#tell me exactly your thoughts. critique is welcome

[cargoshortsenjoyer]

This is Herbert West about to experiment on Jeffrey Combs. The concept originally came from @heliojip on here. He hasn't released his image yet though.

I had begun jokingly brainstorming how Jeffrey Combs would react if he was transported into the Reanimator universe and met Herbert. I think he'd escape with his knowledge of how horror movies work and how to act if you wanna be the survivor, and then go eat some keebler fudge magic middles (discontinued). Then Herbert would find him and Jeffrey would have to make up a reason why they look so similar, and he'd tell him that he was his REAL biological dad; the sperm donor to his actually adoptive father. Anyways if you want more of this headcanon tell me, it was fun

#herbert west #jeffrey combs #tell me if i should tag this in any specific way #reanimator #re-animator #tell me your ideas for how theyd interact too if you want #but a contingency in my mind is that jeffrey acts very normal. its a good contrast to herbert and a way to avoid making this weird #unless its already weird. write to me your thoughts! #i used 4 ref images to get this right. im glad i put in the effort #the surgical table doesnt fully follow the ref image but whatever. i still think it looks really good #i shouldve timed myself!! i usually do darn. #i am MOST proud of their faces/facial expressions/likenesses #herb still looks like herb even tho i exaggerated his mouth and nose #just a little but i also wanted to draw relatively realistically #its kinda fun #you have more lines to make a person look like themselves #and of course i love drawing weird perspectives #i also like the lines of the way i drew their hair. especially jeffrey's #dunno how to elaborate on that tho #tell me exactly your thoughts. critique is welcome

[ily-fictional-women]

Rumors

Summary: A Russian. A cold-blooded killer. An assassin. Or at least that’s what they say about the new recruit in SHIELD. And the worst part is, Y/n will have to work with her without knowing if these rumors are true.

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x fem!reader + platonic!Maria Hill x fem!reader

Warnings: None that I know of but if I should add anything let me know.

Word count: 3526

a/n: Y/n/l is for your last name since y'all voted for that one the most. Also this was supposed to a be a quick one shot but I kind of got carried away. (Reblogs are welcome and critiques/advice are heavily encouraged, but please no translating.)

Y/n lugs her duffle bag over her shoulder before jumping off the helicopter and feeling the adrenaline from her mission finally subside. Already going on autopilot to her bunk, she’s suddenly stopped. Y/n rubs her eyes, “Maria? What do you want? I’m trying to go to my bunk right now.” Maria holds out a file to Y/n, “Fury wants to talk mission prep with you.”

Taking the file reluctantly Y/n gives her a tight-lipped smile, “Thanks Maria.” As Y/n walked off towards Fury’s office she could hear the other woman holler, “And for the last time L/n, It's Hill. Agent Hill.” Y/n laughs out loud, “And last I checked Hill we’ve been friends way before SHIELD.”

Maria slowly follows Y/n with a grin, “Then as your friend, I should tell you that apparently you’re working with the new rookie everyone’s been talking about.” Y/n immediately stops mid-step, turning to face her friend. “Oh you’ve got to be kidding me,” Y/n groans. “I already don’t like working in teams, but a rookie who’s an emotionless assassin is crossing the line.”

Maria lets out a soft laugh at Y/n’s dramatics. “Just go talk to Fury, Y/n.” Y/n gives her a sarcastic shocked look, “Whoa whoa whoa now. I thought we were on a last-name basis, Agent Hill.”

“Stop stalling and just go Y/n/l.”

Y/n lets out a deep sigh, “Fine”

//

Finally making it to Fury's office Y/n knocks on the open door. “ Agent Y/n/l, good of you to finally join us.” Us? Y/n thinks to herself. Peering her head through the doorway she sees a woman with fiery red hair turn her head to look at her. “Agent Y/n/l stop standing around and sit your ass down.”

Sitting down, Fury clears his throat, “Before we talk about mission work we’ll talk about the elephant in the room. Agent Y/n/l, this is Agent Romanoff, you’ll be working with her on this mission. Now Y/n/l I’m sure you’ve heard plenty about Miss Romanoff, and I honestly don’t care. You two need to work that out yourselves.”

“But I don’t-” Fury cuts Y/n off. “Y/n/l, you’re doing this mission. You gotta learn to work with people.” Out of the corner of Y/n’s eye, she could see the redhead tense up slightly, grip tightening around the arms of her chair.

“Moving on, if you review your mission files you’ll see that your mission is taking place in an underground Hydra laboratory in the White River National Forest. Your goal is to take samples of a new super soldier serum Hydra is attempting to make. Then destroy the lab.”

“And what do we do with the rest of the samples and the laboratory?” This was the first time Y/n heard Romanoff’s voice, she’d heard rumors that Romanoff is Russian but the American accent caught her off guard. “You both will be given explosives with a personal detonator. The faster you get out of there the better. Are we clear on everything?”

Y/n closes her mission file getting up from her seat, “Crystal, sir.”

//

Hearing a quick knock, Y/n opens the door to her room with a yawn, “What do you want, I have a mission tomorrow can’t-” squinting her eyes she realizes it’s Maria. “I was going to ask how the meeting went, as your friend. But I feel like this is a bad time.”

With a huff and another yawn, Y/n pulls Maria into her room before flopping onto her bed. “She’s weird, Maria.” Maria sits next to her on the bed with an amused smile, “And how exactly is she weird?” Y/n throws up her arms dramatically, “She was just so quiet! It was off-putting.”

“That’s not really fair Y/n.” She sits up, “How is that not fair Maria?” Y/n could see a huge grin grow on Maria’s face and already knew what she was going to say. “Rember boot camp? Before SHIELD?” With a dramatic whine, Y/n quickly flopped back down on her back, “I knew it! I knew you were gonna bring this up.”

“It’s a valid thing to bring up, Y/n!” Maria tries to shake her arm to get her attention which results in a quick scowl. “Don’t look at me like that, you know I’m right. You didn’t talk a lot or have a lot of friends then. Now you have me and I can’t get you to shut up.”

“Ha ha Maria. But how is that supposed to help me?” Maria lets out a stressed sigh. “Do I really need to spell it out for you?” Y/n shrugs, “Yeah, please. I’m tired, and I have to wake up early tomorrow.”

“Just try not to treat her like everyone else does. Be nice to her.” Rubbing her face into her pillow, she closes her eyes and lets out a soft, “Okay.”

//

The loud rumble of the helicopter was muted by the headsets Y/n, Romanoff, and the pilot wore. Looking down at the view through her window Y/n could see small flakes start to quickly pile up on the trees below her. “Hey, are you sure it’s safe to fly in these conditions? It’s starting to snow pretty hard.”

The pilot presses on her own headset, “Shouldn’t become a problem as long as there’s no delays, Y/n/l.” With a quick sigh, Y/n presses on her comms headset again, “Copy that Agent May.” It takes another irritatingly quiet silence to land a safe distance from the Hydra base.

After everyone takes off their headsets one by one, Agent May pulls out a tablet with an overview of the base. Turning to face the two she gestures to the defenses of the base. “About half a mile from here is the south entrance, which is closest to the ramp leading to the lab you need to go to. The lab is the most heavily guarded part of the base, so be prepared for that.”

The two quickly nod, slinging the supplies in their duffle bags over their shoulders and trudging through the snow as the helicopter started to lift up into the sky again. Making their way to the entrance, two soldiers guarding the front immediately started firing at the two agents.

Reaching for her sidearm, Y/n manages to shoot one in the shoulder while matching Romanoff’s sprinting pace. On the other hand, Romanoff manages to hit the other guard with a blast from one of her wrist tasers, then sliding on one leg sweeping the guard off his feet. Examining one of the guards' bodies, Y/n pulls off their ID card.

Moving slower and quieter, the two make their way to the ramp leading to the lab– the entrance only being a large cement wall and a steel door with, as predicted, an ID scanner beside it. Y/n begins sliding the ID card but pauses, looking over to Romanoff. “Do you have anything besides those taser things?”

Romanoff pulls out her own sidearm and holsters it, "I’ll be fine Agent Y/n/l.” Sliding the card the rest of the way, the two agents are met with seven guards on the other side of the door. Three on each wall of the narrow hallway and one last extra burly soldier in front of the last door that leads to the laboratory.

One of the soldiers smirks, inching closer to the two and slowly raising his rifle. “Now who let you pretty ladies wander down here?” Immediately Romanoff taps something on her wrist, sending the man into a greater electric shock than the last. Romanoff looks down at him, “We let ourselves in.”

“We?” Y/n asks with a smile, following her lead shooting at the guards.

“That’s what I said,” Romanoff replies plainly as she picks up the rifle the soldier dropped, shooting at the other guards.

Now the only one left is the burly guard who started charging for Y/n. Trying to shoot at him, Y/n’s gun only makes a clicking noise. “I’m ou-'' Before Y/n can even finish her sentence Romanoff taps her wrist again, shooting the man which causes him to immediately fall to his knees and land flat on his face.

Finally taking a moment to breathe, Y/n feels a sharp pain in her shoulder, touching the most painful part and feeling blood. Romanoff looks at her with somewhat of a false calm look, “You okay to keep going?” Y/n nods painfully, “Yeah, yeah. The padding took most of the hit. Just a flesh wound.”

Giving Y/n a hesitant look for a moment she moves forward toward the lab, Y/n following suit. Opening the lab door the two are met with a mess of a lab and an obviously panicking scientist. She immediately breaks a glass beaker, lunging at Romanoff. “Y/n grab the vials!” is the last thing Y/n hears before Romanoff starts wrestling the other woman on the ground.

Searching the tables of the lab, there’s no visible sign of the Hydra super soldier serum. “Agent Romanoff, there’s nothing here.” Romanoff manages to straddle the scientist, slowly inching the broken beaker towards her. “Well then keep looking!”

“I will not have my work seized by some spy scum!” The scientist manages to flip Romanoff over, inching the broken glass closer to her chest. “Romanoff! Catch!” Y/n slides a large sharp piece of glass towards the other woman before getting back to looking for the serum.

With the new shard of glass, Romanoff manages to toss the other woman to the side, stabbing her. But in the process of doing so getting stabbed herself.

“Romanoff! I found some vials! We need to plant the bombs and go-” her voice goes quiet as she notices the wound- “right now. Shit.” Romanoff pulls the glass out of her side, putting pressure on her wound. She grits, “Plant the bombs first, worry about me after, Y/n/l.”

For a second she hesitates wanting to help her, but ultimately she listens to Romanoff’s instincts. Shoving the samples in her pocket, Y/n takes off her duffle bag and begins unloading the explosives. Four explosives, one for each corner of the lab– ensuring that everything is destroyed.

Lugging her bag over her shoulder, Y/n pulls Romanoff off the ground before swinging the agent’s arm over her uninjured shoulder. Hobbling out of the lab, Romanoff groans in pain, “Y’know you don’t need to do this. I can walk fine on my own.”

Y/n manages to let out a pained laugh, “Save your energy and stop complaining, Romanoff.”

Managing to get out of the laboratory is one thing, waiting for extraction will be another thing. Sliding against the cement wall, both Y/n and Romanoff sit down. Looking out in the distance Y/n noticed the snow, there was so much more of it compared to when they first landed.

Pulling out her phone, she called her last resort, Fury.

“Come on, pick up, pick up.”

“Miss Y/n/l, I was just about to call you.”

“Don’t Miss Y/n/l me Fury, where’s extraction?”

“As I was saying Agent Y/n/l, I was about to message you stating that because of an incoming blizzard, it isn’t safe to bring extraction to you. But there’s a SHIELD-owned cabin that Hydra doesn’t know about 2 miles West of your drop-off point. I suggest you start heading there.”

Not having the composure to reply to anything Fury said Y/n just hangs up on him. “Romanoff. Come on, we gotta start walking. Fury said there’s a place we can stay for a bit.” Y/n was met with no reply. Slapping the redhead’s cheek lightly a few times wakes her up. “Good, I can’t have you falling asleep on me Romanoff. Let’s go!”

“The bombs Y/n/l,” Romanoff nearly whispers. “What?” Y/n asks more focused on making it to the cabin. “The bombs,” Romanoff says louder one more time. “Shit, you’re right.” Y/n immediately comes to a stop, nearly causing Romanoff to trip. But with the bomb being set off they needed to move fast.

//

“In SHIELD training there’s similar exercises to walking long distances with partners. What they don’t account for is the snow, injuries, and trees! So many damn trees. I don’t know why I’m rambling, you've probably gone through SHIELD academy.”

Romanoff hisses in pain, “I haven’t, and you can stop complaining about the trees-we’re here.” The outside of the cabin looks practically abandoned, with the paint peeling and wood rotting. When touching the rusted handle though, an automated voice appeared. “Access granted. Welcome Y/n Y/n/l.”

Unlike the outside of the cabin, the inside looked nice. It wasn’t luxurious looking but it worked. And most importantly, there was a fireplace. Easing Romanoff onto a nearby chair gave Y/n a moment to look through the drawers of the cabin. “Matches! Finally.”

Flicking a lit match into the pre-placed pile of wood in the fireplace, Y/n starts rummaging through her duffle bag, grabbing a first aid kit and kneeling in front of the other woman. “Okay, Romanoff this is gonna sound super weird but I’m gonna need you to unzip your jumpsuit.”

“I- It’s too cold.” Y/n stands up, wrapping one of Romanoff’s arms over her shoulder once more. “We are going to sit on the floor in front of the fireplace then, because I can’t have you dying on me here.”

Y/n eased Romanoff on the floor, quickly sitting in front of her looking for the right supplies. “Your shoulder.”

“What about my shoulder Romanoff?”

“You’re bleeding through your jacket Y/n/l.” Y/n shrug,s finally pulling out the right supplies from the first aid kit. “I told you already. I’m fine.” Y/n flashes a quick smile, “Now you need to unzip that jumpsuit so you can stop bleeding. Please.”

With a painful groan, she unzips the jumpsuit, revealing a black sports bra and a nasty wound not so far below it before tying the upper part of her jumpsuit to her waist. “Okay, you shouldn’t need that many stitches. Can you lean back a bit?”

Leaning back, Romanoff could already feel the sharp sting of alcohol. She was in pain, but trying to hide it. “You wanna talk?” Y/n asked, managing to keep her focus on cleaning the wound. “What do you mean talk?” Y/n shrugs, not breaking her focus, “Anything,” she glances up at the redhead. “It usually helps me forget about what’s happening.”

Romanoff lets out a dry chuckle, “I don’t think I’m in a talking mood.”

“What if I ask questions and you just answer them? It’s less effort,” Y/n grins. “And it’s the least you could do for me after I dragged you for two miles in a snowy forest.”

“I told you I could walk fine on my own.”

“Yet you didn’t bother to stop me once on the way here.” Romanoff lets out a deep annoyed sigh, “Fine. Only five questions though.” Y/n glances up at her one more time with a subtle smile, “Deal. First question, what’s your name? In situations like these, I usually like to be on a first-name basis.”

“It’s Natasha, Romanoff.” Y/n pauses immediately, before tossing a cotton ball to the side with a playful smile plastered across her face. “Can I call you Nat then?” Natasha cracks a genuine half smile with Y/n’s being too infectious. “We’ll see, but that does count as one of your questions.”

“All right, all right, fine.” Y/n continues cleaning the wound. “So, third question, your accent, is it real?”

“No, but I’m sure it’ll become real over time.” Starting the first stitch Natasha winces, but Y/n just keeps talking. “So if you fake your accent, is that why you don’t talk a lot? So you don’t slip up.”

“I’m not afraid of slipping up. I think it makes things less complicated. Less questions are asked, usually.” Y/n slips out a loud sarcastic laugh finishing the second stitch. “Wow! I think you just made a joke!” Natasha smiles to herself, “I think I did. But you’re on to your last question.”

“Okay, why did you join SHIELD?” Y/n can see Natasha bite the inside of her cheek, regretting the question. “You don’t have to answer or anything I can-” Natasha stops her, “No, no it’s fine. Um, long story short I was part of the red room. Then I met a guy who gave me an opportunity to clear some red from my ledger and take down the red room. So I took it.”

“Have you thought of reclaiming the title Black Widow then? Maybe clear the red of the title itself, make it something good?” Natasha gives Y/n a mock shocked look, “I thought you agreed to just five questions?” Y/n shrugs with a smug grin, “I mean I finished up when you were talking about clearing your ledger. I figured I might be able to sneak one more in.”

“How about this, you take that jacket off and let me look at your shoulder that’s ‘just fine,’ then I might answer it.” Y/n collects all the bloody materials used to clean up Natasha’s wound, throwing them away. “And I told you it was just a flesh wound, Nat. I’m okay.”

“And flesh wounds still should be disinfected Y/n, sit down.” With a loud reluctant sigh, Y/n sits in front of her, unzipping her jacket and exposing the bloody shoulder with a small hole made by the bullet. After leaning back a little, Natasha Immediately starts cleaning the surrounding area of the bullet wound.

“What about you?” Natasha asks as she continues cleaning the wound. “What about me?” Instead of avoiding eye contact this time, Y/n keeps her eyes on Natasha. “Why did you join SHIELD?” Y/n smiles, “No, nope. You didn’t answer my question first.”

“Fine, I’ve thought of it. Now what about-” Natasha quickly pulls out the bullet in Y/n with tweezers, “you.” Y/n yelps in pain pressing a hand against her shoulder for a moment before letting Natasha get back to work. “Okay, next time give me a warning.” Natasha grins to herself, “You should hope there isn’t a next time.”

“You knew what I meant. Anyways, when it comes to your question I joined SHIELD because my best friend did. Before SHIELD her and I, Maria, we served as Marines together. But Fury realized could do more, be more if we joined SHIELD. And she saved me enough times back then for me to trust her.”

“Do you trust me?”

“Considering you are finishing patching up the shoulder I got shot in, I'd say yes. Not with my life though, yet.”

“Do you plan to trust me with your life?”

“I don’t see why not. Having just one person to trust like that is limiting.”

“Trusting me like that is dangerous though.”

“Sometimes you need to live life a little dangerously.”

//

“That was a good debrief Romanoff, although I think you could have left out the part about me complaining about the trees.” Natasha grins, “Maybe don’t complain about trees the next time we’re in a forest then Y/n/l.”

As Natasha starts to walk off to her bunk Y/n stops her, “Nat, wait.” Natasha has a faint smile visible on her lip. “Did you need something Y/n?”

“Not really, I was just wondering if you wanted to maybe train together sometime. You could even teach me that leg sweep move you did.” Natasha crosses her arms looking Y/n up and down for a second. “Yeah, we could do that. Just prepare to fall a lot.”

“Am I interrupting something?” Both women jump a little, Y/n specifically turning around to see who it is. “Oh! Maria! Ehm um, I mean Agent Hill. Did you need something?” Natasha starts backing away, “I think I’ll leave you two to whatever is going on.”

“Okay, I’ll talk more about that move tonight?” Natasha smiles, “Yeah. That works.” As Natasha walks out of earshot Maria immediately starts giggling. "I told you to be nice to her Y/n/l, but not that nice." Y/n looks at Maria with a slight blush coming onto her face. "Wait, what do you mean by that?"

Maria shrugs with a suggestive smile on her face, "Y'know what forget that, how'd the mission go." Y/n smiles bashfully, "Uh it was good, it went really well actually."

"You like her don't you?"

"W-what no. It's not like that." Maria smiles knowingly, "Oh it totally is like that." Y/n slaps Maria’s arm in embarrassment, "Shut up."

"For what it's worth," Maria glances over Y/n's shoulder, "it looks like she likes you too."

#natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff x female #natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanoff fanfic #natasha romanov #natasha x reader #maria hill x reader #maria hill #nick fury #marvel fancic #marvel imagine

[yuri-is-online]

Hello!

Congratulations on getting 300 followers! Feel free to ignore this request if you'd like, but can you do prompt #7 with Jamil, Ace, and Trey?

7. Wearing a maid outfit during a culture fair

Thank you <3 And there is no way I am ignoring this one when you picked maybe the best possible line up for it.

notes: they/them pronouns used for Yuu, mild cringe, a bit... suggestive and light spoilers for the white rabbit event in Trey's part (i.e. Yuu references the event costumes) Check out the rest of the event requests here.

Jamil

"Welcome back master!" You cheerfully give the greeting Ortho had helped you practice and immediately wish for death as soon as you see just who the customer you gave it to is. Jamil stares at you, really stares at you, eyes shot wide cognitive thought completely evaporated from his brain.

"Do- have you-" He coughs, fighting off the urge to hide in his hood. "Have you been greeting everyone like that?"

"Um yes, Ortho said it was the appropriate way to greet customers at a maid cafe." Not that this was a maid cafe exactly, it was a booth handing out bottled water to attendees of the NRC culture fair the school nurse had insisted on setting up. You were supposed to be wearing a dorm uniform to really sell that school pride, but Ramshackle doesn't have one so you had jokingly offered to wear a maid outfit, something Ortho apparently decided was brilliant and convinced Vil to let you borrow one from the film club. You weren't sure why you agreed to this but hey, at least it was cute. Jamil certainly doesn't seem to disagree.

"Well you should stop, it's extremely undignified." That's what he says, but it's missing the usual edge his critiques usually have. If you didn't know any better, you would think that he's embarrassed, which gives you a brilliant idea.

"Maaaaaster," you make sure to whine out the title with a big pout as you move directly into his personal space keeping just enough distance between you two to be tempting, delighting in how his throat twitches at the title "I'm working really hard to make you happy y'know? It's really rude to say that's 'undignified.'" You stay like that for a brief moment, gears in Jamil's mind whirring so fast they might as well be letting off steam. Finally, the breath he's been trying to catch finally goes down taking him with it.

"JAMIL!" He huffs at your concern from his new home on the pavement in annoyance.

"Seriously, it's rude to tease."

Ace

"Oh come on what even is the point of this?" In today's episode of Night Raven Comedy, Ace is shouting in disappointment at his reflection in Yuu's bedroom mirror while they and Deuce stand hands folded in disappointment just behind him.

"Really I don't get why you are so surprised." Says Deuce. 'Wasn't this entire thing your idea?"

"What's that got to do with it?" He snaps, face softening slightly when he looks at you but returning to annoyance when Deuce starts to smirk at him. "Don't tell me you're actually excited about dressing like this?" Deuce shrugs.

"I mean don't get me wrong it is embarrassing, but honestly seeing you dressed up like this makes it worth it." The grin on Deuce's face is outright evil, and you silently sigh, searching around your room for Grim's ribbon. About a month ago, Crewel had announced that your class would need to put together a booth for the school culture fair and asked for suggestions. Someone had complained it would be useless to try and compete with the other classes without a gimmick and Ace, for some reason, had suggested maid outfits. You weren't sure what surprised you more, that suggestion or that everyone had agreed with it.

"Why did you suggest a maid cafe if you didn't want to dress up like a maid?" You ask, already annoyed and adding ibuprofen to your mental list of things to make sure to bring with you when the three of you are finally ready to leave. He mutters an answer and you sigh. "Speak up I can't hear you."

"Yeah Ace," laughs Deuce, dodging a pillow Ace throws at his head "why did you suggest it?"

"Because I wanted to see you dressed like one." He mutters, pouting while Deuce laughs before turning on you. "And don't act like you didn't go along with it! Why did you vote for it?"

"Because I wanted to see you in a maid outfit too."

Oh, judging by the judgment Deuce is passing on both of you and Ace's shock you said that out loud, didn't you...

Trey

Breathe in breathe out. Busy your hands by adjusting your glasses and fix your smile in place and take another deep breath before you speak and focus on the eyes.

"That's an interesting outfit you have on Prefect." Trey says, and you sigh in relief. Finally someone normal.

"Thanks! I was worried it would be a bit too much." Realistically speaking you know it is, seriously maid outfits are already cute enough, adding bunny ears, ribbons, and a frilly tail just makes it lethal. Cater almost made you late with how many pictures he insisted on taking before you managed to escape.

"Well I don't know about that, it's certainly extremely cute though." Trey crosses his arms and tries to avoid gripping his bicep too hard. The way you light up at his praise doesn't help. "Where did you get it if you don't mind me asking?"

"Oh Deuce's mom gave it to me when we visited Clock Town." Your nod causes the bunny ears to bounce and someone takes in a sharp breath. "Riddle said it would be helpful if Deuce could wear his costume for your booth about the Queen of Hearts, but he didn't want to dress up alone so I volunteered to help."

"Is Deuce wearing a... similar costume?" It could be just you, but Trey sounds like he's feeling a bit sick.

"Well kind of? He isn't a maid bunny. But speaking of Deuce I should really get back! Wouldn't want Riddle to get angry." You are clearly waiting for him to say something, but Trey doesn't trust himself to speak. "Trey?" You reach up towards his forehead forcing him to get a really good look at the entire costume as you try checking his temperature and frown in distress. "Oh you're practically burning up, let me walk you to the hospital wing I don't think Riddle will mind if-"

"You should be a bit more careful." Trey catches your hand as you go to take it away from his forehead, keeping you close to him yellow eyes daring you to step in just a bit further. "You aren't from around here, but surely even you know how deep a rabbit hole can go, right Prefect?"

#twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #jamil viper x reader #ace trappola x reader #trey clover x reader #300 followers celebration #yes i was listening to fukashigi no carte while writing this #trey does not dream of bunny yuu kohai #coming to theaters near you never

[heliads]

Hello to one of the loveliest people in the universe! Ehe, I’m back, and I was wondering if you could a tasm Peter Parker x reader, except this, takes place after NWH, and like, the reader’s actually spiderwoman in her universe, and she also lost her Peter (who’s basically her universe’s task Peter)? And like they’re very wary of each other at first, but then they realize they’re not threats, and eventually have some fun banter and conversation before Peter says something like “you remind me of someone” and she replies with the same? And like, they realize reader doesn’t really have a place to go, so they go to Peter’s apartment, but she’s starting to hyperventilate because this is *exactly* where her Peter used to live, and so Peter has to remove her mask, and he’s just so shocked and they basically hold each other? Ehe yes torture me with angst please -

ok ily but i have not seen nwh whoops so idk if this makes any sense but i loved the vibe of this req so i simply had to do it

masterlist

The grave is not welcoming as of late, but then again cold stone never is. Your tears don’t quite dry, but then again they never do. You should be used to this now, you think, or at least have found a way to get a better hold of yourself before now, but even after all of this time, one look at Peter Parker’s headstone is all it takes for you to break.

It wasn’t fair, how he died. It wasn’t right. Peter Parker, your wonderful Peter, the one who would walk miles with you to your car just to make sure you would get home safely, the very boy who would watch science fiction movies with you just to critique their realism, should have lived a very long and very thrilling life. He deserved awards, praise, hundreds of friends just as devoted to him as you are.

You’re certain that he did, or at least that all of that came posthumously. You know the funeral service was packed full of people who wanted to talk about him, but all you could think about was that they never managed it while he was alive. Then again, perhaps your ire was misdirected in the hopes of sparing you some of the burn. After all, you’re the reason Peter is dead, aren’t you?

In the end, you didn’t save him when he needed it the most, and that’s on you. As the resident Spider-Woman, it’s your job to take care of those in need, to protect the city and take down threats before they can grow into problems. You’ve managed it for years, but when it came down to it, you couldn’t save your boyfriend.

Distantly, you wonder if he can see you now, if he blames you for what happened half as much as you blame yourself. The fight that day should have been an easy one, just another run of the mill bad guy with some freak twist that decided to make your life difficult yet again.

The problems started when the resident bad guy started showing off his latest inhuman abilities, then Peter stumbled into the thick of things. He shouldn’t have been there, he was supposed to be across town at a conference, but one minute you were ducking for cover in an attempt to reload your web shooters and the next moment you had a picture perfect few of a New York villain bearing down on your boyfriend.

You remember that day vividly, as if you saw it on a movie theater-type big screen instead of with your own eyes. You can still feel the pull of your muscles as you threw yourself across the alleyway just in time to push Peter out of the way. You grabbed him and swung to a nearby alley, and once you were out of imminent danger you were shouting at him about what the hell he was doing there.

Peter had a snappy answer, he always did, but you could tell he was stunned by what had just happened. It was a very close call, and you thought it would be the closest he would get. The issue was that you were distracted with figuring out just why Peter was there instead of how to get him out of there. You were looking him, and you had the perfect view of his face as Peter got hit by an energy blast from the same guy you were supposed to be fighting.

The inhuman had aimed at you, but missed just perfectly and the blast ricocheted into Peter as well. You could feel the heat of the blast just under your arm, but Peter caught it straight in the chest. You watched the light fade from his eyes in one breath. One breath and he was gone, and you were more alone than you had ever been in your entire life.

It destroyed you. That was months ago, and you’re still some fragile wreck who can’t see a happy couple without being swamped by her own devastation. You took down the inhuman that killed Peter, but that doesn’t make you feel any better. The only person left to blame is yourself, and you’ve certainly got enough run time on that self loathing to make it last a lifetime.

One thing and one thing alone can possibly start to make the guilt less severe, and that’s your time as Spider-Woman. You were already fairly active on your nightly patrols, but ever since Peter died, it’s become your life. You go out in your suit morning and night, hour after hour. Your boss complained that you were taking too much time off, so you went out even more and started fudging your times in the logbook. Your family wants to see you more often, you make up excuses. Nothing matters like this does.

It’s not a healthy habit, and you know that, but what can you do? You are nothing without Peter. You needed him in every sense of the way, and you failed him. At least now you can stop people from losing their Peters. At least now no one else has to feel as crushed as you do.

You spend one last moment kneeling at Peter’s grave, then gently run a hand over his name and stand up, tugging your mask back over your head. It’s time for another nightly patrol. Already, the sun is sinking beneath the horizon, which means that you need to be ready to fight until your last breath. Maybe you’ll be lucky enough that you’ll get that end tonight.

You find your next fight within a matter of minutes. There’s yet another robbery happening down yet another street, and it feels like proof that nothing ever gets better in this city. No matter how many hours you spend stopping hijackings like this one, there’s always more. 

Still, you have a part to play, and you play it as well as you always do. You’re operating on pure muscle memory by the time you swing into the alleyway, and your words when you ask the robbers to stop and put their hands in the air are a prepared speech. They don’t listen, of course, but then again, that’s kind of what you wanted. You’ve been itching for a fight for a while now. You feel it all the time. 

You’re expecting the robbers to run further into the alleyways, but they surprise you and instead start climbing a nearby fire escape to the surrounding roofs. An interesting technique, but not one that will save them in the long run. You just swing up after them, landing on your feet and starting to run the second the soles of your boots touch a solid surface.

After that, your body goes on autopilot. There are four robbers currently running away from you; you take the nearest man down within moments, shooting a web that anchors his ankle to the ground. He stumbles and falls hard. You leap neatly over his body to continue pursuing the others. The second closest suffers from the same fate, easy.

The other two have caught on to what you’re doing and stop running, angling their guns towards you. The weapons appear to be energy based of some sort, and hum and glow like engines. One of them fires at you and you duck just in time, watching as the projectile burns a hole in the brick behind you. Once upon a time, you would have used that as an opportunity for a snappy comeback, but you’ve long since started keeping your mouth shut. There’s nothing funny about what you do anymore, not after you failed when it mattered the most.

Instead, you fire two webs at each of the men, and, crossing your arms suddenly, force the two robbers to slam into each other. They stumble to the ground, dazed, and you pace towards the one on the left. You throw him against a nearby wall, using your webs to bind him to the brick surface.

You took your eyes off of the other robber for too long, though, and judging by the energy projectile that barely misses you, he’s got his hands back on his gun. You whip around and start to fire a web at him, but you can tell that it’s too late. Is this how it ends, after all this time? A dark night, a lonely roofline, one reflex coming a little too slowly? At least you’ll see Peter again when it all falls apart. You wonder if he’ll hate you when it’s the two of you in the land of the dead, or if he’s done what you couldn’t and forgiven you.

The killing blow doesn’t come, though. A net of spider web shoots out of nowhere, tackling the guy to the ground. The web wasn’t yours, though, your fingers are still reaching for your web shooter. There’s someone else here, then, someone who’s got a similar setup as you.

You scan the horizon frantically, and see the guy on your second pass. He’s dressed in a suit that’s eerily similar to yours, blue and red with a black spider emblem across his chest. Even the black-edged ovals for his eyes look like the ones you’re staring out of right now. You stalk towards him like a caged animal, one arm raising by your side to point at him.

“Who are you? Why are you imitating me?”

The other guy rubs a hand over his masked face as if tired. “Shoot. I’m in the wrong universe, aren’t I? They dropped me off in the wrong place.”

You cock your head to the side. “Sorry, I’m not sure I’m following. What are you talking about?”

The guy spreads his hands, fumbling for a reason. “I’m not from here.”

You nod slowly. “Yeah, I can see that. Still doesn’t explain why you’re dressed like me, though.”

The man chuckles. “If you think about it, you’re the one dressed like me. Listen, have you ever heard of the multiverse theory?”

At your hesitant nod, he continues speaking in a rush. “Good. Great. See, I was pulled out of my universe to help with a problem, but I think I ended up in the wrong spot. You must be the Spider-Man here, right? Same way I’m the Spider-Man in my place.”

You cross your arms over your chest, still not entirely inclined to believe him. “Yeah, I’m Spider-Woman. How are you getting back to your universe, then?”

Spider-Man’s mask twitches over what you can only assume is a grimace. “Wonderful question. I have no idea. Do you happen to be in contact with any multiversal experts? I don’t know, you got any wizards around?”

You widen your eyes slowly. “Wizards? Out of curiosity, are you supposed to be freaking me out more or less? I need to be sure so I can tell you how bad of a job you’re doing.”

The guy laughs. “Okay, you’ve got me there. Let me start over. My name is Spider-Man, I’m from New York, and although I don’t really know how I’m getting home, this place seems nice enough that I might be sticking around. Are you alright with that?”

You consider that. “I don’t know. Don’t you miss your home? Don’t you want to go back?”

Spider-Man lets out a desolate sigh, the kind you’ve only heard from your lungs. “I’ve lost enough people that it doesn’t feel like home anymore. At least here I get a fresh start.”

You nod at last. “I can understand that. Once you lose the right people, nothing feels like it’s worth it anymore.”

He points at you in agreement. “You get it, then. You’ve lost some people.”

You force a smile even though he can’t see it. “My boyfriend. I should have saved him, and I didn’t. Who’d you lose?”

Spider-Man’s hands twitch at his sides, as if reaching for someone he can’t ever touch again. “My girlfriend, my parents, my uncle. Feels like there’s no end to it. To be honest, I’m kind of wondering if they’d be alive here, if this universe’s version of me didn’t become Spider-Man. Maybe I’d even get to see my best friend again.”

You hope for his sake that he manages it. “I guess it all changes based on what we did. It’s funny that there are multiple Spider-People, though. Maybe no matter what, people feel like they need to do something.”

Spider-Man hums in agreement. “That’s what I was thinking about, too. We all chose this path. Why?”

You lift a shoulder. “I don’t know. Guilt, maybe. With great power comes great responsibility.”

You smile sadly to yourself at the quote. Peter had said that to you around the time he first found out you were Spider-Woman, and it helped ease some of the stress surrounding your alternate line of work. At least your boyfriend supported you in it, although look where that got him.

Spider-Man, however, reacts strongly to your words, a quiet gasp emanating from his lungs. “You say it too, huh? ‘With great power comes great responsibility?’ I was wondering if you would. A couple other Spider-guys I knew did the same thing, I think we all hear it from somebody important, someone we don’t think we can live without until–”

He cuts himself off hastily, as of swallowing back some unspoken tide of regret. “Anyway, it’s important. My Uncle Ben said it.”

Your smile fades as you remember the day you first heard it. “My boyfriend was the one to come up with it. Guess that matches the pattern.”

You glance away, and Spider-Man must be able to tell that the conversation is steering into troubled waters, because he quickly guides the topic back to something more palatable.

“It’s cool that there are all these connections, though. More than I expected.” He says.

You nod absentmindedly. “Yeah, I’m kind of curious about that, actually, how many things are similar between your life and mine. I got my powers because I was wandering around Oscorp. My best friend, the guy who ended up being my boyfriend, was wandering around and I was trying to catch up to him. He went right, I went left, and I ended up in–”

Spider-Man cuts you off excitedly. “A room full of spiders? Oh my God, I did the exact same thing. Talk about creepy. I know there was a scientific reason, but why was that room there? And why was it so easy to find?”

You shudder. “Tell me about it. Literally the worst experience of my life. I mean, having powers is cool, but so many spiders.”

Spider-Man laughs, and you swear you’ve heard it before, just out of reach to name. “I’m glad somebody else went through that. Nobody wants me to complain about that part, although I feel like I should. Disgusting. It’s interesting that your friend was there, though. Mine was too.”

You tilt your head to the side, thinking. “Interesting. It’s cool to think about all the different universes that could have been created had everyone made slightly different choices. How many universes are there, anyway? Millions? Billions?”

Spider-Man shrugs. “Infinities, maybe, and then more. There is no end to what the multiverse decides to create. Even if I can’t make it back to mine, I like your universe.”

He glances up at the sky, as if noticing the dark sky for the first time. “It’s getting late. We should probably go our separate ways.”

He turns to leave, but you stay on the roof. You don’t really have a place to go. As it turns out, being Spider-Woman full time is not great for paying rent. You’ve been crashing at a friend’s place for a while now, although you had to leave today because you could tell her patience was wearing thin. You were supposed to book a hotel room today until you could find another place, but you never got around to it.

Spider-Man doesn’t ask about that, thankfully, but he does turn back to you. “Actually, I wouldn’t mind catching up with another Spider-Person. Come back to my place?”

You smile under your mask, jogging to catch up with him. “You got an apartment so quickly? I thought you just arrived in this universe.”

Spider-Man nods. “No, I was surprised too. I got the exact same place I had in my universe, which was weird. The landlord looked confused, said something about how he thought I was leaving, but he let me rent the rooms again. Who knows, maybe the version of me in this universe just moved out.”

You shrug. “Well, I’m glad you got your place. Anything for some sort of normalcy, right?”

Spider-Man shudders. “Tell me about it. Here, follow me, it’s actually pretty close by.”

He leaps off the roof with a delicate movement, as if to him flying and falling were one and the same. He catches himself with a rope of spider web shot to a nearby building, and you follow him, both of you swinging in tandem to the beats of the city. Spider-Man directs you through turn after turn, eventually coming up on a window of a familiar apartment building.

You wait for him to unlatch the window, both of you perched on the fire escape. You look around while Spider-Man fiddles with the lock, and your heart freezes in your chest. You know this exact view, you spent so long looking out this particular window with someone very close to you.

Indeed, when Spider-Man finally gets the window open you all but throw yourself over the ledge. No, it’s true. This is the exact place. This is Peter Parker’s exact place. You swear you feel your breathing speed up to double time, and your head feels as light as a cloud.

A hand descends on your shoulder, steadying you. When you look up, Spider-Man’s regarding you with the best concerned expression he can manage through the mask. 

“Hey, is everything alright?” He asks, albeit somewhat pointlessly. You’re obviously not alright in the slightest, but you still find yourself nodding anyway.

“I think so. It’s just– well, this is my boyfriend’s old place. I haven’t been here since he died, and I didn’t expect to be back so soon. This is the same building, the same floor, even. This is where he lived, and–”

And where he stopped living, once you couldn’t save him. This is the empty apartment you had to clean out, where you had to load bags full of stuff into a taxi and take it to his aunt’s home. This is where you had to tell the landlord that he had to cancel the rent, although you were so overcome that you couldn’t even bear to tell the guy that Peter had died, only managed something about how he was moving really quickly.

The landlord. The landlord, which Spider-Man just said seemed surprised to rent the place out again. That couldn’t be, though, because the only reason the landlord would be surprised would be if Peter was back, and–

Spider-Man appears to have reached the same conclusion as you. “Wait, what was the name of your boyfriend? I need to know. What was his name?”

His voice is desperate, just as desperate as yours must be as well. The words come out in a choked gasp:

“Peter Parker.”

Spider-Man rears back as if you’ve slapped him. Then he’s shaking his head furiously. “Who are you? You said you were my friend. Who are you?”

You can’t manage another syllable, so you reach up to tug off your mask. Your hands are shaking too badly, though, and all you can do is scratch at the fabric. He gets what you’re trying to do, though, and takes it off for you. His gasp echoes around the apartment, eddying up ghosts that should have long stayed dead.

“Y/N?”

You know it from the way he says your name, even though it’s no longer tainted with all the memories you’ve made. No one else has ever said those letters in that exact same way, no one except the boy you’ve loved with all of your heart and buried in the cemetery three blocks away.

“Peter?”

He nods, swallowing hard as he pulls off his own mask. The tears start the second you see his face. It’s him. It’s Peter. He’s still the same after all of this, still the boy you love. His hair curls in the same patterns, shines the same way under these familiar lights. You have seen him a thousand times in this exact room, maybe a million, but never like this.

His hand drifts forward unconsciously to wipe the tears from your face. “I can’t believe it. In this universe, you’re the one who had to deal with all this.”

You laugh even as the tears fall harder. “And in my universe, you’re dead, Peter. I didn’t save you. You needed me, and I couldn’t do it.”

Peter shakes his head. “That’s not true.”

You turn away. “How could you possibly know that?”

Peter’s crossing the room hurriedly so you’re forced to look at him. “Because I know you, Y/N, and I know that you’d never give up on a person if you thought you could help them. I know that even in a universe where you’re not Spider-Woman. I know it because I know you.”

You shake your head slowly. “You don’t even love me in your universe.”

It’s a cruel thing to say, especially to this boy who has only ever tried to help you. After all this time, though, you’re still so selfish over him that you’d never want him to be anyone else’s but yours.

Peter, however, just smiles. “I always wanted it to be you. In my universe, when Gwen died, I couldn’t bring myself to love anyone else, no matter how much I wished I could love you. I’m glad that your version of me could do it. At least one of me could do it.”

You reach out a trembling arm and Peter folds you into him. The two of you fit together just as easily as always, even without the memories or the years that shaped you. How long have you needed Peter? Just as long as he’s needed you, perhaps.

When you manage to look up from where you’ve tucked your head under his chin, you notice that Peter’s gazing gently at you, too. Neither of you are able to voice the words aloud, but you know exactly what he’s thinking. It’s what you’re thinking, too: let’s give this another chance, for all of us. For the Peter you lost and the Y/N that he left behind. For all of the memories that have been split between the two of you. At last, you get the do over you’ve wanted for so long.

marvel tag list: @namoreno, @thatfangirl42, @rogueanschel, @mycosmicparadise, @ellobruv, @caswinchester2000, @with-inked-solace, @sher-lokid7, @amortensie, @23victoria, @watchreadfangirlrepeat, @gods-fools-heroes

#peter parker #peter parker imagines #peter parker x reader #peter parker oneshot #spiderman #spiderman imagines #spiderman x reader #spiderman oneshot #tasm #tasm imagines #tasm x reader #tasm oneshot #marvel #marvel imagines #marvel x reader #marvel oneshot #andrew garfield spiderman #andrew garfield spiderman imagines #andrew garfield spiderman x reader #andrew garfield spiderman oneshot

[666writingcafe]

Welcome Back

If it weren't for the fact that Luke was with us, I would have cursed loudly. You see, when the four of us went through the gate that would take us to the Devildom, I winded up landing hard on my butt.

"Sorry about that, MC," Solomon states as he helps me up. "I really should've warned you to be careful where you land."

"We didn't have this issue in the Celestial Realm," I tell him.

"That's because Solomon's magic is, shall we say, more chaotic than mine," Simeon replies. "Thankfully, it shouldn't have interfered with where we landed."

"Which is where, exactly?" Luke asks rather impatiently. Simeon gently takes Luke's hand and starts walking forward, leaving Solomon and I with no choice but to follow. Our walk doesn't take long, and soon we're looking at the back of one of the RAD buildings. Solomon takes out his D.D.D., and I'm close enough to see that he's texting Barbatos about our arrival. Seconds after he hits send, the demon butler literally appears out of thin air.

"Dah!" Luke shouts, latching onto me. "Don't do that, Barbatos!"

"I apologize, Luke. It was the quickest way I could get to you." Barbatos briefly glances at each of us, as if doing a mental headcount. "I'm glad everyone arrived safely."

"I wish I wasn't here," Luke grumbles. Faintly smiling, Barbatos reaches into his pocket and pulls out a key, which he hands to Simeon.

"That is for Purgatory Hall," he explains. "It is best if the two of you get settled in."

"What about Solomon?" Luke asks.

"There are some things that I need to discuss with him and MC before I send him over. Everything has been prepared for your stay." Before Luke can question Barbatos any more, Simeon calmly leads him away, and soon it's just me, Solomon, and Barbatos.

"If you will follow me," Barbatos instructs. The three of us walk silently inside the nearest RAD building. We end up walking past the student council room, where there appears to be a meeting in session. I manage to catch Diavolo mention something about a witches' sabbath before Barbatos quickly ushers Solomon and me into an office. Closing the door behind him, he gestures us towards a office desk. Solomon and I sit on one side, and Barbatos sits on the other.

"First things first: MC, may I have your notebooks, please?" Barbatos asks. Unzipping my backpack, I pull them out and set them on the desk. Barbatos grabs the one on top and quickly flips through the pages.

"It appears as though Michael has made some notes," he states as he sets the notebook back down. "Lord Diavolo and I will have to look at them more closely when the time comes." He leans down, opens a drawer, and sticks the notebooks inside. Then, he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a tightly folded piece of paper. He sets it in front of me.

"We need to test the extent of your magical abilities," he explains as I unfold the paper. "These classes will determine where your strengths and weaknesses lie." He allows me a moment to look at my schedule:

M: Advanced Potions -Lecture: 9:00-1:00 -Lab: 2:00-6:00 W: Advanced Curses and Hexes -Lecture: 9:00-1:00 -Lab: 2:00-6:00 F: Advanced Speechcraft -Lecture: 9:00-1:00 -Lab: 2:00-6:00

"I thought that students had classes during all five days of the week," I state.

"They do," Barbatos replies. "In your case, you will receive all day tutoring on Tuesdays and Thursdays." He looks over at Solomon. "Have you decided what day you want?"

"Thursday," he answers.

"Wonderful. Then I will take Tuesday."

"You two are going to tutor me?" Barbatos nods his head.

"Lord Diavolo's orders. We want to ensure that you retain everything you learn in these classes, both in a mental and magical capacity. He has also made the decision that you will be graded on the same scale as your fellow classmates, which means that you will be critiqued much harder than you were the last time you were here. We know you can't do it alone, so the two of us will help you complete any assignments you require our assistance with.

"Do you have any questions, MC?" I shake my head, too stunned to speak. Barbatos reaches in another pocket and pulls out another key.

"This is for the House of Lamentation. Your room has been prepared for your arrival." He hands the key to me. "Solomon, if you will be kind enough to walk MC there. I have to return to the student council meeting."

#obey me shall we date #obey me mc #obey me solomon #obey me barbatos #obey me simeon #obey me luke

[boysplanetrecaps]

Build Up Episode 2: Shall I..? and Ditto

Hello and welcome back to my current obsession, my MNET Build Up Recaps! In the previous one, we wrapped up episode 1. In this one, we’re starting episode 2. Let’s do it!

We kick things off with Dahee saying that Wendy had to leave because of her schedule, so for the rest of the performances today, only five judges will be judging. 

The first song to be performed will be…

Shall I Love You Again? (다시 사랑한다 말할까), originally by Kim Dong-ryul 

Shall I Love You Again? Also is known by the English translation “Shall we begin again,” which is a bit more palatable, I think. As far as I can tell, it came out in 2008. 

Per MNET’s translations of its captions, it’s “a song where the unique sensitivity of the original song and the digestion of profound and heavy bass are the key.” Um. Okay, sure. What’s interesting is that is exactly what google translate makes of the caption as well, suggesting that the translations are being generated via google translate.

Kim Dong-ryul, the original singer, is also the original singer of the song Drunken Truth, which I know as the song that Chen sang when he went on King of Masked Singer. So there’s that connection for me. Kim Dong-ryul apparently writes/composes/arranges all his own songs, so good for him! 

Vocal Coach Guy is a bit concerned about the song choice. “Isn’t this a bit retro?” he asks. “It needs to be clean to sound cool. It might not sound right to vocalists these days.” I mean, isn’t that a critique that could be made of most of these songs? IDK.

The guys come up from backstage, holding hands. 

Filmed as usual on one of MNET’s glorious Idaho russets. 

The judges are surprised to see Yeo One. “Pentagon?!” Baekho says. Hey, buddy. You are the LAST one to be surprised if a reasonably well established idol shows up on a reality survival show. 

Yeo One appears to be their spokesman, and they give a cute introduction as “Barista.” 

Kim Seohyung , Kim Seongjeong

Yeo One, Yoon In Hwan

Yes, I would like a cup of coffee. Unless it is between the hours of midnight at 5am, I probably want a cup of coffee. Thank you. You have my vote. 

Solar repeats, “Ba-ree-sta?” as if she doesn’t know what it means. Girl, didn’t you watch Coffee Prince? 

Yeo One explains that since they’re baritones and stars, they’re baristas! Ok, I give you that. You win, Yeo One. You win. 

Kim Seohyung the musical actor says he wants to make the stage shine with his warm voice. In my initial write up of him, I said that he has that classical “musical actor” voice that I don’t tend to like much. I said that I thought he belonged in the power category, not the unique category. We barely saw him on episode 1, but for some reason I get the sense that he’s a funny guy with an interesting personality. 

Kim Seongjeong again says that he has vocal, physical, and musical skills, then does a spin on one foot. He’s also a musical actor, and you may remember him as our adorable leaping lizard from episode 1. I said that his singing style isn’t the kind that I tend to respond to, but I respect its rich timbre and his excellent breath support. Plus, the leaping! We love the leaping. 

Yeo One says, “I’m Yeo One from Pentagon, and I’ll touch your heart with a warm tone like a vanilla latte.” Interesting that he says he’s in Pentagon still -- nice to have that confirmed. In my intro recaps, I said that Yeo One has a light, charming vocal color and a lovable vibe. He’s not a powerhouse vocalist, but he’s nice to listen to.

Yoon Inhwan shows a few exaggerated facial expressions and says, “From sad to happy, I’m a ballad singer who can pull off any genre.” Yoon Inhwan’s teaser performance was easily my least favorite. I really don’t care for his thick vocal color, but he has a powerful voice and a good sense of pitch. Learning that he specifically classifies himself as a ballad singer helps explain my personal dislike of his singing style. I’m sorry if anyone out there really likes the way he sings -- I’m not saying it’s objectively bad, I’m just saying that subjectively, I don’t like it much. But he seems to also be a funny, interesting guy. 

Vocal Coach Guy notes that all four have similar vocal ranges, then asks if they have a strategy to be chosen top tier. That cues the flashback…

Kim Seongjeong, our leaping lizard, chooses the song first; he was in fourth place and had an early pick. Next was Yeo One, who actually only got one vote fewer than Jay Chang and finished in 11th place. Soon after, Kim Seohyung joined, and then 24th place Yoon Inhwan joined. This was the third song to fill up, after Ditto and Tomboy, making it a pretty popular choice. 

Seongjeong chose the song because it suits his vocal range, but we find out that Yeo One chose it because he really wanted to work with Seongjeong. 

I think Seongjeong is really flattered -- I mean, Yeo One is pretty darn famous, so it’s always a good feeling. 

Turns out that Kim Seohyung, who Seongjeong and Yeo One call “The one with the coat,” is also a big fan of Seongjeong’s voice, and wants to work with him too. We learn that Kim Seohyung is a “newbie musical actor who debuted 0 years ago.” 

Seohyung doing some musical acting.

And once Inhwan joins, it’s a team full of good feelings!

We see a pretty short montage of them rehearsing and all promising to win this one. 

And then we dive in to the performance!

Here’s the version without all the reactions. 

My thoughts:

Will the great dog please grant me the patience to listen to all these ballads. I really, really hate this song. Sorry if it’s your thing, it’s just really not mine. Ok, let me try to talk about their performances. 

Overall, they were very good. Their voices were all fairly similar, so they blended pretty well. Also, it’s nice to hear some baritones in an industry that’s obsessed with high notes. 

Three of them are musical actors and they really sound like musical actors to me. Seongjeong, our leaping lizard, has the fullest, richest voice and it is in fact quite nice to listen to. Seohyung sounds similar, but not quite as rich and full. I can see the appeal of the way they sing, even if it’s not necessarily what I want to listen to most of the time. 

Seohyung, left, and Seongjeong, right. 

Yeo One was obviously trying really hard, and his voice was a lot fuller than I would have thought it could be. It was a little sharp, not in pitch but in quality, but it made a nice contrast to the others. His throat sounded a little tight, like he was straining, and he seemed to run out of breath on longer notes and at the end of lines. His comparative lack of training stood out, unfortunately. I’d love to see him just work with a vocal coach more, because his natural tone is very pretty. 

Inhwan was a lot better than he was in the teaser, without as much of that closed throat sound that he’d had initially. I still wasn’t wild about his performance, unfortunately. 

You guys, I’m so sorry, I just can’t say much more about this because I just hate this song so much that I can’t listen to it again. Forgive me. 

The MNET edit, as usual, emphasizes how great they are. There were some unhappy reactions from Eunkwang when Yeo One was singing, but that’s about it. 

Solar looked like she was going to cry at one point.

“I just hate ballads so much.” -- Solar, maybe

When they’re done, the judges and the boys back stage all applaud politely. They enjoyed the performance, but weren’t necessarily blown away by it. I don’t think that’s totally the singers’ fault.

When they’re done, the first thing the Vocal Coach Guy (VCG) says is that this is a difficult song to sing, and was made to be sung by one person, not four. Isn’t that true of a lot of songs, though? A ton of songs sung by groups are pretty personal. 

VCG goes on to say that Seongjeong sang it like a musical and did everything right.

Then Dahee asks Eunkwang what he thought of Yeo One, given that they’re from the same agency (Cube) and Eunkwang is Yeo One’s sunbae. There’s a bit of a pause, and then Eunkwang says, “I think you need to practice a little harder. I thought you should dig into the song in more detail.”

If you look closely, you can actually *see* Yeo One’s broken heart. 

The editors play clips and we hear the same notes that ended a bit too soon and didn’t have quite enough support. Yep, that’s what I noticed too. 

Hey, Eunkwang. You know that Cube doesn’t really help its artists in any way. Why don’t you help out your hoobae and offer more specific advice? I hope they meet later on and talk about it because Yeo One won’t get more trained just by wanting it more. That’s not how training works. 

After that, Eunkwang continues his “piss off BPR-Noona” shtick by saying that he liked Inhwan best. What in the…?

Solar praises Seohyung the most. She says that she got a bit emotional listening to the performance, maybe because of their desperation, she’s not sure. They say thank you. 

It’s time to vote for top tier. The judges seem to be torn between Seongjeong and Inhwan. I’m in crazy land.

The votes come in, and it’s…

… a tie.

Baekho and Solar vote for Inhwan, VCG and Eunkwang vote for Seongjeong, and Jaehwan unexpectedly votes for Yeo One. I bet he had some kind things to say about him, too, but the editors wanted to make it look like Yeo One was terrible and only showed Eunkwang criticizing him.

Backstage, Lim Jun Hyeok (former Day6) and Choi Ha Ram from team Breath joke that because the song is by Kim Dongryul, the score would be tied. The joke is that the name Dong Ryul sounds like the Korean word for “tied” as in tied score.

Dahee asks for a revote to break the tie, and the revote is really interesting.

Baekho and Solar both change their votes from Inhwan to Seongjeong.

VCG and Eunkwang hold steady with Seongjeong. 

And Jaehwan, ever the maverick, votes for Inhwan this time. 

So the top tier was chosen -- it’s our leaping lizard Seongjeong! I’m glad -- I’ve come to like his voice, even if it’s not what I normally gravitate to. But it’s got to kind of hurt for the other guys.

Eunkwang tells Seongjeong that he’s heard that Seongjeong doesn’t have much training, which surprises me a lot. Eunkwang says that Seongjeong can continue to develop his skills on this show. Hey Eunkwang, can Yeo One develop his skills? Or do you hate Pentagon for being younger and slightly more popular these days than you are? Is that the problem, Eunkwang? I’m sorry, team, but I’ve never liked this guy much and the more I see of him, the more I feel sure of it. I’m sorry if you’re a big fan of his. Maybe I’m misjudging him. But I can only judge what I see. 

Dahee asks Seongjeong how it feels to take top tier. He says he’s a little embarrassed because he needs to work harder. VCG tells him not to be so sad -- he won! I like VCG, you guys, even if I am physically unable to learn his name.

Almost immediately we dive into our next performance, and it’s…

Ditto

When the song is announced, the boys backstage begin singing the opening “hoo-hooo” like a wolf howl.

“Wooo-hoooo…”   LTR: Gwangsuk, Joohee, Inhyuk, all from team Tomboy

The judges wonder how it can this cover even be done? I guess they mean that it’s tricky because it was originally performed by young girls, but for me, I see a different difficulty. 

To me, Ditto is a weird choice for this competition because it’s not really a song -- it’s more like the idea of a song. It’s like the imprint of a song on a couch cushion after a song sat there for a while. It’s like a faint ring in the tub after a song took a bath there. It’s like the heat in a pile of blankets after a song slept there. It’s almost a song, but not quite. It’s the La Croix of songs. 

I’m not saying I dislike it. I mean, I like La Croix. It’s just that I don’t hear much in the way of chords. It’s kind of just a melody and a drum beat. So I’m not really sure how it could be rearranged. 

But of course, I understand the draw of picking it. It’s mostly in English, which would make it more appropriate for idol singers used to singing in English, and anyone like Jay or Soomin who is actually American. It also was a monster hit. A MONSTER hit. For me, the best song by New Jeans is obviously Attention but I don’t run the world, and everyone else likes Ditto, so, so be it. 

And everyone also loves Hype Boy, including VCG, who apparently was filmed at some point doing a dance cover of that song.  Cute. 

The Ditto team takes the stage, and they are full of MZ looks, apparently.

I had to look up what MZ meant, and apparently it is a combination of the two terms “Millennials” and “Generation Z” and is used in Korea as a generally broad term for younger people. It might also suggest young people who are on-trend…? More information requested. 

They all introduce themselves. Wumuti does his little Wumuti dance. You know, this one? 

..but more subdued.

“Chonin.. Wumuti-ti-ti-ti-ti…” 

VCG is like he’s still doing this? It’s a little cringey, actually. 

Woong announces himself as MNET’s would-be son, continuing his narrative. They’ll adopt you someday, Woong!  

Seokhoon says, “I’ll land in your hearts like a bolt of lightening.” 

Soomin says he’s a a singer-songwriter who looks like a goldendoodle. 

We see a flashback of the voice check and learn that throughout, Soomin was laid back, languid, almost asleep. Was he jet lagged? 

Our sweet Sunyoul from Up10tion interviews, “There was a guy with a beanie that seems to have a free soul. A real MZ from the United States. People like him tend to be really good singers.” I don’t know, Sunyoul. I’ve met a lot of American free spirits in beanies and with guitars who definitely are not good singers. Spend enough time at youth hostels and you will meet one million of them.

We see that Soomin introduced himself in English: “Hey guys, I’m a singer songwriter, 19 years old, from Chicago Illinois, Jung Soomin, nice to meet you.”

I love the look on their faces in the background. 

We’ve seen him use Korean pretty well, so why introduce himself in English? It feels like a weird power play. But maybe he said it twice, once in each language, for all we know. Regardless, it is a revelation to learn he’s 19 -- I got the sense he was quite young but I don’t know if I would have guessed quite that young. 

Since Soomin tied for fourth place, he was the first to choose Ditto. Seokhwa, Woong, and Wumuti all chose it when all other options were open, and this song was one of the first to fill up. 

We see them all introducing themselves so I’ll mention all their ages. Woong is 26 and Wumuti and Seokhwa are both 24, making the latter two chingus and making Soomin the maknae of this team and one of the two youngest on the whole show. He doesn’t seem to understand what the maknae role entails…. More on that later. 

After Woong and Seokhwa say that they’re in idol groups, Soomin says, “oh, you’re all idols?” And Woong says, “well, Seokhwa and I are idols.” Wumuti says, “I’m a half-idol,” then laughs with sad eyes.  

We cut back to a pre-production meeting, when a staff member asks Wumuti, “Are you working as an idol?” His reply is awful. He says, “ I’m filming challenge dances and whatnot…” Oh noooo. He goes on, “I need to debut. I’m always so close to debut, but it slips away. This time…. The first thought I had was, ‘what if it doesn’t work out?’ “

His eyes are shining with tears as he repeats, “I really want to debut.” 

We cut back to footage from episode one and see him make a beeline for Ditto. This was the song he really, really wanted. Wumuti is smart enough to know that to catch people’s attention, it’s best to cover songs that they already like. 

The team decides to tackle part distribution. (There’s a clip of this on Youtube with subtitles). Both Wumuti and Soomin want the opening part, the “hoo hoo” part. In an interview, Soomin says that Wumuti isn’t his competition, and kind of rolls his eyes a little when Wumuti sings. They both sing, and the other two guys vote for Soomin to take the part. Seokhwa kindly checks in with Wumuti to make sure he’s ok, and Wumuti says he is, but he interviews that he’s screwed. 

We go straight to the performance. 

Here’s the full version WITH reactions. 

Here’s the full version WITHOUT reactions. 

My thoughts: 

Overall, really nice. It’s nice to hear some more pop-style vocals after all the overwrought ballads. 

Soomin does have a really nice voice even if I’m not totally sure about his personality. It’s light and sweet, and manages to be pretty clean while still having some texture. But on the higher notes, when he’s not in his falsetto range, he sounds kind of strained and nasal. He definitely needs to work on that upper mix. It’ll be a real breakthrough for him.

Woong’s voice is rougher, almost husky, yet still smooth, like raw silk. I actually really like it, even if it’s not the official way that singers “should” sing. I like his pop-style take on the chorus vocals. 

Seokhwa has a bit of a rough time here. On the “I got nothing to lose…” he sounds really nasal and strained, like he’s having a hard time making the higher notes even come out. He’s pitchy, too. However, on the lower notes, he sounds much better, and gosh isn’t he cute? Also, his adlib “woah!” right before the end sounded really great. I hope he learns a little more about how to open up his palette to really hit those high notes.

Wumuti sings the best I’ve ever heard him sing. He matches Woong’s vocal color somehow, but brings in more warmth and performance. His little vocal gestures don’t come across as annoying or studied, and I have a low-tolerance for that kind of thing. 

Their harmonies sound amazing, too. 

Side note: 

What is with the whales in the background? Does this song take place underwater? 

In the MNET edit, we see that everyone listening is having a great time. The judges smile at Soomin’s intro, but think that Woong is going too fast. I didn’t really notice that, but I don’t know the song super well.  Eunkwang makes a face at Seokhwa’s weak high notes, but Jaehwan is into all of it.

Backstage, the guys call the music dreamy. Someone says that Wumuti looks like cotton candy. 

Jeong Inseong from KNK dances at his teammate Hwanhee.

“I thought I told you that I Do. Not. Dance.” - Hwanhee, probably 

When they’re done, Eunkwang says, “Difficult,” and Jaehwan says, “Is it too difficult?”

Choi Haram says it’s different to hear this song sung by four men, and Kim Minseo says it’s refreshing. 

Ok, for this part, the good feed I found at ok.ru punked out for a bit so I had to switch to https://wwv.dramacool.vip/build-up-vocal-boy-group-survivor-2024-episode-2-english-sub/ which does not have English subtitles despite what the title says. So it was me and my google-translate-camera again, and I did my best.  

The judging isn’t 100% flattering. 

VCG says something like, “It’s really important for a song to match the singers. And these two guys, Seokhwa and Woong, they’re better than the performance they just gave. You two chose the wrong song!” 

We see a clip of them performing again and the captions tell us that Woong’s voice is husky (true) and Seokhwa’s voice is delicate (true). “It’s a pity that the song selection doesn’t match the tone,” the caption concludes. 

Solar disagrees completely, though. She says she notices that Seokhwa and Woong were doing a little bit of choreography on stage, almost as if they couldn’t help themselves, and she liked it and found it a refreshing change. Yes, they have different vocal tones, but that’s the point of a singing group, that each person brings their own tone. She has a high opinion of their talent. 

Jaehwan says that Soomin has a languid charm. Everyone praises him, and he says thank you, sunbaenim! For some reason, it was wrong for him to do that, because everyone laughs. 

Backstage, Hwanhee jokes with Inseong that he (Hwanhee) could also sing languidly.

He demonstrates, but Inseong points out that all he’s doing differently is making his face look sleepy, and his voice sounds the same.

They all laugh. It really looks like this team is getting along great. I’m looking forward to them, even though I think they’re singing some sort of awful ballad. 

Back at the judging table, Jaehwan goes on to say that he likes how Wumuti kind of did his own thing during the performance. Yes, they were on a team, but Wumuti used it as a chance to do a solo performance -- after all, it’s a competition. 

I’m liking Jaehwan more and more. I feel like he’s been on so many of these competition shows as a contestant that he’s just going to do whatever the fuck he wants now that he’s a judge. He’s just like, “wheee! What’cha’gon’do’bout’it?” 

It’s time for the judges to vote. Eunkwang seems to find it very hard to pick a winner.

And here’s the results…

Baekho, VCG, and Eunkwang all vote for Wumuti. Solar and Jaehwan vote for Seokhwa from WEi. I’m kind of surprised that Seokhwa got that many votes -- I thought his was the weakest performance overall, in terms of technique. 

So Wumuti won! He can’t believe it. Aww! He stands there in shock, and it’s pretty cute. 

VCG says his vocals were very stable, and watching him made him happy. It was a good song choice. 

Dahee asks him how he feels. He answers, “I’m always in good spirits, but practicing for this performance, I thought a lot about how to make it better. I was really worried. So for the next performance, I will study the music and my voice and be more focused. Thank you.” 

The team takes a bow, and as they begin to leave, Jaehwan shouts, “Fighting, fighting!” Seokhwa smiles and makes a sort of “fighting!” gesture in return. 

They walk off stage arm in arm, all congratulating Wumuti, including Soomin.  

So, before we go to the next performance, I just want to talk a little bit more about Soomin and a possible villain edit. The thing is, the kid is American, and in the US we have different social norms. He seems to be pretty fluent in Korean, but seems to prefer English, so my guess is he might speak Korean at home with his parents, but I’d assume he speaks English nearly all the rest of the time. So he’d be learning Korean social norms a bit, but living in American social norms. Add in the fact that he is really talented and likely has been praised a fair bit, and the fact that he’s only 19 and mixing with established idols, this has to be a lot for his brain to process. 

Shows like this aren’t kind to people who come from different social norms. Just look at how the Chinese trainees are treated in MNET edits. Americans also often get misunderstood. Look at what happened to Yunjin on Produce48. I haven’t gotten to those episodes in my Produce48 Rewatch Project yet, but I remember vividly how she acted in a way that seemed perfectly normal to my American eyes but was misunderstood by the Korean public. 

Soomin probably thinks a bit of trash talking is fine and all in good fun. Or maybe he really is so full of himself that he thinks it’s appropriate to trash talk Wumuti, who seems in some way pathetic to him. Maybe. But I hope Soomin doesn’t get too bad of a villain edit, because he is so young, and managing the dizzying highs and horrible lows of being on a show like this would be hard for an adult, and doubly hard for a teenager in a group of 30 year olds. 

I guess we’ll see how this shapes up for him. I hope he figures it out, because he probably has a lot going on in his head right now and he needs to figure out how to get along with everyone if this is going to work out for him. 

And that's all I can fit in this post! I'll see you in the next one, when we tackle Tomboy (not THAT Tomboy).

And if you're enjoying the recaps, please feel free to tell a friend, or share on social media. I know that there are people out there who would like recaps like these if they could find them, so help us get connected. :)

See you soon,

xoxo BPR Noona

#bpr recaps build up #mnet build up #build up mnet #wumuti #ab6ix #wei #pentagon #yeo one

[practically-an-x-man]

alright I generally try to refrain from dumping heavy shit on your dash but can we talk about how exhausting it is to have a difficult/abusive parent that's actually socially well-liked?

more on this under the cut, read if you want but i just need to get it out of my head. difficult topics ahead.

My mother is successful. She manages a global team of people for a *very* major, worldwide company. Her team pulls good ratings and she's seen as an invaluable asset to the company.

She actually has a very positive relationship with her team: she's welcoming, not demanding, she encourages them to take breaks and prioritize their needs and she even has one meeting a week where all they do is play music and have trivia contests to keep morale up. She is, by all regards, a very good boss. Last year, her team pulled a perfect satisfaction rating (a fact she frequently brags about). The only reason that went down this year is because there was literally no other direction to go.

A few weeks ago, she came home and told us how a woman on her team had said, "C's kids are so lucky to have her as a mother". Whenever my sister's friends come to our house, there's always a comment about how she's so nice, so accepting, so welcoming, etc.. More than once, when her friends or coworkers are over to visit, they tell me how much I should value her, how incredibly good she is.

It leaves me feeling like I've imagined everything else. Because as soon as she's not entertaining someone, she lets that front down. And so the friends, the coworkers, the outside family members, they only ever see the pleasant-hostess side of her.

This is the woman who used to spank me and my sister - I remember one time she even threatened my sister (maybe 5-6 years old at the time?) with "next time I'm gonna spank your face". This is the woman who screams at our dogs, who sometimes even hits or kicks them, who threatens to fill the spray bottle with vinegar instead of water because "he needs to learn how to behave". This is the woman who let my severe medical issues go undiagnosed and untreated for two years (ages 12-14 for me), to the point that I was in constant agony, near suicidal, and effectively lost my entire social life at a time when building positive friendships and a good self-image is crucial.

She constantly dissuaded me from pursuing special effects, but now that I'm actually in trade school she brags to her friends about "I'm so glad she's following her passion!". When she complains, we are expected to sit through it - but if we complain even once, it's "whining". Even the most civil disagreements become "backtalk" and "attitude". I've been called sensitive, self-centered, mean, lazy, among other names. I've heard even more said about my sister and father behind their backs. She threatened to do nothing to celebrate Father's Day for my dad because she felt like he didn't do enough to celebrate her on Mother's Day - though he got her a gift and attempted to make her breakfast, exactly the same thing we were planning for Father's Day.

I repaint my room, her first question is whether I got paint on her carpet "again" (a long-held grudge from when I was eleven and spilled acrylic paint while working on a school project). I get my back tattoo, her only comments are "doesn't he hate his dad?" and to say that she thought I was getting tiger lilies for her instead. What's hers is hers, and what's mine is mine... but only until it displeases her. Non-stop critiques about how her siblings raise their families, not a word of self-reflection about ours.

There's more, of course. Close to twenty years of "more". But you get the gist of it.

And then I feel like I'm making it all up, because her friends can't stop telling me how wonderful she is.

#i'm sure i'll delete this later but i needed it to not be in my head right now #vent post #tw vent #tw swearing #tw emotional abuse

[violent-optimism]

The Problem with Modern Movie-Goers (and what needs to change)

Hello and welcome to something I’ve been meaning to write for a VERY long time.

Honestly, I don’t think I ever could have written this until now because I hadn’t gathered all the necessary thoughts yet.

Let’s just get straight into it because I have a lot to say and a lot of ground to cover.

When you hear the phrase “toxic fanbase”, what do you usually think of? Racism? Misogyny? Homophobia? Unfortunately, these traits are all too common even in spaces that are deemed “safe” by most. And while these problems are very serious and important to address, it’s actually not the main issue I’m going to focus on today.

When I write about fanbase toxicity, I’m going to be referring to something that isn’t talked about nearly as much, but I believe is equally deserving of attention. Let’s talk about people critiquing movies.

More specifically, let’s talk about people who give negative criticism about movies. Right off the bat, just to be perfectly clear…let me say that there is absolutely nothing wrong with disliking a film. Everyone has different tastes, preferences, etc. If you didn’t enjoy a piece of media, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. It would be a pretty boring world if we all loved and hated the same things, right?

What I have a problem with, is the insanely negative, overly-critical and fun-sucking way that people talk about movies these days. I’m not going to name any movies or franchises specifically, but I definitely have a few in mind when it comes to this subject and I suspect you do as well.

Not so long ago, it felt like whenever a movie came out that was generally considered “poor” or “not that good”, everyone would quietly and reasonably give their opinions and that would be that. Nowadays, not only are people EXTREMELY unkind about their opinions towards a film, but it’s like they purposely try to look for things in a movie to get mad about. There’s this intense bandwagon mentality that is usually divided into three different groups that are not mutually exclusive:

1)     People who hate something just because it’s popular

2)     People who hate something just because it’s a sequel/prequel/remake

3)     People who hate something because it was made by a specific company/studio

 And even if the film itself is generally considered to be good, “fans” will take it personally if the movie did not do everything exactly “right” or the way they wanted it. We’ve gotten to the point in film critique where it honestly feels like people are searching for the bad, not the good.

This leads me to my other big point: satisfaction. These days it feels like it is IMPOSSIBLE for anyone to be satisfied by a film anymore. The script has to be 100% perfect with zero plot holes. The CGI has to be flawless. All the actors have to be “wholesome” and “unproblematic”. Female characters have to be strong but not TOO strong or else people will complain that they’re overpowered Mary Sues. The list goes on…

It's like people aren’t even looking for entertainment anymore, they’re looking for something to be mad about. The conversation around all modern film has turned into a massive cesspool of people arguing over whose opinion is more “right” and why someone’s favourite film is garbage and needs to be cancelled or retconned. There’s no middle ground, no compromise, no room for someone to just stop and think for one SECOND, that what they’re saying about a movie might be hurtful for somebody else.

Even though movies are fictional, even though they’re “just entertainment”, it can feel pretty awful to hear someone rip your favourite film apart and talk about how bad it is. I really wish more people considered that before expressing their opinion. Again, this isn’t to say that everyone has to like the same thing. This is not about someone disliking a movie…it’s about the way they tell people how much they dislike it.

I also think that the line between “fact” and “opinion”, in film is starting to become more and more blurred. You hear so many people say things like: “That film is garbage”, in comparison to “In my opinion, that film is garbage.” See how such a subtle change makes such a difference? The second one feels more personal, more empathetic, like the person is taking responsibility for their opinion and recognizing that not everyone else feels the same; instead of just assuming that everyone does.

I feel like movie goers can’t just enjoy something for what it is anymore. Not only does a film have to be perfect, but if it’s not, people will go on…and on…and on about the things that the filmmakers should have done instead. I don’t know about you, but I sure am sick of hearing “They shouldn’t have done it that way. It would have been a lot better if they had done X instead.”

I don’t even get why people bring this up in the first place, because it’s not like any of us have the power to make these changes even if we wanted to. I think the only true example of this taking place would be with the “Sonic” movie that came out a few years ago, but that was a trailer, not the final product. Since when do people remake a film because it got bad reviews?

I get that it can be kind of fun to fantasize about the different ways a story can go; and that it can also be a little disappointing when things don’t happen the way you want them to. I totally understand that. What gets me the most is that we live in a moviegoing society where now: suddenly everyone thinks they’re Siskel and Ebert. Suddenly, everyone thinks they know what is best for a movie or a franchise. Suddenly, we have people who think they could do a better job than the directors, writers and hundreds of other people who make up a film set and get PAID to do it.

The arrogance of this thinking just makes my blood boil, and it also feels like a huge slap in the face to all the hard-working, creative people who poured their heart and soul into a piece of media. It might be easy for us to lean back, scoff and say “Wow, they put zero effort into this”, when we’re basing our opinions purely on the finished product and nothing else. We truly don’t know just how much time and hard work was required during the shoot.  Don’t tell me for one second that you could do better when you have NO idea what was actually required of these people behind the scenes.

Making movies is HARD, ya’ll.

Expressing your opinion about a film is starting to become a super vulnerable and scary experience. You never know what the other person is going to say or what is going to turn into a heated, childish argument. If you dare to say something good about a film that is (supposedly) universally hated, the masses will make you regret it so quick and so hard that you will never want to speak your mind about a movie ever again. The same thing works the other way around too, with people speaking negatively about films that are considered legends or classics. Basically, if your way of thinking goes against the majority, you’ll be flayed alive by a hoard of “fans” who will call you all sorts of horrible things. Gee, isn’t film great?

I thought movies were supposed to be about escapism and entertainment, not about proving who is right and who is wrong. Is it not enough for a movie to simply transport you to a different time and place for a couple hours? Is it not enough to see epic battles, fantastical locations and the triumph of good over evil? Why are all of our favourite franchises on such a high pedestal? Why have we given ourselves such grand expectations that are virtually impossible for any film maker to actually meet?

And why is it so hard for people to just sit back, relax and enjoy the ride? I know that for myself personally, movies are way more fun when I accept what’s going on, instead of getting irrationally angry that the filmmakers didn’t show exactly what I wanted to happen. They’re not mind readers, guys! Show me someone who could make a movie that would please millions of fans in exactly the right way that makes everyone happy. (Spoiler alert: they don’t exist).

It's hard to compare to how things were before social media. I wasn’t alive during the 80s, 70s or earlier, but I think I can safely say that the internet has definitely not helped this giant wave of negativity in fanbases. Everyone can safely hide behind a screen and say whatever they want about a movie, regardless of how true it is or how it affects other people. If we were to all take the screens away and have a simple, in-person discussion about movies, I can’t help but wonder if it would take a more positive (or at least more civil) route.

So what’s the big takeaway here? Basically, I think there needs to be a huge paradigm shift in the way general audiences and fans watch movies. I broke down a lot for you here and I think I only scratched the surface about this issue; but I think I can offer a solution with just one short formula:

Step One: You watch a film

Step Two: If you liked it, great! If not, respectfully move on and don’t ruin it for the people who did

Doesn’t that sound so easy? If only it actually were that simple and more people followed it. I wish more people talked about movies they loved, instead of bashing on ones they hate. I don’t mean to brag, but you don’t see me purposely looking up Youtube videos of films I dislike and commenting about it. I might not enjoy a certain film or series but you don’t see me going online spewing hate and ruining it for the people that do.

Life is honestly too short for that. I want people to tell me how inspired and passionate they are about a film. I want to see people’s eyes light up as they talk to me about why they think it’s the greatest movie of all time. That is way more interesting to me than any negative, cynical string of words will ever be.

I know a lot of this has probably preachy and like I’m on a bit of a high horse. You know what? I don’t care, I wanted to say it and I should say it. I want movie conversations to be enjoyable again. I should be able to say an opinion about a film without getting verbally attacked for it. I want people to just stop and think for a second before they speak and to realize that at the end of the day it’s just a movie and there is NO reason to put someone down just because they think differently.

Just be kind, ya’ll. That’s really what this is about.

 Thanks for reading.

#personal #film #rant/essay #my thoughts

[frozen-borderline]

Letter to Nico's son Ari

New York, October 1982.

"Dear Ari,

You don't know me but I know your, Mum, Nico. Her record company asked me to write a few words for her new release and rather than a serious "critique" I thought it would be fun to write you a letter and tell you a story about her.

There are many good stories about Nico. This is about her penchant for marvelously curious catastrophes and could be entitled: NICO AND THE DOCTRINE OF UNINTENDED CONSEQUENCES.

It was 1974 or 75 in Paris. I was managing MAGMA, a fiercely original and uncompromising band, not welcome, of course, on the radio, TV or in commercial clubs. We had a hard time getting gigs and saving money to improve the equipment and we were playing in Maison des Jeunes, parking lots, public squares, abandoned churches, slowly but surely making progress. Although I had never met your mother I knew her work and much admired her uniquely ironic and accurate sense of the dilemmas and contradictions facing modern artists. So, when my friends Bob and Barbara Benamou introduced me to her I was delighted. At the time, pursuing a seemingly obscure but no doubt meaningful artistic quest, she was working with Philippe Garrel who, besides literally starving, was making some mysterious beautiful avant-garde films. She was also living with him in this apartment where everything, but everything, was painted black. Now, you know your mother's propensy to dark, conspiratorial plots, no one can quite follow, and I don't precisely remember how it occurred, but one day she ended up living with my wife, my newborn baby and myself in our house in Sèvres. She was easy to live with, considerate and discreet, except that first thing in the morning she would ask one to partake in a concoction of 100 proof peppered Polish vodka with hot-sauce and God knows what else that would set fire to one's mouth. One night I took her to see MAGMA and she sort of fell in love with their music. Opening her eyes in wonderment she would say in her slow rounded speech: "Oh! But Giorgio, this is the best band in the world..." The band, particularly Christian Vander also liked her work. They, were due for a tour, she for a record, so, I thought, let's put them together for a while and, who knows, something great might evolve. As I told you, intelligent music was not exactly in demand and touring France was more like guerrilla warfare, with endless Identity Checks at toll-booths of the Autoroute, cancellations of concerts for political reasons and other no less harassing difficulties. We were, however, breaking new ground and just about perceiving the end of the tunnel. So, when on a cold, misty and wet morning in February - having warned Nico to expect a certain degree of discomfort - we left Paris, our spirits were high: She needed the money and we needed the exposure.

MAGMA's line-up at the time consisted of 7 musicians and 2 roadies and normally they would all be travelling in an old Mercedes van which took 9 people plus the equipment. With Nico and myself we were 12 now, so I took my car along, an old but comfortable 2-seater, Facel-Vega in which everyone wanted to ride and I had a hard time establishing fair turns.

The first 2 or 3 gigs want off well but as luck would have it - and thanks to drafty hotel rooms and poorly heated halls - your mother came down with a terrible cold. This prompted her to acquire a substantial supply of medicines of all kinds, culminating with a particular brand of cough-syrup which, much to our relief, seemed to alleviate her condition and generally keep her cheerful. Never mean when it came to sharing her discoveries, she invited us all to taste the healing properties of her elixir and soon, everyone began to sneeze, puff, cough and whiffle and buying little brown bottles.

A few days later at one of the most important concerts of the tour —in Lyon or Avignon— I remember her (and everyone else for that matter) getting on stage with a whole supply of these little bottles. Sipping and singing, singing and sipping, she stayed up there for over an hour and a half, finally provoking the legendary impatient French audience into cat-calls and boos.

You can imagine the mood the next day. Never short on quips, Die Alte Zwetschge ("Old Plum", an affectionate tease) was totally disconsolate, disenchanted and displeased with me, the tour, Magma, life and the whole thing. Our next gig was in Toulouse, quite a distance away and I planned to leave early with the sound-roadie to check out the old theatre where the show was scheduled. Somewhat apprehensive, I thought perhaps she should ride with me and the roadie but then decided she'd be more comfortable in the van and after imploring the boys in Magma to use all their guises to cajole her during the long journey, I left.

We got to the theatre early, checked="checked"things out and waited for the van to arrive. 7 O'clock, 7:30, 8, 8:30, no van. The concert was due to start at 9, so we began to worry a little and decided to backtrack up the road and find out what, if anything, had happened. You can imagine my horror when, in the middle of nowhere some 20 miles from the city, I saw the van lying nose down, off the roadside, in a 50 foot deep embankment and, but for empty syrup bottles, no-one in sight. Fearing the worst, I drove to the nearest gas station and called the theatre. No news. I asked the people there to call the police and every hospital in the region and holding my breath drove back to the city as fast as I could. When I got there a considerable commotion was under way: hundreds of people were crowding the entrance, pushing and shoving. Somehow I ploughed my way through got inside and there in the foyer the most sorrowful sight awaited me : looking like a bunch of wounded from World War 1, with bandages on heads, knees, elbows and feet, leaning on crutches and walking-sticks, sat Nico and the most forlorn-looking band of musicians I ever laid eyes on. I know that mine was perhaps not the most considerate reaction, but I couldn't help laughing. Naturally I tried to find out what had happened; between Nico's dark mutterings and the band's contradictory narratives it was impossible to figure out and to this day we'll never really know. I remember that with her bandages and walking-sticks your mother looked like the ultimate Mater Dolorosa of Rock & Roll at the mercy of Unintended Consequences...

Of course the concert got cancelled and so did the rest of the tour. Nico went back to Paris, then to England. Magma went back to saving money for a new van, and the record was never made. Who knows, it might still happen one day. In the meantime I often ask myself: What the hell was in that cough-syrup ?

Sincerely yours, GIORGIO GOMELSKY."

[forbidden-creepypasta]

We All Start Somewhere

First time poster, long time lurker. I've seen enough newfags get berated to know the treatment and I'm ready for it. Critique and criticism are welcomed and encouraged.

When I was young I never paid much thought to the foul creature who whispered to me in the dark moments before sleep. Sometimes it was too faint to hear, or in a foreign language. But when I could hear it I always wished I couldn't, atleast at the beginning. He only spoke of unnatural death and twisted monsters, never once a pleasant word.

He would tell me in terrible detail of those who have died, and how. I used to think that these were the stories of people he killed, but I abandoned that thought long ago. Once I tried to roll over and scream at him to shut up, but when I tried I could not speak. Since then I've never looked, only listened.

After many nights, for many years, I had begun to look forward to my time with him. It had got to the point when I could think only of death. I would envision every account that I was blessed with the night before, sometimes adding myself to the stories, either as the one causing death, or the one receiving it.

As I got older he visited me less and less until he eventually stopped coming altogether. This bothered me to some extent, not because I particularly liked him, but I did like the stories he told. I relied heavily on his wicked inspiration.

It had been many years since I saw him last, but recently he visited me again. He told no stories this time, but I knew he was there. For the first time in our many years together I spoke to him. I asked why he stopped coming. He didn't answer. I asked if this would be our last night together. Again no answer but I felt it was. Lastly I asked why there were no stories, if he was out. He laughed and said. "It's time for you to make your own stories."

This is a continuation of "We all start somewhere" You should probably read that one first, to make sense of this one. The third paragraph is in italics because that's inner thoughts, but in case there was anyone who didn't know. (not condescending) I am very much on the fence about this one. If you feel the first story works better as a stand-alone let me know.

He told me to make my own stories. I was never sure what he meant by that, but it has stayed with me my entire life, haunting me, and giving my very existence a purpose. Eventually came the day when I would uproot myself and set out on my search. For what exactly, I wasn’t sure, at least at the start.

I just needed answers; there were too many questions and not enough answers. So I searched and scoured for any clues, for anything. After some time I found myself in a distant land. By then I had found what I was looking for, although no closer to actually finding it. But in truth, I had found it, many times.

Begging your pardon. My vagueness is intentional. You will understand before its over, that’s my promise to you. Please understand that this is less for you, and more for me. I doubt you would listen anyway, not now at least. Something’s must be seen. Somehow I know it will all be painfully clear to you before this is over.

I had seen terrible things, and done worse. But it was all in the name of... Well, I can find no name to justify the things I've done, so lets just say it was all in my name. My travels had blessed me with many unnatural secrets that I did not believe mankind was ready for, or ever will be for that matter. So I vowed to only use them for my own gain. Perhaps loss is a more fitting word.

When I was a child I never paid much thought to the foul creature that whispered to me in the dark moments before sleep. So why should it be any different this time. Perhaps I can warn him. Stop him from becoming a monster.

So I spoke, because I knew he would listen.

Credit to: unnatural causes

#creepypasta #horror microfiction #creepy stories #horror fiction

[marenagalluccio]

Striving for Less Than My Best

If we’ve heard it once, we’ve heard it a million times: just do your best.

This expression might be encouraging, but there is a dark, toxic side to it too. As creatives—as people—we hear “do your best” but can wonder: what exactly is our “best”? There is no limit to what your best can be. It’s an arbitrary finish line that you can never seem to run across. And if we can’t imagine what our best looks like, we fear that no matter how much we do, we will never hit a satisfying point. 

I’m sure the OED would call this perfectionism. 

Recently I’ve been taking yoga very seriously. What started casually as attending a class here or there has recently become a two-time-a-week occurrence. I especially enjoy hot yoga, particularly the local yin class that’s calming and not as hot. There’s something about being in a yoga class and being told “listen to what your body needs, what you need out of this class.” Or “you don’t have to shoot for 100%. Shoot for 50%.” What a relief it is to hear you don’t have to strive for your best, that you’re already making progress by showing up. 

This is the mindset I want to have in my creativity. 

During the day, I am an advertising copywriter. But at night, I’m a creative writer. Currently I’m working on a YA Nutcracker-retelling manuscript and a short cozy fantasy story for an anthology my critique partners and I are going to self-publish. As creatives do, I am always thinking of new stories, ad ideas, blog posts, social posts, and so much more. But I have also recently acknowledged that I do two things that happen to work in tandem:

A lot of ideas race through my mind, but it feels like I only focus on one or two. This makes me feel like I truly get nothing done.

I want to execute some of these ideas, but I feel like I need to knock them out of the park or I’m not a very good creative. 

I’m here to look in the mirror and tell myself, “This is horrible thinking. Just because you’ve been working on the same story since 2018—and went through many hardships and life changes during then as well—that doesn’t mean you got nothing done. And just because you’re a professional ad creative during the day, that doesn’t mean you have to knock every single social/blog/Tumblr/etc. post out of the park or you’re an embarrassment to your creative knowledge. Capiche?” 

Capiche.

That’s why I’ve decided to listen to my yoga teachers and just show up—and I’m using this Tumblr as my canvas. I’ve used Wordpress and other blog sites before, but there’s something about being able to write here or post art or music of what’s inspiring me or just a note that I’ve actually worked on something today all in one place. I like that creative freedom. And if I want to take it any step further, then I can. 

There is no pressure here beyond to just be. 

I’m curious to see what I’ll create here. Probably mostly random thoughts like this, notes on what I’ve actually worked on, tips and tricks that happen to be working for me, what I’ve been reading/writing/gaming/watching/etc. and more. Feel free to follow along if you want. I’m just trying to get myself to be more creative and be okay with not being perfect with everything I do. 

So, welcome. I’m Marena, a Creative with lots of thoughts trying not to be a perfectionist. Come along and strive for less than my best with me. 

#writing #female writers #writerscommunity #creative writing #creative #creativity #writing community #perfection #deep thoughts

[baekluvie]

Someone Like You

one shot

pairing: reader x baekhyun

words: 23k (yea i know it's long, but that makes it better.)

genre: fluff, slice of life, eventual smut, high school AU!

description: you were a hardworking student that only focused on being the best. your best friend jongin being there for you every step of the way helps too, but something starts to change when you meet the new student that comes to your high school. what will happen as you decide to get closer to him? read more to find out about you and baekhyun as seniors in high school and what happens next in your adult life!

(a/n): GUYS. i am so excited to share this you! i worked and slaved over this piece for the longest time and i'm so happy to finally be done with it. probably the most angsty shit i've ever written? it would mean a lot if you reblogged and liked. remember!! requests are always welcome and i love it when you guys leave your critiques and feelings about the story. anyways you're in for a ride with this one shot.

You hurried down your school hallway as fast as you could, attempting to smooth out some wrinkles and kinks in your skirt while doing so. You knew you shouldn’t have stayed up that long studying last night, but you couldn’t help it. You’re the top student in your grade, you had to make sure that everything you did in school was up to the best of standards. As you finally reach your classroom, you accidentally swing open the door, creating a loud thud noise.

You wince to yourself as you stand awkwardly in front of your highschool classmates, who are all looking at you with wide eyes. You shyly shut the door behind you and walk to your seat at a quick pace. You look up towards the front of the room, your teacher staring right back at you. A chill ran down your spine.

“Y/N, you’re late. This is new.” Your teacher says in a mono-tone voice, and you could feel your cheeks becoming warmer by the second.

You stand up abruptly, tilting your head down to bow. “I’m sorry, Ms.Lee. This will never happen again.”

You swore you could slice the tension in the room with a knife, and then your teacher continues to speak about your english homework that was assigned. You sighed as you rose back up to sit in your seat again. You slap your hands on your face lightly, attempting to get rid of your bright pink cheeks.

“Y/N.” You look to the person on the right of you, a wild grin on his face.

“What, Jongin?” You whisper back to him as you take your homework out of your blue school bag.

Jongin was your childhood friend. You two were inseparable since birth since both of your mothers were best friends. They would always joke around saying the two of you would get married one day, but you couldn’t imagine having to marry someone as annoying as him. Don’t get it wrong, Jongin was your closest friend, one of your only friends, but that was exactly it. He was your friend. Plus, he was annoying and constantly wanted attention.

He smirks at you and looks back to the chalkboard, making sure the teacher wouldn’t catch him speaking to you.

“There’s a new cafe that opened up down by the arcade. Wanna go after school?”

You sighed as you tucked your hair behind your ear and scribbled down some notes. You haven’t really gotten the chance to spend some time out because you have been studying so much. Your mother also had been pestering you about staying in everyday as well.

“You know you’re never going to find a boyfriend if you stay inside all the time.”

“Mom, how many times do I have to tell you? School is my ‘boyfriend’. I like to study.”

And you did. You loved learning and studying and seeing all your effort pay off when you saw your name on the board as the top student in your class. It was the best feeling ever, besides seeing your name with the top high score in Space Battle, the video game in the arcade you and Jongin used to frequent a lot. With that thought in mind, you suddenly felt the urge to go there and play it again.

“Will you stop talking to me if I say yes?” You mutter back to him while staring ahead.

“Yes!” Jongin smiled.

You put down your pencil and cover your mouth with your hand and look at him,

“But we have to go to the arcade too.”

His eyes sparkled, and he nodded furiously, and you had to keep in your laughter before the teacher scolded you some more.

-

“Y/N can I speak to you for a moment?”

You turn your head to your teacher, and you wave to Jongin telling him to go on without you. He picked up his bag and left, alongside all the other students. You gulped as you walked to her desk, her eyes glued to her laptop as she was typing.

She continued to type once you arrived, and didn’t make any eye contact when she spoke again.

“There’s a new student arriving tomorrow,” She lets her fingers rest and readjusts her glasses to look at you, “I expect our top student to show him around and let him get to know the class. I’ll let the principal know that you’ll be helping him, so you don’t have to worry about getting in trouble for attendance.”

You nod. “That’s not a problem. I’ll do my best.”

With a simple smile, she thanked you and you made your way out of the classroom. You turn the corner and see Jongin sitting on the ground, his back leaning on the wall next to the staircase. He had earbuds in and looked like he was asleep. You kick him gently with your foot, jolting him awake and cursing at you.

“Fuck, Y/N, you could have just tapped me or something. Guys won’t be interested in mean girls like you.” He dusted his pants off as he stood up and towered over you, flicking your forehead while you laughed.

“I don’t really care about what boys think about me.” You both walk down the stairs and Jongin sighs.

“You know, I haven’t seen you study this much ever. All we do is go to the library, it’s not even fun. My mom thinks we’re dating and she keeps getting mad at me when I tell her you’re my worst nightmare and that it’ll never happen.”

You skip lightly down the hallway, smiling. “Well, keep telling her that. Maybe if our mom’s hear how we’re repulsed by each other they’ll get the hint and leave us alone.”

He pouts as he stops in his tracks. “Y/N, can we please just hang out like we used to? I know that it’s our senior year and we have to try our best but we deserve a break. I think my eyes are going to explode if I have to study English again. I still don’t understand how to pronounce jenre or fohx.”

You burst into laughter, making Jongin frown at you. “It’s genre, and faux.”

He raises his hands like he’s accusing you, “Don’t rub it in that you’re smarter than me. It doesn’t make me look good.”

You stick your tongue out at him. “Maybe if you paid attention when we studied you’d know the difference, Nini.”

“Anyways, I have to introduce and show the school to a new student tomorrow. Maybe we could get to know them and invite him to study with us,” You put a finger to Jongin’s lips to stop him from interjecting, “and then you could have someone else to hang out with when I’m studying.”

He moves your fingers off his lips and ponders for a moment. “That could work.”

You puff your chest out proudly, “Of course it will. That’s why I’m the smart one out of the two of us.”

You walk ahead of him while he tries to catch up with you to your next class. This could be nice, you thought. Jongin doesn’t really have many other friends than you, but that was just because he was shy. He hit it off with the girls in your school but all of that made him disliked by his male classmates. This would be good.

-

You and Jongin got out of school and immediately headed down to the new cafe that he was speaking about. You ordered two iced americano’s for both of you, to which your friend thanked you. You sat down in the cute little cubby, the wooden frames were a light hazelnut color. The ceiling had plants hung in little rope woven baskets, with fairy lights that created a sensual and cool mood. You liked it, you could definitely study here if you wanted to.

“I bet you’re thinking this is a good study place, right?” Jongin remarked to you as he took a sip of his coffee, scrolling on his phone. You scoff and wave your hand at him, silently wishing he didn’t know you so well.

“Well it is nice and quiet here. I like how the lights are simple, whenever we study in the library my eyes start to hurt because it’s so bright in there.” You place your hand on your chin while you speak to him. He rolls his eyes at that and places his phone down.

“The reason your eyes hurt is because you’re staring at your laptop and books for 6 hours straight, Y/N. You need to learn how to take a break. Studying is going to be the death of you, you know? I heard that working too hard can cause death,” It’s your turn to roll your eyes, “you think I’m kidding? Look it up.”

He pushes his phone to you and you hold it up to your face grudgingly, deciding to search up the accusation.

Your eyes read over the first result.

“Karoshi, '' which literally means death by overwork. After the 1973 oil crisis triggered widespread workplace restructures, reports emerged of worker fatalities, most often from heart failure, stroke or suicide.”

A Japanese term, you noticed as you continued to read. You were taken by surprise, moreso that Jongin knew about this, which made you think that he’s been worrying about you. Your heart starts to pick up, and you unconsciously touch your best friend’s hand while you put the phone down. You felt guilty, just a little bit. You knew you studied too much, but you had led a hard life. Your father left your mother when you were young, leaving you guys with little to no money to take care of the both of you.

Your mother worked hard, she had three jobs just to keep the two of you off the streets. Your mother was caring throughout all of it, using spare money that should have been saved to treat you with sweets and small gifts. You felt like a burden a majority of the time, so that’s why you decided to work harder in your school studies. Since the age of 8, you would become a straight A student, and you would strive for better if you could.

Extra credit, volunteer work, even going to your local college to attend their conferences revolving around success. You knew you had to try your best in order to give your mom and yourself the life you both deserved. The best part about it was that you were doing it all yourself, with no help from anyone. At times you felt as though you appreciated your father leaving, and even though that was a terrible thought to have, you felt it made you more determined. You would never admit that to your mother, but the setback in your early life had set you up for success, you knew that it did. It had to.

You put a strong front up and smile at Jongin, who tightened his hand over yours.

“I’ll do better. I’ll be a better friend. But please understand where I’m coming from. You know I have to do my best in life or I’ll fail.” You whisper to him, your lips shaking, but you maintain your control on your emotions. You never want people to see this side of you, even him.

He sighs, “I know, Y/N. I just don’t want you to miss life, you know… you need to live a little more. Or else you’ll regret it when you’re older.”

He stands up from his seat, your eyes following him. He grasps the translucent coffee cup and downs it in one go, and lets out a small yell like he had just finished running a race. He looks down at you and smiles, grabbing your hand and dragging you out of the cafe. You almost trip since he was tugging you so hard.

“Hey! I didn’t finish drinking my coffee, you punk!” You screech out.

“You said you wanted to go to the arcade, right?” You both come to a halt as you stand in front of the neon sign that displays, ‘Arcade’, in bright red. Your eyes glimmer, and you could feel your heart beating fast, just like when you’re waiting to see your test results. You hadn’t come here for a while now, telling Jongin that you didn’t have time to play games like a child anymore. You forgot how much you missed it, that nostalgic feeling you received just by standing in front of the shop.

He turns to you while opening the door, putting one hand out gesturing you inside.

“Are you ready to have some fun?” He grins.

You hesitantly step forward, your lips pulled into a tight line. You deserved this, you thought. You need to learn how to live, like Jongin said. You could afford to just hang out with your friend and have fun for one night. It wasn’t like doing this would set you back in your studies anyways.

You flash him a smirk, grabbing his free hand and dragging him inside with you. The first thing you took into account was the smell of coins. You remember loving that as a child when you and Jongin would come as children. There were dozens of vintage arcade games, the ones you would put coins in. There were some stray pinball machines and even karaoke rooms in the back of the building. The flooring was felt carpet, decorated with 80’s inspired squiggles in various colors. The overall vibe of the arcade was supposed to take you back in time, that sweet nostalgic feeling that you had missed from this place. You continue to lead Jongin through the isles you had memorized and stopped in front of the game that started it all for you.

Space Battle.

“Jesus, I’m surprised that they still have this in order. It’s so old. I’ll go buy us some coins.” Your friend walked off to the front, while you stood in front of the game watching the little slideshow of the spaceships shooting against each other. The screen fizzled out and then appeared the high score screen. You smile as you wait to see your username at the top, something you pride yourself in since it took you so long to beat. But then your heart drops.

kyoong04 - 1,927,086

You could feel yourself deflating when you saw that. But anger soon came over you, as soon as you saw your name underneath the enemy that stole your thunder. Who would try so hard to beat your high score? You had played the game for months just to secure your title, and within a couple of weeks it was beaten, just that easily?

You pound your fists against the gameboard, earning you some looks from the other people next to you playing games. You clench your teeth together and tilt your head, glaring at the username with hatred. You would beat this person’s high score, you were determined.

Jongin had come shortly after, talking about the girl who exchanged his money for the coins and how cute she was, but you didn’t have time for that. You greedily grab the coins from his hand and insert them into the machine, quickly pushing the buttons and aiming for precision and perfection. You probably spent two hours attempting to beat the score, but with a loud sigh and feet stomping, Jongin had convinced you that it was time to go home.

You pouted as you both walked in the cool warm air, every now and then he would tease you about how you looked while you were playing.

“I've never seen you so angry before. It was like a different person came out. You’re a monster when it comes to video games.” You feel yourself soften at that, his words raising your confidence a little bit.

You cross your arms together and attempt to smile, “You should know it all too well. I beat you every single time we play online together. You need to step up your game.”

He laughs at that and pushes you, causing you to almost trip.

“Ah… I don’t really care about that. As long as I can have fun with you, it doesn’t matter. I really liked seeing this side of you again, Y/N. I want to have more memories like that.”

You walk closer next to him and lay your head on his arm as you continue to walk. You did have a lot of fun, even though you were too focused on playing the game. Jongin cheered you on and tried to help you by pointing out which spaceships were close to hitting you. You didn’t notice it then, but he never left your side. He had just as much fun as you did, just by being with you. You didn’t want to miss out on these memories either, you knew you had to try and spend more time with him. You could surely balance your school and personal life if you really wanted to.

“How about tomorrow we go to the amusement park? I have some money saved up and it’s Friday anyway. I can always study on Sunday.” You smiled at him, and his eyes look like they’re going to pop out of his head.

“Holy shit. If I knew that all I had to do was sweeten you up with some coffee and video games, I would have done this so long ago. Let’s do it! Wait, didn’t you say that we would hang out with the new student tomorrow?” He looks at you questiongly.

Oh right, you forgot about the new student. You shrug and push your hair out of your face.

“We can just invite him. Like I said earlier, it would be nice for you to have someone else to hang out with besides me. Let’s just try and befriend him.” You turn to him and nod your head.

He walks you to your front door, and you give him a tight hug. You had missed him. Although you saw him everyday and practically dragged him with you to every studying session you had, you didn’t get to feel the true friendship you had with each other before tonight. It had been too long, and you didn’t want to take it for granted again.

You let go of him and open your door. You look back at him,

“Make sure you flick your light off and on so I know that you made it home.”

He chuckles at you, “Y/N, we’re neighbors. You know that I’ll make it home safely. Dork.”

He turns around and runs to the house, and you wait until you hear his door slam shut before you enter yours. You shrug off your school bag and stretch, eliciting a groan from out of your mouth. Before you make your way inside, you grab your phone out of your bag and hold it tightly. You drag your tired feet down the small hallway of your home, knocking on your mother’s door.

“Y/N?” You softly open the door and see your mother laying down, her feet propped up on a pillow while reading a book. Her long brown hair striped with gray tones falls effortlessly on her face, and her pale skin emits a rosy blush when she makes eye contact with you.

“I’m home.” You said in a sing-song voice as you sat down on her bed and kissed her cheek. She examines you and places her book down. She looks tired, you could see it in her eyes.

“Studying at the library again? You should be doing other things than that, you know.” She scolds you while turning you around and brushing her hand through your hair. She starts to braid it, and you can’t fight the somber smile from forming on your face. She never stops working, even when she gets home.

“No, I actually hung out with Nini today. We had coffee and went to the arcade you took us to when we were younger. It was nice.” You played with your phone while your mom tightened your braid.

“That’s good. I’m glad you’re taking some time for yourself, baby. You deserve to have fun, you’re so young and beautiful.” You turn around once she finishes and gave her a smile. You bring her body towards yours and hug her tightly.

You look down as you hold her head in your hand. “I told you to ask for fewer hours at the supermarket mom. The convenience store and bakery insisted on giving you less hours already. Your feet aren’t getting any better.”

She hums against you, and you already know what she’s going to say.

“I have to, Y/N. You know that. I’ll wear the acupressure slippers you got me around the house more. They really have helped me out so much, I just forget because I’m not here alot.”

She pulls back and kisses your nose, you scrunch it up and pat her hand before you rise up and head to your bedroom. You immediately collapse on your bed, but you quickly spring back up. You forgot that you didn’t look out your window just yet. You skip over and peer into the dark, and see that Jongin was already waiting there, sitting on the panel of his window, his left foot dangling outside the frame while he had his earbuds plugged into his ears. You always chastised him for doing that because you worried he’ll fall out. He would reply cheekily that he would only fall a couple feet, ‘Y/N we both live in one story houses’.

You open your window and wave around, trying to catch his attention. He looks from the corner of his eye and takes one earbud out, smiling at you.

“I made it home safely, Y/N.” He says in a teasing tone.

You giggle. “Goodnight Jongin. See you tomorrow.”

“See you tomorrow.”

You close your window slightly and head back to bed, feeling sentimental. For the first time in a while, you finally felt you could allow yourself to take a break. You were too tired to change out of your clothes, so you just wrapped your covers around you and turned off your lamp that was on your bed stand next to you. You get your phone out and set an alarm for 7:00, but before you put it down, the screen reminds you of the arcade game.

Although you didn’t want to think that you were so upset over someone beating your high-score, you couldn’t help but feel defeated and frustrated. Something so small, yet it created such an impact on you. Being number one was basically your entire basis of who you were.

You sigh and gently put your phone down on your nightstand and roll over, the night sky leaving a fluorescent glow entering through your window. You could hear the crickets chirping outside, and the slight breeze emitting from it made you sleepy. You only had one thought before you submitted to your exhausted body.

kyoong04.

-

You didn’t wake up to the sound of your alarm, no you wish that it did. Instead, you were woken up by your next door neighbor barging into your room yelling your name at the top of his lungs.

“Y/N! Y/N! Wake up!” Jongin shook you awake, which resulted in you moaning as you attempted to push him off of you, but it was useless against him. You could have been hitting him your hardest and he wouldn’t even move in an inch.

“Ah… why do you do this to me?” You pick up your phone with your left hand while your right arm covers your eyes. You move it slightly to tap on the screen, it was 6:30.

You send a death glare to Jongin, who is already dressed in his uniform, a blinding smile being sent in your direction. You wanted to punch it off of him and slap his face. You were so tired from hanging out so long yesterday, you were hoping to get a little more sleep in. You grunted as you sat up in your bed, dragging your face down with your hands.

He sat next to you and patted your head, occasionally letting out little coos and pet names to you.

“Aw… did you sleep well? Are you still tired?” He lets out a sharp inhale and smiles at you innocently, as if he didn’t create the monster in front of him.

You push his hands away in disgust and swing your legs off your bed. You pick out your uniform from your closet and set it on the bed before going into the hallway, the cold floor hitting your feet. You pick up your toothbrush and apply a small amount of toothpaste and wet it underneath the water spout. You lazily look at your appearance in the mirror, your long hair resembles a bird’s nest and your dark circles look more apparent.

Jongin pops into the mirror as he leans against the door, his arms crossed over one another and still continuing to smile at you. Although you were quite grumpy with him for waking you up early, you did suppose it gave you a little more time to get ready. Even though you didn’t know what the new student was like, you wanted to leave a lasting impression on him to guarantee his place as Jongin’s number 2.

“I’m so excited for today. I can’t wait to go to the amusement park. We haven’t done that since we were in middle school.” Your friend trailed behind you as he excitedly chirped.

You suppress a smile as you sit down on your vanity near your window, grabbing your makeup bag next to your jewelry box. You quickly put on some light foundation, blush, and curl your eyelashes. You hummed to yourself as you layered the mascara on your eyelashes, giving you a nice pop to your look. Jongin laid on your bed as he scrolled aimlessly on his phone, and quickly closed his eyes shut when you began to pick up your uniform.

You weren’t really shy around your best friend like that to make him leave the room or anything, I mean the both of you literally bathed together when you were infants. Still, you always gave a little remark to him to shut his eyes, ‘this isn’t a strip tease’. To reach he always replied, ‘gross’.

You straightened out your uniform with your hands making sure there were no creases or bumps, and you tapped the bottom of Jongin’s foot with your hand, motioning him to get up.

“You know, it’s a good thing you woke me up early. The new student probably has to be there before anything starts. He should be there before we arrive. Maybe we should get something at the bakery?” You asked your friend as you both made your way out of your room and down the hallway.

Your mother had already left to work like she always did, at 6 in the morning. Her opening shift was at the bakery, to which you and Jongin tried to get to before school everyday. But Jongin usually woke up pretty late which resulted in skipping breakfast and being scolded by you to run to school to get there in time.

He nodded to you as you slipped on your shoes and picked up your school bag you had left on the floor yesterday night. You leave the house and trail down the gravel path down your neighborhood and reach the town’s little shopping center. You were always grateful you lived in a smaller town since it was all so knitted together. The school was roughly a 10 minute walk while restaurants, bakeries, and cafes were only around 5.

As the two of you make your speedy journey to the bakery a thought enters your head.

You reach the little shop and open the door up as you speak, “Let’s get the new student something to eat too.”

Jongin let’s out a simple grunt in agreement as you approach the register, your mother smiling at the both of you.

“Jongin-ah, you look so handsome. When are you going to ask Y/N on a date?”

You both groan as she continues to compliment him while he tries to keep the conversation away from the weird request.

“You know you and my mom say that every, single, time.” He says through his teeth.

Your mom waves him off and laughs, and she begins to grab some bread for the both of you. She’s about to hand it over to you before you stop her. You pull out your wallet from your school bag and hand over a 5 dollar bill. Your mother looks at you quizzingly.

“You know you don’t have to pay.” She bluntly states, and she pushes the packaged bread into Jongin’s hands instead.

“Ah no, I wanted to pay for another sweet bread for a new student. I’m going to be showing him around today so I wanted to make him feel welcomed.” You leave the bill on the counter as you reach over and grab another loaf and dart out the store. Jongin starts to giggle as you hear your mother screaming at you to come back.

You both ate the warm bread as you walked to the school in a comfortable silence. Your mother was always so picky with the money that you spent, mostly because she felt happier when you had enough. She would get in trouble often at the bakery since she gave you guys free food, but you always sneakily went back when she got off her shift to pay your dues. She was stubborn, but that’s where you got it from. You were glad you received that trait from her, otherwise you didn’t think you’d be excelling at school all too well; the stubbornness of wanting to always study paid off, all the time.

You held the tasty gift in your hands as you finally got onto your campus, Jongin waving to you and wishing you luck with introducing the new student.

“Meet me by the soccer field at lunchtime with him. We can all talk then.” He winks at you before he sprints off towards the school building, leaving you to walk towards the information office alone.

You open the door and greet the receptionist, bowing your head. Your feet echoing in the empty room as you make your way closer to the desk.

“Ms.Lee told me I would be showing the new student around the school today. Is he here?”

She nods. “He’s just speaking to the principal. I’ll let him know that you arrived.”

You stand there awkwardly, cradling the baked good in your hand while she called for you. She hangs up the phone and ushers you to go down the hallway to the office, and so you went. You reach the door, looking at the plaque next to it on the wall labeled, ‘Mr.Nam’. You reach your hand out to turn the handle but suddenly the door opens way too fast for you to realize.

You stumble forward and almost eat total shit, but two arms wrap around your waist and you hear a worried, “Oh my god.”

Your body moves upward as the two arms that caught you placed you back on your two feet, and you could feel your face starting to burn up. That was so embarrassing, you thought. You regroup and look up, and you’re met with the kindest eyes you had ever seen.

He had black hair that covered his forehead, swooped and well maintained. His warm brown eyes stared deeply into yours, and his eyebags were protruding cutely. He had such distinct facial features, his jaw and cheekbones being very much a visual point. His lips… were puckered and pink, and they were moving. Oh shit, they were moving.

“...I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have opened it so quickly. Are you okay?”

His voice was light and almost melodic. You could feel your heart racing against your chest, and oh my god, why were you so nervous right now?

You let out a dry cough and direct your eyes to your principal behind him.

“I’m very sorry for the disturbance, Mr.Nam. I’ll be showing him around the school and making sure he is up to date with everything.” You bow to him and he lets out a chuckle.

“That’s alright. Good. Make sure you help him with finding his way around the school.” Mr.Nam rises from his seat and folds his hands together while he smiles at the both of you.

You and the new student smile as you bow again, and then you both make your way out the door and down the hallway. You kept notice of how he kept the same pace as you, the way his hands dangled by his sides and swung every now and then. You couldn’t look him in the eyes again, you didn’t know why he had such an effect on you.

He opens the door of the information building for you and you thank him, keeping your head down as you wait for him to join you. He stops and places a hand on your arm, and speaks.

“Again, I’m so sorry. I’m glad I was able to catch you before you got hurt.” You raise your eyes to meet him again, and he had an apologetic look on his face.

You shrug as you blush, diverting your eye contact again. “It’s not a problem.”

He stays silent for a moment. “What’s your name?”

You whisk your head and reply slowly, “Y/N. What’s yours?”

He reaches his hand out and flashes a grin. “Baekhyun. Byun Baekhyun.”

You shake his hand and then you remember you were carrying the loaf still. You abruptly shove it into his hands, and he jumps back a little before he examines it and grips it softly in his palms.

“My mother… She works at a bakery. I thought you’d be hungry since you had to come in early.” You spill out.

He looks down at the bread, and then looks back at you. His eyes brighten as his pink lips come together to form a small smile.

“Thank you. That’s very thoughtful.”

After that, you both spoke to each other informally, since he insisted that it would make the conversation flow more easily. He liked to sing, and even showed off a little to you as you roamed the halls of the school together. He had a pretty voice, and he wasn’t afraid of showing it either. His voice echoed loudly in the deserted school building, and you were intrigued with his confidence. You would be too afraid to make any noise while students were in class, but he didn’t seem to care at all. You took him outside again, walking towards the soccer field.

“My mom moved here after my father passed away. It’s cheaper and she read online that this was a quiet town. She doesn’t really want to be around a lot of people since it happened. Neither do I.” Baekhyun let out a nervous chuckle.

You look at the ground as you walk. “Were you close with your father?”

He blinks numbly. “No. He had been hard on me since I was young. Always expected the best. So that’s what I gave him. There was never really a big connection with us other than him checking on my grades.”

You nodded. “Still, the pain of losing someone hurts.”

Baekhyun shrugged. You gesture to a bench that overlooked the bright green field, and he happily sat down. He finished eating the rest of his bread, popping his fingers in his mouth to remove any leftover crumbs. You snicker.

“That good, huh?” He smirks and nods.

“You’ll have to show me the bakery sometime.”

“Of course. They have the best baked goods here in town. My mother bakes those loafs fresh, so getting them in the morning is the best time. I can bring you some often if you’d like?” You ask him shyly.

Baekhyun nods his head furiously, “Yes! That would be nice. Is it just you and your mom living here?”

“Oh, yeah actually. My father left when I was young. I didn’t really know him.”

He looks at you, like he’s waiting for you to go on. So you did.

“Um well… My mother works three jobs. We don’t have a lot of money, but we make do with what we do have. I mostly focus on my studies,” You look off to the sky, “if I can succeed in school then I can make sure my mother lives comfortably.”

“I aim to be the perfect student. I only want the best grades, to get accepted to the best university. Land a well paying job. That’s my dream.” You turn back to him, you couldn’t really read his face. He wasn’t smiling, but you could feel the warmth and understanding radiating off of him.

“That sounds nice and all, but, do you have any time to just… live your life?”

You don’t say anything for a moment once he speaks. You look at him but nothing comes out.

He intertwined his hands together and continues to look at you.

“I also wanted to make my father proud of me. I lived by his standards, his rules. For the most part, it was nice being the top student in my class. I kind of thrived off of it. But when I went to sleep at night… All I could think about were the classmates that played soccer with each other. The way they laughed and joked with one another. It made me realize that I wasn’t living for myself anymore, I was unintentionally living through my father. Once he passed away, I began to look at life differently. I still did well in school but I started to do things for myself. I hung out with my mom more, even started talking to my friend again after my father told me to shun him.”

You look at him with amazement. You weren’t expecting him to be so open with you, but in some ways you were glad that he did. You weren’t used to talking about your emotions or the troubles you had faced in your life… mostly because Jongin knew all about it. And it wasn’t like you wanted to burden your mother with how you felt, you didn’t want to give her that pressure. Baekhyun was just so easy to be around… you felt comfortable around him.

“So, I guess what I’m saying is that you shouldn’t try to live for others, but I’m not trying to dismiss your goals, because they make sense. But you can’t forget about your life either.”

The wind blew your hair from out of your face as you sat there, stunned. Baekhyun maintained his eye contact with you, a stern expression plastered on his face. You don’t know why you did it but you just had the strong urge to, and without thinking you moved closer to him.

You hugged him.

He didn’t hold you back at first, but you soon felt his arms wrap around you, bringing you closer to his chest. The tears started to pool from your eyes, and you could feel yourself start to hiccup as you attempted to keep in the sobs from escaping your mouth. You just met him but you felt like he understood you more than anyone else at that moment.

“Thank you.” You whisper out.

“You don’t have to thank me. Just give me more of your mom’s bread and I won’t tell anyone that you cried.” You pull back as you laugh, wiping the tears from your cheeks.

You get a better look at him as he smiles at you and nods his head.

“I have something better than bread if you’re interested.” You state.

His eyebrows sprung up and his mouth rose in interest.

“What could be better than that amazing bread?”

“My friend, Jongin. We were planning on going to the amusement park after school today. Would you like to join us?”

“I didn’t know there was an amusement park near here. It’s kind of an isolated area.” He replied.

“We’d have to take the train to get to the main city. It wouldn’t take us too long. Are you up for it?” You secretly were wishing he’d say yes.

He hesitated for a moment… but then that charming smile showed up again.

“Sure.”

-

You didn’t know what to expect when Baekhyun and Jongin would meet, but it certainly wasn’t this. The two of them hit it off straight away, with Jongin saying that Baekhyun was really handsome, leading to Baekhyun getting a big head and pretending to model.

You never saw your best friend laugh so hard before, and before you knew it, they were talking about what different artists they liked, video games, and other things that didn’t pique your interest whenever Jongin would talk to you about it. It wasn’t until Jongin asked him that stupid question that made your heart almost fall out of your body.

“So what’s your type? There’s actually a lot of pretty girls that go here.” The three of you had sat under a tree on the field, the shade protecting you from the sun rays.

You bit your lip as you found the bag of chips you were eating from really interesting. You just met Baekhyun but it wasn’t hard to deny that you thought he was cute. He had a way with words, and the conversation that you had earlier really touched you. You weren’t sure if he was always that open with people but regardless, you could tell that he genuinely meant what said.

Baekhyun plucked the grass absentmindedly while smirking.

“I don’t really have a type.” He looked back at Jongin who narrowed his eyes at him, plucking some grass and throwing it in his face.

“Oh come on! You have to have a type. What, are you embarrassed because Y/N is here? She’s hardly even a girl.” It was your turn to throw something, and you made sure the bag of chips in your hand hit him with enough impact. Instead, it sadly hit his arm and fluttered down, the wind picking it up and causing it to fly away.

“I’m very much a girl. Don’t act so cocky, it’s not like you tried to make a move on anyone here for the past four years.” You stick your tongue out at him, and he makes a face back at you.

“I prefer older women. Younger girls aren’t mature enough to handle me yet.” You laugh at that, and so does Baekhyun. Your mood instantly brightens.

Baekhyun turns to you, and raises a finger. “What about you? Do you have a type?”

You weren’t expecting him to ask you that, and Jongin could tell that you weren’t either. You see him in the corner of your eye, the sudden realization dawning on him. You silently hoped that he wouldn’t say anything, especially after seeing his lips form into a mischievous smile.

“I haven’t really thought about it. I mostly spend most of my time thinking about studying. And how Nini doesn’t get any girls because he’s too shy to talk to them.” You jab at your friend who’s ego is slowly deflating before your very eyes.

Baekhyun continues to stare at you for a moment longer before he speaks again.

“Well, think about it now.”

You feel your body tense up with the sudden request. Did you ever have a type? There wasn’t really anyone that caught your attention at the school, and it wasn’t like any of the boys were confessing to you or anything. You supposed someone who was kind, someone who’s stable.

“I like someone who knows what they want. They have to be kind, and patient. I don’t think I’ll date for a while, mostly because no one wants a girl who focuses so much on her studies. I wouldn’t have time to be with them.” You ponder on what you said, pouting your lips. That seemed about right. It made total sense to you too, you wouldn’t want to put someone through pain just because you wanted to spend your time reading books and studying all the time.

Baekhyun seems to have switched to a sour mood then, Jongin also noticing it too. He looks at you and tilts his head towards the sad little puppy, like he’s telling you to comfort him. You weren’t sure why he was telling you to do that. Why should you be comforting him?

“...Hey, did I say something wrong?” You questioned him.

He shakes his head, “No. It’s just interesting. It just seems strange to me that you haven’t thought about it before, especially since we’re seniors. Aren’t you worried you won’t have any experience when you date as an adult?”

You blink. “Not really. I’m sure there’s a lot of adults who haven't dated in their high school years.”

“Huh.”

The conversation ended shortly after that, and the three of you walked back to class. Baekhyun didn’t say a word to you the entire way there, just speaking to Jongin about what video games he liked to play. You silently think about everything that had happened, wondering if you said something wrong. Even though he confirmed with you that everything was fine before you found your seats, your stomach started to twist and turn.

He accompanied you guys on your walk home, leaving a message to his mom that he was going out with some friends. Jongin pulled him aside and let you know that he was going to show Baekhyun his room while you changed out of your school uniform. You nimbly walk to your room and throw your school bag on the ground. You slip out of your clothes and sigh, flopping on your bed.

“What is with him?” You say out loud. You start to count the cracks on your ceiling before sighing and getting back up, your bra and underwear the only thing covering your body. You move to your closet to try and figure out what you’re going to wear.

“You said you wanted some water, right? I’ll be right back.” You hear Jongin’s voice from your window, and you brush your fingers along some dresses that are hung. You then pause, because, wait. Your window was open.

And you were only wearing your bra and your underwear. And if you heard correctly, Jongin was grabbing a cup of water for Baekhyun. You freeze where you’re standing, not daring to look behind you. How were you so dumb to just strip, practically naked, without closing your window?

You spin around, and you’re met with those piercing eyes staring right back at you. He’s just staring, not a hint of emotion on his face. You stop walking towards the window, because you’re still in shock that this is the first time any boy has truly seen you like this. Besides Jongin, but he didn’t count. Instead of moving, you stay in place, but you soon see that you don't have to close your window, because Baekhyun starts to close the curtains from his view, and just like that, he vanishes from your sight.

Your breath starts to rapidly increase, and you could feel your stupid heart beating fast again. You shake your head and run back to your closet, picking out a simple yellow dress. You look down and choose a pair of white trainers.

You met them both outside your house, waiting for you at the door. You shyly walk out, your purse hanging from your shoulder while you shut your door close and lock it. You turn to face the both of them, and give them a big smile.

“Alright, let’s get to the train station!”

Jongin chatters excitedly about what rides are the best, but even with his constant recommendations and outbursts, you couldn’t help but let your mind drift to the window situation that had happened only moments before. Baekhyun just looking at you, staring at your body while you stood there awkwardly. You mentally slapped yourself in the face, wondering if you should have been more expressive. But then he closed the blinds, making sure he wouldn’t be able to see anymore of it. Did he think you were ugly? You twist a strand of hair in your fingers before Jongin snaps you out of your train of thought.

“We’re here, come on.” You didn’t even realize that you had arrived at the station because you were so absorbed in your own head. You board and sit down next to Baekhyun who’s scrolling on his phone. You peek, not trying to be nosy, but he was literally right next to you. You couldn’t help it. Your eyes burn into the screen as you see him typing something in the notes app.

don’t worry, i won’t say anything about it.

You look up at him and he’s already giving you a smile. You let a small, “Mh,” escape from your lips and he winks at you. He begins to erase the sentence and his thumbs start to move quickly on his screen.

you’re really pretty, you know that?

You don’t look up this time, but you could feel his gaze on you. And there it was again, your heart beating against your chest. You wanted to rip it out and tell it to stop giving you a hard time, but instead all you could do in the moment is let out a weird, and muffled, “Oh.”

Your thoughts can’t help but think that he was only saying this because he was able to see you half naked, but you didn’t want to dwell on it. You instead start to drift off for a bit, feeling sleepy. The view of the trees passing by rapidly on the train made you feel tired, and soon enough you had fallen asleep.

“Y/N? We’re here. Y/N?” You wake up to Baekhyun whispering in your ear, and you realize that you had knocked out and leaned against his shoulder. You pick yourself up immediately, leaving the boy next to you to stifle a laugh.

Jongin was already waiting outside, jumping up and down like a little kid. It didn’t take you guys long to get to the park, it was only around a 5 minute walk from the train station. You guys stop at the entrance, each of you pulling out your wallets to grab some money for the admission fee. You were about to hand yours to the man’s awaiting hand, but Baekhyun grabbed it from you and placed a twenty in replacement. He looks back at you and shrugs.

“I owe you for the bread.”

“But that was only 5 dollars!” You exclaimed as you passed through the gate, the lights from the rides coloring your faces.

“It’s fine. If you really care that much, I’ll use the money to get some food. Sounds good?”

You give him a look, and he doesn’t acknowledge it at all, instead turning in front of him and placing his arm around Jongin’s shoulder, asking him which ride you should get on first.

“Definitely the Tilt. There’s always a short line and it’s fucking cool.” You sigh as you follow them to the ride, dragging your feet along the dirt.

As you approached the gate leading to the entrance to the ride, Jongin looked at you and flashes you a large grin. Your heart swells up as you take in his features, the look of pure euphoria plastered in every part of his face, his eyes twinkling at yours. The light pink lights from the ride give his tan skin a subtle glow, and you mouth to him, “Thank you.”

He all but winks at you once the woman leads you to your seat on the ride. It was one of those rides that spun you in a circle, the way you ‘rode’ it was by sitting next to another in a circle, no seatbelts, just your ass on the hard plastic. You sat next to Baekhyun who looked excited, his arms behind yours and Nini. You already knew you were going to feel sick, but seeing your friends so happy reminded you that you were doing this for them.

You feel the ride begin to rise up a couple of feet off the ground, and then it starts to bounce and speed around in a circle. Your hair kept flying in your face, making you spit loose strands from entering your mouth before you let out some blood curdling screams. Everytime the ride would jolt up, so did your body. Your tiny frame would literally jump up a couple of feet and catch some air, your butt getting sore within the first couple of seconds of this horrible, horrible ride.

“I think… I’m going… to be sick!” You yell out.

Jongin turns to you while he’s laughing wildly, and you notice that a girl next to him is holding his arm tightly, her eyes shut tightly as she tries not to fall from her sitting place. That’s surprising, you flash him a look, questioning him. Your heads bob up and down again, the ride throwing your bodies around roughly, and he gives you a gummy smile as he raises his eyebrows. You suddenly feel yourself lunging forward, almost falling into the middle of the devilish contraption, but a strong, warm hand grabs the back of your dress and pushes you close to their body.

You look through your eyelashes as Baekhyun gives you that dazzling smile, his rosy lips capturing your attention. For a couple of seconds, you could feel yourself watching him in slow motion, the wind pushing his hair out of his face, exposing his small forehead. His cheeks cast a pink hue from his left to the right, and you swore that he looked so beautiful. You flash him a nervous grin as he tightens his hand around your shoulder, and the butterflies begin to tap against your stomach.

Soon enough, you find yourself tumbling off the now stopped ride, Jongin and Baekhyun following behind you, laughing to one another. It wasn’t until you turned back around that you noticed that the girl that sat next to Jongin was glued to him, her gaze stuck on your best friend.

“If you guys don’t mind I’m just going to check out some games. We can meet back here in 20 minutes?” Jongin raised his eyebrows at the both of you as he took the girl’s hand in his.

You couldn’t help the laughter from coming out of your mouth as you nod vigorously at him.

“Go for it.”

And just like that, you were alone with Baekhyun again. He swung his hand behind his back, stretching and looking behind you. He opens his mouth and points to something you can’t see, so he grabs your shoulders with his, ‘wow, he has big hands’, and spins you around. You see the staple ferris wheel a couple of meters away from you, and you feel a lump in your throat.

“Want to ride it with me?’’ He asks you sheepishly.

“I’m not good with heights.” You shoot back at him, a frown forming on your face.

“I’ll keep your attention off of it.” Baekhyun grabs your hand and leads you through the crowd of people. You didn’t notice how rough his hands were before… were they calloused? You ponder on it for a little while more until he stops in front of the gate for the ferris wheel.

Luckily, there was no one in line so you were immediately buckled in and secured, the man going over the rules with you two.

“Please don’t shake the cart once you get to the top. And please, no funny business either.”

You blush at the blunt comment, looking at Baekhyun with a look that reads, I’m so embarrassed right now. He chuckled as the man in uniform walked away and stood by the control center, pushing some buttons, and you felt yourself lurch forward as you slowly started to rise forward.

You held your breath as you began to climb up in height, looking down as your feet dangled inside the metal cage. From being able to look at faces in complete detail, now looked like muddied little dots as the ferris wheel brought you closer to the night sky. Your hands began to grip the railing in front of you, your knuckles turning white.

“Are you scared?” Baekhyun snapped you out of your dwindling spiral, his eyes staying on you.

“Just a little. You don’t think I could fall out, right?” You shakily reply.

“There’s no way you could fall out, Y/N. Just relax.”

You take a deep breath, trying to calm yourself down as you finally reach the top. You were so high up that you felt like you could touch the stars if you reached out far enough. The ride churns to a stop, and you look at the stars twinkling above you, the screams and laughter echoing below. You could smell cotton candy and popcorn, and the cool breeze drifted on your face, magically loosening up your nerves.

“I hope I didn’t make you uncomfortable earlier. But I won’t lie, I did look.”

Baekhyun muttered out as you looked at the night sky. Your palms are beginning to sweat.

“It’s okay.” You barely whisper out. But it wasn’t really okay, honestly. Whatever was happening between the two of you was still a mystery, you couldn’t really tell what he thought about you.

He sighs as he diverts his attention on you, and you mimic him.

“I also thought you were pretty before I saw anything too. I just didn’t want to be weird about it since we just met today.” The words slip effortlessly off his tongue, and you feel yourself stutter.

“A-are you always this straightforward?”

“No. Only with you.” You gulp as you maintain your eyes on him.

He reaches forward and brushes his fingers on your cheek, you’re frozen because this was new to you. You’ve never been alone with a boy before, one that you were really, really attracted to. You weren’t sure what to do when you saw him scooting closer to you. His school uniform scrunched against your yellow dress, and you could feel your fingers wrapping around the material of his navy blue blazer.

You suddenly push your hand against his chest, preventing him from getting any closer.

“I’ve never kissed a boy before.” A warm blush creeps on your face, and Baekhyun pauses before he smiles innocently.

“Who said I was going to kiss you? Only perverts think like that.” He smirks at you while you stumble and think carefully with your next words.

“Well I just can’t read you-”

“Why does it matter anyways? If I want to kiss you, I mean. You said that you weren’t interested in anyone. You’re going to wait to date until you’re old and shit.”

His sudden abrasiveness takes you back. One moment he’s teasing you and the next he’s accusing you in a rude manner. You look down towards the amusement park, wondering when the hell they were going to start up the ride again. He places his hand over yours.

“I didn’t mean to be mean. I just don’t understand why you’re so afraid of letting people in. Would it really screw up your goals if you liked someone? You learn to balance those types of things, that’s how life works. You shouldn’t just wait until you finally decide to let it happen; it should flow easily and happen naturally.”

Your fingers twitch under his hand. “Why are your fingers so calloused?”

“Why are you changing the subject?”

You bit your lip nervously. “I don’t like being confronted.”

“I think you need to hear this, Y/N. I’ve been where you’re at. It’s depressing. You just… I’ve never met anyone like you before. That was so similar to me. I don’t want to see you get hurt.”

It’s your turn to get aggravated. “How the hell would I get hurt? I just met you, and you’re acting like you know everything about me.”

“I can see the same pain and burden I carried in you. How wouldn’t I know, Y/N? My father literally forced me to become an isolated piece of shit, all I did for years of my life was follow his orders, to make sure I was perfect to his standards. You’re doing this to yourself, and I’m telling you that it won’t end well for you if you keep it up. I’m trying to protect you.”

You try to fight the tears from falling down your face, but your body betrays you. You feel the warm liquid roll down your cheeks and taste the saltiness in your mouth. You push away his hand and look at him angrily.

“I don’t need you to protect me. I’ve been helping myself for years without anyone else. I’m okay on my own!” You screech at him. He looks at you with a sad smile.

“You’re just okay?”

Your tears are streaming now. “Yeah, I’m just okay.” You hissed out.

He abruptly pulls you in for a hug, and you try to fight him, attempting to push him off of you. Eventually, you realize that he’s stronger than you and there was no point in fighting him. You slouch underneath his touch, his uniform smells like lavender. You breathe it in, and try to control your breathing.

“I just don’t want to fail.” You whisper.

“I know. But life is filled with failure. You can’t expect yourself to excel in everything that you do. That’s exactly what leads to failing.” He combs his fingers through your hair as you sniffle. He pulls you back and looks at you. You could still feel the warmth of your tears on your face, your ears ringing from your crying.

“Baekhyun.”

“Yeah?”

“What’s your type?”

He shoots you a blank stare. “I haven’t really thought about it too much.”

“Well, think about it now.” You say confidently.

He returns a small side smile. “I guess someone like you.”

You don’t say anything back for a moment, looking deep into his eyes.

“You think that because I remind you of yourself. You think you can fix me. Sometimes you can’t do that, Baekhyun. Some people don’t want to change.”

He tries to say something back, but you feel your phone vibrate in your purse. You pull it out while you wipe your nose, reading a text from Jongin.

hey i know that we didn’t get to ride on too many things but i think i’m ready to go home. this girl is weird and keeps trying to kiss me and shit. meet me at the entrance.

As if your prayers were being answered, you felt the ferris wheel jolt back to life. You ride down together in silence, you looking ahead while Baekhyun’s gaze stays on you. Jongin asked why you were so quiet when you found him, but you simply just walked ahead not waiting for either of them.

The train ride was quiet, you sitting next to Jongin while he had his earbuds in. Baekhyun was slumped against a barrier on the right side of you, watching your every movement. The way you adjusted your purse on your shoulder, the way your fingers brushed at the ends of your dress. You didn’t want to think about him for just one moment. But it was useless.

Everything he told you echoed within your head. You just couldn’t stand the way he spoke to you, like he had figured you out. You scolded yourself for thinking that anything good could have happened out of this. You should have just stayed home and studied. Did what you did best. The one thing in your life that didn’t critique you or make you feel bad.

Jongin stated that he was exhausted and wanted to head to bed right away, but not before asking Baekhyun if he wanted to stay the night.

“It’s dark out already. Just stay over. I’m sure your mom wouldn’t be too happy about you walking home when it’s this late.”

Baekhyun shrugged and accepted the invitation. You nod at the both of them and head over to your door, but not before Jongin tells you something.

“I had a lot of fun today, Y/N. Next time let’s stay together.” He winks at you before he runs towards his door and walks inside, leaving it open for Baekhyun.

You stand on your porch, watching as Baekhyun stands on the gravel road looking back at you.

“Can we still be friends?” He asks quietly. The warm air had disappeared now, as if the giddiness of the blossoming romance between the two of you had decided to abandon you. Now all you felt was the cold air cutting knives into your skin.

You tap your feet nervously on the ground. Did you want to be friends with Baekhyun? The both of you knew you harvested some feelings for each other; whatever it was, you couldn’t deny that you were curious and intrigued to see where it would lead you. Maybe not now… but maybe, someday.

“Okay.”

“Okay?” His eyes carried sadness, but you saw how he tried to bring himself to smile.

You nodded. “Just don’t get in the way of my studies.”

He throws his head back to laugh, slapping his hands together. And there it was again, the boy who managed to sneak into your head the moment you first met him. The gentleness that was him, the purity in which he harbored inside his boyish frame, sparkling in front of you.

“As long as you don’t interfere with mine.” He spun around, his feet carrying him towards Jongin’s house. You stayed on the porch until you heard the door close shut. You look up towards the sky, watching the shining stars dance amongst the dark sky. You thought about how they didn’t seem so far to reach when you were on that ferris wheel. But another intruding thought crawled up sneakily, making you stare more intently at the dark canvas above you.

You felt like that because he was there with you. The way impossible scenarios seemed possible when Baekhyun was right by your side. Surely touching stars was something no one would be able to do, they would disintegrate due to the scorching heat. But if you thought hard enough, you felt like if Baekhyun was with you, floating in space in white bulky astronaut attire, that touching stars would be as easy as breathing.

You sighed as you tried to turn your brain off for the rest of the night. Dragging your purse on the hallway floor, you pause in front of your mother’s room. You look at the crack at the bottom of the white chipped door, noticing that her lights were turned off. You didn’t bother saying goodnight, you were too tired. Mentally and physically.

You got yourself ready for bed, pulling out some sweats and a baggy tee shirt. You reach your vanity, to start taking off your makeup. Once you were finished with that, you rose up to close your open window frames, but you stopped when you looked across from you.

Baekhyun was looking up at the sky, his arms resting underneath his chin, placed on the base of the window. He catches you staring, and he waves his hand toward you loosely. You wave back, your gaze on him softening. He offers a small smile before he speaks.

“You’re really pretty, Y/N.” It comes out as a whisper, something that your ears shouldn’t have picked up on, but they did. All you could do was focus on him in this cherished moment. The way you both looked at each other filled with longing and curiosity.

“Goodnight, Baekhyun.” You slowly close your window and bring your hands to drape your curtains shut.

For some reason, you slept soundly that night. Despite everything that had happened, you felt like everything was going to change for you. In the best way possible. You didn’t know if it was because of Baekhyun, but you were eager to find out. For once, your determination wasn’t only set on the goals you had set for yourself for years, but you found yourself etching in the sweet boy who called you pretty in the back of your mind.

-

The rest of the school year would be filled with the three of you becoming closer than ever. Going to the amusement park was only one of the fun things you would do, you went to Haeundae beach even after saving up some money from working at the bakery with your mother during summer break. You went to movies, shopped, studied even. And throughout all of it, you felt yourself fall harder for Baekhyun.

You confessed to Jongin that you harbored feelings for him after a couple of months into the friendship, and he wasn’t exactly shocked.

“Oh yeah like that’s a surprise.” He was laying on your bed with a facial mask on, his tan skin poking out in some places.

You sat at the edge of your bed, trying to pat in the serum from yours. You huff at him as you spin your body to face him, crossing your legs together.

“I just don’t think I should pursue anything. But at the same time I do,” You throw your hands in the air and slam them against your bed, “I don’t know what to do!”

Jongin sighed as he sat himself up. “Your grades haven’t dropped; not even one percent. In fact, your grades have stayed the same since we started hanging out with him. And we only study like twice a week now. Don’t you get it? Spending more time for yourself doesn’t get in the way of your success, Y/N.”

You did have straight A’s in all your classes, and you hated to admit that it felt good to finally have some extra time for yourself. Plus, Baekhyun really helped you organize your notes and gave you some study tips whenever you hung out. He was practically tied with you in terms of top students in your grade. You push Jongin down on the bed as you lay down with him. Your bodies sprawled out next to each other on your light pink bed sheets. You stared up at your ceiling.

“He hasn’t made a move on me once. I think he only thinks of me as a friend. I told you about the night we went to the amusement park for the first time, right?” You press.

“Only like a thousand times.” You punch him lightly as you chuckle.

He turns his body to face you and looks at you sternly. “It’s pretty obvious that he likes you, Y/N. He talks about you all the time when he comes over.”

You try to fight the smile from coming on your face and continue to stare at your white, cracked ceiling. It was your first time liking someone before. You never would have guessed that people were right about having your first crush, how they change everything for you. It seemed cheesy, and you never wanted to be like that. But now, you look forward to your daily hangouts, the little trips you planned together, the study ‘dates’.

“Well, I can’t start anything even if I wanted to. High school is going to end in a couple months and I have to get ready for University.”

Jongin just groans as he takes his face mask off and gets off the bed, heading straight to your bathroom. You stay there, lying on your bed, thinking about your future. If Baekhyun was going to be in it. You really hoped he would.

-

It was a couple of days before your high school graduation, and you had waited until all the letters from the schools you sent applications for had been delivered to your house. You applied to three schools, and with a blood curdling scream in your room, you opened up a letter from Seoul National University, the most prestigious one out of all your applications, congratulating you on your acceptance.

Jongin heard your noise from his window and you barely got out any words other than a distorted, “I got in!”. He had run over and started jumping with you and laughing. Sadly, Jongin had got accepted to Sejong University, but it wasn’t a bad thing. You would be able to see each other everyday still considering they were close to one another.

Jongin had texted Baekhyun to head over to your house, telling him to bring any acceptance letters of his own. Within 10 minutes, he was over at your house, trembling as he showed you guys four letters.

He was wearing some gray sweatpants and a black fitted tee shirt, his hair was in a disarray like he had just woken up. He was extremely nervous, he looked forward to this day just as much as you did, maybe even more.

“I don’t think I can open it. You do it for me, Y/N!” He closed his eyes as he shoved them into your hands, and you took them happily. The two of you discussed what your dream schools were previously, and his being the same as yours. Seoul National. Your fingers grazed upon each one, until you stopped and found it.

Your eyes darted between the two of them as you started to open it up, sliding the paper out and unfolding it slowly. You were…

“...I-I’m sorry Baekhyun. You didn’t get into Seoul National.”

Disappointed.

He opened his eyes and his demeanor changed completely. His focus being on your hands, the letter in your grasp. He slumped his shoulders and dropped onto the ground, his hands gripping, grappling on anything he could get his hands on. He settled on a stray tee shirt you left there, and he tightened it in his grip. You could see tears threatening to fall from his eyes.

“I…I didn’t get in.”

You and Jongin looked at each other with worry, and you both dropped down to Baekhyun’s level. Your friend put his hand on his shoulder, rubbing it in circles.

“Hey, it’s okay. You still have three other letters to look at. Getting into Seoul National is really, really, hard to do. Don’t beat yourself up.” Baekhyun didn’t even look up at him, just numbly nodded his head.

You look at Jongin, ushering him to take his hand off. He complied and stood up, resting his hands on his neck as he walked around your room. You turn your attention to Baekhyun, who still is in a state of shock.

“Hey. It’s going to be okay. You tried your best and that’s all that matters. Weren’t you the one who told me that life is filled with failures? This is only one of them, and I know that it won’t be the last.” He looked up at you, looking confused.

“Is that supposed to make me feel better?” He scoffed.

You sigh. “What I mean is… this is just a single defeat. But it’s not the final one. You keep going. You still have more letters to open up, I know that you applied to Korea University. That’s still top three.”

You look at the remaining letters in your hand and pull out an envelope with ‘Korea University’ printed in red letters. You hand it over to him. He shakily takes it, one hand ripping open the top of it. He pulls out the dull white paper, his eyes scanning each word on the page. He looks up at you, dropping it on the ground. Your eyes are frantic, you grab the paper hastily and bring it to your attention.

Dear Student,

Congratulations! You have been accepted to Korea University! Go online to finish up the process…

You didn’t bother reading the rest as you pulled Baekhyun’s shirt and gave him a hug. You could feel him hiccuping against you, his arms scrambling to pull you in closer. You close your eyes as you rest your face into the crook of his neck, rubbing your hands on his back. Jongin came over and picked the letter off the ground as well, and you hear him starting to jump.

“You got in! That’s so awesome, man!”

That day, the three of you celebrated each of your successes. So what did it call for? Alcohol. Lots and lots of alcohol. You went down to the supermarket your mother worked at, the two men distracting her by talking about their acceptances while you snuck some bottles of soju. You made sure to leave some money on a conveyor belt before you tiptoed out of the store, waving your hands to the both of them.

“Oh, thank you again! We have to go now!” Baekhyun smiled at your mother before he grabbed her face with both hands and kissed her cheek. Your eyes widened at that, before you started to laugh out loud, almost dropping the bottles. Your mother heard this, and started to turn her head towards you.

Jongin took that chance to also grab her face, a smile brightly displayed on his face.

“Sorry for this!” He kissed your mother on the lips this time, earning a muffled, “Jongin!” from her.

The two boys ran out with you, laughter escaping into the night. You decided to go to Jongin’s house since no one was home and drank each to your heart’s content. At first you were nervous since it was your first time drinking, thinking your friends would have to babysit you. But to your surprise, and happiness, you were all light weights.

Jongin slurred as he tried to dance on his bed, legs wobbling causing his mattress to shake.

“To Y/N!” To which you raised your bottle to him, your face warm with happiness. “To Baekhyun!”

He yelled out next, raising his bottle to the sky, his head down while closing his eyes. He took another chug of his drink and hissed at the taste.

Baekhyun chimed along with you with laughter, taking a swig of his own bottle. You look at him under your drunken haze and smile. His face was so red, and he couldn’t stop laughing. You didn’t think you’d ever seen him this content before. You scooted closer to him on the floor while Jongin continued to dance to the music in his head.

“How are you?” You manage to get out. Everything was spinning right now, and you swore each time you tried to keep your eyes focused on Baekhyun, it was processing in your head a second late.

He stretched while he replied to you. “Really good. How are you doing?”

“Great.” You place your drink on the ground while you shake your head at yourself. Never would you have thought you’d be drinking in celebration of getting accepted to your dream school.

“Thank you for telling me that stuff earlier. It really helped.” Baekhyun mumbled out.

You turn your head and give him a thumbs up, giggling. “Of course. I knew you would get accepted into a good school. You’re so smart, probably smarter than me.”

“Oh come on… there’s no way. You got into Seoul National.”

You shrug. “Couldn’t have done it without you. You helped me study for the finals.”

Everything happened so fast, you just remember that you were looking at your drunk friend dancing on the bed, your heart swelling up at the sight of it. Then suddenly, you felt a pair of hands grabbing your shoulders and pulling you. A pair of lips ghosting over yours, and then, finally touching.

Byun Baekhyun had kissed you.

In your memory, you thought you had kissed him back. But maybe that’s just what you wanted to do in that moment. You let him kiss you for a second longer, until you push him off, your arms feeling like noodles. He looked back at you in surprise, his mouth agape with his face entirely flushed pink. He raised his hands up in defense.

“I-I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to-” He suddenly puked on the floor, his back hunched in the air as he attempted to cover his mouth. He awkwardly stood up and ran to Jongin’s hallway, shutting the bathroom door behind him. You sit there for a moment, dizzily trying to recollect what had just happened to you right then, because, did Baekhyun just kiss you?

You shouldn’t have gotten angry. You look back at it and want to scream at yourself to not be mad. But you were young and drunk, you just had your first kiss, and you weren’t even prepared for it. You didn’t have it happen to you when you were sober, and it wasn’t even asked as a question. You always imagined that you would have your first kiss in a romantic, and touching manner. This was not how it was supposed to happen.

You look at Jongin, who was frozen standing on his bed. He was looking towards the bathroom door that had just been slammed shut. He looks back at you, a smile crawling onto his face.

“He… he kissed you! Oh my god, I can’t believe he did that.” He laughed as he plopped his ass on the bed, making him spill some of his drink on the covers. You felt your face heat up, and you stood up from your place on the cold floor. You could start to smell the throw up and it was making you nauseous.

You made your way to the bathroom, hearing Baekhyun groaning on the other side. Your chest feels tight, and you can’t help the anger from rising in you. Maybe it was because you were drunk, maybe if you had been sober you wouldn’t have said what you said. But it happened, and you couldn’t change the past.

Your hand grips the shiny doorknob, your fingers slipping and trying to get a good enough handle on it. You swing it open, and see Baekhyun sprawled on the floor with the toilet seat up. You could smell the alcohol on him, and you swore you were going to puke your insides up too. Instead, you walk towards him, accidentally tripping over the rug on the tile. You hit the ground with your knees, making you groan in pain. He picks his head up at that and looks at you alarmed.

“Y/N! I’m so sorry, I wasn’t thinking and it just happened and-”

You slapped him. Tears run down your cheeks and you drop your hand to your side. Baekhyun sits there, his expression more sober than it was just seconds ago.

You let the tears fall, you didn’t care. You were drunk and angry, and you just had your first fucking kiss. Nothing was going on through your head right then other than fury.

“You can’t just kiss me,” You hiccuped, “without asking me. When I’m… I-I’m drunk! You can’t do that to me when I like you so much.”

You suddenly put your hand to cover your mouth. You couldn’t believe you just confessed to him.

He gets up quickly, crawling towards you like a baby. “You… you like me?”

You squeak, your hands still covering your mouth. If you weren’t so angry then, you probably would have kissed him again. The way his lips were puckered and pink, you couldn’t believe that a moment ago they had been on top of yours.

“No! No, this is good! I like you too, Y/N!” He starts to smile at you, but you shake your head.

“What I’m saying is, you shouldn’t have done that.” You said pissed off.

He gives you a confused stare. “But if we like each other… Why did it matter?”

You let out a frustrated groan, your hands balling into fists.

“Because I didn’t want to have my first kiss like that. You know what, if you can’t understand that, then fuck you.”

You get up from the floor and push your way out of the door, your feet leading you to the front door of Jongin’s house. Your eyes are pounding against your face, and you swore that this was the worst migraine you ever had in your life. You slipped on the shoes you left by the door and reached your hand on the knob. But another hand beats you to it, and you hastily look behind you.

“You can’t just say that, Y/N. What about my feelings? Why are you acting like I did something horrible?” Baekhyun spits at you, and he was definitely more sober than you were. You slam your fists on his chest, tears flying everywhere.

“Just. Stop! Fuck you! I don’t want to be with you.” He lets go of the door handle this time, and you make sure to take advantage of that. You push the door open and race out into the dark.

“Y/N!” Baekhyun yells at you.

You turn around, exhausted and drunk. He just gives you a look, similar to how he did the day he had seen you half naked. There was no emotion on his face, it just felt… empty.

“Stop running away. Stop making problems for yourself. You’re right when you said I could see myself in you. That I can’t change you.” He walks down the steps carefully, like he’s trying to coax a wild animal back to it’s cage.

“But I know that you can’t change your feelings for me. And I know that I want to keep these feelings for you. Just… come back inside. Let me apologize. You don’t mean what you said.”

His lips were shaking, and you could see that he was being honest. That he wanted to make this work, whatever it was. You give him a somber smile, your arms swinging by each side of your body in defeat.

“I meant it.” You gulped, the words float into the night, along with any emotions you had.

You walk back to your house. You make sure to shut your windows and close your blinds before slipping into your bed. It was cold, and the blankets didn’t help your shivering state. All you wanted to do was sleep, and forget everything that had just happened.

But you would come to see the next day that it was definitely not forgotten, when you noticed that Baekhyun wasn’t with Jongin the next morning.

-

You had woken up with a hangover, groaning as you stumbled into your best friend’s house. It was Sunday, and tomorrow would be your graduation. You had all agreed that you would go back to the amusement park that day, to go back to the place where it all started for you guys.

“Where’s… Baekhyun?” You wince as you press a finger to your temple, Jongin sitting on his desk looking at his laptop. His back was turned away from you.

“He’s not coming.” Jongin says coldly.

You frown. “What do you mean he’s not coming? Why not?”

He spins around in his chair, dark circles underneath his eyes as he gives you a disapproving look. “You don’t remember what happened last night?”

You shake your head. You had only remembered walking back to your house, and how cold it was.

He sighs as he brings his head into his hands. “You guys kissed. And you got pissed off. Why, I don’t know. You fucking like him. You told him you didn’t want to be with him, and probably said ‘fuck you’ like… twice?”

You sit on the bed, not saying a word.

“What is wrong with you, Y/N?”

You didn’t listen to that, didn’t ponder on that. Because all that mattered to you was that Baekhyun wasn’t here, and it was all your fault. Why did you get so angry? What the fuck happened last night… and what the fuck was wrong with you?

Jongin tried to call out to you as you ran out of his room. You ignored him. You ran from his house all the way to Baekhyun’s, you didn’t have any shoes on since you didn’t think you’d be doing any of this. You didn’t fucking remember.

As you pant and try to catch your breath when you reach his house, you put your hands on your knees and try to keep your heart from exploding out of your chest. You walk up towards the light blue house, down the cobbled pathway. Your feet hurt, and you could feel small pebbles and debris stuck against the bottom of them. But you didn’t care, you wanted to feel that pain, anything right now. Because you were so afraid if you didn’t say the right thing you wouldn’t feel anything anymore.

You knocked on the door, your hands quickly pushing the strands of hair that stuck to your forehead from the sweat. You didn’t hear anything for a moment until the door swung open. You’re met with Baekhyun’s mother, a sweet woman that you had come to adore. Her eyes reminded you of his, kind and patient.

She looked you up and down, confused.

“Y/N. Are you okay?” Her quiet voice rings out in the silence, and you bite your lip.

“Hello, Ms.Byun. Is Baekhyun home? I need to talk to him.”

She nods her head. “He’s in his room. I think he’s still sleeping. You’re welcome to go and see him.”

You thank her and bow before you quickly walk inside, the house decorated minimally, a few photo frames with Baekhyun, his mother and father. You don’t stop to look at them, instead walking down the hall where his room was. You’re about to open the door before you stop in your tracks. Your hand hovering over the doorknob. What were you even going to say? Your heart is beating faster than ever and you tap your foot nervously, trying to muster up the courage to go inside. But fate decides for you instead.

The door swings open to Baekhyun’s eyes, boring into yours. He looks like he hadn’t slept, his eyes are bloodshot like he had pulled an allnighter. His hair was going in different directions, and you could see some feathers placed sparsely in between tufts of it.

“What?” He says shortly.

Your mouth hangs open, but nothing comes out.

He goes to shut his door again, and you put your foot out to stop it.

“I- I need to talk to you.” You sputter.

He rolls his eyes and leaves the door open, walking back inside his room. You step inside, closing the door behind you. You notice some pillows on his bed were completely destroyed, rips made in them and feathers placed all over his sheets. You grimace as you look around some more. He had posters sprawled against his white wall, all of them of the singer Rain. As you look at his wall some more you notice a lone photo pinned on there, something you definitely didn’t see before as of late.

It was a picture of the two of you, Baekhyun’s arm around your shoulder as you smiled into the camera Jongin was using to snap the shot. As you looked more intently, you saw how Baekhyun wasn’t looking in the same direction you had, he was looking adoringly at you; a smile on his face. You were standing in front of the beach you guys had gone to a while back, and you don’t even realize you’re smiling until a voice snaps you out of thoughts.

“What are you doing here?” He’s sitting on his bed, his legs hanging off the side of it.

You look back at him. “I wanted to say I’m sorry for whatever I said last night.”

He stares at you with a blank expression before he scoffs with a smile on his face.

“Whatever you said? You don’t remember?” You shake your head, and Baekhyun’s eyes trail off your face, looking at his desk.

“You told me to fuck off, basically. You got mad at me for kissing you. Oh yeah, and you also told me you liked me. Not specifically in that order, but yeah.” His tone was sharp, and you felt each word stabbing into you, making you feel small.

“I’m sorry-”

“No. You don’t get to say you’re sorry. You were right. You aren’t going to change. Because you’re too hung up on being perfect, well news flash, Y/N, you’re fucking not. You hurt people around you because you’re too caught up in yourself. You don’t let people in because you’re just so fucking scared all the time. You don’t even come to think of what good things could happen to you if you just stop thinking about yourself for once!” He stood up and swung his hand over his desk, sending books flying to the ground as he fumed at you. He walked up and got right in your face.

“Want to know something, Y/N?” His lips are inches away from yours, and you try to stop yourself from shaking. He looks into your eyes, waiting for a reply, but you don’t say anything.

“I like you.” Your body stills, and his face stays where it’s at, not moving.

“But, fuck you.”

Your eyes sting. You feel your heart breaking.

“You… you don’t mean that.” You say broken.

He smiles at you and scoffs. “I fucking meant it. Get out.”

He turns away from you and sits on his bed. You stand there for a couple more seconds before you rush out of his door, running back to your home. His mother tried to stop you, asking you what happened, but you just said you were sorry. You spent the entire day moping in your room, not bothering to let your mother come in even though she yelled at you to unlock your door. You didn’t want to see anyone, you were crushed.

You weren’t happy when you walked on the stage in your high school stadium the next day. You didn’t bother smiling at your mother as you shook hands with your principal as he handed you your diploma. Jongin tried to cheer you up by taking you out to eat afterwards, the two of you sitting in silence as you stared numbly at the noodles placed in front of you.

“You’re going to be okay.” He kept repeating to you. But it didn’t matter. You weren’t going to be okay. Because you just ruined your chances with someone that you wanted to be in your life forever. You wanted Baekhyun, but you were so full of yourself that your old ways came back to destroy any chances. You were completely, and utterly, broken.

-

But that was 6 years ago. You were 23 now, and you graduated from university 2 years ago. You had made somewhat of a name for yourself as the CEO of a company you had started. It was based around the stock market. You were a multi millionaire, constantly in the press and being talked about. You stayed friends with Jongin, who ended up becoming famous as a choreographer for Korean groups, and even for western entertainment.

Your life was exactly what you wanted it to be, the way you wanted it to be since you were younger. Your mother lived in a luxurious house that you paid for yourself in the very heart of Seoul, and she didn’t have to worry about working anymore. You made sure of that. She claimed that she didn’t need any of that, that she was fine where she used to live. But you wouldn’t accept that.

“Mom, I told you I would take care of you when I was older. Now I am. Please accept this and don’t complain to me anymore.” You sat across from her in the restaurant you got a reservation for. It had taken you multiple phone calls and whining to her to even accept going there with you, months, just because she stated it was too, ‘fancy’.

She took a sip of water before placing it down. “How’s Jongin doing?”

You smile as you pick at your food. “Good. We see each other everyday since he’s staying in Korea for the time being. He went to LA for a while to help some back-up dancers for a well known artist.”

Your mother nodded. “What about that other friend of yours, what was his name?”

You stop picking at your food, and you look back up at her.

“Baekhyun?” You hadn’t thought about him for years. After the big fight you had, he had left straight after graduation. Not bothering to say goodbye to you, he just packed his things and went on his way. But it wasn’t like you made any effort to get in contact with him, you were so hurt that you tried to erase any memories of him.

Her eyes brightened. “Yes! Baekhyun. His mother called me not too long ago, she said he’s a successful CEO of a music company.”

That, you didn’t know. You always assumed Baekhyun would do something great, he was smart. You knew he was capable of anything he put his mind to, and you found yourself smiling at your food as you thought of him running a music company. It was perfect, it fit him. You could still remember him singing to you in the hallway of your school the first time you met him. And oh. You could still remember how much you liked him.

“That’s good. Good for him.” You let a dry cough out, and you place your fork down to smooth out your black blazer. You had gotten off of work only two hours ago, so you didn’t have time to switch out of your ‘big girl clothes’, as Jongin would say. You would laugh at him and say your two piece suits were comfortable and made you look important.

“Why don’t you ever go see him? Whatever happened to him, Y/N?” Your mother pressed.

“Nothing happened. He just… we got into a fight.” You state in a monotone voice.

Your mother looks at you softly.

“You know ever since your father left, you always took care of me. You were my sweet, hard working girl. But I never saw you ever take care of yourself. It broke my heart.”

You look at her sentimentally. “But I did take care of myself. I hung out with Jongin-”

“But no one else helped you more than that other boy. I had never seen you so happy. Please,” She takes your hand in yours, and you purse your lip, “you have everything you could ever want now. Can’t you look into the things that your heart truly wants?”

You feel your chest cave in, your heart clenching as you let tears drop down.

“Y-yes, mom.” She does nothing but smile at you, continuing to hold your hand.

“Now. Why don’t you call him? Go and see him right now.” You look at her stunned.

“I just got you to have dinner with me at this restaurant for months, and you’re telling me to leave? You didn’t even order any food yet, mom.” You couldn’t help but laugh.

She releases your hand and waves you off. “It’s too much money. I have some food I made at home. It’s healthier anyways. I’ll call myself a cab. Just go.”

And that was all you needed to hear, really. You kissed your mother goodbye and headed to your car. You pull your phone out of your purse and scroll until you reach your best friend’s contact information.

“Hello?” Jongin’s voice rang out.

You smiled at the sound of his voice. “Hey. I had a question.”

You could hear some rustling on the other end, and guessed that he was in bed.

“Ah… this couldn’t have waited until morning? I was about to fall asleep.”

“I was wondering if you knew Baekhyun’s number.”

Silence.

“Baekhyun? You haven’t spoken about him in years, Y/N. Why do you want it?”

You could picture him with a confused look on his face, his lips protruding in a pout.

You sigh. “I just… I want to talk to him. See how he’s doing. Do you have it?”

“No.” You felt yourself sink into the seat of your car.

“But his mother calls me every now and then. She talks to me since he’s busy most of the time, and doesn't see her as much. She knows I still hang out with him.”

“You do?” You question.

“Uh… yeah. Just because you two ended things didn’t mean we did. I don’t have his number because he changes it so often. I usually just wait for him to call me. I’ll give you his mother’s number if you want.”

You nod to yourself, your confidence making a comeback.

“Yes. Text it to me. Bye Nini.”

“Hey-” You hung up your phone and waited for the three little dots to appear in your messages. As soon as he sent the number, you clicked on it and raised the phone to your ear.

Your heart was beating against your chest, a feeling you didn’t really experience too often, something that only occured when you were a silly and immature girl. You hear the line ring multiple times and you feel like she wasn’t going to pick up. You start to drag your phone down until you hear a small,

“Hello?”

You almost drop your phone as you listen to the woman’s voice.

“Ms. Byun?” You whisper.

“Yes, that’s me. May I ask who’s calling?”

“It’s me. Y/N.” Your fingers are starting to sweat, and you wondered why you felt like you had just finished jogging a marathon. It wasn’t like you were talking to Baekhyun himself.

“Y/N! Oh it’s so nice to hear from you. What can I do for you?”

“You too! I was wondering if you had Baekhyun’s phone number?” You tapped your foot near the gas pedal in your car, your other hand thumping against the wheel.

She paused for a moment. “I don’t have his number. But he’s actually home right now! He came to visit me.”

“He’s… back home? Like our childhood neighborhood?” You say confused.

“Yes! He’s such a hard working boy. He runs his own company now, you know. But he’s not home at this exact moment… I think he told me he was going to see the school.”

That was all you needed to know.

“Thank you so much. I have to go now, Ms.Byun.”

“Of course. Please, call me whenever you’d like.”

You thank her again, and you throw your phone into the seat next to you. You start up your car and quickly start to head back home.

-

You managed to get there in a mere 30 minutes, probably less if you had decided to speed up a little more. You did your best to get there in one piece, you were so terrified of going back here again. The place that you left with awful memories, ones that you tried to escape from. You looked at the time on your phone before you exited your car; 7:30. As you park in an empty parking lot, you step out and look across the humble and small streets. You can remember walking along them, and you can visualize you and Jongin walking, laughing as he gave you a funny face.

You smile, and suddenly the two of you disappear from your eyes. You start to walk down until you reach the town’s small center of restaurants and such. You pause in front of the bakery you used to frequent everyday, and you look into the window with surprise that they’re open. You open up the glass door, a bell ringing as it closes behind you.

A young woman stands at the register, powder on her cheek. You offer her a smile while she looks back at you in shock.

“Oh my god. You’re Y/N. I see you on tv all the time!” She looked around 18 or so, and you nod back at her.

“Yeah. You have something on your face,” You point to her cheek, and she blushes, wiping off the white substance, “Can I have some sweet bread?”

“Of course!” She leaves the register and pulls out the packaged bread, and before you reach out to get it, you ask her something.

“Can I get two of them actually?” You grin.

“O-Of course! Here, it’s on the house. We’re about to close anyway.”

You take the loaves and shake your head. You pull out a fifty dollar bill and hand it over to her.

“Thank you for being so nice. Have a good night.” She starts to say something but you quickly make your way out, giggling to yourself as you walk down the streets you used to know so well.

And there you were, finally. Standing under the pale moonlight of your school. It had received quite the makeover since you had last seen it, the buildings painted a blinding white coat, accented with dark blue pieces. You stepped past the gate, looking around in amazement. You didn’t think about this place for 6 years, and now you’re back. And you can feel yourself starting to shy back into the stubborn and fragile girl you used to be.

It wasn’t until you looked towards the field that your heart began to stop beating. A small figure sitting on the bench, looking up towards the sky. You knew who it was, and you didn’t think you could move your legs to go and approach him.

“What am I doing?” You asked yourself. You look at the two loaves of bread in your hands, and you start to hyperventilate.

Sure, you had the drive and determination to get here and try and see him, but in the back of your head you were wishing and hoping he wouldn’t be here. So you didn’t have to get your heart broken all over again. You never did date like you had thought you would, instead you once again focused completely on your studies. It wasn’t like you wanted to date either. Because no one would ever compare to him.

“Hello?” A deep voice shouted out towards you. Your feet begin to scramble, wanting to look for a place to hide yourself, but you try to control them.

You take a deep gulp. “Hi!” You wave the two loaves of bread in the air, and you can see the man look confused. He puts his hands over his eyes, like a pair of binoculars. You could see his eyes widen in surprise, and then a smile erupts on his face. He suddenly starts to run over to you, and you find yourself doing the same thing.

Your black heels are stomping on the concrete and the heels of your feet are screaming in pain, but you didn’t mind that. In fact, you start to smile, because it’s been so long since you felt anything. The two of you stop, breathing hard in front of each other. He was wearing a white collared button up and some black slacks. His once black hair was dyed a chocolate brown. His lips still maintained the dusty pink you would fantasize about kissing in your bedroom as a teenager. His face was slimmed down, and you notice that he lost a lot of weight since you had last seen him. Not that he was chubby or anything when you were younger but, he felt more like a real man now.

“Hi.” He says raspily. His eyes glowed towards you, and your cheeks were hurting from how hard you were smiling.

“Hey.”

He looks down at your hands that carried the bread. He lets out a hearty laugh, clapping his hands together before looking back up to you, pink erupting on his own cheeks.

“I can’t believe you got some. When I first got back here two days ago I was practically living off of them. They’re just as good as the first time you gave it to me.”

You did nothing but give him a warm smile as you handed over the loaf, gently touching the knuckles of his hand. You could feel the electricity burn in your body as he lingered for a second longer, then retracting his hand completely.

“Um… how are you doing? I’m sorry this is so weird-” He pulled you in for a hug, and your hands hung by either side of you, one clutching the bread tightly.

“I missed you.” He whispers in your ear.

You regain consciousness from the abrupt interaction and close your eyes and lean into his touch. You wrap your arms around his back and take a deep breath, smelling his clothes. It smelled like lavender, and you giggled. He feels the vibration of your laughter and chuckles into your hair, one hand holding the back of your head.

“What’s so funny?” He mumbled.

“You still use the same laundry detergent since high school?”

“Hey, it smells good. It makes my clothes really soft too.” He pulls back and gives you a toothy grin. “You still remember what I used to smell like? What are you, a pervert or something?”

You blush, trying to maintain your cool. “I’m no pervert. I just come to appreciate when a man smells good.”

You trail past him, walking towards the bench that he was seated on not too long ago. He takes a place next to you, and you could feel the warmth where you sat, he must have been here for a while, you thought.

He places his loaf next to him on the bench and turns his head to look at you, his eyes painted with curiosity.

“How did you find me?” He asked you.

“I uh, got into contact with Nini and asked him for your number. But he didn’t have it. So I got your mother’s number and she told me you were here.” You kind of just blurted it out, your nerves getting the best of you. You felt like you were in high school all over again, becoming a blubbering mess in front of your first love.

“You’re like a stalker or something.” He laughs. He stretched his hands out as he cracked his fingers, and your eyes didn't miss how he pushed his sleeves past his forearm, exposing the  bulging veins protruding from his carved muscled arms. You gulp.

“I just felt like I needed to see you. Talk about things.” You look towards the field, it still maintained its healthiness even after all those years.

“Well, I run my own company now. BBH Entertainment. That’s been going good. One of the groups I oversee is on the top of Billboard every time they release an album. They’re pretty popular. To be honest, I kind of have been doing okay actually. Okay, scratch that, I’ve been terrible.” He chuckles weakly and looks up at the sky.

“You’ve been doing good, from what I’ve seen though. Ms.Millionaire over here.” He nudges your foot with his, and you shake your head.

“It’s nothing. I just studied my ass off in school. Managed to get everything set up and fate did the rest for me. But I can say I’ve been doing the same as well. Terrible.” You sigh as you put your head on the palms of your hand. You frown looking over at him, giving him a look.

“Why have you been doing terrible?” You pester at him.

Baekhyun takes a deep breath before shrugging. “I just kind of reverted back into my old ways. I guess you kind of rubbed off on me. When I got into school I just went into study mode, it was like that all four years. I barely went out, didn’t talk to anyone. I was depressed. I guess I brought that along with me to my job. I’ve been ignoring and avoiding the people in my life for a while now, this is the first time I’ve seen my mom in like… 5 years.”

He counted five fingers on his hand before he sighs and drops it back down. You couldn’t help but to relate to him. You also spent all your time working, not bothering to give yourself some very much needed relaxation. You found the more time you spent alone and not keeping yourself occupied, the more you started to think about the past. Just like how you did earlier that evening, after you got off of work before coming to the restaurant. It was truly depressing, knowing how lonely you were.

“I feel the same way. I kind of blocked everyone out. I see my mom every now and then. I got her a house in the city so she was closer to me and I didn’t have to commute over here for… reasons.” You trail off on your last sentence, the memory of the fight you had with Baekhyun resurfacing.

He hesitantly puts his hand over yours on the bench, your hand flinches for a moment before you let him hold it.

“...I’m sorry. For how I handled things back then, Y/N.” His voice is laced with sadness, and your throat hitches as you watch him speak.

“I was so angry. That night. I didn’t understand why you got so mad at me when I kissed you. It took me a while to understand… to see things from your perspective. I shouldn’t have done that. Regardless of us drinking and shit. As an angsty and horny teenager my body reacted on impulse, and I apologize.” You tighten your hand over his and smile weakly.

“It’s fine. I shouldn’t have cussed you out. I shouldn’t have said any of those things to you, I just…” You pause as you try to form the right words, “I was scared. I was scared of being with you and thinking that if we dated then I wouldn’t put all my focus into school. That I would fail and ruin any chance of becoming successful. But I put my needs first when it came to us. When it came to you. I was selfish. I’m sorry.”

He looks at you, and you do the same. The moon cast a glow on his face, highlighting his cheekbones and nose. You blink, and suddenly you’re looking at a younger Baekhyun, one in a school uniform, his black hair covering his forehead and giving you a grin. Your heart pounds, and you don’t stop yourself from reaching your hand out and touching his cheek. You let your fingers tenderly graze his face, memorizing each detail of it.

He grabs your hand that was on his cheek and holds it tightly. You purse your lips and look into his eyes, searching for something, anything.

“You know, I've never met someone like you. After all these years, you were the only person I thought about.” Baekhyun softly says.

You blink gingerly, “I… me too.”

The blood rushes to your face and warms your entire body, and you could see the pink tint appearing on his as well. He keeps a hold of your hand on his face before he asks you faintly.

“Can I kiss you, Y/N?”

“Yes.”

Just like that his lips are crashing onto yours, and you press up against him, your chest clashing with his. His lips are soft, and they taste like berries, they continue to put pressure against yours. You raise one of your hands to tangle into his soft locks, and he brings his right hand over your neck, controlling your head movement to match his pace while he kisses you.

You feel his left hand grabbing your waist, and something begins to build up inside of you. That feeling you only got whenever you would please yourself in your room late at night. The thoughts of your first crush only appeared to you whenever you had closed your eyes… he was here in front of you right now. Kissing you.

You pull back from him, a string of salvia following your movement, dripping down from your lip. He eyes that carefully, and you could see the look in his eyes change from something innocent to pure lust. You felt the similar feeling washing over you as well, but something inside of you told you to tell him before anything would transpire.

“I just wanted to say… I like you so much, Baekhyun,” Your voice shakes as you speak.

“I always have, and stop me if I say something wrong but over the years, I never wanted to say it because I was terrified of the thought that I had lost you… but I loved you. I think I always did.” The confidence you tried to emit while saying that didn’t exactly come out like how you hoped, but it came out more vulnerable, raw.

Baekhyun just shook his head as he pushed your head closer to yours, your noses touching as he gripped your face with both hands.

“No, I always loved you too. I always will, Y/N. God, you don’t know how long I wanted to say that to you. No idea.” He looks back down on your lips, and aggressively kisses you for the second time that night.

It started off rough, and it only got dirtier after that. He began to slip his tongue past your lips, begging for more, to be inside of you. You accept his request, circling your tongues together, your lips grazing one another as you both try to fight for dominance. He pecks your lips as he retracts his tongue, moving his attention to your neck. You expose it to him with ease, your arms wrapping around his neck as a string of moans slide out from your throat.

“I want to…” He huffs against your skin, biting lightly, “make love to you. Right now.”

Your stomach starts to do back flips, the place between your thighs beginning to beat. You couldn’t help but start to rub your legs together, looking for some friction to satisfy your neediness. You shake your head speedily.

“Okay. Yeah. Yes.” You breathe out. He removes his lips from your throat, and you realize he had begun to suck on the skin there, you could feel the soreness from the hickey he had just given you. The thought that you would be able to proudly display that fueled a stronger desire to let him ravish you.

He smiles at you before he gets up and brings you with him as well. He licks his lips as he takes your blazer off before throwing it on the grass of the field, making a blanket of some sort. Your heart races as that, realizing that the two of you were going to do this… out in the open. You look at him, half turned on and half confused.

“You mean you want to do this… right now? Right here?” You let out a nervous chuckle.

He all but looks at you mischievously, nodding. “What? You’re nervous we’ll get caught?”

You shake your head, trying to put a confident front up. “No. Just confirming with you.”

You plop yourself on the blazer you were just wearing, laying down on it. Baekhyun’s eyes glint at the view before him, and let’s his body fall on top of yours, towering over you. You smile at him before you initiate the kiss this time, and he melts right into you. You start to mindlessly rub your crotch against his, your hips bucking every now and then. You feel his hand suddenly grabbing your hip, stilling you from proceeding further. He pulls back and smirks.

“Let me please you first.” Just like that, your heart begins to beat crazily. He starts by lifting your shirt up a little, kissing your stomach lightly. His eyes looking at you every time his lips would leave your bare skin before he would place another kiss. He brought his hands to unbutton your pants, and swiftly pulled them down. You were wearing a pair of white lacy underwear, adorned with a rose at the top of it. You had initially bought them because you thought they were cute, but in this moment they felt dirty on your body, a piece of sexy material that made Baekhyun’s heart race just by looking at it.

He starts to kiss the fabric covering your lady parts, (Embarrassing name for them, you knew, but you were too shy to call it anything else), and you felt yourself becoming wet. Just from a simple kiss. Your mind started to race, and one thought alone brought you out of your euphoric moment. You brought your body up on your elbows, digging them into the dirt, looking at him with worry. He stopped what he was doing and raised his head at you.

“Did I do something wrong?” He pressed.

You bit your lip, uneasiness flooding within your veins as you gazed into his eyes.

“N-no. I just… I’m… a…” You felt shy even saying it.

“Virgin? You’re a virgin, Y/N?” He looks at you distraught, his expression alone could have made you laugh under normal circumstances, but right now you were terrified to see it.

You nod shyly, and you bring one of your arms up, your hand covering your face.

“I just never had time to meet anyone. I work all the time and I never even thought about it before, if you don’t want to do it anymore, I understand-”

He simply rises back up to you and plants a kiss on you, shutting you up. He comes back to look at you with a sweet, endearing smile.

“I think it’s cute that you’re a virgin. You don’t have to worry about that. Let me make you feel good, Y/N.” You could feel that twisty knot feeling in your stomach again, and you mutter a small, ‘okay’, and watch him dip his head back to where it was. You lay back down on the grass again, and you let him do exactly that, make you feel good.

He brought his fingers to pull down your underwear, and you could feel the cool air hit your core, making your pussy twitch. He finally takes them off completely, placing them on the grass somewhere, along with the shoes you were still wearing. He starts by kissing above your vagina, the tickling sensation almost makes you want to laugh, but you hold it in. He lets his tongue slide down to your left thigh, where he begins to suck and bite on it, leaving yet again, another hickey on your virgin body. He moans into you, and you look down at him, shyly putting your hands in his hair.

He flashes you a look before he rests his pretty lips on your clit, and you tighten your grip on his locks. He shuts his eyes, and that’s when he started to suck and flick his tongue against you. You sensitively moan, never experiencing this sensation before, and with the sudden confidence that he was doing well, Baekhyun started to move his tongue faster. He sucked harshly on you, your clit becoming swollen by mere seconds of him changing his tempo. His hands dug into your thighs, his fingernails pinching you. If anything, that’s what made you spill over the edge even more.

He drew back his face from your dripping core, and you could see your cum plastered on his chin. He wiped it off and let out a small chuckle before he started to undo his belt. Your nails are digging into the dirt now, you bite your lip at the beautiful sight of the tent erupting from his boxers. He pulled his shirt over his head and you collectively salivated at the sight. He was extremely toned, a subtle 6 pack on display for you, his lower regions that led to his cock were perfectly formed into a ‘V’ shape. His arms were practically bulging out, the detailed muscles flexing as he began to shimmy out of his boxers, his cock hitting his abdomen.

You unconsciously lick your lips, and to that he gave a devilish smile.

“Do you like what you see, Y/N?” He moves on top of you, his hand caressing your face as he tauntingly grinds his dick on your wetness, making you shiver.

“Y-yes.” You felt submissive under his touch, he could do anything to you right now and you wouldn’t refuse him.

He smirks before he shifts his mood to look serious, “I’m going to be slow. You need to tell me if I hurt you, okay?”

Your breath hitches and you try to mentally prepare for what will happen. You were losing your virginity to the boy you never thought you’d ever see again, the man who you loved. You could feel yourself relaxing, this was Baekhyun. He would take care of you.

“I trust you.”

That was all it took for him to look down, using his right arm to guide his throbbing cock inside of your needy pussy. Immediately, you clench tightly around him and close your eyes, bringing your hands to his bare back, to hold him closer. Holy shit, this fucking hurt.

You feel his cock getting swallowed by you, and the feeling of being stuffed like this made another flood erupt from your body. He stutters, his breath coming out in intervals, like he was trying to keep it together. “You’re so fucking tight.”

“I can’t believe you fit, I didn’t think you would. You’re so big.” You breathily whisper.

He looks at you, a blank expression plastered. “I’m not all the way in yet, Y/N.”

Your eyes widen as you look down, confirming with him that he was definitely not all the way in. You could see half of his cock still hasn’t entered you yet, and you gulp. He notices your nervousness and moves his free hand to rub your clit, moving slowly in circles, and a groan escapes from you. He starts to push himself deeper inside of you, and at first the stretch burns, it was excruciating even, but the way he made sure to focus on your comfort by pleasing you overcame that pain.

You suddenly feel the base of his cock hit your body, and you let a throaty sigh out. He was shaking above you, and you put your hands on his shoulders, tapping your fingers, motioning him to move, to do anything.

He slowly pulls back and thrusts back inside of you, your eyes widening in the immense pleasure that came to you in a wave, and suddenly you don’t want this feeling to end. He grunts above you, quickening his pace every moment he slams into you, the sound of your pussy juices ringing in your ears.

“Baekhyun… Mmh… you feel so good.” Your mouth dangles open, and you moan loudly, throwing your head back.

“Yeah, baby? My cock fills you up so fucking good. You’re taking it so well.” He growls as he speeds up, his cock pulsating and growing bigger with the help of your high pitched squeals.

“I think… I’m going to cum.” Your brain scrambles, trying to say anything to him. You could feel your walls clenching around him tighter than usual, your stomach twisting into knots.

“Y/N.” He grabs your face with your hand as his movements become sloppy, his cock beginning to slow down, and you frown. You look into his eyes, and you could read the love he had for you written all over his face.

“I love you.” Your heart speeds up, and you gasp as he picks up the pace once again.

“I-I love you too.” You stutter.

You both orgasm together, you moaning in bliss, while he lets out a whiny moan. He collapses on you, his face finding comfort in the crevice of your neck. You could hear him breathing rapidly, trying to catch his breath as you feel him pumping you with his cum. He slides off of you, laying next to you on the makeshift blanket he made.

You look at the stars in the sky, and you remember the ferris wheel. You smile to yourself as you continue to catch your breath, and you raise your hand up, pointing to them. Baekhyun follows your gaze and mimics your stare up to the sky.

“...When we were on that ferris wheel. The night we kind of had our first fight… I remember how I laid in bed that night thinking that I could touch them.”

Baekhyun lays there, a smile transpiring across his face. You look at him, a side smile appears on yours as you look back up.

“Which is stupid. No one can touch stars. But when I thought about it,” You suck in your breath, bringing your hand back down, “I realized I only felt like that because you were with me.”

You drape your arm around his chest, and he looks at you adoringly. He opens his mouth while the apple of cheeks brighten.

“When I first met you that day, and you gave me the bread? My first thought was- I never once had been given a gift before. I mean, like, my parents never gave me any type of rewards for being good at school or anything. My father didn’t believe in that. He always said, ‘Good behavior shouldn’t be awarded, it should be expected’. So… receiving that from you kind of showed some appreciation for everything that I did. Like, I did good in school and the reward I got was you. And the delicious bread.” He finished off with a laugh as he moved his face closer to yours.

“I’m glad I gave you bread that day.” You giggle.

He kisses you before he sits back up, looking down at his exposed dick. He watches as you get up as well, looking down at it as well. He jokingly covers it, a frightened look on his face.

“You pervert! Stop looking!” You laugh hard, pushing him over as you get your soiled and wet underwear from off the grass. The both of you finish putting the rest of your clothes on in silence before you go back to the bench.

He picked up the untouched bread that sat there and coughed, causing you to look at him.

“Before we go, I have two questions for you. Actually, three.” He says in a cute tone, sounding like a child reciting the alphabet.

You roll your eyes, “Yeah? What are these three questions, sir?”

Baekhyun walks with you, slowly taking each step to the entrance of the school. You link your arms with him, peering under your eyelashes at him.

“First, I want to take you somewhere right now. Second, you can spend the night at my house. And third,” He pauses as he removes his arm from yours and steps in front of you, cocking his head and beaming, “Will you be my girlfriend, Y/N?”

You cover your smile with your hand, snorting. “First, the first two ‘questions’, (You put your fingers in air quotes), weren’t questions. But I accept both of them. Thirdly,” You step up to him and kiss his lips. You linger for a couple of seconds, nothing special. Just a simple peck. You pull back and sparkle at him.

“Yes, I’ll be your girlfriend Baekhyun.”

He suddenly yells out, causing you to cover your ears from the abrupt noise, laughing at him. He starts to jump up and down, swinging his fist in the air as he smiles at you, grinning from ear to ear. He pulls your face into his with both hands, giving you a kiss and letting his lips pop off with an exaggerated smacking noise.

“Shut up! You’re being too loud,” Secretly loving the reaction he gave you.

“How can I not be? The most beautiful girl in the world just said she’d be my girlfriend?” He wraps his arm around your shoulder as he guides out of the school, a place that you’ll cherish forever.

You weren’t sure where he was planning on taking you at 8 o'clock at night, but you did agree to letting him surprise you. You walk on the gravel road and reach the sidewalk, realizing you were heading back into the town. Baekhyun covers your eyes as you notice the familiar area coming into view.

“Where are we going?” You’re giggling as you clumsily put one foot over each other, weary of tripping.

“Someplace I think you’ll like.” He responds in a sing-song voice.

Suddenly, he stops you as he moves your body to face forward. You stand there in confusion, and when you can’t wait any longer for him to take your eyes off your face, you tear them off yourself.

You stood in front of the Arcade, the red neon sign illuminating against your skin. You let out a quick breath, smiling. You dip your head back to look at Baekhyun, who brought his hands next to his face and shook them, like he was surprising you.

“Jongin used to tell me that you guys played here a lot. When I moved here 6 years ago this was the first place I ran to. I want to show you something.” He picked up your hand and entered inside. You let him drag you as you looked around, the place didn’t change at all. A young boy was sitting behind the desk, scrolling on his phone. He looked at you guys for a moment before he let you know that he was going to close soon.

“Arcade closes in 30 minutes.” He returns to look at his phone, the tight knitted expression on his face not changing.

“Thanks, boss.” Baekhyun replies as he rolls his eyes at you, and continues to tug you further inside. You hadn’t thought about this place in years, and you let your eyes close for a second, the smell of coins filling your senses. You smile as the two of you stop in front of an old friend of yours.

“Space Battle!” You rush over to the machine, taking note of the rusted button panel and peeling stickers adorning the game you played when you were younger.

“Wait. You know about Space Battle?” Baekhyun stands next to you as you happily take in the starting screen. You whisk your head to face him, nodding.

“I used to play this all the time. I had the high score for the longest, but someone beat it after just a couple of weeks after my months of hard work. Jongin took me here before I had met you and I tried to beat it for like… two hours. My hands were killing me.” You remember how angry you were over a stupid game, but it sat with you sentimentally. You grin and shake your head as you look back at the screen. It began to fizzle out, and the list of high scores popped up.

kyoong04

bookworm27

You couldn’t believe it. You were still fucking second place.

“Wow I’m surprised no one has beaten my high score, it’s been like… 6 years.”

Baekhyun looks at you with wide eyes as you look at him with a shocked expression.

“You’re kyoong04?”

Realization dawns on him, and he looks at the screen. He looks back at you, a smile erupting on his face.

“You’re bookworm27? It took me 5 hours to beat your high score, princess.”

You take into account the cute nickname he gave you, but that was the last thing in your head right now. You could not believe that Baekhyun was the one who had beaten your high score, and you really couldn’t believe that he was now doubling over, laughing as he held his stomach.

“Jongin told me you were obsessed with a game here, but he couldn’t remember what it was called. He said you were pissed off that someone decided to take your crown. I can’t believe that it’s you!” He continued to laugh as you looked at him deranged, still not believing your ears.

You huff. “I’m going to get some coins and beat it right now.”

You start to walk away from him, but he grabs your arm. He shakes his head as a couple of giggles escape from him.

“It’s late. You won’t be able to beat my highscore, Y/N. If it means that much to you, I’ll just buy it off the owner or something. Then we can play it anytime you want,” He bops your nose, “and keep failing to beat me at it.”

You scoff as you turn your back to him, and you just know that he’s grinning like an idiot. You say goodnight to the boy and he waves you both off, eyes still glued to his phone. Baekhyun leads you back to his house, the cold air feeling warmer when you’re next to him. Crickets were chirping in the background as you both quietly made it to the door of his home, him looking back at you and putting a finger to his mouth, ‘Be quiet’.

He slowly opens the door that was left unlocked, and you cover your mouth to not make any noise. He takes you down the hall and pushes you inside his room softly, closing the door behind him.

You stand there as you take in his room, the desk and bed sheets were still the same as they were the last time you had been there. Only now, the desk was completely barren, and you could see a thin film of dust formed on it. The bedsheets looked as though they had been freshly washed compared to the state of the abandoned dusty room. His walls were empty, except for one thing that hung by a thumbtack.

You rush forward, hopping on his bed like a child, inching closer to the photo. You unpin it from the wall, grasping the photo of the two of you. The edges of it were yellowed now, and a few specks of dust were scattered on it. You gently blow on it, ridding it of the debris. You run your fingers over Baekhyun’s face, your heart melting as you look at the lovesick expression he had.

You feel the bed dip as Baekhyun sits next to you, his legs criss crossed. He grabs the photo from you gently, staring at it with a small smile.

“I used to look at this photo everytime I fell asleep.” He whispers to you, making sure he wasn’t being too loud.

Your heart leaps from your chest as you blush. “That’s really cute.”

He grins at you before he reaches his arm out to his desk, laying the bittersweet memory down.

He grabs you and lays you down next to him in his bed, earning a small giggle from you. He looks at you with that loving gaze, and you can’t help but feel yourself falling for him all over again.

“I love you, Y/N.”

“I love you too, Baekhyun.”

#baekhyun fic #baekhyun fanfic #luviebaekfics #baekhyun #exo fanfic #baekhyun fluff #baekhyun angst #baekhyun ff #exo #baekhyun smut #jongin #yeah this is a long one #this fic made me cry

[absolutepokemontrash]

MC’s Half Demon and They Look Awfully Familiar Lesson 17

Series Masterlist

So, the aftermath’s here! This took significantly longer than I thought it would, but oh well. Enjoy everyone!

So, to recap where everyone’s favourite dysfunctional demon family are at right now: Belphie’s still guilt spiralling but he wants to make amends, MC is having a self worth crisis because of what happened, Lucifer was homicidal less than a day ago, and the rest of the brothers are very mad at Belphie.

So, a good little while passes, MC moves back into their room and doesn’t really come out or try to talk to anyone, Lucifer practically lives in his study, and Belphie holes himself up in whichever room that no one else is in.

Keep in mind, no one knows the truth about Lilith’s death yet because it never came up because MC isn’t a descendent of the human version of Lilith.

The brothers (sans Belphie) went and visited MC, who was very happy to see all of them, but everything felt kind of off, everyone was slightly on edge. But nobody brought it up because no one wanted to be the catalyst for the next big family fight, especially so soon after MC got hurt.

It had been almost a week and MC could barely cobble together the desire to leave their room. They had made themselves a prisoner in their own house right after freeing Belphie from his house arrest, how ironic is that?

Stupid…

How naive could they get? To think that just because they were family that everyone would welcome them with open arms? And how stupid would they have to be to believe that they were a proper demon like the rest of them? Demons were manipulative tricksters at their nicest, if MC didn’t understand that than they were a shit excuse for a demon.

Spending time lying in bed staring up at the ceiling wasn’t the best way to pass the time, but MC had grown tired of flicking through the same five apps on their DDD and had contemplated chucking it at the wall. With nothing to distract them, MC was alone with their thoughts.

Of course they couldn’t fend off Belphegor, of course they lost… they barely had any better a hold on their magic than they did when the year started. They weren’t a full demon, but they weren’t some weak little human either, but maybe things would have been better if they were human. If they were human, they wouldn’t have had magic, they wouldn’t have had a fighting chance at all. There would have been no shame in losing. But MC wasn’t a full human, they had their fighting chance and lost anyway.

“MC?”

Their head snapped towards the source of the voice. Through a bright gold glow, they saw an unfamiliar woman, her eyebrows were knit with concern. Not being able to muster up the energy to really be openly panicked, MC sat up and rested their head on their chin, then raised an eyebrow.

“What?”

“Oh! Um…” the ghostly woman puffed out her cheek and twiddled her fingers as her eyes darted around the room. “I didn’t exactly think this introduction through, my bad…”

It was MC’s turn to be confused, standing in front of her was a woman who didn’t look like an angel or a demon, yet somehow was able to cobble together the magical strength necessary to actually make herself visible to MC. And now, she was stressing about an awkward introduction.

“I’m Lilith!” The woman finally blurted out, she clamped her eyes shut and quickly stuck her hand out.

MC blinked at the outstretched hand like it was a completely foreign gesture. “…what?”

“Yeah! Um… I uh…” Lilith withdrew her hand and facepalmed. “I’m really sorry…”

“I-uh… Lilith? Like… Lilith, my father’s sister Lilith?”

“…yes?”

“…please explain.”

And Lilith did explain, she explained the ghost bit, how she can’t technically go up to the Celestial Realm nor does she want to, and how she’s kind of been playing guardian Fallen Angel to the entire family.

MC finally got to learn the reason the Grimoire was in the tomb, and why their father was so damn loyal to Diavolo.

Lilith also explains that she’s kind of the reason MC is down in the Devildom in the first place. Lucifer picked an entirely different totally normal human, but Lilith switched the files and MC was brought down instead.

MC still obviously had questions.

“So…” MC mumbled. “That’s why he tried to kill me.”

Lilith pursed her lips and looked away. “Yeah…”

MC let out an explosive sigh as their hand unconsciously creeped to their neck. MC’s fingers brushed over raised skin from barely healed over scratches.

“He wants to apologize.”

“What?”

“Belphie, he wants to apologize to you.”

MC snorted and rolled their eyes, they shifted over so Lilith couldn’t see their face. “Hmph… maybe if he grovels enough I won’t sic Cerberus on him…”

“You’re under no obligation to forgive him-”

“I know!” MC snapped, grinding the base of their palm against their eye to stop the tears that threatened to burst. “And I won’t!”

The problem was, Lilith’s story actually ended up making MC feel bad for him, which made them feel angry at themselves, which made them feel more upset than before.

On one hand, Belphie was motivated by the loss of someone incredibly close to him and never received closure because Lucifer kept Lilith’s “survival” a secret.

On the other hand, Belphie tricked, manipulated, and then tried to kill MC. That couldn’t just be waved off with an “oh he was just grieving”

After some deliberation, MC decided they were going to do one more thing to help Belphie.

“Father.” MC hit their knuckles against the door to their father’s room. The door opened almost immediately and Lucifer stood in the doorway.

“Yes MC? Do you need anything, are you alright?”

“Yeah, I’m fine, I just need to talk to you.”

“Come in then,” Lucifer stepped aside and MC walked into the room, he closed the door behind them. “What is it?”

“I know about what happened with Lilith.”

Lucifer froze, MC did their best to hold his gaze and not waver.

“You need to tell everyone.”

“…how did you find out?”

“She um… told me. Lilith, I mean… she’s still around.” MC awkwardly twirled their finger in the air as they explained. “You’ve kept this hidden for too long, the secret has to be told so this can end.”

Lucifer wasn’t on board immediately, but eventually, he was convinced.

Everyone was gathered, including Belphie, and Lucifer explained what had really happened the day Lilith had died.

Of course there were shouts of shock and outrage that slowly melted into a melancholy silence. Lilith was still around, but her presence was so limited, but she was still there with them! Their sister was still there!

When everyone dispersed to go process the news, Belphie approached MC.

“H-hey.”

MC almost outwardly shuddered at the sound of the Avatar of Sloth’s voice, but they held firm and turned to face him.

Anything they wanted to say died in their throat as MC got a good look at Belphie for the first time in over a week. He looked like complete and utter garbage. His hair was a mess, bags lined the underside of his eyes, and his entire posture seemed to just droop like a wilting flower. Though, it wasn’t like MC had much of a platform to stand on when it came to critiquing appearance at that point in time, they looked just as awful.

“What do you want?” MC asked quietly, they had meant to put more force behind their words, but most if not all of their focus had gone towards not allowing their voice to break or waver.

“To apologize.”

So, Lilith was right, he was sorry. Rage bubbled in MC’s gut as they clenched their fist. How dare he think he could just, apologize and think everything could turn out okay?! MC opened their mouth to scream, cry, hurl every insult they had spent the previous week thinking about, but nothing came out. The anger subsided and MC deflated, they crossed their arms and gestured for Belphie to go ahead.

“Go on.” They mumbled.

Belphie’s gaze drifted to the wall, he clenched his pillow tighter to his chest, then looked back to MC. At least he had the decency to look them in the eye.

“I’m sorry for what I did, MC. I messed up and I hurt you. I blamed you for something you had nothing to do with, even though you were nothing but nice to me. No excuse would make what I did any better, so I’m… I’m sorry…”

MC gnawed on their lower lip and knitted their eyebrows. He sounded sincere enough, but MC wasn’t just going to roll over and forgive him just like that. They were still so angry and betrayed, but they didn’t want to be. Stupid feelings…

They took a deep breath and squared their shoulders, looking Belphie directly in the eyes.

“Okay.”

“…okay?”

“Okay.” MC repeated. “I’m not going to forgive you just to absolve your guilt, but I’m done with this. It’s over and I’m moving on. If you’re really sorry, don’t ever do something like that again.”

The tiniest glimmer of hope sparkled in Belphie’s eyes as he nodded. “I swear on my life I’ll never do anything like that again.”

MC stiffly nodded. “Good. Now, I’m going to my room. I have school tomorrow.”

When Belphie turned to go back to his room, Lucifer melted out of the shadows and stood next to MC.

“That was very big of you.”

“Thanks father.” MC mumbled.

“Are you sure you want to go to school tomorrow? I can ask Lord Diavolo to extend your time off.”

“No,” MC shook their head. “I’m ready. Besides,” They stifled a giggle. “I don’t want to miss everyone’s reactions to Human History.”

Wanting to watch demons freak out about weird parts of human history is a very valid reason to want to go to school.

Anyway, all eight residents of the HOL goes back to school, and MC’s cover story was that they had gotten the flu and was too sick to go to school, and Belphie had been brought back from the human world early. No one had the balls to question the seven rulers of hell, so no one asked any questions.

Luke was very excited to see his friend again, so excited that he got in trouble for talking in class. No big deal, lunchtime was still free for them to talk!

The day was perfectly normal, which was a blessing for everyone.

Diavolo officially deemed that Belphie was no longer a threat to the exchange program, so Belphie was allowed to return to his student council duties without issue.

Things between Diavolo and Barbatos and MC were quite… confusing.

For one thing, Diavolo was the crown prince and MC had really liked him before the stuff in the previous timeline and learning about exactly how he had secured their father’s loyalty.

And for Barbatos… he was just fucking terrifying.

“MC!”

The sound of Diavolo jovially calling their name jolted MC out of their thoughts. Thinking about the upcoming Demonology midterm would have to wait.

“Hello, Lord Diavolo.” MC knew better than to be openly pissed at the soon to be monarch, especially after everything that had transpired.

“Are you doing alright, MC? How has school been treating you?” Diavolo continued to pepper MC with questions with barely any gaps for MC to actually reply. Barbatos stood on the sidelines with a soft neutral smile on his face, which only served to unnerve MC more.

“I’m doing fine, Lord Diavolo. There’s no need for concern.”

Diavolo’s rampant questioning came to a stop, and MC swore they could see his expression fall ever so slightly.

“I’m glad to hear that, MC. If you need anything, just ask!”

He ended the interaction with a hesitant pat on MC’s head before walking off to his next class. Though, the presence of the butler still loomed behind MC.

“While I’m very glad you’re well, MC,” Barbatos said icily calm. “I must ask that you refrain from going into my room again.”

“Y-yes sir.” MC mumbled.

“Have a lovely day.”

Reason why everyone should be at least a little afraid of Barbatos #473

The relationship between MC and the Royals does end up getting repaired eventually, it’s just… really awkward for the time being.

Home was still awkward as all hell, the murder attempt definitely weakened the brotherly bonds MC had spent months repairing, and the hostility wasn’t doing MC’s emotional recovery much good.

“This is ridiculous.” Lilith’s voice popped into MC’s head while they sat at the dining table finishing up their homework. MC jumped slightly in their seat and frantically looked around for their aunt’s apparition.

“What’s got you spooked?” Satan asked from his place across the table.

“N-nothing. Just a chill.” MC quickly replied, trying to go back to their work.

“Nice recovery, MC. Very smooth.”

“Shut up!” MC thought. “What are you doing in my head?”

“If you want me to leave, just say so.” Lilith’s nasally childlike huff nearly caused MC to openly roll their eyes.

“No, what is it? What do you need?”

“I don’t really need anything, but look at this fractured house!” Lilith cried. “This is worse than the time Mammon stole everyone’s pocket watches!”

“Pocket…watches?”

“It was 1803, get with the program, MC.”

“Lilith, what are we talking about here?”

“Oh! Right! Well, this house is insanely divided and sucky right now, it’s terrible!” Lilith whined, as much as MC hated to submit to their ghostly aunt’s whining, she did have a point.

Just that morning Asmo just happened to neglect to paint Belphie’s nails when he went out of his way just minutes earlier to track down Lucifer to make sure his nails were painted. Later when Belphie walked into the library with Beel, Satan ended up picking up the cat and walking straight out. Satan walking out of a library was like a fish walking out of water.

That wasn’t the only thing either, Mammon had taken it upon himself to be a human (or demon to be more precise) barrier between Belphie and MC at almost all times. The only times when Mammon couldn’t do that was when the witches decided to summon him.

Levi continued to be a recluse, but on the rare occasion he did come out, there was no friendly hellos between him and Belphie.

Lucifer… well, he did a good job hiding his contempt. He had respected MC’s decision to let Belphie try and fix things and he himself seemed eager for everything to be fixed, but he wasn’t exactly aiding in the repairs. Every time he had to look at Belphie it was so expressionless that MC swore that Mammon could swipe someone’s wallet right in front of him and Lucifer wouldn’t even frown.

Even Beel, he bounced back the quickest in terms of being ready to be around Belphie again, but the even psychically linked twins couldn’t fully shake the feeling of distance between the two.

“Well, what do you want me to do? Last time I tried to fix this family’s problems I almost died.”

“H-hey, I don’t think you should joke about that just yet…”

“Bite me. I wasn’t joking.”

“Well… okay. But I can’t really manifest any power right now! Smacking some sense into Belphie really took a toll on my ability to do much.”

“Hmph…” MC thought long and hard, well, two minutes long. “We could hold a movie night.”

Lilith gasped and MC swore they could hear the sound of her clapping her hands together. “Yes! Everyone can hang out and eat popcorn! Oh it’ll be great! Build a Fort! Forts bring people closer together!”

The movie night was the first of many little get togethers that MC quietly orchestrated to get everyone back on speaking terms with each other. They weren’t a direct part of all of them, but they could see the good they were doing.

A small video game tournament, going out to eat together, just relaxing in the same room, all of it added up, and sooner rather than later everyone was back to… not hating each other.

The brothers are still brothers after all, there’s always that tiny instinct that tells siblings to try and ruin the other’s day

As for Belphie and MC’s relationship…

Things slowly but surely moved back to the way they were before. MC came out of their room to sit with everyone and hang out, everyone progressively let Belphie back into their lives, and the nightmares gradually lessened.

For the first time in a little over a month and a half, MC felt truly safe again, which was odd considering they were in their planetarium with someone who they declared they’d never forgive. They still hadn’t, but things had gotten better.

Belphie was doing his damndest to show that he was truly sorry about everything. It started off with small things; helping MC clean the house, giving them pencils when they didn’t have any, covering for them when they had dinner duty,

The little victories may not have seemed very noteworthy, but to Belphie and MC, they were everything.

“That’s Orion, that’s Orion’s Belt,” Belphie pointed up at the shifting ceiling of the planetarium, tracing each and every constellation that he saw and pointing them out to MC and Beel. The latter had seen these stars and heard Belphie’s explanations a thousand times over, but never tired of them. MC was staring up at the gorgeous sight of the human world night sky they had left behind with a small smile on their face.

“That’s Ursa Major,” Beel pointed up as he offered MC the bag of chips he was eating.

“Mhm,” Belphie quietly chirped, he then pointed to a nearby constellation. “And that’s Ursa Minor.”

“Huh, if you connect these stars, it looks like a pair of pants.” MC piped up, tracing the set of stars.

Belphie snickered and nodded. “Yeah, it kind of does.”

“Look, that one’s a spatula!” Beel pointed at a constellation, Belphie snorted and facepalmed.

“Beel, Buddy, that’s the Little Dipper.”

After a little while longer Belphie let out an explosive yawn and stretched out like a cat. MC and Beel yawned in response.

“I’m goin’ to sleep.”

“Belphie wait,” MC giggled. “You can’t sleep here!”

“Watch me.”

“You’ll get a sore back, Belphie.” Beel picked up Belphie and slung him over his shoulder as the Avatar of sloth began to snore, he then turned and sat MC on his other shoulder. “Bedtime for everyone.”

MC let out another yawn and rubbed their eyes. Maybe Belphie had the right idea, it was late as hell…

——————

Author’s Note: You ever know how you want something to turn out in your head, but the moment you go to write it down you kind of want to yeet yourself into oblivion? Yeah that’s what happened here.

The game itself didn’t give me much to work with in terms of how everyone would react if MC didn’t shrug off their near death, so… 🤷‍♀️ oh well! What’s done is done!

#obey me #obey me! #obey me! shall we date? #obey me shall we date #Obey me MC #Obey me Lucifer #Obey me Belphegor #Obey me Barbatos #obey me Diavolo #Obey me Beelzebub #Obey me Lilith #Obey me Headcanons #Obey me! Headcanons #Obey me fic #obey me fic #Obey me! Fic

[bookwyrminspiration]

Her teachers and classmates didn't like her very much (which I think is unrealistic but that's another rant

I saw this in one of your posts, and I wanted to know what you meant by it? I think I could understand her classmates disliking her, or at the very least avoiding her, but I guess it makes sense that the teachers would probably be at least fond of her.

Okay okay okay so!! I have thoughts on this--and these are all my personal opinions/critiques of the situation, so you are fully welcome to disagree with me entirely this is just me!! that being said kinda ranty post ahead so here's your warning if you don't want to read that!

Her being disliked is set up almost immediately with, "[Her classmates] weren't exactly fans of their resident child prodigy" (pg 5, book one). But I find it incredibly hard to believe that Sophie, a high school senior going to a typical school as far as we know, would be hated by everyone. Going with a typical high school, she probably has like seven different classes and a few hundred people in her grade (senior). If my numbers are off it's because I don't go to a typical high school and am basing this off what I loosely know about my partner's high school.

But either way, you're (general you, not you specifically nonsie) telling me that out of the 100+ people Sophie sees on a regular basis and goes to school with, all of them hate her? None of them like her even a little bit? And on top of that, her teachers as well? Maybe Mr. Sweeney was just a bad teacher, but we certainly didn't see any other comparisons where she had a nice one. I find it incredibly hard to believe that all of Sophie's classmates and teacher's disliked her. This is a 12 year old amongst 18 year olds who is clearly uncomfortable and anxious and doesn't want to draw attention to herself, and you're telling me not a single person in that school empathized with her?

here's the fun thing about humans: they've got empathy built in. And if they don't have it preprogrammed, they notice it's what other people do and find ways to connect to achieve similar results (meaning you can be kind and caring without being empathetic). Humans are naturally inclined to group together. They find people like them and form groups. When we see people not caring for each other or people in need we tend to think something's wrong with them. Like Singer's pond example: if a child fell into a pond and starting drowning and a witness didn't do anything and yet was fully capable of helping without loosing something of equal or greater value, we would think they were wrong! that the correct and natural response was to help! that's an extreme but take that general idea and apply it to Sophie ehre

It think that if in the real world Sophie, a 12 year old among 17-18 year olds, would be cared for and looked after by at least a few if not the majority of her peers. Some of them could be bullies, yes. I'm not saying everyone has to love her, but I think at the very least there'd be a few students who were nice and looked out for her because that is a child. People aren't inherently mean and awful. If they weren't friends with here they'd be nice to her and try to make her feel comfortable and welcome because she's so out of place.

As someone who has been in classes with people older than me, ranging from a grade above to entire adults with kids while I was 14, people were not mean! yes, not all of those situations were high school and some adults might be more mature, but also! There were 17-18 year olds! Also in that class! And you know how me and the other 14 year old were treated? Same as everyone else.

People don't automatically hate the kids who are ahead. At most they just...ignore them. And not because they don't like them but because they have no reason to interact and are focusing on their own work. A 12 year old high school senior may be unusual, and they might be disappointed that they don't get the benefit of curved grading, but I don't think they'd dislike her as intensely and Shannon seems to be making them. Sophie might not fit in with them but that doesn't mean they'd all hate her.

And the thing with the teachers?? I have yet to meet a teacher who sees a super smart student and hates them for it. I think Mr. Sweeney was an outlier. Teachers with kids younger than they usually teach are so nice! They like it when you succeed and hope you'll do great things! The vast majority of them are nice to kids like Sophie and encourage them. And you're telling me that all of Sophie's teachers were rude and unlikeable? It's never stated that they were all awful but we only ever see Mr. Sweeney as an example. I just don't believe that all 7 of Sophie's teachers were jealous that she was smarter than them.

Based on my own experiences as the resident star student at every school/class I've been in, everyone hating her just doesn't feel realistic. Some people aren't going to like her, yes. There are going to be students upset they aren't at the top or that she busts the curve. But all her classmates and teachers adamantly disliking her? Sorry, but I don't believe it.

I think a few students would instead look out for her, be nice and ask how she's doing. And if they don't, then they'd be friendly with her and amicable. Those that don't interact with her would stay concentrated to their own friend groups and work, not silently judging a smart 12 year old. Humans care for each other.

And I think her teachers would be doting and look out for her and recognize how out of place she seems and try to make sure she's alright. They'd want her to do well and be happy to be part of her education and help her.

I just!! ahgaue!! Instead of being the hated social outcast for being smart, she'd at most be the social recluse who just doesn't talk to people but who everybody knows. They'd be friendly with her in passing and leave her to her own devices.

Maybe I've just had really good experiences but I simply don't think that an entire senior class would dislike her.

#if you cannot tell this has been bugging me for a while #and again!! all my own opinions based on my own experiences #so you are welcome to disagree with me #but I find it unrealistic #same as the 'he didn't seem to realize that unless the dinosaurs came to life and started eating people. no one cared' #which is /another/ whole rant I have stored up that I typed out in the tags before realizing it should probably be it's own post #so if you're interested in that I've got thoughts on that too #you know for only being like 5 pages long there are so many things that rub me the wrong way #like wow I am so upset considering it is so insiginficant in the grand scheme of the story #*insignificant #ouaoegoaerg #i am. thoughts #people aren't cruel!! teenagers aren't cruel! #i can say that as a teenager who spends time around other teenagers in school!! #we had a student who skipped a grade (haven't seen her since before covid so. no clue if she still goes here) #which isn't the same as six but she was treated the same as everyone else #humanity is /nice/ shannon #people care for each other #it is a thing #they are not naturally awful and full of hate and self-centered. they /care/. humanity is about cooperation and community #it's survivial #arhgfa #kotlc #keeper of the lost cities #sophie foster #quil's queries #nonsie #kotlc worldbuilding

[kpopxx]

Spy Games [Chapter 1] : More Than It Seems

Characters: Twice Momo, Male Reader

4579 words

Authors Note: This is literally the first fiction writing I have done since I was a little kid writing stories about a town full of hamburgers. I was inspired to try my hand at writing by the plethora of amazing kpop smut writers out there right now, but by @lockefanfic​, @nsfwtwicecatcher​, @nsfwflint​, and @ggidolsmuts​ in particular. If there are any similarities between my writing and theirs, please forgive me as I’ve spent more hours than I’d care to admit “researching” their work. 

One thing that amazes me is how the hell everyone cranks out thousands of words with such frequency, as this post isn’t even 5k and it took forever to write. I can’t begin to explain how much respect I have for all the authors out there who can write so much and maintain such high levels of quality.

As a new writer, I welcome any and all feedback! Feel free to drop me a line if you have any critiques, or if you just want to chat!

***

“Coming up on the target now.” 

“Roger that, remember the office is on the top floor. Let us know when you’re inside. And remember, no elevators...” teases your handler, Choa.

“Thanks for the reminder,” you reply sarcastically.

You survey the skyscraper against the night sky--it would be impressive if it weren’t one of a hundred just like it downtown Seoul--and wonder what you had done to deserve getting the short end of the stick. Of course, you knew there was a reason to avoid the elevators: they sat directly in front of the building’s concierge and the cameras in the lobby, while the stairwell lay in a remote part of the first floor. The logic behind your impending hike didn’t make the reality any less abhorrent.

“Meanwhile, Seolhyun gets to infiltrate an organization in the Caymans. Just my fucking luck.” you grumble to yourself.

“Oh, stop whining, you big baby,” says Choa, reminding you to keep your thoughts to yourself.

You sneak past the lobby and towards the back of the floor you find the entrance to the stairwell in a poorly lit area.

“Beginning my climb.” you report, shaking out your legs as you prepare to go up.

“Sir, I-I’m getting some interference over comms,” chimes in the timid voice of the girl you knew to be your newest team member, Yoo Jeongyeon. “It could just be local chatter, but I want to make sure it’s not someone trying to listen in.”

“Probably nothing to worry about, but we’ll let you know if there’s anything you need to worry about.” Choa assures you. 

As you climb up the stairs, you wonder why anyone would want to listen in on this particular mission. This was a run-of-the-mill operation to investigate money laundering at an accounting firm. You’d infiltrated foreign governments, broken into and bugged the offices of billionaire CEOs, and tailed enemy agents. You could understand people wanting to hear those comms, but this? Either someone wanted something to listen to as a sleep aid, or this mission was more interesting than it looked.

A tip had come in through one of the new girls at the Intel Desk reporting that there was some fishy activity related to organized crime going on at the accounting firm. This was routine and you’d gone on dozens of similar recon missions before: break in, find suspicious intel, get out. But if someone wanted so badly to hear what was going on, the new girl may have stumbled onto something worthy of a promotion. Hayoung, you think her name was. Her chestnut, shoulder-length hair along with her well-endowed physique reminded you of a young mother, but her mature beauty belied her young age. You had caught yourself more than a few times fantasizing about her in your off hours…

You stop mid-way in the stairwell, scolding yourself for losing focus. Too often over the course of the last year you found yourself fantasizing about the women in your life. Sure, before the incident with Eunha you had sexual thoughts about your coworkers--you were surrounded by beautiful women, after all. But recently you noticed that your life was increasingly preoccupied with sex: both in your thoughts and the real-life exploits you carried out. 

Much longer than a few minutes later, you reach the 63rd floor out of breath and sweating, wishing more than ever that it was you and not Seolhyun lounging on the beach. You take a moment to compose yourself before peeking out into the office floor to see if the coast is clear.

“We may have a problem, boss. Jeongyeon looked into the comms disturbance and someone much more sophisticated than the average joe is definitely trying to tap in,” Choa says. “Jeongyeon’s kicking their ass right now blocking their access, but there’s only so much she can do alone. Eventually we’re going to lose control of this channel.”

“Dammit. I knew something was off with this op,” you grumble. “If they want to listen in to whatever I find, it must be important. We’ll go dark. Recon says this should be a quick in and out anyways. I’ll tag you once I’m out.”

“Be careful. Signal us if anything goes wrong. Just don’t do anything stupid.” replies Choa. 

“What do you think they pay me all this money for?” you tease, wanting to put her nerves at ease. “See you on the other side. Over and out.”

You could hear the concern in her voice. Even though keeping you safe was part of her job, you knew she cared about you. You also knew as well as she did that anything could go wrong even in the five minutes it would take you to break in, especially when it appeared that someone knew exactly what you were doing.

You switch off your comms link and head out the door and into the office.

It looked exactly as you expected--rows and rows of non-descript cubicles, with a princely office lined with glass walls occupying the far corner. Jeongyeon had retrieved the floor plan by hacking into the building’s security database earlier in the week, and you knew after her effort tonight in detecting and fending off the comms interference that Choa would want you to acknowledge the work the new girl had been putting in. She certainly was more skilled than the five previous team members you’d fired after Eunha, but you found it difficult to bring yourself to praise her. The Ops Officer position she occupied was a sore point for you, after all.

You deftly pick the lock on the corner office door and immediately sit down in front of the terminal on the desk, logging in with the security bypass Jeongyeon drew up. 

Again your thoughts drift to Eunha. Eunha was your longtime Ops Officer--highly skilled, you trusted her more than anyone. It also helped that she was your fiance. It made you sad to think about her; about what could have been, what should have been. Over the past year, you were constantly reminded of her absence by the utter incompetence of her replacements. You suppose it was nice that at the very least, Jeongyeon didn’t give you many opportunities to bemoan her performance in the same way--to remind you of Eunha.

You shake your head, compelling yourself to rise out of your funk and get on with the mission.

As you scroll through files, you stop on one with a familiar signature. Reading its contents, your eyes open wider--suddenly you understand why someone would be interested to listen in to your communications. You quickly save the file to your flash drive and stand up to leave, only to be startled by a figure in the doorway.

“Care to tell me what’s on that?” comes a familiar voice from the darkness that you knew to be Hirai Momo’s. Momo was an agent for a foreign espionage agency--you had as friendly a rivalry as you could have when working for different governments. 

“What was the point of trying to hack our comms if you were just going to show up and ask me that?”

“I had no intention of coming until you decided to ghost your girlfriends,” teases Momo. “Besides, I like showing you how much better I am at sneaking around.”

Momo flicks on the light and she comes into focus. The Japanese government made a good decision when they hired her, you think. She was built for the job of a seductive spy. Her perfectly toned legs had a lovely sheen all the way up to her short skirt, while her cleavage suggested that her tits were ready to burst out of her tight, patterned blouse. Where most of your attention was drawn, however, was her lustrous blue hair, which fell to her shoulders.

“I may actually need your help with this, once you see what’s on it,” you say, nodding your head at the flash drive.

“Oh, so you’re willing to give it to me? I thought I was going to have to fuck you for it,” she says sarcastically. You knew behind the humor was more than a nugget of truth, though. Sex had been the primary vehicle for information trading with Momo over the years. You decide to test your reading of the situation.

“Just because I need your help doesn’t mean I’m giving it for free…”

Momo brings her thumb to her mouth and bites gently as she ponders your not-so-subtle proposition. She takes her turn to look you up and down, making you feel more than a little self conscious in her gaze of judgment. After so many years in the dangerous world of espionage, there were only a handful women who could make you feel so small. Then again, Momo was no regular girl. 

Once she’s satisfied she has properly appraised your worth, Momo lets go of her thumb and straightens her blouse.

“Fine,” she says matter-of-factly, “let’s get to it,” unbuttoning her blouse as she walks towards you.

You are surprised by the lack of fight she put up, but you thought it best to keep that to yourself. Her tone reminds you of a business meeting--that is, if you hadn’t seen her pull her top off as she approached you. She sits in your lap on the chair, wrapping her arms around your neck as you meet her lips for a kiss. Momo’s mouth was familiar to you, introduced to you many times throughout your career. It seemed like every time you ran across her you had sex. One thing you adored about your relationship with her was that it was absolutely without strings attached. You fucked for work, but just because it was part of the job didn’t mean you both didn’t enjoy it. 

Momo, however, was loath to admit the pleasure she got out of her liaisons with you. Call it pride, call it being professional, whatever--Momo refused to act like sex with you was anything other than work, no different than working in a spreadsheet.

You feel her reach down to your pants, quickly unbuttoning them as she sinks to her knees in front of you. You smirk--her eagerness to please you betrayed her air of ambivalence.

Momo wastes no time getting down to business. You are certain the Japanese trained her very well in tender foreplay, but it seems she doesn’t care much for subtlety at the moment. Instead, she utilizes a more direct method to extract your pleasure--one that must have required its own fair share of training--as she spits on your cock before immediately forcing it as deeply in her mouth as she can take it. One, two, three bobs is all it takes for her to reach the base of your cock, her nose buried in your pelvis.

“Fuuuck me, that’s good,” you groan as you hold her head in place for several seconds, and Momo replies in turn with a cough that spits a healthy serving of saliva on to your cock. You release your grip on the back of her head to give her a chance to breathe, but she surprises you when she simply continues to work her mouth on your increasingly saliva-drenched cock, swirling her tongue around your base. Most of the other women you had slept with in recent months would be gasping for air by now, but Momo’s demeanor was cool, calm, and collected. Almost as if she was reading your mind, Momo paused her slurping and pulled her mouth off your shaft--but not forgetting to continue stroking it with achingly deft corkscrew motions.

“What’s the matter? Girls in your department not able to take care of your cock like a real woman?” Momo clicks her tongue and grins. “I’ve told you for years, you’d never be treated so poorly if you came to work for a professional outfit like ours.”

“Shut up and suck my cock.”

Momo shrugs, and gets back to the task at hand. Slobbering even more as she takes you into your mouth again, you pause to thank your lucky stars that you had a job that paid you in part to fuck women like Momo. You gaze upon her face, which has become just as messy as your cock. Momo’s sloppy blowjob has not only left liberal amounts of spit on your cock, but on her face as well--with strands of her blue hair plastered to her cheeks. Even though you thought it impossible, you feel your cock get harder at the sight of Momo’s messy face.

For several minutes, Momo continues inhaling your cock as you find yourself nearing the point of no return, you yank Momo’s head off your throbbing cock in order to prolong your session. A bit too forcefully, it seems, as Momo falls over onto her side.

“What the fuck!” yelps Momo as she picks herself back up, glaring at you. “I suck your cock and you thank me by throwing me on the ground?

“I didn’t mean to, I’m just not ready to cum yet. We both know you would’ve ignored me if I had asked you to stop.”

“I guess you’re right about that,” Momo replies sheepishly. You knew from previous run-ins with her that she loved nothing more than swallowing cum. Even though you had just denied her that favor, you were already thinking about how to make it up to her in a few minutes.

“How about I repay your kindness? Get up on the table and let me eat you.”

“Let’s skip the pleasantries. I’ll get up on the table, but you’re going to fuck me.”

“Someone’s eager to see what’s in this thumb drive,” you tease, inadvertently reminding yourself that this was a transactional liaison. You suspected that Momo’s interest in you extended beyond her desire for the information at hand, and part of you yearned to take her outside of the confines of work. You’re skeptical such a day would ever come, however, given how ambitious Momo was. 

You knew her story--she applied for a job in the Japanese spy agency several years ago, making it all the way through the process before being cut at the very end. She ended up receiving an offer shortly after one of the other finalists died in a ‘training accident’, but Momo lived with a chip on her shoulder ever since. She lived and worked with a pathological drive to prove the agency wrong in their original decision to cut her. Already the youngest lead operative in her country’s history, she had an eye on the directorship and seemed destined for it. So, you supposed, it was nice to be able to fuck her before she became famous.

Momo hops on up on the desk, hiking up her skirt to reveal a delicious-looking blue thong that matches her hair. She looks behind towards you with lust heavy in her eyes as she pulls her thong to the side, revealing her glistening pussy--already dripping, you noted.

“I don’t have all night.”

More than happy to oblige, you line your painfully throbbing cock up with her pussy and you can feel the warmth radiating from it. You take a second to appreciate Momo’s incredible physique as your hands graze downward from her upper back, to her hips, and finally to her ass. As you rub it, you cannot help but appreciate how sublimely taut it is. 

“Jeeze, you act like this is the first time you’ve seen a woman naked,” Momo jabs, interrupting your reverie.

You are starting to get annoyed with Momo’s demeanor. It was nothing new, really--she always carried an air of superiority--but it nonetheless grates on your nerves to see her be so dismissive. You are mature enough to understand that at least a part of this aggravation had to do with the fact that you knew Momo slept with plenty of men for work. Not so mature, however, to be able to stifle the primal urge deep inside of you that wanted Momo to see you as the best of all her lovers. More than ever, it seemed that sexual vanity mattered a great deal to your self-confidence.

With a renewed sense of purpose and your cock in hand, you enter Momo slowly with a long stroke until you fill her to the hilt. In unison with your initial insertion, Momo lets out a whine that crescendos as you bottom out.

As you begin to thrust in and out Momo settles in and widens her stance ever so little, which has the added benefit of allowing you to go even deeper into her warm, wet pussy. Momo was not a girl of surprises. Her face was gorgeous, capable of angelic beauty and fiery lust. Her body reflected the many hours she spent in the gym with ample breasts, insanely tight abs, and a toned ass to match. Her pussy feels exactly as sublime as her beautiful face and incredible body suggested. The perfect combination for a woman who used her body to seduce and take advantage of brainless men. You decide to push out your mind the realization that at this very moment, you are in fact one of those men.

You wanted to make sure Momo felt each and every drive into her hot flesh. Momo continued to moan quietly, each breath punctuated with a new thrust and the sound of your skin meeting hers.

“Looks like someone’s gotten real quiet all of a sudden,” you say, noticing her haughty attitude had subsided as pleasure took you both over.

“Oh, get over yourself,” Momo says, looking back at you with rekindled determination in her eyes, “you’re no better than half the guys I’ve been with. I’m here for the file, not for whatever you call this.” She cooly turns her head to face front again, leaving you seething.

Your twinge of annoyance was now a bubbling boil.

You slow down before withdrawing your cock from her warmth--Momo lets out the faintest whine of disappointment, betraying her dissatisfied front.

Just as Momo turns her head again to complain, you quickly slam your cock deep inside her. Momo yelps, and you notice her eyes bulge as you move your hips in a circular motion with your cock filled to the hilt, scraping deep inside her pussy. After several seconds of this you grab a makeshift ponytail out of her hair and yank backwards, causing her to gasp and arch her back instinctively. As much as she bothered you with her air of indifference, you had to admit that the image in front of you was the stuff of dreams.

Taking advantage of the highly erotic sight before you and the increased leverage offered by your grasp of her hair, you began to truly fuck her with quick and powerful strokes.

“Take it, Momo,” you grunted, beads of sweat beginning to form on your forehead.

Momo said nothing, emitting only breathless gasps from her open mouth. You noticed that their intensity was gradually increasing, so you increased the speed of your shaft penetrating her young, sinful body. You knew she was enjoying this, but you wouldn’t be satisfied until you broke her facade. You wanted her to lose herself to you.

You speed up even more, and the volume of your skin slapping together increases as her pussy drips wetter and wetter, mixing with your leaking precum. You are slamming your cock into her now, and Momo has to grab on to the table to steady herself. Slowly but surely her pretense was crumbling.

“You want it, don’t you Momo? You want more?”

“Fuck yeah,” Momo gasps hoarsely, struggling to speak with her hair being pulled, “Give it to me...o-oh...fuck, give it to me!”

Satisfied that she had succumbed to her pleasure, you relax your grip on her hair slightly and lean over to growl in her ear.

“I’ll give it to you. I’m gonna make sure you remember this, make sure every time you’re with another man you wish it was me.”

Momo acknowledges your promise with a deep groan, giving you great pleasure as you resumed fucking her gorgeous body.

Your eyes drift downward to her glorious ass, now shining with sweat and jiggling violently with each crash of your cock inside her. Inspired by the sight, you release her hair and put one hand on her hip and begin striking her ass with your other. Momo shrieks in surprise, but quickly looks back at you with lidded eyes while biting her lip to tell you she wanted more.

Again you oblige, and it was quickly becoming clear that lust and pleasure were staging a coup of Momo’s senses. She’s making lots of noise, but nothing intelligible. Nothing but guttural moans interspersed with high-pitched squeals. You continue spanking her ass, alternating cheeks--noticing a deep pink beginning to form on both. She’d most likely be dealing with soreness for several days after this, you think.

“You wanna cum, Momo? Cum for me, I know you want to.”

“Mmmmm...Ah, ah, AH! Unggghh,” comes Momo’s response.

“Come on Momo, fucking cum baby...cum all over this cock,” you shout, sincerely hoping there was no one working in an adjacent floor to hear.

“FUUUUCK!” Momo screams eloquently, suddenly dropping her head as her body begins convulsing. You knew what to expect having slept with her before, but you are nonetheless surprised to see how completely overtaken her body was by pleasure. Her upper body jerks spastically as her legs tremble with your cock plunged deep inside her pussy, all the while letting out a high-pitched whine that turns into a soft whimper. Just a few minutes before she was defiant and happy to throw insults at you...now she was a mewling, writhing mess incapable of speaking. The dark, primal part of you is satisfied by her tacit recognition of your talent.

After a short while, Momo begins to compose herself and lifts her upper body from the table. You take it as a sign to slowly resume taking your cock in and out of her. You decide to give her now glowing pink ass a rest and caress her back, tracing long lines with your nails.

“Mmmmm, that feels good,” Momo says, her eyes still closed, “you fuck me so good.”

You slowly begin ramping up the pace, rolling your hips with each stroke. You want to make sure your cock pleases every inch of Momo’s pussy, and make sure it craves you when she’s alone at night. 

After several minutes of this tender, softer version of lovemaking, Momo comes back to her senses. She arches her back again and turns her head to gaze in your eyes as you continue to take her. She begins to move her ass back and forth on your cock in unison with your own strokes.

“Oh my god, you feel so good in my fucking pussy! Every...fucking...stroke!” Momo gasps, the final words punctuated by the force of her majestic ass crashing against your cock.

“You’re a bad girl, Momo,” you tease, “you like being taken and shown who’s boss, don’t you? You like me grabbing your hair and slapping your ass?”

“Yes!” she gasps, “Yes I love it! Mmmmm...I want you to fuck me until you cum. Fuck me until you cum!”

There was no command in the world easier to follow.

Satisfied that you had fulfilled your vain, immature desire to see her acknowledge your skill as a lover, you now focus yourself on extracting pleasure from the young woman beneath you. You settle into a pace with rough strokes, fiercely pounding her over and over. Your pleasure rises with each thrust, aided not only by the mindblowing caress of her pussy, but by the incredible sight of Momo on all fours before you moaning with each strike of your cock inside her.

“Fuck Momo...I don’t think I have much longer, I’m gonna fucking cum so hard!”

“Yes,” comes the response from Momo, “Yes, yes! Fucking cum baby, I want your cum so bad!”

A few more thrusts and you can feel the point of no return coming. For a brief moment you contemplate cumming inside Momo, to truly claim her. You quickly reconsider, wanting to give her what she truly wanted--to swallow your load.

And so, you quickly withdraw your cock from Momo’s now sopping wet pussy and she instinctively turns around and drops to her knees on the floor. Stroking your cock with great fervor, her mouth wide open begging for what was to come.

“Please give me your cum, please, please! I want it...I need it! Cum for me!”

Your head tilts backward as a long groan escapes your lips. Your cum explodes from your shaft, shooting long, thick ropes of semen into her mouth and onto her cheeks and nose. Over and over, your cum splashes on her beautiful face until you finally reach the end of your orgasm, panting and exhausted. Momo’s face is a pornographic picture of lust, her eyes rolled back in pleasure as she swallows the mass of cum you deposited in her mouth.

“I fucking love your cum,” Momo says as she wipes the remaining cum off her face with her finger and promptly brings it to her tongue before swallowing it down as well.

“I’m glad we were both able to get what we wanted,” you say, struggling to catch your breath.

“Speaking of getting what I wanted…” Momo says, nodding her head to the part of the floor where the USB drive now sits, evidently thrown from the table during the session that had just taken place.

“Right,” you say, suddenly remembering you’re here for work, “make a copy and let’s get out of here.”

“Great,” says Momo, still on the floor with a satisfied smile of content on her face, “Hey, I meant what I said about having you join our team. As much shit as I give you, we could really use someone with your talent.”

“Thanks, but I think I’m better off staying put. Don’t think the Korean government would let me live if I tried defecting.”

“Probably true,” says Momo as she begins picking up her clothes, “Never hurts to ask, though.”

***

A few minutes later, you and Momo had both gotten dressed and copied the file onto a drive for her. Momo disappeared into an adjoining hallway and you set off to traverse the stairwell again. As you prepare yourself for the descent, you also steel yourself for the repercussions of giving the intel to a foreign spy agency. With the information you saw in the file, you knew the Japanese would have to be looped in sooner or later. If it was going to happen eventually, you thought it made the most sense to entrust that intel to the agent on the other side you knew would make sure things got done correctly. As logical as it seemed to you, however, you knew it wouldn’t be taken well back at the office.

You click on your comms link, now knowing there’s nothing to fear. 

“Hey Choa, I’m on my way back to the rendezvous.”

“Oh thank god! That took forever, I was about to call for a tac team!” Choa sighs with audible relief, “I take it you got everything you needed?”

“Got more than I needed, actually,” you say, nervous about Choa’s reaction to what you say next, “Listen, there’s one small thing you should know...”

“You did WHAT?!”

#momo #twice smut #momo smut #male reader #b/g #kpop smut #kpop fanfic #kpop fanfiction

[bestiesenpai]

Study buddy - Choso

Where oh where can I find a Choso-nii to help me with my studies? Where oh wherefore art thou? Femme reader, 2.1k words

Content warnings: incest, that’s it

“I don’t get it!” You whined loudly to yourself, almost to the point of tears as you sit at the dining table, frustration mounting the longer you stare at the screen of your laptop. There’s too many assignments that you need to finish, too many tests you need to study for - it’s all too much.

“What’s wrong?” As you throw your head into your hands, Choso comes around the corner, having heard your small shout. Looking over the table, swamped with textbooks and stacks of papers, his heart breaks a little for you.

“Go away, Choso-nii.” With your forehead pressed against the table, you don’t have the heart to sit up and look at your older brother.

“Not until you look at me, tell me what’s going on.” Smoothing a large hand across your back, he tried to nudge you to turn to him.

“You wouldn’t get it.” He’d never attended university, having gotten a job as soon as he could to help support the family. It wasn’t like you doubted his intellect, but this issue was out of his range.

He pushed and he pulled, but try as he might Choso couldn’t get you to look at him. He could see the angry scribbles on your notebook pages and the way your breathing was slightly laboured as if you were holding back tears. He didn’t want to push you too hard but he didn’t want you to wallow.

“Get up.” He was wrapping his arms around your middle before you could fully comprehend what it is he wanted, and soon you were forced out of your chair and sat back down onto his lap.

“Lemme go.” Your head still hung low, hands covering your face so you wouldn’t have to look at him and his pitying expression. Choso shook his head, resting his own forehead against your shoulder and squeezing you.

“Is it school? Do you want to take a break?”

“No.” You replied immediately, shrugging his head off and grabbing your pencil again. “I can’t, I have a lot to do.” Forcing yourself to scribble down some more words, you ignored the silence and the sigh that followed from Choso.

“But you’re upset, why don’t you-”

“Just stay out of it!” You snapped, clearly not in the mood to be coddled. Choso wasn’t used to you snapping at him like this and it showed in the shocked raise of his brows.

“Baby girl calm down.” Although he said it softly, there was an underlying edge to his tone. Choso shifted you on his lap, drawing you further up his legs and securing you more tightly in his arms.

“M’not a baby.” You mumbled back, instantly regretting how you spoke to him. All Choso ever did was try and help you, try and make your life just a bit easier; it wasn’t fair to him for you to act this way.

“You’re my baby.” Giving you a kiss on the back of your neck, Choso settled his chin on your shoulder. “Now, are you going to take a break?” He expected it when you shook your head no. “Will you let me help you then?”

“I don’t know, nii-chan...this kind of stuff might be too hard for you.” Handing him one of the pages of homework you had, you bit your lip as he read over it. Choso didn’t exactly have the best track record with schooling, often skipping classes to pick up odd jobs or just to sleep the day away.

“We can work on it together.” Putting it back on the table, Choso plucked the pencil out of your hands and started scribbling down what he thought was the right answer.

“Choso-nii, wait! Not like that!”

“Hm, no?” Cracking a smile, he began to tickle your sides as you snatched the pencil back. “Then how should I do it? Like this?”

“S-stop!” You shouted, giggles forcibly rising from your chest. Desperately trying to grab his fingers and hold them away from your sides, you had no choice but to laugh and squirm helplessly.

After a few minutes he relented, handing you back the pencil and letting you catch your breath. A soft smile stayed on his face as he noticed your mood had improved just from him tickling you, the hard crease in your brow and the frown tugging at your lips were gone now.

“Tell me what you’re working on here.” Gesturing toward your laptop, he saw an abundance of open tabs and a slideshow that was barely started.

“That’s one of my finals, I have to make a presentation.” Slumping against Choso’s chest, you huffed indignantly. Humming to himself, Choso clicked through a few of the tabs. He wasn’t familiar with the subject you were presenting on at all, but surely he could help a little bit?

“Let's work on this one first then, it seems to be giving you the most trouble.”

“They’re all giving me trouble.” Pushing your face into the side of his neck, you didn’t try to stop Choso from tidying up your workspace, tucking papers away into folders and pushing unneeded textbooks away.

Just having the table clear of all the daunting assignments was enough to make a slight weight lift off your shoulders. With no visual clutter, things in your mind slowly started to calm down. From your position leant against Choso, you explained the presentation as simply as possible. He flipped through more tabs as you spoke, reading and falling silent except for a few hums.

“I bet we could get a rough draft done by tonight.” He murmured.

“You think so?” His words gave you a little hope, and the reassuring hug he gave your middle even more.

“With a little sister as smart as you? I know so.” Pressing a kiss to the top of your head, he nodded confidently. He smiled when you smiled at the compliment, taking a hand and rubbing up and down your arm. “Let’s get started.”

As the two of you began to work, both diligently reading over the material, Choso’s hands started to wander. Both arms slid from around your waist, one going to rest around your hips as the other settled just under the hem of your shirt.

“What do you think about putting that quote here?” He whispered, pointing to the screen briefly before putting his hand back, letting his fingers creep up a little under your shirt.

“I could try it.” Unaffected by his hand, you typed away on the keyboard. As you breathed, Choso’s hand pushed up under your shirt entirely, hot palm resting on your stomach. Your hands faltered for a moment, but you didn’t say anything.

Silently typing, you tried to ignore Choso’s hand now fully resting just below your breasts. His hand was stopped by the bra you had on, but not for long. Pressing a kiss onto your cheek, he fully tugged down your bra.

“Nii-chan…” A whining protest was on the tip of your tongue, fingers beginning to curl around his wrist and pull his hand away.

“Sshh, don’t worry about what I’m doing. Focus on your work.” Gently twisting your nipple between his fingers, Choso flicked his chin toward the screen. Biting your lip and nodding your head, you did as he said. He was being nice enough to help you with your homework, it was only fair to let him have this.

Lightly massaging your breast, Choso still managed to be helpful and give critiques, aptly splitting his focus between fondling your chest and helping build the presentation. With soft fingers, he worked both nipples to full hardness and watched as they pebbled and peaked under the fabric of your shirt.

“Choso-nii, here too.” Spreading your legs for him, Choso lets you pull his hand from your shirt and down to your bottoms, past the waistband and over your panties. There’s a good amount of slick built up between your legs, seeping into the fabric of your panties and marking them with a large wet patch.

With his other hand taking the spot on your breast, Choso pushes his hand into your panties. Your legs are thrown open wide for him, body completely relaxed against his as you let him do whatever he wants.

Tapping your clit with his middle finger, Choso chuckles under his breath at the reflexive twitches in your legs. He can’t help but do it a few more times until you let out a whine and wiggle your hips for him.

Circling the swollen bud with the tip of his finger, the high moan that leaves your throat is music to his ears and when he presses down on it more firmly, your thighs immediately snap shut on his hand.

“Excited?” Choso teases in your ear, watching as you shamefully reopen your legs. Rubbing your clit with two fingers now, he can feel your hole clenching around nothing. With how much of your juices are on his fingers, it’s easy for them to slip down and press against it.

Steadily pumping his fingers in and out, Choso worked his fingers down to the knuckle, resting his palm snugly against your pelvis and grazing your clit. You’d fully given up on even pretending to still be working, fully laying on Choso as your hands gripped his sleeves.

Drawing his fingers out, Choso began to slowly thrust his fingers in and out, a soft clapping sound of his palm hitting you beginning to sound throughout the room.

“Shit, Choso!” You gasp loudly when his thumb finds your clit, rubbing it in tandem with the motion of his fingers. Your thighs threaten to close in on his hand again, quivering on his lap and fighting to stay open.

Soon your hips are bucking up to meet his fingers, quiet pants falling from your mouth and landing on the side of his face. Clutching your breast tightly in his hand, Choso grinds his thumb on your clit, getting a wave of endorphins himself just from hearing you moan.

You quickly lose the battle of trying to keep your legs spread, nearly fully clamping down on his hand and rendering it immobile. Choso doesn’t mind though, he welcomes whatever reactions you have to him and his touch. All he wants to do is make his little sister happy.

“Are you going to cum?” Swallowing thickly around the words, he breaks out into a silly grin when you nod drunkenly. His wrist and hand are starting to cramp up and the muscles in his arm are beginning to burn, but Choso refuses to slow down even a fraction.

“N-nii-chan, please!” Screwing your eyes closed, you arch your back hard, breath coming out shorter and shorter as your orgasm approaches. It’s unclear to both of you what you’re asking for, but you both know it’s not to stop.

“That’s it baby girl, cum nice and hard for me.” Kissing any part of your face he can reach, Choso’s hand doesn’t stop when you let out a loud moan and your cunt spasms around him. He certainly doesn’t stop as your feet stamp against the floor, the pleasure overwashing your senses almost too much for you to handle. He almost can’t bring himself to stop when your body goes slack and you whine at him to stop, the pleasure turning into pain.

Slipping his hand from your bottoms, Choso stares at his fingers covered in your sticky release. There’s thin strands that spread and break when he pulls apart his fingers and the heady musk that comes from them tastes just as good as it smells.

Slowly fixing your clothes and straightening your back, you fully turn over your shoulder to Choso and kiss him as he pulls his fingers out of his mouth. You can smell and taste a hint of yourself on his lips, his tongue just barely darting out to swipe at yours.

“I think that was a good break, don’t you?” Choso whispers as he breaks the kiss, giving you a quick kiss on the nose before fully pulling away. He takes a mental picture of the blissed out look on your face and the way an easy, dopey smile spreads on your face.

“Yeah.” Nodding, you lean forward and kiss him on the cheek. “Thanks, nii-chan.”

“You’re welcome, baby.” Helping you readjust your position on his lap, Choso feels his heart swell at knowing he helped you relax, made you feel nice and happy as any good caring older brother should. Pulling your laptop closer, Choso reopened the presentation and skimmed the last few words you’d written. “Now, let’s get back to work, alright?”

#tw: incest #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen smut #choso #choso x reader #jujutsu kaisen scenarios #jujutsu kaisen fanfic #jujutsu kaisen imagines