#also; I’m going to be tagging my personal vents as pity party if you want to block my annoying shit

[fictitious-little-stitious]

This is long. At the risk of making things more awkward for myself, here’s venting and trying to organize some thoughts. Attempted metaphors and similes for the state of my fanfic experiences. Heads up: insecurities, doubt, and the like.

My experience on here is like being at a bar or a party with several people. Everyone is there for basically the same thing and having a nice enough time. I’m having a great time even! There’s people I know and there’s talk of what we enjoy or what’s new. After laughing along with others or listening intently, I finally think of something witty or insightful of my own to contribute, so I build up the courage to share. I wait for a lull or opportune moment…

And I share! Sometimes it’s blurted out, sometimes it’s mulled over. Still, I know what I say is worth sharing. I know without a doubt that I am clever and creative. I’m humble enough to know I might flub my words or it might not be everyone’s cup of tea. I try to speak up loud enough, I even repeat myself once or twice if needed.

Sometimes there’s that person or two or more who was nearby and heard me and are so glad I shared. We don’t even need to suddenly become bosom buddies for us to appreciate eachother. They might draw others’ attention back to me or have a nice, brief interaction with me.

But often times, either of two things happen: nobody else hears me or they hear me and just look at me. Some of them are people who I’ve been listening to the whole party. With the first, I can attempt to speak up louder, see who or what’s grabbing their attention, wait and try later, or save face by keeping it to myself.

Now when people hear me and just look at me? Maybe they smile a bit but whether it’s one of politeness or sarcasm or mild appreciation, who knows. There’s no booing or murmurs, no glares or quirked eyebrows, no criticism. However, there’s also no poorly muffled laughs, no looks of rapt attention, no shoulder bumps, nothing to encourage me to continue either. They’ve shown that they heard me speak, but I still don’t know anything more from them. Likes? Dislikes? I’m no mind reader. They seemed to welcome my attention to them earlier when they were the story teller.

So I go back to idle visiting and listening, which I still enjoy. I’ll think of things to say, sure, but I put myself out there less and less. Because why speak just to hear yourself talk? And now I’m taking everything in, but there’s less of an outlet. Then I have a harder time being cheerful for others, including the ones who’ve stuck with me. And I know I better leave before I fade into the background.

———

I enjoy sharing parts of myself for engagement and attention, and my writing is a small part of me. But I feel so embarrassed and naive, that I want to take back everything I’ve written. I must’ve misread the audience or expected too much. Maybe what I said was too niche and I could’ve kept that for myself to be amused by. I’ve deleted games and prompts I’ve reblogged because how pitiful it is to see that with no answered asks following it.

My experience, and other people’s too, has been more stagnate (people with 5x, 10x the notes I get are feeling the decrease in engagement) when I yearn for it to be dynamic. To have pleasant exchanges about any assortment of topics. To visit about characters and stories and ideas, or have a quick simple interactions to say yeah, we both see this or here’s something this reminds me or how did you come up with that? or imagine if X thing happened, what then?

I try to adjust my approach to fit the medium: use specific tags, use tag lists, post teasers, self-reblog, cross post to another site, share positivity and show appreciation. I remember authors so I can check their blogs for updates, instead of waiting for the updates to come to me. I’ve played the ask games and submitted requests. I try to share milestone and writing celebration posts when I see them. Let’s be vulnerable and show more of my personality, I think as I share another game or teaser or read fics of different characters, maybe I’ll seem more approachable.

Being a hypocrite is not where it’s at, I have reblogged tons of fics and shared my genuine reactions because I’ve enjoyed doing it. That’s why I made this blog in the first place: read and share and be a silly fan of whoever. Writing was an after thought. Both are fun, rewarding ways to connect with others, explore characters, and challenge and express myself.

But I sense that there’s an imbalance between the level of what I’m giving and what I’m receiving within this community, and my expectations for both. And I’ve been setting myself up for disappointment. Now I know there’s more than one way to engage with fics and community. It’s not as strictly transactional as I did xyz for you this many times, now you better match that. That’s unfair and unrealistic. It’s reciprocation that’s on my mind.

I’m pouring from a cup that occasionally gets filled, and often partially at that. It’s gotten harder to enjoy myself and to give generous pours to others. I feel like holding my cup upright and trying to take back what’s already been poured.

It’s apparent to me now more than ever that people just don’t notice the things that I notice. They don’t operate or remember or interact how I do. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but adjusting to that is kicking my butt. I am so weary of swinging and missing, of holding out hope.

I’m unsure what this (any of what I just said) means for my fic experience or future of it, but it was churning in my mind for a long, long while. This is one way for me to work through what I’ve been feeling lately. Many people are feeling disheartened and burnt out. I’m sad that I feel the need to rein in my enthusiasm when I’ve never even had that thought in all my years on this site.

….

#now watch there’s gonna be some obvious ass typo in here 🤣 #i withdrew from here for 2-3mos at the start of 2022. I got 0 msgs & <15 notes on older fics or queued. #so when i felt better to come back I had little indication that people thought of me just because or noticed my absence. #but then i show up in an inbox and it’s all ‘omg hi *cute nickname* you’re back!! 💕🥰’ #am i missing smth obvious here? a social convention or fandom interaction 101 bullet point? #i’m not even the third wheel here i’m the donut in the trunk #what aren’t I doing enough of. how have I misstepped. #truly i am so confused #my assorted gabs and chats #feels a little off tone for this post but it’s the tag i got

[dlamp-dictator]

I know I said I’d talk more about Elsword, but has been in my drafts for a week now. Y’know, the only anime I’m watching this season aside from some Hi-Dive stuff is Kaguya-Sama season 3, Spy X Family, and In the Heart of Kunoichi Tsubaki. I tried watching a few other things, but aside from that Hi-Dive stuff two of those shows almost immediately fell flat for me. And I needed to vent about them for a bit. I won’t tag these aside from my usual personal tags since I don’t want to be that asshole tags my negativity without damn good reason and ruin every fan’s good time, but... I can’t watch Shield Hero anymore.

For a quick synopsis, The Rising of the Shield Hero follows Iwatani Naofumi, an otaku from our modern time summoned to a fantasy world that follows an RPG-like structure... like 85% of all other Isekai anime. The big twist in this one being that Naofumi is summoned as the Shield Hero, a rather hated and discriminated figure according to the past and lore of the kingdom he’s summoned into, and is harshly treated within the first season to an almost comical point by both the kingdom’s citizens and his fellow heroes. This treatment turns Naofumi dark and pragmatic, and as he goes about saving the world in his own pragmatic and blunt way he gains several allies, abilities, and resources to use.

And boy, did I get turned off after episode one of season 2.

For the short version of this whole venting essay: the slave girl party was barely tolerable in the first season and I only dealt with it because the plot seemed to be moving past that. As of episode one of season 2 not only is it continuing that trend, but the length it’s going to justify it is flat out stupid.

But, let me explain this in greater detail

So, Let’s Talk About Slavery

I’ll spare you all a long discussion on why violating human rights and a living, sentient being’s autonomy is, in fact, a bad thing and talking about slavery in the sense of a narrative, setting, and isekai.

Slavery, from the perspective of most isekai protagonists, is the aforementioned violation of human rights and autonomy I mentioned, but most tackle in the same way.

As being only one singular person in a society of thousands or even millions with differing views of slavery due to the culture and time period of the summoned setting, the protagonist either knows or quickly learns that they, as a single person with an extremely different mindset and background to the setting they’re in, likely can’t just overturn the slave trade without becoming a wanted criminal. They usually lament the slave trade and its terribleness, but know it’s safer to stay out of those affairs lest they run into further problems. Depending on the righteousness of the character or how much of a power fantasy the series is, the main character might stop a nearby slave trade with force or guile, and the more pragmatic of them might try to swindle the slave trader in a way that grants the slaves freedom without profiting the slave market, but the most common route I’ve seen is that they buy or rescue a specific slave girl that they specifically pitied.

This is often done as a way to not only show that the main character is sympathetic toward a specific slave, but due to that slave girl being moved out of the dangerous and harmful environment of the slave trade and into the care of the kinder and more generous protagonist they’ll often become a loyal follower that will love and cherish them no matter what as thanks for being freed from what would be a crueler fate.

I don’t think I need to say how this is disgusting on the part of the narrative, but I’ll give you all the brass tacks of it. In a nutshell, this is an insidiously cheap way of trying to frame the protagonist as a good person while also letting them have a slave at the same time. It’s more manipulative than kind on the protagonist’s end for a number of reasons and I’ll just give you all the small list version.

Purchasing slaves, even if one plans to immediately free them, allows the slave trade to profit and continue.

A protagonist keeping a slave under any circumstance, makes them a slave owner by default and it takes some extremely good writing or an extremely pragmatic setting to let that go unaddressed.

The protagonist rarely ever makes an effort to free the slaves in their circle or encourage them to move past them in order to keep them around (I’ve only seen it about twice).

The slave often gains either romantic feelings for the protagonist which is, frankly, not a good thing even with the proper context.

Mind you, all of these points have their own asterisks to them. Purchasing a slave can be done out of pragmatism of having a loyal helper that is familiar with the world to an extend. Being a slave owner within a setting that already accepts slavery isn’t as damning as it would be in our own, even if I, the reader, will judge the protagonist more harshly. The protagonist might be ignorant in their understanding that slave's constant affection is likely a pragmatic coping tactic to avoid beatings or abuse and as we often only have the protagonist’s perspective we never see the internal machinations of the slave in question. I’m not saying it’s impossible to make this work, but there usually needs to be a lot of internal justification and an honest exploration of the topic if that topic is going to be there.

And to be fair, there are a handful anime, light novels, and isekai that address this. Masters of Ragnarok explain that the main character can’t outlaw slavery yet due to his already meritocratic policies and harsher laws forbidding looting and pillaging during war time creating a lot of political unease among the slave-owning elites. Realist Hero has the main character slowly implementing laws and policies to encourage education among the lowest ranked citizens and slaves of his kingdom as a way to pave the way for former slaves to become citizens within the next few decades. Demon Princess Magical Chaos, for all it’s flaws and blunders, has its main character sharply criticize those that engage in the slave trade and spent the first portion of it’s third book outright annihilating a slave market. It can be done, it’s just that some care and acknowledgement is needed to make sure the fact that slavery is, in fact, a bad thing needs to be discussed as well.

But... let’s bring this back to focus.

What Does This Have to Do With Shield Hero?

For those unfamiliar with the events in the first season of Shield Hero, Naofumi spends the first portion of the show buying a slave girl known as Raphtalia to become his sword since the mechanics of the world he’s summoned to doesn’t give him much in the way of using offense. Through various events the two have less of a master-slave relationship and more of a father-daughter one instead, Raphtalia slowly becoming a skilled swordswoman and right-hand woman to Naofumi as she’s the one to keep his pragmatism in check and makes sure he doesn’t push himself too hard through his darker, riskier magic as the series goes on. The party increases with Filo, large bird-like creature that can change into a human form. Through various events she also gains more of a father-daughter relationship to Naofumi.

The latest girl, Rishia, is an archer girl with strong abilities in ki according to the martial artist in Naotfumi’s circle. To keep her story simple, she was left behind by one of the Cardinal Heroes for being too weak and burdening her old party. She finds herself joining Naofumi in order to gain the strength she needs to rejoin her old party and be accepted by them.

And... Raphtalia asks her to become a slave as a way to connect herself to Naofumi.

...

...

...

Look, I’m not going to go on a tirade about this, I’m sure other people already have. My main issue isn’t that Raphtalia has confused slavery to be a form of bond due to her being lucky enough to have a master that actually cares for her (keep in mind she’s, like, 12 and doesn’t know how her own mind works). It’s mostly toward Naofumi, who despite his pragmatism usually shows some pretty clear lines in understanding that all that aforementioned human rights violating and autonomy snatching is wrong. He bought Raphtalia out of desperation and pragmatism due to him being so few allies and so many enemies he had no choice but to buy an ally. And Filo, for as disturbing as her being a slave is, was an honest-to-god pet bird before Naofumi and Raphtalia realized she could obtain a human form. Everyone else in Naofumi’s circle is an independent, free person serving him out of their own free will after seeing his good deeds, or are professionals that were assigned (and likely paid) to help Naofumi under orders of the royal family.

Rishia... has no reason to willing lose her autonomy, especially at the behest of Raphtalia. And Naofumi only gives a nervous shrug and basically says “if you really want to...”

Naofumi. My guy. My dude. Why?

Didn’t you just call out the Bow and Spear Hero last season for ignorantly not taking the consequences of their actions seriously enough? I mean... we, the audience, know you aren’t going to do anything weird with Rishia, especially since pragmatic Naofumi mostly sees her as a hassle with small bits of potential, but... ugh, this really bugged me to the point of starting of losing interest in this series. I just can’t, man. I watched about 4 episodes of this, but it just isn’t working for me. My mind still looks back at that first episode with apprehension and annoyance.

The show has an honestly good hook and I like a lot of its themes, but... man, that’s a real dark stain on an otherwise decent series.

Conclusion

Honestly, that’s really all I wanted to get off my chest. I think I’ll binge this season of Shield Hero at some point, and I know the show has started its simuldub recently, so maybe I’ll keep up with the show that way once the dub pushes past episode 4. That one stain of a moment aside, I find this Tortoise Arc really interesting, as it’s showing off more lore about the world and at the point I stopped watching the other set of heroes are about to get involved, which means we might see Glass again, and she’s best girl of the series so far.

I don’t think this show is completely unwatchable, but I’ll definitely have my eyes and ears open a little more when I pick this series back up next month or so. Until then I’ll just stick with In the Heart of Kunoichi Tsubaki and Kaguya-Sama.

Anyway, I’ll see you folks later.

#your dictator is speaking

[winter-soldier-vibes]

We Need You

Bucky x reader

Word count: 1901

Summary: Bucky comforts a reader with imposter syndrome (inability to believe that one’s success is deserved)

Warnings: imposter syndrome, low self worth/self esteem, feeling worthless, slight angst, mostly comfort

A/N: I have issues that present similarly to imposter syndrome, but I don’t experience it fully or severely. You belong and wherever you are, you fucking earned that. You worked hard to get where you are. I hope this fic can bring you some comfort, I apologize if I did not serve the topic justice. Sorry it took so long! As always, if anyone needs anything from me or just wants to talk and vent, I am ALWAYS here! <3

Tags: @buckys2thicc @buckfics @thatfangirl42 @mardema @barnesplums @bucks-bunny @stucky-on-spiderman @peggycarter-steverogers @freigeistundanderes

Add yourself to my taglist! Masterlist

------

You were calm, cool and collected. Smart, dedicated, and hard-working. You were an Avenger, one of the more valuable assets to the team with your training in hand to hand combat and knowledge of weaponry. 

At least, that’s how everyone saw you. Everyone except you. 

Every “job well done” translated to “I could’ve done better” for you. Compliments in a way felt like pity to you. Like it was all a lie or something. You could’ve been better, you didn’t think you were anything special. 

Anytime someone gave you praise you would wave it off with a small smile. Everyone saw it as you being modest, but internally you just couldn’t accept it. You couldn’t accept praise knowing you could’ve done better.

Settle for nothing less than perfection. But nobody’s perfect.

You were endlessly grateful for your team, your family, but you couldn’t help but feel like you didn’t deserve it. You had so much good in your life, but you felt like you had to keep proving yourself. 

You had everything you could ever want, but you still felt like you had to earn it. 

You thought you had done a good job at keeping it hidden. Imposter syndrome you had heard someone call it at one point. You had looked into it, realizing more and more of it resonated with you. You didn’t feel that you deserved your spot on the team, even though most of the team could agree that you were one of their best fighters. 

You were also one of the kindest people on the team, and everyone enjoyed being in your company. Again, you wrote it off as them feeling obligated to talk to you rather than them choosing to talk to you. 

Everything you thought about yourself, the degrading names you called yourself, and the way you waved off all of your achievements didn’t match up at all with the way anyone thought about you. 

It went unnoticed to most. You would put up a front, small smiles and thank you’s occasionally. There would be small side comments that you would make occasionally, but it was nothing that would cause red flags to arise. 

It’s nothing, really.

I didn’t do anything you wouldn’t have done.

It’s no big deal.

No worries

That’s why I’m here I guess

Compliments were deflected. Whenever you received criticism you would internalize it even though you knew it was nothing against you. Friendly advice to improve job performance. But for you, it reinforces the thought that your performance needed to be improved.

No matter what you did, you would never be good enough. You used to chase achievements, telling yourself that if you did well enough, if you did good things, that you would feel a sense of self worth. That maybe if you achieved things you would be filled with a sense of pride.

Instead you were left feeling as though you didn’t deserve any of the recognition you received. In a way, it made you feel even more insecure.

You thought that if you accepted the praise you would seem self indulgent or boastful that if you said what your achievements were you would seem prideful. So you accepted them with a small smile and thank you. At least until people moved onto the next topic and you drop the smile when it seemed safe. When no one was watching. 

When you thought no one was watching. 

Which is how Bucky had come to notice the discomfort you had.

When he had first joined the team, he was very quiet. He did a lot of listening and observing, not wanting to speak much himself. That was understandable to anyone. So when you had been introduced to him and your skillset had been mentioned and you waved it off saying no big deal, he had noticed how you shifted as if you were uncomfortable and your smile dropped as soon as the attention was on someone else. 

He didn’t think much of it. If anything it had to do with being uncomfortable around him. 

But as time passed he started relaxing around everyone too, especially you. He was still accepting what he had done and who he was now. He was still reserved but he wasn’t silent. The two of you had become good friends, being two of the quieter personalities on the team. 

Now you had someone to keep you company when you stayed at the outskirts of Tony’s parties.  

But as more time went on, he noticed small things that you did. Behaviors you had, things you said. Clutch phrases. The way you would seem embarrassed when people complimented you. The way you would say that there were no worries even if you were the only reason that a mission was successful. 

Sometimes when you thought you were alone or no one would hear, he would catch you mumbling things to yourself. Things like yeah right to compliments before giving a genuine response. The slight shakes of the head in protest. The nervous habits you had when you got a compliment. The little things that others were too distracted to notice, too small to 

Bucky was an observant man. 

Which is how one night, you hadn’t realized him come into your room to talk to you about something that Bucky completely forgot about once he saw you. You were sitting down at your desk, head in your hands and rubbing your eyes. 

Jesus why am I so stupid

What the fuck is wrong with me

They don’t mean what they say

How could they like you?

I’m worthless

Just like everyone else

I don’t belong here

You were so trapped by the marathon of degrading thoughts that you hadn’t heard Bucky come in. He stood beside you, concern etched on his face. 

“Y/n?” you jumped slightly and took your hands away from your face, blinking in surprise. You had been crying. Why was he here?

“Y/n what’s wrong?” he asked, coming over to you. 

You shook your head and shrugged, wiping a few loose tears from your face. “‘M fine Buck,” you whispered, struggling to keep your emotions out of your voice.

“Y/n,” Bucky said, crouching down in front of you. “You wouldn’t be crying if something wasn’t wrong. It’s okay to be upset, there’s nothing wrong with that. Just tell me why you’re upset.”

You shook your head again. “Really Buck, I’m fine.”

“Y/n, I may not be able to read minds like Wanda, but I know something’s bothering you.it’s okay.”

You sighed, taking a breath before looking at him. “Do you guys really mean it?” you suddenly asked meekly.

Bucky drew his eyebrows together in confusion. “Mean...what?” 

“After missions, when you say I did the right thing, that I did a good job, that you guys need me - do you mean it?”

Bucky looked more puzzled now. “Yeah, of course we do. Why else would we say things like that?”

“If you thought you were supposed to.” you said suddenly. “Or if, you know, you wanted to be polite, or you thought I wanted to hear it, or you didn’t really mean it I don’t really know I -”

“Y/n, hold on, slow it down...What?” Bucky said. “Why on Earth would you think that?”

You crossed your arms and shrugged. “I dunno, I just don’t really feel like I’m all that valuable to you guys here. I don’t do anything you guys couldn’t do without me. I make so many mistakes all the time and no matter how hard I try I just don’t feel like I belong here.”

Bucky took a minute to look at you. He had known you doubted yourself but this was beyond what he had thought. To think that you, y/n, weren’t valuable to this team was a crazy idea to him

To you it was the truth.

“Y/n, no, we need you. Why on Earth would you think you don’t belong?”

“Because I haven’t earned it. I’m on the team, I fight with you guys, but I still don’t feel like I should be. The mistakes I make all the time, the wrong calls, the selfish calls, bad judgements...I could go on. I just...no matter how much good I do it doesn’t make the mistakes go away.”

“Y/n, you are one of the best people we have, we -”

“No I’m not,” you said firmly, surprising Bucky. You shook your head. “You guys don’t need me. I don’t deserve to be on this team.”

“And I do?” Bucky asked.

You looked back at him. “What do you mean? Of course you do. Your the best fighter we have, Steve's best friend, we need you.”

“But I’ve made so many mistakes. You know all of the horrible things that I’ve done y/n. I was made into a weapon.” he said.”

“Bucky you know that wasn’t your fault. You didn’t choose that and you would've done anything to stop it. That’s different. You’re a great fighter and a good person, Bucky.”

“So are you.” he stated simply. “Do you believe that?”

You took a deep breath.  “I believe you believe that. But that doesn’t mean it’s true.”

Bucky put his hands on your shoulders. “You are a fighter. A hero. You’ve saved so many people doing things that some of us couldn’t or wouldn’t do. People out there remember how you saved them. How you protected them and gave yourself to them. That was you, no one else. You are a part of this team, you help make it what it is. We would be lost without you. You put your blood, sweat, and tears into this team. You give your heart and soul to this team. You’ve earned every goddamn bit of praise you get and more. You fought your place onto this team and you deserve to be here just as much as everyone else here. So when your head tells you that you don’t belong or that we don’t need you, tell it to fuck off. Because you’re one of the best people we have.”

By now you had tears in your eyes again, but not ones of shame. Ones of appreciation and relief. You had wanted to hear those words directly for so long and to be affirmed in that way was something you needed. “Thank you Bucky,” you said softly, giving him one of your first genuine smiles at a compliment.

He squeezed your shoulder reassuringly. “Anytime. Anytime you want a reminder, you let me know. I’ll tell you as many times as you need to hear it before you can start to believe it for yourself.”

#bucky #Bucky Barnes #james buchanan barnes #buckybarnes #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes x reader #bucky imagine #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barns fanfiction #bucky barns x reader #bucky barns imagine #bucky barns x you #tw imposter syndrome #comfort #bucky barnes comfort #bucky gives a pep talk #bucky is a hype man #MCU #MCU fanfiction #mcu imagine #mcu fic #marvel fanfic #marvel fanfiction #marvel #fanfiction #fanfic

[itsclydebitches]

Thoughts on RWBY and Community Driven Content

Hi, everyone! I wanted to toss in my two cents on the recent conversation sparked by Jakeysfics’ post (easily found in the RWDE tag. Apologies for not linking, but I believe Tumblr is still hiding posts with links?) and I decided to make a post of my own just to avoid adding to a bloated reblog chain. That, and I wanted to focus on an aspect other than the points others have already articulated. (Namely, the acknowledgement that conversation will inevitably grow stale after such a long hiatus and the problem with using offensive language—“circlejerking,” “proper analysis,” etc.—to make an otherwise valid point in a community who is small in part because of harassment.)

Taking a totally wild guess here, but I’m probably one of the “same two guys” people are sick of seeing in the RWDE tag, simply because I do tend to post daily, the majority of my posts are answering asks, and those asks tend to be quite repetitive in regards to their content. I want to be upfront in saying that I’ve been anxious about these things long before they were publicly called out. There was a period of time when I rarely used “RWDE” because I didn’t want to flood the tag with my posts, which led directly to non-RWDE fans leaving comments and asks going, “You need to put ‘RWDE’ on this. We don’t want to see it.” There are times when I tackle asks from the most recently submitted downwards, but there are other times when I’ll deliberately skip asks I want to answer because, “I already talked about this recently. People don’t want to hear about it again.” I’m also very aware of when I still get repetitive in my discussions, belaboring the same main points, using the same examples, offering the same advice to fix things in the future. More than once I’ve deleted asks I’ve spent the afternoon on, or left things to stagnate in the drafts folder, or just worry about reception after I’ve posted because damn, Clyde, don’t you have anything new to say?

I don’t mean for this post to come across as a pity party, or me looking for reassurance. Far from it. Rather, that anxiety and the recent, overt acknowledgement that at least one person is responding negatively in the way I’ve feared they would has made me question why I continue to do this kind of work anyway. Especially when, as established, the harassment can, at times, feel like it outweighs everything else (even though I also think that’s the anxiety talking, often blowing up a few, hostile voices to make them feel larger than they actually are). So if I’m aware of the problems with repetitious content, alongside that other, very large negative, why not just… stop? Or at least slow down and only post the “proper analysis” that might receive less heat from RWDE and non-RWDE alike?

Basically, this discussion made me think about why I write metas—specifically short, prompted metas like answering asks—and the answer I kept coming back to was, “Community.”

Sure, there are lots of other reasons to write out our thoughts (venting, understanding, scratching that itch), but none of those reasons are inherently responsive. If I wanted to write RWBY things solely to get them out of my head, I could scribble them in a personal journal and tuck it away. But I don’t. I post on a public, microblogging website because I hope that other people will interact with my posts and, as a result, help me form social ties that emotionally enrich my life. And it worked! Many of my closest friends on Tumblr are people I met through the RWBY fandom and my online social circle is filled with even more acquaintances whose [Pyrrha voice] “Hello!” in the form of likes, reblogs, comments, or asks absolutely lights up my day. I post because I want to connect.

Arguably, I want to connect more than I want to produce “good” content. I mean, obviously I want to do that too—they theoretically go hand-in-hand, with good work generating a larger audience to interact with—but if I’m ultimately prioritizing connection, asks are the ultimate example of what Tumblr has to offer in that regard. Someone took time out of their day to write me, wanting to spark a conversation. That’s amazing. What do I care if I’ve had this conversation before? Or if others don’t necessarily find watching our conversation to be the most interesting thing out of their day? My goal is to connect with them (however briefly and however “stupidly,” given that we’re talking about a webseries), not necessarily to craft a product that others find sufficiently entertaining. That would be like if someone came up to me irl and went, “Hey, Clyde! I just watched Buffy. Did you like the finale?” and my response was, “Sorry, but I already discussed that with another friend two days ago. And someone else last week. Plus, don’t you realize how old that show is? We’ve moved on! However, I recorded our conversation and you’re welcome to listen to it if you want. But if you want to discuss something with me, it’ll have to be new enough to fulfill the entertainment needs of anyone listening in.” That’s... weird, right? I can’t speak for anyone else, but my irl friendships are built on rehashing the same conversations and debates (especially now that the pandemic has severely limited our experiences. There’s little new in our lives to share). You’ve already heard about the time I got lost in Japan? You’ve already heard my thoughts about how great The Secret of Monkey Island is? You’ve already heard my rants about Moffat’s Doctor Who?

And I’m going to hear all the things I already know about you, presented in a slightly different way, with perhaps a slightly new perspective, with any repetition forgiven because it’s more about spending time with you than being entertained by the content itself. Why would online friendships function any differently?

Actually, I think I have an answer to that. We expect them to function differently because the evolution of the rest of the Internet has warped our idea of what Tumblr is all about. Meaning, I gain nothing from prioritizing “good” content over just interacting with people because I enjoy interacting with them. Producing new content to attract more followers will not land me advertising deals like it might on Instagram. Producing new content will not make me more appealing to a YouTube algorithm, leading to people sponsoring my work. This is not a Twitch stream where viewers are donating provided my vid is interesting enough to entertain them. I don’t even have a $1 Patreon connected to my metas. Basically, online content—even explicitly, copyrighted fandom content—has become so monetized that people approach any work with the mindset of, “What is this doing to entertain me? With the expectation that, if it’s good enough, I’ll give that creator money, or support that will somehow lead to money,” rather than, “There’s a content creator making cool stuff as a hobby. If I like them I’ll stick around, if not I’ll leave.” There’s no benefit to me agonizing over producing content that’s new and super polished (except for some kind of personal pride) because I don’t treat my RWBY-ing as a side job. Yet many people now treat fandom as a professional production that has failed if it’s not crafted with that audience enrichment in mind. I’ve seen this primarily in regards to fanfiction—Why isn’t your work at the standard of the increasing number of profics? Why aren’t you writing for the largest audience possible? How dare you create something that’s niche and primarily for you/your friend group?—but I’m seeing it crop up with metas too. Especially given RWBY critics’ prominent place on YouTube, there’s this pervasive sense that a fan has failed if they’re prioritizing content that they like, rather than catering to Patreons, or the top rated comment on the last vid.

And to be clear, I get it. 100%. There have been plenty of times when I’ve popped into the RWDE tag, hoping for something interesting to pass the time, and am then disappointed that people are still talking about the Thing I’m Not Interested In. Or there are only asks that rehash my exact thoughts on a matter. Or hell, there’s no new posts at all because, as said, this community has become a “circlejerk” largely because other, diverse voices have been scared away. RWDE has become a group made up of people who are a) into RWBY, b) are critical to one extent or another of RWBY, c) are stubborn enough to keep posting despite the harassment, d) choose to post on Tumblr (already a comparatively smaller site), and e) have the time and inclination to post with some frequency. With that number of caveats, is it any wonder that fans are saddled with the same, repetitive content? But even if RWDE were a massive, prolific group with a variety of voices… I’d still be spending a good chunk of my RWBY time answering asks because that’s one of the best and easiest ways to connect with others. I don’t post here because doing so will get me a paycheck, or earn me some sort of Internet clout (can you imagine trying to brag that you’re “famous” on Tumblr? LOL). I do it because I love fan communities, I love RWBY, and I love when those two things slam together for a good time in this hellish, pandemic-ridden world. Creating posts that others would consider appropriately unique works of written art comes secondary because I have no incentive to prioritize that over my own enjoyment. That’s why things like commissions exist. The artist draws what they want to draw up until someone says, “I’ll pay you to draw this specific thing that I’m looking for.” Or the positive response from the community is worth drawing something you’re meh about: “I don’t care for this ship, but these hundreds of people are so happy to see it so sure, it’s a gift!” The Tumblr RWDE community is not paid and a large chunk of the fandom is hostile to any work we produce, so there’s no reason to post anything other than precisely what we want. If others are (understandably) unhappy with the echo chamber this produces, they need to make the change. Start producing the content you want to see and help to make the community more welcoming so that others, in turn, feel like posting “proper analysis” (which, notably, takes far longer and is far more work) will get them something other than an anonymous message saying to kill themselves.

Basically, I answer asks about the same things because clearly, people care enough about those things to keep sending in asks. Sometimes repetition occurs because someone just got into the fandom, or doesn’t realize I have discussed this before… but more often than not, it’s just because people want to connect over shared ideas, even if we’ve already connected over them in the past. You like talking about this thing, I like talking about this thing, who cares if we’ve talked about it together before? Let’s do it again and have some fun.

#suicide tw #rwde #rwby #fandom #writing #mymetas

[writingblock101]

Waffles or Pancakes? (Tim Drake x Reader)

Miss me? More explanation at the bottom. Enjoy this vent fic! 

Warnings: None

Word Count: 2,600

Tags: @idkmanicantenglish @mayahoelland2013

You pick up a stone, fiddling with it in your hand. You don’t have daddy issues. The complicated relationship with your father doesn’t run that deep, and it definitely isn’t some kink… but there are a lot of unresolved problems threatening to boil over the surface. 

Complicated relationship...More like lack thereof. You suppose that’s what happens when you have divorced parents, and you only see your dad every other weekend. Then other shit happens, he marries the wrong woman, you get older and more involved in your own life, and there’s not much effort on either side. You suppose that’s the origin of most of these problems, but you’re not the adult in this situation, dammit! 

You throw the rock in frustration, watching it disappear off the side of the building, then a puddle of dread pools in your stomach. You’re on top of a building, and pedestrians are walking below, minding their own business. Sure, it may be close to 3 a.m. in Gotham, but still! Your actions have consequences. 

You rush to the side of the building to make sure you didn’t bodily injure some random person, only to look down and see empty streets. Your pebble most likely joined another heap of loose asphalt. Plopping down heavily onto the ledge of the apartment building, you stare into the streets below and idly wonder if Batman and Robin are patrolling. When do they ever sleep? Do they sleep? 

You should be asleep, and you know it. You said good night to the friend you were messaging over an hour ago, but instead of rolling over and passing out, your mind wandered to your family, specifically your father. Probably because you’re going to be seeing him in a few days for the holidays. It’s not exactly dread. Your father is a very loving man who loves you very much, but it never felt like he put effort into your relationship. Of course, it wasn’t until you were older that you realized how little effort he genuinely put in. As a child, you strived for his love, his approval, his interest. That’s what you really wanted. You knew he loved you and was so proud of you, but you also knew he was never truly interested in you or your life. And that stung. 

So now, instead of ever bringing up your dad during therapy, you’re sitting on a roof, throwing rocks into the abyss, and getting teary-eyed over arguments that will never happen. 

“Care for some company?” A voice startles you. 

You turn to see Red Robin of all people, standing a few feet away and looking as non-threatening as possible. You shrug and gesture to the ledge. 

“Plenty of ledge here for the both of us. Besides, I’m sure you could teach me a few things about perching on tall buildings.” 

Red Robin chuckles and moves to the edge of the building. He tosses his legs over the side, sitting a foot away from you, and stares out on the city. You wonder what he sees when he looks on the city. He, Batman, Robin, and Red Hood protect Gotham for whatever reason. You’re not sure this cesspool deserves it, but apparently, they see something in it. 

“I wasn’t going to jump,” You tell him. 

“I didn’t think you were,” He responds simply. 

“I’m not suicidal,” You plow ahead. “I don’t want to die, but I kept spiraling the longer I laid in bed.” 

Red Robin nods along, like he gets it, like he understands. And maybe he does. You suppose despite all the rumors about the Bats, they probably are normal humans under those cowls and masks. Humans with a deathwish, but at this point, who isn’t? 

“Do you want to talk about it?” He offers quietly. 

“With you?” You raise an eyebrow. 

Red Robin pretends to look around the empty rooftop. 

“Well, unless you’re seeing someone that I’m not, then yeah, with me.” 

He chuckles at his own joke, and silence falls between you two again. 

“I know it’s weird,” Red Robin admits. “To talk about something that’s probably really personal with a total stranger, but I’d figure I’d offer. Talking… It helps. So if you don’t talk to me, you should think about talking to someone.” 

You pause, mulling over his words. You don’t know Red Robin. You’re pretty sure Red Robin doesn’t know you. But why would he want to listen to some pity party at 3 am on some random apartment rooftop? Surely, he has better things to do. 

But he sat down. He offered. He’s making an effort. 

That’s more than some people can say. 

You sigh heavily, your shoulders slumping. 

“It’s my dad,” You finally admit. “We’ve always had a… complicated relationship. It’s not that he doesn’t love me-- he very clearly does. He’s always been a very affectionate man, but… it feels like he was never really interested in my life. Not in a malicious way, but in an oblivious way. And when it was happening before my eyes, I was a kid, so I didn’t see it, but now being older… It’s more obvious. It’s so clear that he doesn’t know me… And it stings.” 

Red Robin listens patiently, nodding along with your words. He says nothing, letting you speak. 

“And in my head, I keep bringing up things that happened years ago that still bother me so much, but it was so many years ago. He probably doesn’t remember because he doesn’t think they’re significant moments, you know? It’s things he said in passing that he doesn’t think of as hurtful that left… Much deeper marks than I’m willing to admit.”

You sigh, scrubbing your face in frustration at the burning in your eyes. You don’t want to cry. You don’t like crying. You don’t care if you need to cry-- you cried earlier, and now, you’re not going to cry in front of Red Robin about your damn daddy issues (okay, maybe they are daddy issues, but you’re sure as hell not going to be calling anyone “daddy” in the bedroom). 

“I just… I’m tired. I’m tired of trying to put effort into a relationship that he doesn’t seem to want to put effort into. And the thing is, I doubt he even realizes that he’s doing it! If I talked to him, I’m sure we could figure something out, but… I’m not sure I want to… I love my dad very much, and I know he loves me… But I don’t think I like him.” 

Right as the words pass your lips, you feel instant regret seize your chest. 

“Oh, God, does that make me a bad person?” You bury your face in your hands, fighting back the watering in your eyes. “He’s such a loving man. He’s a damn bleeding heart, and I know if he heard me say that, it would break his heart!” 

The thought alone sends tears spilling over onto your cheeks. You love your dad, you don’t want to see him heartbroken, but it’s getting harder to ignore your own bruises. 

Red Robin scoots closer to you, rubbing your back soothingly. 

“No, it doesn’t make you a bad person,” He tells you softly. “It sounds like you’re really hurt. While we can love our family, it’s hard to like someone who’s brought you so much pain.” 

“But he… He’s so sweet,” You sob, taking a stuttering breath. “He’s one of the most loving people I’ve ever met.” 

“But that doesn’t mean he can’t hurt you,” Red Robin tells you gently. 

The tears well up in your eyes again, and you give up trying to make any sense of your thoughts. Instead, you let the tears fall. Red Robin pulls in arm around your shoulders, rubbing your arm as you lean against him and silently cry. 

You two sit there in silence for what must be an hour before you finally sit up and rub your face. 

“Well, that’s certainly not how I expected this to go,” You admit sheepishly, wiping your face. “Sorry for making you listen to my dumb sob story.” 

“I’ve been there,” Red Robin offers a tissue that he produced from somewhere on his suit. “It’s not dumb. Having someone who will listen makes all the difference.” 

“Thanks,” You say softly, offering a watery smile as you blow your nose and finish wiping your face off. 

“Are you hungry?” He offers. 

“Hungry?” 

Red Robin shrugs. 

“Crying takes it out of you. And it sounds like you’ve had a long night. How about some 4 am breakfast?” 

“But I don’t have my wallet,” You dumbly state as if not having a wallet is the only issue with his proposal. 

Red Robin waves you off. 

“It’s my treat.” 

You look down at your clothes: sneakers, mismatching socks, stained sweatpants, an old sleep shirt, and the first jacket you could find in your room, which was a jean jacket. 

“You look fine,” He assures you. “Besides, it’s 4 am. If anything, you fit the vibe more than I do.” 

You giggle at that, grimacing at how tight your face feels from the crying and the snot dripping from your nose. Wiping your nose with your sleeve, you glance around the rooftop. 

“How are we going to get there? I don’t have a car.” 

Red Robin pulls what looks to be a grappling hook from his side. 

“I have an idea. But I have one important question before we proceed.” 

You look at him warily. 

“Do you trust me?” He asks. 

And considering you just cried on his shoulder for the past hour and info dumped a small piece of your tragic backstory, you suppose you kind of do.

“Yeah,” You tell him. 

“Great,” He smiles. “That wasn’t the important question, but that was needed information. Get on my back.” 

You blink at him. 

“Um. What?” 

“Get on my back,” Red Robin repeats like it’s the most simple thing in the world. “I’m going to swing us to a breakfast place,” He waves his grappling hook.

“Um.” 

“You said you trust me,” Red Robin reminds you. 

And you suppose you did say that, didn’t you? He does this just about every night, he can keep you safe… Hopefully. 

Red Robin bends down so you can hop onto his back. Once he’s sure you’re securely situated with your arms around his neck and your legs around his waist, Red Robin climbs up on the ledge of the apartment. Your grip tightens as he stands dangerously close to the edge. 

“Wait,” You say before he jumps. 

Red Robin turns his head in acknowledgment. 

“What was the important question?” 

He grins at you. 

“Waffles or pancakes?” 

“What?” 

“Waffles or pancakes?” Red Robin repeats like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. 

“That was your important question?” You shake your head in disbelief. 

“It is an important question,” He insists. 

You pause for a moment, pondering your answer. 

“Pancakes,” You say decisively. 

“Good answer,” Red Robin grins, then steps off the building. 

For a moment, your breath is stuck in your throat as everything tenses, bracing for impact. Then, there’s a tugging—something dragging you away from the ground in a long arch. You tear your eyes away from the ground to see Red Robin almost effortlessly swinging with his grappling hook. Every shot is perfectly timed and calculated. It looks like second nature at this point, and it makes you wonder how long Red Robin has been doing this. Who is Red Robin under the cowl?

Eventually, you land in front of a mom and pop dinner which advertises 24/7 breakfast. 

“It doesn’t look like much, but this place has the best pancakes,” Red Robin promises as you slide off his back. 

You shrug, looking up at the old sign and well-loved booths inside. 

“Like you said, it fits the vibe.” 

Red Robin grins and opens the door for you. He directs you to a booth in the back. An older waitress comes by your table holding two mugs and a pot of coffee.

“Hey, Red,” She greets, looking tired but friendly. “Who’s your friend?” 

Red Robin glances over at you with a small smile. 

“A fellow pancake lover.” 

The waitress chuckles as she pours him a cup of coffee. 

“Coffee?” She offers you. 

“Uh, sure,” You’re doubtful that you’ll drink it since pulling an all-nighter sounds less than ideal but holding something warm sounds nice. 

“So, a stack of pancakes for both of you then?” The waitress asks, not bothering to write down the simple order. 

“That sounds great, Brooke,” Red Robin smiles. 

“Sure thing,” Brooke heads back to the kitchen to place the order, leaving you at the table with Red Robin. 

You blow on your hot coffee and wrap your fingers around the mug, enjoying the heat. 

“Alright, another important question for you,” Red Robin begins as he adds sugar and cream to his coffee. 

You smile, ready for this all-important question with rapt attention. 

“Acceptable toppings on pancakes?” 

Midway through your heated debate about which fruits are acceptable to top pancakes with (“Oh, so pineapple can go on pizza, but it can’t go on pancakes?!”), Brooke drops off two stacks of fluffy, golden brown pancakes. While Red Robin is wrong about pancake toppings, he wasn’t lying about these pancakes being delicious.

“Okay,” You say through a mouthful of heavenly pancake. “These pancakes are delicious, but I cannot fathom the thought of you ruining them with Miracle Whip.” 

“It sounds weird, I know,” Red Robin admits, opting to dunk his pancakes in syrup only, thank God. “But trust me.” 

“Miracle Whip,” You repeat. “Like the substitute for mayonnaise.” 

“It’s sweeter than mayo!” Red Robin argues. “It’s like a sweet cream on pancakes.” 

“I think you’ve had one too many concussions.” 

“Oh, really?” You’re sure that Red Robin is raising his eyebrows at you under his cowl, judging by the look on his face. “So, what’s your excuse for orange juice and chocolate chip cookies?” 

“Okay listen,” You point your fork at him. “I never said it was my idea. A friend made me try it, and it wasn’t the worst thing in the world!” 

“How can you question my judgment about Miracle Whip on pancakes when you eat orange juice with your cookies?!” 

“It’s not that different from drinking a glass of orange juice while eating a chocolate chip pancake!” 

“Yes, it absolutely is!” 

By the time you two have your fill of pancakes, coffee, and arguing, it’s close to five am. Red Robin drops you off on your apartment rooftop. 

“Thanks for the pancakes,” You smile, sliding off his back. “You’re right. I did need that.” 

“Helping is what we do,” He shrugs with a small smile. 

“If only someone could help your taste buds.” 

Red Robin laughs then shakes his head. 

“If you think mine are bad, you should see some of the things my siblings eat.” 

“There’s more of you?” You toss your head back dramatically. “What kind of cursed bloodline do you come from?!” 

Red Robin grins. 

“A diverse one,” He answers vaguely. 

“Seriously,” You tell him, sobering up. “Thank you.” 

“Anytime. If you ever need someone to talk to, go to the roof. I’ll be there,” Red Robin promises. 

“Thanks,” You say softly, then you kiss his cheek. “I’ll see you around, Red.” 

He’s frozen for a moment, then a smile stretches across his face. 

“See you around,” He solutes, then disappears into the night like the bat he is. 

You smile to yourself and walk back to your apartment. Some sleep sounds pretty good now…

So, hey guys! It’s been a minute... 4 months to be exact... Sorry about that. I’m not dead! Just in college. I just finished an 18 credit semester so I’ve been busy and tired. Next semester will not be better. It’s suppose to be my hardest semester of nursing school, so that’s great. I am hoping over break to work through some of my requests. I think to help I’m going to try to make them shorter. I also might delete some, so if yours gets deleted, I’m sorry. Eventually request will open again and you’ll be able to request, but as of now, I’m just trying to get content out and some of the things on the upcoming don’t really do it for me. Anyways, I’ve missed y’all and I’m sorry for the wait. Thank you for being patient, you guys are the best and I hope you enjoyed this vent fic! 

#the cursed discourse we didn't know existed #do not put fucking pineapple or miracle whip on your pancakes #you damn heathens #i have done the orange juice and cookies one #its actually not bad #is it good? #no #but is it bad? #not the worst #tim drake #red robin #tim drake x reader #red robin x reader #uh kind of i guess #if you squint #probably wont write a sequel #since this is a vent fic #batman #dc #request #reader insert #dc reader insert

[lueurdelune]

I’m gonna vent anyway even tho nobody here gives a fuck I’ve had this blog for 5 years and I only have 200 followers and I have made no friends

If whoever created me on this planet was going to give me severe depression and anxiety with a big dash of undiagnosed adhd for 16 years of my life couldn’t they have ATLEAST born me into a financially stable home like honestly that would be so beneficial

I have no motivation to do anything ever for anybody including myself I literally failed my last semester of school. I’ve never done that before and I’m so scared I’m not gonna get into college and I’m never getting any scholarships and I don’t know if my parents can even afford college I’m basically poor but not really I just mean that everybody else around me has so much more money than I do and I feel so shitty all the time I can’t take care of myself I’ve gained so much weight since developing depression over the last 3 years and everybody makes me feel like shit about it but I’m too poor to do anything about either like how the fuck did I go from a size 00 to an 8 I fucking hate myself over it but especially because of how I’ve let others influence how I feel about myself I have literally starved myself for so long AND EVEN THAT DIDNT WORK WHAT THE FUCK??? Anyways like,,, THERES NOTHING WRONG WITH BEING A SIZE 8!!!!! But I’m severely short I’m literally 4’10 and all my life I was a naturally thin person like you know how there’s some people that just ARE thin yeah that was me AND NOW IM NOT BECAUSE IVE SPENT YEARS CRYING IN BED WATCHING TV SHOWS I have no motivation to get up out of bed and it’s been a problem for years but especially now with quarantine it’s so much worse. I have no joy in literally anything. AND I CANT EVEN DO ANYTHING ABOUT ALL OF MY WEIGHT GAIN BECAUSE IM SO DEPRESSED I DONT EVEN HAVE THE WILL TO LIVE ANYMORE I WISH EVERYTHING WOULD STOP AND PAUSE AND THAT THE NUMBERS ON THE SCALE WOULD STOP GOING UP AND MY TEACHERS WOULD STOP ASSIGNING ASSIGNMENTS AND THAT I WOULD STOP LOSING FRIENDS AND THAT I WOULDNT EVER HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT MONEY EVER AGAIN.

And I can’t even get myself out of my financial situation literally ever because I fucking hate school so much I used to be so good at it but the thought of writing one more essay could really be the thing that drives me off the edge and this screwed up system is rigged so the only way to confirm good and true success is through college degrees and I am just now getting treatment for adhd that I’ve had all my life but was too poor to get diagnosed with and that’s been a huge disadvantage to my academic life like insanely and since I’m now horrible in school I won’t go to college and since I won’t go to college I’ll live my life being dirt poor as always and whoever said money can’t buy happiness is a fucking ugly ass liar if I had money I would still be good at school because I would’ve gotten treatment for adhd way long ago which means my depression and anxiety wouldn’t have gotten as bad as they are which means I wouldn’t have gained as much weight as I have which means I wouldn’t be as insecure as I am to the point I literally want to die. Money could’ve made this all avoidable.

I’m having such a pity party for myself right now. Everything that could be wrong in my life currently is except I’m not homeless but I’ve been living in a tiny ass apartment my whole life. Also my family isn’t physically abusive but I’m their mental punching bag which is so hard to accept because I love them so much.

And I’m putting tags on this just because I at least want somebody in this universe somewhere to hear me, to see me, to let me know I’m not as invisible as I constantly feel.

Also if there’s any teens out there who want to be friends 🤪😎😏 slide in my chats I swear I’m funny and pretty (debateable) what other qualities would you want?

#tom hollland #spiderman #spiderman homecoming #tom holland x reader #criminal minds #spencer reid #Matthew Gray Gubler #mgg #spencer reid x reader #art #personal vent #val vents #timothee chalamet #florence pugh #zendeya #euphoria #aesthetic #rant #tw depressing stuff #depression #adhd #friends #life #i'm sad #anxienty #marvel #films #film

[southern-belle-outcasts]

🍵🍵🍵 JUST GIMME SWEET SWEET SALT I LOVE HEARING PPLS VENTS

@sebastianshaw

Send 🍵for the mun’s salt!

- Bonus: Sending a topic can help the mun so they can organize their thoughts better.

You have chosen to allow me to do this with my own discretion and I hope you’re ready for some major fucking salt unloading.

You see that? Imagine instead of a teeny bit of dirt, it was overflowing with salt. Because...I have a lot. Some is very relevant to recent shit. Some is just always there. Anywho, here we go.

The toxicass performative positivity circle-jerk that’s going on in the rpc:

I have no problem providing encouragement. I do it on the regular. Give praise where it’s due, encouragement where it’s needed, AND for the love of the gods and all things good and holy- constructive criticism, people. I see a lot of “if I praise this certain aspect it will get better” very thinly veiled and really that’s not the case. You can’t improve where you don’t feel it’s needed and someone not looking to fix their shit is going to look at the five gushing praises they got and then get shitty when the one person not trying to blow smoke up their ass says something the slightest bit negative but in a constructive, polite manner. Y’ALL ARE DOING NO ONE ANY FAVORS. Fucking stop, please. And if you can’t take polite, constructive criticism, then you either need a disclaimer so people can choose whether they want to interact with you with that in mind, or go find some other hobby that isn’t a fucking COLLABORATIVE activity. Seriously, grow up or find something else. If you are going to interact with other adults, you can be an adult and face if you or your muse have stepped out of line. Can’t do that? Write fanfic, and fanfic only. I’m so serious I can’t even laugh over this. Do NOT claim you are open to constructive cristicism if you aren’t. I’m also now side-eyeing anyone that is constantly patting themselves on the back over not writing a certain thing like toxic ships or Mary-Sues. You doth protest too much. 🤧

Double Standards in the RPC when it comes to customizing your experience:

So apparently, it’s all the rage circa 2019 Dumblr RPC to say that you’re allowed to customize your experience- block as needed, have rules, request triggers, etc. And everyone will be sure to reblog those posts EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. those posts cross their dash. But then when someone adjusts their rules, or makes a comment, or blocks someone, it’s how DARE they do so. They have to put it all on the dash in some rant, or reblog a post with the opposite message immediately. How dare they do exactly what you’ve been throwing onto the dash every other day and encouraging them to do, and work to make their fun time a fun time! I mean, fuck them, right? Why should they have boundaries drawn out, I mean, if they dare to ignore yours then they’re some sort of heinous person, but they should totally let you walk all over them. Bruh. Stop being two-faced and just say you only give a fuck about yourself. Get it out and say it with your chest. Own that dunghill you’re dying on.

The “I’m going to tag every goddamn thing under the sun BUT for the fucking obvious shit” crew:

Before any of you decide to come for my throat for this- I have cPTSD. I have multiple triggers, most are just not to the point I would utilize the blacklist feature, and as I have already stated in my rules, I just unfollow for the certain things that would really bother me. I have spent full days working to come down from a panic attack after being triggered because it was an actual triggering topic or event. I know what a TRIGGER is. Stop. Trivializing. My. Mental. Health. If, for the love of all fuck, you’re going to tag stupid shit like love and domesticity for your sake when it’s “triggering” no one but yourself, but can’t be assed to tag N*SFW and actual kinks, and specific triggers you agreed to tag when agreeing to my rules etc... then you’re just using the concept of trigger tagging for attention and you can kindly go fuck yourself. I don’t care who you are, tagging N*SFW is just basic rpc common courtesy that way even if someone is okay with smexy/intense shit, they can safely scroll around fam/at work/whatevs as needed. I will HAPPILY tag someone’s real trigger. I will NOT feed into your dash pity parties, with the dumb ‘tbd’ tacked on like you’re actually going to delete it when we all know you aren’t going to delete it.

Welp. You said you wanted it. You got it. 😅

#;out of the south #sebastianshaw #;little asks are made of gunpowder and lead

[darkwingsnark]

Tagged by @rebellingstagnationblog and @splatterphoenixart

Rules: Answer 30 questions, it says to tag 20 people but... I don’t know people that might be interested. So if you want , feel free to say I tagged you.

Nicknames: Snark, Snarkieboo, and Mel. Though only wifey is allowed to call me Snarkieboo. (And I honestly prefer Snark by everybody else.)

Gender: lady person I guess

Sign: Aries sun/Libra moon

Height: 5′9″

Time: 11:53 am

Birthday: April 16th

Fav bands: Oingo Boingo, Lordi-- not to be confused with Lorde, though she’s alright, R.E.M, and others I can’t even remember this second.

Fav solo artists: Puddle’s Pity Party, Voltaire... and that’s all I can think of off the top of my head. Honestly outside of a few musicians I’m more of a ‘listen to individual songs because they remind me of cartoon characters’ kind of dude.

Song stuck in my head: Christina Perri - Arms

Last movie I saw: Mickey’s Christmas Carol? A certain somebody had me watching like a billion Christmas Carols the past holiday, with the Muppet version happening before that.

Last show I watched: Steven Universe, but right before that Moonie and I binge-watched all of Star Trek: Discovery.

When did I create my blog: 2011, apparently. 

What do I post: You guys are in for a bumpy ride, because I reblog a lot of my interests-- as well as posting my art and stories. I’ll just say this is just a personal blog with my focus being cartoons and comics.

Last thing I Googled: ‘How many kids does Oswald the Lucky Rabbit have?’ The answer is 420-- blaze it, ya’ll.

Do I have any other blogs: Yes. Vent blog, NSFW blog since I realized a lot of young people follow me and I wanted to separate that, @darkwing-beyond, and some rp blogs like @hateronthego and @askunclequacky. But I don’t RP much these days.

Do I get asks: Sometimes! I tend to appreciate getting feedback from people.

Why did I chose my URL: I used to go by ‘You-Were-Snarked’ on deviantart 8 years ago. But then my account got hacked deleted because of my ex, and so I needed a new account. DarkwingSnark is a mix of my love of Darkwing Duck, and Lewis Carroll’s ‘The Hunting of the Snark’. Which, by the way, is my favorite piece by him. 

Following: 287

Followed by: 2,844

Average hours of Sleep: It’s never the same. Like today I had planned on waking up at 3 pm, but instead was woken up after 4 hours of sleep because SOME PEOPLE like to blast movies at 9 am. ... I get pretty bitter if I don’t get enough sleep.

Lucky number: 7

Instruments: I had to learn to play the recorder. But I’m the only one in my family with no musical skills.... WELL, outside of writing songs.

What I am wearing: My pajamas

Dream job: Some type of story based medium. Animation, Comics, publishing books... I would also love to get into voice acting. 

Honestly it’s hard for me to set realistic goals because of my disabilities and chronic illness-- as I feel like I am constantly getting set back in those regards-- like it has become a thing where I get hospitalized yearly for something major. But I want to dream big, you know? Which is why I just go at my own pace and try and improve in both my writing and art.

Dream trip: I want to go to Disney Land. Like there other other places too, but this has been my ONE TRIP GOAL since I am the animation enthusiast of my family and yet am the only person that has never been able to go.

Fav food: seafood-- specifically salmon.

Nationality: American

Fav song: ‘Gratitude’ by Oingo Boingo? I dunno, it changes depending on my mood.

Last book I read: Last PHYSICAL book? If you mean a story book-- I think it was 4 hears ago and it was one of the ‘Guardians of Childhood’. Though I did read ‘Fox in Socks’ to my nephew before I moved. If comic books count it was probably the last Joe Books Darkwing Duck comic. But if you mean FANFICTION, which I read almost daily, it would be @cavendish-dakota-central ‘s ‘The Things We Do For Fame’ . Good read, by the way.

Top 3 fictional universes I wanna join: Halloween Town (TNBC), Calisota, and Pokemon

#snark memes #long post #snark life

[thedarkenedkeeper]

I had a really vivid dream involving Mark and Jack last night...

...and I'm not okay.

I think now is the time to finally vent and explain what these guys mean to me because after the dream I had, I need some way of venting my feelings. So bear with me, this'll be a LONG post. I apologize in advance!!

For the last three years, I haven't been okay, not entirely. I haven't been "all here" so to speak. To try and keep it brief, every since I graduated in 2014, reality hit me like an oncoming truck - of growing up, how I was going to be an adult and make my own choices, how I would have to either go to school or get a job, make money, eventually move out later down the road, maybe lose connection with friends, etc, etc. On top of this, two very close relatives had passed away two months apart and I had never lost anyone before. And the truth and stress of all of this got to me REALLY bad. And from that point on, my attitude towards things drastically changed. I didn't seem all too excited when I got accepted into university, and when I did go, I really beat myself up. I kept questioning myself as to why I was even there, and convinced myself I wasn't any good, that everyone there was a whole lot better than me. So I dropped out - I avoided my classes and exams, all unknowingly to my folks, who had paid for my education. The next two years only got worse - when I got a few jobs, I didn't seem to care whether or not I would end up getting let go, and just last year, I found out that things between my parents haven't been well. They're still friends and married and live under the same roof, but my mom no longer loves my dad and the fights they had scared my brothers and I so much we were beginning to think they would get divorced.

I started watching Mark, Jack, and a few other YouTubers in November and I found myself watching at least two videos a day because in all honesty, as soon as I pressed play, it seemed like any and all negativity I was going through would instantly vanish. It was like it never existed. I had heard about these guys years ago and had seen a video here and there, but I never was all too interested - I didn't understand the appeal or why they were so popular. But now I do, I totally do. I watch them because they each make me happy. They make me laugh and never fail at making me smile. They know how to entertain their audience and make sure you have about as much fun as they do. And the times when they speak about depression, the need to love yourself, and know you're not alone, it all manages to really tug at my heartstrings. They truly do care about their fans, it's clear as day in their vids, especially the more serious ones. Everytime I watch any one of their videos, my spirits get lifted and I feel like I'm hanging out with a close friend. These guys and their videos are essentially like my therapy - they make me escape from anything negative going on and it's a great feeling. They remind me to stay strong and to not give up, to keep going and know I'm never alone. Their enthusiasm and optimism manage to rub off on me just a bit, and as such, I have been trying hard to keep my head up and think more positive. It's hard, but I'm at least trying and that's what matters.

Now getting into the dream I had last night.

Unfortunately, I don't remember everything about the dream - there are some blurry spots. I don't even remember how it started! I just remember that I was getting ready to go out and was heading out the door to go and meet up with a few close friends to just have a relaxing day. A huge chunk after this is all blurry, so I unfortunately don't remember what led into the next part, but the next part I remember clearly. I had somehow blacked out - I don't know if I was drugged, drunk, I don't know - and I was waking up a bit groggily to suddenly find myself now at my ex-boyfriend's house, except there was a big party going on. And when I mean big party, I mean big! It wasn't just my close friends and I there, there were a bunch of people, some who I had never met! There was a band blaring music, there was a bunch of food and drinks to choose from, there were goodie bags which looked really well put together, and for whatever reason why, both Mark and Jack (my favorite YouTubers) were there, in the back of the room, meeting people and having a great time.  My ex was there. My friend - who had been my best friend for so long but for whatever reason, we don't talk or see each other much anymore - was there with her boyfriend, who was a singer in the band playing there. One of my close friends - who had a crush on me for some time and now I have a crush on him - was there with his girlfriend. Everyone was having a great time!.....Except for me.

I felt invisible, I felt like everyone there was having a blast and didn't take notice in my presence. No one seemed to even notice I was there. I was feeling so many different emotions - I was feeling annoyed, angered, sad, and I was really confused as to how I got there and why a party was going on. And truthfully, I was feeling really uncomfortable being there. I felt like the odd one out, like I didn't belong. Like I was the one person who was invited to the party only out of pity. I felt like everyone there - everyone who was meant something to me - seemed a whole lot happier without me (my ex, my bestie, and my crush). They were all clearly having a great time and didn't notice me, and I was feeling incredibly overwhelmed and upset. So what did I do? I bolted. I bee-lined for the door, left, and raced all the way home, clear across the other side of the neighbourhood, all while taking glances backward to see if anyone was coming after me. I distinctly remember hearing some of them - especially my friends - asking where I was going, why I was leaving, if everything was okay, but I ignored them all. I didn't think anyone cared.

I got home and immediately unlocked the door and got inside to close the door, but the door wouldn't shut, not entirely. There would only be a large enough crack to slip your fingers through. I kept trying to pull it shut, but no matter how hard I tried, it wouldn't close. I was starting to really freak out at this point. I didn't understand what was going on - why I had suddenly shown up at that party, why there was a party, why everyone was having a great time without me, why my favorite YouTubers were there, and why I couldn't close the door. There was too much going on to comprehend and it was seriously upsetting me. I felt like breaking down.

I raced over to the nearby kitchen window to see if anyone had followed me, and sure enough, there were some people from the party who were approaching the house, talking to one another and looking concerned. I bolted back to the door and went to open the door to yell at them to go away, that I wanted to be left alone, only to unexpectedly see both Mark and Jack standing on the doorstep, both looking at me equally as concerned as the people that were waiting by the garage. I froze up, having not seen them walk up to the house at all, and I didn't know what to say. I was more confused than anything. Why were they here?! Why were any of these people here?! What could they possibly want?

I noticed how in Jack's hands he was holding one of the goodie bags I had seen at the party, and there was a tag on it with my name on it in bold italic lettering, clearly informing me that whoever had put together the party had me in mind and had put the effort into making a goodie bag for me. Still not sure what to say, I just watched as Jack handed it to me, and before I could say or do anything, both he and Mark instantly pulled me into a hug. And I'm not talking a quick little hug either - this was a heartfelt hug, the kind you get from someone when you need comforting, the kind when it's tight and warm and you hope to god they never let you go. It was exactly like that. And I was shocked. I didn't understand why they were hugging me, until I heard both of them taking turns at softly whispering to me things like "Everything will be alright....Everything's going to be okay. You're going to be okay...You're not alone, Amanda" over and over again in the most genuine, comforting way possible (I'm tearing up writing this, by the way).

And I lost it. I broke down crying and instantly hugged them back tightly, just letting out all of the sadness, all of the negativity I had been holding inside. It hurt like hell, but they didn't let me go. I could hear that the people who had been out by the garage were now nearby and when I opened my eyes to glance over the guys' shoulders to see them, they were there - my friends - all looking at me concerned but also giving me hopeful looks, almost as if they too were telling me 'everything would be okay'.

My dream ended like that and I surprisingly woke up dazed and confused as opposed to crying. It felt WAY too real too, which only made it all the more upsetting. I kept thinking about this dream all day, and at first, I had no idea why I dreamt up something so vivid and odd. But after a while, I started piecing things together.

The people who were at the party - my ex, my bestie, my crush - they were all people who had made me happy in my life, and the reason I was getting so upset about seeing them was because how everything was changing with them in real life. My ex had broken up with me in December, and since then, I have been happy but at the same time, deep down, I have missed the intimacy and some of the times we had together. My bestie, what with being an adult now, is far more busy with work and moving and such that I rarely get to see or talk to her anymore, and as such, I feel like I've been forgotten or replaced. And my crush, for the longest time, had had a crush on me in grade school and had attempted to get me to like him back, but I never had feelings for him like that. And now I do, when he's already in a relationship, in which it hurts me to see him with someone else.

Having all them together in one room all having a blast without noticing me made me feel horrible, but I think this whole part of the dream was my subconscious telling me that because of these things that have changed, I've made myself become distant. I've become upset by these changes and have deliberately reserved myself, when I shouldn't be - these changes shouldn't get in the way of my friendships.

The part with me running away and getting home to try and close the door was symbolizing how no matter how hard I try to get away from my problems, no matter how bad I want to hide away and convince myself I can be alright on my own, I can never truly get away. I couldn't close the door because no matter hard I tried, I would always have to let someone in. I couldn't shut anyone out, not really. And when it came to get comforted by both my favorite YouTubers, and heard what they said, as well as saw my friends, it was reminding me of both how those guys have been there to comfort me (even though I don't know them personally) and were reminding me how I'm not alone and need to remind myself that my friends actually do care about me.

Fuck, I'm tearing up! That dream was too vivid and far too real, and I can't complain because it pretty much was illustrating how I've been feeling and acting for the last three years. I'm introverted and love my alone time, but I admittedly have been distancing myself from everyone given how I'm scared. I'm scared that everyone is moving on easily without me, that they're all adjusting to adulthood with no sweat - all happy with making money, pursuing their dreams, getting into great relationships - and here I am, not even close to being on the same road as them. It hurts, and I somehow got it in my mind that maybe if I distance myself, things would be better. But I'm wrong, I shouldn't think that way and it isn't helping, it's making the pain worse. And this dream was an eye-opening reminder of that.

These guys may not be my heroes in the way of saving my life - I've never ONCE sunk that low to the point of thinking about suicide and I'm so thankful for that. But they are my heroes in that they're helping me get through any of the dark and negative thoughts I've been occasionally having. They're constantly reminding me to stay strong and fight my inner demons, and honestly, I wish I had gotten into watching their videos around the time when I was going to be graduating. I truly think things would've worked out differently if I had.

If anyone actually read this, I'm glad you took the time to read it and understand what these guys mean to me. Again, I apologize for the long-ass post! It's just that I've seen others' stories and reasons why they look up to Mark and Jack so much, and given the dream I had, I felt now was the best time to vent.

#I feel bad for just how long this came out #didn't mean for this to come out so long! ugh! #so sorry!! #just needed to vent my feelings is all #dreams #my dreams #markiplier #jacksepticeye #dream #vivid dream #inner demons #inner struggles #negativity

[psychicmedium14]

What Your Astrological Sign Says About What Kind of Ex-Girlfriend You Are

Sure, you know what kind of girlfriend you are based on your zodiac sign, but what kind of ex are you? Read on to find out what the stars have to say about your breakup style. Aquarius: The Ex Who Doesn't Look Back: Honestly, PHEW, you're glad things are over now, because you were starting to feel a little cramped. You're super independent, Aquarius, and you need to feel like you have space to be who you want to be, or else you get antsy. You tend to not get bent out of shape after a breakup. After all, your witty conversational skills and charisma make everyone you meet feel super important, which makes it super easy for people to fall for you, HARD. But if someone bores you or can't keep up that signature Aquarius banter, you're out. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Finally booking that trip you've always wanted to talk about. You finally have all this time! What did you even do when you were dating someone? How did you even LIVE? Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: You're out and about they walk by. They're super awkward about the whole thing, which you don't really understand, until you realize you were on a date with someone much hotter than your ex. Pisces: The Nice Ex: Selfless Pisces! You work too hard and are far too nice and trusting to everyone. Your friends are stoked for your break up. They're sick of watching your current boo treat you like any less than the queen that you are, and can't WAIT for you to find someone better. You're hella compassionate and kind, so you try to keep things as amicable as possible with your exes. But your sensitive side means that you also feel breakups pretty intensely. Maybe you didn't even love them! But the second you break up, you're left wondering Was this person my soulmate? Will I spend the rest of my LIFE ON THIS PLANET pining for them? Luckily the answer is no. Your kind, compassionate nature is like friggin' catnip for All the Hot Singles In Your Area and you are able to find new boos to take your mind off of things pretty easily. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Starting a poetry blog that goes viral. Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: They start following your work and accidentally like something on your Instagram from a very chill 38 weeks ago. Aries: The Ex That Got Away: All your exes miss you immediately. Once you're no longer together, they realize just how much they missed that signature Aries wild-streak of spontaneity and confidence. Too bad that's not your problem anymore! It's not like you're sad that you guys broke up because you really miss them — it's more like you're a little insulted they didn't wanna hang around your greatness anymore? Whatever though, you're not bothered you tell yourself while toggling between the 17 OkCupid tabs you have open and swiping with abandon on Tinder. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Gong on a blind date within 24 hours of your breakup. Hey, why wait? Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: They "accidentally" (read: on purpose) run into you by school/work/that bar you always go to with your friends. It doesn't work and you see right through it though, so lmao. Taurus: The Chill Ex: You approach everything super logically, so once you figure out that you guys weren't going to spend the rest of your lives together, you no longer care. Your reliable and stable nature means you often stay friends with exes after the fact. While you may think nothing of it (practically speaking, you'd never date the same person twice. On-and-off-again relationships just don't make sense to you, time-wise), just know that every time you hang out as friends, they're running through your entire relationship in their head, wondering if you'll ever give them a second chance. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Shopping for a new wardrobe or curating some other aspect of your life to your typical Taurusian perfection Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: You see them like, every day, after you become friends again and they won't STFU about their love life in front of you Trying to Make You Feel Something, but you're chill. Gemini: The On-and-Off-Again Ex: You're super adventurous and fearless so breakups are truly NBD to you...but sometimes maybe they should be? Your indecisive nature and charisma make you a perfect storm for on-again-off-again relationships, but you already know this. You can't help it if you've got a knack for starting organic conversation with anyone, including your ex! It's always good to be chill about breakups, but you gotta remember that sometimes they're for the best, especially when you could be gracing someone new with that signature Gemini charm. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Talking it out with a v. therapeutic vent sesh with your best girlfriends. You decompress best when surrounded by lots of love and verbal affirmations that you are indeed, much better than your ex, and much funnier. (You are.) Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: You set up a coffee date later down the line to "catch up" AKA suss out how they're doing post-breakup and are they in a place where you should get back together again? You'll never know unless you ask! Cancer: The Ex That Blocks You on Facebook: I'm not gonna sugarcoat it: breakups hit you pretty hard since you tend to feel emotions very viscerally. And why shouldn't they? You're one of the most loyal and supportive people around, so if someone were to test that trust or commitment, yeah, you'd be pretty hurt. "I don't even care," you choke out between sobs while writing a very harshly worded email that you will never send (you didn't even put their email address in the recipient tab), partway out of fear you'd accidentally hit send and they'd see just how much this actually bothers you, and partway because you can't even admit to yourself how hurt you are. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Going through their tagged photos on Facebook/Instagram to see when/if they're dating somebody new, and WHO IS SHE AND WHAT DOES SHE HAVE ON YOU? Your friends eventually convince you to block them. Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: Never, because you go way out of your way to avoid running into them of course. Leo: The Petty Ex: You're not mad at all. You actually don't even care at a— okay, you're a little mad. Maybe not mad, just a lil' insulted that you wasted your time with someone who wasn't as perfect as you. Ok, FINE, you're also really hurt that someone didn't see you for the star that you are. And yeah, it doesn't feel good that you were probably more into them than vice versa. You can't help it though, you're just a straight shooter who doesn't play games, so why play hard to get? It sucks to put yourself out there and have that met with anything but matching enthusiasm. You might try to overcompensate with coolness and try to remain friends, but eventually you realize you were never really friends in the first place. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Trying to make a mumblecore indie short film about your experiences together a la Adam from the last season of GIRLS for some sense of closure. Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: You invite them to your Broadway debut 20 years down the line, but you're not salty. It's just, like a light "f*ck you" move you know? Super casual. Virgo: The Ex That Can't Let Go: You look for some Greater Meaning in everything — methodically analyzing every move trying to learn from it. You vacillate between crying your eyes out, or thanking your lucky stars the universe hath delivered you from this fuccboi. You continue to go through your old message history looking for red flags after the fact, convinced if you could only find the turning point it would bring you some closure. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Shell-shocked, rocking back and forth whispering "I just don't get it." Your friends GTFO there after two days of trying to convince you everything will be okay. You know that, but you just gotta process stuff at your own pace. Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: You do a very calculated Hot Girl Pivot™ where you examine and reevaluate every aspect of your life to seem Cooler, Better, Faster, Stronger and broadcast it from all your social media channels until he's the very first viewer on all your Snapchat stories. Libra: The Friendly Ex: Since you tend to be non-confrontational, things usually get *pretty* bad for a breakup to even happen, which leads to a lot of unspoken bitterness for both parties. You'll go out of your way to be diplomatic and make sure everyone knows that you hold no ill will, but really, you'll never forgive them for wasting your time. No matter though! You're charming AF and hotties start falling into your orbit almost immediately after any breakup. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: If you're *really* shook, you go to law school or something. If you're only a little shook, you make a bunch of fire Spotify breakup playlists and waddle around in your PJs pitying yourself for exactly 1/7th of the time you were together, or until a new crush comes your way. Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: You see them all the time, because you're "friends" and you totally "don't care" that they're now dating a carbon copy of yourself at all haha, why? Scorpio: The Stone-Cold Ex: Damn, where do I start Scorpio? For starters, all your exes are scared of you. You know that right? You're real quick to call someone out and will not hesitate to bring up receipts from like, four tax seasons ago. And good luck to them if they hurt you, because you'll dedicate all your waking hours to getting them back. If an ex is lucky enough to escape your wrath, you'll just go straight for the freeze and cut off all communication with them forever. It's like you never existed. You deal with breakups about as well as you'd think, which is very intensely. You may seem tough on the outside, and you are pretty fearless, but you also tend to beat yourself up about them, wondering if you did something to chase them off/make things fall apart. The older you get, the more you realize, it's not always somebody's fault and that sometimes people just aren't a match, and breakups get easier and easier the older you get. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Flirting with the idea of hooking up with their best friend/roommate/boss to just really drive in that power play that you "won" the breakup. Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: When you start parading around the fact that you're now hooking up with someone close to them. Spoiler: it doesn't feel good for any party involved. Sagittarius: The Ex Who Will Always Secretly Hope for Something More: You're so funny and witty that it's a little too easy for you to become friends with your exes after you breakup. Of course you don't mind though. You'll give a ton of lip service about how "you're just friends" till the ends of time, but at the same time, if they ever wanted to pursue something again, you'd sign up right away. But you'll never make the first (second) move. You're stubborn enough to not want to be the one to pursue an on-again-off-again dealio, but conveniently not stubborn enough to move on completely. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Setting your ex up with a friend just to prove how "totally over it" you are. You're not, and you finally realize this when they actually hit it off and you don't know how to backpedal and say you didn't mean for this to happen. Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: You see them on Tinder and it hits you that they're like, actively looking to date other people, which even though you'd been broken up for months, hurts you in ways you didn't realize you could be offended by? Haha. Nice. You consider moving away or getting really into cycling classes. You wind up doing neither, but it gets easier every time. Capricorn: The Glo-Up Ex: You're honestly stoked to be single again. What a great chance to meet new people and trade up for a hotter/smarter/funnier model. Sure, your friends might think this is a little cruel when you explain your lack of grieving period, but it works. Your ex was a little dull anyways, and they were always gonna disappoint you in one way or another. They probably just couldn't handle you. Sure, it hurts a little, but ultimately you're grateful for the chance to meet somebody who really gets you. And super grateful you don't have to pretend to like the same things anymore. Most Likely to Be Doing This After a Breakup: Dating somebody who is the total opposite of your ex, just to see what it's like. Situation in Which You'd Most Likely Run into Your Ex: You run into each other at a mutual friend's party and you don't even realize it until they text you about it later. Oops! Oh well. You remain unbothered.

#horoscope #astrology #relationship