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azrielslightintheshadows · 5 months

Note

Hello. If you don't mind can I request a fic with cassian with a shy reader where she and Cassian have been trying to get pregnant for years, but reader starts doubting herself when seeing the rest of the inner circle females like feyre and elain getting pregnant, and thinking cassian will leave her because it is taking them ages to get pregnant...but Cassian reassures her and all...and weeks later reader finds out she is pregnant and surprises cassian with the news...

Finally.

Cassian x f!Reader

Masterlist.

Warnings; mentions of infertility

My heart literally melted when I finished this.

The sun was shining bright above Velaris and everyone was outside enjoying the warmth. You were watching from the window in one of the guest rooms in the river house. Feyre was sprawled on the lounger her hand on her round belly laughing at Nyx who was being thrown around by your mate -Cassian. Elain was sitting next to her on Lucien’s lap, her hand resting above Lucien’s on her small baby bump. You were so devastated by the sight that you felt like you would faint. You and Cassian had been trying for a baby for 11 years now and every time Madja shook her head with a sad smile you lost a bit of hope. You couldn’t understand why you couldn’t get pregnant, was it you? Were you the problem?

You watched Cassian with Nyx, he was so good to him and you didn’t miss the longing look on his face. Your mate was broken and you couldn’t stand it so you turned your back on the window and let the tears flow. He had every right to leave you and find someone else, someone who could bear his children. You wouldn’t stand in the way of his happiness, if he decided to leave you… you would gather your stuff and go. The thought had you sobbing and you knelt in front of the bed, pressing your face on the soft mattress.

Your body was shaking and you didn’t notice that you were sending everything down the bond.

Strong arms engulfed you and Cassian’s panicked voice rang in your ears.

“What happened baby? What’s wrong?”

You leaned back onto him and cried harder

“Please don’t leave me…please I will try harder to get pregnant I will search for some herbs that might help… I will take everything…maybe I can find a witch…I will even give her my soul…just please Cass don’t leave me”

Cassian’s heart broke, he held you tightly and kissed your head.

“What are you talking about? Are you serious?

I would never leave you… I don’t care if we never have a child… we can go and take one of the kids whose parents died in the war I don’t care… I only want you… pregnant or not.” His voice was loud enough to make his point. “Please doll calm down. It’s me and you we’re talking about… our love is stronger than the cauldron itself.”

You stopped sobbing and peeked at him.

“But I want to make you a daddy” you whined.

“As I said before we can take one of those unfortunate kids… or you can call me daddy” he winked and you gasped, your face becoming red.

After you calmed down Cassian took your hand and guided you outside, you both sat on the ground and played with Nyx.

That night Cassian made love to you. It was so needy and filled with so much love and affection that you wished it never ended.

The next days were peaceful and you didn’t think about pregnancy at all. You had to thank your mate about that since he put all his duties on hold to spend time with you, you knew he was trying to get your mind off the subject and it only made you love him harder.

One month later.

You woke up feeling nauseous and you almost didn’t make it to the bathroom. You heaved over the toilet bowl, and watched as the contents of your stomach came out and heaved harder. Cassian was by your side, holding your hair back and rubbing your shoulders.

“Go away I don’t want you to see me like this” you whimpered.

“Shh it’s okay” he whispered and leaned down to leave a kiss on the back of your head.

After you were done you flushed and pushed yourself up with a groan. You brushed your teeth and watched Cassian, he was standing behind you with a worried expression.

“I think we need to go see Madja” he said and took a step closer. He wrapped his hands around your waist and kissed your head.

“I’m okay… it’s probably something I ate” you shrugged “you should get to training, the valkyries are probably waiting for you.” You smiled.

When he was gone you got dressed and walked to Azriel’s room. You knocked and waited.

The past few days you’ve been feeling way too tired and now this? Something was going on and if it wasn’t what you thought it was you wouldn’t stand to see Cassian’s face so you didn’t tell him.

Azriel opened the door and you explained the situation to him, he hugged you and grabbed his coat. The flight was silent and you reached Madja’s infirmary rather quickly.

She glanced up when you walked in and smiled.

“I think this time it’s really happening” you grinned and she cheered.

She guided you to a small bed and you laid down on it, Azriel was still standing by the door, his hands in his pockets as he didn’t know what to do.

“Az can you come here? I don’t want to do this alone” you called and he rushed to your side.

“Of course” he smiled and faced the other way when Madja pushed your dress up and spread your legs. After a while she smoothed your dress and got up. You and Azriel stared at her, your faces red from the anticipation.

“Congratulations” she smiled.

You jumped off the bed and squealed. Azriel picked you up and spun you around.

His voice muffled by your hair as he shouted “I’m going to be an uncle”

Before taking you home you went into a store and bought a dagger, it had red stones on the handle and you asked the blacksmith to engrave “To the best daddy”.

When it was done you picked it up and Azriel flew you home.

You placed the dagger on Cassian’s pillow and hid in the bathroom when you heard his footsteps.

He walked in, sweaty from the training and panting.

“Doll?” He asked and scanned the room with his eyes. He noticed the dagger and furrowed his eyebrows, he picked it up and placed it next to the others on the small desk with a shrug. You sighed and banged your head on the door.

“Oh come on, you’re not going to examine it? You just found a random dagger on your bed” you exclaimed and walked out of the bathroom. Cassian smiled sheepishly and picked up the dagger again.

He frowned when he noticed the engraving and then he froze. His eyes widened and he looked at you.

“Here it says to the best daddy…are you…or you just decided to start calling me daddy?”

You snorted and approached him, grabbing one of his hands and placing it on your abdomen. You smiled softly and nodded.

“Mother’s tits I’m going to be a daddy” he screamed and picked you up, he started running around the house with you in his arms screaming “I’m going to be a daddy” again and again. Everyone there was cheering and clapping but that wasn’t enough for him…nooo… he reached the balcony, flared his wings and with you still in his arms shoot up, circling around the city and screaming “I’m going to be a daddy”.

Requests are open!

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 2 months

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WIBTA if I called out my uncle for being a slob?

Emoji chain: 🧼🧼🧼🧼🧼🧼

So my uncle lives in a different state from me, and I rarely see him. But recently, for the first time ever, he stayed at our house for a couple days.

My dad’s office can be transformed into a guest bedroom, so that’s where he slept. Since that room is right next to my bedroom, we shared a bathroom.

And wow. Just wow. He is absolutely disgusting. The first thing I noticed was his toothbrush, which was covered in dried toothpaste and really gross. And throughout his few days, he left my bathroom in a truly horrible state.

Every time he showered, the floor was covered in water. Whenever he used the toilet, the seat was absolutely covered in…I don’t even know but it smelled horrible. And when he left, I noticed that the bathroom was covered in these weird things that looked like something off his body, but I don’t know what.

Now, all of this is really annoying and gross, but technically harmless. However, his behavior is literally DEADLY. Let me explain. My dog has chronic pancreatitis, and will die if she ingests any human food. My uncle knows this, and somehow still manages to get food all over the floor. And not small pieces either, this is like massive chunks. And he doesn’t even clean up after himself! Like what???

He’s staying with us again right now, and I’m freaking done. I didn’t do it last time because I thought it would be too rude and I didn’t want to strain our relationship, but I really need to have a firm talk with him. He’s our guest, and it’s just freaking common courtesy to leave the house the same, or better than you found it. Not worse.

So yeah, would I be the asshole if I confronted him about this disgusting behavior? By the time this comes out, he’ll be gone, but I need to know for next time he stays over.

P.S. I’m an only child, so I’m not used to other people being in my space. So that could be a part of why I’m so annoyed.

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole #unsanitary cw

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mochiimadness · 2 years

Text

I just threw up- it’s 1:40am

Now you get the turtles reacting to you throwing up :)

Neon Leon

He screams

You’re fighting for your life over the toilet and he’s watching in terror in the background

Collects himself pretty quickly though and portals you some pepto bismol and water

And a ton of mouth wash

Anything else you need- he’s got it for you ready to go

He kneels behind you and rubs your back soothingly

If your hair is long enough to get in the way, he’ll hold it back for you

Helps you clean up after

After you brush your teeth and chug some mouth wash, he’ll give you his shirt and shorts to change into

Cuddles you on the couch and keeps a trash bag next to y’all

Smooches your forehead

Definitely takes a selfie of you two

You look a mess and are wrapped up in a blanket

He’s got an arm around you and looks like a stresssed chihuahua

“It’s to commemorate our first throw up session together!”

Leo why

He posts it

Leo pls-

“I’ve never met anyone who looks as stunning as you while throwing up-“

He’s trying

Don Tron

He’s fighting for his life right next to you

Desperately trying not to throw up too

Talking to himself trying to keep the vomit down

“Keep it down Vomi-tello-“

Watches you throw up more

“Keep it down baby-“

At some point you probably tell him to leave

He runs out

Does come back in once you’re done scarring the toilet

Runs you a hot shower so you can clean up and feel better

If you let him join you he’ll scrub your back for you

If your hair is long enough he’ll help you detangle it

Bonus- you get to gently wash his soft shell too if you feel up to it, a super rare chance

Dries you both off and you both brush your teeth

Challenge each other to see who can gargle mouth wash the longest

Will bring you back to his room and the two of you bundle up into blanket cocoons

Will hold your hand for a bit and apologize for running out

You forgive him

“I can put on a movie if you want?”

Leo definitely has a video of him running out of the bathroom trying not to puke

Mystic Mike

Disappears into his shell from how scared he got when he opened the bathroom door and saw you violating the toilet

Pops back out and gags

Manages not to puke and gets his dry heaving under control before helping you

“Umph- you’re gonna be okay! I believe in you!”

Runs out to snatch a water bottle for you

He will kneel down next to you and massage your shoulders like he’s a boxing coach prepping his fighter

“You can do this!”

Very supportive

Grabs a hair tie to keep your hair out of the way if needed

Once you’re done puking your guts out and brushing your teeth, he gives you the water bottle

Will also give you his clothes to change into

“Aw see- nice and comfy and vomit free! Plus you look adorable!”

Very sweet

Brings you to the kitchen to make you some soup

Insists it’ll help take the bad taste out of your mouth and settle your stomach

Don’t want soup? He’s got icecream!

You two sit in the kitchen and snack until you feel better

You both probably end up passed out on the couch

Raph covers y’all with a blanket

Big Red

Shrieks when he sees you

Is panicking in the background and running back and forth

You’re trying to tell him everything’s okay while puking

“This is fine.” :’)

“I’M SUPPOSE TO BE TELLING YOU THAT!”

Will calm down enough to hunch over you

He’s rubbing your back as gently as he can

Helps you up to the sink when you’re done

He picks you up after you’re done gargling mouthwash and sprints to his room

Puts you on his bed and literally makes a nest out of his blankets and pillows for you

You’re swallowed by a sea of blankets

He runs out and comes back with some pills for nausea and a ton of water bottles

Also has grapes for some reason??

“Okay okay I have pills and water and uh- I wasn’t sure if you wanted a snack so I just brought some grapes!”

He’s so worried

Mother hen

Sees you drowning in pillows and fishes you out while apologizing

Wraps you in a blanket and sits with you in his lap

Will feed you grapes and water

Wraps his arms around you and rocks you gently

I don’t care how tall you are, you are dwarfed in his arms

You’re definitely not getting out of his embrace anytime soon

You fall asleep like that, it’s actually really comforting

10/10 for trying and makes you feel protected

It’s now 2:16am pls send help

This is fine :’)

Not proof read cause I’m tired ;-;

Hope y’all enjoyed! Reblogs appreciated!!

Edit: fixed up some typos! Also I’m doing okay now :3

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aleksa-sims · 3 months

Text

Simselfstory

CW: Pregnancy, addiction

The one hour he gave me was over, but the doors were still open. Should I stay-… or should I go?

I tried to call N., he didn't answer.... Shit, N.! Don't you care about me???... But why do I even wonder? I knew why he ignored me. We agreed on this! And well, that's N.! That's how he is. No matter what happens, he never deviates from the course. So even if I call him 100 times, he won’t pick up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😩

Before I go back to the current events, I quickly explain what Nico and I have discussed.

N. knew, as long as I haven’t cleared everything up with Daniel, D. would haunt my mind forever. So he wanted me to go to him and talk to him. And Nico and I weren’t together at the time, so he told me to do what I want with Daniel! 7 days, he said. After that, he wants an answer from me! No sooner or later! After my time with D.'s over, he'll talk to me! I didn’t agree with the 7 days, I thought I could settle this matter with Daniel within 24 hours. But well, Daniel’s answers to my questions have changed everything. So decided to stay! 7 days!

As you can see above, I just did my laundry. I had no comfy underwear here in Daniel’s and my apartment. While I was busy filling our washer, I noticed Daniel’s pills on the counter next to his things. At the same time, it rang at our door, but I didn’t care...

Shit, that’s the good stuff! The pills I was hooked on in the past... I’d love to get high. Right now, more than ever....

What the fuck did I do!???????? 😨 I’m pregnant, damn it!! What's wrong with me?.... 🤮🤮 Agh, I was damn lucky. I didn’t swallow the pill, I just had it in my mouth and I spit it out.

Meanwhile, I heard Daniel talking to someone on our doorstep.

Daniel: I’m not interested in this job. Sorry, you got me wrong. But be honest, is that really why you came by, to offer me a job? Or is this about Alex?

Girl: No, I’m here for you. Besides, I know Alex doesn’t live here and I don't care tbh. The other day we were here, he told me.

Daniel: It’s none of my business anyway. However, I don’t need any help or a job. You're wasting your time. I'm pretty busy rn so...

How could I have done that? How could I forget I was pregnant?...... I was still standing in our tiny......... toilet-room (?). The window was open. I could hear Daniel & that girl talking about a job. Does he know I’m eavesdropping on them? Is that why he’s in such a hurry to get rid of her?... Agh, I'm such a mess.🤦‍♀️ Why am I even thinking about that girl? I want to get a divorce!! I should rather think about what I just did!!! I’m not even 24 hours here and all I care & think about is that damn drug and............ Daniel. 😖

Daniel (to me): You know what’s about to happen. Last chance! If you don’t go, you’ll be locked up here with me tonight.

Girl: Um, I better get going. See you. 😬

Me: I just wanted to go over, to the bathroom. Who-... was that? 😳

Daniel: Weren’t you going to the bathroom? 🤨

Me: What- 😶‍🌫️😳

Daniel: Coincidentally, I want to take a shower, now! 🤷‍♂️ But we can do it together, I don’t mind.

Daniel: Come closer..... It’s been a long time.

Me: You're playing me. 😳😔

Daniel: Why do you think so? You want me too, that's why you stayed. I mean, you literally lured me into the bathroom. And you look hot, you got me horny. 😏

Me: No, I wasn’t trying to seduce you. I only wear... this, bcs I have nothing else here.

Daniel: I don’t care! We’re married and I wanna fuck you, babe.

Me: Btw, when did you get the divorce papers? 🤨

Daniel: Um..... 5 weeks ago?

Me: Exactly!.... What were you waiting for, Daniel? Why didn’t you call me, once you got better? Admit it, you’ve been thinking about breaking up with me, too. Alex told you what I said to him. And that girl earlier... Idk who she is, but I have heard it all! She's been here once.

Daniel: Yes! I was thinking about signing your fucking divorce petition. I was mad at you! Anyway, go up and wait for me. There’s still a lot we need to clear up. But this here, we'll definitely keep up tonight.

Me: Well, let's see.

Previous/Next

#ts4 #sims 4 #sims 4 story #rl story #cw addiction #myrlgameplay #cw pregnancy

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robynlilyblack · 2 years

Note

Hey Robyn! I know you have a lot of request right now, but I just read this and got an idea, so no rush! (like seriously cuz I don’t want to pressure you)

So Sirius x reader were he ate chocolate for the first time after becoming an animagus and got very sick so his girlfriend had to take care of him and he just get on full puppy mode

I kept telling that l’m gonna request for someone else but I kept coming back to sirius😭 I really want to request remus tho, I’ll let you know if I got any ideas. Thanks Robyn and have a good day!

-Alex

Sick

Sirius Black x fem! marauder! reader

Summary: Y/n and James come back to the boys dorm to find Sirius very unwell

Warnings: established relationship, mentions of eating, food, feeling and being sick (tw: throwing up)

A/n: 1.1k words, hi alex! Honestly same I always return to Siri, hope you have a good day/night too! Thanks for the request, enjoy xx

Navigation | Sirius Black Masterlist

“Pete…Wormtail” you correct yourself causing James to chuckle “Is gonna kill us when he finally weasels away from that puff” you cringe giggling softly

“Probably but let’s not mention this to Re…Moony just yet. He got the good chocolate yesterday and he won't give us any if finds out what we were using our new abilities for today”

You giggle nodding “That’s if he and Siri leaves us any…what?” you eye your friend

“Nothing, just cute you call him Siri” he mocks you and that earns him a playful shove

“Fuck off” you whine “He’s my boyfriend now…oh my god Jam…Prongs” you jump up and down “Sirius Black is my boyfriend!” you say excitedly, still in disbelief that you and he were really together

James lets out a laugh “Hell yeah he is” he wraps his arm around you “I’d say you’re a lucky gal but let’s face it he’s a lucky man…dog…pup?”

You and James are in fits of giggles as you enter the boy’s dorm, but they fizzle out when greeted with Remus on his bed looking a little worried

“You okay mate?” James asks while your eyes search the room for Sirius

“Where’s…” you start only to hear the sound of retching coming from the bathroom “Is that?” you look towards Remus

When he nods you run through into their bathroom, finding Sirius hunched over on the floor, turning to look up at you as you close over the door behind you

“Darling please go wait outside…” he sucks in a breath “…I don’t want you to see…” he can’t hold it in, turning to continue throwing up in the toilet, hands clutching the edges of the bowl, knuckles turning white

You quickly move next to him, pulling his hair from his face and holding it back with one hand “I’m not going anywhere” you kiss his temple

His breathing is heavy when he finally stops and looks back up at you, face chalk white “Still fancy me?” he jokes

You nod “Very much…but I’m going to kiss your forehead because well…” you scrunch your nose and bob your head, making him chuckle as you kiss his hair line

“Don’t blame you darlin” he shifts back onto his butt and as you let go of the make shift pony tail you shuffle over to wrap your arm around him

“You feeling a bit better now pup?” you test the waters with the nickname, heart fluttering as his ears literally pick up at it

He gives you a lazy toothy grin “Call me that again?” he sucks on his bottom lip for a moment

“Call you what?” you reply coyly, grabbing a spare hand towel and wetting it

He huffs at that

“Don’t tease me when I’m sick” he pouts, arms hugging himself

You cup his jaw “I’m so sorry puppy” you smile at his giddy reaction as you gently wipe the sick from the corners of his mouth and chin

“You should be a nurse” his hand gently caresses your knee “Everyone would fancy you”

You shy away at the complement, placing the towel up and over the sink “Would they now?”

“They would, almost as much as I do” he scoots closer to you, head nudging into your armpit like he’s trying to get you to move, humming when you lift it up and slither it around his shoulders

“What happened?” your free hand goes to his stomach “Just a tummy bug?” you kiss his hair

He shakes his head “I think I have an incline…well a theory based off of a joke Re…Moony made” he lets out a nervous chuckle and you can feel his cheeks heating

“What would that be?” you lean forward to look at him, pressing your lips together as you are meet with your boyfriend’s big beautiful puppy eyes “Sorry but before you tell me” you bring your hand from his stomach to his cheeks and squish them “You’re so pretty puppy” you tease softly before retracting your hand

His cheeks are pink but his eyes let you know he fricking loved that

“I am your pretty puppy” he nods sincerely before his eyes widen mouth opening and closing as he grows flustered “D-did…I said that out loud, didn't I?” he closes his eyes

“You did” you place a kiss to his nose and he opens his eyes “I kinda like you like this” you confess

“I kinda like me like this too” he admits “Don’t tell…”

“My lips are sealed” you pretend to lock them

He smiles thankfully at you before his face contorts

“You going to be sick again?”

He shakes his head “No just tired and I have a headache now”

“You wanna lie down?” you offer "We can cuddle?"

“In a bit darlin the tiles are cold and my arse feels nice right now”

You giggle but nod at his reasoning, gently rubbing his lower back before he removes your hand and places the other around to the front

“So what is the theory?” you circle back to the cause of his sickness

“You remember when R...Moony made a joke about you walking around eating a raw carrot out of the blue like that bunny from those muggle cartoons?” you nod slowly “Well what if I’m sick because dogs aren’t supposed to have chocolate?” he poses

Your eyes widen, sitting back a second as it processes in your mind. It made perfect sense, no wonder Peter loved cosy blankets and little nooks to sleep in now, why you and James had suddenly started eating anything green, why Sirius was acting like a puppy at times

…like how you were currently giving him a belly rub...

“I think you’re right” you let out a tiny giggle “Aww puppy” you coo, taking his hand in when he seems upset

“Can’t believe I need to give up chocolate” he sulks “Fucking stupid...this is karma I swear for raiding his stash so often...what am I going to eat now”

You did find his pouting and complaining rather adorable

“Maybe we can find you a stick to replace it with” you tease

He scoffs “You’re mean” he lets out the smallest of chuckles

“You’re laughing”

“Am not” he tries to supress his smile and laughter but fails “Fine” he caves “But seriously why does the idea of a stick to chew on sound so appealing?” he whispers

You bite back laughter

“If you want tomorrow when you're feeling better we go to the forest and I can throw one for you to fetch” you offer

“100% serious?” he checks, making sure this isn't a joke

You nod “100% you yes” you giggle, more so as he hugs you tightly

“Merlin I’m so happy you’re my girl, no one else would understand or put up with me”

Meanwhile in the next room

“Why are you smiling?” James eyes Remus, a small smile on his face at his friend’s ecstatic look

“You remember when I was totally against you lot becoming animagi?” he replies, almost doing a little dance

“Yeah?” James extends the syllables

“I’m not as mad anymore” he says, eyes flicking to his chocolate stash

Thank you for reading 💛

#sirius black x reader #sirius black and reader #sirius x reader #sirius and reader #sirius black and you #sirius x y/n #sirius black #sirius black x you #sirius black x y/n #sirius black and y/n #sirius x you #sirius and y/n #marauders era #sirius black fanfiction #sirius black x female reader #sirius black drabble #marauders #robynsrequests

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mirkwoodshewolf · 1 year

Text

Big bros and period comforts; Steve Harrington x sister preteen reader

*Author’s note*

And here is yet another request that recently came to me so to the anon who asked for this, I hope you’ll find this in the tags when you go to search this up. Anyways like I said, while I do love seeing some romantic steve fics, I think he deserves some more platonic big bro fics cause let’s face it he may always be the babysitter but he’s sure as HELL one HELL of a damn good one and deserves to be a big brother.

Warnings: period descriptions, swearing, some angst, brotherly fluff, Steve being a good brother.

Taglist:

@plethora-of-things

@waddles03

@psychosupernatural

@queen-paladin

@jd-johndeacon-or-jackdaniels

@gay-and-ready-to-cry

___________________________________________________________

I tossed and turned in my bed feeling a cold sweat coming onto my brow. I have been feeling pain in my lower stomach since last night but I just labeled it to that Big Mac Steve got me last night but there was something in the back of my head that told me it wasn’t just the late night McDonald’s. I turned to my clock to see that it was just half past 6am.

I got up from my bed and went to the bathroom and when I pulled down my pants, I noticed how they were stained brown. What the hell?! I took them off and quickly closed and locked the bathroom door.

“Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit! This cannot be happening. Not now! Mom’s not even here to help me with this. I don’t know where she keeps her stuff at, hell she could’ve taken all of those stuff since she’s never home! I can’t-I can’t—I can’t do this right now!” I hissed as my lower stomach began to cramp up even more than it had all night.

I quickly sat on the toilet and did my business but I decided to just stay on it cause now my underwear was completely stained just like my pants.

“I can’t believe this is happening now. And why now? I wasn’t prepared for this. I can’t go to school like this. My insides are coming out of my outsides, my stomach is all in knots and cramping every ten seconds, I can’t do this!” I buried my face into my hands and felt tears burning in my eyes.

Great! Now I’m crying! I’m crying at the butt crack of dawn and all because of my stupid period finally decided to make its appearance right here and now with no one to help me through this.

“Hey (Y/n), you okay in there?” oh god no. And to make matters worse, Steve’s gonna find out. There is no way in hell I’m letting my brother anywhere near me in this state.

“Don’t come in here Steve!”

“I’m not. I just wanna know if you’re alright. You sounded pretty frantic just a bit ago.” Shit I forgot. Steve’s room is literally right across from the bathroom, he must’ve heard my frantic ranting earlier god why couldn’t I be quieter? Or better yet why can’t we have a soundproof bathroom?!

“I’m fine. Just go away now and don’t use this bathroom.”

“Sorry squirt but you do realize this is our bathroom. Not just yours.”

“You use this bathroom a lot longer than me and that’s just to do your stupid hair!” I snapped.

“First of all, cut the attitude. I get it’s early but there’s no need to throw a fit. Second, it’s not my fault mom and dad made us share a bathroom. And third, my hair is not stupid.”

“Steve just—leave me alone. I’ll be out soon okay, but just get out of here.”

“Fine. But if you’re not out in the next 20 minutes, I’m breaking down the door with my bat. And you know I’ll do it.”

“Yeah, yeah whatever your scary bat with nails. You take on a few Demogorgon’s and a few demodogs and you think you’re Hercules or something.” I said. I knew Steve probably was flipping me off and I heard the creaks of the floorboards leave the bathroom.

I turned towards my towel and wrapped it around my waist before peeking out the bathroom door just to be sure Steve was really gone. Once I knew he was, I quickly darted back to my bedroom, grabbed a fresh pair of underwear and raced back to the bathroom. I tried using toilet paper as a base to protect my underwear but it kept falling out or sticking out too far so I just decided to screw it and go bare.

Maybe if I just ignore it, it won’t leak or if I try to squeeze my legs together as tight as I could, maybe that’ll stop it from staining my underwear. I put on some new sweatpants and went downstairs to see Steve eating his breakfast.

“Finally done hogging the bathroom I see.”

“Haha you’re hilarious. Like I said, if either one of us is hogging the bathroom it’s use and your Farrah Faucet spray.”

“The threat still stands. I don’t care if you’re my little sister, you tell any of your nerdy friends about it, and like Henderson your ass is grass.”

“Whatever.” I said getting the count chocula. “Hey, do you know when mom’s coming back?”

“Why do you ask?”

“Because I said so now quit being a smartass. Do you or do you not know?” I snapped.

“You know I’m really not liking this sudden attitude (Y/n). You do realize I’m the older sibling around here.”

“Steve I’m serious just tell me when mom’s coming back!”

“I don’t know. You know her, sometimes she doesn’t call or even send us a letter to tell us when she’s staying on her business trips longer. Just like our old man.” I groaned and took my cereal upstairs. “Where are you going now?! Hey! (Y/n) I’m talking to you!”

“Well I’m through talking to you!”

“Hey!” he grabbed my arm roughly which caused me to drop my bowl of count chocula all over the floor.

“What the fuck Steve!?”

“Don’t turn this on me! Why are you acting like such a spoiled little brat!?”

“It’s none of your damn business!”

“When mom and dad are gone, that makes me in charge therefore what you do is my business!”

“This is basically child abandonment you’re not even 18 yet so you can’t legally watch over me for this period of time!”

“Whether we like it or not, that’s the way things are around here. Believe me I’ve dealt with it longer than you have. Now you have two options; tell me what’s wrong without the attitude, or you can continue to mope while I drag your ass to school.”

“Oh there’s no way I’m going to school today.”

“And why’s that?”

“I just am.”

“That’s not an excuse.”

“People do it all the time.”

“But not you. Your only excuse is if you’re dead, sick or just came out of the hospital for broken bones. And you’re not either of the three.”

“You wouldn’t understand.”

“What wouldn’t I understand?”

“You just wouldn’t.”

“Why? Because I’m stupid? Because I’m slow? I may not be as smart as you, but I’ll have you know that I—”

“This has nothing to do with scholastic intelligence Steve! This is because you’re a boy and I’m a girl so please don’t bother even trying to fix this because I know you won’t want to!” I took back my arm and immediately raced upstairs and slammed the bathroom door shut before feeling the tears coming down my face.

I slid down against the door until my butt hit the floor and I wept into my knees as I wrapped my arms around my legs. My shoulders shaking as I choked on some sobs.

Truthfully I hate fighting with my brother. We’ve been fighting for years ever since he became ‘King Steve’ and only just recently with the whole Upside down have we’ve tried to rebuild our relationship with each other.

Now thanks to my stupid period and damn hormones, I might’ve fucked everything up. I didn’t mean to snap at him but I knew he wouldn’t understand this. No guy would, hell just last year when I got with the guys after our first ever health class (when they separated all the guys and girls to talk about the reproduction stuff and how our bodies change and shit as we get older), Dustin, Mike, Lucas and Will were all pretty scarred from it. So if they acted like that, how would my own brother act alone when I told him I finally started my period?

Knock. Knock.

“(N/n)?” Steve’s voice said in a more calming manner. “Did you—what you said back there, did you umm…..you know?” there was the awkwardness in his tone. He was starting to piece it together.

“What would you’re answer be if I said yes?” I asked as I wiped away my tears.

“Well…..I’d tell you that if you needed, you know the pads. There’s some in the bathroom vanity just above the towels.” Wait what?

“How did—”

“I had seen mom take the last remaining stuff she had before they left. I figured you’d need some just in case it happened now or something.”

“You—bought period pads?”

“Well I wasn’t gonna buy you those tampons. Not even I know how the hell they work. So if you’d think you’d be using those, think again.” I stood up and went over to the vanity closet and just as Steve said, on the shelf above the towels were some pads.

I reached up and took a box down and slowly opened it up. I took a pad out and took off the tape before unfolding it to reveal the pad inside.

“I think you first place it on the—”

“I can manage Steve!” I quickly interrupted him feeling my cheeks flush in embarrassment. “Don’t listen Steve!”

“Okay, okay my ears are covered.” I heard him say from behind the door.

“You swear it?”

“What was that? I can’t hear you my palms are practically sucking out my brains.” I rolled my eyes at him. I took the pad out of the sleeve and saw the wings tucked in under the tape. I placed the pad along the main part of my underwear and then removed the small square tape holding the wings in and then folded them over my underwear to make them stay. I pulled my underwear back up and then put my pants back on before coming out of the bathroom. There Steve stood against the right side of the door with his ears covered.

I tapped his elbow and he looked down at me and I motioned for him to uncover his ears. He did as I told him and he asked me.

“How you feel?”

“Like I got a diaper on.”

“Unfortunately that’s something you’ll have to get used to. Maybe next time we need to do a store run you can come with me and you can pick out—” I stopped him by exclaiming and shaking my head.

“Why are you the one talking about this?”

“What do you mean?”

“Oh c’mon Steve, don’t pretend. I know you’re trying to pull off the supportive big brother card on the outside but on the inside, I know talking about this stuff is really making you uncomfortable. Squeamish even.” He hummed for a second before saying.

“Not really.”

“Stop lying.”

“I’m not, seriously. You think if I were that squeamish I would’ve bought you those pads in there?” I shrugged. “Well I’m wasn’t.”

“But didn’t you get weird looks when people saw you buying this stuff?”

“Some douchebag guys did, but when I told them it was for my little sister they shut up. Then next thing I knew, one of the store’s female employees told me to get you that brand of pads for a first time period.”

“That story true?”

“As true as the nose on my face. Listen,” he placed his hands on my shoulders and we looked at each other. “I know you wish mom were here. She could answer the questions I know that are going through your mind. And she could definitely answer them a lot better than I ever could. Unfortunately, that’s not the case. But you don’t have to be embarrassed about coming to me with these types of things. I had to sit through three years of health class just like I know you are doing right now when they first did it to you guys last year. They still do that thing where they separate you girls and boys and—”

“Yes Steve. They did it last year and we’re supposed to do it again in two weeks.”

“Okay and again they’ll do it when you go into 8th grade. But my point is, it’s biology. You’re not the only girl going through this, and you certainly won’t be the last.”

“I’m sorry I was such a bitch earlier Steve. I was just—scared but also angry and god I don’t even know what other emotions. But I remembered how last year Dustin and the guys came out of that first health class and they had that thousand yard stare. Like they had been to hell and back, and that was before Will had even disappeared into the Upside down. I thought you’d get that same look or be so uncomfortable you wouldn’t even want to be near me.”

“Well unlike your friends, I’ve lived through this with many girls. Plus I’m more mature to handle that type of stuff than they are.” I couldn’t help but laugh and shake my head. “I’ll allow that just for today. So besides starting your period, anything else bothering you? Cramps? Cold sweat?”

“I’ve been having bad cramps all night, didn’t really sleep well.”

“Okay, so back into bed with you missy. No school for you today.” He said guiding me back to my room.

“I thought you said—”

“Again making an exception. I’ll call the school and tell them you’re sick today.”

“Ahh man!”

“What you have a test or something?”

“No. But Max was gonna teach me some cool moves on her skateboard today.”

“Well she’s gonna have to suck it up and hear your excuse tomorrow. For now, into bed.” He removed the covers and it was then we both saw the stained brown spot on the bed.

“Oh god!” I exclaimed turning embarrassed.

“Hey no worries. Just change the sheets, like I said no big deal.” He tucked away my two main sheets before starting to remove the main bed sheet over my mattress and wadded it up before taking it out of the room. A few minutes passed and he came in with a new bedsheet and asked me, “Care to help me out with this?” I nodded and together we placed the new bed sheet over the mattress before placing my pillows and blankets back on the bed. “Alright, now that that’s taken care of, into bed.”

I did as he said and he tucked me back into bed.

“Need a heating pad? Nance used to say they always helped whenever her cramps got really bad.”

“Can it really do that?”

“Yeah something about extreme heat helps ease the muscles or something. I really can’t remember, maybe you could ask her next time you’re over at Mike’s.”

“You’d really allow me to talk to your ex-girlfriend?”

“There’s no law that says you can’t talk to her even after our breakup. Plus she did enjoy having you around, I’m sure she’d be happy to give you any advice on this kind of stuff.” I nodded. “So heating pad? Got any cravings? I’ve seen and heard some girls talk about their cravings for sweets, mainly chocolate. Would you like some?” I nodded. “Okay, back in a few.” He soon left my room once more.

Even after our intense spat this morning, once he understood what was happening he really was becoming a good big brother in helping out his little sister in her time of need. Not walking around eggshells or being super awkward about it, he understood and seemed to have everything I needed.

Soon he came back with the heating pad, some Hershey bars and a few bags of M&M’s, as well as some of my favorite movies.

“Okay so put this against your lower abdomen, and I’ll plug it up and switch it onto warm first. Then we’ll see if you want to go hotter or cooler.” He handed me the heating pad and I did as he said while we went over to my desk and plugged it into the socket just underneath my work desk.

He flipped the switch and soon I began to feel the warming sensation starting to come around my lower abdomen. I moaned in relief as I shut my eyes and held the heating pad closer to me. I felt something tap my forehead and I saw Steve holding one of the Hersey bars.

“Figured you’d want to eat this now before you pass out.” I took the bar from him and unwrapped it before taking a bite out of it. I don’t know whether it was the hormones or the enhanced senses from my period but this was the absolute, most heavenly thing I’ve ever had in my entire life (and I’ve been eating Hersey bars and kisses for as long as I can remember).

He set the rest of the candy at my bedside and he stroked my hair before telling me.

“I’m gonna quickly call the school and then get your sheets in the washer.”

“Directions are taped to the dryer.” I told him.

“I know, I know. God you let the washer overflow one time.”

“Twice. Remember the first time when mom and dad came early to see soap all across the hallway.”

“Right. But you just get some sleep okay kid?” I nodded. He leaned forward and kissed my forehead gingerly before brushing some of my hair out of my face. “I’ll check on you in a bit.”

“Thank you Steve.” I whispered before feeling the pull between consciousness and unconsciousness and the urge to sleep gripped tightly on me. And thanks to the heating pad, it was increasing greatly.

“You’re welcome (Y/n). Sleep well.” He then went over to the tv and turned it on and the last thing I heard was the opening to Lady and the Tramp playing in the background.

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fizzingwizard · 2 months

Text

I feel a need to write about today minute by minute. It's always annoying to forget details and remember them inconveniently at the wrong time, but not at the right now. And I need to vent as usual lol. Oh work.

At 9:45, I take my students to the bathroom. One pees on the floor. I am calling and calling his name, I am standing next to him, looking right at him, but he is just staring at nothing, peeing on the floor and his shoes. I absolutely do not get it. He was in another world. So I'm dealing with the mess and ask my coworker (A) to switch lesson time with me so she can teach during my slot while I clean.

When I get back to my room, 1 is teaching and the kids are misbehaving. Coworker 2 is there. B2is brand spanking new. Joined us literally last week. She is nice and hard working, I don't think she has much experience with little kids though. I have no doubt she'll get the hang of it soon, but as for now she really doesn't know what to do. I do my best to get the class in order as well as prep for the next things.

1 finishes and I teach my lesson. Challenging student A is crawling around the back of the room. 2 is trying to stop A. I try to tell her to leave him alone. We suspect he's on the spectrum, but he's too young for a diagnosis, so my choice has been to let him take the lead with what he wants to do as long as he isn't a danger to himself or other kids. There is too much pressure on young kids in Japan to be "well-behaved," and while in a school group certain behaviors are important, I'm not trying to force my students to be robots. 2 just isn't familiar with A, but I, the teacher who is familiar with him, have to teach my damn lesson. Then Challenging student I kicks up his usual mid-lesson fuss, so I ask 1 to take him for a walk outside for a couple minutes. I can't go handle him myself because I. Am. Teeeeeaachinggggg. 1 has a tough time with him and the manager gets involved.

I finish the lesson and get my kids ready to go outside. We go to the toilet then have a drink. I ask 2 to help the kids get their water bottles because another student is having a melt down, so I'm dealing with them. When I look over, the kids have all attacked the water bottle basket. They are supposed to sit by the wall and wait for their name to come get their water bottle, but they either didn't listen to 2, or 2 didn't understand how much leadership is needed with toddlers even over very small things. So I have to go and fix the water bottle situation. Then Youngest student K pees all over her pants, despite sitting on the toilet not five minutes ago and refusing to pee, lol. So 1 comes back and changes her. I don't even remember what 2 was doing at this point, but she was occupied with something.

The energy among the kids is Chaos. You get familiar with it. After trying everything in the book, I finally decided we were not in the right atmosphere to go outside. I had them sing a quiet song, fix our listening ears, and then, one by one, I called them by name to chose an activity to do indoors. After a while 1 is done cleaning up K, and I have no idea what 2 was doing. I facilitate everything with the activities and it's the most peaceful it's been all day.

We clean up and then go back to the bathroom. I send 1 and 2 back with about half the class to start getting ready for lunch. When I get back with the rest of the kids, it's loud and crazy, A is crying on the floor, 1 is trying to calm him down, 2 looks like she doesn't know what do first. I give A a hug and he calms down right away. I get my toy megaphone and have the kids sing a song with it. We have lunch. I'm dying.

After lunch: A refuses, as he always does, to clean up his fork and spoon. He throws his jelly cup. 1 takes him aside to explain to him why it's dangerous to throw things. He throws a fit. I don't know this is going on because I'm helping other kids. I don't know what 2 was doing again except for understanding she couldn't be left to make decisions. So I can't leave the room for the next bathroom trip while 1 is with A. She's gone for a while and A is just crying and crying. Finally she comes back, and I just grab 2/3s of the kids and take them to the bathroom. I am not "supposed" to have that many kids with me by myself. But this is the fact: I was better equipped to take care of that many kids than my coworkers were to take care of the few who I left behind with them.

I did have to leave Challenging student TE behind because he was so over the top wild all day, and had just been hitting and poking other kids. Since I had to leave, I had him sit in a chair and told him, as well as both co-teachers, that he needed to sit there for one minute, then he would be allowed to go read a book. When kids are this young, making them sit somewhere to "think about their actions" is totally counter-productive. They forget really fast what they're even supposed to be reflecting on and only remember that they're unhappy. There is no point and it's mean to do it to them. The point of putting TE in the chair was for him to calm down. Ideally I would have been with him, but if you haven't noticed (which I think my school hasn't sometimes!) I am only one person and can't be EVERYWHERE, I DO need support from co-teachers. But I did my best to compromise - since I couldn't be there, I made sure my co-teacher understood TE could leave the chair and read a book, he was NOT in time out or any kind of punishment.

We luck out that being so late means we don't have to compete with other classes for the toilets, and we're done in ten minutes. We get back to the room. Two teachers with a small group of fairly easy kids and the room's not clean yet and the kids aren't all cleaned up from lunch yet. AND!! T is still in the chair. Not only is TE still in the chair, but N has crawled behind him and they're giggling together. This means TE was in the chair for at least ten minutes, WAY too long. (And much longer than I had specifically said!) Also no one was watching N. Again, there were TWO teachers in the room with a small number of kids - so small that it was under ration for JUST ONE OF THEM. I HAD ALL THE REST. BY MYSELF. I want to cry I swear I want to cry just remembering it.

Well anyway! Fizz is back now so let's get things in order. I ask 1 to take the kids who had been left in the room to the bathroom. 2 finishes the cleaning while I watch the class play. Peace finally returns for a while. It's clear we aren't going to do ANYTHING constructive today, but sometimes with toddlers it is what it is. At least they are happy and playing well together for the most part.

So, when 1 comes back, I decide it's time to deal with A. A is extremely, extremely challenging. He is a total sweetheart, but he's got what we'd call a defiant personality. He simply doesn't understands the difference between responsibility and being forced to do things. Choice is very important to him. That is fine in general, but it's not fine, for example, if his choice is to whack another kid with a toy, or to stick his hand down the toilet, etc.

A's mom is trying hard to potty train him, so she is sending him in underwear every day. The problem is, A is defiant about going to the toilet. So he wears underwear but holds in his pee all day until he wets his pants. Our strategy, with mom's approval, is not to force him. Of course we don't force ANY of our kids to do things, but what I mean is, to A, things feel like being "forced" which to other kids are just "mild persuasion." We don't want A to feel that using the toilet is a negative experience where his feelings don't matter. We also know A does much much much MUCH better one on one than in groups. So we have found that if we take him to the toilet AFTER all the other kids have already gone, he can do it.

1 had a hard time with A today because said "it's scary" and "go away" and was rude to her. I did explain that A is only saying these things because they get a result. He's not actually afraid of the toilet. He uses it perfectly fine when he's in the right mood. He also isn't afraid of A, who is, if anything, too nice with the kids lol. He has said the same things to every other teacher as well. It's a power move: he isn't hurt. However, since 1 and A have had a few unproductive clashes all day (and still are: A is refusing to clean up from lunch even now), I decide it's not a good idea to ask 1 to take A to the toilet. However, A still needs to go. It's not good to hold your pee in so long. And having random days where he doesn't get a chance to use the toilet at the usual time is not good for his potty training either.

So I talk to 1 and 2 individually and tell them that I am taking A to the toilet, and that they don't have to do anything except watch the kids play. I tell 2 especially which kids need extra careful watching because they sometimes play rough. It's peaceful when A and I leave the room.

Well, I got A to pee in the toilet no problem. He said "no" only a couple times and then just went and did it. Yay. It took some comforting first but progress is progress.

I get back to the class and - someone bit TA on the hand while I was gone. NEITHER of the two teachers in the room saw it. Full disclosure - it happens. We do our best, but not even pre-K teachers have eyes on the back of their head. But this coming after the entire rest of the day - I just felt like I couldn't leave the room, but also no one else could leave the room when kids needed to. I had to be there and be elsewhere and be with every kid somehow. 1 and 2 tell me they think S bit TA because that's what the other kids said. This is terrible news, because S does not handle being "in trouble" well, no matter how much we reassure she isn't. But I have no choice: I have to take S and TA into the hall so we can talk about what happened.

I have no intention of accusing S of anything teachers didn't witness her do. My intent is to ask her if she bit TA, and when she inevitably said no, to explain to both of them why gentle hands are important during play time, and then let S go back to playing. If no one saw her and she says she didn't, I have to believe her. Besides - in my own opinion, it's unlikely she bit TA. She can get rough sometimes, but it would be the first time she ever used her teeth. TE, however, was a biter in the spring. He got much better for a while, but only a couple weeks ago he bit both me and 1. He bites as a form of play, not in aggression. Since we have a biter in the class, I think it's more likely him than S, who has never bitten another kid before. However, I wasn't in the room at the time, and my impression from what the other teachers told me, just then, was that they thought it was highly likely S had bitten TA. Only later did I find out they weren't really sure. What I would have done if I'd realized is talk to the class as a whole, rather than take one child aside.

S had a total melt down. She's a fighter, thrashes, kicker, and screamer when she is upset. I asked the manager to help because while I speak Japanese, my sometimes awkward grammar can be an impediment to an upset child, or an upset child's voice can be more difficult for me as a non-native speaker to understand. I tell the manager I want S to understand that I am not angry, she is not in trouble, we just want to hear from her if she was involved with what happened to TA, and that if she says she wasn't involved she will be believed. But S is too upset even to listen in her own language. It's clear that she's turned off words completely and is just melting down. In the end, she bumps her head thrashing. It's hardly a bump, and tbh I'm grateful for it, because it calmed her down enough to listen to me offer to take her to get some ice for it. Once I have the ice, she lets me hug her and finally lets me tell her that I love her and she is just fine. I ask her if she did anything to TA. She says no. I say okay, I believe you, shall we go play? And we go back to the manager to say thank you for helping, because I want S to have a good relationship with the manager too.

Get back to the classroom it's 1:40 aaaaaaahhh. I let the kids play a few minutes longer so that after all that drama S doesn't have to immediately clean up the toys when she finally gets back inside. We're late going to the bathroom. Somehow I get all the kids in and out, diapers changed, and ready for good-bye time and I get all their valentines sent home. We don't have time for more than one song, then it's nap time.

During nap time I direct my coteachers (a fourth part-timer, 4, has shown up just before good-bye time - I don't usually have three helpers, but I assume she was added to my room because the manager anticipated, to some extent, how rough we were going to have it with just me and two newbies) to change about five kids clothes. Because yeah, it's February, but holy shit it's HOT outside. I kept wanting to turn off the heat, only to look at the thermostat and realize it wasn't even on! I can't switch it to cool air by myself, so we just had the fan on, but with so many bodies it hardly helped. The kids should have been changed into cooler clothes much earlier. It was just another thing that I couldn't get done by myself. But now we're changing clothes left and right, especially those fleece-lined pants I despise so much. They're nice if you're outside, but little kids overheat in seconds: don't put them in heat-retaining clothes if they're going to be running around a lot, even in winter! Some kids are wearig threeeeeeeeeeee layersssssss. I know it's winter but it's winter in KANSAI it's nOT that big of a deal. We had two weeks below zero which was too cold for my heater, yeah, but only lasted two weeks! It's now warm enough in midday to go out without a jacket even! (Which is weirdly warm for the time of year even here tbh...)

I stay in the nap room through part of my off-duty time to make sure all the difficult nappers go to sleep, because yesterday they didn't, and another classroom teacher who had nap duty with them for a while afterward kept talking about how they were playing during nap but slept because she "didn't let them not sleep." Which made me feel like I was being accused of not being firm enough with them. Again, like I am the only teacher there. To be clear, I don't think that's what this teacher meant to imply. I think she was just talking. It's because I feel so pressured to do everything and to never take my own break time because my own kids need ME and won't accept the other teachers. It isn't because I'm too nice to them. It's because the other teachers are new and inexperienced, or part-timers who barely even know the kids. Of course they don't respond to them as easily. Of course they get better results when I'm there instead. But if I'm always there, I'm never off duty. And even if I never took breaks, I still have to do progress reports, lots of other paperwork, prep crafts and activities, wash and organize things, as well as my own daily assigned cleaning duty. I HAVE to be away from the kids for SOME portion of the day. The other teachers NEED to be able to put the kids to sleep without me!!!

Surprisingly at this point I wasn't feeling super stressed. We had survived the day - a kid got bit, which is never good, but it didn't break the skin, he's perfectly fine, and not to be cavalier about it but I've seen way worse. (Way worse happened in other class the same day actually.) If a class of toddlers gets to nap time safe and happy, the day's a success... that's the bar you shoot for sometimes lol.

But as I'm a huge overthinker, by 3:30 I had starting doom-telling the future, where I continue to have this situation of my kids being wild and me being the only teacher in the room with a voice. Me having to direct not only my students, not only one new co-teacher, but BOTH coteachers. Me having barely any support every day. My usual partner every year, 3, has wanted to quit all year. Her plan was to quit in September. No replacement was found by then, so she was convinced to stay till December. Surprise surprise, STILL no replacement. She agrees to stay till the end of the year BUT only three days a week, and what days those are keep changing. (Also, even on days when she's here, there's enough general chaos that she or 1 get sent to other classes to help them instead. So there's very little stability in my room apart from myself.)

I am questioning whether I should have stayed in the classroom when I left, or left when I chose to stay - I'm questioning every single thing that happened all day and it's like I just can't be everywhere. I need support. I can't be needed with the challenging students because 1 and 2 aren't able to handle them yet, but also needed with the rest of the students because 1 and 2 don't know what to do with so many kids. This is impossible, isn't it? This is ridiculous.

So I talk to the manager. She is very meek - clearly expected something like this. But she doesn't have anything to say. It's not in her power to make the experienced co-teachers we desperately need appear. It is the company's fault for continuing to enroll students even while we're understaffed :) and the majority of our staff now is very inexperienced :) :)

So she can't reassure me that this won't keep happening. (BTW, it's not the first time I had this coworker situation in the classroom - just more my breaking point.) She asks i I want her to talk to my co-teachers. I definitely don't. 2 only started last week - imagine getting a talk from the manager after only one week of work, while barely out of training, even a "nice" talk. 2 is a hard worker and I have no doubt she'll be great when she has some experience, but it's not going to happen fast, let alone in one week. And 1 has been here since June, but it's still her first year, her first job with kids, and she's barely 20. She's also trying super hard. I have no complaints about either of these coworkers that don't amount to they're just not ready for the level of responsibility they inevitably have when there are no more experienced teachers around. (Or only me, I should say.)

I did talk to 1 just to see how she was doing. She is a very upbeat person. I was nervous she would feel I was criticizing her, which is the opposite of what I want, but she was honest about her struggles with A and listened to my advice about letting him take the lead as long as he not dangerous. I also talked to her about letting TE sit in the chair so long and why it's not good for little kids. She was lovely the whole time. She's a very refreshing change from sensitive coteachers who treat every bit of not overtly positive feedback as a personal attack.

I'd like to say that's the end of my crazy day but guess what there's mooooore!!

PART TWO UNDERSTAFFING STUCKS

So like I've talked about endlessly, we've been understaffed all year. Our schedule was created under the assumption that 12 full time teachers would be at the school the majority of the time. The reality of this year, however, is that during our busiest time of day, from 4:00, we have like. Five.

My cluster of classes is particularly affected. I am the ONLY full time teacher there every day. One teacher always leaves at 4, two teachers are sometimes there with me but twice a week go home at 4:30 and may be off duty at 4:00, and one teacher is there till 4:30 but only three times a week. Since November we also got a bunch of part-timers who come in the afternoons. As nice as it is to have their help, they are a big part of the problem: the kids don't know them and they don't know the kids. They tend to sit in silence while the kids play and do very little to stop their misbehavior.

They also can't hand out snack because of allergy concerns. That is the reason why, since the beginning of the year, I have been on snack duty almost every day. As 1 got more accustomed to working here, she now helps with that, and another coworker from another class is there regularly now as well. But because I'm the only one guaranteed to stay at least until 5, it's still usually me. This duty is exhausting because kids are messy and there's a lot to do, and it's been an entire day so your body is ready to give out lol.

But the problem now is less that I'm tired while on snack duty and more that on days when the other teachers are gone from 4:30, I have to do ALL the duties to some extent. Today, for example. 1 left at 4:30. I was the only full-timer. One of the other teachers there is a sub, but one who is usually at our school four days a week. She's been with us all year and does know the kids. It's usually fine to have her in the room, except that she is a very quiet person and not very active. She listens to direction but doesn't necessarily notice things on her own. This wasn't fine today because the other two teachers were both brand new part-timers who don't know the kids.

All three of them were just. Sitting on the floor. Watching the kids play. Changing some diapers and struggling with the fussy kids because they don't know how to handle them. So who handled those kids? I did. I go over and voila, the kid who has been refusing to change her diaper for ten minutes suddenly is changed! Magic.

And the kids playing on the floor: they're gonna fight over toys, right. So who is going to mediate? Not the teachers SITTING RIGHT THERE ON THE FLOOR WITH THEM. Nope. Fizz is gonna have to put the vacuum down, pick my way through the kids with my gloved hands, and negotiate sharing of toys, then go back and continue to clean. And repeat over and over. When do I get to sit on the floor?? Lol.

It was a particularly messy snack (we all hate it) today, and usually the cleaning teacher can clean the silverware in the staff room. But because of the... uh... teacher situation, I didn't feel comfortable being out of the room even that long. So I stayed after I clocked out to clean it.

I also managed to take A to the toilet a second time!!! This is huge because he has so far refused to go to the toilet no matter what after nap, and I hated that he was just holding it in. He definitely has to pee after nap but just won't go. But I talked to him for a while, and suddenly he told me he would go if I carried "all" his toys. He enjoyed listening to me count them as he piled all nine of them x'D into my arms. Any other kid I wouldn't allow to do this, but A needs to feel like he's the leader and making his own choices. It's not dangerous, and it's getting him to go to the toilet happily for the first time ever. Which he did. He was an angel in the bathroom. I could have cried for the nth time today, but happy tears this time. I'm really proud of him.

Finally we reach the end of my day. It took an hour to type this out how I wanted it. But I'm glad, because I want to remember as many details as I can about what today is like. I had trouble figuring out what the core of the struggles today were. I tend to blame myself. Especially as the most experienced teacher, I felt everything that went wrong as a reflection of my lack of ability. But, while maybe it's difficult to say for certain about myself, after typing this I gotta admit I don't think I made bad decisions. I think I did the best that I could with what I was given. When I talked to the manager, I said "If I could do today over, I would skip brushing teeth time," because that is something we are allowed to skip if it's truly necessary - but then I realized that actually, the situation would have occurred anyway, because the kids still need to go to the toilet. They're potty training, they need to go the toilet no matter what. There's just no way I and my students could be in the classroom all day without ever leaving.

So on looking back I feel I really was put into a ridiculous situation, and have been all year long. I sometimes get so frustrated and feel like I'm an emotional wreck for getting frustrated easily. Then, when I really stop and think about the year as a whole, I wonder why I'm not MORE frustrated. I wonder why other teachers aren't more frustrated too. Or if they are and just quiet about it. It's just so ridiculous that all these problems would have been avoided by JUST STAFFING THE SCHOOL ADEQUATELY FROM THE START OF THE YEAR OMFGGGG

You'd think nearly every teacher quitting in a single year would signal something, but heads are turned the other way so convincingly that even I, who was there suffering with them, and am here suffering now too, start to think I'm the one who's perspective is skewed.

One final thought: part of the reason it's hard to talk about it at work when things are difficult for me is because another class has had an even rockier year. They went through THREE main teachers. Two quit. The third is a sub who didn't want to be a main teacher but was forced into it. At least she's still here. (And annoyed that she was refused the option of going back to subbing next year.) One of her part-time coworkers quit suddenly in January. The other part-time coworker is a sub (the quiet one I mentioned above). One full-time coworker only joined us in like September. She's good, good enough we often forget she's so new. But she IS new and that's just gonna be rough sometimes, no getting around it.

Also this class keeps getting given new students????????? I am SO confused why that is. The other comparable class has gotten a couple new kids, but it's like 2 kids to 5, AND that rocky class also has THREE kids who are technically "baby" age still. We used to have a required 1:3 ratio for that age of kids - used to until this year when the company needed to get more tuition money while paying fewer teachers 9_9 That age is hard AF. Also one of the new kids throws up. Like. Constantly.

#work #fizz's life #a novel

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deathsbestgirl · 6 months

Text

so. after my dad died, my family decided to get another cat. my sister found a black & white litter at a shelter. there was one named crossword puzzle. we tried to adopt him, because my dad loved crossword puzzles. he did the ones in the newspaper everyday (or stockpiled them for the days he had time) when he was sick we bought him books.

crossword puzzle was adopted already, but his brother newspaper was still available. and we picked him up the next day. he was the tiniest sweetest little thing. i remember asking if i could pick him up, as in did he like being picked up. they said yes and i did and we was just so calm. he slept all the way home, and then as soon as he was in my sister's room...he was CRAZY. he was so playful & energetic.

unfortunately, our first cat *hated* him. she was really sad after my dad died. he was her favorite person and we wanted to give her a buddy. but she was always an old lady, and her mom abandoned her. or her initial owners did. we found her on vacation in nj, she walked right into our hotel room. and so my mom named her jersey as suddenly we had our first cat. my parents wouldn't let me take her home with me (i left earlier than them) because they were worried about her wandering the car & distracting me. really, i think my dad just wanted to keep her. we didn't have a carrier or anything and they literally just created a little bed in a box for her. my dad pretended jersey drove him crazy but he loved her. he would always sit with her and it's the calmest she ever was.

anyway. eventually when my (now) wife moved in, we decided we wanted another cat. newspaper actually needed a friend. he loved other cats and jersey hated him!! (he wanted to love her and she just screamed & growled & smacked him if he got too close). so my sister found lily tomlin. we had just watched gsme of thrones and there was a picture of lily sitting in front of a tv screen watching game of thrones. that, along with her name, lead us to adopt her. (now htgsc is one of my favorite episodes and i know my dad definitely laughed at that one as much as i do.) lily is a little scaredy cat who also *needs* other cats. she hid behind our toilet and literally wouldn't look at us for two days. so eventually we just let her out and she started snugging us whenever we were sleeping. like waking me up at 3 in the morning to pet her, then hiding from us when we were awake. but when we had newspaper in the room, she would come out. she followed him around and did all the things he did. newspaper did not like her at first. but once he knew that he was in charge, he loved her so much.

then two years ago, my mom & sister were moved out of the house and me & renata were living in my childhood home with our friends. se decided to get another cat. my cousin had just adopted from a shelter so she suggested we take a look. there was a cat named boodles (worst name i have EVER heard) but he was the cutest little thing. another tuxedo (like newspaper, lily tomlin is black with a little white spot on her chest) another little guy who needs to be with other cats, and we had two kitty siblings for him. so we got him and changed his name to saturn, because we love astrology & space & my dad drove a saturn for years. we picked him up on christmas eve and he kept my whole family awake all night because he screamed the whole night lol (and then we all got covid 😭)

now they're all best friends who definitely still fight like siblings. and they all make me feel very connected to my dad. the little weirdos. all named for a connection to him.

(jersey is now my sister's cat and she pretends to hate me) ((and if anyone remembers me posting about lily tomlin getting out when we moved, she is safe at home again and there was only a very short adjustment period with her brothers))

#personal

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runawaymazola · 4 months

Text

New Life

Chapter 3:

| Masterlist | previous | Next |

----------------------------------

Third Person's POV:

watching Stray Kids performing on a big stage with thousands of fans really fascinating me. Their 'loud' music blasting the venue plus with the fans screaming enjoying their performance was a great experience. I don't understand people saying their music is loud but it's their style right? Plus it kinda insult me a little considering me co-write some of them, pfft. No biggie!

a group picture here and there, some with stays, some with staffs and some with me. Which happened because they dragged me along and posted them on their infamous Instagram account. People appreciates with them posting the pictures and somehow they wondered who is that guy with them?

I-it's me if you don't have a same thought as i am

they did not respond, of course. I wonder if fans would try to do some searching and see who the heck am i. Besides it would not be a problem since they even tagged me! A few minutes after the picture posted, my phone who is always silenced with no notification suddenly kept blasting and kinda annoyed me to be honest. It kinda confuses me with my mom's spamming messages but when i checked it's not from her, I put it away immediately.

noticing my action, Lee Know giggled and sat next to me, drinking mineral water he got earlier. " You're famous now, huh? " He smirked.

I'm not really that good with stranger but with this 8 guys- wait, minus chris, Han and Changbin, really made me nervous knowing new people. But i will be comfortable around them eventually. To my response, i just giggle and shake my head, " That is not my purpose. Just some side effect,am i right?" i winked at him (which i dont know how the hell i'm so bold) which causes him to be shocked and laughs.

with curiosity, a few other members came to us except Changbin. I think he went to the toilet earlier. I literally saw him ran to the toilet after the photo session.

" What are you guys talking about? " Felix asked. LeeKnow looked at him and pointed to me while saying, " This kid is going to be famous because we tagged him in our picture." then a few 'woahs' were heard and a few patting on my shoulders. "Guess you have to adapt to it now then. Cuz you will be seen a lot with us." Chris sat next to me and smiled as he put his sleeveless arm around my shoulder. Literally pulled me closer to him.

His big ass sweaty arms around me is what I dont want to touch me because bruv it's a little bit disgusting with the sweat and we're too close!

" Guys, let's get ready to go home now. " Mr Manager interrupted our conversation. "Home? Korea?" you looked at him.

"Yes, (Y/N). Korea" I swear i have never felt so excited hearing something, especially now that he mentioned we will finally be able to go-

" Yes! "

" Wait! What did i miss?! "

" Good job girls! Get some rest and we will go home! " Their manager yelled at the backstage.

After done performing at Coachella for the first time, the girls felt the energy of the crowd and became so energetic and fun to do their best on stage. Considering it is might be their first time in front of a big crowd to watch them, who would not be so nervous, right? Besides, the girls slayed Coachella believe it or not.

Heading to the dressing room, Karina heard Winter calling for her. Turning around she saw Winter running approaching her. " I want to talk with you about something. " She held the older's hand and pulled her to the quieter place they could find there.

" Why, Minjeong-ah? " Every seconds passed between them made her anxious as she is waiting for Winter to say something.

" I have been wanting to ask you this since this morning.. " The gray haired girl started and looked around not wanting any suspicious eyes nor ears listening to their conversation.

" What is it? Just tell me " Karina swear to got she is getting more nervous. Tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, Winter whispers, "I saw you earlier at the Yogurt place. You were eyeing that guy. Is it what i think it is? " And by that, Karina could feel herself started to blushing. Her mind started to playback the scene earlier at the Yogurt stall where she stared at the guy for god knows how long. She thought that no one saw her but she was wrong.

it was Winter.

" wha-what are you talking about, Winter-ah?? It's n-not what you think! " Karina yelled causes Winter shushed Karina because of sudden loud voice. " Don't talk so loud, unnie! People will know us here! "

" Besides, how come you noticed me looking at him? You must have been staring at him too right? Then you noticed it was not only you who did that, right? " Karina fought back. Winter widened her eyes and fidgeting with her fingers. Now, Winter is the one who is blushing. "N-no i am not. Besides if you do, i just want to tell you that i know who he is. " Winter winked at Karina which made her interest to know more about that mysterious guy becomes higher. Shaking her head, Karina replied,

" Why would i want to know about him? I was just curious at that moment. Nothing more. " Winter giggled and pulled out her phone. Probably searching for something.

" Besides, i don't know why i became so curious. Like, why would i wanna know about him? Really frustrated with myself " She hissed as she hugged herself and leaned to the van.

" ah! I found it! " Winter showed her, her phone showing a twitter of Stray Kids's recent Instagram post that the fans reposted earlier. " And why am i looking at Stray Kids's post? "

" Look at this friend of theirs. Is it him? The guy at the Yogurt place? He wore the same shirt and-- and it is that guy! He's trending all of sudden.." Winter kept scrolling down the tweets from Stays talking about this friend of SKZ's. Apparently, he is the eye candy of every one who saw him !

before the two girls could continue stalking the person, their manager called for them

" Aish there you two! Come! We need to start get ready to go back! " She yelled pulling them back into the backstage.

luckily for these two, the manager did not see what they were up to. Or else they would be busted and bombarded with lots of questions and stuff.

--------------------------------------------

a/n: I swear. it's awkward writing in Tumblr ;-; why everything is so messed up ;-;

taglist (open) : @myouiiiiiiii @beawolfbealionbeyou @ehcyps @1luvkarina

#aespa #aespa imagines #aespa karina #aespa scenarios #aespa winter #aespa x reader #karina x reader #minjeong x reader #yoo jimin x reader

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sooverwhitesandpinks · 2 years

Text

Bad Hair Day (Eddie Munson)

Summary: Eddie can't get his hair to lay down right.

Eddie Munson x Reader

Warnings: Fluff, Swearing, gn!reader

"C'mon Eddie, we gotta leave now to get to school," you shouted from outside of the bathroom door. You'd spent the night in Eddie's trailer after Hellfire Club the night before.

"I don't give a damn about school," Eddie shouted back, clearly frustrated. You slumped against the door.

"You were literally raving last week about how you were gonna do it this year. Remember? We're gonna get our diplomas together. You promised," you reminded.

"I'm not gonna graduate this year if my fuckin' hair doesn't cooperate. This always happens when you sleep over. You play with it and then it won't sit right for like two days," he grumbled.

"Just open the door and I'll help you with it," you singsonged. You'd gotten ready like twenty minutes before Eddie even woke up. You grabbed your bag from across the room, digging out your anti-frizz hair oil.

"Yeah right, you're the one who got me into this mess," he scoffed playfully.

"Oh whatever, Eds. Open the damn door. We can braid it before bed next time," you huffed, jiggling the nob again.

"Promise you won't laugh?" He asked, sounding closer to the door than he was before.

"I promise," you grinned, ready for the worst.

The door slid open, revealing Eddie surrounded by a halo of frizzy hair. You admit that it was a mess when he woke up, but he'd obviously made it worse in his attempt to tame it. You smiled at his adorable frustration.

"Help me," he huffed, nearly pouting.

"Oh babe," you pouted back entering the bathroom. You grabbed his shoulders and sat him down on the toilet. His hands immediately reached for your hips.

"What is that shit?" He asked, eyes trained on the hair product in your hand.

"Your saving grace," you grinned, pumping a few drops into your palm.

"That doesn't smell girly does it," he questioned, flinching away from your hands as you reached for his head.

"Do you want help or not?" You asked, rubbing the product between your hands.

"Fuck it. I have no one to impress," he shrugged, giving in. You gave his hair a tug. "Ow."

You didn't reply, just smirked while you ran your hands through his hair, calming it back down.

"There. Can we go now?" You asked, stepping from between his legs.

Eddie stood and examined himself in the mirror. He adjusted a couple pieces before he seemed satisfied.

"Hm. Have I told you how much I love you?" He asked, turning around and pulling you into his chest.

"I love you too, Eddie. But we're gonna be late," you replied, your chin resting on his chest as you looked up at him.

He gave you a kiss on the forehead before releasing you and heading toward the door. He plucked the van keys from the table and strolled outside.

"You comin'?" You heard him shout from outside as you picked your bag up and hustled behind him.

#eddie munson #eddie stranger things #eddie x reader #oneshot #drabble #i’m late

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drfoxweyman · 8 months

Text

State of personal affairs (IMPORTANT)

(TL;DR will be towards the bottom for those who don’t wanna read my ramblings, but I’d prefer you did since this is important.) Hey everyone, hope you’re all doing well, I’ll cut to the point by saying that I am not. For the past… We’ll say couple of months I’ve been on something of a mental health spiral, and it hasn’t really gotten any better save for my time at the Con. Which was a nice, but very brief reprieve. The whys of this dip in my well being are pretty varied, and some of it I’m not really able to talk about, whether for personal reasons or respect for others. But to put it broadly, work has been stressful, home has been stressful, my health has been stressful, everything has been stressful, and as it stands I don’t think I can keep up with things right now. So I’m taking a small break from working on commissions, and allowing myself a bit more breathing room when it comes to my streams (which is to say the next few streams may be much smaller scale, more chill chatting streams.)

Now before any of you who commissioned me recently panic: With my current comms I will still be updating you guys, just at a slower rate than normal, I don’t intend to leave you guys in the lurch. But if by the time I’m done with them I still feel this bad, I probably won’t reopen my queue like I’ve been doing nonstop for the past while now. At least if I can financially help it… Streams like I said are gonna be a bit more lax. I’ll probably finish Pinkie Tower, but after that? I dunno, chatting and maybe some light doodling. Dunno how this will affect Sinner’s Saturday since some kind of income would be nice, but this week we’re definitely doing something different, just have to figure out what. And yes, I still owe you guys that Discord movie night, we’ll be doing that soon. As for how long this time off is gonna be? No clue, it might only be a few days honestly, but the longest I’m giving myself is two weeks cause I just can’t afford any longer than that. And speaking of “affording”, it’s time for literally my least favourite part of the job. The shilling™️. I probably won’t really be making much if any money during this period, so if you ever wanted to support my work with a nice tip. Now would be the time. You have no idea how much even a small tip of a few dollars can help.https://ko-fi.com/foxweyman I’m not gonna sugar coat this folks. I make peanuts on my work. That’s no one’s fault, it's just the nature of being both a small artist and streamer, it’s something I’ve come to peace with as a fact of my career choices. But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t stress me out. Part of why I can never usually take breaks at all is because I literally can’t afford to.

I have rent to pay, phone bills, internet, electricity bills, hormone pills, pet expenses including; food, potential vet visits, toys, poo bags, cat litter, etc. I have to have money saved up incase of an emergency whether personal or work related (computer parts need replacing, tablet needs replacing etc), then there's house expenses; food, toilet paper, cleaning supplies; replacing anything we need etc. It’s a lot, even with our packed house.

The only reason I'm able to go to Furnal Equinox or Canfurence is because I start saving up money month after month after month as a treat to myself, and even when there I tend to bring my work so I can get my commission queue done faster and reopen them again as soon as the con is done.

I’ve been told to raise my prices but let’s be honest, I’m not at the level where I can charge hundreds upon hundreds of dollars for pieces, and while this may be a pessimistic view of my work, I probably won’t be able to any time soon. Same with stream goals, I don’t feel like there’s much I can offer right now that would be worth $500 goals or something.

I’d open a merch shop or something but that would be even more stressful upkeep, and again let’s be real. My reach isn’t big enough for that and you can only sell the same merch to the same customer base for so long.

I apologize if it seems like I’m ragging on about the money, but of all the things I’m dealing with it’s the easiest to talk about because it’s something I think at least a few of you can relate to. That and the more personal troubles cut a bit deeper and I’m not sure I even really wanna talk about them because I don’t like dragging you guys down with me. We’ve made an awesome little community and I don’t need to be hurting you with my problems. Is that the healthiest way of looking at it? No probably not but there it is.

Above all that though I just want some more time to myself and the people I care about, not fretting every second that “I could be working” or “I could be monetizing this”, instead of focusing on improving my mental health so I can be a better creator for you guys, and a better person for me. I wanna draw for myself again,even if it’s just low stakes doodles or barely cohesive comic pages, or hell even just to work on my poor draftwomanship .I wanna let myself play some games and not think “Oh I have to stream this”, every time I do. I wanna be able to go out with my loved ones and not constantly be thinking “WHY AM I NOT WORKING ON COMMISSIONS???”

So TL;DR taking a light break, not sure how long exactly, will keep current customers in the loop, streams aren’t going anywhere but may be a bit different, please tip to the ko-fi so I can stay afloat during this time https://ko-fi.com/foxweyman

For those that read through, thank you so much, it means the world that you care enough about my mental health to drudge through my ravings. You’re truly the best part of this job. A wonderful community that I can just chat and be honest with, I can laugh and joke with you all without fear or anxiety. That’s exceedingly rare these days and I couldn’t be more appreciative of you lot.

That in mind, this took awhile to write, my hands are hurting, and I wanna go lie down, maybe allow myself a good cry. Thanks everyone. <3

- Blaire,“Drfoxweyman”

#real life #irl #important #text psot #long #rambling #art #artist #streamer #support #kofi #ko fi support #mental health

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secretobsessionstuff · 2 years

Note

can you please do Kota and Blair for 18,43,78 on the “are you ok responses”?? maybe they get into an argument while blair isn’t feeling well so she leaves the room which prompts 18?

Thanks for the request!! The prompts come from THIS lovely post and I used:

18. "Like you care."

43. *can't answer over the urge to gag*

78. *humming no and cradling belly* "Mm-mm. M-My stomach..."

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Blair dropped her bag and coat onto the floor by the front door and made a beeline—ha Beeline—to the kitchen cabinet where they kept the medicine. She did not make that particular pun in her head, because her head was too sore to entertain any thoughts that weren’t about pain.

The ache had first wrapped itself around her forehead, but quickly spread so that it wrapped around her whole body. The muscles in her shoulders and back felt constricted with tension. Her stomach too was feeling the discomfort of an intense ache. As if enveloped in an unwanted hug, she found herself sticky and uncomfortable, unable to shrug off the annoying weight that settled into her bones.

She shook two pills into her hand and debated taking something for nausea. Blair never had much luck with anti-nausea pills; they never worked fast enough to stay down. The likelihood of the ibuprofen staying down wasn’t looking great either. The only reason she was chancing these pills was because she felt like she might stab the next person who spoke to her if she didn’t try something.

Unfortunately for Dakota, he greeted Blair in the kitchen, solidifying his role as The Next Person Who Spoke to Blair.

She did not stab him even though he came bouncing into the room, rambling about dinner. He made a Kotaline—you know, like Beeline—to the fridge. He opened the fridge so quickly that the jars and cans in the door clinked together annoyingly. Everything was annoying to Blair just then.

Dakota shoved a handful of grapes into his mouth. “Thank God you’re home. I’m starving and we have literally nothing to eat,” he said literally eating fruit out of his palm.

He spun around from the fridge and scanned the kitchen for something specific…something Blair was beginning to think she had forgotten. “Where’s the takeout? Did you get it?” He looked at her with exaggerated intensity. “Bee? Where’s our food?”

Ah yes, the food. The food that Blair was supposed to pick up after the work. The food that would single-handedly save Dakota from starvation. That food.

Blair didn’t want to look at him when she told him the bad news. What? With the way her stomach was aching, dinner was the last thing on her mind. She sat down on the kitchen stool with a sigh, burying her head in her hands. “I forgot it,” she mumbled, kneading her fingers into her forehead and eyes.

“No. You’re lying. You’re joking.”

“Fine. I’m lying. You’re right.”

“Really?” Dakota asked, perking up like a dog.

“No!” Blair slammed her hands on the kitchen counter. She didn’t mean to slam her hands, but they came down so heavily. Everything was so heavy. Her eyelids. Her stomach. The organ whined as if it had been stuffed with rocks. She blew a puff of air out of her nose, trying to remain composed. Dakota was just staring at her as if she maliciously flushed all their food down the toilet. She rubbed her hands together to get the tingling feeling to go away. “I’m sorry. I didn’t have a good day and I just wanted to get home.

“So, you purposely skipped getting dinner?”

“No. I really did forget it. I left work and my brain just drove me home. I wasn’t thinking.”

“Yeah, you weren’t thinking.” Dakota licked his lips and dragged his hand over his mouth. “I take it that means you didn’t pick up my prescription either?”

“What?”

“I asked you to pick up my meds on your way home.”

“When?” Blair had no memory of this.

“This morning before you left.” Dakota was starting to get antsy now, moving aimlessly around the kitchen. Blair knew he got stressed whenever he missed a day of his adhd meds.

There was so much she could say to this. Did Dakota even wait for a reply this morning or did he just assume that she would get his prescription? Did she give any indication that she heard him say this? The answer was no, obviously, considering that she hadn’t a clue what he was talking about.

And why did she have to do everything? She wasn’t the one sitting at home all day. He could have gone to the pharmacy. He could have gone grocery shopping. Hell, he could have done the dishes that were currently piled high in the sink.

But Blair didn’t say any of this. She was too tired to fight. Her belly was making enough fuss as it was. She placed her hand on her abdomen, feeling it cramp and churn. She didn’t want to do this right now. Dakota was still wandering around the kitchen, opening drawers and cabinets. When he said her name, she realized that he was expecting more.

“Can we talk about this later? I had a terrible day, and I don’t feel well.”

“What about dinner?”

This time Blair did want to slam her hands on the counter. He wasn’t listening to her at all, only caring about his own needs. A sudden hiccup made her shoulders jump. The sound was half hiccup, half groan. “I really don’t care! I’m not hungry” —so very very far from being hungry— “Just do what you want.”

“Oh okay, because you’re not hungry, everything is fine, then?” Dakota finally came to a stop, just long enough to glare at her.

That might have been the first instance where he saw something wasn’t quite right with the way she looked. Kinda pale. Kinda shaky. But in the midst of the argument, his mind didn’t connect the pieces just yet, despite everything she’d been saying. He was still thinking about how his day might look tomorrow if he didn’t take his meds. “And it wasn’t your prescription so who cares, right?”

God, Blair swore in her head, he was being so hypocritical right now. And sarcastic, and he kept putting words in her mouth. The last thing she wanted was anything in her mouth. But of course, he was feeding her words that she didn’t want, or think. Not only that, but she could feel bile rising in the back of her throat.

“Kota—hic—please.” She hiccupped again, this time it brought with it a burp that coated her tongue in a slimy layer of saliva. “I don’t want to fight right now.” She wasn’t sure how long they were going to argue like this, but she was certain that her stomach would not last long before sending up her lunch.

“Well, I don’t want to fight either but—” Dakota paused as she stood up from the stool and started to walk away. Honestly it was closer to a jog. As she passed him, she burped wetly into her hand. It did not sound good. Dakota grimaced at how sick that burp sounded. Now she was more than just kinda pale. More than kinda shaky. “Are—are you okay?”

She had to sneer at this. “Like you care.”

“Of course, I care,” Dakota said as he followed her down the hall. Damn she was moving fast now. Something was not right. “For real, babe, are you alright?”

Blair did not answer him. She was too busy gagging into her hand. Her belly lurched but she managed to keep the sick from spilling past her lips, at least until she made it to the bathroom.

She dropped to her knees in front of the toilet, letting out a gush of pale orange liquid. Hot vomit burned her throat before splashing into the water below.

“Oh.” Dakota stood frozen in the doorway. “Shit.”

More sick gurgled up her throat. She squeezed her eyes shut as the next heave rocked her forward. Her knuckles turned white from how hard she gripped the bowl. Each wave made tears leak onto her cheeks.

There was no chance to catch her breath in between bouts. It just kept coming. Her poor belly was spasming painfully, like a rag being wrung out to release the liquid trapped inside.

“Ugh God,” she mumbled as a harsh retch made her hair fall down by her face.

Dakota snapped out of his shock, perhaps realizing that he had soon-to-be husbandly duties, one of which was holding his soon-to-be wife’s hair back. He knelt beside her and gathered her hair up in his hand. With his free hand, he traced his fingers up and down her spine. “Okay, alright,” he muttered as he patted her back. “Get that shit up.”

She was shaking and burning up beneath his touch. He could feel the heat on the back of her neck from where he held her hair.

For a while longer, she stayed on her knees, too afraid to move from her spot.

Eventually, Blair let out a deep burp. It rumbled in her chest and made her shiver with a new spike of nausea. Another gag had her pitching forward. Nothing came up this time except for frothy saliva. She groaned and spat into the toilet.

She sighed heavily, wiped the sweat from her forehead, and leaned back against the wall. Her chest rose and fell rapidly. “Ugh, I feel horrible.”

Dakota settled into a better position as well, groaning as he pulled his feet out from under him to sit cross-legged. He took in the sight of her wan complexion “Oh Bee, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize you were so sick.” He wore a look of pure guilt and never took his hand off her thigh. “Are you okay?”

Blair made a low humming noise in her throat as if to say no and shook her miserably. “Mm-mm. M-My stomach...” She kept her eyes closed and her arms wrapped around her belly.

He felt like kicking himself. “I know. You’re really not feeling well at all.”

Blair cracked an eye open. “So, you did hear me say that.” It wasn’t really a question—more of a trap that Dakota was sure to fall into.

He stuttered. “I—I was being an asshole and I wasn’t listening to you.”

She shook her head at him. “That was the first right thing you said to me since I got home.”

“I feel like a jerk.”

“Oh, that’s because you’re a jerk.”

Dakota gave her a sad, puppy-dog look. “I’m really sorry, you know that right?”

“Maybe…”

“Mmh? Okay…” He moved closer to her and kissed her forehead. “Do you forgive me now?” He kissed her nose. “Or maybe now?” Finally, he picked up her hand and gave it the softest of kisses. “How about now?” he whispered.

Blair looked down in an attempt to conceal her smile, but Dakota lifted her chin back up. He wore the cheekiest grin.

“Ah I see that smile.” He kissed her nose again before backing up to give her space. “Ah you love me again,” he said in sing-song voice.

“I never stopped, idiot,” Blair said. Then she got serious for a second. “But you can’t just kiss me to make it all okay.”

“But I kissed you even though you’re covered in germs.” The look she gave him made him throw his hands up in surrender. “But you’re right. You’re right. I’ll pick up my own damn prescription right now and then go grocery shopping.”

“Thank you. But first…”

“Yes?”

“Help me to bed.”

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