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theowlwrites · 2 months

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Shall we dance? // Bailamos?

Melissa Schemmenti x F!Reader

Cariño: Term of endearment, can be translated as honey/ dear/ darling.

~Just want to clarify that I love Mexican and Italian culture. 🫶🏽

Warnings: no physical description of reader, it is mention that her nationality is Mexican en 2 occasions, consumption of alcohol. Angst, fluff, and a little smut at the end?

Summary: Reader is the new Spanish teacher at Abbott, she goes to a celebration of 5 de Mayo at Barb’s house, were things turn interesting with Melissa.

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“Come on!” Janine was trying for the hundred time to convince you to go to this little get together at Barbara's house “It will be fun!”

Today was 5 de Mayo, and for some reason, in the States, they celebrated it. You have nothing against it, but back in México it goes like any other normal day. Despite that, seeing all the decorations with Mexican themes made you miss your home.

“I've already told you” You close the folder you were working on a look at her “I can't go, I already made some other plans”

The truth was that you didn't have any plans, you just don't feel part of the teacher group just yet. You are the new Spanish teacher at Abbot, just entered this year. Everyone has been nice to you, especially Janine and Jacob. You also have a good relationship with Gregory, but you aren´t really close. When it came to the older teachers, you have no issue talking to Barbara, she is really nice, she sometimes even asks you to help her with her Spanish. But Melissa, she was a different story, she isn´t exactly mean, but she likes to make clear that she preferred anything Italian over Spanish, and that Italian cuisine was better than the Mexican. You never argue, mostly because Melissa intimidates you, but not for the reason she intimidates the other younger teachers, but because you have the biggest crush on her.

So going to this 5 de Mayo party to Barbara's house looks like the perfect place for Melissa to tell you over and over again how Italians do it better. Not really something you are looking forward to.

“Leave the booze to me Barb, I know a guy that can get me the best tequila” At that moment Melissa and Barbara were entering the teacher’s room, interrupting you and Janine.

Barb looks directly to you, ignoring Melissa “Oh good, I was looking for you dear” She takes a sit next to you. “Please can you take care of the music? Maybe you can play some Spanish bangers in that Walkman of yours” She meant your Spotify. All eyes were on you know, making you feel the pressure. “You are coming… right?”

“You know Barbara… I… I don´t think I can make it, I have to...” You were avoiding looking at her, you couldn´t lie to her face, actually you couldn´t lie to anyone’s face, you were a terrible liar.

“Okay, what is it?” Melissa´s voice came from behind you, then she walked to your side and took a sit in front of you. “Why don´t you want to spend time with us?” She had her glasses over her head, leaving a few strands of hair free next to her face, she was raising an eyebrow. She was looking hot.

“It´s not that” Your voice comes out weaker that you expected. “I don´t know, it makes me feel a little… homesick, I guess” It wasn´t entirely a lie, but you couldn´t tell the redhead that she makes you nervous to the point of almost forgetting how to speak English.

“Oh darling” You felt Barbs arm wrap your shoulders. Melissa was still looking at you, but this time with more gentle eyes that before “I can imagine how you feel, but I think this could do you good. You can show us a little bit more of your traditions, I would love to hear about that”

“Yeah girl… we can get to know each other a little bit more” Melissa winked and eye at you, which made your heart beat faster.

With a big sigh, you finally agree “Okay then, I´ll be there at five o´clock”

“You won´t regret it, amigo!” Janine says

“Amiga… with an a” You laugh.

“See you at five o clock then, dear. Don´t forget the music.” Barbara smiles, pleased that she convinced you to go and leaves the room with Janine. Leaving you with Melissa, who was still looking at you.

She stood up and grab her bag, carrying it on her shoulder. “See you soon… cariño” You were so glad that Melissa left immediately after saying those words, otherwise, she would have noticed how your face turned red as a tomato.

Later that day you were at home, putting together a playlist of spanish music. You added some ballads, some more mariachi music, and algo some dancing music, like salsa, cumbia and some bachata, just for fun.

At 5:15 pm you were standing outside Barbara´s house, you have already knocked twice and nobody answered. Maybe you had the location wrong, so you decided to call Janine, but just as you were going to press the call button, a voice from behind called you.

“Hey, cariño, it´s over here” Melissa was standing next to her car on the sidewalk, holding some bags that you assumed contained the tequila bottles. “This way”

You followed her to the back of the house, everyone was there, at the patio. No one was inside the house, that’s way nobody heard you knocking.

“Look what I found in your front door Barb” Melissa was referring to you, as she went straight to the table to settle the bottles. All eyes went to you, for second time in the day. Everyone was there already, with the exception of Ava, that preferred to stay at home watching Desperate Housewives than “going to that lame party” (her words).

“I forgot to tell you we will be at the back. Anway, I´m very glad you came. You bring the music?”

“Of course,” You proceed to connect you phone to the speaker and start reproducing your playlist.

“Now this is a fiesta!” Said Janine while trying to dance at the bit of one song.

You were standing next to the speaker, watching everyone enjoy the party. Barbara has offered you a plate of mini taquitos, that were actually really good. It was probably the music, the Mexican decoration and even the taquitos that made you feel nostalgic, so your mind started wondering through your childhood memories. All those parties with your family, how your father had taught you to dance in those parties, how you mom food tasted. You were so immersed in you thought that didn´t notice when the redhead went to stand right next to you.

“Penny for your thoughts” Her voice snapping you out from your own mind.

“I was just remembering some childhood stuff, that all” You didn’t dare to look at her eyes. And she noticed it, actually she had always notice it, how you would avoid looking directly at her. She always took those moments as opportunities to look at you with more detail. Melissa hadn´t admitted this to anyone, not even Barbara. but she thinks that you are very beautiful, she´s intrigued by you. She likes it when you speak Spanish, you make everything sound better. But she has no idea how to approach those feelings, so she decides to keep her distance too, by not being the nicest or most accessible teacher at Abott. She wanted that to change, and she was going to start working in that today.

“You know… I sometimes feel nostalgic of my home as well.” She drank from the plastic cup she was holding. “I have always lived in Philly, but I don´t see my family as often anymore, and we haven´t had a reunion or a party in so long… I miss that” You looked at Melissa. She was actually telling you something personal, without sarcasm. “But of course, it must be harder for you, being away from your country” She then looked you in the eyes.

“It´s not too bad” You were actually looking at Melissa´s eyes, for mor than 1 second, for the first time, and God they were beautiful, just as her. “I visit them once a year, and they sometimes come visit” There was a silence, both of you looking at everyone else enjoying the party.

“Would you like a paloma?” Melissa asked, with a mischievous grin.

“That´s what you are having?” She nodded. “Yeah, please”

Melissa served you a paloma (soda with tequila), and from that moment you never parted her side. Both of you kept talking, laughing, at some point you teaching her some Spanish, and she teaching you some Italian. It was probably the booze, but you started feeling how Melissa was getting more comfortable around you. She was being handsy, placing her hand around your arm, sometimes over your hand, and some other times around your waist. Soon she started leaning against you, caressing your hair, holding your waist longer. She was flirting. Neither of you were drunk drunk, you were still perfectly conscious and in you five senses, which made you very anxious but excited about this sudden change in Melissa´s attitude.

It was already 9:00 pm, Janine, Gregory and Jacob had already left, tomorrow was school day. Barbara, Melissa and you were sitting around the folding table in the middle of the patio. Your music still playing. The three of you has stop drinking like an hour ago, to sober up, and were just chatting. And even without the effects of the alcohol, Melissa was still being nice to you, maybe a little less handsy, but still very friendly.

Barbara excuse herself to go to the bathroom. A comfortable silence between Melissa and you, when a salsa began to play at the background.

“God, I love that salsa, I used to dance it all the times at parties, with anyone, even alone, I just wanted to dance it” You smile as you remember. Unconsciously you closed your eyes and started moving in your chair, humming the song. Unaware of the way Melissa was looking at you.

“Shall we dance?” You snap your eyes open. She offers you her hand to you, already standing up next to you.

“What?”

“Bailamos?” She repeats, and this time you nodded. She holds her hand until you are standing next to her. She places her free hand on your waist, keeping you close to her, while her other hand holds yours at the level of her face. And you start dancing.

It´s a slow salsa, so it is easy to dance, but you have the feeling that even if it was a faster rhythm, Melissa would dance like if she had done it all her life.

You feel Melissa´s eyes on you, she´s smiling. She moves her arm, so it surrounds your waist. The sudden closeness makes you lose your balance a little, Melissa holds you tighter, preventing you for falling. You both laugh.

Her face inches away from yours, her eyes going from your eyes to your lips. She caressed your cheek with her other hand, and pulls you closer, closing the space between you.

The kiss is sweet, slow. You both take your time to feel it, you enjoy it. Your arms around Melissa´s neck, keeping her close to you. Soon the kiss turns a little more heated, Melissa´s tongue asking for permission to pass your lips, to which you happily submit.

You still can taste a little bit the alcohol from earlier, and you taste the sweetness of Melissa. Really there is no other way to describe it, it feels and taste sweet to be kissing her like this.

You break the kiss until you realize you need to take a breath, but not breaking the embrace. You are still so close to each other Melissa can basically fell how your heart is beating fast.

“I never thought Italians were this good at salsa dancing” That´s all you said, making Melissa laugh.

“We are good at everything darling, but you do it amazing yourself, cariño, give yourself some credit.” She kissed you again. “Let me drive you home.” Melisas whispered to your ear, you just nodded.

You both said goodbye to Barbara, not without offering to help her clean, to which she refused. Once inside Melisa´s car she couldn’t stop eyeing you, she kept a hand in your thigh. You couldn’t stop looking at her either, and honestly, if it wasn´t for the seatbelt, you would be on top of her long time ago.

You arrive home, Melissa opens your door, helping you out. And before she could say anything, you were kissing her. This time was passionate, full of desire and lust. Melissa was against the car, her hands on your hips. You were leaning on her, your hand on her hair.

“Come inside, please” You didn’t mean to sound do needy, but you couldn´t hide it.

“I would absolutely love it cariño, but tomorrow is school day, and I need another change if clothes. I just wanted to make sure you arrive safe and sound.” She was keeping her hands on your hips, but this time with a stronger grip, trying to create a little more space between you tow.

“Please” You took Melissa´s hands away from your hips, letting you lean to her once again. “Por favor” (please) You whispered to her ear. Now her arms were surrounding you shole waist. You started kissing her earlobe, descending to her neck. Melissa was in a trance. “Te necesito” (I need you)

“You are making this very difficult for me, cariño” Now it was Melissa´s voice the one that came out shaky, which made you feel proud.

“It doesn´t have to be difficult, you can just come in”.

“Let´s make a deal, hon… I promise that tomorrow I will be here, with a bottle of wine, and we can do whatever you want, but you have to promise to speak I little more Spanish to my ear, deal?” That mischievous grin was back on Melissa´s face, and you loved it.

“¿Te gusta cuando hablo español?” (Do you like when I speak Spanish?) You said as innocent as you could.

“I have no idea of what you just said, but keep doing that you will pay the price tomorrow”

“Trato… deal” You agreed. She kissed you once again, this time keeping it less heated and shorter. You took a few steps away from Melissa, trying to pull yourself together, and trying to ignore you soaked underwear. If Melissa wasn´t going to spend this night with you, you had some plans before going to bed, and as if she could read your mind, she added…

“Oh, and cariño… don´t touch yourself tonight, It will make tomorrow more fun” She winked her eye to you. It wasn’t a question; it was an order. “You can do that for me, right hon?” You really wanted to release all this tension tonight, but you couldn´t say no to Melissa.

“I promise” you said

“Good girl” She went inside her car. “See you tomorrow cariño, sleep tight” She left, leaving you horny as hell.

God, you couldn’t wait for tomorrow…

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Okay, so this idea pop into my mind while I was watching Shall we dance?, I really love that movie, and I love Lisa’s character. 🥹

Hope you like it, and let me know if you want a second part 🫣

#lisa ann walter #abbott elementary #wlw post #lesbian #bisexual #melissa schemmenti soft #melissa schemmenti fanfic #melissa schemmenti fluff #melissa schemmenti x reader #melissa schemmenti smut

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ur-dad-satan · 4 months

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I Have Spicy Obey Me! Headcannons (pt. 4)

I'm just gonna be talking about my different spicy head cannons for my little Obey me men. If you don't agree, that's fine but I will not take criticism still. <3

MDNI!! Please don't fight me on this.

Beel and Dia both like having their nipples played with. I don't know why, but I really feel like these two beefy men with their tigole biddies would love having their nips stimulated and their tiddies played with. Like squeeze them, kneed them, flick them, lick them, suck them, just anything to stimulate them and you'll have them shaking and begging at your every touch.

Sim and Barbs would get overstimulated easily. Those two are constantly so cool, calm, and collected, you can't blame me for thinking this. They would probably be all calm and collected during until they're edged, or it feels way too good. Use this power wisely and make them squirm.

Beel would fuck for his favorite foods. If he was hungry enough, he would be down to fuck like MC specifically and maybe even Barbs if they made his favorite food. Don't get me wrong, I'm not calling my man a food slut, I'm just saying that I if the food is good enough, and he was in the mood for whatever reason, he would fuck as a way of saying thank you.

Luci, Dia, Mam, Levi, Beel, and Sat are all REALLY vocal during. Whether it's moans and groans, names, whimpers, or anything else, these men specifically will be making some type of noise and it'll be loud and non-stop. These mfs (MC fuckers) are the type to moan your name like it's the only word they know.

MC would introduce everyone (except Luke) to wildly inappropriate songs for fun. MC was just listening to their slutty human music and Mam just so happened to walk in and now he walks around the HOL singing the chorus to CPR by Cupcakke. Asmo asked MC what they were listening to one day and now he can't stop saying "I wanna paint your face like you're my Mona Lisa" to just about everyone. Thanks to MC, both Dia and Beel know what a WAP is. Satan? He's absentmindedly singing Gasolina in perfect Spanish. No one knows it, but MC has sung Degrade Me by TX2 to Lucifer anytime they were feeling "frisky".

MC has everyone's (except Luke's) DDD ringtones set as said wildly inappropriate human world songs. Luci's is Side to Side by Ariana Grande. Mam's is Daddy by Cera Gibson. Levi's is Dangerous Woman by Ariana Grande. Tan's is Masochism Tango by Tom Lehrer. Asmo's is I'm so Hot by Chrissy Chalpecka. Beel's is Taste by Stray Kids. Belphie's is Unfuckwitable by Zayn. Dia's is Call Out My Name by The Weekend. Barbs's is Feeling Good by Michael Bublé. Sim's is Unholy by Sam Smith and Kim Petras. Solo's is WAP by Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion.

All the demons can manipulate their bodies any way they want. Now this is definitely based on that one R34 comic I saw where Levi could open his mouth so wide it looked like his face was slit open and he had really fucking sharp teeth. I think all the demons can do that, but it would be different for each of them. Like they all have sharp ass teeth in their demon forms, but they all have ways to contort their bodies however they please and MC a hundred percent takes advantage of it.

#obey me shitpost #obey me crack #obey me mc #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me brothers #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #obey me simeon #obey me songs #obey me smut #obey me undateables

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juleswrites223 · 2 months

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The Fateful Encounter

Season 1: Episode 1

Context: The duo (Carlos & you) meet a scared Charles at superstore, alone. They help him and take him back to their safe house where he joins them. While Charles' younger brother, Arthur gets rescued by a certain Dutch.

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F1 apocalypse masterlist

“Come to daddy.” You say as you bash a zombie’s head in with your beloved barbed baseball bat.

“Daddy?” Carlos says bemusedly, you raise your eyebrow in question as he clarifies further, “thought it’d be mommy no?”

“Just said what felt right, ya know in the moment.” You explain your choice of wording.

This is the type of mundane conversation you miss. The situation is far from normal but being with Carlos and talking to him makes it a bit more normal. You’re grateful, for any type of normality to be honest. Being stuck in a zombie apocalypse is far from ideal.

You and Carlos are responsible for grocery runs, getting foods for the week and anything medical that we come across that can potentially aid you. You have a routine, once a week you and Carlos equipped with guns and weapons go to the grocery stores in the city and raid it to get rations for the week. It’s risky and you rarely encounter someone who isn’t the walking dead until now.

“Wait, I think I heard someone crying.” You say cautiously to your partner.

“It’s probably one of those monsters.” Carlos says ready to shoot them if they approach the currently barren superstore.

You go over to the cashier’s counter and peek underneath it and see a man in his mid 20s, asleep yet lightly crying.

“Carlos! Come here quick.” You say urgently as your eyes widen seeing the alive man under the counter.

Carlos comes to you and you both share a look. This man is clearly alive and well, you know you need to help him so you decide to wake him up.

“Hey wake up.” The man murmurs a bit, still not waking up so you decide to slap him and he jolts awake.

“Good to see you’re not a zombie.” Carlos jokes to show that that duo means no harm.

“Hey you okay? What’s your name?” You ask him.

“I’m Charles, please I need your help.” The man babbled hurriedly.

"Hey hey calm down we'll help you. We have a safehouse, outside the city, it's pretty safe there. You can come with us." You console the trembling man.

Charles quickly hears the groaning from a zombie approaching the store. As he fumbles with gun in his hands, Carlos takes the bat from your hands and quickly walks over to the zombie and bashes its skull in with the bat until the zombie is completely dead.

"Let's go before more arrive." You tell the boys.

You guys finish your grocery run and get in the car with Charles in tow. While Carlos is driving, you turn around, lean your head against the seat and ask to Charles who seems lost in his own thoughts, "I meant to ask this earlier, but were you by yourself?"

This seems to bring him back to reality. "Um well I was separated from my little brother a while back and just been trying to find him since." Charles mutters sadly. You feel a pang of sadness hearing this, being separated from family, not knowing whether they're even alive or dead is upsetting so you don't blame him for being despondent.

"I hope he's alive and well" Is all you can offer as a comfort response while Carlos' dark eyes focus on the road and the sun beyond it which seems to be setting.

After a hour, they arrive at abandoned cabin near the woods, the chain link fence is tall, enough to ensure no zombies come through. As the car is parked, you take the ammunitions bag while telling Charles to pick up the bag containing food stuffs.

"This is the place to be if you want to be safe." You brag about the safe house.

"Is there anyone else with you guys?" Charles asks, clearly impressed with the safe house and wondering if you both are the only people here.

"Ustedes han vuelto (You guys are back)." An older man, clearly spanish, calls out, as he walks over to where you all are standing with a German Shepard in tow. "I see you met someone, ¿Está todo claro? (he all clear?)." He asks as he scratches his chin and tilts his head as if trying to figure out Charles.

"Sí, lo revisé, sus signos vitales parecen estar bien y no tiene fiebre ni marcas de mordida. (yeah i checked, his vital seem okay and no fever or bite mark)." Carlos replies back in spanish while Charles wonders what they are talking about.

"Uh Charles this is Fernando, he's the one who actually rescued me. Don't worry he's not as grumpy as he looks." You introduce the monegasque to the older spanish man.

"Good to meet you sir." Charles replies.

"Sir? See you brats, that's how you should refer to me. Good to see another person who isn't muerto (dead)." Fernando chortles as he slaps Charles shoulder as everyone walks inside the house.

"You are a part of our crew now." You gush to the man as you wrap an arm around his shoulders.

"But you're gonna have to learn how to handle a gun if you wanna survive. I'm gonna teach you tomorrow so be ready at dawn." Carlos says.

“Carlos is an amazing teacher so worry not.” You comfort Charles noticing his worried expression.

Meanwhile….

A certain Dutch is cruising the streets in his car. He has a certain goal in mind: to get enough food rations and medical supplies for himself. Goal achieved so now he heads back to his safe house. A certain commotion catches his eye and then he hears a gunshot. He knew this meant there was someone alive trying to hold their own against these zombies.

He quickly goes towards the sound and sees a young man perched on top of a caravan with a sniper rifle. He scanned the surroundings and notice there were a few zombies around, not many to be consider as a hoard so he quickly took his weapons and fought off the few zombies and helped the young man come down.

“You okay kid?” Max asked the terrified 23 year old boy.

“Thank you for helping me.” He says breathlessly.

“No problem, I’m Max, what’s your name?” He asks the boy as he leads him to his car.

“I’m Arthur.” He replies, pausing before the car looking hesitant.

“What? Car not to your liking?” Max jokingly asks noticing the boy’s hesitation.

“No no nothing like that, it’s just that caravan seems useful, we should take it no?” Arthur says to the Dutch.

“Good thinking, can you drive?” Max asks the monegasque as he nods as a response.

As Arthur takes the caravan, Max instructs him to follow his car and they head back to his safe house.

Both Leclerc brothers are safe for now but they have no idea what the future holds in store for them. Will their new groups help them survive on this post apocalyptic Earth or will they succumb to the madness of becoming a zombie?

a/n: I am planning a whole series for this. I'll add you to the taglist if you want. I will release a few more chapters then make a masterlist so stay tuned. Enjoy!!!

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sammyhasspammy · 3 months

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My BroZone Human Designs (+ Some Explanations!)

My post with my human AU!

Their father was black while their mom was Hispanic. Obviously, Floyd ended up being the lightest of them and takes after their mom the most

They all know varying degrees of Spanish

Though they would change up their hairstyles sometimes during the performance, JD insisted they look as similar as they could since fans liked it, so they had "iconic" styles for the group. Those with 4c hair had high tops while Bruce and Floyd took this half-part style

Age: 41

Languages: Fluent in English and Spanish

He ended up becoming the shortest of his brothers and it bothers him every day

You can hear his flip-flops flopping from a mile away and it drives Branch crazy

I think his hair got darker cause he tried to dye his hair after he found a few white hairs and ended up going too dark with it, but he kept it

Kept his high-top for sentimental reasons

Looks the most like their dad

OCD haver #1

Age: 39

Languages: Fluent in English and Spanish, learning Portuguese (Brandy is Brazilian to me <3)

Hairy chest cause brandy likes it

Teaching all his kids Spanish he is not letting them forget their heritage

Usually was the one helping their grandma in the kitchen after their parents' death but was also interested in it before. Most of the recipes he makes now are still ones that are from his childhood

Also master mixologist... for trolls sized drinks. He tried to make drinks for island goers before, but turns out that making a drink that is basically twice your size is hard and inefficient, so he taught Brandy how to make them!

Age 36

Languages: Fluent in English and Spanish. Learned French and Chinese as a hobby

Spoke to Viva in Spanish a LOT, especially during rough times when she was stressed and would start just rambling in Spanish. If it wasn't for her, he wouldn't be so fluent

When they were younger, people thought he was younger than Floyd because he was so tiny, but then he became the tallest

His hair got stained green while at the gold course, but once they left it he kept dying it green

Age: 33

Languages: Fluent in English and Korean (Don't... don't ask), knows some Hindi, knows VERY little Spanish

JD was devastated to hear that Floyd had forgotten 90% of his Spanish

He had spent a few years with the rock trolls and was best friends with Barb for a while, that's where he learned Hindi (I headcanon her as Indian). When she was a teenager she also gave him an awful stick-and-poke on his back, not even Floyds brothers know about it

Went gray for a while in between leaving Brozone and joining the punk trolls, but I don't have a theory as to why yet

When they were younger, Floyd would straighten his hair in order to look more like Bruce in order for them to match. Bruce hated this but couldn't stop Floyd from doing it. Floyd is embarrassed by how poorly he straightened it before.

Very nice and/or low-tempered to most people, but he is ruthless when it comes to JD. Branch has heard Floyd yell the worst insults known to man to JD after being picked on by him, but it's their little way of communicating with each other and is, usually, affectionate. It's a cycle at this point. JD makes fun of Floyd, Floyd gets "pissed," then JD does it again cause he thinks it's funny

Age: 21

Languages: Fluent in English, knows very little Korean and the most basic Spanish ever

JD was also devastated to hear about Branch not speaking Spanish

Doesn't remember shit about their parents. Every time his brothers reminisce on them he just stands there, confused

Also kept his high top for sentimental reasons, but after TBT he started experimenting a bit more

OCD haver #2

Extra Branch one (With banter, check ID for the banter in text if it's hard to read)

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theprissythumbelina · 3 months

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So you want to write about horses.

Specifically, you want to write about horses in your medieval-inspired fantasy novel, rpg, or daydream fantasy. Knights in shinning armor on noble steeds, damsels in distress(or not!) on fine prancing mount, or an evil sorcerer cackling on a fierce charger above your poor tandem MCs.

Whatever it is you're imagining, a medieval horse appears. But you know nothing about horses. I can help.

(If you would like to begin with my first basic Basics post, start here)

^ When thinking knight, you're probably imagining a horse like this.

Preface: When talking about fiction, there is always a question of historical accuracy. That is wholly up to you. But you will at least, after reading this, know more of the historical fact involving horses, and certainly know about some of the more commonly-complained about fallacies involving horses in media.

Now, the above still is from the film Ladyhawke (1985), which is often credited for popularizing the Friesian breed in the United States. I can almost guarantee you have see a Friesian in a film or on TV. The recent series Shadow and Bone had a central character ride a Friesian in one episode. They epitomize the romantic nobility and grace of knights. Except they don't.

The horse you see above came into existence in 1879, primarily as a harness and agricultural use horse. Horses known as Friesian horses have existed since the 11th century, but those horses were completely different from the breed created in the 19th century. The modern Friesian is a trotting breed, made to pull carriages and look beautiful doing it. They have a long back, short neck, and due to inbreeding, a host of nasty genetic problems including dwarfism, aortic rupture, hydrocephalus, and megaesophagus.

However, breeds that trace ancestry back to beyond the middle ages do exist, and they have been breed to look much the same for generations. Introducing:

The Barb/Berber Horse

^Kinda just looks like A Horse™

The Barb comes from North Africa, and was spread into Europe through the Muslim conquest of Spain, where the breed mixed with the native Andalusian breed to create the Spanish Jennet, which is possibly the most widely successful horse breed in all of history. The Jennet is currently extinct*, but due to its durability, it was the horse used by the Spanish AND the British to invade the Americas, and descendants of the Jennet survive in local breeds from Argentina to Canada.

*a revitalization breed does exist of the same name

The Andalusian/Lusitano/Pure Raza Espanol

^The true Fabio of horses, known for thick flowing locks and sweet dispositions

Possibly the horse that most strongly resembles the ancient knighly horse, this noble creature used to be the preferred horse of film, before the Friesian rise in popularity. Horses of Spanish bloodlines are Andalusian, horses of Portuguese bloodlines are Lusitano, but the characteristics of both breeds are nearly identical. They are also known for a fancy 'high stepping' movement, in which they raise their knees higher than other breeds naturally.

The Arabian

^Note the narrow, 'dished' face and raised tail, breed characteristics

The ancient horse of the desert, made famous through books such as The Black Stallion, King of the Wind, and films such as Hildago. These horses are known for their stamina and intelligence, and were traditionally used as war horses by the desert tribes of the Arabian Peninsula. The Arabian has descendants in almost all modern breeds, as it is used to add strength and stamina to the original stock, despite being a relatively small horse. During the Napoleonic wars, this horse became the prized war horse of Europe as well, with Napoleon himself preferring to ride Arabians into battle.

The Mongolian Horse

^Thick head, thick body, this horse is made to survive winter on the steppes

Introduced to Europe from the Hunnic invasions that ended the rule of Rome, the Mongolian horse is made to survive, thrive, and run in harsh cold weather. This horse allowed Ghengis Khan and his soldiers to conqure one of the largest empires to ever exist, from Korea to Poland. This compact horse would have mixed with the native stock of Russian, Eastern European, and Germanic tribes to help create the ancient northern horses, resulting in a thicker breed of horse in the north, and a lighter breed of horse in the south of Europe. Modern-day pony breeds such as the Exmoor, Fjord, Icelandic, and other have been found to have genetic ties to the Mongolian horse.

These horses do not exactly look like the modern image of knights on massive horses, but it is useful to remember that 1. people back then were a lot smaller and 2. horses back then were a lot smaller. Of course, there were hundreds of other local breeds during the middle ages, but many have been modernized and become today's sport, work, or pleasure horses.

During the middle ages, horses were not actually defined by breed. They were defined by the work the horse was suited and trained to preform. There were five main types of medieval horses.

The Destrier

Also called The Great Horse for its size, strength, and price, this horse was the renown mount of knights and kings in battle. These horses were highly trained for battle, and could be taught to do such things as striking out at soldiers in front, kicking at soldiers from the back, and even leaping all four feet in the air to protect it's rider. They would wear the most armor, and these horses would likely be closest in appearance to the modern Andalusian.

^Ornate heavy armor on a model horse. This armor was made for a horse not much more than 15hh, what today would be a small horse.

The Courser/The Charger

A lighter horse than the destrier, the courser is also a warhorse, highly trained and well-bred, but a little less expensive. A knight might not be able to afford a destrier, especially as a minor knight, but every knight should have a courser. The Spanish Jennet is the epitome of the medieval courser, and in fact was the horse used by Richard II. According to Shakespeare, the horse's name was White Surrey, although other sources claim the horse was Roan Barbary, and was a Barb or Berber horse*.

*Bought from Spain and likely a cross of Spanish and African blood, so a Jennet. But Jennet was also a classification of a horse type in those days, so, sources are muddled.

The Rouncey

The 'average' horse of the time, this horse was used mainly for riding, but could sometimes be ridden into battle if trained properly, and were the preferred horse for lower-class fighters such as archers or men-at-arms. As it described a riding horse, these horses came in all shapes and sizes, from all lineages, and in all colors. In peacetime they could be used to draw carriages or work fields. A proud and expensive destrier would never be caught pulling a plow.

The Palfrey

A highly-bred, highly trained horse, this horse is a high quality riding horse known for a specific gait, called an ambling gait. This horse had a special pattern of moving its feet that gave the rider a considerably more comfortable ride than the traditional 4 gaited horse. After the middle ages, these horses almost disappeared, only to be recovered in the Americas in the form of 'gaited' horses such as the Paso Fino, the Rocky Mountain Horse, the Missouri Foxtrotter, and the Tennessee Walking Horse. The Icelandic horse has also retained the special Tölt gait that may* be the exact gait of medieval ambling horses.

*may, I am not a gaited horse expert.

The Packhorse

This describes any kind of horse, usually a rouncey, that is used not for riding but to carry supplies. Packhorses could also be mules, donkeys, and ponies, so long as they could carry weight for long miles. These were supply horses, carrying food, weapons, tents, whatever else may be needed.

Knights, Horses, and the Battlefield

^ What an incredible creature of power and nobility. The man is fine too, I guess.

Now, if you have seen the above scene, you have probably seen The Hollow Crown, a historical drama with a few late Medieval battle scenes. In these scenes, knight clashes against knight in a furious charge, leading to pitched battles on horseback. I'm not going to say that never happened, but by and large cavalry was directed against infantry, not other cavalry, or used to conduct maneuvers requiring speed and surprise, such as a charge, a circling maneuver, a bluff retreat and most importantly, to chase down routing enemy soldiers. A knight on horseback was most effective in close quarters against unmounted and surprised soldiers. Lances were the primary weapon, allowing a mounted warrior length to spear and batter down at enemies, and a sword was secondary, as it had a shorter length, and would be used if a mounted warrior was surrounded by infantry or in battle against another knight. Throughout the medieval period, horses sometimes were removed from the fight all together due to unfavorable land, and kept in reserve to either help the army flee or to chase down the fleeing enemy.

Hungry for more?

There are many sources out there to learn more about the medieval period and knights in particular. I would highly recommend that you not look at Medieval Times sources, if only because better sources are out there. I enjoy the videos produce by Jason Kingsley CBE (Yes, that Jason Kingsley CBE) on his Modern History TV YouTube Channel, and find them to be accurate as far as I'm aware.

^ Jason Kingsley and his horse Warlord, in costume. I've sent marriage proposals but I've not yet received a reply.

That's all for this post. I'll have more when I feel like it, and send me questions if you want to know more about specific things or need a writing question answered

Reblogs welcome and encouraged

@jacqueswriteblrlibrary for wider reach

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belphiesgirlfriend · 9 months

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Obey me! Brothers music taste headcanons

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more like ramblings than headcanons tbh but i had this stuck in my head and needed to get it out, also feel free to send requests for diff headcanons!

Cw’s: none!

Little bit satirical (i over exaggerate sometimes cuz it’s funny) but pretty in character overall i thinkk

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Lucifer:

• You know this motherfucker listens to classical music and classical music only cuz he’s boring

• Okay but jokes aside i see him listening to like 30’s 40’s 50’s music especially the love songs.

• Like straight up fallout 4 soundtrack music, he’d listen to it while doing paperwork or unwinding

• He’d definitely be really prideful (no duh) about his taste in music, he’d feel all fancy and refined when he tells people

• Type of dude to be like “modern music simply can’t compare to the classics…” shut up grandpa we get it u know bach’s zodiac sign, penis size, and mothers maiden name

• Wants to be different so bad, he’d strictly listen to music from his vintage record player or some shit cause it’s the “most authentic” way to listen, fr acts like a manic pixie dream girl (he’d hit me upside the head if he heard me say that sorry luci🫶)

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Mammon:

• r&b and spanish music

•but i feel like he’d like 2000s party music from all the clubbing and casinos

• def a weekend listener and like 90’s rap

• but also like i wouldn’t be surprised if he listened to some 90s rock too

• he’d listen 2 sublime or nirvana or local h (i’m projecting on the last one)

• but anyways he’d be a #1 rihanna fan he’d blast her music in his room but then deny liking her💀make it make sense!!

• also he knows her best album is loud CAUSE HE HAS TASTE!!

• also tyler the creator i get the vibe he’d love him

• kali uchis fan too

•ALSO i feel like he had a phase where he listened to juice wrld and was like “these cheating lying females….” after he got his heart broken by a witch YOU CANG TELL ME IM WRONG😭😭 it’s okay though cause he’s embarrassed by it now

• oh childish gambino too duh forgot about him

ALSO LET ME MENTION DINERO IS LITERALLY HIS SONG ITS ACTUALLY HIS

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Levi:

• this one’s gonna be real fucking short IM SORRYYY

• he listens to anime openings and game soundtracks strictly

• that’s literally all i can think of dude

• he’d be like “i don’t have time for normie music…”

• his room is literally that old caramelldansen meme from 2019/2020

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Satan:

• this one was harder for me to pinpoint

• first instinct would be classical music but it’s canon he likes ska music too so 🤷‍♀️

• i really do feel like he’d listen to all types of music, like a true jack of all traits, if he likes it he likes it so his playlist is allllll over the place

• for some reason i get a vibe he’d really like 80s music in particular though

• the song that pops into my head is who can it be now? by men at work idk why

• maybe even older music i feel like he’d like sam cooke

• OH both him and belphie would like mazzy star and fiona apple idk why but they would

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Asmo:

• okay crucify me for this one but…mitski I JUSG FEEL LIKE HE WOULD

• but i also see him loving lady gaga a lot cuz he has taste

•omg he’d listen to old katy perry too

•but yea also probably lil nas x he’d have a celeb crush on him

• oh tyler the creator too with his gay ass, him and mammon both love him, they def have done a duet to see u again

• he’d be a barb probably defend nicki too😭

• and as much as it pains me to say it, he’d fucking listen to ayesha erotica and be like “this is so good!!!”, hed post a devilgram story with one of her songs and then get cancelled on twitter

• “I made a severe and continuous lapse of judgement…” and then did the same thing a week later

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Beel:

• type of guy when you ask him what music he listens to he goes “idk i don’t really listen to music”

• he legitimately looks up “hype playlist” on youtube to work out and that’s the extent of it

• really can’t see him being a big music guy

• if u invited him to a concert or something he’d go though for food

•he’d give you a piggy back ride so u can see better

• tbh if u were to put on music he would not care much no matter how good/bad it is

• you could walk in on him working out and literally listening 2 cbat or some shit

• HE LITERALLY IS CBAT GUY😭 he’d be like “i always use this song when i’m working out..

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Belphie:

• emo fucker

• i feel like he’d like emo/ 90s rock ( but more “rockish” than mammons 90’s rock)

• but he’d also love any more relaxing music with softer vocals

• he’d be a deftones fan I KNOW GHATS FUCKING BASIC AND UR ROLLING UR EYES BUT LISTEN

• they have the combination of 90s rock but also more soothing calming vocals, theyd literally b perfect

• and for that reason his favorite albums r koi no yokan and saturday night wrist, also their self titled,

• would call mammon a poser for his music taste “nirvana isn’t even *real* rock idiot🙄”

• but nah, also like i said in satans fiona apple and mazzy star fan

• he’d suck so bad though he’d go on twitter and be like, “if you like deftones ur a poser” (while being their number 1 fan, fucking brat) then turn off his phone and take a nap for the funny

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chrollohearttags · 1 year

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AOT boys and their favorite female rappers

📝: because I’m bored, sad and needed a good laugh. Y’all forgive me for this 😭 please don’t take me seriously.

eren

100% on board with the fact that he loves himself some ice spice

subconsciously says ‘like’ after every word now, and you can’t tell him he ain’t hot shit either.

bout broke his damn fingers trying to post a pic with the caption ‘how could I lose if I’m already chose?’

that’s his girl fr and nobody better not say shit about her either. #1 stan.

bonus: he loves flo milli just as much! be singing conceited to the top of his lungs.

mans just loves some bad bitch music.

armin

baby is a barb first and human second.

nicki is his girl until the day he dies.

‘that’s the queen. Nobody’s taking her place, period.’

raps both parts of Roman’s Revenge like somebody got a gun to his head. (he be doing her mannerisms and everything!)

recites her monster verse like it’s the national anthem.

was on that burner account going crazy during the infamous beef. And to this day, still mad at anybody who goes against her.

connie

cardi is his girl

“That’s my cousin, on my momma side. I’m for real.”

his source? trust him bro.

be living when she raps in spanish and yeah he knows every word. (He def got a cutout of her album cover hanging in his room.)

him and armin have had their fair share of arguments.

be hanging out the window of the hellcat screaming tomorrow 2.

jean

head hottie in charge, you already know. Megan stan all day everyday!

does the little ‘ahh’ without realizing.

totally standing by the fact that big ole freak is his favorite song.

plays her twerk vids on loop for like an hour.

“Y’all think Pardi can fight? Be honest.”

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devildom-doll · 7 months

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The Obey Me characters at MC’s Latino/Hispanic Party 🫠

A/N: Happy Hispanic Heritage Month!!¡¡!¡ I am not sorry for this. The only thing I’m sorry for is my grammar. Remember this is joke, okay? ùwú

Word Count: 625 words (I think, idk, didn’t count)

TLDR: just read the title, man xD

-Lucifer be talking with MC’s relatives, eating his pan con cafésito; probably telling them about how much his pendejo brothers don’t let him sleep at night. But also, he unintentionally brags about them cuz he loves them so damn much.

-Mammon be gambling with some of the drunk tiós; probably playin Lotería or somthn. He’s gonna lose, of course, and they’re gonna trash talk him but he speaks fluent Spanish so he’s gonna tire himself out and have nothing left. He’s gonna have to ask your abuelita for some dinero.

-Leviathan is playing video games with the primos who like anime, then he’s gonna realize interaction with people is a pain and he’s gonna lock himself in the room where someone’s baby is randomly sleeping.

-Satan tried learning some Spanish before coming to the party, but then he realized Lucifer is fluent af, now he tryna hunt Luci down with the piñata bat, jejeje. Then he’s gonna get drunk with the cool primos… drunk to the point where he’ll be fluent by morning.

-Asmodeus be dancing to Shakira and Daddy Yankee, and probably get concerning stares from your religious abuela telling you he needs el amor de Cristo. He probably gonna flirty with the tiás and brag about you being his amor. (he just learned how to say “te amo,” and he tryna find you… he drunk too)

-Beelzebub ate eveything he ate the pozole, y los tácitos, y los tamales, y las pupusas, y las empanadas… el come de todo. El taquero is probably tired of seeing him and he keeps asking the relatives what each food is called and how to make it.

-Belphegor tomando siestas con el bebe y con Levi porque interaction is painful. Actually, he was with Beel earlier, and he takes note of the food Beel eats so both of them can find the recipes when they get home… if they actually do go home…

-Diavolo talks to all the relatives, like all of them, he says goodbye to all of them when it’s time to leave too. He probably is the drunk tío. Also, he speaks fluent Spanish. He probably plays games with the family and plays with los primitos too. Lord Diavolo doesn’t exist anymore; he’s Señor Diavolo now.

-Barbatos be helping in the kitchen making the food that the family is gonna eat (Beel too). Family be impressed, he makes some good ass food and knows damn well that Dia is gonna demand Hispanic human food to be served at RAD. He’s got the hands that perfectly shape las tortillas, people be impressed. (Also, he says sí mi Señor cuz mega lul)

-Luke is playing with los primitos, he got on the jumper, hit the piñata, and he had some pan dulce con leche. Then he got tired, and he be laying, stomach down on the couch or some random room waiting to leave. (Luke was the baby in that room btw jeje)

-Simeon also be helping the the kitchen, making the sweet stuff and preparing the coffee. 100% got along with your religious abuela; oradon y hablaron a sus vidas porque Simeon es un abuelo también. Your family loves him the most, probably, next to Luci and Barb.

-Solomon speaks fluent Spanish… cuz there’s a spell that makes him do that. He talked to some relatives, he probably scared your religious abuela con la brujería. Simeon and Barb kept him out of the kitchen. He’s just vibin tbh, probably sitting with you as you watch your demon/angel harem interact with your familia.

MC (tu 🫵🏽) is watching your demon/angel harem interact with your familia. Also, you comforting the sleepy boys telling them, “si ya vamos, solo un poquito mas…”

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