#be in charge of shit????????????????????????????

[howtofightwrite]

Most traditional boxing instructors will tell you that if the opponent is taller than you, has longer arms than you, or is heavier than you, you're fucked and you need to stay extremely aware and work really hard to compensate for all the advantage he has over you.

In a recent forensic survey, it was determined that most traditional boxing instructors who get into real world altercations die when they're shot in the head.

This is the problem with a lot of these kinds of arguments. No one practices traditional boxing. At least, no one does so publicly. How do I know this? Because traditionally boxers fought in the nude. Yeah, we're not seeing that, are we? Now, maybe they meant bare knuckle boxing, but really no one does that either, these days. Boxing without safety equipment is not a particularly good idea, for fairly obvious reasons.

The only reason the word, “traditional,” is in the ask is to lend their statement unearned credibility. It's an attempt to make their statement sound more authoritative, without offering any evidence to support the statement.

Who said that?

“Traditional people did.”

Okay, but, 'traditionally,' people cleaned shit off their ass with a stick. So, maybe appealing to Hellenic sports isn't the best gauge of how a fight will play out.

Also, I know I just said it, but, who are these authoritative sports guys? Because they're not named. We're simply told, “most,” of them agree. Which starts to sound a lot like “four out of five dentists agree.” Who are these instructors? What do they teach? Why are the currently in prison for indecent exposure? And how much did you pay them to get their uninformed opinion? Salient questions which may need to be answered, if the original question wasn't invalid on its face.

Why do I say it's invalid?

Because boxing isn't fighting.

Boxing is a sport.

Boxing has rules.

Kick your opponent in the groin, or shin, and you're punished.

Step on their foot, push them, and watch them tumble to the ground before you start stomping on them, and you'll be punished.

Throwing your opponent will be punished.

And of course, as mentioned at the top, pulling out a gun and expanding your opponent's mental horizons is extremely frowned upon.

These are all things that can happen in a real fight.

These are all things that do not benefit from increased height or reach.

There is one genuinely accurate statement. In a fight, you do need to be very aware of what's going on around you. Everything else is the product of someone who's been punched in the head repeatedly until the CTEs got them thinking that boxing is analogous to a real fight in any way. (And, statistically, will probably end their career sitting in a jail cell over an aggravated assault charge, because their emotional self-control was completely destroyed by those same head injuries.)

The rules that boxers need to follow are designed to (somewhat) protect the participants. It reduces the dangers of a boxer being killed in the ring. In an observation that I would hope to be self-evident, those rules don't exist in actual combat.

It's also amusing, because the original Asker had to go so far as to single out an ill-defined, “traditional” boxing, because no other martial art they checked gave them the soundbite they wanted.

And, of course, women box. Historically, you could say, “traditionally,” there were even boxing matches between men and women. It wasn't until the 1880s that women were excluded from competitive boxing in the UK. (I'm not sure of the exact date when women were banned from boxing in the US, though that prohibition lasted for less than a century, before the modern return of women to the sport.)

So, either these “traditional instructors” don't know the history of their own sport... which doesn't sound particularly “traditional” to me, or they're full of shit.

My advice to everyone would be, maybe, don't take the advice of a sports coach about how he's secretly an absolute badass in all the delusional fantasies he's cooked up about how he'd like to inflict violence on others because they wouldn't date him.

-Starke

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#writing reference #writing advice #writing tips #how to fight write #starke answers

[buckleydiazincorrect]

*3am on a q-word shift, everyones still awake for unrelated sleep issues - its been silent for 15 minutes*

Ravi: here’s a fun question

Bobby: oh god here we go

Ravi: if you were in a BDSM relationship, would you be the dom or the sub?

Chim: sub, definitely. but maybe like a hint of brat, testing the limits of what i can get away with or some shit

Ravi: i can see that

Hen: i’d probably flip between the two depending on the vibe ya know? its nice to be taken care of sometimes but also being in charge? nice

Ravi: good answer

Eddie: dom i think? i refuse to elaborate

Ravi: no elaboration necessary, you are definitely a dom

Buck: *deep in thought*

Ravi: buck?

Buck: oh umm yeah i dunno probably-

HenChimEddie: sub

Ravi: that makes sense

Buck: i’d try to argue with you but i am at least partially self aware

Hen: oh yeah?

Buck: yeah like if someone wants to choke me, throw me around a little, or smack me until i cry, go ahead. but like can you at least toss me a good boy once in a while? dare i say, call me pretty? i’m literally begging you to fuck me at this point, a compliment won’t kill you

Ravi: i bet you’d get so many good boys

Bobby: *on the verge of tears* HR is terrified of you people

#evan buckley #incorrect 911 quotes #evan buck buckely #911 incorrect quotes #eddie diaz #911 on abc #hen wilson #bobby nash #chimney han #ravi panikkar

[deniseseine]

Do you think you'd kill for me one day?

Asking hsr men if they'd kill for you pt.1

Sunday 🪽

You saw a trend on TikTok where people will use the audio to see if their s/o will kill for them one day

You want to do the trend with him honestly

You hesitated to ask him when you saw the trend because you think he'd be busy

You got curious as to what Sunday will answer

So you asked him because he loves you after all

"It depends, if it's for the better then I will not hesitate to kill someone" Sunday says while smiling

You two did a TikTok as Robin was the one to first repost supportive sister in law fr

Ratio 🤓

You were looking for a thirst trap song in TikTok and found the sound

You loved the lyrics and the vibes

Then you suddenly stopped and asked yourself if your smart boyfriend would kill someone for you

You were hesitant to ask him

But you were curious so you asked him

You were trembling because he might do a 7 hours lecture with your one simple question

"Absolutely not, I don't wanna get arrested because of something illegal" Ratio said so casually

He actually was serious that he won't kill someone for you because he ain't wanna deal with lots of tough shit bro

Aventurine ♠️

He was actually the one who asked you the question

He was scrolling through TikTok and saw the trend

He was giddy and went to you

Because he's your beloved lover of course he's expecting a yes

If you said no, bro's gonna sulk fo' a week🙏

"Do you think you'd kill for me one day?" he asked

You are the one in charge of answering his question... Although he'd be content about either of your answer after all he's only worth sixty Tanba

Thank you for reading 💕

ALSO SORRY FOR AVEN IN THE END I'M JUST JOKING I WANNA GIVE ANGST, please invite me to yall's aventurine themed birthday party😔🙏 I'm sorry gangggg😭

#hsr #honkai star rail #aventurine #hsr aventurine #aventurine x reader #dr ratio #veritas ratio #ratio x reader #sunday hsr #sunday x reader

[logicallyblind]

Okay okay but consider possible batfam fic idea:  

so Bruce is in an emergency justice league meeting that got called but because its taking place at night he has a comm on in his ear playing at a low volume because all of the batfam are out on patrol around gotham covering his patrol route for him and because you know B is a paranoid, overprotective fucker he just to make sure everything is going smoothly for his kids but he doesn’t plan on actually letting them know he’s tapped into their network because he can already hear the lecture from Dick about trusting them to take care of the city.  

So he’s listening to them quietly while also paying attention to Clark talking about some alien diplomacy issue and his kids are YAPPING away about the stupidest shit to one another cause they don’t have B telling them off for ‘unprofessional unnecessary chatter while on patrol’ and  you’re getting a mix of all the dynamics between them all and the longer the meeting is going on the more B’s eye is just TWITCHING because his Dad senses are just going hay wire and he is just here like ‘I cannot say anything in front of the league because they cannot know I have children cause I'm Batman and I work alone blah blah blah’, usual brooding, but Damian and Tim are squabbling with one another about a rescue that took place an hour ago and Dick is challenging Jason to a parkour contest and Steph is challenging the Riddler to a riddle off with riddles she made up and have no answer just to piss him off and his dad sense is just like an alarm going off and then he just cant take it anymore cause Duke (pretend he’s on nightshift to make up for the man down or smth idk shh) says something like ‘I'm going to do my book report in the morning Richard leave me be’ even though Bruce KNOWS he isn't going to do it in the morning, this has happened before they have an AGREEMENT, a CONTRACT god damn it but they don't know Bruce is listening to the comms Duke just goes something like “its fine B won't even find out!” and Bruce just LOSES it there and then and just presses his comm and goes “NO. No, stfu all of you I am taking charge here” and he just starts going off on them all for the different things they were whining about like

“No Signal, go and do your damn book report right now you are not going to be doing it in the morning you always say you will and you never wake up early enough to get it done so then you end up speed doing it in the car while nearly stress crying and I am cannot deal with that while running on 49 hours of no sleep so go and do it right this damn minute. I am TIRED, I am tired boy go. GO. I love you, goodnight.” 

“N go and unload the damn dishwasher. I asked you four. FOUR days ago to do it and A is not coming home until next week please I am begging you I have been drinking my coffee out of bowls and a straw for days now. Thank you, I love you goodnight.”  

“Red Robin. Put the coffee down. No- I know its in your hand I can feel it. I can feel it in my BONES child you cannot hide from me, down. Now. Good. Get a piece of fruit and go to bed. No I don't give a fuck if- no. I don't care if the pentagon has laughably easy security to bypass right now it has been over 72 hours since you closed your eyes I WILL call A I will, I’ll do it right now. I’m calling him right now- good okay goodnight. I’m sending Dick to check on you to make sure you’re actually sleep. I love you too goodnight”  

“Robin I know you're there. Damn right go to bed, Titus can go with you yes you don't have to ask every night baby its going to be the same answer, I love you goodnight.” 

“Hood and Spoiler stop trying to goad rogues into fighting each other and go home. Hood will you- thank you. Goodnight I love you both....no S I will not ask Ivy if she’ll make you real life lil shop of horrors plant to leave at your ex’s house please stop asking. Goodnight.”   

"C are you- I love you too."

And he just lets out this enormous, patented Dad sigh and looks up after a few moments and realizes the entire justice league is just watching him absolutely GOBSMACKED because oh my god how long has this been going on for?? because like what the fuck this was cold, calculated, ‘they think he's actually a robot’ Batman, who just all of a sudden just went BOOM father mode is activated, this is a patriARCH, you know? Daddy bats alright. And he's just like, his facial expression doesn't so much as twitch but a light blush just appears on his entire face and then Clark is just like HEART EYES and Hal is just like HEARTEYES (??!!) and Barry is suddenly having a sexuality crisis because what the fuck is this, and Diana is just like, speechless but in love and he just mumbles after a few moments “...you can continue your speech Clark I apologize for my lapse in professionalism” and Hal is just like “NAH MOTHERFUCKER YOU ARE NOT BREEZING PAST THAT WHAT THE FUCK SPOOKY??” and then the entire situation just devolves in chaos.  

#ithese are all kinda ooc but shhhh i live in a fishbowl #idk i just want tired single parent bruce doing his best with his chaotic gremlins #dont ask me what timeline this is in because i got nothing for yall #batman #bruce wayne #jason todd #dc #dick grayson #batfam #stephanie brown #tim drake #damian wayne #clark kent #hal jordan #barry allen #diana prince #wonder woman #superman #green lantern #the flash #nightwing #red hood #robin #red robin #duke thomas #cassandra cain #superbat #batlantern #wonderbat #spoiler

[gabessquishytum]

Dream is the highest of high society Omega; he and Hob Gadling were never supposed to meet.

❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

Omegas have more say now in who their mated Alphas are, but high society omegas still marry for status and family name, with barely a thought for true matings or scenting/compatibility. And even as all omegas have more personal freedoms these days - they can open bank accounts on their own and even own real property without an Alpha co-signer, it is still rare for an omega to go and pick an alpha not chosen for them by their parents.

One of the only things that could "save" an omega from the machinations of their families would be to find their true mate. True mates are one of the last things truely protected in this society, given how rare they are.

❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

Dream was prepared to accept whichever Burgess his parents said he had to marry - hopefully it wasn't the horrible patriarch, but at this point no one ("appropriate") was coming to save Dream from his fate; and sure Dream would love to save himself, but he was too high profile of an omega to just skip out on his family's plans.

Hob wasn't even supposed to be catering this high society party. Some aggressive food poisoning or something sweep the original team and Hob just happened to have space to take the party on (and charge triple his usual fee).

Hob hates all these rich alpha and omega a$$holes. As an Alpha himself, Hob always finds it weird that most of these rich "mated" pairs all smell like they hated each. It makes Hob's nose itch.

❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

When Hob got to the Endless house to set up, he kept getting distracted by a smell in the air - he would start doing something, smell the illusive scent, then completely forget what he was doing. Hob got through and set everything up, but it was puzzling.

Dream had been distracting himself all day, pacing from room to room while the party people setup for his "engagement" party. Endless don't get nervous, but Dream started getting sweaty and even more fidgety -- there seemed to be something in the air.

Then it happens, just before the big announcement -- Dream bumps into someone and overbalances; he's caught as he face-plants into someone's neck.

Dream's first thought after his parents are going to kill him for embarrassing them, is wow, and then his whole body relaxes.

Hob's first thought after "mate" is he will kill anyone who takes this from his arms.

Holy shit this is great!

Hob is just about to sweep Dream properly into his arms and maybe dip him into a super romantic kiss, when Dream frantically pulls him away in a nearby storeroom. He explains that he's the omega who the engagement party is for! This whole situation is too much - there's no way he can walk out into the party and announce that actually, his true mate in the catering guy and he's now going to whisk Dream away into the sunset. Hob is kinda like "Well why not?" but he doesn't want to do anything that will put Dream in danger. So he sneaks Dream down into the kitchens, and they try valiantly to keep their hands off each other but it's very hard.

Death comes looking for her little brother and finds him nestled up in Hob’s lap being scented and caressed. She rolls her eyes because this is all SO Dream - of course something dramatic had to happen to him. But of course she's also going to help him out. She heads back upstairs and manages to divert all the Burgesses into one of the side rooms, to talk to them about Dream’s dowry or some other archaic alpha stuff. Meanwhile, Dream also heads upstairs to the ballroom where all the other guests are waiting. He's hand in hand with Hob.

Hob speaks quietly to the guy at the door who announces who is coming in. And he and Dream enter the ballroom together - "the happily engaged couple and true mates: omega Dream Endless, and alpha Robert Gadling". Dream's siblings break into applause and although his parents look thunderstruck, there's nothing they can do except go and tell the Burgesses the bad news.

Dream is kind of in a whirlwind of emotions. He doesn't know Hob at all, but so far the alpha has been so nice and respectful to Dream. Fetching him food and drinks, finding him somewhere to sit, holding his hand. And he smells absolutely divine to Dream. He can hardly stop himself from climbing right back into Hob’s lap and curling up right there. He's so so relieved when Hob gently guides him out of the party after a polite amount of time has elapsed. Dream didn't have to ask, Hob just knew.

They end up going out to Hob’s catering van for some peace and quiet, and to talk. Dream shyly tells Hob that he has no obligation to marry him if he doesn't want to, just because they're true mates... and Hob just laughs. He's going to marry Dream and be the most annoying son in law to the Endlesses and he's going to absolutely worship his omega every day for the rest of time. That's all he wants, as long as Dream will have him.

And yes, they do some things in the back of that catering van that make the wedding a little more of an urgent matter, but who can blame them? They've been desperate ever since they first caught the scent of each other. Those scents finally combining into one as they sweat and rub against each other is like the scent of coming home <3

#the sandman #dreamling #nsft #cw omegaverse

[xxlovelynovaxx]

Y'know, there are a lot of people in my communities offline and online that... I'd cook for, help clean their house, help them move, share their fundraisers, give them rides to an appointment when I had access to a vehicle, donate to them if I could... who I also wouldn't willingly share casual spaces with, wouldn't tolerate their harmful behavior in a support group (though, if I were leading it, would issue repeat private verbal warnings before taking any action, and even divide into multiple sessions to still offer both the people they're hurting and them the support needed), and so on.

That's what I mean a lot of the times when saying "I won't allow unsafe people in my communities". It's not "I'll violently expel and ostracize (and encourage others to do so) those doing significant harm who are themselves marginalized". It's "I will take steps to reduce the harm being done while not doing further harm in doing so". It's "I recognize that identity does not make you inherently safe, so I focus on actual harm rather than who is doing it, and that also means I'm careful not to just end up displacing the harm by doing it myself".

Of course, I'm not perfect. If someone who is marginalized themself is openly reveling in and bragging about bullying and hurting others, and then turning around and claiming that objectively harmless behaviors from their victims are actually harming them, in essence playing the victim outside of situations where they actually are the victim... yeah, at a certain point I'll become reactive, especially if we are both marginalized on the axis of gender but they have power over me or others on another axis (race, intersex identity, disability, etc).

That's just abuser behavior, and as much as I try as much as possible to never be reactive, I also have grace for myself reacting imperfectly as a trauma and abuse survivor. Hell, this is why I DON'T want to be in a position of being the person in charge of these things that has the power to push people out on my own. I'd much rather have plenty of people to be able to de-escalate when someone HAS become reactive, while addressing the initial harmful behavior separately.

Idk this is just some ramblings on my personal philosophy but like. Community building does mean practicing harm reduction but that also means leaving space for people to mess up and do harm and struggle or even refuse to unlearn shit without being tossed out on their ass in the cold because, well, this is especially true given most of the time they don't have alternative spaces they CAN access when marginalized so it's kinda a case of "each other's all we've got".

And yes there's "don't tolerate intolerance" ofc but it's also "it's more effective to deradicalize someone and especially to do so in ways that are compassionate and understanding than to just isolate them and drive them further into hate" and also "sometimes the harm is directly tied to something like trauma or a disability in a way that can't immediately be changed and then it's on the community rather than the individual to find a solution that reduces the most harm possible without punishing someone for symptoms that they legitimately are struggling to or can't control".

Basically, there's ✨nuance!✨

And like this is all gonna be different too depending on the type of harm and what social dynamics are at play. You handle bigotry/oppression differently than you handle lateral aggression differently than you handle mixed cases (such as transintermisia from a perisex trans person) differently than you handle any other number of cases of harm.

Idk I just care more about being effective than being right. And I know I revert into injured animal snarling a lot on here but tbf I'm also NOT actively engaging in community building or w/e on my 250 follower blog with max 20 followers active at any given time. I do also think it's important to have injured animals spaces too and maybe this isn't the best one but rn it works okay as mine.

So... yeah. Complicated thoughts on a complicated subject.

[fakeoutbf]

five stages of grief but it’s five stages of social anxiety

#walk with me #this morning i got a bouquet delivered to me at work randomly out of nowhere #the note basically said that i could count of the person even if for just some words of advice or a gesture that could make me laugh or mad #count on the person** #i immediately knew it’s from one of my coworkers and ngl i have a very charged?? relationship with them #in the sense that it’s very intense and we can be laughing joking and teasing or we can be really angry and pissed with each other #it can have very extreme emotions even if we just chill most of the time #idk why i think this whole year i’ve been leaning on them more?? and we started texting more often too #so we’ve been more properly friends lately #and for one i was SO EMBARRASSED for getting flowers bc my coworkers tease the shit out of everyone myself included and i’m not used to #gestures like that so obviously they were on my ass all day about it #and everyone asked about them and it’s EMBARRASSING to get that much attention #(me: i wanna be a singer / also me: can’t stand to be the center of attention) #anyway the person that sent them avoided me yesterday out of nowhere??? idk if they thought i was mad bc i didn’t reply to their texts all #weekend but i literally never reply to anyone and pms was a bitch and i just wanted to be alone #so they didn’t talk to me on monday i was mostly just working listening to music bc i was still emotional whatever #and today i did talk to my other coworkers bc it’s the day when my favorite coworker comes in and i talk to them a lot so i engaged more #and they were still ignoring me and then the flowers came in and we didn’t say a single word to each other today we just texted #they told me they sent them and that ‘they forgot’ what they sent and that it was just meant to be a nice gesture #and that bc they wanted to ‘surprise’ me and make me feel better bc i said i was sad at one point?? idek #i literally just want to tell them I HAD PMS ITS FINE I FEEL SUICIDAL ALL THE TIME and move on #bc now i’m second guessing everything they’re saying bc i thought we were friends and there’s no reason why friends can’t send each other #flowers or whatever but they’ve been avoiding me and then they keep answering my texts really weirdly and i always misinterpret flirting bc #i’m never outright romantic with anyone?? plus we’re FRIENDS i should have no reason to think that’s changed #but they’re being so weird and why get me FLOWERS??? idk get me a chocolate or a coffee i don’t NEED flowers #and then i said it was random to give me flowers out of nowhere and they’re like no it’s serious bro what’s serious?????? #your feelings towards me?? or just your will to cheer me up??? #if they don’t reply straight up in their next texts i’m gonna flat out say but it was a platonic gesture right??? #so yeah i’m overthink getting flowers bc what’s the social code for that and what is one supposed to do when they get flowers from a friend #delivered to their joint workplace where everyone can see them and think they’re from a partner or something

[piratecaptainscaptainpirates]

"What about this one?"

Ed tucked his smile against Stede's bare shoulder as he felt Stede's fingers circle around his wrist, and he propped himself up properly, folding his hand beneath his chin. The scar on the side of his wrist was a skinny, fishhook-shaped thing, faded with age. "Must've been about...I dunno, nineteen, maybe? Tried to impress some guy by spinning my knife around my finger and it slipped."

Stede, encouraged by Ed's huff and fond eyeroll at his teenage antics, laughed, the arm around Ed's shoulders pressing down into the small of his back.

This was a game they played, sometimes. Stede picked the smaller scars, most of the time, the ones without too much baggage. He'd never asked about the ugly knotted scar above Ed's hip, or the nasty twisted thing that pushed his kneecap sideways, or the faded X carved over Ed's heart, and definitely not the even, uniform scars on his thighs that had been covered up with shaky tattoos of flowers and hearts and sharks.

There were lots of scars that weren't those, and Ed didn't mind most of them. Past foolishness, past bravery. Stede's favorite scars were the cluster of puncture scars on Ed's tummy and the long, swooping scar under his chest, because they were proof of living, of outsmarting the world. He liked to lick the scar under Ed's chest during intimate moments to make him whimper, knew just how to rest his hand on that sensitive patch of tummy to make Ed gasp.

And, tonight, Ed was halfway towards taking this little game somewhere. He had a very convenient scar from his twenties (didn't fully clear the railing during yardies and landed on a deeply unfortunate section of wood) right along the crease of his hip that Stede could explore -

Stede's voice turned thoughtful, then, his fingers trailing over Ed's shoulder blades. "Don't tell me if you don't want to. But what about...these?"

Ed practically bit his tongue. Those things were faded to hell, only really visible along his shoulders though they'd once stretched down to the small of his back. They were from the first and only time he'd ever gotten flogged.

Ed pushed himself up, resting fully on top of Stede's chest, now, his arms crossed under his chin. "So," he started. "I don't think I'd turned fifteen yet."

"Oh, Ed," Stede whispered, his face crinkling with sympathy.

Yeah, Ed thought, he wanted to get this one out. Pretty often, Stede's reactions to the rough ones felt like cleaning an old wound.

See, if his plan for that day had worked, he probably would've described it as his first fuckery. Because he meant to get caught stealing extra food, and he'd had a plan that seemed perfect.

He'd been sailing on ol' Hornigold's crew for maybe three months. And one of the other cabin boys looked out for the fresh ones. He was a couple years older than Ed, always shared the food he stole and never got caught. Ed had had the biggest crush of his young life on Felix.

Now, Jack had told him one night that floggings weren't shit. Jack was about Ed's age, but he'd been around longer, so Ed had believed him. Jack had said there was nothing to it, you just had to bite your tongue a bit and it'd be over before you knew it.

Ed should've known something was up when he'd winked at Jack and Felix over his shoulder as he was marched to the mast and they'd looked scared out of their heads. He'd stuck his tongue out at them through his smile, cheerfully admitted to his charges, imagining laying in Felix's arms that night as Felix gently patched him up -

The first strike took the breath out of Ed's lungs. He'd screamed himself hoarse by the time it was finally, finally over, laid there on the deck sobbing for much longer as Jack and Felix tried to stand him up.

The worst part was how the older guys laughed, even the ones Ed had thought were pretty cool just that morning. Ed would never look at anyone the same again, for as long as he lived.

He had wound up in Felix's arms that night, but he'd still been too busy crying his eyes out to really appreciate it.

"Pretty fucked up," Ed concluded. Stede's face was all crumpled up, his lip wobbling, and Ed gently cupped his face in his hands. "I'm alright, babe, c'mon. I'm right here."

Stede's voice was steady enough. "Are we sure everyone who laughed at you is already dead?"

"Yeah," Ed snorted, leaning forward to press a kiss to the tip of Stede's nose. "Stede, man, really, it was so long ago -"

"That's the worst part," Stede said. "You were fourteen, Ed! You deserved so, so much better."

Ed paused.

Stede met his eyes, taking Ed's hand and holding it tight between both of his. "You deserved so much better," he said firmly. "You are precious, Ed, and you deserve to be treated like it."

Maybe Ed couldn't fully believe that, not all the way, not just yet. But he wrapped his arms around Stede, tucking himself in sound and safe. "You treat me like I'm precious."

Stede's hand landed on his shoulders, rubbing gently, like he was trying to soothe the pain of decades-old wounds. "Making up for lots of lost time."

#ofmd #our flag means death #ofmd fic #ofmd minific #whump #tw injury #this wasn't enough for a full fic but i thought it was still compelling enough to share!

[l0tt1emy]

I've been sitting on this idea: shauna x reader where the reader is jackie's sibling and they have to keep it on the downlow, and jackie almost walks in on them

Summary: Your sister Jackie leaves you and Shauna alone to go buy things, and comes back at the worst moment

Warnings: swearing, light nsfw type very light, no pronouns used :3

A/n:Hii babyyy, I didn't know if you wanted it after or not...so I didn't smuut!! If you want you can send me an ask okay?:3

Maybe it was wrong to never tell your best friend that you were dating her sibling, especially when your best friend is Jackie taylor

you were always very similar to jackie in some aspects, be it your popularity, your way of acting and even your appearance that reminded her a little

Jackie had been friends with Shauna for years, since she considered herself a person, When you were born, Jackie and Shauna were already best friends, Shauna before you were born, she would play at Jackie's house and talk about doll houses, barbies and movies she liked, but After you were born, every day at Jackie's house was different, before in Jackie's backyard, now it was in your room, with sweet smells and toys scattered everywhere, Shauna no longer wanted to play alone with Jackie, but with you

Jackie was so jealous of her best friend that she told her mother to get the baby when Shauna came, and Shauna, despite not understanding why Jackie sibling had disappeared from their room, she didn't question it.

With each passing time, Jackie had already forgotten that, she invited you to her parties with is yellowjackets, she wanted you to be popular like her, so even though you weren't part of the yellowjackets, all the girls knew who you were, you always I was at Lottie's or even Shauna's parties

So Shauna thought it best not to tell her that she had literally been dating you for months, she didn't know how Jackie would react, but if she were to guess, she would know that she would point her finger in her face while saying "You should have told me before shipman" and above all, I wouldn't be here by your side now

" Do you agree that it's going to be romance, right?" Jackie's voice hollows "but Shauna already said she wants suspense" her voice interrupts Jackie "but I'm in charge here, and I'm older than you" she murmurs and shrugs while You squint your eyes and continue watching the TV, you roll your eyes and dramatically throw yourself onto the pile of pillows

“So boring right shauna?" you say, sounding more like a statement than a question, you don't even wait for her answer and nod "Yeah yeah..I agree" you say ironically and look at the ceiling" How were the cupcakes?" you say to jackie and the question remains in the air, jackie widens her eyes slightly "shit...I forgot!" she throws the controller on the sofa "I need them to take that photo so Jeff can be jealous. .." she mutters to herself too loudly and i roll my eyes "Shipman watch my sibling, I'll be right back" Jackie says breathlessly and grabs her bag "don't change the movie!" she says on the stairs and you quickly hear the door closing

The room is silent and you look at shauna "Is she really going to that bakery?" you say with a frown and shauna gets up taking the remote "you know what she's like" she gives a sideways smile that looks like a frown "at least we don't have to watch that shitty movie" she rolls her eyes and you nod your head while looking at her sideways "ok...go to my backpack and get those snacks" shauna says while moving the TV

you slowly get up and crawl over to the backpack and open it, giving a smile at the sight of your favorite cookie, your cheeks turn red "I haven't had this in so long..." you say to shauna, not knowing if she was listening or not, a hollow voice like laughter "I know" then everything is silent

you bite your lip and pick up the snacks, walking to the table, without looking at Shauna yet, who was doing something on the TV.

"Will Jackie be late?" You say as you eagerly open the snacks" I hope so" shauna says "what?" "I said I hope she doesn't take long" She rolls her eyes as if you told her to repeat it 10 times, she turns away from the television "that's much better" she smiles and looks at you eating your snack for a moment, then sits next to you without touching you

The minutes pass and Shauna starts to relax, too much, she comes close to you and takes your arm, while placing your leg over hers, then her hand goes up to your right thigh gently, she leaves her hand still for a moment, and you feel your thigh burning slightly but you keep looking at the movie, then shauna starts to gently rub your thigh, and her fingers open as if she are exploring more

"what are you doing Shauna?" you murmur, still looking at the television "nothing baby.." She says and gives a smile, her eyes leaving the movie that she obviously wasn't even paying attention to

she puts her face in the crook of your neck and kisses softly, you blush and look at her sideways "shauna.." "shh" she interrupts, She kisses your neck, giving open and wet kisses, then the kisses move up to your chin, giving small kisses and moving up to your lips

" We can't do this" you say and she narrows her eyes "Why? We're dating" she says bluntly, her hand leaving your thigh and going up to your neck, pulling your face to hers and kissing you

You tense up and don't know how to react for a moment, then you lean into her and melt, kissing her like there's no tomorrow, your fingers finding her hair and pulling her impossibly closer

shauna's hands go to your waist and she squeezes possessively, while letting out small moans, she makes you lie down while she climbs on top of you aggressively "I want you so much" shauna lets out in breathless moans, while placing her hand on the waistband of your shorts "I couldn't stand seeing you at that party and not being able to just hold you against the wall and kiss you" she admits and kisses your collarbone, slowly moving down

" what the hell it's that!" Jackie shouts, clearly irritated and you see her placing several cupcakes, cakes and snacks on the table, shauna stands up abruptly from above you

"I said not to change the movie! What a horrible movie!" Jackie says, running towards the remote and pausing the television, "are you guys really watching this horrible shit? She says, as if she clearly doesn't care that Shauna was on top of you minutes ago

She rolls her eyes and looks at you "Look, this is the plan, you're going to hold that cupcake and I'm going to hold the cake" she says pulling you out of the Shauna side "Jeff is going to be so jealous" Jackie takes your hands and jumps, trying to make you get excited like her "He'll be jealous of anyone who can't see this" Shauna says as she dramatically throws herself onto her pillow

" Shipman!"

#danisbrainrot #okay i hate this... #yellowjackets #shauna shipman #yellowjackets x reader #shauna yellowjackets #shauna shipman x reader #yellowjackets imagine #yellowjackets fanfic #yellowjackets smut

[queen-of-the-avengers]

Reality Sinks In

Pairing: Mafia!Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader

Word Count: ~2.7k

Warnings: relationship angst, fluff

Summary: You and Bucky get a taste of normalcy in Italy where he goes to work and you spend his money. He will do anything to see you smile but he's quickly reminded of the fact that your smile can be easily taken away.

Between Love and Hate Masterlist

Squares Filled: always (2023) for @buckybarnesbingo

Author’s Note: any and all comments are appreciated <3

x

Then

After that conversation with Bucky, you became more suspicious about what he did for work. There was only one way you were going to get answers and that was if you got them yourself. You hated doing this to Bucky because you loved him so much. You should have trusted him if he said there was nothing to worry about, but there was something nagging at you in the back of your mind.

Something wasn’t right.

You took one of your old Air Tags and placed it inside his trunk underneath his gym bag. Wherever he went, you’d know about it. Bucky allowed you to stay inside his mansion while he left for business knowing there were guards here to make sure you don’t go in places you weren't supposed to go in. 

You pulled up the app for the Air Tag inside his car to see he was already on the move. You grabbed your purse and headed out. You order an Uber and put in a random address just so the driver would have something concrete to charge you with. When he got there, you hopped into the front seat.

“I know this isn’t customary but I need you to follow this Air Tag, please. I’ll pay you two hundred bucks,” you said and showed him the money so he knew you had it.

“Done,” he shrugged.

You placed your phone on his hook so he could see Bucky’s movement. The map took you all the way to the other side of town. The only thing on this side of town was an old warehouse. Why was Bucky here? The driver pulled up to the warehouse and you got out of the car.

“If you wait here, I’ll tip you an extra hundred. I’ll be right back.”

“You got it.”

Bucky’s sleek black Maserati was outside with three other Range Rovers that Bucky’s men drove. You snuck inside the warehouse and immediately heard screaming coming from upstairs. You slowly walked up the stairs in fear that you might be caught if you made too much noise. On the second story, you approached a room that didn’t have a door. Whatever this room was, the door had been smashed to pieces either from vandalism or by homeless people.

“Are you going to tell me what I want to know?”

That was Bucky’s voice. What the hell was he doing here? You peeked your head through the open doorway and saw a man tied to a chair in the middle of the room. His face had cuts and bruises, blood soaked his clothes, and one of his eyes was swollen shut. Bucky’s men stood around the man with guns while Bucky was right in front of him with his sleeves rolled to his elbows.

“I swear, I don’t know anything, man.”

“You want to know what I do to people who lie to me?”

Bucky pulled his fist back and punched the guyy so hard that you heard his bone crack under the pressure. You put your hand to your mouth as tears came to your eyes. This wasn’t the Bucky you knew. Bucky was kind and loving, not brutal and dangerous.

“Tell me who your boss is and I’ll make your death quick and painless,” Bucky ordered. The man refused to give Bucky what he wanted, and Bucky didn’t have time for this. “I got a girl waiting for me at home who I’d rather be with. Don’t keep me waiting.”

When the man didn’t answer, Bucky took out his gun and aimed it at the man’s head. The man started crying in fear but Bucky spared him no mercy. He shot him twice in the head. You jumped back from the impact and let out a startling cry. Bucky and his men turned toward the sound, and Bucky locked eyes with you.

“Shit, Y/N!”

You didn’t hear him because you were already running away from him. The Uber you ordered was still down there like you asked him to, and you hopped back into the car and wiped your tears.

“Just take me back home.”

“Are you okay?”

“I need you to step on it.”

You wanted to get back to his mansion before Bucky did. When you did, you threw the money at the man, thanked him, and sprinted toward the house. You packed whatever you could with the hope that you’d be out of the house before Bucky came back, but luck wasn’t on your side.

“Y/N, please, wait--”

“Get away from me! Don’t come near me!”

“This is exactly why I didn’t want to tell you what I did.”

You turned to him with tears rolling down your cheeks.

“You’re a murderer! My parents are Christians. Imagine what they’d think of you!”

Bucky stood up straight and hardened his look.

“You knew what you were signing up for the second you gave your body to me.”

“God, being in a relationship isn’t meant to be this exhausting! I can’t keep waiting around for you to come home, what secrets you want to keep from me, and if I’ll get in trouble for going into your damn office! You’re hurting people, Bucky!”

“This is the life. Take it or leave it.”

Bucky left your room but you didn’t think twice about what to do next. You finished packing and left his house with the intention of never returning again.

Now

You’re about to leave for Italy when you decide to double-check your list just to make sure you have everything. Clothes, makeup, hair products, hair curler, bathroom stuff, pajamas, etc. You walk by the front door and notice a brown box outside on the porch. Weird. There isn’t a note or anything on the outside but your name is written in beautiful script writing.

You take the box inside and open it without thinking it could be dangerous. Inside is a note and the beautiful dress you and Gio made together.

The dress was made for you. You should have it. - Gio

Oh, Gio. You quickly put the dress in your suitcase before Bucky comes down. You toss the boxes next to the ones you got from Amazon hoping he’ll think it’s from Amazon. Your mouth goes dry at the sight of Bucky in a three-piece suit. It makes you want to rip it off him and take him back upstairs.

“You’re staring,” he smirks.

“You’re very hard not to stare at.”

“Are you ready?”

“Yeah.”

Bucky takes the suitcases to the car while you pull out your phone to text Gio. You feel bad for bailing on his college party but how can you resist Bucky’s offer to Italy? You don’t Gio to feel like he’s second best, so you come up with a little lie about why you can’t go to the party.

You: Hey, Gio! I feel so bad about this but an emergency came up, and I won’t be able to make it to the party this weekend. Gio: Hey, no worries! Maybe we can hang out after? You: Yeah, I’d like that. Maybe when I get back in town.

“You ready?”

“Yeah, coming.” Bucky drives you to the airport where his personal jet is waiting. “Wow, I’ve never been on a private jet before.”

“You can have all this and more,” Bucky grins. Sam takes the suitcases and brings them to the jet. “Any weekend, anywhere in the world. You name it, you’re there.”

“You’re making all this go to my head,” you blush. “Before you know it, you’ll be taking me all around the world every weekend.”

“I hope you use it that way.”

He escorts you into the jet while Sam and Steve get it ready for takeoff. Once they join you inside, the pilot taqkes off. One of the female flight attendants brings over a flute of champagne, and you take it with a smile.

“Thank you.” You turn to Bucky who is right across the small aisle. “So, why are you going to Italy?”

“I need to take care of some business.” At the word “business” your smile falters. “Before you overthink this, I’m going to negotiate terms on opening a branch in Italy. I’m meeting with the owner of the building I want to buy.”

“Okay, okay,” you chuckle nervously. “I’m assuming this meeting isn’t going to take all week so what else do you have planned?”

“Whatever you want.”

You hum in thought and smirk when a few ideas come to mind.

“Dinner overlooking the Eternal City?”

“Yes.”

“Shopping in Milan?”

“Only if you promise to spend a lot of money.”

“What if I wanted to stay in bed all day with you?”

“If you’re going to do that, you’re going to be naked the whole time,” he smirks. You blush darkly and look at Sam and Steve who have yet to look at you. “I once promised you the world. I’m just holding onto that promise.”

It’s not enough you took a private jet to Italy but Bucky had to get the most expensive room at the most expensive hotel in Italy. The room is covered in gold--golden and white walls, a beautiful California King bed on a platform, a big bathtub in the middle of the bedroom that can fit two people, a balcony overlooking the city and waters below, and a full kitchen. This place is more expensive than you made in an entire year.

“Wow, this room is beautiful.”

“Listen, I made the meeting first thing so we could have the rest of the week together. I gotta go. Sam and Steve are in the next room if you need them or if you want to go somewhere. I will be back in time to take you to dinner.”

“Okay,” you smile.

Bucky grabs the sides of your face and kisses you deeply. Bucky leaves before he’s tempted to take you to bed, and you admire the room some more. You’re in fucking Italy! Of course, you’re going to go shopping here. The bathroom is as big as your bedroom back home. This is all so surreal. This is nothing like what you had growing up.

You spend two hours inside the bathroom pampering yourself before getting dressed in a light blue flowing dress that goes past your knees and a pair of cute heels. Steve and Sam escorted you to the nearest mall where you immediately fell in love with the stores available. You have Bucky’s shiny black Amex card in your purse that’s begging you to use it, and who are you to deny that?

Shirts, shoes, makeup, pants, dresses, lingerie, perfume, and more are in bags that Steve and Sam are carrying for you. All things you don’t really need but want. You might be buying all this knowing Bucky is seeing all the transactions on his bank app, and that is giving you motivation to buy more. You just bought a Louis Vitton purse and Christian Louboutin shoes when your phone rings.

“Yes, may I help you?” you answer Bucky’s call.

“I see you’re quite the spender today.”

“Well, you’re not here to make me feel better. This is the next best thing.”

“I can’t wait to see what you bought. I’ll need you to try them all on for me.”

“Oh, I will. Don’t worry, I got something for you.”

“I already have everything I want. You.”

Bucky sure does know how to make you blush like a schoolgirl.

“You know how to make a girl swoon.”

‘I know how to do more than that,” he smirks.

“Don’t you have a meeting to get back to?”

Bucky chuckles. “See you tonight, Doll.”

After spending another hour shopping, you felt bad for Steve and Sam who carried all of your bags. When you get back to the hotel, you take the extra two hours to get ready. You decide to wear the dress you and Gio made since you’re proud of the design and love how it looks on you. To match the dress, you wear your new Louboutins that are sleek black like Bucky’s card. You step out of the elevator onto the floor where the lobby is. Bucky is waiting with Steve and Sam with his back to you. Sam’s eyes meet yours causing Bucky to turn to see what his trusted friend is looking at. Bucky’s eyes go slightly wide, his mouth drops open a bit, and his pupils dilate because he’s in love with what he sees.

“Wow, you’re just stunning,” Bucky smiles.

“You clean up nice,” you blush.

Bucky takes you to La Pergola, one of the most expensive restaurants in Italy overlooking the Eternal City just like you wanted. Bucky must know the owner because he takes you to the balcony where there are no other people. You should have known he’d buy out the entire section just so you could eat by yourselves. The waiter brings out the wine menu which you take to look over.

“Where did you get that dress?” Bucky asks. “It’s beautiful.”

“Thank you. I made it in class with my partner. He let me have it.”

“He?”

“Yeah, Gio. The guy you met at lunch last week.”

Bucky’s eyes narrow. “When did he give it to you?”

“I found a box on the front porch before we left.” There’s something dark and dangerous about the look in Bucky’s eyes. “No, please don’t do this. Not here. Not now.”

“Fine,” he nods after a moment.

Bucky will let it go for now but he will definitely be upping security. No one would have been able to leave a box on the front porch without him knowing.

“So, you made this dress?”

“Yeah. I want to make my own clothes and have my own brand. I’d love to see millions of people wear my clothes.”

“I bet you’d be able to showcase your work in Milan during fashion week.”

“I wish,” you smile. “Maybe one day.”

Since the chef also knows Bucky, he gives a discount on the meal even though Bucky asks to pay full price for everything. Bucky ordered the seafood platter while you got the steak and lobster. Both meals were absolutely delicious, especially the chocolate lava cake. Since Bucky didn’t pay full price for the meal, he tipped three hundred dollars extra. You’re not used to such luxury but Bucky isn’t shy when it comes to money.

Afterward, you and Bucky decide to walk around the Po River that flows through Italy. The lights alongside the river make the night glow with the light of a thousand fairies. It’s all so romantic. Bucky knows Steve and Sam are following loosely behind you two but he ignores them since the most important person right now is you.

“What are you thinking?” Bucky asks.

“How I wish every day could be like this.”

“It can.”

No, it can’t. Not as long as Bucky does what he does for work. There are plenty of people who would see past the murder but how can you? You love life and you think everyone should value their life. Bucky takes it away like it’s nothing. You don’t want to ruin the moment so you don’t say anything about it.

You two stop at a small clearing that overlooks the river, and Bucky pulls you close by your hips. He slides his hand into your hair and holds you steady before kissing you. He makes you feel so alive. He makes you feel like you’re the only woman in the world. Why are you so conflicted about this? Why can’t you seem to be okay with this dangerous part of him?

Bucky pulls away from you and notices something behind you. He sees two men standing across the river in black suits with the faint outline of guns strapped to their sides. 

“What is it?” you ask.

“Nothing. It’s time to go back to the hotel room.”

Bucky pulls you away gently, but you look behind you to see the two men.

“Who are those men?”

“No one.”

“Then why are you rushing me out of here?”

“Y/N, come on. We need to go.”

You stop walking and yank your arm out of his grasp.

“No, who are those men? What is going on?”

“Doll, I have a lot of enemies here. I’d rather not let them see you.”

That’s why you can’t let it go. That’s what breaks your heart. It doesn’t matter where Bucky goes, you two can never be normal. You allowed yourself to get caught up in this moment but reality stings when it sets in.

It hurts to love Bucky. It’s making you bleed, and you don’t know how much blood you have left to give.

x

Follow my library blog @aqueenslibrary​​​​​​ where I reblog all my stories, so you can put notifications on there without the extra stuff :)

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes angst #marvel #marvel fanfic #marvel fan fic #marvel fan fiction #mcu #marvel fluff #marvel fanfiction #mcu fanfiction #marvel fiction #marvel fic

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA (30f) for losing my cool/snapping at my roommate and friend (30m, who I will call Kyle) because he was too loud playing games online with his friends?

For context, in case it's needed: this happened a couple months ago, but it's been on my mind. We are both autistic and thus got a late start in our adult lives, in several ways. We have been friends for 10 years and have lived together for roughly 7 of them, on and off (we adopted 2 cats together many years ago, its just easier like this so we dont have to separate them or force one of us to be away from the cats. we love them very much. kind of a coparenting situation lol). Kyle has a salaried tech job that's remote for 70% of the time, and I've recently become a full-time online college student after failing to "make it" without a degree.

We live in a tiny 2-bedroom house that Kyle's family owns. We're only charged for utilities, which is why neither of us are leaving anytime soon (contrary to what you might assume, Kyle does not make a lot of money), especially since it's giving me the opportunity to go to school full-time and not worry about rent. Kyle helps me a lot with groceries and other necessities and I do most of the chores.

So we are always basically on top of each other, and sometimes we get on each other's nerves. We try to be respectful of each others' space, but it's hard because there is not much space in the first place.

I had a really busy day studying and doing homework, which is basically every day for me, since I'm taking 6 classes, 4 of which are STEM classes. So I tend to fall asleep early if I'm not unintentionally pulling all-nighters. I was trying to sleep when this happened around 9pm.

He usually closes his door because he knows he can be very loud, but it doesn't help much. I ended up having to close my own door to try and drown out some of his yelling and laughing, which I understand is going to happen and I try not to hold it against him.

But then he opened his door and left it wide open, so I could hear everything, like he was in the same room. Something really funny must have happened because he started scream-laughing.

Despite this being a semi-regular weekly occurrence, I was really startled. I figured, it probably wasn't intentional and he'll try to quiet down and close his door. I tried to relax and as soon as I started to fall asleep, he did it again, except louder.

This time he didn't stop, he was full-on screaming and yelling at the top of his lungs. Kinda like those game streamers/youtubers where literally all they do is scream the whole time? Very similar. My cat, who was asleep under the blanket on top of me, got startled awake and scratched the shit out of my leg.

I think this all triggered a "fight" response because I was suddenly just so incredibly pissed at Kyle, which I tried to get under control, but he would not stop screaming and I literally could not hear myself think.

(I cannot wear earplugs or have anything in/covering my ears for huge sensory reasons.)

Then my cat wanted to leave the room to see what the commotion was, so I had to open the door, which gave me a direct line of sight to to Kyle at his computer.

I walked over to his doorway. Tried to knock and call his name, but he didnt notice with his noise cancelling headphones on. So I slammed my hand against his door to get his attention & yelled "Hey! Shut the fuck up, Kyle!"

He looked surprised to see me and laughed and kinds waved it off and said "sorry, it got a little intense" and he started to explain what they were doing.

I cut him off and said "I don't care. Shut the hell up." He said he could close his door again, and I said "No, you need to stop. Just stop! You're freaking the cats out too!" and I pointed to my leg with huge bloody scratch marks, shut his door, went back to my room, shut my own door. And of course after that I had adrenaline coursing through my body and I couldn't fall asleep anyway.

After that, I didnt hear a single sound from his room apart from an occasional quiet laugh. I started to feel guilty. I think I overreacted and ruined his fun. I know this is his way of blowing off steam halfway through the work week.

I also felt embarrassed because his friends probably heard me throwing a fit. We have lived with them before, and they're exactly that loud every single night. I have had to ask them to quiet down multiple times, and Kyle told me later on that gave them the impression that I'm. Well, "neurotic, controlling bitch" was heavily implied. Kyle is usually a lot more chill, but being around these guys influences him to act more like them.

But, I guess being loud while having fun isn't a crime, especially when it's not even 10pm yet. I feel like I proved his friends right, maybe.

The next morning I apologized, he apologized too, and everything seems to be good between us, but it's been a while and he's a lot quieter during game night now. He's such a reserved and stressed out person, he hardly ever laughs except when he's playing games, so I feel like I destroyed an important outlet.

I told another friend what happened and she said I didn't overreact at all and she would have flipped out way sooner if her husband did that. (Not sure it's comparable I mean we aren't married lol) And for the record, this friend and her husband were once part of a now-fractured friend group including Kyle and his game night friends, but grew apart, for a lot of reasons, but I think mainly because the Loud Gamer Friends never really grew up while everyone else matured and moved on to different phases in life.

Basically my friends current impression of Kyle is that he is a decent person but incredibly emotionally stunted and feels like he may unintentionally cope in ways that often hurt me without caring as much as she thinks he should. Which....feels partially accurate, I guess. But isn't that placing too much responsibility on him for my wellbeing? He does a lot for me, so it felt like an unfair thing to say.

My mom on the other hand, seems to fully think I am an asshole fun-ruiner. She thinks I should have tried harder to calm down. Maybe I should have approached him sooner - nicely.

And I agree. He probably would have tried his best to oblige even if he couldn't fully succeed. But that's the reason I didn't bother - in the past he has only been able to honor that kind of request for maybe 10-15 minutes, then forgets, and it's exhausting to keep reminding him.

Anyway... what does everyone here think?

#aita #am i the asshole

[sawyerslvt]

His Pretty Girl | Johnny Slaughter (TCM)

Summary: You and Johnny spend some alone time together at the slaughterhouse while the whole family is away. You get to have both sweet, fluffy moments but also rough sex :) Word Count: 3,584 Warnings: MDNI, smut, sex, fluffy Johnny, overstimulation, age gap

‘There you go… just like that pretty girl’

His rough and calloused hands travel the sides of your waist as you unbutton your blouse. You're surprised by the soft and gentle touch he’s able to provide, considering the state of his hands. Cuts and scars scattered all around, covering his big hands. 

You don't break his eye contact as you slowly reveal your plump breasts, button for button, making him hitch his breath in anticipation. His eyes are glued to you as you slowly undress yourself. They travel all over. From your eyes, to your breast, your waist, your swollen lips… oh, especially those lips. Johnny can never get enough of your lips. He had spent a long time sucking on them earlier, but he could never get enough. Kissing has never been as good as it is with Johnny. He takes his time, it's not something he does in passing. Kissing has its own full sessions, deep, wet, sloppy and passionate. It never fails to leave you in a pool of your soaking wetness. Your pussy begging to be filled with his thick and experienced fingers.

You make sure to make slow work of your undressing. This part was usually something Johnny would take care of but he’s letting you go at your own pace. The patience the man has managed to build with a woman like you is unbelievable. The way he snaps and barks at any- one or thing, no one would ever believe you if you told them how smitten he is, when the topic is you. Still you see the pain behind his eyes as he clenches his hands around your waist trying to keep his cool. This slow shit you’re pulling has got to be the cruelest form of torture that this slaughterhouse has seen. And that says a lot considering this was the slaughterhouse belonging to the Slaughter family. 

‘you’re killing me darlin, please pretty baby. let me do it’ You smile. An annoyingly, adorable smug expression that tugs at Johnny’s heartstrings. God, you're too much, you're lucky he’s managed to build that patience with you, but lord knows, it's about to crumble down with the way you are looking at him right now. 

‘mmh mmh’ You shake your head as you deny his request. You don't finish unbuttoning all the way, just enough to have your soft upper breast be visible, enough to drive any man wild. You get close to his face, conning him into thinking you're gonna crash your lips into his, but instead you place your small and delicate hands on his hard chest and push him down on the worn down mattress. Your breast recoils as you land on top of him, while his back crashes into the soft surface below you. His hands are quick to find their way to your ass, cupping it as your barely clothed body lay over his bare torso. You let out something between a giggle and a moan. Johnny bucks his hips under you, making you aware of his growing erection under his tight jeans. 

‘you feel that my love? Do you understand what you do to me huh? Let me see…’ He glances at the blouse you're wearing. ‘take this off for me and i’ll take care of the rest little one.’ His voice is that low and deep one you’ve learned means don’t fight me. That's the same tone he uses to carefully make you realize that your games are done for, and it's time to listen to your Johnny. 

‘uh… s-so i was thinking… that… m-maybe I could be in charge this time?’ Johnny smirks and raises an eyebrow at the lack of confidence in the voice of someone wanting to take charge. He lets out a small chuckle and you can't help but look down and blush at him making fun of you. ’How could I possibly resist that sweet face, doll?’ He moves around under you to get more comfortable, his cock trying desperately to pierce through the thick fabric to kiss your pussy with his tip. He places both his hands behind his head and gives you a cocky smirk. ‘Give it your best shot princess.’

You didn't expect him to fold so easily. That's all you had to do? To ask? Not that you had any complaints regarding how he dealt with you before but sometimes it's nice to feel like you're in control. You shuffle around in his crotch, digging your aching pussy deeper into his big bulge. You make sure to drag your hands over his chest as you slowly make your way closer to his face. This time, actually placing your soft lips on his. You moan slightly as you come in contact with his lips, he grunts as a response. The man was a natural, you've never met someone that had the rhythm Johnny possessed. He’s truly one of a kind. You cup his face with both hands as you deepen the kiss. It's already so desperate and you haven't even gotten started yet. 

You break the kiss to unbutton your blouse the rest of the way. This time, not in a slow fashion at all. You're suddenly impatient to feel Johnny's rough hands caress your bare skin. He knows you well enough to already have his hands touch and travel your belly and breasts before you even finish taking the blouse off. Once it's off, his hands find their way to your bra clasp and in one swift motion, it unclips and your breasts jiggle as they get let loose. He lets out a low and desperate grunt at the view presented to him, you sitting on his now pulsing and aching cock, topless, and ready to be fucked dumb. 

You swing your leg over and get off his crotch and sit with your hands laid on your knees. He watches you curiously and honestly… you've never really been in charge before, you're not sure what to do next. Johnny goes from having his hands behind his head, to now leaning on his elbows. He gets that you've already hit a fat wall at the ‘taking charge’ thing you made a fuss about. He gives you a quick nod of the head, pointing at his bulge. A quiet ‘oh’ escapes your lips at the realization. You smile to yourself, a little embarrassed you couldn't figure that much out. 

You fidget with his zipper with your mouth slightly agape, preparing for his size. This is far from your first time doing this but somehow it suddenly feels like it. As soon as you manage to unzip and wiggle his beautifully tight wrangler jeans off his bulge, his cock springs out as if it was suffocating and finally comes up for air. You’ve been with Johnny for a long time now, he took a liking to you immediately and you got promoted from helpless victim- to plaything- to wife in the blink of an eye. You've seen his cock more times that you can count but it will forever shock you like it's the first time. It’s massive, you didn't even know they come in this size. You swear, you see his hard cock pulsing. His veins look like they're about to burst. You quickly bring both your hands to wrap around his girth like you're protecting him from exploding.

‘yes just like that darlin, you're doing so good.’ His voice is so smooth and it makes your hands automatically rub his length to make him praise you more, his pride for you is addictive. Up and down, slowly, up and down as you make sure to hold a fairly tight grip of his sensitive cock. You watch as you see the tight skin of his circumcised penis move with your hands. You stroke a finger over his tip and feel his pre-cum leaking out, wet and sticky for you.

You tap it and pull away to see it create a string of cum between your finger and his sore tip. ‘fuckkk.’ He lets his head fall behind him and as he does, you bring your lips to his swollen peak. He quickly brings his head back once he realizes what you've done. You suck to build pressure and then circle your tongue around his tip. Playing with it, teasing and tasting his cum. You let out a quiet moan before you let your lips sink deeper down his shaft. You hear him gasp as he positions himself to only lean on one elbow to use his other hand to grab the back of your head. His hand is so big, it almost engulfs your whole head as it follows the movement of your head. Up and down, as your mouth slowly fills with more and more saliva to lube it up and make it easier to slide. ‘fuckkk you're being such a good girl for me princess.’

He continues watching you with his head tilted, you look back at him with your glossy doe eyes, having gone a little too far down, making your eyes water. ‘my sweet angel, am I too much for you?’ You shake your head, with his cock still filling your entire mouth. You manage to let out a small ‘nuh uh’ to emphasize how you wouldn't have it any other way… though it just comes out as a moan anyways. ‘good, I wouldn't want to hurt that pretty little mouth of yours.’ 

Your pussy is so wet… too wet to not do something about it. And as you've been put in charge, you decide to do something about it. You slowly and tightly come off Johnny's massive tip, making a quiet pop sound as your lips disconnect. ‘don’t take this the wrong way, sweet thing.’ Johnny quickly gets up and before you know it, he has his hand wrapped around your throat, pinning you down on the mattress. He pushes your throat into it, making your whole body sink into the soft cushion. You're wearing a skirt with cute pink lace panties beneath. His big and toned body casts a dark shadow over you as he slides your panties down your legs.

He licks his fingers and brings them to slide between your folds, assessing how wet you are. You are very much ready for him. ‘you were doing such a good job little one.’ He pushes two fingers into your sore hole. ‘but you were taking too long. Now I might have to get disrespectful’ He slides in and out of you and you arch your back and gasp. ‘stay still for me.’ He increases his speed and forces his fingers harder into you. It was already difficult to stay still a second ago, now, it's impossible. You feel his hand tighten around your throat, a warning for disobeying his command. You use all your power to stay still and you miraculously manage to stay still. ‘thats my good girl. you like that?’ his voice is so deep, you feel yourself drowning in it. ‘y-yes… johnny… m-more.’ He smirks as he looks down at you. ‘you want more? what’s the magic word sweetheart?’ He has a massive grin but his eyes are narrowed, you wonder if his victims get that same expression, you can't help but feel a small wave of jealousy wash over you. ‘p-please Johnny. I want more of you.’

He lets go of your throat and pulls his fingers out of your pussy. He licks them clean as he looks you in the eyes. You’re breathless from just watching him, causing you to bite your lips. His dick is still wet from your saliva as it hangs outside of his jeans. They’re still partially on so he pulls them completely off, leaving him fully naked. It's the perfect time of evening for the sunset to find his scar scattered body through the windows and kiss his soft skin. It's like the gods did that just for you and you send a quick thank you prayer back for providing you this perfect view. He looks so majestic in the warm sunlight. His toned body creating shadows in every crease, making his abs stand out more, his chest and his V-line pointing to his erect cock, reminding you of why you're laying there in the first place. 

He starts stroking his dick, its making wonderful sloppy sounds as his hands use your saliva to rub himself. ‘you’re all mine, aren't you?’ He starts placing himself closer to you. He slides his soft and plump tip through your folds, and over your red and swollen clit. ‘yes johnny, I'm all yours.’ He puts more pressure over your clit with his tip, pushing harder and harder. ‘oh yeah?.’ His eyes are laser focusing on how your pussy lips unfold and open up for him and he pushes himself on your clit. 'I'm all yours.’ You repeat, god, you're so weak and impatient to feel him fill you up already. 

Without any warning he pushes his cock deep inside you. You let out a loud moan, bordering on a scream as you feel how his thick cock presses up on the walls surrounding it. Johnny's dick fits you like a glove, tighter even. You were already so wet but he’s so big that it's still difficult to adjust to his size. He stays still inside you and gets closer to you with his face, placing a gentle kiss on the side of your ribs. ‘are you my princess?’ He slowly makes his way up your body. He places another kiss on top of your breast. ‘my doll?’ Another one on your collar bone. ‘my pretty girl?’ and one last one on your lips. ‘my love?’

He starts moving around inside you. Slowly sliding in and out. It starts off very subtle but the wetter you get, the more drastic his movements get. He lets out the most wonderful groan as he feels how wet you get. ‘fuckkk, you're being such a good girl, you’re taking me so well.’ He’s now pounding into you, deep but careful. His movements getting more and more erratic as you clenching around his cock is too much for him to stay gentle, which he had originally planned. Loving, gentle and passionate sex is something he cherishes a lot, especially and only with you. But the ‘Johnny’ in him loves it rough, disrespectful and intense. He pulls out briefly to place your knees over his shoulders. He gives you a quick peck on the lips as a pre-apology for how he’s gonna destroy your pussy in the coming minutes. 

He pushes his length back in and lets out a loud and animalistic grunt. This time he doesn't bother starting gently. He looks into your eyes and it's the pure hunger of a hunter. He’s the wolf and you're the helpless little bunny being in the wrong place at the wrong time, except you’re far from in the ‘wrong place’. You couldn't dream of being in a more right place. He’s drilling into you, hard and deep. It's so intense, you feel how his balls slap your ass with every deep thrust and the tip of his cock piercing your womb with every push. You feel so full of him, your heart, body, mind and soul is so full of him. You can hardly call them yours. You mean it when you say that you belong to Johnny. You really do, and you forever will. 

You moan and gasp with every thrust. The deeper pounds deserving of loud screams. Johnny does the same. His deep voice producing the sexiest noises a man could possibly make. His groans and grunts sound even better, knowing that they’re for your ears only. And that you're the one causing them. You're lucky the whole family is away and that the slaughterhouse is located in the middle of nowhere. You're convinced your screams could be heard from miles away.

‘i know baby, i know.’ But he makes no attempt at slowing down. ‘fucckk darlin. the things you do to me.’ He gets close to your face and gives you a sloppy kiss. His tongue explores the inside of your mouth and you can hardly kiss him back. Only being able to give him whines.

‘j-johnny… i-m gonna c-cum pl-please.’ You feel how you’ve been fucked all the way dumb, you can barely speak and your ability to think was gone long ago. ‘hold it for me pretty girl, just a little longer.’ He speaks with such sweetness, you wouldn't think he was inside of you, rearranging your guts, almost killing you with the force of every thrust he pushes into you. 

It's impossible to ask that of you, to ‘hold it a little while longer’. You cum on his cock but you try hiding it behind your expression and suppress your moans as much as you can.

‘did you cum?’ Johnny immediately knows and you wonder if he's a wizard. ‘...no.’ You lie, decently convincing if you say so yourself. ‘silly girl, I feel how you’re pulsating and clenching around my cock right now.’ He stays still inside you but is looking deep in your eyes waiting for a response. ‘i-i’m sorry johnny. I couldn't do it.’ You look up at him with the biggest and sweetest puppy eyes you can possibly give. They usually work… usually. By the look he’s giving you right now, you know this isn't one of those usual times. 

‘of course you could do it, if you needed help, you should've told me. what have I said about us using our words?’ His voice is so deep and masculine, it makes your whole body shiver to be on the receiving end of his scolding. ‘i-i know johnny, im s-sorry.’ Your voice is weak, partially because of how he’s scolding you, and partially cause he’s fully fucked your brains out so that your whole body is just jelly. ‘that's not enough sweet thing. I'm gonna have to teach you a thing or two.’ 

He shoves his dick back into your pussy and the overstimulation feels like it could actually kill you. You just came and everything is sore and sensitive. From your walls, to your clit, your entire hole. Your poor tight and abused little pussy. It's too much. ‘j-johnny!!!’ You scream as loud as you can with the limited amount of oxygen in your lungs. ‘shhh my love, it’s almost over. Remember this feeling next time you try being slick.’ He somehow increases his speed and force, you thought he was already at his peak but the man is a tank, there is always more to come. ‘fucckkk princess, you want me to cum in this tight little pussy? hmm?’ He’s breathless from fucking you so hard. ‘do you sweetheart?’ You can tell he’s only seconds away, and fuck, you can’t wait. ‘y-yes johnny. please cum inside me.’ Right as you finish your sentence, you feel his hot cum fill you up. It shoots far and deep inside of you. His pretty and white cum mixing with yours and spilling out of your abused cunt.

You shake and flinch as he pulls out. Johnny takes notice of your sudden movements and brings his right hand to cup your face, making a U shape with his hand. ‘my sweet angel… did mean ol’ johnny go to far?’ He has a sweet but mocking tone in his voice. You slowly nod your head… he didn't go too far, he could never. He’s insanely good at reading you but you would be a liar if you said it wasn't intense and overstimulating. ‘come here sweetheart. Show me where it hurts and I'll make it go away.’ He grabs your hand and singles out your index finger to hold it in front of you. You bring your hand to your pussy to point at it. He chuckles and you see his dick jerk a little. ‘alright pretty girl.’ 

He spreads your legs and places his face between them. You gasp and you fear what he’s about to do next. He's actually gonna be the death of you. Tonight, right now, right here. You flinch when you feel cool air being blown on your wet cunt. He’s blowing at the entire area around your abused pussy and as much as it feels different, there is actually a very relieving feeling. Your Johnny always knows how to make everything better. He spreads your lips and continues blowing. It feels way cooler and more intense this way. This time, you also feel it on your clit, everything cooling down and a big wave of relief hits you. Before he comes back up, he gives your pussy a little kiss as a sorry for what he put her through. If she could talk, all she would say is thank you, for everything, all of it. 

He comes back up and gives you a kiss on the forehead. 'Better?' He asks curiously. 'Better.' You answer confidently. He lays down next to you and pulls you in for a hug. He holds you in his big embrace. His arms, big and strong, not a thing in the world could hurt you when Johnny is around. You love him so much it hurts. He gives you more kisses, covering your forehead as he holds you, letting his hands travel all over your body. You feel whole… safe and loved as you drift into a deep sleep in Johnny’s arms. 

♡link♡

credit for dividers: @anitalenia @v6que <3

#tcm #texas chainsaw game #texas chainsaw massacre #texas chainsaw massacre game #ff #writing #fanfiction #johnny #johnny slaughter #johnny sawyer #johnny tcm #smut #fem reader #johnny smut #johnny slaughter smut #johnny slaughter x reader #fluff #romance #x reader #tcm game #leatherface #bubba #bubba sawyer

[britts-galaxy-brain]

The police don’t get involved for internet related stuff most of the time, but what Lily did to Sunny, Courtney, and many others is well beyond her already very filled record of internet stuff. Could it be possible to get charges on Lily surrounding that?

Sunny still falls under "internet stuff" in the eyes of law enforcement, and Courtney's experiences happened so long ago that the only thing close to evidence he could realistically get would be a therapist confirming that she has trauma relating to CSA. And even that is more abstract than hard physical proof so that's still a gamble.

Lily is on the same level as people like Onision. It took years, a ton of public exposure, and Chris Hansen himself stepping in before anyone took any of the disgusting shit Onision did seriously. And yet he's still not in prison.

Hypnotist Sappho is another example. She has proudly declared she's a zoophile, proudly displays her nauseating "relationships" with young teenagers (the audio I've heard will make you want to scrub your skin off to feel clean again), she tried to set up an entire nonprofit "zoophile rights" organization, and she has websites that openly tell people how to hide illegal material. She's been reported to authorities numerous times. Still not in prison.

Kero the Wolf has a ton of chats, audio, video, and public forum posts detailing the unspeakably horrific things he's done to animals. He's a proud zoosadist beyond a shadow of a doubt. He was actually investigated by authorities. Still somehow not in prison and he's still online today smugly talking about how he's starting a new chapter and every PROVEN accusation against him is a baseless hate campaign.

People get away with far, far more disgusting shit than it seems a lot of people learning about Lily realize. Law enforcement is not obligated to give a shit. Law enforcement is not obligated to actually enforce anything, regardless of whether there's undeniable evidence shoved in their faces.

#lily orchard #lily orchard is a predator

[leavingsunsets]

because im bored and going insane, have a little drabble because im going insane. ALSO THIS IS KINDA A CRACKFIC???? you and alastor be silly together. does a cutoff 'kys' count as a warning?

"𝔅𝔬𝔬𝔪 𝔅𝔬𝔬𝔪 𝔓𝔬𝔴."

[𝖠𝗅𝖺𝗌𝗍𝗈𝗋 & 𝗀𝗇!𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋]

"I'm back!"

The slam of the hotel doors echo throughout the lobby, an empty one. To which you only notice after a few steps in, swinging the one plastic bags branded '8-11' in your one hand.

"Uh, Husk, where'd all the others go?" You call out, putting them down on the coffee table. "Husk?"

No response. It's also now that you notice the bar was empty. Huh. Where did everyone go?

...

They went out for another redemption activity or something?

(This was the time Cherri took them out to the club. They're out there being judged by the holy court while you were busy sneaking out to raid the convenience store.)

"Gah, whatever. More for me."

You scoop up the bags and bring 'em over to the kitchen, where your chef (the microwave) awaited. Unaware of the red creeping figure by the second floor balcony.

Now, with your multitude of food splayed on the kitchen island, you tap your fingers over each one of them.

"Hmm. A burger or mac' n' cheese... Hmm."

With a shrug, you pop both open and throw it in the microwave, the radiation machine whirring to life as you lean back.

The peace is only broken once a sudden buzz of radio fills the silence.

"Wow. What is this?"

You nearly land on your own ass at his presence, head snapping to look behind you. "!?! WHAT THE HELL?!"

The sight of Alastor happily humming as he rummages through your other bag is what greets you, much to your horror.

"The f- Don't touch that!" you hurriedly snatch the bag away from him, hugging the bulky thing to your chest. "Why're you even here?? I thought you were gone with the others!"

"Eh, some Cherri girl, and a hefty pay," he shrugs, leaning on his cane. "What's that you're heating?"

Putting aside your bag, you squint your eyes at him for a moment. "My dinner."

He stares, raising a brow, "..which is?"

"Mac n' cheese," you grumble, already expecting some kind of reaction from the Louisianian.

"Eugh," yup, there it is, "you call that dinner? Goodness." You sigh, crossing your arms and facing the microwave once more. You weren't in the mood for some kinda wit war with this guy right now.

"Hmph. Back to the search." With a snap, he teleports your bag back to him, already digging through it before you can protest.

"HEY!" you reach out to snatch it back again, only for him to swerve it away. He daintily brings out a blue and red pin between his pointed fingers. Your eyes go wide at it.

"Who's this clown-" he disintegrates right as you lunge across the counter. Reappearing after you land face first on the floor, he continues, "this is the first time I've seen a neon jester of all things."

Face scarlet, you quickly get up and attempt to grab at him. But of course, what was Alastor if not a little shit, rendering your efforts useless. He disintegrates into the floor just as you reach out, teleporting to the other side of the kitchen island.

"Wow! You have 10 of these!" at this point, he was just pulling out the contents, splaying them on the counter.

"ALASTOR! I AM GOING TO SKIN YOU ALIVE I SWEAR TO-" The words die on your tongue the moment you spot him slide out a neatly sealed envelope, decorated with stickers.

At this moment, you seem to lose all sense of fear, or maybe some sort of sensibility to ground you back in reality. As at this moment, you find yourself charging at the demon 100 kilometers per hour, body ready to take any damage if it meant to stop him from even glimpsing at who the recipient was.

Unfortunately, he already did.

"Oho! To think you were a superfan! Of Fizzarolli nonethele-"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-!"

The microwave beeped in a little musical tune, however, it went unheard as you were busy having a important civilized conversation with the distinguished gentleman with you right now.

He dodges, sadly, disappearing into thin air once more. You basically crash against the counter, upper body smacked against the countertop.

"Ooh, 'Dear, Fizzarolli, I'm your biggest fan! I just wanted to say-' "

Grabbing a pack of frozen croquettes, you fling it at his head, to which a black tentacle sprouts from the ground and smacks away.

You jab a finger at him, face red with humiliation, "YOU'RE AN ABOMINATION TO ORAL HYGIENE." The frozen package flies, knocking the microwave into its plug and jamming it into the socket. A spark.

Right at this moment, Emily hops up to join Charlie in this outcry against the cruel (bi)annual exorcism of heaven, Angel Dust takes a courageous stand against the walking volatile moth himself, and you?

You face your own heavy battle, to which you're not sure will end peacefully. Which is a little generous to say, as he just continues reading the letter despite your insult. You feel a vessel nearly pop at his dismissal.

" '-I started watching your shows just a few months after falling here and-' "

Another packaged burger comes flying at his head. "WHY CAN'T YOU JUST LEAVE ME ALONE, DAMNIT!" you screech, pissed.

"Hmm," for a second, he looks away contemplatively, tapping his chin. Then, it morphs into a smug smirk. "No. This is quite funny to me."

You grit your teeth tightly at his arrogance, veins about to pop, "This. Is why. Nobody. Likes you."

he leans over with a catlike smile, fluttering his lashes as he cutely lays against the kitchen island, kicking his feet slightly. "Awe yew mwad at mwee?"

Maybe it was just your temper, and his audacity, but at this point, you just explode.

"KILL YOURSE-"

And apparently, so did the microwave.

The first thing you feel is the machine's nuclear explosion just to your right, and the splatter of something gooey on your head. You blink.

The mac' n' cheese. You forgot about that.

Alastor remains unfazed and untouched, still lain across the counter and kicking his feet. Red eyes lazily glance at the absolutely blackened charr of a lump in the place of a perfectly functional microwave. "Hmm. Wonder what we're gonna do about that."

You are gonna insane if you have to spend one more minute with this man without strangling him.

#sen writes ! #sunset prints ! #alastor #hazbin art #hazbin alastor #hazbin #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel alastor #alastor fanfiction #hazbin hotel fic #hazbin hotel fandom #hazbin hotel fanfiction #alastor hazbin hotel #alastor the radio demon #not an x reader #not x reader #alastors so sillyyyy #RAHHHH IM GOING INSANE NO RPOOFREAD #no beta we die like men #no beta we die like pentious #rawdogging like how nature intended

[formula-wind]

choose your agent! — valorant mains of furin high first years

※ headcanons for wind breaker characters as valorant players ft. sakura haruka, nirei akihiko, suo hayato, & sugishita kyotaro

Sakura Haruka — instalock duelist

Like with gang fights, he definitely had his fair share of experiences with cocky duelists so it’s no surprise he tries to take the main damage-dealer role first in his team when he queues for a game.

Reyna would be the first one Haruka tries to pick because of the agent’s self-sustaining nature. No need to rely on teammates for entry support or heals—relating well with his independent character.

I mean, Reyna’s blind wont affect his teammates so there’s no reason for them to yell at him for bad blind timings or wasting heals so less problems!

Though not that he would admit this, but he also thinks she’s the most useful agent for helping the team out.

No one is an initiator? Haruka entries site for the team with a blind, killing anyone there who stops his team from getting in.

No one is a sentinel? Haruka stays behind to guard their backs trying to stay alive for as long as possible to protect the spike (when attacking) or site (when defending).

No one is a controller? Well, he can’t really do much with Reyna’s abilities but he does hunt down enemies when he has ultimate available to reduce the team’s worries.

Definitely sets a good example for how Reyna mains should be.

He also just hates being in a team with Reyna players who talk shit more than get kills. Who doesn’t though?

Because of this, he does understand that instalocking Reyna would get his teammates assuming he’s one of the bad players but he couldn’t care less when they express their annoyance.

Haruka can and will prove them wrong, after all.

However, in extremely rare cases where people instalock duelists before him, he either dodges (95% of the time since he just wont be able to stand the possibility of egoistical teammates) or picks Chamber.

Why? He can stay behind guarding flank or site strongly as his “dumbass teammates” charge the enemies.

With his shooting skills, he can really makes the most out of Chamber’s abilities.

Also because of chamber’s pistol and rifle ultimate, he’s also able to buy a gun for a teammate if needed. Again, definitely not something he would admit, but if pointed out, best believe he’s going to scream in voice chat about how irresponsible his team is with credits.

Akihiko Nirei — sentinel or controller strategist

We all know how proactive he is with gathering information about guys he finds cool so I am pretty sure that when he gets really into Valorant he has a notebook full of strategy plans, setups, and lineups from his research and actual game experiences.

His analytical skills and game-knowledge would definitely make him the best supporting member of the team.

Nirei would be that person that waits for everyone to pick their agent before picking his to avoid complaints and to work with the team dynamic.

If a sentinel is needed, fits well with the team and the map; he would most likely select Killjoy.

He probably mastered a lot of swarm + alarm bot setups. Though, he does like using the same setups twice or more instead of switching it up if it works against the enemy.

Probably does it because he thinks the enemy wouldn’t expect such plans to be executed again (not really true most of the time).

Good thing about Nirei is he knows what he’s capable and not capable of; he understands his weaknesses so he plays it safe to not become a burden to his teammates.

Enemies call him a rat for being so skilled with his utility usage, and he takes it as a compliment with pride.

Loves playing post-plant lineups! He practices a lot in custom before each ranked game.

However, if his team needs a controller to block out sections of a site to secure entries, he’s playing Astra.

Now, Astra is probably one of the toughest agents to master since it needs good map awareness skills and team coordination so Nirei only picks her if he knows his team can give good comms and support (like if he would be playing with the other bofurin members).

He would definitely take pride in assisting his teammates with getting kills by using concuss (nova pulse) and pulling enemies (gravity well).

May get too focused with getting his abilities set up and activated right so he would need someone to watch his back (he has been trolled and stabbed multiple times, which sometimes led to really funny games).

Truly the teammate with the braincells we all need (and aspire to be).

Suo Hayato — duelist-like sentinel or full-on duelist

He is a Sage main. 100%. No doubt.

Oh but Hayato's not your stereotypical bottom frag “team before me” Sage main.

He’s the type that would carry the whole team—some would even say he’s one of those “selfish” Sage players.

Why she’s his first pick? Simple: fun walls.

He doesn’t really like walling off the spike since it doesn't provide good entertainment he knows his walls can be used for better uses.

He loves tormenting the enemy with crazy Sage wall placements, getting kills without the enemy knowing where they’re getting shot at brings him so much joy—it’s almost sadistic.

You think a wall is misplaced so bad it lets you enter the site easier? Wrong. Hayato's behind you getting your team one by one.

Sometimes he drags it out, watching the enemy team get past him when they don’t check their corners and follows them to the site—and if they’re attacking—he does the little ninja defuse trick; defusing the spike as soon as the other team has planted it.

With his healing orbs, he is still very supportive of his team and usually heals them first instead of himself, not really minding if they still die first after getting healed. He’s pretty confident with his shooting skills so he survives well without needing additional health stats.

He plays at a distance so even on low health he is able to get frags.

His slow orbs are also mainly there for its regular use of keeping enemies at bay, but also torment his team members if they’re getting on his nerves—which doesn’t happen often.

The reviving ultimate? If his team keeps asking to be revived best believe he’s only using it to use the revived bodies as a shield or revives them in the most inconvenient moment.

When given the chance to be a duelist, he is definitely picking Jett.

You really can’t convince me otherwise cause her swift play style suits well with Hayato's character.

Those updraft knife trick shots on tiktok? He does them at least once a game to bring down the enemy’s mental.

Would probably be like a Tenz with Jett’s ultimate. He would save the other abilities if he knows he has or is getting his ultimate soon to do those crazy killer dash moves.

This is pretty much self-explanatory so I don’t know what else to say. Hayato is graceful; Jett lets him prove it in game.

Sugishita Kyotaro — hunting-focused initiator

Probably not the most active player in Bofurin but when he does play, he’s playing Fade.

Is probably only ever playing fade because it fits the most with him though.

Short explanation: their auras match well; scary and will be out to torment you.

Long explanation: if he’s playing with Umemiya, he’s probably using Fade to provide support and keep the enemy as far from him as possible.

Since he also doesn’t talk much, Fade uncovering the location of enemies helps him be useful for his team without needing much interaction. I mean, the agent literally can direct you to enemies with the ultimate ability so what else is there to point out?

I also see him as a very proactive corner-checker so Fade’s haunt and prowler is really handy for him. No corner of the site is left unchecked with Kyotaro around!

However, I can’t really picture him using seize that much for capturing enemies so I think he doesn’t really purchase it. If they’re out in the open, he likes killing them head-on so he doesn’t see much value to the said skill.

Overall, even as a one-agent player, he definitely excels with making the most out of Fade’s abilities.

a/n: depending on whether or not anyone is actually interested in this i may turn this into a series,,

#track-side headcanons #the brainrot is crazy #i miss playing valorant #wind breaker headcanons #wind breaker au #wind breaker x reader #wind breaker #windbreaker x reader #wbk #wind breaker anime #windbreaker (satoru nii) #wind breaker (satoru nii) #wind breaker sakura #windbreaker sakura #haruka sakura #sakura haruka #wind breaker suo #windbreaker suo #suo hayato #suou hayato #wind breaker nirei #windbreaker nirei #nirei akihiko #wind breaker sugishita #windbreaker sugishita #kyotaro sugishita #sugishita kyotaro #valorant #valorant headcanons #valorant fanfiction

[crescentpaws]

now on the more chaotic side….

- fintan figured out how to make a clone of himself.

- they fought a magic duel and he LOST

- was getting annoyed at the clone tbh so i made fintan set him on fire repeatedly but that guy would Not die

(ft vespera just watching…..)

- umm i read that you have to order the clone to do something in order for it to despawn or whatever but by that point the clone was evil apparently so fintan wasn’t able to give it orders anymore???

so now he’s just listed as fintan’s brother?? help???? his name is Nelson. i will find a way to kill him one day i promise you that. fucking nelson pyren. fucker.

this is a cool picture tho. with the fire & the phoenix & everything.

- next are all my horrible attempts at trying to make fintante happen:

- my first plan of course was to use the infatuate spell. unfortunately i chose gisela for this mission and she is not very high leveled when it comes to magic so the spell backfired. and fintan ended up kissing her instead 💀 obviously i started freaking out and started spamming negative interactions to get the romance bar back down which led to them getting in a fist fight (which fintan won) but even though the bar is red now she’s still listed in the romance category for him 💀 going to just. ignore that.

- my second plan was to take what just happened and apply it to fintan instead (make HIM use the spell and then hope it backfires) but unfortunately he is a master rank spellcaster so his spells rarely fail… i got him up to a dangerously high level of spellcaster charge before trying the spell in hopes that it would fail but he’s too good….

- i ended up applying some curses to him as well to increase the chances of the spell backfiring but it only ended up making things worse for him 💀 accidentally gave him another curse which made this creepy asshole follow him around all night and prevented him from sleeping

- in another attempt he just straight up fucking died.

first grim reaper appearance haha… (his familiar actually ended up reviving him though… but it didn’t matter because i was just resetting from the same save point anyway.)

- at some point throughout all this fintan gained the fear of… swimming?? which is very random considering he has a pool in his yard that he’s swam in multiple times before… but ok

- the spell actually DID end up backfiring correctly but even when they kissed the romance bar never showed up 💀 which pissed me off because it showed up with gisela… homophobic ass spell

- ended up giving up on the spells and tried giving romantic gifts… which SEEMED to go well but it did not actually improve their relationship at all…

only game where your characters can be sworn enemies and still say shit like this about each other (the romance bar did not go up even a BIT. so this is really funny.)

- tried the potion of forced friendship next because i was curious to see what it would do… i thought it’d just make the interactions go smoother but apparently it puts the friendship bar up to max 💀 so. that part was solved i guess?? they’re no longer enemies at least…

- but of course them being them they somehow managed to get the bar back down to zero 💀 they basically had to start their relationship over from scratch…

- finally got them to kiss though (for real) so idgaf

- fintan loooves to randomly insult him though. so. idk how long this will last. the sentiments are already very conflicting

(funniest photo)

#kotlc #keeper of the lost cities #kotlc sims #fintante