#but is that the motivator? that he was depressed and didnt want to leave his family behind to survive without him???

[badgyalshii]

ITS NEVER OVER |||

+ (WHERE HAVE YOU GONE)

word count: 1.7?

Paul atreides x Reader (Always safe for POC + PLUS SIZE) Paul POV!!!

warnings: signs of depression? were happy in there tho, proof read? yeah something like that (god i am not good at these😭) y/n is not in this chapter but ofc shes mentioned entirely throughout the text.

A/N: AHHHHHH THE FINAL CHAPTER BEFORE THE FINALE, IM EXCITED TO POSTTTT, i hope you guys enjoyed and i love the feedback i recieved! i love you all, have a good day/night, whenever you get this! (Also, considering that this is from pauls POV i thought that i might add an extra title)

Hey! Have you read the first chapters? You didnt? What! Read it here!! I . II . III . IV.

Hmm? You said you like shii’z writing?! Omg me too! Check out her masterlist!

He let out a heavy breath before he ripped his mask off of his face. He wasn't supposed to be out alone considering he was the new crowned emperor. But he was, and he was searching for you and he wasn't gonna give up until he did. He wore heavy clothing to try and hide his identity from others, and a bag that slung around his shoulder consisting of his journal, water, and other things he might need. He settles for the night in a rock. A rock with a beautiful view. He has been on the road for so long, he's forgotten how long, he didn't really care to remember either, considering it would help motivate to find you. He walks around the rock, searching for anything to give him clues of you or if you might've been here.

As he looked around, It was clear that someone had been there before. He looked at the bad attempt of making a bed, but he didn't touch it. His eyes slightly closed from trying to study the bed, there were still prints of a body, maybe two, on the bed. He hunches over. There was a piece of hair, as disgusting as it sounds…he picked it up. It was the same as yours, he took a rather long pause before thinking, maybe he should smell the bed? No, what if he smells something he doesn't like. He shook his head before looking at the single strand of hair that was in his hand. He sat down on the bed, setting the hair gently aside before taking off his glove and putting the strand back in his palm. Everybody's hair could be similar, he thought. He let out a sigh before looking ahead of him. He didn't know what time it was, but all he knew was that he was tired and heart broken. He didn't miss his home, not at all, not with you not there.

He put his glove and his mask back on before placing the hair into his bag. Out of everything that was going on, at least the view was beautiful. He stood and walked to the view of the rock, carelessly taking footsteps before he sighed and dropped down, his legs open and his elbows on his knees as he took in the view. He let in a deep breath. ¨tired. I am tired¨ he let out in a whisper. He fought his sleep often because he knew it would make him less confident and he would grow to slack, but sometimes he just couldn't take it anymore. The yawns leaving his lips, difficulty holding onto the hooks that latched onto the sandworm, but he thought he could finally settle here for a while, as a reward for finding a piece of hair that have a 5 percent chance of being yours.

As he watched the view, he thought of you. He didn't cry as much anymore. When he cried, he cried alone in private. And during that time, he cried until he couldn't anymore. Every time he saw Irulan it made him sick to his stomach. As much as he wanted to blame her, he couldn't. His heart was too good and he knew better than to let a weak desperate moment turn into anger. ¨why did i offer?¨ he would think over and over, countless times, wondering how could he be so careless. But he wasn't, he didn't want to marry her for the reason of love, just wanted to keep her safe as a promise to the retired and overthrown emperor. Thinking about it made him question his character, who has he grown to be? hed remembered what you said, he always thought of the smart and wise things you had to say.

¨its okay to feel how you feel, paul¨ you looked at him with a pity smile on your face while your hand was on his cheek. He had another nightmare. He didn't want it to be true. ¨this is gonna make me go crazy, y/n¨ paul whispered back, leaning into y/ns touch. ¨don't let it fool you, don't let it phase you, don't let it change you¨ you replied. At times, all paul wanted to do was give up. He didnt wanna be the chosen one. It was all too much. He could stay here forever, with you. For all eternity if he could.

Paul sighs and looks to the side. Remembering what you said, he wished things weren't so quiet.he laughed to himself, all the dreams he had of the future, but none of you. He sat alone, all alone, not one book, not one sound, just him, by himself. He felt empty, he wants you, he needs you, he needed someone to make him feel complete again, but days spread thick and long, bored, fighting himself back and forth between hope for finding you and wondering if you had just moved on. He wished he had a dream of you, of your blue eyes glistening in the sun, of your laugh, He wished it was so vivid that he touched you, that he could control his dream and talk to you, make love to you, but he had nothing, nothing at all. Nothing to remember you by, just a stupid suspicious piece of hair, tears brimmed his eyes, he needs you. There was no one he could pray to if he was the chosen one. No matter how hard he fought, how he tried to distract himself from work, it all lead up to one person, not one other thought, never out of sight out of mind, he knew what he wanted and he fell so deep he felt like he just couldn't grasp it anymore, how was he supposed to live his life without you. Your soft gentle hands grazing his face and answering the stupid and goofy questions he asked. There was no one else and he knew that now, didn't even find anyone else attractive. Lonesome nights, he didn't want to be on his own, ever again. Once he found you he vowed to never let you go, no matter how loud your voice is, no matter if you kicked him down, your in his heart and he just cannot let go, but how long could he search? Huh? How long would it be until he found you? When will he hear your voice again? When will he kiss you again? He didn't even say I love you before you walked off, for all he knew, that was his last goodbye.

On the first day, he acted as if nothing happened, but then he realized you weren't there, he couldn't pick at your dinner plate, he could hear your laughs, he couldn't feel your pity hits after he whispers a dirty joke. He had no one to talk to, no one to ask him if he was okay. Was he...okay? Had he known he was okay? Or has he grown so long to the point where he wasnt and he just didn't know it. He wished he said more, begged you to stay, cried about it, weeped about it, there was so much he could've done and he didn't, he only said a short explanation of how he was waiting for you and now he's on the run, on the search. He was so tired, so tired of looking at the same spice on the ground, carving on the rock of the walls. He wanted to be next to you, holding your head in his shoulder, hear your soft snores as you slept like there wasn't a care in the world. He'd never expect this, a life without you. He sighed and shook the thought out of his head, noticing he was in too deep and he wiped the tears that slowly dropped from his face, letting out a sniffle as he looked ahead. He didn't want to be too deep, of course he missed you, but he wanted to find you with a clear conscience, a healthy mind. He needed something to keep him going. His eyebrows furrowed as he looked to the ground. He placed a palm down and leaned closer to the floor. What is this? This imprint on the floor? Looks familiar.

He looked over it, careful not to move or make any sudden movements. ¨y/n?¨ he muttered. Any normal person would've thought paul as crazy, looking like he's searching for spice on the floor, and then wanting to jump and cheer, because, well, because what?

The necklace

The necklace Paul got for her. It was there! Clear as day. What a time to cheer! He couldn't fight off the smile on his lips. She's alive! She's alive! What a joy, out for two years! Been all around Arrakis, and at such a time he was going to give up, go home, force himself to get comfortable with his new situation, you were out there. Shall he go home? To tell stilgar and have a celebration? Sweet red wine sounded like heaven. He wiped his eyes as finally, finally tears came down. Tears of joy, he waited for this moment, oh so long! He was so happy he could take the dirt and put it in his bag also.

He laughed, he found it funny how he grew so tired of being next to his queen that he went and found you himself after he told you to come back. He grew impatient. He took out his journal and wrote, writing his life away as he thought of you, as the warmness of love and hope crowded his vision and spreaded throughout his body. This is all he wanted, to find you. And he was so close, so, so close.

He hadn't felt like this in a long time. He got up and collected the dirt from the necklace in his hand and watched it fall from his gloves. Looking around and seeing the footsteps, all yours he believed! He looked before following the footsteps, he followed them foot by foot until he was in the sand again. He hunched over, trying to search for the footsteps as they were getting lost from the wind of the sand until he couldn't anymore. He stood and pulled out his compass for the direction that you went. When it pointed he saw and lifted his head in the direction you went. This was it, this was the final piece, this was the end.

You were home.

Taglist 🏷️

@ennycutie @cookiezxx

#dune part 2 #paul atredies x black!reader #paul atredies x reader #paul atreides #timothee chalamet x reader #timothee chamalet x black!reader #timothee x you #paul atreides x reader #timothee chalamet smut #paul atredies smut

[littlegiantposts]

Series of fortunate events

pairing: oikawa tooru x fem!reader

summary: the three times that oikawa tried get your attention, and the one time you noticed.

Question of the day: who’s ur fav haikyuu character? (Comment down below hehe)

a/n: self indulgent as frick and didnt check spelling soooo; reblogs r appreciated!!

Oikawa thought he was smooth with the ladies.

Hell, he even had a fan club that would occasionally bake him his precious milk bread.

He got girls wanting to be with him, and guys wanting to be him.

Oh, but alas, he had his eyes on one girl. Specifically, the girl in his econ class.

And, of course, she didn't give him the time of day.

It's not that you actively ignored Oikawa, you just were preoccupied with other things in your life.

And Oikawa loved that about you. You were so driven and a hard worker yet you made it look easy.

You did things so gracefully, that Oikawa started suspecting you're some kind of angel or something.

And don't get him started on how pretty you were. Iwaizumi has had enough of Oikawa gushing about how beautiful you looked during lunch.

"If you don't confess to her already, I'm so beating your ass, Shittykawa"

"That's not the greatest motivator, you know!"

It's easier said than done, Oikawa thinks.

First attempt.

He would get your coffee order, present it to you, you take notice of his thoughtfulness, and fall in love with him.

Easy peasy, lemon squeezy.

Oikawa noticed that you always had a hazelnut latte when you studied in the library on Mondays.

Don't ask why he knew your routine, he is just in-tune towards his crush that's all.

Definitely not occasionally following you around like a love-sick puppy. Of course not. That would be ridiculously ridiculous.

Oikawa was now walking to the library with two cups of joe in both of his hands.

He was nervous. He felt he might crush the paper cups with how hard he was gripping it.

His heart was beating so damn loud that he couldn't even hear his footsteps and tuned out all the people around him.

He was second-guessing, was this your coffee order? Did he just imagine it? What if you had a change of heart and hated lattes?

He eventually reached the library in the time of overthinking.

The doors to the library were closed, so he was peering in through the small windows to see where you were.

Knowing where you were would make his entrance seem more casual and cool when he eventually would walk up to you.

Boy was planning his whole speech, even a choreographed hair flip.

And, he was mentally preparing himself to look at your pretty face.

Gosh, you were so pretty.

While looking through, he didn't see you at any of the tables. He frowned.

Were you not there? Did you leave early today? If you did, his plans were foiled.

Oikawa felt a pang in his chest at the thought of failing. His shoulders visibly lowered at the depressing thought.

Then, it all happened all at once.

The library's door swung open, revealing you. If Oikawa took a step closer, he would have been hit by the sudden door opening. Simultaneously, a student had bumped into Oikawa's back, pushing him forward.

Your sudden appearance and the bump startled him, loosing his footing, but he was able to not fall on his face.

But, your favorite coffee beverage that was meant for you was now on your white blouse.

Y/n squeaked at the impact, knowing she couldn't really make more noise as she was partially still in the library.

The silence was loud, if that makes sense. Some people nearby were staring at the incident.

Oikawa fixated on the sound of the dripping of the caffeinated beverage.

Oh god, how can you mess up that badly. She probably thinks that you are the biggest dork to ever live.

Oikawa felt sick, like he was going to hurl.

The embarrassment made him look down, not being able to look you in your eyes.

Oikawa was caught up in his head and tuned out your concerned voice.

As much you were the one that coffee dripping from your shirt, you were asking if he was okay as his ears were turning red.

"S-sorry!" and with that, Oikawa sped walk away.

"Ooh, yeah, that's pretty bad" Matsukawa chimed in.

Oikawa blew out air in frustration.

"Have you tried talking to her since?"

"And say what? Hey, I know I spilled coffee on you, but I am practically in love with you so would you mind going on a date with me?" Oikawa indulges the idea.

"Well, at least you're being forward." Iwaizumi adds in.

Oikawa pouts and crossed his arms.

"What about you invite her to one of our practices? Hate to admit it, but girls tend to swoon over you when they watch you play." Iwaizumi offers with a shrug.

Oikawa gasp a the realization as if a light bulb appeared on top of his brown haired head.

"You're right! After watching my clever plays, it would be a piece of cake to sweep her off her feet. As if anyone can resist my charm." Oikawa puts his hands on his hips, chest swelling up with pride.

"Don't make me throw this volleyball at your face."

Attempt 2

Oikawa sat behind you in econ class. He decided to do the classic note passing to ask you to attend one of his practices.

"Hi! I'm sorry about the coffee incident! Would you mind me making up to you by inviting you to one of my volleyball practices?" was written on a piece torn from oikawa's notebook with a small winky face.

Aoba Johsai's volleyball typically didn't have observers/visitors. Other than other schools coming in for skirmages, but for the most part, no one else out of that social circle would be in a practice.

Y/n smiled down at the note as the feeling of warmth spread throughout her chest and face. She quickly jotted down her answer as an easy "yes! I would love to. Thx for the invite!"

The bell rang and Y/n got out of her seat, sending a smile and a wave to Oikawa, "Can't wait!" as she left the class.

To say Oikawa was happy was an understatement.

Overjoyed? Ecstatic? Thrilled? That, times 10.

As soon as you were out of the classroom, he pumped his fist in the air in victory, earning some weird glances from other students.

Oh boy, but he did not care.

He just scored some swooning time from you.

The day of practice arrived.

Oikawa kept making glances at the gym doors every couple minutes.

“She’ll be here, stop worrying or you’ll get gray hair”

Oikawa pouts.

Why weren’t you here yet? Given, it’s only been a couple minutes since school ended, but your last class wasn’t too far from the gym. So, naturally Oikawa worried.

But then, the steel door slides open and your head pops in and looks around, scanning.

Your eyes land on him and he can feel himself immediately standing straighter.

With recognition, you offer a small wave and a cheesy grin.

Oikawa feels like his heart is going to beat out of his chest. Gosh, you were adorable.

Oikawa jogs over to your entrance, “Hey! I’m glad you are able to make it!” He admits with a hand behind his head.

“Yeah, definitely. I wouldn’t want to miss a practice of THE seijoh volleyball club, of course” you giggled at your exaggeration.

Oh my god. Your giggle. Oikawa notes to look up some cheesy jokes later, he wants to hear that giggle of yours more.

“Well, well, well look what we have here.”

A voice chimes, approaching the pair. Hanamaki makes his way over.

He pats, or well, slaps, Oikawa's back, making him lurch a bit forward at the impact.

Way to make me look cool, Makki. Oikawa thinks.

“Is this THE y/n that I’ve heard so much about?”

Y/n tilts her head in confusion.

Oh my god, Oikawa feels his heart squeeze. You are too cute.

However Oikawa finally registers what Makki said.

Y/n wasn’t really popular so she was confused, “Who was talking about me?-"

She gets cut off but a tomato Oikawa.

“You are at the top for most of your classes so it makes sense that he’s heard of you. I-I mean there’s not a lot of people who go here so it’s a small world really. ” Oikawa rambles and frantically waves his hand around to change the subject quickly.

As much as Y/n is smart, she is equally dumb in understanding affection.

“Right yeah, that makes sense, I guess.” She shrugs it off, “You guys should probably head over and do your stretches.” Y/n notices that the coach has entered the gym.

The two volleyball looks over and nods their heads in agreement and make their way over. However, there definitely was a slight shove from the brown haired boy to his teammate.

As practice continued, it consisted of a lot of Oikawa showing off and making quick glances at Y/n to make sure she was watching.

Surely enough, she was watching and, of course, she was impressed. At some point Oikawa pulled the cliché of dedicating one of his excellent serves to Y/n, but the cheesiness wasn't enough to not make Y/n blush.

Then, the coach called to do some scrimmages between the team as they could form two whole teams.

Oikawa looked over at Y/n, her eyes cast down at her lap as she was on her phone, texting someone probably.

Cue WorryOikawa. Is she bored? Did I bore her? Does she want to leave? No, that would mess up my plan on walking her home and asking her out. Oikawa pouted that would probably cause him wrinkles in the future.

However, a clever idea popped up in his love-struck head. Oikawa jogged his way over his crush.

Y/n looked up expectantly and put down her phone and smiled. Oikawa could melt into a puddle, for real. His mind goes blank for a hot second.

"What's up?"

Oikawa almost got distracted and forgot about his mission, "Uh, we are going to start a match and I was wondering if you would want to be a line judge?"

"Oh, yeah sure! Sounds like fun."

Oikawa smiled and guided to Y/n where typical line judges stand, explaining her role in the most clear way possible.

Y/n had a simple understanding of volleyball, so she felt like watching where the ball goes won't be too hard. What can go wrong?

Oh, if she only knew.

The match began and both teams were giving it their all. Each time didn't pull forward a lot as the points were always near each other. With every spike, there was a block, then a counter, and repeated.

Then, during a long rally that felt like it was never going to end, Y/n was on the opposite side of where Oikawa's team played, watching the sidelines.

Oikawa sticks to his tried and true by sending a quick toss to Iwaizumi. It was a bit low, but he could make it work.

The opposing team, who was trying to narrow the course of his spikes for the majority of the match finally decided to commit to a three person block, providing immense pressure on the ace.

Y/n looked in awe at how it seemed like Iwaizumi stopped in mid-air.

It happened quite quickly, to be honest. One second, Y/n was staring at the line, but now she was staring at the ceiling of the gymnasium with a stinging feeling on her forehead and the bridge of her nose.

Feeling the pressure of the three person block, Iwaizumi was hoping a nice, sharp line shot, but his aiming was a bit flawed as it hit Y/n straight in her pretty face.

The impact sounded hard.

Y/n felt tears begin as her nose and forehead stung.

Oikawa watched in horror as his blood ran cold. As much as he wasn't the one spiking, it was a ball that he tossed and so he still felt extremely guilty.

He snapped back in reality, when he heard you say an audible "Ow" as you put your hand over where the ball made impact and sat up from the ground.

He ran towards you and noticed your tears.

He felt awful. Making your crush cry isn't something that anyone aims for.

"Are you okay, Y/n? Here, let me take you to the nurse's office."

However, coach was quick to shut down that idea as Oikawa was the setter and one of the important cogs in this well oiled machine.

Instead, coach offered to have one of the second years who were sitting on the sidelines to take Y/n to the nurse.

"But-" Oikawa starts to protest, but finds that refuting will only lead to unnecessary punishment.

The coach ends up calling one of the second years that were on the side lines to bring Y/n to the nurse. Oikawa pouts at the constriction in his chest that makes it hard to breathe.

He was pulled out of his pity party by a slap on his back, which shocked him, but he already knew who it was.

"It's going to be fine. Third times the charm", Iwaizumi reassures his childhood friend.

It's touching, really.

Oikawa has sought girl after girl in the past.

Iwaizumi knows this. He has to deal with the yapping of Oikawa every time he thinks he has found the "love of his life".

Weirdly enough, Oikawa's track record of significant others isn't the greatest. As much as he has many fangirls swarming around him, he tends to fixates on volleyball and disregards time with his partner, resulting in the end of the romantic relationship.

So, you can imagine the confusion on Iwaizumi's face as he watched Oikawa ponder what coffee order he should get to appear "cool" to you.

The amount of effort and time Oikawa is putting in his little profession of love is telling in of itself.

Not to mention, Oikawa doesn't know this, but Iwaizumi shares a class with Y/n and thinks they are really sweet and hardworking. So, he may not look it, but he is rooting for Oikawa and Y/n to get together.

Third attempt.

Flowers and chocolates. What could possibly go wrong? Stripping away all of the fluffy fluff and getting down to the basics.

At least, that's what Oikawa is telling himself.

He awaits for the period before lunch to end, that way, when he professes his love, he is able to either run away to his usual spot or spend a nice, relaxing lunch with his crush.

To ensure productivity, Oikawa practiced running to his locker, grabbing the flowers and chocolates, and calculating the fastest route to your class, so he wouldn't miss you by too much.

Oh, Oikawa. You didn't think about the lunch rush? And, of course, his fan club.

He is breaking a bit of sweat, clutching the flowers like his life depended on it and if he held onto the box of chocolates any tighter, the chocolates would be either crushed or melted.

Nonetheless, he makes it your class and takes a breathe, taking a peek inside. There you were in all your oblivious glory, packing your school bag. Oikawa sighed, you had a half of your hair up with a white bow holding it. Gosh, you were cute.

Oikawa blinked back into reality. He didn't realize the amount of students around him as they were going to their lockers or making their way to the lunchroom.

Oikawa takes a breathe and hyped himself up to talk to you, but he gets interrupted when a small girl with a bento box approaches him. He recognizes her as one of the girls who tends to cheer Seijoh's away matches.

He flashes a smile and says thank you. His eyes keep darting to the girl and Y/n's classroom door, making sure he doesn't miss his chance. He tries to keep the conversation short and simple because he is on the verge of professing his love to his crush.

Much to his dismay, other girls who have also openly claimed to be a part of Oikawa's fan club, makes their way over to him, as they thought this was a perfect opportunity for them to show their support by giving small baked gifts and other such things.

Oh, Oikawa was practically dying inside.

But, the moment he saw your white bow walk outside the classroom, his eyes widened. This is it. He drowned out the others and let out a "Y/n!" in an attempt to get your attention.

Oh, curse the lunch rush because Y/n does not end up turning around to see him, but looks around to see who called her.

Oikawa quickly tries to raise one hand, but the fangirls have formed a circle around him and the array of people walking up and down the halls are not in his favor.

Y/n, however, makes eye contact with Oikawa eventually, and Oikawa feels as if the air has been knocked out of him.

This is it. Y/n smiles at the familiarity, but then she casts her attention to the girls swarming him, and then back to Oikawa.

There's something behind her eyes, but Oikawa can't put his finger on it. But, god, did he just want to make his way towards you.

Y/n sends a tight-lipped smile his way and sends a small wave. She turns away and continues walking down the hall.

Oikawa feels his heart drop to his stomach.

That's it? You were probably already in line for lunch, chatting to one of your friends.

And there was Oikawa, in the hallway, clutching a box of chocolates and flowers that he bought along the way to school, so they were as fresh as possible for Y/n.

The crowd dissipates and Oikawa feels defeated. Maybe the universe just didn't want the two of you together.

Oikawa frowns at the thought. That's just rude, Oikawa curses any superior being above.

So, here is Oikawa, sitting with his almost deflated flowers and more deflated ego with a box of chocolates at a bench, waiting for Iwaizumi to be done in the locker room so they can walk home together.

Oikawa has planned a long rant for his beloved friend.

"You're thinking so hard, I think you might hurt yourself." A voice pipes in that makes Oikawa jump from his angry mental speech.

However, what shocks him more, is the familiarity of the voice.

He daydreams about it too much to not know who it is.

He whips his head to see Y/n there. She turned her head to the side in curiosity to what got the brown haired boy so worked up.

"What's got you thinking so hard?" Y/n plops down next to him.

Oikawa saw this ironic opportunity and ran with it.

He took a deep breathe, "So, there was this girl..." and told his whole ordeal with all his attempts.

You listened to all of it with care and attention.

"Well, if you just tell her all the trouble you went through, I'm sure she would understand and give you a chance" Y/n reasons.

How ironic.

"You know, you're right. Will you go out with me?" What has he got to lose?

Now, Y/n has officially short circuited.

"Wait, what?!"

"Will you do me the honor of taking you out?"

"Me?! I'm the girl?"

"Yeah, you were." Oikawa shys away a bit.

"So, those flowers and chocolates are", a short pause, "mine?"

"Yeah, they are" he answers.

Y/n looks at him with a look of sincerity and a smidge of disbelief at how sweet the boy in front of her.

She looks at his eyes, then down at his lips and thinks, why not?

Y/n kisses the boy she has been crushing on since forever.

"So, is that a yes?" Oikawa presumes.

"Hmm, I'll think about it." She answers with a cheeky smile.

#oikawa toru x reader #haikyuuxreader #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu x reader #oikawa tōru #oikawa x reader #oikawa toru x y/n #oikawa fluff #oikawa tooru #oikawa

[moon-child-cypher]

Chapter 1 : ON

 BTS OT7 , OT7xYN , NamjoonxYN, SeokjinxYN, YoongixYN, HoseokxYN, TaehyungxYN, JiminxYN, JungkookxYN

TW: Mental illness, psychosis, depression, body dysmorphia, past bullying, casual sex, loss of relationship, violence, talk of weapons, blood

   As the leader of Bangtan , Namjoon felt the weight of his responsibilities to bangtan and he had felt it worse since you left. In a way, he was happy he had to focus on the others' well being . Somedays when his responsibilities felt heavier than others, he could lose himself in Bangtan and, for a moment, it would feel like things were how they were before everything fell apart. One thing he couldnt deny was that heartbreak had been an amazing motivator. Throwing themselves into their work Bangtan had gone from a small group of friends who knew how to get things done, to a feared syndicate with complex connections and a massive income.  Namjoon could sometimes convince himself that it hadnt been for you, it hadnt been so if he ever saw you again you would be so impressed that you couldnt say no to him. Couldnt say no to his brothers.

 Nothing prepared him for the day you showed up in their lives again. The usually composed Namjoon was a mess with you in the same room. He had walked into the boardroom for a financial meeting, one that would help secure their place as the underground kings of Seoul, and found you right away. You were sitting amongst the attendees, as though you being there was of no major circumstance. Sitting attentively as though you could just show up and be another name in a long list of faces . Feeling his stare you , nervously met his eyes, and he felt like his heart stopped beating. It was you, really you. Yes, in five years something about you had changed , but in that moment he would have done anything for you and you knew it. He had almost forgotten the rest of Bangtans appearance until he heard them shuffling in behind him and he began to panic. He swore he fell in love with you more when your eyes softened in understanding at his sudden panic. Of course he still seemed cool and collected on the surface, but you knew better.

Yoongi had spent his life hiding his feelings, except for with you. Always cool and collected, thats what got him this far in life and Bangtan. When others were motivated by emotion, and ethics, Yoongi was cold facts and logic. You had seen through thst though. You always told him that when you looked in his eyes , you saw a deep pool of emotions that you wanted to drown in. He had showed you affection to the best of his abilities and you had seen them for what they were and on a rare occasion held him while he wept. Not wanting to talk about it, not wanting an explanation, just offering absolute understanding. He went numb after you left, it wasnt safe to feel those emotions, the world would burn and he had been having enough trouble keeping Hoseok under control. He never gave up hope that you would return , though. Worked relentlessly to build an empire with Bangtan hoping that one day when youd come back you would join them again. Everything he did was for you and Bangtan knew that, they didnt stop him because they felt the same. He wondered sometimes, if their loss of you, was the only thing they had in common anymore. Not that it mattered, since it had been working well for  them.    Today he was grumpy. He had been up all night going over blueprint after blueprint and was still expected to attend the meeting. Pretty useless, as all the paperwork would end up on him and Namjoons desk to go over , this meeting could have definitely been an email. He kept his eyes trained on the back on Namjoons head and followed him into the room where he would be bored to death for whatever duration it took, but Namjoon seemed eager to leave as well and he took that as a good sign. Hoseoks sudden tense on walking the room sent Yoongi immediately on alert. He has a moment to wonder to himself if Hoseok or their business  partners would be a bigger threat before he locked eyes with you , and before he could fully register that it was you he felt like he was drowning.

 Hoseok had in his own way taken your absence the hardest. Growing up his life had been spent in one mental hospital or another. His craving for violence , his paranoia were enough for his parents to abandon him as a ward of the state at 15, in the end he had aged out of these homes and met Namjoon, who saw a use in his unique set of skills and outlook on the world. Beginning only as Namjoons body guard , he now was in control of a small army with a special gift for violence who knew how to get things done and Hoseok had found happiness, but he found contentment when you walked into their lives. It was almost as though your presence had made all the voices go silent.  As if all the voices were in absolute awe of your presence and didnt dare speak unless spoken too. You were the first one to make him feel human in his whole life. You had said that he had an adaptation to his reality, not a malfunction , and that he was still worthy of love and respect like any human. Up until you the only respect he had experienced was at the cost of his bloodlust. His fellow Bangtan members loved him, of course, but they still saw him for what the rest of the world saw and always had a trace of fear behind their eyes. Not you though.

  When you had left he had seen to it that the world would burn. Every person who betrayed Bangtan, every time someone crossed his path, was paying for your absence. Part of him was punishing the world because he couldnt punish you, not that he would any ways. He was unstoppable because what could hurt more than you abandoning him, right? Nothing scarier than a man who isnt afraid of dying and more often than not Hoseok had hoped he would make one wrong move, that someone would finally stop his reign of terror, because the voices would stop . They talked about you a lot, they also talked about his Bangtan family. The voices told him that they could see right through him, and it made sense because they never made a move to stop him. He did sometimes wonder what you would think of him now. He knew youd be scared of him , of who he had become, but he would silently remind himself that he did it for YOU.

  The voices had been particularly annoying today. He was itching to get on the field, do what he did best, but instead he had to attend a board meeting with Namjoon as his protection and a founding member of Bangtan. He just had to make it through this meeting and he would be left to his own devices, he expected a particularly trigger happy evening for him and his army. He walked behind Namjoon taking in every detail, every possible security threat. There was a heavier defense sytem in this building , he noted, if things went wrong Hoseok would have the chance to take out his frustrations in order for them to  escape. Namjoon stopped just inside the doorway and froze, sending Hoseok into attack moden for a moment. Was Namjoon hit? Was there danger in the room? After taking a quick glance at Namjoon seing no obvious injuries, he scanned the room. That's when he locked eyes with someone and the voices stopped.

 To anyone who knew anything about Bangtan, Jin was the glue that held them together. In a group of unloved boys who came together to build this life together, Jin offered a quiet understanding and a warm  home.  You had said that he served as such a master manipulator for Bangtan because he had an unbiased, deep understanding of people,even strangers. You can't use peoples thoughts and emotions against them unless you truly understand what motivates them, you had said. He believed you because that is what you had always offered him just that. From your small nods and warm smile after a tough mission, or taking the role as caretaker of Bangtan when he felt his exhaustion deep in his bones. He hadnt connected with anyone on any level since you left. Why bother? He was a master of being ingenuine, even attempting to open up to someone he wouldnt know what to believe what he was really feeling. But you, you understood with just a look and that's what he needed. Surprisingly his lack of his own emotion helped him even further understand others emotions. He was a blank slate and he was a projection of those around him.

That was why it was important he attended this meeting. Namjoon needed to know if they had any ulterior motives, if they were trying to trick them into losing money. What Namjoon and the others had never said is this one just one more step to giving you the life you deserved when you returned. He felt the shift as soon as they entered the room and automatically began to assess the situation and then he was looking at you as he was hit with guilt, surprise, hurt and most of all, love.

Taehyung had been dfferent his whole life. From the time he was old enough to play with the kids at the park they bullied him, knowing he wasnt quite like them so he must be weak, right? Wrong. He grew up to be devilishly handsome and with that his odd tendencies were labelled cute quirks. His past still shaped him , though. Seeing the cruelty of people, even at such a young age he recognized it was human nature. Taehyung felt emotions deeply, maybe too deeply, but it served him well as the secret keeper of Bangtan. See , anyone and everyone loves to talk, especially about themselves. All he had to do was flash a smile and lend an ear and a few careful questions and people were ready to tell him everything. It all went straight to Namjoon of course , and he mosty stuck to the shadows, only making public appearances with Bangtan when necessary. His charm never worked on you. You had told him he was beautiful , and that there was something about him that made it easy to open up to him. But you were naturally a genuine person, especially with him. 

When others blew off his personality, the way he dressed, and his words, you looked at him like he was a piece of art. You once told him a day with him did more for the heart and mind than any art ever could. He had scoffed at that , because, how could any piece of art, any piece of music, any natural wonder measure up to you? Their love had been like something out of an old movie. Slow dancing to old jazz records in his room, reading to eachother poems that only conveyed a fraction of the love that they had felt for eachother. 

When you had left, Taehyung had disappeared back into his shell. There's only so many side eyes and remarks one can make before it wears away at oneself. He still found himself saving songs from old vinyls and poems ripped from books for you to enjoy when you came back. Outwardly, to anyone who didnt know better, Taehyung had become cold. While in the past he used warmth, and flirting to get people to talk, he now opted for intimidation and cruelty. He had become the bully and you would have hated that for him. 

He hadnt wanted to go to this meeting, even before he saw Bangtan eye his green suit up and down. He didnt need them to be picking him apart, that was his job, and his patience was low today. Walking along with his brothers he kept himself amused by humming a jazz song he had discovered on a vinyl he had found in the back of some vintage store or another. It was soft and bright, like you, but inside he felt deep and sorrowful . The sudden stop off Hoseok had him bumping into him and jumping back. He could feel Hoseok itching for combat and it was putting Taehyung at unease , he didnt want to be the target of Hoseoks rage today. Taehyng quickly looked around to see what would cause Hoseok to be so careless, who was going to be the subject of his wrath and then he saw you. Like the greatest treasure at any museum, like the grandest orchestra , there you were.

 If lust had a physical embodiment, it would be Jimin. He  just oozes sex to men and women alike , and knew how to use it to get what he wanted. Jimin always had a taste for the finer things in life, always wanting more. When he had met Namjoon he had already been living a gluttoous lifestyle, but Namjoon made him realize he had a talent that could be utilized for something bigger, greater. Whole empires have been brought down because of sex, and Jimin wanted to build an empire on it. While he had grown soft and affectionate towards his members over the years, others would describe his gaze as hawk-like, like a predator zooming in on ikts prey. YN had never seen that, she saw right through him. To late nights hiding under the covers, memorizing every curve and imperfection of eachothers bodies you were the first actually intimacy he had ever experience. He thought arousal had equated intimacy until you, how a single peck on the forehead could leave him powerless to you.

When you left Jimin had tried to convince himself that his long list of high profile one night stands were for work, but he eventually had to face the music and realize it was intimacy he was craving. Taehyung, as odd as he was, seemed to understand this, and would quietly hold his hand or grab his thigh affectionately under the table when he could. This didnt help, he appreciated it, but it just made him feel like he was more alone. A steady sex life had proven to be very lucrative to Bangtan, but he felt so alone.

Jimin had left a lover in his bed that morning to join the boys at a meeting. Jimin felt the need to complain, to hide his relief that he wouldnt have to see the stranger off, someone else could take care of that. As they walked in the building, immediately a group of secretaries were whispering behind their hands about him and he flashe them his most seductive style. Just like that he had them, he would have to remember their faces for when they were done with the meeting. He couldnt resist himself and flashed a smile at an especially flustered man in a three piece suit. Jimin had him right where he wanted him and it wasn too easy. Jimin strutted into the room thinking about all the possibilities with these coworkers but his steps failed him and his cockiness left him as he saw you. Then, with one quick moment of eyecontact, he knew you couldnt leave because you were all he ever needed.

Jungkook hated his smile, his bunny teeth making him look even younger than he already was, and as the youngest he didnt need to be reminded of that. You had loved his smile , which worked out well because you were the major source of it. Jungkook knew his weapons, he had turned his body into his biggest weapon with an unhealthy excercise routine but the most deadly weapon in his world was your laugh. Jungkook  never had a great body image, you later suggested body dysmorphia, and you were the only one he believed ever liked his body. He couldnt look in the mirror and see what everyone else saw. That's why when you left he became obsessed with perfecting himself as a weapon. The burn and exhaustion gives him something to focus on instead of your laughter. At first the memory of your laugh was the only comfort he found, then in his mind it became mocking, telling him he was worthless. That was bad but not as bad as when he forgot what it sounded like all together. You never treated him as the baby of the group but as an equal and he almost believed it. You two were a sanctuary from the reality of thet lifestyle, laughing until your stomachs hurt and sharing memories of his hyungs and sharing the secret knowledge that all of them were secretly the  most amazing generous people you  knew. But now he was just the baby again, talked down on,not respected , no matter how much he worked out and built his strength.

This morning he had a moment in front of the mirror and thought of what you would think of him now, what would you think of the empty shells Bangtan had become? None of it mattered without you here, and why do they keep pretending that it did? Jungkook was the last one to enter the room. This was related to a shipment of weapons and that was his line for bangtan, but one of his hyungs could have taken care of it , he felt particularly ugly today but straightened his back, and walked in. Immediately he noticed his hyungs freeze and was alarmed by such an intense set of emotions that these usually well composed men were feeling and so he followed their gaze and there you were. He felt himself deflate, and relaxed his stance when your eyes met and couldnt help but smile the first genuine, full bunny teeth smile that he had in years.

 You knew logically that they were going to be there, of course they had to be there, but nothing had prepared you for this. They had betrayed you, you shouldnt have any more emotional connection to them, you owed them nothing, but then why was this so hard? You had left Bangtan and started a new profession in a new place the honest way, but years of living with bangtan you could no longer afford your lifestyle on an honest job salary so that's how you ended up in weapons deals. You purposely didnt keep track of the boys, as they hurt too much to think about. Youre only clue of just how big and successful they had gotten recently when you had been informed about your purpose foe this meeting . Your boss had taken your hesitance as concern about getting involved with Bagtan and reassured you that your name would not be connected to them on paper but he had no idea how connected you already were to them. They would know now from the way the seven boys honed on you and were now staring at you. You had tried to blend in the crowd of seats but that had been unsuccessful. The worst part of it all is as soon as she saw them she felt the pain of being in love with these men all over again.

#bts x reader #bts mafia fic #bts mafia au #bts mafia imagine #hoseok #jhope fanfic #yoongi #yoongi fanfic #yoongi mafia #namjoon #namjoon fanfic #namjoon angst #jin fanfic #taehyung #bts v fanfic #bts fanfic #bts jimim #bts jimin fanfic #jungkook #jungkook fanfic #jungkook au #bts poly fic #bts werewolf au #bts poly au

[fortunatelyenchantingtaco]

I know Geto is like a big sore spote in the whole fandom and i might be a bit insane, but i do love his story specifically because i dont think there is a way to fix it

We are being shown that well, he got really depressed and went into self isolation. In most cases, the best course of action would be to remove him from distress and have time to heal. The issue is that Geto couldnt just leave — he believes he needs to kill curses, and to become stronger he needs to eat them which distresses him further, and if he leaves people will die, and he cant ignore that just to keep himself sane. For a man like him if he head a specific goal to become strong for, i dont think the eating process would have been such a big issue, but we have to have a big distinction that jujutsu sorcerer is, at the end of the day, a profession. You’re not a chosen superhero to save the world. Those growing up in clans may have a worse childhood, but growing up with understanding that yes curses exist its part of nature does make it easier to bear. Which is one of reason why Gojo, even while having all the trauma, didnt have such gripes with reasons or goals — this is a life he was born into.

Thinking of sorcery as more than a job makes you perceive yourself as more of a hero, and heroes are good and just and get recognition. Non sorcerers dont know about them. Geto fell into a trap of doing something for others and despairing. Its easier not to think about that shit when you’re naturally good at it, and you have fun — which is why Amanai situation and Gojo becoming stronger was so bad. Now he went on missions alone, which meant no company to distract him, and now it was no longer all fun shits and giggles, its a job full of tragedies. Considering Gojo was targeted since birth, we can assume he killed people before Toji, death is, unfortunately, familiar to him. Not for Geto — not seeing someone you care about die right before you, and certainly not being that close to death himself. He’s not longer the best at it, and its no longer fun, and he gets no recognition. Tobe precise, those are not bad thinks to want — we all want them. But if you dont get them here he would have been better to ya know. Find another job probably

Like the worst part about this whole thing is that some shit like that would have happened eventually one way or another, they’re not invincible. Childhood would eventually end, and in a way Geto spiraling is inevitable. The system is inherently flawed, and the issue they deal with is cruel. Some jobs are much more dangerous and have a detrimental effect on your mental health — its just that no one thought to give jujustu sorcerers some help, which is another problem. Adding the fact that he’s neither a saviour being thanked by everyone, or a strongest, yeah, he can’t figure out how to do this shit.

In AUs, I do think there are ways he could have handled it. Like if Gojo wasn’tin school, maybe he took his whole education with the clan? Or my au where he’s in a prison realm for centuries? Like yeah, sure, if Geto was the strongest, the only person here, i do think he would have probably felt invaluable. Youre great for your profession, you were born for it, why would you leave?

This may be projecting, but i do think his way of thinking about it is inherently flawed, a very slippery slope. People need a goal, a meaning, but looking for it outward is a sure way to get yourself into a slump, I went through this shit in a nasty manner when everything i did revolved around other people. Basing your decisions on what others would think is an easy way to pretend like its not your responsibility. This is why Gojo tells Megumi to be selfish and this is why during the entrance exams Yaga says that others wont appreciate your actions and you cant base your motivations off others.

Thats the ultimate tragedy, the fact that thinking like Geto did is ridiculously easy. You go into uni on the same course as your friend just to be with them and when something goes wrong your first thought would be that you did that for them, even thought its your life choices and decision. Yeah.

I have no conclusions for you, just some ramblings. I like my Geto mean and fucked up and insecure, makes him so real and relatable as a person.

#jjk #jujutsu kaisen #geto suguru #jjk analysis #yeah #i dont think gojo could have fixed it #or anyone #or even absence of toji and happy ending for amanai #i think this would have happened one way or another #i know many would say im probably too hard on geto #im projecting i agree #but also its so fucking easy to think others owe you shit for your actions #so then when you get nothing its hurts worse #in a way #geto solved thst problem with his genocide #gave himself meaning #good for mental health #bad for everything else #tbf #life is fucked up and horrible and his way of survival is just one of them #but personally i judge #just because i was there and it makes me feel too mych

[rthrmrgn]

i did a quick run down/note summary on antoinette’s role as a plot device, just because i know some idiot will insist lestat actually loved her and wanted her and was cheating on louis emotionally yada yada yada

okay, as a refresher:

lestat is craving a change, so he starts seeing antoinette, also louis is busy pondering the meaning of existence etc.

louis saves claudia, asks lestat to turn her, he does, theyre a happy family, but claudia in her rebellion arc starts resenting lestat for turning her, tells on lestat still seeing antoinette. lestat says he’ll kill her soon

claudia leaves, louis becomes depressed, lestat is still seeing antoinette

claudia comes back, lestat attacks her, lestat and louis fight and lestat leaves, lestat asks to be taken back, claudia and louis say the condition is that he must kill antoinette

lestat agrees, but later it is discovered he didnt actually kill her, however, she’s still a human atp

refresher on the scene between lestat and antoinette in ep 6:

antoinette is telling lestat neither claudia nor louis deserve him

she says she wants to run away, just the two of them

lestat says “dont be ridiculous, theres no place for me other than new orleans” (louis is still a priority)

“i seek refuge here from complaints” (she is only a distraction)

“promises were made” / “and promises will be kept” (and they were, but lestat never delivers without ulterior motives. yes not even when it comes to louis, especially when it comes to the toy he’s got wrapped around his fingers)

the conversation claudia and louis have after discovering antoinette is still alive, louis sounds resigned. i think if lestat heard this (which he probably did), the lack of reaction must have angered him further.

next time antoinette was present is, as we just found out was after this when they are in the park and claudia is talking to louis abt leaving on the train and eventually decides to go off alone. antoinette is already turned and there, listening.

so what happened to lestat internally between these two scenes that made him wanna grant her with the dark gift, which already came back to bite him in the ass with claudia?

well, first of all, lestat thinks claudia is poisoning louis against him. and in a way he is right, claudia starts pitching to louis that they should leave, plotting with him (or rather at him) even while loustat are having sex. louis is often distracted, lost in his thoughts, dissociative, but lestat must know usually it is claudia talking his ear off, which is the main reason he decides to turn antoinette in the first place imo... so he can have someone listen in on their conversations. and with louis’ lack of reaction after discovering them,i think he was also hoping that by turning her, louis would take her more seriously as a “rival” and he could get a similar reaction out of louis, like he did when louis swam all the way down the river to find him.

so in conclusion: he really just wanted antoinette there so louis can never keep things from him, they Forever have someone that can keep louis “fighting” for his attention. and in a way she’s a third to keep them from driving each other insane, just like claudia was meant to be, but she’d be completely submit herself to lestat, the way claudia never would.

#iwtv #interview with the vampire #long post #i apologize........i needed my little diary to let this all out

[hiro-doodlez]

HELP I can't see my therapist for a couple of weeks and am currently having something i like to dub "yet another hiro autism crisis" where i contemplate if my therapist gave me the right diagnoses (she has told me she is not certified to give autism diagnoses, and instead more things like depression) Right now, I am diagnosed with ADHD, Anxiety/ Social anxiety (its still up in the air, DPDR, and depression. idk if that matters SO NOW I LIST RANDOM THINGS that could be considered symptoms or not I DUNNO HOW TO DO THISS feel free to ask questions about some of the crap i say here half of it doesn't make sense

First off, I have a general trouble understanding most social situations, and struggle sometimes when talking about practically anything. For example, earlier today my step-mom basically said she wasnt going to finish her food and let my brother have it. my brother said he would leave 2, he didnt (BOZO) and later after he left she found the empty container and said something along the lines "HAH! I thought he said he was gonna leave me 2!" and immdeiately without thinking i went "hey! you said he could have as many as he can! and hes working 10 hours a day and needs his energy!!" half jokingly and she got mad at me for it, we got into a mini argument over that.

When saying something thats serious, i tend to make a joke around it and i have NO CLUE why. I just CANT be openly upset around people. For example, when being told about something that happened to me as a kid that NEVER SHOULD HAVE HAPPENED RAGRHAGHAG, instead of having a breakdown and being reasonably upset, i burst out into giggles and laughs while my brother was just so fucking confused on what was wrong. It was kinda like i couldn't stop and it fucking sucked

The TINIEST things can upset me, and other HUGE things can have little to no effect. Its so incredibly annoying

I have INTENSE fluxuations in interests, hobbies, and motivation for certain projects. I will start on this huge project that im INCREDIBLY excited for, and then a week later have little to no interest in continuing it.

I make everything about my personality a joke, i dont know why. EVERYTHING i tend to say or do has to be funny. it's like i dont want people to see beneath that

I fluctuate in personality A TON, especially depending by the people i am around. At school, I'm the quiet kid. I don't talk to anyone except maybe 5 people, but other than that i tend to stay completely silent. It could be a mask? i dunno. but when im at home, ask my brothers, i am BOUNCING OFF THE WALLS. it might also be me just getting some of my energy out? RRAHHH I DUNNOOO

I will simply forget to do very important things to the point of endangering my health. Like forgetting to eat for a day straight. my step-mom thinks i have an ED AND I DONT. i literally just keep realizing suddenly at like 6 pm all i have eaten is a couple of skittles and pringles.

i have no clue how talking to people works and im constantly winging it. I forget how to have friends especially how to even talk or interact with them and its so stupid. I can't ever start a conversation with someone without having at least 5 minutes going "am i weird for this am i being annoying am i being clingy".

If i say even one thing wrong i WILL be thinking about it for DAYS thinking about how they probably hate me now and im a terrible person ect. ect.

I tend to hide many of my traits (especially good ones) because i am incredibly embarrassed and never want anyone to EVER compare themselves to me.

im a people pleaser does that count

i tend to get extremely upset if i get told one bad thing about something that i like or just a project i have. For example, I had this fandom silly man poll because i just wanted to find out who was silly. Then one of my friends just posted something like "i hate fandom polls theyre the worst" and i just lost complete motivation afterwards. I haven't touched that blog in WEEKS at this point becuase i simply have no more interst

I have had a meltdown or 2 before, and they both stemmed from being told about how i was a bad person. i don't know why the hell thats a thing

I can't stay focused on one thing for long periods of time (ADHD cough cough) Like literally earlier i was watching this video about autistic traits and i kept having to back the video up because i would get sidetracked in my mind to the point where im just not listening anymore

if im not paying attention to people sometimes I SWEAR theyre saying "ffajaleifnanamzmaldafjkjeffnma" and as soon as i start noticing it suddenly theres words again. hate that.

i have times where it can kinda seem like i cant speak, and if i do everything comes out wrong and jumbled. Like when my autistic friend would have a sensory related meltdown, i would never know what to do and end up going dead silent because of being so mad at myself for not knowing how to help (any tips actually hahahahaHOW DO I HELP)

i have little idea who the hell i am. had a mini-crisis because i didn't know what my favorite color was because before, it was the color my friend with synesthesia said i was and i just went with that (i think its purple or blue i have no fucking clue JFALJK)

i will have spikes of random motivation on one thing. like learning lanugauges, i will have a week where its so easy to get like 10 lessons on duolingo done a day and then the next week its a struggle to get even one done.

i focus better with distractions ??? I can't focus without music and tend to do better on reading tests if everyone else in the class is talking ???

i remember the most random things about certain things. Like, i could not for the LIFE of me remember what color that one persons hair that i was talking to for 15 minutes straight. but i can remember that they had pink socks on. WHY IS THAT WHAT I REMEMBER??

I hate organization and doing the same thing every day. i NEED chaos. My brother a little bit ago helped me out and got me to make a personal to-do list. i couldnt do it a single day even though the things were extremely simple like "brush hair, make bed, eat breakfast ect."

i zone out a LOT. especially when people bring up topics im uncomfortable with or conflict with my current feelings. i go into a kinda little talking (not nonverbal, i can still talk) or just confused state that freaking sucks.

when im in a high energy mood i tend to not feel.. reall???? I do many things overboard and annoy the heck out of my brothers. i always feel terrible afterwards.

Idk if this is weird to say but i tend to get really off put when people im comfy with get haircuts or major changes in their appearance. I never like the change no matter what the hair cut looks like. i dont have any clue why

i have no clue whether or not any of this is real or if I have managed to make it all up in my head. (bascially when i was younger i wanted attention and ended up faking depression for a year straight and was an absolute ass to my friends and blah blah blah)

#hiro.txt #autism #neurodivergent #neurodiversity #autistic #mental illness help #asd #asd help #nd help #rrahh #like i cant tell if i am masking INCREDIBLY WELL or not #i have no clue #oh its almost 1 am LOL

[the-stray-liger]

You know I never saw anything relating to this series but what are your thoughts on Iron Blooded Orphans?

HOOOO BOY. places my hands on the table

(Sorry that I cant put this into a readmore bc Im on mobile;;)

I fucking hate it. Like honest to god it was so disappointing and depressing that I didnt even finish it (I do know how it ends and it doesnt make it any better). I literally never shut up about this but I'll never not be mad that it had the most beautiful ost and animation and the coolest worldbuilding (the whole story about the colonization of Mars and the poverty of those who lived there, the set up of an army of child soldiers who couldn't read, even the alaya-vijnana system??? All of it creative and so full of potential) and then they made the story shit

Why is it shit to me? The fact that it's just straight up suffering porn. I'm no stranger to sad gundam I have watched almost 40 years of gundam content in the last 3 or 4 years, I have cried my share and I know gundam is well known for being tragic. But IBO? Nooo IBO had to be sad as shit and it gives just little morsels of joy that it immediately kills off, literally. So instead of the theme of gundam, which is about human beings learning to understand each other to leave behind armed conflict, IBO is just like. Hey we're just gonna kill all the characters you like for pure shock value bc wr don't know how to writr

Another reason was the characters. A huge thing in gundam is that characters aren't good or bad except in a few specific instances because it's, well, war, and we're often made to confront the antagonists as people, flawed but also human and it's not that hard to even relate to them because of it. But IBO antagonists were straight up disgusting. The main antagonist was a literal pedophile, his best friend and all their army treated the people from Mars as literal rats. They were openly contemptuous of them for being children, for being POOR and for being disabled too. Like their only motivation is to squash everything that the story had that brought joy

Not even gonna get into how it really said "we're gonna drive in the point that children, women and the poor and disabled are the first and most affected victims of war and systematic economic oppression by showing children, women, the poor and the disabled explicitly suffering just because". Like the destruction of the Turbines and the deaths of Lafter were just. For the sake of hurting the viewers. There's none of the nuance you'd usually get in gundam, just outrage and no catharsis

And don't get me started on Mikazuki? People talk mad shit about Kira not having a personality (which to be fair, besides "fucking other ppl's girlfriends", he doesn't) but Mika's ENTIRE FUCKING PERSONALITY was being an enabler to Orca. He had potential too (I liked that he wanted to learn how to read! That was genuinely wholesome) but they had to just. Not do anything with it. Before you come to me and tell me Setsuna also had a serious, aloof personality🍰, allow me to remind you that Setsuna was traumatized, he was flawed, he was also impulsive and angry. Mikazuki had 2 modes, Orca and Horny.

ANYWAY I have more thoughts but I think that's the gist of it.

#i just realized theres a cake emoji #that was completely by accident but im gonna leave it there

[inlove-and-healing]

okay so ive bad this idea in my head for a while... since i was 11, as a matter of fact, sonit would need some polishing to make it a little less cringe.

so, an undertale au. its called torturetale.

frisk falls into the underground, kills Sans, and uses his soul to leave the underground. (who knows, i may have them kill alphys and have sans take the royal scientist role because yknow, look at his shed... but the main thing is that i need the judge role left vacant.)

anyway, alphys (or whoever is in her place) kinda goes... insane. not like the neutral endings where she commits suicide, shes just straight up crazy.

the amalgamates still kind of happen, but instead of being test subjects for DETERMINATION, she uses them as test subjects for a thing that like 1) makes them immortal (so suicide isnt an option) and 2) brings them agony.

maybe its different for every monster? like some types will be bedridden with illness forever, others are in overwhelming pain, others are extremely depressed and anxious... maybe.

(or heres what i could do: frisk kills undyne, which causes alphys to go insane. then after she infects everybody with whatever it is, asgore has her executed, and sans takes her role. maybe? we'll see.)

anyway, this is where the weird stuff starts happening.

so during the war between monsters and humans, the human sorcerers killed a (skeletal) boss monster and used magic to preserve its soul.

this group, kind of like the umbrella corps from resident evil or hydra from marvel, takes the soul. then they kidnap this kid (was an OC, might end up being a reader insert?? probably what ill do, thats what im most comfortable with writing) (also by kid i mean teen) and combine their soul with the monster one.

so parts of their limbs are fully skeletal, their eyes are all black except for the irises (one is blue and the other is yellow). they, like everybody in the underground (even though nobody knows it yet) are immortal. they can teleport, summon gaster blasters and bone attacks, so theyre basically like sans. (when i first came up with this, i thought that gaster was related to sans and papyrus, so i thought maybe the soul would belong to their mother or something??)

anyway, the group uses the kid like an assassin. they make them believe that theyre the good guys, until they discover something that makes them run away, which is how they fall into the underground.

so because the ruins are closed off, everybody down there is unscathed. but toriel tells you that her friend on the other side told her thst things were "bad", and everybody was suffering, but he didnt tell her anything else. then he says one day that he has to go somewhere else, and he doesnt know when hell be back, if ever. (assuming i go the "sans becomes the scientist" route.)

kid tells toriel theyre immortal, and toriel asks them to go check on sans, which is how they find out whats going on in the rest of the underground.

they make it to hotland, and sans' lab, and they work together in the true lab using what few notes alphys took to find a way to reverse what happened.

then maybe an alternate ending, where frisk comes back after everybodys cured. when they meet the kid, they act like sans (i made the kid, called ayanze when she was my oc, to take sans' role. thats why he originally died.) and when frisk gets to hotland, no matter whether or not frisk killed anybody else, sans fights them in his lab. he can be spared if its a neutral/pacifist run (mettaton breaks in for a show and is like sans get the fuck out, but in a genocide or neutral run if you choose to kill sans mettaton breaks in after) and then the kid is the final boss.

because theyre immortal, you beat them by making them lose hope.

so, thats my idea. feel free to leave any suggestions you may have. ive wanted to write this forever but never had the motivation. maybe now i will.

(i will be doing this on a separate blog, which will likely become an ask blog when the first part ((before frisk comes back)) is completed)

#undertale #undertale au #undertale multiverse #undertale fandom #tw suicide #suicide tw

[friedbreadwombat]

Fuck was it just me or did naruto glorify sasuke being a, i dont know what they were going for he had no personality. Oh sorry I meant no character. Itachi is a depressed A grader boye who needs a lot of therapy and maybe olivia rodrigo.

But like, theyre supposed to be the ideal good thing we strive to be.

Bitch I dont wanna be boring.

They look like they actually need help. Itachi is also a child soldier. Solely because "hes a prodigy" its considered legal. No hes still a child, he has all autonomy stripped from him, he does not live, he lives dying. Because his life is war. His life is taking orders. His life is not making even one decision that's motivated by himself. Sure, you can count him sparing sasuke, despite being bound by his position and his authoritatives. But he just lives to fight and then dies at 21. He got a house sure but hes dyin. Boy's dyin. But hey, thats life. You die. Fuck. If it were that simple, we'd just be machines. Not human beings. Thats not human. Literally. If itachi is supposed to be a person, hes a person who is unsurprisingly, existing in sheer agony. Let him live you fucks. Leave britney alone. Jesus christ.

Anyway stan deidara boye literally fights armless with a knife in his mouth do you know how hard that is no because none of yall have ever set foot in a fight of any kind. Even if you havent not many people can do this, its like, ancient archery vs modern archery. It used to be like a gunpowderless gun, ancient warriors could do so much shit with it that most of us have no idea how it works, today. Things we didn't even know we could possibly do with a fucking bow.

And here homeboy out fighting adaptively with a knife in his mouth and with literal clay. Hes murdering people with clay. How many of yall can murder people with clay. And on top of all he can do, be a successful icon artist man that tops the character fan fave poll the moment he dropped, like he was kazuha from genshin. He gone in a mothafuckin flash and people still rember him. He's just that iconic.

Like have any of you tried punching people with clay. Do you think that fucking works.

No.

If you do, clay fucking shatters. Clay is like the ego of a fuckboy, instant death on first hit.

If he makes it cement he can't mould it. You carve that shit like with a minecraft pickaxe, bitch.

Am not sure how the whole chakra thing even fucking works but its not a science. It's writer bia- okay fine. But assuming its basically the thing they use like the concept of mana to kill things and people i guess because killing people is all they do and for what FOR WHAT im going back to dragonball z that was some good shit yu gi oh seemed like good shit too but idk man i never watched or played it. Deidara motherfucking engineered a whole ass death robot made of clay powered by mana. How he do that i dont know. Fuck. Sasuke's just using an electric stick and summoning satan and satan gave him a, what was that? The tokyo ghoul appendage thingy. Hes becoming an eldritch fursona to beat this bitchboy. Thats so boring.

Just because deidara is, or has the capability and potential of a great warrior, doesnt mean he has to do something a certain way just because people want him to. Like, its understandable if they commissioned him. But they didnt even commission him they just kidnapped him somehow and left lol. He lives the life he wants. Hes not an idiot, a narcissist, a freak or a terrible person, for wanting what he wants.

The murder? Yeah that could be a discourse ngl.

Between the government that mongers war, radical violence everywhere, innocent people that arent really innocent, and bad people that arent exactly bad and dont get therapy at all ever, and just the world generally being on fire for seemingly no reason, who is he supposed to "side with". What would that help. He's just thinking for himself, and processing this as an individual and not because oh somebody told me this was right- like, why is it right then? Tell me this, or you will be cut like a throat in the 1800s by a hatpin.

Supposedly "bombing innocent towns" is just as bad as serving the akatsuki. The uchiha clan entire town was hell bent on eliminating everyone else so that they wouldnt die, yeah and, so everyone else has to? Just to let you live? Fuck you. And itachi and sasuke's parents. Love your children for once- oh wait, you can't. You literally cannot. Sorry, my bad.

I mean both parties, the towns and the akatsuki did contribute to the general violence and giant, war culture, in the whole place. When they could like try to solve a problem without a dbz fight.

The only time we see him do a lets kill the innocent is under akatsuki order, bombing gaara's motherland, it still is even if he got no parents left yknow, and fighting the man of sand of man himself, with tobi, or sasori i forgot, oh and sasori is put in better light solely because he respects the eternity. Ok i see u. Its still art though, but it involves self preservation at multiple costs, including people, and this 35 year old in a 15 year old teenage emo boy body is now a cold emotionless man serial killer, and that automatically makes him a better, or in this case, a more noble person. And this art he does is like the last and only part of his humanity he still has left. Dude thats just disturbing, and sad. He is literally naruto's dottore and people love him because he is definitely not a horrible person.

If a character you wrote doesn't fit your gladiator splatfest why did you write it just write sasuke 2 and give us the gladiator battoru scene then. Don't "art is stupid, join the army, and go to war" me.

People ask why someone would take pride in art, when they take pride in their capitalistic jobs, and pointless war mongering.

And then they make bokuto trying to, idk, be woke or something, and it flip flopped on its ass. Sarada has a missing father from her life and he supposedly loves her in his own way, without showing it at all. Sure. He didnt even bring the milk when he got back.

If you wanna fight my dumb rant opinion I just posted for fun give me an itachi therapy arc now.

#naruto feels a bit like the hp fandom #like people liked the series but not because of the writer and what they intended to do with the thing

[diamonds-dont-sparkle-they-shine]

Cat and Mouse (Demetri Volturi)

a Demetri Volturi × Swan!OC fic

chapter 1 >> chapter 2

(Word count: 7 382)

Lol so im gonna see if i can upload this before midnight, it's currently 11.43 in the night

Chapter 1

Mallory Swan did not know what the fuck was going on.

One minute, she gets a phone call from Jacob Black, saying that her sister decided to throw herself off a cliff (not his exact words, but that was what she got from his stuttering) - and the next, Mal finds herself in the backseat of Alice Cullen's car, the owner of said car going at an ungodly speed in the direction of the Port Angeles Airport. 

But the abrupt craziness didnt end there - apparently, Edward Cullen, the dude that stole Bella's heart and dumped her in the woods (literally) to freeze, was now on a suicide mission because he was somehow under the impression that Bella died when she had that oh-so-brilliant idea to jump off a freakin' cliff. 

Sometimes, Mal questioned her understanding of the human race - but then, she learned that Edward Cullen, and, well, the entire Cullen family, were not human... which probably explained why they were so fucked up to begin with, and why Mal's mind couldnt possibly begin to comprehend or even come to understand Edward and his motives. 

"He means well," Alice said after hearing Mal whisper "what the fuck" to herself for an enumerable amount of times (scratch that, Mal was sure Alice, in all her vampire-glory, counted the amount of times she did that), bringing Mal to only look at her in disbelief. Alice conceded, physically cringing as she said, "He has trouble expressing himself."

"Yeah bet." That made Mal realise that she, a seventeen year old teenage human being, had much better social skills and brain cells than a somewhat eighty year old vampire guy. (Mal wasn't sure how old Edward was - but eighty seemed like a nice enough number, so she just went with that.)

Mal couldn't remember much of what happened after the drive to Port Angeles - they boarded a plane, Mal slept away on it while Bella and Alice spoke in what they probably hoped were hushed voices, and then they got off the flight, only to board another one. They nearly missed their connecting flight to wherever it was that Alice said they needed to go, and so, the run only woke Mal up, the adrenalin making her mind run at what felt like a 180 in a 100 zone. She didnt get much sleep after that, unlike Bella, who clocked out for most of that flight, which only gave Mal the opportunity to ask Alice for a run-down of what the fuck was happening, and why the fuck were they fleeing the country. (In truth, Mal only tagged along because she didnt want to leave her somewhat-suicidal sister alone with the sister of the boy who abandoned her in the woods at the beginning of winter! What sort of sister would that make her? A disappointing one? If it meant anything, Mal did not disappoint.)

So, turns out, in the span of some 24 hours, Bella tried pulling some sort of bravado kamikaze move by launching herself off a cliff (something she fervently denied when Alice first shouted her at the Swan residence back in Forks), and then Alice saw her do the kamikaze dive, and didn't see her live thereafter in some sort of whack vision (because apparently Alice is a seer now), and then Alice told Rosalie or the family or something, and then Rosalie told Edward who apparently can read minds (Mal was super weirded out by this because - doesn't this guy know the definition of privacy? Mal didnt, but she knew the gist of what the word meant - which was; back - the fuck - off), and then Edward got like, super depressed because apparently he's madly in love with Bella and chose to leave her in the forest to freeze or whatever because that'd be better than her life being in constant danger because Edward was a vampire. (Mal saw that Eddy had good intentions… he just wasn't good at executing plans that came along with his good intentions. Instead of keeping Bella from harm - his actions served as a catapult, and there went Bella flying, into a burning fire… or in Bella's case, over a cliff and into the ocean!)

So after Edward found out - well, Alice "saw" that he'd find out, and then she came rushing to Forks to check on Charlie because apparently Bella was dead for reals (yes, Alice took her visions very seriously) but no, she found that Bella was very much alive, and then Edward - he called home and Jacob answered the call and said that Charlie was at a funeral. 

Now Mal understood where Jacob was coming from - really - Edward was this little shit who left Bella in the middle of the forest after saying him and his family were leaving Forks for forever or something like that. Look, Mal didn't really care about the politics or reasonings, all she cared about was the fact that her sister got deserted in the woods by this guy she was head over heels with - she would have much rathered he deserted her in some place safer, like their home, or their backyard, or like Bella's car or something. Not in the forest where Mal had seen actual dead bodies of humans - victims of, now it made sense, not just animals, but vampires! The kind that ate people! (Because apparently the Cullens were not your average vampires - no, their eyes were a golden yellow, because of their diet. "Vegetarians", Alice said, smiling, even though her brother was going to commit suicide any minute now. That only made Mal cringe because - ew, plants, how does that even work? - but then Alice clarified, they don't eat humans, they eat animals, which made Mal upset, because if vampires ate animals, then wouldn't that lead to a shortage of animals for humans to eat? Alice tried objecting but Mal stopped listening… staring out the window of the plane, watching as the clouds went by. Mal suddenly wanted to throw herself out into the sky, but she couldnt, because she'd die… and Mal valued her life very much to be that stupid.)

So, after they boarded their flights and reached their airports - Alice did some tom-thievery, and she stole a porsche. Mal was okay with that, because it was a fast car, and it looked cool. But then, Alice told Bella to get out of the car - that, Mal was not cool with, because, what the hell, Alice?

So Mal voiced her thoughts, and she followed after Bella, the sun blinding her, but that was alright, because hey, at least she wasn't burning like those vampires, right?

Or - well, Mal was confused. Because she saw Bella throw her entire body at Edward (after having very dramatically run through a fountain) who was glimmering. Literally. In the sunlight. 

"What the fuck," Mal whispered, weren't vampires supposed to - you know, burn, in the sun?

And wasnt Edward supposed to be committing suicide???

How the fuck was him shining like a disco ball, committing suicide?

Yeah, Mal remembered what Alice said about the Volturi - them being the governing board and whatever - and she remembered what Alice said about Edward making a scene… but Mal honestly thought that at the end of Eddy's little "scene", he'd be gone, capiche, turned to ash and dust - or charcoal, whatever it was that would be left behind of him once he burned in the sun. 

But holy fucking cow did Edward Cullen not burn in the sun, and holy fucking hell was Mal starting to freak out when she entered the Clock Tower after Edward and Bella - because holy fucking cheese-sticks did she realise the entire world's lore and mythos regarding vampires was entirely incorrect. Mal could only think about the paper work - and she would have cried about it, had she not been herded alongside the two idiot Cullens and her likewise sister into a creepy ass hatch thing that plunged them all into darkness.

Mal knew, as she watched Bella dip first, that she was going to have to focus on everything around her entirely, if she wanted to have a slim chance at survival.

And so, Mal did. 

She counted the steps, memorised the turns, and touched the walls. All the while a small map formed at the back of her head, while she followed along the group and found an elevator. 

Mal counted the seconds while she was inside the elevator, willing herself to be calm - surely, there would be a place to hide wherever they were going… but oh, they were going down… deeper and deeper underground… and Mal found herself grasping onto her sanity by adding to the little map in her head. Maybe, just maybe, she could take Bella and run from wherever the bad vampire people were taking them to - while, of course, Alice and Edward held them off. They'd probably die doing that, though, seeing as they were already outnumbered (Mal wasn't hard-headed enough to actually think Bella and her would help tip the scales a bit), but that would probably be alright for Edward, seeing as he so desperately wanted Bella to live - but that wasn't Mal's problem. Her only problem was living, and trying to find a way to keep on living - and maybe find a way to get herself and her sister out of the vampire's lair, say, alive…

But whatever childish hope Mal had when she entered what looked like a throne room, and the group was greeted by one black-haired dude that reminded Mal of ravens, was diminished once her eyes took in every facet of the room. 

There were no windows. At all. 

Mal was screwed.

She was so screwed.

She was so so so screwed.

She almost started laughing - but then she heard the dude laugh, and Mal realised, with widened eyes, that this must have been one of the leaders; a king. Maybe, if she went about things properly, she could butter him up, and he could let her and her sister leave with their lives. 

So of course, after Edward got his ass handed to him by the creepy blonde girl, and Aro turned to her with sudden interest, she only waved, "Hi," and then handed him her hand willingly, all the while her mind screamed, "DON'T KILL ME DONT KILL ME DONT KILL ME PLEASE DON'T KILL ME SIR PLEASE SIR PLEASE!"

Mal held her breath as she saw the king tilt his head to the side, his eyebrows furrowed in concentration, before he nodded, dropping her hand and leaving Mal feeling happy. At least he agreed that he wouldn't kill her… 

But then, Aro said, "Interesting," and turned around to face the thrones and the other two kings, and Mal's instincts screamed at her to find an escape - any sort, but Mal couldn't. 

The only evident exit in the room that was closest to her and easily accessible, was the huge grate a little ahead of her, before the thrones. 

Mal was beginning to feel hopeless, because if she wanted to make it out of there alive, she was going to have to lift the lid of the grate really fast… fast enough so the vampires wouldnt beat her to it. And from the little she saw of Edward getting his ass beat - she knew that the possibilities of her reaching the grate, lifting it up long enough for herself and Bella to slip through and thereafter try to make their escape, was nil.

Consumed by the realisation of her damnation, Mal hadn't noticed the main king, Aro, give the order for the killing to start - she hadn't noticed the fact that Bella had been spun around with a slight touch of one vampire, or the fact that she had remained unapproached on the side. Yeah, she heard some crashing and marble breaking and also some hissing, but that was all happening too fast, and Mal had yet to come up with a successful escape plan. She couldn't focus on Edward getting his ass handed him to him once again, though this time, it was quite literal, or the fact that he was getting his ass handed to him because he didn't want the vampire who was kicking his ass to kill her sister and herself - no, Mal's mind was a little preoccupied, running too fast for her yo actually properly think and understand whatever it was trying to communicate to her…

Until, of course, Mal heard screaming - it was more like a desperate plea, though - and she found that it came from her sister, who had a brilliant idea of trading places with Edward. Scratch that. It wasn't a brilliant idea. It was a stupid one, because Edward was actually taking Bella's place to die, sort of, by interfering when the king gave the silent order for the girls to get killed. 

But regardless of what Mal was thinking, Bella's display of desperate love and need for the undead Edward to remain alive (or was it unalive, seeing as Eddie didn't even breathe anymore?) indefinitely, gained the attention and interest of Aro, and he called for the huge bodybuilder to stop in his ripping of Edward's head. Mal had only just seen cracks appear on Edward's neck, before they began to disappear, no doubt from the pressure, before she turned back to Bella and Aro, who were having a very deep conversation regarding the undead's ability to possess a soul. 

Mal thought they were all being very, very stupid in that moment - because, of course they had souls! How else would they, oh i don't know, move?!

All in all, Mal was confused as fuck, especially when Aro decided that, oh well, he heard enough about a teenage girl knowing a guy she met only a year ago, better than him, a century-old grandpa who literally accessed the fucking inside of his mind not too long ago. 

Yeah, Mal could only cringe at the thought of letting a super old guy that retained a super young-ish look touch her hand, only to be able to know every fucking thing she ever thought. Yeah, Mal was cringing just then and there, remembering that he touched her hand only a moment back, which meant he knew of all of those embarrassing moments she had, such as getting her head stuck under the root of a huge tree somewhere in the depths of the forest back in forks, and only being found by some really hot guys her age who ran around in jean shorts and no shirts, because her arms weren't short and she couldnt move them without seeing them, so - Aro saw all of that, and more.  Which meant : fuck. Mal just wanted to die already.

Or so she thought, because when she noticed Aro going for Bella's neck, she made a move forward, but immediately found her path blocked by a figure clad in black. She didn't even have time to push against the body, when Alice spoke up. 

"Wait! Bella will be one of us. I've seen it. I'll change her myself." 

Ah, yes, another 'what the fuck' moment for Mal, except this time, she said it in a barely audible whisper (which, obviously, all of the vampires in the room heard, because, duh, they're fucking vampires, and Bella too probably knew what Mal had whispered - after all, it was all she'd been whispering the entire day.)

Aro then moved a step away from Bella (Mal could only see this because she could peek a little over the vampire's shoulder, if she stood on her tippy toes), and held a hand out for Alice, who was hesitantly putting her hand in his. 

Tactile telepathy, Mal thought. Cool. Before she realised that, no, in fact, tactile telepathy was not cool, because that would mean you'd be reading whoever's mind whose body you just touched - so, say, you just want a hug from someone or a kiss on the cheek, but all you'd be getting in place of that was a flurry of thoughts. What if that person who gave you a hug was being super weird about it? Mal could only cringe, mentally, of course, because everyone in the throne room at that moment were still as statues, which only unnerved Mal, more.

"Mesmerising," Aro said, looking high as fuck, "to see what you have seen, before it has happened." Right. That didn't make any sense at all to Mal - but then again, not much did in the last few days, so who was she to judge? (Even though that didn't stop her from judging everyone around her with a very harsh, and critical eye. She should try judging herself.)

"Your gifts," he turned his attention to Bella, "will make for an intriguing immortal." What a fucking weirdo, Mal thought, not entirely understanding what he meant by Bella's "gift" - Alice's future-seeing worked on her, didn't it? So maybe only psychic abilities, like that blondie's gift of making Edward seize on the ground, didn't work on her? 

Oh, Mal could see why Aro was interested in Bella now - because that was a sort of cool gift. Bella was like, a door handle that refused to open (with regards to other psychic gifts) - she wouldn't let them into their mind. Mal was sad she didn't have her fair share in that gift. Was it hereditary? If so, she'd have some serious talking to do with her dad. 

Speaking, or, well, thinking of herself - Aro turned in Mal's direction, bringing her eyes to widen. Did she speak out loud? No, she didn't. She would have remembered hearing herself talk.

"But our business remains unfinished," Aro said, and Mal immediately knew he was talking about her.

And so, she squeeked, took a step back, and pointed at herself, saying, "Me?" Suddenly, the grate that was only a foot away from her and blocked by the vampire before her, seemed too far away… but still, that was her only way out, if she needed to run.

Mal felt that she'd need to run, soon. And fast, if she wanted to see the next sunset.

"The law demands it," Aro said, and Mal thought there must have been some words of his that she hadn't been getting - not while her mind started running again, sprinting, while the sound of her heart beating filled her ears. 

Oh there was no way in hell Mal was going to let herself die, she thought, quickly looking to the grate and coming up with a strategy she could use to get out. 

Edward had his head locked in the hands of the giant guard, so he'd be useless.

Bella was human, but she wouldn't die, because Alice said she was going to be turned into a vampire soon. And also, well, Aro seemed to like Bella a lot. Or rather, he seemed to like the vampire she'd become. Regardless, Bella wouldn't die, so Mal could afford leaving her behind - making her escape suddenly a thousand times easier.

And Alice - oh, Alice was going to be her saving grace. She only hoped that Alice would see what she planned on doing in the next few seconds or so…

"Wait!" Alice said. "If you kill her, you'll only be bringing about the start of the end of your coven."

Mal forgot all about her escape, and only blinked dumbly at Alice - Aro did the same, and while they all turned to face the pixie haired girl, Mal could only think about how, at that moment, Alice sounded like an actual seer. Sure, she was no Cassandra or Trelawney, she still had a long way to go - but hey! This was a start! She sounded as if she was actually about to start sprouting a prophetic sonnet or two. 

"She's the tracker's mate," Alice explained, and Mal's mind zeroed in on the word "mate". What the fuck was a mate?

The only "mate" Mal knew of, was the kind that you got in the wild, you know, animals that procreated with each other, producing more than one generation (i.e. wolves in packs with their "mates", the ones they hunted with, fed with, led the pack with, and, you know, made little wolf pups with) - that, and Australians. Mal didn't think Alice was talking about her being best buds with the tracker - whoever the hell he was - so the Australian use of "mate" was out of the question. 

Which left Mal with the other use of "mate" - and it made her stomach churn, just as the really blonde king spoke up in a hiss.

"Kill her for her lies," honestly, Mal would have thought her freaking out over the use of the word "mate" was a little over dramatic… but having seen the look of outrage on the king's face, and the venom in his voice… Mal was too afraid, too shocked, to even voice her thoughts, which were a teary : YOU GUYS WANT ME TO FUCK A DEAD PERSON WHAT THE FUCK ?

Alice ignored the king, "If you kill her, your coven falls, or begins to," and then her hand was taken by Aro's, and whatever it was that Alice saw, Aro took part of it too -

It is quick. Alec tears into Mal's neck, and her body falls to the ground. Demetri, who was behind Alice, takes a step back, his entire body seeming to falter as his face becomes filled with confusion, and then his eyes widen in shock, and his nose flare in disbelief as he looks to Alec, who remains unaware. It's a good opportunity for Demetri to enact revenge on Alec, considering his back is facing Demetri… and Demetri, seeing this, takes a step forward, before he abruptly stops.

The room changes. As do the people within it. Alec is missing. As is Demetri. As is Felix. The only person of the elite guard is Jane, whose face looks withered, and eyes a near-black. She stands in front of Aro's throne - which is empty - between Caius and Marcus. Caius looks angry, but Aro recognises the worry in his brow, while Marcus looks sad. More so than normal. 

Aro sees himself pace - a hand over his mouth, his hair unbrushed. He finds his body stop, and he looks to the other kings. Worry is evident in his eyes. His mouth opens to say something, but the room is suddenly dark, and all they hear are screams, and loud, very loud, footsteps - 

Meanwhile, Mal was freaking out, mentally, of course. No one could have possibly known what she was freaking out about, other than, of course, Edward, whose eyes only met her in - well, Mal couldnt begin to comprehend what that look was in Edward's eyes, because she was freaking the fuck out. 

There was no way in hell she was somebody's "mate" - hell, Mal had no "mates" of her own, back at home. She was perfectly fine being just by herself - always, alone, content with translating whatever mad idea that had found its way in her head for the day onto pieces of paper she would string together, if she couldn't find her notebook. She almost always could never find the empty notebooks she bought herself at the bookstores. They just seemed to disappear whenever she needed them most… and when she didn't need them, she'd find them and put them in a place she was absolutely sure she'd be able to find them, like under her bed, or in the little spaces between her bed frame and the mattress… she must have had other places she hid them all, obviously, if she never found them in those places when she needed the books the most. 

All things aside, Mal was happy with the way things were in her life - she was happy with Forks, and her rainy skies and cold beaches. She was happy with the never-ending trees and all the stories that were never told. She was happy with not knowing about vampires - because having found out about actual vampires, the ones that were the entire Cullen family, Mal found herself feeling extremely disappointed. Not entirely in them, but in herself, for not figuring out they were vampires. But hey, it wasn't as if she had any classes with them, what with being a year lower than Bella and Edward… but still. Mal had certain expectations about herself - she was a writer, for god's sake, not a good one, but a writer nonetheless. She should have known about the Cullens… if she did, then maybe she could have done something to stop the Cullens leaving - oh my fucking god what if somebody found about the Cullens and that's why they had to leave? How fucking dumb am i what the fuck.

Mal wanted to cry, just then. Not because she long tuned out whatever was happening around her, but because she couldnt believe just how dumb she was. Hell, if these vampires killed Mal right then and there, she'd be so fine with it, because she was just so disappointed in herself. 

It was in that moment that Mal heard Aro speak up - his voice echoing around the room, as if everyone had been silent during the time he held Alice's hand. Mal didn't know, mainly because Mal wasn't focusing on them anymore. 

"It… is true," he said, though he sounded very hesitant - unsure, and Mal found that the king that looked the most emo out of all of the vampires in the room, opened his mouth to speak. 

Mal had a feeling that if vampires were as loud as humans, she would have heard them all take a deep breath in. 

"It is," was all he said, looking at Mal, directly, which scared her a little, before his eyes darted elsewhere - probably looking at the other person she was supposed to be best-mates with, or whatever… that didn't matter. Not really, she told herself, because all that mattered was that she was going to live - she was going to get out of there, alive. And regardless of what she'd said, Mal valued her life. Greatly. So, really, pushing the whole creepy "mate" thing aside, Mal should have been happy - because she couldn't possibly be killed, not if the kings wanted their coven to like, get destroyed.

Suddenly, Mal felt smug. She was a catalyst for their destruction - and while villains in other stories would have killed her for being such a thing, these villains, could not. Because her death was the means to bringing about their end. And Mal absolutely loved that, and so, with a miniscule smile on her face, Mal asked, "So i can go, then?"

Silence filled the air, and the vampire that was in front of her, was gone. Poof. 

Everyone stared at her, and Mal couldn't help the smile that slowly began to form on her face, "You guys cant kill me… so i get to go, right?" 

The vampires were silent - Bella, as well, was silent. 

"Right?" Mal asked again, this time raising an eyebrow. She really shouldn't have asked a second time - she shouldn't have asked the first time, because that was just her jinxing herself. 

"Right," she said, "so i'm just gonna go," she said, pointing over her shoulder and taking slow steps back. 

She didn't get far. 

"I'm afraid we cannot allow for that," Aro said, and Mal got the feeling that he wasn't afraid at all.

"What?" Mal asked, eyebrows pulled together. "Why not?"

"Watch. your. tongue," the blonde king gritted out, glaring at Mal, but Mal ignored him. In her opinion, Aro had the most say in what happened. So, he was the one she was going to have to worry about, the most.

"It pains me to separate siblings," he said, looking almost apologetic, as his eyes darted from Bella to Mal, "but I cannot allow for Mallory's release. The rest of you, however, are free to go or stay, as you please."

Mal's mouth dropped open. The fuck?

The giant guard let Edward go, and immediately, he was by Bella's side, holding onto her elbow as she took a step forward. "And why not?" She asked, and Mal would have cheered, but she found Aro's eyes light up as he watched Bella. 

Of course, she thought, Aro wants Bella. He's going to turn her into a vampire, and she'll be phenomenal, and because of that, he's going to want her. And what better way to keep her with them, than by keeping someone close to her, there?

"Why, because Demetri is a very valuable member to our coven," he explained. "And I thank you wholeheartedly, Alice Cullen, for helping prevent our destruction," he paused for effect, "but, I cannot let Mallory go, for she has become dear to us."

Alright, so clearly, everything Aro was saying was absolute bullshit.

"I don't understand," Bella said, looking up to Edward, whose eyes did not stray from Aro. Oh yeah, they were mental-bros. Telepaths, of different classes. Edward probably knew all the shit that was flying around in Aro's mind at that moment. 

"Perhaps," Aro said, smiling at Edward, "you could explain it to her… in a manner she would understand."

Edward's jaw was set, and Mal focused her eyes on him, suddenly feeling very invisible, because she wasn't being addressed, per say, only being spoken about. It frustrated her a little, but she pushed her ego aside and focused on what Edward had to say.

"Mallory is Demetri's mate," he started. "His soulmate. His other half. She completes the parts of him that cannot be completed by anyone else, and he completes the parts of her that cannot be completed alone." At the last part, Mal's head jerked back a bit, and Edward's eyes finally settled on her.

The fuck… she thought. So… they were soulmates?

Mal's mind was boggled.

There was absolutely no - way. No way. Nah ah. No ways. This wasnt happening. What the hell - Mal was only seventeen, and just found out about the existence of vampires, and now she was learning that she had a soulmate, and because of said soulmate, she wasnt allowed to leave? What kind of fuckery was this??? The other theory she had about mates made more sense! The parts about the procreation! Even though she wasn't keen on procreating with an essentially dead person, that somehow made more sense to Mal than this. 

Though, the more Mal began to think about it - the idea of soulmates, the splitting of atoms that were once together from before the beginning of time… the imagery and thought and idea of the existence of soulmates settled in an oddly… endearing way, in Mal's heart. 

But wait - for them to be real? Mal felt herself beginning to fall off the edge of sanity. (Kind of like how Bella fell off the cliff, back in Forks.)

No. This couldn't be possible. No ways. 

"No thank you," Mal said, pursing her lips and shaking her head. She turned away from Edward and looked to Aro, saying, "I don't like your reasoning very much, so i'm just going to ignore whatever happened over here, and im going to leave, alright? Great! Let's go," she said, turning around, but Aro's voice stopped her.

"I wouldn't do that if i was you," and Mal heard the threat in his voice. She turned to face him, annoyance clear on her face, but she remained silent. 

"You have two choices set before you today - the first being, your stay in the castle." That didnt sound very nice. "Your sister and friends are more than welcome to stay, and after a period of time, you will be turned into a vampire, as will your sister." Edward's face soured, but Aro continued. "The second, of course, will be the termination of all who stands in the way of the law, which was broken, who knows how many times in these last few years." Mal watched as his eyes narrowed in on Alice and Edward - the more sensible of the two actually bowing her head in shame. 

Mal wanted to run. 

She wanted to run and run and keep on running and just - get out, but the grate was further from her, with the metal still on. She'd have to pry it open with her hands, and be quick with it, but first, she'd have to get to it before any of the vampires got to her -

"The choice is yours," Aro said, extending his hands, and Mal wanted to scream at him, but she still wanted to run… to flee… to escape. 

Tears filled her eyes as reality set upon her - in the end, regardless of what she made, she would still be stuck there, in the castle, underground, away from her family, her friends… if trees could be counted as friends. 

Regardless, Mal would be trapped. And Mal didnt like being trapped. 

"I just - want - to go home, sir," she gritted out the term of respect, before she pled her case. "Please."

"As I have stated before," Mal could see his irritation simmer, "that is not possible. Too many in the room know of your relations to Demetri, and thus, to us."

Mal wanted to scream. "But there is no relation," she exasperated, looking up at Aro, hoping to have mercy, just once… but little did she know, the Volturi were not merciful.

"You will learn the status of a mateship - a true one - soon, when time allows for it to grow." Mal wanted to scream then - this whole thing, the mate thing, was beginning to sound more like a burden than anything. 

So much for being soulmates, she thought bitterly, shaking her head.

"Now, your choice."

Edward made it for her.

"Keep her," he said, and Mal looked at him with betrayal clear in her eyes - she found Bella do the same. "She can be your guarantee, and a token of our coven's gratitude to you," Mal wanted to vomit, as fear began to claw itself through her. 

She looked to Bella, who looked at her, eyes wide, before her eyebrows pulled together apologetically, "I'll see you again," she said, and Mal shook her head as hot tears began to form. They were going to leave her. 

"No, no, no," Mal said, her voice a soft plea. "Please don't go," she said, taking a step towards her sister, but Edward pulled her back, sending a dagger - sharp, like the ones she used when she'd cut up fish with her father on his many fishing trips - into her heart.

"We're leaving," Edward said. "Now."

Alice walked over to him, and Mal looked over to her, eyes pleading, "Please - dont leave me."

Alice at least looked apologetic, while Edward straight up turned Bella by the shoulders away from her, turned his back to her as well, and walked away. 

Mal felt like dying. 

Were they really leaving her? In Italy? Alone? With vampires who could drink her dry? (Mal knew they wouldnt kill her, but still.)

"Bella!" Mal said, trying to go after her sister, but a chest suddenly blocked her from doing so. 

"No!" She shouted, hitting the chest with her fist, but it was immovable. Like a rock. "BELLA!" She shouted again, trying to see her sister as she left. "Bella, don't leave me, please! Don't leave me!" Her shouts turned hysterical. "BELLA! BELLA PLEASE!" 

The door closed, and Mal felt the world close in on her - and she felt hands, cold like ice, on her arms, trying to stop her movements, but Mal only pulled her arms to herself harder.

"No!" She said, her voice suddenly hard, her words gritted. "No, get your hands off of me!"

And their hands were gone, and Mal found herself glaring at a blonde whose haircut was… questionable. But Mal didn't let herself think on it anymore than she needed, because her mind immediately turned in on itself to find her an escape. 

She was so not getting left behind in Italy. She was going to make sure of that. 

Immediately, her eyes settled on the grate - only, it was so much further from her now, which only made Mal breathe heavily, because Alice and Edward were not there anymore to be her distractions, and Bella… Bella was gone.

Bitch, she thought, before turning around again, finding the world spinning - the lack of windows made her mind spin, it made her world turn cloudy. It made her feel claustrophobic. And the fact that she couldn't see any other door, any other form of escape… Mal felt trapped, and she felt like dying. She felt as if she were dying - as if she were in a coffin without holes, already put six feet under ground, where no one could hear her screams of terror. 

"Alec," she heard Aro's voice, only that it wa so far away - and when Mal turned to look at him, Mal found the world washed with… her tears. They were hot, again, and on her cheeks. And wet. And Mal felt as if she couldn't - see, but she screamed. 

"I said DON'T FUCKING TOUCH ME," and Mal forced her legs to carry her through the horrible fog that appeared out of nowhere - she could see it, light, glimmery, like a shift in the air, and she also couldnt see it. But she could feel it, like a soft numbing kiss over her eyelids, and a tingling in her hands and legs. 

"Don't, you fucking," she gritted, looking straight at the fog as it came closer to her. She could see it, and she could also feel the way it made her body scream with fear. To, "Stay. The fuck. Away. From me."

"How curious…"

"Alec," came an edged voice, but Mal couldnt fucking think. She wanted to get to the grate, really, because it was her only fucking escape, but she had no - no plan. The odds were piled so high - so high against her. Even her desperation was beginning to win, as her tears continued falling -

But then the doors opened again, and a cheerful lady wearing a pretty red dress walked in, smiling as she greeted the kings with a bow. 

"Heidi!" Aro greeted her. "How wonderful for you to join us. And oh, guests! I do love guests!" He sounded surprised, but Mal couldn't think properly - not when she saw the doors open, and she was about to sprint for them, her only possible escape, when she felt a hand gripping her arm, tightly, bringing her to look at the person who did so with burning eyes. 

Mal found that it was the blonde man who stood in front of her from earlier - the one who grabbed her arms, and Mal felt herself burn with rage. 

He was not going to ruin her escape, she thought, already pulling her free arm back, in an attempt to punch his face really hard, when he only took a hold of that arm, and said, "Come," nodding in the direction of the door. 

Mal calmed, not entirely, but she wasn't crying, not as she looked in the direction of the door, and then at the red eyes of the man who held her hands. 

He let go of her, and nodded, and turned his back to her, walking in that direction. 

Mal couldn't help but follow - she hadn't even realised she was through the doors when it suddenly closed, and when she turned, she found herself facing the chest of the vampire, and then hearing screams which set her off again - she wanted to run, but found her her ams being held by his hands, yet again. 

"Look ahead," he said. "Focus on anything, except that," he said, but Mal couldn't hear him. Not when she realised that there were people - actual people in that room, and they were screaming, not because they were frightened, but because they were being killed, one after the other, by the people she was supposed to be staying with for an indefinite amount of time. 

Mal felt sick to her stomach, and could do nothing for herself, except breathe in deeply through her nose, and then exhale. 

"Good," the vampire said, and Mal wanted to punch him again, "breathe."

Mal relaxed herself, and when he let go of her, she glared at him, looking at him in the eye, before she took a step closer to him - and then she moved to punch him, moving from his abdomen upwards, but the minute her fist made contact with his skin, it was set alight, and Mal cried out, immediately drawing her hand back as she felt flames engulf her bones.

"FU-UCK!" She cried out, tears falling from her eyes again as she bit down on her lip, hoping to stifle her cries and the pain, but it didn't help. "Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK," she cried, hopping around as she cradled her fist to her chest. She closed her eyes, breathing in, deciding she wasn't even going to look at it, because what if she broke it? Seeing it broken would only make the pain worse. But fuck. Her whole arm, let alone fist, was on fire. 

"You have an interesting choice of words," the vampire said. "It almost makes me wonder just how extensive your vocabulary is."

Mal looked at him with a glare, "Don't fucking patronise me, you dick."

The vampire smirked, holding a finger up at her as he said, "Ah, there it is again. That lovely word."

Mal gritted her teeth. He was fucking patronising her. 

The vampire suddenly took a step towards her, bringing Mal to take a step away from him, suddenly very weary of him. He looked as one usually would after sighing, before saying, "Your hand," holding his out. 

Mal shook her head. There was no way in hell she was going to let him touch her hand - it hurt too much.

Her refusal only made the vampire look in the distance - and Mal realised he was looking in the direction of the throne room, the door remained closed - before he looked back to her, this time, his face collected, free of any smirks or smiles, and said, "Come."

"No," Mal said.

"Come with me," he repeated, this time, there was an edge to his voice.

Mal didn't care. Her hand was already injured - maybe, if he got really angry, he could accidently kill her and put an end to her misery. That'd be sad, but it was better than living wuth the knowledge of being abandoned by her older sister in a Vampire's lair for fuck's sake.

"No," she shook her head. "My dad's a cop, and he told me to never go walking alone with strangers." Of course, Mal didn't always listen to her father, but that was when she had her trusty pepper spray or knife with her. Currently, she had none.

The vampire's jaw went taught, and Mal was impressed with the look of it, before he said, "I am to escort you to your room." He paused. "And i would appreciate it if you hurried along, because i… am hungry."

Mal raised an eyebrow, considering telling hin to just bite into her neck and get it over and done with. But instead, she said, "Say please."

Mal heard him breathe out air, the sound of his exasperation was paired with… a growl. Something which slightly scared Mal, if she was going to be honest, but then, he breathed in, smiled at her, and said, "Please?"

Mal didn't even think to bother him anymore, the growling sound was no doubt him - and it scared her enough to keep her silent through her own pain, and simply nod for him to lead the way. 

He returned her nod, and when he turned his back to her, Mal looked in the direction of the door that they came out of - and estimated a number in her head.

"It would not be wise to run," he said. "I will find you, indefinitely." 

Mal didnt want to see him try, and so, she turned to face him a few paces ahead of her, saying, "I'm not entirely stupid," a smile slowly forming as she took steps which she counted, a plan already beginning to take form in her mind. 

Ah, sadness, it's 12.18 in the night and i've only just finished transferring chapter 1 from my google docs , but oh well

Mal swears a lot, yes, i know, not because she's 17, but because i was in a funny swearing mood when i wrote this sooo... also it's especially funny for me seeing as i dont swear, and also because Mal is essentially surrounded by ancients and she's just got the mouth of a sailor (not really but i mean how many times have i dropped the f bomb in this??? Idk im not gonna count i'll just be humourously disappointed in myself)

Anyways hope you guys enjoyyyyyed

#demetri volturi #mallory swan #mal swan #volturi #aro volturi #twilight #bella swan #edward cullen #alice cullen #cat and mouse

[thatsthetriick]

Jjba characters in a coming of age movie with their s/o

Summary: What if you and (insert jjba character) are in a coming of age movie? What would happen in the movie, how would you interact?  Header photo: Haruiro astronaut Pairings: Joestars x s/o

Jonathan Joestar  ── Bleachers ♡ You’ll probably be in a boarding school in the 1960s in england. ♡ He is the star student and you’re probably just a normie and you wouldn’t want to associate yourself with him and you just want to live a peaceful life ♡ You’ll be asked to assist the rugby team in exchange for some grades and you couldn’t deny it so you agreed with your teacher and you two had a deal. Your job is simple, all you need to do is just to be in charge of the attendance and be the coach’s spokesman if he’s busy and it wasn’t that bad. ♡ You are also a supervisor whenever the coach is not around and you overall just support everyone just like an assistant. They need water? you’ll get some for the whole team, etc. ♡ Jonathan will honestly start developing feelings for you, and you to him, he starts helping you with your homework on the bleachers and you two will go anywhere together, and you’ll mostly be the one to rebel and sneak out at night to hang out with him and he’d usually feel scared to skip but he didnt let his fear take over him and he just followed you. ♡ The conflict is probably the fact that you witnessed a girl confessing to him near a fountain within school grounds, it kinda broke your heart and lost your motivation to assist the team yet you still continued. ♡ Your ending is probably depressing because he really likes this girl who confessed to him(probably Erina) so you’re left in the shadow and moreover it’s hard to skip and rebel with him when he prioritizes his girlfriend all the time. ♡ Your iconic scene with him is probably him helping you on the bleachers. Joseph Joestar  ──Coward ♡ It’ll be 2000s in america as well probably and this movie will be a enemies to lovers thing huehue.  ♡ You and Joseph hate each other and the whole school knew that and no one ever knew why, maybe because the first day you went to school you accidentally bumped to him and made your food go over him which made him held a grudge on you but at the same time flirt with you? Or make odd statements which just annoys you. ♡ You don’t take him seriously, you take him as a playboy so his flirts wouldn’t affect you at all and it’s not like you’ll take the praises that came out of that brunette’s mouth. ♡ It all changed when obviously you two got assigned in a project that requires the both of you to go to each other’s houses and at first you two argued a lot but you two started thinking that maybe it’s not that bad. ♡ The conflict is probably the fact that this guy likes another girl and you start getting confused with your emotions everytime he interacts with his girl crush, you really feel jealous but you’re still in denial. ♡ He also has feelings for you honestly but since he knew you practically hated so he knew he had NO chance which is why he just shooed his feelings away for you even though he genuinely really liked you.   ♡ You get into a rivalary with the girl he liked which led to the two of you arguing publicly and you probably got embarrassed since she revealed to everyone that you liked Joseph. ♡ Joseph actually felt really happy to hear this and the movie ends with the two of you dating but being really good friends as well. ♡ Your iconic scene with him is both of you lying down on his bed while looking at the ceiling and talking about stories you two experienced. Jotaro Kujo  ──Not that necessary ♡ The setting would probably be somewhere in the 1990s in america in a tiny town somewhere. ♡ Jotaro never really had a permanent home and by this he constantly moved town to town, which means he never really got close with anyone else in his schools and he’d prefer it that way that he wont just get close to anyone ♡ Though he continues being in arguments and physical fights and one of the fights got him in detention with you, now you in the other hand always get in detention for your little pranks to the teachers or skipping and getting caught, let’s just say that in this movie you’re not really the best student and you didn’t really care moreover mind, but when you saw Jotaro you got a vibe you two will get along. ♡ Since you two were the only ones in the classroom you whisper him to follow you as you two escape the window, he’ll probably groan or grunt at you at first but he’ll eventually follow you to get out of detention without using the front door. ♡ You two escape outside the window and run to a forest nearby probably, he’s not much of a talker so you did the talking for him most of the time, you two will do a lot of things in this movie, such as climbing rooftops of houses or going to playgrounds while talking or just bike around the neighbourhood, getting ice cream. ♡ The conflict here is that he’ll be moving soon and it’s hard for the both of you to be separated, since he doesnt’ want you to get hurt his immature 17 year old self would probably tell you that he doesn’t want to be friends or something that hurts, like “I never liked you as a friend anyways”, “ I just used you.” ♡ You would be heartbroken and deep inside you didn’t know why he would randomly tell these things to you and you would distance yourself from him and school generally that’s how much it affected your friendship. ♡ The ending would probably be upsetting and sad with you being left in the town and with Jotaro leaving, he really thought that he could make you leave him by insulting you but it just made you sad instead of being mad at him honestly. ♡ Though the epilogue would probably give the audiences hope since you two will bump to each other 8 years later as adults. ♡ Your iconic scene with him is probably walking to the forest and you doing the talking for him. Josuke Higashikata  ──It started at the Diner  ♡ The setting would probably be in the 50s in a 50s diner in america.  ♡ You were a teenage regular customer there probably a loner and perfect student who’s got everything and is technically bored of life ♡ Everything changed when a bunch of deliquents sat on a table across yours and one of them got your attention the most, he probably saw you staring and you would feel embarrassed honestly and you will hesitate talking to him. ♡ You’ll only probably meet him there but you’ll eventually find him in the town and encounter him everywhere but you still hesitate to talk to him but you two started to talk and there was instant connection. ♡ The iconic scenes you would have with him is probably talking to him in a diner. ♡ The movie would probably also show about your boring life becoming more interesting as you rebel with him, the movie will show the message that teenagers should have fun while they can especially when they are still in their childhood, and that you should never miss the opportunity of meeting new people. ♡ The conflict in the movie is probably your school and your parents and their expectations and the fear that Josuke will be bored of you the more you focus on your education than friends and that he’ll eventually leave you, and how simple things in your life can easily block you from hanging out with him. ♡ The ending would probably be sweet and happy with the two of you spending your whole school year and summer bonding with each other, probably a open ending for the audience to decide. Giorno Giovanna ──Oh to see without my eyes ♡ Two of you are two teenagers in nothern italy which means you’re in a more grassy parts of italy, and you are in a wealthy family. The setting is 80s-90s italy ♡ He honestly goes to the same highschool as you  and he was the new student probably. Your movie with him is probably wholesome and calming and peaceful. ♡ You always like going on the waters and beaches and he would just watch splashing water around and swimming. You two enjoy hanging out at nighttime the most, you would run around the town laughing and biking around near the forest and you would have midnight picnics where you would make snacks for the both of you. ♡ It’s instant connection, the day you met you two were already connected and already friends and it stayed until this day. You two eventually also get feelings for each other honestly as you guys hangout everyday to entertain yourselves. He was kind and polite moreover a gentleman ♡ The conflict is that he has a dream, that he wants to becoming a don of a mafia and you couldn’t stop him and instead you just wholeheartedly supported him till he eventually had to leave you to persue his dream, he went missing and missed a lot of school days because of this. ♡ The ending is sad you two never saw each other again and he intentionally did this because he didnt want you to be in danger ♡ Your iconic scene with him is probably you walking on the shore of the ocean with him by your side as you two talk away as you feel the cold touch of the water touching your bare feet as he stays dry on the sand.

Sorry dudes I’m still in part 5 :”DD, srry for typos im tryna speedrun this xD, might do the jobros and jofoes next >:DD

#jjba part 1 #jjba part 2 #jjba part 3 #jjba part 4 #jjba part 5 #jojo x reader #jjba x reader #jojo's bizzare adventure x reader #jojo's bizzare adventure #jojo fanfics #jojo fanfic #jojo headcanons #jjba headcanons #jjba headcanon #joestars #joestar x reader #jotaro kujo #jonathan joestar #joseph joestar #giorno giovanna #josuke higashitaka #jotaro headcanons #joestar headcanons #jotaro x reader #giorno x reader #joseph joestar x reader #josuke x reader #reader #x reader #reader insert

[starfanatic]

So theres a story idea that popped into my head. I was reading the brave and the bold comic and in the last issue Barry is grieving over his dead wife, Iris. In the issue, Hal explained how he didnt really know how to help him so he decided that Barry should move in with him so hoepfully their friendship can help heal Barry.

I was planning on writing a fanfiction about Barry’s grief. And not just losing Iris, but losing his mother, losing his father (im not sure if Henry is even still alive, but even if he is alive Barry still lost his father). Even losing random strangers that The Flash couldn’t save in time. I was planning on it being in multiple perspectives (Barry himself, Hal, Nora right before she died, and Wally). And it being more about Barry healing from his trauma and depression.

Then I thought, why stop there? There is so many heroes who has to deal with grief constantly. What if there was a fic collection called “A Heroes’ Grief” with multiple fics of several heroes grieving over the people they have lost.

With Hal Jordan this can be while Hal is Parallax after Coast City was destroyed and Barry already being dead. This one can be in Hal obviously, Bruce, Oliver, Dinah, Diana, and Wally. Just Hal reflecting on all the people he lost (Barry, Iris (Iris dying obviously effected Barry more but it hurt Hal too), His father, and the entirety of Coast City).

Im not well knowledged about Booster Gold or Blue Beetle (the original) but a story about Michael grieving his best friend, and having to realize that theres nothing he could have done to stop it. Would be a good one.

Diana and loneliness. Something i think DC writer’s haven’t really thought of was that because Diana is immortal she most likely held people at arm’s length after Steve died because she knows that no matter what her time with them is limited. Diana is probably used to seeing the people she loves age and die, and being powerless to stop it. Diana in a way has become numb to this and instead of considering the time she has with people as a gift and as something precious. She thinks of it more as a ticking time bomb. This is purely in Diana’s view and its just Diana grieving tons of tons of people and then realizing the Justice League isn’t immortal either and a lot of them will inevitably leave her too.

Bruce is a big one. I don’t even think I really need to go into this but i kinda want to start it when he’s a kid and still trying to register what happened. Back when he was a kid he was far more vulnerable and emotional. He wasn’t used to just bottling in his emotions until he cracked. I want this one to be more in Alfred’s pov then anything.

The last one I had was Bart actually. This is more referring to YJ Bart, but his story is set after Barry died in Crisis and Hal dies after sacrificing himself (yes i know Barry is not dead in YJ and Hal hasnt became Parallax yet but this is set further in the future) I always felt like Bart’s grief was not talked enough about in YJ so I wanted to explore that. But not just Bart grieving Barry but the people he lost while in the reach apocalypse (his family and any allies) and Bart grieving Wally.

Unfortunately I had lost motivation in writing but i just wanted to put this idea out.

#hal jordan #green lantern #parallax #barry allen #the flash #crisis on infinite earths #young justice #justice league #diana princess of themyscira #wonder woman #batman #bruce wayne #bart allen #impulse #kid flash #wally west #booster gold #michael carter #blue beetle #ted kord #jaime reyes

[thornztli]

i've been thinking about this since bbh's stream where he killed skeppy and i think i know what happened at the end

i’ve mentioned this to a few friends but never actually posted it so here

so if you didn't already know, skeppy's and bbh's canon lives are intertwined. they're soulmates. bbh cannot lose a canon life until skeppy has lost all of his. he's basically immortal unless skeppy canonically dies, which is what has made the egg shit so annoying. nobody can kill bbh. and as we know, at the end of the stream, bbh accidentally pushed skeppy into lava and skeppy refused to get out, so skeppy lost a canon life.

a lot of people thought that this was some sort of weird dream or hallucination but i’m inclined to believe that it’s real life.

so if you remember back when skeppy first became infected, ant and puffy had suggested that bbh kill skeppy to try to get rid of the egg infection since nothing else seemed to be working. not holy water, not sand, or diamond, or the number 14, nothing. bbh refused, and puffy almost killed skeppy, but skeppy just kept running away, and they gave up. however now that skeppy has actually canonically died, i'm thinking that ant's and puffy's theory was right.

at the very end of the stream, you see skeppy in his house in big daddy island, which he and bad built together on skeppy's stream. it was non-canonical and just a place for them to mess around and hang out. you see him calling for bad, and he's blue and normal again.

my theory is that ant and puffy were right. when skeppy died, it got rid of the egg infection. remember how skeppy wasn’t at the red banquet? if he was still infected by the egg, even if he had died, wouldn’t he have been there to see such a major event for the egg? and remember that skeppy’s spawn was set to big daddy island at the time as well. it makes total sense for skeppy to be normal again, just stuck at big daddy island, far away.

(for the record, skeppy didnt know tommy and wilbur were doing lore when he accidentally killed friend and i don’t think it should be counted as an important plot point for skeppy’s character)

nonetheless, skeppy’s death leads me to believe the egg arc is probably coming to a close soon. remember that bbh's entire motivation for joining the egg is that he didn't know how to cope with the loss of skeppy. skeppy got infected by sacrificing himself to save bad first, and his sacrifice was eventually, a sacrifice in vain, as bbh got so depressed about skeppy that he joined the egg in order to be with skeppy again. but we saw how bbh was acting there. skeppy still didn't want him, infected or not. and so, bbh just kept losing faith in the egg. he was promised skeppy, and he got nothing. he was constantly telling the egg to shut up, to be quiet, and only apologizing when skeppy told him to. now that skeppy's okay, bbh's entire motivation for being with the egg is gone. i think bbh might either a.) gamble away a canon life at quackity's casino to break free from the egg, b.) go back to the original plan with the egg, which was to destroy it to become the heroes of the smp, or c.) break free of his own accord, now that he has nothing keeping him with the egg.

of course, bbh doesn’t know that skeppy could be cured now, but he implied at the end of the red banquet that he would be on his way to big daddy island, the last safe place he knew.

(it could also mean l’sandberg, but that’s unscripted as far as i know)

nonetheless, bbh is probs not gonna stay with the egg, leaving the eggpire as basically, just punz and ant. we have no idea what the egg has offered punz or ant, since we know nothing about their motivations. back in november or december, there was a theory going around that the egg offered ant his bf, velvet, and it would be how they introduced velvet to the smp, but that never happened and ant has refused to speak on his character's motivations (which probably isn’t an accident). punz isn't gonna do lore anyway lmfao he never logs on but if i had to judge, i'd say the egg offered him money, since it seems to be the only thing that works with him. as for ponk, ponk has lost a canon life and was only pretending to be with the eggpire in the first place to spy on them, and if my theory is right, he isn’t actually infected, just staying with the egg to stick it to sam for hurting him, since he lost his canon life after being infected.

purpled wasn’t actually infected, just a mercenary, and obviously sam, foolish, and puffy aren't a part of it. this also connects back to quackity’s casino. if gambling away a canon life can cure someone from the egg’s influence, how many people would take that chance? would bbh himself take it if it meant being able to be with skeppy again? would quackity take the lives himself if he came across that information?

just a thought.

#dsmp #dsmp theory #badboyhalo #skeppy #antfrost #punz #quackity #ponk #eggpire