#not Jazz because she's grown and can take care of herself but she's happy to let Jason be a parent to her siblings because their parents

[gloster]

FAVORITE FANFICS OF 2020

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

I know I speak for all when I say....I cannot wait to toss 2020 out the door the way Uncle Phil constantly did with Jazz. One of the things that got me through this rough year, besides family & friends & BTS, were fanfics.

It’s that time of year again where I make a list of all the fanfics that I absolutely adored. Some are by veteran favs of mine, others are new to me who just knocked it out of the park. If you’re interested in past lists, here is 2019′s list and 2018′s. If y’all are interested in doing your own fanfic favs of the year, please do so and tag me. Always on the hunt for new favs. 

So without furhter ado, my fav fanfics of 2020:

1). Another Word for Forever series by stardropdream (sheith)

Summary: Shiro knows better than to expect love in an arranged marriage. This is all for the sake of universal peace, after all, and solidifying a Terran-Galran alliance. At the very least, Shiro can hope to make a friend out of this. Becoming friends would be much easier, though, if he and his husband could actually communicate. 

With a language barrier and a mountain of cultural differences between them, getting to know Keith proves to be a challenge. Luckily, Shiro's always worked well with challenges.

2020 shockingly became the year of sheith. I ended up rewatching the show w/my bestie @littlenightdragon​. Diving more deeply into it w/my other bestie @kila09​. She and I spent the better half of this year devouring so many fanfics of them in various AUs. I came across new fanfic authors, and stardropdream is among them. 

If I could describe this series & stardropdream, I’ll take a cue from Lady Gaga: “ talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show stopping, spectacular, never the same, totally unique, completely not ever been done before, unafraid to reference or not reference, put it in a blender, shit on it, vomit on it, eat it, give birth to it”

This series was just PERFECTION. I’ve gotten into arranged-marriage AUs and this has been one of the best I’ve read. It was just perfection. The language barrier definitely added an extra charm to it, in which Shiro finds his own ways to get to know his husband better: both creative and funny ways. So many cute moments, so many funny moments with Hunk being the translating middle man between them, and the smut. THE SMUT. THE SMUT. THE SMUT. Just *chef’s kiss* Incredible. It was just so so sweet, and such a comfort read. I reread this series 5 times already and hope Robin (the writer) does more stories in this AU.

Please read this series. You’re not gonna regret it. It will MELT your heart. 

Honorable Mentions:

If I Called You Mine

Sail Across the Sky Just to Get to You

Finding Shelter (The Alien Baby Remix)

Say You Do(n’t)

2). The Golden Hour by @goldentruth813​ (sheith)

Summary:  After a space mission failure, Shiro loses his arm and his career. Two years later he's settled into a quiet and simple new life on his farm, but when a beautiful alien crashes in his field, he discovers the answers to his questions—and possibly the keys to his future—will come from the stars.

I’m sure no one, least of all Janel the writer herself, is surprised to see this author featured on this list. For now the 3rd year in a row. WOOOW  👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿 She is the reason I got into shieth, and she just continues to put out amazing conent with them. This story by far has been the best she’s done this year-possibly one of the best ever. 

We have Shiro trying to have a simple life at the farm with his dog and animals. A curious BOM Keith who shakes things up with his boldness/innocence-and questions bound to test blood pressure, especially Shiro’s. Loads of cute moments, loads of funny moments, and also loads of oreos. 

If summary and my thoughts don’t sell you, only one thing will: reading it for yourself.

Honorable mentions:

Two Hearts in Bloom

Mountain Men

Home is in Your Heart

3). Spun like Gold by Neyasochi (sheith)

Summary: Though Shiro is currently operating his fledgling bakery business out of a decrepit food truck he got for cheap in a repossession sale, he dreams of something more: a cozy bakery and cafe on a tree-lined street somewhere, filled with the smell of fresh coffee and sugar glaze instead of diesel. A little money could go a long way to helping him get off the ground-- and luckily, Keith has money to burn.

Or: Keith takes care of Shiro’s financial woes, in exchange for a little sugar.

OMG, OMG, OMG was this story so sweet. Neyasochi already sold me with the baking/baker Shiro trope, but went a step further throwing in sugar-daddy Keith who knows his way around his manic family and cars, but when it comes to asking a cute guy out? What better way to make an impression than becoming his best paying customer?  

Honorable mentions:

oh, devour me

Healing Touch

on your hand of gold 

4). The Destiny You Sold by @tryslora​ (drarry)

Summary: In which Draco knits, Harry makes wands, and things get very tangled up between them.

If there’s one thing I love about fanfics is how they introduce you to tropes you never would consider before. Draco and knitting was a combo I didn’t realize how much I needed until now. And I love the fact knitting played a big part of the accidental bonding. Also loved the fact everyone in their friend group shipped them like crazy. Highly, highly recommend 

5) What’s My Age Again? by @lazywonderlvnd​ (drarry)

Summary: Harry Potter has had enough of pleasing the public, and his reckless tendencies are finally getting out of hand.

The Quidditch World Cup is only a week away; as Captain of the English National Team, Hermione has assured him that his immaturity won’t be tolerated by the Ministry.

And then Malfoy shows up.

(Inspired by the blink-182 song of the same name.)

It’s no secret that I’m such a fangirl of @lazywonderlvnd​. Any drarry story I read, I always love. Last year, I ADORED The Changing Lights, which was one of my favorites last year, and her updating/finishing the story was a massive highlight for me. I thank ya for that. 

This story was honestly refreshing. I’ve grown so used to Harry being responsible, always doing what’s right, that seeing a story where Harry pretty much has his middle finger in the air to “good reputation”, “being responsible,” because as he brought up: “I’m 25. I’ve been fighting all my life. I’ve earned my life to have fun.”

Okay, granted, it wasn’t quite like that but it was along those lines. And I agree. After all he went through, Harry deserves to have fun. He deserves to be reckless and make stupid decisions.

Also, it was such a blast reading a story where Harry is the brat & Draco has to keep him in line. LOVED.

Honorable mentions: 

Inside Your Mind

Aletheia

6). Chocolate and Pastry by agentmoppet, anemonen (drarry)

Summary:  When Pansy bets Draco that there is no chance he and Harry could carry out a genuine romantic relationship, he and Harry form a plan. But as their fake relationship progresses, Draco sees a side of Harry he never expected. Harry is struggling with something, pushing it far down inside him where he doesn't have to acknowledge its existence. Draco starts to worry, and then he starts to care, and then... horribly... he starts to fall in love.

Do not let the title fool you like it did me. Title alone, I was thinking it was going to be a fun, fluffy story involving baking, maybe chocolate crafting. However....it was not that at all. It was more. A lot deeper. A lot more angsty. It explored mental health, PTSD and the dangers of loved ones ignoring the signs, and contained an important message:

You can’t love someone out of their illness/disease/ addiction. Which is true and this story showed that. 

7). i’m still here by owedbetter (zutara)

Summary: "You see me."

And somehow, that makes all the difference.

If there’s one of the few good things 2020 has brought, it was Netflix bringing back ATLA to their library. Which in turn ignited my love for zutara & had me drag @kila09​ into that ship. 

This story was just incredible. The way it was written, it really felt like it could have been canon. Deleted scenes that a certain creator didn’t want us to see. The way Zuko and Katara came together, starting from their peaceful friendship after the Southern Raiders episode up, becoming closer along the way. 

I dare y’all to read this and not think OMG...is this secret canon bonus material? I definitely plan to read more by owedbetter. 

8). all the what ifs i never said by rosegardenlake (sheith)

Summary:  Keith is nine when he first notices Shiro. Shiro is gentle and quiet, always keeping to himself. Keith is rough and loud, running wherever his feet will take him, screaming on the top of his lungs into the wind. But despite that, they're a constant throughout each other's lives...if only that could be enough. As they grow, Keith just wants them both to be happy, but instead, he's falling apart.

Rosegardenlake is another sheith writer who I adored last year & adore this year as well. This was a story that I read during the beginning of quarantine-life and when I tell you the number of times Keith’s emotions of loneliness got to me, it’s a big number. 

Keith’s struggle with life after high school, after peaking in school, and his mental health reminded me too much of where I was at 2018, which wasn’t a good year for me at all, especially mentally. So that was triggering but it was also helpful since I saw how far I came. And it was beautiful seeing how far Keith came. 

Also the relationship between Shiro and Keith was just beautiful. It’s very funny how Keith was Shiro’s protector growing up and Shiro became Keith’s later on in life. There’s a chance your heart may be heavy, but will also be so swelled up with feelings these two bring it. 

Honorable mentions:

Where the Light Doesn’t Reach 

9). When Night Comes by Oh_Hey_Tae (BTS; poly ot7)

Summary: Jungkook’s tipsy, but he’s not buzzed enough to miss that he doesn’t recognize any of the four dozen people here. And seeing as his friends aren’t ones to ditch and there’s no way they’d play a prank this mean on him, Jungkook reaches the conclusion that he just walked into a stranger’s very expensive home, uninvited, and started eating their food and petting their well-dressed dog.

(Or: Jungkook shows up to the wrong Halloween party and meets the most powerful family in Seoul.)

I can easily say Oh_Hey_Tae easily one of my favorite BTS fanfic favs. Always come through with the stories, and this one was just amazing. We have Jungkook stumbling into a Halloween story, and soon enters into a intense, insane relationship with all six guys, who are already in a relationship with each other. Oh, and supernatural creatures at that. 

You do see certain relationships are stronger, deeper. For example, a lot of moments between Jin and Jungkook. Vmin has their own story and moments. But it was just so amazing. 

Fair warning. Halfway through, things get darker and Oh_My_Tae really loves playing readers diirty with the angst, but it’s so good. 

10). peace-weaver by magisterpavus (sheith)

Summary: You will be the peace-weaver, his mother told him, smiling though her dark eyes welled with unshed grief. The one who brings two bitter enemies together and ends the bloodshed and death between us, once and for all.

But men will always crave war. The Galra, most of all.

Yet another arranged-marriage AU that I loved. This particular one is well-loved in the sheith fandom. I can definitely say it’s considered one of the classic fanfics that’s been read or shared at one point or another. 

The story itself reminded me a lot of Macbeth, involving murder and dark forces at bay. The dynamics between Shiro and Keith reminded me of Drogo and Daenerys from GOT, one of my fav couples there, which only made it all the more better for me. 

I do credit the author for the creative approach they took with quintessence and Shiro’s role/persona as the Champion

Honorable mentions:

The Boy in the Window 

Sheith Demon/Priest AU

A Matter of Scale

Directive 

Honorable mentions that I seriously wanted to add to the list but this post is already lengthy. All amazing, all greats reads by various writers y’all should check out:

Hold Me Tight, or Don’t by snowfallen (yoonmin with a Mr. & Mrs. Smith AU featuring assassins and hitmen, secret identities, fake marriage, and a lot of smut)

The Prince and Pirate by Maniacani, @nerdherderette​ (drarry with a splash of royalty and pirates. Perfect if you’re needing to fill in any Pirates of the Caribbean or Black Sails cravings)

First Kisses are the Best Ones by SashaDistan (sheith in a 50 First Dates Fusion heartfelt/heart-gutting story)

freely, as men strive for right by @bixgirl1​ (drarry w/Harry explaining the many ways why Draco’s the love of his life. we love to see it)

The Sacrificed by SasuNarufan13 (sasunaru w/ dark fairytale elements similar to Little Red Riding Hood & Beauty and the beast + feat. mpreg)

Chasing Treacle Tart (and Draco Malfoy) by xErised (drarry feat. lunch lady Draco + scheming Harry + loads of fun w/sweets & more)

Red Desert by @beatitudinembty​ (taekook in a unique sci-fi AU; hard to explain but so worth a read

one way ticket to another life by starboykeith (sheith Hades x Persephone background)

Even So by lewilder (zutara; arranged marriage+ language barrier +soft strangers to lovers)

Well, lovely people, there you have it. My top 10 favorite fanfics of the year. I do notice a certain ship shows up a lot on this list, but I wasn’t kidding when I said they took over this year. Still, I tried to mix the list up with other fav ships/fandoms of mine. To the writers who created these incredible stories. I applaud you. I thank you for creating and sharing these wonderful stories. Anyone interested in doing the tag, please do. 

HAPPY NEW YEAR, GUYS

#favorite fanfics of the year #favorite fanfics #fanfic recs #fic recs #drarry #drarry fanfic recs #drarry fic recs #drarry recs #sheith #sheith fanfic recs #sheith fic recs #sheith recs #zutara #zutara fanfic recs #zutara fic recs #zutara recs #bts #bts fanfic recs #bts fic recs #taekook #yoonmin #ot7 #sasunaru #sasunaru fanfic rec

[bigdudette]

Kinlist

I originally posted this a while ago but decided to edit it cause I changed, and it was inaccurate. This isn’t in a particular order btw. 

 Maki Harukawa -  Maki has always been the most relatable character to me. Her entite arc always hit a bit too close to home. I have grown a lot as a person, but can’t help it but relate to her still. I always found her whole thing with kids relatable as well. I “hate” kids, or at least sorta. I guess I more so hate the idea of them? But I still usually end up taking care of them. 

Toko Fukawa -  I am indeed an INFP so her whole bit about fantasizing I found relatable. Also her viewing the world through a grimy and pessimistic lense is quite similar to me. Then there’s the part ab her being a writer

Mona Megistus - It’s not just cause I’m into astrology, I swear. I always found her relatable but after seeing her mirage andd all that jazz, I felt so much stronger ab her. The bit about her always being broke - not cause she didn’t earn any money but because of her expensive habits hit me right in the gut.

Fischl - Again, I’m an INFP who writes fan fiction. I constantly live inside my own fantasies. Idk what else to say. Also can we talk ab when she randomly breaks character? Cause I loved tht

Diane Nguyen - Another writer, who is shocked? She doesn’t write a lot of fiction but I relate to that part of her as well. All though with Diane, it’s mostly about her state of mind and mental health. 

Jinx - Oh Boy, here comes the abandonement issues. She is one of the ones I’m a bit insecure ab kinning. When I say I’m a Jinx kinnie it’s not cause I’m so quirky that i relate to a murderer. I think the way her untreated anxiety and abandonment issues turned into something much much worse. This one hurt me to type out fellas

Reko Yabusame - Once again, the thing with kids comes up. I like taking care of people weaker than me, a lot like Reko. It’s not a power thing, but more like a “that could’ve been me” thing, cause I know what it’s like to feel powerless. I also gotta say her interest in music also speaks to me. She’s up there with my highest kins. 

Robin Buckley - She likes boobies, I like boobies. No, but seriously, I always found her relatable but after s4 I consider her a kin. Idk how to go into depth here, it just is what it is. I can say that I have the tendency to not be able to shut up once I star yip yapping away, so there’s that. 

Tsukimi Kurashita - One of my lesser known kins, but doesn’t mean I kin her any less. Another Infp to add to the list while we’re at it. I may not be obsessed with Jellyfish but I do have obsessions and ambitions. How she acts in public, her awkwardness, everything.

Marceline - Music is one of my passions as well as writing. I am such a sensitive person but that can be hard to show in a healthy manner. Music has helped me so much in that regard. I also am into pink girls who are into science.

Lapis Lazuli - The trauma of it all! The isolating yourself because you don’t know how else to cope part! I just want to see her happy because everything about her is painfully relatable. 

Catra -  Soooo again, we have abandoment issues. She’s also in love with her childhood best friend. She also copes with being super destructive having no regard for how that may affect those around her or even herself, as multiple of the characters above.

Rue Bennett - Again with the very destructive coping mechanisms. How she acts. I’m not an addict but my own behaviour has led me to living quite the similar life to her. 

#danganronpa #kin list #genshin #arcane #danganronpa maki #maki harukawa #jinx #catra #steven universe #lapis #lapis lazuli #euphoria #rue #rue bennett #danganronpa toko #toko fuwaka #bojack diane #bojack horseman #diane nguyen #princess jellyfish #tsukimi kurashita #stranger things #robin buckley #fischl #mona #mona megistus #yttd #reko yttd #reko yabusame

[nctinfo]

[TRANS] Johnny & Jaehyun’s interview with W Korea May 2020 issue!

Today was a day where we borrowed the cinematic imagination of the 1996 film <Romeo and Juliet" directed by Baz Luhrmann and created two Romeos. Both of you portrayed the 'Modern Day Romeo' well, how did you think the shooting went? Johnny: It felt like we came out to play. The setting too, it felt just like any small town in America. When I was leaning against the bed during the shoot, I danced excitedly while holding a bunch of grapes (laughs). Romeo, I think, is someone who is honest with his feelings and who wants to achieve love till the end. Thanks to this, regardless of what others might think, I had fun during the shoot. Jaehyun: From the Hawaiian shirts with palm trees to leopard print belts. Above all, the outfits were bold. The point of today was to act like someone who plays around and has always worn this kind of style. There was a scene [in the movie] where Romeo flips over the white blankets and plays around with Juliet, but it wasn't easy [to portray that scene] because of the blood that rushed to my face (laughs).

It’s a shame we don’t have a Juliet today. If you were to summon Juliet right now, what outfit would she appear in? And what do you imagine would be the first thing she says? Johnny: A simple outfit would be nice. For today’s shoot I was wearing a white short sleeved t-shirt and cream coloured jeans, so Juliet would have a similar vibe and would say ‘Are you doing well?’ filled with affection and excitement. Jaehyun: She’d appear in a white t-shirt and blue jeans. With a short ‘I missed you’.

There are two male leads in the movie <Romeo and Juliet>. There is Romeo who is a romanticist with rich emotions but who is hesitant in front of love, and there is Tybalt who is a calm strategist but sometimes emits fiery charms like a bulldozer. Between the two, who do you feel like you're similar to? Johnny: I think I'm similar to Tybalt who wants to be like Romeo. I'm the type of person to carry out something immediately when you decide on it. On the other hand, I want to learn from Romeo's attitude to be faithful and honest with your feelings the moment you fall in love. Jaehyun: I'm the opposite of Johnny. I think I'm Romeo who wants to resemble Tybalt's calm and analytical side. Normally, I'm the type to follow my feelings rather than reasoning, so if I had to choose between the two, it would be Romeo.

If some day your story gets made into a movie, what song would you want to be played in the ending credits? Johnny: On bright sunny days like lately the mood is refreshed and tender. If the movie will be about me in spring, then Mac Miller’s ‘Circles’ would be nice. If I ever get to make a movie in the future, any Coldplay song would be good. Coldplay’s music feels like home, music genres come and go, but in the end when I need stability I always seem to turn to Coldplay. Jaehyun: In my own movie, first of all I don’t think we need a post credit scene (laugh). I’ve always cherished Chet Baker’s ‘I fall in love too easily’. It’s a tasty song that you can listen to on repeat with an empty head, without thinking anything. Chet Baker’s trumpet performance and voice always strangely draw my ears in.

The title song 'Kick It' of your 2nd full album <NCT#127 Neo Zone> that was released in March actively incorporates the identity of cine kids hero, Bruce Lee. Taking over Bruce Lee's baton, is there a movie protagonist who you want to express musically? Johnny: Exactly two people come to mind. First, Brad Pitt from the movie <Fight Club>, I want to try a song with a strong beat with a fighter's unique fiery temperament. It would be great to incorporate the shocking twist of the movie. The other is Will Smith in the movie <The Pursuit of Happiness>. It's a 'life' movie I want to give five stars. No matter what twists and turns, it's a movie that eventually ends with a happy ending. It would be nice to sing [a song] with a message that even though it's hard now, you'll be happy in the end. A slow ballad would suit that, right? Jaehyun: Even though I acted as him today, Romeo would be fun [to express]. It would be a song that shouts love, but it would be perfect if it contains everything from joy, anger, sorrow, and pleasure like in the movie. When I think of James Dean in the movie <Rebel Without a Cause> I imagine music that puts together spicey funky beats based on the old sounds of jazz bands. Recently I'm really into jazz, soul, and R&B, so a band sound is essential.

Even if it's not someone who everyone knows like Bruce Lee, is there someone you two consider to be a hero? Johnny: I don't really express it well normally, but my mom? I'm an only child that was born late, so I always stuck to my mother when I was young. Looking back, I think my mother was a person who sacrificed herself to her family but still valued her happiness. I want to resemble the way she always lives consciously while having fun. It was my mother who taught me how to feel and enjoy every moment. My mom often told me that the experience of 'trying' something is important. For example, I spent my childhood in the United States, and no matter what, we always celebrated the independence day, which is on July 4th, with family and watched the fireworks. On days when the moon was bright and full, we'd be outside watching it. Thanks to this, I think I've grown up as a person with rich emotions. Jaehyun: my grandmother. Despite nearing 80 years old, she had been a dancer until recently and is now retired. She doesn't miss the broadcasts I appear on and watches everything, and after the broadcast ends, she will always send me long KakaoTalk messages with feedback. Because she's a dancer, there are times when she points out my fingertips and neckline but in general, she tells me what kind of mindset I should have when it comes to life. I always get advice from teachers and people around me, but strangely, every word from my grandmother seems to really pierce me. [She tells me] Don't mind others, live enjoying everything you can take on. I still hold [those words] close to me.

It's been quite a while since the first stage you did in the name of NCT 127. What was the driving force behind you during this long time? Johnny: fans, members, family. Looking back, it seems like it was people that led me. Fans are the 'reason' for me to do something. The members are my companions who walk together for this reason, and wouldn't my family be my roots. Having a place to go back to is a completely different story. I think it's family that shows me that I can fall sometimes and that I have somewhere to go back to. Jaehyun: I was able to endure my trainee days purely because I liked music. It's the same now. Of course, our fans who like our music and who come and watch our stages are a great strength too. One difference is that, until now, I relied on the people around me and tried to lean my body on the 'crew', but I seem to have found a driving force within myself recently. I give myself strength by pushing myself or complimenting myself, that's how I find enlightenment within myself. In this sense, as a human, I feel like I'm going through a time of maturity.

If you could go back in time, what would you tell yourself if you could pat yourself on the back right before going up on the stage for the first time? Johnny: ‘Have confidence. Even if your spirits fall, work on everything’. I don’t know how it might have looked on the outside but my state of mind now seems to be very different from then. I’m much more free now. I kept telling myself that I’m nice and confident, and now I think I am able to stand confident like this. I don’t know why I only saw the flaws in the past. Now, rather than trying to make up for my weaknesses, I tend to focus on maximising my strengths instead. Jaehyun: ‘Do what you want, what you think is right and what you like. Of course I know you’ll do fine, but it would be nice to be a bit more daring.’

What are 3 adjectives that describe you? Johnny: Energetic, romantic, selfish. The last word I chose because I think in order to make another person happy, I need to be happy myself and only when I have a sense of security I can care for other people. Jaehyun: I like classic stuff so first of all, classic, continuous because I always try to learn and grow, and firm in terms of trying to remain as stable as possible.

What were you born with, and on the other hand what weren’t you born with that you’re trying to achieve? Johnny: Seems like I was born with curiosity. Like I’ve mentioned before, my mom has influenced me a lot. On the other hand I want to make passion my thing. Sometimes I look at the members when I’m lazing around. Everyone has their ‘one passion’! Jaehyun: Ever since I was little I would always fix the TV at home whenever it broke down. I think I’ve been born with dexterity. I seem to be good at sports, but I really need flexibility (laugh). I also want to break up with my short lived resolve. To speak, I lack persistence a little. When I really like something or if I have a clear reason to do it, my body moves. If there’s neither, I fall into the swamp of one short lived resolve to another. (laugh)

As a listener of <NCTs Night Night>, a show that was hosted by the two of you in the past, I think you were compassionate and were counselors who had shown more empathy than other people of your age. Today, let's write the concerns of you two. What's your biggest concern now after passing April 12th, 2020? Johnny: Although it's a little embarrassing to say it in words, my biggest concern these days is how to be a strength for the fans who we can't meet because of the recent situation. Most importantly, I don't want to be distressed and spend this time more meaningful. Jaehyun: What the heck to do at home! I'm the type to be very active. Nobody can go outside so I'm working hard in trying to find something I can do home alone. I've watched movies, listened to music and cooked, but I can't help but still feel the itch [to do something].

When you watch your web variety show <NCT LIFE>, you two are often seen standing in the kitchen. Is there any dish you want to make for that one precious person in the future? I wonder what the specific recipe is and what the mood of the day will be like. Johnny: First of all, I wanna make breakfast. Omelets are good to eat in the morning. Omelets are well made when you think 'even though it's bad, it's good'! Stir-fry onions and bell peppers until they become sweet, then sprinkle some pepper to finish it. The time would be good at 09:30 am when the sunlight is strong enough to see the dust. That precious one would be sitting in a chair (laughs). The table will be set with cutlery and two cups of coffee. So that you can open the morning in a relaxed and simple manner. Jaehyun: Samgyetang and stir-fried pork, is that too native? (laughs) If I had to choose one, I will pick the stir-fried pork that was also complimented on <NCT LIFE>. Sometimes only red pepper paste or red pepper powder is used for the sauce, but I tend to use both. It would be great if there was a pretty plate with fruit too, it's the perfect dessert.

Even if it’s not a cooking moment, what’s the time, place, thing or person that makes you the most gentle? Johnny: From noon to 2pm. I feel the most peaceful when the sun is shining at that time. I don’t really care about the place. As for a thing, a scented candle that I have received as a gift while filming <NCT LIFE> in Thailand. For people, anyone! Jaehyun: Late night nearing the dawn. I really like watching the night view. I think the Han River could make me the most gentle. Personal things like earphones or speakers. Being together with family would be nice.

As a person and as a musician, what time do you think you’re going through? Johnny: I always feel like I'm at the starting line. Even when I do the same thing, I have to have a new mindset in order to grow. Jaehyun: It’s a slow process for humans but I seem to be slowly becoming more mature. As a musician, when the time comes I’ll be looking from a distance thinking I’m making ‘my own’ thing.

Translation: Alex, Esmee @ FY! NCT (NCTINFO) | Source: W Korea Scans — Do not repost or take out without our permission!

#NCT #johnny #jaehyun #t:trans #t:interview #W Korea #W Korea: May 2020

[darkdevasofdestruction]

Fluffy Days ~ Jumin Han x Reader

Everyone, when they looked at Jumin, they saw him for his position as the Director and future CEO of one of the top 5 biggest, wealthiest companies in South Korea, so it was needless to say that, before thinking of how much he worked to perfect himself to be the best version of a professional director as he can, despite the title being given hereditary, people would still think of all the riches he was blessed with.

Many, like Zen and Yoosung, would envy him for having so much money and being able to do anything he could even dream of, including any weird fantasy like creating a wine line specifically for cats, or a cat brand...

And only he knows what else he thought of, but never tried to give form to.

However, very few ever looked at him for being a hard-working man, business-orientated, rational, logical and always putting the benefit of the company above all else.

But...

Was Jumin truly happy the way he was?

That question was answered one day, when a certain maiden called Y/N found a weird phone on the ground, and somehow found herself joining this charity organisation called RFA, and given her profession as a Vet, and having enough money for herself, and obviously not being a materialistic gold-digger...

Well, the brunet man of the RFA found himself completely entranced by this mysterious woman, who, in time, will end up being his girlfriend, and even more, his fiancee.

In due time, though, there is no rush.

The other important question that even fewer people ever ask themselves was...

Was Jumin never stressed out or over-worked?

And the answer goes pretty obvious that yes, he was, rather often, but he masks that and tries to cope with it by retorting to his childish self that has been long locked away, and yet, sometimes resurfaces when needed, so he does silly cat projects.

Now that he has a lover, however, he can allow himself to go on dates, that began rather fancy, but upon her protest, became more relaxed and casual, preferring peace and content to extravagance and luxuries.

They would go on a picnic in the forest nearby, take impulsive trips to what-ever place they felt like, sometimes throwing a dart on a world map on the wall and going wherever it lands, or going on shopping sprees for whatever self-care items they felt like, doing skin care routines together from time to time, cuddling together in the cinema room, eating commoner cinema snacks that he has to admit, aren’t too bad (although he won’t trade the ‘Melanin’ stake for popcorn).

There are, however, some days when he would just want to stay at home and cuddle with Y/N and Elizabeth the 3rd - Those days are definitely the most stressful and he needs to calm himself down before he bursts with weird emotions, which is something he prides himself to never do, and yet, he acknowledges the fact that it is not impossible, and he is still just a human, not a heartless robot as some claim he is.

As soon as he got home, Jumin sighed, going to his room, threw his blazer on the chair nearby, and folding up his sleeves, he let himself fall on his bed, looking at the ceiling with an exhausted and annoyed expression, before closing his eyes altogether, taking a few deep breaths to calm down.

Sighing at the deplorable state her beloved was in, she went to the bathroom and drew hot water, putting in some lavender bath salt, lighting up some incense sticks, some scented candles with lavender, vanilla and cinnamon, made the lights be dim, put bubble solution and waited until it was hot and steamy in the bath, as she searched for some calming Lo-Fi music, choosing some mountain sounds that had soft bird chirping and forest sounds included.

When everything was perfect, she threw in a Lush northern lights bathbomb, loving how great the purple and blue blended together, and went out, sitting on the side of the bed next to Jumin, gently brushing away the hair from his face and kissing his forehead.

“Come on, darling, I drew you a bath. Let’s help you relax a bit...Shall we?” she spoke in that soft voice that could always sooth his worries away.

He didn’t have the power to say much, but humming positively, he sluggishly followed Y/N to the bathroom, where his eyes widen and how aesthetically pleasing and relaxing the bathroom became.

It was almost like he never had any idea how relaxing a bath can be, and not as much of a ‘chore’ as he felt it was.

Y/N told him to take his clothes off already and get in the water before it gets cold, which seemed to make him chuckle in amusement, but did so without any protesting, and he found himself sighing at how good it felt having his sore, tense muscles tended by the hot water.

She pushed him gently down by the shoulders until he was up to his chin in water, then went to pour a glass of his favourite red wine for him to enjoy.

“Is this how you always take baths?” he asked in a lower voice. “Most of the time, yes. I make this ritual whenever I feel the need to properly relax, and it sort of became like a Pavlovian reflex, y’know?” she snorter in amusement, sitting on the ground next to the bathroom. “I see...Now I understand why you were always looking forward to them.” he nodded slightly in agreement. “I’m happy if it can help you as well. I haven’t seen you this stressed since the whole Sarah and Elizabeth the 3rd problem.” she gave him a sad smile, which made him look deep into her eyes with a pondering look. “I don’t appreciate too many unexpected things coming up all at once.” he nodded, leaning back once again. “What kind of music is this?” “Oh, this! It’s called Lo-Fi, and it’s mostly for relaxing. It has all sorts of genres and types, but this, in particular, is a mountain Lo-Fi. Do you like it? I know it’s different to the classical music you always had, but I thought maybe a little change wouldn’t hurt. I-I can change it back to Debussy and Vivaldi if you don’t like it!” she blinked, her eyes widening at the realisation that she messed up, but he could only chuckle at her cute reactions. “I don’t mind this. It’s pretty nice. Perhaps, as you said, a change in the usual routine wouldn’t hurt once in a while.” he gave her a soft smile, which left her weak to her knees. “Sweet. Let me pamper you up a bit, then.” she grinned, as she started applying a hydrating face mask, putting two big cucumber slices on his eyes. “Why...Are you doing all this for me, Y/N?” he asked, unsure of himself. “Why? Because you’re stressed out an you need to relax, obviously.” she spoke as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Yes, I know, but...Why...?” he asked again, putting emphasis on the last world. “Ohh, I think I get what you mean. Because I love you, of course. I want to spoil you because you love me, and you care about me, and you make me happy, so of course, I want to do anything in my power to reciprocate and make sure you know how much I love you.” her words were so sweet and innocent that Jumin felt the burning need to throw away those stupid cucumber slices and look at her beautiful face, but decided against that impulse, so he won’t upset her and her thoroughly prepared routine.

After that, she took away the slices and gently washed away the cream-mask, in circular motions, as he massaged his face, and he truly felt in Heaven for the first time in ages.

If this wasn’t bliss, he had no idea what else could be.

And if that wasn’t enough, the shower gel she put on the sponge smelled like home-made chocolate, and as she gently rubbed his shoulders, arms and neck, he had to use all the self-restraint he had not to grab her arms and get her in the tub with him so he can hold her tightly to his chest and kiss her until he forgot to breathe altogether.

It lasted for at least an hour, but Jumin got a bit bored and restless of staying in the bathtub, and told the girl he’s done for now, she brought him his bath robe and told him to get in his sleeping wear while she cleans and organises stuff around the bathroom, as it was one of her little quirks, to have everything in order, which always amuses him since he does the exact same thing all the time, going as far as to scold Assistant Kang for not putting the folders on his desk at the exact millimeters specified.

As soon as she was ready, Y/N did a short night time skin care routine and went to her lover, cuddling with him and bringing out the laptop and putting on his favourite movie on the huge plasma TV that he only ever turned on thanks to her.

Jumin wasn’t even sure if he was paying attention to the movie, as he let Y/N hug his head to her chest, gently playing with his hair in a way that made him almost sleepy, yet very warm and content, his past stress and worries being long eradicated.

He remembered her saying that since she was very little, and even now, when she’s all grown up, she always loves crawling in her mum’s arms in bed and letting her play with her hair, as it was one of the few things that can combat her insomnia and help her sleep peacefully...

And now, she was doing it to him, and he felt more than honoured to be subject to such personal, intimate and comforting act of pampering.

That is the kind of privilege he would do anything to achieve, and it was happening to him, as the angel that his girlfriend is was always the one person who could somehow make him feel happy by merely existing.

Outside was a gorgeous night, and Jumin’s dormitory was illuminated by nothing more than the twinkling stars and the glorious silvery light of the moon that was looking over the two lovers holding each other under the covers of the master bed, while faint jazz music played in the background, as it was one of their little before-sleep rituals, still feeling the little euphoria from the movie they just watched.

“Jumin...I love you. And I’m really grateful for everything you’ve done for me. Never forget that, okay?” the h/c girl spoke in a gentle voice, as the man ran his fingers through her long locks, just as he would play with his cat’s fur, and she’d start purring. “I won’t forget, Y/N. I’m glad you were able to convince me to meet up with you, despite the circumstances, back then when we barely knew each other. No, actually, I am glad that you found that phone.” Jumin’s velvety voice spoke out, ringing in her ears. “Want to go out tomorrow? I have a free day tomorrow at the clinic. We can go have a walk through the forest or the park, if you want.” Y/N suggested, drawing shapes on the man’s chest absent-mindedly. “I don’t see why not. Elizabeth the 3rd is at V’s and I’ll have Assistant Kang erase everything from tomorrow’s schedule. I believe I had some meeting with another business with a group of women...Not something I’m too fond of.” he groaned slightly, making the girl chuckle and raise slowly, resting her form on her elbow. “What, you don’t want to throw around too many compliments and sickeningly sweet sugar-coated words in just one day?” she chuckled, a teasing smirk on her face. “The more I look at you, the more you remind me of a vixen. I don’t see any reason why I should carelessly throw around compliments to thirsty women who are only in it for my money and looks, when I could direct them all to that one person who holds my heart.” Jumin shot right back, making the girl dramatically put her hand over her heart, mimicking that she got shot by Cupid’s arrow. “Mon Dieu, my ears can’t believe what they’re hearing, are you sure you’re not trying to charm me again?” she leaned down to plant a soft kiss on his lips, as one of her hands gently brushed away the fringe from his face. “There is no end line to the path to someone’s affections. I believe that once you found the special someone, one should continue to show their appreciation towards said person.” his words soothed her heart like a nice glass of rose syrup as he snaked his hands around her waist and brought her back into an embrace, her head resting on his shoulder. “You always know how to make my heart beat like crazy.” she nuzzled her face in the crook of his neck, giggling softly, making the man shiver slightly. “Just like a fox.” he muttered, chuckling lightly.

#mysmes #mysmes x reader #mysmes imagine #mystic messenger x reader #mystic messenger imagines #mystic messenger #jumin han x reader #jumin han imagine #jumin han #jaehee kang #zen #hyung ryu #yoosung kim #seven #saeyoung choi #jihyun kim #vanderwood #mary vanderwood 3rd #saeran choi #rfa #mystic messenger rfa #mint eye #magenta

[alexiessan]

Never alone - Chapter Twenty - Soulmate AU

AO3

Previous - Here - Next

Master List

Marinette was a bit sad when they had to go back to Paris. They had only three days of Holiday left, and it was better for them to have a day or two to get rid of the jet lag.

She had been so happy to meet Damian’s family as a whole and relieved that she got along with them. She was also sad that she had to say goodbye to Titus, she has grown attached to the big dog.

They were, however, very happy to see Cloud again as they picked her up from Claude’s house. The fashion designer laughed as the puppy ran to them and Damian picked her up in a hug, forgetting about everyone else.

“Thank you so much for watching over her, Claude. I hope it wasn’t an inconvenience to your family,” she said with a smile as she rummaged in her bag.

Claude waved her off. “Of course not! She was lovely and got my family wrapped around her… paw,” he laughed, “we’re sad to see her go honestly. We wouldn’t mind keeping her a little longer.”

“Absolutely not,” declared Damian, his voice muffled as his face was burrowed into Cloud’s white, fluffy fur.

Marinette smiled and patted Damian’s back fondly. She handed Claude a few bills but he waved his hand in front of him.

“No way I’m accepting money from you guys!”

The Eurasian girl frowned. “Why not? Your family already fosters a lot of animals and you had to take care of Cloud too. We’re not letting do that for free,” she said as she forced the money into his hand. “I also have a box from the bakery as thank yous. And before you start arguing, I’m happy to give them to you. You and your family really helped us here.”

Claude accepted the box reluctantly and smiled at her eventually.

“Thank you, you’re as sweet as these pastries, you know?”

Marinette shoved him playfully, a smile on her lips.

“Well, we won’t bother you any longer. Plus, I think Cloud and Damian need some time alone,” she winked playfully, “we’ll see you on Monday!”

Claude waved at them. “Yeah, see ya!”

As they walked away, the blue-eyed girl took the puppy from Damian’s arms.

“Come on, let me have my dose of Cloud,” she grinned and hugged the dog tightly.

They went to a nearby park, where they finally let the dog on the ground and watched as she spent all her energy running around.

“Are we still meeting with Chat Noir tomorrow night?” asked Damian.

Marinette nodded, taking his hand in hers absently and rubbing circle with her thumb. “Yeah, we have to talk about our progress,” she sighed at the look the threw her, “yeah, I know, there isn’t a lot of progress, so we need to talk about what we’re going to do now.”

She put her head on his shoulder and smiled as she felt him kiss the crown of her head.

“I can’t wait for it to be over. I think I’m going to have a good, long cry when it’s finally over.”

“Can’t blame you, I bet you have a lot of buried feelings,” he breathed as he put his arm around her shoulders and brought her closer to him.

She scoffed. “You have no idea.”

They fell silent for a second, watching as Cloud tired herself out and came back to them, falling at their feet.

“Speaking of which,” she started again suddenly, “we’ll need to watch out for Alya and Nino.”

She didn’t see it, but she could guess his frown in his voice. “Why?”

She looked at him, raising an eyebrow. “I didn’t tell you?”

He smirked at her. “Tell me what, exactly?”

She groaned. “I can’t believe I forgot to tell you!” she took a deep breath, “Nino told me and Kim, before I came to Gotham, that he found his soulmate.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, oh. And he decided to wait until school starts again to tell her. So it could give him time to figure out how to tell her,” she mumbled, “so either of them could get akumatized.”

“I can easily understand why he needed so much time to figure out a way to tell her. There is no way to know how that harpy is going to react.”

She audibly gasped. “Damian!”

“What?” he shrugged, “that girl always reacts first and thinks later, and it always makes people very cautious when they have something sensitive to tell her.”

Marinette pursed her lips. It was true that Alya had a tendency to react violently sometimes.

Okay, a lot of time, but still.

“That’s just how she is,” she said in a small voice, trying to defend her friends.

Damian kissed her forehead. “I know. I’m not a fan of the girl, but she’s still a good friend to you. But I can already see how she’s going to hog all your time, now.”

The dark-haired girl let out a startled laugh. “So that’s what it’s all about! You’re jealous that I might spend more time with her.”

“Guilty,” he admitted, hiding his face between her neck and shoulder.

She smiled fondly, stroking his hair lovingly. “You don’t have to worry. Alya ditched me a lot of time to spend time with Nino, so she should understand that I want to spend time with my boyfriend as well.”

“She better.”

She laughed, her arms circling around his torso and bringing him closer to her. “Now, hold me tighter, I’m cold!”

He complied immediately.

Ladybug watched over Paris, City of lights. It was something she both loved and hated about this City. It was so bright during the night, offering a really nice view from the rooftops, but when you looked up to the night sky, you couldn’t see the stars. She could see some, like the three belt stars of Orion, but it wasn’t as beautiful as it was in the countryside.

Chat Noir wasn’t here yet. He was ten minutes late, actually, and she could feel Robin getting restless next to her. Nightwing had taken his notebook out, reviewing his notes, a frown on his face.

The red-clothed heroine checked her yoyo to see if there was any message from Chat Noir and was about to call him when she heard the familiar sound of his baton on the roof.

“Sorry, I’m late,” he apologized, sounding breathless, probably because he ran as fast as he could to get here. “I couldn’t get away from my father.”

Ladybug frowned. She didn’t know a lot of things about her partner’s life — what with secret identities and all that jazz — but he mentioned his father a few times, and from the few bits she got, the man seemed very controlling of his son.

Nightwing waved him off. “No worries there, but we should get started, you kids have school tomorrow, yeah?”

He looked sheepish at the look the three other heroes — or vigilante, in Robin’s case — threw at him.

The older man cleared his throat. “Right. Let’s get started.”

They all sat in a circle on the roof and Nightwing put his notebook in the middle, allowing the others to see his notes.

“So, we still don’t have a lead on who Hawkmoth could be. We tried interrogating former victims of akumas but no one could remember anything from their akumatization, so we didn’t get anything out of that.”

He crossed out the idea on the page.

“Then,” he continued, “we tried following the butterflies after they got purified, to see if they went back to their Miraculous, but they just disappear somewhere in the city. So, that’s out too.”

He paused then, looking at each of them.

“Now, there is something I’ve done recently that I haven’t told you yet.”

He took a tablet out of a bag next to him and played a video.

“That’s the day of the first Akuma,” Chat Noir mused as he watched Hawkmoth’s face, made of akumas, making his evil speech.

“Yeah. We got an idea of his face, but the mask is taking 90% of his face and it’s made of butterflies, so we can’t run a facial recognition. And we don’t have images of him when he appeared on Heroes’ Day since the journalist covering the event was among all the people akumatized that day.”

He paused, and Ladybug had a feeling that he was doing that on purpose, just to be dramatic.

“But,” he exclaimed, giving her reason, “what we do have on this video, is his voice.”

She gasped. “You analyzed it!”

Nightwing nodded, and continued after her, “and I ran it into the computer so it could compare it with voices from security cameras that Red Robin hacked, and from television and radio apparitions.”

Ladybug couldn’t contain her joy even when Robin’s hand on her knee — it couldn’t stop moving in her excitement — tried to keep her from getting too excited. “So do you have a result?!”

Nightwing sighed. “Now, that’s where it gets a bit more complicated. I have more than a thousand results.”

Ladybug visibly deflated at that, and she could see Chat Noir deflating too. “Oh.”

The older man smiled at her and put a hand on her shoulder, lightly squeezing it. “But that’s not bad news! All we have to do now is make a profile on Hawkmoth, and compare his voice with the people we think and compare the voice again with those persons.”

Chat Noir looked at them, frowning. “Can’t we run an analysis again on the thousand or so people?”

Robin shook his head. “The software is not perfect yet. It’s already a good thing it gave us only a thousand results.”

Nightwing nodded, a pen in his hand that she hadn’t noticed before. “Yeah, I was actually pleasantly surprised. Now, I need to know a few things. The butterflies that akumatize people. Are they real butterflies or do they come with the Miraculous?”

“Tikki told me that it could be both. The Butterfly Miraculous can create them, but it takes a lot of time. If the holder doesn’t want to spend his energy in creating them, he can corrupt real butterflies.”

Robin hummed next to her. “With the number of Akumas we have to fight, I’m willing to bet that he does both. What if the type of butterfly had an influence in the Akuma’s power and strength?”

Chat Noir frowned. “What? you think that the victims akumatized by butterflies coming from the Miraculous are more powerful than those akumatized by a corrupted butterfly?”

Robin smirked. “That’s exactly what I think.”

Ladybug’s eyes widened. She had never thought of that before. And that would explain why the Akumas were more powerful than before. Hawkmoth has decided to take the time to create some of his own.

“But where would he find butterflies?”

Nightwing showed her his tablet, where she could see a web page with several results of butterflies breeding in the countryside not too far from Paris.

Ladybug frowned at that and passed the tablet to her partner so he could see it. “Either he owns one of them or has actions in it.”

Robin nodded. “That means that Hawkmoth is a man with a lot of money.”

Nightwing beamed at that. “Yeah, so it cuts a lot of people out of our list. See? We’re getting somewhere! So he’s a rich guy, but what’s his motive?”

“To make a wish, obviously,” answered Chat Noir.

“But why does he want to make a wish? Why does one want to alter reality?” Nightwing asked, looking at each of them pointedly.

The cat-themed hero scoffed, “Because he’s an evil bastard?”

Robin rolled his eyes. “Except that. There must be a personal reason. For example, if you could make a wish, what would you do it for?” he asked, looking at everyone.

“I would do it if someone I loved died, I guess. I would want to bring them back, to see them again,” Ladybug whispered.

“Yeah, that would be a reason for me too,” breathed Chat Noir, arms crossed against his torso, looking deep in his thoughts.

“That would be the only reason I would be willing to take the risk of a wish too,” said Nightwing, noting something down in his notebook.

“And that’s the same for me,” he said, looking at Ladybug. “So we should look out for rich people who lost someone dear to them. A child, a spouse, a parent, a sibling… And in the last five years or so.”

As Nightwing noted everything down, Robin’s hand found its way in her hair and slightly tugged at it, getting her attention. “Didn’t you suspect Gabriel Agreste, once?”

Ladybug nodded, but Chat Noir was quicker to react. “But it’s not him!” he exclaimed, looking almost panicked, “he got akumatized a few years ago!”

The oldest among them hummed. “Yeah, but we don’t know the extent of his power. It’s possible he akumatized himself on purpose if he thought you guys were closing on him.”

Ladybug agreed with him. “He lost his wife a few years ago. He’s rich. He meets all the requirements.”

Suddenly, Chat Noir stood up, startling her. “No!” he yelled loudly, “Ladybug, we’ve already written him off. It’s not him.”

And without another word, Chat Noir left.

It’s Robin’s oldest brother comment that broke the silence.

“He sure does feel strongly about Gabriel Agreste. Giving that the man is a recluse and only interacts with two people in his life…” Nightwing said, staring at Ladybug, as if trying to communicate something with her.

Oh.

Chat Noir was Gabriel Agreste’s son.

Chat Noir was Adrien Agreste.

“Well, it’s gotten even more complicated now,” she sighed, rubbing her eyes with the palm of her hands.

Robin’s hand stroking her back was comforting.

“I’ll search for anything related to a butterfly breeding and run a comparison between Hawkmoth’s voice and Gabriel’s tomorrow. If it’s him, we’ll need a plan of action next, but we’ll see that once it’s confirmed.”

Nightwing then looked at her, taking her hand in his in a comfort that was so brotherly that it almost brought tears to her eyes.

“Tell me,” he started, “if Gabriel is Hawkmoth, and Adrien has a confirmation of it, what will he do?”

She would like to tell him that Chat Noir would help them. That he would fight Hawkmoth with them.

But then, she thought of times Adrien spoke of his mother. His love for her was obvious, and he had hope that she would reappear one day, since he didn’t know anything about her disappearance.

Ladybug sighed, shaking slightly and leaned on Robin’s side, in a side hug.

“Honestly, I don’t know.”

Tag List:

@bigpicklebananatree​ @animegirlweeb​ @crazylittlemunchkin​ @northernbluetongue​ @cutechip​ @justafanwarrior​ @iloontjeboontje​ @resignedcatservant @maribat-is-lifeblood​ @i-like-fairytail-and-stuff​ @toodaloo-kangaroo​ @mikantsume​ @dast218​ @amayakans​ @zestyzealot​ @lunarwolfspn​ @corabeth11​ @marinettepotterandplagg​ @olynix​ @aestheticnpoetic​ @hot-neighbour-nextdoor​ @thehufflepuffranger-blog​ @k-poplunardreams​ @tis-i-beanbandit​ @bluesimani​ @laurcad123​

#maribat #daminette #maridami #damian x marinette #ml x dc #mlb x dc #miraculous x dc

[shemakesmusic-uk]

Alt-pop newcomer LVRA (pronounced loo-rah, real name Rachel Lu) has shared her first new track of 2021, ‘DEAD’. Following up on 2020’s debut EP LVCID, she explains: “There’s a unique power you gain when you stop caring about what people think of you. It’s an ongoing battle, though, and ‘DEAD’ is about the conflict between the fantasy of not caring and how you feel in reality. The video captures that, with a version of myself who has her shit together and another that is fighting to survive.The use of red represents fear in the human condition, but in Chinese culture it also symbolises happiness. One rarely comes without the other.” The track – a cultural mix that matches LVRA’s heritage with bleeding edge ultra HD pop – is the first taster of a second EP, which is set to follow later this summer. You can check out an Oscar McNab (Lacuna Common, Oscar Lang). directed video above. [via Dork]

Los Angeles artist Wallice follows debut single 'Punching Bag' with new coming of age anthem, '23'. Wallice finds herself caught between two places on fresh cut, '23'. “Too old to be a runaway”, but also too young to consider herself as grown up, the 22-year old yearns for a past that still has not happened yet. Working with producer David Marinelli since her return to California, Wallice has crafted a sound that is unique without taking itself too seriously. An angst-driven remonstration at the powerlessness of her age, '23' is also the clearest stamp of her musical identity to date. The expression of this purgatory is a cathartic garage-rock headbanger complemented beautifully by Wallice’s playful lyrics. “I just can't wait to be / all grown up and 23,” she admits in the song’s irresistible chorus. “Tell me what is wrong with me / I miss my Ohio fake ID”. In artfully portraying the limbo state of the age, Wallice describes the events in her life that have led to her own disaffection. “It’s hard not to compare your own professional success to that of your similarly aged peers. I dropped out of university in New York after studying Jazz Voice for a year, and my dad was VERY disappointed, to say the least, so it was hard not to feel like a loser in that sense. “The specific age 23 doesn’t have any milestones associated with it, but it’s more the idea of just looking forward to the future,” Wallice continues on the meaning of the track. "Much like how people ‘reset’ every new year, it’s comparable to be ‘older and wiser’ with each birthday, but instead of constantly looking to the future, it is important to be happy with where you are”. [via Line Of Best Fit]

Coach Party have shared their new single 'Everybody Hates Me'. The Isle of Wight group are gearing up to release their incoming EP, with After Party pitting their potent indie pop influences against bittersweet lyricism. Out shortly, the EP is teased by new thumper 'Everybody Hates Me', with Coach Party adding a neat gloss to their guitar pop sound. Out now, 'Everybody Hates Me' comes equipped with a neat video steered by Daniel Broadley. Vocalist Jess Eastwood comments: “‘Everybody Hates Me’ isn’t a metaphor for anything; it’s literally about those times when you convince yourself that everyone, including your best friends don’t actually like you, and your self-confidence is so low that you don’t even blame them. Disguise that sentiment in an up-beat singalong, and there you have the third single from our new record. The video is a direct extension of the song. It swings between the insecurities of feeling like you’re not good enough amongst your friends, and the sense of unity you get from those same people when you finally wake up from your rut. Everyone feels that way from time to time, but you gotta remember that sometimes your irrational self is going to take over. And when it does, try to remember that you’re awesome, and your friends really are your friends.” [via Clash]

Pussy Riot have gone hyperpop on their latest song 'Toxic'. The Dorian Electra collaboration features glitched out production by Dylan Brady of 100 gecs and tackles a relationship gone bad. Written, directed, and edited by Pussy Riot’s Nadya Tolokonnikova, the music video features jarring, bloody imagery matching Brady’s production. “Care about yourself, cherish your mental health, and stay away from relationships that poison you!” Tolokonnikova writes in the YouTube description. “Amen.” In the song’s lyrics, Tolokonnikova tells off an ex. “You are my daily poison so annoying,” she sings. “You’re even more toxic than my employer.” The hook continues the theme. “This combo is deadly — ’cause we used to be friendly,” Electra laments. “And now my heart is a weapon / You made me… toxic.” [via Consequence of Sound]

Baby Queen has dropped a brand new track, ‘These Drugs’. Bella Latham’s second new track of the year – following up on the anthemic ‘Raw Thoughts’ – she explains in an Instagram post: “This is a story I really needed to tell you and I didn’t know how to for a long time. When I first wrote this song, I honestly didn’t think I was going to be allowed to release it or that releasing it would be a particularly good idea. It just felt really important and that’s all I’ve ever wanted music to be; so I knew I had to share it with you.I was in a very bad place at the time… very depressed and convinced I wasn’t a good person and didn’t deserve good things. Life is different now. I’m happy. I’ve learnt that the antidote to my misery is gratitude and caring about myself even when I don’t want to, until it becomes a habit. It’s natural to look for escapism but there’s more freedom in working to build a life you like… and by that I literally just mean learning to love yourself. You, with all your scars and all your regrets, are home to an actual life! You’ve been through so much and you’ve come out the other side stronger because of it – it’s remarkable really. You’ve got to invite the sad parts of yourself in to have a tea party with you. Don’t ignore them and cover them up. If you don’t look at them, they’ll make themselves seen! You are so worthy of love and I hope that if you don’t see that yet, you will learn to in time. Anyways guys,” she finishes, “this is all very intense. I love you very much and I hope you can understand and relate in some way.” [via Dork]

Greentea Peng has shared her new single 'Nah It Ain’t The Same'. The UK neo-soul voice is an outstanding talent, someone who pushes herself further into that hip-hop / jazz nexus with each release. Produced by Earbuds, new single 'Nah It Ain't The Same' is out now, one that reflects the chemistry she has with her live band The Seng Seng Family. Dipping into drum 'n' bass, her vocals have a calming, beatific feel, with 'Nah It Ain't The Same' tugging at matters personal. She comments: “Deliberations of a (hu) MAN, subject to the pendulum's swing, I give you ‘Nah It Aint The Same’ off my album MAN MADE. An expression and exploration of my utter confusion and inner conflicts amidst shifting paradigms.” Greentea Peng stars in the new video, with Machine Operated sculpting the video. [via Clash]

renforshort has debuted a brand new single, ‘virtual reality’. The first taster of a forthcoming second EP, the track sees her “connect” with Kellen Pomeranz (Pom Pom), Jesse Fink and Beabadoobee collaborator Pete Robertson. “’virtual reality’ is a song that tackles many topics. But at its core, it really is about anxiety, routine, boredom, isolation, loneliness, and fear,” she explains. “I think a lot of people have a very unhealthy relationship with technology because it’s never really been restricted enough to consider mental health and overall health, and that has fucked so many people up, now more than ever. Ever since I was young, social media has played a major role in my mental wellbeing, and I became so accustomed to it, it became a part of my routine and it came before everything else. The moment I wake up, almost instinctively, I check my phone. Depending on what I see in the morning, basically determines how I’m gonna feel for the rest of the day. I hate it. But I can’t stop. And what’s most ironic about this all is you’re likely going to read this on social media or listen to the song on some sort of electronic device…” [via Dork]

Flock of Dimes has shared the second single from her forthcoming album Head of Roses, out April 2 via Sub Pop. Following recent single, 'Two', 'Price of Blue' is another standout from Wasner’s second solo LP, an album that showcases her ability to embrace new levels of vulnerability, honesty and openness, combined with the self-assuredness that comes with a decade-plus career as a songwriter, producer, multi-instrumentalist and prolific collaborator. It comes accompanied by an unearthly new video filmed in black and white, co-directed by Wasner with Graham Tolbert. Wasner says: “This song is about trying, and failing, to connect. It’s about the ways in which, despite our best efforts, we misunderstand each other, and become so attached to stories that we’re unable to see the truth that’s right in front of us. And it’s about the invisible mark that another person can leave on your body, heart and mind long after their absence. It can be difficult to make sense of the memory of your experience when the reality on the surface is always shifting—when the story you’re telling, or the story you’ve been told, unravels, leaving you with a handful of pieces and no idea how they used to fit together.”

Berlin-based indie-soul five-piece, People Club, announce their new EP Take Me Home, which is due May 7 and the band are sharing the title-track and new video. The title track 'Take Me Home' is a song about the realisation of mortality in old age and the cynicism that often plights the elderly after losing their loved ones and being left alone with their regrets. It is accompanied by a music video shot by long standing collaborator, Felix Spitta. Speaking of the process the band say, “Once again we worked with our very talented friend, Felix Spitta, who also shot the video for our last single Francine.  We basically spent a day fooling around at his house with a smoke machine and an old tape TV camera with a red filter.  The result is hazy and disorientating, just like this year has been so far.”

Introducing MARY., the dreamy alter-ego of musician and songwriter Stef T. The self-produced debut track, ‘Day to Day’, interlaces elements of electro-pop and R&B with a voice that enchants, along with an official video filmed, edited and directed by David Risdon and Charlie Rose Creative. Reading like a page in a diary, ‘Day to Day’ offers a candid and emotionally raw glance at being overlooked as a woman in a man’s world. She is put together, glamorous and poised on the outside, but on the inside she is simmering like a pot ready to boil over, fed-up and on the brink of snapping. Speaking of the track, Stef T explains, “’Day to Day’ is a reflection on what it is to be a woman in a role where you are always unseen; constantly giving yet never receiving. As woman, we are often undervalued for our day to day work in all aspects - as mothers, in relationships, in our careers; having to push extra hard to get the basic recognition and thanks that we are entitled to. This song is a commentary of a large part of my life where I settled, sacrificed and worked, only to be used and taken for granted. It is about learning to survive a toxic relationship, discover your own individual worth again and reclaim the power that you gave away to someone else. Producing this song myself is the only thing that made sense in context with the intention of MARY. as a project. She is an entirely self made, independent woman, who does it all and doesn't need a man to confirm that she's doing a good job. This is something I have personally struggled with, so I created the MARY. persona to feel more empowered in my storytelling as an artist, in an industry without a large visible number of female-identifying producers.”

Los Angeles based dream pop trio Tashaki Miyaki have just released a single and video of the title song from their forthcoming second album, Castaway, which will be released on April 23 via Metropolis Records. Singer, drummer and producer Paige Stark states that the song “is about the challenges of romantic love and how we are all bad at it in one way or another. The idea of a castaway in all this is that no one understands the relationship except the people in it, so you really are stuck on an island alone together there. Maybe you make it back to the mainland, or maybe you stay on the island.” Stark also shot the Sofia Coppola-inspired video on film, adding: "I wanted to tap into all the feelings that can come up in love relationships: anger, sadness, loneliness, vulnerability, stillness, joy, romance, longing. The actress in it has a beautifully expressive face and I've known her for a long time. I knew we would be able to create those moments together. I wanted it to feel like the camera was her lover, capturing her in various private moments, moods and feelings.”

With her Vanilla Shell EP celebrating its one-year anniversary last month, Danish-Chilean composer Molina is back with another abbreviated record in the form of the new single 'Cold,' featuring vocalist Jonas Bjerre, arriving with a pair of B-sides. The brief collection of songs continues her simultaneous journey inward toward the roots of Chilean music and outward into her own unique vision of the future. The project lands with a video for the A-side, which dreams up bizarre fantasy iconography in the tradition of Grimes and Björk to complement her subdued take on these artists’ out-there recordings. Blending ambiguous electronic sounds with the familiar drone of cello and Bjerre’s backing vocals, the track’s distinct persona may have more in common with the experimental soundscapes of artists like Jenny Hval or Julia Holter. [via Flood]

Maisie Peters has debuted her brand new single, ‘John Hughes Movie’. Described as the first single from her soon to be announced debut album, it’s a song about unrequited love, inspired by the legendary film producer and his classic coming-of-age teen comedies like The Breakfast Club and Sixteen Candles. The track comes alongside a video co-written by Maisie and director Louis Bhose (Loyle Carner, Arlo Parks, Lewis Capaldi). Maisie explains: “I wrote ‘John Hughes Movie’ when I was 17 about a house party that I had gone to. It’s a really honest depiction of being a hopeless, melodramatic teenager, being awkward and drunk and getting your heart broken by people you don’t even remember anymore. John Hughes films encapsulate that foolish romantic energy of high school and everything that I, a small town English wannabe Molly Ringwald wanted to be, but was not.” [via Dork]

Chloe x Halle have shared the music video for their song 'Ungodly Hour.' The video was debuted on Wedneday night's episode of The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon and shows the Bailey sisters going underwater for a sci-fi-style visual filled with choreography and elaborate adventures at the bottom of the ocean. Watch the Alfred Marroquín-directed video above. [via The FADER]

South London's Josie Man has returned with sentimental new single 'Cuts & Bruise', marking her first release of 2021. 'Cuts & Bruises' follows October 2020's 'Grow' single, and is accompanied by a Andrea Mae-directed video that shows couples enjoying tender moments, including Josie Man and her boyfriend. [via Line Of Best Fit]

Jessie Ware has shared a new short film for her song 'Remember Where You Are'. Her album What's Your Pleasure? arrived last year, a disco-fuelled missile that presented some much-needed good vibes amid lockdown. The songwriter returns to the record for her song 'Remember Where You Are', a soulful and uplifting slice of UK songwriting. There's now a full video for the song and it's steered by BAFTA winning director Dominic Savage. Starring British actress Gemma Arterton, it opens on Valentine's Day and finds the star wandering through deserted London streets. A glimpse of hope and renewal, it taps into the growing feeling that this time, lockdown might be coming to a permanent end. "It was a real pleasure to collaborate with Jessie and Gemma on this short film that is inspired by Jessie Ware’s beautiful music. It was also inspired by the real feeling that was felt when we filmed in the deserted streets of eerily strange lockdown London on a Saturday night/Sunday morning,” Dominic said. “The feelings and emotions in the film are a true reflection of what that felt like, and what this time invokes. Sadness, nostalgia, pain and defiance. But when we climbed Primrose Hill and the sun started to rise above the city, there was real hope and joy for a future that will surely be ours. Listening to Jessie’s music. There is no doubt of that." Jessie adds... "This song has always meant a lot to me and I was determined for other people to hear it and for it to be single. I am so touched by how many people have embraced this song, particularly when it's one of your favourite actresses and an acclaimed film director. Working with Gemma, Dominic and their team has been an absolute joy. To have them realise my song with a beautiful ode to London and the longing for human touch and interaction couldn't be more of a compliment. It's a truly cherished piece of work." [via Clash]

Jaguar Jonze has shared her new single and video 'CURLED IN' ahead of the release of her second EP ANTIHERO on April 16, both via Nettwerk Records. 'CURLED IN' presents all her best qualities at its outset. From the track’s rip-roaring, slicing guitar to her perfectly forceful, omnipresent vocals, 'CURLED IN' is a pure cathartic release. "Tear me apart, just tear me apart," she all but demands: "I've never seen wrong be done right." She's fulfilling her simplest needs, and it's freeing. "It's a bit of a twist for me to be a masochist." As a survivor of abuse, these words' unafraid power is all too apparent and an engaging statement to hear expressed.

Following the release of eclectic and impressive debut singles 'ASOS,' 'Right Time,' and 'Papercut,' rising left-of-center pop singer and songwriter Dava returns with a fresh and bold new single 'New Ceilings' available now via Sony Music's Disruptor Records. The moody anti-pop record was co-written by Dava and Mike Adubato (Del Water Gap, Grace VanderWaal) who also produced the track, and is the latest off the Los Angeles-based musician's forthcoming debut EP, Sticky, due out later this year. On the inspiration behind her new single, Dava shares, "This song was written about survival and staying true to yourself. I was having a hard time financially after moving to LA and my phone was shut off while on my way to this session. I was upset with myself for prioritizing music when I really needed the money from driving Uber to stay afloat." She continues, "The day I wrote 'New Ceilings' I was angry and I wanted a song that felt empowering and validated all the work I had put in up to that point. I ended up choosing different songs for my project but when I revisited this one year later, I felt it needed to be heard because of how authentically it embodies my struggle."

London-based Fifi Rong, a multi-talented avant-pop songstress, has shared the video for her stunning single, ‘Another Me’. Directed by Rok Pat, the video for ‘Another Me’ is stylistically simplistic, as Fifi Rong uses her own body as a medium of art, painting herself and inviting the simple imagery of waterside reeds and plants. A tranquil mysticism embraces the single as Fifi Rong acts as a gentle siren, luring the unsuspecting in yet known the inevitable outcome of the relationship. Speaking of the concept behind the single and video, Fifi Rong tells us: “In any doomed romance, timing is always mysteriously wrong. This is my first full CGI music video and it visually portrays the elusive nature of the character surrounding the key message: 'you won't find another me'. The undertone of the song displays a sense of pride and confidence in the character’s melancholy. Dressed in nothing but petals, I wanted my character to symbolise purity, nature, truthfulness, vulnerability and the divine feminine form. Acting as a rotating statue, I wanted to mark the passing of time and seasons as if a unique and lonely piece of art on display.”

#lvra #wallice #videos of the week #coach party #baby queen #pussy riot #dorian electra #greentea peng #renforshort #flock of dimes #people club #mary. #tashaki miyaki #molina #maisie peters #chloe x halle #josie man #jessie ware #jaguar jonze #dava #fifi rong

[tragicallywicked]

jazz taking care of renesmee

I had no clue what circumstances lead me to be babysitting my adoptive niece, but there I was. Alice had told me in the morning that she would need to head to Seattle with Bella for some foreign reason. I had tried to eye Edward about it but raised his arms at me as it seemed he too was involved in the making as he was tagging along with the girls.  I didn't want to be rude and ask about Jacob and give them the impression that I didn't want to take care of Renesmee.

"He's actually going to be in a meeting with his pack." Edward read it even if I had chosen not to ask. It usually would befall on Rosalie, who would gladly take the task, but she was out hunting with Emmett and Esme. Carlisle, too, was unavailable at the hospital.

"I just don't have that much experience entertaining kids." I clarified, but Alice was already beaming. I was on board, obviously, and she knew of if ahead of everyone else. "Any suggestions?"

"She loves books, you could watch some shows with her. Just keep it on her age range." Bella suggested calmly, surprisingly happy. I wondered even further what was that all about.

Nodding convincedly, Alice tiptoed to peck my cheek. "It'll be great, Jazz." She had seen it, so I could trust her on that.

There I was, cooking Renesmee's dinner while she instructed me exactly how her mother did it for her. It always impressed me how Renesmee was attentive to her surroundings, though it felt correct given how her gift worked. She endured so much for her age, with the Volturi coming after us, but she was as brave as parents. Now Renesmee was starting to look about ten years old, and we knew soon enough her appearance would catch up to all of us and stop, but she was still just a young child. Even with all she had been through and rapid growth, I viewed her that way.

Even if I wasn't as close as Rosalie was to Renesmee, I had always been there to protect her as I would any family member. Alice hadn't been keen on her until almost Renesmee had been born because she worried for Bella. But after that and our search for Nahuel, I knew Renesmee had only brought happiness to our family.

"So, do you know why your parents and aunt ditched us?" I asked her, an eyebrow raised. Renesmee smiled shyly. Oh, she knew it too. "Come on now, Ness. Am I the only one who doesn't know?"

The room was quickly anxious, but I sent a wave of calmness toward her. She chuckled, and her hand reached out to touch my arm. I saw the image crystal clear like it was happening right in front of me.

Alice waltz to Bella, whispering something before the two came to Renesmee herself. "Sweetheart, I'll have to make a day trip with aunt Alice and dad. Do you want me to leave you at Charlie's, or can ask aunt Rose to stay here with you?"

Renesmee was silent for a moment, and then she spoke, "Can I stay with uncle Jasper?"

Both women were surprised, but Alice nodded almost instantly.

The vision disappeared as Renesmee pulled her hand away, and I frowned even further, surprisedly.

"Well, thank you, Ness," I said and she nodded. I felt the ambient getting extraordinarily calm; I could appreciate that mood.

"Aunt Rose really needed to hunt and we never hang out." She said simply, then I felt her curiosity.

"What is it that you want to ask?"

Renesmee thought for a second and then she finally spoke it out loud. "I wanted to know how did you meet aunt Alice?"

Alice and Renesmee had grown a special bond ever since we returned. Life got back to normal in our households, so I could understand why the curiosity since she knew so little about me at the end.

"She found me actually."

"Of course, she did." I laughed with her and Renesmee took a seat at the counter while I platted her food.

"I was in Philadelphia and got inside a diner to run from a storm. You know it doesn't really matter to us, but humans would find it odd, of course." Shrugging, I carried on, "she was waiting there for me, obviously. She came up to me and told me I had kept her waiting a long time."

"Sounds like aunt Alice. Were you surprised?" That was an understatement, but I nodded.

"I told her I was sorry and she took my hand. I have never felt so hopeful before that." With her plate served, I placed it in front of her, fishing the cutlery inside the drawers.

"What happened after?"

"We talked for a long time, she told me about her powers and the things she had seen. And I told her about what I had lived and the powers I had as well." I explained as she took the first few bites on her food. "I know it's not Bella's food, but that any good?"

Renesmee beamed, "It's great, thanks, uncle Jasper."

"Anytime, kiddo."

"What year did you meet?" She continued the inquiry and I smiled.

"Nineteen forty-eight," I remembered like it was yesterday, the day everything changed. "We met Carlisle, Esme and Rosalie in 1950."

"What about dad and uncle Emmett?"

"It was the same week, but a few days after. They were out hunting when we came over." It had been Alice's strategy as if to not alarm the strongest in the coven then and have us joining the family become battle. "Aunt Alice and I got married two years later."

"That's really nice. I know how much you love her." I nodded, observant kid, or maybe I was simply too obvious.

"She taught me how to be better, I was not always this nice uncle." Chuckling softly, I watched as she shook her head.

“Dad said we all have difficult times but it gets better."

I knew from Alice that Renesmee had been struggling with her hunger for human blood as of late, so perhaps one of the reasons she wanted to speak with me in the first place was that. It was well known that I was the last to join in the family's habits. Even Bella had an easier time controlling herself, the most impressive I had ever seen.

"What's bothering you, Ness?"

"I just don't know how to not think about blood sometimes." I knew what that was like. "Mom is way better at this. She just tells me to focus, to concentrate. But I can't really. Not like her."

"She's not wrong, but her skills are beyond me. I've met several newborns, none were like Bella. What I found that helped me was thinking of the moments I was something different, better. For example, when I'm with your aunt. If the thirst feels like it's on edge, I search for my happiest memories. Helps me remember what my focus is."

Renesmee thought about it quietly. I understood she was searching for a memory when the room was suddenly filled with the most utter relief and joy. I raised a brow and she held out her hand. When I took it, our family's image and the other clans at the clearing, defeating the Volturi, filled my eyes again. I gasped, smiling at the memory seen from another angle. Her eyes moving through each member of our family with cheer happiness. I saw myself by Alice smiling with relief, Emmett and Rosalie with a hold of each other, Carlisle brushing Esme's cheek, Bella and Edward involving my niece in a hug, and Jacob right there at their sight.

I was back to the current moment and the room was all filled with complete calm and comfort. "That's a great memory to access, yes," I suggested then with a nod. "Whenever you feel like you need that extra concentration, go to it. And you can always count on me to help calm you down, alright?"

"Us freaks, we have to help each other." She added with a laugh and I nodded. I had seen Edward say that more than once.

"Exactly. Now eat up so we can find a Disney movie to watch, huh?"

"Can we watch Mulan?" She beamed and I nodded starting to clear out the dishes.

"Anything you want, kiddo."

Send me a Jalice prompt

#i added some jalice there too haha #jasper hale #renesmee cullen #twilight #prompt #fanfic #short fic #alice cullen #bella swan #edward cullen #jasper withlock #Anonymous #jalice #mine #twilight renaissance #the twilight renaissance #twilight fanfiction

[angelsandacceptance]

After School Special

“So?” Dean asks. 

Sam shrugs. “I think she's telling the truth. I mean, the way she talked about being there mentally but not physically -- kind of sounds like demonic possession to me.”

“Kind of?” Chase asks. “How is it kind of a demon possession?”

“She didn't see any black smoke or smell sulfur,” Sam explains. 

“Maybe it's not a demon. I mean, kids can be vicious,” Dean says. 

“Yeah, they’re terrifying,” Harley says. 

“You were one of those terrifying ones, Harley,” Chase laughs. “I’ve heard the stories.”

“Well, I mean, we're already here. Might as well check out the school,” Sam suggests. 

“Right, the school,” Dean says shortly. 

“What?” Sam asks.

“Truman High, home of the Bombers,” Dean says with distaste. 

“What’s your point?” Chase asks. 

“I mean, we went there, like... for a month a million years ago. Why are you so jazzed to go back?” Dean asks.

“We were only there for a month, so why are you so opposed?” Chase asks. 

“Because it’s school and we have a connection to it. Why should I want to go back?”

“It’s worth looking into,” Sam points out. 

“All right, well, what's our cover? FBI? Homeland Security? Swedish exchange students?” Dean asks. 

“Yes, Dean, because you, a thirty year old grown ass man, can pass as a high school student. From Sweden.”

“Do you even know Swedish?” Harley asks.

“Don’t worry,” Sam says. “I have an idea.”

“That’s worrisome,” Chase says. 

“How?” Sam asks defensively. 

“Because it’s you. And I don’t trust either of you,” Chase says, pointing at the boys. 

“Do you trust me?” Harley asks.

Chase regards her with a cautious look. “Only on Tuesdays.”

“So, Sammy, what’s this idea of yours?” Harley asks.

Sam shoots Harley an annoyed look. “It’s Sam. You know it’s Sam.” He shakes his head. “Whatever. So, get this.”

***

The Impala drives up in front of a large school, Truman High School boldly proclaimed on the building’s entrance. Dean, Chase, and Sam climb out of the back, backpacks tugged around shoulders, wary looks on their faces. 

“Thanks, Dad,” Dean says, taking lead and walking in front of the younger Winchesters. “You two got your books?” Dean asks them. “Lunch? Butterfly knife?”

“Yeah, Dean,” Sam says, rolling his eyes. 

“You two are being quiet. You okay?”

“Sure,” Sam says at the same time Chase answers, “Better than your face.”

“My face is beautiful, okay?”

“Sure.”

“Seriously, you okay?”

“Sure,” Sam repeats with emphasis. 

“Sammy…” Dean starts. 

“I mean, look, this is the third school we've been to this year, and it's only November. I'm just sick of always being the new kid.”

“It does kind of suck,” Chase agrees. “I’m never able to make friends. No one wants to be friends with the freak who doesn’t know how to keep quiet, and if they do, I can’t keep contact with them longer than a couple weeks.”

“Who needs friends when you have us?” Dean smirks.

“You’re boys. I can’t exactly talk to you about all my problems, Dean.”

“And people pick on me!” Sam exclaims. 

“You'll be fine. If anyone gives you any trouble, you let me know. Relax. Dad said this hunt will take him two weeks, tops. As soon as he gets back, we're out of here.”

“To another school. Awesome,” Sam says, tugging his backpack tighter to his body. 

Once separating from her brothers as they each go to their individual classes, Chase finds herself alone in front of the classroom, twenty pairs of eyes staring her down. Judging her. Inspecting her.

God, she hates teenagers. 

“Is there anything you want to tell us about yourself, Char-”

“Chase. My name is Chase Winchester. Please address me as such.”

“Of course,” the teacher hesitates, unused to being talked to by students like that, but she continues quickly. “Well, go on and tell us three facts about yourself.”

Chase turns to the class, a half smile on her face. “Hi! I’m Chase. I like learning but hate school, love cats, and fighting.”

“What kind of fighting?” A boy in the back of the class asks. 

Chase looks to the teacher out of the corner of her eye, only to be encouraged by a wide smile. 

“Y’know,” Chase mumbles, suddenly shy. “Like fist fighting and shooting and stuff.”

“Shooting? Like guns?”

‘Great, Chase, go ahead and label yourself the freak. Why didn’t you say something normal?’

“Uh,” Chase stalls for time. “Yeah? My dad takes me and my brothers to the shooting range.”

“That’s great, Chase! Go ahead and take your seat.”

Chase does so quickly, face slightly red from embarrassment, and pulls out a notebook, hastily busying herself so she can avoid questions and eye contact. 

***

Harley’s students enter the class room. “Hello everyone, I’m Ms. Wyllt. Today we will be joined by Ms. Scourie and her 3rd period Creative Writing class. You’ll be grouped together in fours, and yes, you can choose your partners.”

A wave of excitement rushed through the class. “You’ll be writing your own unique scenes and acting them out! This project will be due two weeks from now.”

A knock comes from the classroom door, and Harley goes to open it revealing Chase and her class. Everyone enters the theatre room and Chase and Harley go off on their own.

“We’re like the best teachers ever,” Harley says, seeing best friends pair up immediately.

“We are,” Chase agrees.

***

High school was an interesting place for Harley. It was simultaneously the worst and best years of her life. She was depressed and suspended from school, but she found someone who she would give anything, just for her to be happy. She found a daughter. The light of her life and her best friend in the universe.

She found a wonderful friend group who she would die for. Discovered music and made many a memory. At this specific moment she was remembering staying the night at Adina’s.

They were in her basement, Adina was giving Harley a stick and poke of a treble clef.

“Does that hurt?” Adina asks.

“Honestly, this is the most relaxed I’ve ever been. Maybe it’s the sauna, maybe it’s being out of the house, or maybe it’s you. I don’t really care, I might fall asleep before you finish,” Harley responds.

Adina laughs.

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“I’m adopting you. You are now my child,” Harley says mostly serious with a hint of joking.

“Okay?”

“I’m serious, you are the light of my life and you make being alive worth it.”

“Aww, thanks!”

“Any time.”

***

Winchesters and Co. sat in the teacher’s lounge eating sloppy joes.

“So, Harley and I are the best teachers.”

“Why, what’d you do?” Dean asks, mouth full.

“Dean, really?” Chase asks. “You’re a pig.”

“Sounds like one at night too,” Sam laughs. 

“I mean not really,” Harley defends.

“Yeah!” Dean exclaims. “It’s Chase that’s bad!”

“I’m not that bad!”

“None of you are bad or I’ve just gone deaf?” Harley says unsure.

“Deaf. Definitely deaf,” Sam says. “These two are both awful.”

Chase sticks her tongue out at her younger brother. 

“So, Sam, did you find any sulfur?” Harley asks.

“I've been over the entire school twice. No sulfur,” Sam answers.

“No sulfur, no demon. No demon, no case,” Dean states.

“I don't know. Maybe I was wrong.”

“Well, it happens to the best of us. I say we hit the road, huh?”

“Fine by me,” Harley adds.

***

“How’s the nonviolence school assembly going?” Sam asks, as though joking.

Chase smacks his arm. 

“What?” Sam asks. “Too soon?”

“Yes, Sam. Too soon.”

“Apparently, shoving a kid's arm into a Cuisinart is not a ‘healthy display of anger.’ So, the kid had ectoplasm leaking out his ear?” Dean asks. 

“Which only comes from a really pissed off ghost,” Chase says.

“It’s got to be ghost possession,” Harley concludes. 

“Yeah, but that’s pretty rare,” Dean hesitates. 

“Yeah, but it happens. I mean, they get angry enough, they can take control of a person's body,” Sam says. 

“Alright, so what, we got a ghost in the building?” Dean asks. 

“Yeah, but where? I mean, there's no EMF. Maybe we could find out who it is, at least. You know, check and see if somebody died bloody around here or something.”

“Way ahead of you. I had to break into the principal's office to get this. Oh, and FYI, three of the cheerleaders are legal. Guess which ones,” Dean smirks, pulling a paper out of his pocket. 

“No,” Sam deadpans.

“Oh!” Chase exclaims. “Is the cute black haired one with the hazel-y green eyes?”

“Yes,” Dean smiles, giving Chase a high five. 

“Knew it.”

“I love you,” Harley laughs.

“Why thank you,” Chase and Dean chorus. They turn to each other. “She was talking to me! No, she wasn’t. Yes, she was!” They turn back to Harley. “Harley?”

“I love when y’all talk at the same time.”

“That doesn’t answer our question,” They both say. They turn to each other again, but say nothing, opting to stick their tongues out at each other instead. 

“Are you sure I’m the youngest?” Sam sighs.

“Pretty sure, Sammy,” Dean says. 

“Moving on,” Sam replies. 

“So, there was only one death on campus. It was a suicide back in '98. Some kid named Barry Cook,” Dean notices Sam’s face fall, “What?”

“I knew him. How did he die?”

“He slit his wrists in the first-floor girls' bathroom.”

Harley swats Dean on the arm, “Even I have more tact.”

“And that’s saying something,” Chase mentions. 

“Right where the chick got swirly-ed to death, exactly. So, what? This ghost is possessing nerds?”

“And using them to go after bullies,” Harley adds.

“Well, is that something Barry would do?” Chase asks. 

“Barry had a hard time,” Sam says. 

“Didn’t we all?” Chase asks.

***

Chase walks down the hallway, shooting a smile at her brother, Sam, who is walking with a boy his age. He waves back to her. ‘At least he made a friend,’ she thinks to herself.

Unlike her at that moment. Ever since her slip up in her first period, all of the girls avoided her, and the boys only talked to her if they wanted to make fun of her. Well, for the most part.

“So, are you sure you don’t want to go out sometime?” a boy in her science class, (Lucas?) asks her.

“For the last time, no. I’m not interested,” Chase says, opening her locker and putting her books away. She grabs her textbooks for the next class, pointedly ignoring Lucas (Definitely Lucas, Chase thinks). 

Lucas grabs her wrist, pulling her towards him. “C’mon, one date.”

“I said no. You have one second to let go of me.”

“Not until you say yes.”

“One,” Chase says. Lucas has enough time to narrow his eyes in confusion before Chase’s fist meets his face.

***

“You punched him?” The vice principal asks.

“Yes,” Chase responds, not missing a single beat. 

“And you say the only thing he had been doing was holding your wrist? Because he wanted to get your attention?” He looks down at the written report of the situation, which both students had to write.

“No,” Chase says, confused. “He wasn’t just holding my wrist. He was touching me without my consent. And he had my attention. He just didn’t like my answer.”

“You could have pulled away.”

“I tried to, but-”

“I’m sorry, Miss Winchester, but violence is not the response to unwanted attention. I know you’re new here, but this is your only warning. If something like this happens again, you’ll be suspended. For right now, however, you have detention everyday for two weeks and you have to have your guardian sign this copy of the report.”

“But this report says I punched him, but doesn’t say what he did.”

“Because what he did was not enough to warrant a report. What you did was.”

“Bullshit.”

“Language. Last warning. Suspension is on the line. Now, go.”

***

“Hey,” Harley greets her mom.

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“You got suspended.”

“That’s bullshit. I’m suicidal, that’s not exactly against the rules.”

“You did mention jumping down the stairwell.”

“I know, but it might not kill me. I want to know I won’t come back.”

“Claire,” Harley’s mom sighs.

“I just want to be done. I’m so tired of living.”

“I know.”

“What’s wrong with me? I have so little empathy. Or sympathy? Whichever one it is. And the voices never shut up always, always, always telling me to kill, kill, kill. And I want to. I want to hurt people. To see them scream. I want to watch the light leave their eyes and hear that final breath escape. I want to feel the warmth of their blood across my skin.”

“They’re just thoughts, Claire.”

“They’re not though. They’re voices and feelings. They’re primal urges that I have so much trouble controlling. They’re proof I’m a monster.”

“You aren’t a monster.”

“Then why do you insist on me eating raw steak instead of buying me blood?”

“Because drinking blood is evil.”

“But I need to do it to survive. So doesn’t that make me evil?”

“No.”

***

The four hunters, each pair in their own vehicle, drive to the graveyard where they know the remains of Barry Cook lie. The air is thick with tension in the Impala, while the girls don’t think much of the situation. 

“So, after this, you want to get pie?” Chase asks.

“Umm… Duh?” Harley answers.

“Do you want to invite the boys or do you want to avoid Dean still?”

“I think Dean and I are fine, I mean he hasn’t said anything since we talked it over.”

“That’s good. I was about to suggest couple’s therapy.”

“We aren’t a couple.”

“Close enough,” Chase waves her hand, shrugging. “Anyway, we’re almost there. I don’t know about you, but I don't want to dig up a grave. How do we get the boys to do it for us?”

“Rock, paper, scissors?”

“Coin toss?” Chase pauses. “No, I like rock, paper, scissors. I always know how to win against Sam. He always does rock.”

“And Dean always chooses scissors.”

***

Sam and Dean dig where the grave of Barry Cook is, while the girls watch in mild amusement.

“Why did we agree to this?” Dean asks. 

“I didn’t,” Sam says.

“Less talking, more digging, boys,” Chase calls to them. They both turn to look at her with a bitch face, before turning back to the dirt. Suddenly, two shovel-fulls of dirt fly through the air to land on Chase, most of it getting in her hair. “You bastards!” she swears, spitting dirt out of her mouth. 

“Less talking, more digging,” Dean says.

“And we’re digging,” Sam finishes. 

Eventually, after about an hour, there’s a loud clunk as a shovel hits the hard wood of a coffin.

“Okay, our turn,” Harley says, nudging Chase forward. Chase grins and takes a matchbox out of her pocket.

“That smile means we should definitely never trust you with fire,” Dean says as the boys climb out of the hole. 

“Oh well,” Chase shrugs. 

Harley pours salt and gasoline on the remains, while Chase  lights a match, her grin growing in width. 

Dropping the match, Chase and Harley step back as flames leap into the air. The smell of charred bones and flesh and gasoline looms over them as the four hunters walk away from the scene. Going back into their individual cars, the group is quiet. 

***

Jack and Baby were parked on a hill a little ways away from a bridge. Sam is shirtless because Harley is sewing up the stab wound he sustained from a girl possessed by the ghost.

“Only you are nerd enough to get stabbed by a compass,” Chase scoffs.

“Compass? Compasses can’t do that,” Dean says.

“A math compass, Dean. As in, an instrument to draw circles.”

Dean pointedly ignores Chase. “Here, this will make you feel better,” he says. Sam nods, taking the beer. “That ghost is dead!” Dean practically growls. “I’m gonna rip it’s lungs out. Well,” he pauses. “You know what I mean.”

“You do realize the most we can do is put it to rest,” Harley points out continuing her work.

“It knew my name, guys. My real name. We burned Barry’s bones. What the hell?” Sam says.

“Maybe we missed something. We could have been wrong about Barry,” Chase says. “We just got to go back.”

Dean, looking through paperwork, suddenly gasps. “No way, how did we not see this before?”

“See what?” Harley asks.

“Check it out -- Look, Martha Dumptruck, Revenge of the Nerds, and Hello Kitty -- they rode the same bus.”

“Okay, so maybe the bus is haunted,” Sam suggests. 

“Well, that would explain why there's no EMF at the school, but not the attacks. I mean, ghosts are tied to the places that they haunt. They can't just bail.”

“Actually,” Chase starts.

“Actually,” Dean mimics in a high pitched voice. No one laughs. Chase gives him a look, unamused. Dean sighs, “Continue.”

“Actually,” Chase says again, emphasizing the word and shooting Dean another look, “there's lore about spirits possessing people and riding them for miles, then whenever they leave the body, they're bungeed back to their usual haunt. But until then, the ghosts can go wherever they want.”

“So a spook just grabs a kid on the bus and walks right into Truman?” Dean asks, not convinced.

“Well, yeah,” Chase says.

“Ghosts getting creative -- well, that's super,” Dean says sarcastically. 

“Sounds possible,” Harley says, agreeing with Sam and Chase. 

“You’re supposed to be on my side!” Dean pouts. 

“I’m on my side,” Harley says, sticking her tongue out at him.

***

“Do you see anything?” Chase calls to the boys, who are inside the bus. 

“It’s definitely not clean,” Sam responds. 

“Here, ghosty, ghosty, ghosty! Come out, come out, wherever you are!” Dean calls.

“Yes, Dean, because saying ‘Here, ghosty, ghosty’ is sure to make it appear. Maybe it’s Casper the friendly ghost!” Chase says in a heavily sarcastic tone.

“Or the Boo Brothers,” Harley adds.

“Got anything better?” Dean asks, before adding, “Nice one,” at the end of his statement.

“Man, I don't get it. No one ever died on this bus, and it's not like there's a body hidden in here,” Sam says.

“Or is there?” Chase asks ominously.

“Yeah, but a flap of skin, a hair, I mean, hell, a hangnail -- something's got to be tying the ghost to this place. We just got to find it.”

“I really hope it’s not a hangnail,” Harley says.

“I dunno,” Chase says. “Hangnail’s better than a ‘flap of skin’.”

“I’d rather deal with the skin, thank you very much.”

“Got a new driving permit. Issued two weeks ago,” Dean says from the front of the school bus. The girls go over and peer at the papers in Dean’s hand.

“Isn’t that just before the first attack?” Chase asks.

“Yeah,” Dean says. “Name of the bus driver is Dirk McGregor Sr., 39 North Central Avenue.”

“McGregor?” Sam asks.

“Yeah, why?”

“I knew his son.”

“Did you know everybody at this school?” Dean asks.

“How’d you remember his name?” Chase asks incredulously.

“And his last name, at that,” Harley adds.

“Just because your guys’ attention span is that of a gnat and your memory like a goldfish, doesn’t mean I can’t remember things.” He pauses. “Besides, do you not remember anyone you went to school with?”

***

Harley spent her Valentine’s Day junior year watering a bouquet of purple roses from every water fountain she could find. Everyone wanted to know where she got them and every time she had the same response, “They’re for Julia.”

She was careful and tore off every faulty petal in order to make sure the bouquet was perfect. It was at the end of the day when she finally could give Julia her gifts. One of which was a card asking her to be Harley’s girlfriend.

“Hey,” Julia says.

“Hey,” Harley responds.

“I adore the card.”

“I’m glad. So what’s your answer?”

“I really don’t want you to feel like I’m stringing you along, I’m moving in four months, back to Washington. I just don’t want to get attached and hurt you.”

“It’s fine, I might move too, but who’s to say we can’t make the most of the time we have here?”

“I just don’t want to waste time on something if I know it has a deadline. You know? I still wanna be friends.”

“Yeah, I guess, do you mind if I take a day or two though?”

“Take your time. I’m here though.”

“Thank you,” Harley says before leaving as her heart silently breaks.

***

“So that’s it then,” Chase says, disbelief written on her face.

“Well, yeah,” Nathaniel says. 

“You’re just done. With us. With everything?” Chase’s voice is drenched in desperation, as though if she argued her way through it, he’d change his mind.

“There isn’t anything there anymore.” Nathaniel’s face is like stone- like always. His blue eyes guarded, mouth in a thin line.

“Well, you could’ve fucking told me that in the beginning instead of leading me on!”

“I never led you on!” Nathaniel says, finally showing some semblance of an emotion, causing a surge of pride in Chase’s chest. Not many people were ever able to get under his skin, let alone in a way for him to care enough to defend himself.

“Then what do you call two days ago? Saying you liked me. Spouting that bull about talking to my dad and brothers!”

“I just decided that this isn’t working out.”

“Decided,” Chase repeats. “Decided? You don’t just decide these things, Nathaniel. They’re emotions! You can’t just flip off your emotions like a switch!”

“I didn’t. I’ve felt like this for a while.”

“Oh, so we’re backtracking to the leading me on part, are we?”

Nathaniel groans, running a hand through his hair. 

“No, you don’t get to be frustrated. You’re the one that promised you’d be there. You’re the one that promised you wouldn’t leave. You said nothing I said or did could make you leave, so what the hell? What do you call this?”

“I call this deciding it’s not working out!”

“Fuck you, Nathaniel. You’re a poor, pathetic, useless, spineless, son of a bitch! Everyone who ever said you weren’t worth it, were right! You weren’t! I thought you were different, but whoops. Guess the joke’s on me, huh?” Chase turns to leave.

“You don’t get to have the last word in this.”

Chase turns back to look at Nathaniel over her shoulder, tears falling down her face. “You knew full well. No, you know full well that I am in love with you. That all I wanted was for you to be happy, and for you to be in my life. I didn’t start this romance shit. You did. So, if this is the end of so much time, so much fucking time and effort, of my life I spent fighting with you, hating you, loving you, and being on and off friends with you, then know this. You’re ending this. You’re the reason this got fucked up. Not me.”

“You and I both know that this is your fault,” Nathaniel says.

Chase just ignores him and walks away, backpack slung over her shoulder, and her heart on the pavement behind her.

***

The four hunters sit on McGregor’s couch; Chase and Sam on the left side of the couch, while Dean, who has his arm around Harley as they are holding hands, takes up the right alongside Harley.

“So, you were friends with Dirk?” McGregor asks.

“Yes, sir, in high school,” Sam replies.

“I don't recall Dirk having many friends at Truman.”

“When did, uh -- when did Dirk pass?” Dean asks.

“He was eighteen.”

“What happened to him?” Chase asks.

“Well, there was, first, drinking, then drugs, and then too many drugs. And then he just slipped through my fingers. It was my fault. I should have seen it coming, you know? Dirk, he, uh -- he had his troubles.”

“Troubles?” Harley prods.

“School was never easy for Dirk. We didn't have much money, and, well, you know, kids -- they can be cruel. They picked on him.”

“They picked on him?” Sam asks, surprised.

“They called him poor and dirty and stupid. They even had a nickname for him -- Dirk the jerk. And after what happened to his mother, he…” McGregor cuts himself off.

“His mother?” Chase asks.

“Yeah, Jane, my wife. She died when Dirk was 13. Cancer. I was working three jobs, so it fell to Dirk to take care of her. And he was a great kid. He made sure Jane got her medicine. He helped her, cleaned up after her. But, you know, you -- you watch somebody die slow, waste away to nothing... it does things to a person. Horrible things.”

“I didn't know about his mother,” Sam says quietly.

“He -- he wouldn't talk about her, not even to me. Lot of anger in that boy.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Well, we'd really like to pay our respects, Mr. McGregor. Um, you mind telling us where Dirk is buried?” Dean asks.

“Oh, he wasn't. I had him cremated,” McGregor states.

“All of him?”

“Well, I kept a lock of his hair.”

“Oh, that's -- that's nice. Where do you keep that?”

“On my bus, in my Bible.”

***

The brakes squeal loudly as Chase slams on the brakes, swearing. Moving off to the side of the road, the two girls hop out of the car, following quickly behind Sam and Dean. Sam walks up to a man getting out of the bus, while Dean sneaks around the other side of the bus, to be behind the man and anyone getting out. 

“Dirk!” Sam yells. The man who’d gotten out of the bus first turns to Sam with a cruel smile on his face. 

“Winchester, what are you gonna do? Shoot me?”

Dean sneaks up behind Dirk and wraps a rope around his body, while Harley rushes into the bus. “This rope is soaked in salt water. You’re not going anywhere.”

“Alright, everybody. Stay where you are and everything will be fine,” Harley says. 

“Aren’t you the drama teacher?”

“No, not really. More like ‘21 Jump Street’. The bus driver sells pot. Yeah, that’s it.” She starts to shuffle through the front of the bus, looking for the hair. After a moment, she looks up in exasperation. “It’s not here!”

“Where is it?” Sam demands. Dirk simply smirks. 

“Nowhere you’ll ever find it.”

Sam, obviously done with the situation, puts the gun directly against Dirk’s chest. Dirk struggles against the rope for a second. “Where is it?”

“Sam Winchester. Still a bully. You, you jocks... you popular kids... you always thought you were better than everybody else. And to you, I was just Dirk the jerk, right? Now you evil sons of bitches are gonna get what's coming to you.”

“I'm not evil, Dirk,” Sam says. “I'm not. And neither were you. Trust me. I've seen real evil. We were scared and miserable, and we took it out on each other -- us and everybody else. That's high school. But you suffer through that, and it gets better. I'm just sorry you didn't get a chance to see that... you or Barry.”

“Nothing is going to get better for me. Never.”

Dirk breaks out of the rope, knocking Dean to the ground easily. Sam shoots him with a salt round and he goes flying. A student, within moments, climbs out of the bus, obviously possessed by Dirk. 

Chase rushes over to the passed out bus driver, making sure he’s alive. 

Harley tries to shoot at the student, but misses, as the ghost beats Sam up. 

“Chase!” Sam calls. “Find the hair!”

Harley takes this moment to check on Dean, who’d been knocked out moments earlier. 

Chase pats down the man, trying to find where the hair had been hidden. Finally finding it, she reaches into his pocket and takes it out. “I swear, this isn’t what it looks like,” She mutters to herself, grabbing a lighter. She lights the hair on fire and the Dirk-possessed student screams. 

The student slumps forward onto Sam, who struggles beneath the weight of the larger student. Dean laughs from his spot on the ground, next to Harley. He winces, holding his head in pain. “He’s giving you full cowgirl,” Dean laughs.

This breaks the tension and the four hunters begin to breathe normally again, glad to be done with Dirk-the-Jerk.

[themusicplayedherlife]

Of Warmth and Growth

pairing: dick grayson x f!reader characters: reader, the team, dick grayson word count: 7.7k+ warnings: angst, self doubt, and boat load of fluff summary: dealing with a broken heart isn’t easy, but your friend megan is hoping to get you out of that fink by inviting you to her holiday party where you meet someone that might help you move on. a/n: there’s a whole story behind this--originally this was started as a requested oneshot, but i couldn’t bring myself to finish it, so i revamped it and wrote a different story that i posted some time ago. fast forward to november, i made it my goal to finish this before the new year, and i was so close, too, but family took priority. there might also be a disconnect, but I really tried smoothing it over, hopefully I did well. anyway, better late than never, though?

Happy Harbour

December 7, 2019

“Sometimes it’s very hard to move on, but once you move on, you’ll realize it was the best decision you’ve ever made. You’ll see.”

You want to laugh bitterly at Megan’s words, but her sympathetic smile and warm gaze are holding you back from doing so. She’s only trying to help, you’re reminded by your conscious as she continues to spew words of healing and bullshit. Utter bullshit. 

Your bitterness wins and you say, “I know,” wanting nothing more than for her to shut up. 

Her smile turns sheepish and she pats your hand affectionately before excusing herself to get more coffee, or to get away from you. You wouldn’t blame her if it was the latter, you haven’t exactly been good company to keep around since your break up.

Sighing, your eyes trail to the world on the other side of the small cafe’s window. It’s bustling and full of people with shopping bags, all of them preparing for the holidays. It really is a different world outside, you muse. Everything inside the coffee shop is warmer and cozier—quieter compared to the outside. It almost, almost makes you forget about your broken heart that was ripped and stomped on by the person you thought loved and cared for you, things that you still, unfortunately, feel for them.

Your red-haired friend comes back with two styrofoam cups instead of one, and she sets one down in front of you, taking her seat across from you once more. “I got you another earl grey.”

You pick up the warm styrofoam, enjoying the heat against your palm. “Thank you.”

Megan doesn’t say anything for once, instead she watches the world with you, letting only the soft jazz of the cafe to envelop you. You can tell she’s going over something in her mind, she’s never this quiet unless she’s thinking, and that’s—usually—never a good thing, at least not when it pertains to you. 

It’s not until you’re halfway done with your drink that she finally speaks, having grown restless with her thinking. She’s looking at you, her eyes narrowed and a little shaky, never really making contact with your own, but still facing your direction. “Sooo, I was thinking,” she drawls, “Conner and I are inviting some of our old friends over for a little get together this weekend and I thought, hey, maybe I can convince my best friend in the whole universe to finally meet my other friends, you know, I want us all to be friends and—“

“You’re rambling.”

“Right; sorry. It’s not going to be a huge thing, just a few of us watching crappy movies and drinking spiked eggnog, maybe play some games or something.” She reaches for your hand holding your drink and finally meets your eyes. “And I really want you to be there. What do you say, huh?”

“Megan,” you start warningly.

She raises a hand as a peace sign. “I know, I know! You said you wanted to keep a low profile this holiday season, but I really want to introduce you. They’re really nice people, a little odd, but so am I and you’re still my friend!”

You purse your lips, mulling over the idea. “Are the girls going to be there?”

“Yes! Well, Karen will be, I’m not sure about Wendy, yet. Should probably ask her tonight.”

Again, you think it over. Not only will you be in a small, confined space with a lot of people (she might have said it wasn’t going to be huge, but you and her have different definitions for small and huge), you’re going to be stuck in a confined space with strangers. It doesn’t sound very pleasing, but then again, you haven’t been very pleasant and there’s no denying that you always dodged her past intents to get you and her friends to hang out, and yet, she’s still here, trying to cheer you up. 

You owe it to her. 

“Okay, I’ll go.” She immediately squeals. Loudly. Blushing, you look around the cafe, and just as you feared, everyone in the small cafe is looking at you. You sigh, lifting a hand to stop her from over exerting herself—and from embarrassing you any further. “Just don’t expect me to bring anything.”

“That’s fine! That’s fine! As long as you bring yourself, I’m content.”

You’re going to regret it, you just know it.

Happy Harbour

December 14, 2019

You tug at the hem of your outfit, uncomfortable. You could hear the loud laughter of the people inside accompanied by the soft hum of Megan’s holiday playlist. In your hand is a Tupperware full of brigadeiro, a Brazilian dessert your grandma used to make for the holidays before she completely quit eating sweet things (in front of your mom anyway).

Fingers tighten around the container. Maybe you should go... You could always deal with an angry Megan later. 

“Are you going to go in or are you just going to stare at the wreath all night?” A deep, amused voice registers in your mind and your body jerks in response, almost making you drop the Tupperware if it weren’t for the steady hand holding you against their strong, chest. “Whoa, there!” he exclaims, warm air fanning over your neck. “You all right?”

He doesn’t allow you to pull away until he steadies you, making sure you’re upright before letting you go. “Yeah, I’m fine,” you breathe out. “Thank you.”

He chuckles and you whirl around to meet your assailant and savior—and holy fuck is he gorgeous. They were gorgeous, too, but in that average kind of way. Nothing about them stood out to people, but to you? They were the most beautiful person you had ever seen. But this man in front of you, you had to be stupid not to notice how gorgeous he is. Striking blue eyes peering into you, a mischievous glint in them and matched by the lopsided smirk adorning his face; unruly black locks in waves and falling to one side as he runs his fingers through his hair. There’s something distinctly boyish and alluring about him that it renders you speechless.

“Megan never told me she had such a gorgeous friend,” he suddenly says. Or maybe not so suddenly because you’re sure his mouth had been moving before you allowed yourself to fall under his spell.

Hold on. 

Wait a second.

Gorgeous?

Did he really just call you gorgeous, too?

Your throat closes and your eyes widen, hopefully not comically or at all because holy shit. A really gorgeous man just called you gorgeous. The last person to ever compliment was your mom. But she’s your mom. She’s supposed to think you’re pretty good looking. And before that it was them. And realizing it now, they probably never even meant it. So this? This is new and weird and what the fuck are you supposed to say to something like that to someone like him. “I—“ 

A draft of air hits your back as the door is swung open behind you. The Christmas music that Megan has been preparing since June is louder than before without the door closed.

“You’re here,” she squeals, wrapping her arms from behind you, her chin settling on your shoulder. “I’m so happy you came!” She kisses your cheek messily and something sweet and alcoholic fills your nostrils. “And you brought something!”

“Yeah, yeah! Don’t make it a thing.” You laugh, pulling away as she makes a show of having to let you go. “How much eggnog have you had?” 

“Not too much.” Her eyes turn to the other guest and her eyes brighten. “Dick!” Dick? What kind of name is Dick? Was his mom angry at his dad? Noticing your stare, he smiles down at you, amusement never leaving his face before he turns to Megan. “You’re here! Wally and the others are already here.” She moves away from the door to let you both in.

Dick gestures to the inside of her apartment. “After you.”

Blinking owlishly, you thank him and enter the loud apartment full of people you don’t recognize—well, mostly of people you don’t recognize. There’s Karen and Mal by the Christmas tree talking to a redhead and a blonde, who Dick makes his way over to after excusing himself. Wendy is with Marvin by the snack table, the two arguing—really it's Marvin arguing—about which dessert is the best for the holidays, and a few other really gorgeous and fit people. Why are all of her friends ridiculously good looking?

“You okay?” Megan asks, her hand settling on your shoulder and squeezing lightly.

Your head swivels in her direction. “What?”

“You were frowning,” she says softly. “Hey, if I forced you to be here—“

“No,” you interrupt her quickly. “No, I’m glad you invited me, I just—I’ll be okay. I promise. You were right about me having to move on. I can’t avoid society forever because of a broken heart. I just need to get used to… this,” you say, moving your eyes around the party of people that seemed to already be coupled off.

She smiles gently but doesn’t seem all that convinced. “I’m right here if you need me, okay?” She takes the Tupperware from your hands. “Come on, let's say hi to everyone.” When you bristle, as you take off your coat, she laughs. “In moderation.”

An hour into the party and you’ve already become acquainted with mostly everyone at the party. You meet Wally and Artemis, the couple who were with Karen and Mal when you first arrived; Raquel and her baby boy, Amistad. Cassie and Tim; Jaime and Bart; Gar and some really weird guy who keeps glaring at Conner; Kaldur, who looks strangely familiar—and only smiles when you mention it before being pulled away by Megan—and Barbara, who eyes you momentarily before flashing you a warm smile. She’s a little intimidating, if you’re being honest.

There are still a few more people you have yet to meet, but you seriously need a break, and you say as much to Megan.

“You said a little party,” you say accusingly, as if you hadn’t known this was her definition of small.

She laughs, her arm hooked around yours as she pulls you towards the spread of food and drinks. “It is little!” She lets go of you, opens the treats you made and places them between all the others. She then grabs a clean cup to fill it with eggnog before handing it to you. “Here! Conner and I made it, so it might not be… good.”

You take a tentative sip of the thick liquid made out of egg and spices and doused with alcohol and holy fuck do you regret it. “You and Conner made this?” you sputter, the taste of bourbon lingering strongly on your tongue.

She pouts. “The recipe called for a ton of bourbon to counteract the sweetness!”

You pull the cup away and eye the liquid with scrutiny. “Did you put a whole bottle of Bourbon from Costco in here?”

“Yes?” she answers, a little unsure. “Probably. I don’t actually remember.”

Conner comes up from behind her and wraps his arms around her waist. “Enjoying yourselves?” 

She tilts her head to kiss him on his cheek continuously and smiles. “Always.” 

You avert your gaze. 

“It’s good to see you again,” Conner addresses you after they’ve had their fill of small pecks. Honestly, you don’t blame them for being so affectionate and in love. It wasn’t that long ago that the two finally decided to give each other another chance after a falling out that Megan still doesn’t want to talk about. And again, you don’t blame her. You don’t want to talk about the reason why you and your ex broke up either, let alone think about it. 

You hum and reluctantly move your gaze back to their interlocked embrace. You manage a smile. “Same to you. Been a while hasn’t it?” 

Before he can reply, Gar interrupts with a call of their names. He’s standing near the fireplace with Bart, leaning over something. “Come check this out!”

Megan wiggles out of Conner’s hold and instead grabs his hand to lead him towards the boys. “Don’t go anywhere!”

Conner flashes an exasperated glance at you over his shoulder, which you return, before he wraps his arms around Megan again—the two laughing and joking about who knows what as they close the distance between them and the boys.

Sighing, you take another sip of the eggnog and your face scrunches in response to the liquid coating your tongue. “Bleh.”

“Fell victim to the spiked eggnog, I see,” a voice cuts through your thoughts as you wipe your mouth with the back of your hand.

Eyes snap up to meet the familiar, amused gaze of Dick. “Uh, yeah.”

He offers you a different mug and you eye it suspiciously. He chuckles. “It’s just apple cider, I promise.”

You reluctantly relent, taking the mug he offers as he takes the one you had been drinking. You take a sip, and surprisingly enough, it really is apple cider, no alcohol at all. “Oh, god, thank you.”

He flashes you a pearly smile, and takes a sip of the eggnog without grimacing. “So, how did you meet Megan and Conner?”

“Oh, um, from school. We went to the same high school.” He quirks an eyebrow. “I was a year below them, but I became friends with Megan when she joined the cheerleading team. My friendship with Conner just followed naturally after that.”

His eyes brighten, as if what you’re saying is actually interesting. “Really?”

You curl a piece of loose hair behind your ear. “Uh, yeah. What about you? How did you meet them?”

“Oh, through our families,” he supplies, a little detached, as if it weren’t really important. “Most of us met like that.”

You frown, but try to hide it behind the rim of the mug. “Wow. Then you must’ve known Megan for quite some time, then?”

His eyes flicker to your lips and his turn upwards. “Actually, I’ve probably known her for about the same amount of time as you.”

Wait. If that's true…“Does that mean you went to the Halloween disaster of 2016?” You remember Megan telling you she would be inviting her friends to the dance, and you heard that she did. Maybe he was among them?

He snorts. “Is that what they’re calling it?” You nod eagerly, hoping to hear his side of what happened that night.

“No.” You deflate, and he huffs a laugh. “I wasn’t able to go, had plans that night. Did you?”

You pout, the disappointment you felt at missing that night coming to mind. “Unfortunately, no. I was sick, but I heard from Marvin and the others that it was a night to remember.”

You don’t get to ask him more questions because as soon as you open your mouth, the front door opens to reveal a beautiful girl with dark, raven hair in delicate waves and bright blue eyes entering the room. Immediately, everyone (excluding you, Marvin and Wendy—wtf Karen?) recognizes her and greet her with a loud exclaim of her name, “Zatanna!”

Dick turns to you and you already know that he’s about to excuse himself. “Do you mind if—“ 

You shake your head interrupting him with, “No, no, go ahead.”

Surprisingly, he reaches for your arm and squeezes gently. “I’ll be right back.”

You blink after him and mutter, “Yeah. Okay.”

“Be right back” doesn’t happen. He stays by the pretty girl’s side, the two of them being overly familiar with one another—tight hugs, continuous small touches, long eye contact, leaning against one another. You wouldn’t be surprised if they dated at some point, to be honest; or maybe they are dating—ugh. Why does the thought of it bother you?

“You all right?” Wendy softly asks, her kind eyes full of worry and briefly moving to Karen by the entrance.

What’s that about?

You try to keep from frowning. “I think I just need some fresh air,” you assure her.

“Do you want me to come with you?” 

“No, I’ll be fine. I’ll just be out for a moment, besides—“ you flick your eyes to Marvin by the dessert table stuffing his face with walnut bread—“I think you’d better stay to make sure Marvin doesn’t eat all the walnut bread.”

“Oh—damn it, Marvin!” She sighs ready to chastise her boyfriend, but she pauses to look at you. “Let me know if you need anything, okay?”

You hum in agreement and watch as she saunters over to Marvin before turning on your heels and stepping out through the sliding doors leading to the balcony.

The cold winter air bites your skin, your long sleeved turtleneck not enough to combat the cold, but just thinking about going back inside makes you try to suck it up. You cover your mouth with your sleeve as you lean against the railing—Happy Harbor lights glinting brightly in the dark. 

Maybe you should leave. You’ve been here a good amount of time to deem acceptable, right? You’ve met some of Megan’s friends and even talked to a few of them for a while, and you didn’t show an ounce of disgruntlement—as far as you know—so you should be good right?

An ache fills your chest, pulsing slowly as you let out a long sigh. God, what happened to you? You weren’t always like this. So closed off and unwilling to spend time with your friends. You’ve practically been unconsciously ignoring Karen and Mal, attaching yourself to Megan when she is alone, or staying with Marvin and Wendy because they act least like a couple compared to your old classmates. And the moment the one person you’ve talked to for an extended period of time at the party joins his pretty friend, you become bitter about it! 

You need help.

Something heavy lands on your shoulders and back, strong cologne filling your nostrils and making you jump.

“Woah, easy, it’s just me.”

Startling blue eyes twinkle with mischief and your shoulders drop, heat combatting the cold air. “Anyone ever tell you not to sneak up on people?”

He just grins and settles in the space beside you, eyes sweeping over the town you grew up in. “My job kind of requires that I do.”

You slip your arms through the sleeves of his coat, ignoring the fact that it’s not exactly your size. It’s warm anyway. “Thank you.” You lean forward, tightening the coat to fit you snuggly. “What kind of job requires you to have ninja like stealth?”

He chuckles, meeting your gaze. “I’m an officer at Bludhaven PD, trying to become detective.”

Your eyebrows furrow. “Bludhaven? Really?”

He hums, elbow resting on the railing and cupping his cheek.

“Isn’t that dangerous?” Gotham has its norierty, but so does Bludhaven. It was basically untapped, scandals and crimes hidden behind a veil created by corrupt officials, until a couple of years ago when it all came to light with Nightwing’s arrival.

“Yeah,” he drawls, mulling it over, “but what isn’t? Anything can be dangerous if you think about it.” He leans closer to you. “Where do you work?”

“Happy Harbour Times, Opinions.”

“Then you must have to deal with a lot of angry readers when you write about something they don’t agree with, right? Threats and angry phone calls and letters. Those can be dangerous, too, right?” he asks cheekily.

You laugh, ducking your head. “I guess you’re right.” There’s still no comparing writing articles to police work, no matter how light of a situation Dick is trying to make it. “Why police work, though? It’s not many people’s first choice. Especially in Bludhaven.”

He shrugs. “Always been interested, I guess.” He leans back, hands holding onto the railing and causing his blue cable knit sweater to wrap tightly around his arm muscles. “My guardian…” Now, that’s an interesting choice of words. “He was—is a fan of mysteries.” His voice is far off, stuck in his jar of memories. “When he took me in, we’d used to solve cases together, most of them taking place in Gotham, where I was raised.” He chuckles. “And I guess from there I just… I just decided I wanted to be a cop.”

“I see... And you decided not to become a cop in Gotham?”

“Gotham has good people looking out for her already.”

“She could always use more.” He cracks a smile, blue eyes twinkling with the city lights as they find yours, and you return it shyly. “But I get it. Bludhaven has become yours, in a way. Separate from your… guardian.”

“In a way,” he repeats, and you have to look away from or else your heart will stop. “What about you?”

“What about me?”

He nudged your shoulder with his. “Happy Harbour Times?”

“Ah.” Your breath comes out in a puff, the night air still growing colder by the hour, but you don’t mind it. Dick doesn’t seem to mind either. “Well, when I was a kid, my third grade teacher told my parents I was a really good writer. So, they got me into workshops and short story competitions,” you recall, remembering the constant competitions your parents would sign you up for without your knowledge sometimes. They did it with good intentions, hoping to help hone your skill, but it was too much sometimes. “Truth is, I hated it. Never really liked… fiction, I guess? Don’t get me wrong, give me a good fiction novel and I will read it for days, but… it… it just wasn’t me,” you confess locking your fingers in place. 

“I was about ready to give up on writing when my tenth grade English teacher assigned us a topic to write about and I guess I fell in love with the research and being able to go out and interview people.”

“Yeah? And what was it that you wrote about?”

You bite your lip and find Dick staring at you, a curious glimmer in his eyes. “Don’t laugh?” He promises he won’t. “Robin.”

He chokes on his saliva, eyes growing in disbelief. “As in Batman’s Robin?”

You tuck strands of hair behind your ear, refusing to meet his gaze. “Yeah, um, the prompt was about vigilantes and I chose to write about him instead of the Flash, Batman, Wonder Woman and whoever else everyone wrote about.”

“Why?”

You shrug, trying your best to mask your embarrassment with a blase attitude. “Fighting crime with Batman? That was pretty cool, you know? He was living every kid’s dream.”

“Was he?” he asks, voice soft.

“He was!” you confess, smile blooming on your face as a memory of you and your friends playing as the superhero sidekicks comes to mind. It’s some of your best memories from elementary school. “But I didn’t want to just write about the good. He was a kid seeing some fucked up shit, after all.” You pause to look at him, only to find he’s not looking at you, but at the city lights. There’s something… wistful and forlorn in those blue eyes of his, and you wonder if he’s thinking back on his time in Gotham, seeing Boy Wonder up close and personal. “Being Robin must’ve taken its toll on him, both mentally and physically. 

“And I wanted to write about that. Even had my parents drive up to Gotham for the weekend so I could do some snooping, maybe even find Boy Wonder myself.”

Finally he reacts, lips twitching as he turns to look at you. “And how’d that go?”

“I learned that the citizens of Gotham really hate being asked questions.” He chuckles and you smile. “But those who did answer... you can tell they were grateful for him and worried about him. The kid really touched people’s hearts, whether they agreed with his nightly activities with Batman or not.” You tilt your head, watching his eyes light up with your words. “It’s just a shame I didn’t get to interview Robin himself.” You grab hold of the railing and lean forward. “But I’d doubt he’d have given me the time of day if I had gotten the chance to ask him. Probably too busy saving babies and punching villains with Batman.”

“I’m sure he would have made time for you.” Your fingers slip from the metal to turn to look at him, unsure of his sincerity. “How could he not?” His cheeks have become flushed with the cold, nose bright and blue eyes stark against his skin.

You smile, but you’re sure it looks more like an awkward grimace. “You’re just saying that.” 

“I’m not.” He frowns, sincere eyes knocking your breath away. “I know if he knew someone as sincere as you wanted to ask him some questions for their article, he would have dropped whatever he was doing to help you.”

You don’t know why you stand there, waiting for him to laugh in your face and say his punchline. You don’t know why he just stands there and stares back at you, quiet and shining with sincerity that he’s trying to penetrate into your being. It’s weird and totally unnecessary, but maybe a part of you is desperate to know if he’s really being sincere and a part of him is desperate for you to know he is.

“Hey!” Megan’s voice break through the trance you’re both in. Her head barely poking out into the cold and green eyes narrowing. “Get in here before you both catch something!”

Dick chuckles, attention moving from her to you. “Should we head in?”

You nod mutely, smiling tight lipped.

As you follow Megan inside, the only thing on your mind is that you might have already caught something.

Bludhaven

December 15, 2020

“You’re really not coming home for the Holidays this year?”

Megan is pouting on your computer screen, but you hardly pay her any attention. You have an article on Bludhaven’s growing homelessness due in the morning and you still have some revisions to do. Your little mishap earlier today took time that you were reserving for this article and now you’re running behind.

“‘Fraid not,” you tell her, your voice accompanied by the clicking of your keyboard. “I’ve been overloaded with a ridiculous amount of work this month and I need to get it done before the end of the year.”

From the corner of your eye, you can see her scavenging through boxes of decorations. “Won’t your mom be disappointed you won’t be coming home?”

“Nope,” you pop the “p” as you rewrite a fragment. “She’s coming down to see me instead.”

She stops, head lifting like a prairie dog on alert. “So it’s just going to be you two this year?”

“Maybe. Dick said he might stop by, but he’s not sure.”

“Ooh,” her teasing rings through your quiet bedroom and you roll your eyes.

“It’s not like that, Megan.” You wished it were like that, but it’s not, and maybe it’s for the best. Dick became one of your good friends since the party last year and one of your best friends after you volunteered for a transfer to Bludhaven’s Times earlier this year. You don’t want to mess with what you have, not right now when your life feels perfectly balanced.

“Don't let the person who didn't love you keep you from the person who will,” she says, sounding serious as hell and making you snort and pause in your typing. “Hey! Don’t laugh at my words of wisdom!”

“This has nothing to do with them, Megan. When I said I was finally over them, I meant it.” The moment you were able to look at an old tagged picture of you and them on their friends’ Instagram and you felt nothing, no numbness, no anger nor sadness, just a strange vagueness as if they were a stranger, you knew you were over them. “Dick and I… we like where we are.”

“Boo.”

Conner appear on screen and shakes his head as he wraps his arm around her shoulder. “Don’t listen to her. I respect your decision.”

She rolls her eyes, playfully pushing his head out of the screen. “I respect your decision too, doesn’t mean I agree with it.”

“Heckling does not equate respect, babe.”

You laugh at their antics, their displays of affections no longer bothering you. Now, when you see them you just feel happy, happy for them and for you. Bitterness long gone from your bones, and there’s one person you can thank for that.

Your phone on your desk dings.

Dick 🥳🤩: Chinese food 2nite?

You: only if you promise to get extra egg rolls 

Dick 🥳🤩: Got’chu, omw.

“You’re smiling! Why are you smiling? It’s Dick, isn’t it? It’s totally Dick.”

You roll your eyes, trying to keep your face neutral but knowing you’re doing horribly at it. “I have to go, I’ll talk to you later.”

“Wait, is he coming over?” She gushes, and Conner is back on screen, trying to wrestle the phone out of her grip.

You laugh when you hear a curse from Conner. “I have an article to finish, Megan.”

“You can’t just leave me hanging like this—“

All right, you’ve had enough. “Bye, Megan!”

Megan🧡: 😨 You hung up on me?

Megan🧡: 😡😡

Megan🧡: Expecting deets tomorrow ❤️

You: goodnight, megan!

It doesn’t take long for Dick to arrive and for you to shove your article aside—you’re almost done with it anyway, nothing wrong with a little break.

The door jingles and as you begin to clear your coffee table—where you and Dick usually eat dinner—of your paperwork, it opens to reveal Dick still wearing his uniform. You smile up at him briefly, gathering everything and taking it over to your round, small dining table that could probably fit four people if you really tried to squeeze them in. “Hey! Let me just grab some plates and we can—“

Before you can finish your sentence, or head into the kitchen, a hand wraps around your wrist, worried crystallized blue eyes staring into you. “Why didn’t you tell me you were almost mugged?”

Ah, hell. 

The crack in his voice makes your heart drop to your stomach and your eyes fall down to his ugly black shoes that you make fun of every chance you get just to hear his laugh. “I’m sorry,” you mumble. “I didn’t want to worry you.”

Which isn’t a lie. Since you moved to Bludhaven, Dick has been checking up on you more often and even picking you up from work if he has the chance—“Bludhaven isn’t like Happy Harbor. It’s… tougher and harder,” he had said after offering to teach you some self defense moves. You had laughed and said you could handle yourself, but accepted it anyway if it meant spending more time with him.

Today was just bad luck, he was on the other side of the city and you had chosen to take the bus to work that day and hadn’t been paying attention. Next thing you know, you’re being threatened to give your purse up.

His warm fingers leave your wrist and instead they find your chin. Gingerly, he lifts your head to force you to meet his gaze. “When Rohrbach called me on my way here to check up on you because she was worried, I swear my heart almost stopped.” His eyes shine with worry and there’s a twisting in your gut. “What if Louie hadn’t been nearby, huh?”

“I’m okay, Dick,” you reassure him, wanting nothing more than to lean against him, maybe have his lips press a kiss on your forehead. “I handled him pretty well. Used those self defense moves you taught me.” It was why you were able to shake him off and run to the nearest officer for help. Dick inadvertently saved you.

He finally smiles. “Yeah, Rohrbach said you left him pretty bruised up.” His hand under your chin moves to smooth out your hair before cupping the back of your head and pressing you against him. “I need you to be more careful, sweetheart. Need you to be safe.”

Your heart bursts in your chest at the pet-name and you wrap your arms around his waist, fisting the jacket of his uniform tightly. His cologne makes you dizzy—ginger and spices for the holiday. “Only if you promise to stay safe, too.”

“I’ll do my best.” His soft lips land on your forehead briefly before he’s pulling away and you restrain yourself from chasing after him. “Let’s eat? You must be starving.”

“A little,” you admit, and let him pull you toward the couch. “Eating out of the cartons today?”

He flashes you a grin. “Why not?”

As you both settle next to each other on the floor, back being supported by your old couch and you turn on your television as he pulls out the food he bought, you can’t help but think that even if your relationship stay like this with Dick, you wouldn’t mind it.

Bludhaven

December 31, 2020

You check your watch for the umptenth time.

He’s late.

Everyone around you is celebrating, filling the bar with laughter and talk, most of it incoherent over the loud music and the inebriated state most of them are in. You’re only a few hours away from the New Year and people are already drunk out of their minds—this doesn’t spell trouble for the night whatsoever.

Dick 🥳🤩 (7)

7 outgoing calls, all unanswered and completely unlike him. Sure, sometimes he doesn’t answer your calls when he’s busy, that’s a given, but he always sends you a message if he’s going to be late or apologizes for not being able to answer your call. This just not like Dick. 

You try calling one more time, covering one ear with your palm  to hear the ringing, but just like before, you get sent to voicemail. Worry begins to over take your annoyance. You grab your bag and quickly make your way out of the crowded bar, not caring about the warm bodies complaining.

Driving to his place takes you about thirty minutes with traffic, and you occasionally find yourself cursing at other drivers and yourself. It’s a miracle you don’t get into an accident or pulled over. With his garage key that he gave you, you open the gate and make your way to the space that has become yours over the last couple of months with how much you visit him. 

Locking your car with a simple click of the key fob, you power walk to the elevator. One last time, you try calling him, hoping he’ll answer and apologize for being late, but once again it sends you to voicemail just as the elevator doors open on his floor. 

“Please be okay,” you whisper to yourself.

Taking out your copy of the key, you slowly insert it and tentatively call out to him as you open the door.

No answer.

You strain your hearing as you swear you hear some shuffling and thumping, but that noise could just be coming from down the hall. He does have some noisy neighbors. 

You enter the apartment and close the door behind you. “Dick?”

There’s a crash and you jump, your heart in your throat, but the familiar string of curses eases your fear. You follow the noise and come face to face with a wide eyed Dick shirtless covered in nasty forming bruises in the middle of his bathroom.

A whimper escapes your lips and you rush forward, cupping his face in your hand. “What the hell happened to you? I thought you managed to get the night off?” You turn his head this way and that, and then push him back by grabbing his shoulder to look at his torso and back. Only letting go when he winces at a particularly hard tug. “Oh shit! I’m sorry!”

He grabs your wrists not allowing you to give him space. “You’re not blushing,” he says cheekily, his eyes twinkling even with the slowly forming bruise.

Your eyebrows furrow. “Why would I be—“ Your eyes drag down to his naked torso peppered with old wounds and spanking brand new bruises and you immediately feel a wave of heat spreading through your body. “Oh.”

He laughs softly, chuckling almost, low and a sweet timbre. 

But when your eyes fall lower, you’re doused in cold water, black, almost skin tight material—unitard?—and a black holster wrapped around his right leg greeting you. This isn’t his police uniform! What is he wearing? And why does it look like kevlar? “Why are you—“

You’re not allowed a moment to ask because Dick pulls you towards him with a tug of your wrists and you fall against his chest, barely bracing yourself as he wraps his arms around your waist, large hands flat against your back.

“Dick?”

“I’m okay,” he murmurs airily into your hair and you don’t know what to do, you’re pretty sure he can feel and hear your pacing heart. 

You repeat his name, trying to pull away from him to look into his eyes. He doesn’t let you. 

He inhales. “Just give me a moment and I’ll answer any questions you might have.”

You sigh, warm air brushing against his bare skin, and the hands that braced yourself on the kitchen sink wrap around his torso loosely. “What happened?”

Circles are traced on your shirt, one hand climbing higher to cradle the back of your head. “Remember the guy who tried to rob you?” You nod and hum, remembering that crooked nosed, pale skin idiot who thought you’d be an easy target. “He escaped during transfer today with the help of some of his friends, and I went after them. Off record.”

You pull away from him and look up at him with wide eyes and slack jaw to find his serious gaze on you, lips pulled down into a thin line. “What do you mean off record?” Your throat closes and the back of your nose stings—he went after them ‘cause that man tried hurting you? “Dick, what if something happened—”

His eyes bore into you and his thumb find purchase on your face, tracing the curve of your cheekbone. “It's just a couple of scratches and bruises. I’m okay. I promise.”

You blink back your tears and lean into his touch. “You still shouldn’t have gone by yourself!”

“I didn’t,” he says softly. “I went with a friend.”

Your nose scrunches, your eyes still watery. “Rohrbach?”

He shakes his head. “No. Better, Robin.”

“Robin?” You try to remember if he’s ever mentioned anyone named Robin at the precinct, but you’re pretty sure he hasn’t—“Wait. Robin? As in Batman’s Robin?” His gaze doesn’t change, it remains serious and your heart leaps in your chest. “You really know Robin?”

He finally cracks a smile and you’re half expecting him to say he’s joking (you don’t know which is worse, him joking about knowing Robin when he’s aware how much admiration teen you had for him or finding out that he really went after that thug and his friends on his own!), but instead he answers with a simple, “Yeah.”

“Dick, if you’re—“

He chuckles, his thumb that had been tracing your cheekbone dragging down to your bottom lip, slowly tracing the swell. You would have melted if there weren’t more pressing matters at hand. “I’m not playing with you, sweetheart.”

Your eyes fall to his torso and down to his pants and the hanging arms of his unitard and they snap back up, alarmed. “Are you—does this mean you’re also a—“ you can’t even form a proper sentence, the rushing of your blood flowing through your head and ears drown out your thoughts and voice.

His hands drop from your frame and you take a step back as he adjusts the unitard, slipping into it only to have you gasping at the familiar symbol on his chest—Nightwing.

Without waiting for his permission, your fingers trace the symbol, the material under your fingers soft and somehow firm. A deep ache blooms in your chest, your nose wrinkling and Dick reacts quickly, cupping your face with his now covered hands, and you’d laugh any other time at the fact that his suit is falling forward and down his arms, but you’re too busy trying to keep yourself from crying.

It all makes sense now! His double shifts and all the injuries—gods. How could you have been so blind?

He rubs the corner of your eyes and coos gently, worry swimming in his eyes and honestly, that’s not fair! You’re the only one allowed to be worried right now! “Hey, hey, why are you crying, huh? What’s wrong?”

Your head falls forward and Dick leans down to press his forehead against yours. “This isn’t going to make me worry less about you, Dick.” Your fingers wrap around his thick forearms. “You promised you were going to try staying safe and this,” you pause to sigh, refusing to meet his eyes, ”this isn’t going to keep you safe.”

“I’m sorry,” he whispers into the space between you. “I’m sorry I’m going to make you worry. I’m sorry I’m making you cry. And I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before.”

“That doesn’t matter,” you say with a sniffle, because it doesn’t. You don’t care that he didn’t tell you he was Nightwing or that he allowed you to gush about Robin when he’s always known who that is. What matters is that now you know Dick is out every night as Nightwing risking his life and you’re not happy about that. That’s what matters.

“But I won’t break my promise.” You squeeze his arm. “I promised you I would try, and ever since that night, I’ve done my best to keep to that, and I always will.” His nose bumps against yours, trying to get you to look at you and you do, suddenly aware of the lack of space between you. “I have someone to come home to now.”

Your eyebrows furrow, and your heart pounds against your rib cage. You’re no longer okay being just friends with Dick, not when he says things like that and when he’s looking at you like this either—like you’re the only thing that matters and all he wants is to keep you trapped in his arms (you wouldn’t fight him if he tried).

Before you can voice anything, coherent or incoherent, your mouth is sealed shut by a paid of chapped lips. It’s a small peck, but it’s enough to send a tumble of acrobats into a frenzy. And all you want is to feel his lips against yours again, and so you meet him halfway after a shallow collection of breath.

Lips move in tandem, heads tilting this way and that and it’s all very much like the passionate romcom movie kisses you’ve seen over the years, the kind you’d dream about every time Dick would kiss different parts of your face and never your lips. It’s all fire and sweetness, like fireworks on a hot summers’ day and watermelon juice dripping down your chin.

A loud boom echoes in the quiet night and you jerk away from Dick, eyes snapping to his bedroom entrance, the windows covered with blinds allowing the bright flashes of light to filter in.

“Did we miss the countdown?” you find yourself asking dumbly, a little breathless and mind still reeling from his intense kiss.

He presses another one to your temple, chuckling. “Does it matter?”

“It’s the New Year!” 

“Could really care less,” he grumbles, voice coming from deep in his chest as his lips dragging from the corner of your eyes to your lips, pulling you away from the firework show outside. “Too busy trying to make out with my gorgeous girlfriend.”

“Girlfriend, huh?” you tease in between kisses.

“Mhmm, have been trying to make her mine for a couple of months now, but she’s pretty clueless. ‘S supposed to be one of the best reporters in all of the tri state area, too.”

“Should’ve said something, Dick. I’m not a mind reader.”

He chuckles, pulling away from your lips for just a moment. “There’s something else you should know.”

“What?” you ask, a little hazily.

“I was Robin.”

And before you can ask him to elaborate on that or you’re allowed to be embarrassed, he closes the distance between you once more and kisses you senseless.

To think you thought you’d regret going to Megan’s a little over a year ago; if only the you from then could see you now, happy and moved on.

#dick grayson x reader #richard dick grayson x reader #robin x reader #nightwing x reader #dick grayson x you #dick grayson x y/n #reader insert #young justice #titans #fanfic #young justice fic #titans fic

[sympathyfortheblinderdevil]

All Is Fair: Chapter 15 Three Little Words

Lia makes up with Jenny the buzzkill (but she seems like she has changed) and gets an amazing offer from London. Tommy says the three little words we would all kill to hear him say to us.

What a difference a day made Twenty-four little hours Brought the sun and the flowers Where there used to be rain

Lia met Jenny for lunch. A frisson of nervousness followed by warmth ran through Lia when she spotted Jenny at a table near the window. She stood and watched as Jenny spooned sugar into her tea, then a splash of milk before stirring it counterclockwise three times. Lia sighed and mused that some things never change, and she was suddenly struck by how much she missed those predictable little mannerisms which she had never noticed before. She was able to observe her for a few moments more before Jenny looked up and saw her standing in the entrance to the dining room. She waved and gave Lia a tentative smile as she moved toward the table.

“I ordered tea already…” Jenny started.

“Thank God. I’m in desperate need of a cuppa.”

Jenny poured Lia a cup. “Two sugars and a splash, right...”

Lia nodded and overlapped her words with, “...If you haven’t ordered yet, the ham salad is good here.”

“Oh, the waitress will be back around. I told her I was waiting for someone.”

They were both silent for a moment, avoiding each other’s eyes and sipping at their tea, until Lia softly chuckled and said, “I’m sorry… for everything.”

Jenny reached across the table and squeezed her hand. “Me too. You know how I can get.”

“How have you been?”

“Oh, I’ve been alright. It’s been a bit quieter without you around.” Jenny looked into Lia’s eyes thoughtfully. “How are things in your new place?”

“Good. More room than I am accustomed to having.”

The waitress came and took their orders, which gave them both a moment to breathe. The air between them had grown pregnant with the question that Jenny had not yet asked. When the waitress walked away, Lia could feel it coming.

“How are things between you and Tommy?”

Lia felt like a dam about to burst. She longed to fill Jenny in on every detail of the past months. She wanted to gush bout how Tommy had put her in a house with more rooms than she could possibly use and that the bathroom had a huge marble tub. She was dying to say that he took care of her and made sure she had everything that she needed. She wanted to tell her that Tommy had taken her to London and had given her a gorgeous diamond necklace. That he was protective and thoughtful with her, and he wanted her to go to all sorts of swish parties...but she held back, for now.

She smiled over her teacup and simply said, “Things are going very well.”

There. The subject had been broached and any hint of static had been deflected. Part of Lia wished she could pour her heart out, to tell her all the good things and all of her worries, but she thought better of it. Lia had already begun to dismiss her own feelings about how Tommy was involved in every corner of her life.

The more she thought about opening up to Jenny, the more her heart justified Tommy’s actions. After all, he wasn’t doing anything wrong. She didn’t want their first contact in months to be a verification of Jenny’s earlier suspicions: the ones that had caused the rift between them in the first place. She didn’t want Jenny to feel as though she had only wanted to meet because she was having second thoughts about being with Tommy. Most of all, she wanted Jenny to know that she was happy with Tommy...and most of the time she was.

The food came and they soon fell into an easy conversation, catching up on everything that had gone on since they last spoke. Jenny’s said that her promotion was going well and that she had recently gotten a significant pay raise. Lia wondered if talk of Jenny’s Shelby connection had, at last, died down, but she didn’t dare ask. Lia mentioned her work with the manuscript collection and how she hoped that it would lead to archival work with a museum. Jenny seemed relieved that Lia was still following her dreams.

Soon the talk turned to family and the upcoming holidays.

“Are you spending the holidays with the Shelbys, then?”

“I haven’t seen Mum and Dad for ages. I plan on going home for Christmas and spending Boxing Day with Tommy.”

Jenny was pleased to hear it. It made her think that maybe Lia was keeping her head where Tommy was concerned, after all.

“I plan on taking the evening train home after work on the 23rd. We should travel together.” Lia suggested.

They parted with a promise to meet soon to plan their trip home. It was such a relief to Lia that she had her cousin in her life again. She loved Tommy, and his family had been very welcoming to her, but she needed her own family too. She supposed that blood really was thicker than water.

***

Rodney whistled as he pulled up to the curb in front of Lia’s house and engaged the brake. He came around to open Lia’s door and help her with the packages she had bought at the market after work.

She walked through the house flipping on lights, and called over her shoulder, “Thank you so much, Rodney. Just bring them through to the kitchen. Have you picked out anything special for Nancy’s Christmas?”

Rodney’s fiance, Nancy, was the apple of his eye, and he never tired of talking about her.

“Of course! She’s mad for jazz music so I got her some albums. I’ve got my eye on a pair of ear bobs too. Then there are sweets for stocking stuffers…”

Lia pulled a rose out of the bouquet she had bought for the table. “Here, take this home to her tonight,” she winked. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

With not a moment to spare, she began preparing the food. Tommy would be there in an hour, and she wanted time to relax and have a drink before he arrived. While she tied on an apron and placed the flowers in a vase, she found herself whistling the same tune that Rodney had been whistling. Her outlook had much improved from the day before. She had gotten some good news at work, and she couldn’t wait to share it with Tommy.

With supper in the oven, she poured herself a whiskey and water (Tommy’s habits were rubbing off on her) and went into the bathroom to freshen up. She blotted her lipstick and dabbed a bit of perfume behind her ears. The look that she wore to work was a bit demure, so she undid a few buttons and took the pins from her hair. She liked to look undone and soft for Tommy. Everything in his world was hard—business, politics, managing his family— she could be sharp when he needed her to be, but at home she was soft.

As she walked back through the house, she cut the bright lights out, turned on a few dim lamps, and lit some candles. Finally, she reclined on the couch and put her feet up. The ice in her glass tinkled when she took a sip of her whiskey; that and the crackle of the fire were the only sounds in her house. She lolled her head back against the couch and closed her tired eyes. The smell of roast beef and vegetables began to waft through the house, ensuring that when Tommy walked in he would be cocooned in the warmth and comfort of Lia’s home. Nothing could feel more perfect, well, except maybe Tommy sitting at the opposite end of the couch rubbing she sore feet.

When he let himself into Lia’s house, Tommy followed the candlelight to the front sitting room where she lay. Lia had dozed off, and her whiskey was balanced on her tummy with her hands still cradling the glass. It rose and fell comically with every breath she took. Tommy raised one corner of his lips and walked over to the couch. As he eased himself down on the end opposite Lia, he gently raised her feet and placed them in his lap. He caressed her leg and she opened her eyes just a crack. A lazy smile crept across her face when she saw that Tommy was gazing down on her with a lopsided smirk on his face.

“Long day?” he murmured.

“Definitely an eventful one.”

“You must tell me all about it.” He sniffed at the air and cocked his head toward the kitchen. “Is that roast beef with carrots and onions?”

Lia stretched and pulled herself up to a sitting position, “Yes, it is. Come on, love. I’ll tell you all about it over supper.”

Tommy stood and took her hands, pulling her up from the couch and into his arms. He was glad to see that Lia had gotten over the mood that she had been in the day before. He smoothed her hair back from her face and caressed her cheeks with the backs of his hands.

“Thank you.”

Lia looked up at him through wide eyes. “For what?”

He shifted a glance around the room, and the looked deep into her eyes. He squeezed her shoulders as he spoke. “For this. All of this. The peace, the calm, the love... I love you.”

Lia’s breath caught in her throat, and she stood for a moment in stunned silence. Tommy had, occasionally, called her “Love”, in that offhand way that people use the word as a term of endearment. “Hand me that book, Love. Do you want to go out or stay in for dinner, Love? Careful that you don’t step in that pile of horseshit, Love.” But, that was casual. Everyone said “Love” like that. This was a declaration of love.

“I love you too,” she breathed with a sigh.

This was everything she wanted. He had asked her to be his companion to public events, given her a substantial piece of jewelry, and now he had said those three little words. Both publicly and privately, Tommy was showing her that she was more than just a distraction. Maybe she was being unfair when she worried about him taking control of so many things. He obviously wanted to make her happy.

Once in the kitchen, Tommy sat at the table and pulled a cigarette out of the case. “Flowers? To what do I owe the honor?”

Lia pulled the cigarette out of his mouth and laid it aside before he could light the end, and said, “Don’t light that. We are eating right now. I thought flowers were appropriate for my news. I wanted tonight to be special.”

“Go on...”

“I decided to bury the hatchet with Jenny today.” She turned back to the sideboard and fixed two plates as she spoke.

“Yeah?” Tommy’s voice pitched higher than usual.

He didn’t mind that Lia had reconciled with Jenny, he just didn’t see it coming, and it was rare that he didn’t see something coming. He slid the cigarette back into the case and watched her bring the plates over to the table.

“How is Jenny?”

“Jenny is well. She has had a promotion and a raise,” she replied after chewing up a bit of the roast. “You may want to salt yours. I never know what’s enough.”

Tommy took a mouthful and replied, “Mmmmmm. Nah, it’s perfect. So, all is forgiven between the two of you?”

“I think so. She seems to understand what you mean to me. I got the impression that she trusts you with my heart, now.” Lia looked up at Tommy for some reassurance.

Tommy took a drink and returned her stare. “And do you?”

She was quiet for a beat. She searched his face, taking in the scar just below his cheekbone, the darkness under his eyes, and the scruff on his razor-sharp jawline. He had come to her at the end of a long day to sit at her table. Exhausted from too much business, too many people depending on him, and too little sleep, he chose not to go to his estate, nor to go to the midland for a quick fuck and an empty bed...for some unfathomable reason, he chose her. This man, this sinful sainted man, who had committed innumerable acts of violence and few acts of kindness, asked if she trusted him with her heart.

Lia leaned over to kiss his cheek and whispered, “Of course, I do.” How could she ever doubt him?

“May I smoke now?”

“Yes, Tommy. God, you can be so dramatic,” she chuckled under her breath.

She cleared the plates as he took the whiskey and their glasses back to the sitting room. When Lia followed after, he had shed his coat, vest, and gun holster and had undone his tie. He was squatting down to put another log on the fire and she slipped up behind him to run her fingers through his dark hair.

“So tell me, what was your other news?” he spoke, not shifting his eyes from the fire.

“I’ve had an intriguing offer from our London branch.”

Tommy stood and turned to face her. “London?”

“Yes. The branches are all connected through the National System...well, anyway, someone at the London branch in Westminster had a glowing recommendation from one of the professors I’ve helped and they want me to work on a special project.”

“Well, that’s good news indeed. When?”

Lia grinned and wrapped her arms around his neck. “Just after the first of the year, Tommy. I’ll be in London with you.”

Tommy leaned in to kiss her, then wrapped her in his arms to pull her closer.

Lia spoke against his neck, “I am so excited. Its all worked out perfectly.”

She had no idea what he and Ada had done.

Masterlist

#peaky blinders #tommy shelby #peaky blinders fiction #peaky blinders fic #tommy shelby fic #tommy shelby x oc #all is fair

[johannas-motivational-insults]

Hi this is CatraCorner962! Can I get a commentary of the latest chapter of Live With It where Adora and Catra briefly reunite? Thank you so much! ☺️🙏🏼

@catracorner962 sorry for the delay, here it is. I’m just doing the snippet you most wanted to see because otherwise it will take too long. (Commentary is bolded.)

Man this whole scene/chapter is heartbreaking. Cathartic and healing in a way but it also really hurts. I mean I’m usually more into hurt/comfort than pure angst and I guess this fic is how I dealt with the pure angst of the original oneshot it’s based off of. Anyway, this is a conversation they really needed to have, and since they didn’t get to in life I gave it to them posthumously.

First of all, I would like to brag for writing the following line long before season 5 came out:

“I’m sorry too,” says Catra, holding her gaze intently. “For everything.”

Now skipping ahead to the snippet in question...

It’s several moments before a concrete thought finally crystallizes in Adora’s head, making her eyes flit to Catra with a frown. “How do you know how I feel?”

Turning her head, Catra blinks. “What?”

“You said I feel sad and guilty all the time. How did you know?”

“You mean besides knowing you like I do?” teases Catra. (Ooo, that is what my fellow Millennials would call a sick burn.) Her eyes flick back up to the stars, voice going solemn. “When the living think or speak of me, I hear them. That’s… that’s why I can forgive you. I never understood how you felt before. I didn’t want to understand.” Her throat bobs as she turns back to Adora.

Look, we all know if Catradora had just fucking talked to each other about how they really felt instead of hiding behind a bunch of posturing the series would’ve been over really quick. Especially if they’d had a mediator to help translate given their different values and communication styles. But if Catra had ever known just how much Adora loved and missed her, things would have been so different. I’m just really glad canon turned out the way it did, not like this.

“I… I get that,” admits Adora. “I was hurt when you didn’t come with me the first time, and I didn’t even try to understand why. It was easier to write you off as evil, like the rest of the Horde. But when you saved me in the Fright Zone, then in the Crystal Castle, I couldn’t believe that anymore. I realized I never should have stopped trying.” (A little too late. Look, I still stand by my comments that Adora did not do enough early on to try to repair their friendship and it really widened the rift between them.) Scoffing inwardly, Adora glares up at the stars. “Guess I didn’t learn my lesson after all.”

Catra shrugs with a half-hearted smile. “To be fair, I didn’t give you much motivation to keep trying.”

Regret aches in Adora’s chest, but it’s lingering heartbreak that makes her lip quiver and tears sting her eyes. This question has been killing Adora for a good seven years. She can’t very well not ask it now.

“Why didn’t you come with me? Did-” The word catches in Adora’s throat and she has to swallow. “Did you not love me enough?”

And likewise, if Adora had known just how much Catra loved and missed her, things would have also been different. Even in canon this miscommunication leads to so much tragedy.

Also, owwwww.

“What?” Catra is suddenly on her side, one ear raised in alarm as she stares down at Adora. “No, don’t say that. Don’t you ever say that,” she commands. (I love how she says this. That is the last thing Catra ever wants Adora to think.) When Adora says nothing, looking up at her with a mix of awe and fear, she sighs and lets her face go softer.

“Adora, I have loved you for as long as I can remember,” declares Catra. “The reasons I didn’t go, well… they weren’t great. First I was mad that you ran off and let me get punished for you, then I was mad you wouldn’t come back with me so I wouldn’t get punished more. And I was really, really mad that it had never occurred to you before that the people who raised us were evil, after everything they did to me. To us.” Catra blinks away, but not before Adora sees the pain in her eyes. “I knew you were right in wanting to leave, but I couldn’t understand why you’d never asked me earlier, why you only started caring when you saw other people getting hurt.”

This is Thaymor For Dummies/Catra 101. If you don’t understand this much, you’re not gonna understand her character or arc.

“I did care. It just… it seemed normal,” is the best defense Adora can come up with. “It was how things were. And I knew it wasn’t fair, but I didn’t know how to make it right. Before that day I thought the outside world was full of princesses and other hostiles who would eat us alive. I didn’t even know there was hope for a life anywhere else.” (Having grown up in a toxic religious bubble I absolutely understand this aspect of Adora’s defection and it needed to be said.) Her eyes fall to the ground in shame. “I tried to protect you from Shadow Weaver, but it was never enough. I’m sorry.”

Gentle fingers tilt her chin up, calling her eyes back to Catra’s. “Hey, listen, that’s not your fault,” Catra assures her. “Okay? That was her fault, Adora, not yours. She was going to hurt me no matter what either of us did. (Hindsight is 20/20, huh Catra?) She despises me, always has and always will.” (Ah, or deathsight should I say? That mindreading comes in handy.) Catra’s gaze goes distant for a moment. “Thanks for what you said to her, by the way. Back at the wake.”

Adora blinks, struggling to even recall the conversation beyond a lot of yelling and the gut punch of a reminder that she was to blame for much of Catra’s pain. In her defense, she’d eaten a large hallucinogenic root all at once and was really fucking high. (We needed a dash of levity in this heavy chapter, so voila.) “Which part?”

The corner of Catra’s mouth twitches up into a soft smile. “I’m just glad you remember the real me,” she says. “Not just the me who destroyed the world, the,” she flops onto her back with emphatic jazz hands, “‘evil stain on Etheria.’” There’s a bitter undertone of seriousness in her voice that makes Adora frown.

Rolling onto her side, Adora lays a hand on Catra’s stomach. “You were hurting. No one showed you any compassion, not even me. Not when you really needed it.”

I mean Scorpia did I guess but tbh Scorpia didn’t understand what was going on, and it’s hard to show meaningful compassion when you don’t understand a situation or know why someone is hurting. This is more in reference to Shadow Weaver and Glimmer, and Adora herself. And it’s not totally accurate but it’s Adora’s perception of the situation long after.

“Doesn’t make any of it right,” Catra says to the sky. She sighs heavily, and when she finally meets Adora’s gaze there’s a sheen of unshed tears in her eyes. “I can never make it right, but I wish I could. You know?”

“Yeah, I do know,” Adora tells her. “That’s how I feel too. But I guess you already know that.”

Catra nods wordlessly, and Adora doesn’t know what else to say, so she lies back down.

God this is so tragic. They both see their own faults now but it’s past the point where they can make it up to each other and anyone else they hurt (in Catra’s case). I am so grateful that in canon we got to see them growing together at the end, coming back from their individual journeys in a position to be better for each other now.

And yes, I do still plan to finish this fic but it’s hard to write something that’s such a downer after the happy ending we got. Much of the next chapter is already written, though. Mermista is Adora’s therapist. ;)

#ask games #director's commentary #fanfic #writing #live with it #asks #catracorner962

[marveldc-imagines-hub]

That’s Not a Real Kiss (Telltale John Doe x Reader)

A/N: Here’s a thing nobody asked for that I’ve had on my mind literally since I created this blog. I love soft John Doe and just want him to be happy because Harley’s abusive and Bruce is a jackass; you’re welcome.

My take on the Telltale Harley Quinn/Joker dynamic is that it’s essentially a switcheroo on the regular representation of the couple, with John Doe being the unstable but more or less well-meaning pushover and Harley being the manipulative, abusive mastermind. With a side of Bruce also being kind of a dumpster fire of a character, in my opinion. I just mention this because I recently realized that this apparently isn’t the most popular take on Telltale’s Joker and a good portion of people still think he’s the main mastermind and has Harley wrapped around his finger. To each their own.

Word count: 1999 (2001 before editing; longer than what I usually write, woo)

Summary: You’ve been close friends with John for a while now, but have grown tired of his blind affections for people didn’t seem to think nearly as highly of him. During another late night of listening to him fawn over Harley and Bruce, you end up deciding to confront him--and corner yourself into confessing your own feelings for him in the process.

Warnings: Mentions of abuse (nothing too graphic), a bit of a cliffhanger? (I might make a sequel if people are interested); I started this months ago and just continued/finished it at three am this morning, so while I did edit it and al that jazz, there may still be the occasional grammar error and choppy writing. That being said, I did also try to write it in a way that felt lengthy and breathless and jumpy? I guess? In hopes of portraying how the reader was feeling and the way their brain was buzzing out of nervousness. Lemme know how I did.

Like what I do? Leave me a tip!

~~~~~

You sat crouched against the wall of John Doe’s scrappy home within the warehouse hideout of the criminal group he’d decided to attach himself to, a scowl etched into your features as you watched him flamboyantly pace around. Seeing him so happy would normally make you happy too, and if he wasn’t talking about the two most manipulative people in his life like they were gods, you would have been. Unfortunately, though, Harley and Bruce were the ones bringing that adorable grin to his face, so you sat unenthusiastically nursing the drink John had provided and stewing in a mental pool of God, I wish that were me.

Then, against your better judgement, you decided to do something about it.

“Hey, Johnny.” You placed your drink down with a hard clink against the concrete floor and glanced up at the man, who had stopped his affectionate rambling with an embarrassed grin; god, you loved that grin. Most people found it unnerving, saying that paired with his paper pale skin it made John look like the living dead--or a clown if they were a crackhead. You, however, found it fitting for him, a strangely cute smile for a strangely cute man. You just wished you were the cause of it more often.

You also wished that what you were going to say wouldn’t result in an argument but you knew it probably would anyway. Shaking aside your butterfly-stirring thoughts and grumbling--partially in case Harley or her criminal buddies were still wandering around the warehouse at this hour, mainly because you’d almost immediately lost all the confidence you had about five seconds ago--you repeated, “Hey, Johnny--”

“Hey, [Y/N/N],” John chirped back, relaxing enough to take a seat on an overturned crate across from you. Curiosity and a bit of confusion sparkled in his green-gray eyes, and his head was tilted slightly to the side. He looked like a puppy; a sweet, dorky, green-haired, white-skinned, horribly lost puppy. One of those pretty soft eyes was still purple-black and partially swollen shut, a punishment from Harley Quinn herself after John had gotten a little too excited and caused a mission earlier today to turn sour. Better than getting a bullet through the eye instead, though that thought didn’t make you feel much better about it.

Still, he smiled, shining like a ray of sun in the dark chaos that was Gotham these days. Still, he fawned over Harley and treated her like a queen. 

The idea of it made you want to hurl. You could almost feel the frown lines etching themselves into your skin. 

“Why do you like either of them?” you blurted, louder than you had meant to and apparently cutting John off from speaking at the same time; his lips had parted and one of his hands had risen just as words were pouring from your own mouth.

John’s response was a blink, then a chuckle, then that rubbing of the back of his neck that he did when he was flustered. He’d blush if he could, but he couldn’t so he started talking instead. “Well, as I was saying--”

You winced at the slow way he’d said ‘saying,’ like he was annoyed that you’d prevented him from continuing his love-struck rant about a couple of bullies. “You know what I mean, John. I don’t want you to go off on another tangent. We’ve talked about this before.”

It’s true. Despite your unwillingness, this wasn’t the first time you’d gotten enough courage to call John out on his self-destructive bullshit. You’d initially joined The Pact because you had had nowhere else to go at the time, a Gotham newbie with no money but with an attitude and a penchant for eavesdropping and minor pickpocketing--the key was to return the wallet from the person you’d taken it from, acting like they’d dropped it during you bumping into them; everyone in Gotham was too busy to check if anything was missing right then, and you were bland enough in appearance to have basically disappeared and been forgotten by the time they’d noticed. Sometimes, if you were lucky, you might even be mistaken for a homeless ragamuffin and given more money than what you stole from a particularly sympathetic victim.

By the time you’d impressed Harley enough to join her squad of crazy, saving you from sleeping at bus stops and bathing in sinks at gas stations, John Doe was showing up with his friend. His friend Bruce Wayne, AKA Batman--it wasn’t difficult to figure out who the man behind the mask was, if you were really looking; the fact was that no one in Gotham really wanted to ruin the illusion--who you soon realized wasn’t really a friend at all. Like Harley, Bruce used John as pawn at every turn, and you, who had made friends with the lively man pretty easily, couldn’t stand it; you’d quickly learned that John was brilliantly clever, entertaining, had a very intriguing set of gray morals, and was almost completely unaware of the poor treatment he was receiving. After a few weeks of enduring the irritation of watching two mightier-than-thou Gothamites treating your friend like a doormat with the intelligence of a box of rocks, and in some cases saving him from and nursing him back to health after suffering Harley’s wrath, you decided to put on your adult pants and deal with the problem head on: showing John what he was avoiding seeing and hoping to whatever being of high power that he believed you.

At some point among the many high-energy, zany moments you’d experienced with John, but more likely during one of the few gentler, more caring ones, you had caught feelings for the bizarre but lovely man. This realization had you further searching for shooting stars, tossing pennies into fountains, praying, doing whatever else you thought may help every time you every time you considered talking with him about his toxic loved ones. Silently begging that he wouldn’t get so upset with you that he’d decide to completely cut ties with you, or worse--tell Harley what you’d been trying to do, most likely resulting in your corpse being thrown off a Gotham pier. 

Now John sat across from you, his long-fingered hands fiddling with each other and his purple-shoed foot tapping and his pale gaze shifting to look anywhere but at you as he considered what to say. You could almost see the gears turning in his head, trying to figure out how to explain his love for an abuser and a manipulator without losing the one person who never seemed to grow tired of him.

“[Y/N],” he finally drawled, hesitant, then with a chuckle, “I know you don’t like them but they’re great guys, really; you just need to give them a chance. Harls? She can be real sweet, as long as you stay on her good side and do what she says. And Bruce! Sure, he’s a little grumbly around the edges but--”

“John,” you cried softly, desperately, and rose to your feet. In a few steps you were right in front of him, kneeling and gently pressing a hand to the side of his face that was still bruised. Your face was twisted in pain, none felt for yourself, as you brushed a hand over the surprisingly cool but still puffy skin under his black eye; you looked directly into it, a half moon of silvery green almost hidden by purple flesh, as you continued, “Bruce is a rich boy with a hero complex doing whatever he needs to do and screwing over people he doesn’t think matters in order to finish a mission. Harley Quinn is a menace. She would have smashed your head in if I hadn’t distracted her with new mission plans; that wasn’t even twenty-four hours ago! The bruises from her almost strangling you because you went out to the carnival with me without telling her are just now beginning to fade. I didn’t get a punishment like that, and you know why? Because she thinks I’m useful and she thinks you’re a toy that she can play with and then throw away whenever she wants. She knows you worship the ground she walks on, but I’ve seen you noticing that you don’t deserve the treatment she’s dealing out. People who love you don’t treat you like that, John. Bruce and Harley don’t care about you. They don’t love you. They’re not even your friends.”

Emotionally exhausted and scared that you had crossed a line you shouldn’t have, you ended your speech with a slow breath. You took a moment to look away, shake off the feeling of your eyes burning. You only looked back at John when you felt his cold hand on yours, felt his face lean into your warm palm.

The green-ette who was all limbs and jawline--he looked more like a deer in headlights than a curious puppy now--was watching you, his eyes wide and conflicted. He seemed to be struggling to say something again; you could feel his hands quivering and see him chewing the inside of his cheek in thought. Then he blinked, pressed his cheek more securely into your hand, and asked in the quietest voice you’ve ever heard him use, “Do you?”

You grew more flustered and confused the longer the moment stretched on, and it was your turn to tilt your head slightly. “Do I…?”

“You said they don’t love me,” John clarified, and you felt your mouth go dry. “You said people who love me don’t treat me like that. You’ve never treated me like that.” 

Attempting to bring moisture back to your mouth in order to protest, to deny the truths John was claiming, only resulted in what you assumed was pretty unattractive grumble and cough. Not that you thought John would care; you knew he wouldn’t. You did, however, realize that talking was futile, so you took a moment to think of the next best thing. Just as John began to start a new thought again, just as doubt began to blossom in his eyes, you decided to throw all caution to the wind and kiss him.

A small kiss. A very slight brush of the lips. And not on his lips, but right in the center of his forehead.

There was a moment of silence, another excruciatingly long one that briefly made you feel like you were having a heart attack, until you felt the brush of eyelashes on your jaw when John blinked once again.

“That’s not a real kiss.”

You could help bark a short laugh at the pouty tone your friend’s--friend?--voice had. You began to sit back on your heels, apologizing more about the fact that you had kissed John at all than because he’d considered the kiss ‘fake.’ Before you could pull away fully, however, you felt chilly hands make their way from your arm to your shoulder, then to your neck and jaw, pulling you closer. You hadn’t noticed that you had closed your eyes until you opened them again, and then inhaled sharply. You saw the look on John’s face, something new and breathtaking and lacking any of the sadness or doubt that was usually there lately, and smelled a faint cologne all around you--did he always wear that?--and finally felt his breath on your lips when he spoke again. 

“It’s okay,” he said, responding to your apology. Pulling you ever closer--you could brush noses and lips now, and even though you felt your eyes flutter shut again but could still see that face behind your lids--he continued, “I’ll do it.”

You weren’t sure, as John’s lips met yours, where this kiss would take you or where the man’s thoughts were at. All you did know was that your doubts of having a chance with John flew right out the window at you leaned into his touch, and that if Harley wanted a fight for him, you’d give her a war.

#telltale #telltale batman #telltale john doe #telltale joker #john doe x reader #john doe imagines #john doe headcanons #telltale x reader #telltale imagines #telltale headcanons #telltale batman x reader #telltale batman imagines #telltale batman headcanons #telltale john doe x reader #telltale john doe imagines #telltale john doe headcanons #telltale joker x reader #telltale joker imagines #telltale joker headcanons #telltale harley quinn #telltale bruce wayne #dc #dc x reader #dc imagines #dc headcanons #telltale batman john doe x reader

[nosferatyou]

New Tune: Chapter 6 (Jake Kiszka x Reader)

WC: 6k (damn I went off)

Warnings: Cursing, Drug use, rock and roll, romantic tension, and a very sweet moment

Summary: Two guitarists meet at a Rock Festival, only having a week with each other before they have to return to their own lives. The bond they create is unfeigned and resolute

AUTHORS NOTE:I listened to an ungodly amount of John Denver while writing this. Also never written a scene like the last before soo that's fun.

 I wanted to try to give them two different styles that represented the characters, and I think I got it. I always saw Jake’s more of a mess, but its still in harmony. While hers is more like mine, a need for perfection, never fully happy with the final product. But there's my rendition of reader and Jake! I hope its satisfactory (also breaking away from your art style is very hard, but hella fun)

***

After she left last night all the boys couldn’t stop gushing about Y/N, well more couldn't stop making fun of me. Holding my newfound feelings for her above my head. Sam and Danny were acting out the night before, but wildly blew it out of proportion.

Sam and Danny were sitting incredibly close on the couch, each hand intertwined with the other boys.  Looking at each other with loving eyes, and the occasional dramatic, love struck sigh coming from Sam. 

“Oh Y/N, the way you wield your axe is just so sexy.” Sam said to Danny, trying to replicate my voice, but was so dramatic about it he was nowhere close.

“Not as sexy as you not making a move.” Danny said with a skewed high pitch voice.

The two boys pressed their cheeks and looked at me, batting their lashes, holding back a laugh.

“If only I didn’t have a mean old boyfriend holding me back from this sexy-” Danny was cut off by me standing from my spot and grabbing my lighter and Cigs.

“Real comedians you guys are.”

I was met with my twin, Josh, already out there seemingly enjoying the morning air.

I looked over and met his gaze, a bright smile adorning his face.

“Well good morning, little bro.”

I grumbled “by five minutes.” Under my breath. I took a spot next to him, leaning against the bus and lighting a cigarette, taking a big hit before finally exhaling.

He looked over to me with more than confusion than previously. 

“Something on your mind? Or should I say Someone on your mind?” A small sympathetic smile following the question.

I took a final drag and put out my cig, turning my full attention towards him.

“Sam and Danny are just doing their normal shit. I love them, but goddamn, they're getting on my nerves.”

“Are you sure that’s all that’s bothering you?” 

I focused on the cigarette butt on the ground, kicking it aimlessly.

“We both know that's not all that’s bothering me.”

He nudged my shoulder and gave the smile as before. “Well let it all out. Tell me about her.”

“You’ve already met her, dumbas-”

He cut me off saying “Well I know about her, but tell me how you feel about her. Dumbass.”

I gave a small laugh and looked back up at my twin.

“ She’s just- Nothing i've ever experienced. She’s got such a diverse taste in everything. She listens to everything we do, all the Jazz, folk, and so on, but then there's everything else. If she knew every word to every song I wouldn't be surprised.” 

I looked back up to josh and the smile on his face had grown. He nodded his head as if to say “Go on”

“And the sheer talent in this girl. You saw her yesterday, so you know. She can play anything man I swear. We spent about three hours playing nonstop and she did it like it was nothing. Did you know she can play like 7 instruments? Its fucking crazy. Plus the way she works with that bow is something else, maybe it's because she has cello experience. She probably has jimmy page impressed.”

 I trailed off for a moment, just thinking about her. My cheeks grew warm and flushed red. 

“She’s also so compassionate, you can tell she really cares. Despite her nonchalant demeanor she secretly goes out of her way to make sure everyones okay. She never told me that, but I can just tell.” 

“You really like her don't you?” Josh asked.

“ I really fucking like her, Josh.” 

After our chat Josh suggested that I spend all the time I can with her, make my mark, so here I am at her door, praying she’s there. With my supplies in hand, I freed my hand to knock on their door. Eventually the door swung open to Y/N with a somber face, but it brightened a bit when she realized it was me. Wearing comfier clothes then she had previously worn.

“Well hey there, Rockstar. Didn't think I’d see you till later.”

“Well I’m here now, and I brought something that'll hopefully cheer you up.”

She raised her eyebrows and noticed what I had in my arms.

“Oh?”

“Let me inside and I'll show you.” I playfully winked.

She laughed and walked up the stairs, letting me in. I walked in, shutting the door behind me, and found her sitting on the couch, knees tucked under her arms.

“Well are you just going to stand there staring, or are you going to show me what you brought?”

She asked, cocking an eyebrow.

I sat down across from her at the table, dumping all the stuff on it. A way too big sketchbook, a huge pencil bag, and gummy bears for good measure.

She stood up and her meek smile grew.

“How’d you know that I could draw?” 

“I just somehow knew a lady of many talents, such as yourself, was probably talented with a pencil as well.”

 She grabbed the huge bag and searched through until she was satisfied. Opened it up to the next blank page and opened the gummy bears for good measure.

She looked up to me with a confused look. 

“What are you still doing over here? Grab the guitar and provide some good tunes while you model for me.” 

I laughed and grabbed the guitar that was in its case next to me. I moved to the couch and unpacked it while asking, “Should I stay still if I’m you’re model?”

Without looking up from the sketch pad, she said, “Nah I should be fine. Just make sure to play something good.”

She looked up at me giving a brighter smile, and refocusing on the task at hand. 

We sat quietly for about 45 minutes, her looking up at me from time to time. Sometimes I’d make a silly face, and make her laugh. Soon after though she would return to her work, not even looking up to grab more candy. When she really focused on her work she’d scrunch up on corner of her mouth. Sometimes she’d bite her lip, back up the paper, then would go to erase something. She never failed to mindlessly hum along to songs though, only proving my point from this morning. 

She finally backed the paper up one final time before clicking her tongue, her eyes lighting up.

“I think I got your essence perfectly.”

She flipped it around to show me, nervousness flashing in her eyes for a moment.

I was completely blown away. She had completely nailed it. It only made my heart swell more.

She flipped it back around to look at it again “I think I kind of messed up your face a little in the big one. Sorry about that.”

“No no! It looks absolutely perfect and I’m not at all surprised. You did good, seriously. Y/N it looks fantastic.” I gushed, my cheeks growing pink.

Her cheeks grew pink and refocused on the drawing in front of her. She grabbed the pencil and eraser and continued to poke at her piece, never content with her own work.

After a little while I moved the guitar off my lap and moved towards her to nab the items out of her hands. I swiftly grabbed them and hid them behind my back, a pert smile on my lips..

“Hey! I was using those you know.” She said, holding her hand out as to ask for them back.

I quickly shook my head and said “You think I’m just going to give these to you? It's already perfect, there's nothing more to fix.”

She turned her head down with a sad look adorning her face, but I caught the mischievous grin poking through. “Fine then.”

“You're really not great at faking it, darling. I see that little smile on your face.”

She lightly chuckled and suddenly jumped up out of her seat to grab the items from behind me, but just as swiftly as she lept, I took a big step backwards.

“Gotta try harder than that, Little Bird.” I moved my hand above my head, and wiggled the pencils in the air enticingly. 

She looked up at the items and then back at me, a smug look on her face.

“You may be a big rockstar and all..” She paused and easily reached up, grabbing them out of my hands. “But I'm still taller than you.” She went to sit behind me on the couch in my previous spot, but not without ruffling my hair in a teasing manner. 

“You did your best, buddy.”

I whipped around and dramatically put my hands on my hips. “I totally went easy on you.”

“Sure, Rockstar.” She said, grabbing the guitar from beside her, strumming a few chords.

I grabbed all the essentials off the table, sketchbook, pencil bag, and of course the gummies. Then made my way to the couch, plopping down on her left side, dumping everything to my own. 

She stopped for a moment to try and hand me back the pencil and eraser, but I pushed her hand away and chuckled. 

“Don't you want these back, to you know, draw?” She asked.

“I prefer ink, but thank you, Little Bird.” I smiled.

We did the same as before, she modeled and provided tunes while I did my best to capture her. I knew we’d have different styles right away. You can tell she's a perfectionist in her work, not accepting flaws. I have messy lines, them almost seem alive with how fast I create them. I draw what I see, but add my own to it, depth can be something you make. So for the next hour or so I did my best to scratch out her beauty, mostly focusing on her face, which became apparent when I got a good look at it. I had been so careful with her face that the rest didn't seem to matter.

Id catch her glances every now and then, peaking at me over the guitar in curiosity. Every time I did I’d make a silly face, and every time she quietly laughed to herself with a content smile that follow. Every chance I could id try to catch her eyes just to see that. 

Halfway through her quiet rendition of “Dink's Song” I had finally finished her portrait. Which honestly didn’t compare to hers, but still, I was proud. I flipped it around to face her, and suddenly her singing stopped, her focus completely on the piece 

“Jake” She paused and grabbed it out of my hands, studying it more. 

“This is fucking fantastic.” She breathed out. Her eyes rapidly wandered the piece, trying to take it all in.

A small grin broke out on my face, and quietly fiddled with my hands, not wanting to interrupt her thoughts. 

She looked back up at me with wide, questioning eyes “How does no one know that you're this good?” She asked.

I chuckled and said “ Never seemed important to share. Its only a small hobby.”

“Only a small hobby.” She mocked. “As I said, this is fucking fantastic.”

“Well thank you, Little Bird.” A small blush forming on my cheeks.

“No, thank you, man.” She paused and moved the guitar to her side then grabbed my hand.

“No ones ever made me something like this. It’s absolutely beautiful.”

“Anything for you, Little Bird.” I said, and I meant every word.

She never let go of my hand, just sat back into her seat staring off in thought, I didn't mind the silence though. Until she asked

“Hey, Jake?”

“Yeah, Y/N?”

“I'm sorry I dragged you into that pit, I saw the way the media got a hold of it. I didn't want to make you uncomfortable.”

I squeezed her hand and caressed the back of it with my thumb. My heart was beating so hard, and I was incredibly nervous. She didn’t seem to mind at all though.

“Oh Little Bird, No darling this happens literally all the time. It’s nothing to stress over.”

“You sure?” She asked.

“Completely.” I paused for a moment “But I’m sorry it caused… you know. Boy trouble.”

She groaned and threw her head back “Oh god you head that?”

“Well when you yell that you’re not fucking Jimmy Page for everyone to hear its hard not to.” A playful smile on my lips. 

She groaned again and said “Oh god I’m sorry.”

“It's fine man, I get it all the time.. Well not the fucking part, but the Jimmy Page part.”

“She whipped her head to face me and quickly responded “No, not okay. You and Jimmy Page have completely different styles, and idiots like him who don't even listen to Greta have no say. I could go on about the technicalities of it all, but id probably bore you.” She paused and stared 

off for a moment for returning. “Plus I don't even think he listened to, nor liked zeppelin.”

“Well that's just blasphemous.” 

She laughed “You've got that right!”

“Wait shit do you have the time.”

I pulled my phone out of my pocket and turned it on, the screen flashed 4:30. I passed it over to her and as quickly as she read it, she popped up off the couch frantically.

“Shit! I have to get ready and go to sound check at 6!”

“Well go get ready then! Want me to wait?” I asked.

“Sure, but I can't promise that it will be very interesting.”

“I don't mind, after I can walk you to the venue if you'd like.”

She smiled and said “ And they say chivalry is dead.”

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

He was kind enough to wait around and watch me do my makeup for the next 30 minutes. I of course put a little eyeliner on him, he didn't ask but he didn't seem appalled at the idea. After all of that I quickly put on my stage clothes, which consisted of Dark blue high waisted bell bottoms, a simple blue velvet bralette, a black see through shirt with white embroidered flowers (fully unbuttoned of course, and purple paisley heels for some color. When I came out of the back and he saw what I was wearing he was not very suave about complimenting it. It was honestly pretty cute.

As promised he walked me to the venue, he even added my guitar to his already heavy load. Once we got there he sadly had to go because he had his own show to get ready for. He didn't leave without a hug and a wish for good luck before going to wherever he needed to be. 

One successful soundcheck later and we were all ready for the stage. 

Nerves jittered through the whole band, this was the biggest crowd we've ever played, and it's all thanks to the Greta boys. All of the people in the crowd were here to see them. 

5 minutes till we had to go on stage and Eli had taken a small glass jar with white contents inside out of his pocket, luckily we were alone in our dressing room. He asked Asa to hold up his bass for us as a makeshift table. He emptied enough for all of us to snort three lines.

 We all let him go first since it was his, with drug equity and all. Matt went next, not that he needed it, he was already so chaotic, but it's fun to all be high together. Eli took it from Asa and let him do his, then it was my turn. We used to do this a lot before shows, but recently with a break for recording its lessened. Still our tolerances were higher than the first time we all did it together. 

I bent down to snort the first line, the familiar smell of petrol hit my nose, and shortly after I felt the drug hit the back of the throat. It burned for a brief moment, but then I got that drip, my nose, tongue and throat went numb, which made it all the more easier for the next two lines.

I instantly felt that buzz, the high we’d all been chasing. We all went from nervous to ready to play in front of a million people. Matt jumped up and in tow we all did. Buzzing from our high.

 Id grabbed my guitar and slung it on my back, Eli did the same, then we all made our way to the main stage. We whooped and hollered, ready to take on our biggest show. In the wings I spotted the Greta boys and quickly made my way over to them.

“You look absolutely stunning, Darling!” Josh yelled at me.

I slung my arm over him for a quick hug and replied “Don't I know it, had to show off the goods somehow. I'm a free woman! Well not yet… But when I get a mic on my hands I will be dumping my bitch ass boyfriend.”

“Hell yeah! Fuck that guy!” Sam chimed in.

“Fuck that guy!” I pulled away from the hug and told josh “Dude your skin has what I can only describe as good vibes, man. Like a warm feeling. I have to apologize, I just did a couple lines of coke and I am feeling the buzz. Like, Jake, you look ethereal in this light right now. Absolutely stunning.”

He just laughed and said “Well i'm glad i can be described as ethereal.”

“I could honestly go on about it, but I think I have to go. I hope you all enjoy, and wish me luck!” 

Behind me I could hear someone say “One minute!” So I quickly darted back over to my band. 

We did our lucky chant, huddled, first all crouched low to the ground. The chant really isn’t all that intricate, we just go start chanting “Fuck” in a whisper, then gradually getting louder until we are screaming and jumping around, bumping into each other.

 As so we were screaming and knocking into each other, until we all chilled and got plugged up and ready to go.

We heard our bands name announced and made our way on stage. Cheers erupted from the crowd, which was huge might I add. With the coke I was ready to do anything, and this was going to be a breeze. 

Before we went on I asked Matt if I could introduced the first song and he very graciously agreed.

We took to our spots, and when the crowd quieted Matt did the introduction.

“Hello, California! We are so glad to be here, and fucking jam with you guys! But we have a guitarist who wants to introduce our first song.”

More cheers erupted from the crowd, but that didn't last long. I stepped up to the mic “Hello everyone! I really want to dedicate this to my boyfriend, Sam.”

My band all gave me the weirdest looks, but the crowd awed in response.

“I see those fucking looks you’re giving me guys. This goes out to my son of a bitch EX boyfriend who doesn't deserve this much woman! Fuck that guy! This ones called Innocent Sun.”

 For a third time the crowd erupted in cheers, this time just as excited as the first

I backed away, and our drummer Asa got the message, playing the count in. 

Despite the name of the song it was one of our angrier ones, which is why its at the top of the set. 

Eli and I came in with a heavier riff, and with the coke, physical touch was enhanced, so my guitar strings felt so weird it was a bit distracting. I didn’t mess it up but my head was out of it.

Matt was dancing wildly along to the music, whipping the microphone around like Roger Daltrey. While he sang he’d come up to all of us and try to interact. Like he and I would play back to back, and I’d sing with him from time to time. Typically he would run around and jump off the drum risers. 

By the end of the song the adrenaline of being on stage coerced with the drugs, creating something else. We all were doing new shit in every song. I was sticking new solos anywhere I could.  Matt attempted a backflip off one of the bigger amps, which he miraculously made. Eli at one point just slapped the shit out of his bass, which didn't sound too bad. Poor Asa couldn’t do too much from behind the drums, but his drum fills were phenomenal.

As a black sabbath type band we were getting strangely rowdy, and lucky for me I had a wireless set up. So during a solo in one of the heavier songs I did a guitar spin and everyone completely lost it. Lucky for me I had taken off my loose shirt earlier in the set. 

After I had winked at the Greta boys in the wings and they lost their shit, all cheering me on. I felt like I was on cloud nine.

My heart was pounding, my ears were ringing, and I felt like I could take on the world. I was creating new licks, killing solos, and giving off some pretty damn good stage presence. But I was starting to come off of my high, and all of those pent up feelings were starting to come out. Lucky for me our last song is when we covered “Dazed and Confused”, it didn't run as long as Zeppelin played it live but its longer than anything else we played. 

When we got to the guitar solo in the song I grabbed the bow behind my pedal board and stuck my pick between my lips, quickly switching on a bunch of delay effects. 

 I gave it one test stroke on the lowest string, creating a bunch of haunting notes. When I got my confidence I rapidly smacked the strings with the bow and played chords rapidly. I slowed down, and went into the upper register, rapidly playing the highest string like a violin, trying to sound delicate. My mind wandered again, everything flooding my head. Me finally leaving Sam, everything he put me through, all the abuse and turmoil finally over. Which produced a dark sound with my guitar, throwing caution into the wind, and smack the shit out of it, occasionally strumming. It was a loud crescendo into chaos, but a beautiful one at that. 

Sweat soaked my skin and my heart was practically beating out of my chest. I kept looking over to Jake throughout the solo, searching for something but I didn't know what. I then saw the way he looked at me when I played, then I remembered the way he looked at me in general. The longing looks, his attention to detail to everything I did, the way he listened and cared. When I was looking at him I finally realized what I had been so painfully blind to. That a man only looked at someone that was for one reason, and the way I stared back only gave him more incentive to. Thing was is that I enjoyed it. I wanted his attention all the time, so bad it hurt. And I realized that since the moment I met him I had been falling for him. I just gave him the brightest smile and he reciprocated with exactly that.  

I walked to the front of the stage and went into another realm of playing. I created a brighter tone as my hand danced up and down the neck. I gave one final stroke with the bow and walked closer to the amp to create feedback, creating a loud screech, transitioning into the end of the song. I threw my bow into the crowd and took the pick from my mouth went back into the main riff of Dazed and Confused with the rest of the band.

 Asa took a mini drum solo at the end and absolutely nailed it. To finally finish it all off we all went crazy with our instruments, Matt just screamed into the mic, Eli just smacked his strings over and over, Asa lost it with the drums, and I went into a final wild solo. We all looked at each other and mentally counted down, ending the song together. The crowd erupted with cheers and we made our way off the stage, all of feeling exhausted and covered head to toe in sweat, but proud of our performance. 

The moment I got off stage I ran to Jake, and he quickly engulfed me in his arms, only staying there for a moment before he pulled away. He kept me at arms length minimum when he rained compliments onto me.

“Y/N that was absolutely fantastic! Oh my god that spin made us all lose our minds! You have to teach me. I didn’t know you could do all that, and that solo on Dazed and Confused? Phenomenal, I say something in you change.”

“Thank you so much! Speaking of that, Jake. I've got to talk to you.”

He didn’t seem to think too much about that last comment, he seemed rushed.

“Of course, love. Later alright? We go on right after you and Josh will actually kill me if I’m late.” 

“Yeah I totally understand. Go hurry, I can't wait to see you guys go on.”

He gave me a tight hug before speed walking to one of the dressing rooms.

Nerves grew within me when I realized I had two big conversations to have.

Speaking of which, I guess I should do damage control, coked out me is a bit impulsive.

***

Finding a quiet spot was weirdly hard, I mean we were in a literal desert. But I turned on my phone, not checking my notifications. I just went straight to my contacts and dialed Sams number.

He took longer to pick up then normal. Weird.

“ What’d you do this time?”

“Well hello to you too.”

“Well you only call me when you know you screwed up, like with Jimmy Page.”

I let out a long sigh, dread building in me. “Did you watch my show?”

He obviously has not.

“ I caught the end of it, You really only looked back stage, was jimmy page there.”

That anger was building up again, he didn't even mention the actual show.

“ Listen Sam about that-”

He cut me off  “Oh so you are fucking him?”

“Sam just shut the fuck up!” 

The line went quiet, and surprisingly stayed quiet.

“Sam I can't do this anymore.” My voice slightly shaking with every word.

“Y/N no, I-” His tone was different than any he’d used over this week. His words were panicked, I actually don't ever think I've heard him like this.

“No Sam, I don't want this anymore. You treat me like garbage, you don't trust me, and you don’t respect me. So this is done.”

He got louder, his tone even more panicked before. I think he might have been crying. 

“You don't have to do this! I'll stop, I-I’ll stop everything! I will do anything you want me to… Just please stay.”

“You know that's not what will happen.” I said slowly, I was practically hanging my head in shame.

“Y/N please.” 

“ Please move out before I get home, you have a week or so. Im sorry, Sam.” and with that I hang up. 

 I was practically whispered at that point. I wasn't disappointed in myself, but it was shitty of me to do it over the phone. The way I handled it all was shitty.

What pulled me out of mood was josh voice talking over the PA and Jake guitar ringing through the air. I booked it as fast as I could to the venue so I could see their whole show. I pushed respectively pushed through some random workers and crew, but I made to the wings just in time.

The moment got their parked myself as close I could, wanting to see everything. I caught Jake’s eyes when I got there and he almost seemed relieved. He gave me a warm smile, then refocused on the song “The Cold Wind.”

The show was absolutely phenomenal. They all killed it, Josh with his wailing, Sams bright bass lines, Jake perfect guitar work, and of course, Danny who held it all together perfectly. 

I danced and sang along with what I knew, Which was admittedly sparse. I didn't stop until I heard “Black Flag Exposition” which put me in a trance, I just couldn't focus on anything else. 

I know I heard it just yesterday but this is something else. His emotion bled through his music, he created magic that night. Which bled right into “Watching Over,”and he pulled the over the shoulder solo. It was uh… quite the spectacle.

 I danced and watched as long as I could, but before I could see the end of When the curtain falls I was dragged away by a roadie.

 I was given my guitar and attached to the bluetooth system. They worked fast, getting me through a small soundcheck as quickly as possible. After they just placed me right back where I was before to await my que. 

The moment I got there I heard Josh give a small speech to the crowd, and it was the sweetest thing I’d ever heard.

“I love you all! We are here to celebrate Life, love, and music. Where there is love, we must celebrate it, All of us! And Where there is no love we must provide it. That's what we are to do tonight. Now we have one last song, and one more person to spread the love with. Give it up for Miss Y/N Y/LN!”

With my guitar in hand I made my way to my spot on stage between Josh and Jake, the mic stand already set up. 

“We took a lot of time to think of the perfect song you guys, and we decided on the one song that can make anyone fall in love. Enjoy.”

Jake and I started the solo to “Annie's Song”  together, even though we didn’t have acoustics we still sounded beautiful. 

Josh came in, but instead of his normal higher pitched voice, he used his lower register which still blew me away even though we practiced for hours yesterday. With Sam on the Keys it all was enough to make me cry. 

When we got to the chorus Jake and I Stepped up to the mic to harmonize with Josh, but the crowd decided to join in. It was absolutely transcendent

. I couldn’t keep my eyes off of Jake, and the smile off of my face. Hearing the crowd sing along with us, singing with my friends, and finally feeling free, I couldn't help but let a tears flow down my cheeks.

We stepped back to let Josh sing again, and Jake seemed to notice the tears and gave me the sweetest smile he could. All the love in the room was truly moving me. For the last chorus josh asked the crowd to sing along again and as loud as they could. 

As Jake and I sang we stole glances from each other, the smiles not breaking from either of our faces. Something in me finally settled, I really was truly free. 

Josh sang the final note, and we finished off the song by giving a final strum to a G chord together. As quickly as it began it had ended and suddenly walking off stage, finding myself without a guitar and being wrapped into another from jake. 

I instantly could smell his cologne on him, stronger than anything else. My skin burned where he touched me, I was buzzing with adrenaline, and I wanted nothing more than to just stay there.

Without pulling away he whispered “That really was something, huh?”

“It really was, Jake.” I sniffled.

He gently pulled away, but didn't move me from his arms. Instead of saying anything he brought his hand to my cheek and gently wiped away my tears. I looked up to him with eyes full of emotion. A lopsided smile adorned his face, and I swore his eyes were full of stars.

His hand was warm on my face, and continued to gently stroke my cheek. 

“You're beautiful, you know that?” I blurted out, still with a soft tone. Our eyes never left each others. 

His smile grew at the comment and he seemed to drift closer to me, heat radiating off him. 

“ The same could easily be said for you, little Bird.” 

I reached up and brushed his hair out of his face, my fingers moving from the tucked hair behind his ear to the back of his neck, delicately entangling them in his hair. 

I glanced down to his mouth, his lips partially open, pink and plush, astonishingly beautiful. I met his eyes again, searching, trying to find an incentive to move forward. He looked at me with the same expression, something of desperation and a softness read through him.

I moved painfully slow, pulling him closer to me, the same scent from before coming back to me. I put my other hand on his bare chest, inching closer to him. He kept his hand on my face, but moved his other to my lower back. My whole body was buzzing, wanting to move closer.

My eyes fell to his face for a moment, he drifted closer to me, our noses bumped one another.

I held my breath in anticipation, waiting for the moment to come. 

I couldn't take it anymore. I closed my eyes and pushed forward,  my lips meeting his, my warmth pushing against his. I was slowly engulfed into the warmth of his body, fleeting touches, the both of us finally emotionally letting go. When he kissed back I felt my blood rushing through my body, my heart rate rapidly increasing,  I could feel his beat just as hard against my hand. He pulled me closer to him, and I ran my hand from his chest to his neck, desperately trying to feel as if we were one. 

Both of us were heavily breathing through our noses, not wanting to break away from the rhythm we had created. Our hearts beat in tandem, our hands creating a pace, and our lips moving together in tandem. Creating a New Tune, something in our spirits becoming one for a small, fleeting moment. 

We both pulled away, leaning our foreheads against each other, breath heavy, and our hands unmoving.

“I've been wanting to do that all week” He weakly laughed out.

#new tune #jake kiszka x reader #josh kiszka #sam kiszka #danny wagner #greta van fleet #finally some fluff #and my first kiss scene wow #i hope its not horribly embarassing #hes just so sweet im gonna die #one more chapter left #whoo boy #we gonna get a reblog lets find out #a fun mystery

[queenmaracasandlove]

Crazy Little Thing Called Love - Roger Taylor x F!Reader

Word Count: +/- 4600

Summary: Roger and reader have together for three years but they don’t seem to contemplate the future in the same way.

Warnings: Angst and tiny bit of fluff. Loads of cursing... sorry !

A/N: Imagined it as Ben!Roger (but with the right kind late 70s haircut please) but it can also be read as Roger x Reader. Tell me what you think loves !

MASTERLIST 

Permanent taglist: @reedusteinrambles

It was a lovely day of June in England’s capital and a perfect one for a lovely meal between friends. Soon Queen will be on the road again to promote their new album Jazz but they wanted to spend some time together with their families. Sometimes they were colleagues, often friends but most importantly they were always family. Roger Taylor the drummer had a beer in his hand as he was chatting with Freddie in the garden of his London’s home. His girlfriend of three years, Y/N was playing with Robert Deacon, John’s first child.

The little boy was very tired after all the laughter and play and ran into his mother’s arms to rest for a bit, quickly falling asleep. This melted Y/N’s heart, she could not believe how grown up he was. She remembered when he was just a tiny baby and now he had a little brother. It seemed so crazy, how fast things were going. When she had met the group none of them was married, Freddie was engaged to Mary and no kids were around. She smiled and went to sit on her boyfriend’s lap who placed a little kiss on her bare arm.

Y/N loved this kind of reunions. She missed Roger a lot when he was on tour but these kind of moments reminded her of how much she had. The most amazing partner of course but a lot more, a family. She was so thankful of how fast they had adopted her, making her feel part of their team. John and Veronica’s wedding had been one of her first “appearance” with Roger as his official girlfriend. She was so afraid not to belong there because at the time she was so afraid Roger would dump her overnight although she was already madly in love with him. But he hadn’t and she would never forget what Brian had told her that day “you must be very special to him because this is a big event and he would not have brought you here if he wasn’t serious”.

“Y/N my dear, you have your head in the clouds. What are you thinking about?” Freddie asked

“I was just thinking about how happy I am to have you all”

“Isn’t that sweet” Freddie said

“Roger surely is a lucky man” Brian added

Roger put his arms around Y/N’s waist while she bent back to kiss him. It was clear to everybody who was around them that they were soulmates, always bringing the best out of each other, radiating love and extremely passionate. The ups were very high and the down sometimes very cruel but it oddly worked.

“Y/N I think you killed Robbie, he’s sleeping like a dog on your couch” Veronica said, joining them

“Just enjoy the calm and take a seat” John added “It’s not like we have many peaceful moments these days”

“Cannot wait to know what it’s like” Brian said ironically

“As if it was going to be your problem” puffed Christine

Her hand was on her enormous belly, ready to give birth in two months. She wasn’t totally wrong. Soon the Queen family would have a new member but Brian would go back on the roads and miss much of the craziness. But they all knew what they signed up for when they started dating. Long distance relationship half of the year and then a few months sharing their partners with the recording studios. It was part of the deal and it was alright, most of the time. One of the reasons Y/N loved Roger so much was because of his passion for music, his determination. She would never think about him doing anything else.

“So” John started looking at Roger and Y/N “when are two joining the parents club”

“I already have a child you know” Y/N joked pointing at the drummer “Imagine a second Roger, that would be hell” Y/N laughed

“True” Brian agreed “You can have full custody whenever you want Y/N”

“Very funny May” said Roger “Seriously I don’t know why I should make the same stupid mistake that you all did. I want to keep my freedom, thank you very much”

Everybody laughed but after that sentence something happened to Y/N. She felt something weird in her lower stomach, like when something makes you very anxious and you can physically feel it. It was just to be funny, she knew it but still… She started to worry. What did he mean about keeping his freedom? They had been together for three years and even if they were still young she could clearly see the rest of her life of Roger’s side, and that included kids. It almost sounded as if he was not ready to commit but weren’t they already a more than serious couple?

Y/N tried to forget about it and went back to the discussion, her fingers playing with Roger’s hair. It had taken time to get used to their new length but she loved it. He was still the same but different a the same time. And it was almost frustrating to see how beautiful he was no matter what.

                                                  ---------------------

The afternoon had now come to an end and Roger and Y/N were both alone in their house. They had moved in together when the drummer had received his first real checks from his musical career and they were now sharing a nice house in London. Y/N was alone in it very often but it was their happy place. She was washing the dishes and Roger was wiping it, in silence, there had been so much noise all day.

“Today was great” Y/N said

“Yes it was. Thanks for that pie again. It was delicious” Roger replied, pecking her neck

She shivered at the touch and looked at him, smiling next to her. Y/N had tried to forget about it but she just could not. She wanted to talk about it but she was anxious, afraid of what Roger would say. She was fearful of sounding stupid, of him realizing she wasn’t as amazing as he said.

“Roger…” she started

“Yes doll?”

“Did you mean what you said earlier?”

“You’re going to need to be more precise than that because I said a lot of things today”

She handed him the last plate and turned around, placing her back against the counter and looked at him. He frowned, trying to remember what stupid thing he might have said that would have upset her, it wouldn’t have been the first time. But he really didn’t want to fight tonight. 

“When you said you didn’t want to have kids”

“Did I?” he asked, his jaw now tensed

“It was implied I guess but yeah…”

Roger put the dried plate on the other ones and moved to face Y/N, looking right at her. He was tired and he just wanted to cuddle with her. He was almost upset she would bring such a deep conversation right now.

“I don’t know. I just don’t see why I should think about it right now”

“What is that supposed to mean?” Y/N asked

“It means I’m not even 29 and I can’t see myself changing nappies okay?”

His tone was sharp and the atmosphere had totally changed in the kitchen. His word had hurt Y/N. He didn’t see why he should think about it? Maybe because she was right here. It made her feel as if she wasn’t part of his plans, as if he had never thought about a future for the two of them and that scared her. It had taken her months, a year to get rid of most of her insecurities but they were still here, deep down. She was always so afraid to lose him because he meant so much to her, but was it mutual?

She just left the kitchen, as if the conversation was over. Roger rolled his eyes, he knew that attitude and followed her. She would not calm down until she’d said what was really on her mind and he didn’t want it to take forever. She had a real talent for making things more complicated than they really  were. Always keeping things for herself instead of telling him right away. She was going upstairs, probably to their room. 

“What is it about this time Y/N?” he asked

She looked at him from the top of the stairs looking more afraid than angry though.

“Nothing. I just didn’t realise you were so attached to your freedom”

“As a matter of fact I am. I want to be able to come home to my beautiful girlfriend and enjoy the time I have with her for a bit you know”

She sighed and disappeared behind the bedroom door. Y/N loved to be Roger’s girlfriend, but this time it sounded wrong. Would she ever be more than that? His last sentence made her feel like she was just somebody he was happy to know would be here waiting for him when he would be back from tour. She started to undress and heard him coming inside the room. She knew this would end badly but she had to know.

“For fuck’s sake could we have a normal discussion Y/N? Or do we have to do a full tour of the house before you tell me what’s wrong?”

“I’m tired. I’m getting ready to go to bed”

“It’s not late”

“If I understand correctly the nice girlfriend waiting for you home is not allowed to be tired when her rockstar is home? My freedom is as important as yours Roger!”

Roger’s hands were on his head. What on earth was going on? How could she wrongly read into everything he said. This was not the night he had imagined for the two of them. All he had said was that he didn’t see himself having kids right now because he wanted to spent the free time he had with her but it was not what Y/N had interpreted, quite the opposite.

“Why could you not be happy that I just want to make love to you and spend time with you. I love the baby making process but once it’s there the rest is kind of ruined you know” he tried to joke

“Roger if you just want someone to fuck and spend time with, then just bring back one of the girls you shag  when you’re on tour”

He stopped breathing for a few seconds. She had never said it out loud. But she knew, she had always known of course. And that was probably not helping her tonight. She had suspected it first, but Paul Prenter had confirmed it by little insinuations, always making sure to be the most horrible person he could. And somehow she didn’t care. Because he fucked those girls and he made love to her. Because when he was home she was the only one that mattered. Because he always called, everyday on tour. But now, tonight, she felt more insecure than she had ever had. If he didn’t want kids with her then how did she mattered more than the other girls.

“Y/N I…”

“Save your breath. I don’t give a shit.” she started before facing him “You know what? In fact I do. I don’t care about what you’re doing on tour. But I do give a shit about us. But apparently you don’t and that’s what pisses me off okay?”

“Of course I care about us!”

“Then why didn’t you ask if fucking wanted kids!?”

He had answered her question but hadn’t returned it. He didn’t even care about what she wanted or  how she felt. If the only thing that mattered was him then she had been wrong on Roger and wasn’t sure she wanted to stay with someone like that. She would always value his independence but she also wanted someone who believe in building something hand in hand, with mutual respect and care for the other.

“Is this what it’s about? You want a fucking kid?”

He sounded so angry when he said it that Y/N started crying. He wasn’t angry at her, not completely at least. He was angry at himself. Because he felt so stupid for thinking she didn’t know about him cheating and because he didn’t want a kid, not right now. All he wanted was to be happy with her and he screwed up everytime. He loved, probably more than he loved himself. But he always found a way to make things turn bad.

“It’s about you seeing me as the happy fucking girlfriend waiting for her stupid boyfriend at home as if it was the only thing she wanted. But do you have any idea about how hard it is for me huh? How alone I am in this big house all the time?”

“Well at least be grateful you’re waiting in a fucking a big house that your stupid boyfriend paid for alright?

“Oh for fuck’s sake Roger piss off!” she screamed, and ran out of the room and down the stairs.

Roger looked over the handrail and saw her putting a coat over her nightdress.

“Where the fuck are you going?”

“Somewhere I am not reminded that I’m only a guest”

“But aren’t you happy with your life standard?” he said going down the stairs 

“I’m at the peak of my career Y/N. And I’m sorry I’m not around but I’m not going to stop.”

Her hand was on the door knob and she looked at him, furious. How could he say that? He knew she was aware of what his job was and she was proud of him.

“I would never ask you such a thing a you know it” she spitted, disappointed that he could thing she would

She opened the door and went out in the street, Roger following her.

“Do you know what it is like for them when they’re on tour and their wives are at home? When John missed Robert’s first steps, the first time he said a word and how he won’t be here for his first day of school? How Brian might miss the birth of his own fucking child? It’s not what I want”

“And what about what I want? What do you want from me Roger?” Y/N implored

He was sincere. Touring life was fun but it was crazy. His bandmates were missing home most of the time and everybody felt lonely. It was missing Y/N that made him do stupid things, that was the fear of not finding her at home when he would come back, it was the feeling of missing her, of emptiness. How would it feel it there was a kid at home? He would feel even worse, a bad father and he already felt like the worst boyfriend in the world, especially at that moment. But he was unable to say all those things, he had never been.

“I don’t know… I”

“Well think about it and tell me when you do. Because I don’t want to go be in a relationship where I’m just… I suppose I don’t know what I am to you anymore”

“Y/N stop being fucking overdramatic and come back inside”

She did not reply anything and just waved at a taxi. She wasn’t sure about what she was doing but she could just not stay there and see her hopes being crushed this way. She got in and he did not do anything to stop her, knowing it would have been useless. Roger just watched the taxi going away before going back inside.

Y/N couldn’t stop crying and the taxi driver was kind enough to make sure she hadn’t been hurt. But no, not really. She was devastated but it was her own fault, she had stopped being careful and now she was paying the price. She had allowed herself to believe Roger Taylor would want to be with her forever and now she felt so stupid.

The taxi stopped in front of Garden Lodge when she realised she didn’t have any money. But before she could say anything a silhouette was next to the window and handed money to the driver. Y/N got out of the car and immediately recognised Paul with his awful smirk on his face. She didn’t say anything and rushed inside the house. Freddie knew, Roger must have called if Paul was ready to pay for the taxi.

He opened his arms as soon as he saw her and she hugged him as tightly as she could. She felt bad for coming here. She didn’t want to bother Freddie because more than anything she knew he was Roger’s best friend before she was. But it was the first place she could have think of. She felt safe here and she knew Freddie would always welcome her.

“That’s alright dear” he said, patting her head

“Roger screwed up big time I see” Paul said, coming back inside

“Fuck off” Y/N grunted between two sobs

“Paul why don’t you call Roger and tell him Y/N has arrived and that I’ll take care of her for tonight?”

Freddie knew what both Roger and Y/N thought about Paul but didn’t really listen. Although she appreciated how he had reacted to his little remark. He took her to a guest bedroom and lay down with her on the bed, one of his cat coming to help comfort her. She cried a bit more in Freddie’s arms, letting it all go.

“So… What has my stupid drummer done this time?”

“He doesn’t love me Freddie… not really”

“What’s this nonsense about? He’s mad about you.”

“But… He doesn’t see anything more in me than just… a girlfriend and… I think I wanted more than that…”

“Y/N I’m going to start thinking you’re as stupid as him”

Y/N looked at her friend, confused. He wasn’t the type of man who would beat about the bush but she was quite surprised.

“I’m going to tell you a little bedtime story alright?”

She nodded, not knowing where he was going but curious. He frowned until she got under the cover and then smiled which made her smile to, petting the little cat who was now on her belly.

“Once upon a time was a little blond guy who was looking a lot like a girl, and a hot one. He was extremely annoying but a very intelligent and kind person.” he started “Just so you know it’s about Roger” he added, making Y/N laugh a little “So, this little Roger boy was quite successful with ladies you know and he liked it. The thing was they would never stay. At first it was because he was a little shit, then it was because they just wanted to sleep with him and later because nobody could keep up with his lifestyle. Until one day this girl came around. She was funny, gorgeous and super smart. Apart from when it came to her own love life and in case you hadn’t get it I’m talking about you here. So! Roger boy had been in love a few times, or so he thought. He would always go too fast and do stupid things. But that girl was different and he was very careful with her. And at that time he was very insecure about himself and what he had to offer so I think he never dared to plan too far.”

Y/N didn’t know what to say. Was it true? Was Roger really insecure about the possibility of him being loved? Did he really think that she was going to leave him on day?

“Alright” Freddie shouted clapping in his hands “End of the story for now but I’m sure it will end with happily ever after, now sweet dreams love.”

                                                  --------------------

Y/N woke up with heavy eyes. She had eventually fallen asleep after hours of thinking. She could not believe Freddie and she felt so bad. Still angry but so confused. All she wanted was to speak to Roger, to know what was really going on. She left the bedroom and went to the living room where she found her other-half, his hair completely messed up and his eyes clearly testifying for a sleepless night. He was drinking coffee with Freddie and Paul was in a corner, knowing not to come too close to Roger. 

“Y/N dear, please come and join us”

Roger got up immediately and looked at her, his eyes begging her not to run away. But she couldn’t have even if she had wanted to, her legs could not move. There was an awkward silence and the tension was palpable.

“Are any of you going to say something or?” Paul asked

Both Roger and Y/N looked at him as if they wanted to kill him.

“Shut up!” they both shouted at the same time

“I think they probably need some privacy. Let’s go” Freddie simply added

Roger thanked him with a nod and waited until he was alone with Y/N who was looking at her feet. He found her so beautiful in her nightdress, so vulnerable and yet so strong.

“Y/N” he started and she looked right into his eyes again “I don’t want to have kids…”

“Are you joking ?” she cut him

“For now! Please let me talk. Some of what I said yesterday was true. I don’t want to have kids right now. I do think I’m still young, I do think Queen is going strong and I don’t want to be partly involved in it. This is what I’ve always wanted Y/N.”

“I’m fucking happy for you then…”

“Fucking stop it Y/N!”

And here they were again, fighting as if they were unable to just simply talk to each other. They always flew of the handle so easily.

“This is what I wanted, but you’re what I never dared to dream of” Roger almost screamed

“But you don’t care about I want”

“I do ! I was just an idiot okay? And I’m sorry about it. I thought I was giving you what you wanted, I though all you wanted was me and…”

“Don’t you even dare say your money you bastard because I will kill you”

“Of course not ! I know that Y/N.”

He knew, of course he knew she loved him for who he was.

“I’m not John or Brian, I’m not as good as they are with these kind of things. i’m stupid and I make bad choices. I can’t stand being away from you. I don’t know how to do it”

“I don’t care about John and Brian, I love you Roger !”

“I just thought that sooner I wouldn’t be enough anymore”

“Roger...”

Her tone was much different this time. Y/N almost ran to him, she could not stand seeing him like that. She took his face between her hands, wiping his tears with her thumbs. 

“I never really thought about it before because I never thought someone would be crazy enough to want to have kids with me…”

Y/N gasped, Freddie might have been right but she just couldn’t believe it.

“I’m so sorry for behaving the way I did Y/N. But you mean so much to me and I just wanted to be happy with what I had. I was so afraid you would realise I wasn’t worth it one day and disappear and…”

This time she stopped him talking by kissing him. She needed to. She needed to tell him how stupid he was, how much she loved him and words could not be enough. She captured his lips, their tears colliding on both their faces.

“Roger. Don’t you ever think you’re not good enough? You could have anyone in the world but you chose me, and I chose you. You’re talented, you’re so smart, you care about the world and you care about people. I don’t want to have kids tomorrow but maybe one day because I know you would be an amazing father and.... I don’t care if you’re miles away for months, I never did. Because I love you Roger. I love you more than anything. And I’m never gonna leave you, not until you want me too. As long as I’m the one you love, as long as I’m the one who’s in your heart, as long as you call when you’re away and as long as you see … Roger can you see the future with me?”

Roger smiled which surprised Y/N and then he parted, getting down on one knee. She screamed a little, unable to believe what was going on.

“Y/N I could have done this after our second date because that was the moment I knew you would be the one. But I never wanted to push you not to scare you away but apparently that was a stupid thing to do. Anyway. I never thought I would be ready. But you can never be ready for love. It’s a crazy thing right? I love you Y/N. And I don’t want to see my future with anyone but you. You know me, you make me happy, you inspire me. You’re the reason I don’t go too crazy. You’re the only person crazy enough to want to have kids with me. And right now I don’t believe I would ever be a good dad but you know what? I’m also sure you’ll be able to convince me otherwise.  I promise to always try to be better and to listen to you even when you don’t speak. I promise to make more effort and to show you how much I care.”

“Yes… yes of course”

He was back up and kissing her. They were both so relieved, so happy. He put the ring on her wedding finger, it was wonderful, exactly what she liked and it meant so much. Her legs were now around his hips, she felt so stupid and so wonderful at the same time. Her hands were pressed on his face, she never wanted to let go of him but she suddenly had to. They heard some throat clearing before Freddie entered the room, clapping his hands.

“Well I thought kids were not for today so please to start making babies in my living room my loves” he joked

Both Roger and Y/N laughed, too numbed by love to be embarrassed. He came closer to Y/N and took her hand to see the ring, before making a funny face.

“So I guess I’m gonna be best man right?” he said

“Of course” Roger said

“Perfect ! Now go back to your place and do what you have to while I’m planning a magnificent engagement party for my two favourite stupid people”

Roger and Y/N looked at each other and thanked Freddie for being such a good friend before leaving. All they could think about was spending all the time they had left together, telling each other much they were in love, in all the possible ways. And as of now, they both knew they had the rest of their lives to do so.

#queenmaracasandlove #queen #queen imagines #bohemian rhapsody #bohrhap #borhap #roger taylor #ben hardy #ben!roger x reader #ben!roger imagine

[lilacs-with-lavender]

❧ Green with Envy ☙

Newt Scamander x fem!reader

Prompt: No matter what you do Newt just won’t notice you, so it’s time to resort to desperate measures...

Warning: swearing,angst, & eventual intense & unprotected sex

WC: 4,109

Reader’s POV

You looked around the dinner table dejectedly, watching as your not so secret crush laughed and chatted with the lovely Tina Goldstein. Oh how cruel the world was you thought watching as Newt struggled to look anywhere but your intense gaze, his cheeks becoming red & his attention to Tina’s lovely story slipping away. You knew he held some affection for you, Queenie had said as much over a bottle of fire whisky not too long ago. And yet you couldn’t seem to catch his eye, besides mumbling and blushing he would just stand there awkwardly whenever you attempted any sort of flirtation. Huffing and turning your gaze elsewhere your thoughts took a dark turn, it was like he was physically unable to make the first move and it was driving you insane. Maybe he just needed a little push you thought deviously twirling your H/C locks round your fingers tightly, the beginning of a plan forming in your head. Queenie, catching wind of your mischievous thoughts raised a strawberry blonde eyebrow at your sudden smirk from across the table. You met her gaze head on and directed your thoughts to her,

‘I’m going to need your help Queen.’

She couldn’t help but smile at your affectionate nickname and laughing she subtly nodded in your direction.

~*~

Everything was ready and in place except you, panicked you had showered too late and your dress was wrinkled, not to mention your smokey eye looked more like a black eye, and you looked like you were taking the walk of shame to another level. Queenie rushed in five minutes before everyone had to leave to get to the bar... but as soon as she walked in she both saw and heard your dilemma. Closing the door firmly and walking towards you she raised her wand determinedly and you watched in awe as everything righted itself. Your tight green dress sparkled and ironed itself out into a gorgeous thigh length mini dress with a plunging neckline, your smokey eye was transformed, now alluring and mysterious with a subtle nude lip to compliment it. What she did to your hair you could only guess but it fell past your shoulder blades in long loose H/C waves. You let out an audible gasp as you stared at the almost finished product and looking to Queenie in glee you gave her an enthusiastic hug. Pulling away from you and holding her wand in the air she blew a piece of strawberry blonde hair from her face and held up a pair of emerald green stilettos to match and in that moment you swear you could’ve kissed her. As you admired yourself in the silver full length mirror by your bed Queenie wrapped her arms around your neck from behind adding a simple silver necklace and dangling earrings. Beaming she whispered, hands on your shoulders,

“Go get him Y/N”

~*~

Just then there was impatient knocking at the door followed by a just as impatient voice,

“Y/N, Queenie, you guys done in there?!”

“Just coming Teenie!”

Queenie yelled back as you nervously chewed on your lip forgetting the nude lipstick,

“Y/N honey come on what ya doing, it’ll be fine, you're unstoppable tonight!”

Nodding and reapplying your lipstick the both of you walked hand in hand to the door. Queenie smiled sneakily just as you twisted the door knob,

“Flipping Fwoopers I forgot my purse!”

And as the door swung open you laughed hard.

~*~

Newt’s POV

Newt stood uncomfortably in the hallway outside your room with a dapper looking Jacob and an extremely impatient Tina. Fiddling with his bow tie nervously he tried not to think about tonight and how nervous he was… because you would be there.. and you always made him nervous… and what if you didn't like him and and oh god he was thinking about tonight. He just didn’t understand, shoving his hands in the pockets of his grey slacks he attempted to look casual and relaxed as he heard the door knob to your room twist. Surely he wouldn’t have to talk to you tonight maybe you couldn’t tell that he had a slight affection for you… but then the door opened and Newt’s jaw hit the floor. You were gorgeous, laughing and smiling at something Queenie had said, exuding the most attractive confidence he’d ever seen in you and tossing back your lovely head of hair. Not to mention your dress, which clung to your gorgeous form tightly. Speaking of that dress … Merlin’s beard Newt practically drooled as his dark eyes slid down your body, trying to memorize the way the sheer emerald fabric hugged your chest, his eyes wandering lower and lower until, your lovely visage turned to meet his. Framed by H/C locks you gazed at him flushing instantly but for once Newt met your glowing E/C eyes and reddened cheeks boldly, his pants growing tighter as he fell in love on the spot.

~*~

Reader’s POV

You tried to take deep calming breaths before you went into the hall were everyone was waiting, hell where Newt was waiting! Your anxiety was about to consume you when you heard Queenie gasp a saying that she knew made you laugh raucously,

“Flipping Fwoopers I forgot my purse!”

Blinking, your hand already on the door knob you snorted and burst out laughing. Queenie had a small knowing smile on her lips as she pushed the door open for you. Still laughing you tossed back your perfectly done hair and realized too late the hallway was dead quiet except for your outrageously loud laugh. Looking to Queenie for help she saw she was smiling wildly and had a far off look that confirmed your suspicions, she was reading someone’s mind… whose thoughts were making Queenie so happy? You searched for Jacob but he was nibbling on a pastry innocently… no… Queenie was looking at someone behind you. Turning, the world seemed to slow down around you, a familiar freckled face was wearing a not so familiar expression. Newts seafoam green eyes were darker, so dark you could drown in that green ocean, but those eyes weren’t looking at you they were undressing you. A sharp tingling flew down your spine and pooled in between your legs as the tall man raked his eyes over your form, shivering and pressing your legs together desperately you met his heated gaze. There was a storm in those gorgeous eyes you thought you knew well, he met your gaze boldly, no blushing or mumbling this time. There was something darker something that almost made you whimper out loud at the thought of this man kissing you, touching you, finally blushing you were the first to look away. Knowing if you looked even a second longer you may never look away.

“Let’s go people the clubs always packed by 10:00.”

Tina’s brisk voice brought you spinning back to reality and gripping your clutch purse in hopes of calming your tingling body and your heaving breaths. You glanced at Newt fervently but the passion filled man you had just met was gone and you're adorable animal loving friend was back, shuffling obediently up to Tina and running a hand through his curly cinnamon hair. Your mind still reeling you linked arms with Tina and Queenie and braced yourself.

~*~

The smell of cigars and the sound of drunken laughter hit the five of you like a wall as you walked into The Blind Pig. Merlin’s beard you needed a drink, heading straight for the bar you ordered four shots of giggle water and glanced around the bar looking for a particular curly ginger head. Spotting Newt cozied up in a booth next to Tina with Jacob and Queenie you scowled and reached for your first shot, this was impossible. What was the point of investing all your affections in one man if he showed zero interest in you, with each shot the memory of the passionate man in the hallway and Queenies wide smile became a distant reality. Soon you had a dazed smile on your face and a flutter in your stomach, trying to remember why you had been staring at a spot above newts shoulder for the last five minutes you called the bartender over. However before you could order another round of giggle water a husky voice beat you to it,

“A round of shots for me and the tall drink of water if ya please.”

Smiling suggestively at you the tall dark stranger leaned against the polished bar waiting for your reply. A painful memory of a sunlit, freckled, and smiling face flashed in your minds eye, the first time Newt had showed you the bowtruckle tree in his case, you winced at the memory, it was the first time you had admitted to yourself that you loved him. But that freckled smiling face was currently having an amazing time with Tina, you realized sourly, so resolutely you turned to the well dressed man, your expression impressively seductive.

“What’s a good looking guy like you doing in a dive like this?”

~*~

Newt’s POV

Newt squinted, attempting to make out your shimmering form through the hazy smoke and dim yellow lighting of the jazz club. It was a difficult task but as he craned his neck and attempted to get up from the booth a pair of small firm hands pulled him down.

“Let her be Newt your always chasing after Y/N, you never stay and talk with me, she’s a grown woman you know she can take care of herself!”

Newt furrowed his brow and looked at Tina with distaste it was unlike her to be so jealous, he scowled but said gently,

“So are you Tina.”

She looked up at him taken aback and affronted as he turned away heading towards the bar. Newt stood straightening out his collar and smoothing his slacks, he felt like no matter what he wore he was disparagingly drab next to your beauty. Feeling his confidence rise, Newt thought he might even buy you a drink, he would try hard not to get red and flustered and he’d be the perfect gentleman he decided happily. As soon as he saw your shining H/C tresses his happiness peaked only to come crashing down around him when he saw who was next to you. A tall handsome man that exuded confidence stood much too close to you and attempted to snake an arm around your waist, eyes drifting down to your low cut neckline. Newt watched it all in slow motion; the drunken giggle escaping your pouty lips and the mans lingering gaze on your body as he leaned in close to you, so close Newt saw your eyes crinkle and your mouth turning into a disapproving frown. That was all it took for his already thin patience to snap.

~*~

Reader’s POV

You had gotten through three more shots and the world seemed to be slightly fuzzy at the edges like everything happening was apart of a dizzy dream, as of right now you decided that it was a nightmare. The giggle water had gone straight to your head but currently you were getting less drunk and more annoyed at the man you had been chatting up, or ‘Josh’ as he had said not even asking for your name first. Josh was getting too close to your hips for your liking and you were in no mood for a one night stand, just when you were ready to excuse yourself for ‘some air’ you caught the smell of freshly churned soil and cinnamon. “Leave her alone.”

Your eyebrows shot skyward and you turned around, but the person you associated with that smell was nowhere to be found, instead the man from the hallway was back. The tall magizoologist was dangerously quite and his eyes were that dark ocean of green once more. You shivered and backed away, unintentionally into the arms of the one Newt was trying to protect you from. Josh smirked and you whipped around standing apart from them both quickly.

“She’s with me,”

Newt said with a confidence unlike any you’d ever heard from him. Josh laughed,

“She doesn’t look like she’s with you and if she’s fair game then I’d like to go back to my place now.”

He wiggled his eyebrows at you suggestively, you opened your mouth to put him in his place but Newt beat you to it.

“No I don’t think so.”

Josh took a swig from his whiskey glass and whipped out his wand staggering towards Newt with a deranged glint in his eye. You panicked,

“This has gone far enough!”

You pulled your wand from your clutch and grabbed Newt apparating on the spot to the first place you could think of, your apartment. You turned, furious at Newt but not meeting his gaze you placed your clutch on the table and slipped off your heels,

“What were you thinking?! Your not my big brother I’m a grown woman, I can take care of myself!”

You took a breath to continue your admonishing and spun towards the door to lock it. You nearly ran into a toned chest. Stopping short and swallowing your lecture you looked up hesitantly not knowing which Newt would meet your eyes. A vast sea of dark blue-green met your glittering E/C eyes, the man from the hallway and the bar looked down at you. Blushing you stuttered,

“Listen, I.. you shouldn’t ..you can’t just...”

Exasperated, you tried desperately to form a sentence but then you stopped trying, because Newt placed his hand on your cheek. You stared into the raging typhoon that was his eyes and swallowed a whimper, Merlin’s Beard this man.

“Y/N you don’t understand what… you couldn’t possibly… it’s not..”

He paused frustrated as you had been and said with an air of finality,

“You’ll always be the only one for me.”

Your hand came up to your mouth, the looks, the touches, the laughs all of it was real… and he was real.

“Your my everything.”

You breathed it softly, this admission of your passion and your breath hitched as you watched what you said take effect. It started in his eyes, now you understood what the darkness in them was… pressing your legs together you realized it was lust. Newt looked as if he had been waiting for your permission and he looked to be in physical pain, restraining every muscle in his body from ravishing you. Knowing he needed an extra push you put both hands on his shoulders and nuzzled your face in his neck,

“Show me I’m the only one.”

And with your hot breath tickling his neck and your soft hands at his shoulders, Newt snapped.

~*~

Newt’s POV

Merlin’s beard you were fantastic, Newt had grabbed you by the waist and shoved you into the nearest wall, and as he latched onto your neck you moaned his name. It was the hottest thing Newton Scamander had ever fucking heard. His knee was in between your legs now and you were kissing him like there was no tomorrow. He could feel the heat radiating from your core, and you were driving him wild, his senses overloaded by everything that was so perfectly you. Your perfume, your shampoo, it all combined to make a scent that was so alluring Newt thought he would drown in it and die a happy man. But as your hands drifted to his belt memories of the man at the bar arose and he growled at the thought of that stranger here with you instead of him. Newts eyes blazed with a glittering passion and pressing a possessive kiss to the dip of your low neckline he ripped your dress down the middle. You gasped as the cold air hit your exposed nipples and put a hand on Newts chest to push him back,

“Newt Scamander that was my favorite dress!”

But Newt was hiding behind his hair again and all he could do was drink in your nearly naked figure,

“You look fucking delicious Y/N.”

The anger on your face turned to arousal quickly, Newt did not swear often and he smirked as he saw how much it turned you on. There you stood one hand on his chest and one clutching at the wall you were up against, the emerald remains of your dress lay torn at your feet and all that was between your legs was a scrap of lacy black fabric that couldn’t possibly qualify as underwear. Licking his lips and pushing your hand away lazily Newt directed his full attention to the lovely round breasts in front of him,

“No bra Y/N why, you must have been the biggest slut in the bar today…”

Newts voice was low and gravelly and he smirked when he heard your mewl of delight at his words.

“Newt..”

~*~

Reader’s POV

You were squirming against the wall with your eyes screwed shut, when you peeked he was still standing there just staring at all of you with those lusty eyes, whimpering you felt the heat pool between your legs more and more but he just stood there looking ridiculously gorgeous!

“ah..Newt..please..”

He rolled up his sleeves and you nearly moaned out loud, his freckled forearms were tan and scarred and god you so desperately wanted them on you. He stared at you intently licking his lips again god damn him and said in a voice that sent your body into overdrive,

“Tell me what you want Y/N.”

Shuddering you looked up at him with hooded eyes and whispered,

“Want.. you, touch me Newt… oh gods touch me!”

That was all you had to do it turns out, he rushed to you and gathered you in his arms carrying you into a familiar room, your bedroom you realized. He laid you gently on the bed below him but turned you over before you could get comfortable. You heard a clink of metal and frowned,

“Newt? What’s going on?”

Silence... then a sharp ‘thwap’ as leather hit your bare ass, it stung but the vibration through your panties had you mewling.

“You need to be punished Y/N, you said and did some things that hurt me today,”

‘thwap’ you moaned out loud,

“I’d like an apology.”

‘thwap’

“Merlin! I’m sorry!”

‘thwap’ you screamed,

“I’m sorry!”

The belt stopped and you felt soft warm lips in its place kissing the red marks lovingly. You twisted, turning onto your back and scowling,

“You are very overdressed Mr. Scamander.”

Smirking you watched Newt shudder at the title while you noticed the sizeable tent in his pants eagerly.

As soon as he pulled his dress shirt off however you could not contain yourself, your hands ran down his scarred chest eagerly. Newt however looked at you nervously from behind his hair,

“I know.. t-t-there not the nicest things to look at…”

You kissed each silver scar passionately and paused to look up at him,

“I think their beautiful.”

He smiled regaining his confidence and gently pushing you back down but you noticed while you had been distracted, the handsome redhead had undressed and was left in navy blue boxers that you were tempted to rip off. But before you could do so a warm and wet sensation started trailing up your thigh.

“oh...my..Newt what are you doING!”

The wizards mouth was on your core and he had shoved your parties to the side sliding his tongue inside you eagerly lapping at your juices while you writhed and moaned one hand anchoring you in the sheets and the other tugging at the head of cinnamon hair between your legs. Suddenly without warning newt replaced his tongue with two fingers, plunging them deep into your core. You were chanting his name like a prayer now as his mouth latched onto one of your bouncing nipples, increasing your pleasure tenfold.

“Newt...I-I-I’m so… Aghh!”

He had added a third, vigorously sliding the slick digits in and out of your cunt, his long fingers were pushing you over the edge.

“I-I-I’m I’m gonna..”

He stopped, the idiot stopped! You looked down at him betrayed but he just smiled that annoying melt your heart smile and said albeit darkly,

“Save it dear, we still haven’t reached the main event..”

His face was inches from yours now and boy were you a mess of denied pleasure and intense arousal. He leaned forward and kissed you passionately and you moaned into the kiss eagerly tasting yourself, your hands wrapping around his neck. His hands were busy sliding down his boxers and your panties however and once they did you gasped into his mouth, pulling away you muttered fervently into his ear,

“Wow who knew you were packing Scamander?”

And by that you meant packing, he was huge, his length slapping against his stomach eagerly. Newt, for all his confidence tonight was frozen above you blushing but you smiled reassuringly and said gently,

“Go ahead sweetheart I’ve wanted this for a long time.”

Nodding Newt, in contrast to his earlier movements slid slowly into you, while you moaned all the while. His cock stretched and filled you like nothing you had ever experienced, and as you stared at the concentrated freckly face above you, you whispered as seductively as you dared,

“Don’t hold back Mr. Scamander…”

You grunted, surprised as his cock moved within you, moaning lewdly as it pulled back out and Newt snapped his hips. You groaned digging your nails into his back, earning a growl from the almost primal man above you as he sped up his thrusts. With an arm on either side of your head Newt found a new angle and dynamite sticks of pleasure were exploding in your core so you let him know,

“Oh..yes.. Merlin...Newt right THERE!”

He was drilling you into the mattress now sucking and biting at your chest aggressively as you held on for dear life. You were close and he knew it, angling his thick cock even deeper inside of you as you screamed his name wildly. His mouth leaving your now abused breasts, he brought a hand to your clit and started rubbing,

“You think anyone in that bar could’ve made you feel this good? Huh Y/N?”

You bit your lip and shut your eyes shaking your head no,

“What was that darling?”

“N-n-n-no!”

You got out, voice faltering every time he thrust into your heat. His ocean eyes were a glittering green storm above you now as you writhed and screamed yourself hoarse. He was getting close too and you could feel his cock twitching inside of you, “Who do you belong to Y/N?”

You barely processed his words your mind a mess of pleasure,“Y-y-y-you…”

“What was that love?”

You were both so close, hot bodies grabbing at one another desperately,

“You I belong to you Newt!”

Newt groaned at the sound of his name on your lips and thrust into you hard one last time spilling his seed deep within you. His hot seed within you was enough to trigger your release and as your pussy convulsed around him white fireworks exploded in front of your eyes, you heard someone screaming in pleasure and realized it was you. Your eyes were locked onto Newts the hold time and he held you tightly as your orgasm washed over you. Finally as your head began to clear and you came down from your dizzying high, you gazed at the man holding you. He was flushed from your recent lovemaking and his curls more tousled then usual, you were star struck, his eyes were there normal lovely shade of green-blue and you nearly fainted when you realized he was already staring at you the same way. Merlin’s Beard you were both so in love.

“Y/N?”

“Yes dear?”

“I’m sorry if I hurt you I pride myself on my control but when I’m around you I just...I can’t… i-i-it’s hard to explain..”

He looked up at you through the mass of messy ginger curls almost apologetically, but you giggled.

“Newt if my sore throat is any indication I’m pretty sure I fucking loved it.”

He smiled and soft Newt, your creature loving best friend was back, and as much fun as envious Newt was, you decided as you felt two freckled arms wrap around your waist and warm breath nuzzle into your neck, that you liked this Newt better.

*****************************************************************************************************

AWWWWWWWWW we love a fluffy ending...I’m lowkey really proud of this it took me a week to write! Please reblog if you enjoyed! 

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 @tehgvicious @carryoncaptainrogers @veganfangirl5

#newt scamander #newt fic #original writing #newt scamander is a cinnamon roll #eddie redmayne #fantastic beasts and where to find them #fantastic beasts the crimes of grindelwald #newt imagine #newt fanfiction #newt scamander smut #newt x reader fic #newt x reader smut #newt x you #newt x reader #newtina #jacob x queenie #newt x tina #newt x y/n

[ncttaghcstt]

✏️ jazz x danny (non romantic cause yikes Jskdjd)

SEND ME “✏️ + a ship“ or “headcanon + a ship” for three ( or more ) random headcanons I have for that ship! @imgoingghcst

Even at the age of two and a half, the moment she laid her steel blue eyes on her newborn baby brother, Jazz knew that her life was going to revolve around Danny and she did not dislike that thought one bit. She was going to be the best older sister she can be for him and if that meant she’s going to need to be there for him for whatever, then she will.

A young Danny coming home with cuts and bruises was a sight that Jazz forever hated seeing, but she was always the one who would lead him into the bathroom or to one of their bedrooms, take out the first aid kit and begin tending to his wounds without their parents knowing. Jazz didn’t like not telling their parents about Danny’s bulling, but she always thought that they would make things worst for him if they were to intervene, which is why she always tried to take matters within her own hands instead.

This is my baby brother. I don’t care if he’s a grown adult now who can deal with his own problems, if you break his heart, Jazz will want to break your face because Danny does not deserve anymore grief and she will be damned if she allows anyone else hinder his mental progress because of it. Danny deserves to be happy and if you cannot see how great her baby brother is than you do not deserve to be around him at all.

Speaking of which, there was one date she had in where Jazz couldn’t contain herself and she ended up actually punching a guy on the face and even breaking his nose during the process because of the fact that he called her sickeningly obsessed with her unstable little brother. It wasn’t even being referred to as obsessed that caused her to do that, but the way it was said and because clearly his mind was thinking of something else and Jazz had to prove to him that just because she is protective of Danny, does not mean they had that kind of relationship. He also spoke about Danny in ways she wasn’t going to accept to hear and was glad that he hadn’t been there to listen to all that.

She uses the excuse of how Danny needed her here at Corona as to why she had decided to move with him. But the actuality of it all is that while he may still needed her, Jazz needed Danny too and couldn’t fathom being miles away from him. Literally, her own mental health could not stand in the thought of being unaware of what happens to him in where she isn’t close enough to help, and so for the sake of his own sanity and her own, Jazz needed to move with him to Corona even if he didn’t want her to. Which thankfully, he wasn’t against it. 

While staying in good health is something Jazz generally enjoys doing since it’s not only good for the body but for the mind too, another reason to why she tries to be at peak health is because she doesn’t like getting sick. Being sick means that she has to focus on herself and can’t put much attention to what Danny is doing or if something happens to him, but there was a point back when they were still teenagers in where Jazz got so sick she had to stay home for an entire week. She thought it was going to be the worst week of her life, but what surprised her about that time was Danny coming home school, ignoring her questions on how his day was and instead, began taking care of her himself. He brought her soup and tea, placed a cool towel against her forehead to try and get her fever down and even kept their one hour sibling time when he could have used the excuse of her being sick to to do so. 

Jazz may be smart but she will once in a while come up with dumb ideas. For instance, not long after she discovered Danny’s powers and learned how they were ghost like, she did dive into the internet and checked out a few books on ghost to see if there was anything she needed to know about….just in case. And one thing Jazz discovered was that apparently surrounding the intended being with the ghost like abilities (because she refuses to think that her little brother was an actual ghost) within a ring of salt would prevent them from going anywhere. Their parents had mentioned that once too, and deeming this as factual, it would not come as a shock if Jazz ever tries this tactic one day after Danny finally tells her about his powers. If only to double check if it was true, or unless she had a reason in preventing Danny from leaving.

Every morning when she wakes up, Jazz makes sure there is a cup of coffee already warmed up and made for her little brother and if he doesn’t get up in time before she has to leave for work, Jazz will then leave a small note with some philosophical and encouraging quote on it for him to read next to his coffee. She does this as a way to try and brighten up his mornings while hoping he has a good start in whatever is to come for the day.

Has a scrapbook filled with all of Danny’s accomplishments and things that she knew for a fact that had made him feel happy about, even for the smallest of things, and likes to show it to him during the times he feels the most down. Sometimes it works. But other times it doesn’t.

Jazz likes to keep tabs in all of Danny’s friends and potential romantic interests because again, she wants to make sure that these people will be good for him. No, she doesn’t prevent him from being around any of his friends even if she doesn’t think they would be good for him, but she will disclosed her concerns about them to Danny if she has to. 

Once every month, they have a day in where they both pick a trashy movie or show to watch and just spend the entire time making snide and sassy comments about how awful it is. It’s a perfect way to get some laughs, even to the point in where one of the two would be throwing kernels of popcorn towards the tv when something especially stupid happens. Don’t worry, Jazz cleans up afterwards, but she never minds the mess as long as she is having a nice time with Danny (and his friends depending on whether Sam and Tucker wants to take part in this). But it’s usually exclusively between the two.

#( you just can't accept that i'm apart of your ghost~fighting team; can you?: asks ) #( answered ) #( c: danny f ) #( i was hoping someone would go over every excruciating detail of my personal diaries to look for minuscule errors: headcanons )