next to Chan while Mingyu took one next to Vernon

- “You can call me Jun.”

- Chan’s anger towards Jun immediately started to fade away once the boy started to talk

- Jun was probably one of the funniest people Chan had ever met

- There was just something about the way that Jun told a story that just hooked Chan on

- So, maybe Jun wasn’t so bad

- But Chan was still and would probably be forever cautious of Mingyu

- As time went by, the group only grew

- First it was Jun’s friend, The8

- Chan didn’t know much about him, just that he stayed in the same cell as him

- He had never talked to the boy until Jun introduced him to everyone, but he knew that The8 was one of the scariest elementals in the facility

- Chan didn’t really think that The8 liked him, but then he started to notice how Chan’s bullies started to stay away

- So maybe The8 wasn’t that bad

- And then Mingyu’s friend, Wonwoo came along

- Wonwoo wasn’t an elemental, so Chan was all the more suspicious of him

- Why would a healer want to be friends with a group of elementals?

- But over time, Chan learned to get along with Wonwoo

- He was still being too stubborn to get along with Mingyu

- Everything was routine for a while

- Chan would wake up, go to work, meet up with his friends at meal time, go back to work, and back to the cells

- Sure there were some instances where one of them (including Chan) got in trouble, but other than that it was normal for Chan

- But one night, Chan was woken up by a blaring alarm

- Immediately, he went to find The8

- These kinds of things never happened before, but that just made it all the more scary

- But of course, Chan would never admit that he was scared

- “The8!” Chan called once he saw his friend

- “Hey, stick by me, it’s alright,” The8 replied, wrapping a protective arm around Chan, who didn’t make any move to push it off

- “Everyone out!” The soldiers bellowed

- If The8 noticed the way Chan flinched, he didn’t say anything. And Chan was grateful for that

- When they were outside, Chan looked around and saw the affected from other cells piling out as well

- But among them, there was a thick cloud of smoke that came from a tree that was lit on fire

- Chan whipped his head to look at The8, but The8 was staring at the tree in horror

- But Chan didn’t exactly know why

- The soldiers started shouting for the affected to stay in groups according to their cells

- The specific soldiers for each cell herded them together and publicly beat the ones they didn’t recognize, even if they were in the right place

- “’F’ Raindrops! Gather around here!”

- Chan turned to look at The8

- The8 grabbed Chan by the shoulders and looked him in the eyes with concern

- “Stay right here, got it? I’ll be back soon.”

- Chan nodded silently with a lump in his throat

- With the soldiers, he wasn’t sure if that would be true

- Chan kept his eyes on the tree as the water elementals started to put it out

- “Looks like someone’s a scaredy cat,” A heckling voice called from behind Chan

- Chan ignored the bullies, knowing they wouldn’t do anything because of their fear of The8

- So he kept his gaze up at the tree

- “Dino”

- Chan’s gaze snapped down and he saw Vernon jogging towards him

- “What’s everyone doing out?”

- Chan furrowed his eyebrows together

- Did he not get called out?

- “The soldiers wanted to keep us all in one place while they questioned the fire elementals I think.”

- “Why? They won’t care if we burn.”

- Chan shrugged, “I think it’s because if we all die they can’t test on us or something.”

- Once the elementals were sent back to their cells, it was near morning

- So there really was no point in going back to sleep

- Instead, Chan paced the room as he waited for The8 to return

- If he returned

- And much to Chan’s relief, he did

- “What happened? Are you okay?”

- The8 chuckled softly and ruffled Chan’s hair

- “Yeah, I’m fine. They just interrogated me in front of a senser to see if I was the one that set the tree on fire.”

- “Do you think it was an elemental?”

- The8 looked off to the side

- “I don’t think so.”

- The facility was on complete lockdown for the next couple of months

- So that meant they weren’t allowed to leave their cells for anything

- Not even meal time

- Chan didn’t know why until he listened in on the soldiers’ conversations one day

- “...seventeen or something like that.”

- “So has anyone found them yet?”

- “No not yet. We keep getting close but right when we think we got them, they’re gone.”

- “How many have they gotten out?”

- “I think it was the three of them, four more stars, and two clouds.”

- “Clouds? How did they get the clouds out from isolation?”

- “No clue. These affected are getting smarter and smarter.”

- Chan immediately rushed over to where The8 was laying and told him everything

- The8 didn’t seem to believe him, but he let Chan talk about it whenever he heard new information

- Eventually, when lockdown was over but security was heavier than ever and it just seemed to be getting worse

- Wonwoo wasn’t allowed to sit with them anymore, so it was just the five elementals

- And Chan chattered excitedly about the group of escapees called ‘seventeen’

- It had become the main topic for the affected for a while

- Vernon and The8 didn’t believe it, but Mingyu and Jun did

- But that didn’t stop Chan from talking about it

- One day, Chan met up with the other elementals as he usually did

- Jun, The8, and Vernon were there, but Wonwoo and Mingyu weren’t

- It wasn’t rare for one of the elementals to be missing, but for Wonwoo it was just strange

- As Chan sat down and ate his food, Mingyu came sprinting towards them

- “Guys! Wonwoo was...I just...I saw...”

- “Words, Gyu, words!”

- “Wonwoo escaped. He’s gone.”

- “What do you mean gone?”

- Mingyu sat down in his seat next to Vernon, looking at the rest of the group with wide eyes

- “As in he ran off with these...these bandits or something! And I could have sworn I saw the sun. You know, the one that watched over us every now and then? The scary one?”

- Chan smiled

- So it was true after all

- And someone he knew, someone he was friends with, managed to get out

- Chan was beaming with pride

- Even if it wasn’t him that had escaped, he was happy that his friend was able to experience the freedom he would never get

- A week passed and everything was as normal as it could be

- Chan was just talking to his friends about something that happened during work when the doors slammed open with a loud bang

- Two shoulders stormed in with rifles in hand, pointing them around the room and shouting at everyone to get down

- It wasn’t like soldiers never carried around rifles, but it was just unsettling that two of them would run in with them

- As everyone sank to the floor, Chan followed the suit, trying not to show his fear

- Mingyu put a hand on Chan’s back, but that only made him spiteful rather than comforted

- There was a ear shattering scream that made Chan flinch, only for Mingyu to hold him tighter

- But Chan just ignored the boy, digging his face into the floor

- “Vernon”

- Chan stiffened up, cursing whoever had just called for his friend

- Who would talk at a time like this?

- “Vernon it’s me!”

- Chan looked up once he realized that the voice was coming from above them

- There was a boy standing on top of the benches, looking down at Vernon

- “Seungkwan?” Vernon asked, having Chan whip his head to him

- Vernon did mention making a friend before

- “Get up, we’re busting you and your friends out of here.”

- At the news, Chan scrambled to his feet followed by the rest of their group

- “They’re coming!” One of the soldiers at the door shouted at the boy, Seungkwan

- “Okay, we gotta go, like, now.”

- Seungkwan turned and started running on the bench so none of the affected on the floor would get in his way

- Vernon jumped on the bench and followed after him

- Chan started to climb onto the bench and Mingyu started to help him onto it

- There was a small part of Chan that got annoyed with Mingyu, but he just pushed the feeling down and focused on getting out

- When the group got to the door, they were immediately met with a large army of soldiers running towards them

- “Cover your ears!” Seungkwan shouted and Chan immediately brought his hands to the side of his head

- Chan watched as a strange kind of ripple in the air shot at the soldiers, having them pause in their step, bring their hands to their ears for a moment, and keep running

- “I don’t get it, that was supposed to mess with their earpieces!” Seungkwan exclaimed

- With a small sense of urgency, Chan pushed past Seungkwan.

- Getting into a stance with his feet shoulder width apart and knees bent, Chan stomped one foot on the floor like he had done many times before and felt around for the exact spot in the earth that he wanted to move

- He lifted his arm up and saw a large block from the floor follow

- Then, he pushed his hands out, having the block slide towards the middle of the crowd of soldiers and push them back

- When Chan was satisfied with the clearing of soldiers, Vernon stepped up next to him

- Chan watched as Vernon took a deep breath before pushing his hands towards the soldiers

- The sides of his head started to glow an icy blue, almost white

- Though Chan couldn’t see anything different in the air, he heard the whistling of wind and saw the soldiers flying backwards

- “Come on!” Seungkwan shouted before running to the soldiers towards the gate

- As they ran through the crowd of soldiers, Chan watched from behind as The8′s body started to glow as used his fire manipulation to keep the soldiers back

- When the group was out of the crowd, they started to run as fast as they can

- But for Chan, that wasn’t very fast

- He knew that he had to keep going as they wove through the facility, but he was an earth elemental...something about them were just kind of slow

- Chan was starting to fall behind as they approached the closed gates

- Seungkwan and Vernon were far ahead with Jun and The8 close behind

- Chan was a good three feet away from the rest of the group and he couldn’t seem to close the gap

- Mingyu was next to him, but Chan knew deep down that Mingyu could go faster than he was going at the moment

- “I’m not going to make it...I’m not going to make it,” Chan muttered to himself as he glanced over his shoulder to see the soldiers less than a foot behind him, reaching out to grab his arm

- Before he could say anything, Mingyu grabbed his wrist and roughly yanked him forward

- Chan felt two hands on his back pushing him forward, making him stumble into step with The8 and Jun

- “Mingyu! No!” Chan cried as he looked back to see the soldiers pulling Mingyu towards them, pushing him to the floor and surrounding him

- “What happened?” Vernon demanded, having Chan turn his head back to the front

- “He pushed me forward!”

- “We’ll come back for him!” Seungkwan shouted breathlessly

- Chan sent another glance back, heart dropping when he saw Mingyu’s limp body getting dragged away

- His mind was so clouded with guilt that he barely registered the floor rumbling from under him

- He only came back to reality when a large branch started to reach down from the top of the wall

- “Wonwoo!” Vernon exclaimed, having Chan look up and smile at the familiar face

- “Hurry! They’re right behind you!”

- Vernon ran to the back of the crowd helping everyone onto the branch

- The small gesture made Chan’s heart hurt since Mingyu had done the same thing when he helped everyone onto the branch

- Chan had been too stubborn to realize that Mingyu was actually a good friend

- But now it was too late

- “Vernon get on!” Seungkwan shouted, snapping Chan out of his pity party to see the branch rising until it horizontal

- “He can jump,” Jun informed Seungkwan

- The group on the branch started to walk onto the wall

- Wonwoo’s hands were glowing green as he brought the branch back down to the other side of the wall, burying it back in the ground

- There were a couple more people that Chan didn’t recognize, but from the way they weren’t trying to attack them, Chan knew they were on their side

- Wonwoo started to look at the group with wide eyes, his posture growing more and more frantic

- Chan knew exactly what Wonwoo was going to ask, and he felt horrible for it

- “Where’s Mingyu?”

- Chan knew that Wonwoo and Mingyu were close, closer than Mingyu was with anyone else in the group

- It felt like he was telling a loved one about their dead relative

- But after all, it was like that wasn’t it? Getting caught only meant the worst...

- “I was... I was falling behind so he...he grabbed my arm and pulled me forward so that the soldiers would get him instead of me.”

- Chan looked down in shame

- He knew that it wasn’t his fault that Mingyu sacrificed himself, but it was his fault that he didn’t let Mingyu know how much of a good friend he was

- “What?” Wonwoo ran past Chan, but he couldn’t bring himself to look up

- Chan heard Wonwoo shout desperately, begging to go back for him

- The fact that Wonwoo was never the type to show emotion broke him

- “We have to go now” One of the unfamiliar boys said, ushering Chan towards the edge of the wall where another boy dropped a rope and tied it to a bar

- “Come on, Dino. You first,” Jun said, helping Chan climb over the bars and grab onto the rope

- Once everyone was on the floor, they ran again

- Chan couldn’t shake his thoughts away from Mingyu

- The guilt only got worse as they arrived at some sort of hidden campsite

- Mingyu would have loved this...

- “Welcome to our camp,” One of the rescuers said as he pulled on a glove. “My name is S. Coups and I’m the leader of our clan, ‘Seventeen.’”

- “Hey,” Jun said in a low tone as he walked up to stand next to Chan

- Chan didn’t look up. He didn’t want to meet his eyes after what he did

- “What happened to Mingyu wasn’t your fault.”

- Despite his friend’s words, Chan couldn’t shake the feeling

- So, after S. Coups explained to them that they would be going on missions, Chan immediately went to the side of the camp to train

- Chan was going to make sure that no one was left behind again

25 notes · View notes

bigskydreaming · 4 years

Text

thehollowprince said: I am looking forward to seeing how this all unfolds, because its a great premise, though I don’t know if I would have attempted to juggle all the chimeras the way you are. Although, speaking of chimeras, where’s Theo? I have a hunch he’s the one “helping” Hayden’s sister, and I’m curious as to what happened to the other chimera? The big one with the Garuda talons? Belasko?

Belasko is long dead and gone in this, he was a willing accomplice/minion of the Dread Doctors and official in-story fate for him is that he thus eventually died from incompatibility with his ‘donor’ material the way several of the other chimeras did in canon and Hayden was going to without Scott giving her the bite. The reason the chimeras are all werewolves here is because as Corey briefly alluded to while he and Lucas were investigating the creepy Fae Murder-House, they WERE chimeras created/experimented on by the DD just like in the show.

And when Scott and his core pack of Malia, Aiden and Ethan plus the surviving members of Satomi’s pack who escaped Kali with them like Brett, Carrie and Lori, like....when pre-story, they tracked down the Doctors’ most recent lair in the hopes of finding Theo, who Scott, Malia, Aiden and Ethan hoped was still alive even though they believed he died in their original escape from the Doctors, they found the other chimeras and took them with them instead. Eventually, of course, some of them like Hayden started dying because of their chimera natures, and since the Scott of this AU has different issues with the bite and his werewolf nature because of how things went down here versus how they happened in canon.....one of the ripple effects of that is here he’s less opposed to offering the bite when it seems needed, and so he offered and they all accepted rather than risk the poisoning fate that they had no way of knowing whether or not it might happen to them all at some point or not.

The not in-story explanation for the lack of Belasko is I simply said, with feeling, “Oh FUCK no, that is NOT remotely what a garuda is, Davis you freaking hack, Garuda isn’t even something you can freaking pluralize since he’s a being not a supernatural species, and I already oh fucked no this with Hayden and your nagual shit and oh fucked no this with your wendigo and skinwalker shit and I just effin’ refuse to oh fuck no this again so y’know what, Belasko’s dead, he died, oh no, much sadness, no more ‘garuda’ chimeras. And what the fuck was even up with his plot vehicle of a power anyway, like why the fuck did you even decide that ‘garuda’ was the best and only match for ‘a supernatural being that takes other peoples’ powers.’ Like, we get it, you made the chimeras to be the X-Men story nobody was ever going to pay you to write, but Belasko’s no fucking Rogue, and know what? Now you did it, I just decided in fact he’s just dead. You only have yourself to blame. Shouldn’t have made him suck, then maybe somebody would give a shit.”

Ahem. Anyway. Yeah that’s the backstory for the lack of Belasko. In shorter news, Donovan also died offscreen simply because I was fucking sick to death of everything said about him and that stupid shoe-horned ‘schism’ resulting from his canon death so I just made the executive decision to just nope him out of existence and just Not with him instead.

The only other remaining chimera was Noah, the berserker chimera played by Jordan Fisher who as you know, I very much like and felt was wasted by the show, so he’s still very much around and kicking, as was briefly mentioned when they were talking about Hayden’s sister.. He accepted the bite the same as the rest of the chimeras, but he still had a home and family he felt missed him and was worth going back to, so he went home with Scott and the rest of the pack’s blessing and well-wishes. That was very much laid in there as a Chekhov’s gun of a plot point to pay off later. (Hayden of course misses her sister a great deal, but she suffers from some insecurities and doubts pre-existing from her and Val’s parents’ deaths that made her feel that going home would just mean danger would follow her there, much like the reason Scott left and stayed away from Beacon Hills. Whereas Noah doesn’t have similar reasons or Peter-related issues for feeling this way and mostly was just sure if his mother could hear him expressing such a sentiment, she’d ground the shit out of him for even thinking that was an acceptable explanation for staying away. He was always meant to show up eventually though).

ACTUAL SPOILER-Y SPOLERS I guess, if anybody is concerned on that front at this point, lmfao:

And yup, Theo is absolutely the ‘anonymous source’ behind Hayden’s sister suddenly deciding out of the blue that there was some clue to be found in New York. He did survive and has been playing a longterm game of his own all along, because I stan a villainous Theo who isn’t an inherently just evil or irredeemable character, but one who has believed himself to be the only one looking out for his best interests and used to doing so for long enough that he has as of now convinced himself he can explain or justify most any actions he takes for this reason, at least enough to satisfy his own conscience. I just find Theo incredibly more compelling as the teenage version of canon Peter to act as a foil to Scott, as opposed to the teenage version of fanon Peter to act as a victim to Scott, y’know, the way most everybody decided to view him as.

The spoiler-y part is that like Aiden and Ethan briefly mentioned to each other when they first showed up in Beacon Hills, Theo was one of the original DD captives in this universe, along with Scott, Malia, Aiden and Ethan - a werewolf being experimented alongside the other four by the Doctors, for their ‘unique’ traits. (Malia and Theo’s full-shift abilities, Aiden and Ethan’s ‘twin connection’ and Scott’s seemingly greater-than-average resistance to magic like mountain ash circles, with this of course actual being an indicator of his future status as a True Alpha. The one and only difference I made to Theo’s backstory here is that he’s actually a werewolf and not a chimera here. He was changed by a rogue Alpha’s bite at one point, much like he’d claimed originally on the show). Anyway, at one point, the Doctors’ experiments finally triggered Scott’s ascension to True Alpha by essentially pushing at his protective instincts in regards to the others.

But while this was something the Doctors were aiming for, having their own uses for a potential True Alpha’s power/nature, there was an unexpected side-effect they hadn’t planned for, given that there wasn’t much data for them to go off of when it came to True Alphas because of how rare they are (at least by the time the Dread Doctors came along, though that wasn’t always the case, as Alberich expressed to Lucas and Corey).

What they didn’t account for stems back to that long as fuck meta I wrote ages ago about how I view ‘the shape you take reflects the person you are’ in canon, and True Alphas. Basically, my take has always been you either are a True Alpha or you’re not. There’s no ‘level-up’ process, no ACTUAL ‘ascension.’ To me, TA just means like.....a werewolf who is ALWAYS more of a leader than ever a follower, since even other Alphas like Derek, Peter, and the Alpha Pack have demonstrated that at least before they were each alphas, they were all more than capable of and willing to exist as betas to another alpha, even if that alpha was just their direct predecessor and a born relative. Scott’s unique-ness within the Teen Wolf universe ultimately comes down to one thing and one thing only for me.....no matter how his personal views and morality evolved and changed over time, the one thing that was a constant was that no matter what, he was never willing to follow anyone he didn’t believe had a ‘right’ to lead him or command him, and he wasn’t swayed by the usual arguments of why a werewolf like him, a seeming beta, SHOULD view someone like Peter or Derek having the ‘right’ to command his allegiance.

Because even though he wasn’t technically an Alpha until 3A......Scott by Derek’s own admission was never really a beta or an omega. To be a beta, he would have had to ACTUALLY accept Peter or Derek’s ability or right to command his allegiance, which he never actually did, and he was never really an omega either, because as Derek said in S2, he realized the reason he had so much trouble convincing Scott to join him was he was already the alpha of his own pack. Since, like Scott’s later pack always included non-werewolves, there was never actually any reason why Allison and Stiles COULDN’T have been considered his pack all along.

The only reason IMO that Scott wasn’t a True Alpha from day one, is because he came into the werewolf world not having a clue what the ‘rules’ were, and from day one, every single person to fill him in on what the rules were, did so according to their traditional/more common views of how ‘things worked.’ He didn’t immediately reveal himself as a TA because he didn’t realize such a thing even existed, or it was even possible to be one, and so for a time it kinda existed....in flux, as it were. He wasn’t truly a beta or omega because neither was in his nature - he was very much a social creature, a pack entity more suited to being surrounded by others than a loner, but he was also not remotely someone willing to set aside his own views, beliefs or goals in order to follow someone else’s, even if the price for that unwillingness was being essentially outcast as far as both ‘normal werewolf society’ and normal human society viewed things. He simply reflected the IMAGE of being a beta or an omega, gold eyes and all, because as far as he knew, as far as he’d internalized as of that point, that was who he was supposed to be or all he COULD possibly be.

What changed this for him wasn’t just being made aware that True Alphas were a thing, albeit rare, like in 3A when Deaton first mentioned it. Because after all, the only REASON Deaton brought it up, was because Scott and others were ALREADY confused by the occasional flickers of alpha red they witnessed his eyes showing, like in the fight with Ennis, and technically, going all the way back to Night School in S1, where his eyes flickered red when he defied Peter’s efforts to mentally exert dominance over him and make him kill the others. Basically, just like when he matched Ennis blow for blow, even if just briefly, even though as the bigger, stronger, and more experienced and ALPHA werewolf Ennis should have swatted him aside like a fly, not just knocked him back a few feet......the flickers of Alpha red showed up just when Scott seemingly defied the ‘rules’ of werewolf nature and refused to give way to an Alpha’s dominance the way that most other betas and omegas typically were seen or believed to.

IMO its as simple as ‘at these times and others, Scott SHOWED that he was simply NOT a beta, he refused to follow any convictions MORE than his own, and he was consistently SHOWN to never truly be an omega, because how can someone be packless when someone has people already willing to follow HIM’.....and thus, he was a True Alpha all along, simply because Alpha was the only word left to describe him, even if he never inherited the ‘power’ from another Alpha or ‘stole it’ by killing one. The only thing that ever actually changed for him, was that he existed as a werewolf long enough and in enough defiance of ‘the way things worked’ that he just stopped ACCEPTING that beta and omega were the only two options that existed to define him, and he just for the first time fully internalized his own belief that he didn’t NEED others to define him, that it was enough that he just exist as he already was. His own self-image, self-WORTH, was all that he needed.

And that’s why the pivotal moment in which he ‘ascended’ to True Alpha once and for all, was basically when he was once again saying ‘fuck you’ to the ‘rules’ when he broke through Jennifer’s mountain ash circle, something he shouldn’t have been capable of. He was able to do it, and manifest fully as the True Alpha he’d been all along, because in that moment, he deliberately and with INTENT, like with full conscious awareness of what he was doing, that he was fully attempting to accomplish what everyone else claimed was impossible, he basically said “the rules don’t matter to me, the fact that everyone believes I SHOULDN’T be able to do this doesn’t matter to me, the only thing that matters to me is I’m going to do it whether anyone else believes I can or not. Only I and I alone get to decide who I am and what I’m capable of.”

THAT in my opinion is what True Alpha always meant, and its why Scott was the only one we saw on the show....because his narrative, deliberately from day one, was ALWAYS one of self-determination above all else.

So basically, the same logic and reasoning all applies to LC and his ‘ascension’ to True Alpha there....it was the same thing. He was one all along, but only became one when his conscious AND subconscious reflection of ‘the way things worked’ gave way to his stronger self-determination and refuses to just ACCEPT the way things work. And because here the Dread Doctors, like most everyone else in universe, like except for those like say, Alberich, because they just innately didn’t understand the real nature of True Alphas and what made someone one and WHY they’d become so rare (essentially, it became like a self-fulfilling prophecy - the more rare True Alphas became, the less of them there were because the less new and young werewolves believed let alone ACCEPTED that there was an alternative to following those they didn’t believe in, if they simply....refuted it enough via their own self-image).....but because the Doctors didn’t fully GET that Scott wasn’t just a potential True Alpha, but was already kinda a....True Alpha in-cocoon so to speak....they didn’t fully realize all the potential repercussions of them trying to PUSH him into manifesting as one the way they were.

And so the thing where it was mentioned that the twins, Scott and Malia all kinda ‘share’ each other’s unique traits now, with all of them able to full-shift, all of them sharing a lesser degree of the same psychic connection the twins do, and Scott’s seeming greater-than-average resistance to magic....that happened all on its own, the second Scott ‘fully’ became a True Alpha, and its the part the DD didn’t prepare for and didn’t understand. Because by not getting that Scott had already been an Alpha the whole time, they didn’t realize that these shapeshifters they’d been keeping in close proximity to one another, in shared predicaments, and clearly developing bonds because of it....like, just as Scott was already an Alpha by then, they were ALREADY a pack by then. They just didn’t know it, because well, a pack needs an alpha and they didn’t realize they already had one. So basically, they already HAD a pack bond, and thus when that combined with the Dread Doctors’ actual experiment and the kinda.....magical reaffirmation of Scott’s own self-image and alphahood rippled back through the suddenly VERY REAL and very CLEARLY real pack bond all at once, like it’d simply magically sprung into existence instead of just showing what had already been there in a different shape or form.....this all added together to kinda create this supernatural compounding effect. And thus, pretty much by accident, the Dread Doctors managed to completely unintentionally create a REAL throwback to the werewolf packs of old, like Alberich and the other Fae had ORIGINALLY ‘designed’ them to be.

Because just like the power of a werewolf comes from essentially being the supernatural embodiment of their strength of self, of their inner power, who and what they really are....(and why the shape an Alpha takes in the show varies so tremendously based on how the various Alphas viewed THEMSELVES and their own power)....

So too, is the power of a werewolf PACK the supernatural embodiment of the idea of the pack in full....the idea that the whole is GREATER than just the sum of its parts. Which is why the more werewolves get added to a pack, the more EACH individual pack member’s strength, healing, etc, increased as a whole. And thus here, that was true, but in addition, these various unique shapeshifters also ended up sharing the same traits that made each of them ON THEIR OWN fairly distinct....which actually is the way it was always intended to be, and once had been true of ancient packs.

(As of now, only the core pack of Scott, Malia, Aiden and Ethan share in this ‘level’ of their pack bond, but as for why that is, the answer is actually in the above explantion, lol).

So yeah, Scott manifested as a True Alpha, instant pack bond whammo, and reacting pretty much on instinct to the surprise this created for the DD, they escaped, largely by instinctively pulling on EACH OTHER’S individual gifts...because while the way the DD held them captive took into account their respective gifts, like say, Malia’s ability to full-shift, it DIDN’T take into account the possibility of all of them suddenly being able to full-shift without warning.

And then Scott, Malia, Aiden and Ethan escaped and spent the next several months wandering, stuck in their full-shfit shapes because they didn’t entirely yet understand what had happened or how, and so with that and the trauma they’d endured, it took them awhile to like....remember how to shift BACK, essentially.

At the time, the four of them all believed Theo had died in their escape attempt. But after they eventually got free of Kali and Julia, and had added the surviving members of Satomi’s old pack, they decided to try and track down the Dread Doctors in the hope that Theo was still alive....because now, with a better understanding of what had happened and what they were capable of, they were convinced they could still feel Theo through their initial pack bond.

Instead they found the chimeras and no sign of Theo, and with the urgency of at least getting these latest prisoners of the DD safe and sound, they kinda accepted that maybe they were wrong and it was just wishful thinking that they’d been so sure they could still feel Theo.

Or at least, Scott and Aiden did. Ethan and Malia, not quite.

You remember when Josh, Tracy, Lucas and Corey met with Malia in the park at night while Lucas and Corey told them about meeting Alberich and everything he’d said and hinted at, and the ‘offer’ he’d asked them to take to Scott? And how Malia firmly shut that shit down and all but ordered all of them not to say a word, because as she said, Scott absolutely would take Alberich’s deal without a second thought, to keep the rest of them safe, no matter what it meant for him? When they asked if that meant not telling the twins either, and Malia said yes because Ethan would agree but Aiden never would, and Lucas asked if this meant she and Ethan HAD ever before kept something from Scott and Aiden specifically and she said yes but refused to elaborate further.....this is what that was referencing.

Because when they went back for Theo and found the chimeras instead, Ethan and Malia ended up on their own at one point, and this is when they discovered that Theo had been a plant all along. Yes he was a werewolf in this AU, but he’d still ended up working for the Dread Doctors in exchange for getting away from the Alpha who’d turned him. They’d put him in with the others under the guise of him just being another experiment, in order to utilize him as a kind of control variable to nudge the others in ways and at times they expected them to be resistant to just going along with the Doctors’ latest experiment.

At the time, they didn’t find any proof that Theo was still alive after all, just this, so Malia and Ethan did still very much believe that he was dead at this point, same as Scott and Aiden now.....and so they felt that there was no point in telling them this and disillusioning them with Theo’s betrayal/complicity the way they felt betrayed by this information, and that it would just make things worse. They honestly felt they were protecting them by doing this, or at least Scott as he was the one they were concerned would take it the worst given how much responsibility he feels for everything and everyone.....but they also agreed not to tell Aiden as they didn’t think he’d agree to keep it from Scott. As Aiden in this AU is extremely ride or die from Scott and hates subterfuge as a general rule (but also, because hiding the info about Theo and this deal about Alberich is absolutely doomed to bite them in the ass, and Scott needed to have at least ONE of the inner circle who wasn’t hiding anything from him, specifically BECAUSE they knew he wouldn’t agree to it, just like Josh is of course, Very Not Happy about being asked to hide this stuff about Alberich and his offer).

So yeah, Theo of course did survive the original escape attempt and escaped himself and decided to stay that way and that he’d had enough of the Doctors’ ‘help’/employment.....

But also in no small part because he’d ended up getting hit by/included in the pack bond the same as the others when it manifested, and considering he was as clueless why as any of them at first, he had no doubt that if he stayed in the Doctors’ reach, they’d be quite keen to use him for all their experiments into why and what it meant regardless of his ‘allegiances.’

Ever since then, he’s kinda been on his own doing his own thing, and he had no plans to go after the others or do anything more to them at first, as this Theo DOES still have a conscience and while he believes in looking out for number one, it DID still at times ping while lying to the others.....but that kinda changed once he worked out for himself a little bit of what it meant that he still could ‘feel’ the others, as well as being more resistant to magic now than he’d been previously. Because to ACTUALLY partake in the pack bond that’d been created, that meant that at least some of the bond he’d ‘faked’ creating with the others actually HAD been real. It wouldn’t have been enough for just THEM to believe it’d been real, and him to benefit from getting their portion of things as a result, like he’d originally tried to convince himself. Because see, once he did track down the others and observe them from afar, just to test his own theories, he found out that just like him....Scott and the twins now could full-shift into coyotes, like Malia. That, after all, was what they’d all gotten from her.

But, they - and Malia - ALSO could full-shift into wolves. Just like him.

And that, they could have ONLY gotten from HIM. The others didn’t get just a full-shift ability from Malia....they got the ability to shift fully into BOTH their wolf selves, and a coyote version of themselves, due to how closely related wolves and coyotes are, and thus they just sort of manifest slightly different selves via that shared family connection. It probably wouldn’t have worked the same way if Malia had been like a were-bear shifter or something, but another canine, yeah. They don’t use the other shape much at all, because for Scott, Ethan, Aiden and Theo, the wolf is what FEELS most like ‘them,’ whereas the coyote feels like a comfortable, well-fitting disguise they can slip into from time to time, while for Malia its the same in reverse, but its still something they each have.

And thus while the others could make the assumption, given that they thought Theo was dead or dead and a fake the whole time, that both full-shifts came from Malia’s ability just combined with the wolf nature of the other three.....for Theo, there was no denying that the reality was that the wolf full-shifts came from him. From him - unknowingly or not - ACTUALLY offering it up through the pack bond....something that only could have happened as something he GAVE, not that they just TOOK. Something, that was proof that somehow, without realizing it, the bonds he’d formed during that initial time had actually become a lot more real than he’d convinced even himself.

And Theo does NOT care for that realization.

Because see, if ANY of that was real, on his end, that gave those pings of his conscience from way back then renewed life and intensity, and frankly, he doesn’t care too much for his conscience. Its loud and annoying and inconvenient, and he’d quite like it to go suck a dick when he’s being comfortably amoral and doing whatever he damn well feels like doing for no other reason than because he feels like it. But now the thing’s always peskily droning away in the background reminding him its there, and Theo unfortunately tends to make some of his worst decisions when he’s testily trying to prove to his conscience that you’re not the boss of me and bitch, I do what I want.

Plus there’s the fact that on top of this, the very idea of MUTUAL pack bonds gives Theo very icky feelings of things like...obligation, and concern, and other four letter words that he very much just does not fuck with, thanks ever so much. With the cherry on top of his “I Did Not Ask For This, Please Take It Back To The Kitchen But No Not The Added Powers Too, Those Can Stay, I Like Those” Pie being that, well.....like I said, the reason none of them or the Dread Doctors realized ahead of time that they were already a pack, is because a pack needs an Alpha.

Which in time, makes Theo realize, that if on some level, he’s actually and still actually PACK, in his own subconscious as much as theirs.....then this by extension means....on some level, he views and accepts Scott as his alpha.

Theo: OH HELLLLLLLLLL NO.

Which, to my mind, is why Theo was always the perfect foil for Scott. Scott is a True Alpha who THINKS he’s okay with following but in actuality is never truly comfortable allowing another’s will to supersede his own, and would rather be on his own than with someone he’s uncomfortable following. Theo is a lone wolf who THINKS he’s okay being one and would never follow anyone but himself, but in actuality, he’s never truly been comfortable alone and he’s willing to allow others’ will to supersede his own if they offer comfort that outweighs his discomfort with the idea.

So Theo’s around making moves in the background because he has his own agenda for Fixing This and making things more in line with how he’d like them. There’s definitely an end game for that but I wouldn’t say its total redemption-oriented as he has absolutely Fucked Stuff Up before this point and will continue to do so, and with gusto, because he’s kinda his own worst enemy, but neither is it outright vilifaction and death and/or total ostracization/exile-esque. Its more...Theo is very much still in flux, somewhat like Scott was between being bitten and ‘becoming’ a True Alpha, and nothing that doesn’t go smoothly is totally without consequences. Its just.....Theo’s complicated, and he’s going to remain so, but what that means exactly tends to change over time. But like, Malia is also complicated, and so are Ethan and Aiden, and so is Scott, and they are all very different versions of complicated, so.......basically all I’m saying is I don’t think I could ever write a Theo that’s fully a ‘Good Guy’ but as much as I detest show Theo, like the twins, its because he could have been written a lot differently and been a lot more compelling for it, all without ever being a ‘Good Guy’ and so I’m not actually all that interested in writing him as an out and out no holds barred villain either.

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small-reptile-cake · 5 years

Text

Vigilante AU (updated/fixed)

Concept:

We live in a world of injustice, where powerful people get to overshadow and overrule others basic human rights, and those with true power conceal themselves under the shadows at the risk of being killed or outcasted from society. However, in a city where hate and panic flood the streets, a select team of special people are willing to put themselves out there and defend those who can no longer fight for themselves. Virgil Sinclaire(18)

Powers:

Telepathy

Can read and invade the minds of other people with unsettling, fear inducing thoughts.

His range of hearing is of up to three blocks.

His powers caused him to be mildly agoraphobic; he spent a great part of his life hearing the sick thoughts of strangers on the street and the thousands of times he could simply tell when he was about to get mugged, making him afraid of leaving the safety of his apartment.

Now he wears headphones most of the time to muffle the voices.

Always lived in the same tall building, the higher he is the less he has to hear.

Born and raised in New York.

Studies/Interests:

Highschool dropout. In between his phobia and the terrible influence from his peers, he decided the education system wasn't for him.

Wanted to be an english major.

Enjoys writing scary/realistic novels.

Affiliations

Lives with his aunt and cousin.

Was lured into a group of thieves disguised as anarchists/protesters who claimed to fight for “True justice”, and that they would protect him. Truly, they were just hiding their true intentions and using Virgil’s powers to cause harm out of pure self gratification.

When their motives were unveiled, he still rejected becoming a part of the Alliance

Now, he belongs to his own neutral alignment in which he will not condone giving aid to those who he feels don't deserve it and will absolutely turn to revenge if necessary, even through unconventional means.

Is still willing to help the Alliance, or the “Light Ones” as he calls them.

Patton Kane (22)

Powers:

Healing

His healing can range from treating people (whether it be physically or emotionally) to fixing broken objects (Only if they’re visibly torn, like a broken key or a broken cup).

The risk of healing people’s emotions is that it’s only temporary, and Patton will absorb both positive and negative emotions from the individual.

He can’t fix something that’s been set on fire (A book or clothes) because it’s simply beyond his reach to reconstruct something that's been turned to dust.

Studies/Interests:

A gastronomy student.

Often attends to baking courses/seminars during the week.

Teaches kids with disabilities how to bake on the weekends.

Part of his tuition was paid by working as a babysitter and a store clerk. The rest was obtained from his parents

Was an animal hoarder back in college even though he didn’t have the space or time at the moment. There were stray cats, dogs, even a rat that lived in the same building and got caught in a trap one day. He healed it and brought it home because he didn’t want the owner to find it and kill it.

His family had to talk him out of it and he even went to therapy to deal with the guilt of having to give his babies up for adoption.

Now he only adopts people as his children.

Affiliations

Virgil activates his fatherly senses the most and constantly getting invited to eat at Patton’s

He’s always encouraging the vigilante to go out, then ultimately visiting whenever Virgil just doesn’t feel safe enough to go out.

He also loves playing video games together as long as they aren’t horror themed.

Went to highschool with Logan, he was a few years older but since their parents knew each other and Logan didn’t bother socializing with people in his grade, they became close.

They would both occasionally help their peers though small gestures, such as easing someone before a test, or getting someone out of a fever. It was when they met Roman that he dragged them onto greater things and eventually led to forming the alliance.

Logan Altman (20)

Powers:

Super speed

Is ironically always worried about wasting time

The best thing about his power is having more time to appreciate each moment and scene as it happens before his eyes, analyze it, then carry on.

Will stutter whenever he tries to speak at a normal pace. Roman had to help him practice his speech so it wouldn’t give away his identity during superhero duty.

Needs extra calories, and therefore is often found snacking on protein bars, fruit (and obviously Patton’s famous oatmeal-chocolate cookies)

Can be very hot headed and impatient at times.

Studies/Interests

Majors in chemical engineering, takes up astronomy in his spare time, as well as philosophy and english.

Wants to learn german and spanish.

Uses his super speed to be able to take all of his classes during the week, complete his chores in time and always have some spare minutes.

Keeps a schedule that he’s very loyal to or else he might take up more than he can handle and stress himself out (Again).

Despite being so diligent of his work, he always falls asleep in time, makes sure to have a healthy diet and gives himself some time to relax and contemplate.

Affiliations

Has been friends with Patton since elementary, their parents know each other. Their relationship was very stiff at first as the sensitive hero used to infuriate him by taking too long to do things and getting carried away all the time. This led to some outbursts that were always forgiven as long as Logan apologized afterwards.

One day he went too far while Patton was particularly sensitive, causing him to cry. He’s learnt to control himself since then.

He and Roman were classmates in fight grade when Roman moved in, by then he wasn’t friends with anybody else from his generation.

They started to hang out after a few very intense debates regarding the historical accuracy of a few medieval TV shows, and if it was acceptable to deviate from the obscure reality of those times.

Genuinely loves watching Roman perform classics on stage. The first time he saw him was during english class when they were to bring presentations to class, he performed a paragraph from one of Chèjov's tales.

Despite often treating him like an idiot, he recognizes Roman to be brilliant in his own field. And having him in class was always an amusing experience.

Thinks of Virgil’s occasional presence as comforting, but ultimately disagrees with his views on society.

Is constantly trying to convince Virgil to retake his studies, expressing concern for his future.

Roman Garcia(20)

Powers:

Morphing objects as he touches them

He can only change the shape of an object, not the material it’s made of (if he touches a metal chair and shapes it into a sword, it’ll still be made of metal)

It used to be very difficult for him to create things as he couldn’t focus hard enough on a single shape at the time and the images in his brain would get jumbled.

Later on he was diagnosed with ADHD. His family refused to medicate him and for many years he was forced to deal with it without knowing what it was and what to do about it. That, until he met a teacher that dealt with the same thing who was willing to educate him on he matter. From then on, he’s been learning to surpass it and perfect his technique.

Studies/Interests:

Drama school, also forms part of a few independent acting groups dedicated to performing musicals in small theatres.

Writes fantasy novels, as well as scripts for both theatre and film. He loves how different both formats are and the different things he can achieve with both

Can also write and listen in spanish, but is pronunciation is still too stiff to talk back.

Affiiliations:

Went to highschool with Logan, Patton was their senior.

Moved in to New York from Albuquerque with his little brother. Their entire family is from Venezuela.

Comes from divorced parents, had an abusive father growing up.

Doesn’t necessarily hate his brother, but is extremely weary of him growing into a villain since his powers are rarely ever used for anything other than chaos.

Has a strong attachment to Patton due to the hero’s overbearing, fatherly attitude. Often rings him up at random times to just hang out and watch “Brooklyn 99″ together or learn new recipes. Whether they are in a bad mood or not, it’s always heartwarming to spend time with each other. He really hated Virgil at first for stealing Patton’s attention.

Is currently really fond of Virgil as he can understand the struggles of being forced to move apart from your family. He also really appreciates the vigilante’s willingness to listen

Devin C. Pierce (20)

Powers:

Shapeshifting

Uses his powers to his own advantage and to help those he cares about.

Doesn’t care about fighting evil or turning evil because good and bad are constructs and totally subjective.

Studies/Interests

Drama school

Takes up law as his second major, mostly influenced by watching fake trials on TV and watching legal dramas.

Totally didn’t show Remus “How to get away with murder”.

Affiliations

Met Roman on an improv night at a bar, they got a few good laughs by being absurd and original.

Roman doesnt know about his powers but they're still good friends. Is often asked to babysit Remus when Roman is out fighting crime.

Is constantly teasing Virgil because, in Devin’s words; he’s a “Hypocrite who thinks of himself morally superior to everyone”

Tells everyone the C in his name is for classy.

Remus Garcia (14)

Power:

Morphing objects as he touches them

His creations are always a lot more gruesome than Roman’s

They range from weapons, dick shaped statues, inedible food shaped objects to prank people and tiny versions of torture devices he saw in some horror game about the dark ages. They all decorate his room

Studies/Interests:

He also sculpts manually and enjoys painting. Most of his art is abstract. Only draws explicitly gorey scenes when he’s angry.

He learnt French in secret for years just to one day start pretending he didn’t know spanish anymore and piss everyone off.

Enjoys reading horror stories on the internet a lot. He even found Virgil’s blog while deep diving once, but he doesn’t know that.

Affiliations

Moved in with Roman because his parents were busy with work and couldn’t tend to his “needs” all the time

Constantly trying to get Roman to take him on his missions. Since Roman doesn't trust him not to kill anyone, it never happened.

Is old enough not to need a babysitter, is chaotic enough to need one and only Deceit can handle him.

Patton is greatly unsettled by him, but Remus loves when he comes over to cook for them. He tried to show him his sculptures once when he was younger and it didn’t go well at all.

He is constantly trolling Virgil whenever they’re around, thinking about disturbing things the moment he walks through the door.

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7-wonders · 5 years

Text

As Above, So Below Ch. 13

Summary: Your average, mundane life as a college student is flipped upside down when the man you thought you knew as your next-door neighbor turns out to be the God of the dead. When Michael lures you down to Hell, everything that you thought you knew about the world is proven wrong.

Word Count: 3666

A/N: This chapter’s a lot happier than the last one! I’m also extremely pleased with how this one turned out. Feedback is always appreciated; leave me a like, reblog or comment if you liked it! My inbox is always open if you want to chat.

Out of all of the bad things that come along with almost dying, the sudden ‘caring’ attitudes of family and friends you hardly know is one of the worst. Since your release from the hospital a couple of days ago, you’ve been inundated with texts and calls from people who you didn’t even know had your phone number. Classmates who haven’t talked to you since the day you graduated high school flood your social media, all saying how “you’re the sweetest person I know” and that “I know we haven’t talked much recently, but…” It’s sickening, how people flock to tragedies just so they can say they’re connected.

However, being on the brink of death does bring visits from your favorite family members whom you haven’t been able to see for extended periods of time, due to one reason or another. There truly is nothing like being critically ill to bring a family back together. Today, you’re lucky to have one of your favorite family members stopping by for a long-overdue visit.

John Henry Moore, your mother’s cousin and one of your most beloved ‘uncles,’ is one of the so-called outcasts of your family. He’s constantly gone on shady business, teaches at a boys’ boarding school in the middle of a desert in California, and supposedly dabbles in the dark occult. He’s elegant, well-spoken, and totally weird; you love him dearly.

“You’re looking well, darling niece.” John Henry says, swinging the porch swing you’re both sitting on. A rare rainstorm has been drenching the city all day, leaving the sky gloomy and the the air smelling sweet.

“You don’t need to lie to me, Uncle John.” You smirk, knowing that you’re as pale as a ghost and still pretty weak.

“I promise you I’m not. Considering you almost died, the mere fact that you’re alive and smiling is incredibly good to see.” John Henry chuckles when a sudden clap of thunder has you jumping slightly, settling his hand on top of yours. “Something troubles you, (Y/N). What is it?”

You look at him in surprise, his intuition just as strong as you’ve always known it to be.

“You’ll think I’m crazy if I tell you.” You say finally, looking him in the eyes. John Henry smiles slightly, raising an eyebrow as if to challenge you.

“Try me.”

“Uncle, do you believe in witches and warlocks? Magic?” He doesn’t look shocked, or incredulous. Instead he grins, turning to face you.

“It appears there’s something I need to tell you, as well.”

From here you tell him the entire story. Your meeting with Michael, how he lured you down to a Hellmouth and brought you to the Underworld. The prophecy about you that had been written thousands of years ago. Learning magic and accepting your fate, as well as your relationship with Michael and the second prophecy that almost got him killed. In return, John Henry tells you his own dirty little secret. He’s a powerful warlock who teaches at a school for warlocks and serves on a secret council that oversees all of the witches and warlocks in the world.

“So you’ve met Hecate, then?” John Henry asks, lips twitching.

“I have. She’s...my friend.”

“A lot to handle, isn’t she?”

“You’ve met her, too?” Your eyes twinkle at knowing that other people have had the joy of meeting Madison.

“Hecate is the mother of magic and witchcraft. As a member of the council, I am in frequent contact with her.” He stands, crossing over to the railing and leaning against it as he looks out at the Murder House. “So, you’re supposed to be the Queen of the Underworld?”

“Apparently.” You smile sheepishly. “I didn’t believe it at first, either, but it’s true. I’ve seen how it works.”

“But a second prophecy makes it impossible for mortals to survive in the Underworld.”

“Even though I’m supposed to rule the Underworld, I also can’t survive there as a mortal. I’ll die down there, but if I’m not down there Satan will use Michael to blur the lines between the living and the dead and start the Apocalypse.”

“Well, it appears you’re facing a true catch-twenty two.” He says dryly, lighting a cigarette with his pyrokinesis.

“Not even Madi-Hecate has been able to find a loophole around these two prophecies. I’m a mortal, and I’ll forever be a mortal. Unless you can find a stray vampire that would be willing to change me?” You joke, attempting to use humor as a coping mechanism.

“No, no nice vampires at least.” John Henry takes a couple of deep drags from his cigarette, holding the smoke in his lungs for as long as possible before releasing it. It’s a very Madison-esque move, and it’s one that has your heart clenching painfully for your second home. “Let me ask you something, (Y/N). Obviously, your reasoning behind wanting to return to the the Underworld lies in the fact that you do not want to inadvertently trigger the Apocalypse, which I understand and am fully behind. But, is there a small part of you that has an ulterior motive?”

“An ulterior motive?” You question, watching as a conspiratorial smile spreads on his face.

“Do you...do you love Hades?”

“I don’t think so?” You say hesitantly. “I like Michael a lot, and I like him romantically, but we had only just started expressing our affection for each other a few days before I got sick.”

John Henry nods half-heartedly, and you can tell he’s thinking. What about, though, you’re not quite sure. Everytime you want to interrupt and ask what’s on his mind, his facial expressions change completely. It’s almost like he’s having a conversation with himself, and it makes him look like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.

“I think that I might have an idea.” He says suddenly, causing you to shoot up (well, shoot up as quickly as a person still recovering from sepsis can) off of the swing.

“Really?”

“I need to gather some supplies, but I should be back within a half hour. I’ll meet you back here.” With that he disappears dramatically, off to go and get the aforementioned supplies.

Your uncle is a man of his word, and 35 minutes you’re sitting on the bottom step in the basement of the Murder House while John Henry sets up the supplies he had left to grab.

“So you’re making an altar?” You ask, taking in the different colored cloths that sit on the small table.

“Hecate is very particular when it comes to being summoned. She requires a lot, which really isn’t that surprising. Three cloths: black for the Underworld, red for the middle world, and white for the upper world.” With each color, he picks up the corresponding cloth and spreads it out, placing items on top of each one. “Animal bones go on the black, wine on the red, and a plant on the white.”

“Something dead, something stagnant, and something growing?” You guess. John Henry looks over his shoulder, smiling at you.

“Very good. The three stages of life.”

The candles he’s set up around the altar all light up suddenly when he snaps his fingers, and he holds his hands out with his palms facing the ground. He starts chanting, switching easily between Latin and English whenever the incantation calls for it. When the wind from the Hellmouth reaches the main part of the basement and blows the candles out, the chanting only increases. You hum happily upon smelling the familiar scents of lavender, smoke, and dirt, nose seeing Madison before your eyes do.

“Well, well, well, it’s been an awfully long time since I had a warlock summon me.” Madison’s standing before John Henry, sunglasses perched on her head and black lace dress rustling in the wind. “Why does it not surprise me that the only tolerable warlock I’ve met in ages is associated with you, (Y/N)?”

You stand up, but choose not to pull your friend into a hug when she’s here on official business. John Henry’s head is bowed in respect as Madison relights the candles, an apparent sign for him to look back up.

“John Henry Moore is my uncle.” You explain, smiling when she smirks.

“Hecate, I thank you for choosing to receive my offerings.” He speaks up, causing you both to look at him.

“Why have you summoned me here today?” She asks.

“I think I may have a way for (Y/N) to return to the Underworld without being harmed anymore, at least long enough for Satan to be defeated.”

“How?” Madison’s intrigued, and you are too.

“The Seven Wonders. If (Y/N) truly does possess both light and night magic, then it should be a given that she’ll pass the Seven Wonders. You’ll still be mortal, but there will be a part of you that is the Supreme. You’ll be able to stay in the Underworld for a longer amount of time before the effects start to reach your mortal being, and thus, you’ll be able to defeat Satan.” Madison looks surprised at this suggestion, but you bite your lip in worry.

“Uncle, are you sure I’m strong enough? I can barely walk without getting winded, and not to mention that I couldn’t do any sort of magic when I attempted it in the hospital.”

“You were on so many drugs in the hospital, it doesn’t surprise me that your magic was repressed. The more Wonders you complete, the more vitality you experience. Think of it as levelling up. Each time you are successful, you’re healed in some way. The Supreme is meant to be the picture of a strong witch, and your magic won’t allow you to be so ill.” You’re more than shocked when Madison defends John Henry’s’ suggestion.

“What happens if I fail?”

“You won’t. I know you won’t.” Madison and John Henry both stare at you as you consider what you’re about to do.

Six of the Seven Wonders don’t scare you at all; if you fail, everyone will just find a different way to stop the Apocalypse. If you fail at descensum, however, that’s it. Game over. You’ve seen the consequences of failing that wonder, and it terrifies you to think about what being stuck in your personal hell for all eternity would be like. But if you do pass, like Madison believes you will, it would mean gaining immense amounts of power that would help you to defeat Satan and stop the end of the world before it even starts. Not only that, but you would be guaranteed to at least see Michael one more time in your life.

“I’ll do it.” You say finally, nodding your head decisively.

“We shall conduct your tests at the Hawthorne School, where I teach. We’re more prepared with magical supplies there than the basement that sits over a Hellmouth.” John Henry notes, wrinkling his nose in distaste. He holds out his arm for you to take, but Madison grabs you before you can even begin to reach for your uncle.

“We’ll meet you there, thanks.” She snaps. You nod, letting him know that you’ll be more than okay with Madison. Although he’s obviously displeased, John Henry still bows towards Madison before transmuting away. “Thank the gods, I thought he’d never leave.”

“Why don’t you like warlocks?” You ask with a smirk.

“Never have. The majority of them are misogynistic assholes who believe witches are below them, even though a goddess herself gifted them their powers.” She snorts, rolling her eyes. “Biggest mistake I ever made.”

“Let’s go, before my uncle comes back and you hex him or something.” You grab Madison’s hand, feeling the familiar tugging sensation that comes with transmuting.

When you both land, you’re standing in the library of the underground school that you’ve only ever seen pictures of before. Madison walks like she owns the place (which she does, if you’re getting technical), and you’re relieved that there’s no other warlocks around to annoy her. You stand still, cracking your knuckles nervously. You don’t know why you’re so nervous; everybody that’s closest to you has absolute faith in you and your magical abilities. But you don’t have that same faith in yourself. John Henry can sense your obvious nerves, and approaches you before taking your hands.

“My dear, darling niece, there is nothing to be frightened of. The magic that you possess...it’s not once-in-a-lifetime, it’s one of a kind. I was willfully ignorant, in that I chose to ignore your power and not tell your parents. I just didn’t want you to go through the same cruelty that I dealt with from our family growing up. You can do this, (Y/N). I know you can.” You smile, letting yourself be pulled into a hug.

“Thank you, Uncle John.”

“It’s time.” Madison interrupts.

You walk to the table that Madison stands behind, where an unlit candlestick stands. She looks at you, not as a friend, but as your superior. You can see now why so many people are afraid of her, because now you’re a little scared of her, too.

“The first wonder that we will be attempting today is telekinesis. (Y/N), please move the candlestick.”

You take a deep breath before staring intently at the object that sits mere feet ahead of you. Suddenly, you hear Michael’s voice in your head, so clear that it sounds like he’s right next to you: “channel that feeling, and use it.” You grin when the candlestick glides into your hand easily, picking it up triumphantly.

“Good. Now, light it.” This comes just as easily as the telekinesis, and a small flame pops onto the wick. John Henry laughs at your excitement, and even Madison has to fight back a smile.

“Told you you could do it.” John Henry gloats. “Now calm it down, levitation isn’t one of the Seven Wonders.”

You’re momentarily confused until you notice that the table itself is floating in the air. It drops back down with a crash, and you grimace.

“Sorry.” You mutter, a little shocked that there’s no holes in the floor.

“It’s fine, it happens.” Madison smirks, strutting out from behind the table to stand next to John Henry. “Your next Wonder will be concilium.”

Your smile falters as you recall what concilium is.

“Mind control? I’ve never even attempted this before.”

“The core of each Wonder lies in what you were taught for your first two. It’s all about intention. Intend to control one of us.” John Henry instructs.

You think, trying to decide on something that neither one of them would do. You want to control your uncle, but he seems too obvious a target. Besides, who can say that they controlled the Goddess of Witchcraft herself? You look Madison in her eyes, silently commanding her to do what you want. To your delight, she starts doing jumping jacks, which is exactly what you had wanted her to do. She rolls her eyes and groans, but still can’t stop.

“Really, (Y/N)? I hate exercising!” She whines. You giggle, John Henry snickering next to her before you break the connection and look away.

“I’m sorry, I had to do it.” You say innocently. Madison sighs, smoothing out her now-mussed hair and pulling her dress back to where it’s supposed to be.

“This next task will be the last of the evening,” She gets right down to business, and the serious tone has you dreading what comes next. “Due to the fact that you must complete it before sunrise. Complete it successfully, and we shall take a break before reconvening in the late afternoon. Failure will result in stoppage of the tests and, unfortunately...death.”

“This can’t be the last Wonder?” Your voice shakes with fear.

“This is the order that the Wonders are traditionally performed in. We cannot change them around, I’m sorry.” You nod, clenching your jaw.

“Alright, then.” Laying down on the floor, you sigh deeply.

“Do you remember the incantation?” John Henry stares down at you, worry in his eyes.

“Yes, I do.”

“Once you descend, your time will begin. You have until sunrise.” Madison says in a tone that lets you know she’s not enjoying this anymore than you are. Breathing deeply, you start to recite the incantation you had learned from one of the many books the Underworld’s library offered to you.

“Spiritu duce, in me est. Deduc me in tenebris vita ad extremum, ut salutaret inferi. Descensum.” Your eyesight darkens as your soul leaves your physical body and you descend into Hell.

When your eyes open again, you’re in a room that’s starkly white, momentarily confusing you; aren’t you supposed to be unaware of the fact that you’re in Hell? Furthermore, shouldn’t you be living out your worst fears? If you had more time, you would try to figure out why this is so different for you, but you decide to use your soul being in Hell to your advantage. The door opens easily, and you smile at the familiar black hallway that contains the personal Hells of so many. The small light at the end lets you know which way to go, which you do gladly.

The castle looks just the same as you remember it to be, but you don’t stop to admire the paintings this time. Instead you run towards where you hope Michael will be, almost desperate to find him. If they’re confused or shocked, the guards of the throne room certainly don’t show it. They barely glance your way before opening the doors for you, allowing you to slip in. Sure enough, Michael’s sitting slouched in his throne, a glass of what you’re assuming to be absinthe, due to the green color, in his hand. He looks disheveled, which is entirely unlike him.

“Michael!” You yell out, making his once-closed eyes open. Although he’s annoyed at first, shock crosses his face when he sees you.

“I’m finally going crazy.” He mutters, knocking the rest of his drink back before rubbing his eyes.

“No, it’s me, Michael. I’m here.” You reassure, watching him stumble to his feet before crossing the room to get to you.

“But how? You...you’ll die down here. You need to go.” He reaches a hand out to touch your face, but it goes right through your form. “You’re not actually here.”

“I descended.” You say proudly.

“Like ‘descensum’ descending?” You nod. “Are you taking the test of the Seven Wonders?”

You feel a little bad for Michael, who looks like he’s on the verge of a mental breakdown right now.

“Yes, but there’s a reason behind it! My uncle summoned Madison to help us with these tests because they both believe that, with my combination of light and night magic, I can pass the Seven Wonders and become the ‘Supreme.’ This would allow me to return here long enough to defeat Satan, since there would be a part of me that is powerful. It’d take longer for the Underworld to reach my mortal soul.” Michael’s silent, and you worry that he’s going to be upset with you. Instead, a slow grin starts to spread on his face.

“You are absolutely incredible, (Y/N). You’ve completed the three Wonders previous to descensum, then?”

“I did!”

“And you descended like it was nothing. Did you even have a hell?”

“No, I was just in a white room. I was fully aware of where I was the whole time, too, which is weird because you told me that people didn’t realize they were in Hell.”

“That’s my girl.” Your heart swells at the endearing compliment he gives you, and you blush. “I wish I could touch you.”

“I wish you could too, Michael. I’ll be back though, I promise.”

“I know you will. Even if the last time we get to see each other is when we’re fighting my father, at least we’ll get to be together.” He smiles sadly, his hand twitching as his body goes to touch you before his mind can remind him that it’s just your soul that’s here. “You should probably be returning to your body now. You know how time passes differently.”

“I don’t want to leave you.” You sigh, frowning at his reminder.

“Remember what you said, though. You’ll be back.” Michael steps back, taking one last look at you before nodding. “It’s time to go now, (Y/N). I’ll see you soon.”

“See you soon.” You think about returning to your body, your vision slowly disappearing like it did when you were descending down to the Underworld.

You sit up with a loud gasp, clutching at your chest while you try to get some air. Madison and John Henry both look up from where they’re sitting, both rushing towards you now that you’re back in your body.

“You did it. I knew you could do it.” John Henry pulls you into his arms, hugging you tightly.

“What was your hell like?” Madison asks. By her expression change, she definitely wasn’t expecting you to smile upon recalling it.

“I didn’t have one. I woke up in a white room and knew where I was the whole time. I decided to leave and I found Michael.”

“You did?”

“Yeah, he...he told me how much he misses me, and that he knows I’m going to pass the rest of the tests.”

“You’re amazing.”

Although Madison said that you would be extremely drained after returning to your physical body, you feel more invigorated than ever. You want to test the rest of the Wonders out, but neither her nor John Henry will allow you too. Instead, you find yourself in one of the spare bedrooms, trying to sleep in order to please the two who are overseeing your tests. Sleep eludes you, though, and you don’t mind one bit. Sleeplessness is a million times better than sleeping if it means you can relive your recent encounter with Michael over and over again.

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